#but wanting to kill his mom is a pretty consistent bit

[creepy-onthebutt]

Everyone trying to guess who stewie is and why he wants scam dead are ignoring the true comedic potential of it just being actual stewie griffin from family guy that wants scam dead

[roryhastoomanyfandoms]

There are many interpretations of the. Miguel and Gabriella and Miguel situation ans ALL OF THEM ARE GREAT but like...have my 2 cents...just hear me out...

Miguel in canon is an asshole in a major way largely because of his abusive upbringing, getting Eldest Daughtered from a young age trying to take care of his younger brother and protect him from George's violence and Conchata's...indifference/contempt? And he starts getting better once he becomes Spiderman, or at least starts thinking more about the consequences of his actions, and what the people in his life mean to him (shit still goes bad because his comics are insane)

If dad!Miguel never became Spiderman...it's honestly pretty likely he doesn't have that bit of growth and honestly, wouldn't have been a great dad. Not abusive, but I can imagine him being kind of absent and kinda emotionally neglectful, seeing how Miguels everywhere are prone to distancing themselves. Miguel also can't keep a relationship, either by breaking up or Spiderman Branded Widowing, so Gabriella wouldn't have had a consistent mother figure.

Alright, so, Gabriella, here, is being raised by a dad with so much baggage and the belief that its better to just keep her away from it (ei, keep her away from him), no real mom/mom is always changing because of Miguel's turbulent love life, maybe her uncle (depending on. Stuff) and maybe her grandma (depending heavily on Stuff). This is a fragile environment that does love her, but ultimately the adults in her life have too much shit going on themselves to effectively tend to her and her needs, especially as she becomes a tween

But our Miguel.

Our Miguel has every reason to love her wholly and unapologetically. Because he has done some very questionable things to have this child, and he treasures every goddamn second. This is a privilege he has comprised his morals for, and he isn't taking it for granted like Gabriella's actual father.

Meanwhile, Gabriella's dad fucking vanishes one night and the guy who shows up looking close enough to fool adults, he's everything she wanted from her dad. He doesn't raise his voice, doesn't get curt. He doesn't have a new girlfriend every other month. He doesn't have this tense, confused look in his eye whenever he looks at her. The guilt is still there, but it's something else. Its not her dad not knowing how to be better. She doesn't know what it is, but has suspicions.

Her papa looks at her like he's finally figured out how to feel about her, like she's finally stopped being another responsibility or chore to tend to. This one loves her even when she needs help with homework, even when she gets in trouble at school, evening when puberty hormones make her temperamental.

Gabriella doesn't know what happened to the first one, and she never finds out. She just knows that there's something...wrong, with the man she calls Papa now, but he loves her the way she always wanted...so it's fine, right?

Miguel, for his part, sees himself teeter towards their parents. Sees himself have the thing he wants so badly, would do anything for, and skirt the line their parents crossed, their whole lives. And then, that other man with his face dies. Maybe someone else, maybe Miguel really did kill himself.

Either way.

A child gets a parent who loves them, a parent gets a child who they can love freely.

So, it's fine, right?

[bongo-clash]

Look, I love Vlad and Danny’s canonical throw-down-on-sight dynamic so much it’s amazing. However. An au where not only is this middle-aged billionaire’s sworn nemesis a fourteen year old, but the fourteen year old doesn’t even reciprocate would be. A Little Bit funny.

Like, Vlad’s got all these nefarious schemes and sure, he’s got to stop them, but he doesn’t care about Vlad at all. Vlad’s either ‘be my son’ or ‘I hate you I hate you I’ll destroy everything you care about’ with him but all Danny’s got is vague disdain and a disappointed exasperation whenever he shows up. Every episode with him in it would be cut pretty much in half because Danny just doesn’t engage with his schemes and monologuing in the same way- the majority of their interactions basically consist of Vlad trying so hard to be taken even slightly seriously and Danny either just being Kind Of Mean or vaguely threatening to snitch on him to his parents.

For example:

Vlad: -So the whole town will turn against you! You'll be alone in the world with no one to turn to! Except, perhaps, the only person who might understand. And who do you think that might be, Daniel?

Danny: That's great, man. Does my mom know that you consciously and unironically keep your hair like that?

Vlad: If you're trying to-

Danny, already pulling out the thermos: She won't hate you because you're a ghost she'll hate you because there is No excuse for going out like that in public.

-

Valerie is more important in this au because in my heart she is the Most important all of the time. The moment Danny finds out Vlad gave her the Red Huntress stuff and plans on pulling his Weird Billionaire Manipulation on her he sends her a video of Vlad monologuing (in human form) about how much he wants to kill Jack and marry Maddie and to top it all off he’s talking to a ghost about it. She still doesn’t know Danny’s Phantom or that Vlad’s Plasmius but her and Danny bond more and Vlad Refuses to go near Danny when he’s with her because they just tag-team him so naturally this means they hang out All The Time.

He eventually gets confident enough to mouth off to Red Huntress about him as Phantom as well and when they’ve built up a Solid Not-Actively-Shooting-Each-Other-Out-Of-The-Sky relationship he reveals he’s a halfa, and he allows maybe One Minute for them both to process this development before he follows it up with “Oh and this also means I get to tell you Vlad’s the Wisconsin ghost, so like. If you wanna start going at him for the fact that that outfit was a Conscious Choice with me then. You Know.”

Vlad sends an ominous text and Danny just replies with a picture of him and Valerie both doing the 😐 captioned ‘Damn bro you got the whole squad laughing’ followed by a picture of Jack and Maddie holding hands. Danny is a teenage hero who fully acts like a typical sweet teenage hero with the One Exception of Vlad, whose mental health and wellbeing he has No regard for. Vlad cries himself to sleep at night and Dany doesn’t even care.

[angelsanarchy]

Glass Houses: Jack Thurlow x Y/N Series CH 04 -> CH 05

"In my defense I thought you were commenting on my weight." "So you went with skinny 9th grade virgin?"

Tagging: @roryculkinluvr @thatsthewrongwallcraig @icarus-star @cc-luvr @madamemaximoff06 @shady-the-simp

Jack spent the entire day cleaning. Thankfully he was able to find a company that picked up all the donations and junk he had cleared out of his parents room but he didn't trust anyone to come in and clean. He never realized how much his family didn't need this much space until he had to be responsible for it.

The first time he was able to sit down and relax, it was late and he was surprised he hadn't passed out already. He lit a cigarette and sat on the window sill, letting the smoke flow out of the window as he took in the cool breeze. The sound of shuffling below caught his attention and he locked eyes with Y/n who was taking a night stroll wearing her scrubs.

"Hey Jack, how's your night going?" She asked with a smile.

"It's going about as well as expected when your days consist of gutting your childhood home." Jack mockingly held finger guns to his temple making Y/n laugh.

"Hopefully you've got friends to help you. That's a lot of house for one person to gut." Y/n took a long drag and Jack nodded.

"I'm not very social at the moment...or any moment really. I've been told I'm a particular taste." Jack thought about the last time he tried to go out with Shanda and her girlfriend. He had almost gotten into a bar fight and got two drinks thrown in his face. His personality was a bit abrasive but he couldn't it. His passive aggressive narcissism came across rude to most but to the mores sensitive crowd, he was just a prick.

"I'm pretty sure they have companies who work for assholes." Y/n teased.

"Hey I forgot to congratulate you the other day. You would never guess you had a baby." Y/n's face dropped.

"Excuse me?" She questioned.

"I've never known someone to lose the baby weight before the kids a year old. You look great." Jack didn't typically comment on a woman's appearance, especially to their face but he blamed the exhaustion of the day and him fighting sleep for his lack of self preservation. That and she was a beautiful woman.

"Coming from the guy who looks like a skinny 9th grade virgin." Jack's eyebrows went up. Y/n stood her ground. He was caught off guard by the insult but remembered how Cleo would get when someone commented on her weight when she was pregnant.

"Wow I think I may have fucked up, let me try this again. When I met your mom, she said she had just become a grandma. I assumed-" Jack watched Y/n gasp and cover her mouth.

"Fuck! You thought...I am so sorry. My brother's wife had the baby, not me." Y/n explained making Jack nod his head.

"Okay so then I didn't fuck up as much as you did. That makes me feel better, a little offended but better." Jack pulled a long drag from his cigarette and Y/n raked her hand through her hair embarrassed.

"I really am sorry. In my defense, I thought you were commenting on my weight." Y/n defended .

"So you went with skinny 9th grade virgin?" Jack laughed. No one had really called him anything other than the normal insults. Pretentious prick. Son of a bitch (which he couldn't deny). Fucking asshole. He admittedly lost more weight then he would have liked when he was in treatment. He was trying to find little things that would help get him back into better shape instead of just being skin and bones.

"I was going to go with school shooter but it's been a long day, felt too dark in today's climate." Y/n frowned but Jack took amusement in it. He actually enjoy conversing with her. She had a wit about her that made him want to hear her thoughts on random things.

"I got the same response when my parents were killed in a car crash and kept telling people how my dad was decapitated." Jack gestured to his neck and Y/n nodded.

"It's truly a shame you aren't more social in town. I think these oldies need to be shaken up a little more." Y/n and Jack were probably two of the only people under 40 in the neighborhood.

"I was going to offer my condolences but I admittedly didn't know your parents that well and I'm pretty sure a year post-death seems kind of disingenuous. Your parents seemed like decent people. I always enjoyed the sunflowers my mom would grow for your mom so she had good taste in flowers." Jack was pleasantly surprised that Y/n hadn't tried to console him or offer some fake sympathy for people she clearly didn't know well. She had become a breath of fresh air in this small town full of people acting as though they knew him personally.

"I appreciate your genuine solace." Jack finished his cigarette and considered lighting another but instead just took a deep breath.

"I'm sure the last year of your life has been a real dumpster fire taking over this monstrosity but I guess we're just those kind of children." Y/n pulled something from her pocket and put it to her lips, lighting it and taking a pull.

"Yeah I didn't think I would end up...taking a year off but I guess I needed the mental break from LA anyway. Trying to get this place in order is the current goal so if you're looking for someone else's shit, let me know." Jack caught a whiff of the smoke and his eyebrow cocked. She was clearly wearing scrubs but she was absolutely smoking a joint, which wasn't uncommon for Colorado but possibly taboo among the medical community.

"I feel your pain. When I first moved back I did at least 4 garage sales just to clear out some of my parents bullshit. How can old people have so much shit? Baby boomers completely missed the whole recycling trend." Jack hadn't considered doing a yard sale but his lack of social skills would probably just have him boxing it all up to donate anyway.

"Moving back into this house alone is slowly turning me into a minimalist. I don't know if their generation just thought they were going breed like rabbits or if they were just competing to see who would have the biggest house." Jack felt comfortable having such open conversation with her. He felt like he could actually keep a conversation without someone trying to offer sympathies or checking to see if he was on the verge of another psychotic break.

"It's tough being so young in a retirement community." Y/n joked with a smile. They shared a smile for a brief moment before Jack realized he was staring.

"I guess I will rephrase my previous statement, congratulations on becoming an aunt. That kid is going to have exemplary insults by the time they hit the school yard." Jack smirked earning a smile from Y/n.

"Thank you. I'll be sure to send him your way when he's old enough to start wearing trench coats." Y/n winked like she could go tit for tat with Jack and actually enjoy it. She had a feeling they had a similar sense of humor.

"I should get back. Ace waits by the door if no one takes him to bed." Y/n gestured towards the house and Jack sighed.

"Rub it in." Jack teased, fanning jealousy but truthfully he wouldn't mind that kind of comfort this evening.

"He misses you. It's weird, all he can talk about is the strange habits of the mysterious neighbor. Soon enough, he'll tell me all your secrets so hopefully you've never murdered anyone." Y/n wouldn't realize how that joke hit but Jack chuckled darkly.

