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biblionerd07 · 1 year

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Btw if my Wynonna Earp spamming has inspired anyone to start watching (all 4 seasons are on Netflix, at least in the US), please be prepared for…let’s call it camp. Not sure if it counts as camp when I don’t think it was on purpose, but that’s what I’m calling it. The CGI is BAD. It gets a little better as the show goes on, but I’m warning you now. Sometimes the actors outside the main cast are……..less than stellar. (But the main cast is very good! Don’t worry!!) Sometimes the writing will unintentionally make you laugh, and there are some plot holes that never get resolved. BUT WITH ALL THAT BEING SAID: your payoff will be hilarity, kickass women who don’t fall into two stereotypical personalities, loving found family that will die for each other (and often make horrible deals with dark entities to save each other), and happy endings. It’s worth it!!!

#wynonna earp #like when I was rewatching I was like ‘my god I don’t remember it being this bad???’#but it’s about the relationships!!! and the love!!! and my main beloved Wynonna!!!!!#unkillable gays save for two demons in the early part of season one #who Wynonna then references as haunting her for having to kill then #I think some of the clunky writing is mostly due to the fact that a whole group of the characters are from the old west #so they kind of try to write them as talking old-fashioned #but it can come off really awkward #I also think that gets better as the show goes on #and the cast really really loved making the show and they all love each other and I’m such a sucker for that #everybody is who they are and who they are is just stone cold gay #even the characters who aren’t explicitly gay in canon are gay #honestly truly if you watched spn you cannot judge the acting or writing #and the payoff for Wynonna Earp is way way better too

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tswwwit · 1 year

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Wait, does the cheating thing on the bond always works? bcs that would be kinda freaky for R!Dipper like imagine you get pinned down by someone in the corner of a br or smthng and then said person kissed you and proceeded to explode into red mist and you literally have no idea what happened.

Also, would the constellation mark be a "cursed" Mark over the years, like you would give birth to a baby and the doctor says "😟 I am so sorry ma'am,,, I'm afraid your baby has the Cipher Companion mark. ( could also be something equally as science-y like Ursa Major, Constellation Calamation, etc idk)" And you just burst into tears.

Would that mean that dipper would get into a special program(demon wrangling program or smthng, demonologist? Maybe)? Or would the parents hide it away hoping that Bill would never take their child away?

(Sorry this au is just very interesting to me,,,, I hope u get more motivation, keep writing author 💪)

These are all options! The fun part of reincarnation AU being left ambiguous is that technically any of them could happen.

#Answers #Okay but for full transparency #I never really figured out what the 'cheating' consequence is #It's a nebulous concept since I've never had to write it happening #And left ambiguous because neither of these two are into anyone else - and as a writer I like to leave my options open!#I would assume that one of the few things they agreed on when making the contract was that unwelcome advances didn't count as cheating #But that the villain in question would get what was coming to them. Very Violently. They wanna step on a landmine? Let 'em have it #Dipper would have made a frowny face at the violence but agreed. Privately thinking well that's actually a *bonus*#A built-in defense system of sorts #(Something Bill was also thinking but absolutely phrased in the possessive aspect)#Whether or not the Consequences kick in before they meet again - their equivalent of their vow renewal - is up for grabs #Dipper trying to fend off someone only to have them burst into flames and/or blood would feel a terrified sense of relief #Who knows! Maybe Dipper has protection but has a chance for other actions before they meet again!#But the odds of that occurring are very slim. Partly due to his general awkwardness #And distinct hesitation on Dipper's part. Even though he *thinks* he should be enthusiastic #He looks at the person he's in bed with and just. It feels weird. Maybe because he hasn't (in his memory) done this before #Great job Dipper!! Someone in your bed and the best you can do is kinda grimace. Real sexy.#If he does ever manage to get up to something it's not even a tenth of the time he has with his husband #Dipper reincarnations are all very unfortunately attracted as hell to Bill Cipher and they're deeply alarmed by it #I do like the idea of different parental groups finding Dipper's birthmark and having different reactions #Perhaps a random incarnation of one of his family members ends up in charge of him one time #The results would vary *wildly* depending on who it was #On a scale of Mabel Mom to Ford Uncle how are you preparing this person for his invitable enhusbanding #(Stan remains pretty much the same but has a lot of bad marriage advice)#Wow that's a lot of tags even for me #I am going to queue this and sleep

