#but duh her being like ‘SHE ASKED FOR NO PICKLES!’

[mariusroyale]

not that i dislike Zoe or anything but it rlly did feel like asstruck just gave up with Chloe and was like FINE HERES A BEE BOURGEOIS

but it’s like. we HAD a BEE BOURGEOIS. AND HER REDEMPTION WAS DEVELOPING. AND THEY JUST WENT NOWHERE WITH IT AND IN S4 AND S5 SHES JUST THE SAME

SO WHATS THE POINT

[confinesofmy]

my special talent is talking on the phone for 40 minutes and getting really, really pissed off

[maplesyrupsainz]

˖⁺｡˚⋆˙just say yes | CS55˖⁺｡˚⋆˙

pairing: father!carlos sainz x y/n faceless reader (she/her)

genre: social media au, established relationship

warnings: so much fluff 0 angst just lovey dovey cuteness & fun ! idek if there's much of a plot tbh lol

summary: in which you, your boyfriend and your daughter are the target of everyone's jealousy & you bask in it 😊

a/n: hiii i luv this request so cute & i havent done any carlos fics yet!! i love it he's soo beautiful fr! i've done the baby faceless tbh i felt a bit weird looking for pics hahahah anyway hope u like it 😊😊

request!!!: Can you do like a smau where carlos has a daughter and it's just fluffy as HELL !! And ofc we need lando and charles being goofy in the comments!

fc: various blonde girls from pinterest

my masterlist

instagram ->

carlossainz55

liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername, and 682,674

carlossainz55 vacationing with my girls

view all 11,356 comments

yourusername im soo lucky

carlossainz55 that's me actually. i love you

yourusername i love u!! sm more

landonorris you guys are always rubbing your perfect lives into our faces it has to stop

charles_leclerc i agree it is too much now

yourusername maybe if either of you could keep a girlfriend you could be like us

landonorris cant commit

carlossainz lando you need to grow up

charles_leclerc leave him alone he's a baby

yourusername i prefer the term pussy 🤷‍♀️

landonorris y/n i thought we were friends

yourusername we are it's called tough love

carlossainz55 sorry lando but she's right

user1 i missed carlando interactions

user2 me too so happy to see the carlando domestics continuing through instagram comments

user3 even funnier with y/n involved she's literally just an extension of carlos i love it

user4 best couple in the world

user5 only couple in the world more like

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 218,426 others

yourusername he wont even put the ferrari merch down in the off season

view all 4,189 comments

yourbff omg baby in ur sunglasses she's fr a mini u 😭😭

yourusername i know, i've never felt love like it 🥹

carlossainz55 me when i look at you

yourbff take your sickly sweetness out of my replies 🥲

user6 i love how all their friends are jealous of them too😭😭 it's not just us

charles_leclerc he's dedicated 😊

carlossainz55 thanks for being on my side charles 🙏

yourusername ur biased

yourusername gosh why are f1 drivers so annoying

landonorris i know you're not talking about me

danielricciardo or me

maxverstappen1 or me

yourusername well i actually wasnt but now i am

oscarpiastri me?

yourusername no never you oscar my fav rookie

yourbff

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, and 121,376 others

yourbff babysitting duties

tagged: yourusername, carlossainz55

view all 2,893 comments

carlossainz55 am i in trouble in that pic of us

yourbff she was explaining to u that u brought the wrong pickles home for her

carlossainz55 so yes then

landonorris wtf is the wrong pickles a pickle is a pickle

yourusername shutup little lando you dont understand me

charles_leclerc well duh ur a woman his pea brain cannot comprehend women

yourusername ur one to talk!

landonorris 🤐🤐🤐

yourusername ur her favourite aunt!!

yourbff @.yoursister told you so!

yoursister wow that hurt y/n

yourusername no wait

twitter ->

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, scuderiaferrari, and 302,748 others

yourusername happy first race of the season i love my boys so much

view all 8,883 comments

scuderiaferrari ❤️❤️

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55

user11 omg i love her

user12 this is the cutest post ever

charles_leclerc omg y/n being nice to me

yourusername it's the hormones and ur cute face getting to me ur soo pookie

charles_leclerc what is pookie

oscarpiastri dont ask

yourusername it means i love u 😊

carlossainz55 we are all so lucky to be subjects of y/n's affections so don't question it ok?

user13 omg carlos is so down bad lol it's adorable

landonorris come visit us too we miss you y/n

yourusername well i might. can i squish ur cheeks?

landonorris i'll think about it

yourusername im not coming till i have a yes for sure

yourusername posted a story

liked by yourbff, scuderiaferrari, and 121,847 others

user14 CHILDREN?? PLURAL??

user15 yes y/n we get it ur the luckiest girl alive

yourbff purrrrr

yourusername LOL??

landonorris share him? 🥹🥹🥹

yourusername not a day in my life

yourusername now let me come squish ur cheeks. charles let me do it

landonorris ok fine.

yourusername YAYYY

user16 most gorgeous man alive fr

yourusername posted a story

liked by carlossainz55, danielricciardo, and 98,183 others

carlossainz55 come back here

carlossainz55 please come back we miss you

charles_leclerc not you sneaking off. is carlos annoying you too??

yourusername you are too mean to that boy!!!!

mclaren you can stay with us!

yourusername poachers!! im much too loyal

user17 omg lol im obsessed

user18 SOO CUTE

f1wags

liked by carlossainz55, user6, and 73,294 others

f1wags carlos after the race with his longterm girlfriend y/n y/l/n today 🥹

tagged: carlossainz55, yourusername

view all 3,935 comments

user19 she needs a ring asap

user20 r how long have they been together now??

user21 like 8 years lol

user22 carlos liked 🥹🥹

user23 they r so personal to me

user24 do u think they know how much everyone loves them & is jealous of them

user25 absolutely & they love it lol

user26 if they ever break up im done with love

user27 idk who's luckier her or him

user28 they're the definition of soulmates

user29 the world will stop on their wedding day fr

carlossainz55

liked by yourusername, yoursister, and 728,193 others

carlossainz55 my perfect family

view all 13,438 comments

user30 stop it 😭😭😭

yourusername how did we create somebody so gorgeous😭

landonorris not you asking this as if you both aren't the most conventionally gorgeous people to ever exist

yourusername HAHAH shutup lando you are always slithering around to ruin our sincere moments

landonorris SLITHERING?!

user31 omg slithering 😭😭😭??

user32 lol at lando's comments he's like us

charles_leclerc let me babysit soon

yourbff why you coming for my job

carlossainz55 dont fight over my child

yoursister miss you guys!!

carlossainz55 we will have to come visit soon

yourusername ❤️❤️❤️

user33 put a ring on it carlos

liked by yourusername

twitter ->

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, yourbff, and 231,023 others

yourusername night off from baby

view all 6,173 comments

yourbff everyone in the world is in love with you

carlossainz55 right well they need to back off

yourusername tehehe

user37 wow she's unreal

user38 wifeee

carlossainz55 you are so beautiful

yourusername 🥹🥹🥹 i love u

carlossainz55 i love you

landonorris Y/N?? YOU DIDNT INVITE ME??

yourusername ...girls night

landonorris BUT YOU ALWAYS SAY IM ONE OF THE GIRLS

charles_leclerc i wasn't invited either mate

yourusername im so sorry. you guys are grown men though

landonorris no im one of the girls

user39 one of the girls 💀

user40 i love lando & y/n's friendship so bad

carlossainz55

liked by yoursister, yourusername, and 733,984 others

carlossainz55 our week off so far

view all 17,293 comments

user41 i want her

user42 join the club

charles_leclerc is y/n available for brunch tomorrow

carlossainz55 yes

yourusername i am?

charles_leclerc that is fantastic y/n we will pick you up at 11am

yourusername we?

charles_leclerc yes!! see you then

yourusername ?? WHAT

yourbff aww i love my y/n

carlossainz55 yours?

yourbff yes she is mine! tyvm carlos

yourusername hahahahaha

yourusername i love u both

messages ->

instagram ->

yourusername posted stories

liked by carlossainz55, danielricciardo, and 334,756 others

yourbff pretty pretty girl

yourusername yup

carlossainz55 i told you you'd enjoy yourself 😊

yourusername yup

user43 omg the brunch with charles?

user44 so effortlessly cool

user45 looks delicious tbh. you not the food

messages ->

instagram ->

yourusername posted a story

liked by carlossainz55, yourbff, and 123,284 others

user46 brunch & then the beach??

user47 hmmmm

user48 wuu2

user49 charles forcing her to brunch & then this???

carlossainz55 posted a story

liked by yoursister, landonorris, and 892,293 others

yourbff 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

user50 MY PARENTS

yoursister AHHH!!!!!

landonorris heeheehee

charles_leclerc ur welcome mate

user51 OMG FINALLY

user52 OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

user53 OMG IT'S REAL!!!!

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, and 792,673 others

yourusername luckiest girl alive

tagged: carlossainz55

landonorris congratulations parents

yourusername aww love u our little lando

charles_leclerc congratulations beauties

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55

yourbff my gorgeous girl with her beautiful daughter and some guy

yoursister the most beautiful amazing woman you've ever seen and then.....carlos

yourusername mean girls!!

carlossainz55 no they're right perhaps?

user54 LOL barbie & ken vibes

danielricciardo CONGRATULATIONSSSS 🥳

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55

lewishamilton congratulations ❤️

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55

user55 😭 so happy for them

user56 im obsessed with them.

user57 best couple on the grid period

user58 the most beautiful family ever. SO JEALOUS!!!

THE END ❤️

[hopelesslyromanticshark]

⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚ A New Brother?!

content: leo valdez x daughter of poseidon! reader fic (ft. my baby boy tyson) warning: i wanna say none but i dont trust myself, language probs author's note: okay okay so this one was the first winner!! the rest will follow in order with how many votes they got and such. but first LETS PUT A LITTLE RESPECT ON TYSONS NAME YALL THAT'S MY SON OF POSEIDON FR FR HES JUST A LITTLE GUY I CANT-

“dude! dude! dude!” y/n called as she ran from the big house toward percy, who was sitting on the steps outside of cabin three with annabeth, both of them looking up at her yells.

“bro! bro! bro!” percy called back with a laugh, sharing a look with annabeth, who shook her head at the two siblings as she went back to her architectural sketches for something.

“i’ve got news!” y/n cheers, standing before percy with her hands pulled up to her chest and an unbeatable smile on her lips. percy motioned for her to go on, looking at her suspiciously.

“my favorite brother will be joining us at camp for the next three days,” y/n announced, proudly, causing percy to jump up to his feet too.

“no way! what?” he cheered, the two of them soon jumping in a circle. annabeth laughed at them, getting joy from their joy. leo had walked over at some point, looking at the children of poseidon with concern. annabeth waved him over to sit next to her, giving them the perfect view of the excited teens.

“what did i miss?” leo questioned, unable to take his eyes off the pair but turning his head towards annabeth.

“tyson, their brother, is coming to stay at camp for a few days. they don’t see him very often because he works with the cyclops with their father, so they tend to get a bit excited,” annabeth explained with a shrug. leo nodded, having already been told about tyson by y/n. she loved to rave about him, proudly showing the picture of him she kept in her cabin at any needed moment.

“i call dibs on snack duty! you didn’t even get anything good last time,” y/n insisted, pointing at percy as they sat down next to their respective significant others, both a little out of breath and sweaty, but smiling nonetheless.

“whatever. tyson liked those pickle chips,” percy huffed, jokingly rolling his eyes.

“yeah, but i did not like the smell of your guys' breath,” y/n replied, scrunching her face up, which earned her a laugh.

“okay, okay, fair. so i'm on movie duty then?” percy questioned and y/n nodded.

“yes, cause tyson’s on fort duty, duh,” answered y/n before she spun in leo’s arms and looked up at him, who looked down at her with a raised brow and a smile

“hi, hey,” she rapidly shot out before pressing her lips against his and promptly pulling back.

“gross!” percy called, earning him an elbow against his rib from annabeth.

“please, i was tortured by you two for like five summers, i’ve earned my dues,” y/n replied, squinting at the two with a glare.

“fair enough.”

tyson showed up a few days later, a large dopey smile on his face as he waved the hippocampus that gave him a ride away. y/n and percy were, obviously, the first to greet him and get him settled in their cabin. most of the older campers knew tyson or at least knew of him, so they weren’t really too phased by the cyclops being at camp. it was the younger ones who took a little more time, but with how sweet tyson was it really wasn’t a problem. leo had gotten caught up in the forges, annabeth having asked him if he could roadtest something for her, which sent him down a rabbit hole of trying to figure it out.

“leo?!” y/n’s voice called through the forge, leo’s eyes moving from the twisted metal in front of him to the girl standing in the doorway of the forge, along with a bulkier and taller figure.

“hey, honey. give me a minute, yeah?” he called as both of his hands were occupied. he didn’t hear anything in response but he trusted that she was probably just showing tyson some of the new projects or something like that. after a bit, leo walked up, shoving his goggles up and dusting his hands off on his once white shirt.

“leo, this is tyson, my brother. tyson, this is leo, my boyfriend,” y/n introduced, gesturing between the two. leo held his hand out to the cyclops, smiling widely.

“hey, man, nice to meet you. y/ns, here, loves to rave about you,” mused leo before he was promptly pulled into a bone crushing huge.

“right, sorry, tyson’s a hugger,” y/n winced, forgetting to mention that to leo, who groaned as he was let go. he shot a look at the girl, who giggled quietly behind her hand.

“a new brother! very exciting, sister, and he can build things!” tyson cheered, happily nodding his head. leo blushed at the insinuation and y/n coughed, opening her mouth to correct him.

“oh, tyson, he’s not- we’re not- he’s just my boyfriend. when…when we get married, he’d be your brother,” y/n tried to explain, her voice catching on the word ‘when.’ then she shared a look with leo, which just solidified her ‘when’ and not ‘if.’

“oh,” tyson frowned, his eyebrows furrowing and leo had a feeling tears would be next.

“y/n mentioned you work in forges, right? come on, i’ll show you what i’m working on, could use some help,” leo redirected, easily, nodding his head back towards the forges. tyson’s eye lit up and he looked over at y/n for permission, but she was looking at leo with a melty and soft look in her eyes.

