#she would stay in there and get sick in the head

[kannady]

ever, ever after

pairing: sylus x non-mc reader

summary: sylus didn't love you. how could he when she was around? but would he come look for you if you willingly step into EVER's boundaries?

word count: 3.8k

a/n: HOLY SHIT! i did not expect that many people to read the prev part and actually like it???? thank you so much to all you lovely people. seeing everyone excited for the next part just lit me on fire. hope you'll like this one. lemme know your thoughts!

read rest of the chapters here!

II

The mug shattered on the floor.

The sound was too loud in the silence of the lab, ceramic shards skittering across the frosted glass tiles. Coffee pooled dark and bitter, seeping into the panels. You stood there, frozen, fingers still curled around the ghost of the handle, your pulse a frantic drumbeat against your ribs.

Behind the observation window, Sylus didn’t move.

His crimson eyes stayed locked onto yours, unblinking, like a predator eyeing his prey. Even through the distortion of the reinforced glass, you could see the way his chest rose and fell. Too steady for a man strapped to a chair, electrodes burrowed into his skin, a veterinary-grade sedative no doubt pumping through his veins. His lips were parted just slightly, as if he wanted to speak but couldn’t. Or wouldn’t.

"Dr. (Y/N)?"

Mara’s voice cut through the ringing in your ears. You hadn’t even noticed her approach, but now she was right beside you, her gloved hand hovering near your elbow like she wasn’t sure if you’d bolt or collapse.

"What happened?"

Your tongue felt too thick in your mouth. "It.. Um.. It was too hot," you murmured, the lie slipping out before you could stop it. "I dropped it."

Mara’s brow furrowed, but she didn’t press. Around you, the other researchers had paused in their work, some staring openly, others pretending not to notice the way your hands trembled as you bent to pick up the broken pieces.

"Leave it." A senior researcher, Dr. Voss, dismissed you with a flick of his clipboard. "I’ve called for someone."

A cleaner arrived within minutes, silent and efficient, sweeping up the evidence of your momentary lapse. You barely registered their presence. Your entire body was wound tight, every nerve was burdened with the weight of Sylus’s gaze.

Someone handed you fresh lab glasses, gloves, and the file. Thick, heavy, the words SUBJECT M-7 stamped across the front in bold black letters. You took it mechanically, flipping through the pages without really seeing them.

Evol Classification: Energy Manipulation (Class VIII, potentially IX). Containment Protocols: Electromagnetic shackles. Sedation drip. Two cranial failsafe implants.

Your stomach twisted. A cold chill slithered down your spine.

You tilted your head, just a fraction, just enough, and there he was. Still watching. Still waiting.

What the hell are you doing here?

The question screamed inside your skull, a frantic, looping mantra.

How did they catch you?

Sylus didn’t get caught. Sylus was the trap. Right?

Why are you here?

Your fingers tightened around the file, the edges digging into your palms. Was this a trick? A doppelgänger? Some sick game EVER was playing to test your loyalty?

But no. No, you knew those eyes. Knew the way they darkened when he was amused, knew the way they gleamed like fresh blood under sunlight. Knew the way they’d followed you, even when you thought you’d vanished completely.

He found you.

And now he was here, strapped to a chair in your lab, at your mercy, and the irony was so sharp it could have drawn blood.

You forced yourself to turn away, to focus on the vials in front of you. But your hands weren’t steady. The chemicals sloshed dangerously as you measured them out, your thoughts a hurricane of panic and disbelief.

Then Mara nudged you.

She leaned in, her voice a whisper against your ear. "Do you… know this guy or something?"

Your grip faltered. The vial slipped, just for a second, before you caught it, your breath hitching. "No," you said, too quickly. "Of course not. Why would you think that?"

Mara’s gaze flicked toward the window, then back to you. "I dunno. He keeps looking at you." A pause. "Like, only at you. He hasn’t looked anywhere else since you walked in."

Your heartbeat stuttered. You didn’t dare look again. But you could feel him.

The weight of his stare. The unspoken question in it. The accusation.

"Dr. (Y/N)?" Voss’s voice snapped you back. "We’re waiting on those samples."

You swallowed hard. "Right," you murmured. "Sorry."

But as you turned back to your work, your hands moving on autopilot, your mind was somewhere else entirely.

Somewhere with crimson eyes and a voice that still haunted your dreams.

Somewhere you’d sworn you’d never return.

And yet here he was.

***

The lab was silent now, the usual hum of machinery and murmured conversations long faded into the night. You sat alone, bathed in the sterile glow of your computer screen, fingers stiff from hours of typing reports you barely registered. When you finally looked up to stretch, your eyes immediately darted to the observation window, only to find it empty. The reinforced glass reflected back your own tired expression, the chair beyond it now vacant, restraints dangling uselessly from its arms. A cold shiver traced your spine as you realized he was gone.

