#but i guess thats what happens when you work on a thingy for 4 years fjsjf

[ganondoodle]

Hello 👋

Swallowing my nerves at last to send you an ask! I was just wondering, what inspires your designs? Are their inspirations in stuff like movies or games? Or just things you come up with yourself?

i .. honestly its kinda hard to tell, sometimes i just randomly think of something, like some detail, or color combination and try to incorporate that into a design somehow; it can come from anywhere, like the color scheme of a pithaya/dragonfruit is something i have been wanting to make a design with for ages but havent come up with anything good in all those years ;O;

im a very easily fascinated by color, espeically in nature, like sometimes i just stop and stare at something like i froze in time bc i just woooooooooooooah color! i probably look like a weirdo doing that though

its really hard to pinpoint anything specifically, the most is probably .. other artists? i guess? which always makes me nervous bc my memory is shit in most areas of life and i worry myself to pieces whether i unintentionally "stole" an idea and just dont remember and think it was my own, it goes further that sometimes i see something that makes me want to draw a similar concept but dont bc i dont want to 'steal' even if that couldnt be further from my intention (have been accused of that before ..)

that said for my ocs specifically .. most are rather old and have just kinda evolved out of their awkward first iterations (shargons first iteration was a hauro-howl- copy that was really just some human covered in feathers .. another oc was once a hellboy copy but in green- havent drawn nor redeisgn them in ages lol), the biggest inspirations for them is a mix of animals, bonus if you dont see them often- im a big shark, whale and sea creatures in general nerd so i tend to take from them as a priority but always trying to be less directly animal and mostly just .. features that work together

Eadrya is one of the newer OCs- i started to write but then looked at my folders and oh they are from 2017 .., i even made a design timeline for them how much they, and my art, have changed back in 2020, so thats also way outdated now lol (they apparently started as a whale .. thing? its like a pokemon evolution lol)

this is them now (i like this sketch still, though shargons design is now also outdated lmao)

this ones from early 2023 so also outdated now but you get the point

for demons i try to be a bit more wild on shapes and colors while still adhering to the rules of how they work (humanoid form, demon form, animalistic, one element each and more or less made to fit that, 4 arms is very common, look to be bost scary and wild but also something that would make you stop in tracks and stare in awe and fear if you crossed paths)

often times designs just kinda .. happen, i have maybe the idea ok i wanna make something with a white and red pattern also moose or those big horned cows are cool and kinda scary so maybe sth akin to that (though this one is technically a redesign too- its also pretty much entirely different)

for non demons but still non human i go for a much more restrained design, mainly inspired directly by an animal and giving the color scheme a good spin, plus adding unconventional body shapes, like ki'ita is also a good example, her old idea was just orca anthro pirate and just by making the white green instead in her most recent redesign already adds that little spin to it

that can have its pitfalls though, as i often fall into the big arm small head small legs scheme over and over xD

alot of it is trial and error, deciding on the colors can take me hours bc im always searching for my little rule of having one contrast color that shows up in very few places to draw attention to it (like with Eadrya its those bright yellow eyes and thingy at their tail)

and that is all about myy own ocs, when its fandom stuff it works kinda similar though, either in the connections i wanna draw or just thinking it further- like how deities in destiny work also just kinda .. happened like an ever derailing train

like for demise i was at first really just im gonna give him horns bc horns are cool and he got those on the starting mural in the game- so how his hair work? well maybe it isnt hair actually and just unbound energy, im making him a deity too and fit hylias design to his so, yeah, then so how does it work, ok he gotta have a skeleton still, but what if his entire actual body is made up of pure magical energy with its core in the ribcage? with the core in the ribcage >:3c and the scales you see are just like cooled down lava as an armor bc his thing is fire and earth !! the normal blood? is a thin layer of skin imiated from mortals to keep the scales together and flexible so if he ACTUALLY gets hurt hed bleed magic that looks more like lava and any normal blood you see is just the armor- so why does he have a skeleton still instead of being just energy? maybe its gotta be bound to something OH and what if all of the deities started as mortals like a mirror to the trio later on and the gods cannot have direct influence to the worlds so they needed a right hand that is neither god nor mortal but both by killing a mortal by whatever their element will be (demise burned, hylia drowned etc) and their skeleton and spirit is kept but put into a body of magic- OH what if their spirit core is like almost piloting their bodies like a mech in a way bc if youd look close youd see that every strand of magic is actual a hand of their spirit so it makes it more weird and other bc hed be able to reach out with thousands of burning claws of all shapes and sizes like the beheaded forest god at the end of mononoke- SO if hed lose and arm or something all those strands would untangle and rearrange his bones back together-OH MY GOD the whole armor idea works so well for ghirahims dark armor so what if demise had two swords once and lost one and since has forged an armor similar to his own for ghirahim out fo fear of losing him t---

and that all is a process that happens over several weeks and months not rarely while i am drawing something mindlessly and suddendly *have a thought* and omg that makes so much sense-

so "what" inspires my designs? an ever derailing train of thought about making cool thick monsters that arent the evil thing to get rid of for once? cool color schemes? idk it just kinda happens??

[thewhizzyhead]

Hey, your misfits musical thing sounded super super interesting! Any other details about it that you're willing to share? Minor plot points? Gay Relationship stuff? :0

oh boy this is gonna be long *cracks knuckles* here we go

SO FUN BACKSTORY BEFORE I GET TO THE PLOT PARTS TJXJJS: my sunday school has a tradition of um holding productions of christmas musicals every december. My teachers would find american christian christmas kiddy musicals productions on youtube and then basically um translate all the dialogue to Filipino (the songs stay in English) and have us um reenact the whole thing and ngl it was a lot of fun! I even acted as some of the main roles there when I was like 10-13 so um I can kinda say that I have some experience with musical theatre YAYYY (jk jk that doesn't really count djsff).

When I was around 12-13 years old, I became obsessed with A Very Potter Musical and wondered what it would be like to make AVPM but Christmas so that my church could perform it (very silly idea but shh i was 12 and I was obsessed) and then over time a plot that Was Definitely Not Harry Potter started to form and them um here we are fjsjd so thank you Starkid for making me go down this hellhole

Oki backstory over, now here comes the very long part:

(Also um warning this musical concept involves a lot of religion talk since majority of the thingy is me criticizing a lot of the hypocrisies in religious institutions here based on my experience so um yea proceed with caution if ur sensitive to religion-related stuff)

p.s. ari i am so so sorry but this is so fucking long and definitely more than what you asked for so um yea goodluck fjxjsjf

SO BASICALLY Misfits is about 5 "narrators" - these guys serve as the "floor directors" of the show and um yea they make sure that the plot actuall happens and everything goes exactly according to the script given by the church higher ups or "producers" - who have to bring 3 teens branded by their church as "Misfits" back to Bethlehem 1 CE in order to "teach them a lesson about God" aka convert them to Christianity thus removing the "Misfits" branding. (Also they can only go back once they successfully arrive at the manger because um that's how the producers want it to be tjxjs)

I have to emphasize that although this tackles a lot of stuff related to Christianity and religion as a whole, this really isn't a Christian Musical and that this very morally questionable mission (through the power of Stage Magic and Super Powers, the Narrators essentially bring the Misfits back to the past against their will for the sake of completing their mission) goes horribly, horribly wrong very very quickly.

Throughout the course of the musical, the 5 Narrators struggle to stick to the given script and get their mission done as the 3 Misfits prove to not only be very freaking stubborn but also quite insightful as well as they bring up really good points in regards to religious hypocrisies and socially questionable, prejudiced and backward views commonly held by most religious institutions here i.e gender roles, homophobia, the demonization of science and technology at times, elitism and classism, etc etc (i can only speak in behalf of the Philippines so um yea Philippines). Overall, this is kinda a case study on as to how religion can influence and shape people's mindsets for either the better or the worse and how it is often used by the authorities to simultaneously give hope to the people (especially those of the poorer sectors wherein because of how hopeless the present seems here because a very flawed system kept in place by the exploitative privilged here, they choose to just trust in God instead and also hope that the afterlife is much much better than this shit) while also keeping them in line and like preventing them from rioting. (Church and politics undeniably go hand in hand here even though we have legislations enforcing the separation of the church and state and um yEA THIS WHOLE THING HAS BEEN VERY PROMINENT THROUGHOUT PHILIPPINE HISTORY AND WE CAN ALL THANK THE SPANIARDS but um anyways that'll be a rant for another day)

On a more personal and emotional aspect, this thingy also tackles a lot of stuff I find rather common among kids my age, especially those who had a very Christian upbringing (aka 99.9% of the philippine population tjxbdbf). There's a lot of questioning involved in regards to one's faith, sexuality, perspective and purpose in life and all that fun stuff and how oftentimes said questioning is discouraged due to the church (and ph society overall) wanting us to just like um sTICK TO THE STATUS QUOoOoO and just comply with what is seen as appropriate and godly cause anything out of the ordinary is ngl treated like it's heresy. (YES THERE WILL BE A LOT OF SELF PROJECTION HERE)

One final and important thing to note is that the show is essentially a musical-inside-a-musical in a way fjsjf I originally designed this thing to be like um produce-able on my church's stage (because they were supposed to help me produce the first version of misfits which um yea that's def not gonna happen now tjxjdv) which um kinda looks like the OG Spring Awakening Stage (and yes Misfits is very much inspired by Spring Awakening God I love that show) which is why the show is kinda stylized like a concert with handheld mics and all wherein um the 5 narrators are aware that they are putting on a show to the point of even directly addressing the audience a lot while the 3 Misfits (except for 1 which i'll get to in a bit) aren't aware that they are in a show. The three do eventually find that out and that's when all hell breaks loose to the point that the "producers" (represented by Hades-ish voices) have to intervene by literally changing and manipulating the show's setting and plot to make sure that their script gets followed and that's when the characters really try to break the show to get out of it bUT THE POINT I WANNA MAKE HERE IS THXJD keeping in mind that I had initially planned for Misfits to be produced by my church prior to the many drastic changes, the show the narrators were putting on (aka the musical-inside-the-musical) was made with the intention to pander to a Very Religious Audience. Successfully convincing people to convert to Christianity, especially those of the youth, is what many religious audiences want to see and that is exactly what the "producers" have written for the 5 "narrators and floor directors" to enact. Now don't get me wrong, I'm a Christian and preaching the Gospel and bringing in new believers isn't essentially a bad thing; if they want to believe in the religion then woo good for them! But, such preaching becomes detrimental when you take away one's agency and basically force them into Christianity by means of guilt tripping and manipulation which is sadly very much a reality here (again, a rant for another day) and a representation of such is shown here in the show where um the 3 Misfits were basically forced into this show that 5 Narrators are putting on and, through the influence of the 5 Narrators, the 3 Misfits have to decide to become "good Christian youths" for the show to conclude because that's show the "producers" have written. So when the 3 Misfits stubborness goes to the point that even the 5 Narrators start questioning the morals of their mission, that's when the show starts to go off-script and that's when the production starts to like umm "break" and whenever that happens, the "producers" start speaking to the Narrators, reminding them that they have an audience that they need to please and a message that they need to convey.

So while the Misfits (2 of them, at least, cause um the third one has um yea i'll get to him in a bit) mainly focus on figuring out what in the everliving fuck is going on (while also dealing with their um unfortunate circumstances, childhood trauma, a shit ton of guilt and the concept of salvation and self-forgiveness), the Narrators are tasked with the burden of carrying the show and making sure that the audience finds it appealing while trying to convince themselves that what the church wants them to do is "right" and what the Misfits keep telling them is "wrong" ala um Holier-Than-Thou mindset. Once they eventually start becoming more willing to see the true nature of both the Misfits and the Producers despite the fear of disappointing everyone who's watching, that's when the Narrators and Misfits all start breaking the show by going off-script and completely destroying the plot and production that the Producers have made for the audience - thus making a statement of refusing to comply with a flawed system for the sake of audience approval while also making the first step to fixing that system for the good of all.

Also fun fact: Although it'll make my job a lot harder because I am more fluent in English than in Filipino, i wanna write the thingy in both English and Filipino fjxjdf the dialogue can be Taglish but um the songs that are "part of the script" aka what the Producers want the characters to sing are in English while the songs that aren't part of the script are in Filipino; songs that are both in Filipino and in English are um i guess indicative of the struggle to follow the script while also trying to do what you believe is right (an example of a song with that style is Interpretasyon - which means Interpretation and um Ezekiel (one of the Misfits) sings in Filipino while Joshua (leader of the narrators) sings in English and um just imagine Wallflower cuz IT IS VERY MUCH LIKE WALLFLOWER GJDJNF) and um yea i kinda imagine it to be some sort of rock-pop musical concert thingy so um woo thank you pma for once again influencing my work

SO ANYWAYS UM THAT WAS LONG SO LET'S GO TO THE GAY SHIT

Okay so far 4/8 of the characters here have queerness directly related to their individual plotlines here but um yea honestly i'm tempted to make all of them queer CAUSE IT'S FUN oki so um anyways on to the character dynamics (I won't be able to include more in depth descriptions because im hungry and GOD THIS IS LONG so um yea)

June & Anna (Narrator 2) - oki so June here is one of the Misfits and she's from the poorer sectors (i'm still working on her backstory to make it more believable but um yea) and she isn't able to go to school due to having to prioritize providing for her family first. Due to a very unfortunate childhood event (one that involves Zack, another Misfit), she had to grow up fast and now appears to have a rather jaded view of the world. Anna, one of the Narrators, is the very opposite of that - she's privileged and wealthy-as-fuck and seems to be very optimisitc and friendly. However, ever since she has been blackmailed by her own churchmates for merely questioning her sexuality (true story), she became a more reserved and emotionally closed person despite her very friendly and cheerful demeanor. So when she finds out that June's music carries a lot of beautiful insight and hope in spite of her unfortunate circumstances (the two girls bond over music btw that's how Anna got June to trust in her), she becomes confused because how can June, a girl who has nothing, not even faith, still have hope that she'll be able to find some semblance of happiness while Anna, who has everything, has such a downtrodded view of the world? So um basically their dynamic will also consist of Anna checking her privilege, June explaining how good people turn against the world when the world turns against them (YES A LOT OF TALK ABOUT POVERTY AND HOW THAT IS A RESULT OF CAPITALISTIC EXPLOITATION) (yes June will talk about that a lot), and um what it means to hope with or without faith and what it means to trust another and oneself again. Oh and also lots of philosophy talk and emotional expression through music wie

Zack and Mikael (Narrator 3) - Zack, another Misfit, is a childhood friend of June and a younger stepbrother of Ezekiel (the third Misfit). After Zack and June lost contact after the 'unfortunate childhood event' (i am not sure on what exactly it'll be but in the earlier drafts a fire burned both of their homes and killed both of their dads and rn I have a song concept describing that called "Umaapoy" which means "Burns" but i dunno i'm still working on it), he became best friends with Mikael and um yea said best-friendship was Definitely Not Platonic. After a picture of them kissing was sent to not only the school principal but to basically everyone in the school, both of their parents were called to the principal's office which led to both of the boys moving to different schools to um mitigate the damage i guess gjdjd while Zack's mom eventually learned to accept her son's sexuality, Mikael um wasn't so lucky - I'd say he went through um a lot of religious intervention almost akin to conversion therapy which then um yea has caused him a lot of internalized homophobia and um yea Mikael and Zack haven't been able to talk or even chat in about 3-4 years so imagine Mikael's surprise when he found out that his mission involved Zack - who does not and cannot recognize Mikael because welp not part of the script. Zack, a bit braver now, takes a liking to Mikael and wants to at least be friends with him partly because he somehow finds him really familiar while um Mikael tries to maintain a strictly professional demeanor out of fear that Zack will recognize him and out of fear that he'll fall in love with Zack again. Their dynamic will also include um learning to trust one another and oneself again (like June & Anna's dynamic), to learn how to be brave and be sure in one's beliefs (Mikael um doesn't really speak up that much out of fear while Zack is not only outspoken, but is also an activist - this is another one of the many reasons why Zack is branded as a "Misfit" aside from the fact that he's gay and um yea Ezekiel spends almost 2 minutes berating Joshua for this out of pure anger and disgust), and what it means to reconnect with the past and to forgive oneself (although that is much more expounded upon with June & Zack's dynamic).

