#but Nesta is evil and awful

[wolfnesta]

I just want to make sure I’m understood. I dislike Rhys for the position the narrative constantly takes for him not so much his actions. I would not care about his flaws so much if they weren’t constantly praised. Not even looking for accountability necessarily, because *realism* I guess, but really Just some acknowledgment is all. And the opposite is the reason why I will die ferally fighting for my girl Nesta Archeron

[olenvasynyt]

In ACOWAR during the meeting with Kier when he asks for his people to be free of the mountain, Feyre says “You have every comfort, and it’s still not enough?”

She had every comfort at Tamlin’s manor, and it still wasn’t enough for her…

#freethecourtofnightmares2024

One thing that really pisses me off about the Court of Nightmares is how SJM writes it so black and white. The entire court, not just Keir, is evil and conniving. There was a part in ACOWAR where he says he is going to let the CoN go to Velaris but he told all of the vendors and business owners to refuse service to not just Keir, but all of the CoN. And this paints the entire court in this black and white lense.

Not a single person in that court is a dreamer like Mor? She was the only fucking one?

I think there can be a little bit of nuance to the situation where a significant portion of the court is just bad because they have been festering in the dark for so long, but guess who's fault is that?? It's the leader's fault, the one who keeps the court up and running, aka the High Lord, aka Rhys.

Rhys says he wants change. That he wants to show the world that he's good. But he continues to keep the Court of Nightmares up and running, he keeps Keir as herald.

"Oh this court is so awful and sadistic," Feyre thinks as she sits on the throne with a crown on her head and with Rhys holding her hand.

And Rhys says "the Court of Nightmares just rules itself" and sure, I guess that's true, but as High Lord, you have the ability to put a stop to that and pull out the bad weeds. But instead, you keep it running to further your agenda and to keep your evil mask on.

Getting mad at Keir for slutshaming your lover and breaking his arm is not enough. Restricting access to Velaris is not enough. Even telling the Court "you guys are bad >:C " is not fucking enough.

Rhys the most powerful High Lord who killed all of the Illyrian war bands who sided with Amarantha after UTM, yet he can't do the same to the CoN?

Rhys and Feyre and the IC label the entire CoN as evil without trying to find the forgotten dreamers, and they continue to keep the court up and running and making the excuse that "it's too hard" despite their power and influence. It means they don't care. Or that Rhys maybe fucking enjoys it.

It also means that SJM (so far) has no idea what she's doing and can't understand the situation she wrote in her own series.

And this brings me to comparing Nesta being locked up, the CoN and its dreamers being locked up, and Feyre being locked up. Is SJM intending this irony and hypocrisy of the IC? I sure hope so because I swear it's the most obvious comparision ever, but it confuses me because a large majority of the ACOTAR fanbase doesn't get it. "Oh well the CoN is evil! They have to keep them contained and Rhys can't do a whole lot as High Lord because the Court rules itself." And the most frustrating argument: "Nesta was addicted to sex and alcohol, she needed to be rehabilitated! It's for her own good!"

They don't see the irony of how the IC treats Nesta because Tamlin also did what he did for Feyre's own good. It was to protect her, keep her safe. Not saying it was 100% good and right, but why are we not understanding that what the IC did to Nesta was not 100% good and right either?

[ellievickstar]

His Second Choice?

A/N: So my first ever fic was Azriel angst…thus, this. I have curated what I consider to be the worst thing of all time, being someone’s second choice, especially if you are their soulmate.

Summary: When then mating bond finally snaps into place, what are you meant to do when you realise your mate has another in his heart, will you break it off to save yourself, or will your mate be able to save this heartbreak?

Request: N/A

Pairing: Azriel x Witch!Reader, Azriel x Elain, Nessian, Feysand.

Warnings: Angst. Tears. Mentions of witchcraft. Elain Slander. Being someone’s second option. (If you are in a similar situation, BREAK IT OFF. He or she is not worth it), Azriel being incredibly stupid. Elain slander. Thanks to @azrielhours for helping me come up with the idea! I also added my own take of the Hanahaki Disease with Azzy. Hope you enjoy, love you babes <3

My Masterlists & Rules

~*~*~*~*~

You walked down the hall, and noticed that there was a slight bounce in your step, smiling as you recalled the reason why. Today was finally the day, after weeks of going on countless missions for Rhys, Azriel could finally have dinner with you as usual, and just in time to. Today you were celebrating finally being able to finish the last book of your series, quite popular now, no doubt thanks to Feyre's connections to a famous publisher, which allowed the series to get the exposure it needed. (A/N: Is this how publishing books work? Someone please educate me)

Thanks to the help of Mor and Nesta's fashionable taste in dresses, they had picked out a wonderful dress. It was a dark navy blue, azriel's favourite colour, which faded into white with golden accents. The sleeves were off the shoulder, lined with flowers sewn and embroidered into the top. You were in absolute awe when you saw it and had tried it on immediately, thankfully it fit you well, and you wished the two females well before heading to bottom of the stairs to the House of Wind, where Azriel agreed to pick you up.

You wondered what he'd think as you fidgeted with the layers of your dress, occasionally summoning spells to pass time. During the first hour, you just played with your magic, bored. During the second hour, you begun to worry that he might have been injured during the mission. During the third, you were ready to summon Rhys

That's when Cassian and Nesta came across you and asked you why you weren't with Azriel and you made a painful realisation.

You had stood there, waiting like a fool. Thinking that maybe, your mate would still care enough to at least show up if he was tired from his mission. Stood there, until Nesta and Cassian came across you, Nesta demanding to know where Azriel was, Cassian puzzled as he claimed Azriel had come home hours before. And that's when you knew he had forgotten. And it hurt.

You shouldn't have been upset. After all, he could have been so tired and just landed in bed immediately, he could have been flooded with paperwork for the mission. Cassian offered to bring you to the House of Wind but y ou waved him off, telling him to enjoy the rest of his night with Nesta and not to worry about you.

You couldn't winnow. But you could do something else. After ensuring that no one could see you, you waved a hand in the air. Drawing precise shapes from memory. A light glowed in your hand, slowly swallowing your arm, then the rest of you. And when you closed your eyes because of how bright it was you felt the atmosphere shift. And with your fingers crossed you opened one eye, then the other, to see yourself standing in the living room of the House of Wind.

Witchcraft.

You had grown up as a witch, travelling across Prythian with your family and friends. That was before Amarantha's rule, before...everything. Before you witnessed you family slaughtered. Before you mustered up so much power you shouldn't even be alive. Before your friends needed to go into hiding. Before everyone thought witches were evil. And it wasn't just you. Bryaxis, was something of an old friend. You were no stranger to the weaver, the bone carver or the suriel. They had all been...friends. And such association with had had cause your kind to be deemed evil.

So you hid your power, you hid your identity. The only people you ever told was the inner circle, save Feyre's two sisters. You weren't comfortable with sharing it with new people, and everyone understood. You had told Nesta vague details, but tears had begun to form in your eyes and she embraced you, telling you that it was alright if you didn't wish to speak of it yet.

The memory made you smile. But once you remembered the situation at hand, it turned into a frown. Reaching out to that mating bond, you grasped it, but there was nothing on the pother side. Though Azriel was your lover, he hadn't experienced the bond for himself yet. You would wait for it to click for him, you didn't want to rush him.

Laughter caught your attention, and the distinct sound of your mate made you freeze as you faced the balcony. There they were. It was clear as day as your mate entered the House of Wind with Elain. Elain. You'd known that they had grown closer, but to leave you with no explanation and spend time with someone else. You blanched.

Azriel's eyes found yours and as they trailed down to your dress, the colour drained from his face. He truly had forgotten. Not for any rhyme or reason but because he was busy with someone else. Your vision began to blur, but you swallowed as you asked him one thing.

"Why?" It was so soft, you couldn't recognise your own voice. But Azriel flinched. You searched for an answer in his eyes but found none as he looked away. You begged him silently for a good reason, a good answer, anything but-

"I guess I just forgot, and she needed me for something important," It was as if he had slapped you. Turning away, tears streamed down your face, and with a wave of your hand a blinding light flashed and you were gone. Azriel left on his knees as he had tried to grab you, to convince you to stay, to let him make up for what he had forgotten, but never once thought about what he had just said, what he had just implied.

~*~*~*~*~

"He didn't!" Mor gasped. You nodded sadly and Nesta huffed as she sat back in her chair. Feyre was quiet as she stirred her tea. You couldn't imagine how they both felt. On one hand, Elain was their sister, but to even attempt on a man who already had a lover was beyond both of them. Feyre shook her head, in disbelief and disappointment. She exchanged looks with Nesta and cleared her throat.

"Perhaps, we sheltered Elain all her life, but it is no excuse for what she is doing, whether she realises it or not. I will speak to her about the issue at hand, but don't worry, I won't tell her about the bond," You smiled gratefully at the high lady and she excused herself to go to the bathroom. You couldn't help but be envious of the relationship she had. Though you would never want to date the High Lord, you wished that Azriel would care for you as much as Rhys did Feyre.

