#do u understand now. i am foaming at the mouth

[ipatrichor]

OKAY SO. content warnings for near-drowning, injury, death, and eldritch horror stuff typical of a call of cthulu oneshot. (dw tho i promise no pets die)

in the back of the cabinet under the front counter, there's a tiny coraline door that leads nowhere- just a white wall. however, when you touch this wall you go right through it into an unknown space beyond. ronnie spots it first and decides to ignore it until the old man who works with us, van (yes we called him old man van) crawls through and disappears at which point we investigate.

the premise is that we all work at 7-11. no one schedules the shifts bc the manager doesn't fucking care, so we've all showed up today. our group is comprised of:

- ronnie, she/her, a herbo with a dog who shits on the floor of the 7-11

- morgs (short for morgan), she/they, a punk lesbian who used to date ronnie before things ended badly

- cody, they/them, an amateur ghost hunter who's always high and has more parkour skills than sense

- eide (pronounced eed), they/them, a mystery with a backpack they keep almost as close as they keep their secrets.

ronnie's dog, commander ozzy, goes through and eide ends up following to retrieve him. thankfully commander ozzy didn't go far, and all eide sees is a room with winding tunnels leading away from it and pipes along the walls. when they return they tell us not to go in, closing the cabinet and keeping watch. the group splits- cody and morgs smoke outside and discuss their curiosity, eide texts an unknown party, and ronnie waits behind the counter.

eide goes to the back to snack on inventory while leaving their phone behind. morgs and cody return while the coast is clear, and cody takes their backpack and sneaks inside. two men come looking for eide, but ronnie and morgs lie and say they don't know an eide so the men leave. eide comes back out, learns what happens, and goes out into the front parking lot but is too late to catch them.

around this time, the manager comes back and insists on going after old man van despite ronnie's protests. after sticking his head inside, though, his sanity is greatly damaged and he returns nearly catatonic, barely aware of the world around him. ronnie does her best to deal with this, but is left with no assistance.

meanwhile, cody records their trip and leaves a trail of pencils. they begin to explore the tunnels while morgs keeps watch back in the 7-11 with cody's beloved pet lizard, galcan (short for galactic cannibalism). morgs glances inside to take another look, and while she does ronnie returns from stuffing the manager in a closet and yanks her out despite her resistance.

they argue, bringing up their messy breakup. morgs reveals that cody is in the tunnels, and ronnie is horrified and insists on going to find them and bring them back. the two do so, following the pencil trail.

eide comes back inside, finds them gone, and frustratedly enters the tunnels to find them. ronnie and morgs argue again, and morgs ends up splitting off from the group while eide finds a sacrificial dagger and ronnie follows the pencil trail looking for cody, who is having just a lovely time filming things.

they all hear a loud banging noise and rush towards it, reconvening in a cafeteria-esque room. galcan is happily returned to cody’s pocket, and a child's ball bounces by itself from a hallway leading to a weird door with an old-fashioned padlock and a tray of food next to it. ronnie is desperate to leave, and morgs teases her for being scared while eide investigates the food and cody films the door.

morgs promises to leave if ronnie goes and touches the scary door, which she reluctantly does. on the way out, though, a curtain separating the cafeteria from the kitchen moves somewhat and morgs just has to investigate. she calls cody over and the two joke around about the meat grinder and the gross hair in the sink. cody pokes it with a pencil and it feels squishy, which grosses them out. the drain starts to bubble and flood, alarming the trio who quickly make up their minds to leave- much to ronnie’s relief.

meanwhile, eide has gone further down the hallway, past windows that reveal only flat blue, and finds the bridge of a submarine. there’s a radar with nothing showing up, and a parascope that reveals nothing but more blue. the other three follow, and are trying to all get their shit together and persuade everyone to leave when something shows up on the rader. it’s getting closer, and when ronnie looks through the parascope she sees huge, indescribable creatures heading toward the submarine at impossible speeds. they slam into the submarine, loud bangs sounding and pipes beginning to burst.

they start running, only to find that there are several inches of water and rising on the floor. the pencil trail has been washed away, but ronnie remembers the way back and runs that way, cody pulling morgs along after her while eide pauses to investigate the strange door that’s now unlocked. they find a book and some information in a car’s glove box, and then take off to try and catch up with the others.

the water is rising fast, and as they come to an intersection all three see something that gives them pause. off to the right, ronnie sees commander ozzy swimming and runs towards him. on the left, cody sees galcan swimming and checks their pocket, confused to find her still safely inside. directly ahead, morgs sees a horrifying disproportionate creature waiting for them.

when ronnie reaches commander ozzy, instead of her dog she finds a piece of broken off pipe floating in the water and takes it. further down the tunnel is a green sign that she hopes will lead to an exit, and she wades toward it. eide catches up as the others follow her, all panicked.

the sign says exeunt, but cody points out that they’re in a submarine- any exit here will likely lead to the ocean instead of to the 7-11. despairing and resigned to swimming back through the tunnels looking for the original passage, they turn back only to find space bending around them and the green sign in front of them again. out of options, ronnie opens the door next to it. water rushes out into the rooms beyond, and they follow and quickly work together to shut the heavy door behind them to trap the water out.

they find themselves in a room with a single table in the middle, and a pitch black doorway on the other end with a bloody handprint on the wall next to it. with nowhere else to go, the group ventures onward- ronnie in the lead with a phone flashlight and metal pipe, morgs next with two knives she doesn’t know how to use, eide following and keeping their backpack close, and cody bringing up the rear with galcan and a vape pen because there’s no way they’re dealing with any of this sober.

as they move, the walls around them become narrower. they move, remaining metal but rhythmically expanding and contracting as if breathing. this tunnel ends in another room, empty except for what looks like a person sitting in a chair with their back towards the entryway. they breathe oddly, in a way that moves their whole body, and it’s the same rhythm as the walls.

ronnie, pushed to her absolute limit, wastes no time attacking the figure. she gets in a few solid swings with the pipe, refusing to stop as the others stare. the creature rises and turns, revealing itself to be a twisted abomination, and roars- lashing out at ronnie, who ducks out of the way and hits it again. she keeps attacking it until it lashes out and grabs her with a massive hand, squeezing and doing a fair bit of damage.

cody is afraid enough that it turns to anger, shouting ‘hey! that’s my coworker!’ and lunging. they latch onto the wrist and stab it, causing pain but failing to make it let go of ronnie. she manages to struggle out of its grip, but its other hand lashes out and impales cody through the ribs- missing vital organs and galcan’s hoodie pocket, but now dangling them from its hand as it moves.

meanwhile, the sound of the roar reverberating through her head and now cursed with the knowledge that the submarine itself is alive and the creature is just part of it, morgs examines the walls and pipes and starts turning nozzles, hoping to hurt the entity in some way.

catching on to her plan, ronnie hefts her pipe and starts smashing the pipes on the walls. these attacks cause steam to fill the room and hallway, gradually reducing visibility but also seeming to hurt the creature as the submarine itself screams.

kept functioning by adrenaline, cody starts sawing at the three fingers impaling them, trying to cut themself loose without removing the objects to minimize blood loss. it’s slow going, however, because all they have to work with is their pocket knife.

with the hand not wearing cody as a decoration, the creature swings at ronnie and morgs. morgs manages to dodge, rolling and coming up with knives ready and a wildness in her eyes, but ronnie is less nimble and gets slammed into a wall. behind them, eide finally pulls the secret from their backpack- a double barrel shotgun- and fires, staggering the creature. they then move to help cut cody lose, using the sacrificial knife they found earlier.

ronnie continues to attack the pipes, more steam spilling out and greatly impacting visibility. morgs tries to escape but gets turned around, running into the creature and getting grabbed. it knocks her unconscious and tosses her aside as eide gets cody loose, dragging them away to relative safety and reloading their shotgun.

ronnie, meanwhile, can hear the cries and yelling of her coworkers. she has a moment, remembering their frequently shit interactions and all the things she calls them assholes for, and decides- fuck it, if she’s going to die for her shitty coworkers, then so be it. she keeps breaking the pipes, even as the steam spilling out keeps burning her, until she’s gone.

ronnie is dead. morgs lies on the floor unconscious. cody still has three giant fingers impaling their stomach, likely bleeding out. eide stands functionally alone, their shotgun and their determination against the creature. they stand their ground, take aim, fire-

and everything goes black.

when they’re aware again, they’re sitting in a chair next to two hospital beds. in one lies cody, asleep but on the road to healing. in the other is morgs, who still has yet to awaken. her heart moniter flatlines, and all eide can do is watch, barely aware of the world around them, as the hospital fights to keep her alive and manages to restart her heart. whether she’ll ever wake up again or not, there’s no way to know.

[stargirlrchive]

hi cutie,

are we able to get a look inside how reader x jake bond after "the invisible strings" chapter.

after all these years it might still be awkward for reader to say they love jake, so she says it VERY sparingly. Jake will be a golden retriever and follow her everywhere and give her constant affirmations to make up for all that lost time and she just sits there and smiles, goes on with what she's doing until he's sick of all the "onesided" affection and he cries for her and asks why she's always so cold to him even when he's telling her she's basically the moon of his life or something.

Honestly foaming at the mouth when you update in your folklore masterlist. You are such a gem. 💕💕💕

folklore drabble: this love ✩ jake sully

masterlist ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ folklore masterlist

summary: jake sully x female!reader, she's a little angsty, fluffy ending

word count: 1.392

comments: every day i tell myself i am done w folklore but i get a request that i love and here i am lmao but i am working on a mini series, lets see if she gets published + another fic, depending on the time i get that one done, i might post later today if not tmrw! kk bye hope u enjoy this bbys

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Jake was so patient with you, always going above and beyond to show you just how much you meant to him, doing things most mates didn't do just because he wanted to. He enjoyed spending as much time with you as possible, now not having so many things to worry about, safe in the reefs he was able to make up for lost time. At least that’s what he tried to do but two kids later and it was still so very hard for you to express your love for him. Even though you felt it so deeply, all the time and at any given moment of the day you loved him. But it was difficult, far too real for you to repeat those words back to him.

It was so much easier communicating your feelings with him through physical acts. Like when he had you deep in the privacy of the forest, your body reacted to him so willingly, showing him just how much you yearned for him, just how badly you could not live without him.

He understood your trepidation, but it didn’t stop the sting that burrowed deeper into his chest. He was trailing behind you, Ney’la following closely as you coddled your newest addition to the family. Ozai. 

The little boy babbled in your arms, talking gibberish as you pretended to understand him. “Is that so, little one?”

A loud laugh erupted from Ozai, and it caused your eyes to light up. Ney’la tugging on the end of your tail. A laugh ripped from your throat as you swished it behind you, the four year old giggling loudly as she chased after it. He felt his heart thump to see you so happy, warmth bubbling in his chest as you laughed. Right before you entered Ronal’s mauri, Jake set Ozai down, letting him crawl after his sister as Ney’la ran straight into Ronal’s youngest daughter's arms. He tugged on your hand gently, his fingers tangling with yours as he pulled you into him. “Hm?”

He pressed a kiss to your mouth, it was soft and made your mind go dizzy. “I love you, Yawne.”

You just hummed against his lips, pressing a short kiss to his cheeks as you sent him a smile, walking away from him into the home of your closest friend.

Jake stood there frozen, face pinching in discomfort as you walked away from him. At times he figured your unwillingness to be so overly affectionate was because your kids were around, you had six total, it was nearly impossible to get you alone. But now, when it had just been you two, you still refused to say those three words to him. 

You had said them before, but they were far and few in between, in the past five years he could probably count on two hands how many times you’ve told him you loved him. And he’d still have a few fingers left.

Jake was spiraling, wondering why you couldn’t just say it back. Tears sprung to his eyes, something so unusual for him. He cleared his throat, rubbing roughly at his eyes as he shook his head, trying to clear his mind. He had many things to do with the men of the Clan, he couldn’t dwell on this.

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But dwell he did, he was distracted, what were normally easy feats were proving very difficult for the Toruk Makto, and everyone noticed it. Jake’s sadness was turning into frustration, evident in the way he roughly pulled the sphere from the water, empty with no catch. Tonowari dropped his hand onto Jake’s shoulder, “JakeSully, the day does not seem to agree with you.” 

The Olo’eyktan was trying to ease his mood, and Jake was appreciative. “Go home to your mate, we will see you tomorrow.”

Jake nodded his head, weakly muttering a goodbye as he made his way back to his mauri. His mind was swirling with insecurities, wondering if something changed in your perspective of him, was it not what you thought it would be? Was he not what you thought he'd be? Was he not doing enough?

He entered your mauri and was surprised to find only you in the home, chopping away at fruits and vegetables, a large fish already skinned and peeled right beside you. “Hello, Ma’Jake.”

You sent him a smile, but quickly turned back to your task, he just hummed to let you know he heard you. “How was your day?”

“Tiresome.”

Your motions stilled for a second at the bite in his tone, ears twitching lightly when you noticed something was wrong with him. Your fingers nervously gripped at the knife in your hand, chopping away quickly. “Did you get a good catch?”

“No.”

You huffed quietly, but decided against asking him anything more. If he did not wish to speak with you, then you were not going to pry. Awkward tension filled your family home, Jake’s frustration melting into sadness. He clamped down on his bottom lip roughly, trying to think of how he can bring up the topic. Your chopping was getting louder, a bit more erratic and he worried you’d accidentally cut yourself at the rate you were going. In a quick movement he was by your side, clamping your hand with the knife in his. You let out a deep breath, snapping out of your turmoil. “Why do you not say you love me?”

Your head snapped up to look at him, shock evident in your eyes. “Jake-”

“Have I done something? Am I-”

He let out a deep breath, his voice thick with hurt, “Am I not doing enough?”

Your eyes scanned over his face, his brows were pinched together, lips turned downward and deep hurt swirling in his eyes. Your silence was answer enough for him, his hand let go of yours, stumbling back. He felt like you had just slapped him across the face.

You instantly knew what he was thinking, you were up quickly, walking towards him. Tears welled your eyes to see him so hurt, your fingers wrapped around his wrist, “Yawne.”

You pulled him towards you but Jake refused to meet your eyes, “Jake-how could you think that?”

He didn’t say anything, still refusing to meet your gaze, “You do so much for me Ma’Jake, I do love you. I am just-scared.”

Your fingers gripped at his jaw lightly, pulling his head down to look at you. There were small streaks of tears on his face, it caused your lip to tremble gently, guilt webbing into your chest as he looked at you. “Scared?”

“Yes-like if I say it too much you will grow tired of me.”

Jake felt like someone had wrenched something deep into his chest, the worried lines on your face melting away as sadness overtook your features. “I-I am scared this will get ripped away from me.”

Jake cupped the back of your neck, pulling you towards him to press a deep kiss onto your lips, gripping you tightly against him. The words falling from your mouth, “I love you so much.”

Jake’s tail thumped harshly, pulling away to nuzzle his face against yours, “I love you.”

You pressed another kiss to his jaw, pulling away from him, “I will do my best to say it more often, Ma’Jake. Just-please understand I wished for this for so long and the thought of you changing your mind-it scares me.”

Your voice was low, just for the two of you to hear, “If I have to bring down the sun for you to understand that I will never change my mind then just say the words. You're stuck with me, Yawne.”

A small laugh fell from your mouth, “Not the sun, maybe a few stars.”