"Just my dog." Y/n took it as a joke but Jack was grateful they shared a twisted sense of humor.

"Noted. Have a good night Jack." She gave him one last genuine smile and he gave her a wave.

"Good night." Jack watched her walk all the way to her house, walk up the porch and turn the outside light off. He felt a strange comfort knowing that she was so close by and didn't seem turned off by his dry wit and dark humor. He wouldn't call her a friend but she's a neighbor he doesn't mind having encounters with.

[myechoecho]

Perfect Marriage Revenge, ep 4

We got some interesting bits of information this episode.

Firstly, Do Guk's mom is on Yi Joo's side - or at least very close to being so. We saw it a bit last episode when she realized that Do Guk was actually sleeping deeply and peacfully with Yi Joo at his side. But the look and gesture that Yi Joo's mother unconsciously mad when Do Ra showed up did not escape Do Guk's mother's eyes. Nor did the fact that Yi Joo's mom looks down on them and Yi Joo. Yi Joo handling herself with grace under that fire also solidified it. Yes, she has the ultimatum for her acceptance but I think it might not matter. Ultimately, she loves her son. Also, Do Ra will be on their side as well.

Yi Joo scared the shit our of her mom when she brought out that painting. So much that her mom immediately pulled her aside to ask about it. Yi Joo is not going down for forging paintings. My guess is the money to refund came from Yi Joo's grandfather.

The other interesting bit is that Yoo Ra's is also not her father's bio daughter. Her mother brought her to the marriage.

Se Hyeok is in way over his head with Do Guk. See him TRY to go for Do Guk. One thing does remain consistent with Se Hyeok - it's always how much Yi Joo likes him. Never what he feels for her. The absolute fury on Do Guk's face when Se Hyeok tries to tell him that they are only on a break, that Yi Joo has always liked him and that she's just using him. I love that Do Guk says he doesn't care if he's being used because he loves her THAT MUCH. And it's true. Yes, he wants to make the marriage real but if he can't he will help her get her revenge and freedom from these wretched people around her, protecting her in the process.

I love their little phone conversation and how shy Yi Joo is in answering. I also love that Do Guk tells her again that he is by her side - she does not have to do it all by herself. No one has ever told her these things. And he's also proving it by his actions.

Se Hyeok pathetically tries with Yi Joo, only having to resort to telling Yi Joo that Do Guk tried to kill his brother by throwing him off a boat. Which you know, does give Yi Joo pause but I don't think she fully believes it. Still, she is never ever going back to Se Hyeok and she pushes him away. Also, funny that they try that as a reason for Yi Joo not to marry Do Guk but Yoo Ra is perfectly fine with a supposed attempted murderer.

Do Guk's poor grandmother. The absolute humiliation at the hands of Yi Joo's grandfather. WTF is this big secret and guilt that Yi Joo's grandfather has? Part of is is knowing how garbage the rest of her family treated her but it has to be more to it. I don't know who's side the secretary is on but there is more to him as well.

Yi Joo made a mess of the brownies, but you know - she listened to Do Guk's mom and tried to cut off the burned pieces. And bless Do Guk for trying to eat them. This scene was funny and full of domestic goodness. Yi Joo is getting more and more affected by Do Guk, judging by the look on her face when he came up behind her to get the ramen. I love that he ate from her bowl and call himself her food tester so she knows it's safe.

It broke my heart to see Yi Joo drawing the boundary between when he asked about what happens if it was a real marriage. Do Guk was so hurt by it but he's still going to try. I think, for Yi Joo, it's a bit of self preservation. No one has ever treated her like Do Guk has and she simply wouldn't believe that his feelings are real.

Yoo Ra desperately throws herself at Do Guk. And honestly, it's pretty pathetic. But Do Guk sees right through her, defends Yi Joo and basically calls Yoo Ra trash. This seems to have broken her and we are going to get her true villain arc. It will be really rough times ahead if she teams up with Jong Wook.

Speaking of Jong Wook, I suspected that when Do Guk showed some of his cards at that meeting Jong Wook would use it against Do Guk. He absolutely chose that meeting place very specifically and called Yi Joo and Do Guk there separately. To see their reactions.

The nightmares that Do Guk has is tied to whatever really happened on that boat (there is zero chance he pushed his brother over). And the poor man is having a full blown panic attack because he cannot cross the bridge over water. No matter how much he desperately wants to go to Yi Joo, he is absolutely terrified of the water. Yi Joo looks so scared when he passes out. I think that this will help solidify their relationship - for her to learn he has traumas and demons he's dealing with. I am even more excited for their mutual healing and revenge story.

[bewilderedbunny]

Weedman (Eddie x Reader fluff) 18+only!

This was originally going to be smut but I got distracted by the idea of flirting with Eddie while he makes bad jokes. Just over 800 words, no pronouns are used for reader.

Warnings: Lots of drug use talk, reader's mom speaks of food in a negative way, there's a joke about sex work but it isn't at any sex-workers' expense (it's just Eddie being silly) reader is a stressed out college student, I think that's all.

*I also wanted to mention, I did not come up with the joke Eddie makes at the beginning of the phone call, it's just something I've heard around and I'm not sure where it originates from

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Part 2 is here

You had just finished exams for your Junior year of college and you were drained. Normally, you would stay in the city while working for the summer, but this year you decided to take a break and go back home to stay with your family. You had hoped this time off would provide some much-needed relaxation. Speaking of relaxation, you had become a bit of a pothead while away from home. The amount of weight that magic little flower would lift from your shoulders was incredible. You hadn't smoked in high school, but you remembered the local dealer at the time. "Reefer Rick" how could you forget a name like that? Unluckily for you, Rick was picked up last month and wouldn't be out until your break was long over.

You thought this may be for the best. You had been smoking pretty regularly to help alleviate the stress of school, maybe a tolerance break could help reset your nerves. Then that night your mom asked if you were really going to have dessert since you already had a roll with dinner. You realized weed might not be enough to get you through this break. Maybe horse tranquilizers or a lobotomy would do the job.

After dessert, which you savored every bite of, you went to your room and decided to try to find a new supplier. After a few unhelpful phone calls consisting of people reminiscing about high school (how could these people miss hell so much?), you decided to call Robert Swan. He was a friend of a friend who seemed to know just about everything about everyone in Hawkins. Robert let you know that Rick had someone dealing underneath him.

"Huh, I never took Rick for the "management" type."

"Well, he's not exactly running a Burger King but yeah, he's making his way up. Oh my god, did you hear about-"

Robert rambled to you, gossiping about people you couldn't care enough about to remember. After "oh really?" and "no way"-ing your way through the conversation, you got the information for the dealer, thanked Robert, and said goodbye before he could trap you into listening any longer.

You sighed while looking at the paper you had written the dealer's information on. "Eddie Munson" the name was unfamiliar to you.

You dialed the number given to you and after a few rings, a man answered.

"Hawkin's mortuary, you kill 'em, we chill 'em. Would you like to make a reservation?" You took a second to process what he said before realizing the joke.

"Yes, please. Embalming table for two?"

He laughed and sounded embarrassed "Oh shit, I thought you were someone else. Sorry about that. Thanks for playing along."

"No problem. Out of curiosity, who did you think I was?"

"My uncle, he calls me on his lunches at work sometimes to check in, it's fun to mess with him, make him laugh."

"That's sweet he checks on you."

"Yeah, I guess it is." Eddie leaned against the wall twirling the phone cable with his finger.

"Oh, who is this, by the way?"

You tell him your name and how you heard about him.

"Words getting around that I'm the new go-to man, huh? Maybe I should make business cards."

You reply, "What would they say? Eddie Munson: amateur herbalist?"

He laughs and says, "Was thinking: 'Eddie Munson: Dungeon Master, Musician, Weedman, Phone Sex Operator.' Maybe add a drawing of a wizard or a dragon too."

You giggle at his silliness and say, "Don't forget to add mortician to that. How's the phone sex business treating you?"

"Not great, still haven't figured out where my dick goes in the phone." you hold your head in your hands and laugh. He laughs along with you.

You look at the clock, it's already midnight.

"I guess I should ask you about buying since that's the reason I called."

"Oh yeah. Shit, this salesman stuff is hard. How much do you want?"

"What can $50 get me?"

"$50 worth of weed."

You roll your eyes "Sounds like a deal. Can we meet tomorrow? Say 10 am?"

"10 am?! What am I, a doctor?! Who gets up at 10 am during the summer?"

You laugh and say, "Sorry, I didn't think about your beauty sleep. Please forgive me. How about 2 pm?"

"He agrees and gives you his address

"It's a date. Have a goodnight, sweetheart."

"Sweet dreams, Weedman."

Once you hang up the phone, you realize you've been bouncing your leg this entire time. You're unsure if it's from the general nerves or the fact that you've been flirting with a stranger. Was that even flirting or were the two of you just idiots? You think about tracking down your old yearbook to see if he's in there, but decide maybe it'll be better to have the mysterious Weedman's appearance be a surprise.

[buckybarnesss]

on fire: a teen wolf novel chapters 1-3

on fire was published on july 17, 2012. the day after raving had aired during the show's second season.

it was written by nancy holder who has written many, many tie-in books for multiple franchises but most notably she wrote novels for the buffyverse.

by tapping nancy holder to write the novel confirms to me that mtv was trying to do what teen wolf's spiritual predecessors did and create tie-in novels with the show and on fire was testing the waters for that.

it did not succeed because teen wolf doesn't have the kind of space for that. the timeline is too tight. teen wolf was part of the new netflix binge era. it had a seasons of 12 episodes that were wall-to-wall plot. there weren't silly filler episodes and they didn't do monster of the week plots.

on fire assumes that you have seen episodes 1-5 of the show but it is also an AU of season 1 post-the tell.

i get the vibe that the author was given notes, some information or like an outline that she used to build a plot so it's interesting to see what tid-bits holder uses and refers to that still gel with canon or is consistent with what we know.

this isn't a novelization of season 1 that's for sure but, hey, i took notes.

i'm going to break the novel up into 3 chapter chunks.

so without further ado let's get into it. on fire: a teen wolf novel or as i've been thinkin of it as.

the novel starts right at the very end of the tell after the parent teacher conferences. 

the way it's described when argent shoots the mountain lion brings to mind the scene in to kill a mockingbird when atticus shoots the rabid dog. chris argent is no atticus finch but he sure does learn to walk a mile in someone else's shoes doesn't he?

i somehow always manage to forget that the tell is the episode where allison turns 17. she doesn’t live to see her 18th birthday. shot through the heart man. 

oh my fucking god scott. the way this is written i imagine holder is trying to invoke derek and kate as if there’s some wild age gap between him and allison when they're like 9 months apart in age. allison is not kate jesus chris. look at this shit:

“scott hadn’t known allison was seventeen, a year older than the other kids in their class -- older than him -- and didn’t want anyone to know.”

Fuck Rafael McCall. Meet me outside and catch these hands.

“he knew his dad wasn’t keeping up with child support payments. not that his mom had ever mentioned it.”

this is where the transition into heart monitor would be. it is a pretty terrifying dream scott has. peter’s such a dramatic bitch. scott’s dreaming of being in the woods with everything on fire and then he’s being compelled by peter to come kill with him. which just reinforces my whole thing about peter and scott being psychically connected. we don’t see this with any other alpha-beta connection to this degree. derek senses victoria killing scott in raving but we really do not get this in the show very much as it seems to be a Dark Sided power. but we do see peter use it again in season 6a with the whole “you were my beta first” scene. 

scott mentions stiles’s having ADHD so to me that means that nancy holder was definitely working with the idea that stiles does have it. stiles having ADHD seems like a plot thread that got dropped really quickly by the show but remained in dylan’s acting choices and in fandom’s mind.

scott is the only beta we see experience sleepwalking episodes. it seems tied to the compulsion and mental link he shares with feral alpha peter.

the entire paragraph is something. firstly, it wasn't until night school, the episode after this one, that peter tried to push scott into killing his “pack”. but lol melissa called stiles scott’s “litter mate” and stiles wearing his target shirt that he wore in wolf moon and the one that subtextually could reference the nemeton and eventually scott's pack symbol. i don't believe we ever actually saw that shirt again. the tragedy.

