#but why is it always them... they are so lovely and so well-written i just can't believe they get so much hate??

[hellodropbear]

like she used to

alexia putellas x sister

i have been writing this for ages and it has just sat in my documents folder since january. i don't usually post stuff i write so this will probably get taken down at some point. i've written 13k words so far but this is just the first 4k.

~~~~~~

I hadn't expected to get the call up, not at all really. But Mapi tore her meniscus and apparently the first team found themselves in need of a backup centre back and I was the best option from the B team. It's a compliment, really. Mami is very proud of me and she is excited for me and my sister to play together in a few weeks, even though she is still recovering from her surgery and I will probably not make it off the bench. I am only 15 and 10 months, usually they wait until you are at least 16 and a bit before you can play. 

But, I don't really know how to feel. Thankfully Alexia won't be in training with me for now and I try to avoid thinking about what will happen when she eventually gets better and I have to face her again.

Alexia is my older sister by a lot. There's a 14 year age gap between us and I used to completely and utterly idolise her. She and Alba were two superheroes, always by my side when I needed them. I put them on a pedestal like they were the greatest human beings to ever walk the planet. To me back then, they were. 

I was only four when my father died. All I remember from that time was the big black invisible sheet that hung outside his study and the dark and scary emotions that swallowed our house whole. Alba and Alexia would argue about who got to cuddle me at night and I was so unaware what was happening that I would happily agree, wiping away their tears when it all got too much. 

The death of our father made our family unit stronger. Mami, Ale, Alba and Elena - it was all any of us needed and we supported each other in whatever ways we could. 

Mami had to pick up more shifts at her job, so she couldn't pick me up from school. Alexia had just got her license so she would come in a break during training and pick me up in her training gear. 

Alexia didn't have time to drop me off at home so I would sit and watch the training with whoever wanted to give me company when they were injured. 

Most days, Alba would come and pick me up and take me on the bus all the way home. She would play cartoons on the TV as she sat at the table and did school work. Some days, when she had the time she would sit with me and watch Alexia's training and we'd all go home together. Alba used to say she enjoyed the training. Looking back, I think she just wanted a free ride home and an excuse to not do her homework. 

As I grew up, everything just worked. Alexia and Alba were still living at home as a support to Mami and everything was perfect. My sisters were my idols, my Mami was my shining star. She still is. She would do anything for her daughters, as long as it meant we were all happy. 

That is why it has been so hard for her over the past two years. 

I have not been happy, not really. My football has been thriving, I have represented my country in the under 17 age group and I am a consistent starter idol the Barcelona B team. I spent two years in La Masia before they sent me to the B team last year and I have only been improving since. Everything is going well. Mami says I have had a better start to my career than Alexia did. 

Maybe that is why Alexia hates me. Maybe Mami is just saying that to make me feel better about it.

Alexia and I, despite the 14 year age gap, were always inseparable - for the first 12 years of my life. She was at every single school event, football game, she picked me up from trainings when she could and would train me herself in the garden. We shared a common passion that Alba was not interested in at all - we both love football, we eat, sleep and breath it. Football is everything. She was the one who gave me that mentality. 

"Football is life, Lena, you are lucky you are so good because now you also get to live football and hermanita, it is the most incredible thing." 

She had whispered that to me when I was 11. We were sat on the beach, a place we visited frequently throughout my childhood, both of us staring out at the reflection of the moon on the sea. Alba was fast asleep, her head in Alexia's lap as she snored lightly, completely oblivious to our conversation. 

It all fell apart over three years ago, although I don't have the first clue as to why. 

It was not an explicit event that ruined everything, more my older sister growing up and flying the nest that was so secure and established over years and years of shared success, happiness, failure and grief. She moved out of home long before that, but her split with Jenni upset her, I think, a great deal. I wouldn't know because she didn't really tell me anything - that was strictly Alba's business. 

I didn't even know they had broken up until 5 months after it actually happened. 

"Mami, why does Jenni never come over any more?" 

It was an innocent and normal question, but the look on my mother's face told me everything. Everything about Jenni and everything about my sister. 

I think that was the first knock. She hadn't done anything wrong but I had loved Jenni and Jenni had loved me. I would have thought that she would have told me they broke up. Maybe she didn't want to, maybe she just forgot. She does a lot of that these days. 

Before she and Jenni broke up, she still came to all of my games. She never missed one game before I transferred to La Masia and would insist on taking me out to ice cream after every one. She would tease me for not scoring like she does, even though I play as a centre back. 

"You need some training from Mapi, she is a centre back and has the most lethal free kick, hermanita! She is the best defender I have played with, but don't tell her I said that. I think you will grow up to be better than her." 

She was excited that day, I had made a few good saves and I think that was the first time she really saw that I had the potential to be great. 

I remember the first game she was late to. I noticed immediately but we both pretended she was on time - she only made it to the last 10 minutes but I put it down as traffic or being caught up at training. She was busy, it takes a lot to be La Reina. 

I remember the first game she missed entirely. She wasn't there at the beginning and she wasn't there at the end. I was 13 and I didn't have a phone yet so I couldn't call Mami and ask her to come pick me up because Alexia was too busy. I told myself it was because she was too busy. I didn't want to say she had forgotten because that was too hard for me to handle. 

I remember vividly sitting outside the stadium as the sun set. My coach had asked where my sister was, I was a bit stuck with what to say but I managed to convince her I was fine and she could go home. 

Alba came and picked me up after work that night. It was dark and she looked sad but when I asked if she was ok, she just shrugged her shoulders and said everything would be fine. 

I found out from Mami a few weeks later that Alba was sad because I had never once been forgotten anywhere. Alba saw that as the destruction of our strong family. I suppose she was not wrong. 

Alexia never said anything about that game but she was at the next. She didn't take me out for ice cream after, instead patting my head and telling me she would drop me off at Mami's work. 

"I have things to do, Elena, I am very busy. Hopefully soon Mami will let you catch the bus on your own. Maybe Alba can take you soon so you know the correct routes." 

Her words hurt more than I could admit to myself, I told myself to stop being pathetic. Mami asked why I was crying when I walked into her office. I told her I had played terribly and she comforted me. I think she knew I was lying. I think that is why she had tears in her eyes when she released me from her grip-like hold.

Since that day, Alexia has been to 3 of my games. She went to one more of my old club games but she was sat beside Alba, her eyes glued to her phone the entire match. I was so unfocused that the ball deflected off my face and we conceded. I was taken off with a bleeding nose but when I looked up in the stands, my sister was still staring at her phone. Alba had run down the stairs and was by my side when I entered the little sick bay. 

I cried then too. Most people thought it was because of the bleeding nose or the conceded goal. Alba knew that wasn't the real reason. 

The penultimate game she watched was the final of the under 15s Catalonia cup. I don't know what she did during the game because Mami told me not to look up. She said she didn't want me to get distracted but I think she meant to say she didn't want me to get hurt. 

I think I still idolised Alexia at that point in time. She was still my older sister and she was still the best player in the world. She still had weekly dinners at home, although she wouldn't sit next to me and sneakily take all the food I didn't want off my plate anymore. She stopped staying to watch a movie after dinner even though my favourite part of the week was falling asleep in her lap as her hands combed softly through my hair. 

I remember when I was accepted into La Masia, Mami held a nice big dinner. It was right in the middle of covid so it was technically illegal, but we had a lot of my family over. Mami invited a few of the Barcelona girls as well and Mapi and Leila reminded me of what it used to be like before Alexia stopped loving me. 

The reminder of the before was more painful than I liked to admit, and the night ended when the tears that had been burning in the back of my eyes finally spilled out as I was talking to Mapi. 

She immediately pulled me into her arms and asked what was wrong and I struggled to find a lie that would be believable. 

I settled on saying I was upset about everything changing - which I suppose was true. 

I remember Alexia looking mortified and breaking eye contact as soon as I looked at her. She told me off that evening when Mami was in the shower and Alba was talking to someone else. She told me I needed to be grateful for everything I have been given and that she paved the way for me. 

It was even worse when she said I would never achieve the things she has. She said it was because I didn't have the mentality that she did, that I had it all so easy. 

It hurt the most when she told me she was disappointed in the person I was. 

"I hope we never share a shirt, Elena, because the day you play in the first Barcelona team is the day that we have run out of players. It will mean that football players are week and female footballers can not be weak. You do not have it in you to be like me, to do what I have done to get to where I am."

The venom in her voice sent a cold shiver down my spine and I felt like I had been stabbed. I didn't cry that time. I waited until I was in my bedroom to sob my heart out. 

The last time she ever watched me play was the next day, but she didn't have an option not to. I played terribly, my first game as a La Masia student, my sisters words repeating over and over in my head. 

That was really what tipped the relationship I once shared with Alexia on its head. The pedestal I had put her on was destroyed and suddenly she was just another player. I barely saw her as my sister any more. She couldn't love me, you wouldn't be able to hurt someone you love so much. 

I have barely seen her since. She still comes to our family dinners on Thursday nights - she still very much loves Alba and our Mami. But I tell Mami that I have training with Barcelona B late on Thursdays. It finishes at 6 and dinner starts at 7, but I just organise to go to my friends' houses for dinner instead. 

Sometimes we both have dinner together at home, but it is awkward and I hate it. I think she has probably forgotten about what she said to me in June of 2021, but I don't think I will ever be able to. 

She doesn't like me, but it's ok because I have learnt to accept that. But I will never not love my sister because she was once everything to me. 

~~~~~~

"Pequena Putellas!" Patri's excited shriek is what welcomes me into the dressing room on my first day. She tackles me into a hug and squeezes me tight. "It has been such a long time, mi favorita!" 

The last time I saw Patri was only last year at the champions league final. I had sat with my whole family but I went to the bathroom when everyone else went and spoke to the players. I don't think Patri would have seen me. 

I can only smile as she continues. 

"I remember you as the little 8 year old who would sit and watch our training sessions after school! I was so confused by you when I first arrived here, you know. I remember the first time Ale let you play a game with us and you were so good!" 

"Nobody doubted that you would be on this team one day!" A new voice entered the conversation.

"Marta!" I hugged the brunette closely. She was always one of my favourites. 

"I am proud of you, pequena putellas." 

Her words are familiar as I have heard them out of my mothers voice time and time again my whole life. But they seem foreign coming from Marta and it is an unwanted reminder of my sister. I don't know why - maybe it is because I have always associated this Barcelona team with her. I don't remember the last time she said she was proud of me. 

I don't remember the last time she said anything to me, really. 

"Gracias, Marta, I have missed you." I bury my head into her neck and she holds me closer. 

"You have not been around as much since you transferred to La Masia. I wanted to come and watch but Ale never extended an invitation and I didn't want to overstep." I shake my heads at her words and she frowns. 

"Alexia doesn't have time for my games, she hasn't for a while. It takes a lot to be La Reina." 

Marta's frown deepens at my words and the attention of a few spanish players is captured. I should have spoken quieter, I forgot how many people in here speak catalan. 

"It is ok, she is very supportive, but she just can't come to my games. She makes it up in other ways." I am lying through my teeth but Marta will never know. 

"I am sure, she must be very proud of you, being selected in this team for the first time, it is a big deal, you are very young."

All I can do is nod, my energy is all being put into holding back my own tears. I don't know if Mami told her. I don't know if Alexia even knows that I was selected. 

"Get changed now, I am sure Jona will want to talk to you before the session, especially with the game tomorrow."

I nod again as Marta pats me on the back and walk over to the cubby that says my name. It feels a bit surreal, really. 

I never really thought I would see my name on a Barcelona cubby, accompanied by my new number that I chose in the meeting a few days ago. It was always a dream, but I never thought it was achievable. Alexia always seemed like a superstar, a superhuman of sorts and I would never reach that kind of level. 

But here I am in the team that I always wanted to be in - in no way am I anywhere near my sisters level but I am on my way to being like her. I just wish she cared. I wish she was proud of me like Marta is. 

Her cubby sits across from me and I try to tear my eyes from it but it sits and stares right back at me. I feel like an intruder in Alexia's space, this is not for me, she would not want me to be here. 

I tie my laces quickly after that and head out onto the pitches to begin training. 

I have trained with the first team twice before, but the Barcelona Bs were always slightly seperate and we could keep our distance from the first players. Jonatan is a familiar face and I feel comfortable as he smiles and me and motions for me to follow the others to the gym. 

It is weird, being promoted within my own club. I am not so much a new signing, but a replacement - I am not good enough to be in the first team but they had no other options when Mapi injured herself. 

I used to worry that people would say I only get opportunities because my last name is Putellas. When my sister told me I was weak all those years ago, that idea sort of cemented in my head, I suppose. 

