#but i just really needed to cover the importance of them in d3 because it was keeping me up at night

[she-is-ovarit]

This is for all the younger gen Z women, particularly those of you within the ages of 17 to roughly 23. This is written from an American perspective, things might be a little different depending on where you're from.

I graduated high school with the unconscious assumption that certain systems will take care of me. The medical system would educate me on proper nutrition and health issues was probably my largest underlying assumption, but really I just had trust in institutions generally.

This isn't true. You are responsible for learning. As an example, I have been vegetarian since age 14. Nobody talked to me about proper nutrition, they just told me I needed to eat more protein.

I lived a decade of my life having shortness of breath, sleeping issues, clumsiness, cold hands and feet, having brain fog, extreme fatigue, heightened anxiety, etc. My period was extremely light and brown, it'd last for about 2 or so days. I'd go and talk about these problems, and telling doctors that I was vegetarian was one of the first things that came out of my mouth just with any visit because I knew at least that piece was important to communicate.

There was really no action taken over the span of about 10 years. I was told the period thing was normal, that changes for women. A sleep specialist let me know that feeling exhausted was also normal. The brain fog was probably due to anxiety. Here, try allergy medication (tbh that did help for other reasons). Then one day I just asked them to check my vitamin and mineral levels. Prior to this I didn't think you can make requests to doctors, I thought you showed up and they performed tests on what they recommended. With some reluctance from my primary care physician and some compromise because she said my insurance wouldn't cover testing things like B12 levels (I later found out from a nurse that, they would, she would have just needed to fill out extra paperwork), she did some tests.

I found out both my iron and D3 levels were low. What else could be?

I later learned pretty much all the vitamins common to be low for vegetarians were low. D3, magnesium, vitamin Bs, iron, and healthy fats. Bought some liquid vitamins (because the body only absorbs 10% of the pill supplements), began eating an avocado a day, my period became normal for the first time in nine years, and I am able to function.

Another example of how human systems won't educate you: I don't have feeling in some of my toes due to wearing incorrect sized footwear for years resulting in permanent nerve damage. I'm size 11.5 in women's, and I was relying on someone to tell me how proper footwear worked, because surely the guy in the minimum wage position working the footwear section would know.

Don't trust human systems to guide you through how certain things work. Seek specific specialists and experts when you can, and inform yourself on your own. Don't blindly trust search engines like Google, it's not like how it used to be when I was growing up and many millennial adults will tell you to "just google things" because we're used to finding actual substantive answers when we do. However, now, usually whoever pays is who makes the first page or two of search engines, it has nothing to do with what information is "most correct". Don't be afraid to request certain tests be done by doctors or certain referrals made to different specialists.

Edit: And also, I've found general practitioners are terrible when you walk in and tell them about several different symptoms at one time. They're more used to treating one symptom at a time, and they treat the symptom not the root cause. If you go in with a runny nose, general practitioners are going to throw medications at you to try and treat the runny nose, not look deeper into what's causing the runny nose. It's equivalent to if you're in a boat and it's sinking, they're bailing out water without actually fixing the hole or trying to figure out where it is, with the exception of emergency situations and even then it depends.

[chronotsr]

No. 4 - D1, Descent into the Depths of the Earth (August 1978)

Author(s): Gary Gygax Artist(s): David C. Sutherland III (Cover), David A. Trampier Level range: Average of 10, preferrably party size 7+ players Theme: Underground exploration Major re-releases: D1-2 Descent into the Depths of the Earth, GDQ1-7 Queen of the Spiders

Wait, really? This adventure has never gotten an official adaptation after 1e? That feels really weird. Granted Queen of Spiders in particular would absolutely work with 2e, but, wow. Is there a reason for that?

Ahh, 1e cover art. Looks like hot fucking garbage in the best way. Well, at least it's not a trace? You may be aware that early DND had a bit of an art theft problem (mostly stealing off of comic covers), but I don't actually have a list of all the known cases -- finding art credits at all is enough hassle as is without tracking down which paintings are also stolen. The usual suspect is "Greg Bell" and if you want to look this up the word you need to google is "Swipes", not traces. Just, be aware that's a thing going forward.

We start off on a weak footing: a light retcon. The ending of G3 didn't really imply that the drow had an escape route to the underdark in the Hall, at least not going off the map, but the text of D1 does. It didn't really even have a reason to pursue any drow into the, well it's not called the Underdark yet. In fact, it's going to be a hot minute til then, it'll receive that name in '86 from a not particularly liked supplement that got pumped out during the TSR Money Issues era. So for now, it's just The Depths. G1-3 were highly enclosed dungeons, D1 is a wilderness hexcrawl situation. Which is kinda strange, since like the G series, the D series was a tournament module. The answer to this conundrum, is that it isn't a conundrum, because only D2-D3 were used at GenCon XI, as well as an alternate Q1 that never was. Shame! The Lolth egg raid sounds cool.

A big hexcrawl, in fact! It's almost weird to me that D1 is the middle of a sequence at such a high level, rather than the beginning of a sequence at a low level, simply because there's so much stuff? Hexcrawls aren't my jam (admittedly I've only played in one ever, but I have Forever GM syndrome very hard so maybe one day that'll be fixed…) so it's hard to not see something this huge and go "wow this must be totally overwhelming to run". But we will press on dauntlessly!

We get some guidance on how to run this, including to really sell the "spooky cave" vibes. Gary is one again strangely invested in the importance of caving itself, but here it feels a bit more appropriate than it did in G2. Happily, shockingly, excellently: there IS a way to secure the Drow's favor from the word jump! Wiping out the Mind Flayer camp will have a, not 100% but extremely high chance of the drow FINALLY leaving you alone. Yay! And included in the module are some bonus cave battlemaps in case you need to random encounter in a cave. Also yay! Actually, in general in this introductory section Gary is generally sending out good game design vibes, going to great trouble to mention "if they're being careful, don't fuck them over" and "just straight up tell them you can't teleport very far down here" and "make sure you tidy up this framework into a real adventure". All very good signs!

The artwork is, broadly, much cooler than it has been up to this point. Which is good, because we're getting a whole lot of random tables here. They do a nice thing in this section, where they give 'purposes' to a lot of the random encounters, not full-on spark tables but at least knowing that the ghouls serve the drow is a very handy "why are they here?" to know.

The adventure lightly, reasonably, railroads you into your first encounter -- a checkpoint. It's a pretty rote fight, there are two factions but they can't really be posed against one another in any obvious way. The sub boss has a faerie fire grenade, and the big boss has a cloak that lets you turn into a lurker to fly away in a pinch. It's lightly teased that they worship Lolth here. But otherwise it's mostly just "welcome to the underdark motherfucker!"

There's a brief illithid encounter, which is likewise rote. Chop em' up and move on.

Finally, you have your dungeon-dungeon, which is a trog warren. It's mostly just Some Drow and Some Trogs, and it almost feels obligatory? It's got that "bunch of random caves" vibe that I do not like in dungeons. B1 and 2 will both end up doing this. But among the funny things is:

The first appearance of a death lance (drains d4 levels) on some bad motherufcker drow fighter lady

The medal you can negotiate from the drow can also just be looted

A lich is just, kind of taking a nap. the cheeky little fucker has put a magic mouth on basically everything everywhere, so you're flooded with magic aura if you think you're going to see shit coming. He's got some really neat shit, like a portable hole, but unfortunately his non-magic valuables are extremely cursed. Figures.

Sometimes I forget that ghouls and ghasts are sentient and intelligent, since I have had it so trained in my mind that ghouls are essentially smart zombies rather than people in any meaningful sense, but not so in ADND land! These ghouls are trying to ditch the drow they serve, which, understandable.

Thing I only learned now: ADND had many, many sphinxes. Andro (big tough and good), crio (smaller, dumber), gyno (smaller, a little meaner, classical sphinx behaviors including riddles), and hieraco (evil, vicious, and animalbrained). Ours here is the hieracosphinx, which is a pet of some drow lady.

Hopefully we can agree that old timey bugbears were silly little guys. I don't buy that they're evil, they're too silly! And yawn the usual lady monster / child monster dilemma is here, how droll. Your party picked a side 30 sessions ago and now it's just procedural.

Apparently the dark elves and trogdolytes practice mutual aid with one another, though Gary specifies it's coercive so not like that put your flag down. I do think it'd be pretty funny to reveal that the trogs are Actually Really Good and have a lot to teach others about societal organization. There's not really much to say about it as-written, it's just more of that mothers/child dilemma tripe.

At the end, an actually cute little trick that I cannot fathom the party ever working out without the Drow Merchant just straight telling them: There is a room with a magical pool in it. The pool is surrounded by a ton of small gem, which if removed, magically reduce any nearby gems in size and value. But, if you toss gems into the pool, they increase in size and value. Neat! Infinite money machine!

The adventure ends with the unveiling of a new monster-people: the Jermlaine, which are basically just mean little guys who sneak around and cause trouble. Not really a threat, just extremely annoying. Your guys will wanna chop them up for being assholes, but really they're just like the most petty guy at your job. It's a weird addition, but not unwelcome. On the whole, D1 is some lovely and mildly ambitious connective tissue bridging the D series together, and I'm actually kind of fond of it now. Maybe my players will visit The Depths soon…

The adventure ends on an illustration of ya bois taking care of some trolls and shit. Thanks Dave!

[joesbbqandfootmassage]

Jane and Carlos in D3:

A Thanksgiving Feast

So I have already made my obligatory Janelos defense post that every blog on this website owes them, and I will link that here.

But I kind of barely touched on just how good they are in D3. Like, insanely good.

Devie and Janelos are the God tier Descendants ships and somebody had to say it.

It figures that Disney would choose to focus on the basic dynamic that is Bal even though they have two amazing VK/AK pairings to work with.

I ain’t saying they needed to kick Ben and Mal from the series because I do still think they’re cute, I’m just saying that Devie and Janelos also deserved their own Enchanted Lake First Date Scene.

Now in D2 both ships were given roughly three major scenes to work with and then of course all of their background dance scenes in You and Me.

Both Janelos and Devie doing different variations of the hug and spin number. (Holy fluff the Devie one was fantastic)

And they both had pretty good character arcs as well.

While Bal pretty much have the same character arc every movie, Janelos and Devie approach one thing at a time. In D2 that was Evie reaffirming to Doug that she wants him, not a stereotypical prince. Strengthening their relationship.

Meanwhile Janelos was giving both Carlos and Jane the chance to step out of their bubbles and explore this new sensation called love.

And you can really believe the time that has passed between these relationships when D3 finally rolls around.

Naturally Jane and Carlos are a touchy-feely kind of couple, linking arms and wrapping arms around shoulders and a lot of background hugs that were cut from the film.

Normally this would probably annoy me, but in this case it makes sense for Carlos and Jane because of his touch starvation.

Jane is able to hold onto him like it's just something normal for her to do with him, unlike any person on the Isle ever.

So in D3 you can see how comfortable they are with one another and just with affection in general.

But that's not all D3 has to offer for them, oh no.

Because D3 is also the movie where Carlos' evolution to Hero of the Isle is the most evident.

It's something you can finally see in every little action.

I'm gonna be honest, D3 should have been Evie's movie.

My sister and I pointed this out as we read all of the VK's posters and saw that Mal's had her’s as, "The Liberator."

To which we both went, "That is a bunch of fluffing BS."

Because everybody knows that it was EVIE'S idea to start transferring kids over to the Isle.

I can't even imagine how many meetings she had to attend, presentations she had to give and trouble she had to deal with from the higher ups.

Because D3 is when they are finally able to bring Dizzy over to Auradon and they've already graduated high school at this point.

And yet, Mal gets the praise.

Mal gets the credit.

And when they encounter their first bump in the road, it's Mal who shuts down the program. Destroying all of Evie's hard work.

While it’s not an official term used, I’ve been calling Carlos, Evie and Uma all “Heroes of the Isle.” Mainly because most, if not all, of their most prominent actions in the films (when actually given any) have been for the sake of the Isle and the children they wish to protect and save.

And it can switch from Heroes of the Isle to Heroes from the Isle, mostly depending on what stance my argument has.

This stance being tilted toward Janelos, though I will probably post another rant talking about how Evie should have been the main character of D3.

Now this is the first time we see Carlos actively having someone to protect since Dude in D1, the second he returns to Auradon from the Isle he calls Jane several times. He then spends a good deal of the movie before Jane comes back being mopey. Which is something you notice if you watch a movie three times in a row and those two other times all you do is look at Carlos.

It’s an interesting thought to have in your head, Carlos - A Protector. 

While interesting, it never surprised me.

You can see a lot of his protectiveness in D2 when they return to the Isle, with him usually being the first one to charge.

And it only took me so long to notice that because I’ve had an image of Carlos built in my head.

Nothing can ruin your outlook of a character faster than the fandom’s perception of them.

If you listened to all the people going on and on about how Shaggy from Scooby-Doo is clearly coded to be a stoner, you might miss that he was a star gymnast and a pro-golfer. How many of y’all knew that Daphne was a straight A student?

The Descendants’ fandom has usually painted Carlos as the obligatory, “Smol bean, too precious for this world. Must protecc.”

Which is fine, if the character is clearly supposed to be interpreted as those things.

Carlos, while definitely too good for both the Isle and Auradon, is not a weak and helpless character. Sure he’s soft spoken and really really nice, like omg there is no way him and Cruella share the same DNA, but he also did really well in tourney and fencing.

He’s perceptive and quick to adapt.

And on top of all of that, he’s hurt.

So many years of being a doormat on the Isle, not only for his mother but every other person that looked down on him.

Despite all of that, he still cares about people.

He still has so much love to give to people he knows need it.

And in D3, Carlos seems to finally know who he is when separated from the VK or AK title.

He wants to help VKs transfer onto Auradon.

He wants a place to house lost boys and girls who were like him, no safe place to go.

He wants to be a vet.

And he wants to love Jane.

When he reunites with Jane in the second act of the movie, you can see that it’s not just Carlos that feels this way.

Once again, just like in D2, Jane fully reciprocates all of his feelings maybe even more so with the way she always renders his breathless every time.

Jane and Carlos give and receive love with no counter or limit in sight, they snuggle and hug and just... touch.

They make promises to stay safe, to keep each other safe, to stay together.

Always surprising the other with the reminder that they do indeed love each other.

Because they were two lonely kids that needed to love and be loved.

And the trilogy ends giving both of them exactly that.

And this is all just whatever I can glean from the movies.

When Amazon finally decides to send me all of the books it’s over for you hoes.

[descendantofthesparrow]

Commission work - Harry Hook x reader - Swann snapped - oneshot

Commissioned by @thebookbakery

-The other one would take place after D3 where everyone is out together. Y/N is the daughter of Elizabeth Swan and Will Turner, but she dresses like the princesses and spends more time with her mother than her father. She’s the only Auradon girl not scared of Harry, so he keeps messing with her (he doesn’t know who her parents are) so when she snaps and he finds out who her dad is, he is kinda shocked and his little crush on her spikes up-

*D3 has most if not all the vks graduated from Auradon prep (mostly talking bout the older vks, like Mal, Evie, Jay. So those who are the same age will not be at Auradon prep but Auradon college.  (Harry, (y/n), Emma *not canon character, Jackie *not canon character, n other characters like that)

=

You let out a heavy sigh as you set your bag on the cafe table next to Emma and Jackie, pulling your skirt forward as you sat down. “hey Turner” Jackie mumbled, shoving several fries into their mouth, their black lined eyes staring at you as you let out a heavy sigh and leaned into your hand “uh oh, is it-“

You pursed your lips as you glanced at them. “-Hook” you muttered,  moving your fingers and covering your eyes as you sighed again “he just-won’t leave me alone.” Harry Hook, the son of captain Hook himself, had decided you were the object of his “affections” aka bothering the hell out of you until you snapped.

Luckily you had kept your composure and took his usual teasing in stride, and didn’t let him get any satisfaction from it. But it didn’t stop him from continuing to bug you; stealing your things, picking food off your plate, poking you incessantly when he sat next to you in your few shared classes, heckling you, holding up your important school books over his head; and many other things that ticked you off.

Emma hummed in sympathy, picking at her carrots. Harry was a loner at Auradon Uni, didn’t talk to anyone unless he needed to, kept to himself, left almost everyone alone; everyone except you, and no one could really see why.

Except for Harry himself, and it was because you weren’t scared of him. or at least the only one who didn’t give him a wary side-eye when he walked past you; and he latched onto that, happy that there was at least one person he could bug without them afraid of him ‘hooking’ them at any moment’s notice.

