#but it’s affectionately because kai really is just saying shit

[vialae]

I know he holds himself to really high standards and would barely ever swear, but I do think Gortash would affectionately insult Kaidos and use super harsh names when it’s just the two of them

[sarcasticlcves]

Dating The TVDU Women Includes

Katherine Pierce:

You knowing her since 1491

Katherine turning you into a vampire, so you could both be together "forever"

Her being severely protective over you

Stefan and Damon going after you to get to her

You and Katherine both being chased by Klaus for 500 some years

Being shocked when Nadia (Katherine's daughter) shows up looking for Katherine

Comforting Kath when Nadia gets bitten by Tyler and is slowly dying

Both of you being stabbed with the traveler knife and dying together

A/n~ I cried making this one. I miss my bby Kathy 😭💔

Hayley Marshall:

You being a werewolf/witch hybrid

Klaus threatening you to not hurt his little or littlest wolf or you won't be able to see the light of day again

Being a stepmom/mentor to Hope

"When I said give it your all and punch me in the stomach, I didn't actually mean it Hope!" "Sorry mama..."

Being besties with Rebekah and Freya

Hayley being super cuddley

Her being super protective of you. Even going as far as to threaten Klaus and Elijah

"If I hear that you two idiots lay a single finger on y/n, I will personally bite your heads off! Got it?!"

*Klaus and Elijah nodding, scared for their fucking lives* "we got it" "we won't touch her, we promise"

Being present when Hayley throws herself and Greta into the burning sun

Despising Elijah after that day and never forgiving him (I hated Elijah after that. I don't care if he didn't have his memories or what)

Only staying in the Mikaelson family compound for Hope's sake

When Klaus died, you adopted Hope and moved to mystic falls so she could enroll in the Salvatore school

Raising Hope because you knew that's what Hayley would want for her

Hope Mikaelson:

Being a Tribrid like Hope

Knowing her since you both were little kids

Hope being very closed off and distant with you at first

Her slowly opening up and being more vulnerable with you as time passes

Hope being a very affectionate person behind closed doors

Hope being super overprotective

This bby also gets very jealous very quick

You being best friends with Lizzie and Hope despising your guys friendship

Dark! Tribrid! Hope Mikaelson:

When Hope goes full dark Tribrid, you were by her side through all of it

Even when she snapped Lizzie's neck right infront of you

When Lizzie got sired to Hope you got jealous and protective reallll quick

You even went as far as to kill your own girlfriend to break the bond between them both

And let's just say Hope was not happy when she woke up...

"You killed me because you were jealous?! Fine, let's see how you like getting your neck broken"

After all the arguing you two weren't on the best terms

Hope distanced herself from you a lot and her trust in you went to 0%

Yeah, I wouldn't recommend dating dark! Tribrid! Hope and pissing her off...

Lizzie Saltzman:

Being a Tribrid

Lizzie siphoning from you a lot

You being very protective of this sweet, sensitive little baby

You helping her through her episodes

Being present when Lizzie wakes up and turns into a Heretic

You having to teach Lizzie everything she could possibly know about vampires

Lizzie being very clingy and vulnerable with you

Going on a rampage when you find out Lizzie was sired to Hope

"I swear I will gut you like a fish Mikaelson!"

"Baby...calm down please.."

Hope knowing to not mess with Lizzie while your around

Jade Salvatore:

You and Jade both being stuck in the prison world together

Her humanity flickering when she's around you

She's VERY possessive

Not to mention jealous

You despising Kai Parker

"Oh, would ya look at that. I get to gut you again today"

"Well shit-"

A/n~ i didn't really have many idea's for Jade, so this was all I could come up with

[rendezvouz-fling]

Astro Observations #18

• I’ve noticed Water suns especially Pisces are really good at playing the Villain’s role in movies/series! They’re the types of villains you’ll easily remember and love to hate! E.g. Martin Kove (who plays the ‘no-mercy’ Sensei Kreese from The Karate Kid trilogy and the Cobra Kai series), Thomas Griffith (who plays the jack-of-all-trades eccentric Terry Silver from the 3rd Karate Kid movie and the Cobra Kai series) and Jacob Bertrand (Eli Moskowitz a.k.a. ‘Hawk’ from the Cobra Kai series) are all Pisces suns. Also Sean Kanan (Mike Barnes from the 3rd Karate Kid movie) & Dallas Young (Kenny Payne from the Cobra Kai series) who are both Scorpio suns.

• The main characters in cheerleader movies like the Bring it on series are mainly Leo and Libra suns while the mean girls are mainly Water suns. E.g. Solange (Camille from Bring It On: All Or Nothing) is a Cancer sun and Rachele Smith (Avery from Bring It On: Fight To The Finish) is a Scorpio sun.

• Venusians tend to be very attractive!! They might be known for their good looks and subconsciously or not might just have good taste in fashion/aesthetics.

• They can also be known as good singers.

• Aquarius moons are the type of relatives that distance themselves from the family as they grow older or they just go M.I.A. on their relatives lol.

• Aries placements are the ultimate ride-or-die friends. Prove me wrong.✋🏽

• Water placements are really good at drawing/sketching!! My mom is a Scorpio sun/mercury and my dad was a Scorpio mars and they both draw REALLY good.😭 No wonder it passed down to me (Pisces sun/venus/uranus).💗

• Water risings have such a chill, affectionate nature it’s really cute!!😩💞

• Capricorn placements are so hot and attractive for what?😭

• Aries suns with Virgo moons and Aries mercuries are so feisty and cute!! They’re very driven, humble and get so excited when talking about their passions!! 🤎

• Aries sun-Taurus venus men are the types to be into sports and music! Some of them love 70s music and might be into James Brown!😂💞

• We all need a funny, blunt, energetic Sagittarius venus in our lives!

• Taurus sun-Gemini venus men culture is playing video games 24/7 and saying funny things to try to make their crush laugh.

• No because I can assure you a Fire mercury/mercury in a fire degree, will always add in their 2 cents even if you didn’t ask.🤣

• Some Cancer risings with Leo moons might feel fulfilled when those closest to them start telling them they’re starting to mature more and they’re proud of them.

• Virgo moons with Aries mars and Cancer risings WILL call you out on some petty shit. They don’t like to hold stuff in.

• Christian Leo suns 🤝 trying to justify their actions with “but in the Bible it says’ every time they get into a conflict yet they’re being hypocrites themselves.😭

• One thing Air placements will do is try to talk/sneak themselves out of situations.🌚 “They used to pull me over and ask me out on dates.” Said by La Toya Jackson (Gemini sun/mercury and Aquarius moon/mars)

• Aries mercuries can be so passive aggressive lmao.😭

• Capricorn mercuries can also be clowns with their logical humors!😭

• You better believe an Aries mercury/rising is going to raise their tones if they feel like your not getting their points.

• Virgo moons hate lying and hate liars.

• Parents with Water/Earth in their charts especially in their big 3 don’t like to hit their children.

• Sagittarius moons will listen to what you have to say then add onto them in a slight philosophical sense.

• Virgo suns with Libra mercuries and Leo mars love talking about people’s outfits and mocking other people.😭

• Fire mars parents are the types to embarrass their kids in front of other people by arguing with them/calling them out on the smallest things while Water mars parents are the types to embarrass their kids around their friends by being too bold and sometimes friendly sometimes mean lol.😭

• Water/Earth mix in the big 3 to love animals and nature! My mom’s a Scorpio sun/Cancer rising/Virgo moon and she’s obsessed with cats lmfao!🤣

• Capricorn/10H placements and their good/hard-working reputations are so attractive!

• Virgo placements are normally the health nuts and might complain about the back of their knee hurting this week and their stomachs hurting when they’re full the next. 😭

[xxaraaq]

𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙧 𝘽𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙨

masterlist

wc | 1.6k

cw | infidelity, couch sex, age gap, unprotected sex, low key exhibitionism

Pool boy! Armin x MILF! Reader

A/N | Hey yall, this is lowkey shit but I just wanted to post something. I hope y'all had a happy new years, and as always, I hope y'all enjoy. Not edited.

A friend of a friend told him about the job, saying that you and your husband needed a new pool boy because the last one graduated. He was a broke college student in need of money for the summer. It didn’t take long for numbers to be exchanged and him calling you later that day. You picked up the phone with a polite hello and asked him who he was and what he needed. He said he wanted to apply for the position of pool maintenance. He was surprised at how quickly you said yes, wide eyes as you gave him the address and time you wanted him to come by tomorrow. He hung up with a quick thank you and practically jumped out of his chair. He had never gotten a job that effortless before, he just figured that you had gotten pretty desperate for someone to fill in the empty spot.

And he was half right.

But what he didn’t know was that the friend of a friend he talked to, his mother was friends with you, and as soon as she saw a picture of him she wasted no time to show you how cute your next plaything is. You’ve started to get restless since your last boytoy went on and left, and were itching to find another one to entertain you for the summer. Some might call it indecent, shameful, or even obscene; but you didn’t care. Your stupid, simple husband didn’t bat an eyelash about how you felt when he started sleeping with other, younger woman once he decided you weren’t worth his time anymore, so why should you care about his feelings? You loved the risky thrill that rushed through your veins at the thought of being caught fucking the pool boy.