Jake’s chest shook with a laugh, pressing a kiss to your temple as he wrapped his arms around you once again. Your face nuzzled into his chest, pressing a light kiss against his collar bone. 

His arms rubbed down your back, gently pulling you closer as you hummed quietly. “Help me finish the food?”

Jake nodded as you pulled away from him, your fingers tangling with his as you pulled him along. “Just say it one more time.”

You laughed again, your head shaking as you sat down, Jake following after you. “I love you, Ma’Jake.”

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[decaydanceredacted]

oh am i ready to talk about joe trohman sph. also more kinky stuff in that book!

1. there is an absurd amount of piss stuff in that book like you can’t go 5 pages without seeing the word piss/pee there’s no way it’s on his mind that much and he has that much trauma related to it and he DOESNT get off on it.

2. a good 1/3 of the book is spent talking about his devastating mommy issues… followed by a bit where he says he always wants to be a good boy and will keep asking his wife for like affirmation…

3. a combination redacted by yours truly:

you’ve fucked before but he just ate you out and came from humping the bed, which u thought was strange b whatever, then the next time u actually see his tiny little cock for the first time and understand. u start laughing and making fun of it “oh isn’t that just the cutest little thing” “what are you really gonna try and fuck me with that? i don’t think i would even feel it” “that’s just pathetic, that’s why ur so good at eating pussy right? because that’s the only way you can make someone feel good?” and lay him back so you’re straddling his thighs and he’s just looking up at you completely red and humiliated and like on the verge of tears but his tiny cock is still hard and twitching “aw look at it, you like this don’t you? like me talking about your pathetic fucking cock” and he just slowly nods and stutters out “y-yes mommy” because he’s alr so far off in subspace he doesn’t even realize the title. you laugh at him and say “ok i’ll tell you what, if you’re a good boy and make mommy come with you’re mouth first, maybe i’ll think about riding your little prick” he looks all starstruck and says “thank you mommy thank you” and you move up to sit on his face.

you grind on him so he can hardly breath but he takes it so good and you keep telling him throughout “fuck, good boy, i guess you are useful for something, having your pretty little face used like a slut” and he just gets even more eager. when u come u squirt and he laps it all up and you chuckle and move back so u can look him in the eyes “wasn’t that cute, drinking it all up, i bet you wish that was my piss, huh? do u want mommy to fucking piss on u?” and he whines “yesyesyes yes please mommy” and so you grab his wrist and drag him to the shower and before he can even think you immediately start riding him

you’re whispering to him how bored you are, how he’s such a whore but can’t even make you feel good. eventually you decide to give him a chance to try and fuck you right so u let him get on top and the whole time you’re ordering him around on how to do it right and he’s so humiliated and trying so hard, telling u how sorry he is. when u can tell he’s getting close u abruptly push him off of u and have him kneel on the ground while u stand up “i’m gonna piss all over your face and pathetic little cock now and you’re gonna jerk yourself so you come while i do it. if you can’t then you don’t get to come at all” then u do it and it gets all in his hair and down his stomach and where his hand is flying over his dick and he looks soso desperate and then u grab a handful of his hair and he comes into his hand. u make him lick his hand clean of your piss and his cum and then finger you until u come again to make up for not being able to do it again when he was fucking him.

he’s such a sweet boy.

-spiral anon<3(ouch this was long and i still have more *foams at the mouth*)

.

[bookwyrminspiration]

okay alright. onto uhhHHHH. DO i have thoughts about it. AM i coherent. here for now until my brain reboots (i was looking up paper girls trailers like WAS this show actually good for like ten minutes and it threw me off)--this shall be an all over the place ask by the way--: jorat is SO INTERESTING i am FOAMING AT THE MOUTH. CHOMPING AT THE BIT TO GET ENOUGH DETAILS ABOUT THIS COUNTRY TO ANALYZE THE EVERYTHING. the respect for the horses!!! FIREBLOODS!!!! their honor code (and all the ways that the antagonists continue to perform offenses against it)!!!! the environment!!! the SKIN MARKINGS!!!! just GRAHHHHH. AND THEY HAVE AN ENTIRE TRANS FESTIVAL. obviously the country is not w/o its prejudices (read: the giant ass xenophobia signs and also the assholes that are oreth's family regardless of who owns who) but it is so interesting to just!!! just the everything it's just everything. the things of idorra and thorra and mares and stallions and the respect you give to people and how everything is based on the herd mindset: what you protect, you own, and all that.

ALSO- STAR! OF CO U R S E HE'S DORNA'S CHILD LMAO. oh man. sad i don't get to see him as a main character taking up more space right now but also yk janel very much takes up the role of that specific kind of character... OH AND! kihrin understanding the gender thing, associating it back with his own culture, when janel finds out who father zajhera was.... What a Scene. i find myself comparing it to jess and morgan sometimes and then other times not... very similar character shapes, but the dynamic is shifted to the left.

Literally! I heard about Jorat and immediately went I need to know everything ever about this country. I love that it's not perfect. It both has these lovely beliefs about gender and has questionable practices alongside that. I made a shitpost about the inclusive misogyny--because it's still a divided country based on gender, it's your internal gender identity that matters, not your physical sex. Which!! Is a fascinating idea!

There is a place in fiction for idyllic, escapist places, but sometimes you want to explore something imperfect but different. To have something interesting and new to question and think through and explore. Jorat wasn't made to be a fantasy it was made to be a place in a fantasy, you know? And places aren't perfect. Jorat is both victim of being misunderstood and disrespected and perpetrator of strict rules and xenophobia against the other countries' ways of life.

and the festival of turning leaves!! in exchange for some community service for a while Galava will literally change your physical sex for you, and not only does this exist but it's cherished. It is a valued and beloved festival amongst the joratese. Jorat I love you. Not in spite of your imperfections, but because of them. Because you are not a perfect place you are a real place with real problems and complexity. Even though I don't want to participate in the idorra/thudaje system it's so fun to ponder

Also shout out to Star! what a fun character even if he's not around very much. Janel does absolutely take up the genderqueer character mantel valiantly, but I wouldn't have complained about having another. Though their are some discussions of gender to do with other characters (specifically Tereath).

it's hard to conceptualize that Father Zajhera scene at first (at least for me) because like...we've just met Janel fully, but thinking back. Holy FUCK. Imagine. The man who saved you and personally attended to you for YEARS after a horribly traumatic incident. a kindly mentor who literally treated your MIND. and he turns out to be RELOS VAR??? that is fucked beyond belief my god...would be very curious to hear more about this jess/morgan comparison though!

[ohwell-itsme-but-danganronpa]

saiouma post game AU inspired by Taylor Swift music

a thread I started on twitter in March (2021) when I was listening to half of the evermore album ( and a bit of folklore) on loop

ironically, it starts with "closure", from Ouma's perspective who thinks that Saihara reaching out to him now is unnecessary and performatory only to solidify Saihara's good guy look in media's eyes, not out of care and that he only wants closure from him

the idea that Saihara just wants to tie loose ends, be told what he didn't understand and probably apologize for some things that are meaningless to Ouma as long as they ended the game anyway is repulsing to him, so he shuts him out, bc he doesn't want that sense of finality

next up is "gold rush", it's really loud about v3 cast everywhere he looks, but all the credit for HIS plan goes to Saihara and partially to Momota, while he gets the rep of "Komaeda type character" with "you tried" sticker and "are you insane?" looks pointed at him

Saihara totally hates the attention, but Ouma doesn't know that since they DON'T communicate at all, so he's really bitter about how much Saihara is loved, just collecting what Ouma worked for. On one hand, he predicted that Saihara would have to finish the game in his place

he left all those leads for him, because he knew he wouldn't be there for the final, and it's fine, Saihara carried it out the way he wanted him to, so why is he mad? and well, in this song there are so many lines that just... h

"I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch Everybody wants you Everybody wonders what it would be like to love you Walk past, quick brush" bitch, you're jealous and distance yourself because you want to pretend you don't care

"Eyes like sinking ships On waters so inviting I almost jump in" hate to break it to you Ouma, but it doesn't sound like you don't like the gold eyes after all, I meant rush, gold rush Like "jump in"?! hold your horses, take him to a date first, dude

"I see me padding across your wooden floors" Literally fantasizing about living with him, I told you to hold your horses. "My mind turns your life into folklore I can't dare to dream about you anymore" Wait, not like that-

So for him the moment he realizes he's into Saihara he immediately assumes that it'll never be, and he has a lot of anger at Team DR, at all the fans, at himself for being attracted to someone rn (while there are other things he should focus on),

and at Saihara for (what he only assumed is) an attempt to smooth over the problematic persona of Kokichi to get a good ending for the public view. So the *totally* reasonable thing for him to do next is to give Saihara HELL, obviously.

And so the next song is " 'tis the damn season" and I am so vibing with that one, y'all don't understand, it's like, soft violence, the longing, the "we can call it even", I am foaming at the mouth, this one gives me so many scenarios

"There’s an ache in you, put there by the ache in me" aka it's angst time, the pain when, ugh, when you're an idiot hurting your own feelings and messing with your crush's head, because you can't stop yourself from either flirting with him or pushing him away the very next second

(and this is where I said I am gonna take a break and then didn't come back to this until today)

okay, so I can't stress this enough - my post-game Kokichi continues to hide behind his in-game persona and dials it up whenever there's even a chance of publicity. I'd like him to quote "It's obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together" to Harukawa but really, he died for those people, he might do something like that in an interview for show, but the attitude from mad woman is directed at TDR and fans... for the most part. He acts like a spoiled celebrity and he's always having a scandal, whether it be getting into physical fights with fans or reporters, or saying something offensive or throwing a fit and trashing a place (like a hotel room or a store) because he got upset, being caught drunk or smoking, making crude comments about other participants of the game when asked at the events they're forced to attend because of their contracts (he won't answer anything if they get to him any other day tho) so in his " 'tis the damn season" era a lot of rumors is born

A lot of them centered around him and Shuichi, most of them having a bit of truth to them. There is something developing between them because deep down it's what both of them really want, but Kokichi is still playing with Saihara's feelings, making it a game of cat and mouse, pulling him along, being the one to seek him out, flirt, but also always the first to backpedal and leave him alone in a rush

but eventually it starts to get through to him that Saihara actually cares and that it's hurting him, so we enter with champagne problems when he realizes Saihara is being genuine with him and the "dropped your hand while dancing" is literal because it's one of the official parties, organized by one of the many anti-danganronpa organizations that ask Saihara to give speeches on their events like this one, and they're waltzing, having a quiet conversation, Ouma's tease backfiring on him and he runs away just like that

Cue him holing up god knows where to mope for weeks, agonizing over worst case scenarios, playing it over and over in his head, certain that he hurt Saihara with his playing and pushed their relationship beyond saving and that's when the last great american dynasty starts playing, because he uses that time to finally sort through his pre-game stuff too, and it turns out they were almost-not-really together back then too, so he blew it thrice and they won't be getting any more fresh starts therefore "Who knows if I never showed up what could've been. There goes the loudest woman this town has ever seen. I had a marvelous time ruining everything :)" bc he read his diary and thinks it's his fault Saihara joined danganronpa (it isn't)

and there's no way to incorporate my tears ricochet smoothly with its literal message but I think about "I didn't have it in myself to go with grace" a lot and if you re-frame it from Momota killing him directly to their whole group scapegoating him and pushing him in the direction of becoming the villain they wanted him to be just to wonder why he doesn't come to group therapy and tell the press they have no idea why he's being hostile with them now that it's all over. It'd be simpler if they still hated him like they were always supposed, but now their eyes are suddenly open to bigger enemies, so they believe he can just... what, sit in with them like it's all sunshine and rainbows? Like his presence doesn't make things more painful? "Look at how my tears ricochet" in a sense of a realization, the same sentiment as "There’s an ache in you, put there by the ache in me", the way he's hurting affects everyone. When he separated himself from the group in game it was noble, but now it's borderline sabotage of their progress out of avoidance, he's withholding closure, denying healing that has to be done, it isn't just about whatever mind games he's been playing with Shuichi, Kokichi is stuck in his game mindset, creating a tear in their group by alienating himself from it. He needs to talk with Miu, Gonta... even Kaito

He has to work out his place in the group and spend some time with friends, doing some healing before he gets back to Shuichi and they actually, finally talk things out, get together.

[volot]

seeing u reblog the critique thing at 12 am while im trying to sleep. furiously opening my laptop. first of all let me just say that i never think its a bad thing when character portrayals change over time. i think thats the natural progression of like. Writing a character consistently. if your character didnt like, change, as ur writing them i think itd be kinda boring! i obviously cant speak for you but i dont think youve lost sight of what u were originally trying to do with volo, and if it helps at all, i can speak from the perspective of someone who was here in the pretty early stages of ur volo blog and then disappeared for like 2 months and came back. ur volo feels as real to me as he ever did, and any changes in your portrayal i think are again, just natural progression. ESPECIALLY since like, oh my god, when you start to write a character ur still figuring them out yknow! and ive ALWAYS thought youve had a really good grasp on volo. and youve only continued to prove me right about that. not to disparage any other volo rpers (because i LOVE THEM ALL i love all the different takes) out there but you are genuinely one of my all time faves. i dont rly do like, "mains" or "canons" but when im thinking about my emmet and volo its usually u im thinking of because i just think the way you write him is such a beautiful. god theres a word for it idk but like ur volo??? ur volo is like the goliath to my emmet's david. and i know in my brain theres a better word/analogy for that but i cant think of it. its just that they are so stunningly similar but different in the most interesting ways and your writing. your analysis. your headcanons. everything about u and ur volo make me foam at the mouth like IM the one w rabies and not emmet. your writing and critical analysis inspire and motivate me literally so so much. god what the hell no im not crying youre crying. we're our own worst critics. i worry every day that my emmet Sucks or isnt consistent and you know what? i think its okay if a character isnt consistent ESPECIALLY characters like volo and emmet. theyre unstable n unpredictable. theyre 3 dimensional. in real life, people ARENT consistent. in real life, people dont always react to or think the same way about things one day as they might the next. your volo is so human and so real. ok i think thats the end of my spiel goodnight lucian i look forward to seeing more of ur volo when i awaken.

›   ❝  prompt: concrit.

morty i do not have the image on hand but do you know the stick guy on his hands and knees on the ground but the bg is red... that's me right now.

firstly Thank You this is very nice to hear and i'm flattered by so very much of this and that you think of my volo so much, and that you enjoy him so thoroughly! the analogy is an especially good one, and i definitely see what you mean by it because they are two forces opposing each other. :') also i am shaking you fiercely you are your own worst critic.... your emmet is nothing if not consistent and absolutely top-notch, and you ought to pat yourself on the back more! i always absolutely adore what all you're doing with him. and you!!! you inspire ME!! i can't tell you how much your analysis on emmet keeps Me going.

as for the rest of this, i definitely get what you mean and you are right in saying people aren't normally very consistent people, and that volo is a very inconsistent, unpredictable character... i think for me, my fear with it is as i think? i may have talked about it before on here is losing my original 'sight' of what i wanted to do with him, which is understand his character and explain why the way it is, humanizing him while neither woobifying him nor making him some cruel, heartless villain because i don't believe he's either of those things. he is a very tragic person who, despite his tragedy, is not necessarily a good person: he's by no means the worst, but he isn't by any means perfect. what i wanted to do with volo is highlight why the way he is, where this comes from, and... i guess, in an ironic turn of things, understand him and make sense of him as a person afflicted by his tragedy and how this changed him as a person and how it manifests in what he does while putting it out there that despite what depths he may go he is still very much a person, in an odd sort of parallel to how he wants to understand arceus? muns choose the muse and muses speak to the muns, i guess.

either way, a lot of my hemming and hawing comes from my chewing on the idea of 'am i doing too much of this? am i leaning too much this way? is this contradictory to his earlier characterization in a bad way, where he has lost some of his nuance? has this development dampened the portrayal? is he edging into mustache-twirling villain territory, or losing some of his original spark?' things like that.

so hearing that he hasn't really lost what was originally there is relieving, and i appreciate it! i'll definitely keep it, and everything else here in mind, because what you said is true. thank you morty 😭goodnight, and i look forward to seeing you and more of your emmet when you wake up!

