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sorry the dalamud mention in the outfit one hit me like a brisk smack to the face i can't believe i never put 2 and 2 together but she would totally have been on ffxiv 1.0... may not be a question you have an answer for so apologies, but do you think there's any particular job she prefers playing as?
1.0 gamer toriumi is like my favorite joke KJSJHBFD i actually made it here first (but im gonna keep making it)
it would be so funny if 1.0 was her "home game" after ISO closed. shes like im never getting attached again fuck this 😭
evidence in the comic suggests she does still play xiv though. and i feel like shes enough of a level grinding enthusiast to have every job maxed. but i dont know what her main would be at all. so i'm opening the floor to my followers
#for my au plot purposes ofc shes been kind of a roamer who would check out basically any game that looks interesting#even if (especially if?) it's dying/dead#and shes a pc gamer so she roams pretty far. i think she finds it interesting#but she does play alive games too. she IS a gamer 4 life who needs her game & drinky tiem after all.
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sits very niceys. do you perhaps have any hcs on how the mtl freaks would play splatoon. flutters eyelashes
SMILES i added mag and mma for you king
nathan - explosher (OBVIOUSLY) and hydra splatling main. very aggressive playstyle, like yeah he's playing turf war but he needs to get that fucking guy right now. still ends up with the most turf inked though. plays in absolute silence and doesn't show any emotion if he wins or loses. its the autism stare. plays turf war and rainmaker mainly. his character is an inkling.
pickles - whatever weapon is the most annoying in the meta. very annoying to play against because he doesn't help for the objective at all and just likes to be a shithead to the other team. he gets gamer rage often. plays turf war only, and jumps on comp to fuck with his bandmates. his character is an octoling
charles - splatana and undercover brella main. he is probably the best player out of the band only because he is a team player. he communicates as much as he can in game and only wants to break his controller sometimes. he's reigning in that rage for the punching bag later. plays anarchy battle. all modes. he's scarily good at it. also salmon run and is eggescutive vp. his character is an octoling.
skwisgaar - e-liter 4k scope dickhead. he loves spawncamping people. especially when he plays with the other guitarists because it ends up making them extremely mad. he's not that good but he always brags when he gets a 4 kill without even trying. don't look at his win loss record though. plays turf war but is surprisingly good in salmon run. his character is an inkling.
murderface - crash blaster main. he got killed by one 10 times in one match and now has made it his goal to learn this weapon out of fucking spite. very aggressive and very prone to gamer rage and rage quiting when hes losing. he plays turf war and anarchy but is hard stuck in b rank due to rage quits. his character is an inkling.
toki - dualies squelchers and splattershot main. like murderface is also angry at the game and rage quits often. he likes turf war the most obviously but always tries to play anarchy battle and keeps losing and throws his controller in the wall. he's broken like 5 at this point. he's decent at salmon run though. when he doesnt get fucked by weapon selection. his character is an octoling.
abigail - nzap 89 main. is just there for a good time. she tried playing with the guys and saw how mad they got so she just solo queues and has fun! she does not need anymore stress in her life, and yet she still plays salmon run with charles who treats it like it's life or death. she is eggescutive but at what cost....she likes tableturf battle too. her character is an octoling.
knubbler - flingza roller and l-3 nozzlenose main. the only person alive good at clam blitz and the only person who can play the nozzlenoze. he also is the only person who enjoys clam blitz too. its crazy. he's like s rank all because of clam blitz alone. he also spends all his money on the stupidest outfit combos ever that dont even give him good stats. love wins i guess. his character is an inkling
magnus - splatana and splatling main but he's bad at both. he's good with the splattershot but refuses to play that weapon because he wants to look cool and these weapons will in his mind be able to kill more people in game. well he doesnt and he goes into gamer rage because he got spawncamped but some guy using meta weapons its niot fair for fucks sake. into turf war and occasinally anarchy abttles but again. angry. mma got tired of his annoying ass and broke his switch. his character was an inkling.
mma - doesnt play video games. would be a nautlius main though and play anarchy only. he would also be an octoling.
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Five times they behaved liked an old married couple and one time they really were
Written for MalexWeek 2020, Day 2. Fic Prompt: Trope Day.
Summary: They found their way back together.
The fic actually contains 2 tropes: 90% of “The Old Married Couple” and 10% of “Shipper on Deck” because I like cliches SO MUCH.
------------------------
1. Bickering
They had been staring at each other across the booth in Crashdown for five minutes now.
Michael broke down first. “Looks like they all bail on us.”
Alex snorted. “Gee, what clued you in? Is it the fact that we’ve been sitting here for half an hour now and still no one showed up? Or the texts we JUST received from our so-called friends declaring they all have to ‘BAIL ON US’?” He even made the air quote gesture, the bastard.
So something crawled over someone’s ass and died today. “Really? Your are gonna be like this.”
Alex ignored him. Great.
“Do you want me to leave?” He asked, and pathetically hoped Alex would say no. Because even a snappy Alex was still better than no Alex at all.
Alex answered his question with a question. Of course he did. “Do YOU want to leave?”
Michael shook his head, and decided to throw in some moment of truth. “Honestly? I think they set us up, because in the past two weeks I may or may not have whined many times to them about how much I missed you.”
Alex seemed oddly angered by that. “Well, you sure have a funny way of showing that. Because last time I checked, my phone number is still the same, and I go to the same bar and the same diner on a daily basis, safe to say I’m not the hardest person to find.”
Michael muttered something under his breath.
“What is that? I crack code, I don’t read lips.”
“I said I didn’t want to see you dating someone else!” Shit. That was a mistake.
Alex froze for a moment, then he said, slowly. “You mean you don’t want to see me dating after you and my best friend ended your relationship which lasted almost ONE YEAR right in front of me?”
Michael deflated. “OK. That’s fair. But I really missed you. Can’t we just like, be friends? We’re still friends, right?” He might sound a little too desperate, but he honestly didn’t care anymore.
“I don’t know, Michael”, shit, why did he always have this chill when Alex called his first name? It’s like Pavlovian reaction at this point. “How do we do it? Say ‘what’s up, bro’ every time we see each other?”
So he really was gonna be like that. Well, takes two to tango.
“Or we could, you know, discuss our mutual dislike of the disgusting eating habit of dipping the fries in the milk shake thing”, he pretended to think for a moment, “oh, sorry I forgot. It’s only MY dislike.”
Alex smiled at that. He took a fry, dipped it into his milkshake, threw it into his mouth, chewed, swallowed, and then said, still smiling sweetly, “Yet you screamed so loud that one time when I dipped your cock into the milkshake and licked it clean.”
Michael choked on his clean, fry-crumbs-free milkshake. “You are not playing fair.”
“And you’re surprised? I didn’t climb the military ladder so fast by being nice.” Alex smirked.
Michael smirked right back. “Yeah, you’re kind of a sore loser. You didn’t speak to me for two days when I beat you at Mario Kart”.
“That’s because you cheated!”
“How does one cheat at MARIO KART?”
“I don’t know! Maybe you used your Tele...” Alex stopped himself abruptly when their waitress appeared to ask them if they needed some refill.
They both declined and headed right back into their argument about who was the better gamer.
When Michael finally stood up to get their bills (they argued about who should pay the bills too, Michael won), it was already two hours later, and they both had a big smile on their faces.
Alex watched Michael go to the cashier, a little too intensely, so he didn’t notice the little old lady at first, she had to wave her hand in front of him to get his attention.
He turned to her, confused. “Uh, can I help you?”
She patted on his shoulder. “My husband and I were like this too”, she said, wistfully, “we used to bicker all the time, but our hearts were in the right place”, she looked at Michael’s direction and back to Alex, “you and your young man are gonna be just fine.” She patted him once more, and went away.
Huh.
——————————————
2. Finishing each other’s sentences
They were at the supermarket together when Alex said, “why...”
“Does Liz need so many eggs? Beats me. She said she needs them to do some kind of experiment, but I highly suspect it.”
“And why...”
“Did she send us to get these? According to her, we need the legwork and some fresh air because she said and I quote, you are talking in codes and I reek of oil at this point.”
“I’m...”
“Getting a little annoyed by me right now? You want me to stop finishing your sentences? Well, it’s not my fault you are this predictable.” He was asking for trouble, Michael knew. But he couldn’t help it. Alex and Forrest had broken up for a week now, and Alex still didn’t tell him, he had to be informed by Izzy, it was a little irritating.
Alex narrowed his eyes. “You think you know me so well.”
“Apparently I do.” He smiled innocently.
“You’re not that complex either, you know”, Alex stepped forward, right into his personal space, “I can read you like an open book.”
So it was game on.
For the next two weeks, they were trying their best to beat each other to the punch, finishing each other’s sentences, sometimes even saying things before the other could even open his mouth.
Kyle snapped at last.
“Would you PLEASE stop?” He groaned, “We get it. You’re dating now and you are stupidly in love and you know each other SO WELL. Just, get a room, OK? Other people are still trying to find their soulmates or something.”
“We are not...” They spoke at the same time.
“Great, you’re upgrading to saying things unanimously now?” Kyle threw his hand into the air. “I give up.”
They both blushed. Unanimously.
——————————————
3. Touching casually
They were both leaning onto the table to study some printed out files from another secret government agency that Alex found and hacked, Alex was writing out code patterns to determine which one fit the file, when Michael suddenly discovered something.
In a hurry to write down his thoughts, he didn’t try to get another pen. He reached out, grabbed Alex’s pen-holding hand, and wrote down a keyword. His head bowed beneath Alex’s chin, some of his curls brushed his face, so Alex used his free hand to brush it away, he lingered a moment there, as Michael finished writing the word but his hand stayed there, thumb gently rubbing Alex’s in a slow circle.
Then Alex pulled away, and they continued discussing the file.
Things escalated real fast after that.
At first it was just a hand on the back, a pat on the shoulder, that sort of things. But then they often stood near enough that their hips were touching, Michael sometimes threw his arm around Alex’s shoulder when they were laughing together, or Alex would play with Michael’s hair when they were sitting on the same side of the booth, listening to their friends or talking to them. It was nothing sexual, they were friends, friends stayed in each other’s personal space ALL THE TIME, right?
Then one day, they were having a group movie night. They decided to sit on the sofa, so naturally no one else wanted to sit on it. With that much room, they sat down, a foot or so between them.
Halfway through the movie though, Alex was rubbing his right knee. Michael took one glance at him, and immediately sat beside him. He lifted Alex’s right leg onto his left, and put his hand on Alex’s knee. Alex let out a moan.
The whole group was looking at them now. Alex blushed.
“I, his hand...” Alex took a breath and regained some control back, “you all know aliens run hot right? His hand is like a thermos, it’s good for my knee.”
“You know”, Liz began, “You don’t need to explain here. People do this all the time for their loved ones, it’s sweet.”
“But”, Isobel cut in, stopping whatever Alex was trying to say, “next time, don’t do it in front of us, maybe? If I hear my brother-in-law moan again when I die, it’ll still be too soon.”
“Guys, stop teasing them”, Max said, at which point Alex had already given up, “they’re not even dating”.
“Yeah”, Maria went in for the final blow, “because the old married couple don’t date anymore. You guys really should make more of an effort if you want to keep the sparks alive, you know?”
“You mean we should just ditch you all to enjoy our little world, just the two of us?” Alex crooked his head, playing along.
“Aww, honey, you’d do that for me, for us? I thought you said we should keep our friends company or they’d be too boring a bunch.” Michael added.
He never took his hand off Alex’s knee.