Harry was a very…people needing person, he always liked having someone with him; even if they didn’t particularly like him. Even on the isle he had someone, either his sisters or Uma, or even Jay.

And now he had you, and while you swore up and down that he hated you, it was actually quite the opposite.

He was just a fucking dumbass who had a crush and had no idea how to show his feelings properly, so he acted like a 5-year-old who liked their classmate. Teasing, being mean, stealing their things; just in general being stupid.

Anyway, back to the story with our (y/n); you sighed and rested your head in your hands “I know he’s an isle kid who grew up knowing nothing but evil, but does he have to be that annoying?” Jackie shrugged, standing and walking over to the counter to get your (preferred drink from a café) and setting it in front of you.

“if I didn’t know any better” Emma chuckled, waving her fork in your face “I’d say he has a crush on you” you rolled your eyes, pushing away her fork.

“cha right; we’re twenty, not five, if he liked me that way, he wouldn't be such a jackass” Jackie and Emma burst into laughter at that, and you smirked in response, sipping at your drink. You sighed as you looked down at your watch, standing from the table and collecting your things “I have to get to practice guys, sorry” the two waved you off.

“oh you’re fine, we know how it is; go kick their butts~” Emma cheered you on, Jackie waving you goodbye erratically as you turned and walked away, your skirt flaring around you as you did.

-

Harry walked around the town just outside of campus, bag on his shoulder and hands in his pockets; bored out of his mind.

He didn’t even know why he accepted Ben’s offer of college, but apparently, it was something most vks had to do if they were out of high school age; something about getting basic education for Auradon.

The only thing that made this entire thing bearable was the visits from Uma, Gil, and his sisters. And the current person of his ‘affections’; (dunno if harshly teasing someone is affection boi) (y/n) Swann.

From day one he had been infatuated with her, from her calm demeanor to her rather spitfire backtalk when he decided to bug her. He didn’t exactly know why he had been so drawn to her but he wasn’t one to question himself or his feelings; letting himself be pulled into her energy and just be emersed.

His ‘friends’ in his classes always told him to be careful around her though; they never properly responded when he asked why. Only that she wasn’t a person to mess with like he was. ‘you’ll find out’ Jacob laughed one time after Harry bugged him about it.

What Harry didn’t know was that he was going to find out today when he went to go try out for the Auradon city R.O.A.R team. He had been getting restless and all of his friends, including Uma, had suggested joining the official team to get his energy out.

-

Now he sat in the amphitheater, getting changed into his tryout clothes and slipping on the parkour sneakers the team provided for newcomers. He grabbed the helmet and sword, walking over to his dormmates who were already part of the team. “Hey Hook,” Kevin said, holding his fist up. Harry didn’t notice a female form twitch at the greeting and look over at him through the mask, her body tensing as she did. Harry gave Kevin his fist bump and fixed his grip on the helmet. “you ready for today?” “Aye,” Harry nodded, setting down his sword and pulling on the fencing gloves “who do I gotta impress ta get on tha team?” Kevin pointed over at the female form who had tensed up earlier, her back towards Harry as she talked to a set of twins.

“the captain, she has high standards. so no half-assing this Hook, she is very skilled; the best I’ve ever seen actually.” Kevin crossed his arms and gave Harry a serious look “don’t fuck around and find out what happens on the other end of the blade.” Harry just nodded silently, Kevin was an all-around easy-going guy with a wild sense of humor, if he acted like this then Harry would listen to his warnings.

“Think (y/n) would be impressed if I defeated tha’ captain?” Harry asked, his ears flushing at the thought of (y/n) looking at him with anything other than annoyance. Kevin just facepalmed as the captain's fist cracked. “wha?”

“Nothing” Kevin sighed ‘this idiot is going to die’ he thought as everyone got into position to duel, the captain standing right in front of Harry; staring him down behind her mask. Harry felt a shiver run down his spine, and he felt like he had fucked up without even knowing it (oh boi you got no idea how much you did)

Soon the match started, the many new trainees being out within moments being against professional swordsmen, though there was a handful that showed promise; still standing even a few minutes into the battle.

Though Harry had seemed to catch the attention of the captain, her body moving about him, swords clashing with a piercing ring. Harry was keeping up through, parrying her strikes with strained ease.

The captain then got serious, spinning around and striking Harry with full force against his sword. Harry stumbled back, blocking the best he could as the captain battered him with quick attacks that were difficult to keep up with.

The other members of the team stopped to watch as Harry and the captain danced around each other, metal ringing against metal. But soon; Harry was easily outmatched and his sword flew from his grip, the blade of the captain pushing him to the floor and resting at his neck.

Harry stared up at her through his helmet, his eyes wide and mouth gaping open. He could feel the captain glaring down at him, she turned on her heel and walked towards the others. Kevin helped Harry up, brushing off his shoulders “told ya man” Kevin laughed, holding Harry’s sword as he took off his helmet “don’t fuck around and find out, and you did anyway” Harry pouted at his friend, who just laughed.

“This is why i don’t fuck with Turner” Shawn muttered, resting his arm on Harry’s shoulder. Harry looked at him with wide eyes Turner? As in like-Will Turner?

“Tur-ner?” Harry’s voice drifted out as he looked back at the captain, jaw-dropping again as (y/n)’s steeled (e/c) eyes locked with his, her nose crinkled in a glare…fuck he had pissed off his crush. “um-she?”

“(y/n) Swann-Turner, daughter of Will and Elizabeth Turner….you didn’t know? Thought that’s why you were crushing on her” Kevin laughed, picking earwax with his pinkie as Harry stared flushed at (y/n), who turned on her heel and walked out of the main room to the locker room.

“i-she…me” Harry stuttered, stumbling a bit as Kevin smacked his back.

“yep, Ms. Swann is THE Ms. Swann…you gonna back off the teasing now?” Kevin asked, quirking his brow at Harry. Who just grinned at him “imma take that as a no”

-

You huffed to yourself as you stuffed your bag into your locker, about a good month after you kicked Harry’s ass in the tryouts, he had…upped his game; was the simplest way to put it.

Though thankfully he had backed off the ‘mean’ teasing. Your things weren't going missing anymore, he left little snacks near you, carried your bag between shared classes, little shy smiles when you glanced at him. He had…changed, to say the least.

And he was fucking annoying his way into your heart, and you…couldn’t say you hated it. You always thought he was cute, but his damn behavior ticked you off enough to turn that attraction away, but now that he had backed off and was being nice? Your brain went ‘oh pretty pirate boy!’ and you told it to shut up every time you saw that mess of black hair and shining blue eyes.

“ Hello~” you glared and shut your locker, curling your lip as Aaron, son of a lost boy (you didn’t know which one, maybe the fox one?) leaned into your space with a flirtatious look “so Swann, you-me? The tourney game this weekend? And then maybe~?” he purred as he reached for your thigh, yelping as someone grabbed his neck and pulled him back.

“I know the lass can handle ‘erself but it ain't right ta treat a lady like tha’ Aaron” Harry snarled, to your surprise; he had ripped Aaron away from you and thrown him to the floor “Apologize, and I won't chop off yer pathetic excuse fer a dick” you stared at Harry in slight shock, you…hadn’t expected him to do that.

Aaron glared up at Harry but the pirate just picked him up by his collar and shook him in front of you “Apologize!” Aaron stuttered out an apology, his face paling in fear at Harry’s flashing red eyes “good, now leave ‘er alone” he dropped Aaron to his feet and the lost boy ran the other way. Harry took a deep breath and turned to look at you, his shoulders lifting a bit in sheepishness. “uh-hope tha’ didn’ offend yeh Swann?”

You just stared at him, watching as Harry started to squirm a bit under your gaze. “Hook” you started, Harry freezing in response, his eyes wide in fear/nervousness “you just earned yourself another chance with me” Harry blinked in surprise, then he grinned.

“like…a date? Kinda chance?” he asked, twiddling with his fingers as you smirked, turned to your locker, opened it, and got out a sticky note. You quickly wrote down your number and pressed the note to his chest.

“call me, and make it good” you winked and locked your locket, turning on your heel, your skirt flaring with you as you walked off, biting your lip as you heard Harry celebrate to himself behind you.

“YES!”

You laughed a bit and shook your head, fixing one of your dangling earrings and walking off to your next class. Let’s see what Harry has in store for this possible relationship eh?

-end-

(I dunno if lockers exist in college just go with it)

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[thed4rkhand]

What's a nakashtra? And those d1, d9 stuff? Haha sorry i'm not familiar with Vedic astrology and im trying to understand

Ahhaha it’s actually a great question!

So Vedic astrology was made in India by sages, and while we had the 12 signs, from Aries to Pisces, we also had these kind of sub-signs. While each sign is a full constellation, each Nakshatra is a specific star among the constellation. So each sign usually has about 3 nakshatras, but some nakshatras lie half and half between signs (like the Nakshatra mrighshira lies between Taurus and Gemini).

Each Nakshatra covers about 13’20 degrees within a sign. So a planet in 2’ in Aries will be in a different Nakshatra as compared to being in 17’ in Aries . These two nakshatras will represent different aspects of Aries, and not put everyone in Aries under one big umbrella archetype. People under one Nakshatra have more common traits, as opposed to one large sign.

Other than the sign it is in, each Nakshatra is also ruled by a different planet. For example, ardra Nakshatra, which falls in Gemini, is ruled by the north node rahu, and not mercury, the lord of Gemini. Similarly, Punarvasu and mrighshira, two other Nakshatras in Gemini, also have different planets ruling them! ( Jupiter and Mars respectively). So they may not necessarily behave like their ascendant here,and each person born in the same sign is thus still very very different.

Each Nakshatra is also associated with a hindu deity, whose story they follow. For example, people born in Ashwini Nakshatra, follow the story of Ashwini kumars, a pair of twins in Hindu mythology, that practiced medicine, healing and astrology. Thus people born under Ashwini, are said to naturally be good at such things. They also sometimes follow the story of these characters, and we can thus deduce things like what medical issues may someone under such and such Nakshatra have, or at what age will they start achieving success, or even how their family life will be.

Now further narrowing it down, each Nakshatra is divided into quadrants or padas. These padas are all about 3’ 20’ further out of the initial 13’20’ of each Nakshatra. Further each pada also has a different ruling planet, helping us differentiate the qualities even more. So even a single pada can differentiate a person’s qualities.

Lastly, the main birth chart is called the D1 chart( because it’s first and foremost). The way to see this is, if d1 is the first chart, you zoom in a bit more, you’ll see d2, if you zoom in more, you’ll see d3 and so on and so forth. Each chart here, details upon what the d1 would said. So for example, d1 says that you’ll be rich. Now you want to know how? You’ll analyse your birth chart, but you want to know more, so now, you’ll look at your d2 chart (the chart of wealth or hora chart). This chart will detail the exact way you’ll get rich, and you’ll have a much much more clear idea of things.

So this way, we have the d7 chart of children, d12 of grandparents, d10 of occupation, d9 of marriage and life after 36, and so so much more! Among these charts, d9 is given a lot of importance, as not only does it tell us about the marriage and life after marriage or second half of life, but also we can see how powerful or weak planets are in the birth chart, from this chart itself. (It’s crazy, but if a planet is said to be exalted or most powerful in the birth chart, and then it goes ans becomes debilated or really weak in d9, the planet is said to be 3 times as weak as a normal debilated planet and visa versa).

For example, moon is in Taurus in d1 chart, a sign where it is exalted. Now in d9, it’s in Scorpio, we see it’s debilitated, it’ll actually be 3 times worse. Such a person May have mental disorders or lose their mother very young, among other things. However if we just looked at d1, we would’ve said that they have a great relationship with their mother and have praiseworthy mental health.

However, the more you go up in divisional charts (they have them till like d120, where you can predict the next life and the life before), you need a more and more accurate birth time, as the chart is very very tjme sensitive and may change even with a few minutes or in the case of d120, even a few seconds are enough.

Hope I made it clear! If not, then send in a message and I’ll re-explain❤️❤️

[numbaoneflaya]

You can count on me to pull up with a thousand of questions sbdhdh. A3, A22, C5, D3, F3 for Jilly ; A18, A23, B9, C1, H2 for Nirn ; A5,B9, C8, D1, I5, for Thurwen ; A9, A13, C1, E8, and G6 for Valkya? 😏

A3, A22, C5, D3, F3 for Jilly ;

A3.Do they have any emotional or psychological conditions? Are they aware of it? Do they try to treat it?

Shawty got that stockholm syndrome in a way. She is…. Sometimes aware of it, though she wouldn't call it that any more. Maybe at first in the basement she was more aware, but now that she can come and go she thinks its a thing of the past. tries not to dwell on it. Kind of in a “well its literally not that bad its kind of fun its kind of romantic were just quirky <3” way, will get mad if someone insists she has stockholm or that the relationship is fucked. Will get enraged and upset on Vincent's behalf, probably cry and yell at you.

A22. Is your OC intended to be found generally attractive? Unattractive? Average? Is there a reason why?

I intended her to be fairly average, maybe kind of cute. It's generally the way she dresses/acts in public that draws attention, not her looks. I tend to make most of my ocs on the average scale besides a select few.

C5. Do your OC’s morals and rules of common decency go out the window when it comes to those they don’t like, or when it’s inconvenient? Aka, are their morals situational?

Good question…. Jillys morals are pretty simple- always be kind and nice, murder and hurting other people is bad, and you shouldnt lie. She sticks to those pretty strictly herself despite the situations she gets put in, often to her own detriment. But she doesn't always put a stop to those behaviors from the people she surrounds herself with, so she's sort of accomplice to bad acts of violence just by not snitching. So somewhat situational? She tries not to think about it.

D3. How comfortable are they with the idea of death?

Not comfortable! She hadn't seen a lot of it before her early twenties and was always sort of sheltered. dead fish are flushed down the toilet bcs they go to the ocean to live again, right? Thought cows and such all died of old age peacefully before they were made into burgers until she was like… twelve. 💀Won't kill mice and other critters despite her prey drive bcs she would feel too bad. And this is just for animal death, she's much more uncomfortable with human death. Also a thing she tries to ignore.

F3. Could they ever live in a “tiny home”?

God no. She hates small spaces unless she's hiding in them and tiny homes have no room for all the shit she stashes! No room for zoomies, or climbing on the furniture, or wrestling around on the floor. It would be filled with junk within a week.

A18, A23, B9, C1, H2 for Nirn ;

A18. Do they get jealous easily? Do they feel bad if they do?

He's never had much to be jealous of, as he's never really been over involved in romantic relationships. They were usually mutually beneficial and somewhat clinical in nature. Hes also pretty sure of himself and his value as an asset and lover. If he finds someone who peaks his interest and they become an item though, he might get jealous if he catches them flirting with other people. Hell be peeved at first but know flirtation in business has its value, so to make himself feel better might flirt with someone else while they are nearby. Make a game of it, see who wins.

A23. Does your OC place much importance on their appearance? Do they feel confident in it?

Appearances are crucial to him and spends a lot of time and money making sure he looks his best. He needs to appear above the rabble and impenetrable, dressing well and having immaculate posture and an air of both grace and otherworldliness.

B9. What kind of humor does your OC like the most? Slapstick, ironic, funny sounds, scare pranks, xD sO rAnDoM…

Definitely not one to find fart jokes funny. Very rarely laughs genuinely or full heartedly, he keeps all his expressions of emotion close to his chest. Sharp sardonic wit is appealing to him in the right circumstances, even a jab directed at himself can make him chuckle if it's well formed enough. Irony almost always gets him, even if its dark irony or gallows humor. Bit of a hard nut to crack. Would laugh enough that hed have to cover his mouth with his hand if he were to see Felix fall face first into mud, though. More often than not you can tell he finds something amusing by a gleam in his eyes and a slight squint.

C1. Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it?

Well he used to have a real moral code :/. Now I mean…. The ends justify the means. By any means necessary. He considers his family's needs first, then the good of the world, then any individual in the world. Has ordered executions of entire families, had babies stolen and sent away, sent armies to certain death knowing full well they would all die, commanded individuals be tortured for information, sacrificed many in what he considers to be a game of chess where he is the player and others are the pawns. He finds senseless violence and savagery to be unforgivable, but if violence has a sense and purpose to employ it, then he will do so.

H2. Is your OC a thoughtful partner, in whatever aspect of that you want to cover?

