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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 3 years

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Oh, No

Prompts: whenever you're down (and please rest bc at the rate you write fanfics you probably need it and you definitely deserve it) i have a prompt for a sanders sides fic: janus is trying to get close to patton for unsymp/manipulative reasons but then actually ends up falling for him - anon

Fell like we need some angst equality here! In other words, let's make Patton suffer a bit more, yes? - anon

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Warnings: manipulation

Pairings: moceit

Word Count: 3189

In his own words, Patton has never been a difficult person to manipulate.

He is trusting, he genuinely believes the best in people, and he cares too much about the well-being of others at the expense of himself. The first sign of a sniffle or a faltering smile and he’s there, all soft words and promises and ‘can I help?’

It’s almost insultingly easy. So much that Janus worries he’s being paranoid, that too many years of skulking in the shadows and thinking ten steps ahead is finally taking its toll, but no. No, Patton…Patton, for better or for worse—better for Janus, worse for Patton—lets him waltz right in.

Janus does know what he’s doing, thank you very much, so he doesn’t just rush in. No, no, he takes his time. Builds it up, slowly.

First, it’s just an off-handed look of surprise. He lets himself falter for a moment, just a moment, when Patton says something. He flickers the well-trained look of genuine shock across his features before he shakes it off and goes back to the traditional mask. He catches Patton’s gaze lingering on him for the rest of the conversation and the monster inside him purrs.

Come get me, sweetie.

After that, it’s stealing glances when he knows Patton’s looking-but-not-looking. A quick dart here and there, then a longer one. When he can tell Patton’s trying not to pay attention, he adds another, his gaze sweeping up and down Patton’s form. The tips of Patton’s ears are a little redder after that.

The monster rumbles when Patton gives him a chance to say what he thinks, despite the confused looks from the others. He plays it up, acts the bashful evildoer, hiding the smirk as Patton insists he wants to hear him.

Soon, the monster promises, you won’t have a choice.

It’s dangerous that Patton can surprise him, catch him off-guard, but when he asks Janus to have a cup of tea with him, Janus isn’t going to say no. They sit and Janus drinks him in, tilting his head this way and that with an unflinching stare as Patton babbles himself in and out of conversation topics. He’s adorable in an endearing shut-the-fuck-up sort of way, and yet…

The most genuine smiles reach all the way to your eyes, Janus has learned, and oh, do Patton’s eyes smile.

Janus’s do too, but not like that.

After that, well, Janus isn’t blind. He can see Patton’s attraction to him, it’s written all over that face. It’s in the hands that look like they’re itching to help him, it’s in the voice that lilts and jumps like a schoolgirl’s. So he lures him deeper, dropping crumbs of genuine affection, letting him think he sees light in the cracks of the mask.

He starts to spin the deeper web, about the true nature of growing up in the shadows, shunned by Thomas. Stories of being cold, oh so very bad for snakes, of being alone save for the manic screams of the dark parts of Thomas’s mind.

People love those types of stories.

Patton responds beautifully, taking every pause Janus gives him. He smiles and does the worst thing he could’ve done: offer his help.

It’s almost insultingly easy.

It’s why Janus starts to just show up instead of making Patton ask after his presence, waltzing into rooms from out of the shadows just to hear him make a noise of surprise or smile and say he wasn’t expecting him.

It’s why he starts to let Patton fuss over him, making sure he’s eaten, that he has access to food that isn’t contaminated by Remus’s experiments, or makes him sit down to watch the movie with the rest of them.

It’s why his smiles start to become more genuine because, oh, Patton, you’re making this so easy, to get close to you.

Then he starts to notice some problems.

When he shows up to see Patton, the smile that comes to his face is unbidden. He doesn’t calculate which of the ones he’s going to use today, it’s an instinctive response. Patton smiles, his cheeks squish up, his eyes widen a little, and Janus smiles back. Just like that.

Patton doesn’t need to ask him what he wants to drink anymore. He just…makes it. And Janus doesn’t raise an eyebrow and purr about how well-trained Patton’s memory is as he stares at him over the rim of the cup, he just…thanks him.

The babbling isn’t babbling anymore. They’re talking. Janus is still listening, but he’s listening now, he’s not just staring into space inter-spliced with well-timed quips or hums. He starts responding to what Patton says, starts asking him questions about what he thinks.

Only when the next meeting rolls around and Janus is entirely focused on Patton, not Thomas, does he realize that everything has gone horribly, disastrously wrong.

He’s miscalculated.

The monster inside him is still growling after Patton, but instead of one day, I’ll drag you to hell and make you watch everything burn, it’s become if anyone touches you, I’ll drag them to hell and listen to them burn.

When did it change?

He can’t remember.

Janus starts to pull away. He can’t have this. This is not what’s supposed to happen. This is not what the plan was. They can’t do this. He can’t do this.

He starts to skip tea time. He finds a reason to decline movie night. He spits a quip that he knows lands a little too close to home and smirks as his chest shrivels. One meeting he doesn’t look at Patton once and has to pretend he isn’t aching when he catches Patton’s gaze on him. He sinks out without a second thought.

Janus sits at his desk, tugging at the gloves on his hands.

No more.

He can’t do this anymore.

Thomas is the one he’s working for. He has to be. He has to keep Thomas alive, has to keep Thomas safe. Nothing is worth getting in the way of that. Nothing. Nothing.

Not even a bright smile and a gentle voice asking ‘can I help?’

Patton may be a lot of things, but he isn’t stupid. He knows the world is not an inherently kind place, no matter how much he wants to believe it, but he holds on to the fact that it could be.

He knows that he can’t accurately guess what someone wants all the time, knows that his want for the world to be good makes it harder to spot when people maybe aren’t. But sometimes, just sometimes, they are.

Patton tries, honestly, he does to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. He doesn’t know what goes on in their heads, there’s no way for him to find out that information, so he has to do his best with what he’s given. That means trusting them.

So when Janus starts to show interest in spending time with him, of course, he smiles and says he would love to. Janus is fascinating and so clever, Patton just wants to look. See how his mind works, how he thinks about things, how he is. It doesn’t hurt that he manages to make Patton feel completely exposed with nothing more than a glance, but it’s the soft smiles he sees hiding under that hat when Logan makes an excellent point or when Thomas stands up for himself that he’s hooked on.

But he’s not completely oblivious.

The one thing you can trust a dishonest person to do is to be dishonest.

He knows that when Janus accepts his offer to tea that it’s not that simple, but he satisfies his curiosity with the knowledge that Janus prefers a black tea, steeped for five minutes in water that’s just come off a rolling boil, one firm squeeze of honey, and a saucer to set the cup in.

He knows that when Janus looks to him in a conversation for back-up, the whole thing has been organized so that of course Patton will back him up. The way he constructs his arguments is, well, it’s immaculate. Even Logan has to admit he’s good. But he allows himself the small thrill of knowing he’s the one being looked at.

He knows that when Janus starts to come around more often, starts to talk more at their tea times, starts to smile like that, it means he’s getting close. And for a few moments, just a few, Patton can let himself pretend. Pretend that all of it is real, not just the joy he gets out of seeing Janus behave like this.

He doesn’t care that it’s probably an act, doesn’t care that Janus isn’t getting the same thing out of their time together as he is. If he can just make those moments a little easier, help Janus see he doesn’t have to be Deceit all the time, then that’s enough for him.

At least, that’s what he tells himself when Janus starts to pull away.

He misses tea time. Then movie night. Then he starts to ignore Patton again.

Patton swallows his tears and reminds himself that he has something. He has the memory of how Janus takes his tea, of the rare soft brush of gloved fingers he could get across his shoulder. He cherishes the surprised look on Janus’s face when he said that Janus could be who he wanted, that he didn’t have to perform if he didn’t want to.

He could just be Janus.

But Janus got what he wanted from Patton, so he doesn’t need to spend time with him to get it, whatever it was. So Patton takes a deep breath, squares his shoulders, shoves the ache to the very pit of his stomach, and smiles.

He goes back to just watching Janus from afar, and hopes whatever it is that he wanted made him happy.

He’s glad to have helped.

It’s early. The Mindscape is still half-asleep as Patton gets down to the kitchen. He sighs, rubbing the last of the sleep out of his eyes as he fetches the kettle from its place under the cabinet and fills it with water. He yawns and the last of the wake-up tears squeeze out of his eyes. He turns, sets the kettle to boil, and almost jumps out of his skin when Janus appears right next to him.

“Goodness,” he pants, his hand clutching his chest, “you startled me!”

Janus doesn’t say anything. Patton shakes his head and reaches into the cabinet.

“Would you like a cup of tea? I just put the kettle on so it shouldn’t take long to boil. We’re nearly out of honey, though, there should still be enough for you.”

Still nothing. Patton risks a glance over his shoulder to see Janus just staring at him. He does his best to turn and ignore it.

Janus keeps staring. How…how? How can Patton not—not—not react at all? Janus just stopped interacting with him at all, throwing him away like it was nothing, and here they are, Patton acting like it was nothing? That no time had passed, there were no consequences from the past too-long of Janus ignoring him?

He doesn’t manage to shake himself out of the stupor before Patton is turning back around with a perfect cup of tea in his hands, sliding it across the counter to him.

“Would you like breakfast?”

Janus finds himself nodding before he can catch himself. Patton smiles.

“I’m going to bake muffins,” he says, turning to start pulling out the ingredients, “do you have a preference on blueberry or cinnamon sugar? Roman asked for blueberry last night but he said it wasn’t a firm preference.”

Janus swallows the first sip of his tea and asks for blueberry.

“Wonderful, we’ve still got the frozen blueberries left over.”

When Janus doesn’t say anything else, Patton pauses. He turns back and carefully nudges Janus’s shoulder.

“Janus? Are you okay?”

Janus huffs. “Of course you would ask me that.”

“Yeah, Janus, you seem a little upset this morning,” he says softly, “can I—“

“Don’t say it,” Janus hisses, pinching the bridge of his nose, “don’t fucking say it.”

Patton hushes. He takes a step back, respecting Janus’s space, before he looks down. He drags his finger along the counter. A million questions burn the inside of his throat until it is scorched to a crisp. Can he help? Did something happen? Was it one of the others? Did he sleep well? Is something else wrong?

What he asks instead, though, is: “did it go away?”

Janus’s head jerks up and he fixes Patton with a stare. “Did what go away?”

“The thing you were using me to get,” Patton says, staring back at him, “did it go away?”

Janus’s heart stops.

His first thought is that Remus snitched on him. His second thought is that Roman said he was worried. His third thought is that he’s been too sloppy.

“W-what—“ he swallows— “what are you talking about?”

“What you were getting close to me for,” Patton explains like he isn’t making the pit in Janus’s stomach worse, “the thing that you wanted. Did it go away? Or did it run out?”

For long seconds, no one in the kitchen moves. Janus dares hardly breathe. His chest feels like it’s on fire and the tea resting in the pit of his stomach turns to ash.

Patton’s still waiting for an answer.

He looks away. “I didn’t get it,” he mutters, toying with his glove.

“Oh.” Patton shuffles. “Is that why you’re back?”

Yes. No. Isn’t it? No. Why not? That’s what all this was for. No. Come now, sweetie, don’t be so—

“No,” Janus blurts out, “no, that’s not—I don’t—I—I—“

“Whoa, hey, hey,” Patton says, holding out his hands, “easy, take it easy, I’m not mad—“

“You should be,” Janus spits, flinching away from Patton’s hands, “I used you. I manipulated you. I could’ve broken you. You should be mad.”

Patton takes a deep breath. Hearing Janus confirm it is one thing, hearing him confirm it like this is another.

“But I’m not,” he says softly, reaching out for Janus again, “I’m not mad. You, on the other hand, are hyperventilating.”

Oh. So he is.

It hurts when Patton’s warm hands land on his shoulders, coaxing him to breathe through his terror. It hurts when gentle fingers lift his chin to wipe away his tears as a soothing voice counts out his breaths for him. It hurts when after all of that, after all of this, Patton is still here.

“I didn’t get it,” Janus croaks, letting Patton’s arms steady him against the counter, “I didn’t get it.”

“Shh, shh, that’s okay. It’s okay, we can figure it out, you need to calm down, sweetheart—“

“No,” Janus manages, gripping Patton’s arms as tightly as he can, “no, I—you—I didn’t—I don’t want that anymore.”

Patton just blinks. “Okay. What do you want, then?”

What does he want?

He wants smiles and easy touches.

He wants babbling laughter and meaningless conversation.

He wants to look at someone and not have to look away, to feel his mouth turn up without needing to hide it.

He wants. He wants. He wants so badly.

Patton sighs lightly when he shoves some amalgamation of words out of his mouth. “Janus, you don’t have to do that. I’m already asking what you want.”

Something in Patton’s chest twinges when Janus’s eyes widen in shock. “What?”

“You don’t need to perform,” he says softly, “this is…touching, it really is, but you can just tell me what you want. I’m already here.”

He spots the moment Janus realizes what he’s saying and it would be difficult to say that the heartbreak in his expression isn’t as painful.

“If you’re telling the truth,” he says when Janus doesn’t reply, “then yes, you can have it. But it’s going to take time for me to give you.”

Janus just stares at him.

“You understand why this is hard for me, don’t you?” He fights the urge to wipe away the guilt and shame from Janus’s expression. “I want to believe you, Janus, I really do. But I wanted to believe you last time too.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know you are,” he murmurs, reaching up to adjust Janus’s hat, “and I told you, I’m not mad. But you have to let us work for this, okay?”

Janus searches his face. He wants to find a lie. He wants to find some resentment. He wants Patton to be angry.

He knows how to deal with anger. Knows how to weather the blows and the yells and that—that he understands.

He doesn’t know what to do with this.

But Patton is calling the shots now, so he nods. He’ll do it. He wants what he wants and he’s accepted he has no idea how to get it. Not like this.

Patton smiles.

After a moment, Janus smiles back.

It isn’t easy. They go back to meeting for tea. Just tea.

Then movie nights.

Then Janus starts to knock on Patton’s door and ask if he wants to go for a walk.

Then he starts taking his gloves off.

Patton holds himself back from asking to help when Janus looks a little uncomfortable, tries to restrain himself from saying Janus can do what he likes, he’s important. Janus praises him every time he asserts that boundary.

Sometimes Patton still feels like he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. For Janus to leave again. Or for those eyes to glaze over, that smile to turn to a cruel smirk. But then one night, when the voices in his head are very loud, Janus pulls him gently into his lap and hushes them, stroking the crown of Patton’s head as he croons softly that it’s alright, he’s here, nothing can hurt him. Patton cries into Janus’s shoulder that night and fear curdles in his chest.

There’s no going back now.

But in the morning, when he wakes up, it’s to ungloved hands cuddling him protectively against a strong chest, a chin tucked over his head and the blankets pulled snugly around them. He looks up and sees another sleep-slack face, lips turning up just a little into a soft smile.

Patton closes his eyes as he lets himself be lulled back to sleep by the warmth.

They’re not quite there yet. The burn of the betrayal still hurts. Hands still twitch and hesitate when they go to reach out for each other. Their relationship isn’t healthy, not by any standards that matter.

But it could be.

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#dragonbabbles #fic #sanders sides #patton sanders #sanders side fic #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit

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mimssides · 3 years

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D as in...: Part 4 - A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes

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___

Roman was a woman for a few days after the coming out. The third day after it he and Remus changed back in more masculine bodies and Roman confirmed that he was a man again. But his and Remus’s face were a little different now. Not quite drastically different from what the used to be but their facial features changed a little from day to day, the hair texture was curlier on one day than it was at another, and their heights and physiques varied a bit as well.

It took the others by surprise at first. The constant changes unsettled them a little, afraid that it might be a sign of unstableness, until Virgil pointed out that both of them used to jump from form to form on a daily basis when they were teens and that nobody had been bothered by it back then. After a little more deliberation behind the twins’ backs, the four settled on letting it slide and Virgil was happy enough with the result.

He didn’t want Roman or Remus having a bad time just because their appearance had started to change after a good decade of standstill, while he himself, as well as Janus changed on a rather regular basis even if not so extremely as the twins used to. And they looked so happy with it. Remus marvelled about every change and he started to wear dresses, crop tops, shorts no matter which form he had and Virgil had to admit that it suited the Duke quite well. The chaos fit him and truly seemed to make him content.

And Roman looked simply stunning. He had started wearing new jackets, different cuts for his pants, more formfitting with beautifully embroidered patterns and other little knickknacks, which made it hard for Virgil to keep his eyes away from Roman. His newly discovered crush only grew since this coming out and Virgil started to get desperate about what he was to do next.

It didn’t help either that the Prince apparently had made it his mission to get them into more one on one situations, which made it even harder for him to hide his crush. For heaven's sake, he didn’t even know if he was hiding anymore. Remus certainly had caught on judging by the looks he shot him, and Janus and Patton must assume something considering the glances they sometimes exchanged when he stumbled over his words when he was close to Roman. Maybe Logan was still in the dark but otherwise, Virgil was pretty certain that everybody had caught on.

Possibly, even Roman, which Virgil slowly started to suspect as well. Why else would he try to get in more and more one on one situations with him if not to force Virgil to confess his feelings? Why else he would have asked him three days ago to help him change up the furniture they had under their lime in the outdoors? Or why else would he have asked Virgil to read his script with him the other day?

Certainly not because he wanted to spend more time with him on his own or because he thought that Virgil’s creative input was of value.

No, Virgil was pretty certain it was a scheme to get him to confess his feelings.

But at least tonight Roman and he wouldn’t be alone together, as it was the sides’ movie night, and no that thought did not make him a little sad at all, thank you very much. At least that was the plan until dinner came along and Janus cleared his throat and got the others’ attention.

“It has been a taxing week; we had a lot of creative work done thanks to Roman. So, he definitely deserves a break, right Virgil?” the snake asked and looked over to Virgil with an expectant look.

“Yeah? I mean sure? Why would he not deserve a break?” Virgil said and felt the anxiety slowly enter his system.

The look in Janus’s eyes was far too pleased and Virgil wanted to add something to his answer but didn’t know what. And he realized quickly that it was already too late as the snake spoke up again and put a hand on Remus’s shoulder.

“Very well then! I’ll have you make sure that he does have a great time since I and Remus are occupied with other activities this evening and sadly cannot attend the movie night,” Janus explained and Remus frowned in confusion at his statement.

Yet before either Virgil or Remus could protest, Patton interfered and said while putting their empty plates on another: “I had thought about decluttering my photo albums. Maybe you could help me with it, Logan? You are so much better with organizing stuff than I am.”

“I will gladly help you with clearing out the albums but is there a particular reason why you want to this today?” Logan asked uncertain what exactly was happening right now.

Patton looked over to him and then to Roman with a gentle look and explained: “I just felt like doing it and well, I thought you might enjoy sometime with us off your case. And you unwind so well with Virgil these days, so there is that… But I’ll gladly join you if you want me to! And you’re free to do what you want as well, Logan. You don’t need to help me if you would rather watch a movie.”

