#even if you’re a joker knockoff

[escapeaddict]

rip Sweet Tooth you will always be famous

[soulmate-game]

This is an alternate ending for my Bio!dad Joker / Bio!mom Harley AU. Or really, the timeline itself will be entirely different starting from the moment that Marinette’s plane lands in Gotham. If you haven’t read the original, you can do so here.

—*—*—*—*—*

“He’s going to find out, Mom.”

“No he won’t, don’t be silly! I’ve been very careful about hiding you from him, Nettie-pie.”

“Mom… I just have a bad feeling. I don’t think we can hide who I am from him. If he sees me, I think he’ll know.”

The phone went silent.

“If he hurts you, I’ll kill him. If I was crazy about him, Sugar, then I’m head over heels for you. Not even he can stop me from caving his skull in if he tries his usual tricks with you.”

“... My plane leaves soon, I’ll talk to you when I land. And mom?”

“Yeah, honeycake?”

“I love you.”

—*—*—*—*—*

Marinette often hated how accurate her intuition tended to be. She had barely even stepped out of the airport before she had felt the prick of a needle in her neck and the sensation of being shoved into a small, dark space before her vision cut out.

Looks like her mom wasn’t able to hide her existence away as well as they thought.

And unfortunately for Marinette, her darling asshole of a father had apparently had ample time to plan his first meeting with her. If he had just used the much easier to acquire Chloroform on her, then Marinette likely would have woken up early enough to come up with a plan. Chloroform was unreliable and wore off fairly easily. But no, he had actually had the time to steal hospital grade anesthetic.

Which meant that Marinette woke up with her wrists zip-tied to heavy links of chain above her head, and her ankles connected to the chain below her with what felt like ten layers of duct tape.

Lovely.

“Ah, there she is! Good morning, sleepyhead!” Those were the high-pitched, dramatic words she heard when she came back to consciousness. She didn’t even need to open her eyes to know who the speaker was— she had watched enough videos online and not-so-legally obtained Asylum and Prison footage to immediately recognize the speech patterns and tone that was echoing around her.

Apparently keeping her eyes closed was not allowed, because it was only a few seconds later that Marinette felt a harsh slap sting her cheek and whip her face to the side. Oh, that would become a bruise without a doubt. Her teeth betrayed her, cutting into the inside of her mouth with the force of the hit. So, when Marinette opened her eyes to glare at the sperm donor responsible for half of her DNA, she aimed her bloody spit right at him. It landed on his shoe, which only a few seconds later slammed into her gut.

Marinette gasped for air even as the chain she was on swung violently, making her dizzy and upsetting her stomach. Too bad she didn’t have anything in there to throw up on him, she thought angrily. The chain links rattled loudly, ringing in her head alongside the electric pain of both of her newly forming bruises.

“Honestly, is that any way to treat your dear ol’ Daddy?” Joker cooed with false offense, one hand over his heart. Marinette glared at him as best as she could as she continued to sway in the open air, the chain she was tied to being the only thing keeping her from plunging straight down into a vat of sickly green, bubbling liquid.

Marinette didn’t need to be told what that liquid was. And joker knew that, the moment he saw her look down at that vat and saw the realization almost immediately cross her face. So instead of explaining, he laughed. Loud, high, and deranged.

“Good, good! That idiot Harley kept you educated, at least,” he said between psychotic chuckles. “Ah yes, and she somehow managed to choose the perfect name,” he glided over to her, as if he was some ethereal demon of chaos instead of a human. His paper-white hand reached out, grabbing her chin in a crushing grip and turning her face this way and that. Inspecting her as if she was a piece of china and not a living being. “So easy to adjust. Right now, you’re Marinette. Just like how, all those years ago, your mother stood here as Harleen. But just as she was dunked into acid and became my harlequin,” he stepped back and grabbed Marinette’s shoulders. He spun her like a top, making the metal chain creak and clink as it wound into a few weak coils and then released back out, trying to go straight again. It sent Marinette twirling through the air in a horrid half-spin, one-eighty degrees one way before sharply spinning to the other side. Joker laughed.

“Just like that, you’re gonna go from boring old Marinette,” he stuck out his tongue like a child, as if the mere taste of her name was bitter. “And you’ll be reborn as my new little Marionette. Aren’t you excited?!”

“Fuck you,” Marinette spat, even as she tried to blink and return her vision to normal. She was far too disoriented to even come up with a plan— but she was still coherent enough to register that the sky was dark outside the high windows of the factory she was apparently in. She had been missing for a few hours then, which meant that her mom and Momma Ivy would have called for help a long time ago. Maybe if she just stalled long enough, it would get there in time. “I’m not a puppet. Not for you, not for anybody!” She snarled.

Joker rolled his eyes, but his smile still widened. “Oh, that’s what they all say. In fact, your mother put up a good resistance there for a while, but her inner chaos couldn’t resist me. You’ll bend even easier, I have no doubt,” her ran his hand along her cheek in a motion that was so gentle that it felt foreign, wrong, to her coming from him. She knew what he was doing. He was trying to whiplash her, take all her hope away before dangling the option he wanted her to choose in front of her like a carrot on a stick.

Too bad he didn’t know her at all. She cringed away from his gentle touch, revolted by the mere feel of his skin on her’s.

“And your accent is a nice touch,” he cooed as if her reaction didn’t bother him at all. It probably didn’t. “Exotic. Just the thing I need to freshen up my usual act a bit, the Boston twang my old Harlequins had is just… stale by now, don’t you agree?”

Marinette clenched her jaw at the reminder that he had tried to pass off a cheap look-alike as her mom when she disappeared, back when she was pregnant with Marinette, to hide her baby from Joker. How he had discarded that woman like trash when Harley went back to him, only to replace her again when her mom left him for good.

No matter how badly Joker spoke of her mom, Marinette knew that Harley had been the only Harlequin of his to actually last. The only one he kept around, and there was a reason for that. Now, he was looking for another replacement. One that was more than a cheap knockoff, and he was hoping that a teenager with not only Harley’s genetics, but also his own, would be the exact kind of right-hand prop he wanted. An obedient little puppet of chaos, just for him.

But Marinette was nobody's toy. She had been used and taken advantage of enough back in Paris, she had spent her whole life struggling to escape the side effects of her parentage. To deal with the things she inherited.

The obsessiveness, the way she was so quick to get attached. She knew she inherited that from her mom. But there was also the rage, the anger that Marinette constantly had to stuff down. Hide below the surface before it hurt someone. Keep under a tight reign and hide away in the back of her mind, her own dirty little secret.

The constant reminder of just who her biological father was. Because that anger, that viciousness, could only have come from him.

She had spent her whole life trying to carve herself her own identity, to create beauty with the chaotic elements she got from her blood. And she couldn’t blame her mother, not really. Her mother at least did her best to help, and always leant an empathetic ear when Marinette needed it. But Joker?

Oh, she could, and would, blame him even long after he was dead and gone. Because he was the one who hurt her mother, he was the one who twisted her and drove her to feel unfit to be a parent. And sometimes, Marinette thought it would be better if Joker never existed. Sure, that meant she never would have been born. But wouldn’t that have been easier, too? To not ever have to experience the struggle that came with being his daughter, a title she never consented to?

But she couldn’t change the past. She was alive, and she would use her life to spite everything that the Joker stood for. That would be her revenge. He wanted a toy?

Joker had been monologuing, but Marinette drowned it all out as she kept her periphery vision on the windows above her. Shadows moved out there, with familiar bright yellows and shadowy blacks. The bats were there. She just needed to stall.

