#cause he's not a boy he's a man! catman.

[bowlofmeat]

this is the ideal Aldrich characterization tbh

[rabid-citrus]

Calmford inhabitants (part one of ??)

Flanelle (co-protagonist with Dots)

A kind, smart and quiet mime boy, born in a family of a french mime and a redhead canadian clown.

Flanelle is an excellent cook, and he likes strawberries more than anything: strawberry ice cream, strawberry jam, chocolate with strawberries… But his absolute favorite is whole strawberries with whipped cream - yum!

He gets his red hair and friendly smile from his mother, and from his father he gets his outstanding flexibility and an ability to create and use invisible objects. All mimes can do that, and Flanelle is no exception! The only problem is, he also inherited his father's frailty…

Dots (co-protagonist with Flanelle)

A peppy, optimistic and energetic chatterbox, tracing her roots back to Шут Гороховый himself, she was born in a family of an aerial gymnast and a ciircus clown from USSR.

Dots absolutely loves catching butterflies and bugs. Her favorite type of butterflies are the ones with eyes on their wings, she admires them to no end. Don't worry, she always sets them free once she's done looking at them.

She inherited her mother's agility, strength and sturdy bones, and her father's contagious laugh and a good sense of humour. All and any scratches and bruises she ever gets heal very fast, and she also can lift up to 100 kilograms! Her uncle was a great circus strongsman, after all.

Gears (resident mechanic and inventor)

A talented but a bit absent-minded handyboy. He was found among some scrap metal by scrap yard workers as a baby. Nobody knows who his parents are, but there are theories that he's a fae child.

Gears can tinker with machinery for hours, sometimes forgetting that he has to eat and sleep. If you bring him any broken mechanism he messed around with in the past, rest assured he will fix it in no time!

Despite his possibly fae origins, Gears is not repelled by cold iron. Even more, he's attracted to it like a magnet. But, despite being a great handyman, he just cannot cook anything to save his life: his cooking turns out tasting bad or just otright inedible. Good thing that he has friends!

Vivienne has a crush on him, but he's too busy tinkering with scrap metal to even notice.

Vivienne (little witchy herb specialist)

A young but very talented witch, Ugorim's beloved granddaughter. She made herself a cozy spot in their house attic, where she does her witch things.

Even though Vivienne is talented, she is still young and inexperienced, so some of her magic is done on accident. One should't look her straight in the eyes, or else she might unintentionally hex you. This is why she wears her hat in such a way it obscures half her face, to prevent accidentally hexing someone.

It's no secret that Vivienne is one quarter fairy on her mom's side. Maybe it's the reason she and Gears get along so well. Vivienne genuinely admires him, even though outside of his field of technology and invention he's mediocre at best. She is a hopeless romantic with a crush, but Gears is too oblivious to even take a hint.

Doctor Pellet (the all-around doctor)

A bit cranky, but very kind and caring metamorphic doctor. He never knew his parents, but loved the people who raised him very much. He's deathly afraid of apples.

Pellet can take on any form, but prefers being a tall blonde man. The only thing he cannot change is his eyes, so he wears glasses - he sees better, and the other people are spared from the many eyed look.

Pellet was raised by a married couple of doctors, so he's been fascinated by medicine and biology since his childhood. He knows a lot about different illnesses and their treatments, and he also keeps a collection of pickled small animals. Don't worry, all exhibits died of natural causes like old age or a disease.

Nova (catman tooth fairy)

An optimistic and a bit air-headed tooth fairy, a dentist by title. He was born and raised in a family of tooth fairies like him, all hereditary dentists (except his uncle, who went to become a hockey player). He's ridiculously afraid of cucumbers and vacuum cleaners.

Nova is like a mix of a bumblebee and a fat cat: bold, gluttonous, lazy, according to all laws of aerodynamics should't fly but flies anyway. Just like any fairy, he has wings, but he rarely uses them - too lazy.

Like any self-respecting tooth fairy, Nova keeps a collection of teeth: baby teeth given to him by kids, teeth knocked out in fights and accidents that he couldn't put back in his clients' mouths, extracted teeth with cavities, etc. But the special place in his hoard is held by wisdom teeth; he jokes that his power grows and strenghtens with every new addition.

Trufelle (the short confectioneer)

A gorgeous confectioneer, a loving wife and a great woman to be around. She is married to Bisquit and keeps a joint bakery and candy shop with him.

Trufelle might be short, but she is very kind and outgoing. She knows every Calmford's residents' preferences in sweets by heart.

When making cakes, Trufelle is the one who makes the creme and decorates, and she knows plenty of sweet recipes, including caramel, chocolate and ice cream.

Biscuit (the soft baker)

A great baker, a loving husband and a very kind man in general. He's married to Trufelle and keeps a joint bakery and candy store with her.

Biscuit is built like a closet: tall, wide-shouldered and angular, but it doesn't stop him from being soft and sweet like a freshly baked bun.

He often helps his wife make cakes, baking the layers for them while she makes the creme, frosting and cake decorations. His baking is unmatched, and his bread is always tasty, soft and light.

[tanookikiss]

Paul’s Birthday

Pairing: Tommy x Paul, Gene x Eric. S

Rating: T

Author’s note: So I’ve had this silly little fluffy idea in my head for about a month. I wasn’t sure if I was going to finish it in time, but I have some awesome friends to thank for that. Thank you @ashestoashesvvi  for offering me valuable art tips and suggestions for this story.

................................................................................................................................

Tommy looked forward to all special occasions. He adored gatherings, celebrating milestones with his loved ones. However, there was one special occasion in particular that the guitarist had been prepping for months: Paul’s birthday.

The Spaceman would be the first to admit his infatuation with The Starchild. Who could blame him? Paul was the whole package; smart, sexy, kind, and talented. The two had spent a lot of time together, bonding over their shared love of painting, and Tommy cherished every minute of it. He adored any chance to be with Paul, really, but there was something special and intimate about their art sessions. He had taught Paul a few tips here and there, and Paul took to it like a natural. 

Paul wasn’t just painting a canvas; he was baring his soul. His radiant smile sent butterflies a flutter throughout Tommy’s stomach when he mixed his paints. There was a childlike wonder that twinkled within those beautiful chocolate eyes as the brush met the canvas ever so delicately. Paul was soft and vulnerable. It was a side of himself that he shields from the world out of fear and that made Tommy sad. Paul was at his most beautiful whenever he could let go and create. And Tommy was determined to help set him free.

As the party guests were busy mingling in Paul’s living room, Tommy was busy setting up his grand gift display in the art studio. Gene and Eric distracted Paul while Tommy meticulously re-arranged the color palette to be perfect. Nothing was too good for his Paul. He smiled as he observed his display.

“Hey Tommy, if you want any cake you better hurry before Gene monopolizes the sweets table,” Eric announced, walking into the studio with a glass of champagne. “Holy shit! How many cans of paint did you buy!?” he exclaimed, nearly spilling his drink all over the floor.

“Seventy-two,” Tommy replied with pride. “All seventy-two colors of Liquitex Professional Acrylic Paint. It took me weeks to get every single color to complete the collection,” he gestured to the colorful pyramid display in the center of the room.

Eric blinked, completely gobsmacked at the impressive rainbow pyramid before him. “Of all the things you could’ve bought Paul, you spent weeks buying various fingerpaints!”

“This is the highest quality acrylic paint on the market. All of the great artists use this brand. It’s in very high demand!” Tommy blurted out, explaining his reasoning to the skeptic drummer.

Eric squinted his eyes. “Oh yeah? What’s so special about it?”

Tommy carefully pulled a red bottle down from the display. He opened the top to show Eric the buttery red consistency inside. “Each color is uniquely formulated to bring out the brilliance and clarity of the individual pigment. It’s perfect for color mixing.”

Eric still couldn’t see what was so great about this overpriced paint. It looked like regular red paint to him, but he knew Tommy went to a lot of trouble to get it for Paul, and he knew how important it was for his friend, so he tried to be as cordial as he could, “Yeah, that red is…very red,” he smiled, patting Tommy on the back. “I’m sure Paul will love it.”

Tommy smiled back at his friend. “Paul is an artistic genius! He only deserves the best.”

Eric scratched his head while observing Paul’s latest painting titled, “Doors Of Perception” in confusion. “Well, I wouldn’t go that far…I mean, this door looks more like a window!”

“I think it looks like a waffle.”

Tommy and Eric turned their heads to see Gene propped outside the door, munching on his cake.

Tommy shook his head. “You guys aren’t looking deep enough into the emotionally charged compositions. It’s Abstract Art. It’s not supposed to be realistic. The colors and shapes represent aesthetic ideas instead of natural forms.”

Gene and Eric gave each other a puzzled look with arched eyebrows before turning their attention back to their supposedly art connoisseur Spaceman.

“Then how do you explain this one?” Gene asked, pointing his fork to a canvas covered in brown smudges with a hint of blue and green along the edges.

Eric chuckled. “Let me guess…it’s supposed to be a window into the troubled soul of a starving artist,” he overdramatically stated, prompting a deep chuckle out of Gene.

Tommy rolled his eyes. “This one is not finished yet. Paul has been working on this piece for days now.”

Eric blinked. “It took him days to just randomly slap some brown, blue and green onto a canvas!?”

Tommy sighed. He honestly had no idea why he bothered trying to explain Abstract Art to these two unappreciative buffoons.

“Tommy? Are you back here?” Paul asked from outside the door.

In a hurry, Tommy put down the red bottle in the middle of the floor and scrambled to the door just before Paul could set foot into the room.

“Hey Paul,” he asked breathlessly, trying his best to block Paul’s view from his surprise.

Paul cocked his head curiously. “There you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you! I thought you left,” he said sadly, twirling a nervous finger around his necklace clasp.

“No! Never! I would never leave you…err… leave the party,” Tommy fumbled, shaking his head. Eric snickered behind him. Tommy resisted the urge to swat at him.

“What are you all doing in my art studio?” Paul asked, noticing Gene and Eric standing behind Tommy.

Before Tommy could speak, Eric blurted out, “Tommy has a surprise for you!”

“Oh!” Paul’s eyes lit up, and there was that joy that Tommy loved so much. “You got me a surprise! You didn’t have to…but I am glad you did,” his grin blossomed into a huge smile, melting Tommy’s heart on the spot.

Paul reached out and grabbed Tommy’s hand, pulling him out of the room. “We’re about to open presents in the living room. I didn’t want to start without you,” he said softly. Tommy blushed and followed Paul’s lead eagerly, ignoring Eric and Gene’s playful taunts the entire way back.

Once inside the living room, everyone gathered around Paul as he opened up his various exquisite gifts from Rolex watches to fine silk bed sheets.

“Alright, this is from Gene,” Paul said, picking up a random present from the table.

“Ha! Oh, this is going to be good,” Eric snorted, smacking his gum loudly. Gene gave Eric a stern look, which the Catman only gave a cheeky smirk in return.

Paul unwrapped the present, only to find a box. He opened the box and saw what looked like a wooden knife block with a knife in it. Paul pulled the knife out, dropping it in horror.

“Ah! What the hell, Gene?”

“What? It’s a Nesmuk! Didn’t you say you wanted one?” Gene crossed his arms and raised his eyebrow.

“Yes, I did, but why the hell is it stained red?” Paul asked in disgust.

Everyone eyed the suspicious red substance all over the knife blade and then looked up at Gene with weirded out expressions.

“What? It’s just strawberry jam. Eric didn’t wash the dishes so I had to use the knife to make a sandwich,” Gene explained casually.

“So, instead of just washing a butter knife yourself you just used the expensive fine German cutting knife?” Eric laughed in between loud gum smacks.

“Uh, yeah, it’s still a utensil!” Gene defended abrasively.

“Well, um, thanks Gene,” Paul said with an obvious forced smile. He then reached for another gift in the pile.

“This one is from Eric,” Paul said, reading the tag.

Eric grinned in excitement as Paul unwrapped his gift.

“It’s a Nick Fouquet hat! By why is it flat?” he pouted, examining the squished black hat with a few dented blue feathers on the side.

“Gene accidentally sat on it,” Eric replied with crossed arms.

Gene merely shrugged as he continued munching on his chocolate cake.

Paul put the hat aside. “We should all head up to my studio. Apparently, Tommy has a marvelous surprise for me that I’m just dying to see,” he grinned at Tommy.

“I wanted to save the best for last,” he whispered in Tommy’s ear, causing the younger man to blush as he led the group up to Paul’s art studio.

Everyone oooh’d and ahhh’d over the beautiful acrylic paint display, but no one was more intrigued than Paul, of course.

“Is this the entire Liquitex Professional Acrylic Paint collection?” Paul asked in awe, circling around the magnificent seventy-two canned pyramid like an excited child on Christmas morning. “You got all of this for me!?”

Tommy couldn’t stop the large grin from spreading across his face even if he wanted to. “Yeah, I sure did.”

Without warning Paul pulled Tommy into a tight loving hug. “Thank you so much, Tommy! I love it!” he cheered, kissing Tommy on the cheek. “He taught me how to paint!” the birthday boy bragged to everyone in the room. Tommy’s cheeks burned hot as he leaned closer into the warm embrace. He wished he could stay in this position with Paul forever.

Breaking away from the hug, Paul still kept his arms around Tommy. “I want to test the colors out on a blank canvas,” he smiled, turning to grab a clean canvas.

As Paul was carrying a large canvas over, Tommy noticed the lone red paint can he had left in the middle of the floor carelessly. Quickly, he rushed over to retrieve the can to prevent Paul from tripping over it, but, unfortunately, Tommy’s foot caught a nearby easel causing him to lose his balance. Everything happened so fast. Before Tommy could get his wits about him, his arms, hands, the floor, and the unfinished painting were covered in red paint.

