#but like the process of making them??? the innovation???? that's what really fascinates me

[alittledizzy]

omg i’m always so curious about the behind the scenes of merch stuff i’m living for this dreambranding factory tour

YES.

Also this is not what you asked for but: it's also just such a fascinating comparison to Dan and Phil's merch company IRL Digital. And this is gonna come off negative toward IRL but honestly at this point I think there's really no getting around the fact that they had an amazing opportunity and totally fucking blew it. They could have had an empire, and they just - didn't. They didn't invest the money, they didn't invest the time, they didn't invest in professionals to run it that know what they're doing.

Seeing that tour of Dream's facilities and the way it was just flawlessly professional... I can't get over how this fucking kid, this twenty year old, was like I want to do this but I'm going to do it right. I'm going to make sure manufacturing is quality because I'm going to buy the machines and make my own manufacturing warehouse. I'm going to make sure the shipping is reasonable and fast. I'm going to hire support staff in multiple timezones to make sure customer support is taken seriously and if there are issues we communicate them. I'm going to expand this business at a reasonable pace and I'm going to treat new clients as if they're actual clients and not just my friends, even if they are my friends.

Like he really took them on an entire multiple facility tour, showed them every step of the process and let them know how their merch is made, had them ship orders. Yes it was fully kids on a field trip vibes but it's also exactly what you'd want if you, for example, are going to start expanding to people outside of your immediate circle. You give them an up close and personal tour of exactly what goes into the merch and that you know what goes into the process, too. Dream is a figurehead at the top but he's also the person that built the merch business from the ground up after being a content creator for barely more than a year.

I think Dan and Phil were happy with IRL for a while, and fans were proud of their innovation... for a while. But it stopped being innovative a lot of years ago, and that missed potential is just very fucking tragic to me.

[the-warmesthello]

barb

putting a tw at the beginning of this because i probably should. tw for religious trauma (including some mormon terminology), mention of fungi, homophobia (including derogatory use of the word queer), dysfunctional parenting, grief/mourning, alcoholism, bad mental health times all round, some tough parts of the therapeutic process

really i didn't expect this to get heavy part way through so if you want to skip the worst bit (aftermath of the banana incident), it's most of the next rb. :)

(btw i am nevermo, correct me if i got something wrong)

born on the 21st of december, 1934 in provo, utah

was raised in the latter day saints

had a keen interest in chemistry from the time she could express it, but because sciences were discouraged for the girls in her family, learned mostly about the science in domestic work

amazing baker, had the exact ratios for each ingredient memorised by the time she started school

became fascinated by fermentation and saw the scoby and starters as her pets, watching them make bubbles for hours on end

learned the old burning-things-with-a-magnifying-glass trick, but only used it for leaves because the ants didn't deserve that

one time when she was 6, she made chloroform out of cleaning chemicals, put it in a glass bottle, and smashed it in front of her bullies to see what would happen

(she got in trouble for that)

(worth it)

just before school started, her parents noticed that she would always hold books very close to her face, amongst other things, and when they took her to the doctor she became the proud owner of some incredibly nifty glasses, if she did say so herself

only had one friend in school, alma merrill, who she thought was kind and funny and beautiful and...

just the greatest

even though she didn't understand what barb meant when she talked about exothermic reactions, she'd still sit there and nod along, and she had so many exciting things to say in return even though it wasn't what barb usually liked

when she grew up, she wanted her husband to be just like alma

when they were 13, alma was told to stay away from her because she was 'queer, and not only in the loony way' (neither barb nor alma could figure out what that meant)

after that, she focused most of her time on her studies, which her parents were now suddenly encouraging of

("at least it'll keep her away from sin," she heard her parents whisper when they thought she wasn't there)

graduated high school at 15, youngest ever at her school

brigham young university wouldn't let her in until she was 16, so she took a gap year

she was told to stay on the property except for church, but as long as she did her chores and continued to learn household management, she was allowed to do whatever she wanted

she took this opportunity to study mechanical engineering, watching her father teach her brothers how to fix the mower then reading about engine torque

she knew that her ideas on how to make it go faster wouldn't be listened to, so she told her younger brother, isaiah, what to say and let him take the credit

he needed the praise, but it still hurt

but it was overshadowed by how good it felt to be right when her idea worked

at university, she was a bit too young to participate in the whole courtship thing that made up the backbone of social life there

she couldn't understand why her peers would choose to do all that for just some guy, but maybe she just wasn't old enough yet

graduated an accelerated course, a bs in applied physics with a minor in biochemistry, in 1954 at 19 years old

immediately applied for work in the military for the travel benefits

worked her way up very quickly since the need for chemical and nuclear weapons was increasing and they needed an innovative mind

at first it was weird, the way things were so different outside the church, but eventually she came around to the office culture of relaxed chatting over coffee while on break

and huh, come to think of it, the people she met were all different, and most of them seemed like pretty decent people to her

there wasn't an exact moment that cracked her belief, more just an increasing awareness of her own cognitive dissonance

and when she was invited to come back to provo for her endowment, she didn't respond

in late 1955, she got an offer from the a.s.s. to join their equipment development program for field agents where she would get full reign over what she did, and how could she say no to that?

and, ok, so there's this one guy, right? he's a field agent, his name is curt, and he's infuriating, but very conventionally attractive, and you know, theoretically, it wouldn't be awful to date him

is this what a crush is?

she thinks this is probably what a crush is

it takes a lot of work to feel this way, but she's pretty sure that she could be, no, is attracted to him

and she gets to be the one to supervise him on missions!!

but the issue is that curt has this friend and they're always together

if she wants to date this guy, she has to find some alone time, so she has to get rid of the friend

however... this guy, curt's friend, he's shockingly competent at his job, and he stops curt from dying constantly

plus, he's nice to barb, even if it's in that weird stiff british way all the mi6 guys seem to be

and one day, when she's briefing them on a tool neither of them have ever used before (of course they haven't, barb invented it herself), this friend, who's been staring behind her the entire time, says 'why don't you make the handle smaller? that way it's not as bulky and makes it easier to press the buttons on the right in a combat situation'

and oh.

the answer was that simple.

from then on, he stops being known as 'curt's friend (british)' and starts being 'owen (my best friend)'

they become each others' sounding boards, each of them dumping all their ideas out and talking through it with each other

barb knows how all the technical stuff for how her inventions work, but owen is detached enough to not overthink it and just state the obvious that she forgot

owen is continually formulating arguments and debates; why he should get a raise, why his partner (who barb still hasn't met yet, she hopes she'll get to meet her some day) should consider his point of view in conversation before going off on a tangent about something that wasn't even what he suggested, why whatever politics going on in england actually does affect his siblings, etc.

picking apart his arguments and playing the devil's advocate is one of barb's favourite things

curt is an unwilling participant in this little club of theirs, and often provides what she assumes he thinks is comedic relief

and for the first time, barb is content with how things are going for her

[worrywrite]

I've just finished Small Gods. And I gotta say. I'm divided on this one.

I have heard a lot of people recommend it, even as an entry into Discworld books. But I honestly would never tell someone interested in starting Discworld to start with Small Gods. It is not an easy to get into book. I almost felt like I was forcing my way through the book till the Ephebe section.

But I enjoyed it.

I think the problem I had with it is that it felt like it had a message and tried to tell a story a long with it. The book itself is hardly about the small gods, which I'm honestly fascinated to learn more about. What it is really about is metaphysics and ontology, but a very odd (and interesting) fictional ontological and metaphysical situation.

The question presented to the reader is not "does god exist" or "does this god, or any god exist". No, the book is pretty clear, as far as Discworld goes, gods are real. Lots of them. Far too many, really (though I have a soft spot for P'tang P'tang, guy didn't know what hit him). The questions the book presents are more about the relationship between gods and worshipers. It's almost an iteration of "which came first, the chicken or the egg" because the books big thesis is that gods need people more than people need gods.

But I also don't think it's quite so simple as that. Because a "god" by the books standards is a specific type of entity, but it also explains how people replace gods. The quisition is a form of god replacement; it does almost exactly what Om did early on and led followers through fear and power. People believed in the quisition the same way they believed in Om and so one was able to replace the other. The quisition was not a god, it was an organization of men; but it was able to take the place of one in the lives of devotees. The philosophers of Ephebe are another sort of religion. They aren't exactly atheists, because they know that would be foolish, but they worship ideas. They replaced religion with theories and innovations and questions.

The book almost says that gods need people and people need something to believe in. But not quite. Brutha falls short in that way (imo). He is a wonderful character and a good window for the narrative (and he's just a good dude and very endearing). But he doesn't really have a solution. He never addresses the problem. Not even Om, when he started a tavern brawl with the gods, fixes the problem. The conclusion of the book only feels like it managed to say "there is a problem" and that fixing it is an ever-present process. But nothing gets solved apart from the military conflicts. Omnianism is still... A mess. Religion and the gods and philosophy and the quisition are all still a mess. And Brutha's solution to it all is nearly "it needs to be better."

I recognize, of course, why it is this way. Attempting to answer the problem of what is there that people can believe in that still makes the world work is just... It's *the* question isn't it? Yeah, there's small and personal answers. But systematically answering that question basically creates a religion in the process.

---

Something I really appreciated, and I'm glad Pratchett wrote it this way (and frankly I wish there was more talk about it) was Vorbis' idea of truth and fundamental truth. Because that truly felt like the crux of the story.

I see it a lot in conversation in real religious circles. There is the reality of a situation (often something meaningless) and then there is the "fundamental" truth of it (usually an understanding of the situation with perceived values ascribed to it). It is like the difference between intrinsic and extrinsic value. There is a truth that is (reality) and a truth that matters (perception). The whole discussion in the book really boils down to being able to lie well, but it's like lying is a method of changing reality by altering perception.

The whole thing, and honestly a good chunk of the book, gave me a headache trying to work out. But it was a very interesting headache.

Lastly, I wanted to touch on Vorbis. Because he is almost a fantastic villain. But he falls short because he's a very chaotic neutral character. He's essentially a curious nihilist. He isn't, exactly, power hungry. The book explains that he does things, horrible things, just to see what happens next. But that, combined with his steel ball mind... Makes me wonder why he really did anything at all? I never felt like he was motivated, just that he was the force in motion that would go up against the protagonist. It was like he was a mechanism for disasters to strike, that his poking and prodding at reality had actually torn it asunder--but not in an interesting way.

All in all, it was a fairly difficult book to wrap my head around. Not in the same way as some others. Unlike other Discworld books that have left me feeling like I was missing something, this one felt like it was missing something. The humor and the wit were there, the message was there. But there was this void that I can't really describe except by using all these words.

[khalixvitae]

making clothes, especially alternative clothes, IS fun. the process of creation is the most gratifying part me thinks! however i refused to get stencils because i was like lmfao im already an artist ill just go big or go home and spent 3 hours handpainting the font designs alone onto it which really effed me in my a. getting into the act of DIY 😰 i inhaled the fabric paint so much i swear i had a communion with god and he was slapping me in the face with a wet halibut. i really do get why brands who handmake their unique items price it so high because it requires so much attention and time and id love to support them but i am like... shit fuck poor.... :-///

and if it's not the price of the item or shipping that's the problem then it's the fact that it's literally discontinued. nada. it's been out of stock for years so i can't buy it from them and anyone who sells their originals price it absurdly high. again i can see why (kinda) but i just can't afford it so i might as well learn a thing or two by making it myself! hopefully, and eventually, i will be able to design my own ambitious articles.

my vision for my too-ambitious ass is those madame chocolat shirts. they are so ostentatious and they'd probably give me hell trying to make them but if i CAN do it my ego will be so big plus ill have a cool shirt!!!!

as for rookvil x yuu poly, i imagine it'd be all the better if yuu, either, did not know who they were and thus did not allow the illusion of their fame place them on a pedestal from the get go, or they do know them, and they don't make a very big deal out of it. how fascinating! these two are models more iconic than shalom harlow, than naomi campbell, than kate moss, cindy crawford, christy turlington, claudia schiffer-- you get the gravity of it! yet their nonchalance serves to be even more invigorating than the bustle of the fashion industry.

and if yuu was ardently passionate about the craft and artistry of fashion! they'd be positively enthused by the admiration for the arts many big brands fail to have kept alive. you don't want your designs to be twisted by the sick hand of fast fashion? don't want large brands to piggie back ride off your geniusry? fine. be their one and only designer. design haute couture pieces vil peacocks out on the runway with cutting confidence and striking charisma like no one else can even muster. design avant garde pieces with creative vision rook's theatrical passion will surely complement and even amplify to stun the audience into a stupor at the ingenuity of. design alternative items that would fit them and only them and they will ensure you will have what you want. the claim to your art, the opportunity for greatness, the means to a comfortable life, endless time in their company. isn't it thrilling? to think these two practically have your name on them pretty much all the time, even if save for the days they model for different brands? the paparazzi goes wild upon seeing the two in your innovation.

and sure, their measurements have been taken countless times for past items, but each and every one has to be to a T! they certainly don't complain about their schedules or any of the sort when being roped into another hour long measurements session. yea, they're used to being measured upon modeling for certain items, but never for the sole intent that they are the only ones privy to such privilege-- never for such earnest determination to fulfill their desires and tastes and give them something to remember whilst also having your own artistic ambitions brought to life by them!

urgk. they make me insane in the membrane. i remember i once didn't sleep or eat for 2 days because my magnetic autistic aura compelled me to watch every gothic haute couture runway ever without any break. when you combine the idea of that and a favorite character i go absolutely livid. they haunt my every waking thought and action PLEASE help

Hello dear anon! I’ve had a negative social battery recently so I’ve been easing back into interacting with the world, but this is quite literally the BEST way to reintroduce myself to society. So many things to unpack here, all of them sublimely inspiring. On the topic of paint fumes and communing with the divine- I have also been there ! I can definitely understand your drive to hand paint rather than stencil though, I’m the same way. And finishing a difficult design is SUCH an ego boost I completely agree.