Roman threw a questioning look from Patton to Janus why Logan still looked somewhat confused but replied: “I don’t care that much about movie night. It is a fine distraction and bonding activity but there are many other nights to come. Therefore, I figuratively don’t see any harm done by missing one night out.”

Patton smiled widely at Logan and got up from his chair to gather the rest of the plates and cutlery on the table. Virgil gaped at him and noticed how he exchanged a look with a far to satisfied looking Janus, before he passed behind him and Roman and put his hand on the Prince’s shoulder.

“Would that be okay with you then? Have a movie night only with Virgil?” Patton asked and Virgil wanted to speak up and protest.

But alas, before he could Roman shrugged and said: “It is fine with me. I like spending time with Virgil but I wouldn’t mind having you all around as well.”

As he spoke his glance drifted from Patton to Virgil and a small smile appeared on his lips. Instinctively, Virgil smiled back and almost forgot how frustrated he felt with Patton and Janus, until the former giggled a little and ruffled through his hair on his way back to the kitchen.

“Then it’s settled! You two have a fun night and Logan, I’ll get you when I’ve finished doing the chores in the kitchen,” Patton exclaimed and was gone to do the dishes.

And as Patton went, Janus stood up as well, grappling Remus right as the Duke wanted to ask what exactly this was about. With the softest tone Janus said pulling Remus behind him: “Very well then. We’ll have to set up the lounge for our activities. Have fun!”

As Janus walked away and had pulled himself and Remus into the hallway the three remaining sides heard Remus ask from far away: “You haven’t told me of anything you’d want to do, J? What the fuck is this about?”

Roman sighed and Logan just made a confused face, while Virgil buried his head in his hands. The fates had conspired against him and their names were Morality and Deceit. Powers far too mighty to win against.

___

About an hour later Virgil sat on the couch with Roman fighting about which movie they should watch. At least that hadn’t changed; They still bickered about which Disney movie was the best and why that was so.

After five more minutes of fighting Roman eventually gave in and proposed to watch The Nightmare Before Christmas. To that Virgil had no complains and the Prince threw the movie in.

Virgil sat in the corner of the couch while Roman sat in front of it, widely gesticulating and commenting at some scenes as he always did. During the songs he sang with the characters and even roped Virgil into humming along, maybe even quietly singing some parts with him. Virgil was sure he couldn’t hear that but he felt flustered nevertheless and the second half of the movie began he started to get a little restless.

Somehow, Virgil became more fidgety and was looking for the blanket Patton had always laying around in case somebody got cold. Apparently, his movements caught Roman’s interest and suddenly the Prince had turned around and watched Virgil curiously. Virgil stopped rummaging and crossed his arms over his chest, to which Roman only raised his eyebrows and stood up to sit on the edge of the couch.

“What is it, Jack Scare-ington?” Roman asked and Virgil sunk further into himself.

He mumbled a response, which Roman didn’t understand and inquired again: “What was that?”

“’m cold,” Virgil huffed and looked to the side.

He was ready to hear the mocking giggle from Roman, but instead felt how the blanket he had had been looking for was thrown in his lap. Confused Virgil turned to look over to him and saw how Roman had slid back on the couch and was now sitting next to him. He was looking at the screen as if nothing had happened, had there not been this treacherous little grin on his lips.

Quietly, Virgil wrapped himself into the blanket and continued watching the movie. Yet the effort to keep himself concentrated on the screen grew more and more as he noticed how he got a little warmer. Also, his eyes kept glimpsing over to Roman who somehow seemed to be absolutely comfortable in his t-shirt and shorts, despite it being a little chilly.

Or was it? Virgil pulled the blanket down from his chest and looked over to Roman with confusion on his mind.

“It’s almost sad how the Dads are trying to set us up, while they can’t bring themselves to sit together and have a little talk themselves.”

Virgil felt himself choke. Roman turned to look at him with an awkward grin, fumbling with his hands.

“Am I right?” Roman added with an airy laugh.

Somehow, the tone made Virgil ease up a little and he laughed a little awkwardly as well.

“Yeah,” Virgil agreed and shifted a little towards Roman whose smile immediately got brighter, “they’d rather get their shit together instead of trying to mess with our stuff. Like, neither of them is really good at it, right?”

“Yass, they’re both terrible at doing this! Which is a joke in itself.”

“Exactly! For someone with a “silver tongue” J’s dogshit at sweet talking Pat. Also, that excuse before was terrible.”

Roman laughed and put his left arm on the back rest.

“You are so right! And Patton isn’t doing any better. He is the heart and doesn’t manage to tell our incapable deceiver how he feels! It’s almost sad.”

Both giggled a little and Virgil leaned back against the couch. He then noticed how his head was touching Roman’s arm and how much closer they now were. Almost he pulled back in reflex, as he noticed how Roman watched the screen again, shoulders relaxed and face so soft.

They weren’t flirting. Not truly. This was close. Intimate and warm. And Virgil was safe. Safe to do or not do what he wanted. There was no rush, no pressure.

Just Roman, who was warm and soft and sat next to him, with a smile on his lips. And Virgil remained sitting close next to him looking to the screen and letting the story get to its end, while neither spoke but slowly but surely inched closer to the other.

The credits rolled over the screen and Virgil knew exactly which movie Roman would propose next.

“What about Cinderella?”

Virgil rolled his eyes but the smile on his lips betrayed him. With a mock annoyed huff, he told Roman: “Sure, if you really want to.”

“I’ll put the live action version from 2015 in then!” Roman said excited and jumped to his feet and put the Blu-ray in the player.

He then sat back next to Virgil and the movie started playing. He grew more tired with the minute and let himself lean against Roman, who did little but react. He felt how the Prince’s arm was put around him and felt quite content with that. The movie did not really interest him. Roman’s face, the glee and softness in it, though, they had him quite enraptured.

At some point he had placed his head on Roman’s shoulder and looked mindlessly at the screen, watching how this far too kind woman got abused and taken advantage of by this horrible stepmother and stepsisters.

On other days Virgil might have started to point out that that depiction of stepparents and stepsiblings was kinda harmful and dirty propaganda for “blood” family, which wasn’t a bad thing in it self but there were too many people who were hated by their own “blood” and found a lot better care in foster homes. But right now, Virgil did not care. He was warm. Because Roman was warm and comfy and he was allowed to huddle against his side and just be.

Virgil almost felt his eyes fall shut as Roman flinched a little and Virgil sensed his eyes on him. He yawned and then sat up a bit to look at Roman’s face. And as he blinked his eyes more awake, he saw the surprise and the little flush on Roman’s face, as the Prince stared at him.

With a frown Virgil scratched his nose and asked sloppily: “What is it, lover boy?”

Roman continued to stare at him, his face getting hotter and hotter as he pressed his lips together and watched Virgil in silence.

Well, in relative silence.

“You – you’re purring?”

Virgil blinked. And then he heard the noise coming out of his throat, which immediately stopped as soon as he realized it. He inched back from Roman, not entirely away but stared at him, knowing fully well that his face was probably beet red and was at once very aware of where his hands were, how quick he was breathing and how alive he was. Which was not helping to get himself more focused again.

“You purr sometimes then?”

Virgil gulped and let the question sink in. Now, it was somehow too late to defend himself and get out of the situation, so he might as well just clear it up.

“Uhm, so,” Virgil babbled, fidgeting with his fingers and staring at them, “yeah? Uh, you – uhm, you know how Emu can turn into an octopus? Or Pat into a frog?”

Roman nodded slowly and adjusted himself to face Virgil more properly.

“Like, we can all shapeshift into anything we want. Any animal and stuff, but some are just more natural to us? And I … I – If I want to turn in an animal and don’t focus, I’ll always end up as a cat. It’s like – like my thing, I guess?”

Roman continued staring at him for a few seconds before he gave a slow nod and gulped. Uncertain he commented: “I can get behind that. I – so, it also explains the hissing you do sometimes. That’s just… the cat getting through, I blatantly assume?”

“Not, not really,” Virgil said with a breathy laugh and cast his head a little more down, “it’s more of a thing I and Janus had going on? The whole hiss thing? I don’t know. It’s weird I never really got behind it. Cat behaviour normally, does not just slip into my usual behaviour.”

Virgil pressed his lips together and he pressed his chin close to the chest, hoping he could just disappear inside of himself.

“But… You were purring before…?”

Shyly Virgil glanced up to Roman. Into this stupid brown eye, which reflected the blue light of the TV and made him forget to overthink and worry for some minutes.

“That – that can happen, if I want it to happen or, uhm, if I’m tired and really, uhm, really comfortable.”

Roman blinked slowly and Virgil watched him visibly flush before he stuttered: “L-like a – a , ah, a sexy kind of comfortable?

“What?! No, just comfy! A normal, very unsexy comfortable. Very, very unsexy!” Virgil retorted stressed and saw a short wave of relief wash over Roman’s face before the Prince buried his face in his hands in shame.

Virgil let him remain in the pose for a moment, a little unsure of what to do next. He realized that they had barley moved away from each other. Roman was radiating heat, literally and once again Virgil felt the urge to ask why that was that way.

He didn’t get to ask as Roman said: “I apologize. That was awkward.”

Sheepishly Roman looked up again and Virgil shrugged with a goofy grin. Lazily, he leaned back against Roman’s frame, gently, with no force behind it.

“Thank god. Finally, I’m not the sole provider of awkward moments in here,” Virgil joked and saw Roman’s face light up and soften instantly.

And somehow, they slide back into a comfortable silence as the movie continued playing. The ball scene arrived and Virgil made an effort to watch Roman’s expression melt and his eyes glow with compassion and admiration. It was a little overwhelming how much Roman seemed to love this whole scene.

So, Virgil focused on the movie for a bit. Focused on the interactions between Cinderella and Prince Kit, seeing them gaze at each other, longing and interest in their gestures and words.

Maybe Virgil should ask a question after all.

“Can I ask you something now? About the movie?”

Roman pulled his eyes away from to screen and looked down to Virgil leaning against his shoulder, curiously looking up to him.

“Yes, of course,” Roman said.

“Why is it that whenever your first movie choice gets ignored you asked for Cinderella next? What about it makes you want to re-watch it constantly?”

A smile stole itself on Roman’s lips and his eyes drifted back to the screen as Ella got back home hiding her heel in the floor boards.

“I admire her hope.”

Suddenly, Virgil felt his breath being taken away.

“I admire her endurance and perseverance despite being treated horribly and unjustly. She choses hope and kindness and courage. I understand she is a victim; she has no means to escape her situation and maybe, probably, the writing team could have shown it better, executed it better, but I like to think she knew that too. She knew life was not kind and not pretty and that her father didn’t act smart and that her stepmother used him and her, because she was bitter and disappointed, and maybe also not perfectly written but I like the slight hint of humanity they give her in this version. I wish they had expanded on it more.

“But anyway, Ella is just so, so incredibly strong. So good. Her kindness and empathy are her strength and weakness and I like how she choses it over and over again. She hasn’t given up yet. Even when they lose the house, even when her dreams are taken away from her again, she choses to relish in the memory. To keep fighting, persisting in her very own way.

“Through her dreams and fantasy and her hope. If she hadn’t ended up with the Prince, if she had had to live a life under the strict hands of her stepmother, to me she would still be a great heroine, just for doing that.”

Virgil let those words sink in. Roman didn’t ask what he thought about it and Virgil was not going to answer on his own. He just mused over Roman’s view on strength, hope, courage and what role kindness seemed to play a role in it.

And as he mused, he nuzzled closer to Roman, who somewhere along the line placed his head atop of his and they remained like this for the time being. Virgil felt himself purring again, Roman’s hand lightly scratching over his back and even when the credits came the sat there a little longer.

It didn’t feel like an end. Neither did it feel like a beginning.

Neither knew what was there and as Virgil yawned again and stood up, they both didn’t want to say good night.

And yet, good night they said.

Virgil walked down the hallway, unsure of what to do and say next, just knowing he would have to do something. Because there was something between them, and while Virgil didn’t dare to think that it was a requited crush, he couldn’t help but hope that it could be.

And maybe. Only maybe. He needed to be the brave one here.

#sanders sides #roman sanders #virgil sanders #prinxeity #romantic prinxiety #movienight #D as in...#BBaW #eir writes #repost of an older work from my other blog #feel free to reblog

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marsupials-of-mars · 4 years

Photo

Janus shedding hcs! my favorite thing is giving Janus more snakey features, (largely because of my obsession with Snake Discovery on youtube…)

-Janus in blue! “In blue” means a snake is just about to shed, named after the milky blue color that their eyes turn. They’re also blind during that time which ties into the blind Janus hc that went around.

-Janus sheds ALL his skin, not just the snake half, however only that eye goes blind and really turns blue. this is based off the fact that scaleless snakes exist! look them up! They still shed their skin but the shed is thinner and kinda looks like when you let school glue dry on yourself and peel it off

-Another prior hc i love playing with is that Janus’s shed is like a period. He gets irritable and snappy and really uncomfy, so the others have to be really nice and they kinda do his bidding cause he’s scary when he’s pissed. also just cause they feel bad for him…

-Janus wears clothing what isn’t restrictive and has less contact with his skin. this is another reason he tends to hide away before he sheds: he doesn’t like dressing unprofessionally in front of the others.

-Janus rubs on things to help him shed. it does help that he has hands unlike a real snake so it’s a little easier but that also just creates a new problem, that being he is not tube shaped so getting a clean easy shed is super tough and takes a long time.

-Fresh shed Janus is also very uncomfy! His new skin is very sensitive so nobody gets to touch him, he has to ointment it up like a full body sunburn and usually ends up with a tub of ice cream sitting in the middle of his room floor trying to reduce contact with any surface. That lasts about a day.

-Remus steals the shed skin. Janus doesn’t want it so it doesn’t bother him, however he does wonder what he does with it. Does he wear it? Eat it? Just kinda hoard it to have around and admire? Only Remus knows. It’s stolen and never seen again.

-Janus has a post-shed meal. He doesn’t eat while he prepares to shed and shedding takes a lot of energy out of him, so he needs to refuel. I hc that Janus has a split lower jaw and a wide throat so he only eats occasionally (once or twice weekly a meal about the width of his waist) like a snake. This is why when Patton makes him come have family dinner with the others he just ends up sitting there awkwardly. I have a fanfic about Remus being oddly into how Janus eats and he often provides meals so he can watch, usually by slaughtering something. tbh, Remus “Monsterfucker” Sanders is really into most of Janus’s snakey features.

(bonus old Janus shed drawing under the cut! I drew him shedding more like a lizard back then)

#janus sanders #sanders sides #thomas sanders #remus sanders

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just-some-gt-trash · 4 years

Note

8. “There’s nothing like your smile, sort of subtle and perfect and real.” (Dear Evan Hansen) maybe with Loceit?

Wuuu, guess who’s back! Ima just drop this here, it turned out waaay longer than I expected, and I didn’t even include the prompt lol, anyways part two is on the way!

Enjoy!

_______________________________________________

Janus was tired, it had been a stressful week for Thomas and he was finally having a break, so all the sides could rest that day.

Roman, Remus and Patton had dragged Virgil and Logan for a picnic or something at the imagination, but Janus was able to slip out of it, between everyone going up and down and from here to there for the last couple of days, he hadn’t been able to shed properly, and he really needed to, his scales were bothering him, and they were really scratchy, but he had been suppressing it since he didn’t want the others to see him like that.

So there he was, alone on his room and letting all his snake features show, his arms, his eyes and his fangs, he could hide them most of the time, unlike the scales on his face, but since there was no one around there was no need to.

And now he was getting hungry, he groaned, not really wanting to go out since he was considerably weaker and he looked gross, but again, there was no one home, so a quick little trip to the kitchen wouldn’t hurt right? Janus forced himself to stand up and walk out of his room, he was walking slow with a blanket covering him, using it kind of as a cape, he wasn’t wearing his usual outfit, he was shirtless and only had pants on, he got down the stairs and walked to the kitchen.

The deceiving side opened the fridge and shivered, pulling the blanket closer to himself, how could he be cold and hot at the same time? He honestly didn’t question it anymore, it just happened, anyways, he grabbed some fruit and some juice, thinking that would do it for now, he was about to go when “Ah, Janus, I wasn’t aware there was still someone on the house”

A bit scared and surprised, Janus turned to look at where the voice was coming from, Logan, so he too had slipped out of the “family trip”, he used his extra hands to cover himself with the blanket, and looked away to hide his shedding scales “o-oh Logan, I most certainly knew you were here as well”

Logan walked to the pantry to get some bread “I’m just taking a brief snack break as well” he mentioned noticing the thing on Janus’ hands “Thomas may not be doing anything at the moment, but there’s still a lot of things I have to look trough” he appeared not to have noticed the other side’s current state.

“Y-yeah of course, go ahead, I won’t be at my room” Janus said just to start walking out of the kitchen quickly, or at least as fast as he could like this.

Logan noticed his slow pace and turned to look at him “Is something bothering you? You appear unwell, or at least out of you characteristic personality”

Janus didn’t stop walking “I’m fine“ he hissed slightly, feeling the lie going out of his lips.

The logical side hummed “I know you’re lying” he left his half-made jam and peanut butter sandwich on the counter and walked to stand in front of Janus “Your current appearance makes it clear that you do not appear in fact, fine, as you put it”

“It’s not of your business” Janus went to walk around Logan to be able to get out of the kitchen, but was surprised when he felt the other grabbing his arm “Logan, let me go”

He shook his head “I can assure you Janus, though it’s hard to tell sometimes, I am your friend, or at least I consider you my friend, and I’m only trying to help you, I’m concerned about you”

Janus blinked, he wasn’t expecting that coming from the logical side “I’m not shedding, okay? It’s not that big of a deal, can I g to my room now?”

“Shedding?” Logan asked curiously, raising an eyebrow “I was not aware that was something you needed to go trough”

Janus rolled his eyes pulled his arm back, being able to get out of Logan’s grip “That’s not because I’ve been hiding it at all” he then continued his way, not really wanting to go on with this conversation.

Logan didn’t do anything to stop him “Do you require any assistance?”

“I’m fine“ Janus insisted, once again noticing he was lying, but not really being bothered by it, he was able to go up the stairs and to his room, glad Logan left him alone.

After an hour or so, there was a knock on his door, Janus groaned, knowing it was probably Logan since the others were going to take longer on their little trip, he stood up and opened the door “What?”

“I didn’t mean to bother you, it’s just that I’ve been investigating for the past hour and I came to the conclusion that your current environment is not ideal for your shedding process” Logan spoke as he gestured to Janus’ room.

Janus raised an eyebrow and looked around “And according to you, what would ideal be?”

Logan took out a small notebook and started reading from it “First of, you need a place that’s around 70% humidity, and your room surely wouldn’t be able to get to that, secondly, we’ve all been under a considerable amount of stress during this last week, and it’s most likely that your shedding will be affected by that, a warm bath could help you get rid of the old skin easier and snakes tend to be timid about this and shed better when alone, so I’ll leave after making sure everything’s right”

Janus was actually surprised, he crossed his arms “Why do you care so much whether I shed correctly or not?”