[thelostdisaster82]

So once again ……

It all makes sense! From the white sand in my bed and only my side of the bed sheets comforter and mattress and pillows all wet the water next to the bed every time I get up in the middle of the night. My neighbor who knows a bunch of useless knowledge or at least pretends he does,. To me when they get talking I tone them out but for some reason there are few things my brain remembers….

1.“dry drowning.”

(When this airway closure happens and no water goes into your lungs, that’s technically dry drowning, explains Dr. Milk. “The injury happens from a lack of air and asphyxiation.”)

2. reflex called a laryngeal spasm.

3. Pulmonary edema

(causes you to have trouble breathing or experience frightening sensations like shortness of breath and chest tightness. “Liquid, or fluid, is actually in your airway,” he continues. “You’re kind of drowning in your own fluid, even though you’re not in the water.”)

4. Heavy, persistent coughing.

Shortness of breath or trouble breathing.

Fever

Dry mouth or foaming at mouth

Skin discoloration

So my neighbor old roommate was at his house grant u we haven’t seen her in few months since we had falling out bcuz I’m pretty sure she was screwing my husband . I called her out on it and she quit coming around or speaking to us. Or me at least I thought.

When we went over there she pops off with

Drowning would be a shitty way to die. I mean u just can’t breathe screw that. … i mean the cops done took my truck spray it down looking for blood on it couldn’t pin shit on us anyhow so fuck it!

My husband like ya hahaha

My neighbor says right then …

My neighbor starts going on about pulmonary edema Heavy, persistent coughing. Shortness of breath… their lungs fill up and they just quit breathing. Your lungs stop functioning correctly.

Idk wth the whole conversation ever came from bout drowning or anything and I was just completely flabbergasted.

And it hit me like a ton of bricks today.

My husband always telling me he gonna kill me and make it look like accident.

This would be exactly that. Im not a smoker yet when I walk from bedroom to bathroom im outta breathe my skin color has been off kinda grayish white and I feel like I’ve got something stuck in my throat all the time and I can’t seem to drink enough and Always have extremely dry mouth. Fevers on and off and the absolutely worst headache of my life and my legs and stomach and face are swollen.

The sad part is I just don’t fucking understand why someone who has done absolutely everything I could possibly do for him and yet he would want to hurt me like that? Craziness! It breaks my whole heart. Why would he do that to me? I know the other two people are fucked up sick twisted mf who I still ain’t scared of. Any man that has to sleep with pistol on his chest has some pretty fucked up demons and he says he shoots when they run well coward if ur gonna shoot me ur gonna look at me when u do it cuz I am not afraid to die….do me a favor but knowing the person u love would devise a plan like that? And as far as the fat bitch….I thought u was my friend but all u are is left overs has beens …with bleached out crotch panties….leave that shit at ur own house oh that’s right ……u don’t have one u lost it! I used to feel sorry for u but now I know why ur best friend friend fucked ur bf it’s called karma for doing the same to someone who didn’t even know ur ass yet I made ur bf look like bitch n took ur truck back left him on side of gas station looking like Edna bcuz u had to move out and he had taken ur truck. But it’s all good ! U will always be third wheel in ur threesomes…mf laugh at u bout ur sad notes u wrote them bout being third wheel … but my own husband to stoop down to this is beyond me. Gag is up Check mate mfs u lose….I’ll always be smarter than u! Not to mention I am Not a Holy person but I’m perfectly protected by my God! So kick rocks and eat fish heads…if something happens to me they know where to go!

[foxfairy06]

Ollie here again. does really matter whether i point that out so whatever. u said you weren't rude and then called me a pissbaby so, And the "saying super homophobic shit" I'm aro/ace myself nor do i believe legit anything of what i said that was homophobic, u will not believe me. i do not care.

You diagnosis a "brief" examination

I myself am diagnosed and that was the way i was diagnosed myself, i explained another version which I myself was also diagnosed under, as you can see we cannot relate with how we were diagnosed, so this is proving my point that how you have gotten diagnosed is not a universal thing so you can now see why i was skeptical, because even with telehealth if you don't have insurance, it still costs money. which this also depends on where you live, because in America they do not care about free healthcare. and from the places that i understand that do give free healthcare like Canada if your a birthed citizen , and like Australia or smth, How you got diagnosed is not universal, it depends where you live and what hospital you go to ect.

hypocrisy: the examination.

You clearly weren't understanding the meaning of what this word is so i will put it here along with the example i previously stated. from the Merriam-Webster "a person who acts in contradiction to his or her stated beliefs or feelings" you say you support Trans ppl but if they don't meet your criteria of what YOU think a trans person should be you, exclude them. your reply was also not related to the point i was attempting to make, "It's not hypocrisy to provide a safe space for a group and exclude people" You should have worded that better with the point you were attempting to make, Ill use a similar example to one a friend told me "i joined a adhd club and they kicked me out because i wasn't "adhd enough" Its what you are doing and its hypocrisy, you are telling people "yep i support trans people but oh if you don't have a diagnosis something that sometimes cost quite a bit of money, you aren't valid and you aren't transgender because i say so", not a exact quote but you should get the idea.

I was incorrect: a analysis.

I will say i was incorrect about rad meds and trans meds. "If you would actually interact with trans meds instead of foaming at the mouth and screaming in all caps whenever you see one you would know that."

Sorry that i don't wanna associate with someone who's harming the transgender community and states that the multiple years of my transition aren't real because i wasn't diagnosed, and that I've basically only been a actual trans man as of recent because i got my diagnosis within the last 6 months. so all of that experience i've had was just me being a tomboy..

Do you hear how that sounds crazy, that everything i learned in all those years, I've labeled myself as trans is now just me being a tomboy woman who was just struggling with their mental health and how their body looked ect. ect. that's saying that my entire transition was just me pretending to be a man. that's so heartbreaking knowing that some trans people in my own community didn't see me as a man because i didn't have a diagnosis. but maybe you got a diagnosis before you started transitioning so you might not even know how that feels, but what do i know right?

You arent a poor child: a small examination

Yes i did look into this, now if you mean the term like poor as in lack of dollars maybe, that could be the cause and I'm not going to discriminate against that.

You could have meant poor as in "woe of me" type of way.

But you aren't a child. your in college , as u stated on your Youtube video, which is public, and i will ask you to please ask non trans meds about the information in your videos because me and my inclusionist friends definitely saw false things in your "lgbt 101" episodes, which you say are based of your opinion and how there are others that exist but you never actually go over those opinions and let a watcher think about which one they believe themselves.

And harassment in America means: " It is commonly understood as behavior that demeans, humiliates, and intimidates a person,"

I haven't attempted to lower you statue in the trans med community and i do not care to do so.

I did attempt to humble you, but the information that i believed was to be correct was false and you instead humbled me so, its whatever.

and i will say i took the screenshots incase you did delete anything or attempt to spread a false narrative, but i did not have any mean to actually use the photos against you in any way. as i said in this message which you have most likely seen "its possible they are sending screenshots of not the whole story so i have the whole thing", saying "gathering stuff on the owner" was false and i do not care enough about you, which u could say "oh you do, you've sent me 2 asks and talked to me on discord" being blind sighted by rage is a interesting thing. i cared about making a impact, because i was angry.

You told me i needed to get help, some people can not afford to get a therapist, i don't want a therapist that i wont feel comfortable with and have been taking my time searching for one that will fit me. I'm glad that you are able to get the therapy and help you need for little to nothing but i able unable to do so.

-ollie,

I'm still annoyed but I'm not angry so.

hopefully this is enough for you.

> you said you weren't rude and then called me a pissbaby

Because i wasn't rude in the chat. I wasn't rude to you, until you were rude to me. See how that works?

> I'm aro/ace myself, nor do i believe the things i said, not that you'd know that though

I know you were trolling. However you thought the best thing to do was harass a server that is open and accepting of asexuals and run by several asexuals was to pretend like you avidly oppose asexuals, and make homophobic claims you do not believe in because you wanted to hurt people. And we're the group that's harmful? Right.

> the way i got diagnosed is different from the way you gotten diagnosed, so you can see it's not a universal thing, blah blah blah.

I live in america. In a red state. I have zero insurance. I have not spent nor will I spend a single cent and yet i am being diagnosed in two appointments, one in person and one over the phone. I am not using telehealth. I also have an entire server full of diagnosed people. Some have been diagnosed for no additional costs to the physical medical services they attended to in the ER, physician visits, PBH, ect. So don't give me that. It is not difficult to get a diagnosis if you attempt to do so.

> your example of why you aren't a hipocrite isn't true because i had a better one, and adhd club that kicks people out with adhd for not being ADHD enough.

That isn't what this is. Ths isn't a "trans enough." Debate. This is a "trans at all" debate. Only trans people.

> your belief that you must be diagnosed

I never said you must be diagnosed not has any common transmed ever said that. It's a strictly radmed thing. We believe you must have reportable or "diagnosable" dysphoria. Which includes persistent euphoria in most cases because euphoria is caused by dysphoria.

> sorry i don't want to spend time with people who told me my years of transition aren't real because i wasn't diagnosed

I can't confirm this isn't true but my other mods have seen your account and know that you are likely a minor so imma take that with a grain of salt. I highly doubt transmeds have been telling you your transition isn't real because you weren't diagnosed. A, because transmeds are quiet irl. B, because there is only a very small portion who believe you need to carry a diagnosis to be trans. C because if you're willing to cry and scream to get your way you're willing to lie too. I used to be like you, I've played this game.

> you aren't a poor child

I never said i was? That was a comparison. You must be either dim or completely unable to read context clues to come to the conclusion that i made that claim-

> Which you stated in your YouTube video

Lemme get this straight, you are so pissed, so mentally unstable that not only did you troll my server, send super long messages to the mods, and send THREE 3 (•••) super long asks, but you also stalked my YouTube channel and got pissy over there? Jesus man. Get your issues under control.

> Your LGBT 101 series was wrong and you should have used inclusionist points blah blah blah

I used to be an inclusionist. I know that stuff is incorrect. Not only this, but if anyone wants to know the inclusionist set of beliefs i have an breakdown of that on my Discourse Academy series that breaks inclusionist and exclusionist beliefs down. I stated in the beginning that my beliefs are not everyone's. If they want to see other people's beliefs they can literally go to every other lgbt education channel. Which are almost all explicitly inclusionist.

> behavior that demeans, humiliates, or intimidates a person

• demeans

- name calling, personal attacks, homophobia, transphobia, acephobia

• humiliates

- name calling, personal attacks against members

• intimidates

- horrible statements that all of us associate with actual conservatives who have harmed us in the past. Which you would not do to other LGBT people if you had experienced because you would know what that feels like.

>I do not care... ...I cared because I was making an impact and was angry

You did not make an impact, you looked like a screaming monkey to everyone else involved.

You clearly did care because you send THREE (3) {•••} Novel long asks, which i know because you referenced the radmed one, you looked through my entire YouTube channel, send novel long messages to all of the mods for muting you for saying fucked shit, and you went out of your way to troll because you can't get your shit in order.

You are being a hypocrite by making this statement as you directly contradict yourself in literally the next sentence.

> you told me to get some help but I can't do that before I can't afford it

If you can't afford therapy than maybe you should think before doing something that clearly shows you need therapy. You can always check into an ER and they can send you to a mental hospital. Normally medicaid covers those.

This is not a brag. This is you displaying your complete lack of self control, and obsessive behavior, as well as a lack of anger management. You need to see a therapist. I promise you there are places in your area that do it for free or very cheap. If you don't want to go to a therapist you don't like, have you considered you don't like the therapist because they're breaking down your bad behavior?

Ps. I know you're angry because no calm or rational person sends an anonymous ask this long

Everyone else... This little guy is such a riot huh? It's hilarious honestly, I'm gonna see if he left any mean comments on my YouTube videos.

[junjiie]

okay so i was thinking bc i wanna write for all my biases (i have like 5 it should be easy..) and so i was thinking of one for minghao & jongseob

so minghaos i was thinking like college au where hao & reader are like PERFECT together. they push eachother but in the best way possible. their friends absolutely adore them. hao is a photographer / painter, reader is a singer / producer (?? idrk maybe like english major reader methinks) one day hao gets this AMAZING offer to shoot for this magazine that finds up and coming photographers. they both know this is a huge deal because SO MANY photographers that have shot for this magazine have gone onto shoot for even bigger ones like vouge, elle, all the big ones. they know this is a great opportunity for minghao but they also know that if this really is a successful shoot hao will get so many more opportunities and they might not make it together with all the moving around. hao does NOT want to leave reader but reader insists that this shoot is a once in a lifetime opportunity and he needs to take it. they come to a spot where they both understand that they love eachother and won't stop loving eachother but they need to part ways at the moment and agree if they really are meant for eachother they will find eachother again, one way or another. their parting is very bittersweet and tearfilled they agree to update eachother and still be friends as well as let eachother know where they are incase they end up in the same place.

thinking about making the draft for it like tmr LMFAO

ok jongseobs idrk yet.. i was thinking idol fanboy jongseob AND reader like they both fanboy over eachother publicly and fans r BEGGING for ynseob interactions... jongseob is a producer but he's like lacking ideas aka looking for a muse. ofc before he used idols he liked or looked up to so reader was used maybe once or twice very vaguely when he actually has inspiration n ideas but now he can't think of anything. BUT during promotions at mubank or smt they meet and become friends and do challenges tgt and fans r foaming at the mouth like they NEED more.. i think this one is gna be silly funny unless i can think of anything to make it sad.. there might be some miscommunication (??) anw blah blah blah they talk queue piwon teasing jongseob and readers friends teasing them they sneak out at like 2 am to get like ramyeon or smt and they both confess at the same time like the sillies they r and then happily ever after theyre in love

ok anw this was so long but pls enjoy <3 now i need one for beomgyu :3 (i might have his idea too)

WAIT THATS SUCH A GOOD IDEA ? i think i have too many for that ☠️ IM EATING THESE UPPP UR SO GOOD 🗣️ how do u do it fr

MINGHAOO 🙁 yes i love the idea of rdr being a producer Hello.. AND STOP THE ENDING IM CRYING ALR 😢 timeskip like four or five yrs after hao’s left to do his thing when they’re catching up over coffee still feeling those sparks from when they were younger and in love let me explode 🙁🙁 that is so good like actually

SEOB MY SILLIEST GUY 😢 biggest hype men for eo without ever actually meeting LMAO 😭 AND IMAGINING THEM BOTH NERVOUS ASL AT MUBANK OLEKASEE THEY’RE SO CUTE . i am one of the fans crying screaming begging for more ynseob interaction i ac have a fan account alr like.. MISCOMMUNICATION STOPPP THATS THE MOST ANNOYING THING EVER 😭 i’ll put up with it if its for u though bsf dw 💕 AND THE CONFESSION HRDLPP THEY R SOOO!!!!!

these were Amazing i love u and ur brain theyre so GOOODDDD i love them. MUAHHH 5 STARS ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[thefanbasewhore]

"aren't you tired?"

