#dont shoot the messenger au

[princess--bongwater]

bro [is covered in blood] @skybristle

[snwusberry]

BERRY PRESENTS pl4yg1rl.com

pairing: seonghwa x oc fem!zahara

genre: strangers to lovers, social media au, humorous, crack (guys i'm funny)

rating: 16+

warning(s): sexual themes (if at all), language, suggestive

synopsis: seonghwa who has been single so the longest time, according to some sources, and it's made him a bit cranky so his friends suggest a website to him to "get that stick out his ass".

BTW: this is sort of based off the song pl4yg1rl by lolo zouaï. it's a really good song and i linked in the title of anyone is interested.

status: COMPLETE

whole of ateez ☆ chaewon (le sserafim) ☆ winter (aespa) ☆ ryujin (itzy) ☆ mira (oc side character)

profiles #1 ☆ profiles #2

☆ teaser

but before we start, please dont spam like :)

#1: i don't sell drugs

#2: BROKE PEOPLE SHOULD NEVER LAUGH

#3: life comes at you fast

#4: the copy paste mfs

#5: fan behavior

#6: i'm emo now

#7: taehyunswife335

#8: FUCK THE MATRIARCHY

#9: don't shoot the messenger

#10: ain't been to no damn miami

#11: 🍅🍅🍅

#12: am i the asshole?

#13: he's a good man savannah

#14: please i'm a star

#15: objection your honor

#16: why you so obsessed with me?

#17: he thinks i'm pretty

#18: I'M FREE

#19: i was just hungry

#20: #singleandhappy

#21: i was a fool

#22: copy paste mfs

#23: i wanna be famous

#24: this type of behavior will get your bones jumped [written]

#25: papa yeosang

#26: thank you pl4yg1rl.com

[swifty-fox]

Do you have any Clegan fic WIPS or idea/hcs you haven't shared yet? Getting #Clegan withdrawal :'(

lemme rustle through my bag of goodies

I've got my Sci Fi Au:

Entry Log 2043

-DateStamp: 14th July 5399

-Location: DeepSpace Sector G8677-65HG-76789_I

-Personnel File: Maj. J.C. Egan (Zoot Suit) 

Recording_

“This is Major John Egan, callsign ZootSuit, aboard the vessel M’lle ZigZag. Today is the dawn of my final day of exploration, putting an end to a sixteen-month foray into DeepSpace. Initial findings reveal little of note. A few developing stars and planets; an asteroid belt; and a total of six planets, two of which I will be recommending for a second more thorough exploration of due to planets possibly location being within the ‘Goldilocks Zone.’ I look forward to whiskey, solid food and to breathe air that isn’t recycled from a fucking can. I can’t wait to fuck my husband-”

John pauses.

“Ah, computer erase the last seven words. Reasoning: Irrelevant to mission. I will be entering Hyperspace within the hour, once I hit proper trajectory to slingshot around the primary sun.”

He taps the record button to end the log, carefully labeling the file and placing it in a folder with the few thousand other logs he’d recorded over the last year and a half. A verified library of data, observations and the occasional love-letter. A year and a half of research; one of the longest expeditions ever undertaken by any pilot. Considered bold by some and risky by far more. Deep space played with people's minds, the long stretches of isolation broken up only by Hypersleep creating the perfect recipe for a light case of mental instability.John had trained for this, ran through thousands of psychological tests and millions of scenarios. There was not a person in the universe more capable of this task. 

John rubs his jaw, feeling the scratchy beard and spins out of his pilot's chair, leaving the computer to guide the craft. 

Two Fingers down(Bikeriders AU)

“I don’t like liars.”

“I’m an honest liar,” John whispers against his lips

“You cheated.” Gale accuses.

“Cheating implies I was playing to win. Throwing the game to lose on purpose is different.” his hands fumble at Gale’s belt buckle, the metallic sound of it undoing loud in the alleyway. Gale sucks in a ragged breath.

“That’s not-” Gale groans as John gets his free hand around his dripping cock, “-even remotely what it implies. I don’t fuck cheaters.”

“You’re gonna let this cheater fuck you.”

“Is that so?” Gale's hips buck into the tight clench of John’s fist, his pubic hair darker than the rest, almost a sandy brown color.

“Yeah, if you call that cheating then I’m disqualified. Winner-” John bends over to spit onto the glistening head of Gale's dick, rubbing the saliva down his shaft, “-Takes all.” 

I've got my Pirate John AU which is just concepts at this point LOL

Little Beasts is still happening! Here's a snippet from part 4:

“You’re really hitting me in the ‘yes daddy harder’ places with that face you’re pulling right now,” John says, swirling his finger through the over-complicated mess of a coffee in front of him.

It tasted awful, but he ordered it just to see if the kid behind the counter could actually pull it off.

Chick continued to keep his ‘yes daddy harder’ expression, which was in fact a look of profound exasperation and disappointment. And didn’t really awaken anything in John, but he found it plenty amusing to see the way the older mans eyes narrowed ever so slightly.

“I could have you thrown in jail today if i wanted, you know,” Chick Harding takes a sip of his own soy latte, “I could make up a reason, I hold your life in my hands.” 

“That’s a misuse of power and a miscarriage of justice, and also you like me. I’m your favorite little POW just admit it.” 

“Someone’s going to pop you one in the mouth, mocking veterans like that.”

John spreads his hands wide in a dont shoot the messenger sort of gesture “hey, I can claim it. My great gandpops was a POW. Got his flight jacket and everything hanging in my closet. This is my history.” 

“I think I should arrest you.”

John grins at him.

“You been meeting with Brady?” Chick asks, setting his coffe down with a pleased hum, begins folding his utensils wrapper accordion style until the cheap paper has become nothing more than a little square. It’s the same thing he does every time, restless fingers the only betrayal that the parole officer wasn’t just a robot.

Which John already knew was false. He’d looked the guy up the moment he’d had access to internet again. Had a neatly sealed Juvenile record and an exemplary military record which meant the guy was both secretly interesting and also probably a little batshit.

“Every couple weeks just like those fascist fucks tells me too. Just like i meet you every six weeks and we pretend I’m in need of babysitting and you pretend you’re not hoping that college boy will finally write his number on your coffee cup.” John leans forward on his elbows,the table creaking under his weight  “I could do it for you, if you’re too shy.” 

Chick doesn’t give him the satisfaction of blushing, but John can see the way his sholulders straighten slightly.

“He even looks like me a bit too. Curly brown hair,” John smooths his fingers across his mustache, “ the sexy landing strip. You sure you’re not displacing some sexual attraction?”

“You are the devil incarnate. That barista means nothing to me.” 

“You shouldn’t be so grumpy, meeting your favorite little felon.” 

“Only person around here that seems grumpy is you, Egan.”

“Me?” John stretches, tilting his chair back with one foot until he nearly topples backward, “Whay’ve I got to be grumpy about? I’ve got a shitty dead-end job, a dying grandma who, by the way, isn’t actually even my grandma, and i’ve got to check in with some middle aged drill sergeant with a thing for some guy who looks like Sean Cody’s next up and coming.” 

“I don’t know what that even means.”

“Oh you so do.” John smiles.

[ao3feed-jonmartin]

[Podfic] Dont Shoot Stab or Otherwise Harm the Messenger

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/3XJ7rMR by Cait_does_Podfics The continent of Fear had been thrown into political turmoil following Queen Gertrude’s untimely demise, and the matters were complicated further by the fact that the crown prince Gerard remained stubbornly just as missing as he was before the Queen died.   None of this had anything to do with Martin.   None of this should have had anything to do with Martin, yet somehow here he was in the capital city, having dinner with Count Magnus as Duke Lukas's substitute.   Even in fantasy AU, Martin manages to lie himself into a terrible job. Podfic version. Will update weekly on Wednesdays (or sooner). Words: 0, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: F/F, F/M Characters: Martin Blackwood, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Georgie Barker, Melanie King, Alice "Daisy" Tonner, Basira Hussain, Tim Stoker (The Magnus Archives), Peter Lukas, Elias Bouchard | Jonah Magnus Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Georgie Barker/Melanie King, Basira Hussain & Alice "Daisy" Tonner, Sasha James & Tim Stoker Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Kingdom, Nobility, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, Martin Centric, like so much that every second chapter will be in his pov, Assassination Attempt(s), Political Alliances, Self-Esteem Issues, Letters, Podfic & Podficced Works, Podfic, Podfic Length: 10-20 Minutes, but will get longer as I add more chapters, Audio Format: MP3, My First Podfic read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/3XJ7rMR

[thetrenderchronicles]

Broken Wings and Shattered Screams

WING AU: Brian Thomas Centric

Trigger/Content Warnings: angst, mentions of suicidal thoughts, semi-graphic torture, bodily mutilation, dead dove: do not eat, DONT READ IF YOU CANT HANDLE

Word Count: 2094 words

Tags: @shreeader @charl13x​ (if you wanna be added, let me know)

It was supposed to be a normal recon mission. Brian had done this for years. He'd sneak around, making sure no one got too close to flock territory and kill those who did. That or lead hunters away and then kill them. Either way, Brian was one of the best of the best scouts and killers of the group. He knew how to travel mostly undetected and he could kill someone in complete silence.

