#every problem has a solution
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You have to choose, Aleida. You have to decide what you want your life to be.
#margo madison#aleida rosales#for all mankind#never let it be said that ms madison doesn't practice what she preaches#every problem has a solution#and she will find it#or die trying#“hi tatiana the kgb probably sent you but i don't give a fuck because we're friends now”#happy this was supposed to be for margo monday but no one's as out of touch as me thursday
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Jack: I want to watch the procedure
Juliet: And how are you going to do that with my hand holding your intestines?
Jack: Kate can hold up a mirror!
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Knowing shit is how I can cope with my existence. If i understand everything everything feels manageable.
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my mental problem-solution-workaround white board is getting too big for my head I think I need an actual classroom style whiteboard
#essentially it's the idea that#every problem has a solution#and if it doesn't have a solution it has a work around#the idea is to have more solutions than work arounds#and find the most optimal solutions and work arounds#there's a whole flow chart in my head#I might actually work on one in a drawing program later
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#pit babe#pit babe the series#pit babe 2#pit babe season 2#charlie has one (1) solution to every problem
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i have no mouth and i must scream speech but for about insomnia hate hate hate let me tell you how much i have come to hate being awake
#took half an expired tops brand unisom . wheeeee medicine that does nothing and then the next day you're groggy for twelve hours#but i have to do SOMEthing if i don't Try to make myself sleep that's Giving Up and if you Give Up . well#this is the second week in a row that ive failed to sleep on a night leading into the work week and i know most of the external reasons why#like. busy day tomorrow so anxious. haven't given myself a full weekend in a really long time so strung out.#had important stuff to do earlier that didn't happen so dwelling on that. woke up at 9am and wasn't out of bed until ten thirty so like#i got more than adequate sleep last night but this does not make me feel less worried about NOT sleeping TONIGHT#because again. every time i have a night of big insomnia im convinced that it's the beginning of an unending trend#that will make me wind up like my mother who is lucky she gets more than three hours of sleep every couple of weeks#and while she's done this her whole life qnd has adjusted to it (as much as a body can) i just know. based on how insomnia is for me#that i never could. it would be exactly as terrible every time i would never be able to be calm while it was happening#anyway everybody send me your best knockout gas#AND. it's SNOWING. fuck everything i hate it all#tomorrow im gonna be groggy as hell and have to drive to work and back and have to be With It bc we're doing activities and shit#and have to be like the model of library enthusiasm when i barely have that on a good day. and not actually physically groan#every time someone new wants a card because it means i have to interrupt what im doing dor the next fifteen minutes to say a spiel#i know i shouldn't hate that i should be glad we're getting engagement. and i am. i just wish i wasn't the one at the desk#and im not good at keeping that off of my face or being welcoming when i dont feel welcoming#i haven't gotten to do processing at my actual office desk in months. haven't gotten to be Off The Floor#which certainly hasn't helped my overall stress levels. i need to not be socially on so much it's slowly pulling me apart#and then i get home wnd im too tired to do anything and my house also falls apart around me#but if i DON'T have outings i also rot . there's no solution to this problem. not without quitting my job which ill never do#bc in today's market id never get anything half as good as this ever again. and as has been established. this relatively good job#is still not good enough for me not to be emotionally and mentally falling apart
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the answer to "good representation" is not making your character a perfect example of whatever class of people they belong to, it's having additional examples. I don't think it's useful to say "never write this kind of person this way" — you're never going to account for everyone's experiences and preferences. worried your gleefully slutty bisexual is going to uphold some stereotypes? add more bisexuals with different approaches or priorities. concerned your bitter disabled guy is reinforcing the idea that disability ruins your life? add another disabled character who's thriving. avoid tokenizing your characters and you'll have a lot more room to breathe.
