#but this is maybe one of the most cringe things I’ve ever written

[simplepotatofarmer]

Ngl I used to be very offended by DNB, but seeing that you ship it I was like, well, if Loyal (#1 and most respectful Techno fan I’ve ever seen, someone I look up to and respect) ships it, then it must not be that big a deal.

And I mean, I lowkey ship c!FWT, so I might as well not be a hypocrite.

i get you!

i think the mcyt sphere has a very... odd relationship with boundaries and creators. because the the creators are more accessible so you can ask these questions but no one every really stops to be like 'hey maybe we shouldn't shove this stuff in their faces'. that also means things get taken out of context (like cc!techno talking about shipping being cringe re: people shipping him, the real person, with one of his mods) and people use this as an excuse to attack others.

like, i came from fandom where you could ship anything and the only real line was like, asking misha collins about destiel and i really do think we should bring back the whole 'stop asking people questions and just use common sense and treat them like people instead of fandom validation machines'.

it's actually a kind of scary thing so like. i don't blame anyone for being like 'no wait'. and it also makes sense to have ships that you just don't really like and don't want to see! i have a couple of those and then i'm just apathetic about the rest.

but yeah. the way i look at it is, i'm not harming anyone. these are fictional characters and both the actors behind them were pretty clear on these being written characters and i really think this fandom would be better served by having a bit of a stronger line between the two!

also like. cc!techno was way more vocal about not liking c!sbi family dynamic so. y'know.

anyway, sorry for rambling. i really do get your point, anon. <3 <3

[femme-enby]

Do not attack me, but I have a fanfic update-

So, after waking up after a shift & having another one tonight, I realized a few things…

1) I really miss my seasonal haunt job

2) I really miss spooky season

3) since I’ve never before in my life written a fanfic, or any type of writing that included conversation aside from quotes in essays, I might be better off writing possibly the most self-indulgent BS ever as practice (NOT instead of!!!)

Plus it would give any feral readers some advice, as much like myself, some of y’all are probably decent at analyzing other’s writing. Even if you’re not tho or don’t think you are, when I finally (probably within the week) start posting chapters, I welcome all advice! Just… please, remember I’ve NEVER done this before, so it’s probably gonna be a little bit all over the place and kinda rough.

Sooo…

I’ve kinda already started…?

Summary- you want a seasonal job, (subject to change, considering Fazbear DID try to make a whole haunt attraction with no indication that THAT was seasonal… or maybe I will simply ignore the fact that time is a thing that passes. Who knows.) so after moving you apply at the local haunt. Shenanigans, shitty customers, some animatronics are there, notably two jesters. What could go wrong? (Probably not much, this is for me to indulge & my indulgences are very relaxed)

Similar to the last offering- we will be wooing the jesters, some friends to lovers perchance (we completely ignore the general advice to never date a fellow haunt actor, which exists bc at heart even if not in reality almost all haunt actors are theater kids and that leads to drama) aaaand idk.

I just wanna be a haunt actor rn instead of my typical job, and I DESPERATELY need practice before I dive into a more proper, structured fanfic.

This is gonna be cringe. It’s gonna be goofy. It’s gonna be wordy bc I need practice on… NOT, being INCREDIBLY over explanatory. It’s not that I think my readers are dumb, it’s that I got that tism in me and I over analyze and over explain EVERYTHING.

But!!! If you’ve ever been curious about how being a haunt actor works, what it’s like, etc. then you’ll know how it works (at least from my experience) intimately well.

That being said…

I’ll be doing some research on other haunts for more location ideas, bc while Sun & Moon are pretty easy (EVERYWHERE has clowns. Can’t have a haunt without clowns) the others might give me some trouble… but I also REALLY want to include them, not just bc they’re awesome but also bc it would be good practice for my other fanfic, so I can get a general idea on how I want to write them…

I know my haunt had a more “country” attraction, and Monty’s backstory seemed to portray him as more of a rural gator… but idk. Maybe the difference from his attraction vs his true/current personality is workable tho.

My haunt also had a… food focused, of sorts… attraction, where ofc it would be easy to put Chica…

But WTF do I do with Roxy? Or Freddy???

That will be a problem for another day.

[determunition]

Hi so I’ve curious, (Been nervous about starting my own AU) When you first started posting OFH (on twitter/ao3) how did you get the courage to post it? Were you ever afraid of getting called ‘cringe’ or ‘weird’ or anything else negative? If so how were you able to get over it? (Btw I do love this AU with all my heart!) Sorry if any of these questions are too sensitive!

hi!! thanks for the questions, i'm flattered to be considered a source of wisdom about this x3

OFH/retyrement, like most fandom things i do, started as kind of a silly shitpost thing; i love human AUs, and when my buddy squid_hug made that original text post about the retirement home it tickled me too much to ignore. objectively the scrybes being human old people bickering in a retirement home is a goofy, silly idea, and that's how it started as an AU, down to the written fic. i think that in itself made it a bit easier to post about

however! even with that, when i started posting the first pieces of art it was definitely a "do it scared" situation lmao; i don't remember where i heard this, but in some cases it takes even more courage to do something new when you're already known for something than it does to start something new with no presence at all, and that was definitely true with the retyrement AU. it was my first contribution to the fandom too! i was definitely worried it wouldn't go over well with anyone bc it was so damn niche lolol

my main piece of advice for getting over this fear (besides just doing it scared until you're not scared anymore) is to get yourself a hype squad lmao; though maybe the more accurate term would be a mutual AU ecosystem. i had squid to develop a lot of the AU with me at the start and we bounced a lot of silly ideas off of each other, and now i have a lot more folks around to crack jokes and hype each other up about our art and fics! also at the beginning i had a point where i was feeling a little self-conscious about continuing to post (the AU had a painfully small amount of engagement at the beginning lol), but as soon as i got one (1) ask saying "i wanna see more of this" i took that as my green light to get as silly with it as possible lmao

so ig my TL;DR advice is: don't take shit too seriously, remember it's all in good fun, and surround yourself with folks who enjoy funny lil AUs as much as you do! the second thing can be hard, as it involves uh, putting yourself out there in the first place, but embracing that discomfort is a necessary evil for having a good-ass time! if you can successfully kill the part of yourself that cringes then you'll never be cringe again

godspeed on your own AU endeavors, the digital world is always better for having another crazy creative alternate universe in it <3

[mlmxreader]

Doubt | Eddie Brock/Venom x gn!reader

 Anonymous asked: Hi hon 👋🏼 (does that sound cringe?? Like I said, I'm trying to mix up these greetings 😂).  I hope this ask finds you well!

May I please ask for a work using the following prompts for 🥹 my favorite loser Eddie Brock X non-binary, male, or gn!Reader:

"I came as soon as I heard the news"+"For what it's worth, I'm proud of you"

Maybe Eddie is going deep dive within his own thoughts (self doubt, etc.) and just can't seem to centre himself. Feels like he's majorly messed something up and reader is there to comfort and reassure him.

(As always, this is just spit balling, all creative liberties to you of course!!)

Thank you 🖤!

🐍anon

summary: Eddie is doing, well, shit and he needs a little bit of TLC - but luckily, Venom knows just the person.

tws: swearing

support your fanfic writers by reblogging what you read & enjoy

Eddie stared at his laptop, the time ticking by so slowly; he felt like everything that he had written was just complete shit. Like he was as bad at being a journalist as he was a superhero.

He felt like he wasn’t good enough, that the skills and time and energy he had put into everything was for nothing; it was all shit, it was all terrible. Venom was right, he was a loser and he would always be a loser; he swallowed thickly as he stared at his keyboard, scratching at the back of his neck before he sighed and frowned.

He couldn’t think of a damn thing, practically torturing himself as he got up to go get a cigarette and something to drink; he didn’t even see it when Venom reached for his phone and sent a text to their significant other. Venom knew Eddie the same way you did, and just as you would have known that Eddie needed help and a distraction, so did Venom.

Eddie didn’t even know, until the front door opened. 

“Eddie. We have a guest.”

“Yeah, I know,” Eddie huffed, rolling his eyes. “But everyone knows I’m working.”

He frowned, making his way to the door, but he stopped in his tracks, and sighed heavily with relief when he saw you there; you looked concerned, but he shook his head. 

“Baby, I’m sorry, but I’m working.”