"don't worry about me"

With Geralt?????? Thank u ❤️ love ur fics sky

summary: geralt takes a job escorting a princess to her kingdom but over the weeks they have spent together, he's slowly starting to fall for her

content: fluff, princess reader, geralt longing for reader

paring: geralt of Rivia x reader

a/n: you're too sweet, thank you love 💕

join my geralt tag list - geralt masterlist

Geralt knew more than anyone that the deep, green backwoods were thick veins of foliage string from tree to tree, fog clouds a clear path which causes an abundance of moisture that pollutes the air. The air is filled with a certain muggy hair, it makes it harder to breath, both yours and the Witcher's hair starting to frizz.

Heightened senses allowed him to hear the stalking creatures surrounding them, waiting for the perfect opportunity to attack but the presence of the Witcher kept you safe. He could smell the dirty fur of said animals, hear their stomachs grumble with hunger and mouths foam with need.

"Geralt." You say, looking down from the saddle of Roach to where he holds the reins. Roach is a beautiful, strong and tall animal but the Witcher is a comparable human. After all this time you can't get over how considerable the Witcher really is. His shoulder rubs against your knee as he takes his protective stance next to you as grunting a reply. "Can we rest soon?"

Geralt hates the fact that this was a considerable route but after the last run in with enemies of your kingdom, it was ironically the safest way.

"Soon, princess."

The fog is so thick, it's nearly suffocating. It's cold, the wetness in the air doesn't not help as it burns your skin but nonetheless, a certain level of understanding and trust has grown between both of you. The Witcher has proven himself more than once that he does in fact have an undying will to protect and stay loyal to it.

With a sigh, you tap Roach's side to stop any furthering and throw your legs to get off and walk but Geralt's hand on your outer thigh hults any movement.

"I need to stretch my legs."

He looks up from the right side of your legs with a look of concern. Eyes softening as he does truly feel bad but the deep rumble of his voice is harsh, careless and filled with authority. "Stay on Roach, these woods are dangerous."

Slightly annoyed you huff and earn a stern look from the white wolf. "Everything is dangerous to you."

"Not the time," Geralt continues ahead with the reins between his grasp, "To be a brat, princess."

"I told you to stop calling me that, Witcher." Top lip curling into a snarl as he laughs humorlessly, "My father is paying you well and I am the future queen of the realm."

"Good thing you are not mine," Geralt looks up at you with a playful grin, "I am free to call you brat whenever I please."

It's a few hours later when the treeline began to clear opening into a field of green but now the sun is starting to set onto the horizon. Geralt had finally let you stand, seasick legs weakly follow but he decides to stop. "We'll set camp for the night."

About an hour later, cold hands reach out above the fire to warm your ice digits, Geralt looks worriedly at the purple hue forming at the ends of them. "Do you want my cloak?"

"No."

He huffs, pulling at the strings of his cloak anyways and draping it over your shoulders. It's warmer than you were but you don't get a chance to thank him, "Get some rest."

"You should come sleep, you look exhausted."

"No."

"Aren't you tired?" You question while gathering the hem of your skirt into your hands.

"Do not worry about me." He answers quickly, staring off somewhere into the distance.

"Why don't you sleep?" Geralt huffs, head falling back into the three which offers him support.

"Why do you ask so many questions?" Geralt places his swords next to him as he leans in closer to the fire. "Go to sleep, princess."

"Are you lonely? Do you want to sleep next to me?" Geralt's face flushes as he looks at you with confused eyes, "Sleep with you?"

"Yes, lay with me in the tent and sleep. It helps me feel better to know someone is close to me." The suggestion is uncanny? Something child-like and funny as he shifts uncomfortably.

"What am I? A child?"

"No, not like a child at all." He notes how shoulders tense, sinking into yourself as you silently give up. Sadness rounding your shoulder at the insult, "Like a human, Geralt."

Without another word you stand, not giving him another glance before disappearing into the sphincter of the tent. Despite the defensive nose to the air, you nervously pinch the fabric of his cloak between two fingers.

Geralt sighs, looking into the distance. Trying to fight the urge to get up and wipe the frown from your face. A battle between his heart, which after these past few weeks together, in its own twisted, Witcher way of caring has now begun to beat faster when you're around. The silent protector but his brain battles with keeping you safe, knowing that a Witcher and a princess would never be; it's forbidden.

But the Witcher was never one not to follow his heart. Without a second thought he's standing, making his way towards the tent and slipping into it. You're already settled in the furs, using a bundle as a self made pillow. He moves in complete silence like usual but surprises you as he pulls off his armour and slips into the furs right next to you. He turns to face you, amber eyes running up and down your face before stopping and longing directly into your eyes.

Slowly he reaches forward, using the pads of his knuckles to press against your cheek and continues down the structure of your jaw to where he pinches your chin in-between his thumb and pointer. His silent way of an apology for his words earlier. He doesn't bring it further - never does in a way to preserve his own feelings when you do eventually get home. For now he enjoys the moment of intimacy, watching as your eyes flicker close.

"Sweet dreams, princess."

Tags: @msjb2002 @mashtoncliffin @evaxxmila

@kmuir1 @itshamleth @tiredbeebo @rangotangomango @andreadea003 @sebastianstanslefteyebrow @bbrs-princess

@inglourious-imagines @catgirlumine

[elsecrytt]

-bursting through your door-

REJECTION SERIES?? HELLO??? The angst potential oh my god i'm salivating at the mere idea

Lucifer getting the full course of enemies-to-lovers troupe because he's a dumbass

Mammon?? Mammon being his tsundere self and cementing himself in a friendzone? YES PLEASE. After he rejects MC they are like "I love you but you and our friendship is more important so i'll be happy with what i have" Meanwhile Mammon "Haha please don't prioritize our friendship you're so sexy haha" DELICIOUS

And if i may suggest an angst plot point in Dia's part. MC thinks that Diavolo treats them like a Lucifer replacement basically "settling in" with something more achievable and rejects HIM because of that???

Barbatos's MC still harboring feeling but knowing that butler will always put Diavolo first and always choose his side if it comes to it? AAAAAAA

-coughs- Just thank you for a delicious treat, dear.

hhhhhhHHHHH IT'S BEEN IN MY BRAIN. SINCE FOREVER CORVIAN. MY GOD IT'S IN THE BRAIN.

You don't have to give it a listen but a big part of the inspiration was this one Florence and the Machine song - Shake it Out.

Basically, there's this one line that's just so beautifully delivered that made me 100% think about MC recovering from being rejected by Lucifer:

"And I am done with my graceless heart/So tonight I'm gonna cut it out and then restart"

AND IT JUST!!! SENDS MEEEEEE! So much pride on both sides! The situation with Lucifer just has me foaming at the mouth. Because can you even imagine?

Lucifer rejects you in the context of Diavolo having feelings for him; he's hyper vigilant, desperately asserting himself and his singleness/independence in this instance because he can, and because a relationship is the last thing on his mind with all these worries, and because really, some stupid human like you?

And then. AND THEN. This!! Stupid!! Fucking!! Peacock!!! FALLS IN LOVE!! Yeah that's right Lucifer you dumb bitch now you really did fuck it up huh??? HUH???

You accepted and respected his decision with all the grace he didn't dare pray Diavolo would, you showed him and his family nothing but kindness while they threatened you, you helped them come together and understand each other.

And what can he do now? What the fuck can he do now? He wants you so badly, more than anything he could ever have dreamed of, and he knows how badly you wanted him.

But do you still want him? How can he even bring himself to ask? The perfect storm of reasons to pursue you and reasons holding him back,,,

hnnnng I am SALIVATING all over it, desperate to know, but man it's not an easy write.

and mammon,,, u remember erin's fuckin. brothers experience your worst memories of them fic?

mammon's line “…And if I can’t manage to save ya, then make sure you die, got it?!” is so well delivered in that work it always hits me like a punch to the gut each goddamn time and it's SO GOOD

just that feeling in the beginning, you try to be honest and direct and open with him but he isn't invested enough, can't put himself out there, and you back off and try to keep your distance

but he just becomes a SIMP and he's so obviously in love everyone is kind of cringing but you're too respectful so mammon just has to fucking suffer because even being your friend feels like more than he deserves but he wants wants wants so bad,

riGHT RIGHT RIGHT CORVIAN UR ON THE MONEYYYYYY with dia just. hnnnnng.

the game really likes to build lucifer up as coveted, desirable, basically the 'best' and most attractive character. diavolo's been pining for him for literal millennia.

like, because dia couldn't get him, he's going to settle for you? are you supposed to believe he's over luci? you're a human, you're a nobody compared to him, how could you ever compare?

just hnnnng. diavolo giving himself problems that no amount of power will dig him out of. there are SO MANY ways it could go and it's honestly just. delicious.

and the angst with barbatos,,, literally top tier and tbh like whenever i think of any barb shipping content in a serious context it's what comes up. will barb's greatest loyalty always be to dia? why is he like that? what would it take to change him?

hnnng. just. AUGH. IT'S SO ANGSTY AND SO FULL OF POTENTIAL AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH AND THANK YOU FOR CHEERING ME ON!! It's so sweet to hear ppl liking it because,, god does the idea get my engines going aaAAAAAAHHHH hnnnnghhhhh <3

[brown-little-robin]

17: R2D2

part one | previous | next | masterlist | ao3

Max gets up early and bakes muffins for Helen.

In the past few years, he’s dedicated much more time to relationships. Oh, he still goes out as Max Mercury; he could never give that up. But it’s seeming more and more essential, as he ages, to spend time with the people he loves. To give something of himself to them while he’s still with them in the body.

It was devastating for Bart and Helen, losing him for that hectic two years. Max came back to a bereaved, lonely, confused son and daughter. He won’t let that happen again. Not that he won’t leave them eventually—the call of the speed force is stronger and stronger every year—but he won’t go and leave them without support, without an understanding of himself. And he’s been doing… better. He’s mellowed, in his old age. He’s better at these little acts of love, like the muffins and the texting or meeting Bart outside every morning and asking about his day. He’s better at being open.

And now there’s Thad.

And oh, Max loves him fiercely. It’s not like this with the rest of the family. Max can communicate comfortably with them. With Thad… with Thad, Max doesn't know what to do.

It scares Max how deeply he loves Thad. He’s well aware that he doesn't have much time left, in the grand scheme of things, and the boy’s wounds run deep… but Max will not make the selfish choice to withdraw.

He slides the muffin tins into the oven. When he closes the oven door, the door and his back both creak. He sits cross-legged on the floor to relieve his back and fishes in his apron pocket for his flip phone. Only three people have this phone number: Helen, Morlo, and Bart.

    How are you?

The reply comes instantly, as always.

   :D how abt u ?

   I am doing fine. I just made muffins.

There’s a knock on the front door. Max laughs.

   They’re not baked yet, he types, to aggravate Bart. Then he comes to the door and steps out.

Bart tells him what he did yesterday, various rescues, mostly, and a visit to his old friend Preston. Max tells him about Thad and Joseph Wilson. Then, sensing danger, he warns Bart not to go talk to Joseph. Bart pouts at him, but agrees. He really wants the best for Thad, Max thinks. He’s been so patient about all this.

Bart takes a muffin when they come out of the oven, eats it, burning his tongue, and runs off with a “Seeya later!”

Helen comes out of her room a bit later. She’s wearing her bunny slippers.

“Ooh, muffins,” she says, and sits and digs in with Max.

The dentist’s office is closed on Sundays, so Helen gets to be home all day. It’s the first Sunday they’ll get to really relax together since Thad appeared.

It’s been a long few weeks.

“It’s funny, isn’t it?” Helen responds. “Thad’s not really much work at all, but it’s really hard to talk to him.”

Max groans in agreement.

“So… how did it go with Jericho?” she asks tentatively.

Max laughs out loud around the piece of muffin in his mouth, chews and swallows in a burst of speed.

“Actually, it went fabulously! Thad and Joseph really seemed to click. They talked and talked. And, you know, in that entire time, Thad never snapped at Joseph.”

Helen’s eyebrows shoot up.

“You mean to tell me Thad talked and talked? Our Thad?”

“Yes!” Max laughs. “Joseph drew things out of him I hadn’t guessed Thad even has opinions on. His major… he doesn't want to do anything in the scientific disciplines, apparently, but he’s undecided as to a specific major… He likes the way the oak trees move in the wind… his favorite animals are penguins and his favorite time of day is night… he likes the dark, it makes him comfortable… on the way down the mountain, we stopped at a stream and he told Joey about his powers…”

Max pauses, remembering. Joey and Thad had stopped at the sight of the stream, and stood for a moment in silent appreciation. The stream was well worth appreciation, wide and fast and steep, full of rocks that caused the water to foam, framed by pale flowers and oak trees. Then Joseph had started scanning the bank for skipping stones. Thad had picked his way out over stepping stones into the middle of the stream and crouched there. He’d put his hand in the water, turned it, playing with the current. He’d started to pull on the speed force then, for the second time on that hike, slowing himself down.

“What did he say about his powers?” Helen asks.

“Ah.” Max collects himself. “Yes. He was playing in the stream… using the speed force to slow himself down… and when he stopped to come skip stones with Joseph, he explained that he was speeding the world up so the current would be stronger.”

“Speeding the world up…” Helen murmurs.

Max nods.

Helen licks the last of the muffin crumbs off her plate and then just sits there for a minute. She has her thinking face on.

“Do you think… Thad feels like he has to control the world?” she asks. “I mean… is it about his powers, really, or does he think of himself as…”

“Responsible?” Max guesses. “Powerful? Maybe. He was trained that his value was in what he could do… so maybe it is just a way of thinking about the same powers… the speed force could, I think, give any of us the same abilities. But each of us uses the speed force based on our own instincts. He might actually be slowing the world down… relative to himself.”

Helen takes the dishes from the table. Max starts sweeping the crumbs off the tabletop.

“He looked happy,” Max says. “I’ve never seen him so… unselfconsciously happy. He was skipping, Helen.”

Helen stops rinsing, turns around, and stares at him.

“You’re joking!”

“No.”

“What is Joseph like, to have that kind of effect on Thad?”

“Honest,” Max says. “Thoughtful. Kind. He enjoys nature and people. I don’t like making assumptions about people from just two hours of interaction, but if he’s what he seems… I think he’ll be perfect for Thad.”

“Still, it’ll be sad to have Thad move out.”

“I don’t like the idea of handing him off to anyone else,” Max admits. “Not even perfect Joseph.”

Helen sticks the dishes in the dishwasher, comes over, and hugs him. He holds her tight, breathes in her perfume.

“I’m worried about him too,” she says into Max’s shoulder. “I feel responsible for him.”

“Me too.”

Helen says quietly: “I feel so bad that I didn’t recognize him as his own person last time… I think he wanted us to recognize him, really, but I never did. I… was too busy being proud of myself… thinking how much better Bart was, because of me…”

“Me too,” Max says again. “But, Helen, don’t be too hard on yourself. You thought I was dying. You needed something to be happy about.”