Fumbling for the tablet, your fingers left smudges on the screen as you pulled up the subject logs. The blue text glared back at you: SUBJECT M-7: TRANSPORTED TO SECURE HOLDING. Scheduled for observations and procedures only. 

Your breath left you in a slow, unsteady exhale. Of course they wouldn't keep him here overnight. EVER wasn't foolish enough to leave a Class VIII Evol subject unattended in a standard lab. But the realization did nothing to ease the tightness in your chest.

A bitter laugh escaped your lips before you could stop it. 

What were you even doing? 

Two years. Two full years you'd spent building this new life, carving out a place where no one knew your past, where you could finally breathe without calculating every word and gesture. And yet, the moment those crimson eyes had locked onto yours through the glass, it was as if no time had passed at all. 

You were right back where you started. Heart racing, palms sweating, that familiar ache settling deep in your bones.

The worst part was the ridiculous, traitorous thought that had flashed through your mind when you first saw him. Did he come here for me? 

The idea was laughable now. Sylus didn't chase. Sylus didn't get captured. If he was here, it was because he wanted to be. Part of some elaborate scheme you were never meant to understand until it was too late. 

Unless…

Your fingers stilled on the keyboard as the alternative occurred to you. What if he hadn't come willingly? The thought sent an entirely different kind of chill through you. You knew what EVER did to high-value subjects. You'd seen the files, signed off on procedures that had kept you awake at night. If they had truly captured him…

Your gaze dropped to your phone lying beside the keyboard. Two years since you'd last heard their voices. Two years since you'd walked away without looking back. Did you even have the right to call them now? Would they answer? Would they care? Your thumb hovered over Luke's contact, the number you'd never deleted, no matter how many times you told yourself you were done with that life.

The call didn't connect. Just a robotic voice informing you the number was switched off. 

Kieran's was the same. The hollow ache in your chest expanded, though you couldn't say whether it was from relief or disappointment. This was stupid. Completely, utterly stupid. He was the reason you'd left. The reason you'd spent nights staring at the ceiling, wondering if you'd ever be more than just another asset in his carefully calculated world.

And yet here you were, ready to throw away everything you'd built. Your career, your safety, your hard-won peace, all because of one look from those damned crimson eyes. You shoved the phone into your pocket with more force than necessary, pushing back from the desk so abruptly your chair nearly toppled. 

No. You weren't doing this. You weren't that person anymore.

Except if this wasn't part of his plan. If he really was trapped here, at the mercy of the same organization you'd seen tear subjects apart molecule by molecule. Your fingers curled into fists, nails biting into your palms. Damn it. You were going to regret this. 

The phone felt heavy in your hand as you stood frozen on the sidewalk outside your apartment building, your thumb hovering over Luke's contact for what must have been the twentieth time that night. The wind bit through your thin lab coat as you pressed call again, listening to the hollow ringing that seemed to echo in your bones. Two rings. Then silence. Just like before. Just like every other attempt you'd made since leaving the lab. 

Kieran's number didn’t even connect. That infuriating automated voice informing you the number was unavailable, the robotic tone doing nothing to mask the panic rising in your chest.

You shoved the phone back into your pocket with trembling fingers, your breath fogging in the cold air as you finally turned toward your apartment building. The walk up the stairs felt endless, each step heavier than the last. Some foolish, traitorous part of you kept expecting to see him. To turn a corner and find Sylus leaning against your doorframe with that infuriating smirk, crimson eyes glinting in the dim hallway light as if this were all some elaborate game. The thought made your pulse stutter, equal parts dread and something else you refused to name twisting in your gut.

But of course, he wasn't there.

You'd seen him with your own eyes just hours earlier. Strapped to that chair in the lab, electrodes buried in his skin, his silver hair matted with sweat and blood near his temple. The image burned behind your eyelids every time you blinked. 

Yet when your key finally clicked in the lock, you still hesitated, the door creaking open far too slowly as you peered inside like some frightened child checking for monsters.

The apartment was exactly as you'd left it, your half-finished coffee still sitting cold on the counter, the blanket you'd used last night draped haphazardly over the arm of the couch. Normal. Safe. Empty.

The breath left your lungs in a rush as you stepped inside, kicking off your heels with more force than necessary, watching them skid across the hardwood. You collapsed onto the couch without bothering to turn on the lights, the dim glow from the streetlights outside casting long shadows across the ceiling. The silence pressed in around you, heavy and suffocating.

What the hell were you doing?

Your fingers twitched toward your phone again before you could stop yourself. There was no one else to call. No one trustworthy, no one who wouldn't ask questions you couldn't answer. The realization settled like a stone in your stomach. Where were they? Luke and Kieran never turned their phones off. Never. Not unless something was very, very wrong.

The thought followed you into bed, clinging like a second skin as you tossed and turned beneath the sheets. When sleep finally came, it was fitful and haunted. Flashes of a too-familiar mansion, the scent of gun oil and expensive bourbon, the sound of her laughter ringing through the halls like wind chimes. 

