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trans-cuchulainn · 3 years

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psa about book piracy

the publishing industry does not work like the film/tv industry or whatever other industries you’ve decided make piracy a victimless crime. it does actively and directly hurt authors

many authors are paid an “advance”. this is occasionally large, but more frequently is small (~£2k) and even more frequently is somewhere in the middle (~£10k). this may be the only payment they receive for what is frequently years of work. in order to earn any royalties, they need to sell enough books to “earn out” (make the publisher back the money they spent on the advance). if they don’t earn out, they will never get royalties. also, the advance for their next book will probably be smaller.

if their book is part of a series, later books in the series may be cancelled because the first book didn’t sell well enough

even if a book isn’t cancelled, the print run may be reduced (=how many copies are printed) which means the book will be in fewer bookshops which mean there are fewer opportunities for it to sell copies

all of that conspires to mean... the author’s next advance is smaller, a series gets cancelled before it’s finished, and generally you have fucked over the person whose work you were stealing

(if they have earned out already, it may not directly fuck over their future books as much, but you are directly taking royalties out of their pocket, so)

if you’ve ever been mad because the 3rd book in a trilogy you were reading never got published, it’ll be because the first two didn’t sell enough. maybe the market was wrong at the time, maybe they took a while to take off, or maybe -- and increasingly frequently -- it’s because too many people pirated them instead of buying them.

(this is also why waiting until a series is complete to buy any of them is more likely to result in the series never being complete. the publishers need to know it’s a good investment. better to buy the books and wait to read them, if you’re concerned about cliffhangers, than to refrain from buying them entirely.)

“but the book is still there after i download it so i haven’t technically stolen anything” read the above bullet points again and understand that what you have stolen is not the book per se, it’s the sale, and therefore the goodwill with the publisher that makes them buy that author’s future books and pay that author money

do not @ me about “but what if it’s the only way to access english-language books in your country” because that is not the situation i’m talking about or the majority situation in the general scheme of things. 90% of people who pirate books do so either because they don’t realise it hurts authors or they don’t give a shit

also if your justification is that authors are “rich” i would like to point out that a recent report showed average earnings for an author in the uk to be £10.5k/yr in 2018. that is substantially below minimum wage (for full-time work), so genuinely, fuck off with that

you have no idea what somebody else’s financial situation is, and i know several authors who have been told to their faces that it was okay to pirate from them because they were rich when those people were in fact struggling to make ends meet

(not to mention that authors are technically self employed which means no benefits; this is particularly challenging in countries without universal healthcare)

whatever bullshit “net worth” estimate you’ve found online or whatever bears absolutely no resemblance to most people’s financial reality

so if you think you’re being clever by only targeting authors you’ve decided are wealthy, consider that there’s a high chance you’re wrong

yes books are expensive and yes big publishing companies are the ones seeing most of the benefit of that. but it’s not the big publishing companies that get hurt when you steal them, because they just squeeze that money out of the authors instead to make up their bottom line. does it suck as a system? obviously! does that make piracy a good way to resist it? no, because it only hurts the people on the bottom

some people think that piracy doesn’t affect sales. it does. it has been demonstrated over and over again that piracy impacts sales (see maggie stiefvater’s experiment with the raven king for an example). “it’s helping people discover the books” doesn’t hold up to scrutiny. all an author gains from this is more people who will steal from them. exposure doesn’t pay the bills. exposure just kills ya.

many places have libraries. libraries benefit authors, because they buy books. in some countries, like the UK, authors receive money based on how many times their books are borrowed. libraries frequently offer ebooks, so if you’re not able to access them in-person you can still get books. libraries are good! if you can use your local library, you should. free books for you, without fucking over the creators. you can often request books that they don’t carry, which then means that other people also get to read that book.

(“my library doesn’t carry queer books” i sympathise and i realise it can be challenging to request those in a conservative area but also consider that books by marginalised authors are exactly the ones that publishers will yeet if they think they’re not making a return on their investment, so unfortunately, pirating those is extra bad. publishers will drop “risky” shit like a hot potato if it’s not making them money. those are exactly the books we need to show up for.)

obviously in an ideal world we would have UBI or whatever and therefore people’s ability to put food on the table would not be dependent on monetising creative pursuits but that’s not the world we live in. in the world we live in, writing is work and work deserves to be paid for. stealing people’s labour because you feel entitled to it is not more justifiable just because that labour is creative.

the fact that people write as a hobby does not negate the challenges of writing as a profession. the two are actually pretty different. writing as a hobby isn’t easy, but writing as a profession has a whole heap of extra behind-the-scenes work that you don’t see, in case you’re tempted to take the “but it’s not real work” argument. besides which, “but people do it for free on the internet” is a shitty reason not to pay people for their work.

if you can’t afford a particular book, that sucks, i often cannot afford a book i would like. the solution: read other books that you can afford / which your library does carry / which are out of copyright. not: steal the book because obviously you should have whatever you want whenever you want it.

don’t be a dick

stealing screws authors over

in conclusion: stop trying to justify piracy in my notes or in the replies to authors who complain about it. stop telling authors to their face that you don’t value their work and their time. it’s not cool, it’s not clever, it’s not revolutionary. it’s just fucking over people who are already underpaid and living precariously.

#also while we're here stop telling people to pirate music #spotify is shit for artists but piracy is worse #buy their music on bandcamp if you want to avoid ads and big corps #but unless they're like world-famous musicians #piracy also fucks them over #source: my brother is a musician #meanwhile source for this post: i literally work in the publishing industry #and a bunch of my friends are authors #in a bunch of different genres and age groups #so i have a reasonable grasp of what goes on behind the scenes #book piracy #books #anyway i've had this rant in my drafts for a while but i saw people being dicks about this on twitter so i guess we're posting it now

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class1akids · 3 years

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BNHA 299 - Thoughts

Well, we get Baby Keigo’s backstory, straight out of a Dickens novel, it turns out that Plushie!Endeavor was actually the most highly-functioning parental figure Hawks ever had, the Nomu!Jeanist theory is kinda confirmed - let’s go!!!!

So Hawks’ backstory is definitely in the finalist category of most miserable childhoods, as he’s born into abject poverty, to a cruel, criminal father, an alcoholic mother as an unwanted bastard child.

Look at him trying to patch up the dirty shack they live in, only to get kicked by his father, for turning his back.

It looks like his dad’s quirk is wings and his mom’s quirk are her floaty eyeballs that she can use to spy. So Keigo, this unwanted accident hit the genetic jackpot with his quirk of wings where each feather can be used and controlled individually, making him really versatile.

For now though, his wings seem to do nothing but infuriate his abusive asshole dad, whose probably worried that a winged kid could lead the authorities to him. So he’s forbidden from leaving the house, even though it seems that his feathers allow him to sense danger. Oh, wait, perfect mentor for Deku’s new quirk!!!

So his only companion is the little Endeavor plushie we saw all the way back at the pro-hero arc.

anyways, his life turns around when his dad is arrested by Endeavor and heroes become real for Hawks. And I love how in these panels it seems like the plushie really comes alive. Heroes exist. Hawks’ own doll becomes more than just a comfort object - it’s the representation of being saved and helping others.

It’s so interesting how this stands in contrast to Shigaraki’s story - for whom heroes don’t exist, because he never evidenced them in his life, or Touya’s story, who doesn’t believe in heroes because the one in his house was a literal monster.

So suck it, Stain. The moral character of the hero is not the only factor - the real impact they make in someone’s life cannot be understated.

So the cage is broken, but not fully yet, because Hawks’ mom Tomie decides to run and they end up homeless on a train station though I think they are only there for one day. Tomie sends Hawks out to steal in not quite so many words, and the life he was about to escape him threatens to swallow him whole. He really was set up for the villain path.

Still Hawks escaped his destiny when the HC offered to basically buy him from his mother (Ma’am, we’d like to put your talented kid into a secret spy/assassin training program, where we’ll train him brutally. You’ll get a house and money. OK? - OK, said Tomie).

So back in present time, Hawks wakes up and we see him driving with Best Jeanist (wow, he has a very flashy ride...) and he has the signature Todoroki face-bandages, just in case anyone doubted which plotline he belongs to. He’s also wears some kind of nuzzle, but noone can silence him as he taps away incredibly fast.

I hope this is a text-to-audio program and BJ is not text-reading and driving, because that would be a big no-no. Seriously, peeps, don’t text and drive. PSA over.

OK, so we get a stupid explanation about BJ being turned into a nomu and being kind of dead in the bag. And holy shit, 1 the hero side has nomu technology - like how and 2 that sounds like a really dumb plan. What if Dabi decided to cremate BJ instead of putting him into storage?

Anyway, villains on the rampage, Jeanist catches them with minimum effort and we get a glimpse of what’s happening in the real world: the mom’ and pop’ hero agencies are already closing down (seriously, they could not withstand like 3 days of criticism???) and at least half of the population is hating on heroes, and are ready to take things into their own prosthetic limbs.

So it turns out BJ and Hawks were driving to Hawks’ mom’s house to confirm that the Takami thief - Hawks connection was leaked by her. And it was. She even leaves a letter to say sorry and explain that Dabi sent thugs onto her and she basically folded immediately and sold out her son. What a sweet parent she is. (That’s rough, buddy.)

And it’s so heartbreaking that Hawks thinks that’s what he deserves anyway - no, baby, you don’t. And I’m not sure he’s really talking about saving here, or talking about how his idea of saving was faulty, because how can you save someone that feels like you turned your back on. Hawks broke away alone. He was forced to leave his past behind and maybe this is why Twice felt like he was talked down to.

But Hawks being a silver lining kind of guy sees an opportunity here to finally be completely free. Free of his parents. Free of the hero commission.

In a big Todoroki-like dramatic moment he takes off his nuzzle and we get a flashback.

The Origin story of Plushie!Endeavor and an acknowledgement that Tomie maybe wasn’t all bad. That even as wretched as she was, she tried to do one thing right for Hawks - by giving him an ideal to work towards.

And I love that Endeavor is so cheap he’s in the sale bin at 1/6th of the price of an All Might doll. But it’s also a social commentary on hero society, where kids in most need of a hero are priced out of getting the Symbol of Peace.

Being free to be finally both Keigo (who understands these downtrodden people because he’s one of them) and Hawks (who could soar and break away from that life), he finds the inspiration in these broken people. His mom. Endeavor. Twice. OK, let’s stop and contemplate here for a moment that Twice who created Re-Destro clone, who killed HPSC President freed Hawks from their clutches.

He remembers this purest feeling of wanting to help, of wanting to belong. And we see Hawks’ own origin. That moment he saves people in a car accident that opens the hero world to him.

First order of business is Endeavor - who was Hawks’ hero and who is in trouble now. And I’m sure everyone is going to be watching Hawks' reaction to the Dabi broadcast, because if rankings still mean anything, he’s No. 2. and heir to the throne.

But for now, it seems he wants to support Endeavor. Because being helpful is the value he wants to live by.

Also, screw the Icarus parallels, Hawks is fucking Phoenix and he’ll soar again.

And look at this literal baby and his grumpy little plushie. It was an amazing backstory and I loved every frame of it.

#bnha 299 #class1a reads bnha #hawks #takami keigo

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karliesbuzzcut · 3 years

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I know it’s not the 25th just yet but this lousy year deserves an early Christmas. So grab some coffee, wine or snacks and sit around the fireplace with me.

By now we all know that TTB is a bit angry. She doesn’t know who to be angry at, and she’s definitely not going going to be angry at herself, so she’s doing the next best thing: writing angry emails to people she doesn’t like.

Unfortunately I’m not one of those lucky recipients 🤷‍♀️ She knows that the best way to truly hurt me is to pretend I do not exist, and that is my curse. But I still managed to get my little goblin hands on one of these emails, and just call me Inez because you bet your ass I’m going to tell you all about it.

I propose a personal goal for all of us in 2021: to develop the level of self-confidence that allows you to write an email referring to yourself in the 3rd person.

I’m particularly a fan of the last line “your posts continue to be monitored”. I know she means it as a threat of sorts, but since I’m an attention whore I’d just be thrilled knowing there’s at least one person who will always read my nonsense.

At this point, I’m sure we’re all thinking the same thing: “well that’s an impressive resumé” - but ALSO “a death threat?! HOW? WHEN?”

You might even be wondering if you missed something - you always suspected that silly job of yours was distracting you from what’s really important.

Don’t you worry, TTB has receipts. So, if you’re feeling raunchy, let’s take a look at this ~unlawful behaviour~.

TTB, sweetheart, where’s the spoiler alert? I was only half a chapter away from that bit!

I’m going through an overload of thoughts, let me bring back my always helpful bullet points.

It’s quite wholesome that the “embarrassing efforts to delve into [TTB’s] personal life” turned out to be just someone saying “I heard she’s straight and married” and then making a Harry Potter reference.

