#bwr world

[captainmera]

I read In Blood We Rise and thoroughly enjoyed it! Your art is beautiful, the characters are interesting, and the lore of your story is fascinating! So of course I have questions. I'm not trying to ask for any spoilers, and if it doesn't interfere with your narrative plans, I'd love to learn more about the world and the people in it :)

For the Ashdown family curse, does it impact all first daughters of children had by any family member? (i.e. if Jessica and Logan have a daughter, she'd be at risk. Theodore's daughter Isabelle is at risk.) Or does the curse have other restrictions on who is impacted? Such as: only the first daughter of the family heir, only the first daughter born after currently cursed family member passes away, etc.

Do vampire peculiars have any specific powers, abilities, or weaknesses? I'm curious what, if anything, you're using from the common vampire mythos (besides the fangs), since Oliver seems to be a-okay with sunlight, doesn't (have to?) bite, and has to work out and/or do physical labor (I assume?) to be ready for a fight.

Thanks so much for writing and drawing. (I'm a fan of your huntlow stuff too.) I hope you have a lovely day <3

I can't go into too much of that! :) Most of these things will unravel themselves as the story goes onwards!

But! peculiars! I can do that! :D <333

This particular topic wont be covered yet until a few chapters ahead - And it's not plot spoilery, just world-building fun, and I think it'll benefit me a little to give a weeee bit info about peculiars now too, for those interested!

Also the stuff I'll explain here is just basis anyway. :)

that's loose basics for vampires! :D [Read in blood we rise here]

[mongo-the-liensis]

Donut

[sir-qwillian-ferne]

*stares at you with my big ol' eyes*

#2 for BWR Clipsy? :3

ABSO HECKINNLUTELY WE LOVE BWR IN THIS HOUSEHOLF

#2: Angstiest moment

That one time that a kid in the theatre was crushed by a light fixture <3

[comtessezouboff]

Paintings from Buckingham Palace: part II

A retexture by La Comtesse Zouboff — Original Mesh by @thejim07

Spread among 13 occupied and historic royal residences in the United Kingdom, the collection is owned by King Charles III and overseen by the Royal Collection Trust. The British monarch owns some of the collection in right of the Crown and some as a private individual. It is made up of over one million objects, including 7,000 paintings, over 150,000 works on paper, this including 30,000 watercolours and drawings, and about 450,000 photographs, as well as around 700,000 works of art, including tapestries, furniture, ceramics, textiles, carriages, weapons, armour, jewellery, clocks, musical instruments, tableware, plants, manuscripts, books, and sculptures.

Some of the buildings which house the collection, such as Hampton Court Palace, are open to the public and not lived in by the Royal Family, whilst others, such as Windsor Castle, Kensington Palace and the most remarkable of them, Buckingham Palace are both residences and open to the public.

About 3,000 objects are on loan to museums throughout the world, and many others are lent on a temporary basis to exhibitions.

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The second part includes paintings displayed in the Ball Supper Room, the Ballroom, the Ballroom Annexe, the Bow Room, the East Gallery, the Grand Entrance and Marble Hall, the Minister's Landing & Staircase, the Vestibule, the Chinese Dining Room and the Balcony Room.

This set contains 57 paintings and tapestries with the original frame swatches, fully recolourable. They are:

Ball Supper Room (BSR):

Portrait of King George III of the United Kingdom (Benjamin West)

Ballroom (BR):

The Story of Jason: The Battle of the Soldiers born of The Serpent's Teeth (the Gobelins)

The Story of Jason: Medea Departs for Athens after Setting Fire to Corinth (the Gobelins)

Ballroom Annexe (BAX):

The Apotheosis of Prince Octavius (Benjamin West)

Bow Room (BWR):

Portrait of Princess Mary Adelaide of Cambridge (William Corden the Younger)

Portrait of Princess Augusta of Cambridge, Grand Duchess of Mecklenburg-Strelitz (Alexander Melville)