She opened her mouth. Joker pulled a lever.

Marinette dropped.

Wire whizzed through the air, knocking the breath out of Marinette as it wound around her torso. She was barely able to piece together what was happening; one of the bats shot a human-safe grapple to try and pull her away from the acid.

But the chain and her restraints were stronger, heavier, and just dragged the grapple down with her body.

The impact sent a large wave of sickly green liquid surging over the side of the vat, and Marinette was dragged from view underneath the surface.

It burned.

She distantly felt the tape around her ankles peel itself away from her skin, the combination of acid and wetness rendering it useless. She felt the chemicals burning at her, sending painful tingles across every last inch of her skin. It got in her mouth, she didn’t have any breath in her to hold and ended up swallowing some. It seared her throat and created a river of lava inside her. It hurt.

It hurt so bad, she just wanted out. Out. Out. Out!

Someone pull her out now!

The zip tie around her wrist loosened enough for her to pull herself free, right as something heavy slammed into the heavy metal bowl. The entire container sloshed, slamming to fall onto its side. Marinette’s body was pulled alongside the rush of liquid as it flowed out, and she was able to breathe air again. Sweet, cooling air.

And then she hacked up acid, spitting and spewing it in an attempt to purge every last drop she had accidentally ingested. Like a cat choking on a hairball, she coughed and hacked and her chest convulsed and contracted to try and help her. Her ribs ached, she figured that the grapple that had tried to save her had ended up fracturing or breaking a rib or two. But all she cared about was breathing and getting rid of the chemicals she had inhaled. She needed it out. All of it. Out. Out. Out of her!

“Try to take a deep breath,” a gruff voice commanded, soft but solid. Something stable for her to cling to. So she did as it asked, forcing herself to stop hacking and instead focus on inhaling. As slowly as she could. It was difficult, the first few breaths cut themselves off with more involuntary coughing, but the owner of the gruff voice stayed nearby. Repeated it’s request. “Deep breath. Steady, now. In. Out. Good.”

Marinette was just starting to calm down, just starting to claw herself out of the haze of panic and adrenaline, when that wretched laugh cut through the air again.

“There you are! Heheheheh! My cute little Marionette!”

Marinette froze. She could barely think, barely understand her own emotions. But she knew she was different now. She knew there was no way back, he had taken it from her. He had taken her normality, he had taken all of her years of hard work and burned them right in front of her.

He had won. The bats hadn’t been fast enough. But, if her foggy mind was correct, Batman was the one trying to bring her back to lucidity. Batman was the one trying to help her get air back in her lungs.

Not her so-called father.

If he wanted a toy, she’d be a haunted doll. She’d harass him, haunt him, until he wanted nothing to do with her. She’d come back, like a possessed porcelain doll refusing to be thrown away. She would make him regret ever awakening the monster that she had spent so long forcing down. Because she was her father’s daughter, yes. But she was also her mother’s daughter.

And most importantly, she was Marinette Quinzel-Isley. Her own damned person. The Chosen wielder of the Creation miraculous. And she would never bow down and be used by anyone, ever again.

Tikki’s words from so long ago echoed in her mind. Resounded even louder than Joker’s laughter;

“That’s all order really is, Marinette. The decision to take all the chaos and madness around us, and make it make sense. Make it do something good.”

And wasn’t that everything Marinette had ever done? It was a part of her now. Like a tattoo she had inked into her very soul.

She took the chaos she was given, and turned it into something beautiful. And right now? Right now, the most beautiful thing she could think of was Joker’s face when she slammed her fist into it.

“Easy,” Batman repeated, but for a different reason now. Marinette’s lungs still stuttered a little, but her breathing was mostly under control. Now, he was saying it because Marinette was forcing herself to her feet. Her legs trembled under her, threatening to lay her out on the floor again. But she was every bit as stubborn as Joker, which made for a terrifying combination with her all-consuming fury. The acid had broken the mental chains Marinette had been using to hold it back, and now it burned fierce and bright in her eyes.

So Marinette kept herself up right, cognizant of Batman’s hand on her shoulder but ignoring it. She grit her teeth against the burning light of the room, everything suddenly too bright and colorful. Too vibrant. But it did little to distract her. She realized that one of her hands still gripped the heavy chain that had sent her drowning in the acid, and sent a snarl at her darling, jackass of a father as she whipped it out right towards him.

“Marinette!” Batman yelled, his grip tightening on her shoulder. But he didn’t pull her back, which spoke louder than any words he could have said to her right then. He wouldn’t save Joker from his daughter, he knew the man deserved at least this much pain. And sure enough, the metal links slammed right into Joker’s side, winding around him like a crushing whip.

But that was all Marinette had the strength to do. As soon as she saw Joker’s body hit the floor, writhing in agony and painfully loud cackles, her hand let go of the chain and her body tumbled down. Batman caught her.

“Red Hood, Nightwing, get Joker back to Arkham,” Batman’s order faded in and out of focus. Now that her most pressing desire was taken care of, the effects of the acid reared their ugly heads with renewed ferocity. Everything was too bright, too loud, and her thoughts echoed in her head like voices wrestling for supremacy. “Robin, Black Bat, stay on alert. Harley said that she’s incredibly trained,” he warned his partners. Marinette didn’t begrudge him, the only other two people who had survived being dunked into those chemicals hadn’t exactly treated him with kindness and pacifism. But she could barely focus on them anyway, too distracted by trying to reign in the chaos in her mind.

But Joker would never stay silent, even as he was dragged away in chains.

“Hehehahahahaha! Paper white, paper white!” He jeered cheerfully. “That’s my girl! Violent just like Papa!” Red hood knocked him out with a harsh punch to the side of his neck before he could say another word. But it was enough— enough for Marinette to gasp in realization.

Her skin. It was paper white, just like his. Not even Harley’s skin had been bleached like the Joker’s after her dip in the acid. That had always been makeup. Her mom had a healthy, peachy complexion like anyone else. A complexion Marinette had shared— until now. Now, she was unhealthily pale. Just like him.

A painful screech tore itself from her already raw throat, and Marinette’s fingernails immediately began to tear at her own skin. Red. Red was better than white— she didn’t want to look like him. She couldn’t. White was bad. Bad. Bad. Bad.

“Marinette! Stop!” Strong hands clamped around her wrists, pulling her hands away from herself even as she wriggled and tried to keep clawing at herself.

“No! No no no!” Marinette howled. “I don’t wanna look like him! I don’t wanna be like him!” She managed to get one hand free and immediately tried to tear away at her face. Batman was able to wrestle her arm away before she could do any damage besides a few angry red lines. “I refuse! I refuse! I refuse!” She shook her head, not feeling as tears flung themselves off her cheeks.

“Okay,” Batman’s voice was solid again, soft and grumbly and stable. She grabbed at it again, drawn to anything that might help bring her stability. She needed his unflappable attitude right then, and he probably didn’t even realize how badly. “That’s good. But you don’t need to rip your skin off to do that, you know that right?”

Marinette hiccuped, finally sinking down to sob as the weight of everything she had lost pressed down over the chaos of deafening light and blinding sound that continued to jumble around inside her head. “He changed me,” she choked out. Batman nodded even though she wasn’t looking at him.

“He did.”

“Th-that f-fucking bastard,” Marinette managed a sad chuckle before devolving right back into sobs. “I wo-worked so h-hard. N-never hurt any-anybody. Never… never yelled. Ne-never hit… Not people who didn’t attack f-first.”

