#but because if anyone else feels like that just want to say it's not just you

[the-tarot-witch22]

Where and How you will meet your future spouse? - Pick a pile.

Pile 1/Pile2

Pile 3

Hello everyone ! This is my very first pick a pile or pac reading so please be kind and leave comment or reblog, and let me know if it resonated with you!

Note : This is a general reading or collective reading. It may or may not resonate with you. Please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. And it's totally okay if our energies aren't aligned!

How to pick : Take a deep breath and choose a pile which you feel most connected to!

Pile 1:

The cards I got for you guys are (5 of wands, death, the emperor, and 6 of swords)

Troubled, that's what I feel and hear when I pulled out your cards, you might be going through rough time and rough patch in you life, might be some transformations, or some of you could be going through a hard breakup whether it can be friends or boyfriend/girlfriend, i strongly feel you will be troubling to move forward in your life you won't understand why is this happening, like i said very rough patch some of you fight in families, or friends or even in job for your own value and you will stand on your own ground, But slowly you will understand what needs to be done and you will start taking this all as a lesson to be better in your career and start focusing on yourself, and that's when some of you will cross paths with your future spouse, For some of you you could be meeting at work or your future spouse can be your superior, or boss, like forbidden type romance type of things, secrecy, but your future spouse will let everyone know yes you're taken and not by anyone but by them, For some of you it could be unusual place, or a place total out of comfort zone. You might also meet your future spouse while you are travelling somewhere or moving away from your home might be like holiday romance type of thing and your future spouse might have that boy next door kind of energy, Like you are sitting on airport or your seat and that's when your future spouse will strike a conversation which will be very flowy between you both and you end up exchanging numbers or socials. I also feel water might be surrounded in that area or around it. Or your future spouse could be from the area where is water, Meeting online is also in cards for you but very rare guys. I feel some of you might have piercing or tattoos not your fs but you.

Pile 2:

The cards I got (Temperance, two of wands, ten of cups, knight of wands and Strength)

A spiritual or religious place like you will be with your family especially mother and that's when you cross paths with them, I also feel that time you will be in self growth era, like you will be focused on yourself not anything else, determined to make yourself a better person and that's when you meet your future spouse, for some of you it can be in big city or around buildings as well, foreigner vibes or at least they are from different culture than you not from where you are, they might be traditional or religious too, I also feel it could be in garden where there are lots of trees or just an area with lots of greenery, while running, hiking, again! what did i say might be when you are self focused and decide to go with the flow, not very stiff energy, because some of you might be here be afraid what might happen in future, I also feel some of you could meet at big family gathering or reunion, or you might through some mutuals, They will discover you first and know at first glance that it's you they want to be with, I also feel children's or animals might be there for some reason? Your future spouse wont wait , they will know and vice versa and you will be both be eager to talk to each other, i also feel it could be some place of celebration or party where you might meet, I feel some of you might have trust issues or you are just skeptical of people's intention so you will doubt your fs, well that's okay though lol. But they will show you they are different. i strongly feel "Jump at the opportunity" might be a message for you from them or vice versa.

Pile 3:

The cards I got (7 of cups, Knight of pentacles, The magician, The Hermit, and 2 of cups)

It will be a slow burn type of romance, Slow moving you might meet your future spouse at the later period of your life, like when you have achieved things for yourself personally and professionally and you're content with yourself, and you know your worth, some of you might meet at someone's wedding might be your close friends, or someone you know, Your future spouse might be quite mature or like to take things at a slow pace, Some of you might be travelling solo, or into their self love journey, It might be cosmic reunion for some of you it might be past lover or past life lover, like past life lover is very strong here, i strongly feel some you might be improving your professional skills or manifesting them, they will be your total type on paper, they might be from your same city or at least somewhere close, some of you might have cross their paths with them without knowing, like they were there and we never noticed that type of thing. Some of you might meet on colder days or autumn weather, i strongly getting a message here "When i see you, it feels like world has stopped" so freaking sweet, some of you might meet at some sort of educational place or it has computer or books there, or when you meet them it's around you, and the sky will be very beautiful that day or clear, it might be divine interference and that's why its taking so much time for you to meet them, universe has heard your manifestations and what you need and they will give it to you! just be patient.

Thank you for stopping by! Take care and remember you are loved <3

[bluecrocss]

Yes. You are racist. (Buckle up, this is gonna be a long one)

So approximately half a year since the premier of the Disney+ Percy Jackson show, and almost two years since the announcement of the Trio's casting, I would like to take this moment to look back at the insane, racist and anti-black backlash that was launched at Leah Sava Jeffries and a few other cast members from the PJO fandom.

I'm not concerned with the trolls who are openly racist, who resorted to racist slurs and outright threats, everyone agrees that they "took it too far". I want to talk about the rest of you, the "I'm not racist, but.." people, the "What's wrong with wanting book accuracy?" people. Just to let you know, for the unasked question... yes, yes you are.

I've noticed the Percy Jackson fandom has been lording some weird superiority complex over a certain *unnamed* fandom that has fallen out of grace due to their recently outed bigot of an author. But honestly, y'all are not much different. The amount of vitriol and anti-blackness I have seen from this fandom (beyond just bullying a 12 year old girl), y'all don't have a leg to stand on.

Below is a breakdown of the most common arguments I have seen used to justify y'alls absolutely insane bigotry. I am going to explain why none of these justify the amount of anger and vitriol y'all have sent towards Leah, Rick or any of the cast.

I am not here to argue, and this is not a democracy. I am giving you a chance for some self-reflection and to understand that this pattern of violence directed towards POC actors (mostly black women) has never been justified in the name of "book accuracy"/"comic book accuracy"/"ending forced diversity" or whatever other excuses y'all try to make up.

If you still try to justify or argue further for any of these points, I will just block you. I am not coddling you through your racism. If anyone has seen any other dumb arguments floating around that I might've missed, feel free to sound off in the comments.

She's not book accurate:

Neither is Percy, Luke, Grover, Dionysus, Poseidon, and just about every other named character.

Rick already made it clear that physical features were not the priority with casting, rather it was actors that embodied the role. So why are the biggest complaints about Annabeth and Zeus? 🤔

What? You're gonna say everyone else got backlash too? I see you trying to obscure the main issue by playing dumb 😉

See my friend, yes, there were one or two comments about how Percy's hair should be black or how Luke is supposed to be blonde, but as soon as Leah was cast, none of those actors got any significant backlash. In fact, Walker and Charlie literally have an army of fan girls at their beck and call, calling them the perfect Percy and Luke, despite neither being "Book accurate". But then again, have we not observed the pattern of White boy of the month vs WOC to hate for the year? (Yes, I know Charlie isn't white. Further adds to the irony, doesn't it).

Why include character descriptions if you won't stay true to them, you cry? Well, my dear sweet moron, see, books and TV are two different mediums. Because in literature, you can't *Literally* SEE the characters, the author has to add descriptions to paint a picture in your mind, in TV... that's not an issue. So unless the character's appearance is necessary to the plot (like Luke's scar, or Nico being Italian) the show runners can actually focus on more important things.. Like ACTING and PERSONALITY.

2. It's just not how I imagined her:

News flash, babe! ANNABETH ISN'T REAL. None of these character are. They are concepts that originated from the brain of Mr. Rick Riordan. It doesn't matter how YOU imagined her. There are millions of people who read these books that imagined her several different ways. When the creator of the character watched Leah's audition and said, 'Yes! She embodies the character I created!", your imagined version of Annabeth ceased to matter. And guess what? The books still exist... they have not been burned. Your version of Annabeth has not disappeared. Go read the books.

3. Zeus can't be black/Gods have to be Greek/*Insert Character* can't be black:

Y'all did not read the books, I swear. You have to be fake fans looking to troll atp.

The gods move based off the center of western civilization. They change their forms/environment to reflect the culture they are occupying (they did it with Rome, now they're doing it with America). The gods change forms all the time. How we see them is not their true form as a mortal would disintegrate if they were to see their true form.

America is a cultural melting pot (specifically NY where Mount Olympus is now based). If the god's choose forms that reflect the current society they inhabit, they could literally be any race (keep in mind NYC is only 33% white).

All of this is literally SPELLED OUT in the Lightning Thief.

Furthermore, if you're going to push the ethnically Greek thing... Poseidon is British with a British accent and Hermes is Latino. The only ethnically Greek actor is Dionysus (who still doesn't look book accurate). Y'all are sounding like some white supremacists because do you forget that race is a social construct?

Before the advent of the transatlantic slave trade, I can promise you that the Greeks and the Anglo-Saxons did NOT view themselves as the same people. Why are y'all not taking issue with Poseidon's actor then?

Also, Percy Jackson has canonically had a slew of explicitly black demigods since the second book (including Harriet Tubman, which I have mixed feelings about 😭), so I genuinely have no idea where some of y'all are going with this point.

4. She was our smart blonde representation:

Don't pmo. I swear to God!

White, blonde women have NEVER been excluded from Hollywood. Representation is not something you lacked. The dumb blonde stereotype was a simple branch off of a larger misogynistic "dumb woman" stereotype. It has not truly been relevant since the mid 2000s outside of childish jokes.

This iteration of Percy Jackson will probably not go beyond the first 5 books, based off pacing and the age of the actors. So here's a fun game: 5 bucks to the first person who can find me a quote in the first 5 Percy Jackson books, where Annabeth laments her insecurities about being blonde (hint: there aren't any).

Also, her blonde hair does not hold her back at Camp because she is head of the Athena Cabin who are highly respected (and guess what?), ARE ALL BLONDE!

Her insecurities about her hair color are two or three lines at most in the later books, not this fundamental, core part of her character y'all all of a sudden wanna pretend it was. And guess what, as a non-blonde black girl, I was able to read those scenes of Annabeth feeling undervalued because of her looks and relate to her even if she didn't look like me at the time.

Why all of a sudden can y'all not do that with a black Annabeth? By every metric black girls are undervalued for their intelligence in academia more than white girls are, regardless of hair color. So your little representation of a woman undervalued by her looks would still hold. Do y'all dehumanize black women so much, that you are incapable of empathizing with show!Annabeth's plight in the way I could with Book!Annabeth simply because she doesn't look exactly like you?

Your issue isn't that she isn't blonde, it's that she is NOT WHITE.

Furthermore, Becky Riordan had tweeted previously (before the show was even cast) that Annabeth never needed to be blonde (probably recalling the BS y'all put Alexandra Daddario through), so even if they cast a white Annabeth, the blonde hair was never a guarantee. the author and producers all agree that it was not a significant part of her character. It's been a non-issue since day one.

Also, stop acting like smart blondes are rare in media... If you don't go watch some Legally blonde, Iron Man (Pepper Potts), Zack and Cody (Maddie), Liv and Maddie, FMAB (Winry), Captain Marvel, She-Ra, Buffy, etc. etc., and go sit down somewhere 🙄🙄🙄

5. It's not about race, but...:

Yes it is. It was always bout race. No other actors got as much hate as Leah. Her grandmother and other family members on IG had to mute their comments because they were getting so many threats.

Alexandra Daddario had to come to her defense on Twitter. Rick had to put out an official statement on his website. This girl has endured years of psychological torment for simply having the best audition. No one else is book accurate, no one else is ethnically Greek (except Jason Mantzoukas). Walker literally has British and German ancestry.

Why was she being called racial slurs on reddit and in youtube comments?

I know what you're gonna say, "I actually had problems with the entire cast", "I actually had a bigger issue with Walker's hair color", blah blah blah. Then why aren't you in Walker's comment sections? Why are you only making your displeasure known on posts defending/advocating for Leah? Why is she always your first example of 'wrong casting"?

Well, she "looks the most different"... Look up the term "scapegoating".

"Oh, I don't agree with the harassment. I just don't like the casting." Guess what? She's already been cast. They are not going to uncast her. What do you get out of still complaining about it.

All the vitriol you're stirring about her when you complain about her on Social media, it is directing people to send her hate, even if you're not writing it directly. It's is not enough to "not agree" with the racism, it is your duty to actively prevent it. And btw, these are young gen z actors, they are active on social media. They see the edits of themselves (even comment on it) and they most likely see these little "harmless" complaints you're posting. Are your upset feelings really worth contributing to the racist dogpile on this poor girl?

6. Why couldn't they atleast give her blonde braids?:

Why should they? Y'all wanted blonde because of the "dumb blonde" trope... that doesn't apply to POC.

A blonde black girl is gonna be viewed the same as a non-blonde black girl (or at worst, someone might decide she's "ratchet" or some shit for wearing colored hair). What difference would it make?

Why shouldn't Walker dye his hair, then?

7. Annabeth has Gray eyes:

Less than 3% of the global population has "gray eyes". Even if they cast a white actor, they would've needed contacts. Her being black is not the reason Annabeth's eyes aren't gray. Simply put, it is a plot element they removed, like the whole "names have power" element, or Ares having flames for eyes, or Dionysus using his powers to grow strawberries at Camp.

That's how adaptations work. Unnecessary plot elements are cut to save time and budget. This has nothing to do with her casting. They probably also didn't want to make child actors wear contacts (not a new practice).

