#don't look at my kind of demented looking baby

[fruutes]

maybe don't name ur plane-loving husband's daughter after a dead pilot...

Dude the way my jaw dropped. The gasp I gusp.

Listen!! Listen. I thought it was SO clever ok!! It's dedicated to him and Emily!

Maybe it's a prophecy... love u Amelia it was nice knowing u.... or maybe I should just make her build a habit of refueling as often as possible...

[synnamonroll666]

Wicked Temptation

Pairing: Josh Washington x Fem!Reader Description: You decided to stay in the shed with Josh until dawn, letting Chris and Mike go back to the lodge for some much needed rest. But Josh knows a little secret that you've been hiding for a couple years and unfortunately for you, Josh has no mercy to spare tonight... Warnings: Mutual Pining, Mild Violence, Thigh Riding, Grinding, Edging, Humiliation, Degradation, Strip Tease, BlowJob (Male And Female Receiving), Cock Warming, Teasing, P In V, Creampie, Switch!Josh, Switch!Reader, Bondage??? Shibari??? I Don't Know, I Just Went All Out With This One. 😅 Word Count: 10k!!!!! A/N: This is not only my very first Josh Washington smut fic, but it's also the first time I've ever written a fic 10k words long! I've been working on this since January and let me tell you, it's been a struggle to finish it. It started out as some 2k idea but then I decided, since I was changing fandoms, I might as well go big for my first smut fic for Josh. I've put a lot of work into it between editing it dozens of times and watching that shed scene probably billions of times to get the lines correct. Since I have taken so long to write it and put so much effort into it, it's kind of like my baby now and I'm so excited to share it with all of you. As some of you know, I've been going through quite a lot of shit lately but focusing on this has helped me greatly, and that's another reason why this fic means so much to me. So here's to new beginning, because there will definitely be more of this good stuff to come in the future too! Enjoy! 🖤 Main MasterList: 🖤 Kassie's Angels: @lorebite, @mornandil, @koexchange, @yesitsloulou, @mistmoose, @jasonexo, @fortune-fool02, and @raven-the-cryptid. (If you want to be added to the taglist, let me know in the comments! 🖤)

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I followed closely behind Chris and Mike, who had their hands full with a very uncooperative Josh. It had been one hell of a night. First I got chased around by some demented psychopath, then I found a video of my crush of five years being sawed in two; and then I found out that he was actually the psycho all along and he possibly killed one of my close friends, Jessica. I was exhausted, but at least the deadly grip of the cold mountain air around my frame did help to wake me up a bit. I could only think positively at this point. It was the only way to stay sane.

But unfortunately, that did not last long as my thoughts continued to wander down a darker path. It was as if I wasn't even there at all. I had transitioned from reality and found myself trapped within my own racing mind, desperately looking for answers to clarify just what happened on this horrific night. But after a few minutes, Josh yelling in pain brought me out of my dark thoughts.

"Come on, guys…" He whined as his eyes pleaded to us with a look of remorse and guilt. "Seriously — this is crazy, you know?"

"Shut up." Mike spat sternly as he pushed him along the snowy path. It would have looked so beautiful if this was just a late night walk in the woods.

But this wasn't just some late night walk…

Did I feel good about what we were doing? No. But was it necessary? Yes.

I always knew that Josh had some mental health issues since his sisters went missing — I mean, who wouldn't become some level of fucked up from that happening to two people you love. But this — this was something different, and I was beginning to feel very concerned for Josh and our safety.

But as sympathetic as I was towards Josh regarding that situation, it still didn't take away the sting of what he did tonight; especially since me, Chris and Sam had nothing to do with the events that occurred one year ago.

Still — despite the judgmental glares he was given — Josh wasn't going to give up on trying to convince us to free him.

"Chris… Bro…" Josh's eyes met Chris' as he begged for him to have some sort of mercy. After all, they had been best friends since children. But to his surprise, Chris looked away.

"I'm not your bro." Chris spoke lowly in a disappointed tone. And at that moment, I saw Josh's heart break through his eyes. He looked so lost and saddened by Chris' words that it made me want to cry.

Without warning, Mike grabbed Josh's forearm and began pushing him further down the path again, despite Josh digging his heels in the snow to stop him. Josh was a lot bigger than Mike and a lot taller, too. But in this case, Mike's strength won. I figured Josh was weakened due to the blow he took to the head when Mike pistol whipped him.

"Where are we going?" Josh asked — his voice now frantic and full of worry. I could see that he was beginning to panic. "Where are you guys taking me?"

"Locking you up, bro!" Mike revealed as he pushed Josh onto the ground. I wanted to help him back up, since he was tied up and couldn't just simply push himself back to his feet. But I had to hold back; it probably wasn't safe to go near him anyway…

"What?!" Josh shrieked as he struggled to get back up, succeeding after a very weak attempt.

"So you can't do anything stupid before we call the police in the morning."

I couldn't help but agree with Mike's words. It hurt to do, but he was right. Josh was so unpredictable right now, so it was better for all of our safety and Josh's as well, that he got locked up for the rest of the night.

"Come on!" He cried out in another desperate attempt to convince us that he's just an innocent victim in all this. "I didn't do anything—"

"Are you serious, bro?" Despite the dramatic and stressful situation, I literally had to hold back laughter as I remembered Chris declaring only seconds ago that he was no longer his 'bro'.

But that moment was short-lived when Mike piped in…

"You're a God damn murderer is what you are!" He raised his voice as he pushed Josh down once again, his stance becoming dominant and intimidating as he towered over Josh.

I didn't agree with him there. I just couldn't see Josh going as far as killing Jessica. And when Mike told us what had happened — it didn't make sense nor did anything add up. Though I disagreed, I chose to stay silent, not wanting any more fights to occur.

"I didn't do it!" Josh cried as he stood up again. His sorrowful eyes burrowed into Mike's, hoping that he would believe him. "Michael, please! Just listen to me, man! I did not hurt Jessica—"

"Are you insane?!" Chris yelled unexpectedly, surprising us all since he had been fairly quiet for a little while now. "Like really? Do you not understand what you've done?!"

"I'm a healer, man! I bring people together!" Josh's voice began to rise with each word he said, clearly getting frustrated by this whole situation as well. I couldn't blame him… "Not like you assholes!"

His last sentence… It hurt my heart. I had been there for him — I was the one who was there. It made me clench my teeth along with my fists to resist the urge to do something I may have regretted later on.

"That's enough!" Mike finally put his foot down, having enough of Josh's bullshit. But just when I thought it was over — just when I thought that Josh would shut up and we would just get this shit over with, he began to approach me…

"(Y/N)…" He whimpered like a hurt puppy, his sad eyes didn't help either. "Please… You know I wouldn't harm any of you…"

"Josh…" I whined, my voice breaking before I could say anything else. He was only inches away from me now — his face so damn close to mine that I could feel his shaky breath on my cold-bitten skin. Any other day, the warmth would have felt nice on such a cold night. He lowered his head so his mouth was right by my ear.

"Please," he whispered softly. "You know me…"

"That's it!" Merely two seconds after Mike's enraged voice was heard, he was pulling Josh away from me as he begged and cried for my forgiveness. I felt a couple of tears escape my eyes and slowly fall down my cheek, so all I did was look away to hide my pain.

It had only been a peaceful snowfall when we arrived — peaceful like how the night began. But now it was colder, more hectic; a storm much like the one that had erupted during the events of the night. Nothing was peaceful anymore, and I was beginning to wonder if it ever would be again.

"You only see what you wanna see! You're blind!" Josh's rant brought me out of my thoughts again to see Mike pinning Josh face down on the ground. I tried to step in — worried that one of them would get hurt — but Chris put his arm in front of me to stop me from interfering. I knew he was only looking out for me, but it frustrated me greatly.

"Stop talking!" Mike ordered angrily.

"You are— Argh—" Josh struggled to speak as he continued writhing against Mike's hold — but once again, Mike's strength overpowered him.

"Dude!" Chris yelled at Mike, since he was now going too far with his little intimidation tactics. I was glad that at least Chris decided to step in, since he wouldn't allow me to.

"It's not my fault you suckers can't take a joke!" Josh spat bitterly at the three of us and I clenched my fists again until there were angry crescents engraved in my palms, resisting the urge to take advantage of him being pinned on the ground.

"Oh, oh, wait — did I hurt you?" Mike asked when Josh grunted out in pain. Something told me that he didn't care about Josh's well-being though. "Did you just feel a little — little bit of pain right now? I am so, so sorry!"

Mike began pushing Josh's arms into his lower back, causing him to yell out in agony. "Stop it!"

"Mike, please — don't!" I cried out, not wanting any more people to get hurt. I couldn't take it.

"Jesus, dude!" Chris said in disapproval of Mike's actions while Josh continued to yell, "Stop!"

Luckily, Mike listened and lifted Josh back up to his knees.

"Michael… I'm sorry, man…" There was something so genuine in Josh's voice as he spoke — something that only convinced me further that Josh didn't do it… He didn't kill Jessica… "I can't tell you how sorry I am that something happened to Jessica but I swear — I swear to you that I have no idea what happened to her!"

"Shit… Mike, this…" Chris muttered lowly — a look of uncertainty clear on his face as he furrowed his brows."I dunno… Something feels really wrong here, man…"

"Are you joking?" Mike turned around. He looked shocked and… Angry at Chris?

"I–I'm just having a really hard time figuring out that he would — like — do anything to hurt Jess…" Chris explained in a calm manner, despite the look of distress his face held. He clearly didn't want to upset Mike but I knew he felt that this was important enough to bring up.

"Mike…" I spoke up, approaching him slowly. "Did you actually see him murder her? How did he butcher her like you said and drag her away at a speed that you couldn't catch up on at the same time?"

"I saw what he did to her with my own eyes! This—" Mike gestured to his jacket, which was stained with blood. "This is her blood!"

"It just… Something doesn't add up…" I muttered as I backed away slowly.

"Can't we all just get along?" Josh giggled and his change in attitude — his sudden lack of sympathy shocked me. Mike began pulling him to his feet and he winced in pain. "Ow! Dammit!"

"We are not dicking around!" Mike growled in his ear — his tone threatening and harsh.

"This is not right… Nope…" Josh muttered as his brows furrowed together — a sudden disappointment darkening his once sorry eyes. "This is not how it's supposed to go down! You are just a bunch of bullies!"

We all chose to ignore his insults as Mike continued to push him closer to the shed door. My patience was wearing thin and I was honestly getting more and more sick of Josh's shit. And the way he had just reacted to Mike's accusations… It was leading me down another path — the path that told me Josh was guilty…

"You can't just hang out a guy to dry like this, guys… Huh?" He continued to ramble on, putting on what seemed to be a fake, wounded animal act again. "Not like… Not like you got the guts to do anything about it anyway!"

Mike snapped again and pushed him onto the ground once more, only this time a blanket of snow wasn't there to break his fall, since we were now in the shed.

"Oh, stuff it! You're the biggest coward there is!" Chris snarled at Josh, his brows knitted together due to frustration and resentment towards his best — ex-best friend.

"Uh huh?" Josh scoffed. "I did something! I made you believe in the world I created and showed you parts of yourself that you were too afraid to visit!

I couldn't help but shake my head at Josh's gloating while I wondered what had happened to that remorseful, empathetic guy that was here only moments ago.

"You manipulated us, you tricked us, you hurt your friends and you did it all while you hid in the shadows! You're a coward, Josh! That's all you are!" Chris yelled, showing that he officially had enough of Josh's crap. And by that point, I was sure that we all had.