You sat him down on the sofa with a shake of your head, and already his heart was pounding and he didn’t know what he was doing in the slightest as he chewed at the inside of his lip and started to worry. “Eddie, I came as soon as I heard the news - Venom texted me, and asked me to come over. He said you were struggling, doubting yourself.”

Eddie shrugged as he shook his head again, hands shaking as he gently pushed you away and tried his best to smile. “I’m, I’m fine - it’s just that everything I write is the same old churned out shit, and it’s never gonna be good enough. It’s not. I’m not fucking good enough, baby, and that’s… that’s okay! I just won’t ever get a decent job, I won’t ever fucking be able to afford more than this shit flat and-”

“Breathe,” you told him gently, patting his thigh gently as you raised your brows. “C’mon, Eddie, focus on me.”

He nodded shakily, swallowing thickly as he dared to get a little closer. 

“Do as they say,” Venom told him. “You need it.”

“Oh fuck off, you overgrown worm,” Eddie mumbled, shaking his head. He brought his gaze to you and smiled weakly. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright,” you told him gently. “You wanna tell me what’s going on?”

He ran a hand through his hair, shrugging as he looked at you with despair in his eyes. “Just feel like everything I do is fucking shit right now. My boss wants this article in by eight o’clock this morning, but… look at the time, baby, I’m not gonna get it done with how it’s turning out now.”

You gave him a moment to add anything further, and when he didn’t, you cleared your throat, and sat on his lap, pinning him to the sofa, your hands digging into the cushions either side of his head as he grabbed at your hips. “Now, you listen to me, Brock, and you listen fucking good - you are one of, if not the, most talented journalist I know. I’ve read shit from award winners that wasn’t even half as good as yours. So fucking listen when I tell you that you’re great. You’re great, Eddie.”

He nodded, a little too distracted at having you on his lap but it was doing the trick, and he could feel himself slowly start to let go of his worries and about whether or not he might have fucked up his job altogether. He grabbed your hips a little tighter, blunt fingernails digging into your skin through the thin fabric you were wearing.

“Thank you…”

“Keep listening,” you demanded, commanding most of his attention. “You are a great boyfriend, to me and to Venom. You are talented, you have great skills and any publication should be grateful to have you. You’re a hero, Eddie, to so many. You’re doing your best, and y’know what?”

“What?”

“For what it’s worth, I’m proud of you,” you whispered in his ear. “I am really, really fucking proud of you, Eddie.” 

Eddie had to admit, and he couldn’t have denied it anyway, but he was starting to feel a lot better about the whole situation, he needed the comfort and the reassurance, if he was honest. It worked wonders to know that his favourite human in the world was there for him, that you were proud of him and that you recognised his skills and his talents; not many people did, in fact, he couldn’t remember the last person who did.

But you did, and to him, that meant everything. To know that one of his significant others was standing behind him and cheering him on; to know that you were proud of him, not ashamed, not embarrassed.

You were proud.

It made his heart skip a beat as he moved his hands down, grabbing the backs of your thighs and pulling you up so that you had to look down to meet his gaze.

“Come to bed with me,” you told him. “Let’s get some rest, yeah?”

Eddie nodded eagerly, using Venom’s strength to pick you up and take you to the bedroom; he let you fall onto the bed before he crashed down next to you, his head hitting the pillow as he hummed and yawned.

You would have reached over and kissed him like you usually did, but when you took a look back at him, you couldn’t help but to smile; he was sound asleep already. 

“Thank you,” Venom grumbled, crawling out of his arm and staying still beside you. “He needed that.”

“I know he did,” you said softly, kissing Venom’s forehead gently. “Thank you for letting me know, V.” 

[chris-continues]

I think we need to take a moment to collectively think about just how rewarding it would be -- (obviously after quite a long time of getting to know each other, building trust, etc.) -- to be able to take care of Nai a little bit. Making sure HE gets to have a sense of support and importance too, and knowing him well enough to be able to give it to him with whatever touches or gestures he's best equipped to recognize and let himself accept at that time.

NOTES: it’s been awhile since I’ve written college au knives, so I definitely had some fun with this hehe >:)

TAGS: @vashfantasy @h4venpha @lune010 @millionsvash @beanibon

Oh most definitely. In my college au he’s constantly watching over Vash and is always swamped with work- having to quit extracurriculars and take up jobs in hs to support them both, helping to take care of the crummy apartment, making sure Vash was taking care of himself, it takes a toll on how you take care of yourself.

I like to imagine Nai and Vash as a sort of example to Katniss and Prim if you read THG- Katniss only takes care of herself because she needs to take care of Prim. I think Nai is kinda like that too. Not that he himself needs a lot of maintenance or upkeep lmao (considering he doesn’t need to eat or sleep) but he still has to groom himself, take care of everything regarding house payments, bills, etc.

By the time reader meets him he’s hardened by his experiences, as you’d expect. He’s very touch averse, yet starved for it (relatable), and the idea of others caring for him makes him cringe. It feels.. shaming to him. Like it invalidates the care he’s had to meticulously handle for years. Of course, it doesn’t; but that’s just how he processes it. Supporting him will start with acts of service.

“You’re always getting me snacks, and I saw this yogurt at the campus cafe and thought of you. You like blueberries, right?”

At that point in time, he’ll hesitantly take it and eat it while studying later. It’s… not half bad. Actually pretty good. Hm. He’s oftentimes carrying food on hand for Vash and you, (who he’s grown partly fond of because you make valid points and you aren’t incompetent), so having the favor returned isn’t something he ever truly put his mind to.

Or perhaps offering him a pen, something small like that. Saving a seat for him in class. Offering him music. He doesn’t accept some of these offers, in fact a lot of times he refuses, but it’s the thought that counts and he does learn to appreciate it more over time.

The first time your hands brush, he curls away with a disgruntled look on his face. Don’t take it personally, it’s just that he isn’t entirely comfortable with physical touch. Imo the only exception to this is if you’re overstimulated and need some time away or if you’re having a panic attack- in which case, for anyone Nai is doing what he can to help. It’s a rough spot he’s seen himself in, a rough spot he’s seen Vash in, and despite finding a lot of things disgustingly human he won’t shame anyone for such a thing.

If you don’t want touch during those times? Understandable. He’s the same way. But if you’re reaching out or need to grab something (ex: his sleeve, fiddle with his pen, etc) he’ll silently hand it to you.

Giving him that same support is a whole other story though, as usually he’ll push everyone away coldly. Even Vash. Leave him alone and when he’s ready, he’ll come to you.

“Hey, you ok? I was worried about you earlier.”

“Adequate.” He hummed.

He won’t apologize for pushing you away, because duh, he was in a stressful situation and him pushing you away was valid, but there’s a sense of.. maybe some closeness between you two. I think growing closer to Nai and caring for him is something that will take time, and it’s gradual, you never really know when it starts- but you’re someone he learns to.. gravitate towards, and Vice versa.

When you get really close to him, you’ll lean on one another. You have to initiate, but he’ll melt into the touch. It’s perfect because he can pull away if need be, it’s an easy thing to do without having to awkwardly position yourselves, and it’s cozy. Or linking arms while sitting down, your head against his shoulder. He finds the weight to not be too suffocating and it fuels his touch starved self just a bit. It’s comfortable. You have to ask often, and he appreciates it.

“Can I lean on you again?”

“Mm.” (Yes)

Frame it as a favor to him. Initiate. He doesn’t wanna ask for it himself. Once he grows more comfortable he’ll allow himself to accept your affections more, craving your touch. It’s something that is a very long term struggle, but he’s handling it well.

This could apply to being in a QPR, close friendship, or a romantic relationship w him imo!!

[noxxytocin]

20 Questions for Fic Writers Tag ✍️

Thank you for the tag @myokk 🫰✨ This looks fun!

How many works do you have on AO3? 4 public and 1 anon!

What's your total AO3 word count? 18,969 words (public)

What fandoms do you write for? For now, I'm focused on Hogwarts Legacy. But I do have some pretty intense ships in other shows, like Stranger Things, so I might dip my quill into those at some point.

Top five fics by kudos? My most popular fic by kudos is Bury. It’s quite amusing because I knocked it out in one night after a few drinks and some seriously intense feelings. It’s my least polished piece, which just goes to show that AO3 readers are all about those spicy, quick reads and I love that, haha.

Do you respond to comments? Absolutely! Every comment notification makes my heart a bit brighter, so I reply to them with as much warmth as I put into my fics.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I don't think any of my stories end on an angsty note—I'm more of a fluff enthusiast.