Ezekiel and Joshua (Narrator 1) - SAY HI TO THE RILEY AND CAIRO DYNAMIC WOOOOOOO but yea ari dude your analysis on Riley and Cairo (and Kate) being the Main MAIN characters and everything about cheerwives gave me a lot of think about and SO I PUT IT IN HERE WOOOOOO so basically um Ezekiel is the older stepbrother of Zack and the first of the 3 Misfits to figure out that they are in a show. He figures this out because he recognizes Joshua aka the leader of the Narrators aka his former churchmate and ex-bestfriend. He also realizes that they are in a show because he recognizes their tricks which he knew about because he had participated in these missions before as one of the Narrators (Joshua and Ezekiel are older than the rest of the cast and the other narrators don't know that Ezekiel was once a Narrator as well). Due to an Unfortunate Incident (that i'm still working on) 3 years prior to the events in the show, Ezekiel cut off all ties to the church but he is still viewed as this "perfect role model golden boy" which is why the 4 Narrators were shocked to find out that Ezekiel was part of their mission. Joshua, knowing that the real reason to his sudden involvement is due to "producers" somehow finding out their secret about the Unfortunate Incident, lied and told the others that he was just included to make converting his brother a lot easier, which they believed. Out of all the narrators, Joshua is the one who tries his best to stick to the script the most because he knows that if he doesn't, the true nature of that Unfortunate Incident will not only be revealed to his companions but to everyone else watching. Meanwhile Ezekiel, who doesn't know that him being involved in this mission is some sort of um penance for his involvement in that Unfortunate Incident, tries his hardest to sabotage he show by being the most outspoken when pointing out a lot of hypocrisies within religious institutions and in ph society in general (he refuses to tell the other two that they are in a show though because if that happens, he knows the Narrators, Joshua especially will um get very heavily scolded by the producers and despite everything, he still cares for Joshua a lot). I'd say that these two are the ones that push the plot the most - one wants to push the show accordingly to plan in order to please the audience and the producers and in order to not let his and Ezekiel's secret go out while the other wants to push the show off-script in retaliation against the producers (and yes the Unfortunate Incident involved the time travelling thingy which is why he really wants to sabotage this). In fact, these two have 2 duets that are basically them trying to convince the other to go along with their plan ("Interpretasyon" which means Interpretation and "Sikreto" which means secret). This dynamic involves um yea trying to convince the other to switch sides gjxjd and um reconciliation, responsibility out of guilt, and what it means to forgive oneself (forgiveness is a common theme here) and to start to heal from trauma and to not deny the existence of said trauma any longer.

NOW ORIGINALLY I REALLY DID NOT INTEND THE JOSHUA AND EZEKIEL DYNAMIC TO BE GAY BUUTT WHEN I WAS THINKING OF THE LYRICS, I REALIZED THAT OUT OF CONTEXT, IT SOUNDED VERY GAY SO UM HERE'S AN EXCERPT OF SIKRETO (still not finished writing the thingy)

Joshua: (singing to Ezekiel) (this is also the first time Joshua sings a Filipino solo so this is him breaking the script for the first time) (also um yea the translations aren't direct translations cause I wanted to make them rhyme fnxnf) (So to those who know filipino i am terribly sorry cause yup this isnt an accurate translation fjfjd)

Ang natitirang alaala ay aking binura (I have scrubbed away all the memories that may have still remained)

‘di ko na sila kilala (I don't know them anymore)

Kinalimutan na kita (I have forgotten about your name)

Ngunit ang bigat ng pagsisisi ang aking dinadala (But the weight of regret, I carry all the same)

Ang sakit sa balikat, lagi kong dinarama (I constantly feel the sting of my shoulders' pain)

Pero masasabi ko pa rin na sinusubukan kong itama (But at least I can say, I tried to right-)

Ang aking mga pagkakamali (all that's wrong)

Ikaw, saan ka pumunta? (What about you? Where in the world have you gone?)

Tumakbo ka lang at iniwan mo ako (You ran, you just ran, and left me behind)

Sa pagbubuhat ng kasalanan at sikreto (In carrying the sins and secrets, and you paid me no mind)

Pero pinapanatili ko paring malinis ang ating munting kwento (But I stillade sure I kept our little story clean)

Patuloy na sinisigurong ‘di nila malalaman ang totoo (I kept on making sure the truth would never be seen)

Alam na natin ang kwento (We already know the story)

Alam na natin ang kwentong kailangang itago (We know the story that we need to hide)

Itong munting sikreto ay kailangan burahin (This little secret that has to be erased)

Ating pagkakamali, patuloy na bubuhatin (We will have to always carry, our sins and our mistakes)

Alam na natin ang kwento (We already know the story)

Alam natin ang katotohanan ng nakaraan (We very well know the truth of the past)

Ito'y nakabakas sa isipan, ‘di natin malilimutan (We'll never forget what will remain ingrained in our minds)

At sa Diyos na lang natin mahahanap ang kapatawaran (And from only God could we find forgiveness for what we left behind)

Habang buhay bubuhatin ng konsensiya (Forever will our consciences bear the weight and carry

ang ating pagkakasala, ang kwento't sikreto nating dalawa (our sins kept in secrecy, the story of you and me)

Pero ngayon, ‘di ko alam paano pero nalaman nila (But now, I don't know how, but somehow they know)

At ngayon, dinedemanda na nila ang penitensya (And now, penitence is what they demand)

Kaya ngayon, naghihingi ako ng pasensiya (So now, patience and forgiveness is what I ask)

Sa iyo at sa kanila (From you and from them)

Sa aking gagawin at mga nagawa (for what I'll do and I've done)

Baka nga (Perhaps)

Tama nga mga sinabi mo (What you've said all this time is right)

Na ‘di tayo ang tanging may sala rito (That we aren't the ones only at fault here)

Pero ‘di ko matatakasan ang aking naging tungkulin (But I can't really escape my little role here, because)

Sana ‘di mo nakalimutan: lahat sila nakatingin (God I hope you haven't forgotten: they're all looking at us)

Lagi silang nakatingin (Always looking at us)

Kahit ano man ang iyong gawin (No matter what we do)

Tayo'y mananatili sa entablado (On the stage we shall stay)

At lahat sila nakatingi- (And the stares still won't go awa-) (He then realizes that he's on stage and Should Not Be Having A Breakdown In Front Of The Audience Because Duh and Because That's Not Part Of The Script)

SO UM YEA IN RETROSPECT SOME OF THOSE LYRICS COULD ALSO REFER TO SOME SECRET NOT-PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP THAT THE AUDIENCE DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT YET (because the Secret doesn't get revealed til much later) WHEN IN ACTUALITY IT'S ABOUT THE TRUTH BEHIND WHAT HAPPENED 3 YEARS PRIOR TO THE EVENTS IN THE SHIW AND NOT GONNA LIE,,, THEM BEING IN A NOT-SO-PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP KINDA ALSO WORKS SO I'M CONSIDERING MAKING THEM HAVE SOME ROMANTIC HISTORY TOO JDHXBSJF

Oki that's all for today hdhdh there are two more characters (narrators 4 and 5) but i'm still working on them and i kinda wanna make the both of them not cis cause WHY NOT also i have been typing this for like 6 hours now and i'm tired and hungry so tjjxjs anyways if you read to the end, I'm sending you carbonara-

[garrothromeave]

the hell is mystreet season 6??

(warning, long post ahead)

ok so before i start this

1) ive never posted shiiiit on tumblr before so watch me suffer, im just here to talk about stuff that my friends who dont know anything about aphmau have to listen to me rant about for hours on end

2) i havent seen mystreet in like years (except season 3, i watch that frequently since im laurance and shadow knight deprived) so please bear with me because i might be completely wrong on this lol. it’s just like, pointing out things i remember

3) im sure someones already talked about this but who cares

4) im gonna do this stupid thing where i just explain myself a bit at first, if you dont want to read that just skip to the part where you see “the actual thingy:” in bold and italics 

5) mild disclaimer; i am completely aware that jessica is not a professional writer. i know that she did her best to appeal to her fans, and honestly, respect for that. while this post will come off as aggressive and probably look like hate, that’s not my intention in the slightest. it’s just... intense criticism. im sure y’all probably already know that, but yeah, just stating that anyways. i do believe that jess is doing her best, and in no way do i want to dismiss any hard work she’s done. that being said; prepare for a very strongly opinionated post.

haha watch there be 10000+ typos in this making me look like a complete dumbass

ok here we go 

one of the main reasons i stopped watching aphmau back in 2017 was the mess that was season 4. like, in the first few episodes of the emerald secret, i thought “woah!! this is kinda cool, im a sucker for mystery!” because of course i was, it was something new and something exciting. the only problem i had with it at the time was kim, but that’s just because i always found her annoying and out of place. i just didn’t understand why garroth dragged her along and honestly i still don’t to this day BUT, moving on.

anyways, as the season progressed, 13 year old me was of course just “:0!!” the entire time--that is, up until the reveal of the main villain. i remember watching the episode, seeing the reveal of ein, and then stopping. like, just for a quick break, but i was still just overwhelmingly disappointed. like, and this was the time when pdh was airing and ein just got made alpha (i think?) and i had really really liked eins character in pdh. either way, that really sucked and actually opened my eyes to a lot of things.

one of the main things bein’ the fact that this was supposed to be a slice of life kinda series that decided to take a turn to a more edgy kinda approach. which, i guess i regularly wouldnt mind? but seeing as mcd was kinda bein neglected at the time it just didnt sit right with me. BUT WHATEVER, point is i stopped watching mystreet all together at the end of season 4.

like, a whole year later my brother tells me that shit’s getting intense in season 5 + 6 of mystreet, and my brilliant self decided to give it a shot--but i refused to watch all of season 5, so i only stepped in when ein made an appearance. so whenever that was, that’s where i picked up because i didnt care enough to see 

and y’know--i honestly didn’t hate it at first. in fact, i found it oddly cool. it wasn’t enough to get me into aphmau again, but it was enough to where i was intrigued. i dont know why, but i never watched the finale, so i didnt see the ending until just a few weeks ago--but back then, i thought it was neat. looking back on it however... im just so confused. 

side note: only got back into aphmau this time around because of mcd. mainly because like, i adore the first season and the first half of the second season. and being nearly 18 now, im a lot more appreciative of plot and well-written characters n junk. 

the actual thingy:

ok back on track. imma stop spilling out my story of how i got back into aphmau, and lets just skip to what rewatching mcd made me realize of season 6′s plot and shit:

-emmalyn. how the fuck does ghost even remotely exist? if she’s emmalyn as claimed, then why have we already seen emmalyn in the mystreet universe alive? look i get that creators can do whatever they want with their stories but at the same time please provide some sort of explanation good god. and maybe they did and i just havent seen it, so if there is one--let me know. but until that day imma just sit here confused as fuck

-ok so imma just be real, the whole ‘ultima’ thing is just... not great. in my opinion, anyways. like... i saw someone mention this in another post, but if this ultima stuff was like, a really big deal, why isnt it mentioned in mcd? though i suppose since its a curse of sorts, it could be later on past the time period in which mcd takes place--but even then, how did it manage to make its way into aaron’s family bloodline? 

-WHY IS EVERYONE AT STARLIGHT ITS JUST SO CONVINIENT like what happened to this place being the most expensive shit on the planet or whatever, and how the gang happens to run into like, the werewolf trio and blaze and kai and guy and nate all of these people like god damn life doesnt WORK LIKE THAT 

-im sorry but turning people into relics? thats... thats the best you could come up with? plus, like, how does that even work? in mcd it’s established that relics are separate entitles that choose their wielder, based on a ‘personal’ connection (being a descendent of a previous wielder) or if they’re a good match personality and (i think?) moral wise. so the whole turning-people-into-relics doesnt make much sense to be honest. 