Nirn tends to be a very thoughtful and attentive person in general, just for the wrong reasons lmaoooo. But with a lover? He's going to be utilizing that to show them how much he cares and using his powers for good. Mention you like a certain fabric while shopping one time and then complain your favorite tunic has a wine stain in it several months later, he's going to be taking your measurements for a new one in your preferred material without a moment's notice. Very keen on picking up moods, expressions and tone. Also has a very good memory. He doesn't really think about it but gifts are how he shows his love. Also a great attentive listener.

A5,B9, C8, D1, I5, for Thurwen ;

A5. Are they good at handling change in their life?

I would say so, yeah. Shes been used to things constantly changing since she was little and has had little to no control on outside influences. Shes also not one to over think about the past and lament, shes more of a one foot in front of the other, the only time is the present kind of gal. Of course large changes like becoming a warden were a bit more severe, but shes mostly able to think in the present as long as she has immediate problems to deal with.

B9.What kind of humor does your OC like the most? Slapstick, ironic, funny sounds, scare pranks, xD sO rAnDoM…

Slapstick is always gonna make her laugh as long as nobody gets seriously hurt, even if its her own ass tripping into a tree. Not a fan of scare pranks, 0/10 recommend trying to scare Thurwen. You will end up with a broken nose at best and an angry elf. Likes puns, but she's the one to groan at them and try and hide the grin spreading across her face. Gallows humor but only if its her in the gallows, otherwise doesn't find it funny at all. If a little kid calls someone a fartcicle she will be tears in the eyes giggling, which is hard when your warden commander and everyone looks toward you to be serious and mature gyshsdhdfsghsd.

C8. Is your OC more practical or ideal morally? I.e., do they hold people to high expectations of behavior even if it’s not realistic for the situation, or do they have a more realistic approach and adapt their morality to be more practical?

She definitely holds herself to moral ideals and is very hard on herself, but has realistic moral expectations for others. She can understand self serving and people only wanting to survive and she will only give people a little bit of shit for it, no one's perfect. But then she expects herself to be perfect and berates herself constantly for not living up to the hero of ferelden warden commander ideals.

D1. How religious is your OC? What do they practice, if anything? If they don’t associate with any religion, what do they think of religion in general?

Atheist ever since her mom died when she was a kid, but now Shes in a weird mixed state ever since the urn of sacred ashes where shes like. fuck the maker, but Andraste is cool I guess. So respects/believes in the power of Andraste while thinking the maker is a piece of shit and the chantry sucks ass. Even she doesnt know what she really believes, but she did see the ghosts of Andrastes disciples and Shartan, used her ashes as healing salve, killed an old god, etc. So shes been in a weird place recently, crisis of faith/non faith pretty continual.

I5. Are they a good cook?

I mean…. She can cook basics. Shes been feeding herself and the alienage kids since she was old enough to walk so she knows how to get protein and make things edible. Does it taste good? Probably not. She didnt see her first spice till she was 17 years old, but she can skin a rabbit in seven seconds.

LA9, A13, C1, E8, and G6 for Valkya? 😏

A9. Does your OC make a lot of excuses? For themselves? Others?

She tries to excuse bad behavior of herself or others a lot, yeah fgdgdsfhdhs. Mostly she doesnt have to make excuses for herself because she can wholeheartedly be like “yeah i fucked up but whatever im sexy and large and awesome and everyone loves me 🙄whatever baby” and when other people fuck up shes pretty sympathetic even though they are not as large nor as sexy. Shes very used to forgiving and excusing herself its totally alien to her when she really fucks up and is suddenly like wait… valkya…. Did bad?? What is this feeling. Shame?? Guilt?? IMPOSSIBLE.

A13. Does your OC have any phobias? If so, where did they come from?

She hates those giant bugs in morrowind and valenwood a whole fucking lot but I wouldnt exactly place it as a phobia. Those huge mosquitoes and haorvers got no respect but she really hates the morrowind bugs ever since they knocked her over and jumped her while she was pants down peeing drunk as hell in the sand :/ never forgave. Never forgot.

C1. Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it?

She was raised in a healthy household that tought the basics, prety much “harming others needlessly, stealing, torture, rape, dessecrating the dead, being selfish and not doing right by others, etc etc all basic bad things” are her morals. Her morality is basically treat others how you want to be treated. And if they treat you badly, then have fun beating the shit out of them to show everyone else not to fuck with you. Its a pretty nordic morality in that way. Her morality is also since she was ‘blessed’ with being so large and strong, that she has to also look out for the little guy who cant protect themselves. So If someone treats them how valkya wouldn't want to be treated, then beat the shit out of the person harming them to show them the little guys got backup. Her parents raised her to be a hero and thats p much how she sees herself, which has its benefits and its fuckin problems.

E8. What’s one of your OC’s biggest regrets?

Fucking up Dem and Dariens relationship for sure dude :/ valkya always gonna be sulking over that one. She doesnt regret becoming a vestige, even though it would have made her so much happier not to be because it ended up saving so many people and the world. She regrets not spending more time with Naryu, regrets always having other life saving business she had to run off to, regrets not cherishing the time they had together. Regrets not telling Lyris how she feels, either. Regrets not being able to save as many people as she should have, regrets she wasnt stronger in coldharbor and didnt break out herself. But she tries not to think about it <3

G6. Do they have any favorite childhood memories?

When she was seven she once spent two months training to hold her breath underwater, because her cousin always held it longer and won the gold bet. She trained for hours almost drowning in the river until she could comfortably hold it for up to three minutes. During the next holiday when they all got together again the competitions were on and they both went under- her cousin won, holding their breath for four more minutes before they decided to come up. This was the first lesson she learned that shocked her world view- you always need to know your opponents capabilities. (after she lost 26 gold in the bets, her mother later had to inform her that her cousin was an argonian.)

[makeetelich92]

Vitamin D: Why you're in all probability NOT obtaining Enough and the way that produces You Sick

What aliment might we'd like in amounts up to twenty five times over the govt recommends for U.S. to be healthy?

What vitamin deficiency affects 70-80 p.c of the population, is nearly ne'er diagnosed and has been coupled to many cancers, high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes, depression,(i) fibromyalgia, chronic muscle pain, bone loss and autoimmune diseases like multiple sclerosis?(ii)

What vitamin is almost wholly absent from our food supply?

What vitamin is that the hidden explanation for a lot of suffering that's simple to treat? national vitamin company products

The answer to any or all of those queries is vitamin D.

Over the last fifteen years of my practice, my focus has been to discover what the body needs to function optimally. Vitamin D, a nutrient (more of a hormone and gene modulator) is a critical, essential ingredient for health and optimal function. The problem is that most of us don't have enough of it because we work and live indoors, use sun block and can't get enough from our diet--even in fortified foods.

Two recent studies in the journal Pediatrics found that 70 percent of American kids aren't getting enough vitamin D, and this puts them at higher risk of obesity, diabetes, high blood pressure and lower levels of good cholesterol. (iii) Low vitamin D levels also may increase a child's risk of developing heart disease later in life.

Overall, 7.6 million, or nine percent, of US children were vitamin-D deficient, and another 50.8 million, or 61 percent, had insufficient levels of this important vitamin in their blood.

The average blood level of vitamin D was 25 ng/dl for Caucasians and 16 ng/dl for African Americans. The optimal level is 45 ng/dl and requires about 3000-4000 IU a day of vitamin D3 -- 10 times current recommendations. If our whole population achieved a minimum level of 45 ng/dl, we would have 400,000 fewer premature deaths per year. There would be a reduction of cancer by 35 percent, type 2 diabetes by 33 percent and all causes of mortality by seven percent. (iv)

The economic burden due to vitamin D insufficiency in the United States is $40-$53 billion per year. This can be corrected for pennies a person per day.

Over the last five years, I have tested almost every patient in my practice for vitamin D deficiency, and I have been shocked by the results. What's even more amazing is what happens when my patients' vitamin D status reaches optimal levels. Having witnessed these changes, there's no doubt in my mind: vitamin D is an incredible asset to your health.

That is why in today's blog I want to explain the importance of this essential vitamin and give you six tips on how to get optimize your vitamin D levels.

Let's start by looking at the massive impact vitamin D has on the health and function of every cell and gene in your body.

How Vitamin D Regulates Your Cells and Genes

Vitamin D has a dramatic impact on the health and function of your cells. It reduces cellular growth (which promotes cancer) and improves cell differentiation (which puts cells into an anti-cancer state). That makes vitamin D one of the most potent cancer inhibitors--and explains why vitamin D deficiency has been linked to colon, prostate, breast and ovarian cancer.

But what's even more fascinating is how vitamin D regulates and controls genes.

It acts on a cellular docking station called a receptor that then sends messages to our genes. That's how vitamin D controls so many different functions--like preventing cancer, reducing inflammation, boosting mood, easing muscle aches and fibromyalgia and building bones.

Vitamin D also helps prevent the flu and colds and infections. In an observational study of Finnish soldiers, those with 25-hydroxyvitamin D levels higher than 16 ng/mL (40 nmol/L) had fewer respiratory infections than those with lower levels.(v) More recently, in a double-blind randomized controlled trial involving school girls, supplementation with 1200 IU/d of vitamin D3 during the wintertime significantly reduced influenza A infections.(vi)

These are just a few examples of the power of vitamin D. When we don't get enough it impacts every area of our biology, because it affects the way our cells and genes function. And many of us are deficient for one simple reason ...

Your body makes vitamin D when it's exposed to sunlight. In fact, 80 to 100 percent of the vitamin D we need comes from the sun. The sun exposure that makes our skin a bit red (called 1 minimum erythemal dose) produces the equivalent of 10,000 to 25,000 international units (IU) of vitamin D in our bodies.

The problem is that most of us aren't exposed to enough sunlight.

Overuse of sunscreen is one reason. While these product help protect against skin cancer--they also block a whopping 97 percent of your body's vitamin D production.

If you live in a northern climate, you're not getting enough sun (and therefore vitamin D), especially during winter. And you're probably not eating enough of the few natural dietary sources of vitamin D: fatty wild fish like mackerel, herring and cod liver oil or porcini mushrooms.

In addition, aging skin produces less vitamin D--the average 70-year-old person creates only 25 percent of the vitamin D that a 20 year-old does. Skin color makes a difference, too. People with dark skin also produce less vitamin D. And I've seen very severe deficiencies in Orthodox Jews and Muslims who keep themselves covered all the time.

With all these causes of vitamin D deficiency, you can see why supplementing with enough of this vitamin is so important. Unfortunately, you aren't really being told the right amount of vitamin D to take.

The government recommends 200 to 600 IU of vitamin a day. This is the amount you need to prevent rickets, a disease caused by vitamin D deficiency. But the real question is: How much vitamin D do we need for OPTIMAL health? How much do we need to prevent autoimmune diseases, high blood pressure, fibromyalgia, chronic muscle pain,(vii) depression, osteoporosis and even cancer?

The answer is: Much more than you think.

Recent research by vitamin D pioneer Dr. Michael Holick, Professor of Medicine, Physiology, and Dermatology at Boston University School of Medicine, recommends intakes of up to 2,000 IU a day -- or enough to keep blood levels of 25 hydroxy vitamin D at between 75 to 125 nmol/L (nanomoles per liter).(viii) That may sound high, but it's still safe: Lifeguards have levels of 250 nmol/L without toxicity.

Our government currently recommends 2,000 IU as the upper limit for vitamin D -- but even that may not be high enough for our sun-deprived population! In countries where sun exposure provides the equivalent of 10,000 IU a day and people have vitamin D blood levels of 105 to 163 nmol/L, autoimmune diseases (like multiple sclerosis, type 1 diabetes, inflammatory bowel disease, rheumatoid arthritis and lupus) are uncommon.

Don't be scared that amounts that high are toxic: One study of healthy young men receiving 10,000 IU of vitamin D for 20 weeks showed no toxicity.(ix)

You might have seen a recent study in the Journal of the American Medical Association that shows that a single high dose of 500,000 Units of vitamin D3 (one year's worth of vitamin D) increased the risk of falls and fractures in elderly woman.(x) Does this mean that vitamin D doesn't prevent fractures or falls? Absolutely not!

The design and logic of the study were completely wrong. As a friend once said, "The well meaning are often ill doing."

Imagine a study that gave people a year's worth of vitamin A, or iron (both are nutrients that are stored in the body like vitamin D) in one dose. The vitamin A would cause immediate liver failure and death. In fact, the way the Inuit used to kill explorers in the Arctic was to feed them polar bear liver, which gave them toxic doses of vitamin A. A year's worth of iron in one dose would cause severe intestinal problems and iron poisoning.

Biologically we understand why a single high dose of vitamin D may cause problems. A single high dose induces protective mechanisms that reduce the available vitamin D by increasing the activity of enzymes that cause the vitamin D to be broken down by the body. (xi) The body requires a balance of the right nutrients at the right dose at the right time. No one would eat a year's worth of anything in one day and expect it to be healthy.

The question that remains is: How can you get the right amounts of vitamin D for you?

6 Tips for Getting the Right Amount of Vitamin D

Unless you're spending all your time at the beach, eating 30 ounces of wild salmon a day, or downing 10 tablespoons of cod liver oil a day, supplementing with vitamin D is essential. The exact amount needed to get your blood levels to the optimal range (100 to160 nmol/L) will vary depending on your age, how far north you live, how much time you spend in the sun and even the time of the year. But once you reach optimal levels, you'll be amazed at the results.

For example, one study found that vitamin D supplementation could reduce the risk of getting type 1 diabetes by 80 percent.(xii) In the Nurses' Health Study (a study of more than 130,000 nurses over 3 decades), vitamin D supplementation reduced the risk of multiple sclerosis by 40 percent.(xiii),(xiv)

I've seen many patients with chronic muscle aches and pains and fibromyalgia who are vitamin D deficient--a phenomenon that's been documented in studies. Their symptoms improve when they are treated with vitamin D. A Danish study of Arabic women with fibromyalgia found significant vitamin D deficiency and recovery with replacement of vitamin D.(xv)

Finally, vitamin D has been shown to help prevent and treat osteoporosis. In fact, it's even more important than calcium. That's because your body needs vitamin D to be able to properly absorb calcium. Without adequate levels of vitamin D, the intestine absorbs only 10 to 15 percent of dietary calcium. Research shows that the bone-protective benefits of vitamin D keep increasing with the dose.

So here is my advice for getting optimal levels of vitamin D:

1. Get tested for 25 OH vitamin D. The current ranges for "normal" are 25 to 137 nmol/L or 10 to 55 ng/ml. These are fine if you want to prevent rickets -- but NOT for optimal health. In that case, the range should be 100 to 160 nmol/L or 40 to 65 ng/ml. In the future, we may raise this "optimal" level even higher.

2. Take the right type of vitamin D. The only active form of vitamin D is vitamin D3 (cholecalciferol). Look for this type. Many vitamins and prescriptions of vitamin D have vitamin D2 -- which is not biologically active.

3. Take the right amount of vitamin D. If you have a deficiency, you should correct it with 5,000 to 10,000 IU of vitamin D3 a day for three months--but only under a doctor's supervision. For maintenance, take 2,000 to 4,000 IU a day of vitamin D3. Some people may need higher doses over the long run to maintain optimal levels because of differences in vitamin D receptors, living in northern latitudes, indoor living, or skin color.

4. Monitor your vitamin D status until you are in the optimal range. If you are taking high doses (10,000 IU a day) your doctor must also check your calcium, phosphorous and parathyroid hormone levels every three months.

5. Remember that it takes up to 6 to 10 months to "fill up the tank" for vitamin D if you're deficient. Once this occurs, you can lower the dose to the maintenance dose of 2,000 to four,000 Units a day.

6. attempt to eat dietary thereforeurces of aliment D. These include:

• Fish liver oils, love cod liver oil. one TBSP (15 ml) = 1,360 IU of vitamin D• sauteed wild salmon. 3.5 oz = 360 IU of vitamin D• sauteed mackerel. 3.5 oz = 345 IU of vitamin D• Sardines, willned in oil, drained. 1.75 oz = 250 IU of vitamin D• One whole egg = twenty IU of vitamin D• Porcini mushrooms 4 ounces = four hundred IU of vitamin D

You can see currently why I feel so turbulently regarding vitamin D. This vitamin is crucial for good health. therefore begin aiming for optimum levels--and watch however your health improves.