Portrait or George, Duke of Cambridge (William Corden the Younger)

Portrait of Frederick William, Grand Duke of Mecklenburg-Strelitz (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Augusta of Saxe-Weimar, Princess of Prussia, later Queen of Prussia and German Empress (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Prince Leopold, Later Duke of Albany (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Ernest, Prince of Hohenlohe-Langeburg (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Ferdinand of Savoy, Duke of Genoa (Eliseo Sala)

Portrait of Marie Alexandrina of Saxe-Altenburg, Queen Consort of Hanover (Carl Ferdinand Sohn)

Portrait of Leopold, Duke of Brabant, Later Leopold II, King of the Belgians (Nicaise de Keyser)

Portrait of Marie Henriette, Archduchess of Austria and Duchess of Brabant, Later Queen of the Belgians (Nicaise de Keyser)

East Gallery (EG):

Portrait of Leopold I, King of the Belgians (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Victoria, Queen of England in Coronation Robes (Sir George Hayter)

Portrait of Louis-Philippe d'Orléans, King of the French (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Charlotte of Mecklenburg-Strelitz, Consort Queen of England with her Children at Windsor Castle (Benjamin West)

Portrait of Prince Adolphus, later Duke of Cambridge, With Princess Mary and Princess Sophia at Kew (Benjamin West)

The Coronation of Queen Victoria in Westminster Abbey, 28 June, 1838. (Sir George Hayter)

The Christening of Edward, Prince of Wales 25 January, 1842 (Sir George Hayter)

The Marriage of Queen Victoria, 10 February, 1840 (Sir George Hayter)

Portrait of the Royal Family in 1846 (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Queen Victoria and Prince Albert as King Edward III and Queen Philippa of Hainault at the Ball Costumé of 12 May, 1842 (Sir Edwin Landseer)

Grand Entrance and Marble Hall (GEMH):

Portrait of Edward, Duke of Kent (John Hoppner)

Portrait of Ernest I, Duke of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha (George Dawe)

Portrait of Victoria of Saxe-Coburg-Saafeld, Dowager Duchess of Kent (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Albert, Prince Consort of the United Kingdom (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Victoria, Queen Consort of the United Kingdom in State Robes (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Louise d'Orléans, Consort Queen of the Belgians, with her Son Leopold, Duke of Brabant (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Feodora of Leiningen, Princess of Hohenlohe-Langeburg, with her Daughter, Princess Adelheid (Sir George Hayter)

Portrait of George, Prince of Wales, Later King George IV (Mather Byles Brown)

Portrait of Victoire of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha, Duchess of Nemours (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Augustus, Duke of Sussex (Domenico Pellegrini)

Portrait of Leopold I, King of the Belgians (William Corden the Younger)

Minister's Landing and Staircase (MLS):

Portrait of George, Prince of Wales in Garther Robes (John Hoppner)

The Loves of the Gods: The Rape of Europa (the Gobelins)

The Loves of the Gods: The Rape of Proserpine (The Gobelins)

Vestibule (VL):

Portrait of Prince Albert of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha, the Prince Consort (Unknown Artist from the German School)

Portrait of Princess Alice of the United Kingdom, Later Grand Duchess of Hesse (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Princess Helena of the United Kingdom, Later Princess Christian of Schleswig-Holstein (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Princess Louise of the United Kingdom, Later Duchess of Argyll (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Princess Victoria of the United Kingdom, Later Empress Frederick of Germany (Franz Xaver Winterhalter)

Portrait of Victoria Mary of Teck, Duchess of York (Edward Hughes)

Chinese Dining Room or Pavilion Breakfast Room(CDR):

Set of Four Painted Chinoiserie Wall panels I (Robert Jones)

Set of Four Painted Chinoiserie Wall panels II (Robert Jones)

Set of Four Painted Chinoiserie Wall panels III (Robert Jones)

