#but then its like ignores any chance to mention skys future

[thetimelordbatgirl]

How the mentions of the Smith family in Whotopia got me like.

[balvares]

wave goodbye.

self para, location unknown. triggers: stabbing, torture, knives, blood, violence, death. mentioned: @dilara-kr, @applekiraz, @analusilvas, @feykaplan, @dominicdavis, @davinadias.

       I’ll be careful. I promise. Those were the last words Bianca said to Dilara before going out that same night. She was being careful. For the first time in a long time, she wanted to keep her promise. Nightrest wasn’t as safe as she had thought it’d once been. Even for the girl who thrived in spending her life living in the moment, not thinking about past or future, she didn’t have it in her to leave her friends worried about her—or scared because she continued to spend most of her nights so .. recklessly. 

Bi had been drinking, it would’ve been a lie to say she wasn’t, but she knew what she was doing. Despite every promise she once made, she had always been a social drinker. The kind of girl who drank because she was surrounded by people. Wanting to be able to mix in with all the fun as opposed to focusing on remaining completely sober—or close to it. Tonight hadn’t been any different. The brunette said goodbye to everyone she’d spent her night with, a smile on her face as she dangled the screen of her phone in front of them. “I’ve got an Uber coming,” she slurred before sloppy steps brought her outdoors. Soft laughs slipping out of her as she stood by the curb, slightly dizzy vision taking in the surroundings as she did the only thing she could do. Wait. 

A part of her wonders if she should’ve waited inside, or continued inside. Maybe if she had, Bianca wouldn’t have been standing under the dark sky, vulunerable. Easy prey. Even as she stood there, nothing felt out of the ordinary. Not until the sound of footsteps rang in her ear. They sounded close, fast, and as she attempted to turn around—see who it was—there was an impact against her head. A hard one. Hard enough that stars began to cloud her already messy vision. And before there was even a chance to react, to scream, call for help, she felt it again. Then everything went black. 

later .

She could feel the hard surface against her body, the coldness prickling at the skin that was exposed. She was on the floor. Bianca’s lids rapidly began to open—seeing nothing but blackness. Her eyes covered. The tight feeling against the opening of her mouth. Her mouth tied up, too. Wanting to reach up and take whatever it was off her face, it was then the woman realized that her hands were also tied behind her. She couldn’t see, speak, or move the way she wanted. That was the start of her panic—memories of the footsteps, being hit. Bianca desperately tried to fight against whatever was holding her wrists locked together, ignoring the way the friction burned her skin, as she tried (and failed) to stand or even sit. Anything was better than the way she was currently.  Where am I? Is anybody there? Questions she tried to ask, but coming out as nothing more than a muffled sound. 

This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t be happening. 

Fingers gripped into her hair, the sharp pain being enough to have Bianca yelp as they roughly lifted her up—eyes closed tightly beneath the blindfold. She listened, waiting for someone to say something. Anything. Let her know what was going on, what she was doing here but nothing came. The only sound she could hear was her own ragged breath. It felt like ages, their fingers still knotted in her hair while nothing happened. It was the silence that scared her. From more than what she’s ever experienced. 

Then she felt the blade pierce through her stomach. Fast, rough. The feeling of it having the woman cry out in pain, already feeling the tears pricking from her eyelids. Then another one. And another. On her stomach again. On her side. In and out. Rough edges of, what she could only assume, was a knife ripping its way in and out of her skin. Tears being shed but soaked up through the cloth that covered eyes.  Shedding with every impact of their hands, or their feet, the knife. Constant blows. Again. And again. And again.

Stop. Stop. Please. Words that repeatedly came out of her mouth with every plunge, desperately wishing that they’d stop. To stop hurting her. She didn’t deserve this. Those same stars floating across her already masked vision—wishing she knew who was doing it. Who hated her this much? Hated her enough to want to see her hurt like this. In so much pain. 

Even as she thought about it, there was a single person who managed to come to mind. Bianca believed that in all of her years of living, she’s never done anything worth of this. She’s always been a good person. Talked to everyone, kept herself away from drama that didn’t involve her. What did she do that could be so wrong? To bring out this kind of … hate in a person. Because they had to hate her. There was no denying it. 

Even in the midst of it all, Bianca still couldn’t hear anything. Only the sound of her own masked screams, the sound of her breathing echoing within her ears. The agony of the inflicted wounds being the only thing she could seem to focus on. If they were saying anything, she couldn’t hear it. For a moment, it felt as if time stopped. 

The hands that once were entangled in her hair now shoved her down. Bianca’s body hitting the ground and her head knocking against the surface of the floor—a ringing sound immediately echoing in her ears from the impact.  That’s when she heard it.

There was a laugh. A woman’s laugh. Something that was easy to distinguish even as the sound drifted further away from her—words coming out of her, but nothing Bianca could pick up.  She heard her. Whoever she was. That was a woman’s voice and there was no denying it, but who was she talking to? Despite all the pain she felt, the brunette tried her hardest to listen. To see if she could hear whoever was being addressed. Did she know that voice?

She didn’t have time to think about it. Not before the sound of another scream flooded her ears. It wasn’t ear piercing, but it was a sound that mimicked one of her own. The same kind of scream she continued to release with every blow of the blade. Someone else was here. Bianca’s cries could only grow harder as she remained on the ground—weakly fighting against her retraints.  Unable to stop herself from aching for whoever else it was going through the same thing she was; listening to those heart wrenching sounds while she couldn’t do a thing to help. That being enough to make her cries grow harder. Bianca, even in the midst of her own pain, couldn’t keep herself from crying out to whoever it was. She didn’t need to know who they were or why they must’ve been there. Whoever it was, they didn’t deserve this. Neither of them did. 

Time moved by slowly. The sound in the distance became more faint with every passing minute, or hour, she didn’t know, but it was enough for one thing to ring clear for Bianca. These were her final moments. They’re final moments. She knew that. In the midst of everything happening, her mind couldn’t help but to shift toward the people she cared most about—Analu, Fey, Dominic, Davina, Dilara, Apple. 

Apple. Her best friend. Sister. Soulmate.  Their last conversation replayed in her head during her final moments. Being aunties, having children. Living the rest of their lives together. Things they’ve spoken about hundreds of times and it wasn’t until this moment did it finally hit Bianca that it wouldn’t happen. She’d never grow old enough to see Apple become the cool aunt she so desperately wanted to be. Never get to have kids of her own looking up at her best friends with the same admiration and love that Bianca held for her. She’d never see Apple have kids. Something she knew her best friend wanted so badly. Even with the way she brushed it off, playing it off as nothing more than a simple thought, Bianca knew better. She could see the sadness hidden behind those eyes and now, those words played in her head again: You’re time will come. It was lighthearted at the time, but during this moment, she meant it. Every single word. One of her last moments praying that she’d stop being plagued by whatever was in her thoughts and do it. Have the family she wanted. The kids. Grow old, be happy. It’s what she deserved. 

It was as if the killers knew what she was thinking about. Feeling those hands pulling her up again,  the blade making its way to her neck and for the first time since it started, Bianca wanted it all to stop. Not in the same way she once had, but she wanted them—whoever they were—to put an end to it all. To the pain. Her suffering.  She couldn’t do it anymore. She could feel the blood pooling at her feet, skin raging as it constantly reminded her of what they put her through. She couldn’t do it anymore. 

The rigged ends dug deeply into her neck, gliding its way across her neck and even if Bianca wanted to scream, the pooling blood from behind her mouth made it impossible. She could feel it, her blood, pouring out—drenching her clothes. There was no longer a fight in Bianca. Within seconds, she could feel her body growing weak. Limp. Then she was gone. 

[bluetooththereptile]

A heart's guardian

Guardian angel Jotaro x fem reader

( English is not my first language so I apologize for any mistakes in the following text.)

Note: this is a gift from me to my dear friend @helpimhyperfixating. Check out their blog they've got so many interesting fics for our Jotaro boy!

Tw: mentions of depression and suicide

Never in your life, you had thought that you'd be fascinated by the darkness outside. As you adjusted your place on your couch you ignored the hissing sound of the gas that was pouring into your living room, trying to cope with the nauseous feeling the gas's horrible smell brought to you. Sun had just set and the sky lost its red color, forming into an empty abyss, just like your heart.

It was just in the morning when you found out about your partner cheating on you. It was heartbreaking, the one that you had thought of making a future with had been spending their time elsewhere with someone else, while you were working countless hours to make money, so you could afford a decent wedding. In the morning a piece of your heart broke, but there was more to come. Before noon you received a call about the fall of your stake's price, meaning that all of your savings meant nothing now, the horrible news floated into your mind as more and more things went wrong, from your loss of fortune to your car's accident and your sibling's illness getting far worse, your heart could cope with such things to a specific extent and after that, you'd lose it....and that was what you were doing now.

You were neutral to the concept of life, sometimes you'd appreciate your chance of being on earth and sometimes you loathed to think that you were forced into living such a life, but in the end, you haven't thought of taking your own life before, until today. The lights were off but you could see the numbers on the grandpa clock in the room, it was just past 8 pm, which meant there was time for you to rest and take in the gas. Your parents wouldn't call you until it was 10 pm, and everything would've ended by the time they were going to call.

You didn't know how you decided on suffocating yourself, but by the time you gained your senses back, you already had taken three sleeping pills and had sealed up all of the doors of the living room and the kitchen, you had pushed Jojo out of the room. And now here you were, laying on your couch with the set of rings you had bought for you and your partner, as you looked out of the window, your body getting heavier each minute passing. You knew when you closed your eyes, that you wouldn't wake up again.

Your eyelids were going to close and let you lose yourself in the darkness when you heard the distressed noise of a cat. A pair of gleaming eyes that stared at you appeared behind the window. You knew who they belonged to. Your giant British short hair cat had found a way out and now was pawing at the window of the living room while meowing in distress, as if it knew what his owner was doing. Jojo was the only light in your life, that was why you had left a note for your parents to let them know that your last request you'd be having from them is that they take care of him. Your grandmother had snuck the cat when he was just a curious kitten into your room years ago, telling you that he was a special gift from someone that loved you dearly.

You had thought that person was your grandmother, but when years later, you thanked her for giving Jojo to you she just simply smiled "You should thank someone else for him!" Who? You never found out, you lost your grandmother just days after, and the bizarre cat's origins remained unknown to you. Jojo was indeed a bizarre cat, he acted like he could understand what you meant. He was quiet most of the time and liked to sleep next to your feet or on your nightstand, but he refused to be hugged or touched affectionately. He ate his food and was quite eager to have his meals but didn't like treats, he rarely left your side but he never gained weight or need sleep which was strange for a lazy cat like him. He just stared at you with his big blue eyes, its fluffy paws killing off your depression whenever you hugged him.

But this time even he couldn't save you from your severe depression. You groaned and turned away from the window, trying to ignore Jojo's loud meowing. You let out a deep sigh, hugging the ring box tighter as you closed your eyes. Everything will end, you thought to yourself, your pain will be gone. With those thoughts, you gave into the urge to sleep and fell into the darkness.

Some time passed, it seemed like hours already, you thought you were floating in the air, so death looked like this? You thought to yourself, but suddenly a sharp pain on your cheek made you open your eyes wide and find yourself in a place that seemed like a forest where everything in it had turned grey. You were laying on the ground covered by dry leaves, someone's hand holding you by the collar of your clothes. Your mind was alert as if you just hadn't taken pills or were not nauseous because of the gas, that was why you noticed the large hand that held a tight grip on you.

Looking up, you found yourself being glared at by a tall man, and his beauty stunned you. The winged man was fair, with sharp cheeks and strong jaws, his broad shoulders covered by a blue robe, his intense glare aiming at you. "How could you?" He hissed, his deep voice echoing in your mind. "How could you do that?" He asked the question as he raised his free hand to slap you, making you flinch. But his hand didn't hit you, he threw you down so you could lay on the floor as he let out a strangled sob, walking away from you as he talked, his voice hurt and filled with pain.

"After all of those years of protecting you, this is my reward? I have to watch you die and ignore me while I can't do anything to help you?" He said, large bids of tears falling onto his cheeks, wetting his fair features. You were confused as you looked around, it seemed you were in an unknown place which seemed to be a forest, but nothing moved and there was utter silence beside the angel who was sobbing loudly. You opened your mouth to talk but suddenly your jaws were shut close as the angel shouted "You won't talk this time!" So you were forced to listen as so many questions filled your mind.

"From the very first day of your life I looked after you in many different forms, I watched as many of my siblings die of grief, knowing that they couldn't help their assigned humans, but I was determined to keep you safe, so I could vanish with a smile on my face, telling myself I did my duty right. But you! You! You didn't let me! You with your stupid expectations and poor taste in people! I watched you melt down just because of the influence others had on you...and now...you've ended your life...such a selfish human you are!" He spoke as he walked.

Your mind tried to process what he was talking about, clearly, he was an angel, and the way he spoke meant that he was actually a guardian angel. Your guardian angel. Were you hallucinating or something? "No matter how many times I slay demons and fend off bad spirits you always find a way to be depressed! "Oh, no one loves me!" "Oh, they left me behind!" "Oh, what to do I lost a pair of filthy papers!" He nagged as he mimicked your voice, walking from side to side as you looked up at him, your body too heavy for you to move.

"Then what am I here?" He yelled, making you flinch again. "What am I here? Just a Nany you won't even think of? All those years of sacrifice, all those times that I pulled you out of accidents was nothing? Didn't you think I loved you? Didn't you think there was someone that loved you out there? How many times have I had to beg you to not choose the false thing and you choose the false way? Am I not worthy of your attention?" Your grandmother had told you stories of your inner voice being an angel guiding you to the right way when you were younger, could it be that your old memories were taking form inside your dying mind? You had heard a human's mind could pause the time and make it seem like a long time before it died. What you were watching couldn't be real, right?

"Look at me when I'm talking to you!" The angel shouted, bringing your attention to him once more. "I haven't risked my position as a guardian by pulling your soul out of the abyss of the dying humans for you to just stare blankly at anything but me!" He said, marching to you. "I didn't take the form of an animal and spent years counting insects and watched you ruin your life for you to ignore me like this!" He knelt, his voice losing its sharpness as he held your face when he touched you; his anger subsided as he looked into your eyes, and with saying "You beautiful fool!"   started to cry again.

"Why you do this to me Y/N...haven't you heard so many times that there's someone out there that loves you without even wanting something in return? Haven't you thought how precious you are? I curse all of your thoughts degrading yourself! I watched you grow and saw how you learned to walk and talk, I guarded you through the worst times of your life, and you...you kill yourself...doing the worst thing you could ever do!" He said as his hand caressed your face, his sadness making your non-existing heart clench. It seemed oh so real!

"Thankfully I had the chance to bring your neighbors who could help you...let's just hope you wouldn't end up with something you'd regret for the rest of your life..." he whispered in your ear as he held you closer, his warmth making you close your eyes as he lost his anger, holding you closer. "I know it's a guilty pleasure of mine by letting you know about my existence, but I couldn't help myself, all of that frustration had to be let loose or I'd lose my mind..." he continued to talk as you felt bliss just being held by him.

You didn't know how much time passed, but the angel held you close to him, not letting you go. "Jotaro!" A great voice echoed in the forest, making the leaves move as if the wind had started blowing. The angel held you closer, clawing at you. "Let the mortal go Jotaro...they need to go back!" Jotrao, your guardian angel, muttered a no as his grip on you tightened. "I won't tell others about what you did, because I understand...but you have to let them go...they can't stay here any longer...their mortal vessel demands its soul!" You felt another person's presence but you couldn't see anything due to the bright light illuminating behind Jotaro, so you buried your head in his chest as you listened.

"I...I don't want to!" Jotaro said, hearing his sad voice making you sad as well, he desperately pleaded to have you with him for some more time, never in your life, did you think someone would act like that to just have you beside them. The other person refused his plea, reminding him that you had to leave. Jotaro's head leaned down to press a soft kiss on your temple before he put you down covering your eyes. Whispering in your war before pushing you down into the darkness "Whenever you need me...I'll be there..."

This time your body quickly felt heavy as you felt like you were going to suffocate. Your eyes opened once more and this time your blur vision took in the nurses that tried to calm you down while putting an oxygen mask on your face to help you breathe, your ears ringing because of the constant loud beeping of the monitors that checked your vitals. You were on earth once more, you were saved! But how? Two days passed and by some miracle, you had recovered faster than you normally would, though you wouldn't get away from your family and friends' harsh scolding, reminding you that there were people out there that cared for you.

"Where's Jojo?" You asked your mother as she tried to feed you one more spoon of your food while you had told her that you were full already. She sighed "Good thing that you reminded me, I was forgetting the big fella!" and pushed the last spoon into your mouth as you groaned before she stood up and left your room, only to come back with Jojo in her arms, the heavy cat's weight making her huff as she put him down on your lap. The cat was quick to purr and rub its head on your belly as you scratched his back. "How's my little hero?" You cooed at Jojo, remembering your mother telling you that if it was not for his loud noises your neighbors wouldn't have found and rescued you.

As you scratched his head you noticed the collar around his neck, Jojo didn't like collars, but he had one on now and he seemed he didn't mind it. You looked at the silver medal on the collar, your mother noticing your curiosity "Oh I found this one in granny's stuff... this one was for your kitten but she had forgotten to give it to you! I put it on the fella and he seemed to like it!" "Jotaro..." you read the name on the collar loudly, and the cat let out a meow as he looked at you as if he knew you had called for him. "J-jotaro?" Your voice broke as the memory of the time you were unconscious hit you hard, making you tear up as you called the cat over and over by his name as he rubbed his head to your palms, you cried, knowing well who was inside that cat's body.

As people say...there's always a person out there who loves you, so take care of yourselves.

[tnystrk-exe]

Stress Relief

Warnings: 18+ masturbation, oral fem receiving, fingering, PinV, alcohol mentions, cockwarming mention.

Masterpost

Chapter One

Chapter Four

You filled out stack upon stack of internship applications. All having to do with biomechanics in some form or another a couple going into more specific aspects. Each page was the same series of information followed by dull questions. You had to fluff up answers for acting as if this was the greatest opportunity that was ever before you. Maybe one of them could be, but black and white text was burning into your eyelids as long as you’ve been going at it and you could hardly keep your mind on anything else but getting this process over with.

Next year your doctorate will be completed. Getting an internship for the summer was a high priority given it could help with potential jobs in the future and a decent feel at what to expect when it’s time to really get to work.

Sighing, you sealed the last envelope. Sitting back, you rubbed your wrist, looking at the stack of neatly piled envelopes. One of these would be a sort of beginning to the rest of your life. A taste of what’s to come… Eager to stop thinking about the whole process, you grabbed them all and walked down to the drop box on the sidewalk.

The months had you on edge, test after test, hour upon hours of demanding people. Even with being away from it, it’s all you could think of, constantly pestering and difficult to ignore. An annoying wound that refused to stop making every move feel like too much strain.

Then the future demanded more worry in its mysterious nature.

What would become of you when school was over and done with? That familiar, safe routine that had been a part of your life for as long as you could remember, no longer a thing. You could flounder. You could succeed. Anything was possible. Nothing imponderable. There were so many ways this life could go…

It was all so frustrating…

Not knowing.

You looked around.

Had that much time passed that the whole day simply flew by without you noticing? Watching as the stars twinkled and the moon casted it’s faint reflection. He crossed your mind then, always when you wanted some peace. There was some solace in knowing that Otto could be looking up at the same sky too. It helped lessen this distance that had been manufactured.

Going back to your apartment, you decided to forgo the pretenses of dinner and headed straight for your room. Laying on the bed you tried desperately to get some sleep, desperate for this day to come to a close. You twisted and tossed hoping to find any comfortable position to rest your head. Time passed on and your mind refused to give you any peace. The faint blue cast of the alarm clock, your only company.

Fuck it, you were going to clear your head one way or another. Even if it was that night that always decided it would be all you’d think of. There was always a twinge of guilt but that was the best memory you had to get the job done.

Closing your eyes, you mimicked the way he had traced your face, imagining that lingering scent of tobacco on his fingertips. Damn how he Pavloved you into getting excited at the thought of him being near anytime you caught a whiff of smoke. His presence sweetened the scent more than it deserved. The free hand trailed slowly down your chest, groping as he had not too hard, but firm enough you’d arch yourself back for more contact. His chuckle when you whined for more rang in your ears.

Sadness of the act had disappeared after that moment, in large both of you pretending this was something that could be a common occurrence. It wasn’t a thing to mourn the quickly passing time because there would always be another chance. Night? Morning? Time was of no consequence. You’d have each other as you pleased. There was no reason to rush this quiet moment.

You thought about the time Otto kissed down your chest and stomach. Greed got to you in hopes that he’d venture further. How couldn’t it? He was the one person you’ve ever loved this way so much it nearly made you sick, of course you wanted to get more than your fill of him. But instead he rested his head against your stomach, his arms wrapping around you to keep you close, and gave a soft sigh as his body relaxed against yours. Somehow that had been better. Knowing you could make him feel such a way. You could allow him that for a moment, simply stroking his hair.

It tugged at your heart and made your throat hurt.

Now wasn't time for those sweet things you weren’t allowed.

Instead you imagined it was his hand trailing down your body and into your shorts. He hadn’t wasted any time and neither did you. You circled your clit thinking of how much better those dark curls of his would look between your legs. His eyes would probably look up at you so sweetly those first couple of times. Until he got cocky about how well he knew your body and that sweetness would morph into challenge and taunt your reactions.

When there was enough slickness, you dipped two fingers into yourself. They wouldn’t make do to pretend it was his hand, you’ve held it and knew they made yours look so much smaller, but they had to for now.

How would he…?

Slow build up to get you used to the feeling making you comfortable before going faster to make your head reel. Your hips bucked up as you imagined his comforting weight on top of you as he whispered quietly into your ear.

“Is this what you needed, little girl?”

“Otto, please…” you moaned uselessly into the air.

Annoyingly, your head decided to think of the way he rolled his hips against yours when you finally got him to help relieve some pleasure. The way his hands held your hips in place as he let out too quiet groans. What a treat it would have been to have him here to fuck the stress out of you until the push and pull of him was all you could bother yourself to think of…

A specifically picked out ringtone ruined your fantasy.

Think of the devil.

Sighing you picked up the phone. “This better be important, Octavius.”

“It’s not. Did I interrupt something?”

“Cardio.”

The line was silent for a moment as he realized what your response meant. “Do you always answer the phone?”

“I don’t make a habit of it. No. Usually remember to turn the ringer off, but I figured since I was trying to remember your voice anyway,” you stated boldly.

“That’s forward.”

“And you’ve never…?”

He didn’t answer, only the sound of his tools filled the silence.

“Oh,” you grinned, pouncing on it, “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours. Do I call you doctor or sir? Does it sound pretty? Want to hear me say it like it’s in the moment? I’ll do it just for you.”

“YN, stop it.”

“There isn’t any shame here. I’ve already felt it through my clothes a couple times. Intimidating but I like you enough to try,” you continued teasing.

“Enough, YN.”

You laughed, “Are you going to think of this later? Me in my bed getting off to the idea of you? Whimpering and moaning for you, when you’re not even here.”

The sound of tools clattering onto the desk.

“You liked that idea.”

“I…”

“Why do you deny us the one thing we want?”

“You don’t want this,” he insisted as always.

You groaned, “Otto, do you respect me?”

“You know I do,” he answered instantly.

“Then please stop telling me what it is I want. I can respect you not wanting to go on with this even if I don’t like it, but I’m not having you presume anything that happens in my head. I hate when people do that and I don’t like hating a thing about you.”

“Okay. I’m sorry.”

“Back to what I was saying. I think it would be very nice and beneficial if you let me keep you warm while you worked. Let you use me as you pleased throughout the night. Or maybe you’d like me on my knees under your bench?”

He groaned and you heard a thump, “My sweet, darling girl, I’m suffering it enough as it is. I understand I caught you in the moment but dragging me down with you is plain cruel.”

“Come do something about it, Octavius.”

“And if I do?”

“I-“ you sputtered, caught off guard, “I…”

“Poor thing can’t even speak now. All that show you were making seconds ago and you fold with a few syllables,” he tsked, “I thought it would take a lot more.”

“N-no I…”

“Like I thought.” He worked for a while as he let you sit in this silence. “What did you get up to today?”

“I was, uh,” shit what had you been doing? “filling out forms for internships.”

“Any nearby?” He wondered.

“I think one or two were in New York, yeah, I’m not so sure they’d take me though they were kind of the more elite ones.”

“Why not? You’re amazing. I could speak to people if you’d like.”

“Well, if you were the one to decide if I was good enough, I’m glad to know I’d have an acceptance,” you thought a moment on his offer, “No. We were at that conference together and the panel were other big names in all of this. While a recommendation from you would do me wonders…”

“You don’t want anyone to think you did anything to sway my opinion,” he realized with a sigh, “YN, I haven’t told a soul of anything and nor would I ever. That’s ours alone.”

“I’m not ashamed of a second of it. Look if we were together I’d be fine with it, other people's words wouldn’t matter to me. However I don’t want all of that aspect if I’m not getting the perks of being with you.”

“For the record I think you’re brilliant without all these things in between us.”

“Of course you do,” you quipped, making him laugh, “Any luck with the A.I.?”

“They’re still putting up a fight but Oscorp has decided to fund me after all since they’ve calmed somewhat. Everything is signed and sealed officially. I’m in full control since Norman wants to focus on some enhancement serum for the military. It was embarrassing having to state my case with his kid in attendance.”

“What was so embarrassing?” You asked, getting up to clean yourself off, the moment more than passed.

He sighed, “More so I had to convince the little prince. Somehow more smug than his father despite not doing a damned thing. I don’t think he’s even graduated high school yet... ‘He’ll take over one day. It's good for him to learn the ropes’. Everything I’ve done, to have to do that… an immature teenager that doesn’t know a thing being the deciding factor in my life’s work.”

“The projects funded,” you reminded him, “That’s all that matters, right? And you have all the power. No more little Osborn to deal with ever again.”

“Yes,” he agreed, his tone losing some anger, “I suppose you’re right.”

“I’m so proud of you, Otto.”

“Oh, I… Really?”

“Yeah! Maybe it didn’t happen like you’d hope but you finally got there. In a couple short years you’re going to make the world a better place.”

“Thank you, YN. It means a lot.”

“Anytime, handsome.”

-

We’re sorry…

With great regret…

The standards haven’t been met…

Okay, so you hadn’t been expecting a constant stream of acceptances. That simply wasn’t feasible. However, you definitely didn’t expect letter after letter of rejection. You were bright as hell with the record to show it many times over. There had been an assumption that there would be a small fight for your attention. Then again there was always brighter or, possibly, you had to face you weren’t as bright as you thought.

Now you stood with the last two letters. Roxxon and Oscorp internships, both paid well, surprisingly, but at this rate your hope had diminished.

With a sigh you opened Roxxon’s letter first.

We can’t wait to welcome you into our program!

Pride pushed through you. It was difficult to get in with them. Maybe you did have some worth after all.

Next you tore into the letter from Oscorp.

We’re sorry to inform…

You groaned.

…that the internships in California have all been filled. However the program in New York would love to accept you.

How you managed to snag the attention of two of the more prestigious internships was beyond you at this point. Now you had to weigh your options.

Roxxon paid more, you’d have to go to Arizona, deal with the desert and a more barren town, and be responsible for your own lodging. Though at the end of the day you knew they cared more about the oil side of their industry.

Oscorp would handle lodging which meant a cut in pay, you could visit the city a couple times depending on where they placed you, and they specialized in the more technical sides of the field and could help you get to know the people you needed to begin networking.

It really was a no brainer.

But Otto…

Fine, maybe you were all talk when it came to him, but he was easy to toy with. How could you resist? But you couldn’t let your heart force you to cower away from something that would be ultimately beneficial. New York would be extremely close but it was a big state and it wasn’t even a guarantee you’d end up in Manhattan.

-

The fact that you had to immediately go from the last class of this year to the airport wasn’t the best. Then you had to go from the airport to the office because of course the flight couldn’t have been booked any earlier. It was all a mess. You took time to make yourself as presentable as possible in the bathroom.

“Where are you heading, stranger?”

A woman in a similar position of preening asked, looking at you in the mirror as she did her make up.

“An Oscorp office,” you answered mindlessly.

“We can go there together!” She said looking at you excitedly.

“No way!” You mostly felt lucky you wouldn’t be the only person having to find a place to ditch a suitcase. “You’re an intern too?”

“Yeah! I wonder if we’ll get placed with the same person. It would be nice to know someone.”

“If anything we’ll at least be in the same apartment building.”

You decided to take the cab together. She told you that she’d originally been from Midtown, but decided to go to college in Georgia. The internship was a way to learn but also a reason to come back home for a while and visit on the free days, which extended to you if you wanted to go with. Naomi seemed like a really sweet girl all in all.

At the office, the secretary took pity and allowed you to leave the suitcases at the corner of her desk, before giving you the envelopes with your room keys. Different roommates but on the same floor at least.

Luckily today was an introduction and a meeting with the person you’d be working under.

“Naomi Pearson and YN LN?” An older man called out.

She gave you a happy glance before joining you to him.

“I’m Dr. Josiah Williams. It’s a pleasure to be working with you both.” He shook your hands, “We actually have an exciting project going for us girls.”

