#do u remember anything about it. was it bad

[mattsturnioloz]

Then I lost you: Pt 4.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.

Summary: Matt's career as a youtuber takes a toll on his 4 year relationship with his girlfriend, putting it on hold. Will it ever be the same again?

Warnings: angst, unresolved angst, crying, talk about intercourse, make out, fluff!!

Pairings: Y/n x Matt Sturniolo

A/N: (Felt like writing chapter 4 cause I need to know what happens😭 also I recommend listening to the song while reading🙂)

“You know deep down it’s for the best y/n.” Matt says to me, gently taking my hands in his, a few tears rolling down his cheeks. I feel a deep pang in my heart but I wipe my tears. I nod, hugging him. We share a long heartfelt hug, and it only gets tighter each second.

“I love you.” I silently cry. “I love you more baby..” Matt says, softly hugging me closer, his arms around my torso. This very same night we cuddle eachother close, not knowing if it’s gonna be the last time.

———- ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ———-

The next morning I wake up still cuddled up with Matt, my heart heavy. It’s soon, but I know I should house hunt right now. Because if I don’t leave soon, I don’t think I ever will. I sit up taking myself out of matt’s arms gently, not wanting to wake up, but he stirs awake anyway and yanks me down pulling me closer. It hurts so bad but this feels so good.

I spend the next week house hunting, not finding anything that feels like home yet. No where is home if Matt isn’t with me. Matt is my home.

Matt and I still act like a couple, because we know this won’t be for much longer, and it felt like how it used to be, when we first got together. Innocent and sweet. It hurts to know we’re letting this go. I feel like we just gave up on what we have too soon. I don’t want to let it all go.

Matt comes with me to check out a house and when we walk in, we instantly feel like this is the one for me. It was small and cozy, which I love since it’s only gonna be me. Only me.

I sign the papers and buy the house, with a smile on my face, but it fades once I remember the circumstances. My things are still at my old Matt’s place, already all packed up.

We walk into Matt’s room which once was mine too, after loading all my boxes of belongings into the u-haul. It feels empty and I take a look at his face and all I see is dread and tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Matt..” I almost whisper. I grab his hand pulling him closer to bring him into a hug, and he breaks into sobs. I’ve never heard matt cry, not like this. Tears roll down my cheeks as we hug again.

“P-please- Please don’t go yet.. i just want- need one more night with you..please-” He chokes out, stuttering and sobbing. “Okay.. I would love that..” I say softly, sniffing while cupping his face, lifting it so that I can look at him with a smile and I kiss his salty teary lips.

It was time for bed and I decide to shower. I go to the bathroom and I get undressed before getting in and letting the water run over my body. I hear the bathroom door open and I open the curtain, finding Matt undressing himself to join me.

Before I could even say anything he opens the curtain wider and gets in, kissing me sweetly and softly. We shower together while showering eachother with love.

When we finish, Matt turns the shower faucet off then helps me out the shower. Once we’re out he dries my hair and naked body with the towel before doing the same to himself.

We brush our teeth, still just in towels and when we finish Matt gently grabs my chin, turning my head to face him and he kisses me. It gets deeper by the second but no faster. It was lust-filled but in the sweetest way.

He lifts me up by my thighs gripping them and takes me to the room, closing the door and gently putting me on the bed before crawling on top of me and slowly removing the towel, kissing me passionately once again. He makes his way to my neck slowly, taking his time, being gentle.

We make slow but sweet passionate love all night, and tears were shed during it, but after we cuddled eachother close and held on tight because now we knew for sure that this was our last night together. We fall asleep in eachother’s arms, not ready to let go.

———- ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ———-

Matt’s Pov:

I wake up in the morning with y/n’s arms and legs tied around me and it hits me that this is our last day together, which also happens to mark our 5 year anniversary..

I want to take back what I said. What I said about us not working. I regret it. But I know it’s too late and the damage is already done.

I don’t know what i’m gonna do without her. She’s my light, and I can’t believe I’m this stupid enough to be letting someone like her go. I love her and I can’t imagine my life without her.

She was supposed to be my wife. The mother of my children. The one who I was supposed to grow old with. The one who I would be telling stories with to our kids about how we met and fell in love. I messed it up, and now I can’t take it back, but i’ve hurt her enough.