——————————————
4. Pet names
“Darlin’, I’m home!” Michael called out, as he entered their secret base.
Kyle looked up, confused. “Since when did you begin to use pet names for each other?”
Alex didn’t even spare Michael a glance. “I didn’t. He is just being a dick.”
“Oh, sweetheart, you wound me. And you’re such a pretty liar, considering you called me ‘Mikey’ just the other day.”
“Sarcastically, yes.” Alex rolled his eyes. “Now would you please cut the bullshit and come look at this?”
Michael fluttered his eyelashes: “For you, sweet cheeks? Of course.”
Kyle wanted to leave. He also wanted to die a little.
Then Alex turned his full attention to Michael, and said in an almost robotic voice. “Gee, you are so kind, my little teddy bear.”
Kyle was wrong. He didn’t want to die a little. He wanted to die A LOT.
Michael, on the other hand, smiled like a cat finally got the cream. “Don’t mention it, pumpkin.”
His eyes twinkling, his tone teasing. But there was also genuine softness and gentleness in his overall demeanor, like he was standing in front of the most precious person in his whole life, and he called his name.
Alex rolled his eyes again. But when he looked back down, there was a secret smile tugging at his lips.
——————————————
5. Couple’s therapy
“You’ve got to be kidding me.” How was this his life, Alex wanted to ask.
To his credit, Michael looked bashful for once. “I’ve been seeing this therapist for four months now. And she said we could use a couple’s therapy, so she gave me this Groupon. I thought it’d be great for us.”
Alex stared. “You do know we’re not actually a couple, right?”
Michael looked a bit hurt by that, but he recovered quickly, “We kinda are, though. We both haven’t seen any other people for about half a year now. We spend almost all of our free time together. We touch each other constantly. We talk about everything and anything. Everyone assumes we’re at least hooking up, some think we already eloped!”
“Friends also do that kind of things together. And other people’s opinions really don’t bother me”, Alex didn’t look at him while saying this, so there was still hope right?
At this point, any hope was worth fighting for.
“Yeah, except friends aren’t normally in love with each other.” He said, looking right into Alex’s eyes, daring him to deny it.
Alex hesitated, and resigned. “When is it?”
—————————————
Dr Brown already knew so much about him it was a little unsettling.
“Have you talked anything other than me during your sessions?” Alex couldn’t help to ask.
“Of course!” Michael sounded offended. Meanwhile Dr Brown said, calmly, “Very little.”
Michael threw a betrayed glare at her, but she just smiled.
“So, what do you want to know?” Alex was always direct, “fair warning though. I refuse to talk about my childhood, my parents, my family, my job, my gay struggles, or anything from my past, including my past with Michael.”
“That’s OK”, Dr Brown still smiled, not bothered at all. “I only have one question for you.”
“What’s that?”
“You walked in, already in combat mode, because you treat any foreign environment as a threat, not to mention this foreign environment might force you to open up which you only do when you are around a certain and small group of people. But then Michael walked in too, and your stance changed. You were still in combat mode, but you also put yourself in a protective position, slightly in front of him. Meanwhile, you relaxed noticeably as if you trusted him with all you’ve got. When you sat down, you leaned to him unconsciously, and every time he spoke or touched you, you were calmed and grounded.”
Alex’s voice was raw when he spoke. “That was not a question.”
“So my question is”, she continued, “why do you still deny it, when you’re clearly in love with each other and already in a steady relationship?”
Alex didn’t have an answer for that. He got up and left.
————————————
+1 “How is your headache”
He’d been avoiding Michael for three days now. He was miserable in all of the days.
He was debating whether he should quit being a coward and finally get what he wanted when there was a knock on his door.
He was not even a little surprised that it was Michael.
He was surprised by the flower though.
“What is this?”
Michael held out the flower, eyes pleading. “Wanna take you out for a date.”
“I haven’t slept well these past days, my head kinda hurts, going out is not something I want to do now,” Alex said, and rushed to say the next bit because Michael looked devastated, “But we could stay in, order some take out, and watch Star Wars together?”
Michael relaxed a fraction. “You mean rewatch Star Wars.”
“Yeah, well, I have this habit of falling in love with something and never managing to fall out of it, don’t I?”
Michael smiled, a little teary. “Guess we have that in common.”
——————————————
They ate, they talked, they watched Star Wars.
Then Michael was crowding Alex into the back of the couch, and asked tentatively: “how is your headache, honey?”
To that, Alex replied with a kiss.
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What I Would Add/Change About: Dead or Alive 6
Hello internet! As you probably know, I love video games and I would talk about my feelings for the ones I’ve played for hours. Unfortunately, I don’t pay too much attention to the various gameplay and added content mechanics, so I don’t feel as though I’m qualified to give full-on reviews; my focus is usually on the story and characters, but I am learning to keep a more open eye. So, I’ve decided to start this series! On the anniversary of a game I’ve played’s release, I will talk about what I think a game could have included to improve certain elements or what I think they should have just changed all together about something in it. I will make sure to include what I liked about it as well to keep these from getting too negative.
This is all just my own personal opinion and if you disagree with me, that’s perfectly okay! If you’d like to talk about a point I made, please let me know, but please try to respect my opinion as I respect yours.
Fair warning, I won’t talk about online stuff. I’m not an online gamer, that’s just not me.
Well, with out further ado, let’s get started!
Today is March 1st. Two years ago in 2019, Dead or Alive 6 was released. Bet you guys didn’t know I was fan, did you?
Yes. Yes I am. And there is one thing I love more than that entire series all together.
Kasumi.
I love that woman.
I have yet to see any other woman that I would even consider loving as much as her.
Amazing main, best girl, gripping protagonist, top-tier waifu.
But back to the subject!
Almost seven years since Dead or Alive 5 was released and left it’s audience wanting more, today we ask: Did it live up to seven years of expectations?
For me...
YES!
...Mostly.
I had a real fun time playing when I could (I didn’t have constant access to the console I played it on, don’t ask) but even with how polished the series has gotten, there were a few things that left a sour taste in my mouth.
Let’s go over them, shall we?
SPOILERS AHEAD!
To keep a positive spin on this criticism, I’m going to talk first about all the things I absolutely LOVED about the game:
IT’S. STUNNING. The graphics look amazing, and the slow-motion and visible injuries along with DOA5′s sweat and dirt gives the fights such a weight, it’s brutally gorgeous and I love that video games have reached that level of detail.
Voice acting is good, and I’d have to give best performance to Karen Strassman’s Helena just for her after fight in Kokoro’s story mode because. My gosh. The way she begs Kokoro not to leave her is just heartbreaking, and to do all that while doing an accent is just amazing.
Funniest part of the game was definitely when Zack told Tina she couldn’t be governor. I love how he just shot her down in a whole series of her dad failing to drag her away from her wild dreams through fighting, Zack accomplishes it just by reminding her how the law works.
Kasumi is safe! ...Apart from all the evil clones sent after her. But Ayane is finally leaving her alone!
Helena in the ending. My gosh, the way she just shuts NiCO down and calls her out on failing to move on healthily is a good message about properly dealing with grief and really shows how much she’s grown in the series from the vengeance seeker she started as.
I genuinely liked the addition of Marie Rose. She had a cool design and her character was really charming. The team could easily have made her super annoying, but she was pretty solid, and I appreciate that.
Kokoro’s dress with the beret. It’s just too cute!
I still love kicking opponents off the stage.
Still glad the series hasn’t decided to sink into hyperrealism.
COLORS! ...Those are dying in video games. :(
The story for the most part is interesting and every character gets to shine in their own special way.
Diego was really cool, I always love the addition of an untrained street fighter keeping up with these professional martial artists, it really goes to show that in a fight anything can happen.
I really loved watching Tina and Bass become a tag team, aww! Tina does love her daddy!
The costumes, as always, are awesome.
Vibrant backgrounds, as expected.
The fact that it happened! I was worried I’d never see my sweet Kasumi again!
Alright! Now that we got all the things I unquestionably loved about the game down, here are some things I feel the game was missing.
ADD:
MORE KASUMI! If she’s your heroine, give her more screen time! (What do you mean I’m biased?!)
Have some more time with Kasumi, Ayane and Hayate, show just how conflicted they are by their tragic circumstances when they have to work together when they all know that they will never be able to go back home together. That ending scene was bittersweet, but I feel like they could have done more.
Bring Bayman into the alliance? I mean, he does want revenge on Phase 4. I get that he kinda works with them, I just think they could use him more.
Have Kasumi have a fight with the main Phase 4? I think it’d be interesting to have this clone weapon, who hates that she hurts people, face off against the original who’s now accepted the brutality of the world and will show no mercy to those who stand in her way. I feel like it’d give Kasumi some introspection and see just how much she’s changed; in a way, Phase 4 is a lot like how Kasumi started: she didn’t want to hurt anyone and make enemies, but she couldn’t do anything about it. The difference is Kasumi became the way she is because of her own choice and beliefs while Phase 4 literally can’t stop herself.
Have Lisa explain herself, geez! What is up with this woman?! What are her goals exactly?! Wait...how is she still alive?! Woman straight up had a building fall on her! Why are we just letting her walk away?! LISA!! GET BACK HERE!! WHAT’S YOUR DEAL WOMAN?!!!
So...I guess we still don’t get to beat the crap out of Donovan? Sigh...guess they’re saving that for 7. Hopefully.
And that’s all I think they could have added. And now, here’s everything I think they should have thought about twice.
CHANGE:
Really? You’re just going to bring Raidou back for the final boss? Really? Why not use prime Phase 4, that would have been interesting, a final boss who doesn’t WANT to be the final boss? Come on DOA, you’re better than this! You had seven years to make a final boss! If you couldn’t think of one, just go DOA2 and pull something random out! There’s even another tengu you could have used! Who even remembered Raidou at that point?!
LESS. HONOKA. My gosh, she’s annoying! I’m sorry, I’m sure she has fans, but she just irritated me! Not only was she shoehorned into the plot, but she’s also a total Mary Sue! And that voice, AAAAGGGGHHHH! This is not a knock on Kira Buckland, she’s cool and great at her job, but AAAGGGHHHH! With so many three-dimensional and interesting characters, she just falls flat (metaphorically, of course).
Was Nyotengu actually necessary? I get that the tournament itself is just a distraction now, but she honestly bored me.
Why does Helena’s mother need to come back to life? Seriously, what did M.I.S.T. see in reviving one of the mistresses/mothers of their rival? Is this supposed to like torture Helena or something? This was just unnecessary, there was no reason for this. Sorry Maria.
Oh, so Rig’s mind controlled now? Would have been great if they had foreshadowed that in 5. You know, so it wouldn’t have come out of nowhere and helped explain his whole 180 when he was introduced!
Does Jann Lee really need another rival? Just focus on Lei Fang, she’s awesome!
Bit more meta, but did Rig and Christie really need new voice actors? The new ones are fine, but it just seemed unnecessary.
I’m really mixed about how story mode is laid out in modern DOA. On the one hand, putting everyone’s stories in one playthrough really makes it hard to really get attached to one, which I think is a very important aspect of fighting games. On the other, doing it in this style really helps keep the general plot coherent and easier to follow. I think a good way to handle this would be to make different story modes; a campaign to follow the whole vs. Donovan storyline and a different one that has each character’s individual story outside of the main plot.
Alternatively, divide the story between the tournament and the fight against Donovan; ‘cause I don’t think the Mugen Tenshin clan and their allies are going to be in any tournaments anytime soon.