“What is it?” Naomi asked curiously.

“Lab equipment!”

Her face dropped and you couldn’t help a laugh at her expense. “Oh.”

“We’ll be glad to help Dr. Williams.”

The following morning you and Naomi waited in the hall to Williams’ lab. He was the late type noted. When he finally rolled around he gave both of you swiping cards that would only grant you access to the lab when it was time for you to work.

The lab was filled with glass cases of his proudest builds. Some of them really were magnificent but you focused on the pin board with mock ups you were more than familiar with, the pages copies that were barren of the personalization you were used to.

The universe had to be fucking with you at this point.

“YN? Are you familiar with these?” Williams asked, noticing your interest.

“I… Yes. Dr. Octavius is a family friend, he told us about them over dinner a while ago. Every aspect of this project is enthusiastic.”

“Splendid. I didn’t know there would be a personal connection. I’m sure he’ll be glad to hear a familiar personality is going to be working with him.” Not when you’re supposed to be far off in Arizona he wasn’t. “But you can tell him on your own time. Man is stubborn as all hell and frustrated with me. I had to change some components. That’s where you have to be firm, girls. This is our side of expertise, we know it best. They’re liable to maim themselves seriously if we let them have their way.”

He motioned for you to follow him to a mostly built tentacle.

“Luckily for the two of you, I hate working with others, but have a fondness for teaching new blood. You guys aren’t so set in your ways. So that means you’ll have a lot of work ahead of you. I think we’ll focus on this aspect of the project, more room for error here. The reactor is going to rely on more experienced hands, it’s supposed to handle the force of a sun I’m told. But these,” He patted the tentacle, “a good old fashioned robot. I waited for you guys to get here before I ran the first test. Stay a little far. These kids are all going to have their own A.I. and I’m not sure how it will react to stimuli for the first time. The miniatures were… well just don’t get too close for this initial wake.”

A few clicks on his computer had the arm- you really needed to learn the technical term if this was your work- come to life.

“Now I decided to fit it with red and white LEDs, he’s going to have a component on his neck and if it breaks, well, red means they’re not connected correctly and need instant removal. If they’re red during any of these trials, turn them off instantly. YN I’m sure you understand why. Naomi I need you to trust me on this. They’re fast, dangerous, and the software definitely needs tweaking.”

Though in complete opposite of his warning the claw clicked experimentally, as if getting used to the movement before looking around. Instantly it settled on you, moving toward you curiously.

“May I?” You asked Williams, raising your hand toward the arm.

“It seems to be okay,” he allowed, nodding his head.

You pet the head of the arm much like you would the head of a dog. The arm made a whirring sound before wrapping around your arm tightly.

“Ouch. Buddy, you gotta loosen up,” you told it, to which it complied, “Aw, you’re not so bad, huh?”

Part of you had wished Otto was here. He deserved to see his creation in action. The arm let go of you to look at Naomi next. She was visibly not okay with it but coping.

“Are you all right?”

“They’re a little like snakes, small fear I can get over it.”

Giving a seemingly offended hiss at her discomfort the arm returned to you, playing with a piece of hair.

“Well, Naomi, why don’t you and I start building another and YN can run diagnostics and make a report for this one?”

Manning the computer you started to run the test. How well it would listen and carry out orders. When it started anticipating your request. The slight flicker of red when you reprimanded it for playing with your hair instead of doing its task. You knew it should have been turned off but you couldn’t help wanting to work past it.

“Come on. The sooner we do this the faster we can finish you and your siblings, see?” You pointed to Williams and Naomi working on the wiring. “Don’t you want the rest of them to get built too? Then Dr. Octavius can come! He’s kinda like your dad, I’d say, don’t you want to meet him?” You bargained with it.

The arm sagged a bit which caused a smile but ultimately started doing as it was told. You liked that it seemed to have something of a personality. Would the others be the same or their own? Time would tell.

You gave the arm a final pet before shutting it off for the day. It might have been strange but you really did have a growing bud of fondness for the machine.

-

It would be a lie to say you didn’t have a bad habit of double checking Naomi’s work. Not that she was bad at her job at all. Really she was amazing, but you knew what they were capable of and who they’d be connected to. Love wouldn’t allow you to let anything slide through the cracks. Not if you could do something to fix it.

He still had yet to know…

Well he hadn’t called either, so it wasn’t exactly your fault.

Would he still let you work on his project if he had?

The thought made you frown.

Even without the connection to him, you loved this project. Each of the actuators that had been built together so far had come into their own. One was sweet enough, still very much an excitable puppy. Two was a bit motherly, often giving you drinks and snacks that were within reach. Three had a violent streak and left you a small scar to remember it but you couldn’t be angry, being thrusted into consciousness was terrifying. Let alone when it was on someone’s whim. Still you apologized profusely for having to strap it down for the initial wake. Eventually you got it to calm though. Would have been an embarrassing thing to put it on for the presentation and it act mad throughout.

It was a strange little friendship forged with these three, though often they would gang up on you and do as they pleased when they were all up together. You had to figure out how to work those bugs away. They had to listen perfectly.

“Come with me this weekend?”

“Where?” You hummed, fixing some mangled wiring.

“Home!” She sighed, “You’ve done nothing but stay in this lab since we got here and you already agreed to come with me last week.”

“I’ll go next week.”

“That’s what you said nearly a month ago!”

You laughed at that, “Okay okay. I’ll stop disappointing you. Remind me. Where’s Midtown anyway?”

“Manhattan.”

“Ah.”

“An issue?”

“Nope! Why would there be an issue?”

Quickly the two of you locked up the lab. Making sure everything was settled before all but running to the intern apartment building. Haphazardly you stuffed a duffel bag with a couple clothes and things that were essential daily. Luckily it would be a three day weekend so there wouldn’t be much of a rush to get back as there usually was for her. Grabbing the last train of the night the two of you settled in for the ride.

Once you were at your destination two of her friends greeted both of you. They were equally as sweet as she had been. Later you were introduced to the guy they roomed with. All were excited to see if they could get you to meet anyone since you hardly interacted with any of the other interns.

“I don’t know… I don’t really…”

“It could be fun!” Stephanie persuaded, “We only get to fuck up like this once!”

“I’ll think about it.” Your phone rang and made you perk up. “I got to take this.”

Allisa looked at you in curiosity, observing your reaction, “Is that why you won’t go out looking?”

“Maybe,” you offered, getting up to walk out into the hallway. “Hello?”

“Aw of course she has a boyfriend!” Rudy exclaimed, loudly.

“Who’s that?” Otto asked quickly.

“Down boy, it’s nobody.”

“Hey! I resent that new girl! All you know I’m the man of your dreams.”

“Oh she’s in trouble,” the three women chorused at the obvious interest from the person that had called.

“I thought you didn’t want to pursue this, you can’t get mad,” you said, closing the door, “If I’m with someone.”

“I…” he sighed, “You’re right. I apologize. I wanted to check in with you, it’s been a long time.”

“I know, maybe…” Visiting wouldn’t end well would it? “Maybe we can start a weekly call? Keep tabs with each other.”

“That would be good. How’s Arizona treating you?”

You should tell him. “It didn’t work out.”

“What? Why didn’t it?”

“Because I never exactly accepted their offer.”

“You had said-“

“I… I was nervous about it. Oscorp liked me and it was more suited to things I wanted to be a part of. I’ve been in Albany for the last almost two months.”

“You lied to me? You’ve been so close this whole…”

“Closer than you’d think…”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“I had no control of it,” you stressed, “You know that right? I was stationed with Dr. Williams and the second I realized it I should have said something but after everything I wasn’t sure you’d allow it…”

“They’re letting someone that hasn’t even completed their studies work on my machine?” He bursted, loudly.

“Y-you’re angry about that?”

“Hell no, jealous. You know how much grunt work I had to do for you to take off running with this? No, darling girl, I trust you with my life, it just isn't fair.”

“But are you angry with me?” You asked for confirmation.

He thought about it for a moment, “Slightly. I wish you hadn’t lied about where you were, but I understand… It’s just the way it is.”

“Otto, don’t get me wrong I’d love to see you. I… I miss you,” you added quietly before hurrying to say, “Maybe you could visit the lab? The actuators would love to meet you.”

“I’d like that,” he agreed, “After that maybe we could go to dinner? You must have been stuck in that lab for too long. It’s not good for you to start getting into the habit.”

“You’re trying to convince me to get out of the lab?” You teased lightly. “What has the world come to?”

“Let me spend some time with you, YN?”

“…How?”

“Friends,” he stated simply, understanding where you were heading.

You held back the disappointed groan. Wanting nothing more than to step off this ledge with him. “I can always make time for you.”

“Glad we can work something out. So, what do you and your friends have planned this weekend?”

“They want to take me around town to meet someone,” you sighed, “Naomi, she’s working on the actuators too, let it spill that I haven’t looked for company since we got here. And they’re making a fuss.”

“Do you want company?”

“Only if it’s yours,” you answered honestly, “While I’m caught up with you it wouldn’t be fair to get anyone else’s hopes up. Then considering how the last one night stand went I’m not eager to try again.”

“I’m really sorry, darling.”

“What are you sorry about? You never intended on being the person I…” Love wanted to come out so naturally. Easily. “I don’t want you to be sorry about this. Feeling this for you is nice all things considered. Caring about you isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever done. It's lovely actually, I hadn’t been sure if I was capable of it.”

“You know I care about you?” He asked quietly.

“Do I?” You challenged, “I’ll say this isn’t my favorite way it’s been shown.”

“Do you think I like this? If things had happened differently… it wouldn’t have been a thought. I wouldn’t have wasted a second.”

“But it’s not, Otto. This is the chance we get. The only one for us. You’re letting every second pass over something I don’t mind at all. You alone are the reason we struggle so much. Let go of it. We want this, but we can’t have it until you allow it.”

“Your friends are waiting for you,” he pointed out, “You should join them.”

“Don’t pull away…”

“This time again next week?”

You gave a dejected sigh, “Sure, Otto.”

Hanging up you walked back into the apartment.

“How’d it go?” Rudy asked, “Do my prospects look good?”

“Ugh don’t start, I’m tired of men.”

“Noted. Try again on a later date.”

“Why are we hating men today?” Alissa asked, poking her head in from the kitchen. “I don’t need any reasons. I’d just like to know yours.”

“This guy I’m talking? to… He doesn’t want a relationship or anything else with me because he thinks I’m too young. Which is fine and understandable, but sometimes he makes like he’ll budge and my hopes get crushed when it’s the same old.”

“Cut him off!” Stephanie yelled from the kitchen, “You’re too pretty to let an old man toy with your head.”

“No! This is the first I’ve heard of you're not shutting it down now!” Naomi looked at you, “How do you feel about him? Do you love him?” She asked, the obvious romantic in the room.

“I… it almost slipped out a few times, but saying it feels too real with the way he’s been, what's the point of confessing it? I’m sure he knows without all the words,” you admitted. “Speaking it is too much.”

“I agree with Steph,” Ruby nodded, “Not trying to swoop in with any intentions, I’ve just never been a fan of the younger older thing. Why stop your life? You’re young there’s so much to do! Why pump the brakes for someone that’s years away from going bye bye.”

Alissa punched his arm. “You’re such an insensitive jerk at times. She just said she loved him, that last point was unnecessary.”

“What I can’t speak now?” He asked, rubbing his arm.

“You can speak, but don’t be a fucking dick about it. Hard I know.”

“He’s not that old!” You defended Otto, “He’s only 47!”

Stephanie made a sound of disgust. “He’s eight years from being a senior citizen! What the hell does he want with you? He should find himself some grandma and settle down. Call it a day.”

“Aren’t you listening! He doesn’t want to be with her because of that! I’m taking this as a green flag and am firmly in his favor.” Naomi grabbed your arm, “Tell me everything about him. Does he have nice eyes? You look like someone that likes nice eyes.”

“Of course the old man lover thinks it’s fine,” Stephanie scoffed.

“Hey! I wouldn’t date someone older than me just yet. I’m not mature enough. They’ll steamroll me. They’ve got everything all figured out and I’m just starting to learn myself. But YN is mature! And if anything I trust her judgement.”

“Okay that’s two on his side, one on mine. What about you Alissa?”

“I think it’s a good sign,” twin groans from the opposing team sounded, “What? Would you prefer she gets with someone that fetishized this age gap of theirs? He’s thinking about her. He wants what’s best for her and I’m assuming he feels the same if he keeps entertaining the idea, it’s just a difficult position to be in. If anything, that little jealous streak earlier was confirmation that he can’t handle her with anyone else.”

You laughed, “Well we’re all tied up! Thanks guys, you were absolutely no help at all.”

“But you know what’s great to sooth these lovers' wounds? Alcohol. You’re going out tomorrow and forgetting all about him for a while,” Alissa stated.

True to her word the group went around town, bar to bar from the start the afternoon. It was dark when you made your way to the latest one. The girls ran to take over the empty stage and picked out a song to perform. Ruby’s flirting dropped to playful now that he knew where your head was, but you sported his coat once he noticed you were cold and he informed you he needed his girl to know he was here for anything. For the fun of it you decided to play around too. What harm would come of it?

You kissed his cheek, furthering the game, “Do you wanna buy my friends and I a couple rounds, pretty boy?”

“What’s in it for me?” He asked, allowing you to pull him over to the counter.

“I might go home with ya.”

“For that little?”

You sent him a wink, a soft smirk playing on your lips.

While he was busy ordering the next drinks, the ones it was his turn to buy anyway, you couldn’t help but turn your head toward a familiar scent. The blood left your face when you noticed it was your particular cigar smoker that was shooting daggers back at you, the soft grin you had fading quickly as if you were caught doing something wrong. Though the shock wasn’t long lived as a woman came up to him, giving his bicep a soft squeeze in greeting. This time it was your turn to return the glare preferring that over the hurt you felt showing.

“Here’s yours,” Ruby said, moving to hand it over.

Your gaze leaving Otto’s you blinked up at Ruby sweetly, “You wanna give it to me?”

“Y-yeah,” he nodded enthusiastically. Raising the shot glass to your lips he watched as you downed it, making sure to keep your eyes on him. “Whoa…” He blushed lightly as you licked your lip of a stray drop of alcohol.

You glanced at him with some humor at the realization that he was all talk. It was cruel to be playing with Ruby this way but you didn’t want to think of the disappointment Otto had caused. All that to go off with some random woman? After everything? It hurt.

“Dance with me Rudy?” You pouted up at him.

“Anything my girl wants.”

He quickly went to set down the drinks before pulling you to a small dance floor. A couple times you caught Otto’s glare, he was attempting to keep a conversation but his eyes kept focusing on this man you were allowing to grope at you while you danced.

Eventually you grew tired and walked back to the bar on his side. You ordered water and not so accidentally knocked his scotch down when you pulled back your hand. If his look could have killed.

“I’m so sorry, sir, let me help you clean it up,” you dabbed his chest unnecessarily hard with a couple napkins.

He grabbed your wrist, grip firm as could be, “I’ve got it. Thank you.”

“Messy girls like that,” his companion started.

“Don’t talk about her like that,” he quickly shut it down.

You returned to your group, ditching Ruby’s jacket on a chair. “I need to get air.”

“I’ll come,” Rudy quickly offered.

“No, I'm okay. I have a bit of a headache. Have fun with the rest of them.”

He looked disappointed but didn’t make a move to follow you out. Taking a deep breath, you walked outside and picked a direction to start walking in. Not long after you heard the door swing open and shut once more. Quick footsteps followed after you as you felt the familiar prickle of being watched that had been there all night. It felt a little more threatening now that you were all alone. You resisted the urge to look back.

After a couple streets you felt an arm wrap around your waist and pull you into an alley.

“Weren’t you with someone, Octavius?” You spat out angrily. “How could you do that?”

“You insolent little girl. You’ve got some nerve pu-“

“I’ve got some nerve? I wasn’t the one with a date after claiming to care last night!”

“Could have fooled me with that pathetic puppy at your heels.”

“He’s a friend! We were messing around until I saw the two of you! I just told them all that I loved you last night for this? I said it out loud for once. To see you with someone else? What is burying yourself in someone else a way to forget me? Am I so horrible to you?”

He kissed you, stopping any more points you would make. You hated that you melted into him so easily, even with how betrayed you felt. It felt good after so long, even with how rough the kiss was and the way his teeth were biting at your lip. Soon you managed to clear your head and push him away, he instantly pulled away from you.

“You have someone waiting for you!”

“She was an investor. I was trying to get us more funding, because the people building my god damn actuators keep making more demands and are running me dry. If someone hadn’t been such a damn brat I would have succeeded.”

Otto shoved you against the wall placing a hand on either side of your face and leaning down, caging you in.

“An investor? In a place like that?” You scoffed.

“You reek of that cheap shit he wears,” he said angrily, his lips falling to that spot he knew well turned you to putty.

Any argument you wanted to say dropped as he sucked a bruise onto your neck. A clear show of possession to anyone that saw it. You closed your eyes, leaning your head against the wall as your breath came in soft pants. His knee shoved it’s way between your legs.

“Everytime smelling like someone else,” He shook his head, “I hate the idea of you being anyone else’s.”

“It’ll happen eventually…”

“No. It won’t.” He worked your hips on his thigh.

“Otto…” you moaned, “I can’t do this again. It’ll break me.”

“I love you. I thought I could stand in the sidelines and be satisfied with it but tonight proved different. I’m not doing this again. I refuse. Everytime he so much as looked at you I wanted to wring his neck.”

It took all of your willpower, but you stilled his hands. “Otto. We can’t.”

His anger dissipated as he looked you in the eye. “I thought about what you said all night. Time is passing us by… If you’re sure about this, then I am too.”

“You’re mine?”

“If you’ll have me.”

“Take me home, Otto?”

“I’m far too impatient for that, my love. Do you know how much I had to hold back minutes ago?”

You stood on the tips of your toes to give him a kiss. The idea that you’d get to have them as you pleased now making you feel more drunk than the alcohol ever could. This was happening fast but you’d held each other at arms length for so long.

“I’ve never considered myself a jealous man, guess you bring it out in me,” he spoke, pressing kisses to your shoulder as his hand slipped into your pants. He groaned as he felt how wet you already were. “That’s my girl.”

“If I knew…” you didn’t get to finish the thought as Otto pushed a finger in. You gripped his coat tightly, biting down on your lip to keep in your moans as he added another soon after thrusting his fingers in slowly.

“Why don’t you tell me what you were thinking about that night? I’ll make it up to you.”

“How,” you bucked your hips against his hand as he curled his fingers, “How lovely you’d look with your face between my thighs.”

“We can make that happen.” He pulled his fingers away from you, chuckling softly at the whimper you let out. “I’ll take care of you, be patient.”

Otto kissed down your body, sinking down to his knees. He unfastened your pants and helped pull them off, you looked nervously to the opening of the alley. Next he tugged off your underwear, pocketing them for now. Bringing your left leg up, he let it rest on his shoulder. Kissing the inside of your thigh he looked up at you, noticing you were looking anywhere but him and your nails were digging into your hands.

“There’s nothing to be nervous about.”

“No one’s ever…”

“It’s just me, hm? No one to be shy with,” He took your hands and placed a kiss on the knuckles, winking playfully at you, “Pull at my hair if you need something to ground yourself with, I go for it, and keep those pretty eyes on me. Alright?”

Doing as he said, you threaded your hands into his hair and gave a hard pull. You watched as he licked a broad swipe along your pussy. The groan he let out signaling this was just as much for him as it was for you. Bringing your other leg to his shoulder he didn’t waste another moment burying his face into your warmth.

You yelped at the sudden loss of balance but were held firm in his grip. There would be bruises later from how hard he was holding you, but you couldn’t mind it. His eyes were dark as he drank in every small reaction you gave, quickly figuring out the fastest way to coax out those moans you were trying to keep in. Mouth shifting to your clit, he plunged three fingers into you without warning, so much thicker and pushing deeper than yours could. The brick was unforgiving as you arched your back closer and squeezed your thighs tight around his head.

Your hips ground against Otto’s face. He chuckled against you but kept the pace that was making you begin to clamp down on his fingers. His teeth bit down gently on your clit adding a soft mix of pain into your pleasure. Your body seized keeping him tight in your grasp before relaxing against him again. Otto wasn’t in any rush licking the mess clean until your legs kicked weakly at his back and hands pushed his head away from your overstimulated core. You would have wanted to wipe the smug smirk off his face if you were in another headspace. Carefully, he let down your legs.

“Was that what you needed?” He asked as he stood, a teasing glint in his eye as he ran a hand across his mouth.

You nodded, pulling him close by the belt loops. “More.”

“Greedy girl, aren’t you?”

“Guess you bring it out in me.”

Undoing his belt, you pushed his pants and boxers down just enough to get his hard cock out. Intimidating had been the right thought, thicker than you ever had and a little more than average. It was heavy in your hand as you gave it experimental pumps, trying to gauge how he preferred to be touched. Otto gave a shallow thrust into your hand and a soft moan when you did it just right for him. One vein along the side was begging for your attention. You licked your lips, fully intending on returning the favor before he stopped you short.

“Not tonight, my darling girl,” his thumb soothed your pouting bottom lip, “I want to feel you around me. May I?”

“Please.”

He crouched slightly to grab your thighs before pulling you up easily. Your head got dizzy with how big he was and how simple of a thing it was for him to move you as he wished. He brought your attention back to the matter at hand as he carefully pressed you against the wall so he could free a hand for a moment. Slowly he ran the head of his cock along the sleek that had been created, making sure to rub slow circles on your clit before bringing it down to dip the head into you for seconds before repeating the motion.

You whined, tugging at his hair. “Otto, I swear if you don’t f-“

He started pushing himself in. You closed your eyes feeling slight pain from the stretch of him, nails digging into his coat. Otto kissed your cheek in apology.

“You’ve got to relax, dear, it’s only a little more I promise.”

“There’s more?” You asked in disbelief.

“If you want to stop-“

“No!” You blushed at how loud it came out, but weren’t too embarrassed given the circumstance, “You’re just more than I’ve ever… Distract me, all I need. It’ll feel better.”

Eager to help you work your way through this initial pain, his mouth met yours and his thumb swirled your clit to help bring more pleasure. This time he worked himself in with shallow thrust adding a little more every so often, deciding all at once had been too eager when he remembered it had been a long while for you. Your body adjusted to the intrusion of him quickly after that. He couldn’t help but feel that light sprinkling of pride when he finally worked himself fully and you let out a lewd moan.

“So much better than I thought,” you whispered along his skin as you trailed your lips down to his neck. Biting and sucking the skin there while he let out quiet moans, making sure to leave a clear mark for any other investors. You tried to rock your hips, but there wasn’t much you could do in this position. “Stop holding back, Otto.”

Otto didn’t need to be told twice. In focusing on you, he left his pleasure on the back burner- not that he minded. Your head smacked lightly on the wall as he worked at a pace you both very vocally enjoyed. You couldn’t mind the way your head hit against the wall everytime he thrusted back in, but he seemed to as he moved the hand that wasn’t holding you to cradle the back of your head.

He looked down at where the two of you met, going faster as he watched how easily he pushed in now. “Taking me so well,” he groaned, giving you a quick messy kiss, “Tell me how it feels.”

For a while all you could manage was moans with the way he managed to rub and stroke that spot hidden away. “So good… just like that Otto…”

“You’re only this good of a girl for me, right?” He asked, the hand in your hair forcing you to look him in the eye.

You clenched tight around him, “Yes, fuck, only you sir.”

“I can't wait to have you in my bed. Ruined the one place where there was any peace, but you’ll make that up to me won’t you?”

“Mmm mhm,” you responded nodding, unable to get much of substance out while you were so close and getting promises that you’d feel this good again soon. Reaching a hand down you rubbed your clit, eager to spill onto him.

Otto kissed your neck as you rode out your high. Trying to keep the same pace, but he had been right about not lasting. The first time in nearly six years he’s lucky he even made it this far.

“I’m going to have to stop soon, dear,” he hissed as you constricted impossibly tight around him. “Fuck, you feel too good. I’m gonna-“

“Inside.” You wrapped your legs around his waist making sure he couldn’t get far. “Please Otto, inside.”

That spurred something in him, now taking the chance to be selfish in his pleasure knowing you were well taken care of. “Yeah? You wanna take every last drop of my cum like the good pet you are?”

“I need it. Please, fill me up.”

He didn’t need to much more, his hips pushing his cock as deep as it would go before shooting out thick spurts of warmth. The two of you shared hungry open mouth kisses until they turned sweet and chaste, coming down from your highs slowly. Carefully, he helped you back down onto your feet, giving a soft chuckle at the slight shake of your legs and steadied you with his hands at your hips.

You tucked him back away into his pants.

“I never imagined it like this,” he sighed as you redid his belt, “I’m sorry I was so…”

“I only wanted you. Where it was was hardly of any consequence.” Your hands rubbed his chest soothingly. “It was perfect.”

He knelt down, grabbing your pants to help you into them. Standing back up, he shed his coat and placed it around your shoulders to protect you from the cool air. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, “Let’s get you back home, hm?”

“Your bed is so comfortable,” you sighed happily at the prospect of getting to sleep in it soon, letting him lead you back out of the alley with his arm wrapped around your waist.

“It is,” he agreed with a soft chuckle, “but you’re letting me clean you up first and get you in some new clothes.”

“Oh, you’re just trying to get another peek,” you teased him.

“Would I really need any pretense?” He asked, looking down at you with amusement.

“What are you trying to say, Octavius?” You lightly smacked his arm.

Chapter Five

[beardrabbles]

invitation.

characters: GN!reader, claude, mentions of GN!byleth

warnings: none

word count: 2,814

notes: posted this on ao3 ages ago and totally forgot to post it here too :’) got into the fandom late, like alwaaaays! but i have an enormous claude / golden deer bias and wanted to write some fluff with him.

You forgot sometimes that this peaceful spot tucked between the trees wasn’t yours alone. You shared it with another from time to time, but it had been so long since the last time you both stepped foot in the clearing that it startled you to hear footfalls crunching at the grass behind you. Pushing yourself up halfway, eyes blinking blearily, you spotted the richly dressed prince with his hands planted on his hips.

“Napping without me?” Claude clicked his tongue, and you quickly replied with a roll of your eyes.

“I can’t nap here on my own?” You fell back again, letting the soft grass cushion you. A soft, content sigh escaped through your nose as the sweetest of breezes barely brushed your skin. It smelled of flowers and damp leaves, dense soil and a distant storm. There was no zing of hot iron or blood, and it was a relief.

“I thought it was our thing.  .  .”

You felt him sit beside you, taking up his usual position to your left. The tiniest flutter tickled the inside of your ribs, his nearness nearly making your head spin. “Before I came along, it was just your thing, remember?”

“Well, yeah, but I like it better this way.” Claude leaned back on his hands, eyes up towards the greying sky. It had taken fighting a war to bring back their usual glimmer, but it was there in full. Bright, hopeful, determined. Laying there, gazing up at the unsuspecting prince, it was almost as if you were looking at the man from five years ago — the cunning, clever and sometimes troublesome man that you had fallen head-over-heels for and had continued to painfully pine for.

“Me too.” You dared to smile, his gaze shifting to you. Adoring him hurt, but no amount of hurt would have you appreciating his presence any less.

Claude returned the smile, and the gesture sent your heart slamming against your chest. But just as quickly as it came, the smile faded. “I spoke to Byleth.”

You sat up in an instant, concern etched into your face. You were aware that he had gone to meet them, but he had failed to tell you why. You equally failed to push the subject, as it wasn’t your place to disrespect a man in his position. Curious as you might have been, you assumed it was best not to ask and only hope that he trusted you enough to confide in you later. Seemed you were right, though you acknowledged to yourself that it was a rare thing.

“How did it go?”

“They’re disappointed I won’t be here for the coronation. I can’t blame them. After everything we’ve been through together, I should be here for them. I want to hope they understands. They always have.” He exhaled sharply. “But, hey, I got to see them smile again! I think as long as they’re here, Fódlan will be in good hands. If they keeps smiling, if they keep breaking down the walls that were built up, I can go home and do my part there. I trust them.”

You shifted, feeling uncomfortable in your envy.

“So they’re not coming with you to Almyra?” You wondered. Claude shook his head.

“No, and I didn’t want to ask. Fódlan needs to be taken care of. It needs a parent that will hold its hand and lead it in the right direction. It’s gonna stumble around like an infant walking for the first time, but that’s why they’re the best person to lead. They’ll know what to say and do to help this little baby along.”

You screwed up your face and nudged him with your shoulder.

“You really like talking about babies.” You pointed out. Claude’s cheeks and the tips of his ears darkened a fraction, but he dismissed it with a hearty chuckle.

“I guess I do. I wonder why that is.” He trailed off, voice soft but nowhere near as confused as his words would have lead you to believe. You had long ago resigned yourself to never truly understanding him, so you shrugged. Trying to pick through his mind was like attempting a hedge maze without a map.

“Does that mean you’re going to be heading back soon?”

“I can’t stay for long. There’s so much I need to do if I’m going to see things through, but there’s something important I need to do here before I can go home.” There was sharpness to his eyes that you recognized and deeply adored. He was planning something, and you felt your curiosity rise again.

