#design is subject to change especially the matrix

[trans-formers-n-stuff]

OPTIMUS PRIME!!!

i love them so much im so excited to finish my orion pax design i love them

the scarring on her mouth is inspired by @squidthesquidd 's au !! i love its stuff :3

[ct-multifandom]

AINI predictions 2

Because I keep making editing and making additions to the first one

Mizuki’s gonna accidentally call Date dad and then try to deny it and act all tsundere

Please?

The Masked Woman is either Amame or Kizuna

Looking back on the box art, I think those designs at the bottom might be the Mizuki-time ones. Amame and Kizuna, who are teens in Ryuki-time, look different, like Kizuna is missing her hat for example and Amame seems to have her hair down instead of pigtails. Interesting that that Masked Woman isn’t on the box art as her own character. Implying that she’s one of the people already there, perhaps?

the purpose of the Hidden Bats experiment is probably to test bugs in the “simulation”.

Tokiko and Naix believe in the simulation theory and want to escape the matrix. We already know they’re associated with Sunaiku and the Bats videos. One of the secret messages in the ARG talks about how superhuman abilities are considered glitches in The Simulation, so they could be testing the subjects’ SHIFT abilities to locate and break that “seam” Tokiko wants to find.

About the timeline thing from the last post

Okay so I saw on another post and in an official game preview video that there is a no-spoiler mode in the game for people getting into the games through the sequel (which is a silly thing to do but,,,) it seems like AINI is a direct sequel from the true ending of AITSF, but all the promotional material is on no-spoiler mode, which makes Date look different and removes references to the last game, for obvious reasons. This would mean that Iris got her tumor removed, Date is actually in his own Yagyuu body, and Saito and his victims are dead.

Hidden Bats, like AI and ZE, has branching paths, but as normal people in real life, not SHIFTers, we can only experience one route

This one is kinda crack and stretchy, but I can’t get over the Phia Hanadate asset. Maybe it means literally nothing and I sound like the person who thinks actual trash in an escape room is a clue, but someone got paid to sit down and draw that portrait. If she was replaced by Iris at the last minute, she must’ve had a story prepared. Maybe she was the one who hit Kairo while driving recklessly or under the influence or something, and then later coincidentally became a victim of whatever criminal activity he was involved in? Some people think Uchi was trolling dataminers, but would he really make a whole character just to surprise the few people who have the skills to find her?

Maybe each experiment of HB changed based on the decision we made in the previous round. This is just me spitballing ideas, but maybe if we saved Aine and Binato or just Binato then the second experiment would have been different somehow, or if we saved either Lumina or Mariha the third would be affected. For example, maybe if Binato wasn’t removed, Phia would’ve been in Iris’s place, or if Lumina and Mariha didn’t tie, Kairo would’ve been replaced with an AI character as well. Who knows.

Date is in a polycule with all his coworkers

This is obviously already canon so idk why I’m even adding it to the post

The game will end with a group dance sequence set to Duality by Slipknot

Nah but I do predict that there will be a new dance to a new song. Iris, Amame, and Kizuna do dance together so that might lead in to a new number. I was thinking of making a post analyzing the lyrics to Invincible Rainbow Arrow because I noticed that some of the ominous words from that song seem more relevant now than they were in the first game, especially with the involvement of Naix and new lore about Iris’s tumor.

Komeji and Shoma are gonna have a wholesome yet unrelated-to-the-case subplot like the Matsushitas did. I’m actually putting a minor spoiler warning on this one because I’m so sure of it.

I think I accidentally figured out their arc from everything that’s available to us rn. Also, someone, don’t remember who, said in an interview that Komeji is one of their faves, which is interesting. Komeji is divorced and Shoma is his son. Following the game’s theme of having two halves, Komeji has two metaphorical halves, his comedian self who wears the block head, which I imagine is fake (?), and his self outside of work. If it is fake, he literally has two faces. He can’t balance these two sides at first and is always playing the comedian role, causing his wife to leave him and his son to resent him, but later on, he learns to pay more attention to his home life as well. He mends his relationship with Shoma, allowing his two halves to exist in equilibrium.

[beattycowan99]

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[pastrytree7]

Dihydrotestosterone-induced service of phospholipase C zeta and its efforts to bovine ejaculate capacitation

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[struwwelzeter]

Because i miss your design themed rants (it is good word here) i would like you to rank Rammstein album covers from designers point of view.

Ah, I love you. This got VERY ranty.

This is kinda hard because I tend to judge the entire packagaing/notes, and when I count that into it the ranking would be ever so slightly different. I’ll mention it for each I have Opinions (TM) on, but yeah, this is solely going on cover. I’ll only do the studio albums, not made in germany or the DVDs, or this will get too big.

7th: Rosenrot.

I know lots of you are gonna hate me for this. It’s not that I don’t like it, I do, it’s beautiful. Unfortunately it’s ... slightly lazy. It’s I think their most obvious cover and obvious feels like it’s good design but never truly is. It’s got that first idea feel, if that makes any sense. There is always that project where you go “uh can’t think of anything, but this works.” It’s not a bad thing, they clearly still knew what they were doing. It’s just ... that typical photoshop post apocalyptic composit that lost of metal/alternative bands did at some point. They all did it because it’s cool. No argument there. It’s just that I expect a bit ... more.

6th: Herzeleid

I know it’s iconic, but. The execution?! Terrible. The colours of their skin and that flower?! Too different to feel monochromatic, to same same to contrast nicely. Too much texture. What is that?! The positive bit is the placement of the typography because, neat! Most people fail at that. I like the blue-grey there aswell, how about you’d added that to their skin a little? No? Ok.

Also, this (Richard speaking):

“The bloody sleeve! What a crazy situation that was. We approved the photos in a car park without thinking what we were letting ourselves in for. When we saw what the designer had done, we freaked! We looked so… gay! All of us stripped to the waist. It was like an ad for a gay porno film. So we had to say, sort it out. Make us look straight again. Change the sleeve.”

Who in the fuck works like this?! Nevermind, I know it was a considerably younger Dirk Rudolph, but fucking hell, have some self respect, all of you. I know they didn’t know what they were doing, they probably had the management/record company comission it, and that was still the time graphic designers were seen as just pixel pushers from that time it took 3 days to layout a poster. Still. What was that brief?! Could you have sat down for 20 minutes and talk, perhaps?! Also, I hope this is how Richie learned to be the nightmare client I know he is. Don’t approve layouts in a car park, what the fuck is wrong with you.

It’s a pity because the concept? Nice. Sculpted men infront of flowers, what else do you want from life. Why crysanthemes, tho? Too textured in that macro shot. What is that photo angle?! Might try and redo that if I ever feel like it.

5th: Reise, Reise

This breaks my heart a little, because it’s my lonely island album. And it isn’t bad by any stretch. Actually, their album cover game is ridiculous, can I have that established as a general benchmark? It would make for a lot less mental break downs. The thing is ... I like the idea. Make it look like the black box, cool. The problem is the type. It makes it look like “Flugrekorder Nicht Öffnen” is the album title. To be fair, Typesetting is my main thing, and album artists get it wrong (imo) 99 out of 100 times. I wish they would have comitted more and just left the titel off and solved it with a slide in, or a sticker or something like that. It’s just a bit ... weird. What works brilliantly is that it’s very memorable, stands out on the shelf, is unusual, all of that. It’s iconic. I do like it very much but I had to place something here.

4th: Liebe ist für alle da

Now the thing with that album is that it has two covers. If I’d gone by the original one, I’d have to place it behind Reise, Reise. Everything RR has in impact, this is missing. It’s too dark, has too many pieces, it won’t stand out on a shelf. Especially not in the CD age when it was on 12x12 cm. Even on a Vinyl, it’s ... just not that impactful. Sure, the photograph is beautiful but meh. Luckily there is a second option. And that - is almost like a logo. It works as a symbol, and that makes it so strong. Less is more. Brilliant. You can draw it from memory. It’s so iconic, the kind of stuff that starts showing up in subways, drawn on the back of a seat and sprayed on walls. Tell me you never wanted to paint that on a flag and take it to a pride parade. I am sure some of us have.

I do want to mention the booklet in this, because it does bump it up a little too, because where the panorama image fails as a cover, the inside is done so beautifully with the fold out, the type setting, everything. It’s special, and done with love and it shows.

3rd: Mutter

There is just something about this that is so, so, so memorable. Everyone recognises this. If you ask anyone over the age of 20 to describe Rammstein with an album cover only to someone less familiar, is anyone gonna say anything but “they’re the band with the embryo in close up”?! Maybe this is subjective because that’s how I first got exposed to them, but I don’t think so. It’s such a powerful image. It’s both beautiful and uncomfortable, the way Rammstein as a whole and that album in particular is beautiful and uncomfortable. It’s stunning. That’s it. Unfortunately, this one falls apart inside. The went too far with the whole Matrix inspired cyber elements. It’s trendy and trendy never stands the test of time, in that it has the same problem Rosenrot has, but much worse because it’s not even done that well. They could have just used the photos and kept it raw. The type setting on the cover is as good as it gets with albums tho, so I am happy.

2nd: Sehnsucht

Ah, Sehnsucht. The most perfect band shoot they ever had. Helnwein just ... did it. I don’t know, it both defined and summed up who they are aesthetically for the longest time. It’s the visual statement that says “this is Rammstein”. It ... just looks like a band that sings about heartbreak and necrophilia is supposed to look like. Don’t you agree? How else would it look like? Even that omniously coloured beach. It’s as if the predicted the mood of True Detective, only less Hollywood. That darkness we don’t want to see, that can happen anywhere. And where they fell short with Mutter, where they added too much on to these powerful images, they just added the type. Granted, it was the 90s so it’s slightly experimental type. But unlike most type in the 90s it stood the test of time. Add the whole variable cover versions and chefs kiss! Beautiful work. Makes me happy and emotional and ugh.

1st: The White Album

I’m just calling it that now. The Matchstick. You know, good design is made up from three components only: Concept. Commitment. Execution. The concept of this is so streamlined and clean. It’s the entire Rammstein story narrowed down to a single little thing. It’s small and ordinary looking but it can become dangerous and big. It’s underestimated. A little piece of wood with a head of phosphor and calium chlorit and yet you can commit the most legendary arson. It’s the personification of the thing that has become synonymous with them: Fire. It says so much with so little. And then they comitted to that. No useless typography, a simple but oh so well done photoshoot, the simple text on white. They didn’t ad too much additional ideas on to it, they trusted that one to carry and it does. They could have done without the black and white match stick arrangements inside, although I’m not even sure if that’s not just a limited edition thing, it’s a bit too much almost. They got scared a little there. The execution is also well done, I have very little to critique, only that I feel it lacks a tiny bit of love. The thing is, the more minimalist you go, the more love you have to put into each element. I feel like the spacing of the type should have been fixed in a few places but honestly that is being very very picky. Or not. Because if it wasn’t for that, and the teeeeny tiny commitment issue, this should have been a candidate for the packaging grammy. I mean it should be even the way it is, but we all know how those fuckers ignore our boys.

I’m done. Can I use this as application? Do you think if I send them a run down of basically tearing them apart they will hire me?

[taekooktimeline]

Ask

Kayla will focus more on the latest VCR’s while Sara will do so on the one where TK appear under a blue light.

Kayla: Hello! 💜I miss questions like this🥺thank you so much for submitting it, and that means a lot that you appreciate hearing our interpretation of things💜I loved this question so much🥰

Before I start, as always, please keep in mind this is simply my interpretation of things! ☺️

I agree both VCRs seem to heavily hint to deeper things with taekook. Let’s start with Jungkook’s “my time”. He has said consistently this song is about his lost childhood and growing up in the spotlight. However, I do personally think there’s a secondary meaning. I understand some are sensitive to analyzing songs, and no not every song in a member’s solo discography is directed to his lover, but here’s what made me pause - the chorus - “I can’t call ya/hol’ ya” and then, at the end, it changes to “I will call ya/I will hol’ ya”. It fits his struggles in the spotlight - the inability to reach out due to multiple difficulties (busy schedule, saesangs, etc) and eventually he is able to reach out, call, touch. In this instance, the chorus could be considered towards relationships, like a special someone. I don’t normally like Quora, but Helen Xu, an interactor on the site, is very insightful and has said something I agree with. She directly answered a question about “my time”. Below are snippets but I highly encourage reading the entirety of her answer here - https://www.quora.com/Do-you-think-My-Time-by-BTS-Jungkook-is-about-himself-I-respect-and-trust-BTS-what-they-say-but-I-can-t-help-but-feel-that-this-song-is-for-his-significant-other-I-really-hope-so-tho-because-I-love-that-for-him-but 

Keeping in mind this, we can examine the VCR a little more closely. Jk looks at a lot of clocks on the walls.

But only a handful are singled out and on a nightstand close by him. For me, this indicates great importance to these specific clocks.

One I am still working on figuring out is the one to the far left of Jk, right behind the phone. I can’t determine if it says 3:09 or 3:10. If it says 3:09… that’s very interesting, as it’s Yoongi’s birthday. Keep in mind, Yoongi wrote letters to only taekook in 2018 that, in Tae’s own words, made him cry for 10 mins. The members joked Jk’s letter must be a “copy paste” of Tae’s, meaning the same letter:

Jk singled out both Tae’s character, Tata, and Yoongi’s character, Shooky, to be the ones supporting Cooky directly in the ring for his 2020 B21 skit.

If the clock truly says 3:09, this is the second time Jk has directly singled out Yoongi in 2020, as well as Tae when factoring the other clock. Disclaimer - Please note this part is shaky since I can’t determine the time enough to feel confident. 

But what we can deduce - as a lot noticed, 2 of the 3 clocks next to Jk show his birthday, 9/1 - 9:01, and Tae’s 12/30 - 12:30.

The fact these are singled out from the other clocks and are closest to Jk imply to me great importance to him. He picks up the third clock closest to him.

This one has the time - zero o’clock. He holds it up and smiles at it, as if he’s embracing the new time.

Zero o’clock is about starting a new day and forgetting what troubles you. For me …factoring in the two clocks being placed in a prominent position (denoting Tae’s and Jk’s birthdays) + Jk then performs “my time” right after + my suspicions that align with Helen Xu, that the song has a secondary (hidden) meaning …for me, this indicates Jk has found his time. His time has come, he’s ready/at peace and he’s welcoming it. He’s leaving his former struggles behind and will live more freely, less restricted. 

The other part of the VCR was very interesting. Only Taekook paint their faces in black. I spoke to a few different people, who were firm that painting oneself with black indicated stigma, sin, being different, in their culture. It can also be viewed as their shadow, as BTS have discussed this extensively. Tae covers his eye while Jk covers his mouth. This reminded me of “see no evil, hear no evil” in the sense their differences/“sins” are not seen or spoken about by society. Society chooses to ignore what they’ve tried to show and say.

Jk paints his mouth black while Tae paints his eye.

After, both smirk.