“You did too,” Helen says. “You needed something to be proud of…”

“I’m proud of you,” Max says. “I was proud of you. I was just blind… we both were.”

Max thinks suddenly of the clone that no one else knows about, the one who stalked Max for a while before dying of lung failure. His CRAYDL brought him to Max, but it was too late; Max couldn’t save him. Even Morlo couldn’t save him. His lungs simply stopped processing the air. After he died, the CRAYDL self-destructed, leaving a surprisingly small puddle of green goo next to the body.

Max gave the boy a hand to hold and a decent burial. He never found him in the speed force, but then again, he never looked.

“I really do want him to be with someone he can be open with,” he murmurs, letting her go. “I just… wish that was me.”

He laughs wetly at his jealousy, sniffs. He’s crying a little. He’s been doing that more, too, as he ages.

“Just wait until he actually leaves,” Helen says, sniffing. “Then we’ll both be bawling. I guarantee it.”

“We’ll visit him,” Max promises.

Max and Helen sit together in the living room, reading their separate books. By no coincidence, they’re both sitting where they can see the hallway, the door to Thad’s room.

Thaddeus gets up all bleary, dragging a blanket out of his room into the bathroom with his hair sticking up all over the place. He runs his shoulder into the doorframe as he goes in.

Max looks over at Helen and finds her stifling a laugh.

“Don’t let him see you laughing,” Max whispers.

Helen nods, still grinning, and returns to her book.

That afternoon, Max and Helen and Thad figure out Thad’s homeschool diploma for the ACT. Thad sits on the counter with his pale-blond hair sticking out of his blanket and tells them what classes they could say he covered. All the basic requirements of high school, of course, but also electronics, robotics, computer programming, and computer repair. For CRAYDL, he says. Rhetoric and drama. Max knew Thad must have had training in those!

Math through multivariable calculus and linear algebra and statistics. Nutrition, athletic and martial arts training of all sorts, obviously, biology and anatomy, specializing in the nervous system and experience of pain—Thaddeus says almost cheerfully that VR experience wasn’t enough; he had to have an academic understanding of the body to know how best to damage it. He pauses for a moment, eyes unfocused. Max tries not to let his horror show in case the boy thinks Max is blaming him—but experience in hurting people? Studying the experience of pain?

Thad abruptly continues. Chemistry, environmental studies, physics, forensics, all forms of engineering. Do you know that each of those are entire college majors? Max asks. I know, Thad answers. I just thought they might be taught in high schools too.

Max consults his list of high school classes and asks about the areas Thad didn’t mention. No psychology, Thad says regretfully; no English except high school level composition; no arts except the graphic design I picked up on the sly, no languages but Interlac and English because that was all Bart knew and they didn’t want me to slip, and only very… select history. I don't know how… accurate it was, either.

Everyone grimaces at that.

Well. The difficult thing with this repertoire won’t be convincing schools that Thad is a prodigy; the difficult thing will be deciding which classes to put on his record.

Thad doesn't see the humor in that; he nods and comes down from the counter to look at the list Max wrote out. He’s very small, sandwiched between Max and Helen. He points out the most essential classes. Max had planned to ask for more details, but by the time Thad gets through the list again he’s rubbing his eyes.

Max manfully resists the desire to hug him.

Helen asks Thad, “How about watching Star Wars?”

Thad looks up at her with that startled look he gets when people are nice to him.

“Can we—can we use the blanket fort again?”

“That’s what it’s for,” Helen says cheerfully.

Thaddeus smiles one of his strange lopsided smiles, half of his mouth pulling up and one eye wrinkling. Despite how alien it looks, Max thinks it’s natural to him; it’s Thad earnestly trying to express pleasure to Helen.

He wishes Thad would smile at him like that more often.

Helen goes to set up the movie. She invites Thaddeus to come with her, but he shakes his head, says he’ll come in a minute. He waits until Helen leaves, then turns his serious yellow eyes to Max.

“Have I done something wrong?”

“No, why?” Max asks, baffled.

“You’ve been acting weird today. You keep looking at me like I’m making you disappointed or something.”

“I…” Max says slowly, trying to come up with an explanation for his melancholy that Thad will believe. “I suppose I’m just feeling my age.”

Thad snorts.

“I’d say I’ve been feeling mine too, but I think that’s just depression.”

The wry way he says it breaks Max’s restraint. He laughs, leans over and kisses Thad on the forehead.

Thad stares at him, wide-eyed.

“Come on. Let’s go watch Star Wars.”

Thad follows him into the living room, looking at him like Max might reveal the secrets of the universe at any moment.

He grins at the title crawl: It is a period of civil war…

“This is the best animation you have in the 21st century?” he asks.

“Well, actually, this is from thirty years ago,” Helen tells him, then goes quiet because the movie is starting.

Thad settles in, laying on his belly, to watch. His face becomes rapt as he takes in the desperate situation of the beset spaceship. As the stormtroopers fire and fire and C-3PO and R2D2 escape through their ship at a crawling pace, Max keeps glancing down to make sure Thad’s all right. He’d hate to send him into a flashback. But Thad seems simply invested in the story, not bothered by the violence except to wince appreciatively when Darth Vader strangles the officer. He chuckles with Max and Helen at the banter between the droids and sighs in relief when they make it to the escape pod.

Max had forgotten how much of Star Wars IV followed the adventures of the droids. He starts to worry again when the droids are captured by Jawas and Thad grows tense. Are they too similar to CRAYDL? Thad seems… rather more attached to them than Max remembers himself being, the first time he watched this.

But the droids get purchased, and Thad transfers his attention to Luke Skywalker easily enough.

Max hasn’t cared this much about a motion picture in a long time… possibly ever, now he comes to think of it. Thaddeus is so enthralled by Star Wars that Max sees it with new eyes. Thad’s whole body vibrates when there’s a tense moment; he laughs out loud at the jokes; his eyes become soft and amazed at the vistas of the desert and outer space. He goes frighteningly still when he sees the burnt bodies of Luke’s aunt and uncle. Then he watches with an intensity Max hasn’t seen from him since he was shouting at the Thawnes in Morlo’s lab.

He doesn't say anything about it. He still chuckles at the funny parts. He booes Han Solo for being selfish. He cheers Leia on when she’s being feisty. But there’s a desperation in the way he’s watching now. His knuckles go white on the blanket whenever Luke or Obi-Wan is in danger.

Max is very, very glad that this movie has a happy ending.

The attack on the rebel planet Yavin IV. Thad groans in dismay when the Death Star appears. Max hisses, unreasonably tense. He knows there’s a happy ending; he’s seen it; but Thad’s heart is beating so fast it’s making him nervous.

Luke, climbing into his spaceship, says: “That little droid and I have been through a lot together. You okay, R2?” and Thad’s shoulders hunch defensively as R2 beeps a confirmation to Luke.

Now Max is sure he’s thinking of CRAYDL.

Midway through the rebel offensive on the Death Star, Max has had enough of sitting alone. He reaches over and takes Thad’s hand, matching its vibrations. He untangles it from the blanket and slots his fingers between Thad’s. Thad looks at him briefly, startled, then squeezes Max’s hand like a lifeline. Like a live electrical wire.

When the first shots fail to destroy the Death Star, Thad bursts out: “No! Really?”

Helen says, “Really.”

Thad scrambles himself hastily into a sitting position and reaches blindly for Helen. She takes his hand, and he stops vibrating so that she can touch him. And then they’re a chain of people anxiously watching Luke barrel down the shaft, Darth Vader in pursuit.

“Come on,” Thad whispers. “Come on…”

Han Solo returns, and Thad laughs in delight; the Death Star blows up in a shower of sparks, and he laughs again, triumphant. Max lets out his breath and realizes that he's been holding it.

During the medals scene, Helen asks what Thad thought of the movie.

“I—” Thad shakes his head. “Never saw anything like that before.”

“There are two more,” Helen says. “Well… five, but… it’s complicated.”

“I don’t know how they could live up to that.”

“They’re even better,” Helen assures him.

Thad lets go of their hands and rolls onto his back, staring at the top of the blanket fort with his hands resting on his stomach.

Max says, “Who’s your favorite, out of the trio?”

“Leia,” Thad says immediately.

Max chuckles. “Well, I knew it wasn’t Han!”

Thad smirks.

“Luke’s fine. Just… a little… I don’t know. He wasn’t as interesting as Leia.”

“Leia’s more feisty,” Helen says.

“Yeah.”

“Chewy’s my favorite,” Helen says.

Thad grins. Max laughs at her. She sticks her tongue out at him.

When Max looks back to Thaddeus, he’s gone. Mentally. Off to whatever place his mind goes when he gets amnesia. He’s still staring at the blanket roof, and his mouth is still shaped in the remnants of a grin, but… something about his eyes. He’s not at home.

Helen reaches to touch him, and Max pushes her arm away at speed.

“Ow! What?!”

Quietly, Max tells her, “Last time you touched him like this, you were lucky.”

Helen’s grimacing at him, holding her arm, offended and in pain. It hurts to be touched at high speed.

“Listen,” he says, dead serious. “I know you don’t feel like it, but all speedsters are deadly, okay? Have you seen Thad flinch?”

“No?”

“Yes you have. When he ends up across the room with his fists up, that’s a flinch. We’re just lucky he has enough control or enough fear that his flinches haven’t involved lashing out. Yet.”

Helen’s eyes grow wide.

“I’m sorry for pushing your arm so fast,” Max adds. “I was… worried.”

“That’s okay.”

They’re silent for a while. The credits scroll by. The dvd returns to the starting screen. Helen returns them to the start of the credits and pauses it there.

Thaddeus blinks awake and frowns at the blanket roof.

“My neck’s stiff.”

“You were gone about ten minutes,” Max tells him. “But you didn’t miss any of the movie.”

He makes a disgusted noise. Helen pushes play, and they watch the credits for a minute.

Thad says, “R2D2’s a lot like CRAYDL.”

Max and Helen glance at each other.

“How so?”

“He's a little droid, you know… a helper AI. And he's optimistic and snarky.”

Thad pauses. He looks far away.

“CRAYDL was like that.”

Max moves to touch him, then stops. He doesn't want to frighten him like yesterday when he took Thad’s face in his hands and the boy’s heart started beating like a trapped rabbit’s.

Thad notices the abrupt motion and clicks his tongue knowingly at Max.

“I’m going to sleep,” he announces.

“Thad,” Max says, but in a bright yellow blur of lightning, Thad ducks out of the tent and walks away.

Helen sighs. After a bit, she heads out to the community center for a yoga class. Max wishes he could go, too, but Helen is more advanced than he is, and he’s trapped within sensing distance of Thad.

Forget letting Thad go because Thad needs it; Max is going stir-crazy already.

The neighborhood is empty, so he takes a “run” around the house. When he feels tired enough, rejuvenated enough with the thrill of the speed force, he comes inside.

VIGILANTES BY PERMISSION ONLY, says a piece of notepaper taped to Thad’s door; MAX, THIS MEANS YOU.

“Can I come in?” he calls.

Thad is laying on the floor under the desk. For a moment Max wonders if he’s asleep, but he’s breathing too shallowly.

“Sure.”

Max comes in and sits in front of the desk. Before he can speak, a voice comes from the lump under the blanket.

“How did CRAYDL die?”

Max's heart sinks. They never told Thad much about the time when he was in the speed force. Does he even know about the other clones?

Carefully, he says, “CRAYDL… lay low for about a year after you disappeared. Then he started reappearing. Stealing… machine parts… looking for something… looking for magic, I’m told. I wasn’t around then. He contacted magicians and so forth.”

Thad makes no answer.

“He was trying to find you, I think. He was attempting to build a device or find a spell.”

The fingers of Thad’s right hand twitch.

“A t-hoop,” he states.

Max hesitates.

“Teleportation,” Thad clarifies, in that same distant voice. “It’s mostly machine, partially magic.”

“Ah… Well… He didn’t succeed. Maybe there aren’t the right components in the 21st century. But he… saw an opportunity, I think, when…”

Max doesn't know how to say this.

“Thad… the Thawnes… they cloned you,” he says. “Inertia… has continued.”

Thad doesn't respond.

“An Inertia came to the past in one of these… t-hoops,” Max says. The boy deserves to know the details. “CRAYDL tried to steal it, and he ended up fighting another CRAYDL unit. While CRAYDL was distracted… Inertia found your lair… and destroyed everything.”

“Inertia killed CRAYDL,” Thad says.

“Yes.”

Max’s muscles tighten in preparation for fighting an angry Thad down, but Thad doesn't move. He just lays there, breathing evenly.

“What happened to him?” Thad asks.

Max is confused for a moment, then realizes Thad’s inquiring after Inertia.

“He… died… trying to kill Bart.”

“Bart killed him?”

“Yes.”

Silence. The blanket rises and falls.

What can he be thinking? Max wonders. Is he thinking about the feud, thinking Bart proved the Thawnes right by killing? Is he feeling betrayed that Max never told him there were other clones? Is he thinking mostly of CRAYDL and distracting himself with inconsequential questions about the circumstances of his death?

How can Max comfort him when Thad struggles even to believe that he’s loved?

“I’m sorry,” he murmurs to Thad’s back.

He feels the inadequacy of it even as Thad’s shallow breathing stutters and he drags in a pull of air and says “Not your fault.”

“I wish I could help.”

No response. Thad is just a limp body under the blanket, eyes half open, one arm outstretched, palm up, and one loosely curled next to his chest. He hasn’t cried since the speed force.

“It’s so stupid,” Thad says at last, wearily. “All this killing.”

Max sighs.

“Yes.”

“How many of them have there been?”

For one selfish second, Max considers pretending he doesn't understand.

“Clones of you? Six.”

“How many dead?”

“Five.”

“And one frozen in the museum,” Thad confirms dully.

He knew? Where did he hear that?

“People talked,” Thad answers his unspoken question. “In the Watchtower.”

Max thinks back to the newly-healed Thad snapping defiance at Wally whenever he came near, thinks back to Thad asking over and over are you going to take my speed or what?, and realizes that not telling Thad everything right away was a mistake.

“Thad,” Max breathes, horrified at himself. “I’m sorry. I should have told you.”

Thad’s nose wrinkles bitterly.

Max doesn't want to push him too hard. Should he leave so Thad can process this without Max watching? Or should he stay and try to offer comfort somehow?

“Can I touch you?”

“…sure.”

Max scooches himself nearer the desk and puts his hand where he judges Thad’s shoulder to be. Thad tenses, then goes limp again. Max appreciates the vulnerability of this, that Thad is letting him touch him.

“I’m so sorry about CRAYDL.”

No response, absolutely none, as if Thad didn’t hear him.

“I love you.”

Thad shudders like Max has run a cold finger down his back.

“Sophos Thaddeus, I love you so much.”

Thad says wearily, “You’ve told me. Seven times.”

“Is there anything I can do for you?”

“I’m just… tired… I just want to sleep.”

Max has pushed the boy far enough. He’s grieving. He’s vulnerable. Max won’t make this into an argument.

“All right. Call me if you want me,” he says, and pats Thad’s shoulder one last time.

Thad twitches at the touch. Max quietly backs out of the room.

“I don’t want you, I want CRAYDL,” Thad’s raspy little voice says, just as Max shuts the door.

Max leans his forehead against the door. He can still feel the boy breathing in the other room. Just breathing. Once in a while, he blinks.

Max stays there until Thad’s eyes drift closed and his breathing deepens into the rhythm of sleep.