"sister?"

“hmm? oh, yeah, you’re good, tyson. just bring him back to percy and i before dinner, okay, lee?” y/n asked and leo gave her a salute, which tyson mimicked with a little laugh. y/n watched them go, her heart full of love and a blinding smile on her face.

right before dinner, percy and y/n were making their way towards the forge to pick up tyson, but tyson came running out of the forge in excitement, something clasped safety in his large hands. the siblings shared a look as leo trailed after him.

“percy! y/n! look!” he proudly cheered, stopping before the two and unfurling his hands to reveal a small metallic horse sculpture. he squealed in excitement on seeing it again.

“wow! super cool, tyson!” percy cheered, clapping the cyclops on the back.

“you make that yourself or did leo?” y/n jumped in, beaming a smile between her boyfriend and little brother.

"oh, all tyson. i only helped here and there," leo mused, holding his hands up with a wide smile and a wink to you and percy.

"yup. all me," tyson echoed, clearly having grown fond of leo in the past few hours.

"good job, buddy! wanna go show annie?" percy offered with a wide smirk, which had tyson nodding his head and following after his brother. you stayed behind with leo, watching your siblings go as leo wrapped his arms around your waist and rested his head on your shoulder.

"thank you. for hanging out with him today," you whispered and you could feel leo shrug as he pressed a kiss to your shirt clad shoulder.

"course. he's a good guy and handy in the forges. being fireproof tends to be helpful," leo replied and you giggled, turning to make eye contact with him.

"and you'd know all about that, huh?" you taunted and leo rolled his eyes, releasing his hands from you, which just caused you to laugh harder.

"whatever. and to think, i made you a present!" huffed the son of hephaestus, turning his nose up at the girl.

"ooo, what'd ya make?" she questioned, poking at his side with her fingers.

"no. mean girlfriend's don't get gifts," added leo, trying to dodge the attack of her fingers the best he could.

"c'mon, don't be that way, pretty boy," you pouted, batting your eyes at him in a way that had leo instantly folding, reaching back into his tool belt with a tiny shake of his head.

"that's an abuse of power," he stated before presenting you with a metal lily, delicately sculpted and stretched out of metal. and you were instantly swooning, gently caressing it with your fingers before darting your wide eyes up to him.

"only the longest lasting flowers for my girl," leo added, winking with a smirk. you rolled your eyes but clutched the flower to your chest like it was your child.

"y/n! stop flirting and come help with the snacks!" percy called, giving you a pointed look and setting a hand against his hip like a mother. you huffed at him, sticking your tongue out before turning to leo and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"you're the sweetest boy, valdez," you whispered to the skin of his cheek before racing off, shouts that you'll make it to cabin three first, which sent both of your brothers barreling after you. leo watched this with a smile and a blush slowly rising to where your lips had been.

yeah, he was going to marry this girl. tyson'd throw a fit if he didn't. and he just couldn't have that, could he?

[elizabethsaige]

been reading a lot of Stobin headcanons and wanted to share my own because I cannot stop thinking about SteveandRobin

these are just some, I do have many more

enjoy !

- their entire relationship is essentially Robin calling Steve things like “dingus” and “idiot” and just being such a menace to him, but the second anyone else says anything slightly mean to him, she is ripping them a new one so fast, ready to lay them out the second they open their mouths

- she frequently disciplines Dustin, Mike, and Max any time they are rude to Steve, even if it’s a joke (and by discipline, I mean telling them “hey shut the fuck up, i’m the only one thats allowed to be mean to him”)

- Robin “he asked for no pickles” and Steve “Robin, it’s fine”

- the first time Robin goes on a date with a girl, Steve is sitting by the phone waiting for Robin to call and give him every single detail

- Steve gets so warm and fuzzy inside any time he looks at Robin when she doesn’t know he’s looking because he just loves her so much it hurts

- when Robin finally notices, she gives him a weird look and says, “what the fuck are you looking at dingus?”

- (Robin looks at him the same way, he just doesn’t know it)

- Robin and Steve’s children together are Max and Will, but Steve’s children-from-another-marriage are Dustin, Erica, and El and Robin’s are Lucas and Mike

- speaking of Mike, he is like obsessed with Robin. he thinks she’s the coolest person ever. any time they hang out in the group, Mike always wants to be in her conversations or wants her to join in on any games the kids are playing, and he LOVES when she roasts people in other languages, he asks her to teach him the words every time

- every time Robin sleeps at Steve’s house, he judges him for the ugly wallpaper and ugly matching drapes in his bedroom and begs him to change it

- sometimes Steve really doubts his place in the group, worrying that he isn’t important to anyone and is just used as a babysitter or a ride, and on days like this, Robin will hold him and run her hands through his hair and tell him every reason why everyone in The Party loves him and just how important he is, especially to her

- Steve is Stevie and Robin is Robbie, but also Steve is Steven and Robin is Rob, and sometimes Steve is Evie and Robin is Robert, but most of the time Steve is Dingus and Robin is Birdie

- Joyce and Hopper were the last to find out that they are both queer and not dating each other. but before they found out, Joyce gave Steve the ‘you better not hurt her’ talk because, well, she knew his old reputation and she figured it was necessary. and Hopper gave Robin the ‘i know he had a reputation but he’s my son and he’s actually a good guy now’ talk (not realizing that Robin already knew all of this because duh they’re best friends) and then Robin and Steve told each other what was said to them and laughed their heads off

- they throw the absolute best birthday parties together for the kids. they want them to feel so special and so loved on their birthdays because both Steve and Robin dislike their birthdays and never really felt special during any of them as kids

- when Robin is reading and she’s with Steve, she reads out loud so Steve can join in on the story even if he doesn’t always understand what’s going on if she’s halfway through a book (asks many questions and Robin pretends to be annoyed about having to answer them but does anyway

- when Steve doesn’t understand something, Robin is so kind and gentle in explaining it to him and making sure he doesn’t feel dumb (unless she’s overwhelmed, then she kind of gets an attitude about it)

- Robin can actually sing and Steve isn’t the first person to find out (Nancy is - on accident) and they get into a really big fight about it because Steve feels betrayed and it ends with Robin confessing how self conscious about it she is so she doesn’t let other people hear her

[hey-haven]

Post your G3 shipping chart! Do it do it do it

Haven’t had time to draw cause of the holidays but I’ll post one when I can. Meanwhile I’ll just list what I do ship in Monster High in general

Cleo x Clawdeen: Always the OTP, always the ghoulfriends, G3 only made me ship it more

Draculaura x Manny: giant nerd x tiny nerd with a one sided rivalry turned lovers perhaps? They’d have library dates for sure. Also minor “he asked for no pickles” vibes.

Draculaura x Lagoona: The dashing fish knight and her daring vampire princess! Always there to rescue each other from trouble! (Also the the small moment where Draculaura helped to warm Lagoona up when she was cold. So sweet so cute)

Frankie x Deuce: Honestly I think the small moment they had in the picture day episode was genuinely very sweet. I definitely think Deuce can help Frankie feel more comfortable in their identity and explore the joys of life together.

Deuce x Jackson: …Duh. Honestly Deuce highkey being a dork in G3 and my Jackson being the morally grey mad scientist only makes me ship them more. Their dates boil down to Deuce asking “Is this legal?” And Jackson saying “yes” like a liar and Deuce goes along with it without any more questions.

Toralei x Jackson: Kinda cheating cause I genuinely love this idea of Toralei having this massive crush on Jackson all through high school and then becoming unlikely besties senior year. I guess they’re my BrOTP more than anything. (also this is G1 Toralei not G3 Toralei. We don’t interact with British people/lh)

Heath x Abbey: I liked them in G1 but I adore them in G3. Having Heath be enamored with a girl who’s taller and bigger than him is genuinely nice cause we never really see that in media. Also he literally worships the ground she walks on. Deadass Gomez levels of “I love my wife” energy.

I have more but these are the ships that tickle my brain with happy energy

[sapphanimates]

Okay, so I kinda just want to talk about an au idea I've been tossing around a bit....

superhero teen drama at high school, but sonic

sometimes i hate how my brain sometimes says "oh that's cool, but what if it had anthropomorphic hedgehogs in it?"

So uh, here we go,

take a bunch of characters from the games, give them 'normal person names', and just stick em in high school is the basic premise, but I do have some roles already figured out for the most part. (below cut)

subject to change (duh)

Nicholas Chaos "Sonic" - blue dude with tude. casual jock, troublemaker, and not that great of a student but still has a good group of friends. has enhanced speed (of course), either natural or gifted through a run-in with chaos energy

Sally Acorn "Tiara" - mysterious exchange student. backstory relating to how Robotnik managed to take over her home from the inside, and how she escaped. might be a princess? she calls together all the different gifted students together to form a team of superheroes. she's the tech wiz and behind the scenes guy.

N.I.C.O.L.E - the A.I. that helps Tiara run everything behind the scenes. she can manage communication, location data, and even activate their disguises. I was also thinking that every hero could have their own personal Nicole assistant, like Knuckles' would look like Chaos, Shadow's like Maria, etc. but idk.

Knuckles Equivalent who I haven't named yet - I'm think of making this a Sol Emerald Zone, meaning he would have Fire related abilities and would be of Infernus Tribe decent. He and Mighty are boyfriends.

Kit Prower "Kitsune" - tails but a girl and also evil. she would hide her tails and her true wild colors during school, out of fear of ridicule. emo schoolgirl bookworm vibes from her civilian form. she's very intelligent, as expected. I want her to team up with Robotnik at some point to create Shadow :]

Dr. Julian Robotnik - politcian/teacher/random guy? idk yet. he's smart and also is eggman. can't say much.

Android Shadow - the last Metal Sonic model, and most successful of them. A creative collaboration between Kitsune and Robotnik. He has the ability to disguise himself like a normal hedgehog. He joins the heroes as a spy for Robotnik before changing sides, in which Robotnik destroys him, breaking Kit's heart.

Mighty and Ray - they would be half brothers in this au, with Mighty being full armadillo, whilst Ray is half flying squirrel, half armadillo. they have a close bond. not sure if they would be connected to the heroes outside of Knux and Mighty's relationship.

Amy, Rouge, and Cream - these three would be a team. Amy has a crush on Sonic's superhero ego, but when she asks to join their team, he denies her with the excuse that she's too young. So she gathers her two closest friends and makes a new team. Amy's hero name would be Rosie the Rascal.

other people:

- Jules and Bernadette would be Sonic's parents here.

- Sally's dad. probably a mix of King Acorn and King Dodonpa

- various school teachers; Pickle, Big maybe?

And on an unrelated note, it's artstyle would likely be similar to the Vagabond Hedgehog AU by @tatck because I think it looks really cool and would fit well.

Aaaanyways, that's it for now I guess. Byeee!

[blubikbeneeninktvis]

INTERVIEW: SHIVER, FRYE, AND BIG MAN OF DEEP CUT WILL STEAL YOUR HEART

Whether you’re tuning in to the Anarchy Splatcast or boppin’ to the beat during a Splatfest, sooner or later you’ll catch sight of Deep Cut. This tricky trio—composed of Shiver, Frye, and Big Man—has taken the Splatlands by storm. We sat down with the group for an ink-lightening chat about how they came together, how they wrote their hit anthem “Anarchy Rainbow,” and more.

Who is Deep Cut?

A unit based in the Splatlands composed of Shiver, Frye, and Big Man. Each of their unique voices and dances become a trinity, engulfing those who see it into whirling waves of chaos. After being selected as the hosts of Anarchy Splatcast, they have been gaining popularity among the younger generation.

The three of you have really settled in as hosts of the Anarchy Splatcast, haven’t you?

Shiver: Well, thank you! We couldn’t have done it without our adoring fans.

Frye: Hah! If you ask me, Shiver and Big Man could still loosen up a bit. Improv some, y’know?

Big Man: Ay… (Frye, that isn’t in the script…)

I know you all have a lot of history together. Didn’t your families get together frequently when you were growing up? Have you all been friends since childhood?

Big Man: Ay. Ay? Ay. (I wouldn’t say friends. Friendly? We knew each other. We knew OF each other.)

Shiver: It’s true. We sort of just said “hi” in passing.

Frye: I don’t know about y’all, but I was WAY too busy with dance lessons and eel training and stuff like that to have, like, real friends.

Shiver: But you used to sneak out all the time!

Huh! I guess my research failed me. I thought you were all lifelong friends.

Frye: Well, we did start to become close around middle school or so. Right?

Shiver: Yeah, that’s right. Frye and I were in the same class, and I could tell that she was a little bit wild, a little bit reckless. I sort of looked after her.

Frye: Y-you? Looked after ME? If anything, it was the other way around!

Well, at some point, you must have started to mesh.

Frye: Oh yeah. We bonded over music. We used to literally sing from the school rooftop!

Shiver: Right! We used to belt out Calamari Inkantation from up there. You know that one, don’t you? It goes, "Buh, duh-dee, dah-dee, buh-duh-dah-dee-dah...”

Frye: C’mon, everyone knows that one. But yeah, that’s when we realized that a cappella wasn’t going to cut it.

Shiver: We knew Big Man a little bit, and I heard he was good on piano. So we asked him to see what he could do with the track.

Big Man: Ay. Ay! (I was so nervous. I thought you wanted to fight me, or something!)

Shiver: What?!

Big Man: Ay! (I’m nervous again!)

Well, you were “discovered” a few years later, and the rest is history. Now you’re the face of Splatfests in Splatsville!

Frye: We’re the face of Splatfests AND banditing. If there’s loot to be looted, we’ll loot it!

Sorry—what’s this “loot” you speak of?

Big Man: Ay. (Oh, she’s obsessed with this particular card game. She has to have all the cards.)

Shiver: Um, this interview is going off the rails. Can we refocus?

Of course—my apologies. Let me ask you about the song Anarchy Rainbow. You performed it at a recent Splatfest, didn’t you? Big Man, I know you do a lot of composition. Was that one that you wrote?

Big Man: Ay! Ay. (Actually, the inspiration for that song came from Frye! We were eating at a food cart when she looked up, mouth FULL of okonomiyaki, and shouted, “I’m a genius!”)