And as for the RookVil poly, I agree !!! A designer who doesn’t really make a big deal out of their statuses would be fascinating! Like sure Yuu realizes they’ve just found their most glorious muses yet, and are in awe of RookVil for their dedication and commitment to the craft, but they don’t alienate RookVil as if they’re untouchable superstars from another planet yk? There’s a kind of comfort the three would find in working together- no one else seems to understand their intense devotion to their respective arts. Yuu can keep measuring, keep realigning, keep tweaking designs until it’s absolutely perfect, and the two models won’t mind at all. For Rook, he finds a deep joy in watching Yuu work so passionately. There’s so much love for their craft in everything they do, and he feels honored to witness it. For Vil, he admires their work ethic and just how critical they can be. It’s not often that he finds someone as particular as he is about their respective art. He loves knowing that Yuu takes it all seriously, not just in the name of their reputation, but because Yuu knows what kind of quality aloty they’re capable of producing. But that also means that the two will urge Yuu to have breaks, to eat and sleep and be a human outside of their studio (and since the two models also need to fulfill those basic needs, why not as the three of them?). They take care of one another- at a certain point in the relationship, it clearly became more personal than work related. None of them really know when it happened- but once Yuu finds themself in the lavish living room of RookVil’s home, the three watching some movie Rook had insisted on playing but instead talking and laughing about everything except what was on the screen, they realize just how far from the professional path the arrangement has strayed. I am also. Fucking insane about this.

And also! I really really get being immersed in an interest that deeply anon😭😭😭 I will say that keeping snacks in my room helps when I fall down those rabbitholes. Sleeping is something I also have trouble with when I’m being plagued by demons (autism) but snacks in room can help work around the eating portion at least for me ! <3

[sauntervaguelydown]

Hey I've been following ur tumblr for like a few years less than a decade at this point- you were one of the first blogs i followed when i was like 13/14 and i followed you specifically cus of hannapoc. It was really seminal for me and i really loved it. If you feel so inclined, I'd love to hear your thoughts on the series on the whole. Like, what you think of it at this time. If you have anything you're especially proud of or anything you regret. Any themes in it or parts of it you would want to talk about or just like general vibes. No pressure of course! I would also like to say thank you for that series- i haven't read it in a while but it really compelled me and it remains in my mental landscape as a very treasured apocalypse story as well as my personal canon end for hinabn, as no others were forthcoming and anyways i couldn't rlly picture a more compelling one than what you ended up creating. (i was especially delighted by the fey and the official and unofficial interactions between human and supernatural elements. Stuff like the moonlight accords- i think that was what those treaties hanna was helping with were called right??- and that sort of thing were rlly fascinating to me. I don't think many writers have integrated fey/folkloric races in an apoclypse genre context, i found that rlly innovative and cool.) But yeah! Please write back or if you do not, please know that the stuff you wrote made an impact to me and i still think of it.

first of all this is so sweet thank you a bunch GOD it's been a decade

second of all I LOVE talking about the stuff I've written and I'm happy to do it any time

since there's a lot here and I've never been asked about the fey thing before, I'm going to start there!

So two of my particular special interests at the time I started writing this (12th grade) were a book series about an apocalyptic event wherein all electricity & combustion stops working at the same time, and fairies. Fairies are actually more of a lifelong special interest. I got interested in a kid, and as I got older I went deeper and deeper into the lore and the fiction and the various sorts of taxonomy. I was really influenced by Charles Delint’s The Blue Girl, in terms of spooky uncomfortable modern fairy imagery.  I really liked the idea of there being… like taxonomical classification scheme that encompassed all of the supernatural world, like in Artemis Fowl but more amorphous and less biologically mundane. You can see in “Up in Smoke” how it’s really a lot of things I was interested in at the time—Fight Club, governmental collapse, supernatural taxonomy, magic theory—that form the bones of the plot.

I liked the idea of humans being the “sun” people and supernatural beings being the “moon” people, and that was probably from a desire to do the “mud people” thing from Artemis Fowl but, again, more amorphous and poetic. I’m on of those people who likes to make Grand Unified Theory of Blank, so having all the monsters in HINABN canon and all the monster in folklore fit into a coherent shared schema REALLY appealed to me. Moonlight Races are creatures inherently made of and touched by magic. Sunlight races, humans and our pets and livestock, are not.

Early in the process I remember asking myself why, if fey and monsters are real, we don’t see them in the modern day. And some other fiction writers I had been reading at that time suggested that the actual pollution in the air was steel and fire and fairies Hate That so right now the whole world is kind of poisonous to them. I remember sitting at my desk at my first job and drawing charts on notepads describing which creatures went into which family, genus, species. I remember I found the shadow people by going down a Wikipedia rabbit hole looking for things that COULD be fey but aren’t necessarily considered that by people talking about them.

Before I wrote Hannapocalypse, I wrote a different 30 chapter apocalypse au of JTHM based very strictly on the book series I was obsessed with. I’m glad I got that out of my system, because it was objectively not very good, but it gave me practice with writing OCs and it gave me practice with writing fight/battle scenes, and it allowed me to scratch the need to do that EXACT apocalypse scenario. It’s all kind of fuzzy now, but I think it was some art I saw on Deviantart that got me thinking about doing an apocalypse for HINABN, and I waffled for a bit because I had already “done that”. I think I was at the perfect age to have just enough technical skill to pull it off, but not so much worldly experience to think “smoking cigarettes cures the plague” was a ridiculous idea not worth writing.  It was a very free time in my life.

When I look back on it, the aspect of it that always looms largest for me is actually Conrad’s aversion to sex. I think it’s because that’s still so uncomfortably personal. Conrad is a lot of me—when I went excavating in the canon to find his Characterization, I found a lot of myself there, and that’s what I drew out. His social anxiety, his ineptitude, his fear of sex, his attraction to the person who gives him attention even when it’s not healthy—even, probably, the bright hot moments of unleashed rage that burn away all the rest of the neuroses for one sublime moment. I mean he’s not me, first of all I’m not that witty or that snappish, but. You know. It’s still pretty personal.

I’m sort of ambivalent about it. I’m both proud of it and kind of regret it at the same time—if I think about regretting it, I end up thinking about how interesting it was instead. It’s really interesting because at first I wasn’t doing it on purpose; in my own mind I was just drawing out the will-they-won’t-they in a way that was fun to write, but the deeper we got—certainly by the time "A Christmas Story" came out, I had realized there was something going on inside ME that was making Conrad act the way he did. And that all got hashed out in the narrative as a combination of internalized homophobia and emotional wariness, so I do like what happened, but even now it still feels so personal I cringe back from it a little on automatic. If Vaysh hadn't been writing with me and able to reflect my instinctual work and resituate it in narrative, I have no idea how that would have turned out.

I’ll tell you what I really DO regret was trying to do the whole segregation + Zillah subplot at the age I was. It’s so weird that it’s THE foundational episode of the series, setting the pattern and tone for all installations written after it, and yet it’s like. Wow. Could not recommend this to anyone without a whole barrage of warnings. I was in 12th grade, I knew racism was a problem, I knew racism would be a problem IN THE SOUTH if a major disaster ever struck—and I wanted to do a cult story because religion fascinates me and there’s a cult storyline (ultimately very different) in that book series I liked—and I love girlboss villains and I wanted a Shadow King reveal at the climax—and it all came out as this wild messy strange thing that hasn’t aged well. I was REALLY excited out Zillah at the time, too! I thought she was so cool! Unfortunately I didn’t know enough not to invoke the much reviled “tragic mulato” trope at the time. On the other hand, I don’t really see how I could fix it now. It’s all tangled up to such a degree that if I tried to do surgery on it, the whole thing would just wither away.

I think more than anything I’m proud of the SIZE of the series. I don’t know where I got the JUICE from. How did I DO that. I mean, part of the trick is that I got to just write the parts I liked writing and then have Hanna handle all the parts I didn’t care about off screen lmao

Oh! I'm proud of John too! The moment when I realized he thinks of Worth as a father figure was the most satisfying experience of puzzle pieces all coming together. I love that he sucks, I love that he's funny, I love that he adds the feeling of FAMILY to the structure at the very end.

Uhhh I think that’s enough? I’ll answer more questions any time though I don’t mind

[potsmart]

A Fresh, Less Predictable List of What to Watch While Stoned

The secret is out. Everyone knows I’m a huge stoner, a wake and bake, never leaves home without his herb, you will know me by the sound of my cough type of everyday pothead. In the same way that every Christmas inevitably a family member will get me a tie dye shirt that says “Freshly Baked” or something similar, gormandizers of good ganja are suggested the same few things to watch online while high. It’s cool, everyone loves Chong man, but you can only watch Up In Smoke so many times. (Once.) Make sure you’ve gone to the HoJo and picked up a bunch of munchies because here is a list of suggestions of things to watch after you get unreasonably high.

Grab yourself some weed here and get ready to zone out…

FRINGE SPORTS:

Mountain of Hell

Total chaos on mountain bikes in the Alps is what this delivers. This race starts with over 1,000 riders at the top of a mountain in the alps and ends at the bottom. There are very few trails and riders start in the snow on what would be more appropriate to ski down. Get blazed and watch the whole race as this guy passes 1,000 people. This race is great to watch high because there are plenty of thrills mixed in with the incredible landscape of the Alps.

Bodysurfin’ The Movie

Unlike its sexy cousin surfing, body surfing has never been cool or marketable. Don’t tell that to David Schwepps, hit star of the incredible Bodysurfin’ The Movie. Get ready for weird skits, a completely made up lingo and bag of tricks with creamy slow-mo shots of Aussies bodysurfing. Sports like bodysurfing are almost like a dance since there are no real objectives other than staying in the wave and having a great time.

Rollerman

I’m not really sure if this guy is an innovator or just a weirdo, but he’s been using a suit full of rollerblade wheels to bomb down formidable hills and weave through traffic for what seems like two decades now. You got to give it to a guy who keeps on keeping on with a sport he invented

LIVE MUSIC:

Getting blazed can really help you centre your mind in a specific moment and enjoy art on a deeper level. Pull up your favourite artist live or acoustic and see what they sound like if you’ve never seen them in person. Even if you aren’t a musician there is so much wonderful information to be pulled from watching artists work. Here are some amazing artists I like to put on in the background as audio visual flavour for me session:

Dosh

Dosh is a true one man band, playing a looping everything, but not to be lumped in with the general cringy and gimmicky loop musicians that are a dime a dozen. Probably his biggest claim to fame is being part of the rhythm section for Andrew Bird. In fact much of what I enjoy about Andrew Bird is contributed by Dosh. He’s just a stunning drummer, keyboardist etc.

Against the Clock

This is a series where electronic artists are given 10 minutes to create a song. If you’re into electronic music this is a gem. If not, it may help guide you towards appreciation as it focuses on process, gear and creation in a very concrete way. Check out this episode here:

PROCESS VIDEOS:

Pencils etc.

A lot of us have a childlike fascination for how things are made. If you don’t have one, maybe it’s time to consider fostering one. A lot of people find videos on the process of making something to be relaxing.  Sure you could watch Rick n Morty while baked, but don’t you want to learn how a pencil is made?

Hot Sauce

Did you know Tabasco Sauce takes 3 years to ferment? Stop lying, of course you didn’t. Learn that and more in the classic “How It’s Made” episode on hot sauce. How It’s Made is a great show to watch while stoned in general. Mark Tewksbury is every Canadian’s wholesome dad. How could you not want to sit and listen to him explain how rainbow sprinkles or Twinkies are made.