“stiles had on his bullseye t-shirt, and it kind of freaked scott out when he wore it. as if it meant that stiles were a target. They both knew the Alpha wanted Scott to kill him to cement Scott’s acceptance that he was a member of the Alpha’s pack. Who better to take down than the guy Scott’s mom had once referred to as his “litter mate”?”

this is where it's starting to get kind of weird because the plot of this book takes place during season 1 but it’s not strictly following the plot. it feels like an alternate season 1.

jackson has gone missing. when is he not missing is the more appropriate question? 

so chapter 2 starts with scott and stiles joining lydia and allison at The Popular Kids Table to discuss jackson being missing. this wouldn’t have happened in season 1. this dynamic didn’t exist until at minimum season 3. lydia didn’t even acknowledge stiles’s existence until the winter formal at the end of the season. 

jackson’s parents apparently went to paris right after the parent-teacher conference, leaving their high school age child alone for an extended period of time in the middle of the school year? what? no wonder jackson’s fucked up. why didn’t they just go around christmas and instead they waited another three weeks or some shit. that is weird.

jackson’s been left a note from a supposed private investigator about his birth parents while his parents are out of town, which is totally not sus at all. 🙄🙄 lydia's concerned about him looking stupid so she won’t go to the sheriff and she doesn’t even approach jackson’s best friend danny. like, danny would know a lot more about jackson than scott or stiles would. lydia, i know allison is the one who involved scott but for fuck’s sake. 

look even a page later lydia says “he and jackson barely know each other.” then why are you involving scott in what you seem to believe is a personal matter? 

do people just generally know jackson was adopted? i can see lydia knowing but scott and stiles? allison just fucking moved there so she doesn’t know anything about anyone. this is quite the personal piece of information i doubt he’d want others to know lydia. 

this is such an AU because after the parent-teacher conference stiles was giving scott the cold shoulder due to his dad being hurt. 

also stiles is supposedly sitting at this table the entire time lydia, allison and scott are talking and has not given his opinion on the matter yet. very unlike him. if there's one thing stiles has it's opinions on jackson and his father's job. stiles would be all over this.

this fucking line is brutal man -- “stiles was the only person on the planet who knew he had become a werewolf. well, derek knew, too, but derek hardly counted as a person.” that said, i do think it’s accurate to scott’s headspace at this point regarding derek. avoiding seeing derek as a person is a way of detaching himself from the situation he’s found himself in. 

alright so we’ve got a POV change to allison --a nd it’s all about how cute acott is. allison I love you but chill please. 

okay so this is interesting. “her mom had been angry, too. allison could tell that if had been left up to her, she wouldn’t have been so harsh about having to stay all weekend. her mom liked scott.” are we sure we’re talking about the same victoria argent? granted this is pre-werewolf reveal so as far as victoria knows allison is just mooning over a nice normal human boy but i have a hard time imagining this being the same victoria who gave us the crazy eyes and the sharpening your dick metaphor.

this still haunts me.

"except i won’t get to spend time with scott except at school until i’m, oh, 112.” oh right in the feels

this book really assumes you’ve seen episodes 1-5 of the first season. allison’s mentioning aunt kate and the necklace in a way that makes the assumption the reader knows who and what they are. 

jackson’s password for his tracking app is “captain”. that is worse than the password being lydia or like scott famously having allison as his password. y’all suck and have shitty computer security.

these kids are sophomores in high school and lydia and allison are really having a discussion about jackson going to a pay by the hour motel as if that’s a thing 15-16 year olds do in the california subburbs on a regular basis. as if jackson would lower himself in such a way to begin with. he’s snobby as fuck. it’s such a weird conversation.

i am page 20 and i feel like so far this author hasn’t been very nice to stiles. not having him say a word in the lunch conversation about jackson despite not only being very opinionated about jackson whittermore’s general existence he’d also have thoughts on a missing person. like, he didn’t even speak when his dad was brought up as a possible avenue of help which is odd. then about a page later there’s this sort of tone used around stiles that feels condescending about him being hyperactive.

this paragraph is, uh, something that could’ve only been written in 2012 because it feels gross:

“lydia shrugged. then she turned to allison. “tell you what. if the boys are willing to the motel for us ---” “to a motel. to look for a guy,” stiles said. ”maybe you should ask danny?” danny, their lacrosse team goalie, was gay, out and proud. “he could act, you know, more casual about it.”

that said, it does track with stiles being overly occupied with the perception of his sexuality and that danny does shit he’s way too young to be doing which is written around his sexuality. remember the whole older boyfriend and going to the jungle thing is season 2? 

it has been like 23 pages and allison’s got this subplot where she wants to have sex with scott. like girlie you’ve known scott for 2 days, keep your pants on. (it keeps coming up with scott too and it's annoying, okay).

it took stiles barely a paragraph to mention derek hale when the point of view switched to him. sir. 

i’m laughing at how derek’s point of view is paired with stiles in the way that scott and allison’s are. even in the non-canon book the Sterek Agenda is there. 

“a prankster with a wicked sense of humor.” is what derek refers to peter as before the fire. is that what we are calling it derek because i would disagree.

“i dreamed of other alphas coming after me. why? it’s not a crime to kill an alpha. i’m a werewolf. the way we progress in status is through challenge.” now this is an interesting perspective. werewolves progress via challenges. that's still sort of in-line with what we see in canon.

allison and scott are driving into the seedier side of town. AKA what seems to be where the poors live. scott describes seeing boarded up buildings, pawn shops and “some kind of clinic where you could sell your blood.” which I assume is a plasma center where people donate and get paid in return and this little classist shit says “remind me to never get a blood transfusion.” god he’s such a 16 year old..

i saw kate's name on the next page where chapter 4 is

[hyunnows]

WHO YOU GONNA CALL? | TAPE #1

A series of tapes describing Namjoon's life since joining the Supernatural Investigation Unit.

PAIRING(S) | Namjoon x reader

THEMES | cop!au, x-files!au, ghostbusters!au, cop!Namjoon, cop!reader, youtuber!Seokjin, youtuber!Taehyung, ghosts, conspiracies, cryptids, the paranormal, and the supernatural are main subjects

WORD COUNT | 1.1k+

RATING | pg

NOTE | im so excited for this series im ngl--not sure how frequently i will be updating yet but i think once every two or three weeks? I dont want to take it too seriously (especially since it will probably flop) but oh well... also i know i should have posted this before halloween but it would be too close to the release of 'a love so beautiful' and i want to try to release fics consistently again so i have to keep these a bit spaced out. any this was a new style of writing for me, so i really hope you all enjoy this <3 if you would like to join the taglist, feel free to rb, or reply letting me know--or you can check out my taglist form as well <3333 have a great day/night!

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“So how did it all begin?” A man in a dark suit looms over the metal table, his words echoing off the brick walls and two-way mirror as he adjusts the large camera.

A more timid man sweats under his stare, looking into the camera’s lens awkwardly. “Well, it was the day of my promotion,”

“You’re going to kill this interview,” the brunet mumbles to himself, fixing his tie for the third time. “You’re going to do great and get promoted. Then you’ll finally be a detective.”

He huffs as his tie becomes undone, reaching for one of his clip-ons instead before putting it back down. “You have plenty of time Namjoon, you can correctly fix your tie. A real detective wears real ties.”

He stares in the mirror, continuing to prepare himself. “I’m going to ace this interview. They’re going to like me, I’m going to be likable. Calm, put together, and ambitious—but not too ambitious, I’m going to be grateful for the opportunity. I’m going to get the position, and make mom and dad proud.”

“At least, I thought it was a promotion,” Namjoon almost sulks, arms crossing at the memory. 

“This isn’t a promotion interview, Officer Kim. You’re being transferred to the Supernatural Investigation Unit,” Chief Yoon sighs, leaning forward. “I’m sorry to have misled you.”

“The Supernatural Investigation Unit?” The suited man repeats, leaning toward Namjoon.

“Yeah, everyone called it the X-Files though, like the show.”

“Continue.”

“The thing is, we don’t really have the budget to keep the X-files up, but we don’t have enough to take them down either. I need you to debunk the work going on in there, so we can submit a legit request to get the unit removed.” Mr. Yoon’s voice rumbles out, the crinkles by his eyes appearing as he looks at Namjoon with a serious look. “Listen, if you get our evidence, and I’ll get you a promotion, deal?”

“Obviously I wanted the promotion, so I agreed.”

“Is that the only reason you were chosen to fulfill this job?” the interviewer asks, the same monotone voice filling the room.

“I wish, but it was because of my past,” Namjoon sighs, “I used to be really into ghosts. I wrote reports on it, took video evidence, documented everything so that I could find proof about them. Back then, I also had a YouTube channel with my friend–we were pretty popular at the time. Anyway, I ended up writing a book on it before deciding to leave it all behind to become a serious detective.”

“And are you a detective now?”

“No, look at me,” he gestures to the modified hazmat suit draped across his figure. “How many detectives do you know that wear ghost gear and thermal goggles?”

The interviewer looks at him, unamused and urgent for him to continue his retelling.

“I look up our old stuff and see that new copies of my book are for sale, and that the channel is still up and running–both with my name still on them. So I decided to track down my friend and have a chat with him.”

“Yah! I’m getting the door, stop nagging at me!” Namjoon taps his foot impatiently, hearing the all too familiar voice approach the door. “How can I help–Namjoon? What are you doing here?”

“Hey Jin, I was hoping I could talk to you about the book and the old channel.”

The older man nods his head in recognition, opening the door to allow the taller male in. “Have you seen how well they’re doing? The book is selling pretty well and the channel is blowing up pretty quickly these days,” he says, too enthusiastic for Namjoon’s liking.

“That’s actually my problem,” Namjoon starts, dodging all the odd equipment and supplies scattered around Seokjin’s floor. “I’m sorry, what is going on here?”

Seokjin motions for Namjoon to follow, walking into the nearest door to the left. Upon entering, the cop is met with a makeshift lab filled with beakers, random devices, steam, and many other chemicals Namjoon can’t imagine to be safe. Not to mention one slightly tidier corner of the room with a camera facing a small desk, a corkboard up behind him. Namjoon immediately recognizes the set-up. “This is where we’ve been operating from recently.”

“We?”

“Oh, right. I have a new partner, give me one second,” Jin sticks his head out of the room, inhaling a large breath and bellowing, “Taehyung!”

“Stop yelling!” A younger guy grunts as he enters the messy room.

Seokjin grins, “This is Taehyung, mechanical genius, and my partner.” Taehyung gives a small smile and wave, removing Jin’s arm from his shoulder with a shrug. “Back on track though, what’s going on, why are you here?”

“I need you to erase me from those videos–take them down, even. If you really need to keep them, private them. The book too, I want my name off of it. They’re ruining my life, they’re–”

“Haunting you?”

“Really?” Namjoon groans, a dour expression on his face at the attempt to joke. 

“We argued for a bit, and he refused and pried until he found out about my transfer. That didn’t make anything better for me.”

“How so?”

“Instead of understanding where I was coming from, he just kept telling me how ‘this was my chance to live my dream’.” He deflates a bit. “When we were kids, everyone made fun of us for being the ‘ghost kids’. Even our teachers, parents, and everyone thought we were crazy. I remember my mom telling me how she wanted me to be normal so bad.”

“I take it you come from a not-very-accepting neighborhood?”

