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#but i've always been looking forward to getting a letter that let me know that someone took their time to read my writing
lady-de-mon-coeur · 11 months
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Not a single kudos on ao3 today. I know I shouldn't be surprised, but still hurts.
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chunghasweetie · 3 months
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Haiii i've never submitted a request so bare with me.
What do you think about a criminal jk who's been in prison for over a year (don't know what crime u can pick honestly) him and y/n are in a established relationship and she's been waiting all this time for him to get out. Anyway he comes home and yk.. i'm sure you can get the rest ;)
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𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐘 | J.JK
— pairing | fem!oc x criminal!jjk
— summary | (sorry it took so long!🩷) jungkook’s been locked up for 4 years and he’s finally back to see you !
— warning | bad writing (i’m doing my best)
unprotected sex, cursing, praising, daddy kink, dirty talk, crying, fluff(?)
— word count | 3.5k words
— song suggestion | wrong in the right way — chris brown
It was his first night freed from his 4 year jail sentence. After having a buddy drop off his car on the way to her, he was finally there.
Locked up for assault and battery and countless other charges he was finally free and finally able to see his woman again.
His tatted, muscular body stood at her doorstep, “Fuck,” He exhaled, taking a drag from his cigarette.
He was anxious to see her after endless phone calls and letters for years. He surprised her a day early. He finally stopped thinking about it and knocked at her door.
“Coming!” She hurried down the stairs, not expecting any guests at that hour.
She was in her pajama outfit, hair lightly curled and her face bare beside some eye brightener.
She opened the door, and she had almost gone into shock.
She came to a full body pause, color practically draining from her face when she seen him. “J-Jungkook!”
Jungkook's eyes softened at the sight of her, seeing the tears. He stepped forward, grabbing her in a tight embrace.
“I missed you so fucking much Y/n.” He mumbled into her hair. His hands ran up and down her back, holding her close.
She sobbed, “You bastard! Why didn’t you let me know you got out early?! I would’ve picked you up, done my makeup better, took you to dinner—“ She rambled.
Jungkook pulled back, gazing down at her with a smirk.
“Because I wanted to surprise you, Y/n. And you look fucking perfect just like this.” He ran his hand through her hair, tucking a strand behind her ear. “Finally face to face with my queen.”
“Fucking come in.” She sniffed. “All standing here in my doorway.” She hurried him in.
Jungkook stepped inside, his eyes scanning the apartment.
It looked a lot different than what he had remembered. It was a lot more modern and a bit girly. But it still felt like home.
He took a deep breath, inhaling the familiar scent of her perfume. He followed her to the living room, his eyes locked on her as she walked away from him. He couldn't help but grin.
He was finally home.
“Missed you so much” She sniffed. “I didn’t fucking plan anything— Shit. You gotta be hungry right? Are you cold?”
“Relax baby. I didn’t expect you to be completely ready tonight,” He wrapped his arms around her from behind, pulling her close to him.
“But yes, I am fucking starving. Even thought I just wanna sit here and hold you.” He nuzzled his face into her neck, breathing in her scent.
“No baby— Gotta take care of you first. Probably want to eat good. Prison must’ve been so rough.” She pouted, babying him.
“Yeah, it was. But nothing's worse than being away from you, ma. You know that, right?” He pulled away from her, turning her around to face him.
He cupped her cheeks, his thumbs rubbing against her soft skin. “I missed your smile, your laugh, your attitude. Everything Y/n.”
“I missed you more than you could imagine Jungkook.” Her lip quivered. “So much.”
“I know, ma. You always made sure I know. You were always the one person I could count on, even behind bars.” He leaned in, pressing his lips to hers.
The kiss was soft and gentle, but it held a depth of passion that only they could understood. “I love you.”
“I love you more. So much more.” She kissed him back, “I’ll cook for you. I’ll show you to our room— I fixed it up for you!”
She led him upstairs, rushing him due to her excitement. “Are you ready to see it?”
“I'm more than ready, ma. I've been dreaming of this moment for so long. I've missed our bed, our room, all of it."
He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. "You look stunning, ma. You've never looked more beautiful to me."
Their room looked more homey and relaxing. She bought him a whole new closet full of clothes and shoes to his liking.
“I bought you some new ashtrays to put on your nightstand.” She told him. “There’s some lighters down there too.”
“You're spoiling me. And I’m more than grateful. I can already smell the smoke wafting through the air. You know me more than anyone." He grinned, running his hand over the new clothes.
"I love what you've done here, ma. You really outdid yourself for me and I couldn’t thank you more.” He added, thanking her once more.
“Anyrhing for you. I wanted you to come home and feel comfortable and relaxed.” She smiled.
“Now go shower, change, whatever you need to do to get all that prison time off your skin.” She laughed. “I’m gonna go downstairs and cook you some food that’ll knock you the hell out.”
Jungkook smiled, pulling her into a deep, passionate kiss. "You're the best, ma. I love you so fucking much." He whispered, giving her earlobe a gentle kiss before pulling away. "I'll be down in a few.”
“Take your time baby. Really.” She pecked his cheek, hesitant to leave him while she walked down to the kitchen.
Jungkook grabbed her hand before she could walk away, bringing it to his lips for a gentle kiss.
"Thank you again baby— Seriously." He gave her a reassuring smile, squeezing her hand gently.
She left him and headed back downstairs, prepping dinner for him.
“I’ll miss you!” She called out from the kitchen, blushing and giggling in excitement.
She couldn’t believe he was really out of prison.
For years she spent everyday fantasizing and day dreaming about him finally living at home again. For him to actually be here was ground breaking.
She had devoted herself to that man the entire time he’d been away. Her friends would try to encourage her to see other men to fill in the gaps of his absence but she absolutely refused.
She had many opportunities. She was a beautiful woman.
But no other man could ever compare to Jungkook.
She started preparing a quick yet savory meal for them to eat while he was showering.
She had prepped wonton soup for the actual night of his arrival but she had enough ingredients to make it for him tonight.
Jungkook was upstairs. He stripped down to his white tank, revealing his well-built, tattooed body.
He smirked at himself in the mirror, satisfied with how much he had grown during his time.
He turned on the shower, adjusting the temperature to his liking before stepping in.
After scrubbing and shaving after what felt like forever, Jungkook hummed to himself as he stepped out the shower, feeling refreshed and anew.
He dried himself up before wrapping the towel around his waist, he stepped into the kitchen where his girl was. “Smells amazing baby, what is it?" He kissed her cheek, leaning on the counter.
“I made a homemade wonton soup with a side of rice.” She smiled, “You look clean. Someone’s already comfy back home.”
Jungkook chuckled, “With everything you’ve done, you made it easy.” He grinned as his stomach growled, looking down at himself.
“Go put some clothes on and dry your hair. You’re gonna get sick. I laid out clothes on the bed.” She instructed. “Use my hairdryer in the bathroom. Should be hung up in the bathroom.”
She took care of him and she tried his best to always pamper him. "Yes ma'am." He smiled, standing up and giving her a soft kiss on the cheek. "I'll be right back, baby."
Jungkook went back to the bathroom and dried his hair then put on the clothes she laid out for him.
He took a look at himself in the mirror and smiled. He had been evaluating their home since he arrived, she had really good taste.
He walked back into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around her waist, kissing her neck and inhaling her scent once more.

Couldn’t get enough.
“So much better huh baby?” She hummed, lost in his embrace.
“Definitely, baby. You always make me better." Jungkook whispered in her ear before giving her a soft and lingering kiss.
He reached for the food she was cooking, but she stopped him. “No. I’ll serve you. Go sit down.”
“Body” He obliged, not able to help it but steal another kiss before sitting down to eat with her. "This smells amazing, love."
She served him his soup along with a cup of jasmine hot tea.
She placed his bowl and cup on his side of the table. She served herself after him, sitting across from him. “Let me know if you like it. Too hot, too cold, too spicy, too salty. Anything like that.”
Jungkook blew on his soup before taking a spoon full, burning his tongue a little bit but he didn't care.
He was just desperate for a home cooked meal.
"This is so fucking good, Y/n… like really fucking good." He glanced up at her, giving her a little smirk before taking another bite.
“I’m not just saying that either.” He munched, lost in the taste of his food.
She laughed, “Glad you’ like it.” She enjoyed her soup across from him.
Jungkook finished his soup, but didn't finish his whole bowl of rice.
He sat back and took a sip of his tea. "So how was your day today? Besides making me the best fucking soup I've ever had?"
“I just spent today prepping for you to get here. Cleaned all day.” She exhaled.
“Was the rice not cooked right? You didn’t finish.” She looked at him, concerned a bit at his action.
Jungkook shook his head. "The rice is fine, love. It's just not my favorite thing to eat."
He took another sip of his tea and reached under the table, squeezing her knee. "It’s all I ever ate when I was in there— not really my favorite at the moment."
“Oh my gosh!” Her eyes widened, “I wasn’t even thinking!”
“Baby you make rice with every meal. It’s like muscle memory for you.” He chuckled. “Don’t worry about it. You’re too cute to worry.”
“It’s my man’s first night home from prison. Of course your opinion matters to me.” She sighed.
Jungkook smiled at her and looked down at his empty bowl. He reached for her hand and glanced back up at her. "You don't have to care about anything when it comes to me. I’m amazed by everything you do.”
“Mm so sweet.” She blushed, “Go relax.” She seized their bowls, washing them in the sink.
Jungkook laughed, "I just want to make sure you're happy too. Wouldn’t want my baby like that in her own house" He stood, slowly making his way around the kitchen island.
He wrapped his arms around her waist and moved his lips to her neck, giving her a soft kiss. "Smell so good baby. Can’t get away from you.”
She blushed at the close proximity, continuing the dishes.
Jungkook pulled away from her neck, his eyes glancing over her face. He enjoyed seeing her blush more than he thought he did.
"What's going on in your head? You can tell me you know." He leaned against the counter, watching her intently.
“Nothing.” She shrugged. “I’m just happy you’re here. More than happy I’m just— thankful.”
She started getting emotional, blinking back tears. “I just thought— I thought you’d have to stay longer.”
Jungkook walked towards her, his finger pushed her chin up, making her look at him.
"Don't cry on me now, damn baby. Making me feel guilty.” He wipes away a tear that fell down her cheek with his thumb. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close.
“Sorry sorry” She apologized, fanning herself.
Jungkook smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead, moving her to clear her teary eyes. "Don't apologize for showing your emotions to me. I love how much you care for me."
“You smell so good too.” She hummed against him. “Better than that nasty fresh out of prison smell.” She laughed.
Jungkook grins, sniffing himself to remind her of the smell she meant, his arms squeezing around her. "If you thought it smelled bad..."
He kisses her cheek, “Imagine when I wasn't this clean for four years.” He teased, laughing.
“Ewww.” She giggled, “I’m okay not thinking about that.”
Jungkook chuckles, pulling back to look at her, cupping her cheek and wiping away loose tears with his thumb. "You're so cute."
He was laughing again. "Y/n, I missed you... I really fucking missed you. I don’t care how many times I told you tonight.”
“I missed you too Jungkook— Writing and calling you definitely isn’t as good as having you here at home with me.” She admitted.
Jungkook smiles, his eyes bright with happiness. "Yeah, I know... I fucking hated the phone. But-" He takes her hand in his.
"Being here now, being able to show up in the morning and see you again and again will make up for it all." He flashes her a wide grin.
“Four years was such a long time.” She groaned, walking out from the kitchen and walking up to their bedroom.
Jungkook nods and follows her, watching her hips sway as his thoughts drift to more primal thoughts.
He felt bad for wanting to get straight to it. But she had been teasing him in those
"It was. But hey-" He says from behind her. He wraps arms around her mid-section. "I'm here now. Should we get to it? Break our bed in together?"
“Oh my gosh you’re so annoying” She smacks his arm, “Go put on a movie while I change. You’re gonna be scrolling for a minute. I’ll be back.”
Jungkook laughs and lets go, jumping onto the bed. He grabbed the remote off the nightstand, surfing through the different streaming services.
He hadn’t seen anything like this in quite some time, but he already knew what he was looking for. She was definitely wrong about him scrolling for a minute.
She changed into a pajama set, being sure to show off a bit by leaving some buttons undone.
She knew what was gonna go down tonight, she just wanted him to wait for it.
She made her way back to the bed, resting her body beside him closely. “What’re we watching?”
“Starting tonight we’re gonna watch every Marvel movie made since I got locked up.”
“Are you serious?” She groaned. “That’s an insane amount of movies.”
“But,” He pouted cutely. “Your baby has been locked up for sooo long.”
“I hate you.”
He wraps arms around her mid-section, resting his head on her waist. "You know you love me, ma... and I sure as fuck love you."
“I love you more” She laughed and pecked his lips, playing with his hair as they watched the first movie together.
Jungkook hums in contentment, closing his eyes and letting her play with his hair.
Throughout the movie, Jungkook couldn’t help but grow more and more desperate.
He was on edge for the past few months. In prison they called and wrote letters but recently her letters had been more
Seductive.
Letters that consisted wordy details of her burning desire and unstoppable urge to have him.
“One more? Please? Last time really.” He pleaded.
“Fine.” She pecked his lips.
A few minutes later.
“Please?”
“Okay.” She pecked his lips.
More minutes go by.
“One more? Last time really.”
“Ugh fine.” She groaned, pecking his lips once more.
“Fuck I can’t take it." He groans as she pecks his lips, unable to help but leaning in and making out with her as their movie plays in the background.
“Don’t know how you expected this to go when you look like this.” He mumbled against her lips, mouth getting messier. “Wanna fuck you so bad.”
“Need to make love to you since you got locked up” Her kisses grew more demanding.
Jungkook flips them over, pinning her down onto the bed and kissing her harder in return. "I needed you to fuckin' kiss me that hard when I was locked up.”
His hips buck up against hers, grinding his hardened cock against her thighs. “Dreamt about this every fuckin’ night.”
“I know baby fuck— me too” She grunted.
Jungkook reaches over to unbutton her pajama pants, before sliding them down her legs slowly— trailing kisses down her thighs as he does. "Take 'em off, baby. I wanna see how fuckin' wet you are for me already."
“Wanted dick since you got locked up— Been wet since you got released.” She couldn’t help the bashful expression all over her.
Yeah?" Jungkook grins, slipping his fingers underneath her panties and teasingly spreading her lower lips, his fingers slipping and teasing over her clit. "And how wet are you actually baby?"
“Fuck” She could cum at the contact alone. “S-So wet.”
Jungkook snickers, slipping a finger deep inside of her and pumping it in and out slowly, moaning at the tight and hot feeling around his fingers. "Fuckin' wet and tight girl hm? Huh baby?"
“F-Feels good daddy” The sensual nickname slipped from her lips, making his ears ring at the sweet sensation of her voice.
Jungkook groans at that nickname, thrusting his finger in and out of her faster now. "Shiiit, baby, you know I love it when you call me that."
He then pulls his fingers out, sucking them clean. “Love the way you taste. Needed that for years.”
“C-Can’t take it” She whimpered at the feeling of his retracting fingers.
Maybe it had been too long for her. By herself it took a good amount of work for her to get off but this was ruining her in seconds.
Jungkook smirks at that, pulling his pants down, his already hard length flopping out. "You’re gonna take it good baby?”
“Daddy please—“
“Is that all you got?" Jungkook taunts, teasing her entrance with his tip. "Beg some more, or you ain't getting this dick."
His dominant and demanding voice was coming back into play, almost better than what she remembered.
“Want it so bad. I’ll take it good, I promise.” Her voice cried, “So desperate.”
Jungkook groans at her begging, slowly pushing inside her. "Mmm fuck— so damn tight, just like that baby.”
“Take Daddy's dick." Him fully entering into her in a slow, but deep pace.
Her chest rose as he slid inside her. She swallowed, adjusting herself to his length.
Jungkook smirks at her reaction, gripping her hips as he begins to thrust in faster, a low moan leaving his lips.
“Missed this wet ass pussy” He stared her down. “You miss that, baby? How Daddy fucks you like this?"
“Y-Yes”
“Fat ol’ ass and huge ass tits— And a pretty face. God, you're so fucking hot." Jungkook grunts, picking up the pace, thrusting harder and faster.
The sound of skin on skin filling the room, making sure to hit that sweet spot. "This what you wanted, huh baby?
“All I-I wanted— all I needed.” She whined out. “Fucking amazing.”
“I thought I was desperate." Jungkook growls, slapping her ass hard. “Such a pretty girl. Didn’t try to play me once.”
The room is filled with even louder wet slaps of his hips against her ass and his smacks. His thrusts becoming more erratic, his cock growing desperate for release.
“All for you, all yours. Been with no one but you.” She moaned, truthfully speaking.
"Good girl." Jungkook leans forward, nipping at her neck before whispering in her ear.
"Say my name, Y/n. Who's dick are you on?" He grips her throat.
“Fuck! Yours Daddy! Yours!” She was a mess on his cock, eyes rolling back.
“That’s my girl. All fucking mine.” He was watching as her body shudders from his touch.
He admired the way she was breaking down in front of him, going dumb on his dick.
The way her body twitched, he knew she was growing closer.
He watched her, clearly enjoying her lack of breath. The way she squirms, his to control and use.
"Gonna cum on daddy’s dick baby? Gonna let go for me?" He's almost there, wanting to finish strong.
“Want your cum— Need it.” She whimpered, eyes growing teary from the overwhelming pleasure. “Please daddy.”
“So fucking hard to say no to you." Jungkook snorts, pounding into her mercilessly. He was seeking his needed high so he could cum right with her.
The couple both reached their orgasms, moaning each other’s names before giving in and cumming together.
“Fuck— so in love with you.” Jungkook grunts, emptily filling her up. He catches his breath, panting with her.
She could hardly get out of the bed because of him, she was limp.
She was shuttering from her orgasm. Her legs were a trembling mess.
He watches her collect herself, loving the sight of her. The way she looks so used and satisfied, only at his hands.
Once she was all together, she got back in bed with him, kissing and chucking with him as the two panted together.
“I still got it.”
“Goddamnit Jungkook.” She hid her face. “Yes- you do.”
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hidden-poet · 8 months
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Commander Snow
Summary; Under the advice of Dr Gaul Coriolanus returns back to district 12 where without blinding light of lucy-grey he could see you.
Warnings; dead dove to do not eat, stalking, unrequited love, breeding kink, violence, possessive!Snow, unco/dubco, sexual content, she/her pronouns, explicit.
chapter one
Chapter two
Chapter three
chapter Four
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You got the shoe back to the grieving mother. Helped her bury it before you got home and rested your tired eyes.
It was over. He let you leave.
But a pestering feeling told you that it wasn't true. That instead you had just painted a target on you back.
You walked to work the next morning with the same feeling. You tried to shake it. Peacekeepers would have knocked down your door last night if he ordered. He wasn't going to grab you now. It was over.
But as you saw you boss guarding the entrance to work, you knew it wasn't.
You tried to pass her anyway. maybe commander Snow had taken the Panems back off her and all she wanted from you was payback.
You reach the bottom of the steps but your boss blocks the entry to your work. Dread pools your stomach. Without this job, you and your mum don't eat.
She was only 5-foot but her fiery personality, and dark features made up for her short frame.
"I never thought you were stupid" she spat.
"I've got to get to work".
She steps forward to stop you, "You already know there's no work here for you".
"Six years I've worked for you. Never turned up late. Never took a day off. And now with a click of his fingers you wanna toss me aside? I never thought you were a coward". You snap back.
In the six years you worked for her you never rose your voice at her. Always gave in to her demands to work late, do something outside of your job description.
"Anyone not a coward to Commander Snow is dead. You're looking to end up the same way".
"Commander Snow!" you heard a voice holler from behind the door. She popped her head out to show Vanessa. She was a pretty girl with long red hair and blue eyes.
"I heard you were receiving parcels from a peacekeeper but from Commander Snow! God. I'd let that man root me for free".
"Get to work" Your boss snaps, and Vanessa disappears behind the screen doors. Her laughter following her.
Now sensing sympathy for her loyal worker, your boss takes the journey down the steps coming up beside you, and placing her hands on your shoulders.
