#crazy how this was the end of the episode and the series and they ended up happily ever after

[hetalian-veteran]

Kinda random, but it's so wild to me whenever I still see people hating on the Hetalia fandom literal years after the fandom's heyday.

And I just...? Bro, I know the fandom could get nuts back in the day, believe me, I was there. I was in the trenches. It was fun, but there was definitely some crazy here and there.

But as for the Hetalia fandom today?

This is one of the most chill and accepting fandoms I've ever been a part of. I feel like we're all just sitting around, chilling, talking, and reminiscing about this series and characters that have lived rent-free in our heads for years.

I made a post a little while ago talking about how the Hetalia fans of today are just a bunch of adults sitting around a fire and drinking. I initially made it as a joke, pretending that we're a bunch of tried war veterans.

But you know what? If I had the money, I'd bring every single Hetalian on this website to my small town and we'd have a giant freakin' bonfire. We'd get together wearing our cosplays and/or merch and come armed with our favorite drinks and snacks.

We'd open the event by toasting with our boots high in the air. We can all hang out around the fire during the day, blasting the character songs from the biggest loudspeaker we can find and dance around like Italy. We can sit around and chat about our favorite characters, ships, episodes, etc.

I'd talk to the drive-in movie theater here in town to see if I can get them to do a screening of the Hetalia: Paint it White! movie later that night.

And then we'd all set up tents in one of the many surrounding fields in the area and have the world's biggest and most absurd slumber party imaginable.

And at the end of it all? We'd do a giant group picture together. All of us.

(Not to mention that we'd have to upload all of our pictures to a shared folder because holy crap I feel like the pics from a get-together like this would be wild).

[realmsalot]

I've been obsessed with Relativity Falls au for some reason lately so of course I've been turning around my own version in my head lately. And with Fiddleford I keep flip flopping on who I would switch him because there are many good options. Like

Fiddleford <> Pacifica:

This seems to be the most popular option, I've seen many old woman Pacifica designs, but I personally cannot see McGucket be the snotty rich kid that Pacifica was at the start. I CAN see how he could be rich (Tate McGucket probably invented something and got a lot of money for it) but CAN'T see him be anyway snotty about it. I think the best way to make Fiddleford fit this role is through a series of misunderstandings. He is trying SO HARD to be nice to these twin brothers who are spending their summer in Gravity Falls and he just keeps messing up. He tries to make a robot to help them out but it end up turning evil and they assume that it was ment to sabotage them from the start. He tries to have a nice conversation with them but because he's rich he's just out touch enough to come off rude and show offy. FIDDS IS TRYING TO BE NICE FROM THE START!

Fiddleford <> Candy

It is easily the second most popular option here. There really isn't much to say with this one it's probably the one that makes the most sense. I can easily see Candy going to Backupsmore and telling Dipper/Mabel about the weird things shes seen in Gravity Falls. The idea that Stanley and Fidds became friends first before Ford and Fidds is interesting. My main grip with it is that if we're going with the version where Dipper is swapped with Ford, it implies that Mable and Candy never really became friends in this universe, which I find really sad. Honestly I think that the main reason this swap exists in that context is because of that one episode were they go on a road trip and Candy got crush on Dipper mixed with fact that many people ship FiddleAuthor.

Fiddleford <> Soos

Hear me out, hear me OUT! I've seen a few versions where even when Soos' Grandma is swapped with Soos, they also add Fidds as a handyman at the Shack anyways. But why not go the whole way, ya'know? Soos was a friend that Dipper met and shared a dorm with in Backupsmore. Soos was still older than Dipper. Soos and Melody were already married with a kid on the way, and Soos was also Gravity Falls' local handyman. He decided to get college and get like a mechanical engineering degree or maybe a trade in something there because even in the small town of Gravity Falls technology was only getting more and more complicated and Soos wanted to be able to keep up so he can keep making money for his family by fixing things. During their time at Backupsmore, Soos would tell Dipper about some of the crazy things he's seen living in Gravity Falls, and that inspires Dipper to go study it after college. And then the rest of that rolls out predictably. I can easily (and sadly) see Soos becoming the local kook. I imagine that it will also be much sadder for the locals to see Soos acting up because many of them have memories of him coming to fix their microwaves and stuff. And as for Fidds, he's the Mystery Shack's handyman. You can make him around the same age as the Stan twins, we know that in cannon that Soos started working there around that age, so he doesn't have to be Soos' cannon age. I think this works best with Dipper and Ford switching places because in cannon Dipper and Soos were friends, so it kinda easily transfers, ya'know. I've put a lot in this one.

And uh yeah that's my incoherent ramblings...

[thebadjoe]

BAD JOE'S DRDT CH.2 CRIME SOLVING THEORY FINALE

Hello! It's me again, the pretend-detective-that-will-prove-once-and-for-all-that-my-solution-is-the-closest-to-the-truth.

Oooo boy, we're getting very close to the end with chapter 2, eh? Man... episode 14... that was quite the episode!

I got a lot to talk about, so I'll try not to waste too much time this time around. And of course, this is MAJOR SPOILERS WARNING OF DANGANRONPA DESPAIR TIME CHAPTER 2.

Let's talk!

As you can see in the title, this is pretty much the last time I'll be talking about my theory for good. The reason as to why should be obvious. We're getting really close to the end of the chapter as well as getting close to having the truth revealed by the series itself.

So in other words, this is my very last attempt at solving the murder mystery. So since this is most likely my last time (until there's another murder mystery I want to solve), I better go out with a bang, right? :D

For those who read part 5, it's mostly similar as part 5, but I added a few more things to support my theory. The main difference will be things that I really have to fix.

Anyways... this latest episode revealed a lot of things. A lot of these things are affected by my theory too. I will split those in three categories : The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

The Good

Then MonoTV explains that broken and missing things take longer to replace and...

So there you have it ladies and gentlemen. It is now confirmed 100% that the tape was truly missing since the murder attempt. We could even say that because of this on top of how the narrative is going with this episode, there is no other form of grippy tape inside this killing aside from the one that came from the pull up bar.

Phew! I'm so glad it's finally cleared up, even though it should've been so obvious! (Well, the clue of when the tape was missing was subtle, but you get what I mean, right?)

It was honestly blowing my mind when people were claiming crazy things about the tape... such as "Well, it's a design error by the dev! There's supposed to be a tape there, they just forgot about it!"

So, I'm actually glad and happy that I was absolutely right on that matter, especially since I was the first person who vocally pointed out the missing tape ever since... episode 9, I believe?

It's possible that there were a few people who noticed it before me or around the same time as me, but I don't recall seeing anyone else posting about it. Nonetheless, for those like me who discovered the moment of the missing tape a long time ago? Honestly, kudos to y'all! Amazing job!

Another thing that's also considered good for me is something regarding the attempted murder that I deduced correctly.

"Ace had woken up and was struggling"

I deduced that at some point during the attempted murder, Ace woke up. The reason why I firmly believed that was the case is because of this picture!

If you take a closer look, you can see that there's blood on Ace's fingers. Since those are not finger injuries nor would Nico have a reason to stain Ace's fingers with blood, then the only logical conclusions would be that he got blood on his fingers because he touched his neck wounds, therefore, he woke up at some point during the murder attempt.

Another W for me, let's go! Hurray! Speaking of W... another good thing for my theory happened. In regards to Eden being innocent because the BDA triggered when Teruko, Eden and Whit saw the body at the same time.

YES! FUCKIN YES!!! THANK YOU DAVID! THANK YOU FOR SAYING THOSE WORDS THAT I WANTED TO HEAR SO BAD! I LOVE YOU, BUT ONLY AS LONG DISTANCE FRIENDS!

You guys have no idea how much it heavily supports my theory thanks to what he just said. It was also something that I deduced for a very long time too! There's of course a lot to talk about on this matter, which I will discuss another time.

But for now, let me savor what I consider to be the biggest W of my crime solving theory of this murder case. Things are looking really good for me.

But of course, I have other problems that crossed my way in exchange, so let me show you what I mean.

The Bad

Let's start with the elephant in the room. Nico is sole person responsible for the attempted murder of Ace.

Before I forget, here's my theory post as reference so that you can have a fair idea of what's been debunked.

Anyways, this truth shatters a good chunk of my theory post, especially regarding the attempted murder itself. Because... according to my theory, I thought that the person responsible for the attempted murder was the same culprit as whoever killed Arei. Thinking it was Eden who did the attempted murder on Ace.

But this theory of mine on that matter has sadly been completely denied. Eden did not attempt murder on Ace, that much is a fact that I can't ignore.

But that's not all. It's practically confirmed that the wire found in the gym was indeed Hu's custom weapon.

This shut downs my idea that Eden must've gathered some kind of wire inside a grandfather clock.

I'm well aware that I was kinda pushing it with this idea (even though there were a conversation supporting this idea), but mannnnn.... IMAGINE HOW FRIGGIN SICK IT WOULD'VE BEEN IF THAT WAS ACTUALLY WHAT HAPPENED?! IT WOULD'VE BEEN SUCH A 1000 IQ MOVE ON MY END!!!

Haha! Sorry! I got the hype get the best of me there! I mean, to be fair... I was under the assumption that Eden's must've done the deed and that she must've gathered that wire some other way. You can't fault me for being this creative!

But at the very least, from this narrative, we can deduce that the DRDT Dev may not try to pull a move where we need to imagine something that could've existed somewhere, they probably never intend to make us go for something far-fetched unless there's enough clues to suggest it. I think that will be something very important to remember whenever we get to watch chapter 3 in a future time.

Moving on!

Nico is the person responsible for stealing the turpentine.

This may not seem much at first, but it's actually very bad for my theory. Reason why is that to have my Eden!Culprit theory work, I need a way for Eden to subdue Arei in some shape or form.

The best way to do it would be by knocking her out with the turpentine, but unfortunately for me, Eden initially didn't have access to the turpentine. Nico did. This means that I lost my prime way for Eden to subdue Arei.

Eden obviously can't overpower Arei for obvious reasons... on top of having no signs of struggle on Eden and Arei's body like bruises and such.

So because of it, I need to figure out a way for Eden to be able subdue Arei without having to steal the turpentine as it was Nico who stole it initially. I'll discuss more about it later.

There is also another problem with my theory, not something the episode directly showed, but it's still very noteworthy. Since Eden is not the culprit behind the attempted murder of Ace, my plan of having Arei locked up and hidden in the relaxation room no longer works anymore. Therefore, I currently don't have a way to explain the purpose of the ball of clothes since my whole murder attempt theory is crushed.

So these are the bads, one of them being a lot more problematic than the others. Anyways, I don't even think that's the worst of it all. The worst comes with...

The Ugly

"It's you two, isn't it?"

I'm happy that we finally got Teruko to actually accuse someone... but NOT LIKE THIS!!!

God friggin dammit!

I get it though. I understand why the creator did that. It gives a lot more suspense and a much better reveal at the end of it all, but aaaaggghhh! This is literally the worst case scenario!

Instead of having people try to figure out why this one person is the culprit and how they did it, we now have the community practically split in two to decide which one between Ace or Eden is the culprit of the murder case.

Ugh.... what a pain in the ass! I can't believe you've done this, DRDT dev! Not giving us the final answer until the very end. I will admit though... that was very unexpected and a very cool twist. That makes it much different from what we're used to see in the dangans and fangans! So yeah... well played, dev! But you should know by now... you're not fooling me with this. I know very well what the heck happened behind this murder case! I remain undaunted.

So are you saying that...

Yes... I still believe that Eden is the culprit behind the murder case of Arei. Ace has nothing to do with the murder of Arei and there's absolutely no one else but these two suspects who could've possibly commited murder.

I'm sorry to say this to the people who believe that a third party is responsible for the murder, but that's just impossible. Only these two could've taken the tape and they had absolutely no reason to give it to someone else. Nor did they get it stolen.

Otherwise, why would they not reveal it at all? It wouldn't make sense no matter how you put it. Not only that, but it would be so unsatisfying of a plot twist especially considering that with all the clues we've been given so far, only the people in the gym at a specific time could've taken it, which still comes down to Ace and Eden.

It's also practically confirmed that there's no other source of grippy tape. I understand that you guys are trying to do this because there's a lot of issues with solving the case if eitheir Ace or Eden is the culprit, but instead of going for an unrealistic scenario of who else could've done it, you guys need to figure out how eitheir of these two suspects managed to pull it off despite these problems!

And that's exactly why I'm still dead set on accusing Eden. Because despite all these problems I've encountered since the beginning of it all, I figured out a lot of ways to solve these issues and it's going to be the same thing here. These new problems I have encountered... I will solve them... all of them!

Therefore, being open-minded is crucial in solving this murder case, a complex one at that!

Alright, with these news out of the way, it's finally time for me to solve this murder case! Although, unlike the giant recap that I did on part 5, I'm not going to do that. I will begin by discussing with you all the biggest mystery of this entire murder case.

The Biggest Mystery?!

What are you talking about? Are you referring to the fishes? The broken lights? The ball of clothes? Their murder motive?

Nope! There is something that's been brought up very few times at the very beginning of the trial and never again... even though there's something seriously strange about it.

(I'm sure there's other moments where this was brought up, but I couldn't find them.)

But yeah... there are two suspiciously strange things about this (that people simply brushed it off as nothing wrong happened) and I seriously think we need to look into this.

During lunchtime of the day before the BDA, Arei was seen in the cafeteria, but didn't utter a single word.

Aside from the "conversation between Arei and David in the relaxation room", no one saw Arei from lunchtime up until the BDA.

Let's face it... Arei, who's usually a loudmouth, didn't say a single thing at lunch? That's just incredibly weird! It doesn't make sense! You guys know very well that she would, at the very least, say something mean or troll someone at least slightly.

But even weirder than that is the fact that no one else saw her since lunchtime! There is absolutely no way that Arei would've spent the rest of the day eitheir hiding herself in her dorm or just simply avoiding contact on anyone. That is just so out of character!

Well... maybe Arei was deeply concerned by David's actual secret and was being secluded up until it was the right time to visit David. I mean, David and Ace clearly saw her that evening, so it's fine, right?

Yeah, I don't think so. Let's say she was deeply concerned by David's secret since lunch, why didn't she try to contact David much sooner than that? Doesn't quite make sense now, doesn't it?

Oh! I know! She was spending time with Eden because they're friends now, right?

I'm sorry, but that's not gonna work eitheir. Let's say Eden was the culprit in that scenario... why would Eden lie about not seeing her since lunch?

Well... suspicions would've been thrown at her, that's why.

And why would that be the case? Remember that during that day, Eden spent time with Hu from the evening up until the night time. And since we're under the assumption that the murder occured in the morning of day 4 (the day of the BDA) and that she spent time with Hu as said earlier, her supposed time spent with Arei in the afternoon would be irrelevant to the murder case!

Besides, wouldn't someone at least have noticed that the two of them were spending time together in the afternoon?

And even if we were to presume that Ace is the killer there, it's the exact same thing! Eden would have absolutely no reason to lie about spending time with Arei if that were the case.

Well, maybe Ace intimidated Arei and stayed quiet this whole time because of it!

...really? We all know very well that there's no way Ace would be able to intimidate Arei, of all people!

Then maybe-

I'll stop you there! Let's face it, there's no normal reasons to explain why Arei didn't talk at lunch nor why she was missing for a considerable amount of time. Besides, if it was something irrevelant or completly mundane about what was happening with Arei, what would be the point of doing all of that? Why make it seem like it was a mystery if "nothing special" happened.

I'm sorry, but it just simply doesn't make sense. Especially if the fact that she was missing was brought up multiple times. There is no way that this is unimportant, no matter how you look at it!

This is also one of the reasons why I firmly believe that Ace is not the culprit. It is impossible to give a reasonable answer to this mystery if you go for the Ace!Culprit route.

It's unsolvable! You can't solve it even with Eden as the culprit!

No! That's wrong!

For those who read part 5, I'm sure you know already what the answer to that is. As for everyone else, there is a very interesting and logical way to solve this mystery.

But before I reveal it, let me first bring back a topic from earlier that I wanted to talk about.

David Chiem...

Okay... so what? He's clearly lying about it, as stated by Nico and J!

And why would you assume that he's lying? Is it because he's a lying and manipulative asshole? Is it because you don't believe in anything he says? Is it because you don't understand him? Well... to be fair... he's rather complex and a bit hard to understand his gameplan, however...

Doesn't that statement feel too important to simply disregard it? I'm not just saying this because his quote is in gold and bolded text, but also because of the timing and what he said earlier.

Also... shortly after that, after he asked Teruko, Whit and Eden if they saw the body at the same time and that Teruko answered with "What are you getting at?", here's how he behaves...

Isn't it peculiar? Like... doesn't it feel like there's a sense of emergency behind his defense and reaction? It's almost like... he's been waiting for the right moment to reveal that piece of information. Whether he wants to help or just want to make Teruko despair for the sake of exposing Eden as the culprit, it doesn't matter. He wanted to reveal that information.