-irene really over here using her god powers to only keep her friends alive like god damn not a great god if you ask me 

-can i talk about how incredibly predictable aphmaus death was? like i just kinda sat there waiting for it to happen and when it did i literally went “haha! wonder when she’ll be revived” because god forbid we actually kill off characters 

-when aphmau + demon warlock fought in the irene dimension there was no passage of time whatsoever in the real world whiiiiiiiiich really bothers me because they fought in there for at least a few minutes

-speaking of aphmau and the demon warlocks fight does it bother anyone else that it had to be aaron who took over the fight?? like we get it hes the big protector blah blah blah but god damn it wouldve been cooler if aphmau had fought this battle as her. aaron fighting this battle was so underwhelming

-...love. like, thats the only thing thats needed to break out of a forever potion? love? LIKE YEAH, GOOD GUYS GOTTA WIN SOMEHOW, but its just so cliche and overdoneeee

-oh yeah and also when travis went bonkers and became the demon warlock or whatever, why’d he only take over katelyn and garroth?? like, zane had been influenced by the potions in the past as well? DONT GET ME WRONG--i do love some good brother edge, but uh, the demon warlock was just bein kinda a dumbass by not possessing zane too just sayin’

-can aaron please go to fucking jail for mass murder now like holy shit, he just got sent home on a fuckin boat. also why did blaze forgive him for killing him thats not even remotely realistic. then again, nothing in mystreet has ever been realistic when it comes to characters and motives and personalities, (cough katelyn being actually abusive and travis being an actual pervert) but yknow whatever

-katelyn and kawaii chan literally added nothing to the plot whatsoever. like lets be real, katelyn lost her personality the moment season 5 started and kawaii chan just kinda sits there :I

-ok im sorry this was bound to come up but cmon guys imagine laurances potential if he was in season 6 like god damn this is beyond maddening. AND YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A REALLY REALLY COOL PARRALLEL?? IF IT WAS LAURANCE WHO SNAPPED GARROTH OUT OF HIS MIND CONTROL THING, because it would mimic laurance’s speech to get garroth to snap out of his rage in season 1, episode 100 of minecraft diaries. like how fuckin rad would that have been? missed opportunity 

-also?? why does kim/ghost know magicks?? like, if i remember correctly, emmalyn is a scholar--not someone who knew magicks. i mean, i guess research? study?? but its been established that knowing how magicks works =/= being able to use magicks. i dunno, just doesnt seem right i guess. maybe its explained, i wouldnt know (yes i know that makes me look like a dick leave me alone)

-melissa should have stayed dead. LIKE, NO, ITS NOT AS SIMPLE AS “haha it takes more than a few bullets to kill me”??? look ive got nothing wrong with melissa (cough lie cough) but yknow it would have just been cool a character... stay dead? for once? its just too fuckin cliche that shes alive god damn

-can i also just say the only good thing that came out of season 6 was travis’ dads sacrifice like damn that made me actually sad

-howww was lucinda turned into a relic. or yknow, anyone else? like im sure they explain it better in the actual show i just dont remember, but its just that easy? turning anyone into a relic? granted, a normal person wouldnt be able to produce a good relic, but idk man. IM JUST SAYING; that the only really powerful relics that aphmau should have been able to wield is the one that aaron + zane produced because shad relic and esmund relic moment. lucinda isnt even like, connected to a divine warrior. ALSO, another point, if its seriously that powerful of a relic getting one from just a magic user like lucinda, why go through the trouble? i mean i guess ofc youd want the “all powerful” one that the ultima produces but i mean damn whats the point

-ok this is just going to bother me but in one of the episodes (i think might have been in season 5 actually) where that like, guardian dude was chasing aphmau and zane and at one point they split up and the dude just chuckles at zane diverting paths and goes under his breath “youre not the important one here”, suggesting that aphmau somehow is? first of all, id argue that any ro’meave is significantly more important than aphmau was, especially not knowing much about her other than that shes with aaron. i might be missing some bits an pieces, but if i was that dude id forget about aphmau and go after zane 

-killing off derek for shock factor sucked, and i know the moment was supposed to be really sad because like “oh :( aarons dad is sacrificing himself for his son” but lets be real dereks still was a shitty father and i dont think his reasons for doing what he did was very good at all

-less about plot or more like: why the absolute fuck did the gang bring kim along instead of, oh i dont know, a life-long friend? like, laurance or dante maybe?? im sure its explained, i never saw aphmaus year or most of season 5, but god DAMN id hate to be apart of this friend group AND GOD LIKE, imagine reconnecting with an old friend who ends up getting closer to your best friends and taking priority in their lives over you (cough laurance) like god damn lol

-im just going to preface this one with: i dont remember everything that’s happened, so if im wrong i apologize in advance--but (you actually can correct me if im wrong and please do) didnt like, irene reincarnate her friends in order to give them better lives? I DONT KNOW IF THIS IS TRUE, ITS JUST WHAT I REMEMBER--however, if im correct, then:

a. why the hell would she bring back someone like zane, or gene, or ivy, etc.

b. why the hell do they all have the same exact names? first and last? again, im aware that the whole mystreet+mcd tie wasn’t originally supposed to be there, but i dont think that means such a coincidence can be excused? its just a bit much if you ask me.

c. why the hell is the fact that (as much as i literally hate this) aaron is a decedent of shad being ignored? like, you’d think that something like this would be something thats actually important, or something the demon warlock couldve taken advantage of. or are we completely erasing every other connections to divine warriors besides aphmau + irene? because even if irene did reincarnate them or do whatever it is she did, does she even have the power to sever the connections between them and their ancestors? my guess is, no.

d. speaking of irene why on earth was aphmau able to talk to/see irene, they’re literally the same person are they not? did she like, fuckin reincarnate herself without actually doing it?? BUT--i will give it to them, the demon warlock did refer to aphmau as something along the lines of being “one of the 3 parts of her broken soul” or something like that. however, my point still remains. also what are the other two did i miss that or is it never explained

now; if irene in fact did not ‘reincarnate’ her friends then please ignore that little bit right there :)

but yes, those are a few of the problems i have with season 6 off the top of my head. i would go into like, season 4 and 5 more as well, but i honestly didnt feel like it. at some point i might go into other things, like how important laurance could have been to the plot of these later seasons, or HELL, even dante. i might also go into what could have made season 4, 5, and 6 actually good--maybe... a rewrite? perhaps? but im getting too far ahead of myself, so i just leave you with this for now.

and i know that as soon as i post this 15 more things are just going to pop into my head BUT im going to try and not edit this post because why stress myself with that even more

anyways thank you for coming to my tedtalk 

[worldsendgirlfriend]

should i start like tagging these or puttign them under read mores No actually i dont want 2 readmore mysefl fuck censorship listen to psychotic voices ‼️

i dont wnst to tag them either jus personally. but if any of u want me to then i wil. so like. lmk if u do. onto the mental health section of daily dabiseimeivector times

looks at todo list 4 last nite i made myself in city block.... ok i wrote this then checked and i actually did get like, most of it done and made progress on the main thingy so i guess it wasnt too wasteful a night. but i Definitely got too distracted i couldve done a lot more and like i wanted 2 do a lot more. perhaps sth like intermittent lil small alarms just 2 remind me how much time has passed.... why does time in general feel so backwards for me. once a day passes it couldve been yesterday or two and a half weeks ago or like seven months ago. when i say "recently" in any context thats code for "i have no fucking clue but it probably happened like?? ? within the past... six months.. ??? ?? if not then this year for sure.........?????". nd when im not paying attention to time But specifically depending on what im doing, it either feels like its been hours and its only been like maybe 30 min or its been around 30 mins and its been almost like 4.5 hours.

when i was in Hell On Vector Stim Drug Technique period i was certain i was losing time just like bc it just Started happening bc i kept finishing so late at work despite being Sure i was going at my usual speed if not faster. Yeah, i know, but i wasnt clearheaded at all for that whole time so it Felt like i was normal even tho my body constantly in the process of crashing hard but molly nd addys both kept hooking its corpse up to the back of a wagon and yeah pulling it along but also thru the dirt and hitting rocks and shit. and as u can tell from morning editorial sleep habits are still very fucked. food was much easier to fix quick tho i still have to like, check the clock sometimes and be like did i eat anythimg recently ❓ but even if i forget ive been drinking lots of fluids bc i was severely dehydrated like Really was and even if i still am Dehydrated kts like. water helps fucking wverything dude. as long as i get some thats all i can do. but Yeah tangented as shit fuck but that was just a worry that was Completely understandable re what caused it just like at the time seemed unrelated. but my point is that now that im (in)sane again its not like... like im fine at work again nd stuff but im. def having more time problems still tho not as like idk scary as that felt. still concerning. have therapy today (i was Sposed to wake up when it happen and get like normal sleep time but you saw. you adamanda) so ill bring up, i like unloaded everything directly pre and post 2fdck Get and Ingested. Lot (good thing it was 2f bc! if it was regular ket! well i mightve had an actual medical 'emerjencie' on my hands from all that nutrience) just so like. like i texted her beforehand like hey we wont get to address like any of this bc i have so much totell you but like thurs itll be fine just like heds up. nd as i expected things r like. yeah nothing Major major happened between monday anf now. life normal. Vector version of normal. so like What te fuck is going on but like its fine like take a hit off ybis its fine.

[justdyingslowly]

1. Name justdyingslowly obviously come on

2. Nationality Australian

3. Age 22

4. Birthday nnnah dont feel like it

5. Zodiac sign (or your primal zodiac sign) Libra/Scorpio cusp

6. Gender wamon

7. Sexuality very very hetero

8. Your looks (add a picture or describe yourself) androgenous

9. What do you/did you study? Psychology (focus on sexology) and art.

10. What’s your current job like?/What job would you like to have? I am disabled you think I can work ha sexologist would be awesome. When I was a kid I wanted to be a fireman but Australias always burning

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11. Your birth order head first

12. How many siblings do you have? 1

13. Do you have good relations with your family? yeah dads finally out of his abusive relationship, nearing age 70 and his emotions and his sexuality are finally opening up for the first time and that makes me SO happy.

14. How many friends do you have? what kind of fucked up question is this.

15. Your relationship status relationshipped. Fiance? got the marriage papers in a drawer somewhere with the car rego but can’t be fucked filling them?

16. What do you look for in a SO? empathetic, mature, calm. Always open to discussion. Prefers to be blunt rather than secretive. Emotional age over 14 (incredibly fucking rare apparently). Puts an importance on context and understanding other views above all else.

17. Do you have a crush? Hellll yeah Crush on my partner and got a crush on a mutual friend of ours who don’t even know hes cute af hehe one day partners gonna accidentally spill the beans and embarrass me coz hes shit with secrets RIP me.

18. When did you have your first kiss? You think I can remember this bullshit? Its not that big a deal

19. Do you prefer serious and meaningful relationships or casual dating/one night stands? One night stand sex almost exclusively sucks. Just. SUCKS. Because neither of you know what the other likes and it ends up being an awkward mix of trying to please yourself while trying to also be considerate.

20. What are your deal breakers? Plugging your ears to anything that feels gross, uncomfortable or disagrees with you. How can you grow as a person without introspection? How can you mold what you think and believe without taking in other arguments and comparing them to your beliefs to see how they stack up? Its pathetic.

-

21. How was your day? cute mutual friend had a fall this morning and were both worried about him. His back is bad and he’s getting a little older, he can’t be getting dizzy and having falls like that. other than that im anxious about seeing my gastro. He’s lovely but... specialists are specialists. Good at knowing what they know but not always great at listening.

22. Favourite food & drink you think im allowed to eat or drink? water and... foods a touchy subject.

23. What position do you sleep in? Usually on my side with a body pillow to grip so I don’t end up choking my partner in his sleep.

24. What was your last dream about? uuhhh...going to italy and being unable to get into this tiny basket boat properly.

25. Your fears does PTSD to medical shit count haha

26. Your dreams ... going to italy and being unable to get into a tiny basket boat thingy?

27. Your goals - get some sort of diagnosis eventually. Its been 3 years of trying and im tired. - get back to studying art part time for my bachelors. - pass JLPT N3. - go back to university for psychology. - do the dishes when I get home.

28. Any pets? two budgies. we also take care of any orphaned or injured birds.

29. What are your hobbies? feeling nauseous drawing writing a little bit im making a little gameboy game in C atm too

30. Any cool places in your area? i live next to a national park with waterfalls and koalas and emus and stuff

31. What was your last awkward situation? mutual friend made a comment on his chest i playfully smacked it (related to the comment) it was surprisingly hard “O-oh wow, thats... I didnt expect that” my partner laughed at me. it was awful.

32. What is your last regret? getting embarrassed at friends pecs stop making me think about it 33. Language/s you can speak english. N4 Japanese.

34. Do you believe in astrological stuff? (Zodiac, tarot, etc.) of course not what the fuck

35. Have any quirks? Quirkless. I do wiggle when im happy though apparently.

36. Your pet peeves open doors.

37. Ideal vacation spend a months chilling in an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

38. Any scars? internal? yes

39. What does your last text message say? peepee poopoo ustinky

40. Last 5 things from your search history how do i find this

41. What’s your [device] background? Sam Porter Bridges walkin around Sam Porter Bridges cuddling BB-28 Louise while he sleeps my chicken

42. What do you daydream about? all might

43. Describe your dream home an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

44. What’s your religion/Your thought about religion its a comforting thought having a parent-figure who cares about you and looks after all the big things you can’t manage yourself, but institutionalizing it runs a severe risk of becoming harmful cults. And it often does.

45. Your personality type me

46. The most dangerous thing you’ve done i saw the lost bunny that was on all the posters in the neighbourhood looked thin and patchy so i grabbed him to take him home. im allergic. sent me to hospital and I almost died.

47. Are you happy with your current life? feeling sick sucks and partners having a depressive episode but things are pretty good

48. Some things you’ve tried in your life living

-

49. What does your wardrobe consist of? blacks, reds, whites and pinks

50. Favourite colour to wear? at the moment pink. Red is always comforting though.

51. How would you describe your style? mix between lazy alternative punk, teenager with band shirts and harajuku peach kawaii uwu

52. Are you happy with your current looks? kinda wish i was a bit shorter but what can you do

53. If you could change/add something to your appearance - impossible or not - what would it be? bit shorter

54. Any tattoos or piercings? lol no PTSD

55. Do you get complimented often? by who? partner constantly, family haha are you kidding im australian so a friend’s version of showing affection is calling you a cunt and slapping your ass in public

56. Favourite aesthetic? all might

57. A popular trend that you dislike blocking because you disagree or find them distasteful. Ignoring all context to opposing thoughts and arguments. taking a personal feeling of disgust to mean something is evil. Blocking your ears to anything that isn’t a circlejerk of what you already think - and trying to isolate anyone who even just listens to something other then the noise of your sloppy dicks to have a thought of their own.

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58. Songs you’re currently obsessed with? The Machine by Low Roar

59. Song you normally wouldn’t admit you like. why wouldnt i admit i like a song

60. Favourite genre? probably enka haha

61. Favourite artist/band/genre? probably enka haha oh and tatsuro yamashita

62. Hated popular songs/artists? why the hell would I hate something like a song? I hate aspects of the music industry as a whole I guess?