It’s quite cute that TTB thinks she can threaten legal action on people who told her to “fuck off” on the internet.

You guys know I’m not the nitpicky kinda gal but... for the sake of the argument, okay? Technically Bellatrix was never mention in that ~death threat~. For all we know, going “full Molly Weasley” could mean “settling down and having 7 kids with a handsome ginger lad”, “help an unaccompanied orphan walk through a wall” or “knit very nice Christmas jumpers that her children won’t appreciate.” Molly Weasley did a lot more than killing Bellatrix. Justice for Molly, is what I’m saying.

It is now when TTB starts getting her (what I can only imagine) perfectly manicured claws out, “you’ve been a bad Jew and I’m going to report you to the Jew police”.

Guys, a little bit of a PSA here: right now TTB is feeling cornered, so she’s at her most dangerous. She’s doing her best to find ‘dirt’ on people who have criticised her, and then is using that dirt to humiliate them somehow – or maybe even get them fired? So, if you think you could be one of these people and there’s an embarrassing fanfic you wouldn’t like your postman to see, it might be a good idea to do something about it.

OOF! The last line is magnificently evil. Big fan, TTB, seriously. It reminds me of those times when nudes are leaked online and people start saying “wEll iF sHE DidN’t wANt thOsE pICtuREs tO Be SeEN shE sHOulDn’T hAVe TAkEn ThEM”... but that’s a straw man argument on my part, and I can recognise that.

However. There is something poetic about TTB calling out someone for “attempting to delve into her personal life” and then going through a lot of trouble to find out where and for whom that person works. Some people would call that hypocritical. I call it poetic because I’m a romantic.

TTB threatening someone to take them to “the proper law enforcement authorities” for “wrecking TTB’s shit” is the equivalent of me buying a cheap ‘sexy police officer’ Halloween costume, and going around telling people to compliment my hair or they’ll be taken to polyester jail.

(Spoiler alert: this email is from the 17th of this month, this person hasn’t taken down a single thing, and nothing has happened.)

I bet you thought this email couldn’t get any better. But that’s what you get when you underestimate TTB. You get Taylor Doe.

Anyway, TTB babe, I extend my hand to you once again. Would you consider taking me to the proper law enforcement authorities? I’ve been a very unlawful girl. I can be behaviourally out of control, if that’s what you’re into. If you’re having trouble getting my contact details, don’t sweat it! Have Theprologues DM me and I’ll give you my email address. I can even give you my mum’s email, maybe you’ll have better luck than me explaining to her why I spend so much time staring at my phone. You tell me whose email you need and I can even find you some drunk pictures of me and a list of people I’ve hooked up with - let’s go big, TTB, we can do this!

Sincerely,

Karlie Incognito

#taytaysbeard #kaylor

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arpiii · 4 years

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The BAU High School Teacher AU

Let’s start with teaching positions:

“Mr. Hotch” - English, History

“Mr. Rossi” - Film, Psychology

“Emily” - French, Arabic, Gym coach

“Morgan” - Woodwork, Weight room & Gym Coach

“Dr. Reid” - Math, Science, Music theory

"JJ” - Spanish, Art

“Garcia” - Drama, Computer Science/Tech classes

“Principal Strauss” - no one likes her

“Gideon” - School counselor

“Officer Elle” - School security

Now about the staff:

Mr. Hotch is the strict teacher. No late work, he doesn’t curve grades, and can tell if you bullshit your tardy. But he’s still supportive towards the students that need it and helps any way he can. He barely smiles and is never absent from class. The only jokes he cracks are really cheesy dad jokes that make the class cringe and groan and snicker because he says them so seriously. If a student is having trouble in the class but it’s because of their parents, Hotch makes sure to meet with them and lecture the parents and defend his student as much as he can. But all his students know, one day each year, he plans a prank on Mr. Rossi, his rival. This is what the class looks forward to every year. A couple times he brings his son Jack to class and the class loves him. They’re also surprised to see Hotch smiling all day and going soft when he talks to Jack. When he has something important to teach he lets Jack hang out with Garcia.

Mr. Rossi is the strict, yet chill teacher. He disciplines his kids and gives them extra credit when they deserve it. He likes to joke with the class and brag about him being a best selling author, the class roll their eyes but enjoy it. He’s also extremely sarcastic and has dry and slightly dark humor. He throws a pizza party at the end of each quarter/term and every time he goes over to Hotch’s class to offer some. Hotch always declines but Rossi leaves it on the desk anyway. The only time Hotch breaks his no emotion streak is when Rossi visits and teases him. The class is told at the beginning of the year that it’s a feud but they all know they secretly have a thing for each other and are too stubborn to admit it.

Emily is the laid back Gym teacher. She and Morgan are constantly one-upping each other and they brag to each other who’s picked up the most girls at bars to entertain the class. She’s the only teacher that know’s how to piss off Morgan and her class loves that. She also teaches French and Arabic. JJ, the Spanish teacher, visits her class and her students notice every time that JJ is the only teacher Emily is sweet with, but JJ doesn’t seem to notice.

Morgan is the cocky gym teacher and weight-room coach, and also teaches woodwork. He’s super chill but strict when he needs to be, and is constantly motivating kids. If a kid is in trouble or scared, Morgan makes sure to resolve the problem or defend the kid with his whole chest. He likes to compete against Emily’s class in sport games during class. But most of his free time he visits Dr. Reid. His main purpose is to embarrass Reid with innuendoes and flirting, which he’s always successful at. Reid’s class enjoys the shit out of it. Emily is annoyed at both of them and is the only teacher that calls Morgan Reid’s “boyfriend” just to mess with both of them. When Morgan can’t visit Reid’s class he sends Emily as a messenger who rolls her eyes every time.

Dr. Reid is that really smart teacher. He teaches up to the advanced math and science classes and also music theory. Reid tells the class to let him know if he’s talking too fast or rambling so he can slow down. He cares about all his students and although the students are annoyed with all the work they get, they enjoy having Reid as their teacher. They love the fact that he loves Dr. Who and give him Dr. Who and nerd themed gifts on his birthday. When the class is doing individual work Reid puts on classical music. The students also teach him about pop culture things like Tik Tok dances and iconic vines. Reid isn’t very social but they see his personality come out when Morgan visits. His face goes red every time Morgan drops an innuendo and threatens Morgan to leave the class. Some ways he’s done that is by throwing a white board eraser at him, threatening to splash a beaker of acid on him, and holding his guitar as a weapon. They know he’s not serious though because Reid fails to hide his smile. Garcia visits the class a lot and she’s like the mom of the class, she sometimes brings treats and likes to chat with the students. Every time she visits, she ad Reid are quietly gossiping in the corner, and although the class can’t hear them, they can tell it’s about Morgan (especially the one time they caught Reid blush during a conversation).

JJ is the Spanish and Art teacher. She is extremely sweet and checks in with her class constantly if they’re doing ok or if they need help. No one is scared to ask questions because she always answers them without making the student feel bad. Her students notice Emily visits a lot, and they can tell they have a thing for each other. Whenever they ask JJ about it, she neither confirms nor denies it so a huge conspiracy starts. She also teaches art and Garcia likes to visit a lot. The two gossip about all the other teachers, JJ fills Garcia in about Emily and Garcia fills JJ about Reid and Morgan. Sometimes, when Reid is out, JJ substitutes his music class. She likes to fool with Morgan when that happens.

Garcia is the mom of the school. Everyone loves her. She teaches drama and comp sci so she is loved by the gays and the nerds. She’s always enthusiastic and supportive and treats her kids. She’s very colorful and gives her kids candy or stickers if they get a question right or do something really cool in their assignment. When she visits Reid, if Morgan shows up she guards the door and keeps him out of the class. Morgan tries to charm her but she charms him back and doesn’t break. Once in a while she fails to keep him out and the class goes nuts watching the show. She’s also called a lot by Hotch because he needs help with technology constantly. Rossi needs help too once in a while but he just relies on his students or eventually figures it out.

Principal Strauss is only seen in the halls once in a while. She monitors classes twice a year and all the students AND the teachers behave their best that day. Even Hotch seems relieved when she leaves the class. She makes announcements at the most inconvenient times. She is also the only one who enforces the dress code on students. Once in a while she asks what Morgan’s doing in Reid’s class and Morgan tries to cover it up and the class backs him up. Rossi’s class finds it hilarious when she’s talking to the class and he’s mocking her from behind, rolling his eyes and making faces. The students clearly know the teachers don’t like Strauss as they constantly complain about her. She calls Garcia’s games and prizes “distractions” and thinks JJ gets off track too much because she checks in with her class to much. The students that hate her the most though are Reid’s students, because she’s the hardest on him for no reason. They can tell by his behavior and can tell he’s drained every time she leaves the class. They tell Morgan and Morgan decides to start a yoga club for students and teachers to destress once a week. He personally invites Reid and that’s the only time the students see Morgan doesn’t mess with Reid. Garcia also offers free hugs to any student who needs one during the school day.

Gideon is everyones favorite staff member. Everyone loves him. His door to the counselor’s office is always open and he always knows what to say to students that have trouble. He’s just very relaxing to talk to. Everyone respects him and even all of the teachers get along with him. He checks in with classes once in a while just to see how everyone’s doing, and sometimes sits in lessons to learn with the students. Sometimes he participates in group assignments. He’s also the only one who stands up to Strauss. He never get’s mad, he’s always calm and manages to talk sense into her. Because of this, she’s never mad at him. When she is, he doesn’t take it personally. He doesn’t go to the yoga classes, but makes sure student’s know about them. He starts the chess club and during the whole year it’s a competition between Gideon’s team and Reid’s team. The students keep track of the bracket thats displayed in the cafeteria and take sides, creating a large yet fun divide in the school. The students ask all the teacher’s who’s side they’re on each year and create flyers to root for each team. It’s also partially a fund raiser for the school to have extracurricular activities. The teachers give extra credit to any of their students who’s rooting for the same team they are if that team wins. Gideon also attends all of the sports games and musical performances.

Officer Elle is school security and most of the students are nice to her. She makes sure to break shit up if a fight breaks out and firmly advises kids to not drink or do drugs. She has PSA assemblies twice a year about security and health. She’s chill and likes to chat with students. She’s basically a badass and makes sure to put kids in their place who deserve it. She also teases Morgan because they have a history in working in security together.

Assemblies:

There are four assemblies every semester. Three out the eight for the entire year, Strauss forces Reid to present. She’s totally unaware that he has the worst anxiety out of all of them (and if he told her she probably couldn’t have cared less and given bullshit excuses). The students eventually catch on that Reid din’t ask to present based off his shaking hands and wavering voice. They also see the looks the other teachers are giving Strauss, who is unaware. Reid bears through it though and Morgan comforts him afterwards as Strauss is giving the closing statement. The student’s support Reid as he’s talking and try to make him feel better. Morgan makes jokes at him to distract him and the class plays along with it. Two of the other assemblies are given by Elle, two others are given by Strauss, and one is given by Gideon. However there’s one unofficial assembly held every year by the students (teachers are invited except for Strauss). At the end of the year the students compile a video of pictures or videos of funny or iconic moments of things that happened to the students or teachers throughout the school year. This usually includes crackhead moments during free time in classes, a kid secretly recording Hotch as he’s trying to tell a dad joke, Morgan flirting with Reid in front of the whole class, Reid’s students dancing in a Tik Tok with Reid (followed by someone recording them creating the Tik Tok), the hype for the end of year chess tournament, the massive pranks pulled by the teachers and students on April Fools Day, everyone’s costumes during Halloween, and so much more. One student brings a popcorn machine. Garcia brings candy.

Specific events:

Morgan crashes Reid’s class multiple times a week. The students look forward to it, because all Morgan does is flirt. He’d spit out innuendos that are somehow related to what he’s teaching. It’s the worst in music class.

“You’re doing well with that fingering” “I’M PLAYING THE GUITAR”

“Hey Dr. Reid, how’s the blowing going?” Reid’s face burns red

“You really stroke the G well-” “GET OUT”

“For a drummer you don’t bang very well” *dodges drumstick*

One time Reid threw a white board eraser at him only to receive “damn you trying to rub me out?” which causes the class to roar.

The class goes crazy every time and someone is bound to be recording every time Morgan steps into the classroom. Morgan would also call Reid “pretty boy” on occasion and ruffle his hair, which Reid would fix right after. (Everyone knows he secretly loves it).