For me, this indicates they’re embracing their shadow/difference. They are not bothered any further by society closing their eyes and mouths to their stigma. They have come to terms with it. They will no longer hide in their shadows/darkness. 

They also showed the shadow closing on Tae (going backwards, reverse effect, not fully closing since the door still opens for him) and the light opening on Jk - parallels of each other, and again, they are the only two with this symbolism.

What I find very interesting out of all of this is how taekook are singled out as different from the group. There is a reoccurring pattern. We saw it at MAMA 2019. Both were in blue light then, based on standing order, both were in black. (As a side note - i couldn’t find a capture that encompassed Jin in the below blue/red light):

The others are in white while Taekook are black, still hidden, in their shadow. 

We then saw them be singled out as different again in the On MV. Both were the only ones that had thorns, Tae’s on his neck and Jk’s around his wrist.

Thorns also can be symbolic of sin, just like the black paint in the VCR:

Jk even says he was cast out of society for being different.

My personal thinking which isn't necessarily applicable to the VCRs and heavy hinting: a taekook subunit is coming by the end of the year. We’ve said this consistently since about the spring, as noted in the main timeline, based on the first few vlives, some festa promo shoots and the order of the festa board.

There have been some other, more recent, indicators, but this has been my consistent stance - 1) Taekook 2) Yoonmin + Jin 3) Hobi and Joon. We’ll see! I know some have a differentiating opinion on this based on the BTS YT live with two subunits, not three + photo cards but my stance remains the same from spring. And if you disagree it’s ok! It’s only theory- it can be wrong or right. In asks I feel safer theorizing more freely since we don’t have to place as much importance on being “right”. Either way, even if I’m incorrect on the other subunit pairings, I still think Taekook will be a unit. 

BH is working to normalize - to some degree - TK after years of restricting on camera interactions. Part of normalizing, for some, will be a subunit. I feel strongly it’ll happen for that reason. Whether it’s on a BTS album, or KTH1 or JJK1, I’m not sure. But I think by December or, at the latest January, the subunit will happen on one of those three (if it doesn’t happen in November for BE). 

But I want to make it clear … I don’t think singling out Taekook from the group is solely for their subunit. Whether the subunit is on the BTS album or a mixtape, I feel very strongly we are getting one. But the reoccurring pattern of showing them as different from the other five members, with symbolisms of shadow/stigma/sin (and now embracing that)... to me indicates something even bigger is possibly brewing. I’ve got a lot of mixed thoughts I’m sorting through regarding the company’s stance right now so some of that conflicts and I just need to see in time where things go. 

Please remember this is merely MY opinion / theory on this topic, which is subjective and open to individual interpretation. If I’m wrong, I’m wrong :) theory is theory for a reason and I know some disagree on the subunit part (so please don’t flood the asks with stances - I know this is a varied opinion💜😅). All we can do is wait. 

——————————

Sara: I´ve never paid too much thought to concert VCR´s because I wasn't sure if they had enough substance...but now as I pondered I'm quite excited to share my findings. We all know Taekook were the only ones to have a blue light casted over them right? Well, this is extremely important and I’ll tell you why. 

BTS have made references to the blue & red pill dilemma from matrix on multiple occasions, the first time that I recall being in their MV for “N.O.” where they take the red pill & fight the system.

In sum, if you take the red pill you face the harsh reality while if you take the blue pill you stay in a dream-like illusion, a fake and perfect one. In the music video for “Shadow” you can see Suga singing on top of the scenario covered in blue light while everyone filmed him. This is his persona. The persona, for psychiatrist Carl Jung, was the social face the individual presented to the world—"a kind of mask, designed on the one hand to make a definite impression upon others, and on the other to conceal the true nature of the individual" = an illusion = blue pill.

  Afterwards, his shadow that was hidden among the crowd takes over and everything turns red as he faces his true hidden self = harsh reality = red pill.

What is the shadow? In short, the shadow is the unknown side. The shadow represents all the personal traits we have ignored, denied, or cut off from ourselves. Because one tends to reject or remain ignorant of the least desirable aspects of one's personality, the shadow is largely negative. There are, however, positive aspects that may also remain hidden in one's shadow (especially in people with low self-esteem, anxieties, and false beliefs). Being LGBTQ would fit into this last case as it’s not negative in nature. Jung’s concept is that the aim of one’s life, psychologically speaking, should be not to suppress or repress, but to come to know one’s other side, and so both to enjoy and to control the whole range of one’s capacities; i.e., in the full sense, to “know oneself.” That process is called “individuation” and a necessary step is to become aware of the shadow and integrate it’s hidden aspects into the consciousness.

At first the blinking blue light suffocates Tae who can be seen suffering, running around and hugging himself. Something in his interior wants to be set free.

At the end of the VCR Tae is finally standing calmly as he faces his truth, accepting it (red) -

That’s what Sinclair does in the book “Demian” that BTS based their series “Wings” on. He recounts his experiences with the two realms, two worlds of which he was aware at the time—one of darkness, and one of light, one of day and one of night. The realm of day was everything "good", straight, and Christian. The realm of night was the world of scandal and mystery, drunkenness and murder, deceit and illegal activity. The realm of light was the world of Sinclair's parents and sisters. Though living in the realm of light, he was curious about and attracted to the realm of darkness. He was tempted by Demian, who acted like an inner voice leading him to self-discovery and individuation. In the Below pic the black ink represents temptation and “sin”. Jk takes it to his mouth (in this 2016’s trailer for the Wings tour, other members use different symbolism like sinful apples, blindfolds, curtains, etc).

Jk takes a taste of this world of darkness in BS&T. The world of the previously unknown and denied shadows.

Dialogue from “Demian” that played in this scene from BS&T: “He too was a tempter. The evil world with which I no longer wanted to have anything to do”. The balloon is let go which represents lost innocence - surroundings covered in red.

As I said, the shadow is not always inherently negative, but it’s always perceived as such by either society, the individual, or both. The intro for “Wings” was “Boy Meets Evil”. When the lyrics give into the temptation the walls are painted red.

When performing this song in MAMA 2016 we can see the two realms on opposite sides. When we mix them we get a purple color representing the whole, the dichotomy of human nature (which tormented Sinclair until he accepted himself).

What are they trying to convey with this picture below?

Well, other members are letting their shadows be seen, but Taekook are showing us their carefully drafted public persona, hiding their truth. All of them do this to some extent, but this image implies Taekook’s real self drastically contrasts with the illusion that they create by wearing their masks. They have to conceal more than the rest, even if they already accepted themselves.  What you see is a pretty lie = blue. They only show us their “good” side. Just like “Fake Love’s” lyrics (a song directed to army): “Mold a pretty lie for you”, “Try to erase myself and make me your doll”.  Also, In Singularity Tae sings about silencing his voice and trapping himself into a frozen BLUE lake.

He wears a mask. The red part of his head (shadow, hidden truth) has an earring that reads “loved”. Forbidden, secret love?

Yoongi recently talked about this topic while In The Soop. He said that he talked with Bang pd nim and that, if someone has to do it (for a greater good), he himself would choose the red pill. He would sacrifice. The matrix is an ongoing theme.

About the latest VCR’s where TK have black paint, I basically agree with Kayla. They were introducing the shadow-themed section of the concert so every member was portraying the shadow in different ways but it’s definitely interesting that Taekook represented the shadow with the exact same symbolism put back to back - arguably the most visually impactful out of them - placed near the end of the VCR as it reaches it’s peak in intensity before slowly falling into quietness again. Taekook share a common aspect of themselves that is considered negative and carries a stigma and therefore - as their blue public colors indicate - is part of their red hidden shadow. They really highlighted Taekook’s scenes, so it indicates their shadow is of greater significance. It’s a bigger deal. As mentioned earlier, the black ink is related to sin.

Now JK’s VCR that introduced his song. “My time” by Jk is certainly about his crazy life while growing up in the spotlight. It’s not only about his lost childhood, but also about a “limited love”, losing the capacity to love freely during his teens and beyond. The chorus - the part of the song that delivers the main message - sings about a relationship with many physical limitations. The chosen words are pretty romantic: hold, touch, etc (discard fans as it’s a personal song). Since we talk about the spotlight, it can be understood that they can’t do those things while having eyes on them. He says “happy that we met each other” so it’s not about his family. He’s waiting for “the time” they’ll be able to love freely which he has promised will come (“I will hold ya and you know”). If we take the previous VCR’s into account it’s quite suspicious that Taekook’s clocks are placed right next to each other in the most important spot angle-wise. It does seem like a connection between Jk’s song and Taekook. 

What does all this ultimately mean? What’s the purpose of showing these hints? Well, not sure. Could be related to them coming out in the future and finding their time to live their lives as a couple without pretending, taking off their masks and revealing their truth. For the time being a TK subunit would be neat though :P 

[some-lists]

Marvel Side Characters I Want to See More Of

Here’s a list of side characters I’d like to see more of in the MCU. These are characters that have mostly been in the background and have not gotten the screen time they deserve.

This does not include characters about to get their own Disney Plus series (no Bucky, Vision, etc.), because we will be seeing more of them.

10. Sif

Sif was a great side character and a strong female warrior. The Dark World hinted at a love triangle between her, Thor, and Jane Foster. Then she disappeared and was never heard of again. I don’t miss the potential love triangle, but she was a cool character back when the only other female fighter was Black Widow. It would be nice to know what became of her. Valkyrie ultimately replaced her, but who says we can only have one strong female warrior per movie? It’s a stupid rule and I think she needs a comeback in the MCU. (Personally, I would’ve preferred her for a female Thor instead of Jane Foster.)

9. Nakia

I didn’t want to include love interests on this list, but now due to the tragic death of Chadwick Boseman, we don’t know what will happen to Nakia. She was absent in Infinity War and Endgame, and I would’ve loved to see her fight in the big battle scenes. Will she appear in Black Panther 2? I hope they do not write her out along with T’Challa (assuming they don’t replace him with a new actor).

8. Bill Foster

Bill Foster is far more likable than Hank Pym, IMO. He’s a fellow genius and a good man, who is occasionally willing to do morally ambiguous things to help someone he cares about. It’s actually a great parallel to Ant-Man himself. Laurence Fishburne was a welcome addition to the Ant-Man cast. The fools at The Matrix didn’t ask him back, and I hope Marvel doesn’t make the same mistake. More Laurence Fishburne in everything, please.

7. Maria Hill

I seriously need to see more Maria Hill. She was great in The Avengers and The Winter Soldier, but we didn’t see her again until the end credits scene in Infinity War. That’s a huge gap! She never got a chance to show us what she’s got. Personally, I kinda wish they used her instead of Sharon Carter in Civil War (minus the weird kissing scene). She’s way cool, has played an important part in previous films, and I just felt more invested in her than Sharon. Now that Samuel L. Jackson has returned to the MCU after a long absence, I’d like to see Maria Hill return too. Not just a brief cameo here or there, but with a real job to do.

6. Ned

Ned is Peter Parker’s loyal best friend. Jacob Batalon and Tom Holland have great chemistry together, and he’s super funny. Ned’s in on Peter’s secret identity and it makes it even funnier when has he has to cover for him. His one line in Infinity War is hilarious. I want to see more goofy buddy moments between Ned and Peter in future movies.

5. The Grandmaster

The Grandmaster made his appearance in Thor: Ragnarok and I need to see more of him. Taika Waititi geniusly got Jeff Goldblum to essentially be himself, and it’s glorious. I don’t know if we’ll ever see him again, but he’s way too entertaining for just a one time appearance.

4. Luis

I mentioned before that Drax was the funniest character in the MCU, but I might have to take that back. There isn’t a moment with Luis that isn’t absolutely hilarious. He asked Hope for a suit in Ant-Man and the Wasp and I think he should get one. Someone get this man a suit. Promote him. Just more screen time for this awesome character, please. Honestly, I think it would’ve been great if he had rescued Scott Lang from the Quantum Realm instead of some dumb rat. Can you imagine the 5 year recap he would’ve given Scott? Talk about perfect for this pandemic. It would’ve been too good.

3. Mantis

I love Mantis. She’s such a unique and interesting character. She’s unlike anyone else in the MCU. She’s wonderfully weird, awkward, funny, and adorable. Her relationship with Drax is both hilarious and sweet. James Gunn has said he wants a Drax and Mantis Disney Plus series, and so do I. Those two are too interesting to toss aside. Especially since Mantis has only been in two films, there’s still so much room for her to grow. I’d like to see her awkwardly learn more about emotions and social interactions. Mostly, I’d like to see her feel her own emotions instead on feeling through another person. How would she handle her own feelings of sadness or anger? And how would her powers grow as well? Will she learn to use them more aggressively? There’s so much potential here.

2. Wong

Wong is seriously underrated. He has the same awesome sorcery powers as Dr. Strange. Unfortunately, he’s stuck in a stoic Asian monk stereotype. He’s been sidelined in every film so far, and he deserves better. With Wanda scheduled to star in Doctor Strange 2, I fear Wong will be sidelined yet again. Benedict Wong is an incredible actor capable of so much more than what he’s been given. If you need proof, check out his performance as Kublai Khan in Marco Polo on Netflix. This guy should have Emmys. He has great chemistry with Benedict Cumberbatch and is funny in his brief moments. I think Wong deserves the chance to be fleshed out as a character instead of being designated the token Asian sidekick.

1. M’Baku

Endgame left a lot of my questions about Wakanda post-Thanos’ snap unanswered. I wanted to know who took over while T’Challa was gone. We saw in Infinity War that both Okoye and M’Baku survived. I hoped it meant we’d be seeing more of them as they stepped up in his absence (perhaps that was the plan for Black Panther 2?). I was disappointed that neither had much of a presence in Endgame. M’Baku was a delightful surprise in Black Panther. He’s a formidable opponent to T’Challa, a powerful leader and warrior, but also crazy funny! I hope he has a much larger role in Black Panther 2.

Again, I don’t know what’s going to happen with that film now. It’s a sensitive subject at this time. I hope M’Baku will be utilized to preserve the traditions of Wakanda after whatever changes are made in that film. Especially since T’Challa was such an important, positive male figure for the black community, I hope M’Baku can rise up to fill that need as well.

[overwatch-does-stuff]

Echo Headcanons

Because there is finally new Overwatch content AND I AM GOING TO EMBRACE IT DESPITE MY INITIAL HESITATIONS! ---

- So. Many. Questions. She is constantly asking questions. About her surroundings, about others, about herself. Question question question. It’s how she was designed. - She doesn’t mean to be annoying about it! She really doesn’t. Can you tell her exactly what is so annoying about so she can know for future reference? - She doesn’t know how to talk about herself that much. In fact, diving into too much detail about her own self makes her. . . nervous. She’d much rather listen to someone else prattle on for hours. - That’s why McCree was such a good fit for her. He’s not used to being listened to, and he has plenty of stories to tell.