I never told my Mami what her daughter said to me because it would upset her. I told Alba half of it when she found me crying in my room a few days later but made her promise to not tell anyone. She couldn't say anything to Mami, Alexia, anyone at all because it would only make Alexia think I was weaker. 

She was furious and tried to tell me it was untrue but it had already been said. I believed Alexia's word more than anyone else. To me, she was a superhuman. 

But when I spoke to Jonatan a few days ago he made me feel like I was wanted within this squad. He made it clear that he wants me to integrate completely into the squad in the next few years and that he can see me playing soon even though I am only 15. 

I told him I didn't want anything special because of my surname. 

He told me that he chose me because of my first name. 

"Elena Putellas,"  he said with a grin, "you may be as good as her, but you are not your sister. This is a professional environment. As long as you perform, which I know you will, nobody will care what your name is."

It was a big boost to my confidence. 

Aitana Bonmati caught up to me quickly as I walked to the gym. 

"You are big now." I chuckled but did not look over, I didn't need to really. "But not that big. You are only 15, si?"

"Yes, I am 15." 

I met Aitana when she first joined the club. She always used to say that she would steal me and take me home with her because she thought I was adorable. It is strange that I am now sort of in the same team as her. 

She started playing for the first team when I was 8. I was older then, I played my own football and liked staying with Alexia so I could kick a ball around with her teammates when they were done. 

Aitana was one of the few who would stay every time I was there. When Alexia didn't want to wait she would drive me home herself, all the way to the other side of Barcelona. We would always stop for ice cream on the way home. 

"I have not seen you in too long, Lena. I have missed you a lot but you have been doing very well in the B team. I am very proud and I take credit for your abilities." She spoke in such a dead pan voice but it was somehow still filled with emotion. 

"I have missed you too, ABC." It was a nickname I gave her the first time she drove me home. I had been learning about the alphabet in English class and had the little song stuck in my head when she told me her full name. I used to sing her initials in the tune of the song but it quickly merged to me just saying the three letters. 

"I have been to a few of your games, you know?" 

I look at her in confusion, I have never seen her there. She just nods. 

"Alexia never invited any of us but she was never at the ones I went to so I would sit in the stands with a hat and glasses so people wouldn't recognise me, but I was there. I went to your La Masia games as well. You have become a phenomenal player, Lena."

She has always spoken with such sincerity. I have missed her a lot. 

"Maybe you can drop me off at home again tonight? I have missed you."

She chuckles and pulls me into a side hug. 

"I was waiting for you to ask, little Lena. Oh you are not so little any more!"

I chuckle as well and let my head fall onto her shoulder as we enter the gym. My eyes scan the room, looking at all of the players on their equipment, nerves quickly settling inside me. 

"Don't worry, it's all easy." Aitana seems to read my mind. "Just come with me and I will show you how to do everything. It will become second nature in the next few days."

The gym session went quickly as I was taught all the different exercises. I was familiar with most of them, having done a very similar program in the past with the B team. 

We went out onto the field to do some drills and I played well. Jonatan was impressed and so were the first players. My teammates? Maybe, not quite, I don't think. I still haven't been in a team list, so I suppose I'll be their teammate when that eventually happens. 

It wasn't until we reached the ice cream shop that Aitana started asking me all the awkward questions. I should have seen it coming. 

"Why do you never come to our games anymore, Lena?" I was very grateful for the scoops of gelato in my hands. Eating it delayed my response as I tried to come up with something to say. I shrug as I eat.

I can not say it is because I do not get along with Alexia. It is too hard for me to say now, even after all these years. 

"I'm not sure. I suppose I got busy with my own training and school. I have been to a few but I usually go home with Alba pretty quickly after they finish." It is only half a lie but she just shrugs, apparently not believing my words. 

"And why is it that I am driving you home from your first ever first team training? I thought Alexia would have wanted to." I anticipated a question like this but that does not mean I wanted her to actually ask it. 

"Alexia is busy." I hope that Aitana understands I don't want to talk about it. I haven't spoken about my broken relationship with my sister to anyone. I think she can sense something is wrong though, because she puts her spoon back into her ice cream and grabs my arm so I am staring right at her. 

"If you ever want to talk, I am right here, Lena. I know you don't like people knowing what is going on inside that crazy head of yours but it is good to release your feelings." 

She definitely knows something is wrong so I appreciate her not pushing. 

"I have outlets, I play football, I play the piano, I am ok, aitana, I really am." 

She eyed me as if to say she didn't believe me but dropped the topic anyway. 

"When did you get so good?"

chapter II

[puck-luck]

give him six | trevor zegras

warnings: extreme domination. EXTREME domination. daddy kink because i do what i want. edging. spanking. cockwarming. at the same time. don’t worry about it. i do what i want. HINTS of anal play but they don’t actually do it. derogatory language (name calling…). crying during sex. sorry! spit kink. had to be done. subspace! ugh need a man to put me in that BAD bad pairing: trevor zegras x fem!reader summary/request: “thinking about trevor zegras needing to fuck his gf roughly after a tough game to let out his frustration bc i can sooooo see him being into that. but he’d always be looking out for u too, saying to tell him if it hurts and checking in to ask if she’s ok, but as soon as she assures him she is he’s just going absolutely nuts not holding back 🫠” wc: 4109

You don’t have to look at Trevor to see how angry he is. He lost a few weeks of hockey due to his broken ankle and now he was back– but he couldn’t make a fucking goal in a shootout to get the win for his team? The worst part was that his shot was denied not by the goalie, but by the post. By the fucking post. 

Trevor loves to flaunt his accuracy in the backyard, in the practice rink, even when tossing trash into the garbage bin, but the one time he doesn’t mean to hit the post, the puck does? It’s idiocracy. It’s humiliating. He’s better than this. He knows it, you know it, the whole world knows it. But St. Louis got to celebrate tonight, and maybe if he hadn’t hit the damn post, then he’d be celebrating with his teammates instead of stewing in your bed. 

His arms are crossed over his chest and the TV isn’t even on– you join him and want to laugh at the image of your pouty boyfriend wallowing in silence. You climb under the covers with Trevor. 

“You did really well, Trev,” you compliment, settling into the mattress.

“We should’ve won,” he replies.

You sigh. “You can’t win them all.”

Trevor scoffs. “Yeah, well, we could’ve won this one,” he snaps.

You stare at him for a moment while his tone really sets in. “You don’t have to talk to me like that,” you say, your voice growing cold. “I wasn’t out on the ice with you.”

“I know, I’m sorry.” He, at least, sounds the part. He covers his face with his hands, the heels of his palms pressed against his eyes. “I just– I’m so mad.”

You take a deep breath. You don’t have to be at work until 9 and it’s about five minutes away if you leave on time. You have to do the laundry tomorrow afternoon anyway. Trevor would feel better if you did this. You really wanted to sleep after the game tonight, but it would be a lie if you said you didn’t want to make him feel better. Another deep breath.

“Why don’t you take it out on me?” You ask.

Trevor looks over at you, surprise written all over his features. “Really?” He asks, like a child who was just told that he could have another candy before bed. “Like last time?”

Last time. You practically start salivating, thinking about how Trevor brought you to the edge and ripped you away from the cliff time after time, until you were sobbing and screaming and begging for a release. 

“Yeah, like last time,” you agree, already a little absent. Trevor notices, of course he does, he’s more in tune with your body than you are at this rate.

A smile tugs on the corner of Trevor’s lips, but he ignores it.

“Hands and knees,” Trevor says. “Right in front of me.”

You position yourself accordingly.

Trevor smooths a hand over your behind, your shirt riding up and exposing your skin due to the position you’re in. You hadn’t worn anything else to bed– why would you? You and Trevor had been together for ages and you weren’t exactly new to his… post-loss coping mechanisms. 

“Elbows,” Trevor corrects. His cock twitches when you immediately drop to your elbows, no hesitation in your movements. You’re silent, like he wants when you play like this, and you’ll do anything he says. You’re gorgeous like this, all spread out and listening to him with your head forward like a good girl, waiting for your next instruction.

You hear his voice over the thumping of your heart, although you’re not sure how. You’re always finding Trevor in the mess of everything. 

“Bite the sheets,” Trevor commands, shimmying out of his boxers. You can hear him moving and you take the bedsheets in your mouth, the fabric almost immediately saturating with your saliva. “Close your eyes.” You slide your eyes shut and wait, your shaky breath filling the room and heating your face.

Something warm probes at your entrance and for a moment, you can’t tell if it’s Trevor’s fingers or his cock. The answer comes to you via a sharp spank on your left cheek, with Trevor’s left hand. He always fingers you with his left hand so that he can keep his right around your neck– the hand that’s currently kneading your other cheek. 

He pushes his cock into you slowly, the movement more like he’s pulling you back than pushing you forward. 

“Six shots,” Trevor muses, watching his cock disappear into you. “Six shots, and I didn’t make one.”

You bite back the reassurance, swallowing it. Trevor doesn’t want to hear it.

“Do you know how that feels?”

You don’t answer. He still doesn’t want to hear it.

“I’ll show you,” Trevor promises, his voice deceptively soft. His hand rests against your skin, heavy and present. 

You get lost in the feeling easily, your mouth full of the comforter and your fingers twisted in the top sheet. Your eyes stay closed, the red-tinged darkness grounding you. 

“Yeah, I’ll show you,” he repeats, his voice darker this time. “You’re going to understand exactly what it feels like to come so close six times, just for all of that to be taken away from you.”

Your eyes open at his words and you pale. You spit the covers out and break your silence. “Six times?” You ask, incredulous. “Trev.”

“Daddy,” Trevor corrects with a spank. “Unless that’s… not what we’re doing tonight?”

You clench down on his length at the contact and the name, your eyes rolling into the back of your head at the sound of his voice. Trevor is playing with you, teasing you. His fingers are walking all over you�� the small of your back, your cheeks, down your crack all the way to where he’s buried inside of you… and it’s distracting.

You find yourself nodding. “It is.”

“Good,” Trevor says. “Don’t worry, baby. I’ll make the second and third ones quick, okay?”

His voice is full of condescension, like he knows you’re going to lose track of everything as soon as he starts hitting you. He’s right, but that’s neither here nor there.

For as long as you’d been dating Trevor, you’d never seen him tap into the mindset that he has on the ice off the ice. However, when he’s bringing his hand down on your ass, he gets pretty damn close.

His spanks are precise and powerful. He’s leaving pink handprints all over your skin, from the fleshy parts of your ass to the top of your thighs, even a few falls over the hole that he’s not occupying. Each flash of his hand leaves your skin burning and your hips inching upwards, begging for more. All of this, and he’s still inside you– the torture of the spanking is that he isn’t moving, and you’re not supposed to.

You lose track of the count, feeling your stomach flip with each slap. What starts as stinging pain turns into aching pleasure, and the sensations aren’t lost on Trevor.

He feels you jolt each time he brings his hand down on your skin, the clench of your pussy around his cock, the pounding of your pulse from inside of you. Trevor smirks and shifts his hips forward as he brings his hand down, his hand making contact with your asshole just as his tip nudges against your g-spot.

You wail, lurching under Trevor’s watchful eye. You fuck back on his cock once, only managing the movement one measly time, before Trevor stills you with a hand and slides out of you.

“No,” you breathe out, voice muffled by your makeshift gag. 

“Yes,” Trevor replies, smug. “Isn’t it frustrating?”

You glare at him, turning so he can see the look on your face.

All it does is make him laugh. “Well, now I have to really punish you, don’t I?” He asks. “I can’t have my baby making angry faces at me.”

Trevor taps your hip, wordlessly telling you to move. You resume your original position next to him, expecting Trevor to tell you to put your “pretty little hand” on his cock and jerk him until he comes all over your freshly manicured fingers. 

You don’t expect him to slide under the covers and hike up your shirt until your breasts are exposed. Trevor hooks a leg around yours, his mouth exhaling warm air onto your nipple. His fingers tap at your skin, one hand on your side and the other on your mound, making its way south. 

“We’re going to do four like this,” Trevor tells you. His voice is merely a whisper, crawling over in your skin and raising goosebumps in its wake. “Just like this. I’m gonna take one,” he breathes, catching your nipple between his teeth for a split second before continuing. “Right here. Gimme one, baby, just from me licking your tits. I know you can.”

He dives in, tongue first. Your jaw drops as Trevor’s eyes close, the same way you know they do when you kiss him. It’s surreal, seeing him kiss and lick over your skin the way he normally does over your lips. His eyelashes flutter, the long, dark pieces of hair stealing your train of thought. 

Trevor surprises you with how quickly he brings you to the edge again. He promised that the second and third would be quick, but you didn’t know just how quick he meant.

