#but because I am such a dumbass I could 100% accidentally put my phone into the washer/dryer

[blueberryspyder]

Nothing puts the fear of god into you like forgetting where you set your phone down after starting the washing machine.

[buckysmischief]

running in the dark - 2

Bucky Barnes x reader

Alex Summers x reader

Word Count: 2,224

Warning(s): language, drinking & smoking

Masterlist | Series Masterlist | Playlist

“Good morning, gorgeous.” The smell of pancakes and syrup filled your senses, pulling you out of a deep sleep.

Without opening your eyes you eventually spoke up, “Pancakes and pet names won’t fix anything, Alex. How’d you get in anyway?”

“Wanda slammed the door in my face-”

“-as she should.”

“-so I climbed in through the window.” He confessed.”And I’m not sure there is a way to make up for my actions last night, but I overreacted and I’m sorry. There’s no excuse, I’m just a dumbass.”

In all the time you’ve known Alex, he’s hardly apologized, but in no way did that mean he was sincere. “Look you can say whatever you want but actions mean more to me. Be the boyfriend I deserve or just leave. I’m too tired to keep fighting for something you don’t seem to take seriously at all.”

He’s never been the best boyfriend, but he definitely wasn’t the worst - not that that’s saying much. If he wasn’t willing to put in the work, though, then you could live without him.

“I’ll be better, for us. I promise.” You could tell by the look on his face he meant it, or at least wanted to, even his tone was different than the other times.

“Okay, but you really gotta show me this time, and give me those pancakes before I accidentally push you off the bed.”

After you stuffed your face, you let him cuddle with you. It could have been your full stomach, or being wrapped up in your boyfriend, but eventually you fell back asleep.

This was the side of Alex that you wish everyone else could see, the side where he was soft, gentle, and caring. Of course you didn’t want everyone knowing first hand just how comfortable his embrace felt, that was just for you.

You had known him since high school but were never in the same circles, your paths never even crossed unless you were in detention at the same time. God forbid anyone tried to talk in there though, the teacher was a bitch and would add days just because she could. It wasn’t until a few years ago that you met him and started dating.

Well, you ran into each other at a club, talked for a few hours, and ended up half naked in his bed the next morning. Things were very casual in the beginning, well as casual as exclusive fuck buddies could be. About a year and a half ago you both decided to make things official. That’s when things started getting rocky.

He became more jealous, a lot worse than he was the night before, that was something he needed to work on again. A part of you really wanted this to work out, you’d definitely needed to convince your friends to give him another chance but that was for another day.

Much sooner than you would have liked, Alex was pulling you out of your sleep, “Hey princess, you gotta get up. Wanda’s been blowing up your phone.”

“Ugh, I must be late.” you groaned and rolled out of bed, throwing on a pair of leggings and an on band tee.

“For what? I thought you were off today?”

“You remember Leslie, Pietro’s girlfriend? She’s moving in today, and so is Bucky I guess. I told them I’d help unpack and stuff.” You were lowkey expecting him to freak out, but he looked absolutely calm.

“I know I’m probably not welcome, but I can help if y’all need it.” He knew if he was ever going to make it work with you, he needed to have a better relationship with your friends. He’s trying.

“As much as I’d love that,” you say, giving him a kiss, “I think it would be better to plan something ahead of time.”

“We can go to Topgolf, maybe a cookout on the beach?” A part of you was almost suspicious at how different he was acting, you made a mental note to talk to him about it later.

“A cookout would probably be best,” another ding came from your phone, Wanda was outside waiting. “Come on, you can come back over later if you want.”

He stopped you before reaching the front door, pulling you into a kiss with enough passion to leave you breathless and weak in the knees. “Text me when you get home, I love you.”

“I love you too, have a good day babe.”

You could feel Wanda’s eyes on you from the car, silently judging you. “I’m not going to tell you what I’m thinking.” She said, pulling out the driveway.

“Small blessings.” You laughed.

“BUT, that’s because I’ve said it 100 times and I don’t feel like wasting my breath anymore.” She was thinking you were an idiot who deserves better and blah blah blah, and she’s right, but you learned a long time ago that if you couldn’t get over this crush for Bucky then you’d spend the rest of your life settling for anyone who wasn’t him.

That didn’t mean your feelings for Alex were fake or anything - they’re real - they just didn’t compare to how Bucky had made you feel almost your whole life. It didn’t help that all of those feelings came back the second you saw him standing in your living room.

“So how long is Bucky staying with P?”

“Until he finds a place nearby,” she replied, not mentioning the subject change, “he didn’t really have much though so we're really just helping Leslie.”

“So what you’re saying is the boys are going to do all the heavy lifting while the three of us just organize it all?”

“Exactly.”

As Wanda parked next to the curb you could see the boys unloading the U-Haul while Leslie directed them safely in the house.

Her and Pietro have been together for awhile now, no one knows how long exactly because they’re assholes and won’t tell. They said they’ll reveal it on their wedding day, but everyone knows neither of them are the marrying type. You know what kind of people treat their friends and family that way? People that belong together apparently.

“Thank God you’re finally here!” Leslie shouted as she ran from the front patio to hug them both. “What held you up?”

“Someone had an early moring visitor.” Wanda’s voice didn’t show a hint of irritation, but her mean sideeye did.

“Someone’s just mad no one climbed through their window and brought them breakfast.” Truth be told, that comment was kind of mean. Sam, Wanda’s boyfriend, was currently stationed on the other side of the country and she didn’t get to see him a lot. And yes, if he was here she probably would have gotten an entire breakfast platter made for her. But just because you understand her dislike of Alex doesn’t that mean she has to remind you in subtle ways whenever she feels like it.

“Speaking of food,” Pietro interrupts, “is it almost lunchtime? I’m starving.”

“Who are you, Scooby-Doo? You just ate 30 minutes ago.” Leslie laughs.

“I’ll pickup some wings and pizza,” you offer, walking inside the house, “Where’s Bucky? He’s coming with me.”

“Is he?”

“He owes me eight years, he doesn’t have a choice.”

You eventually found him in the back yard, sitting in the sand. “Am I interrupting anything?”

“Never,” he smiled, “you can sit next to me you know. I don’t bite.”

“Eight year old me would beg to differ, but I’m good. About to pick up some food, wanna come with?”

“I don’t have a choice, do I?”

“Nope, come on.”

Wanda called in the order to the pizza place near the boardwalk, so by the time Bucky pulled up there shouldn’t be a long wait. You decided to walk to the ABC store across the street and grab a few bottles of rum and vodka. If they thought there wasn’t going to be some kind of special housewarming party, they were wrong.

Once you got back to the car, Bucky was walking out with three boxes of pizza and three boxes of wings, “I would have asked you if you needed help but I wanted to see if those muscles were just for show.”

“You got the essentials so I’ll let it pass.” He wouldn’t have made you carry anything anyways, not because he was that nice, he just knew you’d drop at least two boxes.

“Oh, the essentials? Those are getting dropped off later.”

“You’re a mess.” He knew exactly what you were referring to and left it alone at that.

When you both got back to Pietro’s, more of Leslie’s things were inside and ready to be put away, but that could wait until after lunch… and maybe a few drinks.

As the day went on, the five of you successfully got everything organized and as a reward to yourselves, you were going to have a bonfire on the beach. A part of you wanted to invite Alex, but you’d see him later. Right now was about hanging out with your friends - and catching up with Bucky.

Pietro brought out two sheets to sit on while Bucky got the fire started, Wanda and Leslie got the drinks and you grabbed some snacks.

And the weed.

“I bought enough to share!” You shook the jar, letting everyone know if they wanted it then they could take it.

Wanda laughed out, “You know Pietro will.”

“That’s because he’s the only one with good taste.” You winked to Leslie.

It immediately - and rightfully - went to her head, “Isn’t that the truth.”

When the sheets were laid out, Wanda, Leslie and Pietro sat on the bigger one with you and Bucky on the slightly smaller one.

At one point in the evening, you tuned the others out and gave your full attention to Bucky. He was filling you in on all the things he didn’t know you already knew thanks to Pietro not knowing how to keep his mouth shut. The only thing you didn’t know was why exactly he pushed you away, just that it had something to do with his ex. Why not find out now?

“So, why didn’t Natasha like me?” It was better to just come right out and ask, no point in holding back now.

Bucky knew he couldn’t tell you the whole truth, but he wasn’t going to lie either. “Nat was - is, definitely still is crazy. I think it was your third break up with Beck, you called in the middle of the night crying and she freaked out after. Said you were “disrespecting” her and a bunch of other ridiculous things.”

“If you knew they were ridiculous then why did it work?” You asked softly, not wanting the others to overhear.

He wanted to tell you that it worked because it seemed like his only escape from you, that maybe a clean break from you was what he needed to really get over you for good. But here he was, all these years later and still hopelessly in love with you.

Again, he chose to tell you half of the truth. “She told me she was pregnant, but I found out she was lying four months later. First thing I wanted to do was call you and apologize, maybe cry a bit, but I was too embarrassed that I did what I did to you..”

“Buck..”

“No, please don’t. I shouldn’t have just cut you out, you didn’t deserve that.”

There wasn’t really anything to say to that, there wasn’t anything you wanted to say to that. Knowing didn’t make you feel better like you thought it would, truth be told it made you feel worse for reasons you couldn’t even admit to yourself. Instead you hit the blunt and silently offered it to him, slightly shocked when he took it.

On the other side of the fire, the twins were wrapped up in their own conversation while Leslie was silently watching you and Bucky through the flames.

“Hey guys,” she whispered to the twins, “did Yn and Bucky ever date?”

“Ew, gross.”

“No, why?”

If a stranger were to walk past and see the way you two were looking at each other, they would probably think you are dating. “Are you both blind? Actually, that’s offensive to the  blind, even they would know what I’m talking about.”

Pietro looked over to see you both laughing and other than you sitting a little close to Bucky, he didn’t see what his girlfriend was talking about, but Wanda did.

Around nine you texted Alex for a ride since everyone was too drunk to drive, Wanda chose to just sleep on her brother's couch instead. Once you were in his car he put your seatbelt on for you, “Someone’s in a good mood.”

“I just missed you.”

“Can I spend the night? I missed you too.” You said, trying to get as close to him as you could.

“Anything you want baby.” He was keeping his eyes on the road, but you didn’t miss the smile on his face.

“Then can we go to Cookout? I’d kill for a milkshake.”

“Already headed in that direction.” It wasn’t a guarantee he was going to change in the long run, but right now he was putting in effort and that’s all that mattered.

perm tags (46/50): @stuckonjbbarnes​ @valkyriesryde​ @hopesbarnes​ @superavengerpotterstar​ @estillion14​ @sleepingspacedragon​ @geeksareunique​ @imsoft-barnes​ @murdermornings​ @distractedgemini​ @screaming-fridge​ @readeity​ @whatinthyworld​ @my-drowning-in-time​ @buggy-blogs​ @hey-its-grey​ @pinknerdpanda​ @brokenthelovely​ @theannoyingnightmarecollector​ @death-unbecomes-you​ @rhymesmenagerie​ @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​ @https-bucky​ @also-fangirlinsweden​ @goalexis123​ @missmeganrachel​ @sunflowersandcherry​ @miraclesoflove​ @matsumama​ @reann-loves-sebstan​ @thinkoutsidethebex​ @thefridgeismybestie​ @niall2017​ @maddope​ @imagine-all-the-imagines​ @thummbelina​ @m3ga1nsp1r3d​ @romaniansweetheart​ @thebadassbitchqueen​ @king-sebb​ @nerdy-bookworm-1998​ @bonkyboinkybucky​ @slaytherinthoughts​ @kingkassam​ @anti-the-glitch-bitch​ @poppunkdork​

series tags (2/25): @rebekahdawkins​ @writerwrites​

[thebraingremlinsaremad]

Daily Blog #15: August 22, 2021

Dollar Tree is honestly pretty fucking awesome 👌👌👌

I set my alarm for like 6:25 this morning, but it took 6 minutes for the "Horsin' Around" theme song instrumental to wake me up. I was pretty tired lol. I just dismissed it and went back to sleep.