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suffarustuffaru · 8 months

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I don’t speak Japanese so I’d LOVE to hear more about the differences between the English and Japanese Re:Zero fandoms

yeah sure its very interesting to me now that ive noticed it more lately :o !! though ok disclaimer - i dont speak japanese either hah so if anyone is seeing this and does speak japanese + is familiar with the japanese speaking side of this fandom please add info if youd like!! and of course ill be mainly speaking from the english side of things bc im more familiar with that yes (sorry anon again im not a japanese speaker T^TT so sorry if i tread on info you already know!!). but yeah im speaking from my own experiences given the Topic at hand. ive been in this fandom since... 2019?? which is so wild to me aljsdfljsd.

anyway so - i think the big difference is mainly that the english fandom and many english speaking people that engage with rezero are. to put it bluntly, misconception runs Rampant to a very Interesting degree. to the point where it seems like the english speaking side of the fandom is More. Aggressive. than the japanese fandom. not that the japanese speaking side of the fandom is perfect - also bc what fandom is ever perfect 100% of the time, tbh - but that the louder people in the english rezero fandom are. well its a Very low bar. Very low. and from what little ive seen and heard so far, the japanese fandom tends to understand rezero and its characters better than the english fandom. which ig makes sense bc you know, rezero is japanese media, and also im sure cultural differences come into play here as well (im not familiar enough on this to speak about it in depth but the cultural differences feel Pretty Clear even though i cant 100% put my finger on what they specifically are).

but also bc yeah. its not That hard to beat some of the english fandom when it comes to media comprehension. misreading rezero is unfortunately Extremely common, both in and out of the rezero community. its Everywhere - youtube, myanimelist, ao3, ff.net, reddit, twitter, various rezero discords - and from what ive experienced, rezero tumblr basically kind of feels like finding an oasis after crawling through the desert for days on end lajdslfjs. which is probs bc rezero tumblr is Smaller and also a lot of us seem to be lgbtq+ in some way or be allies, so you dodge a lot of the misogyny and homophobia that happens in other rezero english circles. its why you see a lot of openly queer rezero-related posts on here while its a bit more. barren. in other rezero english places yes. bc its more safe to post queer rezero things on rezero tumblr rather than rezero reddit for Sure.

im not sure how the japanese fandom is with that exactly but theres some interesting differences between whats popular in the english fandom vs the japanese fandom. i mean as an otto fan ive been noticing how hes more popular with the japanese fandom—and on top of that, ottosuba is Way More popular in the japanese fandom too. reinsuba and julisuba seem to usually be the most popular mlm subaru ships in both fandoms but ottosuba is like A Little Up There in the japanese fandom. not sure if its on the same level as a ship like reinsuba but ottosubas Definitely loved as a ship. from what little ive seen it also seems like ships like vichisha are more acknowledged by the japanese fandom? im not entirely sure on like—Complete differences regarding what the japanese fandom finds interesting that may differ from english fandom, so ill really have to look more into the japanese fandoms fanart and fanfic when i can bc im pretty curious too. in general though, it seems like the japanese fandom has a bit more variety…. you can find fanart on So Many characters in rezero (which already has a very Massive cast full of very fleshed out characters) there. not that you cant in the english fandom bc theres a Bit of variety too, but id more so contribute that a little more to the Big Cast and less to having actual variety in fancontent. and of course im not saying that the japanese fandom may be a bit barren in some areas of fancontent—bc inevitably when u have a big cast of characters, side character content is gonna be more sparse compared to the main characters, but to me it does feel like the english fandom lacks variety in comparison. (and also yeah. seems like the japanese fandom acknowledges gay ships more in general tbh.)