 Was it wrong? Very much so. Did it make you want to do it that much more? Of course.

His first day went by smoothly, you greeted him with a hug and a kiss to the cheek as you showed him where he would be working and where the tools he needed were stored. He took note of your affectionate nature. He also noted the way your flowy sundress still managed to show off your curves, staring at your ass as you walk in front of him. He almost started making up excuses for you to stay in his presence longer, but you left before he could say another word. “You can just leave when you’re done. Feel free to come in whenever you need anything to eat or drink, kay’ sweetie?” You turn and walk away with a smile on your face as you feel his gaze burn into your backside in hunger. 

He came over once a week at first, but then your two boys started to warm up to him, asking him to come over more often to play football and play video games with them. He chuckled shyly and told them that they had to ask you first. You immediately said yes, ecstatic for having a reason to have him around the house more. He got comfortable being there, just like the last one, and you knew it was almost time to sink your teeth into him. 

You hadn’t failed to notice the way he ogled at you when you weren’t looking, you also hadn’t failed to notice how he would always find a way to touch you. You waist, shoulders, hips, anything he could get really. You wanted to laugh at the way he so blatantly made it clear that he would fuck you without a second to spare if you let him. You honestly didn’t expect how easy it would be to get him in your grasp. He virtually fell into your lap, simply waiting until you gave him the go-ahead to pound you into your mattress. 

It was another sweaty, humid day, and your kids were with their father who took them to some baseball game you could care less about. The only thing on your mind was getting Armin in your bed. He came over to drop off some extra fruit his mom had given him, a thing that he had started frequently doing. You thank with a warm smile as you set the basket of fresh cherries down as you welcome him in. 

Someway somehow, you persuade him to stay for a glass of wine. Conversation starts simple, talks of what he gets up to with his friends and such. Then he tests the water, asking how you met your husband. You’ve gotten drunk enough to the point where you don’t  have a filter anymore, and you tell him all of it. “It was a marriage of convenience, I met him when I was about your age, then he got me pregnant. Back then, if you got someone knocked up, you married them so that the kid wasn’t born out of wedlock. It’s such a stupid thing, and I only did it so that my father wouldn’t cut me out of his will,” you laugh, and he hangs onto your every word. “I only did it so that I have money to live on once I get a divorce.” You slur out, relaxing into the couch. “You’re gonna divorce him? From the outside, y’all look like the perfect couple.” You scoff at his statement, moving closer to him. His eyes drop down to your lips, then go back up to lock with yours. “Please, he’s been cheating on me for years, and the funny part about it is that he thinks he’s so slick with it. Add insult to injury, he’s basically a man child. He can’t cook for shit, he doesn’t clean up for shit – even though he makes the biggest mess, and he’s just a fucking idiot in general. I can’t stand him, and he’s not good in bed either!” You sigh in exasperation, and he chuckles as you finish ranting.

“You’re obviously done with him, and it doesn’t sound like you haven’t had sex with him in a while.” He says, placing his hand on your thigh. You look down at it, then at him. “What do you think, genius?” You lean towards him until your faces are only inches from each other. It’s sudden, his lips on yours and your hand on his cheek. You straddle him as he kisses down your neck. Your hands entangle themselves into his blond locks, pulling on them as you moan. Heat pools into your core as he slides the sleeve of your dress down, pressing open mouth kisses to your shoulder as he ruts up into your clothed cunt. “You sure you want me to fuck you here? they could be back soon.” He mutters as he unclips your bra, taking one nipple in his mouth as he fondles the other. You grind back onto him as you pull his pants just far down enough for you to pull his cock out from his briefs. “I don’t care, just give me what I want.” You stroke him, his groans filling the room as he bucks up into your hand.

He pulls your panties to the side as you position yourself above him, sinking down on his girth with a breathy sigh. His hands rest on your ass as you adjust to his size. “You ok, need a second?” He teases, and you glare at him. He’s the biggest you’ve had in a long time, and it caught you off guard. “Shut up and fuck me already. Isn’t that what you came over for?” His eyes darken with lust as he thrusts up into your heat, fingers digging crescents into your hips. Your arms sling over his neck, air getting knocked out your throat from how hard he fucks up into your pussy. He reaches down to rub small, quick circles onto your clit, and you grab his arm from the overstimulation. “Ohh goddd.” You whine, meeting his thrusts. He whispers obscenities into your ear, making you wetter by the second. “What do think your husband would think of you getting fucked by the pool boy, hmm?” He smirks, hand coming to pull you pack to face him by your braids. “A-armin, s’good, it’s sooo good.” You whimper, too focused on the pleasure to register anything he says. “You gonna cum?  Squeezing me like a fucking vice.” He grunts, thrusting into you with fervor. You could feel your orgasm coming, coil within you tightening by the second. Unused tears threaten to fall from your eyes from the pleasure as you ride him. “I’m gonna cummm.” You spasm around him, slick spreading on both your thighs. His eyes roll back as his thrusts get sloppier. “Cum in me. I want you to cum in me.” You say, voice hoarse from being so loud. “Ohhhh fuckkkkk.” He moans, spilling his hot cum into your sopping pussy. 

Heavy breathing echoes across the living as you slump onto him. Before either of you can say anything, you hear the click of the lock and the rowdiness of your family. You quickly push both you and Armin over the back of the couch, outside the view of the front door. You hear shouts and laughter as they make their way to the kitchen. “Where mom?” You hear your youngest say. Your eyes widen as you hear tiny footsteps coming closer. “Don’t worry about it buddy, she's probably out with some friends.” You hear your husband shout. You breathe a sigh of relief as we walk away. 

You wait until it's safe to usher him out the side door. “So about next week..?” You cut him off with a heated kiss before he can say anything else. “Don’t think this means that you can slack off on cleaning my damn pool. I expect it to as spic and span as before we slept together, you hear me?.” You say, eyeing him up and down. You leave him speechless as you walk away. He just smiles and shakes his head as he walks to his car.

He can’t wait to tell the group chat that he was the first one to fuck a married woman.

-Nene

[queer-ragnelle]

Hi there! Is there a retelling where Lot is a good, well-written character? So far I've seen he's usually portrayed as a full-blown villain or at least a complete jerk, and it makes me sad because I think that he is much more complex in the Vulgate and Le Morte (and also at the beginning in Les enfances Gauvain, 10/10)

Hello!

I'm a King Lot enjoyer and apologist, I got you. Good Lot is so hard to find. Actually the best Lot is trapped in a mediocre book, The Winter Knight by Jes Battis. He’s a single dad working constantly to support Gawain. It’s so cute. Sleepy depressed dad ily. But it's a reincarnation urban fantasy drowning in "quirky" modern references that really killed the vibes for me. Canadian Lot ain't cutting it. :^/

For a more medlit-abiding story, I like Lot in Bedivere by Wayne Wise particularly because even though Gawain (and eventually Agravaine) bend the knee to Arthur against his wishes, Lot is kinda proud of them for having conviction it was sweet. He was like "Noooo don't be your own men haha ;^)" And then he just....let's them do what they wanted without giving them shit for it. Refreshingly normal parent. He didn't fight [much] with Arthur either he's like, "Alright whatever me and my hot wife are going back north to the babies bye."

Lot and Morgause are both kinda funny in The Story of Sir Launcelot and His Companions by Howard Pyle just because Gareth is their favorite and they spoil him lol It actually made for a compelling kitchen boy story because it explains where Gareth gets his attitude which is what gets him in trouble with Kay. The whole court fawns over him to be in the king and queen's good graces and made Gareth a brat (affectionate).

Lot is barely a character in Sharan Newman's trilogy but he's a good dude and Agravaine is the only kid he actually sired so he likes him best. Surprisingly upstanding interpretation of them both. Here's a quote from The Chessboard Queen.

Not the step-dad but the dad who stepped up Lot? More likely than you think.

Lastly I wouldn't say Starz Camelot (2011) has a good Lot, but he's very sexy. He's in the first two episodes (and comes back as a vision in a later episode). He's definitely a bloody warlord killing whoever but he's really into Morgan. I mean duh, look at her. Things go downhill quickly but...James Purefoy the man that you are....

This turned into a long way of saying Gaheris is never the favorite kid. Anyway that's all the King Lot I have for you. Take care!

[merunair]

I got reminded BBCs Merlin exists and that spiraled into remembering a bunch of other really, really shitty adaptations of Arthurian canon and now I'm mad so I'm going to list some true facts about it that should hopefully demonstrate why adding "gritty realism" to it pisses me off so much

-Morgan le Fay serves as a Rita Repulsa-esque figure who throws problems at Arthur. She is also a wholly separate person to Morgause, the mother of Mordred. Morgan le Fay is a badass sorceress who's only motivation for being a Saturday Morning Cartoon Villain(tm) is that Guinevere snubbed her in some way.

-It's full of Welsh folklore, especially regarding faeries, and initially started as a recounting of a bit of Welsh military history before people started adding their OCs to it. It then broke containment and spread across europe, especially during the renaissance.