63. Put your music on shuffle and list first 5 which playlist they aren’t all together in one place

64. Can you sing or play any instruments? piano, saxophone... uh... partners good at making music and playing shakuhachi

65. Do you like karaoke? no.

66. Own any albums? yes? many?

67. Do you listen to radio? What stations? no. but triple J, ABC Jazz and Classical. sometimes they even play final fantasy and JRPG music on classical which is pretty neat. -

68. Favourite movie/series? can i make this about games because then the answer is Metal Gear Solid

69. Favourite genre of movies/books/etc ...shounen?

70. Your fictional crush/es if they’re over 40yrs old, male and happy and bubbily or grumpy and sad then there’s a big ol fat chance I wanna bone. Solid Snake from MGS4, All Might and pretty much anyone drawn by Tarou Madoromi.

71. Which fictional character is you? uh

72. Are you a shipper? List your otps, if so what does this even mean what language is this

73. Favourite greek god? idk hades seems chill

74. A legend from where you live that you like the story of Tjilbruke is funny and good. all Kaurna stories are good.

75. Do you like art? What’s your favourite work or artist? im in a big egon schiele mood atm.

76. Can you share your other social media? no i am incapable

77. Favourite youtubers? many

78. Favourite platform? not too high up. actually i like being a little lower than ground level in corners.

79. How much time do you spend on the internet? too much

80. What video games have you played? Which one’s your favourite? look i just want to say that MGS4 is the best one in the series and Death Stranding is phenomenally engaging.

81. Your favourite books (manga also counts) these are all so goddamn definitive how can I pick? Oh wait the answer is One Piece

82. Do you play board/card games? I play DnD atm and know 15 yr old rules to Yugioh

83. Have you ever been to a night marathon in cinema? that shit dosn’t happen here

84. Favourite holiday golden week coz its a week also easter because thats when all the glucose based sweets come back

85. Are you into dramas? what kind

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86. Would you use death note, if you had one? no. thats called being a murderer.

87. What changes would you make in the world, no matter how impossible, if you had the power to? chill people out a bit. when people feel unsafe they get really depenfive and territorial and block their ears to everything, making in-and-out groups for themsevles that end up putting them in more harm.

88. Could you survive a zombie apocalypse? im disabled with a disabled partner. we arent funny sure we can survive normal everyday life when society is angled so sharply against us.

89. If you had to be turned into a paranormal being, what would it be? id like to be a mimi spirit

90. What would you want to happen to you after your death? spooky time

91. If you had to change your name, what would be your pick? toshinori yagi

92. Who would you switch your life with for a week? anyone healthy

93. Pick an emoji to be your tattoo that cursed one with the intense eyes and the hand

94. Write 3 things about yourself - only one of them must be true im me im not me im pee

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95. Cold or hot? cold.

96. Be a hero or be a villain? both are distasteful ideas in reality

97. Sing everything you want to say or rhyme? i can’t do either partner speak sin bad puns and its hell, these both sound about equal

98. Shapeshifting or controlling time? shapeshifting. controlling time is eithe rmanipulative or lonely. shapeshifing is every other superpower at once.

99. Be immortal or be immune to everything aside from natural death? both are deeply upsetting ideas

100. ….. or …..? jiji or ossan? generally Jiji, but ossans can be lovely too.

[shiro-0197]

aw shiro, my love, don't worry about it!! i only hope you're okay and safe :d please only reply when you're free, and don't feel bad about it!! >:(

my day yesterday was okay, i've just been relaxing, and studying occasionally. went out to explore a nearby town too, it's so pretty there. and much colder (since it's a highlands) of course!! Today was great too. I bought doughnuts (they're amazing?? I love doughnuts), and I had instant ramen, but it was SO spicy I nearly died. (Three bottles of water later, because someone finished all the milk in the household *cough* me *cough*) and I'm still just reeling. Sucks having such low spice tolerance HAHA. I'm listening to some old school hip-hop rn, while typing this out :D how were your two days?

here are some i'll be using to teach english :d and that would honestly be much appreciated, he's getting on my last nerve rn. (I included the first few, what do you think?)

thats such a priceless feeling i so totally agree. you're so precious 🥺🥺 i'm sure they're prouder thank you imagine. you're so dedicated!! i'm sure all that extra research you've done will definitely pay off. it's good that you know what the job is roughly like, so you'll be really prepared when you finally do start it. you know that one scene, in the 2nd season of the great pretender? when the chinese mafia boss emphasizes the importance of a translator in literally everything? (like that book award example) i may be getting the thing muddled up, but i found that so cool. like yeah, a book or speech could be absolutely beautiful, but if everyone can't enjoy it due to it being a different language, it would be such a shame. i just find translators really important. sorry, i'm really dorky haha 🥺🥺

awww but i think your personality type is wonderful. a lot of my favourite characters are intj (they're all so precious istg grrrr) yes!! i was in a tooru brainrot yesterday too 😭😭😭 (saw a bunch of couples on my walk, and I was like "if only Tooru was real grrrr") and yes?? there'd be so much to learn from each and every one of them. dedication from hinata, savage lines from tsukki, kindness from yams/yachi, how to be a dork 101 from atsumu. aaaah 😭😭i'm sorry they're all so wonderful.

No pftttt I totally feel you. I saw some people without masks today and I was like "bro wtf" and just really loudly said "I sure hope everyone starts following the rules so the cases don't increase" because I'm a lil bitch like that xD

awww okay!! I'll definitely keep that in mind. Mayo makes everything better, tbh >.< aww that's understandable! I don't have specific preferences but hearing the phrase "soggy cheese" makes me want to cry somewhere :( I don't like nuts in chocolate. I'm very passionate about that? XD ikr??

I'm surprised too, I usually never pass on murder, but I guess you're just special like that 👉👈 sir I'd get married to you as many times as you'd like 😼 oops sorry for being cheesy, but—you like cheese ;)

U

I won't ask why, don't worry. Since I kinda feel the same about Malaysia tbh. It's a love hate relationship, I think HAHA but yeah 😣😣 i don't look up to US at all, and it sucks because people generally do. And I'm just like ;-; why (no offense to Americans tho lol)

is that even legal omg they're so chaotic?? XD how cute tho. Angel does stuff like that all the time too, but I'd never know that when I first met her (she has the most perfect exterior, and then when you get to know her; she's the biggest dork) Schools opening on the 20th, I can't wait to see her then :] (I can, however, wait for the exams which are scheduled for the 25th ugh)

peanut butter is indeed yellow, not up for discussion hehe :) here's my favourite hues!! I love gentle, soft hues like these (pastels) , for yellow; I don't have a favourite. they're all wonderful

ahhh no that's so precious of you!! :)) I'm smiling rn.

yeah skdhskdjsk I'M JUST SO GRRR. Whenever someone goes "hey Ari can you ______" and we both respond?? The tension?? In the air?? Bro skdjskks. 😔🤚 You share a name with one of the most precious characters too tho!!;

This is Shiro from Voltron hehe. I love him so much, just like I love you (tho I'm sure we both know I love you more <3)

I share a name with a book character. His name is Aristotle Mendoza, but his crush-turned-boyfriend calls him "Ari" (which has been my nickname since I was 12). Reading it for the first time was the BEST feeling ever. It's also my favourite book, "Aristotle and Dante discover the secrets of the universe".

—Ari :D (no pfttt I love the tag so much. I have my own tag, that's like the best thing ever 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺)

Heyyy I'm so sorry for answering so late!! I know you said not to apologize but..... well hmm no excuse I just feel like apologizing, but either way thank you for your patience!!♡ This is the third time I'm rewriting this, and this time I'm doing this in my notes because fuck it😔

Im glad to hear that!! Highlands are always so pretty. Wish we had those here, but it's only steppe here:( Boring~ ooh, donuts!!! They're really good. I havent much, but I tried them like 3 times and they're so good. I really hope I will get to eat more<3 also WHAT'S THOSE NOODLES' NAME I WANNA KNOW- Are you feeling okay now, though? XD

My days were nice!!! Felt as if I had been hiding three bodies, but I've been feeling better lately. We had online school yesterday so I'm excused from the errands for the half of the day, thankfully. But your messages make me very happy. Though I dont always feel like writing a response (or I get stressed because it doenst save) so very sorry for that😔

Ohh those look so pretty!! I'd totally join to just look at them. The colors are so nice🥺 it looks like one of our olympiad prep slides, though better. I dont have the screenshots sadly😩 Either way I really love the little details like the squiggly thingies or the Ж .... they seem unnecessary but the energy changes a lot without them hehe

I really hope they will be🥺 that'd mean a lot to me. And I'm also really hopeful itll work out. I really don't wanna disappoint my family, which is literally just one person. The less people there are, the more it hurts, you know?

Yeah, that scene meant so much to me!! I dknt remember much, but I was very happy they said something like that, because I've been told being a translator wont work out for me. Now look at me, I'm about to tell them to fuck themselves<3 I was also so surprised to see Laurent know that many languages ..... I aspire to be like him😩 And honestly, I havent though so deep of that but you opened my eyes and now I'm about to float off into the next universe😭 dont apologize though, its very cute!!!♥︎♥︎

Heheh, I guess you're right.. every single anime INTJ is a silent sexy mastermind and I love them . ... YEAH every single time I see a passing couple i cry because I dont have anyone 😡💔 and sometimes when I see people doing something amusing (which includes people failing cuz I'm evil) I just imagine one of the characters doing that and I smile all the way xD Honestly, I'd sell my father on black market for a single day with one of them:( though that may sound like a really low price because his cigarette filled lungs wouldnt cost a lot... I sound like my 7th grade self again I'm so sorry

BAHQHHANEJWJD I HOPE THEY WERE EMBARRASED. I HOPE THEY FELT AWKWARD AND OTHER PEOPLE DID TOO, they deserve it. Like, learn your lesson bitch, it's been a year!

Yeah!!! I love mayo, not to the point where I would gulp it down from the package, but it does make dishes taste good. Same, soggy cheese on itself sounds like a dish served in the ninth circle of hell. You should try nuts in honey!! Like, just straight up dip them in honey. Sounds weird, and it doesnt always taste NEJFJKSKF (depends on the honey)but I think it's worth trying xD Walnuts are the best with honey I think

That was so funny ... TOO FUNNY, I LAUGHED FOR LIKE . 3MINUTES STRAIGHT and I do not laugh when I'm tired. You really are special 😭😭😭😭 cheesy ... HAHRNFJJSF

I'm so sorry for being a bully like that but it's so funny how you left a single U there . Its so mysterious, was it in purpose? Or were you lost in the excitement if messaging me?

I was one of those people, honestly 😭 but mostly because I wasnt aware of its political condition, I guess. Maybe theres more than just politics that's bad about US, but honestly, it has more opportunities than this hellfire. Though now I'm more into Norway and Japan. Really wanna travel there :(

Heheh, yeah, we never really show off to strangers at first. I dont know what exactly I mean by we, but you get my point ♡ Good luck though!! I hope it goes well for you<3

Oh they looks so pretty!! They're really wonderful. Like bubblegum and cotton candy and literally anything sweet... it's so cute !!! And I totally agree, there isnt a bad yellow.

HAHAH, honestly, that reminds me of how there were 4 people with the same name in my class, and whenever the teacher did the attendance thing, they would all stand up. Teachers usually dont say the last names, so we always gotta ask which person they mean if theres more than one person with that name, so yeah.. That happened on accident at first, but then they just did it for trolling xD

OH MY GOD HES SO PRETTY? HES SO PRECIOUS?? HUHHH??? I gotta thank Kuro for this wonderful opportunity of sharing a name with someone like .... him🥺

Oh that's so cool!! Also, he has a boyfriend ... I really need to start reading xD it's so cute though! It sounds like such a good book, I'm glad you share a name with him, hehe!!

I also share my real name with one of the characters in a kids' show, and its SO ugly, I'm in pain. Every time my friends see one of those on TV they go

Which is a pain in the ass, it's so embarrassing...........

Awh, okay!! I'm glad you love it, cuz I do too. Because it's your name.... cuz I love u. That was so lame PLEASEJWJDJSJF I HOPE YOUR DAY WAS GREAT !!! LOVE YOU

[medigocrazy-blog]

Dexamethasone- The Wonder Drug or The Desperate Hope?

Despite all the desperate efforts to control the spread of the virus SARS-CoV2, wiz getting on nerves of us, humans, as a very, very, social ;sometimes; toxic, species 

Hello,          I am Arjun and this picture is not me. Its been like 6 months into this pandemic and I have been eating all this junk you can actually say that this picture is me.Gosh, I was so excited for 2020 because so many exciting things were about to happen. Elon Musk was actually going to complete that Neuralink trial thingy by the end of this year and I could finally end my never ending struggle to take care of my> oh my god> numerous organ systems? my weight ? and my metabolism? any my eyesight? and my everything? Who the h*ll does that? 

But no, its just not happening guys. I am pretty sure now because 2020 is just the worst year! let us just agree to that as a starter!

Can you guys like believe that we cannot go out for window shopping anymore?

I go out to buy milk and I have to wear this Halo master chief armored suit thingy.

Ordering from Starbucks is just a pandemic and one kidney away and I certainly cannot beat the Indian summer heat.

I am desperate, I am so desperate that Baba Ramdev doing Yoga at 4:30 in the morning actually makes sense somehow.

I am so desperate that my lockdown 3 AM anthem is :

Taoism talks about how you should go with the flow so thats what I am actually doing, I am finally going with the flow,

But it feels like this flow is actually going towards a falling waterfall and we all are almost on the edge now.

The International airlines are shut down You cannot travel to Ladakh or Goa with your friends and Emiway just featured Macklemore in his song? Like seriously? He went from worshiping M&M to MM? Half a million people have died due to the Coronavirus alone

Yemen is going through a civil war and one of the worst famines in modern history.

And for some reason Delhi is getting its ego drop by a series of Earthquakes.

Well,  Thank You 2020, UNESCO just declared you to be the most confused year in the history of mankind. Like seriously, please decide what you want man.

Now, lets talk medicine.

Lets talk about the scope Dexamethasone potentially has, against Covid-19,

There has been numerous claims in the recent past to have successfully found a potential cure for Covid-19, But I was like meh; BUT I am pretty excited for this one which Oxford just released a statement for I think last night maybe.