8. Even if Rick chose her, he was wrong/Disney is forcing him to be okay with it:

Where do I start? Rick created the character. He can't be wrong. Do y'all have no self-awareness? Death of the author has no place here, because y'all are hung up on an aspect of the character that is not relevant to her arc or development.

Y'all's justification for wanting a "book accurate" Annabeth is that she was such an inspirational and important character growing up, and yet your behavior is so in conflict with the character you claim means so much to you. You're narrow minded, dismissive of bigotry and injustice, and disrespectful to the wishes of the creator of your favorite character; everything that Annabeth would never be. Y'all were never genuine fans of the books. You're bigots that needed an outlet for your rage.

Keep in mind, Rick has said countless times that PercaBeth directly mirrors his relationship with his wife. Y'all think he would have allowed them to cast someone who doesn't live up to the woman who has been by his side for decades? The mother of his children?

Regarding Disney forcing him, show me one piece of direct evidence that proves Disney in anyway pressured Rick to cast her. Cuz if you can't, that's baseless speculation. And if you have to resort to baseless speculation, maybe try to examine why it's so important to you to hold on to this belief.

9. So, I'm racist because I hate "race swapping"?:

To start, there is a difference between "race swapping" and "color blind casting". Often times, when y'all complain about the former, you're actually mad about the latter.

It would be "race swapping" if Rick and the team decided ahead of time that they wanted a black Annabeth and ONLY allowed black actors to audition. But the actual reality was that they accepted auditions from everyone (there were white actors and non-black poc that also auditioned for the role) and chose the best person who embodied the role. They didn't "make Annabeth black" and they didn't "make Zeus black", they cast black actors for those roles.

Y'all think you're being slick with your wording. Dismissing that is implying that they did not earn their roles fair and square. Which is racist. It's the equivalent of going up to a black college student and telling them they only got in because of affirmative action. You're dismissing the achievements of a person solely because of their racial background.

For all you people complaining about "unfairness" and "forced diversity", I would think hiring based on merit would appeal to you 🤔

71% of theatrical Hollywood leads were white in 2024 in comparison to 29% POC and you still think "black washing" is a thing? You still get this angry over a black person fairly earning a role because you think in a time where Hollywood only knows to do remakes and adaptations, that the majority of lead roles still *have* to be reserved for white actors?

Once again, white people have never been excluded from Hollywood for being white. Representation has never been something you lacked nor is it something you can lose. Your anger comes from seeing a black face where you think they don't belong. Because you feel you are owed a disproportion of representation in Hollywood.

10. Woke agenda/DEI/Forced Diversity:

If you are unironically using any of these terms in a negative light, it's already too late for me to reason with you. Look up the term "dog whistle". If you are sharing the same terminology with Elon Musk and his fanboys, maybe reevaluate some things.

POC are objectively underrepresented and have been historically excluded through actual laws and policies in Hollywood. There is no such thing as "forced diversity", you have bought in to a right wing conspiracy theory.

"Woke" is a term that was intentionally appropriated from the black community. It originally meant being aware of injustice and systematic threats to the community and is now being weaponized by bigots. Good job.

Diversity and inclusion is a good thing.

11. But POC deserve to have their own stories told:

We do. And we have been fighting for it for over a century now, and we've made great strides, no thanks to y'all.

No thanks to y'all gaslighting us about how little representation we get or that representation matters at all. No thanks to y'all pushing the idea that POC can't sell globally and obscuring POC actors in international promos. No thanks to y'all continuing to whitewash even to this day (Bullet train, the beguiled, gods of Egypt, atla, every portrayal of Jesus ever, etc.). No thanks to y'all calling every piece of media that has more than one black lead and more than one queer couple "woke". No thanks to y'all throwing a fit every time a black person in a fantasy setting isn't a slave.

Fact of the matter is, y'all never cared about POC "getting their own stories", you're only parroting our own words back to us now as a politically correct way of saying, "leave white roles alone" lmao

Well fun fact, actors of color getting opportunities to play lead roles and allowing poc to "tell their own stories" are not mutually exclusive. If y'all cared that much, instead of bullying a 12 year old actress, you could actually support up and coming independent POC writers, directors, and studios 😱

12. Studios need to stop "setting up" actors of color:

Do me a favor and google the term DARVO.

Your racism is not the fault of the studios for giving a POC actor a role that they earned. It is not up to the rest of society to tiptoe around racists to avoid their vitriol. It is our responsibility to hold them accountable and protect minorities from unwarranted hate. At most, you can say it's the responsibility of the studios to provide adequate support to POC actors who face this backlash.

At the end of the day, Hollywood only allows very few spots for POC actors (especially WOC), while simultaneously pushing a new white boy every month to put in everything. Putting minorities in these roles that are usually closed to them, usually opens the door to more actors of color than before.

Brandy being cast as Cinderella did a lot to push her into the mainstream (yes, she was already extremely famous in the black community atp), Halle Berry being the first, black, bond girl literally shot her to icon status, and even going as far back to what Anna Mae Wong did for Asian American actresses with her "femme fatale" roles.

At the end of the day, even with the backlash, *some* rep does more good for POC actors than *no* rep. The solution to racist backlash isn't to take away those opportunities, but rather to not be racist??? 🙄

Also, for everyone that claims that "POC race-swapping" is just as bad as "white-washing", despite white washing having a longer history and objectively causing more harm, note how the backlash to white washing never lasts as long as the harassment that POC get.

Like, no one brings up Scarlett Johansson's ghost in the shell role anymore, but you can best believe Candace Patton is still fending off racist trolls. As much as people hated the atla movie, people moved on quick from Nicola Peltz playing Katara since she was just a kid that accepted the role (re: daddy bought her the role), but y'all would not have any of that consideration for Leah Sava Jeffries.

But I digress...

13. What if we made Tiana white? Wakanda white? Hazel white...:

Ah, my favorite inane point. I was so excited to get here :)

See, I could start out by pointing out how "White washing" and casting a POC actor as a traditionally white character are not equivalent.

I could point out the history of hollywood ACTIVELY excluding POC actors and POC stories. I could point out how grossly over represented white people are in hollywood. I could point out that POC characters are so few in comparison that whitewashing them causes actual harm, where white people have never lacked rep.

I could point out how, because poc characters and stories are so often tokenized that their racial/cultural background is often directly tied to their character's identity, in opposition to a lot of white characters, since hollywood treats white as the "Default".

See, I could make all those points, but the thing is, the people who make this argument already know all that. They are trying to waste time by drawing me into a pointless circular argument that will sum up to "fair is fair", while ignoring all the context and nuance I previously provided.

So you know what? Forget it. Let me play your game.

I am actually fine with a white Tiana. Would it make sense, for her and her family to experience Jim Crow era racism, in the south while white? No. But we can look past it. Disney was never known for historical accuracy anyway 🤷🏿‍♀️

However, in exchange, the live action frozen will have a black Elsa and Anna, live action Rapunzel will be black, live action Merida will be black, we're re-filming Cinderella and Beauty and the beast to cast a black belle and Cindy, snow white will need to be recast as black, and we also get aurora whenever the live action sleeping beauty is announced. But then y'all can keep Tiana, deal?

You want a white T'Challa? Fine! (I'm partial to Ryan gosling), in the meantime, we'll be recasting Iron man, Captain America (Steve version), Bruce banner, Thor, Loki, hawk eye, black widow, ant man, captain marvel, Bucky, Peter Parker etc. All the avengers and their side characters, then y'all can have Sam Wilson, war machine and the whole of Wakanda (will it make sense that a sole, hidden, African nation is randomly made up of white people? Who cares? We get the avengers!).

You want white Hazel? You got her! I hope you have no problem with us taking Percy, Nico, Will, Poseidon, Jason, calypso, Rachel, Tyson, Silena, the stoll brothers, Sally Jackson, Hades, Hepheastus, ares, etc. But y'all can have Hazel and Beckendorf.

If we're gonna do this, let's commit all the way. Fair is fair, after all.

14. Leah isn't as "pretty" as Book Annabeth/Movie Annabeth:

I wish I could say this wasn't a genuine point I had read, but when all else fails, they will always go for a woman's appearance.

Now first of all, as a rule, I will never hold black women to white beauty standards. Our hair will never be long and silky enough, our nose will never be narrow enough, our skin will never be fair enough and our eyes will never be light enough (Might I recommend Toni Morrison, when you get the chance?). But Leah is unfairly gorgeous idc what any of you say, and you're not gonna have me use my defense of Leah as an opportunity to bash Alexandra either because she is also beautiful. These two queens slayed to the best of their abilities within this toxic ass fandom.

I find it funny, however, that so many of you harped on the "blonde" issue because you thought it was important that Annabeth be seen beyond just her looks, but quickly devolve to bashing an actress's looks when it comes to why she's not right for this role 🤔

I would also like to sincerely apologize that the 13 year old girl they cast in the show, wasn't as sexually attractive to you as the 24 year old woman they cast in the movie and sexualized through like 25% of her screen time (I'm actually not sorry. You're very weird if this is an actual point for you).

15. I don't agree with sending hate to the actor, but she's just not right for the role:

Once again, what are you doing by complaining about her casting on no other basis than her race?

The creator of the character said she embodied the role. She has already been cast, and Disney would be in a legal/production hell to recast her atp. Just because you're not directly leaving comments on her social media doesn't mean you're not part of the hate mob.

No matter how you look at it, your issues with her casting come from a very entitled and narrow-minded place. When you join in on these dialogues you are bolstering a sentiment that pushes more people to harass this teenage girl. When you leave these "harmless" complaints, on show content, fan posts or posts defending her, she's liable to read them because the cast regularly interact with fans online.

What do you have to say that is so important that it trumps protecting a young girl from the long-staying trauma of racism, of being told she doesn't deserve something she worked for because of how she was born?

16. I can't even criticize the show without being called racist:

Get. Over. Yourself.

Y'all are not the victim. Have fans of the show gotten protective of Leah and the young cast? Yes.

With good reason. This fandom is unbearably toxic.

Racism outweighs your need for a "perfect adaptation", sorry.

If you explain yourself properly and keep your critiques fair (like, even I don't think this was a perfect season, and will be sharing my thoughts shortly), no one is gonna call you racist.

You're preempting with that because in all honesty, you're probably planning to use your "critiques" of the show to pivot to one of the many points that I just outlined, and you want to pre-empt the criticism.

If a black Annabeth is the end all be all for you, just don't watch the show, no one's holding a gun to your head. Geez.

17. I'm Black/POC and I don't agree...:

Hey, Candace Owens... No one gives a shit.

First of all, for all the "I'm POC and I don't agree" people, you don't speak for us. Anti-blackness is rampant in just about every culture globally. You being not-white doesn't somehow make you less prone to hating black people.

But for the "I'm black and I don't agree" leftovers (assuming you're not just a 👩🏼‍💻 behind a keyboard). Black people are not a monolith. You're not obligated to think a certain way because you're black.

But consider why you're putting yourself up as a barrier to protect this hate mob. It's one thing to just state why you don't like Leah's casting, but to start off your spiel with "I'm actually black" as a way to weaponize the very identity politics you're critiquing... very strange. Not to mention, what are you defending?

The black community is coming together to defend one of our own, a kid who has been receiving death threats since she was 12, and this is when you feel the need to back the opposition?

I mean whatever... sometimes the house slaves would snitch to the master. There will always be some of y'all in the woodwork. It is what it is.

But when the exact ideology you defend is turned against you, when a Baltimore elected official is being accused of getting his job through "DEI", when conservatives are claiming that they wouldn't "trust a black pilot", don't decide that's where you'll finally draw your line in the sand.

All that being said, This is my Annabeth:

May every tongue that rose against Leah Sava Jeffries Shrivel and die in 2025 🙏🏿 My girl will keep winning ❤️

(video by @/waleahhasmyheart on TikTok)

[feistyvirghoe]

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 1 - you guys have such bright, very infectious because i’m just so giddy right now, yalls energy just shines bright like the sun omg, so full of positivity and love, happy as a child fr. i feel like people just like to consume your energy, has them all over the place, like pleading, there’s a push and pull effect you have, like you can be the most positive, optimistic person full of fucking light but then you have that other side to you that has people on their knees, like they can’t hold it in with you, the focus is on you guys, you’re hardworking and when you’re ready to fucking commit to something and go you just do it and get it started but you also know how to be inclusive and make others feel welcomed. i feel like people just want you to look at them, acknowledge them, you guys can adapt easily and may be spread out everywhere, you can’t just stay stuck to one thing and even within relationships im not saying you’re non-committal but you know your worth and some people and things just aren’t worth your time, you’re like a temptation, watch out for users and takers that may want to swindle you for whatever reason. you’re in tune with your femme side, you truly don’t need anyone to validate you and that’s a flex babe…it’s all you, something about the way you love and care for others, never dim that part of yourself, it’s so beautiful, the way you can own your mfkn power is by not letting bozos or losers come in and try to knock u off ur damn throne, standing up for yourself, believing that you’re fucking powerful just by being your true authentic self, confidently strutting your stuff, not giving away too much of yourself as well, connecting with your innermost self, reminding yourself who you are deep down inside, not being swayed the outside opinions of others, you may be a lil homebody and that’s okay..you’re sure of yourself and you don’t need anyone up in your face trying to fucking control you and make u feel small, by continuing to protect yourself in a healthy way, strong fucking boundaries is what needs to be set, don’t let these weirdos try to come in and fucking knock down your walls with their hateration and disgusting jealousy, show yourself off, embrace that fire within you, dont second guess yourself or make yourself small to fit in, burn bright baby boo. an affirmation for u - “i am a badass warrior and i conquer self doubt like it’s my fucking job!”