-Loads of the knights have superpowers. Straight up superpowers. Gawain gets stronger (and in some sources, bigger) the higher the sun is in the sky. Kay has some sort of fire shit going on... It's great. People would add their own guys to the round table and give them Cool Powers because they could. Though mostly it was just super-strength. This fell out of favor as it was Christianized because people are COWARDS.

-Lancelot is a French guy's OC, and despite the whole thing being full of those, Lancelot is the most OC of them all (affectionate). The second most OC of the bunch is a dude known for his edgy coat that he always wore that belonged to his dead dad (I am not joking)

-Half of the dudes are described as 'the fairest' or 'the most handsome'. Some have the caveat of 'second only to Arthur'. I legit read a description of how handsome a random knight was that filled a full page once. This is hilarious.

-There's a knight called Bedivere (he whose name has no set spelling) and he's my favorite. He has a prosthetic hand, is head butler, and is the only bitch to survive the big last battle in retellings that I respect. He's also one half of a comedy duo with Kay, also in retellings that I respect. I am admittedly biased because I played him in a middle school production of a really bad adaptation of a knockoff spamalot

-People just fucking murder each other on accident all of the time to show off how STRONK they are. After jousting got added they started having the horses die when lance met shield which DOESN'T MAKE SENSE but is there to, once again, show how STRONK the knights are.

-More on the note of casting, but there are dark skinned people in the canon. Specifically Moors (which is old europe for muslim north-african people with dark skin, a term not really used anymore because it wasn't actually one ethnic group but several). MORE SPECIFICALLY there is one explicitly biracial knight who's the son of one of the other knights and a (and I quote) "Moorish Princess". His name is Morien because people have never been subtle and was one of the knights for whom the tales waxed poetic about how stronk and handsome he was.

-Saved the best for last but this all gave way to the an early historical examples of larping and possibly kinning. King Edward the Third loved a knight named 'Sir Lionel' so much to the point where he'd hold big round table tourneys where everyone would larp as different characters from Arthurian legend (himself always being Lionel) and even named his son after him. The kicker? Lionel doesn't actually have that much in the way of story. He has like one story to himself and is functionally a sidekick in every other appearance I can find. King Eddy 3 had a Blorbo.

All of this to say that Arthurian canon is lovely and goofy and if I see someone make Morgan le Fay into Mordred's mom again I will spew fire and rain hot, bloody terror from the skies. I also think we should start adding OCs to it again and nobody can stop us.

[invisibleraven]

smiling when the phone rings and their picture pops up for Rulie because I am a sap please and thank you

Julie, as a rule, was not technically allowed to have her phone on her while she was working the register. She was supposed to be making coffee, restocking the sugar, and cleaning the tables instead of checking her Insta notifications.

However, she had all the mindless stuff done, the store was dead, and her manager was on his lunch break, so she didn't see the harm in pulling her phone out for a quick scroll.

She thought about shooting Flynn a text but she was supposed to be revising for her make up history exam on Monday, and if Flynn didn't scrape out a C her mom had threatened to take her phone away for a month.

Jule pocketed her phone when the odd customer came in, but the afternoon was dragging, and there was only so many times she could check the already full stir sticks and creamers.

Thankfully the boredom lessened when Kayla came in for her shift. "Hey Kay, what's new?"

"Same old same old," Kayla replied with a shrug. "Trying to not fall asleep reading Gatsby for Fernández's class."

"Ooof, I did that last semester with Clarke, I just listened to the audiobook. Thank goodness we're doing Shakespeare now."

"Ew, pass."

Julie's phone rang as Kayla slung on her apron, and glancing around to make sure she wouldn't get in trouble, she pulled it out, smiling when she saw the picture decorating her screen.

She and Reggie had taken it last summer at the lake, he had shaken off the lake water like a dog, making her shriek, then pulling him in for a snap, their smiling faces squished together. Reggie's freckles were out in force, along with a small tinge of red across the bridge of his nose from the sun, while Julie was sun kissed and smiling so hard her eyes were half squinted.

"Hey Reg."

"Hey Ju Ju Bean, did you finish the chemistry assignment?"

Julie rolled her eyes affectionately, "You know I did, I'm off in an hour so we can go over it then if you pick me up, save me the bus fare."

"Your car on the fritz again?"

"Stupid radiator overheated and papi is at an all day shoot."

"I can bring my tools if you want, give 'er a looksee," he offered.

"You're the best cariño," Julie said with a sigh. "See you in an hour? I'll even throw in a latte."

"Bless you and you knowing my love of caffeine," Reggie replied. "See you then darlin'!"

Julie ended the call, slipping her phone back into her pocket. She turned to apologize to Kayla, but the girl had a shit eating grin on her face which was...a little confusing. "What?"

"Girl I didn't know you and Reggie were like, a thing!"

"What? We're not-" Julie waved her hands at her. "We're just friends!"

Kayla looked at her, crossing her arms. "Jewel, I like you, but you suck at lying."

"I'm really not!" she insisted.

Kayla peered at her, then gave a look of understanding. "So you're not together. But you want to be."

Julie was sure she was flushed from this accusation, but shook her head. "Why would you say that?"

"The look on your face when you saw it was Reggie calling for one," Kayla replied. "I sure as hell don't look that dopey when someone I only see as a friend calls me."

Julie put her hands to her hot cheeks, shaking her head. "No, I just...I..."

Did she like Reggie? They had been friends forever, so she knew they got along. He was her anchor, her clown, her shoulder to cry on. Plus he wasn't bad to look at.

"I...I think I might like him," she said, quiet and subdued.

"Then go for it girl!" Kayla encouraged.

"No, we're friends... I can't."

"You can," Kayla insisted. "Because Jewel? He looks at you the exact same way."

"How do you know?"

Kayla just pointed to the parking lot where Reggie's truck was waiting, a good half hour early, a wide smile on his face and a soft look in his eyes.

Oh. Oh.

Kayla shoved her bag and a latte at her. "Go get your man."

"I'm not off yet!"

"I'll cover for you, now go!"

Kayla all but pushed her out the door, and Julie turned back to scowl before facing Reggie who was beaming, holding the door to his truck for her, that soft look never fading. Julie looked back at Kayla who was giving her a thumbs up, and then made a shooing motion.

"You're early," she remarked to Reggie.

"I wanted my coffee," he said with a shrug. "Come on, your chariot awaits."

Julie handed him the latte and got in, then looked at Reggie, who was still holding her hand from helping her up. Neither of them letting go until a car backfired up the road.

"Um, we should go," Reggie stated. "I wanna get that homework done before I looked at your car."

"Maybe after we could catch a movie?" Julie suggested, being bold.

"And a slice?" Reggie asked, looking hopeful. "Sounds like a date."

"Well what if it was?"

A beat, then-"I'd love that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." He shook himself then, finally turning the truck on. "Well let's go, if I'm taking you out then I gotta work fast."

Julie grinned, reaching out to take his hand as they drove off and resolved to buy Kayla a coffee their next shift together.

[veliseraptor]

July/August/September Reading Recap

look, it's been a wild time. that's all I'm going to say about it. but now back on the reading recap train and I'm just going to do all of these three months in one go because otherwise I really never will catch up (also read not very much for me in all of these months, individually)

Revolting Prostitutes: The Fight for Sex Worker's Rights by Molly Smith & Juno Mac. I read a lot of books over the last few months that I was kind of "meh" about, but this wasn't one of them. An incredibly nuanced, in-depth and very persuasive analysis of the history and present of sex worker labor rights - neither skewing too far into "sex work is liberatory" nor (obviously) the opposite. The authors consistently approached the subject positing (accurately) that sex work is first and foremost work, and should be approached as such in terms of the goals and needs of rights for sex workers. I already bought into the overall premise of this book, but it still remained compelling and educational for me to read, and I'm going to be recommending it to a lot of people who may be generally liberally-minded but have doubts or hesitations about decriminalization as a strategy that ultimately serves the best interests not just of sex workers but of society at large.

Bloodlands: Europe Between Hitler and Stalin by Timothy Snyder. This was a brutal book to read and I'm glad I read it. I like Timothy Snyder as a historian generally (I've read two of his other books before this one), and I learned a great deal here in particular about Stalin's policies, both in Ukraine and during the war. Some of the ground treaded in this book was familiar to a certain extent from Black Earth, but dug into more and in more depth, particularly prior to World War II itself (i.e. the Holodomor and other associated policies in the Soviet Union). I found the closing parts of the book about the politics of forgetting particularly compelling. Not a casual recommendation but a recommendation nonetheless if you're interested in history and up for the rough ride.

Witch King by Martha Wells. I was...not disappointed by this book, exactly, but a little underwhelmed. I wanted to like it much more than I did. Oddly, while I'm completely in favor of self-contained stories that close in one book, and I definitely liked Kai as a character quite a bit, the whole thing felt sort of rushed, particularly at the end. Everything was tied up a little too neatly, too quickly, for my taste, and in general some of the worldbuilding felt underdeveloped rather than (as I think was probably the intent) intentionally left underexplored in text. All in all, I had high hopes for this one that weren't quite met.