Frye: Yep! I figured out that if you stack the okonomiyaki and put the pickles on top—

Big Man: Ay! Ay! (No, not the part about the okonomiyaki stack! The idea you had for combining the traditional school songs and dances into something new!)

Frye: I’m getting there! Yeesh!

I think I get it! You stacked the different types of music together like okonomiyaki, and the different “flavors” combined to make something new and delicious. It’s a wonderful concept, but was it challenging to execute?

Big Man: Ay! Ay. (It was! Each school uses different instrumentation and techniques. Bringing them together into a cohesive sound took about six weeks or so.)

Shiver: You should’ve seen Big Man at the end. Dried up like an uncooked lasagna noodle.

Big Man: Ay! (You’re the one who sent me back to the drawing board seven times!)

Shiver: Well, that’s what made it good, right? Your music and lyrics may have had a little bit to do with it as well.

Frye: Don’t forget the demo that Big Man made! I can’t believe he could still sing like that when he was all dried out.

Big Man recorded the demo?

Shiver: He did. But he knew that me and Frye would put our own spin on it in terms of singing.

Frye: Do I have to be the one to tell ‘em that I wrote the rap part and came up with the title?!

Now, Deep Cut is obviously one of a kind. But have you taken inspiration from any other artists out there today?

Big Man: Ay! Ay. (Of course! I’m a big fan of Front Roe—you can learn a lot from them. And C-Side has been making great music for a long time.)

Shiver: We even covered their big hit “Now or Never”!

Front Roe and C-Side... Yeah, I think I can hear the influence!

Big Man: Ay. Ay. (We listen to everything though. Right now I’m really into this one DJ from Inkopolis.)

Frye: Did I hear Inkopolis?

Big Man: Ay! (Eep!)

We’re almost out of time, but before we wrap up...what’s next for Deep Cut?

Big Man: Ay. Ay. (Well, we’re still trying to hype up the Anarchy Splatcast. I feel like we’re just getting started.)

Frye: I just want to write more anthems for Splatfests!

Shiver: They can’t all be anthems, Frye. Maybe we should write a ballad for everyone who participates. A battle ballad!

Frye: You heard her, Big Man. Get on it!

Big Man: Ay... (This is going to be due tomorrow, isn’t it...)

[hansolmates]

hoshi; vowels and veracity (m)

summary: after a blind date that makes you feel like a giddy teenager all over again, you’re forced to grow up and take a chance when you realize that special someone is your daughter’s kindergarten teacher. pairing: teacher!soonyoung x single mother!reader genre/warnings: fluffity fluff nuggets, humor, a lil bit of angst when yn panics, *steve rogers voice* language! alcohol, unprotected sex (wrap the pickle before u tickle), face sitting w/c: 5.2k a/n: i really have nothing to say about this but i’ve been thinking about going back to school all week so this manifested. enjoy a lil sexy but sweet hosh💕 

“Y-you,” another giggle and the press of wet lips to the sensitive spot of your neck, “stop, Soonyoung! I’m ticklish there!” 

You feel a pout imprint itself in the sweet spot between your ear and your jaw, and you sigh at the rumble of his lips against your skin, “But you taste so sweet, baby,” he croons, and you’re practically melting between the door with how much Soonyoung has pressed himself against you, all of himself. 

“What if I don’t wanna stop, pretty girl?” he husks against your soft skin, whispering things in your ear that aren’t for the faint of heart. In your haste to keep a firm grip, one hand goes to his clothes and the other nips at the undercut of his midnight black hair, “what if I just open the door right now and we slip right in, and then I slip right in you?” 

Your breath hitches and suddenly your core feels like a timebomb, ready to combust. 

Go on a date, Joshua says. He’s a sweet guy, Joshua says. He’s a friend of Joshua’s, so you know going into this blind date that at the very least, he wasn’t a serial killer. But what Joshua failed to tell you going into this was how much Kwon Soonyoung packed and how much of a temptor in disguise he is. 

“I really would love to invite you in,” it looks like it pains Soonyoung to admit this, as he presses his forehead to yours and the edge of his fingers dig into your crushed emerald velvet number, “but tomorrow’s the first day of work and I am not emotionally prepared. But, I do want to see you again. I had a great time.” 

The previous mood melting into the night sky, you reluctantly let go of the lapels of his tweed blazer. Unable to suppress your crestfallen smile you nod, “That’s fine,” you reply, inching away from him to send him a pointed look, “I wouldn’t have gone inside anyway. I don’t put out on the first date,” you cross your arms in an attempt to feign nonchalance.  

Which isn’t a lie, although if Soonyoung had asked you two minutes ago to come inside for a cup of tea, you wouldn’t have argued. He is just that tempting. Said date raises an eyebrow in response, tucking a strand of loose hair behind your ear at the defiance in your eyes. “Oh?” he echoes, “then what date do you put out?” 

“Date seven.” 

“Lucky seven,” he grins, “so if we go on a date every day this week by Friday we should be good to go. How do you feel about steak?” 

You slap his shoulder in his response, and the giggle that erupts from his lips in response has you feeling dizzy and giddy with excitement. Soonyoung has you feeling like a college freshman all over again, floating like Cloud 9 and drunk in anticipation. You peck one, two more kisses on his lips. He tastes like the peach champagne you shared and his own scent as he pulls you in for a much longer, much hotter kiss. 

“Good luck on your first day,” you mumble against his lips, vaguely remembering that he’s a teacher in a school nearby. 

“Mm, text me when you get home,” and with a final kiss to your forehead he unlocks his door, leaving you warm and full of heart-eyes on his front porch. 

The walk home, more like float home, has you feeling all parts exhausted and hopeful for the days to come. For the first time in a long time you feel young and unbridled, thrumming with excitement. Now you’re just playing with your phone, waiting to exchange goodnight texts. 

“Nari’s asleep,” when you walk into your shared apartment, you spot a sleepy Seungkwan on his laptop and sprawled across your couch. “How was it?” 

“It was reealllly nice,” you’re still a little wine tipsy, drunk on the taste of Merlot and a certain someone’s kisses, “he was really sweet, and surprisingly sexy.” 

“Did you get dicked down?” Seungkwan asks only the most important questions. 

You scoff, flopping down on the couch next to him, “As if, we have work in the morning.” 

“Speaking of work, are you sure you’re not able to drop off Nari to school tomorrow? It’s her first day of kindergarten.” 

“I can’t,” saying it feels absolutely awful, but a single mother has to work extra hard to keep her and her daughter happy. 

“It’s fine,” Seungkwan easily waves you off and runs a hand through his fluffy auburn hair, “her favorite Uncle is there, anyway.” 

“Hey,” you lightly punch his arm, “I’ve already talked Nari through it. I’m cooking a big breakfast tomorrow—chocolate chip pancakes, duh, and taking a million pictures before we have to part ways. I packed a little Kit-Kat for her lunch with a sweet note. When I come back in time for dinner I promised her pizza from her favorite parlor and she can tell me everything about her day.” 

“So, you’re bribing her with food.” 

“Sue me, it’s every parent’s weak spot.” 

Seungkwan stretches his arms, cradling you between his chest. You sigh into his clean linen scent, feeling sleepy. “Yeah, I’ve bribed her with my Switch once or twice,” he admits softly, eyes also drooping, “but you’re a great mother regardless. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of everything tomorrow.” 

“Thanks, Kwannie,” you sigh, feeling more at ease. 

Nari is the light of you and Seungkwan’s life. Five years ago, you promised yourself that if you were more than financially stable and still sick with baby fever, you would adopt. You didn’t want to find a romantic partner for the sole purpose of having a child, you could easily do that on your own. And that you did, you researched and visited foster homes off in the countryside. 

In a little town off the coast of the shore was where you met Nari, only six months old and full with cherub cheeks and eyes that sparkled like the moon and stars. You fell in love with her instantly. Fast forward five years later and she’s the reason you wake up every morning and work hard every day. Seungkwan being your best friend, also wanted rights as the godfather and therefore is also part of your perfect family picture. 

You and Seungkwan sleep warmly tonight, both excited to share yet another year of Nari’s milestones. 

“And then Mr. Kwon said I was an ‘ace’ with my vowels!” Nari has a string of cheese hanging from her chin, and you don’t bat an eye as you reach to pat it away with a napkin. 

“I wouldn’t expect any less, baby,” you coo, carding a hand through her hair so her bangs don’t get caught in her meal, “remember when mommy and Uncle Kwannie taught you the vowels this summer? We sang that song.” 

“Yes! I sang the same song and showed everyone how ‘ta do it,” your heart is swelling with pride, and you fight the urge to tear up because Seungkwan’s already showing signs of waterworks from his side of the table, “I read a book Mr. Kwon gave me today and he said he’s so impressed I read at a Level B.” 

You quirk your brows at the new jargon. You certainly don’t know what it means to be a Level B, but it makes Nari happy and that’s all that matters. Wiping the orange grease off her lips, you muse that you must get in contact with her teacher one of these days.

“What’s a Level B?” Seungkwan similarly looks stumped at the new vocabulary. 

“I don’t know!” Nari shrugs, but nevertheless her teacher’s attention has her glowing. 

You giggle, “I’m so happy for you, baby.” 

“I’m excited to go back tomorrow, I made a new friend! His name is Jeonghan and he helped me with my numbers today. He called my bows cute.” 

“Cute?” Seungkwan perks up from his stupor, “of course you’re cute, Nari. So cute that you’re too good for this Jeonghwan boy.” 

“Jeonghan, Uncle Kwannie,” she pouts when Seungkwan scoffs, in favor of shoving half a slice in his mouth. She turns to you, tugging on your blazer, “Mama, can I go watch TV now? I finished my homework and I wanna see the new Ladybug and Cat Noir!” 

“Of course,” you pull away her plate, gesturing for her to go to the living room. 

“Thank you mama,” and she’s bouncing off her seat, pushing her chair in and off to watch Miraculous Ladybug. 

You sigh, “They grow up so fast.” 

Seungkwan’s eyes widen at your age-old phrase, the words reminding him oddly of his parents when they used to talk down to him. “And here we are, aging twice as fast,” Seungkwan bemoans, already starting to feel the greasy food settle in his stomach. “We used to eat a whole pie! We could eat absolute garbage back in college and here I am weak at two slices—oh my god, am I having a ‘back in my day’ moment? We need to go out. I need to go out. I’ve been practicing consonants and vowels all day. I need a boyfriend,” he playfully narrows his eyes at you, “I need a boyfriend like yours, sweet and sexy.” 

“Sorry,” you stick out your tongue, “but he’s mine.” 

Perfect timing, Soonyoung’s name pops up on your phone. You two have been texting sporadically throughout the day, making plans for your next date. The two of you are going to watch a drive-in movie, a situation that screams teenage-back-of-the-truck-sex but the movie is a much anticipated favorite of yours and you genuinely want to watch it. 

Soonyoung is full of humor and laughs, getting you to smile and relax at the right times during work and always manages to keep you on your toes whenever he says something flirtatious. 

“Are you gonna introduce him to Nari?” 

You stop typing, and look up towards your beautiful little girl in the living room. Her hair is out of her pigtails, drooping tiredly like she is. Her cheek is pressed against her favorite plush cat, fighting for consciousness because she’s waiting for Marinette to save the day. Your heart swells with affection. 

“Dunno,” you shrug, trying not to think too hard about it, “we’re not that serious right now.” 

You’re absolutely winded. You finished work early today, due to the fact that came in early so you could clock out and pick Nari up from school. Despite the fact that Nari says it’s okay for you not to pick her up, you can’t allow it and you want to be the one who she runs into when she comes out the door. 

“Who do you think she’s gonna hug first?” Seungkwan’s elbowing you, baiting you. “Because this morning she gave me a hug and three kisses before I dropped her off.” 

“Three?” you seethe in annoyance, “three kisses is our thing! Two on the cheek and one on the forehead!” 

The two of you slowly steep together, waiting for the colorful blue door to the kindergarten area to file out. The heel of your shoes are digging into the grass, probably making a needle-like  indentation in the dirt as you struggle not to seep into the lawn. You feel like you’re going to flop on your heels, wishing you could go run back into the car and find your flip-flops from last month’s beach trip. But before you could debate on the run the bell rings, and you’re on livewire when you see the students start to file out. 

Your smile grows ten-fold when you see Nari’s jaw drop in surprise, seeing you waiting for her. She fists whatever is in her hands in surprise, breaking into the cutest smile as she screams, “mama!” 

And you’re ready to hold your arms out and throw her around in circles, until you see who follows right behind her. 

Kwon Soonyoung is Nari’s kindergarten teacher. Kwon Soonyoung with his hair down and untextured, wearing a mint polo and looking nothing like the date you had the other night. He looks absolutely soft and so, you are weak. 

Kwon Soonyoung, the sexy deviant who sends you questionable texts and sends you funny puppy videos, is staring right at you and utterly confused when Nari rams straight into your hip. 

Momentarily distracted, you pepper your pretty daughter in kisses (all three of them, two cheeks and one forehead) and tell her how much you’ve missed her. Clearly she doesn’t miss you as much, as she’s waving around a picture she drew during playtime, one of her and Jeonghan in the sandbox. 

“Really, Nari,” Seungkwan mutters under his breath, shamelessly vocalizing his opinion on a five-year old, “can’t you choose a different friend?” 

“Seungkwan!” you chide, but he pointedly annoys you when Nari finally enters Seungkwan’s embrace. He takes extra time to cuddle her, obviously jealous that another boy has taken refuge in your little Nari’s heart. 

The moment is so sweet and simple you have no choice but to revel in it and take out your phone to snap a photo. 

“Mama!” she pops her head off of Seungkwan’s shoulder, “come meet Mr. Kwon!”

And she’s tugging your hand, only you’re much stronger and you stay firmly planted on the grass. Heck, you even sacrifice your shoes by digging your heels in for extra measure.Your eyes widen in panic, but Nari doesn’t notice because she’s paving a path of dirt with her lime green light-up sneakers, trying to get you to move. You nearly forgot your latest tryst is your daughter’s teacher, and you never told him you have a kid. 

But within seconds, there’s an audible slam and the three of you are shattered from your bubble. Turning to the noise the heavy navy door is now locked shut, all the students dismissed for the day. The crowd is gone. Soonyoung is gone. 