Surprised gasps filled the room as everyone grew quiet, staring down the clumsy guitarist.

“Nice fall, Grace!” Eric bellowed out loud, breaking the awkward silence.

“Did you have a nice trip?” Gene chimed in, making the already embarrassing situation ten times worse!

Tommy’s face flushed red. “I’m s...so sorry!” He stood up wobbly, looking around for some paper towels. He felt delirious as if he was trapped in some sort of nightmare.

“My painting!” Paul cried out, dropping the new canvas to rush over to inspect the damage done on his precious art work.

That precious glimmer in his eyes had dulled. That beautiful radiant smile had become a frown. That look of disappointment plastered on his face would forever haunt Tommy in his dreams. Several nosy bystanders had snapped out of their trance, rushing over with paper towels to help clean up the mess.

“Paul, I’m sorry,” Tommy’s voice cracked, staring at the other man helplessly.

Paul didn’t even look at him. He just stood motionless, staring at the ruined painting in silence. Tommy couldn’t bear it anymore and rushed off to the nearby bathroom, turning on the water faucet and pumping lots of soap into his hands. With a sad sigh, he scrubbed his hands and arms in the soapy water with fury. He wanted nothing more than to erase the evidence of his great blunder. The bright red paint residue mixed with the white soap had turned into a hideous pinkish color stained onto his skin. Who was he kidding? It would take days for this accursed color to come out. Just another painful daily reminder of how he ruined Paul’s birthday.

Tommy held his head down in shame, feeling completely ashamed and angry at himself for what had happened. He knew Paul had worked hard on that painting. All those relentless hours down the drain and all because of one careless mistake.

Paul knocked on the bathroom door before entering. “Tommy? Are you alright?”

Tommy took a deep breath and faced Paul. “Paul, I’m so sorry I ruined your painting. I just feel awful for what I did.”

“Ruined it?” Paul blinked at him. “You just made it even better.”

Tommy looked over in confusion. He wasn’t expecting that kind of response out of Paul. “What do you mean?”

Paul grinned, putting a plaster tool in Tommy’s hand. “Come on, we both started this, let’s finish it together.”

Tommy followed Paul back into the studio and observed the painting. The red and brown had mixed into a gorgeous burgundy color with hints of blue and green on the edges. The guests were buzzing around the painting like bees to honey, commenting on what a superb color that was. Gene and Eric stood dumbfounded, unable to figure out what everyone was so excited about. Gently, Paul put his hand on Tommy’s hand, guiding the plaster tool onto the canvas. Everyone watched closely as the two men moved like one. In one swift motion they had melded the gorgeous deep reddish colored form into a heart shape.

“Beautiful,” Paul whispered, his eyes surveying the gorgeous masterpiece.

Tommy nodded in agreement. “Beautiful,” he agreed.

Paul looked up to see that Tommy wasn't looking at the painting but at him instead. The two leaned in closer, sharing a gentle kiss.

~There are no mistakes, only happy accidents~ Bob Ross

[thesadisticsiren]

Mighty Nein characters if they were brought via reincarnation:

my prefered options for taste and drama:

(Note, the shape may not last bc of caleb and Veth's hard earned Widogast's Transmogrification), so thats also interesting

Fjord - Human, or Halfelf. I think it'd be interesting for his character to see how... undifferent he'd feel as himself, despite being in the form that most likely the children that bullied him took. Plus I'd love to see him choose to go back to half-orc after. Fuck that insecurity boy!!!

Beau - Tiefling. A red one, like the one she was when first in Xhorhas. She could vibe with jester and depending on the kind if teifling could have some cool magic effects which she mayyyy be hesitant to give it up to go back to human. ALso I think she'd be really hot (shes already hot ofc but yaknow) and also thats mad aesthetic don't @ me

Caleb - I think a race thats not common in the empire would be fun for him... and also strange. But also Tabaxi because cat man becomes catman lol. Whatever he changed into tho would be good to help the assembly not find him. Has a minor version of the kick he gets out of polymorph- hes still got all his brains but hes not... quite? Himself. And thats sadly comforting. Would probably be in no rush to change back.

Veth - hesitant to choose any bc she woRKED to be a halfling she deserves to stay that way... but also her as a medium sized creature to see how that would work with everyone else in the party. EspECIALLY a halforc or a human. Yezas reaction would be thr best part no matter what. Would likely wish to turn back quickly.

Jester - Ahhh the blue darling... I like to think the chaoticness to her would give some more... wild options! Like oh my god.. Blue dragonborn? A scourge aasimar makes holding in her emotions like she does... complicated? I think jester would have fun running around causing chaos, but would eventually wanna turn back really bad.

Caduceus- Hes perfect I don't want him to change I love him... but maybe a triton so the ocean stops being horrible to him so much... also like a very chill dragonborn. Tho maybe teifling? Like a grey and pink teifling has vibes... he'd likely be pretty calm but wants to turn back vERY badly.

Yasha - my queen... oh my gOD what if she became a halfling or a gnome.... chibi yasha... wait dragonborn yasha... nothing is good enough for her.... tbh i don't think she'd care too much, at least not outwardly.

[dadspeed-appreciationsquad]

How Do I Tell Your Dad?

Set after the season 2 finale, but more when everything's settled I suppose. Gary struggles with the fact that he adopted Little Cato and now Little Cato's actual Dad his standing right here.

"Gary?" Avocato walked into Gary's room and found him sitting up on his bed with his legs laying flat and crossed, bouncing a ball off the wall across from him. He stopped once he saw Avocato standing at the door and smiled brightly.

"Avocato! How's it going man?"

"Mind if we talk?" Gary's smile faltered slightly.

"Of course! What's going on in that noggin of yours?" Gary tried to act natural, but Avocato could tell he was tense.

"I wanted to ask you about Little Cato. I've been gone so long, I want to know about everything that happened with him." He paused. "And with you too." Gary sighed and looked towards the ground with a small smile on his face. He looked back towards Avocato and patted the bed. Avocato smiled and finally walked into the room and sat next to Gary.

"Well, surprisingly eventful, but mainly, it's been hard." Gary pursued his lips. "I'm not gonna lie, we missed you Avocato." Gary moved so he was sitting side by side with Avocato, his feet planted firmly on ground.

"So much has happened since you, well, you know, died." Gary coughed. "I honestly didn't think I would be able to care for Little Cato. I mean, I'm not exactly the most sane person to entrust with a kid." Avocato laughed and patted Gary's knee.

"I trust you. Isn't that enough?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Gary leaned his elbows in his knees. "Well Little Cato wasn't," Gary paused and tilted his head back and forth, trying to think of a word to describe what happened, "he was hurt. He just got you back, only to lose you again. It took me awhile to actually get him to talk. But when I did, he told me he wanted to kill the Lord Commander." Avocato sighed.

"That's my boy alright. You told him no though, right?" Gary's eyes widened and he laughed nervously.

"Of course I did. But actually I told him that we totally could get revenge." Avocato glared at him. "What! I already informed you that I am in no way "parent material"."

"Continue." Gary nodded.

"Right so we almost die." Avocato glared harder.

"BUT! We didn't, obviously, and Little Cato ends up trusting me, I think he started to at least. Well at the very least he was talking." Avocato let out a nervous laugh.

"What else should I have expected from you. You agreed to go on a suicide mission with me when you just met me." Gary smiled.

"We clasped hands! It was like, destiny or something." Avocato bumped his shoulder.

"So Little Cato trusts you, are you guys friends?" Gary laughed.

"Friends? Well actually I ad-" Gary paused when he realized what he was about to say. He was going to tell Little Cato's FATHER that he adopted his boy, REPLACED HIM basically, and not too long after they had brought him back to life?

"Gary? What's wrong?" Avocato leaned down to get a better look at Gary's face. Gary flushed and scooted back on the bed.

"Haha..ha, BEST friends. That's what we are. Yeah, totally." He laughed nervously. Avocato narrowed his eyes and sighed.

"Well I'm glad. He got to see the good side of you that I saw." Gary nodded.

"I guess you can call it that." Avocato stood and stretched out the kinks in his back.

"You can fill me in more tomorrow. You seem tired." Gary looked around the room, avoiding Avocatos gaze.

"Yeah. Tired. That's what we'll call it." Gary gave a tense smile, "I'll see you later." Avocato nodded and left the room. Gary's smile faltered and he dropped his head into his hands the second Avocato left.

"Oh my crap".

Gary did not see Avocato later.

Gary actually avoided Avocato at all costs.

Which was actually really hard, being that they're on a ship with very little hiding spots.

Currently, he was hiding in Little Cato's room, who wasn't unhappy he was there, but was definitely annoyed.

"Gary."

"Yes, SpiderCat?"

"You need to leave."

"Now why on Earth would I do that? I am having the time of my life, right here. Wasting away and hiding from my problems." Little Cato rolled his eyes.

"Cause you need to talk to my Dad. I don't know what's happening with you, but he's been all mopey, and the fact that you're hiding in here tells me that you're the cause of that." Little Cato sighed and layed down on his bed, looking up at the ceiling.

"So talk to me Thunder Bandit. What's got you acting so weird?" Gary sighed and bit his lip.

"I adopted you." Little Cato nodded.

"Right, I was there."

"How do I tell your ACTUAL Dad that? 'Hey, so I know you were dead, then we brought you back only for you to be possessed. But I actually adopted your boy, betrayed your trust and totally accept if you want to throw me off the ship?" Little Cato coughed.

"Well I don't think he'd be that upset." Gary sighed.

"He might kick the crap out of you." Gary sat up and glared at Little Cato, who only proceeded to laugh.

"I'm kidding. Gary, you're my dad's best friend. He'd be fine with it. I mean, it's not like you're trying to replace him or anything." Gary nodded and sighed.

"I guess I should go be an adult and tell him huh?"

"Yeah, but you can stay here for a little longer if you want." Gary smiled and pet Little Cato's hair.

"Thanks, but if I do that I really will lose my courage." Gary stood and left the room with a confident stride. Little Cato rolled his eyes.

"What idiots."

"Just, knock you idiot man. It's that easy. Just raise your fist and bang it against the door. That sounds strangely sexual, hey! Don't get distracted Gary. Just go in there and talk to him." Gary paced outside Avocatos room and sucked in a breath of air before raising his fist. Just as he did, the door opened.

"Gary? Hey man, I haven't seen you around for a bit." Gary blushed and nodded. Neither spoke as they just stared at each other for a few moments.

"Uh, want to come in?" Avocato gestured towards his room and tilted his head. Gary nodded again and followed Avocato in the room.

"Take a seat." Gary sat on the bed while Avocato took a spare chair, sitting so the back of the chair was pressed against his front.

"Now, I guess you're here to talk about why you've been avoiding me?" Gary's eyes widened and he let out a nervous laugh.

"Wh-what would give you that idea? What if I just was busy?"

"You literally screamed when you saw me earlier."

"Crap. Uh, well then, yeah I guess I'm here to talk about that." Avocato nodded and leaned his elbow on the chair and placed his head in his hand.

"Well, I'm all ears." Gary nodded.

"Right so, uh, yeah. Haha, Little Cato, great kid am I right?" Avocato nodded and just stared at Gary. Gary was kinda hoping he'd respond to that. He coughed the awkwardness out of his throat.

"Well, turns out he's sooo great, I just, you know, happened to, you know?" Gary gestured with his hands, hoping Avocato would just get it. Instead, he just raised and eyebrow. "IkindaadoptedLittleCatoandhesometimescallsmeDadwhichisreallynicebutnotwhenhisactualdadisheresoitskindaawkwardimsorry."

"You…" Avocato's shoulders tensed and he leaned back slightly. Gary flinched. "Adopted Little Cato?" Gary bit his lip and nodded. Avocato sighed and pinched the area between his brows.

"This is what you were avoiding me about?" Gary nodded again.

"Did you think I'd be upset?"

"Why wouldn't you be? It probably feels like I tried to replace you and I-"

"Baby," Avocato placed his hand on Gary's shoulder, Gary shut up quickly and stared at Avocato. "I asked you to look after Little Cato."

"Yeah but-"

"And you came back for me. You saved me Gary. If you wanted to 'replace' me as Little Cato's Dad, it wouldn't be the best idea to save his biological Dad, would it?" Gary shook his head and looked down. Avocato stood up and sat next to Gary, once against placing his hand on Gary's shoulder.

"I couldn't have asked for anything more than that. My son, as traumatized as he probably is, accepted and trusted you enough to make you a part of his family? How could I be upset with that?" Avocato laughed and smiled at Gary before pulling him into a hug.

"Thank you, for taking care of him when I couldn't." Gary froze before hugging Avocato back tightly.

"Thanks Avocato. I couldn't have asked for a better friend."

"I know." Gary laughed as they pulled away.

"I guess I was acting a bit stupid."

"A bit?" Avocato raised an eyebrow and Gary rolled his eyes.

"Yes, a bit." Avocato laughed, rolled his shoulders and cracked his knuckles.

"Now, what do you say we play a round of cards? I'm sure you're rusty after not having me around to play with."

"I'm rusty? Oh you're on Catman." Avocato smiled as Gary ran out of the room to get his cards. He sighed and looked up.

"Do you plan on staying there or showing yourself?" Little Cato dropped from the vent and smiled.

"How'd you know I was there?" Avocato laughed.

"I'm your father. I always know." Little Cato crossed his arms. "What were you doing spying on us?"