The World Health Organisation also applauded the initial results of the study.

It is really interesting, the excerpt said that they are trying to publish the data as soon as possible which basically makes it a more trustworthy of a claim.

The study was an attempt to potentially use Dexamethosone  (A long acting corticosteroid which can remain in the systemic circulation for as long as 3 days) as a DOC for the Covid19.

What are Steroids?

Steroids is a group of chemical compounds with extensive properties often used as a drug of choice for many life threatening diseases.

Some steroids ( Androgenic Steroids) are activated due to stress and leads to many anabolic processes inside your body for example "Muscle building", When you are like trying to get those gains so badly in the gym, what basically happens is you are stressing your muscular cells (also injuring) as a result of resistance training and then steroids are produced as a physiological response so that more and more protein is available for the muscle to repair (btw this is the reason why some bodybuilders using anabolic steroids, end up gaining exceptional gains over years of steroid use)

Some steroids (Glucocorticoids) can strongly suppress the immune system by either suppressing certain genes in various immune cells or by blocking the important enzyme activities. These steroids can act as Anti Inflammatory too which basically means these steroids counter any inflammatory response which can be physiological or pathological. This is the reason that if a steroid taken in the early phase of the Covid-19 disease (The mild symptomatic or Asymptomatic phase) can actually suppress the immunity to a certain point that the drug itself becomes counterproductive.

Some Steroids (Mineralocorticoids) maintain the mineral balance by salt retention, etc. Lets just skip this one.

Adrenal Gland produces Steroid. Them tiny glands you can see above the kidneys.

Now the immunity suppressing nature of Dexamethasone is also the reason why it cannot be taken as a mass prophylaxis drug,  unless the patient is in a state of severe immune response to the infection and requires ventilation or ICU.

The exudate formed in the lungs become an overwhelming immune response to fighting the virus and becomes fatal by causing the patient to stay in respiratory distress and finally succumbing to death.

The Trials done by the Oxford University aka RECOVERY trials, said that :

"1 death would be prevented by treatment of around 8 ventilated patients"

or

"around 25 patients requiring oxygen alone as of now"

*The prognosis may potentially increase as with other combinations in the future*

The study is really interesting because the study population was relatively large ( around 11,500) ; The Cohort population was around 2100 and Control was 4300 which is really exciting.

How does Dexamethasone work against SARS - CoV2?

Dexamethasone is a long acting Corticosteroid and mostly suppress the genes of immune expression

This is the Mechanism of Action of the drug if you are interested:  

Dexamethosone vs The Immune System :  

The goal of this drug is to just deactivate the immune system which has gone kinda crazy over this virus.

The immune system (IS) basically starts acting like its IS and terrorizes the whole body like its Iraq or Syria.

Jokes aside, This drug can really do some great damage to the hyper super- immune response which is kind of self destructive as the disease progress. Let's try to understand HOW

Only Within 6 hours of single dose of Dexamethasone:

There is a decreased availabilty of lymphocytes, eosinophils, basophils, monocytes,

These cells start redistributing and becomes less available and inactive for almost a day or two.

Also there is a decreased adhesion of these cells to blood vessel walls due to Dexamethasone, Actually the drug is not letting these immune cells to cross the wall of the vessel and go to the infection site (which is kinda cool cuz' no immune response no problem right? seriously why didnt evolution think of this?)

SECONDLY < there is a > decreased phagocytotic capacity of the immune cells so that they do not eat up the virus and form further exudates.

Finally leading to the decrease in respiratory burst (It is the area inside a phagocyte where we burn the pathogen inside the phagolysosome usually, in the case of Covid19,  later explodes and kills us, Dont worry the jokes' on evolution not us )

Now the first most remarkable thing Dexamethasone does is, that, it suppresses Macrophage activity.

Which is basically blocking the Arachidonic Acid Pathway, Prostaglandins, Leukotrienes, Interleukin 1, Interleukin 6 and TNF

Explaination :

IL-1 goes to the brain and causes fever and normally increases the production of steroids by stimulating the hypothalamus, but since we are giving Dexamethasone (which is a steroid) there's something called as a negative feedback and it decreases the natural physiological production of steroid, causing the person to be severely dependent on steroids; and if the person stops taking this steroid, he can eventually die due to acute adrenal insufficiency, thats the reason why we should always taper the dose when withdrawing a steroid.

Now,

The Interleukin 6 usually activates almost all other immune system actions (Remember that respiratory burst is also decreased and hence theres no signal from the MHC I and II to activate the immune system either)  but when it is suppressed by Dexamethoasone, it cannot activate the immune response like it normally would.

The second most important thing is that Dexamethasone down stimulates the cooperation between naive T cells and Interleukins

In Covid 19, Macrophage connects with the Naive T cells and there is a co-stimulation and can be two pathways. (depending on which interleukin is available for the naive T cell)

The first pathway:

In presence of Interleukin 4, these Naive T cells convert into T helper -1 cells which further increases Interleukin 4 and Interleukin 5 by positive feedback mechanism.

Finally causing the other cells of cell- mediated immunity, the "B-cells" to become active and produce antibodies which bind with the virus antigen and try to repeatedly neutralise it. (and kills us).

The Dexamethasone can potentially end all this suffering by attacking a gene known as GATA3 on the T helper 1 cell, (Remember Steroids suppress some immune genes it is just one of them) and hence GATA3 is suppressed, and therefore the chain is broken and there is no immune response ( yay, we alive now)

The second pathway :

If the naive t cell has Interleukin 12 available instead of Interleukin 4, it becomes T helper 2 cell, which produces Interleukin 2, which activates Cytotoxic T cells which produces some naughty proteins called perforins and granzymes.

These Perforin causes perforations in the infected cell and granzymes are then injected to that infected cell which makes the cell kind of commit suicide I guess ?. (and it kills us)

Dexamethasone acts on the T-bet gene on the T helper 2 cell which suppresses the further activation of immune response ( and hey we back to life again)

Now, ALL this information which just went over all of our heads is just the immune suppression of steroids, Lets not go in details with the EXTENSIVE collection of what Dexamethasone can actually achieve.

Please note the trials were done with Dexamethasone and not other corticosteroids mainly because of its wide availability, inexpensive nature, and most importantly because it is along acting Corticosteroid despite being the most potent among them

Dexamethasone also decreases inflammation

Explaination :

Our Cell membranes have a phospholipid bilayer, which is converted by PLA2( Phospholipase A2 ) enzyme to Arachidonic Acid. a) Arachidonic Acid is acted on By COXs ( Cyclooxygenases) to release PGE2F2, PGI2, Thromboxin A2 b) Arachidonic acid can be converted to Leukotrienes by LOXs (Lipooxygenase)

Dexamethasone can block the PLA2 enzyme and COX2 and COX1,  by producing Lipocortin 1, and therefore there's no formation of Arachidonic Acid in the first place, and the whole inflammatory system goes down. (Kudos to the structure of Dexamethasone)

Please, keep in mind that we do need the immune and inflammatory response in the early part of the disease but as their  actions overwhelm the healthy effects of the process, steroids can be used. Not too early, because it can actually worsen the disease if steroids are administered too early.

Some Side Effects which are to be kept in mind :

1. Withdrawl :

- Underlying disease which we were treating may rebound even stronger than before - Acute Adrenal Insufficiency - Pseudotumor Cerebri - Myalgias - Arthralgias - Malaise

2. Hyper use of steroid for long period :

- Fluid and electrolyte abnormalities - HTN ( more sodium retention) - Hyperglycemia ( gluconeogenesis) - Increased infection susceptibility (suppressed immune system) - Behavioral disturbances - Striae (fat redistribution)

While this is a serious concern for us as Indians, people are already stocking up Dexamethasone, price is most likely to spike up and things actually somehow do not work perfectly in India. Let's hope we learn from our mistakes in the past and just get this done and over with. PS - I will try to post more articles like this if I find something interesting regarding the pandemic. Thank you for the time. :)   Feel free to contact.

Source: Dexamethasone statement by WHO

https://www.who.int/news-room/detail/16-06-2020-who-welcomes-preliminary-results-about-dexamethasone-use-in-treating-critically-ill-covid-19-patients

Oxford Recovery Trial Statement

https://www.recoverytrial.net/files/recovery_dexamethasone_statement_160620_v2final.pdf

[juliankinney]

━━ ( alex fitzalan + cis male + twenty-two ) oi , have you seen julian kinney around ? he lives in flat 14 in bedroom 4 ? i was meant to meet them this morning at bean me up before our lecture but he didn’t show . no ? well , shit . if you do see them , can you tell them i’m looking for them ? they’re a 4th year computer science student from madrid , spain & you’ll know it’s them because they might just remind you of a stack of unread books , the sound of keyboard typing at three in the morning , coffee creamer in every flavor , & unprescribed pills if that helps at all . just be careful , he can be a little distant , critical , & compulsive sometimes . —- oh don’t look like that , they’re usually ingenious , reliable , & confident most of the time . ✏ y! , 22 , she/her , cst

alright whats up guys, as jd once said, greetings and salutations!! im y and this here is julian, who i’ve known for two hours but adore already anyway. i usually play dumbass boys and he’s no exception, but i like to think he might just be a little less dumb than the rest of them. so lets jump into it!!! ♡

for starters here is his messy pinterest board that i made.. like i said... it is a mess, and still a work in progress but y’all can have it anyway!! (fun fact: was gonna make him texan but pepper called him country boy and i was triggered!!!!!!!!!!)

backstory:

 julian was the conception of two teenagers in love during the 90′s in spain; a local and a tourist. the pair were just seventeen when they became parents but it was a whole ordeal at the time because his father’s side of the family did not want anything to do with this impregnated nobody. it wasn’t his grandfather’s vision!!! his son was supposed to go into adulthood unscathed by his mistakes!!! as you can guess julian’s mom side of the family were your blue-collared society while his father’s side was more white-collared. at the time his mother was a student and helped her own mom with the family tailor shop while her father worked as a cook in a restaurant. on the other end of the spectrum, the kinney’s were in the film industry and of old money. needless to say, the two families had little in common.

the kinney’s tried to pay this girl off but her family was 100% not having it and after many arguments and empty threats they came to an agreement. said agreement was that julian would have his rightful surname and would stay in spain and the family would receive a weekly stipend for his expenses. in return no one would say a thing to the press— which, honestly was only ever a threat because the kinney’s wanted to pretend like nothing had happened. 

and so julian grew up in madrid with a single mother and the help of his grandparents. as far as he knew his father had died shortly after he had been born and had been madly in love with his mother (that part was true). the only reason he didn’t share a name with the rest of his family was because the pair had never married, which, would have been the truth regardless. everything was fine; he grew up working at the family shop, attended school, skipped school, maintained amazing grades while simultaneously spending 1/3rd of the time in detention, lost his virginity to marisol cordova in her lilac colored room, etc. he had the most basic upbringing a kid could have.

then his father died. his real father. and suddenly, on paper, he was well off. it wasn’t easy for his mother to tell him the truth when his grandfather stepped foot into the one story home like he had seventeen years ago with that sour look on his face, but she was forced to. she had no other choice. devastated as she was (and she was truly heartbroken), she told him the story of how one day during the summer of 96′ she met james kinney, and how the next year he came back. then, his grandfather informed him of his father’s will and how he’d have access to his inheritance once he turned eighteen.

it was... a lot to process, and as julian does when he feels overwhelmed, he got angry. he was very upset with his mother and even more so with this old man he was meeting for the first time who kept calling him shit like ‘his only grandson’ and ‘a kinney by blood’. it was infuriating for julian, and his mother further telling him about their weekly allowance among other expenses over the years did not help. at all.

that is how julian found out his father was a successful actor turned director, generally known for an action packed franchise released in the 2000′s. it was mind boggling— he’d turn on the tv only to see a picture of his now dead father on screen, news coverage of the deadly car accident that occurred during en route to manchester on every channel. it just didn’t make any sense and was very hard to feel sad for. besides, his mother had enough sadness for the both of them. at his funeral, the two had to stay in the back while the family tried to come up with a game plan of how things were going to move forward; james’ widow was not happy to see her husbands former lover and child at the scene. 

anyways in spite the fact that julian wanted nothing to do with the kinney’s, his grandfather had other plans. a vision of his own for the only grandchild his son had brought into the world, and that started with schooling. julian graduated and had no plans for college until his grandfather threatened to contest the will if he chose to stray from the path, and they needed the money; so college it was. a college of his grandfather’s choice of course, and what better place than somewhere closed off enough to distance julian from the outer world but elite in its own right? 

his grandfather’s plan basically is to make him successful, and being that julian has no interest in their world, he’s had to compromise and just live with the fact that julian is just going to be your regular everyday man. he’s only really doing all of this because he feels guilt over the years but not guilty enough to tell the world that there’s an extra kinney lying around (last names are so common right!?!??!) . however, he still wants him to be in the family. as in everyone in the direct family knows of him and he gets to be involved in all family affairs, etc, but julian just does not give a fuck about them fksdhjfs specially because of how they fucked over his mom and how james’ widow is so fucking bitter about the will.

ANYWAYS he’s been at the school for four years now, gets his schooling paid by his grandfather but still has a job because pride or whatever, and will hack into your shit!

personality/hc’s

i love him, he’s sweet but also not annoyingly sweet. as in yeah he’s nice and polite but has no problem squaring up due to his short temper. kind of blunt sometimes though, and either is dumb or acts dumb if he says something that might hurt someones feelings. like oh.. sorry you feel that way ksjfsdkln

super smart???? has amazing grades and constantly does his work; knows how to multitask and balance his life out (for the most part... at least until he burns himself out). an intellectual™ . not an eboy but i guess u could say a little bit of a gamer,, has tik tok downloaded on his phone, the dad friend i guess

is either in one end of the spectrum or the other when it comes to socializing. most of the time though he finds it exhausting,, talking is hard but once he does start talking it’s like shut up dude no one cares about javascript 

has a small pill problem,, he’s got to be successful somehow right !! also drinks lots of coffee and is a fan of coffee creamer, does not like the strawberry shortcake creamer though because ew. only tea he will drink is matcha green tea, anything else can suck it. 

has also developed some ~anxious~ feelings , why ? idk, light trauma i guess. his pill usage sure doesn’t help though! loser! ... tbh maybe his anxiousness has grown over the years because he doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do after school like he has money (that he tries not to use if i’m being honest, would rather use the money he gains from his job which i haven’t decided what should be. leave me alone), and will have a degree, but he’s still just questioning everything?? things have just been weird

sometime during middle school years (idk whats the equivalent of this in spain, shut up) he got into computers and... i’m not proud of this but his first hack was into this girls account that he liked and bro all he wanted to do was see some titties man thats it i promise. that crush did not work out, obvs.

anyways yes he continued down this computer path and made an app during high school!!! it wasn’t successful at all and he eventually deleted it but good for him coding and shit!!! 

would hack into school systems to help out his buds and their grades. yeah they could have just copied off of him but... where is the fun in that lads 

sometime he be just looking up ‘james kinney interviews’ on youtube just to see who this dude was dshjkg poor lad

can speak english and spanish ,, has that lisp thingy spaniards have i hate it but i guess whatever 

kind of messy honestly, can someone clean his desk 

connections

literally anything just hmu i can’t come up with these things tbh

[pandofndm]

Nemesis, Holons’ designs and the Chase family

So, I think it’s now a pretty popular speculation that the Chase family (minus Julian) might be involved with the Union. Julian’s mom didn’t seems that shoocked about the attack, kind of surprise, but not so much. And She took charge pretty quickly. We don’t know what is her current work but the different pictures we can see in the background show her and her husband being cop (or military ?), so she knows how to keep it cool and act.