- Thinking about her own personhood is a deeply scary subject for her. She doesn’t understand how people, especially humans, seem to simply. . . make their own moral values and personality. She is explicitly aware of her advanced learning matrix, but she can’t puzzle out the difference between how she thinks and how humans think. She knows that she is different. She is not human. - When she was first made, and first started participating in Overwatch strike team missions, she noted that people seemed to look at her funny. Almost like they were uncomfortable. She assumed this was because she was an Omnic at first. However, she has recently learned about a concept called the “uncanny valley effect”. She has deduced that her face is not human enough, and not robotic enough, either, to make others feel comfortable around her. - She worries about how she makes other people feel. She has also learned that when she asks directly about how she makes others feel, people will lie.  - Because she can’t get an answer, her inquisitive programs go around in circles. Does this person like her? Are they uncomfortable? How do they really feel? - (Yes, she has robo-anxiety.)

- She really, really, really enjoys reading! Fiction, nonfiction, poetry. . . she can’t get enough of it. It’s her hobby and her passion. Whenever she isn’t busy, she’s reading.  - Her favorite fiction books are simpler children’s ones. She’s a real sucker for the innocent, black-and-white worldview and heartfelt stories where everyone gets a happy ending. She knows well that the real world is different, but reading allows her to escape that knowledge for a short time. - However, her favorite nonfiction books are really, really complex. The more in-depth, the better. Engineering textbooks, deep logistical theorems, and so on.  - She doesn’t quite understand a lot of poetry yet, but that’s what’s fun! She gets to learn what all of the flowery language means. It never takes her long to crack, and then she moves on to the next one.

- She can’t stand being alone without something to do. Give her a Sudoku puzzle, a crossword, or something. Anything! She’ll go nuts without something intellectual to do.  - Which means she’s always willing to help with chores and the like. If someone needs help with a mundane task, she’s the first to volunteer to help.  - Helping people makes her feel good. She knows that it is good. This is a fact that is reinforced with her every interaction with others. She can’t possible conceive of committing cruelty.

- She can’t make decisions. She really, really, can’t. Don’t ask her. Almost any sort of independent decision stresses her out. She can’t help but be so indecisive when presented with new and conflicting information! - She is unaware that her difficulty making decisions is one of the failsafes put on her by Overwatch and Liao to prevent her from going rogue. - If you ask her what, say, her favorite color is, she’ll change her answer every time. They’re just all so good! This also goes for her favorite person, place, book, etc. - She was programmed to be an optimist. She assumes that everyone is friendly until given signs otherwise. She assumes that everything will work out until there is evidence to the contrary.  --- S/O Headcanons: - I hope you’re an extrovert, because oh boy. - She just loves! Talking! To you! She wants to know everything about you. - She also loves touching you. She’s a very touchy-feely person. This is primarily because touching is the primary trait she has observed from other romantic relationships. And she is very very in love with you and wants to show it! - She’ll happily hold you in her arms and fly you around.  - Her face is surprisingly kissable. It’s made of hard light, after all. And her lips are pleasantly warm.  - Her hands and face are warm. . . but her core is actually quite cold! She always makes sure to get you a blanket when holding you.  - She would enjoy nothing more than to have you teach her one of your favorite hobbies.

[melias-cimitiere]

Let’s assume that I am a demon

There, I said it. Let the game begin. My statement can be taken in the following ways:

1)   As a jest, aiming purely for the sake of fun and merriment.

2)   As a fact, provided other agencies perceive it as such.

3)   As psychopathology, in which case you may stop reading now.

4)   As a joke leading to something else.

I have no doubt that many of you will remember Morpheus’ phrase in the Matrix: there’s a difference in knowing the path, and walking the path. No matter the theory and the mental investment, one needs to live something in full in order to know it better. Same applies to most of the people interested in the occult, whatever path this might be. No matter how many books they read, no matter the seminars they attend or what significant authors, lecturers and experts say to them, it’s in the doing that true knowledge exists.

A large number of authors and self-styled “experts” exist, claiming various truths about the astral world, spiritual beings, the phantoms of the restless dead (wraiths of the deceased), angels and demons; in actuality very few of them have even witnessed something from the things they describe as a real, tangible experience. I agree, not many of such experiences are tangible in the physical sense, but here I mean it in the way that it can be perceived or felt through some developed sense like spirit vision or tactile aura/etheric attestation etc. It is perhaps irresponsible to other seekers to pretend to know a subject and preach about it without having true knowledge of it. As I have said before, “if something is confirmed through extensive personal experience, it can be safely assumed that the person may use it successfully as an axiomatic paradigm to live with. To continue to keep an open mind with regards to something that you've already proven numerous times is counter-productive. It also robs you of the certainty you need on which you can set foundations in order to challenge other ideas. Of course, the key word is confirmation; consistent proof is vital, with any bias carefully monitored and screened out.”

Many of you may love, respect and admire the ancient beings that once roamed the dimensions (like Dragons, Elves, etc). You might be glad to know that a number of them is still with us. No, not in the spirit. Within you…

Some of these beings (hundreds of thousands, category specific numbers vary) have hitched a long –term ride, entering the cycles of lives and deaths, just like ordinary humans. Of course, we are all human – on the outside.  But these essences prevail, and sometimes make life difficult for the one who differs from the flock, especially in these cases. These essences share some characteristics for each sub-group. In any case, compared to the approximately 7 billion humans on Earth, the few hundred thousand of them that harbor the Ancients in their being’s core.  Some have even awakened and have to come to power, or have access to their own abilities during their lifetime. Let’s assume that out of these ontological cores (OCs), about two hundred thousand have angelic ancestry and about 11-13,000 are demonic.

Now let’s go back to the beginning. I am a demon.

I know many struggle to attain gnosis, occult knowledge, temporal power and some actually achieve it. Assuming that they actually walk the walk and they know what they are talking about, they can truly have insights into the fabric of the cosmos, including potential daemonhood at the end of a long and exhausting road; despite its own rewards, the end result often brings suffering as well as knowledge, and power to ascend. Many useful things might be gleaned and become known through such a course. These people’s opinions on occult matters would have certain gravity as they got to experience firsthand what it is about.

Alright, let’s consider one such “heretical view”, after all, the demons are certainly more "practical" when it comes to matters on this earth than the angels (although there are always exceptions). Neither side is "to be banished"; both have a role to play, much like when you go to watch the games, and there are two teams, thrashing each other. If we hate one team so badly that we go shooting them, there won't be another match next season, or ever again. But let's suppose that both sides are needed in the grand scheme of things, in order for it to move into phase B. So you got the angelic forces on the 8th and on the Sephirothic Heavens, and you get the demonic forces in Daath and the Qlippothic Shell Domains. Both are needed for the system to move properly; it's like a car where opposing forces are necessary in order to guide it - turning the wheel on the left all the time isn't going to do much in the long run, same as turning on the right would equally suck if done all the time. In other words, a mastermind (like Thoth, who played both sides supporting Set and also Horus in their struggle opposing each other) maintains a delicate balance through opposing forces. That the name of the game: conflict! But not brutal, idiotic conflict; but something to generate enough change and synthesis. Angels play it by the book, citing rules and opting for Order; demons are down-breakers of change, forces of opposition and teaching through adversity. But the system is cleverly designed on all sides to cause:

a) Strife and opposition as way of improving oneself by overcoming obstacles.

b) Change, dynamic mostly so as to prevent stagnation.

c) Amorality, because both sides have their merits and flaws.

d) Purposeful gaps, "errors in construction", to allow for lesser species to mature enough so as to fix them by themselves, hence reaching to new insights and evolutionary paths.

Perhaps an assembly of forces is in need, so as to manifest a powerful new Truth upon the world.

[breakingbadfics]

Death of the author

CW: Light discussion of politics, mentions of the Alt-Right, and White Supremacists. 

Consider this a “Change of Pace” entry. I’m trying to figure out what the next essay is to be about as well as the eventual long term for this blog. 

I wrote this essay back in mid 2019, long before the idea of this blog would come to mind, it’s been lightly edited prior to posting and added to. and I think this essay shows some of my influences much more heavily than my other writings.

What does My Little Pony and The Matrix have in common?  Death of the Author. 

Death of the Author is not to be confused with “Separating the Artist from the Art,” a self explanatory concept to distance a work from a creator who’s beliefs are more than a little unpleasant, easiest example is acknowledging that, yes,  H.P. Lovecraft was a Mega-racist, however, his contributions to the horror genre have created a base that is nearly ubiquitous with the genre to this day, like wise with Orson Scott Card. this concept in itself is an especially controversial subject, but is not the focus of this piece.

Death of the Author is what allowed The Matrix, a movie with a collection of metaphors about being an lgbt person, and an activist for the rights of yourself and your allies to be grossly misinterpreted as a way to justify being a bigot, the most egregious misinterpretation being that of “The Red Pill Scene.”

In the context of the film, The Red Pill Scene is the part of the traditional heroes story where the hero “accepts the call”, Neo is quite literally making the choice to leave the safe world he’s been living in behind and embark on his adventure that will result in a death and rebirth into being The One who will save humanity. In the now very much understood to be the direct metaphor, it’s a scene in which Neo, the stand-in for a lgbt person, specifically a trans person, is being told by a much older lgbt person “You are trans, you have the choice to embrace it, but regardless of what choice you make from here on out the road ahead is going to be bumpy and rough on you, because the system around you is designed to make sure people like us aren’t able to prosper, and if you join us, you won’t be able to opt out.” 

That is the very understood metaphor that most people accept with the modern understanding after The Wachowski’s came out as Lily and Lana in the “post-matrix trilogy” reality of the real world.

However due to the Moral Neutrality of Death of the Author in other circles the Red Pill(and all the other metaphors in the film) takes on an alternative meaning. And I can be “polite” in my explaing the bad take on how this scene plays out, but just to hammer the point home we’ll get dirty so you can know where the take is coming from, The Red Pill Scene for White supremeacists, and The alt-right (but I repeat myself) is such.  Neo, a disgruntled white person is being told that the world is controlled by soulless machines. Jews, people of color, etx. Everyone around him is mind controlled and can and will attempt to stop him from saving the people smart enough to also realise they’re being held captive by non-whites and save them all. This of course, all being told to him by Morpheus, a black man. So have fun working your head around that. 

This of course the most extreme example being the most ubiquitous, poke around on chan sites and sooner or later you’ll see the phrase “red pill” having been memetically adjusted to mean “hey tell me about this thing” or even more specifically “I already had an opinion about this but either way I want you to confirm my choice.” But I digress. 

These two interpretations are so wildly on the opposite ends of the spectrum that the only commonalities between them is “You will likely need to be violent at some point” 

I’m naturally only covering the two interpretations, the matrix itself has been picked apart by an untold number of people and people interpret it in as many ways as possible in terms of philosophical meaning. That is the nature of Death of The Author. 

Death of the Author also covers in a round-a-bout fashion, selective canon, a subjective acknowledgement of canon elements throughout a long lived franchise- see; Star Wars, Star Trek, the belief that there was never any sequels to The Matrix. This variant of the philosophy allows one to be able to continue interactions with a text, specifically a text that consists of multiple volumes (or contributions, each one made by an individual author) but also deny interactions with parts that they personally dislike. 

More often than not, you can attribute the death of the author to a bad take in a case of fiction, another primary example being Fight Club, often missed for the scathing critique of unhealthy male behaviour and propped up as some sort of moral guideline for how to live your life. Which is again, not to say this is the fault of Death of The Author as a philosophy, it is morally neutral, these bad takes can more often be attribued to the simple fact that unless directly stating it most attempts at satire or parody will have a contingent of people who agree with what is said, not what is meant, and death of the author unfortunately does make that..very easy, for good, or ill. 

Where does My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic fit in with all this?  Well there are certainly alt-right members of the brony fandom who are painfully missing the point, but we’ve already dwelled on the negative enough, so let’s get happy. 

In Episode 1 of Season 1, the first part of a two part pilot, in the background of a shot during a party scene; a pony with a grey coat and blonde mane and tail is seen in the background. This particular pony stood out the most amongst other background characters due to a mistake caused by the animation staff. According to the supervising director at the time, this particular error was spotted after hasbro greenlit the episode for air, and because it amused him he chose not to order a correction so it was left in as a nice little easter egg. 

The nameless background pony would eventually be caught by 4chan among other places and very rapidly developed a following of fans and given a nickname, Derpy Hooves. This particular following and new nickname would echo back to shows staff becoming the name internally referred to by the show’s staff. 

Friendship is magic creator Lauren Faust, who also enjoyed the popularity of the character when asked in an interview would state that a character named Ditzy Doo existed in an unaired episode, that would be implied to be this particular background pony, So naturally now depending on the fan this particular character would be reffered to as either Derpy Hooves, or Ditzy Doo.  

Ditzy Doo would go on to become a recurring easter egg with in the show, something similar to that of “where’s waldo” but with horses. This practice would continue until episode 14 of season 2  where the character would have a set of spoken lines and would be addressed by name. This however resulted in a degree of controversy in which some people expressed concern that the presentation of the character was an offensive attempt at portraying people with mental or physical disabilities. This event resulted in the episode being altered in future airings and the character disappearing from the show for the vast majority of Season 3. Beyond Season 3 the character would continue to appear until season 5 where they would finally have a voiced role in the 100th episode of the show, and then eventually having another speaking role in the christmas special “The best gift ever.”  It is also worth noting that Hasbro never gave her an “official name” with almost all of Ditzy’s merchandise either having no name present, or more often than not a singular image of a muffin in place of a name, even going so far as to have “Muffins” be the credited name she was given in all voiced instances of the show. 

Muffins, Ditzy Doo, or Derpy Hooves isn’t the only case of background characters growing a large following of fans with in the show; a variety of characters have been swept up by the fans, given names and personalities built entirely out of bit gags. Lyra, Bon Bon, Vinyl Scratch, Octavia Melody, and who knows how many more have all been seen in background moments which would be built on by fans and then echo back into the staff to be integrated into the show further. One would say this is fanon but at the end of the day, the writers and show staff had very little more intent with the characters beyond “does this background character look good?” and “Does this bit part character stand out enough to automatically be recognizable for the bit they need to be doing” it is still what I believe to be an example of Death of The Author, an act of choosing to ignore the intended meaning,and giving what amounts to window dressings a full life as fleshed out characters in fan content and in small instances of the show; an interpretation separate from the writers original intent. 

Now the question is does someone need to actively defy the author to participate in The Death There-of? No. I don’t believe so.  In much the same fashion no one need actually be a clan member to inadvertently say or do something that's passive aggressively racist(yes a bit of an extreme, I know) one need not actively defy the author, merely ascribe to an alternate interpretation of a work of fiction. Refer to Fight Club, the film does everything it can with out directly stating “most of the people in Fight Club and later Project Mayhem are bad people, because they were already doing the things Tyler Durden was ascribing to” and almost unilaterally all the bad takes are built around this idea that they’ve achieved the perfect ideal masculine because they’re the “living in the moment, violent psychopath” nihilist the movie is actively condemning. 

