#but gender gets me especially hard!
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Tbh I am trying very hard to avoid double standards with how I perceive media, especially if it is about relationship. Like for example... Everyone remembers Alphyne? The ship from Undertale that was soooooo cute... right?
However, imagine if Alphys was a man. In that scenario, I don’t think the ship would fly just as good because... Let’s admit it, Alphys is a very weird person. Clingy, nerdy, desperate. If Aphys was a man, people would say he’d be a creep for thinking about Undyne constantly, naming variables after her, drawing her at the margins of his notes, writing fanfic about him and her in domestic situations... People would switch from endearing to "look at this incel being gross about women".
And like, yeah some gender things are applicable, but... until when? Until when we are going to milk this ‘b-but MEN have PRIVILEGE that women DON’T so women being creepy/weird/dangerous is cute lesbian antics whereas men doing this is perpetuation o-of the cycle!!!’ cow? What IS the better time to start being more egalitarian than right now?
Using this particular example, there are three potential ways:
1) Both, if Alphys was male and if she stays as female character, situations are fucked and should not be presented as the cute ship Toby made it be (kinda cringe, no nuance to life but okay?)
2) Both, if Alphys was male and if she stays as female character, situations are okay and kinda adorable (also kinda meh but less so, keep in mind that Undyne ends up admiring Alphys’ passion + they both end up being happy)
3) Regardless of gender, recognise that this dynamic is strange (if not dangerously close to problematic) - whether they are lesbians, whether Alphys was male, whether they were both gay men, whether Undyne was a male and Alphys was female. But yet it is allowed to exist! Some people are fucking cringe to say it the nicest way. And yet some people find their passion endearing. And most importantly - in the media, anything is allowed to exist if this serves the core message of the media! The best way in my opinion.
Basically, I can’t stretch this enough. The best way to ‘check’ your gay ship is to speculate as if to, if it was hetero. If something changes drastically - there are things to consider in my opinion. I feel like we cannot milk ‘male privilege’ cow FOREVER and at some point, equally weird/scary/manipulative behaviour should be perceived through the same lense regardless of the groups involved.
#fandoms#alphyne#fandomry rambles#disco horse#you can probably say by now that i am a raging egalitarian#i am doing my darnest to make sure i perceive a thing all the same regardless of the goups involved#but gender gets me especially hard!#since as a woman i know how much shit we are excused for which gets men absolutely destroyed#and like no? destroy both or none!#and the 'b-but- but PRIVILEGE!!!' card can only be played for so long.#until when? is the question#why delay equality for another day?#violent throwback to ariadella discourse#adella is the same crazy + blood purist as alfred and should stay away from arianna!#unless you make a point that weird ass ship works#but then so does alfred x annalise or alfred x crow#ship being two women doesn't mean it is free from any and all moral issues!#have you ever met a woman????? heeeelooooo????? we are HUMAN BEINGS not perfect angels free of all sin!!!!#fuck you for reducing us to 'by default perfect and pure relationship'#take it from me kids: avoid double standards#saying this as 25 years old person (aka old person that wasted their best part of life HEEEEEELP ;-;)#dfdsfsdf
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what if they where T4T?! What then?