Thinking right away that she’s from the Union solely based on the fact she’s not that surprised is kind of weak. BUT. Then comes episode 2 with what’s Sinclair say : “I know someone who'd very much like to say hello to you.”

Assuming he’s talking about a character we know, and we can be pretty sure it is... there is not a ton of person he could refer to. Mom, Drianna, or maybe the dead (?) dad but I don’t buy that one with the informations we have so far.

Then, episode 4 happened. Tl;dr Drianna is Nemesis or at least one of the pilot/mind controling Nemesis, and a traumatized child just traumatized another child and eveything is NOT FINE. Long post under the cut.

We don’t really know if Nemesis is a Holon or work the same way. But assuming Nemesis is a Holon, with episode 4 we know that the pilot must be young (something younger that 30 I guess. julian is 25 or 26 i think, Leon seems to be 30 or early 30′s) Thats the first thing. Oh also I’ll refer to Nemesis as a sort of entity with a “it”, because we don’t know who controle it, if there is more than one person, we don’t even know if it IS a person for sure.

Second thing : something is REALLY wrong about this mech. It act super weirdly. Its way of moving ? Very unatural. Sometimes it seems to... struggle. I thought it was just the head movement, but I saw something else when Nemesis is attacking Julian. (21:16)

First Nemesis has the upper hand on Julian. Julian hold one of the right hand, the left is pretty tight, pulling him against the ground. But if you watch again, you can catch a sort of... struggle, visible on the left hand

Nemesis has NO reason at this moment to remove its hand. Its head shake, its hands shake. Creepy and weird. Julian didn’t talk so I’m not sure if Dri, if it’s her, could guss it’s her brother.

Then, the most unsettled thing of the whole scene. All the “help me”. It’s hard to hear at first. But there is several instance when we can hear something. The person who pilot this thing try to communicate.

The first “help me” is at 20:25. Very robotic. 20:33, more quiet. 21:16, awefully human, this time. I swear I’m hearing a girl’s voice. 21:18, very robotic and low pitch, just when Nemesis seems to hold back. 21:26, again, high pitch, a bit less robotic. Seems to me like a “break me” than a “help me” but it’s so hard to hear... And again Nemesis seems to hold back again. 22:23 I hear something but I don’t know if it’s a sound effect or again someone’s talking. Can sounds like a “Help”.

And last thing before the design analysis : Nemesis is knocked out for a second, Miranda come and talk, Nemesis react to it, seems hesitant or susprise and decide to leave. It’s not just because it decide it can’t beat the heroes. The way it’s done, we’re supposed to understand there is an implcation there. It has a purpose. The person who’s piloting Nemesis knows Miranda’s voice. Again, it’s assuming this person is a character we already know. Maybe it’s a new character. But anyway...

Now I’m gonna talk design wise, using the heroes as example. It may be far fetched, I won’t lie. But it’s interesting.

Chase. Not a lot to talk about. He kinda has the “default” mech. The biggest characterization is his wings, because he was a pilot. Also the Teal blue is his color, white secondary color.

Val/entina. They’s the sniper and the stealth one. Their outif is a cloak, a hood and heels. Their mech has the same elements. The mech even have something to match the dreads. And their color is different shades of purple, with black and grey as secondary colors. I added the simple mech but I don’t have a lot to say about it.

Kazu. He’s the tough one. Cammie comment something like “do you really need to look tougher ?”. He’s the big guy, so his mech is big. Even the simple version is already a bit bulkier than the rest, and has a beginning of “samurai like” features. Also, color red and black.

Yaz. Hers is really interesting. I read several time that the whole design of her mech is based on a mythical bird creature and well, she named her Holon Huma, and the creature is named Huma. ...So yeah. That’s why all about her is so bird like. Her short hair ? Sorry but it kinda look like feathers to me ! The pendant ? Huma. The basic mech ? Has some head shapes reminding feathers. The final mech ? Oh boi it IS feather on its head baby. Also I noticed she has baby heels that’s cute. I read Huma is also associated with phoenixes so it might be the reason of all the golden color but I’m not sure and frankly I’m not enough informed about this to talk about it and I don’t want to offense anyone. Black is her secondary color, sort of.

Finally Cammie. She’s the furry one, a little bunny. She has short legs, her suit has ears-like tech, previously she had a sort of ribbon bunny ears shaped, her sleeves give her arms the same shape of her mech and it remind me the shape we usually use on cartoonish character or some type of anthro chara as well. The first thing she put on her basic mech is... the ears. Also green everywhere, and white as a secondary color.

What about Nemesis ? Well...

I think the pictures talk for themselves. The design of Dri’s avatar is strangely really close to the design effect of the nanobots. All her design is based on shards. Pointy diamond-thingy in the hair, on her dress, on her shoes, as her earring. And Nemesis ? Pointy everywhere. Nemesis’s black color is kind of purple tainted but it may be because of the lighting here. Also black is the color of the Union with red light because they are super eviiiil. Drianna’s color on her avatar are pink, blue and purple. IRL it’s more pink. But hen again it’s a badguy robot so it must look EVIIIL and Dri play with contrast, really dark with really bright and shiny.

Nemesis has heels and, I might say fck to gender cliché usually, but it’s a hell of a coincidence. Also the mech has some sort of tights, so does Dri even is it’s really different. Nemesis doesn’t have a general “””feminine””” shape, but some part are feminine coded. And Roosterteeth don’t queercode male villains.

The heroes are... well, the heroes, so they can make their mech look like them as they want. The person controling Nemesis though ? I doubt they can do whatever they want. It’s not their mech, it’s the Union’s mech. But design-wise and character wise, Nemesis design is probably a bit tied to the person(s) piloting it. It’s a show, designs have purposes.

Also to the question “How the hell Drianna can almost beat 3 full trained soldiers ?” I reply she had four years to train, she may be not alone in the mech, the mech seems kind of... more advanced ? and she has 4 arms, it helps a bit let’s be honest.

I’ll end this by adding that I’m pretty sure whoever pilot that thing ? It has nasty effect on them. They seems to suffer. Maybe there are 2 pilots, because of the four arms and the way Nemesis hold back sometimes. Who knows ?

Oh and side note : Weller and Colonel Marin did not seems surprise a bit. They know someting. Something’s up. And it’s gonna be hella good folks !

Edit : QUICK EDIT BECAUSE I FORGOT SOMETHING Julian thinks his family is dead, Dri seemed suprise to see Julian in the Ether so maybe she doesn’t know he’s alive but her mom knows ? Or simple neither of them know and fake Sinclair was about to snitch. Anyway, Dri knows, Julian doesn’t, that’s SUSPICIOUS.

[bloodakoos]

holy fuck

 i think i just had  an inception dream. parenthesis means post dream thought

So, it starts by this guy (not me, this dream is in third person) that wants a bionicle collection (nice one) so he has to send a letter to LEGO (for some reason) but he doesnt have stamps, so he has to get some, he figures a “2 cent donation” would be a easy one to get. so he tries to get it but he learns that you gotta get 2 million of something i dont know i dont remember

somehow, they are at the lego company, building, or something i dont know and theres this guy that i dont know what it has to do with it but he shows us these “clams” (no wait those are actual giant clams and theyre alive) and they have this kind of system to do a somthi-something. After that they begin some kind of ‘session’ where everyone gets inside one. just as its going to begin, the clams are closing but Mr. Buissnessmann jumps out at the last moment. everyone sees him, so everyone leaves too, i dont know how but they get into a fight and protagonist over here wonders what actually happens inside a clam. so he gets inside one.

uhh end of chapter 1? i dont know. I am finally me, first person mode activated. i am in my room (its considerably different, (i think its the one from 4 years ago) so i go downstairs and theres dad in the store (he works there dont worry). and i go to the yard, i open the door and a cat salutes me. (its not any of the cats i have today, and i know it doesnt look like a real life cat, i cannot recall the color or pattern of the fur, but i know it was like a friend)  and its a good day, everybody is outside, the kids are playing so i go outside too, i open the garage door thingy i dont know how its called in english and i almost go before thinking “theyre gonna steal the car!” and the best idea was to just open the motor part thingy i dont know how thats called in english, so when people passed they were gonna think that the car is broken so they wont try to steal it. and i go, but think “the battery is still stealable, uhhh dont care just gona check each once in a while for people” so i finalle get to walk the corner and a see stuff. First the street was way wider (not boulevard wide just avenue wide) and ii see some kind of  pole going from side to side, its there supported on two scaffolds, and they explain it to me why is that there but i dont put attention into it so i dont remember. my mom is on the sidewalk, shes notably slimmer, and shes building a wooden chair for some reason. i go to check the car, no ones there. theres a bunch of people there now (was the first part leaking into this one?) so i go back to the yard, patio, whatever, and someones there. i try to scare them off, they see me, they run, but witH THE  BATTERY, i started following him, and he goes directly to the crowd, and i cant reach her. gdamn they stole the car battery that thing costs like 300 dollars alone

guess this is the end of chapter 2 because i dream transition into Wack Zone (wack zone is a city that exists in my dreams only. the reasoning for being called “wack zone” is because the streets are poorly laid out, reason of the buildings all having a strange but unique shape, i also have visited it before.) i am with this goverment man, hes like trying to get some measurements or something, and he tells me “how much do you think its from this pole to the corner of that building?” and i give a very specific cipher like i already knew the answer to that quesion, and i explain the reasoning behind it, i dont know how, but i say “much like a mini version of (???) in Japan” (i do not remember what was that word) and i visit the old man (the old man lives on one of the wackiest of buildings, very small and it has a super sharp angle, he lives on the low level, i already know the location since i have already visited Wack Zone in other dreams. so i check out the nearby buildings and theres this one with some kind of “z” formation and i want to see how it looks from the inside, so i try to see from the windows, but each one is covered with a sheet, and one is not fully covered so i see from there, i peek inside, i see the thing i go back. but i could help but think i was in danger while looking inside, the windows were covered for a reason. better run.

boom chapter 4 baby because dream transition and im suddenly on this plaza,i have been there before, i dont know if IRL but i have been there before and i know theres a dream version and a real life version. my mom is there. i hear a voice. its talking about dreams, ‘sweet dreams’ in that regard, and how you cant force sweet dreams. to quote this man (read this with gman voice) “The important part of sweet dreams in not on the inside, but on the outside.” The fuck is that supposed to mean? (The fuck is that supposed to mean?), so i walk the corner, hoping to find the lego store. my mom follows. There is no lego store. That is the real version of the plaza and not the dream version. I am confusion. i walk in the other direction and i see my mom. I woke up (because my mom called me phone irl)

[ma-serra]

I have never really had any new year resolution growing up. I always thought that new year resolution thingy is just bogus. Somehow this year, as i celebrate the coming of 2020. I had this funny thoughts that hey, why not have a new year resolution this year! So in my mind, my theme for 2020 is fearless! And as follows:

1. To lose weight and live a healthier live

2. To get BOSIET

3. To go to offshore

4. To attend all my friend's wedding

5. To go for Umrah with my first bonus

6. To start dating anyone to prep myself to get married at the age of 27. Which is on 2021

I thought its achievable! I ticked of the first two in the first two months of 2020. I thought to myself heyyyy i can finish this resolution this year. Thats me on early march tho. Boy was I wrong😂

So Covid happened and everything got screwed up. Lost weight and then gained like 20 times more (exaggeration maybe i dunno) during MCO! And then I didnt wanna go to offshore because i have fears for swab test (insane phobia you have no idea). Cant attend my friend's wedding at semenanjung bcs i constantly visit my grandma when im home so i need to be extra careful as to where i go/who i meet. Dont get me wrong i love her thats why i go the extra miles but it does get a lil frustrating at times. Also i just found out my probation got extended. After i risk my life going to work on MCO lol (never be loyal to company at least thats what i learned) so i dont receive bonus this year bcs of that and hence no umrah this year sigh. Oh and number six, ofcourse no dating because my circle is not expanded. Cant really meet anyone bcs of covid and ugh im pretty old fashion so i dont do online dating. Dont get me wrong im okay with online dating for anybody else but considering how my aunt got cheated and abused bcs she married someone off the internet, i think i'll stick with conventional dating just to be on the safe side. Soooooooo i guess haih depressing 2020 per say. Can someone pls wake me up from all of this. I think this is my new year's dream. Pls tell me its jan 1st 2020! Pls pinch me from this nightmare.