Where the Jews Aren't: The Sad and Absurd Story of Birobidzhan, Russia's Jewish Autonomous Region by Masha Gessen. I love Masha Gessen as a historian and writer and this was a short but intriguing book about an episode of history I knew next to nothing about - namely exactly what the title says on the tin. I'd recommend to anyone who has even a little interest in Jewish history in the Soviet Union in particular, though this one didn't blow me away quite as much as The Future Is History did (but that's a high bar).

From Below by Darcy Coates. Darcy Coates is rapidly becoming a favorite horror writer despite the fact that this is only the second book of hers that I've read. She does scary really, really well and this is some top notch ocean horror. Definitely a book that propelled me through all the way to the end and left me with some truly appalling (affectionate) mental images. Good shit, thanks for the rec @bereft-of-frogs (I believe).

Uncanny Valley by Anna Wiener. The conceit of not naming, just describing the tech companies under consideration in this memoir got a little tired after a while; this was an interesting book but probably would've been more compelling when it came out, before most of what it's exploring was common knowledge. But maybe that's partly because I'm just not really a memoir gal.

The Luminous Dead by Caitlin Starling. Another good horror novel, though I found the ending personally a little bit meh. But I'm really picky about my horror endings, so don't hold that against it. Caving horror is up there with ocean horror as far as subgenres I'm into, and this one did a great job with it. A good blend of visceral horror and psychological horror, though the descriptions of the caving suit were honestly possibly the worst part of it for me.

The Queen's Price by Anne Bishop. As usual the pleasure of reading Anne Bishop is about revisiting my old faves - it's like re-encountering old friends, which was what led me back to rereading the original series. I also did appreciate the rehabilitation of Saetien in this book, who took a beating in the last one that didn't feel altogether fair. I do not, however, know that I can forgive what it did to Wilhelmina Benedict my beloved, whose relationship to Jaenelle was and is very important to me. I don't accept this slander and am choosing to ignore it.

Imagined Life: A Speculative Scientific Journey Among the Exoplanets in Search of Intellgient Aliens, Ice Creatures, and Supergravity Animals by James Trefil & Michael Summers. It was fine and that's honestly about all I have to say about it. Wouldn't recommend it to anyone else.

Hex Wives by Ben Blacker. A fun little detour into a graphic novel about witches-brainwashed-into-suburban-wives that wasn't, ultimately, very good, though I did enjoy the lesbian immortal witches and the revenge fantasy of it all.

Monstress: vols. 1-4 by Marjorie Liu and Sana Takeda. I forgot how fucking good this series is. Reading it all together in trade form, rather than separated out month by month and issue by issue, only makes that even clearer. The way that Marjorie Liu explores monstrosity and outsiderness, the mingled brutality and tenderness of it all...Marjorie Liu is one of my favorite comics writers for a reason and you can feel her passion for this story.

The Black Jewels Trilogy by Anne Bishop. I regret to inform everyone that I still love this series and I probably will not be over it any time soon. I don't know. Sometimes a series that may objectively be not very good just digs into you as an impressionable teenager and then lives inside you in a very particular way forever, and I guess that's what happened here. The second book remains my favorite for the way it's focused on the coven and Lucivar (and their relationships with Jaenelle), which remains my favorite part of this series. I can't in good conscience necessarily recommend it. But I do love the damn thing.

Heaven Official's Blessing: vol. 7 by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu. Book 5 isn't my favorite section of TGCF, and this part of Book 5 is probably one of the sections I'm least interested in, with the exception of "deal with it yourself" which never fails to knock me out of the fucking park. It is just very important to me. But still, this book remains beloved of me and it's a treat to read regardless (for the fourth time, or whatever it is).

Qiang Jin Jiu by Tang Jiuqing. I keep describing this one as a classical military/political epic with a sprinkling of danmei and I think that's accurate. And that's what I love about it. Dizzyingly complex sometimes, with a large cast of characters and more conspiracies among them than you can shake a stick at, this is a delightful work of historical fiction with bonus gay protagonists, and I actually kind of love that the romance spends a lot of time taking back seat to the political drama. Also side f/f ship and Qi Zhuyin is amazing. Shen Zechuan is so unhinged but in a way it takes you a minute to notice and I love it.

The Pope at War: The Secret History of Pius XII, Mussolini, and Hitler by David Kertzer. This book was deeply infuriating, but in the way it was meant to be, in that it's all about the painful inaction of Pope Pius XII during World War II, and not just that but actively collaborating with both fascist governments in an effort to protect the church. I didn't find it very compellingly written - kind of a drag, if I'm honest - but boy did it make me very mad. The dedication to saving Christian/converted Jews while completely ignoring and doing nothing about the wider persecution was particularly choice.

Tangled Webs by Anne Bishop. Reread; not as good as the main trilogy, in my opinion, though has some fun stuff with Lucivar in particular. Probably suffers for me in that Surreal has never been my favorite, though she doesn't annoy me as much as she used to.

Thousand Autumns: vol. 2 by Meng Xi Shi. My main concern when it comes to this book so far is that it keeps promising me bad-wrong sex and I don't think it's going to give me bad-wrong sex. Or at least bad-wrong kissing, or something. The relationship between Shen Qiao and Yan Wushi is, at this point, a delightful trainwreck, though the larger plot of this book as a whole hasn't really grabbed me. I'm enjoying the read but it's not thus far a book I'd come back and reread later.

Underland: A Deep Time Journey by Robert Macfarlane. More personal story than the science that I was hoping for; it was still interesting, but in my opinion felt a little overwritten in places and definitely suffered in my estimation just for being not quite the right genre for what I was looking for. It was interesting, though, and still delved into some neat stuff along the way; I just didn't need it filtered so much through "one-guy's-journey" as it felt like it was. In general it's a delicate balance for me with books like this (about a writer digging into a subject); if the writer is too present then I start to get impatient, which is probably missing the point.

I'm trying to make October a month of spooky ready (or at least related-to-spooky reading) though we'll see if that continues or if I get distracted.

Reading The Earth Is Weeping might count as horror, anyway, in that it is almost certain to be very upsetting. Also on my shelf from the library are The Language of the Night by Ursula K. Le Guin and Ariadne by Jennifer Saint (whose Electra I read and didn't hate, even liked a little bit). I'm sitting on The Hollow Kind by Andy Davidson and The Death of Jane Lawrence by Caitlin Starling as two horror novels that have been on my shelves for a bit. We'll see what happens.

[cowgurrrl]

A come to Jesus talk with June

Alright, y’all some of you guys might’ve noticed I haven’t been as active on here especially when it comes to writing. Honestly, I’m in such a slump right now. Grad school is way harder than I thought it was gonna be and I’m still trying to get my feet under me in a new country with new friends and new work to do and writing hasn’t been something that’s come super easy recently. Therefore, I’m having a brief but very necessary break from fic writing. With everything going on with school, my org, my mag writing, and just life, I’ve been really stressed. I’m hoping to come back to it in a few weeks once I get a break because I do still have so many ideas and half-finished wips on the back burner that just haven’t been given the love they deserve. That being said, I would never leave y’all high and dry so here are some amazing writers/fics to binge during my break 😌

@pedrito-friskito’s Strawberry Wine: literally just go open the master list for this fic and tell me you don’t want to eat up every second of it. SW is/was a fic I read when I was still just kinda lurking on tumblr and not posting anything and it is beautiful. The way Kay writes is so intense and nuanced and incredibly, incredibly executed. I cannot recommend this series enough.

@swiftispunk’s Your Summer Dream: I think about this au at least three times a week because it is just that damn good!! It’s so fun and refreshing after reading so much angst and hurt/comfort to just have something a little sexy and heartfelt to read. Han is an absolute wordsmith and even though I’m recommending YSD, I truly recommend anything and everything she writes ever. Full stop.

@cupofjoel’s Keep It On The Low: DAMN I MEAN WOW this idea, this series, this writing is so impressive and hot and keeps you on your toes?? Not only that but it’s so emotional and soft and makes me say OW IVE BEEN SHOT I’m genuinely in awe of it every time there’s an update and I’m SO excited to see what happens next

@saintmurd0ck’s anything: Before I was a slut for Joel Miller, you better believe I was a slut for Matt Murdock and Frank Castle and THIS BITCH (affectionate) MADE IT SO MUCH WORSE Rhi’s account was also one I followed when I was still just lurking on tumblr and I love her work even though I haven’t fully regressed back to my Daredevil/Punisher phase (it’s coming (that’s what she said)) and I get so excited when I see her come out with something new 🥺

@softlyspector’s Adjustments: OW OW OW OW Adjustments reminds me of getting wrapped up in a warm blanket after you’ve been out in the cold in that it doesn’t completely take away the outside factors that have driven you to the comfort but goddammit if it soothe the ache a little. There’s so much angst but also so much love and comfort and found family and oshdkajdja i just love it GO READ IT NOW

@egcdeath’s Someone in The Crowd: take oftm but make it la la land coded and you get Someone in The Crowd!! It’s only one part but it’s so gorgeous and reflective and sweet?? I think it plays with tropes we don’t see very often in fic and that’s why it’s up here (Neptune, please come home from war the kids miss you)

Any and all of these writers are amazing and have great works outside of the ones I’ve recommended for you to read (and like and comment and share with them how much you loved them (support your local writer)) until I can get back to cranking shit out. Thank you for your patience and thank you to these writers and mutuals for constantly inspiring me to continue to create 🥺🩷 ilysm

[txt-ruby]

｢ 💗 ｣ — RELATIONSHIP with TOMORROW BY TOGETHER !!