His statement that he saw the body first is clearly wrong because he couldn't have seen the body in the morning, he had an alibi at 7:30 AM and it's physically impossible for David to instantly search the playground, find the body, do nothing and go back without being seen by eitheir Teruko, Whit or Eden.

Well, of course, he's lying about seeing the body in the morning. It's literally impossible.

Huh? But why are you insisting that-

David is the first person to find the body, but he discovered it at an earlier time. It doesn't make sense for anyone else to have found the body first. Otherwise, they wouldn't have hidden this piece of information at all, there's no reason to. But if we're talking about David however... it's whole different story. I also have plenty ways to support the idea that he found the body much earlier.

This is after Ace tells the group what he witnessed and after David gets his secret exposed and decides to reveal himself.

Ace claimed that he witnessed David and Arei having a conversation about David's secret during the evening, the day after the attempted murder.

David claims that he's a lying piece of shit and an unreliable witness.

Ace couldn't possibly have lied about the secret he heard from the conversation since that was indeed David's secret. So what else could David be referring to when he claimed that Ace is lying?

Lying about where he heard the conversation wouldn't make sense eitheir, it wouldn't really change much. And we already know for a fact that David visited the relaxation room that day.

Therefore, by process of elimination, the logical deduction would be that Ace lied about when he heard that conversation. Also, doesn't that weirdly coincide with the reveal that he found the body first?

So if you match his body discovery information with the logical possibility that Ace lied about when he heard the conversation with also David's confession that he did indeed meet with Arei that evening without revealing what the conversation was about, we get this amazing solution : David didn't have a conversation with Arei in the evening of the day 3. He had a conversation with her in the evening of day 2 instead, the day of the attempted murder on Ace. David found Arei's corpse in the relaxation room in the evening of day 3.

I know I had many people who used to believe that this can't be true and that David is lying about his claim that Ace's a liar and all that... but quite frankly... can you still make that claim after watching episode 13 AND 14?

In episode 13, we learn from David's memory flashback that there was more to David and Arei's conversation than what Ace let on, which already gives a sign that Ace is hiding something.

And in episode 14, there's of course the reveal that David was the first person to find the body. Let's be real here everyone. I seriously doubt that this is a mere coincidence after all this time.

Anyways, now that I've explained my point regarding David, it is time to connect the dots!

Connecting the dots...

Going back to the biggest mystery...

As I said before, I stated that there's a way to solve this mystery with Eden as the culprit. There's also a very good reason why I brought up the idea that David must've found the body at a much earlier time.

Let's think back on the mysteries regarding Arei.

She did not talk at lunch and she was never seen again since then.

We've already established that it wouldn't make sense for her to stay silent and not be seen again for a long period of time. So what would be the most logical way to explain that discrepancy?

Something wrong happened to Arei that day. If you think back on my idea regarding David, he found Arei's body in the evening of day 3. Then, if you combine that with the fact that Arei was mysteriously missing since lunchtime, we can then deduce that Arei was actually dead for quite some time. It would make sense to deduce that Arei must've been dead during the whole time she was missing.

But Ace witnessed the conversation betwee-

Nope! Remember, I made the deduction that Ace lied about when he witnessed the conversation. He most likely witnessed the conversation happening in the evening of day 2. Therefore, Arei was alive during the evening of day 2.

(FYI, by day 2, I mean the day of the attempted murder while day 3 refers to the day after the attempted murder. Day 4 is the day of the BDA)

Okay, but what does that have to do with Eden being the only culprit that can explain the mystery behind it all?

Don't worry, I'm getting there.

So with the idea that Arei was already at least dead after lunch, it changes a lot of things, but it still doesn't answer the other oddity regarding Arei... Why was she being silent during lunch time?

Before I propose the crazy (and repeated) idea, let me share a fact with you all. During lunch time, Eden was nowhere to be seen in the cafeteria.

Combine everything I've shown you and then we get this beautiful conclusion : Arei was silent during lunch time because that was not Arei. It was Eden disguised as Arei. Arei was already dead during lunch time.

I'm sure you have a lot of questions or things to object to this, but let me first state that it would perfectly explain a lot of things. Not only would it solve perfectly that big mystery I've just shown, but it would also explain why David claimed that he was the first person to find the body. It would also explain this little goofy event in the morning of day 3.

To give a small recap, Teruko wakes up at 8:00 AM, but still feels sleepy. So she's like "5 more minutes."

Then, we get a black screen saying "4 hours later", so she ends up waking up at around noon instead. Funny 5 more minutes turns into oversleeping for hours instead joke, that one! (Let's face it, it's relatable)

Anyways, this little scene right there could be an extremely subtle way to indicate that Arei actually died in the morning of day 3 and they made us unable to witness her death thanks to Teruko oversleeping. It also helps with camouflaging the possibility that Eden was taking the time to set up her disguise trick.

But if you have issues with the disguise trick, I've already explained it many times in part 5 with clues and hints found throughout the series on top of reminding everyone that this is a work of fiction, so as long as there's plenty evidence to suggest it, then it can be possible.

So for that to work, Eden needed to kill Arei in the morning of day 3. So first, she would need to sneakily knock her out with turpentine as it is the only way to-

HAH! YOU IDIOT! IT CAN'T WORK!! IT WAS NICO WHO HAD THE TURPENTINE! HOW COULD EDEN POSSIBLY GET HER HANDS ON IT?! YOUR THEORY STINKS!

Ah, right... the turpentine! Nico stole it from Rose...

That's no problem! Eden got her hands on the turpentine anyways!

WHAT?!?!

Turpentine, where are you?!

You're not possibly suggesting that there was a second turpentine, RIGHT?!?!

Of course not! I'm not that crazy! Come on now! Do you really think I'd make such a claim even though I made the claim that there doesn't exist any other source of grippy tape aside from what we've seen thus far? The same applies with the turpentine.

It is true that the fact that Nico had their hands on the turpentine first is truly troublesome... but then I learned some more facts about the case and realised that there is indeed a way for Eden to get her hands on the turpentine.

That's impossible! Nico had their hands on it!

Nico may have gotten their hands on the turpentine first, but did they actually keep it forever?

Think about it. What else do we know about the attempted murder that we know is true and confirmed by Nico themselves? Nico stole Hu's custom weapon : the wires.

And what was the reason for stealing the wires? To pin the murder on Hu. They were trying to get away with murder, after all.

Now, if we follow that logic, there is also another way to further pin the blame on Hu. Nico could've dropped the turpentine in the dress room, close by Hu's old uniform. It's also possible that they used some of Hu's clothes to knock Ace unconscious with the turpentine.

That way, if the crime actually succeeded, then there would be much more than Hu's wires to pin her as the culprit. But alas, as we all know, Nico's murder attempt failed. So whatever happened to the turpentine in that scenario?

Nico most likely didn't run back to the dress room to grab it back, that's for sure. Which means that in that scenario, from the time Nico knocked Ace unconscious up until Teruko runs into Eden in the dressing room, Eden had an opportunity to grab the turpentine that Nico might've purposefully dropped in that room.

But how could she possibly know that there was turpentine in here?

That's the thing. I don't think she knew that she'd find the turpentine here... well... unless she saw Nico knocking Ace out and has been quietly sneaking since then.

Why would she even bother going there this late at night to somehow stumble on the turpentine if she didn't know that she'd find it here to begin with? That makes no sense.

You're right, it wouldn't make sense. If anything, that was simply an incredible coincidence that she managed to find turpentine, something that she would clearly need to succeed in her murder plan.

I don't get it! If finding the turpentine was mere coincidence, then what was the point of Eden visiting the dress room this late at night?

Initially, before episode 14 was released, I thought for sure that she was there because she orchestrated both crimes on top of locking Arei inside the relaxation room during nighttime. However, both of these ideas are denied.

So by eliminating the impossible, only one truth remains : Eden needed to place Hu's and Teruko's old clothes inside the relaxation room before 10 pm so that they can get covered in sticky starch next morning.

It is a known fact that the "ball of clothes" is covered in starch. We also know that the only source of information we have that could potentially have a source of starch is from the enriched formula of the water misting of that plants for the relaxation room. We also know for a fact that Eden was indeed in the dressing room past 10 pm on day 2.

I highly doubt that she went there late at night only for the sake of being nice and retrieving Teruko's spare uniforms. Therefore, the only way to explain her suspicious presence in that room is if we were to believe that she's the person responsible for the "ball of clothes".

There is no other logical or reasonable way to explain it. This is the only conclusion I could arrive at. Therefore, it has to be the truth!

Alright then... what was Eden trying to do with these starched clothes then? What was her plan?

At the time I'm currently typing this... I do not know.

WHHHHHAAAT?! YOU DON'T KNOW?!?!

That's right... I don't know yet. I have a few ideas, but I don't like them just yet. So by the time I keep working on this post, I'll figure out a proper solution, I promise.

What are you saying?! Are you seriously trying to solve this problem as you are writing your theory post?!

...That's right... I'm still working on it as I'm typing this. But pay no mind to it, the solution will come to me eventually, I'm pretty sure!

...You are out of your mind, you know that?

Yeah... I know. For now, let's just say that having the clothes in that room so that they get starched was very essential in her plan for unknown reasons. At the very least, I found a reasonable way to explain how she get her hands on the turpentine.

For that matter, I know there were people asking me why Eden would even bother grabbing the tape. The answer is fairly simple. It was very convenient for her to get her hands on the tape as it would be necessary in her murder scheme.

In fact, she probably wanted to get her hands on the tape earlier than that, but Nico was already occupying the gym. She must've heard the sounds of Nico setting up something inside the gym (since the walls aren't soundproof) and must've waited inside the dressing room for some time... until the gym was clear. But of course, instead of that, Teruko runs into Eden.

So with that, I believe that I explained every mysteries regarding the attempted murder. Eden was indeed on the second floor on the night of day 2 for a suspiciously specific reason that I've already explained.

So... while I'm trying to figure out the most logical purpose of this ball of clothes, I'd like to give more points that further supports the idea that Eden is indeed the culprit.

Take that, Eden!

Let's start with one of my favorite observations in episode 14.

Ah... that scene was very touching, wasn't it? For a moment there, I almost believed Eden... up until someone in the youtube comments pointed out something really interesting about this scene. Doesn't this remind you of something? ....no? Let me help you out!

Hmm? What does that have to do with anything?

A lot of things, actually. Like... the pictures I've shown you from episode 3, Eden claims that relationships aren't transactional, that she didn't do something good so that Teruko would return the favor. Eden also claims that she wants her to be her friend, but not because Teruko feels obligated to.

Then, in episode 14, Eden asks Teruko to help her, because friends help each other. She also says that Teruko is her friend.

I know most of you will say that Eden was being desperate and in big need of help, maybe there is a tiny bit of truth to it. However, I just find it rather strange because as far as I'm aware, from the beginning of chapter 2 up until the trial, Teruko never showed any signs of wanting to be friends with Eden. So why would she now claim that Teruko's her friend and then ask for help when initially, Eden didn't do something good simply just so that Teruko would do something good in return?

In a subtle way, they're kinda like opposites to each other, the scene between episode 3 and episode 14, I mean.

To further prove my point, I'd also like to point out that during these two scenes, they both played the exact same background music. Coincidence? I think not!

Another point I'd like to talk about is something I've already brought up in the past, but it's still very important to remember it...

This happened in the morning of day 4, before the BDA was triggered. She said this a little bit after Whit made a silly comment about Arei hanging around the playground.

You could brush it off as simply Eden being not ready to seeing the corpse of Arei in here, since all the other rooms were explored on that floor, but of course, I don't believe that one bit.

Whit's comment made Eden panic considerably because for a few seconds there, she really thought that her murder plan was about to be ruined because she thought that Whit was the first person to find the body of Arei.

If Whit was the first person to find the body, then the BDA wouldn't trigger which would be dangerous for Eden. As I stated before, someone else discovered the body first and it was David Chiem.

Also, that reminds me. Timing wise, it was impossible for Eden to bring the fishes from relax room to the playground. It was also impossible for Eden to hang the body by the swing set, she's most likely too weak for that. Meaning that Eden never brought those fishes nor did she hang her by the playground. That was never in her plan to do that. She hid the body behind the curtains of the relaxation room.

Therefore, the only person who could've transported the fishes as well as hanging Arei's corpse is the first person who found the body. David is responsible for those two actions during the evening of day 3. He did it for his own selfish reasons, of course!

But wait... if David hung the body during the evening of day 3, how do you explain the body swinging during the morning of day 4?

Ah, that! It's something I've already brought up in part 6, but I'll explain it a little.

There was a reason why she put so much efforts into disguising the time of death by putting on a disguise and building a solid fake alibi from 7pm to 10pm. Eden's main goal was to have the BDA triggered during the evening of day 3, not the morning of day 4. She was hoping that someone would run into Arei's corpse that evening, which that person would go gather help to trigger the BDA.

If that actually went according to plan, Eden's alibi would've been perfect. !!! Come to think of it... the letter would make a lot more sense with this idea in mind.

Since she had nothing to do with the fishes, the initial plan was to bait the people into thinking that eitheir Arturo or someone who may have overheard the conversation would be the one who tried to lure Arei to the playground.

Except that compared to what we've seen in part 1 of chapter 2, the letter was actually supposed to properly display 7:30 PM rather than just 7:30. It was part of her grand scheme to further solidify her alibi.

(There's a missing corner, as you can see, which is very convenient to where PM could be written)

Wait, hold on... if that was the case, then Arei wouldn't be having a meeting in the playground in the morning, but rather the evening! That doesn't work! You said it yourself that she was murdered in the morning of day 3!

Hah! That's not a problem! Eden didn't need to lure Arei with a letter. She simply needed to call her out vocally. Hell, she didn't even have to be calling her out in the morning of day 3 eitheir.

She could've knocked to Arei's door right after the exchange between Ace, Levi, Teruko and herself after the attempted murder. It could be something as simple as : "Um... Arei? There's something really important I need to tell you, but I don't wanna say it here because the others might hear it since the dorms are so close to each other. Besides, it's getting really late. Can we meet up in the playground early in the morning?"

But of course, since the BDA didn't trigger in the evening of day 3, there were a few change of plans. She needed to go back to the second floor in the morning of day 4 to find out what's going on.

While she's heading there that morning, she figured that she should bring back Arei's monopad. Arei's monopad was essential in pulling off the disguise trick as she needed to gain access to her dorm to wear her spare uniform. Initially, Eden arrived to the second floor possibly a little bit before 8:00 AM, thinking that the corpse would still be hidden inside the relaxation room.

But it turns out that Arei's body was actually hanging by the swingset, in the playground. And there's fishes for some reason? (Just saying this based on the culprit's perspective)

Eden figured that it would be way too risky to mess with the crime scene even more than what she was originally going to do.

And what was she doing here in the morning of day 4?

It's simple! Eden put the Arei's monopad back inside the victim's pockets and she retrieved the letter and tore the bottom right corner of it, removing the PM on that letter. She then tore the rest of the letter and threw it in the trash bin. It's also possible that the reason why she tore the rest of the letter is to disguise the fact that the killer purposefully removed a corner of the letter.

Wouldn't it be more beneficial for Eden to not tear up the pm part since she had an airtight alibi at the time?

Not really, no. Since everyone else would be discovering the corpse at around 8 am in the morning rather than last evening as intended, there's no telling how the group would actually attempt to solve the trial.

It's possible that if the PM part was still there, they might believe that the time might be fake, especially since the body would be found next morning. In fact, if they presume that the murder happened in the morning of day 4, they would suspect anyone who had an alibi last evening because of that part of the letter. That's also practically what happened earlier in episode 12.

Levi : Is it possible that the killer tried to confuse us all on the time of the murder to create a false alibi? In that case, we should be suspicious of the people who do have an alibi in the evening but not in the morning?

Teruko : That's another assumption that would lead us astray. Forget that thought.

Levi : Why?

Teruko : We're only guessing that the killer created a false alibi to their benefit. But it's still entirely possible that it was just coincidence that we mistook the murder as taking place at a different time. The killer might not have cared as much as we do. [...]

Charles : Are you not simply dismissing the idea that the killer intentionally falsified the time of the murder?

Teruko : I'm not dismissing it. But it's far more dangerous to dramatically narrow down our suspect pool based on speculative evidence, especially when we barely understand the murder at this moment in time. In other words, we can't consider Levi's idea as evidence unless we have proof.

And there you have it. If the PM part remained on that letter and they realised that the murder could've happened in the morning of day 4, then that whole letter would've been proof enough that the killer purposefully faked the time of the murder, even if the murder didn't happen in the morning of day 4.

Anyways, if touching Arei's pockets wasn't enough to keep the body swinging, it's also possible that Eden accidently ran into the hanging body on her way in or out because she was still in a little bit of a hurry as she didn't want anyone to catch her in the act.

Hmmm... interesting... how very interesting...

What now?

Well, the idea (that I recently came up with) that the letter always displayed "PM" and that she tore up that part of the letter because her plan didn't fully work as intended... it just gave me another amazing idea.