Sighing, you set your cup down, ready to leave for a meeting with Bryaxus - who was more than overjoyed when you begun to regularly visit him - and then you felt it, it was like your heart was being ripped out of you as you gasped, heaving, coughing. Mor sat up, alarmed, and Nesta moved to hold your back, soothing you. You hacked and watched in horror as blood and what looked like the petals of a flower came spewing out of your mouth.

You knew this disease.

You knew what it would do.

You knew what needed to be done.

"Get Madja," You coughed out to Mor, "Now! I need her now!" Raising your voice, you began to cough up more petals and more blood. Mor instantly winnowed out and was back within a few minutes, Madja hot on her heels as she rushed towards you. Your mind spun as you processed everything. Not this, anything but this, please.

After your coughing fit that scared the wits out of Mor and Nesta, you explained the disease to them. Madja nodded at your every word as she inspected the kind of flowers that you had coughed up.

Red Tulips. Soulmates.

Marigolds. Hurt.

Daffodils. Unrequited Love.

You cursed under your breath. Feyre had just returned and was quickly filled in on the situation. She paled as she took in the flowers, their meanings. Hours of listening to what Elain said flowers represented and now Feyre wish she had forgotten all of it. You started heaving again and Madja made you lean forward as you coughed up more petals into a paper bag.

Unbridled pain roared through the veins of your body as it began to come in paves. Whimpering, you brought your knees to your chest, but the coughing didn't stop. You were in near tears. How could you let this happen? Years of hearing about this disease and you were now victim to it. You couldn't help that your mate was in love with another, but why was this so much worse than the stories? You had seen the events of the disease transpire and it was no where near as bad-

"It's because you and Azriel are mates. In other cases, this only happens between two lovers...never mates. Mates usually have an instant connection, so it's very rare for one half to love another person entirely," Feyre explained. Nesta muttered something about how Tamlin should have gotten this cursed disease, but Feyre then explained that there was a difference between 'love' and 'obsession'. This couldn't be happening. You groaned into your palms, maybe you should go to the bathroom, lest the next thing you know you can't move.

Standing up, you took one step, then another, your vision bagan to tunnel, and you turned back to the sofa. You had to at least get back to a lying down position, but before you could, darkness hugged you like a warm, welcoming blanket.

~*~*~*~*~

Mor yelped as she rushed to keep Y/N from falling. Feyre immediately reaching out to Rhys to get everyone to go to the House of Wind immediately. It was an emergency. Rhys was there with Lucien in a heartbeat. For a second, Mor wondered where Azriel was, when booming beats of wings could be heard. Cassian rushing in, letting out a sigh of relief as he spied that Nesta was safe, Azriel with Elain in his arms entering soon after as he set her down.

Feyre, Mor and Nesta all scowled at the Shadow singer, assuming that it was because of Y/N he nodded at them apologetically. Which in turn made them all exchange enraged looks, Feyre making a mental note to tell Rhys to cut Azriel's hefty salary by at least half. Still a sizeable portion, but maybe he's start thinking about the consequences to his actions.

"We're here because of Y/N," Mor started and Elain scoffed. Feyre and Nesta were taken aback by the rude behaviour. Having enough of so many problems, Nesta spoke up. "Is there a problem, Elain?" Elain rolled her eyes and picked at her nails.

"Y/N is just jealous that Azriel decided that he didn't want to be with her anymore. Besides, there are so many other males for her, why those she have to target Azriel?" Nesta gritted her teeth, ready to yell at her ignorant sister, but decided against it as Mor began to speak.

"Y/N has contracted something called Hanahaki Disease, a disease cause my unrequited love towards another," This made Elain snort, but Mor continued, ignoring her, "Usually there would be time to try several cures, but in this case, it's..." More trailed off, unable to find the words, unable to utter the thing that would confirm her own fears. Feyre continued for her.

"She's dying. Fast. Madja says we have a day at best, hours at worse," The words were almost unheard, Cassian stared at Nesta, the devastation on her face, he glanced to Azriel, the bastard's face remained impassive, but as he reached to his mind, absolute chaos. Pain. Suffering.

Azriel felt paralysed when he heard the words. He might never be able to make up for the mistake he made. The hurt he caused his lover. But, something made him stop.

"You said usually, there would be more time. What's the difference in this case?" The question made Feyre pause. She glanced at her sister and friend but they both looked unsure. Should they tell him? They had sworn not to tell anyone but in a situation like this...

"You are her mate," Nesta softly muttered. So soft, that if it wasn't for everyone's Fae hearing, they would have passed it off as the wind. Elain gasped ion anger, and Azriel fell to his knees. No. It can't be. He mustn't have heard it right. His mate? But as he reached into his soul, he grasped the at the foreign golden thread that was foreign to him all this time, and tugged it hard. Images flooded his mind and he begun to weep.

The shadow singer, hardened by years of battle, war, and torture, begun to weep as he saw an invisible golden thread reach out, and go through the door where his mate probably was. And for the first time in centuries, he understood her. He saw her pain, her memories, her thoughts.

Horrified, he witnessed himself saying those words to her. Telling her that Elain was more important, telling her that another female was more important than his mate. He wanted to know when she found out about the bond, wanted to demand why she never told him, but now wasn't the time. He needed to get to her.

Faster then anyone could stop him, he got to his feet and ran. Tearing through the door and stopped as he saw her. She was so pale, sweat beaded down her forehead as her breaths were laboured. She wasn't even conscious. Shadows sang as they danced around her figure. Not right. Dying. Sick. Disease.

He felt himself being pulled back by Cassian, asking him to calm down, asking him to listen, but he couldn't. He was panicked. He couldn't leave her, not again, he needed her. He couldn't lose her after just finding out. It took both Rhys and Cassian to haul Azriel away, he screamed after his mate, screamed as he prayed, he didn't know to who, but if there was any slight chance that they'd let her wake up, if there was at least one good thing he'd done in all his existence that allowed him this one good thing, he'd bargain with the Gods for a chance to live the rest of his life with his mate. Would bargain away his own life.

He didn't know how long it was until Madja came out with a solemn look. He didn't know how long it was he stood there when she uttered those defining words. "She might not make it," Before she dragged him to the side.

"What is your relationship with Y/N?" She demanded. Azriel's head spun as he tried to recall what happened. "I...it's complicated," Madja paused at seeing the shadow singer falter after 500 years of walking through life without a care in the world. However, the answer he was giving was not going to help her save Y/N.

"Define it shadow singer! Give me details! Let me know what was happening that she became so ill!" She snapped. Azriel flinched. He knew she had every right to be annoyed at him. He was the cause of the illness and he couldn't even think straight, couldn’t even try to save her.

“I hurt her. I hurt her and I shouldn’t have, I stood her up, and then told her another female was more important. I grew distant. And now she’s suffering. Because of me,” He swallowed and Madja nodded. He ran his hand through his hair. Panic danced in his eyes and Madja sighed. This was complicated, never in all her year did she need to treat such a complicated case, even when Illyrians were on the brink of losing their wings. Even when she had to treat battle wounds that would leave the faint hearted in shambles.

She shook her head, turning to leave, voicing only one instruction as she walked out, “Break off whatever relationship you have with that Archeron Sister, and pray that you’re mate will wake,” He nodded and Madja left the shadow singer feeling empty, feeling as if he had nothing left in the world.

~*~*~*~*~

His foot steps felt heavy as he walked to the living room of the House of Wind. He couldn't believe this. All his life, he'd dreamed of meeting his mate. He'd dreamed of living out his life together with her, and now he might not even get to right the wrongs he had made. He might not even get to tell her that he was sorry for hurting her.

"So? What do we need to do?" Mor demanded as he came into view of the rest. He sighed as looked down at his scarred palms, ones who had done harm to thousands and he hadn't regretted it, not once. Until now. His own mate. Maybe karma really did exist. Maybe he shouldn't have been so cruel to so many people.

"I...I have to break up with Elain or she dies tonight," He said shakily. Everyone stared at him. Elain rolled her eyes once more. “What a drama queen. She’s such an attention seeker, right guys?” She looked around but no one seemed to agree. Her eyes seemed to flicker between surprise and resentment. “You guys are stupid, she’s not dying she’s just faking it,” She tried to say but Cassian brought a hand up, stopping her.

“You, dumb brat. You’re sisters have shielded you all their lives and the one time you have an opportunity that you aren’t just an empty headed child, you blow it!” Nesta tried to calm him down but everyone could tell that a part of her agreed with what her mate was saying. Rhysand then chimed in, “A member of my court, one of my closest friends, is dying. And you have the audacity, the gall, to say that she is attention seeking? I don’t care that you are my mate’s sister, but that disrespect will not be tolerated in my court, even so, my mate would agree with me. You have been born and raised sheltered and shielded from a broken world and instead of being thankful, instead of feeling an ounce of appreciation towards the female who saved your damn life, you ruined hers.” Feyre nodded, and as Elain looked around, she realised that no one was siding with her, not even Lucien.

She huffed, enraged by the outcome of this, before strutting out of the house of Wind. Nesta felt disheartened, she had been so protective of Elain that she had now turned into this uncaring monster, it made her feel like she had failed. Her emotions were echoed down the bond and Cassian turned towards her and hugged her, pressing her against him gently. The scene made Azriel feel alone, and so guilty. He could have had that, if he had just opened his damn eyes, if he hadn’t hurt her the way he did.