whats focused in fancontent makes it easy to tell what may be popular in a fandom in terms of how fans perceive the source material and what fandoms want to do with the source material, if that makes sense. and its very easy to tell that with the english fandom if you just hop on rezero ao3–or even better, rezero reddit given theres a fanfic ideas thread thats usually pinned right at the top of the site. again i havent looked at japanese fanfic for rezero yet (bc i dont know where to look oops ajdndn) but when it comes to the english fandom you can tell that theyre generally more focused on the female cast both in fanart and in fanfic bc. theyre women and many fans on say, reddit or various rezero discords, are cis straight men, so inevitably… well lets just say you can tell when a man makes content for this fandom o.o theres also the. very weird reaction fic trends and trends following popular fics in the fandom, the two biggest being the watching him die again and again react fic and re:forgotten, the former of which includes a harem plot with subaru and the main girls of rezero while the latter is one of those subaru gets tortured by his ooc friends and then he gets revenge on them fics. which i suppose says something about the english fandom too.

of course on ao3 its dominated mainly by english fics (of course not all fics on there for rezero are in english— big shoutout to all the non english fics on rezero ao3 ur doing great <3 — but the majority are in english). and while yeah ur occasionally gonna find stuff like queer content or side character content or rarepair content, its definitely not that big in amount and also comes with the risk of. Hate. if anyones reading this and remembers the lone star stuff. (if u dont know—lone star was a julius x emilia fic where they NTR subaru or some shit and then it got bombed with hate bc of the ship? yeah.) so yeah english fandom is very cis straight oriented, ironically with the nastiest people being the very people that rezero criticizes. though this is also my personal experience, i do know several people personally whove been in this fandom for a while or were here for a while and yeah english fandom isnt very welcoming at times???? and it seems like at the very least the japanese fandom is A Little Less Aggressive than the english fandom is.

otherwise. yeah im very very curious about more of the differences in popular content between the japanese vs english fandom. i mean the english fandom’s main focus on the female cast for. Interesting Reasons other than their actual character depth is… interesting. and the astreas being popular in general vs otto + ottosubas popularity fluctuating is also very interesting to me (but i have several guesses as to Why that is), among other things. yeah id love to know what else the japanese fandom likes about rezero and see more of their content. i also have to wonder if characters like emilia and subaru are hated less by the japanese fandom…. T^T well that and the english fandom and many english speaking people engaging in rezero have this interesting pattern of either hating subaru No Matter What, wanting subaru to Not Be Subaru (ie using him as a self insert almost or attempting to change him into virtually another character), or putting subaru on a pedestal and ignoring his flaws and mistakes and that he Can do wrong. like theres Really not a lot of nuance there. so i wonder if the japanese fandom is. A Little more chill when it comes to character opinions like this too.

#rezero #tldr: english fandom sets the bar so low (unless ur on rz tumblr) that the japanese fandom def seems a bit better by comparison #in terms of. Calmness levels.#every time i step into a rezero space that isnt tumblr i get a little worried my heads gonna get bitten off by someone HAH #recently someone tried arguing with me over how i interpret otto (this was on reddit) and then said stuff that showed they did Not #understand his character that well so that was awkward 😭😭😭#even just by looking at otto fanart from the japanese fandom it seems like more people understand his character there. in the english fandom #he is. either Not There or his flaws are just handwaved away or replaced with Different flaws #atm hes the most obvious example i can think of when it comes to. how differently characters can be percieved by different parts of a fandom #for rezero. like hes near invisible here but ottosuba being almost on the same level as REINSUBA in jp fanbase is crazy to me #kinda reminds me of the disney’s duffy and friends line and how it failed in the us but its SUPER popular in asia. really fascinating #and also yeah some of the english fandom seems. more loudly misogynistic and homophobic which is very unfortunate #also im sorry ill never forgive that random person on reddit i just said one (1) thing on otto and they came for my throat like fr 😭😭😭#ask #i do wonder why reinsuba is so popular but thats probs bc reinhards well loved too and also hes op. which is a bonus for the english fandom #bc theyre into all the power scaling stuff. and also reinhard gets the other bonus of being a guy and he isnt shafted by canon. hes treated #very sympathetically which is another bonus akdnsn #i say this as a reinhard fan btw but as an emilia fan im also crying bc theyre SO SIMILAR and yet why do people hate emilia….#but u know. reins a guy and we havent got his pov yet so there isnt much to hate.