"Snooping, I thought that was pretty obvious." Little Cato tapped his fingers against his forearms.

"Well, when are you gonna tell him?" Little Cato smiled and leaned against his dad. Avocato patted his head and smiled.

"Soon enough."

[tfw-no-tennis]

hhhhhhxh

more abt hxh bc my last post was too long n i had to split it off holla

so i left off talking abt when gon woke up....i love how polite gon is to pretty much everyone - hes such a good lad all the time. s/o to his aunt for raising him right (tho i think hes also just a rlly good boy inherently too)

also is he named gon bc ging was like ha ha im boutta be GONe lol seeya kid!!!! like ????

i find it interesting that kurapika and hisoka fought....we really havent seen them interact at all yet. also hisoka is so smirk-y i hate that bitch...what did he say to kurapika?????? 

this poor red shirt old guy lmao hisoka is SO clearly uninterested in fighting him and then he fucking dies. rip mdude

what did hisoka whisper to HIM??? guess we’ll never know #RIPLegend

oh mannnn if killua had just won against pokkle then he wouldnt have had to deal with illumi doing That to him :( my smug son......

leorio is such a good dude....also its so funny to me how tall and lanky leorio is, espec compared to the other 3 main characters lmaoooo

or maybe those 3 are just rlly short??? i mean gon and killua are literally 12, but whats kurapikas excuse

GODDDD I HATE THIS BIIIIITCH. FUCK OFFFFFFF tho the evil piano music slaps. but jeeeeesus illumi is so creepy and awful, and seeing him take off his disguise is not any better a second time...he and hisoka truly deserve each other wrow

does illumi have hair powers??? cause it kinda looks like it. or maybe hes just gay and dramatic 

ok but the sick electric guitar riff (?) that played when illumis face was revealed was lowkey kinda hilarious

man i was so wrong abt killua knowing that that was illumi :( poor kid

killua is immediately freaking out and meanwhile illumi looks bored as hell. dude ur the worst 

killua: [freaking out] illumi, completely blank-faced: hey 

I HATE HIMMMM even tho his catman design is regrettably kinda cute

why do illumi and hisoka both have such snatched waists i hate this

wtf so killua has another different brother??? i assumed he attacked illumi....how many fuckgin zoldyk sibling are there?????

leorio ur too normie for this conversation lmao. also wow fucked up family huh

killua looks so like...small and helpless, which is so at odds from what we’ve seen of him so far :( this poor kid

illumi totally has some weird brain powers man callin it now 

gon: wow killuas family sounds wack...  satotz: oh lmao you havent even heard the rest 

KILLUA ;_; 

this poor baby assassin :( :( :(

IMMM INCONSOLABLE. HE WANTS TO BE FRIENDS W/GON.......ARE YOU KIDDING....AUGHHHHHHHH

meanwhile gon decided he and killua are BEST FRIENDS like 10 mins after they met. GOD 

like in the recap ep he called killua his best friend ;_; and meanwhile killua doesnt even think they ARE friends god destroy me 

this calming classical music is throwing me off vbhjfjhbsdkgndks

i sense that leorio and kurapika are rapidly acquiring a new son

DAMN THIS IS SO FUUUUCKEDDDDD illumi is such a crusty bitch wow. leave killua alone asshole 

all that stuff abt killua like, only thinking he wants to befriend gon but really wanting to kill him....that sure sounds like some ‘worst fears’ type of shit for someone like killua....illumi is such a classic abuser wow

i have 2 know is satotz like, repeating this entire conversation verbatim in a calming monotone to gon rn. like....

LEORIOOOOO I LOVE UUUUUUUU AUGHHHH him telling killua it doesnt matter if illumi is his brother, fuck that guy, beat him up as usual and leave.....ooooughhhh leorio is such a good dude ;_; 

and the OF COURSE him saying the obvious - that gon and killua are ALREADY friends....i love this, i feel like leorio said all the exact things the audience is thinking...yet it still didnt get thru to killua bc hes so rattled by illumi appearing, and the abuse in general 

i think if gon were there things wouldve gone much differently 

of COURSE crusty bitch illumi is like oh ok now i have to kill gon.....biiiiitch i hate uuuuu 

also that just shows that hes lying to killua (which we already knew obvs), bc if it were inevitable that killua would kill gon to like, test himself or w/e, then why not just wait for that to happen? that would have a much bigger impact on killua than illumi killing gon....its obvious that illumi is just manipulating him, but killua is too BSOD to be able to tell (also, hes 12)

ok bitch illumi is preaching abt not needing friends but he and hisoka are definitely fucking and theyve been teamed up for the entire hunter exam it seems.....what a hypocrite. hate this guy

god im so glad we didnt rlly get to see whatever the fuck illumi did to that random hunter examiner guy’s face. jeeeeesus. also i cant tell but i wonder if him forcing that info out of the guy was the result of his freaky mind powers or if the guy was just like oof ouch pins in me face

LEORIO AND KURAPIKAAAA THE PROTECT GON SQUAD!! and joined by new member hanzo!!! who ironically beat gon up for 3 hours str8 like, a very short amount of time ago lmao. but still i love that sm

illumi u dumb bitch.....tho i dont buy for a minute that he didnt already realize that killing gon would disqualify him...he defs just wanted to get under killuas skin even more :^( 

KILLUAAAA ;_; when he goes to step back from illumi but illumi tells him not to....ughhh HATE this guy, leave this poor kid alone. no wonder he wanted to leave

illumi saying theres only 1 way that killua can stop him - does he mean by killing him, or something more specific, like some forbidden zoldyk murder technique? 

‘your beloved gon’ wow gay. theyre 12 and theyre dating ok. killua is literally that kid whos like wow i wonder if gon likes me...and meanwhile gon is like wow cant believe me and killua have been dating for 3 months now

leorio saying ‘we wont let him kill you or gon’ ;_; leorio ily sm...thats like the exact right thing to say - hes offering protection and reassurance as an adult figure...unfortunately killua is clearly too freaked out to even process anything outside of illumis gaslighting and abuse 

also illumi is defs doing something to killua w/his eyes via his freaky mind powers. js

illumi i hate you stop being weirdly cute. augh 

classic abuse tactics, being like ha ha nvm i wasnt gonna kill gon! jk!

killua just shutting down completely after that :( :( noooo

and then he kills that old guy and leaves, ‘proving’ that illumi is right....noooooOOOO

and now we boutta see gon go FULL shounen protag for the first time, oh FUCKKKKKK yesssss

this is the first time we’ve seen gon angry oooh man and of COURSE its on killuas behalf,....im so fuckign emo already looooord

god ok the episode preview where its gon saying ‘do leorio and i look alike?’ YES U DO LOL youre father and son so jot that down 

oof, gon and illumi have such fundamentally different POVs on like, family and life and morals, and you can tell by their 4-line exchange before gon does the ICONIC one-handed grab’n’fling

AUGHHHH gon saying hes gonna rescue killua....SO good...he recognizes that killuas family is wack as hell and killua shouldnt be w/them - the classic ingrained ‘found family is more important than blood family’ stuff

tho thats an interesting contrast to gon himself, whos looking for his deadbeat dad

‘but it wasnt his choice’ that so good ily gon BEST boy, hes so perceptive and good......he knows that killuas hand was forced and that he needs to be RESCUED (love that word choice) from his shitty abusive family

of course kurapika and leorio voiced complaints ;_; best parents 

kurapika should be a lawyer tbh 

leorioooo ;_; such a good dude, saying he should be disqualified instead 

HOW is leorio a stronger combatant than that old dude hvbajufjbsja that guy had some moves it seemed, and leorio has,....a knife? a briefcase? the classic premed attitude of ‘fuck it, i could die anytime, lets do this’? like.....cmon vhabjdfjbhsf i refuse to believe this man is of any use in a fight. ill believe it when i see it

pokkle pls ur not plot-important enough to be jumping into this convo rn

tho i am curious abt what hisoka said to kurapika. tho i agree that thats irrelevant to the discussion 

gon repeating satotz’s wisdom :’) and saying that killua will definitely pass if he takes the exam again...ough

gon is SO GOOD i cant get over it !!!!!!!!! AUGHHHH....recusing killua from his abusive family and making it so killua never has to see them again is like...so good. what a good good perfect boy.

also thats like, the perfect response to this. killing illumi would just start a ton of drama, and killua would be conflicted abt that....but removing killua from his situation is perfect 

ok ive ranted a lot ill talk abt the rest later woohoo

PREDICTIONS: 

i predict that hisoka will show up in this upcoming zoldyk arc somewhere bc illumis gonna be in it (i assume) and theyre dating. also hisoka is a central character so itd make sense for him to show up in the second major arc. tho tbh this could end up being completely false and i wouldnt be that shocked lmao

i think leorio is gonna get Big Sad someday bc hes like, so normal compared to the other MCs, and also hes suuuuch a bleeding heart (i love him....) so i feel like thats gonna lead to some sadness for him once his friends start doing crazy shit or w/e 

also i predict that if he gets nen itll be like healing nen or st. does that even exist??? idk jack shit abt nen lmao 

i think that illumi has hypnosis powers or something, even just based on design alone. it could defs be for aesthetic (character design in hxh is wild), but his eyes look noticeably different from any other characters. also he was doing some freaky shit to killua. also i held this prediction before seeing the part where this is brought up so we’ll see if its right lmao 

as for this upcoming arc -  ruth and i are wondering if itll be similar to the vinsmoke drama in one piece - character goes back to abusive family, squad goes to rescue them...and then character refuses to be recused. w/sanji it was partially bc the vinsmokes threatened to kill zeff, his TRUE dad, but i predict in this case it could be more like the zoldyks saying ‘look killua these 3 weirdos showed up looking for you, convince them to leave or we’ll kill them’ and killua will be like, oh shit bc like.....think abt it. the vinsmokes targeted zeff (and not the strawhats) bc they knew they could easily kill him. same goes here, i assume - a family of trained assassins vs Good Good Fishing Rod Smell-Power Boy (who hasnt thrown a single punch yet), Lanky Dr Man With A Switchblade We Havent Seen Him Use Onscreen, and Mx 2 Wooden Sticks, Bloodlust, and Arachnophobia - 3 For 1 Deal! its a no-contest. so thats one thing i could see happening, potentially 

im way too tired to remember my other predictions rip lmao

[mxliv-oftheendless]

Black Dahlia (Chapter 1)

-blows trumpet- Bum-ba-da-dum-bum-bum-BAH! Here it is, the main story of the Black Dahlia series! I am honestly so proud of myself, because I waited until I had it all written out before I posted it; it took me ALL DAMN SUMMER, but it’s finally done! I know it’s basically Scooby Doo and KISS: Rock N Roll Mystery with an added character, but I’ve taken the time to flesh out Black Dahlia’s character a bit. Hope you enjoy! 

She could hear the flowers as she filled up her watering can. They didn’t have a voice in the traditional sense, in that they formed words, but they had a voice of sorts, and that was what she heard.

“It’s all right,” she said aloud as she turned off the water. “I’m coming,”

She knew they couldn’t hear her. Once upon a time, they could… but not anymore. She couldn’t hear them as well, either. Once she could hear them as plainly as she heard everyone else. But as time passed, and as she aged, the voices faded, until they were only a faint whisper.

She went around her house, watering the various plants. Along the way she passed her radio, which had beside it a whole shelf lined with CDs. She paused at her shelf, smiling fondly at her music collection. Earth definitely had produced many amazing rock bands. They all reminded her of the music of home.

She was just finishing when the doorbell rang. She put down her watering can, went to the door, and opened it. Standing on her front porch were four young adults and a Great Dane. 

“Hey, Aunt Heather!” Fred greeted her. 

Heather McMann smiled. “Well, if it isn’t my favorite nephew!”

“I’m your only nephew,” Fred reminded her, still grinning. They did this exchange whenever they met.

“Exactly. C’mere, you!”

Heather hugged Fred tightly, then turned to the others. “Hey, kids. And hello, Scooby,”

“Hi, Miss McMann,” Velma said respectfully. “It’s great to see you,”

Heather shook her head as she ushered them inside. “Velma, what have I said about calling me ‘Miss McMann’?”

“Like, that it makes you feel old,” Shaggy piped up helpfully.

“Reah, rold,” Scooby agreed.

Heather pointed at them and nodded. “Exactly,”

“Well, you look great,” Daphne interjected. The redhead looked to be in an exceptionally good mood today.

Heather grinned and flicked a lock of her long blonde hair over her shoulder. “Of course I do, honey,” 

Once the gang had settled down at her kitchen table with drinks, and Shaggy and Scooby had raided her fridge (she made a mental note to go grocery shopping soon), Heather popped open her can of Lacroix and asked, “So, to what do I owe the pleasure of a visit from my favorite nephew and his friends?”

“Well—” Fred began, but Daphne interrupted, so excited her words came out in a rush.

“WegotacallfromKISSWorldtocomesolveamysteryandwewantedtoknowifyou’dcomewithus!”

Heather paused and looked at her, raising an eyebrow. “… Run that by me again? And slower, please,”

Daphne took a sip of her drink to calm herself, then repeated what she said. “We got a call from KISS World to come solve a mystery, and we wanted to know if you would come with us,”

Heather tilted her head curiously. “KISS World?”

Velma shrugged. “Apparently, KISS has an entire theme park,”

“Oh, I know, Velma,” She had heard about it when it opened, but had never conjured up the guts to go. It was probably overpriced, anyway. “But I didn’t think there would be any problems at KISS World. Aren’t they having a Halloween concert there?”