One day Reid gets his hair cut short with curls on top, but Morgan doesn’t find out till the next day. He also wore his glasses that day (which he does wear occasionally). The class started to silently freak as they filed in before the bell rang. When Morgan entered mid class his greeting of “Hey pretty boy” was cut short when he saw him. Morgan stood frozen for a good 30 seconds before Reid approached him (WAY too close) and says lowly “What we’re you saying?” Theres no response from Morgan, the class is trying to stay silent while going ape shit, everyones phones are out, it looks like their noses are about to touch when finally Reid steps away and asks the class “So, who can tell me the answer to number 6?” and just leaves Morgan there. The class tries to recover and when five minutes pass Reid looks back at Morgan (who hasn’t moved) and asks, “Hey Morgan, don’t you have a class to teach?” Finally Morgan snaps out of it and stutters “Uh.. yeah- I gotta... go,,” and leaves the classroom.

Spirit week is a riot.

It starts with Tropical day. Everyone dressed in a hawaiian shirt and wore a fake lei, even Hotch. Garcia gives out lei’s to everyone that doesn’t have one and Rossi gives extra credit to whoever dresses up that week.

Next is 50′s/Grease themed. Morgan went all out with his outfit, leather jacket and sunglasses included. Reid did not own a leather jacket, but he did grease his hair back and wore a white t-shirt which entertained his students. Hotch, along with his outfit, brought a comb and constantly combed through his hair throughout class. Garcia and JJ wore poodle skirts and JJ wore her hair in a high ponytail. Emily wore black leather pants, a polkadot shirt, and a red bandana in her hair with bright red lipstick. Rossi just wore his helmet from the Vietnam war, and when someone called him out, his excuse was the war started in the 50′s so it counts.

Next was Lazy Wednesday, and the students (and Morgan) didn’t know how much Reid in a hoodie could affect them. It got to the point where one of the students had to call out to Morgan “You’re drooling” which followed by laughter from the class. Emily wore her snuggie and JJ and Garcia wore matching Pokemon onesies. Half of the students were distracted because Hotch was wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants.

Thursday was Disney themed. Morgan was, of course, Prince Charming. Every time he entered a classroom he overacted dramatically. Garcia decided to match by being his Cinderella and had her hand kissed by Morgan every time they passed each other. Rossi’s students had a field day with his costume. He dressed up as the toy seller from Toy Story 2. He got Woody and Jessie toys from Hotch’s son, Jack, and he was constantly eating cheese puffs. Hotch melted everyones hearts by dressing as Kristoff and bringing in Jack who was dressed as Sven. Every girl and gay almost had a heart attack from Reid, who was dressed as Milo from Atlantis. But the winners in the students book were Emily, who dressed up as Flynn Rider, and JJ, who dressed up as Rapunzel. They hung out in the halls in between classes, Emily winking at everyone who walked by.

With the good days come the bad. One year, Reid started getting these horrible migraines. He wouldn’t tell anyone, however, and kept teaching. Even Morgan asked a couple times if he was okay. This lasted almost two weeks, and then Reid had to lead an assembly that Friday. The migraines on top of his rising panic attack while he spoke to the students made him feel worse. He started to stutter and feel lightheaded, but Strauss said nothing. Morgan managed to hold on to him and finally told Garcia to take him into the hall. Thankfully Hotch stepped in and continued the assembly like he was presenting the whole time. After it was over, Morgan chewed out Strauss to the point where Emily had to hold him back. The students were confused as to what happened and theories started to spread as school let out. Morgan went straight to Reid who was sitting in a dark empty classroom with Garcia. Reid finally told him about his migraines and Morgan insisted taking him to the ER. The speculations grew when students saw Morgan leading Reid to his car with their arms around each other for support as they walked, Morgan comforting him on the way to the car.

One day, Reid had a doctors appointment for the latter half of the day, so he asked JJ to sub his music theory class. Only, Morgan didn’t know. There was a small hall that led into the big music room, so when Morgan entered, he couldn’t see JJ from where he was. He thought he was sneaking up on Reid, putting his finger to his mouth at the students who saw him sneaking. Finally he walked out to greet who he thought was Reid with “Is that something in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?” He froze when he saw JJ staring back with her arms crossed and one eyebrow raised. He saw the class was recording him and shook his head while saying “I will get you back for this.” As he walked out defeated, JJ called after him, “I’m guessing he didn’t tell you about his doctor’s appointment.” which earned a middle finger from Morgan which JJ couldn’t see from where she was standing. This definitely ended up in the end of year slideshow and it was the first time Reid saw the video. He counted that as a victory.

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corpsentry · 3 years

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cool personal psa

haha a personal public service announcement what a riot. never bothered to make my personal opinions known because it seemed like too much effort but i’ve been putting in a lot of effort recently anyway so eh. might as well

- i don’t give a shit what you ship. this is not a conditional statement, there is no ‘except’ or ‘unless’ or ‘if’. i don’t read much fic anyway and only from a handful of authors. this does nothing to me.

- i think objectivity is a farce. this extends past shipping to broader statements like ‘this characterization of zelda is objectively wrong’ or ‘this video game is objectively the best in the franchise’. i have no interest in people who think they are right about everything, push their headcanons onto others, and attack those who have different opinions. there is no such thing as a superior way to write/draw/think in fandom, because there is no unified goal in fandom to begin with.

- i believe that you are responsible for curating your own online experiences. the block and mute buttons are there for you. use them. if you see something you don’t like, it seems counterintuitive to me to continue to look at it. it also seems cruel. if you do not actively harm anyone, i think you are free to do whatever it takes to make your personal online space pleasant and tolerable.

- this blog and its blogger have a zero-tolerance policy for harassment. this is not a conditional statement. when we as a society allow for harassment to happen “if (condition)” we are saying that as long as you think it’s justified, it’s fine. do you know how many people think homophobia is justified? has anyone seen 4ch*n recently? harassment disproportionately harms marginalized groups even if you claim that you are doing it for ‘the right reasons’, because there are a thousand other people doing it for reasons that are horribly and grotesquely wrong.

- this blog and its blogger do not condone hate campaigns, targeted harassment, dogpiling, anon hate, death threats, jokes about the electric chair, doxxing, public defamation, public shaming, and any other actions designed expressly to cause harm. this is not a conditional statement. i do not care what the other party has done. i have been on the receiving end of harassment before and it will make you wish you were dead. this blog and its blogger do not condone the death penalty. i do not think anyone has the right to decide if another person dies. by extension, i do not think anyone has the right to decide if another person deserves to live. not even if you are a minor. not even if you are gay. not even if you are both.

- this blog and its blogger are tired. this blog and its blogger once tried to read lolita but got bored halfway through page three and deleted the pdf. this blog and its blogger want to believe in the fundamental good of humanity, but harassment has become the language of modern fandom and they have fuck-all clue what to do about it. they don’t like it, though. they hate it. this blog and its blogger want people to stop telling each other to die.

to close, i really, really, really don’t give a shit what you do on the internet and i don’t talk to very many people on this website, so i’m not going to make some big dramatic statement and say that if you believe in x i don’t want you on my blog. follow me. unfollow me. block me. it’s no skin off my back. but i want to be clear about what i believe in, so you can take this information and decide for yourself what you want to do with it. go do that. i’m not going anywhere.

#id always been blissfully far away from the discourse because i ship the most basic shit and dont bother people about it #until i got hit with a storm of harassment for something completely unrelated to any discourse and it occurred to me that people #dont send death threats for the good of humanity. they send death threats because they want you to feel like shit and they want you to die #so no. i don't fuck with any of this. i'm not going to address the elephant in the room because i don't think it matters #if someone commits a federal crime i do not think that gives you the right to kill them. none of us are just arbiters of morality #and the tumblr blog format is great for making long and tired lists so here is my long and tired list #most of us are from marginalized communities or multiple ones. i do not see a point in wearing each other down like this #this does nothing for the children. the children do a lot of death threatening themselves and i dont think this makes them happier #do what sparks joy for you guys #i have three hundred accounts manually blocked on twitter and about a hundred muted #people are allowed to piss you off. lord knows i'm always angry. but the moment you decide to revoke that person's right to live #you cross a line. and it is a bad line. it is a fucking bad line #gelmo #wow this is hilarious gelmo is going to be like (shitpost) (shitpost) (death threats are bad guys) (shitpost)#well that's an accurate representation of who i am so i think i will take it #you can talk to me for the record but if you want to call me an abuse supporter i will block you though the tumblr block button is useless #good faith conversations. has anyone heard of them recently? now you have #i'll be around. im still rendering grass. see you when i see you

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tinyhoovequius · 3 years

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Bonkers Bananaville

Quick PSA edit:

Actively and intentionally harming another person because they inadvertently hurt you is the behavior of a narcissist. If you find yourself doing this, I recommend getting in touch with a therapist. Online bullies who target people for “problematic behavior” are often narcissists who are trying to get away with satisfying their need to punish and harm others who have unintentionally caused them distress while simultaneously satisfying their need for applause. There are other ways to resolve problems. The fact that they choose to wage sustained bullying campaigns is because of their personality disorder, not because it’s an effective or just tool for solving social problems.

=================

So recently, a good friend of mine, mx, has been getting bullied and harassed by some folks in the DC fandom. The circumstances are complicated and stupid and basically amount to a bunch of emotionally fragile morons deciding that because my friend argued that a character is asexual because they grew up under messed up circumstances and didn’t develop into a fully realized social being, my friend mx must be acephobic. Now I will fully admit that the phrasing mx used, when taken out of context, sounds really horrible! They used the expression “barely a person” to describe the character. This is an expression that we use among our friends group in a joking way to describe a character (never a real person) who has not been fully realized as a social individual within whatever fictional world they exist. It’s not so much an attempt to deny the character’s humanity as it is describing what has happened to the person as a result of their life circumstances. Personally, I disagree with the idea that social circumstances would affect a person’s sexuality. Maybe it would affect their ability to relate to people so that if the person was demi or greysexual to begin with, it would push them away from the possibility of sexual relationships altogether? I can certainly see it contributing to a person being aromantic. And if I had been a part of that conversation that’s what I would have argued to mx. I myself am asexual. It took me a long time to come out as ace and I had to deal with a lot of shit from random people, family and friends. But you know who never gave me any trouble? You know who always listened to me and supported me? It was mx. They were 100% wonderful about it. They never ever made me feel uncomfortable. They never made any weird advances or comments to me, even before I came out, which other close friends have done. They never pressured me to be anything different than what I am. Never made even the slightest suggestion that there was anything odd about my identity. And they tried to tell me why I am the way I am or dissect it. They let me speak for myself. And the reason they did this is because I am a real living breathing human being and not a fictional character. You see, mx and I are the type of people who make a distinction between how we talk about imaginary constructs and real people. We differentiate in how we treat fictional representations and actual humans (and I guess furries too. I know a lot of furries. I don’t want to exclude them.)

So these assholes have been sending mx nasty messages, harassing them on multiple platforms, gotten them kicked out of a ton of Discord servers and are approaching anyone they come in contact with telling them that mx is a dangerous person because.... I don’t know, I don’t really understand their argument? Because mx phrased something in a way that reminded them of something fucked up other people have said to them? Nevermind that mx did not remotely mean it in the way that originally hurt them did. They can’t target the original person and mx presents an easy target so here we go into the land of scapegoats. I guess some people just want to find reasons to be upset about something so they can have an excuse to bully and harass others. Because if this was really about them getting hurt, as they claim, then why go to all the trouble of destroying the life of someone who doesn’t believe the things they claim? And it’s pretty clear they don’t based on how they treat the other people in their life who are ace. Now these folks have known mx for maybe half a year and in that time have had very shallow conversations with them about comic book characters. It’s hard to make any sort of real assessment of a person based on that. However, they’re now going around telling people that mx has now for 10, 15, 20 years, some of whom have known mx IRL for that whole time, some of whom know mx’s family, some of whom have lived with mx, in other words, people who are very close to mx and know them extremely well.... these asshats online are telling them, “Oh, mx isn’t who they say they are.”

Right. Because after having some disagreements about comic books in an online chat group, you have the full measure of a person. Because you can definitely tell everything about a person based on how they’ve analyzed a character and not based on how they actually treat real people that they know for twenty years. I think, given that I have heard every intimate detail of mx’s thoughts, feelings and life for the past twenty years because I am the kind of person they confide things in, even the fucked up things, I have a much better sense of who this person is than a bunch of whiny little bullies who take pleasure in harming as many people as they possibly can while looking justified in their abhorrent and despicable behavior by throwing up some fake front of social justice.

Oh, and one of these people deserves special mention. They’re a white person who claims to be a POC. They do so in order to call other white people racist and so that they can get lots of accolades and sympathy from others. As someone who has had to deal with the effects of systemic racism, this makes me furious. You don’t have to deal with the fear of family members being killed or imprisoned, you don’t have to deal with harsher treatment from the police or judicial authorities, you don’t have to deal with being treated as the brown friend, you don’t have to deal with the fact that there is not a single country in the world where you won’t be under increased surveillance or probable persecution or the threat of rape. So you do not get to claim some kind of moral authority that you think gives you permission to go around acting like a twisted, manipulative, toxic, abusive, sadistic fuck, while everyone lauds you for your imaginary struggle. Acknowledge your privilege and be an ally. Support people. Lift them up. Don’t claim an identity so that you can injure others. That’s seriously deranged.