“What is it? Can I help?” You were always so quick to offer him aid. Usually, he gently denied it, stating time and time again that most of his schemes were for his mind alone. Things often worked out for the better that way. The fewer people that knew, the less chance they could commandeer the plan or ruin it. Yet you still asked just in case he needed you.

“Maybe. Before that, can I ask you something?”

You frowned. “Of course. You can ask me anything, you know that.”

“You’ve been saying that since we met. Is it really true?” Claude smirked and raised a single brow, only for you to shove him harmlessly.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” You eyed him for a moment, worry mounting. “Was that what you wanted to ask me?”

The prince shook his head, as if he were getting off track. “No. I wanted to know where you plan to go. What are your plans for the future?”

“Oh! Oh.” You frowned when the sudden realization that you had no plans slammed into you. “I don’t.  .  . know. I haven’t thought about it. I’ve been so busy supporting everyone else, doing what I can for them, that I don’t know what to do with myself. Everyone’s grown up. They’re all doing their own thing, starting their own lives. No one needs me anymore.”

“That’s not true.” Claude’s voice was firm in your ear, and his expression was set to match. You smiled meekly.

“I grew up with all of you, but it felt like my purpose was to help you all find yours. Not that I really think I’m capable of being that helpful, but I never took the time to think about myself. I was too worried about you all reaching your dreams that I didn’t have one. I don’t have one.” You amended the last part quickly because it was blatantly clear to you that you had no direction to go in.

“There has to be something you want.” Claude pushed. You laughed.

“At the risk of repeating myself, I want what you want. I want you to succeed.” You opened your mouth again, but were quick to clamp them shut when another thought arose. I want to be with you.

It was lovely to imagine, but you had lived with the fact that any future with him was left solely to your imagination. You met him as an heir, and you knew him now as a prince. The differences in your status was vast and hard to ignore. Claude had his mind set on making those differences unimportant, but you doubted that he could find room in his heart for you. He had a country to take care of and love, not to mention you two had been friends since the start of your time at the academy. Too much time had passed since then, and while your feelings had grown deeper and more troublesome, you were sure he had none to begin with. No, as students, he had been too preoccupied with tormenting you. Teasing, poking, taking up your time with nonsense and rarely giving you a moment to yourself.

Despite him being a brat at times, you loved him. And even if he didn’t reciprocate, you were grateful to have known him at all.

“So you’re not bound to Fódlan?” His voice shook you from your thoughts.

“What?”

“Do you have any obligations here in Fódlan?” His gaze was so intently set on you that it made you squirm, the feeling ten times worse since coming out of your own head.

“No, not that I can think of.” You couldn’t recall making any promises.

“Right, so you could leave.” Claude hummed thoughtfully and got to his feet. Once upright, he dusted the grass from his clothes and offered you a hand. Confused, you took it and let him pull you into standing.

“I guess I could, but where would I even go? I don’t know anyone outside of Fódlan.” You felt something subtle was being said, you couldn’t catch on. Some days, you could. You had learned him just as he had learned you, but he was always several steps ahead. You could read him, but only the pages he allowed you to see. In this case, the pages were written on, but only in bits and pieces.

Claude gave you a pointed stare and a gentle, encouraging squeeze to your hand. When you failed to understand, he raised both eyebrows and pointed to himself. No words were needed. His gestures and odd line of questioning were like a clarifying slap to the face. You reeled, giving him a wide-eyed stare while sputtering idiotically.

“Wh——”

“That took you while. I was starting to worry I’d have to spell it out for you.” Claude put on a convincing pout. “Unless this is your weird way of telling me you don’t want to come with me.”

“No!” You leaped too soon, your eagerness prompting a smirk on the prince’s face. You fell silent again, worried that saying anything more might reveal all of what you had been trying to hide for over five years. “I’m not saying that.”

“What are you saying?” He purred cunningly, hand still holding tightly to yours. You didn’t resist when he to eased you closer, your heart screaming in your chest. Cheeks red and breaths shallow, you could hardly think. This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be happening.

I’m still napping, and this is just another stupid dream.

You swallowed hard and peered up at him. “I think I should be asking you that, Mr. Vague.”

“Ah-ah,” chided the cheeky man, “you’ll have to address me as Prince Vague now.”

You scoffed and gave him another shove. When your hand pressed to his shoulder, he trapped it there with his own. Even closer now, Claude lowered his head until your noses nearly touched. You sucked in a breath and found yourself unable to move away, attention trapped in his bright, beautiful eyes.

“You want to know what I’m asking you?” He lowered his voice, tone growing tender and warm. You nodded. “I’m asking if you’ll come home with me. I want you to meet my parents and my people, and I want them to meet you. I want them to love you as much as——”

He choked for a moment, a rare flicker of pure emotion startling him.

“As much as what?” You didn’t want to get your hopes up, but he was making it incredibly difficult not to.

Claude calmed himself with a shaky breath and tilted his chin down, lips barely ghosting the curve of your cheek. His eyes fluttered half closed, while a single lock of his dark hair tickled at your cheek. When you didn’t shy away, he spoke again in honeyed tones. “I want them to love you as much as I do.”

“You can’t mean that.” Your entire being felt numb with glee, but you couldn’t process his confession without a little doubt. He met your doubt with a chuckle, so you persisted. “Why me?”

“Why not you?” He nuzzled into your cheek, and you felt the compulsion to reach up and thread your fingers through his hair. You had done so many times before, letting the gentle touches calm him during his bad days, but there was new meaning behind it now. There was an honest love behind it as your dragged your fingers through the strands, pushing them back and away from his darling face.

“There were so many others.  .  .” So many people wanted his attention, his affection. You were but one in a thousand that longed for him.

“I didn’t care. I dreamed of many futures, and all of the best ones had you standing there beside me.” He muttered into you, the softest of kisses resting just under your eye.

“We argued so much.” You shuddered, warmth blooming in your cheeks.

“You kept me grounded. How can anyone expect to be a decent ruler if they’re always agreed with?” He countered. You huffed and tried to think of another argument.

“You used to tease me all the time.” You muttered.

“I’ll admit that was dumb of me, but it felt like the only way to get your attention.” His lips found the tip of your nose, and you couldn’t contain a snicker. “You looked so cute when you were embarrassed, especially when you wrinkled your nose. I couldn’t help it.”

“Why do I feel like you still can’t help it?” You tucked a lock of his hair behind his ear and let your fingers follow the path of his facial hair. He was putty in your hands, cheek pressing to your hand.

“It’s part of my charm.” Claude flashed his usual smile, then took a step back. The lack of closeness left you feeling a little colder, but the distance let you appreciate him fully. Tall, handsome, commanding. You were exceedingly proud of him, and you felt yourself falling for him all over again. But before you could think to speak, he started again. “You don’t have to answer me right away. I know this a lot to ask of you, so I want to give you the time you need. I’m leaving in two days. Meet me at the——”

You didn’t allow him to finish. Your heart was too full and on the verge of bursting, and it seemed silly to you that he didn’t know what your answer would be when he was so skilled at predicting you. Rather than let him wonder, you removed your hands from his and took his face between them. You gathered your courage, mustered with his help, and pulled him down for a soft but silencing kiss.

Claude wasn’t often rendered speechless, but he supposed he didn’t mind being put in his place if it meant your lips fitting against his as perfectly as they did. Unfortunately for him and the heat radiating throughout him, you didn’t let the kiss last long. He wanted to wrap you in his arms and crush you against his chest like he’d long to for years, but you parted from him too soon for his liking.

“Where are you going?” He took chase, but you placed your hand over his mouth. Claude stilled and arched a brow.

“I’ve had my answer for years, Claude. I’m with you in every possible way. But if I ask you a question, will you answer me honestly?” You uncovered his mouth, but his silence told you more than words would. “How long have you, uh.  .  .”

“Cared for you? Admired you? Wanted to kiss you the way you just kissed me?” Every question he posed in response to yours made your heart thud and your cheeks burn. “A long, long time.”

“Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“I was never given the chance.” He answered so surely that you wondered if he had those words prepared. You couldn’t pester him about it — too many things had gone horribly wrong during your time at the academy, and it didn’t make sense to plant seeds in dead soil. There would have been no guarantee that it would bloom and flourish, but with the land starting a slow recovery, you hoped that what you two started here would become lusher and more far-reaching than any forest in Fódlan.

“It’s alright.” You giggled giddily and granted him another kiss, this one to the corner of his lips. “We were given our chance, and you took it.”

“Does that mean you’re going home with me?” He asked.

“I told you——”

“I want to hear you say the words.” Claude softly pleaded. Weak for his doe eyes, you melted in his arms and relented.

“I’m going home with you, Claude. I want to meet your parents, and I want to get to know your people. And for as long as I’m there, for as long as you’ll have me, I want to get to know you better.”

A soft sigh tinged with relief escaped the man as his head came to rest on your shoulder. His grasp on you tightened, and you felt his heart beat against your chest.

“Thank you.”

You smiled and embraced him. “Don’t thank me. Just take me home.  .  .”

[navegandoaciegas]

Broken Wings

Pairing: Lee Bodecker x Reader

Summary: You’re a small town girl with big city dreams, set on leaving Knockemstiff and its sheriff behind for good. Lee would do anything to make sure you stay with him.

Warnings: smut, explicit language, consensual sex, slight breeding kink, unprotected vaginal sex, mentions of alcohol.

A/N: This is part 1. Part 2

I want to thank my baby @whateveriwant for your support, ily! I haven’t written anything in more than a month but it feels good to be back to it!!

Knockemstiff, 1957

The crisp air of the night hit your exposed legs when you swung them over the window sill, and a shiver ran down your spine as humidity seeped into your bones.

From your bedroom on the second floor, you could make out the shape of the Sheriff’s car hidden behind the line of trees near your father’s shed, and a bittersweet, faint smile spread on your painted lips. Fastening the clasp from the outside, you climbed down the drain pipes, savoring the thrill of it all one last time.

No more Knockestiff, sneaking out of your bedroom, shotgunning while he patrolled the streets, milkshakes and burgers propped on your things and Johnny Cash playing in the background, drowned by your giggles and his laughs. You wouldn’t get to call the sheriff yours anymore, and you would never spend another moment writhing in pleasure under his warm, soft body.

You loved Lee Bodecker in spite of everything he stood for, but not even the love of your life could keep you anchored to this town. Tomorrow you’d be far, far away, and God himself couldn’t stop you if he tried.

You’d promised your mother that you wouldn’t end up withering away with no chances and no future like she had. Like everyone who was touched by the curse of Knockemstiff did.

“Spread your wings and fly far, far away,” she’d hiccup between sobs each time you’d drag her limp body from the couch to her bed, the stench of alcohol and stale cigarettes oozing out of her skin, “my pretty little butterfly.”

Your mother would have sold her soul to the Devil to see you out of Knockemstiff.

A new beginning awaited you in New York. A job as a librarian, an apartment to share with one of your college girlfriends, a prospect, a future.

Hope, freedom, opportunities.

The pipe creaked under your weight, but you paid no mind to it. Moonshine would have knocked out cold anyone in the house by now.

Scurrying down the gravel road, you found Lee waiting for you, a smug smile on his clean shaven face and a brown paper bag in his arms.

“About damn time, dove. Been freezing my ass over here, waitin’ on ya.”

You flung yourself in his arms, knocking him back against the car’s hood, savoring the musky scent of his cologne one last time.

“Hello, Sheriff.”

His chest vibrated with a fond chuckle, and you looked up to him, trying to etch every line of his handsome face to your memory.

In another life, the adoration in his blue eyes would have changed your mind.

“Missed me?” he teased you, one arm snaking around your waist, holding you flush to his front. The other came up to your face, cradling your cheek in his palm.

You could feel his soft belly against you. His shirts fit tighter now than when you’d started dating, and his stomach was beginning to bulge over his belt buckle.

“More than you can imagine.” you sighed, offering him a weak smile.

Maybe he missed the melancholy in your voice, or maybe he’d made his peace with your mood swings long ago, because he didn’t comment on it, simply placing a soft kiss on your forehead and pushing you back, thrusting the bag in your arms.

“Let’s get inside dove. These streets ain’t gonna patrol ‘emselves.”

The inside of his car was always warm, and smelled like him.

He drove around while you fed him fries, and you talked until your mouths ran dry.

Guilt gripped your heart when he mentioned a future together.

You knew he’d picked a ring, voices spread fast in small towns. He wanted the white picket fence, a pretty housewife and kids.

You were selfish and cruel and revelled in his love and affection for months, knowing damn well you’d never give him what he desired most.

“You okay? You seem distracted.” he quipped, hand squeezing your thigh.

Your conscience screamed at you to talk to him, but your mouth stayed sealed. There were no words to make this easy on him, so you’d make it easier on yourself.

He’d hate you, at first, but he’d move on, find some other nice girl and settle down with her.

She’d be pretty, and good to him, and she’d love him for the rest of her days.

“I’m okay, you know me. My head’s always up ‘n the clouds. College,” you deepened your voice, mocking your father’s words, “makes ‘m kids airheads.”

His eyes crinkled when he laughed. You’d miss the sound.

“I know, my little dove’s always flying higher than the rest of this shitty town.”

It was bitter, really, that the one you loved the most was what kept you chained to the ground, where you didn’t belong.

You were meant for the sky, his little dove, your mother’s butterfly.

Spread your wings, you reminded yourself, and fly far, far away.

-

You swore time flew by faster when you spent it with Lee, and minutes melted into hours, slipping through your fingers.

You wished you had more.

When he pulled over to an all too familiar clearing in the woods, your body acted on its own accord, and you climbed in the back seat like you’d done most nights for months.

Those trees had seen you in all states of undress, fucked in the car or on the hood, on your knees, on your back, on your stomach, with his cock down your throat or in your cunt, his face between your legs or on the crook of your neck.

Everything made you melancholic, everything reminded you about what you were about to give up.

It was selfish, but you’d allow yourself to forget all about the future for the moment being.

Just you and Lee, just a moment longer before reality would inevitably hit you like a bucket of iced water.

You and the love of your life that you’d betray once morning came.

But in the dark, underneath the stars and the moon, he was still yours, and you were his.

“You’re so fuckin’ beautiful baby, God, I’m the luckiest man in the whole world.”

You ignored the guilt once again, and straddled his lap. Grabbing him by his tie, you slanted your mouth against his. He parted his lips with a sigh, resting his back against the seat.

“Fuck, dove, you’re so good to me.” he mumbled, calloused hands roaming over your body.

A moan escaped your lips when his strained cock rubbed against your flimsy undergarments, and you arched your back, seeking more friction to soothe your aching core.

Warmth pooled in your lower belly, and slick gathered in your panties.

You ran your fingers through his hair, and pulled him impossibly close to feel everything, his warmth and his scent, his soft body and his rough hands.

Teeth clattering, bruising touches, heaving chests. The windows were getting fogged up by your hot breaths, and the metal creaked and clattered under your weights.

Desperation and arousal clouded your mind, and you looked at him through half lidded eyes, hoping he couldn’t read into your soul.

“Lee, baby, I need to feel you, I need you inside me,” you whined, unbuttoning his shirt and tugging on his belt impatiently.

You were desperate to feel his cock inside you, to have his hands leave bruises and his mouth leave marks on your skin one last time. Be his, be one in the flesh, one last time.

“So eager, you’d think I was Paul Newman or somethin’,” he chuckled, kneading the flesh of your ass.

“Much better than Newman, Brando or whatever they worship in Hollywood now.” you panted through sloppy kisses, hand dipping inside his briefs, his weight heavy and hot against your palm.

He hissed through his teeth, eyes rolling to the back of his brain. “What are you butterin’ me up for, dove?”

A beautiful moan escaped his lips when you doubled your efforts, wrist twisting around the velvety skin of his shaft, working his sensitive tip.

“I don’t need flattery to get me anythin’ baby, just these hands and lips.”

You popped your lips to emphasize your point, and let your tongue run along his bottom lip, taking it between yours and sucking on it.

He lifted your shirt with a swift motion, and the growl that he let out when he didn’t find any bra sent a thrill through you, straight to your throbbing core.

He groped your tits, squeezing until the line between pleasure and pain became too blurred to distinguish. You gasped when he rolled and pinched your nipples between his fingers, and mewled when his mouth closed down on one of them.

His tongue swirled around the stiff bud, teeth barely grazing the delicate skin.

A shiver ran down your spine when you felt his hot breath against your neck, and in a blur you found yourself laying on your back, his body caging you in.

“Don’t forget about this pussy, baby, I’d do anything for it.”

Your giggles turned to cries once his hand found its way between your legs, his name falling from your lips like a prayer while he caressed the hair on your mound.

He beamed proudly, feeling the wet patch on your undergarments, and dipped in your folds, spreading the slick around your entrance, rubbing your clit with his thumb.

His lips tasted like candy and strawberry milkshake, and you savored them as long as you could while your tongue intertwined with his.

You laughed when he knocked his head on the door, and then his knees on the floorboard.

“Can’t wait till we have a bed.” He groaned, already breathless while he fumbled with his pants, shoving them down his legs in a hurry.

Sadness filled you again, because one day he’d have a big, comfortable bed, but you wouldn’t be the one warming it.

You blinked away the tears as you clung to his shoulders.

When he breached your entrance, you felt like the wind had been knocked out of you.

You’d never gotten used to the stretch of his girth, and you wondered if anyone else would ever feel this right inside you.

“Fuck,” he groaned, hips stilling once he’s sheathed himself inside you, “God, you’re so tight.”

You felt like you were bursting at the seams, your walls quivering around his cock.

He rolled his hips tentatively, observing your face for any signs of pain, and started pounding inside you once he’d found none.

The burn soon turned into a pleasant ache.

“I’m a lucky bastard,” he snarled, punctuating each word with a rough snap of his hips, “I can’t wait to have you all to myself, dove.”

He buried his face in the crook of your neck, and didn’t notice how your lips quivered, or the tears that streamed down your face. He kept thrusting inside you, moaning each time he would feel your walls gripping his cock tightly.

Damp skin slid over yours, filling the car with the lewd sounds of his balls slapping your ass, and his belly smacking against yours.

“I’m gonna put so many babies inside you, I can’t wait to see you all swollen with my child. Fuck-, I can’t wait to come home to you everyday, my pretty little wife.”

You let yourself revel in the image. A pleasant, safe one. One that didn’t belong to you, but that warmed your heart anyways.

When the pressure in your core became too much for you to bear, you began blabbering and begging him to give you that release only he had ever given you.

“Please Lee, I need to- need to cum, baby.”

You choked on your words and shrieked when his hand dipped between your bodies, and he began rubbing circles around your clit.

“Cum for me, dove, cum all over my cock, wanna feel you fall apart on me baby.” he growled, hips stuttering.

He swallowed your cries with a kiss as you came undone. Your whole body trembled when hot waves of pleasure shook your limbs, the tight coil in your cunt unravelling all at once, releasing the pressure inside you.

You throbbed and gushed around his cock, arching your back and digging your nails in the flesh of his back.

He kept pounding inside you, riding your aftermath and praising his good girl through shuddering breaths.

“Fuck, I’m close,” he whined, and you felt his movements become errantic and his cock swell inside you.

“Finish up outside,” you managed to wheeze out.

He grunted, but obeyed regardless.

Knocking you up before he got a preacher’s blessing wouldn’t look good on his resume if he was to ever be mayor. Otherwise you’d have had a child on your hip already, you suspected.

You winced when he pulled out, and stood on his shins, hovering over you, brows furrowed, sweat dripping down his forehead.

You brought your hand down to his cock, and you stoked him once, twice, running your thumb over his slit before his hips stuttered and he painted your stomach with his white, warm load.

He collapsed next to you, holding you tight in his arms and catching his breath.

“You’re gonna be all mine soon, dove,” he whispered in your ear, rubbing his nose against yours, “and I’m gonna fill your pussy up every night, I swear. No more pulling out ever again.”

-

Freedom tasted bittersweet.

Corn fields gave way to tarmac too soon, and before you realized it, you’d left Knockemstiff and your old life behind, in hope of a new, better one

You rested against the window, your head rattling on the screen with each bump on the road. The stench of stale cigarettes, moonshine breath first thing in the morning and sweat filled the packed bus, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care.

The prospect of your future terrified you and thrilled you to no end.

You observed the cars speeding past the bus, and the streams of dried tears on your face in your reflection. Your mind swirled with thoughts, the images of Lee torturing you. Sighing to yourself, you clutched the handkerchief that the woman besides you had gently offered with a kind, knowing smile on her face.

Better forget all about him as soon as possible.

New beginnings were hard, but hope blossomed in your chest with each mile that went by. Besides, your mother’s smile when she’d waved you goodbye had given you all the strength you needed.

You let the gentle sway of the bus lull you to sleep.

She’d never looked so happy and beautiful, bathed in dawn’s warmth with her Sunday dress she’d worn to see her biggest wish come true.

Her butterfly had finally spread her wings.

-

Part 2 (hopefully coming out tomorrow)

-

So what do you think is going to happen in the next chapter? 🤭

I hope you liked it! I haven’t written in so long, but I hope it’s good. Please leave some feedback if you can, and reblog!

[just2bubbly]

Sometimes Love Stays

Masterlist

TLC Ship Week 2021!

*written for tlcshipweek2021- kaider for the prompt 'In another life'

@kaiderforever

Summary

"Hmm.."

"Do you?"

"Wish you happiness? Yeah, Kai, I do- with all my heart."

"I wish you were happiness!"

Sometimes love becomes stronger overcoming the obstacles thrown along your path, but when the obstacles never end and you become tired enough to want to stop, will 'Love' help overcome the new problem or would it be succumbed to obstacle?

When their future doesn't play out as they want to, will they dare to take a chance or lose everything without trying?

Reading an article, Cinder is thrown back into the past, trying to figure out if the choices she made were right.

A look at Kai and Cinder's relationship through newspaper article fragments.

--

Ship: Kaider

Words: 3.2k

Genre: Angst

Prompt: 'In Another Life'

Note: A Canon Divergence AU from Winter- major character/ relationship reflection. Bold contexts are newspaper articles!

Cinder's Perspective:

"Sometimes love stays."

The article read and Cinder could not bring it upon herself to understand the implications of those three words. She considered it was the most preposterous sentence to start a piece of news informing about a break-up. Her mind could only fathom that a hopeless romantic had written this article, one who most certainly believed in unrequited love and stuff- That she could be sure from the very first line. "Many times love seems to not reside in a relationship as the lovers struggle to continue to live together after years of togetherness, but this does not appear to be the case in the infamous royal courtship that lasted for over 10 years but was suddenly called off 2 years ago- Yes, we are talking about no one but The Emperor of Eastern Commonwealth and The Queen of Luna- " Cinder seemed to convince herself that she was only reading it because it was the most trending news on Earth. Yet it was no new news to her or even anyone on Earth and the saint forsaken rock Luna as well. The article had become famous only for its illustrating language and artistic words that seemed to give the entire ordeal a new look. Hence, after having ignored, overlooked and unseen the article, its rumours and the stink eye that her aristocrats sent along her way. She finally decided to read it and fucking get over it- just like she got over him. It was fucking simple until it was not. "The infamous break-up of The Emperor of EC and the Queen of Luna happens to be no news to us. It has been two years since the two royals called off their relationship in the name of diplomatic and personal reasons. However, it appears that the years apart have done no good to their awkward and unresolved heartfelt tension." She wondered which newbie journalist had decided to write about this- about them, the two lovers madly in love with each other, stubborn enough to put others above themselves and naive enough to let it all go. She could feel her body going stiff as she tried to muster up the courage to continue reading. Her mind going numb just like it always did when thoughts of Kai resurfaced. The memories and the murmurs, their banters, his adoration all seemed to drown her with misery- one where she could not shed a single tear but only carry the overwhelming weight of the past of what they had- of what they had lost. It had been good- going at first with the frequent comms in their free time, flying kisses from literally two different worlds, exchanging gifts thanks to the Rampion, jumping at the first chance to meet each other. They were happy and yet they were not. With near to 10 years into being the Queen of Luna, she had thought that maybe she had given her bit to the moon, and now she could step down from her role and convert Luna into a republican state. She had planned her future, their future, the future of thousands of people and had acted accordingly to liberate Luna from the clutches of a single person, forgetting about what the people would have to say about it? Apparently, Lunars loved royalty more than equal representation! Consequently, when she had put the matters of 'abolition of monarchy' to vote she had been made a fool in her own court with the outcome - her vote against all of them. When she had demanded an explanation out of Iko for such a bizarre scenario. She had acknowledged, "They seem to like you as their Queen. It is clear they don't want you to step down!?" "But what about equal representation?" "Cinder you are already giving it to them!" "And what about the aristocrats- Don't they want more say in the administration?" "They do want it but not with the responsibility. Thus they have started preaching about royalty and stuff..." she trailed. Dumbstruck, she had thought how can one gift someone freedom when they don't want it? That's where things started looking down. This made all her plans go downhill. Because hadn't she planned that she would step down, abolish the monarchy and turn it into a Republican government? Hadn't she decided she would be free to live her own life on Earth?

Hadn't she wondered how she would travel with Thorne on Rampion- be truly free for once in her life before having to settle down? Before having to go to New Beijing.

Hadn't they planned that they would stay together- and with every passing day weren't they coming near to achieving their intention to constantly stay together and make up for all the physical affection they had been deprived of over the years? Wasn't it what their future was going to be off? With this new hurdle, plans had to be changed and when she had mentioned this to Kai, he was grief-stricken. Even then, they came up with alternatives, for at that time it was clear- they wanted to spend the rest of their together. They had discussed spending their time between Earth and Luna, tackling the barriers of distance and royalty. It's not like they did not try, it's just that every time they strived harder to stay together- fate made it impossible to. A year later, the realization dawned upon her. It had really taken a long time but it had finally crashed- the full reality of their long-distance engagement relationship, that maybe it was taking a toll on them. That maybe they would not survive through all the distance separating them. She had been avoiding thinking about it lately but she knew even if they tried it was not going to work out, that sooner or later they would have to call it off. 'Call what off?' She had asked herself, wondering how things were going to change. 'All of it' a tiny voice in her mind replied. The engagement, the relationship. Everything. That night she decided against comming Kai, instead, she confronted Iko speaking of her troubling thoughts aloud and from the dark blue, somewhat grey colours of her eyes, Cinder understood how truly sorry she was.

She sat in the arms of Iko, wanting to whine, yell and cry. However, the cruel fate left her with a throbbing sensation in her head and an itchy feeling in the throat. She wanted to see Kai, but she had not the heart to tell him the truth. She presumed he already knew what was troubling her- troubling them. She had not the courage to see the sorrow on his face, so she pretended that everything was fine even when it was not. She smiled and teased him at all the opportunities she could possibly get knowing very well that one day that they would have to stop. One day he would have someone else do that to him. Therefore the next time she had gone on Earth she had confessed it to him. He had listened patiently without a word and had calmly accepted it. The unforgettable silence that followed would haunt Cinder forever. She thought they had fooled themselves enough trying to make the impossible happen, justifying their actions as a result of love. In the end, he had sighed, tears reflecting in his copper-brown orbs and croaked, "I guess this is the end?" She had nodded failing to meet his eyes. "Sorry, Kai", she had uttered, feeling every ounce guilty and sorrowful. They had stood like that for a long time, feet shuffling- gazes never meeting each other until he was called. He did not shed a single tear before her. On her last night at the Palace, she felt a sort of Deja-Vu for all the things around her. Her thoughts roamed around only a single thing- 'After today, this place would no longer be home'. He had come to her room that night and once they had gotten over the awkward small talk of the breakup, he had launched at her and hugged her till her bones crushed. "I love you," he whimpered. "Don't forget it- don't forget it, Cinder. Even when you go to that fucking rock in the sky." And Cinder could feel something warm- not inside her but on her shoulders.

Kai's tears had been falling on her shoulders and she had chanted sorry all the time they stayed like that.

'What do you do to calm two heartbroken souls?'

He was in her arms hearing her speak, though her words were not soothing, they did not reduce his grief like they ought to. They were bitter truth of their future, their fate. They were apologies for what they had lost. Her words were not comforting. She was not going to tell him how they will be fine when she knew they would not. There was no point lying- telling him nicely painted lies of their future when their present was broken like that. She had no idea how but they fell asleep together, a mess of tumbled limbs on the carpet for the last time. And when the streaks of sunlight fell over their sleeping forms, it was not out of hope.

"It seems that it's over for the two royals, one of them the Queen of Luna and the other The Emperor of Eastern Commonwealth. Queen Selene, 26 and Emperor Kaito, 28 called off their relationship yesterday. Emperor Kaito in his latest press speech stated that "Myself and Queen Selene are no longer together- we have parted ways on good terms. However, we are no longer involved," when one of the reporters asked if there was any wedding to be expected soon. The Queen of Luna also addressed this in one of her official posts, saying "It's been great 10 years with Kai but we can no longer stay together," with a bittersweet smile. The two refuse to brief about this. It just seems like just yesterday they were THE happier and attractive couple dancing at the Annual Peace Ball and -well now they are not, we are sure their fans all around must be heartbroken but worry not you can catch up on their relationship through the years-" Two months later, they formally announced their break-up. They called off everything- all of it just like she had thought. The world did not know- they did not know how Kai had gone down on his knees and she had said yes before he could even ask. How she had pieces of her never- going to happen wedding vows drafted somewhere in her brain. It was only them, Torin, Iko and their friends who knew the disaster of grief they had unrolled in their life. He had refused to take the ring back, "Keep it to remember me by." He had insisted and she had not-so jokingly replied, "I don't need jewels to remember you by." Returning to Luna had been the harder task, She-They had cut off all ties except maybe friendship (?) but things were going to be different- they are different.

