#does all this make sense? most likely not. i refuse to reread it because it would just end up in the drafts if i do so and would not see the

[expectiations]

The Husbands of River Song is not and has never been about the Eleventh Doctor being a deadbeat, distant husband (gross mischaracterization by the way) and the Twelfth Doctor being the "better, more mature, affectionate" husband.

It was about River Song. It was about River and how the events in Manhattan took such a toll on her. It was about letting us see River dealing with grief the way The Snowmen showed us how the Doctor coped after losing believing he had used up all his time with River.

Looking at THORS now with The Ruby's Curse in mind, I get the instinct (for lack of a word that I cannot remember) that the Manhattan incident Blue Roach read from River's diary was not the Manhattan episode that we saw in series 7.

On that note, I'd also like to bring up the fact that the Doctor grounds River and River grounds the Doctor. As Tree talked about in one of her tags, River's empathy is more cognitive than emotional and after musing on it for a bit – considering that the Doctor can no longer go to Manhattan (which may have changed in later series but I wouldn't know at the moment because I have yet to overcome series 7b) and that River does spend time with her parents in Manhattan post-TATM, would the latest Manhattan incident in River's diary be the funeral for Amy? Amy's death? Perhaps even Anthony's? I mean, we already know Rory died five years earlier than Amy. So, knowing how deep River's love for her mother is, it's not too farfetched to say that River spent that time with them. River was by their bedsides as they drew their last breath.

Then Rory's gone, Amy's gone, Anthony's gone. Where does that leave River? Where is the Doctor? (sulking on a cloud on top of Victorian London? trying to figure out the mystery of his newest companion? all while constantly mentioning a certain Professor Song who actually turns out to be his dearly sort of departed absolutely beloved wife?)

Without her parents (and her husband) to ground her, she goes on this maddened, grieving space Robin Hood spree. She seeks fun to fill in the void and takes up marriage as a hobby/side quest. Does she look for the Doctor? Perhaps. Yes, actually. Considering she crashed her latest sort-of-husband's ship onto a planet where she purported the TARDIS to be.

But... she's stealing the TARDIS. She could have just called the Doctor, yeah? So, she doesn't want the Doctor to know then. Well... yeah, considering she has two sort-of-husbands in hand.

So, River would just have gone on from one space Robin Hood spree to the next had the TARDIS not sort-of-stranded herself on Mendorax Dellora to make sure her Water stopped being stubborn and reconcile(?) with her Thief?

Also taking note of how River has read stories about them and knows that Darillium is purported to be their last night together (I could also bring up the fact that this is why I find it easy to digest the "River meeting regenerations of the Doctor younger than the Tenth Doctor makes sense and doesn't break cannon nor ruin SITL/FOTD" but that would take a whole other post). Does this River believe her time with the Eleventh Doctor has ended? The same way series 7b Eleven believed his time with older versions of River has ended? Is this all part of some grand fuckup in communication all thanks to their tangled timelines?

Maybe. Maybe not.

But has River not just been running from her family's death? Has River been running from her supposed last night with the Doctor?

"But River doesn't run." Oh yes. Yes, she does. She knows when to stand her ground. She knows when to charge. And she knows when to run.

"That's out of character for her." No, it's not. She's not invincible. She's this well trained assassin, yes. But invincible? No.

Invincible from the tendency to be blinded by their emotions? Obviously not.

River lies. And River runs.

She is not afraid of her death. She is afraid of the day when her husband, her Doctor, looks into her eyes and looks right through her. And it shouldn't kill her but it does. It did.

So she ran and ran until her bigger-on-the-inside Mum gently reached out and put her back together with the only person left who could ground her. Who she didn't recognize at first but still fell in love with (and would have loved even if he hadn't been revealed to be her actual, long missing husband). Who finally found out their last night wasn't just any night – it was a twenty-four year long last night. Who finally gave her a breather from all the running she'd been doing.

And oh what a night that was (it was the talk of the universe).

[onehundredandeleventropicalfish]

so i keep referencing the What Broke Delirium essay i plan to write but never actually writing it, so let's dig into that one!

because. sandman does not spoonfeed information. neil gaiman even said this in regards to the tv show, most shows are written these days under the assumption that audiences aren't really paying attention and need things spelled out for them - but sandman is not one of those shows. you gotta notice everything to get the full story

which honestly i love in many ways because it's part of why i'm never gonna run out of sandman essays to write - every time i reread the comics or rewatch the show i catch something new

and this is one of the first hidden bits of info i caught - remember this spread from overture?

it's a fucking gorgeous page and one of my favourite in the entire sandman run, both for the pretty art and the content itself (i love delirium SO much)

but let's just zoom in on the center of those flowers for a sec

because there's tiny tiny text written inside them

(for anyone who can't parse that, the first says "delight was sad", the second says "delight went mad")

now i've mentioned in many of my posts before that the endless all struggle to experience their own aspect, they are that thing, it exists for the most part out of their reach, and that causes problems for all of them

but i usually leave delirium out of these explanations

and that's because, for whatever reason, delirium is the opposite. and delight was too. i don't know what it is that makes her different, but while her older siblings all seem to be barred from their own domain by nature (or have to go to great lengths to experience it), del is too much of it. she's utterly absorbed by it. and while i think she's learned over the centuries how to be a bit more flexible (she understands the coins have two sides thing better than any of them, and can be lucid when she needs to), she didn't start out that way

we don't know what it is exactly that broke her. but we know why.

she had spent all of her life as the personification of happiness and joy, and someone who embodied those emotions. she appeared most as a little kid as delight, because kids definitely find it a lot easier to stay in that perpetually excited, happy mindset

but nothing stays that way forever. and this is where she is like her siblings, and why she's so familiar with the coin metaphor - when you're missing a fundamental piece of being human (either by being barred from your aspect or by being absorbed by it), that's not sustainable. it will tear you apart. dream refuses to accept that this is the case, and that breaks him. desire is equally stubborn about it, and they've outright admitted (in narration) that they're hanging on by a fucking thread

but death figured it out, when she realised she couldn't fulfill her function properly without learning what it was like to live. destruction figured it out when he ran away to go create. and delirium figured it out the hard way, because as soon as the world got a little too big for her singular aspect to make sense, it shattered

and it shattered slowly

there may have been some form of inciting incident, but she didn't become delirium overnight. i think a lot about her describing it as "growing up, or at least growing older", because that's both a very mature way to look at it and also an extremely tragic way to look at it, the idea that she knows too much, is never going to see the world the same way again, and that means delight is never coming back

(and that realisation is when she stopped presenting as a child and started presenting as a teenager)

and i think for a while, early days of being delirium, not delight, she didn't know what to do with that. delight broke into scattered pieces and the more fell away the harder it became to connect them

but she's also the only one of her siblings who's picked herself up from that. and it's why she's the wisest of them. because from there she learned

okay, so her innocence is gone. so delight isn't coming back. but there's still parts of her around, if delirium ever needs them. and the more she observes about the world, the more she experiences, the more different pieces she gets to add to the puzzle. they don't fit together, but that's del's real strength - they're not supposed to. she could have tried to reassemble herself piece by piece, like gluing together a broken statue, but why would she do that? then she'd be exactly as breakable as before, if not more so

instead she's more of a floating amalgamation of pieces, or rather, she's the ties between them. and because there's no set puzzle, she can put those pieces together in any order. she's no longer susceptible to the same problems as her siblings, because she's not missing anything anymore. she didn't lose parts of herself when becoming delirium, she gained some

and yes, no one is entirely without flaw - her downside is she's still susceptible to strong emotion, and when that overwhelms her mind she stops being any kind of person, we just see that floating amalgamation, until she can calm down. but that's the worst of it. her siblings may see her as broken, but she's more whole than she ever was as delight. and she's never going to break again

[dumbfridge]

hey!!! if you enjoy varian and the seven kingdoms please stop scrolling for just a moment!!!!

so i know there are multiple fanfiction creators who have written their own versions of vat7k and i love and have read each and every one of them

i decided i wanted to join in on the fun and so i’ve been working on my own version of vat7k for over a year now

i’ve split it into three books plus a prequel and a sequel. each book (minus the prequel & sequal) have 22 chapters each. the prequel & sequel will have around 1-10 chapters (it depends on how long the written portion is)

i wanted to make my series have a similar vibe to an actual tv show so the chapters will be posted as if they are episodes. for example, one chapter will be lore based and another will be similar to a filler episode.

sadly, i’m still working on it and it probably won’t be done anytime soon but i do have a decent portion of it created. i have an idea for what to put into each chapter and am working on the details of each chapter. i’ve also written a few snippets here and there and here’s one from the prequel, After Ever After:

Varian’s pacing. He knows he’s pacing but by the Sun, he’s angry. For years, he’s wanted to know more about his mother. For years, he’s begged to hear stories about her. For years, he’s lived off of the small scraps that his father gave to him, only to learn that he has been keeping a key component about his mother from him.