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 2 - your gentleness makes u fucking strike like lightning and i know you’re like “how?” babe we need more kind people like you on this planet, this world is so full of hatred and evil people, you’re kindness and compassion and just love for others makes you fucking strike babe, you’re a giver, very generous individual but i can see that you protect your heart as well, you know not to let shady people come and try to steal your energy, yeah that’s a thing, and you may need to be careful of that too, giving yourself away to undeserving people. you’re so content and just emotionally fulfilled on your own, u truly do not need someone else to fill your cup but im betting there’s a lot of people that would love to if you’d let them, you’re allowed be taken care of and poured into. but with how abundant your energy is and just how rich you are in spirit, of course it’d attract a bunch of energy vampires, just people with weird intentions. very emotionally mature and also vulnerable as well, well with the right people of course but you don’t hide how you’re feeling, and thats literally okay, you’re allowed to fucking let yourself feel free expressing what and how you’re feeling if that makes sense haha. you may throw people off, it’s like they dont expect YOU, like literally just you, your compassionate self. you don’t chase after people bc you know you’re already secure inside so don’t doubt that. maybe you really second guess yourself and how you’re coming off to others but i feel like people just see such a pure genuine soul, not just a nice person but a very kindhearted soul. you make others feel calm, like just content and chill haha. i feel like yall just make people smile, like smirking to themselves just thinking about you, omg admiring you and adoring you, u could be all up in people’s heads, unforgettable, maybe some just want to indulge themselves in you, just be cautious and aware of snakes hidden in the grass. i feel like i could go on and on about you guys, i dont want to make it too long though ;) your sweetness dude, you’re just like a lil fucking teddy bear ahhhh, someone who loves to help others, doesn’t matter what it may be just serving, wanting to be useful to others? maybe ppl have made u feel worthless bc of how kind you are like as if that’s boring or some shit, ignore those ppl, we need more kindness and love, don’t hide that side of yourself idc, let others who want to appreciate you show you their love. you’re also very in tune with your spiritual side and i feel you may dim that down too as if you’re not gifted i mean you’re here right?? embrace that side of yourself, you don’t even know how helpful you are to others, i feel like your generosity and just your pure loving soul is what puts a smile on others faces, so balanced, you’re just an unforgettable nurturer, a whole sweetie pie, a cutie pie ahhh, just such a sweet soul okay here’s an affirmation for you <3 “success is my middle name; watch me fucking conquer.” “i choose to surround myself with people who fucking respect me” and to own your power i feel like you just need to see you more, like you’re the one who can stay calm during the stormy weather, a shield for others, very protective over your loved ones and self, stay true to that boo! <33

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 3 - i feel like y’all are my glamorous pile, the ones ready to put their feet on the fucking ground and nobody ain’t going to fucking get in your way and stop you lmfao i’m hearing under the influence by chris brown, i feel like you guys got people feeling like they on drugs around you, your energy is intoxicating and addicting, some may even wanna knock u up to keep you as theirs wtf okay anyways hahahaha okay i feel like the way yall strike is like you’re in that empress energy very strong minded, in touch with your feminine side and you know when to cut a bitch off but then with that, the same people you cut off may try to come back and slither their way back into your life omg what the hell, so you guys are like the “heartbreakers” but not really because you just know your fucking worth more than what lames can give to you and not just that how they’re with you as well, goes for any relationship, you know when to fucking walk away and you’re not taking weird bullshit from anyone, you don’t play, i feel like your anger plays a part in making you fucking powerful, when you’re done you’re done and you can easily see through people’s bullshit, their facade, in hearing shit you up, lol u piss people off, idk what you’re truly doing, it could honestly just be you and your awareness, you’re not going to stand down and make yourself a tiny purse dog lmfao, very sassy as well, like no one can fucking control you, even if they wanted to, you guys make people uncomfortable but that’s there own issue, you may the wrong people for you uncomfortable haha, they try to fucking go and go at you relentlessly attacking you for no reason, so i can see why you’re protective of yourself and u don’t stand down, i mean with weird people like this honestly weird energy like this coming for y’all i understand why, it’s like you’re power makes others want to overthrow you and try and like one up you, just weird, got people competing for u and against you, i feel like they’re jealous of your fucking success and not just material success but your ambition, your drive, your resilience, never giving up on yourself no matter how hard it gets, you’re your own positive light in your life, you know how to make yourself happy, still shining, blowing out your candles, celebrating your fucking self like you should! yeah your fucking power just makes others despise you lmfao weird as hell, you live life on your own goddamn terms and you’re not sitting around waiting for anyone, a leader on your own, it’s like a natural quality of yours, you just know how to be up in front exuding dominance, like a lion, your walk may just give off CONFIDENCE i mean you have the emperor here, you’re just a fucking natural at it, it comes easily to you so i can see why others may feel offended by your power but they’re just projecting and not seeing their own power within themself, you look ahead, you don’t look for others, they look for you, goddamn lmfao! affirmations for you guys - “i’m letting go of negative bullshit, toxic people, and self doubt. i’m creating a fucking epic life on my own terms!” & “i am enough, i have enough, and damn right im fucking worth it!”

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 4 - i can see you guys regenerating in hermit mode, like taking some time to be alone with yourself building your power back up and cleansing yourself of all the weird energies you may have encountered, you like your solitude, my loners here, the ones who don’t mind leaving the party early, ready to go home and chill the fuck out or going on adventures by yourself and taking some time to just connect with your higher self if u wanna say that, just going within and seeing that light within yourself, you blossom on your own, you know how to make sure busy, it’s like when quarantine was around heavy, it didn’t phase this group, maybe it was even like a fuck yeah moment, nobody outside to bother you hahaha, like you guys may love to work out and get back to yourself that way, doing yoga, stretching, moving your body, but you may also be very cautious of the outside world, like you just jumped off the boat into uncharted territory taking time to feel out the place/environment/energy just watching where you’re stepping, or what you’re stepping into, making your way as you go along whatever journey you may be on, weighing out your options, not making hasty decisions, a thinker, maybe even a realist too. calm, balanced people here, like a lot of introspection, a very nostalgic person too. embracing the old memories, in tune with your childhood self, doing things that fuel your soul and what makes you feel the most peaceful, maybe you guys struggle with the mind so grounding yourself and staying away from the crowd is what helps you to stay sane and sharp, for you to be your most powerful self i feel like you just need that time away from everyone. yep it’s like you can’t really count on other people, do people make you second guess yourself, it’s like you’re there for everyone but they couldn’t even be bothered to hear you out, don’t give so much of yourself away to ungrateful people. you matter a lot and i can see this may be draining you as well, probably why you’re very cautious, but remember don’t keep yourself stuck on others weird projections and how they may try to take from you, it’s okay to be alone and regroup, if some one is offended by that then that’s there issue. the way u, my group four babies can uplift yourself and own your power is by letting yourself fucking shine and put yourself out there, confidently, i feel like people like making you guys feel small and quiet like a mouse, but you’re not a goddamn mouse you’re the fucking cat, and cats do whatever the hell they want to do, use your voice and own that fucking power, your words hold weight, speak more positively over your life and your self, unbiased opinions and being straightforward with your communication, don’t close yourself off from true unconditional love too..you deserve to be recognized and appreciated for all you do!!! keep fucking going, don’t give up on love, that goes for loving yourself too!! every fucking part of you and yes even the ugly bc the ugly is actually beautiful and makes you see the parts of you that you want to grow from and evolve beautifully into a better version of yourself! affirmations for y’all - “i’m unstoppable and nothing can hold me back, not even my fucking fears.” “my uniqueness shines like a freaking diamond! confidence? it’s my middle name, baby!” “i’m a badass boss babe and i don’t give a damn about what anyone thinks. i rock my confidence like a boss!”

𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐏𝐀𝐂, 𝐢 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢’𝐦 𝐠𝐥𝐚𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐢𝐦 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐡𝐞, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐢 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐮𝐩, 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲 𝐟𝐫, 𝐢 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞, 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐭!! 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐟 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞, 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐧𝐨 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐮 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐌𝐖𝐀𝐇 (^з^)-☆

[an-au-blog]

more zosan reversed tropes bc uni wants me dead and this is my way of coping:

not fake dating, but where everyone is super convinced that they aren't ACTUALLY dating...

One day, Zoro and Sanji call everyone over and announce that they are getting engaged. It comes as a big shock to almost everyone because: 1. they say it too matter-of-factly, with disdain almost; 2. they never told anyone they were dating. Luffy, being Luffy is very happy for them and tells them they can't get married if he doesn't wed them as their captain. They respond that they never expected anything else. Robin and Franky congratulate them, Brook starts getting ready with the music, but Nami and Usopp? Nami and Usopp couldn't believe it. And they refused to let everyone else believe this lie. They decided that both Sanji and Zoro are lying, but why??

They make a makeshift investigation, but it turns out that Luffy and Robin genuinely believe them, Franky and Jinbei think it's none of their business and they can't bring themselves to break it to Chopper and Brook because they were too happy to attend a wedding. Soit was up to Nami and Usopp to prove to everyone else that there was no way they're dating.

At first they start looking at how they interact with each other. It was obvious they were faking it - they never started bickering and fighting and even when they just sat in silence Sanji would throw a ladle in Zoro's direction because he's snoring too loud. Or Zoro would make a biting comment about Sanji and it would start all over again.

But that was how they usually were, so it wouldn't prove much if some of their friends were so willing to accept their announcement at face value knowing they act like this. So Nami takes upon talking to Zoro in private, while Usopp talks to Sanji in private.

At first, Nami starts telling him how she would take money off his debt if he tells her the truth, but then he says the same thing that he said to the crew. That yes, the cook is a pain in the ass, but they love each other and want to get married. She threatens to tax him for lying, but he keeps insisting there's nothing else to say. She meets up with Usopp again, hoping that he did a better job than her, but he just said that Sanji caught onto him from the start saying it's for real and whatever he's scheming will not work.

They change tactics and switch partners, hoping that Nami will have more luck with Sanji, as he can't say no to her, and Usopp can try getting under Zoro's skin.

Usopp starts off by telling Zoro about how a great swordsman should have a nice and powerful partner, mentioning Hiyori, but then the unexpected happens and starts almost defending Sanji as his choice. "Sanji is stronger and nicer than her." "He's a worthy opponent and we already have the same priorities (Luffy)", "He's stubborn and driven, it's great." he says it all with a shrug and Usopp almost feels like he misheard him. "But you always fight?" Usopp says as a last resort. Zoro smiles widely "Yeah, it keeps me on my toes, my blood pumping. I love him so much, Usopp."

The sniper wasn't sure he wanted to prove they weren't a couple anymore. In fact he was starting to believe them. Nami came back with an equally defeated face. Nami tried using her charm, but Sanji kept going "Alas, my dearest Nami, Zoro and I are really getting married, unfortunately it is no joke. Unless you'd like me to take you out on a date!" And in desperation, Nami said "yes", but then Sanji flipped a switch. Saying there's no way, he was just joking and he'd never do that to Zoro. He's done self sabotaging and he really doesn't want to ruin things for them.

Robin overheats then and goes. "Oh, why didn't you ask me. I've seen them sneaking into toilets and private places like teenagers for months now."

And the theory had been debunked.

[andersonfilms]

ღ ELECTRAPLAYER ✶ SEVEN INCHES DEEP !

series masterlist collab series w/ the talented, sweet baby — @abbyscherry

tags. eighteen+, strap sex (abby!r), daddy kink, breeding kink, masc!reader but can be read by all, part of a series but can be read on it’s own.

you're gripping her hair like she's your favorite vice, cock stretching her pretty pussy, even prettier ass recoiling against you. toned back arched for you as she moans like a whore. only down side is you can't see the effect you're having on her pretty face. the moans abby continues to let out are enough to hold you over until you can see her sun-kissed skin cheeks again, hundreds of adorable freckles decorating her nose with the soft bend. the one you adore more than the stars in the sky. 

you’d been staring at her all night the day before, entranced with her beauty yet again. it’d just been the two of you, a starry skin, and her. the empty beer bottles kissing the plush grass had her singing, saying some stupid joke but caused you to have a belly laugh. incredibly loud, obnoxious even, but it makes her laugh even harder. 

the sun couldn’t hold their own against her shine. the brightest star you’ve ever known. the sick feeling comes back in moments like these, afraid of the unknown. what if it doesn’t work? nagging and deafening, the thought picks at your brain like zombies off a dead carcass. all of this could end in a moment, just like the rest but you try to believe otherwise when she does shine with blissful ignorance. 

you want to sit in it with her. 

sometimes, it’s hard to believe she’s just yours. there’s not a single soul but you to take care of her, praise her, worship her. every bit of her is for you, but tonight she’s stubborn. batting her eyelashes, give you fuck me eyes. the little brat knew it would work too. 