Seungkwan’s eyes dart between the closed door and you, the pieces clicking. His mouth forms a little ‘o’ and he nods in understanding. “He thinks I’m your baby daddy.” 

The two of you point out each other like the Spiderman meme. “He thinks you’re my baby daddy,” you echo, horror marrying your face. 

“Mama? What’s a baby daddy?” 

“Shh, Nari—” he picks up Nari in one swoop, mouthing a go to you as he leads her to the car. 

All alone on the grass, you panic as you watch your family grow smaller and smaller as they enter the parking lot. Soonyoung’s just behind that door, right? Looking left and right to assure no one is going to think you’re being that parent and harassing the teacher within the first week of school, you bound up the steps to knock on the door. Your knocks clang heavily, echoing against the building. 

Ten seconds pass. Nothing. 

You deflate, pulling out your phone to shoot Soonyoung a quick text. 

You: hey, can you come out for a bit so i can explain? Please

A minute passes. He leaves you on read. Defeated, you slump against the door. This day is really a whirlwind on your mental state. All you wanted today was some extra time off work, Nari’s three kisses, and maybe a goodnight text from Soonyoung if you were lucky. 

The door suddenly flips open, and you’re braced against someone’s hands. 

“Whoa, you okay?”

Your face crumples in relief when it’s Soonyoung that’s come out to respond to you. He’s bracing your weight by holding your arms between his hands, although keeping a respectable distance between the upper half of your bodies. It makes you a little upset, but you understand. Once you’re stable, he lets you go and leans away from you.

“Why are you waiting out here?” he asks pointedly, looking at you up and down. You seem terribly overdressed in your coral pinstripe suit, mismatching with Soonyoung’s apple sauce stains. 

“Why do you think I’m waiting out here?”

“And if I close the door again?” he retorts suddenly. 

“Then I’ll follow you home.” 

A beat passes, whatever expression he conveys on his face is practiced and primed. You have a terrible time trying to decipher his blankness. Working with kids probably does that to an adult. “Come in,” he says neutrally, and you wordlessly follow him into his classroom. 

The room is decorated beautifully, with rainbows and glitter. It’s also surprisingly organized, all the crayons in place and the play area free of stray toys. Your eyes instantly search for Nari’s desk, and a small smile fits on your face as you trace her handmade name tag. 

“Normally, I don’t let parents in my room until it’s Back to School Night,” Soonyoung says, leaning against his desk. It makes you terribly nervous, knowing the ball is in your court and he’s waiting for you to make a move. His carefree, easy going nature is nowhere to be found, and all you see is walls and a mean poker face. He pulls up the sleeves of his polo, exposing pale, strong arms. Your mouth waters a little (you can’t help it!) and you immediately reach for a bottle of water in your purse. “So, what is it you have to say?” 

“Seungkwan’s not my baby daddy,” you blurt, and you immediately blanch when Soonyoung’s eyes widen. “Wow uh. I didn’t mean to say it like that.” 

“But you did say it like that,” Soonyoung replies slowly, “no child just doesn’t give three kisses to someone who isn’t their father.” 

“I only called him my baby daddy because he said it first,” you grumble, almost childishly, “and Nari’s a baby, of course she’s going to give three kisses to anyone that feeds her and coddles her.” 

“It sounds like an excuse.” 

“It sounds like I’m freaking out because you keep talking back and forth like this!” you cry, slapping your hands against your thigh. You don’t have to look in a mirror to know that you’re quickly getting annoyed, your face morphing into a shade of embarrassment. You can’t tell if this is amusing him or this is a real interrogation. “Let me explain, Soonyoung!” 

He says your name slowly, deliberately. And then, “do you want to take a break in the Calm Down Corner?” 

“The—the what?” Soonyoung’s eyes flicker to a corner at the far end of the room. The radiator is decorated in a sky blue wallpaper, and there’s a yoga mat on the floor. There are chairs next to a desk filled with coloring pages, decorated with fairy lights. Filling three of the chairs are various stuffed animals, a tiger, a cat, and a panda, all dressed as doctors. It’s a child’s therapy corner. “You gotta be kidding me.” 

He raises a brow, and—is that a smile on his lips? “Then explain, why are you here?” 

“Because I think I really like you,” you confess, frustration melting away to reveal the uneasy upturn on your lips. You lied when Seungkwan asked if you would ever consider introducing Soonyoung to Nari. In a different world, you would’ve loved to take the time to take Nari to the museum and introduce Soonyoung there. They’d definitely bond over their love for tigers. “Seungkwan is my best friend, and helps me take care of Nari. I adopted her five years ago.” 

Something softens in Soonyoung’s eyes, and the air feels much more relaxed. But his dark brows remain knit together, and he looks at you with confused eyes. “Then if you like me so much, why didn’t you tell me you had a daughter?”

“Because kids can be deal breakers,” you admit, and the colorful classroom feels smaller as you hug yourself. “I just, wanted you to like me first.” 

It’s the primary reason why it’s taken you so long to date. Sure, there’d be a fling here and there, but nothing that feels as tangible as Soonyoung is. You’re not old enough to find a partner that wouldn’t blink at the sign of children, yet you’re still at that weird age threshold where a partner could immediately run for the hills at the mention of one. Nothing will top Nari, she’s number one in your heart, but the small selfish part wanted you to put the focus on yourself for just one night. 

“You don’t have to hide, I want every part of your life no matter how long we have,” he assures you gently, firmly without an ounce of regret. Soonyoung opens his arms, and you cry in relief when you get to collapse in the scent of his cologne. You tuck your head in the crook of his neck, slightly sweaty from whatever activities he needs to do with the kids, but you don’t mind. His voice is quiet, melting in your ears, “and I really like you too. I really like Nari as well, she’s a great kid.” 

“She is, isn’t she?” 

You two pull away, and he swipes a thumb under your eyes in case some tears manage to escape. “So, Friday? Movie?” 

“It’s a date.” 

“Where’s Nari?” the question is huffed against your breath as you’re pressed between your freshly washed bedspread and Soonyoung’s body. He takes care in making sure the zipper of your delicate dress doesn’t get caught in the rush, easily slipping your dress off and throwing it on your desk chair. 

“At Seungkwan’s, why?” 

His cheshire cat eyes glow under the moonlight, positively devious. “It’s date seven,” he announces sweetly. His gaze betrays his saccarine reply, a look that only tells you that Soonyoung plans to fuck you five ways to Sunday, and you’ll gladly let him. 

You sit up on your elbows, enjoying the show as Soonyoung quickly sheds his clothing. It’s ungraceful, exciting. Tonight was a simple carnival date, easily making you feel like a giddy college student all over again. Soonyoung won you five Pokemon keychains today, you could put a whole party on your hand. 

“It’s actually date six,” you tease, tilting your head as his pants finally come off, revealing black boxer briefs that snug deliciously around the waist. 

“Oh, okay,” he looks at you like you’ve spoken God’s word, reaching to pick up his shirt, “so you don’t want my dick fucking you raw tonight? Okay, I see how it is,” he pretends to put on his clothing, jabbing a thumb out the door. 

You have the audacity to giggle, pulling him over by the waistband, “Come here so I can make an exception.”

You don’t know what it is that makes you want you want to give everything to this man. Heck, five years ago you didn’t even want a man as an excuse to have kids. But as he nudges you in all the right places and places you on top of him, you know this man will treat you like an absolute treasure. Every kiss is laced with smiles and sweetness, filled with vigor and vivacity that fills you up and leaves you afloat. 

He takes care of you first, unwilling to let you budge as he places your core over his face. He makes quick, but effective use of his tongue and fingers, making sure you’re nice and sensitive for his future plans. You’re practically throbbing with pleasure, vibrating from every cell of your body. Within minutes he’s glistening in your arousal, and he pulls you down so you’re lined up with his crotch. It’s involuntary when you pulse against his member, your body shamefully alerting you that it’s desperate with need, and the remedy is right under you. 

Soonyoung looks more satisfied than you, eager to please you. Without warning, he stuffs two fingers in your mouth, “You pretty, pretty girl,” you are keen at the attention, your body is glowing a radiant rose. 

Your tongue rolls against his fingers, sticky and tasting of your arousal. Tilting your hips up you let Soonyoung pull his member out, lining it against your entrance. Feeling the soft tip brush against your delicate folds, you moan against his mouth. With a little ‘pop’ he releases you, lips shiny and parted. 

“I hope you don’t think I’m some kind of hit-it-n’quit-it kind of guy,” he noses the sensitive spot of your jawline, which distracts you momentarily when the plush tip nudges your folds, coaxing you to unite. “Because after tonight, I’m definitely keeping you. Forever.” 

The reply that dances on your tongue is overtaken by your whines when Soonyoung slips in fully, forcing your body to clench tightly against his. You take him, all of him. You feel wet and sticky and hot and swollen with affection as Soonyoung praises you for taking him so well. His pace is firm and passionate, short nails digging deliciously into your hips for leverage as he makes sure to fill you to the brim. 

He’s right, tonight is far from being a means to an end. You feel like you can have nights like this the rest of your life. And when the both of you finish and you’re pulling the covers over one another, you finally manage to grasp the reply that was nearly forgotten. 

Pressing a kiss to his jaw you whisper, “I’m keeping you, too.” 

“So, how long can we keep this a secret for?”

“Ideally? Ten months. Realistically, I’d say Christmas.” 

“Why Christmas?” 

“Because I know you’re going to be dying to get Nari a Christmas present.” 

Soonyoung props his elbow on the pillow, looking at you petulantly. “I could say it’s a good behavior reward. She’s been racking up those gold stars during morning meetings, babe. She’s not even trying.” 

“That’s my girl,” you coo, rolling over to lean your head on his chest. Light has long flooded into your apartment, seeping through your curtains and reflecting on your white duvet. Soonyoung looks absolutely fluffy and well rested, and you can’t help but reach to pat down the ebony bird’s nest atop his head. 

The two of you lay like that for a little bit, playing with each other’s cold feet under the covers and relishing under the touch of bare skin to bare skin. You remind yourself that you need to take Joshua out to dinner one of these days, as he managed the inevitable and set you up with  an amazing partner. 

“Breakfast?” Soonyoung pops the question easily, “let’s get steak.”

“Steak isn’t eaten for breakfast.” 

“Then can I eat you for breakfast?” 

You snort, hiding under the covers while Soonyoung attempts to tickle you. The whole act in itself feels wholly innocent despite the fact that you’re both naked and smell like sweat and sex. Just as you feel Soonyoung’s head dip under the covers to meet you at your chest, the door swings open. 

“Mama!” 

The previously warm room feels like wickedly sharp ice, freezing you to your spot as you clutch the covers closer to your chest. “Baby!” you cry exasperatedly, flinching when she throws all her weight on you. She’s still in her ladybug pajamas from last night, hair falling out of her braid. 

She lifts her head from your breast to give you an adorable one-toothed grin. You try your best to maintain eye-contact, but Nari has impeccable vision. Her grin evolves into a full-on beam when she finds your bed partner.

“Mr. Kwon!” she’s squealing, clamoring over your lap. You do a double-take when you see Soonyoung sitting next to you, wearing a t-shirt. Where on earth did he get that?

Soonyoung’s eyes reduce to crescents at his (secretly) favorite student. “Good morning, Nari-ah. Had a fun time at your Uncle’s house?” 

“Nari,” you force your daughter down to stand on the hardwood, giving her a stern look, “give Mr. Kwon some space, it’s really early and it’s the weekend.” 

Knitting her brows together, she looks between the two of you, “But you two don’t have any space.” 

You wince at her perception, and nudge yourself away so you’re pressed against your nightstand. The oakwood corner digs painfully into your back. 

“We were haviång a very special parent meeting,” you fight the urge to cry when Soonyoung turns on his teacher's voice, sending your daughter a very convincing smile. You watch as your daughter’s eyes go wide, probably feeling very special that her teacher came all the way to her house to have a meeting. “You’ve been doing so well during the read-alouds that I had to tell your mama in person!” 

“I told you mama!” Nari juts out her chest, and you lean over to kiss the crown of her head. “But Mr. Kwon, why are you having it in mama’s room?” 

“Her room is the warmest!” he says like it’s the most obvious thing, his and Nari’s eyes widening simultaneously as he gestures to the open window. “The sun travels directly into your bedroom in the morning, and those rays send heat—”

“Mr. Kwon,” your voice is as steady as it can be, and  you frown when Soonyoung wiggles his brows. You already know he’s thinking of three separate ways you can use the term Mr. Kwon in private, but you’re not having any of that, “shouldn’t we uh, wrap up this… meeting?” 

“I wanna stay,” Nari glowers, obviously nosy as to what you two are talking about.

“I know baby. We just gotta finish up the meeting, okay? Can you—” you cut  yourself off when Seungkwan finally decides to make his appearance, eyes wide at commotion he’s created. He’s in matching pajamas, ridiculously red as he bends down to scoop up Nari. Absolutely sweating and as red as his clothes, his eyes dart between the two of you. You could care less that Seungkwan’s eyes have bags under their bags, and was probably too tired to catch her when she ran inside the house. No, Seungkwan doesn’t deserve the title of godfather anymore. 

“Nari! You can’t interrupt teacher meetings,” Seungkwan pretends to scold, and Nari turns her head so she can hide in her Uncle’s shoulder. 

Knowing that Nari can’t see a thing, you mouth a very explicit I will kill you to your best friend, and he immediately mouths an apology to the both of you as he ushers himself out the door. You wait ten seconds for your daughter to be out of ear shot, before dropping the blanket from your neck and throwing yourself against the pillows. 

But Soonyoung’s chuckling, pressing a litany of kisses all over your bare body in an attempt to comfort you. Instead of reveling in his lazy morning touch, you want to disappear between the sheets, never to be seen. What will the PTO moms say when they find out? How will you stop Nari from telling Jeonghan, and therefore Jeonghan telling the entire kindergarten population? Why isn’t Soonyoung freaking out about this? Instead, he favors to taste your body, in between kisses muttering something about it being kismet that Nari so happened to see right as you were discussing the secrecy of your relationship. Ten years from now, your daughter will be horrified when she realizes that no, teachers don’t normally give housecalls in your mother’s bed.