''Can i give you a piece of advice; men love the chase but hate the catch''.
You pull back from her stunned that she would suggest such a thing to you.
"It could be worse" She continues, "Uglier men. Men who take with nothing in return. He could prove to be useful to your survival".
You shake your head no. You had never even flirted before. You were so timid, you needed someone gentle and kind for your first time. Coriolanus Snow was no such man.
Your boss nods back understanding your temperament.
"Maybe he will bore" She tries.
"He will". Your voice was shaky and unsure.
"Good luck until then". Your boss turns from you and walks back up the stairs.
You feel your chest tighten as you turn and walk home. You still had two panams that would keep the house afloat for at least two months on a stingy budget.
But you were unsure how much patience that the commander had. Could he outlast you. Would his infatuation run you dry in time. What then if not?
Your mother wage could cover the rent but not much more. You had a few candles, a few sellable things. But who would buy them for what they were worth. Had Coriolanus got the message to all the community that you were to suffer.
You move past people in the opposite direction going to work as you walked. You kept your head down ashamed until you made it to your gate.
Only the opened letterbox lifted your sprits. You reach in pulling out a thin letter with a re-attached capital seal. Your brother had always been resourceful and smart. The letter would not have even left district 8 if not for the seal.
You peel it off carefully, planning to re-attach it once you had enough money to send the letter back.
The letter itself did nothing for your confidence.
The first line demanded to know why your letter had a capital seal. He called you silly if you stole it, and stupid if you traded for it. He reprimanded you for sending the coins which he sent back. He was fine in district 8 and didn't need any help. You only had one job; look after yourself and look after mum. It seemed to him you were failing, consorting with Peacekeepers. If he was still around he would smack you until you saw sense. Stay away from Peacekeepers and look after yourself, the last line read,
I love you, Archie.
You fold the letter, keeping the coins in your hand. He always knew what to do even if he had no idea about the circumstances. You thumb the place where your ring was suppose to be, wishing you fought harder to keep it.
The door was already unlocked as you reached it and you called out surprised.
"Mum?".
You hear cries coming from her bedroom and you rush to get to her.
"Mum!" you call again.
"Bernard fired me" She sobbed on her bed. You sit on the edge and pat her back.
"Mum, I am so sorry. This is all my fault".
She doesn't deny it but places a warm hand on your knee.
"We're going to be ok. It won't last forever" You console. You were going to beat him at his own game. You could endure, you've been doing it all your life.
"Look what Archie sent" You showed her the coins in you palm. She smiles at you through her tears and you smile back.
You would endure.
He would bore.
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You hold your Saturday market stall using the last of your ingredients.
You had only just started but sold four cakes already. You smile brightly at your customer passing him the brown bag. But he doesn't take it, scurrying off.
The Peacekeeper coming up explains it. He picks up a cake and expects it before throwing it to the ground. Four more peacekeepers come up, and start going through your things.
You stand still with the bag pressed to your chest. You wanted to protest but interfering with peacekeeper work was punishable by whip.
You watch as they turn violent. Throwing over your table and stomping on the baked goods. They kick at your things until they break.
You watch them as he watched you.
You hadn't realized he was there until one of the peacekeepers addressed him asking what was to be done about your money box.
His blue eyes remained on you. "Take it".
All of your days profit and your change was taken.
He stands tall in his commanders uniform, his hat upon his head, and hands in his pocket as the peacekeepers left a mess.
You stare at each other until he calls them off. There was nothing left to destroy. Their time there was now wasted.
He takes a step to you as they went back to the van through the parted audience.
You expected him to say something as he nears but his lips never parted. Instead he takes the brown bag from your hands and follows his men to the van.
You stare at your ruined things but don't cry. It was going to take more than that.
You were going to endure.
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You got some work on the side doing laundry. Your clients underpaid you and you had to deliver in the dead of night, but the supplement income took the pressure off.
You had to rebuild your stall, but now that word got out that Commander Snow had it out for you everything tripled in price. No one was willing to be labeled a traitor by him for the going rate of materials.
Food was also tripled. But you didn't tell your mother that. Choosing to tell her you had a reduced appetite given the circumstances.
You had found a macadamia tree behind a row of houses to pick from. You went late afternoon to avoid being seen as you tried and fill your belly.
You stood there now. Plucking the small nuts off the large tree. You had to climb the base, already have taken the lower hanging offerings. You deshelled some, putting them in a pouch for the walk home.
You had been there for nearly an hour but your basket was only a quarter full. It would take another hour to crack all the nuts out of their shells before you could eat them to your full. Your belly ached at the thought.
"Careful you don't fall". Your foot slipped at the voice.
There was no one around to watch you pick the nuts so no one around to hear you scream.
"What did I just tell you" He scolded.
You look down from the tree to see him staring back. He had you crawling higher up but he caught your foot and tugged you gently down. As you lowered yourself he held the deseeding body part as if he was tugging down on a rope.
First your ankle, then your calf, your thigh, your hip, the your upper arm before finally resting on the side of your neck.
In his other hand he held a capital issued duffle bag, and his fingers curled around an apple.
You push off the tree away from him and he lets you.
"What do you want" You ask.
"I heard you were washing laundry" he threw the duffle bag at your feet, "I'll pay double what everyone else is paying".
"I am booked out" you lied. As the series of events escalated people were too scared to even cheat you of work. You had lost two clients just yesterday.
"a trade then" he smiles and it puts you more on edge, "an apple for 10 minutes of your time".
He holds up the apple in his hand. You eye it hungrily. It was red and large, looking juicy in his hand. But you couldn't bare the thought of spending a minute in his presence let alone 10.
"5 minutes" you try.
He smirks, brining up the apple to his teeth and taking a large bite.
"10" he resolves, chewing the apple.
He could see how hungry you were. Your eyes never leaving the apple.
You nod slowly, walking up and taking the apple from his hand. You retreat as soon as you take it, going back to your place.
"You look tired. Have you been sleeping?".
You were right the apple was juicy and delicious. He waits for your answer, not moving on.
"Hard to sleep when you're hungry". You take another bite of the apple, avoiding where he bit.
'You miss my packages" He said it as more a statement then a question. He said it pridefully as if he was proud that you were starving without him.
"Not even a little bit, Sir". it was the truth. The care packages scared you more then anything.
"I miss my job, I miss my stall".
Your answer perplexed him. His strong features locked, and his body tensed.
"Yes, well self-inflected" he dismissed.
You were finally forced to eat the side he bit and he watched with eager eyes as you did.
"Will you sit?" he gestures to the steps of the old house. There was only three of them but they were long and looked stable.
You do take a seat and he follows you.
Once seated, he places his head on your lap, laying down along the step. It causes you to jump up and he lift his head in an uncomfortable position as his cushion jumped away.
He sits back up on the step and reaches for something in his breast pocket. He pulls out a peanut chocolate candy bar. They were popular in the capital and Tigress thought he might want to try them in her care package she sent.
He had no interest but knew you would.
"Here you want this?" it was wrapped in shiny plastic, "All you have to do is sit and let me rest".
You shook the feeling off and returned to your seat. If he tried anything you could just move again.
You tear open the bar, ripping it in half and putting the remainder in your pocket for your mother.
he rests his head down and lays quietly.
"todays the anniversary of my mothers death. Both her and my sister died in child birth together".
he had wanted some condolences. Maybe for her to stoke his face and tell him to sleep.
But she scoffed at him. "last week was the anniversary of little leo lerman's pa. It will always been the day you hung him".
Little Leo Lerman's pa was a traitor to the capital, his mother was a victim of the war they started.
"I've had a long journey back from the Capital. If you can't be kind, you can be quiet".
"I thought you were away" you comment.
"I went back to the Capital for a few days. Returned this morning".
A funeral for a old academy school mate required him to return home. He had to look in touch with Capital matters. But truth being told, he never cared for the man who died. Couldn't remember even talking to him, only ever speaking over him in class when he gave the wrong answer. He was used once more to make Coriolanus look good.
He was glad to see Tigress and Grandma'am too. They both swooned over commander Snow in his uniform. It was nice to be doted over but still didn't itch the need he had. If anything it only grew it.
He longed to return to you. He had hopped that his effort were enough and he would return to you begging for his forgiveness.
Hearing you now noticing his absence gave him a renewed confidence that you would fold sooner rather than latter.
You had only noticed his absence due to the halting of your suffering. No more being stopped and searched by every peace keeper who crossed your path. The 10pm door knocking to check you were home stopped. People even began to talk to you again. You were beginning to think it was over until moments ago.
You chew on the candy, looking around to see even a shadow of a person.
"I heard a rumor while you were gone that you were a peacekeeper in district 12 before commander".
"Most Commanders are Peacekeepers first."
Your hand clutched the railing ready to pull yourself up. But first your gnawing question had to be answered.
"And that while you were a peacekeeper you ran about with a girl named Lucy-grey". His eyes shoot open upon her name. dead and still ruining his life.
"Expect Lucy-grey went missing, and no one's heard from her since".
He sits up and leans against his knees, "It's just a rumor".
You jump back to your feet now the weight of him was off you. Getting as much distance as you can. He reaction confirmed it for you.
"I don't want to disappear" you admit, your eyes tearing up. Your family would never recover. Especially your brother.
He gets up with you, closing the space you created and taking your face into his hands despite your struggle against him.
"And you won't, okay. I never even knew Lucy-grey".
He was going to find whoever told you about her and string them up.
He could see the panic in your eyes, and he wanted to stamp it out.
"It's just a district rumor" he consoles.
The look in his eyes told you the truth.
"No it ain't".
You pull free from him, grabbing you basket as he stood frozen.
"i owe you an apple". You try and move past him, unable to spend any more time in his presence but he grabs your arm and flings you back into the macadamia tree.
You gasp as you make impact. It was a beautiful sound to Coriolanus's ears. He would have enjoyed it if he hadn't been so angry.
"Who do you think you are walking away from me?" his hands reach your throat applying pressure. It wasn't enough to cut your air supply completely off but it was enough to make it difficult to breathe.
You struggle underneath him, trying to push him off.
"I am Commander Snow, you are district scum. You think i am going to let district scum treat me this way?"
His hold tightens as he shakes you a little bit.
"Are you mad? bringing up lucy-grey. mocking the death of my mother."
this was not his sweet girl that plagued his mind.
"Get off me!" you scream at him with all the breath you had left.
His hand comes down. One-two-three times across your face. Tears fill your eyes from the stinging sensation but he doesn't relent.
This was the man who ruled district 12. He wouldn't have to make you disappear he could just leave your body were it laid.
Your hand reaches out, touching his neck and it stilled him from his rage.
"Stop" you beg, "I am sorry. I didn't mean to".
You feel his fingers loosen from your neck, and you take gasps of air while you can.
"I am sorry" you say again and his hands rest on your collar bone rather then your neck.
He lifts one hand up stoking your cheek,
"That bruise will never heal if you keep this up".
"I know". You wrap your hands around his wrist. He seems receptive to your touch.
Keeping his hands on your collar bone he rests his forehead on you.
You needed to get away from him. His temper flared so quickly, you were sure to make a mistake that would lead to his hands reaching for your neck again.
If codling kept him kind then you were going to lay it on thick until you were back to safety.
You rub his back like he was a child, while your other arm laid across his shoulders.
He presses further into you, moving his hands so there wrapped around your waist.
It looked like a lovers embrace but you felt like a mouse in the mouth of a snake.
Commander Snow was a mummy's boy, you learnt. It seemed logical that he was trying to replace the hole she left.
"Can you walk me home?" you ask. The walk home was nearly 15 minutes but you knew of you tried to leave without him again, his anger would flare back up.
You feel his nose rubbing your skin as he nods but he doesn't move.
"come on" You urge pushing against him. He straightens, heaving off you and picking up the basket you dropped and the duffle bag he threw.
He held out his hand to you, and you take it without hesitation.
You walk behind the houses to avoid being seen together. He leads and you trail slowly behind him.
Your eyes drop with tears from the pain of your cheek. He only notices when you snuffle.
It halts him in his tracks. He turns to you, wiggling his hand free and wiping away your tears.
"Hey, I am not angry anymore" he consoles.
You nod your head, taking his hand back in yours and coaxing him forward again. You were almost home. Just a few more meters.
Night had just begin to overtake the sky as you saw your house come into view. You let go of Coriolanus hand and press yourself against a neighbors house as man covered in coal returns from work.
You had expected that he would leave you at the gate but he continues past it, staying just behind you as you reach the steps of your house.
"Thank you for walking me home, Commander". You reach for your basket but he keeps it out of your grip.
"I'll bring it in side for you".
You freeze at his words. The last thing you want is for him to enter your home were he would be given free reign to do what he wanted behind closed doors. At least out in the open you had a chance of a good Samaritan coming to your aid.
But you couldn't tell him that.
You nod instead. Unlocking your door you turn to him.
"Could you check the mail for me?"
His hand touches your elbow as he turns, "Of course".
You wait for him to open the empty mail box at the end of your house before you rush inside. Locking the door behind you. You double check the windows on the side, ensuring they are well secured.
He heard the door slam and turned back up the drive. He tries the door nob to see it locked. If he was upset he didn't show it, keeping his face emotionless.
He walks to the window where you stood, eyeing you through the glass.
"vanessa lives by the lake. House 1-02" He begins to eat the de-shelled macadamias that you planned to have for dinner.
"she's very pretty and less troublesome then me. You'll like her".
He smiles a tight smile, no longer looking at you he turns, tipping your basket as he walks back to the gate. You would pick the nuts up later for dinner.
You felt as if you won watching him walk away. You bested him today.
But he didn't want Vanessa, he wanted you.
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No one was willing to have their clothes washed by you. He must have figured out your clients, and scared them into submission.
With the loss of income, you were forced to use your savings that were fleeting fast with the rising prices.
The macadamia tree was no more. He had cut it down to a stump the next day. You only had a small basket left to last you.
Your mother was depressed by the isolation of the community. She rarely left the house, unable to beg for a job any longer.
You tired to lift her spirt by using the last of your flour to make her a small cupcake. You surprised her with it after dinner.
She hadn't even taken a bite before the sound of a van pulling up was heard. You both froze waiting for what was next.
Peacekeepers knocked down the door, coming in full force in a single file.
One grabs you and pushes you against the wall while the others tear apart your house. You feel his hands upon you as he searches for valuables upon your body.
Your mother is subjected to the same treatment by another.
A tight hold on your neck kept you from turning but you could hear the house being turned over. Crashing sounds could be heard from every direction. Smashes from things being broken, sounds of cheering as they found something valuable.
One had taken your mums silver necklace that was gifted by your dad just before he died. She had beg the Peacekeeper to leave it but you knew their orders were to reek havoc.
Breaking up the sound of looting was a drill. You could see out of the corner of your eye that a peacekeeper was taking your door.
You yelled but it was drowned out by the sound.
Once it was off its hinges, the peacekeepers released you and your mum, beginning to return to their truck with the door and your valuables.
You rush to your bedroom, falling to your knees seeing that the loose floor board panels that you hid your savings under was opened.
You and your mum were officially destitute.
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The open door way let the cold air and bugs in. You had put up a old blanket but it did little.
It also didn't offer you any protection from unwanted visitors.
Coriolanus walked right past the blanket into your home. You shoot up from the table. Standing in front of the hallway to block him from going any further into your home.
"what are you doing here"
"I came to see if you had changed your mind about apologizing. I thought coming to the compound might have been a little scary for you".
He takes a step forward coming across to you. His head turns as he examines the damage his peacekeepers did.
"i want my door back" you demanded.
"I want my apology". He continues to you
"an apology for what? look at my house". He backs you into the wall
"an apology for treating me so cruelly".
"get out" you demanded.
"Are you sure you want to do this? It doesn't have to be this way".
"get out of my house" you repeat.
He places a hand on the wall next to you, leaning in. You feel his hand on caressing your cheek.
"you showed me the other day what a sweet girl you can be. Must i wring it from you?".
You think about shouting for your mother. She took to lying down in her bed to starve off the cold. But you worried for her safety if you did.
His stoking hand stopped, bracing itself against the side of your face.
He leans his head closer, his lips brushing yours. You knew what was coming next, and tried to move your head out of the line of attack.
He takes a stronger hold on your chin to keep you in place, and kisses you with the same hunger as the night against the wall.
He comes back for more before he had fully pull apart his lips from yours.
'Commander Snow". Your mother voice broke his kiss, and he turns to see her in the living room.
"Ma'am" he greets.
He doesn't move from you, unashamed as your mother glares down at him.
"What an honor it is to have you in our home" She pulls out a chair at the kitchen table for him. One of three that didn't break. "Can i offer you some water".
"No thank you, Ma'am. I just came to check on your daughter".
"As you can see, she's fine. Thank you, Sir". Your mother walks to the door way, holding up the blanket, " If anything changes I will be sure to let you know. So there's no need to come back down. We would hate to keep you from your important duties".
Commander Snow scoffs at the women. She was a bad influence on you.
He turns back to you and places a quick, deep kiss on your lips before following his directions to the door.
"No trouble at all. I'll be back to ensure the safety of you both" he pins your mother under his stare as he spoke, "District 12 is a dangerous place".
"Good night, Commander" your mother voice wavers.
"Ma'am" he nods in her direction and disappears behind the sheet.
Your mother rushes to you once he goes, pulling you into her arms. You were too frozen to hug back.
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You knew your mother was going to pay for her interference.
But as peacekeepers invaded your house once more and dragged her down the road. You had no idea what awaited her.
You shout at them to get off her. Hitting and pulling the Peacekeeper that had her.
People come out from their houses at the noise. Watching as the women is pulled to the town center with her daughter carrying on behind her.
You feel arms secure you to a chest and you turn expecting to see Coriolanus giving you an out only to find a faceless peacekeeper.
You beg him to let your mother go but he continues silently, pushing you along.
You watch as they lock her on the whipping post.
"Commander Snow" you yell out for the only man who could stop this but he was no where to be found, "Commander Snow".
You scream as the whip came down upon your mother.
The cries of your mother will forever be engrained in your brain. You stood helpless as you watched her be whipped unconscious. Only then was she unlocked from the post and the peacekeepers moved the crowd on.
You rushed to her as the Peacekeeper released you. You cradled her head in your lap. it was you who should have been whipped. You wished you could have taken it for her. But he knew the only way to hurt you was to hurt the people you loved.
Your friend, Lydia saw the ordeal and helped you get your mother back to the house. You didn't have anything that could help her. The best you could do was clean the blood with water which caused her to wake from the pain and put her to bed.
"it's my fault, Lydia" you cry reaching out to hold her but she retreats from you.
"I am so sorry. I can't be seen with you". she rushes back to the entry way, "I shouldn't have even helped with your mother".
You fall to your knees as you watch her leave. You were utterly alone.
Your mother is bed ridden from the pain. Unable to eat or sleep. Two nights later, you receive a letter from him. In it was two small bottles of morphling.
I have what you need. Come see me
-C
The note read.
You rush to your mother giving her the small bottle. It worked instantly to relieve her pain. You stroke her head as she sleeps.
You remember what your boss has said; men love the chase but hate the catch.
Perhaps if you let him take what he wanted it would mark the end of this torture. You wouldn't be the first women to loose your virginity to a peacekeeper. the consequences weren't worth the effort in keeping it.
Your pride lumped itself in your throat, and you forced yourself to swallow it.
The next morning you gave your mother her breakfast and second dose of morphling before rushing over to your bosses house. You knew she was the only one who would see you.
She doesn't allow you in but greets you on the front porch.
"Have you come to your senses?" she asks.
"He whipped my mother"
"I heard. What do you plan to do about it?".
"The only thing I can" your voice was low and soft but she heard you.
"What do you need?"
"Two cups of sugar and a cup of flour".
She goes back inside and returns with your request. You could feel her neighbors staring out at you from their windows.
She comes down to the steps to where you stood and you take the whole pouches of ingredients.
"Thank you", Your boss was not known for being generous.
"When he is done, come round and i'll pour you a drink".
You nod your head unable to form a thought.
"Oh and Y/N, relax. It will hurt less the less you fight it".
She offers a comforting hand on your back, but you shake it off quickly to return home.
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You make a batch of brownies with the ingredients.