His mother’s journal sits before him on Xavier’s table, a deep forest green with a symbol engraved upon it. If he didn’t know any better, he’d say it's mocking him. Just when he made peace with the fact that nothing will ever change in Corona, this journal pops into existence as a big “fuck you!” to Varian’s mental wellbeing.

Xavier has been watching him patiently, having already picked his way through the journal. Varian stubbornly refuses to be the one to speak first but Xavier is just staring at him, his eyes following the path Varian is making into his floor.

Varian doesn’t speak for several more seconds before he demands: “So? What does it mean? What are the Seven Trials and why was my mom so obsessed with it?”

“Ah, yes, the Seven Trials,” Xavier enunciates. He rubs his chin as a faraway look passes over his face. “It is an old tale but one worth revisiting.”

“Oh, would you quit it?” Varian snaps. He stops pacing and stands across from Xavier, arms crossed and his foot tapping the ground repeatedly. “I really don’t want a long winded explanation right now.”

Xavier chuckles. “Very well. I will keep my story short. The Seven Trials were a test made long ago by Demanitus himself.”

Varian’s foot falls with a final thump. “Demanitus? My mom followed his studies too?”

“It would seem so.” Xavier gently picks up the journal and flicks through the pages. He stops about midway through the book and turns it for Varian to see. “And it also seems like she got very close to her goal.”

The entry on the page is annoyingly vague. The main phrases he gets from it are words he’s already read when he skimmed through it earlier. “The Eternal Library” particularly stands out to him. He could have sworn he heard it somewhere before.

When he rereads the paragraph, though, he puts together pieces that he had taken for granted before. Most of it doesn’t make any sense because she’s using key words only she obviously knows but Varian gets the gist of it. She completed all of the trials and found the location of the Eternal Library.

that’s all i have for that right now

if you have any questions, feel free to ask

and if you have suggestions, i’d be happy to hear them! i can’t promise any of them will make the cut but if they do, i’ll make sure to credit whoever’s idea it originally was

thank you for reading! if any of you are interested i might be able to post more snippets of it

[rosetta-j-stone]

Buckle up guys, gals and non-binary pals, it's BoJere Tour Bus Renuion time <3

"...Bojan was tentatively asking me if I would join him on the tour bus" - Kris arches an eyebrow as he reads this part of the latest interview with Jere on his phone screen.

Tentatively? Seriously? Since when has Bojan done ANYTHING tentatively? Bojan is about as tentative as a- as a puppy. Which is why Kris has to watch him and "Nine Lives" Jure like a hawk.

Not for the first time, Kris is glad he doesn't have pets.

Turtles might be OK, he supposes.

Nace seems to think so.

Anyway, he's clearly going to have to talk to Bojan about this.

****

"Hey, Bojan, remind me: what are the rules of this tour?"

Bojan rolls his eyes. Like Kris doesn't know. Like Kris didn't write them. Like Kris didn't give him two copies (just in case). He shrugs.

"Let's see...what happens on the tour bus stays on the tour bus?"

Kris chucks a pillow at him. He ducks.

"That is the exact opposite of Rule 5 and you know it"

Ugh, he's in one of those moods. Bojan briefly considers throwing the pillow back, but decides against it.

"Rule 5? What were the other 4?" He grins. "Wait, don't tell me. They're all the same rule, just with different names."

Kris refuses to take this bait, unfortunately.

"Rule 5 is - as you very well know - No Sex On The Tour Bus"

How is he capitalising every letter of that stupid rule just saying it, Bojan wonders.

"Right, and why are you bringing up that rule with me? Shouldn't you be reminding...ooh, I don't know...your fellow guitarists of that one?"

Kris folds his arms and Bojan knows he shouldn't push it but he can't help himself.

"Or does it not apply if both parties are band members? Kinda discriminatory Krisko. Does this mean I have to start sleeping with Jure again?" He grins, gives Kris a suggestive look. "Or-"

Kris gives him a don't-even-think-about-it look in response - spoilsport - and thrusts his phone at him.

Ooh, it's an interview with Jere...

Ah.

OK, Jere has obviously said something.

Yep. Kris has highlighted it. Of course he has.

He reads the offending sentence, rereads it, laughs, looks up.

"Oh come on Kris, this is just Jerč-Jere messing around. He probably said it because he knew it would get attention. Although" he feels obliged to point out, because joke or no joke this slander will not stand: "it was actually HIM asking ME if he could-"

Kris sighs the deep sigh of the terminally exasperated.

"Look, I don't care who asked who, your boyfriend-"

"-NOT my boyfriend actually but do carry on"

Kris doesn't even bat an eyelid.

"Whatever he is, he's NOT coming on the bus. In EITHER sense. There's barely enough room for the five of us as it is"

He gestures to the admittedly cramped living quarters they've somehow got used to sharing. Bojan can see his point, even if he is making it in the most insufferable way possible. He sighs.

"FINE. No Sex On The Tour Bus"

Kris looks at him.

"Promise?"

He's such a Boy Scout sometimes. Bojan can't resist saluting as he replies.

"Yes, Mr-If-I-Can't-Get-Laid-Neither-Can-Anyone-Else, I promise"

And he runs off before Kris can find anything else to throw at him.

****

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: Hey

BikBik: Hey

BikBik: What happen?

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: Kris read your interview. I had to promise him I wouldn't smuggle you onto the tour bus.

BikBik: : (

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: I know, it sucks. No reenacting this for us

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: <video file: UKTourChaChaCha">

BikBik: <gif: "SadDavidTennant">

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: <gif: "SadDavidTennant">

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: ...

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: Anyway, I think we're both off Krisko's Christmas card list this year.

BikBik: ...

BikBik: OK but still on Christmas present list, yesyes?

BikBik: Still on track for visit from...Grandfather Walrus?

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: ...Grandfather Walrus?

BikBik: Is not correct? I put "Dedek Mrož" into Google Translate and-

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: OH

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: OMB

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: X D

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: DEDEK MRAZ

CarpeEveryDiemSlideIntoEveryDM: BRB DYING OF LAUGHTER

BikBik: ...

BikBik: ...

BikBik: F**k you Bojan X D

****

Jere is laughing as he puts his phone down, he can't help laughing whenever he interacts with Bojan, but he's soon serious again.

Yes, he ABSOLUTELY said that to that reporter because he knew they'd eat it up.

But...

He was hoping that he and Bojan would-

Well.

You know.

But Bojan has made a promise, and his Bojan doesn't break promises.

So Jere is going to have to...get creative.

He grins.

He's always enjoyed a challenge.

[spoookydoesart]

Please let me have this. The concept of Jervis is so good even though his comics aren’t…great…..and writing a Wonderland-loving weirdo as a Wonderland-loving weirdo just sounds fun. So, I guess you’d call this my…

• JERVIS TETCH Headcannons / Interpretation •

• ——— •

Jervis Tetch- or, the Mad Hatter- was a once respected neurologist turned criminal. Unassuming at face value, he creates chaos through his backwards intelligence and hypnotism, molding Gotham to fit his vision of ‘home’.

• ——— •

Jervis was a neurologist, studying the subconscious. He was lonely, with few friends as a result of his social anxiety and awkwardness, but otherwise lived an average life.

This loneliness would bubble up into desperation, driving him to begin his criminal career before he would dawn his alter ego- the result of an unreciprocated crush on his coworker. He’d inconspicuously use hypnotism to make strangers steal gifts to impress her with, the small scale and lack of traceability leaving Jervis guiltless. But eventually his crush would catch on, refusing his gifts and eventually demanding he never talk to her again. In a panic, he would hypnotize a group of bystanders into stealing a large sum of money, which accidentally lead Batman straight to him. Batman would find Tetch begging for the woman to willingly leave Gotham with him, promising anything she wants with the stolen money.