You let out a strangled gasp and your hand flies to Trevor’s hair when he opens his eyes and lets his adoring gaze fix on your face. You pull him off your chest, heaving breaths filling your lungs. 

Trevor smirks, but it never quite reaches his eyes. The same look burns you, makes you shy under his gaze. You blush and look away, one of your hands covering the redness on your cheeks.

“Good,” Trevor remarks, a mere observation. “You got close, didn’t you, baby?”

You nod, still breathing heavily.

Trevor waits, expectant. He tilts his head down and blinks.

“Yes, Daddy,” you concede. “I was close.”

“Honest girl,” Trevor praises. His fingers dance over your slit. “Love you.”

“Love you,” you parrot back to him. 

Trevor rewards you by pushing one finger into your heat, pumping it in and out of you at an agonizingly slow pace. 

Your breath stays shaky, your eyes never leaving Trevor’s. His finger drags along your walls, petting the inside of you with its pad, and you swear you can feel the ridges of his fingerprint inside of you if you focus enough. 

It’s hard to focus on that when Trevor’s got his scrutinizing eyes on yours, though.

“What finger is it?” Trevor asks.

“What?” You stammer, finally blinking and breaking the trance. 

Trevor’s other hand flies up to steady your chin before you can look down and ruin his game. “Which finger–” Trevor asks, curling it inside you. “–am I fucking you with?”

Your brain stalls. It’s a no-brainer, really, you should know each of Trevor’s fingers by feel alone with how often they make their way inside of you. However, you’ve been denied two orgasms already and Trevor is close to taking a third from you with just his smug stare.

“Come on,” Trevor goads. “You know which finger this is, baby. The faster you tell me, the faster I get you to your orgasm.”

“Yeah, the faster you take it away,” you reply. 

Trevor’s eyes cloud over and he jams his finger inside you, increasing his pace. “Don’t be a bitch.”

You open your mouth to retort, but Trevor twists his finger inside of you.

“Unless you want me to fuck you like one,” he teases. 

You clench down on Trevor’s finger, his middle finger you realize, when he utters those words.

“You like that?” Trevor asks, unnecessarily. He can feel how you feel about it. “You like the idea of me getting my cock in you and fucking you like a damn animal? What is it, baby? Is it the primal instinct of it all or just the fact that I’m disciplining you like you’re worth less than I am?”

You moan at his words, logical responses and formed sentences too far from you to grasp.

“Tell me.” Trevor nudges your g-spot and you arch your back, your hips grinding against his finger… just for him to draw it out of you. “Not so fast. We’ve still got three more to go.”

“I was close,” you complain.

“So was I,” Trevor counters. “Hurts, doesn’t it? When things don’t work out the way you want them to?” 

“Trevor!” You frown, put off by his game.

“Well, now you’ve really done it,” Trevor growls, shoving two fingers inside of you and resting his thumb on your clit. “You know better than to call me by my name.”

You’re drenched in sweat and slick, so Trevor’s movements aren’t hindered in the slightest, not even when you squeeze your thighs shut. All Trevor does is push them open, trap your thigh under his bony knee. Somehow, even though you just had your legs spread, Trevor seems to push in further and rub your clit faster, hitting every right spot in alternating movements: clit, then g-spot, clit, then g-spot again. And over and over.

You don’t warn him this time, you don’t pull away. You try not to clench down, you try not to rock your hips, you try anything that might get you real relief from a real orgasm without Trevor noticing.

But it’s also a futile effort because your boyfriend knows you that well.

He withdraws his fingers just as your legs, the traitors, begin to tremble.

“Oh, baby, you didn’t think you’d get away with that, did you?” Trevor teases.

“Please,” you beg. “Please, Daddy.”

Trevor’s eyes flash with approval and he teases your entrance again, this time with a third finger. “Don’t worry,” he coos. “We’ve only got two more. Then I’ll let you come.”

You choke on your own spit when Trevor buries his three fingers inside of you, all in one motion. He doesn’t dawdle or stall for time. He doesn’t take advantage of the situation at hand– that you were already shaking for him and a pump of his fingers would give you away to the pleasure just on the other side of your approaching peak.

No, he doesn’t pump his fingers. He just wiggles them as deep as he can get them and smirks before dropping a kiss on your lips. He lowers himself then and blows cool air on your clit, spreading your folds with his other hand so the full bundle of nerves is revealed to him. He leans in and captures it with his tongue, lightly sucking on the bundle. It’s not the most friction he’s ever given you, but it’s consistent. He builds you up on his tongue, slowly, so slowly. 

And when your thighs close around his head, he stops. You’re aching for a release, tears building along your waterline. Your refractory period is shrinking with each near-orgasm, your babbles begging for Trevor to do something.

“I need it,” you beg, but the words feel more like a scream with how heavy they sit on your chest. 

“Oh, I know you need it,” Trevor replies, tone mocking. “You need it so bad, you’re acting up. Talking back, not using my name, not answering my questions, trying to trick me so that you can get an orgasm. I ought to leave you like this, really show you what it’s like to be left frustrated after a disappointing performance.”

“No,” you whimper. “No, Trevor, that’s too much.”

It’s not your word, it’s not a cry of pain, but it still gives Trevor pause. 

“Need me to be sweet to you?” Trevor asks, his eyes genuine and his hair wild from your wandering grasp.

You whine, arching your back. Trevor smiles fondly, but bats you away. When your back makes contact with the mattress again, Trevor’s deft fingers pinch your nipple and cause you to arch up a second time. He pushes you back down.

“Slut,” Trevor chastises. “Think you can distract me with your tits? This isn’t amateur hour, baby. I’ve still got to steal one orgasm from you.”

You blanch at that, your eyes wide. You take in every detail of his face, panting. There isn’t anything you could say that could stop him, except your word, but you’d rather curl into a ball and die than stop this right now. The words don’t come to you to tell him to continue, though.

“I’m going to get you so close,” Trevor whispers, his face close to yours. He leans down and kisses your neck. You arch into him, your once-useless hands finding his sides. You feel over the muscle there, his lean waist and strong chest. “You’re going to be right there, baby, and then I’m going to take it all away.”

“Please,” you repeat, but it’s indecipherable whether you’re begging Trevor to let you come or begging Trevor to leave you wanting more.

“Yeah,” Trevor agrees, sliding his three fingers back into your wet cunt. 

You moan sharply at the intrusion, pumping deep into you this time and dragging along your walls in a torturous way. It feels so good, it has you seeing white specks when you manage to open your eyes and look at Trevor. His eyes are trained on your cunt, watching your wetness seep all over his fingers. When you push his hair out of his face, his eyes lift to meet yours. 

His pupils are blown wide with lust and he’s got a snarl rumbling from deep in his chest. It is primal, you realize, the way he’s bullying his fingers into your cunt without a thought about what you can or can’t handle. He’s taking you, the way that you’ll only ever allow him to do.

“Gonna come?” Trevor asks, the evil smirk overtaking his face again.

“Please,” you beg again.

“‘Please,’” Trevor mocks. “Is that the only word you know?”

He pulses his hand, his fingers bouncing off your walls and causing you to jolt and scramble to find something to hold onto. That something ends up being Trevor’s hair and the pillow to your side. Your chest is heaving again, your nipples taut and pointed and begging to be touched. 

As Trevor’s eyes trail down your body at a snail’s pace, you can feel your orgasm approaching. You yank his hair and he winces, bringing his hand to your neck and squeezing in retaliation.

“Daddy,” you wheeze, the edge of your vision growing fuzzy and dark. It’s the only warning you can give Trevor as the cliff starts to crumble below you, as you start to fall away into the orgasm that was denied from you for so long.

And when Trevor pulls his fingers out of you, he yanks you back onto solid ground.

And, unsurprisingly, you start to cry.

It’s not pretty, either. It’s not a tear here and there when you’re deepthroating your boyfriend, or the beautiful running of mascara as he fucks your face at some hockey event. No, this is full-on sobbing, gut-wrenching cries that have Trevor taking inventory of all the things he did to you, wondering if he pushed you too far. He rubs your thighs with both of his hands in a soothing motion, ignoring the glistening precum that he’s inadvertently rubbing into your skin. 

“Baby,” Trevor murmurs. 

You sob and raise your arms, needing him to hold you. Trevor’s face softens immediately and he pulls you into his chest, turning so he’s sitting with his back against the headboard and you’re awkwardly dangling half on his lap, half off. You keen into his neck, burying your face in his soft, tan skin.

“My girl,” Trevor whispers, rubbing your arms now and pulling you closer to him, comforting you with his warmth. “You’re perfect.”

“Daddy,” you whisper into his neck. “Please.”

Trevor tilts your head back and looks into your eyes. His gaze looks sad, meeting your own, red and puffy. “Please what, baby?”

“I need your cock,” You plead, petting over his stomach with a hand that feels like its made of static. “I need you to make me come, Daddy.”

Trevor groans, sounding pained. He twitches beneath you. “Like this?” He asks.

You nod, losing your words again. It’s a timid but vehement nod, needing Trevor to press inside you more than anything, but not knowing if you could handle another ruined orgasm.

“Please, let me come this time,” you say, trying to look as pathetic and needy as you can. With big doe eyes like this, Trevor has always been bad at denying you the things you want. 

“Yeah, I think I’ve tortured you enough,” Trevor agrees, reaching under you and pressing his cockhead against your entrance. “Give me a bounce, baby. Wanna see your tits jump in front of my face, yeah?”

Trevor snakes his hands around to grab your bottom, his fingers tight against the skin. He uses his leverage to bounce you for him, knowing that you don’t have control over your movements as fucked out as you are, and he’d hate to see you cry more because you’re mad at yourself for not moving the way he wanted you to.

He lifts you up and down, snapping his hips up to meet yours when they fall. His eyes flicker between your boobs and your face, the teartracks drying over your cheeks as you allow yourself to be consumed by ecstasy. One of Trevor’s hands flies upward, tracing over your skin until he threads it between the strands of your hair. Once his whole hand is enveloped in your roots, he tugs and your mouth falls open.

Trevor leans forward and directs a glob of spit down your throat, his forceful hawk causing his spit to find the back of your throat. 

You convulse on top of him, trembling under his watchful gaze and his warm cock. “Daddy,” you pant, feeling like you’re burning and drowning in your desire for him. Trevor slips his thumb into your mouth as you come and you suck on it like a child, grinding against him through your aftershocks.

You’re floating on air by the time your aftershocks cease and Trevor pulls out of you gently, grasping his cock in his fist. He’s watching you and you’re watching him. Never breaking eye contact, you open your mouth and stick your tongue out.

Trevor presses his tip to your tongue and strokes his cock, squeezing on the downstroke and groaning curses with each turn of his hand. He comes just seconds later, his white ropes of come gracing your tastebuds. He pulls away after only a few drops intersect with your tongue, continuing to come in spurts over your cheeks, lips, and nose. A bit of come drips down the tip of your nose and you poke your tongue out again to try and catch it, which makes Trevor laugh.

Still lost in your post-orgasm haze, you barely notice when Trevor leaves the bed and comes back with a moist towel. He wipes your face, then your thighs and pussy, dropping a kiss on your lower belly after he’s finished. You let out a breath at that, not knowing that you were holding it, astounded by the fragility and intimacy of the moment.

“Daddy,” you say out loud, mostly just to yourself. Mostly just to feel the word on your tongue, feel it take its shape in your mouth. It sounds like awe.

Trevor deposits the towel in the hamper across the room with a toss, proving yet again that his precision and accuracy are off the charts most of the time. He crowds your space, tracing your features with his delicate pinky. “Did Daddy make you feel good, baby?” Trevor asks. “You made Daddy feel good.”

You whine at that and almost want to cry again at the praise. All the time you spent wondering if you were good enough, if you’d ever get a boyfriend who loved you and stayed with you was worth it when you found Trevor. He always said the right things, made you feel things you���d never felt before. 

“I love you,” you say.

Trevor slips his thumb into your mouth, watching your eyes close in bliss as he presses it against your tongue. You can still taste where he was rubbing your pussy with this digit.

“I love you,” he replies, voice soft. His voice sounds like awe, too.

note: small town girl chapter 1 next! (hopefully)

[luv-sims]

forever and always.

⋆ ✩₊˚ ʚ♡ɞ ˚₊✩⋆

arguments with your boyfriend are never easy, but this one- this one may just be the breaking point.

⊹ ࣪ ˖ choi beomgyu x fem reader ⊹ ࣪ ˖

warnings ‧₊˚ argument, insecurities, kissing.

1.8k

(a/n) guys one of my teachers r failing me and there’s a week for me to get my grade up by 7 percent and im so stressed like im not doing well fr my skin is literally all scratched up from my anxiety help me pls☠️😭 im sorry but for the next week im probably not gonna post much :(( see u guys soon <3 (also this was written a long long time ago so if there’s a lot of mistakes in here that’s why!!)