There you have it, not a single Cheech n Chong movie, no That 70’s Show (classic), no Bob Marley (listen I love Bobby, but this is a “refreshing” list my fellow stereotype), but still generally interesting stuff to watch. Stay safe and order weed in. Both your mom and Mark Tewksbury are worried about you.

Buy some weed bro.

By Richard “Dick” Weed, Ganja Guru and Guest Contributor for Potsmart

[vistisenaarup26]

A Secret Weapon For Emmanuel De La Cruz Review

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[prettyangie2]

Discovering Entrepreneurship: My Learning Journey Introduction

Meet Angelika Jane Mejos: Exploring Education and Entrepreneurship

Hello, everyone! I'm Angelika Jane Mejos, and I'm thrilled to have you here on my blog. I'm currently a fourth-year student majoring in Secondary Education with a focus on English at Central Mindanao University. I've always been passionate about education, but something exciting has come my way recently. I'm now diving into the world of entrepreneurship through a course called "The Entrepreneur Mind." I'm eager to share my experiences and what I'm learning with all of you. Whether you're interested in what happens in classrooms or have a curiosity about entrepreneurship, I hope you'll enjoy reading my blog. Let's journey together as I balance my studies and explore the fascinating realms of education and entrepreneurship. We'll learn from some fantastic teachers and entrepreneurs along the way, discovering the incredible opportunities that both fields have to offer. Welcome to this adventure of growth and discovery!

Taking the course "The Entrepreneurial Mind" has been quite an adventure. The beginning part of this course has taught me a lot about entrepreneurship and its different aspects. In this blog, I want to share the main things I've learned so far.

1. Introduction to Entrepreneurship: What is Entrepreneurship?

Entrepreneurship isn't just about starting businesses; it's also a way of thinking and acting. It's about finding opportunities, taking smart risks, and being creative. Basically, it's about making a difference in the world by solving problems and adding value.

2. What Type of Entrepreneurship?

Entrepreneurship isn't one-size-fits-all. There are different types, and one that caught my attention is technopreneurship. This kind is all about using science and technology to create big, impactful things that can change the world.

3. Technopreneurship: Science, Scalability, Impact

Technopreneurs use science and technology to make things that can grow really big and help a lot of people. It's not just about making cool stuff; it's about solving big problems, sometimes even worldwide problems. It's exciting because it has the potential to change the way we live.

4. What is Disruption?

Disruption is a big word in entrepreneurship. It means shaking up traditional ways of doing things with new, game-changing ideas. It's like reimagining how things work and making them better. Disruption is what drives progress and innovation.

5. Misconceptions About Entrepreneurship

I used to think entrepreneurship was all about making quick money and being successful right away. But I've learned that it's a challenging journey filled with ups and downs. Sometimes, failure is part of the process, and you need to keep going.

6. The Reality About Entrepreneurship

Real entrepreneurship isn't a straight path. It's more like a rollercoaster ride. It's not just about making plans; it's about adapting and learning as you go. There are no fixed rules, and you have to figure things out as you move forward.

7. Why Do We Teach Entrepreneurship to Students?

Teaching entrepreneurship isn't just about making future business owners. It's about teaching us to think creatively, solve problems, and be resilient. These skills are super important in today's fast-changing world.

8. My Expectations for this Subject with Our Instructor, Sir Reymark Menguito.

I'm really looking forward to learning more about entrepreneurship with our instructor, Sir Reymark Menguito. I expect this course to be challenging and fun. I hope to gain practical skills and new ideas that will help me beyond the classroom. In conclusion, my journey into "The Entrepreneurial Mind" has been an exciting one. I've learned that entrepreneurship is more than just business; it's a way of making a positive impact on the world. This course has broadened my horizons and sparked a new interest in entrepreneurship and innovation.

[clockquiver6]

Strategies For Achievement Inside Your Next Web Marketing Marketing campaign

You would like to ensure that not just are you currently studying in regards to the latest and many exact online marketing suggestions but in addition, which you make certain every other info that you have gathered in the process. Make use of this post for some of the finest website marketing suggestions readily available. It's something obtaining individuals to visit your web site, but bear in mind that's only part of the procedure. You have to make your website appearance intriquing, notable and fascinating so visitors will feel at ease viewing the merchandise on display. Individuals desire to sense safe and sound whenever they buy their items online, along with a nicely organised internet site produces the right type of vibes. Realize that your internet site is not perfect. Numerous owners of internet sites feel their internet site is "first-rate", "remarkable", and "to never be out completed". Contemplating using this method won't lead to innovative suggestions and changes nevertheless, and can eventually resulted in a deficiency of continuing achievement. Every single web site available has space for enhancement.

A fantastic hint for Website marketing is always to make the website a lot more user friendly. By using a far more user friendly web site, users will feel convenient browsing and moving your web site. There are a variety of frauds on the web so you should make everything you can to help make your online visitors feel secure. You have to be making use of some kind of analytic tracking. If you are not sure exactly where your customers are coming from, you won't be targeting the correct audience later on advertising and marketing forces. Utilization of this sort of tracking provides you with essential geographic details and utilization habits when customers are on your internet site. You will have to entice individuals to earn money. You could do a break up examination, the place you try out various types of any advert on different teams, to determine what advertising is better. Make your mind up based on which edition led to getting one of the most members. To arrive at a lot more people more rapidly you could make a quick messenger profile with each one of the main suppliers, yahoo, aol, and msn. Then you can enter into chat spaces and merely junk e-mail the web link aimed at your website. Some curious individuals will then go check it out. What this does is permits you to get to perhaps 30 or more folks at the same time. A monthly newsletter is often an effective way of growing buyer commitment and revenue. Several organizations provide inexpensive, user friendly e-zine application that businesses can e mail over to their customer base. By sharing about new goods and services and keeping their brand in customers' heads, companies who mail out news letters can frequently see an increase in revenue. You should work hard to produce a clients list in your web site so that you can department out from internet and affiliate internet marketing into e-mail marketing. This a few-pronged strategy"internet affiliate, online and email marketing" is the best combination of marketing strategies to assist you to encounter long-term success, and endurance is what you ought to be seeking. Do not spend seo singapore near me on advertising and marketing. Look around to find the best offers, and don't waste materials money on an issue that isn't beneficial to your company. It is very important provide you with what you really are investing in. Obtaining responses on the commercials is the best way to appeal particularly on the market that you pick. Ensure that you're always seeking to search for outdoors thoughts on your marketing strategy. Not be shy and also request buyers what they think about your business and what you can do to boost it. Attempt upselling your customers. Once they reach an more aged site on your web site, give them hyperlinks to related more recent items. seo marketing near me may cause them to add more things to their orders placed, because they may look at it as being a convenient method to save by purchasing associated things at the same time. Make use of a system which will keep track of the most notable key phrases that your particular consumers are using, to find your product or service. After you have that information and facts, you can find the very best standing websites for all those keywords and phrases and when your small business is not one of these, then come up with a intend to alter that. Consist of audio and video customer feedback from previous customers on your own internet site. Website visitors are less likely to read, or perhaps believe, created recommendations, since they are really easy to fake. Video clip and audio testimonials, however, are considered by possible buyers as increasing numbers of authentic and will help to enhance your sales. Bear in mind as an internet marketer that your enterprise objectives are never completely met. The long term objective of the company, endurance, is rarely-ending. The rest that you do or complete is all so your enterprise continues to be energetic, effective, and proficiently operates on its own. Pondering you might have "received", will usually cause failing.

Take into account setting up a bonus position system that consumers obtain depending on the amount of money they may have allocated to your site. Buyers can accrue these factors after a while and eventually buy and sell them set for a winning prize or low cost. This can be a wonderful way to continue to keep replicate customers arriving repeatedly. When working on your online marketing supplies, take advantage of the head line formatting. Head lines suggest key details, essential proclamations, and alluring prospective customers that could grab the attention and bring your reader straight into discover your offerings. Your head line may incorporate factual information like data or dollar quantities, or create inquiries, deals, or promotions. Don't neglect to adopt your web marketing traditional. That may seem to be peculiar, but provided you can get curious people to appear online and then see your internet site, you are likely to start out with a much stronger interconnection than you have with somebody who simply clicked a link on one more site. Now that you are aware of some beneficial Web marketing suggestions, you could start to add a number of the tips and methods you have acquired in this article. You should make sure you handle things slowly and gradually and gradually. There aren't lots of techniques available that can make targeted traffic instantaneously. Provided that you're utilizing precise information, you need to have no problems developing a audio approach.

[yesokayiknow]

Here is my take that might be considered hot but shouldn't be, you dont need to be a lighting expert to love and understand the lighting behind a piece of work, in fact, that's kinda the point of it! It exists to tell the story and show the feelings or motivations of characters, they use our own emotions to guide us through the story. Sure there is a technical aspect of it and as a tech nerd i think the main thing that excites me about looking into the tech side is seeing how i might recreate something like that or change it to tell my story. The majority of lighting is underrated. Anyways, this is enough pretentious film school nerd talk for one day, but your opinions and thoughts on the story matter and have value, dont let anyone tell you otherwise

!!!! thank you. i always worry when i praise things that aren't my field that i'm actually like praising something that's actually awful and i'm not skilled enough to notice 😔 sometimes things just like? grab you though? and god like sure editing is probably the best measure of whether a film is good or not but if you've got yourself good cinematography & lighting & music??? chef's kiss, even IF the film is a narrative nightmare

also as someone who unfortunately watches a lot of superhero media, i'm now very much more appreciative of lighting just like not even the fancy stuff just every time i watch something where they have more than one tiny light i'm like thank god. and also whatever the role is for colour grading please you can have more than like 10 muted shades in a film i promise

[mochegato]

Even the Losers

Chapter 2

Chapter 1

Bruce watched Lucius, or more specifically his hands, with a well concealed hostility.  If you didn’t truly know Bruce or weren’t well versed at reading suppressed emotions, you could believe it was just another artificially polite expression.  But Lucius had known Bruce since he was a child and Marinette hadn’t spent years fighting an emotional terrorist for nothing.  “I haven’t seen you all night and now I find you coopting this beautiful young lady’s time,” Bruce observed, his mouth tight.

Marinette eyed him apprehensively, subconsciously taking a half step back.  Her whole body stiffening.  Lucius took note of the change and moved slightly between the two of them and laughed politely.  He wasn’t sure what caused the change in demeanor but he still wanted to try to cultivate a business relationship with the young lady.  When they got the fabrics working, they would need a designer and she was not only clearly the perfect candidate for the position, they had already been considering her before everything she’d said during their dance.  

“Sorry, Mr. Wayne.  I assure you I was not avoiding you in favor of a prettier face,” he chuckled.  “Although I’ve been informed elusiveness seems to be a quality I exude unintentionally.” He winked at Marinette who smiled weakly at the attempt.

Bruce chuckled with him, tight and short exhales, his eyes never softening.  “I wouldn’t blame you at all.  She certainly is lovely.”

Marinette’s chest hollowed out, all the breath in her evaporating out of her chest as though it had never been there.  “Kind of you to say,” she rasped out just barely looking up to meet his eyes.

“Just saying the truth,” he assured her with more sincerity.  His eyes finally managed to soften as he looked at her, but immediately hardened again when he returned his gaze to Lucius.  “I’m sorry if Lucius has been keeping you captive.  I know he likes to talk and it can be hard to get him to stop, especially when he’s taken a particular interest in something… or someone.”  His eyes sharpened on Lucius as he spoke.  Lucius only raised his eyebrow in response, leaning back slightly as if to see Bruce a bit better.

Marinette immediately straightened back up, her eyes hardening.  All evidence of uncertainty and unease shattering as she did.  She had been the one to approach M. Fox.  She had been the one to coopt his time.  She had been the one manipulating the situation.  And now M. Wayne was going to try to twist this on M. Fox, who had been nothing but gracious and kind.  “I was just discussing innovation and the application process with M. Fox,” Marinette responded coldly before Lucius could.  “He was polite enough to entertain my questions.  He has been quite polite and charming and professional.”

“Were you thinking of working for WE?” Bruce asks perking up slightly.  

“You couldn’t pay me enough,” Marinette scoffed out before she could stop herself.  She immediately mentally face palmed.  This wasn’t the time for this.  Now was about Max, not her.  The mission had been successful she wasn’t going to blow it now by letting M. Fox see her overreactions.  

She let out a breath and looked back up with an overly wide smile.  “As I mentioned to M. Fox, I’m not really interested in technology.  I couldn’t imagine anything more boring than staring at numbers and code all day long,” she laughed in the way she’d seen Adrien laugh at events like this, an empty, meaningless laugh meant to indicate a lack of interest in the topic rather than actual entertainment, leaning toward Lucius as she said it, hoping to pull him into the conversation and rescue her from.

“It’s not my favorite part of the day either,” Lucius smiled graciously.  “I imagine you would still be good at it,” he assured her, “but I can’t say I blame you. I would likely react the same if faced with bolts of fabric and thread.”