“Ah, well, as I mentioned earlier, I consider you a good friend and have certain attachment towards you” Logan adjusted his glasses as he spoke “if you want a not feelings related reason, I’m just looking out for you to make sure every part of Thomas’ mind is functioning as it should and in perfect state”

Janus sighed “Fine, I’ll let you help, but my room is /definitely/ able to have those conditions”

Logan nodded “I am aware, and knowing all the places around the mindpalace, I would say the imagination is the ideal place since it’s easier to change at will”

“No” Janus replied “We wouldn’t need Roman or Remus for that and I can assure you I want them to see me like this” he thought for a bit “There isn’t a place, it’s not on the subconscious, where I used to shed before, you know”

“Alright...” Logan seemed a bit unsure about this “I suppose it wouldn’t be ideal to go there on your own, I would be more than pleased to go with you if you let me”

Janus shrugged “That’s kind of not the whole point” he grabbed Logan’s hand, not noticing the other’s slight blush “Ready?” Logan just nodded, still surprised about Janus’ move, at the positive reaction, he took a deep breath and sunk down with Logan.

#my writing #lexy writes #winter is so lovely #logan sanders #deceit sanders #logic sanders #sanders sides fic #not gt #prompt #loceit #janus sanders #sanders sides #ts sides #ts janus #ts logan

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greenninjagal-blog · 4 years

Text

Fool Me Thrice

Hey guys! My three day spoiler free band is up so now you guys get to see what I did immediately after that new video (FwSA) came out!

Summary: The aftermath of FwSA but Virgil was actually Janus in disguise the whole time. (featuring: Janus breaking down to tears and Roman being really confused.)

Word Count: 4734

Quick Taglist:@alias290 @chelsvans @coyboi300 @dwbh888 @glitchybina @faithfulcat111 @felicianoromano @harrypotternerdprincess @holliberries @jemthebookworm @killerfangirl3 @mrbubbajones @musical-nerd18 @nonasficcollection @stricken-with-clairvoyancy @the-sunshine-dims @themagicheartmailman @thenaiads @treasureofpriam @vianadraws @welovelogansanders

Read on Ao3 || My General Writing Masterlist

“DON’T TELL ME TO RELAX!” Janus yells, but the incessant bubbling in his stomach causes the edges of his lips to quirk up anyway. It’s a ridiculous, intoxicating feeling, and it’s curling around his insides like a snake coiling around its prey. He wants to smile. He wants to jump. He wants to sing.

But Virgil doesn’t do any of those things unless under threat and pressure and Janus has to keep-- he’s still pretending-- Janus is impersonating Virgil.

He’s not doing a very good job of it, and he knows. Ever since that stranger at the food court, that stranger who might be gay, that stranger whose name is Nico Flores and happens to write songs-- Ever since Nico uttered those silly, little words, and Thomas’s Heart and Creativity had swamped the controls, the more….intellectual sides were finding it hard to….think.

Everything’s fuzzy and blurry and Janus keeps trying to hit back that buzzing between his ears that comes every time that Roman and Patton team up and get lost in their contagious excitement. Virgil, certainly, is probably docile by now, flooded with the warm feelings that make it hard to panic over anything for at least another hour because he’s too busy riding that high of the “honeymoon” phase of dating-- before he remembers that it's possible that Nico might be a Serial Killer who lures his victims into relationships before slicing their throats and hiding their bodies in the woods.

He doubts that Logan’s having fun either: he hadn’t even bothered to show up when they had first spotted Nico across the cafeteria, not even to throw out that suggestion of saying “I see from your stickers we have similar interests. Let us discuss the possibility of future copulation now.” Which, of course, spells all sorts of troubles that Janus is going to have to fix later.

Later which seems to be now, because Thomas is jittery from the excitement flowing off of Roman and Patton and he is going to text Joan all about it which requires none of Janus-Virgil’s help.

It’s a flawless escape. Janus smiles inwardly, at the gooey feeling of pride in his stomach. He did it! One whole video, completely undercover!

It figures that Virgil would be the key.

Of all of them...well, Janus has always known Virgil the best. Anxiety and Self Preservation have gone hand in hand since Thomas was in diapers still. Janus grew up watching the curve of Virgil’s tense shoulders, watching the flickering of his eyes watching the entry points of the room, watching Virgil’s smirk curl and his eyeshadow bloom and--

And Janus knows Virgil hates him right now, even underneath the gooey layer of good feelings Patton is pumping through all of the Thomasphere. Janus even thinks that if he pops in to check on the little ball of nerves, Virgil will come back to his senses and start a murderous rampage on his way to stop Janus from ever impersonating any of them ever again. Which is definitely what Thomas needs right now.

Whatever. He can celebrate his victory privately.

Thomas is happy. That’s all that matters right now. The rest can wait until the good emotions in Thomas calm down and Janus can think clearly again: he’ll get out his fermented grape juice and pour it in a glass so he can feel fancy and then he’ll figure out how to deal with Logan, listen to Patton’s emotional-gushing-that-ends-in-overwhelmed-tears, entertain the Duke’s R rated fantasies with a polite smile, congratulate the Prince for his victory, and then after all that he’ll send Virgil a card via messenger dove to thank him for his...bravery.

And then he’ll go to sleep for two hours, and hopefully when he wakes back up Thomas will not be on fire.

That’s… that’s a reasonable hope, right? He’s not asking too much of the other idiot sides, right?

The buzz between his eyes sharpens for a second, as Thomas shakes his hands some more, with a grin that Janus would absolutely die for. It's almost regrettable because if anyone took a moment to look at him, to look at the way he looks at Thomas, they would see immediately what his weakness is: Janus is Self Preservation, Self Importance, Self, self, self.

He’s weak for Thomas’s smile. The gut force that drives Virgil to do things is protection, so he tries to make Thomas recognize everything as a threat; for Roman its creation, so he tries to push Thomas to achieve all of his dreams. For Janus it's Thomas’s id wants, so he does whatever it takes to keep him happy.

A smile on Thomas’s face means that Janus is doing good, that he’s doing right by Thomas. Who cares if in the end he’s the villain of the story? Who cares about him when there’s Thomas?

Thomas thanks him again-- actually he thanks Virgil, but Janus' face flushes anyway. The feeling in his stomach washes over him, leaving his knees weak and his lips smiling. Is this what being giddy is? He suddenly understands, suddenly, why Patton subscribes to that whole “Thomas is morally and objectively the best” philosophy; It’s a nice feeling, even if it makes it hard for Janus to concentrate on keeping Virgil’s eyeshadow the right color.

Thomas rushes by him-- almost close enough to touch again and wow Janus’ hands were still tingling from that; He forgot that Virgil was always able to touch their host-- and runs up the stairs to go scream in a pillow and text Joan the brilliant news and Janus takes that as his cue.

Time to wrap it up and go. (to sleep. Oh god, he can hear his bed calling for him already.)

But when he turns back to the last side in the room, Roman is pressing his knuckles to his lips and staring at the blinds in Thomas’s living room like he can set them on fire with his mind.

“Princey?” Janus asks, his own smile slipping. “What’s up?”

Roman snaps over to look at him-- to look at Virgil, whom he trusts and likes and appreciates and who is definitely not Janus at all. Despite that, the way that Roman is looking at him with furrowed eyebrows that would sing of a scowl if Patton had been doing his job just slightly not as well as he is currently, forces Janus to check to make sure he’s still wearing Virgil’s appearance.

“I can’t figure it out,” Roman says, looking like he just caught his best friends in the middle of decorating for his surprise birthday party. “Why?”

Janus squeezes his eyes closed trying to focus on what Roman was talking about. He knows that he missed at least one thing that was said in the hullabaloo all day, but he didn’t think it was something that Roman of all sides would be upset about. Why, what? Roman got the guy. What was so complicated about that?

Actually asking why is more on brand for Virgil.

For a ridiculous second Janus wonders if that was Virgil wearing Roman’s outfit and pretending to be him the way that Janus was pretending to be Virgil. But Janus is decently sure that Virgil can’t resist insulting Janus for more than five seconds at a time, and they’ve been side by side for hours now.

(And hadn’t that been nice? If Janus had just closed his eyes, he could have imagined the grateful smile Roman had given Virgil had been meant for him.)

“I don’t know what you’re on about, Ro,” Janus shrugs. “But I’m gonna go. All these good emotions are like...disgusting.” He sticks out his tongue that way that he’s seen Virgil do every time that Thomas has to eat the carrots his mom put on his plate just to sell the act, but Roman’s jaw sets.

“Why did you do that?” Roman bursts out before Janus can get all the way out, “Why? Janus!”

Janus should have run then, should have pretended that Virgil hadn’t heard him at all and let the other sides argue with each other, but his name is so new and shiny and no one ever uses it. The words vibrate through the air like needles and the next thing he knows is that he’s pinned in place, frozen, and Roman is looking very not-happy anymore.

Ha, so he knew. Looks like Janus can’t get through a video without being outed.

“I know it's you, you slimy snake,” Roman says. “Will you stop wearing Virgil’s face already! I want an answer!”

Janus’s tongue flicks in his mouth, rolling over the back of his teeth as he tries to think of the best way to handle this when all of his thoughts have to process through the molasses that is the gooey happiness Thomas is feeling and his own exhaustion.

“I have no idea what you mean,” Janus says, as blase as he can make it.

Which is….maybe not his best idea. The buzzing in his head makes the rest of the room go blurry for a second, in and out of focus and it’s so very helpful.

Roman’s face goes red, stuck somewhere between being angry and being insulted. He reaches out and Janus’ legs do that thing where they don’t work so when he throws his weight back, away, out of reach, his body goes plummeting to the foot of the stairs as well.

Roman yelps, leaning forward for a moment maybe with the intent to help him back up but Janus throws up a hand to stop him before he knows for sure. His eyelids are heavy, he realizes, and he’s tired and he really doesn’t want to have a fight with Roman right now.

“I had fun, Roman. Thank you for the... entertainment this evening.” He says, dropping the last of his stellar Virgil impression. He wonders how long he had Roman fooled, if he had him fooled at all for any point. Does he dare wonder how many of those smiles were given knowing that it was Deceit in disguise?

(He doesn’t and he resents the implication that he cares what the others think of him.)

“Congrats on wooing the boy or whatever.” Janus climbs back up to his feet and brushes imaginary dust off his tunic. Or it could be real. He’s not sure considering that he’s so tired he can’t see anything in front of him.

“You fiend!” Roman snarls, “What did you do to our Stormcloud?”

“Why don’t you go find out?”Janus suggests, with a half-assed flourish, even by his own standards, “Or better yet, don’t. In the meantime, I’ll be in my room.”

But Roman snags his arm and holds him up and Janus is acutely aware that sinking out with another side is troublesome and takes so, so much focus and energy. (And Romans touch is scalding. It’s burning. It’s white hot and Janus wasn’t aware he had been freezing before.)

“I’m tired of this game, Snakes and Ladders!” Roman says. “Tired of not knowing what you’re up to! Tired of not knowing what Thomas wants! Tired of getting backseat to self care and morality and-- and I’m Tired, Janus! Why do you keep doing this to me?!”

And hooooooo, does that strike something in Janus! The soft feelings in his chest burn right up in an anger he hadn’t even known he had been feeling. But it must have been there for a while because it boils right through him, leaving his chest smoldering and his mouth tasting like ashes.

“You think you’re tired?” He snaps, burns, blazes. There’s something in this throat, and it makes every word catch fire when it comes out of his mouth. And even Roman has enough sense to know that fire is dangerous and that he’s going to be cremated if he doesn’t step back.

“You think you’re tired,” Janus repeats, taking a step forward so that they’re nearly toe-to-toe and he can see the way that Roman’s Adam's apple bobs. “What about me, Roman? Don’t you think I’m tired? That I’m exhausted? That I know I’m going to have to sink back down and figure out what is wrong with Logan and listen to Patton and keep Remus busy and make sure that none of you morons overpower the others and drive Thomas directly into the ground? That I haven’t slept a full night since the whole start of these videos and moral dilemmas and whatever else? Every time I turn around Thomas is making another lie: to his friends, to his family, to himself! Don’t you think that I… that I…”

Roman is staring at him.

Janus’s head pounds. The room around him sways and he thinks that maybe...maybe the reason he can’t think straight right now doesn’t actually have anything to do with Patton’s elation keeping Thomas busy.

“Oh,” Janus says because he blinked and now he’s on the floor.

He blinks again and Roman is right next to him, looking concerned-- how ridiculous. Roman being concerned for him. Ha.

“Janus…” Roman’s voice is low, which makes Janus aware suddenly that everything else had been so loud all this time. He grits his teeth when Roman waves a hand and magics up… what are those, tissues? Why would he--

Oh.

Janus is crying. He reaches a hand up tentatively rubbing away the tears, and has to swallow a laugh. Oh, he's crying. When was the last time he cried? When was the last time he cried in front of someone else?

He's so, so tired. And that's the reason-- the only reason, mind you-- that when Roman scooches closer, a centimeter, an inch, a foot, and then rests his hand on Janus' shoulder, Janus doesn't push him off and immediately sink out to his room. It takes too much energy to lock a room, even his, from the others and Roman would surely follow after him and demand answers.

Roman’s touch is a shaky, changing warmth. Janus noticed it earlier when Roman had said the word “Bravery” and Janus hadn’t been able to form an actual response because he was so busy wondering if this was how all touch was supposed to feel. But now he thinks he can count every single atom that is touching him and the awareness hums in his veins in a way that shouldn’t be possible.

He sucks in an equally shaky breath and tries not to look like he’s leaning into the feeling. His stomach rolls around, twisting and churning to the point where it hurts. He might be able to blame this on a stomach bug. The other sides probably wouldn’t look farther than that. They don’t like him enough to look farther than that.

“Janus,” Roman says again, calling him by name and Janus wants to tell him to stop. He sounds like he cares and Janus knows it’s a lie. He thinks it’s a lie. He’s pretty sure it’s a lie.

It’s hard to tell right now, especially when his own inner desire is yearning for it not to be. He can’t trust himself when he’s like this. He always ends up doing something stupid.

Like sitting at the foot of Thomas’s stairs crying in front of Roman.

“Fuck,” Janus says, and laughs, like this was part of his grand master plan that definitely exists. He ignores the tissues Roman places at their knees and uses the back of his palms to get rid of those pesky, unprofessional tears. “My most humble apologies, my dear prince. Too much fun today I suppose--”

“Janus,” Roman cuts him off, and Janus wishes his sharp inhale was a little less noticeable. “Are you… Did….”

Janus can feel how Roman’s thumb is rubbing his shoulder, slow circles like a loading screen while he tries to weave together a sentence that makes coherent sense.

“Why?” Roman decides. “Why are you...why did you help Thomas meet Nico? Why did you force him to do it naturally without any lies? I thought you liked when Thomas tells lies!”

Janus snorts, which is a bad decision because his nose is runny and, god, now there’s snot all over his face, which just makes the lump in the back of his throat grow larger. He snatches up the stupid tissues and tears open the pack.

“I don’t--” Janus wipes away the snot, and tosses the tissue into oblivion. “I don’t want Thomas to lie all the time. Do you think I’m crazy, Roman? I have to manage every lie Thomas tells himself! It’s… It’s… imagine if you had to make a new video script every single day.”

Janus can see Roman’s confused look. It's adorable really, like a puppy that just got told to “Stay.” He recognizes that Janus is saying something, that Janus is talking to him, but the full meaning of the words is lost on him.

“If it's so taxing, why do you do it, then?” He asks, like it's some sort of choice and not his job.

“Why do you make video scripts? Why do you help Thomas practice his lines? Why do you take him on daydreams when he’s bored?”

“Because he asks me to,” Roman answers without a single hesitation. “Wait….”

Janus leans forward pressing his chin to his knees. His eyes close for a moment, two, three while Roman struggles to understand what Janus isn’t blatantly saying.

“Imagine if Thomas asked you to make a new video script every single day. Do you think you could say no to that?”

Roman makes a wounded noise from deep in the bottom of his soul. It resonates in the air between them, like an elephant neither of them wants to admit is there. Janus breathes in deeply, and wards off the fresh round of lovely wonderful tears that come from his lovely wonderful headache.

“I’m sorry about the court case, Roman,” Janus says. The words feel dangerous, like throwing knives and Roman flinches back, leaving the spot on Janus’s shoulder painfully freezing. “I wanted-- I wanted Thomas to do what he loved. I wanted him to stop lying about wanting to go to the callback and I thought that if I just made it so that only you could make the decision it would be easier! I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

Janus breathes in, but somehow it seems that all the oxygen in the room had dissipated without their knowledge. He gasps a few times, trying to get a steady rhythm back but the white noise in his head and the itch behind his eyes keep throwing him off.

There’s laughter-- it takes him a moment to realize it's his own. Which is just great, just fantastic, just what he needed. He finally got the sordid apology out and now he’s laughing.

But Roman is looking at him not with a scowl, but with some other emotion Janus can’t quite name through his blurry vision. For a second he thinks it might be fear-- which is even more funny than the idea that Virgil had been pretending to be Roman this whole time. In the safety of Thomas’s apartment, when Thomas had just gotten the boy of his dreams, when Janus was on the ground out of secret agendas to hide, what is there for Roman to fear?

“I just--” Janus gasps one more time, ignoring the sharp pain in his chest. “Thomas deserves a win. You deserve a win. That's why I wanted to help with Nico.” He feels like his head is going to pop right off. Maybe if he asks nicely Roman will get out his sword and do it free of charge and relatively painlessly.

“So I...ha, so I spent all day playing dress up,” Janus hates the wobble in his voice. “And now I’m a day behind on managing all my work and now Patton’s going to want to talk about what happened today, and someone needs to listen to Remus and Logan is obviously not doing too well so I have to check on him-- and Virgil too even though Virgil will probably throw something at me but I have to….And then Thomas is going to need me and I have…. I have to…”

“You really… you really do all that?” Roman says in a small voice that doesn’t suit him at all. “All by yourself?”

“Well, it’s not like there’s anyone else to help, Roman.” Janus says before he can stop himself.

“I’ll help you!”

Janus freezes. Because, well.

He’s heard those words before, hasn’t he? Not all that too long ago. When the divide between dark and light was more defined and Thomas hadn’t started posting videos with them in it and Janus wasn’t afraid of the purple door in the middle of the hall.

He knows how this conversation goes all too well.

But Janus apparently can’t learn any new tricks because he still says, “No, I can do this myself.”

(“You’ll kill yourself from stress, Jan!” Virgil had yelled. “Then where will we be?”

“I have everything under control, Virgil! I don’t need any help! Just drop it, okay?”

“Thomas and the Light sides are running you ragged and you want me to pretend like it isn’t hurting you? Are you crazy? They need to stop lying so much!”

“No! I can handle this!”

“Janus!”

“Virgil!”

“I can’t let you keep doing this,” Virgil had said, “If you won’t do something I will.”

“Don’t you dare!”

But he had. And now he was a light side, an accepted side, everyone’s favorite side. And he was slowly convincing Thomas to stop lying by turning Janus into something to be feared and avoided. How quaint. How trademark.)

