#enough time has passed that I pretty much forgotten the specifics of each episode.

[uovoc]

Danny Phantom is a solidly okay, so-so kind of cartoon, unless you have specific Danny Phantom-shaped receptors in your brain, in which case it is sublime

[eponymous-rose]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E131 (March 30, 2021)

Tonight’s guests are Liam O’Brien and Sam Riegel!

Brian points out that a lot of Caleb’s greatest fears have come to pass. Liam: “It’s funny, because he’d kind of believed for a while that those things weren’t going to happen. After a while, he got complacent.” He notes that it was extra wild because everything with Trent popped up again in the midst of that complacency. And how did it feel to be defiant toward Trent? “I think Trent successfully made Caleb question if Caleb really was in control“ at the dinner party. “I feel like anything that I do is part of his plans for me, or is that just gaslighting? I’m legitimately scared of that dude.” Sam: “Of Matt?” Liam: “Sure.” He highlights the disconnect between knowing that the M9 is mechanically powerful and could possibly defeat Trent in a dice-and-stats battle, versus fearing him in a story sense and being convinced he can do almost anything.

Sam, on Luc’s death: “That was brutal, man. Matt Mercer is a-- he hates children! Clearly. He actively sought to kill a child in the campaign in as brutal a way as possible. He hates children and wants them dead. Canon. No, but to RP, that was horrible.” He highlights that so much of Veth’s arc has been about trying to get back to her family. “We had to choose something and we thought we were making the right choice. It was all Veth’s fault, and it was pretty rotten. My heart was beating pretty fast, and I certainly didn’t want to have my son die live on the stream. I don’t know what Veth would have done. That’s the end, that’s over. It’s almost worse than when your own character would die. This is something that would also kill Veth.” After the episode was over: “just shaken. I also didn’t know what to do next! That felt like a turning-point moment for my character, weirdly so close to what we assume to be the end arc of this campaign. I texted Matt later that night and was like, that’s it, Veth’s out, I’m tapping out.”

There’s an interlude in which Sam discovers a new dream to record an episode of this show from his Peloton. Dani informs him that she will not be inviting him back.

On Astrid, Liam: “I literally don’t know what she’s doing. I know that she’s dangerous, she always was ambitious, and there’s not been a moment where Caleb let his guard down with her. He’s not trying to reestablish what they had. He cares for the both of them, for Astrid and Eodwulf. He thinks about it a lot, still. He can’t tell how much she buys into everything that she experienced and is now living as a full-grown adult. He suspects that she’s bought in and is not going to change things, because she believes in the system, as much as he’d like to peel her away. He does believe that they want what’s best for the Empire, and stopping whatever wants to come vomiting out of a hole in the frozen north is good for everyone. And they’re powerful. They’re not trustworthy, obviously. But there’s enough at stake to make it worth it. He could imagine a situation where they fight each other to the death.” He was convinced Astrid was going to stop them when they left the tower and was really shocked when she held back. Sam: “Not me! I’ve trusted Astrid since day one. She’s the greatest! I sent a letter to her, she’s very nice, I think you guys would be a nice couple. I believe every word she says.”

On having to decide on Veth deciding to go off and save the world after Luc’s death. “Like I said, I was ready to be done. And then I decided somewhere in there that that’s not very D&D. So I thought I’d leave it up to somebody else, so I asked Caduceus to decide for me, essentially. She knows she’s putting her other family in danger if she doesn’t go. It’s an impossible choice, you know?” Liam: “I love watching you grapple with it, because you’re a lovely father and love your kids.”

On the Sanatorium, Sam: “That was brutal, man. Matt lulls you into a sense of complacency. We’d forgotten that Caleb was a stone-cold killer! It had been a while since he went on a murder spree. Still got it!” Liam: “I never meant for this character to be perfect sunshine.” Brian: “You don’t say.” Liam: “He’s very not-perfect, and I think in his brain, he was going in with the impression that they needed to get in and get out as soon as possible. The place is crawling with people with magic ability, and I didn’t have faith that we wouldn’t be sussed out or something wasn’t going to blow an illusion.” Everything was about getting out of there as fast as possible.

Did the conversation with Yeza help with Veth’s decision? “First of all, every conversation with Yeza is a beautiful one. Every time she talks to Yeza, it makes her feel good. In some ways, she’s gotten to the point now where she knows Yeza’s going to be supportive, she knows he’s going to allow her to do what she wants, but maybe that’s too much. Maybe she needs to not listen to him, basically, and be like, no, you need to be selfish now, dude, you need to say ‘come home, I’m sick of you leaving’. At a certain point, being supportive can turn into being enabling.”

Cosplay of the Week: Jester in the snow! (liljerbear47, photography by kairiceleste on Instagram)

On Trent’s motivations for chasing Caleb: “I really don’t know. The simplest explanation is to just hammer down the nail that’s sticking up. It has crossed his mind that all high-level wizards are in danger of their own ambition and egos, so it’s occurred to him that Trent might have the same kind of ideas that Halas had in the past, and maybe Caleb was always meant to be another body to jump into. Maybe in some sick, disgusting, twisted way, he wants him to be his successor. I am thinking of the next campaign, without getting too deep in, trying to do something that is much more ride-along. Caleb is very, very specific, and I thought long and hard about all the different pieces on the chessboard for him. For campaign three, I’m looking forward to seeing what happens.”

Dani: “Do I need to be keeping lore on your fucking ads?”

On the cursed dagger: “It was a tricky one, because in campaign one, one of the characters was under the influence of a cursed weapon, but it interacted with him and he knew what it was and what it did. And it affected his gameplay as a character. For me, Veth didn’t know what it was, ever. I as a player knew what it was doing, but Veth didn’t know at all. So it was kind of like my dirty, dark secret for many months. I knew this thing was coming perilously close to killing me, but my character didn’t know enough to bring it up to her friends. Nobody ever asked! So I was like, well, I guess this thing’s just going to kill me one day, and it’s kind of going to be a surprise.” Liam: “Sam, you love danger and self-destruction so much, you might as well be Mollymauk.”

On the fight in Yasha’s sequence, Sam: “You gotta put a character in your storm giant creature. It was so fun! It was so great of Matt to involve us in this encounter. It would’ve been fun just to watch, because Matt would have made it amazing and Ashley was sweating bullets, which is always fun to watch.” Sam notes he felt guilty, but Liam was going for the kill. Liam: “Matt’s gotta be careful about giving me that kind of story beat. I do not fucking care, I just fucking flip, I’m like, well, I’m going to destroy you, and I have no qualms about it. It’s too much fun!”

The Beau/Yasha tower date was in part inspired by not being able to give gifts as easily this last year. “This thing that we do together is a gift, but I love finding these moments, like the book for Jester and the tower for Yasha and for Beau. I really just wanted to give both of them a little magic for a night. I wanted them to leave this-- we’re trying to be as entertaining as possible, but shit is having an effect on all of us too, and I wanted them to have an escape, a great place to escape to.”

Fan Art of the Week: an amazing group shot, plus Marion, Yeza, and Luc! (vocaz on Twitter)

On choosing Essek over Trent, Liam: “It would have been so interesting and awful and great! Essek and Astrid and Eodwulf are everything that Bren used to be attracted to that are terrible for him. Essek, hopefully he can with time find a way out of the hole that he dug himself into, but it was only two months ago where he was found out and his ambitions came crashing down around him. Long-term, I have high hopes for him, but I think it’s going to be hard.” In contrast, Astrid and Eodwulf are still “deep in the shit. It would have been really hard to navigate, but fun to play at the table. We made the right choice with what we went with. Essek’s just getting started, and Caleb doesn’t trust him entirely, because he was burned so hard not too long ago. He’s still more trustworthy than the other three. So it’s the better choice. While Caleb has all these ties on the other side, they’re really fucking dangerous. So if you have to choose, you choose Essek. But fuck that die.” Sam: “Veth, much like Sam Riegel, makes instant decisions about whether to trust someone or not and sticks to it forever. Astrid, 100% trust. Eodwulf, 100% distrust. Essek, completely distrust. I still don’t think he’s a good guy. Ikithon? Trust. 100%. Because you know where he’s coming forward, you know what he wants. I still want him dead, but I trust him.”

On Veth’s post-adventuring plans: “Veth is probably still too in it right now to think about what comes next. I, Sam Riegel, have a good idea of what I want Veth to do post-campaign.” Brian: “Maybe you shouldn’t tell us. Save it for the show!” Sam: “All she knows is she can’t do this anymore. It’s very unhealthy to be battle-wounded every other day. It’s fun for a while, but college has to end at some point, and she’s gotta go home.”

On Frumpkin changing appearance and returning to the Feywild: “I don’t know what I’m going to do, but the way it feels now for Caleb is that he feels too enmeshed in everything that has happened, and too much good has happened, and too much needs to happened, that that really narcissistic, selfish goal has the risk of harming everything else, which is more important. And that’s how he looks at it now. So he’s gearing towards letting everything from the beginning of the campaign, and where he started, go, and trying to figure out what use he’s going to be now and what he’s going to do if they’re not all dead. If Matt throws that shit down, I don’t know what I will do, I think about it a lot. But turning Frumpkin white and saying you’re free either way is him preparing to let go of everything he’s been holding on to for a really long time. He’s addicted to that idea that he can fix himself, and we’ll see if that hard choice gets presented, what he might do. But where he stands now, he doesn’t think that’s going to be reality, and he sees a way that he can be of use that he never really anticipated before, so he’s slowly shifting gears towards living with the pain he was trying to remove.”

On the last request scene and confidence heading into Aeor, Sam: “I feel like that’s a good request. I think all of us realized that if we die, that probably bodes badly for the world. I feel like all of us are at a point now as characters and as friends, that the first order of business would be to take care of everybody else’s shit, although we probably have different ideas of how to do that.” Liam: “I want the Empire to be healed, Caleb has all these memories of his parents and what they wanted for the world, and he wants that too. It’s clearly not in place now, the system needs to be broken and replaced. That could be a part of Caleb’s sunset. I don’t want Caleb to die, so maybe he can work on that after. As everything starts to shake out and we start heading towards our destiny, Caleb’s just free-floating. He’s not even going after the same thing he started for. So he’s looking at Veth’s family, and Luc specifically, and seeing that’s me, that’s a little boy in the Empire.”

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression, radio version - Ep 24, March 2016 - 5th Anniversary of 3/11, Human canvass artwork, Kyo hayfever, Actress childless by choice, Celeb Instagram spat.

Kaoru starts this episode by commenting that that it was the 5th anniversary of the 2011 March 11th earthquake and tsunami. Joe says that as well as visiting the destroyed nuclear reactor, he also spent time in Fukushima. He says that 5 years is a turning point for residents, because this is the point at which government financial grants run out. After this, the residents must support themselves. Having spoken to the locals, Joe says that even if support were to continue, it may not be efficient. The more time passes, the more difficult it gets to know if the support is getting to where it is really required. Locals have compained about the number of volunteers, for example. They don't need that many now. Additionally, there are many people in the area, especially the elderly, who really do need help, but who tend to shoulder their load alone, rather than reach out. For example, people who require help with transportation to hospitals etc. These people are not asking for money, which makes it difficult to know how to help. Kaoru stresses that no matter how many years pass, this disaster must never be forgotten.

Kaoru's topic of interest this time is the British artist Eliza Bennett and her work 'A Woman's Work is Never Done'. In this work Bennett used her own palm as a canvass to stitch in coloured thread, and it has recieved a lot of attention, some quite harsh. Joe asks Kaoru what he thinks about this. Kaoru says he's not entirely sure, but it seems like it wouldn't be possible without some kind of painful trigger, and she may have let it go too far. It looks almost like a highly-evolved prank. But at the same time, he's pretty impressed by it. The thought of sewing thread into your own hand is pretty shocking to him. He says that because of what he's done to his own body (tattoos), he is in no place to tell others what to do with theirs, but still, this makes him uneasy.

Next they are joined by Dobashi for the Tokyo Sports corner. Dobashi asks them both how they are managing with hayfever. Joe says he is fine. Kaoru says he usually suffers a bit just at the start of hayfever season, but after that he is ok. Dobashi says he has been trying out pollen desensitization therapy, and is nervous to see if it will actually work during Spring. Kaoru says that Kyo has tried the same thing. Having hayfever during lives is pretty annoying for him. Dobashi asks whether Kyo ever sneezes during lives. Kaoru doesn't think he does, but then again, maybe he does when he turns his back to the audience.

Dobashi's first news story is that the actress Yamaguchi Tomoko had done an interview for the womans' magazine 'Frau' in which she stated very clearly that she never wants to become a mother. Many of the magazine's readers agreed with her, making this a big talking point in the media. Dobashi says from one perspective anyone is free do as they please, and there is nothing really wrong with this decision, but on the other hand, Japan is facing a population crisis. Who will support the elderly in years to come? Should it be a responsibility to have children? Kaoru states also very clearly that this should totally be up to the individual to decide freely. He asks if anything happened to Yamaguchi in her childhood to influence her outlook. Dobashi says, her parents divorced when she was 6, her little sister was raised by her mother, and she was raised by her father. So she probably does not put much faith in the idea of a conventional family. She probably doesn't feel the need to have children, and feels happy without them. Kaoru agrees with this. Joe says that people have a right to be happy without being classed as a statistic in the declining population. People should not face this issue with indifference - it does need serious thought, but at the same time lifestyle choices should be respected. Kaoru then brings up the problem of the aging population, specifically recent news of over-stressed care workers abusing residents in care homes. What are they doing there? They knew what the job would involve. He feels quite strongly about this, but stops himself before he gets carried away with it.

Dobashi's next story is that the singer Oshio Manabu (formally convicted and imprisioned for drugs offenses) had posted a photo on Instagram of himself with his arms round the shoulder of soccer player Kashiwagi Yosuke. Kashiwagi had subsequently spoken out to the effect that, 'He's not my friend, I barely know him'. Oshio had then tweeted 'You liar!', or words to that effect. Dobashi says Kashiwagi is probably under pressure from the soccer association to distance himself from such dubious individuals if he wants to gain a more prominent image in Japanese soccer. Kaoru thinks this is pretty interesting, and wonders whether these guys are actually friends. No one seems to really know, but they look pretty chummy on the photo. They probably weren't the closest of pals though. Kaoru thinks they should have been more straightforward with each other if that was the case. Dobashi says he once caught up with Oshio in Narita Airport, while Oshio was on his was to Hawaii. At the time, he was dating actress Yada Akiko, but his management didn't approve of the relationship, which meant he could be fired if he persisted with it. Dobashi interrogated him about whether he was going to choose 'love' or 'Liv' (the name of his band). Oshio apparently laughed loudly at this. Kaoru thinks Oshio seems like an interesting guy, although he has never met him. He thinks sponsers are probably behind the pressure being put on Kashiwagi to deny association with Oshio. He says it looks kinda cute, seeing Oshio trying to up his image by posing with a J-league player.

To finish, Kaoru reads out some messages from  listeners stating that despite many other fans saying they want some solo material from Kaoru, they do not want him to start a solo project, they think he is just fine in Dir en grey. Kaoru says he hasn't even announced any solo plans! But when he sees so many message with such strong feelings towards Dir en grey, he feels happy. Dir en grey is too busy, and song writing takes up enough of his time anyway.

[enkelimagnus]

Literature

Bucky Barnes Gen, 1756 words, rated T for Hydra shit

Jewish Bucky Barnes, The Falcon and the Winter Soldier: Episode 3 Power Broker

Sam falls asleep on the plane over to Madripoor and leaves Bucky and Zemo alone. They actually talk to each other. I would say it's nice.

TW: brief allusion to past rape, internalized homophobia, brief mention of the holocaust

Read on AO3

Part 20 of Making a Home - the Jewish Bucky series

--------------

It’s an eleven hour flight from Berlin to Madripoor, even with Zemo’s private jet. Once drinks have been served, food has been eaten and threats have been made, they all find themselves settling.

Sam has dozed off on a seat, seemingly exhausted. After all, they’ve already travelled the eight hours from the states, and the day has been stressful at best. At least, Sam trusts him enough to fall asleep while Bucky watches Zemo. He wasn’t expecting that. Or perhaps his human physiology is betraying him.

Bucky needs less sleep than a normal human on regular days, and he also can survive much longer sleep deprived. He’s well aware of the limitations of his body. Hydra tested them thoroughly and multiple times. Zemo would know as well, that Bucky might look tired but it doesn’t diminish his abilities as much as it seems.

The man in question is at his seat with his book, though he’s regularly looking up through the windows of the plane or around the cabin. There’s something quiet and wistful about the way he stares at a spot where the carpeting is not perfectly set against the wall to the bathroom.

The silence is good, especially after earlier, where Sam and Zemo somehow managed to gang up on him about Marvin Gaye of all people.

It’s not that Bucky doesn’t like Marvin Gaye. He just doesn’t like much music. He’s sort of lost the taste for it. His brain is usually unable to perceive it as anything but unnecessary noise that keeps him from being completely aware of his surroundings. And at least 40s music doesn’t have death and rape associated to it.

And he doesn’t need to know what Steve thought of it, whether Steve loved it or not. He’s not Steve. Steve journeyed light into the 21st century. Everything was something new to learn and experience, it was exciting and bright. Bucky is travelling with baggage. And he has memories attached to songs and tastes and sensations and events.

Bucky simply can’t use the notebook the way Steve did.

Sometimes, he wonders if Sam forgets Bucky wasn’t simply on ice for 80 years. The issue with him is that he lived through most of it, and it was all torture.

Or maybe not all . He woke up craving Karpov’s kasha the other week, and it makes no sense. He only tasted it during one specific time of his life, when Karpov and him got stuck in a safehouse in the snow, with no way to reach the outside world, for two weeks. The Soldier’s rations and formulas ran out long before they were able to leave. Karpov was too smart to let him starve, and perhaps that time alone with the Soldier, away from the world, with no way to freeze him or unplug him had made him see he was still a man. The kasha was warm, and thick, and sweet and sometimes, Bucky remembers that feeling and craves it.

The danger with people like him, America’s Super Soldiers, is that we put them on pedestals.

Zemo’s right.

In all honesty, Bucky believes he’s forgotten who Steve really was.

Memories become blurry when they age and no matter how desperate Bucky is to crystalize them, to remember them, to be sure of what he lived, all he manages to do is to frame faded photographs and fill in the blanks himself.

Steve and him didn’t have time. He found him after two years of searching, only for Bucky to be back on ice within two weeks. After that, Steve visited a few times during his recovery, when he introduced him to the goats he’d named after the sisters he finally remembered. And then, there was the War, and the Snap and once Bucky was back to life, Steve was shattered. And two weeks later, he was gone.