***

You woke with a gasp, your body drenched in cold sweat, the digital clock on your bedside table blinking 4:47 AM in harsh red numbers.

For one disorienting moment, you didn't know where you were. The dream still clung to you, the weight of his gaze making your skin prickle even now. You fumbled for your phone with numb fingers, your heart hammering against your ribs as you checked for missed calls. 

Nothing. No messages. No signs that either of them had even seen your attempts to reach them.

The shower was ice-cold, the water biting at your skin until it was numb. You scrubbed at your arms until they were pink, as if you could wash away the memories, the doubt, the creeping sense that nothing had really changed at all. That no matter how far you ran or how well you hid, you were still tangled in the same web.

The morning passed in a blur of too-strong coffee and mechanical movements, brushing your teeth, pulling your hair back into a ponytail, buttoning your lab coat with fingers that refused to steady. Before you knew it, you were standing outside the lab doors, your hand frozen halfway to the access panel.

You didn't want to go in. Didn't want to see him again. Didn't want to know what they were doing to him. But the weight of your keycard in your pocket reminded you that you had no choice.

"Dr. (Y/N), authorization code Rose-9-White," you murmured, your voice sounding foreign to your own ears.

The locks disengaged with a hiss that seemed far too loud in the empty hallway. You stepped inside, your eyes immediately darting to the observation window before you could stop yourself, only to find it empty again. The chair stood vacant, the restraints hanging loose. Your stomach twisted.

Mara glanced up from her workstation, blinking at you over the rim of her glasses. "Oh, you didn't check the morning logs?" she asked, her fingers never pausing as they flew across her keyboard.

You forced your hands to stay still at your sides. "No. What happened?"

"We finished the preliminary assessments last night," she said, turning back to her screen. A few quick taps pulled up a file labeled SUBJECT M-7: PHASE TWO. "Today we're administering the first round of the Evol-transfer serum. We'll be monitoring his vitals closely, but we've got a stabilized backup dose prepped in case his system rejects it."

Your stomach dropped like a stone.

The words Evol-transfer serum echoed in your skull, each syllable sharper than the last. You knew exactly what that meant, you had helped design the protocols yourself. The process wasn't just painful, it was excruciating. Like having your very soul ripped out piece by piece. And if his body fought it? If the serum destabilized?

Your fingers curled into fists at your sides, nails biting into your palms hard enough to leave crescent-shaped scars. The sterile air of the lab suddenly felt too thick, too warm, your lab coat constricting around your shoulders like a straitjacket. What had you gotten yourself into? More importantly, what had you allowed them to do to him?

What if you were standing on the wrong side of the glass this time?

 The thought made you sicker than anything EVER could have dreamed up in their labs.

The sterile hum of the lab equipment filled your ears as you mechanically sorted through data files, your fingers moving across the holographic display with practiced efficiency despite the storm raging inside your chest. Thirty minutes had passed since Mara's revelation about the serum, thirty minutes of forcing yourself to focus on anything but the empty observation chamber and what was coming. 

Then the doors hissed open, and your entire world narrowed to the sound of rolling wheels and the sharp, rhythmic beep of a heart monitor.

They brought him in, still strapped to that damned chair, his arms secured with reinforced electromagnetic cuffs, the electrodes embedded in his skin now surrounded by dried blood from yesterday's tests. 

The medical team moved with clinical precision, adjusting IV lines and checking readouts, but you barely registered them. Your breath caught painfully in your throat as your pulse skyrocketed, the sudden rush of blood in your ears nearly drowning out all other sound. It felt like your heart might actually tear through your ribcage.

And then he looked up.

Those crimson eyes found yours instantly, as if he'd known exactly where you'd be standing. But unlike yesterday's hollow stare, today his lips curved into that infuriating, knowing smile. The same smug smirk that had haunted your dreams for two years, the one that said he'd already calculated every possible outcome and yours wasn't the winning move. 

Your fingers spasmed around the tablet you were holding, the screen cracking slightly under the pressure before you forcibly turned away, shoulders rigid as you pretended to study a meaningless data stream.

Wait, no. The realization hit you like a bucket of ice water. This was your lab. Your workplace. Your life that you'd built painstakingly over two years of early mornings and late nights, of proving yourself again and again. 

He didn't get to waltz in here and ruin everything with one damn look. Squaring your shoulders, you inhaled deeply through your nose, the sharp scent of antiseptic helping ground you as you turned back to your workstation with renewed determination.

The next hour passed in a blur of hyper-focused activity. You moved between stations with uncharacteristic efficiency, running calculations faster than the system could typically process them, catching errors in the serum compound ratios that had slipped past three other researchers. Even Dr. Voss, the senior researcher whose narcissistic tendencies made him universally avoided, paused by your station with something resembling approval in his cold gaze. "Impressive work today, Dr. (Y/N)," he remarked, the rare praise making several nearby heads turn. "Your focus is... exceptional."