[thatapplelookslikeme]

DEARDESCENDANTS’ 12 DAYS OF HOLIDAYS

Day 2: Snow

Warnings: panic/anxiety attacks, ocd, child abuse, emotional trauma, thoughts of self-harm/suicide

Word count: 3,592

basically: based after d3 when the barrier is broken, but there’s a spell that keeps the villains from leaving. evie misses the snow on the isle and wants to go visit, carlos has lots of AnXiEtY, jay is protective of his boy, jaylos

Remember that panic and anxiety attacks are different for everybody! The ones described in this are the most common for me, so they’re easier to write about, but they’re definitely not something that everybody goes through.

no promises that i’m gonna finish the whole 12 days because i did no preparing for this at all and both of these days took h o u r s to finish. i’m trying im sry :(

Evie, Mal and Jay sat on the floor of the boys’ room looking at old pictures. This was their first holiday season in Auradon and as much as she enjoyed the warm weather, Evie was starting to miss the cold weather and snow of the isle. The three of them were going through the polaroids they took last year, only a couple months before they were whisked away to Auradon.

“Do you guys ever miss the snow?” Evie asked, not sure how to bring up the idea of a visit.

“No, it’s way better here,” Mal responded to her, “I actually enjoy being able to feel my limbs when I walk outside.”

“Don’t you dare say you want to go back, E,” Carlos said from across the room. “That place is full of bad memories. Go buy a snow globe to stare at if you miss it so much.”

“I don’t think one day would be so bad,” Evie responds as she continues looking through pictures. “It wouldn’t even have to be the whole day, maybe just a couple hours.” Mal and Jay exchange looks, but nobody responds, clearly not wanting to start an argument.

They finish going through the pictures and when Mal goes to bring another box of pictures over, Jay glances at his boyfriend, still sitting on the bed, staring at the book in his lap. He stands up, walking over to Carlos and sitting down next to him on the bed. When he doesn’t say anything, Jay leans his head on his shoulder. Knowing that shutting down like this was one of Carlos’ coping mechanisms, he didn’t say anything. He knew all he needed to do was be there to comfort him during times like this.

Acting as if this wasn’t happening was the best way to help Carlos get through this. Bringing attention to his attacks would only make them worse, Carlos never liked being the center of attention anyway. To anybody else, Carlos would look completely okay. But Jay knew, because he’s been around him for so many years, he knew the fidgeting and the blank staring. Jay knew to be there just in case he needed anything, but gave him time to process everything in his mind. When he was ready to talk, he would. And if he needed help, he would say it.

The first time Jay witnessed one of these attacks, he made Carlos promise to let him know if it was getting to the point of needing help. In exchange, Jay promised not to pressure him to talk about anything unless he wanted to.

Eventually, the girls finished going through all the pictures and headed back to their own room after saying their goodbyes. Jay stayed sitting next to Carlos, reading along with him when he calmed down enough to continue reading. After awhile, Carlos silently put his book down on his night stand and laid down. Jay laid down next to him and held him close to his chest, knowing that he wasn’t going to get any conversation from Carlos tonight.

~

“If you’re not going to put the work in to keep this house clean, you don’t deserve to stay in it! Stay away from me and this house until you realize how much I do for you and are ready to appreciate it,” Cruella yelled as she slammed the door in the small boy’s face.

It was the middle of winter, and there were piles of snow and ice all over the ground already with more falling. It was the middle of the night, which made it even colder. He could stay in his treehouse, he kept a couple blankets up there, but there were still openings all over the place and he’d probably be soaked and freezing by morning. He could try to sneak back in the house through the window and sneak back out in the morning, but he’d make too much noise, and he couldn’t be sure Cruella wouldn’t come into the closet before he woke up.

Deciding he didn’t have any other options, he started making his way to the clubhouse. He knew Mal, Evie, and Jay wouldn’t care if he stayed there, but he knew they’d ask about why he had come if any of them found him there. Everybody on the isle had shitty parents, and it was some part of a social contract that nobody talked about it. He covered his bruises and cigarette burns pretty well, and when he didn’t and one of the others asked about it, he would just brush it off as injuries from a fight.

He let himself in and looked around for any of the other three. When he didn’t see any of them, he mentally prepared an explanation for if one of them came in and found him. As soon as he pulled the blankets over his body and curled up on the couch, he was asleep.

The next morning when Jay found him, Carlos completely forgot about his bullshit explanation from last night and spilled every detail of his fucked up childhood, and Jay shared every detail of his in return.

~

Carlos woke up sweating and turned over, expecting to see his boyfriend lying on the other side of the bed, but was surprised to find the other side of the bed completely empty. In fact, once he took a look around the room, he realized the entire room was empty.

Had Jay finally gotten tired of having to comfort him everyday for so many years?

Carlos felt his breathing quicken and a familiar heavy feeling in his chest started to appear. Pulling the blankets off the bed and rushing to the bathroom, he slammed the door shut behind him and curled up in the corner.

He wasn’t prepared for Jay to tell him he was tired and done with him, so he figured the best way to avoid that was to block out the world. After all, the best way to cope is to act like it’s not happening. Well, out of the coping mechanisms Carlos knew, which were few, and they were all unhealthy.

Jay opened up the door with his right hand and balanced the tray of food on his left hand. He looked over to the bed and noticed that Carlos wasn’t there anymore. He also noticed the blankets were gone from the bed, but brushed it off assuming Carlos just kicked them to the floor. It wasn’t uncommon for their room to be a complete mess, especially their beds. Jay assumes Carlos is just getting ready, so he sets the tray down on the table in front of the TV and calls out, “Hey, I got you breakfast whenever you’re ready,” before turning on the TV and sitting down on the couch.

Carlos was so inside his own head that he didn’t even hear the noise of the door opening and closing, Jay’s voice, or the TV turning on. All he could hear was the voice in his head telling him that Jay was tired of him and he was going to leave him.

After a half hour of waiting, Jay starts to worry about Carlos. He never takes this long to get ready, even including a shower, and the shower hadn’t been on at all since Jay returned to the room. He gets up to go check on Carlos, knocking on the door and attempting to twist the handle. That’s when he realizes there’s no light coming from under the door. Which meant Carlos was in there in the dark. Sitting in the dark was something Carlos only did when his attacks were really bad. Something he did when he needed to block out every other thing in the world.

He tried knocking one more time and when he didn’t get a response, he got the key that was taped behind the TV stand. They kept it there in case Carlos ever needed help. It wasn’t uncommon for him to start panicking during a shower, there was plenty of time to think in there. But it never got bad enough for Jay to have to use it. There’s a first time for everything, he supposes.

He pushed open the door and flipped on the light switch. He immediately fell to his knees in front of the boy when he saw him curled up in his blankets, crying and shaking. He thought about pulling the smaller boy up and carrying him back to his bed, but decided that trying to touch him would scare him and that’s the last thing he wanted to do. “Carlos? What’s going on?” He waited for a response but knew that he was too far gone to hear him.

Carlos didn’t notice the noise or the light, his brain was still trying to process the fact that one of the most important people in his life hated him and never wanted to see him again. He’d be better off without him, Carlos knew, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. And if Jay left, chances are Mal and Evie would too. That’s his family, what was he going to do without him. He’d be left alone. And what’s the point of living when you’re alone?

His irrational thoughts and lowered impulse control decided that the best solution to keep everybody happy was to end it all now. Nobody would have to worry about him anymore, and he wouldn’t have to feel like a burden or be left alone. It seemed like a win-win situation to him.

He sat frozen for a couple minutes, which felt like six hours to him, trying to find the strength within himself to reach over under the sink where he kept his box of razors. Once he finally started to move, he was met with something pushing his arm back. Too afraid to open his eyes and discover what was stopping him, he pulled his hand back and ignored it, hoping if he did then it would go away. When he tried to reach out again, he was met with the same force. Not wanting to open his eyes, because opening his eyes meant accepting reality, he tried to feel for whatever was in front of him. When he felt something warm he pulled his hand back as quick as he could and hid it under the blanket with the rest of his body.

“What are you reaching for? Let me help you, just tell me what I can do for you.” Carlos flinched when he heard the familiar voice so close to him. He tried to back away from it, but his back was already against the wall. He knew he was in this room alone, he had to be. He checked behind the shower curtain and under the sink before he locked, then unlocked, then locked, then unlocked, then locked the door. Even in this state, that annoying part of his brain that makes him do such ridiculous things still wouldn’t leave him alone.

He was alone, he was sure of that. Which meant his brain was making this up. He’s been in this situation before. He was sure that if he opened his eyes right now, his boyfriend would not be in front of him. He knew exactly who would be there instead, and he couldn’t handle seeing her right now.

If he could just reach under the fucking sink, this would all be over. “Carlos! Can you hear me? I know you want me to leave you alone when you’re like this, but I’m worried about you.” Jay tried to reach out to touch the younger boy but instantly regretted it when all the strength in the younger boy was being used to kick and scream back at him.

“You can’t be here! Leave me alone!” Carlos went from angry to crying in a matter of seconds, “Please don’t hurt me.” His voice was so small and scared and all Jay wanted to do was hug him and absorb all the sadness and hurt in him. He wanted to take it all away, even if it meant he had to feel it himself. But that wasn’t possible and he knew that, so he needed to focus on getting Carlos out of his head and back into the real world.

“Carlos, nobody is going to hurt you. Please just open your eyes. It’s Jay, I’m the only person here and you know I would never hurt you.” Jay reached out to touch his hand and when the other boy didn’t put up a fight, he pulled him into his lap and held him as tight as he could. He didn’t know how long they stayed like that, but it was long enough for the younger boy’s breathing to slow down and his tears to dry. Once he was sure Carlos was fast asleep, Jay carried him back to his own bed. Once the boy was lying down, he made a second trip back to the bathroom to retrieve the blankets that still lie on the bathroom floor. Bringing them back, he covered the boy with them, careful not to wake him up.

~

Carlos woke up with a headache, not remembering anything after Mal and Evie left last night. Looking out the window, he was surprised to see the world so bright. Was it afternoon already? Did he really sleep half the day away? He sighed and stretched his body, the sooner he got some ibuprofen in his system, the sooner the pain in his head would go away. When he went to stand, he was stopped by a pair of strong arms pulling him back.

He twisted his body around so that he was face to face with his boyfriend. But something was off… were those tear stains? Had Jay been crying? There was no way, Jay almost never cried.

Jay was awoken by the movement. Groaning he opened his eyes, not ready for the bright light he was met with. Once he saw Carlos was awake too, he immediately switched back into caretaker mode. “Are you okay?” Carlos asked him, looking worried. Why did he look so worried? Jay’s the one that should be worried! Was Jay doing something wrong? Oh no, he couldn’t let this happen, he had to fix this.

“I’m fine, why would you ask that?” Before Carlos had time to answer he had dozens more questions being shot at him, “Do you need anything? How long have you been awake? Did you eat yet?”

“Jay, what’s up with you?” Carlos asked as he watched his boyfriend stand up out of bed and start pacing around the room.

“So… you’re fine?” he asked pausing at the foot of the bed.

“Yeah?” It came out as more of a question that a definitive answer. “I mean, my head hurts pretty bad but that’s probably because you let me sleep all day.” Then he stood up and made his way to get some ibuprofen.

Jay stared at the empty bed for a moment, trying to decide if he should be worried about Carlos acting so normal after one of the worst attacks he’s seen him have. When he came to the conclusion that he probably didn’t remember any of the events from earlier that day, which wouldn’t be the first time he forgot one of his attacks, he decided it was best to not mention it. Making Carlos relive that wouldn’t be good on him, and it would probably freak him out that he had forgotten such a long period of time.

~

“Evie wants to go back to the isle.” Both of the boys laughed at Mal’s statement. “I’m serious!” She said, annoyed that they thought she was joking. “It was all she could talk about last night when we got back to our room. She misses the weather, which is insane, because who would want to be cold? Ayway, I’m not gonna let her go back alone and I don’t think any of us are gonna be able to stop her.”

“We all agreed not to go back there before the barrier was taken down,” Carlos siad, barely above a whisper. When Jay and Mal looked over to him, surprised that he would get involved when he usually avoided conflicts at all costs, he looked to the ground to avoid meeting their eyes.

“It’s not like we’re moving back there, she just wants to go back for a little bit, do a little bit of sightseeing, and come back.”

“What ‘sights’ are there to see? Everything’s broken down and gross, nothing any of us didn’t spend most of lives looking at,” Jay shot back. “Have you thought about what would happen if either of your parents found out you were there?”

“I’m not stupid, Jay! We’ll be careful. And even if they did find out, I know how to fight for myself! I’m not as weak as you think I am.”

“You’re acting like going back to the place that traumatized you is a casual after school activity! You don’t want to go back there anymore than we do, you just want to make her happy. Stop down playing it and tell her no!” Jay said, raising his voice.

“Can you two please stop fighting!” It came out as more of a demand than a question, and that shocked the other two. Carlos never raised his voice like this. Jay knew something was going on with him but he didn’t have time to worry about that right now. Right now, he needed to worry about stopping his friends from putting themselves in danger.

Deciding to deal with Carlos later, he turned his attention back to Mal. “You two are not going over there alone! You want to go? Fine. But I’m coming with you. Whether you like it or not.”

Mal stormed out of the room and Jay took a couple deep breaths before turning around to find Carlos with his hands over his ears and his head between his knees. “‘Los? Are you okay?” He walked over and reached out to touch his shoulder.

“I don’t want you to go. Mal and Evie too. All of you. I want you to stay here.” Carlos raised his head up to reveal the tears running down his face.

Jay had enough of this, he’s seen too much crying from the younger boy in the past 24 hours. He needs to fix this. He sat down next to the boy and wrapped his arms around his shoulders. “I can’t let them know go alone, you know that. I don’t think the two most stubborn people we know are going to change their minds.”

“Maybe they won’t, but if you all go and something happens, I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself.”

~

“Promise me you’ll like me know if it’s too much,” Jay said, shutting the back door of the car after Evie got in.

“Yes, I promise. Can we go now? I kind of want to get this over with as soon as possible,” Carlos said getting into the passenger’s side of the car.

Jay got into the driver’s seat, giving one last smile to his boyfriend before turning his attention to the road. The four of them rode in silence across the bridge and waited until the car was parked. Mal and Evie were the first to get out, promising to call if they needed help before running off.

Jay sat waiting for Carlos to make e move to get out of the car. After a couple minutes Jay looked over to find Carlos fidgeting with his fingers. “We can just wait in the car, we don’t have to get out if you don’t want to.” Carlos smiled to himself and nodded, still looking down at his fingers.

They sat in comfortable silence waiting for any sign that the girls were in trouble. Jay turned on the radio leaning his head back against the headrest while humming to himself. When he opened his eyes again, he noticed the piles of snow sitting around the parking lot.

He smiled over at his boyfriend, remembering all the snowball fights they used to have, and chasing each other in the snow after long days. He missed all the good times they used to have together in the snow. “Come on,” he said, opening his door.

“Hm?” Carlos responded, looking over.

“Get out, we’re not gonna sit here and be miserable the whole time.” He stood up and poked his head back in. “I’m serious, let’s go.” He shut the door, grabbing some snow and throwing it over the car as Carlos got out, just missing his head.

“Oh, you’re on,” Carlos said ducking down and picking up some snow before running around the car and attacking the older boy with snowballs.

The spent the next 30 minutes running around the parking lot trying to hit each other with snowballs. When he noticed Carlos starting to get cold and tired, he pulled the blanket he kept in the back seat out and wrapped it around the younger boy’s shoulders. Carlos smiled up at him as a silent ‘thank you’.

If Jay wasn’t so focused on not being able to feel his fingers, he could get lost in the boy’s eyes. Jay wrapped his arms around his shoulders and pushed him back against the car, leaning down to kiss him. When they pulled away, Carlos smiled again. “I love you, Jay, but it’s freezing. Can we wait in the car?”