Marinette smiled politely, grateful to him for the reprieve.  “Well that sounds interesting,” Bruce interjected.  “Perhaps we can discuss what would interest you during a dance.” He motioned toward the dancefloor and held his hand out toward her.

Marinette glanced down at the hand, a weight settling in the pit of her stomach.  If she gave in he’d have her for the duration of the song.  One-on-one.  No escape without creating a scene.  Trapped by the same societal conventions she’d used against M. Fox.  “Surely you must have more important guests to attend to,” she offered instead.

“I do not,” he assured her, sincerity radiating from his eyes.

Marinette opened her mouth to say yes, resigning herself to her fate when she felt a hand on her hip.  “There you are M’lady.  I lost you in the sea of people for a moment.”  Adrien prompted her to turn slightly so he could look her in the eyes. “You okay?”

Her shoulders, she hadn’t even realized had worked their way up to almost touching her jaw, instantly relaxed.  She gave him a relieved smile and squeezed his hand.  “I’m good, Kitty.  Thank you.”

“Is this your date?” Bruce inserted, eyeing him coldly, but held his hand out to him.  “Bruce Wayne.”

Adrien gave him his practiced, social smile, perfect for galas with strangers and potentially hostile associates.  “Nice to meet you, sir.  This is a very nice gathering.  Very kind of you to do this for the orphans,” his tone was bordering on openly hostile but keeping to the socially acceptable side of the border. Marinette choked at the statement. She hadn’t really thought about the intent of the gala since she’d made the plan.  When she’d made it, the purpose hadn’t had any bearing.  But now…

“Thank you.  It is an important cause to my family and myself.”  He missed the way Adrien squeezed Marinette tighter at his words. “You mentioned talking to Mr. Fox about innovation at Wayne Enterprises.  Perhaps you would like a tour of the building.  I can arrange one personally for you.”

Adrien pulled his lips into a tight, sickeningly artificial smile.  “How very generous of you.  Unfortunately, we won’t be in town that long.  We are scheduled to leave town Tuesday.”

Bruce looked between the two, forcing his body to not stiffen at Adrien responding for Marinette.  “Tell me about yourself, son,” Bruce smiled stiffly, noting that he had artfully left out his name, not that Bruce didn’t know it already, although the physical proximity to Marinette was unexpected.

It took almost all of Marinette’s experience as Ladybug to keep a poker face instead of letting her jaw drop in offense.  “Why don’t you let these young people dance, Bruce,” Lucius interrupted, detecting Marinette’s increased discomfort.  “After all, it’s cruel to make the young have to endure making conversation with the old guard like us.”  He turned to Marinette and Adrien with a kind smile.  “Make sure you don’t miss your opportunity to dance tonight.”

Marinette smiled at him gratefully.  “Not at all, M. Fox.  I found our conversation very fascinating.  Thank you very much for sharing your time with me.  It was much appreciated.  But I will take you up on your advice.”  She turned to Adrien and motioned to the dancefloor.  “Shall we?”

“Always,” Adrien smiled.  “Gentlemen.”  He nodded to them and guided Marinette across the dancefloor, taking great care to escort her as far from them as he possibly could.  He glanced around to make sure the men couldn’t see them and pulled Marinette into a comforting, all-encompassing hug.  “How are you really?”

Marinette held him tightly and buried her head in his chest.  “I’ll be okay.  I just… Thank you for the save.”  She laid her head on his chest as they swayed to the music.  Her breath slowly shifted from shaky to more steady.  She lost track of the number of songs that passed while she found her voice again.  When she could breathe normally again, she stood straight and smiled at Adrien.  “It worked.”

“It worked?” Adrien asked excitedly.

Marinette nodded and had to stop herself from doing an entirely inappropriate victory dance.  “He wants to meet Max on Monday.  Well, me too,” she cringed slightly, not looking forward to being involved beyond what she had done already.  “But! But, he was floored by Max’s invention. Like completely floored!  And knows about Rabler now.  He did not look happy at all about the news.”  Her grin widened as she remembered the encounter.  “I think Max is really going to be taken care of.  It went so well!” she squealed.

Adrien grinned back and hugged her.  “We have to let Max know.”

Marinette nodded.  “He’ll call us when he’s done.  We just need to stay up until then.”

Adrien nodded.  “Coffee it is then.  Do you want to leave now or look around?”  Marinette looked around quickly.  By the time she looked back at Adrien, her eyes had lost their light. She looked exhausted suddenly, drained by the experience.  Adrien gave her an understanding smile and squeeze.  The mission was over.  She didn’t need to be in mission mode anymore, or at least not high alert.  She just had the meeting on Monday and she was done. Now she could stop blocking any potentially interfering emotions and actually let herself feel again.  “Let’s get out of here and find a coffee shop then. We can take it back to the hotel and watch bad movies until Max calls.”

Marinette gave him a weak smile.  “Maybe popcorn and candy and drinks instead,” she offered. She rested her head on his shoulder. “Sooooo many drinks and ice cream.”

Adrien laughed and slung his arm over her shoulder to help guide her and comfort her at the same time.  They wound through the crowd making their way to the exit and freedom, where Marinette could finally breathe freely.  They had almost made it to the doors when they heard someone call Adrien’s name.  Adrien looked around and cursed under his breath.  “Hey again.”

“Leaving so soon?” Tim asked.  He looked between the two with a concerned expression.  It was awfully early in the night to leave already.

“Yeah, I think so.  It’s a nice event but I think we’re ready to go home, take off the stuffy clothes, and drink,” he gave him a charming, conspiratorial smile. Nobody their age wanted to be here and they all knew it.

“Oh that sounds like a brilliant plan,” the blonde woman next to Tim grinned.  “I wish we could do that.  But we have to at least wait until the announcement.  And we can’t drink.  But it would help handle events like this.”  She gave them a wide smile and held out her hand.  “I’m Stephanie.  Nice to meet you.”

Adrien smiled politely back.  “Adrien.  Hi.”

Marinette smiled civilly.  “Marinette.  Nice to meet you.”

Stephanie’s smile widened.  “Oh Timmy, make sure to keep this one away from Bruce.  Black hair, blue eyes, looks beautiful but haunted. He’ll adopt her in an instant.”

Tim laughed and rolled his eyes, drawing Stephanie’s attention to him, both of them missing the way Marinette and Adrien balked and Marinette’s entire body went rigid again.  “Bruce’s breaking that habit with today’s announcement.”

Adrien paled slightly.  This could go nowhere good, but it was like watching an akuma hit someone when you’re too far away to help.  It was going to happen no matter what.  The damage would be inestimable and all he could do was watch as it got worse and worse.  “Oh?”

“Yeah, our new brother… or rather their new brother, I’m not officially adopted, just unofficially the favorite child,” Steph winked at them.  Tim huffed playfully but didn’t contradict her.  It was easier to just let it go.  “Anyway, the new Wayne doesn’t have blue eyes. Does have black hair, is beautiful and looks haunted, so maybe it’s just the blue eyes that don’t matter so much anymore.”

“N…new brother?” Adrien stuttered, struggling to keep his voice even and polite.  The normal reaction to such news would be interest and happiness.  Well, they certainly had his interest.  The happiness part though…  He pulled Marinette tighter as he sent her a furtive look.  She was doing an admirable job of masking her response but he knew her. He knew the signs.  He knew her lips were a bit tighter than usual.  He knew her jaw was clenched harder than was normal.  He knew her breathing was harder than average.  He knew he shouldn’t be able to feel her pulse from here.

“Yeah!” Stephanie enthused.  “Duke.”

“We were supposed to wait for the announcement,” Tim chastised with no real heat behind his words.  “But yes.  That’s what this gala is really for.  To officially announce the adoption of Duke Thomas.  So, yet another ‘poor orphan’ joins the rest of us,” he joked.  “I swear Bruce just can’t help himself.  He sees a kid and instantly feels the need to protect and help.”

“So thoughtful,” Marinette rasped out, pretending like her entire chest wasn’t breaking apart and disintegrating in front of them.  “You must all be so excited.”

Tim looked at her for a moment but before he could analyze her tone or body language, they heard someone tapping on a microphone.  “That’s our cue,” Stephanie squealed.  “Looks like you might make it for the announcement after all.  It was nice to meet you if I don’t see you after.”  Tim and Stephanie waved before making their way to the stage.

Once the two were gone, Marinette’s eyes bulged as Tim’s words reverberated in her head.  This whole thing was to introduce a new child, another new child he took in, another addition to his family, another child he wanted and brought into his life instead of throwing them out.  Her eyes darted among the family members as they all made their way up onto the stage.  All standing behind the new member, smiling at him, hugging him, eyes shining in acceptance for him.  One big happy family, not wanting for anything… or anyone.

Marinette didn’t realize she had stopped breathing until her body forced a deep gasping breath, knocking her out of her stupor. She tore her eyes away so violently, she stumbled back, or maybe it was just that her resilience had disappeared with the words.  They should not be here.  They… she should never have come.  This was a stupid, terrible plan.  She had no right to intrude.  She had no right to be here… for this.

Her heart raced out of control.  Her whole body started shaking.  She couldn’t breathe.  Why couldn’t she breathe now?  But suddenly there wasn’t enough air in the room.  Why wasn’t there air?  There had been air before, hadn’t there been?  She remembers being able to breathe earlier.  She thinks.  Maybe she made that up.  Maybe she hadn’t been able to breathe since she stepped in the room.

She stumbled again and reached out for support, never doubting it would be there for her.  Adrien responded instantly, bringing her into his chest and quickly guiding her out of the gala.  He whispered comforting and reassuring words as they moved, throwing empty smiles at anyone who bothered looking their way, as though helping his drunk date home, nothing scandalous or even unusual, nothing to look twice at.

They missed the eyes searching the crowd for them and the quickly covered up frown at finding them missing.

Chapter 3

Tags:

@maribat-bdbwm @jayjayspixiepop @redscarlet95 @alice-hazelwood @deathssilentapproach-blog @unoriginalmess @alyssadeliv @emotionalsupportginger 

[the-seas-song]

Richard Armitage and Astrology

Hi! I find astrology fascinating, and am an armchair expert on it myself, so I found Richard's comments in his recent Total Film Magazine interview very interesting. This is what he said:

I’ve been incredibly lucky. I’ve dabbled with having my celestial chart looked at every couple of years, just for a little tune-up. Every time, the guy sighs, and goes, “What can I say? You’ve just got a sprinkle of luck.” And I say, “That’s good, because I don’t have the talent, so I really need the luck!”

[cut]

There is a naughty, dark side to me. I am quite strongly affected by the moon. So if there’s a full moon I’ll go a bit crazy. (source)

This isn't the first time Richard's mentioned astrology – he's mentioned being a Leo, reading his daily horoscope, and finding out he was born in the Chinese Year of the Pig; but these were all informal twitter comments. He has also mentioned the effect the moon has on him before, in February 2020:

“Everyone has cycles of positive mental and emotional feelings and negative mental and emotional feelings and I know that I am profoundly affected on a monthly cycle. I always look at the calendar when I'm feeling particularly low and check the lunar cycle to see if it's a full or new moon.” (source)

However, what prompted me to write this is that Richard's personal put-downs were even more direct here than usual; and the connection that has to his natal, or birth, chart.

A little disclaimer: Personally, I think general horoscopes (like the ones you find in magazines) do far more harm than good. They are based solely on the twelve sun signs, and your sun sign is just one puzzle piece out of 25+ pieces that make up your natal chart. This is why many people don't relate to their horoscope or it's personality description.

Your natal chart, however, is a whole different animal. It's an intricate puzzle created by the exact date, time, and location you were born; which is why most people find their natal charts to be scarily accurate.

Back during the Hobbit days, a fan blog reported that Richard told a NZ fan that his birth time was just after 4 a.m. I used 4:05 for this post, and being off by a few minutes doesn't really make a difference.

Richard and self-esteem

I really feel for and relate to Richard's self-esteem struggles, because our charts mirror each other. We are both Leo suns; but I have my moon in Aries with my MC and Chiron conjunct each other in Virgo and sextile my North Node; while Richard has his moon in Virgo with his MC and Chiron conjunct each other in Aries and sextile his North Node.

What on earth does that mean?

Each planet represents a different part of you. The sun represents your ego/conscious self; the moon your emotions, mercury your mind/intellect, venus love and beauty/aesthetics, mars passion and drive, etc.

On top of the twelve planets, there are specific points and asteroids that are also important. Your MC, or Midheaven, represents your career and public persona. Your North Node describes your inner journey and life purpose. The asteroid Chiron describes your major soul wound, that you will be forced to deal with throughout your life.

A conjunction and a sextile are two of several different kinds of aspects. The different kinds of aspects are the different ways your respective puzzle pieces can interact with each other. Some are 'easy/positive' and some 'difficult/negative'. A sextile is considered easy/positive. A conjunction means two things are next to each other and overlap with one another, and is usually considered positive.