Roman is staring at him. Janus can feel the weight of his eyes on him, and somehow that's worse than his hand on Janus’ shoulder. It’s heavier. It’s harder to just shrug off. It means something more.

Because Roman isn’t talking. And Janus isn’t hiding.

And if the words weren’t so hard to say, he thinks that maybe Virgil was right, and he should apologize.

“Huh,” Roman says after the silence threatens to swallow them both. He clears his throat and mercifully looks away, staring at that painting over Thomas’s couch. “I didn’t think you were stupid.”

Janus hisses at him, at the idea of him. But Roman flicks his fingers.

“Oh come on, Ouroboros,” Roman says. “You handle all of Thomas’s lies, and then you’re out there looking after each of us sides as well? I think after 31 videos we can all agree that one side being entire in control of Thomas is a bad thing! So why are you still trying to do everything?”

Janus has a very good answer. The best answer.

But Roman’s elbow reaches out and nudges him and all his thoughts scatter into the air. Maybe that was intentional, but Janus can’t find the energy in himself to really be angry about it.

“I…” Janus says, “I just want Thomas to be happy.”

“So do the rest of us too, Snakecrates!-- Get it? Like Socrates?-- Not gonna lie, your way to make him happy is truly… the foulest of methods, but at the end of the day we’re all a part of him.” Roman says. “Maybe instead of trying to puppet master this you could...try working with us? Like showing up as yourself instead of using Virgil’s or Logan’s face again?”

Janus snorts again. The backs of his eyelids shoot bright red stars across his vision. “As if. None of you would listen if I did things that way.”

Roman nudges him again. “It's just a suggestion, Slitherous Snape.”

“How many of those do you have?”

“Nicknames?” Roman pauses, and Janus guesses that he’s counting on his hand. “Dunno. A lot. I never get to use them because you show up in someone else’s clothes and I don’t realize it’s you. All the more reason you should listen to me and just show up as your usual self!”

Janus must have made a noise, but his brain is too preoccupied with the fact that the carpet in Thomas’s apartment is actually really comfy and if he buries his head in his knees the room is actually dark. His headache is a dull repetitive thob, like a drum beat that if he doesn’t focus too much on becomes a noise he can fall asleep to.

“I thought you hated me.” He admits, in a quiet tone and only partially hopes that it was too low for Roman to hear.

“Fool me once,” Roman says in a soft tone, humming like it's a melody. “Shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me thrice…”

He sighs deeply.

“And I think that means we need to actually think about talking out things like adults.” Roman nudges him again, and then places his arm around Janus’s shoulders. “But not right now, when you’re half dead from exhaustion. Let’s get you to your room, Jan.”

There’s a cold feeling around both of them, washing over Janus’s muscles like a flood, as they sink down. His eyes open briefly just in time to make out his own room surroundings before Roman drops him on his bed.

Oh, it’s really comfortable. Has his body always sunk into his mattress like this?

“Get some sleep, Deceit,” Roman says.

“Wait... Logan…” Janus definitely does not whine.

“I’ll handle the nerd.”

There are so many reasons why that’s a bad idea-- Janus knows there are a bunch of reasons because he wrote them down on flashcards to study in between grieving Virgil leaving the dark sides and managing the lies Thomas tells day to day and the ones he had going on forever and the ones that sides told each other and--.

But before he can say any of that, Roman sifts a gentle hand through his hair and Janus loses the ability to think again.

(Janus really doesn’t remember when Roman gained that power.)

He curls up almost unintentionally on his bed, and Roman makes a noise that could have been a laugh, if Janus cared enough to check.

“Sweet dreams,” Roman says softly.

“W…wait!” Janus gathers the last bit of his energy, the residue from the gooey feelings Thomas was harboring, and surges after Roman before he can leave all the way. “How did you... know it was me? And not…”

“Virgil?” Roman offered. “You kept messing with the eyeshadow, Janus. He has that angsty charcoal color on twenty-four-seven. You kept changing it to purple. I mean I liked it, but that’s not his style.”

Janus frowns. “No….he has the purple when he’s happy. I know he has the purple… He only started wearing the black...when he was trying to freak out Thomas.” He sighs and settles back into his pillow. “It glows...when he’s happy…”

Janus has plenty of memories about that, too. They were some of his favorites: Virgil on Christmas morning when the prospect of presents was more scary than the idea of all Thomas’s relatives coming over, Virgil on late nights watching cryptid history shows with Remus and talking about marrying Mothman when Thomas got older, Virgil right after he first appeared to Thomas, glowing in all senses of the word because their host knew who he was.

Janus remembers being a little upset when Virgil covered it up, because it was another lie then: Virgil was hiding part of who he was and the three of them had always agreed on no lies between them.

Besides Virgil had always looked younger with the purple, looked more happy, looked more approachable. He looked like he was excited to see Janus and not like he would rip out his throat if they ended up in a room alone together.

Virgil was purple long before he had been black, and Janus thinks he might have been in love with him even before that too.

Who had he been talking to, again?

Janus gets the distinct feeling something is wrong, but his pillows are comfy, and his mattress is soft and he’s been running on fumes for far too long. He’s fast asleep before he realizes that Roman is still in his room, frowning, and wondering if that meant Virgil had never actually been happy around the Light Sides at all.

#sanders sides #Au #Janus Sanders #Roman Sanders #virgil sanders #crying #sleep deprivation #Oh god Janus is so tired guys #touch starvation #TS Spoilers #fwsa spoilers #Roman has no clue what he's doing here #anxceit #angst/comfort #then angst again #I'm only kinda sorry about it #Hey have you guys heard my new hc #for why Virgil and Janus can't stand each other #Janus is a workaholic

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mysanderssidessideblog · 3 years

Text

A Good Day

Warnings for Sides fading out, major character death, unsympathetic Patton, angst, gaslighting, not a happy ending.

Written for #UnsympAndAngstSidesBingo

Link to AO3

“I'm very disappointed in you kiddo.”

Janus looked up from his book, frowning.

True, he knew his occasional appearance in the Lightside was not exactly welcome, but he had been slowly trying to help the others acclimatise to his presence by sitting quietly with a book from time to time.

He'd even carefully set out a tea set and biscuits this time, rather than his usual tea for one, making a subtle gesture that he was open to company. So far, none had taken him up on the offer.

Yet, he could not fathom source of Patton's discontent. He was trying, and short of dragging Virgil out by his ear to reluctantly sit with him, he was not sure what more he could do.

“Patton. Will you not join me?” Janus had learnt that the use of the word 'not' had evolved to ambiguous meaning; 'I could care less' tended to be treated the same as 'I could not care less', even if the wording was inaccurate. As a result, he leaned heavily into the word to help mask his lies.

“No.”

Morality's face, usually lit up with a bright smile, was stern.

Janus pursed his lips, and feigned indifference. “As you like.”

“You had one job, and you have failed.”

That took him aback, Patton not usually so confrontational. lowering his book, Janus schooled his expression into neutrality, opting for addressing the accusation in a calm and civil manner. He inclined his head so that he appeared interested in what Patton had to say, while opening his stance to appear receiving to discussion.

“I am not sure I follow. Please, help me understand.”

“You were to keep the undesirable elements of Thomas hidden, secret. You were supposed to stay away, out of sight, out of mind.”

“Ah.” Janus straightened, and clutched at his book, trying to hide the hurt from his voice. He had thought he and Patton had reached something of a truce, that Patton had seen that he had some merit in being known, in being active participant in the mindscape.

“I believe we agreed that repression was not of benefit. That I could keep things hidden, but it would be best for Thomas to be more self-aware, to learn that he had sides to him that were not always...” Janus struggled for an appropriate word, “...good.” he finished lamely.

It was hard to argue with Morality; he held great power and influence, and his view of the world was parsed down into good and evil. Janus sought to teach him of the deeper complexities, but Patton was reluctant to even consider than lying could have small benefit in theory, so the idea of applying small untruths to day to day happenings was unthinkable to him.

“It is not working. Thomas is more stressed than ever with so many conflicting opinions, and then there is Remus! He is disgusting, and vile, and Thomas does not need him and his corrupting presence!”

“And don't think I have not noticed Logan's more regular angry outbursts. The influence of the dark sides has gotten out of hand, and must be corrected.”

Janus was glad of his gloves that hid how white his knuckles had turned with how tightly he held the book. He swallowed nervously.

“Patton, I understand that this is a time of change, and that change can be daunting, even uncomfortable. However, change is important for growth, for improved insight. This will help Thomas become a better person, eventually.”

“Thomas was already perfect before the dark sides came along! Things were better before!”

Patton's face then broke into a smile.

Janus did not like that smile, not in the slightest.

“Maybe that is answer.....”

He was about to get to his feet, about to retreat, when Patton walked towards him.

“You could not keep the dark contained.” he said, as the air around them grew dense. Janus felt uneasy, as Patton's eyes narrowed behind his glasses. “So I guess it's a father's duty to step in when a Kiddo has failed....”

Janus did try to get up then, but found himself held down by Patton by a hand upon his shoulder, surprisingly strong.

“You'll help me, won't you Kiddo? Help me fix up your little mistake...?”

“I don't understand Patton, what are you talking about?”

“You, and Remus, all the dark sides, are a bad influence on Thomas.” Patton then stretched his lips wider, his face a rictus parody of a smile, “It's high time someone did something about that....”

Janus shook his head. “Patton, you cannot just deny that Thomas has dark sides to him, same as everyone! We are just as much a part of him as you are!” he lifted his hand, tried to push Patton from him. He could not make Patton's hand budge at all.

“Thomas needs us. Needs all of us!”

Patton's grip shifted, instead of holding Janus down, curling his fingers past the fabric and into the flesh underneath, so tight Janus felt like Patton was reaching to leave fingerprints upon his bones.

“No. Thomas needs to be good.” Patton gave a short nod to himself. “Thomas will be good.”

Janus cried out, in pain, in fear.

“Let me go!”

“I can't do that Kiddo. See, if I'm gonna make everything right again, I'll need to borrow just a tiny bit of your power.”

“You can hide things, and I have high influence over nostalgia and memories. I think that if we really put our minds to it and work together, we can hide the memories of the dark sides so deep that they will never be thought of again!”

“Patton, Thomas needs all aspects of him. He needs to understand that others have the capacity to lie so he is not taken advantage of. He needs the ability to get angry when things are not right so he can sort it out.” “He even needs Remus, the core of his jokes that are a little crude, a little naughty....” “You cannot just.... delete those vital pieces of him; that way lies madness!”

“You are one to talk about lies mister!”

“OK, OK, I have lied, and will likely do so again, but you have been told that repression doesn't work... that didn't come from me, but Logan. And you trust Logan, right?”

Patton tipped his head, thoughtful.

“Hmm. Good point.”

Janus sagged slightly, relieved he had managed to get through to Morality.

“I guess we'll just have to remove the the dark sides entirely!” he said brightly.

Janus froze, unbelieving. If it had been anyone other than Patton, he'd have accused them of a off-tone joke..... but Patton wasn't lying.

“I will help you!” he snarled, shaking his head, the lie unsubtle and obvious.

Tutting, Patton looked down.

“If you are not part of the solution, then it seems to me you are part of the problem...”

Patton's hand clawed, and Janus felt something creak within his shoulder.

He felt Patton tug at his influence, and thrashed and fought to keep what he was whole. He hissed and bore his teeth as if he might bite.

The hand across his throat stilled him, surprised, shocked that Patton would do such a thing.

“Stop fighting me, I know what's best for Thomas.”

“I will not help you destroy the dark sides!”

Patton's grip, both on shoulder and throat tightened in irritation. Janus struggle to fight back, to even draw breath, but Morality held much more sway than he did, and he could not break free.

He struggled, cursing himself for dismissing Patton as native and weak. Janus knew he was merely stalling for time, that Patton would eventually win. There was a small hope that one of the others might happen upon them and intervene, but he was not well liked, and he did not trust that another side would not work with Patton against him.

Patton looked down over his glasses, considering, and Janus desperately tried to stop Patton from draining his power, his essence.

Patton's grip round his throat relaxed, and Janus drew desperate and painful breath.

It took him a moment to realise that Patton was stroking against the side of his neck, affectionately. “You have an affinity for self-preservation, yes? Give me your power, willingly, and I shall let you survive.”

His mismatched eyes widened as Janus took in how very serious and set on this course of action Patton was.

Terror gripped him as the fingers round his neck tightened again, and he feared for his life.

A better side would have stood up for what was right.

A stronger side would have fought harder.

A clever side would have found the words to make Patton reconsider.

But Janus was a selfish side.

Weakly, he nodded.

Janus tried to cry out as Patton syphoned his strength and his power, but he could only hiss which what remained of his breath. His gloves and cape leached their colour, turning dull and grey as Patton stole from him.

He did not hold out much hope that Patton would ever return what he had taken.

When it was done, Patton released Janus, standing tall and confident, radiating energy.

“You made the right choice. Well done kiddo.”

Janus, sagged in the chair, tired. He managed to bring his head up to look at Patton.

“Patton, wait...” he managed to say, each word needing so much effort to utter than before, lie or not, “Please take a moment to think.. to reflect... You would be interfering beyond your realm of expertise. Do not do this!”

“Oh my silly little snake!” Patton leaned down to plant a fond kiss upon Janus's forehead. “It's already done!”

“What? No!” Janus clutched at the chair, as if it might hold him steady against this new revelation.

“All those nasty bits that Thomas doesn't need are already disappearing from thought. If you wanted to say your goodbyes, I would hurry. They are fading fast.”

One thought came to mind.

“Remusssss!” he hissed, and with a lurch, Janus swung himself downwards, sinking through the floor.

He landed in a landscape in disarray, the features of the darkside twisting and fragmenting, everything coming apart.

Remus was there, trying to shore up a crack in the wall with what looked like a mix of blood and cement.

“Snake-butt! Something's happening. Something's wrong!” he hollered over the low groan of the mindscape rejecting the dark.

Janus looked about in despair, only to see Remus staring at him, the crack beyond repair and stretching out. Horrifically, Janus could see the crack behind Remus, as the darker creativity grew translucent and hazy.

“My head feels fuzzy like mould on a birthday cake, and what's up with you? You've gone all grey.”

“It's Patton, he is not unmaking the dark side!” even in desperate times, Janus could not speak truthfully.

“What does that even mean?!”

Remus's voice was strange, softer as if he was shouting from a distance, but that did not hide the fact that he was scared. Janus could not ever recall Remus sounding scared.

Janus looked to him, halfway transparent and afraid, and the surrounding walls crumbling apart.

He forced a smile.

“Everything will be all right.” he lied, as he reached over and wrapped his arms round Remus, so the other would not see the tears in his eyes.

The sounds of unmaking crescendoed about them, and then, grew quiet.

Remus, and the darkside, and all that it contained faded to black... no, not black.....

Nothingness.

*********

Janus had had to claw his way back from the nothingness, drawing on what little power he had left.

He shouldn't have made it, should have faded out with the rest, but Morality's promise of his own unworthy survival held true.

The effort of returning to the lightside caused him to stumble, and he landed gracelessly in the common area.

Logan, writing down something in a note book, looked up. He gave curt nod.

“Janus.” he acknowledged, and then returned to his writing.

“Logan!” Janus hissed out, struggling to his feet.

Logan looked again, and adjusted his glasses at the sight of Janus bereft of his usual colouration.

“You have a new outfit. It is... monochromatic.”

“Do not summon the others. It's not important!”

Logan frowned, “If it is of such little import, then why can you not do it?”

Hands clenched weakly at his sides, Janus swayed where he stood.

“I can!” he lied, and then cursed himself for not speaking clearly as Logan stood back expectantly.

It did not take long for Logan to realise that Janus was making no move to call the others to them.

“Oh. You are lying.” Logan's lips tightened, “Very well.”

Roman rose with a flourish, and Virgil popped up sitting on the stairs.

“Patton has not done something terrible!” Janus started, then caught himself. He took a breath.

“Patton has done something terrible. He has destroyed the darkside, and all those still connected to it.”

Virgil frowned in thought, “I thought I felt something weird... ”

“Or it could have just been your usual constant worry of something about to go wrong.” Logan reminded, to which Virgil gave reluctant nod.

“Even if that were true, which I very much doubt it is coming from you, then why are you still here?” Roman asked, sceptical.

“I....” Janus swallowed his pride and spoke aloud his grievous mistake. “I made a deal with him to survive.”

“but he took my power, and used it to unmake the darkside!”

“Patton wouldn't do something like that.” Roman said confidently.

“Patton wouldn't do something like what?”

Janus pulled back as Patton approached, smiling cheerfully.

“Janus thinks you have done something bad.” Logan explained.

“Are you sure you didn't mishear him that I've done something 'Dad'?”

Janus snarled.

“You destroyed them, all the dark sides! Pieces of Thomas, ripped apart and gone!”

Patton laughed, “As if I would do anything to hurt dear Thomas!

Roman and Logan nodded with Patton, that of the two, Patton was far more trust-worthy than Deceit.

“Anyway, Thomas doesn't have dark sides, save for you....” Janus did not like the way Patton looked at him, as if he was nothing but another problem that needed 'fixing'. He shuddered.

Patton continued, “But don't worry, we'll all help you find your place and learn to be good! Just like Virgil!”

Virgil gave an uncomfortable shrug at being pointed out.

Janus turned to Roman, desperate, “Roman, your twin! He is... he is gone Roman!! Patton killed him!”

“My brother?” Roman frowned, and reached to the back of his head to rub against a fragment of a memory.

He looked to Patton for guidance, deeply confused.

“Don't be silly, you don't have a brother.”

Roman's hand dropped, and he shrugged at Janus. “I don't even have a brother. Don't speak such lies Snake!”

“You did! His name is... is... was.....”

Janus's eyes widened in horror, as he could not bring the name to mind.... nor the face....

Patton had not just destroyed the dark sides, but he had erased even the memories of them. How could Janus convince them of Patton's misdeed, when he had cleared every scrap of evidence from the mindscape?

How long before Janus himself forgot what Patton had done?

He lunged then at Patton, furious. He was stopped by Logan's arm easily blocking him and pushing him to the side.

Patton folded his arms, face full of fake concern.

“I was merciful before, but I think you need a time out Janus. Go to your room. In fact, I think it would be for the best if you were to stay there for the time being, and stop telling such terrible lies.”

“Roman, be a dear and take Janus to his room for me.”

“Sure thing Pat!”

As Janus let himself be led away, disbelieved and defeated, and destined to forget what he was and be moulded into whatever Patton deemed acceptable form of Deceit, Janus heard Patton address the other sides.

“Oh Kiddos, I'm just so happy! I have a feeling today is going to be a good day!”

#unsympandangstsidesbingo #unsympathetic sides #unsympathetic patton #angst #unhappy ending #major character death

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taxicabinmemphis · 4 years

Note

13. “Your eyes are so pretty.” romantic roceit, Janus charming Roman and trying to hide how much it affects him when Roman says anything kind about his appearance bc he doesn't think anyone can find him attractive when half his face is covered in scales (you don't have to do this btw but if you wanted another prompt here you go)

Roman walked off stage, letting his sword clatter to the floor as he caught his breath. He leaned against the prop table putting a hand to his forehead.