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Perhaps, Insomnium.

Do you get hate on fics? I don't believe I receive enough attention for that to be a concern. However, I do review all comments before they are posted for this very reason, so that I may block any unwanted individuals, if necessary.

Do you write smut? Yes, but in a very delicate, poetic manner. Smut, to me, possesses a certain elegance.

Craziest crossover? None.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge, though I do believe I have inspired some writings. I don’t particularly mind if I encounter similar works after mine has been published. Writing is meant to be an inspiring endeavor, and that is precisely the purpose of inspiration.

Have you ever had a fic translated? I have a close, French mutual who helps me double-check my French in my fanfics, and I know a decent amount.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Well, my husband provides me with a great many ideas for the fics I’ve written, so I would certainly count his contributions. He is an excellent beta reader!

All time favorite ship? I couldn't possibly choose that...I have so many ships. I don't believe I have a favorite; they all occupy equal space in my mind.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? None, I am confident that I will finish all of mine in time. I've just been busy!

What are your writing strengths? Transforming risqué themes into romantic fluff is my specialty. I can take a rather smutty idea and turn it into tooth-rotting fluff. It’s more of a curse than a strength, really, haha...I also enjoy crafting dialogue and capturing the canonical personalities of characters. When writing Sebinis, I make a point of watching extensive videos of their lines to accurately capture their mannerisms and language.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language? It’s fine as long as it is executed properly. A minor mistake is forgivable, but it genuinely irritates me when I encounter French in other fics that is clearly incorrect, especially when the writer or beta says that French is their first language, yet this is not evident in their sentences. My French beta mutual has even remarked, “Yeah, no, they're lying” It drives me mad, as I am certain this beta is deceiving the poor author, and yet I cannot address it myself. It is not my place, and I am well aware that it would only result in the individual defensively justifying their lies. Hopefully they will find out eventually...

First fandom you wrote in? First ever?....hmm....I am honestly not sure...maybe (cringe) homestuck??? But that was in 2011 or 2012, hahaha...

Favorite fic you've written? One that I am currently doing for Sebinis...but I can't share because it's for an anon writing fest!

Surprise - no 20th question! 🫴✨ Tagging: @luminousecho @the-invisibility-bloke @shyinsunlight @steve-black-hl @moltenwrites @the-golden-comet @the-letterbox-archives @mirdeli @esolean @gaunts-angel @jamiemoonymark @crime-in-progress

[badlucksav]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you @nyamadermont for the tag!

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 199. I don’t know what the 200th will be yet 😅

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 1,836,320. That’s a whole lot of characters kissing.

3. What fandoms do you write for? My most common ones are Avatar: The Last Airbender and Avatar: Legend of Korra, but I’ve also written fics for The 100, Six of Crows, Law & Order: SVU, Spiderman (Tom Holland), Harry Potter, MCU, The Last of Us, Soul Eater, Spy x Family, Stranger Things, and Twilight.

Honestly though I haven’t been writing much fanfic. I’ve shifted what focus I have for writing to poetry and original fiction.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. The Proposal — a Zutara AU based on the 2009 Sandra Bullock & Ryan Reynolds movie of the same name.

2. An Unlikely Alliance — a Zutara season 2 divergence fic where they find themselves traveling together

3. Your Number 1 Fan — a NSFW Zutara AU where Katara is a cam girl and Zuko is a subscriber

4. Perks of Being Your Neighbor — a Zutara modern AU with fluffy good “neighbors” tropes as well as big brother Zuko to an orphaned Kiyi.

5. Play with Fire — yet another Zutara modern AU. This time, they’re in college. Slowburn, tons of pining.

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! Comments are a writer’s lifeblood. The only time I usually don’t is if the comment is rude or demanding of an update.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

That would hands down be The Conduit, if only because I left it on one hell of a cliffhanger and then never wrote the sequel.

My bad yo

Second angstiest (sort of?) would be The Ghost of You (iykyk)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I like happy endings, so I feel like most of my fics have one. I’d say, for the level of pining and enemies-to-lovers aspect, The Proposal probably takes that cake.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Can’t get hate if you write rare pairs or rarely post

But yes, I used to. It actually drove me away from posting on ffn, and also drove me away from the Zutara fandom for a long time (and even still, I’ve never really come back).

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Oh yes, oh yes I have. And I write everything from soft vanilla first time sex to dirty kinky hot sex. Fully depends on my mood.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I don’t write them much, but the crackiest one was definitely the drabble I wrote throwing Rocket from Guardians of the Galaxy, Joel from The Last of Us, and Kaz Brekker from Six of Crows into an elevator together.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I think I’ve had a few requests for permission to translate, but I’m not sure if anything was ever actually translated.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I co-wrote with @idklolwot!

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Oofers, what a loaded question. All time favorite? Like I have to pick one?? Impossible.

It’s a tie between Irosami and Zutara.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oof, at this point like all of them 💀 at least as fanfic. I’m considering taking some and turning them into original fiction.

16. What are your writing strengths?

People seem to like the character interactions I write as well as how i describe settings and the character’s inner monologues.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I definitely find the climax/conclusion to be the hardest. Maybe that’s why I never finish fics.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

If I spoke other languages fluently, I think I’d give it a try. But I don’t, so I won’t.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

First fandom I wrote and posted for was Avatar: The Last Airbender. But I recently unlocked memories of writing super cringe Twilight fanfic in middle school that never saw the light of day.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

This answer changes often. There are so many fics I love for different reasons (The Conduit is some of my most creative work, The Fire and the Flood is some of my best writing, The Proposal is actually finished…) but as of right now, it’s The Fire and the Flood. Maybe because I’m rereading it and falling in love with it again.

Tagging some of my favorite writer folks. If you’ve already been tagged, feel free to ignore 🤣

@orangepanic @neva-borne @mycomfortblanket @krastbannert @authorjoydragon

[bbangsuns]

i need somebody | e.l

requested? yes, by anon

pairing: ethan landry x reader (race/ethnicity not specified)

warnings: ghostface doesn't exist, ethan calls reader pretty girl but that's the only allusions to gender, slight angst, mentions of weed, ethan and reader being a little mean to each other (just to protect themselves from heartbreak again), alcohol consumption, sad reader, sad ethan, idiots who are still in love

a/n: this might be the longest thing i’ve written? i had to break up the text kinda weird since some of it was too long so im sorry about that. also i listened to i need somebody by day6 while writing this

word count: 3.655

when your relationship with ethan started 3 years ago, it was truly one of the best days of your life. he was the sweetest, most attentive person you'd ever met, always making sure you were satisfied and happy with him. it was constantly you two against the world, always having each others' backs and being at each other's side the moment either of you called. unfortunately for you, nothing good ever lasts in this world, not even the relationship you thought unbreakable.

for the last few months, it seems as though ethan wants nothing to do with you, constantly making excuses as to why he can’t be with you or why he has to leave early. every time he runs out on you, you feel your heart breaking more and more, not sure how much longer you’d be able to tolerate his sketchy and distant behavior. as it turns out, you wouldn’t have to deal with it much longer, because a party that weekend is what would ultimately be the last straw.

the day had honestly started out normally, chad texting you earlier in the day asking if you wanted to go to a frat party that was being thrown for halloween. he was shocked at how quickly you agreed, but he was excited to see you nonetheless. the idea of free alcohol and loud music attracted you, deciding you’d use it as a distraction from ethan and your relationship which was slowly but surely falling apart. looking at the time, you saw you had about 7 hours before the party actually started so you decided on taking a nap for a while to pass the time, already having an idea of what you wanted to dress up as.

you woke up a couple hours later, realizing you’d slept longer than you had originally intended. you got out of bed and went to the bathroom, deciding a quick shower would be in your best interest. what was supposed to take 10 minutes ended up taking about 40 minutes, having gotten lost in your thoughts about ethan and where you guys would end up. you got out of the shower and got dressed in the clothes you had picked out for the costume and dried your hair, getting started on the makeup right after. you desperately hoped this party would really serve as the perfect distraction.

— 2 hours later — you completed the finishing touches of your costume, looking at yourself in the mirror. you smiled at yourself, satisfied with the way everything turned out. you looked at the time, cursing when you realized you were an hour late. you rushed out of your apartment, quickly locking the door behind you and making your way down the stairs. luckily the place where the party was being hosted was only about a 10 minute walk from your place, so you weren’t worried about having to take the subway so late at night. arriving to the party, you make a beeline for the alcohol, grabbing a red solo cup and filling it with whatever concoction they created. taking a large drink, you cringed at the taste of cheap liquor but you paid it no mind, quickly finishing the drink and filling up the cup again. as you went to refill your cup, you heard someone call you over so you quickly poured the mixture in your cup and headed over.