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is-the-owl-video-cute · 7 months

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You’re totally right Tumblr doesn’t manage the for you section. But this is so fucked up

https://www.tumblr.com/elitefourkylewantstobattle/732071926522167296

Typically when things like this happen on here it is because the post (and person) were mass-reported.

Reminder that my original owlvid blog was deleted because of fatphobic weirdos spam-reporting my blog when I was making posts about BMI being made by eugenicists who wanted to make Americans look more physically imposing to other countries and that many people classified as “morbidly obese” by the scale do not have high enough levels of body fat to actually impact their health, and that BMI and similar “ideal weight” metrics don’t take the weight of muscle into account and the weight loss trend has caused millions of people to develop eating disorders throughout the years.

A video like the one posted in the link you provided is going to be controversial because zionists won’t like it and the wording used in the video is unfortunately very easy to make look antisemitic. The section of the video where the speaker started saying “this percentage of Jews think they’re smarter and better than everyone” or whatever does align dangerously with a lot of antisemitic beliefs, so because he didn’t continue to say Israelis or Israeli Jews to speak against this nationalistic culture, it makes it extremely simple for zionists to point to that and spin the entire video as being lies and antisemitic propaganda. That leads to mass-reports against it.

I don’t doubt staff has Zionist sympathizers among them simply because staff is largely if not exclusively American and it is very difficult for people in this country to access accurate information about the Israel Palestine conflict because the government sponsors so much propaganda supporting Israel and against Arabs and Muslims in general, leading to a large amount of Americans drinking the koolaid and believing Israel to be justified. However, there is also a good chance that this person and the post were mass-reported and taken down automatically because staff doesn’t always back-check to ensure someone or their posts were actually dangerous if they reach a certain threshold of reports they just terminate everything.

#Anyway #free Palestine #but also don’t phrase important information about the conflict in a way that comes off as disparaging Jews #anyone who uses zionists as an excuse to be antisemitic is just as bad as anyone using ISIS to be islamophobic #I see it a lot online and it’s incredibly dangerous because there has already been a terrifying uptick in violence against #Jews and jewish communities in a lot of countries recently #I am very happy Palestine’s plight is becoming more visible online now #but I am very cautious about how some have responded to this #because random Jews on tumblr shouldn’t get attacked or questioned by random gentiles assuming they’re zionists #and there have been little snide remarks against Jews I’ve seen on otherwise good posts about Israel that have prevented me from reblogging #Which puts me in an awkward position because I do want to be more vocally in support of Palestine on here #Because it is very important to me #but I really don’t trust a lot of the ways people speak about it #because there are a lot of people who take any excuse they can to be extremely antisemitic

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comixandco · 2 months

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my favourite part of season 5 is still the reveal that Gabriel and Tomoe thought Adrien and Kagami made the perfect pair and wanted them to be together because it completely flips their relationship

Kagami and Adrien sneaking around and finding the slightest gaps in their schedule and giving their bodyguards/parents the slip to spend time together and feeling so clever that they’ve gotten away with it their parents don’t suspect a thing

only to smashcut to Gabriel and Tomoe doing an evil pound it because their ship is canon

#miraculous ladybug #ml s5 #gabriel agreste #tomoe tsurugi #adrien agreste #kagami tsurugi #it’s the illusion of free choice™#it was a very clever plan tbf like if they told them to date it would be awkward and forced. but put them in the same room together and see #what happens… let them think it was all their idea… boom success!#then the next step is saying ‘yes i only just found out you’ve been dating kagami and i have decided to give you my permission to date her-#what do you mean you broke up a month ago and your dating the baker girl who made a hat for me one time?’#on the flipside though it probably wouldn’t have worked out in the long run bc kagami likes the thrill of a secret forbidden romance like #that’s partially what drove her to felix imo so if tomoe said one day ‘it’s come to my attention you’re dating the agreste boy. i approve o #of this match and have organised a date for you two on friday.’ you Know kagami would immediately go #‘oh no.. okay um so now i’m kind of feeling that everything about him that was attractive to me before isn’t really there anymore…’#also on the flipside like looking at it on a more deeper/serious level like it just goes to show how much control tomoe and gabriel have o #er their kids to the point that they would be willing to manipulate them into a relationship and then when #the two of them tried and realised it wasn’t working. instead of admitting they don’t know their children as well as they think they do #or acknowledging that their children are actual people who have their own feelings that don’t always match their parents #or coming to terms that their children aren’t extensions of their legacy and will that they can puppet however they want #instead they say ‘okay we tried the hands off way now we’ll just have to force them’