I feel y/n start to stir awake and I brush her hair out of her face, looking down at her with a loose genuine smile. “Good morning baby..” I say leaning down towards her face to give her a sweet kiss on the tip of her nose then on the corner of her lips.

“Good morning..” She smiles with grogginess in her eyes. Her smile pulling at my heartstrings. “Happy 5 year anniversary, my love.” I say kissing her lips this time. Her smile fades and her face is in a frown. Her eyes well up which makes mine too. “I know.. I know..” I hold her close as we cry together as I occasionally kiss her forehead. I wipe her tears before kissing her forehead one last time and we get up and get dressed up for the day.

We make breakfast while messing around and laughing together, and I couldn’t help but hang onto our love that’s still here and after breakfast I feel so much affection towards her.

“Hey, why don’t I take you out for dinner tonight?” I ask her pulling her closer by the waist. “Why not?” She agrees with a big smile on her face. I lean down to peck her lips softly. “Perfect, i’ll take you home so that you can get ready then i’ll be back to pick you up” I say enthusiastically. She nods and leans up, standing up on her tip toes to give me a kiss.

I grab my keys and I lead her to the car to take her home. We get in and on the drive there we listen to music and talk about whatever we felt like talking about.

Once we get there, she grabs her purse from between her legs and she give me a kiss. “See you later..” She says with a small but sweet smile. “See you later baby..” I say, giving her a warm smile. She walks off to her front door and she opens it, going inside and shutting the door behind her, I start the car and I drive back home. I was determined to make this the best last date. Just for her.

1,250 words.

A/N: (thought this was gonna be the last part but I got exhausted and didn’t wanna wait to post it so part 5 is coming out tomorrow and is gonna be the last part!! I got so emotional making this part omgggg, writing angst is not for the weakkkk😭)

Taglist: @watercolorskyy @starzinasblog @imwetforyourmom @urfavstromboli @sturniqloo @star-yawnznn @h3arts4harry

[chiscaralight]

Can u do mean dom xiao x reader? Any gender is fine. I always see him as a soft dom there hasn’t been a mean dom xiao post since like 2021 😩

nsfw xiao x reader idk if i can write mean dom anyone, I tried my best... don't hate me anons

Regardless of the situation, xiao doesn't talk too much. Because of that, you tend to act out a lot. he's not going to say anything anyway, so why not tease him just a bit?

bad idea on your part, because he'll always get back at you. he might tease you back in the privacy of your own, or he just might deny your orgasm for so long that you can't even remember your own name. even if you whine out how sorry you are from the moment you step into the bedroom, he’s not shaken.

“maybe you should’ve thought of that before you started playing in my face. don’t stop until i tell you to.”

and honestly, you want to do this. to prove to him that he doesn't have as much power over you as he thinks. so you sink down onto his length, fingers holding tight onto his shoulders as you start to bounce. it’s not long before you start crying though, legs shaking and so out of breath as you use the last of your power to tell him you cant go on anymore.

so he rolls his eyes, mumbling something about how weak you are. it hasn’t even been that long! he’d think you’d do better than that. whatever, anyways, because his hand is heavy as he pushes your face into the bed, fingers digging into the fat of your hips as he starts to pound into you stupidly hard. you’re gasping and whining at each thrust, every hit having you feeling more sensitive than the last. and your mumbles start to get more drawn out, proclamations of your impending orgasm spilling into the sheets of the bed. he’s fistinf your hair to pull your head up, and the only words that leave him are breaking your heart.

“don’t you dare.”

and you’re whining in protest, overstimulated and in dire need of release. you don’t even know when you come! vision blacking out and body twitching as his hips still. you realize your mistake though when you find yourself on tour back, his strong gaze connecting with your full of fear one as he pins your wrists down to the bed. all he gave you was one instruction, and you can’t even obey that. you want to cum so bad? he’ll make sure you do, as many times as he wants. you won’t even remember his name by the time he’s done with you.

[vermilionsun]

hellooo, i really love the headcanons u write 4 touchstarved. i totally understand if ur uncomfortable writing about this, so no pressure. but if ur okay with it, i’d be curious to see how the lis (whichever u prefer, but preferably leander or someone with a visible scar ><) would react to an mc with sh scars.