“Not at all. Those people didn’t like anything abnormal in the slightest. You should have seen how happy everyone was when we left for college,” Namjoon laughs dryly. “It was really messed up for some dorks like us growing up.”

Namjoon straightens himself in the uncomfortable metal chair. “We both wound up going to college together, I took criminology, profiling, and forensics. He took a medical path, with a few courses in human behavior and psych, I think. We were in a robotics club in high school and took engineering for a bit before dropping the class.”

“During college, we still made our videos and stuff. We made the book then too, 300 pages of paranormal bullcrap we put together over a few years. Because of our educations, we considered ourselves to be a pretty credible source for the paranormal.”

“Why did you stop?”

“I got tired of being seen as a joke. I wanted to be important,” his face is void of any emotion as he recalls the day he told Seokjin he would be leaving for the police academy and packed up his things. “So, I joined the police force. I did a few years as a mall cop, then started getting assigned more important cases and assignments slowly. Then one day, I was getting ready to be Scully to somebody’s Mulder.”

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[orpheuslookingback]

Okay I think this is my ultimate ranking of episodes this season (from least favorite to favorite) (including the Christmas special but not the 60th specials)

(under the read more because it got long lol)

9. Space Babies: Ultimately was the weakest in the season imo. It's not an absolutely awful episode but its not particularly good either.

8. The Church on Ruby Road: More fun/exciting parts than Space Babies but overall just an okay story. The thing working most in its favor is that it did do a really good job of immediately showing how good Ncuti Gatwa is in the role though, like his charisma and personality were instantly apparent in his first full episode. Though tbh that's less the episode ultimately and more just how well suited he is for the part

7. The Devil's Chord: The first three of the season (including the special) were ultimately the weakest imo, but of them I liked this one the most. Loved Jinx, thought they absolutely killed it in the part. Thought the sequence where everything was silent for a bit was really cool. But mostly another "just ok" story. The episode being solved by the The Beatles stopping an ancient entity through the power of friendship kind of made me giggle too, lol.

6. Empire of Death: Started strong for me but ultimately was a bit disappointing. I still don't totally hate the reveal that Ruby's mom is just a normal person (if that ends up remaining that case and there isn't some further secret that's being hidden from us), but I do wish there was a better explanation as to why weird things were happening around her, or at least that the explanation we got had felt better set up by the narrative itself (I agree w/ people who are saying it works basically okay thematically but it just doesn't feel like it should work in-universe based on everything we've seen and were told). Ultimately I guess my issue is that I prefer fair-play mysteries and this ended up not feeling like one. I don't want to be given a bunch of clues and then basically be told "and none of them actually mattered". Like introducing red herrings is one thing but saying that there was actually no real mystery at all- unless you've set that up in a super thoughtful and clever way- is ultimately just frustrating. If it had turned out the mother herself was a normal person but that there was actually Something Else going on with Ruby that was causing things or Something Else actively causing weirdness surrounding her mother despite the mother herself being normal, it would have worked better than some hand wavey "she was important because you thought she was important" thing. Again though for all I know there's still something else to be learned there and this ending was a bit of a mislead. But I don't know that it feels like that's what's being set up at this stage.

5. Boom- A good solid stand alone story. Like I wrote in a post after it aired I think Moffat's a pretty good writer most of the time, just a not very good showrunner- he can introduce concepts but is not good at sustaining them- and his stand alone episodes consistently range from pretty good to great. This one was on the "pretty good" end. But was another good showcase episode for Ncuti Gatwa in that he was able to really sell the role in an episode where he was literally standing in one spot the whole time for 90% of it.

4. 73 Yards- Does it ultimately make a ton of sense? Not really. But it was still a compelling episode to watch. I do like getting the occasional Doctor-lite episode, it can be a good way to shake up the formula a bit and/or deepen our understanding of a Companion character. I think this did the former more than it did the latter (we did get some development for Ruby here but ultimately I do think as a character on the whole she suffered from being kind of more a plot point than a fully rounded person and the way this episode worked didn't totally help that. Also why ultimately having the mystery surrounding her not really mean anything was kind of frustrating. I don't know that she was a strong enough character on the whole to have earned that). Still- I really enjoyed this episode and I thought the basic concept behind it was compelling.

3. The Legend of Ruby Sunday- Maybe I should drop this one in my ranking a little because the payoff ended up being just okay but even so. The excitement and execution of the ending of the episode itself was so fun to watch live that it still sits pretty high in my ranking, even though I didn't love the second part that much.

2. Dot and Bubble- I wasn't disliking this episode at any point but it's the ending that really elevates the whole thing and ties it together. If it were just a very basic shallow "phones and social media are bad" message it would've been just mediocre but using that as a semi-misdirect and then making you realize at the end that everything has been about racism and privilege and how those are also exacerbated by things like social media was really well executed. Honestly the kind of "we're setting you up to focus on one thing but then making you realize there's been the evidence for a different thing to be true right in front of you all along" that the finale could have used! So the fact that they pulled it off for a stand alone episode but couldn't for the season arc was a little frustrating. Anyway. Very good episode. Also Ncuti Gatwa's performance in the final scene. Once again. Sooooo good. I love 15.

Rogue- It's fun, it's gay, Jonathon Groff is in it, idk what else to say lol. It was such an enjoyable episode to me and I hope we see Groff's character again (it felt like they were implying we would at some point. I think. I hope). Also kind of good proof though that they need to be bringing in new writers consistently and not having every episode be penned by the same three people. Not that I dislike all the other episodes (I didn't) but it's just good to have new people bringing ideas in too.

Overall: Ruby was an okay companion for me; Millie Gibson gave a really good performance but the writing for the character was a little weak imo. As I already wrote above I think her role as a plot point/ongoing mystery ended up dominating her presence in the season and she wasn't given that much of a clear, rounded personality outside of it, and when you tie so much of a character up in a mystery that ends up meaning basically nothing...I feel like the character as a whole doesn't work great. This version of The Doctor, on the other hand, I loved. Not only is Ncuti Gatwa absolutely killing it in the role, but I really like the way 15 is being written as a character overall, too.

I would call this a basically middle of the pack season for me? Though probably at the upper end of the middle. No absolute clunkers but also the majority of the episodes ranged from "pretty good" to "okay". I enjoyed Rogue the most but I feel like Dot and Bubble was probably the closest to a "signature" episode for the season.

I do look forward to what's to come. I am happy to have RTD back and thought this was a better season on the whole than any of 13's seasons (I'm so sad about how weak they were because I think Jodie Whittaker was literally doing everything she could with her performance and was just getting so little to work with in terms of writing. She deserved way better), and even better than some of the Moffat seasons (namely 11's last season which I just. Do not like.) but not as good as any of the seasons of his original run. I don't mind him staying on as showrunner for another season or two but after that I kind of hope they bring in someone totally new with no or very little prior connection to previous showrunners. A really fresh voice might be good for the show.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for venting?

(Couldn’t think of a better title I’m sorry/TW for talk of suicide)

Alright so a bit of backstory. I (15M) have a younger sibling who I’ll call L (13NB). L has a friend group that I kinda got sucked into consisting of V (13NB) and N (13M) (& another few people who weren’t as involved and I haven’t talked to much/at all). So the group was recently in quite a lot of drama that I for the most part won’t get into because it isn’t relevant & I want to maintain as much anonymity as possible but 4 important details are:

1.There is a group chat that the 4 of us are one (that I ended up muting for my own sanity)

The drama was mostly between V and N

L mostly took N’s side and I was mostly on V’s

I thought the drama was (for the most part) the stupidest thing ever (specifically in terms of the topic vs the reaction)

Now here’s the part where I might be TA. I was getting sick of the constant fighting and it got to a point where I was being dragged into it more. Partially for a small thing that I understand I shouldn’t have done but mainly for something that both then and now while I 100% do not regret. Now I’ve typed this sentence a million times trying to find a way to say what I did vaguely but all of it just kinda makes me seem like an AH for the thing I’m not even asking about so I’ll just say what they were mad at me for. Earlier in the drama N sent a post to the group chat basically saying “Fuck you. This situation is so stressful for me and I’m going to kill myself or at least try” which caused me (who has a history of seriously suicidal friends & suicidality myself) to have a panic attack and text & call his mom (who from what I’d seen & heard was pretty understanding of that sort of thing) at 10PM about it (keep in mind I had a similar thing happen to me a couple years ago except I was the one who’s mom was being called in the middle of the night mid panic attack). I didn’t want anyone to know who told her because I didn’t want to make the drama worse but a few days later I let slip to L that I was the one who told and they told N from there. (sorry that wasn’t really relevant but I couldn’t think of a shorter way to say it.) Anyway, back to what actually happened. I got fed up with them and vented at first to a few tumblr mutuals (no names or accounts were mentioned and it was all to people who didn’t know them) and then when it got worse I made a post about it, first making sure to block N (L doesn’t use tumblr and in retrospect I should’ve blocked V too but I didn’t think it was necessary because IDK they were the ones being yelled at/made fun of/whatever by L and N) and again, didn’t mention any names or urls, just stuff that was said in the group chat. Anyway V ended up showing L and N the posts and they got pretty mad (which TBF I understand) and long story short after yelling in the group chat I wasn’t paying much attention to both of them at different times ended up talking to me on PMs and they both apologized to me/I apologized to them and whatnot and this post is ABSOLUTELY NOT about calling anyone TA for anything except what I’m specifically asking. What I’m asking is AITA for talking to those people and making those posts? I wasn’t doing it to spread rumors or to vaguepost (if I was I wouldn’t have taken the care to make sure they didn’t see it and no one knew who they were) I was doing it because I was pissed and seriously felt like I was going insane, but also I do understand why they’re mad. So AITA?

PS: if you think you might be one of the people involved here I just want to make it clear I’m not doing this to start or continue anything. I’m just doing this because I’m curious about whether I’m in the wrong objectively for this specific thing. When I said I hated drama and it takes a serious toll on me I meant it, I really just want this situation over and would rather it not start up again because of a post (which is why I’m sending this on AITA and not making a normal blog post). Also sorry everybody for the bad formatting 😅

What are these acronyms?