Normally, flock rules were to always have someone with you. A buddy system, if you will. Hoody tended to work better alone or only work with Masky. As Brian would work with Tim. However, Tim was busy with his family and helping the flock adjust to their new home thanks to hunters infiltrating their last home. Both Brian and Hoody wanted revenge.

Thankfully, Alex stood up and convinced Tim to let Brian go alone, saying he had survived seven years alone. Brian could handle a simple recon mission. Tim had a bad feeling in his gut, but he let Brian go anyway. Only, Brian never came back.

Hoody followed a group of hunters, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. His wings lightly bristled in the wind, gently brushing some leaves. A smile crept onto his face and he pounced. An animalistic screech rang out followed by the sound of flesh being ripped apart before it all went silent.

“Tim!” Jay called, anxiously, blue and gray wings fluttering nervously. He, Alex, and Tim were on a mission to find Brian. He should have returned by then. “I found something!”

Tim ran over, footsteps thumping along the ground. “It had better be good,” he growled, protective instincts flaring. There was a reason he was known as Papa Birb Tim. “What the hell did you find?”

“Umm, Tim, calm down,” Jay nervously said, moving his wing to the side to reveal blood, Brian’s torn hoodie, and a note. Tim’s wings flared out with silent rage. “Don’t you dare tell me to calm down, Jay!” Tim bellowed. Jay shrank back.

“Tim, Brian’s most likely still alive,” Alex snapped, black wings tightly folded behind his back. “Don’t shoot the messenger. Jay just found this. If anything, be mad at me. I convinced you to let Brian go alone.” He squatted down and looked over the note, facial expressions grim. “Fuck.”

Brian screamed, pulling against the chains that secured his arms above his head. His wings violently flapped, slamming against the wall behind him, adding to the pain in his back. He snarled and snapped at anyone who got close to him, teeth clicking as they snapped together. He squirmed and tugged at the chains, metal digging into the flesh of his wrists.

“Well, well, well,” Doctor Harrison drawled, walking toward Brian, looking from the man to his clipboard. “Brian Thomas,” he clicked his pen. “You’ve been quite the thorn in my side. But don’t worry. This could all be over soon. Did you leave the note, my dear?”

“Yes, I did, Doctor,” Nurse Chaplan nodded with a gleeful smile. She waved to Brian. “Miss me?” Brian growled and spat at her. She narrowed her eyes.

“Now now,” Harrison spoke, interrupting the hostility. He glared at his nurse and ordered her to go check on some tests. As she left, he turned and harshly grabbed Brian’s chin, forcing him to look the doctor in the eyes. “Here’s the deal, Brian,” he cooed, eyes flashing dangerously. “You can get out of here safe and sound if your friends get here in time. If not,” he glanced back at his surgical equipment. “If not, then we are going to have a lot of fun.”

Brian’s eyes were blown wide and his wings subconsciously shuddered in fear. He forced himself to keep calm and not hyperventilate. Harrison let go of him and stepped back, jotting down notes onto his clipboard.

They had to come for him. They had to. Brian looked at the clock across the room, the hands and the ticking seemed to haunt him. With each passing minute, Brian lost a little hope. Twenty minutes to six o’clock. His arms hurt from being held above his head for so long. The operating room was cold. Too cold for Brian.

His mind wandered back to the past. He remembered Tim always acting annoyed when he’d go to bed alone and wake up with everyone in his nest. He remembered Jay being in his bird form, sitting on Jessica’s shoulders whenever she would go into town for food and supplies. Alex would always help where he was needed, part of him still working on forgiving himself for falling victim to the Operator. Everyone had long forgiven him, but Alex still had to forgive himself. Brian didn’t know he had started crying until he heard the teardrops hit the floor.

Ten minutes left. Tim pushed himself to fly faster. He traveled through intervals of running and flying. Jay and Alex struggled to keep up with him. Tim had to get Brian before he was killed. Brian was Tim’s first and only true friend. Tim remembered how they first met. Both bumped into each other when their two highschools had their graduation parties at the same complex. They ended up ditching the party to hang out at Applebee’s. Then, it all just happened.

Rain clouds gathered in the sky, light droplets falling to the earth. Soft thunder rolled in the distance and the pitter patter of the droplets hitting the leaves and puddles almost helped to calm the trio's nerves. Almost. Less than five minutes. Alex narrowed his eyes and pushed his tired, sore limbs harder.

—

Brian's entire body flinched as Doctor Harrison and Nurse Chaplan returned, both gleefully eyeing the surgical equipment. A pit of anguish and betrayal grew in Brian's stomach. They…they didn't come. Tears brimmed Brian's baby blue eyes.

"It's okay to cry," Harrison faked sympathy. "This is going to be very, very painful." He picked up a saw and handed Nurse Chaplan a pair of large tweezers. "Oh, such a shame your friends didn't come. I guess you're not as important as you think you are."

"Shut up!" Brian screamed, eyes blazing with fury. Those were the first words he had spoken since he got there. Hoody tried to take control back from Brian, but Brian's fear and stubbornness wouldn't let him. "SHUT UP!"

"Ooh, touchy subject," Chaplan giggled. "It was only a matter of time before your usefulness ran out and they'd leave you alone."

Brian shook his head. "No, no, no, you're wrong!" He snapped, lunging forward, chains clanging as they held Brian back. He clenched his fists and pulled with all of his strength. He hissed in pain as the irritated flesh burned as the metal dug deeper.

"Keep screaming," Harrison chuckled, shaking his head. "No one will hear you. Are you ready for our fun to begin?"

"I won't tell you anything," Brian hissed, glaring daggers at the two. Despite being abandoned, Brian was still loyal. He wouldn't destroy his friends because he's suffering. "Do your worst!" he spat.

"Oh," Chaplan cupped Brian's face with her hand, tweezers in her other hand. "We plan to." Brian went to bite her and, quick as flash, she snatched her hand back. She pushed a button on the wall and the chains lowered Brian's hands enough for her to reach them without being uncomfortable.

Brian screeched and tried to keep his hands away from her. Her nails dug into his palms and his talons came out. "No, no, please!" Brian whimpered, realization dawning. "Don't do this…AHHH!" He wailed as she yanked a talon out. Blood spurt onto her face and arms, but she didn't care. Brian's body jerked and tensed, throat raw from dehydration and pained screams. Blood dropped down to the tiled floor. Brian's knees gave out and he hung from his arms, tears streaming down his face.

"Hmm, I figured you'd have more of a pain tolerance," Chaplan hummed, cleaning the tweezers before going to the next hand. Brian weakly struggled and sobbed. "Oh, don't do that. I promise to be gentle." A sickening snap rang out as the next five talons were ripped out.

Black spots danced across Brian's vision. His hands burned and stung. Blood covered his hands and floor beneath him. His fingers were now shorter. The fight had left his body. He tried to fight as he was manhandled into a lying position. His boots and socks were forced off. "Please, stop," he whispered, throat shredded from screaming. He banged his head back against the cement. His mind flashed back to the fall and he struggled again. Pain spread through his wings that were pinned beneath him.

"Ten more to go, Brian," Chaplan cooed. "You're doing so well." She started the process again.

"Go to hell," Brian spat blood to the side. He cried out as Harrison harshly kicked his side. "Don't be rude, Brian. This is to better you." He laughed as Brian screamed. Ten more snaps rang out over the span of a few minutes. Chaplan's face, hands and arms were drenched with blood.

Brian's eyes rolled to the back of his head, the pain too much to bear. Yet, he wasn't granted the sweet release of unconsciousness. They forced him to stay awake. He barely registered being forced into standing position, feet in white hot agony. Only when his wings were pulled to full length did he perk up.

"No, no, no, not that!" Desperation filled his voice, eyes wide with pain and horror. "Please, no! I'll do anything! Anything!" He screeched. "Tim help please!" he sobbed, head drooping. "Alex, Jay, anyone, please! TIM!" He screamed and struggled, eyes bulging as air was forced from his hand. Harrison punched Brian's gut again.

"Quiet, this will soon be over, Brian." He took the surgical saw and stepped behind Brian. "Feel free to scream as loud as you can." He pressed the blade to the root of Brian's wing.

A bloodcurdling, anguished scream rang out. Brian's body went limp, all energy and fight gone. Blood splattered everywhere. Pain clouded his vision and mind. Brian begged for Tim to save him. He apologized and screamed, praying Tim would come save him. But, no one came. Two weights were lifted from his back.

"I thought you could have screamed louder," Harrison shrugged, dropping the two wings in front of Brian, forcing the man to look at what was taken from him. Brian sobbed, body sagging. "Shame." He gripped Brian's face. "Your mother did." Brian wailed, eyes full of hatred and agony.

"Chaplan, send the bill to Andrew. I'm sure he'd love to pay for this," Harrison manically grinned. "I'll tell your father you said thank you," he taunted before pushing Brian back. The chains let him go and Brian's head hit the floor, allowing him to finally go unconscious.