She never dared venture out of her house on Halloween. Not when a certain being could show up…

Daphne nodded. “Yeah, they are. That’s why they called us. If we don’t solve the mystery, the concert could be canceled!”

Heather raised her eyebrows. “Now that is a catastrophe,” she agreed. She hated it as much as anyone when a rock concert had to be canceled. But she had the feeling Daphne was a bit more concerned about a KISS concert being canceled. “So you’re going, I’m guessing?”

Shaggy swallowed the bite of his snack and nodded. “Like, yeah, of course we are! It’s KISS, man! What more reason do ya need?”

Heather smiled and toasted him with her can. “Too true, my man. But why do you want me to come along with you?”

“Well, you do love KISS,” Velma reasoned. “A lot. Why do you love them so much, anyway?”

That was the question, wasn’t it? Heather glanced over at her CDs, most of which were indeed KISS albums. Her smile turned wistful for a moment. Then she shrugged. “I just do, Velma. But you still haven’t answered my question.”

“Well…” Fred said sheepishly. “… You’ve only left your house on Halloween once, and that was to take me trick-or-treating when I was ten. And we haven’t hung out in a while, plus you said a while ago it’s been ages since you’ve been to a rock concert. I just thought maybe, you could come with us, and after we solve the mystery, we could all go to the concert?”

Heather stared at him for a second. Then she smiled. Fred may have been a little odd with his obsession with traps and horrible acapella bands, but dang if he wasn’t the sweetest. He got it from his mother. “Aw, Freddy!” she cooed, reaching out to ruffle his hair. “That’s so sweet of you!”

“So you’ll go?” Shaggy asked eagerly.

Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to go somewhere on Halloween, just once. Maybe it would turn out okay. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

The gang cheered, and Heather laughed.

Maybe it would turn out okay…

-KISSTERIA-

And that was how Heather McMann found herself sitting with Shaggy and Scooby in the back of the Mystery Machine as it rolled down the highway, with a black box of green face paint and a brush in her hands.

“Okay, Scooby, you ready?”

Scooby nodded happily. “Ruh-huh!”

“Okay, hold still,”

Heather dipped her brush into the green paint and began to paint the area around Scooby’s eyes green. The whole gang, except for Fred, had decided to dress up as KISS; Daphne was Starchild, Shaggy was Demon, Velma was Spaceman, and Scooby, in the funniest twist of irony, was Catman. Fred flat-out refused to dress up, saying he didn’t want to look stupid. Heather had refused as well, and currently wore her very ordinary outfit of black Converse, white washed jeans, a plain red shirt and her favorite black leather jacket. As usual, her pendant shaped like a black dahlia flower hung around her neck.

“Daphne, sweetie, you sure you don’t want me to draw the star?” Heather called.

“No thanks, I’m good,” Daphne replied, and returned to sketching the outline of a star over her right eye.

“Like, I can’t believe we get to go to KISS World!” Shaggy exclaimed excitedly as Heather finished on Scooby’s face. He gave her a lick on the cheek in thanks.

“And solve a mystery,” Velma added. “That’s like killing two birds with one stone!”

Scooby popped up, eager to show off his finished makeup. “Reah! Or two birds rith one cat!”

Heather laughed as she moved up to sit with Velma in the backseat. “It’s awesome to see you guys so excited,”

“Like, you look excited, too, Heather,” Shaggy commented.

Heather kept smiling. If she were to be honest, she was excited. She hadn’t left her house on Halloween in years, and now here she was, going to see the boys in concert. Almost exactly like the good old days…

“Personally, I find their sideshow act a little juvenile,” Velma stated. “But my mother told me to take a more active role in my friends’ interests.” She shrugged sheepishly at Heather. “Sorry, Heather.”

Heather shook her head. “It’s fine, Velma. We’re all interested in different things.”

“Well, I’m pretty interested in Starchild,” Daphne piped up. Her star was almost completely colored in. “He’s so dreamy,” she sighed as she went back to painting.

Heather saw Fred’s head turn slightly to glance at her, then he jerked the steering wheel to the left. The van immediately swerved left, throwing them all to the side, and causing Daphne’s brush to jerk away, leaving a black streak across her face.

“Hey!” Daphne protested.

“Sorry, everyone,” Fred apologized, though he didn’t sound sincere.

Daphne pointed her finger accusingly at him. “You did that on purpose!”

Shaggy looked at her black streak and laughed. “Like now it looks like a shooting star. Make a wish, Scoob!”

“Uh, I wish I was eating a Scooby Snack!” Scooby said cheerfully.

“Good one, dude. Uh, I wish I could breathe fire like the Demon!” Shaggy stuck out his tongue and pretended to breathe fire.

Amused, Heather put a finger to her cheek and played along. “Hmm… I wish my bluebells would listen when I tell them to grow. They’ve been real stubborn lately.”

“I wish you’d all come to your senses,” Fred said to them. “You don’t see me acting ridiculous over my favorite group, the Ascot Five, do you?” He reached into the glove compartment and took out a CD, showing five men wearing white shirts and ascots smiling cheesy smiles.

Heather rolled her eyes at her nephew as he loaded the CD into the CD player. He was literally dressed the same way as the guy in the center.

“Oh noooooo, don’t tug my ascot. Don’t tug my ascot (it’s not a scarf, no baby). You can’t have my ascot ‘cause girl, it’s mine.”

Shaggy and Scooby stuck out their tongues in disgust, while Heather’s face scrunched up as she tried to hide her disgust.  How can my own nephew like such a lame band?

Luckily, Daphne ejected the disc. “Fred, please,”

“I’m just saying,” Fred insisted, “I think they’re twice the band KISS is!”

“Fred, they’re a lame do-wop band from the sixties,” Heather deadpanned.

“Yeah, and do the Ascot Five have an awesome amusement park?” Shaggy asked pointedly.

“Reah, rawesome amusement park!” Scooby agreed.

“Quit being so stupid, Fred,” Daphne said snappishly to him.

“I am not being stupid!”

“Yes, you are!”

Heather leaned over into the front seat. “Okay, okay, that’s enough. Daphne, Fred doesn’t like KISS, and that’s fine. And Fred, it’s fine that you like the Ascot Five, just don’t judge the rest of us for liking KISS. All right?”

There was a brief moment of silence, then Fred and Daphne nodded.

Heather nodded, smiling. “Good.” She turned to Daphne. “We can fix the star, I think. Or you could be the Bandit. Starchild went by the Bandit for a while.”

Daphne turned to her curiously. “I didn’t know that,”

“You really know a lot about KISS,” Velma remarked.

“Yeah,” Shaggy agreed. “Like, how do you know so much about KISS, Heather?”

Heather smiled mysteriously at them, though internally she was hit by an onslaught of nostalgia. “That’s my little secret,” 

[duckapus]

Timmy Specter - Enemies, Allies and Annoyances

Cosmo, Spirit of Loose Change You Lost Between the Couch Cushions: But most people just call him either Cosmo or the Coin Ghost. He can control any and all lost coins, whether they’ve fallen down a drain, rolled under heavy furniture, or -as his title implies- slipped between couch cushions. He also has a pet nickel named Phillip that he uses to focus his powers, and his obsession makes it so he won’t use them if he loses her, despite the fact that it would work with any coin.

Similarly to the Box Ghost, Cosmo’s power level is limited by the amount and types of coins he finds, though he gets much more dangerous much more quickly because he’s flinging around tiny metal disks and that quickly brings to mind ideas of mind-controlled bullets and metal tornadoes. still, he’s not all that smart, relying more on quantity than precision, so unless he’s left unchecked for several hours (more or less depending on the amount of lost coins in an area) he’s not particularly dangerous. Interestingly, he refuses to use coins that have been tossed into wishing wells, despite evidence that his powers do work on them. Other than that, the only coins he can’t use at all are ones put somewhere on purpose, such as those in banks, wallets, etc. or even if you’ve just put them down with intent for you or someone else to pick them up later.

El Matador: In life, he was Juandisimo Magnifico, a matador of exceptional skill, and known for his use of a deep violet cape over the traditional red. However, when he met his end not by the horn of a bull but the gun of a drunken man, his spirit was unsatisfied, and took on a new form in the Ghost Zone rather than move on, becoming a twisted parody of his former profession. No longer content with mere bulls, El Matador seeks out powerful beings to do battle with. And now he has his sights set on a certain young halfa...

El Matador is much like Timmy in the sense that he’s a very physical fighter, relying almost entirely on his sword and evasion tactics in battle. He also has his cape, which is able to throw other ghosts into a sort of battle rage when it brushes against them, preventing them from backing down or retreating until the fight has a winner. He will only ever engage in duels (unless there are extenuating circumstances), and has a large, powerful shield he can put up to enforce this which stops both ghosts and physical entities. He would have only fought Timmy once and been done with it, but interruptions just keep coming up, and his obsession seems to be changing to something far more... sinister.

Denzel Q. Crocker: Crocker is not a ghost, but rather a ghost researcher! He’s essentially Dimmsdale’s version of the Fentons, with his wacky inventions(that all actually work), his skewed ideas about ghost morality(that cause him to hunt Timmy), and his Ghost Portal(that he can never seem to keep closed). However he’s still Crocker, and thus is still obsessed with FAIRY GODPARENTS. In fact, the reason he went into ghost research in the first place is because he believes that there’s some connection between the two. In true Crocker fashion, he’s right, but not for the reasons he thinks. He’s still Timmy’s grumpy teacher, but he’s more like Mr. Lancer in this time since his belief in fairies never had the chance to ruin his life. He and Principal Waxelplax still didn’t end up together, but that was due to them drifting apart after high school rather than him going insane. He also doesn’t live with his mother in this timeline, though he does begrudgingly keep in touch with her.

Catman: Thankfully not the ghost of Adam West, Catman is actually the personification of his fandom’s love for the character. He’s actually one of the first ghosts to befriend Timmy, helping him escape Walker’s Prison during the boy’s first visit to the Ghost Zone, along with Dani Phantom who’d been captured as well. Catman is an amalgamation of most portrayals of the character, though he favors the cheerful demeanor and extensive arsenal of cheesy 60′s Catman, albeit with some of the seriousness and intimidation factor of the others added in when needed. He’s unique among ghost for his inability to fly, but despite this is feared and/or respected by nearly every ghost in the zone. After all, he is vengeance, he is the night, he is The Catman.

Mark Chang: Despite all the other changes, Mark is still an alien, and his appearances are still relatively the same. However, his initial arrival on Earth was due to natural portals being their usual horrible selves rather than a poorly thought out wish, and Vicky, Chester and AJ know of his true nature. He still falls in love with Vicky, Timmy still becomes “Earth’s Mightiest Warrior” by Yugopotamian standards, and Princess Mandie still causes all the problems in the world.

Schrodinger: A sabertooth tiger cub, Schrodinger is to Timmy as Cujo is to Danny, because I’ve always seen Timmy as more of a cat person and there’s no such thing as Sparky. She has the same size changing ability as Cujo, as well being able to either shoot or cover herself in electricity discharged from her fangs. The name is because Timmy had a very morbid sense of humor even before he half-died, and always wanted to name a cat that if he ever got one. The others usually just call her Roddy because they have no taste.

Remy Buxaplenty: has a serious case of ghost envy. Or rather halfa envy, since he found out Timmy is one and was fascinated with the idea that someone could have the powers of the dead without the nasty side-effect of actually, you know, dying. It doesn’t help that his parents, on top of being just as dismissive of him as in canon, are also quite intrigued by this “ghost fad”(as they call it) that Dimmsdale’s been caught up in. He wants those abilities for himself, whatever it takes, so he can prove to the world that he’s better than Timmy Turner and prove to his parents that he exists. However, when he’s catches the attention a certain bullfighter and given equipment by the mysterious “VP,” he may get far more help with that than he bargained for.

Whether he ends up liking it or not.

[theinsanecrayonbox]

Dogman:

Real name Duke Roverman, he first appeared in the comics in the 60s, and eventually also appeared on the 70s tv show, and remained a main villain through every Catman reboot. Originally muscle for hire, his back story was eventually retconned that he was from a poor ghetto, and earned the reputation as a “mad dog” as a teenager, when he’d purposely go out of his way to pick fight fights with prep-school kids on the east side of town. His main schemes in the beginning were stealing money (or being the muscle for said heists) in an attempt to redistribute the wealth to the ghetto poor. Eventually that was changed to him feeding his own desires to have wealth to get out of the ghetto, and eventually purchase and demolish it himself. He was the one that caused the near death of Copy Cat, and wound up with her getting amnesia; after that, Catman redoubled his efforts to take down Dogman, and eventually did catch and throw him in jail. A geriatric Dogman was one of the prisoners that was held in Sanquinchin Prison at the end of the Civil War event, however the aftermath revealed that he had died off panel at some point.

Kanary:

Real name Avis Gorman, she was first created for the comics, but actually appeared on the 70s show first (though in a different costume). She was mostly portrayed as a lounge singer that though then steal from her guests right after the show while mingling, or mark her targets then and go and steal from them some time later. She crossed paths with Adam first at a benefit dinner, and the two began an on-again-off-again romantic relationship as they flirted around each other in and out of their super personas; it was after Adam discovered she was a thief that he tried to help her reform, but anytime that ever came close to happening, something would rest their progress (retconn or otherwise) so their relationship never really went anywhere.