[aidansloth]

Random Gareth Emerson Headcanons:

this is literally the 3rd part of these, and yes, the hyperfixation on this sweet boy is still here (tw, I also accidentally deleted the past version of this and the suicidal tendencies really kicked in yk)

he's a Gryffindor, maybe a bit Hufflepuff but mostly Gryffindor

for my Percy Jackson fans, he's either Ares' or Hermes' kid

he's the type to dye red streaks in his hair after a mental breakdown at 3am

his pajamas consist of red checkered pants and a band tee (I'm looking respectfully sir👀)

is a theatre kid

he puts on full shows in his bedroom when his sister walks in and he SHREEKS

can you IMAGINE him singing at the top of his lungs Say My Name or The Room Where It Happens

he's a History and Science nerd, but is somehow shit at Maths

I'm sorry but he looks like he's about to ask you if you have games on your phone

he has SO MANY HOODIES and you get to steal all of them

don't know if I already said this but he's usually short on money so he handcrafts most of the gifts he gives and also makes a lot of his own jewelry

because he hasn't got a lot of money he makes the best presents, they're all thoroughly thought-out and personal to the individual

he can sew, maybe just as necessity, he can fix a button or shorten stuff I'm sure

wears mismatched socks on purpose

he wants to get industrial and helix piercings, tattoos too but he doesn't know what to get yet

Modern!Gareth loves Pokémon, has all the games and knows all of their names (it's his hyperfixation yes) and he says his favourite Pokémon is Emboar but it's actually Sylveon (he just thinks it's really pretty)

he looks like an Arcanine

him and his family (mom and younger sisters) have Sunday nights where they watch movies and play boardgames together and have junk food

when he introduces you to the family his sisters instantly invite you to these nights. he tries so hard to hide his excitement but he can't help but smile and giggle at the thought of you getting along with his family so well

his mom is so happy to see her son like this (she also very much loves you)

okay I got off track there

loves sci-fi, especially those stories where humans realize they've been treating robots and cyborgs like shit

also loves books with rebellions (totally projecting)

his favourite Disney movie is Mulan and yes, he currently has a crush on Li Shang (rightly so). he was probably his gay awakening

he uses dried flowers as bookmarks

him and Eddie stim together (Autistic Eddie and Gareth with ADHD)

probably said this already but his most common stim is bouncing his leg and clapping

he hates gum

any sort of gum, doesn't like it at all

his bed is full of cushions

LOVES dragons

he thinks they're so cool, they have FIRE and WINGS and they've got SCALES and they're BIG

always keeps the thing-y from cans (my English just died imsorry) and makes them into jewelry

he has the whole set of tools to do that too

he's also the one that fixes everything in the house

I also think that the whole of Corroded Coffin is going to live together in an apartment

once Jeff woke him up at 4am because a lightbulb went out in his room and didn't know how to turn fix it

that apartment is going to be a mess

no offence to them obviously, but they are teenage boys, what do you expect (I mean this with love I swear)

(for anyone who has read The Raven Cycle, it's going to be like the guy's apartment, even with the toilet in the kitchen)

the times they've forgotten that one of them is taking a shower and walked right in on them are countless

they always try to have some time together, since they're all busy with either work or college (I'm probably going to make another set of headcanons for this, it really just got my brain going)

can't decide if he'd either kill bugs without hesitation or if he'd be the guy to run away screaming

cause I know Eddie frees them into the wild

and I need to know if they're gonna fight about the bug's fate for 3 hours like they're meant to

Gareth would kill for chicken nuggets

i didn't feel like checking spelling so I apologize for any mistakes

[imreallyloveleee]

ok i've finally started season 6 of better call saul (ahhhHHHHHH) so there's no better time than the present for me to vomit out all of my thoughts and feelings on this show thus far

first of all, i already want to start rewatching this show, like, right now, before i even finish it. unreal

my biggest complaint at this point is that i feel they lost the plot with Mike a bit in s5. his is a trickier needle to thread than jimmy's, i think - there's less daylight between parking attendant mike and stone cold fixer mike than there is between jimmy mcgill and saul goodman. but i'm just not convinced that this guy would agree to work for gus fring long-term. i guess we're supposed to believe that the guilt he feels, blaming himself for getting his son killed and depriving kaylee of a dad in the process, is SO overwhelming that he'll willingly do these terrible things so he can "pay her back" with this massive nest egg he plans to build up. but like...this is a conclusion i'm coming to by sitting here overthinking about it, not a conclusion that i feel is coming organically from the show. something just feels off. and i don't think it's intentional, i think they just missed the mark. that said, i liked his "bad choice road" speech to jimmy a lot at the end of the season.

speaking of kaylee, oh my god the scenes with her are goddamn annoying, and the scenes with her mom are even worse. i honestly feel bad for the woman, she's probably not even that bad of an actor but on a show overflowing with people at the absolute top of their game she really stands out as a weak link.

NACHITO 😭 i know he's not gonna make it out of here alive. poor guy. he just really loves his dad!!!!!!!!

Lalo is such a FANTASTIC addition tho. it's so hard to add a compelling character this late in the game but he's so charismatic he even makes me hate Hector Salamanca scenes like 80% less

I could have done with less Gus Fring on this show in general. he was incredible on BrBa, but he just...doesn't need to be fleshed out more? and he kind of isn't, he's just around a lot? idk, but i'll take this as an opportunity to share that one time i saw Giancarlo Esposito wearing a black cowboy hat and buying a package of raw chicken at Whole Foods in Austin TX like 9 years ago

ok now onto the lawyer-y side of things. in contrast to Mike's story, I think Jimmy/Saul's is pretty much pitch perfect. i believe his decisions, i believe his hesitations, i believe the push and pull.

(sidenote just remembered i also deeply hate the salamanca twins, always have always will, on BrBa they always felt like some lame reddit bro's idea of a "badass villain" they're just so flat and boring and i wish they weren't in this show either ugh)

anyway back to Jimmy - obviously, this show would not work whatsoever if Jimmy didn't work as a character, but it's still like, HOLY SHIT do they make him work. he's so tragic, you just KNOW that he could be better and you want him to be better and you know he wants to be better but: he can't. he won't. we know where this story is heading. and at his core he will always be this boy who really really really loved his big brother and never felt that love returned and never will and now i'm going to cry just thinking about the fucking scummy lawyer from breaking bad oh my goddddd

finally: kim. kim. KIM. having only watched 6x01 at this point - i feel like i've only barely scratched the surface on understanding who this character is. i don't know what to say, but i just rewatched this scene and it's maybe my favorite thing i've ever seen, with the exception of like 8 other kim scenes (most of which consist of her dressing down an idiot man, her boyfriend included)

JIMMY AND KIM FOREVER 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 and if you're wondering if i'm having Fic Thoughts, the answer is yes, yes i am

p.s. i've been listening to some of the insider podcast episodes and my GOD what a breath of fresh air to listen to peter gould and vince gilligan after being an unwilling prisoner of roberto aguirre sacasa for 7 goddamn years

[nostalgicfun]

When I was little—very little, so little that I was being pulled in a wagon for this story—I was out on a “walk” with my mom, which consisted of me running around at warp speed for half a block and then having to be pulled in a wagon. And at this particular point in the walk, my mom stumbled across something which as an adult is a pretty cool find: someone had left/lost a bunch of little pieces to the game “Cooties” along the road. 

Upon seeing this, she said, “Oh, look! Cooties!” and scooped them up to hand them to me. 

But I was, again, small and young and inexperienced in the world and all the “Cooties” it had to offer. I had never seen a Cooties game before. In my undeveloped little head, my mom was attempting to hand me a bunch of tiny dismembered limbs. And calling them cooties. I had no idea what was happening. But I did know it was scary, very scary. 

I remember crying and shying away and telling my mom I didn’t want to hold them, and the way she doubled down, insisting that I take the cooties. I didn’t have a very good grasp on mortality at this point in life but was aware that people were capable of being killed, and was convinced those cooties would give me actual cooties and that I’d die. So I covered my eyes and hid at the back of the wagon. 

The fact I would not take these tiny, dirty little game pieces she found along the road enraged my mother, for whatever reason, and I was scolded (loudly) and she refused to talk to me the rest of the way home, having declared that I would have to sit in the “time out chair” (my dad’s La-Z-Boy recliner) until my dad got home from work so he could punish me. 

Of course both my parents being mad at me was always the end of the world. 

It was about an hour and a half until my dad got home and I remember thinking he was going to make me touch the cooties and I’d die and be one of those zombies from “my Link game” (which is obviously what happens when someone dies). He came home, and I heard them exchanging words in the kitchen, and then he came into his dark office where I waited in his chair and turned on the lamp. 

“I heard you weren’t good on a walk with your mom today. What did you do?” I remember him asking sternly. I then proceeded to bawl. I don’t remember my wording but I did tell him about the cooties and how they were scary and I didn’t want to touch them. 

My dad’s face remains etched into my memory forever as if carved there in stone. This king of bikers, this military man with what seemed like a million deployments, trying to figure out what to do with his four year old daughter who was afraid of some dirty board game pieces her mom was trying to make her hold. 

He just said “okay then” and hugged me. I don’t remember what he said after, but basically that I wasn’t in trouble and to go play for a bit before dinner. I remember hearing him go into the kitchen and say “WHAT is your problem” to my mom, which looking back at this now as an adult is a good reaction that entire scenario. 

The next day he came home from work with a “Cooties” game.

[competitivedust]

Hello ✌✌

I know I'm kind of a bit late, I just found out anti tags are actually a thing. I just wanted to say that I love Fitz but at the same time I don't (for obvious reasons) and I wish his stans would actually stop using him being sick as an excuse. Like sure that was bad and he really needs professional help but given their situation at that moment they couldn't, and I'm pretty sure his stans are forgetting that he said he doesn't regret doing it and to mention, he wasn't having a psychotic break when he said that.

And also I'm sick and tired of people siding with Fitz when he said "do you want me to recall all the times that you did?" Like, the times where Daisy "turned her back against them" was because she was manipulated and swayed and she "left them" because maybe she thought that was safer for them. (Don't forget she was having suicidal thoughts and was having withdrawal from Hive)

Like sir??? Turn her back against them??? What about all the times when you ALMOST GOT DAISY KILLED??? (When Fitz jumped into the monolith for an example)

Also I'm kinda pissed that no one went on to comfort Daisy, hell not even Jemma. She only cares if Fitzsimmons are still together or not

I still love the Bus Kids but I deserve the fitzdaisy closure. They could make a whole episode about fitzsimmons in s6 but couldn't for fitzdaisy.

Sorry if this is long 😬😔

Hey nonnie! See I used to love Fitz too. But it was with the assumption that he isn't perfect and lately his behaviour with the team has been getting problematic and that most fans realise that.

Finding out they don't was an experience.

I actually came across a thread on reddit a while back where they were hailing the "do you want me to recall all the times that you did" as such a gotcha against Daisy. And then listing all the times that "she turned her back on them". Which consisted of her trying to help Miles in season 1 (the guy she obviously knew longer and she didn't owe them anything at that point, moreover she turned against him when she realised what he'd done), her siding with Jiaying (completely ignoring the fact that her mom who she had been looking for forever manipulated and lied to her and that SHIELD themselves blindsided her by sending Gonzalez when they were actually expecting Coulson, and still she saw through it all and chose to fight her mother), that time she was under Hive's sway (I don't think I need to elaborate on this), that time she went rogue in s04 (once again not caring that she was grieving Lincoln's death and was freshly free of mind control, lost and suicidal and needed help, not a yelling).

And not to mention that not once did she do anything remotely similar to ambushing a member of the team, strapping them to a table and cutting into them. False equivalencies much?

For a show that's all about empowered women, they not only let a white man get away with violating an Asian woman, but also let him flip the story, discredit her as a victim. These tactics are what domestic abusers use. They make their victim feel as if what happened to them was their own fault. So guess Fitz is a classic abuser now. Good luck with that Jemma.

But hey the fans have decided that Fitz can do no wrong, and the show creators have a huge part to play in that. So really at this point I am not even sure who pisses me off more, the fandom or Whedon and Maurissa.

But honestly I wish I had interacted with fans like you instead of the raging a-holes who were bitching about Daisy being a hardass to Fitz. So thank you for the ask, and for giving me your very nuanced take on the whole thing.

[ezlebe]

If you ever want another request- I thought the bit where Greg is on E in “pins and needles” was pretty fun, I’d love to see more clingy Greg and either disgruntled or entertained Tom depending on the situation

“Why’re you always doing that?”

Tom looks over while furrowing his brow, then glances around before landing back on Greg with a frown. “What?”

“Touching me,” Greg says, dropping his head and peeking down with a fan of lashes against his cheeks to where Tom’s hand is set at his elbow. “See.”

Tom stares too, for a beat, then pulls his hand away with a jerk, consciously taking the other off his hip, and shoves both into his trouser pockets.

“No one else touches me,” Greg says, exhaling a brief, quiet hum while tipping his head back to look at the sparkly ceiling above them. “Except you.”

“They do so,” Tom says, though he can’t really think of a particular instance, not recently, and he twists his fingers into fists in his pockets. “That’s just the E talking.”

“MDMA,” Greg says, quite haughty, but he’s half grinning, too, standing up straighter and squaring his shoulders against the wall that he’s balanced himself on. “It’s actually, like… um.” He breaks into a breathy laugh. “Oh, E is for ecstasy.”

