#by the end im just rambling tbh

[iliterate-cunt]

This is my attempt at a Helluva Boss revamp

Because of course a teen on the net can attempt to write something more compelling than a team of professional writers.

These are my main complaints:

-The "character arcs" are way too quick for my taste. And they are more an exploration thing than a development.

-Blitzø is an asshole that is aware of being such. But more than an asshole: he is annoying. And by the point is shown that he feels bad for being an asshole, and that we should feel bad for him :(((, he already got unbearable. Why is this man the protagonist?

-The series is WAYY too focused on Blitzø, Moxxie and Stolas. To the point that Millie doesn't seem to have a personality of her own, and she is a main character. Hell, the episode about her parents is focused on Moxxie and Blitzø with this new dude.

-The color pallete. The reds are nice. But why only get stuck with red, white, black and mayyyybe yellow? If you made color pallets for the characters, you wouldn't recognize which is which (except Stolas, and mayyyybe Loona, but with Stolas you could confuse him with his family). The better looking episodes are the ones where it looks different enough.

-Consider this an extension of the first point: Blitzø with Stolas. Is way to quick, to the point where you can't pin point when it suddenly turned into something romantic (or at least something more than sexual)

Now. What would I do?

If Blitzø is still the protagonist: the point of the series wouldn't be that they're just hitmen. The point would be that in every adventure they're going, Blitzø slowly realizes that he is actively hurting the ones who he cares, and it culminates in the point when he wants to change. Not a full redemption, he would still be as immoral as any demon, but not as jerky as he was at the beginning. Also if he is doing something minor but shitty it would be at least funny.

But there's also the idea that Moxxie is the protagonist and we see from his point of view more. Then Blitz would become some sort of antagonist that gets some development tht removes that status (based on the idea above). Imagine. A hitman with his wife working on killing people and learning more about his boss. And this version of Moxxie would be more logical, yet has a very poor control of his emotions. Smart, yet gets angry easily. And while the series progresses, we see him actually improving his emotional intelligence. Also even though he is big brain he would explain his ideas badly, which lead to hijinks and that stuff.

With Millie... Let her have a personality besides her husband. Maybe she is more emotionally intelligent than her husband, and also a street smarts sort of gal. Also Millie would be interested in more "vain" stuff, like how cities look, or how humans act, since it's stuff that seems odd to her. This could cause some sort of conflict (that gets resolved in the duration of the show),

And with Loona. Yeah. She would still be a edgelord. Someone who interacts rudely to everyone, even though the rest attempts at being nice to her (if it works or not is another thing). But I would explore more of that. Why is she so rude? We had parts of ONE episode to see that. The fact that she has no friends and was adopted just before she turned 18 is never addressed, just stated and then we never see it again. Maybe we could see more of her trying to befriend other people, yet failing since she doesn't really know how to interact with other people in a positive way. Y'know. Explore her more.

And... The Blitzø x Stolas stuff. Oh boy.

In this version, this starts with the moment Stolas gave Blitzø the grimoire in exchange of sex. Stolas is in a loveless marriage, yet he doesn't have the guts to ask his wife about divorce, mostly because of his daughter (even though she is miserable hearing them fight so badly) and social pressure (of the what will the people think if he divorces and stays with someone who is below him regarding social class), so instead he searches some sort of care with someone without telling his wife, and Blitzø is not the first person who he has attempted to have an affair with, but is the longest affair he had, therefore, he falls in love with . (It's clear in the original series that Stolas and Stella's marriage is miserable, but is not clear why they haven't divorced, even though is implied in episode 8 that they did split up, so I gave them a reason)

So Stolas from the beginning is searching for some sort or romantic -or even platonic- love (he is not as degenerate as the og series, but still has one or two weird moments), but Blitzø is just there for the book and has intercourse because he can have. And the "big moment of truth" that starts the series climax would be the point when they realize the other's feelings: Blitz realizing that Stolas is in love with him, and Stolas realizing that Blitzø is not interested in him for him, and with this, Stolas realizes too that Blitzø is truly a horrible person. And no, they would not magically fix things and end together. They would at best become friends. But the most possible thing is that Stolas shares the grimoire and there's no other situation where they both interact willingly.