BRING BACK UNLOCKABLE OUTFITS! Outfits may be understandable for DLC, but it’s just so much easier to unlock them all! I’m not made of money!
Even with all these negatives, I still had a great time playing! It was great to see the cast I loved so much (with one in particular) come back and beat the crap out of each other and I can’t wait for the next one!
...In five years.
#Rambling#Dead or Alive#DOA#Dead or Alive 6#What I Would Add/Change About...#New series#Criticism#Praise#My Silly Personal Opinion
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Intermission (AjinWeek2020/1)
Day 1: Favourite Character (Shimomura Izumi)
Note: Truthfully I felt bad choosing, as I have four favourite characters in Ajin (Kei, Kou, Izumi and Tosaki.) This OS focuses on Izumi however, she deserves light to shine. Enjoy! :)
…….
Career counseling goes a little like this.
“What would you like to do after school, Miss Tainaka? Where do you see yourself in a few years?”
“I don’t know.” Yoko pauses.
“Your grades are fine, although if you applied yourself more I’m sure you could produce even better scores. Looking at attendance-“
She drowns out the voice. She doesn’t even know if she’ll still be alive by then.
….
It’s cold and filthy. Everyone she meets is a stranger at best. She mistrusts, but she thinks it’s essential for survival. Locking her door. Taking up offers that guarantee freedom despite repulsing her inside out. There’s a price to pay for everything in life.
“Be wary, Yoko.” Her mother used to say, “Not everyone is your friend.”
She misses her. Sometimes, in the quiet hours of the morning, she imagines her voice.
She doesn’t cry.
….
Death is blinking machines and hospital sheets. Death is white curtains and the pungent smell of antiseptic. Death is talking to a figure by her bedside that knows her name and plays her a recording of her mother.
She’s heard about the famous last moments one experiences. The movie-reel flashbacks. A wish for forgiveness. Inner peace.
Instead, all she can think about, as she drifts off, warm and letting loose, is how futile her endeavors proved to be.
She tried hard to vanish.
Now she’ll die with an identity, after all.
….
Yoko resets and Yoko becomes Izumi. Izumi takes on her father’s last name, and ironically, that’s as close to her heritage as she ever got.
Shimomura Izumi has a one-bedroom apartment in Ueno and a work contract with the Ministry of Health, Labor and Welfare. Shimomura Izumi has an immortal lifespan and a boss that holds her secret leverage against her. In theory.
In practice he buys her her first set of office clothes and essentials, and pays her a decent wage. She’s probably setting the bar low, she thinks. Not that she has much to compare too.
In practice they spend long hours together in what is almost companiable silence. A job that seems bleak and ordinary on the outside, and probably would be, if not for the horrendous documents she has to look at.
“Give that to me.” he says one evening, pulling a large, nausea-inducing stack of “Classified-Governmental” files from her desk. “I’m out of work, anyway.”
That’s a lie, and she knows it. But she’s not one to turn down a good offer.
“You may leave for today.”
….
They capture Nagai Kei. Twice. The first time, Izumi won’t speak about.
The second time, it’s not only him, but also Nakano Kou, another Ajin.
The second time, they’re already one foot in jail, hiding out in an old military building in the woods.
“You should move in here.” says Tosaki, nonchalantly, turning away from the window where he’s observing the daily training rounds much to Nagai’s chagrin, “It would be more efficient.”
“Perhaps.” Izumi says, retaining a neutral expression. She is better off keeping out of attachments.
A few days later, she moves her spare belongings. She likes the familiarity and quiet of her apartment. But she prefers not being alone.
…..
Days become a routine. They don’t end until past midnight.
There’s a new, worn-out couch in their pseudo-livingroom, courtesy of Hirasawa and Manabe and a location they won’t disclose.
Izumi lies down, sighing in bliss at the brief respite. Then, she picks up her accounting reports that glare at her accusingly from the side table.
“You’re going to fall asleep like this.” Tosaki objects when he comes in later, taking a seat at a table and throwing throwing her an amused glance.
“My rhythm works well into the night. There’s no reason for concern.” Izumi replies, writing small notes in the margins before angling for her calculator.
Tosaki scoffs, but bites back further comments.
When Izumi next comes to, the clock on the wall shows 4 am.
There is a pillow under her head and a light blanket thrown across her. Her documents have been neatly stacked on the nearest table.
She sighs, and, fighting the urge to roll over and sleep until morning, she heads to her bedroom, taking her work with her.
She finishes an hour later. Three hours later, she wakes up and makes Tosaki a cup of coffee he didn’t ask for.
…….
Ogura is the only one who partakes in her smoking habit. They’re outside the hideout, sitting on a bench. Despite the time of night, it’s still unbelievably warm. Izumi slips out of her sandals and touches the grass with bare feet. A bunch of cicadas scream in the background.
“Wonder what he’ll be up to if he ever grows tired of burning down the world.” She says, sighing and stares out into the pitch-black night infront of them. They’re arrived full-circle at one of their favourite topics.
“Satou’ll never get bored.” Ogura objects, squashing his cigarette against the wall before lighting a new one reflexively.
“He’s a gamer, isn’t he? And he’s already streaming on his website. He’ll want to stay hip and go with the crowd. Not gonna be long until he opens a Youtube gaming channel.”
Izumi stares at him, incredulously.
“He would. It’s all the rage in the States. He’d pick a fancy name, too. Like…killer-grandpa-606”
“Stop it.” Izumi says, choking on her next drag.
“Murderous-maniac-xoxo.”
“Killers-with-Hats.”
“That’s a good one.”
Her knowledge of pop-culture has steadily improved, mostly due to Nakano’s influence, but also Nagai’s- although she would never put him on the spot like that.
…………..
They’re not supposed to use the internet, as not to leave traces on websites, and they’re most certainly not supposed to have social media profiles. Izumi senses a loosing battle far into the first few weeks. Does she have evidence? No, she would tell Tosaki-san blankly. She only has a hint.
(She personally logs Nakano out of his youtube account on multiple occasions.)
Instead, she calculates and sends emails with attachments, and installs a VPN on every single device she can get her hands on. That’s more than she can do.
It’s more than she knew how to do, weeks prior. Adapt, overcome.
………….
The name is a fraud. There’s no Yukimura Hifumi – none, that she knows of, at least. But she’ll need a fake I.D. one day. They all will. It’s a little like a vacation they can’t take, she thinks, surveying country maps for places to flee to. “I have an aunt in Kyoto.” she says, one evening.
“And she can be considered trustworthy?”
“She has dementia.” Izumi says. And a house that reminds her of vacations spend with her mother. And a backyard where the neighbours’ cats frequent.
“We’ll consider it.”
….
Somedays, she finds it hard to stand up. Somedays, she finds it easy.
On every single day, she pushes herself regardless.
“Good morning, Kuro-chan.” she says, like every morning, and opens the window.
She’ll make this identity her own.
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session 9 notes
Tea time as in the oneshot period session u do
Adam is rolling at disadvantage medicine check
Sylvia is playing as Sarah (16)
Marguerite is Snapette (14)
Has not had it before
Lillian is Samantha (15?? 14???)
Has had it before
Can provide inspiration
Sarah picks room c painted purple and dripping stuff from the ceiling
Takes snapette and samantha with her, do it
Adam casts message
"are you guys ok?"
Snapette is a little freaked out bc hasn't had it yet
"I don't knowww"
Samantha says don't worry it's just a routine procedure "she'll be ok don't worry about it"
6
Adam casts shatter at the wall
3d4 damage from middle school girls roll to hit above an 6
Adam has to roll wisdom saving throw at 15
At disadvantage (on next attack)
ROLL INITIATIVE
Adam: 12
Sarah: 5
Snapette: 19
Samantha: 19
Samantha
Snapette
Adam
Sarah
Samantha's turn
2 for persuasion
Snapette
5
Adam casts sleep
Snapette is asleep
Sarah
4 for persuasion
Samantha
6 for persuasion
Adam
Hideous laughters samantha but on the ground laughing
Sarah
Ok next one as in real one ig
"lillian has a gaming setup confirmed"
"lillian is a hardcore gamer"
Ok actually
Last session we were following a lead, we took a rest but now we wanna go to the cemetery
We're gonna go get that rock
"Does the rat have a bed ??"
It's a cemetery but also a park
It's still foggy
We're gonna walk until we come across a taxi ig
Aerana is leading in front, adam towards middle, cel towards back
Asyna and theo don't care
Not fog it's rain
Don't see too many ppl out but as we leave the dock ward we see ppl trying to find cover
Pass through the dock ward unhindered
Eventually we flag down a carriage
V old tiefling man w an eyepatch and a beard coming down in two forks but w one shorter than the other
3c each
"take these coppers . Old version of me"
"eh . What r u doing up this time of night"
"oh we're just gonna go pay our respects to the graveyard"
"we have many graveyards which one r u going to"
"just u know the general - the city of the dead"
"ah headed back there again, eh?"
"again?"
"what do you mean by again?"
"my eye must've been deceiving me I could've sworn I spoke to u the other day"
Adam is not allowed to roll perception???????
"oh no no sir I haven't met u before in my life"
His depth perception is gone
He was doing typical rounds and ran into young man who needed ferry into city of the dead
"there's a lot of tieflings in the city . We all look the same"
No one else is on the carriage
It's late afternoon-ish here
Just dark bc cloud cover it's v rainy
Fast travel ?
He tries some conversation but normal guy
Arrive at a thing with a cage castle thing that's locked up
Metal grate thing in front of the door??? PORTCULLIS
It's so rainy
Looking beyond it there's a lot of carefully manicured lawns
It's locked
A wench looks pulled
If adam were stronger he could push it open
Cel rolls perception for guards
10
Can see light or smth passing through ?? Smth in the place
Kinda bobs a little that "might suggest a lantern"
We can't see it
Adam casts mage hand to try and open the wedge from the other side
There's an actual lock
Lillian rolls a 6
Everyone is confused I am also confused
Everyone is low rolling; cel rolls 8
"how climbable does the wall look"
23 aerana unlocks the door
You're trying to figure it out in the rain
Adam is mage handing the inside part
20
Could not put the lock back on but close the gate
Adam is putting it in george the bush
"I'll be so happy to take this lock off your hands"
It's an awakened bush
"we'll come back to you george bush"
Passing through, it's p creepy
We follow her instructions
Small lake w a small bridge
Asyna has 14 passive perception
This is a p sizable area
she hears out of sync footsteps
Someone stepping when we aren't
Someone walking with us behind us
Asyna rolls perception check disadvantage
a 2
Asyna pretends she looks back to talk to someone behind her
Looks over shoulder, still walking w everyone
Doesn't see anything
The rain and the dark r making it hard for us
Adam is leading
"hey adam . There's someone maybe following us"
Adam's already terrified and now he's peeing
He has actually peed
Was already kinda freaked out by the bus driver
Adam stops leading
Turns to asyna "y ou wot"
"what ? Keep walking let's keep walking"
"but you said"
"nononono"
Asyna perception at disadvantage
11
Adam stops
We've all stopped
As adam is talking to asyna asyna hears the footsteps where we've stopped walking and then they stopped
Cel roll 6
Aerana rolls 20
U whip ur head back to see
U hear ??? "what languages do you guys speak"
U hear what sounds like someone cursing u can't tell what it is
U tell the group
Asyna just says "hey"
Oh we can hold an attack
Let's hold an attack
Adam is holding his urine
"adam's a heavy drinker . You guys don't know that about him" - jacob, 2020
The hey is not answered
Hear a little more squelching
Sounds from the right, 7 perception check
Hard to tell, maybe
Adam does not have detect magic
Bruh dom's gonna kill us right now
On our right we hear stomping in the mud
4 short hooded figures randomly appear
Some kind of weapons they're holding w longer grayish beards and the start rushing to us to attack
I literally rolled a nat1
17 for adam
7 for theo
6 for asyna
Nat1 for cel
Nat1 for aerana
Adam is first
They look like dwarves but they're hooded w v white beards
Four of them in melee w us
All will make charisma saving throw
They don't look like zents or guards
Look like kind of thugs
Fail, nat20, nat20, fail
Whenever the failed ones make an attack roll, -1d4
Uses cutting words on one of the passed one, on next roll needs to -1d6
Two of them rush over after adam does and suddenly it looks like they start to straighten up in posture but they just grow in size
For better or worse they've become larger like the dweargar
They're dweargar
One of each of the attacked ones ig
A third grows in size
Theo's turn
Tries to shoot small one
"kill the baby dwarf"
Rolls an 8 to hit, misses
Asyna's turn
"It would just be a soggy ape"
We're trying to figure out which animal asyna should turn into
She's gonna turn into a crocodile bc one time jones put a crocodile out
We're going to the zoo after this session
There are dippin dots at the zoo
There are not dippin dots at the zoo?