“is this what you wanted? fucking begging me all day to be fucked. texting me, calling me all day while i train, fuck, making me lose my focus.” you pull harder on her golden hair. a fist full of her hair, a whimpering slut — you can practically see the drool. “and sending me the video of your tits in the shower, slippery and soapy. low fucking blow.” 

“daddy, i just needed you. m’sorry, i—” you slap her ass, effectively shutting her up. well…her words only. abby moans instead, muffled by the sheets beneath her. “what? you’re fucking sorry? had to cut my day early because of you. what was so important it couldn’t wait?” 

“i don’t want to say. it’s really embarrassing.” she shyly remarks. 

“babygirl, i’m seven inches in your pussy. don’t think there should be any more secrets between us.” you slap her ass again and abby  knows what it means. 

better fess up or there’s much more painful punishments to come. 

honestly, abby ponders for a moment. almost taking them up on the offer but her need to cum far outweighs the bratty little devil resting on her shoulder. even if she hadn’t made the decision for herself, you would have gotten abby there. 

your pace increases, fucking her harder, faster. “talking back to me isn’t a smart move. you and i both know it.” you can hear just how wet she is; every thrust sends her closer and closer to what she craves. the pleasure is practically on her tongue. pink, raw lips pleading for the craving she can never satiate. not with you. 

the confession threatening to fall from her tongue, but she bites on it. rather taking the pinching in her mouth than admit she’s wrong. with anyone else, she’s always gotten her way. but with you, you effectively know how to shut her right the fuck up. 

“tell me what i want to hear. what’s in this pretty head angel? hm? does daddy need to fuck your harder? y’know i will.” without prompt, you start piston fucking into her, the flimsy headboard beating against the wall. her moans growing louder, heavier, sluttier. 

“f-fuck, daddy. shit, shit, shit.” abby can’t stop whining, her thighs shaking controllably, back arching ever further, if it was even possible. “please? fuck, i-, need you to spill, daddy. please need to be stuffed full of your cum.” without any buffer you’re pulling her hair so hard, abby’s back collides with your chest. 

your cock filling her up even deeper as you continue to fuck her. she almost pulls your hair out from the root, before her neck to bitting into your neck, sucking, before she lets her tongue soothe over the mark. 

it’s obvious, you’re so close to cumming. you can hardly stand and fuck, the base of the harness is rubbing against your clit. god, combined with abby’s moans. you’re close. 

“fuck yeah? wanna have my babies baby? want me knock you up? pump you full of cum until you just can’t fucking take anymore?” 

“please, god, daddy i-, i’m going to come. can i come? please? fuck, need to come all over your cock. please say yes. god, daddy?” 

the last words are a nail in her coffin. 

“c’mon babygirl. show me how much you want me to breed you. need to know how worthy you are of my cum. my babies. fucking show me how much of a dirty slut you are.” you press your lips on her ear, kissing it softly. “that's right. just for daddy."

hope you enjoyed! mwah mwah!

[23victoria]

“mi hermosa niña” ❀

carlos sainz jr x fem!reader

summary: request by @mimisainznorris!! Do you write Sainz x fem!reader fics? If you do,can ⭐please⭐ make a fic where Carlos and reader are in a happy relationship but she's lil bit insecure about her looks and Carlitos tries to help her with that. I think that would be cute🤧

warnings: insecure reader, that’s it really not too specific and some fluff

authors note: thank you for the request baby 🤧!! i hope you enjoy it!! any feedback is appreciated and please like, comment, and reblog!! hope you enjoy!!

f1 masterlist

You’ve been with Carlos for a year and a half now, and everyone says you're one of the cutest couples on the paddock. Your relationship is the kind that other people look at and feel envious of. You’re loved by everyone, always getting compliments on how beautiful you are. But behind closed doors, things aren't always as perfect as they seem. You've always had insecurities about your body, and today, it's one of those days when those insecurities are overwhelming you.

Carlos decided to take you out for dinner tonight. It was supposed to be a fun evening, a chance for the two of you to relax and enjoy each other's company away from the noise and pressure of the paddock. But as you stand in front of the mirror in your shared apartment, all you can see are the flaws. You trace your fingers over the parts of your body that you wish you could change, feeling a wave of sadness wash over you.

Carlos walks into the room, looking handsome as always in his neatly pressed shirt and jeans. His smile fades as he sees the expression on your face. “Cariño, what’s wrong?” he asks, his voice full of concern.

You can’t hold it in anymore. Tears start to fall as you turn to him, your voice breaking. “I just... I don’t feel pretty. I look at myself and I see everything that’s wrong. I don’t understand how someone as handsome as you could be with someone as ugly as me.”

Carlos’ eyes soften, and he steps closer, gently taking your hands in his. “Oh, mi amor,” he murmurs, his heart breaking at seeing you like this. “You’re the most beautiful woman in the world to me. Every single part of you.”

You shake your head, pulling away to look back at the mirror. “You have to say that because you love me,” you whisper. “But I see the way people look at you. You could have anyone you wanted. Why would you choose me?”

Carlos turns you to face him, cupping your face in his hands. “I choose you because I love you. Not just for how you look, but for who you are. Your kindness, your strength, your laughter – they make you more beautiful than anyone else.”

“But my body...” you start, but Carlos stops you with a gentle kiss.

“Your body is perfect because it’s yours,” he says softly. “Every mark, every curve, every so-called flaw tells a story about your life. They’re beauty marks, reminders of who you are and what you’ve been through.”

He wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a comforting embrace. “When I look at you, I see the woman who stands by my side, who supports me and loves me unconditionally. I see the woman who makes me laugh, who makes every day better just by being in it. You are so much more than what you see in the mirror.”

You feel the warmth of his words start to melt the icy grip of insecurity. You cling to him, letting the tears flow freely now. Carlos holds you tighter, whispering soothing words in your ear. “You are beautiful, inside and out. And I will spend every day reminding you of that, no matter how long it takes for you to believe it.”

After a while, your sobs subside, and you pull back slightly to look at him. “Do you really mean that?” you ask, needing to hear it one more time.

Carlos smiles, brushing a tear from your cheek. “I’ve never meant anything more in my life,” he says. “You’re my everything, Y/N. And I wouldn’t change a single thing about you.”

He kisses you again, and this time, you let yourself take him in. You can feel the love and sincerity in his touch, and it starts to drown out the negative thoughts in your mind. You’re happy to have someone like him by your side, helping you see the beauty that he sees.

⋰✾ ❁ ✿ ∴⋱ ✾ ❁ ✿ ∴⋱⋰✾ ❁ ✿ ∴⋱⋰✾ ❁ ✿ ∴⋱

Carlos keeps you close as you both head out for dinner. The restaurant is cozy and intimate, a perfect setting for the heartwarming evening ahead. You can’t help but feel lighter as you sit across from Carlos, his reassuring presence calming your nerves.

The conversation flows easily as you talk about everything and nothing. Carlos makes you laugh with stories from the paddock, and you can’t help but marvel at how effortlessly charming he is. He’s always been able to make you feel special, even on your darkest days.

As the evening progresses, Carlos reaches across the table to take your hand. “I want you to promise me something,” he says, his eyes locking onto yours. “Whenever you start feeling like this again, come to me. Talk to me. Let me remind you of how incredible you are.”

You nod, squeezing his hand. “I promise,” you say softly. “And thank you, Carlos. For everything.”

Carlos smiles, a look of relief and happiness washing over his face. “That’s all I need to hear, cariño,” he says. “I’m here for you, always.”

⋰✾ ❁ ✿ ∴⋱ ✾ ❁ ✿ ∴⋱⋰✾ ❁ ✿ ∴⋱⋰✾ ❁ ✿ ∴⋱

The night ends with a walk along the beach, the city lights reflecting off the water. Carlos keeps you close, his arm around your shoulders as you stroll in comfortable silence. You feel a sense of peace that you haven’t felt in a long time, and it’s all because of him.

When you finally get home, you feel lighter, more at ease. Carlos’s words echo in your mind, and for the first time in a long time, you start to believe them. He loves you, truly and deeply, for who you are. And maybe, just maybe, you can start to see yourself through his eyes.

As you lie in bed that night, wrapped in Carlos’s arms, you feel a warmth spread through your chest. Carlos whispers one last affirmation as you drift off to sleep, “You are my everything, Y/N. Never forget that.” And with those words, you close your eyes, a small smile on your lips, feeling more loved and cherished than ever before.

Bonus:

carlossainzjr

liked by bellahadid, landonorris, lewishamilton, scuderiaferrari, charlesleclerc, and 3,256,357 others

mi hermosa niña 😍😘💋

y/n_ig awww baby!!! i love you 🥹❤️

↳ carlossainzjr @.y/n_ig i love you my beautiful girl ❤️

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[ilylovelyz]

Please do literally anything with Kenma I’m obsessed with him rn

⍣ ೋ how they fell in love

˚ · . kenma kozume & oikawa torū

kenma kozume — because you made him an apple pie. it seems silly, yeah–but that's truly what made him began developing feelings with you. not because of the many hours you spent playing with him in silence, talking to basically yourself as he was too shy to respond to a female. not because you gave him your very detailed and simplfied notes you made specifically for him because you knew that he's be too tired out of his mind from the winning-streak he did last night to pay attention today. no, it was because you made him an apple pie, something he only mentioned once in passing.

"hey ken.." you cheekily say, a large grin written across your face. kenma looks up from his nitendo, eyes greeting you silently before they move back to his screen. "wow! such a greeting!" you tease, despite being ignored so blatantly, you couldn't help but giggle at his intense expression that he sports while playing.

you feign a sigh, your hand coming up to tap at his wrist, earning a surprised flinch from the blonde. his hand quickly pulls away, allowing you to take advantage of the opening he gave you and snatch his nitendo from his other hand. "y/l/n-san.. what are you doing..?" he groans out, his hands trying to reach over the desk to steal back his game.

to anyone else, it looks like he hates you. maybe he does–, but to you, that's just the way he speaks. "oh please, you can spare a minute or two." with that, you're smiling greatly at him and suddenly pulling out a black container, setting it on top of his desk. "ta da~!" you laugh, your hands laying on top of your knees anxiously.

his cat-like eyes glance up at your own, confused, he just sits there. you dart your eyes back up to him and to the container, hoping that he'll get the message to open it. it seems to work, "...you wan't me to open it?" you roll your eyes at his response, "noooo, it's just gonna stay on your desk for all eternity.. jeez—just open it already!" kenma jumps at your raised tone, rushing to open the container in hopes of settling you down.

he blinks down at the contents inside the container, his hands resting on the edges. "this is.. apple pie..? for me?" he asks, his tone more soft onces he realizes. "i made it, for you." you smile, urging him on to taste it. "here," you lift a the pink fork on the inside, slicing the apple pie and lifting it up, only stopping in front of kenma's mouth.

he glances up at you once more, his eyes training onto the piece of apple pie. it does look yummy... finally, he moves forward and takes the bite into his mouth, chewing it slowly to inspect it. you watch him closely, watching for any reactions.

with a swallow, he sits there, his eyes looking elsewhere. "it was good," he admits, earning a content laugh from you. before you could ask him anything else, you heard the call of your name. you follow the voice, seeing that it's your friend standing in the doorway. she calls for you, wanting you to come with her.

"enjoy it, kenma-chan," you say, giving him back his console and walking away. kenma stares at you blankly, still holding the fork in his hand as he watches you leave the classroom. his eyes glance back at the miniature apple pie, sighing softly. he digs his fork in for another piece. he's glad you left, that you didn't see him blush so much when he took the first bite of the best apple pie he's had in awhile.

oikawa torū — because you stood out from the others and stood your ground. despite the two of you not dating or talking, you were still running the "relationship". he thought because of his looks, you'd easily give in like the rest of them, fall to your knees and end up heartbroken when he'd leave. but no, you made him work for it–for you. hell, he couldn't even tell if you liked him back. he didn't even realize it, but he was chasing you around like some lovesick puppy, following your orders and looking up at you like you were some goddess. he finally realized it when you called him out for it, and even then, it made his heart pound in his chest for you.

oikawa watches with those pretty brown eyes of his, they reflect of his target, you. he chews on his pretty lips, ripping the skin of their delicate flesh. his features, oh his pretty features, once so relaxed and perfect, are now scrunched up into a face of worry and fear.

he watches you, his eyes occasionally darting to the random guy next to you whenever he talks to you once more. in this moment, oikawa wishes so bad he was in your proximity, he wants to hear what the stranger is saying to you. is he flirting with you? is he asking for your number? maybe he's a family member. no, wait, no family member would move close to you like that.. no, no family member would wrap their arm around your shoulder!?

oikawa leaves the court, running hurriedly to where you sit. he ignores that the game is about to start, and that he hasn't even stretched yet. he makes his way up the bleachers, hastely walking towards you. but it seems your attention isn't even on him, it's on the guy next to you instead. or is it? from what he sees, it is. but really, you're just letting the scene in front of you play, it's cute to see oikawa this way about you.