#TMNT#TMNT 2012#casey jones 2012#that episode where Casey said I liked being a girl really expected me to ignore the comment?#no#raphael hamato#2012 raph#rasey#I mean you don’t have to ship them to appreciate the concept#idk raph has short trans man vibes I love him#toxic masculinity is him trying to act the part in a house of males#he’ll get over it dw#though I do like cos man raph dressing as a fairy princess and having feminine qualities#I also love trans man raph struggling to accept his more traditionally feminine behaviour#especially when they are only exposed to these gendered roles through old media#these two go out and beat up transphobes for a romantic date x#Raphs not got any trans stuff on because he doesn’t need to explain who he is to anyone his family knows#oh I tried so hard not to scratch and bruise them up too much#but I still can’t draw people#sorry Casey’s heads too big I’m learning#really like the shades of green on Raph though#also Raphs names always been raph splinter was a ninja he doesn’t know how to sex frenshly mutated pet turtle tots#OH QUICKLY I AM LOVING LATINA CASEY SO MUCH#these two spray paint graffiti in every ally and drop one trans or personal cultural significance reference in each#trans casey jones#trans raph#lgbt hc
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fucking hate it when people who are hateful little bigots make posts that are completely irrelevant to the thing that they are hateful cunts about and those posts are actually really good but i know they want me personally actually dead and in the ground so i cant be like Yeah
#red rambles#terfs stop making posts forever challenge but also especially can you not do posts that make a perfectly salient point about like#people refusing to engage with languages that aren't their own bc i KNOW that's going to be an in-road to 'transgender is just an american#concept and theres no other cultures with more than two genders' (factually untrue) 'and thats why transphobia is the only#globally acceptable movement' (hateful bigoted trash nonsense)#but like americans refusing to even make the slightest attempt to understand anything in any language that isnt english drives me insane#Google translate is right there also if its six words long and four of those words are english loanwords or cognates i do expect you to jus#use your brain and get with it lmao. its not hard#i was talking about this with a friend like a month ago. how it drives me insane how some of the people around me just refuse to pick jack#anything up and get with it
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very compelled by elsters gender both in a transmasc and transfem way bc well elster transmasc lesbian? beautiful wonderful 10/10. she is a robot whose body was made to fit the standards of what people consider a woman to look like, as is the case with most other replikas, so once she starts being treated more like a person of her own instead of just a worker robot, its fun to think of her chafing against it. on the other hand theres elster who was made to look like a woman/her neural pattern is copied from a woman, but is still treated like an object thats only there to do the job. shes referred to by others as 'it' in a dehumanizing way altho not purposely degrading bc they dont consider her a person enough to see this as cruel to her in any way. and slowly she ends up regaining her personhood and a concept of gender that feels right, as much as it can, considering the circumstances
#its complicated right. bc i dont think replikas would consider this much but also idk they are conditioned not to#elster being with ariane who disobeys the rules of what youre Not supposed to do with an elster replika clearly ends with her regaining mor#of a personal identity and willingness to like. make her own choices that arent orders#dont tell me about how this game is not about gender i know. its impossible for me to see a robot character and Not think about gender#especially in this case where theyre so clearly gendered#but still they are almost exclusively referred to as units and replikas and model names#i think falke is the one who actually gets she pronouns in reports? and most of it is by adler who is also a replika#anyway i think its very fun how all these robots are so clearly gendered but also not at the same time#which to me makes the concept of elster choosing to think of herself as a woman also very trans#she is made to look like one she is not meant to Be one#and its hard to say she would think of this bc we rarely get elster think of herself at all#theres two instances i can think of where she refers to herself#txt#signalis#yes u can use it pronouns in a normal not derogatory way but u know thats what was intended in the game
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me: yeah i didn't project too badly onto taob haha *sees a quote from taob randomly on a tiktok webweave about girlhood*