—

The rain washed away the blood that pooled under Brian's body. He couldn't move, body too spent to do anything but feel pain. Tears mixed with rain water slid down his cheeks. He peeled his eyes open and stared up at the clouds. The ground beneath his body was muddy and soft. Brian prayed for death. He wanted to die. Then the pain would go away. Then, Tim and the others wouldn't have to worry about him anymore.

He barely registered someone crying out and pulling his body into their lap. Brian made a soft noise of pain. The other hugged him tightly, whispering apologies. " 'im," Brian's words slurred together. " 'm sorry, 'm sorry. Tr'ed t' fight ba…back." Brian slipped back into unconsciousness.

Tim sobbed harder. He gently held Brian close and attempted to bring him back to the Flock. He blamed himself for being late. He, Alex, and Jay had gotten there at 6:04, but Brian was gone. Back at the Flock, Brian was treated by Amy and Sarah, both trying to keep their tears to a minimum. The whole night was a horrible nightmare.

Afterwards, Brian was placed in the middle of the cuddle pile. Tim held Brian. Surrounded by family and comfort, dull blue eyes opened, but it wasn't Brian who woke up. Hoody glared at the ceiling thinking of all the ways he could imagine to torture and kill Harrison, Chaplan, and Brian's father.

Brian Thomas died that day. Hoody failed to protect him. Now, Hoody wanted revenge. And revenge is what he will get. A cruel smile crept onto his face. Yes, Hoody would avenge Brian and every other Winged who suffered at Harrison's hand.

[thereareeyesinsidethetrees]

about the incest post: yeahhhh the og creator was a stancest shipper. they're long gone now, but. yeah. it was there. i didn't learn that until recently :/

god fucking dammit (not mad at you. dont shoot the messenger, yknow)

and by the sounds of it, it seems that bit might be hard-baked into the story

hmm…what if, and hear me out- what if we either subscribe to unearthlyfromage’s revised au or make our own versions of the original au (or both)

considering that either option gets you an evil stan au free of incest

(idk- thats what i think im going to do personally. i only had a base understanding of the story anyway. that being ‘stan goes into the portal instead of ford and gets fucked up by bill. also he kills fords and his original dimension may or may not have been destroyed at some point’)

[gale-gentlepenguin]

ML What If: What if LukaDIDN’T lie to Ladybug in Wishmaker?

(What if Luka was honest with Ladybug in Wishmaker?)

-After defeating wishmaker, Ladybug asked Viperion if he Chat noir and her identities were safe.

-Viperion answered that they were safe.

-Ladybug then followed up.

-"Does that include you?"

-Now Luka felt his body screaming at him, he knew now why Marinette was so stressed, why she was always in such a rush. Knowing this, he understands her better. He could help give her peace of mind by telling a little white lie.

-But then, in his mind. "But would that be the right thing for her?"

-Viperion lowered his head.

-"I know yours and Chat noir's identities."

-Ladybug's eyes went wide.

-"Im sorry Ladybug, but I couldnt stop myself either time from learning. I know this means I cant be Viperion. I made this harder on you. But you needed to know."

-Ladybug took a moment. She let out a sigh.

-"Thank you, for being honest with me."

-Viperion looked at her, she smiled a bit.

-"I wont be able to call you as frequently to be a hero. But maybe this was a blessing in disguise."

-"Really?" Luka's eyes lit up.

-"You can watch out for Chat noir and for me. If I need to get into contact with him, You can reach out. You will need to tell him of course."

-Luka realized he had basically became Ladybug/marinette's messenger to Adrien.

-I will let him know.

-The events of wishmaker went about as expected. But there was a knowing smile between him and Marinette. In a way, he had more of a connection to her then he did before.

_____________________________________________________________

-Luka managed to arrange a meeting with Adrien, telling him he knew he was Chat noir. Explaining the whole situation.

-"So, you know both our identities?"

-"Yes. So I wont be Viperion unless something super bad happens."

-Adrien took a skeptical stance.

-"So are you her official partner now?"

-"No. I am more like your messenger, in case one of you needs to get something to the other. For emergencies"

-Adrien's negativity shifted.

-"Thats not so bad."

-"And if you ever need someone to talk to. I can lend an ear."

-Adrien thought about that and smiled. Luka was his friend. And sure he would have loved for Ladybug to have been the one to know his identity. But if someone had to know, Luka wasnt bad.

-"If that's the case. Mind if I get your opinion on things?"

_____________________________________________________________

-Luka was sort of shocked to hear what Adrien had told him. Being someone that hated not knowing the truth, he completely understood how the blond felt. He thought that Ladybug and Chat noir had a pretty solid trust going on. But it seems that Chat noir feels... out of the loop.

-Marinette called Luka and asked if he told chat noir.

-"He knows I know. And I can contact him."

-"Thats good."

-"Marinette, can I ask how you feel about Chat noir?"

-Marinette was surprised by the question.

-"Did he put you up to this?"

-"No. But I am curious."

-"He is my trusted partner. I can always count on him, no matter what happens."

-Luka paused as he processed that.

-"I know he would say he would believe you if you told him that."

-"Thats good to hear."

-Luka wanted to say more. But was it his place to say it?

-"Can I tell you something, about chat noir?"

-"Luka, I cant learn anything that would help me figure out his identity. I dont want to put us at risk"

-"I promise it isnt anything of the sort."

-"Okay, than you can tell me."

-"You both know a lot about the other, but you both don't know eachother."

-That was a rather odd statement. It didnt seem malicious, but it bothered her.

-"Luka what do you mean by that?"

-"Its just an observation. Have a good night Marinette."

-Marinette couldnt sleep, what did Luka mean by that?

[comfyswitcherblanketfort]

Company First- More If You’re Interested

dont look too closely here, you might see some shameless projection

CW: adult Ciri/Geralt eventually (they aren’t related and he didn’t raise her), no smut, flirting over text/sending almost nudes, sugar baby situation, ciri is pulling up her big girl panties and figuring her shit out and i wish i could say the same

________________

“Just call your grandma and tell her you need help,” Ciri’s roommate shrugged as she stuffed another taquito into her mouth. 

That was not an option. Ciri would just have to find a job on top of her student work program job that would work with her class and sports schedule. The ¾ ride for volleyball had sounded like everything would be taken care of but Ciri had severely underestimated just how expensive existing as a human being was. 

“Absolutely not. I’ll figure something out.” 

“Coul-” her roommate sputtered and gasped as she nearly choked on the taquito but got her act together well enough, “Could get a sugar daddy. You’re hot. Guys will pay you for pictures. And you wouldn’t even have to put out or show your tits.”

Ciri just stared at her for a moment, mouth a little ajar and eyebrows high on her forehead.

“Or you could do what my cousin did and strip your way through college. But she never quit bc she made more money at the club than with her degree…”

She thought about it for a moment, but Ciri snorted, “I sweat too much I’d slide right off the damn pole.”

The girls descended into giggles but the idea didn’t leave Ciri’s head. After a week and two more jobs saying they just didn’t have the hours she needed available, she picked the least shady-looking sugar baby site and made a profile. There were a few offers she said no to immediately. One guy gave her some major Bundy vibes and another was definitely trying to get her to launder money for him, but a couple seemed like they might work out. That is until one of them demanded nudes before he would agree to any terms or pay her at all. So it was down to one. 

WhiteWolf42. 34, 6’1, architect, looking for company first - more if you’re interested, have a dog (in case you’re allergic).

His profile wasn’t… awe-inspiring by any stretch of the imagination, but Ciri was getting desperate and the bit about company was reassuring. He also wanted to meet at a cafe she studied at often enough that the baristas knew her by name and order so that helped too. All that was left was appeasing her grandmother and meeting up with her godfather afterward and hopefully, she’d be set. 

She hadn’t seen Geralt since she was twelve, but he sent cards and Calanthe seemed to think highly enough of him. Ciri had even toyed with the idea of asking him for help if the potential sugar daddy fell through, but she reeeaalllyy hoped she didn’t have to do that. 

It was only as she ducked into the cafe that she realized she hadn’t exchanged pictures with Mr. WhiteWolf42 and had no idea who to sit with. She shot him a quick text while she ordered her coffee and got a nearly immediate reply.

“Back table on the left… back table on the left…” she muttered to herself, tapping her foot nervously as she waited for her drink. At least he’d chosen a table out of earshot of the baristas. She might get too shy otherwise. As she picked up her drink, she texted him back ‘omw, I’m the blonde with the blue backpack’.

She hadn’t even hit send when a message from him popped up, ‘don’t be alarmed by the white hair, i promise i didn’t lie about my age lol’. 

That was… odd, Ciri only knew of one other person who had hair like that… but the continent was big, she reasoned. It couldn’t be the same person. She rounded the corner to the left and was mid-draft of a response when she looked up at the back table and nearly dropped her phone.

“Geralt?”

He turned around and stared at her in mild horror and no small amount of embarrassment, “Ciri?”

They stared at each other for a moment before Ciri dropped into the seat in front of him and slapped her phone down on the table face up, “WhiteWolf42?”

Geralt flipped his phone screen up to show the same conversation, “You used a fake name.”