Also with Stella and the "wanting to kill Stolas" thing, it would be actually explained. The reasoning behind her plan is that she wants to leave him, but is afraid of what people will think of both her and him, and has come to the conclusion that the route she needs to take is to straight up murder Stolas. Not only she would be done with him forever, but either she or Octavia would take Stolas' place as a "prince of hell".

If we are going with the Blitzø as the protagonist route, then it would be ambiguous (in between the romantic-platonic-sexual attraction limbo) , but with the series progression, it would slowly become less subtle. But with the Moxxie as protagonist, it would be more straight to the point, and Blitz would appear to be oblivious to the romantic advances.

And with the pallete thing, I tried doing something that would make the show less boring to look in the color sense. Still a red dominant palette, but not as much as before

That's all the problems I believe I would resolve. Is semi coherent, so don't be afraid to ask something about it, just don't be a dick asking about it.

Perhaps if something is brought up, I could add this below 👁👁

[luck-of-the-drawings]

"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.

[dizzybizz]

al lsasints steret 🥺

i lvoe alll saints stereettttrahghghhhh

[francy-sketches]

Hiiiii guess who finished her pmv. finally. um enjoy :3

[caluupin]

a doodle that I did a bit ago

[ninesugars]

some stories you’re like. the point was never ever ever the suffering. it was about the love that overcame. you understand

[sunasite]

cw: you give atsumu a handjob, but as friends.....maybe

wc: 653

imagine being going to school with atsumu and you've never had your first kiss.

you're both nearing graduation, and in a few months, you'll be off to college, while he's doing his own volleyball thing. you're in no way disliked in your year, in fact, most people would say they're fond of you. they're comfortable calling you a friend, whether they mean it sincerely or not, but it seemed that's all you ever will be to them.

you're in your last year of high school, and you've never been in a relationship, which in turn means you've never had your first kiss. the dreams of those rom-coms you've seen as a child (and continue to watch to this day) coming to life were all thrown out the window. you thought you've accepted that fact long ago, but two of your closest friends getting into relationships at the same time helped you realize that no, maybe you aren't truly satisfied with how you spent your free time in high school.

instead of being a shut-in, and playing video games all day long, you could have been out and about socializing, and perhaps catching someone's attention (you could have been sitting in a café looking pretty, and drinking a nice, warm cup of coffee, as the cute barista your age comes up to you and tells you shyly that he's interested. but reality isn't that kind.). that certainly sounds more appealing than hitting platinum in your godforsaken video game. being a hopeless romantic and being perpetually single do not go well together— you've learned that the hard way.

most people have silently agreed that they probably will never see each other again, save for the ones coincidentally going to the same colleges. and atsumu, being the silly little guy he is, asked you for one thing before he leaves: a kiss.

"i'm only joking if you want me to be joking," he said, somehow maintaining a calm front. a sheepish smile made its way onto his face, "but if you're down for it, then i'm being entirely serious."

and in your desperation, you said yes. might as well get your first kiss out of the way, right? better now than never, and better him than anyone else. you were comfortable with each other, and you've known him long enough, so why not?

somehow, that ended up with you both agreeing to something... more intimate than a simple goodbye kiss. no, you were not sleeping with him. you think you'll give that chance to your first partner. it's important to know your value, after all.

now, your first kiss was long gone and you've lost count with how many you've exchanged. you're comfortable above him, as he sits upright against the headboard. atsumu's hand guides yours as you pump his cock at a slower pace, wanting to drag it out for a little while, neither of you willing to give in so soon. as your thumb glides over his tip, he lets out a sharp gasp.

"yeah, just like that," he mumbled into your mouth, small whimpers occasionally escaping him. you answer him with a greedy kiss, eager to feel his tongue against yours. his large hand leaves its hold on yours, generously letting you tighten your grip on him, moving quicker than before.