His intelligence and fondness for mind control would land Tetch in Arkham Asylum, which was more than a shock to him. Of course he knew he was risking jail time, but Arkham?? He didn’t think anything he was doing was THAT bad! But now, he was sitting next door to some of the Gotham’s worst villains, amongst their ranks! He could never live a normal life again…. He didn’t want linger on those thoughts, escaping through one of the few distractions he had at his disposal- a copy of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. He reread and escaped from the reality of the Asylum so often that it soon became his most important influence and, in addition to acclimating to his criminal status, resulted in the creation of his alter ego- the Mad Hatter.

• ——— •

Jervis is deceptively non-villainous- pleasant, soft-spoken, and chipper. He enjoys “helping” others, and has moments of ditziness and anxiousness. If you had met him on the street unknowingly, you’d likely think he was just a well meaning eccentric with his head a little too far in the clouds. He does, however, have an awful temper, and is also quick to shift blame away from himself.

Many say he isn’t ignorant to this perception, with debates whether or not he knowingly plays up his personality to manipulate others. Generally, the people who know his history don’t typically respect him, but also don’t put down their guard around him. After all, there is no arguing his use of hypnotism and mind control, and the wacky schemes that are difficult to crack because of the nonsense logic that only he finds sense in.

The Mad Hatter has two main goals:

Make Gotham into a Wonderland. Causing general chaos, really. What he means by this isn’t clear (perhaps intentionally) as his schemes can be inconsistent. However, it’s usually with two underlying themes- regaining control, and not being alone.

To kill Batman. Ooooh he wants him dead. Jervis blames Batman for the loss of his old life, and sees this more that anything as a service to the people of Gotham, protecting the “innocent” from having their lives ruined as well.

• — — — •

(Character Concepts / Sketches)

[personality-corner]

How to Avoid Mistyping

I’ve actually wanted to make a post like this for a while, I just hadn’t really gotten to it yet. Here’s how to know if you’re mistyping a character.

Mistyping vs. A Differing Opinion

When it comes to fictional characters, a lot of it comes down to interpretation, which means there will always be a level of differing opinions when typing a character. However, I do think it’s undoubtable that some types don’t fit characters at all.

At the end of the day, it comes down to argument. Does your argument make sense? Is it understandable to those who aren’t inside your mind? Is it obviously biased.

And here’s the thing- everyone has bad arguments. I’ve had bad arguments, even on this page. However, I am making this post, to maybe help people to think more critically about their arguments.

Are you grasping at straws trying to defend your opinion?

Honestly, this is a good sign that you are mistyping a character. Does it feel like you are trying way too hard to defend your typing of a character, like you can’t come up with any good arguments for it?

This could mean one of two things; you need to rewatch or reread the material you’re typing from or you need to consider a different type for them. Now, I would definitely rewatch or reread said thing first, because there have definitely been times I thought I was mistyping a character when in reality, I just didn’t remember enough about a character to type them appropriately.

But you should at least consider the fact that you’re mistyping a character if you’re struggling to construct an argument.

“This type would not do that!”

I do think there are times when this is appropriate, for example, when discussing a character’s actions, saying “this character’s interest in their environment really gives more Se than Ne.” However whenever I hear XXXX would never do that! It grinds my gears.

Usually, when people say this, it’s highly stereotypical, because technically speaking, each type is capable of anything… it’s why they’re doing it, what’s going on in their head that matters. Now is it unlikely for, say, an Si dom to make impulsive decisions? Perhaps, but it’s not that they can’t. In fact, some of the ISTJs I’ve typed have made very impulsive decisions when their Te or Fi kicked in.

Using your personal relatability to a character to determine their type.

Now this one, out of everything on here kind of annoys me the most. Now, there is nothing wrong with relating to a character and considering the type for them. However your relatability to them also cannot be your only argument to why they fit that type, because you don’t have to be the same type as that character to relate to them.

I’m an INTP, and there are plenty of ISTJ, INFP, ISTP, hell even ESFP characters I relate to. I also don’t think I’ve ever, at least not since starting this blog, have typed a character INTP solely because I find them relatable… in fact, it’s the second to last most typed on this blog.

Have you considered other possibilities for this character?

Typically, unless I’m really sure about a character’s type, I’ll consider at least a few types before deciding on one. I’ll keep these types in mind when watching something, and sometimes will decide on something completely different.

Obviously, you don’t have to do this, everyone’s system of typing is different, but the important thing is, don’t be so fixated on a particular type for a character that you refuse to see or listen to any other argument regarding them.

Don’t automatically assume a character is in a loop or a grip when you type them.

Now, saying a character is in a loop or a grip is not inherently wrong per se- but I will say, that I often see people use this to avoid typing characters certain types.

I have a post I’m working about on loops and grips, but I will say that if you can’t legitimize why a character wouldn’t be that type, even at their healthiest, it’s probably not a good type for them.

[deludedfantasy]

Trimax Vol.2

Hello! I’ve been lurking in the book club so far but I wanted to jump in the ring and add my own thoughts to the mix. Fun fact: I actually binge read the manga about two weeks, but read it so fast I didn’t absorb much. I’m taking this as an opportunity to read it more slowly and really savor it, and hopefully understand it a little more. My first experience was fun, but I was also a little confused by the end. 

I certainly can’t compare to some of amazing analyses I’ve read so far, but here are some thoughts!

Ch1

WOW. What an opening. This only gets more horrifying on reread. I was actually very confused the first go around because I thought Midvalley was the one shoving all those people in the trucks and squashing them and my knowledge of him from 98 did NOT fit this at all. It was a great way to reintroduce Legato though 

I’m STILL wondering who this giant person is that’s carrying Legato around in his Iron Maiden. Just another Knives minion I guess?? They got put on Legato babysitting duty

Ch2

Well, Legato is somehow more unhinged than before

Genuinely sometimes feel like Legato mauling that steak when I’m reading this manga though 

Love when Vash and Wolfwood are being stupid together. Also Vash driving is me when I drive

Vash’s ridiculous greeting Rai Dei is preceded by him having a Very Serious moment staring at the empty town. I appreciate the ability this manga has to insert moments of humor into otherwise incredibly serious situations without it being jarring. 10/10 great character and storytelling

Death skull rollerblades??? Death skull rollerblades!!!

I really like this panel of Vash, right after Rai Dei reveals he knows about the colony. Something about how most of his face is obscured, it really underscores how terrifying Vash can be. Every time something he loves is threatened, he gets very, very scary very fast and the way Nightow shows this is just amazing

Ch3

The cover for this chapter is on point

Not actually sure what Wolfwood is saying here? He’s going to help Vash…because the Gung Ho Guns are inhuman humans? They’re too determined and this will take too long? 

Vash acrobatics!! Big fan of Vash acrobatics!!

He just won a fight but he’s such a goofball about it

Ch4

“C’mon. Leading a normal life, it’s not so bad, y’know.” He’s speaking from experience and this line makes me kinda sad. He really liked it, but he had to give it up to do the right thing :( 

You know, for some of the backstories of the Gung Ho Guns, it makes sense where they got their abilities from. Like Monev and Rai Dei obviously trained for years and years to become these expert fighters. But for the others, like Dominique and Legato, I’m constantly wondering where they picked up what are essentially supernatural abilities without being plants or something. Though this may just be the fact that I saw tristamp first talking, since they do explain that there.

WHAT? How did I not notice Rai Dei had a gunblade??? My favorite ridiculous anime weapon

Also, uh oh Wolfwood’s done it now

Holy shit, did Vash just punch him?!?!

Hmmmm, oh yes, this scene made me lose my mind when I first read it (last week lol). Wolfwood trying to prove a point about making tough decisions by making Vash literally put a gun to his head and calling Vash a coward for refusing to kill and get his hands dirty

Unfortunately, it also confuses the hell out of me because it feels like they’re having multiple conversations at once and I can’t pick up on maybe more than half of one.

But!! The thing that stands out to me: Vash calls Wolfwood out, saying that he knows he’s better than this, that he wants better than this, but he’s so scared of hoping that he becomes a devil instead. I love how these two really see each other. Even when Wolfwood is kinda scared of Vash, he’s trying to understand him more than anything, and though he struggles, he does see him and get him

On a lighter note…Ahhh yes, the girls are back!! I’ve missed them the past few chapters.