“I know. Your mom told me,” he confirmed calmly. Solid, tethering. Marinette swallowed another gulp of air, trying to calm down. But everything was too much.

“Mom!” She suddenly realized out loud, turning and grabbing at Batman’s chest, clinging to his uniform. She didn’t even care that she almost sliced herself on a batarang, she clung to him desperately with wide, crazed eyes. “G-get Mom and… and Ivy! They… they can help. They know—“ Marinette paused to breathe, then resumed. “Momma Ivy— she gave me—gave me a diluted… th-thingy, years ago, I can’t remember—“ Marinette’s eyebrows furrowed as she tried to get her mind to calm down. To work.

“The serum she gave Harley?” He asked. “The one that made her immune to poisons, and gave her increased physical abilities?”

“That!” Marinette agreed frantically, nodding. “I was too— too little, to give the real thing, so she diluted it,” she swallowed her spit and winced when it burned her throat. “It… I think it’s helping with the—the—the—“

“The chemical’s effects?” Batman suddenly sounded like he was paying much more attention than before, his shoulders a little straighter at her explanation. “You think it’s slowing down or numbing what it did to your mom and Joker?” Marinette couldn’t talk anymore, it hurt too much. Everything hurt too much, so she just nodded. “Good. That’s good, Marinette. Robin! Get Harley and Ivy down here, now!”

That was when the voices started. Sometime during the ten minutes it took to get her Mom and Ivy to her, they had apparently been waiting nearby anxiously incase the Bats had needed backup, the voices had built from ominous whispers to devious shouts, ordering her to do things like slam her elbow into Batman’s throat or see what happened if she splashed Robin with some of the acid that was still on the ground.

Her body didn’t move. She kept herself carefully still, focusing on ignoring her impulse to listen to one of the voices. She was still lucid enough to know that she would regret it if she did any of that. That the Bats were more on her side than any of the voices or the Joker were. But it was growing painful, and Harley and Ivy walked in to Batman trying to keep Marinette from hitting her own head. She had devolved to trying to knock herself out to get the voices to be quiet.

“Shut up,” she hissed, her voice hoarse and gravelly. “Shut up, shut up, shut. Up!” She was clearly talking to herself, her eyes screwed shut as she continued to try and hit her head. Harley gasped, hands flying to her mouth and eyes watering at the sight. This was something she had hoped she would never see.

“Harls,” Ivy spoke softly, putting a gentle arm around her wife’s back in support. It hurt Ivy to see Marinette in so much agony, but she knew it pained Harley even more. And much more personally. “Come on. We can help.”

“Y-you’re right,” Harley agreed shakily, taking a deep breath to try and compose herself before they both approached their daughter. Batman didn’t let go of Marinette, but did lean out of the way to give them access to her.

“Honeycake?” Harley called out softly, a little unsure how the chemicals were affecting her baby’s personality right then. The first few days were going to be the worst, and she knew that. The Dunk never took it easy on it’s victims. Marinette gasped, stopping her muttering and raising her head to look at Harley with wide eyes.

“Momma?”

Harley had to swallow heavily to shove back the sob that wanted to bubble up out of her. She had to be strong for her baby. She couldn’t break yet. But Marinette hadn’t called her Momma since she was little, now she called Pamela ‘Momma Ivy’ and her just ‘Mom’.

“It’s me, sugarplum,” she assured her daughter, kneeling down and cupping one of Marinette’s cheeks in her palm. And that was when she noticed it, and couldn’t help but widen her eyes in shock. But Marinette’s senses were so sensitive that she noticed it right away, and stiffened.

“Wh-what is it?” She grew frantic when Harley didn’t immediately respond, only winced in sympathy. Marinette knew that wasn’t good. “Mom? What is it? What did he do? What else did he do to me?”

“Darling,” Harley started, licking her lips nervously. “My sweet baby girl, your right eye… it’s green now, sugar.”

Marinette’s world froze. She tried to smile, but it came out lopsided and disbelieving. “No,” she somehow managed to breathe. “No, mom, I have your eyes. Your blue eyes. I love your eyes,” Her voice steadily got more and more panicked as she went on, not wanting to accept what her mother was clearly seeing. She watched as Harley’s face broke a little, a few tears escaping before the older woman could stop them. Marinette shook her head again, slipping her tiny wrist out of Batman’s hold and raising it to her eye. “No. It’s one of his tricks. He—he must have slipped a contact in my eye when I was passed out, that’s— that’s— that’s all—“ but her fingertip met her normal eye. No contact to be felt. Marinette’s hand fell into her lap limply. The room was absolutely silent as everyone gave her a few seconds to process just how much she had been changed, entirely against her will. She opened and closed her mouth, not sure whether she wanted to yell or curse or cry. Instead, her voice just came out in a very tiny, broken:

“...fuck.”

—*—*—*—*—*

Marinette had gone mostly mute. She would say a word here or there, but for the most part she was doing a good impression of a vegetable. She stayed silent, as still as possible, and just stared at the ceiling of her hospital room.

She had been like that for the past two weeks they had been monitoring her in the Acid’s aftermath. Her ribs, which had turned out to only be bruised thankfully enough, had healed. Her cheek and torso were healed up too, only the barest hint of sickly yellow to show as a reminder of Joker’s hits on her. Sometimes the cameras would catch her talking to seemingly empty air, only for a nurse to rush in and see that Marinette had gone silent yet again.

Tikki was doing her best to help. She had been separated from Marinette, but Pamela had found Marinette’s purse and returned it— and subsequently Tikki— when they had gotten her to the hospital. She was the only person Marinette regularly spoke to, because Marinette knew Tikki understood. Tikki had been around since the Big Bang, she had seen worse things than a little insanity. Tikki had always been there to help her feel at ease with her mind and body. She shared a piece of Tikki’s soul, even, according to the tiny god.

But talking to anyone else was too hard. Too scary. She still had those damned voices at war in her mind, trying to convince her to do things that made her lock her joints and keep her body absolutely still before she acted on any of the coaxes. Possibilities she had never considered before came startlingly easy to her mind now— like how it would only take two seconds to tear her IV out and stab it into her nurse’s eye. How she could use her blanket to strangle Momma Ivy, or how she could fake jumping out the window and Harley wouldn’t waste a second trying to save her.

They were horrible thoughts. Intrusive, ugly, and far too loud. She didn’t want to act on any of them, but sometimes she found her fingers twitching only a second before she could follow through on one.

She spent a lot of time meditating, because of it. Which is why most people thought she was ignoring them. She didn’t mean to, she just needed to meditate. It was like her brain was a giant room filled with filing cabinets that held her thoughts and emotions. Her whole life, Marinette had carefully kept this room alphabetized, organized, and neat. Every file in its correct drawer. Until Joker had come along, and ripped the entire place apart. Tore certain files in half, broke her cabinets, ruined her filing system. And now she had to put the room back together, one drawer and piece of paper at a time.

That’s what the meditation was doing. She was getting reacquainted with herself. Learning what had changed in her mind and trying to adjust. She couldn’t be the old Marinette anymore, but she’d be damned if she let the Joker turn her into someone ugly like him.

So she needed time.

One day, towards the end of those two weeks, she got a visitor slipping through her window. Considering her room was on the tenth floor, she had it pretty narrowed down as to who it could be. Batman had visited her every night, a silent shadow in the corner, but he had already left for the day so it couldn’t be him. None of the other bats had dropped by after the second day.