[maryjvnes]

i don’t want to be a superhero (2/?)

summary: you’re a new enhanced individual in new york that has the ability of pyrokinesis and telekinesis who gets on tony starks’ radar after you saved his car from crashing. meanwhile peter becomes intrigued with your abilities. part 1 is here 

a/n: sooo (y/b/n) sounds totally dumb so lets just call him adrian

edit!: i linked the wrong fic at first bc it’s 4am and i’m dumb srry

part 1

part 3

part 4

••• the next morning was rough, you still couldn’t believe tony stark came to your house never mind offer to take you to the avenger’s compound. so after a week of not leaving the apartment, you took a shower, put on some clothes that made you look a little less homeless, did your normal face routine and had a nice breakfast. “it’s only 12 pm and you actually look… not dead. nice.” adrian said getting a glass of orange juice. you were going to say something dumb back ag him but then your phone rang. it was an unknown number but you already knew who it was. “hello?” “is this (y/n)? i’m picking you up in 30 minutes so be downstairs i’m busy and i gotta be places okay?” you guessed this was happy hogan. who ironically didn’t sound so happy. “okay that’s fine but how did you get my number?” you heard a beep and realised he hung up. “he’s on his way?” your brother said from the couch, flipping through channels. “yeah just thirty minutes…” “hm” you began to put your keys and phone in your bag when you started feeling really nervous and your hands really warm. the only person you had ever been comfortable using your abilities around was your brother. what if something happened and you couldn’t control yourself? “adrian can yo-” "you want me to come with you?” he said looking up. you stood there, as if you were ten again. not being able to do anything without your big brother. "you can’t even go to the doctors by yourself, of course i’m coming with you.” happy picked you up and drove you to the compound, which by the way, was over an hour away. you barely went to school that was 20 minutes away because you didn’t want to walk. how did tony expect you to regularly get here? "there’s tony.” happy said pointing to the entrance of the lobby. you stepped out and walked towards him with your brother following. “isn’t it nice? the tower had it’s vulnerabilities and we needed more workspace. plus barnes is afraid of heights at times.” tony said as a welcoming. you felt comfortable with him yet you could sense he wasn’t. "well today hopefully i can just introduce you to some people and work out how we’re going to do this.” he said leading you into the building. you looked over at adrian who looked like a little boy at disneyland. you hoped he could keep it together but as you approached some kind of apartment setting you heard him gasp. there was a group of people sitting on couches that stood up as soon as they saw you walking towards them and you recognized them immediately. ”(y/n), i’d like you to meet the avengers. you’ve probably heard of them before? avengers, (y/n) the girl who bravely saved me from an almost accident.” tony said, motioning you to them. you suddenly felt really nervous and didn’t notice little pieces of furniture floating in the air behind them. “sis. the vase.” adrian whispered. "oh!” the vase fell with a crash as you tried set it down. they turned around and looked at it then back at you surprised. "i’m so sorry i got nervous that usually doesn’t happen i swear i-” "calm down, kid” captain america said almost laughing. "i know we’re a little intimidating. how old are you?” "s-seventeen.” they all looked at each other and then at tony with not-so-happy faces. "another kid, tony?” black widow said. you saw wanda maximoff shift and her facial expression seemed worried, almost scared. their reactions were making you so anxious you felt your skin start to heat up. "she’s not joining the team she’s here to learn how to figure out what she can do, okay? where is parker by the way? he was supposed to be here.” "him and tic-tac are finishing up training. they should be down soon. but don’t act like you’re not trying to recruit her tony, this is serious.” this time it was the falcon to speak up. you felt your brother pull you closer as tony and the rest of the avengers began having a full blown argument right in front of you. you felt like you had to say something. "excuse me!” you feigned a stronger, more confident voice and they stopped to look at you. “i don’t plan on joining the team. i know i’m only seventeen and i’m not ready for people’s lives to be in my hands. saving tony stark was an impulse that happened before i even knew what i was doing but he offered to help me control what i can do. obviously i don’t have complete control and i don’t know everything behind this, whatever this is. so no i don’t want to be a superhero and even if stark tried to recruit me i would say no.” everyone stood kind of looking at their shoes for a second as you all heard yelling come from down the hall. "you guys! scott threw the disk thingy at me and it worked! it made me tiny! tiny spider-man! you guys why a-” the boy making all the ruckus stopped talking as soon as he saw you. "shes already here? why didn’t anyon-” "kid just stop talking and come over here.” tony said. this was spider-man?! he looked like a 15 year old boy! you looked over at adrian whose jaw was on the floor at this point. "in case i missed the introductions, i’m p-peter parker. i’m spider-man.” the boy said, waving his hand. "we hadn’t even gotten to those because captain kill-joy made things weird.” tony said sending captain america a death glare. "well… let’s start over again. i’m (y/n), i’m seventeen and i can move things and start fires with my mind. and this is my big brother, adrian who is currently freaking out. he takes care of me.” you said pointing to your brother, who could only wave. "fire?! could you do it right now?” peter said, getting a little too close and comfortable. "uh i don’t know if that’s a good idea.” cap said. “it’s okay. i got it.” you said trying to reassure him but also yourself. without taking your eyes off peter’s you put your palms up and after feeling a little heat, you were holding two flames. "that’s…… so cool.” peter said looking right into them. something about the compliment made you blush. which didn’t go unnoticed by your brother as he cleared his throat and eyed spider-boy. you closed both hands to put out the flames and looked up at everyone and they looked almost as shocked as peter. "so what’s everyone else’s name?”

••• this was short bc i wanted to get the avengers first meeting out the way also people asked me to tag when i made a new chapter! thats so cool so: @rosaetum @inumorph @fandomingforever @do-you-mind-if-i-slytherin1

[briteboy]

MORE ASKS I’VE BEEN IGNORING!!!!!!!

GET ‘EM WHILE THEY’RE HOT

P.S. ALL OF U WHO SENT ME THE CHAIN THINGY ILYSOMUCH 

Why is her step-douche such a foken piece of shit? omg i hate him

some mysteries are never meant to be explained tbh. why is he so ugly and evil? who wronged him? but also who cares he’s in jail forever now good riddance ugly

I know this is probably really bad, but after I saw the newest molly posts, I thought of that video where the little girl is yelling "MISS KEISHA, MISS KEISHA, oh my fukin gosh she fukin dead"

OMFGFD I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT THAT VIDEO WAS SO I JUST WATCHED IT AND I’M LAUGHIN

i don’t blame u i bet when it happens i’m gonna be like “u know she ded”

(To the previous anon) i agree with you so, so much! In Poland, these dumbass politicians are letting shooting pregnant bisons (?? Im not sure how they're called) become legal. Like BITCH WHAT. Can you imagine??? A fucking pregnant lil' cow getting shot????? I feel Molly's pain on an emotional level rn (sorry if this is too nsfw, just needed to get that outta my system...)

i think this was in response to someone saying that hurting pregnant women is one of the worst crimes but um WTF shooting animals at all makes me itchy but pregnant ones..............nah that’s......nah

it’s ok get it outta ur system i’m here 4 u

the first thing I check in the morning is your account.... you have me whipped! ;|

OMG WHA LMAO REALLY that’s wild. i feel like i’m the only one who looks at my page which is dumb but like idk i still feel like a little kid that no one cares about lmao. but then you guys exist and amaze me with your responsiveness every day and i just ;____________; ily all

hi Sunny. first of all i'm gonna say i love your story and your editing style so much! your blog is goals like literally. i need an advice if you don't mind. you always find such amazing angles for your pictures while mine are so boring. any tips or tricks you can share?

HI thank you so much ;-; sooooo i’ve been thinking about this question the past couple of times i went in game, trying to figure out how to describe how i take pictures. for one thing i live in tab mode lmao. meaning you press the tab button on your keyboard to go into camera mode and get all these sexy angles and super zoom and stufffff. i almost always zoom in super far idk why. so there’s one tip. i honestly just play around with going up and down with the q and e keys (i think?) until i find angles i like. i take a lottttt of pictures with so many different angles just so i have a lot to choose from. basically i try to focus on different things in each picture in order to get a mix of the most diverse and dynamic shots possible. you just need to experiment and get creative. i know that’s the most vague advice ever but really just try a new angle that you’ve never considered before and i bet you’ll get cool results. an interesting setting is also the biggest factor, because certain objects and their placements will give you interesting results. 

i honestly want to print out your reaction pic to that one post and just hang it on my wall, put it in my heart locket necklace, stamp it on people's faces, start an email thread with it. i love it.

an add on to the last ask i sent about your reaction pic. i've been looking at it religiously since it was posted, and i dont regret a minute of it. LMAO I'LL STOP NOW.

SAKJDLJKGKSDAF STOPPPP LMAOOO i looked so ugly but that was my pure unadulterated reaction to that question and i trust you all to not judge my ugliness and instead share this reaction with me. i’m glad u liked it that much, i just printed it out and i’m cutting it into a small heart to put inside ur locket ok

everytime i hear cigarette daydreams by cage the elephant i think of a serious case of the novembers like its so fitting and then i get all emo when i listen to it lmao rip

OMMMMGGGGGGG YESSSSS how have i never made that connection before honestly. cage the elephant is one of my faves and i’ve seen them perform twice actually!! i’m watching the music vid for that song now and even that reminds me of my story ;-; i cry

thank you for sending this, and also i cry @ the fact that you used the actual title *dies* now this song is gonna make me emo til the end of time thx

i might sound like some crazy stalker fan but i just want to say you are so freakin awesome and nice and funny and cute and (i can go on forever) so caring! i love your blog so much and all the hard work and care you put into all your posts and followers. thanks for making my day and making me smile so much. you have no clue how much i look forward to seeing your posts and your hilarious hashtags and answers from asks and AMAZING story posts. im sorry i just wanted to let you know ur awesome ily

OFMG WHAT!!!!!! I AM ONLY AN EEL!!!!!! but no you don’t sound like a crazy stalker, i actually love this, you’re too sweet, thank you ;-; i’m just blushin so much reading this omg. YOU EVEN LIKE MY TAGS WOW that’s true love. ily ;-; <333

how do you get your sims' facial expressions to line up with your scenes? I feel like my sims' faces are never right :(

tbh i just use a lot of the same neutral poses...my go-to’s are @helgatisha‘s poses lol. they’re the easiest to work with when i do just plain talking scenes, and often i tweak my sims’ eyebrows and mouths with the liquify tool if i want them to look a bit more concerned, sad, mad, happy, etc., it works like a charm!! i also tend to play around with angles, you’d be surprised how much a different angle can enhance a scene.

Hey smol bean, I'm sent you an ask and now I feel bad that it probably made you feel anxious because you didn't answer it. It was the one about you not liking my posts, I have anxiety too so I'm sorry If I made you feel sad. I think I'm just looking for validation from people I look upto you get me? Anyway sorry again, don't worry about it! Love you!

hiya bb, i know you saw my answer to your original post (and i’m sorry it got some negative attention, i didn’t mean for that to happen by any means) anyway don’t sweat it, and i really appreciate this follow-up message. you didn’t make me feel sad, i just wanna know what i can do. it’s just a hard question y’know. i understand what you mean, i think everyone wants validation to some degree. tbh you can just come off anon and message me, i promise it’s not as nerve-wracking as it seems! ily

How did you make Santi's tattoos? I want some like that for my Sims but idk how to do it

boop

I HAVE A FEELING THAT MOLLY IS GOING TO DIE DURING THE BIRTH OF THE BEAN OR IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH HER STEPFATHER FINDING OUT ABOUT THE BEAN

WELP U WERE RIGHT ABOUT ONE THING

how did you make your characters page on your blog like that?

uoohhh like what?? i used this theme (monolog) if that’s what you mean aheh. here’s a guide on how to use custom page themes

okay so THIS IS MY THEORY: they might keep the baby and molly might actually carry it to full term, but then the kid dies in childbirth and either molly also dies or maybe kills herself or gets killed later? or maybe she's still alive but just won't speak to santi anymore cause she like can't look him in the eye after all of that or idk?? since ppl were sending theories i wanted to add mine lmao. another possible theory is that the stepdad finds out and kills her but thats TOO DARK omg

TOO DARK U SAY...WELL!!! it’s not AS dark as you guessed but only marginally

If Molly turns out to be alive and raising their kid alone (though from what I'm seeing in response to most questions I think that may not be the route) am I allowed to slap Santi (unless Molly didn't give him the option to help) because raising a child alone is not easy I've watched my mom do it for years.

YEAH i would give you permission to slap him lmao he would be a grade A piece o’ shit if that were the case. i would never ever write that tho because santi does own up to his actions if they’re that detrimental. his altruistic nature, no matter how backwards, would never allow him to do that.

There will be complication with the abortion so she will not be able to carry a baby anymore and she's going to kill herself OR her step dad is going to find out and he'll beat her to death. And in both situation Santi his blaming himself because he wasn't there at the right time... Okay I really really hope I'm wrong now !

I don't even follow your story very closely but every time I see your posts my heart hurts.

OMFG...that’s how u know the pain is real

but like wow my stuff is really so visceral that even my apathetic followers can feel the hurt...that’s real...that’s real my guy

omg!! you should 100% play or at least watch a playthrough of life is strange! legit the best game ever made, its so beautiful. the storyline kills you a thousand times over (much like your beautiful story) <3333

yaaaa i’ve heard lots of good things about it!! my bf played it actually, maybe he’ll revisit it again someday and i’ll watch him do it (i’m only a fan of video games if i can watch them like a movie lmao) thank you btw <3

I am shook and I worship you and your story and you are amazing WOW BYE

WORSHIP LMAO WHAT!!! PLS I AM UNDESERVING...ily tho don’t worship false gods

Do you let Molly and the younger versions of your characters frolic around your main save or do they have a separate one?