Mouse Man:

Real name Rodney Rodenavitz, he was a once used villain in the 70s show, but then was revamped into what he is now for the 90s show. He was a puzzle and trap maker, going out of his way to develop massive convoluted plans and Rube-Goldberg machines to try to entrap his victims, or pull off his oddly specific cheese-themed crimes. It was very obvious that he was a mouse because Catman was cat themed, but the right writers could make his premise work. He started life off as an intern at West Enterprises, trying to get his inventions going, but he was fired after the deaths of the Wests, and he grew resentful towards the lone heir, Adam, thinking it was somehow his fault. So unlike most other villains, he started with a vendetta against Adam West, not against Catman. At one point he even made the connection that Adam=Catman, but certain events made him forget that revelation before he could tell it to anyone of importance.

The Doberman of Doom/The Don:

Real name Donald Fitzroy, he is the villain that has gone through the most changes throughout different mediums. Originally, he was introduced in the pilot tv movie for the 70s show. He was a prepschool buddy of Adam’s, who had become a boss in the crime underworld, and also happened to have an interest in Egyptian mythology (and someone in editorial confused the Anubis mask for a Doberman Pincher, and the name just stuck). He was then written into the comics, still as the Doberman. After the failure of 9 Lives (where the writers tried to merge the Doberman and Dogman into one being with Anubis, since legend has it that the Doberman of Doom was originally meant to be Dogman to begin with), he was redone as “The Don” and lost the Anubis-like mask. When magic was brought back into Catman’s mythos though, he again tried to become the avatar of Anubis, but ended up having his soul trapped inside a ball of yarn that remained in the Cat Cave to this day.

The Whittler:

Real name Herbert Bucklebore, is actually a member of the Barnyard Gang, which the Crimson Chin villain Country Boy is also a part of (though this was a later addition to his back story). He was a silly villain from the 70s tv show, and didn’t really get much exposure other wise (until the aforementioned back story rewrite). Much like Mouse Man, his gimmick at first was to leave puzzle for Catman to deduce, in the form of wooden carvings.

Anubis:

The literal Egyptian Death God, viewed as the ultimate enemy of the 9 Cat Warriors. He played a main role on the canceled 9 Lives story, but once magic and the Cat Warriors were reintroduced into the main Catman storyline, so Anubis was reintroduced too.

All New Dogman:

Real name Milton Fields, he is the great nephew of the original Dogman. Much in the same vein as the All New Masked Magician, he inherited the title from his distant relative after his death. Coincidentally, he was bullied by Francis before he became Bull-E, and during the Civil War event, was in full support of the Registration, and even after taking the mantle, went to go register himself.. He was obviously turned away. Unlike his predecessor, he does want to do good…at first. Once he learns what has happened to the man that used to torment him, and learns what his great uncle did to the original Copy Cat (and what that will mean to her children, Giga and Cat Chick), things could change…

[fictionerd]

GOOD. TO. SEE. YOU. FRIENDS!!!

Here we are! The first post of Summer Season 2018 and we’ll be covering Planet With. This series is released on Sundays and can be watched on Crunchyroll. 

Okay, so let’s cover what we learn from the first two episodes of Planet With.

In episode one we’re introduced to Souya, a young amnesiac who dreams of horrifying giant draconic creature attacking a city and some one flying off to confront it. See it’s shit like this that causes dragons to have a bad reputation. Seriously I can’t believe these assholes who go around burning whatever the hell they want just because they can breath fire. If it weren’t for them dimensional travel wouldn’t be such a daunting prospect for me. I never know when some one is going to have a traumatic flashback and attack me all because some scaley clown got it into their head to “burninate” something.

Sorry, I’m digressing again. After waking up from his ptsdream Souya prepares to have a normal breakfast with his perfectly normal housemates of a large cat-person and green-haired maid. 

Oh wait... My bad. See I’m used to hanging out with a Teddy-Bear whisperer with the ability to access the life’s memory of a version of herself in any given universe, an elf who ONLY exists in the metaverse of the Akashic Record, and most recently a shadow-monster who spent three months pretending to be Swole-Bear. There was also that time I tried to hang out with a copy of a video game character, but we’re not considering that canon anymore. At least not entirely for legal reasons. Oh! There’s also the British man who tears holes in dimensions to fight against “unfair fates” who I’m apparently hosting a podcast with now? My point being that to me the above image is perfectly normal. To most anyone else this is probably at least a three on the Sir Memery WTF chart.

After finishing his veggie breakfast Souya sets off for school complaining about wanting to eat some meat where he bumps into his class rep whose name he has forgotten. You’d think this is just an excuse to set up Tsundere vibes with her, but no it’s far FAR worse than that. See her name is: Kagaratamaha? [wrong buzzer] Hakatamagara? [wrong buzzer] Ta-ka-ma-ga-ha-ra? [Correct Tone] 

So Nickname Pending is worried about Souya and how he doesn’t make friends at his new school. This is because she knows what it’s like to be the new kid, and has apparently never watched an anime in her life so she doesn’t quite grasp the concept of “Leave the mysterious blue-haired transfer alone”.

Side Note: This character’s introduction marks the first time I’ve ever gotten a Japanese pun without some one explaining it to me. So allow me to ruin it for you all by explaining it. She offers Souya some of her Hamburger Steak to which he replies with tears of join “Megane-sama” which she mishears as “Megami-sama” and sheepishly replies that she doesn’t think she’s a goddess before immediately realizing what he’d actually said. This leads into the reveal of her actual name which I refuse to ever use the entirety of again because I honestly don’t think the joke is that funny.

Later that day Souya’s shounen receptors begin to tingle as he picks up on the impending conflict of the story. A UFO is sighted offshore headed towards the city. When the air-force is deployed to deal with the object (Picture in header) they find themselves the victim of some strange joyous delusion and leave the object alone. it’s only when seven strange people, apparently psychics of some kind, utilize their powers to confront it is it stopped. We see one of these people enter the object through a “Weak Point” and have his own delusion.

See, his mother was killed in a fire when he was a little boy causing him to become a firefighter. The UFO hits his brain with a delusion of child him being held back from the blaze by a firefighter only for that firefighter to turn out to be adult him. Adult Firefighter Psychic dude runs into the fire, saves his mom, and the two of them walk through the cherry blossoms as he sorts through all the pent up regrets he has about not being able to save her when he was a kid. Only after we’ve conveniently gotten to know this character’s defining trauma does his squad get through to him and break the delusion, then he uses his Psychic Golem Powers to wreck the hell out of the UFO causing it and copies of it that had appeared around the world to disappear all at once. The same can be said for the Psychics who all blast off to separate places to avoid the fate of E.T. one presumes

While all this was going on Souya got a call from Ginko (That’s green-haired maid lady for those not following the series who also don’t care about spoilers). She tells Souya that he has to defeat “it”, but contrary to what everyone in the audience thinks it turns out that “it” refers to one of the Psychics and not the UFO thing. After Ex-Firefighter current world-saver exits the bushes onto a highway he encounters Souya the cat-man and Ginko. Souya is sporting a mask and being basically lead by the nose at the behest of Catman and Ginko. Now hold onto your seats because this is where shit gets REALLY weird. 

Catman swallows Souya turning into a mech in the process that Souya is now piloting. They get into a fight with Firefighter dude who summons up his psychic golem thing. After fumbling around at Ginko’s direction Souya manages to pilot the Catmech to victory over Psychic Fireman and retrieves a vial of star-shaped dust that is the “source of his power”. At which point I’m lead to believe that Souya recovered his memories because he shouts at Firefighter to tell his friends that Souya is going to kick their collective asses. This is presumably because he believes them to be behind his ptsdream.

After the credits roll we see a scene where a guy I can only describe a scruffy Alder from Pokemon Gen 5 says ominously that Firefighter dude had been taken out.

So, before even watching episode two I can already hands-down predict that this guy is the Draconic asshole from Souya’s ptsdream. Not sure how everything fits together but my working theory is that Souya’s from another planet that Earth governments or some shadowy organization somehow invaded and stole something from. Souya is a sleeper agent and the “Peas” balloon things are meant to lure out those in possession of the Stolen Macguffin or whatever.

There we have Episode One. Please excuse me now while I go watch Episode Two. Well... I mean you can just keep reading by the time this goes up but... BRB!

[Approximately 30min later]

Well my theory from about two paragraphs ago is up in smoke as soon as the opening scenes of this episode roll in and further dashed upon the rocks by Ginko later in the episode. All things in their proper order.

So Torai (That’s firefighter-guy’s name btw) makes his report to dragon-man about his encounter with Soya and company. The other six Psychic warriors all make jabs at him as though he died even when he’s sitting right there in an example of a gag that is legit funny unlike Tara’s name from last episode. While we’re talking about the exposition meeting may I just say that I feel BETRAYED!

See Dragon CEO guy is as nerdy as I AM! He’s the one who found out that the enemy force is called Nebula. He called the giant abominations “Nebula Weapons” gives Soya and Company the name Nebula Soldiers, and what does he call the Psychic Golems his crew uses to fight? Psychokinetic Mega-God Photon Armor. If I didn’t know better I’d think my pops made him from the same mold as me no less. Oh, and their little world-saving club? It’s the Citizens' Safety Center Special Defense Section: "Grand Paladin". I’m in tears, people, this is a Draconid after my own heart.

So, the “Grand Paladin” peeps implement the buddy system in case they run into Soya again. Meanwhile Soya’s having a sulk because apparently Ginko and “Sensei” dragged him to Earth to be their soldier. He goes out on a walk in Iron Clogs (I’m guessing this is a joke I’m not getting). On the run he meets up with Torai who just happens to have purchased a bunch of meat buns from a convenience store. They have a conversation because Torai is a nice guy (that’s a legit nice guy not the version that’s been turned into a derogatory term by certain groups online). See Torai, while out looking for his attacker couldn’t help noticing what he thought was a middle-schooler sitting on a random bench crying and came over to see if there was anything he could do to help.

He gives Soya a bun they chat for a bit with Soya desperately trying both not to give away who he really is as well as to eat the bun because dammit he just wants some MEAT for once! All of a sudden the evacuation alarm is sounded because this wonderful abomination has appeared off shore.

Nebula really needs to consult a different artist about their designs. I personally recommend @dashfox1artwork. 

Robin: Shamelessly plugging your internet friends are we dragon-boy? 

Fic: If you’re not going to show up and fight keep your mouth shut Shadow-bear. I’m just doing my part to show that not all Dragons are assholes. Robin: Whatever you say.

So, the six remaining Psycho-God pilots attack the Ugly Bacon Idol and the pink-haired girl of the team, Miu, is the one to enter the core. The hallucination she sees is of her beating her friend Harumi (Pilot of the Bear-armor) at apparently a Judo competition. We find out that Miu has always just wanted to be strong, and we also learn that she IS strong being able to break through the illusion of the Nebula Weapon with relative ease and destroy the thing. It’s at this point that I should mention that a message has flashed before each of the characters who take one of these things out. In Miu’s case the message was “It’s okay to be weak”. For Torai in episode one the message was “I forgive you” presumably preying on his regrets about his mom.

After Piggy McHideous is dispatched the group separates into its pairs and as we expected Soya and Co target the pair with a member who just fought a battle, but let’s back up for a second because there’s some exposition from Ginko during the fight with the Baconator that needs addressing.

She reveals to Soya that Nebula is indeed the name of the group they work for, but there are multiple faction. Ginko and “Sensei” are with the “Pacifist Faction” whereas the Monuments to terrible design sense that have been popping up in the harbor belong to the “Sealing Faction”. Basically think of this as political parties. One wants to prevent humanity from rising up against them one day by brutally suppressing their ability to advance and keep them in a state of complacency, while the other just wants to take away any dangerous toys that humanity might come up with and hope that they can “guide” humanity onto the path of “Love” rather than “Power”.

Hmmm one group bent on maintaining their personal status quo at the cost of anyone else and another that wants to control precisely what power the general populace has access to in order to “guide” them on the “right path”? I wonder where I’ve heard that one before?

Sorry about that. The Writer is coming through me a little strongly there. Point is that Ginko is using Soya to enact social and ideological control... I MEAN to take away the magical stardust that allows the Psycho-God Pilots to do their thing... yeah. Back to the proper progress of the episode: Soya once again pilots his cat-mecha-sensei to fight against Miu and Harumi. It is a pretty fun fight, but all things must go as has been foretold. So after being on the ropes for most of the conflict Soya turns everything around at the last second with a miracle uppercut against the Bunny-god armor. As Miu is falling back to Earth Ginko appears and grabs the stardust vial away from her. Apparently Ginko can just Mary Poppins herself to wherever she pleases? They all land and Ginko’s like “That’s all for today”, but Soya’s having none of it. He’s ready to take the fight to Bear-mech too when all the other Psycho-Pilots show up including CEO Dragonface to say “Checkmate”, and that’s where our story concludes for now.

Y’know I’m coming more and more around to the opinion that we should be routing for “Grand Paladin” here rather than the lady influencing Soya or the massive, faceless organization that wants to turn us all into Proles from 1984. I mean, yeah, they do have the snake-eyed dude. They meet in what appears to be some sort of board room, and the writing seems to indicate that they’re the “Antagonists” if not the villains, but so far they don’t seem to be anything but a collection of well-intentioned if somewhat zany people. Even the big CEO-type with the intimidating presence, as was discussed earlier, is a lovable and hammy goofball. 

I love any series that makes its antagonists human. Granted cartoonish villainy and even edgelordiness has its place in stories, but when you can make your antagonists and especially your villains feel human and relatable it just rings home that nobody is the villain in their own story. Everyone has reasons for what they do. They may not have excuses or justifications, but they all have reasons.

For instance, I have a reason for breaking my own rules here by reading my political views into the story.