The simple fact is that death of the author ultimately, in a grand scale amounts to this; did a writers intent show through hard enough for their intent to be heard? And Subjectively, how much does a person believe in the meaning that they, or the writer themself have imparted into the story? 

[allie1804-fan]

Please Assist Me (Chapter 3)

Chapter 1 Chapter 2

He said

Not long after that conversation with Alex, it was the party for my mom. Karina had insisted that Sophia and the kids come given the work she’d put into planning it and it was an informal affair with other kids coming and some entertainment laid on for them in the hotel gardens. After the meal, I caught up with Sophia as she needed to go through some travel requirements with me. Once that was sorted out, the conversation turned to some books she’d ordered for me and how I was getting on with them.

“So how’s the Dostoevsky?” she asked

“Oh I’m not onto that yet, I’ve read it before but I lost my copy. I thought I’d take it on the trip – something to pass the hours in the lounge and on the plane”

“Would you recommend it? I’ve not read any of his before”

“Oh yeah, it’s amazing, the characters are so real – it’s kind of dense, you know, but worth the effort. What do you like to read?”

“Oh well, I don’t read enough. It’s hard to find time with the kids  - Javier really didn’t like me reading either”

“What! Why?”

“Oh because once I start I can’t stop! You know if we were on holiday and I took a book, I’d just be, poor company I guess and he doesn’t read – not fiction anyway so, I guess it was one of the many things we didn’t agree on!”

“Well that’s his loss! So you never said, what you like I mean”

“Oh, classics I guess like Jane Austen and Hardy. And some new stuff – you know, thrillers like “Gone Girl” and I did just read a new book, the sequel to The Handmaid’s Tale, “The Testaments”

“Oh right, good?”

“yeah really good – just as disturbing as the first but also a gripping tale, almost an adventure really, you know wondering what will become of each character you follow”

We carried on talking books and screen adaptations. It was really the first time we’d talked about something other than her work tasks and I enjoyed it. It got my thoughts drifting back to what Alex had said.

The trip I was going on was in New York for 4 days -  it was a casting trip where I’d be meeting up with Anja, a casting director to finalise a few roles for a future  project.

We had fun and the casting was successful. I enjoyed Anja’s company and I noticed that she was being a little flirty. There was  no time for more than an informal bite in New York but she grasped the bull by the horns and suggested we go out when we got back to LA.

I agreed – I guess I was trying to shake off Alex’s words and thought that maybe a relationship with her would be more appropriate than starting something with Sophia  -  after-all, I didn’t even know if there was a chance Sophia could like me in that way.

I couldn’t think where to go for our bite so ended up suggesting that we have a low key meal at my place. I texted Sophia, asking for  help again with the prep though I can’t deny feeling a certain awkwardness about doing that after what Alex had said about my possible feelings for her.

After the casting trip, I arrived back home from New York  in the early hours of Friday, earlier than I’d planned and headed straight for bed. I’d hopefully be able to thank Sophia later when she came over with the groceries that I needed for the meal the next day.

 She Said

I remember when things started to get complicated in my heart. We’d had such a nice chat about books at his mum’s party and he’d given me a hug to thank me for my efforts on his behalf with sorting all the arrangements. By now, I definitely felt like he was a friend as well as my boss.

Shortly after the party, Keanu went to New York to do some casting sessions. I got a text from him the day before his planned return asking for some help with another dinner. He didn’t say who was coming which led me to believe it must be a woman. For the other meals I had helped him with he’d always made a point to say who the guests were (how many, their names etc) Maybe it was the casting lady from the trip – he’d said she was also based in LA.

My feelings were unnameable  - at least I didn’t want to name them as they made me ashamed. There was a mix of the protective in there but also jealousy for sure. I scolded myself for my crazy feelings.

It only got worse when I went to the house to make sure everything was fine there, feed the fish etc. There were some clothes on a clothes airer in the kitchen that I’d thrown in the washer for him after he left. I folded them and headed to his room, opening the door without a care only to find the room in semi darkness and Keanu lying asleep on the bed. He was on his back and I was fairly sure he was naked. The sheets barely covered his modesty and I almost dropped the laundry at the sight. I turned on my heal quick as a flash to get away in case I’d disturbed him enough to wake him.

I felt hot  - my thoughts flitting between wondering why he was home already and marvelling at his  lovely body.

I headed back to the kitchen with the laundry pile and distracted myself by making a start on the food prep for his meal tomorrow. About an hour later a sleepy Keanu emerged, surprised to see me standing chopping onions at the island

“Sophia, I thought you were coming later. Everything OK?”

“Yeah, all fine” I reassured him “I just couldn’t get a sitter for the kids after school and I thought it would be better to get this done on my own, without the rug rats causing mayhem”

“Oh sure. I came home earlier ……….” He stated

“Yes I know”  I replied a blush rising in my cheeks” and I couldn’t help but glance in the direction of the laundry pile

“There’s some laundry there for you  - I didn’t want to …… disturb you by bringing it in”

I could see the flush of embarrassment rising up his neck and above his beard

“I took you by surprise didn’t I?”

“Just a bit” I chuckled and the mood relaxed a little

“Sorry” he said rubbing his chin, still blushing.

“No problem. Anyway, I’m all done now so I’ll leave you in peace. Hope your dinner goes well”

“Sure, thanks Sophia, I really appreciate it”

 He Said

My dinner date with Anja went really well. She loved the food and we had a lot in common  - some of our friendship and professional circles overlapped so the conversation never ran dry. There were still parts to cast for the project so I knew we’d continue to see each other, so there was time for things to develop. I actually got the distinct impression that she wouldn’t have minded if I’d made a move on her then but that wasn’t my style anymore on a first date. I’d got more cautious in my old age  - at  least that’s what I told myself. In retrospect, I wonder if something else was holding me back. It wasn’t like I didn’t want to get laid but as she left to get her Uber, I just went for the kiss on the cheek and we said we should arrange something else soon - probably after our next casting session in a week or so.

It was the Autumn of 2019 and things were quieter for me workwise though I started to go to the gym regularly knowing the Matrix 4 was around the corner.  I didn’t need Sophia so much for household tasks but there was still some travel and for once I started to think about Christmas quite early rather than making a last minute dash to Neiman Marcus on Christmas Eve!  

Sophia was once again in her element choosing gifts for my mom and sisters. She’d also built a friendship with Karina after the party for Mom so she was able to check out her ideas for Kim and Mom with her.

Things had moved along with me and Anja too - we’d had 3 or 4 dates and for the next one, I had invited her to mine again for a dinner. Once again I roped in Sophia to help me with shopping, prep and baking a pudding. She was going to bake me her fabulous brownies which I’d tried when she left me one as a little treat one day. It was in a cute little container with a post it on it saying “eat me!”

I’d returned the favour but not with food, leaving her my recently re-read copy of “The Brothers Karamazov” on the kitchen counter with a post-it saying “read me!”

Anyway, after tasting her heavenly brownie I knew it would be perfect for the meal I had planned. and she baked it at my house so it would be super-fresh, leaving the kitchen smelling enticing.

I served a simple steak for our meal with asparagus and baked Portobello mushrooms.  Anja was full of praise for the main and thrilled with the brownie,  closing her eyes and making yummy noises that made my groin contract and my pants tighten.

“For that you have Sophia to thank, not me!” I admitted.  

“Your PA bakes for you?”

I chuckled

“Yes she is quite the multi-tasker! I basically defined the role myself so it covers many of the standard PA things and a few unique extras”

“Like what?” Anja enquired, a quizzical look on her face

As I described the things she did, Anja started laughing

“So basically, you designed the job of a 50s wife without the complication of a relationship?”

I blushed bright red at that, especially as exactly that thought had crossed my mind when I decided I needed a PA”

I held my hand up

“You caught me! Anyway, put it this way, she’s made my daily life a whole lot easier”

“Well thank her from me for the delicious brownie”

“I’ll be sure to - so shall we go through to the living room to digest?”

Anja gladly accepted and I was thrilled to be changing the subject from my 50s wife/ PA! We took our wine through and settled on the sofa, deciding to listen to some music. I invited Anja to look through my vinyl collection and pick something. She was about 10 years my junior so we hadn’t grown up with the same music -  I had to describe various bands to help her pick something. It wasn’t exactly the right atmosphere for the Pixies or Ramones! She picked the Doors which was very chill - we snuggled up and I nestled my face into her hair. Slowly she tilted her neck to the side, an unspoken invitation to nibble her neck which I gladly did and soon we were kissing. We’d kissed before but this time I could feel that it was leading somewhere which was only confirmed when Anja shifted to straddle me. I grasped her ass and pulled her closer, whispering in her ear that maybe we should move things to the bedroom.

Once in the bedroom, Anja and I made short work of removing our clothes and were very soon having sex, I say that very specifically as it wasn’t making love, at least not for me. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed it and she said she did too but I’ve never felt so disconnected or remote whilst having sex. Anja is beautiful too and a nice person but some level of spark was definitely lacking. I could feel myself looking ahead to my new year schedule and using the excuse of being away to put a lid on things. That made me feel shitty and ashamed.

 She Said

Through November, my role continued as usual as did my regular contact with my boss  as we checked off the Christmas gifts and I supported him in keeping his home running smoothly. By then, he was dating his casting agent Anja which I knew from the gossip rags as well as direct from the horse’s mouth as he’d got me to bake him my brownie for a dinner he’d had at home with her.

I wasn’t sure what to make of it really – I couldn’t put my finger on it but something seemed a bit off Maybe it was the way he talked about her or more how he didn’t. You could always tell when he was passionate about something, whether it was a book, a meal, a project and so I assumed that would carry over to people  - it did with his family. Maybe he was just being guarded but, as I said, we were on very friendly terms by then so I did wonder how into her he really was.

It turned out that Karina suspected the same. We’d met up for a coffee to look at gift ideas for their mother when she brought it up.

“So what do you think’s going on with Ke and this Anja woman?”

“What?!” I spluttered, surprised that she was gossiping with me about her big brother.

“Oh you must know, you know everything” she smirked

“I do not!” I protested.

“I bet you know if she’s slept over”

I blushed as she was right. I did know. I’d seen the tell tale signs after I’d made the brownie for them  - I had spotted a couple of her things left in his bathroom when putting fresh toiletries in his vanity unit in the bathroom.

I swallowed and told her what I knew.

“Let’s just say that I loaned him the book “Normal People” a few weeks back  - and I don’t think he needs a book right now for satisfaction if you know what I mean!”

She nodded, grinning.

“Do you think it’s serious”

“Come on! I can’t say, I know I’ve worked for him for almost a year now but we don’t talk about that kind of stuff and I don’t know him well enough to judge”

“Oh, I think you do, if he was in love, you’d know”

“I don’t know about that!” I blushed secretly knowing she was probably right. I could read him pretty well by now.

“Well I do, I’ve seen you together, you know him now. I mean what was the first personal thing you did for him?”

“Buy Kim that coffee set, I guess”

“Yes, and when he talked about Kim, you knew right away, didn’t you?, how very much he loves her and how important it was because he talked about her with passion. I remember you telling me that and how he briefed you for my tagine and Mom’s party.

“Yeah, yes I guess you have a point”

“And how does he talk about her?”

“Like….” I pondered a few seconds “like a colleague” I admitted.

“Exactly, he’s just getting laid if you ask me and it won’t last come the new year when he’s off to San Fran”

I shrugged. It wasn’t my affair to worry about.

“Well they’re grown-ups aren’t they – hopefully neither of them will get hurt” I said glad to close the topic. I felt like I was talking out of turn even though it was with his sister.

@fortheloveoffanfic @kindainlovewithkeanu @omg-imagine @iworshipkeanureeves @fics-not-tragedies @ficsnroses @keanureevesisbae @penwieldingdreamer @witty-wallflower @paperplanesandwallflowers @bitchyslut99 @ladyreapermc @toomanystoriessolittletime @fanficsrusz @keanuficfiles

[dippedanddripped]

Founded on the streets of Flatbush, Brooklyn, in the '90s, Carl Williams founded his iconic brand with "$1000 and a dream". Born in an era where your outfit was social currency, Karl used his passion for style to develop the influential brand we now know and love as Karl Kani. A self-taught designer, Karl's designs have been worn by icons such as Tupac, Nas, Jay-Z, Aaliyah, and Snoop. Building his own baggy-fit, hip-hop ready blueprint, Karl used his "hustle-hard" upbringing and a savvy eye for street-influenced fashion to create a globally-renowned brand.

Coming for an era where nobody believed hip-hop culture could become pop-culture de rigueur, Karl faced skeptical detractors, unsure if a street-influenced label could go global. Despite being confident, Karl would always ask himself "Can I do it?" This existential question was the launching pad that drove Karl to legally change his name from Carl Williams to Karl Kani. So, the question of "Can I?" morphed into the brand name "Kani", and with that, a legendary label was born.

Fast forward to the global pandemic of 2020 - in a time of uncertainty, many creatives are asking themselves: "Can I keep my business going," "Can I still perform," and "Can I stay fit and healthy?"

Looking to Karl's story for inspiration, an overarching message prevails - together "we can" do this.

In this candid video, Karl touches on his storied journey, from getting up at 5:30 am to sell newspapers so he could buy clothes, to gaining inspiration seeing his father visit tailors as a child. Ever the optimist, Karl touches on how he overcomes setbacks, remains grounded and healthy, and how we can grow as a community.

Volume 90%

As our community of creative talent grows stronger and stronger, we look to a diverse range of talents who provide individual stories of creative fortitude. With the effects of Covid-19 taking a toll on the industry, this inspiring set of creatives prove that an "I Can" attitude can overcome any obstacle. From rappers to visual artists, their stories provide hope during tough times.

KOBY MARTIN – ARTIST

A proud export of Ghana, London-based artist Koby Martin uses traditional and digital mediums to illustrate his work. His emotive style fuses Ghanian and British influences, articulating his life experiences through personal struggles and tragedies, turning them into artistic triumph.

With collaborations with the British Council, and The British High Commission - for which he was commissioned to create a live painting for 2019's Afrochella concert at the El Wak Stadium in Accra, Ghana. Koby's artwork spans over a variety of subjects, often using bright colors - a reflection of his heritage and spontaneous personality.

How has the current climate impacted your art and the way you create?

The current climate has me in a very reflective mood - in regards to how I use my time - whether spending time with family, friends, and even working. It’s also made me aware of how fragile & short life really is. Creatively, I always work in isolation, so it was quite hard to differentiate the climate from my normal routine. But, it also pushed me to experiment with other materials and learn new techniques. I also started reading more, which I rarely do, because of my short attention span. Although we have had a lot of tragedies and losses, I personally believe it's made me stronger, tougher, and smarter for any challenge ahead!

How can I make a change?