People have been wondering for quite some time what could be the decisive evidence to pinpoint that someone is truly the blackened... I think I finally figured out what the evidence is.

Well, out with it already! Show us what will prove once and for all that Eden is the culprit!

Gladly! I used to think for a long time that the roll of grippy tape would be the ever so decisive evidence for it, since it was practically a smoking gun type of evidence. But alas... you saw what happened in episode 14, so...

HERE'S THE DECISIVE EVIDENCE : THE TORN UP CORNER OF THE LETTER CONTAINING "PM"

Think about it. We know for a fact that Arei's body was swinging in the morning of day 4 and according to my theory, only Eden could be the logical explanation behind this event happening.

Therefore, Eden most likely visited the second floor in the morning of day 4. Since her original plan was to have the BDA trigger in the evening of day 3 but it failed, she needed to remove the part of the letter that mentioned "PM".

Now, here's the fun part : what could Eden possibly have done with it afterwards? She couldn't really dispose it in the trash bin, that's where the rest of the letter was. Eden still needed that letter to build up her narrative to make her seem the least suspicious.

She couldn't hide it anywhere else on the second floor. She didn't want to risk having someone stumbling upon a piece of paper that just happens to perfectly match the rest of the letter.

She couldn't really dispose of it anywhere on the first floor eitheir. While it might've been a logical way to get rid of that evidence, it would've been incredibly risky. By the time Eden did her finishing touches on the second floor, it should've been 8:00 AM by then, if not really close to it.

Every participant was supposed to meet up in the movie screening room for the secrets reveal, Eden couldn't risk doing something slightly suspicious when she should be heading straight for the movie screening room. She couldn't have gotten rid of it during and after the investigation eitheir, there were witnesses close by.

So by process of elimination, there is only one remaining place that Eden could've make the corner of the letter disappear. She hid the torn up corner of the letter in one of her little bags on her belt!!! It's still there as we speak!

How's that for a decisive evidence, eh? :D Take that, Eden Tobisa!

Yeah, yeah, whatever! That's cool and all, but at the end of the day, all of it doesn't really matter if you can't manage to explain what was the point of the starchy ball of clothes! If you can't explain it, then your theory just crumbles!

...heh! :D

Y-you can't be serious... there's no way you managed to-

It took me roughly a day of thinking about it, but you BETCHA that I managed to solve the issue with the ball of clothes! I have a very good idea on what Eden might've done with this piece of evidence during the murder of Arei.

The sticky situation of the ball of clothes

As I mentioned before, I used to think that the clothes were used as a way to protect Arei from the water misting if Eden were to lock her up inside the relax room. But of course, that no longer works because of the actual truth behind the murder attempt.

Yet, Eden clearly placed those clothes for a night inside the relaxation room, so surely it must've been really important to do that, right?

The answer to that is YES. It was a very necessary step in the murder scheme. In fact, I'm willing to bet that without it, her plan wouldn't have worked.

It's just some starchy clothes. Why would it be that important?

Well, as we already know, there's no way Eden could pull off the murder mechanism as shown in episode 13 (aka the drop hanging murder idea) as it would require a good amount of strength that she doesn't seem to have.

So, for her be able to murder Arei, she would instead need to use a murder mechanism that doesn't require a lot of strength. And not too long ago, I finally realised that using the starchy clothes would be incredibly helpful in pulling off that kind of murder without much troubles. Let me elaborate.

Do you guys remember my murder mechanism in part 5? If not, that's alright, let me give you all a reminder.

(Yeah, I recently added those pink lines as compared to my previous picture, just bear with me.)

Here's the order of how that murder went according to my theory

(The pink line is the longer rope and the green line is the shorter rope)

While waiting for the body to be available, she threw the longer rope above the rafters by using the roll of tape as anchor.

She then uses one end of the long rope by tying it to the filled water jugs, by the handles.

She tapes up the bars of the carousel and then keeps some remaining tape for later.

She then ties up the other end of the long rope to the carousel

She drags the victim's body out of the relax room and brings it close to the seesaw.

She places the victim's arms through the gap between the pillars of the seesaw and the tapes her wrists together.

She ties one end of the shorter rope to the victim's neck while placing the other end of that rope very close to the carousel.

She then spins the carousel on one side, let's say counterclock wise. By spinning it, the long rope would get pulled which would pull the water jugs upwards.

She keeps spinning up until the water jugs are high enough. Once it's high enough, she keeps the carousel from moving.

She ties the end of the shorter rope (the one that was close to her already) to the bars of the carousel.

She then spins the carousel clockwise, making the water jugs fall at a rapid while the shorter rope is quickly getting pulled.

The shorter rope keeps getting quickly pull up until it can no longer pull... up until it reaches the victim's neck, which would serve as a brute stopper.

SNAP! Her neck breaks and the handles of the water jugs also break from the sudden stop.

By using this method, it explains the purpose of the taped wrists as well as the scuffed marks on the ground, which happened to be in proximity of the victim's legs. Because of the sudden pull of the neck, the rest of the body would follow, the legs would be what would move the most since it's not restrained, thus creating those marks.

By keeping her arms locked up by the seesaw, it ensures that her whole body wouldn't follow along of the rope pull, which would instead result in a rather funny ragdoll moment, which would probably not kill the victim if her arms weren't restrained.

It sounded really good on paper. Like I seriously thought that I finally figured it out, I thought that it made so much sense. Unfortunately... there are some issues with it.

Ha ha! Your method is flawed! I'm looking forward to these issues!

...very well. For starters, this might cause bruises on Arei's body with this murder method, especially around the arms and shoulders. The only thing that was really restrained were her wrists, so anything else would be violently moving.

But the reason why it could bruise the arms and shoulders especially is because her head and the rope are in the way of her arms. Her head could potentially hit her shoulders and arms... or it could be the other way around too. This becomes a discrepancy since we know for a fact that apart from her broken neck, there is nothing else noticeable about her body.

Next up, the distance between the scuffed marks and the seesaw is fairly long... most likely longer than Arei's height as well. I was aware of this issue in the past, but I simply brushed it off as "it works because it's a work of fiction."

But the more I look into it, the more I feel like it would be incredibly difficult, if not impossible, to prove that the marks were caused by the movements of the legs. We also have to keep in mind that rest of the body would surely move, so why would nothing above her legs leave no scuffed marks? That doesn't quite make sense. If the marks were way closer to the seesaw, it'd be a whole different story, but alas... that's not what happened.

And finally, it is very doubtful that the legs' movements from the killing blow would be causing all these marks we've seen back in episode 8.

As we can see from this picture, there's a lot of traces on the left side, a faint trace in the middle and a few traces on the right side. I don't think there's a valid reason I can come up that would explain why one leg would be leaving more marks than the other. On top of that, it wouldn't explain why there's a faint mark in the middle and gaps between the others.

Unless I were to presume that her legs did a few skips somehow, but I honestly think that's a stretch at this point. But that's not all, from the way the victim's body would be positioned according to my theory, it would actually be physically impossible for her legs to leave marks in such manner.

As you can see in the picture, the dragging of those marks are going up and down rather than left and right. If we follow the logic of how the victim's body would be positioned according to me, then the legs should be making those marks sideways, not what we're currently seeing.

Dang, those are pretty big flaws. Are you sure that your murder method is correct?

I used to think it was back then, but not anymore. At least very least, the idea of the pulley mechanism sounds right while the body setup and positioning is entirely wrong.

But honestly, my idea mainly didn't work because I forgot to factor in a really important element to this equation : the friction! That's right! To make sure my murder method works, I need to find some way to add friction so that the body wouldn't move as much. And how do you make that happen? With the help of starched clothes, of course!

Huh?! What do you mean by that?

This line is very important because we also know for a fact that the turf in the playground uses the same exact materials as the one in the relaxation room. Meaning that a wet turf in the playground would get sticky too.

I can't believe I let this go unnoticed after such a long time, but the stickiness of both the wet turf and the starched clothes played a major role in all of this.

Here's what I believe the culprit did with the starched clothes : Eden placed the starched clothes under Arei's body and above the turf. Basically, the starched clothes in that scenario would serve as a double sided velcro of sorts.

Would the victim's body really stick to the clothes?

Hard to say, but based on my deductions, it has to, right? We don't quite know how sticky it is, but it must've been sticky enough so that it would add friction, at the very least. I don't think it'd make her completly restrained, but rather her movements would be drastically reduced, I'd imagine.

But hold on! Wouldn't only one side of the clothes have starch on it?

Most likely, yes, but the clothes would probably be wet still. So the double sided velcro idea could still work.

I don't think so! MonoTV clearly stated that at 8:00 AM, the turf in the relax room is completly dry so it's safe to walk on it. If the turf dries up by then, so does the clothes!

Hmm... maybe, maybe not. It's true that the ground would be dry, but it's hard to say that the same would happen with the clothes. But if it is truly how it was intended, then that's no problem! Eden just needed to dip one side of the clothes into the pond and they would be wet again.

Okay, but was there enough clothes to cover the whole body?

Hard to say, probably not, if I'm being honest. But I don't think the culprit intended to lay out these clothes so that it would cover the whole body. No, I think Eden mainly wanted to place the starched clothes under the victim's head and the victim's legs.

The head and legs are pretty much what would be moving the most from sudden violent pull of the short rope attached to the neck, so putting the velcro there would be most effective. They might still move somewhat, but definitly not as much as without the adhesive. In fact, I believe that having the velcro effect under Arei's head would make it even easier to ensure that the rope pull delivers a killing blow.

You forgot something : THE ARMS!!! What about the arms?! Wouldn't they just be flailing around everywhere?!

Oh, that? Well, the wrists were clearly taped up and then-

Then what, her arms are restrained under the seesaw again? You already said that it doesn't work!

Heh, of course not! That's not what the culprit did at all! Arei's body was not placed next to the seesaw for the murder. I've already established previously that there's major problems with it. It wouldn't make sense. Therefore, she must've been placed somewhere else.

There is only one specific place that would perfectly explain the scuffed marks on ground. The area where there's scuffed marks? That's exactly where the victim's body was positioned! Arei died on this specific spot!

W-whaaaaat?!?! That makes no sense! How does that even explain how her arms were restrained from moving anywhere?

Don't worry, I'm getting there! :)

So... when we take into consideration the position of the scuffed marks, there's really nothing close by that can be used to restrain her arms, right? And placing her arms above her head like I did in my year old theory wouldn't quite work eitheir. We'd still have the same issues as what I pointed out already.

So from there, we can deduce that the victim's arms must've been positioned somewhere differently than my previous idea in my older theory. And I believe I found the perfect position to place those arms of hers.

The culprit placed Arei's arms behind her back and then taped her wrists. That way, since her back would be facing the turf, it should keep her arms mostly steady. They might move, but her back should be moving along as well. Her wrists were bound because there was still a risk that her arms would free up from her back since their movements wouldn't be as restrained.

That's ridiculous! There's no way that can be right!

...heh! :D Are you sure about that? Let me give you a reminder of how I briefly described the scuffed marks on the ground. There's a lot of traces on the left side, a faint trace in the middle and a few traces on the right side. If we combine everything I've deduced so far, we get this!

Be mindful that even though I just showed you how the victim's body would be positioned, the body part themselves isn't what fully caused those marks, it was mostly caused by the starched clothes' stickiness below the legs and head.

That would certainly help explain those odd shape and patterns on the ground. As for the wrists area, it could eitheir be caused by her hands or the taped up wrists.

But yeah, as shown in this picture, her head would be moving a bit, but not too much since that's where the culprit needed to make sure remained stable. Her wrists wouldn't be moving too much in this scenario since they would be stuck under her back. As for the legs, even though there would be adhesive below, there would still be a fair amount of movement since her legs have more freedom of movement than her head or wrists.

Just to remind everyone, by movement, I'm referring to the drag caused by the rope making a violent pull on Arei's neck.

And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen! This is my final solution to this complex, yet incredibly fun murder case! I don't know if you've noticed, but everything I've said in this post, it would match up perfectly with a heck load of clues and information that we've been provided in this fangan.

So with that said, I only have one more thing to say : The only one who could've commited this crime is you, Eden Tobisa, Ultimate Clockmaker!

--------------------------------------------------------

Thank you everyone for reading this till the end! There's probably a few things I unintentionally left out, so I'll try to add up anything missing if that's the case. But otherwise, I think that was most of it. If there's anything you don't understand or feel like there's something that may not work, feel free to ask me anything!

And don't forget : because it's a work of fiction, as long as there's enough provided information, then it can be possible!

[corkyviolet]

FELLOW TRAVELERS — Your Nuts Roasting On An Open Fire, 1x04

[dropthedemiurge]

. that doesn't have to mean anything . . friendship can start from this.

// Sand/Ray from Only Friends

[more Thai BL fanart]

[cosmicrhetoric]

OKAY! SEE YOU IN WANO!!!!!

[adhd-merlin]

What's the apple tree yard? And its conspiracy? (^.^)

where do I start

[cina-full-moon-xanadium]

they can't hit me with a new sentai announcement right out of me rewatching a doctor who episode i used to think was meh and forgettable but this time actually got a tear out of me

[skrunksthatwunk]

not my dad not liking moral orel season 3 🤭🤭🤭that's so embarrassing for him (<- he's not wrong for feeling that way but i think it's like 60% because he doesn't like it when art gets weird and that's so so tragic for him)

[livvyofthelake]

once upon a time is fun because all these ancient fairytales literally happened 30 years ago. snow white? yeah she was doing all that about 30 years ago. hercules? fought cerberus around 1970. king arthur pulled excalibur from the stone AFTER the release of disney’s the sword in the stone. mulan saved china (china? magic china? unclear actually) about 35 years ago. and it slaps and makes total sense don’t even worry about it

[scholar-of-yemdresh]

Can we PLEASE get trans protagonists In science fiction, fantasy and action movies & TV shows. Pretty please I'm begging. Can we get multiple main/major trans characters too PLEASE?

For the love of God trans rep doesn't need to be regulated to; grounded realistic contemporary dramas/comedies. Or it's a sci-fi/fantasy show but they'll be a side character in the cis MCs story and who'll have a max 10 minutes of screen time

[bluesey-182]

these last two seasons of bones are wack as fuck

[yellowsubiesdance]

so far, season 3 has been my favorite of lok, that was fantastic, and it ended on such a beautiful, emotional note

[lufyuu]

,, Tied Up Prince ''

Psychotic villain x Isekai'd second prince male reader

Tw/s: bondage, stockholm syndrome-ish, reader is into how the villain puts him in his place, dub-con, ripping clothes, degration, angry sex, punished reader, yandere-like oc, agressive sex.

The original post

The sound of blades clashing is loud. Ear deafening even. The sound continues for what feels like a century to the young man. When it finally stops, he lets out a frustrated sigh. Not being able to guess what will happen next.

The masked man refuses to fall down on his knees. Instead, he limps a bit while looking up at the sword wielding main character, his sword casted aside. His long messy hair covers even more of his features due to the fact his mask has sustained some damage and yet he still finds a way to taunt the other. “你真的觉得这样就结束了吗？” , letting out a chuckle. With only a few seconds left in the episode, the viewer watches in anticipation, wondering what will happen. The semi masked man limps towards the other and out of nowhere, throws needles towards the main character. As he passes out, so do the end credits.

"WHAT!??? IT CAN'T END LIKE THIS???", you freak out over the cliffhanger ending, urgently scrolling to see if it's ongoing or if there are more episodes— unfortunately, it's neither. You feel as if you're about to metaphorically cry due to frustration. Nobody warned you there'd be a huge cliffhanger after 50 episodes! "God damnit!", you yell at nobody in particular while trying to do more research. Maybe if you look hard enough, the 51st episode will appear...right?

Even after 2 hours, you refuse to give up. You've wasted almost 3 whole days to watch this stupid series, it can't just end like that. You even go through some tiktok comments and edits too find any clues to an episode 51. Though, it's odd that nobody cares to mention the fact that there's a huge cliffhanger on the last episode. Everyone seems to be okay with it? That can't be right. Either everyone's crazy or you're going crazy.

"AHA!", you finally find a "clue" of some sort in the official website. It states that although the series does end on episode 50, it's based off of a novel which is completed. Without a second thought, you search it up only to find that the novel name is...your name? It clearly says [Name] [L. Name] as the title. As they say, curiosity killed the cat. You mindlessly click on the link.

“我们终将相遇，灵魂伴侣。”

.ᐟ.ᐟ

'My head's killing me...', when you open your eyes, you're faced with a ceiling. It wouldn't be odd if it weren't for the fact that it's not your ceiling. "What the...", you instantly sit up on the bed to look around. Not only is the ceiling not the one you usually wake up to, the entire room isnt even yours. You scramble to get on your feet, almost sprinting towards the door. When you are about to open it, it opens from the other side. "Ah!", the short, well dressed girl lets out a shocked noise, "your highness, you're up early", she regains her composure and sesms to be waiting for something. You stay quiet for a few seconds which prompts her to try and break the silence, "may I come in..?", to which you take a step to the right, allowing her to enter the spacious bedroom and put down a tray with food. Before she exits, she opens the windows for you to which you thank her for as she walks out the room, leaving you all alone once more.