[pauses for dramatic effect]

Yes, yes I’m sure you’re all very shocked at this revelation. I mean I was so subtle about it (/s). My reason is that when I went back and really thought about what the “Sealing” and “Pacifist” factions of Nebula stood for I (and this is really the nerd behind The Nerd speaking) couldn’t help but see parallels to some of the more distasteful extremes of Conservative and Liberal politics at work. Both sides seek to impose their morality upon others. While one does so by attempting to keep people complacent with the status quo, the other does it by appealing to the rebellious nature inherent in people and channeling it into “causes”.They use guilt and peer pressure to convince people that their way of thinking is correct and I absolutely cannot stand seeing it happen. Especially when they prey upon others using causes that need legitimate champions! 

The goals of the “Pacifist” faction are arguably “good”. They are part of a group that has watched humanity evolve and they only want the best for us. They “keep their involvement to a minimum”, but at the end of the day they’re doing the same thing that the “Sealing” faction is doing. They’re enforcing their own will on humanity by taking away humanity’s means to fight against them, or anyone for that matter.

In the anime this is likely because the “Pacifist” faction is short-sighted and hasn’t stopped to consider what will happen to humanity when they take away the only weapon they have against the “Sealing” faction, but in reality? In reality groups like the “Pacifist” Faction either are themselves or contain an element that wants the people they’re disarming to become reliant upon them for what they need. They take away that person’s own weapons and replace them with their own. They dictate the rules of battle and push you to come to them for aid and defense. They accrue personal power and influence at the cost of their followers’ freedom of thought.

These are important things to think about and be on the lookout for, and it’s an issue that is very prevalent in my own life and dealings online. So those are my reasons for why I read political allegory into the factions of Planet With. Now am I justified for doing this when I so often decry others for “reading shit that isn’t there into stories”? No, of course I’m not. Or rather I’m not justified using that argument against people who dropped a show as a result of what they read into it. 

I’m not going to lie. I’m inexperienced with expressing views on creative work online, and am overly sensitive to certain things. I’m just as flawed as anybody else. It’s hard for me to understand when people see “bullshit” in something that I didn’t see. It’s hard for me to accept some one calling a show (particularly one I like) “Garbage” when really it’s just not clicking with them. I know that I’ve been guilty of calling a show “Garbage” in my time, but it’s a term I hope to avoid moving forward. I want to live up to my professed belief that there is good to be found in all fiction, even the “bad” fiction. Part of that is accepting the responsibility I tell others they need to accept. To practice what I preach.

If I’m determined that the Audience has just as important a role in creating art as the Authors then I need to learn to accept the interpretations of my fellow audience members, and to feel free to express my own interpretations of things.

[stops to take a break and slide back into character]

Wow... That ended up being a lot heavier than I imagined. What a way to kick off the summer season! There’s more to come but for now I need a break, and the writer could probably use a nap.

Until next post keep talking fiction, friends! I’ll see you soon

[ukulelewrites]

Mobile Masterlist

Updated as of 5/29/19

☆ - fluff

☾ - angst

♫ - au

∞ - steamy

♡ - personal fave

Series:

Letters to You (Multi-Membered) ☾

“With shaky hands you wrote them. A letter to all the boys whom you’ve loved. A letter to all the boys who had loved you.“

Letters to You: Yoongi

Letters to You: Jungkook ♡

Letters to You: S. Coups

Letters to You: Wonwoo

Letters to You: JR ♡

Something Different (17’s Joshua Badboy!AU) ☆ ☾ ♫          haitus!

“You were never a fan of the ever so cocky class president, but one night, one chance encounter, was all it took to make a little hatred turn into a little of something else.”

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5

The Cherry Pickers’ Club ☾ ♫ ☆

“The Cherry Pickers’ Club, Evanson Academy’s best kept secret. Passed down from year to year, the boys who become in possession of the tattered journal have one job and one job only, to go cherry picking.“

In Terms of Fire & Ice (Wanna One’s Seongwoo Fuckboi!AU)

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7

“Girls came easy to Seongwoo, so when he’s tasked with popping a girl’s cherry, he scoffs at the notion of failure. However, he finds himself challenged by Evanson’s very own ice queen, you.”

Metanoia ☾ ♫ ☆

"One night. One tipsy night spent within the bed of a man you met just hours before. Who knew one night would turn your entire life upside-down?"

1 / 

All's Fair In Love & War ☾ ♫ ☆

"An A on your paper. A stupid bet spurred by anger. And an especially annoying frat boy who goes by the name of Kim Donghan. Who knew such things would lead you to such a mess?"

1 / 2

Happily Ever After ☆ ♫

Fairy tales, don’t we sometimes want to live in them? After all, every fairy tale ends happily ever after

Lee Daehwi: Beauty & the Beast

Bae Jinyoung: Sleeping Beauty

Stray Kids On The Big Screen

A series of fics based off of 90s/early 00s rom-coms starring each member of Stray Kids coming to a fic blog near you!

One-Shots:

Epiphany (NCT’s Ten Soulmates!AU) ☆ ☾ ♫ ♡

“Your heart ached so much, but you couldn't help it. He was ethereal. You couldn’t help but want him, even if it tore your heart apart.”

DanDan the CatMan (Wanna One’s Daniel) ☆

“You could easily tell by the crumpled clothes, messy hair, and abundant number of purple bruises marring his neck that he was on the walk of shame too.”

A Fanta-Sea (Wanna One’s Jihoon) ☆ ♡

“You, a rookie idol, have a chance encounter with Wanna One’s Park Jihoon, the boy that nae maeum seoge jeojang’d into your heart, in front of a vending machine backstage at M!Countdown.”

Lipstick Prince (PD101’s Kim Donghan) ☆ ∞ ♡

“Interning at FAVE Entertainment? Great! Being the lead stylist for JBJ? Awesome! Having to help one of the members recreate an old picture? Well, that’s another story…”

Scintilla (PD101’s Kim Donghan Friends to Lovers!AU) ☆ ☾ ♫ ♡

Drabbles:

1 / 2

“Your friendship with Donghan was based off of a mere competition of who could be the bigger shit. However, something transitions in your senior year, and you can’t seem to figure out what.”

Home Run (NU'EST’s JR Baseball!AU & Friends to Lovers!AU) ☆ ♫

“You hate baseball, ever since the concussion of 3rd grade, you’ve hated it. However, it just so happened to be your best friend’s favorite sport, and when he makes the team, you’re forced to go to his game. However, maybe baseball won’t be that bad….”

Easy to Hate (PD101’s Kim Donghan Enemies to Lovers!AU) ☾ ♫ ∞ ♡

“Your hatred for Kim Donghan was strong. Just the mention of him made your blood boil, but when his dance crew end up sharing a studio with yours, it seems like sometimes, it’s easy to blur the lines between love and hate.”

Saudade (NU'EST’s JR Soulmates!AU) ☆ ☾ ♫        coming soon!

“In a world where your soulmate’s last words are etched on your skin, it wasn’t hard for you to imagine a future with your boyfriend. However, one fated phone call changes everything.”

Strawberry-Scented Memories (Stray Kids’ Han Jisung Amnesia!AU) ☾ ♫ ☆

“Memories. A vestige of the past. Something you desperately reach for, yet cannot obtain. However, with new technology, maybe you can find something buried deep inside your mind that you cannot seem to live without.”

Con Amore (Stray Kids' Han Jisung Trainee Reader!AU) ☾ ♫ ☆

You've worked so hard for this moment, but it seems like all of your efforts are being torn down and ripped apart. However, it seems like there's always that one person you can turn to for comfort.

thank u, next (Stray Kids' Bang Chan Rock Star!AU) ☾ ♫ ♡

Who knew a Billboard-topping song about your exes would make you shed your pop princess image and bring back the bittersweet memories you had tried so hard to push away.

Veritaserum (NCT Dream’s Na Jaemin Hogwarts!AU)  ☆ ♫ ♡

“Three drops of this and even You-Know-Who himself would spill out his darkest secrets.” Who knew that stupid potion was going to cause you to confront the stupid peach-haired Hufflepuff who stole your first kiss?

Bullet Fics:

The Softest Boy™ (Wanna One’s Daniel Bad Boy!AU) ☆ ♫

Volleyball Stars (Wanna One’s Seongwoo & Daniel Volleyball!AU) ☆ ♫

Wanna One Fuckbois ☾ ♫

Dancer Reader x Wanna One’s Seongwoo ☆

Jonghyun + Trip to Italy ☆

Boyfriend Donghyun ☆

Werewolf Daniel + Cats ☆ ♫

Soulmate Jung Jung ☆ ♫

Touch Me? ☆ ♫

High School Woojin ☆ ♫

Good Boy!Donghan & Bad Girl!Reader ☆ ♫

Drabbles:

Vampire Minhyun ∞ ♫

Father Seongwoo ☆ ♫

Hyeongseob + “I brought you an umbrella.” ☆

Woojin + “dance with me, noona” ☆

Vampire Woojin ☆ ♫

New Neighbour Seongwoo ☆

Soulmate Woojin ☆ ♫

Vampire Donghan ∞ ♫

Demon Jonghyun ☾ ♫

Friends with Benefits Donghan / 2 ∞ ♫

Ex Daniel / 2 ☾ ♫

Donghan + Work From Home ∞

Jisung + Sweater Weather ☆

Minki + Havana ☾ ♫

SFW Alphabet:

Lai Guanlin

[plastercasterdemo]

the fox character map

ok. i know i havent gotten ‘round to publishing paul OR genes origin story, but i really wanted to do everyones favorite boy eric in my au!! you can read spaceman here and catman here! (read catman to get a sense of this story :p)

origin story:

after his creation of the catman, cancer researcher emelio santiago has fled new york city, leaving his wife, kids, and family without a trace. it is three years later in his own scientific lab in a small farmhouse in ohio. still curious about his creation of the catman, he is dedicating his new “experiment” to also attempt to make a human/animal hybrid.

trigger warning: includes mentions of harming animals (injecting them) and violence! please proceed with caution!

santiagos pov

This past winter was cold and brutal. The wind blew so harshly on my windows, I am suprised my panes did not splinter and fall apart. The house had no insulation, causing me to keep a fire lit every hour of the day. I stay in the basement, the coldest part of the house, preparing for my next experiment.

The refrigerator in my basement was full of HeLa. I spent hours a day curing the cells, moving them from petrie dish to petrie dish so they can continue to grow. By March, I had a large collection of over 300 dishes full of the cancerous cells.

The basement was almost always damp, causing me to walk around with, at the cery least, my slippers on at all times. The only light that was wired up was a small, dangling bulb coming from the joists that held up the main floor of the house. Damp, watery dirt was seeping through the cinder blocks in almost every two feet of space. Though not as clean as the lab I had previously worked in, my personal basement lab was a very well hidden away room, one in which I could store things no man should keep in his house.

When the ground started to thaw, I put on my boots with the good traction and set out the cages to catch the next animal for my experument. As I was living in a large field surrounded by trees, foxes often roamed across my yard, searching for food.

When I caught one in my trap, still alive, I grabbed the cage and took it inside and down into my basement. It whined a little as I opened the hatch to my lab, the room as dark as night.

“Quiet,” I found myself speaking to it as it whimpered with every step I took. We went down the stairs and I went to the center of the room, turned on the bulb and watched as light flooded the area within five feet of the light.

I set the fox down.

Silently, I wheeled the small table under the light and set the cage on top of that, studying the fox for the first time. It was a large male, with matted fur around his mouth. His paws were dirty, and his tail gritty. He whined once more as I stuck my face next to his, clearly scared of our interaction.

Grabbing a flashlight, I make my way to the fridge and grab a dish of cancer cells. The fox watches me as I do so. I apply gloves to my hands and grab my tools to preform the test.

I stick the needle full of cells into the fox, and it yelps as I start to work. Its breaths slow down, its chest heaving up and down before I realize I must act quickly.

Once I gather the cells from the fox (a mix of HeLa and its own cells), I put them in the fridge to grow. I remove the fox’s body from my lab so to not attract flies, throwing it outside my door for other animals to enjoy.

I wait a few weeks before conducting my experiment, gathering the courage to become Dr. Frankenstein once more. The Catman was an accidental creation, but now, I am attempting to do the same on purpose.

In my basement is a deep freezer. To my best ability, I have preserved the body of an Eric C. using ice and keeping him wet. His skin has turned a yellowish color, but other than that, there was no sign of decay. His fingernails were still intact, his curly black hair was still attached to his skull.

He was a handsome man, aged about 30. I had found him on the side of the road, inside a vehicle that had been burnt. Miraculously, his body had not been scorched, only his clothing had been touched. I knew the minute I saw him there, half dangling out of his car, that this miracle will bring good fortune to my experiment.

I drag him out of my freezer and place him on the same table I had operated on the fox. His lifeless body was ice cold to the touch. The light hit his features, revealing his face to me for the first time since I had retrieved his body.

I collect my journal from the shelf and date the page, titling it Eric. Car Accident + Fox and HeLa. I walk over to the table and get ready to preform.

With shaky hands, I begin to put those fox cells into him. I wait a moment before doing it again. And again. And thrice more.

I scoff, aggravated at myself. What am I not doing correctly now? I start up the stairs to retrieve my old notes when the steel table creeks from behind me.

“Eric?” I call, not facing him and a playful tome to my voice.

“I am here.”

His voice is deep, yet bubbly at the same time. I turn around and face him. He is sitting atop the table, looking at his bare body. The light bounces off his black curls and chest hairs. He looks at me, his Creator, his Father, and his eyes light up.

“I am here,” he repeats, with excitement in his voice. “I was just at the gates of Heaven, soeaking to our great Lord! I have seen him! Our Master is real!”