Change comes about through self-belief and the realization of who we are as individuals. It's a domino effect that begins with the man/woman in the mirror. I set out to express that through my gift of creating, collaborating, and having yearly exhibitions, which I believe brought together a sense of awareness, togetherness, restoration, and healing, especially within the black community.

How can I inspire others?

Inspiration starts with self and comes from within. To inspire, one has to believe in self and take action on the standards and goals they have set out for themselves. In doing that, it sparks a viral sense of awareness, belief, and motivation with the people you are around.

How can I create in the current climate?

The current climate has taught me to be still. I have learned to put everything at a standstill when it's time to create, a momentary pause from all the stresses of life. This allows me to get lost in my work. I step into a different world, a whole new dimension that allows me to create with joy. Something like stepping out of the business of a matrix and skip-hopping into a Teletubby world is the best way I can explain it.

TORI TAIWO – PHOTOGRAPHER

Photographer Tori Taiwo runs Hercuts, an empowering haircut page for women who have embraced shaving their hair, favoring unique and charismatic low-cut hairstyles. After leaving home and falling out with a family friend, 33-year-old Taiwo was given a place in a hostel. Too terrified to stay there, Taiwo was determined to change her life. She continues to empower, inform, and inspire others via her art.

How has the current climate impacted your art and the way you create?

The current climate has allowed me to explore and revisit my prior passions. During the first lockdown, I started shooting products, this allowed me to gain new skills and open a new revenue. I have started booking clients, and shooting and filming products, which I can do from home. How can I make a change? By being open to trying new things and willing to allow for changes that are unforeseen, as well as collaborating with other creatives to keep morale up and encourage others to try new things too!

How can I inspire others?

By sharing the process of pivoting and exploration - high, lows, and everything in between.

How can I create in the current climate?

By changing my outlook on the creative process - stripping back and using what I have at my disposal to create; trying new things & exploring.

STEFANI NURDING – SKATER/ ENTREPRENEUR<

As the founder of skateboard brand Salon Skateboards, Stefani Nurding hopes to destroy the "boys only" stereotype that plagues the skate scene. A skater who was once told she was "too pretty to skate", Stefani is passionate about promoting diversity within the skate community. With a respected brand, Stefani juggles being a mum and pro-skater in a male-dominated industry.

How has the current climate impacted your art and the way you create?

Before the lockdown, I would say that it really made me think about being disconnected from people. I felt much more like I wanted to film and photograph others skating, as opposed to focusing on myself. One of my projects was to shoot instant photos of friends or strangers skating, then give them the photo afterward. Now that we're in lockdown, I feel even more disconnected from people, so I try to make my content fun and positive to try and uplift people.

How can I make a change?

I realized that I have a lot of knowledge about how to make money as a self-employed person. My friends were losing their jobs around me, and I became aware that some of them had no idea how to make money other than having a job. I coached a few friends that needed help, and I also set up affordable online courses about time management and setting up your own business.

How can I inspire others?

After I had my baby, I felt so lost with skateboarding and my own identity. It felt like I didn't know what I liked anymore and had no idea if my body would return to my previous level of fitness after my cesarean. Fast forward 20 months, I am in peak health, doing pilates regularly and skateboarding 2-3 times a week. I am 32 and a new mum. I just really hope that others who see 30 as old, or think they can't do things after becoming a mother will just maybe think "screw it, she is doing it and so can I".

How can I create in the current climate?

I have my skate brand Salon Skateboards as a creative outlet for my graphic design which is nice, but I love to create sporadically and get ideas all the time which I need another outlet for. I have been creating a lot of different things - painting, experimenting with Photoshop, photography, printing clothes, and just generally having fun with making art. There are a lot of things where I just think "meh, will never use it", but occasionally I come out with a gem.

ROXXXAN – ACTIVIST/RAPPER/MODEL

Birmingham-raised rapper Roxxan represents the LGBTQ community with enormous pride. For the last ten years, the queer rapper has built up her own unique identity. A self-proclaimed tomboy, Roxxxan has expressed her want to create a space for women who adhere to non-gender specific traits. After relocating to London, Roxxx has displayed perseverance and determination - from coming to London to get a job at a major label to then being signed as an artist eight months later.

How has the current climate impacted your art and the way you create?

The current climate has affected the energy around me and where I go for inspiration. Before lockdown, I would meet friends, be around family, different energies, and walks of life, which made it easy to be inspired or do things that spark creativity. Now I go for walks or sit on a park bench so I can soak up all around me, then process it and let it out my way.

How can I make a change?

I can make a change by being visibly patient and open to change and growth. I aim to make a change by also being present for any women POC or fellow LGBTQA's. A lot of people are finding it hard to cope, I can make a change by being there for any and all of my people.

How can I inspire others?

I try to inspire others by living in my truth and fully accepting who I am; using my differences or things that have held me back in the past as my gifts to the world. I understand times are a lot different now, but had some of the artists and people I looked up to like Missy Elliot and Queen Latifa been open about their sexuality, I believe I would have found mine a lot sooner. Which also would lead to me finding myself sooner. I aim to be that for younger people growing up.

How can I create in the current climate?

In the current climate, I create at home with my iPad studio. Through spring and summer, I sat with and felt all the highs and lows of 2020. It’s only recently that I’ve finished processing, and now I’m ready to put everything into words and my outlet and art.

SILAI ESTATIRA – SPOKEN WORD ARTIST

Silai Estatira aka Mishaal Javed is a young British hip-hop artist, spoken-word poet, micro-influencer, and full-time international relations student. A brave artist, Mishaal has gone against the grain of what is expected from her culturally by venturing into rap, spitting socio-political raps with a unique and fresh take on streetwear style.

How has the current climate impacted your art and the way you create?

During lockdown, music almost became a lifeline. It has always felt like my purpose, but I realized how much I needed it. I’ve been writing more, going back to the basics of it, sometimes just freestyling in my room or with my best friend and having fun with it again. I’ve been revisiting some of my favorite projects too. Retracing the steps of artists I admire, just taking it all in.

How can I make a change?

I want to fight for the world to be more inclusive. To be a space for everyone, not just a representation of some voices. Fighting for all diaspora, the people who are othered, and everyone who doesn’t feel represented. Music can make a big change. I want my music to comfort people, and to give company, the same way it does for me.

How can I inspire others?

I want to let people know it’s okay to ride their own wave, step outside the box, and live outside it. It’s okay to venture into spaces you’ve never ventured into before, especially when people tell you that you can’t do it. Never stop. Keep perfecting your art. It belongs to you, it is yours. Everyone has a destiny, we can’t let anyone - including ourselves - stop us from chasing it.

As Muslim women, people talk over us (metaphorically). Everyone has an opinion, and there’s so much dehumanization and categorizing that happens. I know girls that have had to fight that. I still fight it. But we’re still here, going. For us, It’s a movement.

How can I create in the current climate?

Because there have been no gigs, I’ve had so much time to write and experiment with sounds. I’m lucky because I’ve always recorded in my room so I’ve just been continuing that. I’ve had more time to think about how to present and reflect on my pieces too. There are so many ways to create, it’s just about being present with yourself, and knowing what story you’re trying to tell.

KANAH FLEX – DANCER / MOVEMENT ARTIST

Born-and-raised in south London born, self-taught dancer and movement artist Kanah Flex was discovered busking by FKA twigs in 2014. The autistic dancer struggled to express himself, before finding his calling in the world of dance. A free spirit with a dedicated following on social media, the father of two challenges society’s ideas of normality, pushing his followers to achieve their goals.

How has the current climate impacted your art and the way you create?

I feel as if climate change has forced me to exercise all of the other gifts that I have shunned in the past, due to sheer laziness or the comfort of being inside the box. I feel like even though my physical might be on lockdown, my spirit is free.

How can I make a change?

The only change I am going to start with is myself, it’s impossible to change anything before that  - I must start with me. Self-discipline is very key to change.

How can I inspire others?

By staying true to myself, my family, and my people

How can I create in the current climate?

I make things work with what I have and what I am surrounded by. I cannot play the victim in these times, even though the climate has changed, my creativity hasn’t. I’m always thinking of innovative ideas.

[tgsblogs]

Contending for the Original Apostolic, Nazarene Faith

“You are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a peculiar [purchased] people; that you should show forth the praises [the virtues] of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light”

(1 Peter 2:9). How are you doing fulfilling this call? Read through our Navigating Today’s Turbulence blog and discover the merits and challenging expectations of biblical discipleship, and embark afresh toward your destiny. We are here to serve. You have been set apart by Yahweh your Elohim and appointed to pull down demonic strongholds and the evil works of darkness that beset so many in the land, but also to restore the truth once delivered to the saints and contend for the societal recovery of your nation; i.e., to love your neighbor. Are you ready to be fully prepared for this demanding, prophetic work? If so, let’s take a year and get your equipping done! You are needed!

Keep in mind, there are powerful, destructive forces at work today that advocate “extraordinary changes in virtually every aspect of American life. The changes will be designed to centralize power in Washington bureaucracies, increase the influence of public employee unions, favor criminals over police, impose radical societal values, and submerge America in globalism and multi-lateralism [corrosive global alliances].” [1] Such changes--and there are many poised--would be disastrous to our domestic and personal lives, overriding constitutional liberties and values--including the freedom of religion, and undermining traditional marriage and family standards, and so on--while supporting socialism, abortion, pedophilia, anti-biblical humanist values, new age spirituality, and other corrupt impositions. This can’t be tolerated by patriots of the Kingdom! The Spirit-empowered Body of Messiah is the only corporate entity on the planet divinely enabled to resist and overcome the demonic spiritual component underlying and perpetuating the prevailing lawlessness and its lewd evil works. Therefore, become equipped for your duties, my friends. And pray without ceasing, and VOTE! It is our privilege and duty. [1. Trump and the American Future; p.8, N. Gingrich]

So. Hello visitors, and all you blessed people of faith who trust in Yeshua and therefore face the future confidently. I am sure you are among those visionary reformers today who look for an all-important, great moral and spiritual awakening for America and a needful recovery of law-and-order in our culture. This is a great hope we envision and, with Yahweh’s help, it’s within our reach. Welcome to Navigating Today’s Turbulence Introduction, Blog 1. This program is a reformation, prophetic outreach of the Torah and Glory School. It has been raised up in this hour as a means of earnestly contending for three vital things--(first) for the Ecclesia’s indispensable, spirit and truth restoration--that is, we are dealing with the saints recovery of the original apostolic, Hebraic, biblical faith that was once for all time entrusted to the saints; (secondly) we contend for an enduring multi-generational revival also--a blessed hope that a return to divine truth makes possible, and (thirdly) Navigating Today’s Turbulence strives to equip many disciples for Messiah Yeshua. The three goals I just mentioned are mutually supportive and inter-related, and have a place in your life. To help effectuate our hope and enlighten subscribers with this podcast/blog, we contrast social commentary with appropriate Torah-based Scripture instruction. By placing current events side by side with biblical truth we can analyze social conditions, provide relevant scriptural responses, and reveal YHVH’s principles for navigating the turbulence and correcting its associated problems. Thus, the format provides profitable knowledge and life-insights that will encourage and empower subscribers and listeners to confront and overcome the intensifying personal and domestic challenges we all will face in the time just ahead. What’s coming will be an era of emerging trans-humanism, microchip enforcement, government surveillance, AI technocracy, and considerably more.

The emerging epoch will be much different and more challenging than this era we currently inhabit. Look how quickly and easily our culture has been persuaded, subdued, and changed--just recently, over the Covid 19 panic the government and the main-stream-media have conspired to accentuate and sustain. Already, multitudes have eagerly embraced their (a) questionable, mixed reporting, (b) plural mis-diagnoses, (c) unproven medical assertions, and the (d) mandated but very often ineffectual, over-utilized, preventive measures--which now include mask-wearers snitching on neighbors. Imagine that! Spies lurk among us! Flu and Covid 19 viruses are similar, but have some differences and both can be dangerous, we are told, especially for people weakened with pre-existing negative health conditions. Those afflicted must be cared for and protected. But in our opinion this Covid strain, while posing a threat, does not merit excessive government interventions and society shut-downs, particularly since these are proving to be harmful in some cases, and not necessarily effective in others. I am not speaking of masking alone, but also of social distancing, lock-downs, surveillance, arbitrary sequestering, shopping regulations, even arrests, and curfews. Think tyranny. Anyway, we are told that older people with weak immune systems or compromised health conditions, especially if suffering with respiratory problems, are at a higher risk from serious Covid infection than other groups. We sincerely want them and others protected, but wonder why the use of hydroxychloroquine, a common medicine which many reports endorse, is being restricted. In any case, the tactics of government--state or local, have expanded to comprise a prevention effort that is controlling and abusive. Ask yourself: How long will this be allowed to continue? Is a militant civil response, a heavy-handed strategic pattern of social censorship, subtly being established to combat Covid? Is our country’s society going to be operating on a start-stop-start-stop basis whenever people cough or wheeze, or someone is diagnosed with a disease? Shall we all run back to hide behind closed doors, full face masks, and heaven knows what else, when a flu or some other illness rises again? After all, some sicknesses can be seasonal, you know. We have been warned in the Scriptures: “Be not deceived…” Do we listen? Do we evaluate before lamely submitting to some new narrative? Apparently not much. So now, with “new normal” impositions and anxieties pretty much in place, (a) re-establishing our once un-stifled freedom, and (b) getting back the “old normal” will require (1) real strength of character with (2) unflinching resolve, supported by (3) a true motivational prophetic vision for a renewed America--three attributes needed by today’s restoration patriots--including you and me. Governments have their purpose, but these always growing, enormous entities must be constantly overseen by the public they serve, and restricted from authoritative overreach.