#HELLO?????? yeah zuko they girlhooded you. yeah no they transed your gender#idk if this makes sense but ur coping mechanisms are just sooo she/her#like do you have any idea how baffling this was like no tags no search no nothing it was just there by sheer luck#i saw it was a webweave about girlhood and i was like ohoughhee this will be good#got a few slides in. hello i recognise thAT FUCKING QUOTE WHAT IS HAPPENING#like it's such a niche quote and out of context like it was it could have been from ANYTHING#AND it wasn't credited which i'll get to in a second#but honestly i felt like a mother identifying her child through something incredibly niche like a single freckle or some shit#bc i was like 'this is such a nondescript quote and isnt a big enough moment for me to remember vividly and yet somehow i Just Know'#and low and behold i double checked with a cheeky ctrl+f on taob AND I WAS FUCKING RIGHT#WHAT THE FUCK#im a tad fuming there was no credit like the person used like 12 images and only 3 of them are Non-Tumblr Writing Quotes#and NONE got credited#like i get it's hard enough to get art credited but i feel with artists there's still a general conensus that you're SUPPOSED to tag them#but with writing people honestly just treat it like it's free real estate and the thing is it kinda IS especially if it's fanfic#but also..... why would you not just say who wrote that? like you clearly like it enough to put in ur little slideshow#so why not give credit where credit is due. annoying. bc now im like if this happened by pure fucking chance#then how many times has this happened when ive literally been totally unaware of it?#how many times have MY WORDS just been flung about tiktok without any acknowledgement that i wrote them?#idkkkk just how writing especially amongst tiktokers is treated as a lesser or watered down artform#that doesn't require the decency given to 'actual' art. i might just be being cynical bc i dont like tiktok tho lol#like girl (taob) what the hell are you doing at the devil's sacrament#taob
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im gonna answer the other ask later but TRANSFEM SCARY I WAS. ALSO THINKING HBBBGNN
#willy goes both ways abt such things bcus. one he is a misogynist and a homophobe or at least was on earth. obviously#and he still holds you know that. hypermasculine toxic mindset as of s1 based on the uhhh#“overly feminine namby pamby” whatever he says#(kicking myself for not having it memorized)#but i assume that he encountered more variable things in the forgotten realms that may have made him more normal abt. gender variance there#god okay i. hes not. he has an opinion of “you can be a freak if you want whatever. ill play pretend with you. ill tolerate it.”#i really like transmasc ron for similar reasons.. of.... especially when they meet in the cabin where hes cooking fish#and willys like “thats right get some bass in your voice boy !!”#like i know its just regular like. ron isnt masculine enough. but it reads very sarcastic....#“get some bass in your voice” like . you wanna be a boy so bad okay. ill humor you. hahahah. man up then.#um but transfem scary i like a similar. thing. of.... tolerating her being a girl and playing along but always being.#kind of chiding about it.#im so worried were not on the same pagw#which is fine obviously but i get so shy abt when. someone offers me headcanons that i dont agree with and i have to be like#“hahaha yeah whatever you say” like i cant say anything back cus its Wrong to me. BUT.#god though yeah her. visibly being hard around him & its both deeply sort of gross but very flattering to him like. i can work with this...#i think of him as a. opportunist. hes not into cock & not into kids really. dwindling upwards of teen girls but eh.#so when a cute troubled teen girl is literally. offering herself up to you at your feet man its like. why would i say no !! ♡#hes more into taking advantage of her than any of her personal details you know. like her as a person doesnt really. matter. who cares#shes available and stupid and looking to him for advice and validation.#sorry again i havent LISTENED TO ANY OF THIS. I CAN BE WRONG#didnt anthony make the joke abt willy not being brave enough to try pegging. maybe this is his chance#who said that. who. said that#you really want to manipulate a teen girl then you humble yourself and suck her cock and shes yours forever.#im crazy. im crazy#.dxt#scary
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anybody else like it when aroace men
#aspec spaces just tend to lean so heavily towards women n more agender-adjacent nb folks which! very cool! no shade just sometimes is hard#to relate to on a gender level especially with certain experiences and gendered expectations around sex and romance#so anytime i see another aroace guy i have to restrain myself from turning into a full golden retriever going hi hi hi hi hi <2#like other aroace men just Get It in a way that i relate to so heavily so often. aroace men you are everything to me you are me#just think it’s neat i like dudes especially when we’re aroace it’s great. men <2
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honestly that date scene is so hilarious because asa is such a try hard loser trying to impress denji with her knowledge and then there's denji who just wanna see the cute penguins...