Ch5

Oh no, Wolfwood’s dream :( It makes me so, so sad. He just really doesn’t think there’s any way for him to go back or wash his hands clean

The tone shifts are honestly masterful. Wolfwood goes from having a horrible nightmare to slapstick comedy because Vash crashed Angelina again

Gotta love that Wolfwood just dumps Vash facedown on that couch

Oh my god, Vash, you have a concussion, what are you doing!! Why did Wolfwood just leave him there on his own? I know they haven’t spent that much time together, but does Wolfwood not know him at all? Vash will get into Situations if left to his own devices.

Hmmm, Rob’s situation really underscores the argument Vash and Wolfwood were having last chapter. Especially his father’s line about not everyone being able to gamble with their lives so easily

Jesus, Wolfwood is terrified of Vash. I thought on my first read that this is a bit of an overreaction to this situation, but thinking on it again, after Fifth Moon and seeing all the crazy shit Vash can do, it has to be scary to see a guy who’s hurt and reeling and still manages to cause massive damage. So yeah, can’t really blame him for wondering what kind of monster he’s gotten himself involved with

But then he’s reminded…Vash is also just some silly guy who really likes food. Ah, the duality of man and monster. Again, the tone shift from Wolfwood having serious thoughts of fear and doubt to Vash being a certified goofball.

Ch6

The opening of this chapter is great. We get a little bit of Wolfwood’s backstory and start to understand how dark it is. Who shot him as a child? Where did he come from? But also, we find out he has a deep conviction to stay alive

You know, I completely forgot Rei Dei threatened the colony two chapters ago because for a hot sec I was really confused why they’d been traveling so hard and why the hell they’re on this weird contraption right now.

What’s interesting to me about what Wolfwood says here—about living his life the way he does, about the reason he kills—is because he’s doing it to protect something. Just reminds me of that bit of Stampede where Vash asks Wolfwood if he has something he wants to protect above anything else. And how protect has a different meaning to each of them—for Wolfwood it’s about who he’d kill for and for Vash it’s about what he would do to save them. Idk, there might be more there but I’m having a hard time explaining it.

Vash has a moment of doubt in front of Wolfwood! He admits he’s not always sure of what he’s doing. I kind of read Wolfwood’s silence as him not knowing what to say to that because he wasn’t expecting that

Okay, but how hidden is this place really if there’s a platform and an elaborate construction to get into it. Are you telling me no one has stumbled on it before and wondered where it led?

Vash is so afraid when he opens the door! His first thought is of all the horrors his enemies have promised to him and he doesn’t know if he can face it

Look at him!! He’s so sweet! He’s relieved and immediately goes to play with the kids. (While Wolfwood just poses lol)

Oh god, he gets teary eyed, he’s so happy! How rarely have people reacted to his presence with joy or care? 

How dare!! This was cruel. Crueler then if he’d walked in on corpses. He’s literally given something he wants so deeply and then has it snatched away

Ch7

Wolfwood really went, “I’m done listening to your bullshit” and interrupted Leonof’s evil villain speech. Respect.

Ooooh, Wolfwood did it because he was angry. He felt Leonof was too cruel! He cares so much about Vash already.

Hey um so…did Leonof just say his puppets used to be people?!?! That he dissected while they were alive?!?!?! Yeah, no wonder this guy is unimaginably cruel.

Oh, Vash is angry. I love how he’s drawn when he’s like this. He disappears behind his glasses and his face gets very still. That’s when you know he means business. 

Vash is crying blood!? And he’s so angry he’s emanating some weird aura that paralyzes Wolfwood and emits a “sensation of death.” I’m actually having trouble finding the words to describe how I feel because this is a very different Vash from the one we’re used to. It’s jarring and terrifying to see him like this. And that feeling also reminds Wolfwood again that Vash isn’t human, something Wolfwood is very fixated on.

Despite that, when Gray the Ninelives appears and Wolfwood makes eye contact with Vash, he doesn’t immediately go to shooting him! We’re making progress already.

That’s that for this volume! Excited to get started on the next one and see how the big showdown with Leonof goes!

[iheartsyaosaku]

Clear card pros and cons (that i can remember i need to reread it again)

Pros:

SYAOSAKU DATING ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

idk more content around our fave characters (though not as much but take it as you will)

The wierd ass technology update all of a sudden everyone has iphones (minus syaoran)

It picked up from the og ending where syaoran comes back from hong kong

SYAOSAKU DATING 🥹🥹🥹

SYAOSAKU WENT ON A DATE ‼️‼️

Unlocked sakura new swag (at the cost of ending her cardcaptor retirement…)

(Anime only) english dub actors of trc syaosaku voice ccscc syaosaku i thought that was pretty cool (syaoran sounds like maybe he went through puberty a little too early but thats okay)

(Anime only) SYAORAN SPEAKS FRENCH IN THE ENGLISH DUB

cute art style

Maybe just me but sometimes i get a little emotional seeing sakura in her daily life in middle school because its like !! Wow i remember when you were in 4th grade and now you’re in 7th grade im so proud of you sakura 🥹

Momo (new mascot to make marketable plushie off of)

(Anime only) MEILING COMEBACK ‼️

THE SYAOSAKU SONG HOSHI NO TEGAMI 😭😭😭😭😭 BEST SONG EVERRRR WTF SYAORANS SINGING VOICE IS SO!:?:)/$/? THEYRE SUCH A GOOD DUET

SYAOSAKU DATING. Btw. Theyre a couple. Theyre dating and theyre in love.

Cons:

KAITO.

New characters who happen to be mediocre

Akiho is literally just a carbon copy of sakura who is just sad (they refused to touch on the different aspects of her like reading books, singing and from kong kong only very rarely)

Kaito fucking sucks literally worst ccs of all time and THATS A LOT saying theres literal PEDOS in the fucking show but theyre all background characters but they can also piss off

Tbf i got confused along the way

Too many plot holes

Syaosaku angst

Syaosaku couldnt touch for a while 😔

Anyway why did yelan do that (referring to point above)

Some shit does not make sense

Tsubasa/xxxholic references (this is for you oomf)

Syaoran???? Is part of the “im keeping things from sakura” gang???? And it sucks so bad (yes it got resolved in the later half BUT IT STILL SUCKED)

TOO MANY THINGS KEPT FROM SAKURA JUST TELL HER DAMN

pushes most characters from the og manga aside to focus on akiho and that man 🙄🙄🙄

Clamp forces us to care about them but in reality we really do not gaf

(In reference to point above) Clamp sees that and pushes the nostalgia tactics/references sometimes and its lowkey tiring

The part where the syao/saku/tomo were reminiscing that fuck ass teacher made me ill i genuinely wanted to kms

Still hasnt gotten rid of their p*do ass shit thanks clamp very cool (sarcasm)

Did i mention that the og characters were pushed back? Because they really were

Akiho felt more of the main character of this story instead of sakura

Tbh not much happened in the entirety of this manga ESPECIALLY considering time shenanigans

Im still mad that syaoran hid stuff from sakura tbh

HOW CAN I FORGET THE UGLY ASS “YUNAAKI IS SIMILAR TO SYAOSAKU” PARALLELS AND HOW BADLY IT PISSES ME OFF

syaosaku dont look but theres an ugly bitch trying to be like you (yunaaki)

Yunaaki becoming borderline canon despite it being a toxic and p*dophilic ship

Kaito still exists in this fucking story and got a somewhat happy ending (befriending syaoran dont piss me the fuck off)

COMPARING KAITO TO SYAORAN KYS @ CLAMP

Kero/tomoyo/yue/nakuru/spinnel basically everyone magically involved is pushed back basically useless until the final act (i think i mentioned the character pushback before)

Still major plotholes

Yamazaki tells the truth now

Touya got whitewashed

Akiho still has too many similarities to sakura it still pisses me off. Why cant they make her her own character

My girl sakura developed anxiety

MY BOY SYAORAN DEVELOPED DEPRESSION

angsty ass middle schoolers

Didnt like the scene where sakuras grandad was basically throwing shade at syaoran comparing his romance with sakura to … sakura’s fuckass dad grooming her mom. What

Syaoran calmed down a bit i miss when he was chaotic af but whatever #middleschoolerthings

Season 2 is taking forever to release good lord

[chibinightowl]

“I am Fae. There is very little I do that ultimately isn’t in my best interest. I have spent an untold number of years seeking power, and when I first laid my eyes on you, I knew you were different—I even said so. When you have lived for as long as I have, different is good.” 