"y/n-chan." he says, trying to make his voice sound as stern as possible. you feign a giggle at the guy next to you, pretending to not hear oikawa to bait him even further. it works, as before you can react he's wrapping his hand around your wrist and pulling you up from your seat and down the bleachers, practically dragging you out of the gym.

you hold back a menacing laugh as oikawa pushes you against the wall of the gym, seeing the hurt and fear on his handsome face. "y/n-chan, who was that? why'd you ignore me?" he asks, his lips pulled downwards into a frown. he cups both of your hands into his own, holding them tightly. "huh? what are you talkin' about? i didn't even know you were there." you say, acting dumb about the whole situation.

"yes you–, y/n-chan who was that guy?!" he whines, desperate to know the answer. his whining is cut short when you snap back your hands from him, lightly pushing him away from you. "why do you care? we aren't even dating." your voice is feigned with annoyance, your arms crossed upon your chest.

his heart drops at the realization. right.. the two of you aren't even a thing. his eyebrows furrow at the thought, he thought, just like the rest, you'd be the one to ask him out, not the other way around. if the two of you aren't even a thing, then why does he care? much to his own expectations, he doesn't even know.

he sighs deeply in defeat, his hand subconsciously moving towards yours. his eyes are glued to the ground, lips stuck into a thin line. you try not to let it show, but it breaks through, your laugh just escapes through your throat, confusing the already upset oikawa. "what's so funny?" he asks, his eyes wide at your sudden outburst. "haha–it's–it's, really nothing, heh–, you're so cute, toru," you struggle to say, emphasizing the use of his first name, he's begged you to call him by his first name, but you've just never done that.

his heart fluters at the use of his name, blush coating his cheeks so nicely. cute? "oh.. oh, were you messing with me?" he asks timidly, his hand coming up to scratch at his nape. oikawa lightly scoffs when you nod, still laughing at your own cruel joke.

finally, with a last chuckle, you nod your head, smiling mischievously at him. "so then.. who was that guy?" he asks, feeling more confident within himself. you shrug your shoulders, "a friend i paid $5 to act like he was flirting with me."

oh. oikawa sheepishly backs away, his face painted a light color of pink. he feels his phone vibrate, probably a text from iwaizumi calling to see where he's at. just as he takes out his phone and is about to open it, you're pushing yourself forward, your hands planting themselves flat on his chest as you get onto your tippy toes to give a longing kiss onto the apples of his cheeks.

"good luck," you say cheekily, returning flat onto your feet and walking away from the dazed oikawa. he can only turn his head to watch as you walk back into the gym, his cheek tingling in the spot where you kissed him. god, you just have him wrapped around your finger.

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[ivyluvsyouu]

I saw your series of genshin characters if their s/o dies and I wanted to request it with Kaveh Tighnari Furina Lyney and whoever else you wanna add?

𝑶𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒆𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝟑

𝑻𝒘: 𝑩𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒅, 𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉

𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒔: 𝑲𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒉, 𝑻𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒏𝒂𝒓𝒊, 𝑭𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒂, 𝑳𝒚𝒏𝒆𝒚, 𝑨𝒓𝒍𝒆𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒐,𝑵𝒆𝒖𝒗𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆

𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝟏 (𝑪𝒚𝒏𝒐, 𝑨𝒍𝒃𝒆𝒅𝒐, 𝑿𝒊𝒂𝒐 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑲𝒂𝒛𝒖𝒉𝒂)

𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝟐 (𝑫𝒊𝒍𝒖𝒄, 𝑲𝒂𝒆𝒚𝒂 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰𝒕𝒕𝒐)

𝑲𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒉

You had left for a commission a day ago. You weren't supposed to be gone long, maybe a few hours at most which is why when Kaveh woke up the morning after you left and you weren't in bed with him, he was extremely worried. He asked everyone he saw that day if they had seen you, and he even went out to where your commission was supposed to be to look for you but nothing. Not a single trace of you was left there, By the end of the day he was worried sick, and he was going around asking for the second time if they had seen you.

He had gotten Cyno to go out in the desert and look for you and he found you dead near the sight of where your commission had been. When Kaveh found this out he was in a state of shock. You? dead? his s/o? his strong s/o? there was no way, he wouldn't believe it. He refused to believe it. For a few months after your death Kaveh was just in complete denial and everyone was worried about him. Even his roommate Al-Haitham had tried talking to him about what had happened to you but every time he did Kaveh would just shake his head and deny it. "No, Y/n's not dead..." he would say, even if deep down he knew he was just saying this because he couldn't admit it. He knew you were gone, and he knew that denying it wasn't helping.

About a year after your death is when he started to come to terms with it. And it was the hardest thing he had ever done; He barely left the house and when he did, he didn't talk to anyone. He took about a year just keeping to himself and trying to cope and after that year he slowly started to become himself again. But even after that it always seemed like a piece of him was missing.

𝑻𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒏𝒂𝒓𝒊

You had always been extremely sickly. It was something you had delt with since you were young and when you met Tighnari and ended up starting a relationship with him he wanted you to live a good healthy life. He would always try to make new medicines for you, but nothing seemed to work. Tighnari knew deep down that your sickness would be the thing to kill you, but he would've never admitted it.

One morning Tighnari woke up to the sound of you coughing and it was clear that you were having a hard time breathing. He immediately got to work trying to find something to give you to help but nothing worked. Tighnari desperately tried to save you but in the end, it was futile you ended up dying that afternoon. Tighnari was with you in your last moments. "Please hold on Y/n.." He begged as he held your hand tightly. As you took your final breaths Tighnari just broke down into tears.

Collei heard him crying in the room over and came into the room and she gasped when she saw the sight before her. Collei did her best to comfort Tighnari, but nothing could help right now. "I appreciate you trying to make me feel better, but I need some time alone right now" He choked out. He spent the next few days locked up in his office just mourning. After about four days he knew that he had to return to work even if it was hard. When he returned to his duties, he pushed down all of his emotions and he just kept everything hidden from everyone. Whenever someone would ask him how he was doing and how he was coping he would just respond with. "I'm fine."

𝑭𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒂

(𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒓𝒔!! 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒏 𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕!)

You were killed by a member of the fatui. You were out late one night, and you had run into the fatui on accident, and it didn't end well for you. The beloved s/o of the God of justice Furina, the people of Fontaine loved you just as much as they loved her and the whole nation of Fontaine was in mourning.

But it was nothing compared to Furina's mourning. You were the only one Furina trusted with her secret. The only one she confided in. You were everything to her and you were just gone? She was absolutely devasted and for months after your death she locked herself in her room. Refusing to come out and leaving all of the work to Neuvilette.

And she had no intention of leaving any time soon. She couldn't face her people like this. She couldn't put the act on right now she just couldn't. One morning she was looking out the window of her room and it was raining, and she had noticed that the water levels had indeed risen. She sighed and she knew she needed to return to her work. She did what she does best, and she forced herself to put on the act that she was okay and that she was coping well with your death. She forced herself to be strong and once again she forced herself to be a god.

𝑳𝒚𝒏𝒆𝒚

Lyney being involved with the fatui meant he was involved with some pretty dangerous people. However, he never thought that those people would end his beloved s/o's life. Lyney had some problems with a few of the people in the fatui and one of those people took it out on his s/o and one day when you were on a commission one of those people killed you. Lynette was actually the one that got the word that you had gotten killed, Lyney was away from Fontaine and when he got back, he expected to be greeted by his beloved s/o but he wasn't.

Instead, he was greeted by his sister Lynette who looked extremely worried. "What's wrong sister? Where's y/n?" He asked. Lynette frowned and looked at her brother. She told him that you had been killed and as soon as the words left her mouth Lyney gasped and covered his mouth. He couldn't believe what he was hearing, He wasn't even gone from Fontaine for long and you were fine before he left. You kissed him goodbye and told him that you'd see him when he gets home. You were alive a few days ago and now you were just gone? it was so much to process. He sat down and he stayed silent for a few moments with hundreds of thoughts running through his mind.

After a while he still realized Lynette was there waiting for him to say something. He nodded and spoke softly "Thank you for telling me..." He said getting up and walking to his room. He cried himself to sleep that night, the bed felt so empty without you next to him and he didn't get much sleep at all that night. Lyney tries to push forward and move on like normal since he knows he has a job to do, and he has to take care of his siblings. And while the people around him might think he's doing better he never fully gets over you.

𝑨𝒓𝒍𝒆𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒐

Whenever you had commissions, she would always accompany you and today was supposed to be no different but as you two were about to set out Arlecchino got word that there was a situation she needed to tend to. You assured her that you'd be fine and Arlecchino nodded. She believed you would be fine, and she kissed you bye and she told you she'd meet up with you later. But when she met up with you later what she saw shocked her. She found you lying in a pool of your own blood. You had gotten hit pretty bad in the stomach. She ran over to you, and she scooped you up in her arms. "Dear? Dear what happened!" She said trying to shake you awake.

But she was too late, you were dead. She brought you back the House of the Hearth and there was a funeral held for you. She knew mourning was for the weak, but she couldn't help but give herself a few days. She gave herself a few days to mourn and a few days only. When the few days were up, she returned to her work even if it hurt and it was hard. She became a lot more ruthless, and the children of the House of the Hearth noticed their father becoming a lot colder and more distant.

𝑵𝒆𝒖𝒗𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆

You and Neuvillette had been married for years. You were his whole world and he loved you to pieces. However, one day you came down with an illness that was going around Fontaine and had already taken the lives of so many in Fontaine. Neuvillette knew better than anyone that you were strong, and he believed you could beat this. However, over the next few months you were just getting weaker and weaker and eventually it became clear that there was no way you were going to survive.

You had a peaceful death surrounded by your family, your friends and of course your beloved husband. Neuvillette didn't take your death well, he neglected his work duties for months and since you were close friends with Furina, Furina understood completely and gave Neuvillette as much time as he needed before he came back to work.

Eventually Neuvillette came back to work, but he kept to himself, he didn't talk much and completely shut himself off away from everyone. He never re married or found anyone else, he couldn't there was no way he could move on from you. You were his everything and he thought about you every day, wishing there was some way you could come back to him.

𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒌 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒎 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈!<𝟑 𝒍𝒆𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒆𝒍𝒔𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒆𝒆!!

[kimingyuslover]

Missed Connections

Synopsis : You swear you can tolerate anything because this is an unwanted marriage to him, but why's this one hurts so much?

Word count : 2,716 and some change

pairing : Choi seungcheol x fem!reader

Genre : arranged marriage!au, contract marriage!au, strangers to *** ***** ***** to exes, angst, slight fluff.

Warnings : angst, tears, italic means person on the other side of the phone & message, chaebol!reader, chaebol!seungcheol, ceo!reader, ceo!seungcheol (not mentioned), like 1 curse word, implied cheating? (Seungcheol goes on a date because his toxic friends say so), Seungcheol is a jerk boo 🍅🍅, mentions of pregnancy (reader is pregnant), mom!reader, slight Joshua x reader, this fic does not represent his character in real life!

a.n : yes, i cried while writing this, Seungcheol's sucks

The sun peeked through the window of his bedroom, which once was shared with you. He opens his eyes groggily, his eyes adjusting the sunlight that goes to his eyes.

Surprise, it's a word that will describe his expression right now, seeing a divorce file on his nightstand with a pen on top of the paper, lying peacefully waiting to be used by him.

“What the fuck?” he mumbles with his raspy and sleepy voice.

He thinks he might be dreaming, that when he sleeps again and opens his eyes, you're on his side while he's hugging you tightly, his morning will start with your kisses and this all was just in his head.

But it's not. When he slaps his cheek, it hurts. It feels so real.

And then, when he realised that the divorce file was real, he hurriedly searched for his phone, wanting to call the person he knew so well but also didn't.

“The divorce paper, you've already signed it? i'll pick up my stuff and take the paper with my lawyer” you said on the other side, voice sounding so enchanting but so cold, like he never heard before.

Your voice usually sounds like it's coated with warmth and sweetness, but now it's just filled with coldness.

he forgot when he first saw you, you were given the cliche title ‘ice queen’ by the employees.

“Why’s there a divorce paper on my nightstand? Why are you not here? In the bed, with me” Seungcheol said, hurt evident in his voice.

“What do you think seungcheol? you're finally free, you can go out as much as you want with your so-called friends, you don't have to worry that head more, our company will still be concerted, and the best part, you can go freely with that woman of yours” Seungcheol furrowed his eyebrows with confusion.

“Why–

you cut him off before he even speaks, “i call off our arranged marriage, Seungcheol. you said it yourself, that you, Mr. Choi, does not want this marriage from the first you saw me, and that was proven when I saw you with a woman, in a fancy restaurant, just both of you, not with anyone else and I learned the fact that your friends told you to do that.

Our arguments will lead to one of us leaving the house that once you promised we'll build together with love, and I just have to be patient. When I saw you with her, I realised that was the beginning of our marriage's downfall, so I made the decision that would not leave negative comments from everybody else, so your company will not have a backlash from the stockholders even if it's hurting me in the process.

You promised me, Choi Seungcheol. to take care of me, try to love me, and even have the audacity to tell me to be patient with your heart. I've done all of that, but what you have given me is just aching in my heart over and over again.

My friends already told me that this marriage was bad for me and will hurt me in the end, but I'm blinded by your love bombing act, and I was so naive that I thought you will ever love me back, that we will have a happy family, with 4 children, 3 boys and 1 girl. we'll live anywhere i want, you said back then.