Leo and Aries are both fire signs. Fire signs are generally playful, warm, passionate, confident, and optimistic. Virgo is an earth sign. Earth signs are generally practical, grounded, sensual, and logical.

Richard's personality is dominated by an almost equal amount of Leo and Virgo influence, with both his sun (core self) and venus (love and beauty) in Leo and his moon (emotions) and mercury (mind) in Virgo.

Aries and Virgo are said to be the most difficult Chiron signs, because they are the wounds tied directly to your self-worth (Aries is the wound of Self and Virgo is the wound of Perfection). With Aries Chiron you feel a core sense of worthlessness, like you're missing a fundamental piece of your core self. This deeply felt lack of self-worth leads people to be people pleasers and have issues with confrontation and conflict.

Aries rules the planet mars. It is the warrior planet of passion, drive, and combat. A conventional Aries is confident, outgoing, impulsive, and strong willed. Aries and mars are definitely the rowdiest sign and planet in the zodiac. However, with Chiron here the traits are inverted, and so someone like Richard is much more likely to be scared of his inner passion, confidence, and willpower – depending, of course, on what the rest of his chart is like.

That leads us to Virgo. Chiron Virgo feels impure, like there is something fundamentally wrong with them. This kind of low self-esteem makes you feel like you have to constantly try to 'fix' yourself so people will love and accept you. It's an OCD type of perfectionism that only ends in failure and heartbreak.

A good example of how this works is when I talked to my therapist recently. I hadn't quite succeeded in meeting my goals, and so my automatic response was to condemn myself for failing. My therapists immediate response was to congratulate me on how much progress I had made.

Ironically, unlike with Aries, this isn't an inversion of the conventional Virgo. Conventional Virgo is meticulous, detail-oriented, focused, patient, efficient, practical, perfectionistic, systematic, and pessimistic with high expectations. If Aries is the official warrior of the zodiac, Virgo is the official nit-picker.

This means that Richard's subconscious intellectually (mercury) and emotionally (moon) expects and demands perfection, whilst simultaneously feeling fundamentally worthless. In short: ouch.

Interestingly, a significant number of celebrities have their Chiron conjunct their MC. Personally, I think Richard hit the nail on the head as to why in his essay on the Human Condition for Cybersmile:

The answer in my humble opinion, (and believe me it is humble, to a point of taking 43 years to be shared) is actually something which applies to my work as an actor. It’s why sometimes actors are called in to work with therapists, in large corporations, in schools. It’s why drama therapy is fantastic to understand what we do, how we do it and what the outcome might be, and in an improvisation where we aren’t playing ourselves sometimes we explore avenues that are too frightening or unacceptable in our own lives.

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So going back to my very first point, the “social media society” in which we’d all like to feel safe, supported, excited, creative, spontaneous, innovative, courageous, is really in our own hands. And back to acting, it’s taken me a long time to shake off the effects of bullying in school. That people were always laughing behind my back. I was always looking out of the corner of my eye. I now have incredible peripheral vision which is so useful, (as is Kinesthetic sense…Google it) but try being a brave, experimental, uninhibited actor with all of those hang ups. Wasn’t happening.

So here is the thing, and it’s key to my work and I think ours as a community. When we speak or write, we ultimately desire to ‘affect’. If we aren’t watching the destination of that affect, then how do we know our words have landed and the ‘effect’ they have caused?

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If I have a strong opinion about something which I want to express I really task myself with backing it up with the ‘why do I feel that?’

Again it’s part of my work building a believable character, and actually part of building a believable ‘me’ outside of my work. Just.. “because that’s what I feel” is a bit of a cop out.

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As for Bullying, it’s like the moment the pot boils over, or it’s the poisoned stream that can’t be cleansed, so why bother. Well I think that’s what art is for. It’s can support the best and the worst of ourselves. We can ‘attack’ a canvas with black angry paint, we can ‘savage’ a piano keyboard, we can dance until we drop, we can read about a Puritan society who executed elders, we can explore the psychology of a serial killer, and when we can’t do this ourselves we can experience it, and witness it through others.

It’s more than being nice. Edward Munch’s “The Scream” is far from nice. Francisco Goya’s “Saturn” is horrific, Metallica, Die Antwoort etc etc. But then there is Monet, Faure, Renée Fleming, Peter Jackson, Ariana Grande (ok it’s getting a bit eclectic I admit) but when we look, listen and empathize, we tune in to the Human Condition.

We are all part of The Human Condition, whether we like it or not. Social Media. Expression. The Human Condition.

Us human beings are wired for emotion and connection. For actors, their career gives them a way to safely process and explore their personal wounds through the characters they play. For Richard in particular, his mars is conjunct his North Node. So, his mars and North Node are sextile his Chiron and MC.

Remember, Aries (the sign of Richard's Chiron and MC) is ruled by mars. Mars is the warrior planet, like Aries is the warrior sign. This means that Richard's spiritual journey/life's purpose (North Node) deals directly with healing his soul wound so he can accept and embrace his inner confidence and willpower. This explains why he ends up playing a lot of ultra-masculine characters – mars/Aries are the most macho of them all.

This isn't to say I think Richard should change who he is! I wouldn't be interested in him if he was ultra-masculine or macho. However, for his own sake, I would be overjoyed to see him gain more self-esteem and inner confidence.

Extrapolating from my own personal experiences, the constant criticism and judgement I received during my adolescence from my peers and various authority figures (like family members and teachers) for being unconventional and 'over the top' caused me to turn on myself and repress my passion and will-power for several years. I think it's highly likely that Richard experienced this too.

Here are some quotes from Richard that illustrate everything I've been talking about (emphasis is mine):

Armitage is still notably handsome, but, within minutes of meeting him, it’s apparent how incongruous it is that this bookish, sensitive, self-described ‘melancholic, philosophically-minded softie’ and ardent fan of The Great British Bake Off was cast as beefcake killer totty for a considerable part of his career. ‘It’s ridiculous. It’s the complete opposite to who I am. I’m such a pacifist,’ he laughs. ‘But then, part of me always felt: “Well, isn’t that why we’re actors?”

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'I think the turning point was losing my mum,” he says. “Up until that point, I felt like I mustn’t put a foot wrong, that if I said the wrong thing or revealed too much about my personal life, it could all come crashing down, and it would come down on my parents, and they wouldn’t be proud of me anymore.” He shrugs. “Now that I’m past that I’m actually much more carefree about the choices I make.” (source)

Richard Armitage puts his head in his hands and emits a noise that's somewhere between a sigh, a laugh and a groan. “Oh no! Why would you want to pin this up?” he says with a horrified whisper.

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Never has a man seemed more ill at ease with the heartthrob label. He squirms with embarrassment in his chair every time the subject comes up. He is grateful for the loyalty of his fans, he says, but worries that “there is this thing of, 'Is he just totty?' Because the industry will sometimes write you off as a serious actor if they think that. I have always been conscious of that and fought against it, because I don't really see myself like that at all.”

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This brings us back to Astrov, who looks so relentless towards the future that he can't see the truth in front of his eyes. “It's interesting that he's an outsider in the play. I've often felt like that myself in life. I'm quite a solitary person. I enjoy my time with me, and sometimes it's not necessarily healthy, because I can talk myself into quite a dark place.

I'm an optimist, but at the same time, there's a discipline in me that will attack me for not working hard enough, not achieving enough, not being good enough. You always think, 'I'll grow out of that. With success, those voices will disappear.' But they don't, they get louder. I suppose I'm learning a bit about myself through Astrov.” (source)

The answer in my humble opinion, (and believe me it is humble, to a point of taking 43 years to be shared) is actually something which applies to my work as an actor. … And back to acting, it’s taken me a long time to shake off the effects of bullying in school. That people were always laughing behind my back. I was always looking out of the corner of my eye. I now have incredible peripheral vision which is so useful, (as is Kinesthetic sense…Google it) but try being a brave, experimental, uninhibited actor with all of those hang ups. Wasn’t happening. (Human Condition essay)

So I kind of travelled on that line for a while, and I was bullied for it as well. The problem with me is that as soon as you try to push me down or say “you can’t do this” and “I don’t think you should do that”, I immediately push back. So I did – I’d decided really young that I was going to try to make a career out of it.

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Actually, there was something I wanted to add to what Shaun said, about inclusivity, is that um, no matter how – how much confidence you have or how, in my case, lack. Y’know, I always felt like a misfit, or an oddball, or that I didn’t belong. But I always – I always told myself that ‘you exist in the world, so therefore there’s a place for you in this industry’. I think anybody who feels like, “I can’t become an actor because…” – you exist. And, y’know, the job of filmmakers is to write about our life and society, and if you are a part of that, then there’s a place for you in the industry. (source)

I'm a bit of a brooder. I don't like confrontation, so I think I suppress things. When my temper does come out, it goes all the way – the kind of temper you can't apologize for. Yep, the chair getting thrown out of the window. Those emotions are scary, but hey, they come in useful when you're acting. (source)

Armitage is a noticeably calm presence but he talks with passion.

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In the past, he has described himself as a shy person. “Not any more,” he says forcefully. “I mean… if I’m very, very honest, I’m a big guy, I think I’m at times quite a frightening person.”

In what way?

“I think I’m quite uncompromising. I can’t bear bulls---. And in a way the shyness is me protecting other people from that. I can feel that there’s an intimidation that can happen if I own my full height, and speak at my full volume. So I’ve learned over the years to just tone it all down a bit.” (source)

I've become one of those actors who find it difficult to say no when things are offered. I think if I had come out of drama school and been an instant Hollywood superstar I would be taking long, leisurely holidays. But I always feel somehow it's going to be taken away from me so I work when I can. When you struggled with work as I did when I left drama school you make hay when the sun shines. There was a time when I thought, and my agent thought, it wasn't going to happen for me. We both sat down and I actually said I don't know if I can stay in this state. The interesting roles have only come since I got into my 30s. But I didn't know that was going to happen. I'm a bit of an all or nothing kind of guy. To be honest, I had no blind faith in myself. I don't think I could have stayed around as a jobbing actor. I would probably have quit. Who knows? I think I would have found that too frustrating. But at the moment when I thought I was going to quit, something happened and it all changed again. (source)

[talking about being cast in the Hobbit]

There was a little bit of guidance as to what they were looking for. I felt that I was too young for the character, too tall for that character, so I thought, you know, ‘I’ll just look at the scene they’ve written’. And then I realised the essence of the character that they were aiming for. So I went to meet Peter and Phillipa and we read some of the scenes. I think we spent an hour-and-a-half talking about the character and what their vision was, and I sort of explained who I thought he was, and that was it.

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Yeah, my first instinct, whenever that kind of thing happens, is to say, 'Well what's wrong with the part? Why did nobody else want it'? Which is kind of the story of my life really. When I get offered something, I'm like, 'Well there must be something wrong with it if they're offering it to me!'

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But you know, the thing is, you talk about all of this: ‘How did you get the role? And how did it feel when you got the role?’ And once all that’s died down you start to think, ‘I’ve actually got to go and play this now’. They’ve trusted me. Everyone’s happy, everyone’s celebrated, the phones have gone down and the deal’s been done. Now it’s over to me to make the role work. And that’s the scariest moment, because you do have that elation and then the work begins and you think, ‘How the hell am I going to do this?’ (source)

How was it for you taking on this beloved role, this character that has such a huge responsibilty on his back? Could you relate in some ways?

Richard Armitage: Yeah. There is always building within him this paranoia that he’s not a good enough leader, and that weighs him down. I have experienced that same feeling as an actor in this role. And I was aware of taking on the responsibility of that character, so there was something I could latch onto there, as one of the people who loved ‘The Hobbit’ book and had envisioned that character. It took me a while to be convinced that I could do it, it wasn’t until I saw some sketches, this one particular pencil sketch….there was something about this characters eyes and the way that his hands are crossed, I thought, “I think I can do this, I can pull this off.” (source)

Q: I wanted to ask you about what your Arkenstone is. For you personally.

A: Me personally?

Q: And I meant for this to be materialistic. What's the thing that you covet so much that it makes you mad that you don't have it?

A: Well, it's actually not material. It's not material, and it's – (laughs) You want a comedy answer, don't you? But it's respect. It's the thing that always eludes you, you know. You have to fight for it and when you get it, your arkenstone, the thing that crowns you, is respect.

Q: And also a sweater.

A: And a sweater. I do have this little natty number.

Q: It's a good one man.

A: Tom Ford made this personally. But hey, he can have it back. I don't covet wealth and material. (source)

Q6: You’ve done a variety of different roles, I wonder what influences you to pursue those roles?