[ldrmas]

Imperfect Perfectly Pt. 8

Story set after D3, we got a wedding, friends and adventures. More so I just wanted Hades and Mal as father and daughter. Let’s see how this goes. To find other parts of the story search “imperfect perfectly” on my page. The “~” are flash back scenes. Chapter 8 setting: Isle of the Lost and Hades Lair

“Your turn.” Mal whispered once she finally pulled away from her father and looked up at him. “My turn, huh?” Hades chuckled but nodded as he agreed. His daughter spilled out her heart it was time that he did the same. “Well it started out that I was able to visit ya whenever I wanted to after you were born.” He started as he fell back in time to when his kid was just a squirt. ~ “I told ya not to show up randomly.” Maleficent spat as Hades walked in from the hidden entrance to her lair. Hades rolled his eyes as he walked right by his ex and picked up his daughter from her bassinet. He rocked Mal a couple of times before finally turning back to the old fairy. “You also didn’t give me a way to tell you I am coming so this is me telling you I’m coming over.” Hades bite back and hid his smirk as Maleficent huffed out before walked away. The less he had to see of her the better. He was only here to see one person and that was the little one in his arms. As time went on, he kept coming over, and he made an effort to be with Mal as much as he could. He knew that Maleficent would allow for only so long so he took what he could while he could. It was just after Mal had turned one years old that the day had come. “No, no more. Get out!” Maleficent screeched at the unpowerful god with a deathly glare. “You let me see her, now!” Hades growled as he stood toe to toe with the powered down fairy. “No! She’s starting to remember things. I will not have her repeating your name ever! No one is going to find out you’re her father! Now get out of my lair!” “Just let me see her once more!” “You take one more step and I’ll destroy her!” Maleficent warned and Hades froze where he stood. He wanted so badly to disobey, to run to his daughter anyway, but he knew the witch would keep her word. Even without magic she still had the power to kill Mal and Hades wouldn’t be able to save his daughter. He wanted to fight so much but for now Maleficent held all the cards. “If I leave right now, promise me you’ll keep her alive.” Hades negotiated as he backed away towards the door. “You keep paying me and I’ll keep my end of the deal.” The purple fairy smirked as she watched Hades surrender and suffer. “You’ll get your money, but I mean it Maleficent! You harm her in any way and I find out about it, not only will you no longer get a cent from me but I will come here and burn this place to the ground. I don’t need my powers to roast you alive.” Hades warned in finality before leaving the lair, with only his ex’s evil laughter echoing in his ears. He did find ways to make sure the evil fairy kept her word. He had his isle kids rotate on watching Maleficent’s lair always on the look out for his daughter. He also had been able to corner one of the purple ruler’s knuckleheads and made him double agent. He would be on the inside and report back to Hades anything important about his daughter also how Maleficent was treating her. When Mal had snuck out for the first time right after she learned how to walk, he had been so surprised that he was able to see her that he didn’t think of anything else. He had ran to the square where Mal was and it took two of his isle kids to stop him before he ran all the to his little girl. She was so small. That’s all he could think of when he first laid his eyes on her after all this time. It made him chuckle. He thought back to his kid days, even though he had been the older of Zeus and Poseidon, he was smaller than them both when they were young. It was why they always picked on him. His isle kids were protecting the square and Philo was going to daughter to try to get her back inside. He wanted nothing more than to pick her up himself but if Mal recognized him or talked about him to Maleficent at all than the evil fairy would take all of her anger out on Mal. He couldn’t risk that. He couldn’t risk his baby’s safety just because he wanted to be selfish for a minute. Then Brutus came out and his daughter was back in his non-wife’s clutches. Philo needed patching up but it he would be alright. And once again Mal was somewhere he couldn’t reach. ~ “I kept an eye on you, either by my isle kids or I saw you myself, ‘til around you kicked Uma in the sandbox. After that you were starting your own gang and I figured that they would figure out you were being followed so I told my Islers to back off. I still asked them about you, but I couldn’t risk seeing you anymore.” Hades said as he sighed and fell back into the present. It was sad. He should have tried to fight Maleficent more but being on the island had made him weak, made him a coward. “I was always so scared that if your mother ever found out what I was doing she really would hurt you. She hurt me so deeply that I couldn’t even begin to think of the ways she could hurt you. I’m sorry, I’m sorry I didn’t fight harder for you.” Hades sighed but went silent as Mal rose from the throne and stepped away. “Mal?” He asked as he rose up and followed her, touching her shoulder gently. Mal took a second longer before turning back to the under-world lord, tears falling down her cheeks. “The only way she hurt me, was keeping me away from you.” Mal chocked as more tears fell and she shivered with sobs. Hades didn’t say anything further just pulled his daughter to him and covered her in a hug. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Mal cried repeatedly as she didn’t fight the hug. She leaned deeply into it and frankly didn’t want to let go. “It’s okay, Kido. It’s going to be okay now. I’ve got ya.” Hades replied as he stroked his baby girl’s hair. He did have his daughter now. He was going to be there for her and this time he would fight any one who would try to take this away from him. Ending...to be continued My story is highly inspired by @otpsilove90 and @love-bucky-3000 so please go check out their Descendants stories. Thank you all for the understanding on the lateness of this chapter, I got caught up with the weekend and ran into a small writers block. Thank you for all the ideas as well, please leave a comment if you wanna see something within the story. I’m probably going to write maybe two more chapters and then we’ll do a jump cut to the wedding. Let’s see how this goes. I really don’t know what to do after this chapter because this and the last one where the main things I wanted to write. Please be understanding if the next parts take longer.  Thanks again and let’s see where this goes. 

[edream93]

Strong and True - Descendants Witch AU

Posting this here because I’m still not sure if I’ll actually make this into a full story. Basically, I was inspired by the last part of “Night Falls” in D3 where it looked like Uma, Mal, and Evie were doing some witchy/siren singing and some how I got to this idea of them being in a coven together. Not fully fleshed out like I would want it to be but let me know what you think.

Outside, grey storm clouds tinged with green rolled thickly across the skies, ominous...but only to those who didn’t understand the change a storm could bring.

Below the storm was a fairly large cottage, designed to look like a mini castle. Thick vines had crept along its sides, covering most of the solarium and the front of the cottage during its long abandonment. No one had lived in the cottage for a very long time until the old and almost faded “For Sale” sign disappeared a few days earlier, followed by three young women entering it on such a grey and stormy day.

Evie twirled into the room, arms extended and a bright smile on her beautiful face. “Isn’t this room just perfect?” she squealed.

“Uh...” Uma gazed around the room. Perfect was not necessarily the word she would use. 

Decrepit. 

Hazardous. 

One-sneeze-away-from-being-gone-with-the-wind were what had immediately come to mind when stepping foot into the dusty old sun room. 

Perhaps at one point in time the room had been dazzling, the gem of this cottage, with its high slanted glass windows that looked out into the surrounding forest and would heighten any moonlit night that graced the room. Now though, it just looked like the shitty realtor that Evie had demanded they work with had made easy fools of them and sold them a fixer upper that would be easier to tear down and build a new than to actually fix.

Most of their combined saved money was gone and the damn roof was going to fall on their heads. “Perfect” was the exact opposite of what this place was.

“It’s perfect, E.”

Snapping her head towards the other occupant in the room, Uma glared but only received a roll of bored green eyes just as Evie squealed and clapped her hands, already gliding across and out of the room in that way that only Evie could in heels over a floor covered in decades worth of debris and dirty as she went off to explore the other rooms. 

“Mal,” Uma spun towards the other girl, teal braids whipping the air forcefully. “You can’t seriously expect us to live here! I’m sure even the termites are too offended by how crappy this place is to live here. Even the cobwebs have cobwebs!” 

The purple haired girl across from her sniffed dismissively. “When did our kind ever have issues with cobwebs? Look,” she said, holding up a hand to cut off Uma. “Evie foresaw this. This move. This house. It’s where we’re supposed to be.”

“Oh right,” Uma laughed sarcastically, with a flick of teal braids over her shoulder. “Like Evie has never mis-foretold something. Don’t you remember that time she told you going blonde was going to make your face friendlier looking? Well she was wrong about that.”

Mal glared, jaw tense. She was silent for a few minutes before growling out, “She used her mirror.”

Shifting her weight from one hip to the other, Uma pinched the bridge of her nose in exasperation, counting briefly down from ten but still feeling her blood continue to boil. “I thought,” she said slowly, “I thought she was only going to use that damn mirror for important situations.”

“Finding a base for our coven is an important situation,” Mal defended. “What good is a coven without a foundation? Without roots? If we want this to work, if we ever want to be out of our mothers’ shadows, we all have to make some sacrifices at some point! This ain’t some kiddy sandbox! That’s how the big witches play the game if you didn’t know, Shrimpy!”

Brown eyes became enraged at the cruel childhood nickname. “Oh I know exactly how this game is played but we won’t be much of a coven if one of the founders has her heart erode away and turn into a withered old hag before we even get started, Dragon Breath!”

“You know Evie hates it when you refer to her as a withered old had, even in the hypothetical sense,” Carlos sighed leaning against the doorframe. 

Mal’s eyes flicked briefly towards his direction before focusing once again on Uma. Carlos rolled his eyes when he saw how the purple haired girl’s eyes flash an angry green. 

“You know, if you have a problem with the way I run my coven-”

“Your coven?” Uma sputtered?. “ It’s our coven!” Uma growled, the air around her filling with static. 

“Here we go again,” Carlos huffed annoyed, pushing himself off the door frame and out of the room. He left behind the all too familiar fight between the two polar opposite girls and headed up the musty carpeted grand staircase, soon following the sound of Evie’s humming.

He walked into one of the rooms just as Evie opened the room’s balcony door. The rain had stopped, leaving everything covered in a misty blanket that aired out the musty room.

“Mal and Uma are at it again,” Carlos shared, following her out onto the balcony and sitting on the rusted rails with ease. 

“That’s nothing new,” Evie, frowned down at the same railing. After some calculations and some tentative poking, she decided that it was best not to test her weight on it. “They’ll probably throw some hexes at each other until they get it out of their systems like usual and then we could actually start getting this place into shape.”

“The air always smells weird after their fights,” Carlos’s nose wrinkled as he pouted.

Evie frowned, looking up from where she was inspecting one of the hinges of the balcony’s doors. “There’s a smell?”

Carlos nodded, smoothly leaning back on the railing with one foot propped up and the other dangling off the side, hands tucked beneath his head. A piece of his white-black hair fell across his forehead and Evie had the urge to move it to the side but she kept her hands clasped delicately in front of her, just like her mother taught her. Besides, Carlos didn’t really like it when she reached out towards him, especially for something so trivial.

“Well yeah. I mean, there’s a smell when you do your spells too but you’re all...different? Like I think it’s a combination of the spell itself and the emotion behind it. When Mal and Uma fight it’s...it’s like the smell of a forest fire burning up a storm? Or maybe it’s a storm drowning out a forest fire?” He frowned thoughtfully, an expression he often made when he was trying to work out a difficult problem. “Like I know that doesn’t make sense but that’s what it reminds me of.”

Evie cautiously stepped closer to him as if approaching an easily startled animal. “And that’s all?” she asked hesitatingly. Do you smell anything else?”

He closed his eyes. “Just when you use your magic, it usually smells like home,” he smiled softly before his eyes flew open and he sat up quickly on the railing, legs straddling the side. “I mean, not my home b-but like, you know, what a home should be. Warm? Safe?”

“That’s nice to know,” Evie smiled warmly, placing her hand lightly on the railing next to him. Carlos looked down at her hand, an unreadable look on his face before slowly reaching out and placing his over hers...only for it to go through it.

“Carlos…” Evie whispered.

He stared at where his hand was currently going through the railing before sighing. He jumped to his feet, hovering in the air slightly before he willed his corporeal form to at least appear like it was standing on the balcony again. 

“I guess I should do my job as the coven’s ghost guard dog and make sure there isn’t any ghouls or goblins hiding in the closets. Don’t want anything to ruin your beauty sleep,” he grinned. It didn’t quite reach his eyes. 

Evie nodded. And then he was gone, like smoke in the air, leaving Evie to cradle a slightly chilled hand to her chest.

Nearby the cottage, on an overlooking hill, a tall figure stood from a kneeled position. 

“Don’t taste anything bad in the air.”

“Well they’d be an ambitious lot if they started making trouble their first day, Gil,” another figure leaning against a nearby tree answered disinterestedly, a brass spyglass dangling from their fingers.  

Gil thought on that before nodding. “Except for those trolls.”

“Gnomes,” his companion corrected. “They were garden gnomes. And they only stirred up trouble because someone instigated ‘em.”

“Oh, right,” Gil pouted. “Sorry, Harry.”

Sighing, Harry pushed off from the tree and clapped a firm hand on Gil’s shoulder. “No use crying over the past, Gilly. We need to focus on the present. And do you know what exactly in the present we need to be keeping our eyes on?”

“The...witches?” Gil guessed. “To make sure they won’t cause any problems?”

Harry grinned, revealing all sharp pointy teeth and fae-like wild glee. “Exactly.”

[fangsandforests]

Is a Crested Gecko the Right Pet for You?

A while back I did a post like this for tarantulas, where I went over some of the pros and cons of keeping tarantulas as pets. This time, the spotlight is on crested geckos. (I’ll do one for leopard geckos and cave geckos at a later date.) 

If you’ve ever seen these cute little guys sleeping on a fake plant in a pet store and wondered what it’s like to have one as a pet, I can honestly say they are one of the absolute best pet reptiles you can get. But in my usual fashion, I’m going to deliver the bad news first.

They are messy

If you’re used to something like a leopard gecko, which pretty much chooses one spot to go to the bathroom and makes cleaning super easy for you, then you might not like having a crested gecko. 

Crested geckos are great candidates for bioactive setups, and it has a lot to do with how much they “food” they provide for the cleanup crew (springtails, isopods, etc.). But even with a bioactive enclosure, you’ll need to regularly clean the tank walls and water dishes. 

That’s because when they poop, it’s typically down the sides of the walls, in a water dish, on the leaves of plants, or other places that are sure to leave an ugly blemish on your lovely setup. And that’s not all. Don’t be surprised if your gecko religiously steps in its food and tracks it all over the walls and decor. 

But wait, it gets better. . . . If you love handling your reptiles, you’ll be delighted to know that crested geckos are notorious for pooping on your hand when you first pick them up. (Your hand is warm, and that warmth always seems to prompt them to clear out their bowels.)

But, hey, if you can’t deal with poop and food messes and don’t know the procedures for preventing Salmonella, I hear some invertebrates make great pets. :)

They jump

This is another one for those of you who want a pet that’s easy to handle. While crested geckos are some of the most docile reptiles, they can (and will) jump. They’re arboreal creatures, and that’s just what they do. So the hand-walking technique is really more of a hand-jumping technique with these guys. 

Considering how calm these guys tend to be as adults, I don’t necessarily consider the jumping a big con here. Once your get used to their body language, you can tell when a crested gecko is about to take a leap of faith. And you have a split second to make sure they’re going to land on your hand and not the floor, wall, or furniture. 

However, if you’re used to terrestrial animals, the jumping thing may be outside your comfort zone. 

They’re clumsy 

While we’re on the subject of jumping, let me just say that a crested gecko jump isn’t a very graceful one. They don’t always hit their mark, and even when they do, it looks quite comical. 

They aren’t exactly the best hunters either, even when you’re tong-feeding them or putting insects in a bowl. They might miss a few times before they grab the grub. I’ve had a few instances where my geckos have just dropped food right after catching it. Then they have this moment of wondering why they’re no longer eating anything. 

So if you’re going to feed your crested gecko insects (which I recommend you do at least once every one or two weeks), do not just unleash them into the enclosure. They may never find them, especially if it’s something like dubia roaches, which excel at hiding. They also may accidentally ingest loose substrate while trying to catch them. So always feed by hand/tongs or use an escape-proof feeding dish. (My geckos have learned to associate the feeding dish with insect feedings and will eagerly come to the door when they see me holding it.) 

Let’s just say it’s a good thing these guys aren’t pure insectivores or I’m not sure they’d make it out in the world! 

So now that I’ve covered the negatives, we’ll move into what makes these guys excellent pets. 

They’re not terribly expensive to setup

The standard enclosure size for an adult crested gecko is 12x12x18, with 18 inches being the height. (I prefer to upgrade adults, especially females, to an 18x18x24.) Babies do best in small/medium Kritter Keepers. So this isn’t an animal that’s going to take up a lot of space. (Unless, of course, you fall in love with them and get more than one. That can add up!) 

And unless you’re going the bioactive route, it shouldn’t be too pricey to complete the enclosure either. I always suggest going beyond the basics if you can, though, and definitely do not pick up one of those “crested gecko kits”. Those kits often include things that are unsuitable for crested geckos, or are missing things you should have. 

Since I already have a crested gecko setup guide on this site, which I update frequently, I won’t go into more detail on that here. But, essentially, the enclosure itself is probably going to be the most expensive part of the setup. 