I only went back to sleep because I knew I had another alarm set for 7:00. That got me up.

I should mention that this was still in the RV over an hour away from the house.

After I got up, I went to go get a shower, and did so successfully.

Unfortunately, I had forgotten my brush this time and had to do it afterwards after my hair had a bit of time to dry, which did make it a little more difficult lol.

I got dressed and grabbed my stuff, putting it into my car.

I made it a point to see and say "see you later" to my grandparents before I left for the flea market.

My dad insisted that I stayed to say goodbye to my mom, so I left.

I did NOT have cell service up there, as was mentioned in my previous 2 blogs of which I could only post today, so finding my way was a tiny bit difficult until I got some service to ask Google to take me to "...".

It worked and I got there.

On my drive, I listened to 1 by Simple Kid, a CD I had previously purchased at a Dollar Tree location.

I got a call from the guy at the flea market saying that I had some people there waiting for me. He asked how far away I was, to which I said "about 10 minutes." Ironically, that call made me miss my exit, as Google couldn't talk during the call, and added about 3 minutes to my arrival time lmao.

I did sell the Xbox that he said someone was interested in. I got $40 for it. I spent 27¢ on it. Pretty good return if you ask me.

I couldn't sell it with anything other than a power cord because the controller and AV cables I had been using to play it there were for my personal console. I'm just glad I can actually hook my Xbox up and stop having to drag them to the flea market along with a small library of games.

Not too long after I sold the Xbox, someone came in and asked if I wanted to see some electronics he had in his car. I went out with him. It was a pair of 3ft speakers and a Pioneer audio system with dual cassette decks (although neither of them works) and a 25 Disc CD-changer, as well as the standard AM/FM tuner. Additionally, there was a Fisher amplifier and AM/FM tuner as well as a Fisher Direct Drive turntable. He said he wanted $60 for em, but before that he casually, and probably accidentally, dropped that he was just gonna take em to the thrift store.

Big mistake.

I got em for $35 lmao. THERE GOES MOST OF MY PROFIT.

Oh well.

I tested everything. As I mentioned, the cassette decks don't work, but everything else does apart from the turntable needing a new stylus.

I posted some new photos of the shop to Facebook, and someone soon DMed me about a stereo system.

I priced everything, and it turns out I have about $300 worth of equipment from that deal, the Fisher amp and tuner being worth about $150.

The buyer will hopefully show up next weekend, for he wants to buy the Fisher stuff ($185 with the turntable), the 3ft speakers, an 8-track deck, and a Kenwood deck we've had for a week or two.

The speakers are listed for $50 (and are worth around $100-150), the Kenwood Deck for $50 as well, and the 8-track for $35. That makes it about $320 in equipment. Since he's buying so much, I'll knock it down to $270 and essentially give him the speakers or cassette deck for free lol.

Apart from that stuff, not much happened at the flea market. I sold some records, cassettes, CDs and I think 2 DVDs. One person bought a VHS tape? That money was the other guy's though. Oh well xD.

I can't say that I didn't miss my wonderful partner while on the trip. I actually brought along the stuffed animal they gave me (who's name is Greg) and snuggled with him both nights.

I was very happy to hear from them UwU.

They let me rant and I let them rant.

I honestly give them too much responsibility over me xD. I'm like, "Okay, I'm gonna do this. HOLD ME TO IT."

I know I can't hold myself to anything I personally say (this blog being the only exception apparently), but I listen to them pretty well I think 🤔. If they tell me, "No, you don't need that VCR," so long as it's not some weird specialty thing, like a worldwide VCR 🥵, I'll be like "Yeah, you rite bro."

I love you man xD. You control my craziness pretty well. I'm so thankful for you UwU.

#relationshipgoals

So part way through the flea market day, I went over to Dollar Tree to buy some snack, but ended up looking through the CDs to see if there was anything good. I took photos of about 18 CDs and flipped through them online for the remainder of the flea market day.

I deleted the photos of the ones I didn't want and kept those that I liked. Surprisingly, I ended up buying 13 CDs there, but not before dropping them on the floor like the dumbass I am.

Also, sorry for all the nerd shit I spilled on your lap earlier. No one cares about amps and tuners xD.

I'M LISTENING TO ONE OF THE DOLLAR TREE CDS RIGHT NOW THO.

I already transferred over to my online library on iBroadcast and put the disc into my CD changer, which is now holding 164 CDs.

Its max capacity is 300 discs 🥵

WHY AM I NERD

Oh well

I like being a nerd gurl

Also maybe a technosexual 👀

I get really excited over some electronics. Like. REALLY excited.

Some editing VCRs are like "Holy shit that is SEXY. Look at those goddamn VU meters 🥵. And hhhh there are like 7 inputs on this thing and individual controls for left and right audio gain, not to mention Hi-Fi S-VHS recording. Hhhhhhhhhhh please gimme 😭. Why are you so expensive?"

I uh, mean, uh, *cough* look, pretty lights.

Oh yeah, I was gonna say the album I was listening to xD. MAN I GOT SIDETRACKED.

It's 37 Everywhere by Punchline. Def give it a listen; it's pretty heccin good.

Another notable album I picked up was Page One by Steven Page. I very much like the first track, "A New Shore." It's quite catchy and he has a great voice imo.

Also at dollar tree, I bought a regular bag of Fieras and 2 bags of Fieras Sticks, which were marked down to 75¢/bag because they're expiring soon.

I honestly like the generic Dollar Tree version of Takis more than actual Takis. They're a lot more flavorful when it comes to the lime, but also hotter at the same time.

Don't get the hot nacho ones tho. Hot nacho? More like hot pile of shit.

HAH

Goteem.

They're not that good xD.

THE REGULAR ONES ARE FIRE THO

"How do you do fellow kids?"

I got home and started working on putting the CDs onto my computer, and then onto iBroadcast, but not without first adding The Music Man to my digital library, something I had neglected for a month or two. The CD had just been sitting there lol.

I also switched my digital file for "The Black Parade" to that of the uncensored CD, which I had purchased before I event started working over 2 months ago.

MAN I'M LAZY

I eventually get around to shit tho lol. I guess it's just a matter of priority.

What usually takes priority is digging through everything to find something that I forgot about but then remembered, making a mess in the process that I would then have to clean up, at least partially.

I think the album just ended. I've been writing for a while xD. I'ma start "I Made You Something" by The Island of the Misfit Toys.

I'll tell you where that album came from in a minute.

In the meantime, where was I?

I kinda lost my train of thought despite reading up to see where I was. Oh well. On I go.

I ate dinner and kept working on those CDs, eventually putting my clothes from the week into the washer.

I FORGOT TO PUT MY SHAPING UNDERWEAR IN. FUCKING HELL MAN.

I wanted to wash em for this week 😭

No tight pants for Leonna I guess qwq.

Meanwhile, the box of my CD album cases is overflowing. I need another box.

I keep all of the album artworks in a big CD folder. That's almost full.

I wanna fill my entire CD changer. That's one of my big goals in life. Idk why, but I just wanna legitimately fill the entire thing.

My clothes are in the dryer now. I don't think I have the time (or energy) to fold them tonight. I'll leave that for tomorrow morning before work.

And God. Fucking. Damnit. I start school again on Wednesday. NOT looking forward to that, and neither are my 2 coworkers. We already have low enough staff, but only the two of them working is gonna be a pain in the ass.

I'll still work Saturdays.

I need to contact my guidance counselor to get out of the gym class I signed up for. I scheduled this shit before I found out I was trans, and I don't wanna deal with the fucking locker room situation 🙄 I have far more important matters.

Okay so anyway, the album I'm listening to came from a cassette. I bought this cassette a few months ago at the flea market along with a few others. The reason I bought them? They were all newer cassette releases from the 2010's, and they're all actually pretty good music from very indie bands.

Currently getting mad at iBroadcast's compression algorithm. It's unnaturally fucking anything over -10db up. Oh well, there's not really anything I can do about it.

I have like 13GB of music on my phone btw. That's about 3.5k songs on 268 albums.

I'm kind of an audiophile, but I'm too cheap to pay for a lossless service. Oh well.

They do actually have a lossless service on iBroadcast, but once again, too cheap.

Someone just sent me a friend request who legitimately posted that BLM and the democratic party are hate groups.

BLOCK.

Goodbye ho.

I don't get that. They call the democratic party a hate group when they hate people like me, and I, being more of a democrat although not fully because the 2-party system is fucked, think nothing more of them than they're very wrong about certain things, especially, as shown, that black people, as well as asian, Indian, native, and people of all ethnicities and backgrounds, are not equal to white people.

Yeh.

Totally.

You go buddy.

Anyway, yeah, I can, and do, convert music and video from analog formats to digital files in order for me to archive and listen to whenever and wherever I please. I've actually made a bit of a business out of it, but I don't get too much work from it. At least I'm not overloading myself xD.

I honestly have so much more to say, but I should probably go to sleep soon.

A few final shoutouts to the following people and companies:

-Dollar Tree

-Steven Page

-Broken World Media

-The Island of Misfit Toys

-Simple Kid

-Punchline

-My incredible partner QwQ I love you so much. Thanks for being the best all the time. I hope I can give you the best life ever.

Anyway I suppose this is goodnight. Lmk if you want a full list of the CDs I bought today! I'll link that song by Steven Page here.

And here's a good song from Simple Kid

I really like music lol. Enjoy these pieces.

Anyway, goodnight lol.

Lots of love,

-Leonna.

[devourer--of--books]

So, I just started to play Obey Me! Shall We Date

And well, I have thoughts

Im currently stuck on the first levels of lesson 5, so my knowledge of the plot is limited to that + some spoilers I accidentally got while going though the obey me! tag. Do I have a deep understanding of this game? No. Am I gonna rant anyway? Yeah. See me do another one of these soon after I play it some more, but for now, I need to put this out there:

First, mechanics-wise, the first thing on my mind was "Mr. Love from Hell", which is honestly not too far fetched. Maybe it's because I'm playing in my old ass tablet (I need a new phone, this thing ain't gonna survive 2020) but it's just so slow??? I've tried downloading full data, and it kinda helped, but still, it just annoys me so much! It's not crashing like crazy (cof cof Love Island The Game cof cof) but it could be better, it takes forever to get the itens to level up cards because it just ????????? takes forever for them to load???? anyone else got this problem or it's just my device? Anyway, that aside, I quite like it, if you played MLQC, it's pretty easy to manage, and while it takes a bit more of attention to win battles, I think that's a good thing. Getting shards has a been a bitch, like, I keep on suffering with the loading and my competitive ass wants to finish begginer's missions, and again I think Mr. Love has spoiled me. Also, someone please tell me how to level up skills, because I have no idea???

Now, moving on to the actual tea: what do I think of these boys?