"ah, please... fuck," his eyebrows are knit together, eyes meeting yours as you pull away from the heated kiss, a thin string of spit connecting you. atsumu's eyes are hazy as he looks up at you, his tongue lolling out slightly. his bleach blonde hair is a proper mess, sticking out in every other way. you hear his breathing stutter, accompanying a deep red painting itself on his face.

it's a positively erotic sight, you think, and you need more.

this may not have been the most romantic way to have your first kiss, but it's definitely one to remember.

[pinayelf]

I know fans joke abt how the warden is more competent than the inquisitor bc they did all that w/o much help but the funny thing abt amihan is she actually isn't

she was 20, angry and hated herself and the world, she ended up in the situation she was in bc she was...a petty snitch. she also hates being a grey warden and continues to hate being one through dai - she actually leaves but then decides to search for the cure

for most of the Blight, it was fuck up after fuck up. like I play it so that I have enough ppl to help me fight the archdemon, but in my personal headcanon, she pissed off a lot of potential help (whether it be Circle mages who overheard her saying she was "gonna annul this shit" out of anger, eamon's men who did NOT like her, bhelen who didn't really trust the fact that she knew nothing about politics), left a bad taste in people they came across and picked a fight with anora

which I think makes sense for a 20 year old ill-adjusted young woman who had to learn how to be more selfless. beating the archdemon was pure luck mixed with people just NOT WANTING the Blight to destroy ferelden and realizing joining the fight was the only way to stay alive

amihan does grow, but it's slow, she has to process trauma, understand she hurt people and ruined their lives and to actually experience what it's like being loved (both platonic and romantic)

I tend to not post so much abt how much amihan fucked up and almost let a Blight swallow ferelden bc I tend to feel anxious abt how ppl will receive it but I think it's important to her character and it's fun and interesting for me to play with it in this case

immy is 100% more competent than amihan, in spite of her own flaws, but I love both my messy and my scaredy cat girl all the same

[thats-a-lot-of-cortisol]

I've been chewing on what fears the bg3 characters would be because I do that with almost every piece of media I like now.

Gale is the Beholding (hubris, pursuit of knowledge above all else, his ex can literally see everything he does in/with the Weave). You could make an argument for Desolation b/c of the orb but I think that's secondary. Wyll is the Hunt imo, but the Desolation works for him too- I think his situation is similar to that Hunter we meet whose name I'm forgetting, whose inciting incident has to do with the Dark. I thought the same thing about Karlach but I think she's Desolation instead of Hunt, both aesthetically and because she was actively betrayed and is, you know, dying. Shadowheart is the Dark. Halsin could honestly be the Lonely: he's pretty isolated from the people around him emotionally. An island unto himself etc etc. Lae'zel is the End imo. You'd think she'd be Hunt but End fits into Vlaakith's whole deal (victim of the End, avatar of the Hunt?). Astarion could be either the Buried (since that covers abuse as well, he was literally kept underground/out of the sunlight, etc etc) or the Hunt. I'm a bit undecided there. I don't know enough about Minthara to make a call on her and I don't want to just say Web because of Lolth. Slaughter, maybe? Since that fear covers war. Jaheira and Minsc are Hunt too, I think (there's a lot of Hunt but that comes with the territory when you're adventuring).

Gortash is Web and you cannot convince me otherwise. I think Orin is Slaughter but, honestly, Durge seems more associated with the Extinction to me because of Bhaal's end goal. The Desolation and the Lonely tag-teamed Ketheric's ass but he's an avatar of the End. Dame Aylin is an avatar of the Hunt, victim of the Dark, and Isobel is an avatar of the End a la the main End avatar we see (Oliver? I really need to re-listen...)

There's obviously a lot of overlap and bleed because there always is. I've been wanting to make art based off of this but it's not happening anytime soon so I figured I'd shout about it into the void a bit lol

[yuelaos-codex]

Wedding Ship Meme

link to template by @heyneon

tagging @bbrocklesnar @alexxmason @captmactavish @onehornedbeast @finding-comfort-in-rain @carlosoliveiraa @tao-tgsh @ghastlyrider @captastra and anyone who wants to ✨ no pressure ofc!