“Such a quick mind, over here – best alert MENSA,” Tom mocks, glancing over when the elevator opens with an almost annoyingly pleasant hum. He steps inside, jerking his chin, and ignores an impulse to more physically grab Greg to pull him in behind him. “Where did you even get it? And you know people dance on it, grind on the floor like horn-dogs, not become big annoying bees that buzz around killing the vibe.”

“It was one of Lukas’ friends, and I, like – I didn’t kill it, Tom,” Greg says, folding himself up and crowding far closer to Tom than the wide car really requires of him. “You said I should – We should leave the casino, so your, um – the so-called vibe was, in fact, entirely self-immolated.”

Tom rolls his eyes, as he pushes the button for the seventeenth floor. It was, perhaps, but only because Greg hovered and interrupted every other statement for a good hour while Tom tried in utter vain to concentrate on speaking rusty Cantonese to a trio of marketers who’s names he cannot recall, even now, but who he met last time he was in Macau. He had been attempting to network in a way that didn’t involve the now-usual mutually assured destruction, so of course his unofficial deputy had somehow found him, among the stirring crowd in tonight’s casino venue of Lukas’ absolutely biased choice, in a low lit corner booth while bumbling and giggly on goddamned E.

The marketers had then consistently referred to Greg as something of a circus act, as far as Tom could translate, and largely because of his height, which hadn’t helped Tom’s mood all that much. He’s not going to admit it, though; at least, not until Greg is sober enough to realize they were even talking about him.

Tom glances down with a start, as Greg’s fingers trail along his arm, flicking at his cuff links and tracing the seam of the sleeve. He looks back to the numbers, spinning up the elevator display, and offers a quiet tut. “You touch, too, Greg.”

“Yeah,” Greg breathes, looking over with one of the wide grins he’s been offering since he popped up at the booth, actually leaning in closer while his long fingers dance up Tom’s arm. “My mom has this friend, like… She would, I think, say you’ve got a good aura.”

Tom raises a brow, as the elevator slows at the selected floor. “That seems highly unbelievable, Gregory. Considering.”

Greg snorts and falls into a wheezy giggle. “Yeah, maybe? It’s just, um... interesting, then? Or maybe only good to me – do you think I have a good aura?”

Tom glances sidelong, as he steps out, feeling a smirk play at the edge of his lips. “Are you serious – you want me to name a color, or something?”

“No, no, it’s like a…” Greg rolls his eyes, as he snickers, rolling his head back and forth along his shoulders. “A sense you get around a person. I guess. Like all my cousins are sort of, like… uncomfortably tacky and sort of car, um – carcinogenic, like fresh road tar, you know, except like Connor, who is more… a-a sticky hand covered in hair.”

“A truly visceral image,” Tom says, peeking at numbers on doors and trying to find the one that had been written on Greg’s keycard holder earlier that day. “So what am I?”

“Oh, um…” Greg hums, then breaks out into a breathy set of unfairly devastating giggles, as he slants hard into Tom’s side. “Gaudy Christmas sweater?”

“Ugly Christmas sweater?” Tom corrects, pointblank, coming to a pause at a door and then looking over at Greg, hesitating a pair of seconds, then reaching out to pat at his jacket. He finds a phone on the inside pocket, yanking it out with a wag in Greg’s face. “Do you even wear those?”

“Not really, but, uh…” Greg pinches his lips together, watching Tom slide the keycard from the back. “I don’t think they’re really, um… that religious? Are they?” He shrugs, looking back up with a lean forward into Tom’s space. “But they’re like warm, and goofy, and… a little itchy.”

“I’m going to find you a really ugly not-Christmassy one, Gregory,” Tom says, flatly, sliding the card into the door with a hard shake of his head; it blips green, thank fuck. “Cheapest wool on the market, feels like the steel kind, and make you wear it.”

“See!” Greg says, overly cheerful at the threat, grabbing high on the back of Tom’s arm to shake him with a pitchy hum. “That’s my – like, totally my point.”

Tom goes for the mini fridge across the room and pulls out an equally mini water, then turns around just in time to take in with a wide blink that Greg is already stripping down. He watches Greg’s long, pasty legs kick off his trousers to settle and wrinkle in a gray puddle on the floor, then sets the water on the bedside table with a flat press of his lips – a dissatisfied moue that just deepens when the jacket joins them.

“Greg, for shits’ sake,” Tom says, rubbing at the inside of one of his brows and concentrating more on the laziness rather than the G-rated nakedness. “You’re not in your own penthouse hovel – pick that up.”

Greg grumbles low and rolls his eyes hard, and he slips into brief, incredulous giggles halfway through, but his suit, somehow, gets largely shaken out and laid across the back of a chair. He forgets to take off his button up, though, or maybe he likes the feel of it, picking up the bottle next to Tom with a contented hum.

“Alright, in you go,” Tom says, throwing the bedclothes and pointing aggressively at the white sheets starched and stretched across the mattress. “I’ll collect you tomorrow for some hungover breakfast and you can tell to me all you got up to tonight that didn’t involve taking candy from strangers. Deal?”

Greg pauses with the bottle, now half-empty, set distractingly on his lower lip. He blinks widely, dropping the bottle while his tongue peek between his lips. “Are you, like… going back downstairs?”

Tom shakes his head, gesturing wider and more emphatically at the bed, until Greg starts to move. He plucks the water from his hands, narrowly saving Greg from spilling it down his front. “I’ve got my own chemical gambling to sleep off, though it’s mostly liquor.”

“So, he-hey, then…” Greg says, an odd grin on his face, as he reaches up grabs at the line of buttons on Tom’s shirt with a wide blink. “Wait.”

“Scared of the dark?” Tom taunts, patting condescendingly around the bony knuckles of Greg’s hand. “The hotel is so new, the only ghosts are of the people who died building it. You’ll be alright.”

He reaches out for the corner of the comforter, as the hand releases him, and doesn’t expect at all for Greg to lurch up from the mattress, let alone kiss him hard. He responds more rashly than rationally, gasping and pressing back while grabbing Greg’s face, as a thousand imagined moments rear from the back of his mind. He gets lost in the kiss for heated seconds, mouth sliding against Greg’s, until he comes back to his senses all at once when Greg’s fingers, again, tug the buttons at his shirt. He shoves away with a harsh breath, quickly shaking his head and holding Greg back from following him .

“Tom?” Greg says, plaintive, brows framing concern around his eyes.

“Look, Greg…” Tom pauses to swallow hard, sweeping his thumb along Greg’s cheek, trespassing and selfish, then forces his hands to drop and grab Greg’s to let go of him. “I get it, you’re so horny you might as well be called Billy and figure I’m up for it, but this would – it might… fuck, ruin me.”

“Ruin you?” Greg repeats, bemused, hands curling into his own chest.

“Just being the closest warm body,” Tom mutters, exhaling a broken laugh while scrubbing at his face. He stands and steps backward, cursing everything he drank, keeping up with the marketers, though really he isn’t sure he’s even past tipsy. “Here’s hoping you’re somehow fucked up enough you won’t remember even trying that.”

Greg’s eyes dart back and forth across Tom’s face, as he slumps into the pillow.

Tom manages to grab the comforter uninterrupted and starts yanking it over Greg, who actually startles at the movement, glancing widely and watching the corner cross his body. “Lay there until you’re off in fucking Oz, buddy. The sheets are nice – that E’s got to make it feel like you’re resting on the prized cushions of a sultan.”

“Um, except…” Greg mumbles, hunching while he grabs the blanket now at his chin. “Tom?”

Tom ignores the implied question and hastily crosses the room, flicking the light off with a heavy smack on the wall. He stays there for a pair of heavy breaths, closing his eyes with a hard swallow, and contemplates fleeing the room entirely, but instead quickly finds himself in the aggressively white-tiled bathroom with a clumsy slide of the pocket door. He inhales deep through his nose, but the exhale falters, and he covers his face with both hands while he tries desperately to make his breathing slow and measured, rather than falling into a humiliating fucking fit.

It doesn’t… What does it matter that Greg kissed him? His head is so stuffed with molly-flavored cotton that he’d have kissed a turnip-headed scarecrow in the same position. It’s not as if – He wouldn’t kiss Tom, if all his marbles were in place, is the broad fact of it.

It really doesn’t even matter.

Or, it shouldn’t, but it does, because Tom wants Greg to want him so bad that a permanent ache has set up under his sternum, and he just accidentally confirmed that Greg might consider him, but it’s when out of his fucking mind. He finally, actually got to kiss Greg, and, yeah, it didn’t even matter, turning it into some ouroboros of collectively no real fucking meaning.

Tom claws his hands across his eyes and accidentally sizes up himself in the mirror, sees his eyes glassy and cheeks splotchy, and barely manages to look away, slapping at the light switch, in time before a choke catches at the back of his throat. He covers his mouth, squeezing his eyes shut, and wills himself, to no avail, to cowboy up or what the fuck ever, rather than fall to pieces in a hotel bathroom. It doesn’t work – it never does, once he’s sunk to this point.

“Tom – ?”

No, fuck. It’s the worst thing that could happen and that’s exactly why Tom is unsurprised that it did.

The bathroom door slides open wider, at a soft thud of knuckles against the panel. “Tommy, are you crying?”

“No, fuck off,” Tom snaps, turning his back to the door and to Greg, scrubbing the best he can at his face, despite the dark, though it doesn’t do a lot for the nasally, croaking quality of his voice. “You’re supposed to be going the fuck to sleep.”

“You are…?” Greg says, fingertips grazing across Tom’s back.

“I’m not,” Tom insists, harshly, as he’s quickly forced into a corner. He tenses up and almost shoves Greg, but the instinct to hide is, for once, stronger, and he gives up wiping at his face to just keep his hands over his eyes. “I’m not.”

“Are you hurt?” Greg says, speaking with careful, earnest concern.

Tom chokes on a laugh mixed with another wet gasp. “No, I - I’m fine, you’re just so fucking high that you’re hallucinating shit.”

Greg touches his shoulder again and Tom flinches, turning around and nearly falling backward into the tub, but Greg easily catches him with his stupid orangutan arms and makes it all worse with a bear hug. If there’s any sort of luck in the world, between the hour and the booze and the drugs, he’ll forget this like a dream.

Tom can’t help but let himself slump at the thought.

“Are you hurt?” Greg asks, again, while his nose digs hard into the side of Tom’s head.

Tom takes one heaving breath after another, giving in and pressing his face fully into Greg’s ugly silk shirt, and shakes his head. “No, buddy,” he lies, voice badly catching in his throat. “I’m… fucking peachy.”

“Are you sure?” Greg asks, painfully sincere in his ear.

“You need...” Tom takes an uneven breath, deciding to forgo another lie, and weakly, awkwardly flapping to press his hands against Greg’s side. “To go to bed. You’re out of your mind… imagining things.”

Greg mumbles a low response, unintelligible but somehow stern, still clutching at Tom despite the attempted jostling; his arms are clasped around Tom to keep him from really moving, like he’s some sort of fussy child. “You, um – you should lay down, too. Okay?”

Tom sighs through his nose. He does, really, feel a bit better, but it’s also in that way just makes him feel even worse in a deeper sense. “Okay,” he echoes, into Greg’s shirt. “…Okay.”

Greg offers another squeeze and a silly sort of rock sideways on his toes, forcing them both one way and the other, then pulls away. It’s seems like he might give Tom a break, until he proceeds to grab, somewhat awfully, at Tom’s hand to tug him back out to the room.

Tom finds himself fully clothed on the other side of the bed, as close to the edge as he can get, and stiffly listening to Greg breathe into the dark a couple feet away while his tacky lashes dry. He thinks he’ll be able to slip out, once Greg is really asleep, and start stage one of his rough plan to gaslight Greg, and himself, into forgetting every major beat of the last half hour or so ever happened.