Let's go in order, shall we:

So, I open the app and I see Lucifer in all his red and black glory, furry cape, Dom-Daddy, Big D Energy for days and go "Oh, Demon!Nobunaga, fun!". I'm immediately drawn to him beacause Nobu was my first ever otome guy and while I eventually grew out of the whole "this man is so controlling and sexy and dark" phase, nostalgia ya know? So, turns out the vibe I keep getting from Lucifer is more like all those dark-kinky-Jumin-Han-fanfics (as in, the only parts of Jumin Han that I hate) rather than Nobu? Idk man, this guy just seems shady?? They all do honestly but Lucifer is just plain scary. Dude, I know you've got the whole "most-powerful-oldest-control-freak" going for you but, like, can you chill?

Yet I can't really blame him, cause, Veronica (that's my MC's name) why, girl???? She be going up those stairs, and I'm just ??? Real talk, I'm kinda of a rule follower? I don't wanna make this guy mad, man, all I wanna do is hit on Satan (which we shall discuss soon) and see some family drama shenanigans. Lucifer says "don't go up those stairs" I'd be like "okay???" because up until now he hasn't given me a reason to not trust him (aside from being shady)??? But I have no choice but go talk to Belphegor (don't even get me started on this one) and I can just tell I'm gonna get in trouble for this. Could I not get there accidentally? Do I have to go there against Lucifer's direct orders? I don't think this is gonna go well, I just don't wanna get on his bad side hskshskshk

Lucifer's room, however, is everything to me, the deco is lovely (skeleton aside) and that bed, maaaannnn

Mammon started really annoying but he's been growing on me. I have a soft spot for dumb bitches like him, I guess? He just cracks me up? Not to be cheesy, but I like him as a friend? Maybe that'll change in the future, who knows, but for now that's how I see him, the best friend guy who is gonna be in love with you in every single route (read, Seven, but dumber). Can't wait for the angst. Looks wise I kind got him mixed with Solomon at some point (my dumbass though it was a bug) but all those Surprise Guest moments have me thinking he's way cuter than I gave him credit for at first.

I always feel bad for ratting him out to Lucifer, but boy, you and Veronica practically share one single brain cell, okay? I need to get my girl into Lucifer's good graces, I ain't about that troublemaker life

Levi is gonna be brief: No. He's not my type (otome or real life wise) and he annoys me. He reminded me a bit of Yoosung at first, and I'm trying to power though it like I did with him, but I can't. He keeps dragging me into his stuff and it's not cute, it makes me resent Levi. I'm not much of a tsundere enthusiast by nature, and I really don't like when they portray fans and gamers in this kinda "I'm weird, look at me I'm so weird and different" light ("have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on? that's weird" jsjdndmsksjdnsmskdjnddm). It comes across (to me at least) as childish and dumb (not endearing dumb, like Mammon). Idk, maybe I'll change my mind? Don't come for me, Levi stans

So Satan

I love Satan

Otome makes you say the strangest shit hm

Still. I haven't interacted much with him but I'm obsessed with this man. Let me date you, okay? You look like posh book-cat-candle super model I wish existed. Let's be petty together. Since I haven't been playing long I hope I don't end up regretting putting my heart and soul into loving you. I'm doing all kinds of jobs to get intimacy go up with him, because guyghbkhiugiygufgfydddyghvjgvjg I'm all about that soft dom energy he has going for him, it's basically everything I love about Jumin Ham, but less CEO and more cute-bookstore-guy. Ideally, Satan is 100% my type, even if not the usual otome route I take first. Also, he is the Avatar of Wrath, which, along with Pride, is my most prominent sin, so I might be projecting

Pls babe don't turn out to be terrible

Kay, so Asmo. Asmo gives me all the Shingen vibes but realistic Shingen. Like, of Shingen is all about worshiping his MC, Asmo looks like he wants to be worshiped himself. Not judging, tho. That thing he said about loving himself above all things, I feel like it was supposed to be shady but I kinda agree? He's onto something. All this self-sacrifing thing is so romanticized. Can't we all be in healthy non co-dependent relationships? Love yourselves, kids. Which is why, while I said Satan is my ideal type of man, in real life, most of the people I've been with are Asmos. That being said, that's why he doesn't really work as an otome LI for me (at least for now). I'm here to live a fantasy of dating demons, not to see my exes. He is tempting tho. Who doesn't want a friend to do face masks and fuck from time to time, no strings attached until, "oh no, we both caught feelings, whatever shall we do" and then have it end well? (can you tell I'm projecting? my therapist is gonna love this). Poor Asmo, it's not his fault. Darling I'm sure you'll turn out to be lovely

On Beel, not much. I'm not into him, at least for now. his personality so far is that he's hungry. So what, man. I'm not here for that either. I don't find food particularly fun or sexy, it's just here to keep us alive (unless it's sweets, sweets are the best, but I'm having to cut down on sweets so), so he's not doing much for me. Gotta wait for that character development I guess

And to end this rant, Belphegor. Bitch, I've seen you on my demon cards, don't you dare tell Veronica you're human. But she's a dumb hoe, my girl Veronica, so she just doesn't question it???? I swear, this girl. Shady doesn't even cut it with him. Sorry, you're telling me what to do? Dude, lol, you're lucky this is Veronica and not me, because I'd be out of there as soon as you started this bull about me doing pacts with demons to get your ass out of that room. Don't prey on my empathy, it pisses me off. Spoilers tell me he's like a human-hater or something? Boy, fuck you, okay? Am I going to end up loving him? Who knows. For now he can rot in that room for all I care

Anyway, that's pretty much my first impressions of this game. I'll be playing it for some more time, until I get up to date on lessons and story or until colleges comes to drag me to literal hell, whatever comes first

Peace, my dudes

[wordsandrambling]

You’re across from me and laughing at something on your phone, and then you tilt it to show me. As you move your hair falls over one shoulder and you tuck it behind your ear absentmindedly. I look for a little too long. You lean back into your seat, an armchair that’s probably over 100 years old. Around us, others laugh and talk, and a barista calls out someone’s name. you look back at your computer, so I look at mine.

“I’m going on a trip next week. Only for a few days, but apparently its important,” you tell me over the top of your laptop. Your eyes leave the screen for half a second, then you look back down as a notification appears. You groan. “Dan just emailed. He recons its something to do with our talents.”

I make a face while you type up a response, then say, “You could always not go. Stay here with me instead. We can watch TV and make mac and cheese not think about talents at all.”

That gets a snort out of you. “But if we don’t think about talents then how are you going to be able to carry all the mugs of hot chocolate in for us?” you joke.

“I’ll wear oven mitts. For the pretence, you know, and maybe I can even wince a bit if I spill anything on myself. Really put a show on.”

You grin, but it quickly fades.

“As much as I’d love to spend several days watching shitty chick flicks with you, honey, you know I can’t say no to this trip. I’d lose my job.”

I nod, and look back down at my computer, and so you do the same.

 ----

“No, I’m sure- your wifi, this hotel is too posh for- have bad connection,” you say, voice cutting out every few seconds. My screen is frozen on a still of you grinning at the camera, and I’m tempted to take a screenshot. I have a whole album on my phone dedicated to shitty photos of you, and I remember the first time you saw it, you laughed so hard you cried, and I remember thinking nothing in life could beat that sound. I hum in vague agreement with what you said, and you suddenly come to life again on my computer.

You suddenly look sombre. “I think I need to go soon, but before I do, I need to tell you something.”

My stomach flips, and I reach instinctively for my soulmark, then catch myself and instead brush my hair our of my face. In 12 years of friendship, you have never seen my mark and I’ve never seen yours. I think I like it that way. At least like this, I can fool myself its you, even though the chances are almost non-existent. Even though you wouldn’t feel the same way even if our marks were from each other.

“Al, it’s Dan,” you say. For a second, my heart drops, until I remember that Dan only has one soulmark and he’s already found her. I ask you what you mean.

“I mean,” you explain, “I’m scared for him. He’s getting brighter.”

“Oh god,” I say, because that’s all I can say. I’m reminded again why you hate your talent so much, because your talent is that. The first time you described it to me, it sounded a little ridiculous, but then we were in that café during our weekly meet up and you could barely look at this woman, she was so bright, and then she dropped dead right there. A heart attack, the paramedics told us. I remember how shocked you were, and how right after it happened you kept blinking as if someone had just turned off all the lights.

When you speak next, I can hear a slight tightness in your voice.

“Yeah, and fast as well.”

There’s nothing I can say that will help, because we both know there’s no avoiding the truth, so I just put my fingers up to my screen as if I could reach through it and get to you. You do the same and I can almost feel your fingertips on mine.

I hear a door open, and then Dan’s voice off camera. He says hi and you look up and immediately flinch and tear your hand away from the screen to cover your eyes.

Dan chuckles. “what, am I that ugly?” he jokes. Dan, who doesn’t know what your talent is. Dan, who’s now bright enough to make you look away.

He continues as if nothing is wrong. “Anyway, I was thinking of going to get some lunch and wondered if you were hungry. Just because I think there’s a pretty great place along-“

An alarm starts somewhere in your building and I see your eyes widen in fear.

“Huh,” he says, “I think that’s the fire alarm.”

“We have to get out of here now,” you tell him, and he says he needs to get his phone from his room. You can’t even look at him as you tell him there’s no time.

I take a screenshot of the both of you standing there together, and then I say goodbye because you need to hang up and when I try to tell you both I love you, my throat closes up. In the end, the words come out forced and strangled, and he looks at me weirdly for a second and then says he loves me too and he’ll talk to me later. Right before you hang up, I think I see a tear on your cheek but I can’t tell for sure because you’re moving the fastest you’ve ever done. Maybe you think if you can get out of there quickly enough, he’ll get darker again. Maybe you’re just trying to distract yourself from the inevitable.

I lie back on my bed and try not to think about what possibly could be happening where you are, and fail, and then tears come and fill my lungs and heart and I’m sinking down and down and I can’t really tell if I’m breathing. The room gets darker, eventually, and after that everything is blank but after a while I wake up and the memory winds me like a punch to the throat. I sit there for a while, staring at my wall, and then I reach for my phone and call his soulmark.

 ---

There’s a lot of in-between time, after that. Time where I’m not quite asleep but being awake is too hard, time where I wander aimlessly around my house, leaving unfinished cups of tea on whatever surface is nearest at any given time. The first couple days were the worst, where I heard nothing from you and was left wondering what had happened. We don’t really know if you can see brightness on yourself, and I had feared the worst. You texted, after a while, just enough to tell me you had made it and Dan had not. I send back the most comforting message I can, and you read it but don’t respond, and then I sit in my room with the curtains drawn and think about all the inside jokes that I am now the only one in the entire world who understands, and all the memories that are solely mine now. I call my mum, but I’m too tired to talk long so she hangs up to let me sleep and I cry instead.

After a week of radio silence, you text me to say you’ll be back in another eight days because things have been delayed. This time, when I text you back, you read it and respond with a heart.

 ---

The airport is crowded, and a man shoves his way past me but he’s muttering something about being late for a flight so I let it go and instead stand on my tiptoes, craning my neck to try to see you over the mass of people. I can see others, presumably from your flight, coming out from behind a pair of white doors, all with tired eyes and messy hair. When someone sees someone waiting to pick them up, they seem to grow a couple inches, and a smile appears on even the most annoyed faces.

Right after a big family with at least five children walk through the doors, I see you, dragging your suitcase behind you. I can tell when you see me because you lift your hand to wave, and you looks so alone and so beautiful that something breaks inside me because suddenly I’m running towards you and in the back of my mind I’m thinking that security probably doesn’t like running that much, but I don’t care because now you’re running too, and when we reach each other you wrap your arms around my waist and half collapse into me, burying your head in my shoulder. I throw my arms around you just as fiercely and we stay like that, clinging to each other, until you stop shaking and almost everyone else from your flight is long gone.