“Now, this is not the Great Awakening, my dear child,” I say, approaching him. “Don’t speak such nonsense to I, your new Master. I shall believe it when I meet Him myself.”

I take my notebook in my hand and begin to quiz Eric. He behaves much like the Catman had when he first awoke. He remembers his early parts of his life, his deeds; however, does recognize he had died. Unlike the Catman, a man who I assume had lacked religion in his day to day life, was able to recite descriptions of Heaven. He was able to tell me about his death in great detail— he was on his way to visit his girlfriend in Corton, Ohio, when his engine caught fire. He describes to me in depth what the feeling of death was like.

“Thank you, Mr. Eric,” I say, closing my notebook. “You’ve been very helpful in my study.”

“Thank you, sir,” he says, pushing himself off the table.

“Ah,” I say, putting a hand on his chest. “You cannot leave, however. You see, in about two weeks time, you will turn part animal, as my previous creation had. You will turn raging and sick, attempting to kill whoever you see. We don’t want you going out and about like this, now, do we?”

He wraps his hand around my arm, pulling it away from him. His face turns to one of an angry countenance, snarking at me.

“You cannot keep me here!”

“You, are my son,” I say kindly, looming into his eyes. “My second son whom I intend to keep a thoughtful eye upon. You wouldn’t want to make your father upset now, would you?”

“My father?” he says, backing away from me. “You aren’t my father. My only Father is the one who lives in Heaven, who gave me a second life, a second Chance! You cannot be my father!”

“Eric, I say calmly. “What did I say about speaking nonesense? God is dead. I am your God.”

His fists ball up at his sides, his face heated with anger. As he lunged at me, I revealed what I had behind my back: a needle with liquid gold within it. He jumps at me, and I stab him in the chest, filling his heart with the injection.

He falls calmly to the ground, still breathing, but slowly. His arms sprawl across the floor, his chest moving up and down slowly, like the fox had done in its last moments.

“If I am to have a son, a second son whom I can keep and study, then my son will not be blood hungry. My son will have a heart of gold.”

[a-not-so-creepy-pasta]

[FFXIV writing drabble]

I don’t have any examples of my writing really ‘on site’ and I have a few i’ve written for @hlkproductions​ of OCs from final fantasy xiv: a realm reborn And two ship oneshots for her as well, but I dunno if people would really care to read my silly things.  Long story short; Here’s a story of my poor character Kei’ta talking with his psudo-student Makoto[a different character from hlk].

Setting up a home in the distemperate forest of the flourished Raincatcher Gully would always sound like a simple task to those outside the reaches of deadly claws and thrashing tongues of the natural residence of the vibrant wood - waters infested with pugils of malice and gigantuan toads both quick to lash onto any who came to try their hand; leaving the land to the domain of the magiked coeurls and vicious raptors to defend - so the idea of a safe home was little beyond that of the premade buildings crafted for the trading posts before the start of the calamity.

An ideal such as that made those who made their home perfect for the purpose of hiding, as that was after all, all he had done for the past few years.

Hide.

Like he was doing now.

Eyes of amber and honey glanced to the scaled Doman from a tabled chair at the corner of the small raised hut that he had come to know as home in the rainforest, the mage of whom he shared the space with was not new to him; far from it by this point, they had traveled a fair distance in the gully, down the coast to the dancers as well - even fighting more than a few territorial creatures - but this young tailed man, this one that had been lost to the seas and land, spoke more about his own homeland and self than Kei’ta had in years.

Scarred fingers tapped along his thigh, the feeling of the course stitchwork numb to his tired nerves as they moved to glaze the air at the elbow of his other arm; no flesh or substance to feel there, nothing apart from the sting of ached memories and broken promises.

His stare drifted to the slender fingers of his companion - who teased the silence with glints of magic at his fingertips, spindling sparks and elements in a vibrance of colors; seeing such a use made that clutch of the past pulse in a highlight of his former life - prompting words from his usually distant demeanor.

“I used to do that.” His voice was hoarse, quiet, unused.

Makoto’s steeled gaze shifted from his mindless movements to the man who had found him those months ago, letting the aether flow free from his grasp as his attention changed. Straightening his posture on his cot he gave a soft tilt of his head to flip the long bangs of hair from his view as he questioned in turn.

“Do what? Magic?”

A nod was given in response, but the Miqote didn’t opt to continue for that moment, letting the words hang in the air - Makoto could feel his tail’s scales shiver in mild agitation at the usual clouded conversations they had.

It was only as the Doman stood from his bed - adjusting his balance in a practiced ease to his prosthetic leg - moving to come to the small table did Kei’ta start again.

“White magic specifically, Chosen by the Elementals to protect the Twelveswood and beyond.”

Bright eyes narrowed as the ninja spoke, idle hands sliding the second chair across the wood to let him sit, he had not know Kei’ta to speak of himself so it was treaded territory that Makoto asked “What happened?”

The dull gloss of dark fur of his ear and tail moved in time with his soft chuckle - a sad sound, there was little mirth to it, almost like he had forgotten how. The dragon like mage found himself sinking lower in his seat as the air felt weighted with the realization of how little he knew about the man he lived with - the hunter of his foods, and mender of his clothes - the wonderment of ideas of what that could be.

Calloused fingers rose to the table as the older man began his answer, sliding along the surface of the sanded wood with little more than gentle ministrations to occupy his thoughts as his words spun his tale.

“Lots. I lived… I lost, I loved - I died… and I lost again.”

Makoto’s brow furrowed for a moment as he tried to piece together the sentence, but kept his tongue tied tight, letting the quiet man speak his piece.

“Years ago - A lifetime ago really - I was entrusted as a ‘warrior of light’... a title I did little to earn apart from keeping the real champion alive… Her and I, we traveled the realm, fought primals and those that claimed themselves to be gods; not a notch in our belts save victory…”

His lips drew to a line for a moment, eyes softening as he reflected upon a memory - though Makoto could see the pain in those tired eyes equal with that tender stare. The Au Ra knew more about loss than the average person, more than any would in a lifetime - and that glazed longing… Makoto didn’t say a word, letting his silent friend speak at his own pace.

The graveled spin of words burned in his throat, clearing it did nothing to ease the weight on his tongue, nor the stutter of his breath as he started his story again;

“But… I made mistakes. We became involved in a plot far larger than ourselves and our fights - things not solved by weaponry alone - Trapped into a vortex of flight and treachery - we were taken separately… and I…”

Kei’ta’s hand moved to the stump of his arm, grazing it with his palm as their eyes connected, he had no need to state the obviousness of his loss. That night took more than friendships and limbs, to some it stole spirit and drive. Makoto’s own fingers danced at the edge of the cloth of his pant, toeing the line of his own marred flesh; there were some things that didn’t need to be spoken.

The cat let his hand fall back to toy with the dust on the table, words sounding easier as his story unfolded, as he found a kindred heart to speak too;

“They took so much time from me; I didn’t understand how long till it was over, but It felt like a lifetime before I had seen the sun again… by that time I….”

He cleared his throat once again, adjusting his posture in an almost physical effort to be more comfortable talking to the dear companion, the one who shared more with a stranger than the ‘saviour’ himself.

“I had been consumed by that Taint I had worked so hard to cure with my conjuring… and I let it fester… wanted it too - deprived myself of the healing I knew I needed… all cause I fee- felt like I deserved it. It was better than the alternative of guilt and numbness… I became a Dark Knight… easily.”

The admittance wasn’t something that sounded easy to the hesitant words and slow speech, and the Doman could understand why - just the thought of it, just the idea of such a thing flooded his blood with ice, dancing across his nerves with a sparked fire - itching to leap from the chair in defence from the words, from the potential of what could be lurking under those tired eyes.

Kei’ta could see this; lips pulling to a frown for a moment, before he rose from the table to stand - tail swishing in a unkept beat, a few moments given to his feet to pace the small cabin - soon tempting a glance to his friend with cautious words;

“As I’ve said; A lifetime ago… Oboro’s made sure of that.”

His lungs swelled with air as the small Doman found his body relaxing, breathing back to a silent norm at the words - no matter how he had tried to keep his reaction to a minimum - going as far as to recline against the chair in a lax movement, speaking with his own hesitance at a question that nagged at his mind;

“Who was ‘She’? The woman you were talking about?”

Makoto almost regretted asking - seeing how Kei’ta’s tail stopped full swing, the dulled color of his ears twitching for a moment before staying taut to their position - but he could also hear the low hum in his throat as he tried to answer.

“Emmatea. A Dragoon of unmeasured caliber. There was no lancer I had ever come across - friendly or not - that could match her skill in the art. I had asked her once if she had ever danced - and boy did she treat me to a…”

It was almost comical how his expression shifted from the sorrowful remembrance to a gentle wave of embarrassment before he skipped over the topic.

“She was the only reason I lived. I could keep her and I alive through any fight, any storm - her faith in me made sure of that - but I would never be able to fight like she did… It wasn’t fury, nor just pure skill… it was a will, indomitable and stubborn that made her so scary.”

By this point the rambling catman had returned to his seat, though this time he sat facing out, leaning with his good side against the back of the wood with a chuckled sigh.

“Emmatea… she was my sun… and I never told her that enough.”

Makoto saw that sadness once again edging to his eyes - that dark numbness he had become so prone to falling into - and Makoto found himself scrambling to speak again - anything to keep this smile on the lips of his friend;

“What was she like? What did she look like?”

His ears once again swiveled to listen to the soft voice of the Au Ra’s concern, though hearing only the questions to spin thoughts to a happy memory.

“She was… amazing. Even out of combat her prowess for things amazed me - quick to make friends, flirty or not, we always had a full party with us when we needed them, even if they had better things to do than try and help her get to a particularly difficult fishing spot… Not shy in asking for things either; but just as quick to offer whatever she could to make it up to us… “

Kei’ta paused a moment.

“And… she was…. Is…. beautiful. There is no person I have ever seen that I will say, that I can say, makes me feel like she does. He fur always glistens with a shine, a glow, that brightens the deep browns, the gentle curls of her hair always soft like silk… I never tired of brushing it for her - or just holding her... “

His lips pursed for a second before his voice lowered to a murmur;

“She was warm… I… Even when we made camp in the ruins near Al Meigo…. I was never cold. Emmatea would always want me to hold her… she knows I don’t mind, I’d never make a fuss.”

Makoto noticed how the ninja danced his phrases between present and past tense, a frown pressing against his lips, almost like he didn’t know he had lost everything yet.

“Even when I had just started my Healer’s training; trying in vain to get a steady hold over my emotions, she always tips that scale without trying, I just can’t - couldn’t- bear to see her injured… or worse….I.”

His words stopped abruptly as he raised his palm to his face, tight fingers clenched over his eyes as his jaw clenched tight. Makoto’s posture straightened, words on the tip of his tongue as his fingers began to reach for the distraught man - but he stopped as he heard the soft choked sob caught in his throat, and saw the tears starting to escape from between his fingers.

Instead he just waited, silently as his conflicted companion fought the demons of his memories, and the guilt of his actions.

Thanks for reading. Honestly, it means a lot just you doing that. Im not a confident person at all. Not good at much. So Thank you.

[dmndsave]

why do I feel like the Dawn Valley churches are equally staffed by people who have lived there all their lives and know what kind of bullshit happens and people who have NO idea and got suckered into taking the position and now they can't leave

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:17

A town the size of Dawn Valley can only support a few small churches, which are most likely lead by ‘pastors who know’At least one of the Baptist’s who lead out of an old converted grocery store, swears up and down against demons but no one really minds himHe’s a good preacher though and is good with the youth, so his church is popular

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:18

https://undertaker-gifs.tumblr.com/post/188198876049

oh cute...

Tumblr

Undertaker gifs

Undertaker gifs

yeah there are a couple small ones

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:19

There’s of course the old Methodist which has been here since everyone’s great-great grandma

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:19

there is at least one legit catholic exorcist living in town and you can't change my mind

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:19

there's one that's not too too far from the edge of town where the home is run by pastor reidand ironically his youngest daughter Sandy was friends with the spooks when they were little

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:19

You know all the pastors and priests would regularly deal with the Undertaker because of the funerals

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:20

YUP

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:20

And it’s a small town so probably with an aging populationBut everyone is kinda cool with the weird stuffIt’s background noise at this pointAt least one of the old ladies still pinches Taker’s cheeks if she sees him

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:21

there's actuallya couple generations backmaybeeeee 150-ish yearsone of the New Pastors decided to kick out the spooky family because they didn't like "witches" in their town(not witches, dear, but nobody listened)and the spooks at the time just went"alright. children, we're going to your aunt rabekkah"town lasted a weekthen it was "please come back there are coyotes in the school" "i'm not sure how we can help" "THEY'RE SPEAKING LATIN" "oh, alright, but only if you ask nicely"

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:23

one day a new priest from outside the area is gonna get suckered into taking over and the previous guy is going to have some STORIES for them

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:23

"HELL IS REAL""i know""NO LISTEN--"

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:25

No, no, priest is Catholic, this guy doesn’t care if they’re demonic so long as they participate in holy communion and confess ever Sunday—The minister can be a real nut job though and was very upset when Kane explained hell in detail to him

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:25

"The new guy quit again. He didn't even meet the Undertaker. Where are you GETTING these guys?"