Set of Four Painted Chinoiserie Wall panels IV (Robert Jones)

Balcony Room or Centre Room (BR):

Chinoiserie Painted Panel I (Robert Jones)

Chinoiserie Painted Panel II (Robert Jones)

Chinoiserie Painted Panel III (Robert Jones)

Chinoiserie Painted Panel IV (Robert Jones)

EXTRAS! (E):

I decided to add the rest of the tapestries from the story of Jason (wich hangs in the Grand Reception Room at Windsor Castle) and (with Jim's permission) added the original mesh for paintings number 2,3,4 & 5 from the Vestibule (seen here and here) wich was never published. These items are:

The Story of Jason: Jason Pledges his Faith to Medea (the Gobelins)

The Story of Jason: Jason Marries Glauce, Daughter of Creon, King of Thebes (the Gobelins)

The Story of Jason: The Capture of the Golden Fleece (the Gobelins)

The Story of Jason: The Poisoning of Glauce and Creon by Medea's Magic Robe (the Gobelins)

Sea Melodies (Herbert James Draper) (made by TheJim07)

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Found under decor > paintings for:

500§ (BWR: 1,2,3,4,5,6, & 8 |VL: 1)

570§ (VL: 2,3,4 & 5 |E: 5)

1850§ (GEMH: 1 & 3)

2090§ (GEMH: 2,6,7, 9 & 11)

3560§ (GEMH: 4,5 & 10 |BSR: 1 |EG: 1,2,3,4 & 5 |MLS: 1 |BAX: 1)

3900§ (CDR: 1,2,3 & 4 |BR: 1,2,3 & 4 |EG: 10 |VL: 6 |GEMH: 8)

4470§ (MLS: 2 |E: 1)

6520§ (BR 1 & 2| MLS: 3 |EG: 6,7,8 & 9 |BR: 1 & 2 |E: 2,3 & 4)

Retextured from:

"Saint Mary Magdalene" (BWR: 1,2,3,4,5,6, & 8 |VL: 1) found here.

"Sea Melodies" (VL: 2,3,4 & 5 |E: 5)

"The virgin of the Rosary" (GEMH: 1 & 3) found here.

"Length Portrait of Mrs.D" (GEMH: 4,5 & 10 |BSR: 1 |EG: 1,2,3,4 & 5 |MLS: 1 |BAX: 1) found here

"Portrait of Maria Theresa of Austria and her Son, le Grand Dauphin" (CDR: 1,2,3 & 4 |BR: 1,2,3 & 4 |EG: 10 |VL: 6 |GEMH: 8) found here

"Sacrifice to Jupiter" (MLS: 2 |E: 1) found here

"Vulcan's Forge" (BR 1 & 2| MLS: 3 |EG: 6,7,8 & 9 |BR: 1 & 2 |E: 2,3 & 4) found here

(you can just search for "Buckingham Palace" using the catalog search mod to find the entire set much easier!)

Disclaimer!

Some paintings in the previews look blurry but in the game they're very high definition, it's just because I had to add multiple preview pictures in one picture to be able to upload them all! Also sizes shown in previews are not accurate to the objects' actual sizes in most cases.

Drive

(Sims3pack | Package)

(Useful tags below)

@joojconverts @ts3history @ts3historicalccfinds @deniisu-sims @katsujiiccfinds @gifappels-stuff

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[theiconicmeghanmarkle]

“I got the chance to hear the always inspiring Meghan Markle speak on World Mental Health Day about this very topic. This metaphor she used really resonated and gives me hope we can find safe solutions for future generations.” - Dee Poku, founder of the WIE Suite & BWR

Named one of Marie Claire Magazine’s 50 Women Changing the World, Dee Poku founded The WIE Suite with the goal to create a community that redefines success and how women achieve and experience it—on their own terms and in support of each other. ​ Having formerly held senior roles at Paramount Pictures and Focus Features, Dee pivoted to entrepreneurship when she realized there weren’t enough safe spaces and resources for women to accelerate their careers and learn from each other in a way that was constructive rather than competitive.