She turned her head to see that that was now changed; Red Hood sat on her windowsill with one leg inside the room and the other bent on the sill itself. He looked the very picture of comfort despite being a stiff wind (or quick shove— no, bad brain) away from falling to his death. And then Hood took off his helmet, which was ugly enough to inspire some of the more violent suggestions in her brain and make them seem appealing.

“Ya know. Red Hood used to be what Joker called himself,” were the first words out of the vigilante’s mouth. Marinette’s eyebrows pulled down, and it was clear she was confused (and a little angry) at what he told her. He grinned, his eyes still hidden by the domino mask on his face. “Eh. The bastard killed me, ya know. I was the second Robin, a lifetime ago.”

Marinette’s eyes widened at that, and the violent voices dimmed and seemed to grow muffled. Marinette couldn’t quite understand what they were trying to tell her anymore, which made her figure that she had better pay attention to what Hood had to say. She licked her dry lips, and spoke softly. Her throat was still damaged from the acid, so she couldn’t speak very loudly yet.

“Then how are you… you know, here?”

The man chuckled. “Another group of assholes happens to have a magic pit in their basement. It’s a glowing green lake, ten different types of bad news. But it brings people back to life, and they dunked me in it without even caring for a second if I even wanted to come back.”

Marinette’s shoulders relaxed all on their own. It seemed to sink into her brain all at once, a simple:

Oh. He gets it.

“I guess the water doesn’t take it easy on your brain, either?” She hazarded an educated guess. He laughed, shaking his head.

“Not at all. I went off the deep end for a while, and killed a lotta people. They deserved it at least, but I don’t like how violent I was back then. Before I learned how to cope. Attacked people who were innocent. Red Robin almost died when I attacked him, back then, when he was just Robin.”

“Then why’d you keep calling yourself Red Hood?” She asked, tilting her head. He finally turned his head to look straight at her instead of just staring out the window. His grin widened, but it was lopsided. The grin of someone who was healed from some serious shit, but knew that it would always ache. A bittersweet expression.

“Cuz he doesn’t own that name. I made it into something that stands for at least a little good. Something that scares the assholes who don’t care about killing or abusing innocent people. Hell, some people take comfort in the name Red Hood now. And you know what that means?”

Marinette shook her head, and his grin widened into a shark-like smile.

“It means I stole it from him. The name Red Hood. He’ll never use it again, and now it stands for the opposite of anything he’d agree with. You can do that too, you know. Find something to steal from him, or use something he gave you, and make it your own.”

“Turn the chaos into something good,” Marinette said dreamily, clearly quoting someone. Red Hood nodded.

“Exactly. It’s not gonna be easy, but you got the choice here. You ain’t going back to who you used to be, but you can take the victory away from him.”

“... make him regret ever dunking me in that stupid vat,” she agreed, narrowing her eyes as they filled with determination for the first time since her body hit the acid. “He wants a puppet, an obedient little doll, I’ll give him Annabel.”

“There ya go,” The vigilante slid off the windowsill and approached her bed, holding out his hand for a shake. “I can help you get to that. What do ya say?”

Marinette was silent for a long minute, staring straight into his masked eyes. And then, a slow smile spread over her lips. “I got one question, Red Hood.”

“Shoot.”

“How do you feel about black cats?”

—*—*—*—*—*

This took four hours, holy hell. I’m actually happy with how this turned out. What do you guys think? I even got to max length on Tumblr 😂

[blookmallow]

Can you do a rating on child animatronics like you did with the clowns

i sure can

welcome to animatronic nightmare preschool

theres a trend ive discussed about spirit before where all their female animatronics tend to be either the “old hag” type, or “creepy little girl” - and now that im thinking about it i actually couldn’t think of any boy characters ive ever seen. i dont know why this is exactly. theres something to analyze there but im not really sure what it is. i found a few but almost ALL of them are little girls. i dont know what to say about this but i did notice it 

there IS a boy in this group though: 

ring around the rosie

enter the ritual 

just some nice kids having a fun time. it may be cliché at this point but i love the “spooky nursery rhyme” trope anyway (and y’know, ring around the rosie was already creepy to begin with. im not sure if the theory that it’s really about the black plague is actually true but its still highly questionable to include the line “ashes, ashes, we all fall down” in a childrens rhyme with no explanation either way) 

for some reason the fact that none of them have hands and its just their sleeves tied together is really funny to me and i dont know why. they also dont have feet and im not sure if its a technical limitation for convenience purposes or if they’re supposed to be little ghost children but it definitely comes across like they’re little ghost children who tied their sleeves together to try to feel like they’re holding hands which is very cute. 10/10 big fan of this one 

i already mentioned harriet hustle in this post, shes fantastic 

angeline

i LOVE this one shes SO cute

i dont really understand how she's supposed to be scary, the description is like "she'll scare the lights out of your guests" or w/e but like, she's just. a kid who can see ghosts. she herself isn't even a ghost. i like her id adopt her i think she'd be a fun addition to a graveyard scene 10/10

abandoned annie

ok technically this one is a doll but im counting her anyway, shes one of my FAVORITE spirit animatronics bc A) i love creepy dolls B) shes cute and most importantly C) her entire fucking face unhinges i need y’all to watch the video on this one its so good 12/10 ive said this before but animatronics that do something completely fucking unexpected are my absolute favorite 

broken girl 

completely batshit. horrifying. shes actually initially standing upright and then snaps backward and screams and the image does not do it justice i highly recommend the video for this one. not much there as a Character but as “really effective way to scare the shit out of someone” its, i would imagine, incredibly effective. 9/10

there’s also menacing molly who looks similar and has the same kind of “facing away from you but then snaps backward” scare but is on a swing and sings “I see dead people, I see ghosts 💖i see the things that hate you the most” before she does her jumpscare which is incredibly funny to me 

double trouble

creepy little girl trope meets creepy twins trope, at first glance i thought this was just like, discount grady twins (which it looks like they also have, in blatant knockoff form. they’re uh, not good) but it looks like their description backstory is that they killed their mother and disappeared with their rumored-insane father so its slightly different. one of their phrases is “daddy says we have to play outside :( he doesnt want any more blood on the floor” and i love it 

they have a pretty good sense of personality and character to them even if its not necessarily groundbreaking. 7/10

ellie hatchet 

i love this one bc so many of the creepy little girl animatronics are just pretty much standing there being creepy but not ellie. she’s fucking DONE with all of you. you come near her she will swing an axe at your face. 6/10 not really a big stand out but i appreciate her undying rage 

lunging lily 

shes spooky. she jumps out at you. thats about it. i dont really have anything to say about this one. that sure is a creepy little girl that jumpscares you. i like that she goes “help me... help me...” before she jumps out but i feel like it would be hard to get the timing right for that to actually work as a lure to make guests curious where the sound’s coming from since most of these are motion activated. anyway 6/10 shes just not very interesting 

johnny punk 

one of the rare boy characters, i have actually seen him in store and just completely forgot about him because he was that uninteresting. he doesn’t really do much and his backstory on site is just like, “He's got a nice house, loving parents and a severe attitude problem.” 

like this isn’t an undead child back for revenge against those who wronged him or a crazed circus runaway or anything. he’s just a bratty kid. hes like a 13 year old who just saw Joker and has decided to make it his entire personality. this comes across less as a threatening figure and more just like some shitty kid who thinks he’s cool. i glanced at the comments on the wiki page and it turns out absolutely everyone hates him which is completely hilarious to me 