But now, he didn’t even know if his mate was going to make the end of the day. And he prayed to whatever god there was out there, that he’d get one more shot to make things right.

~*~*~*~*~

A/N: Should I make part 2???? Idk T^T Hope you enjoyed <3

PART 2 IS OUT

@aroseinvelaris

If you wanna be tagged: Just ask and remember to specify if you wanna be tagged in just part 2 of this fic, all Azriel fics, any specific character fics/series, or just all my fics in certain fandoms. <3

[aldbooks]

This little Gwynriel Drabble was inspired by a mini bonus scene Tate James shared today from her Madison Kate series… enjoy 😁

Gwyn wandered through the House looking for her friend who was supposed to meet her for tea. Now that Nesta and Cassian were mated, it wasn't unusual for one or both of them to forget they had a previous engagement as they got caught up in one another and, as a result, Gwyn had learned to tread carefully when searching for them lest she stumble on them in a... compromising position. Again.

After checking Nesta's bedroom, the library and dining room, she headed towards the living area that faced the large balcony. At first glance, she didn't see anyone and opened her mouth to call out her friend's name, hoping she might be heard; when a small swarm of shadows appeared before her face, halting her.

They swirled and vibrated in front of her as if urging quiet. When she took a few more steps into the room, she understood why. Azriel was draped face down across the couch, his cheek half smushed into a pillow, and massive wings draped across the back and trailing to the floor. He was fast asleep, still fully dressed in leathers and clearly exhausted. As though he'd flown straight through the open balcony doors and only had enough energy to make the few steps to the couch before passing out.

She smiled as she stood over him, observing that his face was far more relaxed in sleep than she ever saw it. He looked almost boyish with his lips pursed open and dark hair draping across his eyes. How had she never noticed his lashes were so long?

Just then, the part of her mind prone to mischief delivered a delightful idea... But she would need his shadows' cooperation. "Are you going to wake him up and tell him I'm here?" she asked of them. They paused for a moment as though trying to read her intentions and then slowly shook side to side. She took this to mean no.

Smiling, she glanced up towards the ceiling but a soft thunk on the table beside her told her the House had anticipated her request. She grinned in thanks before taking the bowl and kneeling down. Carefully, she scooped out a generous dollop of the fluffy whipped cream into the curled fingers of the Shadowsinger's hand which dangled off the cushion. Her eyes darted repeatedly towards his face, watching carefully for any sign of his waking, wondering just how light of a sleeper the Spymaster was. But he must have been truly exhausted for he didn't so much as flinch at the cold goop on his fingers.

Gwyn backed out of reach of his wings as quickly as possible, noticing Cassian approaching the balcony with Nesta cradled in his arms. They must have been out flying and forgotten the time. Frantically she waved her arms at them gesturing for them to keep silent as they landed. Both gave her perplexed looks before noticing Azriel asleep on the couch.

Nesta grinned, "Aw, look at him," she whispered. "He almost looks innocent." Cassian grinned as well before noticing the bowl in her hands. His eyes darted from her to Azriel, quickly catching on and his grin widened.

"Did you do it?"

Gwyn nodded. "I was just about to wake him up and didn't want you two to spoil it."

Cass snickered, creeping closer to his sleeping friend. "It's so rare anyone pulls one over on Az. He's too sneaky by half. You do realize that once he knows it was you, he'll be sure to pay you back... ten fold."

Gwyn's smirk, she knew, was just a touch evil. "He's welcome to try."

They all inched their way closer on silent tiptoes and Gwyn grabbed the second object the House had provided. A feather. Azriel's shadows swirled around him in giddy patterns and she held it out to them. "Would you like to do the honors?"

One of the shadows darted out, snaking around her fingers as it plucked the feather from her and held it over Azriel's nose. Dancing back out of his reach once more, she watched as the feather tickled Azriel's nose and cheek, the former scrunching adorably. But still he did not wake. She nodded at his shadows to try again.

This time, the little shadow got bolder, practically shoving the feather up the poor Spymaster's nose. Azriel woke with a start, a sound escaping him that was half shout, half snort as his cream filled hands smacked against his face smearing his golden brown skin with white.

There was a pause where the whole room seemed to freeze.

"Oh my Gods, that was so much better than I planned," Gwyn wheezed before she and her companions dissolved into laughter. The shadow that had been holding the feather quickly disappeared behind the couch, many of the others joining as Azriel wiped his face with the handkerchief one of his other shadows helpfully provided, and looked down at the offending mess. Slowly his eyes raised up to his audience who fell abruptly silent. His gaze was sharp and lethal as it zeroed in on Gwyn and narrowed.

Her heart hammered in her chest as she watched his gaze flick towards the abandoned bowl of cream she'd left on the table near him when she'd grabbed the feather. A wicked smile curled his lips as his gaze returned to her, one word leaving his lips on a deadly whisper. "Run."

---

Cassian almost fell over laughing as he watched the young priestess scramble out of the room, Azriel following her unhurriedly as he took the bowl of cream and stalked out of the room, his shadows engulfing him.

Nesta shushed him and they both listened carefully for a moment. About thirty seconds later they heard a startled yelp and a wet splatter quickly followed by a deep chuckle.

[lurkinggirlie]

Azriel's mother

A theory about Azriel's mother. aka I'm reaching (not sure if there are similar posts, but do let me know if there are ! I'd love to read them)

Disclaimer: this isn't a ship related post, but both Gwyn and Elain would be mentioned for different reasons. This isn't a Freud wet fantasy post so let's not go there. (Spoilers for the whole series and HOFAS bonus)

For someone we’ve never met, I have a lot of thoughts about Azriel’s mother as a character. We don’t know much about her but here are my best guesses from what we’ve glimpsed.

We first learn of Azriel’s mother straight after we meet him, we know his mom was probably assaulted by an Illyrian lord who was married to an evil female and had two older children.  (not sure if it was mentioned but she was probably really young and worked for Azriel's father)

What we know from ACOMAF:

Rhys’ mom knew Az’s mother which is why she took him in.

Azriel stayed in his father’s keep for 11 years, and was allowed to see his mother for an hour once a week. 

I’m not sure if there are any other mentions of her, but these are the instances I found.

*************************

Then later on in ACOFAS we get a little hint that she’s still alive: 

“When do you head out for Rosehall?”

“The morning after Solstice,” he supplied, turning toward the glittering sprawl of Velaris. He winced—slightly. “I still need to do some shopping before I go.”

I offered my brother a crooked smile. “Buy her something from me, will you? And put it on my account this time.”

I knew Az wouldn’t, but he nodded all the same.”

It's not mentioned who “her” is neither where Rosehall is, but we could guess it’s someone he needs to buy a gift for. “Put it on my account this time” shows us that this isn’t the first time Rhys had asked Azriel to buy her something from him, but why is it that she isn’t invited over? Or why isn’t Rhys offering to visit her? I’ll talk about this later.

We get another mention of his mother in ACOFAS when he stops everyone from eating until Elain is seated.

*********************

ACOSF just confirms the suspicious about her being alive through Cassian’s POV

“His mother had needed a place like this. But Rhys had established it long after she’d left this world. He wondered if Azriel’s mother had ever considered coming here, or if he’d ever pushed her to” 

So, we know that Azriel's mother is still suffering from all the things she’s been through if she needs a safe haven like the library. 

Which brings me back to the point of “why isn’t she around the IC at all” 

Finally HOFAS’s bonus chapter (the Azriel/Bryce and Nesta chapter) 

Bryce jerked her chin toward Azriel. "You've got the broody look of someone with an awful mother, too. Care to share?"

Nesta snorted. "Az never talks about his mother, and neither will our friends, so I’m guessing she's even worse."

The Illyrian snarled softly, "My mother is anything but awful."

Nesta tensed, like she was surprised she'd gotten such a response from him. "I was joking. Az, I didn't even know-"

"I don't want to discuss this," Azriel cut her off coldly.

Azriel's mother is a sensitive topic confirmed. No one talks about his mom, he doesn't talk about his mom. Granted, Bryce is a stranger so of course he isn’t about to overshare but still makes me wonder. Especially since Nesta said that neither Azriel or their friends bring her up.

Now here are all my thoughts in regards to the things we have mentioned.

Reason 1 of why Azriel is keeping his mother away:

Perhaps Azriel is keeping his mother away from the IC, or more specifically his work environment because he doesn’t want her to see him this way, as in his job and the things he has to do, especially since in his bonus he mentions this:

He avoided the urge to cross his arms, not wanting to look intimidating. He blocked out the memory that flashed of his mother cringing before his father, the male standing with crossed arms in such a way that made his displeasure known before he opened his hateful mouth.

He was in the library in this scene, talking to Clotho when he was giving the necklace to her.

I'm not saying that Azriel is like his father, but a big part of his job or overall persona is to look and be intimidating. And that could make his mother feel uneasy around him. Maybe Rosehall (wherever that is or whatever it is) is the safe space he has to see his mother; where he doesn't need to be the intimidating Spy/torturer/Shadowsinger.