Jason waits, sensing the fae isn’t done yet. 

“What I didn’t expect was the… the fire between us. I have had many lovers in my life, but never have I lain with someone who makes me melt the way you do. I want—I want to keep that for as long as I can.” Tim’s tone takes on an earnest note. “Fae do not love the way humans do—we’re incapable of it—but I feel like, thanks to you, I have an idea of what it is. I would rather die than see you come to harm by something I can save you from.” 

I did remember parts of it but I definitely had to go and copy paste it cause didn’t remember it to the dot but loved the contrast and how honest and heartfelt they were. Love winter lord Timmy I miss him 😔

Bonus:

"You got anything big enough I can wear to sleep? Otherwise you’re getting Jason au naturale.”

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 ok now i wanna reread dog days of summer for the uptenth time. It's the season 💖🤣

Just for you, Kriz...

He cocks his head, unsure if it's curiosity or abject confusion warring within. Before him stand the shadowlings he'd left in his human's care while he rested and recuperated from his ordeal at the hands of the Queen of Night.

This might have been a mistake.

"What are you wearing?" he asks, gesturing to one of the shadowy blobs that has some unidentifiable red fabric around its waist.

"A tutu, my Lord of Winter."

A what?

Puzzling, to be sure. However, he is already picking up on his human's suppressed mirth and refuses to be baited into asking what the garment's function is. He will find out, make no mistake about that because curiosity has ever been his downfall.

For now, he casts his gaze over the rest of the shadowlings. His memory of them is hazy, wracked by pain as he'd been at the time, but he's pretty sure they were all identical in shape and size and overall toothiness before he'd passed out.

These beings most certainly are not.

"You." He points languidly to one who wears a long shadow as a cape with a cowl adorned by little horns. "Why do you shadow instead of color?"

All the others are wearing something colorful, but this one blends well in the night.

Beside him, his mortal starts to audibly snicker, as does the purple one who has yet to leave his presence. "Oh, this is gonna be good," Hood murmurs to her.

The shadowling steps forward and thumps its chest, which has the effect of making its rotund little belly jiggle. "Becausse I'm Noir."

He suspects there is more to this answer than he is receiving as both Hood and the purple one grin widely.

"Noir, show him what you do to B," Hood coaxes. His grin grows even bigger.

The shadowling puffs its chest out and holds up its shadowy cape so that it billows in the clearing. "I am darkness. I am the night. I am BATMAN!" it all but crows.

Hood and the purple one fall into laughter like this is the most funny thing in all of existence and the shadowling preens under the attention.

As the rest of the shadowlings join in on the mirth with their hissing laughter, the Lord of Winter decides leaving these Fae creatures with the Red Hood was probably a rather large mistake. He inwardly sighs and gives up on trying to understand.

There are many other things he would prefer to do on this night before he has to return to Fae.

His gaze lands on his still-laughing mortal and basks in the brightness and warmth of his aura. If he has his way about it, it will be more than Hood's aura that will be wrapped around him tonight.

After all, there's only so much one can do in dreams.

[franeridan]

rereading op and I just realized how interesting it is that despite luffy's picking his crewmates mostly on sight it's generally a pretty long journey before they actually place themselves completely and fully in his hands - if they ever do. even the ones luffy initially insists on bringing along without giving them much of a choice (nami, usopp) have at one point to turn to him and either ask for his help or for him to take them with him

(this is another post altogether but I'd also never realized how consistent op was in keeping up usopp's jokes about being the captain until the plot forced him to accept that he wasn't, and that some choices weren't his, and that either he gave it up or found another ship to sail on - and he did give it up, which is what I had never noticed specifically. I don't think he ever jokes about being the captain again, after water seven)

there's those who initially reject the offer and then have to ask luffy to take them, actually (sanji, chopper if I remember right), and those who sail with him for a while before they actually place enough of their trust in him to ask for his help (robin, sanji again - extremely interesting with sanji specifically, as he's one of luffy's right-hand men and yet takes the absolute longest to properly share himself with luffy and ask him for his help), and those who accept immediately but have to take care of things before being fully able to put themselves in luffy's hands (brook, jinbe) - and luffy always considers them crewmates from the start, but still patiently waits for them to come to him despite never actually leaving their sides whether they want it or not

(and he does accept their choice whichever it may be in the end, as shown by vivi and yamato and momo and, to a certain hilarious degree, law as well - luffy wants them to join, still actively considers them part of his crew, but accepts their will to stay once they tell him they won't go with him)

the part that I find really really interesting about this is that this pattern does not hold for zoro and franky - though I haven't reread franky's arc for long enough that I can be 100% sure, I'm fairly certain luffy insists on him joining despite franky's continuous refusal and then that's just that. he stays.

same goes for zoro, but with zoro for me it's even more incredible because, compared to how franky's journey with luffy is pretty.........smooth sailing (lol) in the sense that he's never really challenged on his choice to join, zoro is asked to prove his devotion and trust over and over and over again by the narrative - he's challenged on it dozens of times and he never falters at all. of course there's kuma and then mihawk, but also in the arc right after the one he's recruited, not even a couple days after he met luffy, he's hurt enough to need rest in the middle of a fight and he just tells luffy he's gonna take a nap, trusting luffy will take care of his life like it's just obvious. the same problems everyone else have to wrestle with when it comes to their pride and their trust, zoro just doesn't have. he just trusts luffy. he just puts himself completely in his hands. which is actually hilarious considering zoro was the one luffy was the most aggressive in recruiting, that was given zero choices on the matter at all

I don't know if it's because above everyone else luffy puts himself in zoro's hands the most, so there's a certain level of equal standing that's absent with everyone else - but zoro never tries to put himself above luffy in any way, and actually gives himself up for him with frightening ease. I wonder if it's because luffy needs someone like that, from a narrative pov - someone that can act as a pillar and a center, someone the story never challenges luffy on so that luffy can always stand on solid ground whatever's going on around him. I mean, zoro is literally in charge of making sure luffy doesn't drown after all

or maybe zoro's just too dumb and straightforward a person to get tangled up in his mind that much, also a concrete possibility (the most probable one, lbr)

(on an interesting side note, this puts zoro on the completely opposite end of the spectrum compared to sanji - he's the one that was given the less choice and accepted the most rapidly, while the story lets sanji refuse twice, once years after he joined, making his struggle to properly feel as permanent part of the crew the longest in the manga by far)

(I have a feeling this might have been done on purpose)

[dallonwrites]

cactus, sage & aloe vera for the asks pls! <3

cactus ⇢ something you’re currently learning (about)?

ever since i started testosterone and my hunger and appetite went UPPPP i've gotten way more into cooking and baking and food science and it is all so interesting to me! and it's not even from a health/diet pov at all it's just thinking about how food works and how i respond to it and as someone with stomach problems and also autism food sensitivities who basically ate Nothing for the first 20 years of my life it is all very healing!

and bc this is a writeblr a writing thing i'm learning and thinking about a lot is taking inspo form other writers and what that actually means. i've talked about it before but i used to read prose i love and not know what to do with that. i'd get frustrated because i did not understand how the writer was just able to conjure a line like that. and then i was so focused on wanting to reflect that writer that i did not consider where in the reflection my writing would go. i've noticed as i grow more confident in my style i've also grown more confident in how to emulate. sometimes i like to do exercises where i intentionally try to write a Passage That Sounds Like This Writer but it's more of a learning process as to the how of that style, which i then mix with my own writing. now whenever i take inspo from other styles it feels more like a love letter to those writers rather than a sensed need that to be Good at writing i need to Write Like This Person, when not only could i not truly write like that person but that person also could not write like me! that's the beauty of it! i actually reread a short story i loved last year recently and found some of the prose, not bad but i was like hmm not for me anymore! overall i still loved the prose but it showed me how i was able to love a style but still pick out what elements of it i liked and would want to incorporate it on my own vs what i wouldn't do myself (which again, does not make that particular element bad), rather than trying to make a perfect replication

sage ⇢ what ‘medium’ of art (poetry, music, fiction, paintings, statues etc.) is the most touching to you? why do you think that is?