Slow clapping was accompanied by the approaching figure of Janus. Roman spared a glance to the deceitful side, but was too tired to give him his undivided attention.

“What do you want, Janus?” Roman asked with a sigh.

“Oh come now, Roman. I just came for the show!” Janus stopped a couple feet in front of the princely side. “And now, I applaud you on a job well done, like a rude and disrespectful audience member.”

“Thanks, I suppose.”

“’I suppose’?” Janus repeated, eyes wide in mock surprise. “Accept the praise, my talented prince. You performed horrendously!”

“I didn’t see you in the audience,” Roman remarked tiredly. “Stop with your games and tell me why you’re here.”

“So abrupt and to-the-point, hmm?”

“Just exhausted.”

Janus’ gaze softened, taking a step closer to Roman. “I’m not here to wear you out. I was honest—I’m just here to congratulate you, and...”

“And?”

“And give you this,” Janus finished, holding out a bouquet of roses. “It’s customary to give stage actors flowers after their performance.”

Janus was more nervous than he let on.

Roman let a small smile grace his features, and took the flowers carefully. “Thank you, Janus. This is really kind.”

Janus waved him off. “It’s nothing. Flowers don’t do justice to how much I appreciate you, though I suppose they will have to suffice.”

Roman’s face flushed. “Thank you.”

Janus held out a gloved hand. “I would hate to celebrate a successful performance with dinner, if you would like to join me.”

“I’d love to,” Roman accepted, taking his hand. “I’m starving.”

“Does Italian sound alright?”

Roman had taken a couple steps towards Janus when he took his hand, and was now face-to-face with the serpentine side.

He moved his other hand to Janus’ face, resting on the scales and brushing his thumb beneath his snake-like eye.

“You really are, tired, hmm?” Janus asked, attempting to sound smooth despite the blush lightly spreading across the human side of his face betraying his efforts.

“Your eyes are so pretty, you know that?” Roman asked quietly, ignoring Janus’ question. He ran his hand lightly down Janus’ scales. “And your scales too.”

“I..” Janus didn’t know how to respond. His snake features had never been something he considered to be particularly attractive, so this...affection his non-human side was receiving was new.

Roman smiled. “What’s the matter, Janus? You can dish it but you can’t take it?”

“I...no-”

“Someone has to remind you that you’re a snake,” Roman teased, “and that I can be the snake charmer.”

“Nonsense, Roman,” Janus said, hoping that brushing off Roman’s compliments would keep him ignorant to how they affected him. “We should get dinner.”

Roman took his hand from Janus’ face—the snake side suppressing a whine at the loss of contact—and put it around his waist.

“Dinner can wait.”

Janus wanted to reply, but the words caught in his throat when he made eye contact with the now very close creative side.

“Now, my lovely snake. Shall we dance, or shall we kiss?”

I hope that’s what you wanted. If it isn’t, you can ask for a redo! I also love these prompts thank you so much.

#ask #sanders sides #thanks for the ask!#roceit #romantic roceit #fic #kill writes #somehow-i-got-an-account

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joylessnightsky · 4 years

Text

Not my fault you got regrets...

I was inspired by this beautiful pice of art portraying pride!Roman made by @ghosttb0y (I’ll try to link the post but I’m not so sure I can figure out how to, do it might norm but it also might not...)

At second thought the outfit kind of reminded me of the costume from the music video from “Don’t make me” Thomas was featured in. So you’ll find a few references ;) I hope you all enjoy this dark pit of angst!

I never liked rain mutch. Sunny was more my style, went better with my esthetics. I liked the warmth and the golden glow. But one thing I had always liked about rain was the cleansing effect it seemed to have on the world. Well, I say always but only after Virgil pointed it out to me a while ago.

Virgil, huh? I probably should go check on him soon. My dark little prince. All mine. No one would take him away from me ever again. And I liked that thought. I really, really liked that.

“Ro-Bro?”, a soft voice called out to me, startling me out of my thoughts. A soft rustle followed. Did he try to walk away from his chains again? He should know that didn’t work by now! But, I suppose Remus has never been one for learning from experience. After a while of silence I finally let out a soft hum of confirmation. He sighed in what seemed to be relief. Then: “Are you... feeling better now?” You could tell how much strength it costed him to stay focused and calm. Kind of heart warming. But then again, of cause he did. It was about me, after all. The better twin. He had come to realize that by now.

“Oh, I feel splendid, dukey.”, I answered grinning, finally turning around to look at him. “Wonderful! Have you even seen me? I have everything and - what’s even better - you don’t. And that little snake doesn’t either!” I chuckled at that. Oh, yes. Janus, that filthy snake, lost everything through me, just like he had taken things from me. And, almighty Shakespeare, did that revenge taste sweet!

Soon the chuckle became louder and louder, until it was a full blown laugh. Not a manic one, of cause. No, it was a beautiful laugh. Because I was beautiful. Finally, everything about me was beautiful. I worked black so well, didn’t I? And the golden ornaments stood out even more. And the crown. After all this time I had found the crown of Creativety, the one making me a king. I ruled over the mindscape now, especially the imagination. Me, no one else.

“Roman, this isn’t-“, Remus began, but I silenced him with look. “That is ‘your majesty’ to you now. Or at least ‘my king’...”

Remus shook his head, almost defeatedly. “This is wrong. This isn’t you, Ro- I mean... your majesty...“ I could hear how much he hated to address me like that - and I just loved this all the more for that.

“See, this is where you are wrong: This is me. Janus was right. I am the evil twin. And I mean, they all made pretty clear in the past that they wanted dark sides. So~”

“This is insane! You are more insane than me right now.”

“Ha! But you are the psycho.”

“No, not this time. You’ve fallen from grace, brother. Take a look around! Your little paradise or whatever is lost! Your kingdom is in ashes, you chained me to the damn wall here, Virgil, the side you always claim to love, is cured in a cell and barely even conscious at all, Janus is banned from his own side of the mind and so weak that he can barely even lie anymore, you turned your back on your fam-“

“I did not turn my back on them!”, I yelled, startling my brother into silence. “They betrayed me! And it turned out... The villain is kinda fun to play, isn’t it?” I chuckled. He, however, looked at me miserably. “You were never built to be this way, though. You are a... a Hollywood romance kind of guy. All extra and sappy, remember?”

“Well, spoiler alert, Remus! This one is based on Shakespeare: The ending ain’t a happy one. And now hush. Because I deserve this. I deserve a happy ending more than any of you and if that means no one can get one, then fine! But I will get this I-“

A ringing phone interrupted me. One look at the display gave away the caller. I smirked. Really? Well, let’s entertain him, shall I?

“Hello, snake-face.”, I answered, “What do you want?”

“I am going to stop this now, Roman. This has fine too far and I just... This is your last chance to make things right again.”

That made me chuckle again. “Oh, but I already did. Things haven’t been this right in a long time.”

A sigh. “I really didn’t want for it to come to this, but... I guess I have to fight you, then.”

“Oh~? You do? You and... what army again?”

“All of our friends, Roman. That’s who my army is, if we have to call it that.”

“You friends.”, I corrected right away, taking my new sword, a beauty with a thorny rose-themed handle. “All of their offerings were empty, remember? Godless and cold, every single one of them.”

“Why... Despite all of my foresight, I just kept hoping that I was right. About you. And here you are, all dressed up in fancy clothes to hide the ugly truth. And what for?” He was right. I had diamonds, pearls and rubies worked into this outfit. It was enough to make anyone swoon, really. After all, even a king had got to slay...

Still. “Boo-boo”, I mocked him, “Can I offer you a little salt for that wound?” He hissed, obviously annoyed. Good. I smirked. “Hey, calm down snakey! They wanted a villain, right? So I showed you what a real villain is. It’s not my fault you got regrets...”

Silence. Then: “Fine. Let’s go to war.”

I smiled. “Yes. Let’s do.”

And then the line was dead.

#pride!roman #pride roman #sanders sides #angst #a lot of angst #this is seriously a lot of angst #my mind went a dark place kind of angst #i tried to warn you but...#read if you want #but only at your own ridk #also reference to prinxiety #fanfic #inspired by this post #picture fanfic #inspired #lyric referencing fanfic

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98prilla · 4 years

Text

Hidden Shapes

AO3

...

He aches. Every bone and muscle and sinew seems to throb with pain, and he hisses, hearing the soft papery sound of his scales brushing against each other, coiling and shifting groggily as he forces his eyes open.

“Jan? You with us?” He blinks, at the blurry form of Remus, hovering over him, managing a nod, though his eyes are already drifting shut. It must be bad, if he’s shifted himself, though he doesn’t remember anything happening.

“Oh, snakey, you just hang in there, ok? We’re taking care of you.” He feels a hand brush through his hair, leaning into it as he drifts off again.

…

The fire. The fire is back.

It’s scorching heat, up his tail, writhing around his arms, smoke wrapping around his throat, forcing itself into his lungs, and he gasps for air, trying to escape, trying to flee, but his wrists are bound, he’s tied on a stake while the pyre rages around him, the flames licking at his scales, and he bares his teeth, lunging away, lunging towards one of the figures dancing in the flames, stealing his air, and he hears a yelp, as his fangs sink into something, before being shoved off, shoved away, growling as his arms are pinned, a weight on his tail, and he can’t get it off, he thrashes, but he can’t get it off, can’t get free, no matter how hard he hisses and spits and writhes.

“JANUS!” The voice breaks through, just barely, just enough to make him hesitate, to stop, surprise washing over him, though his fangs are still bared, still ready to bite. “Janus. Breathe. It’s ok, it’s just me, just Virgil, you’re ok, please, just breathe.” He inhales sharply, deeply, gasping, he hadn’t realized he was holding his breath. Finally his vision clears, after several long moments, locking on Virgil’s purple eyes, pale face, messier than usual makeup. He’s panting slightly, sitting atop him, atop his tail, pinning his wrists to the ground, concern and fear playing across his features.

“V-Vee?” Virgil’s face softens, and he nods, eyes searching his face.

“It’s me, Jan. It’s ok. You had a nightmare and started panicking, lashing out. I’m gonna let you up now, ok? Unless you wanna have a go at Remus, too, he deserves it, probably.” He huffs at that, as Virgil releases him, helps him to sit.

“Oooh, could you crush me? Maybe I should make a giant snake to constrict me! Do you think my ribs would crack, and explode through my chest, and my beating heart would be visible before I’m devoured whole by its giant maw?”

“wonderful, Remus, thank you for that lovely vision.” He replies, earning a laugh from Remus, a lopsided grin from Virgil.

Then Virgil hisses in a sharp breath, squeezing his eyes shut, hand fisting into the fabric of his hoodie.

“Vee?” Remus asks, worry tinging his tone, and Janus’s eyes widen, noticing the pinprick beads of red against Virgil’s neck for the first time, the trickle of blood running down in rivulets, realizing what must have happened.

“I bit you.” He whispers, as Virgil shakes, doubling over. “I bit you!”

“Fine… I’ll be fine…” He gasps out, voice shaking, echoing with tempest tongue as his shadows darken, lengthen.

“Kiddos? You ok? I heard a ruckus?” Patton asks, popping into the room, instantly hurrying to Virgil’s side.

“Virg?” His voice is soft, but Virgil flinches, eyes darting up to look at him, and he yelps, stumbling backwards. The whites of Virgil’s eyes have turned black, his usually dark eyes a near glowing neon violet. Underneath are six more eyes in total, dark, shiny things. As he watches, his canines lengthen into fangs.

“nononono…” Virgil mumbles, and he almost reaches out again, then Virgil’s head flies back in a silent scream, eyes blazing with light, dark fire exploding out of him, writhing around him, and eight, long, spindly apendages sprout from his back, then the darkness releases Virgil, and he sprawls across the ground, trembling, from pain, exhaustion, or fear, Patton can’t tell, maybe a bit of all of them.

“Virgil-“ Before he can get more out of his mouth, Virgil lurches to his feet, to his eight black legs, eyes wide and shaking, and he bolts, flashing past Patton so fast he’s barely even a blur, vanishing through the door to his room, leaving the rest of them in a stunned silence.

“Fuck a duck.” Remus mutters, eyes wide, staring after him for a second, before bolting to his feet and charging up the stairs, slamming the door to his own room, surprising and confusing Patton further, before his attention turns to Janus, who’s own face is pale, brows drawn.

“So. Um. What… just… happened?” He squeaks out, trying to keep from straight up panicking. Janus lets out a long sigh, head thumping back against the couch cushions.

“I had a nightmare. I lashed out. And I… bit him.”

“Oh. So… is that why he turned into… that?” Janus groans, tail twisting with uncertainty.

“Yes. And no. My bite reveals things. The absolute truth of what… who… someone is. And the more you fight the venom, the more it hurts, until it forces you to change into your truest reflection, reveals you fully. Which is exactly what it did, to Virgil. It revealed the truth he’s been so carefully hiding.” Patton tilted his head, thinking over the implications, before his mouth formed a silent ‘o’, realization washing over him.

“his animal. He’s… a spider?” Janus nods, closing his eyes in confirmation. “oh. Oh no. Oh, no wonder he was so scared! Oh, he probably thinks I’ll be scared of him, doesn’t he? Knowing him, he probably thinks I’ll hate him and never want to see him again! Oh, this is not good!”

“He’ll be long gone in the imagination by now, Remus’s side. He is exceptionally excellent at hiding. Remember to look up.” He mumbles, exhaustion washing over him.

“Lo, Ro!” Patton calls, the two of them rising up moments later. “Logan, I need you to stay with him, ok? His fever just broke, so Janus, try and stay awake for a bit, just to eat something, ok?” He nods, though the task seems impossible. “Roman, I need you with me. We’re going to the imagination.”

“Padre, I love taking you on quests, but is now really-“

“Remus’s side. We need to find Virgil, I’ll explain more as we move, let’s go!” Without further explanation, Patton pulled Roman up the stairs, leaving Logan and Janus alone.

“Well. That was… sudden. I’m glad to see you’re feeling better.” Logan murmurs, turning his full attention back to Janus, who frowns slightly, eyes drifting back open, as he looks at himself, realizing his tail has shifted back, though he still has more scales than usual.

“Me too, apparently. Though I may have inadvertently thrown Virgil into a crisis."

“So I gathered. How are you feeling? Any symptoms?” he shakes his head.

“no. Just… tired, I suppose."

“Excellent. Then maybe you can inform me of why you didn’t tell anyone you were feeling ill, much less to the extent that you were.” He winces at the colder tone to Logan's voice, though he can tell it’s out of worry.

“I… didn’t think to. I didn’t think you would want to be bothered, by me. I would have, truly, if I’d been aware how bad it was going to get.”

“You are not a bother, Janus, your health, both physical and mental, is important to me, as well as the rest of us. I would request you come to us, with any future problems, before you’re so fevered you’re hallucinating.” He huffs a small laugh at Logan's dry tone, nodding once more.

“Will do, Logan. If that’s all settled, I believe someone promised food?”

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subtlereferencetomyinterests · 4 years

Text

No Other Version of Me

Ao3, MasterPost

Relationships: Moceit!

This ain’t a songfic, but the title is taken from ‘Jackie & Wilson’ by Hozier because. I wanted it to be.

Warnings: Very mild body horror related to excessive shape-shifting, Fwoggy Patton (he’s got frog features), insecurity, hurt/comfort, one (1) smooch, crying.

Word Count: 2,100

Janus was not nosy. Really, he’d only intended to return Patton’s electric blanket (he’d asked to borrow it on a particularly cold day in The Mindscape, and he definitely didn’t hold onto it for longer than necessary just because it smelled like Patton). Then, he would be on his way. Therefore, it was completely incidental that he’d heard a frustrated cry from Morality’s room before entering. And of course, the only reason that Janus continued to peer through the slightly ajar doorway- rather than just walking in- was so that he could assess the situation properly. To be safe.

The situation was this: Patton was hunched in front of the mirror above his dresser, shaking from head to toe. He was just visible in the reflection, revealing what seemed to be the issue.

Patton’s hands were oversized, webbed, and bright green. That same shade of citrus seemed to be overtaking his face, spanning across his eyes and nose and down his neck.

On the subject of his eyes; absolutely enormous, with oblong and dilated pupils surrounded by muck-brown irises. Oh, and they were also steadily filling up with tears, which was probably a more pressing issue.

Janus could have- and probably should have- just walked away and pretended he hadn’t seen anything. He almost did, turning to leave only to hear an absolutely heart-breaking wail from the room behind him. He sighed, spinning on his heel again and gently shouldering the door open.

“Good evening.”

The emotional trait startled at that, and when he flipped around he had changed- no webbed hands, no green splotches, just a shiny faux face. Janus clicked the door closed behind him; evidently this would be a sensitive issue.

“Oh- hey Janus! Can I help you with something?”

He had always hated Morality’s fake smile. Before they’d grown close, Deceit despised how it was another symbol of his repression. Now he hated it for how it paled in comparison to Patton’s genuine beam.

Janus held up the fluffy blanket still folded in his arms and then tossed it onto the bed.

“I was just dropping by to return your blanket. While I’m here, though, would you tell me why you’re doing that?”

Patton looked much like a deer caught in headlights, panic flashing across his masked face. He forced a laugh.

“Doing what?”

The literal embodiment of lies raised his eyebrow and patiently waited for Patton to own up. He didn’t, the stubborn little thing.

“The shapeshifting,” Janus pressed, “It can’t be comfortable to keep that up all day. I would know, I do it the most out of any of us,” with that, he extended his additional arms. He actually didn’t hide them much nowadays, what with being accepted and all, but they’d been getting in the way of chores (and also, it added some drama to the point he was making). Regardless, he hoped that Patton would understand what he was trying to convey- I know how you feel. You can trust me now, remember?

The moral side kept his hands held to his chest and his eyes downcast, blinking very quickly. The skin around his arms and face was taught and plasticky, like that of a mannequin. The disturbing signs of over-shifted forms.

“I know it’s been too long, Jan, I do- but this isn't a bunch of extra arms, or anything cool like that. It’s…” his hushed speech trailed off. Janus stepped closer and reached out. Patton let him hold his hands, trembling.

“Oh, come now, it can’t be worse than this,” Deceit gestured to the left side of his face, a clear joke. It backfired- Morality looked even more dismayed, muttering something that wasn’t quite audible. Janus squeezed his hands.

“Please. Show me.”

Patton seemed almost ready to argue as they met eyes, but the fight fell from him almost instantly. A dull teal shimmer passed over his face and neck, continuing to run down his arms. What was left from the transformation were watery, frog-like eyes behind his glasses and soft hands with pudgy fingers. The tips of those fingers were much wider than humans, not to mention nail-less. Up close, various lime-colored splotches were visible scattered about his skin in seemingly random places.

He was stunning.

And he was crying.

“No matter what I do,” Patton whispered, “It won’t go away. I’ve tried everything, Janus.”

“Why on earth would you want to get rid of this?”