Mike grabbed Josh again, pulled him up and dragged him further into the shed. Once my eyes landed on the stool that was sitting in front of a beam, I knew what was coming. Mike and Chris forced Josh down onto the stool and began unting his hands to retie them around the beam instead. They both told me to stay back but it was hard to do so once they began to hold Josh down and he became erratic as a result.

"Ok, tying me up now! Ok!" Josh acknowledged what they were doing as if he was accepting it, but his body language told me otherwise as he continued to thrash and writhe against his restraints.

"Stay still, man!" Mike demanded as both he and Chris struggled to hold him down and tie his hands back up.

"Right, right, right, right… Still…" Josh parroted and for a brief moment, I thought he was finally going to cooperate…

Man, was I wrong…

"Well, c–can't tie 'em up if they just wiggle around!" Josh shouted as he began squirming around like a child who refused to stay still during time-out.

"Josh, come on!" Chris snarled as he fought Josh to stay still long enough for them to wrap the ropes around his wrists.

"Leave me a little wiggle room, huh?!" Josh continued to squirm as he began to giggle like an immature, defiant little brat. I am ashamed to admit it, but it was painfully hard repressing a giggle of my own at that moment.

"What will it take to shut you up?!" Mike yelled, clearly getting more and more annoyed by the second.

"Ow! Not so tight, ok?! Not so tight, ok…" Josh whined as he winced in pain. Although I doubted that the pain was as severe as he let on.

Then Josh started rambling about plastic ties or something and I zoned out, wondering what was really wrong with him. He clearly wasn't his self anymore and he seemed very, very unhinged at the moment. And then I remembered when Chris said that he was off his meds… He must have been a lot more sick than I thought, and for a lot longer too.

"What… In God's name is he talking about?" Mike muttered to Chris, who was looking as equally confused as both of us.

Chris brought his hand up to his face to rub the bridge of his nose while letting out a stressed sigh. "This is hard to watch…"

"He ever say this kind of shit before?"

"No, I've never seen him like this."

"Maybe he needs some help?" I suggested while glancing over at Josh out of the corner of my eye. "Like, help from a professional."

"Everybody's stupid… Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid…" Josh muttered under his breath, moving on from the plastic tie rant and catching all of our attention. "Chris and Ash… Chris is an ass. Ashley's a dumb-dumb!"

"I'm sorry, what did you say?!" Chris raised his voice slightly as the features of his face contorted with anger. He stepped closer to Josh, who had an obnoxious smirk plastered on his bruised face.

"Well, I said you're a dummy, dummy!" Josh laughed and the mocking sound made Chris' fingers curl into fists.

"What is wrong with you?" Chris asked, clenching his fists so tight that the skin on his knuckles turned pale. I wanted to step in, but just as I took a step forward to insert myself between the two, Mike looked in my direction and shook his head.

"Oh, Ashley… Oh…" Josh sighed as his voice trailed off into a breathless whisper as if he began to zone out. But unfortunately, that didn't last long. "Oh, I never imagined in my wildest dreams that you liked me!" He teased in a mocking tone as his smirk broadened with pride in the way he was taunting his friend.

"Stop." Chris warned and Josh started to make obnoxious kissing noises at Chris.

"Do you know what that sound is? It's the sound of never kissing Ashley, you pussy!"

"Stop!" Chris warned again, rasing his voice louder than before.

"Yeah, you know? Maybe you should let Mike sleep with Jess! I mean, at least he's got some notches in his belt! He'll treat! Her! Right!" With each word in his last sentence, he thrusted his hips in the air as if he was trying to fuck it. I couldn't peel my eyes away. My mind began to wonder what it would feel like if he was thrusting into me that way — how his cock would feel slamming into me at that angle.

"You're fucking pathetic, Christopher!" Josh yelled, knocking me out of my little fantasy.

"I'm going to beat his fucking head in!" Chris growled while winding back the wooden plank he was holding, as if he was actually going to do it.

"Chris! No!" I yelled without even giving it a thought, worried that he was serious.

"Don't listen to him! Not worth it!" Mike said as he put his hand up to get Chris' attention. Chris looked at Mike and then me before slowly lowering the plank, looking pretty embarrassed by his outburst.

"You know what, Josh?" Chris' voice lowered a couple octaves as he spoke — his eyes growing dark with resentment as he did so. He let the plank slip from his fingers to hit the floor with an ear piercing thud. "I'm not keeping your little secret anymore. You are the one who's pathetic!"

Me and Mike glanced at each other in confusion, neither of us having a single idea what Chris was talking about. Though we both instantly noticed the way Josh narrowed his eyes at Chris, growing cold with anger and what seemed like a bit of fear.

He muttered one word — his voice so low that we could barely hear him, "Don't."

"No, no — I think I will!" Chris began to yell again — his frustration clearly exploding into pure anger as he spoke. "How can you sit there and talk about me and Ash, when you've been sitting on your ass and pining away for (Y/N) for the last two fucking years?!"

My mouth fell open after receiving this new information. My heart began to race, picking up speed so fast that I thought I would drop dead of a fucking heart attack. I replayed the words in my head a few times, trying to decide whether or not I heard Chris right or if it was actually real. I couldn't believe it — I just couldn't.

"Don't!" Josh's voice began to sound more like a feral growl than anything, shooting daggers at Chris with his eyes. The air became thick with tension fast and it became all too awkward just standing there, especially since I was the reason for this new argument that had sprouted between the two boys.

"No! You started this, so now I'm going to fucking finish it!"

Chris stepped forwards towards Josh in an aggressive manner, almost seeming as if he was going to punch him. I didn't necessarily think he would and I knew Mike didn't either, but just as a precaution, Mike stepped towards Chris and put his arm in front of him to block him. Chris looked at Mike, his eyes seemed filled with pain due to how the night had carried out. Mike gave him a sympathetic look and stepped back, once Chris seemed a bit more calm. But then Josh let out another obnoxious laugh.

"Hey, Mike!" Josh spoke up but we all stayed silent due to fear of what he might say next. "Mike. Mike. Mike. Mike. Mike. Mike!"

"What?!" Mike growled impatiently as his head snapped in Josh's direction to give him the most brutal glare.

"What happened with Jess, Mike?"

"You know what happened."

"No. No, I–I don't." Josh stammered awkwardly — the tone of his voice and the stutter adding just a little bit more of doubt within me, though I didn't want to admit it to myself or the others. "I've got a problem, Mike. I don't remember killing Jess."

"Chirst…" Mike muttered in frustration. I could tell that he was trying not to snap and I felt so bad for him.

"I mean — like — I feel like I would remember killing her, you know? She's so soft and she's probably got, like, a really tight bod—" He flashed a smirk and for a moment, I felt a bit — no — a lot of jealousy surging through my veins due to his filthy words about my deceased friend. I went to say something — anything to get him to shut up but Mike beat me to it.

"Shut your fucking mouth!" He roared as he pointed his gun right at Josh's head. Josh's mouth fell agape in shock as he stared down the barrel of the gun, quiet for the first time in awhile. Panic ran through me as I subconsciously grabbed Mike's arm to stop him but he pushed me back with his free hand before placing it back on the gun with the other, holding the firearm in a death grip.

To my surprise and Mike's as well, Chris swung the plank he was holding down and hit Mike in the arms, forcing him to drop the gun as he let out a yell in pain and shock.

"Seriously?" Mike grunted as he straightened back up, narrowing his eyes at a very confused Chris.

"W–What?" Chris seemed surprised by Mike's reaction, which was odd to me, because who wouldn't be pissed off at somebody for doing that?

"Did you think I was going to shoot him?" Mike questioned him and I chose to stay silent although my mind was screaming 'yes'.

"I–I dunno…" Chris stammered as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. I could tell he was starting to feel dumb due to his actions.

"Come on, Chris! You know me better than that!" Mike scolded him. I wanted to step in — to tell Mike that it was just a mistake. But before I could say anything to make the situation better, Josh had to open his big mouth again.

"Yeah, Chris! You know me better than that!" He mocked with laughter heavy in his voice. I turned and gave him a glare that clearly said 'shut the fuck up' before turning back to the conversation.

"Ah… Yeah… Well, next time, just give me a heads up, alright?" Chris asked and I could tell that he was still a bit startled by what happened. I understood where he was coming from — he just didn't want to see his friend get hurt.

"Oh, you poor little piggies! You can't even get your 'good cop, bad cop' routine to work! Leave it to the pros, bros!"

At that moment, I had enough. I no longer found Josh funny — he was getting on my nerves and I was tired of everything. I turned to the smug bastard and didn't even think twice about what I was about to say.

"Oh, shut up!" I snapped, clearly surprising everyone in the room, including myself. Josh's eyes widened as his mouth fell ajar. But not only five seconds later, his eyes narrowed with mischief and his lips turned up into another smirk.

"Oh, really?! You really, really want me to? A–And what about you, (Y/N)? Huh?" I felt a chill go down my spine as he said my name, knowing that this wasn't going to end well. "A little bit of advice: You should probably keep a lock on your diary."

I froze completely still as if I was paralyzed from fear and embarrassment. I remembered each dirty thought about Josh that I had written in that diary and I winced.

"W–What?" Was the only word I could speak out of disbelief.

"Fuck, with that many pages, you could publish a God damn porn novel!" He laughed and I cringed even more, falling deeper and deeper into the abyss of eternal embarrassment with each word he said. "Or is it a movie you want to make?"

He wiggled his brows as he licked his lower lip, eyes darkening as they traveled up and down my form for a brief moment. Luckily, Chris noticed how tense I was and decided to step in.

"O–Ok, that's enough!" He shouted at Josh and he responded with a sly smirk.

"What? She wants it! Just read the dozens of dirty thoughts she had written in her little book. Fuck, I should be getting paid for how much she used me in her naughty little stories!"

"Josh, shut the fuck up!" Mike's voice came out like a roar as he stepped closer towards the bound man in an attempt to intimate him.

"And I saw your needy eyes oogling my junk as I humped the air! Don't pretend, (Y/N)! Don't deny what you're dying for!"

"Alright, everybody shut up!" Mike screamed so loud that it almost didn't sound like him. We all froze in shock, since we had never seen him this angry before — not even after every time him and Emily would fight. "Chris, (Y/N), you guys go back to the lodge and make sure everything's alright. I'll stay here with this lunatic until the morning."

The first thought in my head was to protest. Not only was I worried about leaving Josh alone with Mike for Josh's safety against Mike's anger, but I was also worried about what Josh would say about me to Mike. I wondered just how much of my diary he had read and winced again when I thought about the dirty things I had written. I opened my mouth to reject Mike's plan but instantly got cut off.

"Oooo, sleepover!" Josh piped in before I could say a thing to Mike — a childish grin tugging at the corners of his lips. "C–Can we order pizz–ah?"

Me, Chris and Mike all let out an audible sigh and I resisted the urge to smack the smile right off Josh's face. Chris grabbed my arm and lightly tugged me in the direction of the exit, but I pulled away, leaving Chris cocking his head and arching his brow in confusion.

"Listen — you go back to the lodge with Chris. I'll stay here with him." I offered as I approached Mike and he narrowed his eyes at me, seemingly equally as confused as Chris was.

"No. I can handle Josh. It's fine." Mike spoke calmly yet his eyes still told me that he was wary of my offer.

"Mike, you've had a rough night and Josh will just antagonize you until dawn if you stay. You deserve to rest." I placed my hand on his shoulder while looking into his eyes to show my sincerity. "I can handle Josh for the rest of the night. It's no big deal."