CHOI YEONJUN ⋆ RUJUN

your typical big brother younger sister duo. Ruby cannot catch a breath without teasing him. Ruby looks upto him a lot and although she bullys (affectionately) him, she has mad respect for him. Often wondersnhow he puts up with her. Shows her affection in subtle ways that moves him to tears most of the time. He is very protective of her because one, he didn't have any siblings growing up and two he full on sees her as his own sister. Once even his mother refered to her as his sister. Used to share a room together so she knows all his sleeping habits and often blackmails him with it. Often seen cuddling in the corner in behind the scenes clips that make fans coo all the time. Act like they hate eachother but loves eachother very dearly. He would fight the world if he has to for her.

CHOI SOOBIN ⋆ SOOBY

He is just that caring brother type to bella. He often accompanies her in her daily walks and they talk about anything and everything. They often bitch about beomgyu together. Very protective (2) spoils her a lot in a way she can't refuse him. Knows her like the back of his hand. Catches her correctly when she's lying and when she's not. Knows immediately if she's feeling down or under the weather. Ruby cherishs soobin a little too much. Annoys the living crap out of him. Often playfully fights with him. Ruby is absolutely terrified of odi. She hates that poor creature. Refers to it as rat which often results in vocal arguments with the owner. But once soobin caught her petting odi and talking sweetly to the porcupine which made his heart feel warm.

CHOI BEOMGYU ⋆ RUGYU

both of them are equally terrified of eachother. If these both got into a first fight, we don't know who'll win or who'll lose. Ruby works out as his competition. Loves annoying the shit out of yeonjun together. Often they are seen in the kitchen at 3am making ramen and a shit ton of noise which makes the others really annoyed. loves making eachother laugh. Ruby absolutely loves his smile and vice versa. She confides in beomgyu a lot and he opens up to her too. Are eachothers pillars of strength. When ruby is down or under the weather, beomgyu is down or under the weather. Has a two year difference but acts like twins all the time. Beomgyu's parents absolutely love her.

KANG TAEHYUN ⋆ TAEBY

Ruby's other gym buddy. The original gym rats of the group. Ruby loves that they're the only braincells of the group. Loves talking to him as he bombardes her with facts and stuff. Often are seen outside by fans just going on about their day together. He questions a lot of things she does but still accompanies her to do them. He's just a year older but he feels like she's his kid. She loves hugging him and putting him in random headlocks. He loves to carry her on his back like a bag of rice. Ruffles her hair a little too much for her liking. She absolutely loves his smiles. She often reffers to his smile as her positivity pill.

HUENING KAI ⋆ RUKAI

Originally met him through hiyyih. Was surprised to know that they'd be debuting together. Did not get along in the first. We don't why but they did not like eachother. But it all changed when they opened up to eachother. Supports his plushie obsession like a passion. Often buys him new ones for random occasions. He loves talking to her about random stuff that makes her happy and to see her smile. Once revealed that he used to have a crush on her but that changed when he knew her real personality. (He got a smack to his shoulder for it.) The most spotted members outside together as they love cafe hopping together. Has a billion photos together. Whenever he smiles at her she says that the sun is smiling at her.

taglist: @stealanity @alixnsuperstxr @riikiblr

[boxboxlewis]

Something warm and comforting with maxiel?

Five career options Daniel considered and turned down after leaving F1, and one he didn't.

Adult entertainer

“My decanter sold out, right,” Daniel says. He’s sprawled on the sofa, staring up at the ceiling, high out of his mind: one of the few consolations of being out of F1. The vape is hot in his hand and he doesn’t want to get any higher right now, so he should probably just turn it off; it’s top-of-the-line, Blake’s baby, and he���ll be upset if it overheats and fries itself. But Daniel is so comfortable he doesn’t want to move, body heavy and syrupy, perfectly in tune with the sofa cushions.

“Yeah, mate. Well done on that,” Blake says loyally. “What, you want me to approach the vineyard about doing another partnership?”

“Nah,” Daniel says, “I was thinking more like. What if I did one of those things where I make a cast of my dick, and we could sell, like, branded DR3 dildos, but in the shape of my actual cock.”

There’s a pause, long enough that Daniel finally rolls his head so he can see Blake, who’s staring at him with an expression of ferocious concentration. “Mate,” Blake says, “you’re too high. Give me the vape.”

“I just think—people would love it,” Daniel protests. “I’ve got a nice dick. I mean, I’m pretty sure. Max—people have said. Five out of five stars on ratemydick.com.”

“Ohhh-kay, yeah. Yep. Give me the vape, Mr Adult Entertainer.” Blake wrests it from Daniel’s unresisting hand.

2. Crypto spokesmodel (again)

“...and that’s why we think you’d be the perfect brand ambassador for Gainz Crypto Exchange,” the smiling American guy finishes.

Daniel’s leg is jiggling underneath the board table. “Yeah,” he says, “thanks, but—”

Blake interrupts. “Do we want to like, talk this over privately before we make a decision?”

Daniel loves Blake, but man that “we” grates at him. He smiles, to paper over an awkward moment, and says, “Nah, I think we’re good.” He turns back to the American guy. “Look, I’ve done more some reading about crypto”—he’s watched a couple of Youtube videos and listened to half a podcast episode; close enough—“and it’s really not where I want to put my focus right now.” Because it’s a massive Ponzi scheme preying on unsophisticated investors, he doesn’t add. “Thanks, though. Good luck with the Gainz.”

3. Yoga teacher

“Breathe in, and create awareness to your chest,” the instructor says. She’s pretty cute. Very relaxing voice, too. Daniel breathes in, and thinks about his chest, as instructed: it’s definitely there. Chesting. Doing whatever chests do. Digesting air and shit. “As we reach for the heavens, imagine pure energy flowing down from the sky into your body.” Daniel obediently imagines a waterfall of Red Bull pouring onto his head, and he’s not an expert, obviously, but he’s pretty sure he could come up with some better soothing imagery than that.

After the class, he calls his sister. “Do I have a relaxing voice?”

“What?”

“My voice. Is it soothing.”

“What? No,” she says. “You sound like a millennial Australian guy who’s spent a lot of time abroad.”

“Ah, that’s too bad,” he says, disappointed. “You don’t think I should teach yoga, then?”

“Daniel, what the fuck goes on in your head, I swear to god." Michelle sounds affectionate but also is clearly laughing at him. "I mean, if you want to, I guess? I feel like the voice isn’t really the most important yoga teacher qualification though?”

This is a very good point. “Yeah, you’re probably right,” he says. “Thanks, Michelle."

4. Children’s book author

“What if I wrote a children’s book,” Daniel says. “Daniel and the Really Fast Car, or some shit. I bet kids would love that. They love cars, right?”

Kristen and Dax exchange a look, and then Kristen says tactfully, “Children’s books are actually, like, surprisingly hard to do well.”

“Yeah,” Dax says. “A lot of them are shit.”

“Dax!”

“Honey, relax! I’m not saying Daniel and the Really Fast Car would be shit. And you would like, hire a professional to help, obviously. Just… it’s probably not as easy as it looks, that’s all.” There’s a haunted look in his eyes. “I’ve seen scansion like you wouldn’t believe.”

Daniel doesn’t actually know what “scansion” means, so, maybe children’s book writing is a no-go. “Ok,” he says equably. “I trust you guys."

5. Memoir writer

Daniel watches as the ghostwriter his publisher hired thunks her head rhythmically into the tabletop. “Uh,” he says.

She stops thunking. “Sorry! I never get like this with clients!” She sits up, and looks at him. “Daniel! You are so charming and lovely, but has it occurred to you that maybe you don’t actually want to write a book about your life?”

“I mean… I do, though?” They already have a title: Daniel Ricciardo: Pushing to the Limits. He’s excited about it.

The ghostwriter says, “Daniel, I have spent the past two hours trying to get you to tell me literally anything about your childhood or early life, and you have given me.” She consults her notes. “An extended rant about Skittles. Your views on which candies have the most international appeal. A run-down of your favourite places to buy snacks in twelve different countries. A comprehensive explanation, with partial demonstration, of which UFC moves you think you would most rock. And an overview of your favourite bands.”

“Uh.” 

“When I asked you to give me a memory from your school days, you said, “Oh, man, you have to hear this new single,” and then got distracted by your own Spotify.”

Daniel considers this. “Ok, so… ah, fuck it,” he says. “Maybe you’re right.” 

“Yes!” the ghostwriter exclaims, relief in her voice. “And you know, this doesn’t mean you’ll never write a memoir! Just maybe that now’s not the right time.” She starts to gather her things together. “Daniel, thank you so much, I really do mean this—it’s been a pleasure.”

+ 6. WAG

“Daniel, I still do not understand why you’re so upset about not having a job,” Max complains. “You have plenty of money. And it does not mean, if you take some time out you can never work again.”