And maybe the reason he gravitated towards the library, or found himself there not because of some magic singing abilities but because he subconsciously, or consciously thinks that his mother would fit there. Maybe she does end up going there in the next book.

We have seen how Gwyn have suffered, and how Azriel seemed so proud to see her regain her confidence/strength. but then we saw how the rite had triggered her again to go back to the library. So Perhaps Azriel's mother mental state is even more fragile which gets me to my second point:

Reason 2 of why Azriel is keeping his mother away:

Maybe his mother is not sane.

Hear me out, what if what had happened to his mother broke her in a way where being around people just triggers her. And Azriel just doesn't want anyone to see her this way because it breaks his heart.

Reason 3 of why Azriel is keeping his mother away:

I think there could be a possibility that his mother is a Seer but wasn't able to manage her powers properly maybe that on top of everything has driven her mad (or if we aren't going down that she isn't sane theory maybe he just doesn't want anyone using her. Maybe she blurts out her visions and we know that Seers are probably precious so of course someone would want to use that power and he simply doesn't want to put his mom through that). Remember in ACOWAR how he figured out that Elain was a seer? that he was the only one who listened and how he had looked at her and then disappeared. What if he had gone to where his mom is, to talk to her about this, to confirm. Maybe she helps Elain manage her visions

That is all, has anyone thought of Azriel's mother before? What are everyone's thoughts on this?

[lorcandidlucienwill]

 “Have any of them told you, their respected High Lady, that the babe in your womb will kill you?” -Nesta Archeron

So, what if this was the moment Nesta decided to destroy the Inner Circle? Part 1

Nesta stormed away from Amren’s house. She had no regrets for what she had said or done. Her only regret had been hurting Feyre’s feelings. But her sister deserved to know the truth. Even if it was in the harsh manner Nesta had delivered it. The cold rage was still riding her, dulling her other emotions. It was decided: she was going to destroy the Inner Circle, with Cassian at her side. Her little sister had kept them alive for years. The least she could do was save her from that awful man who claimed to be her husband and his horrible court. She wouldn’t let him ruin her life. He was a master manipulator, the bastard. She had met Tamlin, who had seemed more pathetic than anything. But Rhysand…he was the real villain. Nesta had no idea if Rhysand was using his daemati powers on Feyre or if he had manipulated her thoroughly that he needed no mind-manipulating powers to control her. She stormed through the small side streets of Velaris. She sensed, rather than saw, a large, winged figure swooping down on her. She said nothing but did not protest when Cassian took her in his arms. Her rage instantly subsided.

“Cassian,” Nesta murmured into his chest when they were up in the sky. “You know this is wrong. We can’t let my sister be with Rhysand. We can’t let him rule any longer. Help me free my sister. Rid this court of his evil.”

Cassian said nothing, only continued to fly. Nesta sniffed the emotions rolling off of him and was stunned. She had expected fear and sympathy on her behalf. And indeed, there was a whiff of fear there, but it was mostly something red-hot, like…

Anger. But at whom? Amren? Rhysand?

“It’s alright, Cassian,” Nesta murmured. “I’m here, I’m ok. I’m safe with you.”

He still said nothing. Unnerved, Nesta enquired, “Cassian? Are you alright?”

Still nothing.

“Cassian, you’re scaring me. Please say something.”

“How could you,” Cassian said, deadly soft. Nesta stilled.

“How could I what? Feyre deserved to know about her pregnancy, did she not? Just like I deserved to know about weapons I had made.”

He shook his head, seething. “You told her to hurt her.”

“And I regret that, but the truth hurts sometimes. Rhysand was wrong to keep it from her!”

Cassian didn’t reply.

“You agree with me, right? Cassian?”

Finally, they landed. “Cassian. I don’t understand why you’re so angry at me.”

“You would turn on my High Lord?” Cassian asked in that quiet voice again. The hairs on Nesta’s arms stood up. “I won’t let my sister suffer at his hands,” Nesta snarled. “Surely you can see how horrible he is, Cassian. Come on. Together, we can destroy him.”

A pause. Then a sigh, pained. “Nes,” he murmured, “why couldn’t you just obey?”

“What do you mean?” Then, swift as lightning, Cassian grabbed her. Nesta screamed and thrashed, but Cassian held her in a vise-like grip. Nesta reached for her power, but it had retreated to its silvery depths. She had no magical training, no way to summon that power. And suddenly, Nesta was wondering if that was on purpose.

“Cassian, you’re hurting me!” Nesta cried. She managed to elbow him and tried to slip away, but Cassian tackled her. Nesta was screaming, sobbing, she lost track of everyone and everything as Cassian pressed his thumb to her pulse. “I trusted you,” Nesta whispered, heart breaking. Then she blacked out. When she woke up, her head was throbbing, her throat was dry, her body aching. Nesta shifted, trying to sit up, and found her body resisting. Frustrated, she shoved again. Again. And then, with no small amount of horror, she strained her head to look down at herself. She was in the House of Wind, in her bedroom. Shackles adorned her wrists and ankles. She was chained to her bed. No no no no no no no no. Nesta let out an ungodly scream. She was trapped again. She was drowning. She was in that Cauldron again, trapped with no way out. She was under the lake again with the kelpie, no way out. She couldn’t breathe. Breathe breathe breathe. She desperately tried to still her mind. But the thoughts raced, rapid as a rushing river. Trapped trapped trapped trapped. Cassian had done this. To her. She had trusted him, and he had taken advantage of that. He had chosen Rhysand.

She prayed to gods that would not listen to free her from her cage. She writhed, trying to pull the chains off their hinges. Then suddenly, she got an idea. “House,” she whispered, “give me the keys to the chains.”

To her delight, the House dropped a key onto her lap. The House, who had always supported her. Had become her friend in these weeks. Nesta strained her neck, bending over to reach the keys on her lap, but it was just too far off. Cauldron save her-

“Nesta!”

Nesta let out a sob as Elain rushed into her room. She had a set of keys of her own in her hands. She rushed over to the manacles and began to unlock them. “Hurry, the others will be back soon,” Elain said. Elain, her soft and sweet sister. The sister Nesta had spent her whole life protecting, but now barely spoke to. She had come for her, to save her. And Nesta realized that Elain wasn’t the loyal dog that she had thought she was. Elain had acted complacent, but there was a sharp mind working under her gentle demeanor. She was stronger than anyone gave her credit for. Including Nesta. “They didn’t tell me about you,” Elain whispered as they snuck out of the house. “I saw you, though. In my mind.”

She had had a vision about the Inner Circle locking her up. So, she still retained her powers. Nesta’s head pounded insistently, getting worse with each step.

“Oh, I nearly forgot,” Elain said. She pulled out a syringe and plunged it into Nesta’s vein. “Ouch! What was that for?” Nesta rubbed the ache in her arm. Elain put a bandage over the mark.

“The headache is from faebane. They injected it in you so you couldn’t use your powers to get out. This is the antidote. I snuck it from the kitchens.”

Nesta stared at her sister in horror. The Inner Circle had done unspeakable things, but to chain her to her bed, to inject her with faebane… What kind of horrors had Feyre endured at their hands? “We have to save Feyre,” Elain said, as if she had read Nesta’s mind. “From all of them.”

“What of Az, Elain?” Nesta whispered. Elain’s mouth tightened ever so slightly. “He is nothing to me. Not anymore.” Nesta sensed there was a story there, but decided to save it for another time, when they weren’t running for their lives.

At least, they reached the 10,000 steps that would lead them to Velaris. Nesta shook her head. “It’s hopeless,” Nesta whispered. “We’ll never make it.” “We will,” Elain said fiercely. There was a steel in her voice that Nesta had never heard before. Determination. And together, they began the descent.

[whitedemon-ladydeath]

listen Nesta and Elain being made into the 'evil stepsisters' irritates me. it IRRITATES me. AND YOU KNOW WHY? she took away the core foundations of what makes Cinderellas story so awful

Being made into blood related sisters + mother

one of the key reasons that makes Anastasia and Drusilla as 'awful' as they are is bec they do not view Cinderella as a part of their family. She is a step child, she's easily singled out and othered and used as a scape goat and a target

Cinderella being with two step sisters + their mother is important as it completely leaves her isolated with these people who do not actually consider Cinderella their family

child abuse + neglect in households with step children / step parents is often drastically higher statistically. there's a HUGE power imbalance in Cinderellas family. she has no one left bec her (biological) dad died and now she's left with these outsiders who use her as a slave and a target

the father living + the mother dying

Lady Tremaine (who their mother was obviously based on) was a cruel and capricious woman. She encouraged poor treatment of Cinderella and used her as a slave instead of having servants

Feyres father being sad and sympathetic does not actively put the rift between the girls (aside from his neglect of Nesta as a child). he's a passive character that is made useless and is used as a tool of resentment

the poverty

one of the things that was so important to Cinderella is that she was made into a servant for her step mother and sisters, made to clean a GIANT house all by herself. they had the wealth to have plenty of servants if they so wished but instead they had Cinderella do it

SJM removed the cruelty of forced labor by now having them being poor and starving. it is hunt or die. there is no No Choice in the matter. Lady Tremaine *chooses* to do this to Cinderella

---

Cinderella was othered, she was isolated and forced to serve her family- a family that didn't even view her as family bec she was a step child. Feyre isn't a step child, she's just the youngest that was neglected while the other two were forced into Society

she's dehumanized and ostracized bec she's not their 'real' family and now has to earn her keep. it is a price she has to pay to earn her worth and her roof over her head

SJM took away all the core Cinderella traits, lessons, and inspiration, including Cinderellas ever lasting hope and kindness 😭

[shi-daisy]

Tamlins character assassination genuinely bothered me, to have his character turn abusive isnt inherently bad but having him get constantly shat on while ryhsand continues to be genuinely vile and horrid to feryre, tamlin just seems more sympathetic the more i pick apart why feyre and rhys suck ASS. sjm does not get to sit there and act like Nesta was evil and awful as she got constantly belittled and shat on for her COPING Mechanisms and that Nesta is the one who has to apologize to the inner circle despite the way ALL of them treated her and expect me not to think she just failed with tamlin as well, she keeps writing characters she wants me to think are bad while not acknowledging that the characters she loves ARE VERY BAD IF NOT MUCH WORSE.