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tinylittlebab · 1 year

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ill be skinny. it will happen. ive been trying for so long now. once it was just trying to eat less and be smaller but not much real focus on my physical appearance. now its all about that. 11 years of my ed and 7 years of wanting what i want now. i dont live with my parents anymore. i have more control. i will achieve it.

there was a time where id eat 300-700 consistently. ill get that back. i will.

#most of the years ive had an ed i had no access to a scale so it was very jard to track progress #maybe i did lie my ass off and fool ppl around me into thinking its actually healthier for me to have a scale bc ill restrict worse without #one which is half true. not that kts anyones right to make that choice at this point. at least not in 2 months when im 18 its not #part of the problem im having is i wanna be small but i have so little muscle that ill have to be very dangerously underweight to look even #close to how i want. many peoples ugws are under that line. mine was once. before i learned that its genuinely very very dangerous #and a lot of the people who look the way i wanna look are only just below that line which is where id like to be #they look that way bc they have more muscle. most ppl cant maintain a bmi of 14 or less for that long. eventually your body freaks out #ppl use instances like eugenia coonie as proof that you can actually do it but like. most peoples bodies wont hold out that long #and many of the ppl in thinspo pics eother only maintained it for a short bit before gaining or getting really sick or they weighed more #and had more muscle. and like. my goal isnt to be all bone. i dont wanna push it that far. bony people arent physically nice to hold anyway #i just wanna be light enough that somwone cpuld carry me and people might view me in a certain way #i wanna be seen as cute and fragile and shy and like. young and sweet. ots hard to explain exactly what i want peopel see see me like but i #want when people look at pictures or videos of me for them to think i look sweet and wanna be gantle and nice to me #and when i walk around places instead of seeing an awkward weirdo they see a timid cute girl whos really tiny and pretty #i know ill never be that but. maybe if i lose enough weight and dont have much acne and leave my hair down then maybe i can come close

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on-wednesdays-we-eat-the-rich · 2 months

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y'all i think i just came out as genderqueer to my parents in the most casual way possible holy shit i'm so proud of myself but i also changed the subject very quickly so i wouldn't have to answer their questions because i'm not ready to do that yet

#genderqueer #i was telling them about some conversations i had with my friends yesterday #i figured if i can come out to my friends easily then there's no reason why i can't come out to my parents #they're already fully accepting of my sibling so i really had nothing to be scared of #i just hate coming out honestly #it's weird and awkward and i don't enjoy it #but this time went pretty well #gets a weight off my chest at least #trans #transgender #nonbinary #gnc #coming out

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vse-kar-vem · 4 months

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which joker out members have a deep and unhealthily personal attachment to the noah kahan song the view between villages and which of them are normal

#sprry this is such a bad post but im kinda going throigh it ☹️#listen i was either gonna post this or 'none of you think im weird right. right. do i seem strange and awkward and unerving im sorry :('#like i can barely talk to a person irl believe me im hyperaware of how i come off online #which is again weird and offputting 😢 and i cant rven use age as a crutch cuz there are people in this fandom younger than i am who are #doing fine #like i just feel so useless im not funny i dont draw that often or like brilliantly i dont have anything to contribute to intellectual #discussions besides rehashing stuff other people have said jn a worse and clunkier way #ugh ☹️#sorry this turned into the post i said i wasnt gonna make 😞#anyways to answer my post:#nace: yes (leaving home)#jan: yes (emo)#kris: no #bojan: maybe? i can see it going both ways because he's really quite sentimental ... actually yes #jure ..... hes a tough nut to crack because i really don't kbow much about his personal life #tentative no #vee rambles #was gonna go in the tag but because of the vent it's not. thanks me

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rosicheeks · 2 months

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What would be your perfect date? 😊

First date? Probably just a classic dinner at a restaurant or homemade meal. I want to get all dolled up and they actually dress up too and we spend the time getting to know each other.