"Gosh it's bright out", you walk over to the now opened window and look out. The scent of nature lingers on your nose, it calms your panicked mind in just a few seconds. The birds chirping, the leaves rustling, the sun shining brightly. Far different from the traffic jam and loud vehicles you'd normally hear. This gives you enough time to think about the situation in a calm and rational manner. 'Your highness?', is what you think of, along with the fact that the room and environment is vastly different from the messy, dark room you would usually wake up to. Questioning yourself only led to even more questions and so, you turn to look at the plate that has been served to you. Two steamed buns and a few fruits for nutrients.

"Alright let's see what I can find!", you have some optimism in you as you begin your "investigation". The courtyard is ridiculously big and so are the halls. You alnost got lost halfway in! Deciding it's time for a little break, you sit down on a nearby pavilion. "I've been here for almost an hour, am I just dreaming..", you pinch yourself a few times but end up with a red cheek and still no answers. "Ow...", you sigh, nothing has given you any answers.

"What's gotten you so stressed?", a voice rings out behind you, prompting you to turn around just enough to get a glance. A good-looking and well built man stands behind with a small smile on his face. He takes a few steps forward and sits next to you, "I don't think I've ever heard you sigh that loudly before", he tries to lighten up the mood seeing how blue you look right now. "Well...", realizing something, you do a double take, "Zhou Jian!?", you jump up in disbelief to which he responds with a very shocked face, "yes..?", he looks worried for your well, "was I really gone that long?", he chuckles and scratches his head, "I could have sworn it was just a month", you could only stand frozen in time, jaw almost wide open but you manage to keep it closed. "C'mon, sit down, tell 哥哥 what's on your mind", he smiles with his eyes closed, patting the seat next to him. You slowly sit down while staring bullets into him. "Are you mad at me?", he asks with a worried expression, you turn away, realizing your stare was bothering him. "Ahem no, of course not", in all honesty, you're trying your best to act like a younger sibling and it sure it hard when your older brother is THE Zhou Jian.

He had previously heard of your dissatisfaction with how he is almost always away from home so it wasn't unreasonable for him to think that way. "Hm, then?", he asks, tilting his head and moving closer to you. You don't even know what you want...maybe just a bit of help 'recalling' who you are. Of course you can't just say you lost your memories or something like that, it'd worry Zhou Jian.

What to do...you have to continue exploring this strange world but also can't risk alerting Zhou Jian...That's it!

"I think I just need a stroll out", you look at him. He tenses up and his eyebrows begin furrow. "You know that's not a good idea", he shakes his head, shit you just fucked up..how were you supoosed to know you're not allowed out?? "Please? There's something I need to do", you try to plead, "and I won't be out an hour", but no matter how you persist, he doesn't waver. "弟弟, if it truly is important, I'll send someone to do whatever it is for you", he offers an alternative but that doesn't work for you. There is no way to convince him so you think of another idea. You close your eyes for a moment and nod, "it's okay, I changed my mind", giving a half smile.

"Oh...they're so tall..", you look at the walls you planned to climb to get out. You never learned how to climb a rope either so that's out of the question. Maybe your secret get out plan won't be happening afterall.

'Think [Name], think!'

You pace around, trying to think of another plan. Those cliche romance shows lied to you! You can't possibly climb a tall building. While pacing around, you can't help but feel as if you're forgetting something but what? You try your best to recall the whole series, the plot, what happened and what started it.

"Zhou Jian has to defend his kingdom against the villain due to the fact that...", you talk to yourself, trying to regain memory of the show, "the villain seeks out the Kingdom's rumoured hidden temple in order to seize...", as if everything's connected, you remember the most important thing, "..the power within!", your fist gently hits your palm, and your eyes widen with excitement. "That means I probably have powers like that too!", you almost let out a happy noise but remembering that you are most likely going to be spotted faster if you do, you contain yourself. "How to activate it..", you try to think of jumping over the wall, maybe gracefully flying over to the other side but nothing happens. "They make it look so effortless in the shows", you start to wonder if there's really not a single system window to guide you.

"Your highness! It's time for your tea", a maid is clearly looking for you, shouting loudly as she searches for you everywhere. "Oh shit!", you'll get found out in no time if you don't escape now! A sudden wave of panic sends your body suddenly flying over the 40ft tall cement wall. "W-wAoHH", You brace for impact but fortunately for you, your body doesn't hit the ground roughly, infact, your fall is cushioned by an invisible object. You need time to process what just happened but the guards right around the corner says otherwise. Without missing another second, your legs sprint towards the town in hopes of not getting caught red handed. 'It seems my magic is unstable..is it because I'm not from here or is it just my new body that's weak..?'

You huff and huff due to how fast you just ran from the imperial palace to the bustling streets. After a while, you pull yourself together and look around, finally noticing the amazing scent of the street food being sold. "Excuse me", a little girl says, trying to get past you as you're blocking the middle, "sorry!", you instantly move to the side to let her get past. "Now, where to start", your eyes dart around, a mom and daughter sharing a tanghulu, a couple enjoying their stroll together and even a homeless looking man being given a baozi to eat. Looking at everything up close in person gives a different feeling than when you're watching behind a screen. Despite being here, you still have little to no clue as to who you are in this world and what your purpose is. All you know if that you're the brother of the protagonist. In the original show, there were no mentions of the protagonist ever having a younger brother so people assumed he's an only child. The only heir to the thrown, who knew there would be a spare?

Well you can't dwell on that too much, you have to at least find out what arc you're in right now. Maybe by knowing, you'd be able to assist the protagonist in fighting! Technically you're the main character now that you've isekai'd into the world so there's no way you'd be in any sort of danger!

You turn your attention to your right, the neverending displays of food makes your mouth water. Unfortunately, due to you not paying much attention to where you're walking, you bump into someone. The impact was enough to send you stumbling backwards. The stranger's hand instinctively wraps around your waist, preventing you from falling onto the people behind you and potentially creating a domino effect. His taller stature surprises you. Only when you stabilize yourself, he removes his hand. "Next time, be more aware of your surroundings", his voice is somewhat elegant yet intimidating and indifferent. You can't really diciphere him as his face is covered by a very oddly terrifying mask. It definitely stands out which makes you wonder if he does like the attention if brings him or simply he's unaware of his unique accessory. Though, before you can ask anything, he walks in past you, dissapearing into the crowd. Something about him seemed...very familiar.

After several hours of strolling and finding absolutely nothing, you notice the sun going down, dusk is coming and the night is about to settle in. So, you decide to get back to the palace the same way you got out of it, panicking and then being thrown over the wall.

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗

Nobody seemed to have questioned why you were gone for half the day. Fortunate for you of course but does beg the question why nobody noticed a prince going missing.

In the morning, however, the same maid who had been calling out to you for tea did question where you were. "I wasn't feeling tea", was your simple yet effective answer.

"Gosh I was out for so long and yet found nothing in return", you kick a rock in the courtyard while sighing loudly. The masked man already erased from your mind. What's even worse is that with your hair this long, it takes more effort to take care of it, not to mention the hanfu which made you stand out like a sore thumb. At just a glance, one could tell you're royalty due to your attire. Maybe you should have thought of that before going out yesterday. This time, you'll dress up just like any other commoner there. There must be at least one that doesn't look like a prince's daily outfit in the closet. You look through the ginormous closet, sorting them out one by one until you finally stumble across an acceptable one.

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗

Back to the bustling streets once more. The smell of food is still as amazing as you remember it. You seem to have forgotten something but fret not, your stomach is here to remind you of it. "I forgot...I didn't have breakfast..", you vaguely remember the picture of a plate filled with food on the table of your room. Well you can't turn back now, you're too far in. "I'll just buy something in the market", you say to yourself, walking towards the nearest food stall which sells roasted meat on sticks. The sight is already mouth watering, you can't wait to sink your teeth into it. "老板! One roasted meat please", you grin ear to ear knowing you'd have one in your hands in a few seconds, "that'll be 3 coins", did you even bring any money? You desperately try to search your hanfu for any signs of coins but to no avail. "C-can I have it...for free?", you awkwardly ask, "hah? Who do you think you are, just so you know, have to feed my family too."

'Time to pull out my status' you thought to yourself, "well, I'm—", "I'll pay for it", a hand behind you gives a few coins to the seller, prompting the seller to give the roasted meat to you. You look behind to see who had stolen your spotlight only to be face to face with yet another mask. The same mask actually. "Thank you but I could handle it by myself", you give a slight smile, "oh? It seems to me you had no money, or perhaps you'd like to pay me back?", you can tell he's a bit annoyed but what you can't tell is that he's amused. "In that case, I take it back", getting a sudden eerie feeling from the man, you leave immediately and he watches you run off.

You run until you're sure he wouldn't be able to see you anymore. "Jeez what even was that..", you wonder to yourself, why did your guts just tell you to run?? That's odd. Really though, something about that man is super familiar but what?

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗

6 months have passed since you've been transmigrated to this world. Fortunately, you adapted quite a long time ago. The strange masked man hasn't been seen at all and because of that, you forgot all about him. The past few months have been relatively peaceful, with some royal guards getting occasional injuries from the amount of fights they've been in. Thankfully, Zhou Jian isn't one of them. You had a hard time accepting that your life in the original world might never return but hey, at least you're treated like royalty. The only downside is that you still aren't allowed outside. A huge bummer.

You enjoy some afternoon tea with Zhou Jian as bonding time for the two of you. "I'm surprised you haven't been sent to the battlefield yet", you jokingly comment, earning you a playful glare from the protagonist, "don't jinx it", he puts his porcelain teacup down, "though, it is strange that the scoundrel hasn't shown up in a while", he's referring to his enemy, the man who has been trying to get rid of your kingdom so they say it. "He's so mysterious too, no matter how many men I send to discover more about him, it's as if he doesn't exist at all but at the same time, he does", Zhou Jian says, looking up and wondering to himself, confused. "One day when you do catch him maybe you'll find out who he truly is", you sip on the hot fragrant tea. The two of you chat for a while before a guard interrupts it.

"Your highness! It's an emergency! The King himself has personally requested you on the battlefield to fight alongside him, it seems the enemies have gotten stronger", the voice is panicked, shaky, stumbling over his own words and trying his hardest to keep his composure but ultimately failing, miserably. Zhou Jian immediately gets up, grabbing the weapon he always carries by his side and rushing out with the guard, "I'm going to be back soon", he glances at you while he says this. Without anyone to chat with, you get up from your seat and head towards the library. Behind you, the servants bow as they take the cups and desserts away.

Even when night falls, neither the king nor Zhou Jian has returned. It's quite common for soldiers to camp out for a few days so you don't worry too much about it.

The hallways are oddly quiet. Probably since there are less guards and servants surrounding the place seeing as a few went to tend to the King and heir. More peace and quiet for you. The stars at night twinkle, the moon glowing so brightly, the sound of crickets. Not even the cold air bothers you. You yawn a bit, "time for bed", your legs carry you to the bed, not as comfortable as the one you had back at home but you can still sleep on it. You tuck yourself into bed and close your eyes, wondering what you'll have for brekafast tomorrow.

At the stroke of midnight, the sounds of blood gushing doesn't even wake you up. No scream can be heard due to the intruder's silencing them. "PROTECT THE SECOND PRI—", the loud voice cuts off, indicating the murder of the man. The imperial palace is a mess, filled with fresh blood and dead bodies. You sleep peacefully, blissfully unaware of the massacre happening just outside your room. Even the door creaking open doesn't wake you up from your deep slumber. A tall man hovers over you, a crown in his hand. He mumbles something but it's so quite that not even a soul can hear it. With a snap of his fingers, your hands and ankles are bound together respectively without you ever even noticing it.

"你真是个可爱的睡美人"

.ᐟ.ᐟ

Your eyes are half open, your vision all blurry due to just waking up. Your whole body aches but when you go to stretch, you find it to not be possible. You struggle and notice your hands and ankles bound by something that's glowing red. It hurts whenever you try to get rid of it. "Go on, the sight of you struggling amuses me", a voice says out loud from a corner of the room. The masked man gets up from his seat and as he walks closer to where you are bound, you notice that his mask is slightly damaged. Well, a part of it has broken off, revealing his blood colored eye.

He carries himself with such elegance that you'd think he's royalty at a first glance. He brings himself down to your level, his eye crinkle softly at the corner, the look on your face is just so adorable. "I never would have thought we'd meet again, 小王子", he grabs your chin, lifting it up so you two make eye contact. "I had an inkling you were apart of their little kingdom, I just didn't expect you to be so naive", he continues while looking at your frustrated face which he adores, "did you really think those pesky little servants could ever protect you?", you turn your head to the side, not wanting to even touch him. It is honestly a bit embarrassing for you as you've watched this whole series, know the plot and yet here you are, kidnapped by the villain himself of whom you finally remember the name of, Xu RenFeng, and not even getting the chance to put up a fight.

Xu RenFeng thinks for a moment, the silence deafening. "How about this, you and I become partners so to say", you're confused by what he's suggesting but he elaborates, "since you're hidden and have no purpose in that palace, you could be with me could you not?", he looks at you expectantly with a psychotic look in his eye. "I would kill you now but you're way too adorable to be killed just like that, I'm offering a role of a lifetime", while it does tempt you in a way, you're still not too sure about dying with him at the end. "No thank you", you don't even look at him as you say this, "I'll give you some more time to think", he stands tall and turns around, walking out the door to your prison.

To say it's a prison is exaggerating. At least it looks like an average bedroom. Not as luxurious as the one you had before but still comfortable. After a few seconds pass, you find your hands and ankles no longer bounded, giving you some freedom to explore the room you've been captured in.

Of course the surviving servants and royal guards had to inform their king and future king what had happened. From the massacre of many, many servants to the second prince going missing, presumably taken by their enemy. "We should've known it was a trap the moment he left", the King is referring to the man himself, Xu RenFeng. "Why would he want [Name]?", Zhou Jian questions, frustrated by how the situation has gone from manageable to a complete mess. His hands balled into fists, worrying for his brother's safety. They have to find you, and fast.

Meanwhile, you've been held in the room for about 5 hours. All you've been up to is trying to think of a plan to maybe just maybe, trick him long enough for the psychotic guy to let you go. From what you've seen in the show itself, he is a very calm and calculating individual, making it hard for anyone to get past him. "Gosh, it seems that the only way to get out is by relying on brute force!", compated to modern times, the door isn't made out of very strong material, maybe you can knock it down or something. When you body slam the door, it doesn't move an inch. "Well that goes my plan", you just sit against the door you had just tried to body slam in defeat.

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗

As days passed, you try a different method of breaking out each day but they all fail in getting you out the the prison-like room. The only time the door would open was when Xu RenFeng himself would bring you food and place it on the table in the room. Even then, when the door opened, you would be bound once more. At least the food was always good. Each time he brought food to you, he'd try to persuade you into joining him. Something about you really did pull him in. You had power over him whether you knew or not.

One day, when there's a knock on the door, you get an idea. Xu RenFeng enters the room in silence, holding a plate in one hand. He puts the food down and as he's about to open his mouth, "can you eat with me?", you ask, surprising him. Today he's wearing a different style of mask. It doesn't cover his lower face, only the eyes. You wonder why he covers his face and remain mysterious. Even towards the end of his life, he never once took off his mask. The reason was never revealed. Though, it did add to his charm which is why a lot of people fell for the guy. He hesitates but gives a slight nod, closing the door with a wave of his hand.

He takes the seat across from you, not having anything on his side of the table. "Oh, I thought you'd grab your own food?", you ask while munching down on the prepared food. "No, I'd rather enjoy the view while I can", his lips turn into a smirk. Unsettling but not the weirdest thing he's said while with you. You get a bit nervous, wanting to pull off the plan but what if he notices beforehand? 'Agh, no more overthinking it, it's now or never [Name]!', you think to yourself and reach over the table, violently tearing the mask off his face, taking him by complete surprise. With great strength and agility, he grabs ahold of your wrist which has his mask. You stare at his face. He wasn't an average looking man. No scars or bruises. Instead, he's the most gorgeous man you've ever laid your eyes on. You're left speechless and so is he for a few seconds.

The look of shock in his eyes is replaced with that of anger. Without uttering a single word and with your wrist still held in his hand, he walks over to your side of the table, glaring at you before pulling you to the bed and throwing you on it. Fortunately you aren't hurt, only frightened. You're pinned to the bedframe by the intimidating villain. Your back is against the frame and you have nowhere to run. "I've been painstakingly patient with you and yet here you are taking off my mask. Was it not obvious to you I didn't want it off, EVER?", to say he's angry is an understatement, his eyes are even more psychotic. All you can do is freeze up due to fear, knowing neither fight nor flight are options in this very moment. You can't muster up an apology, both due to fear and also the feeling of superiority, to you, this man is just a character, he'll be no longer once you find a way back to your home! Without an answer, he takes it as you not wanting to apologize. "Do you really think just because you're a prince that I can't hurt you?", he chuckles at your pathetic expression. With another snap of his fingers, you're bound once more.