Beomgyu had always been known for his charm and wit, his playful demeanor endearing him to everyone around him. But in private, he could be cold and distant, his mood shifting like the unpredictable weather. Last night had been no exception. The argument had started over something trivial—his lateness, his unexplained absences—but it had escalated into a shouting match that left both of them wounded deeply by each-other’s harsh words thrown.

Beomgyu had stormed out, slamming the door behind him, leaving Y/N alone with her thoughts and regrets. She sighed, running a hand through her hair, and glanced at the clock. It was past midnight, and Beomgyu still hadn't returned. The silence of the apartment was deafening, and Y/N felt a pang of loneliness that she couldn't shake, which had been residing within her for a while now.

“I should head to bed” she mumbled, but as she felt the tiredness of the nights events crawl up into her, she also felt the doom of her relationship with Beomgyu, falling asleep with tears running down her cheeks.

The morning light filtered through the curtains, casting a soft glow on the room. Y/N had barely slept, her mind racing with worry and anger. She couldn't understand why Beomgyu had become so distant, why he seemed to push her away every time they got close. She loved him deeply, but his coldness was breaking her heart.

She heard the front door creak open and sat up, her heart pounding. Beomgyu walked in, his hair damp from the rain, his eyes tired and hollow. He didn't look at her as he shrugged off his coat and kicked off his shoes.

"Where have you been?" Y/N asked, her voice trembling with a mix of anger and concern.

"Out," Beomgyu replied curtly, avoiding her gaze.

"All night? Do you have any idea how worried I was Gyu?”

Beomgyu sighed, running a hand through his wet hair. "I needed some space Y/N."

"Space?" Y/N's voice rose, her frustration boiling over. "You needed space? Beomgyu, you can't just disappear whenever things get tough!"

"Maybe I wouldn't have to if you didn't suffocate me all the time! I come home and here you are just bitching at me all the time!” Beomgyu snapped, his eyes flashing with anger.

Y/N recoiled as if she'd been slapped, her heart aching at his harsh words. "Suffocate you? Is that really how you feel? Bitching at you? I was worried for you, did you know how scared I was?”

Beomgyu's expression softened slightly, regret flickering in his eyes, but he quickly masked it with indifference. "I don't want to fight right now, Y/N."

"Well, that's too bad, because we need to talk about this. You can't keep shutting me out, Gyu. We need to talk about this.”

"There's nothing to talk about," Beomgyu said coldly. "I just needed some time to think."

"Think about what?" Y/N pressed, her voice cracking. "About us? About whether you still want to be with me? Wasn’t leaving me alone last night for the hundredth time enough?”

Beomgyu remained silent, his jaw clenched. The silence filled the atmosphere between them, heavy and oppressive.

"Fine," Y/N whispered, tears streaming down her face. "If you won't talk to me, then maybe you should leave."

Beomgyu stared at her for a moment, his expression unreadable, he let out a quiet scoff before turning on his heel and walking out the door again. This time, the sound of the door closing behind him felt like the final nail in the coffin of their relationship.

Days turned into weeks, and the apartment felt emptier than ever. Y/N went through the motions of her daily life, but the weight of Beomgyu's absence was a constant. She missed him terribly, missed the way he used to make her laugh, the way his eyes would light up when he saw her, and missed what it felt like being loved by Beomgyu.

She couldn't understand what had gone wrong, why Beomgyu had become so distant and cold. She replayed their last conversation over and over in her mind, trying to find some clue, some hint of what had driven him away.

One evening, as Y/N sat alone on the couch, her phone buzzed with a message. Her heart leaped as she saw Beomgyu's name on the screen.

"Can we talk?" the message read.

Y/N's hands trembled as she typed her response. "Okay."

A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. Y/N took a deep breath before opening it to find Beomgyu standing there, looking tired and worn. He didn't say anything as he walked inside, and Y/N closed the door behind him, her heart pounding in her chest.

They stood in silence for a moment, neither of them knowing where to begin.

"I'm sorry," Beomgyu finally said, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'm sorry for everything Y/N”

Y/N felt tears welling up in her eyes. "Why, Beomgyu? Why did you push me away?"

Beomgyu sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I don't know. I guess... I was scared."

"Scared of what?"

"Of losing you. Of letting you get too close and then losing you."

Y/N's heart ached at his words. "Beomgyu, you don't have to push me away to protect yourself. I love you. I want to be with you, no matter what. I won’t lie, you hurt me so bad Gyu, but I love you. Forever and always.”

Beomgyu's eyes softened at her words, Forever and Always, the same words he said to her the day he confessed his love to her, which seems forever ago now and he took a step closer to her.

“I’m so sorry baby, I love you too, Y/N. More than anything. I'm just... not good at showing it.” He says with his voice cracking at his land words as tears filled Beomgyu’s waterline.

Y/N reached out and took his hand, squeezing it gently. "Then show me. Let me in. We can face whatever comes together."

Beomgyu nodded, his eyes filled with determination. "I promise. No more running away."

Y/N smiled through her tears and pulled Beomgyu into a tight embrace. As he held her close, she felt a sense of hope and relief wash over her. They still had a long way to go, but for the first time in weeks, she felt like they were on the right path.

Over the next few weeks, Beomgyu and Y/N worked on rebuilding their relationship. They talked openly and honestly about their fears and insecurities, building up the trust and slowly, the walls between them began to crumble.

Beomgyu made a conscious effort to be more present and attentive, showing Y/N just how much he cared. He would surprise her with little gestures of affection—bringing her favorite flowers, cooking her breakfast in bed, or simply holding her hand as they walked through the park and giving her soft kisses.

Y/N, in turn, was patient and understanding, giving Beomgyu the space he needed while also being there for him whenever he needed support. She could see the effort he was putting in, and it made her love him even more.

One evening, as they sat on the couch together, Beomgyu turned to Y/N with a serious expression. "I want to apologize again for how I treated you. You didn't deserve any of it, I was such an asshole, I don’t deserve you.” He says with a small smile.

Y/N smiled softly and placed a hand on his cheek. "Thank you, Beomgyu. But what's important is that we're working through it together. I believe in us, and you deserve me just as much as I deserve you, we deserve each other.”

Beomgyu leaned in and kissed her gently, his lips soft and warm against hers. It was a kiss filled with love and promise, a symbol of their renewed commitment to each other.

Beomgyu sighs into the kiss as they pulled away, Beomgyu rested his forehead against hers. "I don't ever want to lose you, Y/N."

"You won't," Y/N whispered. "We're in this together, no matter what."

Just when it seemed like things were finally falling into place, a new challenge arose. Beomgyu received an offer to go on a world tour with his band, TXT. It was an opportunity of a lifetime, but it also meant months of separation and uncertainty.

Beomgyu was torn. He didn't want to leave Y/N, especially not after everything they had been through. But he also didn't want to miss out on such a significant opportunity for his career.

One evening, as they sat together on the couch, Beomgyu broached the subject. "Y/N, I got an offer to go on tour with the band."

Y/N's heart sank, of course she knew what that meant, but she forced herself to stay calm. "That's amazing, Gyu. You should go."

"But what about us?" Beomgyu asked, his voice filled with worry. "I don't want to leave you, not again.” He says whispering pressing his forehead onto hers.

Y/N took his hand and squeezed it reassuringly. "We'll be okay. We'll find a way to make it work, we always do Gyu. I believe in us.”

Beomgyu looked into her eyes, searching for any hint of doubt, but all he saw was love and gentleness. He smiled, adoration for you in his eyes and feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. "Thank you, love. I promise I'll make it up to you, mmh?” Beomgyu says fluttering his lashes onto your skin making you giggle and fall into his warm embrace even more.

Y/N leaned in and kissed him softly. "Just promise me you'll come back to me, no more running.” You whisper.

"I promise," Beomgyu whispered against her lips.

The day of Beomgyu's departure arrived all too soon. Y/N stood at the airport, holding back tears as she hugged him tightly.

"Be safe," she whispered, her voice trembling.

"I will," Beomgyu replied, his own voice thick with emotion. "I'll call you every day, I promise."

Y/N nodded, unable to speak as she watched him walk away. As he disappeared into the crowd, she felt a pang of loneliness and fear, but she knew they would get through this. She knew Beomgyu loves her, and she loves him.

Forever and always.

@luv-sims

[friendsoup]

Falin in a Relationship!

Recipe: Falin x Reader, Falin x Feminine! Reader, Reader isn't explicitly a girl but they're a feminine person

WC: 609

Chef's Note: It's been a while since I've written something that isn't reverse1999! I've been meaning to write Dungeon Meshi x Reader for a while! And after checking the tags, I was shocked to see none of the girls being written!!! Dungeon Meshi has so many beautiful women, why is no one writing about them? Anyways, I plan to do one for Marcille too, bc I'd feel bad if I did one of the doomed yuri girls and not the other... Who else should I do? Keep in mind I prefer writing girls!

You have to be INCREDIBLY obvious with your feelings in order to get through to her. No amount of flirting will get through her head. She just thinks you’re being nice.

When you do confess to her, she seemingly doesn’t react at first. She gives a simple “Thank you.” And wanders away. Don’t be fooled though, she’s only doing this so she can hide away and cover her face. She’s deeply flattered and flustered by your confession, she just doesn’t want to show it.

Falin loves gift giving. If she sees something that reminds her of you, she’s getting it right away. Rocks the color of your eyes, robin egg shells (you wore a dress this color once! She remembers it clearly), berries and nuts (she knows which ones you prefer). All of these things will be casually placed into your hands without explanation. She rarely talks about her own feelings, especially her romantic ones, so it’s up to you to decide what they mean.

Quality time is really really big for Falin. She wants to spend as much free time with you as possible. One of her favorite things to do with you is cooking! She likes to experiment in the kitchen, not strictly following the recipe. The success of the dishes varies… Sometimes they’re really good, sometimes they’re hot garbage. But she’ll still eat every bite, as it was a labor of love from the both of you.

Stray animals follow the two of you around constantly. You know it’s because Falin has a weak spot for them and feeds them on her way home, but she denies this adamantly. Stray cats push up against her legs and purr, and stray dogs always wag their tails when she walks by. She seems to have a way with animals that makes them really like her. And because you have her scent on you, they like you too.

Falin gets sensory overload in crowded places. When she’s beginning to grow nervous, she’ll clutch onto your arm and bury her head in your shoulder. Your scent is really calming to her. When you switch perfumes, she gets upset.

The fanciest date you’ll get with Falin is going to a play. She’ll dress in a casual, loose fitting suit (or whatever you dress her in, she doesn’t exactly care for fashion), and might even put on make up. All of that gets washed away however, as Falin always ends up crying during the emotional bits of the show. She’s not exactly a pretty crier either. Puffy red cheeks, snot dripping from her nose, her large eyes slightly red from tears. It’s a good idea to bring a handkerchief if going with her.

HIKES!!! Falin loves going on hikes, and will take you along as well if you let her. She’ll tell you about the herbs, berries, and flowers you see on the way. About how to grow them and their medicinal purposes. She’ll talk about the bugs the two of you see, their behaviors and properties. And she’ll point out all the animals on the trail, and talk about their habits and diets. The amount of knowledge she has on nature is stunning, and you always end up learning something new.

Though Falin is a bit spacey, she never forgets any of your likes or interests. She tries to meet you halfway on them, even if she can’t understand them. She’ll try to read the books you like, play the games you’re into, and watch the things you’re interested in. Even if she doesn’t like it herself, she’ll always try to turn it into something the both of you can enjoy.

[koolades-world]

I absolutely LOVE your headcanons esp the Indian ones they make me feel quite seen even if I'm from a country that have super similar cultures (Mauritius) 💗🫶

But now I have to ask, I'm the eldest cousin so whenever there's a family gathering I'm usually the one stuck looking after all of my little cousins so if I brought one of the brothers with me they would all be wondering who he is to me and would interview him just being like, "Are you his boyfriend?!?!?!"