Daniel considers this, and tries to explain. “It just feels like—ok, how many years have I spent hashtag keep pushing? Fist emoji, fist emoji? And now I’m just, like, sitting around like a lump, doing nothing.” 

Max says, completely deadpan, “Well, we can talk about fisting later, but right now I think we should not be distracted,” and Daniel lightly chokes, but Max is still going. “You are not a lump, Daniel. You are a man who has worked very hard for a very long time, and now you are having a rest, that’s all.” He moves over so he’s leaning against Daniel, and wriggles his shoulder until Daniel lifts his arm and wraps it around him. “You aren’t that old yet. You still have time to do things. It is ok to just sit, for a while.”

Daniel sits, with his arm around Max, and thinks about what it would mean not to push, not to try, not to hunt to find the next thing. “I would basically be your WAG, you mean,” he says, and laughs. 

Max twists to look up at him, and he’s not laughing. “Yes,” he says simply. “I think that would be lovely, if you would not mind it. Just for a little while.”

Daniel pulls Max in tight against him, and kisses the side of his head. His heart feels all wobbly and uncertain, like one of those videos of newborn giraffes or whatever trying to stand up for the first time. “Do you really,” he begins, and then stops himself. Max never says things he doesn’t mean. “Ok,” he says, instead. Ok.

[fireflylitsky]

Hehe Shisui is apparently popular today XD answered that one here

Fixing Overhaul. Oh boy, what to say for myself on this one? 😂 I have no excuse. I'm down bad for Overhaul and I am throwing my very dumb, cute moth girl at his face like a sopping wet t-shirt. The plot goes something like this: Kai's childhood friend, whom he thought was dead, has just tumbled back into his life. She's disgusting, of course, what with that 'silk' quirk of hers. But he can fix her, he's sure of it. (joke is on him in the end)

Aaaaand a snippey based on a pet names prompt:

As far as pet names go, most of that is beyond cringe to Kai. But he finds himself calling her one thing in particular--only in his head so far. Not all the time or anything, but it’s almost slipped out once or twice. 

It’s bound to happen at this point with how much he thinks it, and within a week it does.

“Stay close,” he says, resting his gloved hand against the small of her back as they walk. Despite his aversion to people and their filth, he’s learned that he feels better when he’s got a hand in her in crowds like this. 

99.9% of people will take one look and know to keep a distance from her. The notorious leader of the Shie Hassaikai is a repellent of sorts, generally speaking.

It’s the .1% he needs to be wary of. The people that see his hand on her like it’s painting a target. Like he's just given them a fun new way to get to him.

Either way, he needs her to stay close, and right now she’s faltering, getting distracted by a string of lanterns hung on a nearby shop.

“Fuwa,” he says, ushering her to move along with him.

She absently stumbles forward a step, still enraptured with the dancing flames flickering within the lanterns. Pretty fire—basically her kryptonite.

“Fuwa, sweetheart, come on.”

She stops in her tracks, head tipping back to look up at him with big blinky eyes. Ah, shit. She’s going to make a big deal out of this.

“What?” Her head tilts in genuine confusion. “What did you just call me?”

“It’s nothing,” he dismisses. “Just a common pet name, now let’s go.”

“A pet name,” she repeats, confused. “So am I your pet?”

“No.” He snorts. She’s so literal sometimes it’s comical.

“So it doesn’t mean anything?” she questions, still not moving.

“I—no. Not really. It’s just a name.”

“Oh,” she murmurs, suddenly sounding dejected, staring at the ground.

Shit.

“It doesn’t mean nothing,” he amends, heat creeping onto his cheeks.

“I was hoping it meant you liked me,” she admits like it's nothing with a slant of her mouth.

“Fu…” he sighs, exasperated. “It does. That’s exactly what it means, okay?”

“Really?” She brightens.

“Yes.”

“Well, I like you too, should I start calling you sweet tart too?”

Kai actually lets out a small, scoffing laugh, caught off guard. “First of all, it’s sweetheart, not sweet tart. Secondly, no.”

“Why not? I like you too.”

“Well I’m glad for that, but it doesn’t suit me.”

“Why not?”

“Because unlike you, I’m not very sweet.”

“I think you’re sweet, Kai,” she says earnestly, brows bowing up. “I think you’re the sweetest.”

That's what worries him. It twists his guts up when she says stuff like this. 

“That’s… nice of you, Fu. It is. That’s exactly why the name suits you. Why don’t you come up with a different name for me?” There. That’ll keep her busy in her head for about the next two hours. Maybe now he can actually get her to walk with him.

“Okay,” she beams, clearly excited by the assignment. 

“Good.” He pets her hair down over the nape of her neck, giving it an affectionate squeeze. “Now let’s go. Stay close.”

She doesn’t answer, a look of concentration already painted on her face as she picks up pace alongside him again. Lord knows what’s going on in that mind of hers. He might regret this later, but what’s done is done.

[ninjamelissajulien]

Rewatching Crystalized after a long time- here are my thoughts.

The first third isn’t bad (season 1), honestly it’s still funny

Fugidove you weirdo (affectionate)

I still hate the mayor/the new ninja/ronin

Pythor you bitch (derogatory)

Nya my beloved, how they wasted your potential

Skylor my beloved, how they wasted your potential

Pixal my beloved, how they wasted your potential

Mechanic you motherfucker

HARUMI MY BELOVED CHILD YOUVE RETURNED TO ME

I hate how they changed the overlords voice, rebooted was the best version

I think the overlord intercepted harumi’s soul while it was on its way to the departed realm. Overlord can never truly die, so he’s stuck in an ethereal void. That’s why no one else was around

Harumi, my beloved scrimbly, your body was literally crushed and probably impaled by rebar and concrete

Oni temple still ugly as shit

“Fall of the monastery” is homophobic because my favorite girls got the shit kicked out of them and I’m gay so it’s homophobic

Also Pythor is misogynistic like bro Nya saved your ass from wohira

Also mechanic is misogynistic

Fantastic fights tho

MINI PIXES

I love the minipix 7 saved her mama first 🥹

We did not need the fakeout death for Nya

I love the samurai x mech and Nya’s Sam x outfit

I think they took off the overeffect on pixals voice in Darkness within - that just gave Crystalized extra bonus points in my book

Lloyd dangling sideways is so stupid but funny

Ok but like that wasn’t the last time you fought, technically that was the SECOND to last time shitlord, Zane killed you last time lmao

The coming 👀 of the king

But they didn’t lose??? They killed you???

Golden master was better tbh

Ah, the ugliest fortress in the entire series

Uglyass motherfucker

Harumi my scrimbly

Harumi really be like I hate you but maybe we could be friends but also no I despise you but maybe???

ACAB

Harumis such a brat- I love her so much

GARMADON RETURNS

Garmadon is the funniest motherfucker

The fact that they didn’t get to fully acknowledge Harumi and Garmadon is a missed opportunity

Christofern is an innocent victim

Mechanic motherfucker I want you to die

I forgot about Zane’s head trauma reverting him to the ice emperor. Such a missed opportunity

MISAKO MY BELOVED!!!!!

T*mmy fuck off

Pixal being a badass like usual. Queen!!!!

They put her effect back over her voice

JESUS CHRIST ZANE

ronin redeeming himself 🫡

Pythor you annoying bitch

SKYLOR YOU ARE A QUEEN I’d let you punch me any day

When skylor put her hand on Cole’s head, his scar was glowing

Skylor god I love you

Kai you got trauma we need to discuss

RACER 7 aka BLAZY H. SPEED!!!!!

I would burn everything for Pixal

Jennifer you say the word and I would kill for you

THE PIXANE SPIN

“You brought me back.”

Pixal has the coolest mechs because she deserves it

Garmadon sprint past, screeching, with a barrel is my favorite

“Uh oh? What does uh oh mean?” A callback to season 13 💙

“Pet plant” Lloyd that’s your brother have some respect

I’m gonna be honest- I forgot the overlord was the literal threat this season 😭😭😭

Why do the dragonites have tits????

I literally still can’t believe they have to “jump up kick back whip around and spin”

And the reveal was when the paper was “fold” ed you motherfuckers

Why did the coolest form of the overlord come TWO EPISODES AT THE END

Coles crew showed up

VANIA MY BELOVED SCRIMBLY

MINIPIX

MAYA EDNA BENTHO LOU (💔)

SALLY YOU QUEER QUEEN

Dragon form is literally so dope tho

I’m still not a fan of the “plot twist” with the overlord x devourer

Anyways KICK HIS ASS HARUMI GO BABY GIRL GO

Mechanic shut the fuck up honestly

OKINO

Cole mocking Vangelis is so fucking funny

It hurts to see Lou honesty knowing he’ll never speak again

ADAM

VANIA MY BELOVED

Is it me or is Kai really handsome in his dragon form

Cole and Vania’s hug 🥹

PIXANE SPIN 2.0

Oni Lloyd my beloved

ROTSM 2: Electric Boogaloo

I like to think that it is the ninjas spirits that protected Lloyd and defeated the overlord, not a golden power

Inner Steel is a good song shut up

Overall honestly not a bad season, has some hiccups and missed opportunities but not as bad as I think it’s judged

[the-dalseum-duet]

in dalseum angst and fluff are synonymous

obligatory “partipicant in the conversation that inspired this” tag: @svwhssftr

lots of things I have been thinking about just thrown into one big mess here. noeul sang the man that you are. I want to chop him up in a meat grinder and see what comes out (affectionate?)

also idk what possesses me when I write kai but it isn’t me who writes what he says. I think he actually possesses me

“You want a blue one?” Noeul rummaged through the plastic bin of various markers between him and Crow. All shades of the rainbow were scattered around his crushed velvet duvet. Before he could find one, Crow had already uncapped one with his tiny, nimble hands. 