The ice elemental could make a version of dippin dots
Dom gets frozen lemonade at zoos
There are not dippin dots at the zoo but in the summer they have the equivalent of shaved ice
Now asyna's gonna attack
18 to hit
7 damage
Bite attack ? Grappled ? Dc12 saving throw ? No dc12 to escape
He's stuck in the jaws
Who's stuck in the jaws ? The big one one of the big ones the bained one
Oh wait how big is the crocodile
Large
It works
Small one becomes large now all four are large
Cel's turn
Takes the one that just turned big
Casts hunters mark and then hits with sword
1d6 of damage, 2 from hunters mark added
15 to hit with bow, 14 damage
Aerana's turn
11 damage
Big one that adam didn't hit
U poke a lil hole
He's wearing chain armor and u shear through it a little
Adam
Casts vicious mockery on the one you just hit
He will take 3 damage "the only reason you got big physically is because you're compensating"
And disadvantage on next physical attack
He's next
Ah he's gonna attack u
He misses
Other one goes
The big bained one
Marguerite took the small bained one
Nat1 lmao
Tries to swing at adam and doesn't hit
Grappled man gonna try to escape, is large so does he escape ? Yes he escapes
Theo's turn
Theo will hit the one that just tried to escape w bow
14 to hit, does it
Deals 5 damage
The one u n adam hit is a little worse for wear along w the last one to turn big boi
Theo can add sneak attack bc asyna is within melee range
Adds 8 damage for total 13 damage
Now he's also not looking great
Theo abandons bow to sneak attack w sword
Asyna's turn
18 to hit
6 damage
Same guy theo got
"how do you want to do this?"
Chomps him in half
He tastes salty
Ok so in total like 26 damage to take out ?
Upon seeing the crocodile the other one is gonna fight asyna
Despite -1d6 to hit, has advantage bc larger size and never mind ?
12 armor class, he hits
6 damage
He smashes snout in "it hurts . But ur fine"
Cel's turn
It is the one with hunters mark
Uses bow
23 to hit, 11 damage
Looks like he's on his last legs
Aerana deals 14 damage
"how do you want to do this"
Cut off the legs then he slides off his own legs and collapses
Bleeding out as he kicks the bucket
Adam
"how do you want to do this"
1 health lmao
"what I roll will tell me the level of roast that kills him"
"your mother was a badger mole and your father was a worm"
He hyperventilates, asphyxiates, then dies
Bruh next time u should pull a criminal minds death smh
He rolls a 3 and doesn't hit anyone
Theo's turn
Makes an athletics check to climb onto him?
I want a burrito
I'm gonna make a burrito after we play so I can start s14
Gonna try to intimidate
" we just killed all of your friends but we'd be willing to keep you alive if you answered some questions for us "
"that is the most polite intimidation I've ever heard" dom, 2020
Rolls with advantage
8 lmao
He looks scared but it didn't work
"is theo like a mormon or something???" jacob, 2020
"dnd but it's mormons"
Asyna's turn
Rolls a 2, snaps and it doesn't work
Cel's turn
Pulls out sword to intimidate
"last chance fucker or we kill you"
17
Bc we're in melee he drops his weapon which did not grow in size with him
Adam is gonna change his shorts
It looks like he's wearing a skort
You take his war hammer
Time to interrogate
Cel is pulling him down???? He's medium size and cel is filled with rage
Eye contact ???? Or ok athletics check
14 athletics check it works gets him down to eye level
"who sent you?"
Doesn't answer
Asks in undercommon
"I was sent by noska"
"noska's with me at the guild"
It is the xanathar guild
"why?"
"we figured you five would have the stone"
Adam comes back
"we do have the stone in fact"
Deception check
19
Intimidation and deception are specific ways of persuading
19 deceives
"we already had it"
He looks at adam and says "that so? Well uh then you have it on you now?"
"uh no . Check the bottom of the ocean ."
His eyes widen
"so why don't you go tell your xants"
"you . You didn't ."
"oh . We did."
He's not used to communicating through an interpreter
Says smth along the lines of "you idiot there's half a million dragons in there"
Now he's just yelling at us
Cel whips out sword and offers to behead him against the
We could cut out his tongue and opposable thumbs
And then let him go as a sign to the xants
Carve a message into his chest
"who else are you hunting for"
"nobody right now . I guess ,, well, no .. No, not really - mostly just the rock"
"well it's gone . See rock see stone at the see shell at the see shore"
"here's the thing buddy boy we know you're looking for it and we don't like you"
"so you can skedaddle"
"when did adam get so cocky?"
"right after he learned vicious mockery"
Adam spanks him
He shrunk to a medium size
Or maybe adam didn't spank him
Tl;dr he's not gonna snitch and doesn't give us a name
"I still wanna know your name, fucker"
It's gorrick
Sylvia would've called him ocean
"if you know a crow person named bingbong-" "that's not his real name" "-if you know a kenku whose name is a gong sound, can you tell us where he is?" "well there's lots of different kenku but I don’t' know they all look kind of scruffy and they all wear cloaks so I can't tell" he doesn't know
"he reluctantly gives you his pants" dom, 2020
"but is he packing tho" marianne, 2020
"roll for perception at disadvantage" "16"
"from what you can tell… this guy can taste enlarge/reduce on himself, so yeah" dom says, begrudgingly, 2020
For the record . I was joking . But he made me roll
"is that dead one packing shmeat" "NO, HE IS N O T" jacob and dom, 2020
"you idiots are dead xants r gonna come and make your lives hell"
We see lantern lights just bobbing around in the darkness
Arrive at one of the wealthier areas w big pillared, raised pedestals w coffins n statues
Eventually make it to a small covered stone building not too much larger than a shed
One of the things has been pushed open
Smashed lock on the ground
Adam thaumaturgies and walks in
Adam makes the light blue
10 feet in there's a 10ft open chamber; off to left and right are two different stone coffins that have been covered up; don't depict any particular person but some writing on it
Further in two raised sections with set of stairs leading into darkness between them
Cel rolls investigation check to see if someone was there
Rolls 21, somewhat dusty inside and can see some footprints
2 pairs that look human-sized
Writing on coffins just have names of garloth family with age and short passage
The footprints look like they go both in and out
Honestly ? Proud of my question asking if the footprints are going in the same direction . Me one year ago would not have thought
Adam goes deeper into the darkness
Going down it's warmer, pathway abt 10 feet wide
More coffins; one to right one to left
Contents have been ransacked
Tops have been broken (wood)
Some bones have been removed
Cel rolls 21 to see if they were buried w anything
Passage extends 50 feet down
All coffins here have been ransacked
Two more coffins have also been ransacked
60 feet down adam can see a side passage
Bc of the light adam can see smth sparkling in the dust
Door set into the wall
Adam picks it up
Looks like a key
Adam tries it for the locked door
Adam runs 19 investigation but it doesn't appear to be trapped
Looks like this door has scratches like long gouges
Key adam found does not fit
Cel picks it
More ornate coffin inside, untouched
Cel rolls for investigation, 10
Unsure abt traps
More dusty in here, some dirt falling from ceiling
Adam looking for rat-sized entrances
Investigation check
11, can't see
Other coffin made to look like a person, last name garloth
Cel opens the coffin
Strength check w advantage
Nat20
Wedges crowbar under stone, it slides off and hits the ground, kicking up some dust
Inside is a dead person
Cel investigates for stone
13, it's just a dead man
Rings just look fancy
Based on our info
The stone is p sizable
Adam puts all the rings on at once and as he tugs the rings off the skeleton the head rolls and falls to look at adam
"I'm gonna cover the face and keep tugging - does it come off?"
"the finger comes off"
Naya's gonna scry w the key
"are you still a crocodile?"
"oh ok I guess I'll revert then"
Naya hops away
Will do investigation checks for rest of tomb
Adam is licking the floor, rolls 13
Adam gathers the door was not opened before we came in
Hard to tell w the footprints now that we've come in
Someone did come in tho before us
Cel is investigating and adam is giving inspiration
"are you doing bardic inspiration then?"
"yeah"
"do I get a song?"
"there once was a halfling named cel she was searching for bodies in a cell but there was one trap everyone did a laugh(?) and down the hole she fell"
"you've been inspired to avoid all danger"
Four were unopened Ig
11 it doesn't open ?
Nat20 for second coffin
Dead person inside
Investigates for stone, 8
Doesn't see anything
There's an entrance the door at the front of the mausoleum that a rat could fit through
No rat-sized holes in the coffins
Only lead is the key
Naya looks like she's leaving so we're gonna follow
Eventually led to another entrance/exit of the cemetery in a different direction
Still raining but not quite as heavily as before
Getting closer to midnight
Naya starts leading us towards trades ward
Pause point?
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Top 10 Horror Movie Guilty Pleasures:
In no particular order.
1) Stephen King’s Sleepwalkers (1992) - Okay so maybe the graphics don’t quite hold up nowadays, but they’re still the perfect amount of cheesiness. Sleepwalkers follows the mother-son duo Mary and Charles Brady, who are the aforementioned Sleepwalkers, an ancient species who prey on virginal females, needing to consume their life force. There’s a lot of weird sexual energy between the two and there is incest abound. Charles sets his sights on Tanya, one of his classmates, and while he does charm her, he doesn’t count on her being a formidable foe to the two of them. If you love cats, I’d highly recommend this film, seeing as how the Sleepwalkers find themselves enemies in the furry little creatures. It’s also slammed full of fun cameos, including King himself, amongst others like: Tobe Hooper, Clive Barker, Mark Hamill, and more.
2) Thirteen Ghosts AKA Thir13en Ghosts (2001)- How do you improve upon the gimmicky style of horror icon William Castle? Easy answer, you don’t. But that doesn’t mean that the remake to Castle’s 13 Ghosts (1960) is bad by any means. It’s one of my guiltiest pleasures. After a house fire takes the life of his wife, Arthur and his children are told by his late-uncle’s lawyer that he has inherited a beautiful house. The only problem? The house actually contains multiple spirits, spirits who, more often than not, are out for blood. Thirteen Ghosts is a fun reimagining, it even takes Castle’s original gimmick of Illusion-O (glasses that the audience could use, if they were brave enough to want to view the ghosts) and gives the glasses to the characters themselves, which honestly, is probably even more frightening for those poor souls. It’s the perfect amount of early 2000′s cheese and honestly, any movie starring Matthew Lillard is worth a view from me.