Any chance I could get any headcanons for the brothers for this? Completely okay if you can't!

hello! yes of course :)

this request was send in more recently but I just got back from a family gathering (as of 5/25 this is very prewritten haha) and got a fresh taste of this because im the eldest cousin too! i understand your pain haha. all of my cousins are little. chasing after kids you sometimes barely know the name of in a sari, lehenga, or salwar kameez is no fun

god this will be so fun to write!! (there’s still a whole bunch of random aunties, uncles and little kids at the house so I’m hiding since I don’t get to leave until tomorrow) like yesterday, most of this was written on mobile since I’m traveling so excuse autocorrect please :)

enjoy <3

Mc who babysits their younger cousins at a family gathering w/ the brothers

Lucifer

he’s getting war flashbacks /j haha and it’s written all over his face

he left home to get away from his brothers and basically entered an environment that’s exactly the same but with easily one hundred times the people

he’s almost impressed on their ability to never shut up and now knows why you’re so good at handling his family

however, he is dadcifer™️ so he’s great with the kids, and will try his best to answer their questions, even ones regarding your relationship status

Mammon

nothing gets past kids, and they can sense his weakness when he’s talking about you. they are ruthless

before they can break him, you have to step in and tell them to pick one question each to ask. he’s not sure how you’re corralled them so well, or how you can even tell some of them apart to the point of reprimanding them for tricking him. no wonder you can keep his family in line

once he realizes your job isn’t over until the night ends and their parents come to get their kids, he tries to sneak off a few times, but he always ends up with a couple shadows and has to come back

eventually he’s resigned to his fate, and finds he much prefers the cute little babies since they’re more than happy to mess with his jewelry, and he gets to pinch their cute little chubby cheeks <3

Levi

as much as he hates it, the kids love him and whatever device he brought along to play with

after promising to replace anything they break, he sits down and plays games with them and finds out he actually enjoys it

the older ones actually engage in the game with him and ask him game related questions, which he's more than happy to answer, and the younger ones can be handed a disconnected controller and still be kept happy

this is to the point where the kids actually forget to question him about who he is, and only ask if he'll be at the next event. who is he to say no?

Satan

you’re prepared, and he thinks he is too until he gets there haha. but, he keeps it together and adapts well

you’ve thought of just about everything, from wearing extra, cheaper bangles to hand to them to keep them happy to man knowing every trick in the book to get them to finish their dinner and he can only hope to reach that level someday

he's very collected though, he tries his best to deflect their questions and keep them off that topic

however, part of him knows that's impossible and eventually he caves and just answers the questions to the best of his ability, hoping you aren't listening. never have you seen him so out of his element

Asmo

if it’s a dry event and for some reason isn’t on the dance floor, or there wasn’t one to begin with, he’s so in love with the job you hate so much haha

he’s so attentive with the kids and adores them. he’s got lots of tricks up his sleeve to keep them entertained

of course, he owns it when one kid asks if he’s your boyfriend and proudly tells them yes, he is, (even if he’s not) and answers any other questions they have even if you’re embarrassed

now, the kids look forward to seeing him and expect him everytime

Beel

he’s very chill and almost finds it enjoyable, mostly there to keep you from losing your mind

when the kids eventually decide the food they picked out wasn’t what they wanted, and instead whatever he’s eating, he’s more than happy to share with them. after, they’re you’re flesh and blood, so they’re his family too

of course he’s their jungle gym and he takes turns tossing them in the air, and giving piggy back rides

he’s not quite sure how to respond to all of their questions, but as long as you’re alright with it, he’ll answer honestly

Belphie

as a youngest himself, he’s overwhelmed. is this what he’s like?

the kids won’t let him sneak away to nap, because they’re hyper aware of everything and will catch him

honestly, he’s more annoyed than anything, but he might take a liking to a few and spend all his time with them. he feels like he’s being attacked by all the questions

he’s a lot nicer to you after that, since he realized that’s your life, and he only got a small taste of it

[merbear25]

Could you do one piece x a cute fem reader who is really good at making desserts and owns a cute bakery!?!?

Hello, hello! This is a super cute request, so I'm happy to write it for you. Since you didn't specify which 3 characters, I chose the ones I had some ideas for. I hope you like what I've written for you 💜💜

CW: SFW, fluff, fem!reader, headcanons

With a fem!reader who bakes and has a bakery (Sanji, Luffy, Koby)

Sanji: Was there anything you couldn’t do? You were already precious to him in every way, but seeing as you not only had a passion for baking, but you also had the drive to open your own business was truly inspiring. He adored watching you express your creativity and adored it even more when others appreciated your hard work. Plus, seeing you in your cute apron and uniform was an added bonus. Being the supportive man that he was, he’d help out around the bakery in any way you needed. Someone called in sick? He’d be there to fill in. The dishwasher broke? He’d wash the dishes himself. Since he was quite the creative one in the kitchen as well, it’d be a lovely bonding moment to bake together, share recipes, and get a little side tracked here and there, his sincerity never leaving him.

“I’m so proud of you.”

Luffy: Admittedly, he wasn’t the best when it came to distinguishing good quality food from bad. That being said, he enjoyed your sweet treats more than anyone else’s. His eyes would sparkle whenever you made something. You learned quickly that if you ever had to bake something for work at home, you had to prepare triple the amount to accommodate Luffy’s constant hunger and lack of self-control. That didn’t mean he’d carelessly eat anything that wasn’t for him, though; he’d just whine a bit about how tasty it looked and how badly he wanted to eat it. When he visited you at the bakery, he’d talk to some of the customers, telling them about which of your baked goods were his favorites. You couldn’t help but feel a warmth in your chest whenever you heard him gushing about how talented he thought you were.

“Everything you make is amazing!”

Koby: You were outstanding in every sense of the word. He was always the kind of person to believe in fighting for what you want, pushing yourself to make it a reality. That's why when you opened your bakery to live part of your dream, he couldn’t help himself: he fell for you all over again. On top of the devotion you had to your business, you were exceptionally talented at what you baked too. Truth be told, you helped keep that fire under him lit. He admired you so much, and you inspired him to keep pushing for his own dreams and wants. Never faltering from the supportive role, he was your biggest cheerleader, offering to help when and how you needed him to—no questions asked. Whenever you were excited about how well something turned out, he was there to listen and encourage you.

“You can do anything. I know you can!”

[jackles010378]

Jealous of Baby.....

(Dean winchester x y/n)

Y/n is fed up of Dean spending all his time with his car............

Y/n had always known about Dean's love for his car, affectionately named 'Baby.' It seemed like the two of them were inseparable. Dean would spend countless hours working on her, meticulously detailing every inch, and taking her out for joyrides across the country. Y/n couldn't help but feel a hint of jealousy, as it seemed like Baby always had Dean's undivided attention.

One sunny afternoon, Y/n decided to confront Dean about her feelings. She found him in the garage, engrossed in yet another project, Baby parked nearby looking pristine as ever. Y/n took a deep breath, preparing for the conversation ahead.

"Dean," she began tentatively, "I feel like you spend more time with Baby than you do with me."

Dean looked up from his work, his brows furrowing in confusion. "What? Y/n, Baby is just a car. You know I love you more than anything."

Y/n couldn't hide her skepticism. "Dean, you're always working on her, taking her on hunts, and talking about her nonstop. It's almost like I'm competing for your affection."

Dean stood up, wiping his hands on a rag. "Y/n, Baby is more than just a car to me. She's been there for me through thick and thin, just like you. I appreciate all that you do for me, but Baby holds a special place in my heart."

Feeling a pang of sadness, Y/n questioned, "But how do I know I'm as important to you as she is?"

Dean's expression softened, and he walked over to Y/n, wrapping his arms around her. "Y/n, the love I have for Baby and the love I have for you are two different things, but they both mean the world to me. Just like Baby has been there for me, you have been my rock, my confidant, and my partner in every aspect of life."

Y/n couldn't help but smile, feeling reassured by Dean's words. "But Dean, sometimes it feels like you prioritize Baby over everything else."

Dean took a step back, looking deeply into Y/n's eyes. "I understand why you might feel that way, but the truth is, Baby isn't just about the car itself. She represents a part of my identity, a connection to my past, and my love for the open road. It's not about the time spent, but the emotions behind it."

Y/n nodded, starting to comprehend the depth of Dean's feelings. "So what can I do to feel more included in this part of your life?"

Dean grinned mischievously. "Well, I have an idea. How about you join me on a road trip? Just the two of us, with Baby by our side. I want you to experience the feeling of wind in your hair, the hum of the engine, and the thrill of the open road."

Y/n's eyes widened with excitement. "Really? You'd do that for me?"

Dean nodded, his eyes sparkling. "Absolutely. I want you to understand that the time spent with Baby isn't about pushing you away—it's about sharing something I love with someone I love."

And so, Y/n and Dean embarked on an unforgettable journey together. As they cruised down the highway, laughter and music filling the air, Y/n realized that Dean's love for Baby wasn't a threat to their relationship but rather an extension of it. Dean showed her that their love could encompass his passions, as long as she was by his side.

From that day forward, Y/n understood that Baby wasn't just a car; she was a symbol of Dean's past, his present, and their future. And in the end, their love for each other proved to be stronger than any trace of jealousy that had once lingered.

Written for the JENSEN-A-THON run by @artyandink 💖

TAGLIST: @k-slla @cevansbaby-dove @kaleldobrev @janineb86 @deans-daydream @alternativeprincess94 @nescavaneck @angelbabyyy99

[punkeropercyjackson]

"You're real fucking sweet but i gotta watch out,you'll burst my bubble,like strawberry POP!"

For @rinverse ' 1 year Atsv annivesary event and illustrated by @a-hypnos-v,my Spidersona:Nora Morales aka Earth 1610's Spiderwoman,also know as Gamespider!

Nora is the eldest Morales sibling at 36/37 with Jefferson and Rio being aged up to their 60s but he's not their bio kid because i'm black biracial instead of monoracial so he's adopted!His parents took him in as a 16 year old street kid who'd been kicked out for being trans,specifically transmasc genderfluid and bigender.The Morales fam are super supportive of him and always have been!!

He's super bubbly,goofy,silly,sweet and kind but very insecure due to his trauma which also included getting bullied at school with zero friends and never went to college because his neurodivergence made school at that level too hard for him(audhd,anxiety and mdd)and Miles having all the same ones didn't help at all.But he never takes it out on him and is super proud of him for how smart he is and they're best friends on top of being adoptive siblings!!!Nora's also really snarky and lowkey cheeky and a huge gamer and geek and actually pretty responsible with good self-care habits contrary to the stereotype because he's a black fem instead of a white dudebro who dosen't read Spiderman comics.His poor social skills made it hard for him to connect with people but he does have a few casual friends in Itsv!No real strong connection though,it's just people he knows well enough.I think it goes without saying but he has hidden anger issues and spiteful tendencies too!

His version of the movies is called 'Spiderman/Spiderwoman:Spiderverse' but would be dubbed Spidersiblings:Spiderverse by fans if he were canon!It's both his and Miles' story as the titulary Spiderman and Spiderwoman so they're co-protagonists and Across has him as the fem mc instead of Gwen

Into him worked at the diner Peter B and Miles talked at and that's why Miles took him to it and Jefferson is a househusband because fuck copganda

Nora actually got bit at work at the same time Miles did while with Ripeter and Nora's intro blends into his as their theme songs play back to back/mixed into eachother:Miles' is 'Sunflower' and Nora's is 'Strawberry Pop',a rap song about black womanhood and Nora's type specifically as it was written for him like Sunflower was for Miles and both have a few lyrics referencing eachother as the heart and soul of Spiderverse.They're open with eachother about almost everything and Nora partially helped raise Miles so he always looked up to him but stopped vocalizing it as he got older so Nora misenterpreted it as him not thinking he was cool anymore and it hurt but he didn't vocalize that either because he found it fair

Nora was close to Uncle Aaron too and had suspiciouns he was hiding something and there's a moment where he jokes that he's secretly a supervillain but pretends not to be to protect the family with a goofy expression and hand gestures and we don't see Aaron's expression on purpose for dramatics and angst sake

His Spider motif is the purple jumping spider so his power is super strong legs including beyond average strength in them and echanced jumping and the rest of his body is already thick beforehand due to age(and so he dosen't look ridicilous LMAO)

Peter B is his main love interest!They bickered a lot in Itsv due to the whole 'extrovert optismist vs introvert pessimist' thing but had relathionship development as they got to know eachother and worked together and ended up crushing on eachother.Nora was the first older trans person Gwen met so she instantly latched onto him because they clocked eachother and he was happy to be friends with her and mutual mentors for lack of a better term(i.e Gwen taught Nora about being Spiderwoman and Nora was a positive adult figure in Gwen's life who took care of and looked out for her).He gets along with Peni,Noir and Spiderham too and Peni is shoujo based instead of moefication bullshit so naturally her and Nora's pastel femme ass hit it off