#obviously not every story has room for a large cast#but you can still think about how other people might live their lives in your setting and reflect that#I just don't think “never have a campy Gay Villain” is a satisfying solution to the problem
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Imagine you're Mr. Wu and your weird gay daughter runs away in tears after destroying some unespecified object while yelling about you ruining her life. Because you told her you'd be moving to another state. This is the last time you see your daughter in half a year, and when she comes back, she comes back... wrong. She's wearing a light leather armor, a fur-lined cape, and a green flower crown. She has two long scars, one alongside her spine and the other along her chest, the tissue around them covered in burn scars. Doctors say she shouldn't have survived. Doctors say she didn't. Yet she's right here, in front of you, hospital gown clinging to her small, fragile, trembling frame. She fidgets with her hands. Getting her to stay still has always been difficult, but now it seems impossible. She won't let go of her phone. She's always texting her two friends. When you take it away, she gets anxious. You always knew those damn phones cause kids to act weird, but your kid having a panic attack seems too extreme, even for her. Then again, she's always been odd. Nowadays, she wakes up crying and screaming almost every night, and you realize she's been stealing her phone from your bedside drawer every night to text her friends, returning it before you wake up. You catch her once and decide to give her that damn phone back. It's the only thing that calms her down, as if she were a baby with a pacifier. She spends her last weeks in LA clinging to her friends, having sleepovers and playing her weird board games with them. Everytime they drop her back at her house, there's an excessive amount of hugs and tears. But the moments when they call her, or when she leaves to meet with them, or when they show up at their door to pick her up... those are the only moments in which you see her happy. One of her friends, the rude and disobedient one, came back with a big scar on her face. She's been acting a lot nicer, though. The other one too. She acts a great deal more adult now. You doesn't know what happened or where your daughter went. She won't tell you. But you can tell this friendship is the only thing keeping her afloat right now. Maybe you know, deep down, that no one else would understand.
And then you decide to move anyway because fuck her amirite
#amphibia#marcy wu#my posts#so like what if marcy moving away was a proper tragedy#what if things were WORSE for her#what if *smashes marcy with a ROCK*#i realized that.#despite my parents being shitty (just found out literaly today my mom had doctors give me the wrong treatment because she assumed my body#would react the same way as hers. instead of doing what literally every doctor told her to do. now i need to get it fixed)#they still asked me how I felt about moving away to a different province when in like. 8.#like. oh right. this is something parents generally ask their kids about. instead of uprooting their entire lives out of nowhere.#marcy's situation is complicated in a narrative sense because#in order for her arc to work her departure must be dictated by morally neutral forces outside of her control#but her parents' decision seems very shitty with the context we're given. you COULD give context that justified their actions#i.e have them explain that they really do need this if they want marcy to go to college or some shit like that#but then it stops being Marcy vs. Forces of Nature#and it becomes Marcy vs. Her Dad (and she has to accept he's right in this one)#the show is clearly for a Marcy vs. Forces of Nature conflict (in this case it's the inevitability of change)#and in order to keep the antagonistic force abstract you CAN'T have her dad be a proper character#BUT. as a consequence -> Marcy has to give into the ''#the ''natural order'' which would be accepting her parents' power over her as natural and inevitable#it's not even like... accepting her parents are right or anything. just that their o#that their complete control of the situation and marcy's total powerlessness is natural and inevitable#and that's tragic! from a more watsonian ñerspective#perspective* : Marcy is sent back to her shitty parents and she just needs to learn how to deal with it away from her support system#the solution imo would have been to change the motivation behind her family moving away so that it's outside her parents' control too#it really has to be completely inevitable. i can't think of an alternative reason but it's just what it#it's what would fix this problem imo#it's a simple fix really
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what it feels like to come to realizations about yourself that give u a path forward to the person you wanna be.