“I got it,” Crow mumbled, attempting to hold Noeul’s arm in place as he intently scribbled within the lines of his Twin Fantasy tattoo. 

“You got it,” Noeul repeated. “Do you know what this tattoo is?” 

Crow shook his head, eyes transfixed on the tip of his marker. 

“It’s one of my favorite albums. You know, I think you’d like it. I’ll put it on for us.” 

Noeul snaked his arm away from Crow’s grasp to reach into the record bin beside his bed. He flicked through his collection before removing the vinyl from its sleeve and placing it on his record player. He briefly considered if playing “Sober to Death” was a good choice in front of his toddler, but decided the song itself was fine. He lined up the grooves before setting the needle. 

“This one’s my favorite song from the album,” he explained as he resettled into his bed. Crow simply nodded as he continued coloring. 

Noeul’s eyelids became heavy as he stared at his dark ceiling and stretched out his legs. For once, the world wasn’t closing in on him. Under the dull lamplight beside his bed, everything was okay. If only for a minute, everything was okay. 

He turned his head to the side against his pillow and watched as Crow began to color the wings of his moth tattoo. He knew the colors by heart: yellow, brown, and black. Noeul still wasn’t sure about the sensation of his own eyes— his father’s eyes— staring back at him. They weren’t clouded by scorn or disdain or any other rage that plagued generations of the Sang family yet. They were blank and entirely focused on coloring a bug. Noeul almost smiled but found himself half-scoffing. 

“Hey bitch,” Kai yawned as he swung open Noeul’s door by pressing his entire weight against it. “Did you remember not to eat any dairy today?” 

Noeul’s eyes widened as he rapidly glanced between Kai and his hyperfixated child. “A warning would have been nice.” 

“I thought Sonnet had her tonight.” Kai crossed his arms. 

“They had a busy day. Marie fell right asleep, but she wasn’t interested in that.” Noeul ruffled the top of Crow’s hair. “I’m letting her wear herself out.” 

“So, there won’t be any…” 

“Not tonight.” 

“You’re so lame,” Kai whined. “Actually doing shit with your kid. Why are you trying to be a good father?”

“Crow’s a good kid. She needs someone good to take care of her, at least sometimes.” 

“Hi, Kai,” Crow quietly said, his big dark eyes locking with Kai’s for a split second. 

“She knows my name!” Kai exclaimed, his tune quickly changing. He took a spot across from him and crossed his legs. 

“She really doesn’t talk much,” Noeul said. “You should be honored.” 

“I’m so honored,” Kai said, grabbing a black marker from the bin.

“I’m kind of worried,” Noeul explained. “Marie’s nearly speaking in full sentences in Khmer. Crow’s picking up a little bit of Korean, but she barely speaks at all. Even in English.” 

“That’s okay.” Kai started drawing on an empty patch of skin on Noeul’s arm. “Someone in this damn Palace needs to be quiet on occasion.” 

“Sara’s been dogging on me to get her tested,” Noeul said, “because Blaire was on the spectrum or whatever, so there’s a chance that she is. I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal, though. A diagnosis won’t change anything.” 

“She’s chill,” Kai said, nodding. “I don’t care what she is. I fuck with her. I don’t fuck with most kids, but she’s cool.”

“Maybe word that differently.”

“You know what I mean.”

“What are you drawing on my arm?” Noeul tilted his head to inspect Kai’s masterpiece. 

“It’s abstract,” Kai explained. By “abstract,” Kai meant a crudely drawn penis. 

“Very classy,” Noeul flatly said. 

“It takes years of practice to get it that symmetrical.”

“Oh, I’m sure.” Noeul rolled his eyes. 

“Wait, is this Car Seat Headrest?” Kai craned his neck to inspect the record playing. 

“I was explaining my tattoo,” Noeul said. “You have to teach ‘em young.” 

“I’ve never met a baby who liked Car Seat Headrest.”

“I don’t think she’s feeling it. She’s more of a Tears for Fears fan.” 

“Ooh, Tears for Fears?” Kai said. “Crow, what’s your favorite song?” 

“Rule the World,” Crow answered, a few of the consonants misshapen. 

“Damn,” Kai sighed. “Noeul, your baby’s a poser. Can’t even say the whole title.” 

“Let her have her moment,” Noeul said, playfully elbowing Kai. 

“She’s knocking herself out over there.” Kai nodded to the rainbow vomit that had covered Noeul’s tattoos, courtesy of Crow. 

“Oh, she loves this,” Noeul said. “She’s pretty good at drawing, too. Put anything she can draw with in front of her, and she’s going to do this for hours on end.”

Kai almost spoke, but he just tilted his head and grinned. 

“Magwi, tell him about what you’re coloring,” Noeul whispered, pointing at his moth tattoo. 

“A death’s head hawkmoth,” Crow said, pointing at it with the tip of his marker. Kai raised his eyebrows.

“Which ones do you like the best?” Noeul asked.

“The centipede,” Crow continued, “and I like the skulls.” 

His words were far from well-pronounced, but Kai could still piece them together. He rested his head on one of his fists. 

“Isn’t she something?” Noeul widely smiled, shaking his head to ruffle out his overgrown mullet. Kai had never seen him smile like that before. 

“I’ve never seen you like this,” Kai said, almost smiling. 

“Like what?” 

“I didn’t think you were capable of love,” Kai explained. “I just assumed you hated everything that wasn’t—“

Kai briefly narrowed his eyes at Crow before clearing his throat. “—carnal pleasure. I haven’t seen you this excited since we were dumb kids doing illegal shit.” 

“I don’t know, man,” Noeul said. “It’s kind of embarrassing to talk about, but this kind of shit changes you. I thought I was going to fuck everything up, but here we are.” 

“Do you like being a dad?” Kai slowly asked. “I just never pegged you as the kind of person who would.”

“Hated it at first. Now, I wouldn’t trade her for the world.” Noeul rested his forehead up against Crow’s, and he scrunched his little nose and giggled. 

Kai sighed. “You have to stop doing this, man.”

“What do you mean?”

“Being a better person. I forget you’re not all ‘Bend over, faggot-‘“

“Kai!”

“What?”

“She picks up on words crazy easy. She doesn’t even call me ‘dad’ or anything; she just calls me ‘Noeul’ because that’s what Sara calls me.”

“More like ‘screams at you,’” Kai mumbled. 

“She started saying ‘precious’ in a British accent because that’s what Gale calls her. She picks the weirdest words to cling to. I don’t think a slur is an appropriate choice.”

“It would be funny as hell, though. We don’t even know if she can reclaim that or not.” 

“I’m sure you would find it hilarious,” Noeul sighed. 

“But still, I had a point. She’s melting a soft spot in that fuckin’ ice-cold soul somewhere inside you.”

“Yeah, I think some of that nasty Southern charm is genetic. It’s hard not to fall into that trap when it’s framed as a kid who’ll listen to me talk about my pretentious music taste.” 

“Yeah, she gets it from me.” 

Noeul blinked. “What?” 

“She does. Did you forget that she’s mine?”

Kai devilishly grinned as Noeul nearly slammed his face into a pillow. 

“Now is not the time for one of your dumbass bits,” Noeul groaned. 

“What do you mean? This isn’t a bit. Of course, you wouldn’t remember because you didn’t show up to the birth of your own child. Fuckin’ whore.” 

Kai was almost afraid he struck a nerve with that one, but Noeul’s unimpressed expression eased Kai’s fear. 

“If you wanted me to knock you up, you could have just asked,” Noeul sneered. Kai’s jaw nearly hit the bed. 

“That’s enough.” Kai shook his finger as he pointed at Noeul. “I had all those organs removed as soon as I could. You know why?”

“Enlighten me.”

“Because you’re a freak who says shit like that and means it!”

“So you’re the only person around here who’s allowed to make jokes?”

“My jokes are funny. You’re not funny, Noeul. You’re insane.” 

“But here you are, in my bedroom in the middle of the night again and again.”

“Yeah, because I have to check in on my poor baby. My poor autistic baby.” 

“Kai, that isn’t funny!” Noeul laughed. 

“You’re laughing. It clearly was funny.” 

“Kai, you need to leave.” 

“What, am I not allowed to visit my daughter? My disabled daughter? God, you’re so ableist, man. I don’t want to split custody anymore.” 

“Take that to The Court. You’ll end up just like Blaire.”

Kai stopped laughing. “Noeul, we just went over you trying to be funny.” 

“That one was funny!”

“No, it wasn’t.”

“And you pretending to be the mother of my child is funny?” 

“You wouldn’t know. You weren’t there when she was born.” 

“You just said you had your uterus removed.”