Then he puts on water for tea, hoping it’ll calm his anger at the Thawnes.

How could the Thawnes do that? How could they hurt this precious boy so deeply that he can’t even cry? The damage to him… Max sighs. Six hundred years, he thinks, waiting for the water to boil, and can’t even imagine it; it’s so huge a number that it ceases to mean anything; it’s just a number. Six hundred years. Six lifetimes. No wonder he’s so confused by love.

The process of steeping and pouring and drinking the tea does soothe his anger, but it leaves the sadness.

His boy. His precious boy.

[17wishbones]

Here is the FINAL part (3) of Chapter VII: War’s End! So glad that you made it all to the end. A rather bittersweet sort of sensation but, it was fun writing this to the very end. I so wanted a happy ending, but I still sort of followed Rengoku’s path and cried my eyes out again but it was worth it. Again, this one I know I could write better so I’m going to work on it. Thank you all for reading through this and sticking with me. This was just so fun to do!

- - - - - - - -

                                      Chapter VII: War’s End

“Everyone ready to go?” Tanjiro asked his ‘lively’ crew.

Zenitsu was sitting with Nezuko who was comfortably set in her box. “Yep, yep! Me and Nezuko-chan are as ready as we’ll ever be.”

“Finally! I can get out and stretch my legs!” Inosuke shouted with glee as he grabbed his two blades.

“Hope you have room for one more.”

“Oh, sure, we do-- _____, is that. . . is that really you?”

“In the flesh.” You stepped through the doorway in just the uniform. Over the weeks, you garnered a leveled bob cut of your locs, an eyepatch over your left eye, and scars littering your arms and around your face. “I’ve missed you all so much.”

“COOOOOOK!!!” Inosuke bum-rushed you into a hug, sniffling loudly beneath his boar’s head. “WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!?”

Zenitsu joined him, well, more like pushed him out of the way as he hugged you next. “____, WE WERE WORRIED SICK ABOUT YOU!! WE THOUGHT YOU WERE A GONER!!”

“I’m so sorry for up and leaving just like that. There was a lot to process after the Mugen Train incident, and I didn’t want to muddle your healthy minds with my emotions. I wanted to be mentally strong for you guys.” 

‘Her scent is still sad. Of course, she has a reason to be. She lost Rengoku-san, and has had to cope with that loss on her own. I know how tough that can be, but I have Nezuko with me still. She doesn’t have any kin or home to return to. Demon slaying is all she has. . . and us.’ Tanjiro’s eyes lit up. “That’s right! You have us.”

“Hmm? What was that, Tanjiro?” You asked.

“We’re a family, isn’t that right, _____?”

His words surprised you, and it made your heart jump with joy. You looked at all four of them as a part of your family. There wasn’t anything you wouldn’t do for them. “You’re absolutely right. That’s why I want to come with you. Besides, as a Hashira, it is but my civic duty to protect Kyōjurō’s juniors.” Tears formed in the corner of your eyes as you spoke fondly of him. “He was so ecstatic to have more apprentices under his belt. Therefore, I must follow in his footsteps and watch over you.”

“YEEEESS!! Having Cook with us will make traveling even better.”

Zenitsu frowned at him. ‘As if traveling with you has been anything pleasant.’

“Now, before we go. I want to see Senjuro. Did you relay the message to him already, Tanjiro?”

“Mhm. As soon as we got back, and when I was able to move. Do you want us to come with you? We’re heading through that direction anyway.”

“Perfect! Let’s be off then.”

You all travelled down to the Rengoku Estate, seeing Senjuro sweeping out of his home. He was caught off guard when you embraced him.

For a moment, there was silence as he held you back tightly, his eyes swelling with tears. Seeing him reminded you of all the times you spent together. The three of you were a team when you and Rengoku were training for the Final Selection. Senjuro, sweet and kind, had a quiet fire burning in him. He was going to be something amazing, just like his brother.

“Senjuro, how have you been? Are you alright?” You inspected him from his ember-tipped hair down to his sandals.

“I’m better now, after seeing you. You left in such a hurry, I was worried that you weren’t going to come back.”

“You’re stronger than I, Senjuro, and I wanted to be that for you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, _____. Are you leaving with Tanjiro and the others now?”

“Yes. I want to follow in your brother’s footsteps and protect those that I love and those that can’t protect themselves.” You knelt down, looking into his big, soft eyes. “I really wanted us to be together.” You said this, not knowing when death would knock at your doorstep. “I love you, Senjuro. I know you’ll be a great man in the future.”

“Mmm, I think I will be, too.” He hugged you one more time. “I love you, too, _____!”

You returned the favor before you both let go. You reached for your belt, pulling out a small box of goodies. “For you. Hope you like them. Take care, Senjuro.”

Your days, though filled with amazing memories, came to a close as you fell protecting the children. More than anything, you wanted them to succeed. Sacrificing yourself was the only way to win. It was a swift pain, a slow burn, and then darkness bled into your vision as your soul lifted towards the light and your warm, wavering aura vanished from your body.

You were sorry that you couldn’t stay as you walked halfway across the red bridge, spotting flame-tipped hair just over yonder. He peered over his shoulder, a proud smile spread on his handsome features as he held his hand out to you.

Over the red bridge did you both cross, fading into the distance.                                                          

                                       ( B O N U S - E N D I N G)

Summer had come and college was out! Most couldn’t wait to spend it goofing off on a beach, traveling across the States, or going right back into school a couple weeks later for summer courses. Many people had many things to look forward to, but you? You had woken up at the ass crack of dawn, taking in the morning air as you raced down the steps with your suitcase fully packed.

“Mom! Dad! Come on! We have to get the airport now! I can’t be late.” Your parents were so slow sometimes and that made you anxious. You could leave them here and catch a ride there or make it on your own but they were not having any of that.

“We’re coming, _____, we’re coming!” Your dad said with a mouthful of foaming toothpaste.

“You usually don’t wake up this early with this much energy.” Your mom added. 

“It’s not everyday you get to study abroad in the land of the Rising Sun! I have a day’s worth of traveling to do so I can always sleep later.” Yeah, you didn’t get any kind of sleep last night as you’d be spending most of it in the air.

You hurried them up and sped to the busy airport to meet with the group of classmates you were leaving with. You said your goodbyes to your parents, boarded the plane, and wished for a safe trip. 

As soon as service was offered, you grabbed a couple drinks, ate whatever they served in the trays, and knocked out until landing - save for the few bathroom trips -. 

Your horizon suddenly expanded the moment you walked out of Japan’s airport, looking around you in amazement. You had to keep murmuring to yourself, “Do not weeb out. I repeat, do not weeb out.” You loved anime, you loved Japanese culture, and you loved their idea of cuisine. Japan felt like the place for you.

“Okay everyone, please come together,” spoke your sweet, endearing Japanese princess of a teacher, Mayamoto-sensei. “We’ll be heading two hours out by bus to Kimetsu Daigaku (Kimetsu University). Rest up and be ready for a little surprise set up by a few students who were interested in meeting you guys soon after arrival.”

You internally squealed with glee. You weren’t dressed up for the occasion but who was going to tell you that you couldn’t wear a pair of sweats on the ride there. With your short locs retwisted and your good outfits packed, you were set to go!

So set that you were the first off the bus and getting your things out. “This is going to be a great experience, I know it!” 

“Nn! I agree!” 

“Oh my god!” You jumped, scared by the booming voice beside you. “Oh… oh my god.” You had laid eyes on one of the most unique men you had ever had the pleasure of gazing upon. He was different, what with his flame highlighted tips, dazzling eyes, and charming smile. 

“Yes. . .?” He slowly stood, his eyes never leaving yours once locked. This man, a vocal and expressive man, was left speechless. He ogled you for much longer than he’s ever done, going over your brown skin, your brown eyes, your short locs, everything! He immediately bowed before you, introducing himself. “Konnichiwa! Rengoku Kyōjurō to moushimasu! Yoroshiku onegai-shimasu!” (Formal: (Hello!) I’m called Rengoku Kyōjurō! Nice to meet you!)

Your eyes bugged out of your face. ‘Shit! Wasn’t he speaking English a minute ago? Okay, okay, what did he say?’ You looked back to see your sensei and the students watching the two of you interact. This was not how you kept yourself out of weeb trouble. Hell, you were still trying to figure out what his fine ass said so fast.

“Onamae wa, nan desu ka?” (Polite: What’s your name?)

You sighed, being able to understand that. “Watashi no namae wa… _____ _____ desu. Doozo yoroshiku.” (Casual: My name is _____. Nice to meet you.)

‘_____?’ He eyed you for a second longer before he placed his hands on his hips, smiling wide from ear to ear. “Very good, _____! I’m Rengoku Kyōjurō, and I am with a few classmates to meet you all. Welcome to Kimetsu University!”

“Woooow, his English is so good.” You thought. Aloud.

“Thank you! I have been learning since elementary! Your pronunciation is good, but your flow is slow. However, I am sure you will improve after being here for a month!” 

‘Oh, thanks for putting me out there!’ You smiled nervously. This handsome, wild man was nothing like you had expected. “That’s what I’m hoping for as I’d like to work, live, and travel here in the future.”

“Is that so?” He faced you with his arms crossed over his chest. “Be my student!” Your mouth, along with the others, dropped at his proposal. You looked to your sensei for help, and she encouraged it with an approving nod and smile. “Great, then it’s settled! You’ll be fluent in Japanese in no time!” He looked off to the distance, laughing loud as you smiled in confusion.

(Modern AU Sequel coming SOON!) - - - - - - - - - Chapters: I | II | III | IV | V | VI | VII (Part 1) / (Part 2) / (Part 3)

[mego42]

Hi, since you seem more positive/excited about the triangle possibility than a fair amount of people, can you talk more about why? I fall into "the not thrilled about the possibility, but have a little hope it could result in some good moments" group and would love some more reasons to not dread it. Thanks! And love your writing and love reading your tags :)

hey anon!! i am v sorry you are not thrilled and am always happy to shriek nonsense about why i’m excited (though idk how much it will help bc the tl;dr is more or less i’m hype for a triangle bc i am an incredibly messy bench who lives for drama and if you are not a similarly messy bench, ymmv)

don’t get me wrong, i super understand the trepidation, pop culture is LITTERED with absolute shite examples of love triangles but here is an incomplete list of reasons i personally think beth and rio are the perfect kind of disaster to set up a spectacular love triangle:

the existence of a triangle implies there are FEELINGS at the various points

the use of the descriptor "romantic" applied to said triangle implies ROMANTIC feelings

i am a simple woman and my pulse has already picked up

one of my absolute most favorite things about the toxic stew that is beth and rio is how completely balls to the wall obsessed they are with having and holding each other’s attention and focus

like straight up possessive nightmare people

now imagine wedging an actual rival for one or the other’s attention between the two of them

(something we have not reeeeeally seen before, 206 withstanding and i’ll come back to that, bc lbr beth doesn’t give a fck about dean and rio’s known that for sure ever since he walked LITERALLY RIGHT PAST THE GUY to rail his wife in a public bathroom at her invitation)

(the 204 proximity point has nothing to do with this list it’s just a source of endless delight and that was enough for me to justify adding it)

where was i

mmmmm feelings, possessive nightmares, OH RIGHT

they are also nightmares in the sense that it appears to be physically impossible for them to use their words with each other unless it’s like, ripped out of them which means they’re sitting on ALL THE BAGGAGE between them and it’s just stewing and boiling and

wait, let me back up

look, i want brio sex as bad as the next person

but even more than brio sex? i want them to fight

i mean like, Fight fight

i want the kind of knockdown drag-out brawl that brings Stuff to the surface and leaves them with a bunch of nasty, ragged, pieces dragged out into the light bc lbr they’ve both done some incredibly awful things to each other

(kind of like what 213 was looking like before it all went to shit tbh)

(i’m just saying, beth saying you put it all on me with that kind of jagged, disbelieving betrayal behind it? my catnip)

(it’s up there with rio at the picnic table in 306 telling her that ship sailed when she put three slugs in him)

i live for them being raw and honest and emotional okay

IF ONLY THEY COULD BOTH DO IT AT THE SAME TIME

bc here’s the thing, for the magnitude of horrifying shit between the two of them? i (personally) think that they like it because they are so! twisted! when it comes to each other and i love that for me, specifically

like no seriously a huge part of what i love about the ship is that whole i see your monster and it looks like mine thing they’ve got going on when they let themselves and i am full on foaming at the mouth feral at the thought of them leaning into that

i’m sorry i’ve lost the thread again

wait no that was the thread

okay so basically they’re both ticking time bombs of smothered angst and rage who are absolutely incapable of being normal about each other but are also keeping all of that locked tf down and the only time we ever really see it come out is when one o them is too emotionally overwhelmed to keep their iron grip

you know what brings emotions to the surface?

TRIANGLES!!!!!!!!!!!!

CAN YOU IMAGINE THE SEETHING MESS OF EMOTION THAT HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BRING TO THE SURFACE??????

AND HOW UTTERLY UNEQUIPPED EITHER ONE OF THEM WOULD BE TO DEAL WITH ANY OF IT????????

AND HOW SIDEWAYS IT COULD EXPLODE???????????

like don’t get me wrong there is absolutely no way it’s gonna be pretty but i didn’t get on this busted ass carnival ride expecting nice things, i am in this to feEl stuFf and nothing makes me feel stuff more than seeing the two of them feel stuff and this is  perfect set up for that

you know how they say the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference?

you know what’s not indifference? big messy emotions

but okay okay okay i am icarus and the sun looms large, lets say they don’t fight, that doesn’t mean they’re not gonna feEl stuFf on their own

do you remember beth’s face in the van when rio hugged dylan??? do you?????

and what did she do after that? went out and robbed him blind and held his shit hostage until he caved in what is one of my top 10 of all of their scenes

and god, idk if we’ve really seen rio really get jealous of attention lavished on beth yet but when i think about it i want it so bad my teeth hurt

and i know i’m not alone here bc i have i think 3 jealous!rio prompts in my inbox rn

(i’m not saying i’m working on it but i’m also not not saying it)

god i just

can you imagine how much fun it could be to watch rio seethe over having to watch someone else be into beth

WHAT WOULD HE DO?????????

ESP IF HE COULDNT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT DIRECTLY BC ITS SOMEONE HE CAN’T INTERFERE WITH

oh christ and if beth responded to it??????????

oh gOD thE mESS

idk even if it doesn’t lead to a confrontation (but i feel like??? it would have to????) just the idea of the kinds of feelings they’d have to grapple with and confront within themselves is D E L I C I O U S

also, to jump back to an earlier point: brio sex

i know some people are feeling like the sexy chemistry between beth and rio is lacking this season

you know what’s great for chemistry? fuel

you know what provides great fuel? messy emotional situations that tug at intimate connections and make people feel out of control

you know what’s a messy emotional situation that tugs at intimate connections and make people feel out of control? 

you probably guessed it

A TRIANGLE

(and we know that neither of them does well with feeling out of control period at all even without the intimate emotional stuff mixed in so like oh boy)

listen i am just saying given where they’re currently at with each other i cannot think of any situation more ripe for an explosive hook up than one or both of them feeling driven to reassert their claim/mark on the other 

would it be nice? no, probably not

would i care? not even a little bit

(don’t you judge like any of y’all are any better than me)

look. to quote marie kondo horrifically out of context: i love mess and the mess potential in a romantic love triangle with beth and rio as two of the three points is stratospherically high.