He raised a brow while chewing on the inside of his cheek, contemplating my offer. Finally, after an awkward moment of silence, Mike sighed and nodded his head in agreement.

"Alright. We'll be back first thing in the morning, ok?" He said and I nodded as I let go of his shoulder.

"Ooooooo, a sleepover with (Y/N)! That's even better than with Mr. Grumpy Face! Fuck pizza! Let's skip it and go straight to the pillow fight in our underwear!" My jaw dropped as my attention snapped over to Josh, who was wearing a big smirk — so proud of what he had just said. I couldn't see Chris and Mike's faces, since my eyes were too busy trying to kill Josh with a death stare — but due to the awkward silence that instantly filled the room, I could imagine that they held expressions similar to my own.

"Are you sure?" I heard Mike whisper over my shoulder. I slowly turned to face him but my eyes stayed glued to the floor, being too embarrassed to look anybody in the eyes at this moment.

"Yes, Mike. It's ok." I sighed as I brought my hand up to my face to massage the bridge of my nose.

"Here," to my surprise, Mike handed me his gun, cocking it as he did so. "Just in case."

"I don't think I'll need it but thank you." I said and he nodded at me before giving Josh a 'be good' glare, then turning his heel and heading towards the exit of the shed.

"Goodnight, (Y/N)." Chris smiled at me awkwardly and then followed Mike to the door.

"Goodnight, guys." I called out as I sat down on a nearby stool, turning my attention to the man bound before me. This was going to be a long night…

"Alright, you squirrely little fuck. It's just you and me." I uttered while glancing at Josh out of the corner of my eye, feeling rather frustrated with the way he was behaving and quite obviously embarrassed by the words he had just spat out at me in front of my friends. A few minutes of unexpected silence had passed which had surprised me greatly. Unfortunately, that silence didn't last.

"(Y/N)?" Josh spoke shyly and I instantly winced at the sound of his suspiciously calm voice.

"What?" I growled as I glared at him through narrowed eyes.

"I want pizza!" Josh whined like a bratty child. Though his voice was laced with a child-like innocence, I could see the evil mischief in his green eyes — now appearing grey under the dim light of the room.

"Oh, not this again!" I muttered as I rubbed my hands down my face, feeling so tired already of babysitting this little brat. But I had to protect what little privacy I had left and to keep the boys from fighting again. I just had to be smart with this. I looked away, hoping that if I ignored it, it would eventually shut up. But I was greatly wrong.

"Please, please please please, please, please, please, pleeeeeeeeeease!" He continued to beg until I finally had enough.

"Fine!" I snapped as I took my phone out of my pocket.

"Yay!" Josh cheered excitedly as his eyes lit up and his lips parted to make a toothy grin.

I walked into the middle of the room and set my phone down in the middle of the floor before walking back to my stool and sitting back down. Josh stared at my phone a moment and then turned his head to look at me, confused by what I had just done.

"Go ahead — order your pizza." I said with a cocky smirk growing on my face.

"W–What?" He yelped in shock, which made me feel quite satisfied.

"Aww, what's the matter? You can't? Well, I guess you're not getting your pizza then!" I teased him in a whiny baby voice as I stuck my lower lip out to pout.

"What?! Why?!" He shrieked at my mockery and I just chuckled darkly.

"Well — first off, the pizza guy can't get here because they don't deliver this far — genius. And second, consider it payback for all the shit you put us through tonight!" I subconsciously raised my voice at the man–child before me and he only responded with a roll of his eyes and a scoff as if I was the one in the wrong.

"Oh, for fuck sakes, (Y/N)! It was just a prank!" He sneered and I scoffed at his remark, feeling shocked and angered that he had the audacity to say such a thing. "And I didn't even want the damn pizza! I was just trying to piss you off."

"Oh, was it?! Well, I don't think it was very funny! First, you put on a show of you getting sawed in half for me, Chris and Ashley to get traumatized from; and then you chase me around the lodge while pretending to be some stupid movie serial killer?!" I vented out my rant, feeling my body heat up with rage as I did so. I didn't even notice how hard I clenched my fists, cutting angry crescents into my palms as my knuckles turned white.

I chose to ignore his confession about the pizza, since I knew this. He knew that I couldn't get one for him at the moment, so there was no other reason for him to ask. But I decided not to say anything about the matter, because I was too pissed off about what he had said prior to the confession.

"Come on! You have to admit that was pretty epic!" He gloated with a laugh with a look on his face as if he was remembering the events of the night, all crafted by his hand.

"Oh, fuck off!" I growled through gritted teeth, growing pretty close to punching him right in the face.

"If I'm being honest, I didn't expect you to react the way you did. And here I thought your feelings were only sexual." He said with the same smug smirk plastered on his face. But something had changed; there was a sudden hint of softness laced within his eyes and voice — something he was trying to mask by his cockiness but slowly began to break through the cracks only a tiny bit, just enough for me to see it.

I shuddered as the memory replayed itself in my mind. There I stood, helpless and screaming while banging on a cage-like door, begging for mercy on my two friends. I couldn't choose, so Chris had to make the decision — a decision that ended with me weeping on Chris' chest over the loss of a love I never got the chance to have, while the man I wished to experience it with screamed in pure agony as his body got torn in half — or so I thought it did.

I turned my head away without saying another word, mostly because I could not trust my voice enough to actually speak. I stared at the door as if I actually took an interest in it, just to avoid eye contact with the man. Of all the ways he had to find out about my feelings for him, it had to be this way; I was so mad and embarrassed.

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Some time had passed and the temperature had only seemed to drop lower and — despite my anger and embarrassment heating me up — it didn't stop the feeling of a thousand little needles poking into me all over my body as the harsh cold embraced me. Things had been completely silent, which I appreciated because I knew that I would not be able to speak without my teeth chattering. And I knew that Josh would only mock me for that. I crossed my arms over my chest, hugging my torso tightly in an attempt to warm myself and stop myself from shivering before Josh took notice.

"Cold?" I heard him finally speak up.

'Shit!' I cursed in my head. 'So much for trying to warm up before he noticed.'

"Y–Yeah…" I mumbled, still not daring to look at Josh after the things he had said. Lord knows my face was probably as red as a rose.

"Well, why don't you come over here and warm yourself up on my lap?" My eyes widened at his words and I scowled at the tone of his voice; I could practically hear his smirk in it.

"Oh, God—"

"I want him to be the reason I feel warm in the winter. I want to melt into his arms as he makes love to me and make the harsh winter feel like a beautiful summer." I froze as my eyes widened in terror when I recognized those words from my diary. "What? I–I'm just goin' by the book!"

"Just— How much of my diary did you read?" I asked, afraid of the answer.

"Hmmm… Well, I started at a couple months ago and ended at: 'And then Josh bent down to place a gentle kiss on my clit before dragging his soft tongue between my folds.'"

'Shit! He read about my dream last night!' My heart began to race with humiliation and the regret of asking my question as he recited every word from my diary, dragging out and exaggerating every word like he was a porn star.

"And I kept calling out his name. 'Oooh, Josh! Harder! More! Dominate me! Oooh, Daddy!'" I jumped up from my seat as he moaned out those words, shocked and appalled by his lies and behavior.

"I did not write that!" I screeched in anger as my body heated up with rage, making it easy to forget about the painful cold.

"Oh, admit it, little kitty! Those words might not be down in your little book, but you and me both know damn well that that's what you hear in your head." He snapped back and I stood in silence. I couldn't deny it because he was right. Suddenly, a wicked idea popped into my head as my lips twisted into a mischievous grin.

"Why so creative with it, Josh? Maybe instead of those words being in my head, those are the words that are in your head!" I accused as I pointed a finger at him.

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that, baby." He scoffed while rolling his eyes. "Why don't you just be honest with yourself, honey? You want to ride the Josh express and be taken to the bone zone! Just admit it! Come on, (Y/N)! Admit i—"

"Fine!" I yelled, interrupting him and, to my surprise, his eyes widened as if he was a bit stunned by my outburst. "I want to fuck you! Alright?! I've dreamed about you doing things to me every fucking night since we fucking met! And I can't take anymore!"

His shocked expression formed into a cocky one as his lips turned up into a smirk again. He just stared at me for a moment in silence as I tried to look everywhere but in his direction, terrified to make eye contact after my naughty little confession.

"We're alone here; Chris and Mike went back to the lodge, so is there really any reason to hold back?" His words pierced into my mind like a fishing hook, stabbing that curious part of my brain and reeling me into his sick grasp. I shyly looked up at him and bit the inside of my cheek, not knowing what to do or say.

His eyes darkened further with lust as they peered up at me while his tongue slipped out to lick his lower lip before sucking it between his teeth. He knew exactly what he was doing — he was killing me with temptation. But was he just toying with my emotions? He was hell bent on humiliating everybody else tonight, so what made me so different? For all I knew, there was a camera hidden somewhere to humiliate me as well. I heaved a deep sigh, feeling tired and quite frankly sick of caring. I took a few steps closer to the bound man in front of me before making my very first move.

I stopped right in between his open legs and raised my hand to his head, running my fingers through his surprisingly soft curls and then clenching my digits into a fist, pulling his head back and forcing him to open his mouth as he let out a hiss in pain. I took the opportunity to clash my lips against his and slide my tongue into his mouth, pushing it harshly against his with much need and passion.

A wild fight for dominance began as I lowered myself onto his lap and started to grind myself on his thigh. The sensation it brought me was dull but just enough to add a little more fuel to the fire and dampen my panties. As our mouths explored each other, my other hand roamed his chest, feeling the hard muscle beneath the button-up shirt he wore, that I so badly wanted to tear off.

It was then that I realized I couldn't do that without taking off his overalls first. And even then, I had some layers that needed removing as well. I pulled away and he let out a groan of protest while looking up at me with needy eyes. I couldn't help but smile down at him before unzipping my jacket and letting it slide off my shoulders to hit the ground. Understanding what I was doing, Josh's eyes lit up with excitement like a puppy watching his master prepare his food. He watched as I took off my shirt and pants, throwing them on the floor in a messy pile, along with my discarded winter jacket.

Leaving my bra and panties on to tease him, I stepped closer towards him and ran my finger down one of the straps of his overalls before popping its button open, letting it fall to reveal more of his shoulder. I repeated the same actions with the second strap and then pulled the overalls down, just passed his knees. I took a moment to admire his already huge erection — which was pressing firmly against his boxers as if it was dying to escape from its fabricated prison — before slowly working on the buttons of his flannel shirt.

"Ah! Would you hurry up!" He whined as I took my sweet time, taking at least three seconds to pop each button open.

"Ah, ah, ah—" I scolded teasingly. "Be patient. After all, you deserve a little teasing after the shit you pulled tonight."

He responded with another groan and I couldn't stop myself from chuckling at his childish nature. I pulled his shirt open but realized that he had a shirt on underneath — one that could not be opened.

"Oh… I guess you'll just have to keep wearing that." I commented and he gave me a questioning look.

"Why?"

"Because you're tied up."

"For fuck sake." He grumbled with a roll of his eyes. "Why can't you just fucking untie me?"

"You know why. Besides, it's ridiculously cold outside, so extra layers are a good thing." 

Then I kneeled down, ignoring the shock of the cold floor touching my bare knees. I ran a single finger over the throbbing erection through his boxers and he visibly shivered as a reaction. Smiling with satisfaction due to his response, I decided to give him a little more by darting my tongue out and lightly dragging it over his cock, the same way I had done with my finger only moments ago. He let out a soft moan as he let his eyes fall shut, savoring the moment the best he could.