They didn’t have time to learn each other again. Bucky doesn’t know who Steve is anymore, half of his memories feel tainted by Smithsonian explanations, and he hates it so fucking much.

He hates that he can’t remember right, he hates that Steve’s slipping away from him every second of every day, that all that is left is the fucking shield and Captain America. That Steve’s legacy doesn’t seem to run deeper than that, else Bucky would have less of a single-minded focus on that fucking piece of useless fucking metal.

It’s only been three months. Why does Steve feel like he’s been gone for a lifetime?

Bucky breathes out a shuddering breath.

When his eyes focus again, Zemo is staring at him.

The book is open on his lap. Bucky can read the title. Same Sex Fantasies in Heterosexuals. Fucking hell. He doesn’t need that right now. At all.

“You’re a different man than the one I remember,” Zemo says quietly after a moment. His voice is soft, just slightly above a whisper. He knows Bucky has sharp ears. He knows he doesn’t need to wake Sam up.

Bucky dignifies that with a huff and looks away for a moment. Zemo’s eyes don’t leave him. He can feel them on him, on his face, on his throat, on his hands, on his body. They make him itch. They make him want to punch him for looking at him like that.

Like what?

You know exactly like what.

When Bucky looks back, Zemo’s indeed still watching him.

“You’re old now,” Bucky says eventually, in a vague answer to what Zemo said earlier.

“Eight years have passed, James. You cannot blame a normal man for something he has no control over.”

Eight years. So Bucky was right. Zemo wasn’t dusted. He stayed in that solitary confinement cell for eight years as the world moved on around him, as the world fought and lost half of its people.

Had he wished to be one of the ones that were snapped out of existence? Probably. After all, every second Zemo breathes and exists is a second more he wasn’t supposed to have. He tried to kill himself in Siberia, once his mission was over.

“Do you ever read normal stuff?” Bucky asks, a bite in his words.

Zemo raises an eyebrow, head tilting slightly to the side. His eyes are still glued to Bucky’s face. He still wants to punch him.

“I would need you to define ‘normal stuff’ to answer this question.” There is a hint of mirth in those brown eyes though. He knows exactly what Bucky means.

Bucky huffs and rolls his eyes. “Machiavelli, fucking… whatever this shit is,” he makes a motion of his chin towards the book. It’s in German, something about boundaries in relationships. Hilarious, really. It’s not like Zemo has anyone to set boundaries with. Unless those eight years of solitary have somehow driven a rift between Zemo and his own dick. “That’s not normal stuff. Novels, popular stuff…”

“I wonder,” Zemo starts. “Have you any recommendations for titles of ‘popular stuff’ for me?”

Everything Bucky can think of is old. He’d told himself he’d look into acquiring books but… he hadn’t had the time or the energy.

“I see your taste in literature has elected to stay with your taste in music, then.”

Fucking ass. Bucky closes his eyes and sighs so heavily he’s pretty sure Sam’s going to wake up.

“To answer your question, James,” Zemo starts, conversationally, as if they aren’t enemies, as if they are just old friends, so old they have become strangers. “I do read normal stuff.” The phrasing is foreign in his mouth, in that accented voice of his. “I’ve read all the classics, and children’s literature. Eight years are long. I practiced my Russian with translations of Harry Potter and the Lord of the Rings at first.”

Bucky hums, looking up at him for a moment. “I noticed your pronunciation had changed,” he says quietly. “Did you read it to yourself out loud? Pretended someone was telling you a story?”

It’s cheap. They’re both aware of how lonely the past eight years must have been. It’s cheap, and it’s low-hanging and Bucky almost feels guilty.

Zemo’s small smile doesn’t reach his eyes.

“Have you read Jules Verne?” Bucky asks, trying to erase his taunt with some more literary conversation. “Was obsessed with his work as a kid. Kinda like Tolkien, but even better because it was… full of invention, not of magic.”

There’s a floating moment, a few seconds of Zemo just watching him with that slight sadness in his eyes before it is washed away and replaced by a hum.

“I’ve read those books, yes. In the original French,” Zemo points out and Bucky is almost grateful for the boasting. “You should seek a new translation, if you’re not adept at the original language. The one I assume you read was a descendant of 1870 translations, riddled with errors and political censorship. They fixed that in the 60s. You’ll like the new ones better.”

Bucky raises an eyebrow. “I’ll take that under consideration, I guess.” He’s so sure he’ll like it.

“And if you find yourself in the north of France one of these days, you should stop by this little city called Amiens,” Zemo continues. “A fine place, old and new, in the way only Europe can be. Jules Verne died there. The city’s positively themed after the man and his work. You can even visit his house.”

Visiting a dead man’s last residence? “That’s kinda morbid,” he mutters and Zemo has a small chuckle.

“People visit Anne Frank’s house as if the walls aren’t hollowed with fear,” he points out. “Dying makes one the public’s intimate friend. You know that better than anyone else.” He gives Bucky a sidelong glance. They both know he’s talking about Steve, and the documentaries and exhibits and think-pieces.

Bucky nods quietly and looks back through the window. The sun is painted indigo and pink. It’s beautiful. He’s forgotten the sunset could be this beautiful.

When he looks at Zemo again, he notices the exhaustion written all over his face, in the small wrinkles and under eye bags and the way his eyes won’t settle on anything for too long, desperate to stay awake.

“I’m not gonna kill you,” Bucky says after a moment. “We need you.”

Zemo chuckles tiredly, a soft and muted sound. “If that is the one thing that is keeping me alive… I believe I shall keep myself useful, then.” It’s almost sarcastic. A man living on borrowed time, wishing desperately he could be executed.

“You do that.”

[eclectic-aussie]

Random Thoughts #15

Well damn, that was a heavy episode. I kind of regret stumbling on tumblr before watching the episode because the ending was spoiled but at the same time it gave me time to brace myself for it, though my hearts still sore at the betrayal even if Bellamy thinks it’s like chipping Madi: done for the greater good.

But after seeing the promo for next week I’m also regretting not waiting until all the episodes aired so I could binge watch them BECAUSE GOD DAMN IT, I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT AND I WANT TO KNOW NOW!! Which is only the second time I’ve really felt that way all season, the first after last weeks episode when Clarke came back.

I can’t help but wonder at a few possibilities that might come up; the Conductor accused Bellamy of selfish obsessive love (though honestly I’d say that’s more his girlfriend than him, but not the point) and Bellamy past insecurities and self doubt/loathing makes him blind to the good he’s done (he convinced Madi to spare the prisoners and bring them with them on the Eligius, put the Flame in Madi to try and make a peace treaty with the Eligius which became moot after Murphy accidentally on purpose put McCreary in charge just to name 2)

But what I think may come up is that while the Conductor decided Bellamy’s love is selfish, they’re going to be probing Clarke’s mind against her will (there’s a word for that, and I can’t help but think that’s going to come up later when Bellamy becomes himself again) and they’re going to realise that Clarke loves selflessly to the point where she will sacrifice her life over and over again for others she barely knows. She has taken on the pain and loss, breaking herself over and over again to protect her people. Even Roan mentioned it in season 4 when he and Bellamy were taking the Hydrozene to Raven at Becca’s lab when Bellamy scoffed at Roan for only caring about his people and Roan pointed out that Bellamy was no different and everyone was looking out for themselves (PAUSE) except maybe Clarke.

Some predictions and questions I have after this week’s episode, and seeing the promos, for the fun of it and I want to get them out:

1.Becho will break-up. It’s something I’ve said since last season, but remember a week ago when Echo was going to genocide Bardo in Bellamy’s name? Remember in the promo Echo telling Bellamy he’s ‘lost himself?’ And how Bellamy is now a member of the cult that Echo tried to massacre? You really don’t think Cadogan’s going to give the body count to Bellamy when he asks why they’re locked up? I think we’ll get a scene where Bellamy ends their relationship with Echo maybe even telling her that it took the almost genocide to realise that he had wanted so badly that who she was on the Ring was who she really was, but her actions on Bardo showed she hadn’t really changed and that she still chose to make the same mistakes as before Praimfaya but now for Spacekru instead of Azgeda. Probably ending with Raven telling Echo that it was just the brainwashing and they’ll be back together when he’s better and other things of that nature which are coddling (like how both women are treated in the show. Sorry, couldn’t resist) and unlikely. I think it will probably come after the scene where Bellamy gives Cadogan the picture of his family and he burns it to prove his detachment from personal ties. Then again he’s a sociopath so…

2.Clarke will be tortured in the M-Cap machine. Yes, we all know this will happen because of the promo, and also in the promo is the fact that Clarke is fighting it; evidenced by the black blood streaming down each side of her face as the points dig into her skull. We also know Bellamy is there watching her being tortured and as far as we know doing nothing to stop it besides probably telling her to just co-operate. I know everyone is hoping this will be where Bellamy hears the radio calls, but I don’t think that’s what’s going to happen. Now hear me out: Clarke is in that chair because Cadogan wants all info he can get about the Flame and who might have more info about it, do you really think he’s just going to stand there with his newest recruit, who he believes is the key to controlling Clarke, while her memories of her love of Bellamy possibly work to undo his indoctrination? No, I think Cadogan will use Bellamy to establish a neural link and then when he realises the threat Clarke poses to keeping Bellamy as his disciple, he’ll send him away, possibly to talk to his other friends and try to ‘reason’ with them. I also think this would be a wonderful time to have Clarke relive Echo trying to kill her ‘to avenge Bellamy’ while Raven and Shaw watch and Madi orders her down using a Heda order (not that Cadogan will know that), because it will show a previous ‘kill to avenge Bellamy’ moment that will solidify Bellamy’s belief that his break-up with Echo was the right choice, but it would also work in Cadogan’s favour of ‘selfless love over selfish love’ and the danger of personal attachments, especially if he was looking for her more recent attempt to ‘avenge Bellamy’ and just happened to stumble upon it.He’s nothing if not an opportunist.

Once he’s gone the real torture will begin while Cadogan works to get the info by any means necessary. Cadogan is a narcissistic sociopath, do you really think he’ll take any risk that Clarke will reach Bellamy? I think they’ll damn near liquify her brain and then she’ll be kept apart from her people so they don’t cause a fuss. (possibly next episode) I think then Levitt will find out how hard they pushed Clarke and when he tells Octavia and she begs him to check on her, he finds Clarke in pretty rough shape. When he tells Octavia and brings Bellamy at her request, taking him away from his tour, she then confronts Bellamy who doesn’t believe her. Then Levitt shows him the footage of Clarke being tortured which she tried to resist by remembering the radio calls as a kind of block for anything outside that purview until they push too hard and she falls unconscious. Bellamy sees her being tortured and the calls and the cracks start to deepen and the indoctrination starts to fail. I know a lot of people want Bellamy there while she’s actually tortured, but I honestly don’t think that kind of betrayal of trust and basic human rights can be forgiven (by Clarke or Bellamy forgiving himself cause he’d despise himself if that did happen) and forgotten in 4-5 episodes to the degree it will need to for them to pass the test and end up together (unless they do a ‘6 years later’ where they’re married and 5 year old sibling for Madi with another on the way, but even then). I also think he’ll stay as a ‘faithful disciple’ even as he’s pulled by both sides internally until he has more info either way and will be there when point 5 below happens.

3.Tied to above: is it safe to hook Clarke up to that thing cause like time I checked, in canon it’s only been a week since Clarke was having seizures and almost died from sharing her brain for too long with Josephine which she was warned would lead to neural degradation then death, so can she actually survive the procedure?

4.I would be so happy if they have Jordan do a ‘Monty Green stopping Bellamy, Gaia and Indra in the fighting pits’ call-back by having Jordan burst in while they’re torturing Clarke with the news that Cadogan the narcissist translated the message wrong...which didn’t end so great for Becca when she presented another option other than leaving Earth. Though honestly, I don’t think it would happen next episode, maybe the one after or at least not expanded upon too much while they’re being watched.

5. I think it’s a possibility that when they do break Clarke, the info they get will be so vague that they’ll be flummoxed by it, but Bellamy will know what it means and his final decision will be made. It will just be Madi’s drawings of Clarke as ‘Wanheda’ and the Anomaly stone, my little Nightblood in Trig, and maybe one of two little things that will mean little to the Bardoans out of context and everything to Bellamy. He’d go straight to the others, maybe grabbing Levitt on the way. The other wont trust him because it’s such an about face but Bellamy will tell them about the torture (which Octavia didn’t tell them about to keep them from getting hurt trying to protect her) reminding them that Clarke was not the last person to have the Flame, that Madi was. Raven tentatively admits that Madi had been drawing pictures from her dreams that Gaia and Clarke might be from the Flame. They need to get to Madi first (and even the dead Flame might have some info) before Cadogan gets a chance to and stop Cadogan from torturing Madi like he’s done to Clarke. It’s eventually agreed that Bellamy will distract Cadogan while Levitt and Gabriel get Clarke and the others steal enough uniforms so they can get to Sanctum with their minds intact.

6.So Levitt stopped reading Octavia’s memories during the City of Light, right? And the Conductor was spouting that the Shephard message of ‘selfless love’? Who wants to bet that Cadogan gets more than a little threatened when he starts seeing not only Clarke in the City of Light itself (Imagine them starting with being tortured by her mind controlled mother, then ‘Her friends are her weakness. Start with Bellamy Blake.’, her mother being controlled to hang herself and Clarke not giving in  and Bellamy and Murphy bursting in and Clarke becoming a temporary Nightblood  and her conversations with Jasper, Becca and ALIE, even if we only see snippets or them mentioning in as an aside to rush it along, it would be heavy hitting under the circumstances), but also the lead-up and aftermath of Praimfaya, and more specifically Clarke’s place in it? The Shephard is revered for ‘saving his people from the fire’, well Bellamy shut the door and took his people to space to save them from Praimfaya while Clarke stayed behind ON THE SURFACE OF THE PLANET in order to align the dish manually to save them. The Shephard conquered the Mountain? Bellamy and Clarke defeated the Mountain who had been kidnapping the Grounder to either use as blood bags or turning them into mindless cannibals, and tortured teenagers to death for their bone marrow even after they said they’d donate it willingly. The Shephard went on a pilgrimage for 3 months with provisions to do the aforementioned conquering of the mountain? Clarke Mother F’ing Griffin survived the 2nd Apocalypse that burnt up 96% of the Earth’s surface and not only did she survive, she managed to find the 4% or at least a large chunk on it and lived there alone with only her adoptive daughter and broken radio for company for 6 YEARS! A lot of Cadogan’s mythos and legend is his own self-aggrandizing and twisting circumstances to fit his narrative of ‘I am the one true Prophet and Saviour who will lead us into the Last War for all Mankind’, Clarke’s is from her own actions, deeds and self-sacrifice.

Because while the Bardoans may are quick to spout out the credence of “the few for the many” how many of them have actually had to back that up? And both Bellamy and Clarke have, on multiple occasions. Remember Clarke and Bellamy’s little chat with Roan before the City of Light? About how ALIE didn’t give a damn what clan you were from, she wanted to get EVERYONE? Octavia knew about it, but Clarke was there when she and Bellamy convinced Roan. And also “Are you really willing to trust that guy with your life?” “No. But you’ll be covering us the entire time, and I trust you.” Not to mention him holding her hand when she got the Flame implanted and him trusting her when she said that taking ALIE’s chip was the right choice.

Huh, the end of season 3 had a heck of Bellarke, didn’t it 😉

7.I think when Cadogan finds out that Clarke has a mind-drive in her head he’s going to be veeery interested in cutting her neck open and becoming the Shephard for all eternity. Am I wrong?

8.I’m calling it now; the final test (given by a manifestation of Becca since she’s connected to all of them and the Anomaly stone) will be between Bellamy and Clarke, Cadogan and Sheidheda. It will be straight forward and/or easy to cheat until there is trick situation where their actions, not their words, show their true beliefs and goals. Maybe showing someone they loved in the past or present (Callie and Reese, whoever Sheidheda may care for, Clarke or Bellamy being trapped and there only being time to save the other or to ‘win’)

[hollyhockash]

The Broken Clock (full quest set)

[a quest set about dealing with the depression associated with enormous guilt, and self-sabotaging in the process] [full Emptiness, Binding, and Shepherd arcs, but see description for significant caveats]

So. The premise of Glitch is that you are a Strategist retired from the Valde Bellum, the Excrucian War, and you're trying to make a life based on something, anything, else. But you were probably fighting said War, once, and if you were, you almost certainly did horrific things. I decided to tear open this subtext and make it text.

Glitch has quest sets, and their broad structure is similar to that in Chuubo's. There are, however, subtle differences in structure. So while you could probably lever a Chuubo's quest set into Glitch or vice versa, I thought it would be worth it to specifically write a set for this particular version of the system.

Also, the entire quest set is going to be in this post, because cutting it apart for posting seems pretty pointless.

The quests go as follows:

The Void Inside (20/35 XP) (Emptiness 1, Bindings 1, Shepherd 5)

The Past Rises (20/35 XP) (Emptiness 2, Bindings 2, Shepherd 2)

It Already Happened (30/45 XP) (Emptiness 3, Bindings 5, Shepherd 1)

Whose Knife Is It Anyway? (35/50 XP) (Emptiness 4, Bindings 3, Shepherd 4)

Instructions For Reassembly (20/30 XP) (Emptiness 5, Bindings 4, Shepherd 3)

Note that this quest set is about depression and self-sabotage/self-harm.

It is probably incredibly obvious that I am writing this from underneath an episode of crippling depression. I think this is a feature, not a bug.

This quest set takes cues from the True Lab sequence in Undertale, and the We Must Be Killers: Tales from District 2 fanfic series by lorata.

Do you know why Replay Value returns again and again to the topic of moral injury, of being forced to break or kill other people in order to survive, and trying to live with that fact? It’s not because of, as I thought at the time, the fact that the morality dimension of combat PTSD is underrepresented in fiction. It’s because -

There is just enough true horror I did that I cannot wholesale dismiss the guilt as brain lies. I was coerced to do these things under circumstances that nobody would consider me culpable, I wasn’t given a choice and was too terrified to disobey, but that doesn’t seem to matter. Even now, knowing full well that I am an adult and can just leave if this is visited upon me again, I am terrified that should someone ask me to do this again, I would buckle and fold.

...So it’s easier for me to think in terms of “terrible people should still be allowed recovery” than “I am not a terrible person.”

Arc Notes

Emptiness

The original, canonical order of the quest set.