#perfect first date and perfect date in general would be different though #I’m a hopeless romantic so I have plentyyyyy date ideas 😂#the one that comes to my mind right now is a paintball date #(specially thinking of the scene in 10 things i hate about you)#but really???#truthfully?#I want them to plan a date by themselves and just tell me when to be ready for them to pick me up #i wouldn’t really care what we did #just the thought of having someone actually spend the time planning and getting a date together?#that would blow my mind tbh #i wanna say I’ve been on like 3ish ‘real’ dates and I’m pretty sure I had to decide for each of them #if you know me you know I HATE decisions #so I think having someone know that about me and decide for me and plan it all so I don’t have to lift a finger??#yeah that sounds like a dream #for the first date I like the idea of just a classic dinner date so then you can kinda feel out the vibes #if we can talk over dinner and constantly have something to talk about (no awkward dead silences) then I’m sure I’d have fun #doing anything else with them #** also I was trying to reply to this ask while I was at work but it didn’t go well 🤦🏽‍♀️#every single time I looked down at my phone or started typing something would happen in my yard #so I had to set my phone down and take care of it 🤦🏽‍♀️#only one more shift left and then I’m outta there 👌#lol this is all over the place I’m sorry #I don’t wanna go back and redo any of it tho so here we are 😂#I just really want to go on a date in general 😭😭😭#I want to flirt and blush and get swept off my feet 😤#thanks for the ask sweetheart 🩷#ask #lovely mutuals

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ghostlyheart · 5 months

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I miss my dnd group so muchhhhh

#we haven't played for a while bc we're biweekly and Christmas fell on our normal play date #and we won't play again until next Sunday :(#I'm very fond of them it's been like 2 years and I was so nervous when I first joined but I feel very comfortable now #I mean as comfortable as I can be considering I'm always a little awkward and worried my jokes don't land or come off as mean or whatever #but yeah idk they're my buds!#I don't really have Close friends. more like groups (friends from high school; friends from college etc.) which I'm kind of insecure abt #but they've been a very consistent presence in my life and it's nice

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foxships · 5 months

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Maybe in 2024 I'll have the strength to draw selfship content AND actually interact more with people lol

#i feel like i come off as very awkward and strange when i talk to others rkshskshshsjjsk #i can understand why ppl dont really talk to me if i'm weird and not here as much lol #ANYWAY maybe i can AT LEAST start posting more art again!!#sanura rambles

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mrpsychokiller · 8 months

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i keep having embarrassingly deeper-than-they-should feelings about caboose that im not sure what to do about, with how i feel like i relate in a pretty genuine and sweet way to him in an autistic level and i do feel like reading him that way makes real sense but im just incapable of feeling very good about it when its very very clear caboose's neurodivergent esque behavior is applied exclusively to make the butt of the joke off how stupid he is. i care about him a lot as a character but i mostly just wanna rip him off r-slur-loving rooster teeth's hands and handle him with a minimum level of respect

#i dunno i feel about bad about it like if i even acknowledge my reading of him it comes off badly when once again hes the dumb one #going off topic onto a tangent i think i just yearn for a fictional representation of autism that isnt just easy and palatable #like there are lots and lots of autistic and autistic coded and autistic read/head cannoned characters out there #but it feels like its always just. nice character whos very nerdy about a subject or is kinda weird or awkward at times #its always just this ''high functional'' kind of autism where the proof theyre autistic are a few traits here and there #there just arent characters who stutter and mumble and get lost with words and sound weird and have weird voices #and say genuinely weird things in genuinely inappropriate times. who genuinely come off as weird or dumb or childish #who struggle with simple things or dont get concepts or instructions or things said at them #autism that isnt quirky or always fun or always endearing or easy to deal with or easy to dismiss #i cant think of a single character in media who i relate with in an autistic level in how my autism actually feels beyond the superficial #and i think thats why i get a genuine comfort in caboose of all things #in how unapologetically and undeniably weird and kinda dumb and kinda childish he comes off #and it isnt always nice and it annoys and troubles the people around him and of course himself beyond a way he can control #i get touched by the moments here and there when people actually treat him well #when tucker takes some time to gently explain to him that church isnt coming back.#and when hes given a sincerely emotional moment to say goodbye to church and well as that one episode of season 14 #or generally when characters are nice to him or talk in ways he can understand better #i dunno i just really do like him #which i guess just backfires when it feels specially hurtful when hes called dumb and stupid and is hated and threatened #and condescend upon and treated as useless and incompetent and just a burden the others need to take care of #mannnnn i hate rooster teeth #🧃