3&4) The Mummy & The Mummy Returns (1999 & 2001) - While 1999’s The Mummy is technically a remake/reboot of 1932’s The Mummy, it is more of an action film, rather than the horror that is the 1932 version. There are many purists who insist that the original is the very best, but I’m here to just say, I absolutely love and cherish the ‘99 version and its sequel The Mummy Returns. The films follow Rick, Evelyn, Jonathan and an assortment of other characters as they accidentally resurrect ancient evils that they should’ve known better about. There are bits of horrific imagery scattered throughout the films and that’s enough for me to count them amongst some of my favorite horror films. Even with those though, they are light-hearted films with such interesting subject matter.
5) Van Helsing (2004) - No one will claim Van Helsing is a masterpiece, and they aren’t wrong. But the movie is wonderful for what it is: an action-packed love letter to the horror monsters of our past. It’s no wonder that this movie holds a special place in my heart, it was directed by Stephen Sommers, the same man who directed both The Mummy and The Mummy Returns. It stars Hugh Jackman as the titular character, Abraham Van Helsing, as he hunts down Dracula. Along the way, Van Helsing comes across Mr. Hyde, Frankenstein’s Monster, and even a werewolf. The story is full of love for the characters and the Gothic aesthetic and, in my opinion, gives the monsters the respect they deserve. It is a must-watch for anyone who loves the monsters who came before us.
6) Urban Legends: Bloody Mary (2005) - Fun fact! Urban Legends: Bloody Mary was directed by Mary Lambert. Who’s Mary Lambert, you may ask? Only the director behind one of my favorite Stephen King adaptations, Pet Semetary (1989)! While this film does not have as much of a following, it still does right by me. The movie follows Sam and her brother David as they try to solve the mystery of Mary Banner, while the children of those responsible for Banner’s untimely death are killed off one-by-one. Being the third movie in the Urban Legend film series, this movie forgoes the slasher premise of the first two films, instead opting to go full supernatural. Some of the deaths have been used before in other films, but it doesn’t make them less effective, i.e; burning to death in a tanning bed will ALWAYS be terrifying. I also absolutely love the song heard throughout each death, “I Will Always Be There,’ performed to perfection by Niki Harris. It completely embodies the time period in which Mary’s innocence and life was lost, and it’s so bone-chillingly amazing.
7) 5ive Girls (2006) - 5ive Girls is a lesser known supernatural horror film helming from Canada. The only actor in it that is particularly well known is Ron Perlman. For that to be the case honestly sucks, because the acting is so criminally underrated in this film. 5ive Girls takes place at an all-girls Catholic school and follows five different girls along as they all discover they are powered and then immediately begin being possessed. There’s even a sweet romance that buds between two of the girls, Mara and Alex, but seeing as this is a horror movie, long-lasting love is never a guarantee. The film is a neat hidden gem and deserves more praise for the acting of all the young women, who nailed all of their characters wholly.
8) Stay Alive (2006) - A video game centered movie where if you die in the game, you die in real life? Sign me up. A movie loosely based upon one of the most prolific female serial killers ever known in history? Sign me up even more! Stay Alive never got the credit it deserved and to a degree that’s understandable; for a horror movie based around a group of gamers playing a game, none of them truly feel like they realistically game. The concept is there though and its villain is none other than the Blood Countess herself, Elizabeth Bathory, though her backstory was changed for the film. Bathory in real life was a Countess who was thought to have murdered up to 650 young girls to use their blood as a way of staying young, the movie sets her as a headmistress who murdered 30+ of her students for their youth. The change does not make much sense, but whatever works for the screenwriters works for me, because I still enjoy this movie so much. Sophia Bush’s, October, is a standout character in particular; she’s a take-no-crap type of woman who fights until her bitter end and she provides the rest of the characters with the keys in which to survive Bathory’s depraved game.
9) Final Destination 3 (2006) - The Final Destination series had a good run, mostly producing great films. One stands above the rest though, and that is Final Destination 3. The plot follows the same layout as the rest of the films, hot young people cheating death and then immediately learning the hard way that death doesn’t allow that sort of nonsense. FD 3 centers around Mary Elizabeth Winstead’s character, Wendy, having the standard vision of a deadly accident, this one being a rollercoaster flying off of its tracks. Winstead portrays Wendy as a somewhat prissy character, but honestly, the girl is smart and does stave off death for quite a while. The DVD for the film also offers one of the coolest bonus features: Choose Your Fate, which allows the viewer to help save lives and in some cases, end the film almost as soon as it starts, allowing the main characters to survive unscathed, though their fates later on aren’t exactly desirable either.
10) Beyond the Gates (2016) - An innovative and more recent horror film staring horror icon Barbara Crampton? Why isn’t this getting all of the praise it deserves? The film follows two brothers as they are clearing out their father’s video store, seeing as how he has been missing for over half a year. While there, they discover an old interactive VCR game entitled Beyond the Gates and are drawn to playing it. The game is more than it appears though and eventually the brothers find that it is much more than they bargained for. They must then go “beyond the gates” to save their father’s soul and themselves before it is too late. Crampton stars as the games guide, growing more menacing as the film progresses. The film is gorgeous with its retro aesthetic and fun neon colors. You’d be a fool to miss out on this piece.
#horror#stephen kings sleepwalkers#thirteen ghosts#the mummy#the mummy returns#van helsing#urban legends bloody mary#5ive girls#stay alive#final destination 3#beyond the gates#horror guilty pleasures#horror movies#movie buff
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tagged by @meonlyred. time to expose myself as a fake gamer girl. i am too tired to think of other people to tag but if you are reading this and you play video games i would like to know what your answers to these questions are. i am tagging @you.
favorite game from the last 5 years? pillars of eternity 2 & the sims 4. someone please resuscitate the singleplayer story-focused rpg where choices change the course of events and i don’t spend 90% of my game on fetch quests. not everything has to be “open world”. i am so tired.
most nostalgic game? goldeneye. i live for slappers only bighead mode.
game that deserves a sequel? mass effect andromeda. i enjoyed the game and it was a great concept that suffered for behind the scenes bungling and it really deserves a redemption arc in the form of a sequel with adequate time and resources and good direction.
game that deserves a remaster? kotor. but maybe i’m just saying that because that’s the game that hooked me on games (with a little help from @lwsupremacy) and every game i have played since has been a futile attempt to recapture the magic of being trapped on taris for 3 days because i couldn’t figure out that i needed to go to that sith party and steal a uniform and also finding out that i was the villain all along.
favorite game series? kotor & dragon age.
favorite genre? story-focused rpgs or anything with really detailed character customization.
least favorite genre? everything else. i don’t actually like video games i just like combining interactive fiction and dress up.
favorite song from a game? idk man. i really liked mass effect 3′s soundtrack i guess???
favorite character from a game? the player character. i’m a self-centered ho who is not too proud to admit to this.
favorite ship from a game? i’ll always be a slut for shakarian. also i am deep in doc x rea hell. i don’t necessarily ship him with every jedi knight in swtor (he is not for everyone) but i sure as shit do with mine. i’ll
favorite voice actor from a game? they are all magic. i have an especial weaknes for brandon keener as garrus vakarian and claudia black as morrigan, but they are all goddamn magic. also all the voicework in pillars of eternity 2 is especially magic and i’m not just saying that because i’m so weak for the cast of critical role.
favorite cutscene? all of the cutscenes in the citadel dlc for mass effect 3???
favorite boss? does it have to be a final boss? is this question about mechanics or story??? who cares this is my blog i do what i want. the answer is the broodmother from dragon age: origins. that is the creepiest shit that still elicits a visceral reaction from me even now. even just thinking about it.
first console? the first console i ever owned personally was an xbox gifted to me for christmas at age 16. i had asked for an n64 because i was feeling nostalgic and wanted to play goldeneye and chrono trigger and whatever the fuck else i used to play in the brief moments when my brother would allow me to touch his console, but my mom could not find an n64 since they were a decade old at that point so she bought me an xbox and a couple star wars and james bond games instead. i spent my entire christmas break consumed by kotor and that is how i started really playing video games at all. thanks mom!
current console or consoles? fuck consoles. sorry horizon: zero dawn but i am pc only.
console you want? i want my brother to give my n64 back so i can play goldeneye. YOU HAD YOUR OWN N64 SCOTT. WHY DID YOU TAKE MINE???? KEEP TRACK OF YOUR SHIT AND STOP TAKING MINE. IT’S BEEN 8 YEARS AND I’M STILL SALTY YOU LIL BITCH.
place from a game that you’d like to visit? all the places in video games are like mad violent and i am painfully aware that in video game world i would be a useless, expendable npc. much as i’d like to see nar shaddaa or the citadel or tevinter i would like to remain alive, out of prison, and out of slavery more.
place from a game that you’d like to live in? i just remembered stardew valley. i could live there i guess. i wouldn’t say i’d like to but if i have to pick a place from a game.... stardew valley.
ridiculous crossover that would never happen but would be super fun? i want to play a mass effect prequel that is garrus as a citadel cop teaming up with nancy drew in a very weird point and click adventure. what nancy drew is doing there is never explained. why c-sec is working with a 16 year old human girl is also not explained. nothing is explained there is no time for explanations there is a mystery to solve.
book that would make a good game? brandon sanderson’s mistborn series. honestly anything he writes has a fun system of magic with enough definition to translate in an interesting and playable way to a video game mechanic, but i think mistborn would be the most fun. although the color shit from warbreaker would be very visually striking i think.
show/movie that would make a good game? the good place. it could be the weirdest and most fun game. some kind of weird patchwork of minigames that somehow forms a cohesive narrative.
games you want to play? cyberpunk 2077 looks pretty good. i usually only get excited about bioware games or games my friends have already played and told me i would like. i am not that hyped for anthem because i hate multiplayer outside of my circle of three friends who i don’t mind holding back with how awful i am at video gaming. i’m still gonna buy it and play it and i am very open to being pleasantly surprised but i can’t bring myself to be hyped.
have you gotten 100% completion in a game? any game that can be completed that i have actually finished playing, i have completed 100%. no fetch quest too small or too annoying bitch.
have you cried over a game? i cried a whole lot on my third day trapped in the upper levels of taris, unable to figure out how to get down the elevator to the lower city. also other times because of emotional beats in the storyline or whatever. i am a human person with skin and feelings.
what power-up or ability would you want in real life? i really enjoy the direct correlation between effort and achievement and would like to adopt that in my real life. in the sims, when my sim spends 8 hours writing they have a completed novel at the end of it. they put it in the mailbox and then they get royalties for a while. that sounds nice!!!! a specific ability though... i ought to say healing or something actually useful that could help people but if i’m being perfectly honest i wanna force leap. i wanna zoom.
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o98.
Are you currently listening to music? >> Yeah, it’s a Stone Sour song, part of my Spotify Discover Weekly playlist. Which is like 50% nu-metal this week, for some reason. Guess it’s 2003 today.
When was the last time you went swimming? >> I can’t swim, but the last time I was in a body of water was a few years ago, probably.
Have you ever watched a meteor shower? >> I’ve tried, but I’ve never been far enough away from light pollution to properly watch it. Oh, except one time we went to the house of two of Sparrow’s coworkers, which is out in the relative middle of nowhere... but we didn’t really watch the sky as much as we played some board game.
Is there something currently upsetting you? >> No.
