#emotion: dull

[carlyraejepsans]

sometimes i think about toriel in that first run when flowey finds her in the RUINs, having her dead son return to her for comfort, broken and helpless, and being unable to provide for him in the one impossible way he desperately needed, "fixing him" "making it okay" the way only his mom should've been able to do.

flowey kills himself after she fails. you ever think about that? cause i think about that. you're gonna tell me she didn't notice? that she was cheerfully oblivious as things failed to get better and he grew more desperate and more hurt and more hopeless, as she failed him like she once did and always will fail him? you're gonna tell me that didn't eat her alive? didn't keep her up at night? didn't break her back into all those tiny little shards of herself she'd glued back together and swept under the carpet by sheer force of will?

do you think she gets nightmares about it, still?

[starry-bi-sky]

more about og tue timeline twins danny and dan/jamie

very touchy with each other. you might even say. ccclingy. its to be expected, they're two halves of a whole after all and all they've got of each other. worryingly co-dependent. do not separate. ever.

Danny was really weak and sick after the initial separation, and was for a while after. Jamie knew internally that if Danny died, he'd take the whole world with it. He was the one sole caretaker for him while he got better -- not for lack of trying on Vlad's part, but without his ghost powers he was nothing more than a feeble (albeit handsomely rich) man, and James looked ready to bite his head off if he got within ten feet of either of them.

Vlad is intimately aware that James (or Danny, if he tried) could snap his spine in half like a twig, and is uncomfortably aware of his own lack of ghost half now. It makes him feel self-conscious and exposed, so he never fully returns back to "cocky and self-assured billionaire Vlad Masters". Making deals with other brands feels a lot harder now that he can no longer possess them anymore.

Speaking of, he very quickly has to come up with a cover story as to why there's now a James Daniel Fenton to the public, when no records whatsoever of him existing existed prior. Lots of forging false government documents on his end. James and Danny do not help because it's his fault this happened in the first place.

(Regardless of whether or not Danny actually willingly chose to rip out his ghost half/humanity in canon is true, or if that was Vlad Masters speaking out of his ass, a large part of the blame still falls on Masters.)

(As his primary caretaker and guardian, it's his responsibility to ensure the health and safety of his charge, and since Danny was in clear emotional duress at the time, it can be argued that he was not in the mental state to make such a decision. And, allegedly, couldn't do it on his own which is why he asked Vlad for help.)

I chose "James" as Dan's name since it's a popular fanon middle name for Danny, and since he's half of Danny, it felt like it just made sense lol. Also because of the ensuing comedy of the two of them introducing themselves as "James Daniel Fenton" and "Daniel James Fenton". It's got the same energy as "danny with a y" and "danny with an i" and it's the exact kind of name bullshit you expect parents to give their twins.

I don't have their exact personalities down, but something I am actively writing into this au's bible is that I think Danny should be the quiet and (ig technically) meaner one. There's a lot to go into about interpretations for ghosts, halfas, and the incident itself, but TL:DW; Danny is technically soulless, or at the very least missing half of his soul (altho Jamie is too just in a different direction).

Pair that with the trauma of losing his family in front of him + having his ghost half ripped out + all the trauma he would've sustained as a hero, and he's not doing too hot mentally! i think if the twins met good timeline!Danny, Danny would've mistaken Danny for Dan and Jamie for the original half.

He comes off to others as pretty apathetic and indifferent to a borderline terrifyingly calm degree. He doesn't go out of his way to insult people, but he also doesn't care enough to consider the other party's feelings so he doesn't filter himself, which makes him come off as rude. The only times he looks truly comfortable is when he's near Jamie or talking to him.

His standoffish, ice prince demeanor makes Jamie look like a saint in comparison. When really he's not all that much better? He's more outwardly emotional than Danny, whether that be positive or negative, but at the end of the day he doesn't trust or care about anyone else any more than Danny does, and he's got a bit of a sadistic streak. Danny reigns him in when he starts becoming too destructive.

(Which I think makes sense. Danny asked Vlad to rip out his ghost half specifically so he could stop feeling his human emotions. Dan, despite his monotone voice, does exhibit emotions. He's smug when he asks Valerie if he likes his ghostly wail, sardonic when he reunites with Sam and Tucker, annoyed, shocked at Danny's ghostly wail, etc. He enjoys wreaking destruction and chaos.)

(If Danny had survived his encounter with Dan and if Vlad was successful, then I imagine he'd be rather apathetic to his other half as a whole. That'd be interesting.)

Overall though they're both hurt, bitter, and distrustful of the world around them, with abandonment issues a mile wide. They can get better and they can heal, but it takes time and patience and proper support.