[rmd-writes]

Sending an ask for nice ask day!!

Noticed we have a lot of similar fandom interests -- if David, Patrick, Carlos, TK, Alex, and Henry were to meet, where would it happen? who would get along the most outside of the pairing?

hello! What a great ask! I love finding people who share multiple fandoms, so hello new friend!!! 💖

Believe it or not, this is something I’ve thought about previously, so strap in.

A while back @blackandwhiteandrose wrote a fic (about how David and TK were friends (if you love both characters, you should read this fic, it’s so good) back when David still lived in NYC. Having read it and discussed it with BWR later, I wholeheartedly agree that they were friends who lost touch after TK moved to Austin. Not immediately though - you know in s1 of SC how David is always on the phone texting? We know that his NYC friends were mostly assholes, so who was he texting? TK.

TK probably got a new phone or deleted all of his NYC contacts when he moved to Austin, so he lost David’s number then too. But maybe he’s scrolling Instagram one day and comes across Alexis’ account or the Rose Apothecary account, or maybe Nancy is laughing hysterically at Moira’s accidental live stream of the conversation about David’s oopsie-daisy and eventually TK gets back in touch with David. They’re both happy now, really happy. Deeply in love, safe and content with who they are as people, happy.

Patrick suggests that he and David make the trip to Austin and David can catch up with TK while they’re there. (There’s probably some kind of sportsball game Patrick would want to watch, idk).

I’m taking liberties now, but bear with me. While they’re in Austin, they go to a restaurant and there’s a fire. Please go read @missgeevious’s absolutely hysterical fic to find out what happens.

Once Patrick gets over his mortification (it’s short lived, David won’t allow it, there are food trucks to visit and proper bbq to be had), they go with TK and Carlos on a tour of Carlos’ favourite food trucks and end up at Franklin’s BBQ, which David wanted to go to because he read about it in an article about FSOTUS.

Carlos raises a brow at David’s seeming insistence on wearing sweaters in the Texas heat, but he’s glad it’s not actually summer or TK might need to put his paramedic skills to work on his friend. There’s a moment when Carlos catches Patrick’s eye as their respective husbands are chatting loudly and gesticulating wildly and there’s a fond resignation in Patrick’s expression that he recognises. One that says, “sometimes I can’t believe that I chose him but I’m so glad every day that I did.” Carlos feels that way about TK too.

When they make it to Franklin’s the line is long and Carlos notices the presence of private security officers in suits - unusual for somewhere like Franklin’s. The reason for it becomes apparent when they realize that Alex, Henry, Nora and June are ahead of them in line. They’d come to Texas for a long weekend at the lake house. It’s David who recognises them first - Alexis used to have a giant crush on Prince Henry, she’d met him once before at a party on a yacht (Pez dragged Henry to the party), and in the way that only Alexis can, had come home and huffed that Henry must not be interested in women, “because, David, he, like, barely even looked at me and I was wearing that sparkly Balenciaga!” (Little did she know that she was correct. “I knew it!” she proclaimed when news broke of the emails, before she’d gone all teary eyed once the enormity of what had happened to Alex and Henry had hit her).

Turns out that the world is both too big and ridiculously small - Carlos and June had taken a class together at UT, even worked on a group assignment together. When June comes over to say hi to Carlos, they end up all sitting together: David, Patrick, TK, Carlos, Alex, Henry, June and Nora. They share their food and laugh so much and more than one other patron does a double take at the ridiculous level of hotness sitting at their tables.

David gets along surprisingly well with Nora - she reminds both him and Patrick of Stevie, in a way. Carlos and Henry become fast friends and it’s not long before he and Alex are talking in Spanish about their favourite foods as well. David, TK and Alex - in an uncoordinated attack - separately try to steal food off their respective partners’ plates only to be met with loud protests, followed by triumph, because their partners never really say no. There’s laughter when they realise what’s happened simultaneously around the table.