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dimancheetoile · 3 years

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Rant time (and a fucking PSA too)

(cw: this doesn’t relate to anything personal, mental health-related, or any kind of sensitive content. this is about a fandom thing, so there shouldn’t be anything triggering in here. just to be cautious though, content warnings for strong language, swearing and general angry-ness on my part)

ok so here’s the thing. i know the naruto fandom. i’ve been in it for thirteen years, though not all of it on tumblr. i’m lucky to be part of the older community, where all the people i interact with are adults, mature and sensible, who are able to have constructive conversations about the characters we like, dislike, like despite their flaws and dislike despite their qualities.

now, i’m writing fanfiction because i enjoy it. i enjoy putting down ideas that make me happy, that make me think hard and deep about what i like about the world and translating that into stories i feel are interesting and thought-provoking.

most of my stories can be classified as being a part of the meta-fandom, let’s call it that way, where adults are discussing deep subjects around konoha’s government, financial stability, working system, casts and clans and workforce, where you come out of a discussion feeling like you know more than you did before. that’s what i enjoy writing about, that sort of deep worldbuilding. i love writing it like rae loves her fluff, y’know? that’s just my thing.

i can’t control who reads my stories like i can control who i interact with on tumblr. and even then, sometimes i get pos on tumblr, so i’m not safe from them anywhere. but generally, as most of you know with g.o.d for example, the worst offenders are on AO3 and tend to be horrible people in comment sections. and that shit happens:

ok so apparently i am “basing their relationship on hating sasuke”. great. i never did that. learn how to read. this is a crackfick based on a stupid, comedic concept, and ino proposes to sakura in a joking manner. now if you’re allergic to sarcasm, it’s not my problem. but here’s what i have to tell you, and every single person who ever read or will ever read my stories:

IF YOU ARE A SASUKE STAN, YOU SHOULD NOT READ MY STORIES

I REPEAT

THIS IS A PSA

IF YOU ARE A SASUKE STAN, YOU SHOULD NOT READ MY STORIES

aside from a few exceptions, he is rarely treated well in my works because he is a character i dislike greatly. now, here’s the thing. i have taken great care in warning people about this. i have written an entire page, linked on my blog, about the content i write about, and more importantly in this case, a list of characters i don’t like. here’s what it looks like:

this list hasn’t been edited in YEARS. so it’s not my problem if you go to read my stories and don’t find a sasuke fan. and i mean, if it was just the one comment, i would never even consider writing this post. except it’s not.

(yeah, i’m not blurring their name, i regret having blurred the name of the commenter above but i did it a while back and deleted the comment so i don’t know who wrote it. reason why is, this shit is public. i don’t condone harassment, and i don’t need people to defend me, but if they didn’t want people to read their comments, they would have gone in guest mode. however if i see anyone being shitty back instead of engaging in polite discussion, i’ll delete your comment, ok?)

now what do you noticed here? yeah, those are two comments posted ON TWO DIFFERENT STORIES.

my take on sasuke is tired? you’re sad at my treatment of sasuke? on TWO DIFFERENT STORIES? yeah, do you a need a fucking reminder that i dislike the character a real fucking lot? DONT FUCKING READ MY FICS OMFG IT’S NOT HARD TO UNDERSTAND. LEAVE INSTEAD OF LEAVING COMMENTS.

(and btw, those are not the only comments this person left me, and most had the same kind of tone to them)

so let me repeat something real quick.

If you like Kishimoto’s Sasuke, don’t fucking read my fucking stories. If you don’t like my fanon version of Sasuke, be it when he’s the bad guy or when i try to redeem him, don’t fucking read my fucking stories.

there are literally countless stories online of this fandom, where sasuke is viewed in a much more charitable light than i ever will, and that, imo, he will ever deserve. this man is a piece of shit and his tragic past is not an excuse for it. newsflash people, i have chronic depression, i’ve survived sexual assault and i had an abusive childhood, and shocker, i’m not a psychopath with zero capability for remorse, empathy, human decency, healthy relationships and respect, like your precious emo boy. your tragic backstory is not an excuse for horrible, abusive behaviour, and if you think so, you need therapy. slapping that kind of behaviour on a fictional character, then defending it, doesn’t make it suddenly okay either.

i don’t need those kind of comments in my life, i don’t want your fucking concrit and unless it’s been asked, don’t fucking give it to authors unprompted. if you’re not happy with what you’re reading, buy a fucking book, or even better, browse the endless catalogue avaibale for free online, written by passionate people who pour their heart into their stories. next time you feel like being a fucking asshole, shut the fuck up and go write your own stories instead of whining about other people’s works.

ok rant over now.

#mako talks #mako rants #the problem with the naruto fandom #it's the tag i use for posts like this #not saying this is like the main problem of the fandom

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radramblog · 3 years

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Linkin Park Retrospective Part 6: The EPs

I can’t listen to One More Light yet. Don’t have it in me to tackle that. So instead, we’re going to cover the two EPs released by the band, Collision Course and Songs from the Underground.

Collision Course

…who’s idea was this?

Apparently MTVs, as part of an “Ultimate Mashups” series, though their involvement seemed mostly hands off. A 6-track Jay-Z/Linkin Park crossover album isn’t an idea I would have tried to sell, but Mike and Jay seem pretty into it based on the snippets of studio chatter you get in between tracks. The album opens with that, in fact- Chester (?) going “I ordered a Frappucino where’s my fuckin Frappucino?” is certainly one way to start things off.

I’m just going to make it clear now that I’ve never heard most of the Jay-Z tracks being mashed up here, so I can’t really comment on that end. As these tracks are mashups with songs I am quite familiar with, though, I can at least give some degree of assessment. And unfortunately, I’d argue Collision Course compares unfavourably to Reanimation as far as crossover albums go. Largely speaking the remixes done to the Linkin Park instrumentals are uninteresting, though they do match the new vocals done over the top of them, and Jay-Z is basically fine but not overwhelming.

I think my biggest issue with this album is that a bunch of the songs just drop just about everything new about them and are just the Linkin Park track for the last like minute or so- Dirt off your Shoulder/Lying from You, Jigga What/Faint, and Points of Authority/99 Problems/One Step Closer are all pretty guilty of this. That isn’t to say that the rest of these tracks aren’t good, but this in particular is a sticking point I couldn’t ignore.

Track-by-track, then. Dirt off your Shoulder/Lying from You is the most straightforward track on the whole project, and probably the biggest sufferer from eventually just being Lying from You (seeing as that’s kinda the worst of those three LP tracks). I have no idea whats going on in the instrumental from Big Pimpin’/Papercut, but the Papercut verse on top of that sounds just sort of weird- Jay-Z’s verse fits better, but also, that’s probably the one written for that instumental isn’t it. Jigga What/Faint is interesting, with the first half’s backing being a heavily remixed version of the verse instrumental from Faint, but a minute in it’s just Faint oops. With that said, Jays bars over that instrumental actually does fit pretty well.

I don’t know rap that well, I can’t really comment on the flow or anything, but while the vocals are new recordings, they are the same verses from the songs being mashed up, so some originality is lost there.

youtube

Numb/Encore is the one single from this album, and it’s definitely one of the better ones, yeah. You’ve got Mike and Jay both working together in bits, the remixed Numb instrumental feels like exactly the extrapolation you’d want for a track like this, and that “what the hell are you waiting foooooor” is super satisfying. Unlike some of the other tracks, the final bit (with Chester, yknow, doing Numb) maintains that remixed instrumental, making it stand out a bit better from the original versions, which is nice. However, Jay-Z basically just isn’t on the latter half of the track, making it extremely awkward when he did a live performance of it after Chester’s passing.

For a song called Encore, however, it’s a bit weird that it’s not the last track on the album.

Izzo/In The End opens with this really bright instrumental and Mike, thanking a live audience like it’s a concert, sure. It’s just super odd that this is the same song with the In the End vocals, the emotions not really fitting the fun of the instrumental and previous verse. It is performed significantly more light-heartedly, but it still feels like an odd fit. To be fair, though, I’m not sure what Hybrid Theory/Meteora era track would have worked better there, so fair play. The album ends with Points of Authority/99 Problems/One Step Closer, ther first half of which I actually think is better than Numb/Encore. It’s got an actual fresh verse from Mike over Points of Authority, and him doing the cop bit from 99 Problems’ pull over bit actually works super well. Unfortunately, when the instrumental switches over to One Step Closer, the song gets a bit worse- the mix on Jay-Z’s vocals is way too low for a lot of it, being drowned out by the instrumental most of the time, and the last minute is just One Step Closer again but also Jay-Z is occaisionally repeating the 99 Problems line. It’s a weak finish to an otherwise solid song and album.

Songs from the Underground

Released in 2008, Songs from the Underground is a collection of tracks from Linkin Park Underground collated into an EP along with a couple of unreleased live recordings. Linkin Park Underground, or LPU, is the official fan club, which gets a yearly CD as part of membership that has assorted demos and live versions on it, which is where this EP pulls its tracks from- its also a set of CDs I desperately want to get my hands on but their limited nature makes their price obscene. I have managed to get LPU 9, which is the one I wanted most, but the remainder have eluded my grasp.

My precioussssssssssss

Side note, this album isn’t on spotify, and the only Youtube upload I could find was a shit recording, so you’re best off looking for each individually.

This compilation opens with Announcement Service Public (from LPU6), a pretty decent instrumental with Chester screaming unintelligibly in the background. This is more of a joke than anything- as the name suggests, it’s a PSA reversed, and reversing Chester’s vocals reveals he’s yelling a reminder to brush your teeth and wash your hands. I mean, I’ve been in an LP mosh once, and I can confirm that this was an announcement that needed making.

The second track QWERTY (LPU6), sounds like it wasn’t even written by Linkin Park, rather, one of their contemporaries. Allegedly, they wrote it on a long, long plane flight, which I could see- a non-studio environment leading to a more different track. Honestly, this could fit right on to Meteora, as much like Faint or Nobody’s Listening it’s a different take on the sound they’re known for. This one’s a lot of fun- the riffs are sick, and the chorus, if simple, is solid to sing along to. This deserves main album status.

And One is one of the tracks on this album that’s actually a rerecording off of the EP made by the band when Hybrid Theory was their name and not just their first album (though the EP was self-titled, so it’s pretty confusing). This album would later be rereleased as the first LPU, and then again (with an official video) along with the 20th anniversary edition of Hybrid Theory. And One is interesting, as it’s the first track recorded after Chester joined the band back in the day, and it’s so fucking edgy holy shit. I think it’s pretty decent, but unlike with QWERTY I’m kinda ok with this being a little by the wayside. With that said, I really like the little breakdown at the end, and the verse Mike is doing over it.

Sold My Soul to yo Mama (LP4) is a real track, huh. It’s a short, heavily electronic piece, ganking lyrics from Points of Authority and Papercut, but like, it’s mostly just Joe Hanh fucking around for 2 minutes. Not a huge fan of this one.

Dedicated (LP2) is another of this album’s better songs. It’s very Lose Yourself, that sort of emotional rap track about doing a rap track, and while obviously it’s not at the same level as that one it’s still excellent on its own. This is just such an excellent demo, one of Mike’s best performances- and considering he’s carrying it on his own (I’m not sure Chester’s even on this, unless those background aaaahs are him) that means a lot.

The next track is Hunger Strike, actually a live recording by Chris Cornell (of Soundgarden and Audioslave fame) with Chester as a feature. They were good friends, which is going to come up tragically when we get to One More Light. To be honest, though, this track kinda sucks dick. It is far from Chris’s best performance, nor Chester’s, and the instrumental is fucking boring. It picks up around the two minute mark, but at that point it just sounds like a bad Audioslave song, and I’m not really down for that, yknow. Just go listen to Like a Stone or Black Hole Sun again.

Another live recording is next, My December (a B-Side from One Step Closer, also on LPU2). My December is far from my favourite track- I think it’s kinda overdone, and this live version is so much worse. Look, it’s just Chester singing over someone (maybe him?) playing the song on piano? It doesn’t work, man. Not a fan.

The album’s final track is called Part of Me (HTEP/LPU1), and feels a lot like a better version of And One, if I’m honest. Mike’s actually going hard here in the verses, especially in the pre-chorus, and said chorus is actually pretty solid, even though the instrumental there is a little weak. It’s a slow, chugging song, heavily affected through Hahn’s DJing, that does do a nice little build to the track’s ending.

Except it doesn’t end, because there’s a hidden track in it. I don’t think this one has an official name anywhere, but it’s an electronic instrumental. It’s basically ok. Tangent, but I remember thinking when I was younger that if I was ever in a band, I’d want to write an electronic instrumental named Oxymoron- because of course, it wouldn’t have any real instruments in it.