Anon are we lost twins by any chance? Lol kidding, but you've just voiced the exact reason why Feysand (and by extension sjm who wrote them) piss me the fuck off!

Tamlin's story reads like a damn tragedy. Abusive father and brothers, a mom who loved him but couldn't do anything to protect him, he's resigned to not get the court and tried to go unoticed to stay safe then once he finally makes a new friend his family ruin that friend's life, he loses his mother due to the family fued, is forced to be the ruler of a nation when he has no idea how and still pulls through. Then gets hounded by Amrantha and cursed. Has to lose another friend to break the curse. Finally finds true love and even after attempting to protect her she nearly dies. He had to rebuild the court and support his fiance while still suffering from ptsd himself and so he fucks up royally, said fuck up costs him his relationship, his bestie and his court and now he has nothing.

And I'm supposed to cheer for this? I'm supposed to accept this as a fitting end to my favorite character? Nope, not gonna happen. Not when Rhysand can commit multiple war crimes and treat people like shit and Feyre can ruin a court and half of another cuz she mad at Tamlin and wanted to girlboss. (Girl stop acting like an edgy 13 year old, people are dead and you have the intelligence of cabbage head.)

Oh and yes the way they treated Nesta was worse than anything Tamlin ever did yet we're supposed to think they healed her? Tamlin locked Feyre up cuz he was irrationally afraid of her getting hurt. They looked Nesta up cuz she spent 0.000001% of their wealth and calls Rhysand an ass to his face. Guess who I'm gonna side with?!

Sarah is too into Rhysand and so anyhting he and Feyre do is justified but anyone else can go choke. It's the reason I dropped the books after ACOFAS (Tamlin's scene there had me crying and I had to yeet the book away)

Tamlin needs a redemption, but written by anyone other than SJM. She will ruin him like she did Nesta.

[icey--stars]

Stories To Be Told: PART 26

Series Index

A shadowsinger, a warrior, an Illyrian, that's what she was. Trained by one of the most formidable female warriors. Escaped the Illyrian camps and her clipping when she was barely sixteen and is now the holder of 6 siphons. What happens when she tries to sneak into the City of Starlight? And starts down a whole new road of chaos?

a/n: i was blushing so hard writing this. HELP. WHY IS AZRIEL TURNING INTO A BRAT TAMER IN THIS FIC?! HELP. I’M NOT IN CONTROL MY CHARACTERS ANYMORE WARNING: suggestive teasing

↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣

I stretched out my wings behind me, yawning and wincing from the headache that spiked momentarily. Yet, I still would never back down from the training. Sickness, hangover, stabbed. It didn’t matter, unless some healer was forcing me to obey the rules.

“Doing alright?” Nesta asked from beside me.

I nodded, shaking my head on the last few seconds of my yawn. “Not dead yet. I got the worst hangover though,” I chuckled, smiling.

“Good,” Nesta stated. “I was a bit worried.”

“Nesta? Worried? Who’s she?” I joked, playfully punching her arm. She scowled and then launched herself at me, tackling me to the ground since I hadn’t planted my feet.

She growled, working to pin my hands. “You’ll pay for that,” she said, but I could see the smile on her face.

I laughed as she struggled to pin my arms, which I kept constantly moving and on occasion, pushing up at her. Finally, she sighed and just sat down on me. I laughed, thrusting my hips off the ground to try and get her off. I rolled us, wings hanging on either side as I pinned her to the ground. “There, I win,” I said triumphantly.

“You did not,” Nesta growled playfully, yanking at her wrists as she tried to free herself. “I won. Clearly. You’re the one who’s hungover.”

“I’m on top, Nesta. That means I win,” I chuckled.

She finally slumped to the ground. “Fine, I give in.”

I grinned wickedly and then got up after a few moments. Azriel smirked at me as I turned to look for him. He padded over, walking slower than usual. His wings flicked as he stopped in front of me, still towering over me. Tall males, I cursed.

“I’ll have you know angel, being on top doesn’t mean you’re in charge,” He said. He must’ve been making his voice intentionally deep and rough, because holy fuck. I was not ready for this level of teasing right now.

“You’ll have to prove that elsewhere, spymaster,” I attempted to tease back.

Azriel smirked. “Come train with me today,” he suggested. “Nesta can survive a day without you.”

“I can survive because I’m not getting in the middle of your eyefucking!” Nesta yelled. I snorted. She muttered something that sounded suspiciously like “Gods, they’re worse than Cass and I.” We likely were not. Maybe.

“Guess that settles that,” I chuckled. “What are we training for today?”

“I’d say…” Azriel hummed thoughtfully. “Balance and then sparring.”

“Fun,” I chuckled. “I’m doing extreme balancing.”

“What counts as extreme balancing?” Azriel asked curiously, turning so that he was beside me and we could walk side by side (his wings brushing against mine again) toward the gathering priestesses.

“Bringing my wings into the picture,” I chuckled. “And two poles.”

He rolled his eyes. “Don’t show off too bad.”

“Awww,” I whined. “But I want to!”

“These poor priestesses will never know peace,” Azriel joked, shoving me playfully. I scoffed, and poked him in the distinct location I knew was a ticklish spot. He snorted out a bit of laughter, grabbing my wrist firmly to stop me from continuing. “You can attempt a tickle surprise later angel. I have a reputation to uphold.”

“Aw, the big bad spymaster can’t laugh?” I teased, straining against his grip to poke at him again.

He scoffed, smiling, easily holding me back. “I can, but it’s meant to be an evil laugh.”

“Evil laugh?” I exclaimed, pulling my hand back to try and give him the illusion of peace. “Show me it.”

He rolled his eyes, and then took a breath and then began a bit of slow chuckling. It did sound intimidating, I had to admit. But it was my job to ruin his reputation. So when he let me go, I immediately darted forward again with my hand, and began tickling him. His ‘evil laugh’ quickly dissolved into wheezing as he curled over himself, grabbing both my wrists again. 

“Stop that,” he chastised. “Or I just might decide to punish you like that man did in that wonderful book you read.”

I rolled my eyes. Internally, however, I was screaming. This male was so hot. Too hot to sit here idly before training started.

Azriel’s face tightened into a triumphant smirk, knowing he’d won this round. So far, I added silently. Azriel started training after a moment, and I eagerly tried to tease him, but turning some particular way, or stretching in some way that showed off a favorable part of my body, but the spymaster just couldn’t be beaten. He refused to show any emotion, even when I saw his eyes linger. It was just ever so slightly frustrating.

Training concluded with a series of spars. I beat the two priestesses I was set against. A tag team, Azriel had said, because I was so good. I had merely smirked and twirled and danced on my feet for a while, to give the females some practice with an enemy who knew how to move on their feet, and then I won by some swift, unhanding tricks. Azriel had rolled his eyes when I wiped my brow free of sweat and smirked in his direction.

“Stop being so cocky Y/N,” he told me.

“I could beat you if I wanted, spymaster,” I said, adding a teasing light tone to his title. I smirked when I saw him narrow his eyes.

So we sparred, blades flashing and feet alight with action. I’d heard gasps from the females when Azriel or I performed some intense move, like a full turn slash that the other had to parry, or some kick paired with the sly trick of wind pushing against our wings. I ended up pinning my mate to the ground, smirking as he gazed up at me, my sword to his neck. I took a small whiff of the air, smirk widening when I smelled just the hint of his arousal.

In the end, however, he’d still won the day for teasing, especially when he’d pulled me in for a brief kiss in front of Nesta. It left me breathless and only being able to blankly stare at my sister who was breaking down in cackles.

“Cat got your tongue Y/N?” Nesta teased, lightly punching my shoulder.

I licked my lips, watching as Azriel walked off to put away the training equipment we’d used. “Shut up Nes,” I growled, breaking away from the sight of Azriel leaning over to pick up wooden poles.