Decided to do both ending 2 (my canon) and ending 3 to show how different yet similar the routes are!

++ some rambles/explanations under the cut:

ASCENDANT ENDING

THE PRENUP

this is sending me bc i have this long ass timeline that leads to them signing a prenup:

- astarion ascends, then breaks up with selene bc she didn’t want to become his spawn

- selene comes with karlach and wyll to avernus, but she doesn’t last long (she’s a lover not a fighter 💀) karlach convinces her to go back to faerun. she tells her that she has been on autopilot ever since, and she has not had the time to process the breakup. the constant fighting in the hells was not helping

- hesitantly she goes back to waterdeep, where she learns that she is being summoned back to evereska. she journeys there and gets celebrated as the savior of baldur’s gate. she starts creating songs abt her adventures. somehow, she still felt as an outsider in her family despite getting acknowledgment. she goes back to waterdeep where she feels more at home

- she slowly builds her reputation. the reunion party also happens during this time.

- 3 years pass by. she goes back to baldur’s gate ever since the brain. not as a hero, but as a performer this time 🥳

- they see each other again ever since the party

- zariel arc begins(!) selene recruits astarion (and the gang!) to help defeat zariel. this is where they rebuild their relationship, whatever it was. they make house of hope their homebase

- before the final fight, astarion, desperate and pissed off that selene was not jumping on his advances, propositions (again 😩) to turn her. they get into this massive fight. selene tells him that the only way that they can make this work is to enter a (magical, hell-powered) contract, where he can’t compel her and in return she can’t leave or betray him. astarion, who was planning all along to turn selene into a vampire bride (where he actually can’t compel her) instead of a spawn, agrees to it since the contract was heavily in his favor. BOOM PRENUP. they both sign it. astarion turns her the very same night 💀 they’re basically married at this point

- they defeat zariel yay, slowly take over baldur’s gate while also getting a vacation home in waterdeep while also traveling the world yadda yadda. then they have a wedding despite already being married for years bc why not ✨

THE WEDDING

at this point selene is a very famous singer, and astarion close to becoming the shadow ruler of baldur’s gate. their wedding gets called the wedding of the century— think the royal wedding, imagine the masses crowding on the gates trying to see what’s going on inside 💀 they hold it during the daytime to squash all the rumors of them being vampires. their motif is white and gold, and is heavily influenced by elven culture. selene’s gown’s train is around 20 ft long. their cake is 3 minscs and 8 boos tall. the festivities lasted for DAYS. lots of hedonistic debauchery occurred ehehe

THE SONGS

so i chose songs that had wedding vibes but also toxic when you listen to the lyrics. chemtrails over the county club is about choosing to live in your own safe and comfortable bubble despite the ongoing horrors outside (cue in my snow globe symbolism for them). there’s also this line where it says “it’s never too late, baby, so don’t give up” which makes me feel that there’s still hope in the relationship becoming healthy… eventually 🤡 (i mean, they actually have forever between them). you belong to me is very fitting bc astarion can let her roam the world freely, but ultimately she can’t leave him. (this also aligns with one of the voicelines a!astarion has if tav leaves with karlach to avernus as a spawn— he tells them that he allowed them to go with karlach bc he’s not some “controlling monster”. he could summon tav back beside him if he wanted to.)

SPAWN ENDING

THE WEDDING

as for the spawn ending, at first they want to hold it with just the two of them but then word gets around, and now everyone was excited for the wedding! they didn’t expect so many people would want to congratulate and celebrate with them. imagine 7k+ people wanting to attend 💀💀💀

they hold the wedding reception in the underdark, but made their vows privately under the night sky 🥹😭 MOON AND STAR MOTIF LFG 😭😭😭

THE SONGS

just a quick one: there’s this line in your universe that says “you can thank your stars all you want but, i’ll always be the lucky one” which i think perfectly sums up how he views tav/selene. bc who in their right mind would help a vampire— a monster, let alone give them their blood? only tav/selene. (which also aligns with his voiceline saying “other people don’t have a heart like that. you’re… you. no one is like that.”) ANYWAY ENOUGH RAMBLING THANKS FOR READING 😘