The Void Inside - you’re trying to live a normal life and avoid any contact with the things in your past

The Past Rises - evidence piles up that no, this isn’t going to go away

It Already Happened - depression rises and swallows you whole

Whose Knife Is It Anyway? - you fight halfheartedly against some enemies because, unconsciously, you kind of want them to win

Instructions For Reassembly - you try to fix things

The thing about Emptiness is that there’s not really any more “cracking under the strain” that you can even do, anymore; far, far worse has already been visited on you. And so Emptiness 3 instead ends with you remembering something important you’d forgotten, and making a decision on how to deal with it.

Someone once asked what the point of being on a silver arc even is, because it doesn't involve "progressing" or "improving" in any visible fashion. I didn't have an answer then. I have an answer now. Emptiness arcs are the story of how you don't commit suicide. I suspect that the answer could be something less bleak, but right now that's all I have.

Bindings

The Void Inside - you’re struggling with whether you can ever live in normal society again, and it turns out that the answer is “no”

The Past Rises - you stop trying to push away your history, and try to engage with it; it’s terrifying to even face down the shape of things, but you have to know the scope of the problem before you can even try to fix it

Whose Knife Is It Anyway? - you’re being pursued by people who are trying to take revenge, and you think that if you let them succeed, maybe that’ll fix everything. Fortunately or unfortunately, they realize what you’re doing, and give up before you do.

Instructions For Reassembly - you decide that reparations are a thing you are going to have to do yourself, the hard way

It Already Happened - you are hit by the full force and scale of how much you once did, and realize that no amount of work on your part will make everything right

Bindings arcs are at least broadly similar to their Chuubo's counterparts. So there’s not much more for me to say.

Shepherd

It Already Happened - your life is a haze of gray helplessness

The Past Rises - some specific guilt manages to break out from underneath the depression

Instructions For Reassembly - you try to make up for what you’ve broken. You make it up to some people, but not enough.

Whose Knife Is It Anyway? - you put up a halfhearted fight

The Void Inside - you reach a new equilibrium, which is still depressed but at least slightly more functional

This is where the largest divergence from Chuubo’s arcs shows up. Shepherd 3 doesn’t end with you managing to put an old thing to rest. It ends with you nearly fixing things... only for that hope to be snatched away from under you.

The Void Inside (20/35 XP) (Emptiness 1, Bindings 1, Shepherd 5)

You try to be good. You do your best to be polite. You attempt to keep up with your bills and your laundry. And you try not to use your miraculous nature to facilitate this, because your powers only ever make things worse.

You're not an enemy of the world. So you won't do any more enemy-of-the-world things. Keep telling yourself that and it’ll work eventually, right?

...Right?

The Void Inside (35 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

a supernatural event gets in the way of you going to some sort of scheduled appointment

you pass out from exhaustion while trying to do an entirely ordinary thing (like standing in line at the DMV)

you leak your Bane/Curse out onto innocent people

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

tell someone that you don't need help even though you clearly do

drink lukewarm coffee

accidentally superglue yourself to something you were trying to fix

lie down with your face in a pillow

leave a note to someone else on the floor

try to pick up something far too heavy, or unwieldy, for one person to carry (like an enormous basket or a towering pile of books)

take painkillers

The Void Inside (simplified) (20 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

not doing some maintenance task that you kept putting off (cleaning the gutters, getting the car’s oil changed, etc.) leads to an entirely predictable disaster

you leak your Bane/Curse out onto innocent people

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

tell someone that you don't need help even though you clearly do

feed coins into a jammed vending machine

pick burrs/seeds off your clothing

stand in an empty elevator

The Past Rises (25/35 XP) (Emptiness 2, Bindings 2, Shepherd 2)

The remnants of your past intrude upon your life. Memories. Dreams. Glimpses in reflections. Physical reminders, maybe. And everyone can tell that something has gone terribly wrong. But you should be above this. You should be better than this.

They say the girl who had no feet could smile because she was luckier than someone who had no legs. And you keep asking yourself: why can’t you do that?

The Past Rises (35 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

someone shows up at your Sanctuary and forcibly drags you out of it

you panic and delete all the evidence of a problem rather than trying to solve it

one of your Treasures or Arcana visits you without notice, bearing a gift you didn’t ask for

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

try to drink from a glass of water that's already empty

listen to several voicemails and then don’t respond to any of them

are out of lotion, chapstick, or sunscreen

wake up with a piece of paper clutched in your hand

find wood that is too damp to burn

have a nightmare about hurting someone or something you care about

open a package or bag, only for the contents to spill and scatter everywhere

The Past Rises (simplified) (25 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

you are ill with a stomach flu, or a similar transient but extremely unpleasant condition

you open a container and find something completely different than the label said it had, usually something dangerous (i.e. a coffee can turns out to have a scorpion in it)

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

don't realize you're crying until somebody tells you

argue with a hallucination

repeatedly write and scribble out the same exact sentence

have a nightmare about hurting someone or something you care about

open a package or bag, only for the contents to spill and scatter everywhere

It Already Happened (30/45 XP) (Emptiness 3, Bindings 5, Shepherd 1)

You accept it now. You were a horror. You are a horror. The stain will never, ever wash out; the specter of the past crushes you underneath its weight. You wander blank-eyed through life. You can’t even cry anymore: that’s gone, too.

Nobody can save you, because you don’t let them. Because this is what you deserve.

It Already Happened (45 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

someone yells at you, and you accept it silently

you accidentally cut yourself and then stare at the blood welling up

you spend days in bed, too exhausted or depressed to get up

you descend into Infection State while alone

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

burn a candle all the way down to the stub

sit in a silent, dark room

shove a care package into the corner, unopened

run a finger over your scars, or other remnants of old injuries

eat instant noodles dry from the package

wander in a daze

throw something into an already overflowing trash can or dumpster

don't even try to leave for an appointment

It Already Happened (Simplified) (30 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

you visit a waterfall

you stick your hand into something that will obviously hurt you (like a bonfire, dry ice, or some sort of caustic chemical)

you descend into Infection State while alone

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

take pills that someone else presses into your hand, without looking at them or asking what they are

stand at a bus stop or train station, as buses and/or trains pass by without you

stare blankly at a huge stack of something

eat instant noodles dry from the package

suffer insomnia

try to read a book but can’t focus on the words

Whose Knife Is It Anyway? (35/50 XP) (Emptiness 4, Bindings 3, Shepherd 4)

The people you once wronged are here again. They (at least initially) want to beat you up. You, unfortunately, also want to beat yourself up. How long will it be until they, or you, realize that you're just using them as an instrument of self-harm?

Whose Knife Is It Anyway? (50 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

you let a pursuer catch up to you

you don't defend yourself against a crippling strike

you share a poisoned drink

someone who ought to be your enemy shows you unexpected kindness

an ally or friend tracks you down in some alien place and, angrily, asks you: what the hell were you thinking?

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

attack someone who should be on your side

sit with your back pressed up against a locked door

look around a bedroom or hotel room that is unfamiliar to you

are careless with a blade or scissors

receive a bouquet from someone you don't like and/or are afraid of

load and/or sharpen a weapon

hold paper to a flame and watch it burn

use antiseptic that burns and stings on a wound

hold a symbol or representation of your Bane in your hands

Whose Knife Is It Anyway? (simplified) (35 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

a blade is held against your throat

someone removes your heart, or something that could be reasonably defined as your heart, while you can't or don't object

someone who ought to be your enemy shows you unexpected kindness

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

sit with your back pressed up against a locked door

throw something at the wall in frustration

use antiseptic that burns and stings on a wound

sleep somewhere uncomfortable or inconvenient

continue to chew gum that has gone completely flavorless

pour water onto the ground

ignore and walk away from someone you recognize

Instructions For Reassembly (20/35 XP) (Emptiness 5, Bindings 4, Shepherd 3)

You try to fix what you broke. Or, at least, make reparations. It's not going to fix everything. But you do what you can.

Instructions For Reassembly (30 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

you deactivate some sort of security system

a Power visits you and gives you a task to complete

another Chancery member agrees with you that you are a monster, because everyone here is, and it is strangely comforting

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

suddenly find an ordinary thing inexplicably hilarious and start laughing helplessly

contemplate a bottle of medicine

look through a window at flowers outside

take out the trash

rake or sweep debris into a small pile in the corner

take a walk through a neighborhood you’ve never seen before

Instructions For Reassembly (simplified) (20 XP)

Major goals (5 XP each):

you visit someone whose life you saved

another Chancery member agrees with you that you are a monster, because everyone here is, and it is strangely comforting

Quest flavor (1 XP for yourself and 1 XP for the quest each):

bandage yourself

dump ashes into water

eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich

take out the trash

[that-sarcastic-writer]

Secret - Killian Jones/Captain Hook X Reader

Pairing: Killian Jones/Captain Hook X Fem!Reader

Fandom: Once upon a time

WC:2.2k

Warnings: implied sex, implied nudity, minor cursing, very long

Summary: Killian and the reader are in a secret relationship and her friends find out.

A/N: Just an fyi, I’m not that far into ouat. I’m only half way through season 2, But I knew about Killian beforehand, he was the reason I started the show in the first place. And honestly I already love him enough to crave fics about him. I know just enough to write basic stuff with him. None of my Killian imagines will follow a specific can ouat storyline or plot for now, mainly because I don’t know much. I can write pretty much anything. Just not something requires deep knowledge from a specific episode. But if I do get something wrong don’t quote me on it, I’m just trying to have some fun here

A blinding light sneaked its way into your bedroom, making its way pass your blinds as it shined right over your face. Shutting your eyes tightly, you tried to keep yourself asleep but it was too late, you were already awake. You mentally cursed at the fact that you had forgotten to close the blinds the night prior - go figure why.. Sighing deeply, you allowed your eyes to flutter open to look at your open window. You didn't want to move though, there was no way you were going to disturb the sleeping body that was entangled with yours. Knowing perfectly who that body belonged to, you carefully shifted your own body to face the sleeping man beside you. And there he was, Killian Jones in all his glory. He was peacefully sleeping, not at all bothered by the blinding light coming through the window. Poor thing, he must've been left exhausted from the previous night's events. Yeah exhausted alright.. You took this precious time to appreciate the sleeping man beside you. He was laying on his side with one arm securely wrapped around your waist, almost as if he wanted to make sure you were still there, while his other arm was tucked under the pillow. And he was most definitely naked under that blanket.

You brought your hand up to gently run your fingertips over his scruff covered cheek. His raven hair was left a royal mess the night prior, it looked cute even. But more of all he looked calm, peaceful even. You smiled at how peaceful he looked. He usually had a hard time sleeping. You couldn't even begin to imagine how many sleepless nights he's had. But never with you though. He was always so peaceful when he was with you. You appreciated each and every one of his handsome features. You didn't take the time to do such often given that he was always the first one to wake up. You'd wake up to him laying on his good hand or slightly over you, simply watching you sleep. Or he was already up and ready to leave. Sadly, he never stayed too long after your awakening. It wasn't that he didn't want to. Of course not. He'd stay in bed with you all day if he could. It was more of him honoring your wishes. Despite being together for almost a year, nobody in town knew about such relationship. You perfectly knew that your friends would never approve. I mean, they were all perfectly aware of Killian's past, and so were you. Still, you saw so much more than just the awful pirate everyone made him out to be. Keeping your relationship a secret wasn't exactly the best choice to make. Killian obviously didn't agree. He wanted to let everyone know that you were his. And it wasn't that you were completely against it. But you weren't quite sure you could handle your friends' harsh judgment. I mean, they were the closest thing you had to a family, you didn't want them to think less of you because of their ideology of Kilian. So, you decided to keep your relationship a secret until you were completely certain Killian was the one for you.

This time, you were thankful that you had woken up before him. Though that time was cut short as he began to feel the effects of the shinning lights as Killian began to wake up. His ocean blue eyes fluttered open to reveal he was now awake. They were still half closed and tired, but you knew he was awake. A small smile made it's way to his lips as a soft sigh left his lips.

"Morning love," Killian mumbled softly, his voice slightly lower that usual, but still smooth as always. You smiled softly and brought your hand to his cheek again.

"Morning Captain." He smiled slyly, you knew he loved it when you called him captain. He brought his good hand to your cheek as he leaned just a little bit closer, closing the already tiny gap between your bodies. He wasted no time in fully closing said gap and pressing his soft lips against yours.

Though, your moment of bliss was soon cut short by the sound of a loud and continuous knock on what you figured was your front door. Groaning with slight annoyance, Killian pulled back and laid on his back.

"Who on God's earth has the audacity to disrupt our blissful morning?" Killian asked nobody in particular with a roll of his eyes. You giggled softly at his annoyance and leaned over him to kiss his lips. His annoyance didn't last any longer after that.

"I'll go get that." You mumbled against his lips before pulling back. You climbed over him to get out of bed but he whined, grabbing your hip with his good hand and keeping you on his lap. "Killian.." You warned, giving him a look. But he gave you an equally convincing look.

"Come on love, let them wait. I'm sure they will grow tired eventually." He shot you that smirk of his, and damn did you hate the effect it had on you. You had almost forgotten what you were about to get up for. But you were soon reminded by another, slightly louder knock.

"I'm sorry Kil, I have to go get it." You leaned down to press a quick kiss to his lips and climbed off his lap before he could prevent you from doing so again. Despite his audible protests you found your undergarments and a random pair of shorts that were scattered across your bedroom floor. But a shirt was nowhere near sight. You figured the one you had been wearing the day prior was somewhere in your room left to be forgotten and maybe even in the living room. Scanning on the floor you picked the first piece of clothing you could find, Killian's shirt. Shrugging you slipped it on and looked back Killian, who was now sitting up against the headboard of your bed and was looking at you, with that damn smirk of his still on his lips.

"Are you sure you dont want to come back into bed with me, love?" You slightly crunched up your nose and bit your lip in debate. Damn you Killian Jones. But you sighed and shook your head, making your way to your bed.

"Tempting but no. I won't be long." You gave him a quick kiss before jogging out of your room before he could say anything else. Doing of the buttons of the shirt, you stood by the door and quickly opened it to reveal Emma, Mary Margaret and David, all standing by your front door with a frown on their faces. You were confused as to the reason of their visit. But you certainly didn't appreciate the short notice.

"Hey.. what uhm.." You trailed off, looking behind you to make sure Killian hadn't come out of your bedroom before looking back at them, but you didn't step away from the door, hoping they'd realize it wasn't a good time. "What are you guys doing here so early?"

They were all eyeing your choice of attire, clearly it wasn't the most presentable. But more so the shirt you were wearing. It was more than obvious that it wasn't yours. Emma was the one first to speak though. She perfectly knew something was up, with a raised eyebrow she spoke, "You were going to help us get what we need from Neverland. And you were going to ask Hook for help remember? So did you?"

Oh..

That's why you called Killian last night.. You knew he could get you to Neverland since you needed the magical properties of its waters for some sort of spell you knew nothing about. So when Emma asked you for help you knew just who to ask. But coming to think of it, you didn't get the chance to ask Killian about it because the moment he was through your front door, he was all over you, discarding every and all of your pieces of clothing in an instant. And of course, you didn't oppose when he did. And well, needless to say you had no time to ask him for help.

You tried to play off your guilt and knowingness by giving her a clueless look before making an 'oh' sound. As if you had completely forgotten. Which you had, but for a completely different reason. "Oh yes that.. I uhm.. I couldn't get a hold of Killian last night so.." You lied through your teeth, your eyes wandering away from their questioning gazes. You wouldn't doubt that David and Mary Margaret did buy your story, but you perfectly knew Emma saw straight to your lie. Hoping you had convinced them enough to make them leave, you forced a smile. You noticed Emma exchanging an unconvinced look between Mary Margaret and David, making them have the same look of doubt.

Though this time, Mary Margaret was the one to speak, "Well, we still need your help. You've been to Neverland more than we have so." She smiled, slightly shifting on her feet, glancing inside your house. She wasn't lying, you've been to Neverland many times with Killian, you knew about it nearly as much as Killian did. "Is it okay if we come in?"

Your eyes shot a bit wide at the question, and you swallowed thickly with nervousness. You had to say yes, if you didn't, they'd realize you were hiding something. You were hoping Killian didn't decide to come out of you bedroom before you could tell him. Sighing in defeat, you nodded shortly before stepping away from the door allowing the small group inside your house.

You instantly cursed at the fact that some of your clothes were scattered on the floor and over the couch, along with Killian's boots and his leather jacket.

Well there goes that..

Hoping they didn't notice, you turned around to face your friends with a nervous smile. And by the look on their faces, they definitely noticed the discarded pieces of clothes scattered all over your living room.

"Who's jacket is that?" David pointed at Killian's jacket that was laid out on your couch. You held your chin with your hand as you tried to come up with an excuse but realized you had none.

"That.. That's uhm.. Killian's." Nope.. Poor choice of words.

They all looked at you with wide eyes and you instantly regretted the words that had just come out of your mouth.

"Hook's? But didn't you say you didn't see him last night?" Emma chimed in. And at that point, there was nothing that would change the questioning and judging looks on their faces. Still, you hoped you could still salvage the mess you had made and still keep your relationship with Killian a secret. You opened your mouth to mutter out some other excuse but you were instantly cut off by the sound of another voice.

"Love!" You heard Killian shout from your bedroom.

There was no way to salvage anything after that.

You slightly clutched you face between your hand as it became a whole layer of red with embarrassment and you tried to avoid the clearly judging looks coming from your friends. There was nothing you could say to play things off at that point. They hadn't said anything yet, almost as if they were waiting to actually see Killian to then lecture you.

"Y/n love, did you happen to take my shirt again-" Killian's smooth voice rang through room. You hesitantly lifted up your gaze to see a shirtless Killian standing beside you.

Oh lord..

~To be continued~

《So this is the first imagine I post on tumblr. I usually post on wattpad but I feel like here I have more liberty to post about whoever I want. I will post a second part to this, i just had to cut it down because it was getting too long. I haven't written in months so i just couldn't stop with this one. But yeah i hope you enjoyed this and part 2 will be up soon. I’m also still trying to figure out tumblr’s whole posting algorithm so bare with me here》

[twilightknight17]

Forgetting to buy more SP patches before taking on the final boss was probably a mistake.

Forgetting to sell the items I can’t take into NG+ for cash that I can take into NG+ was probably a mistake.

Forgetting to get Arsene out of Lockdown so that I can record his awesome new stats for NG+ was probably a mistake.

In my defense, I was really excited. I wonder if the game will let me make a side trip while I’m out...buying flowers. Because that is what it has come to.

Buying flowers.