#i couldn't find an image that suited the feeling so i made my own lmfao#enjoy#it's been. a year.#i'm trying to take away lessons this year has given me and use them moving forward#i have to believe that out of difficult problems come good solutions yk?#i wanna know i tried to keep being better every year#anyway#personal stuff#life just keeps on going and i wanna go with it#im gonna enjoy many more sunsets over beautiful vistas#with friends and loved ones and probably a partner again whenever that day comes#theres a life out there that'll make me content and im gonna find it
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Animorphs Book club book 8
My reaction can be summarised as this (yet again):

I don't have many thoughts because uh. That was depressing as hell and I need to stare at a wall.
But I DO gotta say that the subplot with the dead "wife" was so telenovela-esque that for a good minute it was more funny than depressing. Then it got depressing. But it was so jarring and so far out of the left field that for a good second my friend and I had to pause the audiobook and laugh because ????????? Unhinged to just appear, go "I am Eslin, I have a G U N. My secret wife was killed. By my boss. Now I yearn for sweet sweet revenge." and not elaborate. Like. Damn dude ok. Sorry about our wife also. Fucking killed me that he continued like "So anyway I reacted adequately by killing all of my boss' friends. Starvation style." Like ???? Jjhsgdjsdfghsjdfh what????? I mean damn I do respect the grind set but also that's such an absurd escalation out of context. Did your boss kill your wife? Kill all of his friends! And in context the most absurd part is probably the notion that Visser 3 has friends??????? Like??? Wait no Eslin. Eslin wait. I love your John Wick-esque "fridged wife" trope swag but you need to slow down. I need details. I need you to tell me HOW your boss even has friends.
In my heart I do not believe we will see that madman ever again but on god I do wish for an insane telenovela-esque sequence of him just showing up at the most random moment to do exactly one thing and that's to pull a gun on Visser 3. For no reason, I just think it would be kinda funny. Like,,,did your boss kill your wife?:
Kill all of his friends
Acquire a G U N
Attempt to make the local Andalite youth assassinate your boss for you
Pull the gun on your boss
???????
Profit (probably die)
Aside from that, I also need to say that the moment when Ax called Tobias his close friend at the end was so sweet. Also ngl kinda...concerning/harrowing how much Tobias really doesn't give a shit about not being a human. Like it doesn't seem so concerning from other points of view but the way Ax gets increasingly weirded out by Tobias not asking him about the nothlit (idk if I'm spelling that right rn) really reminds you that it IS kinda worrying. Like I get it, I mean...Tobias has no family that cares about him, he has no friends outside of the Animorphs friend group, why would he care? But it's still kinda...yeah.
Also unimaginably surprised by the amount of collective guilt present in the Andalite society. You'd think they're Catholic or something the way they keep beating themselves up and force everyone to also beat themselves up and their system itself is saturated with the guilt and shame and they teach it to kids at school from an early age. Like. Jesus Christ calm down. Stop that. As the Animorphs said at the end of the book - the Andalites made an oopsie once. It sucked, yes, it continues to have consequences that suck, yes, but it happens. Sometimes you think you're doing something kind and it turns into a disaster. That does not mean you should beat yourself up for it or, god forbid, tell other people that they should not be kind lest they make a mistake. Damn I guess we should all be cold assholes forever, huh? I'm sure that can't have any negative consequences.
Andalite society in general seems kinda unhinged. Like...do I get why it is like that? Yeah. But do I find it unhinged? Also yeah. Like ok duty and the collective being the most important things is totally sensible for a prey animal. Safety of the herd and all that. But it's still kinda unhinged that they do make everyone have duty as their number 1 priority and that they have rituals devoted to it. Not all rituals are spiritual or religious in nature, but the morning ritual is kinda...borderline religious in a way. More spiritual than religious, I suppose, but yeah.
Also I love Ax so much. 10/10 character. He has it all: an incredibly hilarious desire for cinnamon buns, the inability to act like a human being (same dude), spitting random facts at completely random times, a thirst for blood only a 13(?) years old could have, a dysfunctional obsession with duty and doing what is right that only a 13(?) years old could have (also lol yeah dude I was like that when I was 13 too. dw you'll grow out of it), he can even code. And he might even be bi (I'm joking but I' referring to the fact that he was like "Yeah so when I morph into a human form I suddenly agree that Rachel is beautiful and that Marco is cute.").