You give a small patch to your mother and box the rest up in your basket.
You had showered and prepared yourself. Putting on your nicest dress, a soft blue one that ties into a bow in middle of your back. You borrow your mother worn black high heels, and brush your hair a hundred times.
You feel your pride bubble back in your throat as you reach the compound. You have to push it back down to give the guarding peacekeeper your name.
He repeats it into his communicator and the gate swings open.
You follow the guard to the well known building to see Coriolanus waiting at the bottom step.
He dismisses the Peacekeeper as he takes your basket from you and places a hand on your back.
"Thank you for seeing me, Commander". You talk to him as he leads you to his office.
"I was going to visit tonight. Is everything ok?"
You stare at him. He was so detached from his actions.
"I wanted to apologize for my behavior".
You reach his large oak doors, which he opens for you.
"i am glad to hear it" he follows you in.
"Are these for me?" he asks looking through your basket.
"yes'' you answer.
He pulls out one of the chairs for you to sit in, choosing to lean against the desk as he eats the brownie.
"These are good" he praises, taking another bite.
"I used the macadamias".
He reaches into the basket and offers you one. You decline it.
"I don't think i could ever eat another one. It took a hundred just to keep me semi full".
He nods in understanding, putting it back. He leans forward over you as he speaks.
"one time during the war, I ate a whole jar of paste just to stop the pain in my stomach".
"that must have been awful".
he feels his heart lurch at her words. Finally sympathy. How he longed for it. For someone to care about his suffering.
But he tried to remain nonchalant. Not wanting her to think he was weak.
He shrugs his shoulders, "it was a long time ago".
He brushes his hand together, clasping them shut on his lap.
"So your apology. Lets hear it".
You thought you already had done it with the brownies but he wanted you to grovel some more.
That pesky pride bounces in your chest. But no, you wouldn't let it interfere. Your mother needed the morphling not only for the pain relief but to warn off infection.
"Commander Snow I-"
"Coriolanus" He interrupts.
"Coriolanus" you start again, "I don't know what came over me".
You don't look him in the eyes, keeping your eyes on his shiny shoes. You can't. But you can feel him looking at you.
"My actions are not reflective of the respect I hold for the capital".
The flex of his shoe tells you that he was unpleased with you apology.
"Or you". Yes, the shoe pointed back down. He wanted the focus on him.
"If you can find it in your heart to forgive me. I would never repeat my actions again. You would have my undivided loyalty for your kindness".
He stands up going to his desk chair and folding his hands on top. You eyes rise to watch him. You half expect him to pick up the phone and call a peacekeeper in.
"If you are after my forgiveness you have it. But if you are after my services there are no longer free".
You press your legs together and repeat your mantra; men love the chase but hate the catch.
It was time to be caught. You rise from your chair to stand in front of him. He angles his chair to face you. His legs brush against yours.
"My mother needs morphling". Would it be hint enough.
It seemed to be as he places his hand on your hip.
"And what do you need?". He tugs you down with his hold on your hip and you land awkwardly between his legs. You hold yourself up on the arm of his chair.
"Morphling," you answer. You face was inches away from his. The closest you've ever been without his hands wrapped around your neck.
"Maybe to not have to eat macadamias again?"
His smile throws you off guard. You find yourself dazzled by his straight white teeth poking out behind his plump lips.
"A new dress perhaps?". His hand goes to its favorite place on the side of your face and you can feel his thumb moving back and forth.
"Morphling" you repeat and it earns a laugh from him.
He loved that your needs came second to everyone else's. To his.
"Okay, morphling," he laughs, "What are you willing to trade for morphling? It's not easy to come by".
"Anything". This was it. You would loose you virgnity on the floor of the Commanders office for a case of morphling.
"hm" he muses. He picks up your right hand from the arm of the chair and wraps it around his neck. It throws you off balance.
"How about dinner?". You look at him. Maybe the floor didn't suit a man of his stature. Too animalistic.
"Where?". Did he want to go to a backroom of the hob?
"Your place".
"Tonight?". You had nothing to cook.
"Tomorrow". You still doubted your ability to find something. You doubt your boss would extend her kindness anymore, and all your friends had deserted you until it all blew over.
"do you like macadamias?". You think you still had a handful left. Did it matter. He wasn't truly coming to eat.
"They taste like paste in my mouth", he leans forward and presses a button asking someone to bring in the box.
"I'll be there around 6:30. Keep your mother in the backroom. I don't think she likes me very much".
"She can't even get out of bed" you admit.
He reaches into his draw, pulling out two small bottles of morphling.
"These won't help that but will ease the pain".
You take them fast. "Thank you".
"They aren't free. You owe me".
You jump as you hear the door open. Getting off him, just in time for a women in grey to enter with a small box. Coriolanus remains in a relaxed position in his chair.
"Commander" she greets as she places the box on the table and walks away. You peer into the box to see a small lot of vegetables, a bag of apples, two pears and a small bundle of meat wrapped up in parchment.
"For dinner tomorrow night".
He gets up from his chair taking the box with him, and directs you to the door with a hand on your shoulder.
"Now as much as I have loved seeing you. I have to get to a meeting, and you have to get home".
He leads you back through the building and down the steps to were peacekeepers were loading up into their van for night patrolling.
You buck against him as he pushes you to the van. You felt safer making your own way home.
They salute him, halting their process.
"14 Cherry lane", he nods in your direction. A young peacekeeper nods back.
He places the box on the floor of the van so he had two hands to lift you up. You protest telling him you could get home yourself but you were grabbed by a series of hands and placed on the bench
The men stood, hanging on to the material of the roof to avoid sitting down next to you. You felt safer at least knowing that they were too sacred of Coriolanus to touch you.
The leader of the group, dressed in smarter uniform comes to Coriolanus and confirms it will be done with a salute. Coriolanus pays him no mind, handing the box back up to you.
Two Peacekeepers lock the gate in and the van takes off. Coriolanus watches it go, and you watch him get smaller and smaller as you pass the boundary out of the compound.
The van ride is bumpy and silent. The men look out for protentional danger and you look out for familiar landmarks to track how far you were off.
You see a large red sign that marks the beginning of your neighborhood.
"wait, just here, please" the sound of the van would have the neighborhood looking out the window, and after tonight the judgemental looks of your negibours would be too much to bear.
The driver pulls over and the same peacekeepers unlock the gate for you. As soon as you jump out the van takes back off and your grateful for the darkness that covers you.
You walk back in your uncomfortable high heals. They snag every rock as you walk, and your ankle twists so many times you loose count.
Tomorrow night he would come, and it would all be over.
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The next morning Peacekeepers come and reinstall your door. It was a welcomes surprised that earnt a few head nods from your community. It was a mark of the end. Things were returning to normal.
The new door even allowed you to trade the two pears for some pastry and 2 eggs. People were no longer afraid to do business with you.
You spend the rest of the day baking an apple pie for desert, tending to your mother who could now eat and bathe without pain, and tiding up the house for your visitor tonight.
You hopped he would bring more morphling. Your mother woke screaming in pain as a bird entered the house without the door and landed on her back. You had to give her the second bottle to ease her. But it left her dry for tonight.
Extra food would be nice too. The box only really fed a meal for two, and he had expected you to prepare dinner for him tonight with it.
You had thought about feeding your mother first and leaving a plate for him. But knew it would upset him. Dinner involved two people eating together. Instead you would only take small bites until he finished his meal and give the rest to you mother once he leaves.
You wouldn't be able to eat much with the anxiety in your belly anyway. But you assured yourself it would be fine.
He would come and take. And tomorrow morning you would go to work, and then your mothers work to earn both wages. With that and a tightened budget you could afford black market morphling, until that too was just a bad memory.
5 o'clock comes and you busy yourself with cooking and cleaning. When that was finished you dressed yourself back in your best dress and mothers shoes. Your feet cried as the shoes pressed down on the sores they made.
You stare at the clock until it hits 6:30. he didn't appear out of thin air. You wait at the table still.
It hits 6:31 and you think maybe he changed his mind. But a hard knock at the door tells you he hadn't.
You don't keep him waiting. he was an impatient man, and you also didn't want people to see him on your porch.
You yank open the door to see him standing tall in his official uniform and another small box in his hands. His smell hit you instantly. It was fresh and masculine. It was the first time you didn't hold your breathe around him, and his smell invades your nose.
Checking behind him for a peacekeeper van, you found none. Did he walk here, you wondered. But there wasn't a drop of sweat on him. It was unlikely.
"Hello" He greets.
You step back to let him in. He juggles the box in one hand while the other closes the door behind him.
'Hi" you return half-heartedly.
He offers you the box and you take it to the kitchen. He follows you like a lost dog, never allowing more then an inch between you as you walk.
'Dinner's ready. If you're hungry". You look through the box digging for the morphling, but disappointment fills you as you fail to find it.
"Starving" he responds.
He turns you towards him by your hips and smashes his lips down upon yours. he is a needy kisser, trapping your bottom lip between his teeth to stop you from moving before returning to your top lip to restart the kiss.
He pulls way breathless.
'For the morphling, yesterday" He justifies with a peck to your cheek.
What about the morphling, today, you wanted to ask but you weren't sure how he would respond to the question.
Instead you tell him to take a seat at the table and you would bring it out to him.
He sits as he is told. You set two places across from each other. One with their back to the wall leaving the other to face back from the door. Coriolanus takes a seat at the one facing the door. It allowed him to watch you in the kitchen as you plate the food.
He drags the other place mat across the table and seats it next to his. Traditional face to face dinning would not do tonight.
You come over with the plates, noticing the new arrangement. You go with it. Tonight would be about what he wanted.
"It smells amazing. Thank you". He praises.
You smile a tight smile at him. Unable to form words. Your mother would wake soon in a great deal of pain.
he watches you take small bites of your food while he demolishes his.
Your feet ache under the table, the shoes pressing hard into you. You slip the backs off, letting your heels rest on top.
The air carried a awkward silence. He was eating his food while eyeing you. You could tell he was trying to figure out why you chose to spend ten minutes eating a single potato. He knew how hungry you must be.
You needed to keep him focused on himself.
"I didn't hear a van. Did you walk?". You ask. You push your food to the side to make it look like there was an empty space on your plate.
"I parked it in the woods behind. I heard you asked to be dropped off before your stop last night. Figured you didn't want the attention".
"Thank you" you say earnestly.
"You know" he places some stake into his mouth, "people are going to know about us. Most already do".
Us. There was no us. It was commander Snow and a district girl. Entirely separate.
"you're my girl. People should know it".
Your eyes shoot up to his. No. he was going to catch and release.
"the people here-" you start.
"If some one gives you a hard time, you write their name on a piece of paper for me".
You would never do that. You felt your anger flare up and you stomp it down. The door was closed and your mother was injured. No one would come to your aid if you did something stupid.
"Okay?" He presses.
You nod your head in tune to your mothers crying.
Your head snaps back to the bedroom, and then back to Snow.
he made no offer of morphling, as he ate. You wondered how he could stomach it hearing another person cry out.
"Commander Snow".
You were going to ask, saying no wasn't the worse thing he could do but you were desperate.
"Coriolanus. You can call me Coriolanus in private". He wipes his mouth from his dinner with a handkerchief.
You couldn't call him Coriolanus. It was too familiar. So you just continued your sentence.
"I am very grateful for the food that you brought".
Your sentence filled his eyes with light.
"But" they darken at your ongoing, "I was wondering about the morphling that was promised".
"You think you deserve morphling? I told you favor has to be earnt".
Your mother cries out again, calling out for you.
"How would I earn morphling?" here it was his proposition.
"You could try being nicer to me".
You hands ball in frustration. Just say what you want, you begged, You couldn't be the one to offer it.
"I will. I will be nicer, but could I have the morphling now and then we can go to my bedroom?".
"Why would we do that?"
"Please!" you grunt, lunching onto his arm.
"You think I want to fuck you?".
You mother screams for you to come to her and you dig your nails into his uniform.
'You don't?" what the hell was this all for.
"Not until I get back to the Capital".
You lurch up, holding out you hand.
"Coriolanus please"
"who's to say I brought it?".
You knew he did.
''You're welcome to check". He grins, holding out his arms for a pat down.
A sob from your mother had your hands roaming his uniform. Pressing over his arms, and chest for small pockets that he could hide them in.
You pressed against nothing but soft flesh. You go to his uniform belt that was tight around his waist, checking the small compartments built in. He had taken off his hand gun but his handcuffs were still linked over his belt.
He takes hold of the back of your neck tugging you closer so he could brush his teeth against your throat. He kissed and bit as he pleases while you continued to search.
You shake you head at him, trying to keep you throat from his mouth but his hold tightens, going up to your hair.
You pat along his torso. The Commander peacekeeper uniform was intricate there could be a secret compartment anywhere.
When you get to his pant pocket you feel the shape of the small bottle. You dig into his pocket and he catches your wrist.
You tug back but don't make it far. You beg him to release you. You had found the bottle. You had won.
Your mother calls out for you again and he does release you. Letting you go to her.
You run down the hallway to her bedroom. falling to your knees beside her and uncapping the bottle.
"here" you bring it up to her lips but she doesn't take it.
"is he here" .The darkness of the room covers bites on your neck but she still eyes them like she can see them.
"No, mama. No one is here. Drink".
You tilt the bottle to her lips and she sucks it down hungrily. Her eyes droop as she rests her head back on her pillow. You stoke her hair until they close fully.
You couldn't let you emotions get the better of you. You just had to grin and bare it until he leaves. But now he has left you confused. He told you he didn't want to sleep with you until he's back in the Capital.
You thought you knew what tonight was going to hold but now everything is up in the air. Still, at least you knew he had plans to return to the Capital. You wouldn't have to endure him forever.
He could continue the morphling supply. That would save you having to consort with rebels. If you could avoid making him mad.
With your mother asleep you return to the living room where Coriolanus had started to eat your mothers dinner. If she won out in your attention, she lost out on dinner.
You clear you throat, "Thank you".
He looked pissed in his chair, and you were eager to return him to a good mood.
You clear the empty dinner plates from the table,
"Would you like some desert? I baked apple pie just for you".
He liked being center of attention and you would give him special treatment tonight.
He notices your pained walk to the kitchen. The way your knee slightly buckled as you put weight on your left foot. When you reached for the powered sugar in the top shelf, your foot rose from the heal and he could see the redness from where it rubbed.
You pat the sugar on top of the slice of the apple pie and bring it back over to him at a slow pace.
You place it in front of him. You didn't cut a piece for yourself, your throat hurt from bites.
Still he looked unhappy and you worried as he pushed the bowl away from him, and took you into his arm.
With his chair scraped back he positioned you in front of him, shoving you into a sitting position on top of the table.
His hands trailed down to your shoes, and he took them off, rubbing your sore heals. He knew what it was like to wear shoes that were too small.
He sat rubbing your sore feet, you slightly pull away as his strong hands dug into separated skin.
"What about your desert?" You asked. You had planned to try and send him on his way as soon as he ate it.
You strong finger latched themselves around your ankle and threw it over his shoulder. His other hand pushed your dress up around your hips.
You push his shoulders back as his head came between you thighs.
"you said you wouldn't" you squabble.
"I said I wouldn't fuck you. I didn't say we couldn't do other fun things".
His fingers find their way to your panties and he pulls them off, pocketing them.
"Lay down" he demanded, "i have some more morphling if you're good".
You lay flat against your dinner table and squeeze your eyes shut.
he takes both your knees and hooks them over his broad shoulder, pulling you closer to his mouth.
Your body jolts as he lays his lips across your center. Sucking as if it were a juicy stone fruit. You could feel your own wetness and you felt ashamed. But as your boss had said, there were uglier men out there.
As his first lick lands your hand shot out to his head. If he still had his curls you would have grabbed them but you clutched at air.
He laps and sucks hungrily as you wiggle beneath him. You bite back soft moans. This had never been done to you before, and you had no idea you could feel so good.
You could feel him as he spelt out his name with his tongue. C-the O had your hips bucking-R-I- another hard O and a sound crawled its way from your throat- L-A-N-U- he sucked as he finished the S.
You felt his teeth graze your pearl, giving you a second of pain before he went down and started to poke at your entrance.
He was slow and lazy as he ate you out, keeping your thighs in a strong hold. It felt your stomach form knots as he went up and down. Never letting you fully build from one spot.
You could hear him slurping and moaning as he worked. You tried your best to keep quiet. Not wanting to give him the satisfaction of knowing it felt good.
But as you came undone, the orgasm that ripples through you demanded to be known. You hand claws at your own face unsure of what to do while the other clamped down on Coriolanus hand on your thighs.
He added his thumb from his spare hand to your pearl and massaged you through your organism. The over stimulation was too much and you kicked at him to release you.
"Just feel it" he ordered.
You did and it left you spent on table.
"Good girl. You took it well". He tugged you down from the table to the floor beneath him where you sunk.
He undid he belt and you guessed it was his turn.
"Hold out your tongue". You did as he asked poking out your tongue to him.
He freed himself just enough to release his throbbing cock. It stood upright begging for attention. You thought it was going to look scarier, but it could have been your own arousal that soften the member.
He grips your chin, pulling down so your mouth was open as he slowly stokes himself over you.
"Kiss it" he challenged.
You press a soft kiss to his tip and he shudders. Was this all it took for the great commander Snow to crumble.
"Take it" he breathed, "Just the tip".
You take just the first part into your mouth, and he reaches down for your hand. You give it to him and he places it around his cock. He moves your hand for you back and forth.
"Get off" he barks but keeps his hand pressed tightly around yours. You take his mouth off him, and watch as he pumps himself with your hand.
You watch him with his head thrown back and eyes closed. You could see his quick breathes passing through his tummy.
He looks down, seemingly irritated by you, he grabs your hair and yanks it back.
"Open" was the only word he could get out.
You resume your position of sticking your tongue out with your mouth open and he goes back to his state of pleasure.
"That's it, baby" he moans, "like that. Yeah".
His hand over yours quickens and you can see him clutching the arm of the chair.
"Fuck, baby" he says as his milk spills out of him.
The salty taste hits your tongue making you instantly close your mouth. It goes all over the floor and your best dress. Your mothers terrible shoes were safe through.
With his claw still in the back of your head, he maneuvers you out of the way as he bends down and scoops some of his cum off the floor.
He pushes it back into your mouth, through your teeth.
"taste me, baby".
He lets you get up after his fingers are clean. You both straighten out your dress wear. He kicks your chair out for you and you take it. Slumping into it, feeling sick.
He reaches for his pie, taking a bite. He groans in appreciation of its taste. Digging his spoon back for more, he lift it to you.
You stare at him dazed before you eat from his spoon, wanting nothing more then to get the taste of him out of your mouth.
He leaves later on with a kiss goodnight and two more bottles of morphling. Enough to last you until tomorrow night. Where you expected to see him and earn some more.
--------
taglist; @namelesslosers @urfavnoirette
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robynlilyblack · 2 years
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Always little wolf
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Fred Weasley x wolfstars daughter! reader
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Summary: While y/n and Fred walk home in the snow, the simplest conversation makes Fred sure of one thing, he's going to marry that girl
Warnings: established relationship, kinda luna lovegood type reader, reader loves random facts, kissing, so much fluff, one proofread
A/n: 0.7k words, day 4 we have another fluffy little blurb with freddie and wolfstars adopted daughter, enjoy xx
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Navigation | Fred Weasley Masterlist
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“Did you know…”
Fred’s already chuckling, the sight of you trying to get on your big fluffy coat whilst tipsy was cute enough, but combine it with an excited random fact? You have his heart melting like crazy. He was used to your random trivia but never grew tired of it, he loved it in fact, especially as it hardly ever related to anything you were doing.
Like when he first met you, you had tagged along with Harry and his dad, your godfather, James, to the quidditch world cup, instead of a 'did you know this about quidditch fact' whilst you walked up the stands with him him, he got a 'did you know otters hold hands while sleeping so they don’t float away from one another?'