“Tom,” Greg says, his hand suddenly across the bed and swiping down Tom’s arm in a wide, blind stroke. “I – I… I’m really sorry. I, like – I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Tom says, barely above a mutter, staring up at the faint stream of light through the blackout curtain, where it weakly stretches across the textured ceiling. “I know you didn’t mean it, bud. E makes about anyone look like a ten.”

“I-I didn’t… Wh-what?” Greg sputters, hand sliding up around Tom’s forearm, as he noticeably turns on the mattress, and tightens his grip to painful squeeze. “Anyone?”

It takes everything in Tom not to turn on his side away.

“I like knew you were you, Tom,” Greg says, voice pitching theatrically incredulous, sounding a bit unwelcomingly like he once had in that supposed panic room, but hopefully that means the high is fading, too. “Did you – do you really think I didn’t?”

“Greg –” Tom swallows hard, closing his eyes, as Greg’s other hand abruptly sweeps up clumsily and boldly against his face. He should shove him away, but he… just doesn’t want to, not again.

“That is not true at… at all – that’s awful,” Greg says, as he trespasses entirely across the polite barrier splitting the mattress and bodily curls around Tom, pressing his nose into the hollow of his cheek and mouth turning in close to his ear. “I wasn’t like, uh – like just trying to ki-kiss anyone. Else, I mean. Just you, Tom.”

Tom keeps his eyes closed; for all the room is already dark, he doesn’t want to risk a glimpse.

“So you’re not – um, not a ten, maybe, but you’re like an eight?” Greg says, fingers still rubbing up and down Tom’s arm, trapped now between them, tracing markedly against his wrist bone and then halfway up the center of his forearm along the tendons. “I really like you, but it-it’s hard to sometimes, too, so… that’s a couple off?”

Tom offers a half-hearted attempt at a scoff.

“I swear, it’s not… It wasn’t only the high? I really just think a-a lot about that first night we went out, I guess,” Greg whispers, breath warm and palpable, then he moves his head, so his lips ghost pressure with every spoken word, “And, um, you know, how I went home with you after and you helped me to bed then, too, but… I just – I-I didn’t want the same nothing to happen. Tonight. You know? I am sorry.”

Tom actually doesn’t know, no, because he’s damned sure Greg cannot be fucking serious about wanting anything more intimate than a clap on the shoulder that particular night; he had also, literally that very same day, told Tom he was incredibly mean. He doesn’t think Greg is so fucked in the head. …Probably.

“Tom?”

“Just…” Tom breathes a thin sigh. “Finding you difficult to take seriously, as usual.”

“That’s because you’re sad,” Greg says, sighing into Tom’s cheek, as he cradles the opposite in his palm, thumb sweeping the sensitive skin beneath an eye. “You were crying, because of that… of me.”

Tom thinks he might come close to cracking a tooth, he clenches his jaw so hard.

Greg keeps fondling Tom’s face, up and down, then back again, and his distraction becomes evident in a sudden, winding hum. “Your skin feels nicer than the sheets.”

Tom raises his brows as a laugh breaks weakly from his throat, peeking over in the dark to Greg’s face, visible only by being not even an inch away. He’s staring back, near unblinking, and perhaps has been that way since he reached across the bed. “That is… pretty creepy, bud.”

“True, though,” Greg murmurs, pressing closer with a curve of his fingers down Tom’s jaw to his neck. “Yeah, yeah. Soft.”

Tom takes a careful breath while watching Greg watch him, as fingertips trace down along his neck and throat.

“I think I, uh – I could find you in the dark,” Greg says, humming with a marked self-satisfaction, continuing his maddening human topography mapping with little touches down Tom’s shirt collar and along his collarbone. “I sort of did, I-I guess, but like… real dark. Anywhere. I could just touch you, and – ”

Tom clears his throat, then awkwardly elbows and squirms, rearranging the giant octopus trying to asphyxiate him with feelings, so he can be slightly less lifeless participant. “Fucks’ sake, Greg,” he says, digging his fingers into Greg’s soft, slightly mousse-tacky hair with a scratch. It confirms a months ago, absent admittance from Greg, as he immediately murmurs soft and goes limp on Tom’s shoulder. “Just go the fuck to sleep, you hopped up, second-rate cuddle monster. I’m about to file a complaint somewhere.”

Greg offers a breathy huff, tucking himself even closer, and perhaps cheerfully spiteful, with a knobby knee hooking boldly along Tom’s thigh. It’s not a well-ventilated hotel room, it feels like, all but an outright scam at the price, so it’s going to be a very warm night, but maybe not a bad one.

He moves again, some many minutes later, arm stretching across Tom’s chest while he breathes a heavy, loud sigh straight into his ear. “Will you take it seriously, maybe, if I do it again in the morning?”

“I don’t know,” Tom admits, as heat prickles across his cheeks, yet also suffering a tired flicker of annoyance; he’s warm, and was near sleep, and forgot E is a fucking upper. He wonders, for a ludicrous beat, if he should’ve taken Greg out for walkies.

“What about…?” Greg exhales an uneven, murmuring hum, plainly jumping between thoughts. “You know, near lunch, then. And dinner. As in, a sort of, as well as?”

Tom mumbles through a smack of his lips. “…Maybe.”

[misterewrites]

Year Two and a Halfish (Threads of Fate)

Hi! E here still alive. Been. a while. Sorry if you were expecting updates sooner my laptop was having some serious black screen issues and every attempt at sending it to get repaired is getting stonewalled and honestly it's infuriating and yeah. That happened. Hopefully this time it gets properly fixed and i can go back to writing consistently. I'm just using my mom's laptop to write in the meantime.

So it's super late but Merry Christmas @hains-mae! WOO! this is her gift that she requested at the time (I was pretty surprised when she wanted me to write this story but then i was promptly told she wanted her Solider Poet King for her birthday so that explained everything haha.

I started working on this a few days ago and unfortunately something happened here in America relates in a small part to the story. Honestly maybe I'm overreacting or overthinking it but I also know a lot of people read this story and i rather be overly prepped than accidentally not doing enough

Mae wanted a situation where Jason loses it after you, the reader, is injured. She gave me little requests like Robin's line and has to end in all warm feel goodness (cuz i am not legally allowed to write angst haha) so I have chosen that the reader is shot in the shoulder.

Yeah my little thing makes sense now.

It gets a bit intense, maybe? I can never tell cuz I'm writing it. Like i said I could be overthinking this but heads up. It also does end very sweet and homely and all that goodness so no worries. If you don't feel like reading it I understand.

Stay safe everyone. Lose yourself in a story whether it be mine or someone else's and just relax. breath. It'll be okay. Even if it seems like a lot right now.

So yeah hopefully I'll have my laptop fixed and we're all good but at least for now i have an alternate means of writing! Next is probably Mirror's Edge, Mae's birthday gift, Mirror's edge, another gift i owe but that's a personal one that won't be posted.

Be safe, take care of yourself and your loved ones. Wear masks (i know i know but remember you can pass them on to people with compromised immune systems.) remember to get the vaccine or booster cuz it'll help make it bearable. It's okay to just exist and be and let the world pass you by. One step at a time together. Also vaccine worldwide push for it cuz it's important and frankly whatever you feel is important. The issues that matter to you and remember. It'll be okay.

That's it for me! E is out have a great week and i'll see you really soon!

If you want to read this from the start you can find the whole story on this really awesome site right here! https://archiveofourown.org/works/29955270/chapters/73737858

For the rest of my work that includes some awesome original work (so i am told haha) Arcane Legend of Zelda and Soul Eater you can find that over here https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrE42/pseuds/MrE42

Summary: A few months later, you are trying to get to work when a very unfortune thing happens. For better or worse Red Hood is saving the day.

-----

It’s pretty cold right now. I…I don’t recall ever feeling this cold before.

Wait. That’s not…true. I think. I’m pretty sure I’ve been this cold before.

Have I?

Whenever Mister Freeze has a snow day it gets really cold.

I feel for him, I do but...

God it’s cold. Or is it warm? My head is warm. Hands not so much. Feet freezing too.

Am I cold? I can’t tell. Everything is a lot right now. The floor is damp I know that much. I can see my breath frozen midair for a moment.

Someone is yelling, waving something towards me from overhead but I can’t focus. Everything’s a bit blurry.

Why does my side hurt? Fuck did I pull something again? I really hope not. I have work tomorrow. Eww wet too. Did I spill something?

Wait, no. Today. I have work today. Right now I think. What time is it?

Shit why do I feel weak? Arm’s shaking too. I didn’t forget to eat again did I? Ugh Jason’s going to kill me.

Hee, Jason. He’s soooo handsome. I have no idea why he wants out hang with me though. He is way out of my league. Like he’s fucking Batman’s son! HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO IMPRESS THE ACTUAL SON OF BATMAN!?

Mister Wayne? Bruce? Bruce. No not Bruce. I’ve never met him, I don’t think I can be on a first name basis with freaking Batman if I’ve never met him. Well him him. I’ve been saved by the bats before. Few times actually.

I should really thank him for Jason. He’s just amazing.

Okay so maybe I drank a lot. Why am I thinking of Jason?

Ugh, this asshat is yelling at me still. What the hell does he want? He’s talking to me right? Ugh my head’s pounding, I can’t hear anything.

The guy seems frantic, keeps looking back expecting something but I have no idea what. He just keeps gesturing to his open hand. What the fuck does he…

FUCK! That’s right this asshole shot me!

I wince as the sound turns back on all at once: The angry honking of impatient drivers, the numbing chatter of a thousand people living in a concrete jungle as one. The adrenaline is making my senses so sharp I can hear the dripping water splatting against the cold floor of the alley.

I must’ve gone into shock without realizing it. I mean I was just shot so can you blame me?

My shoulder is burning with a white hot pain I only felt twice in my life: Once when Bane slammed a mailbox into me and when I was 12 and I was really trying to…

You know what? Not important. More pressing matters right now.

I remember now that my flight or fight kicked in: I was late to work and I tried cutting through an alley for a shortcut.

Terrible idea in Gotham I know but this one was brightly lit. I didn’t think anyone was stupid enough to try anything.

So naturally the universe decides to give me the one stupidest person who would try.

He waves his gun at me again (it was a gun. Duh.) but honestly I’m too wired to care. Plus he shot a hole in my favorite jacket! AND IT’S GOT BLOOD RUNNING DOWN IT! DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO GET BLOOD OUT OF CLOTHING?! Really fucking hard.

Oh. Shit. I’m bleeding out. That’s probably important too.

I try to pick myself off the floor but he takes a step forward, threatening me with the gun again.

“I’ll shoot!” he yells.

Even now, with the last possible moments of my life slipping away, I can’t help but be a smartass.

“You already did you asshat! Shooting me again isn’t gonna make me want to give you my money anymore than the first time!”

Gonna die as I lived: Sassy.

He clicks the hammer on the gun, prepping it to fire again.

I…I feel numb. The adrenaline lessens the pain but it’s still mind dumbing. I just want to scream and fight and yell and go down swinging.

But that’s not who I am. I’m not some superhero or even a regular hero. I’m just a person trying to make my way through this chaotic journey called life. I couldn’t even get up and now because some idiot wants the 10 bucks and a very, very old video rental card to a place that doesn’t exist anymore in my wallet, it was about to end.

I could feel fear bite at my resolve, a dreadful overwhelming sense of finality wash over me. Goosebumps crawled down my skin, the air felt stuffy and too cold all at once as time slowed to a crawl.

I….

I can’t even think.

I’m just scared. I don’t want to go out this way.

I took a deep breath and close my eyes.

I think of my mom, waiting for my phone call later.

I think about Jason Jr, a cat I adopted by accident cuz he had streak of white that was way too familiar. Feed them once and every Jason refuses to leave you.

I do my best to not think of him but Jason Jr leads to Jason the human: His piercing blue eyes that feel like he’s seeing deep into my soul. His messy black hair with that one streak of white that made him so iconic, so distinct from his brothers. The various knicks, tiny bruises, cuts and scars from years being Robin then the Red Hood. Invisible from afar but so, so clear up close.