 ---

This time, we’ve managed to secure a place in the corner of the café, away from the usual mild chaos that happens in the early afternoon. You have a large ring binder open in front of you, and I have a book on my lap, although we’re both not paying any attention to either of them.

“I just keep thinking that if I had done something else he could have made it,” you tell me. I nod.

“Same. I mean, I could have come with you on the trip. I’m heatproof, I would have been fine. I could have helped.”

You sigh, then say, “There was no reason for you to come along. And besides, the smoke is the actual problem, not the fire.”

“And you can’t change whether someone goes bright. It’s not your fault,” I reply. You don’t say anything for a while, then you ask me to pass you the tea. I do, accidentally spilling some on my hand in the process.

You smile while handing me a napkin, and say, “Clumsy much, sands?”

A small area on my right arm immediately goes numb, and then there’s the same sensation as when you put your hands under freezing water and for a moment you can’t tell whether it’s hot or cold. I stop moving completely for a second, then sink back in my chair in a way that I hope looks casual. You give me a questioning look that I pretend I don’t see.

“That’s a new nickname, is it?” I ask. You look at me strangely, so I continue, “I don’t think I’ve heard it before, is all. And, you hadn’t come up with any new ones in a while, I was wondering if you had run out of creativity.”

“Hey, you know I’ll never run out of nicknames for you, dumbass.”

“I like that one less than the others,” I comment.

You throw your napkin at me and call me an idiot, and I think ‘I love you’, but instead I ask you if you’re talking about yourself. You laugh and I think you laughing is the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen, except then you make a silly face and I think the same thing about that too, so maybe I’m just a little biased. Even before my mark burned, I couldn’t imagine loving anyone but you like this, and maybe one day I’ll tell you that, but for now I cross my legs and sit back and watch as you blow a strand of hair out of your face, and I think, god, you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I start to hurt a little less.

 ---

When I get home, I stand in front of my mirror, staring at the bold print on my arm and think about how your voice sounded saying it. Then, I call my sister, and scream into the phone and she asks what’s going on and if I’m ok and when I tell her what happened, she screams back. I had always hoped it would be you, but you call people nicknames with the reckless abandon of someone who’s already found their soulmark, or who has no soulmark at all, and I had assumed I would never get that particular wish of mine. There’s nothing for sure saying I have to be your mark as well, but its more likely than not, and when I remind my sister of this, I tell her that I expect nothing, that I’m happy enough with having you as my mark, because that’s true. She calls me an idiot and says that there’s no way I’m not your soulmark, and in that moment, I believe her.

 ---

I can hear the pounding of music from inside the building as I stand waiting in line, and I wonder how you managed to talk me into this. Both of us would prefer to stay home and watch a movie or play a board game together than to go out for the night, drinking and clubbing. Nevertheless, here we are. Your hair is drawn up in a ponytail that falls over one shoulder, and I want to lean forward and push a stray strand of hair out of your face but I don’t.  

We stand for a while, waiting and chatting, although there are slightly awkward silences where comfort usually lies. Eventually, the line shifts forward and we enter the club. My eyes take a moment to adjust to the dark of the room, and when I look over, you gesture to the bar before starting to make your way towards it through the crowd. I follow you, and you buy us both a drink which I hold because I don’t want to be rude, but I don’t drink anything from it. You lean back against the bar, and my eyes catch on the curve of your shoulder. I see your jaw clench as a light flashed over us.

A pretty girl comes up to you and you buy her a drink. She has dark hair and glitter around her eyes. Her hand curls around your forearm. I turn to look into the crush of people and wonder how long I have to stay. You tap my arm. When I look over, you gesture to the dancefloor and then the girl, and send me a questioning look. I nod, so you grab her hand to pull her into the crowd. I tilt my head back and take a big drink of whatever it is that you bought me, then try to convince myself the burning behind my eyes is from the alcohol.

The sign for the toilet is a burning light compared to the rest of the building. Inside, there’s a group of drunk people laughing, and one girl is leaning heavily against the person she’s with, makeup brush in hand. In one bathroom stall, a man hold back the hair of someone making horrific sounds in the general direction of the toilet bowl. I stumble into another stall and lock the door. I see you, pressed against her, and then you with her hand on your waist. You bring your hand up to tangle in her hair and she presses even closer to you. I shake my head and instead imagine your legs draped across my lap and your arms around my neck but then it’s you and her with your lips on her neck and her fingers on the small of your back. I put my hand on the word etched into my arm, and think about how you must not have a matching one. A smile is on your face as she presses her lips to yours. I feel a salty dampness on my cheek.

Suddenly, the sounds from outside get louder again, and then a door slams and everything goes back to muffled dullness. There’s something familiar, although for a second I don’t realise what, until it registers that I’m hearing my own name. I unlock the stall door and push it open to see you. You’re shaking and there’s black tear marks down your face.

“Can we go?” you ask. I reach out as if to touch your cheek, but then stop myself.

“The lights are scaring me. They keep landing on people and- can we go?” you repeat. I must have nodded, because next thing I know we’re in a taxi. You’re staring out of the window at the passing buildings. Your hair is mussed, but not terribly, and one of your dress straps has slipped off one shoulder. There’s a small collection of glitter next to one eye.

The taxi stops, and you get out and walk to the door of my flat in a daze, so I pay the fare and thank the driver. I unlock the door, and we wander into the kitchen, scattering shoes and bags around the flat as we go.

 ---

Neither of us drank much, and so after some burnt popcorn and several mugs of hot chocolate, we begin to return to normal. You’re sat on my kitchen counter with your legs crossed in front of you, so I climb up too and pull my knees up to my chest.

“Would you feel it,” you ask into the silence, “if someone did say it?”

I think I know what you’re talking about, but I send you a questioning look anyway. My heart begins to beat faster in my chest.

“I mean, you’re burn proof, right? What if it didn’t burn you?” You look devastated, although I don’t know why. I sigh.

“I think it wouldn’t matter. I’m not going to fall for someone just because of a name. I want to care about a person, not a tradition.”

If anything, you look even closer to tears.

“BUT,” you say, and I wince at the volume even though you’re probably more sensitive to loud noises than me at the moment, so you apologise before continuing.

“But,” you repeat, “what happens if you like a person but you don’t feel it burn?”

There’s a long silence before I say, “It burned.”

“Oh.”

I’m looking anywhere but your face, and in the corner of my eye I can see you doing the same.

“Who-“

“Please don’t ask me that,” I interrupt.

I can hear you sniffing softly, but I don’t know what to do so I just press my leg ever so slightly against yours.

“Mine is you, you know,” you tell me, and the whole world stops turning. “I didn’t want to tell you for the longest time because-“

I interrupt again. “Are you drunk still? At all?”

“No. Although I have no idea why I’m saying this sober.”

“Good.” I take a deep breath. My heart has decided to learn how to tap-dance. I lean closer to you and now I can see the faintest of freckles strewn across your nose. You’re perfectly still, and for a forever second, everything in the world stops.

“Are you drunk?” you breath. I can feel the words on my skin.

“Not even slightly.” Then I kiss you.

Everything about you is soft, and I put my hand on your waist because I want to. There’s a weight on my shoulders and I fee your arms wrap around my neck.

Eventually, I have to pull away because I’ve bent over myself to get to you, and my leg is numb. You let out a small laugh, and then I pull my sleeve up to show you my mark and you do the same. I shift my legs and you pull me back in again.

[scabbursarchive]

you know I can't choose just ONE this is veronarchie we're talking about!! Voice, Beg, Check-In :)

[ Send me a word & a ship and I’ll write a drabble or starter about… ]

becca….. rebecca………. beccothy………………..first of all one of these was the smutiest things i’ve probably ever attempted to ever write and the other two were a mess but everything is Long because i had a lot of feels and sO…… i am sorry.

VOICE

[ DID I BASE THIS PROMPT OFF OF THIS????? SURE DID!!!! ]

what’re you wearing?

well, i’m not wearing any underwear. ;)

because you never put the fucking laundry into the fucking dryer like i asked you to 100 fucking times

call me and i’ll make it up to you

please?

Archie watched as text bubbles blinked across the lower left of the screen before stopping, and finally her contact photo with her and Mia at a hockey game crossed the screen. He wasted no time in accepting the call, knowing she could practically hear his fucking grin over the telephone.

“You’re an idiot.”

“But you love me. Seriously, though. What’re you wearing?”

He could hear her sigh at the other end of the line. “What do you want me to say? Nothing but your jersey?” her voice teased deeply before he heard her soft snort.

Archie laughed as he settled back against his hotel bed, his gaze turning up towards the ceiling as he imagined her in their bedroom back home. “No, because I don’t want some dumb fantasy. I just want you. Which dorky pajamas are you wearing? The ones with the sushi rolls?” he continued to tease, resting his hand on his abs.

“Fuck you, they’re comfy. And I’m wearing the sushi shorts, but I do have one of your shirts on, too. The Naperville Soccer League shirt with the hole in the armpit. Super dorky.”

“Mmmm, okay. Now this I can picture. Lose my shirt, I’ll wash it when I get back.”

“You’re not going to wash shit, Payne. You’ll toss your suitcase in the closet until you forget about it and then you’ll complain that you don’t have anything to wear.”

“Well I always have said we should adopt a no clothing policy in the home.”

“Yeah, that’ll blow over well with your 9 year old daughter.”

“Spitzke,” Archie groaned out a laugh, rolling his eyes. He might have put a ring on her finger just a few months back, but the old surname rivalry would always stick with the two of them. “Can you please stop talking about Mia and my laundry and just stick your fucking hand down your ugly shorts?”

——————-

BEG

Veronica tugged sharply at the short strands of hair on Archie’s head, the move practically causing tears to form in his eyes as he hissed against her nether lips. He shot a sharp glare up at her from where he lay between her thighs, though Veronica was wholly unaware of the look; her head tossed back against her pillows, dark hair surrounding her, sheens of sweat covering her heaving chest. Archie moved his hand from where it had been wrapped around her thigh and moved it up her body to give one of her nipples a sharp twist and a pinch in retaliation for taking his hair out. The move only seemed to spur her on more.

She held onto his head tightly, attempting to anchor his head just right as her hips ground up desperately against his face. He could feel how close she was in the way her body trembled against him; he could hear how close she was by the way her breath grew ragged and her moans grew louder; he could fucking taste how close she was. His tongue moved up from her dripping entrance to circle her clit before he wrapped his lips around it, and her thrusting seized as her body clenched in concentration, just a few seconds longer, and…

Archie pulled away just before she could come apart, his lips moving instead to kiss and nip at her inner thigh while he waited for her to catch her breath.They’d been at this for what felt like hours. Well, for Veronica, maybe. Archie loved nothing more than to tease his girl senseless, and what better way to spend an evening than between her thighs?

Veronica was growing more desperate by the second. And really fucking angry. He hid his smirk by placing a sharp hickey to her thigh, but she slapped his head away, her eyes like fire as she met his juvenile gaze.

“Fuck you, Archibald. Fuck. You. Go away,  I can finish it myself, you stupid piece of shit. Asshole.” She ranted and raved; continued to try and push his head away, her heels kicking against his back before her free hand moved between her legs, her fingers circling her clit and —

“Ah ah ah,” Archie quickly wrapped both of his hands around both of her wrists, overpowering her hits and folding her arms over her stomach, pinning them there as he shot her with another glare, now that she could see him. 