ohhh my god okay sorry i have to be that guy who just says All of them. my brain simply refuses to see one type of art as more touching than the other!! it is just not true they all serve different purposes and the same purposes in different ways!! even the ones that are most touching to me personally is so dependent on the time and era. lately i find something that touches me in everything. like fiction will always have a special space in my heart because my creativity is driven by the fact that i can create fully fleshed people in my head where for me everything about them feels real - their emotions, their fears, their joy - and that is something that never fails to amaze me. on the other hand, poetry was the only medium after my mom died where i felt i could process my emotions about that at a time when they didn't make sense yet, because of poetry's space for abstractness. it became like a necessity. and then on another hand i'm amazed by painting and how brushstrokes and style can convey so much it's magic to me. recently when i listen to music i notice different instruments and sounds and how they work together at once and i'm obsessed with it, the ecosystem of it all. every day i become more and more of a cinephile because i'm just obsessed with all the elements of creation in movies - from performance to writing to visuals to soundtracking to sfx to editing - especially in all the 60s-80s films i've been watching for lover boy and how the effects don't always look "realistic" but they are earnest. and statues and embroidery and crotchet and pottery and makeup and nail art and gender expression and graphic design and cooking and i can go on every art medium is storytelling to me. AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT CAVE PAINTINGS??? ROCK PAINTINGS?? EVEN AT OUR MOST PRIMAL WE WERE CREATING! all of it is touching to me!!

aloe vera ⇢ what’s something (mundane) you really want to experience in life?

i want to see the sunrise more often especially coming out of summer where it rises at like 4am i now feel a yearning to get up at like 6am and see it. unfortunately i have Far Too Many sleep problems to be getting out of bed at a time like that

get to know me asks

[spacebabe51]

OK so a couple people seemed interested in the fic rec list so here it is. I haven’t done one of these before so keep in mind this is just my personal likes, and idk if this is usual but i’m also going to put my little mini reviews + warnings (not content warnings but anything I think might deter someone from reading) on them so you kind of know what to expect. Obviously I can’t vouch for any of the authors on this list as I don’t know any of them personally, so if some fic ends up being written by a heinous person just know I didn’t raise them that way. List under the cut: 

OK! Without further ado, I’m going to be ranking these in descending order down to my all-time favorite, but first I'm going to add two fics that are kind of nebulous to rank because they are both crossovers. If I were going to rank them, both would be near the top of the list.

“Now You’re Thinking With Real Science” by Jaywings

This fic is just insanely good. It’s a Portal 2 crossover, and even for two franchises that already seem to blend together really well with the same brand of darkly humorous cyberpunk themes, it does a really good job of fitting the world and characters together in a way that makes perfect sense. Everything flows together really well, and every character from a large cast of characters is well handled and gets a chance to do something (or have something done to them). Fair warning, there are a few pretty intense scenes, and this one is as of yet unfinished, but still updating, and I highly recommend it. 

Warnings: This fic makes me want to like wheatley again and I won't, dammit. I refuse. Die you traitorous metal ball.

“Mad World” by iamwriting

This is a crossover between IZ and Jhonen Vasquez’ other most famous work, his horror/black comedy comic series Johnny the Homicidal Maniac. For those that have never read any of Vasquez' other work, it’s safe to say that JTHM makes Invader Zim look like Blue’s Clues, so fair warning before going into it this fic is dark. I wouldn’t go so far as to say it’s depressing, but it certainly handles very heavy themes (insanity, suicide...murder, obviously) and doesn’t pull punches. That said, it really surprised me just how well-crafted, compelling and moving this fic is. By the time I was finished with it, all the plot threads had pulled together so tightly I had to go back and reread chapters just to confirm that oh, yeah- I didn’t imagine that, the author set that up so subtly I didn’t even notice. An absolute 10/10 for plot, mood, and how well it kept me engaged (I spent an entire workday feverishly reading this and didn’t even notice the time pass) with a powerful and satisfying payoff. 

Warnings: This story is told in a very restricted first person pov, which can sometimes feel awkward, but is necessary for setting up an unreliable narrator. Characters, particularly Zim, can also sometimes feel ooc, but this too has an in-fic explanation that I won’t spoil.

OK! Enough crossovers, onto the ranked fics:

#6: “Hey, Spacejerk” by HeCallsMeHisChild

This particular author and her series of fics were some of the first that I read in the fandom, and one thing I can say with absolute certainty is that she has the most original ideas I’ve ever seen. Hey Spacejerk is strange, and that’s not a bad thing. It starts out as sort of a self-contained exploration of isolation with elements of psychological horror, and blossoms into something totally different by the end. If you don’t mind suspending disbelief and being taken along for the ride, I really think this it's an enjoyable read, with a strange but satisfying conclusion. 

Warnings: not really an issue for me, but this fic was written before the movie release, and Prof. Membrane takes on a villain-like role in this story so if that’s a deal breaker, you’ve been warned. 

#5 “A Parade of Indignities” by RissyNicole 

A LOT has been said about this fic and how good it is that there’s almost not much left to say. This story is epic in scope and very good at maintaining the nail-biting suspense it sets up early on. Supporting characters who didn’t get much focus in the show are a big part of this one, and help the world feel more fleshed out and alive. This story isn’t finished, and I have to admit I’m actually not caught up with it, but regardless. The fandom considers this one a must-read and I do too. 

Warnings: If you are an anxious hypochondriac like me this one can be a psychological horror as well! Little added bonus :)

#4 “Important Messages From Beyond the Stars” by myrskytuuli

This one is very niche and catered to my interests. I love stories that utilize the Resisty, and I'm an absolute sucker for anything exploring Zim’s time working as a scientist on Vort. Is it canon compliant? Not even close. Is it fully in character? Highly debatable, but this fic rec list needs some of the heartwarming found family healing only fanfic can provide, and goddamn it this fic provides. This one is also unfinished but still updating, and as new chapters and plot threads are introduced I’m more and more excited to see where it leads. 

Warnings: Again, if you’re looking for canon compliance and the usual dark cynicism of IZ, this is not the fic for you. 

#3 "Forced Perspective" by 0palite

I read this fic more recently after stumbling across some of the adorable drawings the author did for each chapter. This fic is quintessential zadf, and that’s a-ok with me. It’s character driven all the way through, and great care is taken in examining the different ways they think, as well as their motivations and worldviews. Everything feels in line with canon, and the development of the plot as well as the central friendship is natural and never feels too contrived. Really enjoyable read, and the drawings and animations created for every chapter are so charming and a huge added bonus to this one.

Warnings: None really, if slowburn zadf isn’t your thing you won’t enjoy this. 

#2 “Experimental” by HideousBlob 

 I don't think it would be an overstatement of any kind to say that Experimental and its lost? sequel Hypothetical are sort of the golden standard when it comes to Invader Zim fics. Butingly funny, very in character, bordering on psychological horror in places, this one excels at utilizing Zim's manic hypochondria to create a real sense of paranoia and keep the reader guessing. A great story with or without the slowburn zadf going on in the background, this fic is also available in the form of a great 8-bit RPG game with multiple choices and endings. One thing to note is that this particular author has since distanced herself from the fandom, so although you can still find the fic on archive.org (dm me if you’d like to play the game) please don’t go attempt to contact her about it. 

Warnings: I just wish I could read her other fics again. Thats all 😭😭

#1 “Leaving Home” by DiscoTeriyaki

This fic is the bane of my existence. It’s so good I hate it. And the worst part is that I can’t even put my finger on exactly what makes it so good. Leaving Home’s main idiosyncracy is that it’s very grounded in the real world, much more so than most other fics on this list. For example, Dib and Gaz have (or, had) a mother, real-world cities are mentioned, and the author utilizes a soundtrack of real-world songs from the late 1970’s to tell the story. This fic is very self-contained and small in scope, but it has a cutting, straight-forward and bittersweet take on the characters and their relationships. Exploring themes of growing up, death and remembrance, forgiveness, and what it means to be important to someone without particularly liking them. Everytime I read it (and I’ve read it a few times) I notice something new, and I’m in awe of how well this author is able to say so much in so few words. If you read this, do yourself a favor and listen to the music the fic provides. 

Gripes: I’d really like to stop crying everytime “The Lights Go Down” by ELO comes on please and thanks. 

And that's it! If you decide to read anything on this list, let me know what you thought of it, and please show these authors some love. And if there's a fic you think I would enjoy based on these recs, I'd be thrilled to check it out (and YES that includes your own fic). Thanks for reading!