“Yeah, because she took it with her.”

“Huh?”

“She got hungry. Late-night snack. Thought she would take it with her after she was born.”

“I don’t think that’s how that works.”

“It most certainly is how that works. See, she remembers. Crow, you remember eating my uterus.” 

Crow blankly stared at Kai. Kai subtly nodded his head, and Crow followed his actions. 

Kai cackled and clasped his hands together as Noeul pressed his fingers into his temples. 

“See, she knows! She knows I’m her mother.”

“Kai, I need to sleep. Get out of here.” 

“I’ve had my fun tonight. If I didn’t get to fuck you, at least I got to fuck with your baby.”

“Please stop wording it like that.”

“Bye, Crow!” Kai blew a sarcastic kiss before dramatically exiting the bedroom. Noeul glanced over at his son, and Crow was peacefully resting against one of the satin pillows. 

“I need to invite him over more often if he wears you out that fast,” Noeul whispered, leaning over to kiss his forehead. He collected the markers before admiring the colorful display strewn across his arms and removing the vinyl from his record player. 

If he had anything, he had Crow in all of his wonderful, weird glory. He knew a long night of sleep would be waiting for them after he dimmed the lamplight. 

[cosmic-ships]

♡ with Flip! GO GO GO! <3

Why do you both hate me!? Did I HURT you? /j /lh goddammit.. I'm tagging you both BUT DON'T READ THIS! >:c @ama-ships || @kylars-princess Thank you both for the ask lkdjfdlsk

SEND ME ♡ + A SHIP AND I’LL TELL YOU…

IT'S ----H e [zips hoodie up until it covers my entire face] sonofabitchthismandrivesmewild

Who is the most affectionate?

Flip 100% is more affectionate. He will scare the hell out of me.. he will backhug me with a "grah!" and bury his face in the crook of my neck and have one of his little giggle fits when I jump and tell him "Stoooooppp!!!" and be all whiny with him /lh

Who initiates the handholding?

me….me it's me okay! I cannot resist holding this mans hand- I might sorta like the look he gets on his face when I reach for his hand >///>

Who worries more for the other?

I worry about him constantly because of his line of work. He's always put behind enemy lines so to speak and things could go from 0 to 100 in the blink of an eye. Knowing he was going undercover somewhere always had me so fucking nervous. I'd never tell him I was worried but he knew, I know he knew because he would call me at least twice a day whenever he would get the chance too to let me know that he's okay and that he misses me aslkjdfldf

Who is more likely to ask for help?

LMFAO (help them /lh )

Who is the one always losing the keys?

Flip is! sometimes he's always in a rush and all I'll hear is "fuck…fuck! where are they? I just had the damn things!"

Who leaves little love notes for the other?

ME! Except like… things like "Please don't die today <3" "No you can't strangle your annoying co-worker" and maybe just maybe sneak two in that read "I kinda like your face <3" and "I love you, be safe 'kay? <3"

Who can’t sleep unless the other is there?

SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH It's me. If he is working I will worry but if he's just out late I will struggle big time to go to sleep. He has a very particular way of sleeping next to me that I've grown very fond of… code for he spoons me and pretty much bear hugs me like I'm a stuffed animal >///>

Who is more likely to propose to the other?

[CHOKES ON MY SPIT] I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE QUESTION HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Who introduced the other to their family first?

reiterating that my s/i doesn't really have family so he would introduce me to his family and yeah he would tease meeeee but then I'd whip out the ol' "Your son nearly killed me twice and arrested me for a crime I technically didn't start." to which he would snap "You finished it though" and I'd be like C:

Who is more likely to play with the other’s hair?

OKAY SO- Flip knows I have an extremely bad habit of when I'm really stressed out I will play with my hair, as I play with it, I do tug it a lot, he knows it will eventually give me a massive headache.. If he notices that I'm stressing in public he will give me a tight hug and give me a few head strokes and gently remind me to not pull my hair so much or if we are in private he wastes no time in pulling me to him or leading me to the bed or couch, he'll lay me down and HE will gently stroke my hair, run his fingers through it gently, or give me a nice little head massage so I don't end up hurting myself >/////>

Who makes sure the other has meals/stays hydrated?

"Kaden, energy drinks aren't breakfast and they sure as shit aren't water- You can't eat a small bag of chips and drink an energy drink and call it breakfast for fuck sakes!" "…pfft not with that attitude" "I swear to Christ- I'm making you breakfast-" (This is all /lh)

Who is more likely to stand up to anyone for the other?

Flip! He is incredibly defensive over me, like I tell him I had a bad day and his immediate response is "Who did it?" I try to defend Flip but he's so good at defending for himself that I just…add to what he's already saying? LOL

Who is the most likely to prepare a surprise for the other?

Flip actually can surprise me in ways I never thought were possible, probably because we don't think the other is in the stages of being romantic so when it happens we're like "Whoa~" and we're completely smitten with one another dlkjkldsfj

Who makes the other pinky promise not to do certain things?

"Don't die. Pinky swear." "Alright but pinky swear me you'll be mindful and pay attention to your surroundings" "Deal" Pinky swears "Lock it~" Kaden places their thumb to his and turns their hands while still in the pinky promise "What a dork."

Who puts a blanket over the other when they fall asleep on the couch?

Flip~ although he usually doesn't need to because I'm usually wrapped up in one of his flannels… cause you know, it's him being late + my inability to sleep so I will just snuggle with something that smells like him and end up passing out on the couch aldkjlafjlf

[astarab1aze]

🩵 hehe

muse relationship headcanon game

who curses more?

they both cuss a lot, but if i absolutely had to pick one of them? nope, still can't skjdfh they are both living embodiments of that one song by blink-182

who is more patient?

oh it's gotta be loux. i'm pretty sure it's loux. he's so - a way about things. like he could wait an eternity for kai to make up his mind about him, help him through his worst anxieties and experiences without so much as a sigh, like.

who does the driving?

um kai, obviously. and that's why he gets paid the big bucks :U (road head)

who is louder? who is quieter?

they're the same omg. they pop off, yell, scream, and generally just talk all the time skjdfh in certain contexts though, loux buttons the fuck up and kai kinda does the same a bit. they're just the same here

who is more physically affectionate?

this is a joke question because they're all over each other every chance they get, mutually. like loux wants kai in his mouth to some capacity in perpetuity, and kai has a slightly higher sex drive than loux. they cuddle and hold hands, but they be fuckin. they doobie doobie do bruh

who is more likely to tease the other?

no we for sure agree on this point. fully believe they get bonkers about it too.

who is better with time management?

well kai's a hitman so he's gotta be, and loux's a drug dealing mass murderer. they have plans and schemes and shit they gotta do so they both gotta be. right? right??

who wins the arm wrestling matches?

loux has too much respect for the spirit of competition. he's not using magic for this, i promise you. all natural, and he will lose gracefully.

who controls the music in the car ride?

loux. i bet he has so many hyper-specific playlists and oodles of music kai would not enjoy ksjdhf either way, driving down the coastline, sun setting a bright, righ orange, vibing to good music together? yes

who covers dinner when they order in?

it's one or the other and they don't really care who

who is more outgoing? who is more shy?

you said it best homie. these two are so outgoing! getting out there and living their best, highly dangerous, batshit ass lives. there are times loux observes more and is therefore quiet and reserved, but he's never ever been shy.

who has the more outlandish fashion sense?

loux 10000000%, i'll get the pins--

who starts the tickle fights? who ends them?

i always thought they both might start it and that it would absolutely end in them fucking. halfway through, they'd just start making out and the rest would be history omg

who has the darker/more “edgy” sense of humor?

they're both horrendous. awful. it's still a cod lobby in 2010 for them

who is more competitive when it comes to games?

loux can be very competitive, but it's entirely because he genuinely enjoys competing for whatever. games, festival things, cooking, like- it's that ambitious side of him, that need to win, prove himself. so i would say loux--

who has the bigger appetite? the bigger sweet tooth?

loux is a walking garbage disposal

who is more likely to get in a confrontation in public?

nah they jumpin the same guy together. they both throw down and would immediately

who hosts the parties/hangouts? who organizes them?

loux plans a lot of it. i don't know that they ever end up going anywhere...for obvious reasons sksksk loux is alll about kai the second he sees him again, nothing else really matters as long as they're together

who is better at cooking? do they ever cook for each other?

loux is like gordon ramsey and also an enormous pain in the ass when it comes to cooking. kai can just sit there and look pretty.

who is more likely to engage in dangerous and/or illegal behavior?

they met getting high and both kill people for a living. :I

who is more likely to notice when something is wrong with the other?

there's no way they're not both so completely in-tune to the other. they notice right away.

who does the talking in public settings (i.e. to the waiter at a restaurant)?

nah, they're both so individual and so loud and willful, they both just talk ok lol and are more than happy to piss everyone off doing it

who is more likely to extend a helping hand & provide emotional support?

i think they help each other in different ways that are both potentially toxic and fairly supportive, but i can't confidently say which one is more likely to do so over the other. it depends on context

who is the bigger prankster? do they get the last laugh or do they suffer for it?

loux goes balls to the wall and then fucked for it, i'll hear nothing else