#animorphs#animorphs book club#honestly though i was starting to wonder WHEN some Yeerks would go 'fuck it i dont hate to put up with that idiots shit. i vote for mutiny.#because like...Visser 3 is...well id describe him as the empires weakest soldier. like he seems to have SOME brain cells rattling around bu#he doesnt seem to use them correctly?? like ok he is pretty paranoid and that itself is annoying. he is obsessed with Andalites enough to b#mockingly called 'half-Andalite fool' by some of his subordinates. he lacks charisma and cannot for the life of him even look like a leader#of any sort. he is deeply unpleasant to be around and nobody enjoys his company. he is half-decent at planning but only half-decent#and what he manages to plan he tends to ruin by every other aspect of himself (either he antagonises his subordinates so much that they don#tell him information or he makes an impulsive decision etc etc)#he is nearly fully incompetent and his only advantage is that everyone is afraid of him. but the problem is that theyre afraid for a#good reason and that is BAD because that means that one day theyll become too pissed to be afraid. like. ok. he has a famine on his hands.#he makes the brutal and cruel but strategically sound decision to reduce the numbers of the soldiers. he immediately fucks up big time#by killing them more or less at random instead of being strategic about it. a strategic plan would be to kill someone and find out who#all of their colleagues are and kill those too. if you dont kill a subordinates colleague because they happen to have a more important#position; of course that person will be pissed off and probably organise a group with OTHER similar people and that group WILL#attempt to murder you (probably brutally) or die trying. so basically he antagonises literally everyone around him by being personally#unpleasant; volatile; conceited and impulsively aggressive AND incapable of as much as hearing feedback or willing to change his mind#and the last point also antagonises people on a formal level. and he also kills their friends. at random. and threatens everyone constantly#hes like a if a chihuahua had a huge scorpion tail and it was absolutely deadset on asserting itself by simply slashing everything and#everyone with that tail. like genuinely he has no charisma he doesnt even pretend to care about anything that doesnt interest him he is#inflexible he cant adapt his plans half of the time because he wants them to be THAT way and not THAT way also why is he like my mother?#like the longer im typing this for the more i feel like im just talking about my mother. damn. thats depressing.#anyway. my point was yeah i would have been surprised if nobody wanted his head on a plate. i think all the Yeerks who are sick of his shit#should unionise. i just think itd be funny. like several of them are just like 'Man i dont give a shit about this war or whatever i just#want to be allowed to have emotions and to love my coworker over here and also my boss is a nightmare i hope he gets colic and dies'#like ok guys i have a solution. G U N
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thoughts on Ginny and Harry as a couple?
There are a lot of people who find their romance in HBP forced. I don't think it's forced so much as underwritten, and the books don't get the chemistry quite right (though the movies certainly don't, either). There's potential, but they just don't get enough actual scenes of substance (besides Harry thinking she's pretty or feeling jealous of Dean) for a lot of readers to buy that they're not only in love, but deeply enough in love to break up, get back together, and wind up married.