He knew she was desperate to cum. He’d been hard from the moment he tossed her on the bed and fell between her thighs with the promise in his eyes to make it worth her while. Every shift against the sheets caused his cock to twitch painfully in his boxers, but he was still bound and determined for one thing:

He wanted to hear her beg.

Veronica had always been quite vocal in bed. If he could record the sounds of her moans, he thinks he’d gladly make it his alarm every single morning. She was loud and it was one of his most favorite things (on top of everything else about her, but still). But hearing her so desperate that  she literally begged for him? It was at the very tip top of his list.

“Veronica,” he whispered, his lips brushing ever so softly against her clit, his eyes glinting as his breath hit her nether lips. “Ask me nicely…” His hands gripped her wrists tighter before his lips descended back to her pussy once more, avoiding her clit as he softly licked a single stripe up her entrance. “That’s all I want.” He didn’t have to look up to know that she was wild with fury and a deep seated need to release herself in the pleasure that Archie was refusing to give her, but he knew she understood just what he wanted. He chanced his luck releasing one of her wrists to drag his hand back down, over her thigh, through her wetness, continuing to avoid her clit and instead sticking a finger inside her dripping heat. He curled his finger up, dragging slowly against her walls. Her thighs tightened where they splayed over his shoulders and he heard her sharp inhale at the move, but she otherwise remained stubbornly silent.

That was, until he surprised her with a second finger the same time his lips curled back around her clit, sucking relentlessly before slowing down, letting his tongue languidly circle the bundle of nerves. She’d been on edge for awhile now, and building her back up to that sharp peak took barely any work at all. But there was only one way he’d let her get what she wanted (and by default, what he needed as well). “Veronica,” he repeated her name breathlessly, almost positive that the manic look on her face mirrored his own need for release.

And maybe that’s what it took for the dam to finally break. “Please!” Veronica yelped, her free hand moving to grip the sheets tightly, learning her lesson although nothing could stop her hips from desperately moving against his face. She let out a short, sharp, throaty scream when she rubbed herself right up against his stubble, and the accidental brush had only made her more wild. “Fuck. Please, Archie. Pleasepleaseplease pl-please. I want… Need, baby, please.”

If Archie was a stronger person, he’d probably have it in him to ask her to tell him in detail just what she was begging for. But as it was, Archie simply dropped her other wrist, held onto her thigh for dear life as she bucked up against his face… Just as he dragged his chin back over her clit, he added a third finger to piston inside of her and his lips found her bundle once more, another loud smack of his lips as he sucked, and…

Veronica’s back arched up off the bed, her mouth open in a silent scream. Meanwhile, her thighs were trembling over his shoulders while her insides tightly squeezed his fingers and he practically shuddered at the thought of how good it would feel when he was finally inside of her. Her release was fucking gorgeous, she was fucking gorgeous, not regretting for a second just how bad he had to tease her in order to witness this moment. His fingers slowed and his thumb put a circular pressure on her nub to help her come down from her orgasm, his lips kissing over her thighs and up her stomach as he dragged himself up her body by way of his mouth.

Archie fucking loved it when she begged for him.

———————–

CHECK-IN

Their dinner date had started out innocent enough. Archie had managed to sway the manager of Chicago’s latest and greatest high-rise dining at a new hotel overlooking the lake for a 6 o'clock reservation on a Saturday night only a week in advance, and after seeing Veronica in her black, backless dress… Well, the hefty deposit to get a reservation so late was turning out to be well worth it.

Despite the tightness of his chest (among other extremities) when he picked her up around 4 and made their way downtown, it really truly all was very innocent. Getting Veronica to go on an actual date with him had been like pulling teeth (who could blame her?), but the two of them were actually pretty good at it. They still argued, a lot, about literally everything but their common interests and dumbass family made conversation flow in and out of their teasing and bickering effortlessly. Veronica held his hand in hers while she animatedly talked about all of the clients at work that she couldn’t stand (it was all of them) and Archie pulled his phone out to show her all of the cheesy photos he’d taken of Mia at soccer practice (and how he so wasn’t biased but Mia was the best kid on the team).

Conversation was so easy, one bottle of wine turned to two, and even long after they’d finished their dessert, night long since fallen, the skyline reflecting beautifully off of Lake Michigan but Archie only had eyes for the fiery brunette who was glowing in the soft candlelight across from him.

Conversation stilled as Archie paid the check. The duo made their way out of the restaurant while Archie took full advantage of the open back of her dress, his hand softly resting at her lower back to guide her, but he was man enough to admit that it was mostly his innate need to be touching her.

The restaurant had been at the very top of the hotel, and just as Veronica reached out to touch the down button for the elevator, Archie reached out to grip her wrist, tugging her into a tiny alcove off to the corner where there was nothing but a utility closet and some tropical, leafy plant. Trapping her between his hands as he pushed her back to the wall, blocking her from view of anyone who passed, he let his fervent gaze trail over her now that they weren’t separated by a whole table and 30 other random onlookers just trying to eat their dinner. Archie licked his lower lip as his eyes settled on her own wine stained lips, and he leaned forward to close the space between them, needing to steal a quick kiss.

“I mentioned already how beautiful you look, yeah?” he kissed her once more before his lips moved down over her chin, to the crook of her neck as he inhaled her scent; his favorite scent. He felt her chuckle against him, her hand running up his torso, up and around his neck.

“Might have mentioned it once or twice. Not getting tired of hearing it, though.”

He grinned boyishly against her skin before pulling away to meet her captivating gaze, practically suffocating himself with the need to be with her just a little bit longer — before work and life and family and Mia butted back in. Archie loved his life but he was starting to come to terms with just how much he loved Veronica, too.

“You know, we did polish off two bottles and with Saturday night traffic it’s probably best we don’t risk the ticket…” One hand dropped from the wall to run down her side, over the soft, silky material of her dress. The tips of his fingers touched the skin of her back like fire as his graze trailed lower and his hand finally encompassed her back, tugging her body to his, knowing she would probably immediately feel his need for her. Let her call him out for it. “We’re already at a hotel, plenty of beds to sleep it off…”

He’d wanted to drag her back to his place and peel that fucking dress off just to see what kind of underwear she was wearing (he had been very aware from the moment she stepped out the door that she was braless), but Archibald Payne would never go down in history for having any Self Control when it came to Veronica Spitzke. The drive back to Naperville felt far too fucking long.

Before he could even get an answer out of her, Veronica was biting her lower lip between her teeth to hold back her grin, taking his hand in hers and dragging him back to the elevators, reaching out to push the button for one of them rather impatiently. It had been close by, and Archie had been rather thankful for having the elevator to themselves so he could continue to kiss her all the way back down to the lobby for check-in, but before he could pull her back against him, Veronica had her hands pressed to his chest, shoving him indignantly into the corner of the elevator, underneath the security camera, reaching out to grab the emergency stop. She fell against him with the inertia of the quick stop, and Archie’s arms came around to catch her. “Jesus, Veronica, you-”

Archie didn’t know how his pants could come undone so quickly, but she had his zipper yanked down and her hand in his pants before he could even get his words out.

His head fell back against the wall, her grip around his dick causing his vision to go a little blurry but his attention perked right back up when she fell to her knees in front of him, taking his pants down right along with her. Her gaze was teasing as she looked up at him, giving him a couple jerks, feeling himself grow harder in her pliant hands. “Let me take care of this for you first,” she licked up the underside of his cock, a challenge in her fiery gaze as her lips surrounded his head and slowly pulled away with a wet pop. “I don’t want the lady at the front desk to get the wrong impression of us.”

[dementedgnomicwizard]

richie as things ive done

-maxed out my phone storage because i saved too many pictures of flags after deciding that i was going to text exclusively in semaphore

-walked up a 2-story railing because i was bored and then did it again because the first time my friend didnt get pictures

-crawled underneath a train because i dropped my flip flop

-spent too much money on thrift store knick knacks with cursed energy (puppets, garden gnomes, ceramic figurines, other peoples’ family photos, etc)

-spent too much money on awful thrift store clothes

-made a valiant attempt to bring silly bandz back

-ate over 100 rolls of smarties in a 48-hour period

-ignored the fact that i had the flu or something for a week. just genuinely did not realize until someone pointed it out

-locked myself in a school bathroom stall with my friends so i could draw sunglasses on her nipples with expo marker

-got in trouble for holding a baby doll like a real baby in english class

-filled said baby with chocolate milk and barbecue sauce “to feed it” and punted it across the bathroom

-bought my friend a custom life-sized body pillow of her fav actor for her birthday and hid it in her locker for a terrifying morning surprise

-bought a ball gag at goodwill

-gave a chemistry presentation to my entire class and forgot to remove the slide with a picture of a frog with a speech bubble that said “hnnng… i need… your spit”

-ate a lock of wig hair for a video that we were filming

-accidentally yelled “FUCK” in french class as soon as the room had gone silent

-kept loose cheese puffs in my desk drawer

-kept a dixie cup of chocolate chips in my desk drawer

-accidentally came into possession of 78 decorative gourds and didnt know where to put them so i left them in the top of my locker and they rotted

-got in trouble in sixth grade on valentines day for giving a boy a small potato instead of a paper valentine

-tried to wriggle my body through a saint patrick’s day wreath at a thrift store and got very, very, very stuck

-was the ringbearer for a wedding and said “oh, swag” on reflex when i dropped the rings

-challenged myself to write all my in-class essays so that they could be read to the tune of ‘two trucks’ and no one ever found out

-brought pot brownies to an anime convention

-stayed up for days on end until i was so tired that i fell asleep while writing an in-class essay and kept writing gibberish while fully asleep

-got an a in a class where i literally never turned in the homework

-changed my text tone to an audio recording of my best friend saying something embarrassing

-went through a phase where i would write several pages of notes on one page in different colors until it looked like just horrible scribbles “to save paper”

-bought parchment and a quill pen on amazon and used them to take notes

-had to leave a party early but i was eating fishsticks and i wasnt done so i put them all in my coat pocket

-kept loose dumplings in my hoodie pocket

-wore a fanny pack with a speaker in it and blasted ‘two trucks’ and also used the fanny pack to carry a bag of gummi worms and give them to people when they were upset that i called ‘emotional support worms’

-bought a whole-ass rocking horse and then took it home on the bus

-drank monster energy out of my parents’ wedding-gift wine glasses

-babysat some kids and helped them turn the entire first floor of their house into a fort for a brutal nerf gun war

-started a black market in third grade where the primary trade was colored pencils and cap erasers

-made direct eye contact with my teacher and said ‘because i am a dumbass’ when asked why i didnt have the homework

-went to a burger place where the workers yell out the order numbers and when they yelled “69!” muscle memory took over and i yelled back “NICE”

-tried to convince my friend to chug a glass of dairy free creamer until i got tired of waiting and grabbed it out of her hands and chugged it myself

-bought an animatronic bear at a thrift store and spent an hour trying to pry open the battery case to discover that it sings When I’m 64. like the whole song all the way through

-got lost in best buy for two hours and ended up leaving with a Dory backpack that was on sale

-kept a headless antique mannequin in my room at the foot of my bed to train myself out of feeling fear

-in fifth grade i attempted to physically fight another fifth grader over our minecraft fanfiction

-skipped swimming class for an entire trimester and somehow faced no repercussions

-stole a girl’s hair out of her hairbrush in fourth grade and used it for crafts

-pinned my friend to the floor and rubbed a gluestick on her face i don’t remember why

-got my friends to pool all our money at sky high so we could put cotton eyed joe into the jukebox as many times as possible

-started an uprising against our lunchtime therapist in fourth grade by convincing all of my friends to make warriors ocs with me instead of participating in the activities (this culminated in the four of us getting kicked out of lunchtime therapy)

-made my first friend in high school because she saw me secretly eating twizzlers out of my sleeve in english class

-found loose jelly beans in my school bag and ate them without question

[deansmom]

ways adhd is constantly low key ruining my life:

I literally forget to eat if I am alone. I will literally forget to feed myself because unless I get up that exact second my stomach is like “hey dumbass you’re hungry” I will forget that I was hungry in the first place.