It felt hollow for months later, she drowned herself in work to forget about the messy-haired boy, to forget that there was no one waiting for her comms now, that she did not have someone to whisper 'I love you's too', to kiss him and be found by someone, no reason for Thorne to shout 'Get a room.'

She had for the first few days been hopeless- locking herself up, both metaphorically and literally only to realize that Kai had been an integral part of her daily schedule and world even from thousands of miles away. The breaks that she once looked forward too, taunted her of what she had lost- so she was hell-bent on working the day without breaks. She forced her mind to not stray around to the boy on Earth. The only moment she had let her guard down was when Thorne was visiting- because he was her BFF and wasn't he the one who teased her all along about Kai and his heavenly copper-brown eyes? Wasn't he going to be her rock where she had lost her anchor? At the sight of his friend's dark circles, thinner than the usual frame, Thorne and Cress had bear-hugged her and the only thing that she felt was it felt good to be embraced by someone other than Iko. 'I'm so sorry, Cinder', Thorne had said and she had croaked, "Don't be sorry." She had cracked that day.

"I DON'T WANT PITY THORNE, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR HOW PEOPLE THOUGHT WE WOULD GET MARRIED AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER. I DON'T WANT THE MEDIA TO TELL ME HOW WE LOOKED GOOD TOGETHER. I FUCKING HATE LUNARS TELLING ME THAT THEY HOPE I FEEL BETTER. AM I NOT IN THIS CONDITION BECAUSE THEY CHOOSE TO BE SELFISH? THORNE, I WANT TO CRY AND MY STUPID CYBERNETICS WOULD NOT EVEN ALLOW BE TO CRY FOR MY EX-FIANCEE." She might have been a bit tipsy to blow up like that but she was past caring. She had been pretending that everything was fine while she was falling apart inside. "What sort of cruel joke is this? Haven't I already endured enough? I don't want anyone's fucking apologies. I don't want that crap, I- I want K-Kai."

She yelled as her face echoed pain. "Do I not deserve love, Thorne?" She had demanded, looking very vulnerable. She never said a word after that. The next big blow came when she had attended the world leader summit. Thankfully, it was a virtual thing or she could not have gone through the entire ceremony without a mental breakdown. She had felt the air knock out of her lungs at the sight of Kai after six whole months. He looked paler than normal, his always messed up hair looked neatly fixed in place with layers of hair gel. And his ever blinding grin present at even stupid meetings like this was now merely his lips pressed together in a thin line.

How was Kai who was her joy in human form suddenly became the picture of grief? She wondered how she looked to him if even he was out of breath at the sight of her- realizing how she was drifting away from the main reason she was attending the summit, she forced herself to look at anywhere but him. That night she slept thinking about how she was not the only one suffering. "-The Emperor of EC starts a new journey in his life at 30. However, there are no wedding bells in the air as of now, making the world and the EC anticipate the future of their Emperor and their nation. At 30, the Emperor not committed to anyone nor having any living heir had caused multiple questions to be unanswered about the legacy after him. Hopefully, he will find his partner to secure their future until then we wish him a Very Happy Birthday!" Marriage. Wedding. Love. Hadn't it been what they had lost? She knew this was going to happen. Then why did she feel like drowning all over again? Why did her heart shatter yet again? He was no longer hers to worry about...Was he even part of her world anymore? She knew it very well that he was supposed to marry someone. He must marry someone and have an heir to the Commonwealth. Cinder was asked to do the very same thing. They were monarchs who had to keep their legacies alive. The next time she was invited for the Annual Peace Ball, Kai had cornered and said, "They want me to get married." "Tell me you are saying this because you want the ring back." She had jokingly said, swallowing the sadness and jealously that threatened to submerge her. Her mind asked if he would go down on his knees at the Ball just like he had done for Levana. But that was just her stupidity, misery and desperation mixed together. How was her tyrant aunt going to manage her marriage with Kai by living on Luna along with her sinister motives?! "Cinder" "Kai", she pleaded, underlying the please without saying it. She averted her eyes and nonchalantly asked," Have someone in mind?" "No", he replied without a beat, making her at ease but what he said next crushed her healing heart again. "But I have someone in my heart." She could not stand around him without wanting to kiss him senseless. Therefore, she said, "I wish you happiness, Kai." And tried to walk away until he questioned, "Do you?" "Hmm.." she replied, looking back at him. "Do you?" He repeated. "Wish you happiness? Yeah, Kai, I do- with all my heart." "I wish you were happiness!" Looking at his lean frame dressed in the colours of EC she dared to speak, "I wish that too." She had not returned after that episode but maybe she would have to. Soon. "The Emperor has been sighted with Chen Daiyu, daughter of Chen Zian, the Chief Commandant of Light Chariot, she is an activist working towards the liberation of perils faced by cyborgs in modern society, along with being a psychotherapist by service. It's not the first time that they have been seen together making people hope that it's not the last. There are rumours about their courting with no confirmation from any one of the two-It appears the Emperor has finally moved on from his last date with Queen Selene. Only time will tell if the Emperor has found his Empress or not." She could not blame anyone. They were just pressing time trying to avoid some inescapable future- yet why did her mind ask if he had learned Chen Daiyu's favourite flowers? or Did he hold her as he had held her once? Wondered if he explained to her why there was a cyborg's foot in his room? She was cursing goddamn every star because it was not just him but even she was looking into suitors!? She had gone on dates with a few, noticing how one of them grinned like Kai with a dimple on his left cheek, how someone scratched their necks when they were flustered or how some of them had a struggle keeping their hair in place- without wanting to she was searching for Kai everywhere in them. None of the two was married yet. It was okay to imagine about him for a while. It was okay for grief to overwhelm her. Maybe that's what she needed to

move on from her past.

Had they moved on? Had they stopped loving each other? 'NO!'- she shook her head violently to no one in particular.

She loved him even now. There will always be some part of her mind that will love him. Maybe it was treasuring their memories while making new ones. Two years later reading an article about them, she thought if maybe she had tried harder, would they be together? Alas, there was no point fantasizing when both time and distance had separated them? Could they start from where they had left? Or would they be two broken pieces no longer fitting?

"Sometimes love stays," The article read again. "But lover's don't." Maybe if distance, time and qualms of royalty were not preventing them then things could have been different, their lives could have been different. Perhaps in a life with different circumstances, they would have been together unlike this one- where they had briefly touched, in another life possibly their tale could have had a happy ending. Maybe if she was Cinder and not Queen Selene Channary Jannali Blackburn of Luna, and if he was just Kai and not Emperor Kaito of the Eastern Commonwealth then they would have made it till the end.

But they were not and that's what mattered. __

A/N: We are done! :)

I know you would likely want to hit me right now since I promised certain someone that there would be no angsty fics for at least a few months and yet HERE I AM!

I have kinda portrayed Iko in this really bad, so sorry about that! And you have no idea how much frustrated I was that Cinder could not cry, like crying is such a essential part of human behavior and having to describe her grief without tears was certainly a challenge. I hope I did her character well- You guys have no idea how much break-up articles I have read just to get the news articles right. I might as well do a course on journalism later ;)

Was that a bit too much angst? and yeah in this fic they are secretly engaged!

This was written for the TLC Ship Week, the word prompt for this one was 'In Another Life'. However, I had already planned it beforehand with no idea of  how the ship-week was going to give me the perfect opportunity to post this. I know I'm cruel right?

This idea had been going a lot in my mind since I made @salt-warrior write her fic 'Anyone Else', and read the fic 'After' on AO3, along with 'Once' by @/betaluz. I just thought that maybe Cinder failed to get past the boundaries of royalty on Luna and converting it into a Republican, wondering if that happened what would happen to her relationship with Kai. Hence, this sudden angsty take.

Tell me which is your favorite part from this?

And don't worry I have more angst lined up for you! <3

Taglist: @cinderswrench @gingerale2017 @linhcinder686 @shellyseashell @ladyvesuvia @shelbylmkaider @levanariddle @cindersassasin @kaider-is-my-otp (Tell me if you wanna be added/removed)

[upthenorthmountain]

Where the World is in the Making - Chapter 13

I wrote this for the Summer 2021 Frozine, huge thank you to @punkpoemprose​ for putting that together! And to @karis-the-fangirl​ as always. Here we go

Previous Chapters

Chapter 13

The Solheims had been good people. Still were, Kristoff was sure. It was Mrs Inga Solheim who had nursed his mother through her last illness, who had said to Kristoff, after - Well, get your things together. Don’t you want to see what it’s like out West? And he had - not that he had anything else to do or anywhere else to go - so he’d pulled together the few things that he was sure were his and joined them in the back of their covered wagon. They’d inched their way across the country, along with the other two wagons of Solheims (all three were brothers, and each had a wife, and between them six children when they set out and seven when they arrived, not counting Kristoff), and he’d been quiet and anxious, desperate to prove he could be useful, that he was worth taking all that way. He’d worked hard for them and learnt a lot, and until the day he died he’d be overwhelmingly grateful for the chance they’d given him.

And now, for something else.

There was an interesting item in the newspaper last week, Mrs Solheim had written. An article about how there aren’t enough women out West. Good men with good farms who can’t find a wife. And some have apparently been placing advertisements in the newspaper to find one! What an idea! But it seems some have been successful. You should try it, Kristoff! I’m sure you must be lonely.

What an idea, indeed. He’d rolled his eyes and ignored it, but she’d mentioned it again, and again, and eventually he’d done it just so she’d stop. He’d never in a million years thought he’d actually get an applicant. He hadn’t thought he’d wanted one.

Anna was weeding the vegetable garden. The plants were all full-grown now, tall and green, and she was kneeling - she never had much regard for her skirts - between them as she worked.

With her help, he’d been able to repair the fields after the storm, and lost far less than he’d feared. With her help, the chickens were happy and gave plenty of eggs; the cow was happy and gave plenty of milk (and the goat was happy, too, though his high spirits were not usually a cause for celebration). With her help, the garden had flourished, and was producing enough that she and Elsa had already spent a day with Marta Ogg preserving and canning and would have plenty more to put up before the season was over.

Anna suddenly jumped back onto her heels with an “Ouch!” and Kristoff hurried over.

“Are you alright?”

“Oh - yes - thank you -” she peered at her finger. “A little bit of something just ran under my fingernail. But it’s not bleeding so I guess it didn’t go too far. Is it nearly dinner?”

“I’ve been out in the fields, you tell me.”

 “Elsa’s cooking. I keep thinking I smell something but I can’t work out what.” She waved her hands at him until he backed up, then shuffled along on her knees to the next section of the vegetable bed. “I like it when she cooks. She’s a much better cook than I am.”

Kristoff opened his mouth and then closed it again, choosing to kneel next to her rather than speak. Anna laughed. “Thank you.”

“I don’t mean - the two of you have different talents.”

“Okay.”

“You complement each other.”

“Well, maybe that’s true.”

“She wouldn’t have much to cook without you here, doing this.”

Anna sat back and hugged her knees. “Sometimes I still can’t believe I’m here,” she said. “Sometimes everything before seems like a dream.”

She looked at him, and no matter how muddy her skirts or how much of the dirt had found its way to her face, her eyes were always that same perfect clear blue. 

“And I’m glad,” she said. “I’m glad I’m not there any more.”

“Glad to be out of the city? Away from - people that were unkind?”

“No, you don’t understand. Before…” Anna sighed. “I didn’t do anything. I mean. I called on people, and I went out and danced and talked to more people, and I embroidered and I looked pretty and none of it had any point. Nothing I did made anyone’s life better, or easier. I was just - passing the time. My whole life. Looking pretty and passing time.”

Anna sighed again, then reached over and plucked another weed from the soil.

“There you go,” she said. “I pulled up one weed, and I’ve already been more useful than I would have been in a whole week back in the city.”

“You like to be useful.”

“I don’t like to be useless. Or pointless.”

They both sat there, among the green plants, beneath the endless sky. Kristoff could feel it, building, and he was leaning in towards her ever so slightly when Anna said abruptly, “I want to mean something,” and turned her eyes to his again, blue as the ocean and clear as the running stream.

It’s slow, sometimes, but it wears away bit by bit - or comes crashing through all at once - and nothing is the same after.

He leant towards her again, just as Elsa called them to the house for dinner.

-----

The narrow bed in the tiny room was familiar enough now. It almost felt cosy. Before coming here Anna had had her own bedroom for years, but it had never been quiet - there was always noise on the streets outside, or people passing in the corridors. Out here, being alone would have been deathly silent without the sound of Elsa’s breathing.

It wasn’t silent outside tonight, though. She could hear someone singing.

Or rather, not ‘someone’. It was a man’s voice, and there was only one man within miles, so it must be Kristoff singing. Anna couldn’t make out any words. She’d heard him whistling before, around the farm, but never singing.

She wriggled out of the bed. Elsa stirred and opened her eyes.

“I just need to, um,” Anna said, knowing that Elsa would assume she was going to the outhouse; sure enough, her sister gave a little nod and closed her eyes again.

The summer air was warm and Anna barely regretted not picking up a shawl. As she pushed the barn door open she felt a brief pang, remembering another night that she’d come out to the barn in her nightdress - but that quickly disappeared, replaced by the sight in front of her. Kristoff was sitting against the far wall, with his straw hat upside down in his lap, and the hat was full of kittens; and he was singing to them in the warm glow of a lantern.

Anna stood there for one long, breathless moment. She didn’t know the song. She didn’t even know what language it was in, although she could guess that it was Norwegian. It was a soft song; a lullaby. The kittens seemed to be appreciating it, cuddling up together in the hat, and for a second Anna thought she was going to cry. Then Kristoff finished his verse, looked up and saw her.

“Anna,” he said, and cleared his throat, sitting up straighter to a chorus of irritated meows.

“I heard you singing,” she said, walking all the way into the barn and closing the door behind her. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you -”

“You didn’t. What song is that?” she said, sitting down next to him and tucking her feet beneath her.

Kristoff looked at his hands for a moment. “My mother used to sing it,” he said.

“When you were little?” 

He smiled. “Yes.” He hesitated again, then said “I don’t want to forget it.”

Sometimes Anna got so caught up in the everyday that she forgot all kinds of things. Like, for example, the fact that they were both orphans. She knew Kristoff’s childhood had been very different to her own. If she tried, Anna could remember her mother tucking her into bed with a soft lullaby, but she could more often remember a nursemaid putting her to bed and blowing out the candle. A goodnight from her mother was usually a brief kiss; a goodnight from her father was a nod. And every day it grew fainter and her memories rearranged themselves to match the handful of photographs in the bottom of her and Elsa’s trunk.

It was better to think about the present and the future than the past. She knew that. And her mind obligingly presented her with an image - Kristoff singing that lullaby to a baby. Or maybe to an older child, as he tucked the blankets around them, and then he’d look at his wife and smile -

Anna turned her face away - she knew she was blushing. Now she remembered long ago asking a nursemaid where babies came from, and being given a confusing story about storks and cabbage patches and parcels sent directly from Heaven by God Himself. Now she was here in the warm soft lantern glow with her husband, and when she looked up he was watching her. He’d nearly kissed her in the vegetable patch earlier, she was sure. Not too far from the cabbages. The thought made her laugh and she swallowed it in a yawn.

“You should go back to bed,” Kristoff said. He’d put his hat down, and the kittens had escaped; one was sitting on his foot.

“I’m not tired,” Anna said, sitting up straighter. “I couldn’t sleep, actually.”

“Really? I thought I was working you hard enough. Obviously not.”

“I’m surprised you can sleep out here at all.”

“I’m used to it.”

“It’s not fair. You work hard too.”

“I’m a man.”

“You’re a person.”

He smiled at her indignance. “Well, if we have a good harvest, maybe I can get some lumber.”

“Mr. Ogg said they’d help!”

“I can manage. I did the rest myself.”

“Mmhmm. Like you darned your own socks. A person can be too self-reliant.”

“What’s wrong with my house?”

“Nothing! Except -” Except we don’t have our own bedroom. No, she would never be bold enough to say that out loud, and now she was blushing again.

If he kisses me now, Anna thought, there’s no one to stop us. Every other person and animal within miles is sleeping. The thought made her heart thump in her chest, and she couldn’t think of anything to say to cover her embarrassment so instead she turned away, pretending she was watching one of the kittens.

She looked up when Kristoff put his hand on her left shoulder. “Anna,” he said, and ran his hand down her arm, stopping at her hand, raising it so that her ring shone in the light of the lantern. There was an ache in her chest when she met his gaze, and everything before this moment felt like a dream. The only thing that was real was right here and now, where all her choices had led her, to the perfect moment -

He kissed her. Anna knelt up, eager, and her slipper fell off and she caught her knee in her nightdress but Kristoff wrapped an arm round her waist and kissed her again. She still stumbled a little, and steadied herself with her arm on the floor; and then it only required Kristoff to make the smallest movement and they were lying on the blanket, side by side.

For a second they blinked at each other, his arm still round her waist, her hand on his shoulder. Then Anna pressed forward again, pulling herself towards him, kissing him with her whole body against his. She half-expected him to draw back, but he didn’t; instead he ran his hand up her back to her shoulders, holding her in place.

She felt giddy. There was no one to stop them and she didn’t want them to. Alright, maybe there was only a rough blanket over a dirt floor and whatever was in that sack Kristoff used as a pillow, maybe this wasn’t exactly how she’d pictured this, but -

But there was someone to stop them, and that was them. Kristoff pulled his lips from hers and rolled onto his back, exhaling deeply. He closed his eyes for a long second, then opened them and held out his arm. Anna hesitated.

“Come here,” he said. “You didn’t - do anything wrong. It’s just…”

Not like this, was what she knew he meant. As her heartbeat slowed back to normal, Anna realised she had a piece of straw poking her through the back of her nightdress, a kitten trying to climb her braid and a draught through a gap in the boards going places she wouldn’t care to mention. Much as she wished right now that her husband was slightly less considerate, he did have a point. She wriggled over to Kristoff and lay down with her head on his shoulder, smiling a little as she felt him pull the pointy straw off her back and throw it away.

He put his arm around her, his hand on her waist. Anna could hear his heart beating, feel his chest rise and fall with his breathing. It was so comfortable. 

She opened her eyes when Kristoff said “Hey. Anna. You don’t want to fall asleep out here.”

Maybe she did. “I‘m good.”

He opened his arm to release her. “Go to bed. It’s late.”

“You don’t want me to stay?”

He looked pained. “I want you to go to bed.”

So she left and went inside. But when she got into her bed, it somehow felt at once  both too small and too empty.

[chocolate-parfait]

I've never sent an ask before so I apologize if I'm doing something wrong, but could I maybe request some more Gen Z mc headcanons? I just love the idea of mc having a platonic younger/older sibling dynamic especially with Napoleon and Jean 🥺👉👈

dw, dw! here it is✨

Gen Z!MC (pt. 2) - ikevamp headcanons (Napoleon & Jean)

Napoleon

You and Napoleon get along amazingly from the start. Sure, there is a generational gap and many of the things you do or laugh at cannot be explained, but believe me when I say that his charisma and open mindedness make up for it, a lot.

Being the naturally caring person he is, he immediately takes you under his wing (he basically adopts you, like he did with Jean and Isaac). No one is allowed to lay a hand on you for the whole month, else they'd have to catch his hands and sword. Related to this, no matter how much you tell him that you can fight on your own, he will NOT let you. First, he will have you join on his sparring sessions with Jean and teach you the basics, maybe even tell you a thing or two on how to throw a punch, but he'd rather have you safe and sound than covered in bruises and bloody scars.

This may paint him in a slightly overprotective light, but you probably won't even notice it unless you're throwing yourself headfirst into danger. A creep is harassing a woman in the street? Napoleon will deal with it before you can move another step. He was a soldier and an emperor, he has fought for a future of peace and equality, and you, the fruit of his hard work, should avoid any kind of bloodshed.

On the other hand, if the fight is verbal, he will 100% support you and cheer you on. He absolutely adores it whenever he sees the eloquence and unwavering confidence with which you defend your ideals, and he wonders whether a father would be feeling the same way.

Another thing he appreciates about you, is your humor. Although sometimes it kinda upsets him and makes him think about the type of society you must be coming from (self deprecating jokes, mostly), he cannot help but get a good laugh or two whenever he sees you laughing at the most nonsensical things.

One day, he, you and Arthur were talking about your life in the 21st century, when you happened to mention a friend of yours. "..oh yeah! This actually reminds me of my friend, Joe. Though it's too bad that he died of ligma" "I'm so sorry to heart that... what's... what's ligma though? A new illness?" "🕴 L I G M A B A L L S 🕴" im sorry this joke is overused but its 1AM and i saw it on a jujutsu kaisen tiktok pls beare with me

(+ you and Arthur falling to the ground, tears in your eyes and the most horrible whale noises filling up the whole room)

Other times you come up with the most original and unusual phrases that don't match your usual speech at all. "MC, what were you doing before coming here?" "I had sworn an oath of solitude 'till the blight was purged from mine lands" "What..?" "I was in quarantine because of a global pandemic" Oh.

When the time comes for you to say goodbye, he will, of course, feel a heavy dagger in his heart, but he'll gladly let you return to your peaceful time, the place where you belong to the most. Knowing you, you'll surely be fine, after all.

Jean

He's confused at first. You're young, somewhere near his age back when he was alive, and according to what you told the others you come from a """relatively""" peaceful time. without considering police brutality, discriminations, wars in certain countries, and a pandemic. Let's just say that many of us can lead a life without going to war and such But why, why are you so cursed?

Saying that he's taken aback would be an understatement. He simply cannot get more than half of what you talk about, he's not a social butterfly and he struggles with being open with others; you, however, don't seem to mind it too much. You approach him, fearlessly and with genuinely good intentions only. He resists and tries putting distance between you, but there's something, something that makes him want to talk to you, laugh with you and understand you more.

Your arrival shows him that which he could not be. A simple teenager. An innocent person who peacefully lives without having to worry about traitors, incoming battles and the sight of dead comrades in a puddle of their down blood. You look so carefree in whatever you do, even when nervous and hesitant, and yet you do not lack depth. He has seen you defending your principles, the fire in your eyes and spirit wholly concentrated on your interlocutors. Could he have been like that, too, if he had been given the chance?

Ever since meeting you, he's become more and more determined to learn the basics which he had completely missed during a time of war. Reading and writing, for example. He's not as naive as to completely let go of all his sins, but the untainted side of him, which had survived so many years of slaughter and had tied the adjectives "saint" and "pure" to his name, pushed him to work hard for those simple yet rewarding goals.

He's utterly at a loss for words when you propose to help him out though, and even more when he sees the lack of judgmental sneer in your eyes. Could you really be so innocent? Or perhaps it's a sign of your maturity and benevolence? Maybe you two are not so different, after all. Sure, you may be one hell of an oddball, but he surely isn't that normal, either

Whether he likes it or not, Jean subconsciously starts considering you as a younger sibling, and he feels the need to protect you by sacrificing himself; he's the only one with stained hands, you should remain the way you are. Pure and childlike, like he used to be. This will bring you to butt heads every now and then, because yours is not a kindness that stems from ignorance, but from open mindedness and awareness. In the end, you're both mutually taking care of each other, and it's so wholesome that someone's younger brother might feel a bit jealous of your bond.

Teach him some modern songs and some slangs (Jean to the other residents: wassup, my fellow homies!), tell him about popular blockbusters and bestseller stories, do some popular challenges with him, like the chubby bunny one but using macarons instead. Jean will naturally develop a smile, and his usual dark aura will slowly dissipate, like a clear sky after a thunderstorm.

After the month passes by, he gets more and more nervous as the day of your departure gets closer. He's used to saying goodbyes before heading into battle, prepared not to come back alive anymore, but to do it with someone who will be alive, even if years and years after your present time? That's definitely a first for him. Nevertheless, knowing the time where you'll be going back to, he feels reassured, and is finally able, perhaps for the first time in his turbulent life, to say "goodbye" with a smile on his face

[prompt-master]

Bear Trap (Part 1/3)

Request fill for @hibiscuswolverine and art done by @doodles-by-noodles

The world was starting to heal.

Little by little, everyone who survived Hope's Peak Academy's killing game was bringing about change to the world. It had only just started, and they likely wouldn't live to see their vision fully realized, but there was hope. Hope the world hadn't seen since the tragedy broke out in the first place.

Yep, Naegi Makoto had a lot of work to do, but he also already had so much to be proud of. He and the survivors had already proven themselves to adapt to a world that was nothing like the one they left behind. They had been given a warning from Enoshima Junko herself, but even with the knowledge of killer robots and rampaging despair-induced rioters nothing could really prepare them for life on the outside.

Honestly, they had never expected to make it to where they were right now. Proud members of the Future Foundation, able to work together with the higher ups to take down the biggest threats against the world's progression. It felt like just yesterday they were sleeping in the rubble of what once were apartments, tightly packed together in case anything were to break in. And now Makoto stood proud and tall, going over his next mission on video call with a member of one of the higher divisions.

"I suppose I shouldn't be terribly surprised that the Ultimate Hope would be so adamant on these matters."

Makoto smiled, still as strong and inspiring as it had been back in the killing game, "Really, you don't have to call me that. I'm nothing special, just Naegi is fine."

She completely ignored him, looking over the notes he'd sent to her one last time. He and Aoi had accidentally discovered a distress call from a group of survivors in an unsafe area. There was no way he could ignore something like that, he wouldn't ignore any possibility that someone was suffering like his class did. Even if there was an equal possibility that it was a trap.

"Well, your plan asks for Ultimate Detective Kirigiri Kyoko and Ultimate Affluent Progeny Togami Byakuya to go with you. With those two, plus the Ultimate Hope, equipped with hacking guns then I see no reason to be concerned for any mishaps. Your mission is approved."

Makoto's smile widened at that, feeling a rush of pride and hope at her words, "We won't let you down! Promise!"

She didn't even look up at him, simply humming to let him know she heard. But he could tell, there was a slight smile on her face. Makoto managed to melt his fair share of hearts even if he couldn't explain how. The call blinked off, and Makoto shut his laptop gently, but with no regard to what it was running.

He let out a loud sigh, slouching back into his chair. Any and all office calls felt so nerve wracking. Each one held its own weight in importance. Every exchange oversaw the future. He pulled his arms over his head, stretching them as far as they could go.

He could already feel himself getting pumped up. A small, prideful smirk snuck it's way onto his face. The plan wasn't anything extreme, but he knew with his friends by his side it would all be ok. They were meant to go together in a group so that they could protect themselves in the event of a trap or other unforeseen circumstances. The distress call came from a fallen city mostly blocked off by a collapsed building. They would drop off inside the city's bounds, and continue on foot to find any survivors they could. They knew there would be some despaired within, but that was a given anywhere they went now.

It would all be worth it to save them.

Now he just had to tell Byakuya and Kyoko the good news

It was clear to anyone near the survivors that Byakuya, Kyoko, and Makoto were a force to be reckoned with. While the general public has no qualms with calling Makoto the leader of the group, it was more so all three of them were coleading. Each taking charge in their own way, from the start of their new lives to now. The three of them were all incredibly smart in their own ways and their combined skills lead to a team that could likely conquer any despair they faced. But it took an even closer eye to see the emotional connection the three shared with each other. 

Makoto walked in front, leading since he had heard the distress call in the first place. It was certainly an interesting relationship that the three had. Although Makoto certainly didn't see himself as the leading type it seemed that Byakuya and Kyoko both trusted his guidance entirely. And he did the same for them. There was no way to describe the significance that lay underneath the floorboards of their bond. For the two most emotionally shut off of the survivors to so openly trust him? To Makoto that was enough to lay their hearts out in the open for him to see. And not to mention…

Makoto glanced back at the two. Byakuya was messing around with his hacking gun, glasses slipping down his nose, and hair nearly hiding his eyes from Makoto's view. Kyoko was taking in her surroundings, trying to figure out sooner rather than later if this whole thing was just a trap as suspected. Her eyes may be void of emotion but the color and warmth was vast. Makoto faced forward again, his face feeling just a bit hot. 

They were both really pretty. 

No, no he can't focus on his silly crushes. Yes, crushes plural. Because Makoto's sensitive heart was so big he managed to give it away to two different people. That didn't matter right now though, because the focus was on the mission. 

The town was about as decimated as it looked from the outside. It reminded him of his first experiences out in the new world, making him wonder how many survivors might be hiding under rubble, scared to come out. So far they hadn't run into any sort of trouble. No robots, no despaired, no survivors. There was really...nothing here. It was starting to look more and more like a trap. 

Makoto stopped walking at a split path, "The call said to find the convenience store but...I can't tell where to go since everything's been destroyed." 

Byakuya came to stand by his side, "Not that it should matter much all things considered. Let's just get this over with so we can clear out those insane idiots and rebuild this place already." 

"Togami-kun!" Makoto pouted, Byakuya may have softened up but he still had a habit of harsh thinking first, "don't say that. I'm sure there has to be someone here who needs saving. There's people who need to be rescued everywhere we go!" 