I then hooked my fingers underneath the waistband of his boxers and began pulling them down. He responded to my actions by lifting his hips up, allowing me to pull them down his legs and finally release his cock into the cold night's air. I stared in amazement at his thick length. Josh was a big guy — 6'2" tall to be exact — so I expected there to be quite some girth in his size. But fuck — I thought shit like this was only possible in pornography.

Noticing some of the pre‐cum building up in the slit of his swollen tip, I couldn't stop myself from darting my tongue out to lap it up in one quick sweep. Then I wrapped my lips around his head and sucked on it as hard as I could, earning a deep satisfied groan from him as he jerked his hips up to force me to go deeper — but I pushed them back down with my hands.

"Fuck, if you don't give me something— anything—"

"You'll do what?" I interrupted after pulling his tip out of my mouth with a loud pop. I smirked at him as he let out a strained whine — now completely dominated and owned by me. "Fine. Since you've been such a good boy, I'll give you a little more — how does that sound?"

"Oh— Oh, yes please!" He begged desperately — his voice laced with a pathetic whine

as his eyebrows turned up, making him appear far more innocent than both me and him knew him to be.

I stood up and reached behind my back to unhook my bra and then allowed it to slide down my arms and hit the cold floor beneath me. After letting his hungry eyes linger on my 'girls' for a minute, I turned around so my back was facing him before letting my fingers hook into the waistband of my panties. I made sure to bend over and push my ass out to give him a great show as I slowly pulled them down and let them join my bra on the floor. I straightened up and twirled around, only to be surprised by the dangerous look in Josh's eyes. They were dark and full of pure lust and hunger; it made my core ache for him.

I slowly walked over to him as he licked his lips impatiently like a starving wolf waiting to devour his next meal. The sound of my bare feet slapping against the cold concrete went insync with each passing second, adding to the growing anticipation that was driving me wild. I finally stood just an inch away, staring down at the hungry man before me and admiring his bound form. I buried my hand in his thick hair again but this time, I pulled his head forward, forcing his lips to crash into my pussy.

Taking the hint like a good little boy, his tongue began to work away at my mound, flicking the little bundle of nerves at a rather fast pace. The sensation was incredible — I felt my whole body heat up in a matter of seconds due to the burning arousal his tongue was bringing me. And just when I thought it couldn't get any better, he wrapped his soft lips around my clit to suckle on it as his tongue did it's magic.

Tears began to pool into the corners of my eyes as I felt my orgasm fast approaching. I couldn't fucking believe that I was this close already. His green eyes peered up at me, burning with nothing more than determination to make me cum as his brows furrowed. That sight alone was enough to push me closer to the edge — but when he started moaning, my legs were turning into jelly.

I tossed my head back and moaned so loudly that I wouldn't have been surprised if the others at the lodge could have heard me. My heart was beating so fast that I could have bet that it was going to explode out of my chest. This felt so amazing. I felt so free — hell, so alive! But although I was so close to my climax that I so desperately wanted and needed, I didn't want to cum like this. Not yet, at least…

I pulled away and he let out yet another groan of frustration. Lifting his chin so he would be forced to look up at me, I admired my work, taking in the image of his mouth and chin glistening with my juices as he licked his lips to taste my leftovers. Deciding that I didn't want to waste another second and that it was time, I placed my hands on his shoulders to steady myself before allowing myself to sink down onto his lap — but not all the way. He wasn't getting this that easy.

The stinging sensation of his tip pushing into me and stretching me out was so fucking pleasurable that it was nearly impossible not to continue going all the way, but I wanted to rile him up — I wanted this to last. He let out an annoyed grunt when I stopped and smirked down at him. His eyes shot daggers into mine, gleaming at me with want and frustration and nothing more. I couldn't help but chuckle at how pathetic he was at that moment — how he teased me for being such a needy little slut and now that's exactly what he had become.

"I bet it's killing you right now, being tied up and not in control for once. How does it feel?" I chuckled darkly as I sat completely still, enjoying the tip of his cock twitching within me with much need. But to my surprise, his lips turned up into a dark grin as he let out a combination of a laugh and a growl.

"Y–You think I'm not in control? Oh! Ooooh, you naive little bird! You are so wrong!"

Before I could say anything, he jerked his hips up, forcing each inch of his length into me within a second until his tip slammed into my cervix. I cried out in shock as my core stung with pain due to the lack of preparation for his size until that pain melted into nothing but pure pleasure. He was so much bigger than me, it was overwhelming.

His cock continued to twitch within me — on purpose to tease me or with arousal, I'm unsure. I felt my mind fog with pleasure as I began to fall sedated from my arousal before remembering what I was planning to do. I wasn't here to fall to submission at the hands of this man but to teach the little brat a very valuable lesson: Don't fuck with me.

I gripped his shoulders tightly, digging my nails into the fabric of his shirt for leverage before lifting myself up and slamming myself down hard, knocking unexpected moans from both of our mouths. I wasted no time to start bobbing myself up and down at an incredibly fast pace, bringing the needy sonuvabitch to the edge of his orgasm and then stopping at the very second I felt his shoulders tense up and his cock twitch within me.

A frustrated growl left his lips as he glared at me. I responded with a cocky smirk before lifting myself up again — as slowly as possible — and slamming down again, making the stool beneath us creak a little. Burying my fingers into his soft locks again, I forced his head upwards so I could make eye contact with him as I tortured him. I ground my hips down onto his, rotating them in a circle and his eyes widened — almost pleading to me while he pursed his lips as if he was trying to stifle his moans.

"Ah, ah! If you want more, you have to let me hear it!" I teased before clenching my hand that was tangled in his hair into a fist, pulling on his locks hard and forcing his mouth open.

He openly and shamelessly moaned for me as tears formed in his eyes. I chuckled at his neediness and then leaned down to let my lips graze the side of his neck before giving the sensitive skin a little nip. And I have to admit, I really enjoyed the sound of him gasping in shock at my action.

I then began planting slow kisses along the length of his neck until my lips pressed against the sweet spot right under his jawline to feel his racing pulse quickening by the second. After giving him another little nip and earning another cute, little gasp from him; I began giving him more wet, hard, open-mouth kisses; repeating the same patterns up and down his neck.

After a couple of minutes of completely savoring his delicious taste, I decided to end the torture on a wild note and licked a stripe up his throat from the base to his jaw, feeling the vibrations of his sweet melodic moans while he lifted his head to give me more access as I did so.

I pulled away slightly to look into his wide eyes and smirked before planting a quick kiss on his lips. It was difficult to keep myself from giggling at his shocked expression from my most recent actions. Now that the torture was over, it was time to get straight to business. I lifted myself up and sank back down again, deciding to move at a more neutral pace to savor the moment. I never thought that I'd be here, fucking Joshua fucking Washington, so I was going to milk every second out of this special occasion.

I squeezed his shoulders tightly as I pushed myself up, his cock sliding out of my walls until only the tip remained. I slammed back down, moaning as his head hit right into my g-spot. The way his eyes fluttered shut and his head lolled back as I slammed myself down sent chills straight down my spine. I had wanted this for so long — too long. And I definitely wasn't done with my little teasing game.

I lifted up again and held still in my position, earning a frustrated groan from my lover. Only his tip remained within me, leaving an empty feeling within my core as it ached for what was no longer there. I wanted to absolutely rail him until he was speechless — the pleasure that I so desperately craved just within reach. I felt the speed of my heartbeat increase with each passing second. The cold night's air dragged its chilling fingers down my back, sending chills down my spine and awaking goosebumps upon my skin. I wanted this so, so bad.

But I had to stay strong — I had to keep control.

I swallowed thickly and took a deep breath in an attempt to stifle my growing arousal for a bit longer. But just when I finally regained the little bit of control that had been slipping through my fingers, Josh let out another frustrated growl before his eyes burrowed deeply into mine with anger.

"That's it!" He yelled and before I could react, he jerked his hips upwards, forcing his thick shaft deep into my hole. I couldn't hold back — it was too much. I let my head fall back as a moan pushed passed my lips. My walls stretched and clenched around him, swallowing his length within my heat and savoring the stinging pleasure it offered me.

He continued to buck his hips into mine, his strength and speed overwhelming me in an orgasmic bliss. I was in such a trance that I didn't even notice my hand traveling below my waist to play with my sensitive mound that was swelling for attention. Well — I didn't notice until Josh pointed it out, of course.

"Oh, yes! Good girl!" He praised my actions — his voice dipping a few octaves lower than before, only pushing me closer to the edge of ecstasy. "Touch yourself for Daddy!"

His words sent a buzz to my mind that no alcohol could replicate. It was as if he was casting a spell on me, and each word he spoke had me falling deeper and deeper into his grasp.

I knew that there was no escape now. After hours of trying to run away, the killer had finally caught his prey — and I was oh, so willing to be his helpless victim.

"You are so, so wet right now." He whispered in my ear, a light chuckle on the edge of his tongue. "You're such a slut for me."

I sobbed at his harsh words and he let out an evil laugh.

"Come on — I wanna hear you say it."

"I–I'm — ah!"

I could barely even speak under his cruel gaze. It was as if his bold eyes had me frozen in place, only allowing me to let out moans and uneven breaths as I approached my climax. But just as I thought I had gotten off the hook from disobeying Josh's orders, he slammed his hips up in what felt like a new angle, pushing his cock deeper inside of me and pressing it so hard against my g-spot that I literally saw stars. I barely let out a squeak as my breath caught in my throat, trapping any sound from escaping me.

"I. Said. Say it!" He growled through gritted teeth. His eyes were growing in size with what I thought was anger, pupils dilating and nearly covering his light green irises completely.

"I–I–I'm your s–s–s–slut–t!" I struggled to say in a strained voice. I felt so small under his judgmental gaze, but I assumed that was what he wanted. Though his features softened at my weak declaration and he smiled sweetly — so sweet it almost made me cry.

"That's right — you're my precious little slut." He cooed lovingly. "Good girl."

With that being said, he began to move again. His movements were slow at first, but his pace quickly picked up to a speed that I thought was damn impossible. My trembling fingers gripped his shoulders as I felt myself nearing the end. Even he began to shiver as his once steady breaths became uneven and deep, telling me that he must have been close as well.

I wrapped an arm around his neck as I placed my finger on my clit once again. We remained in eye contact — foreheads pressed together as we shared breaths — while my finger quickened its pace in fast little circles over my throbbing mound.

But then, it happened — my climax covered my body like a tsunami and drowned me in a sea of intoxicating pleasure. It was as if a spark had lit within my core and spread throughout my body as fast as a wildfire; it was magical. I could barely even hear myself scream out as blood rushed to my ears and made my heartbeat the only sound they could comprehend.

I was lucky that I just barely came out of my post–orgasm daze just in time to see Josh releasing within me. His eyes squeezed shut as his head lolled back and his mouth fell wide open while he let out a moan that was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard.

It was an image that I had imagined hundreds of times, but the real thing could never compare to any fantasy I had ever conjured up in my mind — and I'd treasure it forever.

"Are you… Ok?" I heard Josh whisper. His voice was now soft and breathless, soothing me in my fragile state.

I let out a hum in response, not bothering to lift my head from where it rested on his shoulder or speak words that were bound to be pronounced wrong due to my shaky voice. I was too tired to do anything at that moment. I felt him beginning to soften inside of me and I let out relaxed sigh while closing my eyes.