No light or heat needed

This is going to depend on where you live and how hot/cold your room temperatures are, but crested geckos generally don’t need supplemental heat. An ideal temperature is around 75, so if you’re regularly dipping into the 60s, you might want to add some form of heat. 

If you do choose to add heat, make sure it’s connected to a thermostat! Crested geckos can overheat and dehydrate very quickly, so do not let your temperatures get too hot (80+) for lengthy periods of time. And be sure to mist down the enclosure regularly to make up for the drying effect of the heater. 

And because crested geckos are nocturnal, many keepers choose not to supply them with UV lighting. Most crested gecko diets include D3, which is an important vitamin otherwise supplied by UV lights. So they should be getting everything they need from their food. 

However, I’m an advocate for UV-B, and I find that a lot of nocturnal animals will actually use it when it’s available. The key is to give them options: places to hide completely from the UV and places to bask should they choose to do so. 

I use Arcadia’s Shadedweller lighting for all my geckos. However, since the food for my crested geckos has D3 in it, I don’t want to cause them to overdose. So I only leave the light on for a few hours in the morning. I do plan to find a diet without D3 added so that I can give them more light. 

If you’re curious about UV light and its benefits for different types of reptiles, Arcadia has a great resource. 

(Above photo is Trico sleeping. Fun fact: Crested geckos don’t close their eyelids when they sleep. Instead, they have a transparent scale called a spectacle that protects the eye. You can tell when they’re sleeping, because their eyes sink in a bit. Their color will also be less vibrant, or “fired down.”)

They’re some of the most docile reptiles out there

There are some crazy cresties out there, don’t get me wrong. But, for the most part, they are calm yet active creatures. Behavior varies between individuals, so you’ll want to spend some time with a few different geckos before you find the personality type you want. 

For example, my girl Wander is super relaxed yet curious. She always wants to see what I’m doing, but not because she’s afraid of me. She has willingly jumped into my hand on a few occasions, and she’ll mostly just sit in my hand rather than jumping around. Trico, on the other hand, is very skittish. I don’t know if this was shaped by her previous owner, but she will run and hide if she thinks I might be reaching in to pick her up. She’s gotten better with time, but she’s still wary of me. 

The key to a calm gecko is to provide plenty of hiding places. For my geckos, I’ve added plenty of silk plants they can hide in. They also have cork bark tubes and some of these elevated hides. This helps them feel safe during the day while they’re sleeping. Generally, these geckos will choose a favorite place to sleep and come back to it day after day. 

And that brings me to another point. I recommend not bothering your geckos during the day, or at least not doing it regularly. If you prefer to clean during the day, find out where they’re sleeping and quietly clean around them. My geckos are typically in their elevated hides during the day, so I can clean without them ever knowing I was there. 

The best time to handle them is during the evening hours. (Mine generally start waking up around 7 or 8 PM.) Yes, they’ll have more energy then, so they might keep you on your toes. But these are normal waking hours for them, and you want them to feel comfortable sleeping during the day. If they’re stressed, they might not get the sleep they need.

If you put the time, money, and effort into caring for them properly, crested geckos are some of the best pet reptiles out there, especially for beginners. But this is probably not a good pet for you if you’re looking for an animal that will just “chill” with you. A bearded dragon, ball python, or leopard gecko may be a better choice if that’s what you’re looking for! 

[blueyesandleatherjacket]

The Fallen, 1/17

Volume: 1.

Number of parts: 1/17.

Pairings: Nine x Rose.

A/N: Written for Whumptober. Shaky Hands (D1), Explosion (D2), Delirium (D3), Gun Point (D5). Tagging @thebookster on her demand.

“We've all fallen, but at the same time we're not broken. There is the hint that we are going to get up again.” - Amy Lee.

CHAPTER 1:

Bradley Lewis was used to seeing extraordinary things in this world, things that didn’t belong here. Many would call him a liar. Many already did. He was laughing at their faces. As if their opinions ever had any importance to him. He had stopped listening to them a long time ago. Many were pointing at him when they saw or heard him. To them, he was just another waste polluting the streets, a young man who had given up on his studies to focus on the incredible imagination and scientific knowledge he had been gifted with. What use were they to him now? They had no idea and showing them would lead him into deep troubles. His friends were nicknaming him Brad Speed in reference to his first name and to his activities. Bradley was cooking a particular kind of drugs called Speedball in the streets. It was a perfect blend of cocaine and heroin. He had been a junkie before, had tried many drugs but could never find the drug… until he used his knowledge to create the ultimate one. His hands were shaking in the cold night of Manchester. He plunged them in the pockets of his coat. They were stuffed with deliveries he had to do tonight. His usual delivery guy had vanished into thin air with hundreds of pounds of merchandise. If Bradley ever found him, he would be a dead man for sure. Until then, he was doing his own deliveries. It wasn’t without risks. It never was, especially with undercover cops. Bradley was placing all his hopes on Christmas Eve to go unnoticed among people rushing to get the last things done, to go to the place where family and friends were gathered. People were waiting for him too but it wasn’t to celebrate the birth of God’s son with pagan rituals. He was Santa Claus in a way. A Father Christmas generously paid. He was the most expensive on the market but the quality of his products made the price worth it. The addiction made people come back to him for more and, like every dealer, he was diluting it. They were coming back quicker. Bradley glanced up at the dark sky and took a deep breath. The atmosphere was saturated with anxiety, excitation, joy and general good mood, with smells of food floating out of every house and every flat of the district, with Christmas songs. It was filling him with happiness. He smiled at the sky. He liked it. However, there was a hint of something spoiling this joyful night. Something dark and powerful. It gave him the chills. No one else seemed to feel it. And yet, it was everywhere. It was like a spider web slowly being weaved. Each thread was connecting to each other in an attempt to catch a prey. Who was it tonight? Was it him, the perfectly aware of the trap? Or one of those people wandering around unaware of the danger? There were still a lot of people outside. It could fall on anyone. Warning them would be useless. They would look at him as if he was crazy. It wouldn't be the first time but with the fact that something terrible was about to happen, it was frustrating. He remembered that feeling. He had experienced it before. The feeling of utter terror. He hadn’t felt this in a long while. He hadn’t missed it. That was one of the reasons he had stopped taking drugs. You couldn’t be the chemist and the junkie. He had made a choice, the choice of being clean so others could get high. The higher they got, the richer he was. Everyone thought he was a tramp but he actually had a very nice flat in the richest district of Manchester. Tonight, this money, this knowledge of sciences wasn’t preventing him from trembling. He was standing still, in the dark street. The street lights were spreading a soft glow on the pavements but obscurity was gaining ground. Anything could stand in the shadows. He was well aware of that fact. He also operated in the dark. So were the worst demons. His hallucinations always came out of the obscurity. But he was totally clean and sober. He couldn’t be in that condition anymore. His legs refused to move. His muscles were tensed to the point it was painful. The streets all around were desert, and the silence was adding to the thick atmosphere. It was hard to breathe. The exact same condition he was experiencing in his nightmares, in his hallucinations. He was expecting to see it, the golden Wolf. It would come out of the shadows and jump on him. He didn’t know where this image was coming from but it had been haunting him for years. He was a young boy when it first appeared to him. Many therapists had hit the brick wall on its meaning. Later, the drugs had reinforced his fear and materialised the Wolf. He hadn’t seen it again since he was clean but tonight… The first sign showed up as expected. It was a thread of golden light floating in the air. It was beautiful and powerful and terribly dangerous. Bradley stopped breathing. Whatever it was, it wouldn’t get in his system. There were more and more of them, gathering in the air like a poisoned fog. It grew until the whole street was filled and then, it exploded. It made no sound and yet, it was deafening. His ears were ringing, his eardrums were suffering the aftermath of the powerful explosion. It was as if there had been a gas leak, except there was no smell, no fire, no damages. Instead, there was just a man. He was standing there, looking at his hands that were glowing with that strange golden light that had filled the air a couple seconds earlier. Where had he come from? Was he born from this mini big bang? It seemed like the only answer. He was unaffected by the power this light was clearing. He wasn’t paralyzed. He looked scared but not for the same reasons that made Bradley terrified. This man knew what this golden light was, what it was doing to him, and that was what was frightening him. He glanced up and Bradley was struck. Suddenly, he was stuck like a rabbit caught in a car’s headlights. This man’s eyes were burning as bright as his hands. The golden Wolf was here. It didn’t have the shape of the ferocious animal that had been haunting his dreams. No, the Wolf of his dreams was actually a man. The man titled his head back, his eyes now showing their flames to the dark sky, and let out a roar so lout that the ground and walls trembled. Bradley hadn’t moved. He couldn’t. He was as fascinated as terrified. He had a strange feeling. Time was not acting as usual. There was something different. A feeling of stillness as well as acceleration, a feeling of time happening all at once before his eyes while it was frozen all around him and the man. It was as cool as unbearable. He couldn’t get a grip on time and it was so quick, so raw, so brutal that his whole body was suffering from severe failures. His head was burning and his mind was screaming the same words over and over again: ‘I’m the Bad Wolf. I create myself.’ It was a litany, a song, a memory. Bradley closed his eyes pressed his hands on his ears, wishing for it to be done already. It was worse than the worst of his nightmares. He wanted to wake up from this, wake up in the comfort and safety of his bedroom. All of a sudden, it was all over. The lights, the voice, the pressure. Bradley fell on his knees. The distinct thumb that followed informed him that the man had fallen too. He was scared to go and check on him. Himself was shaking, panting, just by being caught in the diameter of this power’s field of action. This man was the epicentre. He probably was dead. But he had to check. It was the normal thing to do as a human. Even as a terrified human. His legs were wobbly when he stood up. He reeled to the middle of the streets where the man was now laying still. “Sir?” Bradley called out. The man showed no reaction to the sound of his voice. It sounded muffled. The explosion had hurt his ears for real. He spoke louder. Was it a reaction he had seen? The fingers had moved. Bradley walked closer. The man opened his eyes wide. No more golden light. Just a bloke who appeared out of the blue. He sat up straight, Bradley stepped back. He looked crazy, feverish. High. “Are you okay?” Bradley swallowed when the man darted his eyes on him. He meant nothing hostile but Bradley took another step back. Just a precaution. He was up on his feet now. Old ripped jeans, a shirt that had seen better days. No shoes. No ID papers. “Do you know someone called Rose Tyler?” Bradley shook his head. The man was annoyed and disappointed by this answer and the urgency and barely hidden panic in his voice was making the situation look really serious. Whoever was this Rose Tyler and whatever this man had to do with her, it was important. “That’s the wrong place,” he babbled. “Right time but wrong place. I need to get to London now.” “It’s Christmas Eve, sir.” “Especially because it’s Christmas Eve! I gotta find her before… It’s not right. It’s not right at all. Can’t you see it? Are all humans as stupid as you?!” The man continued his angry ramble and suddenly, he was running away. Bradley didn’t move, didn’t run after him. Whatever drug he was taking, it was a strong one. The man was in a deep delirium. The comedown would be hard for him. Bradley should have called someone, the police or an ambulance. This man needed help obviously. But he couldn’t take the risk of getting caught with drugs on him. And how would he explain what had happened earlier? They would throw him with the crazy guys in one of the NHS in town. Or in jail. He had to avoid that so he played selfish and left without a word about this man.

x

“Sir, I’m gonna ask you to stop and turn around with your hands above your head.” Ashes were falling from the sky, covering the ground with white flakes, imitating snow. It smirked but stopped running on this soft ground. It was giving this human police officer a semblance of power but it was the one with all the cards. His host had reached London too late, and the Powell Estate even later. Hours too late. He had knocked on Jackie’s door, been called names and slapped and kicked out by the terrible Jackie. He couldn’t tell if Rose was there or if she had gone back with the new Doctor but Jackie was obviously blaming him for something. He had tried to warn her, to let her know about the situation but couldn’t place a word. The older Tyler had been in power and he couldn’t get to Rose. He couldn’t tell her. This had thrown him in such a rage that he had lost himself to the entity living inside him. Now, it was in control, using his body to do as it pleased. Something he wasn’t delighted with. “Turn around. Hands up.” As if it was ever gonna happen. This officer was just a toy in its hands. It loved being in control. It could make this man disappear in just a snap of fingers. Just like that. It was held up though. The consciousness of his host, the reminder of thousands lives already gone were weighing heavy on his shoulders. It sighed heavily and surrendered to its reasonable side. It raised its hands nonchalantly and turned around with a broad smile on its face. “Is there a problem, officer?” Its eyes were shining with that golden glow. The officer moved backward in an almost unnoticeable way but it did notice it. That man was feeling the threat behind this raggedy looks. Good. He would be prudent. He wouldn’t provoke the wrath of a stranger in the dark. English police officers were unarmed which was both good and bad. Even if he was armed and pointing a gun at him now, what could a bullet do to something that could dissolve it before it was fired. “A woman called to tell us that a man was harassing her. You match her description.” The smile was gone, replaced by an expression of profound disgust. Jackie. She had sent the cops after him. Cops. Us. There were several officers. So why was there only one before him? There must be another one somewhere around. Cops always worked in team of two. Its senses were on alert. If there was a threat – beside itself – it wouldn’t be taken by surprise. “Ah.” He faked a sad smile. “Jackie Tyler, innit? Her daughter just broke up with me. I was trying to talk to her but Jackie kicked me out. Calling the police was another one of her excessive reactions.” “You don’t look like someone who has been dumped recently.” It shrugged. The police officer was cleverer than he looked. It pretended to be really affected and unable to know how to feel about the end of this relationship that had been so addictive to him. It apologised for the bother. It wouldn’t happen again. It lowered his arms slowly. They were done. It could go. It was about to turn around when it lost the control. The anger was gone. He was back and desperate and weak. His legs gave way and he collapsed to the ground. “It’s in my head. In our heads. The Wolf. The Wolf. The Bad Wolf. It’s not gone. It’s still there. I need the Doctor. I need to tell Rose. The Bad Wolf isn’t gone.” He went on and on until exhaustion hit him. He fought it. He couldn’t fall asleep. Not now. The situation was critical. He had to tell Rose. They had to let the Doctor know. But the darkness took over and he was out.

To be continued...

The Fallen © | 2019 | Tous droits réservés.

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English version:

AO3 || TS.

[joesbbqandfootmassage]

We need to talk about Jane and Carlos…

So if someone had to ask me what one of the most underrated things in the world was, I would definitely say dcoms. (Disney Channel Original Movies)

They’re cheesy and dumb and not a single one lacks their flaws.

But they are still just so fun to watch and you just get a whole new experience from watching dcoms than you do any other movie.

Now among all those dcoms is a sub genre of musicals, being made popular by the one and only High School Musical trilogy. But we also have the Cheetah Girls, Teen Beach Movie, ZOMBIES, and the Descendants.

Now while all of those movie series are amazing in their own right, I’m gonna zero in on Descendants.

Kenny Ortega’s big return to Disney Channel and oh my gosh was it hyped up.

You couldn’t go two minutes watching Suite Life on Deck reruns without having this shoved in your face.

And you’d be dang right if you thought I was excited to see it. The children of iconic Disney characters all in one shared universe? Sign me the heck up!

Of course we got rid of cable before it came out and it would be maybe two years later until i finally considered watching it with my sister.

Needless to say our reaction could be boiled down to, “Oh. Oh no.”

Love it or hate it, as a movie lover I can say that D1 is a fundamentally broken movie on every level.

Nothing is developed enough and it relies way too heavily on you loving Mal as a character. Spoiler alert, I don’t.

But regardless of that, D1 also introduced me to a guy named Carlos De Vil.

Now i will never be able to comprehend WHY on Earth, puppy-skinning, vampire bat, inhumane beast, Cruella De Vil would EVER do the do with anyone and then still keep the baby after not killing it during pregnancy.

But she did and there he was.

Canonically physically and mentally abused by his mother to such a degree that he wakes up at night screaming.

Something Disney had never really had the guts to do before.

And immediately he charmed the heck out of me because regardless of how awful he had it on the Isle, it didn’t take a genius to see that he was a genuinely a good person at heart.

He was so clearly different and that was shown through maybe a culmination of like five minutes of screen time and Cameron’s incredible acting abilities.

And he deserved so much more in those movies than what was given to him but I won’t complain.

Because we still need to talk about another sweetheart.

Jane gets even less development than Carlos which is to be expected since she isn’t a main character, but you can still figure out and understand her if you read between the lines.