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:26

the last time anyone asked the brothers when their last communion was they both jsut started laughingtaker managed a "you're new here" and kane struggled out a "welcome to the valley" and then they just left

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:27

Kane and Taker area little odd but most of the valley doesn’t mind ‘em

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:27

they usually keep to themselves

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:28

Also idk Texas’ hunting season but it must be Big Important

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:28

and when there are things the sheriff can't or won't deal withpeople go to them

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:29

And honestly since it’s such a small town, 90% of problems are resolved before the police are even calledEveryone knows everyone and that includes for grandma—

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:29

you cannot send young priests to death valley, they see one hairless cat that speaks in tongues and suddenly they're abandoning their vows to live in isolation somewhere in norway like that'd help anything

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:30

Oh right it’s close to the border isn’t it?

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:30

the entire town's just at a gateway to hell, Weird Things Happen There

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:30

Yeah the one Catholic Church in the area is supported by the local Hispanic population and they can take anything

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:30

most if not all of the really dangerous stuff is kept inside the yardbut weird shit's the norm

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:30

One of the demons is going to get hit with a sandal

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:31

all the catholic priests are either old guys who used to be exorcists in rome, local tex-mex lads with brujah aunties or kids who grew up close to the yard in general and have Seen Some Shit and aren't afraid of anything

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:31

"Abuelita, the statue out front is singing again!" "Tell it to shut up, my soap opera is on!" "Senior Statue, Abuelita says to be quiet. She got new shoes." (statue stops)

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:32

Yeah that’s itYou got itIt’s the Calvinists that you gotta worry about, every time there’s a new minister he can get uppity but usually he gets over it pretty quick

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:33

the fuckin' dudes from rome add an interesting flaire to the local culture and accenttaker's only demand is they keep their dove(s) away from his ravens

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:33

At least one of the priests is Taker’s drinking buddy and will come out to the yard for a beer or two

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:34

taker actually likes hanging out at one of the only local biker-aesthetic bars if he's looking for a drinking partnerit's called the Rattler and it's owned by his dad's best friendincidentally, the only local who went to baby adam's funeral aside from paul

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:34

one of the old romans has a dog that can recite the lord's prayer in the voice of a child if you give it a milk bone but he generally encourages people NOT to do that

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:35

Jesus said ‘drink wine’ and the Catholics said ‘if you insist’ and never looked back

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:35

the weirdest thing is he can't remember if it always did thator if it's a new thing since coming to the valleyOH and then there are the druids

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:38

the local stray cats can reliably tell you the time of day but they will be able to prowl around in your dreams for a week after

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:39

I wanna dream about kiddies :VMaybe they can help Xion sleep :/Also what is with all the talking animalsAlso I wanna submit that the town Librarian has seen it All and cannot be fazed at this pointIf you ask her for dark magic books she’ll point you to the back right corner

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:40

animals make convenient hosts for entities because they don't have higher thought and can be overwhelmed easily

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:40

It works great until the cat you possessed gets distracted by a laser pointer

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:41

cats are an exception because they can see and touch all planes and do harm to spirits

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:41

that's one of the reasons kane chose therapy catMAN NOW I WANNA WRITE UP A LIST OF WEIRD SHIT IN THE YARD AND TOWN BUT I HAVE DRAFTS

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:42

some dogs are bred from guardian stock and can perform similar actions but its hard to find one cause of diluted bloodlines

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:43

i also need you all to know that when taker came back to life fully after the ministryred hair and more relaxed and vocal than normalit took weeks for the locals to realize it was the same guy

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 15:43

HA

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 15:43

And also for some reason he doesn’t sound like he gargles rocks

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 15:43

another week for them to debate about whether or not he as possessedand a day to decide "eh"

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:33

if you see this dog, DO NOT ask it to speak

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 17:35

OH A GOOD BOY

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:35

THE BEST BOY

Gina (´-ω-`)Last Saturday at 17:35

jay and i would not survivebut we would pet the dogso who wins?

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:36

i've been dead inside for years it's no dif

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:36

pet dog: finebut be careful what tricks you try and get it to do

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:38

whats his name

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:39

probably something like "angelico"

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:39

toddbot how gucci is angelico

ToddBotBOTLast Saturday at 17:39

Angelico is 26% gucci.

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:40

fuck you todd

ToddBotBOTLast Saturday at 17:40

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:40

no respectfallout76 sucks

ToddBotBOTLast Saturday at 17:40

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:40

hey todd

ToddBotBOTLast Saturday at 17:40

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:40

new vegas was the best game

ToddBotBOTLast Saturday at 17:40

https://i.imgur.com/fK7zKeq.jpg

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:40

i love angelicodoes he bork

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:41

very delicately

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:41

:o

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:41

polite smol bork

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:42

if i ask him to speak what he do

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:43

tells you that hubris will be the downfall of man

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:45

he's not wrong

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:45

the church of st peter is an empty box! god's eye has turned from man!

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:45

taker: i'll drink to that (throws him jerky)

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:46

angelico has an amputated tail but he will do a full body wiggle for jerky

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:46

where him tail go :(

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:47

probably got cut off for medical reasonshe strikes me as a dog who got hit by a car once or twice

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:48

D:poor baby

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:54

he's probably happy and healthy otherwise

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:54

did one of those car hits happen in the valleyor did he just start talking with likeno cause

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:57

UNCLEARbut he is a happy goofy dog otherwiseand his owner adores him

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 17:58

AS HE SHOULD

84% CURSE BY VOLUMELast Saturday at 17:59

well loved by the whole neighbourhood but REAL weird to run into at times for obvious reasons

MilkshakeLast Saturday at 18:04

Hi i would die for angelico

Convicted BirdererLast Saturday at 18:04

taker does in fact give him a treat whenever he sees himhe lovs doggos....

[theinsanecrayonbox]

Dadlantis/Knitwits

well, i hope these are the right reviews for last night’s episodes. TVGuide said it should be Dimmsdale’s Got Talent (which belongs with Knitwits), but butch said it was Dadlantis and he was right the last time concerning Crockin the House so...

Dadlantis:

Mermaid!Timmy on the titlecard, like whaaaaat???? What’s with the sudden influx of putting Timmy into “girl attire”?? Nothing wrong with it, but it just seems so far left field and unprompted. Yeah we had it happen once or twice in the past as a gag, but how many episodes has it happened in now in this one season alone?? (no seriously, since this is an episode I found leaked, I don’t know which episodes have aired before this one has, so my numbers are skewed). It just seems weird to suddenly be a thing…

 Ok I loved how they brought back the old gaming music…until I saw the game. I know it’s probably meant as a Mario spoof in part, but still…not even 5 seconds into the episode and toilet humor…uhg! The music had me so pumped, then you ruined it.

 I actually love the plot setup. Mundane problem: clean up the ocean science project. Chloe deciding to use her magic to make it harder but do better, and Tim going “yeah no, I’m lazy”. It’s great! Also love that Chloe believes in mermaids ^^ (she didn’t believe in aliens so…can’t guarantee she’ll believe in any sort of cryptid)

 The fishbowl=toilet though…yeah…proper fish care is totally important, but another toilet joke so soon…uhg…

 It’s the return of Dad’s bongos! Idk about the “abandoned mine shaft your mother hid them in” was really necessary, but I’ll let it slide for a good call back.  Bongo-quake though…not as good, but I’ll still let it slide, because maybe it’s plot device

 Pointless Crocker, take a shot (thank ra I don’t drink or these episodes would kill me some days…)

 Oh wow, we get some interior looks at the Turner house. That’s really neat! We do rarely see any hallways, and I think we’ve only seen Mom and Dad’s room like twice. We need a good floor plan, just saying

*files away “Bongo-lodesh” for Superverse purposes later…*

 I did like Dad’s whole running away speech. It was very 7 year old, but it was cute and funny. And spare ribs are so totally worth coming back for lol

 And he actually becomes mermaid-nice!! Accidentally called “Tina”, ok…called a knockout ^^;;; … “get out of this bikini top” lol.  But you know, since Chloe wished they were mermaids it totally makes sense, so I like it. Tina Turntrout now has to be a thing.

 Neptuna King of Atlantis??? What happened to Greg?? Is he no longer in charge? Was he not in charge to begin with? Are these a new faction of merfolks because they are red finned, whereas Greg’s people were all green??? I mean Neptuna has the right skintone and hair colors/styles to fit in Wet Willie…and Gary even has Dwight’s hair style…

 Also, bit creepy how everyone keeps saying Tim’s such a pretty mermaid…though I guess he is wearing the seashell bra so he has a bust whereas Chloe’s got a band and it’s flat, so that makes sense ^^; “no dude I’m a dude” yeah…you’re probably going to end up as a seahorse now man ^^;; but then trying to hook up prince lonely Gary with Timmy ^^; wow. I mean I love it, still a tad creepy, but think of all the development this gives the Superverse for undersea lands

 Scalding hot soup, in a bowl, underwater…well I guess we’re using Spongebob logic here

 “We’re about to get a bad grade on our science project AND your dad’s about to be eaten by a clam! I don’t know which is worse!!” Chloe subscribes to the Hermione method of prioritizing lol

 “I could end up the world’s biggest pearl” I feel like that’s the door opening for a SU mashup

 I love how Tim and Chloe were on eth same page about the plan even before saying it. They really are starting to get one another aren’t they.

 Dad’s list of demands is a cliche gag, but we’ll roll with it. As is the ending; of course what caused the problem in the first place is what fixes it, and thus Dad learns nothing from his mistakes because in saving the day he is validated as right and nothing wrong he did before counts anymore

 “You get to marry Gary” lol yeah no *still jots notes about Gary down for Superverse*

 And more pointless Crocker, oh boy…but hey another call back to Dad’s bongo cds

 So this episode was actually very enjoyable! Even though it messes up previous canons (why did no one in Atlantis recognize Cosmo as the great destroyer?? Is this a different Atlantis then?? (I’m voting yes) because it’s established so many times he ruined Atlantis, it just feels wrong not to address that…the plot itself was sort of contrived, but it was fun enough. Also mermaid!Timmy was great.

 I am totally having these red merfolks be a different faction from the green merfolk in Superverse, so be prepared for Dwight to get his “Black Manta” at some point now, and by some point I mean later. be on the lookout

Knitt-Wits:

Ok I admit, after seeing the title for this one I got sort of excited, because I enjoy knitting. The thought of Chloe trying to rope Tim into knitting was me pumped…and then I read the synopsis, and…yeah, not the case. But I’m still looking forward to seeing what does happen at least…

 That is a really nice pillow fort, like for reals. Also got a giggle out of “Sir Sucks-a-lot”

 Heehee Chloe not wanting to be a “damsel in distress” because she’s a “strong and empowered woman of the new millennium”. I like it, it shows character, but like, we have seen her as a damsel in distress a few times, so it shows something she’s wanting to overcome too. But like, I always try to show Chloe as a capable young adult, so it’s nice that the sentiment is shared. And back to Timmy in drag. I am liking the new girly hair though *takes notes* but their matching outfits are cute ^^

 Dad blatantly ignoring/glossing over the “strange talking inanimate objects” yup…

 Bathroom joke…take a shot

 But Chloe sweetie, that 7 degrees of separation was a slight stretch…but I totally relate to that! Thoughts going a mile a minute, so you jump from one thing to the next and it doesn’t seem connected but is. Also, who knew Chloe wanted to sing (karaoke battles with Francis to BrittneyBrittney songs seems far more plausible now)

 And welcome to the plot. Dad can’t spell so they go on a knitting cruise instead of a knight cruise. Contrive plot? Oh yeah. But let’s see how it plays out…

 50 shades pun, omr ^^;;; it’s a good one though, so points

 OH! It’s her one-woman show!! I totally forgot about that from Nuts and Dangerous. Du Chloe wants to be a singer, silly brain

 So now Cosmo and Wanda want to renew their vows just like Mom and Dad. Hm….could this be a call back to the fact that their wedding anniversaries are supposed to be the same day??? Probably not, since that factoid had been retconned once I think, but still

 Random Wandissimo???? O.o when did he start wearing a belt…and also, why are you even here??? I mean, nice to see you because it’s been AGES, but really dude? Why??? Butt joke! But man, has Wandissimo really been reduced to a one-note character…he’s getting into (or even past) stalker-territory like Tootie was, and we all know what happened to her…

 Mr .Bickles???? Wow, we’re just dragging back all the old flamboyant characters aren’t we (so where is my Sanjay??)

 Random Catman???? How many more characters can we cram into this??? I mean, at least Catman makes sense, since he’s the right age for this, and all eth yarn. But holy cameos Catman! And Wandergal and Don return too…huh…GAAAAHHHH!!! THEY CHANGED WANDERGAL’S COLORS!!!!! I know I already freaked about this, but that is a SERIOUS change, not “Veronica’s eyes are pink for 5 frames” change, but she’s like a completely DIFFERENT character with those colors. That’s just WRONG! She looks like the granny version of Goldenlocks now color wise, and that is wrong! I just…UHG! Can’t even stay on model when you created the character not but a handful of episodes earlier. Major point loss here >> (this might have just ruined the whole episode for me)

 Too many plots with separate problems. So yes Tim give us the blanket wish to fix everything…but also probably make it worse…oh no, it actually made it better for once. Nice.

 And Catman marries (not really) Wandergal in the end?? Idk how legally binding that is since he’s a 10-12 year old boy, just saying…

 So over all, this was 110% filler. It started off cute and tolerateable, but had far too many plot threads, too many pointless/random characters, and they colored Wandergal incorrectly.

I feel putting these two episodes together was a very bad choice. Neither of them are super great, and when you put them together, it’s just a big let down. Not that Dimmsdale’s Got Talent balances Knitwits, but Chloe Rules is a pretty good one. but i guess looking at their counter episodes, they went and skipped all the Kevin episodes because Kevin hasn’t been revealed yet. which is so stupid. just give up Kevin already and stop screwing up the airing order.