You barely registered the compliment, your entire being focused on the presence thirty feet away behind the observation glass. Every nerve in your body was aware of him, of the way his breathing changed minutely when someone approached with a new instrument, of the faint tension in his jawline that no one else would notice. You'd spent too many years studying those microexpressions, learning to read what he'd never say aloud.

"Alright," Voss's voice snapped you back to the present. "Now go and get the serum prepared. We'll begin phase one administration in five minutes."

The words sent a jolt of ice down your spine. Your feet carried you to the refrigeration unit on autopilot, your hands moving to retrieve the small vial of glowing blue liquid that represented months of your team's work. The serum felt unnaturally cold through your gloves, its faint luminescence pulsing almost like a living thing. You stood frozen for several heartbeats, staring at the vial as conflicting impulses warred in your chest.

Voss had to physically step into your line of sight before you reacted, his impatient "Well?" making you startle. When you still didn't move, he strode forward and practically snatched the serum from your grip, his sharp features twisting in displeasure. "Unusual hesitation from you today," he remarked coolly before turning away.

But you weren't looking at Voss. Your gaze had snapped back to the observation window, to the man strapped in that chair. And for just a fraction of a second, so brief you might have imagined it, you could have sworn something flickered across Sylus's face. Not anger. Not pain. But disappointment? 

The possibility sent an entirely different kind of ache through your chest, one you refused to examine too closely.

As the medical team prepared to administer the serum, you forced yourself to turn back to your workstation, your fingers flying across the controls to pull up his vital signs on your private screen. Every beep of the heart monitor, every fluctuation in brain activity would be recorded here. You told yourself it was professional curiosity. That you were simply monitoring a high-risk procedure. But when the first drops of serum entered his IV line and his body arched against the restraints with a silent scream, your nails dug into your palms hard enough to draw blood. 

And when his eyes, those damned crimson eyes, found yours through the glass once more, blazing with pain and something dangerously close to betrayal, you realized with dawning horror that you might have just made the biggest mistake of your life.

The serum's effects were worse than you'd imagined.

Each scream that tore from Sylus's throat felt like a blade twisting between your ribs. You'd never seen him like this, never heard him make a sound of pain, let alone this raw, ragged agony. His body strained against the restraints, muscles corded tight, veins standing out in beneath sweat-slicked skin. 

The monitors screamed alongside him, his heart rate spiking dangerously high as the serum worked its way through his system, attacking his Evol at the cellular level.

You stood frozen at your workstation, fingers clenched around the edge of the desk so hard your knuckles turned white. Every instinct in your body screamed at you to do something, to stop this, to rip the IV from his arm, to fix what you'd helped create. 

But you couldn't move. Couldn't breathe. Couldn't tear your eyes away from the way his head finally dropped forward, his body going limp as the worst of the pain subsided into shuddering tremors.

That serum was designed to rip it out of him entirely, to transfer it to someone else. And by the time the process was complete, he'd be dead. 

Your stomach lurched. You'd known this. You'd helped develop this. But seeing it happen to him…

Your vision blurred.

Around you, the lab continued as if nothing were wrong. Researchers murmured notes to each other, adjusting dials, recording data. No one else seemed to hear the way his breath came in short, pained gasps. No one else flinched when his fingers twitched against the restraints like he was still trying to fight.

This couldn't be happening.

Sylus didn't lose. Sylus didn't scream.

You swallowed hard, forcing yourself to look back at your screen, at the readings that confirmed what you already knew. His Evol levels were dropping. Fast.

A few hours later, the lab emptied for lunch.

Mara lingered by your station, nudging your shoulder. "Come on, let's go. You've been staring at that screen for ages."

You shook your head, not trusting your voice. "You go. I need to finish this report. I'll catch up in a minute." She hesitated, then shrugged. "Suit yourself. But if you take too long, I'm eating your share of the dumplings."

The second the door hissed shut behind her, your head snapped up. The lab was empty. Almost.

Your gaze darted to the security camera in the corner, its red light blinking steadily. You should have cared. Should have hesitated. But right now, you didn't give a damn.

"Fuck it," you muttered under your breath. You'd come up with a lie later.

In three quick strides, you were at the observation window. Sylus was slumped forward, his head hanging low, silver hair obscuring his face. You couldn't tell if he was unconscious.

You pressed your palm against the glass.

"Sylus."

No response.

Your chest tightened. You tapped the glass sharply, once, twice.

"Sylus, look at me."

For a heartbeat, nothing.

Then, slowly, agonizingly, he lifted his head.

His crimson eyes were duller than you'd ever seen them, his pupils blown wide with pain, but they locked onto yours with terrifying focus.

And then, he smirked.