On the DPxDC side of things, they do genuinely hold some kind of respect or regard for Bruce. They also don't become vigilantes for a while. Neither of them are jumping at the bit to enter heroism again, not when it was heroism that killed their family in the first place.

In fact when they find out Bruce = Batman they think he's foolish for it. They think its a fool's errand, and they've been so spurned by their time as Phantom that for a few weeks, Jamie even refused to call Bruce anything but Sisyphus. Danny called him Tantalus, and the two of them had a faux-argument about which one was more accurate.

Bruce does, though, worm his way into both of their hearts, and that's like, the main reason they become vigilantes to join him. So that they could keep him safe and not because of any desire to return to the heroic life. Relearning to care and finding satisfaction in helping others was an unintentional side effect.

(Bruce is so very smug)

Essentially:

The Twins: this is our squishy and fragile adoptive father. If anything happened to him, we're becoming mass extinction events.

Bruce: Nnno.

[hughmanbean]

The Moon Looks Back

As a child, Bruce liked to stargaze with his parents. It was something that connected them, and soothed him in a way hard to describe.

That hadn't changed, after the night in the alley, when he went soul searching, or even when he took up the cape. It certainly hadn't stopped after all these years, with all of his children beside him.

During his trek around the world, he regarded the moon as a sort of companion, ever-changing but consistent. It stuck with him, even just by existing.

He stargazes less often, of course, with everything he does nowadays. But he still takes time to look at the night sky, constellations and childhood friend still there.

Of course, he didn't know that it was actually alive. And he'd really of appreciated if he didn't have to learn that while stranded in space.

---

It was nice to just relax when things got a bit difficult. The moon was a nice little cove for Danny to just decompress and watch the world go by.

One such benefit was that he could see those who looked to him as the moon. The grandfather of a family, watching the sky as the kids go to sleep, the couple on a late night date, and the astronomers that study the stars.

Amongst them, one Bruce Wayne stood out. In the beginning, just the child of a wealthy family, though after the death of his parents he continued to look to Danny. Every once in a while, Danny would sense Bruce, in some drastically different location and situation.

Eventually, he seemed to settle back down in Gotham. Though not without a few new habits, so to speak.

Now, this was an opportunity to finally talk face to face. After all, it wasn't everyday he got the chance to speak to such an interesting stargazer in person.

[lumons]

kind of toying around with the theory that mdr is sorting out their own experiences and memories to create the rooms that gemma is going into. gemma’s rooms happen to be personal in some ways to her (the thank you cards) because mark is the one refining for her rooms. 

when mark asks about the ashes, reghabi tells him that lumon is connected with the coroners and medical examiners and we already know lumon has such a deep place within society given that they hosted the blood drive where mark and gemma met, they owned the clinic where they went for fertility care, and there’s the government official with his severed wife and the baby camp. lumon is everywhere and they’re always listening and they’re always trying to pull the strings. it’s possible that when gemma got into her accident, lumon saved her and part of this was healing her and treating her until she was fully better until they could turn around and say actually you’re not fully better yet and we need to run tests on you. lumon is in a position of power as the rescuers and saviors of her life to convince her and keep her in this place as a condition and price of her life saving treatment. 

and gemma’s probably far from the only one that lumon has done this to. they’re probably getting more test subjects through these horrific accidents and near death experiences and just repeating this research with them. when mark is first shown petey’s map one area notably is the people who live there/never leave. this sort of tells us that gemma is far from the only one and also why would she be the only one when there’s also the work of helly, irving, and dylan to consider, and of course all the other mdr departments out there in other lumon offices. 

this theory would help explain the work the other refiners are doing and make the explanation of what lumon is up to less centered specifically mark and gemma, and instead make mark and gemma just a tragic coincidence of this whole controlling corporate giant.

as to what they’re doing this for i think there’s so many possibilities but i have to assume, as is the name, mthat they’re refining the severance chips and working towards making them better and possibly commercializing them to offer people an escape from various life experiences that might be distressing or unwanted and they need the various experience of humans to do that and therefore the mdr teams are just sorting their different fears and joys and other emotions to essentially test gemma and the others like her with 

[starsonablackboard]

the fact that (almost) the first thing kris does after yeeting their soul at noelle's house is go play piano for a while is breaking me. like, they miss it. and they can't play it when the player controls them, so the only way to access one of their few hobbies, one of the few things that make them happy (also one of the few things they have left of dess since it's implied she was the one who played the piano in holidays' house) is to violently and painfully claw their soul out of themselves is brutal