It was safe to say he had been at your mercy ever since
"...that...one second...that s-"
“Here…” he gently interrupts your fact before you can start, helping you get your hand through the sleeve “...good girl” he pecks your forehead, adoring the the grin he receives as you cheese up at him, eyes glassy, clearly only half here but the love in your eyes shines through
After one last shout goodbye to those at the party you and Fred brave the cold, his hand finding yours before guiding into his larger pocket to keep it warm
“It’s snowing” you note, free hand coming to wrap around his bicep, as your cheek presses into it
“It is...almost as pretty as you my love” he flirts, adoring your giggle before you let out a little yip, head shooting up to look at him as you move away slightly to smile up at him “What?”
“I forgot to tell you the fact” you say softly and his heart warms, secretly glad you remembered
“Hit me” he flashes you a goofy grin, unable to hold it back as he wraps his arm around you and leads you down the now snow dusted path
“Did you know that Scotland's national animal is a unicorn because there was this wizard whose pet unicorn followed him into a muggle battle?” you say, a little slurred and in a higher pitched tone, the same one you always used when saying your little facts  
Fred chuckles, pulling you a little closer into his side “Seriously?” 
“Siriusly” you start giggling 
“See this is the stuff Binns should have taught us…” Fred shakes his head “...actually you know what lovely? You should try and poach his job” he presses a kiss to your hat clad temple 
“Nah” you shake your head 
“Why not? You love facts, adorable at telling them, cute as a button so all the guys and gals will crush on you, be closer to your dads and uncle” he lists with a shrug, genuinely surprised you wouldn’t be interested
You stop walking, gently removing yourself from Fred's grip and taking his hands in yours instead. His eyebrows pinch but his face soon softens into a smile as he sees you shining up at him 
“Because then I wouldn’t see my favourite person everyday...” you answer simply, easily, almost like it should have been obvious but the next bit floors him "...and when I find out a new fact I can't tell anyone else until i've told you, I always tell you first"
He always felt it in his heart that he was going to marry you one day, but this was the moment he knew for sure...so much that in less than a weeks time you would be saying that three letter word to make it a reality
“Merlin I love you...” the words tumble out breathlessly in the same manor as yours "...so much...so...so much" he emphasises squeezing your hands
Your smile widens at that, a giggle escaping as you step forward, chests grazing “Ditto” you shine, placing a sweet kiss to his nose
He doesn’t let you pull away fully, instead dips down to capture your lips, hands slipping out of yours to cup your chilled cheeks while the snow lightens around you for a moment, large flakes fluttering down slowly like you were in some movie. The cold forgotten for a moment as your warm lips dance with one another, your hands gliding up to find his chest, not caring that it made your fingertips go numb
Your lips still ghost the others as you break away, your cheeks rising with your smile in his light grip as you whisper “Did you know if you remind yourself you aren’t a fish your hiccups will stop?” 
“You're pulling my leg” he whispers back
“Wanna bet Weasley?” you say letting your lips meet again tentatively
“With you? Always little wolf”
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Thank you for reading ♡
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queerweewoo · 3 months
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“Shit.” 
Eddie mutters the curse under his breath when he can't seem to release the clasp on his St. Christopher chain.
He'd plopped himself down next to Buck after arriving home from dropping off his fourteen-year-old budding socialite at a friend's house, having already kicked off his boots and hooking an arm around Buck's still crossed-at-the-ankle legs, getting comfy with them resting over his lap—well, his lap and the arm of the sofa, because Buck has the longest pair of pins in the whole frickin world.
“Nope, I'm afraid shit can't possibly be the answer to seven down, Eddie, because even though it starts with an ‘S’, and the third letter is definitely an ‘I’, twelve across has got to be 'Skating', which would make the second letter a ‘K’,” Buck says with mock-seriousness as Eddie is still attempting to take off his chain. “And anyways, I don't really think the answer to the clue ‘Dermis’ could legitimately be shit, not by any stretch of the imagination; ‘Dermis’ sounds too… I dunno. Scientific? Medical?”
Eddie snorts his amusement at Buck, and Buck grins back at him with that particular twinkle in his eye that Eddie has come to think of as belonging to him.
He really tries his best not to be possessive over his best friend, knows he has no right to anything like that, but Eddie can't help being in love with Buck, no matter how much he wishes he wasn't.
Eddie's been fighting his desires his entire life, regardless of the fact he knows there isn't a damn thing wrong with being gay. But growing up in Texas, with a family as traditional as his own? It means Eddie hasn't ever felt entitled to getting the things he wants in life.
Buck must notice Eddie struggling, then, because he immediately drops his pen and the crossword puzzle book Eddie picked up for him yesterday at the newspaper stand near the firehouse, and is now swinging his legs off the sofa so he can scooch further up to Eddie, until he's almost on top of Eddie, and is saying, “Here, let me get that for you, Eds.”
Eddie freezes.
He knows he should shoo Buck away like he's supposed to, do the right thing, but ever since Buck started dating Tommy—and ever since Buck broke up with Tommy—Eddie's been pretty bad at being well-behaved around Buck.
Buck doesn't exactly make things easy, though. Never has, truth be told. He's always been a really tactile kind of guy, and right now his tactile nature is trying to murder Eddie, dead, dead, dead.
“Lemme just…” Buck's tongue is poking out of his mouth and resting against his bottom lip in concentration—and Eddie knows he should look away but can't—and then he's leaning right into Eddie's space, like he goddamn belongs there and, oh god, Eddie can't take this. He can't. He can't fucking breathe let alone act like this isn't bothering him, like it isn't turning him on like he's a horny teenager again, like this isn't everything he wants and has dreamed of. “Eds, just… lean forward a little would you, so I can—a little bit more, man, c'mon, don't be shy, I just need to…”
Buck really is on top of Eddie now, big arms wrapped around Eddie's head, musky cologne in Eddie's nostrils and warm breath in the shell of Eddie's super-sensitive ear and fuck, he's practically straddling Eddie now, right thigh pushed up against Eddie's junk, oh hell, and Eddie is panting softly and only about two seconds away from moaning his best friend's name like the pathetic hot mess that he is, Jesus fucking Christ.
“Got it,” Buck mutters, and just as he goes to lean back and pull away from Eddie, Eddie hears his internal monologue say: Yeah, I've got it real bad. 
Then something just—snaps inside of his brain before it's shutting down completely and his heart is in his throat as he finds himself whispering, “Screw it,” while he grabs onto both of Bucks biceps with purpose because he's terrified that if he doesn't, they might leave him forever.
“Wait,” he says. Pleads. 
Buck's right thigh is snug against Eddie's left one, the other still in Eddie's lap, his gorgeous face right there next to Eddie's, so close Eddie can almost feel the prickle of Buck's stubble.
“Eds?” Buck whispers, and his breath is mingling with Eddie's and Eddie hasn't prayed for a long, long time, but he's praying now; praying that he's not about to fuck up the best thing, bar Christopher, that has ever happened to him; praying for redemption; praying that Buck might want Eddie even just a fraction of the amount Eddie wants Buck.
His voice breaks when he says the only thing he can. “Don't go.”
Eddie wants this so, so badly, just this one thing, that's all he's asking for, and he's willing to beg for it if he has to—swears he'll never ask for anything again as long as he fucking lives.
“I'm not, Eds, I'm…” Buck trails off, frowning a little. He swallows audibly and licks at those sinful lips that are right fucking there and then says, “What, um—w-what exactly do you mean by 'don't go', Eddie?”
Eddie's heart is thumping so hard against his ribcage it feels as if it's going to burst right out of his chest, and Buck has to be able to feel it too because his solid chest is pressed up firmly against Eddie's, and Eddie can't believe he's doing this and seriously might just pass the fuck out any minute now—
“I don't…” Eddie shakes his head.
Fuck.
Is he really doing this?
“You don't know? Or you don't want me to go—like, as in go home?” Buck's asking. Eddie can't breathe. “Or do you mean, like, go, uh, g-go away from—from right here?” Buck swallows again and Eddie has never wanted anything more than to lick a long stripe up that prominent Adam's Apple of Buck's. “Do you mean don't go from this, Eds? From… from you.” And that last part doesn't sound like a question, it sounds like Buck gets it, and like he isn't horrified by the idea or amused by it or as if he's pitying or mocking Eddie.
Unbelievably, it actually sounds a little like Buck might just want Eddie, too.
Eddie screws his eyes shut, and all he can manage to say is, “Yeah, Buck. The last one.”
Buck is then slowly, gently, sliding his cheek up and down Eddie's, and Eddie finally knows exactly how it feels to have that stubble dragging against his own and there is no fucking way on Earth he could hold in the almost sob-like breath that leaves his lips as Buck's line themself up with Eddie's trembling mouth.
He's gripping Buck's arms so tightly he's scared he might leave bruises there but can feel Buck smiling as he says, “Can I, Eddie? Please?”
Is this really happening?
“Fuck yes,” Eddie urges, and then Buck is kissing him; slowly; gently, and with so much of something that feels like it could be love that Eddie wants to cry.
Then Buck's pulling away, yet not really away because it's only barely enough to let Eddie swallow the boulder-sized lump in his throat and try to catch his breath—only he doesn't quite manage to catch the tear that escapes the corner of his left eye. Somehow, though, that's okay, because Buck kisses that, too—and Eddie finds himself letting it all go, then, and smiling back at the man he's been in love with for almost six years as he cries, because he can finally feel all the colours of the rainbow on his face.
“Eddie, you have no fucking idea how long I've wanted to do that,” Buck chuckles, and Eddie leans in and tilts his own head back slightly and Buck's down a little to press lips against Buck's birthmark, smiling like a fool through his tears.
Buck puts his arms fully around Eddie's shoulders and hugs him, tight.
Eddie just breathes him in until he feels settled enough to look at Buck without welling up again.
“Skin,” Buck says then, bringing his hands to Eddie's face and holding it, brushing thumb pads along Eddie's cheeks and drying his tears because he wants to, and can. Eddie squints in slight confusion at the word, before Buck's revealing the meaning behind it, telling him, “Seven down, Eds, it just came to me: It was the word skin. Yours is—man, it's even smoother than I'd imagined. So, so beautiful. You're beautiful.”
“God, I fucking love you, Buck,” Eddie blurts, because he can't help it. “I'm—I'm in love with you, Evan, and I just—I'm sorry it's taken me so long to tell you that, taken me too long to get my shit together and pull my head out of my—”
“Beautiful, insanely perfect ass,” Buck laughs, and then he's kissing Eddie again, like they've been doing this forever, and Eddie's kissing him back and laughing, too.
“Stay,” Eddie begs between kisses. “Stay forever, Buck.”
Buck looks at Eddie like a man in love and says, “I'm in love with you too, Eds. So, yeah, sure, I can do forever,” he promises.
And Buck always keeps his promises. 
.
happy pride to my beautiful firefam 🌈
(unedited pls forgive me!)
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noiriarti · 2 months
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Just Practice: Anakin Skywalker x Reader (Modern Best Friends AU) Ch. 4
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NSFW!!!!!!! Literally so NSFW!!! MDNI! Summary: Anakin is your best friend, the one person you can't survive without, and you're about to go to different colleges. You bring up your worries about your inexperience and he offers to help. Pairing: Anakin Skywalker x AFAB!Reader Word Count: 3.5k CW: usage of 'good girl,' degradation (usage of 'slut'), rough sex, lots of masturbation, p in v sex, overstimulation AN: OMG it's done!! The last chapter of the best friends AU! I'm considering adding a bonus chapter of the reader trying anal with Anakin for the first time, so let me know if you'd like to see that! As always, requests and asks are open!
Ch. 1, Ch. 2, Ch. 3, [Ch. 4], Bonus Chapter
Chapter 4: Olives and Mushrooms
You gripped the note in your hands, almost crumpling the worn paper, and you could hardly believe what you were reading. 
Since we were kids, I've considered you my closest friend. Someone who made me me. I started listening to Fall Out Boy because you did, I peel bananas upside down because you showed me how, and I only eat pepperoni pizza with olives and mushrooms because you've ordered it so much that it grew on me. I treasure you your friendship so much, and those feelings have been changing since we were younger to something more romantic. I don't know when it started, but when we kissed, I knew I loved you too much to not tell you. I've been finding myself wanting to hold your hand or kiss you all the time. You make my life so much better, and I want to spend all my time with you. Not telling you that has been torture, because you've been on my mind every minute of every day. Ben has been telling me that I stare too much at my phone, and it's only because I'm looking at texts from you or thinking about what I want to say to you. Being with you is all I've been looking forward to since we separated.
The truth is that I'm terrified to say this, so I needed to write it down. I'm scared you'll feel too weird about this, which I would understand, but I'm also scared that we just won't work out if we try. That's why I'm happy that the most understanding person in my life is the one I'm telling this to. If anyone could make it work, it would be us. I don't want to make you uncomfortable, so I want you to know that I'll respect whatever you say. If you're interested, I would love to go on a date and see where this goes. Will you go out with me?
Your breath caught in disbelief. This couldn't be happening. There was no way this was real. That Ani, your Ani, loved you back, was absurd. You'd sooner believe that he was playing an elaborate prank on you, but the writing was so sincere, so sappy, it could only have been written by your Ani. You looked up at him on the bed, scrolling on his phone and tucked into the covers, the boy you knew and loved. His smile when he saw something funny, and his quick fingers as he texted someone, probably his mom, back. The face you had dinner with frequently. The one person whom you wanted more than anything to love you the way you loved him was the person who wrote this letter to you, so sweet and sincere.
But why was it crumpled up like that? Discarded? Did you mean that little to him? Was it just something he was going to say if he needed to? To get into your pants? You imagined him writing the words out and keeping it in his bag in case you hesitated. He, of all people, would know that telling you he loved you would get you to do anything for him. The thought sent a cold stab into your heart. It couldn't be. Ani was so loyal. He'd never do that. Never. But you also would have said the same thing about him kissing you three weeks ago. And the way he treated Padme at the end of their relationship, so detached, so uninterested in her messages... Maybe you didn't know this side of him that well at all. You had to give him a chance to explain. To tell you that you were just being paranoid. Your throat felt tight as you tried to say something, but your voice came out laced with your doubt and fear.
"Anakin, what the fuck is this?" He shot up from where he was sitting on the bed, suddenly jumping and rushing over to you to snatch the paper from your hands. When he reached you, he was desperate and panicking, the fear rolling off him so strongly that you could practically feel it.
"FUCK, fuck, don't read that. Don't. Please," he begged you as he ripped the paper away and crumpled it in his hand. His eyes were wild, defensive, and you didn't understand why. If he had really meant to tell you, why would he freak out now? Unless he never meant to say anything unless he needed to.
"Were you ever planning on telling me?" The words came out gritted, sharp like a knife piercing through his skin. He visibly flinched, and you realized you had probably hit the nail on the head.
"It doesn't matter," he muttered as he looked away. The lines of his jaw were set, and you saw a muscle flare as he clenched it. Even now, you wanted him desperately. You barked out an angry laugh.
"Oh, it doesn't matter, does it? You loving me doesn't matter?" The words came out sharp, angry, scalding, like a brand on his skin. He recoiled as if struck, immediately getting defensive. His handsome features twisted, then unclenched.
"It's not like that, I-you-" he stumbled over his words as he put his hands in his air, getting frustrated with himself. He threw his arms down by his sides, then pointed a finger toward you accusingly. "Well, were you ever planning on telling me about Jake?" 
"Jake? What the fuck does Jake have to do with this?" You balked and scoffed. Both of you were raising your voices at this point, and neither of you would deescalate any time soon.
"Well your roommate obviously thinks he has something to do with it," Anakin gritted out bitterly. The temperature was rising in the room, tension growing between the two of you.
"Anakin, stop being jealous over a guy I've spoken to literally twice! I don't love him, I love--" But then you stopped yourself. He was driving you crazy, and you almost blurted out something that you shouldn't have. "Whatever."   "No, finish your sentence. Finish it. Now." He was furious, almost looming over you with his broad frame. His rust-colored hair flew in his eyes as he yelled out the words, casting shadows in his face. You knew what he wanted and the words flew out of your mouth without any defiance.
"I love you! Obviously, dumbass! Why didn't you tell me sooner?" His face fell at your admission, but then he snapped back at you.
"Cause I thought you were dating some fuck named Jake! And that you didn't want to be more than friends! You literally said we could never date to Ahsoka, like, three hours ago, remember?" His voice was hoarse from yelling. A flare of pleasure curled in your stomach at the thought that he was jealous of some random guy just because he paid attention to you, but you had to make the point that of course you couldn't say you liked Anakin to Ahsoka while he was right there. How stupid was he?
"I just said that because I thought you didn't like me like that!" You yelled back.
"Well, I do!"
"Okay!"
"Okay!" The two of you sat silent, fuming at one another. Anakin was still panting from yelling and looked so incredibly fuckable while shirtless that you almost kissed him right then and there. Then, sometime when the beating of your heart dropped to normal levels and you stopped, the realization hit that oh, Anakin was in love with you. You'd just been fighting about it, but you didn't really comprehend what that meant in your clouded anger. It meant that every time he called you baby in bed, he meant it. It meant that he didn't just want to practice. It meant that you two could be together, finally more than friends. The warmth you had felt before was growing, filling every part of your soul and bursting through the uncertainty you had about him. Anakin loved you. And this was probably the best day of your life.
"Anakin, say it, please," you begged. You wanted to hear him say it, not in anger or frustration, or in some hidden note, but out loud. To make it real. He had softened since your fight, and approached you with that same gentleness you loved. His strong, warm arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you into his embrace again and leaning his forehead against yours.
"I love you," he whispered tenderly. His blue eyes shone with affection, just like they had for years. It was perfect, so sweet and honest, just like your Ani. The silence sat between you for several long seconds, each moment intensifying the stares you were giving one another. You weren't sure which one of you moved first. Your mouths crashed together with enough force to pull a groan out of you as he kissed you fiercely. Your nails dragged down the warm skin of his bare back while his hands found your hair. Still kissing you frantically, Anakin pushed you against the wall by the bathroom and pressed your bodies against the cool drywall. A moan ripped out of his mouth against yours as you bit his lip brutally, pouring all your anger and desire and love into your movements. You kept teasing him with your tongue, swiping it across his lips or touching it to his, and he had enough.
"Get on the bed before I make you," he growled. 
You were still wearing the lace bra under your sleep shirt, so you threw the old tee off on the way to the bed, leaving you in just your bra and shorts, with nothing beneath them. When you saw he was close, you grabbed his shoulder and pulled him down onto you, settling himself between your legs. Soon, you felt the hardness you knew well grow and rut against you. Anakin's mouth on yours was demanding and muffled your moans as you thrust your hips up to meet his. He broke off from you to trail sloppy kisses down your jaw to your throat, which finally led to him sucking a mark into the crook of your neck. His teeth scraped against the sensitive skin and you gasped. He obviously enjoyed the sound and smiled against you. You got the sense that he was devoted to making you feel pleasure, lapping up every sound and word as his reward. All he wanted was for you to feel as good as he did, latched onto your neck.
When he pulled away, his face shone with pride at the dark mark he had left on you. He loved making you his. He immediately went further down to your bra, kissing over the top of your breasts and occasionally teasing you with his tongue. You sat up for a moment, during which you could see the visible panic in his eyes that he had done something wrong. You unclipped the bra from the back, letting it fall. He grinned widely at you, like it was his first time seeing a girl naked. Well, half-naked, you thought.
Anakin immediately resumed kissing down your collarbone, finally getting where he wanted. When his lips connected with your nipple and you felt his tongue dart out, you moaned obscenities into the quiet room. There was no one but the two of you in the world. Emboldened, his teeth scraped your nipple while his free hand went to pinch the other, hard, shooting pain and pleasure into your core. He alternated between the sting of his pinches and his soothing tongue as you keened out his name over and over. You would never get tired of saying it. By the time he had left marks all over your chest, you were sure the neighbors would report you to the building manager. 
"I love you," you whispered when he gazed up at you with his eyes.
"Don't tell me that now," he grunted against your nipple. A breathy laugh escaped your chest.
"What? Why?"
“Makes me want to wreck you.” The way he bit it out, with so much mischief in his voice, made you want to see him try.
"Then do it," you teased back. God, you loved that smile. You slipped your thumbs beneath the waistband of your shorts and pulled them off. Having someone see you completely naked for the first time was terrifying, but Anakin looked so hungry and reverent that it soothed the fear. He kissed his way down your stomach to your pussy, only stopping to groan when you wove your hands through his soft hair and pulled.