“I’m not stupid, Geralt. I may be desperate, but not enough to give some person I’ve never met my actual name.” she paused for a moment, feeling almost like a chastised child, “You didn’t give your name either. Or a picture.” 

He looked about to argue but snapped his mouth shut before swiping his phone off the table and giving her an apologetic look, “We can pretend this never happened if you want. I’ll buy you that air fryer for your dorm room and we can catch up and never tell anyone.”

Ciri couldn’t help but smirk, taking a sip of her coffee, “Are you trying to buy my silence?”

“No!” the look of alarm in Geralt’s eyes almost made her feel bad, “I just… I’ve known you since you were little. And I don’t want you thinking…”

“That I owe you something?” Ciri phrased it like a question, but she was pretty sure she knew what Geralt was saying. Only she didn’t much care for it. If he hadn’t known her parents they’d be talking allowances and her limits right now. She’d watched more than a few tiktoks and youtube videos on how to be a safe sugar baby, and she didn’t really feel like letting all that research go to waste. 

“I’d rather not. Forget about it, that is,” Ciri sat up a little straighter and flicked her braid over her shoulder, “If you think about it, this is best case scenario.”

One of Geralt’s eyebrows lifted and Ciri was quite violently reminded of the massive torch she had carried for him when she was younger, “Other than my head on a plaque in your grandmother’s living room?”

“No,” she giggled, fiddling with the sleeve on her coffee cup, “I already know you, I trust you, and what Calanthe doesn’t know can't hurt her.”

“Just like your mother…” Geralt chuckled, shaking his head and inspecting the lid of his coffee. 

“She was a bit of a slut too then?” That earned her a genuine laugh and Ciri couldn’t help the way her eyes roamed over Geralt’s neck and collar bones visible in the deep V of his tshirt. He was fucking gorgeous. She’d worried it might be a bit of a challenge to fake some attraction to whoever she ended up with, but Geralt made it easy. 

He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet, producing two crisp hundreds and slapping them on the table, “This is yours if you promise to tell me if something ever makes you uncomfortable. And I mean ever.”

Ciri smirked and rested her elbow on the table, holding her hand out to him, “Pinky swear.” 

They talked terms, cover lies for Calanthe if they needed to, even a playful little conversation about kinks that was absurdly hot, and by the time their coffees were gone they were catching up like old friends. It was nice to talk to someone who already knew her, someone who she didn’t have to explain things or prove herself to. As Geralt walked her to her next class just down the block she felt a little giddy. She wouldn’t have to drop out and Geralt kissed her cheek when he said goodbye. Her head practically spun all the way to room 406.

-

It had been a couple days since their date- meeting- catch up- whatever- and Ciri was getting nervous. She’d told her roommate right away, leaving out the bit about how she already knew Geralt, and every five minutes she would get pestered to see if he’d texted her yet. It got so annoying that Ciri finally got fed up and decided to text him herself just to get her roommate to shut the ever-loving fuck up. 

Only she had no idea what to say. All through her Stats class, Ciri drafted and redrafted messages but nothing sounded right. A simple ‘hi’ didn’t seem appropriate and she didn’t want to stick with the ‘whatchya up to?’ in case it sounded too casual, too much like the little girl she definitely no longer resembled. No, she needed something to set the tone. 

After her team weight lifting, she sat on a bench desperately trying to figure out what to say, staring at her phone like it might magically draft its own message. Out of nowhere, a hand shot up to swipe at the back of her phone, almost knocking it into her face and making her scramble to keep it from falling. 

“Is it a boy?” One of the upperclassmen chuckled, sitting down next to Ciri and handing her an ice pack before securing one to her own knee with an ace bandage. 

Ciri just rolled her eyes, “No.”

“A girl? Much more my speed, how can I help?” 

“Not a girl either…” Ciri locked her phone and hid it in the band of her spandex before hissing as she laid the ice over her ankle.

The upperclassman sighed like a tired old man, “I’m not going to make fun of you. You’re on my team. I want to get to know you. If it’s personal you don’t have to tell me, I just thought it might be a little bonding outside of drills.” 

Ciri finally looked up at her, thanking her coach mentally for making everyone wear name tags for the first couple of weeks. Amanda was one of the nice ones, hadn’t yelled at her when she told them her physical therapist didn’t want her doing specific ab workouts. Maybe she could bond a little bit…

“You can’t judge me….” she started, feeling the blush creep up up into her cheeks as Amanda’s eyebrows shot up, “...I- its… my sugar daddy….” 

“No fucking shit.” Amanda absolutely cackled with glee, “Kayla! The sweet one isn’t as innocent as you thought! Went and got hersel-” Ciri smacked Amanda in the boob, effectively shutting her up but Kayla was already on her way over. 

“Got you a what, kiddo?” 

“Tell her, Ciri.” Amanda giggled. 

That familiar pride fueled rage she recognized in her grandmother flared up and she squared her shoulders with a challenging look in her eyes, “A sugar daddy. Kind of…” 

Kayla dropped into her stretches right in front of them and made it clear she was there for storytime, “Kind of?” 

“Well, I don’t know what to say? Like I shouldn’t just ask how his day is right? But how the fuck do you flirt just out of the blue?” Ciri answered like it was a confession.

“Send him a nude!” Kayla suggested eyes lighting up like this was the best news she’d heard all day. From what Ciri had gathered, she lived for tea, so it probably was. 

“No, no no no no no no, you gotta get some money first,” Amanda waved her hand in the air as she spoke, “Maybe a spandex and bra pic. Flirty, enticing, but no tits without cash. Especially if your face is in it. And especially if he’s ugly. Don’t want to level up past pics for cash if you don’t have to.”

Ciri chuckled and pulled out her phone, “Oh he’s not ugly. Not at all.” She bit her lip to keep from grinning too wide while she showed off the couple of pictures of Geralt she’d snuck while they were at the coffee shop. The one where he was frowning ever so slightly at his phone before he’d realized some stray hairs had fallen in his face got a particularly fun reaction. 

“Shit, I’d send him a video and my address,” Amanda said with a whistle, “Man looks like a god.”

Smirking as she stood up, Ciri removed her ponytail and fluffed up her hair, now partially dry from all the sweat from practice, “Well I’m off to take some slutty pics for the god, I guess.”

Kayla cackled and called after her, “If it doesn’t work out can I have his number?”

Ciri just turned around and flipped her off with a scrunched nose smile, getting even more laughter as she slipped into the locker room. Luckily the back aisle of lockers had a mirror on the wall next to it with a counter people usually used for makeup or braiding their bangs back. She figured it would be a better background than her roommate’s mess in their dorm, so she shucked her shirt and shoved it out of frame before adjusting her boobs so it looked like there was almost cleavage. 

After several hundred photos taken and almost as many deleted, she decided against a filter and picked the one with one leg up on the counter and across her body where her ass looked biggest and her strappy sports bra was pretty much almost showing her areola. Seemed slutty enough. If she weren’t so scared of him getting a conscience and bailing, Ciri would have sent Geralt a clip of her getting out of the shower. But she needed this and to be quite honest, she wanted him. 

Taking a deep breath, she selected the picture and just typed what she would say if she knew for sure he was into her. Just, let the horny freak go for a bit. It’d been a while since she’d had time or energy to get herself off anyway, why not direct some of it at Geralt. 

Too bad I don’t have any lingerie to wear for you… can I call you Daddy? Or is that too soon?

The little checkmark that told her it was read showed up almost immediately and she bit at her lip as she waited for those little typing bubbles to pop up. She waited for at least five whole minutes and felt like she might actually cry before the bubbles finally popped up. 

Fuck, you can call me whatever you want, Princess. Long as you’re still okay with it…

Ciri rolled her eyes, feeling a sudden surge of both confidence and horniness from being called Princess. She peeled her bra off and arranged her hair so it just barely covered one of her nipples and covered the other with her palm as she groped herself. Without even looking to see if she liked it she sent it to him and immediately started typing. 

Did I stutter?

The little typing bubbles showed up immediately and Ciri could have moaned at the message he sent back. 

I’m gonna have to hide at my desk while this… problem goes down. Are you free tonight? We can get you some lingerie if you want, but that spandex did the trick.

The mental image of Geralt hiding his boner from the rest of the office was almost intoxicating. The power definitely was. Ciri decided it couldn’t hurt to send one more, arranging her hair to cover both breasts this time and hooking her thumb in her waistband so she could tug it down just enough to see her string bikini tan line. She sent it with a time to pick her up and giggled while she watched the little typing bubbled appear and disappear as Geralt tried to type out a response. Oh, this was going to be great fun. 

As she redressed, not bothering to put her cold damp bra back on, she got a picture of Geralt’s jeans and his hand palming a significant bulge that made her clench her thighs together with the text, I have to go to a meeting like this. See you tonight.

She walked out of the locker room with an extra pep in her step and Amanda caught up before she could sneak out the side door, “Wait! Do we get to see? Oh shiiiiit,” Amanda grinned and playfully elbowed her in the ribs as they walked, “Where’s your bra?”

Ciri just shrugged and ducked out of the building. She had to shower and get three hours of homework done in two before Geralt picked her up. It’s not like she planned on coming home that night. 