As much as you'd like to deny it, the way he's aggressively holding you is really turning you on. Xu RenFeng grabs at your clothes and rips them, leaving your body vulnerable to the man. "What a sight", he looks at you up and down. You try to cover your face with your hands because of embarrassment but he pushes your hands away. "Oh my prince, don't hide your adorable expressions", he purrs.

When you blink, his hanfu has already been diacarded on the floor not far from the bed. "Won't you help a stressed man out?", with his clothes being gone, you can see his hard cock. You stare at it for a little too long, long enough for Xu RenFeng to notice. "Hm? Lost for words are we?", he seems proud of that. "I..It's..—", you bite your lip to contain the moan you were about to let out as the man lifts your legs up to his shoulder and stretches you out with two fingers. "There's a much easier way for this but I'd rather do the old fashioned way to see how you writhe in pleasure just from my fingers. You close your eyes shut, clenched fists as his fingers move around inside, "I'll stretch you so well that this big cock slips right in", just that alone makes you tighten up, earning a satisfied hum from the other. Before long, he decides it's time to add another finger, stretching you out even more. "Ah..ngh...", your moans aren't really heard, the noises you let out are more comparable to humming. Xu RenFeng doesn't like that one bit.

His take his wet fingers out of your tight hole, leaving you feeling empty and opening your eyes as to why he did that. Relying on his strength, he pulls you onto his lap, your hole hovering over his cock, almost touching the tip. "Hu–aggh", you barely have time to react before he plunges you down all the way. You let out the loudest moan that Xu RenFeng's servants are able to hear from outside the magic-sealed room. "What an amazing voice you have, 小王子", he looks up at the person who is unable to speak due to the pain and pleasure he has brought them. His cock remains inside your hole without moving an inch, "a-are you trying to tease me...move", you try to stimulate yourself by bouncing on his cock to the best of your abilities but you can't seem to do that due to him having a tight grip on your waist. "You're so fragile, I'll have an easier time breaking you", he lifts you up until the only thing left inside is his tip and immediately slams you back down on his large cock, repeating this over and over again. "Fuck..", he groans while you're almost screaming-moaning. You never imagined this would be how your first time would go. Xu RenFeng pounds your ass so rough and fast that your ass is turning red.

You feel his precum inside you as he hits your prostate over and over, showing no mercy. "Your hole was made for my cock, wasn't it?", you can't even come uo with a response in that cock filled head of yous, "I'll make sure you remember the shape of my cock by fucking you everyday", he lets out a deep laugh, watching you bounce up and down his cock. Just when you think you can't take anymore, he goes deeper until you can't think of anything anymore. You cum while moaning loudly, still being bounced up and down. The stimulation is driving you crazy, everything feels like a fever dream. Not long after you came and without warning, he cums inside while still pounding you, not stopping for a second. He's cumming as he's thrusting inside, giving a new sensation you never thought you'd feel. "I see you're enjoying this more than I am, how adorable that expression of yours", he points out, "aren't I glad I picked you up along the way", if he could, he would have given himself a pat on the back that moment. You try to push him off, wanting to go at your own pace or to possibly just take a breather, "ah-ah, we're not done", he keeps thrusting deep inside, "don't worry, I'll return you in one piece to your family soon~"

He didn't stop until he had pumped at least a few cups worth of cum inside of you. You passed out due to how rough he was being. Xu RenFeng made sure to tuck you into bed. When he came out the room with his mask back on, he appeared to be very refreshed, some servants even whispered to the others that he was practically glowing. All because of a certain young prince named [Name].

You may not know it yet but you're now stuck with a psycho of a man.

Translation notes!

你真的觉得这样就结束了吗？

Do you really thinks this is over?

老版

Boss (in this context, used to address shopkeepers/vendors you want to buy from)

我们终将相遇，灵魂伴侣。

We will meet eventually, soulmate.

弟弟

Little brother/younger brother

哥哥

Big brother/elder brother

你真是个可爱的睡美人

You really are a cute sleeping beauty

小王子

Little prince (endearing)

I have so many ideas for this man but couldn't fit all of them in one fic🥹

There's this one kink I know you'll love but unfortunately didn't make the cut, maybe next time/drabble!

[certaimromance]

𝜗𝜚 Cupid Walks Right.

Spencer Reid x BAU!reader

Summary: You've been hiding your attraction to your coworker for a long time, until a few pictures of him kissing a celebrity in a pool unleash emotions you can't control.

Words: 1,6k.

TW: mentions of crime and arms (normal warning in the series). spoilers for s1 e18 ("somebody's watching"). two idiots in love. lots of jealousy. english isn't my first language (sorry for my mistakes, be kind please).

Note: The reader is simply me every time I watch that episode but with a lot more drama to make it interesting.

♡ Enjoy! ♡

One bullet after another hit the paper meters away from you, with each shot more accurate than the previous one. You had lost count of how many cartridges you had already spent because your mind was full of thoughts that only the sound of the shots echoing in the shooting room managed to silence and give you back a little control of the situation.

Memories of one of the last cases still lingered in your mind, and you couldn't understand why. It hadn't even been something relevant enough to stick in your mind that much, it was just a crazy stalker obsessed with a celebrity and more of the same old same old in terms of creating a profile. It was nothing you hadn't seen before, and it had ended well, with a happy ending that included Spencer kissing the victim he was supposed to be protecting.

That was the crux of the issue, the root of your problem.

You saw some photos that captured the moment in vivid detail and wanted to run out and throw up in the nearest trash can. You held back to avoid answering embarrassing questions, blaming your bad feelings on the last thing you ate and insisting that you were just satisfying your curiosity. But as they say, curiosity always kills the cat.

Maybe it was because it was unprofessional and unnecessary, maybe you were in a bad mood and needed to relax, maybe you were upset that the guy with the germ problem had shared saliva with a stranger, maybe you didn't like Lila Archer because of her performances, or maybe you just wanted to be in her shoes and have him kiss you like that. And for heaven's sake, maybe you've had a few inappropriate dreams about it lately.

You were just about to fire again to get the thoughts out of your mind when someone tapped you on the shoulder. You turned around, ready to defend yourself with the gun in your hand.

“Wait, wait, it's me. I'm sorry.” Spencer raised his arms in a sign of peace and took a few steps back. “Just me.”

“What are you doing here? You scared me.” You lowered the gun and placed it on the table, trying to sound less abrupt. “I thought everyone had gone home.”

He approached you again, checking the open shells and the pile of bullets on the ground. He was quite surprised to see how many times you had hit the target with perfect shots, and how you still seemed intent on continuing, even though it was almost two in the morning. It wasn't practice, because you didn't need it, it was something else, and you seemed quite angry about it.

“I spent the hour going through some papers and saw the light on in here. I thought I'd come and have a look.” He explained, trying to follow your gaze, which seemed to elude his. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah, perfect.”

You started gathering your things and cleaning up the space you'd been using, planning to leave as soon as possible because of his presence. It had been weeks since you'd been alone with him because you'd managed to avoid seeing him as best you could. You'd even managed to convince Hotch that it was time for him to pair you up with someone else during the cases to experiment. You didn't even know why he'd listened to you, but it had been a great relief.

“You're leaving already?” Spencer asked, and you just nodded. “Can I take you home?”

Usually he drove you home, because your car was still at the mechanic and you refused to buy a new one. You always used the minutes you spent together to talk about something other than cases, they were moments of relaxation that you both appreciated. The big difference was that now you couldn't afford that luxury without feeling strange.

“Don't worry, I'll call a taxi.” You grabbed your jacket from a nearby locker. “I'm fine.” You added, with the intention of heading for the door until he stopped you by the wrist.

“Is everything okay...between us?” He asked as you looked up to meet his eyes. “Are you mad at me?”

“I'm sorry, what?” You said, feigning confusion. You always knew it was only a matter of time before he figured something was off with you. After all, he worked in profiling.

“Are you mad at me?” He asked again, in a lower voice, sounding a little more vulnerable than he'd intended. That instantly made you feel bad, you didn't want to hurt him with your confusion.

“No.”

He let out a sigh at your automatic response. His shoulders slumped a bit, and he felt a wave of relief for a few seconds. But then he looked into your eyes for a moment and hesitated, biting his lower lip.

“So...why are you looking at me like that?” He asked, sounding a little shy and with a hint of apprehension in his voice. “Or not looking at me at all.”

“I'm not doing anything.” You make excuses.

He got the chills when he heard your voice, which came across as cold and distant.

“You're giving me that look.”

You gave a little frown and folded your arms, as if to say you didn't agree.

“What look?"

“You look at me like I've done something wrong, like you're disappointed or angry...I think both. You barely look me in the eye, you walk away every time I want to talk to you, you don't sit near me on the jet or want to work with me anymore. And you've been like this for a week.” He paused for a second, remembering when your strange behavior started. “Ever since the L.A. case.”

The room was suddenly filled with silence and a palpable tension. You had been foolish to think Spencer wouldn't notice your remoteness, given his perceptive nature. But you didn't have a choice. You didn't want to appear jealous when you didn't even have feelings for him, you were just ovulating or something like that.

“Is it because...because of Lila? I heard Morgan say some things, and you haven't treated me the same since.” His wavering voice sounded more and more confident, as if he still had to convince himself of his point of view. “I want to know what you think, please.”

You could only curse Derek for exposing you like that. He was the only one who knew about your strange attraction to Reid because he had caught you looking at him several times and you had confessed it to him once in a bar after several drinks and a ridiculous game of cross questions. Since that night, the jokes and suggestions about making out with Spencer under a tree had begun.

But a beautiful actress did it before you, in her pool, with lots of pictures to prove it.

“I'm not one to tell you what to do, but I think your actions were unprofessional and most of all risky.” You spoke after a few seconds, clearing your throat and trying to contain the burning you felt. “It could have ended badly.”

Come on, you would have done the same thing. You often thought about what it would be like to kiss him in the middle of an investigation, especially when he kept giving important details. So you were a little hypocritical.

“I'm only saying that because I care about you.” You added, noticing how confused he looked.

“I know, I care about you too.” He replied calmly, taking a step toward you to touch your arm. “This has been bothering you?”

You froze at his warm touch and the implications you thought he was making about you, nodding as if hypnotized. Had he realized that you had been jealous all along? That you wanted to go back so he could kiss you and not her? That you wanted him to put his hands on your cheeks and kiss you deeply until you were breathless?

“I think I understand, but don't worry about me. I won't do anything dangerous anymore.”

Oh, he hadn't noticed.

Spencer really thought that you were just concerned about his safety because he was your friend and your partner on cases, that you were just frustrated that you weren't there to back him up in case things went wrong. It didn't even occur to him that it was something much deeper and more heated than that.

“So, all good?” He gave you a small smile that made your heart beat a little faster.

“Sure.” You lied, with a strange lump in your throat at the guarded words. “I just didn't know you liked blondes.” You added in a fake teasing tone.

Despite your clearly suspicious tone, Spencer laughed sheepishly. “Actually, I like your hair color.”

A strange bubbling sensation reached your stomach and made you smile.

“Mine?” You asked, lowering your gaze to the floor.

“Yes, it's like it's perfect for you.” He carefully brushed your hair out of your face and tucked it behind your ear, causing the feeling in your stomach to identify itself as butterflies fluttering nonstop.

“You're telling me because I have a gun?” You tried to change the subject with a nervous laugh. “I'm not a celebrity, after all.”

“You don't have to be one to be as pretty as you are. But you could be if you wanted to, and...” He started to talk about statistics and a bunch of data you didn't even know, but strangely enough you didn't listen to him this time because you were stuck on the first sentence.

Spencer really thought you were pretty.

It was only then that you realized something had changed. The only successful shot had been Cupid's arrow to your heart.

Because, damn it, you were totally in love with that man.

[saintobio]

sincerely yours. (10)

↳ gojou satoru/reader

when a twist of fate led their marriage to the path of a quintessential tragic romance, two past lovers go through another series of experiences on love, heartbreak, identity, illness, and trauma along the road to a happily ever after. 

genre. heavy angst, amnesia, modern au, 18+ 

tags/warnings. depression, intoxication, trauma, implied suicide attempt, toxic relationships,

notes. important announcement ! as you all know, this series has always had an extensive approach into detailing the events in its side stories (ie. sera x sukuna x naoya, yuuji x megumi, maki x yuuta x miwa, etc), but while writing the chapters, the word count and the plot building had become too exhausting for me to produce consistently, esp with the amount of scenes and side stories i was introducing to the story, so i've decided it's best for me to stick to the main characters, reader & gojo, and will only add side stories as necessary. this really hurts me knowing that i can't achieve the level of comprehensive writing and world building that i did for sincerely not, but i really want to finish sy as soon as possible and removing a chunk of side stories would be some of the things that'd help me achieve that 😭 i hope you guys understand. hopefully i'll figure out a way to write those side stories instead of completely abandoning them mid-way in this series. but as always, thanks for ur continued support <3

series masterlist -> episode eleven

“It’s a little weird.”

What was supposed to be her bed time had turned into a moment of reflection for Sera who, instead of being fast asleep at this time of the night, had unconsciously brought herself inside Sukuna’s home office to join the up-and-coming tech mogul in his late-night programming. 

She wore her silk pajamas, pacing back and forth in her boyfriend’s office as her mind flew back to the recent encounter she had with her ex-boyfriend. Who knew that Satoru’s kid would look just like a carbon copy of him? No, actually, the question should be: who knew it would be a different woman by his side acting as the mother of his child? Sera had to laugh at herself, shaking her head as she realized how truly and undeniably ridiculous her ex was. It was clear that day that he wasn’t really as loyal of a partner as he claimed himself to be. 

Did he really just go through all those crazy things with you, only to look like a whore-hopping fool now? 

If he was bound to end up with someone else other than you, then why did he have to make Sera’s life miserable in the first place? 

She may have done terrible things before as a selfish and materialistic lover of his, but that wouldn’t change the fact that Satoru also contributed to her role as the side-piece in his marital relationship. He allowed her to cling to him like a mistress. Being his side-piece wasn’t even something that she had forced upon him. It was his promise, an idea that he planted on Sera’s head, saying that she would need to stay by his side and that he would marry her guaranteed that he had already secured the merger and divorced you. He swore like a fool that he would divorce you. But guess what? The jerk ended up falling in love with his wife and suddenly had no use of Sera. Suddenly, he was such a good husband who couldn’t be more loyal. Suddenly, he was a lovestruck man who had always been in love with his childhood friend. If he had downright dumped Sera the moment his engagement was announced, if he had not been prideful and ambitious since the beginning of his marriage, he probably would have had better luck at having that healthy relationship he yearned from you. 

But how come the blame of being the third-party was all on Sera when her only mistake then was loving the person who promised her all the good things in life? 

Now, you see, this was all just bitterness brewing at the back of her head. She knew what she did was still wrong and that she wasn’t innocent. Sera swore to herself that she would never look back on those awful days ever again, but seeing how Satoru was running around freely with a different woman just reminded Sera of his days as a spiteful, two-timing man. Somehow, it felt like he had changed and yet didn’t at all. 

Ha ha ha. How ridiculous was that? 

“What’s funny?” asked Sukuna, her present boyfriend and thankfully so. He was Sera’s blessing, because she never would have thought that a man like him could still exist in a world full of Satoru’s and Naoya’s. “You look cute smiling to yourself, though.”

“I know,” she responded to the compliment, shifting to settle herself on his lap, though his attention remained fixed on his laptop screen. “It's just strange to me,” she continued, her voice thoughtful, “how Gojou appears his usual self, yet there's something off about him.”

The question clouded Sukuna’s eyes in confusion, tilting his head to the side as he tried to comprehend her description. “You mean dude got uglier?”

I wish, Sera thought. “No, he’s… he’s different. The vibes are different. For a second, he even looked like he was dissociating the whole time he was with that girl,” she said, referring to Satoru’s new girl as though she was your cheap alternative, “But then again, why is he with her in the first place if he looks absent-minded the whole time, you know what I mean?” 

“Was he like that with you before?” 

“At times, but it’s not like the way he’s acting right now… I don’t know, I can’t explain it. The energy is off. That’s just not how he acts when he’s really, really into someone.”

To be honest, Sukuna didn’t give a damn about Satoru Gojou’s life and any normal boyfriend wouldn’t really like hearing their girlfriend talking about another man, especially her ex at that, but he knew Sera found joy in old money gossip and he was aware of the demoralizing past she has had by associating herself with them. Sukuna was acting all engaged in their conversation because he wanted to make her feel heard and that he shared her simple joys in life. Besides, it was through her that he learned so many inside scoops about the people that ran the country’s biggest conglomerates. It was like watching one heck of a messy episode of Dynasty. 

“Didn’t he get into a car accident?” he recalled, remembering the headlines on the news that day, “Then, we saw him at the expo and he couldn’t really remember you. The guy’s probably got his head all messed up.” 