Nesta scoffed. Gwyn and Emerie came over, with equally as wide smirks placed on their faces. “What was that kiss Y/N?” Gwyn asked, bumping me with her arm. “Something you wanna tell us?”

Nesta chuckled, grinning, looking at me.

I sighed, looking up. “Cauldron boil me,” I swore. “Azriel is my mate.”

Emerie gasped and Gwyn’s jaw dropped open, very similarly to how Nesta’s had when I told her. Emerie looked at Nesta and exclaimed, “You know!?”

“Y/N told me a bit ago,” Nesta explained.

Gwyn closed her mouth, as if just realizing it was open, locking her lips a moment before looking up at me. “That, I was not expecting. Have you accepted it yet?”

“Not yet,” I answered.

Emerie chuckled, grinning. “Oh, Y/N, you are in for it.”

“Shut up,” I growled, shoving her playfully.

“This explains so much!” Gwyn exclaimed. “Well- some of it. Congratulations sister.”

I grinned, blushing slightly. “Thanks.”

“What are you ladies talking about?” My mate’s deep voice startled me as he came up to stand beside me. One of his hands curled around my waist.

Gwyn burst out in laughter, and Emerie looked close to doing the same thing. Nesta merely raised a brow at Az. “Treat her right Azriel. I will stab you if you don’t,” she said.

Azriel’s brow raised. “Ah, that conversation.”

Emerie took a deep breath, and just as Gwyn stood up straight again, Emerie also decided to threaten my mate, “Don’t hurt her.” Gwyn nodded in immediate agreement.

Cassian came walking over. He shot a concerned look at me when he saw Nesta glaring at Azriel. I snorted at his concern. Azriel turned toward me. “What’s so funny angel?”

“Cass looks so concerned,” I chuckled.

Cassian righted his face immediately. “Well, Nes looks like she wants to kill Az, so I am just a tad concerned.”

“If Azriel hurts Y/N, you’re joining us for a murder,” Nesta told her mate. “You have no choice in this matter.”

Cassian sputtered, then chuckled, grinning. “I think Az will treat Y/N just as she deserves.”

“I will,” Azriel promised. “Don’t I?” He looked at me.

I blushed, grinning and lowering my gaze. “Shut up,” I scolded my mate. “They don’t wanna hear that.”

“I do!” Gwyn exclaimed. “I need proof. Now tell me.”

I rolled my eyes at my sister’s antics. “Az takes care of me perfectly, just like I do in return. Now stop being a nosy sister,” I scolded playfully.

I felt an elated feeling across the bond. Was he glad that I liked how he cared for me? Must be, I concluded.

“Fineeeee…” Gwyn hummed. “Now come on, I’m hungry.”

-----

Lunch came and went, and I settled with my sisters for a quick Mind Stilling session, before I prepared to go to work.

“No,” Azriel stated. “You’re not working at the docks anymore.”

I raised a brow. “Why not?”

“Because I’m not letting my mate work in such horrid conditions.”

“It’s not that bad,” I protested. “Plus, I kind of don’t want to be completely dependent on you Az.”

He sighed. “You get thrown into the cold water, or spat at by random High Fae.”

“Well, I kind of suck at other jobs,” I reasoned. “I can barely bake, and I can’t paint or draw very well. I’m good at physical labor.”

“Work for me then,” Azirel burst out after a moment of silence.

I lifted a brow. “What, as a spy?”

He nodded. “Rhys would pay you, and you could probably be my equal in most senses. You’re a shadowsinger too. Having that sort of power is extremely useful for the job. Plus, you get to use the training we do.”

Honestly, that sounded amazing. I wouldn’t have to deal with the docks again, I’d work under the High Lord, and Azriel and I would get to work together. It sounded amazing.

“Have you spoken with Rhys yet?” I asked.

“He wanted me to offer you the job as soon as he found out you could be trusted and a shadowsinger,” Azriel admitted.

I sighed. “Fine, I'll quit today then.”

Azriel grinned. “Good.”

“Isn’t being a spy more deadly than a dock worker though?” I asked.

“Not nowadays,” he replied. “The spying I do is mostly just the Autumn Court and Spring Court.”

“Fine,” I conceded. “As long as you actually send me on missions, and not little baby ones which I know you want to, because you want to protect me.”

“You know me too well,” Azriel noted. “Fine. But I’m coming with you.”

“Alright boss,” I teased. “Or should I say master because you’re the spymaster?”

His cheeks lit up. “I think Azriel works just fine,” He said after a moment. I smirked.

“Alright Azriel,” I added a teasing tint to my voice.

He grinned. “Alright Y/N,” he mimicked my tone. “First mission, quit the dock job.”

I scoffed, grinning. “Then what?”

“Come with me to visit Rhys.”

“Yes master.”

I skirted around him with a smirk, launching into the air as I glided down across Velaris. My old boss was sad to see me go, complaining about how my wings were so useful, but I merely rolled my eyes and left, seeing my mate flying above Velaris when I flew back up into the air.

He turned toward the River House, and I followed him.

“So,” Rhys hummed. “It appears to me that some things have occurred.” We were laying around on the couches in the living area, with Rhys on one alone, while Azriel and I sat right next to each other. I was still desperately trying to ignore his wings touching mine. Again.

“You could say that,” Azriel chuckled. “Would you like to tell him angel?”

I rolled my eyes. “Azriel is my mate and also I’m a super deadly spy now.”

Rhys choked on his sip of whatever he was drinking. Most likely alcohol, to be honest. It looked to be that color, but was also just a bit too dark to be some type of whiskey. Perhaps wine? But was he really that lazy to not grab a proper glass? “So it snapped finally?” Rhys said after he gathered himself.

“Mother above, yes,” I groaned. “The fact you kept that a secret so well angers me.”

Rhys chuckled. “I had to be good at secret keeping. Comes with the job description. Yours too.”

“I am amazing at secret keeping, thank you very much,” I joked.

“So who, praytell, am I allowed to tell?” Rhys asked, directing the question towards us both.

Azriel hummed. “How about if it comes up, you can tell them, but otherwise, keep it out of your mouth?”

I nodded in agreement. “Don’t tell Mor,” I said quickly. “I wanna see her eyes pop out of her skull.”

Rhys scoffed, smiling. “Very well then. Have you two accepted it yet? I can’t smell the bond too well.”

Azriel responded, thankfully. “No, we haven’t yet, Rhys. Don’t be nosy.”

Rhys rolled his eyes. “Oh yes, as if you weren’t any worse.”

“I will have you know I suffered when Cass and Nesta were getting it on. It’s time for payback.”

-----

I had a distinct feeling that “payback” would be soon, as I laid in Azriel’s bed, facing away from my mate as he pushed up against my back, pressing his chest in the space between my wings. I grinned from my position, hearing Azriel’s breathing slow slightly. I shifted my hips back slightly, connecting with his.

He hummed as I did it again. “What do you think you’re doing baby?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I lied innocently.

He grunted as I pushed back more insistingly. I felt something grow behind me.

“I think you know exactly what you’re doing, trying to tease me,” Azriel said, his breath brushing against my ear. “Tempt me into fucking you into the sheets.”

My breath caught and I paused my actions.

He hummed happily against my neck. “Yeah, you are trying to tempt me aren’t you sweetheart?”

I hummed, gathering my senses. “And if I was?” I pressed back again, catching the scent of his arousal, mingling with just the slightest bit of mine.

He grunted and then pressed the ankle he had between mine, up, and slid his knee between mine. He pressed that knee upward, thigh slotted between mine as he pushed up. My breath caught as it pressed at the spot between my thighs.

“So beautiful,” he groaned. “So perfect. How’d I get so lucky?”

“Turn that question right around,” I replied. “How’d I get so lucky?”

“I have a feeling neither of us are going to get an answer to that question,” he chuckled, and brushed his lips against my neck.

I pressed back against Az again, reveling in his answering groan. Then he tightened his grip on my body and pushed farther up against me. “Sleep baby.”

I whined, “but I don’t want to.”

He chuckled. “Good things come to those who wait, brat.”

My breath caught. He chuckled, breath brushing against the shell of my ear. “You can wait, surely?”

“Fucker,” I mumbled under my breath.

He scoffed. “You are a little brat. You know that?”

I huffed through my nose, frowning.

“Oh, yes you are,” he chuckled. “I see a little pout on your face.”

“Idiot,” I said a bit louder, burrowing my head further into the pillow to avoid the sensual breath against my ear.

He chuckled. “Such a brat. I’ll have fun taking you apart.”

My pout only got worse. Azriel should not be this good at this.

“Sleep brat,” he ordered.

I grumbled incoherently under my breath and then stretched out a bit, trying to ignore Azriel’s thigh placement and the way he brushed against my wings as I fell asleep.

-----

The next morning, I decided I would not be taking this. Azriel could try to win the teasing game all he wanted today, but I was determined to unravel his control.

I started with kissing him awake in the morning, luckily waking up before him. He groaned into wakefulness, burying a hand in my hair and kissing back. I grinned and pulled away as he tried to get his tongue in my mouth. He glared at me, and we silently dressed in our leathers and went to training.

“I want to lead training today,” I told him.