Do you know how much I cried that night? when I saw you with her, and when I knew that you and me would never have the happy family we once planned?

That day, I was going to tell you about me getting pregnant, but I guess fate doesn't want us to be together because they know it’s better for me to hurt now than later.

Tomorrow will be the last time i'm going to go there, and the final court will be the last time I saw you” after finishing the words that you've planned to give him right when he calls you, you hung up the phone, not giving him any chance to replied because you know, when you heard his voice your heart will hurt more.

Seungcheol drops his phone onto his bed sheet. He tries to recall the memory, and when he does, there's a hard pang in his heart.

regret started to fill up his figure, and he rushed towards the bathroom to take a shower.

He's planning to meet you today to talk about your marriage, hopefully not for the last time.

“Is Mrs. Choi here?” Seungcheol said to the receptionist at your company.

She hesitates at first, then starts to speak, “i'm sorry, but it's Ms. Hong and she does not want anybody, especially you, Mr. Choi to go to her” she says.

Seungcheol has tried to call you again and again and again, determined to fix the marriage he ruined.

and his heart hurts even more when he reads your chatroom. It's him who sent the last message, and you left him on read.

You know what? you're too naive, too invested in our relationship, and that's why it's not working. Can't you be more patient? i have my own things to do

He knew he was being a jerk when he sent that to you, but back then, he's heating up because of your arguments that are constantly happening.

Tears start to fall from his eyes, all you need is love, to which he promised will give you his, he should be grateful that you still give chance after chance even though you know that he will still be like that.

he drives to your penthouse, your summer house, your cabin, and even your house, but you're not there.

as he went to his car with disappointment on his face, someone called his name.

“What are you doing here, Seungcheol?” He freezes and it hurts. You usually call him with terms of endearment, but now you just call him by his name, which he hates so much if it's coming from your mouth.

Seungcheol runs to you. Wanted to hug you, but he halted his plan when he saw you looking at him like you used to before he was introduced by your parents as your soon-to-be husband, so cold with no emotion behind that oculus of yours.

He explains everything, telling you that his friend makes him go on lunch with the woman you saw. He even goes as far as kneeling in front of you.

“But you still go on a date with her? Even when you don't want to? i've said it to you countless times. i can tolerate anything because this is an arranged marriage, but cheating is an exception” you said while looking down at him because of his position. You don't even bother to usher him to get up from his knees. Seungcheol frowns at your words, but you're right. When his friend told him, he could refuse it, but he didn't.

His words caught up on his throat. He can't say anything anymore, because at the end of the day, he knew that his action was so sinful because for god damn sake, he's married to you!

“You're funny, Choi Seungcheol” You left him kneeling on the ground while going back to your car. You managed to hold your tears in front of him because you're not willing to let your tears fall for a boy who's not even a man.

When you're already gone with your car, Seungcheol gets up to his knees, and he realises that he hasn't even asked about the baby.

“Don't worry, my love, mommy will protect you, no matter what” you said while caressing your baby bump.

It's been approximately 4 months of your pregnancy, and 4 months since you're not on the same roof with Seungcheol.

You know you'll stress out yourself if you stay in that house, and you can't risk that.

You've been staying in a hotel for the past months, but luckily for you, your sister-in-law has a 5 star hotel, so you won't have to search for it.

[ఇ ◝‿◜ ఇ]

The first court is today, and you're going there with your lawyer and your sister-in-law (Soo-jung) because she says she wants to help you, and you thanked her for that.

You show up with a white dress, black blazer, your Jimmy choo pumps, and white birkin as the cherry on top.

Seungcheol saw you with adoration in his eyes, thinking, "Why can't he see you like this when your marriage is still there?”

He doesn't want to make eye contact with anyone with you and yourself, but when he does make an eye contact with Soo-jung or you he will divert his eyes to look somewhere that isn't you or her.

He's scared, what even your family will think about his family, about him? after he hurt you and you being pregnant was not helping.

Now it's your final court. This time, you dress differently, you're wearing white shorts, a brown thin belt, soft-pink Ralph Lauren button-up, a white lady dior, and a white slingback kitten heels with your baby bump that's already showing.

He feels guilt start building up in his body when the judge knocks his hammer three times, and he's trying his best not to spill his tears every second now.

he hears several footsteps going to him when he looks at you with his tear filled eyes.

you open your mouth while crossing your hands in front of your chest, then you speak, “Take care of your health, don't eat junk food like you liked to, this baby will get a new father soon, but i will still introduce you to them”

As soon as you finish your sentence, you start to walk away with your lawyer, brother, and sister-in-law (who gives him a disappointed and angry look).

[ఇ ◝‿◜ ఇ]

It's been years since your divorce, but Seungcheol is still a mess. He can't blame anyone but himself for this one.

After the divorce, he cut all of his friends who told him to go on a date that day. He’s in denial for years, even when he knows that they're giving a bad influence to him.

He goes on a lot of interviews, and he never fails to mention to you in his interview, hoping you will see him on tv shows and better yet, with his child.

You, on the other hand, are already living your best life with your son, you’ve given birth to him 4 and a half years ago, and now he's your most favorite person in this universe.

You decide to move to Switzerland when Minjun– your son (Hong Minjun, Edward Hong) turns 1 year old.

There you met Minjun's dad, who happens to have the same surname as yours, Joshua Hong or Hong Jisoo because that's his Korean name.

You hesitate at first to be in a commitment because of your past, but Joshua makes it clear that you can trust him, and everything will be fine.

Joshua is a gentleman, a man who you dreamed off everytime you doze off, a man of words and action, and you really want Minjun to be like him when he's older.

Minjun characteristics start showing up lately, and just as you expected, he's already being a mini gentleman to you, and the manner that you and Joshua taught him is prominent with his actions and words.

You're proud of him, and you finally get your highest dream.

Having a happy family has been your dream for as long as you can remember, even when Joshua's not Minjun's biological father, but he acts like one and Minjun, too, acts like Joshua's biological son.

[ఇ ◝‿◜ ఇ]

Joshua decided that this month he and you will go back to Korea for the Christmas holiday, because for the last 3 years it's always been your family to come to Switzerland.

You can't forget how happy your parents and your brother's family look when they see you coming home with Minjun and Joshua.

“I miss my daughter so much. How have you been, sweetheart?” your mother said while hugging you, which you replied with a ‘i'm fine, mother’ and a wide smile on your face.

The next day, you're going to have a visit to your company in Seoul, and so you bring Minjun with you because Joshua is having a meeting and probably will be back at dawn.

“Minjun, are you excited to see mommy's office?” you ask Minjun when the light goes red, which Minjun replies with an excited nod and wide grins, “yes! I am so excited!” Minjun said with Korean and an accent.

The security, receptionist and your workers still remember you, they even try to get in a conversation with Minjun which brings a smile to your face.

“Minjun, will you wait here in Mommy's office while Mommy is getting our lunch?” you said while crothed to his height and holding both of his tiny hands.

Minjun nodded at your words, “can i play with secretary Jeon Mommy?” he asked, and this time it's your turn to nod your head, “yes, you can”

You already told your secretary to watch Minjun, so you don't need to worry.

You walk to the café near your company building, it's been your favorite place since you moved to this branch of your company.

When you get your order, you take a seat on the side of the road.

Not so long after, there's someone who sat in front of you, and when you saw him you furrowed your eyebrows.

“What are you doing here, Seungcheol?” The same question from those years threw Seungcheol off guard, the bad memories he never wants to remember.

“This used to be, or is it still your favorite place to go for lunch, and i miss you so i came here, what i didn't expect is you're going to be here” Seungcheol said, there's defeated plastered on his face.

“How's your life?” You begin, so the tension can be lowered a bit.

“Messed up, after our divorce. How's yours?” he replied with simplicity.

“Amazing. He's 4 and a half now, his name is Hong Minjun and since i'm not living in Korea he uses his foreign name too, Edward Hong” you said referring to the baby you carried when you're getting a divorce with him.

“Where is he?”

“Playing with secretary Jeon”

“I think i can't do this anymore, I'm sorry, i was an asshole back then. I swear I changed! just give me a chance, please” Desperate sounds so clear, and you look at him in disapproval.

“I have given you chances, over and over, but you throw it away like it meant nothing”

Even after you replied to him with that, he still begged you to come back to him, tears in his eyes mirroring how desperate he is.

He is still doing it until someone calls your name and a little boy runs to you, calling you mommy.

That's when he realised in front of him is his son, that he failed to protect.

And when he gets up when he sees you do the same, he turns his head to the man who calls your name.

There's when his heart drops to his stomach, thoughts running a hundred miles per hour, thinking of the worst scenario in his head, that the man in front of him is your—

“Y/n's husband, Joshua Hong”

Your husband, and that means he never got the chance to make you his anymore.

The tension can be seen by anyone passing by, an ex-husband who hurt his ex-wife deeply, and the current husband who treats his wife like a princess.

Joshua breaks the awkward silence after Seungcheol introduces himself with, “Let’s go, my love, your mother sends a location to the restaurant we're going to eat for lunch” with a smile that Seungcheol swears he wants to rip from Joshua’s kind face.

You replied to Joshua with a smile, and you three excuses yourself from Seungcheol and went to Joshua’s car.

Seungcheol had his heart broken again, and the reason is still the same.

You.

Oh, there's addition for the cause of his broken heart.

You and Minjun.

[kpop---scenarios]

Reckless (8)

Pairing: Lee Know x Reader

Warnings: Sadness, Violence

Word Count: 2.1k

Taglist: @hyunjinhoexxx @ovulatingrn @jisunglyricist @guiltycoco @fawnpeaks @purple-bell @caught-in-the-afterglow @ana-marais98 @rylea08 @astraystayastayastray @partyparty-yah @skzswife @sillyhal @feellikecinderella @asphalstead @minh0scat @anthropologymajorkpopmultistan @hyun-hwanj @zerefdragn33l @stelle-aka-simp @iambangchanswife @seungminsapuppy @chanbahng29 @blackbluerose666 @mmarusa @glitter-z

@gabriellamarie

Previous Chapters

“Y/N.. you have to listen to me.” Jisung panics. “I was only trying to do what was best for you.”

“What was best for me? So me being so depressed I couldn't shower, brush my teeth, or even fucking eat was the best for me?” You scream. “Why do you get to choose who I love and who I want to be with?”

“He's my fucking best friend! I didn't want things to change between us, or me and you. And I knew they would. Not to mention I think there's better guys out there for you.” Jisung says, glancing at Minho.

“Your reasoning for ruining him and me was because you didn't want to lose your best friend? Are you fucking kidding me!? How selfish are you!? I can't.. I can't even look at you right now.” You whisper.

“Why would you tell her? Fuck sakes.” Jisung yells at Minho.

“Are you serious?” Minho gasps. “You told her I said some awful shit and you're mad at me for telling her that you made me choose?”

“It was for her own good! And yours! Neither of you would have been happy with each other!” Jisung screams.

“How do you know!? Huh, how do you know!? I've never felt so fucking safe and content with anyone, except when I was with Y/N. She made me feel like I could do anything..like I could be anything. You have no fucking idea how much better I felt about my shitty life when I was with her. And YOU took that away from me!” Minho screams back. “You ruined me! You ruined her! So fuck you!”

“Fuck you too!” Jisung yells. “What does it matter now anyways, huh? You gonna abandon Maya and your fucking baby to be with my sister now? Huh?” Jisung yells.

You stand there, shock flowing through your body, your mouth hanging down as you stare at Minho with tears in your eyes.

“Fuck.” Minho screams. He lunges for Jisung, tackling him to the ground. You can barely even process what was happening in this very moment. You were too stuck on Maya and baby.

A baby.

He was having a baby?

With someone else..someone he really didn't even like. You watched Minho on top of your brother, getting shot after shot to Jisung's face, and Jisung trying to shield himself. You can't breathe. Your head was spinning. You so wished this fucking moment was a dream. You closed your eyes trying to wake yourself up but it wasn't working. Why wasn't it working? You just wanted to get up from this fucking nightmare.

Jisung manages to get Minho off of him, hitting him wherever he could. You turn around, walking out the front door. You continue to walk and walk until you have no idea where you are. You barely even remembered how you got to where you were. You pull out your phone, calling Chan. You needed someone but not your friends. You needed someone who was going to give it to you straight and not pussy foot around, and that person was absolutely Chan.

“Hellooo?” He answers.

“Can you pick me up?” You whisper. “I'm not terribly sure where I am.” You sigh.

“Give me street names and a number on a building if you can. I'll find you.” He says, hanging up the phone. You slip your phone back into your pocket, finally letting your tears flow. You crouched down, resting your head in your knees as you hugged yourself and sobbed. You felt so betrayed by the two people you trusted more than anyone else in this world, despite all the shit they had put you through.

“Y/N.” Chan whispers. You look up at him, you're sure mascara is smeared across your cheeks. He looks at you sympathetically, holding his hand out. You reach out to grab it, he pulls you up, helping you to his car. He opens your passenger side door, closing it once you're in and heading to the driver's side. The entire car side is silent, aside from your whimpering. You appreciated that he wasn't badgering you for information but instead waiting until you were ready. He pulls into the parking lot of his apartment building. You follow him inside, heading to his couch, where you pull your knees up to your chest and take a few deep breaths.