I literally forget to go to sleep. I try to stop myself now because I KNOW what happens when I do this, every time, but a lot of youtubers upload their videos late at night/early in the morning so my dumb ass forgets to fall asleep because I watched ONE safiya video and then youtube recommended me a buzzfeed video and then a liza koshy video and then a jenna marbles video and then I look at the clock on my laptop and holy fuck it’s 2:30 and I need an hour to actually go to sleep oh my god I’m not going to sleep until 3:30 I have to get up at seven fuck I’m so stupid how am I going to get through work tomorrow god what the fuck

if I start to do something, like I actually get the motivation and the energy to do something like clean illyria’s tank or do laundry, I cannot stop in the middle or I will never finish it. I clean my room, like actually clean it (put clothes away, do laundry, change my sheets, pick up the trash, pick up the accumulated shit that’s all around my room from months of being lived in, etc), once every MAYBE four months because it takes me like 8 hours to clean it until I’m satisfied. I’ve literally slept just on the allergen cover on my bed for a week because I got interrupted when I was cleaning my room and I kept forgetting to put sheets on my bed until it was time to go to sleep and at that point in the day, every time, I just didn’t care or have the energy to deal with it. so my friend ended up making my bed because he hated how the allergen cover feels. 

it takes me an hour to actually fall asleep because I can’t turn my brain off so if I go upstairs at 12:30, I know I’m not falling asleep until 1:30 whether I like it or not. and I usually just take one too many melatonin because I have to work tomorrow and I fucking need sleep like holy shit.

I had a really good point for this next one and I completely forgot what it was

OH OH OH time! my concept of time is skewed because if I’m engaged in something (watching youtube videos or typing a post like this for example because like, holy shit it’s 12:26 I need to go to bed), I don’t notice the time passing at all. I have literally accidentally stayed in bed for three hours because I was watching videos on my phone and I would’ve bet you $100 that it had only been twenty minutes. but when I’m bored and my brain has nothing to engage in, five minutes feels like fifty minutes and I start spiraling because it’s like if my brain doesn’t have anything to eat (ie focus on) it just starts eating itself (ie spiraling)

I’m always tired because my brain is literally always going so I’m not physically tired, like I feel physically okay, I could probably hike up a (small) mountain, sure - but my brain is like, done for the day by 3:30. and it’s a fucking JOKE because I’m not a fully functional person until about 3-4 hours after I wake up and I take my medicine within the first 45 minutes of being awake and it’s most effective for about eight hours so there’s literally like maybe three hours that you can catch me during the day where I have my shit together.

I almost got written up at work once because I wasn’t “finishing everything” when I opened. this happened because they found to do lists I wrote myself so I wouldn’t forget to do the things - BUT I FORGOT THE LISTS EXISTED AND FORGOT TO CROSS OUT THE THINGS I DID SO IT LOOKED LIKE EVERY TIME I OPENED THE PREVIOUS TWO WEEKS I FORGOT TO DO REALLY BASIC SHIT LIKE FEED THE BIRDS OR THE FISH OR DO DEAD SWEEP OR FEED THE REPTILES AND I HAD TO AWKWARDLY EXPLAIN LIKE NO, OH MY GOD, THOSE LISTS ARE FOR ME SO I DON’T FORGET TO DO THOSE THINGS. I JUST.......... FORGOT THAT THE LISTS EXISTED AFTER I WROTE THEM

I literally failed the drug test to get my current job because the nurse person who did it wouldn’t listen to me when I told her I take adderall and it would show up on the test so I failed the drug test because I had amphetamines in my system do you understand how AWKwARD that phone call was to a potential employer!!!! DO YOU!!!!!!!!!!

there are at least three books that I have multiple copies of because I never got around to reading the first copy I picked up because I couldn’t focus but I saw it in a store again and was like “[jenna marbles voice] HELL YEAH I WANNA READ THIS BOOK” and then I get home and three months later when I clean my room I find the other two copies of the book and it’s too late to return it so I just?????? never read any of them?

this is terrible but I like, occasionally forget to feed the dogs or take yeezy on a walk because I’m a piece of shit. I’ve never completely forgotten but I’ve definitely remembered at like 2pm and texted my mom “hey wait did you feed the dogs?” and just......... god I suck

the amount of times I have forgotten that I had a class or a make up class since I started training. catch me at the fucking fish wall confused and offended that you’re telling me I fORGOT a class until I realize that I’m a dumbass and I did, in fact, completely forget I had a class

today I was midsentence with a customer and I looked up and one of the koi had something in their mouth and I trailed off in the middle of a word and just blurted out “did that koi eat a piece of gravel” because he was swimming around with half a worm in his mouth and interrupting the lady a few minutes later to tell her when I realized it was a piece of worm and not a piece of gravel and her just looking super disgusted 

tl;dr anxiety makes being a person Hard but adhd makes being a person Impossible

[deadgwen]

IT IS A HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY TO THE BEST GOAT

@fucshias  @jiilys  MY LOVE GOATY. MY MOST BEAUTIFUL GOAT. MY SUN. MY STARS. MY BEAUTIFUL HOOVED CREATURE OF GOD. I HAVE ARRIVED TO SAY SOME IMPORTANT THINGS BUT FIRSTLY I LOVE YOU I LOVE I LOVE YOU U R READING THIS POST RIGHT NOW DUE TO A VERY IMPORTANT REASON AND THIS IMPORTANT REASON IS THAT

*CHOKES BACK TEARS*

IT IS UR BIRTHDAY.

*SCREAMING*

OK OKI DOKI BEFORE I START: I AM NOT ACTUALLY HERE BUT DO NOT BE D I S E N H E AR T E N E D BC I JUST DONT HAVE WIFI BUT I PROMISE U SOMEWHERE OUT THERE I AM SULKING AND FIGHTING A WALL AND ALSO SETTING OFF FIREWORKS BC !!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS UR FUCKING DAY AND IM SORRY I COULD NOT WISH U BUT I LOVE U SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH I AM HERE W/ U IN SPIRIT

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT TURN THE FUCK UP HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY TO MY LOVE HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U UR EXCELLENT AND I LOVE YOU AND ALSO WHAT THE FUCK BINCH HOW ARE U SEVENTEEN TODAY U ASSHOLE (COPYRIGHT U KNOW WHO) WHO ALLOWED U TO BE LIKE THIS AND ALSO I LOVE YOU. AND ALSO I CANT BELIEVE UVE DONE THIS. UR LITERALLY SEVENTEEN TODAY I AM NOT ALRIGHT AND I NEED U TO HOLD ME BECAUSE I AM GOING TO COME OVER AND FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF BEING A DRAMATIC BITCH I WILL FAINT IN UR ARMS I AM 100% NOT ALRIGHT

like,,,, HONESTLY u are so. fucking. great. WHERE DO I EVEN START. 

FIRST AND FOREMOST I WANNA SAY I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED FOR THIS FOR UR BDAY I LOVE YOU GOATY I AM SO PUMPED THAT UR SO OLD ITS RIDICULOUS @ ME FUCK OFF ALRIGHT BUT. JUST. I LOVE I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY U GOAT UR BEYOND INCREDIBLE

UR OFFICIALLY A DANCING QUEEN UR YOUNG AND SWEET. ONLY. *SMASHES OPEN MY WINDOW AT 12 MIDNIGHT* SEVENTEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

SO OH MY GOD. I AM CURRENTLY YELLING BECAUSE??????????? LIKE???????????????? YOU'RE SEVENTEEN??????? HOW DID WE EVEN COME TO THIS POINT ITS INSANE LIKE HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU SEVENTEEN WE'RE ALL JUST STILL TINY SMOLS WHERE ARE U GOING WHY ARE U GROWING OLDER STOP IT PLS ALRITE I DO NOT LIKE. MY PRECIOUS GOAT SUNSHINE WHO IS A PROFESSIONAL PAJAMA CONSULTANT A REAL SOLID BUSINESSWOMAN WHO DRIVES AND SHIT AND COULD PROBABLY RUN ME OVER AND IS 6'3 SO IF U WOULD SIT ON ME I WOULD MOST CERTAINLY DIE UR OFFICIALLY A DANCING QUEEN AND I AM CRYING

but in all seriousness I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU i am FOREVER AND EVER glad that i met u LIKE I FUCKIN HATE U GODMDAN FUCKIBG GOAT MAKING ME REBLOG THIGNS FUCK YUO FUCK O FF but like????? apart from that UR FUCKING BEYOND FABULOUS and i have decided to compile a list of reasons why u are unbelievably great and have earned ur title of being a dancing queen/brilliant goat/actual love of my life. bc u are excellent. AND IT MUST BE WRITTEN OUT HERE SOMEWHERE THAT I LOVE YOU. 

OK OK OK SO HERE WE GO BINCHES. PREPARE URSELF. THIS IS GONNA BE SUPER LENGTHY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU A LOT AND I AM GONNA DO A 'ON THE JELLICOE ROAD' WORTHY REVIEW OF U BUT LIKE A SHITTIER VERSION SO U BETTER FUNKIN BUCKLE UP BITCH

LEZGO:

IS OBVIOSULY FABULOUS

IS A REAL LIFE GIRAFFE 

WE ARE BLESSED TO HAVE ONE ROAM OUT OF CAPTIVITY LIKE............. WE ARE STRONGLY BLESSED

I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH

CLAIMS TO HAVE 'barely any leg but a huge torso' and interpret this how u want bUT i just wanna say u r the most fucked up giraffe ever ok what the fuck WHO HURT YOU

apparently dis binch owns a bunny AND NEVER TOLD ME SHE DID

owns a problematic rabbit bc it pees everywhere

said problematic rabbit likes to pee everywhere so much its ridiculous it has no respect for the value of items of modern society and thus in my opinion should be sent to COURT

@ rabbit U NASTY OK PLS GET UR PRIORITIES SORTED???? THIS HAS BEEN A MOTHERFUCKING PSA THANK U (CAROLINE I AM TRUSTING YOU TO SHOW THIS ON UR PHONE TO THE GODDAMN BUNNY I NEED IT TO KNOW)

is 100% excellent at looking after drunk people ALRITE literally THIS WOMAN IS A SAINT who has saved REAL LIVES tbh where would that poor child from your old intermediate be if u hadn't SAVED HIS ENTIRE LIFE from all that tequila he would DEAD thats fuKCIN RIGHT U DESERVE ALL THE MEDALS A TRUE HERO AMONG NEW ZEALANDERS. A NATIONAL ICON. SO BRAVE I AM SO PROUD I LOVE YOU ALWAYS