In D1 you not only get the fact that she likes to hide in her own little bubble, but she’s also incredibly insecure. So much so that Mal is quickly able to see it and take advantage of it.

Spending her whole life having to repeat that it’s not the outside that matters, it’s the inside, even though she doesn’t completely believe.

And then someone comes forward and basically validates her in her belief that she isn’t pretty, but she could be if she stopped focusing on the inside.

That’s what leads to her downward spiral throughout the movie as she lets her newfound “beauty” (seriously bobbed hair is cute and Disney needs to calm down) go to her head and she turns on Mal and the rest of the VKs.

Now while I find Mal to be completely irrational, her reversing Jane’s spell makes sense.

It’s Jane’s actions that follow.

Her, so desperate to be beautiful (literally she is so gorgeous how?) deciding to steal her mother’s wand isn’t paced very well and doesn’t make a lot of sense in the plot. But they just wanted to avoid Mal being the cause of the barrier being brought down so her redemption would be easier.

A classic Kylo Ren of avoiding direct contact and having it all be indirect so they can easily be forgiven later.

Now by all means after her actions that day, I’m surprised Jane herself isn’t sent to jail.

But I guess in D3 they show that they have an AK bias so whatever.

Now the important thing about this is that Carlos is there for all of Jane’s worst moments.

The moments where she is not at her best emotionally and it’s manifesting in bad ways. He knows that Mal had planned to use her to get to the wand in the first place before dumping her when that wasn’t going anywhere.

He knows that’s she’s afraid of them by the way she reacts to them in her first scene in Goodness Class.

He knows all of that.

And he still drags her onto a dance floor, refusing to let her be alone.

You could argue that Jay was there too, but her immediately ditched to jump on the Audrey train so…

This small moment, Carlos’ selfless act of kindness, plants a seed that most people laughed at or rolled their eyes - but all the same it was there.

And that little seed began to grow until two years later (six months in the actual movies) we get a beautiful Janelos flower.

Now D2 Janelos is some quality stuff and never have I seen so many people hate a ship that hasn’t done anything wrong.

And I think it’s fitting that Carlos’ arc for D2 is all centered around Jane.

In the first movie, he conquered his fear of dogs.

Now in this movie, he conquers his fear of being rejected by her.

Now if you’re an over analyzer by nature and a Carlos stan by choice, you tend to pick up on subtleties that Disney doesn’t have the guts to cover. Most notably, Carlos being touch/affection starved

You can see it in the ways his mother doesn’t show him love outside of threats and total, emotional reliance. In the way the VKs don’t particularly reciprocate his touches unless absolutely necessary. Or unless you’re Jay and you need to pull and alpha male moment and start wrastling.

And you can definitely see it in the way he thrives off of contact with Dude, and later, Jane.

Now somehow you people don’t think it is absolutely incredible that Carlos De Vil, physically and emotionally abused since birth, grew up on the Isle where love and dating were not a common place thing, fell in love.

And with the girl that was afraid of him in the first movie.

And omg I could talk about Carlos “Heart Eyes” De Vil forever and ever. Amen.

But instead I’m gonna talk about the three most major Janelos scenes in the film.

First one is gonna be the truth gummy scene.

First of all, Carlos’ puppy dog eyes when he’s thinking about Jane restore my life to the full one million years I am supposed to live.

People you are not allowed to overlook what Carlos was going to do in this short and beautiful scene.

Because he’s never really lived a life where he can speak his mind and share his feelings, the whole movie he’s struggling to even figure out how he can open up to Jane.

Not change his personality to get her attention.

Not making a love potion that’ll force her to love him.

No, he decides that the only way to approach it is honesty - by that I mean he agrees to sacrifice lying for the rest of his mortal life. And Mal gives him plenty of reasons to back out, most of them being about her but still, and he simply replies, “I’ll take my chances.”

Ugh.

The world did not do anything good enough to earn Carlos De Vil.

But the thing is, the truth gummy is his only hope to help him spit out how he feels about Jane. Because whenever he’s in her presence all he can do is freeze up and stutter. Simply due to the fact that when he’s faced with the chance, Carlos has no clue how to describe what he feels and what he wants.

But he knows that his heart does.

It’s in there somewhere and dang he’s gonna get it out because he cares about her so much and just wants to TELL her how he feels when he looks at her.

Of course then Dude eats it and all those years Carlos’ heart eyes had given me instantly went away again.

And then the whole Janelos plot line takes a bit of a nap until the third act of the movie when Carlos decides that Mal alienating herself from the Core Four ain’t helping her mental health and their friendship.

That’s when he drops the absolute BARS of knowledge, “Then don’t.”

He tells her that she never should change herself just to make someone else happy, you’ll never know if they really love you that way.

And I just wanna take a moment to wonder where Carlos got all these strong good person energies, because being raised on an Isle where love and dating aren’t even concepts should show in all the VKs.

Yet in D2 and D3 we can see that Carlos and Evie both seem to approach love with an impressive maturity that I can’t even fathom how they figured it out.

His advice is a comfort to Mal as well as Jay’s protective big brother move, and then we get to see the way his own advice affects him.

His Lovecraftian horror paraphrases what he said in the earlier conversation, “If she doesn’t love you for who you are than she isn’t the one.”

But this applies differently than in the Ben/Mal situation.

Carlos doesn’t try to change who he is or how he acts (unless you count the sacrificing lying thing but that wasn’t really used to earn her love so) but he gets the general idea.

And so, Carlos offers himself to her.

Just him, and a date and his love because that’s all he has to give her.

And she can either say yes and accept him and he can finally begin to understand what he’s feeling.

Or, she can turn him away - not wanting anything to do with what he has for her.

Which leads to such a beautiful scene, ugh I could write songs about the Janelos confession scene it’s that good.

First you see Carlos running at the speed of sound just to catch her, and he was definitely running around the whole campus because he absolutely needed to do this before he chickened out like every other time in the movie.

And at first it doesn’t seem to click in Jane’s head, because she’s only ever been just Jane.

Not pretty like Audrey or athletic like Lonnie.

Boys didn’t flirt with her or ask her out on dates, certainly not the boys she liked.

So of course, like the other times he had tried, she just wasn’t getting it. Too preoccupied with party planning and not getting her hopes up to let it sink in.  And that’s when Carlos does something that he didn’t even need a truth gummy to do.

He gives her a list of all that he can give her, looking into her eyes and waiting for her to take or leave it

And not only does she take it, but she fully adds all the things on the list that she’s always wanted to do with him, giving herself right back to him in the process.

Leaving Carlos absolutely shocked and overwhelmed and happy.

He just figured she’d either say yes or no.

Her giving herself to him wasn’t even a consideration in his mind.

And then she throws him for a loop once again, by throwing her arms around him and holding him tight.

And honestly, Carlos’ reaction says it all.

The first time somebody initiated legitimate affection towards him, and it’s from the girl he loves no less.

He’s at a loss for words and can’t even fathom what he’s feeling, but finally, Carlos is the one hugging back. Clinging onto her for dear life because it’s almost like he can’t believe this is real.

The next time we see them, they’re both looking super fine at cotillion; and let me tell you that seeing touch starved Carlos finally getting to hold hands and cuddle with his girlfriend makes me weak every time. You can see that for now, they’re figuring it out, they’ve both been super far away from the whole love thing so now they’ve just gotta go at a healthy pace for them.

Regardless of that, you can really see how much they not only love but need each other.

And then it was gonna be another two years until we’d get to figure what the writers were gonna do with Janelos, if anything at all.

During that time I had gotten well acquainted with the horrifying wall of Janelos hate you had to walk along before getting occasional content. So obviously, I chose to have nothing to do with the fandom and then Janelos fell off my radar again until I found the nerve to watch the third movie.

And oh my goodness remember just a few lines ago when I said that Jane and Carlos needed each other?

That was the key point of their story in D3.

While I think it’s poorly shown, Carlos’ character arc from a quiet abuse victim with a good heart to an honest to goodness hero (I’m talking the kinds they write songs about) is just amazingly beautiful and deserved so much more screen time than it actually got.

In D3, Carlos finally has something to lose.

Or, more accurately, something he needs to protect.

I really wish they had zeroed in on him worrying about Jane more, because while it was still there it wasn’t very focused on.

Not that I can be mad because their reuniting scene was something that made me immediately sit up in my chair and go, “Oh my fluffing gosh they have a thing.”

Like I’m sorry, what?

You’re telling me that whenever they cling to each other like that Carlos has that same look of just, pure happiness.

“She loves me and I love her, I’m never letting her go.”

Carlos De Vil went from someone who had never known or felt love in his life, to loving a girl so much it made me fall out of my chair.

D3 just wanted to remind us that the VKs have come very far, and now they’re happy and loved and we don’t need to worry about them.

All I can say is that Jane and Carlos are just an amazing couple if you step back and just look at what it means for them to be together.

A touch starved abuse victim and an insecure cheerleader fell in love and surrendered their hearts completely. And you don’t see that anywhere near Disney as a franchise, much less dcoms.

Bottom line, I know I went off for a hot minute but if we’re being honest I still have about a trillion things I could say about “Jarlos.”

But I’m pretty sure I’ve elaborated enough  to get my point across.

I just wanna say that Carlos would literally never let his mother come anywhere near the light of his life and that was some total BS.

[autisticdindjarin]

Hi! ~ So, every questions are for Tacee please! ~ A: 2 5 6 12 // B: 1 13 15 16 // C 2 5 // D: 3 // E: 2 3 6 // F: 2 5 10 // G: 2 6 // H: 1 2 9 // I: 1 2 3 // J: 1 5 // L: 1 2 3 ?

That’s a lot! I love it.

A2) What alignment are they? Chaotic neutral, lawful evil, et cetera…

Chaotic neutral

A5) Are they good at handling change in their life?

Absolutely not.

A6) Does your OC tend to assume their interpretation of events and reality is correct, or do they question it? I.e., “I’m sure that’s what you said” versus “It’s possible I misheard you.”

She assumes that she is correct most of the time, and highly trusts in her own perceptions even when they are wrong.

A12) Does your OC have any addictions? If so and problematic, have they admitted it to themselves?

No.

B1) Do they believe you have to give respect to get it, or get respect to give it?

Give respect to get it.

B13) Do they have a large or small group of friends?

Suprisingly large for a Jedi. Lana, Theron, and Chiado are her main friends that she hangs out with, but she’s very close with many others - Cherise, Adahn, Garrede, Koth, Kira, Rusk, T7, and Zora to name a few.

B15) Does your OC enjoy social events, such as parties, clubs, et cetera..?

Yes! She’s very much an extrovert and outgoing, she gets her energy from being around people and loves crashing parties.

B16) Does your OC like to be the center of attention or more in the mix?

The center of attention.

C2) Would your OC feel bad if they acted against their morals? If not, would they find a way to excuse themselves for it?

Yes, but she feels the need to do so often, which leaves her with a lot of constant guilt.

C5) Do your OC’s morals and rules of common decency go out the window when it comes to those they don’t like, or when it’s inconvenient? Aka, are their morals situational?

It is situational, but based on more dire things than inconvenience or someone she doesn’t like - it goes out the door when it’s for the greater good. Or if you’re just a really fucking bad person.

D3) How comfortable are they with the idea of death?

She’s chill with her own death, not so chill with the death of others. She has a hard time letting go.

E2) Which of the nine types of intelligence is your OC strongest in? Weakest? (Linguistic, existential, naturalist, et cetera)

Strongest - bodily-kinestheticWeakest- intra-personal

E3) How many languages do they speak?

Several. Binary, Huttese, Shyriiwook, etc.

E6) Do they enjoy learning? Do they actively seek out sources of self-education?

It depends on the subject. Anything in Force combat forms, she’s ecstatic about. Orobirds are excellent.

F2) What’s their ideal home look like? Where is it?

An averaged sized abode atop a cliff on the beach, ideally around the more uninhabited areas of Rishi, where it’s warm and she can raise Orobirds!

F5) How handy are they? Can they fix appliances, cars, cabinets, et cetera?

She’s pretty good at figuring things out once you tell her how to do them, the problem being most things she hasn’t been told how to fix.

F10) Do they engage in any of the arts? How good do you intend them to be? Would they agree they are?

No.

G2) Who makes up your OC’s family, at least the more important members to them?

Torazz de-Val- Biological FatherTylora Mor- Biological MotherAnzria Shan- Adopted DaughterSenya Tirall- StepmotherArcann & Thexan- StepbrothersSatele Shan- mother-in-law, mentor

G6) Do they have any favorite childhood memories?

As a young padawan, she was taken to the Jedi Temple on Ilum as a field trip of sorts - she loved the snow, but hated the cold, and one of the Jedi Masters used a Force technique on her to keep her warm while she played in the snow. It had the effect of remaining a very warm, safe, and happy memory in her mind.

H1) What is your OC’s orientation, romantic and/or sexual? Has it ever been a source of stress for them? Have they always been pretty sure of their orientation?

Tacee is bisexual. She’s always been sure of this, but never very forthcoming, as she was always trying to fit the image of the perfect Jedi in her youth, and then later she just didn’t care enough to talk about it with everything else going on. As a young Jedi, she had a lot of different sexual affairs with people - Garrede, Leeha Narezz & Jomar Chul (at the same time), Somminick Timmns, Doc, Lemda Avesta, and more.

H2) Is your OC a thoughtful partner, in whatever aspect of that you want to cover?

Sometimes. She tends to be absent-minded on a lot of things when it comes to anything emotional, and often has to be grounded to get back on focus. Her first real relationship with Lemda is somewhat of a disaster because Tacee just takes things for granted and doesn’t come through emotionally like Lemda needs her to.

H9) What are some things that your OC finds to be an instant turn-off in potential partners?

Arrogance.

I1) What are their favorite kinds of flavors– Sweet, salty, sour, spicy, creamy, et cetera?

Sweet!

I2) Do they have any eating requirements or preferences? Allergies, vegetarian, organic-only, religious restrictions…

Tacee, as a Togruta, is a carnivore, only eating meat, preferably non-cooked.

I3) Are they vegan/vegetarian (if their overall culture/species generally aren’t)? If so, why? Do they think animal products are wrong in all circumstances?

No.

J1) Where does your OC stand most politically? What would they align with most?

She’s gray aligned on most things, but her morals guide her politics, so while she does try to at least work with the Empire, she’s very against their views on slavery and well, imperialism, and general specism (??). But she’s not fond of the Republic’s military workings either.

J5) Are they or would they protest for a cause they’re passionate about?

Yes.

L1) How have your characters changed since you created them?

I used to have her with just the game design, but I made a lot of tweaks to her appearance myself for the patterns on her face and montrals.

L2) What do you consider the biggest themes in your character, if any?

Gray morality and learning to love and let herself be loved.

L3) Did you create the character to be like yourself, did they end up being like yourself, or are they very different from you?

No, I didn’t have myself in mind when I created Tacee, though she did end up with some of my traits like Autism. Otherwise, she’s pretty much opposite of me, being outspoken and opinionated.

[highschoolharrier]

Justin Wrigley is the coach of St. Thomas Aquinas High School in Kansas who currently is riding an impressive state championship win streak and looks to be in contention for a bid to NXN via the Heartland region.

High School Harrier: Your teams are entering the year with recent state championship winning streaks there in Kansas. Can you say a little about how your team has attained that level of excellence?

Justin Wrigley: Our boys team has won four straight state titles and the girls finished third last year which ended a streak of five straight state titles. I definitely believe that the biggest factor for our success is the team culture. There are no magic workouts and there is no magic mileage that guarantees success. Every program is somewhat different in those areas but what has been working the best for us is the team culture.  We have had an incredible level of buy-in from the kids over the years and that has helped us achieve many of our goals. We've been blessed with large numbers of kids that are fun, positive and hard working. Because of that, Saints cross country has become a really great place to be. The cross country kids really like being around each other and even though all of the training is a great commitment of time and effort, I think that they just really like doing it together and so we are seeing the benefit of that when we race. It's really awesome that there are so many kids with the same attitude about the sport and the training process. The key is keeping it fun and positive because negativity can tear the whole thing down really fast. We are just like every other high school in the country, we have to always be on the lookout for negativity and try to change those types of behaviors before it does damage to our culture. It is a never-ending process but it's the true key to success in cross country.

HSH: State is 2 weeks before the NXR Heartland meet.  Do you think this is too far away, not far enough away or a good amount of time between the two?