2/10 nobody likes you johnny go do your homework and apologize to your mother 

i also found limb eating zombie boy, who is considerably better 

gross. bloody. would probably be pretty effective if you had him like, placed among some boxes or something so people dont see him at first and aren’t expecting him there. pretty standard zombie. i dont have much to say. He’s Fine. 6/10

mommy’s favorite

ive seen this one in the stores several times, I think we have her there now, and i just don’t. get it? she just moves back and forth with the “shhh” gesture and it’s like, ok, she’s vaguely creepy, but what’s going on here. she just says “don’t wake my mommy! she’s been sleeping for a long time!” so i guess the implication is that her mother is dead and she doesn’t understand, which is just sad rather than scary. the description says she makes mommy’s tea just how she likes it with five drops from the special skull bottle, which could imply she killed her mom, which would make more sense as a horror character, but if that’s How Mommy Likes It that implies the mother instructed her daughter to unknowingly poison her, which is horrifying but in a way darker sense than a spooky halloween prop lmfao 

anyway if i have to go digging into descriptions to try to figure out what this character is or what shes supposed to be or anything i just dont feel like its a very effective character design. and i did read it and i still dont really get it. 2/10 i just feel like im missing something here 

anyway there’s a bunch more variations of “scary possessed child” that are all basically the same, so im just gonna close this out with:

swinging skeletal boy 

allo there, guvna 

look at this dapper little victorian child im gonna cry he’s so cute 

he just swings but has this surprisingly endearing soft little voice which COMPLETELY contrasts the weird shit he actually says. hes this precious little skeleton kid with a sweet little voice who goes “your skin is so nice :) can i have it? haha. that’s okay. I’ll take it when you’re sleeping” 

absolutely love animatronics with that “wait WHAT did that thing just say” factor to them i love this guy 11/10 good boy my new son 

i would also like to mention that people are also continuing to dunk on johnny punk in this guy’s comment section too fsadkflj people hate that shitty joker kid so much their hatred has bled into other completely unrelated swinging children

[readingbatfamficsat3am]

Universe Jumping  #1

Jason wasn’t entirely sure how he ended up in New York. Especially New York on a whole other fucking earth.  Lying on the ground in a dark alley, on top of what he was pretty sure was human shit, all he remembered was blood and Bruce and a blinding light that convinced him he was dying -- again. 

There was a batarang slicing through his jugular, pain blinding his vision. It wasn’t anything new, pain. Jason Todd had been well familiar to pain by the time he was ten years old. Of course there had been more after Bruce found him but he hadn’t minded that pain, he was saving people. But then there was his strongest memory of pain. It was the reason he was in that abandoned apartment, fighting Bruce and trying to ignore Joker’s hysteric laughter, despite having a gun to his head. 

 Jason slumped down against a wall, held a hand to his neck, and decided he was done. They were all done. Pulling the switch from his back pocket, he closed his eyes. He was okay with dying again. He couldn’t remember what death had been like but knew it was a lot less painful than life, atleast one like the one he had lived. Jason only prayed that wherever he was it was far away from both Bruce and the clown. Maybe he’d see his mom, Catherine, not Sheila. Jason pushed the button and smiled to himself, a small grin that Bruce couldn’t see while brawling with the Joker. 

But trust Bruce Wayne to fuck up Jason’s plans even further. He was too tired to fight when Bruce grabbed his shirt, pulling him as far from the bomb as he could in the five seconds they had left.  

The explosion caused Bruce to let his shirt go. Let him go. Jason found a sudden burst of adrenaline and ran, as fast as his legs would allow. Wally West would be proud. Rubble was falling around him which he avoid with one hand putting pressure on his throat. That was when the light appeared, and suddenly he didn’t want die. It was incredibly fucking annoying how often he changed his mind, Dick and the Titans had teased him about it relentlessly. No, don’t think about them.  The light surrounded Jason and suddenly it was all he could see. And then everything went dark. 

This all lead to him lying in an alleyway. One glance at the busy streets beyond told him everything he needed to know. 

#1 He was in New York (The Empire State building had been a pretty big tell)

#2 He was on a different earth (Half the billboards around him boasted footage of the Justice League knockoffs known as the Avengers saving the city from aliens)

He could get up, whatever had brought him here had also healed his wound so he could really go anywhere he wanted, it being a completely new earth and all, but Jason didn’t care anymore. He’d devoted the last five years of his life to plotting and training his revenge against Bruce, Joker, Gotham, for making him who he was, for killing a fifteen year old boy and forgetting it ever happened. And he’d failed. 

All his work and anger had resulted in nothing but a nasty scar along the side of his throat. 

The thing that brought him here can’t have done it quietly. Jason was sure it had caused some electrical surge or radiation increase, something that was bound to bring in the resident shady government agents in their crisp black suits, dark shades and complicated words. Maybe he’d even get to meet the Avengers. Dick would have a heart attack if he met the redhead, Roy would start an archery competition with the Green Arrow wannabe and Rose and Rachel would probably see who could make the walking American flag piss himself first. 

Jason’s heart hurt when he thought about the Titans. Dick was his brother, Roy had been his best friend and Jason had been beginning to want something more with him, but he guessed nothing was ever going to there now. Rose and he had broken up about two months before Ethiopia so he’d had time at least, to move on before being forced into a coffin and then a Lazarus pit. 

The alley stank. Full of urine, trash and rodents it reminded him of the Narrows, of Crime Alley. But nothing in New York could ever truly compare to the horror that is Crime Alley. Jason new without looking up that the suits had arrived. He opened his eyes to find an oldish man peering down at him. 

“Good afternoon. I’m agent Phil Coulson.” 

Jason didn’t reply. He supposed he should be worried about being taken to some super secret base that was supposed to make people like him shake in their boots, but Phil didn’t look all that scary or like anything Jason couldn’t handle. 

“Can I help you? Would you mind moving a bit to the left, you’re blocking the sunlight,” he paused and grinned, “I’m trying to get a bit of tan, I’m from Gotham you see, and the only light you’d get over there is from the batsignal.” 

Coulson frowned at him, taking in the body armor, guns, knives and scars before crouching down to Jason’s level. “Sir, I’m going to need you to come with me,” he gestured to another suit, who was pointing a weird device at him, “we are reading a high level of molecular energy coming from your body and need to get you quarantined immediately.” 

Jason sat up and offered Coulson his hands, “Well Phil, I’ve got nothing better to do. It’s Jason, by the way.”

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #704: Preparing for the Beauty Pageant (Persona 5 X SSBU)

3:54 p.m. at Shiyuba, Haru's Residence.......

Pit/Dark Pit: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Shiho: (Trying her Hardest Not to Burst Out in Laughter at What is in Front if Her)

Ryuji: (Has Deadpinned Look on.his Face While Wearing Pigtails and School Uniform That Almost Resembles the Same Style Ann is Wearing Beside Him)...........................This was a mistake.......

Ann: (Smiles Proudly While Wrapping her Arm Around his Shoulder) Oh don't be like that, Ryuji. You look great! We're practically like my Siamese twins already~

DarK Pit: (Puts on a Smug Smirk on his Face) ('Heh') Yeah. Expect he's more muscular and stupid looking than any twin I see. (Continues Laughing Some More)

Ryuji: (Glares at the Dark Angel) S-Shuddup, man! You guys can laugh all you want, but at least I'm man enough to do this kind of shit!

Shiho: (Smiles Softly) Ryuji, we were only laughing with you, not at you. You look amazing.

Pit: (Smiles Brightly) Yeah. I really like your pigtails. It matches great with your outfit.