That damn, infuriating smirk, even now. Even like this.

Your breath left you in a rush.

"You idiot," you hissed, your voice barely above a whisper. "What the hell are you doing here?"

His lips parted like he might answer. But then the lab door hissed open behind you.

You whirled around.

Dr. Voss stood in the doorway, his cold eyes flicking from you to Sylus and back again.

"Dr. (Y/N)," he said slowly. "Care to explain why you're talking to the subject?"

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[thatbuddie]

Hi!! 26 for the kingdon kiss roulette (A kiss while one or both parties are crying) 🫶

“Sweetheart, are you— Are you crying?”

“No,” she says, her voice strangled, a tear slowly running down her cheek.

She’s definitely crying.

“Baby…” His face is close to hers, so close that she has to cross her eyes a little to look into his eyes, making him look blurry. Although that could just be that she’s not wearing her glasses at the moment. Or the tears quickly gathering in her eyes. “Oh my god, baby.”

“Stop,” she pleads, raising one of her arms and being careful not to hit him when she throws it across her face, shielding her eyes from him as more tears start to leak from the corners. “This is so embarrassing, I’m sorry.”

“Hey, c’mon, it’s not embarrassing.” He gently wraps his fingers around her wrist and tugs at her arm, trying to get her to lower it. She resists stubbornly. “It’s not, I swear.”

“Frank,” she says, moving her arm just an inch higher so she can stare at him incredulously, “of course it’s embarrassing. You’re still inside me.”

He blinks down at her for a second before his eyes lower to gaze at the place where they’re still joined. 

“I am indeed still inside you, yeah.” Now it’s his voice that’s strangled but she doubts it’s because he’s about to break down crying like her. That’s a shame reserved exclusively for her.

“God, I’m such a cliché,” she complains, and he -very reluctantly, it appears- moves his eyes away from between her legs to look her in the eyes again. 

His face softens as he readjusts his body over hers. She notes how he carefully balances his weight on his forearms, both resting on the pillow at each side of her head, as to not crush her. With the arm not thrown over her face, she pulls his torso closer to hers, finding comfort in the way she’s squeezed between his body and the mattress. She wraps one of her legs around one of his, the ball of her foot resting against his calf. He bends his other knee to make the position easier to maintain. 

Through all this, she also notices how they’re both moving carefully, mindfully keeping their pelvis as still as they can. ensuring he stays inside her. 

“It’s a natural reaction,” he says, his voice lowering and adopting the tone she has come to recognize as hers. It’s the one he uses when he’s trying to soothe her worries, sometimes after a case gone wrong, sometimes after her and Becca have had a spat. It’s soft and almost melodic, like his words have a musical rhythm to them that is meant to tame her, to hypnotize her. “The release of oxytocin during sex can be as overwhelming as it is pleasurable, and crying has been proven to be a great way to regulate heightened emotions.”

Sniffing slightly, she blinks up at him.

After a second of silence, she says, “Thank you, Dr. Langdon.”

He presses his lips together, very obviously trying not to laugh, but he soon loses the battle and lets out a deep chuckle.

“Sorry, sorry.” He shakes his head, kissing the tip of her nose. “My bedside manner is obviously a work in progress.”

“So you do think I’m sick for crying after sex.”

His eyes widen in worry until he must read the teasing in her face. He sighs in relief, chuckling again as she joins in the laughter. It’s a strange sensation, laughing and crying at the same time, one she has never experienced before. 

This is a night for firsts, it seems like. 

“I know it might be just simple biology,” she concedes, moving her arm away from her face and wrapping it around his neck. Her other hand works on trying to tidy his hair a bit, pushing the strands of hair plastered to his temples away from his face. “I guess it just doesn’t feel that way. It feels like something…holier.”

The faint shine of the moon coming in from the window, with its curtains open wide, casts Frank’s head in a silver ring of light. He’s so beautiful, exactly what Mel would have prayed for if praying was something she had ever had faith in. 

“You know I’m not a religious person, and that I don’t believe in the sanctity of sex or the purity of virginity or that procreation should be the aim of all intercourse or that—” She takes a deep breath, slowing her words down, knowing he will wait patiently for her to get them all out. “That’s not why I hadn’t, you know, it’s not why I hadn’t had sex yet.”

He nods, and her eyes fill with even more tears. He uses one of his thumbs to catch the drops that escape from the outer corner of her left eye. 

“But I think I was still waiting for something. I didn’t know what, but I was still… Waiting.”

Even in penumbra, she can see the way his blue eyes start gleaming. 

“I think I know now that I was waiting for you.”

He closes his eyes, and the first tear travels down the elegant slope of his nose then. She thinks about wiping it away, but instead she follows its path down his philtrum, watching it as it suspends from his bottom lip for a heartbeat before falling. She swears she can feel the moment it lands on her own lips. She swears she can taste the difference between her tears and his. 