[honoredbastard]

ෆ self indulgent and entilted

characters — bonten!rindou haitani  + *yakuro nanami (oc) .

content and warnings   — mentions of drugs ( yo sanzu ), clubbing, stalker mention, mention(s) of drugging, yelling, angst(?), swearing, and so on.

note  — sorry for the dark content hhhhh, it came with the idea of ackerman being a yakuza that hated bonten and wanted yakuro gone. it may actually be apart of the fic i’m outlining..... these men hold my heart and WILL NOT LET GO OF IT. also they just like dive into my brain 24/7. help i had a fit over what looked best for three hours- at this point i’mma probably make a lil sum’ for sanzu. i love this man and i can’t stop having him appear in my stories that involve bonten. like this guy is 24/7 in the back of my mind.

                                         *Yakuro Nanami.                                            he/they/bun! 

                  Now playing ayanami  — by satin

rindou woke up first to yakuro wearing his bunny ears and a bunny pajama set that he seemed to just slip on before marching into bed. it was cute, but there was still smudges of makeup on his face and the dark circles of terrible inconsistent sleep. rindou sighed, brushing away blonde parts of hair that yakuro was chewing on. 

“yakuro.” rindou lightly pushed yakuro’s shoulder, trying to wake the boy in his semi bunny work attire. “rindou? rindou....” yakuro groaned, his head searched for rindou’s lap or hand that he could lean into. just exist near, to feel his skin and be aware of his warmth, that he was alive and not dead. that he stayed the whole night. “morning doll.” rindou smiled quietly, brushing his fingers over the boy’s hair. 

there was a knock on the door, “come in” as if that was a full offer to entangle himself with the couple he busted through the door and made a running start to jump onto the couple. “HI!” “i don’t do the touching, i’ll sit and pour you your drink and be your personal bunny. please treat the bunny well and we will have no problems. if they bunny feels uncomfortable the bunny has full rights to leave and find a new client. if you understand these rules please enjoy your bunny.”

yakuro stated as if he was at work. it was grilled into his brain and always had to repeat it infront of new clients. working at a bunny suit club was not it, almost rolling over onto sanzu. “bad work day?” “bad work day.” rindou confirmed sanzu’s suspicions with three simple  words. “yaku..” “no.” “yakuuu.” sanzu scooted in between the two, poking yakuro’s cheeks aggressively. he seemed sober, thank god. 

rindou shrugged the mans presence off and trudged to the bathroom to wash and whatnot. “you have another shift, ran told me to wake you up. “that’s not my problem. tell my boss to go fuck himself with a dildo filled with nails.” sanzu’s eyes widened, that was aggressive. although at the same time sorta funny?

“he said he’d cut off your shift times and cut back on how much money you make plus tips.” sanzu repeated what ran had informed him of, with a quite frustrated appearance.  “THAT FUCKER WILL NOT!” raising up from his laying position, yakuro ran into the hallway stumbling here and there from improper pace. 

“i’d love to see him try i swear if he even tries reducing my pay i’ll quit the whole fucking job how about that? i never liked this bullshit bunny shit anyways, it’s annoying when the customers try to touch and then you get stalkers.” yaku was mumbling to hell and back from his bosses call, waving to ran who nodded. making himself a bento before heading off on a small mission.

yaku threw open the washroom door and started searching for his bunny suit attire. the club’s theme was rainbow today so he washed a deep red suit with a black add-on tail and clip on black ears (which were foldable too. yakuro always folds one ear.) when yakuro made it back to his room, sanzu was gone and rindou was crouching near the bottom drawer.

“whatcha lookin for?” yakuro asked curiously, sitting beside the man who made a mess beside him “looking for a red suit now, i’m trying to match with you subtly.” cute- that was the only thinking yaku could think of this man who is a part of a criminal organization/gang. who woulda thought?

“i think you might be better with either a red with black tie or a deeper red of a suit.” yakuro suggested, getting up from his sitting position, joints cracking. “or black would go well, after all i’m only wearing red heel, a red body suit, and red makeup. the rest is black!” yakuro called out to rindou who was still crouched as he exited the room. taking into account his suggestions, he went with a more black with red accents attire.

           ާlocation, bunny palace! ෆ             late night, 11pm.

“here in bunny palace we have many bunnies to suit your taste! male, female, and even those who do not define themselves! run and created by the ackermans.” bunny palace is under the hands of those with the ackerman name. mikasa, the current owner, is softer on us than many. although the music blaring is not something you can get used to.

“hello! i’m moonie! it’s so good to meet you, are you new here?” yakuro was tired, it was about 4 more hours until he shift ended and he was already hungry again. salad’s really don’t fill you up especially when you wolf them down. his feet ached and cried out each time he took another step, he wanted to lay down and use rindou as his personal body pillow.... rindou! ‘i hope he’s okay.’ he thought, placing himself beside the very important client his boss claimed. “oh i am! it’s nice too meet you moonie.”

“it’s so good to meet you too! we have a few rules here that our bunnies tell each new client: i’ll sit and pour you your drink and be your personal bunny. please treat the bunny well and we will have no problems. if they bunny feels uncomfortable the bunny has full rights to leave and find a new client. if you understand these rules please enjoy your bunny. please keep touching to a minimal. do not force your bunny drinks or food. respect your bunny. is that doable?” yakuro asked with big puppy eyes, a big smile, and high pitched voice. “of course!” the customer happily said, hand already on his thigh.

i am SO uncomfortable was all that yaku could think about, his eyes flicking between the customer and each place his gross hands laid upon. squeezing every-so often like it was a pleasuring act for yaku. before he removed the man’s hand, he restrained himself. drawing a large breath before responding to the customer. “i’m so sorry sir! shall i get you something to drink?” yaku pouted, “if you’d like, moonie!” i’m saved.

yakuro smiled and stood up, “why of course! i’ll be right back!” like a breath of relief, he rushed to the staff room. he waved to some girls, “not on stage today moonie?” one asked, a baby stripper new to the bunny palace club. “yeah! boss was all: ‘act cutesy, be close, allow touching this once. there are really important customers here today.’ like thanks for threatening my paycheck and then saying that!”

“oh my, that’s rough babe. ackerman is always like that, it’s like she has a stick up her ass.” one of the older strippers that had been with yakuro since he started chimed in, “you’re right!” yaku chuckled, leaning closer into his vanity mirror to adjust his lipstick and have a chance to message rindou. 

40 missed messages. “i’m so fucked.” “why’s that babe?” “i may have forgot to message rindou telling him ackerman added hours onto my shift.” the room grew tense, “that’s awful? read his messages.” sei suggested, “might cool him off if he’s angry.

“alright!” yaku sighed with a smile, opening the messages. to his surprise, rindou wasn’t angry but instead worried that a client had gotten too touchy and triggered yakuro. after all, ran did inform rindou about the bits and pieces that sanzu did not tell yaku. “whew, i’m good! i’m safe. he’s just worried....” sei and bab took a loud sigh and began laughing. “BUT I’M FUCKED.” “really? that’s great! now go out! your client must be waiting.” 

yup the girls took it that way. “i will! don’t worry don’t worry. i just hope sanzu doesn’t buy the whole club.” “he won’t now go!” sei pushed out yaku who glanced over at the client who finished the previous bottle. his nose was red and was slightly swaying back and forth.

walking up to the bar, yakuro ran into polaris. “polar!” “moonie.” “can you get something for my client? he seems to be a lightweight.” “sure, i’m sure he wouldn’t mind beer.” polar sat down the cup he was wiping back and forth to keep busy.

“the bar isn’t very busy huh?” “oh no, it’s just we got our best girls today dancing and the waitresses and working ten times harder. it works out for both of them and neither of them have to fight each other about unfair pay. tomorrow you’ll be our best so good luck.” polar smiled earnestly to add to the words of encouragement, sliding over the foaming beer over the black marbled counter. 

“thanks! i’ll need it.” turning with the drink in hand, yaku noticed the man’s disgruntled face. he looked as if the whole world was going to blow up and he was watching the countdown. ‘act cutesy, act cutesy, act cutesy.’ it was a constant mantra in his head before he sat down and opened his mouth.

“what could be wrong sir?” yaku felt like rolling his eyes into oblivion, he could care less. “oh it’s just something wrong with the gang.” “oh my, a yakuza?” boring, yaku fake gasped handing over the bear to the angered man. “yeah!” he said pridefully with a chuckle, gulping the drink down and slamming it down. “something about bonten this and that and one of our men died.”

now that’s interesting. yaku felt like walking out to just go see sanzu, it felt like everything was reminding yakuro of him. hell even the purple lights were. but alas he was stuck eyeing the entrance while the man babbled on and on about this whole yakuza shin-dig he was in. he decided to slip off his shoes because the waitresses’ assured the man that they would handle getting drinks.

it felt like hours, drink after drink the world became more hazy. yakuro grew a high tolerance because of his job but he seemed to be losing himself while the client seemed more than sober. “you.. slipped somethin, huh?” the client beside him flinched, clenching onto his bag. “w-what? are you sure you don’t have a low tolerance m-mr. moonie?” the man stammered, through gritted teeth yaku managed to huff out a ‘whatever’.

“miss. ackerman set you up? thought so, the bitch never liked me because i have a bonten member for a partner. guess i’m finally leaving this hellhole. send her my best regards, yeah?” he asked with a agitated tone. his words were laced with threats, raising slowly. “mr. moonie?” “i’m leaving, i want to leave. i have to go see rindou.” he dug the acrylic nails that were done just recently into his thigh. fuck the shoes. 

whatever was in the drink didn’t seem strong but it had yakuro in and out of conscience. the man who was once his client seemed nowhere to be found, leaving a stumbling yaku to himself. sei noticed this and dropped her waiters plate, running over to the bunny who was just about to fall. “MOONIE!” 

          ާlocation, the bonten loft.             early morning, 3am.

blue eyes fluttered open, fighting the urge to close once more. “they’re awake! rindou, they’re all good!” a familiar voice echoed throughout yakuro’s head. his body felt numb, in an attempt to speak he noticed his voice was gone. every one of his senses felt like they were being drowned under water. his eyesight was the only thing that was significantly normal.

though his contacts seemed to be taken off, leaving the blue and purple hues of yaku’s true eye colour roaming free. rindou’s footsteps were heavy and had a quick pace, the vibrations went through the bed. “yaku?” his usual docile purple eyes were filled with worry and anger mixed together, forever burning until yakuro got better.

all the man managed to do was a weak smile, his eyes blinked slowly while he stared at rindou. the two conversed, rindou’s agitation growing as his jaw clenched harder with every muffled word sanzu spoke. “i am very upset sanzu, yakuro was drugged. AGAIN!” “we can’t do anything but sit it out! we don’t even know who it was. rindou you need to calm down.” sanzu too was frustrated beyong belief.

the whole loft was filled with tension that was denser than a brick wall. everyone considered yakuro a part of bonten after two years. he even got a bonten tattoo per mikey’s request. it lays on his right shoulder which he covers up during his job with makeup despite his hatred, it was the only condition ackerman gave him before he could work at bunny palace. ackerman and bonten hated each other, seeing a bonten tattoo at the ackermans would start a war. 

“he’s quitting that job and working at our club. this is the last time i’ll EVER see him like this again.” this wasn’t the first time rindou raised his voice when he was angered by the way yakuro looked in this condition. unable to move, speak, only look plainly at the wall with a weak smile here and there.

it tore him apart from the inside out each time, it did every member living in the loft. finally after whatever happened between those two. sanzu left, rindou left as well but returned with water and began to cuddle the numb and quiet yakuro.

[lune-hime]

Garden of Tulips (Levi/Reader) Chapter 4

~Click me for more chapters~

“What did it look like?”

“Hmm?” Levi looked up from his place next to your sleeping form. “The titan that tried to snack on my darling granddaughter.” “Ugly as fuck.” “Aren’t they all?”

Levi recounts memories of the reader and their shared life together while she recovers from a serious injury.

!!WARNINGS!! - Violence, gore, smut, wholesome content ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tulipa Rainbow Parrot ~ A tulip whose vibrant warm tones burst from deep violet petals like festive firecrackers.

↞↠↞↠↞↠

“Where is that frilly lass? We are already behind schedule.” Your grandmother exhaled and tapped her foot impatiently. Levi idly counted the butterflies that fluttered at the foxgloves planted along the polished steps he sat upon. In all honesty, he didn’t mind the waiting. The longer they lingered at the property meant less time for his anxiety to rear its ugly head the moment they left you behind.

The harsh crunching of dirt under boots collided with his ear drums as a young woman raced into view. She held fistfulls of her jade colored dress with one hand while the other struggled to keep the satchel on her shoulder as it flapped wildly in time with her pace.

“‘Bout time.” The old woman huffed, crossing her arms and assuming a position that reminded Levi that she was once a high ranking officer in the armed forces. The girl that Levi presumed to be Felicia skidded to a halt in front of them. Her ragged breaths broke the mid-morning calm and her erratic movements had scared off Levi’s counting material.

“I’m here gnädige Frau! So sorry I’m late, I was preparing some tonics for miss Y/N and-well-” Felicia was heaving and inhaled sharply before continuing.

“I dropped the first batch on the floor so I had to clean up the glass but the shattering of the bottle gave me such a fright that I knocked over the mixing bowl and thus there all my ingredients were now wasted so I had to return to the apothecary to fetch new ones and-” Due to her lack of breath, her excited explanation was barely understandable the longer she carried on. Your grandmother held up a hand signaling her to stop. Felicia coughed once and immediately straightened up, clearly intimidated. She brushed the stray honey blonde baby hairs that had haphazardly escaped their hold back into place behind her ears and stood at attention.

“Felicia, that’s enough.” The lack of surprise in your grandmother’s voice let Levi know that this kind of interaction was nothing new.

“This is Levi. I’m very sure you have heard of him, as has the entirety of the walls.” She gestured to Levi with a nod of her head. Felicia gasped, immediately spewing apologies for not greeting him immediately.

“Oh my! Captain, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” Felicia sputtered politely, attempting a deep curtsy. Her bag fell dangerously close to the ground as she did so and she just barely caught it when the strap slipped down to her elbow. She fumbled to collect herself and proceeded to salute enthusiastically, puffing her chest and looking straight past either of the other soldiers in front of her.

Levi shot a quizzical look at your grandmother who just shook her head and sighed.

“At ease?” Levi responded.

“Come inside, girl. It’s a shame that this is your first meeting with Y/N in a while.” Your grandmother turned on her heel and started up the stairs. Levi stood up and waited for Felicia to follow her, however she stood impeccably straight at the bottom of the porch. Levi regarded her with raised eyebrows.

“After you.” He stated unsure, arm extended towards the door. She squeaked and nodded vigoriously and trotted into the house, all the way her bag clanking loudly.

The creaking of the stairs was a prelude to the horrified gasp that resounded through the doorway. Felicia’s expression mimicked your grandmother’s when he had presented you in your state. The pure sadness that hummed along her features gave Levi a glimpse at what he must have looked like when he had seen the abnormal swat you out of the sky.

“Gnädige Frau, w-what happened?” Felicia’s voice crackled with emotion and her hands shook against the leather in her hands.

“Titans, that’s what. Her cuts are deep. I reckon she’s got some fractured ribs, too, based on her bruising.” Your grandmother responded. Levi stood at the foot of the bed, his arms crossed into himself and a hand resting at his chin.