“So.” You begin. You can feel your lip beginning to tremble again as you try to get the words out. The tears threatened to roll down your cheeks again.

“Take your time.” Chan half smiles.

“Jisung.. he um, he told Minho that he had to choose between me and him.” You whisper. “So he had to make a decision if it was going to be me, or his best friend, his brother.” You say.

“What?” Chan gasps.

“That's not even the worst.” You half laugh. “Remember how I told you those things Jisung told me Minho said about me?” You ask. He nods his head. “Turns out Minho never said them. Jisung made it up to make sure I stayed away from him.” You cry. “And now I find out that Maya is pregnant, and Minho is going to be a dad, and I feel like I have no one and my entire world is fucking falling apart.” You whimper. Your chest gets tight as you try to catch your breath. Chan grabs onto your arm, looking you in the eyes, his face close to yours.

“Breathe, Y/N. Come on, breathe.” He smiles. You take a few deep breaths, maintaining eye contact until you feel like you can breathe again. He smiles at you. You lean in, pressing your lips to his. He doesn't move away, but the kiss.. Is not how a kiss should feel. You both back away, looking at each other a little confused.

“That wasn't..” Chan starts.

“No offense, but it felt like I was kissing a cousin.” You giggle.

“No offense taken, I feel the exact same.” Chan laughs. “I think we're meant to be friends.”

“I wholeheartedly agree.” You smile. “Look, I'm sorry about this.” You sigh. “Calling you, all the crying and big dump of issues I just threw at you.”

“Isn't this what friends do?” He smiles. “I'm pretty sure friends are meant to be there for you when you need them.”

“Well I really appreciate it. Any advice on what to do? I don't know if I can go back there.” You say.

“Did you hear back from that psychology scholarship you applied for a few weeks ago?” He asks.

You shake your head. While you were on your healing journey, you had applied for a scholarship at a different University across the country. You had thought it would be nice to get away and go somewhere for a fresh start for a few months at least. You really didn't think you were going to get it.

“Well feel free to stay here tonight, if you want.” He tells you. And that's exactly what you did. You had messaged Jisoo and Hyunjin, letting them know there were some issues and you were turning your phone off.

It was mainly because Minho and Jisung would not stop fucking calling and texting you. You needed time away and would turn it back on in the morning, when you were ready. That night you spent your whole time with Chan, watching movies, eating good food and just talking. You talked about everything and nothing, how you were feeling, your feelings for Minho, which, despite everything, haven't changed. You still loved him, and seeing him after a month of not seeing him had every single thought and feeling you had rushed back to you at full force. But you weren't sure if you could do it with him, not to mention he was going to be a dad. How could you come in between him and the mother of his child? You weren't that type of person.

That night you laid on Chan's couch, your mind racing between everything. You were so fucking conflicted and you honestly just wished you could get away. You turned on your phone, feeling the need to scroll mindlessly through TikTok or something. You had a few texts come through that you ignored, and an email. You checked the email, and sat up on the couch.

“Congratulations Miss L/N Y/N.” You read. “You've been selected for the scholarship in…” You pause. You screamed, as loud as you could, forgetting it was 3am and Chan was sleeping. He rushed into the living room, looking panicked with a baseball bat in his hand.

“What?” He yells. “What happened?”

“I GOT IN!” You cry. “I got the scholarship!”

“Oh my god, Y/N, that's amazing!” He yells, rushing over to hug you. He squeezes you so tightly, like a proud dad. It filled your heart with so much joy. Jisoo and Hyunjin had the same reaction when you told them the next day, but then sadness filled the room.

“I can't believe you're really leaving.” Hyunjin pouts. You take his hand, holding it tightly.

“I'll be back. I promise.” You smile. “It's only for a few months. And it'll be good for me to get away. From everything.”

“I still can't believe Jisung did that to you.” Jisoo sighs. “I broke up with him, by the way.” She tells you.

“What? Why? You really liked him.” You gasp.

“I did, but the fact that he could do that to his own sister is just appalling.” She says.

“His heart was in the right place, Ji. He definitely went about it the wrong way, but don't let it ruin your relationship. You seem to be having a positive impact on him and I like that.” You smile.

Later that day, you went home. You see a depressed Jisung sitting on the couch, wallowing in self pity and ice cream. The second he sees you, he jumps off the couch. A tear rolls down his bruised cheek.

“Y/N.. I'm so fucking sorry.” He whispers. “I was so selfish and just such a piece of shit.. my god, I'm so sorry for everything.” He tells you. You walk towards him, wrapping your arms around him.

“I know.. I know your heart was in the right place.” You sigh.

“But I went about it in the worst possible way. And I will never forgive myself for that, Y/N. I was really just trying to protect you.” He says, holding you tighter.

“I know you were.” You say. “I forgive you, but I'm still so fucking mad at you.

“Jisoo is too. She broke up with me.” Jisung sighs.

“I spoke to her already, I'm sure you'll be getting a call soon.” you smile. “Listen.. I have some news.” You say, pulling away from him. You lead him to the couch to sit down.

“Oh god, what?” He whispers. You can tell he's scared.

“I got accepted for a scholarship at a university.. across the country.” You grin.

“Oh my god, Y/N! That's so amazing! I'm so happy for you!” He yells. “How long are you gone for?” He asks.

“Just a few months.. but given everything, I need a few months away.” You half chuckle.

“I think so too. A nice little fresh start. Recharge and do a lot of thinking. Make some new friends. I'm really excited.” You say.

“When do you leave?” He asks.

“Saturday..”

“That's tomorrow!?” He panics, standing up. “Get upstairs and get packing! Right now!” He exclaims. You laugh as you stand up, pulling him in for another hug. You head upstairs to your room, pulling out your suitcases and start packing, making sure to do the essentials first. A few hours into your packing, there's a knock at your door.

“I am packing Jisung, don't worry!” You yell. The door opens.

You turn around, Minho stands there. You don't know what to say.

“You're really leaving?” He asks.

“Not forever.” You say. “But this is a great opportunity and I need time.”

“She's not pregnant.” He blurts out. “It was a false alarm.”

“I'm sorry.”

“Why? I didn't want to have a baby with her, I don't even want to be with her. It's you, Y/N. I know everything has been shit these last few months and I'm so sorry for that but it's all done. Everything is out in the open, we can really be together.” He smiles.

“Minho..” you sigh.

“Please Y/N. Please don't go. I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone. I want it all with you, I'm all fucking in. Just please.” He begs.

“Please don't leave me.”

[menuliso]

alright i ranted about this on twitter but lowkey i want to see what people on tumblr have to say bc i havent really seen anyone talk about this. though lowkey someone probably already has.

has anyone else noticed a trend in the bkdk space on tiktok of people really insisting that ‘BakuDeku🧡💚’ and ‘bkdk’ are two completely different things? because i have, and i don’t get it.

according to these people, ‘BakuDeku🧡💚’ is the version of bkdk where people mischaracterise them, sexualise them, and are overall ‘weird’ and ‘cringe’. they think it’s problematic. meanwhile, ‘bkdk’, the one they identify as, is ‘according to canon’ and is the ‘slowburn’, ‘right way of shipping bkdk’ and theyre not ‘weird’ or ‘cringe’.

to me, when people say this, it feels like a way to split the fandom up and appear more likable to dudebros and antis. its an ‘us vs them’, its a ‘we’re better than those weird shippers, we’re normal’ thing. and. it really doesn’t make any sense. absolutely no one has used ‘BakuDeku🧡💚’ as a way to display their preferences or opinions or anything,,, it’s just the extended ship name with an emoji combo. this ‘divide’ doesn’t exist, it was invented solely by the self proclaimed ‘normal bkdks’. and they make SUCH a big deal out of this.

the dudebros aren’t going to like you any better because you ship bkdk in a ‘normal’ way. the antis aren’t going to be kinder to you just because you’re not as ‘weird’ as the rest of us. you are in fandom. fandom is weird. it’s been weird since its conception. by splitting fandom up into categories, you are encouraging negativity to sprout up and you are pressuring yourself and other people to stay in the realm of ‘normal’… aka… making fun of other shippers for not being ‘normal’, or being cringe. or staying in the puritanical mindset that anything involving fictional characters doing anything more than kissing is harmful and bad and apparently super bad morally.

be cringe. be free. no one fucking cares. don’t be scared of other people having silly fandom fun. don’t be scared to have silly fandom fun yourself. once you stop hating, and stop caring about the haters, the internet is so much more enjoyable.

[aguineapigcouldntdothis]

I can completely break down the notion that jews do not experience ethnic discrimination within western countries, specifically the USA.

for context I am genetically half jewish and half italian, and since I was born i have been more connected to judaism in a cultural and a religious sense. though its not a huge part of my life like judaism is it's definitely still important.

a lot of people like to argue that jews were once not seen as white and now we are, just like Italians, Greeks, Irish, etc were (at least in the USA) and I can confirm that's total bullshit. I have, not once in my life, been treated badly for being Italian. I have never had someone shame me for my appearance, make fun of my cultural food, threaten me, insult me, insult my father, say they wish I died, harassed me, or any other violent or demeaning acts because im Italian. not once in my entire life has that happened. even living in the rural USA where traditional white supremacy is alive and well that did not happen.

yet I have absolutely been harassed, verbally abused, demeaned, belittled, etc. for being jewish. Ive experienced antisemitism since I was 5 and possibly younger. ive heard holocaust jokes, nose/eye jokes, had swastikas drawn on my things, received death threats, gotten rape threats, been called a murderer, been told I should burn, was told I was poisoning the seas, had people deny my very real trauma, was told that I should've stayed dead (for context I overdosed and had to be resuscitated once), and many more things all because im jewish. these are just instances in which it was specifically mentioned or heavily heavily implied that its because im jewish.

Many of these things happened when theae people didn't even know I'm a practicing jew and some even when I stopped practicing for a couple years. a lot of the time the only reason they had to believe I was jewish was my appearance and yeah sure they were right but what it shows is that appearance alone is enough for people to be antisemitic. you know, if jews weren't ethnically discriminated then why do people target us for having things like large noses and curly hair? or for the foods that we eat? or for anything that isnt directly related to religious practices?

anyway I dont believe for a second that anyone who thinks jews dont experience ethnic discrimination in the USA has ever had a genuine conversation with a jew about antisemitism. 5 year old me did not deserve to feel like he was ugly all for some assholes to say that jews are making all this up.

☆this is part 2 in which I will add important context bc if anyone is gonna overanalyze my argument its me. u can read it if you want its not necessary to understand the post.

like I said I have spent most of my life in rural areas where there are many less jews than in big cities and obvious white supremacy is common. im 100% sure this affected a lot of the antisemitism i received.

I am sephardic, not ashkenazi. most goyim do not have a clue what this means. those who do generally think it means "jewish but spicier and more exotic (aka less american)" which could have contributed to some of the discrimination i faced for not being seen as American enough.

this is my experience not anyone else's! I am not discrediting what other people have gone though regarding any experiences with discrimination

[saintjosie]

hi, i promise this question is in good faith, i genuinely just want your opinion!

as an asian tguy, i've noticed a phenomenon of white tgirls constantly using anime gifs to express their feelings or use to represent their reactions. and while i agree that anime is very cute, it stirs something in me when i scroll through so many blogs that ONLY use anime gifs to react. idk it would make me feel less weird about it if there was more variation i think but. maybe i’m overreacting?

i want to support my people and be anti-racist but i also don't want to end up with a transphobic belief in the process. i figured you'd be a good person to ask as a fellow asian on the "other side" of it all. sorry if this is tedious to read and answer

first, this post on orientalism is a good primer and says a lot of things way better than i ever could.

unfortunately there is no easy answer for this and the short answer is “it depends”.

the root of this issue lies in both objectification and also the difference between appreciation and appropriation. there is absolutely an issue with people in general objectifying asians and appropriating asian culture and this is not limited to just white people or white trans fems; this is a problem with western culture as a whole.

but it is very important to add that i do believe that your singling out of white trans fems is somewhat unfair. there is absolutely an issue of white queer and trans people misunderstanding intersectionality and failing to recognize their white privilege but the way that white trans fems interact with anime is no different than the way that all of western culture treats things like anime and k-pop.

so regarding the “it depends”, what matters is ultimately that each and every person is responsible for dismantling their own privileges and biases. there is no sweeping generalization that i or anyone else can make that says “this is bad” when ultimately it comes down to how each person interacts with the media they consume. are there people who appropriate and interact with anime inappropriately? yes absolutely. but there are others who don’t too.

and so even if this is an issue, we cannot address this issue to an entire community because we don’t know how each individual is thinking, and even if we did, (and this is very important) we cannot do a damn thing to change it other than to provide education.

push too hard, it goes nowhere. if someone isn’t ready to hear something or isn’t in the process of dismantling their own privileges and biases, it goes nowhere.

your discomfort is valid but there is nothing to do but continue to advocate and ask allies to do the same.

best of luck!

[zoeyuniverse]

American pie [2/2]

Category : Caitlin C × !momreader

Summary : You and Caitlin have known each other since childhood, you love each other more than friends but the situation pushes you to live in hiding. While Caitlin suffers from this situation and lets you know it, an event changes everything.