“Fuck, Mel. I was waiting for you too, baby.” This is, of course, an impossibility, as his two children are perfect proof of. But she knows exactly what he means, and she believes him. “I’ve been waiting for so long.”

The kiss they share is wet and desperate. Their tears mix on their faces, their tongues tangle inside their mouths. They are breathing the same air, passing it back and forth like it’s the last bit of oxygen that exists in the world and they both need it to survive. 

She has never been kissed like this in her life. Like he is searching for eternity in the contours of her mouth. Like he is showing his devotion at the altar of her lips.

This is a night for firsts, it seems like. 

[mullermilkshake]

Just a donor - Lying in weight.

Part 2 <- Part 3 -> Part 4

Suguru confronts you with with everything he knows so far.

Sperm donor!Satoru Gojo x Fem New mom!reader x Suguru Geto Tags - Established relationship, Manipulation, Gaslighting, Breastfeeding, Sickness,

<<< For more Satoru content, click this link to go back to the Masterlist! >>>

<<< Mood board >>>

“So, how do you want to play this?” Satoru kept himself between you and the door.

Suguru called again, stealing your attention for just a second. Satoru stepped towards you like a ghost, no sound, nor breaths to distract you until he was so close it startled you. Sakura had stopped drinking, her eyes rolled back in a drunken state and began chewing on your nipple. You didn’t want to pull away with Satoru in eye shot like this.

“I think she’s finished.” He said, noticing her mouth stop moving almost immediately as you felt it. “Maybe put her to bed and we can go and talk to Suguru together, hm?”

You were not unlatching your daughter in front of him. Just how many times had he watched you breastfeed, noticing the little signs of Sakura’s behaviour that even Suguru couldn’t keep up with?

Now, you weren’t shy about breastfeeding like you thought you might have been, happy to feed your daughter with anyone in the room, and pumped without shame while your own mother-in-law sat next to you watching a movie. More out of pure exhaustion than confidence to feed your child, Sakura was hungry more than usual and cluster fed.

“He isn’t going to believe you, Satoru.” You said, holding firm.

“You wanna test that theory out? All the messages between us and visits while Suguru’s at work, y’think his resolve is that strong?”

If he referred to the messages you and he would swap occasionally, more so that not it was regarding Suguru, or at a rare chance, asking him to pick something up for your daughter from the store. Nothing remotely suggestive or romantic in nature to even put a thought in Suguru’s head.

When you didn’t say anything, the corner of Satoru’s mouth twitched into a small yet deranged half smile. “You’re doubting him, aren’t you?”

“Honey, where are you?!” Suguru called again, sensing the bass in his voice, he was either near, or in the kitchen by now.

“Coming!” What else could you do?

“Put our baby in her crib, let’s go.” Satoru slipped off his shirt and balled it up in his hand.

“What the hell are you doing?” You jerked away from him, taking the opportunity to unlatch your daughter and cover yourself up before heading for the bedroom door. “Put your fucking shirt back on- I’m taking her with me, I'm not leaving her up here on her own.”

Satoru huffed and somehow let you walk away from him and open the door with the baby still in your arms. The sound was more like he knew how this would go and the mistake you were making was huge. A noise of condescending proportions.

You did not care.

Holding Sakura close, you bopped down the stairs, wanting to run but afraid to wake the predatory animal behind you into a run for the hunt. You hoped Suguru would greet you from the kitchen, but he sat with his back to the doorway. A large envelope addressed to him in Satoru’s handwriting, trembling in his hand, and a wad of paper in the other.

“Suguru?” Your relief never stayed long, not at the sight of large captured screenshots glaring back at him. “...Suguru.”

Satoru came in, and hurried to pull his shirt on just as Suguru looked up and noticed him, his eyes were swollen, exhausted and getting bloodshot before your eyes in real time. He looked back and shuffled through the pages, blinking everything positive away from his eyes with silent breaths.

“Is this true?”

Sakura stirred in your arms and settled back down with comforting pats to her bottom. You used the repetitive motion to ground you before your words burned away on your tongue.

“Suguru-”

“Listen, Suguru.” Satoru cut you off. “There’s something we need to tell you.”

You shook your head like it was supposed to fight your corner all on its own. “Don’t listen to him- Suguru, put those down.”

Satoru grinned at you behind his best friend's back, adjusting his shirt like some horrific victory lap. His eyes stayed trained on you the way a bloodhound would after they found the scent they tore the room apart for. “Suguru, I had to come clean about us, because we’re planning on running away-”

“What the fuck?!” How could you control yourself with a terrifying reveal like that?

Satoru placed his finger to his lips to silence you, and it almost worked. “But… wait- no, I won’t be quiet. This is ridiculous" You moved over so you were visible in Suguru’s line of sight. “Don’t listen to this bullshit, Suguru. He’s lying-”

“I always thought there was something going on with you two. I just couldn’t prove it.”

What?