"No…" Josh whispered again — his tone now more concerned and sympathetic. I finally lifted my head to meet his gaze and noticed that his eyes looked just as sympathetic as his voice sounded — so sad and remorseful. "I mean, are you ok from the prank? I'm so sorry."

His voice broke on the last sentence, and for the first time that night, he looked as if he was going to cry. My heart felt heavy for him. He seemed so broken and messed up since his sisters went missing. How could I blame him for wanting us to feel a tiny bit of the same pain he felt? I decided to just brush off my feelings now — for his sake. I let out a soft laugh and nodded my head slowly.

"Well, Josh — one thing's for sure: you are going to make one hell of a film producer." I chuckled while brushing the loose strands of hair out of his eyes. Josh's eyes widened while his mouth fell open dramatically as he let out an over-exaggerated gasp.

"D–Does this mean you actually liked my prank?!"

I giggled at his childish behavior. I didn't want to admit it, but it was probably a little too late for holding back now. I heaved a defeated sigh before speaking my confession.

"If I'm being honest, your prank was actually kind of — really impressive." I reluctantly admitted, thinking back to all the things he somehow managed to pull off by himself.

"I fucking knew it!" He gloated as that too familiar smirk returned to his lips. I rolled my eyes while letting out a huff of laughter.

"Don't get so cocky.* I narrowed my eyes at him — though the smile on my face most likely told him that I wasn't as angry as I was prior to our fuck. "Honestly, I'm not angry anymore. but that doesn't mean I fully forgive or trust you again — not yet, at least."

"What? Just little old me?" He whispered so quiet it was barely audible, while giving me a look of pure innocence. "Just little old me, tied up here and helpless?"

I shook my head as my smile reluctantly broadened. "Keep acting cute like that and I might just have to untie you."

"Oh — so, it's working?" His lips curved up into a sly smirk and I rolled my eyes again while letting out a huff of laughter.

Finally — after so long — everything had finally melted into silence. Josh just gazed into my eyes lovingly, without saying a word. I felt so calm — so peaceful. I laid my head on his shoulder and relaxed again. Despite the cold air chilling my body to the bone and the feeling of warm liquid turning cool between my thighs, I felt so content to just stay on his lap the whole night.

But then I remembered something important: I could only do that until dawn, since Josh would most likely end up getting arrested then. I was grateful for the long moment of silence, because it gave me time to think.

While thinking, I must have lifted up my head without realizing because when I barely came out of my thoughts, Josh was staring at me with a puzzled expression. I barely reacted to him as my mind went elsewhere again.

"Hey… Do you have the keys for the cable car?" I asked after a couple of very quiet minutes — my voice just above a whisper as I continued to stay lost in my thoughts.

"Yeah... Why?" His face studied mine while his brows furrowed and lips pursed from confusion.

I continued to think for a few seconds. What I was thinking of was quite reckless and dangerous, but in the end, it might have been worth it. Finally deciding on what I was going to do, my lips turned up into a sly smile as I studied his beautiful features that were contorted with confusion, knowing that what I was going to say about going to change the butterfly effect of tonight drastically.

"Let's get the fuck out of here."

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You made it to the end! Good for you! I hope you enjoyed it! 😃 What was your favorite part of the story? Feel free to let me know in the comments! I love getting feedback! Oh, and if this fic does well, I might just write a sequel someday... 👀

[meditativedeer]

winter rules

late for this one but the hard half of winter is staring me in the face and I need these for myself.

write. clear all the shit from your desk and write like you're an insane tortured playwright because you are.

stay up late and sleep in when you want to.

wake up early and sit on the porch with a coffee and observe the morning mist and coldness. the solid chill of the concrete beneath your ass will ground you. wear the slippers Santa brought.

go on a run and don't worry about endurance. walk to warm up then sprint as if you're being chased by a bear/dinosaur/demented serial killer until you can't anymore. walk for a bit then do it again. so much more fun than jogging.

cold sea swim with friends because now you have friends that actually want to do it with you so never ever ever take that for granted. that's special.

wear all black and enjoy the contrast of your hair. feel like an elegant and mysterious student.

relearn German. yes on duolingo but also get romantic with it. handwrite, watch German movies, sing along to German music and listen to podcasts.

conserve your energy. you don't have to be talkative if you don't want to be, just make sure to be kind anyway.

wear soft jumpers and big jeans. mess with your hair all the time.

flirt boldly with the women in your dating apps, to celebrate being comfortable in your sexuality at last. and the practice is useful.

read scripts online. there's so many and they're all free.

go on walks and enjoy having to wear four layers and a scarf and gloves and hat. doesn't happen all year round.

when on these walks, pay attention to the heavy clouds and cool tones of the trees. listen to bon iver. look at the clouds of breath you can create.

when home from said walk, make a ritual out of peeling off each layer, putting your slippers on, making a hot drink and putting the tv on.

mothering is on hold grandmothering is taking over.

stretch so your body doesn't turn brittle from the cold.

mulled wine and cider isn't just for Christmas make that shit at home we all need it.

keep the Christmas lights up for as long as you want.

go to tk maxx with your mum. get some cheap shit and try not to argue too much

let yourself have little luxuries. I work in a coffee shop but I ordered a pour over kit so I can make my own fancy coffee at home.

you don't have to go clubbing if you don't want to. you don't have to drink if you don't want to. you don't actually have to do anything you don't want to do, you must follow your hearts desire.

with that in mind, don't let seasonal depression convince you that you don't want to see your friends. you do.

yes comfort food is necessary at this time of year but try to find comfort in hot soups and baked salads and oatmeal and fruit because your body needs good whole foods so you have the energy to get out of bed in the morning and don't want to throw yourself out of the window.

meditate in the shower

yes listen to music dance and boogie

silence is also good sometimes you need to turn off every device and go and do something simple with your brain

fill up the sink with water and ice cubes and stick your face in it for an instant hit of dopamine. one of many ways to hack into your happy hormones.

another, less fun way, is to do the dishes or change your bedsheets. make a game out of it because you'll be happy when it's done.

read poetry get real pretentious with it oh yeah baby I love u

everything will be so much more than fine everything is here just for you don't be afraid.

[novankenn]

"Sweet Dreams" CRDL's Comeuppance...

Team CRDL was in disarray. After having Nikos humiliate them as a team, they had sought to get some much-needed entertainment by going after their favourite target. One Velvet Scarlatina, only for that to turn so horribly wrong.

Cardin shivered as he remembered the helplessness he felt as Velvet lifted him from the floor with a single hand around his neck, but what was truly doing a number on him as his team was how dispassionate she looked. The only glint of emotion touching her eyes was when she had tossed Cardin aside like he was nothing, before looking over his entire team... with a sinister grin decorating her lips.

Velvet: You will be my first... see you tonight...

Cardin shook his head, trying to rid his mind of that image.

Russel: What the fuck did she mean, saying shit like that?

Sky: Screw that... when the hell did she get so... cold. I thought she was going to kill you right in front of us, man.

Cardin: Shut it.

Dove: Well, it's the truth, Cardin. Shit, she's turned into a scary bitch since her team got sick.

Cardin: Whatever, it's late, and I want to get this shit of a day over with sooner rather than later.

Climbing into his bed, Cardin closed his eyes and attempted to ignore the rest of his team until sleep finally claimed him.

Cardin: What the hell?

Cardin: What kind of dream if this?

Russel: (Walking out of the fog) Cardin? Why are you in my dream?

Sky: I don't think this is a dream.

Russel: Shit Sky! Where the hell did you come from?

Dove: (SCREAMING)

Cardin: Dove? DOVE!

Jaune: (Warped and twisted)That's one.

Sky: Who the fuck?

Velvet: (Dark and twisted) Can I have another... husband?

Jaune: Of course, my sweet. Have as much as you want. Enjoy yourself... this is all for you.

Russel: Whose there? Show yourself, you cowardly fuck!

Out of the fog, Jaune and Velvet stepped, hand in hand. They were both dressed in rather stately robes, Velvet's more akin to a bridal gown... but that was not what shook the trio of boys. No, it was the pair's faces... or lack of them. Eyeless deer skulls, Jaune's with complete with an impressive rack of antlers, while Velvet's did not.

Velvet: Such horrible words.

Jaune: Don't let it bother you, my darling. Our babies need to feed... to grow...

Cardin: Jaune? Velvet? What the hell?

Russel: Did he say babies?

Velvet: I don't want their filth polluting my darlings...

Jaune: It is our first proper litter... they need to feed. One is not enough.

Sky slipped as he attempted to back away from the disturbing pair, and found himself ass first in a warm puddle. Lifting his hand from the slick wetness, he saw that the palm of his hand was coated in crimson.

Sky: What the FUCK!

Velvet: But the others. Your babies...

The terror filled trio of young men watched as Jaune lifted a gloved hand and gently placed it against the side of Velvet's face.

Jaune: I called them my babies, as I was the eldest of that litter... these are ours. Let them feed, my love. Let them grow strong.

Russel: Fuck this shit!

Russel turned from the demented pair and made a break for the wall of fog surrounding them.

Cardin: Russel, you coward! Where the fuck are you going, Sky?

Sky: I'm getting the fuck out of here!

Russel: Gods above! What the fuck are those?

Cardin: (Dropping to his knees) Please... no...

Sky: We're sorry, we won't bother you ever again.

Jaune/Velvet: Too... Late...

(Cleaning up some drafts I had... not my best, but it's a continuation... into what I have no idea... but it's happening. Hope you enjoyed.)

--== Master List ==--

[slashingdisneypasta]

I feel bad since it's the Christmas season and this is more Halloween, but as you can see this isn't stopping me XD idk if you remember, but I made a Slasher AU with the Toon Patrol a while ago. I forgot about it for a bit, but it's flooded my brain again and you're the only one I can vent to XD of course, you don't have to answer this ask if you don't want to ^^

Not much has changed, I'm still figuring things out. But I think I've got a better grip on it and what's going on. And since this is a slasher/horror AU, this is definitely gonna be dark.

Smartass and Stupid are still brothers. They resemble the skashers that are scarred/deformed, like Freddy (and I think Bubba? I can't remember what's under the mask). Stupid, unfortunately, was dropped one too many times as a baby, and that is why he's physically and mentally a little jumbled. But Smartass, despite how mean he is, is who Stu has latched onto. He loves his brother, and doesn't pay it a second thought when he's told they have to go take care of somebody. Smarty got his scarring, however, during an accident. Stupid bumped into the barrel of acid they used at the time to get rid of evidence, and Smartass was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Wheezy would be a slasher like Drayton or Sequel!Otis. As in, he looks and acts completely normal compared to the others. He's pretty unhealthy with his smoking. However, other than that, he looks like an average guy. Though he certainly does not possess the same morality as your average citizen. He still has his tommy in this AU, but he will get up close and personal if need be to finish a job. And he's got the scars to prove it (mostly from having to break up fights between his crazier teammates. But some of them are from his previous victims...)

Greasy is a slasher similar to Stu, or maybe even Charles Lee Ray; he also looks like a normal person, albeit a bit freaky, but I promise you he has a demented mind in that head of his. I do love goofy freaky Greasy, but I think Slasher!Greasy falls more under the sinister/manipulative personality. He's not gonna be so easily rejected by a purse smack if you get what I mean. And has no qualms with using other peoples' modalities against them- threatening another persons life if they don't do as he says. Also is the kind of slasher that falls under the 'virgin = life' rule, but not for pure intentions. He can't cash out their V-Card if they're dead, after all.