His lips finally met your desperate clit, still sensitive and swollen from your orgasms earlier. You moaned his name loudly, in almost a yelp, and he kept moving his warm, wet tongue faster, faster against you. Everything slid together so perfectly, moistened both by his spit and your wetness, that you were finding yourself get close faster than you would have expected. You tilted your hips up to him, spreading your legs even further. A finger poked at your pussy, and you jumped a bit in surprise before you felt it slide in with ease. You weren't just wet, you were practically soaked. His spit coated your inner thighs and probably the lower half of his face, but he was unrelenting. It started from your toes and cracked like a whip through your body. Your mouth gaped open in a silent scream as you came on his face and clenched your legs around his head.
While you came, he focused on fingering you and found that place that made you let out a whine while he pressed it during a particularly strong aftershock. You were panting and sweating like you had just played one of Anakin's games for him. On top of that, you were sure your hair looked messy and foul and distinctly unsexy, but he pulled himself off you and told you otherwise. 
"You look beautiful, darling," he said in pure worship as he caught his breath. His chin was covered in a thin sheen of spit and your juices, which made your pussy constrict on his finger again.
"Think you can manage one more for me, baby?" You nodded. Yes, you would do anything for him. You would walk over glass to please him right now. He dove back in, tongue consistently stroking your oversensitive clit in just the right way. You squirmed under his head, pulling your arms off his hair in your movements. Shit. This wasn't going to be an easy orgasm. He used his hands to grab your wrists and hold them down as you shook and moved under him. It was clear you weren't going anywhere. Everything hurt in a delightful way, especially your clit, which was begging you to pause. This time, it was softer, more effort for you. You clenched your stomach and bore down on his fingers, desperately wanting to cum. 
The sweat dripped down your forehead, and you felt it coming. It washed over you in warm waves, a weaker echo of the previous ones that day, but much more draining. Your head was soft and fuzzy, all about Anakin. He was all there was to you, right now, in the euphoria. His strong arms, lifting you up, kissing your cheek, telling you how good you were, that you were his good girl. When you felt more present, there was one thing you desperately wanted. To be filled. Your pussy had felt his fingers and wanted, needed, more.
Anakin had positioned himself above you, keeping his hips distinctly far from you to give you a bit to recover, but busied himself by kissing your face and whispering sweet words in your ear.
"Hang on, baby," he said as you started pawing down his chest to pull down his pants and grab his cock, trying to get him to line up and slam into you. He slid out of the flannel, then pulled out a condom from the pocket, and rolled it on.
"But Ani," you whined, thrusting up into his thigh. You needed him.
"I know, baby. I know. I'll take care of you as soon as I know you want this," he said. You nodded, swallowing down a pinch of anticipation.
In his eyes, you saw him, all of him. The shouted insults when you beat him at Mario Kart, the sweet kisses. His nose going red and runny from the cold in your snow fort. The sardonic eye roll he gave when he was furious at you, the way only you could make him, and the grin he gave when he got a good grade. His voice when he whispered to you that he loved you. He was made up of these tiny little things, little bits of starlight and darkness, all shoved and compressed to make one man. Your Anakin.
"Ani, I love you. So much. And now that I know you love me, there's nothing more that I want than to do everything with you. So stop worrying, and just fuck me already." His smile was everything.
Anakin pushed into you slowly, letting out a soft grunt when he first felt your heat around him, and it was obvious he was holding himself back for your sake. He was so big, so thick, that when you thought there couldn't possibly be any left, he just kept getting deeper. He bottomed out inside you and paused, but you jerked your hips up, wanting him to move, fast, slow, anything. Anakin took the hint.
His thrusting was fast, precise, just like him. You swore you could feel the ridge of his cock as he moved within you, but your pleasure-induced babbling drowned out everything else.
"Fuck, Ani, shit that's so good, fuck me fuck me fuckmefuckme fuck your little slut!" You realized what you said with a little gasp. It wasn't intentional, but fuck it felt good to say. Anakin was clearly surprised, but quickly cast you a hungry grin. He loved it. 
"So you want to be fucked like a slut, huh? Turn around. Now," he growled as he pulled out of you, grabbed your hips, and whipped you around. You barely landed on your hands and knees when he slammed into you again, and you let out a keen. Anakin smacked your ass before setting a consistent, punishing pace, letting small grunts and groans drop from his lips as he got closer. With the angle of your hips, he was hitting the same, deep spot within you over and over, and you practically couldn't close your mouth.
"Fuck yes, fuck me like a slut, fuck me, yesyesyesyes," you chanted as he grabbed your hair and pulled. The feeling was just like earlier that night, when he fucked your throat, but he was harsher. Your scalp stung so perfectly, adding to the overwhelming array of feelings. Even though you wanted to, your pussy couldn't squeeze out another orgasm. It was just too much. Anakin was feeling it too, and his sounds got more frantic along with his hips. In a few seconds, he leant over you, teasing your ear with his pants.
“I don’t-- I don’t think I can last any longer, fuck, baby, your pussy is too good,” he breathed. He sped up, snapping his hips into yours erratically as he moaned your name and came. His jaw flexed, his brow furrowed, and his eyes clenched through it. When he was done, he pulled out of you slowly, tied off the condom, and tossed it in the trash by your bed before returning to give you some love. He drew you to his chest, scratching your scalp and kissing your forehead, until you both were almost asleep. Anakin prodded you into using the bathroom and brushing your teeth before you passed out.
This time, when you came back from the bathroom, there were no more discoveries, just Anakin in your bed, exactly where he belonged. He pulled you in with his strong arm, pressing his chest to your back as you both drifted off.
When you woke up, you thanked your lucky stars Ahsoka hadn't come home yet, because you were butt-naked and sprawled on top of Anakin. It took a moment to register that Anakin, your best friend, was in your bed, and then another to realize that, oh yeah. He was your boyfriend now. For the rest of the weekend he acted just like you thought he would, getting you dinner and holding your hand. You also bickered and told each other all the stories you had missed. You had become romantic partners, but you were still best friends at your core. Not that much had changed, really.
When he left, the loneliness and homesickness of being at college was lighter. You knew, standing by the train platform and waving at him through the window, that he would be back. Over and over again you would come back to one another, until you could finally be together again. As you braved the crowds of Grand Central, trying to find your way to the goddamned subway, your phone pinged. 
Anakin: Coach just told me I'm playing Princeton next weekend Anakin: Well I'm really bench warming Anakin: You should come visit Anakin: Cheer me on Anakin: Only 1 hr by train
You: I'll get tix
Anakin: See you there baby
You smiled to yourself and walked back to your dorm.
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Tag List (let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future works!): @doblasftcisco @aliciaasky @cultofsin @avalovesjoe1 @akixxrafiiy @princearthur4 @sythethecarrot @jackie-on-the-loose @throughparisallthroughrome @rhiannonhippiegirl
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rotdistressxox · 6 months
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Scenario: Date Night with the Papas ♡
!Nsfw! No smut, just some very intimate details.
Primo / Papa Emeritus I
• A letter appears under your office door. Curiously, you pick it up and look at the wax seal. It was a very ornate 'P' on it, so the sender basically revealed himself.
• You slice it open with a letter opener and read:
"My Dearest (Reader)
I know I've been gone for quite some time due to my presence being requested at another ministry. Every second I'm away from you only makes me yearn for you more. When I get back, I would like to treat you to the finest delicacies I've come accross while staying overseas. Be ready as soon as I get back. By the time you read this, I will be arriving in a few days. I look forward to seeing you soon,
Your Beloved Papa Emeritus I"
• You dance around with the letter, giving it a big smooch and putting in your priority drawer. Time to shop for a date night outfit!
• The day comes and you're all fancied up for him. Perfume put skillfully where it should be. You were R-E-A-D-Y.
• A knock raps at the door. Primo. You adjust yourself properly before he opens the door, singing your name.
• "My love" He grabs your waist tenderly and plants a kiss on your cheek. "I wish to savor you longer, but we do have plans. Let us leave". You nod, respecting his urgency. You hang onto his arm as you head to the ministry's more private dining area.
• The evening was spent with him telling you about his travels, sharing playful glances, and eating good food. Primo was one to pay attention to details. Especially food. There had to be some form of aphrodisiacs to give the mood some romance. Even though your love for him and his for you, was unmatched.
• There was nothing that could truly rival the part of the day when your longings reached its peak.
• "Have you missed me that much?" He says as the two of you walk the quiet, candlelit corridors to his room. You hum as his hand rubs your hips. "Tonight, I shall make up for that"
• As soon as his door closes, you two were on eachother like magnets. Barely making it to the bed. Kisses turned into passionate gazes while he gracefully stripped your clothes off, savoring you like he wanted to before. His long hair tickling your bare skin.
• "Ti penso ogni notte e giorno" he said into your lips. Moments like this was when he felt in his prime again. As a man of his age, he saved all of his strength to pleasure you. Taking you to the hilt as he worships every detail.
• His lovemaking always exceeded expectations. It was worth it to long for him every night.
Secondo / Papa Emeritus II
• It was your 2 year anniversary with Secondo.
• Initially, you told him you could plan something. But he was adamant about doing it himself and would suprise you.
• You didn't know what to expect, but Secondo was never one to disappoint.
• He takes you in a limousine to an undisclosed location. He's not in his usual robes, instead dawning a blazer, button up, and dress pants. Something was definitely different about what was going to happen.
• As he opens the door for you, you stand infront of downward staircase which lead to an underground nightclubs. Commonly used by the Papas to have more of their personal rituals in. This should be fun.
• After a few drinks, Secondo and you were certainly the life of the party. Dancing with no room left for Jesus. Bodies flush together as his thigh was pressed between your legs. The music was slow yet full of emotion.
• Tonight, there was nobody else but you on his mind.
• "Sei sexy" he whispered in your ear. "Mi ecciti...mi fai impazzire" his gloved hands guided your hips to move in sync with his. "I would take you right here and now in a heart beat if I could" his voice so sultry it made your knees weak.
• You've learned some Italian, so now was as good of a time as ever to use it to your advantage. "Cattivo papa~" you looked into his eyes while sliding your hands up his chest.
• He tilted his head back slightly and groaned. Hearing that come out of your mouth sent all the right reactions through his body.
• "I don't know if I can hold myself back any longer" he groped your rear roughly. His multi-colored eyes filled with carnal desire as the world around him disappeared.
• "Let's not waste any time then" You took him by the arm and left the club. He found it hard to keep his hands off of you whilst heading back in the limousine. Desperately kissing you, leaving you gasping for air as his mustache tickled your lip.
• The night was filled with never ending pleasure which lasted until morning. Making sure your body remembered every inch of his love. Bodies covered in sweat, and heartbeats slowing down. You and him fell asleep for the day.
Terzo / Papa Emeritus III
• Terzo had this day trip planned out for a while now. He made sure it fell on the right day on the right time. Tracked the weather just to make sure.
• He wanted to take you to a beach he frequented as a child. It would be perfect for a candle light picnic.
• Bought you two matching swimsuits just for the occasion. You quickly changed into it as Terzo was already wearing his half. As you step out of the changing tent, his eyes light up.
• "My lucifer. Antichrist. You look ravaging" he takes your hand and kisses up your arm. "Let's have fun today, sì?" You nodded.
• Most of the day you were walking hand in hand with him. Strolling as the waves hit your feet and the wind blew your hair. Until he dragged you into the water.
• He was an excellent swimmer despite his size. Showing off his skills as he swam around you and splashed water in your face.
• His arms wrapped around you as his chest pressed into yours. "Ready?" "Mhm". You take a deep breath as you and him submerge yourself under the water. You look at his hair weightless and floating in the water. The crystal blue waters surrounding you two as you sink and let your knees hit the sand.
• He had borrowed a breathing incantation spell from the library, with the help of the ghouls of course. You would be able to hold your breath longer whilst you were under the water.
• He lifts you up so that you stand on your feet. 'Trust me' he mouths. He couldn't speak underwater afterall.
• He shows you around all of the rock formations, fish swim past you nonchalantly as you are in complete awe of what your seeing. By this time, the both of you would have to come up for air soon.
• 'I love you' He mouths, pulling you into him. 'I love you, too' you push a few floating hairs out of his face. He smiles and presses his lips onto yours, closing his eyes. The both of you begin to float upwards as the kiss continues until you surface.
• Terzo dries you off with a towel as you lay back in a lounging chair. Drying your legs slowly as he has to leave a few kisses everytime he's done drying that spot in particular.
• "Did I ever tell you how beautiful you look in that bathing suit?" "Yes, I counted atleast 13" "Well did I ever tell you how amazing you'd look if you took it off slowly, and infront of me?"
Copia / Papa Emeritus IV
• Movie niiightt!!
• Gets the old popcorn machine from the basement to work so there's copious amounts of it for the both of you.
•Candy, sweets, drinks, anything you can name is laid out on the table.
• He has a specific system to how picking out movies would work. Your pick, his pick, your pick, then if there's time, the both of you decide on one.
• Since his room is very small and he doesn't really have a couch. He let's you sit on the bed while he sits on the floor. You rest your chin on his head while the movie begins to play.
• You almost ate all of the candy, just like he expected. The first movie was just ending and there was at least a few more to get through. Exhaling, you burrow you nose into his shoulder.
• He smells more fragrant than usual. He definitely has some cologne on. You sigh as you lightly massage his scalp. It didn't seem to bother him as his eyes were still glued to the screen.
• Your fingers trace down his neck to his shoulders. Kneading his shoulders gently. He let's out some small groans as he tilts his head to the side.
• "You're a little tense, hm?" He hums. Your fingers squeeze a little tighter, making him bite his lip. "You need to have better posture when working, Copia" your voice sends a shiver down his spine.
• "I know" he closes his eyes. Your lips trace down his neck, and his gloved hands visibly grip his sweatpants. "Easy easy. Just focus on the movie" "But-" "Focus"
• He tries his best to keep his eyes opened as your hands knead into his shoulder muscles. He thought it the worst had passed, but when you finally found a sweet spot, he tossed his head back and covered his mouth.
• "Oh my, looks like the second movie is just gonna have to wait" You sat yourself on his lap, back facing him as your hips pressed against him. "Me next"
• He eagerly felt up your back, rubbing circles tenderly until he found the most sensitive place and began to move his fingers more skillfully in that area.
• "Copiaaa" you whine as he gets rougher. "What's wrong, I thought you asked for this?" He stopped and pulled you in so that your back was pressed against his torso. "Too much?" He grabbed your hips and planted them firmly on his crotch. "Or not enough?"
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The Best Laid Plans
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Summary: Y/N has a plan to torment Jensen a little. But we all know what they say about the best laid plans.
Warnings/Explicit 18+: It's just smut. 😁 Teasing. Sexting. Slightly dom!Jensen & sub!reader. Semi-public nudity. Orgasm denial (sorta). Masturbation. (sorta). Dirty talk.
Pairings: Jensen x Reader
Word Count: 1,500
A/N: So, I've been planning on writing something with this picture since it was released during JibCon 14. I have no idea what he was talking about, thinking about, or what was being discussed at this moment. So, context has been completely removed in deference to my lust-filled, trash-heap mind. So...enjoy, I hope! 😁❤️
A/N 2: As always this story is about a Jensen from a different part of the multiverse who is single. This is a complete and utter work of fiction. 😊
Jensen Ackles RPF Master List || Main Master List
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He had plans for you. So. Many. Plans…
You had been teasing him for hours and hours, sending him naughty pics that he tried to ignore, but simply couldn’t. He opened your latest text on stage, knowing it was going to be filthy, but incapable of waiting. He let Misha answer the question while he pulled his phone out of his pocket and clicked open the text.
You could see him struggling not to react. 
The photo had been taken from above. That had been a bit tricky to rig up. You’d been afraid someone would come in and think you were some creep trying to take pictures of people in the bathroom. But you’d managed to get the shot without an audience. 
The shot in question was of you in a bathroom stall, leaning against the door. Your tight sweater was pulled up and you gripped one fleshy breast in your hand, squeezing hard. Your short skirt was lifted, hips thrust forward while your hand was buried in your panties. Your head was thrown back, a look of ecstasy on your face, as you touched yourself.
At the bottom, in pink puffy letters, were the words, “Thinking of You.”
From the front row you watched Jensen shift restlessly on the tall stool he sat on, discreetly adjusting his jeans. His gaze found you in the audience, and he leveled a steely look your way. The look said he had plans for you. So. Many. Plans.
It was such a long panel after that. That look had shifted the game between you two. Now it was you who couldn’t sit still, shifting and trying to subtly press your thighs together. Every once in a while, Jensen stared you down again with another heated look and your core muscles clenched and your stomach almost ached with want. 
You’d never felt so empty, you were desperate to have him fill you up, and by the time the panel ended you were practically panting. You rose with everyone as they left to go to photo ops with the boys. But when you walked out of the auditorium, Jensen was there.
People shouted out greetings and he smiled and gave them a wave, but he quickly ushered you down the hallway, his hand possessively resting on the small of your back and propelling you forward.
He pushed you into an empty conference room. It was much smaller than the hall you’d come from, but still spacious. But when Jensen clicked the lock on the door, it seemed to shrink to a very tiny space, consisting of only the two of you and the air you breathed.
Jensen turned to face you and that same look was back in his eye. You let out a nervous giggle, anticipation singing in your veins. 
“Did you like the pictures?” You asked coyly.
Jensen smirked and shook his head. “Think you’re pretty funny, don’t you, baby? Trying to distract me on stage? Make me stumble over my words? Make me fight to stay calm? To do my damnedest not to get a fucking hard on in front of everyone?”
You bit your bottom lip and nodded. “Yeah, it was fun. You should have seen your face.”
That expression was back, the one that said he was going to ruin you; god knew your panties were already ruined.
Jensen tilted his head and a devilish smile curved the corners of his mouth. “Why don’t you recreate that last picture for me now?”
You frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I mean,” Jensen’s voice was low and demanding, “go lean against that wall and pose for me. Just exactly how you did in that bathroom.”
You shook your head. The point had been to make him hot and bothered so he wouldn’t wait, wouldn’t hesitate to fuck you stupid the second he was off stage.
You started to protest. “But I-”
“Now.” His voice didn’t get any louder, but it was firm and hard and brooked no argument.
With butterflies in your stomach you moved over to get into the pose. Nerves made your hands shake as you lifted your sweater up and slid down a bra strap so you could pull out your right breast. 
Suddenly you were wondering; how strong was that door lock? How many people had keys? 
God! What if they have cameras monitoring the room? You thought frantically. 
But despite those worries you did as Jensen said, raising your skirt and slipping your right hand into your panties as your left hand crossed your body to take your tit into your palm and squeeze. 
A soft cry fell from your lips as your sensitive nipples reacted to the pressure.
“Perfect.” Jensen said quietly.
He moved over to pull a chair out from one of the tables, and sat down on it, crossing his legs to rest his ankle on his other knee. He folded his arms over his chest and just stared at you for nearly a full minute. You began to tremble slightly under his scrutiny. 
“Jensen?” You asked softly, slightly confused with his plan now.
Jensen held a finger up to his lips. “Shh! No talking sweetheart. I want you to show me what you were doing in that stall. Touch yourself. Rub your clit and tug on your nipple.”
“But I thought, I mean I want you to fuck me.” Your voice was a whine.
Jensen raised an eyebrow. “I know what you want, baby. But you spent all morning and afternoon teasing me, so you don’t deserve to be fucked just yet.” He nodded at you. “Now, do as I say.”
With a little whimper you followed his instructions, rubbing your middle finger in circles on your clit and tugging roughly on your breast. Your breath caught as you chased your high and your head thumped back against the wall as you panted out your need. 
You started to slip your finger into your opening, but Jensen shook his head. “No!” He barked out. “I didn’t say you could fuck yourself. I said to touch yourself.”
You moaned out your misery. “I’m so empty, Jensen, please. I need you, need your cock to fill me up.” Your hips fucked the air, as your finger twirled around your clit. 