The ground swayed beneath the soles of your feet before you could breathe. You couldn’t breathe, not even with your daughter on your chest like she was, not the rhythmic patting to keep her calm, not the sweet little breaths from her throat.

Suguru believed Satoru.

Your husband suspected and never told you.

He believed his best friend. Not you.

You wanted to see the screenshots, see what they said and tear them up along with the inaccuracies. Nothing on that page could have been true, there was nothing to admit truth about. You were never once unfaithful. Ever.

Satoru approached Suguru with a look you’d never seen from him before. Utter guilt. “I’m sorry, I wanted to tell you sooner, but she wanted to keep it quiet. Even now she keeps denying it, but I can’t do it to you anymore. We grew up together and I needed you to know.”

How could everything fall apart between your fingers? You wanted to lay down, to slump on a chair and cry from tears you were holding back. Was this why he wanted you to keep Sakura in her crib? To keep her from falling if you passed out?

Nothing but control, no care involved.

“Suguru…” You said, letting your tears fall down your cheeks freely. “Don’t believe it-”

“My wife, and my best friend.” Suguru sighed with exhaustion, like he was ready to give up. “It’s sort of poetic, really. My daughter isn’t related to me, but my wife’s affair partner. You two just didn’t sleep with each other to make her- well, maybe you did.”

Shaking your head became a second nature you wanted to forget the muscle memory. “Suguru we never did anything-”

He held up his hand to silence you. “Satoru, can you come back tomorrow? I’d like to talk to my wife, we’ll talk over things tomorrow… If you stay, I’m afraid that I’ll do something I’ll regret, and I don’t want to put you in the hospital right now.”

Satoru almost laughed, covering his mouth quickly to prevent it, all the while watching you and not his supposed best friend. “Alright… I’ll come by in the morning- look I’m sorry, I just had to do right by you when all this time I’d done wrong. I know you’ll never forgive me, but I need to make things right.”

“Just go.” Suguru waved him off and paid his attention to you. “Go upstairs, and put Sakura to bed and we’ll talk about this.”

Were you going insane, hallucinating or drunk? Suguru was an intelligent man, and he was just believing this bullshit as though it was gospel.

“Suguru-”

“Take her up to bed. I’ll be right up.”

You should have said no, stopped your feet from moving, but they were going without your brain telling them to. It left your mouth agape, unable to pay attention to anything around you until Satoru pulled you from it and stopped you in your tracks.

He whispered, but it was just loud enough that Suguru must have picked up on it. “Don’t worry, we’ll get this all sorted out, baby. Call me if you need anything.”

Whispering back was a result of psychological warfare. “Stay the fuck away from me and my daughter.”

You stormed off, stomping up the stairs unable to comprehend what just happened. Your husband suspected you of having an affair with his best friend, he believed it.

Sakura rested heavily on your chest, still and relaxed. When you reached the bedroom you took her right over to her crib and swadded her, pulling the pink fabric over her arms and legs, wrapping her up like a little potato and settled her in until she needed feeding again.

Then, you inhaled, struggling for air of the long drawn breath you had forgotten to take. You covered your mouth and sobbed into it, silently. The bed never felt so empty, hard and haggard, you sat down on it with a short bounce.

Your husband believed that you were cheating on him.

How do we come back from that? Can we even come back from this?

Satoru had ruined everything, every positively warm memory, each moment around your daughter, your marriage, your life. And your precious little girl knew nothing of it.

What if Suguru wanted to split up and divorce? She’d spend her life having two homes, two Christmases, two birthdays. No good memories with her mom and dad together because it became shadowed over the ghost of an affair that never happened.

She’d find out that Satoru was her biological father.

You rushed from the bed towards the bathroom, slipping through the bedroom door and barely making it over the toilet when you vomited. Panicking to pull your hair back, you wretched and hyperventilated, your life falling apart just as easily as the bile leaving your mouth. Everything hadn’t just fallen apart in a single evening, or a few weeks, maybe even months and you never knew.

You never knew.

I never knew anything.

When there was nothing left to bring up, you barely brushed your teeth and cleaned your face, noting how puffy your eyes were. No amount of makeup would cover it enough to stop your skin looking half dead.

“Oh my god-” You don’t know why, but you didn’t actually anticipate Suguru coming up like he said.

He sat on your side of the bed, watching his daughter sleep. You stood in the doorway unable to move, unable to breathe, unable to think.

“Come and sit next to me.” He said, patting the bed halfheartedly, about as much effort as he could muster.

“Suguru-“

“Please.”

You held your breath, padding over to bed to sit down with the pit of your stomach in your knees. The springs in the bed creaked under your weight, judging you for nonexistent actions and lies in Satoru’s web.

It was bullshit that you even had to defend yourself. “Suguru, what he said- the screenshots, all of its lies. Nothing happened.”

“I know.”

“He’s delusional and he- wait, what?”