#asa is giving me 'try hard to look cool boyfriend' kind of energy lmao#and yeah it's also reminds me how fujimoto like putting denji in this kind of... position#where the narrative typically put a female character in#especially when someone point out denji wanting to see penguins on a date is similar to the girl in the song reze's singing#and that whole date feels like if you put asa and denji is this typical date scene but switch the usual roles#which once again proved that fujimoto is consistent with his character's personality#like yeah denji as a try hard make sense if we're gonna put him in a typical boyfriend role#but him getting excited by the penguins and yelling at asa because she forced him to look things he doesn't like is just... very him#and asa being such a try hard is so true to her character#she's awkward yet because she looks down on denji#she thinks her plan is better than his spontaneity#which... resulted in such hilarious scene#also that repetitive panels really makes it even funnier lol#but yeah anyway this is not me excusing fujimoto's other bullshit or anything but i just personally#like the way he write his characters in a way that doesn't rely much on gender expectations#which... can't really be said about many other mangakas... or even writers out there#tmi tag#chainsaw man spoilers
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the egg discourse is pissing me off so bad like what do yall don't understand in stop telling random people you know their gender better than them
#especially since half of the damn time it's seeing soemone being gnc in their corner and immediately being like AHA LOL EGG#bruh. leave people alone. this is a real person#and also like yeah I'm sorry but saying a guy is actually a woman because dude dared to do something “feminine” is counter productive#this isn't being all cute and saying you relate to something you're just telling soemone you think you know their identity better than them#just say oh I find this relatable as X gender idfk#I don't get why it's so hard to understand that some people don't want to get told what their identity is based on one random thing#this isn't fucking transphobia it's basic courtesy#idk it's annoying me
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#this might be both oversharing and being too vague rn but it's 2am and i'm emotionally exhausted#i can't believe during one of the most traumatic moments i've had in the past year i was lucky enough to have scott as my biggest supporter#the entire time as i was going through it he was so supportive giving me space to process shit and always having my back#and yet there are some people in my life who are always going to villainize him for one comment he said during that time out of context#or even if they're not ''villainizing'' him i now feel like i have to begin every sentence about scott with#''yeah we don't agree on everything but we're still friends and isn't that amazing!''#which yeah that is true and i do genuinely enjoy when scott and i disagree and are respectful about it#BUT WHY DOES THAT HAVE TO BE THE FIRST THING I SAY ABOUT HIM????#and honestly that whole experience made me agree with scott on way more than i started out with#i'm proud of how i was able to grow as a person and for the fact that it brought me and scott much closer together#but that shit i went through at my college was still traumatic. and it did change me as a person#it completely changed my relationship to activism in a way i'm not happy about bc i want to be more of an activist#but when i had someone use social justice language to justify horrible things against me it's hard not to be wary#of how hollow and performative a lot of conversations can be#and like i'll even say it. like people might get mad at me for admitting it#but that whole traumatic situation has irrevocably changed my relationship to gender as well#or at least how i label myself and how i move through these conversations#and in some ways i'm grateful for it bc i do feel like i know myself more and like i don't have to worry about what others' think#or even what other people understand#but it shouldn't have had to go down like that. and as much as the time i got to spend with scott during that time was so much fun#and such a great experience and he was truly the perfect support system during that time#he shouldn't have had to deal with that and neither should i#and the fact that scott somehow got villainized in some people's minds while the person who actually caused that trauma#is instead treated like ''yeah he was a bit misguided and made a mistake but he was probably anxious about it!! he's just a person!!''#that's never going to stop being painful. especially the idea that with the importance people put on labels#i would supposedly have more ''community solidarity'' with that asshole than a cis gay man like scott#idk i think i'm past the timeframe of that traumatic experience bc it's not consuming every day like it used to a few weeks back#but something triggered it tonight so i just need to process it. anyway shoutout to scott for being there for me i really needed it
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If there is at least one thing I can credit FE for doing better than Tales in localization, it's not trying to actively go out of their way for an entire game to avoid subtext or direct text between two men that is romantic or implied romantic. Funny when it's so present that the attempt doesn't even work; infuriating that it was attempted to begin with.
So as much as I often have issues with some of FE's localizations, at least they have a leg up on loc Tales for that.