Patton jerked his hands back to his chest and pulled away, bumping into his dresser.

“Look at me! I look like a monster! Why wouldn’t I want to get rid of it?”

Janus scoffed at the notion as if it were the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard, though his heart ached at the fresh tears that slipped down Patton’s face. He didn’t hesitate so much as a moment, sliding off his glove. His left glove.

“I am looking, can’t you see?” he let the article drop to the floor, reaching out a candy-apple colored claw to take Patton’s hand in his once more, “You’re absolutely beautiful, in this or any other form.”

Morality’s breath hitched as Deceit twined their fingers together, watching him cautiously. The moral side was quiet, save for staggered breathing, only for a moment.

“You don’t mean that.”

Janus cupped the side of his face with an unoccupied hand, gently dragging the gloved thumb beneath Patton’s eye to dry some of his tears.

“I’m not lying. Not about this, and not to you. I mean it,” I mean it so much more than you could possibly know.

Patton seemed to search his expression, gauging the sincerity. Janus met the gaze without falter. That was what most people forgot about lying- it’s the eyes, you can always see it in the eyes.

Patton leaned into him.

“You really do mean it, huh?”

“Of course I do,” the dishonest trait tried to ignore the heat that spread across his face when Morality smiled at him, tiny and genuine.

“You’re really pretty, too,” he murmured, “At least, I think so.”

The human side of Janus’ face was flaming. He tilted his head to the side and cleared his throat- this wasn’t about him. He would not relent to the thrumming in his heart and the fuzz in his mind, for he needed to focus on comforting his friend. Friend. Frieeeends. That was what they were, just in case he had forgotten.

“Thank you, Patton.”

He was met with a small giggle, and then they were hugging. Patton wrapped his arms around Janus’ torso and pressed his face against the side of the snake’s neck, and oh, that felt illegally wonderful. When he spoke, it rumbled against the lying side’s scales.

“Thank you. I don’t know if I’ll ever be used to this,” he held up a froggy hand, “It still seems like a punishment for what I did, one that I probably deserve. But if you still like m- it… then it doesn’t feel so bad.”

That pricked Janus’ ears. Patton saying he deserved any sort of ‘punishment’, like it was the most obvious and fair thing in the world, it struck something in him. Something deep and familiar and painful.

“Why do you think you deserve it?”

Patton hid his face further, his breath warm against Deceit’s skin.

“I did kinda freak out and turn into a giant monster… actions should have consequences.”

“So the emotional distress, the Roman fiasco, me showing up, those weren’t ‘consequences’? Consequences that don’t involve permanently changing your self-image?”

“But was it enough? Didn’t I get off a little too easily?”

Janus tossed his head back with a high-pitched laugh, which probably didn’t help the situation much- but the irony! The irony!

“I’m sorry, dear, but you saying that to me, well, it didn’t catch me off-guard at all,” he fixed his remaining arms around Patton comfortingly as the cackles subsided.

“What are you talking about, Jan?” Morality pulled his head back, melancholy replaced with confusion.

“Look at us,” Janus said gleefully, “Just a few months ago I couldn’t get within five feet of you without you acting like I was going to murder you.”

Patton winced at Deceit’s less-than-comforting phrasing.

“Let me reiterate: you thought that because I wanted you to. It was my intention to be threatening, and the blame for that lies with me. And after all of that, you forgave me almost immediately. You can’t extend the same courtesy to yourself?”

“But that’s different!”

“Is it? Explain it to me.”

“It just is when it’s somebody else.”

“Exactly! We’ve found the problem. Your self-imposed rules are much stricter on yourself than on anybody else. That doesn’t sound very fair, does it?”

“I-” Patton looked almost argumentative, but just as before, it evaporated into exhaustion, “I don’t know. Maybe. But I’m not in charge of other people, and I am in charge of me.”

“That you are. And you’ve just been so easy on yourself. Plus you totally haven’t been improving, and it’s not like that counts more than anything else.”

Patton blinked, taking his time to unscramble the backwards talk. He hummed in thought.

“Even if I still don’t love this new- uh- ‘new look’, I think… Maybe I needed to hear that?” he admitted, a sheepish smile returning. Patton kept himself so very near in their hug that it was becoming dizzying, but Janus had to stay focused.

“Perhaps I can help with that, too.”

He felt a thrill chase up his spine when Morality tipped his head to the side inquisitively.

“Really?”

“I believe so. I have no idea what it’s like looking abnormal, after all. So if you ever feel particularly bad about your, ah, amphibian appearance, then you know where to find me. I’ll be sure to remind you just what you are,” Deceit loosened his grip and leaned back just the tiniest bit, readying himself to make the final point.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re worthy of love,” he was just parroting the moral trait’s words back to him, it carried no connotations nor significance. It was a callback at most. Janus tried to hammer that into his head, even when Patton looked at him so shocked and adoringly and he felt that it was beginning to mean so much more. The meaning twisted around the more he prolonged the embrace, the more he stared into those wide watery eyes, the more he wanted it to twist.

“Oh,” Patton murmured. He curled his fingers in the fabric of Janus’ capelet, “Oh, Janus.”

They were so close, their faces just inches apart. And he was leaning closer, closer, almost touching. Janus’ breath hitched when Patton stopped short, watching him carefully and... expectantly?

Janus realized that Morality would never close the gap between them, not in this kind of sensitive state. Janus also knew that, should he not do it himself, Patton wouldn’t bring it up again, for fear of seeming pushy. As terrifying the thought of kissing the object of his affections was, there was something much more horrible about the thought of not doing it. So, no reason to overthink it, he supposed.

Janus tipped his head up and connected their lips.

Patton kissed back eagerly, leaning down to accommodate their height difference. He was sweet, and warm, a gentle pressure against Deceit. He smiled, letting his hand rest at the small of Janus’ back. They moved together slowly, easily, as though this was something they were already practiced at. It was a second nature.

When they finally broke apart, Patton glanced down at his arms. He giggled a little, pressing his forehead to Janus’.

“Looks like the kiss didn’t turn me human.”

Janus, who was trying very hard to have coherent thoughts at the moment, shook his head. It took a few seconds of breathy and very embarrassing squeaking sounds before he managed to say actual words.

“Humanity is overrated, Darling,” which would have been a very smooth and dramatic thing to say, if only he wasn’t clutching to Patton for dear life and burning at the ears.

“If you say so,” the moral side pressed a kiss to the tip of his nose.

“Hhaghhh,” Janus responded eloquently, shoving his flushed face into Patton’s shoulder. The trait laughed, a lilting sound right against Janus’ ear. It was intoxicating.

“You are just too adorable, Jan.”

“This was a horrible mistake. I never should have returned that blanket and I hate you.”

“I can let go of you, if you want?”

“Not in a million years.”

Patton laughed at him again. Whatever, it was so worth it.

@shrimp-crockpot

#my writing #fanfiction #fanfic #sanders sides #ts #moceit #janus #patton #ts janus #ts patton #sanders sides fanfiction #ts fanfic #tw frog

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whitworth-waldo · 4 years

Text

So, I wrote a one shot on Loceit, and it was kinda based in the flirty wave things that Janus just LOVES doing at Logan, but it feels kinda forced into it, but I tried my best so... I saw @totallybelievabledude's post and I wanted to write that.

Sorry if it's not what you wanted, but I'm pretty proud if it. 🥰

Anyway:

It was the middle of an argument, well, not necessarily an argument, more of a debate. Well, no one knows what to call it, but it was Deceit, Patton, Roman. Logan occasionally popped up with some facts here and there.

Deceit had been impersonating Logan for a little bit throughout the argument debate thingy because he knew the sides wouldn’t listen to him, and he just liked doing anything involving his boyfriend, well, secret boyfriend. The others didn’t know, and they didn’t need to. Plus, it would be weird to pop up as Virgil and just be like, “Hey, so you know how I hate Deceit? I think we should listen to him, I STILL HATE HIM THOUGH!”

So, that brings us about to where Logan came back, the real one.

“Not that any of you care-”

“Oh shit, shit.”

Deceit hid his face while Logan continued.

“I am unharmed and I don’t want to talk about it.”

Deceit smirked, he knew exactly why Logan didn’t want to talk about it, but we won’t go there.

“I’m just here to deliver one last fact and spare you my company.”

Deceit waved at Logan, much like how he did during the first Selfishness vs Selflessness fight, Logan got all flustered the first time, so it would probably work out the second time.

Patton went to say something, probably telling him that everyone enjoys him being around, but Logan interrupted.

“PETER SINGER-”

Deceit guessed he had to shout to get everyone’s attention, or he was just discombobulated from the wave, who knew. He wondered where Logan was going with this, Deceit recognized the name, but he couldn’t remember who the guy was or where he heard of him from.

“Is an Australian philosopher and activist who champions the movement called 'Effective Altruism'. The primary feature that differentiates Effective Altruism from other moral philosophies is its practicality. It employs the heart, and the mind so that Effective Altruism can earn its namesake and actually… be effective.”

Deceit was confused. Was Logan gonna agree with him? Were the others finally going to see he’s not that bad?

“The aim is to help as many people as possible while maintaining a "Perfectly Adequate standard of living'. So a poor, sick person giving five of their last fifteen cents to an aid organization, while incredibly altruistic, is not effective altruism because that money won’t go very far, and the act would only harm that person’s already unacceptable standard of living.”

Logan was on Deceit’s side! Logan, the logical side, the side that everyone ended up listening to at the end of the day, he was 100% on Deceit’s side! He wasn’t kind of agreeing, only to say that Deceit was wrong. Nope, he was agreeing with every point Deceit had made so far.

Deceit didn’t know if Logan was just biased, but damn did it feel good.

Deceit threw himself onto Logan’s bed, he landed face down and groaned. Logan, who was behind him chuckled.

“What’s the problem?”

Deceit sat up.

“That was tense. Now come here.”

Logan tilted his head, but he sat on the bed next to Deceit. Deceit had a lazy smirk as he pulled Logan onto his lap, he rested his head on Logan’s shoulder and wrapped his arms around Logan’s torso.

There was a knock on Logan’s door.

“I’m doing something currently, I’ll be able to come down in 30 minutes.”

Deceit smirked as he heard the person walk away, he used Logan’s voice. A perk, he thought. He was able to copy the side’s voices while not having to appear like them. Logan sighed, knowing Deceit would whine if he moved, and in all honesty, he didn’t want to move. He moved so that he was lying across his boyfriend's lap, instead of sitting on it.

“My head was comfy! Traitor.”

Logan shrugged at Deceit’s mock betrayed tone. He grabbed a book that was on his bed. A Series of Unfortunate Events. Logan found himself enjoying this series, even if it was quite different from the books he usually read.

Deceit started to run his hand through Logan’s hair, and suddenly, Logan found that he couldn’t focus on the book.

“Do you think the others will be suspicious that you agreed with me?”

Logan shrugged, he rested his head on the mattress and looked at his boyfriend.

“Even if they are, it’s not like they’ll expect something like this.”

They were both quiet for a while, both enjoying the comfortable silence. Then there was another knock on Logan’s door. Deceit rolled his eyes.

“Yes?”

Logan just told him to hide, Deceit shook his head and smirked.

“Uh, you ok buddy? You’ve been up here for like, an hour more than you said you would be.”

Logan looked at his watch, Roman was right.

“I guess I got too interested in the book I was reading. Sorry, I'll be down in a second.”

Logan stood up and stretched, Deceit got up after him. Deceit placed a chaste kiss on Logan’s cheek and waved. It was the same flirtatious wave he’s been doing, it always made Logan blush.

Deceit then teleported, or you could call it fast traveled, there wasn’t a name for it, but Deceit did that to the dark side of the mind place.

“Where were you all day?”

Remus had an eyebrow lifted and his head tilted in confusion.

“There was a dilemma, and it seemed like they needed me.”

Remus nodded.

“I’m gonna go microwave this fork. I’ll tell you what happens.”

Remus ran away, and Deceit chased him. Luckily, Deceit managed to catch Remus before he could put the fork in the microwave, but then he heard the microwave go off in the kitchen.

“What did you do?!”

Remus shrugged, but he couldn’t contain his smile.

“I put a barbie in the microwave, and I knew if you saw it, you would take it out. It was a classic distraction method.”

Deceit groaned.

“WHY?!”

“Why not?”

Deceit covered his face with his hands.

“I swear; you scare me sometimes.”

Remus gasped and put a hand on his chest in an offended manner.

“Sometimes?!”

Remus mumbled something that Deceit couldn’t hear, well, almost.

“Must not be trying hard enough.”

Deceit shook his head.

“Please don’t try harder, I don’t want you being even more chaotic!”

Remus shrugged.

“Whatever you say.”

Remus walked away and Deceit presumed he went into his room, so Deceit went into his. He took off his coat and his under-blouse. He then put on a yellow hoodie over a white tee-shirt, he paired it with black sweatpants. He took off his hat and ran his hands through his hair.

Deceit woke up to someone throwing themselves onto his bed right next to where he was, up until now, sleeping. Deceit recognized the figure next to him almost instantly, so he snaked his arm around their waist.

“You were right.”

“Of course I was dear.”

Deceit moved so that his boyfriend was pressed flush against his chest.

“Roman told Virgil what happened. Virgil didn’t like it one bit, so they called me down and started questioning me. A lot.”

Deceit nodded, knowing how upset Virgil could get. He had to deal with Virgil when he was a lot, for a lack of a better word, worse. It’s not like he ever thought Virgil was a burden, he could just get very agitated and rude when someone brought up a touchy subject, and Deceit guessed he was now a touchy subject.

“Do they know?”

Logan shook his head.

“No, I don’t think they thought of anything like that. They wanted to know if we were friends.”

Deceit hummed.

“What did you say?”

“I said no, but I didn’t necessarily mind your company. Which is true. Technically, we’re more than friends, and I don’t mind your company if anything I adore it.”

Deceit chuckled.

“You don’t have to defend lies when you’re talking to me. Literally, up until today, the other sides knew me as Deceit.”

Logan shrugged and rolled over so that he was now facing Deceit. Logan shoved his face into the crook of Deceit’s neck. Deceit rolled his eyes.

“Hey, Dee? Do yo-”

Remus had barged into Deceit’s room, only to find the two brain cells, as the fanders deemed them, intertwined and cuddling.

“I see you’re busy. I’ll come back later.”

Remus shut the door and walked away.

“Will he tell the others?!”

Logan looked up to his boyfriend with big doe eyes, Deceit almost died then and there.

“No, even if he does the other’s would take it as him being the cursed… thing that he is.”

From a bit away, the two heard Remus yell.

“Wear protection!”

Logan’s face lit up a bright cherry hue and he froze. Deceit laughed and rolled his eyes. Logan shoved his face back into the crook of Deceit’s neck, and Deceit could feel the heat radiating off of Logan’s face.

Deceit kissed the top of Logan’s head, and he used the arm that wasn’t around his partner's waist to play with Logan’s hair. Deceit felt Logan relax, and soon Logan started drifting off.

When Logan woke up, he was on his bed. He frowned and looked around for his python partner, but Deceit was nowhere to be found. He got up and went to brush his teeth, but then he noticed a familiar yellow hoodie on his nightstand. It was neatly folded and had a note on top.

“Sorry I had to drop you off, but we wouldn’t want Remus to think we did anything besides cuddling. Since you couldn’t wake up next to me, why not wake up next to my hoodie? Eh, sorry that was bad, but I’m writing this with a quill because that’s all I have in my room, plus it looks cool.

~ Your Boa Boyfriend (Sorry again, couldn’t help myself.)

Janus”

Logan laughed at the note. He unfolded the hoodie and put it on. Despite all the sides being relatively the same height, the hoodie was a little big on Logan, even though it seemed to fit Deceit perfectly.

Anyway, when Logan walked out into the kitchen wearing a yellow hoodie, especially after siding with Deceit, the only side who wears yellow, they had even more questions. Logan just shrugged at all of them and ignored them.

It’s safe to assume that those little flirty waves that Deceit does, those really work on Logan.

#deceit x logan #logan x deceit #loceit #long reads #fanfic #kinda long but thats ok

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miguel-manbemel · 4 years

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Aspects & Fanfics Ep. 34: The Vacation Part 1: A Rough Start

I thought I wouldn’t have this finished on time, as I’ve been writing all the monologues with the Sides, making that Roman video and then also writing the Spanish subtitles for the new episode of Sanders Sides. But I got it just on time, and here it is. It’s the first part of a story which I don’t know yet how many parts it will have. We’ll find out together. Now, without further ado, I leave you with the story and I hope you enjoy it. Until next time.

SYNOPSIS: Thomas and the Sides travel to Sandersia to spend a week of vacation in the Royal Castle with Roland and Ira. The objective is for Remus and Roland to get to know each other and eventually become friends, so that Roland will let Remus and Janus marry in the Royal Castle with Logan and Patton. But Remus has all kinds of doubts about it and the day is not going to end in very good terms...

WARNINGS: Romantic prinxiety, logicality and dukeceit. There’s a scene featuring an apparent death, and a lot of angst, especially from Remus.

EPISODE INDEX

[Remus and Janus are inside the royal carriage going through Sandersia towards the royal castle. Roman and Virgil are sitting in front of them]

REMUS: [nervous] I don’t know if this is a good idea, guys…

JANUS: Why? It’s only a week of vacation. You have nothing to worry about.

REMUS: Honey, I appreciate that you lie to try and comfort me, but you and I both know this is more than a vacation, at least for me.

ROMAN: Remus, relax. If you behave just like you’ve been behaving with us the previous weeks, there’s nothing you should be afraid of… Well, maybe bringing crushed cockroaches to his door like you usually do to mine is not a good idea if you want to impress my brother Roland, but you know what I mean, right?

REMUS: What about it? It’s a proof of my undying brotherly love for you, Roman! I'm bringing you the delicious products of my hunting around my room!

ROMAN: [trying to hide disgust] Yes, of course, Remus, of course…

REMUS: [over dramatically offended] Okay, whatever, it’s your loss! The next one I catch, I’ll cook and eat it myself, and I won’t share!

JANUS: Hearing that makes me long to be a real snake again… at least as a snake I could eat that without feeling nausea…

[intro sequence]

REMUS: Ugh, this carriage is taking forever. Didn’t you say that this thing used to travel at lightspeed? It doesn’t look so.

ROMAN: Yeah, I know. Since the Dark Master manipulated the royal carriages, we haven’t been able to figure out how to put them back to normal. We’ll have to deal with that for the time being. At least, they’re still convenient to travel, even if not faster than a regular car of the outer world.

VIRGIL: Also, maybe it’s not a good idea to have two carriages at the same time running at that speed. We could crash against Thomas and the others’ carriage if they stopped abruptly for some reason, and Thomas could get hurt. I mean, all of us could get hurt, but Thomas is human and his wounds wouldn’t heal as easily, so…

ROMAN: Yeah, maybe so…

REMUS: And I don’t know what your brother expects from me! How can I please him if I don’t know him or what he wants?

ROMAN: Well, that’s what we’re going there for, Remus. Your task is to get to know him and let him get to know you, and eventually become friends.