He lifted a brow. “What do you want to do?”

“You’ll see,” I replied, winking with a little grin. I heard his breath catch in his throat, and smirked as soon as I turned around.

For training, I decided to have them, including Azriel, working on extremely sweaty work. Azriel, halfway through, finally gave me what I wanted. Cassian normally shed his shirt during training, finding it easier to move, he’d said. However, Azriel had rarely shed his shirt. I enjoyed seeing his muscles ripple across his abdomen and arms as he ripped off his top leathers and shirt with the beginning of the mid-way break.

I smirked, easily ignoring my owne exhaustion as I prowled in his direction, running a finger down his bicep. “Hot?” I asked.

He stood up, lifting a brow. I could tell he was trying to control himself and not give into my obvious teasing, but I was determined. I moved that finger up his arm, and across his collarbone, and then down the middle of his abs until I met the beginning of his happy trail, just above his waistband.

“You’re cruel today,” he chuckled. “Making us run, lift weights and do cardio? Cruel.”

“I’d argue you’ve done worse,” I chuckled. “Stop whining spymaster.”

His chest stopped moving at the “master” bit. I smirked, and moved my hand up over his abs again. Holy fuck though, how’d he get this much muscle?

“So strong,” I said aloud, before ripping my hand away from his shiny skin.

He raised his brows. I grinned and then turned away quickly.

Through the rest of training, I got to observe those muscles. Each time he moved they seemed to ripple with power and stretch with flexibility I didn’t previously think he had. Oh, it was wonderful. But it was doing more to tease me than him. So, when I started final stretching, I made sure to place myself in front of Azriel, back facing him. When I leaned over, legs spread so I could reach for the ground, I heard a sharp intake of breath behind me. A win, for me.

When training concluded and we went over to get water, Azriel pressed his naked torso up behind me, brushing against my wings. “Teasing little angel,” he scolded. “You know you’ll be paying for this, right?”

I smirked. “Oh yes, but I’ll make you pay for your teasing first.”

“Wicked thing,” he chuckled.

During lunch, I took away the last of Azriel’s control. I moved my hand behind his chair, right beside mine, and then ran a finger down the side of his wing. He jerked in his seat. Cassian narrowed his eyes at us both before continuing his conversation. Azriel turned to lift a brow at me. I sent him a challenging look and continued to run my hand across his wings, curling my finger around the edge to press into the membrane.

His knee jerked under the table, and he curled his ankle around my foot. A silent warning. At the next tease, I felt a bit of what I believe was arousal from the other side of the bond, but there were no shifts in Azriel’s scent.

I continued to tease him like that through lunch, and walked away from lunch quickly, saying I was going to read.

Azriel must’ve used the time to gather himself, because after dinner in my little nook in just my under clothes, he found me reading, and leaned against the wall, wings towering over him. So deadly and powerful.

“You think you can get away with that teasing today angel?” He asked.

I put my bookmark into the novel, and set it down, standing and walking over to him. “I think I can do whatever I want.”

He chuckled. It sent a jolt through me. It was joyful laughter, but rather something akin to that “evil laugh” he’d done earlier. One to challenge.

“Oh angel, that little wing trick during lunch? You’ll pay for that.”

“You see,” I began. “You keep saying I’ll pay for something or another, and then you don’t do anything. I’m starting to think it’s just something you say.”

He shoved off the wall and stepped closer to me, towering over me still, forcing me to crane my neck to look at him.

“You want proof?” He asked.

I gulped down the saliva in my throat. “I wanna see what you’ll do.”

Suddenly, he pressed me backward, and lifted my chin so that his mouth slotted over mine, diving into my mouth immediately with my gasp of shock. I found myself pressed up against the wall quickly.

He pulled away briefly. “This alright?” He asked.

I breathlessly nodded.

Immediately, he dived into the kiss again, slotting a thigh up between mine again. I groaned as it pressed against my center.

He smirked into the kiss. “I’m going to make you pay for every little thing you did today,” he threatened.

I smirked. “Do it then master.”

↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣

TAGLIST (see post for getting added)

@mis-lil-red, @bunnymallowo, @judig92, @biblophilefox82, @azzydaddy, @thegirlintheshadows101, @whatupmydudes01, @feyres-fireheart, @elizarikaallen, @xenlynn, @panzees-bizarre-adventures, @starswholistenanddreamsanswered, @baebeepeach, @nyctophiliiiiaaa, @brekkershadowsinger, @officiallyunofficialperson, @bookslut420, @margssstuff, @bluephoenix908, @goldentournesol, @rebloggiest-reblogger, @inpraizeof, @ladylokilaufeyson5, @graciereads, @chanaaaannel, @towhateverend13,

When your name has strikethrough added to it, I cannot tag you. If you haven't reblogged on tumblr yet, start there? That's about all I know. But either way, Tumblr won't let me tag you. I might mention I can't ping you in a comment or something, but otherwise, I don't let you know.

[darklove9314-blog]

There’s a theory out there that Rhys is actually evil. In your reread, do you find it possible? Is there a sign you think that this could be true? I don’t personally believe he’s super evil, but since we shifted from 1st person POV of his WIFE, we saw how ruthless and contradictory Rhys can be.

And it’s not just Nesta or Cassian, it’s also Azriel and *spoiler* even CC people.

I want to reread, i’m just too lazy now lol. Will do it near ACOTAR 5 i think.

I have heard this theory and as much as it would be quite the plot twist for him to be evil all along (which I would prefer because I am a Rhys anti and it would explain some of his current actions) I doubt SJM would do that to her precious Rhys. I do however think he’s heading towards a falling arc where he won’t necessarily be a villain, but he’ll do enough awful things to where we may get sturdy consequences for his previous actions so much so that he’ll probably be the only person who can pull Tamlin out of his current state because they are mirror characters of one another. I do firmly believe his court may rebel against him not just the court of nightmares but Illyria as well, I feel like a civil war in the Night Court is where a lot of the story is headed because of the uprest in both Illyria and the CON but we’ll see where of it goes.

[wolfnesta]

Amren didn't have anything to say to that question. I mean- girl, just admit you were wrong. The ic's got nothing to back themself up here.

Amren’s character is so underdeveloped I feel like what we know we’re supposed to just go purely off vibes— she’s super mega old and she was this powerful being so therefore she can be a jerk and that’s it— but what are the qualities that make Amren Amren aside from just the bitchy blunt old lady? There is none which make her hardly a character at all. Acosf was just so painful to read because it seemed like a book that insisted on doing nothing but holding a tally mark on all the things ‘Nesta did’ but swept anything from other characters actions under the rug or even justified them. There’s a huge difference in Nesta refusing Amren’s suggestion about training then feeling betrayed (the barge argument) vs Amren calling her a waste of life and this whole scene you reminded me of where I believe she replied to Nesta saying Nesta doesn’t even know the meaning of the word friend. Are we going to hear anything about that? Maybe a punishment hike and a kneeling scene for Amren? 🙄 not to mention a huge complaint I have in this scene is that it could have been a great one on one for both of them but ofc sjm had to take the left turn and have Feyre walk in and then the whole scene was scrapped in favor of making Nesta look like the big evil and run off 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ but that’s beside the point.

Its ironic to me that Amren answered Nesta that way when she’s the one throughout acosf insisting on manipulating and using Nesta, was she even really a friend? But remember she’s old and she just became fae so we must understand where Amren is coming from. We must read between the lines and just let Amren be Amren *sarcasm*

In the end, to me, Amren is almost non existent and when she is she’s just awful. I thought we might see a little more about her background with the hofas crossover but 🤷🏻‍♀️ the most I can say is the relationship her and Nesta had during acowar was interesting but that’s where it starts and ends.

[huntquinlan]

i’ve seen speculation around the traitor/the one betraying the inner court bouncing around more recently and it’s got my gears turning:

on the one hand we have elain - seems like she’d be the “easiest” to manipulate, if we believe her desire to be human again is still on the table, or if koschei is somehow manipulating her through visions. i feel like with nyx now in the picture, nesta healing, and elain seeming to build friendships and be more social that the “human again” motivation doesn’t necessarily make sense. i’m really personally not leaning towards ‘evil’ elain. i also feel like this would be counterintuitive to her arc (you can still be soft and kind even in awful circumstances). i feel like we would more likely see her working directly against manifestations of koschei’s power (fighting decay in the spring court, restoring life to other ‘deceased areas’)

one the other hand we have azriel - i actually think this is a really interesting route. maybe koschei has been manipulating him by feeding lies to the shadows, slowly planting seeds of doubt/malcontent. we see him acting more arrogant (and irrational) in the bonus chapter, and HOFAS confirmed he’s still single (and it’s a touchy subject). i could totally see him planning to betray the IC on the DL, believing he could ‘make it right’ before they realized (and failing) - there’d be hella drama and it’d be SO juicy. ofc there’d be a HEA but it’d be so good in the moment. maybe he tells koschei where the trove is being held, trading the information for koschei to make (or ‘break’) a mating bond (obviously koschei can’t do either but azriel’s “what if the cauldron was wrong moment” is soooo hmm)

if we touch it from the Gwynriel / Little Mermaid lens, while Gwyn seems the most like Ariel, it’d be really interesting if SJM subverted it, with Azriel making some sort of deal with Koschei, and Gwyn helping free him from it in the last moment (true love’s kiss…whatever that looks like) Gwyn ofc has the “part of your world” disney element but i feel like there’s so much potential with Azriel being manipulated by Koschei, and Gwyn ending up in it as a valkyrie (w nesta and emerie) trying to recover the lost trove

otherwise, and this is purely selfish. i want the traitor to be amren bc she’s pissed about the power she lost when she helped reform the cauldron. we know she’s power hungry and morally grey…let her actually be those things!! especially since she already pretty clearly started to despise nesta after she lost her powers (jealous + she was mad nesta wasnt using her powers like she would have, lbr).