TW! Implied self–harm [as per the request] Let’s start with the basics; this is not romanticising sh in any way, shape or form—I believe it’s obvious

If anyone ever feels the need to let something out of their chest/venting, or even chit-chat about this and that, my messages are and will remain open <3

And always remember; Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

𝓐𝓲𝓼

✩ He didn't mean to see them. He wasn't trying to look for them.

✩ His eyes widened slightly before narrowing again. The subtle shift in his expression betrayed his thoughts as he debated whether or not to acknowledge what he saw.

✩ "What are those?" Not subtle, not discreet, straight to the point. "How did they happen?" he asked, his tone blunt but oddly caring.

✩ He took a step forward, and then another, standing so close that he could easily reach out and touch them. "Listen, I'm not gonna judge you or anything. I just wanna know…”

✩ He’s worried as fuck

✩ but remains as calm as can be, letting them take their time

✩ He took it upon himself to make sure the scars were healing properly (with what little knowledge he had from helping Kuras)

𝓚𝓾𝓻𝓪𝓼

✞ His eyes narrow minutely. He doesn’t show any sign of fear or disgust, and that somehow is even more alarming than it would’ve been if he had. The expression on his face is almost blank.

✞ His tone remains even, betraying nothing of his thoughts or emotions. Something in his stare is just the slightest bit piercing, however. He’s assessing them, studying all of the details of their form and expression. He’s… unnervingly perceptive. He keeps just barely out of arm's reach.

✞ His coat rustles as he gently reaches out, like he’s trying not to startle a small wild animal. A single long, slender finger traces one of the scars. "My. That is serious scarification. How did it happen?" He asks, as if he doesn't already know the answer. Or maybe he does, and he just doesn't want to believe it.

✞ He will push for an answer.

✞ There’s a long, heavy silence. A flicker of understanding clouds his expression. "Why?" The sharp tone melts away, replaced by gentleness.

✞ He lets out a tired sigh and pinches the bridge of his nose, all the tension leaving his body. For that moment, the mask of the competent, emotionless doctor falters, and he suddenly looks older, more worn-down, more vulnerable.

✞ "Don't… I've heard the same story far too many times."

𝓛𝓮𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻

🗡"Hey, what are those from?" His expression remained the same for a brief moment, a hint of curiosity in his eyes, fixated on the scars.

🗡When he noticed the pause, he took a step closer, maintaining a respectful distance. "It's alright. You can tell me."

🗡 As the words left their lips, Leander's expression shifted slightly, reflecting a tinge of surprise and a hint of understanding, though he remained calm. "You..." Leander started, choosing his words carefully. "Did you do this to yourself...?"

🗡The concern in his eyes intensified, and his voice dropped to a soft, gentle murmur. "Are there more?"

🗡 His fingers instinctively reach out—

🗡 He gently drew them into a tight embrace, holding them close against his chest, his body warm and firm against theirs. "Nevermind. You don't have to say a word. I'm here for you."

🗡 "You know, scars aren't all bad. They're reminders that you've survived, that you're stronger than you give yourself credit for…. Just promise me you won't do it again. Those scars... they don't belong on you."

𝓜𝓱𝓲𝓷

🕊 Mhin's demeanor would change the moment they'd spot their scars

🕊 They’d hesitate only momentarily before walking up to them, yanking any fabric away and inspecting them

🕊 "How old are they?" They’d ask, their voice a bit softer compared to their earlier attitude.

🕊 They’re just.. staring at them, the gears in their head clearly turning. Mhin looked quite… shocked, like they’d seen a ghost roaming the streets of Eridia.

🕊 “You did this on purpose,” they concluded. "Were you trying to…?" Their voice is careful, treading on thin ice.

🕊 For once, they ignored their pride and went with something their heart was telling him to do instead of their head; They soaked a cloth in the disinfectant eyes flickering back up to their ace before carefully bringing it to the scars. They worked silently, cleaning the wounds with surprisingly gentle touch before wrapping them in bandages once done.

🕊 “Who drove you to it?”