Your boyfriend pinches your thigh, regarding you with mirth in his eyes. 

“So, that means I can buy her a Christmas present now, right?” 

[xshybutdeadlyx]

Let this be a mark of stupid/random things in your ask box-- an actual question to start though.Favorite House of Ashes AU concept AND/OR Favorite HOA headcanon?That is all (for now dun dun dun) 👁〰👁💛

Honestly my favorite AU for just about anything is ABO universe. I'm a slut for that shit especially for an Omega Jason that will still rip you're head off no matter what you present as and turns the stereotype of omega on his head and Alpha Salim being absolutely enamored by it lol

I also like a good medieval fantasy AU with knight Jason and Dragon Salim along with knight Nick and King Queen Eric and Rachel because DUH. I'm planning on writing this AU someday because why the fuck not right? Kinda got a basic idea for it and everything! XD I like Mermaid AU's as well either one human one mermaid or both mermaids I don't really have a preference. I just love me fantasy AU's

For headcanons

*As much as I like instant bond between Zain and Jason I think it would take awhile for Zain to be really comfortable and trusting but I like the thought of Jason busting his ass to try and get Zains approval and when he finally gets it that's when all hell breaks loose and the chaos father son duo is born!

*Eric is also so guilty of the events of HoA that he personally goes to the houses of the fallen to deliver the news and to take responsibility. One family member physically lashed out at him and he told the men who accompanied him to back off because he believes he deserves it.

*Also got a fic along with this headcanon that Jason and Eric have a terrible relationship even though Eric is dating Nick and Rachel, Nick tells it to not let it get to him but Eric confronts Jason about it and it turns into a screaming match of Jason blaming Eric for every death that happened as well as his anger towards Eric telling him to leave Salim behind until Eric literally breaks down about his deep guilt about surviving and tells Jason about apologizing to the family's and even his guilt about being happy and how much he could take back what he said about Salim because Salim is a good man and never made him feel unwanted even though he has the right to. And just Jason is so shocked and his anger in the moment slowly melts away. He's still angry it's hard for that to go away completely but he now understand Eric a lot more and they build a better friendship from that I just really love Eric and he deserved a redemption!!! *Body slams a table*

*Nick and Jason are gossip bitches. Anything that happens in their life along with anyone else's life they get on the phone or meet and person for a beer and gossip like a bunch teenagers.

*Rachel is always gonna be a boss ass bitch and she continues to show it in public but with Eric and Nick alone she's so fucking SOFT with them giving them sweet kisses asking how their day went cuddling up to them when they are having a bad day or just sitting next to Eric when he's having an episode and not wanting to be touched but just letting her presence be known. But if she don't know you it's resting bitch face, she's definitely a "he didn't ask for pickles on his hamburger" kinda lover lol

Sadly I don't really have anything for Clarice, Merwin, or Joey I didn't really get to attached to them when playing I did like the main cast :/

But yeah that's all I got for now lol

[ygo-is-gayer-than-i-remember]

Yugioctober Day 27: Burger

(Prompt list)  (Read it here on Ao3!)

Summary: The unexpected arrival of a long-lost friend makes Anzu's slow work day much more exciting.

It was a snowy Wednesday afternoon and, with nothing to do, Anzu was relaxing on her phone in the employees-only area.  There were a few patrons out on the floor already enjoying their meals, so Anzu wasn’t worried about wasting time until one of them asked for their check.  Despite having to cut down on her hours, she was grateful to the Burger World people for allowing her to transfer locations when she moved to New York.  The extra income was a huge help when covering the cost of tuition and everyday necessities.

The bell above the door chimed, and Anzu left a quick like on a photo of Yugi and Atem’s new cat before slipping her phone back into her pocket.  Snatching a menu from the top of the stack, she weaved through the tables like a practiced figure skater, her customer service smile already plastered on her face by the time she reached the new arrival.

“Hi there, welcome to Burger World!” she chirped as she set the menu down.  “My name is--”

“Anzu?!”

The haze of her routine lifted, allowing her to take in the details of the person she was serving.  Her eyes widened.

“Miho?”

Sure enough, Miho Nosaka was smiling up at her from the booth, but she certainly wasn’t the Miho who had moved away during their freshman year of high school.  Her swooping lavender hair was cut almost as short as Honda’s, the few rebellious strands falling across her forehead a stark contrast from the bangs that once covered it completely.  The bow in her hair was gone, replaced by a mint bowtie under the collar of a pale pink button-up with little white polka dots.  A red trench coat was neatly folded on the bench next to her, a knit beanie and a flannel scarf resting on top of it.

Anzu’s smile shifted to one of genuine happiness as Miho shot up and yanked her into a hug.  Both of them squeezed the life out of each other, their squeals and laughs muffled by the other’s clothes, and instinctually continued their conversation in Japanese.

“Miho, holy shit, how are you?!  It’s been so long!”

“I know!  I’m so sorry I didn’t keep in touch, my phone got stolen a couple years back and I couldn’t remember anyone’s numbers!”  She gave Anzu an apologetic smile and sat back down.

“Oh my god, don’t worry about it!  Trust me, there was a lot going on, you probably wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”  She pulled out her notepad and pen.  “You still get your usual?”

“Yep!  You still remember?”

“Duh, of course I remember!”  She read off the order as she scribbled it down.  “A double bacon cheeseburger, medium rare, no mustard, no pickles, a chocolate milkshake, and fries with extra extra extra ketchup on the side.”

Miho laughed.  Anzu had forgotten how beautiful her laugh was.  “You got it!  Except switch out the milkshake for a hot chocolate, it’s way too cold for a milkshake.  And you know I’m a ketchup hog, they always stiff you on ketchup.”

“No they don’t, you just eat more ketchup than a normal human being.”  She fixed the order and flipped her notepad closed so she could look back into Miho’s royal blue eyes.  “Since it’s so slow today, I could probably ask my manager if I can take my break early.  We can catch up!”

“I would love that!”

Anzu grinned and shot her a wink on her way back to the kitchen.  After getting the all-clear from her manager, she added her own order to Miho’s ticket, dropped it off with the cook, and waited until it was ready.  Since there was really nothing for her to do anyway, it didn’t cut into her break time.  She was grateful her manager was so flexible.

She returned to Miho’s table with two trays of food, one balanced in each hand, and set them down so she could sit across from her.  Miho popped the lid off her hot chocolate to blow off some of the steam.

“So how’s everyone back in Domino?” she asked.

Anzu smiled around the fry in her mouth.  “They’re doing great!  Everyone graduated last year, Yugi, Honda, and Ryou are at DCU, and Jou’s working on becoming a top duelist.  And you remember Shizuka, Jou’s little sister?  She’s been getting into fashion designing!  She’s already halfway through high school, can you believe that?”

“No way!”  Miho gawked at her, her cheeks puffed out from the huge bite she took out of her burger.  She held up a finger while she finished chewing.  “She just started junior high when I left!”

“I know!  She’s even taller than me now!”

“Stop it, you’re lying!”

“I swear I’m not, see for yourself!”  Whipping her phone out of her pocket, she pulled up a picture she took of her and all of their friends outside the airport before she flew to New York for the first time.

“Wow, look at how tall Yugi is too!”  Miho leaned over the table to get a better look at everyone.  “Who’s that?”

Anzu followed where she was pointing.  “Oh, that’s Yugi’s boyfriend, Atem!  He uh...moved to Domino from Egypt a few years ago.”

“And they just happen to have the same hair?”

“It’s a long story, trust me.  Come on, tell me about you!  How’ve you been?  What’ve you been doing?  When did you cut your hair?”

“I knew you were going to ask eventually!”  Miho giggled into her hot chocolate.  “I cut it last year, but I traded my ribbons for bowties a year before that.”

“Leave it to Miho to always work a bow into her outfit.”

She shrugged.  “What can I say?  Old habits die hard.”

They spent the rest of Anzu’s break catching up, chatting about fond memories and new friends they made while they were separated.  Anzu had to do a bit of clever maneuvering to explain some of it without giving away the whole “Yugi was possessed by the spirit of an ancient Pharaoh” thing, but it didn’t take away from the joy she felt at finally reuniting with one of her best friends.  After what was definitely not long enough, the timer on her phone went off to signal the end of her break.

Miho hastily wiped the grease off her fingers and put her palm face-up on the table.  “Phone, give.”

Anzu handed her phone over, and Miho opened a new contact for her to punch in her information.  Anzu waited for her to finish before swapping her phone for the check.  Once everything was paid for and Miho was bundled up again, they exchanged another tight hug, and Anzu walked Miho to the door.

“You better not forget my number this time,” Anzu teased and was rewarded with another round of Miho’s musical laughter.

“Trust me, I won’t!  But just in case I do…”  In the blink of an eye, Miho leaned in, pecked Anzu on the cheek, and threw open the door with a blast of cold air.  “I missed my chance years ago, I’m not about to miss it now!  Call me!”

Then she was gone, leaving a flustered, giddy Anzu staring out at the snowy street through the glass.  Her phone was still open to Miho’s contact.  She smiled down at the little note below her name.

“Your all-time favorite gal pal!! <3 ;)”

[buggerthis]

okay okay ats for the fandom ask game

will understands me thank you

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

oh you know…………..

My Boy . mr wyndam pryce . i think about a lot of people in ats but wesley………he is buffy voice in my Heart . other contestants include ummm the entire cast . but i have so many Thoughts about wesley and his character arc is just…..

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

lilah……!!!!!!! she. she

not in the beginning . but i think about her being sad and i’m like holy Shit…… runners up include dru and darla . maybe angel . AND CORDELIA!!

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

UM HELLO!!!!!!! LORNE!!!!!!!! most underrated character in Media ever . he is literally so perfect . he is full of tragedy…. he drinks a silly little drink any chance he gets . he’s queer . he’s green . he was famous and then nobody mentioned it . his family sucks. he calls everyone lovely honey pickle and it’s okay . he kills a man . WHAT

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

does she count………………….. illyria . my love . little alien thing . i needed 5 seasons of just her

ALSO

I KNOW EVERYONE LOVES HIM BUT. perfect man . stupid bisexual irish stoner demon. gone too soon……… <3

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

technically this is angelus . but i mean. OHHH ALSO

KNOX BELOVED.. he’s so. fucking insane. ALSO THIS GUY PLAYED HOLDEN WEBSTER WHICH IS ALSO ONE OF MY FAV BG CHARACTERS EVER

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

oh spike……….. he is so tired . and a ghost . i would kill him (for his own benefit) . second is angel because duh

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

evil laughs.

i Hate You Bitches . worst characters ever . goodbye

[sunaswife]

Summary: It’s been five years since you’ve seen your ex, Rin. He’s still not over you and you’re not over him. When he finds out you have children he thought he didn’t have a chance. Then he finds out they’re his? All of a sudden you’re teaching Suna how to be a single dad.

🔪: wow it’s been awhile how is everyone?! I apologize for being a shitty writer but sometimes you just don’t have motivation

Warnings: Fluff, angst I guess, drama, and cuteness twin overload

Previously Up Next Masterlist

Chapter 11

“You’re up early.” You heard and you looked up from your laptop. “I could say the same for you. You always needed your beauty rest.” You joked and Rin laughed. “You do know work can wait. You shouldn’t overwork yourself.” Rin pointed out. “I know, this isn’t really work. I was so distracted yesterday with our talk that I didn’t get a lesson plan ready for the kids so I have to rush and do it right now because I have the kids on a schedule and—“

“Relax.” You felt his rough hands on your shoulders. You completely froze, your heart started racing. “Like I said you overwork yourself. When I finish packing up all my crap you can teach me and we can do it together, okay?” Rin leaned forward to see your face. “Um..yeah sure.” You gulped and looked back at the screen. “Oi, your face is red. You have a fever or something?” Rin asked and tried touching your forehead but you smacked his hand away. “No I’m fine. No fever.” You assured and took a sip of your tea. “Oh so you’re falling for me is that it? Did I make you blush?” He teased and you elbowed his stomach. He winced and hunched forward. “Go pack or stay with Osamu.” You muttered and began to furiously type on your laptop.

“Alright Alright geez. Don’t miss me too much.” He said sarcastically and you rolled your eyes. “Wait before I go.” He said and you looked up with raised brows. “You’re allowed to have pets here right?” He said. “Yeah why?” You asked. “I have my dog...remember..?” He bit his lip. “Oh geez.” You groaned and rubbed your temples. “Don’t worry, he has his shots and everything. He’s trained too. Like he plays dead and stuff.” He said. “Plays dead? A more convincing argument would be like sitting or opening the fridge and getting a can of beer.” “He’s a dog not a servant.” He argued, “How big is your dog?” You asked. “Mmm medium sized, smaller than a German Shepard but bigger than a Jack Russel Terrier.” He said and you raised another brow.

“You act like I know dog breeds. Hell I didn’t even know you knew dog breeds.” You said. “I got chewy’s mom after the whole incident and she really distracted me when I had episodes, she had pups and died since she was sick so I kept one of her pups. I kind of became obsessed with dogs I guess you could say.” He replied. “Fine, is he an inside or outside dog?” You asked, “Both but he sleeps inside.” Rin said. “Okay, I’ll get the back ready for him so he can get cozy and mark his territory or whatever dogs do.” You said. “He’s actually at my parents house, Osamu’s apartment doesn’t have a backyard for pets of his size.” He said.

“Well then that means we take a car instead of a train to Hyogo, right?” You asked and he nodded. “Okay cool. Now hurry and you’ll make it back in time for lunch or snack time.” You waved him off. He chuckled and gave a mock salute and he was gone. You took a deep breath and leaned back in the dining chair.

“What have I done?” You asked yourself. You avoided Rin’s emotional confession yesterday, but now you can’t stop thinking and getting confused with your own emotions. You chugged down your tea and finished making the lesson plan for today. Today is focusing on math and science. Tomorrow is language arts and history.

You got this.

You’re an independent woman.

Relax

“Damn you, Rintaro.” You huffed.