Shinya is a terrible brat and wasn’t in Akihabara at ALL until the day before the deadline. Thanks, Shinya. There goes my max confidants. Blugh. At least I got some other things done. Got the award for the maid cafe, so I don’t have to go back except once to open the Twins field trip. I still suck at batting even with third eye. But I am a champ at fishing, it only took me like five trips to the fishing pond to catch the Guardian! I could have done it in less if I’d figured out how to manage my bait properly sooner.

Smile, Akira, we’re awesome! ...still not even halfway to enough fish points for the award, though. :/

I am also awesome at the crane game in Akihabara, and by that I mean I am persistent and have enough yen that it doesn’t matter how many tries it takes.

Ryuji truly knows the way to my heart. <3 I missed two episodes of Featherman; one I forgot to check the TV, and the other I was laughing so hard at the title that I forgot to write it down. But I know where they are, so it’s something else for NG+. ^_^

So I romanced Sumire, and I’m...slightly off-put. Only slightly. Not because of her, but once again, because of the writing. Sumire is cute, but the game is singling her out as “special” again.

She is the only one who confesses to you, and you explicitly have the option to turn her down, rather than the implications of a confession that you can shoot down indirectly (Haru’s, Makoto’s, Futaba’s), or the absolute fucking galaxy-brain leap of logic that is Ann’s dialogue choices. X’D

If you ignore that, though, they’re stupidly cute. Akira’s a little shit, as usual. Sumire asks you to “look at her”, based on her whole confidant thing of realizing that having someone you care about watching you makes you want to do better.

And so Akira looks.

And looks closer.

Dorks. XDDD

They’re sweet. Not my favorite romance route; that still goes to Haru. I think in the end I still prefer Akira adding another member to his army of younger siblings. He’s gotta be better than Yu. XDDD

So I got Kasumi’s rank 10 and literally the next day was February 2nd, and I spent the afternoon getting her third-tier persona. So I didn’t even get to see...Vanadis? in battle. Vanadis matches a little too well to Arsene for my tastes, and Ella is pretty, but I’m not sure how I feel about it looking kind of bride-ish when Maruki’s running around in a wedding tux.

.

Anyway...what do we do the night before the meeting that will decide everything?

We make curry and we pretend everything isn’t about to go to hell.

.

So, Maruki. Let’s chat.

Does no one die in your world? Or move away? What if someone’s dream is to move abroad, and someone else’s dream is for that person to stay with them forever? If what we saw in your Palace is any indication, both of them would be tortured into accepting new dreams where they wouldn’t hurt each other. Dreams that you deemed acceptable. And that’s why you’re wrong.

So you’re giving up your happiness to make sure everyone else is happy? Why can’t you just use your powers to make her remember you, without the trauma? Are you not all-powerful?

Or are you running away from the person that reminds you how helpless you used to be? You’re not moving on, you’re dwelling, and using it as an excuse to be terrible. For all of your kindness, you know Akira is a threat. And benevolent or not, you’re being manipulative. You’re using Goro against him. You’re hoping that he makes the decision you didn’t, and chooses the person he cares about over the reality he wants.

Every time he says something like this, I feel exactly the way he says he didn’t want me to. Newsflash, asshole, that’s exactly what it seems like. If we break your reality, you’re heavily implying he won’t be here afterwards. And you’re gambling that it will be too much pain for Akira to bear, because you know how important they are to each other.

Goro, meanwhile, is both perfectly determined and perfectly stupid.

“Don’t tell me you think dangling my life before us is going to have any impact on our decision.”

Goro. Honey. Do you really think he cares so little that he wouldn’t hesitate for just a moment?

Akira practically throws the calling card at Maruki before he leaves, which I think sums up his feelings pretty well.

I appreciate that Morgana understands that this is something between them.

Goro doesn’t want to be controlled or manipulated ever again. Which... I get it. He’s never had a chance to have full control of his own life. But that doesn’t mean Akira isn’t going to be upset by the idea of him dying. Again.

Two out of three dialogue options are basically “hang on one fucking second,  your life matters to me.”

“Don’t oversimplify this.”

“Oh, but it IS simple. Do you think I’d be happy with this? Being shown mercy now of all times? I don’t want to be pitied-- this isn’t something I’m debating with you! Your indecisiveness is essentially a betrayal of my wishes.”

It’s not pity, you stubborn, idiot boy. ...and I hate that you see it as a betrayal.

Maruki is...very confident. And very kind. And part of the reason he upsets me is because he isn’t wrong, in many cases. But he uses that to justify imposing his will on everyone.

And being kind doesn’t mean that you are free from sin. You can be kind and still be manipulative. And selfish. In the end, that’s what separates him and Akira. Akira, despite all of his hesitation, refuses to be selfish. Even when he has every right to be. He will not hurt someone else to prevent himself from being hurt.

He will not hurt Goro by refusing to fight Maruki, even if it will rip his own heart to pieces.

Oh, I like you. At first glance, the silhouette was very similar to one of Mordred’s original pieces of concept art, though, and I was ready to Yell before I looked closer. XD

And so, at 11:30pm, having completely forgotten the several things I needed to have done before the meeting with Maruki, we head in to steal the Treasure.

This man needs to stop. How dare he know how much I love Cool Stairs?

I find it very concerning that the core of Eden is a writhing mess of tentacles. The metaphorical worm in the apple? X’D We were so close to getting Nyarlathotep, but Azathoth is suitably intimidating. And I appreciate that he’s using the same concepts as the Thieves: his will to rebel against what he sees as an unfair reality, and removing his mask to summon his distorted persona. Thanks for validating all of my headcanon meta about Adachi and Palaces all in one go.

But...

I can’t do this. What the fuck are you wearing?

At least Azathoth is cool.

Somehow I managed to bring exactly the right team to get consistent four-person baton passes for the whole first round. That one was about half an hour.

...the second round was an hour and fifteen minutes because holy shit this thing was a tank and had entirely too many arms and really needed to stop healing.

The torch is very pretty, at least.

And then before we can completely book it out of there, he steals the torch back and literally forces his second awakening so he can keep going. And at that point...what is he even hoping to accomplish? What is he going to do? Are you really willing to kill us to maintain this illusion?

The answer is apparently yes because it was a surprisingly poetic battle as each teammate in turn got a chance to fling themselves in the way and stop it from crushing Joker to death with it’s big giant hand.

And THEN he goes even further and validates some canon meta and me all at once by fusing with his own persona in a continuing last-ditch effort to... I really think he’s trying to kill us. I think he’s that far gone. Or at least his persona is. Because after the fusion, it’s specifically called “Adam Kadmon”, not Maruki. The persona is in control. It’s canon that if you try to summon something stronger than you, it can overtake and possess you. I know Maruki seemed to willingly give up control, but it’s also possible that forcing his second awakening like that left him with a persona that was entirely too strong for him.

(Nevermind that him being that strong in the first place is kind of ridiculous. That’s a discussion for after the final credits. I’m just hyped that someone fusing with their persona was a thing that actually happened!)

He’s so big. Where’s Satanael so I can fuse with him and we can have a megazord fight in Collapsing Ideal Tokyo? XD

The kids up the Holy Shit Quotient by a mile by catching the giant fist all together so that Joker can deal the final blow.

And what a final blow it is.

I really like this, because I don’t know if it was deliberate, but I read it as a callback to Daybreakers. Which came out before the game, iirc, so the first real piece of content. It’s just on a bigger, grander scale.

Everything comes full-circle in the end.

I really like the Mona helicopter. XD I just wish it was a little bigger, because poor Goro squished into the bottom. And poor Akira not managing to make it into the helicopter.

And this asshole WILL NOT STAY DOWN.

What is the point of punching it out on top of the collapsing Palace? Are you trying to kill us both? Do you just want to keep going until neither of us can stand? Dude.

And of course Akira won’t let him die. I think the upsetting thing about this, though, is really that you don’t get the chance to say a proper goodbye to Goro. Or anyone, really, but mostly Goro. The Palace crumbles, Akira wakes up in jail, the Thieves wake up the next morning after fighting all night, and Goro is...gone.

At least the Thieves seem properly sad this time. Even if it’s only for one scene.

Lavenza calls it “ironic” that “your wish for other’s happiness prevailed over your own.” I just call it unfair. Once again, hasn’t he done enough? At least he was only technically in jail for nine days from his perspective, but that must have been a whiplash of an adjustment.

Out of jail, Sojiro acknowledges he was Terrible at the beginning of the year, it’s 2:30am, time to do Valentines and then go to bed before the final walkaround.

And then Valentines passes. I spent it with Sumire. They’re cute.

And then it was February 15th and all the rest of the girls gave me chocolate?? It was just a constant ambush of being given chocolate all day?

And then it was March 3rd, and the Thieves are all splitting up and moving away? Are we sure this isn’t Scramble’s timeline? I get it, narratively, they’re taking the opportunities to move forward that Maruki’s reality would have denied them, but it still hurts.

And then it was March 13th and I still can’t save and now it’s 3am and apparently we get to play out White Day and Sojiro is giving me advice for the perfect date because captain idiot here forgot to plan anything and what heckin’ restaurant is getting this flustered that just mentioning Sojiro’s name is enough to get a table when they’re fully booked and---

Now it’s the 14th and I have to go buy flowers for my dinner date and I have finally been given control and saved and I am free.

Now next time I play I have to see if I can go sell my leftover items, because I’ve got a couple-hundred-thousand yen worth, and also rescue Arsene from prison. X’D

More thoughts on Maruki and everything after I see the ending, most likely.

[lindoig7]

Tuesday-Friday, 25-28 August

Tuesday

We awoke carrying a few aches and pains from yesterday’s exertions, so we relaxed over some very simple killer Sudokus – we finished our previous book yesterday so started a new one today and the first few are VERY simple.

It was still raining on and off – more off than on – so we stayed in the van virtually all day.  We sorted and edited photos and wrote for our blogs all morning and watched a movie in the afternoon – Legends of the Fall.  It was quite good, if a little depressing.

After I cooked a more than acceptable steak and added it to Heather’s veges brilliantly cooked inside, we ate dinner and then played dominos while waiting for the HWS to heat enough water to do the dishes.  We usually turn the HWS off during the day to save gas (and the noise the heater makes) and had forgotten to turn it back on in the late afternoon.

We then started a new series of DVDs – just the first episode of True Detective. It is too early to tell if we will like it, but it is set in the US.  For some reason, I thought it was set in the UK when we bought the series a couple of weeks ago.

Wednesday

We were still a bit fragile this morning so had another easy morning in the van. We had intended doing the laundry, but opted instead for a quiet morning catching up on a few items of business, looking at photos and relaxing.  It was mostly sunny but still felt cold so we ran our heater almost all day again.

During the afternoon, we went for a pleasant drive before hitting the supermarket and booze shop again.  We mostly shop at Woolies, but I needed beer and have become quite partial to a cheapie made specifically for Liquorland.  It is called Steamrail Pale Ale and given my penchant for the romance, noise and smells of steam trains (and the fact that I drove one about 30 km as an 11- or 12-year-old kid), it seems appropriate to add the taste of Steam(rail) to my list of pleasures. We shopped at Coles, but they didn’t have everything we wanted and Liquorland didn’t have Heather’s favourite cider, so we finished the groceries at Woolies and the booze at BWS after all.

Our drive was originally planned for Noojee, but we saw a turnoff to the Tarago Reservoir and detoured to that.  It was a delightful drive, especially the last couple of clicks to the reservoir itself – big trees, winding track through pastures, quaint farms and outbuildings – very cute.  We had a short walk around the sprawling picnic area (where all forms of picnics or social gatherings are absolutely forbidden) but access to the dam and its water is securely fenced off. Instead of returning to the main road and Noojee, we continued on the Tarago road through picturesque Jindivik and meandered via lesser roads back to Warragul.

Thursday

It looks like being fine most of today, but with a wickedly wild, wild wind.  It is howling around, rattling the whole caravan and battering the awning even though it is in the lee of the van.  A great day to get the washing dry and it was definitely laundry day for us – but Heather used the dryer in the laundry and everything was dry in the time it would have taken to peg things on the line (and retrieve the things that would inevitably have blown away!).

I had a few little maintenance things to do, including trying to secure the awning a little more rigidly. As I said, the wind has been quite ferocious here today, particularly in the afternoon, and the whole caravan is constantly buffeted and bombarded with the shriek of the wind and the crashing of the awning.

We went out for a walk in the afternoon, just a kilometre or two around the circuit behind the van, but it was quite hard work heading into the teeth of the gale.  It is a few days since we did the loop out there and it is amazing how much difference such a short time makes.  There are many more flowers out (mainly our beloved Flinder-bells, aka onion weed) but so many trees and shrubs are now in bud, the willows are covered with long trailing green ribbons, all looking very lacy and delicate, and even the scrawny little stick just outside the van is developing its mantle of beautiful white blossom.  We hadn’t noticed any of this before, but it seemed quite obvious today that the season is definitely changing – even if the weather still shows little hint if spring (other than its traditional winds).

It is getting very hard to post anything to my blog at present.  The Wi-Fi in the park is very weak and frustrating.  I can get very slow access most days until about lunchtime, but still with lots of delays and drop-outs.  After lunch, I can never access it at all.  I managed to post a few things today by transferring some text and photos from my PC to a Sandisk USB stick, then using Bluetooth to drop that into my iPad Camera Roll, and composing and posting that to my blog using my tethered iPhone as a hotspot.  It’s a slow and laborious process with too many steps and stages where I can get things wrong.  The Tumblr app is by no means intuitive – and is a bit different on either my iPhone or iPad – so the whole process is fraught!  I will just have to keep persevering – or get up early enough to post things from my PC in the morning.

We went down to the ablution block for our showers just before 5 pm with some mountainous livid clouds threatening – and it is a good job we never left it any later.  Heather got back in time, but I had gone down a few minutes after her and had to jog back to the van in the first of some sprinkles foreboding a very heavy downpour that hit just as I reached the awning.  Another 30 seconds and I would have had two showers for the day.

Within an hour, all Hell broke loose.  The wind went absolutely wild.  It shrieked through the adjacent trees and the awning on the van next to us was reduced to a twisted pile of scrap within minutes.  Ours disconnected from its struts a couple of times but we went out quickly and rescued it before any damage occurred.  We could hardly hear each other for the noise, and the poor screeching Corellas and Galahs in the trees were being blown off their perches. The rain bucketed down and the lights flickered on and off for several minutes. If any of the trees behind the van had fallen our way, the van would have been completely crushed.  Fortunately, the prevailing winds all pass our van on their way to the trees.  It was all very exciting, if more than a little disconcerting.  It rained/poured on and off until about midnight or a bit after, but the wind kept lashing the van until about 5 am.  Next morning there were numerous branches down around the park, but the extent of the damage elsewhere became obvious during our excursion later in the day.

I have experienced some amazing winds in caravans.  I recall many (many) years ago, I was in an onsite van in Busselton (Western Australia) which is not so far from the Cape Leeuwin weather station and we heard that the anemometer wound off its stanchion at about 190 kph.  We awoke to 20 cm of water throughout the park, but being so sandy, it was all gone within a couple of hours.  Much more recently, we were at Camperdown in our previous little van and it was so wild that I had to park the car across the van to shield it from the worst of it as well as chocking the wheels and tying it down.  And at Tibooburra a few years ago, we were the only van in the park and drove out to Cameron Corner for the day without any inkling of an impending storm – but came back in the afternoon to find all the components of the awning distributed around the park.  Fortunately, nothing was broken and we were able to reconstruct it well enough to continue on our way.  We sat out a wild cyclone in the Kuril Islands a few years ago and Heather drew attention to another exciting storm event the first time we approached Inexpressible Island in Antarctica (NEITHER of these were in our caravan) but I still think Thursday’s little puff was about as violent as I can remember – perhaps because we were so close to the trees and the cacophony they generated.

Despite the drama of the storm, Heather made the most wonderful meal using our new double-sided frying pan/mini-oven.  We had bought a boned leg of lamb and she marinated it for almost a day with a great concoction of herbs and spices (in lots of yoghurt).  Cooking it in the pan with lots of chopped onion resulted in the most amazing rich, caramellised, delicious feast you could imagine.  It really was fantastic and we have enjoyed the leftovers in 3 meals since.  Superb!!!

Friday

A really great day today.  We headed south to the coast, but you should have seen the trees on the way that had been brought down overnight.  We saw maybe 20 or so giants and hundreds of smaller trees as well as thousands of branches, twigs and metres of bark stripped from the vegetation. We had to drive around dozens of branches and small trees on the road, but the really big ones blocking the whole road were already being removed.  Council and SES crews were hard at work, along with local farmers who were cutting up the logs and repairing broken fences and other damage.  I don’t suppose this was hugely unusual for them, but for (sort of) city slickers to see so many mammoth trees that had been guarding the road for centuries laying on the ground with their roots splayed to the heavens was pretty amazing.  It reminded us how lucky we were not to have been in the way of the giants that could have demolished our caravan had we been in the path of one.

We went down through Korumburra and Leongatha to Tarwin South and hence to Tarwin Meadows – only to find that it was private property and we almost ended up in their front yard.  We back-tracked and followed a lovely quiet road to the Cape Liptrap Lighthouse.  It was a wonderful short walk to the light-tower itself and we enjoyed some magnificent views and saw some lovely little birds (and some quite a bit bigger). The coast was still pretty wild after the storm but we kept ourselves safe, well away from the fury, at the top of the cliffs.  We had a bit of fun playing the calls of the Brown Thornbills on our birding app.  There were quite a few around and several came out to say good mornig to us as well.  Don’t usually do this, but we were trying to confirm their identity using the app and next moment they were reacting with us.

We followed the coast as close as we could and ate our lunch at Walkerville North whilst watching the sea-birds (and a dog harassing them) before going on to Waratah Bay.  We walked along the beach and saw millions of tiny sand-balls created by the little crabs that had burrowed down while the tide was out.  There were quite a few pretty shells, all broken, and hundreds of small smooth stones of almost every colour and pattern.  The beach was very flat and very wide, at least 150 metres wide I reckon, but the tide was coming in and although we watched it for a while, I guess the entire beach would have been reclaimed by King Neptune within half an hour or so.

We tried to get to Shallow Inlet but were again thwarted by the National Park closure.  We had tried to get in from the east a week or so ago without success and coming from the west didn’t make it any more doable.  It simply doesn’t make sense to close so many parks and reserves because of Covid.  Every National and State park is locked up for no conceivable reason.  They would be the safest places around!  Sure, Melbourne people aren’t allowed to travel, but there is much more freedom throughout the rest of the State but government/s have chosen to punish the rest of the country despite there being absolutely zero risk.  Many of the rules are simply moronic.  There is no possible policy reason for them and the only other interpretation I can put on this stupidity is that the rules are set with only vindictiveness in mind.