I can hear his laugh, mostly teasing but with a hint of warmth when I do something dumb. The way shows off his prowess with a knife and how proud he beams when I clap excitedly. Wide smirks when we get into one of our playful chats and jabs. The small smile that graces his lips when he thinks I’m not looking. The quiet thoughtful look when something troubles him. A distance gaze only someone who has experienced for too much has.

I see Jason in my mind but I don’t want that. I want to look him in eye when he tries to be all broody and cool. I want to mess with his hair and tease him about his terrible tastes in books. I want to see him again!

Not like this. No fucking way. I have no idea how I’m going to go but I refuse to let it be like this.

I snap out of my stupor, time seemingly unmoved by whatever deeply reflective crap I just did.

He still has his hand on the gun. I’m still on the floor and this still sucks.

I prep my body, tensing and wincing from my aching shoulder but I try not to be distracted. One shot and whether it works or not, I’m not going to go quietly.

“JUST GIVE ME YOUR MONEY!” the man screams hysterically.

“Fuck you.” I spit out as I’m ready to make my move.

The red string tied around my finger slackens, distracting me at a really bad time but suddenly goes taut like someone is pulling at it.

A thud is all I hear and suddenly the guy is gone. Just vanished into thin air.

I weakly try to stand but my legs turn to jelly and honestly I’m not in fight or flight anymore. I’m in “the floor is nice and solid and I’m just gonna lay here” mode.

So I do just that and fall back on the floor and decide to exist for like the next ten minutes.

I mean I would’ve if something didn’t pick me up.

“Are you okay?” A voice asks, young. Younger than me at least.

“Umm.” I smartly reply.

The young man hums thoughtfully “You’ve been shot.”

“Yeah. That thing.”

“Shock.” He concludes before slipping my good arm over his neck and helps me over to a wall. I take this sec to look and am unsurprised to find Red Robin at my side.

“JA.…” Someone else from above calls out, nearly saying a full name before realizing his mistakes “HOOD!”

Hood? Jason. Jason is the Hood. Jason is here. God I’m tired.

He doesn’t respond if he is here.

A figure elegantly sails through the air, tucking into an impossible swan dive only a skilled master of acrobatics whose trained his entire life could manage so effortlessly.

Plus that’s Nightwing’s ass. It doesn’t matter where you land on orientation, everyone in Gotham and Bludhaven knows that ass.

“HOOD!” Nightwing shouts, less cheery goofyball as per his usual self and more firm. More worried.

Red Robin looks now and his practiced, measured posture drops. He doesn’t even bother to hide his brother’s name.

“Jason. Jason stop! JASON!”

Nightwing has already broken into a full sprint towards where I assume Jason is but Red Robin take a second to make sure I’m comfortable. He places me against the wall and hands me a thick cloth to press over my shoulder. A second later and he’s off. My eyes follow and land on Jason.

Except he’s not Jason right now. He’s Red hood and the difference is….staggering to be honest.

I…forget who he is, the brand of justice he deals out with harsh sentences. Somehow, despite how we first met, I managed to split Jay and Hood into two different entities. Two different people who never happened to be in the same room at the same time.

But now, seeing Jason rain blow and blow upon my attacker, I see it.

Jason favors his right side. He’s amberidext-something but that’s from years of training. He says it feels more natural to him, easier for him to focus on other things.

Red likes using the right too. He’s just a fraction faster using his favored side and it’s clear even with his build that he is quick and there’s power in each punch.

Jason is light on his feet but has a solid stance. He loves to boast how it takes all his siblings to hold back him even if he’s not really trying to break free.

Nightwing can’t stop him neither can Red Robin. They’ve all had the same training from the same teacher but they’re not the same. They all have their strengths: Nightwing was blessed with an inhuman grace (and ass). RR is as smart as Batman and just as capable as a detective.

But Jason? Just a force of nature. Pure muscle and strength only equaled by his mentor and with a will to match.

They could barely slow the battle crazed Hood. It took all they had to pull him back but I could see by the sweat on their brows that it was only a matter of time before he broke free from their grasp. He was like a shark that smelled blood in the water and he wasn’t going to stop until he felt the price of injustice had been paid.

Another figure descended from the roof, smaller in stature and wearing an all too iconic yellow and black outfit: Robin. Well the newest Robin since everyone here minus me was Robin at some point.

You know when you’re drained of adrenaline you get reeeeeeally out of it.

Robin cautiously approached the trashing Red Hood, well aware of how dangerous his brother could be.

“Todd.” Robin spoke firmly “This is wrong. You know this is wrong.”

“Yeah Jay!” Nightwing pitched in quickly “And that’s coming from the kid. Imagine how you’re acting if he’s saying that.”

Robin openly glared “Watch your tongue Grayson.”

“Guys, could we deal with the rampaging Jason before we start snipping at each other?” Red Robin pleaded with immense strain.

Nightwing tightened his grip “Jay please. They’re watching.”

Jason’s shoulders slump as realization dawned on him. I could physically note when the exact moment the fight left him.

And me as I promptly passed out.

-----

I wish I could tell you after such a harrowing ordeal that I reflected with a deep and newly acquired profound understanding of my existence, the importance of living each day to the fullest and my place in the universe for really I am the instrument in which the universe….

Yeah no. I woke up on a cloud and instantly hated existing cuz pain is not fun.

I’m not exaggerating by the way. I found myself on the most comfortable bed I have ever been. It was like it was molded for me, shaping around my body in a way that didn’t aggravate my aches. I mean it didn’t stop them but I’ll take anything I could get.

“I see you are awake.”

I couldn’t even flail so I settled for screaming at the top of my lungs.

The most British older gentleman I have ever seen regarded me with a stony face of indifference though I swore I saw a twinkle of amusement in his eyes.

“I must admit I have never illicit that particular response before.” He said dryly complete with stiff upper lip “But I can see why it is Master Bruce’s favorite.”

I could feel my cheeks burn “Ah yes. Sorry I….sorry. Umm good morning mister…?”

The man gave a bow “Pennyworth. Normally I would ask you to refer to me as such but seeing as young Master Jason has spoken about you at great length and detail it seems only fair we are on a more familiar basis. Alfred is my name.”

I chuckled nervously as realization dawns on me “Yes. Please forgive me…Alfred? Sir? I…Long night.”

“I should say so what with that bullet lodged in your shoulder.”

I could feel my shoulder ache dully at the reminder.

“Ugh I gotta get to a hospital huh? Don’t want to get lead poisoning. Umm Alfred, sir, do you know if Gotham Blue covers gunshot wounds? My brain is still a bit scrambled.” I speak honestly.

Even his laugh is dry “Do not worry. I have taken the liberty of removing the round as you were sleeping. It made the process simpler and more efficient. A refreshing change of pace I will admit. My usual patients like to insist very serious gunshot wounds fall under the category of merely a ‘scratch’.”

I opened my mouth to reply but someone else answered for me “We’re bats Alfred. Comes with the territory that we get shot at.”

Jason sauntered into the room lazily but I knew he’d been worried: His hair was extra messy and matted, his shoulders slumped as his posture hunched over. His hands were stuffed into his pockets, probably fiddling with whatever he had inside. His gaze was intensely focused on Alfred but I could see him struggling not to look at me.

Alfred’s gave a slight smile “Ah yes. Forgive me Master Todd but I do recall there is quite the difference between being shot at and being shot in general. One many of you seem to have difficulty grasping.”

Jason shrugged, unsure what to say.

“Beg your pardon” Alfred turned to me “I must prepare breakfast. I shall be back shortly with some French toast and fresh bandages for your wound.”

With a polite bow Alfred briskly left the room and sent a scurrying of hurried feet racing from the door.

Silence, not awkward but still tense. The lingering sense of shame filled the air.

Jason wouldn’t look at me.

“Your siblings will be back soon.” I nudged him helpfully “If you want a private conversation I’d say we got like 5 minutes.”

“Twenty.” Jason mumbled uneasily “They really like to scatter to make sure no one is suspicious but Alfred and Bruce know us too well to fall for it. Alfred will suddenly find tiny and convenient issues around the house to prevent them from circling back and Bruce will track one or two down to have a quick chat.”

“Neat.” I said honestly.

Silence fell over us again but I knew it was because Jason was gathering his thoughts into words. When things really mattered he always took his time.

“I’m sorry.” He said, still refusing to meet my gaze.

I scoffed loudly “I wasn’t aware you shot me.”

“This isn’t the time for being a smartass!”

“It isn’t the time for being a dumbass either but here you are.”

“I know you saw me.”

I sighed deeply “Of course I saw you. What, do you think I never wanna see you again?”

Jason remained quiet.

“Look.” I tried to sit up “I’m not gonna pretend like I know what your life’s been like and what you did last night was…a lot.”

“Don’t move, you’ll make it worse.” He said but I ignored him.

“Make me Jay.”

Jason whirled around so quick I nearly didn’t see him gently push me onto back.

“Oww.” I wheezed but Jason held a firm yet careful hold on me “Cheater.”

“How? How did I cheat?” Jason gave a cutely offended look.

I snort “Alphabetically or chronologically?”

Jason glared “If you say Batman trained me one more time…”

“Am I lying?” I smirked “The most training I got was little league and I sucked at it.”

“You hit a homerun once” He offered helpfully.

I rolled my eyes playfully “I hit home, not a homerun. Big diff Jay.”

“True. Only you could hit the homebase and send it flying 5 feet.”

“Hey! It was 20 feet. Minimum.”

“Mhm sure. My bad.” Jason finally grinned “I suppose you also managed to get 5 points for doing that too.”

“Don’t forget the scholarship too! You always forget the scholarship.”

“Do not!”

“Do too!”

“No!”

“Duh!”

We stared at each other deeply for a moment before breaking out into laughter.

Well Jason did. I took one breath and suddenly I was violently coughing.

“Oww oww oww.”

“Idiot.” He mumbled as he tucked me into the sheets.

I gave a cheesy grin “Worth it.”

Jason raised a quizzical eyebrow.

“Okay no, not really” I admitted “That hurt way more than I was expecting.”

“Rest.” Jason threatened me with arms crossed.

I was too tired to care the words “Only if you’re here to keep an eye on me.” Tumbled out of my mouth before I thought better.

Jason shifted guiltily “Look I…”

In for a pound. I gently placed on my hand over his “We’ll talk about it later. For now it’s over and honestly I really don’t wanna think about it this second. I am just….really happy to see you Jay.”

He took my hand in his.

“You really need to stop taking shortcuts.” He scolded lightly.

“Hey!” I raised my free hand defensively “There were lights! What kind of idiot tries to rob someone in a well lit alley?!”

“The one that shot you yesterday.”

“No shit Jay.” I glared openly at him but all he did was smirk in response.

As beautiful as this moment was, I had to ruin it. A thought began to bother me and Jason noticed.

Jason motioned with his head “Don’t think too hard. Your body can’t handle the strain right now.”

“Oh shut it. You said Bruce was gonna intercept your siblings, right?”

“Umm yeah.” Jason was unsure where I was going with this “He pretends to be emotionally constipated but he’s very good at bed side manner and respectful with privacy.”

I nodded in agreement “Have you ever brought anyone to here?”

Jason’s face fell “Oh no.”

“Emotionally constipated? You’re being unusually kind today Jason.”

The doors flung open and in strode the one, the only, the myth, the legend and Jay’s father: Bruceman.

Shit I mean Batwayne. Brucebat.

Bruce motherfreaking Wayne gave me a million dollar smile “Hello I’m Bruce Wayne. It is so nice to meet you. Jason never brings any of his friends over.”

I could feel myself pale as I stared dumbfounded at his outstretched hand.

Then I promptly passed out.