"Indeed" Kyoko chimed in, "but it's not a bad line of thought. If we stage a rebuilding operation here then that increases our chances of finding survivors then if only a search team walked around." 

Byakuya smirked, pushing up his glasses in that annoyingly arrogant way of his, "And to do that, we need to weed out the problems first no?" 

"Yes...yes we do." 

"Besides what would you rather do? Try to talk to the despaired? And get clubbed again?" 

"It was one time, Togami-kun!" 

Byakuya laughed, placing his hands on his hips as he looked around, "Come now, this way. All these buildings are too destroyed to make any sort of distinctions regardless. And by your sentimental logic we should be checking more than just the given location, wouldn't you agree." 

Byakuya didn't wait for an answer, he walked ahead to begin searching the first building to their left. Makoto had to break into a light jog to catch up to him; damn your long legs Togami! 

That marked the start of their exploration, building after building. They found nothing. Not to mention everywhere seemed like it has been residential, no sign of the store they were told the survivors were. Even Makoto felt like something was a little bit off but he couldn't quite place his finger on it. Regardless he kept up hope, he had heard those survivors speak with complete clarity in their voice. They had to be here. He wouldn't give up over a simple bad feeling. 

Byakuya stepped over broken glass, moving further into the crumpled home he was currently inspecting. A surprisingly intact kitchenette caught his eye, and decided a thorough search was necessary without telling his company. Although they didn't need much prompting to understand when he went off trail again. Kyoko thought if he was going to focus on possible material goods stored away in this forgotten piece of life, then she could at least see if there was any current piece of life hiding away as well. Makoto stood at the door of the house. He'd given nothing more than a glance to Byakuya before turning toward the outdoors again. Looking for anything. Any sign of life lurking under the foreboding red sky. 

Nothing. 

He sighed, turning his attention down to what used to be a grass area. Not much was left of that, in fact it looked almost like any plant life besides the weeds in the street cracks were...set on fire. The ground had this grey ashy feeling to it. And when Makoto scuffed it with his shoe….yeah, that was definitely the remains of something burning. That was a good sign right? It meant that someone was alive. This couldn't have been that long ago. 

Makoto opened his mouth to call for his friends, when a cold hand slapped over his mouth and forcefully tugged him backwards. 

Huh

Huh?!

Makoto was immediately kicking and yelling. He bucked like a disturbed wild animal, trying everything he could to get out. Wiggling, kneeing, elbowing, even trying to bite the hand over his mouth but none disturbed the individual. The house was getting farther and farther away but his voice was too muffled to ever reach it. There was heavy breathing in his ear, the air wet and warm against his skin in a way that made his body shudder. He forced himself to look up at his kidnapper. An individual with a wide smile on their face and eyes that spoke of a spiraling psyche. Everything about them...from their expression to their actions to their lack of reaction to pain...it all said despair. 

Eventually Makoto was dragged into the street and thrown down like a slab of meat. Makoto was about to scream again for help, when a hand quickly reached out for him. He couldn't help but flinch back, shoulders bunching up in an attempt to shrink away. His tie was yanked off, the force pulling his body upwards. When the tie snapped off he fell back again, he could feel rocks digging into his skin from the fall. Then his hands were tied behind his back. This was bad. This was so bad. Bad didn't even BEGIN to cover it. 

His captor came uncomfortably close, having lost all concept of personal space in the madness the end of the world has provided. Makoto tried his best to keep calm as they placed their arms to either side of him so that they were above, staring down below. There was a tense moment where neither moved, they simply tried to catch their breaths so that the silence would stop being filled with panting. It felt like a test. Like they were waiting for him to even dare to try to escape. They wanted to show Makoto what happened when he disobeyed! He could see it in their eyes! In the manicale look, in the smile that kept opening and closing like a strange gutted fish. The way their arms trembled and shook by Makoto's head, just waiting with the high of excitement.

Arms still shaking, mouth overflowing with spittle and pupils pinprick sharp, they began to slowly lower themselves. Makoto held his breath, willing his body to sink further into the concrete. His heels scraped against the ground, but he willed himself not to move in fear that any sign of escape would reward him with a slit throat. Their noses pressed against each other. The captor let out a shaky relieved sigh, as if the contact was the greatest thing they'd felt in a long time. Their eyelids fell half lidded, their smirk from excited to downright sadistic.

"I've got you now, Mr. Ultimate Hope."

Stay calm. You've dealt with this kind of person before. 

Makoto's nails gave a tug as he ran them against the concrete in an attempt to ground himself, dirt filling the space between skin and keratin. His heart hammered in his chest as if he were a scared rabbit, but there was no time to panic here. His life depended on it.  The despaired were completely delusional...which meant..

Makoto felt a laugh rise out of him, nervous and high in pitch.  A bit too high in pitch. He scraped the ground again, enough so that it began to hurt from the force. Calm down. Stay fucking calm. 

"Heh...heheh! Yeah! You got me..!" A smile graced his face, "what did you...get me for?" 

They pulled back, but not enough so that the pungent smell of smoke and ash left Makoto's nose. Their head tilted, daring to make an innocent face, "You know who you are, right?" 

"I do. And who are you?" 

Their body moved back and forth as they laughed with everything they had, their knees closing in so that Makoto could feel it against his leg. "Me? Me? Mememe?? Forget that! You're the Ultimate Hope!"

"That's right…" 

"I wonder what Miss Junko would say right now. Seeing you pinned down like this?" Their eyes flickered to the sky at the fantasy that no doubt filled their mind. 

Makoto tried his hardest not to cringe, and just attempted to change the subject instead, "Do you want me to do something for you?" It was a loaded question. One that made Makoto feel like he was picking all the wrong dialogue choices. 

"I do!" 

Progress. He wasn't sure if it was good progress, but it was, in fact, progress. 

"What's that?" 

Their voice dropped to a whisper, waning and cracking in excitement once again. They reached into their pocket. 

"I want you to watch this" 

They pulled out a little remote that looked horribly put together. Even with how much their hand trembled he could see that it was made of what seemed to be the remains of a torn apart scrap pile. Before Makoto could ask what they meant, they pressed the only button built in. 

What ensued was a large explosion. 

------

BOOM 

A loud eardrum breaking noise filled the previous silence. Byakuya was forced to grip the kitchen countertop as the world around him shook, a sudden intense burst of wind following soon after. The heat uncomfortable against his face. He made his way to the open wall, Kyoko not far behind him. 

"Was that an explosion?" Kyoko asked, not wanting to waste any time. 

Byakuya looked outside at the smoke and fire that overtook the sky. It was suffocating just to look at. Shit, it was definitely a trap then. "Looks like it" 

They watched frozen, transfixed on the horror as a building toppled from where it was standing, joining the others as rubble for them to walk on. They still stayed in place. They knew there was nothing they could do to prevent or help the issue. 

Byakuya was so focused on the sight, thinking about how he had to call for an early pick up that he didn't even notice until Kyoko asked. 

"Where's Naegi?" 

------

Makoto gasped and gasped as he ran for his life. After whatever that person had rigged went off he found himself surprisingly not being pinned anymore as the person sat cackling nearby. He had managed to slip away when more despaired came over and argued with the individual who had been pinning him.  Now he was running as fast as he could hoping he wouldn't get caught once again. 

He struggled against his traitorous tie, feeling it chafe against his wrists uncomfortably. Untying it would have been enough of a challenge without the running aspect. Now he found himself tripping over his own feet trying to think about the two things at once. 

Before he knew it, his feet had slipped right out from under him and he barely caught himself before faceplanting. 

Taking the fall as a hint, he stopped to catch his breath, looking around the area to gauge where he was. It seemed like more of the same until he saw a rather structurally sound convenience store. It was surprisingly big too for how little damage it had. A smile overtook his face. Aren't I lucky? Maybe the people inside can help me get this dang tie off. 

After letting his breathing calm down he made his way toward the store. Elation filled his heart, a familiar hope that kept him going. He knew it couldn't have all been a trap! Almost there now. Once inside he'd have someone untie his hands, and then he'd find his friends and-

His friends. He hoped Byakuya and Kyoko were safe. He had no idea how far the damage of the explosion traveled, but if it was enough to collapse an entire building there was certainly the risk of them being in hot water. Not to mention the multiple despaired that were walking around, who knows what sort of danger they could walk into. Then again, if anyone was capable of holding their own it would be Byakuya and Kyoko. But he should probably focus on his own safety instead of imagining Byakuya and Kyoko taking down their enemies in the most attractive way possible-

He was right there. He'd reached the convenience store. All the windows were covered up so that he couldn't see inside, but he knew someone inside was waiting. He just had to- huh? What's that? 

Makoto looked down to see a familiar, very unwelcome sight. It was a Monokuma with yellow and black stripes. At the top of its head was a red siren. And they were making eye contact. 

"Shi-" 

Instinctively he reeled back at the loud, sharp noise. The sound raised and lowered it's pitch smoothly, reminding him of tsunami drills he had to do back when he was in school and the implications it brought were similarly horrifying.

So much for being lucky. Makoto felt himself panicking again, the siren was loud enough to hurt his ears. He couldn't tell if his ears were ringing or if the siren was just that obnoxious. But he didn't have time to complain about that. The noise and the light… no doubt others would be coming soon. 

"Shh...shhhh!! Stop it!" He couldn't break the machine with his hands the way they were...he had to settle for getting help. 

Makoto stopped in his tracks before he could approach the door of the convenience store however, because there was someone watching him through the window. They'd opened the curtain to check what the commotion was. Makoto saw no madness or instability in their eyes...the survivors really WERE here. Makoto smiled, wishing he could wave and gesture for help, but he had to hope his expression was enough. 

The survivor frowned, eyes fixated on the Siren Monokuma. Without looking at Makoto again they closed the curtain.

No one was coming to help. 

Makoto backed away. That's ok. There was still a chance. If he ran quick enough maybe he could get away before reinforcements arrived. 

The growling he heard mocked his fruitless thoughts. That was the deranged sounds a Beast Monokuma made…he couldn't hope to outrun one of those. They were like real rabid bears but worse because they never got tired. They never stopped running once they had you in its sights, just like this one. 

But Makoto tried anyway to flee, only to end up taking a riot shield to the face from a Guard Monokuma. 

"Oof!" 

He fell back hard feeling all air leave his lungs. The snarling and pounding of the Beast Monokuma was getting louder. Too loud. Makoto rolled onto his side, scrambling to get up. He winced as a claw grazed his cheek, first blood of the night welling up. 

He felt like an insignificant worm with how he desperately rolled on the floor, hoping to find good enough footing in his panic to stand. But when he got to his knees he was met with another riot shield. He almost didn't react in time to dodge another slash from the Beast, managing to get the tie around his wrists cut. 

He'd never gotten to his feet so quickly before in his life. Bits of gravel stuck to his palms and blood ran down his right arm. He scrambled to find something -anything- to defend himself with, but he was already surrounded. It was too late to even bother going for the Siren Monokuma. How the hell was he supposed to-? 

He yelled out as sharp metal claws dug into his back, seemingly deep enough that he feared for his spine. The claws rake along his back as the beast removes them. If that wasn't enough to bring him back to reality, he was quickly overwhelmed, bruises being beaten into every inch of his skin from the shields, and slashes from regular Monokuma's on his arms. And worse of all the Beast Monokuma that was trying its best to chomp his head off with it's twitchy manic movements. He tried his best to fend it off, pushing at it personally with his bare hands despite the continuous relentless assault he was receiving. 

Another good hit with a shield and his hands slipped. In a split second moment that he didn't even get to think about, he reached a leg up and kicked at its face. He only had a moment of victory.

It bit down on his leg and didn't let go.

Now the interesting thing about Makoto is that even though he doesn't seem capable, he's grown to be able to keep himself calm when it mattered. Even at his own execution, where he was slowly heading towards his untimely demise, With frequent reminders of what was about to come, he had managed to keep as calm as possible. Even well he fell stories down into the garbage. He refused to make a peep and panic when every one of his friends could see. But right now no friends were watching.

Naegi Makoto screamed.

-----

"I'm going to kill Naegi my damn self for running off when we find him." Byakuya was, as per usual, annoyed as hell. 

Kyoko sighed, "Calm down. I'm sure there's a reason, you know he isn't like that." 

Byakuya rolled his eyes, but didn't say a word. Kyoko was completely right, but he would never give her the satisfaction of admitting that. His silence was enough. 

They had made way for the source of the explosion only to find the path to the other side of the city was completely blocked off by the collapsed structure. Due to the closed off nature of the cities remains that left them with only one option: go the long way around and hope those entrances aren't blocked as well. 

When it was just Kyoko and Byakuya there was always this weird silence. Sometimes comfortable, sometimes tense. Makoto was always the one to fill it, he was like the bridge between the two. Kyoko wished he could tell Byakuya to cheer up -his attitude was getting on her nerves- but Makoto's absence was the whole reason for it in the first place. 

"Keep your guard up" she reminded, her own hand staying close to the pouch strapped to her thigh. Inside was an all weather purpose mini notepad and a handheld taser. She quite liked her taser, it was both heavy hitting and satisfied Makoto's wish to not kill anyone: even the despaired. "I'm certain that explosion was rigged up by a person." 

Byakuya scoffed, "I am Togami Byakuya" he kindly reminded her. Kyoko rolled her eyes, she'd heard that way too many times to count. "My guard is always up and my reaction time is perfect. Maybe you should worry about yourself instead." 

"Incorrigible as usual, I see." 

He glared back down at her, still walking forward with overconfident strides, "I'll have you know-" 

There it is. Another rant which consisted only of Byakuya boasting about his own skills. She shut him out without a second thought, focusing on her surroundings instead. It's not as though Byakuya would provide any sort of new information anyway. 

"Wait." She interrupted, which Byakuya hated, but his feelings be damned, "do you hear that?" 

Byakuya paused, facing towards the direction she was looking. There was a sound in the distance, something familiar. It was far, but if he focused hard enough he could figure it out. 

Kyoko and Byakuya looked at each other, both having recognized the siren's undeniable screech at the same time. With a nod, they began to run. Makoto or not, whoever was caught by that Siren Monokuma was in danger. Byakuya steadied his hacking gun in his hand and Kyoko effortlessly pulled her taser from it's bounds. Despite their great desire to find Makoto meer seconds ago, they hoped that anyone else would be caught by the Monokuma's. But, this was Makoto after all. 

It took an undetermined amount of time for them to loop around to the convenience store, but the time spent felt uncomfortably long to them both. When they did arrive they found it was a chaotic mess. There was a group of Monokuma's huddled together over one unseen person. There was blood scraped across the concrete as though someone was dragged with their horrible injuries and all. But there were no sounds of a struggle. The sight was more akin to school yard bullies gathering to kick a victim than a genuine fight. 

Without wasting much time Byakuya fired at the Siren Monokuma, destroying it without a second thought. "Damn noise was getting on my nerves" He said. 

Kyoko shook her head, "Focus" she pointed her nose towards the pile up. Byakuya's uncaring attitude toward the situation showed that he believed the person was already dead. One by one the machines fell apart or destroyed themselves. And in their wake was a small, bloodied mess in human shape. The smell of copper and the sickening sight of messy pink was one they had gotten all too used to over the years. But that didn't make it easier when you recognized one of those bodies as someone you cared about. 

Byakuya felt harsh, furious breaths of air pushing in and out of his nose. The action was an almost unconscious response. He couldn't help but let anger well up at the sight of Naegi Makoto laying on the ground curled up on his side.

He grit his teeth, "Is he…?" Dammit. A Togami didn't hesitate. Certainly not Byakuya.

"No." Kyoko's voice was barely more than a whisper, and for a split second he thought she was simply in denial. But no, she had caught  sight of Makoto's chest moving up and down. She made way to him, hands hovering over him unsure of how deep his injuries ran. The first thing she saw were vicious claw marks running down his back. There were bits of debris clinging to the wound. They were ugly and jagged things. She wanted to roll him onto his back to get a better look at him but was it even safe to move him at all? She didn't want to risk paralyzing him. Not to mention she'd be pressing his wound to the ground. She glanced to his leg. A complete mangled mess, she could tell the unit that attached itself to his leg was relentless in its attack. Shaking and thrashing and the like. The fabric that once covered his leg was all but torn to shreds leaving the whole injury on brutal display. There was blood pooling underneath where he lay on the ground. His skin was pale from blood loss, breaking into a cold sweat that made her certain shock was already setting in. Almost all exposed skin was blossoming into a different, unnatural color indicating a plethora of bruises. His breathing was quiet but heavy, he'd already lost a lot of blood. When her eyes finally trailed up to his face she felt a small bit of relief that his features were marred by only a small cut on his left cheek, with a lazy stream of blood pouring from it. 

Byakuya and Kyoko were two individuals with a massive disconnect of their emotions brought about by their upbringing. Byakuya turned any emotion he felt into anger and disdain. Kyoko snuffed out most emotions she felt so that nothing would show. They had the emotional resolve of steel, it wasn't easy breaking down their walls. Makoto was that strange part of the equation that ruined all of that. He managed to get Byakuya to be intrigued by someone so seemingly insignificant and he managed to get Kyoko to act pouty and almost childish during the game. Yes, their entire lives were spent crafting these defenses. And now they had to fight to keep it all together with only elmers glue in their arsenal.

Kyoko was up close and personal with all the gruesome details of his attack. She tried to shove it all down so that she could completely focus on ensuring Makoto's survival. But he was looking up at her with a dazed half lidded look, as though any second the world would slip away from under his feet. And despite that Makoto smiled when he caught eyes with her. Kyoko's heart cracked. 

Byakuya could only watch with his fists by his side. He had set out to ensure all the survivors of the first killing game continued to survive and here we are. He forced all these feelings to be translated into anger. But he knew the underlying causes. He knew there was a part of him that simply was scared for his friends sake. 

The two of them both understood the others emotional grievances. And that's exactly why Byakuya's heart skipped a beat when Kyoko looked up at him with fear vibrant in her eyes. 

"It doesn't look good." 

[hannahthedragon]

I was talking with my friends about the knew champion, though we all have some mixed opinions the general consensus was we're pretty excited. One thing lead to another in our rambling and I mentioned that why would she make a doll with the royal crest? Was it for her or maybe a child? It was a sad theory but even in the trailer Isolde and Viego are both looking at her stomach. Eitherway struck with inspiration I wrote a fanfic around this idea.

⚠️So major warning!⚠️ This features pregnancy and the death of the carrying mother. Don't read if these are sensitive topics for you!

◇~~~~~~~~~~~~~◇

Viego sat at the head of a long table, advisors, treasurers and practically everyone else with any authority in the kingdom sat along the sides. They all debated back and forth about what to do next, something about the financial situation of the kingdom, but their king couldn't bother to listen, instead, he sat there with his head resting upon his hand. He dreamt of his queen, his lover, and the only girl who could seem to hold his attention, Isolde. She had been feeling sick lately, was she going to be okay while he was away? How dare this meeting keep him from more important matters, he thought. 

"Your highness." A voice snapped him back to what was happening around him, along with a tap on his shoulder. Kallista, his trusted General was who the hand belonged to, she stood behind him like a shadow whenever his kingly duties were to be fulfilled, being a far larger help than Viego ever was. "What is it you want to do?"

"Whatever you all can come to agree on. It matters not to me." Viego half-heartedly replied.

"You are the king. And this is your kingdom. It does matter to you." The treasurer replied, barely holding back his anger. Luckily however someone else spoke up suggesting a compromise of their plans, taking the heat off Viego for the time being. Finally, after what felt like an excruciatingly long time, the meeting was over, the king being the first to stand and leave. 

Although Kallista followed at first for his protection, he waved her off, requesting to be alone or for better phrasing, alone with his love. She did just that, having other duties she could attend to with the time. Now alone he entered his chambers, he couldn't help but smile at the sight of Isolde. She sat at the end of the bed seeming to be waiting for him, she looked happy, though nervousness filled the cracks in her smile. "Viego… there is something that I need to tell you."

His smile morphed to concern as he shut the door behind him, moving to sit by her side, "what is it my stars?" 

She took a long pause and a deep breath, then spoke, turning to look Viego in the eyes. "We're going to have a child." A warm smile grew on her face, clearly happy about the announcement. 

Viego seemed just as happy, leaning over to wrap his arms around her, kissing her on the neck. "Finally someone to love just as much as you." He whispered in her ear. Finally leaning away getting his joy contained he asked a question. "How can you be sure?" 

"All the signs were there. So I went for testing. All the best they could offer. Every single one said yes. I should have told you sooner but I wanted to be sure."

"The surprise was well worth the wait." He said, unable to stop himself from kissing his love again.

"I'm sure she'll be strong and kind. Just like you." Isolde ran her fingers through Viego's long hair, hoping to see his face better. 

"She?" He raised his brow.

"Yes. Many of the tests pointed to a girl."

"That's lovely. I'm sure she'll be just as beautiful as you are." Isolde could only reply with a light-hearted chuckle at the complaint, something she received from Viego daily. 

"I can't wait to meet her." She smiled looking down at her stomach, still yet to show any sign of a child. 

"She'll have a kingdom when we do." He said looking as well. Despite the arrogance he knew he was not fit to rule, he never was. This was his brother's throne, cast upon him unexpectedly. He didn't know what to do. So he could only hope to raise their daughter to be better. The lovers spent the rest of the night talking about their future, and the future of their child. This had to be the second happiest day of their lives, only beat by the night of their wedding, and just as they did then, the two fell asleep in each other's arms. 

Time passed, though the king, holding little concern for those of his kingdom made no effort to announce the news to the kingdom, word had gone around inside the castle of the Queen's expectancy. Though little of them could be excited with the kingdom's trouble still being front and center, this only serving to distract the king more. Isolde remained blissfully unaware of these issues while Viego actively ignored them. Mutters went around of how this problem might have been avoided if the king had chosen to marry another royalty as they advised, the kingdoms being able to partner and help each other. But his heart was set on the peasant lady he had fallen for at first sight, and no one could deter him. 

Now Isolde sat in her workshop, a small room filled with her many supplies from her days as a seamstress. A hobby she had kept even when ascending upon the throne. It was obvious to anyone close to her she loved her days before belonging to the kingdom, often dressing in surprisingly casual clothes when not among the public. Simple dresses with aprons atop them. All sewn herself. Even Viego couldn't convince her to ease up on this part of herself. Despite having more than enough resources and power, Isolde sat alone in her workshop sewing small garments for her soon to be daughter. Though it was possible the test could be wrong, such a thought never even passed her by. Blinded by the idea of raising a princess with the world ahead of her. Never having to work long tiring nights as she had done before her new life. 

A candlelit up the simple room, as a music box slowly turned on the desk as music, the same she had received as a wedding gift, and treasured since that day. Isolde and Viego dancing to its tune on late nights, twirling endlessly. Having now made enough clothes to last the first year of the child's life at all stages, Isolde had to start making other things for her to fill her excitement. Laying on the table in front of her was a doll. Cute as she could possibly make it. The spitting image of everything Isolde thought of a princess, something she struggled to see herself in. She was almost done, large bright blue yarn hair filling her head, a frilly dress adorning her body, and button eyes smiling towards the sky. She was just finishing the last touches, sewing to it the ribbon brooch she wore with many of her formal outfits. It carried with it the crest of the royal family, a sign that she would be part of theirs. Viego entered the room just as the music came to a slow, the door creaking open to announce him. 

"Hard at work my love?" He asked, laying his hands over her shoulder to look at what she could be making now.  

"Yes. I just want everything to be perfect when she's here." Isolde smiles, brushing his hands off and standing. Bringing the doll across the room to sit on the pile of clothes she had made. 

"You shouldn't have to work so hard, let others do the work for you." 

"I know, I know. But I enjoy this. Really. This is more than I could have ever asked for." Isolde commented, looking over the collection of colorful fabrics she had access to. 

"Just don't tire yourself," Viego advised, stepping behind her once more resting his head on against hers, one hand resting on her stomach, which had now formed a small bump to it. "Come. Rest with me. You can return here another day." 

"Mmh." She nodded in agreement, resting her hand atop Viego's, they were tired and worn from her grip on the needles and scissors she had worked with all day. She blew out the candle and left the dark room by the side of her beloved.

However the day she returned to her workshop didn't come. Instead collecting dust along the shelves of clothing and the doll of the little princess. The kingdom had enough of the king who was casting their land into ruin, attempting to strike him down, they failed, taking Isolde instead. Though the dagger only grazed her arm, the strong poison acted quick. She wasn't quite dead. Not yet. Instead in a state of lasting sleep. This was a twisted hell for Viego, watching his queen's life drain day by day, as he could do nothing about it. He never left her side but commanded everyone who could to search for a cure. He was advised against this, begged to stop as every last resource of the kingdom went into saving her. He didn't care. What was the point of having a kingdom if his queen couldn't rule it by his side? If his daughter wouldn't be here to see it. 

Everything he could do wasn't enough though. Isolde silently passed one night, Viego by her side. He couldn't accept this. Never. He had seen magic before. Even rumors of immortality, something he remembers hearing his uncle ran to pursue. He knew there was still a chance. He grew more hateful by the day, locking himself away with his wife's body. 

Finally, Kallista, his most trusted General had arrived back from her searches. The torment of the situation had made the king come to despise her, the one who deflected the attack to his stars. He would have killed her on sight if not for her news. An island of blessed water, able to heal the queen. Though when she heard the news of the queen's fate she resisted helping, she gave in. Viego carefully lifting Isolde's body, he carried her to the docks, sailing off to their last hope. His last hope for his family and the last hope for Isolde's hard work. 

The rest of the kingdom joined the workshop in collecting dust after that.

[shini--chan]

Yandere England HCs

I remember somewhere around here in my inbox somebody requested yandere England hcs. If I recall correctly, there handle was @hehehhewaitwhat  Sadly, the ask has vanished from the box, but I still recall receiving it! So here you go:  

Yandere England

Arthur would be one of the yanderes that would play it cool at first. No cool isn’t the right word – it is cold. He would believe in keeping a tight control on his emotions, least they take over him and he is no longer his own master. All in all, a very good idea, it is just the matter of execution that matters – Arthur would be doing this in a very unhealthy way. He’d bottle up his feeling on a large part, refusing to analysis them and locate the source, not to mention expressing his emotions in healthy ways. And here would be where the yandere tendencies start to blossom.

It would result in all his ignored and unacknowledged feelings for you start to seep through in the most eery ways, ways that would be borderline toxic. What could have potentially been love would become twisted and wrapped, some of Arthur’s other issues just amplifying this. In the end, he wouldn’t be able to prevent himself from either manipulating you into his web, or outright kidnapping you.

The insistent burning in his veins never ceased, rather it grew even worse when you weren’t close to him. It was magma rolling in his veins, eradicating even more of his rational thoughts the longer he attempted to ignore it.

In an attempt to remedy it, Arthur turned the water in the shower to ice-cold. A mistake on his part. It had gave a sharp contrast and thus made the concoction of emotions stand out all the sharper. It made him wonder if the only cure would be to give into them and let nature take its course.

Yet that was something he couldn’t allow. Emotions were the leftovers of a primordial past – notions that didn’t follow any logic or decency. If they weren’t controlled, then they would control.

He turned his face up to the stream of water, as if it could wash away all the sinful thoughts about you that had begun to haunt him. That was a tragedy on its own – he never could be rid of you. You would come to haunt his dreams uninvited, invade his thoughts unwelcomed. He remembered when his interest in you had just been a mere sapling. Now it was a field of weeds, a contagion that was completely out of his control and still demanded his attention.

He shouldn’t have ignored his love when it had started to sprout, for now it had turned into obsession.

Of course, he’ll try the former way first before anything else – he would know that you wouldn’t really appreciate it if he abducted you. England would turn the charm on and boy, can he be charming when he wants to be. It wouldn’t be in grand, over the top gestures – that is for amateurs. It would come in small, effective gestures that would become bigger over time – freshly picked flowers from his garden, biscuits he made himself and then he would go over to bigger presents like a dinner in a fancy restaurant. His aim would be to have you completely smittened before he would start to cut you off from the rest of the world and to mould you into what constitutes for a perfect person.

It was a fine day; the sun painting the sky in a kaleidoscope of warm colours and caused the green of the hills to become so saturated. Or maybe it was because you were in love that the world was all the more vivid, that the air smelled sweeter and the arm that was curled around your waist felt so right.

Arthur was being charming, a good-natured smile making his sharp features softer. He had taken you out to dinner tonight, a brief affair at a rustic inn out in a no-name little village. Yet the simple meal had been the best you had had in a long time.

So, with a full stomach in satisfaction in your heart, Arthur was accompanying you back home on this summer’s evening.

“My dear, that was a very wonderful day with you”, he remarked warmly, echoing your thoughts.

“Yes, it was. You couldn’t have picked a better place to go out. I would like to do such a thing again.”

He chuckled lowly at your affirmation. “Oh, love. I wouldn’t mind doing that every day with you for the rest of our lives.”

Under other circumstances, if you weren’t so smittened with him, you would realise that what he had said couldn’t be right. Good days can’t be copy-pasted on the future forever, happiness can’t be played constantly on repeat. It has to be experienced, the cause ever varied and reinvented so that it doesn’t become dull.