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coldvampire · 11 months

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#anyway the most exciting conversation I had today was explaining how I managed to fuck up the dog’s haircut #(he’s squirmy that’s it that’s the reason)#moving on though the main issue is I still need like. the crutch of being online almost #and I guess even though it feels awkward and lowkey uncool I’m glad there are apps for people just looking to find friends #downside is I can forget they’re there bc the notifs don’t work great #or I panic because I’m too hyper aware of myself with new people. why can’t this be easy what’s wrong with me #I get embarrassed by how much longer my replies are than the other person’s #I can’t help it I guess #if it’s short I feel like it’s coming off inauthentic so I overcorrect #but then conversation kinda fizzles anyway. which is okay! not everyone will be a winner and that’s fine #I know this and it makes me feel slightly better #still I just feel like. dumb I guess. in all these interactions.#that’s the word. because I’m perfectly comfortable with myself until I feel like i start to notice That Change in someoneone #anyone else who gets told they give off Uncanny Valley energy knows what this is.#like I can tell I did something wrong but on paper I did everything right #and I just kinda fold every time. bc there’s usually no salvaging a conversation past that point.#it’s Not that it’s easier to be alone bc I’m not having a good time clearly but something drives me to keep going despite it all #idk it’s stupid I wish I could just cut this feeling out and detach completely #I know it wouldn’t bother me to be pushed slowly away at least.#I’d really be the person who solved the lament configuration just to Hang Out lmao #I wish I didn’t make posts like these here btw.#that also makes me feel dumb but it’s like if I don’t at least put this down somewhere it’d be worse #I think tomorrow I’ll clean a bit. it’ll be something to do that has a visible result.#not like anything else that’s going on lol

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assigned-marcille-at-breakfast · 1 year

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Lol nothing like waking up to an email from a job telling me I'm "not fit" for a job I applied to. A job that is literally an entry position in the specific field I studied and got a college degree in.

Like not even like it's in the realm of what I studied. It's literally Exactly What I Studied. My degree is in it. I got my degree to do this. My electives expand on this specific field. I've been continuing to work in and learn more about and integrate into this field after college as a hobby. Like. This is literally what I live and breath.

From a fuckin smaller studio too not like some big major company or massive thing that has their pick of hundreds of skilled people. Like at least fuckin say some HR bullshit like "we are moving in another direction" or something.

Not a fucking fit for the position.

God I really am never gonna get a job beyond some bullshit part time shit that doesn't respect me or my skills and won't pay me enough to live huh.

Fuck me I guess.

#I was really hopeful about this one too #Idk what to do anymore #Like what is it that's making me so unemployable #Is it the fucking autism? Making me come across as awkward somehow or something and setting hiring managers off of me?#Or is the the being trans #Would I fucking get a job if I just #Stopped being trans #Lied to myself and went back in the closet #Pretended to be that person again #God fucking damnit! I've fought so fucking hard just to finally get here #But now there's a fucking chasm. And I don't have a fucking clue how to cross it.#And im doing everything everyone says to do to get across #But im so beat up and bruised from falling so many times. Broken so many bones. I've never made it more than a few feet across the chasm #And i can feel the fray in the tether that keeps me from plummeting to my death. The ridge of the cliffside cutting into it with every fall #One of these times it's gonna break #I'm worried itll be the next try that does it

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zahai · 8 months

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Is this a sideblog by chance?

Indeed it is. It used to be used as a primary blog, and I did intend to use it with at least some purpose even after I shifted my attention, but now it's just kinda mindless spam/things I find cool but don't have the spoons or words to give more attention to.