Haru: (Smiles Brightly) You and Ann look so beautiful together that I honestly couldn't tell either of you apart~

Ryuji: ('Sigh') Thanks, guys. (Glares Back at Dark Pit) At least you three appreciate my looks!

Dark Pit: (Rolls his Eyes) Whatever man. You still look dumb.

Makoto: (Glares at Dark Pit) Pitto!

Dark Pit: What? I'm just saying.

'Room Door Opens'

Futuba: We're doooone!~

Lavenza: And on a perfect schedule as well!

Morgana: You guys might wanna see this!

The gang turn and see Yusuke walking to the living room wearing a red kunoichi like uniform, with a beautifully long ponytail.

Yusuke: How do I look?

Ann: (Eyes Widened in Genuine Surprised) Wooooow, Yusuke..... You look amazing!~

Ryuji: (Smiles Brightly) Yeah, man! You look like badass ninja girl!

'Ahem'

Ryuji turns to see Lavenza giving him a very unimpressed look on her face.

Lavenza: He is known as a proper kunoichi. (Glares Intensely at Ryuji) You uncultured swan.

Ryuji: (Eyes and Mouth Widened in Complete Disbelief at the Sudden Burn Lavenza Given Him)

Futuba: Awwwww!~ She's already learning what I taught her. I'm so proud~

Morgana: (Sighs While Facepalming Himself)

Makoto: (Rolled her Eyes a Little) Questionable teaching methods aside.....(Smiles Softly) You look great, Yusuke.

Haru: (Smiles Brightly) I agree wholeheartedly. What makes you want to become a kunoichi in the first place.

Yusuke: It was all Futuba's idea, of course. She has shown the design of this outfit a day before then and convinced me to wear for the tonight's beauty pageant. (Smiles a Little). Needless to say, I believe the outcome in all of this itself has become somewhat impressive. (Turns to Futuba) Thanks to you, of course.

Futuba: (Gives Yusuke a Bright Smile and a Thumbs Up) Anytime, Inari!~ You look like a badass already!..... That's a good thing.

Yusuke: (Simply Nodded) Ah. I see. Thank you.

Dark Pit: Yeah. (Went Back to Smirking Again) You look a million times better than Ann's knockoff twin over there, that's for sure.

Pit: (Starts Chuckling Lightly at Dark Pit's Insult to Ryuji) Knockoff twin!~

Makoto: (Sisterly Glares at the Two Angels). That's enough, you two!

Pit: (Immediately Stops Laughing)

Makoto: You promise me and all of your mothers that you two would behave yourselves once you step foot in our world.

Haru: (Gives the Duo Motherly Yet Disappointed Frown) That's right. What would your mothers think if they were to find out that either of you broke that promise?

Ann: Makoto and Haru are right, you guys. (Have her Arm Around Ryuji's Shoulder Again) Don't make fun of my knockoff twin like that!

Makoto/Haru: Ann!

Ann: Okay! Okay! I was only joking here! Really. (Turns Back to The Angel Duo) But seriously, you know what we're saying here, right?

Pit: (Immediately Feels Bad For What He (May Have) Done) Yeah.....(Turns to Ryuji) We're sorry, Ryuji....

Dark Pit: ('Sighs in Defeat') Yeah....We didn't mean to make fun of you or anything......

Ryuji: Eh. It's fine. Should've saw the insults coming the moment I put on this get-up. (Chuckles Lightly) Hopefully I won't look bad as Renny boy would be.

Haru: Speaking of which, what is taking Ren-Ren so long to getting ready?

Makoto: I'm not sure.....(Gets Up from the Couch) Maybe I should go check on-

'Music Starts to Play'

?????: HOT IN....

Ann: Did.... someone turn on the radio or.......

?????: SO HOT IN HERRE!

Haru: I don't think I ever own a radio in the house.

?????: SO HOT IN......

Ann: So where the heck the music is coming fro-

'DOOR PUSHED OPEN'

Everyone immediately turns to the sound of an opened door. Only to see.....

Ren: (In a Feminine Voice) I'm ready~

Ren Amimaya fashionably walk towards the living room, wearing a black leather police uniform with, high heels, a policemen hat, and black cherry colored lipstick on his lips.

Pit/Dark Pit: (Eyes Widened and Jaws Dropped to the Ground in Complete and Utter Shock at What's in Front of Them)

Ann/Shiho: Oh.....

Haru: My......

Ryuji: Freaking........

Futuba: God..........

Yusuke: Huh. Interesting....

Lavenza: Indeed.

Morgana: (Eyes Widened Along with Everyone Else in this Room) Wow.

Makoto: (Eyes Widened in Genuine Shock as Deep Crimson Blush Appears on her Cheek) R-R-R-Ren!?~

Ren: (Giggles Softly While Gently Holding up Makoto's Hand) Yes, my beautiful lovely Queen?~ (Kiss the Top of Makoto's Hand)

Makoto: (Immediately Pulls her Kissed Hand Away While Blushing Even More Bashfully) Ohhhhmygosh!~ W-W-What are you wearing?~

Ren: (Chuckles Lightly) Police outfit. I thought I could try and blow the crowd away a little. (Went Back to his Seductive Feminine) You guys like?~ (Begins to Wink at his Group of Friends)

Ann: (Already Blushing Herself) Ren....You can't do this to me! (points.at Shiho Over Dramatically) My girlfriend is LITERALLY standing right here!!!

Shiho: (Blushes While Staring at Ren at the Same Time) O-Oh gosh~......

Ann: ('GASPS') SHIHO-KINS!!~

Shiho: I'M SORRY!!~ I can't help it!~ He just.....looks sooooooo hot as a girl right now!!~

Ann: ('Sighs in Utter Defeat') Yeah...... I'm not even going to deny that fact. He's too hot for his own good.......

Ryuji: (Takes a Deep Breath Before Speaking) WELP.......So much for hoping that you would be the laughing stock at school with me, bro. Bet you're gonna win that contest with flying colors too.

Ren: Why, Ryuji~ I am soooo thankful and humble that you have soooo much faith in me-

Ryuji: (Immediately Facepalms Himself) Dude! Just.....('Sigh') Enough with the voice already.....

Ren: (Starts Chuckling Again) Alright. Alright. I'll stop already. But.... seriously though. What do you guys think? Too much?

Haru: (Smiles Brightly) Not at all, Ren-Ren. You look wonderful~

Pit: (Smiles Brightly) Yeah. You rock that dress, Big Bro!

Dark Pit: Can't believe I'm saying this....But Pit-Stain is right. (Smiles a Little) You look great.

Lavenza: (Smiles Brightly) I agree to this statement. You look magnificent, Joker.

Yusuke: (Smiles in an Impressed Manner) Very much so.

Morgana: (Smiles While Shrugging) I can agree to that.

Futuba: (Smiles Softly) Yeah. Not as badass looking as Inari though....

Ann: We love it, Ren-Ren. (Smirks Playfully) And I'm pretty sure that a certain "Queen" in this would say the same~ Right, Makoto?~

Makoto: (Sighs Heavily as She Takes her Hands Away from her Face) Yes......I would. (Smiles Softly) You look amazing, Ren-Ren. (Gives Ren a Loving Hug) And I'm so proud of you for doing this~

Ren: (Softly Smiles While Hugging Makoto Back) Thanks, 'hon. And don't worry. I won't let the audience take me away from you that easily.

Makoto: (Gives Ren a (Cute) Pouty Face) You better not!~ Cause you're mine and mines alone, mister!~

Ryuji: (Starts Snickering) Already getting jealous there, Queen?