[mediocre-noodle]

the conversations charlie had after the debate were genuinely the most refreshing thing ive seen in so long lmao

like after all the chaos and miscommunication and division between the candidates, we got some genuinely nice and chill discussions about the politics on the server

slime bad and baghera are a trio i never knew i wanted but got do i know i need them now

[jils-things]

i went wandering off in my pokespe gallery and had to relieve how wonderful this scene played out. no kidding

please dont read the tags i got emotional there /lh

[fluffle-writes]

I wanna. Pick them up in my mouth and shake 'em around like a dog obliterating a squeaky toy

[becauseplot]

completely random thought but thinkin about like. how interesting it is that what happened to qcellbit in the war and what he was forced to do to survive traumatized him and still clearly upsets him. like we all know that. but given his interactions with bbh he still feels a sense of nostalgia, referring to them as the "good times" and reminiscing n whatnot. and it could all be a result of the headspace he's in rn, perhaps glorifying his childhood as a means of reinforcing his "i have always been this way" mentality to help justify his violence against the fed workers and/or clinging to the "good" moments he had growing up in an awful environment because that peaceful childhood was stolen from him.

anyway all this is to say. what if even back then, in order to cope, cellbit thought about the wars as a game: hunting alongside bbh, strategizing, taking people out, collecting "loot," upgrading their gear. and when they're the last ones standing, they win! just,, interpreting the "games" part of "hunger games" as a young, scared little cellbit subconsciously putting distance between himself and the horrors he experienced/committed on the daily and trying to motivate himself to keep going by making it a "fun game to play." and how that might affect how he thinks of it now. like on one hand he's probably aware that it was a seriously messed up situation to be dropped into as a kid, on the other hand, he can't deny that he was having fun.

also i do believe that even outside this "it's all just a game" mentality, cellbit and bbh had some pleasant moments that cellbit is still clinging to (and perhaps blowing out of proportion; nostalgia and rose-tinted glasses and all that). cellbit goofing around while setting up camp for the night. bbh looting a cool jacket (or perhaps a sick pair of goggles?) off a body and giving them to a delighted cellbit. cellbit trying to teach bbh some portuguese, bbh teaching cellbit new words in english. cellbit, bored, hanging upside down from a tree by his legs while waiting for bbh to finish looking at the map and call their next move. a flawless double takedown where neither of them broke a sweat and bbh greatly praised cellbit's skills and cellbit smiled for the rest of the day. (are you proud of me? are you proud of me?) a tree branch breaking and falling directly in front of cellbit and cellbit screeching and bbh laughing harder than cellbit has ever heard him laugh before, so much so that he forgets his embarrassment and starts laughing too.

just,,, man. what exactly is cellbit referring to when he brings up "the good times" with bbh. it's so fun to think about.

[deafeninggardenerpanda]

soft leon rights NONEXISTENT but its okay he still looks really good either way (my design for him before i knew he had a design for the samurai novel)

[ablednt]

Granted I have the overall geographical and cultural knowledge of a 4th grader but from what I can tell the nuclear family model really does seem to be a white colonial invention

Different cultures have different approaches but I mainly hear about either large family units where multiple generations support each other and raise their children and grandchildren together or an "it takes a village" approach where children are raised somewhat communally

And I can't really speak on it much or claim that these families were free of abuse or that children aren't often an oppressed group basically everywhere I know of but the way ownership of your children is so engrained into white society is so bizarre

Like once you notice it you can't unnotice it even the most loving well meaning parents don't know what to do about it because everyone is so isolated from their own families and their own communities so you wind up with 1-2 parents who have full legal ownership of their child and are raised in a culture where you don't have personhood until you're 18 and all attempts at self actualization before them are seen as clueless rebellion. Like our culture is so divorced from the concept that a parent is someone who is helping mentor and care for their child so they can thrive as a fellow human being and it's actually so alarming

And ik this problem isn't unique to white and colonized people but it's honestly really soothing to hear about how other cultures approach and view parenting and community as a whole and to internalize it doesn't have to be this way