⚠️go to the masterlist if you haven't read the first part

Today

It's been exactly 4 months.

4 months since Caitlin told you how she felt about the situation.

4 months since you last talked to her.

And yet, the very next day, she sent you a message in the evening, asking you if you were upset and if that was why you hadn't gone to see her play.

It was her last day at the tournament, and she'd missed her girl's reassuring look in the stands.

She'd started to blame herself, not for saying what she felt, but for waiting. Because in the end, she'd expressed herself to you with a lot of anger and a lot of blame. Yet she knew that you were doing your best and that you loved her more than anyone else on earth.

But you didn't answer her messages that night or the next few days.

She tried to call you several times, came in the evening after your classes, but never found you there.

When she came to your house, it was your father, whom she had known as long as you, who asked her to leave, insisting that you didn't want to see her and that she had no business being here.

Despite her willingness to make excuses for you, Caitlin suddenly felt rejected. You couldn't ignore her just because she had decided to show you the negative side of your relationship. So she stopped sending you messages and stopped coming to see you.

The following months were the worst of her life. For the first time in sixteen years, you didn't share her daily life. No evenings just the two of you, no post-game massages, no movies that Caitlin always fell asleep to, no impromptu cooking sessions. Her bed seemed way too big and her apartment way too empty.

Yet you're everywhere: in picture frames, in subway tickets reminding her of your disastrous dates, in your glowing toothbrush on the edge of the sink (Caitlin always made fun of your toothbrush, but you like useless things like that), in her Spotify playlist, and even in her clothes.

She started to get really depressed, not knowing how to deal with the flood of emotions that suddenly washed over her. Some days she was hungry and ate a lot, as if to suppress her feelings, and other days she didn't even have the strength to get out of bed.

It was palpable on the court, and despite a few attempts at communication from her coach and teammates, Caitlin never wanted to talk about it, staying closed in her corners and easily accepting the decision to play her less.

Nothing mattered if you weren't there to see her do it and cheer her on.

And if it wasn't easy for her, it wasn't easy for you either.

You didn't ignore Caitlin all this time out of the goodness of your heart, but out of necessity.

After what happened, you needed to be alone, to collect yourself, to calm down. You needed time to accept and adjust to your new life.

Still, you miss your girlfriend (well, if she's still your girlfriend?). She's the pillar of your life, the one who listens to you, comforts you, finds solutions for everything, and gives you a smile.

But you know you've made a mistake this time. You've hurt her and you feel terrible. You know you're unforgivable, and anyway, you can't think of a good way to explain what's happening to you.

- You've found more than love in Caitlin, you've found a best friend. I've been there for you, but now you need her.

Your mother told you this during one of your many crying sessions.

Of course, in the light of events, your "boyfriend" had finally confessed the deception to your parents.

They both remained silent on the subject, then your father became very angry when Caitlin tried to come and see you.

Finally, your mother spoke. She explained that she didn't understand how two women could be attracted to each other, but that the idea of you being unhappy with a man just to please him broke her heart, and that in the end Caitlin was a nice girl and what happened between you was none of her business.

So it was she who encouraged you to get back in touch with her, sensing that even though she was your mother, she didn't always have the right words to help you.

Your message was "viewed" for two hours before you received a reply.

You knew you deserved her coldness, but you couldn't help but feel bad and hopeless.

If she were in front of you, you would probably be on your knees begging her to please listen to you. You can't lose her, not now, but you don't know what to say anymore and the words come on their own, in the hope that they will convince her.

Her answer was not what you expected, but deep down you knew you deserved no better.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You thanked your mom for helping you get organized so you'd be free at 5.

You dressed quickly, trying to make an effort, but not wanting to give the impression that you were taking this appointment for granted. You were afraid that Caitlin would think you weren't taking things seriously if you ever got too confident.

So you waited for long minutes, sitting at the table closest to the entrance, staring at the front door, which only made your heart beat faster in your chest.

You and Caitlin are in your favorite place where you spent your childhood and teenage years. You call it "The Cowboy" because of the decor and the giant Lucky Luke statue in the entrance. The Cowboy is a sort of bar and restaurant with a children's play area and a vintage jukebox that plays only one song on a loop: Don McLean's "American Pie," your favorite with Caitlin.

Finally, the tall brunette walked through the door. Her gym bag at arm's length and her towel around her neck. She looked for you as if suddenly lost, then made her way to your table.

She looked at you coldly, then sat down.

You just noticed the gaze of two young girls to your right, who weren't shy about devouring Caitlin's torso with their eyes, clad only in a sports bra.

And just as you were about to ignore this, judging that you were in no position to show your jealousy, Caitlin slipped on a sweater, knowing full well how you felt about the situation. And seeing that she wasn't lacking for a little attention on your behalf calmed you down a bit.

- Hi.

- Hi, do you want something? You suggest.

- That you tell me what you want to tell me she said curtly.

You were trying to lighten the mood, to reassure yourself about your relationship with Caitlin, but mostly to put off the moment when you were supposed to tell her. Because the truth was, you didn't know how to break this kind of news to her, since you had trouble understanding and accepting it yourself.

- Are you going to marry him? Are you going to move to the Maldives?

- What are you talking about? What are you saying, Caitlin?

- What am I saying? I should be asking you this question. You've got me running around in circles. Do you know how worried I've been? I've been imagining the worst scenarios! That you were seriously ill, dead...then I had to realize that it was something else, so I started imagining that you were going off with him, that it was over, I dreamt of you making love. I threw up Y/N. But I can't get over it, you never leave my thoughts, even on the field. So now, despite all the anger I feel for you, I want you to tell me what's going on!

- I'm sorry, Caity.

You apologize, looking up at her with tears in your eyes. You blame yourself tremendously, knowing that she's suffering so much is unbearable for you.

- But sorry for what the hell?

She stands and stares into your eyes. She burns with rage and takes it upon herself not to let her words overtake her thoughts.

- He's three months...

you said, lowering your eyes and letting yourself burst into tears.

She fell back in her chair and stared at you with her eyes wide open. Her heart racing, she refused to understand.

- What? Who?

- When Edward realized that we were more than just friends, he told me that if we had sex once in a while, he wouldn't tell my parents. This went on for a few months and stopped when he met a girl. At that point, I had to promise not to talk about his relationship with this girl and to continue to show my face in public with him if I didn't want him to say anything.

- But... no, no, no, you're talking nonsense! I would have seen if you were pregnant!

- I was in denial, Caitlin, the night of our fight, what I thought were stomach pains were actually contractions. I thought I was going to die. The night you left, I gave birth on the carpet in my room.

- It was our dream," she said weakly, completely shaken by the news.

- I was afraid of losing you, I thought I was doing the right thing. I went too far, I know. I was terrified, unable to touch the baby, then when they put him in my arms... I don't know, I wanted to try, I felt capable.

- No, no, it's not possible...she whispers.

- I'm sorry, Caity, I'm so sorry.

- And him? What did he say?

- His parents wanted the baby back, I refused, we haven't heard from him since...

- I don't know what to say...I'm so hurt...so confused....I feel sorry for you, but I'm so angry that you left me out, I could have protected you....

- I don't want to lose you, Caitlin.

- I need some air, let me go, let me think...

She hurried out of the restaurant, looking completely disturbed.

You watched her outside the transparent storefront as she cradled her head in her hands, paced back and forth, and finally walked to her car.

You didn't hear from her that day, despite the message you sent, and you haven't heard from her in the days since.

This hurts you tremendously; you feel responsible and monstrous. Seeing her like that literally tore your heart out. But the truth is, you didn't really have time to think about it. Your days were now filled with cries, bottles, naps, diapers... not to mention appointments with the pediatrician or the nurse who came to give you advice.

Despite all the sadness and guilt, you had to keep a straight face for him. For this baby who didn't ask for anything. You ruined everything with the love of your life, so you couldn't afford to ruin everything with him.

And yet, just as hope was fading, you received a message:

This unexpected news had just given you hope that all was not lost. A little salve to the heart did you good, and you even noticed that feeling a little better and believing again seemed to have an effect on your baby, as his crying spells diminished inexorably.

The next day, you went to the local Merch store to buy a baby-sized supporter's jersey and a pair of earplugs to protect his ears from the noise.

That evening, snuggled up to you in the baby carrier, he attended his first basketball game. While you and Caitlin rediscovered your chemistry. That night, as she sought your gaze for the first time in a long time, she found it and felt that wave of comfort and courage again. A sense of absolute invincibility.

That night, Caitlin and her team won the game hands down, and as the girls celebrated their victory in the middle of the court and the opponents began to leave the room, Caitlin approached you:

- Hello, little boy.

She hugs him, trembling. The two of them look at each other with stars in their eyes, as if surprised by each other's presence.

- His name is Donald, like our favorite music...

Donald awkwardly touches Caitlin's face with his chubby hands as she starts humming softly, tears rolling down her cheeks...

- Looks like I'm going to get a new jersey to sign...

Bye, bye Miss American Pie....🎶

---------------------------------------

sorry for the wait, I'm taking important exams at the moment!

So...did you like it? I'm seriously thinking about writing "extras" to this fiction, like little cute moments of life for Caitlin and you after these events, what do you think?

[mystiffox]

— the apple's falling from the tree

from Cross: The Star Sans by @overflowofcrows

star!cross makes me incredibly ill with the tragic found family vibes ... (lays on the floor)

also have some doodles too (slight spoilers on the fic's lore below! to explain some of my thoughts on clothes n stuff)

does Cross have a star necklace in the fic? no, probably not. did i show off about my thoughts on a star necklace to Simple anyway? yes, yes i did. anyway idc where u think the necklace is from (whether its a gift from dream or a remold of his broken heart necklace, who knows atp) now ONTO THE GANG (+ Error and Fresh)

to preface this: im mostly assuming for most of the lore beyond the crumbs given to me. so, i'd imagine that when the fight ended with the gang losing, Dream and Ink immediately jailed them up. they both seem keen on keeping the gang alive, so they probably would've tried to help them with anything to make sure of it- that is, if any of the gang would even accept it in the first place.

i'm making a small guess that if there were any wounds, they used what they had to take care of it, aka ripping out parts of their own clothing to use as makeshift bandages. dream might've gave them some supplies (out of pity.. or something) but whether that was not enough or not used, i won't know

even if it was enough, there's still the factor of inevitable outburst/breakdowns from any of the prisoners. i'd imagine it'd be so hard to calm any of them down because the gang were too used to being close together that using touch became the usual grounding method— so putting a barrier between them makes it infintely harder for everyone.

i think Nightmare doesn't use his jacket anymore. it probably feels like shit/too itchy and ragged to wear and reminds him of a past he wishes he could forget. (he must feel so helpless seeing all his boys suffer after taking care of them for so long... like a lost father trying his best and seeing how much he's failing at the same time.. man.)

Dust is almost always wrapped in a blanket, the hoodie completely zipped up as if he was trying to hide in it, keeping himself as small as possible (knowing his own breakdowns are the biggest And loudest)

Horror is probably yanked back to the memories of when he was back in his home au, quietly starving and losing all the progress he had with the gang.. trying to press himself against the barriers in hopes that maybe he can feel the others on the other side of it.. (one of his outbursts would be why he ripped off the sleeves of his jacket id assume)

Killer too.. unable to get to anyone and just. with his soul going haywire sometimes, having no available output that he's forced to ride it out on his own And in front of everyone.. yeah, you get the gist for those three

Error's a mess of threads- picks at his clothes and sews em back up, just to have a reason to move his hands. he's not too worried i'd say- it's a little reminiscent of the antivoid, and he's experienced insanity already (not to say it doesn't tug at his own soul-strings to see it happen to everyone else)

Fresh might be the "cleanest" out of everyone, with barely any visible tears, but i have a good feeling his body language is different. maybe the cap is now worn correctly. maybe he took off his jacket. he's tense. his guard is up. because a parasite would never want to be locked up in one place, right?

god.

God.

they make me so sick (message is mine btw)

[monstersflashlight]

I’m in the same boat, being asexual, does it feel weird to you to write these stories? I am asexual and I don’t want to have sex physically, but I’m not disgusted by reading about it or talking about it because I understand how other people feel about it. Does that make sense? Sometimes it just feels like I have imposter syndrome about myself, but I don’t have anyone else in my life I can talk to about that kind of stuff. 

Hi anon! I get what you say perfectly, it took me a long time to be able to say I'm asexual because I looooooove smut, writing and reading, but I don't really see myself doing any of that. Nor I feel compelled to do it, so it was very weird when I started questioning, but that's okay. You aren't less asexual just because you like to read smut, or write smut. You aren't less asexual if you decide to have sex, or don't. You are asexual either way. There's this internet discourse about asexuals being mostly sex-adverse and there's ppl like that, for sure, but there's also a bunch of us who really like sex, even if it's not in a conventional allosexual way. I'm glad you find me and my page a safe space to express these insecurities, it makes my heart all warm because we all need that safe space to ask and share experiences and if you don't have it in your everyday life, don't worry, here you'll be understood and appreciated. But yeah, you ARE asexual even if you like smut, it's completely okay. 😊 Feel free to send more anons or send me a DM if you are feeling the impostor syndrome again, it can be very rough to deal with alone. 🥰