"hey smiley! we're over here!" you heard chad yell over the music, waving his hands wildly with ethan at his side looking embarrassed and, maybe even nervous or pissed off? you couldn't tell, and honestly you didn't want to know what he was thinking. nonetheless you walked over to where they were, rolling your eyes at the nickname chad gave you but a smile was on your lips no matter how badly you wanted it to go away.

"there they are! i thought you bailed on me last minute!" chad was now talking in your ear directly so you could hear him clearly. you leaned into his ear also, your voice raised slightly.

"there's NO WAY i would've passed up on free booze and weed, man!" you told him, smacking him on the chest with a laugh, taking a sip of the drink in your cup. chad simply laughed at you, nodding his head knowing you were right. before he could say anything else, tara walked in and caught his attention, causing the boy to quickly excuse himself before going after her. you shook your head and turned your attention to your boyfriend, catching him already staring at you. you felt your face get warm as his eyes trailed down your body, taking you in. you gave him a lopsided smile, hesitating a little before you ultimately decided to move closer to him. the tension in his body seemed to melt away almost immediately, his arms wrapping around your waist and yours around his neck, careful not to spill the contents in your cup.

"hey there, pretty girl" ethan whispered in your ear, placing a kiss on your neck, goosebumps rising on your skin at the feeling. you leaned your head on his shoulder, taking a moment to just breathe him in, happy that things seemed okay.

"hi pretty boy" you chimed back, a laugh escaping your mouth as you saw the visible red tinge on his cheeks even in the shitty lighting. he just shook his head and kissed your cheek, taking another moment to look at your costume.

"you look like, really good babe" he commented, feeling your confidence shoot up a bit. right as you went to say something back about how good he looked in his knight costume, you felt a tap on your shoulder. you turned around, confused as to who the hell was interrupting your rare moments of peace with ethan. you were faced with some blond boy who was obviously wasted, but he still had a smirk on his face that made your skin crawl.

"hey baby, ditch this loser and come dance with me. i'll make it worth your while" he spoke in a disgustingly flirty tone that made you want to vomit. you tried your best to keep the grimace off your face and forced a tight-lipped smile to your face, shaking your head and giving him an answer that would hopefully satisfy him and make him leave.

"i'll come dance with you later i promise" you replied tensely, hoping he'd get the hint and leave you alone. in his drunken stupor, he didn't seem to sense the frustration lacing your voice and nodded, the smirk on his face ever present. he walked away, rambling about how he's gonna get lucky that night. turning back around, you didn't expect to see the look of anger that ethan was currently wearing and it scared you if you were being honest.

"eth, what's wrong? why are you looking at me like that?" you asked, your stomach sinking when he all but shoved your hands off of him. “You’re seriously gonna ask me that right now?” he scoffed at you, shaking his head and shoving past you. It took a moment for you to follow behind him, standing there in disbelief at how quickly his mood turned sour. When you reached him, you grabbed his arm and forced him outside, not wanting to argue in front of a bunch of strangers. He tugged his arm out of your grip, acting as though your touch was burning him.

“What the fuck is going on, ethan? Why are you treating me like that?” you exclaimed, trying not to raise your voice too much in order to avoid onlookers. Ethan just looked away, his jaw clenched so hard you were afraid his teeth would crack. you pushed that thought to the back of your mind, though, because you needed answers, so you walked right in front of him, crossing your arms over your chest.

“well? are you gonna tell me what i did to deserve this type of treatment?” although you tried to sound to sound strong, the desperation was evident in your voice, wanting to know how you could fix things.

he stayed silent for a moment before speaking up, his voice distant and cold, “i’m not in the mood, so maybe you should just go hang out with one of the many guys you’ve allowed to flirt with you.” for the second time that night you were left speechless, not understanding why he’d say something so absurd.

“baby, what the hell are you talking about? you’re the only one i want to spend my time with!” you were moments away from crying out of frustration, wishing he’d just be straightforward about what’s bothering him.

“are you sure about that? because you seem pretty fucking happy when someone offers up their number or offers to take you out." he practically scolded you; all you could do was stare at him, bewildered at the fact he thinks you could somehow be happy with anyone that isn't him.

"ethan, i have no idea what the hell you're talking about. why would i be happy with some freak?" you retorted, waving your hands around. he simply let out a humorless laugh, crossing his arms across his chest. then he spoke the words you never in a million years thought he'd tell you.

"you know what, y/n? i don't care anymore. we're done." as soon as those words left his mouth, he shoved past you roughly, leaving the party without telling anyone. you on the other hand, you were frozen in place with tears clouding your vision, not wanting to believe he had ended things so easily, as if ripping your heart out of your chest and stomping on it was no big deal. you were so deep in your head that you didn't even know anika and mindy were next to you, jumping when you felt a hand on your shoulder.

"hey bub, what happened?" anika asked you, concern lacing her voice as she took in your shaking figure and bloodshot eyes. you shook your head, not wanting to say the words, knowing your heart would break all over again at the realization of what had transpired minutes prior, but they eventually came out.

"he broke up with me" your voice was wobbly, the pain evident to the two girls in front of you; anika was shocked, she never thought ethan would be the type to leave you heartbroken in the middle of a party. mindy, however, was pissed at the tall boy; what the hell was his problem? why would he break up with someone as caring, sweet, and kind as you? whatever his excuses are, she was already planning on giving him a piece of her mind and hopefully beat some sense into him.

"oh honey, i'm so sorry. do you want to go home? we can get the rest of the group together to watch a movie or something if you'd like to?" anika murmured, rubbing a hand up and down your back in an attempt to soothe you. all you could do was let out a shaky breath and nod your head, not trusting your voice quite yet. mindy squeezed your hand, mumbling to anika about going to collect everyone else, letting her girlfriend console you since she was better at it. she guided you back inside to the front door, telling mindy that they were going to wait on the sidewalk instead to get away from everyone else.

about ten minutes later she walked out with everyone tailing behind her, chad immediately heading towards you to wrap you in his arms, placing a kiss to your forehead. tears immediately sprang to your eyes but you forced them back, not wanting to cry on the side of the street; instead, you wrapped your own arms around his waist, feeling grateful that you had chad and everyone else as your best friends. after a minute of just standing there with him, you forced yourself to stand tall and put up a facade, no matter how much it hurt. you unwrapped yourself from chad but still stuck close to him and anika, needing their presence to feel grounded as you spoke to the group.

"thank you, and i'm sorry for ruining the fun. if you want, you guys can go back inside and enjoy the party while i head home" you insisted, feeling the guilt creep in at the fact that they were going to miss out on a party just because you were upset. what you didn't expect, though, was mindy to scoff in disbelief and look at you as if you were crazy.

"there's no way we're going to leave you alone right now! you're clearly hurting and are in desperate need of some group lovin', so be quiet and accept that you're not going to win this argument" she rambled with a small smile on her face, her hands moving wildly at her sides as your friends nodded. you couldn't help but let out a laugh at seeing her behavior, her smile growing at the fact that she was able to cheer you up, even by a bit.

acknowledging defeat, you decided to just go with it, "okay fine! i won't argue with you, especially because it'd be pointless knowing how relentless you can be." this caused tara and chad to let out a cheer, glad that you were deciding to not shut them out. you smiled and shook your head, forever thankful that you wouldn't be going through this alone.

--1 month later--

despite having an amazing support system, the last month had consisted of some of your lowest moments. every morning when you woke up, you'd expect to find ethan laying next to you, his curly hair sticking out in every direction, but the hole in your heart only grew as you felt cold bed sheets each time. you hadn't spoken to him since that night, but the pain and sadness was slowly turning to anger; anger because of how he acted childishly and only considered how he felt, not taking into consideration how his actions would affect you.

unbeknownst to you though, was that ethan was equally as miserable and angry as you were, but the anger was directed at himself once he realized just how badly he had fucked up, which chad never failed to remind him of.

"what the hell were you thinking man? how could you just break her heart like that? and with some bullshit excuse too." he told the taller boy one day, still upset at the fact that his roommate and friend had been so cruel to the one person that didn't deserve it. at his question, ethan just let out a deep sigh, rubbing his hands over his face in frustration.