#DCB Comments#imagine changing entire sentences and vocal tones just to try to avoid it#if anything I'd say at least in FE the locs just... keep what's there like#they could've toned Soren and Houses Yuri down and they didn't. they just kept their lines or in some cases#especially with Houses Yuri I'd say leaned into them#have to specify bc Houses Yuri got to keep his bi agenda. Vesperia Yuri had the unfortunate issue of#the loc not wanting to keep his gay and trying reeeeally hard to avoid it#including altering entire sentences to avoid any woe is them misunderstandings about men having feelings for each other#meanwhile Houses Yuri is free to call men cute and lo and behold everyone loved that for him#they removed and altered a LOT of Vesperia Yuri's personality traits#(including any ability to express real sadness or fear bc woe is them if he's not a cool edgy man)#but they also really changed his tone toward Flynn PLUS some of what they say to each other#and twisted it to make it sound like Yuri was either angry or wasn't actually emotional abt him#forget the way they brought Grant George in for the DE release and made him sound just completely DEAD with zero personality#like. I can tolerate playing Houses dubbed despite my gripes with it (story based stuff)#it didn't feel like they were trying to alter LBGT+ aspects and they even for some rly leaned into it#basically if you haven't played Vesperia Yuri is... really gay coded. the loc pretended not to notice#in fact he's queer + gay coded bc and doesn't fit male gender norms and the gacha games LOVE that with his hair/outfits#Rays mind you is JP only bc it was shut down very quickly in the west and Vesp Yuri's story in Rays is uh#basically it centers around Flynn he loses his shit to protect Flynn and they do the usual like#don't-admit-it's-gay-outright in fictional media by using the ''Yuri's important person'' shtick#but he activates a special power in the middle of utterly raging to get Flynn back from their enemies#funny thing? that game never made it to that arc. I was told in about five months the western ver would've gotten that#but in some way I'm glad it didn't bc who knows how they would've tried to spin that#It's BAFFLING to me how you can get characters in Tales like JAY but the locs shake in their boots at the idea of queer gays#but given how allergic fictional media is to admitting a male character is gay -gestures to Ike and Vesp Yuri-#I'm not surprised I'm just actually angry that the locs try to censor homosexual relationships as much as possible even when they barely ca#if anyone does know Vesp Yuri and is confused on why I'm calling him gay coded despite what the dub did with Judith feel free to ask#bc I do ship them a little bit myself! but I just recognize that canon wise I really can't see him as anything but gay-demiromantic#but again at least FE locs don't shake in their boots anymore abt same sex pairs including men (side eyes Lucius/Raven)
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#when i was in high school i played a party game with some of my classmates at a get-together where you had to rank people on questions#yearbook style awards really. whos the most handsome. who's the most annoying etc etc#i flew under everyone's radar except for the question who do you think will die a widow#i dont know. i think about that alot. because i was still so unsure of myself and my relationship to gender and sexuality#it sort of felt like everyone in the room pointed a finger at me and labled me UNLOVABLE#and sure. the events of a house party in 2017 shouldn't still effect my day to day life but its sort of hard to ignore that feeling#it wasn't an especially kind thing to leave me with when i graduated and went off to college#i never tried dating in college. i think that unlovable label sort of hung over my head for my entire formal education#i had friends who did date during college. with varying degrees of success. and im really happy for them#but i couldn't bring myself to try and put myself out there. i didnt feel like i was a suitable enough person to even attempt it#idk. then covid hit and i jjst dont enjoy meeting new people#and now im 24. my little sister has more dating experience under her belt and I'm really starting to love up to that dying as a widow omen#whatever. i dont wanna be annoying and sad on everyones feeds I know thats bad manners#but i dont talk about it and ive been thinking about it alot#ill delete this later or something. if i remember to#personal
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Yeah this is probably the lesbianism talking but like. I'm really struggling to give more than a surface-level shit about 9S. Like. I'm here for a story about women bro, get this fucking twink out of my sight