[russetruse]

I’m stepping out of my comfort zone and posting sketches since I’ve been art gone on here for a while since I haven’t been able to do any completing on my Art.  So here’s a new series I’ll call Russet’s Sketches! I am very proud of this sketch. @lizadale enjoy your bois. Prep Gigi and Hot Topic Dio. And Dio still can not deny being shorter then Gigi. Enjoy the spoils! 

[limelocked]

If you are willing to share, I would love it if you had any encanto fic recs?

okay so theres a few ive probably lost to time because heehoo forgot i was neither logged in nor that i cant track what fics ive put kudos on (at least as far as i know)

Sick with What We Owe Each Other by Capriciously_Terminal is a sickfic i didnt know was a sickfic until two chapters in, it does an amazing job with characterization honestly and has some Funky vibes later on that i love

Cuñado by MDJensen is a fic that (iirc) walker mentioned in a single tag and thats what it took for me to read it, i have nothing to defend myself i just like bruno and agustín being friends, sue me

The Mouse in the Walls by UC_Glue very obvious rec, i have some gripes with it but not enough to not recommending it, ratón our beloved <3

Growing Pains by Bending_Metal HONESTLY?! The Beloved. follows tiny triplets via brunos pov of how they grew up and their relationship with alma

Apiary by EtherealNyx need i say more than agustín loves his wife very much? fic about agustín falling in love with julieta

Glass Facade by rosewaterfish also tiny triplets growing up, i have a niche of fics i like and its seemingly bruno and tiny triplets exclusive. More graphic than growing pains and with more angst

Don't Shoot the Messenger by vedle bruno has a Time and someone might be getting murdered? im looking hard in its direction

where the dandylions play by Penstills now im not a huge papa bruno au reader, i was very hyped about the au when i first watched the movie but it died down mainly because i think the fics i first read in the au had bruno kinda out of character but in a slightly to the left way? anyways this is not that! single dad bruno was forced out of the encanto by now gone partner we dont speak about and its just very nice, bruno runs a magic shop :D

a house built on sand (rebuilt on solid stone) by Ford_Ye_Fiji bruno runs to shield mirabel when casita falls and is hurt, family reacts and bruno is struggling

Red Glass among the Green Emeralds by Fan_People_Anonymous only has one chapter and i read it today but im Very interested in what it has to offer in the future, mystery genre vibes rn

A Place to Hide by EvieNyx is the fist part of A Place Between the Walls which is a nice 3 fic series with 1 chapter each where mirabel and bruno try to function around telling abuela about a not great vision

Landscape With the Fall of Icarus by archive_rat bruno has a nightmare about drowning, the family takes it as a prophesy, the fic is very knowledgably about rivers and water which i think is very sexy

Future Deja vu by Daantjie_fanatics short and single chapter, very cute dinner scene

His Mirabel by PrincessLuca22 pure fucking fluff, fic of how antonio sees mirabel with all the wonder and reverence only a kid can have for a 15 y/o

Loose Cannons by breakfastdemon bruno has fucked up visions (not the content but how they work) and its a problem; the fic. also the second ever place ive seen the word palimpsest be used and the other was dimension 20. very funky fic

theres two others i liked that i dont think is either of these but i also cant remember the name of, im also currently reading The Door No One Knocks On and while not being a huge fan of the mirabel runs away genre i do like it so far

[princess--bongwater]

oooo you wanna talk abt our au . soo bad

SHAKING THE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE CLENCHING MY TEETH. I'll copy paste from disc hold on

So the main summary is . Messenger dies in the final fight against de protecting vc and she never gets over the denial phase and spirals deeper and deeper into insanity while learning dark magics trying to bring them back and it deteriorates her mental health so much she finally kills herself either from the magic getting to her head or the grief. We came up with this last night

We've never been more normal

[zombvibes]

Thoughts on Berdly/Noelle? AUs included

Like…the ship? Uhhhh :

Shipping Noelle with a guy is a crime against humanity /j

Shipping Berdly with a girl is also a crime against humanity but that’s because Berdly is canonically bitchless (no women want him) /j

Noerdly wins the “most nonsense deltarune ship name ever” contest (im sorry it’s true dont shoot the messenger)

…Why? Just why? I’m not even upset. Is it for the shits? For the giggles?? If so, I respect it. But at the same time, there has to be a line SOMEWHERE /lh

As a platonic ship however, YES. 2ND FUNNIEST DUO IN THIS GAME. 10 10/10s

FORGOT TO INCLUDE AUS UHHH (I assume you mean MY aus and not like ALL deltarune aus…)

For teammateswap uh…considering glasses noelle constantly insults emo berdly um. I don’t think that’s gonna work out too well.

For allyswap noelle and berdly are pretty much connected at the hip and never leave each others side so I guess that could work but…no. No. No thanks. Nooooo. Nooooooo. no. nah. They’re just besties who cuddle sometimes.

[tortilla-of-courage]

Describing it as being like home is actually pretty accurate yeah.

And YES! I am totally willing to talk about my modern AU.

I've been calling it the Adoption AU because Time ends up adopting all of the boys. It mostly started as, I saw an edit for a tweet someone did with Wars and Wild that involved Taco Bell (cannot remember the blog or post for the life of me though), and so I wrote a thing about Warriors sneaking out of his university dorm to pick up Wild, who snuck out the window despite his broken arm, and then got extorted by Legend in exchange for silence at 3am.

This was followed by a fic where Groose decided spray painting a public building was a good idea and got himself and Sky arrested, set earlier in the timeline.

So then I made a timeline. Twilight is Time and Malon's biological son, and he found Wild on the side of the road one day (Wild's backstory involves a bad car wreck and an underground hospital, but no conspiracy bullshit. Yet). Wild has no memory, so they keep him. Wild brings home Legend, who was told his uncle died at school before a holiday. They then also keep Legend. Malon finds Four in her barn one morning for complicated reasons, and they keep him too. Twilight finds Warriors, who is in his class, hiding in an alley one day after he ran away from an abusive home and brings him home too. SS Impa (who I've nicknamed Shield because there are enough prominent Impas here that they should get nicknames too) is a social worker who's trying to find Sky a home and has run out of options, and turns to Time, who has a record of successfully housing 'unhousable' youths, and asks if he can take one more. He can. Wild finds Hyrule and brings him home because 'Rule needs a shower even more than Wild does. Hyrule stays. Wind's grandma ends up with Wind and his sister but can't financially take care of both and so Wind ends up with the boys and everyone is +1 Grandma.

Twilight has a fic detailing how he knows Midna and Dusk and I ended up shooting him (oops) but at least their social project gets handed in on time.

Then I started hashing out Time's backstory and suddenly this AU had plot. And organized crime. And a conspiracy. And secret societies.

The summarized version is that the gems from OoT are like, Idk what they do yet. Haven't gotten to a point where I need to figure that out yet. But they are Important and have to be carefully guarded. The Great Deku Tree (just called Deku because he's not a tree here) was Time's foster father before Ganondorf killed him. Also, Ganondorf is Deku's half brother. Because. However Time 'stole' the Emerald and he and Navi ran until OoT Impa (Sage) and Lullaby found them. So Time got adopted into Lullaby's family. Ruto inherited the Sapphire from her mother who also died from mysterious circumstances, and Darunia has the Ruby. Lullaby got the Ocarina from her late paternal grandmother.

Then Ganon finds them and tries to steal the Emerald from Time, so Lullaby goes looking for help and thus finds the sages. Saria is an anonymous hacker who uses the screen name 'Kokiri'. Time reveals he didn't steal the Emerald, he was Deku's heir, and then Navi goes missing. Time is home worried enough that he's physically sick, and Ganon decides to try and attack the home. Only Lullaby's family is Olde Money, and they live in a big, old manor, so Lullaby as Sheik decides to play 'Home Alone' with the secret passages in the walls and they piss off Ganon because when did that brat get a sheikah bodyguard??? Sage and Rottla (Lullaby's mother, who is fully sheikah as well) rush home from a thing and Kokiri is running a play by play watching the security cameras.

I pull in my headcanon that Time was killed in the Downfall Timeline by getting impaled on Ganon's tusk and Ganondorf stabs him with the tusk of a mounted boar head and then Sheik shows up to protect his brother, and then Mama gets home and is not happy to find this man in her home attacking her kids. Time is fine, but Navi stays missing. (She's alive tho.)

Also, Time's foster dad was the last leader of a secret society known as The Order of The Lost Woods, and Time learns this upon meeting Tatl, who gets him sucked into another event that would probably make a good action movie. I have thought too much about the Order and it's hierarchy, but what's important here is that Time ends up with a standing job offer and Tatl and he remain friends and we find out how I fit FD into this AU. It's not pretty. This is where Time loses his eye too.

The AoC came out and I added that Link in as Wild's twin brother and he shows up during the main plot.

Which starts with Twi getting kidnapped. (I'm not really meaner to him than the others, I swear, he's just the most logical choice to be Time's heir. Which he is. He doesn't know this though.)