The person who last spoke to you in person, what is their name? >> Sparrow.
The person who last texted you, tell me their name? >> Also Sparrow.
Is there something you need to accomplish soon? >> Nothing I can think of right now.
Is it easy to get a job where you live? >> I don’t know, I’m not aware of the state of the job market here.
Does coffee in the morning wake you up? >> I’m sure it would, but I don’t usually drink it.
What/when is your graduating year? >> 2004.
Do you have a designated phobia? >> Not really.
What was your favorite class to take in school? >> I didn’t have one.
Is there a letter of the alphabet you like above all the rest? >> I’m pretty fond of V.
Have you ever had a pixie cut? >> Nope. My hair doesn’t do that kind of thing.
Would you ever consider joining the Navy? >> Absolutely not.
Is your signature legible? >> It would be if I wanted it to be, but I don’t particularly care.
Have you ever smashed your finger between two rocks? >> No.
Do you own a pair of SkullCandy earphones? >> I used to.
What's your opinion on people who put personal info as their statuses? >> I don’t care?
If the person you like/love proposed to you right now, you would say? >> I mean, that already happened last year.
Are you satisified with your current camera? >> I’m fine with a phone camera.
Have you ever watched the miniseries "Band of Brothers"? >> No.
Has someone let you down recently? >> No.
The last person you kissed, have you spoken to them in the last 24 hours? >> I’m guessing that was Can Calah, and yeah, we speak almost constantly in some form or another.
When was the last time you felt ignored? >> I don’t remember.
Have you seen the movie Inception? >> Yeah, several times.
What is the last digit of your phone number? >> 3.
Has someone you didn't even know gone out of their way to be rude to you? >> Sure.
Have you ever dated someone with red hair? >> Not naturally red.
Is there a scar on your body that you can relate to a specific memory? >> Yeah, there are a few like that.
Does caffeine ever give you the shakes? >> No, it just makes my heart race. Maybe if I drank a whole lot of it at once I’d get the shakes, but I have no desire to find that out, so.
If someone handed you $300 spending money, what would you buy? >> Right now? I don’t know, food, probably. Something else would occur to me too, I’m sure.
Do you have uncontrollable anger? >> No.
Have you yelled at someone recently? >> No.
Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? >> Yes.
The last conversation you had with someone online, was it important? >> Not terribly.
Do you think you could be a good marksman? >> Maybe if I practiced.
Is smoking an immediate turnoff to you? >> No.
Are your toenails currently painted? >> No.
How many pushups can you do, if any? >> Like 8.
Have you ever taken a yoga class? >> I’ve done a couple of classes in different places. Most yoga classes move too quickly for my needs.
Notification emails from Facebook can get annoying, true? >> Yes, which is why I have them turned off.
If given the opportunity, would you legally change your name? >> I’ve done it twice and I’ll be doing it at least one more time before this life is over.
Has religion ever come between you and a friend or family member? >> No.
Do you own any records? >> Yeah, I have 5 of them so far.
What is your academic average? >> ---
Is there a technology brand you prefer? >> For computers I’m pretty fond of Lenovo so far. For a lot of other things I prefer Samsung and Sony.
What was the last song that got stuck in your head? >> Probably that stupid Kongos song.
Have you ever read a book that was over a thousand pages long? >> Yes.
Is your ancestry European? >> Nope.
Is there a foreign country that appeals to you? >> There are many countries that appeal to me.
Do you know the first word you spoke as a child? >> Nope.
Do you know anyone whose eyes seem to change color? >> I don’t know, maybe. I don’t look at people’s eyes, so I wouldn’t know either way.
Have you ever had a friend who told a lot of white lies? >> I don’t know.
Do you have a specific talent you're known for? >> I guess the closest thing to that would be my writing.
Anything upcoming that you're not looking forward to? >> Not anything soon.
Does anyone you know confuse the usage of "to" "too" and "two"? >> Probably, but I don’t care enough to pay attention.
Have you ever been to a ceildh? >> No, but that sounds like a great time.
When was the last time you cried because you were angry? >> I don’t remember.
Do you crack your knuckles or any other part of your body? >> Yeah.
What's your favorite flavor of flavored water, if any? >> I don’t like flavoured water.
Do you like fish and chips? >> Sure, but especially at J Gardella’s.
Who was the last person you purposely avoided? >> I don’t know.
Do you or does anyone you know own an antique vehicle? >> Yeah, my father does.
Has anyone ever called you "cold-hearted"? >> Probably.
Have you ever sat on a bale of hay? >> Yeah. Itchy.
Do you like blueberries? >> I do.
Has anyone ever told you that you were worthless? >> I don’t know, maybe.
The last person you kissed, have you held their hand? >> Yes.
Would you consider yourself to be confident? >> Some level of it, most of the time.
Is someone you know moving away any time soon? >> No.
Is your backyard big or small? >> No backyard.
Are you right or left handed, or ambidexterous? >> Right-handed.
Can you see yourself in a mirror from where you're at? >> No.
If you jumped out the nearest window, would you live? >> Probably, but I’d definitely break something.
Have you ever heard the call of a loon? >> I don’t know.
Is there an animal that scares you? >> Sure, if I was stuck in a room with them or something.
Have you ever touched an elephant? >> No, but I’d love to.
Have you ever been close to being nocturnal? >> I’ve been nocturnal quite often, but I seem to have settled into being diurnal now. Being nocturnal is a pain in the ass.
When you get blood tests, do you feel faint afterwards? >> No.
Do you know what color lipstick goes best with your complexion? >> I look best in plum shades, in my opinion.
Do you think you will have a date for prom? >> I did, and it was the worst.
Your favorite TV show: is it over or still continuing? >> Most of my favourites are off the air.
Have you ever wandered around drunk at night? >> Wandered, no. But I’ve walked around drunk at night, sure.
Do you own anything that's real gold? >> Yeah, my engagement ring.
Are you any good at video games? >> I’m passably good, I’d say. I don’t die as much as I used to, but I do still struggle more than the average gamer at certain things.
Are you afraid of being cheated on? >> No.
Do you know how to play poker? >> I’ve forgotten.
Can you do the hula-hoop? >> Yeah, briefly.
Is your face shape oval, heart shaped or square? >> I’m not sure, really.
Where you live, the emergency number is 911, right? >> Yes.
Have you ever had to call this number? >> Yes.
Have you ever been in a play/musical? >> Yeah, Annie, as an extra.
Do you prefer white boards or chalk boards? >> Chalkboards are nicer to look at, but whiteboards are easier to write on and neater overall.
When was the last time someone asked you to go somewhere? >> I don’t remember.
Have you ever been to an antique car show? >> No.
Do most of your friends have cell phones? >> I’m reasonably sure all of them do.
Is there a light on in the room you're in? >> Nope, it’s daytime.
Is it anyone's birthday today that you know? >> Not that I know of.
When was the last time you visited someone in a hospital? >> That was Vlad when she was in neonatal, and that was... almost 4 years ago now? IDK.
Does anyone you know have a tongue that could rival Gene Simmons'? >> Yeah, actually, this girl I know does. She also happens to be a huge KISS fan, so it’s kinda fitting, lol.
Did you ever make your own website on piczo? >> No.
Are you currently happy with life? >> I’m happy to be alive.
Have you ever been the cause of an awkward silence? >> It’s highly likely.
Are you eating anything right now? >> No, but I should eat something soon.
Do you have small wrists? >> Indeed.
How many corners are there in the room you're in? >> I don’t feel like counting.
Have you ever captured a butterfly? >> No.
Who has the nicest eyes you know? >> ---
Be honest, do you currently miss someone? >> No.
Has an ex ever liked you when you were long over them? >> I don’t know.
Does the number 53 have any significance to you? >> Nope.
So... How about that weather? >> It’s all right, I suppose. It’s been milder than I usually expect out of August (which is an insufferable month most of the places I’ve lived).
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Is Virtual Photography the Next Great Artform?
https://ift.tt/eA8V8J
2020 saw the release of highly-anticipated games like The Last of Us Part II, Death Stranding on PC, Ghost of Tsushima, and Marvel’s Spider-Man: Miles Morales. What do all of these games have in common? Stellar in-game photo modes that allow a growing online community of virtual photographers to capture the beauty and complexity of these game worlds.
Fans have been taking screenshots of their favorite games for almost as long as they’ve been playing them. Photo modes themselves have existed at least as far back as 1999’s Metal Gear Solid: Integral, which featured a bare bones “photoshoot mode” as bonus content. And even back when most games didn’t have in-game photo modes, the most avid photographers created their own camera mods on PC or used third-party software like NVIDIA’s Ansel camera tool.
Photo modes have only grown more sophisticated since then, and a new generation of virtual photographers have honed their craft and are sharing their unique perspectives on social media to thousands of followers. You can now find dedicated virtual photography communities, hashtags, and aggregators on social media platforms as well as online magazines dedicated to the craft and even an app called Captis that’s pitching itself as the social home for the medium.
cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });
“I think the biggest benefit [of a photo mode] comes from having the ability to capture precious in-game moments that one can also share with others. It works as a sort of connection between the game world and the real world,” says Hiroaki Yoshiike, a lead level designer at Kojima Productions who worked on the stellar photo mode for Death Stranding, a game full of moody, detail-rich environments that serve as a particular paradise for photographers who love to capture stunning landscapes.
In fact, from the moment Kojima Productions decided to integrate a photo mode for the PC release, its main goal was to provide a user-friendly camera tool that also provided advanced features for more seasoned photographers. Yoshiike’s team worked alongside the Lighting and Cinematics teams on iterations of the mode.
“We created a prototype, but they told us it was too basic,” says Yoshiike of testing an early version of the photo mode with members of the team. “So we went back and started adding more features, adjusting until we arrived at the specs that you see in-game today. One part we got caught up on was figuring out how to provide the right tools for making pictures better, from lighting adjustments to stylized filters.”
These tools are very important to virtual photographers, who aren’t just taking pictures of “what looks cool” but are considering elements of real-world photography like composition, framing, and the rule of thirds. They’re thinking about depth of field, lighting, and filters. Virtual photographers take their craft seriously, and there’s a sense that their community of followers — many of which aren’t gamers at all — are doing so as well, following handles for the photographs themselves and not just because they’re fans of the subjects being captured. Could this mean that virtual photography is on the rise as the next great artform?
We talked to a group of photographers about their process, what they look for in a photo mode, and why they think virtual photography is becoming more popular.
Sindy JB
Sindy JB has photographed many games, but her haunting shots of Death Stranding on PC are among her best as they capture the phases of a long, Odyssean journey through a post-apocalyptic America. Shots of photorealistic mountainscapes and war-torn cities have earned her almost 20,000 followers across Twitter and Instagram, where she posts under the handle @mesopatmian_meow.
“Landscape pictures are probably my favorite subject to capture,” Sindy says of her technique. “I almost never plan my shots. I wait for the right place and moment. I don’t use filters a lot because I like my pictures to look as natural as possible.”
Rockstar’s award-winning Old West action game Red Dead Redemption 2 was the game that originally got her into virtual photography, and she’s gotten to know many photo modes since then. There are a few things she looks for when picking up a game’s camera component.
“The most important thing for me is the camera movements. Without free camera control it’s very hard for us to take the pictures we want to take. Some games restrict the camera with an orbital control only in their photo mode and it’s just terrible. I know I speak for many virtual photographers when I say it’s by far the most disappointing thing to see in a photo mode.”
Sindy’s following has grown quickly since her debut in 2018, and she posits that a lot of that has to do with the game makers themselves.