They sit there talking and laughing and eating until they realise that the sunlight is fading and they’ve been there for hours now, simply enjoying the company and revelling in feeling happy, and safe, and free.

[hippolotamus]

Tagged by the always talented @gentoodiaz @spotsandsocks @panbuckley @alyxmastershipper Thank you loves 🥰

No pressure tagging @shortsighted-owl @stereopticons @this-is-bwr @elvensorceress @monsterrae1 @911onabc @buddierights @littlebitofdiaz @chaosandwolves @the-likesofus @megsvstheworld @mysteriouslyyounggalaxy @heartbeatdiaz @jesuisici33 @apothecarose

Here's a new silly domestic lil thing to mark the end of another school year

“Okay,” Buck says, rubbing his hands together and eyeing the kitchen table warily. Chris’s school bag lies in the center, uneven and lumpy with the end of year offerings gathered from his desk and locker and extracurriculars. “Are we doing rock-paper-scissors or old school 1-2-3 not it?”

In his years of helping, Buck’s learned that the bag in question could hold any number of potential horrors. The first time he agreed to join the Diaz Last Day of School clean out — having forgotten his own youthful habits — he had been shocked by the sheer quantity of papers, projects and… miscellaneous items. 

Eddie, knowing what to expect had, of course, let him dive right in with his usual enthusiasm. Buck still refuses to eat grapes after finding a forgotten moldy container among that year’s haul. 

“You don’t wanna thumb wrestle for it?” Eddie glances over from where he’s standing next to Buck with arms folded across his chest. His lips are turned down in an adorable pout that Buck always wants to kiss away. He would right now if it weren’t for their very serious task at hand. 

“Well now, that just wouldn’t be fair. Not with your dainty fingers.”

“Dainty?” Eddie scoffs, then pitches his voice low. “Is that what you were thinking last night? Because I’m pretty sure I heard ‘Eddie, fu—’”

“Eh, eh, eh,” Buck tuts, cutting him off with a kiss. Chris may be older, but he does not need those details if he’s anywhere nearby. 

“Also, fair point,” he concedes. “If you wanna thumb wrestle, be my guest.” 

At that moment, Chris chooses to make himself known, shuffling into the kitchen with a world weary sigh. “You two really are ridiculous.”

He unzips his backpack and unceremoniously pours out its many contents before retreating again. 

Buck raises his eyebrows, strokes his chin and huffs out a laugh. When he turns to face his husband, he discovers Eddie wearing a similarly amused expression. 

“Together?” Buck asks.

Eddie relaxes his shoulders, closes his eyes, shakes his head and exhales a heavy breath. When he opens his eyes again, there’s an unmistakable fondness that Buck has cataloged through their years together, betraying the smirk on his lips. 

“Together.”

[ask-attendant-mansion]

The Arcade Machine

Name: Balloon World Ruin "BWR" Eclipse

Pronouns: They/them

Personality: Skittish, very easy to startle, but just as easy to amuse and entertain. They only want to help, but, their predicament makes their life very fragile.

Likes: Sun, Moon, people, games

Dislikes: Theatre, anything related to theatre, employees

Additional: BWR's code is inside the arcade machine in Sun and Moon's room, Location B.

[red-black-aesthetic-bout]

Round 1: Match 3

Kuga Yuma (World Trigger) vs. Kiki (Kiki's Delivery Service)

Kuga Yuma

- the Supreme Color Scheme (BWR)

Kiki

- my friend and I watched this once and she started crying...unanticipated depths

mod notes: oh my god...babies

[mostlyinthemorning]

Good Vibes Tuesday

I'm in the mood for some positivity this morning, so let's share something that makes you happy about fandom*. It can be anything you like-a person or blog you appreciate, a post that made you laugh, a fic you liked, anything that puts good vibes into the world.