So he's kidnapped by Ganondorf, who broke out of jail, Zant, who shot Twi in highschool, and Ghirahim, who has some history with Sky I haven't fleshed out yet and a very public rivalry with Warriors over twitter. About six weeks later Sage finds him in an abandoned warehouse (because of course) with a shackle on his left arm and a lot of new injuries. He ends up fine, but he tells Time later in the hospital what happened and he's both message and messenger and Time is this close to just committing murder. Tatl talks him down.

Somewhere here is the half finished fic where I introduce AoC Link as Luke/Knight, and this is as far as I've plotted thus far.

Other tidbits: Wild and Lullaby/Sheik are both genderfluid, Lullaby/Sheik married Ruto, Wild has a very popular YouTube channel, Twi does drag racing sometimes, Sky has a pet bird, Four has DID to explain how the Colours are here too, and Wolfie exists in the form of a random wolf-dog Wild found and brought home that Legend somehow convinced half the family was Twilight. Also, Warriors has somehow befriended an entire sorority and he doesn't know how this happened.

This... got long. As you can see I have a lot of thoughts about the Adoption AU. It's gotten a bit away from me, I'll admit. This went from 'Wild does stunts on his motorbike and keeps breaking bones but somehow not the bike' to 'Twilight got kidnapped and Time is the target of a mafia that Ganon runs and also maybe killed a man once' and I don't know how that happened. Also, this is the condensed version of the summary. My actual summary/outline is much, much longer than this. So if there's any detail you want more on, feel free to say so and I'll happily go into more detail (there are so many things I didn't even mention....)

And yes, Robbie having a bong is very important to my best friend, for some reason. He has one in a modern AU and he probably invented one in canon. I happen to agree that this makes sense for his character, if anyone would invent a bong in LoZ it's Robbie (this is such an anticlimactic end to this ask after the stuff about the modern AU...)

Also, sorry for the long ass ask. I genuinely don't know how to condense the Adoption Au down any further. There's a lot of important plot beats to cover, and I still skipped things.

-Attllhak

oh my GOD???? if you ever write and post this somewhere id love to read it, the level of "crazy" conspiracy/action movie elements implemented sound sosososo cool, from Ganondorf being Deku's half brother to trying to "send a message" via Twi and- just- all of this is SO good.i sat here and reread this ask like 3 times as if that would magically spawn more info about it ahaha

there's so much to unpack here but it's honestly so worth it i love every single detail!!! i can imagine the actual outline being way longer, nad honestly that just makes me the more excited/curious about all that might be missing from this ask - i cant believe it started with Wild and Wars going to Taco Bell of all things

also i can totally see Robbie making a bong, no matter the setting or AU. fits him a lot I'd say

and dont worry about long asks!! i adore opening up my askbox to see one ask take over the entire thing, it makes me really happy aha

[vegalocity]

The Interrim-Red Groom AU

So i’m diving backward into the ‘Dont worry about it’ pool after that finale

SO DON’T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT YOU GUYS WHO’S UP FOR MORE PRINCESS BRIDE AU?

I had to make an entire scene up because for the Story to keep going Princess Bride Style Red Son needed to get fucked over one more time

--

Soon enough three days time had passed and Red Son was ready to make his escape. Due to the nature of his ruse against the prince he hadn't made any arrangements to set up a forge or workshop for his passions, so he didn't have much by way of equipment to make his escape, and every day the prince asked to join him for at least one meal, wherein he would 'politely' ask over Xiaotian, claiming to want to know a little about the man whom had stolen his groom right out from under him.

He said these things in jest and laughter, but Red Son was no fool and could easily see the flint behind his eyes, ready and willing to twist any information Red Son gave about Xiaotian against him, to try and convince him that his beloved wouldn't take him back. Willing to take whatever details he gave him and put them in some falsified letter of rejection in attempt to make him believe his love wanted him no more, so he wouldn't put up a fight any longer.

So he lied. He spoke of not the Inn that he'd met Xiaotian in, but implied he'd always been the lord of his mountain. How they hadn't been able to be engaged due to his parents having a letter of neutrality between his family and Xiaotian's own, and how he'd had to go on a perilous journey to nullify that arrangement, but they'd believed him dead. He told him Xiaotian favored poetry, and was in fact a gifted shapeshifter, preferring a more human appearance like himself as it made travel far easier when people underestimated you.

The prince had soon grown bored of his prattling, and Red Son found it almost ironic that for once he was not speaking of tinkering and his projects when his conversational partner stopped listening. After those meals scarce as they were, the prince ended up straightening his back primly and claimed he had a meeting of some sort with his macaque general, and left him to his devices.

So now here he was, ready to make his escape.

It took actually took the longest time to try and pare down an outfit from this place so that it would be inconspicuous enough to use for travel, but he'd managed, sneaking some nonperishable food and a spare dagger into his pack for preparation and extra protection had been easy. He just made it seem to the servants that he was still anticipating the response to a letter that was never sent, and eagerly awaiting for a letter that would not exist that stated his return to Xiaotian's mountain was expected, and thus was slowly yet steadily prepping for the journey. The pitying glances he could sense the servants shooting him definitely told that they were aware of the fact that he was being 'tricked'.

But Red Son paid them no mind, after all, he knew the prince was full of lies, and he was going to be gone before the night's end anyway.

But then Red Son was summoned for his usual meal with the prince, and he willed his nerves to freeze over. He couldn't let his plans slip, while he'd long since regained his strength form his injuries in the forest he was only one demon and there was a mountain of servants and guards that would be standing between him and making a break for it if he didn't have stealth on his side.

“Beloved.” The prince greeted him as he entered. “My messengers have returned from their trip.” In three days time? How oblivious did he take him for?

Nonetheless he perked up, did his best to look eager and excited. He was never quite sure if he looked convincing, but he just needed to pretend for a few more hours.

The letter was brought right over to him, and he quickly undid the seal to reveal a message that in no way was written by his love. Though they did a good job at pretending, claiming it was written by 'his mother'—Xiaotian had never spoken of his biological parents, and his adoptive ones were both men, but in his prattling Red Son had invented a mother for his fake backstory—and that she was writing in 'her Son's stead as he was too upset and angry to be able to make a readable response. Going on to say that Xiaotian had returned to 'their mountain' in tears and had sworn that this was one too many cruelties Red Son had delivered him, and that he never wanted to speak to someone so two faced he convinced him twice of their supposed love only to twice have his heart ground into the dirt by him ever again.

It was well phrased, he'd give the prince that. It even stung a little when the supposed 'mother' had regaled that 'Xiaotian' had bitterly given 'his blessing' to his impending marriage. The thought of his love, bitter and betrayed, felt so wrong his heart hurt just at the idea.

But he couldn't let himself linger on that lest he lose his courage.

“This cannot be...” he breathed, hoping beyond all hope his knowledge of the deception read as simply denial.

“Is there something wrong?” The Prince asked around his cup. “Surely your beloved made it home safely.”

“This cannot be...” he didn't know what else to say without possibly giving himself away, so he could only hope that it sounded like shock.

“Beloved?”

He stood, he had to get out of the prince's sight before he failed to properly mask his knowledge.

“This is a lie! She... She never approved of us!” Red Son hoped at least that gave his reaction plausible deniability.

“Didn't you recently just regale to me that Xiaotian's mother loved you as a suitor for her son?” He cursed internally, but before he could scramble to cover the lie the prince continued. “Beloved, I know it must be hard to hear, but we had an agreement. Xiaotian wants no more to repair what he believed you threw away, his mother;s missive reveals as much. You gave me your word that no matter his desire you would respect his choices. Don't be selfish, love.” Red Son would be lying yet more if he claimed that that didn't sting a little.

But he'd get to that bridge when he got to it, so he turned on his heel and stormed from the room. The servants gave him a wide berth as he marched towards his rooms, face fierce but mind preoccupied with escape plans.

So preoccupied in fact he didn't notice a particular shadow following behind him.

Upon reaching his quarters he made sure to scare off any staff that would rat him out and began to scream, his fire coursing and bursting out from his body in waves, scorching the furniture around him and leaving piles of soot to build up atop his shoes. Soon enough the room had enough damage for word of his fury to have been carried to the prince, and the servants far too afraid to make their way in for quite some time. He'd have about an hour of being given a very wide berth before someone came in to check up on him.

Red Son darted for his bed and hidden among the luxurious blankets was his makeshift bag, he double checked the contents inside and nodded to himself when he came to the conclusion that everything was in order. Then he approached the writing desk and reached beneath it. Feeling around for a moment he grinned slightly to himself as he pulled out the small bottle. He'd always gotten praises in potion making, but this wasn't a potion that would make his tutors proud. He didn't NEED any magical properties in it, he just needed it to be flammable.

Which it was.

Just as he went over his plan one more time the shadows in the room seemed to flicker, and Red Son felt strikingly cold despite the amount of fire he'd just unleashed.

“I told him you were more clever than he was expecting out of you.” The voice startling him and nearly causing Red Son to drop the potion in his hands, he scrambled with the glass bottle and turned to the source of the noise.

The Six eared macaque had appeared in his room, how had he gotten in there without him noticing?