𝓥𝓮𝓻𝓮

✦ Ỳ̶̡̮̜̙̑̈́͆̄̌̾̈́̔̚͘ͅỏ̸̢̨̖̺̦̫̀͊̏̊͝u̷͚̜̟̟̪͎͙͂́̉̑̌̀̊̔̄̾̌͝r̴̨̞̪̽͋̌͜ ̵̧̡̞̺͔̖̳̱̗͈̩̟͛͋͜ͅͅs̷͈̯͊̀̃́̿̿c̶̨̨̜͈͙͈̱̀̑́̎ą̴̙̞̟̰̙͓̫̽͑r̴̢̢̡̙̭͖̦̝̺̮̄͑̍͛̓͗̂̿̂̿̓̒̈́̕ṣ̵́̈́̉̋̂̏͛̐̂̑͊̾́̕̕.̴̖̤̱͙̀̀ ̴̢̧͇̮͈̥̮̲͈̫̓̄̔̋ͅ

✦ It's unexpected. He is really close to them—too close for comfort. So close that they're able to feel the heat of his breath.

✦ His face is calm, almost emotionless, but there is something like deep thoughtfulness in his eyes and a little bit of irritation that he is clearly trying to conceal. 

✦ "A lot of them..." His voice is quiet, almost a whisper. There's something strange in his tone. "Who did that?" They feel his rough fingers on their skin, his touch not gentle, but not as harsh and cold as they'd expect. He seems tense now, looking at them with a kind of coldness that they hadn't seen from him before.

✦ He suddenly makes a quiet huffing sound, as if he's almost sneering. “What a waste.” He mutters and he finally steps back a little, his gaze still on their scars. “Stupid… What was even the point?” It’s something like a sincere question, that came out without him realizing it.

✦ He’s clearly trying to figure something out, staring them down, observing every muscle, twitch and every subtle movement

✦ “Was it worth it?”

[listleven]

Simple guide on manifesting ✨

Choosing what you want to manifest. This is genuinely the hardest part. Especially if you are a beginner and you think you choose something a bit out of reach for you.... no. Anything is possible. This is classic but even the word impossible has Im possible in it. The thing with this is if you are trying for the first time and have had bad experiences or are expecting bad you are going to try and go for something more attainable or completely over consume. AND THATS OK. Practice is great. Go for what you think is smaller if it helps you ease. But you can manifest even with doubts bc despite the misinformation you don't need to "feel" like you have it. What happens a lot is people give up and stop persisting when they don't see it in the 3d. So they have "backup options". And then they create this cycle of fear that if they didn't manifest this, will this work?? RELAX!! It will.

Persisting. Of course you've heard a dozen times before but why do you think its so popular. Now here you're going to persist until your desires materialize in the 3d. AKA when your subconscious mind has been impressed. Even in doubt you will persist bc it does not make a difference. You will THINK like the person who has it not feel if you can't. Thats literally it.

TIPS:

In order to think like the person living in the end you can write a story from that POV, affirm, meditate, guided meditations to help you relax, I use subs that use present tense, affirmation tapes, SATs, and sm more.

A little tidbit of my own is affirming that the 3d is no more real than a dream. Im going to make a separate posts in all the ways dreaming and the 3d are so similar. That way you can say stuff like "ah this doesn't matter its just a dream in the true reality I have everything I want." This can also induce lucid dreams because I do reality checks and confirm to myself that im dreaming and immediately start meditating to "ground myself" for 5 seconds by doing this Ive done it in my dreams.

Refocus to the 4d if you're ever in doubt. Everything right now, isn't real not time, or physical objects. Go back to the imagination. Its kind of funny right how everyone gaslighted us into believing imagination is not the reality and we had to "come back to the real world" LMOA its literally vice versa

If you are persisting and don't see it in the 3d, don't you dare give up to manifest something more "attainable" this creates a loop where you go back to number 1 over and over. Remember you already have it. How do you know? Because this is no more real than a dream and you are the validation.

Accept the 4d as the only real reality

If you have had "failed attempts" Revise. Bc in the 4d no you didn't??? Ex. all those failed pure conscious attempts are not real , you actually have induced them in the 4d. If you keep persisting and accept that all those "attempts" worked, the 3d will conform.