Let’s face it, starting small, they become ravenous, monolithic beasts ever hungry for control, and whose internal agencies are well known for using deception for social, political, and economic advantage. For instance, do you recall in the past having been told time and again by federal and state authorities, medical experts and corporations, and the media, that various illnesses and disasters were going to sweep across the country with devastating results? I do. The frightening claims included such plagues and troubles as Anthrax, West Nile Flu, Sars, Bird Flu, E-coli, HIV, Y2K, H1M1, and the Swine Flu! Now it’s climate-change and the Corona Virus. Think Chicken Little. Though we should take such threats seriously when necessary, let us be sure of this first--the most incapacitating, contagious plague is debilitating fear--i.e., panic. It’s here, now. But Scripture assures us: “God hath dealt to every man [person] the measure of faith” (Rom. 12:3). This means we can reject fear--an enemy and thief, and instead trust Yeshua’s words and assurances. But true, uncompromising biblical faith and practice has almost vanished from modern America. The country’s cultural demise is the result of generational lawlessness--compounded disobedience to Yahweh’ biblical instructions by Americans at all levels, decade by decade--thus giving ample space for spiritual deception and proliferating corruption. Westernized, institutional Christianity, for the most part, is now spiritually moribund [listless] and not able to fulfill Yeshua’s mandate, contend with infernal enemies effectively, or fully enlighten and preserve society. It is a vast matrix of mostly old wine-skins unable to (a) produce the spiritual salt-and-light needed to sustain renewal, (b) enforce biblical values and ethics, or (c) fulfill Yeshua’s Great Commission of making disciples who obey His teachings. New wine-skins--filled with the new wine of recovered Torah-based truth and practice--which is Spirit-powered, Yeshua-centered, sanctified faith--are needed and will happily fulfill His commands. These autonomous new wine-skins must come forth. America needs to be turned right side up, beginning with a remnant that has returned to Yahweh’s unmixed, apostolic faith. Think Reformation. It is obvious--both the religious and secular segments of the nation have failed to honor Yahweh and His Word. Our country needs to repent. Almost all of us, directly or indirectly, have had a hand in its moral and spiritual decline. Apostate multitudes have been given over to depraved minds and reprobate thinking. See Romans One! This wretched condition, actually a curse, has left many people subjected to and influenced by an infernal spell cast over the back-slidden nation. An “other-worldly” demonic force is behind the senselessness, anarchy, savagery, multiple abominations, and general anarchy that abound and multiply in this hour. It thrives in the murky, corrosive atmosphere of sin and unbelief. Scripture declares: “Righteousness exalts a nation but sin is a reproach to any people” (Prov. 13:24). Righteousness is blessed. Unrighteousness--lawlessness, is not! We have but one option, I think, and that is to return to His Kingdom and truth--our foundation for life and warfare. Compromise does not work. Truth must be diligently and repeatedly proclaimed to face down the invasive demonic falsehoods and mistruths that persuade and manipulate multitudes, and also energize and proliferate lawlessness and social chaos. Believers are awakening, though, to Yeshua’s prophetic restoration purposes, and they are eagerly aspiring to be involved, to resist spiritual wickedness, and to support His righteous beneficial cause. Growing numbers of Spirit-born believers are ambitious to be among Messiah’s over-comers of the world’s dark forces, for instance--could this be you? And they are also aspiring to serve as the pro-claimers of the Kingdom of God, supported by the Spirit’s full ministry--is this you? Perhaps you envision being elevated as a Spirit-empowered guardian of our restored constitutional liberty--will you be spiritually equipped to become one? And others are preparing to be established as Spirit-led and anointed leaders for the spiritual, moral, and even economic, cultural reconstruction we hope will occur on the other side of the 2020 election--are you among these heroes? Or are you simply aspiring to be a genuine disciple of Yeshua, an ambassador of His kingdom? This holy privilege is our highest calling and duty. Or do you, noble servant, aspire to become all of the above? If so, go for it!

For such service, today’s revival-oriented, visionary believers are being summoned to prepare by first relocating back to Yahweh’s foundation of unadulterated Torah-based truth and the Holy Spirit’s power and fire. And hearing His call, committed saints are throwing down their nets, as did John and James, and responding without boldly. They intend to be properly Word-equipped and Spirit-empowered as Yeshua’s disciples, and thereby victorious over the formidable heavyweight challenges ahead. The commitment will prove highly beneficial, life-changing, uplifting, and exciting for all of us! Yeshua-centered, Spirit-charged, Torah-based, sanctified saints will form the visionary core needed (a) to keep an awakening spiritually heated and (b) to sustain the multi-generational recovery we envision and need. Will you be among them? Yes, I think you will! And I want to help you.

My name is Hutch Church. I am the founder of Torah and Glory School (TGS) and Navigating Today’s Turbulence (NTT). Thank you for listening. Let’s continue, but before going forward, buckle up. The “Turbulence Ahead” sign is lit and blinking. More bumps may be ahead. Torah-based truth is coming. So, let’s go forward eagerly, ready to recover the original apostolic faith and Yahweh’s blessing. We are heading toward an uplifting, trans-formative encounter with Yahweh’s Holy Spirit and His Word, and the beneficial results of our upward faith journey will be life changing for us and others. But--there are important, existential issues before us that present challenges, and to biblicly deal with them will require bold responses from reformers--such as making necessary adjustments, or corrections, to our traditional, denominational Christian education and prophetic worldview. We will address Yeshua’s discipleship requirements further, from a Full-Gospel, Torah-rooted perspective, during the course of our comments. But these following 6 issues provide (a) a needed backdrop, and reveal (b) the purpose for our journey back to the ancient pathways--to our Father’s house and His instructions. The six we will address are:

(1) America’s current unstable condition,

(2) the widespread root problem of lawlessness,

(3) why rebellion and lawbreaking proliferate,

(4) the manifold dire consequences of lawlessness that we are unhappily enduring for the moment,

(5) the problem’s solution--including its importance in bringing believers back to uncompromising Torah-based biblical truth, and finally

(6) the moral and spiritual restoration of America, its possibility, and its connection to the biblical, grass roots, Return-to-Truth movements.

Be sure of this. The renewal of our lives and our society is established and continued by (1) the restoration of Yahweh’s truth, standards, and values and (2) an honest, deep individual repentance of sin and falsehood. Therefore, we are directed to the spiritual component underlying these existential issues, a real force that must be discerned and addressed and overcome. We saints can do this by the Spirit’s leadership and power. Therefore, I am among those saints who recognize the need and contend for a much-needed Holy Spirit charged, Word-based, Truth Revival for today’s institutional Christianity--particularly for the Body of Messiah in America. To help gain this goal, NTT implements TGS’s five-volume Discipleship Course. These upcoming excellent Torah-rooted lessons are parsha based, and each one is preceded by and is related to a current-events commentary. The format works effectively to reveal the connection between (a) learning and honoring YHVH’s truth with (b) overcoming personal and social turbulence, and (c) establishing cultural renewal. Thus, Navigating Today’s Turbulence promotes recovering the Hebraic-Israelite oriented ministry that emulates and teaches the pristine, Nazarene faith of the early apostolic assembly of Yeshua’s called-out Judaic followers. This original Pentecostal faith of the apostles has been under demonic assault from the beginning, we know. Notwithstanding, it’s being recovered, and it remains the uncompromised, resolute, implacable means for effectively navigating and overcoming today’s upheavals and tomorrow’s turbulence, individually and domestically! Also, such devotion to His truth better allows for unhindered friendship-fellowship with Yeshua, our Shepherd. The original Nazarene Israelite faith is the untainted salvation faith once-for-all time delivered to the early Sabbath-guarding saints--the holy faith system composed of the beliefs and traditions that our Creator has established and endorsed by the Scriptures. Therefore, Navigating Today’s Turbulence and the TGS resources honor (a) Yahweh Elohim--the Father, (b) Yeshua Ha Maschiach (Jesus, the Messiah)--His divine Son, (c) the full ministry of the Holy Spirit, and (d) Torah-based, Sabbath-honoring truth. This faith encompasses and is wholly compatible with the entirety of the Holy Scriptures--both the Old and the New Testaments which are inspired by the Spirit of YHVH--with nothing added to them or taken away from them. The Bible is one undivided book. And yes, we have been saved by grace through faith in Messiah Yahshua of Judah and of the House of David. No one is saved by works alone. Trust Yeshua. Every saint should know this. So, being persuaded by the Holy Spirit, we of NTT choose (1) to express our faith in the apostolic Hebraic manner entrusted to us by Scripture, (2) to promote and keep YHVH’s Sabbath, and Moedim, and (3) to follow our Redeemer's holy instructions, as opposed to traditional postmodern, unplumbed, mixed religious dogma. It is written: “...contend for the faith…” (Jude 1:3). We should do what the Spirit saith. This is our life, and the central purpose of TGS’s Navigating Today’s Turbulence. 

Perhaps a statement is in order clarifying some faith positions of Navigating Today’s Turbulence. Our tenets will be posted on our new Torah and Glory School website. We declare--all Yeshua’s words, ways, and commandments are compatible with and supportive of the Torah. There is not a contradiction to be found between them. Yahweh’s Law--His holy instructions--has not been abolished, though portions have been suspended. Therefore, Navigating Today’s Turbulence encourages students to walk out their salvation faith in accordance with Kingdom of God standards and His righteousness, which is lawfulness--all of it that is known and applicable and doable. Keeping Yeshua’s commandments is a holy duty, an expectation of disciples, and a joy as well. It gives a heightened and more meaningful purpose to life and faith, and glorifies our soon-coming King. That is what we want!

Therefore, expressing our faith according to its uncompromising Hebraic Nazarene origins is our choice. Our desire. His will. This is not legalism. It is not working for salvation. Neither is it rigid, rule keeping religion. It is not bondage at all. Actually, it’s freedom from bondage. Nor is conformance to Messiah’s instructions coming under the Law. It is biblical discipleship--the demonstration of love for God and man He has ordained. Discipleship is a beneficial learner-teacher relationship that functions according to Yeshua’s stipulations, not ours. It is a chosen lifestyle, the best one available on earth, in my opinion. What do you think? Decide for yourself. Nevertheless, the original pure faith spoken of and defended by Jude and others, and being recovered at this prophetic time, is under assault again primarily by mainstream institutional 501c3 multivariate Christianity. Consequently, the faith once delivered must be contended for once more, by us--today. To contend means to protect and maintain. For believers it means to defend the early Nazarene Israelite faith from being distorted, impaired, or misrepresented. By distorting or incompletely teaching Yahweh’s Sacred Scriptures, these debilitative, faith-suffocating results occur: (1) true sanctification is stifled and sin is given room to revive, (2) the value of biblical righteousness is left un-emphasized, (3) the full ministry of the Ruach Ha Kodesh is quenched, (4) obedience to Yahweh’s times, sabbaths, seasons and commandments goes unlearned while worldly holidays are taught and celebrated, and (5) the prescribed equipping-of-believers for the victory in life which has been appointed to them, is denied, or withheld. All these shortcomings are occurring to a greater or lesser extent with institutional Christian systems today. Simply stated, false or incomplete, Torah-denying, Scripture teaching--such as produced by America’s institutional religious organizations, despite their good social works--stymies genuine discipleship, disregards Yeshua and most of His words, grieves the Holy Spirit, and limits the equipping and uplifting of the saints. As Jude clearly instructed--the apostolic, Hebraic, Nazarene Sabbath-honoring faith, that was at one time established and endorsed, must always be defended, guarded, and, for us today, restored and honored.

We of Navigating Today’s Turbulence contend that (1) an enduring, multi-generation revival of Spirit and Truth for the Body of Messiah and (2) a “rule of law” restoration for American culture--a national culture-wide healing--could come, endure, and actually rest upon the nation. Our part?  We forsake our evil ways, draw near to the Almighty, trample down our idols of false religion or new age beliefs, eschew worldliness, depart from habitual sin--breaking His Law, and live in conformance, as expected, to the instructions of our King of glory. This is a great way to live! Let’s believe and act with expectation for truly great things to come from our Father whose mercy endures forever, and whose love is everlasting. But (1) sinfulness, (2) callous disobedience, (3) indifference to learning and following Yeshua’s sacred Words, (4) living with compromises of faith, or other debilitating customs must have no place among us anymore. Such would make true worship impossible, would it not? It would! We are His set-apart, Spirit-empowered disciples--Messiah’s ambassadors of His Kingdom and love. Our marching orders are clear, and TGS--using Navigating Today’s Turbulence--will explain them further using our Discipleship Course. To summarize--NTT promotes a multi-generation revival for America and a Torah-rooted Word-recovery for the Body of Messiah, ushered in by invoking YHVH Elohim through individual and corporate prayer--with repentance. Truth, even when demanding, lifts people up. That is a goal of ours. A return to lawfulness is critical for the welfare of individual believers, and the whole of society as well. Allow me to be repetitive just one more time--to drive home important power points. Thank you.  The essential conditions for securing the enduring--I repeat, the enduring manifold secular and faith restoration NTT promotes and Americans need include:  (1) a full recovery of unadulterated biblical truth to the Body of Messiah, (2) a renewal of devotion for and true obedience to Yeshua, (3) a  re-establishment of the Holy Spirit’s full ministry, and (4) the equipping of sanctified disciples from converts, and (5) teaching our children in the home. This will take time--a Spirit-led transition starting from our current faith point, so to speak. There is much for us to do together in these latter days of lawlessness and idolatry, but also of recovery and reform. Finally, returning to our opening question, this comment: If we follow Yeshua (a) as He has defined discipleship in the Holy Scriptures, (b) and reposition to the “faith which was once delivered unto the saints” --we will be true Hebraic oriented, Israelite disciples, learners of Yeshua. And as such, we will indeed be (1) distinguished--set apart for Yeshua and His Kingdom purposes, and thereby be different from other people in lifestyle and worldview, and (2) we will be militant overcomers--a real threat to evil strongholds and the kingdom of darkness, but (3) we will also be unpopular--rejected by the world system and not in agreement with its evil works, values, or patrons. So be glad. We will be recognized as Spirit-born servants obedient to the King’s words, and His highly esteemed friends. Yes, we are peculiar (1 Peter 2:9), belonging to Yeshua--purchased by His shed blood, and happy about our citizenship in His kingdom. So, let’s rejoice greatly. Our names are written in the Lamb’s Book of Life. The saints can praise Him for He has overcome the world, and we with Him. Amen! In Blog 3 we will address America’s condition, lawlessness and its dire consequences, the dilemma’s solution, and the Hebraic return-to-truth phenomenon’s importance to a deep spiritual awakening. Our best days are ahead. The Father has great things in store for us who follow His Son.

Next is Navigating Today’s Turbulence, Blog 2--featuring militancy, my bio, and spiritual warfare. See you there...

 Shalom.

[firesteck-blog]

Everything for reloading and more

First of all, a self-loaded cartridge is at least twice cheaper than the factory one, which allows you to shoot more. Secondly, it can be more accurate than the factory ones, and much more. Thirdly, cartridges for many old weapon systems are not produced or are expensive. Let us examine these reasons in more detail.

With the price, everything is clear - the sleeve is reused, and its cost in the price of the cartridge is quite significant and can be up to half the cost of the cartridge. The outfitting process is also worth something.

The increase in accuracy is due to the fact that a self-loaded cartridge can be more adapted to a given weapon model than a factory one. The distance from the bullet to the beginning of the rifling greatly affects the accuracy of the shot, it should be as small as possible, but weapon manufacturers remember that for different bullets the cylindrical part starts at a slightly different distance from the muzzle of the case, and make the bullet entrance designed for the longest bullet ... Each barrel shows the highest accuracy at certain bullet velocities, this is probably due to the peculiarities of barrel vibrations at the time of the shot. Before reloading, the shooter carefully determines the distance from the muzzle of the case to the beginning of the rifling or the total length of the cartridge. This operation is performed once for each type of bullet for a given rifle, of course, it is necessary to keep a journal.

The actual reloading consists of several operations: preparing the shells, removing the spent primer, setting a new primer, measuring the powder charge, planting the bullet in the shell, squeezing the barrel of the shell. The latter operation is not required in all calibers.