Sera was bitter at the time thinking that Satoru was toying with her when he asked who she was, when the truth was, he was actually diagnosed with amnesia. It was such a shock to her, truthfully, because having amnesia felt like something you would only see on a movie’s screen. Well, in that case, she could also say karma’s a bitch. The director might be onto something here.

“He’s probably not mentally fine, but still…” she thought carefully and played the scene in her head again. What was it about the Gojou that she saw the other day that was different? “He just has a different vibe to him that it feels uncomfortable. It’s like he’s rude, but not so rude? He doesn’t have much of a personality anymore. Like a complete stranger.”

“Maybe it’s the new girl rubbing off on him.” Sukuna was back to typing on his laptop as he said that. Frankly, he was just saying anything at this point. 

Sera shook her head in response. “Well, I don’t know about that girl he’s seeing and I don’t really care, but it’s common knowledge to the filthy rich that she’s Y/N’s best friend. That’s why I recognized her right away, and that’s why it disgusted me,” she pressed on, “Tell me, would you—and be honest about this—would you fuck your best friend’s ex?” 

The humor on her boyfriend’s face came right as she asked that. “Babe, you fucked a married man. It’s worse than fucking somebody’s ex.” 

“Shut up.” Rolling her eyes, she got up from his lap and sighed, but Sukuna wasted no time in pulling her back onto his lap. His chuckle was mingling with the gentle kiss he had planted on her cheek, unaware that his actions made Sera’s heart flutter. “Forget it. I shouldn’t even be talking about Satoru with you.”

The man stretched his arms and finally closed his laptop, patting Sera’s thigh afterwards. “On that note, I do have another ‘dude from your past’ that I gotta meet tomorrow.” 

Her reaction alone was a response for him. “Naoya?” she protested, face contorting with disgust. “What for? I told you not to take on that project.”

“Yeah, I considered it, and you know, the partnership could really benefit CleaveTech,” Sukuna reasoned, leaning back as he outlined the situation to her from a business standpoint. Given her own background working for the Gojou Group before, he expected her to grasp the significance of this partnership and set aside any personal grievances or emotional attachments. “The Zen'in Group is a major client. It’s all pros and no cons here.”

“The contra is the guy you’re gonna work with,” she highlighted with a hint of annoyance rising from her throat, “Naoya is nothing but an opportunistic motherfucker. Mind you, he’s a stupid elitist, too.” 

He held back a laugh, not even threatened by a man who had a terrible history with his girlfriend. “Nah, I’ll deal with him. Just trust me on this.” 

As much as Sera wanted to object, she knew Sukuna had a point and that she really shouldn’t hinder his company from being partnered with such a large conglomerate. She just didn’t like the thought of her boyfriend being around a man who manipulated and humiliated her to the point where she had been blacklisted by multiple companies, leaving her to resort to being somewhat of a prostitute just to make ends meet. 

The world was harsh for the not-so-rich, and all Sera wanted was to give those upper class people a taste of their own medicine. But seeing as her desire for revenge would clash with her boyfriend’s chance at company growth, she had to set aside her personal grudge and support him on this one.  

Still, there was nothing wrong with being curious. “Is there any other reason you agreed to this partnership?”

Sukuna smirked as if he expected that question from her. “Blame it on my little brother, he’s been bugging me ‘bout it.”

“Yuuji?” Sera asked, clearly confused. 

To which her boyfriend quickly answered, “Yeah. He said it’ll give him an opportunity to work with his best friend. You know that kid, Fushiguro, right?” 

Ahh. Toji’s kid aka the heir to the Zen’in business empire. Sera had met Megumi before, and while that other brat Mai used to be unreasonably rude to her, the younger boy was always civil and respectful at least. He never even once treated Sera like dirt when she was spending time with Naoya at their mansion. Perhaps their upbringing really differed because he was raised by Toji and the other Zen’ins were raised by demons. 

Nevertheless, with a connection now established between Sukuna and Naoya through Yuuji and Megumi, Sera couldn’t help but feel that her peaceful days as a nouveau riche were about to become far more intriguing. Depending on the cards she would choose to play, they could even turn into a living nightmare. 

— —

You weren’t exactly abandoning your company; you were merely taking a break, a necessary pause given your current mental state after the whole break-up with Toji and the Osaka thing. Your mind was just too overwhelmingly occupied to even properly function. Each day, mustering the energy to show up at Hearte's head office became increasingly challenging, especially when faced with individuals who relied on you for major decisions and creative direction. 

To make matters worse, Akemi’s sudden resignation hit hard.

You received her decision by a simple letter, a mere piece of paper, without even having the guts and decency to meet with you in person. Was she scared? Or was this her way of rubbing salt on the wound, shoving it in your face that she was now taking things to the next level with your ex-husband? 

She did cite in her resignation letter that her reason for resigning from the role was due to conflict of interest. You wanted to laugh when you read that part. No, you wanted to choke in your fit of laughter after reading through her asinine reasons. She could have been upfront and mentioned that the so-called ‘conflict’ was the very man her best friend had previously married. 

Obviously, everyone in the office felt sad knowing that a core member of the company left without at least a 30-day notice, but they were all also aware that her resignation was due to personal albeit controversial reasons. Did Akemi not care about her image at all? The same colleagues she had trained, managed, and collaborated with would now likely gossip about her behind her back. She would become a hot topic of disrespect among the people that once heavily respected her. Did she also not care about the company you two created together anymore? This was the same company you two had passionately dreamed of during your late-night conversations on a New York rooftop. She was the one who wanted to build a fashion house together with you.

Yet, it seemed she was willing to throw it all away for a man already entangled in complicated familial dynamics. Her immediate resignation and refusal to speak to you in person just further confirmed it to you that Akemi was willing to forsake your friendship by choosing a man who already had a child with someone else. 

Since she chose that path, you couldn’t help but interpret Akemi’s actions as a deliberate slight against your friendship. It seemed clear that she no longer viewed you as a friend and was essentially cutting ties with you. Otherwise, why would she take such a step? Akemi wasn’t the type to be vindictive; she likely believed she was sparing you further pain by severing your connection. However, regardless of her intentions, her actions felt deeply disrespectful and hurtful.

If this was what she wanted, then kudos to her and her unbelievable confidence to choose a man like Satoru Gojou. Besides, it didn’t even take you a week to find another replacement. Your family connections were powerful after all. You readily had a pool of potential candidates for the role of the Head of Sales, Retail, and Merchandising—all from prestigious backgrounds and unparalleled expertise. While the competition was tough, you selected the person you deemed was the most qualified to be your second-in-command. This was someone you had esteemed since college, a person who excelled in both business acumen and creative vision.

Yuki Tsukumo. She was influential in every sense, and you trusted that she would be able to manage the high pressure environment of a start-up fashion house and transform it into an iconic brand, a household name that would one day rival Chanel and Miu Miu. 

You may have succeeded in replacing Akemi. You may have shown her that her position in the workforce was easily replaceable, but her role as your friend still left a lingering, repugnant mark that proved far more difficult to erase. This underlying sentiment could explain the unreasonable anger festering in your heart—a visceral reaction born from feelings of backstabbing betrayal. 

It was hard enough for you to travel all the way to Osaka with a broken heart, but it became much more agonizing to watch your own son run up to Akemi like she was his mother. It was a goddamn slap to your face, indeed, to see that your ex-husband had already chosen a woman to have his happy, little family with. That he wanted to be a good man and be everything you wished for in a husband for her. 

As they say, nothing hurts more than building a man for another woman. 

And honestly? You cried so much on the way home that you became numb. Now, you were just trying to get over it. You were trying to bury the searing pain in order to forget the betrayal you felt. It was all too much for a person to handle and it wasn’t like you hadn’t gone through the same old shit before. Wasn’t it worse before with Satoru actually cheating and all? He technically wasn’t crossing any lines here, so it shouldn’t hurt you. It shouldn’t. You had been here before. If you had managed to get through such an awful time as his previous wife, his relationship with Akemi shouldn’t be too hard to accept. No, you weren’t trying to lowball your pain, but it was better to be an optimist in this situation than be a suicidal, self-destructive person. You had a business to run and a child to raise. You had to be strong. 

Or at least, that was what you told yourself. That was what you had been telling yourself over and over, each time you got up from bed forcing yourself to have a false positive mindset. In fact, that was also why you had to take this extended break because you had to have your peace of mind. You had to have some form of release to remember why you needed to stay alive and keep yourself going.

Not just for Sachiro’s sake, but also for your own. 

Your safe haven for now was at the horse ranch, where the tranquility of riding and the beauty of nature provided the perfect ambiance for reflection. How long has it been since your last visit to Willow? Your father had been joking that you shouldn’t be leaving a beautiful, white Friesian horse unattended for years, especially not for the expensive price he paid her for. True enough, because the moment you saw the mare again, you almost forgot how majestic she was for her breed. Willow was a completely docile and graceful horse, so alike to you in many ways. However, one thing that was unlike you, was that she lived in peace, existing solely for herself and not for anyone else.

If only you could be like her. 

As you reached out to stroke your rare-breed horse, a new and unfamiliar stallion in the stable caught your eye. To think of it, your family shared this equestrian estate with the Gojou family. This realization meant that the strikingly elegant and tall gray horse in the adjacent stall belonged to none other than Satoru.

“It’s a Thoroughbred,” the equine caretaker informed while guiding your horse out of the stable, “Mr. Satoru got him recently and named him Six.” 

A gray Thoroughbred, renowned as the most expensive horse breeds out there. It could fetch a price as high as $70 million, and of course, Satoru was the perfect owner for such a prestigious horse. The stallion embodied his essence completely—its color, its build, its rarity. On the other hand, you couldn’t help but find his naming convention by number a bit odd. His previous black stallion was named Eight. This time around, it was Six. Couldn’t he be more imaginative?

“He’s beautiful,” you mumbled, nonetheless, in awe with the regality of the horse. 

“He’s a good boy, too,” added the enthusiastic horsekeeper in a thick country accent, “Mr. Satoru was here yesterday and played polo while riding him. They were perfectly in sync even if it was his first time riding him.”

Of course, he would play polo. That was one of his favorite recreational sports. The burning question at hand was, who was with him during his visit? Because if the caretaker mentioned Akemi, you would certainly lose it. This was your private space with him. This estate was a place that none of his other women had access to, not even Sera. This was a location filled with memories from your childhood. For him to bring another woman here would be crossing the damn line. 

“Did he bring anyone with him?” you asked, trying to sound casual as you dusted off your boots. 

The caretaker denied. “No, he was alone. He just came to play polo and check the horses he recently bought.” 

Oh… “He bought more than one?” 

Did he seriously get Akemi her own horse? Your heart was racing at the thought, but the caretaker led you to the stable near the exit to show you the other horse than your ex-husband had purchased. It was a brown Shetland pony. 

“He got a fully trained Shetland for your son,” the horsekeeper proudly declared, showcasing the pony as if he had been instructed to do so in anticipation of your visit. It was obvious that Gojou had already briefed him on introducing Sachiro’s new pony to you because he knew you would be asking about it. “His name is Elmo. He is kid-safe and very friendly.”

Frankly, you wanted to sigh in relief, but at the same time, it warmed your heart to know that Satoru got his son his own horse at such a young age. You could already sense him planning to make Sachiro take equestrian classes when he gets older, and probably join him on his horseback riding sessions, too. You could imagine just how perfect it would be to see the father and son bonding here, racing together, playing polo together… yet it would not be you who would be watching them on the side.  

This future he was setting up with his son would be an experience he would share with Akemi. 

There was no you in that vision anymore. 

The caretaker likely questioned your sanity when he noticed the bitter smile on your face as you mounted your mare. He might have even doubted whether you were sane enough to ride alone, without a guide, particularly through the woods since Willow had not been ridden for some time now. However, you had done it countless times before and were quite familiar with the trail, and so you dismissed his offer to lead you and assured him confidently that you knew your way back.

You needed this solitude. You craved this moment of peace, alone with your thoughts and surrounded by nature, to reflect on the ceaseless torture of your life. It was just never-ending, squeezing every drop of happiness out of your system to make sure that you would only live to suffer. You really thought you had your happy ending with someone else? You actually believed you had found the perfect man to be your actual husband? 

Well, unfortunately for you, Toji was not the one. 

At first, your mind flew to Toji as you went on to the trail, allowing the mare to continue trotting as you held the reins to control her. You remembered Toji’s text that morning, asking you for the hundredth time if he could meet with you. He likely wanted to apologize in person, but you doubted he would change his mind and take back the things he said. Because they were true. He could never fill the void left by his deceased wife by being with another empty soul. It was painfully, unmistakably true. You were better off dead if that was the case, because even if you did end up marrying him, you would never be regarded as the person he loved the most. After all, your role in this world seemed to always be the second option. You were never the first in other people’s books. Not with your ex-husband. Not even with your family, especially with Gen around. You were meant to be a bystander, watching others live their perfect lives while you were forced to be in your misery. Someone like Toji would not have a guaranteed blissful marriage with you and you had to spare him from that. You had to draw the line and step back from this charade that you were playing with him, knowing that you were never the right person to be with him, so at some point, you had to accept his drunken words. They came from a place of truth, and that truth would set the both of you free. 

Even it hurt. Even if it fucking hurt to hear his words. You couldn’t deny them. 

You could easily forgive him, but his words might take a while for you to forget because even thinking about it now was bringing a wave of pain into your chest. You didn’t even notice that you were losing control on Willow’s reins by the time you entered further into the woods, bouncing on the saddle as you galloped along the challenging path. With the speed you were riding right now, inexperienced riders would certainly find it unsafe and scary. But for you? It was just what you needed. The breeze of fresh air, the thrill of riding alone, the peaceful sound of nature—you could die there and be at your happiest. 

Maybe that was where you had to be; to disappear and leave them all behind. Wouldn’t that be best for everyone? If you were to vanish, they could finally be free. Your presence, even from the beginning, was a burden for everyone—for your dad, Gen, Satoru, Toji, and even Akemi. The people you trusted the most would be the same people who would secretly celebrate your demise. So, what else was hindering you from taking matters into your own hands and ending it all yourself?

“Giddy up!” 

Was it Sachiro? Definitely. But now he had his father, and he was likely starting to see Akemi as a mother figure as well. Your role as his beloved mama could be easily replaced if you were to leave him now. It wouldn’t hurt him as much that way. Three years with Sachiro seemed sufficient enough, and he was at an age where he could grow up alongside his father. In this short span, he would have lasting memories with you, yet not enough to deeply grieve your absence. He was a young child, surrounded by people who would offer the whole world to him. At least, for that, you were eternally grateful. It brought you comfort knowing that your son would have support after you were gone, and that he would find a mother figure in Akemi. Given the brief time he spent with you and the rest of his life with her as his stepmother, Sachiro would likely come to love and accept Akemi as his own mother. This was the best outcome you could hope for.

My child, my son, my baby… please don’t get mad at mommy. 

Tears were gushing out of your eyes and you hadn’t even realized it until they started blurring your vision. You were far too lost in your own thoughts, unaware that you were now in an unfamiliar and seemingly dangerous part of the trail. The path was getting a little bit too steep and poor Willow was clearly stressed at your inconsiderate handling. There were multiple obstacles on your rocky terrain and you weren’t as steady and controlled as you wanted to be because the horse wasn’t comfortable navigating such a difficult path with the pace you were forcing her to.  

“Ah!” 

Your attempt to balance was interrupted by Willow’s loud neigh, signaling her distress before she bolted into a full rampage. She was sprinting at an estimated speed of 20 miles per hour. Not even a skilled rider like Satoru himself would be cantering that fast on unfamiliar terrain and an unfit horse. But you, you clearly had a death wish, because instead of fearing for your own life, you were far more concerned at the thought of how dreamy Satoru and Akemi’s wedding would look like after your demise. They would definitely make Sachiro their ringbearer. Suguru would be the best man. Shoko, the maid of honor. People on the internet would praise them for being an attractive couple. They would anticipate their beautiful kids together, living in the same mansion he bought as a gift to you. He would kiss her good night, tell her loves her, and offer the whole world to her. They would exchange vows and promise themselves a lifelong commitment to be by each other’s side through sickness and in health, and only in death would they part. 

“Willow!” 

You let out a shriek as the reins slipped from your grasp, causing you to tumble off the saddle and crash onto the ground. The impact was first felt in your elbow, and a sharp, searing pain then radiated through your body. There you lay, sprawled on the dirt, helplessly watching Willow galloping out of control up the mountain, and then tragically plummeting off a cliff.

“Nooo! Willow, no!”

Utter hysteria overtook you. You sobbed uncontrollably, unable to determine which pain was more agonizing—the clearly broken elbow, the loss of the horse you had inadvertently led to its death, or the heart-wrenching reality of Satoru starting a family with someone else.

You were pathetic. You were such a pathetic excuse of a human being and this was why you deserve hell. 

“Willow!” 