“I think there are many factors that led to the increased popularity of virtual photography, the first being the support we are getting from the game developers these days on social media sites. We often get likes, retweets, and comments from them, and it’s very encouraging.”
Berduu
Petri Levälahti, who goes by Berduu on Twitter, is one of the most popular virtual photographers in the community with over 40,000 followers. In fact, Levälahti has turned virtual photography into a career. He works as a Screen Capture Artist for Swedish game studio EA DICE, best known for the Battlefield and Star Wars Battlefront games.
Interestingly enough, the Battlefield 4 pictures taken by virtual photography legend Jim2point0 are what first enticed Levälahti to get involved with the community.
“Jim and other members of the screenshot community showed me the ropes. This was back when there really were no photo modes in games, outside of a few racing titles, so all the free cameras were created by fans. Most of the actually good game cameras are still created by fans, by people like Frans Bouma, for example.”
Levälahti does it all — portraits, landscapes, action shots. He needs to be multifaceted and have a keen eye for what will catch the viewer’s attention, a key element of his day job. At DICE, he takes marketing screenshots as well as the images you see on their games’ menus and loading screens.
“I get a request for a specific screenshot, let’s say an Action Shot in place X, with focus on Game Feature Y,” Levälahti says of his normal day-to-day at DICE. “Then I start to look for a good location or two and play around with ideas. I’ll do a handful of iterations before settling on one or two, consult an art director for notes, get approvals, do final captures, and ship it.”
Levälahti loves to shoot other games outside of DICE, too. Standouts include stylish portraits of characters from Control and Cyberpunk 2077 you could easily imagine as magazine covers. How does he do it?
“I always check that my shots work at small size — that there’s a clear subject, and that the shot is easy to read and you can tell what’s going on. I [also] check that my shots work at large size — are there ugly textures or assets shown too close and thus causing eyesore? Does the character’s leg clip through the floor, is there anything ruining the immersion? Awkward poses, non-existent shadows, aliasing? Always look for good light! Shadows and light make or break your shot.”
Soulsurrender
Soulsurrender, who also works as a freelance graphic designer and photographer in Sweden, got into virtual photography thanks to the seminal fantasy RPG The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, a game often celebrated for its beautiful vistas, lively settings, and cavernous depths.
“Mods made the game pretty and I just wanted to capture that. I didn’t really call it virtual photography or share any of my shots back then. That came much later, after realizing there was a whole amazing community out there.”
Soulsurrender has captured many subjects, including those within the worlds of Fallout 4, Mad Max, and Cyberpunk 2077, and she has a real eye for finding the majesty in dystopian settings. Her awe-inspiring shots of Mad Max’s endless deserts don’t even look like they’re from a video game despite the fact that she took up virtual photography after growing bored with shooting her real-world surroundings.
“I’m currently on a break after getting kind of burned out, getting frustrated with gear, and living in a small town of which nothing feels left to explore and shoot. Which naturally led me to find other ways to express my creativity: I started shooting virtual worlds instead, where the possibilities are nearly endless.”
Soulsurrender mainly likes to shoot vast landscapes, characters standing far off in the distance, colorful skies as backdrops. She says her approach to virtual photography is the same as in real-life: “go explore and find something interesting.”
Voldsby
“I’ve been a hobby photographer for a few years, so when I discovered that there was this feature where you can literally just stop the whole game to take pictures, that was when I became addicted to it.”
Danish photographer Voldsby has made a name for herself in the community with her portraits of The Last of Us Part II’s main characters. On her Twitter page, you’ll find pictures of Ellie and Abby, their faces half shrouded in thick shadow, as if to hide something in their expressions, while one eye looks straight at the camera. The gaze is so piercing it might make you cower.
“I like to really get close to my subjects and make them feel like they’re looking into the camera, [that] they’re aware that I’m taking the picture,” Voldsby says. “I know it sounds silly because it’s a video game, but it makes the photo come alive.”
Why has she spent so much time photographing TLOU2 specifically? Well, first off, she loves the series, but it also has a lot to do with the game’s incredible lighting. So much of the game takes place in creepy, enclosed areas like hallways and underground tunnels, and Voldsby finds it particularly exciting when she discovers “beautiful little light beams just sitting there in a window” to light her shots.
After Voldsby takes a picture, it goes through a “rigorous procedure” before she shares it online. She transfers the picture over as a PNG to a USB drive (pro tip: never use PlayStation’s Share function to upload your high quality photographs) and then she touches it up a little on Adobe Lightroom, mostly to add a bit more lighting or shadow to make sure things are popping. But when it comes to capturing the picture itself, Voldsby prefers a simple photo mode.
“It’s all about simplicity. Less is more, you know? I don’t really need any of those fancy features that a lot of photo modes have,” Voldsby says. “It’s just like real photography. Buying an expensive camera with loads of features doesn’t automatically make you a good photographer.”
Kayne
Kayne, whose Instagram handle @firstpersonshutter boasts almost 20,000 followers, dreamed of traveling the world as a freelance photographer for outlets like National Geographic, but soon found that he couldn’t afford it due to the cost of lenses and other equipment necessary for the job. But that hasn’t stopped him from practicing his craft in the video game world.
His favorite games to photograph are Insomniac’s Spider-Man series, and it’s easy to see why. Kayne can get a lot out of the high-flying web-swinging mechanics in the game as well as Spidey’s superheroic poses and myriad suits.
“In Spider-Man‘s case, arranging Spider-Man to where he’s looking at something that’s well-lit puts those reflections in the eye lenses so that you can actually get all those details on the face masks,” Kayne explains.
With photo mode, Kayne has found a new way to think about photography, and hopes that other artists will start to think of virtual photography as an artform, too. Will we one day see one of the pictures in this article hanging in a museum?
“I am very hopeful that it takes off into something bigger. And I feel like we’re on the ground floor.”
The post Is Virtual Photography the Next Great Artform? appeared first on Den of Geek.
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Going through my drafts, I found a post of myself liveblogging “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” from when I started (but never finished) a Steve Yockey rewatch last summer. So here you go if you want to read it.
Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets
And all the deancas shippers said, “Amen.”
Directed by Thomas J. Wright and featuring the adorable Alicia Witt as the Kill Bill-inspired titular character, “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” is just a 42-minute long old married couple fight interspersed with the coolest angels have been since Season 4. Yes, Steve, I will take more of this, thank you.
(Guys, I’m really gonna miss Steve Yockey next season.) (Note from April of this year: I am DEFINITELY missing Steve Yockey this season. Although Meredith Glynn’s still fab.)
We open on an arcade where an attractive woman is playing games and ignoring the employee telling her he’s about to close up shop. Enter another attractive woman, this one with red hair and an eyepatch, who starts trolling our first hottie. The first thing I notice is that the dialogue is less snappy in this scene than at any time during “Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox” so I’m just going to look at these ladies instead.
Tired of Eye-Patch’s trolling, Arcade Gamer starts to leave, only for Eye-Patch to keep blocking her way. The next exchange is delightfully testosterone-fueled.
“Move out of my way.” “Or what?” “Or I will move you.” “Go ahead. Try.” I feel like I’m watching the two jocks from Heathers.
Arcade Gamer tries to do something magical, but it doesn’t work, as Eye-Patch tells “Benjamin” -- who is not a dude, but an angel (as Cas will later tell us.) What follows next is kind of a boring fight, but the music is pretty good.
Eye-Patch (oh, who are we kidding, it’s Lily) pins Benjamin to the wall and tells him to call his angel friends. Benjamin starts speaking in Enochian and it apparently gets the attention of Castiel, Ishim and whoever the other angel this ep is (I forget) because we get some interesting shots of them all looking at the ceiling. Anyway, Lily kills Benjamin and leaves the arcade like a boss.
I really don’t want to narrate this whole episode, so I’m just going to make sarcastic notes like I did for my “Asa Fox” post.
Bunker scene (Part 1)
I do legitimately want to know: How did Kelly drop off the map? I mean, she’s not a spy, she’s a presidential aide. She has reporters who know her personally and follow her around. This would be like if Josh Lyman just disappeared one day in The West Wing.
(The whole president plot this season drives me nuts. There is literally no reason that Jack’s biological human father needs to be the president or that Kelly needs to work directly with the president, and there are so many other ways to get Dean and Sam locked up in a secret government base. This whole dumb fucking convoluted plot where the Winchesters are arrested for trying to assassinate the president and no one ever finds out about it is one plot in this show that I actually can’t suspend my disbelief for.)
Also, I think someone pointed out when this episode first aired that there is no reason for Cas to be in the kitchen, because he doesn’t eat, meaning he was just in the kitchen to deliberately not talk to Dean in Dean’s presence.
Cas straight up flounces across Dean’s line of sight this scene, you work it, buddy.
They are so passive aggressive and bitchy, I’m just expecting them to turn to Sam and demand he settle their argument over the Monty Hall problem.
Car scene
Dean turns down the opportunity to listen to music in the car because he wants everyone to know how he’s deliberately not speaking to Cas.
“This Benjamin sounds pretty cool, like he wouldn’t make any half-cocked, knee-jerk choices.” “Yeah, you know what I like about him is that he’s sarcastic, but he’s thoughtful and appreciative.” “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Dean’s internal monologue as he veers into the wrong lane: Oh my God, we’re going to see Cas’ ex-boyfriend!!!
The devout nun who Benjamin would never put in unnecessary danger sounds like way more than a friend.
Cas lets out at least two beleaguered sighs in this scene alone.
Arcade scene
So angels can identify/contact each other by their blades now? What does that mean for all the human hunters with blades?
Restaurant scene
“You, Castiel -- I liked the old you better.” Yeah, because you’re a dirty old man, Ishim.
(Mirabel, that’s the other angel’s name.)
“And you’re gonna storm in, riiiiiiiiiiggghht now.” God, I love Sam.
Dean “Feeling Left Out” Winchester sits down on Cas to let Ishim know he’s taken.
The actor who plays Ishim is Ian Tracey, and he plays a nice old man in The 100.
Ishim is such a racist he makes finger quotations when referring to Sam and Dean as “people.”
“Why do you let him talk to you like that?” says Dean, who says meaner things to Cas on a regular basis.
Dean just really doesn’t want to work with Cas’ other ex-boyfriend.
Ishim failing to smite Lily is super awesome. Girl has some badass angel powers.
Flashback Scene
Introducing Fem!Cas, which the fandom never got over.
I’m all for these angel ladies in turn-of-the-century dresses.
THAT SAID, these angels seem to think the human mother could be alive after birthing a nephilim, which is ... not how the rest of this season plays out.
Akobel looks pretty shocked when Cas accuses him of banging a human. Also, apparently presumed innocent and trial by a jury of peers aren’t a thing with angels.
And not to get too out of this episode, but where is Naomi, and shouldn’t she be on Ishim’s ass for trying to shack up with a human??
It’s pretty cool that Lily’s a professor (and of such a badass subject!) in 1905, when most women weren’t even going to universities.
Back in the present, Cas is extremely pretty. These shots are just all his good side.
Ishim and Cas in the church
This scene is actually pretty sexy -- Cas gently removing parts of Ishim’s clothes, Ishim moaning and writhing as Cas heals him and then them both panting when it’s over. Good thing Dean was gone or he would have punched them.
Hotel scene
I get that Dean and Sam are trying to reason with Lily, but the whole “He was just following orders” doesn’t work on a grieving mother. It’s also generally a weak moral argument, and the fact that Sam and Dean (who disobey orders from Heaven they think are unjust all the time) are using it at all demonstrates how they’re thinking with their hearts and not their heads to save Cas.