That closes out Songs from the Underground, and I’ve never really broken it down in my head before, but it’s a lot more mediocre than I thought. The live songs are not good, and several demos or rarities that should have been on it absolutely weren’t- Across the Line, Drawing, A6, and where the fuck was High Voltage? Honestly, more of a miss than I remember. If I’m low on ideas, I might break down LPU9 individually, but I probably won’t spend any other time on LP demo stuff- I’m sure you’re sick to death of me talking about Linkin Park by now.

#ramble #linkin park #music

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suhoerections · 4 years

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psa about my writing you don’t have to read but i’m angry;

i write fics and they take me ages cause i’m a perfetionist who’s extremely ambitious and takes forever to edit, etc. and yeah i know i have like <10 on this blog but i’m trying hard to write faster and get it out so you guys can read.

But I’m high key tired of people ignoring them. It took me months to plan and write UN Village, Temporary fix and Impulse Control - not to mention Sinful Pleasure, Hurt and some of my earlier ones. I put my heart and soul into those fics yet all my followers seem to want is to consume the shitty <500 word shit i pour out at 1am when i’m horny and high on sleep deprivation.

Yet, other authors on this site seem to be gaining recognition over their fics, over their writing and look, that’s good - they deserve it. But from my point of view, people like the fic, maybe leave a comment/ask/reblog in the first week of it, then forget about it and move on. Its honestly, extremely discouraging and I want to leave this hellsite and not write at all. I love it, its a hobby I’ve had since I was 8 and have been trying to perfect for years, yet, seeing all this shit makes me want to stop.

All I’m saying is leave a comment on a fic, leave an ask, leave something to show you appreciate the work they put into it. And stop consuming them, the <500 word things are for consuming, fics are for enjoying, so please, be more mindful and realise that just liking the fic is quite discouraging and rather leaving a reblog/comment/ask is much more inspiring.

I’m only feeling like this because I haven’t been seeing much happen lately on this blog, barely any interaction or anything and I feel like no one wants me to write so I’ve given up in a sense. I am trying to write and honestly the only person that makes me want to write nowadays is @mayrubyy aksjdfha i better stop cause i’m about to go on an essay rant about you may but i love you <3.

ok anyways you can ignore this because this is me just ranting about everything and i’m sorry i’m just tired of things i put hard work into just getting liked and consumed and not recognised. Thanks.

#lol #ig this is me saying #don't be surprised if i leave one day

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mrsspidermanmaryjanewatsonparker · 5 years

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Peter and MJ in Far From Home

SPOILERS!

I will be talking about the movie over all but I feel given the subject matter of this blog that this aspect of the film deserved it’s own section.

Basically they did our ship a disservice.

If you ever see anyone daring to bring up the MCU movies as superior to the Raimi films and are using the Peter/Mary Jane romance as ammo against the latter shut that shit down because they don’t have a leg to stand on.

I’m not going to die on the hill of the Peter/MJ romance under Raimi being the best thing ever or there being the greatest possible chemistry there. But at least from a plotting point of view it was competently executed, at least it was believable on paper. *

In this movie it’s like they hook up because the plot says so.

And I know this because in Homecoming, Peter had a crush on Liz and Michelle was...a rude jerk to him basically and then abruptly at the start of this film BOOM Peter has the hots for MJ. Out. Of. Nowhere.

In fact he’s MORE into her than he was into Liz.**

In Homecoming Peter’s drive revolves around his relationship with Tony whereas in this film his primary motivation at first is to hook up with MJ until that goal then has to be weighed against being a hero. Chunks of the movie are dedicated to him thinking about ways to get close to her, to get her the right gift, to take her to the right place, to charm her basically. And further chunks are dedicated to the obstacles he faces to that end (namely a deep cut comic book reference from Marv Wolfman’s run which was kinda cool)*** and her gradual reciprocation of his feelings...oh and her knowing he’s Spider-Man.

In contrast Peter’s feelings for Liz weren’t nearly as big of a deal and yet somehow were much more believable.

Oh and to say the PS4 game delivered a better relationship would be an understatement. I think we all knew that was going to be the case going into this but even I wasn’t expecting the chasm to be this big. I thought we’d get a competent teen romance story if nothing else. But we didn’t even get that.

As problematic (in all the ways you can use the word) as the John Hughes movies that MCU Spidey borrows from are, they were better than this.

I think the word that comes to mind the most when looking at the handling of the relationship is ‘rushed’.

And yet ironically when they finally do get together their first kiss is awkwardly overlong. I mean maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaybe that was the point because they’re awkward teenagers but I think it was just incompetence.

I look at both characters and I cannot really fathom why they like one another. They just do because the plot demands it.

You can headcanon and contort the plot as you like but the end result is the film gives you nothing. They are together because...Tom Holland is the lead and Zendaya is a hot property right now I guess.

Now MJ is better than in the last movie, much more likable and less Ally Sheedy from the Breakfast Club. I guess that goes against her prior characterization but I can buy it.

She’s gone from boring and someone you could never see hooking up with Peter because she’s a jerk to him to...well someone who’s a bland goth-lite stereotype I guess but is capable of the odd compliment. Stiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiill don’t see what either of them see in the other though. They have nothing in common and they also don’t have traits that balance one another out.

But that’s all looking at Michelle and the relationship unto itself...how does it stack up as an adaptation.

Well how should I put this?

FUCK THIS MOVIE, THIS ISN’T MARY JANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can’t believe Mary Jane has been given the Dark Phoenix treatment of screwing up once then getting a second chance only to screw up again.

What the fuck are (the live action) Spider-Man movie’s problem with just doing the female love interests from the comics rather than mix and match elements from different characters, AUs and OCs?

At this point Betty Brant and Liz Allan have been the most faithful!

...Sigh...

Okay so first of all if you were still holding out hope Michelle/MJ might not be Mary Jane sorry you are shit out of luck. When they kiss there is a visual reference to ASM #143, their first kiss. They also never refer to her as anything other than MJ in the movie.

So she’s MJ.

And no, despite your hopes she never dyes her hair red either.

As I already made clear her personality is nothing like Mary Jane’s. Which is like disrespectful even beyond how it’d be disrespectful for any character because Mary Jane’s personality is essentially her super power.

I died a little every time she was on screen and uttered some eye roll worthy bullshit about how people died here or there or how she likes broken things more.

It’s not even that they gave her a different personality to comic book MJ’s but rather that they almost went out of their way to give her the absolute opposite personality.

Just about the only thing they sort of took from the comics was her knowing Peter’s identity, but they play it more the way it was presumed she found out before Parallel Lives was published.

It even creates something of a plothole because it’s made clear she learned because it was an obvious secret, so why hasn’t anyone else deduced this besides this cynical high schooler?

I might write more about this as thoughts come to me but that’s all I got for now.

They fucked up MJ, they fucked up the relationship. Go rewatch that fucked awesome texting scene from the PS4 game.

*Hell in a rare instance where I will invoke the Webb movies and Gweema Stoney positively, even those movies did the romance better than this. Put aside the chemistry the pair had, at least you could understand why Peter and Gwen would like one another.

**I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I feel so sorry for Laura Harrier. Not only was she a good actress delivering a likable performance and had chemistry with Holland, but you could buy her and Peter getting together even if it was a bit fanboy wish fulfillmentey. Plus their relationship was seriously plot relevant beyond just coaxing one half of the equation to be in the right place at the right time and ultimately get themselves endangered.

And what did she get for her trouble?

Publicity played up Zendaya, Zendaya gets on the posters which Harrier is wholly absent from and she isn’t even mentioned in this movie.

***On a side note that scene where the SHIELD lady demands Peter strip in front of her and get into his new costume and then Brad stumbles across them...and takes a picture that he’s going to use to prove Peter was trying to hook up with her and thus torpedo Peter’s chances with MJ...

Um....WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An adult authority member lures a minor away into a secluded area and exerts their dominance by demanding they strip in front of them. Then in a state of undress another minor comes across them and their reaction is that this is perfectly fine but they’re going to use this as ammunition to protect their romantic relationship.

Like no dude you just stumbles across a scene from a PSA about pedophiles.

Why was this scene played for cringey laughs it’s really fucked up, imagine if the genders were swapped for a moment holy shit!

#Spider-Man #Spider-Man: Far From Home #MJ Watson #michelle jones #mary jane watson #Mary Jane Watson Parker #mjwatsonedit #Peter Parker #spider-man: homecoming #zendaya #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #gwen stacy #emma stone #marc webb #Sam Raimi #spider-man ps4 #Spider-Man Playstation 4

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fiddle-styx · 5 years

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college/uni taegi recs

some college/university au taegi fic recs!

that which runs deep in my heart by airplanewishes | 16k, 1chp Nothing hurts more than our secrets.

Drag by mucha | 3k, 1chp Dating a musician probably wasn't the smartest idea Taehyung has ever had.

trip switch by dissintegrate | 16k, 1chp yoongi and taehyung make out every time the power goes out in the dorms, that's it, that's the fic

To Carry a Heavy Heart by bagelboy | 9k, 1chp Yoongi and Taehyung meet between the lines

Paint My Heart a Thousand Colours by lovemazekth | 6k, 1chp Taehyung is a college art student who, after his phone dies, stumbles across an old radio that's stuck on the college radio channel. Cooped up in the art studio for hours on end, he soon finds himself intrigued and constantly listening to the deep, drawling voice of the host who always finds something profound to say.

Yosemite and Friends by taebleb | 1k, 1chp Taehyung’s laptop is called Drake, Jungkook is being extremely difficult, Yoongi just wants to get his econs paper done.

Carry Me by tiny_joon | 6k, 1chp Maybe its good you exposed your freak bitch side early. Now your relationship wont be built on lies of you trying to be cool for months. Or In which Taehyung accidentally sends a text to the wrong person and it's 100% not a dick pic

pull me closer by mintyoongee | 8k, 1chp somewhere along the way, the lines got blurred, and through one week the two men find themselves becoming closer. [or, in which taehyung has insomnia and nice friend/roommate yoongi helps him with it]

Everyday Boom Boom (Because of You Boom Boom) by bananamilks | 11k, 1chp Five times Taehyung breaks things with his mind, and the one time he tries to prevent it. [or, Taehyung gets nervous around his crush and magic breaks the tension for him]

It's not what you see, it's who. by dreaminglasael | 3k, 1chp Yoongi never had any intentions of acting on the feelings he had for Taehyung. But he also never imagined Jimin asking him to go with him to see a psychic. Looking around the store, a mirror caught Yoongi's eye. What was a perfectly innocent mirror for everyone else, lit the proverbial fire under Yoongi's feet.

basic witches by thebestofme | 12k, 7chp Usually, students come to the campus witch for potions that don’t truly need magic. Yoongi’s famous all-nighter elixir is essentially black coffee mixed with red bull. But this latest commission needs some odd ingredients. The blood of a virgin? A little harder to procure than unicorn hair. (“Yoongi-hyung, what did you need from me again?” “Tae? How sexually experienced are you? Just. Asking for a friend.")

large, extra cheese, extra sauce (extra you) by vminism | 8k, 1chp Taehyung starts everything by procrastinating. Even unhealthy crushes on the pizza delivery boy.

Like, Comment and Subscribe by mucha | 13k, 3chp “I got twelve new comments on that video about Frank Ocean’s new album. They just appeared, like, out of nowhere? It’s kinda weird, right?” “Were they telling you the album is superior to Channel Orange?” “You wish. No, they were mostly…” Yoongi pauses, searching for the right words. “Well, about my hands?” “Huh.” Namjoon stares into the distance, chewing slowly. Then he shrugs and sends Yoongi a wide grin. “Well, your hands are nice, can’t argue there.” (Or; Taehyung is a YouTuber, Yoongi likes to review albums online, and somewhere between that, they fall in love)

Just Skin by syubology | 164k, 17chp [ This fic is being rewritten; every time someone asks me abt an update, I delete a paragraph from the wip. Have a day. ]

just a psa for anyone going to read this ↑ amazing story:

if you dare give this author any shit for updates i will personally find you and give you a whole ass lecture

this is one of the most famous and wonderful taegi fics out there

and they deserve no shit from people yelling for updates

so watch out

and enjoy this amazing fic

bonus taegikook:

Three in Time of Two by Ivillpunchyouinthethroat | 9k, 2chp And as Taehyung had predicted that night long ago at the park, nothing much had changed between he and Jungkook. They were still Taehyung and Jungkook and Jungkook and Taehyung. One month into their first year was when they met Yoongi.