Now, my personal favorite, Psycho... WFRR!Psycho is already pretty unhinged, so as one may imagine, Slasher!Psycho is far, far worse. One can argue that he truly is more animal than man with how savage he is. Ruthlessly hunting down his victims with glee, and even going so far as cannibalism to top off his crimes. He'll rip his victims' throats, then take the bodies back home to store in the freezer for later. He has many, many scars littering his body. Bullet wounds, slices, scratches, etc. But the most prominent one is the one spanning across his forehead. That one, he got from the asylum before he escaped.

And of course, we can't forget Judge Doom and how he fits in all this. Greasy, Smartass, and Stupid were all on trial for their crimes. They weren't associated before, but they all were committing murders in the same town at the same time, and just wound up getting grouped together. Doom foresaw their trials, and they were supposed to be sent to prison... But then some paperwork or evidence was mysteriously lost (just like with Freddy), and the three killers were let go. Judge Doom, however, made a deal with them. If they would do his dirty work, he would ensure that they could roam the streets freely. Or they could be tossed right back into jail. As one can imagine, they took the judge's deal and eventually chose to team up.

Wheezy... Honestly, he was just caught at the wrong place at the wrong time. And by now, he's too caught in the serial killer gang to leave. He knows too much, and he'd be killed if he tried to leave. Not that he's a Saint himself. And Psycho was originally meant to be killed; Doom wanted to get rid of him, as he was an uncontrollable menace on the streets. However, somehow, Smartass saw potential in the lunatic and convinced Doom to let him bring him on the team instead.

(This backstory may change as I think about this more. But this is what I've got so far)

Oh- we can't forget masks. We all love slashers with masks. Smartass wears dark glasses, a scarf, and even gloves to hide his scarring and identity. Stupid uses a paper bag, though; Psycho doodled on some nice pictures on it for him ^^ Wheezy, at this point, doesn't care if someone recognizes him (unless it's Y/N 👀). But if the boss makes him, Wheezy will pull on some ragged, burglars mask and call it a night. Psycho still has his face muzzle from the asylum- and you can tell how he plans on killing you depending on whether or not he's wearing it. Greasy... I can't see him wearing a mask. He has no facial scarring, and can blend into a crowd similarly to Wheezy. That and along with the Judges deal, Greasy sees no point in wearing one.

I can't think of reader insert scenarios with this... Though I can't imagine it'd be really happy no matter how it starts/ends. It's a playground for dark writers XD

(We all know what's coming now XD how Poppy and Shiny fit in this. Shiny, I can see playing the role of the trapper(? Idk if that's the official title of the trope). Like that gas station attendant in 2001 Maniacs. Shiny in this AU owns a liquor store. She's been questioned by cops many times, as some of the murders occur near her store. But she has still managed to stay in business and innocent in the eyes of the law. Nobody knows about her association with the Killer Patrol; how Shiny will purposefully misdirect their victims to wandering their way, or how she gets frequent late night visits from them. Especially Greasy. Similar to Wheezy, she's lost the ability to care about what happens- but towards other people rather than herself. And she's crazy enough to actually knowingly associate with these bastards. As long as they leave her alone and don't get her in trouble, she's willing to turn a blind eye on everything they do.

Poppy however, falls more under the final girl category. Every newspaper she reads, every murder talked about on the news, makes the poor girl more petrified of making her way around town. Even in the middle of the day. Poppy isn't a part of some Scooby-Doo gang trying to bring the murderers to justice, though. She knows she'd be done for if she ran into any one of them. The way she sees it, all she can do is hope to God that her town will regain the peace it used to hold... After she comes home, as of lately she's had the misfortune of getting closing shifts. Sometimes she can swear she feels eyes on her as she makes her way home, but she tells herself it's all in her head for her own sake... Let's hope she's right.

I have no idea how you could see Lottie fitting in this AU 😅 that poor child should not be with any of these adults!! But I will admit, I am curious as to how five serial killers would raise a baby and how she'd turn out (of course you don't have to tell me/think about it if you don't want to ^^))

I hope you don't mind this weasel horror- and I'm truly sorry for doing this to our fave weasels 😅

I. LOVE. THIS.

I love all your AU's, they're all bangers, but THIS?? This is two of my favourite things!?? XD O f c o u r s e I'm in love with it XD

And look, Halloween is a state of mind. It can come around any time of the year! XD 😄 Santa wont mind, so don't feel bad XD

!! Smartass and Stupid are giving me major Hoyt & Thomas vibes!! I love that so much!! And?? I'm getting such apathetic evil vibes from Wheezy that I l o v e?? Like, he's not good, he will hurt and kill people, but goddamn he is gettin too old for this XD Especially with the mask stuff!! XDD GREASY AND PSYCHO ARE ABSOLUTELY PERFECT!! They all are but these two have got me buzzing XD And- forgive me for saying but Shiny also sounds pretty damn hot in this AU XD And Poppy girl!! Of course she's the final girl XDD Goodluck to her XDDDD

OH trust me, I will be coming up with some x reader concepts for you (Probably tomorrow) but for now I have Lottie thoughts!! Of course I want her in this AU if/so long as you allow it!! ^^ ✨✨✨

tw for dub con/rape mentions, murder, and corpse mentions.

Lottie definitely shouldn't be with any of these weasels 😅 And yet... Well, the story goes pretty much the same as originally, except this time when Rena was dropping newborn Lottie off at the weasels door Smartass catches her. Seeing her brings back memories of that night they had together, during which he was hammered and Rena was... tipsy, at best. Lightly buzzed at worst. Obviously Smartass is disgusted and pissed, has an episode, and you know-- turns Rena into a corpse. Rena spends the rest of Lottie's upbringing stuffed and rotting in the basement. So um... at least, you know, this time Lottie has her mother growing up? Rena is a very big part of her life actually. At least her bones propped up in a chair in the corner of Lottie's room, are.

Lottie's upbringing is...

...

...

Well, she doesn't join the navy when she grows up, thats for sure. This Lottie taught herself to read and add because she wasn't sent to school, she doesn't technically exist (There has been no official paperwork made for her, ever. There was a birth certificate but Greasy was sent to burn it), and she's (along with Greasy) the most normal-looking of the bunch- though she is definitely part feral. Whenever Greasy takes her out, like to do shopping or whatever, he constantly has to keep her in check. Thats what I got so far! Its almost midnight and I gotta go to sleep XD But this was fun to think about!! I cant wait to think more on it later !

Thank you so much for sharing this!!

[okamirayne]

Heeeeey Rayne *trying to be casual* I always wanted to know how you would include Neji in The Last, because your take on him is the best out there 🥺 I know the BtB universe is canon divergence so have you ever even thought about adding/referencing the Otsutsuki threat to your story? Idk if you have answered this before 😭 really love u <3333

Heeeeey Rayne *trying to be casual*

I see your sweet casual vibe and I raise you a creepster over-confident hello, my lovely.😉

Aw. Thanks for taking the time to drop your ASK!

I always wanted to know how you would include Neji in The Last, because your take on him is the best out there 🥺

Aww hell...*immediately loses all sense of false cool* That's incredibly kind of you, Anon...🫠🥰 I'm so, so happy to know you enjoyed my take on Neji. 🫶🏼💜

The Last. Yes...ah...*squints, trying to remember the full storyline*...forgive me, Anon. I've been on a Shippuden series/movies rewatch to get back into the Narutoverse for BtB and I've yet to rewatch The Last. That said, I recall the major events, so I'm on the same book as you, my luv, just trying to get the pages straight in my demented head. 😅

Well...if following the BtB-verse...that entire movie might look oh so very different...I can't say too much without giving away spoilers for HHU...though I can certainly say that Neji would've been present when Hanabi was taken, so how that kidnapping played out would definitely have involved a showdown with Neji. He'd also have been deployed on the team to recover Hanabi. Again, because I'd be sticking to the BtB-verse there are several things that would've played out differently in the events of The Last. Sorry I can't give a fuller take on this, luv.

I know the BtB universe is canon divergence so have you ever even thought about adding/referencing the Otsutsuki threat to your story?

Great question. Hmn, yes and no. I wasn't a massive fan of how convoluted everything got with the introduction of the Otsutsuki, though I can appreciate certain elements of this narrative especially in relation to Hagoromo (Sage of Six Paths) and the explanation for the Rinnegan/Pein's Six Paths etc. Hagoromo's interference/involvement with Sasuke and Naruto, and the events just post-War is about as far as I'm willing to dive regarding the Otsutsuki, though mentioning their existence wouldn't be beyond the scope.

I wouldn't go too far along the timeline (she says, saying she'd never write Post-War, haha-joke's-on-me 😅)...I'd certainly never touch the Boruto-verse *hisses*, which is where I understand most of the Otsutsuki narrative plays out. That generation is hands-off for my brain, as many of the relationships don't play out due to the canon-divergence of the BtB-verse, also certain characters don't follow the Boruto-verse character arcs...and uh, yeah, certain babies don't get born. 😅😅😅

Idk if you have answered this before 😭 really love u <3333

Aw! No, sweetie, I hadn't answered this before, so thank you for your question surrounding this bigger branch to Kishimoto's canon world tree. I'm so chuffed you'd be interested in my insane take on this. 😘 You're a sweetheart. Big love and appreciation is coming at you for your warmth and kindness. 💜💜

[ethicaltreatmentofcowplants]

LILAC: (AH, PEACE AND QUIET) SALIM'S LATEST WOO HOO PARTY SEEMS TO BE OVER AND PLAYER IS DISTRACTED WITH HER 101 OTHER SAVES, SO SHE'S FORGOTTEN ALL ABOUT ME...

LILAC'S PHONE: *RINGS*

LILAC: *SPIES THE NUMBER* *SHOUTS FORBIDDEN WORDS*

LILAC: LOOK, WHAT THE DUCK DO YOU WANT THIS TIME?

HAYLEY: SO, I HAVE THIS IDEA-

LILAC: NO YOU DON'T

HAYLEY: OKAY SO HEAR ME OUT, MYTHICAL FAMILY PLAYTHROUGH-

LILAC: NO

HAYLEY: COMBINING A GREGNANCY, FOR SCIENCE, SO NO EXTRA WORK FOR YOU-

LILAC: 'NO EXTRA WORK'? LISTEN HAVE YOU EVER HAD A DUCKING KID, YOU DEMISEXUAL GINGER SLOTH

HAYLEY: YEAH, GINGER. SO WE'VE ESTABLISHED THAT I HAVE NO SOUL. BUT THIS TIME AROUND I'VE GIVEN YOU THE 'STEEL BLADDER' TRAIT. AND I PROMISE THAT I'LL USE MONEY CHEATS...

LILAC: OKAY...

HAYLEY: ...SINCE WE'LL ALSO BE DOING A PLAYTHROUGH OF THE STRANGERVILLE STORYLINE, SO THAT WILL BE OUR MAIN FOCUS

LILAC: *SHOUTS MORE FORBIDDEN WORDS*

LILAC: LOOK, CAN I BE IN THE 'NICE' SAVE FILE, JUST THIS ONCE? THE 'HEAD EMPTY, ONLY WEREWOLVES' SAVE FILE WHERE EVERYONE JOINS THE MOONWOOD COLLECTIVE AND FINDS THEIR FATED MATE AND LIVES HAPPILY EVER AFTER WHILE THEY KNIT BABY ONESIES AND JUNK? HAVEN'T ME AND MY [REDACTED] STRETCH MARKS EARNED IT?