AND ALSO PULLING DRUNK MAKING OUT PEOPLE OFF EACH OTHER I JUST WANT U TO KNOW THAT UR EFFORTS ARE SO VERY RECOGNIZED BECAUSE ONE TIME I DID THAT AND I GOT PUNCHED IN THE THROAT I THOUGHT I DIED BECAUSE I SAW JESUS BUT IT WASNT ACTUALLY JESUS IT WAS JUST A POSTER TAPED TO A FRIDGE I WAS SCAMMED

her own mum has called the police on her and was 100% ready for some quality fun family jailtime

ALSO ONE TIME GOATY ACCIDENTALLY FUCKED UP SOMEONES REAR MIRROR AND THE VICTIMS OF THE INCIDENT DID NOT GIVE HALF A FUCK HOWEVER, HER MOTHER GOATY REPORTED SEVERAL FUCKS TO THE POLICE AND FILED AN ACCIDENT REPORT AND THAT WAS THE DAY MY GOATY BECAME A DARK CRIMINAL

*OMINOUS MUSIC*

I AM STILL WAITING FOR THE DAY I WALK MY BUTT INTO COURT AGAINST UR MUM COVERED HEAD TO ASS IN $3 PLASTIC BRACELETS BACKED BY UR UNEXPECTEDLY KLEPTOMANIAC SISTER AND A BASKET OF STOLEN WOMANS DAYS AND ALONG WITH BLING BLING JIMMY WE WILL RESTORE THE RIGHTEOUSNESS AND LACK OF CONSCIENCE ON THIS LOVELY EARTH

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ENOUGHT ABOUT UR MUM LIKE ACTUALLY ALL UR FAMILY MEMBERS ARE DIFFERENT LEVELS OF WILD AND..... I AM AFRAID

OK OK IT MUST BE SAID CAROLINE HAS THE MOST AMAIZNG VOICE ????? EVER

like i love her voice sm SO FUCKING MUCH I TELL U i have never heard anything like it and i want caroline to like read me books for hours AND HOURS AND NARRATE MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE because i love how unusually deep and shadowy her voice sounds like deep flowing river water or smth like i LOVE IT SO MUCH it. Is.So. Strange BUT I LOVE IT IT IS THE COOLEST GODDAMN THING THROW A BUCKET AT ME I LOVE YOU

HAS A VIDEO OF HERSELF DOING THE ICE BUCKET CHALLENGE AND I KNOW I HAVE PRAISED IT FOR TWO YEARS IN A ROW ALREADY LIKE @ ME PLZ CHILL BUT i will not i will NEVER it is solid entertainment a+++ QUALITY I AM LAUGHIGN IM LAUGHING I AM LAUGHING FOREVER those beautiful hops of pain across ur backyard ARE THE LAST THINGS I WANT TO SEE BEFORE GOD TAKES ME FROM THIS EARTH

WRONGFULLY FRAMED ME FOR HAVING SHIT DICK TENDENCIES AND THEN YELLED AT ME AND CALLED ME A GARAGE WHAT A BINCH I AM IN LOVE

loves yellow flowers AND ALL THE FLOWERS AND HEAVY ROSES AND IS A FULL OUT FLOWER HOE

IS DESPICABLE TEEN WOLF GARBAGE LIKE.... ive been scrolling through our fanmails AND MY HEART HUR T S G O A T Y hOld mE we were sO Y O U N  G and like no lie i shit u not 80% oF THE FUCKING MESSAGES ARE U YELLING 'STYDIA IS GONNA HAPPEN THIS SEASON' AND 'OH MY GOD DID U SEE THAT STYDIA SCENE' AND DECLARATIONS OF LOVE FOR LYDIA MARTIN AND THE OTHER 20% IS U ASKIN ME IF IVE SEEN THE NEW TEEN WOLF I LOVE IT I LOVE YOU I AM SORRY TEEN WOLF KEEPS DISAPPOINTING US BOTH BUT STDYIA IS. DEFINIETELY. GONNA. HAPPEN. THIS. SEASON. IT HAS TO OR I WILL FUKIN FITE ALRIGHT GIVE US STYDIA OR GIVE US DEATH I LOVE UR TEEN WOLF LOVIBG ASS

anyway caroline is an utterly excellent person

if u were an ncea paper i would grade u with excellence

*FINGER GUNS*

like ?????deals with my stupid yelling ALL THE TIME

whenever i had a problem and went to my goaty she was so very understanding and patient AND DID NOT CALL ME A DUMBASS WHEN I DESERVED TO BE DECKED

TOLD ME THE TRU DEFINTION OF THE PHRASE 'SHOT'

TWO YEARS OF UTTER CONFUSION. ERASED FROM MY LIFE. PERMANENTLY.

MY SKIN?? CLEARED . MY FUTURE BILLS ??? PAID MY HUSBAND MARRIED MY STATUE FOR CAROLINE FULLY ERECTED

ok but like i can never say this enough goaty IS SO NICE TO TALK TO PLETAHE TALK TO ME FORVER SHE IS FABULOUS??? it blows my mind constantly that someone this incredible and special walks along this earth NONE OF US DESERVE THE GOAT

also ???? WHAT IN THE FUCK HOW HAVE I NOT MENTIONED THIS YET CAROLINE IS THE BEST WRITER I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE SHE IS SO TALENTED EVERY TIME I READ ONE OF HER FICS I END UP THINKING ABOUT IT AFTERWARDS FOR 958495894 YEARS ALRIGHT THEY FUCK ME UP THEY WAY SHE HANDLES WORDS FUCKS ME UP HOW CAN YOUT TAKE FUCKING LETTERS AND THEN SHOVE THEM UP MY ASS LIKE THIS I AM NOT ALRIGHT I AM NOT ALRIGHT I AM NOT ALRIGHT I am Not Strong Enough For This

i am not even kidding ok THE WAY U HANDLE WORDS IS IN.FUCKING.CREDIBLE whenever u use them its like?? u turned them into something precious and all your writing have this feel to it like as if im holding a delicate bouqet of a thousand yellow flowers like im holding a butterfly in my hands like im holding a box of eggs and i am scared shitless to drop it bC MY DAD WILL PERSONALLY CRUCIFY ME

I AM AWFUL AT DESCRIPTIONS BUT I HOPE U SEE WHAT I MEAN. LIKE. IT IS SO *SCREAMS* MINBLOWING DECK ME WITH ALL UR WORDS EVER

I AM ONE HUNDRED FUCKING PERCENT NEVER OKAY WITH ANYTHING YOU WRITE IT HURTS SO GOOD AND I LOVE IT

ok ok this hoe right here has written THREE fics with a dedication for me at the beginning and like.............. ..... do u ever just cri

i have 'the glorious everywhere' printed out and FUCKING PINNED TO MY WALL WHERE I CAN SEE IT FROM ALL CORNERS OF MY ROOM ALWAYS back in my apartment in russia like it is legitimately the best thing. i love everything about this piece it should be adapted into a novel or a short film like PULL SOME FIFTY SHADES OF GREY SHIT W/ IT OK the imagery and REALNESS of this fic gets to me all the time and im crying im crying im crying I ABSOLUTELY ADORE IT PLS @ CAROLINE WHY ARE U SO TALENT

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT LOOK AT THIS BULLSHIT FUCKIG I THINK ABOUT THIS FIC EVERY SINGLE DAY WHEN I WAKE UP FUCKING LOOK ' You see her hair dripping down her head and spinning out over the seats in the back and lighting them on fire. You see her pale skin and electric veins as she puts her hand out the window and tries to catch the sky and stuff it up her sleeve. You hear her voice, “Just drive James, you’ll know where we’re going when we get there.”  

REALLY I AM NOT FUCKIGN Okay CALL AN AMBULANCE CALL IT NOW I AM UNWELL I AM SICK I AM DYING FUK ME RITE UP

i am fully convinced this is the greatest thing thats ever been written.like. How. the. FUCK. tbh i want this paragraph ENTIRELY TATTOOED ON MY ASS I AM ZCRYING @ CAROLINE YOU HAVE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BRAIN AND I AM SO VERY GLAD THAT IT EXISTS

i will not go into depth abt yelling about ur fics bc tbh i think u Know but I JUST WANNA SAY 'oh darling i have coloured blood (that i stole from you)' is the most iconic piece of literature to this day ever the and i zcri all the time because you are a goddamn bloody genius and you shine in colours beyond my comprehension and i love you so so so incredibly much

MY LOVE IS SO FUCKING TALENTED I AM YELLING I AM YELLING I AM YELLING

DOESN'T EAT FRIED SPERM

writes the BEST emails in history

UR SO LOVELY U GIVE ME SO MANY BEAUTIFUL SPELLING ERRORS FOR ME TO WHOLEHEARTEDLY ENJOY I AM GIGGLING *GIGGLES* IT BRINGS ME SO MUCH JOY WHEN U FUCK THINGS UP

tbh it is how fried chair came to life like it was actually in one of your first fanmails to me u said that two years ago and to this day it remains the Most Iconic Thing Ever

STRONG SUPPORTER OF WEETBIX

LOVES WEETBIX

FOUGHT TIGERS AND LIONS FOR HER FAMILY AND WAS SAVED BY WEETBIX AND WEETBIX ALONE 

ACTUALLY HAD A THING CALLED ‘WEETBIX DISCOURSE’ ON HER BLOG LIKE IT WAS ACTUALLY A THING THAT HAPPENED A REAL THING THAT OCCURED AND WAS PASSIONATELY ARGUED ABOUT AND I HAVE SEEN THINGS THAT CANNOT BE UNSEEN

RIGHTFULLY SO BC WEETBIX >>>>> JONAH GRIGGS I AM SORRY IT IS THE RULES

FUCK THE H8RS

like ??? is hilarious af QUEEN OF HUMOUR AND MAKING ME SNORT MY GODDAMN CHOCLATE MILK LIKE CAN U NOT BE SO EXCEPTIONAL U HO HAVE SOME CONSIDERATION U LIL BITCH but YES a++ top notch QUALITY storytelling skills in both fic writing and tequila struggles I APPRECIATE IT TO DEATH

ok ok ok also the most beautiful person ever??? LIKE ???????????????? BITCH WHAT THE FUCK ??????????????????????????????????????????????? WHO ALLOWED U

THE MOST PERFECT HAIR. ur hair is like waves of a golden ocean cascading from ur hEAD AND IT IS SO MAGICALLY FITTING B/C U R AN ETHEREAL BEING AND THE FACT THAT U HAVE AN ENTIRE WILD SEA RAGING ON UR HEAD JUST PROVES TO ME THAT U ARE A GOD AMONG MORTALS. UR HAIR IS SO PRETTY OK OK OKAY FUCK ME UP. STRAIGHT UP GORGEOUS. SO SOFT TOO AND SO SHINY AND IT FITS U SO WELL I AM FOREVER SCREAMING

THE MOST ANGEL FACE. GOATYS FACE LOOKS LIKE GOD OR WHOEVER THE FUCK WAS RESPONSIBLE CARVED IT OUT OF ROSE PETALS AND MARBLE LIKE. IT. IS. TRULY. THE MOST GORGEOUS THING ur face is softer than clouds tbh AND UR SMILE SAVES MY LIFE ITS BRIGHTER THAN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE CONDENSED AND SOMETIMES WHEN I SEE UR SELFIES I HAVE TO GO GET LASER EYE SURGERY BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN B L I N D E D