Toji couldn’t love you. Your own son didn’t want to be around you. Satoru had gotten over you. And now, you drove a poor innocent horse to its demise because of your recklessness! 

You were crying hysterically as you held your pained elbow, crawling by the cliff’s edge as you screamed for your horse’s name, but in the end, there was nothing you could do. You could only apologize to poor Willow for having such an irresponsible owner, and now she was dead because of you. 16 years of her life, she was able to live in peace until you came and ruined it all for her. It should have been you. You were the one who should have jumped off a cliff. You should atone for your sins and follow her, but you were too weak, far to overcome by the excruciating pain on your hip and your broken elbow to move or do anything at all. 

That was, until your mind had completely shut down, leaving you as a mere body to be discarded alone in the darkness of the woods. You hoped that no one else would find you soon. 

— —

“A-Angina?” Satoru’s eyes went wide. His whole world stopped before him.

“Yes. She was diagnosed with stable angina,” Dr. Mori confirmed, much to your husband’s horror. “But there is another factor that requires her to have more rest. You need to take good care of your wife, Mr. Gojou. Her body needs a lot of nutrients so she can carry safely.”

He could barely process the whole thing in his head because the news kept coming one after another, leaving him in a befuddled state with a flood of unanswered questions running through his mind. “What do you mean…?”

“Your wife is seven weeks pregnant.”

…

…

“Y/N?”

“Y/N!”

“Are you out of your mind?!” 

You could barely pry your eyes open, but when you finally managed to, you were met with the concerned expression on Gen’s face. The harsh glare of fluorescent lights and the antiseptic scent confirmed to you that you were in the ER, likely an hour or two after the incident in the woods. The memory of the trail quickly flooded your thoughts, and a pang of sorrow gripped your heart as you recalled Willow's final moments before she fell off the cliff. The poor horse had lost her life, while the one responsible for her tragic death remained alive, save for the bandage wrapped around your arm.

“Why did you ride into the woods alone?” Gen persisted with her barrage of questions, standing by your bed as you attempted to sit up. “Are you suicidal or what? Riding your horse in a dangerous trail like that—”

“You know what, maybe I should have just died back there!” you snapped, wincing from the pain in your elbow. Her choice of words struck a nerve in you. “Maybe I’d prefer that over sitting here, listening to your sanctimonious lecture like you're so perfect yourself! How obnoxious.”

“Then, maybe you shouldn’t be riding so recklessly and causing alarm to everyone else!” 

“Did I literally ask you to come save me?!” 

The atmosphere around you two just became even more uninviting, with discomfiting silence seeping through as you and Gen were engaged in a sharp glaring contest. Your father stood behind her, clearing his throat to cut the tension. 

“That’s enough, Gen.” Your dad placed a hand on her shoulder, and although she wanted to protest, she knew better not to keep stirring the pot after receiving his strict gaze. “Let’s just be thankful your sister is safe. There’s no need to be so overwhelming.” 

You rolled your eyes, drawing in a deep breath before you looked away from them. None of them would ever understand your pain unless they were in your position. They didn’t carry the same baggage as you, so they would never fully comprehend the weight of your suffering. You had already dealt with similar pain on your own before and that was why you didn’t need any of them to come to your aid, meddling with your life like they knew exactly what you were going through. “Just leave me alone, you guys. I wanna rest.”

Since when did your relationship with your sister start to get rough? It wasn’t really like this before, but ever since she started to become too overprotective over you and your choices in life, particularly choices linked to Satoru, Gen had started to become insufferable in your eyes. She was acting too much like a mother; controlling your decisions, lecturing you about your personal relationships, being too involved with your private life. There, ever since that, you started to distance yourself from her, and she didn’t like that. Her stubbornness wouldn’t allow her to cease acting like this mature, picture perfect big sister to you. 

With that said, Gen would have normally gotten annoyed when you asked them to leave you alone, but this time around, she seemed to have reflected on her insensitivity a lot better with your father around. “I’m sorry, okay?” she said, her tone still tinged with stubbornness, “I just got worried. I don’t know what’s gotten into you to put yourself in danger like that, but… please, Y/N. If you’re going through something, you can always speak to us. Dad and I, we’re here for you.” 

To be fair, if you had to put yourself in their shoes, it really would have been alarming to know that your sister almost died. This wasn’t the first time you were at death’s door either, so they were probably scared shitless when they were informed of your situation. Your absolutely reckless situation. You didn’t mean to cause a scene, neither did you intend to bother them on their already busy schedules. You just had so many things in your mind while you were horseback riding, too engulfed by your own sorrow that you didn’t realize the repercussions after the incident had already taken place. 

“I’m sorry, too.” Your voice softened with humility. “I didn’t mean to worry you guys. It was just really an accident.” 

Of course, Gen suspected it was more than just an accident. Your dad did, too. It was obvious on their forlorn faces that they were worried for your mental and emotional well-being, but none of them dared address the elephant in the room. It seemed they didn’t need to, anyway, since one of the many reasons that contributed to your earlier breakdown took a peek from behind the curtains, clearing his throat and sending you a look of sympathy. 

“Y/N?” Toji looked at your father and your sister for approval before stepping further inside your space in the ER. “Can I talk to you?” 

There was no escaping Toji’s presence anymore. No more hiding, no more avoiding. You knew you had to have this talk with him no matter how many times you ignored his flood of texts and calls. While this may have struck as an opportune moment for him to speak to you in person, facing the painful truth of your situation weighed heavily on you. Besides, hadn’t the irony presented itself right there? If Satoru were the one trying to speak to you, even if he was the father of your child, Gen would have been quick to lash out at him. Yet with Toji, even with the general knowledge of what had transpired between you two, your sister still showed no hostility towards him, allowing him to approach you freely and without interference.

But then again, Toji was far from being a cheating, manipulative scumbag who not only caused you suffering but also sought to selfishly acquire your family’s company. Therefore, he wasn’t considered a threat. 

Alright, then. Since Toji genuinely wasn’t a threat to your current emotional state, you agreed to talk with him. It was the first time you had seen the not-so-confident side of Toji Zen’in. He was typically a man of virtue, often holding his chin high, offering the best advice, and having insightful perspectives on life. However, it seemed you had shattered that confidence in him. You could sense his cautiousness around you as he stood by your side in the ER, assisting you with your needs, and eventually agreeing to your request to walk you to the rooftop garden.

“I don’t really think there’s anything else we should talk about.” It was you who first broke the silence, staring at the cityscape while sitting on a wheelchair. The calm breeze allowed your mind to seize the moment with a peaceful mind. “I already heard what you had to say.” 

Toji found it better to kneel down in front of you to meet your eyes as he spoke to you in a sincere and earnest voice. “Y/N, I was drunk when I said all that shit back there. I didn’t mean them. I didn’t mean to hurt you with my callous words, and I feel awful that you had to hear them from me. You trusted me. You sought comfort from me. I wasn’t thinking like a normal person when those things came out of my mouth.” 

“That doesn’t mean they weren’t true,” you replied with quiet resignation. It was the acceptance in your face that seemed to have caused Toji’s heartbroken gaze. “It’s okay, Toji. I think, when you said all those things, it actually made me realize some aspects of our relationship that had to be addressed. It made me more self-aware and it opened my eyes on the bigger picture.” You touched his hand, giving it a comforting squeeze as you mustered the courage to speak your next words. “It’s for the best that we part ways. It’s not fair to me to become a placeholder for your wife the same way it isn’t fair to you to have to deal with my ex-husband always being present in my life. Our unresolved feelings won’t really be resolved by being together.”

“Y/N…” Toji’s voice hinted at his vulnerable emotions, though he restrained himself from showing it fully. And you didn’t miss the apologetic look he had presented to you. “Despite all that, I hope you know that I’d been true to you. I do love you and will always love you. I’ll always be someone you can rely on, someone you can seek comfort from, someone you can turn to when you need help…” 

Damn it. Why did he have to make it sound like an actual break up? Now, it tugged at your heartstrings and hit you in a place it shouldn’t have. You weren’t good at these things and it certainly was your first time dealing with such a mature and mutual separation, but wasn’t that a good thing? No further drama was to happen, leaving a stark comparison to your separation with Satoru. While this one didn’t hurt as much, it still brought a hollow feeling in your chest. 

“Same for me,” you agreed, displaying a weak smile. “You’ll always have a spot in my heart, Toji. I’ll always be grateful that I met you.” 

Sometimes, two people didn’t need to be together to love each other. Friendships could still thrive between ex-lovers, and that was why closure was so important. It not only closed a certain chapter of your life in a healthy way, but also allowed you to heal and open yourselves to a new beginning without any bitterness left behind. 

It shouldn’t be considered bad to remain friends with an ex. It also shouldn’t be bad to give a parting kiss from said ex, right? 

You weren’t the one who initiated it, after all. It was Toji’s hand that gently stroked your cheek. It was him, who leaned forward and pressed his lips onto yours. It wasn’t forceful, but neither was it passionate. It was simply a tender kiss of goodbye, feeling the warmth of each other’s lips for one last time before you two would transition from being lovers to friends. What you didn’t understand from this supposedly bittersweet moment was the faint tears that somehow managed to escape your eyes, perhaps because you knew that once Toji left, you would be alone again. 

You had no one by your side to love you, cherish you, choose you, and offer their entire world for you. You were meant to live this cruel world all by yourself. 

As he pulled away, he pressed his forehead against yours. “Please learn to love yourself before anyone else, Y/N. It’s what you need and what you deserve.” 

That night, while you were getting your MRI, your mind kept flying to the possibilities of a future without having anyone by your side. Any normal person would tell you to focus on loving yourself first, as Toji did recently, focusing on what matters most, and ridding yourself of the toxic things that hinder you from moving forward with your life. Things weren’t as easy as they sounded. Besides, it was different being on the receiving end of the said advice. How could you do those things when the primary cause of your pain was someone whose life would always be linked to yours forever? 

Based on the result of your MRI scans, your doctor recommended that you undergo elbow arthroscopy. It was just a minimally invasive procedure compared to open surgeries, but considering how much of an overthinker your dad was when it came to your health, he insisted on your confinement at the hospital until you had been completely cleared of any other issues. He really placed a big deal on your condition and emphasized to the doctors that they make sure nothing was missed. It could have been worse; you could have had a broken hip or a fractured leg, but at least you only had a dislocated elbow. Nothing that couldn’t be easily corrected by surgery and physical therapy. 

The decision was for you to stay there for two days, and on your first night, a crying Sachiro ran inside your private room because his ‘mama has a boo boo’. Gen said he was picked up from daycare and dropped off at the hospital because the poor kid was looking for you. She didn’t mention who dropped your son off to you, but you could tell it was Satoru. You could sense it by the glances she exchanged with Ian after you asked how Sachiro came to the hospital. 

So, in that case, Satoru must have found out about your little incident and didn’t care enough to see you. Did he not even have an ounce of care anymore? Or was it Gen who stopped him from seeing you? 

“Did you ask him to leave?” you confronted Gen in a mellow voice, rubbing Sachiro’s back as he snuggled into you on the hospital bed. 

Your sister knew exactly which man you were referring to, and she denied having done such. “No, I didn’t even talk to him. He took Sachi here and left.” 

You didn’t know why you looked at Ian to confirm the truth of his wife’s words, but hurt yourself upon seeing his bowed head. It was an apologetic expression that did signify your ex-husband’s blatant act of ignoring you. To hear about your near-death experience and simply leave without even checking on you should be your wake-up call. He didn’t care anymore. No, why should he care? He had Akemi. His only responsibility with you was to be a supportive father to your son. 

Why did the pain in your heart feel far more agonizing than the discomfort on your dislocated elbow?

If anything, you wanted to ask for the strongest anesthetic they could offer to numb your pain. You were desperate to have anything even if they had to put you into an eternal sleep. That would have been much easier to deal with than feeling disregarded by a person you supposedly had moved on from. Satoru did nothing wrong here. It was you who had that expectation, only to disappoint yourself when things didn’t happen as you imagined. 

And just when you thought things would get better as long as you ignore your torturous thoughts, it didn’t help that being in the hospital kept giving you flashbacks of the time you were in this exact room, hearing Satoru crying helplessly from outside and begging for you not to terminate his child. What comes around certainly goes back around. Or worse. 

Such depressive thoughts had you occupied throughout your stay there, and your unusual placidness alarmed the nurses instead of being assured that you were doing well. You heard your doctors telling your father and sister to always keep a close eye on you as the incident may not seem serious, but the trauma would undoubtedly be present somewhere and somehow. Were they aware? Of your intrusive thoughts of wanting to hurt yourself? 

The elbow arthroscopy was successful and by the second day, you were free to go home. You were placed on certain medications to help with the swelling and the pain, and while you were walking around the hospital with a listless mind, you happened to pass by the Obstetrics and Gynecology Department. What a deja vu it was, remembering the time you had seen Satoru there waiting outside for Sera. Back then, it was one of the climactic events in your life that led to a domino effect on the downfall of your marriage. Not that you were reminiscing, but it did remind you that Shoko was probably there in her consultation room and it would be nice to talk to a friend who had witnessed the wild history of your marriage. 

You asked Gen to wait for you in the car while you headed to Ieiri’s consultation room, assuring your visibly worried sister that everything was fine and that you wouldn’t take too long. You had to give Gen some slack, because despite the strains in your relationship as sisters, she was still always there for you. At the end of the day, she was family. 

Shoko, on the other hand, was the next closest thing you had for a sister. She welcomed you inside her room in a very worried embrace, telling you that if she had known about the incident, she would have gone straight to your hospital room on your first day, but you told her not to worry about it and understood that being in the medical field already had her schedule tight. 

“Well, I guess it’s perfect that you’re here, too.” Shoko smiled warmly, sitting behind her desk. She had exciting news to offer, it seemed. “I just wanna say that… of course, I’ll still be sending you a formal invitation and everything. I actually have a few gifts along with it.” 

You shared her enthusiasm. “Hmm… is it what I think it is?” 

The wedding. The most eventful day of her life would be arriving soon and you were the first one to hear it. 

“Yes!” she answered, with the utmost joy coruscating from her eyes. “I want you to be my maid-of-honor, Y/N. I’d be extremely happy if you could make it. I know you just got into an accident, but it won’t be until two months, so—”

“Hey, it’s okay.” You eased her worries by chuckling. “I’m completely fine, of course I’ll be there. I can’t miss it.” 

Shoko was grateful to hear your answer, relieved even, because by asking you to be her maid-of-honor, you should already understand who Suguru’s best man would be. That was a touchy subject for you and she was keenly aware of it, but you didn’t want her to worry. You didn’t want your relationship with your ex-husband to have a negative impact on the relationship of all the other people surrounding the both of you. It was already bad enough that Shoko and Suguru almost called off their engagement after they fought over their morals as you and Satoru’s friends, and you were glad that they somehow made things work. They somehow set aside their disagreements and ultimately chose their love over anything else. 

Their love was beautiful, and while that wasn’t something you could easily have, it was something you deeply admired. 

“Where are you guys planning to hold your wedding?” you asked, steering the conversation away from any mention of your ex-husband. “Here or overseas?” 

She delighted you with her answer, sounding as if this was the perfect wedding she had always dreamed of. “It’s an intimate wedding on the lakeside. Suguru chose the location, actually, since he wanted our wedding to have the view of Mount Fuji.” 

“That’s perfect,” you said with wide eyes. “Lake Kawaguchiko?” 

“Yep. That’s exactly where it’d be.” She smiled with her eyes. “You know this resort… Hoshinoya Fuji? We already booked the place, and we have a luxury cabin for friends and families to stay at.” 

You had been there before, but you were too young to remember. All you knew was that it was a high-end resort that had the best panoramic views of Lake Kawaguchiko and Mount Fuji. The hotel owner was also a close friend of the Gojou family, so that was probably why they were able to rent the entire place for the wedding, especially at a peak season for tourists. 

Since the fall season was arriving, you could only imagine the stunning views of the autumn foliage there. It offered the perfect weather, too. It wouldn’t be as hot as summer, nor as freezing as winter. Surely, it would be nice to do some nature walks and stargazing, maybe ride a boat or bathe in a hot spring. You looked forward to it, except for the fact that your ex-husband would also be there. 

And just what a perfect timing it was, because as Shoko sorted through her patients' medical records above her desk, a file slipped from the pile, revealing the name of your very friend, Akemi. 

“Oh,” Shoko murmured apologetically as she retrieved the record, not wanting to ruin the mood of your conversation. “She, uh, came by a few days ago... with Gojou.”

You didn’t need to ask. You didn’t need to hear any further detail. Akemi’s visit likely revolved around her desire to conceive, as she wouldn’t have visited Shoko otherwise. Why? If it were simply to monitor her polycystic ovary, why did she choose Shoko instead of her own gynecologist? Thinking of how your ex-husband and best friend were attempting to start a family together left your heart shattered in unimaginable pieces, stirring up painful memories of your pathetic marriage with Satoru and reopening old wounds you thought had already healed from. Wasn’t it ironic that a couple of years ago, you were crying over the same situation with Sera? 