Reminding yourself you have something and reality checks are the same thing. The most biggest similarity in the 3d and dreaming is you can control both using the 4d. We all know how reality checks work right. Persisting works the same way. I mentioned this in a previous tip above. I’ll do many reality checks confirming the 3d is a dream (bc it’s not real and stuff) and I’ll “ground myself” this allows me to trigger lucid dreams when I sleep AND I’ll add in something like “ofc I’m dreaming in the true reality I have —-“. That’s literally how manifestation works. If something “ fails” NO IT DIDNT. If you got a bad grade after manifesting in a good one, what? But you did get a good grade. In your 4d the real reality. Remember. Remind yourself that none of this is real. You did get that A. You are dreaming. None of this is real.

There are no such things as failed attempts. That did happen. You did shift. Let’s do a “which reality am I in” check right now. Oh and would u look at that you are in your dr.

I’m definitely going to post more about the last two bullet points to give more clarification.

~ with love, Jyspire

[bitterbutblue]

Your Ruan Mei angst broke me I need fluff to restore my soul please 🥺🥺🥺

Also it was really good I was thinking about it for the rest of the day

ruan mei time~

you make me feel alright ☆ ruan mei x reader

~ I GOT U ANON SORRY RUAN MEI LOVERS FOR THE PAIN I HAVE CAUSED U here is one where she [REDACTED SPOILERS][REDACTED SPOILERS][REDACTED SPOILERS]

studying a stem degree and going through it unwillingly

SOTD: just fine - spookyghostboy ~

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────

As a scientist, everything must be objective and everything is always going to be black and white. She has discerned herself from anything that held her back from her true potential- anything that had to do with her past. Or just who she was.

You were everything she hated, everything she despised about who she once was and she wanted to hate you so bad. Yet something about the way you smiled at her for the first time was so infuriating that she decided she never wanted to see you again, but also wanted to spend eternity with you.

"Darling, what do you want for dinner?"

Ruan Mei looks up at the sound of your voice, her heart clenching in a way she really hated feeling but also simultaneously wanted to feel that way forever. She doesn't smile, she doesn't react and she barely flinches but she feels her finger twitch slightly as your eyes meet hers from where you were sat on the couch- sprawled out like a mess and she had to fight the urge to want to walk over and just lay down in your arms. She hates the way her heart jumps a bit, as if giddy like a child.

"I don't mind."

"I'll get us noodles. I'll order you a sesame cake on the side?"

The fact that you remembered her love for sweets had her swallowing, her throat going slightly dry.

"That would be wonderful."

"Great, it'll be here in twenty."

When you pressed a soft but quick kiss on her cheek, she feels her heart speed up even more as she looks down to bury herself in her work. She would honestly rather die than have you realise how red her face was getting in that moment.

(You knew though, smiling to yourself because how can someone be so adorable?)

You move to sit next to her, scrolling through your phone as you hummed whatever song was on your mind, taking a drink from your mug between intervals. Her eyes drift over back to you against her own will, gaze softening as she watches you break into a smile as you giggle at whatever stupid reel you were watching on your phone. She hated how carefree you were, how happy you were. She hated how you were everything she wasn't but she still can't help but love you more than she loves the world itself.

"I love you."

The sound of sputtering fills the silent room as you cough and wheeze, trying to catch your breath. You feel your face heat up as you look up at her, and you half-expected her to not even be looking at you, or maybe she was talking to someone else.

Her eyes are on you. They have always been on you.

"I love you too."

Your voice is slightly strained, shaky as you were barely even able to speak. You haven't been going out for long, maybe only a month or two at this point and some part of you knew doing this, dating her, would possibly result in you developing major trust issues forever or hating relationships or whatever bad ending would come out of dating someone like her.

But she has been the best experience of your life.

You just never thought she'd ever truly love you the way you loved her.

Ruan Mei moves closer to you, inching her chair forward as she awkwardly glances between you and your hand, as if wanting to take it. So you put your hand on top of hers.

"I love you, Ruan Mei."

As a scientist, she should understand what it is she's doing and why she does what she does. She doesn't understand the urge, or the sudden compulsion. But she finds herself surging forward, moving to press her lips against yours as if desperate to feel you against her. You freeze, and for a moment she thinks she messed up and this horrible feeling she wishes to never feel again washes over her. A horrible, icy cold, as if someone had just injected ice straight through her veins. But it warms up as soon as she feels your hand against her cheek and your lips move in a way she's never felt before. It feels warm and it feels... it just feels.