“Remember-“ you started off pointing a finger at Rin. “Do not give in to their puppy faces when they want candy, we already have some at home. We don’t need more.” You started and he nodded. “I’ll remember to get your almond milk, you still drink it right?” You asked and he nodded. “Why doesn’t daddy drink regular milk?” Rini asked, “He’s lactose intolerant.” You replied, “What’s lack toes interant..?” Akira asked, “My body can’t handle the sugar that’s in milk.” He said as you you began looking through the grocery list while he pushed the cart.

“What happens if you drink milk?” Rini asked, “His stomach will hurt and he’ll make the bathroom all smelly.” You teased and the kids said a synchronized ewww, Suna suddenly flicked your forehead and you lightly smacked his hand away. “Stop embarrassing me in front of my kids.” He huffed. “Stop embarrassing me in front of my kids.” You mocked under your breath and the kids giggled.

“Alright fruit. What kinds of fruit do you want this week?” You asked, “Strawberries!” Rini said, “watermelon.” Akira chimed in. “Rin?” You asked, “O-oh I can pick?” He asked completely confused, “Obviously, you live with us now. It’s your house too.” Akira said in a duh tone.

For a second it felt like time stopped when he saw you laughing with the kids, you all live together now. Like a family...an odd family but a family nonetheless. He’s already told you that he still loves you, and he respects your decision whether you don’t want him back or you need time. But at least you’re in his life and that’s all he wanted—no, all he needed.

“Green grapes..?” He asked, “Hey I was thinking grapes too!” You chuckled and the kids saw how their two parents divided and concurred the produce section, throwing in fruits and veggies into the cart.

“Y/N..” Rin called and you turned to see him and the kids making puppy dog eyes. He was holding a packet of chuupets, the ones where you freeze them and you can break them in half to share. You already had a half pack at home, “Seriously? I thought I had two kids not three.” You crossed your arms over your chest. “But chuupet is life.” Rin replied

“Chuupet is life.” You kids nodded, “You guys don’t even finish the ones we have at home.” You told your kids, “Because they have sugar and you won’t let us eat a whole bunch.” Akira defended, she was right. “Fine, one packet. We’ll buy one packet every two weeks.” You said and Suna fist bumped the kids and tossed the chuupets in the cart.

These past two weeks with Rin and the kids have been eventful. Rin has begun helping you with lesson plans, he likes the idea of homeschool because you both have hectic schedules and you’d rather watch the kids then hire a babysitter or nanny. The awkwardness between you both has died down and you’re comfortable in this new environment. You and Rin made a contract to split everything 50/50 and hung it on the wall of your living room as a joke.

Life was very much easier with Rin around and you began teaching him how to use a planner, he wasn’t keen on taking one with him everywhere but he found an app that works just as good. Everything was new to him as well, it was a bit hard to keep up and even though he doesn’t really like change he was comfortable as well. He just needs to stop staring too much when you’re cooking or helping the kids with school work. But it’s so hard for him to look away, you’re just so beautiful.

In his memo app he even has a list of Rini’s allergies and phone numbers for the kids doctor, dentist, and school. He was grateful you didn’t just toss all of this responsibility, when you called the doctor to schedule a six month check up, he was listening intently and took mental notes on what to ask.

He was also glad he got to know a little bit more about you as well, he didn’t know you had cooking karaoke time for the kids. The kids would sit on the counter laughing at your performance of ‘Let It Go’.

Also your favorite flower changed it’s no longer daises, you also can’t stand the taste of pickles anymore because when you were pregnant you craved them and now the smell makes you wanna vomit.

There was so many new things to discover in your little family and he was grateful that you allowed someone like him to waltz right in as if he didn’t break your heart. You were too kind for your own good.

He felt more confident now as he drove to his parents house with your head against the window, asleep. He looked at the rear view mirror and saw the kids sleeping as well with their mouths open and their snores filled the car. He smiled softly and looked back at the road, he passed the arcade he used to take you, as well as the old drive thru movie theater, and the road that led up to the hills where he took you on your guy’s first date. Before he knew it he saw his childhood home and he carefully parked the car to not startle the kids.

“Y/N..wake up.” He shook your shoulder lightly, your eyes slowly widened and you turned to him with tired eyes. “We’re here. I’ll help you take down the kids and you can go inside, I’ll have my dad help me bring in our bags.” He said softly. “Okay..thanks Rin.” You yawned and opened the door to go get the kids.

“Wake up princess.” You said as you unbuckled Akira’s car seat. She yawned and rubbed her eyes, she opened her arms for you to carry her and you rolled your eyes playfully. You held her in your arms and she wrapped her arms around your neck and rested her head on your shoulder. You grabbed her fox plush with your free hand and closed the car door. Rini was already running around and stretching with Rin.

“Akira you don’t wanna stretch?” You asked and she shook her head. “Are you really that tired..? You teased and she nodded. Rin grabbed some bags with Rini helping as well, he could only carry a backpack that barley had anything inside. You followed Rin up the familiar steps and he rang the door bell.

Soon enough the door opened and it was Rin’s dad, “Oh it’s been so long.” He sighed as he held his son in his arms. “It has.” Rin replied and slowly pulled away. He put the bag down to carry Rini and brought him eye level with his dad. “This is my son, Rini.” He spoke up and his dad gasps.

“He looks just like you.” He said and Rin nodded. “Yeah I get that a lot.” He chuckled. “Hi Rini, I’m grandpa but you can call me pops or gramps.” He said and Rini’s eyes widened. “Grandpa?” He asked and he nodded. “I always wanted a grandpa!” He yelled and tackled him in a hug. Rin’s dad took a few steps back with Rini in his arms and he chuckled. You gave a soft smile. “This is also my daughter Akira, they’re twins.” Rin spoke up and his dad look as you turned to show him your sleeping daughter.

“There’s two?!” He asked. You gave a small nod, “You must be Y/N, it’s nice to finally meet you.” He said. “It’s nice to meet you too Mr. Suna.” You said. “No need for that just call me Kauru.” He smiled softly and you nodded. “Alright, Kauru. Thank you for allowing us into your home.” You said and he waved off. “Your mom should be here in a few she just went to buy some groceries.” He told Rin and he nodded.

You were shown to Rin’s old room which is where the kids will be sleeping, you and Rin will be sleeping on futons in the living room. Akira had finally woken up and her and Rini were outside playing with Rin’s dog. A car horn honked outside and Rin and Kauru went outside to help with the groceries. You followed them as well to help and that’s when you finally met Rin’s mother.

She gave a small glare and scoffed, she walked past you, purposely bumping her shoulder with yours. She clearly stated you weren’t welcomed and you had no idea of the shit storm coming your way.

🏷: @therealwalmartjesus @differentballooncollection @aaesuki @atsunflower @dope-squish @prettysetterboiss @june-phantom @tomo-uwu @austriasmariazelle @xrnia @katsulia @aprettyfruit @shut-your-eyes-kiss-me-goodbye @tvbiio @sun-daddy-yoriichi @kamenoyaki @ppangiiroo @loeyprivvv @kmskj92 @lovinnoya @sarahvvictoria @tris-does-stuff @mokkeguts @sunaluvr6969@bara-rose-would @sempiternal-amour @volleybloop @leykyuu @bokutoichigo @stfucanunot @iloveanime691 @atsumusdomain @ohrintarou @shoutosimp @rintasuna @bokutosdivineass @anngelllla @toworuu @hidden-otaku-stuff @seijohiselite @caxsthetic @aquariarose @hhwanggu @bakuhoetoedoroki @yoozuku @osamus-onigiri @akaashi-todorki i @donica95 @kakaokenma @airheadpillar

Thank you for being patient and understanding!

More tags in comments!

[dreaminae]

We All Need The One Friend

Chapter 8

Hours rolled by as sunlight shifted to moonlight. Friendly competition soon became dangerous as personal tensions rose within the group.

"Rise of Batman!" One person guessed of Jordan's pose.

"Transformers!" A friend playfully argued.

Jordan changes poses in hopes that it might be easier to guess.

With time up, Jordan cracked up as everyone failed to guess his term.

"Okay, what even was that?" Simone giggled.

"Back to the future." Jordan responded in a 'duh' tone as if everyone should've known. "Greatest movie of all time!"

"I've never watched that movie in my life." Simone chuckled, "Plus, the greatest movie of all time is Parasite. Hello!"

"Jordan doesn't do subtitles." J.J laughed. "Like have you met my man?"

Everyone joined in the laughter, but Simone couldn't help but feel like it was strange that she hasn't known a small detail like that.

The game went on as Vanessa took the reigns.

"One word." One person shouted.

"A place. No no, a person." Another one added to list of clues.

"Uh, a painting.... a movie." Layla interjected.

"No, a plane. Wait, what?" One of them fumbled over when Vanessa switched stances.

"You're on a plane."

Giggling, Vanessa changed gestures again.

"Bald. You're bald. A bald eagle." J.J guessed.

"No, not an animal." Vanessa choked up.

"Aye, no cheating." Jordan chuckled as Vanessa spoke.

"C'mon guys." Vanessa encouraged, ignoring Jordan's rules. "You had a poster of him in your room when your ten." She spat out in Asher's direction.

"Samuel L. Jackson!" Asher shouted, jumping up as if he won the lottery.

Liv glanced between the two of them as if they grew two heads. It was stupid how one small detail held a bigger picture.

"Well, you don't get a point for that one." Simone scrutinized, gaining a careless shrug from Vanessa.

The game rolled on, leading to Spencer's turn.

Galloping his feet and twirling his arm, Spencer caused everyone to gather into fits of laughter.

"A cowboy," Jordan shouted first.

"The rodeo." Asher chuckled.

"Wild, wild west." Layla joined in, holding back her laughs.

Adding to his performance, Spencer shook his foot hysterically, while twirling his arm like a madman.

Finally catching on to his charade, Olivia thought back to the night she made Spencer rewatch all her favorite childhood movies. Quoting one of her favorite lines, Spencer had her in hysterics for half an hour. She could still remember him using her belt as a rope, shouting 'There's a snake in my boot'.

"Woody," Olivia muttered with a small smile.

"What?" Her brother asked curiously, not completely hearing her response.

"It's woody!" Olivia laughed, which Spencer replied to with a smirk.

They met each other eyes, before bursting out, "There's a snake in my boot!"

The entire group fell out laughing, excluding Layla.

Spencer returned to his seat grinning like an idiot, but couldn't help but to notice his girlfriend's harsh mood.

"Hey, are you alright?"

Layla nodded lightly. "Guess I am just tired." She muttered, not bothering to look in his direction.

Sensing there was more to it, Spencer left it alone, not wanting to cause a scene in front of his friends.

"Alright, I have the perfect game to play next," Vanessa announced, as she returned from the house with her bottle of booze. "Anyone up for a game of Never Have I Ever. The more you've done the more you drink."

Her announcement soured the mood as Spencer immediately shut down her idea. "Sorry, Ma." Spencer asserted firmly. "Ain't bo drinking happening this weekend."

His eyes flew to Olivia, followed by everyone else's. She rolled her eyes at their dramatics.

"Oh, please. Don't stay sober on my account." Olivia dryly encouraged. After all, this was the first time in weeks she'd been completely sober. With all of her friends within proximity this weekend, drinking wasn't an option for her.

Noting Liv's bitter tone towards her, Vanessa tried to ease the tension. "Sorry, Liv. I forget that you don't drink. That was so insensitive of me." She apologized, placing the booze on the ground.

"It's okay. It's not something I'd expected you to know, so.." Liv shrugged it off, dismissing the subject all together.

"No, liquor. Got it." Vanessa summed up, ignoring Liv's clear implied diss of Vanessa's newness to their group.

Asher rubbed Olivia's thigh, silently asking her to lighten up. Cocking up a brow, she gave him her iconic 'I could careless' glare.

"No drinks doesn't mean no turn-up." J.J cheered. "Introducing the burns of all burns -- jalapeno-infused pickle juice."

"What don't you have in that box man?" Spencer questioned, seriously wondering where J.J randoms items came from.

"Let the burns begin."

---------------------------

"Alright, never have I ever walked in on my parents doing it." Simone started the game off.

First victim up, Asher gulped down his first dose of the throat burning juice.

"Oh, God. Asher. No!" Olivia cringed.

"I don't wanna talk it." Asher chuckled at the memory. "RV trip...'08....super weird."

"Oh, you're gonna talk about it." Spencer and Jordan laughed together.

"Not the one to up to Sanoma. How could you not to me?" Vanessa asked playfully, catching Olivia's attention yet again.

Liv couldn't help but wonder just how much did Vanessa know about Asher, that she didn't.

"Cause I was scarred for life," Asher replied, oblivious to the questionable expression of Liv's face.

"Alright, my turn. Never have I ever bought 300 dollars shoes for my one night in Vegas." Simone teased Olivia's bad spending habits.

Tensing up, Liv looked everywhere besides at Layla.

"No cheating. Drink up, Liv." Simone laugh, unaware of the big secret she just revealed.

Layla's eyes narrowed in Liv's direction, fed up with the secrets.

Spencer gawked at his girlffriend, realizing that he and Liv might have to come clean sooner than expected.

"Alright, never have I ever said I love you just to get someone to hook up with me." Vanessa added to game.

All the boys drank besides Spencer.

"Yikes, that was a test that you all failed." Vanessa taunted, "Besides Spencer."

"My bro is a real one. When he says it, he means it." J.J admired, increasing the growing tension between Spencer and his love interest.

In Liv's case, her heart clenched at the mentally, replayed memory of Spencer professing his love for her. She yearned to have a chance just to tell him how she felt, despite the chance he no longer felt the same.

However, in Layla's case, all the times that Spencer claimed to love her we're burning in a flame of betrayal. Because despite that fact she had no solid evidence, that conveyed her worse thought she knew Spencer wasn't being truthful with her.

"You're a lucky one, Layla."

Layla's sneer went unheard by the majority of the group besides the two people who knew the jig was up.

Unaware of the conflicts brewing, J.J continued the game. His hand already pointing at his aimed victim.

"Never have I ever ran naked through a football field."

Admitting the embarrassing memory, Jordan gulped back his shot of pickle juice.

"Jordan! Tell me you didn't!" Simone teased.

"Okay. Okay. I did it. I run through the field, butt naked." Jordan chuckled. "What was it? Freshmen year?"

He and J.J chuckled laughed over the recollection.