*fandom can be whatever you want it to be

I'll start with a twofer:

-I'm so happy that @noahreids is keeping Noah-a-Day May alive and sharing more of their amazing gifs with us. They're so gorgeous and include so many lesser known moments.

-I love that @goodiecornbread decided to build on the theme and create Em-MAY-ly this year. Emily deserves more love and they've found some excellent photos to share.

What's giving you good vibes today? @rmd-writes @lizzie-bennetdarcy @likerealpeopledo-on-ao3 @noahreids @goodiecornbread @this-is-bwr @missgeevious @weathereyehorizon @carolrain @chelle-68

[captainmera]

Mera, Captain, Laddie, Chap, Chum, You Majestical Swede I am living for your IBWR lore on vampires. I love tidbits on biology and quirks of fictional species, especially when it's given more unusual and creative twists. My investment in your comic has begun to peak, I am precariously standing at the edge of a new hyperfixation and you are daring to push me in with your art and lore. l'II be looking forward to seeing Ollie's lil quirks and other bits of the charming world that lives in your head. Also feasting on your TOH bits, as a lore enthusiast your rambles are so very enjoyable and your connection board is so relatable. A bit curious what hexsquad would be like in the world of IBWR or what peculiars/witches/regulars they'd be. So very glad I clambered onto this ship of yours and get to see some of the bits and bobs going on in your brain- I adore the way you think. Sorry if this was a bit long, I hope you're doing well and will feel better, whatever it may be from <3

*squeaky scream* thank you anon! ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚ <333333

I am having a lot of fun making my story! BWR is only in the baby phases! There's so much fun about this world and it's people, culture and history, that I'm so excited to share with everyone who reads!! :'D <3

IBWR has everything I personally enjoy in a story! This means a lot to me, it's my passion project (and hyperfixation of my own creation) for a reason.

Here's a doodle of Oliver and his buddy Sebastian :)

As for who the hexsquad would be in IBWR! HMMM! :D

HEXSQUAD IBWR AU:

Luz would be someone with a weak fylgja who wants to be a witch anyway! And she'd join a coven to try pursue it. For her, I think her story would be about learning that magic isn't as beautiful as she had hoped, and joins another coven that doesn't do the traditional ways of things. Or perhaps she starts her own.. ;)

Hunter would be a werewolf! :D A beast-type peculiar.

Gus and Willow would be Fae-types. Gus a spriggan, Willow a fairy.

Green fairies "flaws" are envy, I think I could make that work for her! Otherwise I'd put her as a red fairy, the flaw would then be rage. Willow's "fairy gift" would be plants and working with gardening.

Amity would be a regular, I think. Perhaps a wealthy girl who finds herself quietly rebelling against her parents by going with her older siblings to women's rights activism stuff! Possibly that's where she meets Luz! :O

Gus being a Spriggan would mean he's a natural showman, as they're known for their mischievous nature and charisma. I think he'd work in a music hall! :D

Vee would be a fae-type too! But she would be a Huldra/Nymph (skogsrå in swedish). Meaning she can shapeshift into people still! So that fits best.

For IBWR, I take a lot of folklore and put a spin on them with my own interpretations! :)

I like playing with the idea that the folklore and fairy tales are based in half-truths. It's a lot of fun and I've put a lot of thought into it so that they make sense into the world I've built. :D

[mongo-the-liensis]

Look what I can do now

[dailykehlani]

@oliver_vaughn: Wow (pt I). @kehlani’s BWR World Tour just finished its North America leg; two months long, 37 shows, almost 200,000 humans across countless sold-out venues.