That's not to say I don't see the appeal. There's a very cool scene in Book 5 where Harry's doing a woe-is-me-Chosen-One act, and Ginny effortlessly puts him in his place about it by reminding him that she was possessed by Voldemort at eleven, which is a rare glimpse into her character and also a great synecdoche for their relationship — Ginny is a grounding presence who, like Ron and Hermione, isn't going to be awed by his past adventures because she knew him before they happened. In that respect, Ginny's probably one of the few women Harry could feasibly wind up with, because he only ever seems comfortable around people (let alone girls) who can see past the Chosen-One schtick and treat him like a normo (see: Ron, Hermione, the Weasleys, Luna, Hagrid). True to type, he doesn't get interested in Ginny at all until she's ditched her celebrity crush and ceased to view him as an idol, because in his heart of hearts, Harry wants to be a normal boy, and it's stressed over and over that part of what he likes about his relationship with Ginny is how normal it feels. He kind of has a horribly supercharged version the celebrity dating problem: after the Battle of Hogwarts, anyone he meets is going to know him first as Harry Potter, Chosen One, Boy Who Lived, and Actually Fucking Resurrected Messiah of the Wizarding World, which is... I mean, it's possible that there are witches out there who could get over that, but Harry's not an extroverted guy, and I'm not sure how he'd go about finding them. Ginny's the one who's been there since the beginning, doesn't need anything about him or his past explained to her, and actually likes him for who he is.
When you look at it that way, it's not surprising he married his high school girlfriend. She's one of the few people still alive who doesn't see him as a demigod.
#in general I was never one to ship harry with anybody#what I wanted for him was a long quiet life and plenty of therapy#maybe some dogs. i think harry needs dogs and deserves them#The other obvious solution ftr — though not one I think Harry would take — is for him to marry a muggle#though again. you'd run into the problem of how you explain All That#which harry doesn't like to talk about and probably would want to talk about even less as an adult#plus also: harry loves magic. like he loves it loves it#the muggle world for harry is permanently connected with the dursleys and it would take years to break that association#which I just don't think he's going to invest#Harry post-BOH is moving to Hogsmeade or wizarding London or some other magical neighborhood and staying there forever#by the way this post is not anti Harry and Ginny! no hate on the ship I've seen versions of it that are very cute#but I just think their love story needed Sauce#there are also some really interesting posts I've found in Deep Fandom crackship blogs about h/g as Harry's sublimated desire for Ron#now I don't necessarily buy that reading. I don't think Harry is in love with Ron in the original text#I do think he LOVES ron and projects that love onto the Weasleys very quickly ginny included#and I think Ron is his soulmate platonic or otherwise in every universe#so marrying Ginny has like. Implications. vis-a-vis Harry's status as a Weasley and adoptive brother[in law] of Ron#like it's a full-circle moment where he becomes officially legally a member of Ron's family#which I do believe JKR had in mind. even though that basically means ginny's wedding becomes kinda... actually... about her brother...#it's weird basically. my final verdict is I wish H/G had been written by an author who was more interested in Ginny for Ginny's sake.#greenteacup asks
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Haha, thinking about why Lark hates Henry again
#dndads#dungeons and daddies#dndads spoilers#lark oak#Henry oak#em I know you’re not there yet don’t read the tags 🔫#does lark even know why he hates his father so much?#when Henry met dood did he consider asking for a favor?#I’m in shambles#this is probably the only time every that a character hating someone has ever left me in shambles like this#nothing can be done to even repair it#and sparrow is over here essentially cosplaying their father and THATS fine#at least to lark#it’s just Henry’s EXISTENCE that’s the problem#and no talking or understanding or curse breaking or magical intervention can fix it#I’ve been circling in my head Henry possibly turning down a solution to keep lark’s autonomy#but really lark hasnt had any autonomy in his relationship with his father since he was a child#and he doesn’t even KNOW
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behold, captain strisc terlot, aka... the solution
#art#strisc#shes just a regular fleet captain with no special job description#however she was titled the solution because despite not even being THAT high up the ranks#shes solved every problem theyve thrown at her and is an ESSENTIAL part of the ripmaw crew#but shes very attached to her squad and thus has refused every promotion offered to her