R: More often than not, you go where you’re wanted. So getting hired is still kind of a revelation to me, a shock and a surprise. Sometimes you have very flat periods, where I don’t really care what comes next, I just want to work on something. I feel like I’ve got a little cloud of luck over my head so the right thing always seems to come along. But again, I’m easily excited about literature and stories, so I’ve always said I don’t really pursue glory, I’d happily do acting for two people in my living room if it was a role that I really enjoyed with a story I’d really like to tell. So it’s chance, I would say.

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Q8: Once in an interview about Thorin, you were asked what your arkenstone was and your answer was respect. I like this answer a lot. So I was wondering what’s your red dragon? As you said yesterday he’s a character who sheds his skin, improves, and becomes something. I was wondering if there was something you’d like to improve, become?

R: I guess the antithesis of that is disrespect. Do you mean in myself?

Q8: Yes.

R: Yeah I try not to be too disrespectful. I guess I value the truth. I think we’re living at a time at the moment where the truth is warped and there’s a word that’s been in my head for a long time, and particularly recently it’s come to the surface. When I was studying Macbeth, at the RSC, I read a long thesis about the gunpowder plot, which was one of the things they thought that Shakespeare (or whoever Shakespeare was) was stimulated by to write Macbeth. And the word equivocation was used in this thesis, it was actually about equivocation and what equivocation is. And if you look it up in the dictionary, at the moment most politicians are equivocating. When you don’t answer a question, or you bend the truth to make it seem like you are answering the question, and in fact you’re telling a lie. So I would say my red dragon would be equivocation.

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Then there was the physical form that I was studying and observing, but also, I do sometimes enjoy locking myself away in a room and reading a book or just doing something alone, and you sometimes can go a couple of days without speaking to anybody. I don’t know whether anyone else experiences this or whether I’m just a weirdo. But I find that when that happens my voice changes, and I always forget how to make a noise, I have to do a warm-up before I go into the world and start speaking again.

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Q15: I was wondering if you ever had to pull out of a project because it felt wrong or something, and what is the point where you say “nope I can’t do this”?

R: Um, no. But that’s partly to do with the fact that I have a lot of loyalty, probably too much loyalty for my own good, really, and there’ve been moment when I’ve been on board a project, and actually it happened this year with The Lodge, I was already on board that project and something else came along which was bigger and better and brighter and more money, and your agent says “look we can pull you out of The Lodge, they can probably recast it,” and here I think “I’ve already started this process, I don’t want to let people down,” and I don’t have a problem with that at all, I never have any regrets over the things that you miss or the things that you decide not to do, I think there’s a strong enough reason why you’ve decided not to do it, but in general no I haven’t ever pulled out of something. There was one television show I remember, I’m not going to say what it is, but after the first readthrough, I did call my agent and asked, “can I get out of this?” And then he quickly got back to me and said, “don’t do it. Don’t build a reputation built on disloyalty.” So I try not to.

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Q18: I think you are very handsome, but your character Francis hated the way he looked, how did that make you feel?

R: Francis hated the way he looked? Yeah. I guess there is something we relate to in that. Without getting too personal, I don’t always enjoy looking at myself in the mirror. I don’t do it very often, to be honest. I do it just to be sure I don’t have food on my face. I do it in character, actually. I do spend a bit of time studying my own face when I’m playing a character, which is interesting because your face does change. (source)

He cannot see the handsomeness: “I think I am odd-looking. I have big lines on my forehead.” I squint, looking for them, but he is talking over me, sounding slightly panicked. “I shouldn’t draw attention to it, because then everyone else will see the oddness.”

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Laziness is what makes him angry: “Laziness in myself. Laziness in other people. And dishonesty. All things I feel capable of myself. I have a propensity to be lazy and lie about it. Fear makes me rageful. There are words in The Crucible I actually find it quite hard to say.” I beg for an example — The Crucible is in the public domain. “No,” he says, “you’ll see it in the play.” I tell him it will make no sense in print if he will not tell me. But he won’t. So I change the subject. It works. “OK, I will give you a line.” He inflates a little and says: “Is there no good penitence but it be public?” And then: “Were I stone I would have cracked for shame this seven month.” (source)

Q: How would you describe your evolution as an actor since you started?

A: I think everything has to do with the fact that today I’m not afraid anymore. At first, I was embarrassed to do something wrong or do things badly or make myself ridiculous. Today, I am almost looking for opportunities to be ridiculous or vulnerable or to make as much of a mistake as possible. In a sense, it’s now the opposite of being undercover.

Q: Are you the actor you dreamed of being when you started?

A: Not yet. I am not yet fearless enough. It’s in waves, actually. But I have already approached this dream. There were moments, especially during Arthur Miller’s The Crucible, which I performed on stage, where I felt I had no control over things. That’s what I’m looking for: to lose control.

Q: You often play bad guys. What do you like in these characters?

A: I like disobedience. I like the fact that you can be disobedient thanks to your creativity. As a person, I must always be polite in life, be careful and correct so as not to hurt anyone. In a fantasy world, I can be as offensive as I want. It’s an outlet. (Laughter)

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Q: Many actors are moving to directing. Is this also your goal?

A: I would like to, but I do not think I’m smart enough. I am good when it comes to working with another’s vision. I do not think I have that creative spontaneity that creates a vision from scratch. But the future will tell. (source)

I applaud Richard for being so open and direct about his fears and insecurities. It takes a lot of bravery to do so. And while I've seen some fans get annoyed with his continual self-deprecation, I think his honesty and openness is much more significant, and shows his inner strength. He doesn't try to pretend to be someone he's not.

He recently described himself as “patient, obsessive, and silly” (source). The patient part is classic Virgo, and the obsessive part comes from an element of his natal chart that I have not mentioned.

The silly part, however, is classic Leo. Like I said above, he has an almost equal amount of Leo and Virgo in his personality. Personally, I'm proud to be a Leo, but I also know we get misunderstood a lot of the time. I wrote the following for an essay of mine on Leos in Disney:

Your sun sign represents your core identity. Just like the physical sun is the center of the solar system and its energy creates life, the astrological sun is our consciousness and life force. Each of the twelve sun signs are ruled by a different planet and element.

Since Leo is the fixed fire sign, we don't inherit the reckless and impulsive nature of fire, but instead are a steady flame. No sign is more reckless and impulsive than Aries, because they have the double combination of being a cardinal sign and a fire sign. Meanwhile, all four of the fixed signs struggle with stubbornness and admitting when their wrong.

Leo's are well known to be natural leaders and the rulers of the zodiac. We are ruled by the sun and our animal is the lion. We dream big and are born with big personalities, and we can't help but be theatrical and dramatic. This means we are always self-centered in the sense of being strong-willed and having a strong sense of self. It does not mean all Leos are egotistical.

Unhealthy Leo traits all revolve around the ego: attention-seeking, egotistical, selfish, bossy, controlling, pushy, jealous, possessive, lazy, vain, arrogant, aggressive, and obstinate.

Healthy Leos, however, are known for our fire-based traits – being animated, theatrical, happy, outgoing, independent, competitive, charismatic, creative, open-minded, open-hearted, confident, assertive, playful, warm, social, courageous, idealistic, affectionate, romantic, optimistic, and adventurous.

What isn't often talked about is our steadiness, our fixed-based traits. Leos are authentic, steadfast, fiercely loyal and protective, consistent, persistent, full-hearted, dedicated, need to do their best, generous and selfless, honorable and moral, genuine and direct, extremely supportive, hard-working and responsible, dignified, strong-willed, and ambitious and determined.

Something that is often mentioned but highly misunderstood is our trait of courage. Having courage doesn't mean you're fearless or reckless. The definition of courage is “the power or quality of dealing with or facing danger, fear, pain, etc.” It means that instead of running away from our problems or denying our emotions; healthy Leos face them and be genuine and direct with ourselves, embracing our vulnerability.

Having a big personality doesn't necessarily mean someone has a big ego. C.S. Lewis once said, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less.” Leos have huge hearts and are incredibly generous. The sun never goes retrograde, always shines, and gives life and energy to all living beings – it isn't selective or discriminatory. Healthy Leos are like mini suns; which is why we are also irrepressibly upbeat, optimistic, and fun-loving.

We're not pushovers. We are like roses – we have both flower petals and thorns. If you mess with someone we love you're going down. We're too loyal and protective to let major things slide; and even if we forgive, we never forget. Little things? We'll try to work them out with you.

Being naturally strong-willed and assertive is healthy – it just means we usually make horrible subordinates and yes people. There's nothing wrong with having high standards and being open about them. In fact, in relationships it's far better in the long run to open and frank about what you need and what you consider a dealbreaker from the beginning.

And oh yes are we ambitious and competitive – but most often with ourselves. We're natural leaders who always dream and think big. For a healthy Leo it's not about being the best, but doing your best. We have to be grand and intense, we're ruled by the sun. It's all or nothing for us. Settling is not something a Leo does. We need to be the best leader, the best friend, the best partner, etc. that we possibly can.

Also, in astrology each sign rules a different body part, and Leo rules the heart and upper back.

Adding to this, Leos are known as the Kings/Queens of the zodiac not because we're egotistical, but because our sun sign is the sun. It's like a double amount sun. I could go into significantly more detail about this, but it involves a lot of technical astrological details; so if anyone wants to know more just message me!

Going back to Richard, having his core self (sun) and love/beauty (venus) in Leo explains why he is an actor and artist; and why he is often warm, silly, and dramatic when he feels comfortable – his long interview with The Anglophile Channel (and it's deleted scenes) does a great job of showing the synergy between his Leo and Virgo sides.

We see Richard express the heartfelt, generous, sincere, and honorable side of Leo all the time. This is why I'm sure he has the inner-confidence and strength hidden within him to overcome the deep pain his Chiron causes him (like it does to us all). I hope he continues to find projects and people that help him on his journey to heal.

Thank you for reading this, I'm wishing him and you all the best. Take care!

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 122

Annnnd WE’RE BACK!

Thank you so much for your patience during the hiatus. Work is still crazy, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel there *crosses fingers*. And I was able to build back up my cushion of chapters, so that was a huge win for me.

As a reminder, this is a skip forward roughly 4 years from chapter 121. So, if you read a bit and start to wonder “wait, did I miss something?”, you probably didn’t and it’s most likely something I am going to circle back to.  Don’t be a afraid to shoot me an ask, however, if you are just really thrown off by something! I’ll gladly clarify unless it’s something plot-specific.

Thanks, as always, go to @baelpenrose, @raven-fae, and @charlylimph-blog.  By the way, Raven is working on a podcast of The Miys, which I am incredibly stoked about. Please follow @glimmeringfeatherspodcast for updates!

I carefully adjusted my glasses as I suppressed a giggle at Noah, who was swarmed with small yellow puffs of fuzz.  In the last seven years since their discovery, Else’s hyper-fast evolution hadn’t slowed down much, although Grey did promise that it had slowed down. Noah buzzed at the puff resting on one of its vomu, eliciting a purr. “I believe they learned this behavior from Mac.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised,” I admitted. “I caught him playing with several of them a couple days ago.”

“I have observed them together on frequent occasions.” Reaching up, it plucked another puff from the top of its head. “I cannot hear if you sit on my sensory organs, podling.”  Soon after Else evolved to the point they could live outside of a habitat tank, Miys had developed a tendency to treat them like its own young, and generally had several of them perched somewhere.

“How many of them are there now?” I asked, reaching out slightly before stopping myself from petting the closest canary-sized fluff. “Else, can I pick you up?”

In response, it bounced onto my hand.  I’d noticed how little they spoke now, but Miys had assured us it was a normal stage in hive-being evolution - once Else became too large to actually fit in our bodies, it wasn’t able to communicate through the translator chip.  At this stage, it could still hear us, but communicating back was a work in process.  Mostly, they just trilled and chirped.

“Currently, there are five hundred and seven thousand, six hundred and twenty-three.”

“They’re very adaptable,” I observed.

With the one free vomu it had, Noah made a nodding gesture. “Most species that reach sentience are. We are able to observe Else’s evolution on a much shorter time scale than most, as well. Consider humanity’s evolution, and imagine seeing it take place in years rather than over the course of millenia.”

“I know,” I laughed. “But seeing it is way more incredible than imagining it.” I adjusted my glasses again, eliciting the buzz that usually meant Noah was exasperated with me.

“Why do humans insist on using those instead of having their eyes repaired?”

“My eyes aren’t damaged,” I reminded it. “And you did repair my eyes. I’m wearing these because my eyes are working right. You know this.”

“In principle, not in practice.”

It was my turn to sigh. “Our eyes evolved to work in a specific kind of light. Earth’s sun is yellow, I think? But Von’s sun is more blue.” I gestured at the light emitters in the corridor. “When the light is in the twilight cycle like this, some humans can’t see as well as we could in Earth-twilight. Hence the glasses.”

“Sight is so inefficient.”