She can't describe it but for the first time she feels like she wants to smile.

"Never kissed anyone?"

Your breathless words, flushed face and soft gaze has her feeling like a puddle. She doesn't mind, for the first time ever.

"I may need to do that again... for scientific research." She mumbles dazedly, eyes still glued to your lips. You just giggle, pulling her in again- completely missing the sound of the doorbell ringing nonstop as she smiles for the first time against your lips.

[swordmaid]

i am wide awake thinking about that post canon jb au again when I should be sleeping …!!! such is the nature of the jbrainrot…

[urproblematicfav-arsonk]

Every time I see a post lamenting how Viv used to draw weird furry erotica, or the 2012 ass "pedo bear" style comedy that was always a joke and just fandom bullshit. How Stella obviously was supposed to be fucking her brother but its been pulled back on, or how ValAngel is obviously kink shit(even if we're also taking it very seriously at the same time)

Like, everything about this show was supposed to By Freaks, For Freaks. From the character design, to the edgy humor.

But fandom culture has changed a lot from when Viv first started out in that OC's tumblrina time. Ship and let ship has almost completely died, purity culture and the normalization of second degree murder has resulted in a creative landscape thats so fucking terrified to be seen as "problematic", that art is being pushed aside and sanitized because no one has fucking basic reading comprehension.

I mean, that whole thing where people were telling Bryan Fuller that he's the reason that gay conversion camps are good and should come back full force. The amount of trans women I saw on Twitter become publicly accused of "cp". A youtuber at one point SAVED the "cp" on her computer, edited the "cp" into a cutesy thumbnail, and distributed it. So, either its not csem and she fucking knows it and wouldn't have saved it and reposted it but really wanted to to tell people to kill this one specific woman, OR this is how seriously these kinds of people take things like literal csem.

Like, is Vivziepop annoying? Yeah, kinda. Is she not necessarily the best writer in the world? No, not really. But she's not a pedophile or some serial abuser because she's a furry. I'm genuinely so baffled by people watching a Furry Show and then being like, "omfg......she drew.........furry porn?????". I wouldn't be surprised if at least some of the reason Hazbin/Helluva turned out so wonky(outside of amazon)is just, Viv didn't feel safe or comfortable actually expressing her art and telling her story. There's so many people who would jump for joy if she killed herself, because they think snakes are a good enough reason to kill someone. Not to mention, the baseless accusations about stupid and meaningless things muddies the waters of actual abuse or things that could be legitimate problems. There's a 50/50 chance the thing Viv did that was problematic will be "drew pictures" or "has bad working conditions" and both of these tend to be held to the same standard of shit we need to take her down for.

I hate how you can't critique anything anymore, because saying you're "critical of the media" is more often then not, just a fucking dog whistle for "omg pls pls give me the opportunity to harass someone for not giving in to the thought policing I PERSONALLY have made up." Instead of someone who actually likes analysis and media criticism.

I'd love to complain about Hazbin/Helluva, I think it kinda sucks!!! I'm genuinely heartbroken that something that was obviously meant for Weirdos has been appropriated by puritanical babies, like they're horny housewives ashamed of themselves because they like 50 shades or whatever.

[sideblogdotjpeg]

i am not immune to launchpad sol and albin thoughts

[puppyeared]

Ouhhhh friendship I love friendship……..

[cerealmonster15]

haikaveh... save me haikaveh...

i KNOW it's been talked about to death but. the haikaveh research project. it literally haunts my mind. i cannot get over the implications. alhaitham going through his school life as someone that most people dont even really know about because he keeps to himself and doesn't socialize, with kaveh being the one exception to that, finding his way into his life as his Best Friend, and then leading to alhaithams one and only time he participated in a research topic. his bio says he only ever did ONE joint project!!! one!!! the one with kaveh his best friend and i think also his only friend at the time!!!! and then it ended in not only the project falling apart but also alhaithams only friendship. kavehs best friendship. they were each others closest person. they had no family around - alhaithams parents having died when he was young and his grandmother dying before he joined the akademiya, and kaveh's dad dying when he was young and his mom having moved to fontaine. like even if you dont look at it through a romantic lens it's still undeniable how important they were [and are] to each other..........