"fuck, i don't know. i was just feeling insecure at the fact that they'd always be smiling whenever someone was flirting with them and i got into my own head, deciding that distancing myself and basically breaking their heart was the right way to go about it" he lamented, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip hard enough to draw blood but he paid it no mind, too occupied in trying find a way to make it up to you, if you still wanted anything to do with him that is. seeing the doleful expression on his friend's face, chad felt a tug at his heart as he recalled that exact same look on your own face just a few hours earlier while he was hanging out with you.

"look man, i promised them i wouldn't say anything but it doesn't matter; they're really fuckin' pissed at you for what you did to them, but they're also just as miserable as you are even though they try to hide it. i know that if you got off your ass, went over there, and gave them a real explanation and showed you're willing to fight to get them back, they'd forgive you. they're still stupidly in love with you after all" at his words, ethan's heart sped up, a wave of anxiety fluttering in his stomach--you were still in love with him? but would you actually take him back? at this point, ethan didn't care, he just wanted to make things right with you. jumping up, he ran to his room and threw on a hoodie and some shoes, rushing out of the dorm before chad could say anything else.

taking the subway to get to your apartment across town, ethan was painfully aware of his clammy palms, rubbing them on his pants with a grimace. time seemed to speed by because before he knew it, he was already standing in front of your door, having been on auto-pilot throughout the short trip. right as he was going to knock on your door you opened it, clad in one of his shirts and shorts; the sight had him reeling, realizing that chad may have been right. unfortunately, he didn't have a chance to speak before you went to slam the door in his face, leaving him speechless with a pain in his chest, but he didn't come all this way just to give up. he knocked on your door this time, speaking through it in hopes that you would open up again.

"baby please, i just want to talk and apologize for what i did. you deserve a real explanation, not some bullshit" he begged, ready to fall to his knees if that's what it took. luckily for him, you had opened the door once again, a small smile ready to grace his features but upon seeing the blank expression on your face, it fell just as quickly as it came.

glaring at him, you pulled the door open all the way and stepped to the side, your voice as cold as his was that halloween night,

"hurry up. you have 10 minutes to explain yourself and then you leave." it was more of a command than anything else, and your icy tone terrified ethan because he had never heard you speak that way, but instead of commenting on it he just rushed inside before you decided to change your mind. he sat on your couch, his whole body tense but happy nonetheless at the fact that you were willing to hear him out, albeit begrudgingly. ethan rubbed his sweaty hands up and down his thighs once more before he took a deep breath and began his explanation.

"that night…that night is one of the biggest mistakes i have ever made in my life. i had one too many drinks that chad made me drink, and it brought all my insecurities to the surface. seeing you smile at that guy that night after he so obviously flirted with you just made me feel so angry, and i know it seems like a terrible excuse and you're probably right, but the drinks mixed with the thoughts already in my mind, i took it out on you and hurt you on purpose and it wasn't fair to you at all. i knew i fucked up the moment i walked out of the house, but i figured you'd want nothing to do with me afterwards so i never made the effort to reach out. this last month, though, has been one of the worst months of my life. i've missed you so much and i realized that i can't do this without you by my side."

by the end of his rambling, ethan was completely out of breath and his eyes were burning from the tears that had begun gathering in his eyes but he didn't care, he needed you to know what had been on his chest for months. you simply stared at him, your eyes glossy with unshed tears of your own and you sniffled, feeling the resentment towards him slowly melt away. you kept your guard up though, not wanting to put your heart out there just yet, scared that it would be broken all over again. noticing your hesitation, ethan stood up and walked in front of you, slowly grabbing your hands and intertwining your fingers. you looked up at him, removing your hands from his and throwing your arms around his neck, tugging him as close as possible to your body. he let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and placed his own arms around your waist, hugging you tightly. the tears finally fell from your eyes and this time you didn't try to stop them, not caring if his sweater got dirty, not that he minded either.

“i wish you would’ve told me how you were feeling instead of icing me out, eth. i could’ve helped you or done something to make you feel better, you know.” you muttered into his neck, not wanting to move from your spot in his arms, and he just nodded his head softly, his hair tickling your ears.

"i'm so sorry, sweetheart. i love you more than anything and i'm going to do anything i can to prove it, i'm never letting you go again" he mumbled into your neck, unsure if you heard him or understood him for that matter. he knew you heard him when you tightened your grip, placing a small kiss to his neck before pulling back and placing your lips on his, relishing the feeling of them on you for the first time in weeks. ethan moved his lips against your own slowly, moving one hand up to cup your jaw, keeping your face as close as he could. you pulled away after a minute, giving him the first genuine smile you've had in a while. ethan felt his heart speeding up at the sight of your pretty little smile being directed towards him for the first time in nearly two months.

"i love you too, e. also just know i am gonna hold you to that promise" you teased lightly, already feeling your heart being mended at having your boy in your arms once again; you'd have to thank chad for smacking some sense into the both of you.

[lastlight-inn]

Writing Interview Tag Game!

Thanks for the tag @pouroverpaloma!

When did you start writing?

I’ve always been a highly creative person, visual art my usual and longest-standing vice, but writing I’ve always been interested in. At 15 years old I tried to write a book (didn’t finish it). I forget what the word count was but it was a high fantasy Percy Jackson-esque. I tried working on the worldbuilding for a book in college and afterwards but nothing concretely got…written. Not plot just worldbuilding lmao. That project has since turned into my D&D homebrew world that I have yet to subject to any players. 

I’ve done some short creative writing here and there, a spoken word-style poem a few years ago and I took part in Escapril 2020. Otherwise, I have not been writing creatively in quite some time. I majored in engineering in college so there weren’t a lot of opportunities for me to stretch those creative muscles. The writing I’ve done for my GalexTav fics are my first big dive into writing since high school. 

I would journal as a therapeutic device but I’m only ever to keep up with it when I’m in crisis as it’s very effective at emptying my brain but it’s not necessarily good writing, it’s often train of thought and very emotional.

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

I read mainly fantasy and I write fantasy so there isn’t a lot of difference there. Maybe when I start branching out with my writing I’ll have an actual answer but for now, no!

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

I haven’t had anyone compare my work but there’s lots of little things I see in the fic authors I read that I certainly feel strongly about but have yet to attempt to emulate. I want to be funny like goldenhearts (@yourworsttotebag). I want to go to poetry land like i88 (ao3). I wish I could figure out how to write 10K plus chapters every chapter like @linnetagain. I see so many little things in everything that I read that makes me want to try and be better.

I’m also still trying to figure out my own style. It’s been so long since I’ve tried to write anything longform that I am still exploring what my voice even sounds like. Even the first few chapters for you’re at the top of my lungs I wrote just a few months ago I cringe at when I read now. I’m in a high growth stage at the moment and I feel like I haven’t really settled into anything yet. But I’m in the midst of it and maybe if any of you who’ve read my fics notice anything please tell me lol I would appreciate the insight.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

I have a few lmao. So I’m currently at work (if you’re my bosses, this is a joke I’m not at work rn) where I have two screens and as of today a fancy new click clack keyboard. Job-provided desk chair that’s okay and surrounded by work-related things. 

My office at home is much cozier. I have a blanket on my lap and around my shoulders, at least two drinks within arm’s reach (usually a water and an Olipop) and a fresh bag of Nutella biscuits waiting to be devoured. I also have a click clack keyboard there and I’ll put on my big gaming headphones to blast music as I write. 

I don’t like writing on my phone. If I do, it’s to quickly get down a rough idea while it’s still in my head but I can't do it for a long period of time as typing longform on my phone like that stresses me out. (Those who write entire fics in their notes app, I salute you.)

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

Reading other fics! Anything that gets me thinking of new ways to put the pookies into new situations. Great example is @yourworsttotebag (goldenhearts on AO3) just started posting a Parallel Universe fic where the Gales from two different universes get swapped. It got me thinking of how that would work with Gale and my Tav, and how that would go if my Tav was the one who got swapped. I’m not going to write this fic, but it’s fun to think about! It gets me thinking outside of my usual settings and it helps me think of situations and conversations that might end up applying to what I’m actually writing. 

I'm also constantly listening to music and while I'm horrible at being able to hear lyrics and therefore have a hard time linking song meaning to a scene or plot point, the flow and energy of a song can give me ideas just by themselves.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

I don’t think I’ve written enough variety to have developed anything. I actually went back and skimmed through my writing, posted or otherwise, with this lens to try and identify anything but other than the usual stuff you’d expect out of a Galefic I’ve got nothing.