REMUS: [beat] And then, we’ll live happily ever after, right? We’re the Sanders Sides, Roman, not the Brady Bunch.

ROMAN: But Remus…

REMUS: Let’s face facts, okay? Your brother hates me. He has a valid reason, of course, after what I did, but nothing I can do is gonna make him stop hating me.

ROMAN: But…

REMUS: If saving your son from the clutches of the Dark Master himself didn’t change his opinion about me, I doubt I can do anything else to convince him… This is a mistake, we should go back.

ROMAN: [loud and a bit angry] NO!

[there’s a short silence, then Roman continues]

ROMAN: You’re not gonna run away from this without at least trying! You owe it to him, like you said, after what you did to him! At least, make the effort to fix things for once in your life! I’m tired of having to mediate between my two brothers, not being able to share time with both of you at the same time!

REMUS: But he’s your brother, Roman, not mine! I don’t owe him anything!

ROMAN: That’s bold of you to say considering that you would have killed him if Ira hadn’t stopped you at the last second.

REMUS: [hurt] You’re never gonna let me live up with that, right, Roman? You will always hold that against me!

ROMAN: Remus, I already forgave you long ago, but it’s Roland to whom you did that. You have to earn his forgiveness too. I think it’s only fair that at least you try to apologize to him and show him that you have no ill will against him.

REMUS: But I have no ill will against him, you know it!

ROMAN: But he doesn’t know. I’m gonna tell you something he told me last time, but I beg you, please don’t mention him I told you. He’s still terribly scared of you. And even if he hadn’t told me verbally, he had already made that clear to me non-verbally. What you did to him… traumatized him to the point that your mere mention makes him go pale and slightly tremble. I noticed it the last time we spoke. He tries to hide it because he thinks that, as the regent prince, he has to show strength to govern this principality, or at least that he has to look like it. And I’m sure he wants to make me believe that he’s strong enough so that I think that nothing can affect him. But I’ve know him since he was a baby. I know when he’s scared, and you, Remus, you scare him to death.

REMUS: Why are you telling me all of this? To make me feel even guiltier? To remind me that the blame for his suffering is all mine and I should go to hell for my past actions? To tell me that my struggle for doing better is useless and I should stop trying?

ROMAN: No, Remus, you’re taking it the wrong way. I’m telling you this to make you understand that your actions had consequences, and in order to be able to truly move on, you must try, at least, to fix those consequences the best that you can. I want to be able to tell my brother about you without causing him a panic attack and my biggest wish, even if probably impossible, is that you two managed to get along, or at least tolerate each other. He’s doing a big effort to make this work. I want that at least you do the same effort. If it doesn’t work out in the end, I’ll understand, but don’t give up without at least trying. Like I told Roland, if not for him, at least do it for me.

REMUS: [sighs] Okay… I can’t promise that I’ll fulfill your brother’s expectations in the end… but I will try, for you.

ROMAN: Thank you, brother. [singing sweetly] “That’s all I ask of you.”

JANUS: Phantom of the Opera, my favorite musical.

VIRGIL: [ironic] I wonder why? [looking out the window] Okay, guys, I think we’re arriving to the castle.

REMUS: [nervous] Oh, gosh…

JANUS: [holding Remus’ hand] Calm down, Rem. Remember we’re rooting for you.

REMUS: I hope so…

ROMAN: Your nervousness shows that you’re taking this pretty seriously. Thank you.

[the carriage stops in front of the castle, next to the other carriage. All the gang comes out of the carriages. Roland and Ira are waiting at the door. When Roland sees Remus he makes a tense face for a second, but puts himself together]

ROLAND: Greetings, guests. Welcome back to the castle.

THOMAS: It’s nice to be back, Roland.

ROMAN: Hi, Roland, nice to see you again. I… suppose you remember my brother Remus.

ROLAND: [frowning at him slightly] Yes, I do. [low voice, but not low enough so that they can’t hear him] Unfortunately…

REMUS: [ignoring that] How… how do you do, sir?

ROLAND: [sardonic] Oh, “sir”? You call me now sir? That’s new.

ROMAN: Roland… you promised.

ROLAND: I know… I know, sorry, you’re right. Let’s do as if nothing had happened and start over. Welcome to the castle, Remus.

REMUS: Thank you.

[Remus rises his hand. Roland hesitates for a second, then timidly reaches his hand to Remus’ and shakes hands with him. Remus can feel Roland’s hand trembling inside his and when he looks at his face he notices how pale he’s suddenly gone]

REMUS: Before anything else… I wanted to say that I’m sorry for everything I did to you. It was really bad and I understand that it probably is unforgivable. But I’m sorry, anyway, and I hope you accept my apologies. I promise I will never ever do that sort of thing again, by my noble title I swear.

ROLAND: [with a face of surprise] That’s… that’s actually kind of you to say. Okay, enough time spent at the door. Please, come in. Ira, show them their rooms. I have to take care of some urgent matters in my room.

IRA: It will be my pleasure.

ROLAND: I hope you excuse me right now, we’ll have time to talk later.

ROMAN: Of course, Roland. See ya later.

IRA: Follow me, guys.

ROMAN: Thank you, Ira.

[The gang enters the castle, following Ira, while Roland goes somewhere else]

IRA: You must excuse Roland today, he hasn’t been himself at all. He’s so nervous that this morning he dropped the teapot when he was about to serve himself a cup of coffee. It took two hours to clean the shattered teapot and the huge stain of coffee from the carpet, and the stain is still not gone completely.

ROMAN: I’m sorry to hear that.

REMUS: I guess it’s my fault.

IRA: It is, indeed… Oh, I’m… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude, but I suppose you understand this is not easy for him.

REMUS: It’s not easy for me either. I may act without thinking most of the time and I may love to pester everyone with all kinds of shenanigans, but I mean no real harm for anyone, and back then I wasn’t myself either. By the way, I never got the chance to thank you.

IRA: Thank me? For what?

REMUS: For stopping me at the last second before I did something unfixable. To think that I could have killed someone for real if you hadn’t arrived on time… I would have had that on my conscience, at leas the little amount of conscience I have in my brain, for all of my life. So, again, thank you for stopping me.

IRA: Well… you’re welcome, and I’m happy I could have been of help in your path to… redemption. I apologize too for the times I had to take control of your body in emergencies.

REMUS: It’s okay… as long as it happens in a real emergency and you don’t take too long. It’s a horrible feeling, like Roman and Patton can attest.

IRA: Of course. I’ll try not to do that again, unless I’m forced by circumstances. Well, we’re here. This is Patton and Logan’s room. I hope you like it.

LOGAN: It looks adequate.

PATTON: I love this room, [excited squeeing] and look, Logan, there’s a portrait of kittens on the main wall! I love this! Thank you, Ira!

IRA: I knew you would love it, Patton. See ya later guys.

[while Logan and Patton enter their room, the others follow Ira to the next door]

IRA: This room will be for Thomas, Ian and Chris.

THOMAS: Yeah, a room for the single ones. It will be like being back on the student residence when I was in college.

CHRIS: It could be fun.

IAN: Thank you, Ira.

IRA: You’re welcome.

[the others follow Ira to the next door]

IRA: This room will be for Roman and Virgil. I would have given you the royal suite as the Royal Princes of Sandersia, but I thought you would prefer to be all next to each other. I can set up the royal chamber if you want me to.

ROMAN: No, Ira, you guessed right. I prefer being next to my friends for the week, and this room is lovely too.

VIRGIL: Yes, thank you, Ira.

[Remus and Janus follow Ira to the last door]

IRA: And this is your room, guys. I hope you like it.

JANUS: It’s totally not great at all, Ira. Thank you.

IRA: You’re welcome.

REMUS: Yes, I suppose it’s okay. I’m not an expert in super clean rooms, so…

IRA: I… I prefer not to know what you’re talking about… Okay, now, if you excuse me, I’ve got some chores to do. I still have to finish up cleaning the coffee spot. I’ll go check on you later. See ya, guys.

JANUS: See ya, Ira. It’s so good to see you living your best life now. When I think that for some time, we had lost you.

IRA: That time is in the past now, thankfully. See ya later, my friend.

[Ira leaves them while Remus and Janus enter the room]

REMUS: Yes, it’s not a bad castle. Not as good as my own castle, but not bad at all.

JANUS: Are you feeling any better now, Remus?

REMUS: I wish, but the truth is that I’m not. I feel… I don’t know, like an octopus out of water, like… this was not my place, and everyone living here knew it and looked at me like a freak. Normally I wouldn’t care about it, but now, I do, and I don’t know why.

JANUS: Maybe it’s because you’re feeling a sense of responsibility you have never felt before. You don’t care about the others’ opinion, but you’re scared to disappoint Roman. Am I wrong?

REMUS: Maybe. I didn’t want to do this at all. If I’m unwanted somewhere, I don’t need to set a foot there. We could have married anywhere, even if it couldn’t have been the double wedding we had planned with Logan and Patton. But when Roman begged me like that the other day. I knew it was really important for him, and I acquiesced.

JANUS: You really love your brother, right?

REMUS: Yes, I do. Despite all, and even in my worst times, when I was enduring the worst isolation, I could never stop loving him. If this is important for him, I’ll do it.

[Janus holds Remus’ hand]

JANUS: I knew under all that exterior of madness and randomness of yours, there was a heart of gold. It’s just a little rusty of not using for a long time, but it’s gold nonetheless.

[Remus smiles lovingly at Janus, then kisses him. Meanwhile, Roman and Virgil are in their room]

VIRGIL: Roman, you look so worried.

ROMAN: I am worried, Virge. Very much.

VIRGIL: About Remus?

ROMAN: Of course. I’m afraid I’ve placed on his shoulders too much weight to handle, all for my selfish wish to force my two brothers to get along. Maybe I’m hoping for the impossible and I’m about to do more harm than good.

VIRGIL: Well, from the moment we welcomed Remus into the team, we all knew we had to tackle Roland and Remus’ relationship one day or another.

ROMAN: Yes, you’re right, but still… I don’t know how this week is gonna end. I’m imagining all the worst-case scenarios and it’s driving me mad.

VIRGIL: [understanding smirk] Welcome to my world, Roman.

ROMAN: And you have to deal with this all the time? Gosh, Virgil, I don’t know how you can handle this.

VIRGIL: When worrying is all that you’ve known in your life, you become used to it. For me it’s my natural state of living at this point. Except when I get too heightened or Thomas goes into a panic attack. In those times, not even I could endure the pressure and I break down, just like anybody else in those scenarios. But my job is to try and maintaining the balance of tension between vigilance and anxiety, and I must try to be strong to maintain it as much as possible.

ROMAN: Well, kudos, my love. I admire your strength so much.

[Roman kisses Virgil on the cheek. Virgil gives him a heartwarming smile]

VIRGIL: You’re welcome. And I wouldn’t worry too much in advance in this case. I think Remus looks pretty capable of dealing with this, and if he loves you, which I think he does, he’ll do everything he can to make this work.

ROMAN: I know he will… But on the other hand, I’m also worrying about Roland. This is a huge struggling situation for him and I essentially pushed him into it against his will. Maybe he wasn’t ready for this ordeal.

VIRGIL: He loves you too, so he’ll do his best too. Let’s hope for the best.

ROMAN: Let’s hope so, indeed.

[someone knocks at the door]

ROMAN: Come in!

[a servant opens the door]

SERVANT: Your highness, the regent prince asks to meet you, alone.

ROMAN: My brother? Okay, I’m coming. Will you be all right, Virge?

VIRGIL: Yes, I’ll be fine. After I have retouched my eyeshadow, I’ll go hang out with Thomas and the others. Look for me in their room if you don’t find me here when you return.

ROMAN: Okay, see ya later, Virge.

[Roman gets out of the room and follows the servant to Roland’s desk room]

SERVANT: [announcing him at the door] Your Royal Highness, Prince Roman!

ROLAND: Hi, Roman, come in.

[Roman enters the room, then the servant leaves and closes the door behind him]

ROMAN: Is everything okay, Roland?

ROLAND: Yes… yes, it’s fine, it’s fine.

ROMAN: [sitting down next to Roland] Are you sure? Ira told me about the teapot.

ROLAND: Oh, he shouldn’t have. I didn’t want you to worry about me.

ROMAN: As if not knowing it would have spared me the concern. I’ve been worrying about you for days already.

ROLAND: I’m so sorry, Roman.

ROMAN: Don’t be, I’m your big brother, it’s my job to worry about my little brother. Who else would, otherwise?

ROLAND: That was when we were kids, Roman. Now we’re both adults, we’re supposed to be able to take care of ourselves without making others worry about us.

ROMAN: If only that was true. But it isn’t. It’s only natural that we worry about the people we love and their well-being. That’s part of being family. And we’re family, right?

ROLAND: A very atypical family, though. Sometimes I’m still confused about if I should call you brother or father because you created me in this world as your brother.

ROMAN: As you said when you learned the truth, I’m family either way, so does it really matter?

ROLAND: No, I guess not.

ROMAN: Okay, you asked me to come, and here I am, so what is it?

ROLAND: Yes, I was thinking that this afternoon, after lunch, we could all go to the beach in front of the castle, to spend the rest of the first day having some fun. I’ll be free then to join you. If you want, of course, we can do whatever you want if you had something else in mind.

ROMAN: Sounds like a great plan, Roland. I’m sure the others will agree too when I tell them.

ROLAND: Then it is settled. Now, since you’re here, perhaps we could spend… five boring minutes together as I bring you up to date about the principality. I need to know if you agree with the choices I made, you’re the real Royal Prince after all and it’s your duty too.

ROMAN: [sighs with a smirk] Okay, brother. Bore me.

[Roman and Roland start talking about the principality’s administration while looking at some documents on the desk. Time goes by and it’s the afternoon. The gang is at the beach. Ira and Janus are lying on some deck chairs, under an umbrella, wearing a bath suit and sunglasses. The others are all in the water, Remus splashing at Roman who complains about it, Patton trying not to go too far from the shore as he can’t see anything without glasses. Logan is next to him trying to protect him, even though he’s as blind as him without his own glasses. The rest just enjoy the water on their own. Janus and Ira look at the others]

IRA: The water looks fine. Don’t you want to join them, Jan? Oh, it’s still weird to me to call you Jan instead of Dee. I can call you Jan, right?

JANUS: Of course you can, Ira. And nah, I’m not in the mood for swimming. Maybe because I still remember my days as a real snake, when I was a cold-blooded creature and I preferred sunbaths better than water baths. What about you? You don’t want to join them? Don’t feel obligated to stay with me just to give me company. I could take the time to take a little nap while you have fun.

IRA: I’m much better here, having a tranquil rest. A palace can be hard work sometimes, you know?

JANUS: You know what? I’m glad you bring this up now that we’re alone, because I’m often wondering something.

IRA: What is it?

JANUS: Is it okay for you to be a servant of Roland in exchange of living here? Working all day, doing the castle’s chores till you get exhausted… I thought you came here as his personal protector, not as his butler, and I purposely used that word instead of “slave” so as not to talk bad about Roland. I don’t know… you once were a full Side of your own and it hurts me to see you down to this, if you know what I mean.

IRA: I understand your concern and I appreciate the sentiment, but it’s not what you think. When I first came here, Roland treated me with so much reverence, as if I was almost… like a god of some kind. He didn’t let me do anything in the castle and treated me as if I was the true owner of this principality. I had my own servants to do everything for me and… it got a little stressing, not to mention that I got really bored after days went by without doing anything. So, it was me who suggested him to let me do the chores in the castle. At first he refused, but when I talked about how I was feeling, he acquiesced. I told him from the first minute that I wanted him to tell me what needed to be done as soon as it needed to be done, so I could stay busy, and so it has been up until today. So don’t worry, Janus. I’m totally fine and I’m doing this on my own free will.

JANUS: Okay, if you say so. You know I didn’t mean to be rude to Roland, I just wanted to make sure you were okay.

IRA: I know. You’ve always looked after me ever since the Dark Realm days, and I’ll always thank you for your friendship.

JANUS: My pleasure.

[Ira smiles at Janus, then looks at the sea. After a few seconds, his smile fades away and is replaced by a face of fear]

JANUS: Is there… something wrong, Ira?

IRA: Where is Roland? I can’t see him anywhere.

[Janus looks for Roland too]

JANUS: You’re right… He’s gone!

[Janus and Roland get up and run to the sea, next to Patton and Logan who are the ones closer to them]

IRA: Guys! Roland is missing! Where is Roland!?

PATTON: I… I don’t know, kiddos, I can’t see without my glasses.

JANUS: [carrying both glasses and giving them to Logan and Patton] Here guys, put them on.

[Logan and Patton put their glasses on]

LOGAN: You’re right, Roland is missing… And Remus too, I can’t see him anywhere either.

IRA: What is going on here? [yelling, calling the others] Guys! Guys, Roland and Remus are missing! Guys!

[the others hear them and start looking in all directions, trying to find them. Roman swims next to the beach]

ROMAN: I hope nothing happened to them.

[suddenly, Remus rises up from under the water]

IRA: Look, there is Remus, he was diving into the sea. But where is Roland!?

[Remus swims calmly without any concern at all]

IRA: Why is Remus so calm!? Did he have anything to do with this? This is suspicious as heck!

ROMAN: Remus! Remus, come here at once!

REMUS: What? I can’t hear you!

ROMAN: [yelling as loud as his lungs allow him] I SAID COME HERE, RIGHT NOW!

REMUS: Okay!

[Remus swims next to the others]

REMUS: What’s the matter?

IRA: You tell us! Where is Roland?

REMUS: What? Roland? What do I know?

ROMAN: Remus, if you know anything about where he is, tell us now, before it’s too late!

REMUS: I’m telling you I don’t know where the f… [bleep] Roland is!

IRA: Yeah, Roland and you disappear at the same time, then you emerge out of the water and swim as if it had nothing to do with you while we’re all worried about him. And you expect us to believe you don’t know anything!

REMUS: Listen, you damn ladybug, I’m telling you I know nothing about this! I was diving calmly, watching some octopuses underwater, and when I came out I didn’t know that your little prince was missing! Janus, say something!

[Janus hesitates. Remus shows a face of huge hurt]

REMUS: You don’t believe me either? I thought you could distinguish between lies and truths! I’m saying the truth right now, please believe me!

JANUS: [after looking at Remus’ face for a couple of seconds] He’s saying the truth. He’s had nothing to do with Roland’s disappearance.

IRA: Sorry, Janus, but you are too attached to Remus. Forgive me if I take your judgment with a pinch of salt. Not saying that you’re lying on purpose, but maybe your love for him could be fooling you.

IAN: Look! He’s there, behind that rock! He’s floating on the water!

IRA: [horrified] Oh, no!

ROMAN: [also horrified] Remus, what have you done?

REMUS: [in despair] I did nothing! I swear! You have to believe me!

[Roman swims to the place Ian pointed at, until he reaches Roland. He’s unconscious, floating on the water]

ROMAN: [horrified] Oh, my goodness gracious, Roland! No!