i'm getting off track but my point is very specifically for alhaitham, the one time he got close to someone, made a friend, even agreed to join one(1) group project ever, it ended in disaster. it led him into a fight so bad that his one and only friend said he regretted that friendship!!!! it was so bad alhaitham left the project and he and kaveh didnt speak for ages until they just happened to run into each other again at the tavern!!!!! like obviously it has to be incredibly awful for both of them but i just think how this probably had alhaitham in the cynical mindset that friendships and collaborations like that might just never work out for him because the one time he let someone into his life, it blew up on him and he was all alone again. even though alhaitham never seems to care much if people dont like him, that clearly cant still apply to someone he was exceptionally close to. like if he didnt care he woudlnt have been the one to take his name off the project and mutually not speak to kaveh...... kavehs words are the ones that hit the most significantly to alhaitham.......... kaveh is said/implied to have had at least some other friends while at school / people knew who he was, but not so much alhaitham. people didnt know him and the ones that did just knew he didnt socialize/he was not easy to get along with. he only had kaveh and then, for a while, he lost him too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[devereaux]

Simone Kessell: Acting at home and abroad... | NZ On Screen

[p1harmonie]

I JUST REWATCHED PIWON MOVIE AND I HAVE THINGS TO SAY

[dbphantom]

Hate having adhd went to go work on my fallout modpack, got distracted while going to disable the steam overlay, ended up in the points shop, went to go edit my profile, decided to change my pfp, found a buried folder I forgot existed, found some old Veneer art I forgot existed, spent 45 minutes looking at all the old photos, STILL HAVE NOT TOGGLED ONE SIMPLE OPTION THAT SHOULD'VE TAKEN 30 SECONDS AT MOST

[bombusbombus]

recoloured this old warmup to repost cause I had it on my mind.

If Clark is going to be in earth 19 (gotham by gaslight universe) (they're publishing more gbg and clark is going to be there), then listen to me listen to me, he needs to be a cowboy. Superman needs to be a cowboy in the big city. I am SOO serious about this. I am on my knees, DC, let me write for you, I would add so many themes about modern technology versus traditional knowledge and sprinkle in some anticolonialism PLEASE.

You could have a cute little Daily Planet that has to struggle against yellow journalism in a smoky little backroom & setting their own type, a la The Truth. You could have gentlemen's clubs. You could have a brutal war against unions in the streets and one lone titan of industry giving into their demands. You could have the exact same 3 batkids from the movie, there's literally nothing to improve on there. You could have Clark tear down a barbed wire fence with his bare hands, in a futile attempt to unravel colonialist ideas of private land ownership. Imagine the alien knows more about the earth, the real earth, than the knight in his city does. Imagine the American dream failing Clark, who has to go back east to the big city, failing Bruce, who lost his parents, failing everyone over and over until they decide to build something without it. In an era of rampant exploitation, what do real heroes look like?

Or you can make the justice league fight big steampunk robots ig I'm excited either way.

[misspickman]

transfem kon proposal could have been good if was good

[yeonban]

The thing about Tobias and betrayal is that he makes it look as if he only hates people who betray him. In actuality, he dislikes anyone who betrays anyone. He's not stupid, so he'll definitely take advantage of every person who's willing to double-cross their allies if it's helpful for his own situation, but they'd live under a false impression of safety and comradery the whole time bc Tobias would absolutely end them the second he'd be finished with their boss/friend/etc and have no more use for them either.

In his eyes, if you're able to betray someone else, even moreso a friend or a boss you've sworn loyalty to (*regardless of circumstances), why would you not betray him too? What use could he possibly have out of you which would override the amount of tracking he'd have to do to make sure you don't repeat what you just did to your former allies, this time to him/his friends? He has -100 trust in anyone who's given him information or aid to take down their allies, and while he'd be amicable and friendly to them the whole time they're useful, he would never give a solid damn about them. More than that, he'd make sure they'd die one way or the other, very likely in the same manner the person/people they betrayed did. #Retribution