I just shook my head. I couldn’t exactly argue. “Between the light and the gravity, it’s been a huge adjustment.”

“You have all adjusted in quite - innovative ways,” Noah replied. “My kind have done many of these relocations. Not all species adapt well.”

“What was it you called it?” I squinted, both from trying to see what was ahead of me and from thinking. I’m going to have to talk to someone about some flashlights, I swear… “We ‘persist’?”

“Humans are remarkably stubborn, yes,” it confirmed. “As Arthur Farro seems to prefer explaining it, your species began space travel by attaching chemical ignition drives to your posteriors.”

Even after so long, some things just did not translate. “Yep, we very much strapped a rocket to our asses to achieve spaceflight,” I laughed. “Everything on Earth kind of evolved and adapted like that. We learned what wouldn’t poison us by watching others die from eating it, that kind of thing. Even our superstitions, and later our laws, were basically ‘hey, let’s not do this, it kills people’.” A liw made its way into my line of sight, rocking to mimic a confused head-tilt. “You rescued us for our sight, not because we are a particularly bright species.”

“I understand that the polite thing to do, according to your customs, is to object to that statement, however I have been told on several occasions that I lack any skill in falsehoods.”

“We bombed ourselves back to the Stone Age the second we hit our highest peak in technology.” I reached out and patted what would have been a shoulder on a human. “You don’t have to lie about that. Arthur has studied an absurd percentage of human history. Even from a scholarly perspective, I am assured we are a singularly idiotic race. Besides, we’d already ruined an entire planet at that point...”

“It has evidenced itself to be a lesson well-learned.” It returned the pat, gently. “For a species historically inclined to warfare, those on the Yjq have demonstrated a profound proclivity toward peace.”

“Trying to keep it that way, bud,” I admitted.

Removing yet another puff from its sensory organs, Noah continued. “Please be assured, also, that Terrans are far from ‘singularly’ idiotic.  There are many species in the Galactic Community that are demonstrably lacking in what you refer to as ‘common sense’.”

Noah was still a terrible gossip. “Do tell,” I asked, crossing my mental fingers that we weren’t the worst out there.

“Preeyar,” it listed immediately.

“The rift-valley avians?”

“The same. They experience terrible reactions to liquid water, and yet they are fascinated by fountains and insist upon touching them!” Startled chirps erupted as all six appendages on Noah’s upper body flung out in frustration. “Any vessel transporting Preeyar has specific instructions on how to treat the resulting burns.”

I had to admit, that was pretty bad. “Terrans at least learn not to touch things that will burn us by the time we can speak, usually.” My nose tickled as several little Else-puffs migrated over to me, upset by the grand gesture from my friend.  I was almost glad it was so difficult for humans to see in the corridor, because I probably looked absurd.

“Shalt’krii are somehow just as difficult,” Noah confessed. “As a species that have what you term an ‘allergy’ to sonic waves - they develop painful rashes and can have seizures when exposed. Yet, it is entirely inevitable when transporting a large group that several will have forgotten or neglected to bring dampeners.”

“Oh my gosh,” I gasped, trying not to laugh and upset Else again. “How?”

“It has eluded the Galactic Council since they joined. The dampeners are far less barbaric than what the So-K’nor do to resolve a similar concern, but I must privately admit that the So-K’nor are at least more consistent and effective.”

Well, yeah, deliberately deafening yourself permanently when you go off-world tends to be that way, I thought to myself. I knew I didn’t need to say it out loud, but I also knew that Noah would not address my thoughts out loud. “Okay, maybe we aren’t that bad,” I granted. “I think the worst we do is ingest mild poisons.”

“On an alarmingly frequent basis, yes. Including plants native to your world that actually attempt to digest you as you eat them.”

I shook my head. “Not this girl. I don’t like pineapple.”

“And the number of humans on the ship who willingly consume lactic acid, knowing it will cause them digestive distress?” If it had eyebrows, they would be arching, I just knew it.

“You have pointed out several times over the years that you can’t taste,” I pointed out. “So you have no idea how tempting cheese can be.”

Noah shook one vomu like a head. “Incorrect. Having witnessed the sheer amount of it that Tyche consumed once she realized that you were not lactose intolerant, there is empirical evidence to support your claim.”

Unconsciously, my hand jumped to touch my left ear before I could force it down. “I remember the spicy food,” I said carefully, stroking one of the fluffs on my arms. “But I didn’t know about the cheese. Come to think of it - “ I stopped in my tracks and turned to face Noah directly, “Why weren’t the consoles just adjusted to make all the food… I dunno, lactose-free, I guess?”

Two liw reached to pluck several yellow beings from my arms and head as Noah used one vomu to start ticking reasons. “One, because I was specifically asked not to by Grey Hodenson and Xiomara Kalloe, the consensus being that bovines are, in fact, in the genetic database. Two, because that was attempted several weeks before you were brought on board, and I was tempted to damage my sensory organs to block out the sheer number of complaints regarding how everything tasted.”  Thankfully, its vomu was still empty when it flung outward. “Do you have any idea how difficult it is to accommodate requests regarding something you do not experience?”

I felt slightly ashamed. “Not entirely, no.” Trying to lighten the mood slightly, I felt the need to point out “Besides, I really like goat cheese.”

“Something about chetter and mootsareeleh,” Noah grumbled.

“Ohhhhh,” I whispered. “Eyeah… do not mess with Italians’ mozzarella, I have learned. And cheddar does have a very specific flavor. I can see those being very loud complaints.”

“In eight Terran years, I am still confused why the color of the chetter is a determining factor, as well as how something so soft can be compared to an edged weapon.”

I felt like I was going to explode from suppressed laughter. I had to stop, tears streaming down my face, and catch my breath. “Oh, Noah… I honestly don’t know if I can explain that, but I can try…”

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[sillyandquiteawkward]

little father and bayley fic under the cut bc i forgot my ao3 password and im lazy. hope you enjoy

Food supplements and leafy greens sat on Doctor Bayley's plate, which he picked at distastefully. The Director of the Institute, Father, sat across from him, making decent headway with his own meal.

"I don't think I can ever learn to enjoy the food supplements. This flavor isn’t palatable either," Bayley curtly complained with a heavy sigh. He felt Father's lingering judgement upon him for refusing most of his meal again, without even having to look up. He poked at the slab of supplement with the tines of his fork. Even the various flavors the Institute boasted of supplements couldn't save Bayley from the pastes, powders, and bars turning his stomach. He was trying his best to find a flavor he could stand, but to Bayley, even mirelurk was easier to eat. At least the fresh vegetables were decent, if not simply boiled or baked if cooked at all. "I'd kill for some real meat on your menu."

"Come now, Doctor, we have little need to slaughter irradiated animals for food in this day and age. BioScience has developed the perfect meal dozens of times over, consisting of the exact amount of daily nutrients a man like yourself needs," Father replies coolly. Bayley glared at the older man. Of course he'd like them -- he grew up on the damn things. Well, Bayley grew up on real food!

"Designed a food that doesn't even fill your stomach," he mumbled behind his mug as he took a sip. Now to their credit, this was something Bayley actually liked. The coffee wasn't stale 200 year old beans and grounds. My god, they perfected the damn synthetic coffee and Bayley couldn't imagine going back.

Father confidently smirked, passing smoothly over Bayley's remark with a gentle shake of his head. "You poor surface dwellers, eating any and all the food you can scrounge to stave off hunger. I'm glad we were able to save you from that life. Give it time, Doctor. Your stomach will re-adjust to your new diet."

Bayley scoffed dismissively and set his fork down to keep nursing his coffee. Father took his own sip of tea. The pair fell into a dip of silence, accompanied by the gentle clink of silverware against plate as Father continued to finish off his lunch. Behind them a few tables over, there was a slight chatter from another pair of scientists in the cafeteria. Licking a crumb of food supplement left on the edge of his mug with a grimace, Bayley listened to their distant hushed conversation. Sounded like gossip about another scientist’s love affair... Hard to believe that even the “perfect” Institute could be filled with, what was ultimately, humans.

Father spoke up after a minute of Bayley straining to eavesdrop, "Why don't you tell me about yourself, Doctor?"

"...Why?" Bayley eyed Father suspiciously. "Don't you already know all about me? Isn't that why I'm here?"

Father took a warm sip of his mug before continuing. "I know about your reputation, or lack thereof." Bayley all but growled at the dig. "And I know you care deeply for the progress of humanity, as do I, albeit a tad misguided. You’re a highly intelligent man, Doctor, but I'm afraid I don't know about you, personally. I'd like to remedy that."

What could Bayley tell Father about? Why should he? Oh, but he loved to talk about himself... Bayley leaned back in his chair with folded hands in his lap, food left forgotten on his plate. "What is there to say? I'm a man married to his work, who likes breathing fresh air. On the surface."

“What got you into studying radiation?” Bayley noticed Father missed his complaint, or at least was ignoring it. “Surely you didn’t set out from the start on such a dangerous fascination.” Father had a look of curiosity on his face that seemed genuine to Bayley, although he still had suspicions this had ulterior motives.

“It was almost from the beginning actually. As I studied medicine in my youth, traveling along the Wasteland, I have to admit,” Bayley paused to consider his wording. “I had a distinct admiration of the ghoul’s ability to utilize radiation to build themself anew. The destructive power of radiation makes using it dangerous and even deadly, true, but I imagined a world where we could manipulate the human body to replicate how a ghoul’s body uses the gamma particles destructive properties to heal themselves, sans the ghoulification process of course.” Okay, so maybe he planned to be cagey, but Father just had to ask him about the thing he’s devoted his entire life to. Sorry, he’s gonna get excited. “I’d seen first hand ghouls reattach long lost limbs to themselves and remain functional, ferals even being brought back to life by glowing ones’ radiation bursts, and the stories of people growing functional limbs from radiation exposure caught my particular attention at a young age.”

“Fascinating things ghouls are, although their rotten brains and appearance are less than desirable. If anything their longevity is what catches my attention. Living over hundreds of years...” Father drifts off, looking past Bayley. “Imagine what one could achieve with that extra time.”

“Living forever doesn’t matter if you aren’t healthy,” Bayley corrected. “What’s the point of living if you are just suffering every day. I’m focusing myself to helping people in this day and age, instead of chasing functional immortality.”

“Maybe that’s the difference between us,” Father sighs. “Everything I do is for tomorrow, and tomorrow’s tomorrow. Humanity's future lies in our successor’s hands. It’s a shame we cannot directly work with our future generations to combine our knowledge. All we can do is help prepare them for when we are gone.”

“Eventually people in charge need to step down and let the fresh ideas in, otherwise we’ll collectively stagnate. We are stubborn creatures who hate change, snuffing out ideas that contradict our own. If someone like you lived forever, he’d never give up the reins.”

“I suppose you’d do the same,” Father states blandly, eyes half-lidded. “As you said, we are stubborn creatures.”

Bayley sputters, sitting back up in his chair. “No, I am the innovator in this scenario! I’ve been ostracized for my ideas, kicked out and shunned. No one sees my potential to change the world!”

“And in your age, have you begun to prepare an heir to your scientific knowledge, Doctor? Or do you think you can finish this chronicle yourself, with the few years left in your life?”

“I-I have to prove myself first! No one trusts my work because they don’t see the proof -- which I was working on when you so kindly stole me away from my clinic and subjects!” Bayley hissed, gripping the edge of the table.

Unphased, Father folded his hands on the table. “I trust your work, Doctor Bayley. I’ve seen your studies, seen what you can do when you are truly devoted to a cause. This is why I wanted you with us at the Institute. I want you to share your knowledge to us, so that we may pass it to the future with us. Let us help you ensure your legacy. We have the same goals, and we even have similar methods if you can believe it. Imagine what we can do together when we combine our knowledge, for humanity’s sake.”

Bayley raised an eyebrow at that. “Similar goals perhaps, but I wont be a part of the kidnapping and killing of Commonwealth citizens. You Institute folk are outrageously barbaric for all your self-righteousness.”

“We simply know how to weigh the importance of breaking a few eggs for the omelette. You too understand this principle closely, don’t you?”

Bayley grimaced flatly. “You truly know how to charm a man to your side.” This conversation was over if Bayley had anything to say about it, which he did. He gulped from his mug, keeping it up to his mouth as he turned physically away from Father. He’ll finish this and go back to his room. Trapped in the Institute with these madmen, forced to go along with things else suffer the same fate as the hundreds of others taken to the Institute. And Father had the gall to act like they were the same, that Bayley could excuse innocents murdered for “science.” He slammed the mug back onto the table.

“I hope you’ll understand one day soon, Doctor. I really do.” Father sighed, closing his eyes in defeat as Bayley stood up.

“I don’t want to understand,” Bayley said as he stormed past Father back to the concourse.