[starboundanon]

*sigh* Hi. It's me 7AM reread Anon (just know that if it weren't for the exam i've got in 2 hours i'd be rereading it for the third Time in... 2 days... And yes... at 7AM again...) SOTF really gots me in a chokehold (which... Ironic ig) because i just woke up and my brain came back to the last chapter and what could have been Anakin's train of thoughts at some point, which went about like this :

"Such a pretty Baby boy... My baby boy, all mine. My good boy who gave me all of his first time... They are all mine just as he is" Eh just woke up so it's not making as much sense as it did 10 minutes ago.

BUT What i really wanted to share with you are my guesses about what will happen in the future! (Don't have to tell me if i'm right i just wanted to share them with you)

1. The whole Anakin picks Luke up from school and then makes sure he didn't have "too much fun" becomes a bit of a ritual and Luke is horrified to discover how terrible he feels when Obi-Wan is home and they can't do it (with late night visit from Anakin softly teasing him about it)

2. The one thing i think will lead to a spanking is Luke refusing to give Anakin a blowjob (the one thing where Luke must be a more active part of everything and well despite last chapter he's still very much in denial) even if you did say that Anakin gets most of his pleasure from Luke's so again it might not happen

("Are you ready to please Daddy now Baby?"

Luke nods, sniffling.

"That's my good boy", Anakin gives him a little stroke, urging him softly to the ground.

Luke whimpers as he kneels, no carpet for his knees and his backside on fire where it rests on his feet.

"Does it hurt Baby? You know that naughty boys shouldn't get pillows ?", The older man reprimands.

The blond nods even as he holds back more tears. He hears a sigh from above him "I really spoil you too much"

Luke blinks when two pillows enter his line of sight.)

There. 7 AM woke up thinking about that, thought i'd share it with you.

3. Last minute thought but perhaps an exhange student or just young adult Din ending up in Tatooine and flirting with Luke which, unfortunately for him, happened right in front of his dad

7am anon, you are a treasure and a saint.

I adore this ask, partly because you are sweet as a peach, and partly because this is the shit that makes fanfiction so good!! Me sharing my nasty ass trash ramblings and inspiring someone else to pop their head in and say, "What about this?" is like. The joy of creation and the human experience. Readers like you make writing worth it.

Thank you for spoiling me with your glowing praise, I am truly flattered beyond belief ♥ I hope you enjoy tomorrow's update!

[everythingsinred]

Let's Talk About NatsuMikan: Mikan (pt. 30)

Today we'll talk about love and confessions and agency. More specifically, I'll discuss a little about Mikan's love for Natsume and her inability to voice it out loud.

This is my NM essay so there's no multi-shipping, in this part more than any other. I say that so y'all can know. In my opinion, this arc has Mikan making a choice and I respect that more than anything. I'm with Ruka about defending her agency and the fact that she does choose.

<- Prev Next ->

Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Two

Hotaru tells Mikan to go on without her. She wants to stay there for Subaru, to ask him questions and find out more about him, to be siblings like he’d suggested before she went on her time trip. They hadn’t had the chance to really bond, since he’d been trying to protect her this whole time. This is her chance to support him and she can’t pass it up.

And yes, that means saying good-bye to Mikan, for who knows how long.

So Mikan and Hotaru hug, and then Hotaru kisses her, in front of everyone, and tells her she loves her. “More than you think I do.” 

Well, I guess I have to analyze this. I’m hesitant because I actually don’t know how.

When I read this the first dozen times, the kiss never came across as particularly romantic to me because I didn’t really see much suggestion that there was genuine romance between them--just jokes, especially in the earlier chapters. I don’t especially like thinking that Hotaru is in love with Mikan because that’s another person for me to feel sorry for, just like Ruka, and also because I don’t really like when stories have every character in love with one person. But! That seems to be what’s happening.

Mikan will receive a few love confessions tonight and she really only responds to one (though not yet). Again, I’m not a multishipper, but I’m genuinely sorry, Hotaru. I wish for nothing but your happiness. I prefer, personally, to read Mikan and Hotaru’s relationship as entirely platonic, kind of how I prefer Ruka and Mikan too. That’s just how I roll. It makes things easier on my fragile soul.

Mikan only reacts with confusion, so it seems like it came out of nowhere for her as well. For all her getting overwhelmed with romance, she hadn't expected any romance from Hotaru's direction. Generally, this moment passes and isn't addressed again.

Such a shame to always save your most important and genuine feelings for goodbyes. Take a lesson from this, kids. Tell people you love them, not because you're leaving or because they are, but just because you love them.

They have to teleport again, in any case, and Mikan has to leave her best friend behind. She can’t even hear everything Hotaru is saying, but she can’t go back. 

Mikan, having teleported once more, starts to cry. And that makes sense! Because the theme here is loss, and she keeps having to say good-bye to people she loves, not knowing when she’ll see them again. But despite her tears being entirely understandable, Mikan apologizes for always crying, like it’s weak of her to feel so much. She promises to become stronger, but that’s silly because she already is strong. She just witnessed so much pain in only one night and is still standing, still fighting hard, refusing to give up. Is that not strength?

Are you not strong already? I don't get it.

Even Hotaru was crying as they were separated, even though Mikan still wishes she could be strong like her, so is that not strength? 

Mikan loves Hotaru too and always has and promises to see her again, that their bond won’t break, echoing Hotaru’s same words. 

Chapter One Hundred Thirty-Three

I regretfully won’t be discussing the Imai siblings’ scene, though I did just reread it and sobbed my eyes out as is my duty everytime I read this chapter. Mikan isn’t there, so. We move on.

Mikan’s having a rough go of it, but the night is not over yet.

Tono suggests they split up. It’s the best idea right now. Ruka and Mikan should teleport away, and with only one person to protect instead of many, the barrier alice stone won’t be as much of a burden on him. The rest of them will fight off pursuers and keep them distracted. It’s time. The end of the night is approaching.

There isn’t even time for a real good-bye, which is why they had the alice-stone gifting earlier, I suppose. They all knew there wouldn’t be much time later on. Mikan is sad to have to leave Tsubasa, Tono, and Natsume (!, which his name in a little bubble all its own so we know he’s different, yet again) without even saying a proper good-bye, but Ruka is already taking his duty seriously, pulling Mikan away so they can teleport. 

Don't save things for the last minute! Just love people just because!

But the telepathy alice comes in handy again. No, it’s not helpful in the battles. It doesn’t help with healing or protection. But Mikan can hear someone saying her name, and it’s not her mom this time.

Mikan is floored by this, her eyes welling with tears as she catches Natsume’s gaze. 

“A feeling so strong, intense, and painful… Almost like a scream.”

Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Four

At the start of this night, what feels like so long ago, Natsume told a room full of enemies that he loves Mikan. He proved it time and time again in the hours that followed. He confessed he wanted to stay by her side forever, that he’d always protect her, and he prioritized her safety all night. 

And she never said it back. 

But this is different. This isn’t just words; she can literally feel how he feels for her. She is overwhelmed by it, and saying good-bye while leaving it like that is now impossible. The fact that he has her pebble alice stone is no longer enough. “Me too” isn’t enough.

She still doesn’t say it out loud, but she admits it to herself and to us, for the first time in this whole manga, that she loves him too. And our handy telepathy alice conveys these powerful feelings to Natsume too, so that he finally knows her answer. 

It’s so interesting that Mikan only responds when she literally feels his love for her firsthand. It’s not his words or thoughts that break her resolve; it’s his actual emotions, and she’s able to answer only then, knowing now that their love for each other is entirely requited, when she’s unable to leave him without admitting it.

And that’s huge--obviously--because we’ve watched Mikan this whole time, watched her deny and push down her feelings for him, watched her skirt the subject, not even confiding to us how she feels. But she can’t keep it up anymore. His feelings completely shatter her resolve--his painful, sorrowful, powerful feelings, the ones she reciprocates.

Another favorite page of mine. I just love Natsume's heart-wrenching expression.

“I love you so much,” she thinks before teleporting away with Ruka.

Loss.

Mikan didn’t want to leave Natsume or her senpais, but she knows she has to, and it’s best to leave before she can’t will herself to anymore, after she’s done the difficult, vulnerable thing and confessed. She didn’t want either of them to suffer with the knowledge of her feelings, but it’s too late now. She had to let him know, even if it was only telepathically.