“Oh... I uhm...” He didn't have a lie prepared, Red Son's mind raced to try and come up with a plausible excuse but improvisation was never his strong suit, he would so quickly grow flustered and frustrated and usually do himself in so how could he be expected to lie convincingly on first bout?

“Don't waste a perfectly good lie trying to cover up what we both already know.” The macaque stated, a sort of boredom in his voice that made Red Son stiffen. “You know the letter was false, you know what the prince has planned for you.” The macaque took a step forward and Red Son prepared to fight him, but remembered after a beat the fire resistance charm he'd had on his person scant few days ago. He likely had it on him right now.

“I love it, he can't stand it, but I love it... Of course that also means his plans are a complete waste of your talents as far as I'm concerned.  If he hadn't planned that whole 'spider queen and her ilk' situation Your lover wouldn't have found out until it was too late, and we probably could have convinced you to go to war if he'd just been a bit more patient.”

“You're talking an awful lot for someone who supposedly is on his side.”

“I'm on MY side, highness.” The macaque said easily. “The Prince is no one to sneeze at, but then again, neither are you. Tell me, should I endorse this little sneak about and help you escape? What would benefit me from not telling the prince about your little explosive and your plans?”

He racked his brain for a moment. “I can tell my parents of your assistance in enabling my escape, they'd no doubt give you the same power you have here, accompanied by my family's resources you'd find yourself with more force behind yourself than you'd know what to do with. Or if I told Xiaotian he could do the same at his own mountain, he's not exactly a nobody either-”

That second part was a mistake, by how the macaque's expression darkened. “Yes I know He's the 'New Monkey King'. Sun Wukong's Body double.” He stated simply. But before Red Son could take it back or just ensure alliance with his own family, he found his arms being restrained. A pair of clones made of shadow clung to his sides and while they dispersed quickly under his fire  it was only for a moment.

Then there was a golden glow, and his arms all at once felt very heavy indeed as a cold pair of cuffs—the second set of wrist cuffs that the macaque had shown him- how had he forgotten about those?—activated and forced his wrists together. The magic quickly worked its way through his system again and he felt a cold shudder wrack up his spine.

“Your 'beloved' was quite loose lipped once I got him going on the machine. Don't hold it against him, highness, I haven't met a single man that could hold up against that level of pain.”

for a moment the words didn't process in his head, abut when they did any other thought flew right from his head.

There was only rage.

It was pathetic really, how quickly he'd been apprehended, how his fire had only a moment outside his body before once again being turned back round onto him, and his body—now remembering the pain he could do onto himself—forced his magic to cease. There was no instinctual blaze to shatter the cuffs this time, because he realized as more of the macaque's shadow clones pinned him down, that he didn't believe him.

There was no way that Xiaotian had been this monster's plaything. He had learned whatever it was he'd implied he'd learned through other methods, maybe as simple as recognizing Flower Fruit Mountain and Xiaotian had to explain the situation to him.

But If it was just his own escape the macaque was stopping then wouldn't he have not wasted the time in toying with him like that? Wouldn't he have just told the prince and been done with it? Put the cuffs on him without the monologue? Why would he waste his time in trying to trick Red son into believing him possible to sway?

Unless-

Unless he'd heard about Xiaotian planning on coming back for him himself

He almost wanted to laugh even as the clones forced him back to his feet and the Macaque crushed his liquid fireball in his hand. He was unsure if anything could make him as fearful or angry or whatever feeling it had been to make him break his restraints again as they did back in the forest, but it explained his knowledge of Xiaotian's identity, as well as his anger, and his attempt to trick Red Son. To test to see how far Red Son was willing to go to to defy the prince and follow his own heart.

But that didn't matter.

Xiaotian was coming for him.

It was a bitter medicine to take, to have to once again rely on his love to save him, rendered with naught but his intelligence on his side and left close to defenseless with these stupid cuffs back around his wrists, but He'd make it up to him.

For everything Xiaotian had done for him and how thoroughly Red Son had proved himself unworthy of such devotion, Red Son swore then to himself, that once this was all over, once he and Xiaotian were safe he'd make it all up to him. For every moment for the rest of their shared lives together.

Because when he saw him again he was never letting go.

–

“Captain I've heard rumors that the Monkey King is planning on killing my groom.’”

“My prince I've heard no such rumors-”

“Are you implying my spymaster lies to me?”

“Of- of course not my prince! What must be done to protect your groom before the wedding?”

“I'm currently having my beloved moved to a safer, more secure room in the palace to ensure no harm shall befall him before the wedding date, and we're moving the wedding itself up a few days. Go to the village and nearby forest, and the closest town, and round up all with former criminal histories. I want every possible hired gun behind bars by the time of my wedding in three days time.”

“Three days time your highness? Such a feat would require more men than we have at our disposal at the moment-”

“Then form a brute squad! You have my clearance! I want my prince safe from all harm! If He dies, then we'll have no choice but to go to war and we lack the men for such an insurgence against the Monkey King! I would have to go to his parents begging for assistance and that is not a bar I am willing to lower myself to!”

“Yes your highness!”

“Go! Waste no time!”

“Of course!”

–

Xiaojiao stared into the bottom of the jug of wine. Drained, just like all the others.

Her head was pleasantly fuzzy and the wine in her blood buzzed comfortably. It was a familiar state, she wasn't dependent on intoxication, but when she was at her lowest she would often find solace in the buzzed pleasantness of a good bender. Because here she was again.

No work, no leads, no friends.

Spider Queen had told her if they got separated that she should go back to where 'it started' i.e. The inn they'd gotten the job at. So she'd rented a room, and spent the next few days waiting, and when it became clear neither the Spider Queen, nor even Sandy were turning up, when Xiaojiao was made aware that she was well and truly alone, she blew most of her money on as much wine as she could get her hands on and began to chug.

She felt much like the scared twelve year old she once was, clinging to the handle of the Jade Sword and telling herself it didn't matter how terrified she was, as she HAD to fight. Her scar twinged at the memory.

At least no one would sell wine to a twelve year old. She didn't USED to be this pathetic when she was lonely and sad and on the verge of despair.  She used to have other avenues to vent it all when it became too much.

Someone could storm right in right now with news on finding the Six Eared Macaque and Xiaojiao couldn't even be sure if she'd believe them for how despondent she felt.

“Long Xiaojiao?” A voice broke her reverie. Xiaojiao blinked blearily up at the tough looking fellow before her.

“Who wants to know?” she slurred.

“You've been arrested twice for assault and once for theft, as a security precaution all with criminal records are behind detained for the next three days by order of the prince.”

She scoffed. “I'd like to see you try, buddy.” Her fingers felt heavy but she lifted the sword easily.

Her form was off, her limbs felt loose and limp, but she still held her own against the brute's clumsy axe swings. It would be pathetic to lose to this chump.

But before the fight could be solved one way or another, a pair of blue hands wrapped around the brute's torso and lifted him into the air.

And Xiaojiao was met with a very familiar (if blurry through her impaired vision) red bearded smile.

“Sandy!”

“Xiaojiao! So nice to see you again!” Sandy set the brute down but kept hold of his torso. “This is the friend I told you about captain, she's far more dangerous alone than she is with me. I'll keep her out of trouble, I can promise you that!”

She loved watching Sandy loom. The aura around him making anyone who didn't know him reel back as every alarm in their brains fired off danger signs. His pleasant grin and tone didn't change but to the people around them that was more frightening than before.

“Just mark her name right off there and I can handle the rest!” Sandy chirped and the shaking brute did just that, stiffly turning and marching out of the inn.

“Sandy you old bastard.” She cooed delightedly as Sandy shifted his focus back onto her and she felt the cool blue hands wrap around her own torso before she was pulled into a hug.

“You smell like wine, Are you okay, Xiaojiao you don't drink unless...-” Sandy shot her a far too knowing look.

“I've been better buddy, I'll admit.”

“Well, If it helps I've heard a lot of rumors and seen a lot of things as part of this little 'brute squad' some things that might interest you.”

“Hm?” She leaned into Sandy's embrace, her friend really gave the absolute best hugs.

“I think I found the Six Eared Macaque.”

Xiaojiao wasn't sure if it was disbelief, shock, sudden crashing cresting hope, or just the wine, but she suddenly got very dizzy.

And then everything went black.