"Aww, poor baby.” Jensen teased you with a wicked smile. “Are you uncomfortable? Can’t find satisfaction when you’re aching for it? That must be tough.”
You knew you deserved the torture for all your impish delights throughout the day, but you still whimpered as you continued the torment on yourself.
Suddenly there was a knock at the door and you squeaked, pulling your hand out of your panties and starting to adjust your clothes, but Jensen held up his hand, finger raised. “Don’t even think about it. Stay the way you were.”
“Jensen!” You whispered loudly.
He shot you a look that said, “obey” and you could only comply, resuming your previous position.
Jensen walked to the door and opened it slightly. Thankfully you could stay hidden on the other side of it.
The person on the other side sounded rushed. “Jensen, you’re supposed to be at your photo ops. They’re waiting for you.”
Jensen nodded. “K, give me just a second.” He closed the door and walked towards you. He reached forward and pushed your hand aside to rub you through your panties. You bit your lip hard to keep from moaning.
“I’ve gotta go, sweetheart. But I want to see you in this exact position when I get back.”
Your eyes got round and wide. “What? You can’t leave me here like this!” You squeaked at him in a pseudo-whisper. 
But he ignored you. “If I come back and you’ve moved, I’ll make sure you don’t come for days, I promise you that.”
“Jensen.” You whined. The idea of being left in this room, half naked and waiting for him to come back, had your slick dripping down your inner thigh.
He took his hand away from you and then leaned forward to kiss you swift and hard. He trailed his lips across your jaw and then whispered into your ear, his breath hot. 
“Can’t let my naughty girl get away with anything, can I? Be good, be patient, and when I get back in an hour, I’ll bend you over that table and fuck you till you can’t walk.”
He pulled back to see your face, and then bent forward and licked your lips open, kissing you again, deeper and more lingering. Before you could really be satisfied with it though, he stepped back from you.
He gave his head a shake. “God, I fucking love you like this, sweetheart. All desperate and dripping, and just aching for my cock.” He groaned lightly. “Trust me, this is gonna hurt me a lot more than it hurts you.”
With that he spun away from you and walked out the door, leaving you there to try and figure out just how your plan had backfired so magnificently.
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Jensen RPF and Any/All Characters:
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Any/All Fics Regardless of Character or Fandom:
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Everything Incl. Fan Edits:
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riptidewaters · 1 year
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Lipstick
Nate Archibald x Fem! Reader! (NAMED)
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“UGH! Get me the new Alexander Mcqueen Bag Dorota!” Blair Screeched at her loyal servant, the latter muttering a meek ‘Yes, Miss Blair’ and hurrying away. Blair Waldorf, the “mean girl” of Constance and self-proclaimed Queen of the Upper East Side was, according to her throwing the “hottest party” in the whole year. ‘Hey B!’ Serena Van der Woodsen, the “it girl” of New York waved to her best friend, running forward and hugging her tightly, ‘I am so happy that you came back from Europe!’ she declared. Blair scoffed while striking names off the invite list, ‘Well, after Chuck ditched me at the airport I decided to take a girl's trip and travel around Europe anyway!’, She put the list down and walked over to the massive tables full of entreès and delicately put one in her mouth, Serena following her, Blair continued, ‘Anyways, enough about my broken love life, what's the gossip I’ve been hearing on you and Nate?”. Serena looked panicked, “There’s absolutely nothing going on between us! I haven’t dated anyone the entire summer!’ She said proudly, Blair paused and looked at Serena, ‘Wait- S, are you telling me you’ve gotten zero action for the ENTIRE Summer?!’. Serena shrugged, ‘Maybe, well there was that one hot lifeguard-’, Blair looked excited, ‘And....?’, ‘I rejected him’. Blair’s face fell, ‘Seriously S?, I’m gone for one summer and-’. Serena shook her head, ‘Wait! Before you launch into one of your speeches, I've got a surprise for you!’, She sang happily, Blair raised her eyebrows, ‘And what might that be May I ask?’. Serena grinningly thrust a letter into her hand, ‘Read it!’ She said. Blair rolled her eyes,
Dear Serena,
I wasn’t sure if you would remember me, but it’s Charlotte, from junior year. I hope you do! Anyways I’m coming back to Constance this year! I could not be more excited to meet you all again! Maybe we could meet up a few days before school starts? Let me where you are. Well Adios for now! Do tell Blair, Nate and Chuck I said hi!(especially Nate)
Love,
Charlotte.
Blair’s eyes widened, ‘Charlotte, the Charlotte is coming back?’ She questioned excitedly, Serena nodded grinning brightly. ‘I already sent her the invite to your party, if that's cool with you? She said that she’ll come.’ Blair smiled, ‘Definitely!’ ‘Wait! Should we tell Nate?’. She asked Serena looking at the letter, ‘Maybe it should be a surprise.’ Blair nodded, starting a conversation about party favours.
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‘I’ve been waiting for this all day.’ Nate muttered, biting her lip, ‘You sure Serena’s okay with covering for you? She was a little cold.’ Catherine said rubbing herself against Nate, ‘Oh she’s totally fine.’ he said closing his eyes and leaning in, ‘But you haven’t told her anything?’ Cathrine questioned pulling Nate for a chaste kiss, He shook his head, ‘All she knows is I’m seeing someone new...I’m not ready to introduce to anyone yet.’ She pulled away, pushing Nate behind and looking at him with a stern look in her eyes, ‘Or ever.’ He finished. ‘Look, she needed time to decompress from her breakup anyway,’ Nate kissed her, ‘Covering for me works for her too.’ A car whizzed by the one they were in, Catherine looked alarmed, ‘Let’s go back to my place before anyone spots us.’ Nate raised his eyebrows, ‘Your House?’ She grinned, nodding, ‘I thought we couldn’t.’ She smiled at him, ‘There’s always the guest house’. Nate chuckled pulling her in for another kiss.
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‘Okay, how do I look?!’ Blair asked twirling around for Serena to see, She smiled ‘Gorgeous as always B.’ She remarked Blair turned around adjusting her iconic bejewelled headband, ‘How do you think She looks now?’ She asked Serena, ‘I don’t think she might have changed too much,’ Serena shrugged. ‘Probably’ Blair agreed. Looking in the mirror, ‘Excuse me?’ She asked a random saleswoman, ‘Can I get this in white?’, The woman nodded and walked towards the display to get it off the mannequin. ‘This dress is perfect for my party!’ She squealed excitedly clapping her hands. Serena smiled, ‘Now that you’re done can we go look for my dress?’, Blair grinned ‘I’m sure I can take out a few minutes of my valuable time to go look for your dress.’ She said, Serena laughed and grabbed Blair by her shoulders, ‘We are getting out now!’. With that the two girls walked out laughing.
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The day of the white party was a complete disaster..... at least it was according to a certain Charles Bass, famously known as Chuck Bass. Blair had asked him if he loved her the day he had met James, Blair’s seemingly “perfect” boyfriend and he had stupidly kept his big mouth shut and made her cry. Showing up to the White party had been a pain in his arse, especially when he saw Blair making out with her new boyfriend who had supposedly gone to “Georgetown”. And then something worth the attention of Chuck Bass happened, He saw Charlotte Jackson, also known as the one who disappeared after Junior year, staring at Serena Van der Woodsen having a spit-swapping session with Nate Archibald. Chuck grabbed a glass of white wine off a tray smirking, ‘Well, that’s going to be fun...’ with that he sauntered off towards an awestruck Charlotte.
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Part 2 is now out!
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verstarppen · 1 month
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A THANK YOU LETTER
an apology and update! for all you beautiful people - 2 for the price of 1
hello! over the months i've written and deleted this letter because i was too much of a coward to show my face after i left. i contemplated if it would be adequate enough, if it even matters. At the end, i owe this fandom too much, so here it is:
THE APOLOGY
i am truly sorry. there's no better way of putting it.
the more i create the more i realise how this fandom held my hand and i simply wouldn't be the person i am now if this blog never existed. i've always struggled with sharing art and writing online, as i thought it was too lame and took the coward route of keeping it to myself and my closest friends.
ever since this blog, i've found that less of an issue. the more i think about how much i let you and myself down by disappearing the more i feel the shame weigh me down. i never wanted to leave, but life has this funny way of forcing your hand when you least expect it.
without getting too personal, this year hasn't been great for me or anyone close to me - friendships died, family members were hospitalised, university crushed me, expectations from everyone around me made me question if i'm failing in every aspect of my life, i lost passions like art - something i've always thought of as my dream career, and i fear the stress will only grow rather than die down.
in some of those harder moments i would always turn to a distraction, create something for a fandom i enjoy to get my mind off things. to see your comments and your messages always kept me going even when i physically couldn't take the stress of everything around me anymore. being busy made my flame for F1 dwindle, too. it's one of the main reasons i didn't return earlier. I've missed half the races this year, yes that includes both lando and oscar's wins, and although im looking forward to the summer break ending and the racecs coming back, i don't think the enthusiasm will ever return to the way it was when this blog was at its peak.
i feel like a coward for disappearing and it's a big regret of mine this year. i can't promise to write for F1 again, but what i've made will always be archieved here :)
THE UPDATE
not great. i can't even lie i'm not doing too hot right now. i promised i would return to writing when things finally calmed down and yet the more stress there was the more one off projects i made to combat it. throughout the months i've accumulated a lot of side projects for different fandoms like star wars, star trek, dc, merlin and lesser known fandoms such as heavy rain, mortal kombat, the sims (no seriously have you seen the lore) etc. that i have nowhere to post. in april i decided i can't afford (literally) to distract myself with any hobby projects for the sake of my situation and thus... i was an idiot and i deleted my ao3 account. there weren't that many stories on there anyway, but i regret it even if it was the right decision.
i owe @wtfisakilometer2 so much for telling me that the people who love the blog wouldn't mind what fandom it is as long as it's by me, even if i don't fully believe it. it did open my eyes to finally write this, though, so direct all your love to her.
so that leaves me here, sort of homeless on my own blog and with very conflicting feelings about it's direction. i intend to preserve it as an archive of my F1 writing without messing with it, but still let you know about my new ao3 and everything on it so i can keep both our interests in mind.
thank you for reading if you made it this far, i hope you have an awesome day and a lot of cat memes in your pinterest. thank you for all the lovely messages (i read everything) and thank you for everything this fandom has offered me. i will truly never get over you guys.
- star :)
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ledarklink · 2 months
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A letter from a fan to Ashley
Dear Ashley,
As a person who lives with bipolar disorder, throughout the years, I've felt lost and misunderstood plenty of times. However, ever since I met you and your art I found a place of comfort where I don't feel lonely. In your music, I've found solace and thanks to it I've got the chance to reinvent myself and see light in my darkest moments.
You've been through hell these couple of years, and thanks to Lucky and Manic I realize that you've been struggling your whole life, just like me and many others. You make me feel seen, and I'm grateful for it. I'm sorry so many people cannot understand that.
From the bottom of my heart, I'm begging you, please don't let those negative comments full of hatred get through you because they don't come from a place of love and kindness. I know it's hard to ignore them, especially when they come from people who say to admire you. But the people who love you understand your struggle.
You are one kind soul, and I appreciate your effort. Making music while struggling with a health issue is something beyond my comprehension because I don't think I would be capable of doing it and certainly the people who've been sending you comments full of hate wouldn't either. Nevertheless you were, because you are a strong woman, as Ashley or as H.
I'll keep patiently waiting for your album release, because I'm really looking forward to it. For now, I'll go listen to lucky and thank the universe for still having such a wonderful human being around who can keep making songs where I can find myself when I feel lost.
I don't know if you'll ever get to read this whole thing, but if you do thanks for keeping your spaces open for interaction, even when there's so many people with a rotted heart.
Signed:
A fan who loves you and who will always have your back ✨
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Note
as much as i love buggy, i’m gonna request sanji for the fluffy alphabet!
let’s go foooor… C, D, N, U, and Y please! (my goldfish brain forgot if you said five at the most lol)
i love your work sm and i really wish you all the best!
Yay flirty chef!! Most of the requests for the Fluffabet have been Mihawk so far, which I am NOT COMPLAINING ABOUT I love him a very abnormal amount; but Sanji is just so precious and writing for him just
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*melts into a silly giggling puddle*
Aaaaanyway. I very much want to thank you for requesting the letter U, I've kind of been looking forward to it, since it gives me creative freedom to brainstorm further and deeper into the characters and their quirks/psychologies, and I always love doing that.
Thank you for the request, and I hope you enjoy!!!
Also feel free to come back and make requests for Buggy, as I've gotten none for him yet at all. Sad clown noises.
Also also, since someone else asked, requests for the Fluffy Alphabet will remain open until all letters are claimed for all characters; and I'll still accept requests for other characters I haven't listed if I feel I can write them and do them justice, I just listed the ones I did because they're the ones I've written the most. Until I state on my Masterpost that requests are closed, they are very much open!!
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C is for Courtship (How would they court you?)
“The heavens must be dull these days with their most beautiful goddess stuck down here.”
Firmly believes it was love at first sight, and Sanji is absolutely determined to win you over. As much as he wants to pull you in by your hands, wrap his arms around you, and tell you he’s loved you since the moment he first laid eyes on you; he also doesn’t want to overstep any boundaries and risk blowing his chances.
Flirty, flirty, flirty. He can’t help it, it's just what he does—but he’s respectful about it, dropping silly little lines designed to make you giggle, hopefully make you blush a little. Beyond that, though, he’s going to make every effort possible to legitimately get to know you; your likes and dislikes, your goals, your dreams, everything, wanting to ensure that you know he’s interested in you for more than just being a pretty face that happened to catch his eye.
If you flirt back, you’re never going to be able to get rid of him, he’s your responsibility now, basically a lost puppy that followed you home, end of story.
He’s bent on impressing you, so your first date he’s going to insist on cooking for you, just the two of you—meeting you with a bouquet of your favorite flowers (he made sure to ask in passing about your favorites at some point beforehand), with a light kiss on the cheek and a soft touch at your waist.
D is for Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning and other such household chores?)
“No, no, you sit down and relax, I can handle this, love. Really.”
Settling down with you would be a dream come true. He does have his dream of finding the All Blue, but if you’re willing to come with him on that adventure, then the journey there would be just as much of a dream to him as the destination itself.
It doesn’t take him very long at all to decide that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you, and he’ll do anything to make that happen.
He’s quite cleanly and organized in general—having spent the better part of his formative years working in a professional kitchen, it’s become a force of habit. If something needs to be cleaned, to be tidied up or organized, he’s going to do so automatically, without even really thinking about it. He would much rather just see you relaxing, will probably protest a bit about you “doing too much” if you lift a finger to so much as sweep a floor.
You already know that cooking is handled. Cooking, kitchen maintenance in general. That goes without saying. Even if you enjoy cooking as well and you want to cook with him (absolute bonus, he loves cooking with you), he’s going to be right behind you wiping down the counters, washing and drying all the dishes as you go before you even have a chance to drop them in the sink.
N is for Needs (What do they need in a healthy relationship?)
“I don’t know how I ever survived without you in my life, sweetheart.”
Sanji can be a bit on the needy side. It isn’t that he lacks confidence, or that he absolutely requires constant reassurance—he just adores you, and wants to spend every minute possible with you, making sure that you know how precious you are to him.
If you’re near him, he needs to be touching you in some capacity. Whether it’s subtle, his hand resting at the small of your back while he stands next to you, or his arm curled around you and touching your waist; or if he’s pulling you back against him, arms around your waist or hands at your hips, resting his chin at your shoulder and pressing a kiss to your cheek, he always wants to be close to you.
Constantly telling you how much he loves you, showering you with praise for every little thing you do. If it gets to be too overwhelming he will back off—but you’re still going to catch him out of the corner of your vision with his own eyes glued to you, smiling and sighing as if you’re the single most incredible thing he’s ever laid eyes on.
That being said, if you argue about anything at all, he’ll be an absolute wreck, apologizing incessantly and begging your forgiveness; and he might need a fair amount of reassurance after the fact that you aren’t upset anymore. He can’t stomach the thought of upsetting you, because losing you would utterly devastate him.
U is for Unique (What’s something unique about them that no one knows but you?)
“It’s fine, just couldn’t sleep. Thought I’d get a head start on breakfast. You can go back to bed.”
Cooking is of course his passion—but it can, and sometimes does, double as a coping mechanism. He has a deeply troubled past, and every so often it might plague him in the form of nightmares.
In which case you’ll often  wake up to find his side of the bed empty; to find him in the kitchen in the wee hours of the night or morning, while everyone else is asleep, either prepping meals for the day or experimenting with new recipes to set his mind at ease.
He’s happy to accept if you offer to help, or if you just decide to sit up with him and offer your company. He’ll probably try to convince you to go back to bed, that there’s no need for you to lose sleep, but he’s not going to turn you down if you insist. It’s a gamble whether or not he’ll talk with you about what’s bothering him, or if he’ll keep a bit more quiet than usual while he immerses himself in his work. Either way, he appreciates your presence and your support more than you could ever know.
The menial, repetitive task of preparing ingredients in particular offers a pillar of stability and structure that helps him to breathe a little easier, to sort through that turmoil and make better sense of it; while the act of experimenting with something new helps steer his mind back to the present rather than dwelling on what woke him in the first place.
Y is for Yearning (What’s something that they yearn for when you’re separated?)
“Oh, no, love, I assure you, I definitely missed you more.”
It would be better to ask what he doesn’t yearn for. He simply can’t stand being apart from you, for any length of time. It isn’t that he doesn’t trust you, that doesn’t even cross his mind. He knows you’ll come back to him. He just can’t stand the length of time that you aren’t there.
Your touch, your scent, your face, your eyes, your body—your smile, your laugh, your voice, your embrace, your kisses—whether it’s minutes or hours or days that you happen to be apart, you’re the only thing that he can think about, having you back by his side, in his arms, safe and sound.
Life on the sea isn’t the safest, and he’s going to spend the entire time you're apart worried that something might happen to you. Even if you’re capable of handling yourself, he would feel much better being with you, knowing that he’s there to keep you safe.
And when you are together again, he makes it very clear just how much he missed you, all but literally gluing himself to your side, incessant in his insistence of how much he missed you, how he doesn’t ever want to spend that long apart again.
Even if it was only five minutes. Doesn’t matter, time is irrelevant, any amount of time away from you is far too long.
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writingonleaves · 3 months
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how can you look so peaceful when you know i'm gonna leave - joseph woll
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pairing: joseph woll x original female character
warnings: swearing, fluff central, talks of marriage, barely proofread
inspired by + title: "staying" by lizzy mcalpine
word count: 2.1k
author's note: a short love letter to long distance relationships, which, while brutal, are beautiful in its own way. a love so soft that its meaning transcends distance ... it's possible folks! i've lived it! wanted to put something quick out to get back into my writer brain again. i hope you all enjoy this one <3
Goodbyes are par for the course for Evangeline Patel and Joseph Woll. 
Their first real one was when they weren’t even dating yet. Something more than friends. Something just below commitment. It was after their sophomore year of Boston College, when Joseph went back home to St. Louis and Evie went back home to New York. Evie hadn’t wanted to let go as Joseph lingered by the door, having helped her pack stuff into her car. 
They were dating a year later during the second real goodbye, when Joseph’s BC season ended and he went to Toronto. But that time they had plans of visiting each other’s hometowns in the summer and the goodbyes felt more like promises and not finalities. 
When two collegiate hockey players date each other, they get more comfortable being apart than together with opposing practice and game schedules. But everyone knew, even at the start, that Evie and Joseph wouldn’t ever be driven apart by distance. 
And that stayed true through every ‘goodbye’ and ‘see you soon,’ whether literal or figurative. Through when shoulder surgery sidelined Evie and her dreams to go professional. Through when Joseph signed his deal with Toronto and Evie stayed at BC. Through when Evie’s post-grad journey took her back home to New York. 
They’ve passed every test thrown at them, every obstacle tossed in their way. As heartbreaking as it sounds, goodbyes are a part of what makes Evie and Joseph work. 
Because when they finally say hello again, it always feels like the first time they locked eyes, during a meeting during their freshman year when all the student athletes were gathering together.