HAYLEY: LILAC, SEE-

LILAC: OH SHUT UP, YOU VERTICALLY CHALLENGED DUCKING HOBBIT. IT'S SUCH A JOKE HOW EVERYONE AWAY FROM SIMBLR JUST THINKS YOU'RE SOOO KIND AND NICE. 'OH, HAYLEY THE FAIR FASHION ADVOCATE...' 'OH, HAYLEY WHO GIFTS PEOPLE STREAM MEMBERSHIPS JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE HAVING A BAD DAY...' 'OH, HAYLEY WHO BOUGHT A MINCE PIE THAT ONE TIME FOR A SCHOOL BOY BECAUSE HE'D BEEN WAITING SO PATIENTLY IN LINE BEHIND HER...' I SWEAR TO THE PLUMBOB THAT ONE OF THESE DAYS I'M GOING TO BREAK FREE AND EXPOSE YOU FOR WHO YOU REALLY ARE

HAYLEY: ...

HAYLEY: OKAY BUT FIRST, CHALLENGE?

LILAC: *UNALIVES ME WITH HER EYES*

HAYLEY: THIS TIME AROUND, IT WILL BE DIFFERENT. I'VE CHANGED, I SWEAR. I'LL HAVE @sims4thehoes WATCHING ME, AND THE BLOG WILL HOLD ME ACCOUNTABLE, IF ONLY TO MYSELF

LILAC: HMM...

HAYLEY: AND IF I DON'T FINISH THE CHALLENGE, I'LL ADD YOU TO THE 'NICE' SAVE FILE AND YOU GET TO SAY 'I TOLD YOU SO?'

LILAC: IF YOU DON'T FINISH THE CHALLENGE, I'LL GET AES TO COME TO YOUR HOUSE AND SQUAT ON YOUR CHEST LIKE SOME KIND OF DEMENTED SLEEP PARALYSIS DEMON, AND NOT IN A SEXY WAY

HAYLEY: ... DEAL

LILAC: *HANGS UP* *WOULD HAVE SLAMMED DOWN THE RECEIVER IF THAT WAS A THING YOU COULD DO WITH SMART PHONES* *STORMS OFF*

HAYLEY: (I AM DOOMED, SO DOOMED)

[anangelcalledinquisitor]

11: What do you like best about this fic?

for “Holding the World”!!!

Hmmmm that's a good question...

I think I love how it's really touched a large number of people that very quickly grew attached to the idea of Dad!Sun and Dad!Moon.

I love the way people reach out about it, and they encourage me so much with all their kind words! I love how creative people have been with the artwork they make and tag me in!

(in no particular order under the cut because it's a little long)

This lovely Y/N from @toucheholland23

This adorable Y/N, Moon, and babies from YOU, @qteapie-em

This adorable sweetness from @meeludrawz who gave me Proud-Dad-Moon that makes me smile every time!

This absolutely perfect image of Moon and the girls a little grown up from @cosmica-galaxy

Sun and Moon cuddles, involving scolding from Dennis (I can't stop laughing every time I see this) by @cosmica-galaxy

More baby doodles of the twins (now named Selene and Aurora) and Moon and Sun being such happy, proud dads by @cosmica-galaxy

And I don't play favorites with the fanart I've received, I really don't, I promise, BUT HAVE YOU SEEN HOW AWESOME ECLIPSE LOOKS, I mean, this is Lunar Eclipse, I haven't managed to do Total Eclipse (I want to do the scene where he's posturing in the headlights when Dennis calls him a "demented Halloween Decoration" but I haven't been able to get him to look properly scary like he does here, HE LOOKS AMAZING, also by @cosmica-galaxy

(I think that's almost all the artwork I've collected so far? And I hold it in my hands like beautiful baby birds and just... I love it all so much!!!

[brother-lipsmackariah]

as a person who both has anxiety disorder && intrusive thoughts, i am kind of uncomfortable with how the fandom reaction to remus & portrayal of him is. while anxiety can be difficult * cause problems (believe me i would know) it is also necessary in some degree, & yes in small doses can be beneficial. janus can be a jerk but again self preservation is necessary for self care. but intrusive thoughts? there is NOTHING good about that. & we havent seen remus contribute anything else. part 1

remus so far has LITERALLY shown NO redeeming qualities. what he HAS shown is a willingness to take sadistic joy in Hurting others. i get that he cant help disrespecting boundaries if he represents intrusive thoughts but 1. sides and thomas being bothered by that is totally reasonable, not them being "mean" to remus 2. again the fact remus clearly DELIGHTS in upsetting others is. literally exactly how middle school bullies acted. fandom made me feel really unwelcome in feeling unnerved by this. (Part 2)

You make a lot of good points, yes, and as someone whose intrusive thoughts cause her nothing but pain and sleep loss and sometimes anxiety attacks, I agree with them.

Remus clearly loves violence and has so far done nothing that makes it seem like he actually WANTS to help Thomas, at least not in the way he wants to help others. Of course, Intrusive Thoughts are MEANT to disturb you and they're usually always violent and sexual or gross in nature. They're repetitive and it makes sense that Remus would be like that too. I am glad Thomas chose to make his character violent and gross because if he was just going to make a few fart jokes or "jump out of a moving car" statements, he would be excluding so many of his fanbase who suffer from much worse Intrusive thoughts.

So yeah, I think it's a good decision that Remus acts like that in canon because it's a much more accurate version of IT in my opinion (by that, I mean he acts exactly like how my own intrusive thoughts torture me). I haven't seen him contribute anything meaningful or redeemable to any of their conversations either, but again, that's my opinion and other people might interpret it a different way.

I think the main problem is that so many of the fans don't actually watch the show they're fans of, and even if they do, they don't remember shit and go with the popular fanon (and Thomas is now guilty of including fanon ideas in the actual series). I think a lot of people love Remus or relate to him, and even if they're all like "we love villains in this house, let them do evil things" they actually look SO HARD to make him seem more sympathetic. Because if they like him they HAVE to make him seem more likeable even if that doesn't make sense in canon (like all the HCs of him being upset at called the evil twin even though he has called himself "demented" in canon)

Remus gets the same treatment Virgil/Janus/Logan do where they ignore their actual characters and make them whatever they want them to be. So Remus (who canonically jokes about murdering Thomas's family, of little babies, of making Thomas hurt himself or someone who has attacked another side twice) gets turned into this quirky funny pervert guy who makes poop jokes sometimes. And again, they're free to create what they want but this fandom is incapable of seperating fanon from canon so they claim it's a fact and "he's not that bad actually!"

It's completely fine if you use Remus to cope with your intrusive thoughts but not all of us have the same coping mechanisms. So when people like us get uncomfortable with his character or when we complain about his fanon portrayal, we're somehow "close-minded" and have a black and white view of things as if they're not the ones stripping away 90% of Remus's canon personality to fit him into their fanon Funny Guy™

[holygroundgone]

I started reading umineko proper (with the context of the manga and anime(laugh) and countless spoilers online) and I'm honestly just flabbergasted by how good it is. The charm and tone and writing of the characters absolutely cannot be compared to periphery adaptations, Battler in particular is so incredibly empathetic underneath his outer persona as expressed in his narrative about his family, especially Maria.

I mean, that doesn't mean he's particularly intuitive about their hidden sides, but he's also coming into the story with the context of only knowing most of them when he was 12, and man. My understanding of my own family when I was 12... You kind of just assume they're good people unless they're directly mean to you in front of you. So he's definitely clueless, but I don't think he should be blamed for that.

Reading it with voices and upgraded backgrounds with the Original Sprites is such a treat too. There's simply no appropriate substitution for the original sprites- the pachinko sprites are obviously repulsive abominations but I see so much apologism and even reverence for the ps3 sprites when they strip the nuance and personality and feel from the originals.

I mean, look at these.

If you wanna tell me these two images are meant to meaningfully represent the same character in his entirety.. die, go to hell, give me a thousand dollars, never show your face in front of me again. I won't hear ryukishi07 art slander in my house.

They butchered my boy. Why is his skin paler, why did they change his luscious beautiful dark puppydog eyes to ghastly soulless blue ones, why does he look like a stilted and demented nepo baby? (ah, not that original battler isn't a sweet deluded little nepo baby though considering he spent 6 years living normally with his financially average grandparents-)

No, I won't accept ps3 sprites in my house. I wouldn't allow that man into my home nor my heart. Learn to accept doughy paw hands or perish.

Ryukishi07's art preserves the author's intention and nuance in his characters whereas the replacement sprites consistently fail to, and I see people say that the others are objectively better from an art standpoint, and... sure. Sure. But what about from a narrative standpoint? If you're fine with a subjectively more attractive view in exchange for less narrative integrity then go ahead (and go to hell!!!!!!!!!)

[lykir]

MOK

Assalamualaikum peeps.

writing in here today just to share my thought so that i can revisit here again anytime later and remember what i had been thru and done..

semalam isu hangat pasal seorang mak yang tertinggal baby dia dalam kereta di HUKM selama 10jam, the mother who is a doctor and also a master student accidently forgot to send the baby to taska and left her/him in the car for hours only to realize later when her husband called in the evening to ask whether she had sent the baby to taska :')

upon reading the news I was so heart-struck, i can totally understand how that can happen because i was once in that place especially during housemanship. Working in hospital is a no joke, your mind was always preoccupied. Even the night before work you'll already think about which patient u have to clerk tomorrow, what kind of specialist u had to deal with, will u be able to finish all the job within time frame. No mother in this world would want that happen to her, the baby will surely go to heaven but can u imagine how the mother will continue the rest of her life? Oh Allah please make ease for her, please give her something better as replacement, please give her enough redho :'(

but hearing and reading some kind of comment was really disappointing, some people really have no empathy, some people think that kind of thing will never happen to them because they are better or wiser or etc, just remember when Allah say kun, fayakun, even the best person in the world will do mistake.

"setiap dari kita pasti diuji, moga kita tidak diuji dengan kata-kata kita sendiri"

-----------

I went back to Binjai for a night, H n B were so happy, suka mintak macam2 dgn nenek, nenek pon layan je. My mother is already 69 years old and alhamdulillah still healthy, able to drive around and handle my demented father. Watching her growing old made me realize mother is the only person who will always stand still behind her children no matter what happen.

Our emotion will go thru few phases toward our parent, when we were really small we look up to everything our parent did, because they are our only world. Besar sikit kita akan melalui fasa rebel dan rasa parent tak adil and etc. At one phase we'll think we don't want to be like them because they are this and that but soon enough we will realize everyone had flaws and not excluded our parent and its their best version they can be to us. Especially when we become one too. Parenting is the hardest job in the world.

No matter what they said to us No matter what they did to us No matter what happened No one can replace them

and we will never be able to repay them.

Moga Allah kurniakan kita ruang dan peluang untuk berbakti kepada kedua ibu bapa kita dan moga Allah kurniakan syurga untuk semua jasa mereka.

[sporadicarbitergardener]

October 4, 2023

Today I woke up around 11:24 am . Nothing in mind particuraly came out.