“Her name was May. And she was beautiful.” I just love the moms this season. (Mary, Lily, Kelly.)
Alicia Witt is honestly great. She’s so strong, but so fragile, so sad.
Ishim, of course, is classic abuser/stalker (which Dean’s figuring out), and while that kind of villain is slightly more Meredith Glynn’s wheelhouse, this won’t be the last time Yockey will write about this kind of issue.
“I had my daughter long before I ever laid eyes on an angel,” is the kicker of the whole scene. “My daughter was human.”
And then Dean’s like, “oh fuck, gotta call Cas”
Also, did Ishim take Cas’ phone? Why can’t Cas find it?
And then Dean goes back to save Cas, because nobody messes with Dean’s husband but Dean, dammit!
(for some reason I didn’t finish the post, and I’m not turning off Lost Girl to watch a Supernatural episode right now, but just trust me, the end is great.)
#supernatural#dean and cas are married#steve yockey appreciation post#lily sunder has some regrets#cleaning out my drafts y'all
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New Post has been published on Harold Gross: The 5a.m. Critic
New Post has been published on http://literaryends.com/hgblog/ready-player-one/
Ready Player One
[3 stars]
While Ready Player One is a fun romp while you watch it, it isn’t a great movie; it missed being the brilliant classic it should have been.
Like many of the gamers in the Oasis, it hovers at the edges of greatness, but never manages to cross the finish line. There are certainly casting and script reasons for this, but primarily the fault lies with Spielberg’s (The Post) direction. What he delivered feels something like The Wizard of Oz meets Tron (with a bit of Zardoz thrown in) for High Schoolers. But let’s start with the good.
Production-wise, the creative team really got it. Even forgetting the lack of tech advancement they envisioned at points, they created wonderful interfaces and a good sense of an immersive game world. The VR sequences are imaginative and absorbing. See it on a big screen to really get the full effect and appreciate the richness and complexity of the view.
Another great part of the fun in this popcorn flick is that Spielberg manages to make more bald references to other movies than any other film I can remember (barring satires like Scary Movie that do it to make fun of the source). There were constant groans and laughs of joy at recognizing the references. I won’t spoil any here as, honestly, they are about the best part of the film. Now, whether those references were appropriate for a story that takes place in 2045 is a different question.
Despite these pluses, action, and visual candy, the movie just ends up sitting there on screen.
Tye Sheridan (X-Men: Apocalypse) is a large part of the reason for that lack of life. He just isn’t up to the task of carrying a major motion picture, though Olivia Cooke (The Limehouse Golem) does her level-best to help him through it and support him. She sparkles on screen. But you just can’t connect to the characters or story. Sure, we want the crazy kids to recognize their totally obvious and middle-America attraction to one another as two healthy, white, young folk (talk about unbrave choices given the possibilities that are even discussed at several points). There are also some great one liners and moments by T.J. Miller (Deadpool) and Lena Waithe (Master of None) but neither gets a plotline or payoff. Ultimately, we don’t really care all that much who lives or dies or who gets together or not. Heck, even Sheridan doesn’t seem to care who lives or dies; he doesn’t carry the weight of any action that occurs to or around him in the tale as it progresses.
Even the bad guys, Ben Mendelsohn (Una) and Hannah John-Kamen (The Tunnel), don’t raise a burning need in the audience to wipe them out. Why? First, because we’re always sure who will win, but second because there is no gray. Our bad guys are just bad and their storylines are just absurd. C’mon, John-Kamen’s character is named F’Nale. Seriously? Only Cameron’s unobtanium was sillier. If you’re going to go for that kind of tongue-in-cheek, then you have to do it across the board, not just in spots.
The truth is that most of these gaps in acting are really more how they were directed. In trying to make a 4-quadrant film, Spielberg blew it, however sacrilegious that may be to say. The result was something that aimed broadly intellectually, but was emotionally targeted squarely at the 12-17 year old bracket. The real-world sequences are as distant and unbelievable as the VR sequences are wonderfully fantastic. It is an issue Spielberg often has (A.I. comes to mind as a comparable tale in scope and maturity). Spielberg, when aiming at a younger audience, never quite lets you in to connect with anyone. He likes to keep it all “safe.” And the ending sequences in the real world of Ready Player One just fall apart, being both unbelievable, too easy, and just plain, well, stupid.
Part of the problem was the script by Penn (Alphas) and source book author Cline. It shortcuts a lot of the plot and forces relationships and situations in very unnuanced ways. That approach played into Spielberg’s hands and weaknesses. He loves evoking that sense of the 50s in modern garb, trying for a storybook feel that offends no one but, at this point, also illuminates nothing. We’re past the days of E.T. and Close Encounters feeling real; show us less than truth and reality and our bullshit meters goes off. Life is messier and we know that. We may crave simplicity, but it needs to be a believable simplicity.
Spielberg, even misdirected the brilliant Mark Rylance (The BFG) and Simon Pegg (Ice Age: Collision Course), allowing them to be put in makeup and costumes that made them look ridiculous. The intent was to bring out the nerd in the nostalgia, but they just never came across a bit as believable or natural. They felt like clowns, neither smart enough nor adept enough to have built the empire that included the Oasis.
Ready Player One is a reasonable distraction. There have been many adaptations of video games to screen, most of which have been middling at best. The recent Tomb Raider was only the latest in a long line. We’ve also been assaulted by adaptations of books since the beginning of film to varying degrees of success; for me, that was most recently Love, Simon. This is, however, the first time I can remember an adaptation of a book about a fictitious video game. Talk about going completely meta. Jumanji (which was a way better movie) doesn’t count as it wasn’t a book first.
Ready Player One is certainly a big screen film, so if you do want to see it, you really do have to see it at the theater. But, as a story, it will not stand the test of time. For many, I suspect it will not stand the test of its 2.5 hours as anything other than as a short-lived amusement. You can see the possibilities in the result and you’ll enjoy the cultural insider jokes that glue it all together, but you’ll leave it empty and unfulfilled, or perhaps filling in the missing aspects mentally for yourself to prop it up. The more I thought about the film as I walked away, the more disappointed I became with it. That was not the experience I had hoped for, nor the experience I had expected from such a master filmmaker. At one point, all I could think was that I wished Spielberg’s good friend Kubrik had still been alive to take this one on. He would have the balls to keep it real and dark while still entertaining. As it is, Ready Player One needs some Extra Life of its own to succeed.
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Top 10 Scariest Video Games
Halloween is upon us and we at Japandaman thought we’d get into the spirit by showcasing a list of the top 10 scariest horror games. A lot of thought went into this and no doubt you probably won’t agree with all of it. If you don’t, we’d love to hear about some of the games that scared the pants off of you! Maybe we’ll give them a go and see how long we can last playing them in the dark...
In no particular order, our list starts with...
10. Alan Wake
With the eerie, not of place Twin Peaks-esque setting, this game hit that nerve in your body that unsettles you from the word go. It’s not so much that it’s a game full of gore and horror but what it does do it substitute those factors for something that is more disturbing and mildly uncomfortable. It’s a game that does it well and has inspired other games since then.
9. F.E.A.R.
This is one game that came out of nowhere and scared the crap out of many gamers. With it’s weird dreamlike states and illusions caused by Alma, the little girl that is creepy soley by existing. The first person view, watching things happening when there’s no one else in view, makes the hairs on the back of your stand up and has you looking over your shoulder. A true classic even today.
8. Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem
This is one Nintendo Gamecube game that has a special place in my heart. With it’s unique time travelling levels and the use of the cleverly implement Sanity Meter, you can never tell if what you’re looking at is real or just in your head. Once the Sanity Meter kicks in, you can expect things to happen like the volume on your TV adjust itself, the Gamecube itself crashing or even in-hame power ups not working like they’re supposed to. But...are these things really happening or is it all in your head?
7. Until Dawn
One of the newer titles in this list landed on the PS4 in grand style with it’s incredible visuals, recognisable actors, stunning locales and brilliant storytelling. With the characters in the game all trying to survive with a maniac on the loose, the cabin and dark, snow filled environment make the perfect setting for many jumps and yelps. You can’t help but develop to have feelings for your favourite characters while you learn to detest others. And the sharp design of the game sees the decisions you make while talking to your in-between levels psychiatrist come back to haunt you later in the game. Is any decision you make in the game truly the right one?
6. Fatal Frame II: Crimson Butterfly
No list would be complete without a mention of the Fatal Frame series and Crimson Butterfly truly had us shook during the playthrough. Using an ancient camera as your only defence seems like a foolish weapon but when you weigh it up against the spooky spectres which can be beaten by it, you quickly learn that the camera is your best friend. With a storyline involving two sisters, guilt and loss, it sets the scene for one of the most disturbing entries in the series. If you get the chance, play the Wii U entry, Fatal Frame: Maiden Of Black Water, another worthy entry.
5. Outlast
Outlast ticks all the boxes for a truly scary experience. Asylum, check. Dark environments, check. Enemies bigger than life, check. Little to no weapons, check. Employing a first person perspective, this is one game that throws you right into the action and early on you see that you’re up against insurmountable odds. With scary enemies (mouths sewn shut) and terrifying men (wearing someone’s skin), this is one game that will stay with you after the credits roll.
4. Resident Evil 4
Another game that hit the Nintendo Gamecube and ripped the survival horror franchise right open. With main protagonist, Leon Kennedy sent into a wooded area with weird religious characters, all the while fighting his way through with limited ammo while trying to find the daughter of the USA, it’s a scarily brilliant game. And even after you find her, the scares don’t stop there as you basically have to head to the extraction zone while also trying to protect her, Ashley. She’s not the brightest girl which makes for some extremely tense moments in the game. The re-release on the Wii and again the PS4 opened up the experience to a new audience and if you haven’t played it yet, we strongly urge you to. This is a true classic, ageless game.
3. Resident Evil 1
With it’s claustrophobic mansion setting, extremely limited save opportunities and ammo, fighting off zombies, zombie dogs and other assorted nasties was never more scary or creepy when this game hit up the PS1. It introduced gamers around the world to the concept of Survival Horror and started a series that has had more ups than downs. The STARS team need your help to rescue their missing members, can you find them before you get eaten alive?
2. P.T.
This demo which was to be a new Silent Hill new game has been shelved but this demo from Hideo Kojima and film maker, Guillermo Del Toro, brought a truly unique experience to Playstation. How they manage to effectively take one hallway, place it on repeat and offer a new experience each time you walk through it is truly astonishing and quite a unique experience. It isn’t what you see that makes it scary but rather what you don’t see and what keeps you guessing around each corner. It has jumps, thrills, puzzles and more. Truly a shame that it’s only a teaser.
1. Silent Hill 2
Another series that needs to be mentioned is Silent Hill and in particular Silent Hill 2. Set in a town covered in a perpetual mist with a radio that begins to spew out static any time an enemy is near will play on your nerves. Because you can’t see them until they’re usually on top of you, the static noise will often have you walking in the opposite direction, too scared to confront what awaits you in the dark. You control James Sunderland who receives a note from his dead wife and of course has to investigate. However at every turn, he has to battle his inner demons as he finds himself swimming in a pool of regret, guilt and fears. A truly atmospheric experience.
What do you say? Do you agree, disagree, have your own list? We’d love to hear about them, let us know!
#horror#halloween#featured#survival horror#scary#resident evil#silent hills#playstation#nintendo#xbox
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