What is your reason for writing?

Brain got too full of my Tav and Gale and I needed to drain it lmao. Now it’s just a constant flood. I’m also just enjoying it! I mention earlier that I’m usually a visual artist but the art block and imposter syndrome has been very bad. Writing fic has been freeing and has allowed me to create freely without judgment. (Or, well, the minimum amount of judgment required to even post something lmao).

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

Any, really. But especially if a commenter calls something out in a chapter they particularly enjoyed or related to that really gets me going. I’ll scream at any comment someone leaves even if it’s a “chapter kudos” or whatever. Seeing Hit # going up is gratifying in that I know that people are here and reading it but a comment really solidifies that a real person is here and enjoying it. Never be too scared to leave a comment. If I feel anything in any fic I read I try to comment because I know how much it makes my day as an author so I try to be that person for authors as well. 

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

I hope they’re enjoying what I’m reading! I hope that the readers that are subscribed to me and my fics get just as excited when they see an AO3 email about one of my fics come through like it does when my faves update. That’s the dream.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I like my action and combat scenes, but I rarely write them. I have posted one I think and I have one in a WIP that won’t be posted until the whole thing’s done. But that unposted WIP chapter and then Chapter 4 of you’re at the top of my lungs are some of my favorite things I’ve written.

A lot of these questions have made me realize how little feedback I get as a writer and maybe I need to find a writing group or something. 

How do you feel about your own writing?

I honestly feel like it’s awkward and stilted. I find I have to try hard to make it all flow. I think that’s the years of having to write engineering reports coming through, being straight and to the point and all that. I usually feel like my writing is good and I am able to get across whatever point I’m trying to make but I would love to be more flowery and go to poetry land more often. I want to get across big feelings and big ideas and have it feel visceral and not like I’m just throwing words on a page.

Tagging @waterdeep-weavemoss, @dr-demi-bee, and @crimson-and-lavender

[pitconfirm]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

thank you for tagging @mars-mystic!! mwah 😽

1. How many works do you have on ao3

eight, two of which are anon teehee (but i think one is very obviously mine 😅)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 

60,694... soon to be over 70k 🙈

3. What fandoms do you write for?

im just here for lance nation..... writing about my pookie wookie

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

excluding my anon fics which are the actual #1 and #3...

1 - Gatito (the people yearn for kitty lance)

2 - Midas Touch

3 - Broken Glass (guys please someone else write more 141831 im begging....... i cannot be the only threesome in this tag)

4 - Venus Flytrap

5 - Kamikaze

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I love responding to comments.... i love every comment I respond to every comment unless it's just emojis or i have literally no idea how to respond 😭

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I guess Kamikaze is my only fic with a kind of angsty ending... but not really. i don't like angsty endings 😭 i need problems to be solved. if i know a fic has an angsty ending i generally will not even touch it

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

im now realising that most of my fics on ao3 are just straight up porn..... i swear i am planning more substantial things in the future. but i guess my two tumblr drabbles have happy endings?? oh wait or Detonate.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

luckily i've never gotten any hate at all..... not even anon hate asks, i feel like im missing out. this is what I get for being kind and amazing 😔🫶

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

do i even need to answer this. every kind. almost.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

not crossovers but there are like.... specific aus living in my mind that i want to write. hunger games au, dbh au.... beloveds.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i hope not 🤨

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

🙅‍♂️

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no....... not yet 🤔

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

tbh I’ve read so many different fandoms and ships over the years but strollonso is the one I’ve been most feral about. or maybe arthur/eames from inception…..

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I literally have zero wips right now except venus flytrap. the ideas in my brain have dried up like the sahara desert to work on this thing. once I’m finished we’ll see

16. What are your writing strengths?

I like to think I have good wit and flow. and maybe attention to detail… always thinking what more I can add to a scene to make it more palpable

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I think just…. really terrible self criticism. a lot of the time I’m writing and I’m like… what if this sucks what if everyone hates this what if blah blah blah….. WHO CARES!!!!!! I wish I could be less worried about that

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I will write a few words if I feel confident enough about them but not whole passages. I always have nando saying little bits in spanish

19. First fandom you wrote for?

TOOOO EMBARRASSING. I only ever wrote for one other fandom and I was 13 on wattpad and shudder every time I remember

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

I guess it has to be venus flytrap for the pure amount of effort I’ve put in…. and because it’s definitely the most well written by farrrr. I cringe a little reading my other stuff now 😭 but I guess that’s just the nature of improving over time

NO idea who’s already done this so forgive me if I’m being a goof @lil-shiro @lou-who-writes @parallelplayers @boxboxbrioche @vicsy @userkritaaay and now my brain is firing blanks so sorry if I forgot any of my beautiful writer friends

[lunacornfan2k24]

I’ve seen other fanfic writers do an AO3 wrap up and tbh I’ve been kind of embarrassed to do one myself because I was only a productive writer from May to October which isn’t even half of the year (thanks to Jedi: survivor, bg3, and everything in my authors notes) but it was also my most productive year for writing fanfic that I wanted to do something so…

Ao3 statistics don’t easily separate by year for a multi chapter fic that I started back in 2021, but I can do a rough estimate of 2023 stats and then reflect on every fic that I’ve written this year. (Edit: by the time I finish writing this we will be a week into 2024 at least)

Almyrah’s AO3 2023 Year In Review:

New fics posted: The Spy and The Actor, Phoenix the Vampire Hunter

Fics updated: The Spy and The Liar: The Movie (6x)

Word count: ~50k

Comment threads: 48

Kudos: 81+

Best comment: @agent-calivide (in Exes and Ohs, chapter 7 of The Spy and The Liar: The Movie)

I have had so much support for my writing this year thanks to the amazing I Expect You To Die fandom and the IEYTD fandom discord in particular. To be honest, you guys really make it hard to be humble with how much love is showered over my fics and I am so grateful for every kudos, comment, and bookmark I’ve received since I started the Celebrity Crush series way back in 2021 when a certain actor lived in my head rent free.

Like I said before the statistics are rough estimates and I think that the best way to celebrate all I’ve done this past year is with words more than numbers and statistics.

The Spy and The Liar: The Movie

This is probably the best fic I’ve ever written! I am so proud of how it has grown beyond ten bullet points to be the 66k story it currently is with more to come. I’ve loved weaving foreshadowing and subtext into the story that I think most people have missed.

It’s also really hard to stay humble as this is the most love I’ve ever gotten on a fic and it has somehow seemingly become the Agent Phoenix/John Juniper fic on ao3. I’ve literally dropped all my other wips for other and bigger fandoms because of how much love and support it’s gotten. Especially because of the people in the fandom discord. Maybe it’s the instant appreciation but I had never been more motivated to write than when y’all shared your love for this fic and the Celebrity Crush series in general.

The Celebrity Crush series and ieytd was the first thing that got me back into writing after going through the most traumatic and violent loss and experience of my entire life back in 2020 (wasn’t even covid related lol). Literally an entire year had passed before I could write again. To know that this story has meant as much to you guys as he has to me has been the greatest gift that could ever been given to me.

Thank you.

The Spy and The Actor

This story wasn’t really supposed to be anything. The first (and only) chapter was written on a whim in one sitting based on a conversation in the fandom discord. Just the third time I’d be rewriting the ieytd 2 with an Agent Phoenix/John Juniper twist…

But then came the comments.

For those that don’t know, the point of the fic was that it was written and published by John Juniper but to come off as a fan thirsting for John instead of John thirsting for Phoenix. At its core it was me roleplaying as John Juniper. And the discord decided to roleplay in the comments as various characters from the games and of course I had to respond in character as John Juniper!

Even when I was a teen I thought roleplay was kinda cringe. But now? I get it, like I get it! I had so much fun roleplaying as John Juniper!!! I’m usually really nice so being able to just let go and be an absolute bitch. I’m so excited to work on the next chapter but I know it’ll have to be when I’ll have time to sit down and roleplay with everyone again.

Phoenix the Vampire Hunter

This was written for Calivide for beta reading a chapter in The Spy and The Liar: The Movie. This is the first fully alternate universe fic I’ve ever written and I absolutely adore the world I’ve created. It’s a sandbox that I’d love to play in more and I’d love for others to play in the sandbox too if they ever feel like it and write their own stories of the world. The ending I have planned leaves the world open for so many possible stories for myself or anyone to explore.