Makoto: (Immediately Gives Ryuji a Piercing Glare) SHUT IT, KNOCKOFF ANN!!!

Ryuji: (Eyes and Mouth Widened in Complete Disbelief Again Before Slumping Down on the Floor)

Dark Pit/Pit/Futuba: (Burst Out Laughing at Ryuji's Blantent Dispense) AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Ann/Shiho/Haru: (Starts Snickering at the Poor Man)

Ren: (Chuckles Lightly) Knockoff Ann aside, you really don't have anything to worry about here.

Makoto: ('Sigh') I know...(Smiles Softly at her Boyfriend) I love you, Ren-Ren~

Ren: (Smiles Softly) Love you too, Makoto~ (Gives Makoto a Loving Kiss on the Lips)

Makoto: (Giggles Softly) I love your lipstick color~ It suits you fairly well.

Ren: Thanks. Love yours too~

@princekirijo

@keyenuta

@26shann

@caleb13frede

@ma-lemons

@supergamemaster64

@albion-93

@toriwest

@chompycroc

[adamwatchesmovies]

Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (2020)

Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of one Harley Quinn) - or simply Birds of Prey - radiates attitude and style. It’s lively and energetic with hearty laughs and surprisingly good action scenes throughout. I know the trailers filled you with uncertainty but the end results is a barrel of fun. Best of all, it's self-contained. You don't need to have liked or even seen "Suicide Squad" to appreciate it.

After the Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie) is dumped by the Joker, she decides to make her own mark on the world. Unfortunately, she has many enemies and without the Clown Prince of Crime’s protection, she’s become the target of Roman "Black Mask" Sionis (Ewan McGregor). As she attempts to regain his favor, Harley runs into several other women, all of whom also have a bone to pick with the gangster.

Birds of Prey sets up the mood and lets you know what kind of movie you’re in right away through… an animated sequence. From there, things get even crazier. Quinn narrates the adventure, frequently interrupting herself to go rewind and tell us how Cassandra Cain (Ella Jay Basco), Dinah Lance/Black Canary (Jurnee Smollet-Bell), Police Detective Renee Montoya (Rosie Perez) or the mysterious Huntress (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) wound up crossing paths with her. Her inner monologue means a lot of humor (which is hit-and-miss at first but picks up speed as it goes on) and a smooth feed for us. When you take a step back, this plot may not be deep, but it is complicated. There are a half-dozen characters all moving through Gotham City for reasons all their own and you’re never lost. It’s a great screenplay by Christina Hodson. What she does with Huntress, in particular, is hilarious.

Margot Robbie is all over this movie because Quinn's adventure is what kicks off the creation of the female superhero team the movie gets its title from. You won’t complain ‘cause she’s having a great time in the role and so are you. Same with Ewan McGregor. You never quite know where to place him on the sanity scale. He’s appropriately menacing when he needs to be but not so grim and gritty that he doesn’t fit in this candy-coated, violent action movie. There are a lot of “Oooooh!” Moments from all of the brutal leg injuries suffered throughout and the second you've recovered, director Cathy Yan hits you with an action scene. I didn’t expect it going in, but Birds of Prey has the best baseball-bat fight since The Raid 2. Whenever there’s combat, it’s well shot, dynamic and creative.

I was cautious walking into Birds of Prey. It initially seemed like a knockoff of Deadpool. At the end of the day, I like this story better because it's more than just a riff on a familiar story. Even without the razzle-dazzle presentation, it's something new. From the intro to the post-credit bonus, "Birds of Prey" stands out. (Theatrical version on the big screen, February 5, 2020)

[fangsjustice]

(brashenheart) Walks up to Linus wearing a total knockoff of his Look (tm) except with like 5 inches on him like Hey pal wanna thrown down ouo

“…What the fuck sorta clown get-up are you struttin’ around in, pal?” Linus scoffed, immediately annoyed that this garishly clad joker had the balls to be taller than him. “You look like a moron, and an easy fuckin’ target.”

you’re not even good enough to be my fake

[cogentranting]

So while we're on the topic, how would you feel about an Arrowverse version of Batman being introduced?

They shouldn’t touch Batman. At all. Supergirl can make little nods to Gotham but that’s as close as they should get. Two reasons: 

1. Too many Batman’s and too much pressure. Batman has been done A LOT and with a great deal of acclaim. Everyone has a favorite Batman and throwing your hat into that ring is risky. Especially when you’re going to be compared with Christian Bale and Affleck- because most people love at least one of those and they’re big shoes to fill. Even Lego Batman leaves big shoes. There’s too much for an Arrowverse version to be compared to for it to really be successful. (They also shouldn’t touch Joker because it will be years before any performance isn’t completely overshadowed by Ledger). 

2. The Arrowverse already has a Batman. It’s Oliver. And I don’t mean that in a negative, “Oliver is just a green knockoff Batman” way. Never. Oliver is his own unique wonderful character. But he is playing the role of Batman within the Arrowverse- he’s the cowl. He’s the dark, gritty, non-powered, skill-based, warrior character who serves as a leader for all the other superheroes alongside the Cape- the lighter, happier, more friendly, incredibly powered superhuman, Barry. So bringing Batman in would really just serve to bring someone to do the job that Oliver is already doing. And it would undermine what the Arrowverse has actually done really well with in it’s creation of four very distinct shows (soon to be five-ish since Black Lightning is  technically Arrowverse adjacent)

I’d be fine with including the Batkids except that the Batkids kind of presuppose Batman’s existence so we run into that problem. 

(Oh and for the record, Oliver in the Batman role, Barry in the Superman role, means Kara in the Wonderwoman role)

[hellyeahheroes]

Cleansing the Crimes of Old Krypton: Comparisons Between Superman #1-6 and Supergirl #1-6

Ever since the rise of the comic-book anti-heroes, Superman and his family were positioned by writers in the opposition to them. This is a natural progression for those who understand the character’s roots as the hero of the little folk. Such qualities are resonating with the liberal and socialist ideals. Meanwhile, antiheroes often voice ideas that would be very terrifying if said by real-life politicians. The efficiency being presented as more important than human rights or collateral damage. The idea that the justice system only stops the protagonist from doing what’s necessary. An approach where stopping the bad guys is more important than protecting the innocent. These ideas can easily be applied to politics. And as a result, lead to authoritarian or outright fascist thinking. Don’t get me wrong. Some people claim if Batman won’t kill the Joker, he has the blood of Joker’s future victims on his hands. I’m not saying they’re cheering Donald Trump saying federal judges who overruled his ban on Muslim Immigrants are to blame if a terrorist attack happens. But we need to recognize the parallels.

Many successful antihero stories were built on exploring the consequences of this approach. You can find those themes everywhere from The Authority and V for Vendetta to Code Geass. Sadly, lately, we have a continuous increase of those problems being glossed over. And not only for actual antiheroes but even more upstanding characters. Especially in movies. Once paragons of virtue on big screen become terrifying. And yet we're supposed to cheer when they commit atrocities. Violating borders of a foreign country, intruding on people’s privacy, destroying an entire city in battle, murdering people. It all becomes not only justified but even glorified. They say it’s okay for “good guys” to do those things. Because otherwise, we’re all going to die. Because they’ll stop once the danger is gone, pinky swear. Because only the bad guys get hurt and killed. So relax and handle all the power and no accountability to those guys, they need it to protect you.