We were able to go to nearby Sandy Point - and when we reached the end of the road, we simply drove straight onto the beach. We weren’t the only car on the beach and it was obvious from the many tyre tracks that driving on the beach was normal.  We drove half a kilometre or so along to where there was a sign indicating that driving beyond that point was not allowed, but it was a bit of fun and enabled up to get some good views of the shore-birds.  We saw about 15 Eastern Curlews – not that common in our experience – and a couple of hundred Red-capped Plovers – a lot more than all I have seen in my lifetime.  It was a great opportunity for a few photos and a bit of a novelty to drive on the hard-packed sand.  The whole area was wonderfully quiet and peaceful and quite beautiful!

We dilly-dallied there for a while and then drove home via Meeniyan, Mirboo North and Trafalgar with the last leg in particular being through really beautiful country.

[baconpal]

here i go talkin bout fuckig anime again

rant time, but like a good one where i’m happy about things instead of angry

so ima talk about and recommend some anime shit, specifically  comfy anime and gurren lagann

i’ll just start it by saying what i mean by comfy anime, cus its something that is more vague than it should be for most people, but for me it’s pretty much anime that i wouldn’t want to binge all together, and instead watch an episode or two when i want to just enjoy something. The kind of show where after watching a little you become really confident that every single episode is just gonna be good, and you can just enjoy forgetting everything and watching it for just a moment of time. 

The anime I consider comfy and also like the most are: 

Girls Last Tour, which i’ve talked about a lot already and i will do it more if you give me an excuse, still one of the best things out there, go watch it fuck you, but that was really good as a once a week thing to wind down my week when it aired.

Non Non Biyori, which is a pretty classic example of just a really slow paced show about a slow paced kind of life. It’s about the best example of slice of life since it’s not trying to be anything else. It’s not comedy or romance or a hobbyist show or anything at all but moments in life, and it’s very relaxing.

And lastly, the comfy anime that made me wanna start ranting in the first place, Yama no Susume. I’m gonna go and talk about it for a while now, but I’ll just give it a general recommendation to whoever cares. The episodes are all short so watch a little and decide if you like it, cus if you like the beginning even a bit, you’ll likely love seasons 2 and 3.

I found this show when my brain thought “anything with a sequel must have at least been good enough to warrant more”, and I looked at the currently airing anime that was a sequel of something and went and watched the first seasons instead, despite coming to enjoy Yama no Susume, I also found that watching things just because they have sequels is a pretty bad idea, cus most of it fucking sucked.

Regardless, I saw season 3 was airing exactly 1 year ago, and began watching the first season, which really shouldn’t have taken long, because it was a short series, coming in at maybe 40 minutes of actual episodes for the entire first season, even still, I watched it over the course of a month, and really enjoyed having such incredibly small amounts of nice content to just have ready whenever. The second and third season are still shorter than most, with 13 minute episodes over regular anime lengths, and also encouraged a slow consumption of just a little bit whenever I felt like watching. It’s been a clean year since season 3 aired and I’ve only now finished the series, despite being fully engrossed the entire time I was watching. I guess talking about the anime is probably a good idea, so here’s the gist:

THE GIST

Yama no susume is a hobbyist anime about mountain climbing. I don’t climb mountains and I don’t use any part of my body besides my arms and my penis so I don’t have much investment in the subject, but it was still very easy to enjoy the show because the premise set up the studio with the chance to produce countless beautiful scenic shots, which is usually the strength of hobbyist shows, one specific thing the artists want to draw really really well. Yama no susume also has a strong story it wishes to tell on top of an easily enjoyable premise and format.

Like most good hobbyist shows, the main character, Aoi, starts of without any interest in the subject, and seems to have a void in her life, in her case, absolutely nothing going on in her life, at all, besides casual knitting. It took a bit for it to sink of for myself, but I had become very attached to Aoi because she mirrored very similarly my own life going into high school, no friends I really felt like i cared about or cared about me, and only a passing interest in some stuff I wasn’t too invested in. The entirety of the show explores how a friend entering Aoi’s life and giving her a hobby to be invested in and meet more people through improves her outlook on life and helps her grow as a person in pretty much every possible way. 

THE NOT GIST (THE ACTUAL STORY)

The first season, being so short, really only features Aoi and her forgotten friend Hinata climbing two mountains total, both of which are pretty much just light hiking that most people have probably done once or twice themselves, and meeting two people in their town with more interest in the hobby.

I’ll also just awkwardly sandwich this here, in between season 1 and 2 is a very short ova where they climb a rock wall with their new friends, but its not anyway near as well animated or interesting as anything else in the series and also has an extensive sauna scene that, again, doesn’t really fit with anything in the series, so if you read this extensive review before deciding you wanted to watch the series, feel free to skip that one i guess.

The second season is where a lot of the show really is, and most of the show being 24 of the 39 episodes, as well as including a nice short film that’s pretty much just 2 more episodes afterwards. With the new, longer, but still short episode time, a lot more mountains get climbed, as well as some actual stuff goin on. After climbing a few mountains, Aoi decides she wants to climb Mt. Fuji, the fuckin big boy, and the 4 ladies go and do that together, when the show pulls out the first of it’s comfy tricks;

the main character does not succeed at their goal they had set and worked towards, and it results in an uncomfortable situation for the rest of the cast. Aoi is unable to handle such a difficult climb, and her friends complete the climb without her, and it pretty much destroys her for a good amount of episodes. Despite definitely being a comfy show, there are a few stretches of episodes in which things are not going well for the cast, and the slow paced scenery viewing takes on a more comber, pensive purpose. After failing at her hobby for the first time, Aoi falls pretty hard back into her original disinterested state of being, and it seems like a lot of her character falls apart. It takes the intervention of Hinata again to reinvigorate her by taking her to the first mountain they climbed, showing Aoi that she has still grown a lot, and that she will improve more with time.

From that point till the end of season 2 (including the movie) the driving idea of the show becomes memories, and how the vague and heart-shaking feeling of nostalgia can be helpful in unpleasant times. The two main girls recall things that occurred when they were childhood friends, like times they were scarred and depended on each other, or a camping trip they took when they were children, and use those memories to fuel further bonding and growth. Even the two secondary girls use memories to reconnect with their friends and families, and it’s a very strong concept to roll with for the slow, one step at a time type of show it is. The season ends with all 4 girls better than ever, and flexing their friendship muscle by making friends with a stubbornly shy mountain climber that parallels Aoi’s original state, and shows her new understanding that having a friend that shares your hobby will always lead to both of your lives being better.

While the first episode is almost entirely about Aoi and Hinata being friends, the second season continues to introduce more characters that Aoi interacts with as she grows more socially capable, with her even getting a job to support her hobby. This shift away from the relationship between the two girls is then made into a proper topic in the third season, where Aoi is pushed to gain even more friends and do things completely separate from Hinata and mountain climbing. This is when the other comfy trick comes out;

The secondary protagonist, Hinata, becomes upset that the Aoi has grown to have more friends and be less dependent on Hinata, and begins to make poor decisions that further put strain on their relationship over most of the season. 

“wow two characters misunderstand each other and it creates drama!!!” isn’t exactly a mind blowing thing for an anime to do, but whenever any problems came up in the first two seasons, they were handled fairly quickly, rarely ever lasting more than one episode, and usually handled with pretty open, mature conversations that you would expect two friends to actually have instead of just being pissed at each other for a few weeks. So when Hinata does not make any attempt to be open about her feelings, and Aoi is unable to grasp the situation, it creates a justified stretch of drama. I really do mean it when i say most of the season is about this, like pretty much from episode 3 till 12 it’s just a constantly building frustration with a lot behind it, and when they finally can have a simple, honest conversation, it really feels nice.

After that there’s one final episode with a more expected case of the two not understanding one another, and having an honest conversation about it. This specific case is a good capstone to the series, as they discuss how you really don’t know much about even your best friends, but talking about each other honestly, and desiring to know more about each other is where a lot of the fun in friends is. 

With that, the series is done for now, but who knows where it’ll go from here. I heard a lot of good about season 3 as it was coming out, and still see a good amount of support for it, and season 3 ends with “See you again” as opposed to “The end” like the other two season. I’m not gonna get my hopes up cus there’s already a lot there and they explore 3 very important ideals that really resonate with me. But if they could make a fourth season that brings in an entirely knew concept to look at, I’d be really happy. 

Anyway if you read all that and still haven’t decided then just go fucking watch some Yama no Susume, see if i care.

THE GURREN LAGANN PART

Ye how about a complete tonal shift from comfy anime to loud action stuff?

SO i saw Promare finally after missing a bunch of chances to see it, and honestly I don’t have all that much to say about it. Despite being 2 hours it felt really short and like I got no time with the characters, and they were all pretty shallow characters that I didn’t really have any attachment to even on a surface level. Near the end there’s a big drill and a mech with a face on its chest with absolutely no reason or explanation, and because of that I came out of the theater really just thinking “i really want to rewatch gurren lagann” instead of caring that much about promare.

Now I’m rewatching it for probably the 8th time and it really impresses me how much more I like it each time. When i was a stupid baby and watched it for the first time i did what a lot of stupid kids did, watched for a while, really liked kamina, and stopped watching when the he was gone. Obviously I’ve watched it fully many times since then, and while younger me probably would have loved the second half, where simon fills the role kamina did, the me of today really doesn’t care for the second half that much, and I find myself watching just the first half of the show and stopping, or watching the second movie instead of the tv version. The first half of the series is just really strong to me, so I’m just gonna talk about that a little bit and then go to bed I guess.

The art and sound is so fucking good in gurren lagann holy shit. Everything is so springy and malleable, and the mechs are just really big people who are equally malleable and expressive. The characters are all unique and fun, even random background characters in the villages are strong. The use of that very specific light green color that spiral energy has begins with this show, and trigger would forever try and fail to use it as well as gurren lagann did, though LWA uses it pretty well. Every little thing feels so right that I’m just amazed the show keeps up such quality for the whole first half...

EXCEPT THAT ONE EPISODE WHERE IT FUCKING DOESN’T

Along with always assuming gurren lagann isn’t as good as I remember, I also somehow manage to forgot how absolutely miserable the fourth episode is. Not to say that i forget it’s bad at all, i couldn’t forget that episode 4 sticks out as a really not good episode and bring it up as a weird point of contention for the series, but watching it again it’s really baffling how awful it is.

The visuals just fall apart, the shots are lazy and don’t read well, the animation is choppy and unpleasant, the characters look really stupid, and the newly introduced characters never get any proper cuts to introduce themselves with and make a good impression. The voice actors also don’t seem quite as into it as with the other episodes, presumably because they had to watch episode 4 while voicing it, and couldn’t feel the same energy the rest of the show has. 

I can really only assume it was an outsourced episode or something to that effect, and near the end, when gurren laganns absolutely kino combination cuts that would be reused for the next few episodes are first shown, it becomes even more jarring how bad the fight afterwards looks, and how bad the episode is in general. It’s a shame that such a good show has to have such a sudden and massive drop in quality, but it’s interesting in it’s own way.

KAMINA THOUGH

While i did say i’m not as into the kind of character simon becomes in the second half, kamina himself is still undeniably a strong character, and I always appreciate how dopey and unmanly his face is despite being the embodiment of excessive fighting spirit, rash thinking, and unapologetic horniness.

Another strong kamina related thing that always hits me right in the feels is the episode titles, which for the first 8 episodes, are all lines that Simon hears kamina say at some point, which comes is used as a really strong twist, when in episode 8, kamina’s last words are used as the episode title, and not presented as the title until the viewer already knows the meaning of those last few words. From there the episode titles become things Nia says until episode 15 where simon is finally able to step up to his destiny and say his own damn episode title, but Kamina really does get the most out of such a simple concept.

Related to Kamina, I really enjoy how the very very first part of the show sets up episode 8′s strength even more. Besides being a really weird segment where simons voice and design are kind of off and dai gurren’s design isn’t quite finished and also boota is a dude, it sets up the concept of “The man who has yet to realize his own destiny” before introducing simon. The show doesn’t do anything to hide the fact that this “man” is simon, but also never clearly states it, so it’s not hard to understand people who gravitated towards kamina more and assumed that kamina would have a great destiny. Many episodes began or ended with a statement from the narrator saying that “the man” still was not aware of his own destiny, until episode 8, where the narrator claims  “Now the man will realize his destiny”, and before the episode is over, Kamina is gone, and without every stating it, the identity of “the man” becomes clear in a rather brutal process of elimination. Another minor aspect to how gurren lagann builds itself up so well.

Only other thing i really have to say about it is I still really appreciate stories where the protagonist steals things from the villains to grow stronger, or just generally makes use of things his enemies used, creating their own style out of disparate pieces. I hope to make a strong case for that kind of stuff when I can finish more of my comic. Read my comic.

And, as always, if you read all this shit you’re cool and we can be friends. We won’t be, but we could be, and that’s nice to think about sometimes. Have a wonderful night.

[cravitus426]

Greetenings!

Today we have a headcanon ramble, and also a couple redrawn canon elites from the Alexovich Concepts!

Some time it has been since the last krevrant, and while I still haven’t done big Irken biology headcanon rant, I’ve been playing around with Elite designs as of late! Thus, I figured what better time to ramble about a military force such as them - one that we both know less of and more of than we do of the actual Irken Armada, in fact!

So what, exactly, is an Irken Elite?

Well that’s the funny thing - it seems self explanatory, like how Almighty Tallests are the tallest people and are the almighty rulers, or how Invaders invade,or Frylords lord over fast food establishments. So, by that logic, the Irken Elite are, well, elite.

What exactly is that supposed to mean? The better question would be, ‘What do we know about the Irken Elite?’

Well, we know a few things, and in particular things around the Elite.

1. To join the Irken Elite, you must pass a trial.

In other words, you have to take a test. ‘But krev,’ you say, ‘That’s nothing new!’

You would be right, flesh-creature, but in particular the Irken Elite trials seem to at the very least have a seventy year wait period before it can be retaken as seen in Tak’s episode, aside from being held on a military fortress world.

As a side note, Devastis is in fact a legitimate example of Irken architecture and fortifications that aren’t pink or red or deeply purple in color.

Granted, this is kind of debatable given that Zim fragged over half the planet’s power grid and caused mass chaos, but I doubt that would stall all Elite recruitment for that long - this is either a standard ‘fail, wait, and retry’ period where you can improve your skills akin to real world militaries, or it could in fact be the actual timespan between times that Elites open recruitment.

Thus, we reach my first headcanon - the Irken Elite trials are, when there are no horrendous casualties or other shortages of personnel - held every few decades, giving plenty of time for a new generation of soldiers to arise and for the washouts from last gen to brush up and succeed.

So, what else do we know?

2. The Irken Elite are the ranks from which Invaders are often selected.

More from the Tak episode, as well as implications from things such as The Nightmare Begins, wherein Invaders are stated to be, effectively the best. Given how much Tak wanted to be an Elite and how they said that one day they could even become an Invader, it seems like a pretty clear line of progression.

From any walk of life you undergo the Elite trials; should you succeed, you prove that you’re among the best. Should you be the best of the best (or at the very least conveniently the best at sneaking and espionage), you become an Invader.

Now, this isn’t to necessarily say that Invaders are more elite than the Elite, but at the same time given that you are deploying an agent alone into no mere enemy lines, but the heart of their homeworld to effectively conquer it, it probably helps to have been an Irken Elite beforehand.

Regardless, point is, you level up to Elite, then you kind of side-level to Invader.

This brings us to the second real headcanon - the idea that you are not promoted into the Irken Elite, and that in theory anyone from any walk of life - scientist, servant, soldier, or actor - can become an Elite should they succeed in the trials.

Also implied - Invaders may or may not actually be the best of the best, and instead may just be the best suited from the Irken Elite for infiltration.

Anyway, onto the next one! This one may surprise you - or it might not, I dunno. We’re getting into interpretation territory here, which leans more to headcanon.

What do I mean by that? Why do I think this’ll surprise you?

3. The Irken Elite are equipped with personal power armor.

Because, quite bluntly, I think people get Elite gear wrong. I’ve seen their boots treated as big shoes with glowing bits, their pauldrons treated as just plain old cloth gubbins, their little tubed chestpiece forgotten, and their gauntlets in particular treated as spherical boxes worn over the whole forearm with three little holes for their fingers.

It feels as if people aren’t thinking about what these could be, and it does do me an anger because I feel like I’ve figured out the design.

Look at the claws on the first, third, and fifth elites (13, 15, and 17) - note how, aside from being way more well defined and sharp-looking than normal gloved Irken fingers, there is a gauntlet with the fingers missing.

Or, more fittingly, retracted. Those are mechanical fingers, and I’d bet on it! They look nothing like normal Irken fingers, and the Irkens here are too small to have the big spindly fingers of the Tallest despite having similar gauntlets.

Think back to the Hobo 13 episode - remember Zim’s big powerfists and overall power armor, and recall how he absolutely yeeted the instructor!

This technology exists in similar forms used by other alien races as part of training equipment - Irkens would absolutely jump on the opportunity to supercharge metal claws, and if anybody would get them it’d be the Elite.

Canon precedent for power armor that looks very similar aside, it’d explain what those tubes coming from the PAK are - they’re likely power cables, and aside from this giving me an excuse to call the gauntlets something way cooler like powerclaw, the idea that these are mechanical also opens the door up to things like jetboots, minigun hands, and other crazy things!

Plus, I mean, if you want to bring Peridot and Steven Universe into things, well

they’re basically limb enhancers and you have to admit that’s a pretty clear and logical parallel

Anyway, third obligatory formal headcanon - aside from thinking that Elites have power armor, which they probably do - is that Elites are offered some of the best tech around, and have the opportunity to perfectly customize and personalize equipment to their specific liking and skill set.

That aside, we now basically run out of canon information about the Irken Elite!

So, in summary, the Irken Elite are:

1. Selected every few decades through mass testing

1b. Implication that they are the best of the best overall given that testing doesn’t seem inherently restricted to ranks or existing military service; supported by 2.

2. The group from which Invaders are selected

3. Armed with advanced personal armor

Now that that’s out of the way, what of actual denser krev headcanon?

When it comes to the way I think about the Elite, I generally equate them to the Spectres from Mass Effect - specially selected, special equipment, special skills, and special freedoms to do their jobs.

Given the infrequency of recruitment aside from what i can only presume is emergency ‘we’re going through soldiers like free nachos’ measures, as well as how each one is branded and literally called an Irken Elite on top of all the neat toys they get, the point of big gaps in trials is likely both to give time for the best of the best to thin out through attrition, be it death or retirement.