#will he grow on me?#nah probably not to any significant degree#like sorry dude but i listen to too many fucking guys in video games already#trans ur gender and then ill get invested#especially when A Lot of the dialogue you have with NPCs is spoken for you by 9S#like fr can we let the fucking woman talk?!?! in *her* game?!?!#or does the man have to do the talking to make sure she doesnt embarrass him?!?!#oh 2b is too blunt and to the point to talk to people well?#good!!! make it a character flaw!!!#im barely into the game and shes failing at hiding those emotions hard anyway#like. let her fuck up!!!#let her learn to talk to people without some fucking man instructing her!!!#sorry this turned into a rant
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psa if your family member/friend ever expresses a desire to not be touched, and you ignore them and try to hug/touch them anyway, you're a dick ❤️
#just thinking abt all the times ive told my family i Dont like being touched and they just completely ignore that and try to hug me anyway#its a Family Joke abt how i stiffen up like a board whenever someone hugs me but like....its because i Dont Want To Be Hugged#im not trying to be funny im straight up not having a good time#like idk. i love how my discomfort and ignored boundaries is turned into a joke 🙃🙃🙃#although this is the same family that never ever genders me the way i prefer so. what else did i expect lmao#anyway this is ur reminder to not hug/touch people without permission#and ESPECIALLY dont do it if they ask you not to or have set boundaries abt it in the past#and like....if y'all forget...i get that. shit's hard to remember.#but i have to remind my family Every Time and they ignore me anyway <333#winter speaks#personal#<- kinda ?? i went off in the tags but the actual post is fairly normal for a textpost from me
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Playing nothing but Bugsnax and Warframe for the rest of my life to live out the fantasy of being lovingly called a they/them unprompted by everyone who crosses my path
#I alllllways notice when they do this in a game and I know it’s just so they don’t have to put in some dumb gendered system for stuff#or record two different sets of voice lines for he and she#but it’s also literally the only time I get referred to as they & im so starved for that euphoria that it rlly hits hard#in warframe Lotus will be like ‘leave them alone!’ and I’m like. thanks mum 🥺#or Ordis will be like ‘the operator would never do something selfish! they’re far too kind and noble~!’ or smth#and then in Bugsnax everyone does it but ESPECIALLY Filbo#he will be like ‘I found this cool journalist and they’re my bestie now’ or whatever#idk man it’s almost 6am and this is definitely a silly ramble it just made me unexpectedly happy today
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when i was a kid the idea of like surprise birthday parties was so like. idk i wanted it and it never happened but now its actually like. gonna happen to me but at a really really bad time when i am going to be very stressed and whatever the surprise thing is will probably make it worse so its like. hmm. early birthday gift of being nauseous with anxiety a month in advance
#my brother had good intentions telling me but also like. i have been tearing up all night and when i tried to explain my reservations to him#i just felt stupid so its. mm. this sucks#its also weird bc like. guuuhhgg i had a weird Thing a while ago that was apparently really bad i guess#so it feels like. idk. my mother trying to 'fix' that with this. so i feel like i cant say no to it#(especially bc she doesnt know i kinda know about it)#but its also like. well. when it happens i might really really freak out badly and that would ruin things for everyone. right.#kind of feel like im stuck between a rock and a hard place here bc like i WANT to talk to my mother abt this but also again she doesnt know#that i know and i dont want her to be disappointed that my brother said something to me. even though i dont know what the surprise is#just that there is one planned#also in recent years ive realized i get i suppose anxious when people get me gifts i havent Asked for#so surprises like this arent really my thing anymore. i think when i was a kid i mostly wanted one bc in tv shows theres always a lot#of people there for it and i was a lonely child.#anyway i realize this is something of a stupid thing to complain about#in my defense i feel like a lot of things that should be 'about me'#(however self centered that sounds. it makes me wince to say trust me.)#are made to be more about other people namely my immediate family.#so like my gender isnt about me its about how my mother feels about it. and my birthday isnt about me its about other people celebrating it#again ik ik its a stupid complaint. just saying that because of that *points up* which ive been feeling for nearly 10 years now#its all a bit of a tender bruise. emotionally speaking. for me.#personal
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