And I promise that I wrote vampire!Juniper before I ever played Baldur’s Gate III and fell in love with Astarion

God this got long but these fics mean so much more to me than simple statistics can tell and I hope people can see why I chose to elaborate on everything.

With 2024 signaling the 10th year of me writing and publishing fanfiction and with last year being so productive, I’m hoping to bring all of last years productivity into the new year as long as the video game industry stops releasing so many good games (I haven’t even gotten to spider-man 2 yet lol)

[silverview]

anyway, the bonnie episode of human capital is so BEYOND beyond. jonathan is such a perfect character who's completely made in the performance. he talks like he's in a permanent state of just having recovered from running up a flight of stairs. like he's always just a little bit out of breath. the effort involved in being the way that he is, and presumably in being as physically large as he sounds (i've never heard anyone sound so big), the fact that he presumably doesn't get much nourishment besides sugar and caffeine and alcohol – he's always struggling just a little bit. he's so hot i'm sorry.

and just. the way all the miners are. the way true blues are in general, the way david is around them, the fact that he's one of them. thinking about: in the jess episode, when he’s accused of being an orange, the tone of his voice when he responds – "actually, i..." despite EVERYTHING in that moment he somehow STILL manages to be a little bit smug, even at his MOST vulnerable and degraded and cringing he is STILL. a TINY BIT SMUG. about being a true blue. un FUCKING believable.

and thinking about: all the different hidden sides of david we get to see throughout human capital – high society snob (bonnie), culture nerd (hayley), slut (chip). the genuine darkness that comes out, more than ever before, in the bonnie episode.* like. david getting to surface these forgotten/repressed aspect of himself, and revealing them to the audience, while he’s cycling through all these different gigs – he’s recovering things he lost in prison, and rediscovering paths he never got to go down before. he's both remembering who he is and grappling with who he’s going to be, going forward. truly, in s1 we only got to see a very flattened, distorted version of him, with only occasional hints of the complexity that’s still in there – potential to be all these things, including a villain, and who knows what else. he has the capacity, a natural inclination even, for cruelty and egotism. maybe it won’t ever fully surface but it’s in there, and he’s aware of it.

*the fact that it’s lawrence on the receiving end of both his villain moments in that ep – smashing the glass, and the thing with the vat – refer back to my other post about how young david was partly messed up from being sexually harassed by the miners. not least lawrence, lbr. rip lawrence. you will always be remembered for calling people darling, telling us david’s canonical eye colour, and doing terrorism.🥤❤️

last thing – in the hayley ep – hayley echoes lines from the sharespace flashback in a way that’s clearly intentional (drunk and suggestible / dying to know what’s going on in that head of yours). in fact the flashback is echoing hayley, because it was written/released months later. but from david’s point of view, hayley is echoing that conversation he had with colin years ago. christ do you ever think about how triggering it must be for him to have hayley hitting on him. god. i mean i’ve written fic about that before but still. god.

[thief-of-eggs]

fic writer meme

Thank you thank you to the timkon QUEEN @hearteyeshayley for tagging me <33

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

67

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

322,925

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I mostly write for DC, but I also write for Marvel, as well as TBOSAS, ATLA, and any other book/show that randomly grabs my interest

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Mark Me Like a Bloodstain (Most unfortunately, because i hate to think that this is my AO3 legacy. Smut for Miguel O’hara that I wrote in an hour…)

Thoughts of You Consume (More smut! I didn’t expect this one to gain so much traction, but it is super fun to write!)

The Hardest Thing to Lose is You (…more Miguel O’hara smut..)

Like Melting Snow (Aaaand more snowjanus smut) ((This one is especially awkward seeing as I promised to never write Omegaverse, and yet here we are))

Guilt and Greed (One that I am actually proud of!!!! Not my greatest work but I did enjoy making this one.)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try my hardest to!! I’m a bit behind right now, but I also haven’t been on my AO3 much this last month. I reread every comment at least 5 times, they genuinely are the food that gets me through it all. I love love LOVE talking to others about my works, and so getting to talk to yall in the comment section is SO fun for me!!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably Memory’s Embrace. While it is not my angstiest work by far, I usually throw some comfort in there as well to let it not end angsty. This fic, however, is the only one that truly ends without a happy ending.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I think So If You Will, Please Fall in Love With Me may be my happiest ending. I absolutely adore this fic, I love fluff but don’t write it nearly as much as I’d like to.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yup! The Snowjanus fandom, while ever so kind and supportive, also shockingly is full of haters as well! I’ve received everything from death threats to blatant slams of my writing. They make me giggle every time

9. Do you write smut?

I told myself I wouldn’t, and yet… here we are.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you have written?

No, I’m boring :(

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Twice actually! (To my knowledge)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes!!!! I had one turned into a podfic (literally made me CRY, I was so so happy)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No but I’ve talked about doing so with a few writer friends!! I am so down to

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

This is a very tricky question for me. I tend to love things with my entire being when I hyperfixate on them, and then I tend to feel very ‘meh’ about them after. So picking an all time is difficult, since my interests are always fluctuating.

HOWEVER, I would say that Timkon and Drarry are the two that have remained constant. (And while I am new to Andreil, I can already see it becoming another core ship for me)

15. What is a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have an entire half-written Timkon Reverse Robins AU where Tim is red hood, and Kon ends up an accomplice. @sophiasrant has heard way too much about this AU.

As much as I would love to expand upon it and actually finish writing it, I don’t think I’ll ever have the time to do it justice. It would end up as SUCH a long fic (though I do have full written scenes if anyone is ever interested)

16. What are your writing strengths?

I like how I describe emotions and feelings. I am not very good at articulating how I am feeling, but give me a character and suddenly I have a million shades of color to paint the particular emotion they are feeling. I love to be poetic in writing, and I think I sometimes achieve that.

I also think I have a talent with smut, though I am not sure. The feedback would say so, but I literally do not know how to judge smut writing. It always feels cringe, but maybe all smut feels that way.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I never plan ahead. Like, ever. I lack discipline and I never do enough editing. As soon as a work is finished it gets posted. There are quite a few works that I know I could have done better, if only I weren’t so impatient. But alas, I cannot make myself wait.

18. Thoughts of writing dialogue in another language in fics?

I’ve only ever done it once, in a fic with Bucky Barnes and Natasha. I feel neutral on the topic. Just do research if you plan on doing it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Downton abbey! I wrote it for me and for me only, and then decided to share it. I still never got around to finishing it…

20. Favorite fic you have written?

I have quite a few!!! (Because it’s so hard for me to pick favorites)

All of my favorites are non smut fics. I love the ones where I managed to be particularly poetic, or especially fluffy. Like, the words just flowed, and I was quite happy with the outcomes.

Those include:

So If You Will, Please Fall in Love With Me

Born From Ash

Rough on The Surface (But You Cut Through Like a Knife)

That Which Lies Beneath

I'm tagging @nanachachasposts <33 As well as anyone else who would love to do it!!

[wrongcaitlyn]

OKAY SO OW.

will got a little too real in this chapter 😍

THE ANGST THE ANGST AND THE WILL AND APOLLO FLUFF AND NICO BEING ANGRY/WORRIED AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

literally such a good chapter no i didn’t cry haha what are you speaking of????

so besides all of the sadness i have a very strange question but i overthink everything 😭 so sorry abt that, but i was just wondering cause i know nico has changed lyrics in his songs vrs the ones that are the actual irl songs (haunted having the “cause in your ghost right now your house is haunted” lyric instead of the regular ones) (plz tell me i’m remembering right) and this is actually such a nieche thing to think about but my question is because so many songs use the pet name “baby” in them and nico doesn’t seem like the type to use that (do they even have any nicknames for each other in tyt?) so. would he. a somehow just avoid it. b. use a different pet name c. i need to stop overthinking things because the original lyrics don’t all adhere to his songs. d. a secret fourth thing???

hopefully that makes at least some sense!

ty for another great chapter can’t wait until next week :D

HSJSJ im so glad you liked it bc it was an absolute horror to write!! yk sometimes you’ve got those scenes that you know have to happen, and they have to be written *perfectly* and so then you just stare at the doc for hours trying to figure out how the characters work

but on to the question! oh god. this is hard. see the thing is: i think it WOULD be in character for nico to say baby. i think he also says tesoro like in canon, and definitely sunshine, and maybe darling?