By only recruiting once every half generation or so (outside of emergency ‘going through troops like free nachos’ scenarios), this allows the best of a generation to be evaluated, compared, and contrasted at one time. This ensures that only the best of the best get in, and it also ensures that the ranks don’t bloat through constant recruitment.

Bloating the ranks would likely reduce the allure of the Irken Elite considerably, as Elite usually implies that you are the cream of the crop. Arming an entire army of Elites would also likely be obscenely expensive, not to mention how tedious it would be to track every individual properly - if everyone’s roaming around and selecting their own missions, then you just have roaming warbands and no concentrated campaigns, no Irken Armada to power through the galaxy.

Thus, recruiting in one go and waiting for the numbers to thin out keeps you from having too many expensively well-armed independents running around, as well as ensures that you get the absolute peak of years of training and combat.

As such, an Elite is basically expected to be prepared for any situation and to possess general skills in every category.

For an active Irken Elite, a number of classifications exist indicating things such as your specialty, freedoms, and general qualification level. A squad of lower level Elites, for example, may operate as a more traditional military unit and choose to deploy to campaigns as yet another pawn for generals and admirals to use in their pursuit of total Irken conquest.

A higher level Elite, however, typically an officer, may be trusted enough by the Control Brains to effectively go off and do their own thing, and in some cases successful deep recon, research, and infiltration missions have been conducted by freelancing Elites and their hand-picked crews.

In other words, basic elites can choose their missions but still have to act as part of a squad. Meanwhile, the better of an Elite you are, the more willing the Control Brains are to let you go and do Mass Effect, building a merry band of misfit-loyalists and plundering pirate bases to fuel your need for bigger, better guns.

Just remember to come back when the Control Brains yell at you to, otherwise you’ll get erased from the history books and hunted down for treason!

As far as equipment goes, while there is a general standard template for Elites, usually including powerclaws, powerboots, and some form of chestplate that acts as the core of armor functions, there can be a fair degree of variety.

Overall, what does this mean? Well, it means that Irken Elites are well-armed, well-armored, well-trained, highly skilled, independent and are not in fact just wearing tin cans for gloves!

there’s probably more here but I’m hungry and it’s almost time for lunch

[xxscarletxrosexx]

Miraculous: The Lost Memoirs- Ch. 2 When Tomorrow Comes

Finally updated after 4 years.

Fanfic | Deviantart

A/N:

Yes, I'm alive! It has been 4 ridiculous years since I last updated this story. First and foremost, I apologize for being gone for so long. I truly have to thank Miraculous Ladybug Season 3 for being the catalyst to bring back my love for writing again. I have been looking through a number of Instagram feeds regarding Miraculous Ladybug, and suddenly it just came back. I HAD to write, and I'm here. But it's not just Miraculous Ladybug… I have you to thank. I have not been able to read the sweet comments all of you guys have left me when I have been away via Tumblr, Fanfic, and DeviantArt. Let's just say that I had some growing up to do. And I found the time and the passion to come back. So thank you, everyone.

On another note, when I first wrote this story, I remember that this was back in season 1 when the valentine's episode had just recently come out. Yes, this story is roughly as old as that episode. I had limited information on characterization and interaction, limited to resources on how to write this story, but I had so much freedom to write the story back then. With the ongoing season 3 taking place, I've decided to do my best and try to capture as much canon scenes as possible and adapt into this story, that being said, the outline that I left myself will be scrapped (and may be portrayed as an AU one-shot to this story if anyone is interested).

That being said, thank you to everyone who has followed me and this story, and favorited me and this story. I will be working hard to complete this story. My drive for writing this is very strong. I will talk to you soon! Thank you all from the bottom of my heart to the people who have been reading this from the beginning to the new readers who came to read in between the year of my absence. Thank you so, so, so much<3

I'll write to you guys very soon :)

There are some Easter Eggs that you fans will notice. I was inspired by a post on Instagram. If you don't notice it, feel free to read below for the answers ;)

DeviantArt: XxScarletxRosexX Tumblr: XxScarletxRosexX Instagram: XxScarlyliciousxX

Summary:

It is far from coincidences that these miraculous jewels ended in Marinette's and Adrien's possession. Their kwamis claim that they have been specifically chosen as the sole protectors against evil. But when an akuma returns a forgotten past, it unravels an unforeseen destiny of their Miraculous predecessors' lives. Their decisions, from this moment forward, could possibly alter the true meaning of their existences and their destinies.

When tomorrow comes… I'll be on my own… feeling frightened of the things that I don't know… When tomorrow comes… Tomorrow comes… Tomorrow… Comes…

~~~~~~~

I'll be all alone.

How long had she been sleeping? she wondered.

She wasn't sure how many days have passed nor if her eyes had ever closed. All she remembered was darkness.

Her body was a heavy lead, and to lift as much as a finger sapped all her energy. Her father had been checking up on her every hour or so, leaving her meals in silver dome trays beside the trap door for her to consume, but Marinette would never have the energy to eat, nor make an effort for that matter. Instead, she would force her arms to move her hands and grip onto the sheets of her bed to reposition and drag her to the edge of her bed to take a glimpse at the silver tray before plopping her head against her crumpled sheets in defeat.

During these moments, Tikki's voice would chastise her to take care of herself and not to disrespect her father's efforts. Hearing her voice was enough for Marinette to muster what's left of her strength and stand up from her bed, followed by dragging her feet across the floor and trudging down her stairs. She would drag her legs as if she were dragging a heavy cart until she finally stood in front of the silver tray, and plopped herself on the ground with a loud thud. She would open the tray and eat her luke-warm meal in silence. But today, she felt like staying in bed for a while longer.

The depressed child had not seen her father for days, but she acknowledged his presence with the creaking of the trap door. Guilt had nestled a place at the pit of her stomach, throbbing reminders of the many delicious meals she had wasted of her father's skills; of how much trouble she was causing her father and friends; and most of all, of failing her duties as Ladybug and protecting Tikki. The sensation was an alarm clock with a message repeating like a broken record in her mind, but it had played so many times that she had grown numb to it.

There was no point.

The sound of her creaking trap door meets her ears like a crack of thunder, and Marinette was well aware that she had this chance to talk to her father. All she needed to do was lift her head and call out, "Dad!" But, she couldn't.

She heard him sigh. It was thick with concern but tapered off with an undeniable sense of disappointment, and the feeling had brought tears to her eyes again. She couldn't bring herself to speak with him.

Marinette knew her father so well that she knew exactly what Thomas Dupain was expressing simply by the way he breathed. When he had sighed, she knew his brows would knit together and form several creases across his forehead, as he hung his head forward slightly. She knew that his eyes would trail to the loft where she resided, and he would debate behind sealed lips whether to talk to her or not. Marinette recognized the gulp of air that passed through his lips as he decided to say something but snapped shut at the last second. He felt defeated.

Neither could find their voices for they were lost in a sea of silent cries, both shouldering conflicts that the other could not help resolve with words. It was ironic because, at times of need, even a stranger would jump to help, but they were family. And they couldn't do anything for one another.

With another sigh, she heard the door close, followed by the heavy steps trudging down the stairs, with each weighing heavier from the last on her heart.

Marinette had lifted her head then. She peered into the darkness and made out a silhouette of her untouched dinner, still shrouded by a silver dome, and probably cold and unappetizing.

When she turned away from the meal, Tikki's voice would chime in her mind, chastising her for her laziness. No matter how many times her mind had played tricks on her, Marinette would fall for it. Her body would fall rigid and jolt as if electricity had coursed through her body. Whereas the whites of her eyes, now puffy and sensitive, and slathered with a blistering shade of crimson, would widen and peer around her room in search of her ruby kwami. And from time and time again, the raven-haired girl would be greeted back with disappointment and emptiness. Her kwami's name would roll out of her lips like a silent prayer, wishing that she would return to her and dissolve this never-ending nightmare, as scorching tears spilled down her ashen face.

Marinette's slender fingers had trailed up her cheeks and gently caressed the damp, swollen lumps, as if preventing any further overflow leakage like a boy had plugged his finger to prevent a leak in a dam; and winced internally as the stinging sensation throbbed beneath her fingertips from the numerous times she had wiped them with her hands and the fabric of her cotton shirt. Although the last time she had checked her reflection was days ago, Marinette laughed bitterly as she thought of how hideous her image must be at her current state. Still, she made no effort to fix herself. Instead, she forced her body to roll to her side and stared at the glass trapdoor.

A veil of murky ivory had adorned her disarray hair and lifeless eyes to a slant across her torso. Her eyes, the color of over-washed jeans, stared idly at the dark cumulus clouds as they reeled past her empty eyes like a film played over a vintage projector. It was not long before nostalgia had tugged at her heartstrings and brainwashed her thoughts with such vivid memories that she had almost completely mistaken it for reality. It happened at an instant; a silhouette figure had flitted across her vision, gliding across the sky like a graceful gazelle, but as soon as her eyes blinked, it had vanished.

Marinette knew that guilt and nostalgia was sending her mind off to an astral projection journey, because she had recalled the numbing sensation of the frigid night's kiss against her lips and cheeks, and how sweet it had tasted on her tongue to feel so light and free from her responsibilities and expectations in her hectic life. She also recalled how brightly lit the stars had twinkled as she sailed beneath them. Then she was submerged in the shadows once again under the arch. She felt Chat Noir's warmth post-resuscitation spread across her body, and she wondered to herself if that warmth could save her right now as she drifted from consciousness once again.

~~~~~~~

Alya, Adrien, and Nino decided to hang at the park right across from Marinette's house, giving Nino and Adrien an hour to help Alya calm down her nerves despite her insistence to go immediately. Reluctantly, Alya sighs and caves to the boys' suggestion. Alya plops herself on one of the park benches with Nino sitting right beside her and Adrien facing both of them.

"Really, I'm going to be fine guys. I just want to see Marinette…" her voice fades towards the end. Nino takes her hand in his and weaves his fingers through hers.

"It's alright, babe. We both know how much this is stressing you out. We don't even know what's going on in Marinette's life right now. It's pretty scary that she practically erased herself from existence."

Alya squeezes his hand appreciatively, "Yeah… let's just hope she didn't just disappear. I hope an akuma didn't get to her."

"Doubt it," Adrien states confidently. He had been sneaking out of his room during his piano practices and when everyone had returned to bed. Ladybug's absence had been bothered him endlessly. His brain had run through a marathon of worse case scenarios regarding capture from an akuma or being akumatized, but none had been in his radar throughout his patrol. Paris was finally peaceful… too peaceful that it had left Adrien feeling on the edge. He reaffirmed his thoughts with the conversation he had eavesdropped with Miss Bustier and Alya, "Mr. Dupain-Cheng would have noticed if his daughter was akumatized, and reported if it were the case. But he hasn't said anything. So that means Marinette is still at home."

Nino nods to his friend with agreement and gratitude before meeting Alya's troubled eyes, "Adrien's right, babe. You've seen Mr. Dupain ever since Marinette has been absent. If she were akumatized, you would definitely be the first to know. After all, you are Paris's greatest journalist on Ladybug and akumas."

Alya smiled weakly. She looked at her boyfriend then to Adrien, "Thank you, guys. I'm feeling a bit better about this."

"It's no problem," Adrien smiled.

"Yeah, we got you."

The trio walked in silence for a good two minutes before Alya broke the silence. "I want to see her… but I'm afraid she'll push me away again. This is really hard to go through."

Nino squeezed her hand, "We can try to ask Mr. Dupain about what's happening on her end if Marinette isn't ready to talk. We can't rush a person who is going through something, after all."

"She's your best friend, after all, Alya. Trust that Marinette will come to you as soon as she recovers," the blond model added.

"You're right, guys. I'm sorry for just rambling all of these stupid nonsenses," the auburn-haired woman said sheepishly.

"If Nino was in this situation, I probably would have reacted the same way," Adrien chirped.

"Dude…" the brown-skinned boy looked at his best friend with an awe-struck expression. Unsure of how to respond to Adrien's heartfelt comment, Nino lifts his free hand to bump fist with Adrien. "I'd definitely react the same for you too, dude."

Alysa clears her throat and feigns annoyance, "I appreciate you guys cheering me up, but save the bromance when I'm not here."

The two boys share eye contact and laugh with Alya joining in the humor.

"Sorry babe, you know how Adrien and I are. We're pretty tight."

"Yeah, yeah," Alya rolls her eyes.

"Why don't we start by a florist and get her a bouquet while we're at it?" Adrien suggests thoughtfully.

Alya's eyes sparkle. This was the first time Adrien had ever initiated getting flowers for Marinette-or maybe before any girl. Marinette will be so ecstatic when she hears about this, Alya thought to herself whilst picturing her best friend enter her rambling, fangirl episode followed by fainting. She giggles to herself.

"What is it?" the blond model asked curiously.

"Oh nothing!" Alya chirped, "I think it's a great idea! In fact, I know exactly what she likes!"

~~~~~~~

Alya, Nino, and Adrien stood in front of Tom & Sabine Boulangerie Patisserie. Adrien glanced over at Alya then back to the bouquet of red roses, white lilies, and white daisies. Hesitantly he asks, "Alya, you sure you don't want to be the one to give this to Marinette? You're closer to her after all."

Alya shared a mutual grin with her boyfriend before answering, "Of course it's fine! I know this will make her so happy Adrien, especially if it's coming from you!"

"I don't know…" the blond hair teenager tapered off hesitantly.

"Trust me, dude," Nino reassured, he smiled to his giggling girlfriend before continuing, "Marinette will definitely appreciate it."

"Really?" He looks back at the bouquet thoughtfully, a small grin etching on his face, "I hope she'll like it." Adrien turns to the auburn-haired teenager. "Shall we go in?"

"Yeah." Alya reaches for the door and was immediately greeted by a soprano jingle. To their surprise, the shop was empty. "Huh… that's strange. No one is here."

"Is it really okay to leave the shop unattended?" Nino asked aloud.

Adrien shrugged.

"Nope! I'm here!" The trio turned their attention to hurried stomps coming from the staircase followed by Mr. Dupain. "Hi guys, thanks for coming in today." He looked exhausted upon closer inspection. There were noticeable dark circles and creases forming under his puffy eyes. Perhaps the stress of their situation must be taking a toll on Mr. Dupain too. "I'm sorry you had to come all this way just to drop off her homework."

"Don't worry about it," Alya reassured him.

"We wanted to come here," Nino finished her sentence.

Mr. Dupain appeared perplexed and embarrassed as he scratched the nape of his neck.

"Marinette's our friend after all. She's important to us," Adrien added.

To his left, Alya and Nino exchanged a warm smile. "I wish I recorded this on my phone to show to Marinette," Alya whispered to Nino. "She would totally flip."

"Don't worry, I got you," Nino winked. He pulled out his phone to show that he was recording their conversation before hitting the stop button.

"Keep recording Nino! This is gold!"

"Alright, babe," he whispered back.

"I'll make it up to you afterward," Alya whispered and pecked the hand that was still holding on to hers.

"I'm expecting that," he replied suggestively.

"I see you have flowers for Marinette, Adrien?" Mr. Dupain continued. "That's very thoughtful of you to get her one."

"Yes, I mean we all-"

"Yes, it was a wonderful idea, Adrien!" Alya quickly cut off. "He came up with the idea after all!"

"Marinette sure is lucky to have you guys as her friends," Mr. Dupain praised then his expressions dropped as he continued, "But I'm afraid that Marinette may not be able to greet you guys again. I feel quite troubled to share this news with you guys after the trouble you guys have gone through," he glances at his watch, "especially leaving school at this time."

"It's okay, Mr. Dupain. We wanted to try regardless," the caramel skin woman tried her best to sound positive, but her expression betrayed her with defeat.

Nino took quick notice and squeezed her hand and continued, "With all due respect, Mr. Dupain, do you mind if we can talk to you about this? Everyone in class is really worried about her, and we don't know much of the details."

Mr. Dupain was silent as he crossed an arm and planted his elbow on his hand to support the other fist against his chin. After a minute, he nodded thoughtfully and affirmingly. "You guys can go ahead upstairs. I'll lock up the shop and we can talk this over some snacks. I'm guessing you guys haven't had anything since leaving school."

"You always know the right words, Mr. Dupain," Nino said happily, "Your pastries are the best in town!"

Mr. Dupain laughed, "Thanks, kid." Then directed his attention to Alya as he walked to the glass the door, "Lead the way. I'll be with you in a moment."

"Yes, sir!" Alya chirped with an improved mood, "Let's go, guys!" The auburn-haired teenager climbed up the stairs and made her way to the Dupain-Cheng's apartment with Nino and Adrien following suit. Once she opened the door, to their surprise, the living room looked the same: clean, organized-perhaps Mr. Dupain had been completing some light cleaning to keep himself busy. The only thing that was out of place, based on Alya's memory, is the family picture sitting on the kitchen counter. With some deductive reasoning, Alysa assumed that he had been looking at the frame during the last three days. She picks up the picture to observe the Dupain-Cheng family. Thomas Dupain stood in the back, Marinette on the left, and Sabine Cheng on the right. "They looked so happy in this picture."

Adrien approaches Alya and took note of the family picture that he had once observed when he was Cat Noir. He reminisced the silly memory when Marinette and he had been caught in a huge misunderstanding with Mr. Dupain and Mrs. Dupain-Cheng regarding their "feelings" for one another. "Yeah, it's so weird…" he had unconsciously admitted aloud, "It's really shocking to see Marinette and her parents so unhappy and stressed. I don't think there's ever been a time where I saw them like this… It's completely out of character for them." Adrien turns his attention to the stairs leading up to the Marinette's room and stares at her wooden hatch door pensively.

Alya and Nino follow his gaze and sigh simultaneously. "Come on," Alya initiated, "let's help Mr. Dupain and at least set up the plates." The others nodded and assisted Alya in collecting plates and the silverware.

After the trio had finished setting up, Mr. Dupain arrives with a variety of pastries hidden inside a silver tray. "You kids are just a lovely bunch. But you really didn't have to help set up. You're the guests after all."

"It's alright, Mr. Dupain. We want to help as much as we can. We've intruded after all," Alya replied.

"I appreciate it very much," the baker responded heartfeltly. He made his way to the kitchen counter and placed the silver tray on the table. He lifts the lid to reveal croissants, fresh marble bread, bon-bons, chocolate and caramel macaroons, various flavored macarons, and creampuffs. "Dig in, everyone!" The expressions on Marinette's friends' faces had washed over Thomas Dupain with a wave of nostalgia as the trio reached for their favorite pastry. Adrien's glowing eyes reminded him of his sweet daughter when she had received his delicious pastry on sad days. Nino and Alya, on the other hand, reminded him of himself and Sabine. Nino and Alya had simultaneously picked a pastry and had set it on their partner's plate rather than themselves. Both look surprised as they noticed their partner placing their food on their plate, followed by a sheepish smile and giggle. He missed his wife. He missed his daughter. He missed his family.

Adrien noticed the expression on Mr. Dupain's smile drooped, and his forehead knitted to form creases. Before he could eat his food, he had set it back down. This gesture had snapped the pastry chef back to the present.

"Is there something wrong, Adrien?" the giant man asked startled with concerned.

"No, sir," Adrien answered, "Sorry if this sounds nosy of me, but I couldn't but notice you looking stress."

Alya and Nino had stopped snacking their own food immediately and turned towards Mr. Dupain.

"Ah," Mr. Dupain answered. He sighed, defeated before continuing, "I just couldn't help but notice how nostalgic this feels. It has been three days since the last time Marinette, Sabine, and I had a happy moment like this. I know it hasn't been long since Sabine's departure, but three days feels like an eternity for me."

"No," Adrien disagreed, "three days is a long time. I totally get it."

"So it's been like this for three days?" Alya inquired.

"Well, Sabine and I had an argument before her departure to visit relatives back in China. Despite how many times Sabine and I argue, she has always been the one to keep a level-head, but I think I really upset her with what I said. Maybe Marinette overheard and was upset by it too," Mr. Dupain recounted.

"Was it that bad, Mr. Dupain?" Nino asked.

"Well, it's a marital tiff, I would say. But I don't think Marinette would react this badly to it. Marinette usually cheers me up when my wife and I have a disagreement. Honestly, she got her nature from her mother. She's very mature for her age."

Alya nodded approvingly, "Definitely."

"She was okay on the day Sabine left… well until in the evening."

"Evening?" Alya's ears perked, she had entered detective mode, "What do you mean?"

"I couldn't sleep that evening since Sabine had left. I was worried, but I also missed her. So, long story short, I felt the need to move about the house. Then Marinette came home. I don't remember seeing her leave the house after she got home from school. Perhaps," Thomas Dupain's forehead furrowed and he began to scratch his head in his recollection, "she left the house when it was rush hour. I probably missed her on her way out. Because there's no way she can get out from her balcony. It's too high and too dangerous. She could've hurt herself if she attempted to leave."

"That's right," Nino chimed in. He recalled the height of Marinette's home when they had paused outside of the bakery. "That would be impossible."

"The strangest part of all," Mr. Dupain continued. The trio was hooked to his story and had all subconsciously leaned towards him, forgetting the tasty treats in front of them. "She came home drenched. Paris was not raining that evening. When I asked her about what happened, she just looked at me and smiled. It was one of those forced smiles. She told me that she was having a bad day and needed time for herself." He gestured to her room with his gaze, "She's been in there ever since." With a sigh, he folds his arms across his chest and turns his attention back to the three students, "Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if she fell into the pool, but I would understand that that would be a mortifying experience."

"Have you ever once tried to go in there and talk to her?" Adrien asked.

"I have a couple of times, but she won't respond. When she responds to me… it's like she's lifeless. She won't talk about what happened. All I can do is just leave food at the foot of her door. The only thing I'm grateful about is that she actually eats, although it's not much."

Alya hangs her head in frustration. Her hands glide under glasses to smother her face as if it were a windshield dragging dirt downwards. Nino slides his arm around her shoulder to comfort her. Adrien joins the consolidation by patting her back softly. "I just don't get it," she mutters, "this is really all new to me too, Mr. Dupain."

"Totally," Nino agrees softly, "we've never seen Marinette act like this before."

Suddenly they heard a loud thud upstairs and all four members sprang to their feet. Mr. Dupain was the first to dash up to the stairs and knocked on the hatch door. Alya, Nino, and Adrien rushed behind him. "Marinette! Are you okay up there?"

No response.

"Marinette!"

"Yeah…" a weak voice croaked back. Her voice was soft, a bit more audible than a whisper, but it was the kind of soft voice you would hear your friend whisper in your ear. She was near them as if she was face-planted to the hatch. The only thing that divided them now was the wooden hatch. "You okay, honey? Do you want me to get the food?"

"No, I'm okay. I'll bring it down. I can do that at the very least."

"Okay, well you have guests over, honey."

No response.

"Marinette?"

"I don't look decent to come down."

Alya stepped closer to the hatchet and replied, feeling relieved at last, "Then dress up a bit, Marinette! We know you're not feeling so well, so don't push yourself too hard. Do you need my help?"

"We?" she asked in her low voice.

"Your dad, Nino, Adrien, and I."

"Adrien…?" she whispered softly. Fortunately only Mr. Dupain and Alya were the only two who heard her whisper the model's name.

"Would you mind letting me in?" Alya requested.

"No, it's fine, Alya. I'll go down. Just give me ten," Marinette's voice grew a little stronger.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, let me just clean myself up a bit."

"Okay, we'll be out here," Alya concluded. Marinette responded with her feet shuffling away from the hatch.