The casings are inspected, cleaned and lubricated with crumpled rejection and sorting by manufacturer, or at least the military casings (.223Rem and 308Win cartridges) must be sorted from civilian ones - the military capsules are additionally fixed and the wall thickness is larger.

They are usually cleaned by shaking them in a vibration vessel - a special device resembling a large and slow mixer with a special powder. It resembles a polishing paste in large granules. In the absence of powder and a vibrating vessel, some wash the sleeves in a solution of acetic acid, and then in pure water, and then dry. Further operations require a press, there are many types of them, the most popular in the USA are the presses of the "Dillon", "Hornady", "Lee"

First, the spent primer is removed and the case is molded, in fact, the same core of the press removes the primer and straightens the neck of the case, and the outer matrix calibrates the case from the outside, but not in length. When molding, a special non-detonating lubricant is used, that is, it does not contain gasoline components, and only brass sleeves are subject to molding - an attempt to push a steel sleeve into the forming matrix may result in a breakdown of the matrix, or at least the sleeve will have to be knocked out of it with a hammer after disassembling the press.

Both when shooting and when shaping the muzzle, the liner is slightly stretched, therefore, an operation is required to trim the muzzle along the length and chamfer it inside and out. Chamfering makes the unpatronizing force uniform when fired and increases the accuracy of fire. Many shooters cut the muzzle a little shorter, and only do this after two or three reloads, making sure that the muzzle length remains within tolerance.

This is followed by cleaning the primer hole and removing carbon deposits from it, but this is practiced only by those who want to get maximum accuracy when shooting at the greatest distance, mainly varmint enthusiasts and shooters at 600 and 1000 meters. Some shooters, using a special device, not only clean the capsule hole from carbon deposits, but also chamfer it in order to achieve maximum uniformity of ignition of the powder charge, but the need for this operation is questioned by some.

Capsule insertion - the next operation - is done using a press or a manual capsule insertion device. Not a single western shooter will fill the capsules with primers, spreading the primers on the table and pressing on them from above with the casings, as some of our hunters do when loading cartridges for smoothbore.

Capsuled sleeves are placed in a stand - a board with holes, and after the required number of sleeves is encapsulated, powder is poured into them. Gunpowder for rifle cartridges in the West are produced by many firms, and, as you might guess, different types of gunpowder are used for cartridges of different calibers, moreover, cartridges with different weights of bullets can also differ in the desired type of powder. But this is not a problem - there are many reloading guides on sale, and the necessary information is often provided on the gunpowder can. In addition, gunpowders are produced with high resistance to weather changes for those hunters who travel a lot. The best of these powders, when the ambient temperature drops by fifty degrees, change the speed of the bullet by less than 10 m / s. The powder is dosed with a volumetric dispenser with micrometric adjustment, of course, it is necessary to weigh every 20th or 30th charge to check the dispenser's operation. Fans of large calibers, and in the United States, competitions are regularly held in shooting 12.7mm rifles at distances of one and one and a half kilometers, usually weighing the powder charge of each cartridge with weights, also come those who want to equip especially accurate cartridges for competitions or especially responsible hunting. In general, volumetric dispensers are reasonably accurate for shooting practice and general hunting, especially varminting, which requires a particularly high amount of ammo. usually the powder charge of each cartridge is weighed out with scales, and those who want to equip especially accurate cartridges for competitions or especially important hunts do the same. In general, volumetric dispensers are reasonably accurate for shooting practice and general hunting, especially varminting, which requires a particularly high amount of ammo. usually the powder charge of each cartridge is weighed out with scales, and those who want to equip especially accurate cartridges for competitions or especially important hunts do the same. In general, volumetric dispensers are reasonably accurate for shooting practice and general hunting, especially varminting, which requires a particularly high amount of ammo.

And, finally, having looked from above at the board-stand with cartridges so as not to miss an empty one or filled with an increased charge, the reloading machine starts firing bullets.

Bullets for rifles and pistols in the United States are produced by several companies, in addition, there is also equipment for self-casting lead shellless bullets, especially often used in revolvers or large-caliber rifles for short-range shooting. So it is with muzzle-loading weapons, another hobby of fans of the history of weapons.

Naturally, for target shooting and for hunting, different bullets are used, the range of which is simply amazing - for example, for the .308Win caliber, Barnes alone produces more than fifty variants of bullets of different weights and designs, for any type of hunting. For target shooting, the Sierra MatchKing bullet is the most popular, the vast majority of competitions are won with cartridges with it. For army snipers, Lake City produces ready-made M118 cartridges with a MatchKing bullet. The last operation - squeezing the muzzle of the sleeve onto the bullet, is not required for all calibers, often a device for accurately placing the bullet into the sleeve at the same time squeezes the muzzle, but there may be a separate operation. A press is also used for this operation.

In addition to presses of conventional design, on which one operation can be performed, replacing the equipment when moving from removing the primers to their setting, and then to setting bullets, there are so-called progressive presses, which actually represent a rotor, as in the factory line for loading cartridges, which contains several "stations". The progressive press has a powder hopper and magazines for primers and bullets. After adjusting the gunpowder dispenser, equipping the "magazines" of the press with primers and bullets, it remains only to insert the sleeves into the first "station" and press the lever. The rotor rotates, while at the first "station" the sleeve is molded and the old capsule is removed, at the second - a new one is put in, the third is filled with gunpowder and at the fourth the bullet is inserted and crimped. In fact, every time you press the press lever with "

Reloading allows you to increase the accuracy of fire by selecting the best combination of powder mass, mass and type of bullet, for which the owner of the weapon usually equips two dozen or more cartridges with different weights of powder, and then at the shooting range in good weather, shooting from a stable position determines the best combination.

I understand that the flight of creative thought cannot be stopped, and in some regions of our country there is still a need to reload the hunt, so I warn you that the "centroboy" capsule cannot be used in experiments on reloading rifle cartridges, it will not withstand the pressure of gases, they will break through into the bolt with all the deadly consequences for the shooter and weapons. You can't even pour smokeless gunpowder into rifle cartridges - the gunpowder will detonate, tearing the weapon. During the experiment with loading the cartridge 7.62x54R with gunpowder "Falcon", carried out by the St. Petersburg experts in the conditions of the test site, the lugs were broken and the box of the Goryunov machine gun used for the experiment was broken. The bolt flew back and was not found (the release of the weapon was pressed with an electric trigger, after hiding in the bunker, so no one was hurt).

You cannot equip bullets of automatic machine-gun cartridges in rifle casings with any gunpowder - the bullet diameters are different, in addition, the steel shell of an automatic bullet will quickly erase the rifling of a hunting rifle. The only relatively safe option for reloading, used by hunters in Siberia, is to drill out the capsule socket of the cartridge case under the Zhevelo capsule, equip the cartridge case with black powder and 8.2 mm canister as a bullet. With this cartridge, fishers shoot no further than 120-150 meters at small and medium-sized animals.

But unless absolutely necessary, it is better not to engage in such experiments - it is illegal and dangerous for the shooter's life, those around him and the integrity of the gun!

Read more about best reloading press for accuracy.

[adamatomic]

Design of Doom Eternal

Wanted to jot down some thoughts while they were still fresh, and I hate writing threads on Twitter, so, here we are.

(Surprise! Male game designer has DOOM OPINIONS. BEHOLD LOL)

First, disclaimers: what follows is super subjective, pretty picky, and likely unjustified. I love a good mobility shooter - Doom 2016 and Titanfall 2 are the only western shooters I really enjoy, and each do super interesting things spatially, mechanically, etc. However, I’ve never worked on any kind of FPS type of game, and never worked on a AAA game, nor shipped a game during a global pandemic, and there’s a lot that I don’t understand about what goes into making this kind of thing, much less how it’s even possible. Making a followup to a well-loved and hugely successful game is also a terrifying prospect. Finally, I am about to "dwell” on what I perceive to be “negative” things about the game, which is pretty unfair, because there’s a LOT of positives (it’s fun, it’s gorgeous, the load times are crazy short, the vistas slay again, amazing accessibility options, perfect audio, etc etc). But I think this is a game where a lot of the positives are really in your face, and what again I personally perceive to be the negatives are a little bit harder to put your finger on. And this isn’t a review, and definitely isn’t yucking anyone’s yums. This is me trying to figure out why this one feels a bit different to play. Hopefully the unanimously positive reception of the game by literally everyone everywhere (including myself) balances out whatever acid might be in these queries.

OK!

Jungle Gyms Versus Canyons

Ok, so. Doom Eternal is structured a lot like 2016 in that it’s corridors linking big wave-based arenas, which is a good structure for a game about shooting all the things. Arenas can be flat-ish or tall-ish. Tall-ish arenas seem to roughly come in two flavors: jungle gyms, and canyons. Jungle gym arenas are the ones that I feel like took centerstage in the marketing and gameplay of Doom 2016, as a way of showing off the double-jump / ledge grab / launchpad vertical mobility stuff, and because they make narrative / thematic sense in the human-built oil rig environments that comprise much of Doom 2016′s level architecture. Jungle gyms are distinguished somewhat from canyons by generally having what feel like distinct “floors”, or solid planes creating multiple separated levels of combat. Canyons, even if they have some transverse traversal elements, are more open and chaotic, with less concrete divisions between elevations. I’m belaboring this essential difference because it has a bunch of second-order effects on gameplay - jungle gyms allow you to jump from skirmish to skirmish, you can use your mobility options to “interrupt” combat, while canyons are more continuous. Jungle gyms usually have more obstacles (like the aforementioned distinct floors) which make it slightly harder for long range enemy attacks to land, which reduces the overall ambient damage-soak.

The key thing about all these arenas - flat open spaces, distinct jungle gym environments, and canyon style playgrounds - is that you definitely want all of them in your game, because the strategy and tactics for playing these fights changes a lot based on these constraints. When do you want a roof over your head? When do you not? When do you want your back to a wall? These are valid and important differences for these games specifically, especially when basic resource management strategies in these encounters is pretty similar, and because the enemy behaviors and attacks have so much variety.

So far, though, Doom Eternal feels like it has a WHOLE LOT of canyons, and NOT a whole lot of jungle gyms. It’s possible that this changes later in the game, so take all this with a big grain of salt. But the first 3-4 hours of gameplay are really dominated by canyon-style vertical arenas, which isn’t necessarily ideal in terms of variety (and makes you angst a little harder for the wall-run affordances of other mobility shooters). They also tend to be slightly same-y, outdoor, rocky environments, versus the more oil rig-inspired, recognizably human-scale mining structures of 2016 (I’m sure this changes later in the game too). The oil rig-inspired stuff also lends itself to jungle gyms a lot more naturally, so I feel like these choices of arena shapes and environment types are kind of an interconnected and difficult problem.

None of this would really even qualify as a problem, either - this is nitpicking nitpicks, at this point - except relying on canyons so much exacerbates some of the “fussiness” of the combat changes (those are next). For me, anyways - I’m not sure anyone else is feeling like these are problems haha. And it’s a big game, so I’m not sure how much this stuff changes across the whole campaign yet!

Tactical Ballistics

A Doom thing I adored in 2016 and am continuing to enjoy in Eternal is the way ammo, health, and other arcade-style upgrades are thoughtfully placed around the arenas. It’s a nod to the strongest parts of Vanquish’s level design, and goes all the way back to using coins in Super Mario to lure players out to new places they might not explore otherwise. It’s a huge part of what gives the nu-Doom arenas their “chess-like” feel, and shifts the fights away from Serious Sam-style battles and makes them into four-dimensional puzzles. 2016 doubles down on this tactical approach by leveraging a kind of resource triangle of chainsaw kills, glory kills, and just plain firefights.

A lot of Eternal’s design seems committed to upping the ante on all of these strengths. Lower ammo capacities puts more pressure on the chainsaw kills. There’s a new technique called “flame belch” that turns the resource triangle into a resource square to accommodate armor. Monsters have “weak points” now, shortcuts that change their behavior or get you fast glory kills. It’s a pretty compelling jigsaw puzzle of abilities.

It also places a lot of strain on player attention and cognition, because all this is running on top of straight-up arena-wave firefights (with 7+ enemy types at a time, all with unique behaviors and optimal strats) AND beefy mobility controls (swinging, dashing, double-jumps, ledge grabs, launch pads, etc). It’s kind of a lot. But I don’t think this is necessarily the place for saying “this is DOOM, man, you got to keep it simple, just shoot the monsters, how come there’s even upgrades” or whatever. For so many reasons, but the primary of which is that most of this stuff rules, and throwing it away would suck. So what do you do?

I want to focus on two small, specific things that really stand out to me - I’m not totally sure that they’re actually “bad”, but I think they have a lot of weird secondary and tertiary effects that contribute to some perceptions of “fussiness” in some of the battles.

Weak Points

This is a big enough change that it is repeatedly tutorialized through video on every loading screen, after every game over, and after every new enemy is introduced... so I know it was on the designers’ radar haha. And it's an interesting addition - chess fights in Doom are already about hierarchies, and adding another tiny hierarchy within an existing hierarchy is a NICE bit of tension to add, it gives a kind of scrambly feeling that is good overall. The issue for me arises from an apparent or perceived damage scaling issue around these weak points. For example, the optional sniper rifle upgrade to the heavy cannon and the optional sticky bombs upgrade to the shotgun insta-wreck the arachnotron and revenant enemies’ weak points, while sustained plasma rifle fire doesn’t seem to ever do the job. Which makes sense on paper - this is a nice way of putting pressure on the player’s weapon choices and ammo, which is what it’s all about. Although I guess you could argue that it’s also all about movement, and that this particular combat pressure has a pretty tenuous relationship with mobility in general.

Either way, it means you spend a lot of time squinting at your weapon wheel mid-battle to see how many shots your shotgun still has, because you ran out of chainsaw fuel a while ago, and are still being actively bombarded at a pretty long distance (because its a canyon and not a jungle gym). I know, I need to git gud, trust me, i KNOW. But check out the weapon wheel ammo display size in Doom 2016 versus Doom Eternal:

I love the new color scheme and ammo icons in Eternal! But it’s 3-4x harder to read the actual, very important ammo counts.

All these small changes add up to something that feels like a pretty different gameplay experience compared to the more spatial (read: movement-based) and literally easier-to-read resource management stuff from 2016. Which, it’s a sequel - failing to sufficiently differentiate it is its own huge risk. And, to be fair, 2016 had its fair share of fussy (though more legible) weapon switching. But when you add this stuff up, the matrix of considerations in moment-to-moment combat in Eternal is pretty different from 2016, and I think it largely comes down to the damage scaling around the weak points. While you can technically choose to play through battles without leveraging weakpoints (thus sidestepping most of these cascading issues), this approach is heavily incentivized by the major behavior changes that happen after you hit weak points (in addition to the constant tutorializing) and the waves appear to have been balanced around taking advantage of these things. Whether or not these are even flaws, technically, whatever they are is exacerbated by the UI design of the weapon wheel AND the relatively popularity of the relatively unobscured canyon arenas. So it’s hard for me to judge weak point damage scaling in a vacuum.