#if you're asking because you'd like me out of your notifications you can block my primary: off-brand-adorabbit #just in case that's what you're looking for but you didn't want to show your hand (:#I know mindless spam isn't everyone's cup of tea so I try not to be regularly awful about it #it's harder to be on good behavior when I'm sobern't though so....#I don't really have a point #I just wanted to make it easy to banish me if you wanted but then I worry that might be a mean conclusion to come to #I don't know who you are - intentionally and for good reason! You're using the feature for that which I fully support the use of!#that leaves me unsure as to why I'm being asked this particular question though because there are so many reasons why it might be asked!#do you not want me in your notifications but don't know where I'm coming from?#are you wondering why my blog seems to be fandom related but reblogs nonsense?#have you been monitoring my presence online for the last several years and you're a hair away from cracking some mystery that hinges on #whether or not this specific blog of mine is a sideblog or not?#or maybe you showed up here three minutes ago drunk and confused and are simply wondering who on earth left this weird pink hole behind #awkward wording there but I did set the colors and I will stand by my selection #anyways I hope any or all or no questions were answered by this submission #good luck!

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poppurini · 10 months

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Hi-ya! Sorry in advance for suddenly barging into your personal blog, (I haven't the foggiest notion how tumblr works, help me- ) (Truth is, I am socially awkward worrywart when it comes to socials, so i can't help but give a tinker's damn of how i sound like through speech-so-I SWEAR I AM NOT SOME KINDA CREEP OR SICKO LURKING INTO YOUR ACCOUNT JAKSJQK) Ok after this unuseful twaddle -shooting from the hip-the reason I wrote to you..sooo...I made a tiny eensy-weensy doodle of Lilia (sorry to break it to you- it's not some majestic drawing unfortunately) and...I thought I would show you as a token of appreciation for being the biggest Lilia simp I've ever known🫡 and also I LOVE YOUR CONTENT💋 *faint distinct sound of crowd cheering in the background* ANYHOW here's my homage to you :> (i know its not much but hope you'll like it, im not tryna be an arse-kisser help please)

PLEASE DON’T EVER APOLOGISE FOR SENDING IN ASKS I’M LITERALLY ABOUT TO PASS OUT RIGHT NOW ????????

AUGURHEURHEUSHEIAHEUER DYK THE MOMENT I GOT THIS ASK I WAS JUMPING AROUND IN MY ROOM GIGGLING AND TWIRLING MY HAIR STFU THIS IS SO SWEET I’M GONNA CRY 🥹🤍

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU !!! i love receiving interactions sm and to have u share me a doodle of lilia bcos my world literally revolves around him IS OFD SF FUNTNY TO ME BUT ALSOS SO SI CUTE ????? LIKE YES I AM THE BIGGEST LILIA KISSER EVER 🎪🎪🤹🤹🎢🎢🎠🎠

aLSO YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOUR LILIA DOODLE’S LITERALLY SO CUTE I SMILE LIKE AN IDIOT WHENEVER I GO INTO MY INBOX BECAUSE HE’S THERE POSING LIKE THE MOST UNSERIOUS PERSON THAT HE IS (AND I LOVE HIM FOR THAT) i’m gonna give u the biggest hug ever TAKE COVER

#I LITERALLY LOVE YOU FOR THIS #I HAVE IT SAVED IN MY ALBUM #BOTH YOUR ASK AND THE LILIA DOODLE !!#GONNA FRAME IT IDC #GIGGLING SO HARD RN #HEURHSUAHE LIEKR YOU THINK OT RNEM #YOU RHINK OF ME?????? ITS SOS SQEET OF YOU OTYJ RODDJ F #dw i’m a socially awkward worry wart too we can overthink together #YOU DON’T COME OFF AS A CREEP AT ALL YOU’RE SO FUNNY AND AND SOUND SO FUN TO HANGOUT WITH ??????? SCREAMS LET’S BE FRIENDS #thank you for loving my content i’m super super glad you like them!! 🎀#ILYSM #inbox.#ALSO IF YOU’RE REALLY UNDURE ABOUT HOW TUMBLR WORKS HOP INTO MY DMs I CAN TEACH YOU IF YOU’D LIKE :D

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