[vampyrsm]

Disclaimer I have not read acosf yet so I'm still in the "Nesta what is your deal" camp. I mean I know some of her deal is the guilt over daddy but girlie why do you even care?? The man was useless. but as an eldest daughter l'm sure I'm gonna get my shit rocked when do get around to reading

But I lowkey agree with your Tamlin take. I don't like him but he's not evil or anything.

He's a punk ass bitch but he's also severely traumatized just like literally every other character in the series

Even more lowkey... yeah Feyre annoys the hell out of me sometimes

Yeah I think ACOSF changes a lot of people's opinions on Nesta, and as an eldest daughter too I absolutely relate to the way she acts but that doesn't mean I can excuse it lmao. She was an absolute bitch to Feyre and everyone around her, there's no need to sugarcoat how awful she was

I think a lot of people forget about Tamlin's upbringing. He had it rough. His father was an awful person, and he loved Feyre in the only way he knew how. He genuinely believed he was doing everything he could to try and get back; he loved her so so much.

I just, idk, my heart genuinely broke for him when he was visited by Rhysand and Rhysand said that there were no wards up, and that it was like Tamlin was waiting for someone to come in the middle of the night and slit his throat. I think that's so sad, he genuinely does not deserve the hate he gets

I obviously don't agree with what he did and it's not an excuse for his behaviour but I can see why he did it. He genuinely breaks my heart

That goes for a lot of characters across everything. People misunderstand characters and don't look at the full picture & then there are also people who become sheep and follow the most popular booktok opinion LOL

But yes, I think the whole part of Feyre going to the Spring Court to tear it down was very immature of her. She is a very young adult sure but she just idk, the way she acted then was awful. She wasn't unaware of Tamlin's upbringing, she just didn't care

[aho-dapa]

🌤️ 🌧️ 🌩️ ☔

🌤️Share your favorite piece of dialogue from your WIP.

(The lore is deep for this Harry Potter fic, but Lucius Malfoy is basically teaching Draco about the name their ancestor was granted by the first Norman King of England, since I went down the JKR lore hole that is pureblood families)

“What did it mean to be bestowed the name Malfoy–with both English and Norman aristocrats breathing down his neck, knowing of the magic that was hidden in our ancestor’s veins? Who did he have to betray to get such a name?”

🌧️Share something angsty from your WIP.

Trans Elain in my rewrite having to deal with the Cauldron changing her body post being dunked like food in sauce

TW: body dysphoria

(Tbh this less of a snippet and more of a word vomit but here ya go):

After Luci goes shopping, he buys something for Elain, a dress that flows and puffs and nearly overwhelms her frame, only her shoulders are exposed and there is a necklace of thin lace that crosses over the protrusion of her neck. Somehow, looking in the mirror, despite the lean muscles of her arms, she feels delicate. Somehow, in this body, she feels like herself. More than she has in months.

The visage of herself in the mirror gasps and Elain falls to the floor in a heap of fabric. The tears are silent and joyous as she covers her complete expression of awe with her hands covered in black gloves.

The fabric of the tips is made to be pointed and although her hands had gained a sort of thickness to them, the gloves make her feel dainty. Soft and feminine.

She searches her face, over the tiredness and weary of it, over the harsh lines of exhaustion, and in it she sees herself.

She sobs. What surprises her even more in the bubble of laughter that rises out of her chest. She tries to stifle them both, the smile still overcoming her face.

The sudden impulse to run out of her room and hug Nesta, Feyre, anyone–claws at her heart. This is a great gift. One she did not know how to repay. Or who she could even repay.

She scrambles back to the bed where she left the note. The neat handwriting is not familiar and it left no clue to the sender's identity.

🌩️ Share something funny/cracky from your WIP.

Uhhh, this is an old one for a webtoon called Return of the Mad Demon (the joke here is that they're undercover as a couple and don't have any children):

Seongtae watches as Jaha obliterates everything in his path with a single strike. Honestly, he should stop being surprised at this point. 

"I don't know how to even begin cleaning up after this mess. Next thing you know, you'll have descended from being a demon to a fucking evil god. How the hell am I supposed to keep up, my oh-so-enlightened master?" 

Jaha merely turns around to stare unimpressed at Seongtae until a mischievous shit-eating grin breaks out across his greasy ass face. As if Jaha could achieve godhood if he really wanted to. 

"Shut up…" 

"But I haven't even said anything… Yeobo~"

"Die." 

"But who will look after the children?" 

"I will, you asshat!" 

Seongtae stomps away, nearly tripping over an unconscious body, and hisses over his shoulder, "With complete fucking custody!"

☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?

Tbh I have plans to write nearly all of the ideas that stick with me. But since I'm currently playing through Dragon Age: Inquisition (uh spoilers) and since I'm still dealing with the ending of Trespasser after romancing Solas, I wanted to write a time loop fic that was both the Inquisitor messing with time and the Fade to literally put a leash on Solas. A lot of people say that that Solavellan is unhealthy and I counter with let Lavellan be completely unhinged after finding out her boyfriend is basically a god. Anyway, the vibes are that Lavellan promises to be the Hunter of the Dread Wolf.

[nikethestatue]

Hi Nike! I love your blog and your patience while answering to all the anons. I've just finished reading hosab: finally!! It was the first time I really struggled with a Sjm book.. Basically the only thing I found interesting was the bonus chapter with Nesta and Az, I think there were some important glimpses of their lives and I just love the two of them. I would like to hear you thoughts on one sentence from Az, saying something like"You can be good but still be bad"

I think this is how he perceives himself to be, some evil person trying to do good.

Sorry for any mistakes, English is not my first language. Greetings from Italy!!

Hi!

Well, at least you finished. I couldn't even finish. It was just not my cup of tea. I think my disgust with Bryce and the direction that her character took prevented me from actually enjoying it or finishing it.

I had to ask tswaney17 to give me a condensed version of what happened :)

Kind of sad.

I am with you--I enjoyed the bonus, I sort of enjoyed the prythian part of the book, and that's about it.

I think that line indicates that all of them have done both good and bad things, and that even someone who is negatively perceived--Rhys, Nesta, Azriel himself--are capable of doing a lot of good. That grayness is a thing and acting with good intentions while maybe doing something awful at the same time are not mutually exclusive.

[separatist-apologist]

what is this about a golden rewrite i see hm?

So I'm working on a fic in that universe for feysand month. Here it the premise, so you know what we're working with.

Dad Archeron (our bad guy AGAIN) has locked his daughters in a tower. They are STARVING because whoops, turns out you need to feed your children. Elain has been charming a local fisherman for help while Feyre and Nesta have figured out how to get out through the door. They're planning to steal a boat and sail away when winter is over.

Dad comes and is like, actually Nesta, my least favorite daughter, is going to a convent because I don't trust women to rule and I don't trust Nesta to obey a husband. And Elain will marry Graysen because she does what shes told. And Feyre is like...and me? And he's like, oh my god, I forgot about you. LOL.

So theyre like, okay fuck it, we'll leave NOW. But evil eastern king of velaris rhysand followed their dad and interrupts. Someone has to stay behind and hold him off. Feyre doesn't tell Nesta and Elain she's gonna do this...she just does. And rhys is like, fuck- i need all three of them. Sends Cassian after nesta and elain on the assumption they won't get far, takes Feyre back to velaris so he won't get caught kidnapping another kings daughters

rhys is like- i'm gonna ransom her for all that land her dad stole from me and feyre is like, GOOD LUCK. and rhys is genuinely disturbed by how like...awful archeron is.

anyway in the background, Elain and Nesta get caught in a storm and are separated. Elain, predictably, washes up on Lucien Vanserra's shores and is like, please dont send me back. Feyre was kidnapped. can you help reunite us so we can run away? and Helion is like MAYBE. also dont ruin my sons engagement by being unspeakably hot. And elain is like, oh your son? that shirtless dude who rescued me? Of course I would never, say, let him chase me down on a horse to confess his undying love

and background background cassian finds nesta and is like, you know what would be like, SO HOT? if you let me help you raise an army and take your fathers throne. and nesta is like who are you? and cassian LIES and says his name is Massian, and he's just a normal dude and definitely not general of the east.

ANYWAY i have been writing the feysand part of this and i just needed to get elucien out of my system because i love them. its a lot more slow burn than before. Lucien is all like, no I must do my DUTY and elain is like LOL LAME.