"Varsity team stole all of our clothes, thanks to Ash -- over here --- acting like he owned the place during tryouts" Jordan recalled funnily.

"Cause I did." Asher cockily popped his collar. "It's called confidence."

"Confidence. Okay." Jordan playfully mocked. "Whatever you want to call it. Your dumbass stays getting us in trouble."

Asher nodded with a knowing smile. But Vanessa saw nothing funny about it.

"Wow." She gasped seriously. "Okay. Never have I ever crapped all over folks that we're supposed to be my friends."

The laughter stopped, and the smiles dropped in reaction to Vanessa switch up.

"Uh, Vanessa it's alright." Asher tried to jump in before she took things too far.

"It's just jokes." Jordan defended himself, not seeing the harm in messing around.

Vanessa's scornful expression was enough for Jordan to see that she couldn't disagree more.

Maybe it was her role as a protective sister that came into play. Perhaps, it was the jealously towards Vanessa knowing things about Asher that Liv didn't. Or maybe it was simply that Liv didn't feel Vanessa had any right to make presumed assumptions on any of the dynamics within their group when Vanessa barely knew any of them beyond a first-name basis.

Whatever it was, Vanessa's attempt to trash talk her twin was Olivia's last straw. And with that, she felt it was only right to return the favor.

"Hmm, well, Never have I ever spent the summer getting to somebody else's boyfriend a little too much." Liv snapped at Vanessa.

"Liv! What the hell!" Asher choked up, unable to believe that she publically humiliated Vanessa in that manner.

"Yo, Ash. Relax. Let's just play the game." Jordan instructed, trying to ease the tension he caused.

"You wanna play? Fine." Asher groaned. "Never have I ever cheated a concussion protocol to play in a game." He added spitefully.

"What is he talking about?" Simone inquired seriously, over the entire game. "You cheated your concussion protocol? How could you not tell me something like that?"

"You mean like you told me about Princeton?" Jordan asked, trying to guilt trip her right back.

"Wow!" Simone gasped in awe, tossing her blanket aside before storming off.

"Ah, babe, wait! I didn't mean it like that!" Jordan quibbled, following behind Simone. "Baby, wait. Sweetie!"

With the fun atmosphere ruined, the remainder of the group broke off to deal with their own problems.

-----------------------------

"Can you believe Liv?" Asher groaned, as he and Layla entered the kitchen.

"Not really. Find it hard to believe anyone with all the secrets that's been hidden." Layla replied harshly.

"What do you mean?" Asher asked, clueless.

"Simone's Never Have I Ever!" Layla responded in a duh tone. "When has Olivia ever gone to Vegas."

"Olivia wouldn't lie about going to Vegas. She has no reason to." Asher scoffed.

"You mean like she had no reason to lie about being in Mexico." Layla revealed.

"Liv came to Mexico? When?" Asher asked desperately. "She never told me."

"She went to Mexico to surprise her boyfriend." Layla groaned, annoyed that she had to be the one to tell him. "Only when she got there she saw you and random girl boo'd up." She gestured towards Vanessa as the brunette and J.J entered the room.

"Wait, you and Asher?" J.J asked heartbroken, catching the last part of Layla's statement. "Since when?"

"Where's Olivia now?" Asher requested to know, needing to hear all of this from her.

"I don't think that" Spencer began to suggest against going after Liv, but was interrupted by his girlfriend.

"She's down by bonfire," Layla interjected before her boyfriend could continue to shield his side piece from the mess they made.

Bypassing the other three teens, Asher went to find his girlfriend and demand some answers. Meanwhile, Vanessa and J.J left Spencer and Layla to handle their business in private.

------------------------------

[breaniebree]

A Second Chance

For those who have been asking... this is my master list once more:

ASC Chapter Titles as If They Were Friends Episodes

Part One: Harry’s First Year With His Dads (Chapters 1-49)

1. The One Where They Were Dead 2. The One Where the Rat Is Out of the Bag  3. The One Where James and Lily Die  4. The One Where Moony and Padfoot Make Up  5. The One Where Harry Meets Padfoot  6. The One Where Sirius Kidnaps Harry  7. The One Where Sirius Punches Vernon Dursley  8. The One Where Harry Meets Remus  9. The One Where Sirius and Harry Make Grilled Cheese  10. The One With Thea  11. The One Where Harry Asks What a Kiss Is  12. The One With the Library Card  13. The One Where They Remember the Past  14. The One With the Tonkses’  15. The One With Harry’s First Nightmare  16. The One With Professor Moony  17. The One With The Puppy  18. The One With the Second Best Day Ever  19. The One Where Harry Meets An Excellent Secret Keeper and Her Brother  20. The One Where Sirius Learns What He Missed in Azkaban  21. The One With the Brownies 22. The One With the Date  23. The One With the Weasleys  24. The One With the Bad Dreams  25. The One Where Sirius Learns the Key to Moony's Secret Pranking Success  26. The One With Operation Prank the Piss Out of Harry Potter  27. The One With the Wolfsbane Fight  28. The One Where the Marauders Discover A Wolf  29. The One With the Spanking  30. The One With the House Rules and Where Sirius and Ted Build a Treehouse 31. The One With the Wolf  32. The One Where Remus Tells Sirius To Deal with the Blacks  33. The One Where Harry Asks About Boobies  34. The One With the Locket  35. The One With Blackbird  36. The One With the Birthday Orgasms  37. The One With the Three Brothers  38. The One With Godric’s Hollow  39. The One Where Sirius Speaks French 40. The One With the First Christmas  41. The One With the Pensieve  42. The One With the Memories Part I  43. The One With the Memories Part II  44. The One When Padfoot and Prongs Become Blood Brothers  45. The One Where Harry Has A Sleepover  46. The One With the Tickle War  47. The One With the Viscount of Falmouth  48. The One With Roni  49. The One With the Birthday Planning 

Part Two: Harry Growing Up With A Family, Ages 7-11 (Chapters 50-61)

50. The One With the Best Birthday Ever  51. The One Where Padfoot and Moony Know Nothing About Sick Kids  52. The One Where Remus Slaps Sirius  53. The One With the Giant Cheese Fort 54. The One With Operation Get Lily Evans to Fall in Love With Prongs  55. The One Where Remus Thinks He’s a Very Bad Man  56. The One Where Harry Asks About Sex  57. The One Where Tonks Turns 17  58. The One Where Remus Feels Like He’s Robbing the Cradle  59. The One Where Remus Learns He Has A Mate  60. The One Where Sirius Shags the Realtor 61. The One With the Letter 

Part Three: First Year (Chapters 62-73)

62. The One Where Harry Gets Hedwig  63. The One Where Harry Understands the Fear of Voldemort  64. The One With The Sorting  65. The One Where Sirius Was Almost Bitten By a Panther… And Totally Didn’t Pee His Pants  66. The One With the Youngest Seeker In Over a Century 67. The One With the Three-Headed Dog  68. The One With Zee  69. The One With Sheer Dumb Luck  70. The One Where Sirius Lets Zee Drive His Bike  71. The One Where the Weasley Boys Come Over for Christmas  72. The One Where Minnie Tells Sirius To Get A Job  73. The One Where No One Listens So Harry Has to Do Everything and His Friends Follow Him So He Doesn't Die 

Part Four: Second Year (Chapters 74-105)

74. The One Where the Whole School Knows  75. The One Where Harry is Jealous  76. The One Where Sirius Eats Crow  77. The One Where Zee Meets Minnie  78. The One With the Proud Enough to Cry Letter 79. The One Where They Realize Their New Professor is a Moron  80. The One Where Remus Gets His Shit Together  81. The One Where Harry Meets His Fanboy  82. The One Where Binns Doesn’t Put His Class to Sleep For Almost Ten Whole Minutes 83. The One Where Sirius Finds Out  84. The One When Remus Punches Lockhart  85. The One With the Mad House Elf  86. The One With the Great Shoebox Capture  87. The One Where Sirius Tells Zee About the Marauders  88. The One Where Harry is Homesick  89. The One Where Sirius Says I Love You  90. The One With the Sex Talk 91. The One With Ted Walking in on Remus Fingering Tonks… And Remus Adds Another Finger  92. The One Where Draco Comes to Christmas  93. The One Where Sirius Actually Gets a Job  94. The One Where Sirius Asks About Cursed Scars  95. The One Where Remus Tells Tonks and She says ‘Duh!’  96. The One Where Fred Hears the Name Padfoot  97. The One With Peter’s Trial Part I  98. The One With Peter’s Trial Part II  99. The One Where Ginny Tells Harry She Has A Pen-Pal  100. The One With the Eyes As Green As a Fresh Pickled Toad  101. The One Where Tonks Is Under the Desk  102. The One Where Harry Writes in the Diary  103. The One Where It’s Not Follow the Butterflies  104. The One Where Sirius Is Sent Home Without An Explanation 105. The One Where Ginny is Scared Harry Will Never Speak To Her Again 

Part Five: Third Year (Chapters 106-143)

106. The One Where Sirius and Remus Demand Answers  107. The One With Prophecies and Horcruxes  108. The One Where Harry Learns to Drive  109. The One Where Bill and Charlie Talk About the Importance of Being A Good Big Brother 110. The One Where Sirius Realizes He Wants Zee Forever But Is Too Chicken To Say It 111. The One With Operation Fuck Up Voldemort’s Plans  112. The One Where Cissy Tattles on Abraxas  113. The One Where Harry Sees More Than He Should Between His Roommates  114. The One Where Colin Tells Ginny To Get Over It  115. The One Where Theo Comes Out  116. The One Where Sirius Tells Lucius If He Fucks Up He Will Kill Him  117. The One With the FUVP Pow-Wow  118. The One Where They Return to the Chamber of Secrets  119. The One Where Harry Finds Out  120. The One Where the Marauders Prank Snape 121. The One Where Draco and Theo Make Bad Detectives  122. The One With Nyx  123. The One Where Harry Throws a Tantrum  124. The One Where They Skive Off Class Because Harry Talks 125. The One Where Harry Asks Out Cho  126. The One With Harry’s First Date  127. The One Where Sirius, Remus, and Dumbledore Fuck Up  128. The One With Moody  129. The One Where Harry Gets Slapped  130. The One Where Sirius and Tonks Decide To Fuck With Snape  131. The One With Lily’s Ghost  132. The One With the Gaunt Property  133. The One With the Defence Club  134. The One With the Wizengamot  135. The One Where Harry Meets the Americans  136. The One Where They Forget to Tell Sirius  137. The One With the Insomniacs Club  138. The One Where Bellatrix Shows Up  139. The One With the Time Turner  140. The One With Umbitch's Creepy Song  141. The One With the Wolf in the Cage  142. The One Where Harry Shouts at Sirius and He Just Shouts Right Back  143. The One Where Both of Them Feel Like Shit 

Part Six: Fourth Year (Chapters 144-179)

144. The One With the Elder Wand  145. The One Where Sirius Tells Harry Not to Drink  146. The One Where Sirius Acts the Adult and Tells the Grangers  147. The One Where They Drink the Potion  148. The One Where Harry Can’t Change His Arm Back  149. The One Where Ginny Sees Harry Naked  150. The One When Harry Calls Remus a Bad Dog 151. The One Where Theo Goes to the Burrow  152. The One Where Harry Has a Fling  153. The One Where Sirius Panics Over Commitment  154. The One Where Zee Takes Harry Shopping  155. The One With the Quidditch World Cup  156. The One With Winky  157. The One With Babymort 158. The One Where Sirius Asks Zee to Move In  159. The One Where Snape Apologizes and Harry Thinks The World Ended  160. The One With the Pretty Boy, the Biggest Flirt, and the Flying House 161. The One Where Tonks Wants A Boob Job 162. The One Where Drama Queen Sirius Learns About Pens  163. The One Where Zee Just Wants A Damn Telephone But Sirius Can’t Stop Bitching 164. The One Where Girls Giggle and Ginny Looks Different 165. The One Where Harry Outflies a Dragon… Almost  166. The One Where Zee Tells The Paper to Back the Fuck Away from Her Son  167. The One Where Harry Thinks It’s the Formal Wear  168. The One Where Mr Weasley Thinks ‘Oh, Bloody Hell!' 169. The One Where Sirius Takes A Bath  170. The One Where Harry’s in Denial  171. The One Where Harry Thinks He Has Two Hostages  172. The One With the Love Potion  173. The One Where Zee Seduces Sirius in the Work Shed  174. The One With the Secret Swimming Pool  175. The One With the Bats From the Crotch 176. The One That Ends With ‘Oh Shit!’  177. The One Where Everyone Dies  178. The One With the Lullabye  179. The One Where Tonks Marks Remus 

Part Seven: Fifth Year (Chapters 180-222)

180. The One Where Remus Proposes  181. The One Where Lucius Gets Arrested  182. The One Where Remus Proposes Again and Harry Dies  183. The One With the Coconut Smell 184. The One Where Tonks Isn’t Pregnant 185. The One Where Dean Realizes He Fancies Seamus  186. The One With Baby, I Love You  187. The One Where Theo Meets Voldemort  188. The One Where Harry Calls Ginny His and Then Denies It  189. The One Where Everyone Breaks Out of Azkaban  190. The One With the War Council 191. The One Where Harry is Dumped  192. The One Where They Discuss The Size of Remus’ Package  193. The One Where Harry Learns About the Potters  194. The One Where Harry Finds the Tower Room  195. The One Where Zee’s in France  196. The One Where Harry Gets Constantly Interrupted  197. The One Where the Glacier Finally Melts  198. The One Where Harry Finally Asks  199. The One Where Sirius Cuddles and Zee Buys A Motorbike  200. The One Where Everyone Is Worried About Theo  201. The One With the Frying Pan  202. The One With the Fluke  203. The One Where Minnie Walks In  204. The One Where Remus Finds A Present Under the Tree  205. The One With Bellarosa and the Snake  206. The One Where Everyone Gets Motorbikes  207. The One Where Padfoot Suggests Pranking Umbitch to Fred and George  208. The One With the Great Escape from Umbitch  209. The One With Prince Finley and the Switching of Teacups  210. The One Where Theo is Courted and Dean Admits He's in Love  211. The One Where Hinny Says I Love You and the Fluke Continues  212. The One Where Sirius Picks Out A Star  213. The One With the Cathedral Star 214. The One Where Sirius Answers the Phone 215. The One Where George Gets the Girl  216. The One Where They Compare Proposals  217. The One Where Sirius Has the Man-Flu and Gives it to Zee  218. The One Where Ginny and Theo Are Kidnapped and Remus Hears Heartbeats  219. The One With the Thing After Learning the Thing  220. The One Where Everyone is in Shock 221. The One Where Zee Confirms  222. The One With the Will 