U R SO UNCONSIDERATE TO MY FRAGILE HEALTH HOW DARE YOU

SO. GODDAMN GORGEOUS SLAY MY ENTIRE LIFE I BEG U ID PAY U TO SIT ON ME WITH UR HUGE BONES AND SLOWLY CRUSH ME INTO AN ENDLESS DEATH I HAVE $4 LEFT OVER FROM MY LIFE SAVINGS DO IT BAE

has the best taste in music omg WHAT A BLESSING WE LIKE THE SAME SONGS AND IT ACTUALLY KIND OF SCARES ME B/C IT FEELS LIKE WE ARE THE SAME PERSON AND THIS DOES NOT HELP MY CONSTANT STATE OF EXISTENTIAL CRISIS

HAS THE BEST TASTE IN BOOKS and adores skam as much as i do AND LOVES CHRIS/EVA AS MUCH AS IDO AND WROTE A FIC FOR THEM AND THE SNIPPET FROM IT ????? MY SOUL. GONE.

so tol and will never stop accusing me of being smol but listen up aight. imma FUCK YOU UP. REAL GOOD. ONE DAY. WHEN I CAN AFFORD TO BUY A LADDER. UNTIL THEN SLEEP WITH ONE EYE OPEN BINCH BC I AM COMING TO GET U

and is also the smartiest smart to ever smart LOOK AT MY U GO WITH UR EXCELLENCE ENDORSEMENT when i buy that ladder I WILL CLIMB IT AND HOVER AROUND UR HEAD LOTS SO I CAN ABSORB UR POWERS AND ALSO BREATHE THE FRESH AIR UP THERE WHICH IS NOT AVAILABLE TO GROUNDED PEASANTS SUCH AS ME

AND IS THE BEST COOKIE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE LIKE IF THIS ISNT ENOUGH TO CONVINCE ANYONE THAT CAROLINE IS BEYOND EXCEPTIONAL FOR OUR GALAXY THEN THEY CAN FUCK OFF PLS OK

like honestly,,, MY LOVE I COULD GO ON FOR YEARS AND YEARS AND CENTURIES UNTIL MY TEETH FALL OUT AND I GROW SENILE WITH MY LOVE BUT THE POINT OF THIS HOT STEAMING LAME MESS IS THAT I LOVE YOU TO BLOODY PIECES UR SO F U C K I N G INCREDIBLE I AM SO GLAD I MET YOU AND THAT YOU TAlk TO ME AND WE EMAIL EACH OTHER AND I AM BLESSED THAT YOU EVEN THINK OF ME AND THAT FREID CHAIR LOVES ME AND THAT U R MY GOAT BC UR MY ONLY GOAT AND UR THE BEST ONE THERE IS NO SHADE @ ALL OTHER GOATS BUT LIKE. IM SORRY I CANNOT TELL A LIE

IT IS THE COLD HARD TRUTH. 

and like??? i did a /search/deadgwen ON @jiilys BC I WANTED TO LOOK AT ALL OUR OLD STUFFS FROM 2015 and I Regret it I Regret it So Much theres a selfie from like when i was 14 and an idiot still on Ur blog and I look like an actual tragedy I Want to Die  we have known each other for so long its RIDICULOUS UR STILL AS AMAZING AS U WERE BACK THEN AND I AM MORE OR LESS CURED OF MY CONDITION OF BEING AN EMBARASSING DIPSHIT AND ITS CRAZY HOW MUCH YOUNGER WE WERE THEN LIKE UM WTF BUT UR STILL AS BEAUTIFUL AND 9384930X TIMES MORE AND I STILL LOVE U BC UR PERFECT AS EVER AND THAT IS WHAT MATTERS

NOW. I WAS GONNA MAKE YOU A PRESENT LIKE I REALLY DID BAE I TRIED SO MUCH SHIT ITS HORRIBLE BC LIKE ??? I WANTED TO MAKE YOU A PRESENTATION ON UR GOAT SUPERIORTY LIKE I DID LAST YEAR EXCEPT Like i am a fucking asshole™(COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS THE MAN TEH MYTH THE LEGEND) who cannot do shit FOR SHIT it turned out so Awful and i cANNOT GRAPHIC BABE I TRIED TO MAKE YOU THIS EDIT AND THEN I REALIZED IT WAS Bad AND FOUGHT MYSELF FOR SIX HOURS AND I CANNOT WRITE AND YOU DESERVE ALL THE GIFTS EVER BUT I AM TRULY AWFUL

*ZCRIES*

I KNOW IM  LAME AND MY ONLY TALENT IS YELLING FOR HOURS ON END I WISH I COULD HAVE MADE YOU SOMETHING REALLY COOL BC ITS UR SEVENTEETH AND 17 IS THE BEST NUMBER AND UR LOVELY AND I LOVE YOU SO PLEASE FORGIVE ME BAE FOR BEING AN ACTUAL GARAGE ASSHOLE (COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS THE EXPERIENCE) SHIT DICK 100% TERRIBLE DICKFLUTE OKAY I LOVE YOU AND I CAN NEVER IMAGINE WHAT I WOULD BE WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD YEAR LIKE FUCK SHIT UP BAE UR GONNA BE IN YEAR 13 ITS ALL GONNA BE SO AWFUL AND WE WILL ALL DIE aND WERE SO O L D JESUS CHRIST IF HEART ATTACKS DONT TAKE US OUT NCEA LEVEL 3 WILL BUT I HOPE THIS WILL BE A SUPER GOOD YEAR FOR U IN REGARDS OF EVERYTHING BECAUSE U DESERVE IT U DESERVE IT U DESERVE IT I HOPE THINGS WILL LEAD UP TO U GETTING THAT APARTMENT IN NEW YORK AND ALL THE HIGH HEELS THAT U WILL WEAR AND ALL THE YELLOW FLOWERS THAT U WILL BUY AND UR CAREER AS A LIFECHANGING LITERARY GENIUS OK OK I LOVE YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE

ok ok ok but. 

ONE MORE THING.

LISTEN.

THE FUCKING

*CLECNHES JAW*

REBLOG FIASCO

*FLINGS MY ASS INTO THE SUN*

WHEN IT IS GOOD AND DAYLIGHT. U HAVE UNTIL THEN. LIKE I KNOW THIS IS UR BIRTHDAY WISH AND I LOVE YOU BUT FUCK OFF HWO COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU I FUCKING FUCK JUST FUCK YOU FUCKING DICK i will RIOT 

OKAY BABE ITS MIDNIGHT AND ILL BE UP IN ABOUT SIX HOURS AND LIKE. ANYTHING. ANYTHING ELSE FOR UR BIRTHDAY WISH OK BABE IM GONNA FUCKING DIE THIS IS IT THIS THE END I WILL GO DOWN SWEARING PROFUSELY WITH A HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE AND U WILL BE WATCHING AND LAUGHI G ANF @OFFICALTALL FUCK YU FUCKDUCKUD CUDCKUD DNUSJNDJF FUCK U @GOATY FUCK. UFCN WHERE IS UR HOOF WHY ARE U NOT FEELIN THE TEMPERATURE ITS EBOLA ITS GOATBOLA I WONT MAKE IT UNTIL DAWN I WONT SEE THE SUNLIGHT GOATY I CANT *FAKE CRYING SOUNDS* I WILL DIE. IT WILL HAPPEN. AND I WANT IT TO BE KNOWN THAT U ARE THE BITCH THAT KILLED ME. *MORE FAKE ZCRYING SOUNDS* I MUST SEND MESSAGES TO ALL MY DEAREST KIND FRIENDS WHO HAVE NEVER FUCKED ME LIKE THIS ALRIGHT *FAKE COUGHING* TELL THEM THAT I *MORE FAKE COUGHOGN* LOVE THEM *THROWS KETCHUP PACKET EVERYWHERE WHILE UR NOT LOOKING AND BUSY BEING WORRIED ABOUT MY HEALTH* AND I WILL REMEMBER THEM EVEN IN DEATH

ANYWAY HERE IS MY WILL:

WHAT U GET:

nothing

u get nothing

bINCH

zero. zip. nada

0 potato 4 u

U CAN HAVE THE SALT FROM MY KITCHEN SO U WILL BE PERPETUALLY REMINDED OF MY LAST EMOTIONS TOWARDS THIS LIFE

maybe like the one half a potato that was randomly in my drIVEWAY THAT ONE TIME 

M A Y B E

WHAT GOOD KIND LOVING FRIENDS, SUCH AS MILS AND FRIED CHAIR AND ELLIE AND OTHER ASSORTED PEOPLES WHICH I SHALL ADDRESS IN CLAUSE 4.20 OF THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF MY WILL, GET:

actually mils is a hoe and can choke but u r the evil here rn aND FOR THE PURPOSES OF THIS ARGUMENT WE WILL PRETEND THAT I LIKE MILS

ANYWAY. REALLY GOOD THINGS I OWN

I HAVE SOME SOCKS I DONT WANT U GUYS CAN HAVE THEM

AND LIKE

MY DUVET

SEE GOATY THESE ARE THE KIND OF HEART TOUCHING POST DEATH GIFTS U MISS OUT ON WHEN U MURDER ME IN COLD BLOOD

ALSO NO TOUCHING MY MANGOES THAT I BOUGHT TWO DAYS AGO BECAUSE I STILL WANT TO EAT THEM AND IF ANYONE EVEN BREATHES IN THEIR GENERAL DIRECTION I WILL BEAT THEM UNCONSCIOUS WITH A TELEPHONE THIS IS A T H R E A T

I HOPE UR TAKING NOTES AND I HOPE U FEEL GOOD ABOUT BEING A 6′3 KILLER BECAUSE UR AN ASSHOLE ™LIKE UR ASSHOLIER™ THAN THE REAL ASSHOLE THAT IS JONAH GRIGGS™ THE LABEL™ (COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS™ THE ANT MURDERING HOT PIECE OF ASS™) BUT I WILL DIE FOR U MY GOAT *strokes ur pretty face* BC IT IS UR BIRTHDAY WISH FOR ME TO SUFFER AND I LOVE YOU AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR U THEREFORE . DESPITE THIS SICKNESS *FLAILS* I. WILL. BE. BRAVE. I WILL REBLOG THOSE TWENTY POSTS I WILL FLATLINE BY THE THIRD POST AND MY BLOOD WILL BE ON UR HANDS *CAREFULLY ARRANGES MY STUNT GOAT IN POSITION* AND I WILL BE YELLING CURSES AT YOU IN THE TAGS BUT I WILL DIE IN THE NAME OF HONOUR I WILL GO DOWN AS A GOAT NEVER HAS BEFORE 

BUT LIKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU AND I I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC I AM SO HAPPY U EXIST. HAVE THE BOMBEST ASS 17TH BIRTHDAY BABE I HOPE UR PARTY IS LIT AND HAVE FUN GETTING DRUNK AND HAVING ALL THE BANTS AND LAFFS AND ALSO I WILL SEND U THE AWAITED EMAIL IN A FEW HOURS WHEN MY INTERENT IS BACK ON  BECAUSE IT IS A CONTINUATION OF THIS BULLSHIT WITH SOME STRUCTURED DISCUSSION AKA WHAT THE FUCK DO U HAVE AGAINST SMIRNOFF ICE how is it not HARDCORE enough for u IT IS LITERALLY FLAVOURED VODKA DOES IT NOT KNOCK OUT UR 6′3 ASS OR WHAT EXCUSE ME 

ANYWAY IN CONCLUSION.

HAPPY. SEVENTEENTH. BIRTHDAY. MY. CHUM.

*BLOWS U A KISS*

*PUTS ON TWO FÜR COATS TO REMAIN UNDETECTED* 

*STEALS ALL UR WEETBIX AND RUNS AWAY TO ALASKA NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN*

*still replies ur emails tho cuz i love u bitch y u do dis to me*