~~~~~~~

Marinette's room was an absolute chaos. Papers were tossed aside, her mirror in disarray and a red and blackboard marker sat uncapped on her dresser. A child's drawing of a red kwami floated on the top left of her vanity mirror, another one was floating on her computer's black screen, and another one was on her mini wash station mirror. Each wore a smile. In her head, she heard Tikki's voice chastising her.

You should make yourself more presentable Marinette! You have guests over! They must've been worried sick about you!

She stared at her poorly drawn kwami on her vanity mirror and responded, "I'm not feeling well."

Doesn't justify you to be rude, Marinette!

"Let me be…"

The poorly-drawn kwami stared back at her in silence with a wide smile.

Marinette sighed, "You were right, Tikki…" Marinette looked at the left corner of where her floating red kwami usually levitated. A tear escaped her abused, puffy eyes, "You were right, all along… I'm so sorry."

~~~~~~~

© Cover photoshopped and edited by XxScarletxRosexX © Miraculous: The Lost Memoirs written by XxScarletxRosexX © Miraculous Ladybug: The Tales of Ladybug and Chat Noir belongs to Thomas Astruc © Lyrics from Flashlight by Jessie J. © Easter Egg idea from Instagram: where the same bouquet has been used in multiple scenarios (I cannot find the reference at the moment!) © Eater Egg 2 from a scene in Weredad © Location of College Francois Dupont / Francois Dupont High School referenced from Episode: Robocop

[sieben9]

“the final battle” impressions

{Quick request to anyone reading: I’m watching OUaT for the first time, and I want to avoid spoilers. So, if you want to discuss something spoilery, I’d be grateful if you could start a new post for that. Thank you!}

Ah Once, what am I going to do with you?

I mean, this episode was definitely an Experience™, that much is certain. Just… ::sighs::

Look, if I try to sum it up, I think the best I can do is “this was twenty minutes of a really good finale stuck inside a rushed ninety-minute wtf-fest. Also, those twenty minutes belong to a totally different season.

this is the sort of thing you’ve got to foreshadow at least a LITTLE

The acting was pretty damn good, though.

(Fair warning: don’t open this on mobile, there’s a ridiculous amount of pictures under the cut)

OK. So. Couple of things that I really liked up front, so I can gripe in peace later on. (And readers can skip whatever part they wish ; )

First, and I realise this is a weird thing to enjoy, but I loved how utterly despicable I found Fiona in this one. She may have hung around like a bad smell for most of the season without really doing much, but she sure stepped up her game for the occasion.

Seriously, if Rumple hadn’t killed her, I would have found a way. “Our son”, indeed.

Though, please, have some pity on the poor guy. At this point, he has killed both his parents, and one of them twice. That can’t be good for anyone.

oh look the wall robots are still there

And speaking of Rumple… dang, that was a good scene in the mines. What I loved most about it was that this was literally all him. Nobody would ever know what he did in there if he didn’t tell them, except for himself, and he still made the right choice. Despite being offered everything he ever wanted, despite being under the influence of his curse just as much as ever…

before you ask, yes, my mind did go Places

…and more literally than it’s usually shown. Well done, pal. I should probably be more excited about this, but despite the tense buildup, I feel like the scene kind of fizzled as a whole. Maybe because he already made the exact same choice earlier, and was just confirming that he really meant it, too. Still, it was a good moment, and I was very proud of this walking human disaster by the time it was done.

Some more on the topic of Rumple: congratulations on his acting skills. Rumple’s, not Robert Carlyle’s, specifically. Because there’s no way in hell I could have seen these photos…

…and kept a straight face. Honestly, I’m half convinced that they were a test by Fiona to see if he was awake after all.

Oh, and the book!

The book made it across! And you know why? Because Belle and her son have True Love, even if Gideon cannot remember that, because Fiona is The Worst. And Rumple worked so hard to make Gideon remember; it was heartbreaking to see. I mean, he had to do that for… what? Five hours? And he still couldn’t stand the thought that Gideon might believe his mother didn’t love him. It was a good scene, OK?

On a sillier note (but still unambiguously positive): Emma’s wardrobe came back for the finale!

I don’t know, it’s just nice to see.

Other things I loved a lot:

Any and all interactions between Regina and her now-settled other half. Just. Pure joy, even in the midst of the wtf-ery. And with the obvious standout-moment when the Queen goes and sacrifices herself to give the others that tiny bit of time they need to get back to their world and help Henry (and Emma, but I think we all know who the priority was in this case)

Just… damn. I’m still worried about this woman’s self-destructive streak in general, but this was a good moment. (It also helps that she got better. ‘cause that could have been really depressing otherwise.)

Oh, and since we’re speaking of Regina (or the Reginas, plural), I absolutely adored the speech she gave Emma. Just… I mean, I expect the hope speeches from Snow (and that one was pretty good, too), but this? I mean… wow. Please compare and contrast with season 1. Except you don’t have to, because Regina already did that, and it was beautiful.

Then we have an actual mirrored TLK (see below for a botched version…) in this very good moment:

Like, yes, I love bookends, and this was a great one. Calling back to the “holy crap why didn’t I see this coming” kiss in s1 worked surprisingly well, considering how little interaction Emma and Henry had this season, but there’s enough material in the show in general to make me buy into this. Like I said: sucker for bookends.

In general, I feel like this episode was at its strongest whenever re-focused on the family relationships between the characters.

And to close it out, the ending montage.

Just... it’s like Snow said. They get to live their happy endings now. Snowing finally have the time to be a proper family (and David got a dog!). Regina is accepted and loved by her people (and the Queen gets to have a completely “new adventure”, as Robin so aptly put it.) Snow can do what she loves and doesn’t have to fight all the time anymore. And Emma finally has a place in the world; one where she can settle and be comfortable and doesn’t have to be alone anymore... and I’ll just leave it at that. It’s a good ending.

And no, I haven’t forgotten it--obvious special mention to this bit here:

Yup. Killed me dead. And I died happy, thank you very much. They’ve been through so much bullshit, and now they can be together, and raise their son in peace, and won’t be really worried when he doesn’t stop growing, either.

I also want to give a special shoutout to the five six people who immediately made sure that I knew that 1) the kiss wasn’t scripted and 2) we, as a fandom, are extremely lucky to have Robert and Emilie. (For those who haven’t seen the interview in question, it’s here, and here)

The finishing dinner was nice, too, even if I’m not sure what the whole Last Supper imagery was supposed to do.

Listen, I’ve been going “just let them be happy!” for way too long to complain much when they finally are. Also, I could write an essay on the range of emotions Rumple goes through when he comes through that door and people are actually happy to see him and his family. Or about that look that passes between him and Regina, because I caught that and it made me cry! I don’t think either of them ever imagined they would really be this happy again when they first met and they’ve been through so much crap and just... guh. I like this. It’s a good closing shot.

And now, the rest.

Because frankly, this wasn’t a great finale. It wasn’t even that good of an episode. It was everything wrong with the 4B finale, only more of that.

For example: What was the deal with making Emma lose her belief? Since when was her belief required for the magical realms to exist? The only person who’s ever had even something approaching that function was Henry. She didn’t need to believe in magic to keep it alive, she needed it to break the curse.

And this was never set up as the Black Fairy’s plan. Not even a little. This came so out of left field, it wasn’t even in the same stadium! And it’s so frustrating, because this wasn’t a bad plot, as such, but there was no build-up, no real payoff, nothing. Or, let me put it differently: this was a perfectly fine plot resolution, it just had no business being attached to this season.

Everything felt rushed, there were about five dozen plot points, none of them with any time to breathe and somehow, we still got that terminally boring climb up the bean stalk.Sorry, David, you know I love you, but what was the point of that sidetrack? Nothing happened. There was no try-and-fail cycle (because there wasn’t time for one) and honestly, if you needed a handwave for how they got back from the magical realms, maybe you could have gone with a less time intensive one?

And that moment where Snow kisses David back to life? Yeah, unearned, again. And dear show: the cut-in from the first episode worked for the split-heart curse, because you were subverting it. But here? It just didn’t do anything. This wasn’t a parallel. David wasn’t cursed, he was crushed by a beanstalk.

And speaking of things that don’t make sense…

For the love of fuck. Her ankle? Really? This is such a cliché that even the slasher genre doesn’t do it anymore. And it’s a dumb cliché, too. It’s rooted sexism and it makes it look like you didn’t have any other ideas. I get it, you don’t want Belle with Rumple at that final point so she doesn’t influence his decision. Here’s a thought, then: let her stay behind for a good reason! Or, hell, if you don’t want to write a scene for her (the writers sure seem to be allergic to giving Belle any screentime), let there be a fork in the road! They don’t have the time to check each one, let Belle go one way and Rumple another. It’s still a lazy plot excuse, but at least it’s not the stupidest cliché in the book.

And one more thing…

::sigh:: I have such mixed feelings about this?

Because on the one hand: Gideon had a life that nobody would want. He was kidnapped, imprisoned, kept in the dark and abused for all of his twenty-eight years, and even if he got free, he would never get that time back. Nobody would ever choose that for themselves.

At the same time… Gideon died. The person I got to know over the last half-season is no more. He’s gone. And he never had any say in the matter. Hell, he didn’t even get to say goodbye. It’ just such a messed-up way to get a wonderful thing.

(Also, while I’m on that topic… yes, I did notice that Rumple didn’t recognise his very tiny son at first, and I realise that it’s because he’s never seen him before. It prompted a particularly long “oh noo…”, too.)

And finally…

… that cliffhanger/teaser, though, huh?

I have so many questions. Why was Henry in that monster forest? Why is he now in an apartment and doesn’t remember his daughter? When did he get a daughter? (Also, who with? Enquiring minds would like to know.)

So. I know, like, three things about s7, and one of them is the cast list. Please try not to spoil anything else, because that’s already way more than I wanted to know going in. Seriously, I’m a reasonably grown adult. I can deal with a couple of surprises.

[keiraknighted]

Now I’m Addicted (Chapter 3)

AO3 // ff.net

Clarke wakes up with a scratchy throat, but it’s quickly forgotten when Bellamy wakes up beside her and lazily fingers her to orgasm. Wells is never in the mood for sex in the morning, preferring to get an extra twenty minutes of sleep, but Bellamy has no such preference, and his fingers are quickly replaced with his cock, quickly making her come again before he fills her with his come.

“I wish we could stay here all day,” Clarke complains as Bellamy gets out of bed to clean himself up. She lets her eyes roam over his naked body, enjoying the view. “I just want you to fuck me over and over and over…”

Bellamy smirks at her. “I know you do. But it’s better if you have to wait for it.”

Clarke pouts. “Do we at least have time for one more before we have to go to work?”

Bellamy tilts his head, considering. “Maybe if we shower at the same time.”

That’s enough to get Clarke out of bed, and she drags Bellamy to the bathroom, managing to get her lips on his a few times before they squeeze into the shower. It isn’t really big enough for two people, but Clarke wants to be as close to him as possible anyway, so it doesn’t really matter. Bellamy presses her against the shower wall and fucks her from behind, the hard planes of his body pressed against her back as he kisses her neck and rolls his hips against her slowly.

She’s late for work, despite her best intentions, flushed, horny and panty-less. Worse than that, she’s more aware that her throat hurts, and by lunch it feels like she must have swallowed a bunch of razors. At around 3pm she starts sneezing, and by the time she knocks off at 5, she has to admit it to herself: she’s sick.

She curls up in bed as soon as she gets home, feeling sorry for herself. She knows it’s just a cold, but it’s only going to get worse before it gets better, and there is no way Bellamy is going to want to fuck a sick person. Not that she can blame him. With the way she’s feeling she doesn’t think she’s up to it anyway. And she probably won’t be better until after Wells gets home, so the whole week is ruined.

Bellamy gets home 20 minutes after she does, calling her name, and Clarke wants nothing more than to feel well so he can fuck her into oblivion. Bellamy flicks on the light as he enters the bedroom. Clarke is facing away from him, curled up so he can’t see her red and runny nose.

“In bed already?” he says, and she hears him kick off his shoes.

“Bell,” she sniffles. “You should go home.” There’s a pause, and then Clarke feels the mattress sink with his weight.

“Why?” he asks, sounding concerned. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?” He reaches out to rub her shoulder.

“I’m fine. I just have a cold.”

“Oh. Do you want me to get you something? A hot drink? Some medicine?”

Clarke shakes her head, but she still doesn’t face him. “I just want you to go.”

He still doesn’t leave. “Are you sure?” he asks, hesitant. “Wells isn’t here to look after you.”

“I don’t want you to see me like this,” Clarke says, and she thinks she might sound like a petulant child. “I only want you to think of me as sexy.”

“Clarke,” Bellamy says, sounding a little exasperated.

“You’ll think it’s gross and then you won’t want to have sex with me ever again.”

Bellamy laughs and Clarke scowls. She feels him scoot closer to her and then his body is pressed against hers, spooning her, pressing his lips to her shoulder.

“Do you remember your twenty-first birthday?” he murmurs.

“Not really.”

He laughs again, and Clarke feels a weird tug in her stomach. Does his laugh turn her on?

“Not surprising,” he says. “You and Octavia went out, and then you stayed over.”

“Right. Is there a point to this?”

“I’m getting there,” Bellamy says. “You were both wasted. Even though Octavia was only twenty and I specifically told her not to drink until she was old enough,” he says, annoyed.

“Bell. The point.”

“Sorry. Octavia passed out on the couch, and I went to get to get you a glass of water and when I came back you were bawling your eyes out. Some drunk existential crisis. You had mascara all over your face and your hair was a mess. And then when I tried to comfort you, you threw up on me. And yourself.”

“Is this supposed to be making me feel better?”

“I’m saying I’ve already seen you at your worst. And I still want to have sex with you. Well, not right now because you’re sick. But when you’re not sick I promise I’ll still think you’re sexy.”

Clarke chews her lip. Why is he being so nice to her? Sex is off the table and he’s still here. She’s not sure how she’s supposed to feel, what she’s supposed to think.

“And remember the time—”

“Okay, I get it,” Clarke cuts him off. “No need to bring up every time I’ve ever been ugly.”

“You’ve never been ugly,” Bellamy assures her. “Let me take care of you,” he whispers. “I promise I’m good at it.”

Clarke hesitates. She still feels like she should say no, but she’s not sure why. “Okay,” she says. “A hot drink would be nice.”

It turns out Bellamy is good at taking care of sick people. He changes her sheets and provides her with medicine and a honey and lemon drink. He cooks for her, and he’s actually really good at it, though admittedly Clarke can’t taste much while she’s sick. They eat on the couch in front of the TV, Clarke swaddled in blankets.

After dinner he tucks her back in bed.

“You want me to go?” Bellamy asks her.

Clarke shakes her head. “Stay,” she tells him.

“I can sleep on the couch if you want.”

“Don’t be stupid,” Clarke says. “You won’t fit.” She grabs his arms and drags him into bed with her, though he’s still fully dressed. He pulls his shirt off and Clarke gets her laptop from the bedside table before leaning back against him and hitting play on an episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine that she’s already seen seven times.

“Oh hey, I love this one,” Bellamy says.

“Me too,” Clarke says. But she’s asleep before it ends.

  Clarke checks the time when she wakes up, panicking when she sees it’s after ten. She hasn’t called her boss to let her know she’s sick. She quickly dials her boss’s number. She’s going to be in so much trouble.

“Clarke?” Diyoza answers.

“I’m so sorry,” Clarke says quickly. “I’m really sick. I slept in and—”

“I know, Clarke,” Diyoza interrupts.

“You know?”

“Your boyfriend called earlier.”

“Wells?”

“Yeah, Wells. It’s just a cold, isn’t it?”

“Well, yeah.”

“So you’ll be back Friday.”

“Okay.”

“See you then, Clarke.” Diyoza hangs up and Clarke puts her phone down, confused. Is Wells home? Does he know she’s sick?

Bellamy walks into the bedroom. “You’re awake,” he says.

“What are you doing here?” Clarke asks. “Shouldn’t you be at work?”

“I called in sick. I also called in sick for you.”

“Oh. Did I get you sick?”

“No, I just thought you might want some company,” Bellamy shrugs. “You want something to eat?”

Clarke nods. “Just some toast please.”

“I’ll make you some tea as well. How are you feeling?”

“Crappy.”

Bellamy gives her a sympathetic smile. “Take a couple more tablets. It’ll help with the symptoms.”

Clarke nods and Bellamy leaves the room to make her breakfast.

He stays with her the whole day and they watch a movie and play some video games. Clarke finds herself actually enjoying his company, despite the fact that her nose keep running and her chest is all congested.