Overall, these new combat options make the arenas feel more constrained and more prescribed. Design is a nightmare this way: sometimes by giving people more choices, you’re actually giving them less. My pitch for a small tweak that might engage with some of these issues would be to keep weak points, but get rid of the damage scaling and maybe make the hitboxes a little bigger. The goal here is NOT to make weak point enemies easier so much as to open up options about what weapons you can use against them, thereby reducing wheel squinting, thereby freeing up more attention to movement and all the other stuff that ruuuules about nu-Doom in general.

Also, I should clarify that it’s entirely possible that I completely imagined the weak point damage scaling, and am a big dummy with bad aim.

Flame Belch

This is a pretty small thing, there’s this new “flame belch” move, intended to complement the existing chainsaw and glory kill moves as a way of “farming” resources from combat, one of the things that really defined Doom 2016. It differs in one huge way though, in that it has to be committed to BEFORE killing a monster. Chainsaws and glory kills ARE kills. Flame belch adds a status instead, which is “cashed in” later when you do the kill. If chainsaw kills and glory kills and BFG shots are Super Mario jumps, Flame Belch is more like a Tony Hawk jump - it starts early and is carefully calculated. Which is pretty dope!! But in this environment where weak point damage scaling and canyon layouts are already putting huge strains on the player’s attention, it feels like a big ask. The “triangle button” mechanic from 2016, the BFG, was a kill move with cool-down, so really I’m just suggesting stuff they already tried anyways. There’s no way this is news to anybody, much less the developers haha.

But... I would love to play a build where flame belch was totally a thing, just it was a finishing move, not a status thing. Let it plug into that reload-replacing resource-farming punctuation pacing flow. That shit rules.

Of course, I have to wonder what the unintended secondary and tertiary consequences of these suggestions would be. Good action games are often tenuous and deeply interconnected things where results are really hard to predict. Maybe they already tried these ideas and they sucked, or they know their own game a lot better than I do, and have a big stack of reasons this stuff would suck for most of their player base.

But wait...

Where The Hell Am I?

Last section, I promise.

I am extremely not going to weigh in on whether or not Doom games need “Story” or not, or what that even means.

But...

If you are driving a monster truck, it is probably pretty fun to see a big line of cars in front of you, and know that you are about to drive all over those cars, and that at the end is a really big fancy car... and you are going to drive over that too.

The general conceit of Doom 2016, that you are on one end of a Mars base, and you need to get to the other end, and in between is a whole lot of cars demons, is a good one. It has good monster truck-ness.

So far this is something that I’m struggling to extract from Eternal. I’m not really sure who any of these grumpy folks are, or where it is that they are, or why I am going down this corridor (aside from the very Doom-like fact that it is the only corridor around).

The problem for me is decidedly NOT that I don’t understand the slayer’s emotional whatever, or that I haven’t been painstakingly expositioned into the specific hierarchies of the demon universe, or anything that I think would normally be described as a “narrative”. For me, it’s that I don’t get to sort of soak in the anticipation of the loooong line of cars I’m about to crunch.

Does Doom need a story? Idk. Doom might need a lot of about-to-get-crushed cars though.

Finally finally finally, and this is highly subjective, but I think the slayer is just more fun when he’s an X factor or a rogue agent. NPCs recognizing the slayer feels sort of weird to me? The feeling that he is a fly in the ointment I think is stronger and sexier when he’s like... outside the canon, almost. I’m not totally convinced that having him Kratos around is as fun as having a bunch of demons and priests both confused and terrified of what this dude is doing.

OK

I need to get back to family stuff. They let me sit here and type this out, which was very kind of them. Only five tantrums so far. Either way, I’m looking very forward to playing more Doom Eternal...

...just as soon as I finish designing 17 more shirts in ACNH.

Hope everyone’s staying home and staying safe! Rip and tear, friends. Rip and tear <3

[tisthenightofthewitch]

GHOST ON HOW THEIR SATANIC CATHEDRAL TURNED INTO A FAMILY AFFAIR

Inside the extremely fun and incredibly satanic world of the pop-metal darlings.

Ghost have created something so special, you would almost think they struck a deal with the devil. Since their 2006 formation, the Swedish metal outfit have turned lyrics about defecating the holy eucharist into quaint singalongs, sold marital aids sculpted in the shape of their frontman’s head, performed on late-night TV to an audience of the demonically possessed and are currently playing stadium shows with Metallica—and all the while, they’ve only been giving it about 20-30%.

“This sounds like a joke, and I’m saying it sort of smiling, but it’s true—everything you’ve ever seen us do has always been a lesser version of what I had in mind. Always. 100%. So my original vision for everything is always twice as ambitious and goes through so many changes that we usually end up with 20 or 30% of it,” Tobias Forge says, also currently known as Cardinal Copia.

Forge, 38, is the Walt Disney figure “band boss” who conducts the decadent dark magic and weird whimsy that are Ghost—a band as humorous as they are blasphemous; as Beach Boys as they are Black Sabbath. They’re arguably the only group who can make an ABBA cover feel like it belongs on a record that contains a track about the conception of the Antichrist.

For those still uninitiated in the theatricality of the band’s iconography and public persona, Ghost are a band of nameless ghouls adorned in uniform black clerical garb and chrome-plated devil masks that are blank-eyed and devoid of mouths and any distinctive facial features. Forge has portrayed a different persona for each of the band’s records, always the demonic leader of the group. He’s been four versions of the satanic antipope, Papa Emeritus, over the course of their first three records and currently assumes the role of Cardinal Copia for their latest release, 2018’s Prequelle. Copia is a loose-skinned, expressionless creature of the Id decked out in a lavish tuxedo and inverted crosses galore, but regardless of the persona, the man behind the unholy imp strives to fully embody his role.

“What I like, especially when you’re stepping into a character, is never to be forced to step out of that character, which you have to do at times,” Forge says. “You allow yourself to become that weirdo onstage that dances ridiculously and does those things, and it just comes naturally. That gives me a kick because I personally transform into someone that I’m not really myself, at least when I’m sober. I’m not very much like that guy onstage in real life, but I can invoke that person by getting all that shit on, getting into character and going up onstage and that thing just happens. All of a sudden, I think differently, I say almost whatever comes into mind…it’s allowing yourself to just go on every impulse, and that’s what makes that character funny as well—he’s obnoxious.”

Throughout the history heavy music, there have been many theatrical bands, but Ghost are not only theatrical, they are theater. The band members are fully committed to their parts. The Nameless Ghouls are truly that—Nameless Ghouls; when onstage, Forge is absolved of himself and exists solely as Cardinal Copia. Forge’s full commitment to concept and character requires him to not only assume the roles of songwriter and frontman, but he also serves as the band’s chief playwright and director. Regardless of role or job description, Forge is, more than anything, an artist possessed by one thing: the idea of finding an unpremeditated flow.

“There is a narrative for every album cycle, and I do envision every show as a play, slightly more than your traditional rock ’n’ roll show even though we are a rock ’n’ roll band,” he explains. “It’s also, to the point, theatrical improvisation, in the vein of Bruce Springsteenwhere he asks the crowd, ‘What do you want to hear?’ That would not work with Ghost. It would disrupt the flow. It’s just not orchestrated that way. It’s not written that way. The setlists would crumble as soon as someone would yell out ‘Monstrance Clock,’ which is our last number. If we played that second, it would fuck up the whole thing. Whereas other bands and other artists, like Bruce Springsteen, have such a massive [catalog] of songs. He has so many ballads and so many uptempo songs that he knows that ‘I can play seven of them in the beginning, and it doesn’t matter because I still have 14 of them in the end.’ So he get away with doing four hours of that.

“As I said, I’m a stickler for flow,” he continues. “I really want it to flow like a Karate kata. I really want it to be like The Matrix when everything just slows down, and he just stands there. It just flows right through me. That’s what I want to achieve every night. So therefore, I regard it as a little bit more of a theater play where there’s a script, and my goal is to do it as fluently as I can without thinking. I don’t want to overthink things at all, and once I step into the character, I preferably want to stop thinking, because if I start thinking, then I start going through the moves, and I start faking it, and that’s what I want to avoid. By having a rigid setlist and a plan, I’m able to get myself and everyone else to do that.”

To many, the early allure of Ghost was how fully devoted the group’s players were to their parts, predicated on the clandestine charm of no one knowing the identities of the band’s members. The faces and names of Papa Emeritus and his Nameless Ghouls were completely shrouded in a secrecy that helped ease their fans into fully suspending disbelief and treating the presentation of the music with as much gravitas as a satanic clergy would command. In deep pockets of the sect, the name “Tobias Forge” had been whispered and attached to the Papa Emeritus character for most of their career, but it wasn’t until 2017 that Forge���s identity would be publicly confirmed as the ringleader of the group.

“I had come to a point in my life and in my career where not doing certain things was not doing me any favors,” he reveals. “It was making life hard, harder than I felt was necessary, and I just felt like now, almost 10 years into my career, the time and effort that I’m putting into the visual presentation should be so strong and so overshadowing whatever I do as a person on the side. So far, I’ve gotten the impression that that’s still the case. As long as I don’t overcompensate that, I don’t think that I will ever do anything that will overshadow the real focus of what I want Ghost to be.”

The 2019 Grammys provided Forge an opportunity to further challenge the public’s perception of Ghost. For the first time, Forge appeared in public as himself—stripped of all elements of pagan pageantry and accompanied by his wife. The couple walked the red carpet, posed for photos together and Forge conducted interviews without any trace of his Cardinal Copia alter ego.

“A lot of fans seem to embrace a lot of things that are mine, like my personal traits, and I’ve tried not to bring that into my presentation,” he shares. “But if they hold on to those and want to include it in their perception, there’s really nothing I can do about that. As long as they find that enriching or interesting, then…fine. The only thing would be those fans, who liked Ghost on the premise that it was something that they knew nothing about, and seeing my face on the red carpet may have destroyed all that and they don’t listen to Ghost anymore…OK. Too bad. These are the turmoils and tribulations that you stand in front of as an artist, you know? [Laughs.] You can’t let that dictate your life just because you’re aware of it.”

The meteoric rise of the band’s notoriety is nothing short of stunning. Throughout their career, the throughline of their material is the one thing they’ve never attempted to keep secret—this band make music about worshipping the devil. There’s nothing discreet or hidden. There is no veil of metaphor to pull aside, no subtlety. They write songs about Lucifer, and they perform on a stage that’s designed to give their audience the experience of attending a satanic church service. Throughout their catalog, they have songs that romanticize plagues, call for the coming of the Antichrist and very literally glorify the dark lord Lucifer, yet their latest release was sold in Target stores with two exclusive bonus tracks and a collectible lenticular album cover.

They’re the rare band who can fully embrace controversial and culturally taboo subject matter without listeners having to play their records backward to find it, yet they write such inherently catchy pop hooks that songs such as “Dance Macabre” are the perfect soundtrack for both your occult worship ritual after-party and something you could probably play if you were driving your mom to the grocery store. They’ve found a way to stay true to the Black Mass and still speak to the masses, and with that unique platform comes an extremely diverse audience and a fanbase who has grown out of the traditional heavy-metal demographic.

“When we’re playing bigger places for some reason, it’s a little more of a family event, to a certain extent,” Forge says. “The people are more in tune with the level that what we want to have it because we’ve been trying to get the point across that we want people to be excited. We want people to stand. We want general admission, big floor in front of the stage. I don’t like seeing frowns. I don’t like seeing feet, but you can’t start moshing. You can’t start hitting people. You can’t stage dive because there are kids everywhere, and there are small girls everywhere, and there are teenage boys and girls that cannot lift you because, you know, you’re a 40-year-old hardcore dude with a lot of muscle. You can’t jump on them.

“I think there’s often a clash sometimes—we are a metal band, originally,” he continues. “Sometimes there have been these clashes where you have the die-hard fans who’ve been with the band ever since [the beginning] who are used to going to metal shows only, and they want to claim Ghost as ‘this,’ and at a metal show, you do ‘this,’ and then you have this 15-year-old daughter of a dad, and they did not go to see Mayhem last week, and they were not at Slayer three weeks ago.”

In support of Prequelle, Ghost have been playing two-and-a-half hour sets with the ultimate goal of having their audience “come in overexcited and leave completely euphoric.” Currently, they’re touring as direct support for Metallica. The tour is further indication of the band’s rising celebrity, having earned the opportunity to play a one-hour set every night, but the gig has also posed a challenge to Forge’s ever-persistent pursuit of “flow.”

“It’s very different from the tours we’ve done so far in this cycle, because it’s supporting again,” he explains. “It’s stadiums. We’re playing for one hour, which is nothing for us. But the stage is four times bigger than an arena stage or a theater stage, so there’s a lot of real estate to cover, and it’s daytime. More often than not, it’s going to be maybe sunset, at best, but it’s going to be an afternoon or evening sun, straight in your face and also, not our crowd. It’ll be a Metallica crowd. They’re waiting for Metallica to play, so it’s a different vibe.”

Although touring in the Metallica support slot, Ghost have been afforded their full stage production setup, transforming the nightly stadium into a cathedral dedicated to Copia’s depraved church—giving the performers a fitting stage and the audience a fully immersive experience. Yet, despite the garish stage pieces and meticulously ornate sets that become more and more elaborate with his band’s growth, Forge heeds to the idea that with everything he does, what the audience sees is a compromised version of his initial vision. Whatever you see Ghost do is about 20-30% of what Forge wants it to be. Currently, Forge is fixated on the potential he sees in using the intermission during their two-hour set to elevate the show to the next level of theatricality.

“The idea with the intermission, originally, was for the stage to change so when we open up again, it would be a different stage. Things like that are what I’m aiming to do in the future if we can stay on an arena level, where we can bring our own stage. Then I would like to do that—whatever we started with ends up being something completely different. I want it to evolve. I want it to change, the same as when you go to see Phantom Of The Opera. They change the themes, and it takes you from A to F, and that’s what I’m hoping to achieve in the end. I think we’re doing a good job of getting people happy and euphoric, but I definitely think we could probably shift gears even more to get people completely euphoric when they leave. But it takes time, and there’s a lot of stars that need to align, and there’s a lot of things you need to work your way up to in order to have that consistency.”

So far, the stars have aligned for Ghost in ways that often never manifest themselves past the point of prayer. Their unlikely amalgam of occult phantasmagoria and radio-ready mass appeal is most likely a once-in-a-lifetime deal—but while it’s happening, Forge is fully devoted to serving Ghost’s congregation.

“I have no problem playing the same songs all the time as long as you have a crowd, as long as you have people there to do it with you,” he asserts.. “So that’s the one thing I’m always hoping for…happiness.”

The band’s latest Prequelle is available now here. Ghost are hitting a handful of U.S. festival weekends and returning in September for a full run. You can check out a full list of dates and tickets here.

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