“I tended to her most pressing wounds last night. But I’m afraid her body has gone into shock and she has yet to wake up.”

Felicia nodded, tears beginning to pool at the corners of her eyes. Levi felt a pang in his chest for the girl. You had told him many stories about her; her character painted with fond childhood memories. It was a surreal experience for Levi to be putting so many names and concepts to faces when you weren’t here to experience them with him consciously.

“What have you brought?” Your grandmother inquired, snapping Felica out of her bubbling well.

“U-um, some tonics, antiseptics, salts.” She sniffled.

“Good, good. You are a fine apprentice indeed.” Your grandmother praised and moved so Felicia could get closer to you.

Felicia began unloading the contents of her bag. Levi watched as glass bottles, their liquids a rainbow of colors, were laid out on the table. Her practice seemed more like witchcraft than medicine.

“Where exactly do you apprentice?” Levi asked, curiosity and slight worry about the extensiveness and obscurity of her collection getting the better of him. Felicia halted her actions and stopped what she was doing to properly address Levi, standing straight as an arrow.

“Oh! Besides being a housekeeper for the Vogel estate-”

“Hush, this is no estate. Maybe during my father’s time but now it's just a house.” Your grandmother mumbled while eyeing a thin-necked bottle with a foaming liquid inside.

“R-right, Frau Vogel. In addition to being a housekeeper for the Vogel family , I am also an apprentice at the local apothecary. Krovla’s hospital is constantly overrun these days, so I’m learning how to treat the locals here.” Felicia explained with a formality that contrasted with her scattered personality. Levi nodded in understanding.  

“Felicia, you don’t need to treat Levi like a prized artifact. He’s not your superior officer so stop with this saluting-bullshit. You’re the same age for Pete’s sake.” Your grandmother said, annoyance seeping onto her face.

Felicia let out a squeak and nodded slowly. She was clearly uncomfortable about casually addressing someone of more experience, even if they were the same age. While she was apprehensive about improperly addressing authority, she was not apprehensive about talking. Levi quickly learned that she was quite the nervous chatterbox.

“Captain, gnädige Frau, would you both help me set her up please.” She requested, giving one of her bottles one last inspection and a final swirl.

“Captain, open her mouth please.” Felicia instructed softly. Levi was sitting so close to you that his thigh almost brushed your forearm. Yet, he was afraid to touch you. It was strange, and gave him that familiar stomach churning feeling. How could something so loved and familiar to him feel so fragile and foreign? His thumb ghosted over your pale lips and with as delicate a hand as he could muster pulled down your jaw. He held it there while Felicia carefully had you drink the tonic. It was a painfully slow process where Levi fixed his gaze on your limp form still performing living functions.

“It is wonderful that she is able to swallow.” Felicia commented, relief evident in her voice. She screwed the cap back onto the bottle and discarded it next to her bag.

“Mhm. It could have been much worse.” Your grandmother answered. Her statement rang true but cast a dark cloud over the already damp room. Felicia picked up on this and cleared her throat.

“You know, Captain, when Y/N has been able to return home she always talks about you. She goes on an on and on about your handsomeness, selflessness-” Felicia adorned a nostalgic smile as she recalled your musings.

The corner of Levi’s mouth twitched upward into an almost grin. Damn, you made him sound like prince charming. Which was appreciated, but couldn’t be more far from the truth.

“I gotta say I agree with her that your height is very cute-” She drawled and then bristled like a startled cat. Your grandmother could not contain her guffaw and slapped the now wide eyed Felicia on the back. She didn’t have a filter, poor thing. Like a fawn with a blabber mouth caught at gunpoint, she was.

Levi cringed and let out a deep sigh.

“I-I mean-that’s not a bad thing...right?” Felicia was now as red as a beet and looked as if her head was going to explode out of embarrassment. Levi didn’t respond, only regarded her with the unfamiliar steeliness that scared many.

Frankly, Levi couldn’t give one single shit about how tall he was; or anyone for that matter. But the incessant declaration of cuteness by comrades and strangers alike never sat well with him. Like a fly ceaselessly buzzing against a window it cannot cross. Usually the teasing would be solved with force but he was not about to use that on your family.

“What’s with that look? There’s nothing wrong with being short, I mean look at me.” Your grandmother stated confidently with a wily grin.

↞♞♘↠

The glee of the capital’s festival bled through the streets and blanketed every corner of the city on this celebrated evening. Everywhere he looked was another smiling face infected with the festival cheer. Levi couldn't deny that even he was not utterly immune to the happy virus.

His good mood was mostly due to you (and being able to finally rid himself of the stuffy capital officials), or moreover his alone time with you. After the opening ceremony, which was mostly glorifying the military police while the garrison and corps were there to stand there as ornaments of the government, was mandated break time for all soldiers. You two had simultaneously ditched Eren and Jean when they started getting competitive with the festival games and swerved Hange when she got particularly excited about the fancy delicacies.

Your mood, on the other hand, had done a complete 180 since ditching your decorated uniform for civilian clothes. Your fingers pawed at the fabric of your baby blue dress as intrusive thoughts began to slither through your mind like the blindingly neon colored plush snakes that could be won as prizes. You weren’t usually one to be bothered by the opinions of obnoxious festival goers. Unless it poked at one of your deepest insecurities.

A hundred times over you had told yourself to not let it ruin your night out. That your obsessiveness was stupid. Irrational even. That Levi had proved your persistent opinions wrong many many times. But like anyone knows with a thought that was born deep under your skin and resides within your tissues, it's very hard to eradicate.

“Would you ever date a girl who is taller than you?” One guy asked, gesturing discreetly in your direction from their spot behind you in line.

“Nah man. I wouldn’t be able to feel like a man. She’s sexy though, so even if I was shorter than her I’d make an exception.” One of the others added with a charm only a teenage boy could find appealing. The rest of their party hummed in agreement.

You tried your absolute hardest to focus on the lively drum beats, the elated stomping of dancers, and the boisterous pops of fire crackers. Yet their uninvited snickers remained replaying through your mind. You attempted to present as unbothered as Levi passed you his corndog. He rolled his sleeves up to his elbows and gave his shoulders a few lazy rolls.

You were supposed to be enjoying the Festival of the Hearth, supposed to be watching Levi lose to you at the hammer strength game, supposed to be happily eating your coma-inducing fried food, supposed to not let comments like that infringe on your happiness. The mental strain of your last expedition paired with the exhaustion that followed official government meetings left you with a petri dish for growing your insecurity. You knew you didn't need the approval of strangers but it ate away at you nonetheless. The victorious chiming of the bell at the top of the game rang with such force that it pulled you out of your pity party.

“I beat you.” Levi announced and turned back to smirk at you. He accepted the plushie, a creature somewhere between a turtle and a duck, from the carnival worker.

“Yeah, good job!” You exclaimed with forced gusto. When your grin cracked Levi squinted his eyes in suspicion. He regarded you with the sternness of a scolding parent, gaze flitting from you to the group behind you.

“How you let other people’s stupid opinions drag you down still gets to me.” Levi looked up at you with light annoyance. His agitation wasn’t a stab towards you but rather frustration that you couldn’t let these things go.

“What do you mean?” You abruptly answered. The hastiness of your reply was about as convincing as a wilted flower.

“It’s useless to play dumb with me. Why are you listening to random brats? Don’t you do enough of that back at HQ?” Levi chided as he cuffed his sleeves, the plushie held securely in his armpit.

“Look, it’s not that big of a deal.”

“No, some people talk too fucking loud.” Levi added, voice like a razor blade. His eyes were a weapon and dug so sharply into the men that they all began to find the neighboring cotton candy machine incredibly visually stimulating. You then hastily pulled Levi to the side to not clog up the line for the game.

“I heard what they said and it shouldn’t matter.” He said as he traded you the food for the plush. It was soft to the touch and looked at you with cold but adorable eyes. Akin to how you would describe those belonging to your love.

“I know. It’s fine, I’m fine.” You assured, hugging the turtle-duck to your chest. You knew too well he wouldn’t pick up the bullshit you were putting down. But, eh, it was worth a try.

He deadpanned and held your gaze so intensely that soon Tesla coils were spinning in the space between the two of you.

“Come on.” He beckoned. His voice was almost too low to hear over the ringing of the carnival games. He weaved the fingers of his free hand with yours so to not lose you as he led you through the hustle and bustle. No words were shared along this walk, allowing all the sensories of the festival to set in. Bodies danced past you in varying frenzies, confetti blasted in sporadic showers from the rooftops, and the artificial lights from the carnival games swept you up and

made you feel like you were in another world. Only a passing hello was exchanged when you briefly bumped into Sasha and Connie in line for the baked potatoes.

Levi parked you at the boardwalk. Plump tulips swayed in time with the music along the base of the railing. The river was alight with wishing lanterns, each one of them twinkling like fallen stars along the rippling water. He unbraided his fingers from yours and gave you that electric look once again.

He turned to you already assured of the outcome of what he was mentally planning.

“Do you wish I was taller?” He inquired nonchalantly. He leaned against the railing and took a bite out of his corn dog.

You huffed, a bit taken aback by his question. When he regarded you with one brow raised, that half smug grin of his made it click. He was trying to get you to realize the absurdity of your worries.

As if you didn’t already know.

“Of course I don’t.” You pouted. The warm light that bobbed from within the floating lanterns danced along your skin, giving you an ethereal glow that briefly made Levi forget what he even asked you. He found your hypocrisy amusingly irritating.

Levi had no self-consciousness about his appearance, for it really didn’t matter to him. He was aware that he was considered “handsome” by you and plenty of others but it was all dirt off his shoulders in the grand scheme of things. The workings of his physicality is what was more important, not its aesthetics.

“What if I said that I hated myself because I am short.” He questioned again. The evenness with which he posed his question did nothing to hide his lack of sincerity. You stared at him like someone who knew they had already lost a bet.

“Well you already hate yourself so-” You responded dryly, attempting to divert the conversation away from your ebbing embarrassment.  Levi rolled his eyes and continued to wait for the response he desired.

“Fine. I would say that it’s dumb to think that way.” You mumbled, resigning to his logic.

Levi’s lips curled. The annoyance that had surrounded him before was dusted off by the soft eyelashes of the night sky. He ditched the remnants of his corn dog in the nearest trashcan and approached you so that only a few inches separated your bodies.

“I would never wish for something as trivial as changing your height. The fact I have to slightly look up at you is one of the most insignificant things in my life.” He stated, tilting his head gently upward to meet your gaze.  His sincerity struck you like an arrow and embedded itself so lovingly within you that it shot all of the pesky doubts right out of your body.

“I know thoughts can get stuck in that brain of yours but focus on what you think of yourself and not what a group of shitheads, or anyone, decides to vomit out of their mouths.” The vulgarity of his sentence made you smile and you nodded in affirmation.

“Thank you, Levi.” You said, letting out one last puff air to rid your body of the sour mood.

He grinned in return, blessing you with one of your favorite sights. Despite feeling like a slight doofus, Levi didn’t belittle you for feeling this way. Moments like these caused the kind man under the marbled facade to peep through and made your chest swell with even more love for him.

“Here, there’s one more thing I want to do to further prove my point.” He said, gesturing towards the wooden booth selling wishing lanterns. Once a few dollars were handed over, the woman behind the counter gave the two of you square pieces of parchment and a pair of quills.

“I can think of a million other things I would rather wish for.” Levi reaffirmed as he dipped the quill in the inkwell.

“Like for the titans to fuck off into oblivion. To make Eren’s asshole the only orphus on his body so I don’t have to deal with his constant screaming. To get Hange to stop asking me for my toenails. Fucking disgusting.” He muttered the last part with a grimace. His attempt to make you laugh had succeeded and his heart bloomed with warmth when he heard you giggle.

“For a bigger bath so we have more room to-” He began casually, instantly being shushed by your finger to his lips. With his lips blocked his eyes smirked instead.

“You can’t write that.” You interjected in disbelief.

“Why not? No one is going to see it. My lantern, my wish.” He replied with a shameless shrug. You shook your head and set down your plushie to start writing your own.

“See? No height changes on this.” Levi declared after a few moments. His sudden display of paper made you quickly conceal yours. Your eyes skimmed over the colorful, yet surprisingly lovely language that dipped you in a feeling as warm as the sugared glaze of the carnival donuts.

“You have a lot of wishes.” You commented. Granted, most of them were obscure and seemed only to be there to lift your spirits.

“This world fucking sucks.” Levi responded as if it was the simplest thing within the walls. You couldn’t completely argue.

“What did you wish for?” Levi prodded as he eyed the paper you held face down to your chest. You defensively folded it in half and closed it within your palm.

“I can’t tell you or else it won’t come true.”

Levi exhaled and pursed his lips.

“You don’t believe that bull do you?”

“I can’t risk it.” You said stubbornly with a playful grin.

“Tell me or I’ll revoke your prize.” Levi urged slyly, nodding down to the turtleduck on the table. You gasped lightly and scooped up the piece of fluff into your embrace.

“You wouldn’t dare separate me from our child.” You accused with feigned offence. Levi looked into those dark, synthetic eyes and huffed.

“We could never produce something as ugly as that creature.” Levi threw back. He had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from cracking a smile at your exasperated look. He would secretly admit, the animal was actually pretty cute.

“Well for being rude to your daughter you definitely don’t get to know my wish now.” You countered and picked up your lantern and began walking towards the river. You turned to look over your shoulder with an excitement that dismissed the family quarrel.

Amidst hundreds of other festival goers at the river Levi held your lantern as you secured the paper to the inside with yarn. After doing the same for him, you lit the candle near the bottom with a match. The delicate ivory siding of the lantern crackled under your tender touch as you raised yours to the sky. Levi mirrored your movements.

“Ready?” You asked. The two of you looked at each other with unspoken fondness.

“Yeah.”

Then, your chambers of light and worldly prayers slipped past your finger tips and into the cosmos. Two pairs of outstretched palms bid them farewell as they sailed into the galaxy to form a constellation with the thousands of other lanterns that peppered the sky. Those now empty hands were filled with the comfort of each other as they relished in the last few minutes of tranquility before they slipped into the crowd to regroup with the others.

↞♞♘↠

“Alright my girl, we are going to head out now.” Your grandmother announced, wiping her hands on the dish towel and placing it next to the sink. The awake members of the household had gathered in the kitchen before leaving for town.

“Right! I shall start planning out Y/N’s dinner and ours as well.” Felicia said with a determined glint in her eyes. Your grandmother smiled softly at her passionate response.

“Fine, but do not feel obligated to clean anything while I am gone. Although I know you will.” She instructed with a playful sternness. Felicia laughed bashfully before tilting her head in a bow of compliance.

Levi and the old woman’s boots tapped against the porch steps and down towards their awaiting carriage.

“Why don’t you just make her leave if you don’t want her service?” Levi wondered aloud. Your grandmother chuckled gruffly as she lifted herself onto the front seat of the wagon with youthful agility.

“As much as I grumble…” She began with a dreamy sigh. Levi awaited her reply as he heaved himself into the seat next to her, faltering slightly when he had to use his sore shoulder.

“I can’t kick her out because she makes the best schnitzel within these walls.” She confessed, her features glazing over in longing for the immaculately fried breading and juicy pork.  

“So you have something to look forward to when we return.” Your grandmother declared with a crinkle of her eyes and a crack of the reins.