Maybe it’s odd that she and Bellamy never really became friends. She and Octavia met in freshman year of college when they were assigned as each other’s roommates, and she’s known Bellamy just as long, since he was the one helping Octavia move in that day. But Clarke had always found him annoyingly overprotective of Octavia, and somehow he always managed to ruin their fun. He acted more like Octavia’s father than her brother most of the time. Which he had to be, in a way, Clarke supposes. Octavia’s father was never around and Aurora, Bellamy and Octavia’s mother, died young, when Octavia was fifteen and Bellamy was twenty.

Bellamy is definitely more fun now.

It looks like he’s still planning to stay the whole week, and honestly, Clarke is grateful. It’s not that she doesn’t like being alone, but being sick and alone kind of sucks. And she finally has some competition at Mario Kart, since Wells sucks at it.

Bellamy makes soup for dinner, and they eat in front of the TV again. They’re halfway through watching an episode of The Bachelor that happens to be on (though both of them claim they don’t want to watch it), when Bellamy’s phone rings, and it’s Octavia.

“Hey,” he answers, muting the TV. “What’s going on?” Clarke watches him as he listens to whatever Octavia is saying. “Oh, uh… I’m at Clarke’s, actually.” A pause. “What? Clarke and I are totally friends.” He rolls his eyes and Clarke bites back a smile. “Don’t be stupid. She’s sick and I’m looking after her… that’s correct, he’s not here… I don’t hate him. Okay, maybe I hate him a bit.” Clarke raises her eyebrows at him and he pokes his tongue out. They’re obviously talking about Wells. “Ha, very funny. I won’t. Okay, love you too, bye.” He hangs up.

“What was that all about?” Clarke asks.  

“She wanted to know why I wasn’t home,” Bellamy says. “She was hoping I’d cook her something because she can’t be bothered,” he rolls his eyes.

“She could come here,” Clarke suggests.

Bellamy looks taken aback by the suggestion, like he’d never considered it. “She might get your cold,” he says.

“Fair enough,” Clarke shrugs. He doesn’t seem to care if he gets her cold though. “Do you really hate Wells?”

Bellamy shrugs. “Kind of.”

“Why?”

“He’s pretentious,” Bellamy says. “And he’s always up on his high horse, acting like he’s some kind of morality god.”

“You hate him because he’s a good person.”

“Shut up,” Bellamy says, nudging her with his shoulder.

Clarke studies him for a moment. “You’re a good person too, you know,” she tells him.

Bellamy gives her a sceptical look. “Pretty sure if I was a good person I wouldn’t be secretly fucking a woman who has a boyfriend. Even if I hate that boyfriend.”

Clarke reddens. “Well. Apart from that.” She’s well aware this means that she is also a bad person. But she’s known it for a while now, and it doesn’t really bother her anymore.

Bellamy throws his arm around her and pulls her in close. He grabs the remote and unmutes the TV. “Who cares, anyway? Being good is overrated.”

  They both go to work on Friday, and Clarke is feeling a lot better, though she’s not totally over her cold. But if she’s well enough to go to work, she’s well enough to have Bellamy eat her out tonight. She still doesn’t want him to kiss her face until she’s better, but it’s too much to be around him all week and not have him get her off somehow. Then again, she doesn’t know if she’ll be satisfied with just that, and she’ll probably end up begging him to fuck her. Being sick and horny at the same time kind of sucks.

She gets home and showers, and then patiently waits for Bellamy to get home. Only, when the door finally opens, it’s not Bellamy, it’s Wells. Clarke’s stomach drops.

“Hey!” she says, jumping up from the couch. Her voice is too high, her eyes too wide, but she hopes Wells doesn’t notice her panic. “You’re home early!”

“Yeah,” Wells smiles. He drops his bag and pulls Clarke into his arms and kisses her. “I missed you. We finished early so I figured I may as well come home tonight instead of tomorrow morning.”

“That’s great!” Clarke lies. All she can think about is how Bellamy’s things are still in their bedroom, and that in a few minutes Bellamy himself will probably be walking through that door.

“Hey, you know what we should do?” Clarke says. “We should go out for a drink and maybe dinner!”

“Yeah, okay,” Wells smiles. “Just let me get changed.”

“No!” Clarke says quickly. “You look great like that.”

Wells gives her an amused look. “Okay,” he agrees. He looks Clarke up and down. She’s just wearing underwear and a robe again. “What about you?”

“Right! I’ll be two minutes. Wait here.”

Clarke grabs her phone and hurries into the bedroom, texting Bellamy as she goes.

Wells home. We’re going out so you can grab your things and hide any other evidence you were here. I’m sorry.

She sends the message and throws on a dress and some heels before dragging Wells out of the apartment. She tries to tell herself the heavy feeling in the bottom of her stomach is guilt. Maybe that would mean she’s not as terrible as she thinks she is. But she knows it’s not really guilt. It’s crushing disappointment.

[misssophiachase]

Mini prompts! Yes! I really enjoyed the premiere episode of the Originals but would love to see more of Klaroline from that universe. So, can you write me a deleted scene? Pretty please?

Hehe thanks nonnie, greatprompt! I loved it too, every single bit! It was all wonderful but I can’tget past Caroline making Klaus clean, like it was all of my Klaroline, domesticdreams come true. Consider this my first Klaroline Countdown offering for theweek too : ) 

Where You Left Your Heart

Paris, France

“Seriously, Klaus?” Heraised his gaze curiously to the blonde in question, hands on delicious,pant-clad hips with a cleaning cloth grasped firmly in her right hand.  

What had he done now? TheOriginal Hybrid was already on hands and knees scrubbing the blood stainedfloor at her behest. What more could she possibly want?

“You’ll have to be morespecific, love,” he growled, pretending to be annoyed by her constantinterruptions but a slight smile tugged at the corner of his lips thinking he’dgladly clean all day, if it meant Caroline would stay forever.

She’d arrived like awhirlwind but had since become more like a calm in the eye of the storm he’dbeen living in the past seven years. She was as beautiful as ever, notthat Klaus doubted that, but there was something different about her. Itwas a calming combination of experience and maturity, even if she did throw him roughly against awall.  

The fact she could barrelinto his life, grab him by the neck and make him fall in love with her all overagain was familiar as it was overwhelming.

There were two things themost powerful creature on the planet didn’t do and it was let anyone manhandlehim or make him partake in domestic chores. Within thirty minutes she’d done justthat and it was like no time had passed between them and Klaus couldn’thave been happier at his current predicament.

“You missed a spot,” shegestured to a small drop the size of an ant. 

“I don’t think they’llnotice,” he shot back. Riling up Caroline Forbes was one of his favouritepastimes, one he had severely missed.

“That’s beside the point,”she hissed, bending down and pushing him over so she could clean up theoffending mark. “This is a heritage building and I’m fairly certain theinterior designers didn’t have ‘hybrids go wild’ blood splattered floorcoverings in mind.”

She was now rubbing upagainst him, most probably by accident given just how much she was getting intocleaning the floor but Klaus wasn’t about to complain. 

“Hybrids go wild? You makeit sound like some kind of a Spring Break teen adventure gone wrong.” 

“Didn’t think you wereinto that kind of thing but, you know, each to their own,” she muttered. 

“Probably more Kol’s speedback in the day,” he chuckled. “You know when I promised to show you Paris oneday I never imagined we’d be cleaning blood stained floors.”

“Well, you know if you’dactually behaved and not decided to massacre half the city we could be sittingin a cute, roadside café eating beignets,” she stopped briefly to send him her best eyebrow raise. 

“Tease,” he smirked,flashing her one of his dimples in return.

“Don’t do that.”

“Don’t do what?”

“Try flirting with me whenI’m here to reprimand you for being an absentee father. The fact I also endedup reprimanding you for your terrible cleaning techniques was something entirelyunexpected.”

“What can I say? I have minions for this type of thing incase you’d forgotten.” 

“How could I forget,” she mumbled, back to rubbing the floor with her cloth.  

“Have you perhaps had thisobsessive, compulsive, cleaning condition looked at, love?” 

“Have you had thisobsessive, compulsive, serial killing thing looked at, Mikaelson? Last time Ichecked a bit of a cleaning habit has nothing on this roomful of dead bodies.”

“Touche,” heconceded. “But I think you’re going to have to tutor me in all thingscleaning if this place is ever going to resemble its former glory.”

“I bet you say that to allthe girls,” she drawled, a grin crossing her face as she said it. 

“Only the obsessively,compulsively clean ones,” he promised.

“Well, for starters,” shebegan, looking him up and down critically before placing her hand on his left hip. “Your stance is all wrong for the maximumscrubbing impact.”

“Well, we can’t have that now, love, can we?” He felt his body heat up from her touch, his hand instinctively covering hers protectively. Their gazes met, dark blue against light and it was obvious she was struggling with just how close they’d become.  

“Get serious, Klaus,” she growled, her hands finding his neck again. “I’d have no qualms in killing you, if you touch me like that again, got me?”

“I have to say I’d be interested to see you try,” her annoyed expression was telling Klaus he’d gone too far. “Noted.”

“Now, let’s get back to the cleaning, shall we?” 

“I’d be more than happy to get you that beignet for all your assistance, love,” he smiled, grateful for any extra time he had with Caroline. 

“I guess we’ll have to see just how well you clean up your mess, Mikaelson,” she barked, her double meaning was not lost on him. “Now, back to work.” Klaus could swear he saw her pink lips curve into a small smile but wasn’t brave enough to call her out on it, yet anyway.  

[darknessismynewfriend]

I'm Going To Scream

It's like the world is slamming representations and signs of him in my face

Everywhere I turn I see a sign of the military

Specifically the Marines

Of Brazil

Engagement

Or marriage

Even at moments voodoo

I see guys that look alarmingly like him but also not quite

Constantly

People randomly bring him up to me

When if asked they say they don't normally talk about him they just felt like bringing him up to me

I asked if normally he's talked about in my group of friends and they say they don't really talk about him ever and yet with me they always seem to bring him up

I wear beautiful gold and diamond rings

Three of them

One is a pearl

But people only ever seem to comment on my silver metal bracelet with a marbled pink stone with a white flower in the center

By all intents and purposes it's not nearly as pretty as the gold, diamonds and pearl

And yet it's the only thing that people comment on

It's a bracelet he gave me

I purposely avoid listening to the radio to prevent myself from hearing our song come on even though it's not a popular song

My alarm clock went off the other day and was on the radio setting of a popular in-trend music station

The song that finally woke me up was our song

Once again it wasn't super popular when it came out

Obviously I freaked out and immediately shut it off

I was watching a trailer on Netflix for To All The Boys I Ever Loved

A show I had been avoiding seeing even the trailer for, for no particular reason

Other than it seemed like it had the possibility of being cheesy

A minute or two into the trailer a familiar set of chords start to play but I didn't notice because I was too enraptured in the plot of the trailer

It seemed like a surprisingly good story

I was mildly regretting not having watched it sooner

However a nagging at the back of my head started to get louder

There was something familiar

Then I noticed the song when the chorus got loud enough instead of the talking being the focus

I instantly screamed "oh my God!" several times in fear as my throat started to close and the overwhelming need to cry started to override everything else as I physically yanked my earphones from my head

I was having a panic attack one day and I tried to go down a side area of a building at school to hide and cry alone

I first went down the right and saw a beautiful mural with jungle around the edges of the wall and pretty heart shaped red flowers all over with the sky in the center, pretty and blue, with a big red heart with a banner

My first thought was that the mural was pretty

I then saw the banner and wondered what it said

I looked and it read "Engagement Center"

It stung to see, dredging up memories, so I turned in a bit of a fury and decided to go down the left side of the building

As I did so I was thinking to myself that there is no way there could be something triggering on this side of the building with these offices, that would just be too cruel I was thinking in delirious amusement

I stopped in front of the offices similar to the ones I had just left and slowly with caution turned my head

It read "Veterans Center"

The next day I was walking into school having mostly forgotten about what happened that previous day or at least trying to ignore it

And as I'm heading to class two Marines walk right past me

Obviously this made me freeze up for a few seconds in cold fear of yet again the memories dredging up

How unfair that the day after I got one of my biggest signs I get yet another one

I really wish I was making this up

When all of this started I had no idea how much would keep slamming into me

I had been watching a TV show called Married With Children in an attempt to keep my mind off of him

It's an old show from the late nineties that definitely should have absolutely nothing and no one that would remind me of him

But instead on one of the first episodes I watched the daughter who is very much the stereotype for a dumb slut

Went to an audition for a part in a show and was failing at getting the role and ended up talking about her family that was very odd

The producers found it interesting, lied to her saying they're going in a different direction and made the TV show using her family as the premise

She only finding out about this when she was watching the "New show" with her family and it started to depict them all rather unflatteringly

They asked how she described herself and she said she was a Harvard graduate, did everything in the house, only one with sense and was the main breadwinner

But instead the producers having paid attention to how she was in the interview depicted her accurately so when she came out on the show she walked down from the stairs dressed in skimpy clothing asking her father for some money for her and her guests to go to the mall because they got hungry

Seconds later a line of men, one from each branch of the military, walked down the stairs after her

The very first one being a Marine

I'm positive, I know those camo's, I've sadly memorized them by now

He even had the audacity to even look like him

I thought that would be the only instance of something reminding me of him happening and that it wouldn't happen again

But clearly I was wrong

More instances keep popping up every day

I see commercials for the military all the time either asking to enlist or for you to send food or money out

I randomly have been meeting way more and seeing way more people in the military

I watch a TV show that should have absolutely nothing to do with the military and yet for some reason, suddenly in said show, they are going to be feeding their US Marines or helping feed their US Military

Or by chance on one of the cooking shows like Diners Drive Ins and Dives one of the owners or cooks or patrons that they talked to by chance managed to be an ex marine or an ex military veteran

I watch a written TV show that is about drama or action and somehow a Marine character specifically manages to be in the show

Several times

In several different shows

A friend recently told me how he likes me, has liked me for a long time. And wants to possibly date me

This made me conflicted on even the idea but then again I did have a crush on this person for two and a half years

The next day when my alarm clock woke me up three songs came on that I associate with him

Granted not our song but three songs that I strongly associate with moments that revolve around him

They came on in a row

One after the other

When the first one came on, I said it was nothing

Pure chance

The second one that came on I said it was a coincidence

That it didn't matter

By the third I had no choice but to accept it was probably the universe purposely slamming me in the face because three is a pattern

For the first time in months since he broke up with me I recently tried to listen to the radio

I have been avoiding it because of the chance of our song possibly coming on but I figured time had passed and it was probably extremely unlikely it would even come on since it wasn't very popular

The second song that came on it was ours

Unsurprisingly I freaked out and switched stations

I met someone recently who is amazing and she is a great friend already we relate a lot to each other and are just in general very similar

She after I told her a little bit about him took a couple of seconds and suddenly yelled out his name

I didn't realize it but I hadn't said his name up until that point

So when she yelled, it startled me

She then told me that she knew him, that she had talked to him quite a bit last year

That he seemed very sardonic and sarcastic and had a dry sense of humor but that after a while he started to seem a little happier and he would often talk about how he had gotten a girlfriend he really liked

What are the chances that a new friend that I was connecting very well with apparently knew him already

I go on YouTube and I watch videos and randomly I get notifications for Brazilian recipes for desserts made by a real Brazilian

I never look up anything Brazilian on YouTube or even the Internet in general and yet for some reason that was being shot into my feed

I watch a video about cheating exes and the guy who starts talking says that he came from Brazil

I watch Marvel's Cloak-and-Dagger thinking it's a superhero show that seems to have nothing to do with anything that could remind me of him but then it turns out that it's a show based in New Orleans with a heavy voodoo theme

That's not even counting the large amount of times that I've seen things revolving around engagement or marriage whether it be an engagement show or a show about a married couple or a show about wedding dresses

For some reason more than normal it seems like they are predominant