[when he touches Roland, he flinches and opens his eyes]

ROLAND: [scared] What!? What’s going on!?

[Roland sinks into the water, getting out as quickly as he can, then looks at Roman and takes some ear plugs out of his ears]

ROMAN: Roland, you’re alive! Thank goodness, you scared the sh** [bleep] out of me!

ROLAND: I’m… sorry, Roman, I was floating on the water, with my ear plugs so that water didn’t enter my ears. I guess I got so relaxed that I fell asleep for a moment. I’m sorry I scared you.

ROMAN: Then that means… [looking at Remus, who watches the scene from afar] Oh, Remus!

[Roman returns as fast as he can to where Remus and the others are. Roland follows him from behind]

ROMAN: Remus, I’m so sorry!

REMUS: [serious face] How could you honestly believe I could do that to you, even for a second?

IRA: Well, it wouldn’t have been, like, the first time you had tried to do that…

REMUS: [yelling in a sudden outburst of wrath] I’m talking to my brother, not to you! I don’t give a f… [bleep] sh… [bleep] about what you think about me, you fake doodle! But I do care about Roman’s opinion and…

[tears burst out of his eyes. Remus turns around, then gets out of the water and approaches the deck chairs, not facing the others, who follow him a few steps behind]

ROMAN: I have no excuse. I can only tell you that I’m sorry and that I should have trusted you from the start.

REMUS: Yes, you should have. But you didn’t. And it seems no matter what I do to be better, you’ll never fully trust me, right?

[Remus makes a gesture and he’s dressed with his usual outfit]

REMUS: I’m not in the mood for more… beaching around. I’m going to my room, I want to be alone.

JANUS: Remus, I…

REMUS: I said alone, Janus. I don’t want you to follow me either.

JANUS: Okay… As you wish, Remus.

[Remus walks two steps, then, with a broken voice, he looks at Janus, with his eyes wet and red, and speaks]

REMUS: What hurts me the most is that… even you, Janus, had doubts about me… Even you, my love, thought me capable of…

[before Janus can answer, Remus starts running towards the castle. They can’t see his face, but they all notice clearly that he’s crying]

[to be continued, guys, gals and non binary pals]

[end card]

ROLAND: I’m sorry I have been the cause of this terrible misunderstanding.

IRA: No, it’s my fault, I didn’t give Remus a chance.

ROMAN: It’s not your fault only, Ira. You were driven by concern over Roland’s life, as much as me, and we were all unfair to Remus.

IRA: But still, what I said is true, he did try to do harm to Roland once, so to claim that he’s not capable of doing such thing is false. I was wrong and I’m really sorry, but even so, I had a high chance of being right. You all know it.

LOGAN: But you’re judging an old version of Remus, a Remus that is long gone. The Remus of today may be a lunatic, but he’s not a murderer. Humans evolve all the time and we, Sides, as we’re part of a human, do too. Do I need to remind you of your first entrance in the living room, Ira, and how much you changed afterwards?

IRA: I… [sighs] I guess you’re right.

THOMAS: Well, getting to know who is right or wrong or who to blame is not important. The important thing right now is to make sure that Remus is okay and apologize to him.

JANUS: I’ll go see him.

ROMAN: But he said he wanted to be alone.

JANUS: I’m the one who has the most to apologize for. I’m his fiancee. How am I supposed to start a marriage if I fail in the most basic idea of marriage, which is trust. I need to talk to him, in the name of all of you but also and mostly in the name of me, because I failed him.

ROLAND: Again, I’m so sorry I’ve been the cause of so much pain for all of you. I didn’t mean…

JANUS: It’s not your fault at all, Roland. Okay, I’ll go see him. I hope at least he lets me in the room.

[Janus heads to the castle while the others look at him with faces of remorse]

PATTON: Who would have thought this day that seemed to be so happy would end so badly. I hope Remus and Janus can amend things.

ROMAN: And I hope he can forgive us too…

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hellfiremaniac · 4 years

Text

My Sanders Sides Writing, Part 2

This is the continuation of my Sanders Sides writing. I hope you all enjoy!

---------------------------------------

Roman sat up out of bed, his breathing fast and his heart racing. The dream was so real, he could still taste the misty air and hear the river rushing in the distance. Clutching his heart, he slowly proceeded to leave the warm cocoon of his bed, beginning to get dressed and ready for the day ahead of him. He, however, forgot to take notice of the darkness that was present outside the window, and it took him until he was outside of Remus's room - across the hall from his own room - before he realized the lack of servants and the subsequent darkness around him. He let out an irritated huff of air, already in his daily outfit and knowing that he'd be unable to sleep, and he decided that it might do him some good to go on a walk outside of the castle limits. He'd been within it's boundaries for days, and was starting to miss the trails of the forest.

Deciding it best to allow Remus some more sleep - he's more axe-murdery when tired - Roman made his way out of the castle using one of the many secret passageways that he and Remus used as kids to mess with people. It came in handy during games of hide-and-seek. He didn't encounter anyone to disrupt his trip, and he soon came to the usual trail that he used when travelling into the forest that surrounded one half of the castle, and most of their kingdom, leaving it secluded, and well defended when attacked by people that didn't understand the dense woods as well as the kingdoms inhabitants.

It was after a few minutes of walking that Roman spotted the small, recently trodden path leading off the main track, barely visible to a normal passerby, but obvious to the well trained guard-captain, who took it upon himself to investigate immediately. The path got hard to follow in some places, dark enough to stump someone with the best of sight, and in others was covered in bushed that he chose to go around, always falling back to the path. The heavy morning mist hung in the air, and it wasn't very long before the sound of flowing water reached his ears, and he came to a small clearing between the trees. It was round, and was barely noticeable with the close together trees surrounding it, making it difficult to enter, and seemingly impossible to escape. Roman knew better than to enter, but a small, whispering voice in his head drew him to the clearing, and he passed into it before he knew what he was doing.

There was a man standing there. Draped in yellow and wearing a hat, standing at the opposite end from where Roman entered the space. He didn't show any signs of acknowledgement for the extra person, and seemed to be unresponsive until Roman was close to him.

Cursing silently, Roman noted the absence of his own sword, but figured that he could beat the man in a hand to hand fight if necessary. The man chuckled as that thought went through Roman's head, and he finally began to speak.

"Now now, no need to get ahead of yourself there. I just wanted to talk." His voice had a slight hissing sound added to it, like the kind you'd expect a snake to have, and he kept his head tilted towards the ground, where Roman noticed he was leaning on a cane that he didn't see before.

"What do you want to talk about?" Roman's voice was filled with suspicion, and the strange man tilted his head in response.

"I want to offer you a chance to have the thing that you want most in life." Roman's heart beat faster against his will, and he was now very interested in what the man had to say, "Now, I know that you will try to deny it, but you won't fool me, I'm the master of lies. What you want, is something you thought you could never have." The man paused to let the noises of the forest fill the clearing, and Roman was too caught up to notice the lack of animal noises, and despite the light being in greater amounts than before, the clearing remained dark, "You want to be king!"

Roman was thrown off by the accuracy and certainty in the claim, and instinctively began shaking his head, "No, I don't want that, Thomas is a great king, one of the best!"

"But what if I told you that you could be a king, without harming Thomas or your other friends in any way?"

Roman stared at the man, unable to make out his features in the dim light of dawn, and found himself beginning to nod, "IF you could guarantee no harm to them, then I will accept what you are offering."

Unbeknownst to Roman, a smirk had appeared on the man's face, and he tipped his hat towards Roman, pulling a large basket of roses from behind his back, "Alright. All you need to do is distribute these roses to the towns people, and any of the castle folk that you can. Come to me when this task is completed." Roman nodded, happily accepting the basket from the man.

"Alright, thank you! How do I get back?"

"Leave that you me, your majesty." Roman was filled with joy, loving the title he had been given from the man.

Right before he said that he was ready to leave, Roman faltered, turning towards him, "You're offering me something so kind, but where are my manners? What's your name?"

The man smiled, this one seeming genuine to the star struck captain, and offered his right hand for a hand shake. Roman took the gloved hand, and the man spoke once more, "My name is Janus."

When Roman looked around again, he was back in his room, and bright light was flooding it, making him blink rapidly to regain his sight. He found the basket of red roses on the table next to his bed, and he happily took a bunch of them, dashing out of the room and handing them to people that he passed by, barely noticing who they are. Before long, Roman slammed directly into someone, and he fell backwards, quickly being caught by the person that knocked him over.

"Whoa there, Roman, slow down. What will people say if I, the better twin, accidentally kill my lesser counterpart? There would be a deep sadness about my having no one to fuck with." Remus's voice was very evident above him, and Roman was let go by him. He thanked Remus, shoving one of the roses into his hands before exiting the castle.

Roman missed the disgust filled look that Remus cast towards the flower, crushing it between his hands while muttering, “I fucking hate roses. Bastard flowers.”

Roman headed off towards the village, and the people living there all seemed overjoyed when they were handed the roses, and Roman felt an amazing sense of accomplishment from making them happy, but the selfish part of his mind reminded him that this was all for himself, a reminded which he ignored.

By the middle of the day, Roman had returned to the castle, and had handed the last few of the roses out to the best trained guards, running out before the recruits could get some, which he didn't care much about. Roman was mildly surprised to hear the familiar whispering voice in his mind, "Great job, now meet me in the clearing, we can progress from there, my king."

Roman dropped the basket on the ground below him, failing to notice the eyes of his brother trailing after him, and the footsteps that followed him, stopping outside the clearing. The man was still hard to see when Roman arrived, and his anticipation prevented him from sensing the danger that lingered around him.

"Welcome back, my king. I have brought you a temporary crown, which we will replace upon your coronation as a real king." Roman eagerly nodded his agreement, bowing his head slightly to allow Janus to place the crown of roses upon his head. As soon as he righted his head, feeling the weight of the crown of his head, he winced in pain feeling the thorns begin to dig into his head.

"Janus, it hurts. Take it off." He looked into Janus's eyes, jolting in fear when he saw them for the first time. One normal, one reptilian, with a face to match. The scales covering part of Janus's face were the least of Roman's problems however, as the crown became increasingly rooted on his head.

When the thorns had finished implanting themselves in the naive man's scalp, Janus let out a small laugh, "And now, you will be king. But you won't be in control."

The once vivid red of the roses drained to a pale grey, turning yellow soon after. As Remus looked on at his twin and the man, he saw the light fade from Roman's eyes, becoming dull, and horror filled him as his vibrant twin was taken over by the man.

"Now, march to your kingdom, and take what is mine."

Roman turned to the clearings gap, beginning his walk to the castle, seeming to be in no hurry to get there. Remus dashed off through the trees as the man faded away, hoping to warn the others about the coming threat before it was too late to stop it.

What greeted him in the kingdom made his blood run cold, and he froze in place. Some of the villagers had the same distant look in their eyes as Roman, and they were chasing the non-blank villagers away from the kingdom, seeming to be in the process of a takeover. Remus shook off his shock, resuming his mad dash to the castle, arriving just in time to see Logan, Patton, Virgil, and the new recruits for the guard being thrown off the grounds, the gates being slammed shut behind them.

"Remus! Do you know what's going on?" Patton's voice was the first to call out at his arrival, and Remus barely managed to get enough air to speak.

"It's Roman, I think some strange man in the woods has him under some sort of mind control. He said something about taking what's his from the kingdom, and Roman being the king."

The three exchanged looks, silently debating about if Remus was lying, before the shouting of fearful citizens grabbed their attention, and they saw the controlled citizens throwing out the normal ones, and they seemed to come to a mutual decision of it being the truth.

"Well, what do we do now?" Logan didn't appear too panicked by it, but he could feel his heart beating fast, and tried his best to ignore it.

"We run. We regroup in the forest and decide from there. Now go!" Virgil answered for everyone, and his suddenly commanding voice directed everyone with their own mind away from the castle as fast as they could, and the people arrived in the forest just in time to see the figure of Roman entering the castle, the gates opening for him, and they heard the loud, echoing bang of the gates slamming shut once again, and a feeling of horror took over the whole group of escapees. "What are you waiting for? Let's go establish a shelter, and we need to find everyone that left earlier. Move!" Virgil seemed to be the best at taking charge right now, and Remus, Patton and Logan immediately moved into action to help direct the people as best as they can.

Nobody saw Virgil staring back at the castle, and Virgil didn't see the blank eyes of the new king staring back at him.

#Sanders Sides #Roman Sanders #Remus Sanders #Virgil Sanders #Logan Sanders #Patton Sanders #Janus Sanders #This is going to be fun #sanders sides fic

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starcats1219 · 2 years

Text

Surface Changes

Chapter 6

Masterpost - ao3 - previous chapter - next chapter

warnings: none

No. It couldn't be.

"No, this is not Virgil." Logan tried to keep his voice calm, "Who is this?"

There was a pause, the person on the other side of the wall clearly not expecting his response. As the silence dragged on, Logan had a sinking feeling he knew who he had found.

"This is Janus, isn't it? Or Remus?" He knew he wasn't doing a very good job hiding the dread in his voice, but after hearing about the two of them from Virgil, he had desperately hoped to find them and let them know their friend was safe. He was just hoping he wouldn't discover them in this way.

"...Who's asking? Why do you care?" The voice snapped back, defensive.

Logan supposed he couldn't blame them, after all, when a total stranger is asking you their name after being locked in a torture facility for an undetermined amount of time, of course, you would be skeptical.

"I know Virgil," he began, the shocked silence on the other side of the wall speaking louder than words ever could. "He's safe. You don't need to worry about him."

"Oh trust me," the voice said sarcastically, "we weren't worried. He escaped and left us here, and managed to drag you into this mess as well."

Logan was taken aback. From the way Virgil talked about the two, he clearly looked up to them and had just wanted them in safety as well. Clearly, though, that's not what these two understood from Virgil's actions.

He decided to approach with what he knew best. Cold, hard, facts. If he could explain where he was from and why he was here, the voice would most likely understand.

"I'm a field agent with the TSS, The Sanders Society, we deal with the supernatural and magical. Virgil came to us after escaping from here and told us about this place and about the two of you. He asked us to help you escape. I volunteered to come scope the place out and try and find the two of you, but I was caught and...well, I'm sure you know what the Dragon Witch does to those she discovers."

Again, silence from beyond the wall. Although, this time Logan got the sense it was contemplative. He could hear noises from beyond the wall, presumably whoever was in the cell next to his talking to the next one over, but he couldn't make out their words. After a moment, a quiet voice asked:

"She changed you too? What animal, what features?"

"Raven. Wings, talons, eyes. What about the two of you? I'm not actually sure who I've been talking to, so some clarification there would also be appreciated."

"Oh, of course. You've been talking to me, Janus. Remus is on the other side of me. You're currently in Virgil's old cell, he was never quite as close to Remus since it was hard for the two of them to communicate, I am, or was, mostly the middle man for us all to chat. I'm merged with a snake, python to be specific. Scales, fangs and eye, all on one side of my body. The other is completely fine. Strange, huh? Remus got an octopus, he's got a couple of tentacles, not as many as an actual octopus, four or so. Besides that I'm not totally sure of all his specific features, seeing as we've never seen one another before."

Even knowing that was probably the case, the information still took Logan by surprise. Three people, who had never seen one another, still managed to have such a close bond and cared so much about each other's safety.

Logan cleared his throat.

"Well, Janus, and Remus by extension I suppose, it's been quite nice to meet you, though I wish they were under better circumstances."

"Indeed."

Roman slammed his fist on the table.

"I don't care that it's not proper procedure! It's been days without any word from Logan, something has got to be wrong!"

Thomas had called him, Virgil, Patton, and some other higher-ups to discuss the Dragon Witch and Logan's mission. No one had heard from him since the day he left for the mission, nearly a week prior, and they were starting to get worried. While Roman and Patton were desperate to get out onto the field and find their partner, some of the higher-ups were insistent that they could do nothing, unless a distress signal had been sent, or two weeks had passed with no communication.

"It's the proper procedure," they argued, waving the agency's handbook in the air, "after all, perhaps he's been wildly successful, and reaching out would end in his capture."

Roman wanted to take the handbook out of their hands and smack their smug faces. This wasn't some random, low-stakes case where the agent would walk away with nothing but a broken leg (he scowled down at his own cast, the healing process sped up by some of the magical medics in the agency). They had seen what the Dragon Witch did to those she found, Virgil wasn't born with spider legs and cuts all over him, they were done to him, by cold-hearted people that had no sense of morality. And that was why Roman was scared for Logan. No matter what, the Logan that returned (if Logan returned, he thought grimly, before quickly banishing the thought from his head) would be a much different Logan than the one who had left for the mission all those days ago.

As all the higher-ups and Mr. Sanders quietly argued, and Patton and Virgil sat there silently, Roman decided he had had enough. He stood up, drawing attention to himself, before announcing:

"I don't care what you all decide, I'm going to go find Logan for myself."

He stormed out of Mr. Sanders' office, slamming the door to shocked faces. Almost immediately, the door opened again, Patton and Virgil exiting the tense meeting space. Roman held up a hand.

"Whatever you two want to say, drop it, nothing you say will convince me to let this go. Logan needs our help, I can feel it."

Patton took his hand gently.

"We weren't going to stop you, Roman. We want to help."

"I-what?"

Patton laughed softly, the most genuine he had sounded in days. The three of them had grown tenser as each day without contact went by, but they were slowly letting that go.

"You think you could do this by yourself? Roman, be realistic. You've just broken your leg, and just because the magic healers were able to speed up the process by a few weeks doesn't mean it's all better, it's still weak. Besides, you don't think I'm not worried too? Logan was my friend, Roman. Just because you guys were field partners doesn't mean you're the only one who cares about him."

Roman stared at Patton for a moment, before nodding slowly. Patton grinned.

"Perfect! We'll go get ready then. Come on, Virge!"

"Woah Woah Woah, I never said he could come."

Patton looked him up and down before meeting his eyes.

"And why shouldn't he be able to come? He wants to."

Roman sputtered.

"Because he, he doesn't even know Logan! Why the hell would he care what happens to him? No one else here seems to!"

Patton opened his mouth to retort, but Virgil stopped him, shaking his head slightly. He walked forwards, until he was directly in front of Roman, his piercing eyes meeting Roman's confused and hurt ones.

"He's there to save my friends," the spider-infused man began, "it's only fair I help his friends in return."

Roman softened. As the week passed, Virgil seemed to come out of his shell a bit. While still skittish and often quiet, he was more comfortable in the agency, and more specifically in Patton and Roman's presence. They didn't know if it was because Logan was helping his friends, or because they had been kind to him right from the start, but the traumatized man tried to stick by their sides whenever possible.

Roman clapped his hands, startling Patton and Virgil who looked at him with uncertainty.

"Well then," he said, "let's get a move on. We have a rescue to plan, after all!"

The two of them grinned, sagging with relief. They rushed off to pack their things. Once they had left, Roman closed his eyes and breathed deeply.

He really hoped Logan was okay. Because if anyone had caused him any harm, there would be hell to pay.

#Surface Change #sanders sides #fanfiction #ts big bang #logan sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders

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