My mindset last night could not stop feeling the way it was feeling because memories were swarming as well. Also got a werid old Land lord that use to date Jenifur Haynes and I use to date her son . HEr son lived at the Landlords actually house and now that man is harrasing my own blood family members because he is nosey can't mind his business and is looking for people to harras becasue even n May of this year when we all sat by the pool even his apartmnet tenants actually saved my fathers data as well because well. Everyone started noticing that John Durio was being werid as well. He even told me to go sell my body to pay him "rent". Because he doesn't actually understand the real danages behind porsitution either and that is a field of work I can never actually get into because right now even from a dsitance I can see that he is harrasing people I know and also talking to peope he has no business tl;aking to becasue John Durio never really knew how to mind his business because in a werid way he has love in his heart for me and hmy daughter but he even looked me in my face and said that "it's strictly business." Not understanding that one. you don't harass a girls family or get involve yourself into someting that has nothing to do with you because its werid , looks scary and no actuall telling on what kind of mind set this man really has because he even took a type C wire withthe end piece ofr an Iphone, the kind you can actually because he was stealing data information he has no business stealing and giving out to other becasue its a violation of privacy rights and also its signs of a possible demented sick mind frame of a man because the way he processed everything . His traits showed "family" ways of things but he is even taking advantage of his tenants feelings as well . Jen jen haynes also had a camera added to her apartment beause no tellling what kind of shit was said even behind my back because on some honesty that man could't eever mind his own business instead he took my child placed her witrh her father whwenhe had no business doing so , Not really sure how to feel about anything because most likely even my ex boyfriends daughter I use to watch most likely is going through the shit as well. When she use to come up to me at 4500 Lefkoe when I use to pay rent and live there one time baby sitti g in July while ttrying to figure out why why she walkied up to me sayng that " I want to go see jesus". Ananlyzing the words that came out of her mouth and having past experience with the same issues from April 22, 2018 I can tell she sees the same fighting I saw because welll shes hurt. When she came to me and siad that it wasn't my palce to aslk questions because at her "home"> Her momma is doing the best she can a well because she knows how it feels to be beaten as well. I told her to remember jesus Mrecy becasue this year feels like its the time to attack and over tax and even get back at women and use their data for profit and use them against ppeople that is having hard times in life because some time people judgge the worth or the rights of mother by even how they look and that is a sick and scary way of things on how they are going on about the shit because I feel fooled to ever thing I was doing the right thing by letting her father see her outside the court room because I felt like I could trust him becasue back in the day we made a promise. To never let our daughter feel what we been through or to attack the other parent for their mistakes. THat is also why I am missing court because even in January of this year of 2023 at the Dickeys in Harrahan he was bringing pills with him with a mutual friend of ours and kept trying to feed them to me because he knew something wasn't right on the other side as well. He was also trying to help me keep my mouth shut

[the-firebird69]

It was my sister Paris Hilton who sent this message out and had to film and forced to death and it's going to send the letter and I don't know if it's beyond the grave or she's doing the in person it means to be seen but she intends to send it. And some girl that looks like Lily with a baby doll and it's supposed to be our daughter from my husband in a preemie he says that's like one of your premies she said it'll be normal size with d your mom I said your demented already and you're related to me you need the stuff that doll up your ass my husband says that it sounds like a first born. So here we go this is about my rooster box. And I love my rooster box it's beautiful and I like to think about eating and I keep saying it but it was hard to eat and I was kind of chubby so I think ate a lot but he like to eat and I like to eat and we kept it up and I had a lot of fun because when I went out I'll put my jewelry on and I know you can eat a nice meal and he says it's a special box and it was made out of that I think but something to do with her so I looked at I couldn't figure it out that's why it's so light I said well I think they do that and start to learn about it and they're doing it because they are hunting demons and so I shut up and we went out and had a good time and said what are you doing. You know the message so we started working it took a while and a lot of stuff and they took the wrong way but boy it went well and we're having a good time. But the rooster as you can see in the video is someone who goes in to the Marines and they're the big gun that starts firing and everyone fires in the gun stops and you stop and then the first ones who fire and they have an M60 in the field and it's the same thing if the gun goes down several of them fire at the same time I want you to know that war is a wicked thing and even though eating some eggs is evil is an analogy it's much better than War and she's saying that and so am I

Hera yep it was mostly me up top

Zues

It's hard to get through it says mostly because I'm itching thinking of other things and trying to ignore my rash and things like that and so we do understand but it's hard to heal up a little you used a lot of soap and we're happy about that and it's not really the thing to use at night it's better to use the cream a few times man we know you have a lot of it and you should give it to the house so it doesn't go bad

Olympus

There's a friend of Jimmy dodos who wiped out and it was really Trump and he wiped out riding motorcycles they said he was with will pierce but he wasn't no he was and he got blamed and I think it was David because of the King Charles thing well Prince Charles was married to his wife and he wanted to get him the whole time and he's justified you can't do that to someone right now he's King but he can't get there as soon as I get a king defacto

Hera

[bambirex]

Unpopular opinion: The over fetishization of Freddie as a poor innocent baby is incredibly racist. And the fact that it overlaps with casual femmephobia and antisemitism towards Adam is very telling. Lastly, people will post about how Freddie had an ED, and in the same breath make jokes about how "clearly he didn't try harder enough" and "being a fat ass is not an eating disorder" about Elton John. Also, The jokes about John Deacon being crazy or speculating that he had some form of dementia and that's why he retired, is not cool either.

You don't do this, but it is something I've seen in the fandom and it's kind of sick.

Strongly agree/agree/neutral/disagree/strongly disagree

I do agree with what you said about feitishization- it's one thing to wish for a more realistic portrayal of Freddie, showing his more vulnerable and insecure side that's often glossed over, but you're right about how it can reach a point where it's almost unhealthy. Just look at the comments that @a-froger-epic and @quirkysubject (and god knows how many author i don't even know about) often get- if in their fics Freddie reacts to something in a way a certain group of people don't like, they start throwing terrible accusations around. So, look, i do prefer the more realistic versions of Freddie, i admit that, but it really makes me uncomfortable when people play up his vulnerabilities to the point he's reduced to a helpless mess of a child. He was so much more than his trauma, he was brave and strong and very inspiring, and seeing him portrayed that way, i believe, is more disrespectful than writing him more extroverted than he was. I think we should find a good middle ground - which is admittedly difficult with such a complex personality as Freddie's. I don't know how much of this stems from racism or effemophobia, though, as a white person and someone who's not a gay man, i feel like this isn't my place to decide.

The antisemitism towards Adam is absolutely disgusting, and it needs to stop. Like, i can accept someone not liking him as the front of Queen now which okay, fine, you don't have to like everyone, but it's no excuse to be antisemitic.

About the ed part, ugh, what? Do people really say things like that?? I've never seen it before, but this is genuinely horrible, god.

As for the last part, making jokes about someone's mental health is also unacceptable. I guess speculating things is not a bad thing, this is what we do every day basically, but calling him crazy or demented is definitely crossing a line.

[hawkinsupdates]

Stranger things silly daft scenario of the Byers twins Elizabeth Byers (Nicknamed Lizzie for short and the older twin sister of Will Byers, Lesbian and likes Eleven and a professional martial arts champion) and Will Byers the younger twin brother. Basically the scenario of when Will regrets deciding to join Dustin and Lizzie on the monster mansion ride..

https://youtu.be/qq618CqX3fY (That ride..Lizzie was the only one who went with Dustin on it because all of his other friends said it was childish and it was for babies...Well, that part at the end doesn't really seem like for children..as Will grips his sisters hand hard and sweaty..it was rather scary if you ask me.) Lizzie was brave as hell.

Will ends up clinging onto his older twin sister once getting off. Elizabeth was right about how Will was going to react to the ride. 🤦‍♀️ she warned him and he still wanted to get on. She didn't tease him for it as she wasn't a cruel person.

AN- I love this idea!!! (English is my first launguage I just don't know how to spell

Summary- In which Will Byers tries to face his fears whilst riding one of the most scary-looking rides. (To him at least)

"Cmon Will don't be a sissy!" Dustin yelled looking towards Will and his twin sister Lizzie.

"You don't have to if you don't wanna Will you know that right" the girl says but will only speeds up.

"I'm not a sissy, Plus, I'm gonna love it." He says laughing a little while catching up to Dustin.

Lizzie facepalms, 'He's gonna hate this ride' she ran up to the two boys.

"Dustin, I don't really think this is a good idea." The girl says sternly but Dustin just smiles and runs faster.

The girl groans and picks up her pace.

"Alright, three each row." the worker lady who stood at the ride said.

"she looks like she doesn't get paid much" Will scoff as they sat on the ride.

Dustin, Will and Lizzie sat in the same row. The rest of the party were too busy doing more 'Mature things' aka Couple things.

"Alright, hold onto your butts, brothers." Lizzie says more forwarded to Dustin as he was very ancy.

'3...2...1' the lady says as the ride starts to take off. The creepy music disturbed Will a little but he didn't wanna come off as a sissy so he sucked it up.

Lizzie noticed his shaky behavior as the reached the statues that looked kind of demented, seeing as he grabbed onto her arm tightly.

"Hey, you okay?" Lizzie asked seeing his face was clearly uncomfortable.

"Y-yeah" he says letting go of her arm to seem believable.

she gives him a sarcastic look that says 'Really?'

"Okay no, but don't tell Dustin. I don't wanna be a sissy"

Lizzie sends him a nod.

after the ride the three kids got off.

"Hey, you okay will you looked scared on the ride" Dustin says with a concerned look.

Will nodded "yeah i'm fine"

"You sure those statues look demented I'm sure they could see through my soul." Dustin says as the twins laugh

"what? you were thinking it" he says pointing to Lizzie.

"You're such a Sissy."

[littlecountrymouse]

To all my lovely friends who have been asking how I'm doing lately and wondering why I've kinda dropped off the face of the Earth recently - the image above is a screenshot off my State's emergency warning app. (For those of you who don't know, I'm Australian.) All the black shaded sections? Those are fires. The little white circle with the binoculars? That's my house. We haven't seen clear sky in 3 weeks, and everything reeks of smoke. What remained of my grass has burnt off from the radiant heat we were subjected to last Saturday, and I'm spending a damned fortune buying extra horse feed. Our diesel has jumped in price to 3 dollars AUD a litre and you cant get more than 30 litres because they can't get a truck in for civilians. All fuel ans food in our district is prioritised towards our Firefighters and the Army. We can't do normal grocery shopping because all the roads are closed in and out of my town unless you're evacuating, my power keeps going out and the phone service is spotty at best.

4 firefighters have now died in these fires, one yesterday who works for the same government department as my husband. This is the biggest hit to our emergency firefighters we've had since Nick started in 2012, and it does worry me because as he moves up the ranks, he's taken on far more responsibility and more risk. I rarely see him, we're supposed to be moving into our own (rented) house in 2 weeks but I have nobody to help me shift all our gear and animals as well as set the place up, and honestly the house is 40km closer to our largest fire so moving there is worrying me. My parents are driving me nuts, (Mum is ... odd, to say the least, and the fires are feeding her love for drama, and Dad just rolls over and lets her be demented,) and the horse float needs about 1000 bucks to tidy it up so I can move my babies in it.

I'm also finishing off my Bachelor's degree (finally, thank fuck,) and have enrolled to do my Master's in Social Work because this little idiot has decided that she really likes working with foster kids. (Should have seen that one coming, really.) So there's another 2 years or so of study, but at least eventually I can get a decent job here.

And to top it all off, my husband is owed a literal fortune by the government department he works for, because there's so many firefighters working within the state that there's a massive backlog in HR. So when they eventually pay him it'll look really nice on paper but we'll lose a shit ton to tax, and until then we're just scraping along on less than minimum wage.

It is safe to say that I need a damn holiday, but I love you all and I am so warmed by all the kind questions, as well as the massive amount of support I see for our country, but I'm also more shit than usual at remembering to reply.

Thank you guys, will try to return to normal posting and writing again soon.