JW: I think two weeks is just about perfect! I think that period of time allows kids to celebrate state and also sharpen back up physically and emotionally for NXR. When we first started making the trip to NXR, I don't think that anyone on our team managed the post-state emotions really well. We'd get too up for state and had nothing left in the emotional tank up at NXR despite being physically ready. When we started taking larger groups up to NXR and changed some of the ways we thought about the postseason, we saw our teams improve dramatically at the Heartland meet. Putting NXR on the calendar and planning to attend well before the season even starts has really helped the way our kids prepare emotionally and psychologically and that has really helped. I also think it's really important to get your sub varsity kids to the NXR open races. Those open races are more competitive than almost any state meet and so you're giving sub varsity kids a championship caliber meet to shoot for while also extending their training season by several weeks and getting them experience for when they become your varsity in the NXR championship race. I can't see any negative side to getting as many kids as possible to the NXR meet.

HSH: Do your boys and girls train together?

JW: Yes, we usually have 80-100 kids on our team in any given year and we do everything together. We split up into training groups for workouts but we'll often have girls and boys training together if they are similar in fitness and ability. Our top girl, Olivia Sovereign, trains with the boys. She has a little brother on the team and they push each other really hard in workouts. It is pretty awesome.

HSH: How does your team set their goals each year?

JW: We start each summer with goal meetings. We vote for the captains for the next season at the end of the current season and oftentimes the first official duty of the new captains is to schedule and organize our goal meetings in early June. We have separate meetings for the boys and girls teams even though we do most stuff together.  At that meeting we sit around for about an hour and try to have an open conversation about the types of things we want to accomplish. We have a follow up meeting with our kids at our team camp in mid-July. Recently, we've made our goals more about team culture rather than race outcomes and I feel like that is taking the program in a really cool direction. This season we're trying to make our season focus on being selfless in everything we do.

HSH: Is there anyone on your team that you feel is ready to have a breakout year?

JW: I sure hope so, hahaha!  We have had the type of summer that makes a coach really excited about the upcoming season. We have seen a lot of kids running very consistently and so I'm feeling pretty confident that some guys and girls will be stepping up and making a big impact this fall.  I'd love to name some names but I'd probably end up upsetting anyone I did not mention so I better just keep quiet and we will have to wait and see who goes out there and proves themselves this fall!

HSH: What regular season meet are you most looking forward to and why?

JW: The Rim Rock Classic is always one of the highlights of our season. It's a huge meet on the state meet course and in addition to most of the Kansas teams attending, we will also get to see many of the teams from around the heartland and midwest regions. We also get some teams from Colorado and Texas most years. Unfortunately, Kansas has a rule that nobody from outside of 500 miles of our border can attend our events but maybe someday that will change.  In the meantime, this meet is the biggest draw in Kansas every year and I love to get varsity, jv and c-team kids experience on our state meet course so when their time comes, they know the course very well. This year we will also be traveling up to Roy Griak in Minnesota. Usually that meet falls on Rim Rock weekend and we don't go because we don't want to pass up the chance to race on our state meet course but this year the schedule lined up a little different so we'll be going there to get a little preview of the Heartland region. There are so many good teams at Griak and it will be a great mid-season check up on how we're progressing towards our postseason goals. My buddy, Jason Druten of West Torrance, California is bringing his boys to Griak so it will be really fun to hang out with him and go toe to toe with his guys. They were the CIF D3 champs last year and we have a strong bond with their team.

HSH: For us who are not from Kansas, what is the qualifying process for state?

JW: The Kansas qualifying process is about as simple as it gets. For each classification (we have 6 of them in KS) there are four regional meets, geographically separated and the top three teams from each region qualify for state.  Classes 3A, 5A and 6A compete at Rim Rock Farm, one of the nation's most beautiful courses and classes 1A, 2A and 4A compete at the Wamego golf course. Both courses have their share of challenging hills at critical points of the race. Don't let anyone tell you that Kansas doesn't have any hills!

HSH: Do you have a motto or mantra for your program?

JW: We have two and we use them all of the time! Our cultural motto is, "Take care of each other" and our training and racing motto is, "B.A.U.," which simply means, "business as usual."  Both mottos are pretty simple but they both accomplish a great amount of good when people actually live the mottos.  Culturally, we want cross country to be something that everyone enjoys and feels good about. Running is hard and so is high school. Every day is not going to be your best day. We want people to be there for each other and help them get through the tough times. In doing so, we will all make each other better and then we'll have people with us to also celebrate the good times.  When we speak about B.A.U., we're talking about doing things the right way, every day. We want our process to become a habit. If we can accomplish that, then when we get to the postseason we can take a lot of the pressure off by reminding the kids that all they have to do is simply keep doing things the way they always have. There is no pressure to do anything special in the postseason and because of that we tend to run really well because our kids are not pressing to do anything more than usual. Both mottos are lifestyle goals and I think they are very helpful in how we approach things.  

HSH: What component of your program do you think is the biggest factor in the success of your team?

JW: Every coach probably says this but I believe that the biggest factor in our success has to be team culture. Getting the athletes to buy in to what we are trying to accomplish and how we need to go about our business is so important. On top of that, the even bigger factor is easily how much the kids grow to care about each other through the process. When we get a lot of kids sharing in the experience and working together, they develop this unbreakable bond that just seems to work wonders when they get to the toughest part of their races. They want so badly to contribute to the shared success that they'll do anything for each other.  Although only 7 boys and 7 girls get to race at the state meet, we take the entire team to the meet (usually 80-100 kids).  We bus them out to Rim Rock and they cover the course in blue and gold and give us an enormous advantage. Matt Hallauer, one of our assistant coaches, organizes that group to be the best state meet support crew around. He has laminated maps for every kid and details on the best places to cheer and how to navigate the farm so you can get to as many places as possible. We have people cheering for our kids on every step of the course and right now no one else in Kansas can match that. When we finish the state meet, we share that moment with every single kid on our team. Everyone that has worn the blue and gold in competition that year can proudly say that they helped contribute to our success. We wait until the awards ceremony is over and then we put our entire team on the podium. Kids that can't yet break 25 minutes get to stand on the podium and hold the state trophy. That's pretty powerful and I think that kind of experience for a high school cross country runner is priceless.

HSH: What was your biggest learning moment as a coach, pertaining to how you coach or the way you train your athletes?

JW: I can actually pinpoint this moment to the winter of 2011. I had been the head cross country coach for five years and finally decided to do an exact study of how much we were running in the off season. At the time we had not started logging our training yet so after investigating, it turned out that even our most dedicated athletes were only running about 55% of the days in the winter. This came as a big shock to me as I assumed the number would be much higher. So we started logging our training and pushing for greater accountability and consistency. The biggest change we had to make was getting kids to run over the weekends and switch to taking days off only when needed rather than automatically putting them on the calendar every week for no reason at all. This increase in consistency had a huge payoff for us. Starting in 2012, we won five girls team titles and four boys team titles with five girls and three boys individual champions. That winter was an epiphany that has changed our program in a major way. Consistency is the key!

HSH: What steps do you take to ensure your top athletes progress each year?

JW: I think being present and available for all of our athletes all year long is probably the most important thing I can do as a coach. Consistency and accountability are critical to progressing as a runner so if I want the kids to train with any level of consistency then I better show up as well.  For Saint Thomas Aquinas, that means having a regular off season training program for both the summer and the winter, showing up on weekends and coaching track & field in the spring. On top of that, logging our training and keeping an eye on the training logs to make sure each kid is progressing at the proper rate is also important. And finally, just planning sound training progressions for each kid based on age and experience so you can gradually push them more as they get more experience.

HSH: How much volume does your team get during the summer?

JW: We build up very gradually, perhaps too gradually compared to some but by the end of the summer we like to have our upperclassmen in the 50-70 miles per week range. Sophomores could be anywhere from 30-60 depending on the kid and freshmen are all over the place but the really dedicated ones might be in the 30-45 range. All of this, of course, depends greatly on training age and experience of the individuals. Like I said, we're just like every other team so we're also going to have our share of kids that show up on day one that have not run a step all summer.  Managing all these kids is important and you can't just expect any single kid to fit to a broad training scheme.

HSH: What do you feel helps your program buy into the team concept so effectively?

JW: That is a great question. Sometimes I wonder why all of these kids are doing this because it is hard. Cross country is simple, but it is hard. Anyone that thinks cross country is easy is doing it wrong.  My very best guess at what helps kids buy in is simply other kids.  I think that once some kids take that leap of faith with us and then they not only see some success but experience a lot of fun, then they become our best sales-people. They are the ones that go out and convince other kids to do the same. People want to have fun and they want to succeed, those are both basic ideas that appeal to all humans. So if kids see a bunch of kids doing those things, they become intrigued in doing so too, even though it require so much hard work and sacrifice of time and effort.

HSH: I am a freshman joining your cross country program.  What will my training and racing look like this fall?

JW: As a freshman, the top focus of our coaching staff would be to ensure that you are having fun and enjoying the sport. We're going to be real cautious with what we throw at you in terms of volume and intensity. The first thing we'll do when the season starts is analyze your summer and plan out the progression of the season based on what you did or did not do in the summer.  Freshmen typically race every weekend because we want to gain experience at running 5k and because most kids join a team to participate. The freshmen won't take any bye weeks like the varsity kids.  

HSH: What is your favorite workout to have your runners perform and why?

JW: Are you ready for the most boring answer of all time? Because my favorite workout to do with our runners is threshold intervals, or what Jack Daniels calls "cruise intervals."  And this is something we do almost weekly all year long with our distance runners. We create variety by adjusting the length of the intervals but we typically do a total of 20-30 minutes of total volume and always at what Daniels defines as threshold pace. I just feel really good about the adaptation that comes from this level of stress on a consistent basis. Of course, a close runner up would be regular tempo and progressive runs.  We're working really hard at improving our progressive runs and the kids are really starting to enjoy them more now.  We were pretty bad at starting too fast or progressing too much, too soon when we first started doing these runs. Now that the kids have a better handle on the pacing, they really enjoy them and gain a great deal of confidence.

Photo courtesy of Justin Wrigley.

[nanogame]

What the hell is Phase Paradox and why has nobody heard of it?

I recently came across a very interesting game for the PS2 called Phase Paradox and, to my surprise, the information online about this game is very limited. I was intrigued... How can a game released over 15 years ago for one of the biggest consoles ever, be so unknown? I decided to do a little digging to find more and that’s what I’ll tackle in this post, but before we begin talking about it, a proper introduction to the series is due... Yes, to the series. Phase Paradox is no less than the sequel to the PS1 title, Philosoma. Never heard of it either, right? Don’t worry, I’ll elaborate... and spoil a bit of the first game, so be aware.

Philosoma was the first game developed by Epics Inc, the same Japanese studio who brought us Ape Escape Racing and Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex for the PSP, and a bunch of other titles you might have heard about. It was one of the first games to ever be announced for the original Playstation and it was scheduled to be a release title, however it was only released in mid-1995 in Japan, and in 1996 in the subsequent regions due to complications during development. Despite the prolonged development time, it only received mixed reviews, praising the impressive FMVs and OK-ish gameplay but condemning its dull visuals. These didn’t stop it from receiving an award for Best Shooter of 1995 by Electronic Gaming Monthly magazine.

But what is it? Philosoma plays like any other 2D/3D space shooter (with a lot of resemblances to other shooters like Galaga and Gradius) but places its emphasis on the multiple perspective gameplay, which varies from isometric to top-down/vertical scrolling to full-fledged 3D. The story is pretty simplistic: a recently colonized alien planet named Planet 220, reports a devastating attack by an unknown force and requires assistance. The player assumes the roles of D3, a rookie pilot, as well as his commander Nicolard Michau and has to try to save the planet. In the end of the game (spoiler alert) , the said planet blows up and this is where Phase Paradox picks up.

But before we get into the story and gameplay, let's see how this game came to life. Phase Paradox, as opposed to it’s prequel, was not developed by Epics Inc, but by Sony Interactive Entertainment themselves, whom had published the first game. However, for the roles of lead designer and supervisor, Sony decided to hire Takahiro Matsushima, the creator of the original game. They setup a somewhat big team, which also included Tatsuya Ishiyama as a cinematic director, who would proceed to work on the cutscenes of the very acclaimed SoulCalibur IV. Don’t let me stop you from getting amazed but there are some more names you might recognize.  The character of Renee is voiced by no less than Mary Elizabeth McGlynn (who’s also the voice director in the game), the singer of some of the non-instrumental songs by Akira Tamaoka in Silent Hill. The character of Umma is voiced by Patricia Ja Lee, whom you may know better by Jill Valentine’s mo-cap and voice actress for Resident Evil 5. Steve Kramer, who has worked as an actor and voice actor for countless productions that range from cinema to video games, voices Lance Fuller’s character too... This only shows how big the production for the game must have been and how much Sony was betting on it.

The first announcement for the game was made by Sony in January 2001 but other than the game’s genres, very few details about it were given. They also announced it would be released in two DVD-ROM discs on the 22nd of March of the same year in Japan, but no dates for the other regions were given. The first demo only appeared in Tokyo Game Show Spring 2001 and by then, the game had been postponed to May 24th, the day it was released in Japan (in only one DVD). The first impressions were decent: people were praising the sci-fi atmosphere but were reluctantly talking about the gameplay:

“Three playable characters from different time frames and different places solve mysteries from each character's perspective. Once they all meet at a certain point in the game, the mysteries begin to unfold. As opposed to the theme of humans vs. aliens or zombies in most of the recent action-adventure games in the genre, this game is about human interaction, trust, and deceit...”

Now, this is where things start to get interesting! If you’re confused, because you were expecting details for a shooter, don’t be! Despite being a direct sequel to Philosoma, its genre is completely different. The sequel is not a 2D/3D shooter like its predecessor, but an action-adventure game with a lot of sci-fi and survival horror influences. The player can control three characters across a field map with pre-rendered backgrounds, similarly to the original Resident Evil games, however the action factor is not present. What I mean is, the player doesn’t shoot or solve puzzles. The player simply moves the characters in between cutscenes and is prompted to do binary choices of yes and no by pressing the X or circle buttons. By making the “wrong” choice, the player usually dies and is prompted to try again. This being said, the game can be easily completed by trial and error and this might just justify why most of the reviews I found online, even if scarce, were all condemning this gameplay mechanic. I’m not saying it’s very good but it seems to me that they’re were going for what could’ve been the beginning of tell-tale games like we know them today. The game also has three different endings, one for each playable character, depending on which one you choose to follow during the final phase of the game (you eventually play them all, to finish the game), which I thought was pretty interesting.

In my opinion, there are two things that this game nailed completely. The UI design and the atmosphere. The cover of the game is beautiful, that’s not an argument, but wait until you boot up the game! The main menu is gorgeous and damn satisfying to use. It’s the perfect intro for the game, which in its whole, gave me a vibe of “Blade Runner meets the The Thing”. Maybe because of the futuristic look of the pre-rendered surrounding environments, along with an interesting sound landscape that heavily relies on background noises, using music only when really necessary. The voice acting (done entirely in English with Japanese subtitles) is pretty satisfactory and goes well with the animation and even though it feels a bit cheesy at times, which game doesn’t? The cutscenes are decent, however, I’m really saddened by the fact that they couldn’t get the facial expressions right while the characters are talking, but hey, they tried! 

I got used to the game and to its flaws after the first hour, and got some enjoyment out of the whole experience and that’s why I’m writing this post. Most reviews of the game are bad, but I would still recommend it to anyone interested in survival horror and/or sci-fi, and any PS2 enthusiast. 

It’s an interesting landmark in PS2′s history that went completely unnoticed. But why? Despite the English voice over (which kind of proves Sony was intending to release the game worldwide), the game never got released outside of Japan. That means that if you owned a NTSC-U or PAL console, you’d need to import the game and you’d also need a modchip or an emulator to play it, hence making it hard for a common gamer to find and play the game. That doesn’t explain, however, why the mentions to this game on Japanese websites are nearly non existent... The game does have a small page on the Japanese Wikipedia, but there is no page for it on the English Wikipedia, so I’d say the Japanese are winning on this one!

For those of you who are interested in trying the game, you don’t need to play the first one (I didn’t) to enjoy Phase Paradox and even though all text is in Japanese, that will certainly not be a problem since all voices are in English. My copy of the game cost me a little over 5€ on eBay with shipping included, so if you want to add it to your collection, price will certainly not hold you back either. I’d recommend not watching any videos on it, since they might ruin the experience for you, take your go at it with an open mind and above else, have fun!