UM YES LMAO because i didn’t even know you could have separate saves until after i started the flashbacks lmao i’m...a noob. i don’t want separate saves anyway because 1) it’s too much of a hassle switching back and forth and 2) it gets too confusing for me and i’d be afraid of overwriting one save with another and NOPE too much anxiety for that soooo yeah there’s three santis in my game: child, teen and adult lmfao (fun fact: teen santi’s name is literally just Lil Santi)

I made it to my senior year with 6 A's and 1 B ... Be proud of me too? 😂 Lmao I told this to people and some of them were just like .. okay cool?! LMAO it's so funny but also kinda sad

I AM PROUD OF YOU TOO!!!!!!!!! my smart childrens

“okay cool” UM PLEASE that’s a feat...at my school if you got an A in a class in senior year you were allowed to be exempt from the final. so yeah that rules. ily

[underwaterwanderlust]

I was tagged by @stuckinthisocean to answer a questions about myself thingy 

Basically what happens is I answer the 11 questions she asked, and then I ask 11 new ones for the people I tag, ok ready set go

Her 11 questions:

1) What is your favourite smell? I like the smell of rain, or lilacs, or an old house with the windows open

2) What language do you wish you could speak fluently? I wish I spoke French better than I do. I’m semi-fluent, but I dont really get enough day to day interactions to become for real fluent. Working on it 3) Who do you look up to the most? Lol I have bpd, this changes from day to day 4) Describe a perfect day Slightly windy, not too warm. T shirt weather, but with cloud cover. I wake up on my own, my friends are with me from a night of partying before. We make breakfast together. We go on a walk, we talk, we laugh. We draw together, we take pictures of each other, we put flowers in each others’ shoes. After we’re all tired out and go home to nurse our respective maladies from the night of partying, I make myself a fantastic dinner, using a lot of butter, while listening to the radio. I watch a movie while eating dinner, and play a narrative video game after the movie. Then I get a message from an old friend, and they wanna skype before bed. We chat, I fall asleep with skype on.  5) What countries have you been to? Canada (Vancouver, Calgary, Toronto), America (Washington, Oregon, Hawaii, California, Denver, New York) England, France, Italy, Germany, Netherlands

6) Do you like your name? Why/why not? I do like my name! I have several names (Greta, Birdy, and most recently Wayne) but I do still like my birth name Greta. I picked it myself actually. When my mom was about 7 months pregnant with me, she had a dream where this kid (with big curly hair) came and tugged on her duvet and said, hands on her hips, “My name is Greta” and my mom woke up in a cold sweat and here I am. 7) If you could change one thing in the world, what would that be? Whoa thats a little too much responsibility for me. Umm. Either that the bees are healthier, or that everyone had universal health care.  8) Which song never fails to cheer you up? Moonlight Desires by Gowan or Africa by Toto  9) What is your favourite quote? I’m gonna say that depends on for what, and when you’re asking.  10) What are you looking for in an ideal romantic partner? Oh gosh. I’m actually having a really hard time with that right now. About a year ago some pretty horrible trauma shit happened and on top of all the other things that had happened I just sort of snapped. Since then I’ve had some pretty deeply rooted trust issues. I’m having trouble seeing the point of dating someone, if I can just sleep with people, and get my emotional needs met and given, by and to, my friends. So I guess what I’m looking for is someone who I feel comfortable enough with to trust them not to hurt me? That’d be the primary thing. And I’d really love someone who I find continually interesting. Someone who makes me feel special. Someone I want to hold when they get upset as opposed to wanting to tell them to fuckin’ deal with it. Someone who makes me feel adventurous and alive, but not like I’m in danger. Here’s the problem, is I don’t think this person exists. 

My shortened answer to that, on a less serious note, is that my type is Jake Peralta from Brooklyn Nine-Nine  11) Who is your favourite author? Don’t have one, but my favourite books are Jitterbug Perfume, The Song of Achilles, Looking for Alaska, and Ella Enchanted 

Ok here’s my questions

1. Have you ever been in love?  2. What sort of ways did you pass the time as a kid 3. Do the idea of angels bring you comfort or make you uncomfortable? 4. Who in your life makes you really really happy?  5. What’s your favourite kind of weather? 6. If you had to pick one song to reflect your mood right now, what would it be? 7. If you were a mystical creature, what would you be? 8. Are you one of those people that has colours or personalities for different numbers or letters? 9. Whats the biggest secret you’re willing to admit on this thing? 10. What’s something that makes you feel special in the universe?  11. If you could suddenly be brilliant at one thing, what would it be?

@a-penguin-in-space @stories-to-live-by @xllxni @yuyuk0 @invioletswithyou @mademoiselle-psychosis @yawnwater @thepinkpurplestreak @travelingtinman

[holy-chanyeollie]

Some Facts

thanks for tagging me sunshine @jadezx ly xo

1. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? -yeah my mums my best friend and my dads alright (nah i love him)  😂 2. Who did you last say “i love you” to? - i would say probably to one of my friends   3. Do you regret anything? - sure there are things i regret but nothing i can do bout it now 4. Are you insecure? - sometimes i am but ometimes i dont care 😂   5. What’s your relationship status? - single  6. How do you want to die?  - nicely 7. What did you last eat? - fruit toast thingy 8. Played any sports? - Soccer/football 9. Do you bite your nails? - i use to really bad but now ionly bite them if im really nervous or if they break and need to come off 10. When was your last physical fight? - does my brother count??  11. Do you like someone? -  Theres this really cute girl i meet at my drama course i did :o there was also a super cute guy there aswell but he is from england and he was one of the tutors :’( so maybe im crushin a lil? lets hope they go next year tho!  12. Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? -  you betcha  13. Do you hate anyone at the moment? - there are people i really dislike but i dunno about hate 14. Do you miss someone? - yeah i do  15. Have any pets? - 4 cats, a lizard and the love of my life which is my princess dog 16. How exactly are you feeling at the moment? - tired and a lil sad and sore but i think im going out tonight so yay 17. Ever made out in the bathroom? - hahah no  18. Are you scared of spiders? - big ones 19. Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? - i think so 20. Where was the last place you snogged someone? -  😂 😂 😂 😂 21. What are your plans for this weekend? - work work work, party, sleep, work  22. Do you want to have kids? how many? - i want 3 kids i think 

23. Do you have piercings? how many? 

- 2 just ny ears 

24. What is/are/were your best subject(s)? - my best subjects were Drama and Media studies  25. Do you miss anyone from your past? - of course 26. What are you craving right now? - sleep 😂   27. Have you ever broken someone’s heart? - i hope not?? 28. have you ever been cheated on? - Nope  29. Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? - nope 30. What’s irritating you right now?‘ - my back 31. Does somebody love you? - i would hope so 32. What is your favourite color? - pink, blue, purple and yellow ohh and orange 33. Do you have trust issues? - doesnt everyone?  34. Who/what was your last dream about? - hahahahaah it was actually about chanyeol and my dog  😂 35. Who was the last person you cried in front of? - i guess it was infront of alot of people? i was saying goodbye to one of the closest friends i made at the drama course and i was fine then she starte to cry and i starte bawling my eyes out and didnt stop crying for the rest of the day specially when i said goodbye to the cute tutor from england he was gr8    36. Do you give out second chances too easily? - hmmm depends  37. Is it easier to forgive or forget? - Forgive 38. Is this year the best year of your life? - ive gotta say that this year has been pretty shitty for me but cant be as bad as last year!  39. How old were you when you had your first kiss? - like 3 i think? i have a cute photo of it and the person i had it with has grown up really fricken hot  😂 40. Have you ever walked outside completely naked? - well in  a towel? 51. Favourite food? - noodles and vegemite on toast  52. Do you believe everything happens for a reason? - i geuss 53. What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? - Watched sungjaes and peniels insta live video, i actually fell asleep watching it  😂 54. Is cheating ever okay? - NOOOOOOOOOO 55. Are you mean? - Sometimes 56. How many people have you fist fought?
 - no one 57. Do you believe in true love? - I dunno thats a hard question??? 58. Favourite weather? - rainy (when im not at work tho im in bed watching movies or out exploring in gumboots and a raincoat) 59. Do you like the snow? - it doesnt really snow in my town 60. Do you wanna get married? - nah i dont but im not totlly against it 61. Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? - hmmmm i dunno cause i call my dog baby  😂 62. What makes you happy?
 - my friends, kpop, my dog, my family, Hansol Vernon Chwe, Park Chanyeol, Jeon Jungkook, Day6, did i say my dog and kpop ??  63. Would you change your name? - nah i like mine  64. Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?
 - hahahah the last person i kissed was a friend and we kised jokingly so noooo?  65. Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? - i guess it would depennd?? 66. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? - hahaha yeah of course we tight af  67. Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? - online? then a friend offline then my dad ?? 68. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? - one of me best friends  69. Do you believe in soulmates? - Yeah i guess i do, i think my dog is my soulmate tho 70. Is there anyone you would die for? my mum, i love her alot. and probs channie and vernonie lol trash

That was fun  😂 😂 😂 😂 im gonna taaaag @swindle-r @jeonuwonu @hanstolemyheart98 @aly-zzle @minnyhyuk if you have already done it or just dont wanna ya dont have to xo ly all

[michameinmicha]

if u want to do all the sp asks...? i'd like to read that honestly ._. hope this ain't weird...

noooo thats not weird thats super sweet thanks anon

30 South Park Asks(this got really long somehow so i put a cut here)

1. Favorite main character and why they’re your favorite?

Kenny McCormick and because he’s the best.(i think he’s super cute but also kinda disgusting and also funny and also loyal and loving and multi-faceted and i just love him okay)

2. Least favorite main character and why they’re your least favorite?

uh this is kind hard? depends i guessi don’t like Cartman for example but i think he’s an interesting character…?maybe Randy Marsh? i don’t like him and i don’t like his Stories in the show usually… ahhhh idk this is a hard question…..

3. Favorite side character and why?

ohhhh i love Karen so muchh she’s not really that much of an interesting Character on her own but i love her relationship with Kenny obviouslyplus i love most of the fourth graders and the goth kids omgthat’s all i can think of rightnow

4. Least favorite side character and why?

i don’t like most of the grown ups they’re boring and annoyingand they sometimes steal the spotlight (especially in new seasons) that i think should be more about the kids but w/e

5. List as many of the South Park kids as you can in order from fave to least fave!

oh god uhhhhhhKenny, Stan, Kyle, Butters, Wendy, Ike, Tweek, Craig, Jimmy, Bebe, Nicole, David, Karen, Token, Heidi, Cartmanuhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmm is that enough? i feel like my brain doesn’t work right today sry…

6. Any characters you feel you can relate to?

Obviously Kenny, couldn’t tell u why thoStan especially the assburgers episodesKyle every time he gets angrysame with Wendy

7. Favorite adult and why?

oh man…. Sheila Broslovski…?she’s annoying but also pretty badass

8. Least favorite adult and why?

pretty much all of themmr garrison is bad pc principal is bad randy marsh is bad i cant even remember that many spontaneously but i dont like most of them so…

9. Any characters that you think deserve more spotlight?

KENNY most of the girlsCraigs gangthe goth kids are always super enterntainingu get my drift

10. Any dead/one-time characters that you want back?

loved damien he was greatalso le mole

11. Are you someone who has a lot of headcanons for SP characters?

i have headcannons for my faves (especially kenny ahhhhhhhhhh)i think i have a lot of ideas for most of the kids but idk how accurate they are so i mostly just kinda keep them to myself i guess

12. Tell me a headcanon that you have for [character name]!

theres no character name here so u get one for kenny (Hah! who wouldve guessed): i imagine he’d have pretty crooked teeth but his parents can’t afford braces for him and he’s kinda envious of stan and kyle who both get braces in their teens (i imagine cartman has annoyingly perfect teeth and kyle hates him for it) and he thinks they look really cute and wishes he could have them too. when he’s older he saves up for a while and get himself these invisiline thingies and he likes them even though they’re not as cute as normal braces

this kinda got outta hand i’m sorry

13. Favorite ship? Tell us why!

Stenny (also like k2) (and stylenny)i honestly dunno why i guess kenny’s just my fave and stan’s my second fave and also i just think they would have such a sweet friendship to lovers thing and i love them dearly ok

14. Least favorite ship? Tell us why! (But don’t tag it; that’s rude!)

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhwell since literally everything gets shipped by someone i feel the need to say kid/adult, non-con and incest (fucking obviously)i don’t really like cartman in any relationship because i dont really like cartman(i’m not very interested in style although it can be very sweet don’t get me wrong i wouldnt put it as my least favourite i just think it’s a little overrated)i just generally could get into most ships if its well written and the other way around i guess…?

15. List as many SP ships as you can think of in order of fave to least fave!Stenny, K2, styenny, creek, Style, stylendy, bunny, crenny, staig, stendy, cryle, kenman(?), kyman

(can’t think of more spontaneously)

16. Favorite episode and why?

i love the super hero ones and the lord of the rings-y ones and also episodes that are about kennyalso the ones about the kids are usually good i just like them to go on adventures and have fun ok

17. Least favorite episode and why?

episodes about the grown ups i feel like i’m repeating myself here but yeah they’re boring and annoyingironically enough i don’t like most of the topical, political episodes too much

18. Describe an episode you’d like to see happen someday!

i think i saw this described by someone once and it kinda stuck with mean episode where kenny’s family get super rich for some reason (and probably loses all their money again by the end of the episode since this is still south park) i just think that’d be interesting and also a good setup for some much needed character development 

19. To you, what’s the most meaningful moment in the show?

i have no idea how to answer this honestly?

20. To you, what’s the most disgusting/worst moment in the show?

oh god are you kidding me? the whole show is disgusting…

21. Do you enjoy episodes that have a focus on the parents/adults?

ummmmmm i think there are some that i liked…? 

22. Do you enjoy when episodes/seasons have an overarching plot?

oh dudey that’s a question to write a book on…i think it could be good but they’re not very good at it yet…?maybe in a few seasons… there’s potential definitely but i’ts kinda hard to answer because the old seasons dont have an overarching plot but to me are way better than the newer ones which haveif that makes any sense…?about episodes i loved the two parters of the lord of the rings thingy so yeah…?

23. What’s the first episode you ever watched?i’m not sure but the first one i remember watching on german mtv in the middle of the night once was the wikileaks lemmiwings one (with the hamster trying to destroy that gossip site (god i’m bad at describe stuff today)) then i saw the assburgers ones in the netherlands on tv before i actively watched all seasons starting with the first

24. What’s your favorite South Park song?

la resistance!!!!!minorities at my waterpark is a sweet one too tho

oh god and the lets make bullying kill itself is so gooood too yes!

25. How and why did you get into South Park?

because of fanart i saw and i wanted to get to know the charactersi bingewatched it all like two years ago (?) in the summer holidaysbefore that i had only come across it on tv in german only and i really don’t like the dubbed version but when i saw it in the netherlands in english with subs i realised it’s way funnier in the original so i started watching it

26. Have you ever felt weird for liking South Park?

kinda when i try to explain why i love the characters to friends who haven’t really seen the show (or who have seen it and thought it was bad) but generally i dont hang out with people who make me feel weird for liking the things i like so its not really a problem

27. Have you watched every single episode?

i think i didnt see some of the latest season

28. Have you played any South Park games? Which ones?

i really wanted and still want to get the stick of truth but its kinda hard to get the uncut version here so i haven’t

29. How well would you say you know South Park trivia?

not very; i’m so bad at remembering stuff

30. Tell us a SP fact; any one will do!

there’s very little cannon facts about how the kids are gonna grow up and pretty much a lot about them and their appearance and stuff at all and you can literally imagine them in any way you want and i think that’s beautiful

i’m sorry this got kinda confusing and repetitive and vague (my brain didn’t cooperate with me as much as i wouldve expected)but thank you for asking me it was fun still