Part Eight: Sixth Year (Chapters 223-Present)

223. The One Where Remus Finally Lets Go  224. The One Where Hermione is Blind But Her Mum Isn’t 225. The One Where the Dragon’s in Trouble and George Snogs the New Bat 226. The One Where Ginny Tames Ebony and Theo Goes to Tara  227. The One With the Sovereign Chalice and Zee’s Dream  228. The One With the Party  229. The One Where Ginny Claims Her Man  230. The One Where Harry Has a Really Great Birthday  231. The One Where Harry Asks Remus For Sex Advice  232. The One With the Surfing  233. The One Where Harry Buys a Pgymy Puff  234. The One With the Naughty Dream  235. The One Where Harry’s Afraid of Grandpa  236. The One With the Race  237. The One Where Ron and Hermione Almost Fluke  238. The One Where Bill Gets a Headache  239. The One With Compass and Bad Puns  240. The One Where Harry Uses Parseltongue For Something New  241. The One Where Slughorn Is An Armchair  242. The One Where Its All Fluff  243. The One Where Draco Calls Blaise A Stupid Son of a Bitch  244. The One With the Patronus and the Lingerie  245. The One With Advanced Potion Making and World War One  246. The One With Luna’s Question  247. The One With All the Smut and Where Ron and Hermione Fluke Again 248. The One Where Minnie Freaks Out on Walburga  249. The One With the Fruit Basket  250. The One Where Percy Gets a Date and Remus Skives Off Work  251. The One With the Iron Blade  252. The One Where the Fairytale Ends  253. The One With the Golden Dagger  254. The One With Charlie’s Surprise  255. The One With The Bet  256. The One Where They Celebrate Christmas Without Sirius  257. The One With the Tantrum About Heels  258. The One Where Lucius Fucks Up  259. The One Where Tonks Plays Bad Auror  260. The One With the Goblin Potato 261. The One Where Fred is Scarred for Life  262. The One Where We Hear From Althea 263. The One Where Harry Is Told He Owes Theo A Fruit Basket 264. The One Where Neville Plants A Tree

[aforrestofstuff]

I'd like to know if you have any cooking skills headcanons!! Like, from who's able to make a absolute meal to who burns microwaved instant noodles.

I’ve done a few individual headcanons about cooking before, but I think it’s time for a refresher. You could call this... the main course.

Okay, enough of that bullshit. Here’s the hcs. Thanks for your ask, anon! ❤️❤️💞

Disclaimer: this shit is crack as fuck because I have very strong feelings about cooking lmfao. FOH don’t interact.

Tornado of Terror: She’d find a way to burn ice cream, honestly. She tries so hard (by god she tries) but her meals always come out as a convoluted mess with ingredients that have no reason being together. She eats her steaks well done and boils hamburgers. It’s a nightmare. She doesn’t really spend too much time in the kitchen, however, because she knows she sucks at cooking and because of this, makes 90% of her diet consist of takeout. But if she did spend more of her day cooking, she’d probably discover the recipe to meth accidentally. It’s that bad.

Silverfang: Stubborn old grandpa way of cooking. He’s got a handful of recipes that have been passed down for generations and he’s gonna carry those fuckers to his grave. When Garou was living at the dojo, the little bastard would try to make some changes to these recipes and Bang had to will every molecule in his arthritis-riddled body to not RKO this kid (not really, Bang wouldn’t hurt a fly). But I digress. He’s a decent cook, knows all the fundamentals and all of that shit.

Atomic Samurai: Can’t cook or bake for shit although he, of course, talks himself up like he can. The extent of his cooking knowledge is only within the realm of “shit you can roast over a campfire when your cheap ass can’t scrape together enough coin to pay the electricity bill”. But now that he’s got that S-Class paycheck and three other disciples to freeload off of, they pretty much cater to his every food-related need. He’s useless in the kitchen. Utterly fucking useless.

Child Emperor: Doesn’t know how to cook (little bastard ain’t even tall enough to reach the stove imo) but luckily he’s got that PHAT BRAIN so he can easily just build a Gordon Ramsey bot 3000 to replace his incompetence in the kitchen. His diet consists of Dino nuggets and microwaveable noodles so it’s not like he’s doing the world a great disservice by not learning how to cook properly.

Metal Knight: Same as Child Emperor except he’s a rich bastard and programs his bots to make that fancy shit with only the finest ingredients. He’s got enough cash from doing black market tech trades and building up his robo-army that this motherfucker could snort caviar for fun. He’s a real pompous asshole about it.

King: His mom taught him to cook a few things, nothing serious. He’s one of those dudes that doesn’t really know how to make much, but the few dishes that he does know how to cook are fucking BOMB. He’s got a cast iron skillet for making pancakes and everything, bitch is already halfway to being a chef himself. Other than that, however, he’s a ramen monster. His blood is practically pre-packaged bone broth.

Zombieman: I’ve said this in a previous hc but he’s a damn good cook. One problem though: he only knows how to make single servings of everything because he eats alone almost all the time. He specializes in meats. Bitch is a carnivore. He bought himself a set of those 500-dollar butcher knives so he can carve up cuts like a monster. He hemorrhages cash into fancy wood chips so he can get that smoky flavor juuuuust right. He’s got an Outdoor Chef setup on his patio. My mans is living the DREAM.

Drive Knight: He can eat but does he really need to? His cooking expertise is popping a new battery in. There you go.

Pig God: Oh my god if this man’s kitchen isn’t Michelin-Star quality. He eats a lot and he cooks a lot, it’s only natural. He’s got an indoor grill and pot chandelier and buys industrial-sized buckets of pickles and roast beef by the cow and— okay he just has a lot of food, alright? And he’s got that PHAT S-Class paycheck so my boy probably has a whole walk-in fridge just to put all the fucking food he eats. Bonus points if he hires a dishboy to work and a contractor to implement a three-sink dish station with “Clean-Rinse-Sanitize” stickers slapped on the steel, lol. But yeah, he cooks for 500 people at a time because he eats enough for 500 people at a time. Gotta maintain that figure, you know what I’m saying?

Superalloy Darkshine: He has. Oh my god— he has a full shelf dedicated to just. DOZENS OF JARS of whey protein. He has two blenders: one for fruit smoothies and one for protein shakes. His kitchen? Spotless. He knows how to cook and he eats like a bodybuilder (because he is one, duh) so he’s got that fridge STOCKED at all times. He cleans like he’s getting paid for it because nothing feels better than wiping down a gas stove until that bitch is spotless. However, his taste is garbage. He can throw down in the kitchen but does it taste good? No. Sometimes the ultra-healthy alternative to something isn’t always the greatest. He’s grown accustomed to putting zucchini in his cakes and almost damn well likes the texture of it, but don’t invite this guy to the potluck because he WILL show up with a vegetable nightmare that’s sure to make even vegans gag. Sorry bud, but nobody likes soy bacon.

Watchdog Man: furry ass.

Flashy Flash: I’ve said this before in a previous hc, but he’s pescatarian. He grew up on a coastal town before being sold of to the ninja village like a goddamned carpet and now fish is the only meat he eats. His cooking ability is about as good as one would expect from a homesless ninja. Like Atomic Samurai, he can throw it down over the campfire and still find a way to make a decent dish (in both presentation and taste) despite having limited knowledge and resources to work with. Bitch can whip up a five-star meal with some branches, a fish, and half a carrot like it was second nature. That’s about it though. He’s useless in an actual kitchen.

Genos: It’s canon. He’s a housewife. He only knows how to make the select few dishes that play an integral part in Saitama’s diet, though (because Genos can eat but he doesn’t really need to, so he only does it when he and Saitama are sharing a meal). Those dishes include things like: actual garbage. He cooks shit food. It’s not his fault. Saitama just eats like a fucking twat. There’s rats that live in the dumpster outside the restaurant I work in that have a better diet than him. Genos just works with what the poor bastard’s got and has gained a pretty mediocre grasp on cooking because of it. If he wanted to, though, he could easily be the best chef in all the land. Too bad he’s more focused on being an ultra-powerful speed demon.

Metal Bat: Tries his absolute best to cook healthy meals for him and Zenko when he almost always resorts to just popping a frozen pizza in the oven and calling it a day. I’ve said this before in a previous hc, but he eats his shit BURNT. Bitch like his steak well done, his yolks grey, and his chicken vaporized. The only exception to this is sushi because there really is no other way to enjoy it other than having it raw. Trust me, though. If there was a way to burn the fuck out of sashimi while still having it be sashimi, he’d find a way to do it and like it. But yeah, as I said: he sucks ass at cooking. He’s tried the tutorials, he’s bought the skillets, he’s sharpened the knives, but he just can’t fucking do it.

Tanktop Master: Same as Superalloy. They bond over gross-ass ultra-healthy recipes that only they enjoy. The Tanktop Gang loves him but they always kindly refuse to eat over at his house because they know he’s gonna try to make them ingest a broccoli loaf or some shit. He’s not too strict about his diet, though. He’ll chill out and have a pizza every once and a while, but only when he’s hanging out with the homies.

Puri-Puri Prisoner: He has a job in prison where he helps out in the kitchen for seventy-five cents an hour, but that’s about the extent of it. He’s got the bare basics down and could put together a decent meal for date night if he really tried (and had a damn kitchen to work with). On top of that, he can throw down some tasty prison food recipes, hand-crafted from the brick box itself. Ramen pad Thai, anyone?

Amai Mask: he’s rich as fuck, why does he need to cook? Bitch hired a chef and now all he does it drink skim milk and eat food from the top shelf. He couldn’t fry an egg if his life depended on it. Poor bastard doesn’t even know what a whisk is. And don’t even get me started on how much of a slob he is. The ten-minute process of making a single plate of spaghetti will have his kitchen in such a disgusting state that it’ll take him and a trusty Mister Clean Magic Eraser five hours just to clean it up. That is, if he even has the basic human decency to pick up after himself. He’ll probably just hire someone to do for him and then tip them a crisp 100-dollar bill for their troubles, only to make an even worse mess tomorrow.

Iaian: I’ve said this before in a previous hc, but yes: he can cook. It’s nothing special. He’s got a suburban dad sense of cooking where he, like King, can only make a select few dishes but makes those dishes taste magical. He’s got 0 utensils and shit kitchen to work with (because Kami’s place is probably like, centuries old on account of him still being a Samurai), but boy can Iaian whip up a feast like no other despite all that. It’s all protein-packed flavor bombs that look simple in comparison to, say, Zombieman or Metal Knight’s food, but it still tastes good all the same. Kama eats off of his plate all the time and it used to annoy him but they’ve grown so close that they might as well share forks at this point.

Okamaitachi: Can’t really cook, but they are a baking god. I don’t know much about baking but I know they’ve got a cupboard dedicated to their plethora of sourdough starters. They buy yeast by the pound and make enough bread to feed entire armies some days. Whatever the gang doesn’t eat, they donate it to the local homeless shelter and make it a habit to go out of their way performing good deeds that don’t always involve sword fighting (something Kami insists he instilled into them via his teachings— which is bullshit. Kama is just naturally good-hearted and sweet).

Bushidrill: Can’t cook or bake for shit but like Atomic Samurai and Flash, can throw it down on the campfire. Don’t let this man near any turkeys or pigs because he will spitroast the fuck out of them.

Fubuki: Okay, not only is she a great cook but she’s as dogmatic as a coked-out head chef. She and the Blizzard Group sometimes cook together in her massive kitchen (she poured all of her measly paycheck into it because by god, if her apartment doesn’t have a kitchen fit for a chef then it’s not worth living in), and she’ll be barking orders like a damn crow. She’s got the two-grand knife set, cast-iron everything, bronze accents on the sink, and the ability to deglaze a pan without starting a fire. She’s a natural. If she cooks for you, then that’s how you know she likes you. All in all, her food tastes and looks great. She’s a bit low on funds on account of being only Class-B, so she sometimes takes little shortcuts when plating her dishes, like using celery leaves in place of parsley and all that jazz.

Saitama: I’ve already said that his diet is absolute shit and part of that is due to being poor, but I will show mercy and say that he’s a decent cook. He only makes what he knows he’s gonna like and doesn’t leave any room for experimentation unless his budget allows it (which isn’t often). His kitchen only has the bare essentials. Genos has offered to buy him more equipment and even renovate the damn thing for him but Saitama refuses each time because then he’d have a bigass kitchen just for making a poor man’s omurice, and that would be a waste. His talent, though? Making a perfect omelet. He can fold the egg like a sheet with no tears and no brown spots. It tastes heavenly.

Mumen Rider: Ultra-safe in the kitchen. He doesn’t even own a knife sharpener because he’s clumsy enough to know he’ll cut himself the moment he even tries to use it. His pot handles all have coverings and he’s watched all of the food safety and fire safety videos out there. He could give a goddamned seminar on it. Food-wise, he’s a decent home cook. Nothing special. He does, however, share Superalloy and Tanktop’s nasty habit of over healthy-ing everything to oblivion and making it a tasteless, vegetative mess. It doesn’t matter if you invite him to the potluck or not because he’ll bring a cauliflower pizza anyway and y’all better fucking enjoy it or he’ll start crying.

Sonic: The same as Flashy Flash, minus the pescatarianism. He’d butcher a pig without blinking an eye, and often uses his katana in cooking (even though it poses like, 87 different safety hazards and is most definitely health violation). He can forage quite well and has taken a liking to wild mushrooms and berries over the years. It’s gotten so natural to him that he now knows by heart the specific time of year in which the wild berries are ripest, and which species of salmon inhabit certain streams on any given day.

Garou: Would burn water. End of story. His cooking is so bad and dangerous that everyone thinks he’s an arsonist when he really just starts fires on accident. Don’t let this fucker near a stove, for the love of god.