Superman stories often tackled this issue. Sometimes results is a compelling, meaningful voice in the discussion. Other times we get an awful, hypocritical story. That is given praise regardless because it sticks it up to the other side. “What’s So Funny About Truth, Justice And American Way” and it’s adaptation “Superman vs the Elite” are a prime example. There Superman proves wrong the Authority knockoffs who claim that might makes right. By beating the living shit out of them, thus proving that might do indeed makes right…. if you’re Superman. Thankfully, two stories I want to talk about do not have this problem.

For inspirations, both stories reach back. To a tale of 4 individuals that tried to replace Superman after his supposed death - Reign of Supermen. Superman books under Rebirth banner, in general, try to recreate the feel of that era. Superman is dead and his replacements start showing up. Kenan Kong in the New Super-Man, Lana Lang in Superwoman, even Lex Luthor dons the cape. But DC managed to have their cake and eat it too. The main Superman book still has it's Man of Steel. It's Superman from another Universe, with wife and son. He is more in line with old DC Continuity, compared to Superman that died. Meanwhile, Supergirl reaches to feel more like beloved TV Series, even if Kara is still a teenager. To connect with Reign of Supermen both books use a different way. They reach for its “bad” Supermen - Eradicator and Cyborg Superman. They also revamp them to have them fit a specific purpose.

Or use earlier revamps, as is the case with Cyborg Superman. Before Flashpoint this name was held by Hank Henshaw, a scientist with a grudge. In New 52 he is the man who had sent Kara to Earth from Argo, last surviving city of Krypton. Her father, Zor-El. He failed to save the whole colony and is desperate to undo past failures. He turns dead corpses of his citizens and even wife into cyborgs like him. But to regain sentience the need to consume life force of intelligent beings. Then Zor-El hears Kara cry in her moment of doubt. She question she’ll even be able to fit on Earth and how strange and, well, alien, our customs are for her. Her father doesn’t hesitate. He decides to invade Earth, harvest humanity to resurrect Argo and take his daughter back.

Eradicator was absent from New 52 era of DC, to resurface in Rebirth, with a simplified origin. Before Flashpoint it was an alien A.I. obsessed over Krypton. In Rebirth Eradicators were created by General Zod. It was a mechanical police force used against both criminals and political rivals. This one came back to life through contact with the blood of Superman’s son, Jonathan. And then vowed to protect and restore Krypton’s legacy. Starting with the last heir of House of El, Superman himself. Clark is reluctant to trust the robot when it offers to examine Jon’s health and fluctuating powers. Turns out it was a good call. Eradicator decides that being half-human half-Kryptonian, Jon is impure. And that the best way to heal him is to eradicate human part of his DNA. Jon would become fully Kryptonian, but also cease to exist as a person he was up to this point.

Both those villains have a history of representing darker shades of Krypton. In old continuity, Eradicator was a go-to explanation for every Krypton-related bad thing. Villainous interpretation of Zor-El is nothing new either. Before Flashpoint his whole motivation was "He hates his brother, Jor-El". He didn't send Kara away to save her, but to make her kill Kal-El. He had brainwashed his own daughter to make her a weapon against her cousin.

If anything, this version of him comes off as, if not sympathetic, then at least pitiable. Flashbacks show us he was a caring, loving father, who sent Kara away to protect her. It makes it much more tragic to see how far he has fallen. Even Kara starts to feel bad for him over the course of the story. She recognizes in him a man haunted by his failures, whose actions are a desperate try to fix everything. But Supergirl still calls him out. She points out that he doesn't care about anything but himself anymore. If he did, he’d see how twisted his “solution” actually is and try to find a better one. The results were more important than how he achieved them. And things like mass murder became merely means to an end. It doesn't matter how many he has to kill. It doesn't matter he turned his wife and friends into mechanical monsters. Once he gets them back, everything will be back to normal, he tells himself. He expects his wife and daughter to go back to their old life and ignore all the blood on his hands. He is delusional. When his wife regains part of her mind, she sacrifices herself to save Kara's adoptive mother. She'd rather be dead than part of this. Does it get to him? No. because for Zor-El it doesn't matter how appalling his methods are. Only that he wins.

Both Zor-El and Eradicator are operating on racist and xenophobic assumptions. They see everyone who is not Kryptonian as inferior and disposable. The whole idea of a Kryptonian living with human family is appalling to them. Zor-El several times states he never meant for Kara to stay on Earth forever. He expects her to simply abandon her new home, now that it served its purpose. He also mentions in passing wars betweenKrypton and other races. It's implied they were as horrible as what he is doing now. Meanwhile, what is Eradicator? A Kryptonian version of police brutality and law-enforcement being used for political reasons. All these factors make the reader ask a question neither of the villains bothered with. Should you bring old Krypton back? If Kryptonians were warmongering xenophobes, then why should they return? Who is to say if they do, they won’t go down the same path again? Neither Eradicator nor Zor-El makes a strong case against this argument. Not when they’re willing to stomp into the ground anyone who stands in their way.

We live in times when people in power tell us we need to give up parts of our freedoms for our own protection. That we need to do whatever it takes, no matter how unethical, to protect our way of life from “the enemy”. Even if it means crushing rights of those different from us. This is no different from many anti-heroes in comics. How often do we see one accusing more restrained superheroes of not having what it takes to “get the job done”? Or claim not only are they too weak, but people they protect are dumb masses easy to sway and control? Those themes are still being explored by creators of both books. Peter Tomasi and Patrick Gleason do it through later Superman villain, the Prophecy. Lord Havok and the Extremists serve this role in Steve Orlando’s JLA. But it isn’t enough to have heroes beat this type of villains. What is even more important is how they beat them. As I mentioned above, in that kind of stories it’s easy to come off as a hypocrite, if you play your hand wrong.

Luckily, even on that ground, the stories are on point. Neither Superman nor Supergirl can defeat their enemies alone. It is the strength of family, friends, and allies that allow them to overcome this threat. As Kara says, she isn’t on Earth to inspire humans – they inspire each other. Threat Eradicator and Zor-El present cannot be defeated by an individual. It needs the united effort of everyone it threatens. Even average people like Cat Grant or Bibbo Bibbowski have their part to play. It’s love, family, and unity that save the day.

And in true classic fashion, they are both shown mercy. While Eradicator’s physical form is destroyed, Superman’s very aware that’s not enough to kill him. Meanwhile, Cyborg Superman ends immobilized and imprisoned. The story ends with Kara hoping to find a way to save her father. If you follow solicits you know they’ll both be back in May’s Action Comics. Some might complain about the never-ending nature of superhero comics. How no victory is ever meaningful because the villain will come back. It’s one of the major problems raised by supporters of the antiheroes. But looking at those villains a metaphor for fascist tendencies, it works. Fascism can be beaten, but it cannot be killed. It will always find a way to creep back under a different name. The weakness of anti-hero stories lies in them giving the reader a fake sense of finality. They tell us we have to do whatever it takes, even if it’s immoral and unethical, to win against the evil. That once we beat it, it’s gone and we can go back to normal. But that’s not true. Evil is forever and it will keep coming at you in new forms. We can see it in today’s world as well. Not so long ago many folks would say fascism died when WWII was over. Allies victory over this evil was final and definite. The questionable choices made by them like bombing civilian cities, were justified because fascism is now dead. Once put down it will never rise to power again. And then Richard Spencer and Steve Bannon started making the news…..

The purpose of this text is not to bash on fans of the antihero characters. But when working with them it's important to show their questionable aspects. Otherwise, they can become propaganda tools for the worst kind of people.