What's Up Danger? is a Morales Siblings shared theme song and Nora gives Miles ressurances as much as their parents and Peter B do and Peter B himself helps Nora out in feeling like Spiderwoman even before he chills out.There's a scene where Nora devastates that Miles will never look up to him like he used to but will make a great Spiderman and Miles is shocked speechless before he say he just didn't think he needed to say it anymore and got made fun of for admiring his big sister so much by his bullies because he talked about him at school a few times and tells him he never stopped being his hero and that he's 'the most awesome Spidersister in any universe' and that's what gives Nora the confidence to really be Spiderwoman as they rush off to the collider after hugging tightly and grinning at eachother.Nora is Spiderwoman(male)and Miles is Spiderman(female)

Nora showed bits of interest in punk culture in Into and goes full pastel punk/afropunk between it and Across and that's where his suit upgrade comes in and Itsv!Nora dressed like an afrolatina grandma tbh while Atsv!Nora dresses like a baddie and a huge faggot(complimentary).Spiderwoman is frequently seen at riots and charity events and Spiderman accoumpanies him when he's not too busy with school shit.Also Spiderwoman dosen't follow the no kill rule just for the exception of abusers and fascists

Nora becomes even more parental acting post Uncle Aaron's death for obvious reasons and there's direct talk of him in Across because of how important he was to the Spidersiblings.As Spider(wo)man,Nora naturally has something going on with all adult MJ's(meaning yes 1610 MJ and 616 MJ but not Em Jay because she's Gwen's age)and there's a joke of this when they sneak into the Kingpin party with the Mjnora interaction that implies bisexual MJ who loves all Spidermans regardless of gender

Atsv has a rework of it's intro sequence with a speech by the og Spiderfam(Miles,Nora,Gwen and Peter B)and same for the actual art/animation in it and Nora is the first amongst them to discover Spider Society,followed by him and Peter B reuiniting in a corny romantic scene that's interrupted by Miguel and Jessica and it cuts back and forth to them and Gwen as contrast and Gwen and Nora have an equally tender reunion as she frantically tells him what happened to her in a meltdown and he comforts her as they make it to Spider Society.Nora excitedly says he can't wait to tell Miles about it until Miguel says he can't just yet and refuses to tell him why so Nora just gives up and follows along because he's so fucking annoying about it.The movie is extended to almost 3 hours and there's a lot of Nora and Miles bonding in Earth 1610 and Peternora replaces Ghostflower as the love story of the movie and Gwen and Miles are platonic to not feel like it's only a thing because they're the other two main Spiderpeople

Hobie and Nora did the Spiderman pointing meme when they first met because they're both punk Spiderpeople and acted like they'd known eachother for years after only a few days of friendship and Nora basically adopted Hobie as his little brother and pseudo-son.They're platonic t4t black love realness and Margo gets in on it too since him and Nora have a shared special interests in video games and other matching tastes and Nora provides a shoulder to cry on when Mr and Mrs Kess are being extra toxic.He also helped Peni post Canon Event to cope and could relate from his own broken childhood that turned him into an edgecase too at the time and Pavitr and him are beyond unserious together and Gwen lives with Hobie fulltime on his boat and Nora visits them often enough to parent them it's pretty much his second house

This earns Nora the nickname 'Spider Manager' since they call themselves the Spiderband and he's their mentor/caretaker(Also George Stacy is Nora's canon event cop /hj.MURK THAT NIGGA!!!!!!)

Punkflower happens and their dynamic is the same because they're already so romantically-coded but there's more scenes and expansion due to longer run time.Ghostbyte also is together but there's tension going on not due to antagonizing eachother but due to Gwen's fated death and Margo's self-worth issues in regards to romance because of the 'disposable black love interest' trope.I wouldn't say they're on the same level because misogynoir is a very real thing but i think it's a good angle to work with in-universe and i'm a black woman myself so i'd say it's okay for me to since it's my territory

Jessnora is REALLLLLLL THEY'RE SO FUCKING GAY.Jessica still has a husband and is pregnant but they're polyamorous so it's okay with him them being a thing and Jessnora is that one trope where they're both chaotic but one's classy and elegant and smooth about it and the other's just a fucking menace with NO fanciness to them.Noraguel is also real in an enemies to lovers and rather angsty way as Nora actually changes a lot of Miguel's views by working with him and making him spend quality time so he unwinds but he's still scared to loose everything all over again and Spiderman and Spiderwoman in the same dimension makes them The Original Anomalies and it's a long while before he connects the dots and is too blinded by his trauma to see reason.He knows he loves Nora too but Nora has no clue on his feelings or Miguel's and it's torture because he can't figure out why he's so important to him but nonetheless dosen't hesitate to beat his ass and come for his entire life

42 Nora aka Nora J(Junia)is Venom's host who ran away from home post Jefferson's death because it broke him and is a vigilante like Miles G but much darker in his plots and sourer and meaner.There's a horror movie based reveal in the finale where Miles thinks he's safe because his Nora is with him but he turns and reveals himself as Venom-faced but has no actual intentions of hurting him contrary to his terror and his actual Nora gets Miles G and there's a dual frame reveal where the 42 Morales Siblings say the same thing:'I'm Miles/Nora Morales'

42 Nora/Nora J is also known as 'Venora',Nora has the trans pin on his Atsv costume to match Gwen's room flag,all Spiderpeople have special move the others can't do and Nora's being able to hack with his webs thanks to being kinda a criminal to get by when he was a homeless kid giving him experience beforehand and Beyond has Nora helping Miles G get that redemption-healing arc so at some point he asks him why he's so insistant on caring about him so Nora responds 'I'm gonna save you even if it kills me.You're my sunflower too'

[andypantsx3]

do you have any tips or advice for being more confident about your writing / avoiding the comparison trap on here? /gen

Hello my love!! Oh my gosh, I have a zillion and one thoughts on this subject. Please excuse how disorganized this is but I am so happy to word vom at you lmao.

I think to start with, it depends on what you're comparing: whether it's the work itself or the metrics surrounding it! I will start with the work itself, and move on to talking about metrics if that's cool.

Your Story

In terms of the quality of your work, there are a couple key things to remember!! Firstly, think it's easy to feel like so many tropes and story lines have already been done, why would anyone want to read mine? But you can circumvent this quite intentionally in your writing by thinking about what new thing you can bring to that trope or story line. And make no mistake, there is always something new, whether it's a plot twist, a unique motivator, a different character's perspective, etc.

For example, I've read and loved several merman Shouto fics, and I also wanted to write a merman Shouto fic. In the development of something in the water, I sat down and thought about what things I'd read about merman Shouto before, and how could I add to that, outside of rehashing what I'd already read. I discovered I wanted to expand on mating rituals, spend some time on the cultural differences a human and merman would inevitably have, and linger in the feeling of a tropical island because at the time of the fic's conception it was like, the dead of my winter LOL. And I do think that something in the water has turned out pretty distinct for that effort; as far as I am aware no one has written merman Shouto being wheeled into a tropical bungalow in a wheelbarrow to watch The Little Mermaid lol.

So you can always bring something new to the table! And it will make your work feel standout to you, as well, as you will be very aware of all the things you did that were unique!! You will not feel like you're just rehashing something that has already been done, you will feel like you're adding!

Also in terms of quality, I think it's helpful to look at fic writing like a growth opportunity rather than a permanent, established skill set. The "quality" of your style is not fixed, it something you actively develop by reading, digging into other people's styles, seeing how they make their writing work, and trying out some of those elements for yourself. Maybe someone has a really rich descriptive style that you find beautiful, maybe someone writes dark psychological fics that thrill you; if you spend time looking at the words they are using and how they use them, you can replicate those techniques in your own writing. You can quite literally make your own writing look more like the writing you admire by reverse engineering authors' techniques.

Conversely, writing as a growth opportunity mean you do not have to be perfect. The process of writing is the process of figuring out what works, mechanically. It's not a reflection on you at all. You don't have to write anything "good," you can publish something you had fun with, see what people react positively to in it, and turn around and take those elements forward in your next story, while abandoning the things people maybe did not love or had questions on. And rinse and repeat over and over until you do end up with something you'd term "quality."

To me at least, that thought is a huge relief. Because I can just have fun, let people say what they say, and do something different in my next story if needs must. It's like any skill set, I think. It takes time to hone but no one would call, like, Van Gogh untalented because he once started with rough and heavy pencil sketches, right?

It's the knowledge that I'm building up my future self's skill set that gives me confidence to publish, even if I'm not quite where I want to be currently! And I really hope this helps you the way it does me; the knowledge that you can do anything, write like anyone, but that it's all part of an overarching process to learn to enjoy writing like you!

Which brings me to:

The Metrics

I am just going to say flat out that you should try to ignore metrics as best you can. In my experience, metrics are absolutely no indicator of a work's quality. Some of the work I am proudest of is what anyone would consider a "flop" by note count, whereas I think some of my most trite & banal works would be considered by some metric quite "popular." And I think that way about some of my favorite fics too, one of my absolute fave fics of all time only recently broke 100 kudos on ao3 after being up for years!!

I especially think this is true on tumblr, where a work's packaging and digestibility seem to be the key elements in gaining notes (ao3 does not allow the same level of customization). Fics with elaborate headers, cute & small fonts (I am guilty of loving these), and eye-catching graphics all naturally draw attention more easily in the sea of other fics, so it makes sense why more people would tend to look at those, and subsequently like or reblog them. I also think bullet-pointed headcanons or single/short paragraph works tend to skyrocket in notes here because they're quick and easy; and that makes sense too, right? If it's easier to read of course it's likelier to be read more!

But those things mean absolutely nothing about the quality of the work within. And you can take reassurance from the fact that you too can replicate those elements if note count is what you are truly after here! You can make a video header with any of the premades on Canva! You can try different font arrangements or cool graphics. You can even write a paragraph and tag it with a bunch of different characters for maximum exposure. There is no reason to get jealous, I think, if you can do it too!!

I also think you have to be conscious of different factors at play with authors. Some authors have been around since the inception of the fandom you're in, and naturally will have had more visibility for longer than you, but that also says nothing about the quality of their work. I've been around in the BNHA fandom for four years, and by a mixture of luck and timing ended up getting to publish a lot of my work during the pandemic when more people than ever were getting into BNHA. But does that make me better than some of the newer authors joining the fandom just now? HELL no lol, if anything maybe I could be getting complacent!

And this goes for the size of fandoms and the popularity of certain characters as well!! A Shouto fic is not going to do as well as a Bakugou fic because Bakugou has like, three times the stans. A Shinsou fic is not going to do as well as a Shouto fic because Shouto has like, five times the stans lol. And a Kaiju no. 8 fic is not going to do as well as a JJK fic because the fandom size (and therefore potential audience pool) has a significant discrepancy! Don't gauge your fic's success against someone else's in a different fandom or for a different character (or honestly even at a different point in the source material's storyline because sometimes a character has a moment where they are most popular but that drops off - think BNHA Hawks in 2020/2021 vs now lol).

There is a huge variety of external factors at play that determine your exposure and audience, but absolutely none of those can ever say anything about the quality of your work. So I hope you can try to distance yourself from the need to compare your metrics to anyone else's, because quite frankly they do not mean shit.

TLDR, think the best way to overcome the comparison trap is to write a story you love and feel is unique, something you are proud of. Because no one is ever going to tell a story quite how you would, and therefore no one can ever be compared. & I hope this was helpful and addressed whatever specific area of concern you have!! But let me know if not and I'm happy to discuss more!!

[e-dubbc11]

Trivia Night

Photos are not mine. They are courtesy of Pinterest/Google.

Pairing: Billy Russo x F! Reader (wife)

Warnings: Some swear words, little violent, nothing major though, sexual reference, fluffy bunnies and unicorns

Word Count: 4.5K-ish

Summary: Trivia night at one of your favorite bars with your favorite people. Billy is late and you have to fill his spot with someone no one else is really fond of, especially Frank and Ginger

A/N: This one has been done for a few days but life got in the way of me putting it out. Finally had some time. Part of the Gingerverse. I’ll put the collection HERE. I haven’t written for them in awhile and I’ve missed it so this was fun. I hope you like it!

As always, thank you for reading!  I appreciate it so much and comments, reblogs are welcome and encouraged. Don’t be shy to tell me your favorite part. 💕💕 💕

With music playing in the background, you sat at the bar with your friends staring at the beer in front of you. Poured perfectly, the high white foam piled high in the glass but not too high and melding into the citrusy white ale underneath.

It was a blend of orange, lemon and lime peel with a hint of spice from Grains of Paradise which was a rare pepper from West-Africa and considered an aphrodisiac.

Your head was full of little factoids and knowledge which is why Ginger thought it would be fun to do a trivia night at one of your favorite bars and it was also another way for Frank and Ginger to continue their “friendly” competition with each other.

The bar held a trivia contest every Thursday night and you were finally able to get everyone together for a fun night out. Of course, Frank and Maria were there, along with Ginger and another friend from work, Jules. You were just waiting for Billy to show up and complete your two teams of three but he was, once again, held up at work.