Tonight, after spending their sixth year anniversary, they’re on the precipice of another goodbye. Joseph has to go back to Toronto for training camp and the Leafs don’t play the Rangers until late January. Evie always spends the holidays with her family, and Joseph has always respected that. 
Four months. They’ve done worse. But the familiar heaviness settles in her stomach as she curls up in bed, reaching out to place a stray hair back where it belongs. He looks at her in a way that makes her feel like nothing and no one can hurt her. 
It’s been that way for six years and she’s so lucky.
He narrows his eyes playfully, tapping his pointer finger gently on her forehead. “What are you thinking so hard about?”
Evie sighs with a wistful smile. “Nothing.”
“Oh really?”
“Yeah.”
He leans forward to press a kiss on her forehead. “I know you’re lying. Tell me.”
She relents, “I love you.”
“I love you too, baby. That’s what you’re thinking about?”
She shrugs. “Do you ever think about what life would be like if we didn’t have to be apart so much?”
“All the time,” he says. “I probably wouldn’t be as upset coming home after a loss.”
Evie chuckles, but that’s not what she means. “I mean, like, I don’t know. If you had thought about breaking it off when you went to Toronto or when I went to New York or…”
Joseph’s eyebrows furrow. “Is there something you’re not telling me?”
Shit. “No, no! Not at all. Sorry. I probably should’ve brought that up more gracefully.”
He grins. “That’s okay. You rarely think before you speak. I know that.” He earns a light slap for that. “But to answer your question, no. Not really. Even among all the uncertainties of going to Toronto, you were always the constant. I knew that no matter what changes would come, I’d always want and need you to be in my life.”
She feels her heart rush with emotions. Even after six years, he can still make her feel like a lovesick idiot. “How did you know that early on?”
He rubs her shoulder with his thumb. “You make my brain calm down. Even on our first date, my hands were so sweaty and I didn’t know if you were gonna think dinner was too cheesy but you just made me feel so at peace.”
“It was cheesy,” she points out as he lightly pinches her skin in retaliation, which makes her laugh. “But it was you. So I didn’t care.”
“Talk about cheesy,” he snickers. “But yeah. I never had a doubt. I knew that even though it was very likely we wouldn’t live in the same city, it would be worth it. It was more if you wanted it.”
“What do you mean?”
He swallows. She plays with his fingers, something that always calms him down. “Well, when I first went to Toronto, I wasn’t sure if you’d want to, you know, keep this going. And I would’ve understood. You were gonna be at BC another year and then be who knows where and I could’ve moved around at any moment. Not being able to give you that stability…it’s still something I worry about.”
“I think we’ve made it work this long,” she says playfully. 
“We have, and I wouldn’t change it for anything,” he assures. “And usually, I’m fine. But, you know, on the days I miss you more than usual, the thought creeps into my head.”
She catches his hand that’s been rubbing her shoulder and places a kiss on his palm. “Honey, I appreciate the concern, I really do. But I knew what I was getting to. And I’m still here, aren’t I?”
“I feel very lucky that you are.”
Sap. Evie lays back down on his chest. “That still doesn’t mean this gets easier though.”
“Yeah. I know.”
She glances around the room, stopping at momentos she’s collected throughout the years. The BC flag she has hanging above her door. The puck for the first goal she ever scored for the Eagles on the corner of her desk. A stuffed elephant Joseph won her in an arcade four years ago. A cork board filled with scraps of memories, tickets to concerts, boarding passes and little notes she’s gotten from friends and family. 
Right in the center is a ticket to Joseph’s first game in net for the Leafs. November 13, 2021. She’ll never forget it, getting special permission from her coach to meet the team at New Hampshire the next day for their game so that she could go up to Buffalo to catch the Leafs play the Sabres. 
Her eyes then scan to the bouquet of lilies on her night stand, courtesy of Joseph from when they stopped by a flower shop yesterday. Then to the duvet that he had gifted her for her birthday last year because she needed a new one. 
And then finally, to him. Those blue eyes that always hold so much warmth. The eyes she immediately saw when she woke up from her surgery, a professional hockey career officially out of reach. The eyes she always looks for in a room, whether he’s there or not. 
“Hi,” he says softly.
“Hm?”
“Lost you for a minute.”
“Sorry,” she shakes her head. “Were you saying something?”
“Nah,” he says with a smile, kissing her forehead. “Four months isn’t too bad.”
“Joseph,” she deadpans. “It’s not great either.”
“I know,” he murmurs. “I’m just trying not to be sad about it now because I know it’s inevitable. You think it would get easier after six years.”
“I hope some of the Toronto jobs I applied to get back to me.”
He sighs and she can’t blame him. It’s a conversation they’ve had multiple times. “Me too, Eve. But-”
“Go where the job you want takes you, yeah, I know,” she finishes for him. “But I’m ready for a change. And I miss living in the same city. Or country. Even that’s a start.”
Joseph snorts. “Yeah. That would be nice.” He reaches over to dim the lights. “Well, if anything, I’m glad we get to at least spend anniversaries together.”
She hums. They miss out on a lot in each other’s lives — her birthday which is in March, various holidays, Valentine’s Day — but anniversaries are in the summer. And that can be theirs. 
Sometimes Evie does wonder what life would be like if they weren’t dating. If she hadn’t taken the chance and asked for the shy, cute boy’s number. If she hadn’t realized at a BC men’s hockey game that the goalie in net was so talented that she couldn’t take her eyes away. If she hadn’t said yes to going on the first date. By then she had already known he was on his way to Toronto sooner rather than later. And she still said yes. 
She went to her childhood best friend’s older sister’s wedding a month ago. Her and Joseph have talked about marriage — they’ve been dating for so long it would be strange if they hadn’t — but it wasn’t until Paige and Taylor were saying “I Do” as they put rings on each other’s fingers, Paige’s jumpsuit and Taylor’s dress flowing gracefully with the wind, did Evie look at her own ring finger for a split second and yearn for something for the first time. 
Well, he’s leaving tomorrow. Might as well bring it up now. 
“You know, if we want to get married eventually, we probably should be in the same city.” She holds her breath, waiting for his reaction, fiddling with her necklace. 
(It’s a silver maple leaf charm that Joseph had gotten her right before he left for Toronto. Evie hasn’t taken it off since.)
“You’re my favorite person in the world.” He rushes out, almost like he’s stumbling over his words. But they’re no less genuine, eyes wide and cheeks the slightest bit red. She loves all of him, but she loves him the most like this. When he’s completely vulnerable, no filter and only hers. 
She has to share him with a whole city who lives and breathes hockey. He does a good job of reminding her consistently that even with all that, what’s theirs is theirs and always will be. It’s moments like these when she remembers. 
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. And I also know you very well,” He taps his finger on her forehead. “Just be patient, baby. It’s coming.”
She decides to act dumb, hoping she’s not clamming up. “What’s coming?”
Joseph snorts. “Yeah, nice try.” He takes it a step further, taking her left hand and rubbing her ring finger smoothly. “I knew I wanted to marry you the second your eyes opened after your surgery.”
Evie’s not sure what to be shocked at first. The fact that he immediately picked up on her signals or what he just said. She blinks. Surgery. Her shoulder surgery. Which was-
“That was like, five years ago.”
He shrugs before taking a deep breath, and she knows he’s also thinking back to that time. She didn’t know it at the time, but they’ve talked about it since. Joseph had been downright terrified, sitting in the waiting room for hours while Evie was in the operating room. He had flown to New York specifically to be by her side when she woke up. They hadn’t even been dating for a year and a half at that point, and he still says it was one of the scariest moments of his life. 
“Why then?” She asks. She has to know. 
He smiles softly. “I know it was stupid, and the success rate of that surgery is so high, but I was so, so afraid you wouldn’t wake up or it wouldn’t be successful. Then when you woke up and I saw your eyes, I realized that I don’t think I could go through my life without seeing those eyes. I guess it’s kinda cruel that I don’t literally get to everyday, but you know what I mean.”
“Oh,” she mutters. Because what else can she say? “So you do want to get married.”
A pause, then a bark of laughter. “Of course I want to get married.” She must flinch because Joseph immediately softens. “Sorry, babe. I’m not making fun of you. I just-I thought you knew. I’ve wanted to marry you for a long time. We’re just, you know, we’re young and I knew neither one of us wanted to be married young even though we could’ve been by now.”
Evie bites her lip. “You know that I don't need a ring, right?”
“I know,” he says with a warm smile. “But you’re getting one anyways. Soon. I promise. Can’t let you slip away that easy, eh?”
“First of all, I know you play there, but you’re not Canadian so stop with the ‘eh,’ he snorts before she continues. “Secondly, you kinda have had me for awhile now. Don’t think I could slip away even if I wanted to.”
He laughs before turning serious, placing a soft but poignant kiss on her lips. “I love you. I’ll miss you.”
“I love you too,” Evie says, biting her lip as she wipes a tear from his cheek. “I miss you always.”
(Three months later, Joseph proposes during sunset in Boston, echoing to their very first date when they had dinner and walked by the Charles River during sunset. Five months later, Evie gets a job offer in Toronto.)
~*~*~
tag list: @ru-kru, @bunbunbl0gs (lemme know if you wanna be added!)
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sequinsmile-x · 9 days
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Our Field of Dreams, Engulfed in Fire
She tells herself that she’ll get used to it, that the pain she feels over her friend's happy news will fade, but it only gets worse.
-x-
Hi friends,
This is truly up there with one of the saddest things I think I've ever written, so please take heed of the tags/warnings.
As always, please let me know what you think <3
-x-
Words: 4k
Warnings: pregnancy, miscarriage, stillbirth
Read over on Ao3, or below the cut
She laughs as her husband shepherds her into the conference room, his eyebrow raised as he passes her a cup of coffee as she sits down, her eyes narrowed when she eyes him playfully, “What are we doing in here? I have work to do upstairs you know.” 
“I don’t know,” he replies, sitting next to her, “JJ called the meeting. I’m sure Counterterrorism can live without their Unit Chief for 30 minutes.” 
She rolls her eyes and sips her coffee, “I’ll remind you that you said that next time I try and steal you away for lunch.” 
She’d moved departments just before they let everyone know about their relationship, not wanting any technicalities or rules to get in the way of them being happy and together. Aaron had asked her several times if she was sure, as if he was forcing her out of her job, and she’d assured him she was more than sure. A change had been what she’d needed, her desire to pretend everything was as it always had been when she came back from Paris wearing thin. She’d worked her way up in Counterterrorism quickly and often made fun of her husband for the fact she’d made it to his level so fast, a quip that he was clearly the troublemaker out of the two of them always on the tip of her tongue. 
Any response he may have, his smile full of mirth as he looks at her, is cut off as the rest of the team filters in all together, JJ rounding them up before she pulls the door closed behind them, nervous excitement written all over her face. 
“What’s going on, JJ?” Derek asks, sinking into a chair on Emily’s other side, “Can’t be work-related if Mrs Hotch is here.” 
Emily rolls her eyes, shaking her head as he hides his smirk behind his mug, “How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?” 
“Always at least once more, Princess,” he says, winking at her, and she can’t fight her smile. JJ clears her throat and they all look at her, her amused smile tinged with an edge of nervousness, “Sorry JJ.” 
“It’s okay,” she says, “I wanted to tell you all something and it’s almost impossible to get us all into one room these days.” 
Penelope sits forward, “We’re all listening.” 
Emily watches her friend carefully, the way she smiles widely, how her hand twitches at her side, almost touching her lower belly before she stops herself. Emily feels the ground beneath her disappear, her stomach rolling as she realises what her friend is about to say. It’s like her senses disappear all at once, the happiness and lightheartedness she’d been feeling just moments ago long gone as she reaches for the small pendant around her neck, a disc with an E carved delicately into it that Aaron had bought her close to two years ago now. She presses her thumb against it, feels the curve of the letter pressing into her skin, the sensation something she focuses on as JJ’s announcement rings around them.
“I’m pregnant!” 
She’s grateful no one is paying attention to her, because the joyful cheer from their friends makes her jump, the sound of it drawing her back into herself as she looks around the room. Aaron is still next to her, his hand now on her thigh, and she looks at him, their eyes only briefly meeting before she looks away, sure she’d fall apart if she let him look at her too long. 
She forces herself up, grateful for once for her upbringing, that she’d been taught the language of good manners before anything else when she was young. She congratulates her friend, hoping she doesn’t see past her smile that was only half fake, her genuine happiness for JJ clouded by the grief she could never quite pull herself away from. 
No one knows. She has to remind herself of it, that no one knew, that it was her decision that they didn’t, and it’s the only thing that keeps her in one piece. She manages to stay in the conference room for 10 minutes until she feels like she could drown in the happiness, the taste of it bitter as it washes into her lungs, and she excuses herself, hugging JJ one more time before she leaves. 
She knows Aaron will follow her so she doesn’t go far, sneaking into his office and sinking onto the couch as she waits for him, her eyes fixed on the floor. She isn’t there long before she hears his footsteps followed by the sound of the door to his office closing. He joins her on the couch and he purposely keeps a distance from her, always keen to make sure he takes her lead. 
“Em-”
“Don’t. Please,” she says, shaking her head, her gaze still fixed on the ground, “I just need a minute,” she begs and she’s grateful when he obliges, the room silent other than the clock on the wall. She reaches for his hand and squeezes it, grateful for the press of his ring against her skin, a reminder that no matter what she’d lost she still had this. “I wasn’t expecting that to…” she chokes on a sound somewhere between a sob and a laugh, “That felt like a gut punch.” 
“I know,” he says, lifting their joint hands to kiss her knuckles, “Same for me.” 
She turns to look at him, not surprised to find his eyes shining with tears too, “It’s been nearly two years. I thought…I don’t know what I thought.” 
The grief of it, of the babies she’d lost, that she’d never get to know, was something she was strangely used to. An old friend that lingered in every corner and had a seat at every table. A part of their daily lives she thought she had built herself back up around, but this had pulled the rug from under her, her friend's happy news leaving her unsteady. 
They’d tried for a baby for a long time. When she fell pregnant the first time, a sense of finally in the air around her as the test she was staring at had two lines on it for once, she’d felt nothing but happiness. It had been short-lived, a moment of joy brought to an end by familiar cramping in her back and bleeding that stained her thighs. She still remembered the look on the doctor’s face, a strange type of kindness in her smile as she told them they could try again. 
They did, and the second time she fell pregnant quicker, something she tried to tell herself was a sign things were going to work out this time. Her anxiety had lingered, all the fears she couldn’t outrun from losing her first baby still in the back of her mind, but as she entered her second trimester she relaxed. It was something she now cursed herself for, anger that she’d let herself believe she was finally going to have everything she’d ever wanted the very thing that made what was to come even more painful. 
No one knew she was pregnant either time, only Aaron and her doctor, and when she had nothing to show for either of them except for a broken heart and a box full of ultrasound pictures and tests with faded lines, she was grateful for it. Aaron had tried to encourage her at first to talk to someone else if she wanted to, but she’d only ever wanted to talk to him. To share it with someone who understood, and who already shared in the loss. The thought of having sympathy and well-meaning but empty words from other people enough to make her want to scream. 
“Want to talk about it?”
She shakes her head, “Not here,” she says, smiling tightly at him, “Otherwise I think I’ll start crying and never stop.” 
He nods in understanding, “Later? I can ask Jess to take Jack. We can sit in bed and cry whilst we eat all the candy from the pantry.” 
She laughs, the sound wet and thick as it catches in her chest, “You know me so well.” 
“You’re my wife,” he says, reaching out and tucking some of her hair behind her ear, letting his fingers linger on her cheek, wiping away a tear he otherwise doesn’t acknowledge, “If I didn’t know you it would be pretty sad.” 
___
She tells herself that she’ll get used to it, that the pain she feels over her friend's happy news will fade, but it only gets worse. JJ stops trying to hide it now she’s told them, the clothes she now wears to the office show off her small bump, her smile wide and happy whenever someone congratulates her. Emily talks about to Aaron about it and decides she needs to talk to JJ, to give her some context on why she was suddenly avoiding her, and why she’d come up with an excuse that sounded lame even to her ears when Penelope mentioned a baby shower. 
When she’s standing on JJ’s porch less than two weeks after her announcement in the conference room, Emily doubts herself. A moment of anxiety flaring in her gut before she forces herself to ring the bell, bravery she knows is fake washing over her as she waits for someone to answer the door. She paints a smile on her face when JJ pulls the door open, her surprise obvious as she finds Emily standing on the other side of it. 
“Emily,” she says, standing back to let her in, “I wasn’t expecting to see you.” 
“I wanted to talk to you about something,” she replies, her gaze drifting to JJ’s stomach, the t-shirt she’s wearing gathering around her small bump. Emily forces herself to look away, sadness and envy and so many emotions she isn’t proud of burning in her chest, “If that’s okay.” 
“Of course,” JJ replies, furrowing her brow as she leads Emily towards the living room, “Will is on bedtime duty tonight so you’re not interrupting anything. Do you want a drink?”
Emily shakes her head, “No, that’s okay.” She sits down on the couch and waits for JJ to join her, but when she opens her mouth no words come out, everything she’d rehearsed on the drive over stuck somewhere in her throat, threatening to choke her as she tries to figure out how to talk about something she’d only ever discussed with her husband. 
“Are you okay?” JJ asks, beating her to it, “You haven’t been acting like yourself lately.” 
Emily chokes on a laugh at that, unsure when she had last been herself. She felt adrift these days. Aaron and Jack and her routine the only things that kept her above water. She clasps her hands in her lap, putting more pressure on her own knuckles than necessary so she can feel something, anything, other than the empty ache low in her belly, “I…I don’t know where to start.” 
“Wherever feels right,” JJ says, her voice so kind it makes Emily want to scream, everything she’d been suppressing for days just below the surface. 
She nods and sighs, “A few years ago, just after Aaron and I got married, I was pregnant,” she says, clearing her throat when her voice catches on the word that makes JJ’s face fall, “Twice actually,” she hates the silence as JJ stares at her, so she carries on, “And I lost both of them.” 
It’s an unnecessary addition, she knows that. JJ knows she doesn’t have any children other than Jack, and Emily wonders if her friend is replaying interactions they’d had together and as a group from the last few years. How Emily’s smile and shoulders would tighten if one of the team mentioned little Hotchner babies, how Aaron would throw daggers at anyone who brought it up. Emily had always assumed they thought she either couldn’t have kids or had chosen not to, their curiosity slowly petering off as the years drifted by. Their friend's thoughts of them having more children disappearing, the hope and possibilities nothing more than flecks of dust in the wind. 
“Oh, Em,” JJ says, her voice hollow, like all the joy had been mined out of it, empathy rushing into it’s place like flood water that Emily does her best to ignore. “Em, I’m so sorry. You never said anything.”
“We…I mostly, decided we didn’t want to,” she says, “The first time we knew for a handful of weeks,” she smiles wistfully as she thinks of it, of a time of innocence she’d burn the world down to get back, “But then I lost it, I was about 8 weeks along. We told everyone we had the flu and took a week off work. The second time I was almost 18 weeks along,” she says, ignoring the shake in her voice and the gasp JJ can’t hold back. Emily is glad she’s sitting down, that she can’t be physically knocked off her feet by the wave of grief that threatens to take her under, “We were waiting until I hit 20 weeks to tell anyone. I woke up in pain and I was bleeding…and I just knew before the doctor even spoke to us.”
“How did you keep it a secret?” JJ asks, her curiosity winning out as she finally speaks, and Emily shrugs half-heartedly. 
“It was winter and baggy sweaters hide a lot,” she sighs, “When I…after I had the baby we took time off work again. Close to a month that time. I can’t even really remember what Aaron said we were doing. We went to Europe for a little while. I don’t remember much about it.” 
“He told us you both had leave Strauss was making you use,” JJ says, filling in a gap for her that she’d never quite been able to ask Aaron to fill, aware that she’d let him deal with a lot of the practicalities during that time, his own grief at their loss pushed down in favour of looking after her. 
“Afterwards, my OBGYN said she thinks the losses were because of my injuries from Ian. I had no issue getting pregnant, but staying pregnant until viability seemed unlikely. We decided to stop trying then,” she sucks in a breath, the air burning her lungs, “I couldn’t go through that again,” she laughs bitterly, the sound strange and wrong but she can’t help it, the thought she’d never been able to entirely shake off chasing it out of her chest, “I can see the irony in it. I took Ian’s son from him and he took mine from me.” 