Narrative was pivotal in Kehlani's creative approach to this album - so the visuals within this tour had to be incredibly intentional. It was important to all of us that the wardrobe contributed to the story. Through colour palette, texture and silhouette we planned looks to emulate the 4 elements, which is how the show was divided both sonically and visually by animations and lighting. Every look in the tour represented Air, Earth, Fire or Water. I worked closely with dozens of talented emerging designers across the world on custom bespoke pieces to tell our four story themes - whilst meeting practical requirements allowing Kehlani physical flexibility & fluidity to dance like that (if you saw the show, you know.)... I am so proud of how it turned out. Soon I will share some BTS of designing; including sketches, moodboards etc. But for now, here is a tiny snapshot of our

@bluewaterroadtrip wardrobe. Major shoutout to @gc_phoenix, @miaandrephotography + @_718s for capturing the essence of our creations in the most perfect way every night.

@mannequinskin + @hausofshee for creating and understanding so beautifully.

@sophianieser for holding things down on the road & being my hands and eyes exactly as I needed.

@jestina.odell for being amazing and having my band & dancer looks down every night.

Everyone on and behind that stage is SO talented it is mindblowing.

@kehlani - I have no words, this was so damn joyous and special, thank YOU for trusting me... now bring on Europe...

[transhuman-priestess]

If GE Boiling Water Reactors have a million haters, I’m one of them.

If GE BWRs have one hater, I’m THAT ONE

If GE BWRs have no haters, that means I’m dead.

Win or lose

10 meltdowns or no meltdowns

Perfect safety or no safety

I will always hate and oppose you

Even if the whole world stands with you!

DEATH TO BWRs!

[betterwithraptors]

No one you know lives here....

So this orphan blog still lives. Truth be told I've just been a lurker since my last post. I like the lurk life. I DO miss all the lovely tumbls I used to share stupid memes with.

A note to them: you were, and still are, wonderful bright spots in the dumpster fire that is the internet.

I'll get the sad news over with first. My sweet little Icon Girl was put down last year. Having reached the gloriously grumpy age of 20 years, she let me know it was time. That. Sucked.

On to other things.....

This isn't a comeback announcement. No self reinvention. I'm quite happy pouring my creativity into the kiddo. He's fun and funny, and in a very mediocre real life, the most important impact I'll have.

But where does that leave this Happy Grapefruit? Well, in a sort of stagnant place I guess. Hurtling headlong into all the awful trappings of Momhood. Distance from all my old hobbies and activites that "defined" me, or at least made me feel interesting. Isolation from pretty much any friends besides Spouse, who's great. He's my friend, he's my partner......buuuuuuuut. He's not an outside perspective. And with my Kindred person living 3k miles across the map, it makes for some very loud echoes between my ears. (If anyone else's internal monologue is old enough to make a Lou Gehrig /Airplane the movie reference right now, I'll give you a moment)

Introspectively I've learned a lot since the world stopped 4 years ago. Something clicked and the blinders over my upbringing, who my parents are and what really happened flew off faster than a Winnebago at ludicrous speed. No details, save that the story involves a narcissist, an enabler and an emotionally vulnerable kid in the wrong place at the wrong time. Is that a G note I just heard?

Point is it leaves a mess much like one of those "I Spy" books. One big picture filled with 1000 little things and you're looking for the Monopoly shoe and 4 pices of blue string but you're not quite sure why. Meanwhile you're actively learning emotional regulation (trying to) as you teach it (trying to) and establish healthy boundaries that, if I'm honest, look more like an EKG.

And that's it. I don't have a pearl of wisdom. I'm basically holding it together, happy where I can be and sarcastic - funnily, not like biting or bitter - about the rest. We'll see how far that gets us. Maybe to 42.

Wish you tumbls all the best, apparently there's 228 of you and I'm utterly confused why, but grateful all the same.

-BWR

[lennyinlordran]

I built a model nuclear reactor in Lego Worlds and my little brother asked why I don’t build a nuclear reactor in modded Minecraft.

it was very hard for me to refrain from shouting “because the mods don’t let me choose between a BWR and a PWR!”