It was too much to think about, if Bayley was being honest with himself. He grit his teeth climbing the stairs, tense. A scientist descending the stairs stood to the side as Bayley passed, clearly wanting to give the angry man some space and avoid any conflict. Good. If he was to stay here, people should give way for him. Now if only Father was like that. He passed a pair of expressionless generation two synth guards eyeing their laser weapons as he ascended the next flight.

God, he was annoyed. Of course Father had to go ruin another meal together talking nonsense of Bayley hurting others. He tried his best not to hurt his subjects -- everyone was willing and importantly, no one had died under his care! Sick perhaps in the early days... but it wasn’t death! Bayley couldn’t stand the idea his great idea could possibly kill others when it was supposed to be helping them. If he was ever responsible for someone’s death...

Bayley slid open the automatic door to his small, barren room. It was just a simple bed and desk, which was plenty for Bayley, but he wished he had his trinkets and such if he was going to be living here until the day he dies. He collapsed onto the stiff bed, face pressing against the cool pillow. He missed his couch. He missed his clinic. Bayley even considered he missed being annoyed by Jonathan and Jay’s antics. Jay would try his best to cheer him out of this spiraling train of thought, and Jon would know plenty of things to distract him with.

If he was ever responsible for their deaths, Bayley considered he’d quit on the spot. He’d probably become deeply depressed until he really did just curl up and die, however fast it came after. All his life’s work to save humanity, and he’d killed the only people who trusted him most to do so.

But the truly terrible part of him hidden away deep in his heart wondered that if someone was to die as a result of his work, perhaps even if he wasn’t working willingly with the Institute, that he'd simply wouldn’t care.

[ms-gallows]

Astrological signs for Anakin Skywalker!

I mostly just focused on the signs and planets, not on the houses that they fell into, so there may be some inconsistencies! I might change these later the more I learn, but this is just for fun! Here is my take on Anakin! (with some minor Obi-Wan analysis for comparison!) Read Obi-Wan’s interpretation here. Edit: I changed Anakin’s moon!

Before I get into this, I want to explain the elements and the modes: Air = thoughts/intellect Earth = materialism/pragmatism Water = emotion/spiritualism Fire = Action/Instinct 

Cardinal = initiative Fixed = stability Mutable = adaptability

Anakin has mostly Fire and Water, making him active and emotional. He has just enough air to give him an unconventional intellect. He is also Cardinal and Fixed dominant, which gives him initiative and stability (not often a word you would describe Anakin with!). He has a beautifully intense chart, this boy belongs in a Gothic novel. Lord Byron would be proud.

Scorpio Ascendant: The ascendant is our mask or ‘filter’. It is the first layer of our personality, what we show to people before they truly know us. Anakin processes the world around him through the lens of a Scorpio; with high emotional intensity and an almost psychic perception. He is reserved with most people around him, he keeps his guard up like a Scorpio. Most of the time he keeps quiet, letting Obi-Wan do the talking with his more chatty Libra Ascendant. Scorpio Ascendants also look very intense, and may come across as cold to people. Unlike Obi-Wan’s airy Libra, Scorpio has a very heavy presence, because it’s a fixed sign. It has the intensity of a black hole. 

He’s not going to budge an inch, until he knows that he’s safe around you. 

This is probably why Anakin comes across as a loner most of the time, even though this boy is like ‘im so lonely please love me i’m so lonely’. When people get to know Anakin better, and he lets his guard down, they get a glimpse of his core Aries self (Obi-Wan is very familiar with this side). 

Aries Sun: The Sun is the ‘core’ part of the personality. Anakin is an Aries Sun, a fiery cardinal sign, making him highly action-oriented. Anakin seems to have a lot of trouble staying still, always needing to do something with his body or work with his hands. He needs to see the fruits of his labors right now dammit.

Anakin often gets typed as a Scorpio Sun, however I think Scorpio, for all of its emotional volatility, can be frighteningly calculating. Scorpio Sun likes to hide in the shadows, waiting patiently for the perfect opportunity to strike. Anakin broods like a Scorpio, but he has the impatience of an Aries, and carries out most of his actions like an Aries.

His Aries Sun is very active, always on the move, acting on its feelings almost without thought. Anakin seems to be flying by the seat of his pants in most areas of life. He’s also naturally pretty fiery and competitive, having no issue with showing off. Anakin is restless, he has an urge to push boundaries and to experience everything. He’s very open, and his moon blends in easily with this. It’s this fire and action-oriented cardinal energy that has given him drive to become a Jedi, and probably his Aquarius/Scorpio that gives him the follow-through. Cardinal energy wants to lead, and Anakin is a natural-born leader. It comes more naturally to him than to Obi-Wan’s mutable Virgo!

Moon in Sagittarius Leo: The moon is our vulnerabilities, our emotions, and our maternal instinct. It is the side of ourselves that comes out when we are most comfortable. I thought that Anakin was a Sagittarius moon, since he seems given to sensory experiences. The more I saw how he interacted with Ahsoka, however, I’m starting to think he is in fact a Leo Moon. His emotions are wrapped in his pride. I remember the idea that Anakin wants more than what a Jedi’s life offers, even though he shouldn’t. He has strong desires. There is a nobility to Leo, fiercely protective of what it claims as its own. The way he tells Ahsoka he would never let anyone hurt her makes me think of a lion protecting its cub. Anakin is so fiercely protective of her, he sneers at the mere implication that Asajj sees a part of herself in her. With Padme, he wants to express his love in grand, dramatic gestures, probably in ways that he wishes he could show the whole world, but he can’t. He wants to save people who are suffering and right wrongs in a very grandiose manner. It feels like a divine calling, a narrative in which he is the main character, it is his purpose in life. This is how Anakin mothers the people he loves. Extreme, devout protection and gestures of adoration. Just think of a Lion’s majesty and ferocity, and you’ve got Anakin’s moon. 

Mercury in Aquarius: Mercury is all about how we understand things, think, and communicate. Anakin’s Aquarius Mercury is having a hard time breathing with all these fire and water signs around it. This is where Anakin’s unconventional thought patterns come from. Anakin will come up with a solution to a problem that is very unexpected. Anakin’s action-driven Sun, his possibility-driven Moon, and his forward-thinking Aquarius Mercury combine to make him a very daring pilot. Honestly it makes him very daring in many areas. His Aquarius Mercury is fascinated by tech and creating new things with it. He also doesn’t care much for social etiquette, and may even be amused by saying something blunt. He has a taste for innovation. Him and Obi-Wan having Mercury signs in air makes me think that’s why their banter is so amusing. They are both quick witted in this regard.

Venus in Scorpio: Venus rules romance, aesthetics, and taste. Oh boy, this is a doozy. Where do I start?

Having a water-based Venus is compatible with Obi-Wan’s water-based Moon. Water signs are compatible with other water-signs. However, there is a problem: Obi-Wan’s moon only comes out when he feels completely comfortable to do so. That happens extremely rarely. 

Anakin’s Venus is pulling at Obi-Wan’s Moon, demanding that Obi-Wan share a part of himself that Obi-Wan only shows when he feels absolutely safe to do so. Unfortunately, being a Jedi, it’s never safe to do so. Scorpio probes, which might even feel parasitic to Obi-Wan.  Obi-Wan will block it out, because it’s sensitive, it hurts. Anakin interprets this as a rejection, and thinks that he did something wrong, when it’s really just not the way Obi-Wan expresses his love (most of the time). That said, the detail-orientation of Obi-Wan’s Venus and his emotionally-psychic moon are extremely precise in detecting Anakin’s mood-changes and feelings.

(Obi-Wan’s Moon/Venus: “I love you but I don’t know how to deal with this.”)

Anakin’s love is raw. It is an all-consuming type of love, it’s like an addiction, a drug. Anakin wants to know the depths of someone’s soul, he wants to know someone’s deepest traumas and demons, to accept them and love them for all that they are, because ultimately that is what he craves for himself.

This kind of love is extremely intimidating to Obi-Wan’s gentle Virgo Venus and sensitive Cancer Moon. I don’t think Padme really knows how to deal with it either. I don’t think he’s shown all of it to her.

Scorpio Venus, along with his Scorpio Ascendant, makes Anakin very possessive and stubborn. This doesn’t mean that Scorpio Venuses are bad, only that they have an urge to take things to an extremely intense depth that most others don’t feel comfortable going to. Not everyone sees that as love. A Scorpio Venus has to learn that not everything has to go that deep, and that boundaries need to be respected.

On the plus side, you can probably tell your deepest secrets and insecurities to Anakin, and he won’t tell a soul. He’ll probably feel closer to you. 

Suspecting rejection, Anakin thinks he has to prove how much he loves someone, so that they don’t let him go. I think of the scene where Anakin gives his lightsaber to Padme, as a symbol of his life and love (I also suspect that Padme is probably a Cancer Ascendant, which would explain Anakin being drawn to her because she has a mothering, caring energy that he wants in love). Anakin doesn’t realize that he doesn’t have to go to these extreme lengths to prove that he loves someone, he doesn’t see that they already love him. He feels wrong and broken, and he wants someone who can heal his soul, when he really needs to look inwards and heal himself.

A Scorpio Venus can also take things very personally and become wrathful. Scorpio has a divine wrath, it is complete and utter destruction. Anakin is fire and ice, he burns everything to ash and freezes it over.

(Anakin’s Leo Moon/Scorpio Venus: “Why are you leaving me? What did I do wrong?”)

Losing someone he loves is death itself to him. When he speaks to Master Unduli about not giving up on Ahsoka, the thought of losing her looks like it physically pains him. 

In short: Anakin not properly dealing with his Scorpio Venus/Leo Moon is probably the cause of his fall. 

Also: Scorpios like darkness and intensity. To them, it is the most real, the most deep. Explains why Anakin likes black, huh?

Mars in Aries Scorpio: Mars rules passion, war, instinct, and sexuality. An Scorpio Mars is a planet in the sign of its old rulership! It is not as potent as Aries, but I changed it because I examined the way Anakin goes to war. He is more likely, at least later on, to use underhanded and sneaking tactics. This is where he becomes very cold, calculating, unyielding. Having a third inner planet (Ascendant sort of counts as a planet) in Scorpio makes his personality slightly unbalanced. There’s a LOT of Scorpio here, a lot of intense emotions that he has difficulty understanding. He can never completely express himself, there is something he’s always holding back, and he doesn’t even know what it is that he’s holding back.  

When it comes to sexuality, this is another area where Anakin gets possessive. This is where not only his Mars, but his Scorpio Venus and Leo Moon all come out to play. The eroticism is ridiculous. It’s wild, uninhibited, dark, passionate, emotional, and probably loud. What a drama queen. He’s easily aroused and wants to give everything he can to his partner. Having Scorpio in the planets of love and sexuality makes his expressions of love tinged with darkness. He probably has a dominant edge and wants to explore dark taboos. He wants to utterly consume his partner and have them consume him in return. This is an intense sensory and emotional experience for him, and he wants the best. His ideal is a luxurious bed with candles, a beautiful moonlit view, and nobody else for miles. Leaving his partners exhausted and satisfied is what he strives for, and he’d wish they could do this forever. Aries/Leo/Scorpio make his head, back, and well...his genitals, his erogenous zones, respectively.

[inkykeiji]

every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem-solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. can u describe how you express your creative side if u don’t mind me asking?

hello anon!! interesting question!!! and of course i don’t mind! <3 i’m just a little confused, because you’re seeing it expressed, right here on my blog, nearly every day!!! writing is the main way i express myself creatively. i know i’ve said this before, many many times, but my writing is very special, personal, and important to me. i use it for several different outlets: to explore myself and my trauma more, to comfort myself, to examine my own thoughts, opinions and beliefs on the complexity of morality and love, etc etc etc. i mentioned this in the tags yesterday but just a day ago i wrote myself a small piece that just kind of examined my trauma against dabi’s by using the ages we were when certain events happened. i’m still unsure if i’m going to share it online, because it’s very personal, but even that right there is an example of me using writing to both work through trauma AND provide myself comfort.

aside from writing, i love photography and film. taking photos (especially 35mm film photos!) is fun, even if i’m terrible at it. i hope to get better soon, though!!! with more practice and experience! i’ve been writing screenplays since i was in high school and short stories since i was a child (!!!), and i enjoy making short films with my friends <3 we haven’t done that in a while, though, thanks to covid :/ i also journal a lot; mostly stream of consciousness journaling, memory journaling, and i have a journal for art i encounter (films and classic literature) where i like to examine them, just for fun because i genuinely enjoy that. then i have several journals for my own writing (plot and character development stuff!)

may i ask why you’re interested/what sparked that interest in you? :o i too am very fascinated with creativity; more people’s creative processes than anything else, because i find that’s a really personal thing (as is creativity itself) and we all kind of have different processes purely because we’re all unique people with our own set of life experiences, influences, work habits, beliefs etc.