#taegi #bts #bangtan #taehyung #yoongi #bts fic recs #taegi fic recs #iz recs some fics #daegu boys #daegu boyfriends #taegikook #college/university au #fic recs #agnst #fluff #fanfiction

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thescarletgarden1990 · 5 years

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A Rant

I didn’t watch last night’s episode, because I didn’t want to witness my worst fears come true. This morning, I learned that my favourite story and characters have, indeed, been utterly ruined by those two fuckers I shall not name.

I don’t even know how I feel. I won’t watch this episode nor the next, that is my only certainty so far. I feel betrayed, hollow, sad and mad all at once. I wish this season didn’t exist altogether, because not having an ending would be far preferable to the shit one we’ve got.

I’m not going to detail exactly why this last season sucks so much, because that’s already been told and analyzed by people far more capable than me at pointing out everything that went wrong.

I still have a tiny bit of hope regarding the books, if they will ever be published.

I’m currently switching between two moods: the what’s even the point of it all anymore and the fuck it, they’re not going to ruin it for me. I don’t know which one will prevail in the end, if I will keep being an active part of this fandom and keep writing better stories than Dumb&Dumber or if I will take down my fics entirely. I’m still debating it. I miss writing, I truly do, and I do think that Daenerys and Jon deserve better, but I can’t even read fics anymore, let alone actually writing them at the moment. It sucks, I don’t want to feel like this, but that’s what I got going on for now.

So, yeah... consider this a PSA. To all the amazing authors of the fics I usually fangirl about: I’m sorry if I’m not commenting your stories lately. It just hurts too much, but know that it pains me not to be able to read and support all those brilliant fics anymore. To all my amazing readers: well... I can’t make promises, folks. I had ideas, lots of them, I had stories to tell and characters to love, but right now I just feel miserable and I can’t fucking write. I’m sorry if I’m letting you down.

I might come back to AO3. I might not. I might finish my stories, I might delete them. I don’t know.

The only thing I know is that it has been a pleasure sharing the hiatus with all of you - oh, if only we knew... if only we could have stayed in that delicious limbo forever - that I love you all and that the friends I’ve made are the only thing I’m not regretting about this whole clusterfuck.

#jonerys fanfic #jonerys #game of thrones #game of thrones fanfic

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fangirlunderground-blog · 6 years

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Meta Monday

I got involved in fandom in the mid-90s when I was around 14 years old. My cousin @lyndanaclerio sent me VHS recordings of the Sailor Moon dub, and I fell in love... I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before.

Since then, I’ve been in a lot of different fandoms: from manga to YA, Tolkien to Xena, Harry Potter to Teen Wolf, Star Wars to Marvel, and countless mini-fandoms along the way. And I’ve met a lot of cool people online over the years — older and younger alike, including my best friend of 15 years — on all sorts of platforms. I’ve built myself fandom homes on shitty GeoCities fansites and moderately less shitty sites I made from scratch; on Yahoo! Groups and LiveJournal; on AO3 and Tumblr... and that’s nothing compared to others!

But, last week, I turned 36, and according to some, I’ve already overstayed my welcome in fandom by at least a decade. I guess I’m supposed to put all my comics and collectibles on eBay, swap out my fanfiction with whatever the fuck a beach read is, and spend the rest of my life cloistered in my house where I won’t offend society. (I mean, I’m kind of a hermit, but that’s not why.)

And let me be clear here: by some, I mean some. While there is indeed a frightening trend here on Tumblr, in which some young people have embraced bizarrely conservative views about women and sexuality, with the Trumpian rhetoric to match, I think the problem is bigger than that. I recently talked about the pressure I felt to abandon fandom when I was 25 when Tumblr was still brand new, and nothing like it is today. It’s clear there were (and are) more societal forces at work than just a toxic sub-culture on a struggling platform.

So, this post isn’t about the vast majority of young people in fandom, nor am I here to yell “get off my fandom, you pesky kids!” when no one ever said that to 14-year-old me. In fact, this post is as much for fangirls as it is for fanwomen because you deserve to know that getting older doesn’t mean giving up the things you love. But you don’t deserve to tell others to conform just because you’re uncomfortable that they exist. There are already enough toxic fanboys trying to keep women out of geek culture, so don’t help them hold the gates closed from the outside.

And if you are older, and already let that shit drive you out of taking a more active part in fandom, I’ve been there, and I get it. But you can still come back; not just on your private Tumblr, or your secret AO3 account, but for real and any time. One of the most freeing choices I’ve made is to stop pretending I think all of this is stupid. The world needs more quirky, eccentric women, anyways.

Sorry this one is so long, but apparently I have FEELINGS this month — especially after the Bog of Eternal Stench I had to trot through while researching this one — and there are a lot of people who’ve articulated them better than I did here (see the following meta recs). I promise we’ll move on next week! As always, let the authors know you appreciated their work by engaging however you can. And if you ever feel alienated on this site, please feel welcome to talk to me! 💛

Fandom - Ageism

Adults in Fandom by @littlesystems, [...] There are a lot of different factors at play with the current fandom purity thing. It’s primarily being driven by minors, which is why I’ve used that as a stand-in, but there are older people who are obsessed with this and younger people who aren’t. Nuance! Exciting stuff. I think the two biggest drivers here are a genuine but misguided desire to make fandom a better place, paired with plain ol’ run-of-the-mill sexism. I’m not the first person to say this and I know others have said it better, but here are my two cents. (Mirror Link)

Age and Experience in Fandom by @tppfandomstats, This month’s @threepatchpodcast episode, When I’m 64, looks at fandom and aging. To go along with these discussions, here are some demographic stats from a few fandom surveys on the age distribution in our online fandom communities. (Mirror Link)

Age Appropriate Activities by @telesilla, So this post, another in a long series of “find a bridge club you embarrassing old ladies” posts, came around. And I adulted hard all day and it just really pissed me off and caught me at a bad time. (Mirror Link)

Ageism in Fandom by @badtech-reblogs, Seeing yet another post about ageism in fandom and I’m trying to do some root cause analysis. That ageism in fandom is tied up with misogyny is a given. There is almost no age too young to start ridiculing a woman for her hobbies and interests, and even young girls are expected to have a maturity and patience beyond their years. The misogyny is coming in from the larger world outside of fandom like how misogyny, ableism, anti-blackness etc. seeps into all subcultures. (Mirror Link)

Ageism in Fandom: Too Old to Fangirl? by @ravenmorganleigh, @vulgarweed, et al. Most Fandoms are comprised mostly of women, young and old. It’s interesting to me when Young Women– who are the most likely to champion women’s rights can turn around and show their youth-bias when it comes to Older Women in Fandom. (Mirror Link)

Fandom culture wouldn’t be where it is now if it wasn’t for Old Fandom by @thepalmtoptiger, I almost forgot that ageism in fandom is a thing. Apparently once you hit 25/30 years old you’re supposed to stop having interests in things. People need to freshen up on their fandom history and realize that fandom now wouldn’t be what it is if it wasn’t for older fans. (Mirror Link)

Getting older doesn’t actually feel like anything by @catchmewhispering, The hilarious thing about growing up, that all the ageist people here are gonna very harshly realise, is getting older doesn’t actually feel like anything. You don’t “turn into” an adult, it’s just another year that passes and, sure, it might become easier to make decisions or figure out how to fix a sticky situation but overall, you don’t suddenly Enter Adult World and never have a goofy thought or a messy moment ever again. (Mirror Link)

The idea that you will someday be ‘too old’ for the stuff you find fun by @freedom-of-fanfic, [...] The idea that you will someday be ‘too old’ for the stuff you find fun now is a long-standing cultural message that I’m sure many anti-shippers - many adolescents of all stripes - have absorbed. that message caused adolescent me to think I would outgrow fandom, and I don’t think that message has particularly changed. (Mirror Link)

If other people in fandom are older than you, by definition, they have been your age by @codenamecesare, [...] If other people in fandom are older than you, by definition, they have been your age. When fans write about younger characters, we’re not peering through a keyhole at young people now and creeping on them. We are drawing on our own experiences, thoughts, feelings and memories of what it was like when we were that age. (Mirror Link)

I’m old as balls by @warlordenfilade, [...] Just realize that with 30+ year old franchises there will be 30+ year old people who grew up with the franchise and still love it. Tumblr may be a relatively recent platform but fandom as an institution is waaaay older than I am and the Transformers fandom in particular has fans in their 40s and 50s whom I am personally acquainted with, fans who have adapted from photocopy fanzines and snail mail mailing lists to bulletin boards, newsgroups, forums, and, yeah, tumblr, in their many years of fandom. (Mirror Link)

I wish we’d stop telling each other - and ourselves - that there’s a point at which we’re too old for fandom by @vantasticmess, I spent every year from 14 to 25 telling myself that eventually I’d grow out of fandom: I would get too old to cosplay and I would write my own original stories instead of ‘just’ fanfiction. After all, adults don’t write fanfic and adults don’t make costumes for themselves. Adults get married and have kids and make costumes for their kids and write real stories and get published. (Mirror Link)

“like, i’m not saying that adults don’t have a place in fandom.” by @porcupine-girl, @melifair, et al. [...] Fandom is vast and encompasses a multitude of interests and age groups. We all fandom responsibly, and those who abuse that at the expense of someone vulnerable or impressionable are not tolerated. This does not mean that anyone specific group of fandom should be limited. Nor does it mean that the only entertainment media created ever should be accessible to all viewing audiences. Young fandom will grow to understand this, not only in fandom but in life. (Mirror Link)

“Lmao 30-year-old women don’t belong in fandoms. Go knit or have kids or something.” by @rainbowloliofjustice, @the-salt, et al. [...] It’s the fact I don’t get what these people think happens when you turn 18 it’s not like the second you turn 18 you just immediately lose interest in everything you were interested in at 17 and from then on only like strictly ‘adult™’ things. A lot of people who were in fandoms as teenagers stay in fandoms as adulthood. Fandoms aren’t minor-only spaces and never have been and there’s literally nothing wrong with adults in fandom environments. (Mirror Link)

Older fans are crucial to the survival of fandoms by @muchymozzarella, [...] Not ONLY because they’re literally the ones keeping fandom afloat (AO3 wasn’t created or maintained by kids, let’s just say), but because older fans generally don’t attack or bully or fuck up a fandom by being aggressive or volatile or overzealous, destroying any enjoyment of a medium. (Mirror Link)

PSA by @bugsieplusone, I’ve been sitting on this post for a while because it probably reveals more about me on a platform that I’d rather not reveal but here goes. I’d like to talk about fandom and ageism. If you are older, you are: Allowed to like things, Allowed to create fan works, Allowed to discuss things with other like minded fans, Allowed to participate. (Mirror Link)

Reblog if Older Fans Are Welcome In Fandom by @cameoamalthea, For many fandom is a life long passion that starts young, but being a geek isn’t something you have to grow out of and put away. I didn’t start cosplaying until my 20s (I couldn’t have, and probably won’t be financially secure enough to do all the things I want until my 30s). (Mirror Link)

tumblr’s disgust for older people in fandom by @bai-xue, @awkward-smiley; [...] I’m young now, but I was scared that I wouldn’t be over fandoms when I got older. I’m sick of it, how about we all just like what we like and not judge people? (Mirror Link)

you are never too old for fandom by @hils79, [...] You are never too old for fandom and if you think that’s true I pity you when you reach whatever arbitrary age you think is the cutoff point. (Mirror Link)

You are reinforcing a stereotype by @asocialjusticeleague, @olderthannetfic, et al; [...] Whenever you question a woman’s right to this space because of her age or parental status, you are reinforcing a stereotype that has effects that reach beyond that one situation. The expectation, for example, that 40 year old men be catered to when writing comics, but that characters of interest to 40 year old women are obsolete or unprofitable. (Mirror Link)

#meta #fandom #antis #ageism #age #women #meta monday #fangirlrecs #mm41

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crimes-and-gelato · 5 years

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Only Half a Blue Sky (Chapter Four)

Rating: M Pairing: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes

Chapter Title: One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

A/N: If you're still here, thank you for sticking around! But heavens, you should not trust me. :D Of course, my beta for this chapter had been nothing short but amazing. Thank you so much 12AngelOfDarkness21 (PSA: all remaining mistakes are still mine because I can't write on/at/in properly and so much other more grammar rules). I suck at chapter summary, so I'll just gotta tell you in advance that I have introduced a new character from a different universe. The competition really. So, are y'all ready for Player 3? Well, you don't have much of a choice actually. LOL! But I'm crossing my fingers that you'll like them. And off you go and hope you enjoy!

“Addiction is tricky. For example; a man who quit smoking for eleven years spent fifteen seconds in an elevator with a man smoking a cigarette. He gave in. What I’m trying to say is , I think I love you again.”

Bucky needs to tell Steve about his conflicting emotions. Not conflicting because he’s very sure about how he feels for the other super soldier. Instead, it’s the additional person that’s messing up with his emotions, making it impossible to be satisfied with what he has, when he selfishly craves for someone who is also — supposedly — his soulmate.