[perhapsthanatos]

03:13 am with renjun ♡

nct's renjun x gn!reader (inspired by his recent photoshoot)

alternate title: death is an early bird

genre: angst. fluff. non idol au. angel of death!au.

word count: 670~

playlist: how to fight by eartheater, so humble the afternoon by julia holter & for those who patiently endure by lauren auder.

warnings: violence & death. lowercase intended. not proofread.

a/n: i know i just published that johnny fic this morning, but i have zero self control & wanted to get this out there even if its literally 2 am :D originally, this fic was supposed to be a witch!au but i didnt know where to go with it so i headed another direction AHAHAH this fic was inspired by a video of someone rewriting the last season of game of thrones & redoing the long night episode wayyy better this time (YES IM STILL MAD & YES IM STILL SALTY THAT THE SHOW WAS RUINED) but i dont remember which one though bc ive watched too many, but if i do come across it again, i will add the link! also happy bday renjun bb <3

the night is cold, but it has only begun. you try your very best to focus on the battle ahead of you, attempting to aim your arrows at the opponent’s men from the top of the dark castle. you only have one goal, and one job. you have bent the knee to the queen and now you fight for her and for your home. but that is all quite a challenge when your only guide is the the first quarter moonlight and the occasional hot bursts of flames, as well as the sounds of screams ripping through from below. you take the tip of the arrow to the flame of the torch that you've kept by your side. taking a sharp breath, you strategically shoot it through the fog and watch as it directly pierces the heart of a soldier who then bursts into flames in one fell swoop. you and your running mind only get more numb by the second. yes, you are alive, but you are devoid. you’ve seen far too much innocence get destroyed in a matter of seconds, fragile souls getting wounded or even end up dying in pain. but death does not have much care or time to dwell on that.

there is no time to think about that now, though. this has begun to be a survival for the fittest now. you know the night will remain to be a long one, for only the victors will bring the dawn and will reign successfully. but will you even be able to get through this long enough to see the daylight?

the chaos ensues, the fighting spilling from all over now, violence being the only option.

but death may not even be that bad, right? after all, you would admit that he’s kind of cute even. because from a distance, you see the color violet flying your way.

wait. no, no, no, no. it can’t be.

your jaw clenches. your time can’t possibly be up yet? isn’t it too early? but you aren’t even finished?

when the name of death spills through someone’s lips, one may picture him to be a demon or a monster of sorts, but that was far from the truth. rumor has it (and much contrary to the common belief) that he is not but a mere boy who has the most gentle touch making death feel like a small state of slumber. books depict him to be mostly seen in blood red hues with razor yellow teeth ready to consume you. but you remember your previous mentor saying before he passed that he ran into him many times in his travels and that he was wearing a calming dark violet color and was not at all a child of satan’s.

you see him getting closer. you would dare say that he is indeed handsome however the panic settles in. your shallow breaths fail you as a deep and intense fear roots and implants itself down on the bottom of your lungs, leeching and draining you of yourself. now you really wonder if you are truly dead and if this is your real fate. you pray that he made some sort of mistake, arriving too soon.

the angel, the demon, the messenger, the god, the personification, whoever he may be — he finally lands beside you, your shaking hands dropping your bow, suddenly noticing the arrow on your chest.

“you got shot,” he speaks, sounding otherworldly and motioning to the arrow sticking out of your stomach. his loose violet blouse and light brown wavy hair flows with the wind.

you feel more blood rushing out your body. your legs start to give out, but he catches you in his arms. it didn’t feel cold, instead it was warm and gentle.

“you have the best story yet, you know that?” he coos at you, admiring your features.

“do i? really?” you rasp out, eyes getting heavier.

“mhm. you’ll go down in history, my love,” he assures, ready to take flight to the sky with you in his arms. “now, come on,” he whispers tenderly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “let’s get you home.”

© perhapsthanatos (efa)

[sleepypeaky]

oblivious

Ada shelby x female reader

modern au!!!

request: Could I request a fic where fem reader and Ada are crushing on each other, but they're both totally oblivious? Maybe the Shelby brothers (and maybe even Aunt Polly) are trying to get them both to confess, with varying degrees of success

wc: 1.1k

a/n: i decided to make this modern because i wanted it to be more funny without the 20′s homophobia- and obviously ive just omitted that in the past but also this way they could talk in modern words gjdfk 

You grinned at your phone screen and bit your lip, texting back immediately. Your heart was already racing and there was a sum total of like 10 words and 5 gifs.

“texting Ada huh?” Michael said.

Your eyes shot up and you glared at him, “no” You scoffed.

Your face was burning and yeah, of course you were texting Ada.

“Dude just ask her out, she obviously likes you back.” He sighed.

“Why did she say something?” Your ears perked up, smooth (y/n), real smooth.

“I mean no, but all you guys ever talk about is each other, and when she came in here yesterday it was like i was invisible so...”

‘Here’ was referring to the office you and he shared.

You sighed and slumped down in your chair, “maybe you’re right.”

Just then Michael’s phone rang. 

“Hello? Yeah, yeah, ok bye.”

He put the phone back down, 

“That was Tommy, he wants me to tell ada that family meeting is tonight, she’s not answering her phone when he called so he wants me to go there in person.”

He stared at you.

Thinking he was implying something else you suggested that you could text her–

“No.” He stared harder. “Someone can go in person.”

Oh.

You grinned.

With your heart pounding you got up and skipped out of the room.

“You’re welcome!” Michael called after you.

~~~

Ada was sitting in a large arm chair with her feet slung over one side, John was splayed out on the couch absentmindedly scrolling through his phone. 

“John I was talking to you.”

“Huh what?” He said, not taking his eyes off the phone.

She rolled her eyes, “Why are you here right now anyway? Don’t you work,,, and like have a girlfriend?? This isn’t even your house.”

John dropped him phone on his chest and looked over at his sister finally,

“Not that it’s any of your business, but i’m taking a day off” (ada rolled her eyes again) “And my loving girlfriend has requested i take a leave of absence from her presence.”

“...ah, she kicked you out.”

“Thats not what i said!” He insisted defensively, “Anyway who are you to judge my perfectly functional relationship? You can’t even tell (y/n) you are madly in love with her.”

“I am not.” Ada scoffed.

She was.

“Yes you are.”

Yes she was.

“Ok, maybe, but i have my reasons!” She exclaimed.

“Which are?”

“She probably doesn’t feel the same way!”

It was John’s turn to roll his eyes.

As if on queue, the door buzzer rang.

“Hi its (y/n!)”

Both their eyes went wide and Ada zipped to buzz her in.

As they waited, John verticalized himself so he could be alert for the action about to go down. Ada perched nervously on the arm of the chair.

You poked through the door, noticing ada first of course and then John in the background.

“Hi don’t worry i’ll be quick, I guess this goes for both of you but Tommy wants to remind you that your family meeting is tonight.” Though you were technically addressing them both, you were staring right at ada. You had to attempt to be subtle so you dragged your eyes away from her.

“Obviously he can’t take a hint that I didn’t respond because I don’t want to go.” Ada smiled.

“Well don’t shoot the messenger,” You laughed. “I’m just here as a courtesy.”

You waved yourself out and went down the stairs.

“wow.” John whistled at the interaction.

“What? Literally nothing happened.” Ada said.

“Trust me,” John smirked. “I know when women are horny, and-”

“eww john what the fuck.” ada whined and frowned at her brother with disgust.

“Seriously ada just tell her,” John said. “She really does like you and whats the worst thing that could happen, why are you so scared?”

Ada sighed, shockingly, john was right.

“Its because you’re a virgin right?”

Ada threw her hands in the air, “what the bloody fuck is wrong with you get out!”

John snickered and sauntered out the door.

Why she was taking advice from him in the first place.....God she really must be desperate.

--

You cursed yourself for flirting like that. I mean, you like physically couldnt help it. But come on! You thought. 

--

That evening you got a text from Michael:

M: “Hey meet me down at the pub in 20?”

Y: “Sure see you then.”

Good, you thought, I could use a drink.

You threw on your shoes and made your way down to the pub. It wasn’t really crowded tonight, I should have been easy to spot him, but he was no where to be found. Your eyes settled on a different familiar face.

--

Ada looked down at her phone, text from John:

J: “That meeting sucked, pub in 10?”

A: “👍”

Just what i need.

--

Ada looked up at you with a mixture of confusion and delight, you were also taken off guard.

“Uh Hi!” You stammered, “I’m supposed to be meeting Michael here but...”

“Huh, I’m supposed to be meeting John.”

You blinked a couple seconds of silence away, 

“Well i guess I can sit here and wait for him...”

You took a seat next to her. 

As you were both awaiting people, you didn’t enter into a conversation that was to involved. For normal people in this situation, this was to prevent the need to cut a conversation short when their proper date arrived. However the weird choppy banter between you was stunted by your equal urges to keep your feelings down and secret.

After 10 Minutes you looked around,

“He’s still not here?” There was annoyance in your tone, he was you only possible distraction from Ada, and if he wasn’t here in the next like 30 seconds...

Both your phones dinged.

You looked at yours and saw a text from him:

M: “🤙”

You were confused..... but then you got it.

That son of a bitch.

Simultaneously, ada received a text from her wonderful brother:

J: “✌️👀💄👅👉👌👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩🍑🎀🌸🌚🌝👙”

You both looked up at the same time, her face was red, and you could feel the heat in your own cheeks.

“So....i’m assuming neither of them are coming....” She said.

“Seems not...”

You looked at each other for a minute, before you both burst out laughing.

“I’ve been flirting with you for like a year...” Ada laughed.

You cackled,

“I’ve been flirting with you for like a year!”

When the laughter died down you both smiled at each other.

“I dont know its just i thought you didn’t like me like that.” She said.

“-and everyone told me that i was crazy!” You finished.

You both shook your heads at how ridiculous this was.

“Well,” You said. “i guess we have some catching up to do.”

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