Whereas Mikan was able to swear that she and Hotaru would always be together, even if they were separated, Mikan’s parting thought to Natsume is the same thought that united them at the start of the night: “I don’t want us to be apart.” Mikan knows Natsume is sick, that he’s dying, that he’s careless with his alice. She doesn’t know when she’ll be free to see him again, and there’s a good chance she might never see him again, because he might die. She doesn’t want to part from him now, because if she does, it’ll probably be forever.

Mikan and Ruka have successfully teleported to a safe place, giving Mikan one more well-needed breather before the night gets even worse. Ruka is concerned for her, but Mikan can’t stop crying. But she gets up so they can keep moving until Ruka collapses. She suggests they rest for a while, but Ruka feels insecure, like a burden, like he’s holding not only her but everyone else back because he’s too weak to protect Mikan the way he should. 

Mikan doesn’t feel that way and is just concerned for his well-being. He’s certainly not weak. 

He's just the sweetest and most perfect of the main four, I think.

But it’s his turn to confess, telling her with his head in his hands that he loves her, and immediately following his confession up with an apology because he’d never meant to say it. Mikan is--again--touched and heartbroken for him, saddened because she’d always known, deep down, but didn’t know how to address it. But Ruka assures her that he will always be hoping that she and Natsume find each other again, that they can be happy together. He just confessed, but he needs her to know that he supports her and Natsume, that he holds no grudges, that he just wants both of them to be happy. 

(I can’t believe some fics have Ruka act entitled and jealous when this boy has always been a sweetheart. I’m so mad about it.)

Mikan may not love Ruka romantically, but she does love him, and, overcome with this affection, she hugs him. Though Ruka admonishes her for babying him, he clearly holds no hard feelings that she isn’t able to reciprocate. He’s energized by this, by the fact that he was finally able to say it, and he holds out her hand for them to finally meet Yuka after all this time. Mikan smiles as they go, happy to have his support and affection, even if it looks different from hers.

Mikan has been confessed to three times tonight. All verbally.

Natsume starts the night off strong, announcing his feelings to a whole room, including Mikan. He’s brave; he says the words.

Hotaru tells Mikan she loves her in front of their friends. She’s brave; after all this time where she kept her emotions behind an iron coldness, she says the words.

Ruka tells Mikan with his fingers hiding his face, but he still says it, even without an audience, even knowing she doesn’t feel the same. He decides to be brave and says the words.

I love the Mikan and Ruka friendship. I think they're superior with the platonic lens but maybe that's just me (I know plenty of y'all agree with me, actually).

Mikan couldn’t say the words; she only thought them. I’m not saying she’s not brave, because even just admitting it to herself took a lot, but it’s interesting that she doesn’t say it out loud. She has to be brave about so many things, but this heavily guarded secret, something so vulnerable and volatile she couldn’t even admit it to herself, is still too fragile to be spoken out loud.

Conclusion

I know I could include more but I'll finish this arc next time.

Mikan has been confessed to by three people tonight but only Natsume gets romantic reciprocity, even if it's telepathic. Going forward, Mikan's feelings and her struggle voicing them will be important thematically.

I'll see y'all next time!

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[strixop]

cw // bhna 362 manga spoilers, possible character death

ok!!! i have a long, loooong time theory i’ve been meaning to speak about on this blog, and even one of the reasons i started this blog, and with 362 it’s getting more relevant than ever.

call it a sin, but i haven’t watched that much of the subtitled version of bhna seasons 1-4, and it’s been a while since i saw seasons five- i watched it when it was released, and have yet to rewatch it, in favor of the manga.

so i can’t comment as much on the japanese va’s and roles, and i also haven’t reread most any of the early chapters in the manga. but, the english dub of the early seasons, present mic (and occasional aizawa) have been the ones to voiceover and explain peoples quirks. sometimes it’s in a scenario at that current moment (ex. aizawa explaining class 1-As quirks to blood king s5 ep1) but more often than not it’s apparent that it’s just them talking to the viewer.

more than this, when the shows opening plays, deku speaks in the past tense. “when i was young i realized that all men are not created equal” blah blah blah, whatever, we just know that he said that pretty often throughout the show (probably to keep viewer retention, but whatever).

nevertheless, he speaks in past tense. that might not mean anything on surface level, and yeah, it might just be a inner monologue, but why would he say this? besides typical tv purposes, whenever he reflects during the story, he never speaks this way. he thinks of supporting roles, or moments of significance up to his current action, not that he wasn’t equal. so that implies further, complete reflection. we haven’t seen him do that, not really.

honestly, when i had this idea i hadn’t really thought about it past surface level fluff, but then i started reading more tumblr analysis. (unfortunately i lost the blog that made this post, but thank you, op!!)

there was a specific post that caught my eye, speaking about the toga confession chapter. this has been touched on by a lot of people, but there’s a specific log of dialogue that sounds suspiciously like bakugou.

“because for all his triumphs, he was still just a damned nerd.”

that got me thinking, even more. the fact of the matter is, bakugou is one of, if not the only characters to say something like this. “damned nerd”, has both damned and nerd in it, both words bakugou very frequently uses.

though i was more convinced, i let it stew. until bam. 362. besides the obvious whiplash, i basically drowned myself in tumblr posts, until i came across this post.

https://chandralia.tumblr.com/post/691959313676304384/why-does-it-sound-like-both-deku-and-bakugo-are

in other words, it sounds as if bakugou & midoriya are narrating, and that is why im writing this now.

ladies and gentlemen, i believe that bhna is narrated podcast style.

because honestly? it makes sense!!

all of these people, these prominent characters working together to tell the story of the worlds greatest hero. to say that deku isn’t just another all might, and that greatness isn’t born from lucky circumstances and no self preservation. to say that someone “worth nothing” can show their worth.

and it would make more sense!! present mic literally has a radio show, aizawa is literally one of his mentors, and bakugou is his kacchan, his other half. if you ship them or not is your opinion, but regardless of subjectivity, they hold a bond indescribable compared to almost any other character, canonically.

yeah it might just be because i’m obsessed with the image of them all in a recording studio, and yeah it might be that i refuse to accept the possibility that katsuki might be dead, but if there’s even a chance that something like this could be a possibility i will not stop speaking about it.

if all of this is just brainrot, so be it, but it would be so inspiring to see something like this, and would be huge for such a popular and such an iconic shoujo manga to pursue something like this, and hey, that would be amazing for a future au!! :)

[linearao3]

So, I’ve been rereading Serves you Right (every time it gets better) and I got caught up thinking about this part: “Ravka is full of Suli girls called Inej. She gives him nothing in giving him her given name. Almost nothing.” There are so many layers of complication to her sense of identity throughout your fic and I feel like each sentence from this and the paragraph before could use, like, at least a full paragraph of dissection. I'm curious, did you consider having Inej give a fake name?

I didn’t really consider it, no. I mean, she’s aware that she maybe should give him a fake name. But there are several factors in play that make her give her own — first and most consciously, that she doesn’t like lying. She has spent years clinging to whatever scraps of ethics the Barrel let her keep, trying to stay a good person in any way she can. I don’t think she would lie unless she felt a serious need to, and as she says, it’s a common name, so there’s no pressing need.

Then, she probably knows from years of hanging around her favorite conman that unnecessary layers of lies just make things more likely to go wrong. Giving a fake name is making work for yourself, to remember it and react correctly when it’s said. A bit of truth makes a lie easier to maintain.

And then, edging more into unconscious reasons, she clearly has a strong relationship with her own name — Kaz offers her the opportunity to change it when he takes her out of the Menagerie, and she refuses; when he asks her what she wants, she says she never wants to be called Wraith again; when she decides what she does want, she reiterates her own name to herself. She’s clearly very proud of her family name, which is linked to her professional/artistic pride (“a Ghafa never works with a net”). She resented Heleen taking her name from her, and she doesn’t want to take it from herself.

And she is, finally, clearly doing an absolutely terrible job at mentally separating herself from the character she’s supposed to be playing. She wants there to be a difference, but she and Kaz are both making that extremely difficult. Giving that character a different name would be counterintuitive, because she doesn’t fully experience a difference.

(This is all, of course, notably different from Kaz, who loves slapping fake names on himself so he can avoid thinking about himself in his totality!)

Thank you so much for reading the fic again; I’m really pleased to know it’s still enjoyable!