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no im sorry but now that i know one of the redacted wips is one of the bad batch as a dad I MUST know at least which one it is 😭
Hahaha no I get it, I know it’s kind of a tease to put it on the list if I’m going to be cagey about it. Mostly it’s because idk how it’ll be received and I don’t want people being snide in my inbox about the choice of character/topic
Anyway it’s Tech lol
#Q&A#hounds speaks#Again it was mostly just me wanting to write Tech more realistically and this happened to be the scenario I thought would force his#character to contend with the most challenges/changes/conflict#both internal and external#Because what do you do when you exist with with the express purpose of being a soldier and suddenly you have to contend with a life change#you may not have even thought you’d live long enough to see?#What happens when suddenly you can’t Logic your way through or out of every problem and you’re forced to deal with messy feelings?#Ones that don’t have an easy answer or solution?#What happens when the guy who always has answers or knows how to FIND answers#is suddenly dealing with something entirely out of his wheelhouse or control#And how long does it take for his façade of collected calm to snap?#Anyway#I just really enjoy the stoic scientist characters suddenly dealing with emotional conflicts#And I really REALLY like when it’s family dynamics or them becoming a dad#The Ghostbusters: Afterlife scene where Callie finds all of Egon’s careful notes and personal effects pertaining to her#just GETS to me#And out of the five of the 99 crew Tech is the least likely you think of being a dad#Especially being the first before the rest of them#ok I’m done for real this time
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What is it that draws me to you (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#DAX#ZEX#In case you missed my DAXfic post lol - accompanying art! Have some images!#There is actually a set of speculation around VUX medals but I forgot to go look at it and now I forget where it is ahhhh#I'll find it again! I'm gonna look the heck out of it!!#The important shorthand being communicated here is that DAX only had one medal while ZEX has a few - little militia hehe#Which medals of theirs match and which are exclusive to ZEX's brilliance..... To DAX's specialties..............#Writing the fic is a bit of a blur now since I wrote it all in one night and was Very tired by the end of it lol#It's so ZEX-centric for being DAX's POV hehe <3 He loves ZEX! Can't take his eye off him ♪#But there was a lot of ZEX-study in there as well - specifically around his impulsivity and how that affects his work vs. social lives#Genius-level creative at problem-solving but socially inept <3 We love a problem/solution nail/hammer dichotomy hehe <3#Not every problem can be solved in the same way! How frustrating hehe#It did feel very indulgent to write a ''How did we get here'' to DAX calling ZEX ''sir'' rather than his name ahh#Not that I mind!!! It was fun <3 It's sweet <3 It really might as well be a pet name by this point hehe#The kind of intimacy that grows into itself - and yet context also matters so much!#Calling him Admiral (or whatever rank he's at - like when ZEX comes to congratulate him ah <3) /can/ be a distancing move#But also a show of respect and admiration - and ''sir'' can be the same! Signal of fealty over personal closeness hhahhahahhhhhghrhrhg#<Insane about them noises#Glad to have written it ♪ Even if it wasn't my intended fic for the month I'm glad it's here <3
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Theatre obssesed mentally ill person with sharp object going through the horrors but putting a theatre lens on it in order to cope with the horrors ?
theater obsessed mentally ill person with sharp object going through the horrors but putting a theater lens on it in order to cope with the horrors, forced to endure endless cycles that even death can not remove them from, who have a past that they can not- under ANY circumstances- return to, but who have a distant repressed part of themself who longs to return to it anyways, who have become so detached from their own bodies that the thought of being maimed and dying- whether from someone else's actions or their own- is meaningless to them at worst and addictive at best, who puts on a facade because if they drop the act their friends will hate them and never want to be around them anymore, who only has one person who knows the True Them and has to bottle it up from everyone else, who deems themself inherently unlovable unless they say the exact right things, do the exact right actions, perform the exact right way, who love their friends so much it makes them sick to their fucking stomach but who can NOT break their illusion of confidence and control to allow themself to be loved the way they desperately need to. also sometimes they eat a fruit and get sick
#wigfrid's solution to every problem she has is “guess i'll die” her ass is NOT getting out of the timeloop 😭😭😭😭#if she were ever to be in one#she would stay in there and get sick in the head#ask
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