“You had a boy?” JJ asks, her gaze a mix of shocked and sad that makes Emily’s stomach twist, a strange sense of anger she knows her friend doesn’t deserve rolling in her gut.
“Yeah,” she replies, “I had a boy.” She looks down at her hands, her focus on her wedding rings as she twists them back and forth, “Sometimes…sometimes I feel guilty that we’ve never told anyone else about him. But most of the time I’m glad we didn’t,” she looks up at JJ, her smile tight as she sees the devastation on her friend’s face. She doesn’t reach out, doesn’t try and comfort her, finding no room in her chest to take on someone else's emotions about it, “It makes him just ours, you know? Mine and Aaron’s,” she wipes a stray tear from her cheek, pushing it away with the heel of her hand as she turns away for just a second, “He’s just ours.” 
“What was his name?” JJ asks, the question slipping free before she thinks about it, her eyes going wide as Emily looks up at her in surprise, “You don’t have to-”
“Elliot,” Emily says, smiling as she says her son's name. A name she’d never call out in a park or hear as he crossed a stage at graduation, but she could say it here, her smile soft and sad as she grips the disc-shaped charm on her necklace, her thumb pressed against the engraved E. “We called him Elliot,” she feels her smile tremble as she looks away from her friend, the empathy in JJ’s eyes almost too much for her to bear, “Thank you for asking.” 
“Thank you for telling me,” JJ replies, resisting the urge to press her hand against her small bump, desperate not to draw attention to the very thing that had started this conversation in the first place, “Elliot’s a lovely name.” 
Emily sighs, the breath catching on all her ribs on the way out, the space in her chest that was left empty the day she lost her son aching in a way she knows would never go away, nor would she want it to. It was one of the few reminders she had that he’d existed. A hollowed-out part of her that would always be that way but that she’d learnt to live with. 
“I just wanted to tell you why…” she closes her eyes and shakes her head, her tongue peeking out to lick at her lower lip, “Why I’ll struggle to be involved with parts of this,” she swallows thickly, “Maybe all of it. And I’m so sorry-”
“No, Em,” JJ says, finally closing the gap between them and reaching for Emily’s hand, squeezing it tightly as she encourages her to look at her, “You have nothing to apologise for. Thank you for telling me. I won’t tell anyone, not even Will, if you don’t want me to. If I had known, I would have told you separately, not in front of everyone.”
“Thank you, and I know you would have. I guess I didn’t realise how much something like this would impact me until it happened. I am sorry though,” she squeezes JJ’s hand, “I’m sorry that I can’t be a better friend for a while.” 
JJ pulls her into a hug, careful to make sure she doesn’t press her bump against her, desperate to make sure she doesn’t upset her friend any more than she needs to, “No matter what, you’re still one of the best friend’s I’ve ever had, okay?” 
Emily laughs humourlessly and pulls back, “Okay,” she smiles tightly, her gaze drifting to the pile of toys in the corner, brightly coloured bits of plastic she’d only ever bought for her friend’s children, and she blows out a shaky breath, “I should go home, Aaron will be waiting for me.” 
They exchange hugs and goodbyes, both of them aware this would be the last time they’d be together like this for a while. Something that weighed heavily on both of them, but was the right decision, neither one of them wanting to hurt the other with things out of their control.  Emily texts Aaron to say she’s on her way back, and she’s proud of herself for making it back to her car before she bursts into tears. 
___
He’s waiting for her when she gets home, the house silent apart from the quiet of the TV that he switches off the moment he hears the front door open and close. She slips off her jacket and her boots and walks into the living room, her shaking smile doing nothing to distract him from her red eyes and puffy face. 
Aaron lays down, already knowing what she needs, and she crawls on top of him, wedged partially between him and the back of the couch as she presses her cheek on his chest, the sound of his heartbeat a comfort she’d never get enough of. He wraps his arms around her and one of his hands cups the back of her head, holding her in place as if anything could pull her away from him. 
“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks, his hand running up and down her back, the other still tangled in her hair, “Or do you just want to lay here.” 
She knew that what they’d gone through could have easily broken them apart. Both of them so weighed down by grief, so busy drowning in it, that they could have forgotten to reach for each other. But he’d been her rock, and somehow she’d found it in herself to be his. They’d held on tight and weathered the storm and come out stronger, her love for him now ten times what it was when she married him, something she would have at the time said was impossible. 
“She understood. I..I told her about Elliot,” she says, instead of answering “I didn’t know if I would but I did,” she feels him hold her even tighter, his kiss against her forehead firm, “It felt nice talking about him.” 
He kisses the top of her head again, “It always does,” he says, scratching at her scalp, something he’d done for her since those long nights at the start when she’d cried herself to sleep, “How does it feel to have told your best friend?” 
She smiles sadly and shifts so her chin is resting on his chest so she’s looking at him, “You’re my best friend,” she says softly, reaching out to run her fingers through his hair, “So my best friend has always known.” 
He turns his head and kisses her palm, “You’re my best friend too, sweetheart,” he kisses her palm again, “I’d ask how you’re feeling, but I guess that’s a stupid question.” 
She shakes her head at him, “Never stupid,” she says, her smile tinged with sadness, “It’s strange to think in another life we’d have an almost two-year-old.” 
It was a thought she could never outrun. A ghost of another life walking in tandem with her, forever tapping her on the shoulder and reminding her of what she’d lost, as if she could forget even for a second, whenever she saw a little boy who would be around Elliot’s age. A child’s loud laughter in public that would stop her in her tracks and remind her she’d never know her own son’s laugh or even his cry. A gap in her knowledge of him that could never be filled, the possibilities of what he could have been neverending. 
“I think about that too,” he says, tucking some of her hair behind her ear, “I wonder what he’d be into. What gift we’d get him for his birthday and what theme the cake Penelope would make for him would have.” 
She laughs, the sound weak and sad as it settles into her hollowed out chest, “When I picture him, I just see a tiny version of you. Right down to his eyes.” 
“I always imagine him with yours.” 
It’s a conversation they’d had countless times since the day they met and lost their son, and one she knows they’ll have for the rest of their lives. The what could have beens and what should have beens as painful as they were happy. Wistful and full of sorrow, as deep and full of unknowns as the sea. 
“I wish things could have been different,” she says, not even attempting to stop her tears, smiling shakily at Aaron as he immediately wipes them away, “I…” she drifts off, not sure that she could ever put it into words, and he nods, encouraging her closer so she can press her face into his neck, his tears splashing into her hair. 
“I know, sweetheart,” he says, because he did, he understood the loss because it was something they shared, something that was theirs, “I know.” 
“I’ll always remember what the nurse said,” she whispers, thinking of the kind woman who’d looked after them before they were sent home with a memory box they kept safe in their bedroom, “Clara. She told me that he’d only ever known love and warmth. That this world hadn’t had a chance to hurt him and never would,” she sucks in a breath and reaches for his hand, linking their fingers together, “I like to think that’s true.” 
He rests his cheek against the top of her head, damp with the tears he’d shed, and he holds her close, providing her with an anchor as he uses her just the same. 
“Me too sweetheart,” he whispers, “Me too.” 
47 notes · View notes
togenabi · 1 year
Text
by the window under the moonlight
inumaki toge x fem!reader ♡ royalty au
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♡—when sent to look for your brother, you find a handsome stranger instead.
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word count♡— 1.9k words
genre♡— fluff, royalty au
aged up characters♡— 18+
content notes♡— strangers to potential lovers, mutual pining, everyone is a prince or princes, older brother!gojo satoru, no use of y/n, love at first sight ish, very fluff, mc pins toge to the wall, toge writes a love letter, toge uses sign language bc I refuse to write shake or salmon in a royalty au, lets just say that mc is called princess bc their empire > the other kingdoms
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author's note♡— i desperately needed toge fluff, so i was motivated to write this! might be a bit wonky bc it's been a while since i wrote a fic, but i'm still happy with how it turned out ^^ enjoy!
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You don't know why you believed Satoru when he promised he would sit still at tonight's ball. Maybe it was because you were genuinely looking forward to it. Maybe you wanted to believe that you would have fun with your friends without having to worry about the troublesome crown prince.
But... he was your brother, and as it always was in times like these, you're sent away to find him.
Because he does listen to you.
...
To an extent.
...
When he feels like it.
Running your hands through your hair, you turn towards yet another empty corridor.
“Just where is that annoying—” Your grumbling is interrupted when you spot a head of white hair flit by the corner of your eye.
‘Aha!’ You rush immediately to follow the figure.
It quickly becomes clear that he's very good at dodging you and leading you in circles. However, you know this castle better than anyone, and you trap him into a corner soon enough.
“I'm surprised you fell for that. You aren't usually this easy to... catch...”
A beautiful stained glass window is fixed at the end of the corridor you led him to. The moonlight shines through it and paints the stranger in breathtaking colors.
‘Who is he?’, you wonder. You don't think you've ever seen someone so handsome... Despite an extended collar covering half of his face.
He meets your eyes and frowns. Though you only stand in front of him in confusion.
“You're not... Satoru.” You start slowly, trying to grasp the situation. “Why did you run from me?”
You hear several scuffling feet in the distance, and suddenly you're alarmed.
‘Shit, is this an ambush?’
The stranger seems to be distracted by the noise as well. Taking the opportunity, you sprint and tackle him, pinning him to the wall. This hallway is secluded enough that you're confident whoever's following you won't be able to find you if you keep quiet.
He looks like he's about to say something, but you don't let him.
“Shush!” You say. He looks bewildered.
A moment passes, and you realize that the noise was only from the knights rushing to look for Satoru as well.
You find yourself staying still despite having nothing to hide from the knights. ‘Why do I feel like I've done something wrong?!’
You take the time to analyze the man in front of you while waiting for the knights to depart. Though you can feel his strong build, he doesn't resist you. Perhaps he isn't particularly dangerous, or maybe he doesn't see you as enough of a threat to put up a fight.
The latter irks you more than you thought it would.
The noises fade, and you're about to loosen your grip on the stranger when you hear more sounds. This time, it's the boisterous laughter of those annoying, pompous delegates.
Annoyance paints your face just thinking about the ridiculous rumors they spread. If only they'd properly do their jobs instead of gossiping and pestering you to get married. Imagine if they saw you now, pinning this man to the wall. Why, they would probably chatter about it for years and—
You suddenly realize how... delicate your current situation is.
You panic, and the stranger tilts his head as if asking you, ‘What?’
“Shhhhh!!!” Before you could help it, you shush the man with urgency, using your hands to cover his mouth. You couldn't even begin to comprehend the international scandal that would unfold should you be discovered in this very compromising position—with a noble you've never met, no less!
“Did you hear that the crown prince disappeared again?” One of the delegates cackled.
“Oh my, again? Then was the princess sent to fetch him?”
“It seems so! But I hear she has been gone for some time as well! Ho ho!”
“Perhaps she has gotten tired playing her brother's keeper. I can't believe the future of the empire lies on the shoulders of someone so happy-go-lucky. Tsk.”
The voices fade. Holding your breath, you crane your neck every which way to see if the delegates have truly left. You finally spare the stranger a glance once you're met with a noiseless hallway. You sigh deeply.
‘This man would probably be angry’, you think to yourself...
You expected him to be mad, or to throw a tantrum. You waited for him to shove you off despite you being a princess—to demand an explanation and god forbid, compensation for the stress they endured this entire ordeal. That's how most, if not all, nobles were these days. Entitled beyond repair.
But to your surprise, you find him smiling. The corners of his eyes pinch as if he finds the situation very amusing. His shoulders shake due to laughter, and that's when you notice the color of his coat—a deep bluish purple... The color reminds you of the Inumaki clan, of the flag on the carriage you saw arriving this morning.
...
Ah. You let go of him.
His eyes glow with mischief as he watches you take in his appearance. The coat. The color of his hair. The purple eyes...
...The markings he reveals after he pulls down his collar.
You've played yourself a fool.
You back away from him immediately, clearing your throat and smoothing your hands over your skirt. “I deeply apologize, prince Toge.” You bow deeply.
Toge bows to you as well. Afterwards, he begins to sign a response. ‘You have a strong grip, princess.’
Your cheeks grow warm. Of course he decides to make fun of you. But then again, it was very rude of you to have literally cornered and restrained him.
“Again, I'm sorry.” You take a deep breath. “As you may have heard, I was looking for my brother. I only followed you because I thought you were him.”
His eyes glint wickedly. ‘And the pinning?’
“I-I was flustered.” You still are, but you curtsy to him and look to the floor to hide your expression. “Please excuse me. I must go.”
Toge watches you leave, and a smile blooms on his face when he sees your ears turning red.
He looks back to the stunning window at the end of the hall, and engraves into his memory how beautiful you had looked under the iridescent moonlight.
⋆。˚ 🪟 ˚。⋆。˚🌕˚。⋆
After trying (and failing) to find your dearest brother, you decide to return to the ballroom. You spot your trio of best friends conversing near the buffet table. Prince Megumi catches your sight first, and walks briskly to meet you.
“Where have you been?” He asks, and you think this is the most frazzled you've seen of the dark haired prince.
“I was looking for my brother, where else?” Your thoughts wander to prince Toge, and you subconsciously look around to see if he has returned as well. Your eyes find prince Yuji and princess Nobara approaching.
“When we thought you were taking too long, we left to find you.” Nobara explains. “But we ended up finding your brother instead.” She gestures to the end of the ballroom, where Satoru is sprawled on his seat next to the emperor's.
“Serves him right to look so bored. He's so much more trouble than he's worth.” You tsk.
Yuji catches your attention. “But I don't understand what took you so long, princess. You usually find him quickly, did something happen?”
Once again, your mind is brought back to Toge, and how he looked when you first saw him.
You must have taken a beat longer to reply. The three of them suddenly lean closer to try and read your expression.
“Are you alright?”
“Don't you dare try to keep whatever this is a secret from us!”
“So something did happen!”
They bombard you with questions, and you're suddenly overwhelmed. “I'll explain if you all let me, now will you?”
You pull them towards the wall, where there are less people, before explaining what happened.
...
You immediately regret doing so.
Your friends fail to compose themselves as they laugh. You're baffled as even Megumi laughs at you. He tries to cover his mouth, but it's too late. You glare at all of them.
“I can't believe you told prince Toge, of all people, to shush!” Nobara wipes her eyes with a handkerchief.
Yuji is still keeled over as he nods. “I would have paid to see that!”
“Now I understand what Maki and Panda were laughing about earlier, and why they kept looking over at us.” Megumi smirks at you teasingly.
“No!” You gasp. “They didn't!”
“Oh yes they did!” Yuji counters. “It all makes sense now!”
The trio seems to have regained their composure, but you're still a bit miffed. You refuse their offer to dance with you.
“I don't want to dance with any of you right now.”
“Oh shush, princess!” Nobara says, and they're caught in a fit of laughter once again.
But then their eyes shift to something behind you, and their next words get stuck in their throat.
You hear footsteps before you look over your shoulder. Prince Toge advances towards you.
He bows in a graceful motion, just as he did before. ‘I greet the princess of the empire. May I have this dance?’ He asks before holding out his hand.
You expected to be too embarrassed to dance with him well. But you're learning that your expectations are often wrong tonight.
Words fail to describe how wonderful it was to dance with him.
For someone who held him against a wall, the prince looks at you fondly. More fondly than you expected, and more fondly than anyone else has ever regarded you. His movements are confident and smooth as he leads you along to the music.
You want to apologize again, and possibly say that you're enjoying your time with him; but you have the strangest feeling that he already knows.
And thus, you stay silent, and let yourself be swept off your feet. The gentle melody plays on and contrasts with the erratic beating of your heart.
When the dance ends, he leans down to bring his face closer to yours. He takes your hands and brings your fingers up to cover his lips—reminiscent of how you had done earlier when you were hiding. You blush as he kisses your fingers while holding your hands firmly.
You find yourself unable to think of anything else even when the ball draws to a close.
You're unable to properly greet him goodbye, but you meet his eye when he looks over before entering his carriage. He nods, and smiles sweetly at you, the kind that reaches his eyes.
Your attention snaps away from him when Nobara demands you make her your maid of honor at your wedding, and you're left flustered once again.
⋆。˚ 🪟 ˚。⋆。˚🌕˚。⋆
A letter from him arrived the next day.
Dearest princess,
I realize I left you last night without apologizing to you. Please accept my apology now, though it may be late. You said you were flustered, and that was what led you to your actions last night. I'm afraid it was the same for me.
I don't know why I ran from you, or why I didn't bother to turn around sooner to confirm the identity of my pursuer. But now I'm certainly glad I didn't, for it has left me with memories I will surely cherish.
I will be frank. I am unable to stop my thoughts of you, and would like to get to know you more. Allow me to be the one to pursue you, this time.
In a few weeks, during the crown prince's birthday banquet, please let me steal you away for a while. I hope to meet you there again, by the window under the moonlight. I look forward to your reply.
Thinking of you,
- Toge
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⋆。˚ 🪟 ˚。⋆。˚🌕˚。⋆
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[PART 2]
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WIBTA if I asked my girlfriend to get me a replacement mask?
So I and my girlfriend (both adults) are in a long-distance relationship and live on different continents but visit each other for periods of weeks to months at a time. As background context, my girlfriend is notoriously bad with money - she's owed me over $1500 for half a year now after I covered some big expenses for her when she was unable to save in time, though I've told her there's no particular deadline for giving it back and to just do it when she's able, but she's also borrowed money from her parents, she's paying off a credit card debt, and despite having a full-time job she seems completely unable to save anything substantial and is constantly buying things.
We both like a certain musician, and this shared interest in the musician is actually how we met in the first place and bonded. They've dropped some merch in the past, and it always sold out within 5-10 minutes, and they're borderline impossible to get now unless you a) are lucky enough to find another fan who's giving theirs away, which is super rare because of how hard they are to replace, or b) are willing to fork out thousands of dollars for a resold one on some dodgy site somewhere. One of the merch items I got from one of those drops was a facemask, and my girlfriend has a matching one - I can't remember if it was something I bought for her, since I did that with some merch if I got there in time, or one she bought herself. It became a huge comfort item for me - I'm both autistic and have avoidant personality disorder, so I'm almost always in some kind of mask to hide my face, and this one being connected to a special interest as well as comfortable and a perfect size (and goes with all my clothes!) made me super happy. Last time she visited, we joked around about having identical masks but that it was easy to tell which one was hers because it had makeup stains all over the inside.
As she packed to leave, I mentioned that I couldn't find my mask anywhere and asked if she'd picked mine up as well as hers by accident, so she dug through her bags and said she didn't have it, only hers. I was kinda disappointed but I figured it'd turn up sooner or later so I accepted it, and she flew back home.
A few days later, she let me know she'd unpacked and discovered she actually did have both our masks. I asked her to send it back to me, and she said she would.
Fast forward a few months, I'd asked a few more times, and she always said she would soon. Eventually, when I asked one time, she told me she'd lost it. Her mother had tidied her entire room and she no longer had any idea where either of our masks were. I was kind of frustrated so I asked why she couldn't have just sent it over when I initially asked, and she snapped back that she couldn't afford it, which doesn't make much sense to me because she definitely does have enough to send over a flat envelope, which a fabric face mask would easily fit in just like a letter.
It's been a few months since then and I've been looking and looking for any kind of replacement, but all I can find are knock-off versions that are made from different materials or don't look the same. I did see one resold for like $20 ages ago, so it definitely happens, but it's so rare.
WIBTA if I told my girlfriend I'm expecting her to replace the one she lost even if it's putting more financial pressure on her? I feel really dumb for getting so upset about a mask, but it was one of my favourite belongings and it's genuinely upsetting that it was taken and lost.
To get out ahead of any comment saying it, I have full 100% faith that she did not do it intentionally and she didn't sell it or anything like that. She wouldn't have even thought about the possibility of doing that and I absolutely believe it was an accident and she just grabbed both masks or had been holding onto mine for me and forgotten it was in a bag etc.
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