[ma4chestier]

wind breaker ch172 spoilers

this was GREAT this was PAIN this was CUTE all at the SAME FUCKIG TIME and i cant decide whether i love it or want to rip my heart out

i kinda was expecting kiryu to be the rich kid in the group (come on, dont tlel me he doesnt have thee looks) but that was a HUGE FUCKING ASS home, and the fcat that he lives in a tiny house next to the main one and that his family can pay desserts that us simple mortals would have to wait AGES to buy is clearly a sign of how rich they truly are.

i mean, its amazing that we finally get to see some of his backstory, ngl kiryu was interesting since the first time he was introduced, and i fucking loooove his dynamic with tsugeora and suo separately like they are so dorky i love them

and we can see just why he is so protective of women, sinc ehe has a sister and shes probably the only member of his family that he loves and cares for. oooouuuuu i can feel a trauma dumping when i see one, especially when its clearly sakura can relate to the feeling even when its not tbe same situation

AAAAAAAA TALKING AB SAKURAA

My Poor Baby hasnt registered yet that kiryu is rich rich hes soooo excited to go to a friends house

aaaaaaaaaa aaa i just love their frienship way too much they mean the world to me

also, the silent panels give some eary feeling about all these. we had a lready seen that bedroom like three or four chapters ago, in the beach episode but we didnt kno why he libvd there. now youre telling me he had PARENTS THAT not only did they NOT loved him, but tretaed him as if he was a monster???????? (i mean we dont know for sure if those are hsi parents they could be foster family for all we know) AND HE HAD A SIBLING WHAT THE HELL 😭😭😭

cant help but notkced how serious he got from being excited to be in kiryu's house to be a dull shell without emotions symphathizing with kiryu about their families. this just kills me man. they deserv better

[lemqny]

DISCORD EMOTES! Not sure if this needs a warning but I'll give one anyway! Contains emojis depicting numbness/dullness, be careful!

[rununcal]

Stave Off the Thoughts, Whoever You Are!

I draw him like how straight renaissance painters think about women

[helluvahotmess]

might be a hot take but i think even if blitz was about to say sorry at the end of full moon it was already too late? cause stolas was very clearly not in the right emotional headspace for it to really sink in or mean anything at that point.

it was too late way before blitz realised stolas was hurt (and saying sorry in that moment wasn't gonna make stolas' emotions magically reset to neutral)

emotions were running wayyy too high that immediately talking right after the initial conflict/argument was not gonna fix it

(and to clarify not hating either character! very much on the camp of they both fucked up and they need to talk but neither are in the right headspace for that talk just yet)

[bookshelf-in-progress]

It turns out that I never research because it makes me think the details are the point instead of the story.

The story is the point! It doesn't matter if I don't have an entire world with all its history and cultural and political customs realistically fleshed out! Focus on the story and fill in the details later!

[angelic-waffles]

Roger has ASPD, Simon has BPD, awe yis, cluster b gang

[parasiticallyyours]

i wonder if i ever make her feel guilty

[demeterdefence]

1) persephone can pick up pianos now

2) it took me a couple minutes to realize this was a piano because it FADES INTO THE BACKGROUND WITH ALL THAT WEAK ASS COLOURING

[totally-transfem]

In a late night fit of clarity I had the following thoughts:

1) I'm gonna make everyone around me uncomfortable

2) I'm never gonna be accepted

3) I'm more of a girl than a woman in my mind, and I'm not sure I can do that because of my body shape (not thin, (mbi says obese so I'll use that) obese)

3.5) I could try and lose weight but idk if I'm strong willed enough to be part of the 10%

4) what if this is a mistake, all of this. What if I'm just feeling down (background emotion) for some reason other than gender identity and agab being different. Would it really be so bad to just live as a man? Maybe I should just listen to my parents. They've been through more than I have, I'm just a teen constantly flooded with hormones clouding their judgement. He/him doesn't even feel wrong, she/her is just more aesthetically pleasing. I think it makes me more queesy. Is that queesiness just what I'm feeling with all of this? Is my emotional blunting worse than I thought and feeling something new just so appealing it's making me question my gender identity? Why does imagining myself as trans instead of just an afab person make me uncomfortable.

[soupnoodle]

my friend who went to see the new master and margarita movie, not familiar with the book: what the fuck is going on

me, watching the new master and margarita movie, familiar with the book: what the fuck is going on

[stheresya]

I find the possibility of a victarion vs euron greyjoybowl to be as boring and uninspired as cleganebowl. mostly because the people pushing for it are usually dudebros who project onto victarion and wish to see him restore the "honor" of his wounded masculinity through displays of brute violence.

aeron vs euron greyjoybowl however………