He wants to curse the day that Tony muttered his name so casually, no warmth or feelings. Nothing at all. Which hurt, at some point. But not as much as it hurts now, when he can’t tell Steve or touch Tony when he desires to.

Google doesn’t have much about someone who has two soulmates. It rarely happens, according to his research, with JARVIS’ help, of course.

‘JARVIS?’ he calls out, glancing up at the ceiling, where he knows JARVIS’ cameras are located.

‘Yes, Sergeant Barnes?’ the AI dutifully replies.

Bucky likes having JARVIS around very much. The AI is such a great help these last few days, especially when Steve’s been too busy to attend to him. Not that he wants Steve to mother hen him, because that’s really not healthy at all, and besides, he’s the one who suggested independence. But he’s lost his friendship privileges with Tony after the incident .

Ah, the loathsome incident, where he’d learned that he’s Tony’s soulmate, while the engineer introduced him to Dr. Banner. And thank heavens he hadn’t uttered Tony’s name or else the genius would have found out about being bonded to Bucky.

He can’t imagine what it feels like to be tied to your parents’ murderer. What a twist of fate. Cruel, cruel fate. Tony really deserves better.

Tony’s the other person who helps him — sometimes — to ease into the current century. It’s refreshing to have him around because he doesn’t mother hen Bucky like Steve would do. It’s a bonus that he’s got a great sense of humour and a truly amazing ass.

He mentally berates himself for thinking about Tony inappropriately. He feels like he’s cheating on Steve and at the same time defiling Tony’s privacy. God, what is wrong with him?

‘J, do you know who Tony’s soulmate is?’ he asks, trying to play nonchalant again while secretly hoping the AI doesn’t see right through him. But, perhaps JARVIS does, because why else would his heart suddenly start to beat so nervously? He needs to use his Winter Soldier training and calm himself down. ‘Just out of curiosity, y’know?’ he adds when it takes time for JARVIS to reply. ‘Also, you’re not going to tell Tony that I asked, right?’

Shit! He should not have asked that at all. Maybe JARVIS has some sort of protocol that reports things back to Tony?

‘I apologise if it took time to answer your query, Sergeant Barnes,’ JARVIS says, sounding more human with his sincerity. Tony makes such awesome creations. ‘I was checking and rechecking my protocols about your first question. I have observed that Sir takes caution with the soulmate agenda.’ There’s another short pause. ‘But upon my inspection, Sir hasn’t announced the matter of his having a soulmate or not.’

Bucky tries to process the new information. It doesn’t confirm or deny his theory about Natasha and Tony.

‘And as to your last query, I would like you to be rest assured that whatever inquiry you ask from me will be kept private,’ the AI continues. ‘Unless it’s a query that conflicts with my major protocol, which is to ensure Sir’s safety along with the residents in the tower.’

He nods at JARVIS. ‘Thanks, J.’

‘Any time, Sergeant Barnes,’ the AI replies.

It’s quiet again. Bucky’s alone with his vexing thoughts.

He needs to talk to Steve. Or he’s going to go batshit crazy.

Steve’s nowhere to be found in the tower, even when Bucky’s sure that the blond’s not in the Avengers HQ. He asks JARVIS where his soulmate — his first soulmate, not Tony — is. The AI tells him that Captain Rogers is in the workshop with Sir, surprising Bucky.

The two must have mended things between them. Not that there’s something to mend about, in Bucky’s opinion. Steve wasn’t the one who killed Tony’s parents. Bucky did.

The guilt over that fact will never wear out, will never go away. But there’s still a part of him that hopes it will.

He gets into the the elevator and asks JARVIS to bring him to the workshop, trying not to fidget with all of his nerves.

It’s only when he’s on the workshop floor when he thinks that perhaps he should leave Tony and Steve alone, for now. To catch up and go back to their old routines as friends. He’s heard a lot of this so-called friendship from Steve’s own mouth, one of the reasons why Bucky had trusted Tony with his arm, even when he had had his doubts about the genius.

‘JARVIS, are they busy inside with something? Is it okay for me to intrude?’ He doesn’t want to disturb the two’s bonding time, but he’s not sure if he’s okay being all by himself right now.

‘It’s perfectly fine to enter, Sergeant Barnes,’ JARVIS replies, and opens the door for Bucky.

He steps into the controlled chaos that is Tony’s workshop. He’ll never stop being awed by the wonders of Tony’s mind and invention. The future is amazing. And he thinks it might be sixty percent because of Tony’s brilliant mind.

‘Tony,’ Steve screams, pulling Bucky out of his astonishment about Tony’s lab.

The said man is actually up in the air. But he’s also falling, for reasons Bucky hasn’t figure out yet, seeing as he only just entered the room.

Steve’s too far to catch Tony. Captain America looks more panicky than Bucky had ever seen him on this side of the century. For a second he’s reminded of Steve’s face before he’d fallen off the train. Maybe not quite that sort of panic yet, but three steps from there.

It’s only thanks to his super soldier reflexes that Bucky manages to catch Tony before the genius can hit the cold, hard floor, saving Tony from a trip to the medical bay that they both have similar hatred for.

‘Oh my god.’ Steve has a hand over his heart, traces of his fright lingering in his voice. ‘You will be the death of me,’ he tells Tony in his patented Captain-America-is-disappointed-with-you tone.

Tony scoffs and rolls his eyes at Steve. ‘That’s impossible, Capsicle,’ he states with confidence, and with as much authority he can muster while being carried in Bucky’s arms, bridal style. He’s got an arm over Bucky’s good shoulder. Good thing the man had landed with his back on the flesh arm, instead of the metal one.

‘Well, you’re always trying for the impossible,’ Steve retorts, putting both hands on his hips like a cross mother.

The genius gives Steve a proud beam. ‘One of my personal talents,’ he agrees haughtily, which only makes Steve sigh in resignation. ‘Right,’ he says like he’s only remembering that he’s still in Bucky’s arms and looking everywhere but the Winter Soldier’s face. ‘Thanks for the catch, Red October.’ He taps his other hand on Bucky’s metal shoulder. ‘It’s okay to put me down now.’

Bucky obeys. Slowly, and mutely reluctant, but he does.

‘Thanks again,’ Tony says, not meeting Bucky’s eyes for some reason.

‘Do you need to go to medical, Tony?’ Steve asks with a concern he’s trying to mask somehow. ‘Maybe you need to check if there’s a broken rib or bone.’

Tony waves off Steve’s concern and walks away from Bucky. ‘Please, Brooklyn, it’ll take more than a fire extinguisher to break me.’

‘But it almost did,’ Steve points out in annoyance.

‘And in the end, it didn’t,’ Tony concludes, walking further into the lab. He stops near the broken fire extinguisher and a robotic arm, whom Bucky believes to be DUM-E. He pats the bot’s arm, who’s beeping in what sounds like concern. ‘I’m okay, DUM-E. It’s just an experiment gone wrong.’ There’s more beeping sounds that Bucky doesn’t understand, but it seems that Tony does perfectly. ‘Well, that’s lesson learned for you too that fire extinguishers are dangerous little shits.’

‘Tony,’ Steve scolds.

‘What?’ Tony turns to them innocently, still patting DUM-E on its robotic claw.

‘You’re not supposed to swear in front of your kids,’ Steve nags without heat.

‘Right,’ Tony agrees. He turns back to DUM-E. ‘Please don’t use words like fuck and shit because Mr. Rogers gets upset, okay?’ DUM-E beeps something back.

Bucky can’t see it but he can tell the smile on Tony’s voice as he tells his robot the instruction, while in the background Steve makes another sound of protest and mutters a reprimanding, ‘Language, please.’

Tony only glances back at Steve and gives the blond a shit-eating grin, while Steve raises both hands in the air in resignation. But he doesn’t look annoyed, Bucky notes. No, Steve looks far from irritated. The blond man actually has a fond smile on his face despite his attempt to show his vexation.

Steve looks fond. At Tony.

Steve is humouring Tony.

Steve looks fond at Tony and is humouring Tony.

Fucking hell! Steve Rogers is flirting with Tony. Not blatantly, but still... flirting! And Bucky would bet Tony’s whole net worth that Steve doesn’t even know he’s flirting, and practically swooning over Tony fucking Stark.

Of course not. Steve’s loyal to the very core and he’s not going to think about cheating on Bucky. But at the same time he’s a naive punk who won’t even know he’s got a crush even when it’s staring right at him.

And on the other hand, Bucky’s actually not jealous about Steve’s obvious-but-not-so-obvious crush on Tony. On the contrary he’s quite fine with it.

He’s fine with it. Why is he fine with it? He’s not supposed to be fine with it, right? Right? But he is fine with it.

This is a wonderfully, truly fucked up situation. What even is his life right now?

‘Remind me again why I need to be here?’ Rhodey asks dryly. His smile getting tighter by the minute. Tony also notes that his best friend looks tired.

‘Because,’ he not-whines, ‘I needed a wingman. Somehow.’

Rhodey sighs in disbelief. ‘Tony, this is not what the charity event is for,’ he lectures. ‘Finding a one night stand material isn’t why Pepper wants you in these events.’

He scowls at his best friend. ‘I know, platypus,’ he agrees, winding his arm through Rhodey’s. ‘But this is the best place to find someone of my calibre.’ The black man only narrows his eyes at him, as if he’s trying to piece Tony’s thoughts together.

‘You’re not dying from another poisoning, are you?’ He sounds worried, and Tony hates that Rhodey has to have some traumatic stress because of him.

‘No.’ He shakes his head. ‘I just need a new distraction,’ he explains as he subtly eyes Steve from across the room, laughing at whatever Sam is telling him. He looks away immediately, in the fear of getting caught by Rhodey or Steve. ‘I’ve been thinking about settling down these last few months. Maybe.’

Rhodey only stares at him, studying Tony’s face and reading him. ‘That’s great.’

‘Yeah,’ he agrees, and gives his best friend a smile. He expects Rhodey to ask him about details for his plan to settle down, or about his soulmate. But his darling sugar plum didn’t. Thank heavens for that. Because honestly, he’s not sure how he’s going to answer that query.

How does one tell your best friend that you’ve found your soulmate, but will settle for someone else? It’s not very common for people to ignore their soulmates and marry someone else, because such relationship are often doomed. Take Howard and Maria’s for example. Only a lucky few has been able to defy the laws of the universe, been able to stay happy and together despite not marrying their soulmates.

And Tony plans on being one of those lucky few, or so help him.

Besides, if he doesn’t find a suitable proxy, Natasha did say she’ll marry him. So, he’s not really losing here. In your face, universe.

His eyes wander to Steve again. He knows he said he’s going to let go, that he needs to stop being such a fool and move on. For Steve’s sake. And for his own sake, too.

Steve’s in navy blue tux, perfectly fitting him. He looks beautiful like he always does, but even more so than usual. And he’s standing there in radiance, representing everything Tony wants but can never have.

The pain follows like it always does, because fuck his life. Nobody has died of heartache though, right? He will survive this. He’s Tony Stark. Stark men are made of iron.

‘Shall we go rub elbows with your potential spouse?’ Rhodey teases, knowing exactly when best to pull Tony out of his dark thoughts. And this is why he likes Rhodey the best.

He wishes he’d been mated to Rhodey instead. That would have been easy. It’s never painful with Rhodey, it’s always easy. As easy as breathing.

‘Lead the way, sour patch,’ he replies.

Who knew trying to find a prospective mate is as hard as looking for a needle in a haystack. The answer is to bring a magnet. But he’s not quite sure if the magnet that he often uses to make people fawn over him is enough to pull a genuine needle towards him.

And try he will to attract the perfect needle to himself, metaphorically speaking. He’s always been a firm believer in not giving up unless tested thoroughly, until the facts and evidences are as clear as day.

So, he’s going to endeavour this boring gala when he could be in his shop right now and inventing something that could change the world. Or maybe just play catch with DUM-E, U, and Butterfingers. He’d probably formulate a few new schematics out of that. That’s how boring this gala is, all pretentious smiles and fake conversations with people who probably talk ill-mannered things about him behind his back.

But he’s here for charity and Avenger business. The team needs to shake a few hands and keep their ears on the floor for any information about the current HYDRA base they are trying to track, whom they think have stolen Loki’s magical sceptre from SHIELD.

And just to reprimand himself, he keeps himself to the opposite side of the room, where he’s going to be safely away from the Wonder Twins. Steve’s a distraction enough, not to add one James Barnes into the mess that is Tony’s errant emotions.

He truly needs to stop this pining and move on. But also, why was Rhodey taken away by those military guys for “classified” conversation, when he needed someone to distract him from his own lack of self-preservation? And Pepper’s not even here to help him out either. He should have gone with her to that Spain meeting instead.