the thing is. i, personally, as a person, have a visceral HATRED of the word. and of pet names/nicknames in general. i don’t mind it in music, but whenever i try and write it into the fic, i just cringe and automatically backspace (this has absolutely nothing to do with people who actually use it as a term of endearment i just don’t know how to write it in without it sounding incredibly awkward or out of character)

so honestly, though, i think that nico is chill abt using it in a song, bc i feel like music honestly uses it more as filler? like, if you need to add a persons name, you’re obviously not gonna say their name (unless the song is hey stephen) so they just add in a pet name - most commonly baby

and i don’t think nico would have anything against that - id probably have to look through the playlists to see just how many times songs use the word, but i don’t think it’s that often

anyway my answer is that yes nico uses the word, i think that will started calling him babe at some point and nico just started using baby too but it’s much more rare and likely when he’s very tired/trying to convince will to do something (such as not work)

i think he prefers using something like darling in his songs (or maybe i’ve just been listening to too much hozier but that’s neither here nor there) but he doesn’t stray away from using the word if it fits well

and he probably uses more terms of endearment in real life than i’ve included (though will def uses them more often, and nico probably refrains from using pet names in front of other ppl) but i just hate writing them so much im sorry😭😭😭😭 i CANT i swear i tried to include a babe at some point in talk your talk and a sunshine but like the only thing slightly close to that that i ever left in a final draft was neeks. i can’t write pet names unless they’re said in a sarcastic or insulting mannerHSJDJ

thank you for the ask!!

[bugeyedfreaks]

About your ppgxrrb post, as someone who’s in the shipdom for years but now only like it because of certain famous fic, I agree.

Pretty sure some of the shippers would agree with it too but a lot of them are excusing their toxic behaviors as just the boys being toddlers + doesn’t know any better since most of the fics takes place when they’re teenagers/older. I disagree with the whole “they’re kids they don’t know any better” excuse cause they’re fictional characters and they’re just born bad/evil, and its not that deep

…I ended up writing a whole lot and I’m gonna cut it just so I don’t clog up everyone’s dash with my Deep PPG/RRB Opinions. 😆

Yeah, ugh, it wouldn’t bring me down so much if what you said wasn’t such a prevalent line of thought, but if there are some shippers who would agree with what I wrote before… I don’t understand what would compel them to ship the characters in the first place! I can’t understand it! I’m not saying, “You’re a bad fan/person if you ship [XYZ]!” I know people who genuinely love the original PPG series, people who I also genuinely love and cherish and think are amazing and wonderful and yet… they ship it, to my constant confusion. For years and years. 😂 I’ve even read that one fic and… I swear, I tried, I wanted to like it, I was told it was written true to the show and I Wanted To Believe… but how can the main premise be “true to the show” when it’s already 100% antithetical to who the characters are in canon in the first place? I sadly could not enjoy it. Like I said in my post, they would never be the redeemable bad boys because they’re literally pure evil. And I get suspension of belief in fan creations, I understand that fanfic is people’s way of… I dunno, indulging their fantasies in their favorite media or whatever, and I’m not vilifying anyone for daring to commit the ~atrocious~ sin of… wanting their faves to find true love. 🤣 …but what’s the point if the characters you write just turn out to be shells of how they actually act? At that point you should just go for it and make up your own original characters. Embrace the cringe!

A while ago I got really inspired and wanted to write a PPG fanfic for the first time in a million years, and since most of the story in my head included the villains in a large way, I felt kind of forced to try to add the boys (because, speaking of things that get me down, you will never get any substantial visibility on AO3 or whatever if you don’t at least include them in the tags, no matter how creative or novel your fanfic may possibly be) so I started thinking about this whole idea of how they’d really act towards the girls all grown up. I never wrote down anything substantial because I abandoned the fic, but I came to a general conclusion that 1) Brick would be complaining that the girls weren’t following traditional gender roles (i.e. the ones made up by creeps involving sandwiches and ladies making them in the kitchen for him), 2) Butch would be foaming at the mouth to sex up any girl that moved (wham, bam, thank ya ma’am… his love of carnage and leave ‘em for dead mentality would get reflected in his mixed up hormones in the worst possible way), and 3) Boomer would be the white knight who would complain and cry and eventually flip out Bubblevicious style about why none of the girls were dating himmmmmm and whyyyyy oh my goddddd he was so niiiiice to themmmmm so because of that THE THOTS MUST PAY! 🤣 They are the examples of “toxic masculinity,” like… true toxic masculinity. They canonically thrive on the toxicity. That’s why attacks against it weaken them! It‘s never suddenly changed their bad behavior for good ever. They could be beaten again and again and, instead of accepting that maybe their worldviews are bad, maybe applying some self-introspection to their awful ways and adopt any sort of good behavior, they would always ultimately double down. In the fic world, they’re grown guys, and they should know better, but it would be against their basic canon nature to want to.

…again, I’m not trying to be a downer on anyone who indulges in it, this is just an explanation of why I really can’t gel with it and just my thought process behind why that is/how I think they’d actually act. The popular depiction of them as ultra hottie bad bois who secretly have true hearts of gold under all the blatant misogyny just feels so untrue to canon to me that suspending my disbelief whenever I see the kajillion fics and fanart out there of them successfully winning the girls’ hearts is… tough.

TL;DR:

[illwynd]

2022 writing meme

Tagged by @pandirpus​. TY!!! :D

Word count for the year: 42,051 posted, significantly more than that written but not all of them were good words so we’ll roll with the posted number. Not the worst, I suppose.

Number of stories posted to Ao3: four new fics, and added chapters to two other WIPs.

Pairings written for: Thorki

Fandoms I wrote for: Thor & Loki fandom 5eva

Most popular story: If we’re not including ongoing WIPs from previous years, then What You Are in the Dark.

Story I’m most proud of: Hmm, despite being one of those ongoing WIPs, I think LMD, since it’s not just one of the longer things I’ve written in a while but also one of the more ambitious in terms of complexity and some interesting narrative and thematic stuff going on. Now that the spookyfic is just about done I’ll be able to get back to wrapping this one up, and with any luck y’all will agree.

Funniest: Illegal. Spur-of-the-moment incest smut with Thor in lingerie, written to taunt antis. It gave me a lol at least.

Kinkiest: I’m pretty sure Thor enjoying getting railed by tentacles wins this fight.

Saddest: Hmm, probably Once Again. Canon separating Thor and Loki forever hurts me. Or if we’re including ongoing WIPs, Turned to Lead. Poor mute Loki.

Least Popular: I guess Battlefield Voices? But it is a tiny random ficlet with kid brodinsons so. *shrug*

Most Cringe-Worthy: i have never done anything cringe in my life.

Favorite Opening Line(s):

Anyone else, maybe, would have been grateful.

Favorite Closing Line(s):

Since I can’t give you the last lines of WYAITD or LMD yet, I guess these had some punch...

Thor kisses him again, and Loki’s tears are cleared enough to see his expression now, so warm.

Thor kisses him, smiles at him, and it’s all he’s ever wanted.

“Whatever it is, it can’t get you anymore.”

Top Scenes from Anywhere You Would Choose to Have Illustrated:  

omg I am so bad at thinking of things like this. i just can’t tell which scenes make the best visuals. which makes it even more awesome when someone who can think in art.jpg rather than art.txt answers that question for me, like @hechizero-emplumado did here for LMD :DDDD

Story I haven’t yet written, but intend to:

OK so I’ve at least started writing all of these but they’re not close to posting yet so that counts, right?

Skrull Thor (I am rly looking forward to this one. convoluted but fun.)

Werewolf Loki (probably next year’s spookyfic)

The one where Thor goes to Jotunheim specifically because he’s got a size kink a mile wide and wants to get boned by giants, and Jotun Loki volunteers to be his tour guide, so to speak

The one where Asgard Thor and Loki meet Jotunheim AU Thor and Loki

a bunch more idk. i have so many wips in my folders. so many.

Fic-writing goals for 2023:

i just rly want to write more again. I want to finish some of the backburner stuff and drawer fics and write some stuff I’ve been meaning to write and have new ideas and write some absolute filth and some tear-streaked angst and some silly crack. I want to get back into the swing of things.

Tagging (but no pressure): @gorgeousgalatea, @incredifishface, @pennypaperbrain, @worstloki... anyone else who feels like doing it, you can say I tagged you, too ;)