“Where’s your husband, kid? If he doesn’t get here soon, you’re gonna need another teammate so I can beat Ginger fair and square.” Said Frank.

“Keep talkin’ shit, Frank. We’ll see who answers more questions.” Ginger replied with a furrowed brow.

“I don’t know where he is. He promised he would be here but they’re starting soon.” You said with a worried look on your face.

You were going to have to find an alternate teammate.

The foam from the head of your beer touched the tip of your nose as you took a sip. The bright wheat ale was refreshing as it cooled and coated your throat. The bubbles tickled the inside of your nose as you set the beer back down onto the bar and the coaster underneath your glass was slightly damp from the condensation.

Searching the bar one more time for Billy, your eyes spotted a familiar face. The last time you had seen him was at your birthday party a few years ago before Billy had told you how he really felt about you. He was also the reason Billy almost left that night because you were dancing with him.

It was Lucas.

“Hey stranger!” He said, as he went in for a hug. “How are you?!”

Nervously, you replied, “I’m good, Lucas, really good. How have you been? It’s been a little while. You still working for Billy?”

He nodded. “Yep, actually he was still there when I left a little while ago.”

Glancing at your watch, you replied, “Yeah he’s supposed to be here for trivia time so our team is one player short at the moment.”

He took a sip from his beer bottle and a sly smile stretched across his face as he said, “I can fill in for him until he gets here.”

Both Frank and Ginger were staring at you, they glanced at each other and then turned their gaze back to you, well, back to Lucas. They both had a look of mistrust on their faces, narrowed eyes and furrowed brows. You loved how protective they were of you but it’s a public place with an old co-worker, what was going to happen?

As you pulled the barstool up, you said with an innocent smile, “Hey guys! Frank you know Lucas.” You said pointing in between the two of them. And turning to Ginger, you said, “Yeah, remember he was at my birthday party before I left Anvil.”

Still with her eyes narrowed, she replied, “Uh huh, yeah I think I remember. Silver Springs guy, right?”

Lucas nodded.

Ginger pulled him over to the barstools and said, “Alright stud, get comfortable, you’re gonna fill in until Billy gets here. You better be smart too, I’m not losin’ to Frank.”

Frank smirked at her. “We’ll see, Ginger.”

You turned to Lucas and said, “They’re a TAD competitive with each other. It’s comical to watch.”

“Oh I can’t wait.” He replied.

**********

Billy was always in awe of how smart you are. He even went as far as saying you should try out for Jeopardy. A lot of nights after the two of you had dinner, you would turn it on while you were cleaning up in the kitchen.

“The answer is…This element has the highest atomic number that occurs naturally.” Said the host.

You said, “What is Uranium?”

“This Russian author wrote War and Peace.”

Again, you replied with the correct question, “Who is Tolstoy?”

“Located in Jordan, this ancient city is known for its rock-cut architecture.”

“What is Petra?” You said.

“What is Citizen Kane?”

“Who was Winston Churchill?”

“What is a Life of Service?”

“Who is Victor Hugo?”

With his dress shirt rolled up to his elbows, Billy stood at the sink washing the pots and pans with a smirk on his face and a towel draped over his shoulder. He’d hand them off for you to dry as you rattled off question after question.

“You’re amazing, my love.” He had told you. “You really should try out, I’m serious.”

“I’m not that smart, Billy. There are so many more people out there smarter than me.” You said.

After drying his hands off on the towel, he pulled you in by your waist, your body was flush with his, and his hands were still warm from the hot water from the faucet. Billy tilted your chin up with his long slender fingers so you were looking into his onyx colored eyes, smiling that perfect smile at you. That smile could get you to do pretty much anything. It was your kryptonite…in a good way.

“Why do you doubt yourself so much, sweet girl?” Asked Billy in a silvery tone.

Glancing down at his arms wrapped tightly around you, you replied with a shrug, “I dunno. I guess I’ve always had that feeling that I’m not good enough. Plus, I’m highly competitive so if I don’t win, I feel like a loser.” You said with a slight smile.

“You and me both, baby.” Said Billy. “Our kids are gonna be in trouble.” He said with a wink.

You laughed as he gently pressed his lips to yours. They tasted like the bittersweet piece of chocolate he had after dinner.

“Will you do something for me, beautiful? Just think about it? I wouldn’t blow smoke up your ass and tell you you’re good enough when you’re not. You know that.” Said Billy.

You snaked your arms around his neck and gently raked your nails against his scalp. His raven colored hair glided through your fingers as you kissed him again. Slipping his tongue between your lips, his kisses became hungrier as you angled your head so he could kiss up and down your neck.

“Not fair, handsome. That’s called coercion when you kiss me like that.” You said as warmth spread across your cheeks and chest.

“Does that mean you’ll think about it?” He asked, brushing his knuckles against your cheek.

You rolled your eyes playfully at him as he stood in front of you smiling like a Cheshire cat. Billy knew exactly what he was doing.

“Ok, you win Billy. I’ll think about it.” You said, biting back a smile.

He replied, “That’s all I ask, my love.”

**********

You were sitting in between Lucas and Ginger. Frank, Maria and Jules looked very ready to answer some questions and before you knew it, the contest had started. Billy had promised he would be here but he was late and the game had started without him. Unsure of the rules, you didn’t even know if he could jump in when he got there.

Billy worked harder than anyone you’ve ever met. You couldn’t fault him for wanting to be the best, fighting to stay on top, and be the best security detail in the city. Sometimes he broke his promises which most of the time you let go but this one hit a little differently.

It was upsetting. You just wanted to have some fun with him and he was missing it but you were determined to have a good time anyway.

You were on fire tonight though. There wasn’t a question you didn’t answer correctly even when it wasn’t your turn.

“How many moons does Neptune have?” Your host asked.

You answered confidently, “Fourteen.”

“What is the fear of flowers called?” They asked.

“Anthophobia.” You replied.

“How many staircases are located in Hogwarts?” Their voice sounded frustrated because they couldn’t stump you.

You answered with a sly smile, “142.”

With his arm touching yours, Lucas leaned in and whispered, “How do you know all of this stuff, y/n?”

“Oh, just stuff I picked up here and there.” You replied.

You thought Lucas was harmless, but Ginger and Frank felt otherwise. In between their score keeping with each other, you swear they were silently communicating about how close Lucas was to you and keeping an extra close eye on him to make sure he didn’t try anything.

“He’s a little too close to you, don’t you think?” Said Ginger, in your ear.

Looking down at her leg and yours, they were practically touching so you replied, “Well the barstools are really close together. What am I supposed to do? Sit in your lap?”

“I’d say he still has a thing for you.” Ginger whispered, almost glaring at Lucas.

You whispered back, “Ok, well I NEVER had a thing for him. Also I’m very much in love with my husband.”

“I know that…just…well just watch his hands. I don’t trust him and neither does Frank.” She said.

You glanced over at Frank. He looked as if he could spit nails. “Yes, I can see that.” You replied. “I’ll be on high alert. Ready to do some Kung-Fu Panda if I need to.”

Ginger started to laugh and sing a verse from Kung Fu Fighting while Frank rolled his eyes and Maria chuckled.

While this was going on, you became hyper aware of how much Lucas was drinking and gradually inching closer to you. He looked like he was feeling pretty good and it was starting to make you a little uncomfortable but you tried to ignore him.

After a little while, it was break time. Time to stretch your legs, run to the bathroom, have a snack…whatever you felt like doing for a few minutes before the second round started. Frank and Ginger were arguing who had answered more questions correctly between the two of them.

There was the team score and then their personal scores that they kept track of. It was hard not to laugh when they would go back and forth and get under each other’s skin. Both of them, however, kept a close eye on you but mostly they were watching Lucas.

Maria caught the two of them eyeing you like a hawk.

“What are you two glaring at over here? Or maybe I should ask, WHO are you two glaring at over here?” She asked.

Without taking his eyes away from you, Frank replied, “We’re watching to see if Lucas makes any moves on y/n. I know he still has a thing for her, I feel it.”

Maria folded her arms across her body and playfully rolled her eyes.

“Baby, I’m sure y/n can take care of herself. Being with Billy all this time, I’m sure she’s learned a thing or two about defending herself if Lucas is stupid enough to try anything.” She said.

Ginger jumped in, “Yeah but it’s not just us, right? She looks a little uncomfortable talking to him.”

In an unsure tone, Maria replied, “I mean, I guess maybe a little bit.”

You finally saw the familiar face you had been waiting for all night to arrive. Scanning the bar, Billy’s dark brown eyes locked with yours and a wide smile stretched across his lips as he rushed toward you. Without realizing what you were doing, you walked away from Lucas and started walking toward Billy.

Excusing himself, he worked his way through the sea of people until you were close enough for him to touch. You crashed against his chest and melted into his embrace. Billy brushed your hair over your shoulder, snaked his arms around you, and held you while he apologized over and over again.

“I’m so sorry I’m late, sweet girl. I’m sorry.” Whispered Billy against the top of your head.

For a brief moment, you had forgotten how angry you were with him that he was late, yet again, and smiled against his chest while listening to the rapid beating of his heart.

“You’re VERY late, Billy. I had to find someone to fill in for you.” You said.

Billy glanced around the bar before he asked, “Who did you get on short notice, my love?”

Just as you were about to answer, Lucas said, “Me…she got me to fill in for you. Finally done at the office, huh Mr. Russo?”

Billy narrowed his eyes and gave Lucas a devilish smile before he answered, “Yeah…I am. Well I’m here now so you can take off.”

A cunning smile stretched across Lucas’s face as he replied, “Actually, I just asked the person in charge and there aren’t any substitutions after the game has started so it looks like you’ll just have to sit and watch, Mr. Russo. Your wife is…” He paused to stare at you. “She’s amazing. You know how smart she is?”

Billy replied with gnashed teeth, “I do, Lucas. Yes, MY wife is incredibly smart.”

“Oh, well I guess you do know then. They’re about to start, y/n. I’ll see you back at our seats.” He said.

Billy glared at Lucas as he walked back to his seat then turned back to talk to you. His body was stiff and the muscles in his shoulders tensed while his knuckles showed white as he clenched his fist.

“I don’t like the way he’s looking at you.” He hissed.

You rolled your eyes a little.

“Baby, you never like the way any man looks at me.” You said, looking up at him through your lashes.

“Yeah, well I know Frankie and Ginger feel the same way.” Said Billy.

“They texted you, huh?” You asked.

Billy nodded, his lips pressed into a straight line. You could tell he was furious.

“Well maybe you should have done a better job of trying to get here on time, Billy.” You said, turning on your heels and walking back to your seat.

He called out after you, “Sweet girl, I said I was sorry!”

“You’ve been sorry a lot lately, Billy. Maybe this will teach you a lesson.” You said.

You knew how Billy could be, how jealous he gets, and how possessive he is of you but he had been disappointing you more often lately because of work. He had been canceling dates, coming home late, and missing dinner. Maybe this was a tough lesson he needed to learn.

Ginger stopped you before you could get back to your seat.

“Awesome, Billy’s here! We can ditch the dummy, he doesn’t know anything anyway.” She said.

You started to shake your head back and forth and replied, “We can’t, Ginger…guy in charge said we can’t swap out. So we’re stuck with him for two more rounds.”

Frank walked up behind you.

“I’m ahead by one, Ginger. They’re gettin’ ready to start round two.” He said.

“They won’t let Billy play because he showed up late.” She said.

“What?! So you’re stuck with him for two more rounds? That’ll teach Bill to be late, yeah?” Said Frank.

Lucas was sitting in his seat, drinking his beer with a smug look on his face. You knew he was trying to make Billy jealous and it didn’t take much to get Billy’s blood to boil. The scorching glare he directed at Lucas could probably be felt by the entire bar as he sipped his bourbon.

But they were starting the second round and you directed your concentration to answering the questions and not toward Billy. In between questions, Lucas would lean in and whisper things to you like “You’re doing great.” And “That one was really hard, how did you even know that?” It was really making your stomach turn but you didn’t want to be rude. You made it through round two and only had to make it through one more round.

“I got five questions right that round, Frank. You forgot to mark that last one down.” Said Ginger.

“No I didn’t, Ginger. It’s that one right there.” Frank said, pointing down at his scrap paper.

“Well, my paper says I have one more.” She said.

“Then you’re cheating.” He said.

Ginger’s jaw dropped open. “I am NOT cheating and I am deeply insulted that you would even think that. I can beat you fair and square.”

Maria interjected, “Baby, I think you did forget one.”

“Hey, whose side are you on, anyway?” Frank said, looking at her fondly with a smirk on his face.