‘Tell me, Stark,’ a deep husky voice begins, ‘how’s the green energy front doing?’

Tony’s almost annoyed at being disturbed with his long distance ogling, but he reminds himself that it’s for the best.

‘I can’t say financially better than before because that would be a lie,’ he tells the other billionaire, Bruce Wayne, owner of Wayne Enterprise. ‘But it’s doing great because I’m still richer than you.’ He flashes the man a smug grin.

Wayne only gives him a tight smile. ‘And still funnier, I see.’

‘Of course, Mr. Wayne,’ he agrees. ‘That’s my best selling trait.’ He winks at the man.

The other billionaire only gives a quiet amused huff in return.

‘How is it that you two are here together when there are people out there dying to talk with you?’ Dr. Helen Cho asks rhetorically as she approaches them.

‘Helen,’ Tony exclaims. ‘You’re here. And Banner didn’t even say you were coming.’ He wounds his arms with her. ‘It feels like he’s trying to have you all to himself when he knows very much how I love talking to you.’

‘I don’t think I can say the same about you, Dr. Stark,’ she replies, a small teasing smile on her lips.

But before Tony can react and pretend to be hurt, the other man clears his throat to insert himself in the conversation. ‘Dr. Cho,’ Wayne says as a way of greeting and reaches over for Helen’s free hand to kiss the back of it.

‘Mr. Wayne.’ She offers him a smile as he lets go of her hand. ‘It’s surprising to see you in a Stark event.’

‘Makes me curious too,’ Tony adds, attention back at the other billionaire. ‘I mean, you’re usually only out of your cave for Halloween events, right?’ He looks at him from head to toe, the man wearing a dark black tux, along with everything else that’s as dark as the night. His face is also fixed on a feature that Tony would call a Resting Bitch Face. ‘Although, it’s quite refreshing to have you out and about on these special occasions and representing your goth cult.’

Wayne doesn’t react at all, doesn’t break his stoic eye contact with Tony at the unnecessary comments that most would find annoying. No, Bruce is different. He’s perfectly confident in his own skin, so banters and insults don’t stir him at all.

The black haired man studies Tony for a few more seconds as if waiting for the genius to add more jokes on Bruce’s expense. And when there’s none, he merely looks down at his glass of scotch and stirs it slowly, knowing full well that his two companions are watching and waiting for him to say something in response. But the air in him says so otherwise, Tony notes.

One businessman to another, Tony knows how to read the other like a book. Everybody has telltales, according to Natasha. And right now, Wayne isn’t up to retaliate, but he’s luring them in by acting nonchalant about Tony’s statement, making them wait for whatever is going to happen next. Not to mention the sudden mysterious pause, as if he’s contemplating on something.

And people like them value their time. So, if they are giving it some time to think it over, it means it’s important. Bruce knows that Tony knows this too and he’s taking this opportunity.

‘You might be surprised as to what pulled me here tonight, Stark,’ he states smugly before taking a small sip of his scotch, not breaking eye contact with Tony. He brings his glass down and licks his lips, eyes still not leaving Tony’s. ‘I can promise that it will blow your mind.’

Tony’s only a man. A weak man who hasn’t gotten laid in a long time, so no one should judge him if Wayne’s words pushed his mind into the gutter. And, in his additional defence, Wayne is gorgeous too, even not adding that deep raspy voice. He can imagine that voice whispering filthy things to him while Wayne fu—

Okay, not the time. Not even if he’s trying to move on from Steve and denying his growing infatuation for James. Sometimes his libido and heart just can’t work logically. Both keep wanting things that are bad for him.

On the other hand, maybe what he needs is a quick fuck to forget about Steve. Pepper won’t approve of that solution, and it’ll only get him in hot water with the redhead if he creates more scandal when they’re groundbreaking in Europe with the green energy this month.

‘Now, that’s an offer I can’t refuse.’ He gives Wayne a lewd smile, expecting the other man to either show a hint of annoyance or back off completely. But, contrary to his prediction, Wayne’s eyes only grew more eager. Interesting.

They’ve known each other for a while, since that terrible Stark Expo where Vanko extracted his revenge. And they’ve always been competitive with each other. So, he’s out of his depths as to why Wayne is even interested, and since when.

That, or Tony’s reading it all wrong. But whether Wayne is indeed promising him what Tony is fantasising, or it’s truly just business related, he’s willing to find out either way because it’s the very distraction that he needs.

‘Trust me, you won’t regret it. I’ll make sure of that,’ Wayne vows solemnly, a layer of the smugness from awhile back vanishes, replaced by a small earnest smile. ‘Shall we, Stark?’ He offers his hand out to Tony like the proper gentleman he is.

He’s not sure if Wayne’s voice was suddenly softer than they were before, or if Tony’s imagining shit again. And for the life of him, he didn’t blush. He didn’t. Or maybe he did because Helen’s trying not to smile at Tony’s reaction. He’s not actually sure what’s on his face right now because he didn’t see this coming from Wayne.

He composes himself again and puts on his media mask. ‘Well, since I’ve always been up for anything different,’ he replies lightly and takes Wayne’s offered hand. ‘I guess I’ll see you around, Dr. Cho.’ He unwinds his other arm from hers and places a kiss on her cheek.

‘Sure, Tones.’ She kisses him back and whispers, ‘Enjoy. But not too much.’ And when she pulls back she winks at him cheekily.

Tony laughs at that. Bruce might be right and he’s becoming a bad influence on her. ‘And if you see my dear Rhodey, please tell him Goth Man has me, okay?’ he says while winding his arm through Wayne’s. Helen nods. ‘And you,’ he turns to Wayne, ‘stop calling me Stark it sounds as if we’re strangers when we’re practically frenemies.’ He rolls his eyes at the man.

‘Fine,’ Wayne agrees, though it sounds more like it’s a compromise and not something he happily obliged to. And Tony needs to remember that Wayne is a businessman like himself, who often doesn’t agree to someone else’s demand. They are people who are used to other people agreeing with their condition. ‘As long as you stop calling me Wayne, as well.’

Ah, there’s the compromise.

The other man leads them away from Helen slowly, and they talk as they walk.

‘Fine,’ he agrees, copying Wayne’s — Bruce’s — tone. ‘But that would be very confusing, y’know?’ The other billionaire gives him a quizzical look. ‘I already have a Bruce in my life… Dr. Banner.’ And if Bruce notices that Tony says his name deliberately, the other man doesn’t seem to mind.

‘I’m sure you will find a way to clear all the confusion, Tony,’ Bruce reasons. Maybe he says Tony’s name like it matters, like Tony has value, but it’s not enough.

Tony needs to accept that anyone can say his name with such love and adoration, but still have him feeling like it’s not enough. Only Steve could be enough.

Bucky stays by a corner nearest to Steve because crowded places still freaks him out. He’s rounded the perimeter thrice and knows all the exits by heart. He’s counted all the people in the gala, including the guards and secret agents. The feeling of the glock in his waistband is a comforting feeling, along with the rest of the knives he brought — total of eight, and Steve only has to know of two.

He also sticks to the corner because he doesn’t trust himself. Doesn’t believe himself capable of any semblance of self-control without Steve’s close presence to ground him, and remind him that he’s at a public function; and no it’s not allowed to stab someone with a knife just because their touch lingers far too long on Tony’s shoulder, or when they bat their eyelashes at Tony.

And that’s why Bucky has to stay by Steve’s corner of the room, when he’s itching to go over across the room and pull the engineer away from the rich looking guy in all black ensemble.

It doesn’t help that Dr. Helen Cho, bless her soul, is lucky enough to have Tony’s arm intertwined with hers. So lucky. Bucky wants to have Tony all dolled up in a tux on his arm too.

But life is unfair. Well, half-unfair because he’s got Steve. He’ll always have Steve and his warm smile, that’s full of love and concern that he throws Bucky’s way from time to time. And it’s everything he needs to survive this charade.

He told himself that he shouldn’t look across the room to where Tony is. He shouldn’t because it will only hurt, and will only make him angry with everyone that’s touching Tony who’s not him.

As if that task is easy. Not even with Steve to distract him, because Steve in a deep navy blue tux is a great distraction. But it’s not enough. Not when Steve has a job to do at this party, and is usually away from Bucky’s quiet corner near the wall.

So, pining over Tony is inevitable. It doesn’t help that the man is definitely the life of the party. Every person tries to get to him like moths to a flame. Tony is in his element, shining so brightly amongst these throngs of dim people who don’t care about anything or anyone except themselves.

Tony looks beautiful like this: surrounded by great splendour and important people but burning far more radiant than all of them combined. He likes this side of the engineer, even when Tony’s smiles are dimmer than the ones he gives back home. It’s still a sight to behold.

God, what would it feel like to see it closely. If he allows himself, he wants to be pulled in Tony’s circle and listen to him talk and move those lively hands of his. He wants to be part of those secret smiles he sends Rhodey when people aren’t looking.

But he can’t. He needs to look out for Steve, and at the same time contain his murderous glare of jealousy out of the public eyes.

He’s about to make peace with himself and stay where he is, and not disturb Steve or Tony, when the rich man from before is suddenly offering his hand to Tony. Dr. Cho looks like she’s swooning. And Tony… he’s flustered. From this distance it almost seems like Tony’s blushing.

‘Steve,’ he calls as he strides towards where his soulmate is. There must have been something concerning on his face because Steve’s face is masked with worry as he excuses himself from the group he was talking with.

‘Is everything okay, Buck?’ Steve pulls them away from the group, Bucky thinks. But he’s not sure because his eyes are glued once more to Tony, who now accepts the outstretched hand shyly.

Bucky’s going to break something, or cut someone’s hand. So, he looks away and faces Steve instead, because he needs those blue eyes to ground him and to stop him from doing something he will regret.

‘Buck, what’s wrong?’ Steve asks anxiously.

Only his great training under HYDRA could have masked the real wrath he feels deep within his chest right now.

‘Who’s that guy?’ He jerks his chin sharply towards Tony and the dark-haired stranger.

Steve follows Bucky’s gaze and doesn’t see the way Bucky’s feature clouds with more jealousy and anger as Tony snakes his arm over the man’s own.

‘That’s Bruce Wayne,’ the blond supplies. And Bucky can tell the small hint of dejection in Steve’s voice. ‘I didn’t know he was coming. Tony always said he’s a reclusive billionaire.’ He turns back to Bucky with a smile that doesn’t sit quite right on his lips. ‘Well, I guess he’s not so recluse.’ He glances back once more to the leaving pair.

‘I don’t like him,’ he states in a low growl.

Steve’s attention is on him again. ‘He’s okay, Buck,’ he assures doubtfully. ‘He’s actually friends with Tony. Wayne’s someone Tony trusts. So I guess he’s okay.’

Christ, Captain America having to repeat something twice and sounding like he’s trying to convince himself, rather than the other person is a painful thing to watch. Bucky wants to shake Steve and point out the truth that’s been staring Steve in the face the whole time.

‘I still don’t like him,’ Bucky says instead of pouring the reality of his own jealousy into the picture. ‘Tony could do so much better than that goth man.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Well, that man is going to be Tony’s boyfriend,’ Bucky explains as softly as he can, but the venom in his voice still colours his statement.

‘Boyfriend?’ Steve’s eyes are so wide with surprise. ‘Tony’s not gay,’ he whispers.

And that’s another surprising fact he didn’t know about Steve. Well, he did know that his soulmate can be quite oblivious. Just not this oblivious.

‘Oh, Stevie, I have news for you…’ He drapes an arm over Steve’s shoulder.

Bucky’s quite sure with his facts, he’s seen Tony looking at Steve’s ass, at Thor’s biceps when he’s around. Hell, he’s even dug old files about Tony’s past life and past lovers. And by far he hates Tiberius Stone the most.

IronBatFTW:

Hello, New York! Did you all have a great Friday night? Well, probably not as great as our renowned playboy, Tony Stark, who was spotted leaving the SI charity gala with another well-known billionaire: Bruce Wayne. Some of you must have gone, ‘OMG! Is this finally it?’ I did ask the same question this morning. This could finally be the denouement of our four years of pent up suffering under their slow-burn Jane Austen like love-hate relationship that we have watched since day one after that Stark Expo incident.

You have to be blind if you didn’t see the sexual tension between these two as they try to outsmart the other with their company’s success. It’s such a joy to witness the whole enemies-to-friends trope happening right before our eyes. And now we might just have enemies-to-friends-to-lovers trope that has been everyone’s bandwagon for quite some time now. Because this is it. It might happen indeed.

Don’t worry, little ones. I’ll keep you all updated like always. xoxo

#fanfic #stuckony fanfic #stuckony fic #gwyn writes #stucky #stony #winteriron #bucky x tony #tony x steve #steve x bucky #soulmate au #only half a blue sky

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