Yet you weren’t not in love with him. You were neither alarmed by the clinginess the statement implied or by how sappy it was. And that was exactly what Arthur wanted.

To be clear, he wouldn’t want a weak, stupid lover. There would be nothing more off-putting to him than a whiny, spineless idiot who can’t do anything on their own. In that way, you could say he’d have high standards. He’d want somebody who is a challenge, you’d be tactful in their conduct and somebody who’d have wit to match his. Arthur has a sharp tongue and even with you he wouldn’t shy away from dispensing chidings and sharp remarks. He’d also demand you have a spine of steel, that you wouldn’t simply cave in the face of danger. If you wouldn’t have these qualities, then you’d have to adopt them, and he would be never uncompromising about that.

Ironically, while he would manipulate you into having these qualities, he wouldn’t tolerate you having them to the extent would make your relationship impossible. He wouldn’t want to be taken care of in the terms of you being the breadwinner, doing business and all that. He would want to fulfil that roles for you, whether you’re a woman or a man. It would be a chronic need to provide for you, to be the dominate one in the relationship.

You sighed for the untempt time this afternoon. No matter how much you read the page of the book, the meaning of the passages eluded you. At this point, you only had a gist of what was going on and it frustrated you to no end.

Carefully, you placed a bookmark on the page that you had been busy with and closed the hard-cover novel quietly. You knew all to well that one of the easiest ways to get Arthur in a hissy fit was to maltreat one of his books. He claimed that books had to be treated with respect, because somebody had once put a lot of effort and time into writing it. A disrespect to the book was therefore an indirect disrespect to the author.

You leaned back in your chair and stared up at the decorations of the room. Arthur of course had to live in a mansion that seemingly was a time capsule for the age of Empire. Talk about being attracted to the glorious old days.

Carding your fingers through your hair, you cursed yourself. When did you get the brilliant idea to study the classics? Oh yes, it was when Arthur mentioned the benefits of higher literature while the two you had been cleaning. He had claimed that the complex characters made the reader better at socializing, at understanding that even the most despicable characters had softer sides. That it made a person for eloquent and at understanding the nuances of reality.

And of course, since you were constantly seeking to improve yourself, you had asked him if you could peruse his library. Arthur had whole-heartedly encouraged you and you knew that he would be extremely disappointed if you abandoned this chance to grow.

So, you opened the book again and reassumed the torture.

The need for dominance would be a manifestation for Arthur’s addiction to be in control. He is sort of the opinion that power is best left in his hands, and that nobody except him can properly wield it. And if he’d have the feeling that his control over would be slipping, then he would lash out. The most physical he’d get with his punishments would be caning. All in all, punishments would always be along the lines of what detention looked like in the old public schools during the Empire.

He would also have a certain image of what intelligent would look like. That would mean restrictions in your activities: no comics, no cartoons, no fizzy drinks, god have mercy on you is you have an addiction because he would have none, he says which parties you’re allowed to go to (that would be more in the beginning of the relationship), no sleeping in, no being lazy. And if you wouldn’t conform, then he’d manipulate you into doing so.

Arthur is a man who would quickly become jealous. He’d be scared if you’d be plotting to leave him, or worse, rope other’s in into helping you plunge a knife in his back. So, he would be quick to convincing you to cut of contact with people that he wouldn’t like. This would be a win-win situation for him because the less social contact you’d have beside him, the deeper your bond with him would become. Further on in your relationship, he’d convince you to rely solely on him and that other people wouldn’t be trustworthy. That he’d be the only person that would ever truly understand you, that would have your best interests at heart, that would help you grow into the best person you could be. That the world is a shit place and that you should be grateful that he is there to shield you from it. In order to encourage that last one, he would allow you to watch the news, extensively.

If wooing you into being with him wouldn’t work, then he would coerce you into a relationship. However, he wouldn’t do anything drastic such as threatening your loved ones, rather the threats would be hidden, or he would present himself as the best option of getting you out a ditch (such as financial issues). He’d try his best to construct the situation so that you would be inclined to trick yourself into thinking you wanted it. Kidnapping would be a last resort for him.

[gloster]

FAVORITE FANFICS OF 2020

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

I know I speak for all when I say....I cannot wait to toss 2020 out the door the way Uncle Phil constantly did with Jazz. One of the things that got me through this rough year, besides family & friends & BTS, were fanfics.

It’s that time of year again where I make a list of all the fanfics that I absolutely adored. Some are by veteran favs of mine, others are new to me who just knocked it out of the park. If you’re interested in past lists, here is 2019′s list and 2018′s. If y’all are interested in doing your own fanfic favs of the year, please do so and tag me. Always on the hunt for new favs. 

So without furhter ado, my fav fanfics of 2020:

1). Another Word for Forever series by stardropdream (sheith)

Summary: Shiro knows better than to expect love in an arranged marriage. This is all for the sake of universal peace, after all, and solidifying a Terran-Galran alliance. At the very least, Shiro can hope to make a friend out of this. Becoming friends would be much easier, though, if he and his husband could actually communicate. 

With a language barrier and a mountain of cultural differences between them, getting to know Keith proves to be a challenge. Luckily, Shiro's always worked well with challenges.

2020 shockingly became the year of sheith. I ended up rewatching the show w/my bestie @littlenightdragon​. Diving more deeply into it w/my other bestie @kila09​. She and I spent the better half of this year devouring so many fanfics of them in various AUs. I came across new fanfic authors, and stardropdream is among them. 

If I could describe this series & stardropdream, I’ll take a cue from Lady Gaga: “ talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before, unafraid to reference or not reference, put it in a blender, shit on it, vomit on it, eat it, give birth to it”

This series was just PERFECTION. I’ve gotten into arranged-marriage AUs and this has been one of the best I’ve read. It was just perfection. The language barrier definitely added an extra charm to it, in which Shiro finds his own ways to get to know his husband better: both creative and funny ways. So many cute moments, so many funny moments with Hunk being the translating middle man between them, and the smut. THE SMUT. THE SMUT. THE SMUT. Just *chef’s kiss* Incredible. It was just so so sweet, and such a comfort read. I reread this series 5 times already and hope Robin (the writer) does more stories in this AU.

Please read this series. You’re not gonna regret it. It will MELT your heart. 

Honorable Mentions:

If I Called You Mine

Sail Across the Sky Just to Get to You

Finding Shelter (The Alien Baby Remix)

Say You Do(n’t)

2). The Golden Hour by @goldentruth813​ (sheith)

Summary:  After a space mission failure, Shiro loses his arm and his career. Two years later he's settled into a quiet and simple new life on his farm, but when a beautiful alien crashes in his field, he discovers the answers to his questions—and possibly the keys to his future—will come from the stars.

I’m sure no one, least of all Janel the writer herself, is surprised to see this author featured on this list. For now the 3rd year in a row. WOOOW  👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 She is the reason I got into shieth, and she just continues to put out amazing conent with them. This story by far has been the best she’s done this year-possibly one of the best ever. 

We have Shiro trying to have a simple life at the farm with his dog and animals. A curious BOM Keith who shakes things up with his boldness/innocence-and questions bound to test blood pressure, especially Shiro’s. Loads of cute moments, loads of funny moments, and also loads of oreos. 

If summary and my thoughts don’t sell you, only one thing will: reading it for yourself.

Honorable mentions:

Two Hearts in Bloom

Mountain Men

Home is in Your Heart

3). Spun like Gold by Neyasochi (sheith)

Summary: Though Shiro is currently operating his fledgling bakery business out of a decrepit food truck he got for cheap in a repossession sale, he dreams of something more: a cozy bakery and cafe on a tree-lined street somewhere, filled with the smell of fresh coffee and sugar glaze instead of diesel. A little money could go a long way to helping him get off the ground-- and luckily, Keith has money to burn.

Or: Keith takes care of Shiro’s financial woes, in exchange for a little sugar.

OMG, OMG, OMG was this story so sweet. Neyasochi already sold me with the baking/baker Shiro trope, but went a step further throwing in sugar-daddy Keith who knows his way around his manic family and cars, but when it comes to asking a cute guy out? What better way to make an impression than becoming his best paying customer?  

Honorable mentions:

oh, devour me

Healing Touch

on your hand of gold 

4). The Destiny You Sold by @tryslora​ (drarry)

Summary: In which Draco knits, Harry makes wands, and things get very tangled up between them.

If there’s one thing I love about fanfics is how they introduce you to tropes you never would consider before. Draco and knitting was a combo I didn’t realize how much I needed until now. And I love the fact knitting played a big part of the accidental bonding. Also loved the fact everyone in their friend group shipped them like crazy. Highly, highly recommend 

5) What’s My Age Again? by @lazywonderlvnd​ (drarry)

Summary: Harry Potter has had enough of pleasing the public, and his reckless tendencies are finally getting out of hand.

The Quidditch World Cup is only a week away; as Captain of the English National Team, Hermione has assured him that his immaturity won’t be tolerated by the Ministry.

And then Malfoy shows up.

(Inspired by the blink-182 song of the same name.)

It’s no secret that I’m such a fangirl of @lazywonderlvnd​. Any drarry story I read, I always love. Last year, I ADORED The Changing Lights, which was one of my favorites last year, and her updating/finishing the story was a massive highlight for me. I thank ya for that. 

This story was honestly refreshing. I’ve grown so used to Harry being responsible, always doing what’s right, that seeing a story where Harry pretty much has his middle finger in the air to “good reputation”, “being responsible,” because as he brought up: “I’m 25. I’ve been fighting all my life. I’ve earned my life to have fun.”

Okay, granted, it wasn’t quite like that but it was along those lines. And I agree. After all he went through, Harry deserves to have fun. He deserves to be reckless and make stupid decisions.

Also, it was such a blast reading a story where Harry is the brat & Draco has to keep him in line. LOVED.

Honorable mentions: 

Inside Your Mind

Aletheia

6). Chocolate and Pastry by agentmoppet, anemonen (drarry)

Summary:  When Pansy bets Draco that there is no chance he and Harry could carry out a genuine romantic relationship, he and Harry form a plan. But as their fake relationship progresses, Draco sees a side of Harry he never expected. Harry is struggling with something, pushing it far down inside him where he doesn't have to acknowledge its existence. Draco starts to worry, and then he starts to care, and then... horribly... he starts to fall in love.

Do not let the title fool you like it did me. Title alone, I was thinking it was going to be a fun, fluffy story involving baking, maybe chocolate crafting. However....it was not that at all. It was more. A lot deeper. A lot more angsty. It explored mental health, PTSD and the dangers of loved ones ignoring the signs, and contained an important message:

You can’t love someone out of their illness/disease/ addiction. Which is true and this story showed that. 

7). i’m still here by owedbetter (zutara)

Summary: "You see me."

And somehow, that makes all the difference.

If there’s one of the few good things 2020 has brought, it was Netflix bringing back ATLA to their library. Which in turn ignited my love for zutara & had me drag @kila09​ into that ship. 

This story was just incredible. The way it was written, it really felt like it could have been canon. Deleted scenes that a certain creator didn’t want us to see. The way Zuko and Katara came together, starting from their peaceful friendship after the Southern Raiders episode up, becoming closer along the way. 

I dare y’all to read this and not think OMG...is this secret canon bonus material? I definitely plan to read more by owedbetter. 

8). all the what ifs i never said by rosegardenlake (sheith)

Summary:  Keith is nine when he first notices Shiro. Shiro is gentle and quiet, always keeping to himself. Keith is rough and loud, running wherever his feet will take him, screaming on the top of his lungs into the wind. But despite that, they're a constant throughout each other's lives...if only that could be enough. As they grow, Keith just wants them both to be happy, but instead, he's falling apart.

Rosegardenlake is another sheith writer who I adored last year & adore this year as well. This was a story that I read during the beginning of quarantine-life and when I tell you the number of times Keith’s emotions of loneliness got to me, it’s a big number. 

Keith’s struggle with life after high school, after peaking in school, and his mental health reminded me too much of where I was at 2018, which wasn’t a good year for me at all, especially mentally. So that was triggering but it was also helpful since I saw how far I came. And it was beautiful seeing how far Keith came. 

Also the relationship between Shiro and Keith was just beautiful. It’s very funny how Keith was Shiro’s protector growing up and Shiro became Keith’s later on in life. There’s a chance your heart may be heavy, but will also be so swelled up with feelings these two bring it. 

Honorable mentions:

Where the Light Doesn’t Reach 

9). When Night Comes by Oh_Hey_Tae (BTS; poly ot7)

Summary: Jungkook’s tipsy, but he’s not buzzed enough to miss that he doesn’t recognize any of the four dozen people here. And seeing as his friends aren’t ones to ditch and there’s no way they’d play a prank this mean on him, Jungkook reaches the conclusion that he just walked into a stranger’s very expensive home, uninvited, and started eating their food and petting their well-dressed dog.

(Or: Jungkook shows up to the wrong Halloween party and meets the most powerful family in Seoul.)

I can easily say Oh_Hey_Tae easily one of my favorite BTS fanfic favs. Always come through with the stories, and this one was just amazing. We have Jungkook stumbling into a Halloween story, and soon enters into a intense, insane relationship with all six guys, who are already in a relationship with each other. Oh, and supernatural creatures at that. 

You do see certain relationships are stronger, deeper. For example, a lot of moments between Jin and Jungkook. Vmin has their own story and moments. But it was just so amazing. 

Fair warning. Halfway through, things get darker and Oh_My_Tae really loves playing readers diirty with the angst, but it’s so good. 

10). peace-weaver by magisterpavus (sheith)

Summary: You will be the peace-weaver, his mother told him, smiling though her dark eyes welled with unshed grief. The one who brings two bitter enemies together and ends the bloodshed and death between us, once and for all.

But men will always crave war. The Galra, most of all.

Yet another arranged-marriage AU that I loved. This particular one is well-loved in the sheith fandom. I can definitely say it’s considered one of the classic fanfics that’s been read or shared at one point or another. 

The story itself reminded me a lot of Macbeth, involving murder and dark forces at bay. The dynamics between Shiro and Keith reminded me of Drogo and Daenerys from GOT, one of my fav couples there, which only made it all the more better for me. 

I do credit the author for the creative approach they took with quintessence and Shiro’s role/persona as the Champion

Honorable mentions:

The Boy in the Window 

Sheith Demon/Priest AU

A Matter of Scale

Directive 

Honorable mentions that I seriously wanted to add to the list but this post is already lengthy. All amazing, all greats reads by various writers y’all should check out:

Hold Me Tight, or Don’t by snowfallen (yoonmin with a Mr. & Mrs. Smith AU featuring assassins and hitmen, secret identities, fake marriage, and a lot of smut)

The Prince and Pirate by Maniacani, @nerdherderette​ (drarry with a splash of royalty and pirates. Perfect if you’re needing to fill in any Pirates of the Caribbean or Black Sails cravings)

First Kisses are the Best Ones by SashaDistan (sheith in a 50 First Dates Fusion heartfelt/heart-gutting story)

freely, as men strive for right by @bixgirl1​ (drarry w/Harry explaining the many ways why Draco’s the love of his life. we love to see it)

The Sacrificed by SasuNarufan13 (sasunaru w/ dark fairytale elements similar to Little Red Riding Hood & Beauty and the beast + feat. mpreg)

Chasing Treacle Tart (and Draco Malfoy) by xErised (drarry feat. lunch lady Draco + scheming Harry + loads of fun w/sweets & more)

Red Desert by @beatitudinembty​ (taekook in a unique sci-fi AU; hard to explain but so worth a read

one way ticket to another life by starboykeith (sheith Hades x Persephone background)

Even So by lewilder (zutara; arranged marriage+ language barrier +soft strangers to lovers)

Well, lovely people, there you have it. My top 10 favorite fanfics of the year. I do notice a certain ship shows up a lot on this list, but I wasn’t kidding when I said they took over this year. Still, I tried to mix the list up with other fav ships/fandoms of mine. To the writers who created these incredible stories. I applaud you. I thank you for creating and sharing these wonderful stories. Anyone interested in doing the tag, please do. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR, GUYS

[shera-dnd]

And the first commission of the month is done! This was so much fun to write and was sincerely the silliest thing I've written in a long time. Hope you all enjoy this as much as I did.

It was a busy day around the atlesian crater, the hole left at the center of Mantle when Atlas took to the sky. All around SDC workers moved about, setting everything up for the big event. And at the center of this whirlwind of people walked two women caught in conversation.

“What I’m saying is that it would be good for both our images for the leader of the atlesian branch of the White Fang, and the head of the SDC to be seen in public together,” one woman argued, “you know, show the world that our organizations can work together to build a better future.”

“And what I’m saying, Ilia,” the second argued, “is that you don’t have to come up with an excuse for me to spend time with a friend.”

“So you’re not coming to the event with me because?” Ilia asked, earning herself an eye roll from her companion.

“Because someone has to keep everything from going up in flames,” she argued, “trust me, I’d want nothing more than to relax and enjoy some time with my friends, but I really need to keep an eye on things.”

“Seriously, Weiss?” Ilia asked, sounding more than a little annoyed, “is there no one you can trust to handle things for you?”

“Well, there is you,” Weiss mused, seeming not to notice Ilia’s quick shift through shades of pink, before settling back on her normal skin color, “but I guess that defeats the point. There is also Winter, but she’s already super busy.”

“You know what? I’m gonna figure something out,” she offered.

“Ilia, you really don’t have to.”

“I’m serious,” Ilia insisted, “you deserve a break. Let me sort things out for you.”

“Thank you,” Weiss replied, smiling at her as she pulled her into a hug, “no breaking anyone’s teeth though.”

Ilia once again went on a journey through every possible shade of pink, as she was held close. It took some focus to get her colors under control, and even more to formulate a reply.

“Hey, I only did that once!” She countered, her voice faltering for a moment.

Weiss pulled away from the hug and was about to snark back, when they were both interrupted by the sound of jets.

“Salutations!” Greeted the source of the noise. Jets of flame came out of her boots as she flew down to ground level, carrying a massive sound system on each shoulder. She gently placed both of those down, before posing proudly before the two women.

“Penny!” Weiss greeted back, walking up to talk to her, “thank you so much for the help.”

“Don’t mention it, Weiss,” Penny waved off, “you’re helping Mantle, after all, so the least I can do is help you too.”

Penny then pulled Weiss into a rib crushing hug, and over the sound of all the air leaving her lungs, Weiss could swear she heard an annoyed groan coming from Ilia. She really didn’t understand why she got like that whenever she saw them talking together.

The android eventually let Weiss go - something her lungs were grateful for - and picked up the sound systems again, “so where do you need these?”

“Over by the main tent,” Weiss informed. She waved her hand, causing a spectral knight in white armor to appear next to them, it picked up one of the sound systems from Penny and tossed it over its shoulder with ease, “and, please, let me help you.”

Ilia only tapped her foot impatiently for a moment, before adding, “I just remembered I had something to do, so I’m gonna get going now.”

“Oh, see you later then,” Weiss replied, too distracted to notice Penny playfully sticking her tongue out at Ilia, “sorry we couldn’t spend much time together.”

“It’s alright,” though Ilia was clearly talking to Weiss, she wasn’t looking at her, instead her eyes were locked onto Penny. Well...that was odd. Maybe she should ask her what that was about once they weren’t all so busy with the charity event.

With that, Weiss waved her goodbye and turned to walk Penny to where she was needed, her summon dutifully following at their side.

“Weiss, I had the most sensational idea for the charity event,” Penny commented as they walked together, “what if we auction off a little flyby through Mantle, on the arms of the Protector of Mantle herself?” She offers, pausing to flex so she can really sell her point. Not that she really had to, because Weiss loved the idea already.

“Penny, that’s perfect!” She cheered, “I already know so many people who would pay a fortune for a chance to get carried around by you.”

The android looked almost bashful at that comment, it was kinda cute, even though she was still holding a piece of equipment that weighted easily as much as her. “Maybe we can do a little demonstration flight. I can take you for a ride around town, so they know everything is safe.”

Weiss chuckled at that, “oh, don’t worry about it. You’re the Protector of Mantle, no one needs proof that they’ll be safe with you.’

“R-Right, of course,” she stammered, obviously just a sign that Penny still didn’t know how to handle this much positive attention, “so do you need me to carry anything else?”

~~~

Penny slumped onto a nearby bench, exhausted and defeated. Her many internal sensors reminded her that she was still at full aura and had enough battery life for another week before her next mandatory recharge. But it wasn’t physical exhaustion that wore her out, it was emotional.

Weiss was sweet, loving, kind, and also really damn pretty. Penny had been keenly aware of this from the moment she got accidentally tackled to the ground all those years ago. What had taken her a while to figure out was that what she felt towards her was more than just friendly affection, and by then she found out she had competition.

“No luck?” Ilia asked, she had been sitting on that bench for a while now, lazily staring off at the sky.

“No luck,��� she sighed in agreement.

The worst realization was one that came far more recently. Weiss Schnee was completely oblivious to any and all romantic approaches.

Ilia groaned loudly and leaned forward, burying her face in her hands, “how can someone so smart be so fucking stupid?”

“I don’t know,” Penny answered, leaning against Ilia. She didn’t seem to mind, she knew physical contact was how the android recharged her emotional batteries, “but it’s kinda cute.”

Ilia shot her the most infuriated glare she could manage, reds and yellows spreading through her skin...before dying down once again, “I hate that you’re right.”

“So what now?” Penny asked, ignoring the glare as she continued to lean against her.

“What do you mean ‘what now’?” She asked, sounding completely baffled, “the game is still on, Polendina. I’m still gonna spend my night with her.”

Ilia’s burst of competitive energy seemed to be contagious, because suddenly Penny felt far more energized. She jumped up to her feet and declared, “it will be a shame then that I’ll have to interrupt it to take her on a romantic flight through Mantle.”

They held an intense staredown for all of thirty seconds, before the both of them burst out laughing. Wow, they really were getting competitive over a silly crush, huh? It was so silly, but it was surprisingly fun too. Neither of them would really resent the other for ‘winning’, and they knew that, but they enjoyed keeping up the act.

“Good luck, Penny.”

“Good luck, Ilia.”

~~~

It was strange walking through the headquarters of the SDC like this. Not running from security, not stalking through the dark, just calmly walking in to see a friend. Ilia just couldn’t get used to it. All those guards just put her on edge, even if all they did now was nod politely and ask if she needed anything.

“Miss Amitola,” greeted Weiss’s secretary, “Miss Schnee is in the middle of a meeting, but she should be able to see you shortly.”

“Thanks, I’ll just wait here then,” she replied, taking a seat right outside Weiss’s office.

Gods, that was so weird.

Thankfully she soon found something to distract herself from the awkward silence of the office building. Specifically the fact that the room didn’t stay silent for much longer, because Weiss’s office walls weren’t half as thick as they should be.

“I don’t care if some rich idiots are uncomfortable!” Came Weiss’s muffled shout through her office walls, “this is about helping the faunus community living in the crater! I am not closing off the event to them!”

There was a short moment of silence, as whoever she was talking to quietly defended themself.

“Then they can go and cancel!” She shouted again, “if they don’t like being around those in need, then I don’t want them at the event!”

Ilia tried not to laugh as she watched that idiot scamper off, leaving behind a trail of “sorry, ma’am”s, “of course, ma’am”s, on his way out. Was it bad that watching Weiss verbally eviscerate a man kinda made her crush on her even more? Maybe, but Ilia didn’t care.

Deciding not to question her taste in women, Ilia simply got up and held the door before it had the chance to close behind the man. “I take it you could use some good news,” she offered.

“Please,” Weiss asked, massaging her temples.

“So I was checking on what agents we had available around Solitas,” she explained, casually walking in and taking a seat, “and I think I found someone who can take care of things for you.”

“Look, I appreciate it, but I really don’t want to outsource my responsibilities like that,” Weiss argued, “besides, I’m not gonna trust this event to someone I don’t know.”

Ilia leaned back and shrugged, “I guess I’ll have to tell our favorite Belladonna to cancel it.”

“Wait!” Weiss said, nearly doing a double take, “Blake is here?”

“She just finished a mission in Argus, and was coming over here for a visit,” she answered, “I barely said a word about the event before she offered to help.”

“Of course she did,” she sighed, “she really needs to learn to take a break.”

“And you don’t?” Ilia asked.

“I’m fine,” she insisted, only earning herself a raised eyebrow, “I’m serious!”

“Schnee,” she called, leaning forward again, and looking Weiss dead in the eye, “you’re taking a break even if me, Blake, and Penny have to carry you out of this building ourselves.”

“Fine,” Weiss crossed her arms and groaned, sliding a little down her chair as she did.

“Was it that hard?” Ilia asked, thoroughly amused by this.

“Yes,” she answered.

“Shame,” Ilia had to laugh at that, “but how about you rest, relax, and enjoy the evening with me?”

“That… that does sound nice,” Weiss agreed.

Ilia smiled, looking far too pleased with herself, and got up.

“See you at the event then.”

Ilia had barely taken a step out of the office, when her favorite android stepped in.

“Hey, Wei--Oh, Ilia!” Penny greeted, looking confused for a moment, before realizing there was only one possible reason for the faunus to look so pleased.

This time it was Ilia’s turn to stick her tongue at her.

“Penny!” Weiss cheerfully called, as she stepped out to greet her, “what are you doing here?”

“Oh, well, dad made a little extra for lunch today, and I know you haven’t had anything home made in a while, so I thought you’d appreciate a little Polendina family recipe,” she explained, gesturing towards a bag she’d been holding.

“Oh thank you,” Weiss replied, taking the bag and giving Penny a quick kiss on the cheek, “I don’t know what’d I’d do without you two.”

Ilia was somewhat annoyed that she didn’t get any kisses for her whole plan, but she still had plenty of time to work on that, and besides she was the one who scored herself a date. So suck it, Polendina.

Oh speaking of which.

“I should probably get going. I gotta go welcome Blake once she gets here,” Ilia excused herself, before adding a pointed, “see you at the event later.”

“See you there,” Weiss replied, “and give Blake a hug for me.”

“Will do,” and with that she was off.

It didn’t take long for her to hear heavy metal steps catching up to her.

“Did she say yes?” Penny asked.

“She did,” Ilia answered, turning around to look at her, “ready to admit defeat?”

“Never!”

“Well, I’m the one with a date tonight, not you, so suck it tin can!” Ilia taunted.

And Penny let out a loud gasp, covering her mouth with her hand. “Ilia!”

Ah crap, did she cross a line?

“Shit, I didn’t mean it like that,” Ilia apologized in a panic, “I’m so sorry.”

Penny’s look of offense and horror quickly melted away into a fit of giggles. Oh she did not just do that just to mess with her! How dare she!?

“Oh, you little shit,” Ilia accused, but any menace in her tone was completely undermined by her skin shifting an embarrassed pink.

That stupid robot somehow thought that meant it was okay to give her a hug. It wasn’t, and her getting pinker didn’t mean shit.

The two gay idiots bickered for a little while longer, thinking it was just the two of them in the halls of the SDC, before taking their leave. But there was someone there, pearing just outside the office doors, watching this all unfold.

~~~

The event had finally begun. The Crater Community Charity Event, organized by the SDC for raising funds to help improve the infrastructure of the neighborhoods in and around the atlesian crater. Since those neighborhoods were majority faunus, the White Fang took particular interest in making sure the event went well, and that the charity was well funded. Which is why no one seemed surprised that the leader of the local branch was walking around like she owned the place.

Not that some of the rich bastards didn’t glare at her as she walked by, still mistrustful of her and her organization. But what were they gonna do? Kick her out? Those assholes barely had the guts to do more than glare, especially when she was accompanied by the woman running this event.

Weiss seemed to delight in that, the act of infuriating so many terrible people simply by enjoying herself, and knowing that these people could do nothing to stop her. It was a level of pettiness that Ilia couldn’t help but respect.

Though unfortunately the head of the SDC was far more perceptive to angry glares than she was to loving glances, or perhaps she would have noticed how Ilia had looked at her that entire evening. No matter, they were still enjoying their date, even if it was more a friend date between gal pals, than an actual romantic one.

“Hey, Weiss,” Ilia called, just loud enough that Weiss could hear it, but hopefully nobody else, “I really appreciate getting to spend time with you today.”

“Ilia, you’re my friend,” she answered, “you don’t have to thank me for something like that.”

Gods, this girl was oblivious.

“I’m serious,” she insisted, “it means a lot. I really do enjoy your company, and I...and I…”

Before she could find her words, a bright green light streaked across the sky above them and landed nearby. Oh, just what Ilia needed right now...

Weiss gasped, “the auction is about to start!”

And next thing Ilia knew she was getting dragged along through the crowd towards where several rich weirdos gathered. At the center of it all was Penny Polendina, posing like a superhero straight out of a comic, as Blake Belladonna announced the auction. The right to a flight through Mantle in her strong robot arms.

It didn’t take long for the bids to skyrocket higher than Penny herself could, as many rich idiots offered to pay exorbitant amounts of money for the right to get bridal carried through the sky. Well at least this was all going to faunus communities in need.

As more people made their bids Ilia noticed just how few of them were men. Most of the people willing to pay for that flight were women, some of them just for the thrill of the flight, some clearly sapphics, and some in even clearer denial. For a moment there, when they were deep in the five digit territory, it seemed like a member of team denial was about to get her win. An older rich woman, obviously displeased with her husband, and about a light breeze away from a proper gay awakening.

But she was denied that when Weiss shouted, “a hundred thousand lien!”

Ilia’s heart sank and the crowd went quiet. Lady Denial nudged her husband a few times and they seemed to have a quiet argument, before she resigned herself to her defeat. Well, at least Ilia wasn’t the one most disappointed by this turn of events.

“What are you doing!?” She hissed at Weiss.

“I’m winning you a date,” Weiss whispered back.

“You’re what!?”

“I saw you talking to Penny after you left the office, you don’t have to hide it, Ilia,” Weiss said, somehow thinking that explained anything.

“What!?”

“Come on, the moment she giggled you turned pinker than I’ve ever seen you,” Weiss continued, and Ilia was pretty sure she was about to pop a blood vessel, “and the way you’ve been looking at her all the time. You have the most obvious crush ever.”

So that’s how Ilia found herself being flown high over Mantle, in the arms of her romantic rival. The flight had been completely silent, neither really wanting to talk about this turn of events, or even acknowledge that it was happening. This was the stupidest way this night could have possibly gone.

“I think we should tell her,” Penny eventually said.

“Yes, yes we should,” Ilia was forced to agree.