You couldn’t stand this feeling anymore. You thought you had already freed yourself from the pain of loving him, yet here you were suffering from the same heartbreak over and over and over again. Tears threatened to spill, but you held them back, the ache in your chest too raw to confront just yet. 

“It’s funny.” Although you displayed an outward smile, the sadness in your voice reflected your otherwise inward thoughts. You didn’t know why you said that. You were just too… too emotional. Almost like you couldn’t breathe. “He was never this passionate with me. They seem so in love.” 

Ieiri’s eyes carried sisterly concern in them. “Y/N, it’s not really what you think.” 

Was it? You weren’t sure what to feel anymore. You certainly weren't there to hear it anymore, either. Satoru chose her, just like what you wanted for him to do. Just like what you asked him to do. He had moved on, he had found someone who would love him for who he was, he had chosen the woman he would share the rest of his future with. Call yourself ridiculous for even feeling hurt about it, because you had no right to be and you definitely chose this. Either you own up to it, or you cry about it for the rest of your life. 

Both choices had no happy endings. 

— —

When Satoru learned about your incident in the woods, he thought he was going to lose his mind. 

Was it out of love that he swiftly left the office in the middle of a meeting just to get to where you were? 

He still had to pick up Sachiro from daycare, and he felt bad telling his son on the way to the hospital that his mother was hurt. It actually gave Satoru a hard time explaining to the 3-year old that they had to go to the hospital because his mommy was there and that she had an unfortunate encounter while riding a horse. 

“Dada, is… is mama okay?” Sachiro pouted with wide, tearful eyes as he clung to his father’s hand. “Sachi wants to go to mama!” 

“She’ll be okay, Sachi.” Gojou carried his son and soothed him as they went inside the hospital, searching for you. “Mommy’s strong, remember?” 

Was it out of love that he wanted to be the person that brought your son to you when you most needed him? 

According to the nurse, your room was on the seventh floor, but when he got there, your room was empty. It was Ian who told him that you went up the rooftop garden to get some fresh air, insisting that if Satoru wanted to go and talk to you, that it was best to leave Sachiro with them. 

And so he did. He ran hastily, almost out of breath, until he reached the rooftop, scanning every face within the vicinity until his tired blue eyes finally landed on you. 

Satoru laughed in disbelief. He scoffed bitterly, with each breath full of disgust. The tips of his fingers felt cold, while his breathing grew thin and ragged. He could feel his stomach clenching at the humiliation of seeing you engaged in an intimate make-out session with Toji Zen’in. 

How sickeningly sweet. 

At that point, he was laughing at his own expense, ignoring the elderly lady who looked at him like he was a crazy person. He stood there frozen for a few minutes, watching you kiss another man before it finally woke him up from reality. 

It was out of love that he let you go. 

You see? This was where his attachment to you would lead him. It was pure and unreasonable selfishness, but he would gain nothing at all from even seeing you. He didn’t need to care for you at all, no. You had Toji. You seemed to be goddamn happy with your life with Toji. And what a romantic fucking moment that was, too. 

Satoru couldn’t think straight when he hurriedly left the hospital and got inside his car. He desperately wanted to forget the painful image of you locking lips with somebody else. How? How would he? Fuck! He was mad, mad at himself for choosing to come to your aid like he still had any role in your life. He was disgusted at himself for ignoring Akemi’s calls after promising her a movie date after work. He couldn’t believe he had her waiting all by herself in that cinema, waiting for him to come while he was stupidly running around the hospital to see his ex-wife. 

You chose Toji, then you better be happy. Satoru hoped you were happy, and that wish came from a place of genuineness. He genuinely hoped the best for you. Because for him, it was time to fully let go and stop himself from trying to be the superhero whenever you were in danger. You weren’t his wife anymore. 

So, was it out of love that he headed straight to Akemi’s apartment that night with a bouquet of red roses? 

She didn’t know what happened nor was she given the full detail as to why he unintentionally stood her up on their date night. He had just briefly explained that he had to drop Sachiro off to you at a hospital because you got into a small accident. Akemi, being your friend, got immediately worried upon hearing the situation and asked if Satoru was able to check on you. 

He said no. He said Toji was there. He said he left as soon as dropped Sachiro off. 

And in an effort to apologize for not paying attention to the current woman in his life, Satoru pulled Akemi in a tight embrace. He held her in her arms, drunk from the sweet and citrusy notes of her perfume, before pulling away to kiss her. He kissed her with the same passion as you did with Toji. Perhaps even more, even better. He completely devoured her lips, with a hand on her cheek and the other on her waist. The taste of her tongue was sweet like strawberries, while her lips were red like cherries. 

This woman was all he needed. 

But was this love? He didn’t know. It was too soon to tell, too early to answer, too hasty to even consider. 

— —

The current situation you were in reminded you of your younger self after your mother had died. It was the same before; you never left the house, often locking yourself in your room, shutting yourself off from the world, and drowning yourself with the pain and loneliness of losing somebody important. 

Sure, no one really died for you to be acting this way right now, but the feeling was still the same. Was this really a comeuppance to all of your wrongdoings before? But just how terrible were you of a person to be hit by this unbelievable truckload of sorrow? You might as well spur on the physical pains of your angina again if this torment continued. Otherwise, how else do you avoid it? 

You were being a terrible mother, too. You were too engrossed by your own misery that you couldn’t even properly take care of Sachiro. He didn’t deserve to have an incompetent and irresponsible mother like you. He deserves someone better, someone like Akemi, who not only has all the motherly traits a woman should have, but also the physical and mental capacity of being a true, strong woman. 

Sachiro was bound to have that, anyway. Now that his father was planning his lifelong journey with another woman, and now that he was trying to build a happy family with her, you were no longer needed in the picture. There was no need for you. 

How many more times would you tell that you have accepted it? 

Because, god be damned, you knew you couldn’t. You knew you were lying to yourself when you said everything was fine, lying to Satoru when you told him you didn’t need him in your life anymore, lying to Toji for telling him that you wanted to marry him, lying to Akemi that you didn’t care if she was seeing your ex-husband, and lying to Sachiro when you promised to him that you would never leave his side. You were a liar. A terrible liar. A pitiful, terrible liar. 

How would you tell the universe that you couldn’t take it anymore? That, for once, you wanted to be showered by happiness and all the good things in life? 

Sera was right. Not everyone could have it all. There were people of lesser fortune who weren’t blessed to live a lavish life like you, yet still work hard to achieve what they want. Why couldn't you achieve your own happiness without blaming it on the universe? If this was simply a lesson, then weren’t you the top student at this rate? 

God. God, help me. You really didn’t know how to deal with this life anymore. You weren’t sure how to proceed. You couldn’t rely on anything other than the bottle of alcohol on your hand—what was once full was now half empty after you took another swig. This was your second bottle already, wasn’t it? Or third? 

You got up from the floor and failed to walk in a straight line as you made your way towards the balcony. Your steps were unsteady, wavering like a leaf caught in a gentle breeze. With each attempt to move forward, your body swayed from side to side, struggling to maintain balance. You almost lost grip of the bottle you were holding. No, it did, in fact, slip from your hand and ended up crashing into the floor. Shards of glass lay across the ground, ready to pierce the soles of your feet to mirror the same physical pain your heart was experiencing. 

“Stop,” you muttered under your breath, begging for your chest to stop hurting. But it only worsened, and your antidote to that was to wash it down with even more liquor. No matter how expensive it was, you didn’t even like the taste of alcohol. You hated the sting on your throat whenever you drank it. You despised the bitterness it left on your tongue. However, it did great at numbing your emotions. 

It just felt wrong in many ways that you were seeing Satoru’s face whenever you closed your eyes. You could see his smile, his loving eyes, his beautiful lips. You missed his embrace, his kiss, his touch. You missed hearing his I love you’s. Him. You missed him. You yearned for him. Three goddamn years, and you were still undeniably in love with him. 

“Satoru…” you cried, sitting on the floor. Each breath made it harder and harder for you to catch as tears continued to stream down your face. You were tired of pretending, denying that you no longer had feelings for him when you knew deep down that you would always choose him. “S-Satoru… come back to me, please.”

Was it him coming inside your room? Or was it your vision making a fool out of you? 

“Baby, what are you doing?” Satoru’s expression was engulfed in immense worry as he knelt down and reached out to you, touching your cheek and looking at your eyes somberly. “Don’t do this yourself, Y/N.” 

Your head hung low, your gaze unfocused and glazed, as you fought to keep your eyes on the path ahead. You had to reach him. You wanted to touch him, hug him. And despite your best efforts, your movements were disjointed and erratic, betraying the effects of the alcohol coursing through your veins.

“Y/N, that’s enough.” Gen had to use force just to be able to snatch the bottle away from you, forcing you to wake up to the reality where Satoru no longer existed to be there for you. It was her who came rushing inside your room in the middle of the night. The bottle of liquor was now spilled all over the floor. The same could be described with your emotions. “Get it together. You haven’t been acting like yourself lately!”

You couldn’t, even if you wanted to. You were in delirium after having dealt with all the terrible things the world had thrown at you. If you couldn’t drown yourself in alcohol, how else would you have been able to numb the pain? How else would you have been able to… forget? 

As much as your sister tried to hide the obvious sympathy in her voice, even your drunken mind could recognize it. “We all know you’re going down the depression lane again, but never to this extent.” Her voice cracked in the middle of her sentence, cradling you into her arms as a tear fell down her face. The Gen who would usually lecture you, was now holding you in her arms as her only baby sister. “Stop this, Y/N, please. Don’t ruin your life the second time. I-It’s hurting me. It’s hurting Dad. Do you… do you realize what Sachiro’s gonna think of you when he sees you like this?” 

“Gen…” Muffled sobs unwillingly came out of you, leaving you with such excruciating pain in the chest, so much so that it didn’t even feel like you had done surgery to fix your (quite literally) broken heart.  “I w-want him back,” you continued to cry, “I want my husband back. I want to be with h-him, Gen.” 

“Y/N.”

“Where’s S-Satoru…? D-Did he leave? Please take me to him—”

“Y/N, listen to me.” She gently cupped your cheeks, forcing you to look at her pained eyes. “You’re intoxicated. He was never here, and he’d never come for you. You have to let it go.” 

“But—”

“He’s not good for you. He never will be.”

— —

It had been two weeks since Satoru last heard about you. Miwa was the one who updated him that you had already returned to your family’s mansion, letting him know that you were okay and that you were recovering well. Frankly, Satoru was starting to get annoyed at the fact that his secretary was still giving him updates about you. What did he care? He wasn’t your husband anymore. 

Besides, Toji was probably visiting you every day, so why did he have to worry about you? If there was anyone he should be worried about, it was Akemi. She had been experiencing terrible pelvic cramps lately, which needed to be given serious attention, but you would never see her being dramatic about it. The only thing she needed was for Gojou to accompany her visits to the OB-GYN, and even then, she never showered herself in self-pity. She carried herself like an independent woman, and that was exactly what Satoru needed in his life right now. 

He had a son to raise. He had a company to run. It wasn’t the perfect time to commit himself to someone lawfully. Heck, he didn’t even believe in marriage anymore. He realized that two people could still love each other without getting married. As long as Akemi didn’t pressure him about such things, he was fine with having her around. She didn’t ask for anything much, anyway. 

As for you, well… 

“What are you planning with that mansion you gifted Y/N?” asked Nanami, seated on the couch inside Satoru’s office, casually reading a newspaper. “Do you even remember that?” 

He certainly did. “What about it?” he questioned, idly toying with a pen on his desk. “It’s her property now. She can sell it if she wants.”

Better yet, you should let Sachiro inherit the property someday. His son was already set for a life of privilege having wealthy parents on both sides, but wouldn’t the mansion be a substantial addition to his assets in the future? Satoru couldn’t help but envision the kind of man his son would grow up into. He hoped Sachiro would not inherit his father's immaturity and pettiness but would embody the kindness and altruism of his mother. From a business perspective, however, Satoru planned to groom his son to be a leader, as he was the sole heir to the Gojou Group. Additionally, he would also inherit half of Creston and the entirety of Hearte. No wonder Sachiro was recently listed as the wealthiest kid by Forbes Japan. He even beat Megumi Zen’in from the list even though the teenager was the heir of the Zen’in business empire. 

These were the thoughts that should consume Satoru—the future, not the past. His kid, not you. And he was right about doing so, because when he came home to his penthouse, he was told that he had a visitor. 

A visitor on a Wednesday afternoon? 

Your brother-in-law, the esteemed prosecutor who sent his evil stepmother to jail, appeared on his front door, carrying Sachiro in his arms. It was hard to tell what type of emotions were visible on the man’s face, but he definitely didn’t bring any good news. 

“Ian?” Satoru promptly made way for the man to come in, ushering him into the penthouse and allowing him to set Sachiro down. The young boy was quick to dart off to his playroom, leaving the two men in an uncomfortable silence. “What’s going on? Weekends are usually my schedule with Sachi.” 

Ian cleared his throat, a hand on his pocket. “Do you mind looking after Sachiro for the time being?” 

By saying ‘for the time being’, it seemed like Ian wanted to actually say ‘until further notice.’ But that confused Satoru even more, because what was happening for the man to come here and ask him to let Sachiro stay beyond the agreed schedule with his father? He couldn’t read through Ian’s expression and it was making him uneasy. 

“I can, but… why so suddenly?” Gojou asked, glancing at his oblivious son. 

“It’s Y/N’s idea, Gen doesn’t know about it.” Ian released an awkward chuckle. “You know how my wife is.” 

Gen would absolutely hate it, Satoru was aware for sure. Though the questions lingered in his mind. “Why would Y/N want Sachi to stay with me? Where’s she?” 

Was it him or was Ian having a hard time explaining the situation? It felt like he was walking on eggshells, deciding between what had to be said and what shouldn’t. He was careful with his words when he spoke again, “Y/N flew to Monaco this morning and will be back when she’s ready. She says Sachiro should spend all of his time with you while she’s gone.” 

Monaco? Why would you be there?

Confusion bathed Satoru’s eyes. “Is it for a fashion event or something?” 

“No, she’s just…” Ian struggled heavily. “Well, to sum it up, she has to go there to sort some things out. It’s a personal thing, but she really needs this time for herself and we think it’s the best for her right now. I don’t know how long she’s gonna stay there or when she’ll be back, but I hope you understand what I’m trying to say here.”

No, he didn’t. Satoru found it difficult to fathom his ex-brother-in-law’s words, seeing as he had no general idea of what was truly going on. But if you were flying to Monaco, surely Toji wouldn’t allow you to go there all by yourself? 

Ahh. It made sense now. I see what’s happening here. 

Satoru’s lips curled into sarcasm. You would be vacationing with the love of your life. Is that what it was? Planning your halted wedding? Choosing wedding gowns? Looking for venues? There was no way you would be flying to Monaco alone, especially without Sachiro around when you two had been inseparable since his birth. 

“What kinda mother is she?” Satoru muttered in disgust, unaware that Ian had overheard him. But Ian had heard loud and clear. How could you leave your son behind like this? Couldn’t you face your ex-husband to discuss it, instead of just dropping Sachiro off as if he were some unwanted toy?

“Hold it right there,” Ian interjected, becoming defensive at the accusation. “You have no idea what she’s going through.”

How would he know? No one was telling him shit. No one was giving him details, so did they expect him to understand things and accept them as they were? Did they do the same thing to Satoru when he was at the verge of losing his sanity asking everyone for forgiveness over and over? 

“I've never taken sides between you two, Satoru, you know that,” Ian continued, trying to maintain a calm demeanor and speak with clear judgment, “But one thing I’m not gonna let you do is call Y/N a bad mother.”

Satoru’s chest tightened at Ian's words, a mixture of guilt and frustration bubbling up inside him. He knew he shouldn’t have spoken out of turn, but the pain and resentment were too raw to contain. It felt like you were abandoning him and your child, like you were off to a new chapter in your life again, and leaving everything behind. Perhaps this was his trauma from the New York thing crawling back at him, but it definitely reminded him of the day you had abandoned him. For three fucking years. How long would it take you to return now? 

Why do you keep doing this? He was sick of it. You kept running away instead of talking to him. He gets it, people change, circumstances change, but couldn’t you at least have the decency to talk to him about it? Was it wrong for him to wish you’d handled this differently? To wish that you’d talked to him, involved him in the decision-making process, instead of just making this unilateral decision and leaving him to pick up the pieces? 

Satoru took a moment, collecting his thoughts before continuing. “It’s fine, I’ll take care of Sachi,” he reassured, “I’ll take some time off work and have ‘Kemi help me out.” 

He looked back at Ian, his eyes pleading for further details, for answers, for some semblance of clarity in the midst of this emotional turmoil.

Yet none of it was given. 

And so, would it still be wrong to assume that he could now completely forget about you? That this opportunity to be with Sachiro would allow him a chance to share it with someone else? If you spent three years of your life playing house in New York with Toji, would it still be unfair for Satoru to do the same with Akemi?