Meanwhile, a few feet down from where Frank and Ginger were “discussing” their totals, you were trying to reassure Billy that Lucas wasn’t going to try anything and there was only one more round left before it was over.

“There’s only one more round left and then we can go home, ok?” You said.

Lightly brushing his beard with your thumb, you smiled warmly at him and gave him a quick kiss on the lips before returning to your seat.

Billy nodded and tried to smile at you but you could tell he was still angry and jealous.

Round three questions were a little more difficult…

“How many noses does a slug have?” They asked.

Deep in thought but distracted at the same time, you blurted out the first number that came to mind.

“Four?” You replied in an unsure tone.

“Four is correct!” They said, excitedly.

“What are baby rabbits called?”

“Kits.”

“Who painted ‘Girl with the Pearl Earring?’”

“Vermeer”

“What 1949 science fiction book by author George Orwell describes a dystopian world in the future?”

“Twenty-Twenty-Fo—oh wait, sorry…I mean, 1984.” You said with a wide grin.

Billy chuckled a little at that one but his smile disappeared when he saw Lucas inch closer to whisper something in your ear.

“And she’s funny too.” He said, placing a hand on your knee and squeezing.

Your body immediately tensed and your face tightened as well. You could actually feel the color leaving your face and Billy could tell something was wrong.

You looked over at him, silently telling him that you didn’t like what was happening. Lucas slowly moved his hand up your thigh while looking over at Billy. Your body temperature started to rise and your heart started to race.

Earlier, you thought maybe Lucas was just being extra friendly because it had been awhile since you had seen him last but now you realized that he must still be upset because you left the night of your birthday party with Billy and not him.

“Take your hand off of me, Lucas.” You said through gnashed teeth.

His touch made your skin crawl.

“Don’t make a scene, pretty girl. We have to finish the game.” He whispered.

Billy got up from his barstool and started to walk over toward you but not before you planted your left leg and kicked Lucas’s barstool out from under him with your right. He was leaning forward when his stool disappeared from under him so his face smashed against the bar and he landed on the floor clutching his nose, yelling out in pain.

Looking down, you noticed blood dripping from in between his fingers while he weaved a string of profanities as he tried to get the bleeding to stop.

When he looked up at you, his face was flushed with rage as you smiled kindly, clutched your imaginary pearls and in a patronizing voice, asked, “Oh my goodness, Lucas! Are you alright? Did you lose your balance?” Then in a low voice only he could hear, you whispered, “Don’t you fuckin’ touch me ever again. We’re never going to happen so get over it. I’m married to your boss, dipshit. Although, after this I’m guessing he won’t be your boss for much longer.” You said with a devilish smile.

Ginger was trying to cover her mouth so no one would see her laughing but she was doing a terrible job. “Holy shit, where did you learn to do that?!” She asked in a surprised tone.

“My husband taught me.” You said loud enough for Billy to hear.

Billy winked at you, sending delightful shivers up and down your spine. He handed Lucas a bar napkin and growled in his face, “You’re FIRED and don’t you EVER come near my wife again. She knows how to do a lot more than just kick barstools, asshole.”

You heard Maria’s voice behind you, “See Frank, I told you she could take care of herself.”

“Time to go, Lucas. Let’s go.” Said Frank, pulling him to his feet and walking him toward the door and holding him by his shirt.

“I knew he would try somethin’ sooner or later! I hate to say I told ya so buuuuut…” Said Ginger with a wide smile.

Billy took your hand in his and gently brushed your cheek with the other. A look of concern washed over his face as he continued to look you over to make sure you were alright.

“You ok, sweet girl?” He asked.

“I’m fine, baby. I’m fine. You see what I did? Huh?” You asked with raised eyebrows and wide eyes.

He let out a little laugh and pulled you flush to him. Billy inhaled sharply and exhaled forcefully; feeling the tension leave his body, you wrapped your arms tightly around his back and you could feel the smirk play across his lips against the top of your head.

“I did and I gotta say it made me a little hard.” He purred as a tremor of pleasure went straight to your core. “All jokes aside, I’m gonna try to make more time for us and for our friends. I know I’ve been really busy lately. I’m so sorry, baby.”

With your body molded against his, your eyes closed in relief as his long slender fingers danced up and down your back. Nothing felt better than being in Billy’s embrace.

“That would really mean a lot to me, my love. I know how hard you work but you deserve to relax and have fun too.” You said, smiling against his chest.

As his gazed raked over you, Billy’s eyes were like pools of dark chocolate, rich and sweet. They were warm, inviting and begging for your forgiveness. He really was sorry. You felt it in the way he held you, the way he looked at you, and as his lips gently pressed against yours, you felt it in the way he kissed you.

“I’ll learn one of these days, sweet girl.” Said Billy as he kissed your forehead.

You replied with a subtle smile, “We have all the time in the world, handsome.”

Ginger interrupted the kiss between you and Billy.

“Well since you took out our teammate, how are we gonna finish the game now?” She asked. “Our TEAM obviously won because you have a ridiculous amount of information stored in that big brain of yours BUT, I need to finish round three against Frank.”

Ginger looked around at the group, wondering if any of you had an idea of how to finish up trivia night.

“Well, I know my beautiful wife has stacks of trivia cards all over the place at home so we could all go there for a couple more drinks, more trivia, and I can properly introduce myself to Jules…” Said Billy, extending his hand for her to shake. “Hi…I’m Billy. I’m y/n’s dumbass husband and she ended up in a bar fight because I was late.”

Jules laughed and started to blush, extended her hand to shake Billy’s, and said, “You’re right, y/n. He really does have a smile that will melt your insides. I don’t know how you can stay mad at him with a smile like that.”

“He definitely has an unfair advantage, that’s for sure.” You replied. “And I did not get into a bar fight, Billy.”

“Hey, he left the bar with a broken nose because of you, did he not?” Said Billy with a wink.

You bit back a smile as you narrowed your eyes at him and shook your head. It really was hard to stay mad at him…you loved him so much.

“Alright then…to the house of Russo! Let’s finish this, Castle!” Exclaimed Ginger.

“Lead the way, Ginger.” Said Frank, ushering her to go ahead of him.

Billy leaned in close and whispered, “Can we do a lightning round and get everyone to go home quicker? I’m still turned on from watching you bash Lucas’s face against the bar.”

A blur of a smile played across your lips as you replied, “OK number one…gravity did that to Lucas’s face, not me, and two…I’ll see what I can do about the lightning round. I love you, Billy.”

He quickly cupped your cheeks and his lips collided with yours. Sweeping your lower lip, Billy’s tongue parted your lips to twist and knot with yours. The taste of vanilla from the bourbon lingered on his tongue as warmth spread across your chest and his hands ran up and down the curves and hollows of your body.

All was forgiven.

Walking together arm in arm, you and Billy headed for home with your friends, talking about your day, and talking about what he missed from trivia night. You weren’t looking at him but you could feel his eyes on you and smell the remnants of his spicy cologne on his jacket. It was all so familiar and comfortable as his body was a warm cradle for yours while you laughed with each other all the way home.

Billy tried his best to learn from his mistakes and he hated to disappoint you because he knows what that feels like. To wait for someone, hoping they’ll show up and they never do. He never wanted to do that to you.

That fear of abandonment was still strong even after all this time, after all of the “I love you’s,” after the forever promises to each other, it was still there. Billy may never get over it but you would always be there for him in whatever way he needed you to be.

The perfection he strived for in your relationship was unattainable, nobody is perfect but it didn’t stop him from trying, learning what not to do, and it was ok to have these teachable moments like tonight. He took it all in and he would be better next time, you had no doubt about that.

Tag List: @wheresthesunshinesblog @idaoftheburningmind @rafaelakelley @snowkestrel @fakehappy27 @music-indie-tv @fictional-hooman @kayhi808 @munsonownsmyass @gijos @celestialend @k-marzolf @nutmeg17 @rosaleenablack @vaguekayla @qu1etwolf @danzer8705 @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf @aoi-targaryen

Others that might enjoy: @itwasthereaminuteago @fluffyprettykitty @jvanilly @imagine-a-fictional-boyfriend @ittybxttykxttytxtty @mrsbillyrusso

If you’d like to be added (or removed from) my tag list(s) for the ever so handsome Billy Russo, just let me know and thank you again for reading! 💕💕💕 If I tagged you but you didn’t want to be, just let me know and I’ll never do it again.

[priceofreedom]

why are Aerith, Tifa and Zack ALWAYS the target in this freaking fandom

[itsalwaysforyou]

just remembered a wip i had which was jay at uni meeting normal people and desperately trying to act cool and normal whilst internally screaming about being in a whole new place with all new people and not having his gang with him

[softestepilogue]

y’all keep saying how y’all hope ed becomes redeemable and like who tf cares he did anything wrong lmao. pushing Lucius overboard? hilarious. stranding the crew? hysterical. chopping off iffy’s toes? comedic af. y’all always so worried about a character being redeemable or morally right and it’s exhausting. that’s why modern books are what they are now. boring and lame af. ed is morally gray. he’s always been morally gray. he don’t like killin but he likes maimin and he has anger issues. and he’s hilarious when he does all of it.

[icewindandboringhorror]

I’m always paranoid of my tumblr being deleted or malfunctioning or something like that someday, so here’s other places to find me/follow me, just in case lol

~ instagram - https://www.instagram.com/lucalicatte/

~ main youtube - https://www.youtube.com/c/LucaLiCatte

~ games/sims youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@cloudycatte

~ facebook page (I rarely use this because I hate facebook but.. it at least allows text posts better than instagram does, so idk maybe I’d use it more if tumblr went away? lol) - https://www.facebook.com/cloudycatteart/

~ Other Links (stuff I don’t use often/isn’t Main enough to list here, like twitter, neopets, other tumblr sideblogs, youtube channels, etc.) are here - http://icewindandboringhorror.tumblr.com/otherlinks )

[enjolrasofficial]

i saw you’re currently reading the captive prince and now i have to ask: do you think it’s worth the read? like i remember reading it at sixteen thinking ‘what the shitfuck is this?!?!’, like i hated it, absolutely hated it. but i have no recollection of the plot or anything other than my dislike. and i have had people tell me that they like it a lot, so i’m considering a reread simply to either cement my dislike or change it. would love to hear your thoughts on it just out of curiosity!

Heyyyy omg thank you for asking bc i have LOTS of thoughts about captive prince and i'm ALWAYS ready to rant about it!!

okay so i have very strong opinions about cp (and i need to warn you i've read it like 30 times in the past 7 years). the thing is. most people who say they hate it read the book with the wrong context notion. especially the first book . which is exactly why i give everyone who wants to read it and asks me about it the full trigger warning list and the disclaimer to NOT read the first book as a romance novel. (which is why i get very angry randomly when i remember that audible sorts the first book into the erotica genre which it decidedly isn't imo)

cp being sorted into erotica makes me so mad bc book one is a lot of things but NOT erotica. everything that happens in that book is to show the recipient the worst parts of both the akielon and vetretian cultures and societies and their practices. it introduces the reader the protagonists (well mostly damen but i will talk about that later) and outlines their struggles and motives. so i usually read the first book as something akin to a thriller and/or critique of the society bc nothing that happens in the first book is happy or sweet or erotic or lighthearted or romantic. it's all terrible, terrifying and just plain horror and i feel like that's also what the first book is SUPPOSED to convey.

book 2&3 are where the protagonists and circumstance both change. the protagonists learn and grow BECUASE they're removed from the awful court society and the circumstances they'd been thrown in by intrigues and fate. non of this change in them could've happened if they'd stayed in Arles. it shows the reader that the way they change each other and grow away from their respective cultures is a good thing bc both societies have MASSIVE FLAWS which are highlighted to excess in book one (and which is also commented on in the bonus short stories)

so yes if you read all three books as romance when you first read them i understand why you would've been disturbed by them as everything that happens in the first book is VERY disturbing and massive parts of the second and third book are quite disturbing too. However if one reads it under the prerequisite one would read let's say the hunger games (or any dystopian novel) under i wouldn't say it gets less disturbing but the reader suddenly uncovers a whole other layer of the book.

also i personally think that they get so much better (not in the sense of that it gets less disturbing but more so which makes the story better imo) with every reread bc you know so much more about laurent and his motives and his reactions and why he acts the way he acts whereas the reader now KNOWS the ways in which damen actively misinterprets laurents actions which is SO BRILLIANT bc it shows us that a) damen TRIES and he's a good guy but also that he's an absolutely unreliable narrator bc his experiences were so different from laurents and b) just how much laurent is struggling with the fact that he KNOWS and i love it i reread it SO OFTEN

also sorry this got a little longer than planned oopsie ly have a nice day 🤍

[emiliemaria]

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