~~~

“Weiss!” She heard Ilia call, along with the sound of Penny’s jets, “we need to talk!”

Weiss turned around right on time to catch Penny land and gently help Ilia stand.

“Well, you two are back early,” she commented, “did something happen?”

“Yes,” they both answered at the same time. Oh? That wasn’t a good sign.

“Weiss, we know you’re just trying to be a good friend,” Penny began, trying to soften the blow of Ilia’s clear annoyance.

“But this is really getting absurd,” Ilia continued.

Weiss blinked a few times, “I’m confused, what’s going on?”

Ilia and Penny looked at each other for a moment, they gestured a few times as if silently arguing over something, before Penny stepped forward.

“Ilia isn’t crushing on me,” she finally spoke, though she needed a deep breath before continuing, “she’s crushing on you, and so am I.”

“Excuse me!?” Weiss blurted, looking completely befuddled.

Ilia sighed and took this as her cue to step in, “we like you, damn it! We’ve been trying to tell you for ages, but we couldn’t get you to take a hint!”

“So all those times you’ve both been really insistent on helping me or spending time with me…”

“It was a display of romantic feelings, yes.” Penny answered with an energetic nod.

“And you guys kept staring at each other, and snarking…”

“It was us getting competitive,” Ilia explained, “playfully,” she added.

“Huh,” she responded, a tiny humorous smile forming on her face, as if she had finally understood the punchline to a joke, “so I take it you two expect me to choose one of you now?”

“That would be preferable,” Penny answered.

Weiss seemed to ponder for a moment, looking between the two of them as if she was weighing the pros and cons of each option.

“Both,” she declared.

“Both!?” They echoed.

“Yes, both.”

“Is that an option?” Penny asked, appearing very confused.

“If you’re both okay with that,” Weiss answered, with a tiny shrug.

“Oh, of course the privileged little Schnee would go and choose to have everything,” Ilia complained.

“Is that a no?” Weiss asked, sounding almost like a challenge.

“Of course it isn’t!” She yelled back, pinks shooting all over her hair as she walked up to her and took her hand.

Penny practically flew as she went to grab the other one, happily giggling the whole time.

Weiss smiled, kissed them both on the cheek, and walked back to the charity event with both girlfriends in hand.

[herstroywritten]

Magix Inn: One bed, one shirt, two idiots in love

OK. Confession time: I LOOOVE tropes. All of them. The oh I’m so cold and I don't have a jacket, so you gave me yours. Oh no, we’re paired together and I don’t like that. Oh look, we have to stay in this hotel together and (*cure shocked face*) there’s only one bed! All of it. Like, ALL of it. And when it’s done well... Ughhh, my heart can barely stand it. (If you want an A+++ example of it, go ahead and read Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo and watch the new Shadow and Bone adaptation on Nextflix. Helnik serves all the tropes in all the best ways.) Anyways, my point is that that’s all this is, and I am fully aware of that. I needed more of these tropes with Rivusa, so here we are. Enjoy.

She's going to kill them. Every single one of them. And she was going to make it as painful and slow and agonizing as she could. Now that she knew how to extract mind control, she figured she could easily learn how to enact it. She would learn to do it overnight. She would! And she would most definitely use it on every single one of her suitemates, no moral obligations holding her back. In fact, she was doing them a favor by not opting to do it with her knives, the ones she'd begun training with a month ago or so. She was going to do it, no hesitation- 

"You can take the bed."

Riven's words snapped her out of her fantasies. She forced herself to finally turn and stare at him. He was already standing in the middle of the room they had been assigned. The room that had a single king sized bed in the middle of it. There was a small window on each side of the head board, with thick tattered curtains covering the view of the barren land outside. A couch was positioned to the right of the bed, a door stood just a few feet above it. There was no dresser in the room, no closet. 

Not exactly a five star hotel, she thought to herself. But then again, they were in hiding from a psychopath who thought herself to be the future ruler of the world, not on vacation. The cracks on the walls and the dust that could be seen covering every surface fit the murderous mood of their escape so much more than a nice cozy bedroom. 

Musa wondered how Stella was holding up. Bitterly, she hoped that she was hating it. Served her right for leaping at the chance to spend the night with her ex-bodyguard instead of opting to share with one of the girls. 

It had been a long night of traveling and by the time Dowling, Silva, and Harvey had finally located their destination, the whole group was practically a squad of walking zombies struggling to maintain awareness long enough to not fall asleep while standing up. After escaping Alfea, they had trekked through the woods continuously for 36 hours straight, needing to get as far away from the school as possible without using magic for fear of giving away their plan. 

Their little group had been led by Professor Harvey, who somehow knew exactly where they were headed without using a map to navigate through the veils of greenery that they had bypassed. How, Musa wasn't sure. It all looked the same to her, and quite frankly after a while she seriously considered the possibility that they were just walking in circles. Sam and Terra had followed behind their father, pointing out harmful weeds to avoid touching or stepping on for the rest of the group. The rest of the girls had followed their orders, Bloom and Sky leading the charge, then Brandon and Stella, Aisha, Musa, and Riven. Dowling and Silva followed a few feet behind, making sure that no one was following them as they went. Needless to say, the journey had been endless and there seemed to be no end in sight. The students had been unsure of where they were headed, as the professors had refused to divulge any sort of extra information unless it was explicitly necessary.

In the end, they had walked out of the woods and into an abandoned city. White bricks and cracked cement littered the ground that they passed through, exerting great effort to not step on any broken shards of glass and cut themselves. 

"Aster Dell" Bloom had whispered when she had seen the jagged outline of the town. Professor Harvey had nodded his head at her words, verifying their truth, and that had been that. No one spoke and no one asked the millions of questions that swarmed their minds. How were they able to see this place? Wasn't Queen Luna supposed to have it covered up? Why were they even here? Wasn't this a little too obvious of a hideout? Musa's curiously was running high, but her desire to just sleep was even greater so she had just followed right along as the professor led them through winding streets and in front of a rundown building that seemed to barely be holding onto its hinges.

Dowling had broken the silence, "Welcome to Magix Inn, or what's left of it. We'll make camp in here for the night."

Turns out Magix Inn was just that, and inn. And a tiny one at that, just ten boarding rooms to offer. Each boasted a king sized bed and minimal furniture. Unfortunately, the four rooms located on the south side of the building had been completely destroyed in the wreckage, so they were left with six to pick from. Dowling and Silva had taken the one at the very beginning of the eastern hallway, for security measures. For that same purpose, Professor Harvey had taken the one at the very end of the corridor, and Sam joined him. Sky had insisted he stay with Bloom for the night, attached to her as he had been for the last 36 hours, fearing that she would lose control of her magic again. No one bothered to mention that there was nothing he could really do if that happened again, they just let the couple slip into the room diagonal from Dowling and Silva's. Their door had barely closed before Stella had basically dragged Brandon into the room next to theirs, shouting over her shoulder "Good night everyone!" That left Aisha, Terra, Musa, and Riven. And two rooms. There had been an awkward silence, during which the girls looked back and forth between the three of them, daring each other to make the first move. When Aisha scooted slightly closer to Terra, Musa knew she was about to lose. Frustrated, angry, and just plain tired, she'd huffed and spun around to face the devil himself.

"Well, would you look at that?" Riven's grin was basically a smirk as he cocked his eyebrows in her direction, eyes roaming up and down the whole of her, his usual form of acknowledgement when it came to her. "Looks like we're playing roomies for the night." For some reason, he did not sound very disappointed at that idea. 

"Not another word," Musa had growled at him, before making her way to the room second to last from the end of the hallway. In any other scenario, she would be happy that he was choosing to speak to her again but right now she couldn't be bothered.

And now, here they were. In a room. Alone. With one bed. Two sets of curtains. A couch that was definitely too small for either of them to sleep in comfortably. One door that led to the bathroom. Oh, and did she mention the one bed? 

She finally stepped away from the doorway, letting the heavy wooden door lock behind her. As she crossed the room and headed for the bed, she couldn’t help but notice the dust that kicked up at her feet as she walked on the oriental rug that had to have existed for at least 16 years and who knows how much longer before then. The idea of sleeping here was almost revolting, but at this point she would give anything for a place to lay down, so whatever. They'd fought monsters and survived, they could outlive a bit of dust. What she might not be able to outlive, however, was sharing a room with the specialist standing behind her.

She dropped her backpack on the bed, choosing to ignore the dust that resurfaced with the motion, and turned to face him. 

"Yeah, no. As much as I would love to watch you try to squeeze into that tiny little couch, it would be extremely cruel of me to make you do that after a day and a half of constant walking. Plus, it's a king sized bed. I don’t need all of it. We'll just share." She hoped that came out as causal as it sounded in her head.

Riven's smirk, the one that hadn't left his face since the sleeping arrangements had been decided, grew even wider at her words. "I suppose, if you insist. An Alfea gentleman would never ignore a lady's wishes, after all." 

She scoffs at him. "I doubt you would count among the gentlemen of Alfea."

"Oh, I don't know. I've been told I have a way of outdoing myself when it comes to ladies' requests. Especially in the bedroom." He's eyeing her from the corner of his sightline as he makes for the bed, dropping his own bag diagonally from hers. She's suddenly flushed, from anger or blushing she's not sure. But she's not about to give him any ideas.

"We are not, I repeat NOT, completing any sort of requests tonight." She narrows her eyes at him, her voice strong and unwavering. It surprises her, the sheer strength behind those words because honestly it's the opposite of what she wants to say. The opposite of what she wants to do.

"Whatever you say." His statement is short, filled with hidden messages. He shuffles through his bag as she shuffles through her thoughts, watching him and biting her tongue so that all her questions don't come tumbling out. 

He heads for the bathroom, and once she hears the door close, she pulls out her phone.

"Hello!" Aisha's voice is all cheer and chuckle on the other side of the line. Musa thinks she can hear Terra's giggle in the background, too. 

"I'll kill you." Musa's reply is a lot less cheery and a lot more lethal.

"Oh, come on!" It's Terra's voice this time. "We're practically doing you a favor. You should be thanking us."

"I'll kill you. All of you." She repeats it, just to make sure they're really catching it.

"Musa, love, you know this has to happened at some point." Aisha's words are calm. "We're headed into a war. We're running away from school. We're going to have a lot more shit to deal with in a couple of hours, and you're still not in the right mindset for all of it. You’re in a completely different world. If you're so worried about it, just ask him. Better yet, just tell him."

"I don't know what you're talking about, " Musa mumbles angerly.

The sighs that she hears from the other side of the conversation tell her just how little Aisha and Terra believe her. It's silent for a second, and Musa can just feel the two girls going back and forth on who's turn it is to confront her. Terra's sweet voice comes through the phone after a few seconds, "Musa, we're not going to tell you what to do. It's not our place. But we will tell you what we see, because you're our friend and we love you and want you to be happy-"

"Terra, we're heading for a war. There is no happy in war." Musa's voice is monotone. 

"Musa," her name is a warning on Terra's lips, a sign that she's used this excuse before and it hasn't worked. "Look, I know you like him. I know it's weird between you two. You had to go digging into his brain to break him out of a spell and he didn't appreciate that, but quite frankly, I don’t think he appreciated being Beatrix's little pet and Rosalind's spy either. So he can be bitter and mad about it all he wants, you did what you had to do to save his ass and ours."

"That's the problem though. He's no longer mad about it. At least, I don’t think he is. He's talking to me. Like, now that we’re in the room. He hadn't even looked at me since the I broke that stupid spell…" Her voice drops at that last sentence. 

"That's good. Right?" Aisha's voice is a mix of encouragement and confusion. 

"Since when are you in on this, Aisha? I thought you hated the guy?" Now Musa's just curious. How did they even get into this situation in the first place? How did she get here, sharing a room with a boy that has one too many demons on his shoulders and whom she's embarrassingly crushing on?

Aisha's reply is quick and defensive. "Oh, I still do. But, he's still Sky's bff or whatever and he's still your…" There's a pause that follows that particular thought and Musa takes the time to wonder how Aisha is going to finish that sentence.  "You know what, I don't really know what he is. But he helped you train and you two had something going before, well, before he started disappearing to go do Rosalind's dirty business. Plus, for some unknown, godforsaken season, you're into him. As your friend and roommate, I feel the need to support all your dumb choices, within reason of course. So, yeah. I guess I'm in on whatever this is too."

"You sound like Stella." Musa's mouth quirks into a smirk as she picks up Aisha's groan from across the line.

"Don't remind me. Pretty soon, I'll start swooning over ex-bodyguard-turned-teammate Brandon too." They all get a laugh out of that line.

"God, I'd pay to see that. Poor guy has his work cut out for him, I wonder what they're doing right now." Terra's inquiry needs no answer, but Musa feels the need to comment on the situation at hand. 

"I can't believe she did that! She just left us! You know what, she's the first one I'm killing. You two can pick between second and third place."

Aisha chuckles at her words before a yawn overtakes her and she replies, "Alrighty, it's bed time. We've got a long day tomorrow. And, Musa, just do it. Just talk it out and get it off your chest. You don't want to leave things unsaid, not when we don't know what tomorrow brings. You've already played that game before and it was not fun." Aisha's right, of course. Musa has played that game before.

Right before Riven disappeared, they had been training together for a while, which had somehow turned into them having lunch together on the daily, which had then turned into secret meetings at night in the greenhouse. They'd both needed some alone time, to catch their breath and just marvel at their messed up lives and all the fucked up shit that was going on. And for some reason, his little quips and their constant banter had become her new safety net, a web of comfort and solace, something she hadn't had since Sam and her started drifting apart. But unlike Sam, who was all calming waters and steady footing on a gentle boat, Riven had been all of the tumultuous oceans in the worst of weathers. She never really found her footing in the storm that was Riven and his thoughts, and that had brought her a comfort like no other. In a world where all they had was scheduled to the minute thanks to Rosalind's insane regime, his inconsistent thoughts had drawn her in. She'd wanted to break him open, tuck herself into the blanket that was his mind, and lay there until his emotions numbed both her and him. And, then, somewhere between aching to be numb and heavy innuendos, she had found herself staring at him more often than she should and thinking about him in ways she knew would do her no favors if she let them continue. But, she let them continue. And pretty soon, his loud emotions weren't just comfort and she didn't just want to drown in them. No, at that point, she had wanted to dive deeper into them so that she might try and shift through them. Try to untangle his deepest fears and settle them. To mold her own pain into the shapes that formed the cracks of his heart, so that she could somehow fit him and be a comfort for him in the same way he was for her. She'd wanted it so bad. So, so very bad. And she'd almost said so, too. Too bad Rosalind had chosen that day to start using the spell she had placed on him months before.

Aisha's voice pulls Musa away from her own thoughts. "Hey, Musa? You still there?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, sorry. Just dozing off a bit, it's been a long day."

"Ugh, tell me about it. Look, if you two won't talk it out for yourselves, do it for us. We're all on edge with all the sexual tension that's coming off of you two."

"Aisha!" Terra's voice sounds horrified. "Actually, she's not wrong. As Stella so kindly suggested, you two might want to just fuck it out. See if that helps break the ice."

It's Musa's turn to be horrified now. "Terra! You did not just say that! And we are NOT fucking anything out!" 

Her friends, however, don't give her the satisfaction of listening to her defense. "Goodnight Musa!" And with that the phone call ends and she's left listening to silence and feeling even more agitated than she did when she first called them. She screams and throws her phone across the bed, watching as it haphazardly hangs from the corner of the white duvet. 

"Now what's all this about fucking?" Riven's voice nearly sends her digging her own grave. Great. Just great. Of course he chooses now to make his way back into the room.

"Nothing." Her rely drips in venom as she makes a point to angerly dig into her bag and pull out her toiletries. She pushes past him and into the bathroom before he gets the chance to question her again. She worked quickly to strip herself of the heavy layers she had on, and into a long white t-shirt that she often wears to bed. She had forgotten to pack a pair of shorts, as she usually just took them off and slept in her underwear. For a second she considered wearing jeans to bed, but she decided she wasn't about to sweat to death for Riven's sake. He'd seen naked girls before. Plus, if it wasn't jeopardizing her modesty, she doubted it was harming his innocence.

When she came out, however, she started to question her decision. The second she stepped out of the bathroom, Riven's voice greeted her.

"So, now that you're done hiding," he started, scrolling through his phone in nothing but a set of sweatpants. "Do feel free to explain to me who's fucking who, besides Brandon and Stella." He'd looked up then, and that had been their demise. His eyes had gone to her face first, but she'd watched as they moved downward in a slow motion, as if he was committing every bit of her body to memory.  She understood now why girls raved about him, because if he gave them all that look… well, Musa supposes they would all feel exactly how she is feeling right about now. 

Oh, for god's sake. Why her? 

She waits for the comment she knows is coming.

"Please tell me you're not planning on sleeping in that." Well, that's not what she expected.

"What?" She raises an eyebrow at him.

"You need to put on something else if we're really not completing any requests tonight." He's still staring at her legs as she chokes a laugh at him and makes her way to her side of the bed.

"Get your head out of the getter, idiot. I can sleep in whatever I want and you can handle yourself. You'll be fine." 

"I know you can sleep in whatever you want. Me controlling myself, that's where our issues start, love. You have a little too much faith in me." He catches her eyes and quirks an eyebrow her way as she shuffles to unhook her bra from behind and slips it off under the shirt she's wearing before throwing it on top of her other clothes. "For fuck's sake, are you serious right now?!" Honestly, she was going to keep the bra on before she saw his reaction to her bare legs, but at this point they’re so far in over their heads that she might as well pull out all the stops. His continuous reactions are just icing on top of the cake.

"Oh, absolutely." She's smirking at him, eyes dancing with mischief as he stares at her full of lust. She laughs as she tucks herself into the covers. "Relax, I'll keep my underwear on." His face is heating up, frustration evident in the line between his brows and she longs to reach over the expanse of the duvet and press her thumb to the space between his eyebrows and smooth it out. She doesn't. 

"This isn't fair," he protests.

"Says the guy who's shirtless right now," comes her reply.

"That's not the same thing and you know it." His voice is strained and she's eager to see when it'll snap, when one of them will finally just admit defeat.

"Isn't it? The feminist in me disagrees."

"Don't. Don't you dare take that stupid shirt off." His hands are shaking as he points a warning finger her way, and she laughs. She's enjoying this way too much. But she knows if she keeps it up, he'll keep true to his word and she won't push him away, and frankly that thought should scare her. Instead, she finds herself wondering how many buttons she can push before he caves.

"Turn off the lights and come to bed Riven." Her voice is light now, no longer teasing. He watches her snuggle further into the covers, eyebrows still furrowed at her and she can practically hear the turmoil in his mind. "Ugh, honestly, calm the fuck down. Your emotions are so intense right now, it's hurting my brain. I promise I'll keep the shirt on. Now, come on. Come to bed."

He mumbles something about staying out of his mind, but he closes the small lamp by his bedside and crawls into bed beside her. Well, calling it beside her is a bit of a stretch as he's practically at the edge of the huge bed. She huffs at his child-like manner and rolls her eyes at him.

"Seriously, Riven? I thought you'd be jumping at the chance to get a girl into bed and here you are avoiding me like the plague. You know I don't bite, right?"

"Whatever," he mumbles. She finally turns to face him, reaches her arms across the mattress and digs her fingers into the waistband of his sweats, tugging him closer to the center of the bed. He jumps at the feel of her hands on his bare stomach, his breath catching at this throat as they now stand face to face and mere inches away from each other. She watching his eyes as they take her in, and she's vaguely aware of the fact that this is too intimate. This moment is exactly what she was trying to avoid, but she can't bring herself to care. So, instead she takes this time to study the green of his eyes. In the dark, they're illuminated by the thin sliver of moonlight the peeks from between the curtains of the window on her side of the bed. They're dilated, more black than green, but she can just make out the color around the edges or his iris. Hazel on the inside, and impossibly green on the outside ridges. She remembers when she was younger, she'd once told her mother that she wanted interesting eyes, by which she meant she wanted blue or green eyes. Something other than her brown orbs. In a way, she was vainly excited when her powers had come in and her eyes started to glow lavender and purple. How naïve she had been, how stupid. She knows now, looking into Riven's eyes, that interesting eyes had no color attached to them. Interesting eyes were ones that held stories, emotions. And Riven's eyes held so many stories, and so many emotions. They gave him away, at least to her they did. She swears that even without her powers, she would be able to feel the pain, the hurt, the mischief, and (right now) the undeniable want by just looking into his eyes. The want is especially pungent. She hopes he can see the want in her eyes too. She bitterly thinks to herself that her girls are right, the two of them are hopeless. They've been cascading through this thing between them, her and Riven, and after she broke his mind control, he'd refused to look her in the eye, let alone talk to her. 

They stand face to face with each other for a while, before she finally ducks her head below his chin and tucks herself against his collarbone. She feels him tense below her (feels her own breath catch, fearing that he'll push her off) before he relaxes a little and his breathing slows down. She listens to his heart beating beneath her, and the pounding of it against her ear lulls her mind into a peaceful state. Once she feels like she can finally breathe normally again, she works up the nerve to ask him the questions she's been meaning to ask for about two days now. 

"Are you angry?"

He pulls away from her, just enough to look down at her. But she won't look at him. Instead, she traces his collarbone with the tips of her fingers, burning holes into it with the intensity of her gaze. 

"Angry?" He sounds genuinely surprised. 

"Yeah," her reply comes in a whisper. Tears are welling in her eyes, but she refuses to let them slip as she continues to bore into his skin. 

"Why would I be angry?" 

"Don't." She doesn't want to say it. Doesn't want to be sorry for what she did, because she's not. She's not.

"Don't what?"

"Don't make me say it." It's a whimper this time, her voice threatening to crack along with her heart.

"Musa," he lifts her chin up. "What is going on? Why would I be angry at you?" She stares into his eyes again and curses the gods above for making her do this.

"Because I had to go into your mind. I had to dig around and manipulate it. I know you've never liked that about my powers. I know that it's no better than what Rosalind and Beatrix did to you. I know that, but I'm not sorry. I'm not sorry, Riven." She says it as though she's trying to convince herself. A deep breath, and then she's talking again. "I'm not sorry because it freed you. So, I'm not sorry about my powers or about what I did." She notices the line between his brows growing more and more as she speaks, and this time she does reach across the space between them and smooth it out with the pad of her fingertip.

She's not expecting an answer, but she was hoping for one. And as the silence between them grows, she figures she has overstayed her welcome. 

As she moves away from him, his arms snap into motion. They wrap around her waist, pulling her back into him. She squeezes her eyes shut as his scent engulfs her once again. 

"I'm not angry." His words, mumbled against her hair, are the final straw. Her tears come ripping through her body, unwelcome but inevitable. She hates this, hates crying. She's not a quiet crier. When she cries, her whole body cries with her. She shakes, she hiccups, and her breathing speeds up. There's no way he doesn't feel it. 

"Musa, really, I'm not angry. And hey," he's pulling away again, gently pushing her back so he can look at her face when he says the next words. "For the record, you are NOTHING like them. Nothing. Do you hear me?" She hiccups and looks down. "You're not. I swear to you, Musa. You're not. And, just so you know, I don't hate your powers. Never have, never will." 

"But you said-"

"I know what I've said. It wasn't because I hate you, it was because I hate my own mind." He pauses, looks away from her as if trying to work up the courage to continue. "Sometimes…  a lot of the time… I can't stand myself. What I hated was the idea of anyone, especially you, seeing all my bad parts. And fuck, Musa, there are so many shitty parts of me. So, so many. I mean, I've been helping Rosalind execute a war for months. Fuck." He chuckles a laugh with no humor behind it, looks up to the ceiling. "Fuck. I'm so fucking broken, Musa. And the idea that you felt that. God, I don't know…"

She watches him struggle, feels his inner turmoil. She finds herself wanting to sort out his feelings for him, mend his aches.

"Is that why you keep pulling away? From me, I mean?" She needs to know. She can't be imagining this thing between them, can't be the only one with her heart on the line right now. He moves so that he's looking at her again, but doesn't answer her right away.

"You're good, Musa. You're so fucking good. Nothing about you is bad. You're good, and you're smart, and you're fucking gorgeous." She feels her heart flutter at his words, her hopes taking flight and jumping to the sky. She wants to scream with joy, wants to kiss him. But his words are laced with a treacherous kind of tone, she can feel the desperation in him, and just as quickly as her excitement came, it leaves.

"I can't do this, Musa. I can't do it. Not to you. You deserve better than this." He's pulling away, and her heart is sinking.

"Better than what?" She sits up as he gets out of the bed. He walks to the end of the bed, looks at the door that leads to the hallway. She can feel him pulling away, wanting to leave.

"Better than what, Riven?" She's louder this time, angry that he's pulling away again after all she's told him.

"Me!" The intensity of his voice causes her to jump back. "Ok? Better than me!" His body is shaking, and so is hers. Because honestly, how dare he?

"And who are you to decide what I deserve?"

"Fuck, Musa. We're not doing this. We're not playing at this game." She feels like she's being scolded, as though she's a child he's refusing to answer to. 

"You don’t get to decide what I deserve, Riven. And you sure as hell don't get to decide what I want-"

"And what do you want, Musa?" His words stop her. "What do you want? Because I have been racking my brain for so fucking long trying to figure out what it is you want. And as much as I think I have you figured out, I can't possibly be right."

She runs the question through her mind a couple of times, questioning how to answer him. She's tired of lying. Tired of wanting him when he's scared to want her back, of constantly being on edge around him. So she decides she might as well tell him. "You. I want you."

"No, you don’t." Fuck him.

"Yes, I do!" She's angry now.

"No."

"Yes!"

"Musa, no."

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?! Are we really doing this right now? Are we arguing about this like middle schoolers? You asked what I want. And I want you!"

"No, Musa, you don't."

"Why is it so fucking hard for you to accept it?! I want you and that's the end of it." She getting angrier as they keep going, and it furthers her anger that he's so calm about it. 

"You can't want me, Muse. You can't." The despair that she feels from him is intense and it, along with his nickname for her, knocks the breath out of her.

"What do you mean I can't want you?" She's trying to keep her voice down, fully aware of the thin walls and the fact that everyone else is probably asleep by now.

"Just… I'm not good. Not in the way the rest of you are. I'm a walking mess and I can't do anything without fucking it up." His voice is small and Musa can see the broken boy behind the persona he's managed to construct for himself.

"But I do, Riven."

"Why?" A broken question. 

She mulls it over in her head, chuckling. "Because, Riv, you've never been able to walk away from me and I've never been able to let you. We play games, you and I." They do. They ring around the rosies, a pocket full of kisses just waiting to spill out of their carefully constructed gates. "We circle one another, Riv, until we're both dizzy with desire and want and fear and fatigue… but we never break the circle. We never stray off path. You lean forward and I lean in, ready to give you my all, and then you pull back. And then we go back to the circle." It's a long metaphor and honestly she's not exactly sure if she's getting her point across. He watches as she pushes herself to her knees on the bed, shuffling closer to him with every word. 

"The circle is our game, Riven. You run, I chase. I run, you chase." She reaches for his hand. "I've never wanted to lose a game so badly." His eyes are on her as she pulls him back onto the bed. She leans in slowly, making sure that she maintains eye contact with him the whole time. She wants him to know she means it, all of it. She's not going anywhere. Her fingertips trace their way up his stomach, chest, neck, winding into his hair. They're millimeters away, noses pressed against each other, breaths mingling.

"Your move, Riv." And she feels her words break his concentration, just as his hands snap up to her body. It’s a quick movement, but his hands etch a trail of fire on her as the move roughly from her knees to the back of her thighs, up her back, and to the junction of her shoulders. When their lips finally meet, it’s anything but gentle. He bites at her lip, she gasps against him, and he takes the chance to tug on her bottom lip. She can't help the moan that leaves her, thoughts of the others already asleep leaving her mind as he does things with his tongue she didn't know were possible. He moves to her jaw, kissing his way downward as she cranes her neck back so that he has all the space he needs to do whatever he's planning on doing. She doesn't know what he's aiming for, but she knows what she wants him to do. She lets her hands fall to his pants, tugs them down. He moans against her collarbone and she swears she's going insane. She's burning but she's also shivering. She can't breathe and yet she feels like she's breathing for the first time in her life. 

"Shirt," she gasps. And then it's off of her, the one thing that he swore needed to stay on her if they were going to make it through the night. 

They spend the night doing everything they've avoided doing for months. He fills the silence with whispers of how gorgeous she is, and she feels her heart burst at its seams. They don't sleep, and she doesn't want to. This is better than sleep, she's never felt more awake than when he's tracing the lines of her body. 

He's resting on her chest, arms slung over her body as his fingertips play with the ends of her hair, when it hits her.

"I'm going to have to tell the girls that we did fuck it out." And as much as she hates the idea of her roommates being right, she thinks that maybe his laugh makes it all worth it.

[seokmingiggles]

rainbow.

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x female reader

Genre: angst, some scattered fluff, established relationship, soulmate!au (where you can see colour from the moment you meet your soulmate).

5.96k words

Warnings: brief mention of alcohol consumption, [spoilers: unmentioned illness (however, I allude to Lymphoma [a type of cancer] that has spread to other areas), major character death.]

There are countless tales of the lengths people go to when finding their soulmate, yet significantly fewer of the aftermath. You thought your life began when fate led you to your soulmate, but why does it feel like it’s ending all of a sudden?

Alternatively, not all wishes come true. Even when Jungkook tries to convince you otherwise.

A/N: This piece is likely going to be my last longer one for a while as I’m returning back to school for my winter semester. Expect my updates to be significantly more sparse than they have been for the past few weeks. Other than that, I’m so glad I began to post my writings online. It’s still bizarre to me that actual people are reading them?? If you enjoy (or have constructive criticism for) any of my pieces, please, never be shy to let me know!! I absolutely adore hearing your opinion on what I’ve created. With that said, gosh, I cried while doing my research to write this one.

If you are looking for a cute, fluffy soulmate!au, this may not be a suitable fic for you. Yes, there are some fluffy moments, but it overall contains heavy themes that may be triggering to some. If you’re looking for a fluffy soulmate!Jungkook drabble, the first portion of 1k words contains no angst, along with the three italicized sections.

•• Your soulmate. Soulmate. Even the word sounded magical; a mate bound to your soul.

Growing up, you were the cliché little girl who would endlessly dream about seeing colour for the first time at the instant your eyes locked with a certain someone across the room. Just imagining some above force drawing you to them sounded magical.

And, to a certain extent, it did happen that way when you met yours.

Not-exactly in the storybook-way you pictured, but you felt strangely drawn to a particular boy back in your second year of university. Your childhood friend, Chaeyoung, had convinced you to attend some end-of-semester party on campus. To be fair, that's where you met your other closest friend to this day.

The boy was sat on a couch, looking uninterested and unimpressed by the events happening around him. Chaeyoung, as much as you love her, had run off with another one of her classmates, leaving you floundering in the pool of sweaty bodies and loud music. So, you made your way to the sofa and sat next to the expressionless boy, who you came to know as Yeosang.

You didn't expect him to begin talking to you with the blank gaze he was displaying prior to you taking a seat, but you're happy it turned out that way. After that party, Yeosang joined your duo with Chaeyoung; the three of you would come to have plenty of fun together.

Though, it was at that same party where you also met Jungkook.

After chatting with Yeosang for who knows how long, your small bladder eventually needed relief from the few drinks you had. You excused yourself and wandered around the unfamiliar house in search of a bathroom. It was a large space with multiple floors, perhaps belonging to one of your campus fraternities, but you found yourself walking like you knew exactly where to go.

You ended up upstairs, where it was significantly more quiet than the bustling main floor. Only a few scattered couples kissing in the hallways or leading another to someone's bedroom crossed your path.

You managed to find a vacant washroom, much to your delight. But upon opening the bathroom door after you had finished, you were met with a handsome—albeit unfamiliar—face.

And also with a flood of colour for the first time in your life.

You and the stranger were both dumbfounded for a moment. It was only until he broke the silence and said, "Look, you don't know how happy I am to have found you, but I really, really, need to pee. So, if you don't mind–"

Those were the first words that Jungkook had spoken to you.

And in that instant, despite the slightly awkward, non-picture-perfect meeting, you were nothing less than smitten from that day forth.

Things between you and Jungkook went swimmingly after your first introductions. You two were soulmates; after all, it was only natural to get along. You had more in common with the boy than you would have guessed.

Your first couple of dates were much better than anything you had imagined them to be. Despite the cheesiness of a dinner and a movie for your first date or the loudness of your second arcade date, you were already looking forward to spending a future with Jungkook.

The first time he kissed you was like nothing else you've ever felt. Fireworks were an understatement. It was like all the stars in the universe had aligned perfectly, and all you could see were each and every constellation in Jungkook's eyes the moment he pulled away.

You were far beyond smitten at that point.

But what you didn't expect upon meeting Jungkook was how your vision would be impacted so greatly. Yes, you had heard about how wonderful a world of colour was, and yes, that was one of the things you had been looking forward to upon finding your soulmate; however, you could never have imagined just how vibrant the world really was.

You knew you were lucky to find your soulmate in your twenties. There were too many people who went countless years or even their whole lives without finding theirs, and you happened to meet yours only after a couple of decades into your life. It made you excited to spend the rest of your time by Jungkook's side. It would be a future where both of you would admire the process of the sky: shifting its palette in the evening to paint the clouds in an awe-inspiring gradient. Or seeing the luscious ruby-red strawberries adorning his favourite cake on each of his birthdays as the years passed together. Seeing the swirling brown of his irises, too, was one of your favourite sights after being able to see colour.

Your life became nothing short of a rainbow. Every day felt magical being with Jungkook; being with your soulmate.

Before you knew it, you celebrated your first year together. Then two. Then a few more until you both graduated from university. You eventually found a little apartment to call home at around the same time; it made sense to move in together. Previously, both of you had roommates during your schooling years. Although now, living together only seemed natural when you knew you'd eventually get married one day.

And living with Jungkook was nothing but natural.

Waking up next to your boyfriend was better than you could have imagined. Seeing his cute, groggy face puffy with sleep was the most endearing thing to you, and he thought the exact same way when he'd wake before you on the rare occasion.

It was like a little insight into how the rest of your life would be.

Your heart would uncontrollably flutter every time Jungkook would approach you from behind and gently wrap his arms around your torso as you worked at the stove. Or the way he'd sometimes comb your damp hair after a shower, making sure to pepper little kisses to your neck or cheek in the process. Your heart had never felt so full until Jungkook had unexpectedly made his way into your life.

And you're forever elated that he did.

•

"Which one do you think looks better on me?" Chaeyoung held up two shirts to her torso.

You examined both pieces and felt the fabric before saying, "I think I prefer the red one," referring to the shirt on the left.

You and your two best friends were spending a sunny day off just wandering around the streets downtown. It was your chance to explore the little cafes you would keep driving by or window-shopping at the cute boutiques you'd see. Chaeyoung had dragged you and Yeosang into one of the stores when a mannequin's outfit in the display case caught her eye.

"No, I think the blue one is nicer," Yeosang interjected as he pointed to the second option.

You hummed, reconsidering your answer, "Actually, yeah, you're right. I think you should get the blue one."

Chaeyoung inspected both tops once more, "Okay, blue it is."

The three of you walked to the cashier for the girl to make her purchase, leaving the store shortly after to continue on your way.

"You're both so lucky to have found your soulmates already," she beamed at the two of you as you passed by another shop.

"You'll find yours eventually, Chae," Yeosang added. "Seeing colour for the first time will blow your mind."

You only nodded in agreement and returned their smiles.

Your stomach had been feeling slightly off since this morning, but you ignored the feeling in pursuit of seeing your friends for the first time in a while. Yet now, the unsettling feeling seemed to be growing stronger.

"Hey, guys," you rubbed the back of your neck, "I'm not feeling too well all of a sudden. I think I might be coming down with something. I'm sorry to ditch you so early, but I should head home."

"Do you want a ride back?" Yeosang offered, being the only of the three of you to have a car.

"No, it's okay. The bus runs pretty frequently. I don't want to bother you."

You waved goodbye before either of them had a chance to protest and began walking to the nearest bus stop.

You weren't necessarily feeling sick; that was a lie. Or, rather, you suddenly felt like you had been struck by a tsunami. An overwhelming sensation of swirling nauseousness and anxiety began brewing beneath your skin. You clasped your hands together to prevent them from visibly shaking once you'd taken a seat on the bus.

You were uncertain of what was happening to you so suddenly.

However, you did know that that shirt looked awfully grey, not blue.

Now that you think of it, the sky above you appeared duller too.

•

"Hey, Guk, come look at this!"

Jungkook followed the sound of your voice and turned down the neighbouring aisle, only to see you holding up a folded square of checkered material.

"It's on clearance, too!" you said with excitement.

Your boyfriend stepped closer to you and took the blanket into his hands. "What is it?"

"What do you mean, 'What is it?' It's a picnic blanket, you goof," you took the square and flipped it over to see the image on the cardboard package of how it would look unfolded. "I've always thought the idea of those picnic dates is adorable. Cheesy, but adorable."

Jungkook admired your smile as you continued to read the supposed 'features' of the blanket.

"It's got a water-resistant bottom all while the top is a thick and soft flannel. It's also apparently easily foldable with a carrying strap." You continued to scan the list of details, "And look, it's machine washable! I think it's a good one." You turned your attention to the boy stood next to you, "What do you think?"

Jungkook wouldn't have been able to wipe the adoring smile off his face no matter how hard he tried.

"You're so cute," he mumbled and pulled you into a hug in the middle of the store.

"That's nice," your voice was muffled against Jungkook's chest, "but what do you think of the blanket?" You wiggled your arm free from his hold to display the picnic blanket once more, examining his face for his reaction.

Jungkook felt the fabric before saying, “It's soft. Yeah, I think it's a good one.”

“'It's soft,'” you repeated his statement. "That's all you have to say about it?"

"I can't say I'm a connoisseur of picnic blankets or anything, my love."

"Well, neither am I, but I'm sure I can think of more adjectives to describe it other than 'it's soft.'"

The boy encouraged you to come up with some.

"For starters, look how colourful it is! It's like a plaid rainbow in a fun little bundle."

Your words made Jungkook laugh, causing you to giggle too.

"Okay," you admitted, "maybe I'm no picnic blanket connoisseur either."

Jungkook admired your rosy cheeks from laughing. "Let's buy it," he said. "Going on picnics with you sounds like fun." He pulled you close once more, "Actually, anything as long as I'm with you sounds like fun."

“Does that mean you’ll sleepover tonight?”

The boy pretended like it was some philosophical question before breaking out into a smile, “Yeah, I’ll sleepover tonight.”

•

You did your best to keep that instance of a colourless sky and grey shirt to yourself for days. When Yeosang and Chaeyoung texted you later that day to check on you, you told them you felt better after having a nap.

And it was true, but not the full truth.

You blamed what you saw on a lack of sleep. It was just your tired eyes playing tricks on you; it had to have been. That previous night, you and Jungkook had gotten distracted by watching a few episodes of a show together, not realizing how late it had become.

So, when you went to lie down upon returning to your apartment that afternoon, you silently prayed that when you'd wake, you'd be able to see a complete colour spectrum once more.

It only broke your heart when that wasn't the case.

You crumpled onto the floor after staring up at the monochromatic sky extending above you; not an ounce of blue could be found between the clouds, nor all the way to the horizon.

You were dreading talking with Jungkook about it.

The day you first were able to see in colour when you met him, never did you anticipate that one day they would begin to fade.

Could you have rushed into things too quickly? Did you love him more than he loves you?

Has he fallen out of love with you?

Regardless of the possibility, seeing the colours begin to disappear couldn't have meant anything good.

That's when you'd decided to hide it from anyone, especially from the boy you loved with nothing less than your full heart and entire being.

Perhaps feigning ignorance could make the hue return. At the least, it was wishful thinking.

When Jungkook returned home that evening, you pretended like nothing was wrong. When he'd asked about your outings with your best friends, you'd said how nice it was to see them again.

You even showed him the nail polish you bought for him when the other week he said how he was interested in trying some for himself; after seeing your nails decorated so prettily.

Despite the name of the bottle's shade reading Ebony Midnight, you found yourself doubting the colour. You second-guessed if it actually was black like you intended or some confusing and ambiguous tint of navy blue.

Jungkook kissed your cheek and told you how excited he was for the upcoming weekend when you'd have the time to paint his nails for him.

Yet, a few days later—on both of your days off—when your boyfriend came up to you with the nail polish bottle in hand, you found yourself brimming with tears uncontrollably.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong, love?"

You stepped back from Jungkook's advancement towards you.

"(Y/N)?"

His eyes held nothing but concern for you, and yet you still doubted his authenticity.

"Jungkook," you whispered, "what colour is that nail polish?"

The boy examined the small glass bottle. "It's black," he said like it was an obvious fact. He looked at it closer. "Wait, no, it almost looks dark blue in certain lighting."

All of the oxygen depleted from your lungs. You clasped your hand around your mouth as you wept, your eyes clamping shut both in frustration and in fear.

You felt Jungkook's arms wrap around you, pulling you into his chest and gently rubbing your back.

"Please," his voice was small, "can you tell me what's wrong? If it's because you got blue when I asked for black, that's not a big deal, love. I'm so happy you remembered when I told you about it. And I still want to use it! I could barely tell when I looked at it–"

"I can't see blue anymore."

Jungkook halted his ministrations on your back, tensing at your words.

"And I'm afraid to know what it means," you continued, struggling to find your words. "Do you not love me anymore? Am I not really your soulmate?"

Your boyfriend pulled away slightly so he could look at your face properly; tear-stained and all. "(Y/N), please. I love you more than anything in this world. Never forget that." He brushed away a stray tear falling down your cheek.

"Then why are my colours fading? I've never heard of that happening before..." You furrowed your eyebrows in thought. Another reason suddenly popped into your head. "Unless–"

You didn't let yourself finish that sentence. Your eyes met Jungkook's only to find his expression had become more solemn.

"No," you whispered. "Please, no. Don't tell me– I-It can't be–"

Jungkook said nothing and pulled you back closer to him. You squeezed the boy so tightly, sobs shaking your body. He hugged you back as he silently began to cry.

"Could we not talk about it right now?" his voice was quiet. "We're still doing some tests to rule out what it could be, so I don't have much information for you."

You nodded your head.

The two of you stayed in each other's embrace. Jungkook swayed your bodies slightly: a gentle rocking motion to help calm you down.

"Can you still paint my nails today?"

You forced a smile on your face over the tears that had spilled and were threatening to continue. "Of course."

You took Jungkook's hand and made your way to the couch, swallowing nausea from the information with which you'd just been burdened. While it was vague, it was heavy, nonetheless.

That night, you were having difficulties falling asleep. Jungkook kept tossing and turning by your side; he'd kick and move the blanket around too.

"Hey," you whispered, finding his shoulder in the darkness. "Are you okay?"

Jungkook sighed and brought his hand on top of yours, "I'm really warm. Too warm."

You could feel the clamminess of his hand.

"And I keep feeling itchy," he added. "The blanket isn't helping—it's making me warm and itchy and–"

"Okay, okay," you soothed him before he'd become too frustrated. You sat up and removed the duvet from his body. "Do you think a cool shower would help?"

There was silence while Jungkook thought. He rubbed his tired eyes and replied, "I can try," before standing from the bed.

"Hey," you grabbed his hand before he could walk away, "I love you."

"I love you too."

You heard the smile in his voice.

"Now, get some sleep, beautiful," Jungkook leant down to place one kiss on your forehead, then one to your lips.

You listened to the sound of your boyfriend's footsteps receding from your bedroom. Shortly after, the faucet came to life, and finally, the sound of the shower curtain dragged closed.

What you didn't hear was Jungkook allowing himself to cry in the shower.

•

The weather had been stormier lately.

Jungkook was waiting to surprise you with an adorable, little picnic to celebrate your university graduation; however, the weather had other plans.

There were some days where he'd check the weather forecast multiple times to see if there would be an upcoming opportunity to see clear skies and sunshine.

But every time, he was met with that dull, grey rain symbol on his phone.

Jungkook had had enough. Screw the weather, he thought, we'll have this goddamn picnic if it's the last thing I do; indoors if we must.

You were sleeping in on the day after your last exam. It gave your boyfriend the optimal chance to set up your living room with the checkered blanket and wicker basket after running out quickly to get some flowers. The boy had an artistic eye. After pushing aside some of the remaining cardboard boxes from the move, he was proud of the final arrangement of breakfast foods and the occasional tasteful scattered petal on the blanket. He even took advantage of some of the smaller pillows from the couch to make the set-up even cozier.

Jungkook began to anticipate your reaction, growing gradually more excited. He carefully made his way to your shared bedroom to wake you from your peaceful slumber.

"(Y/N)," he cooed, brushing away some stray hairs that fell onto your face while you slept.

You hummed at the feeling of his touch, slowly adjusting to the light seeping through the curtains. Once your eyes finally opened, you were met with Jungkook's affectionate gaze at you.

"Good morning, my beautiful love," he leant down to peck you.

"Gross!" you pushed him away, jokingly. "You're not allowed to kiss me until I've brushed my teeth." You sat up with a playful grin on your face. You lifted your arms, "Carry me?"

Jungkook chuckled as he stood from the bed, "Oh, so you call me gross, but now you want me to carry you to the bathroom?"

Despite his words, the boy moved in to wrap his arms around your torso, effectively picking you up.

"No, I wasn't calling you gross," you said as he brought you to the washroom, "it was the act of kissing me with my yucky morning breath. That was gross."

Jungkook placed you down once you were in the room. His arms never left your sides.

"I don't suppose you're going to ask if I can brush your teeth for you too, are you?"

You picked up your toothbrush, wetting the bristles and adding some toothpaste, "So sassy today, Guk," and began brushing your teeth.

The boy only smiled, wrapping his arms around you once again and squeezing your smaller frame in his strong embrace.

Once you finished washing up, Jungkook told you to close your eyes as he pulled you into the living room, bursting with excitement.

"Promise me you won't make me run into the couch or a wall or box or something," you mumbled as he pulled on your free hand; your other one was covering your eyes.

Jungkook giggled but complied with your promise.

Eventually, you felt him stop in front of you, making sure you wouldn't crash into his back. Beneath your feet, you felt the cold wooden floor of your living room.

"You can open them now," he muttered into your ear along with a gentle kiss.

And when you did, you saw the beautiful arrangement of treats and flowers all sat upon the old picnic blanket, surrounded by the final few boxes you'd yet to unpack. It was the same blanket you bought before you moved in together when you claimed that you'd love to go on a picnic date with him one day.

When you made that purchase, never would you have guessed that its first use would be in your newly-shared apartment inside on a rainy day.

"What's all this for?" you felt strangely emotional at the sentiment.

"It's for you, (Y/N)," he pulled you into his arms once more. "Happy graduation. I'm so proud of you."

Jungkook leaned down to kiss you properly for the first time that morning. His thumb traced the shell of your ear as he smiled into the kiss, feeling the way one of your hands clasped the back of his shirt while your other one threaded through his hair.

"You're incredible, Jungkook," you whispered as you broke from the kiss. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," he returned the sentiment and gave you another quick kiss. He took your hand and led you onto the blanket where you sat side-by-side.

"You know," you began as he mixed around the assorted fruits he chopped up earlier, "if we had a dog like you said you wanted, all this food wouldn't have been able to be left out on the floor."

Jungkook stopped fiddling with the fruit salad as he processed your words. "I still want a dog," he said simply and continued to stir. "But you're right. It would be a lot more challenging," he fed you a strawberry, "like having a baby."

"Dogs are like big babies," you chimed-in with a smile.

The two of you continued to snack while sat on the blanket. Small conversations and giggles were all that could be heard within the walls of your apartment. The atmosphere was significantly brighter than the downpour that continued outside.

"Do you think we'll see a rainbow today?" Jungkook asked as you both were now leaning against the base of the couch.

You were still clad in your pyjamas and him in his leisurewear.

"Maybe, if this rain ever stops," you replied. "Maybe if the sun shows itself."

"Maybe."

Jungkook brought the back of your hand to his lips, then laced his fingers between yours while the two of you continued to watch the rain.

•

"Do you have any nail polish remover?"

You heard Jungkook's footsteps approaching you in your bedroom, looking up to see his figure appearing in the doorway.

"Are you tired of how it looks already?" you smiled gently at him.

The boy shook his head. "Actually, I'm not allowed to have painted nails for tomorrow when I go to the hospital."

Your smile faded. "Oh, right. T-that's right. Um..." you got off the bed and trekked to the bathroom with Jungkook in tow. You opened the cabinet beneath the sink to find the little bottle. "Here you go. I have some cotton balls too to use with it. Do you need help with this too?"

"No, I should be able to do it myself."

"Okay," your hand found its way onto Jungkook's back, your thumb rubbed his shoulder. "Make sure you do it in a well-ventilated area."

"Thank you," he smiled.

Yet, you could tell his expression was only fleeting.

You were afraid. No, you were petrified of what tomorrow would bring.

Jungkook had been going through more testing lately, although you were still in the dark from it all. He kept giving you the same statements: "We're still figuring out what it could be," or "We're still not sure yet."

They were all just different versions of "I don't want to tell you because I don't want to worry you."

You still worried regardless.

You and Jungkook stood by the front door where you hugged him before he left for his recurrent hospital visit.

"Maybe you could paint my nails again when I come home tonight," he suggested, inhaling the scent of your shampoo for his memory as he held you in his embrace.

"Maybe," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady.

Before you knew it, Jungkook was once again out the door.

It was only when you were alone that you'd let yourself cry. You knew you needed to stay strong for his sake. Being on the receiving end of a life-threatening disease was hard enough; you didn't want to make his experience any more challenging. Although, you still didn't know for sure if that's what it was.

Jungkook exited his car once he arrived at the familiar tall building. He stepped into the elevator and pressed the familiar button, and eventually turned left down the familiar hallway to the waiting room.

He was shortly after ushered into his doctor's office, taking a seat in the squeaky and uncomfortable and all-too-familiar grey chair.

His doctor soon after entered the room.

"How are you feeling today, Jungkook?" she greeted him with a gentle voice, taking a seat in front of her desk in the corner of the room.

"My headaches are becoming more frequent," he began. "I also haven't had much of an appetite either, and sometimes, it's difficult to breathe," he stated with furrowed eyebrows. "I've overall felt more tired lately. That might be the biggest thing—my lack of energy."

Dr. Kim hummed and jotted down some notes. "Have you told your soulmate anything yet?"

Jungkook shook his head, "No, I try not to. I don't want to stress her."

The doctor sat upright once again, finishing her writings. "You may want to reconsider that choice," she cleared her throat. "Your cells haven't been responding to the antibiotics as we'd like them to. Perhaps, if we had caught it sooner–"

"But we didn't." Jungkook's voice was firm. "We didn't, and this is my life now. We try, and we fail, and we repeat the cycle over and over." He took a deep breath. "As soon as you told me the diagnosis, I suspected I wouldn't make it for much longer. I suspected that I wouldn't get to live the future that I've dreamt of." His features softened as you entered his mind. "The future that I've wished for." Jungkook paused, then considered, "Can I spend my final days—however long I have—with my soulmate?"

Dr. Kim's eyes remained on Jungkook's. "Are you certain? Because there's another procedure we could try. It would require you to stay here in the hospital, and there would be risks associated with it due to the stage you're in, but it's the last one we can offer you."

"I'm sure." The boy didn't hesitate. "I'm positive. I just want to be with her," he felt himself tearing up. "She already knows that something is wrong. I don't want to tell her that my MRI is practically all made up of black-voids." Jungkook bitterly wiped away the tear that fell, "She's losing her colours. She knows I'm dying."

"So you'd like to spend the rest of your time at home with her?" Dr. Kim clarified.

"More than anything."

•

"Surprise!"

Jungkook's hands lifted from your eyes.

"What's all of this?" you asked with a smile.

"For you, silly."

You giggled, looking between the array of treats displayed on the picnic blanket and your beautiful boyfriend. "I kind of figured that, Guk. But why?"

"Do I need a reason to treat you, my love?" Jungkook pulled you close to him, "I felt bad about the last time when we were stuck inside from the rain. I wanted to try again, properly, this time."

"But do you see all of this?" You gestured to the container next to you, "We couldn't finish everything you prepared last time, but you still got a cake for today! Do you expect the two of us to eat an entire cake along with everything else you've packed?"

The boy chuckled, "Come on, (Y/N), it's not that big of a cake. I'm sure we can finish it all no problem." He popped open the plastic container, eager to taste it. "And if not, then we'll have some to eat for tomorrow."

His logic was reasonable, you considered.

Jungkook picked up a fork and dug it into the side of the strawberry cake, only to bring the utensil up to your lips to give you the first bite.

"How is it?" your boyfriend asked, trying to gauge your expression as you chewed.

"Absolutely delicious," was your muffled response.

Jungkook reached up to wipe off the speck of whipped cream from the corner of your mouth before feeding himself a forkful.

"It is delicious!" he said with delight as the strawberry flavour danced across his tastebuds. "I may not know how to make a cake, but I sure know how to pick a good one."

"Ah, yes, picking good cakes is a valuable life skill to have," you playfully teased, admiring the way Jungkook continued to inhale more of the dessert.

The two of you laid back on the blanket after working your way through some of the treats (and about half of the cake; it was more than you anticipated you two would be able to finish in one sitting). Your head was resting on Jungkook's chest while he played with the ends of your hair as the two of you admired the heavens.

The sky was immaculately blue with picture-perfect white fluffy clouds decorating it. Jungkook was getting nervous when he woke up to rain that morning, knowing he had all of the preparations ready for the picnic. But now, the post-rain summer afternoon left a comfortable temperature with the sun high in the sky, warming the grass and gradually working its way to kiss the horizon.

"Hey, (Y/N)?"

You glanced upwards from your position on Jungkook's upper body.

His eyes remained fixated on the sky as he asked softly, "Would you like to get married?"

The grin on your face was immediate at hearing his question. "Without a doubt, yes."

Jungkook beamed back at you and hugged you tightly, kissing the top of your head.

"This isn't a proposal because I don't have the ring yet," he muttered into your hair, "but you already make me the happiest man alive. I can only imagine how incredible our future will be, (Y/N)." You felt him squeeze you slightly tighter. "There's nothing more that I want than to grow old with you by my side."

You felt yourself getting emotional at his words. "When the time comes that you do propose, know that it's already a yes." You propped yourself up so you could move to meet Jungkook's mouth with your own, caressing the side of his face while his hand continued to fiddle with your hair.

Jungkook grinned into the kiss. In all the years he's spent kissing you, the act never failed to pull butterflies from his chest.

You eventually pulled away only to see the light pink dusting across your boyfriend's cheeks with matching rosy lips. You could spend all day admiring him, and he, likewise, could do the same with watching you.

You once again nuzzled into his side with an arm around his torso, returning your gaze to the sky. It was beginning to shift into a radiant, golden-colour the lower the sun fell; the clouds reflected the light, displaying a gentle wash of coral-pink.

You're forever grateful for all of the dazzling colours which Jungkook brought into your life.

Goosebumps tingled throughout your body at the way the boy so gently grazed his fingers along your arm. The outside air was growing chillier with the depleting sunlight, yet being pressed against Jungkook supplied you with enough warmth to stay comfortable.

"Hey, look over there," your boyfriend indicated to your left. "Do you see that?"

You lifted your gaze to above where he was pointing.

•

There was a rainbow in the sky on the day that Jungkook died.

You received the dreadful phone call from the hospital early that afternoon. You thought he'd only stepped out for his usual testing. You had been admiring the way the sun finally broke through the dense rain clouds as you were waiting for his return home.

However, minutes before your phone rang, your whole world drained of colour. It was the difference between one blink. One split-second; one moment. You could see the golden sunbeams as they danced down to the concrete below, and then, suddenly, you couldn't. Everything became a varying shade of the asphalt; every hue vanished in that instant.

It was only a few weeks after you painted his nails for the first and last time. Of course, there was no way you'd have known it was the last time then.

Your heart tore into two at thinking how much pain Jungkook must have experienced near the end. He never once complained to you about any of it; he never told you what was wrong. You only found out afterwards from his doctor over the phone.

You nearly missed the sight of the rainbow after you set your phone down: the arc extended above the city in its monochromatic glory in the equally colourless sky.

You could recall the different hues that would make up the once pretty sight.

"You should make a wish, (Y/N)!"

"Make a wish on a rainbow?"

"You've never heard of that before?"

You pulled your eyes from the sight in the sky to your boyfriend's face, "No, never."

"Then today shall be your first."

"Hm, well, alright, Guk."

You sat up on the picnic blanket and clasped your hands together, pressing your eyes shut as you reiterated your wish in your head. Upon opening your eyes once you finished, you were blessed with Jungkook's delicate features gazing at you.

You brushed away some of his hair that fell into his eyes.

"What did you wish for, my love?" Jungkook whispered, leaning into your touch.

You exchanged his glance, admiring his beautiful brown eyes smiling at you, and inched closer so you could kiss him.

But now, you kind of hated rainbows.

"I wished to spend a lifetime with you."

They reminded you of your wishes that would, now, never come true.

"I wished for the exact same thing."

••