“I know you’re telling the truth, honey.”

You sat there in a state of shock, holding yet another breath, another string of words you couldn’t quite get off your chest and lingered in your throat.

Suguru took your hand lovingly in his, keeping his tired eyes in the baby, blinking slow enough that his aching eyes began to weep.

“I'll be honest in saying I did suspect, and I’ll live with that guilt for the rest of my life for not trusting you, but I’m so tired… so exhausted… It was so difficult not letting those thoughts in.”

Despite Suguru’s explanation, you couldn’t shake away the sharp stab, a little shard of your heart chipping away. “I hope you know that I’d never do something so horrible.”

“I know, I know you wouldn’t… I should have seen this coming, the way Satoru was acting around you in the beginning- you were so oblivious to it. I just hoped he’d moved on, and for a while I thought he had.”

“What do you mean?” It was only after Sakura was born that things escalated.

Six weeks wasn’t long, but to a sleep deprived new mother, it may as well have been six years.

“The way he looked at you when we first started going out, he thought I never saw it, that I wasn’t paying attention, but I was. Then it stopped and I thought it was the end of that. But it hadn’t.”

This whole time. This whole fucking time, Satoru had his eye on you and you never knew. Well, how could you? It wasn’t like you were looking at him a whole lot. 

You remembered sitting there, meeting Satoru for the first time, meeting all of Suguru’s friends for the first time. Being nervous as hell, wiping your sweaty palms on your jeans before greeting them. Satoru pulled you into a hug and no one corrected it, you chalked it up to being his regular behaviour.

Now, you couldn’t tell his own baseline.

“I never knew he watched me like that.”

Unsettling was an understatement, a poor use of the word. You thought of each interaction you could remember with Satoru being the main focus and never saw anything before Sakura’s birth of notoriety.

“I just ignored it, I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry.” Suguru finally made eye contact, squeezing your hand with a firmness you felt safe in. “If I had, then maybe we wouldn’t be in this mess.”

“You didn’t know he was like this.”

He gave an amused huff in response. “Didn’t I?”

“What do you mean?”

Suguru cleared his throat and adjusted himself uncomfortably to avert his gaze from you once again. “Satoru had a girlfriend maybe two years before I met you. She was lovely, kind, and had a tendency to see the best in others… until she left him, after that, she told the friend group that he tried baby trapping her while they were together and was stalking her after the break up.”

Baby trapping? It was all beginning to make sense. But stalking a girl… what the fuck was he capable of?

“So… you pulled him up on that, right?”

He shook his head slowly, so much regret over his eyes. “He played it off, said she was unstable and needed help. He said she cheated on him and ran off with this prick on the other side of the country… but now I’m doubting what is true and what isn’t. Not after the way he spoke to you.”

“You heard?”

“Well, after I suspected you two were-“ He stopped himself from saying it. “I put a recorder in the bedroom, because I wanted to get proof- please don’t think bad of me- I didn’t know what to do.”

“I don’t judge you for it, love. But what I’m confused about is why you thought I was messing around in the first place.”

Suguru ran his fingertip over the edge of Sakura's little nose, she sucked lips together. “It was all Satoru, he would act strange when I got back from work while you were up putting Sakura to sleep, or he’d pay you a compliment out of ear shot. And then I found your underwear in his car, he shoved it in his pocket when I brought it up and he said that he’d been seeing someone new.”

It unsettled you to even ask. “How did you know they were mine?”

He sighed again and pinched the bridge of his nose as though to prepare himself. “They were part of the set I bought you for our anniversary last year.”

You gasped, covering your mouth so as to not wake your daughter up. The missing underwear you thought you misplaced, never suspected that they were stolen. Satoru had been rifling through your underwear drawer. That man had touched your intimate clothing, looked at everything else that you had stashed away in there, like your adult toys and spare lube when nights got steamy. Satoru had seen it all.

Fuck- fucking fuck.

“What do we do, Suguru? This is fucked up.”

"Fuck... why did he do this to me? to us? He was my ride or die." Suguru turned to you, closer than he had been before, A saddened gaze and caressing your cheek to settle you. “We’ll need to play him at his own game… I won’t allow him to tear our family apart, even if he was my best friend."

You knew then, that the amount of effort it would have taken to just get Suguru’s name on the birth certificate was less than what was to come.

Why didn’t we just get it changed like we wanted to?

Even if you did, something told you Satoru wouldn’t have just rolled over if you actually went through with it.

He was more insidious than that.

Part 2 <- Part 3 -> Part 4

If you would like to be tagged, please let me know! 🤗

Tag list - @ryomenslvr @ilovebattinson @ilyannailyanna @charlenexoxo1 @satorupied

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@merceriee

DISCLAIMER - Crossposted from my AO3 - I do not own any of the characters or anything from the anime. This is a work of fan fiction and is absolutely not representative of the views or intentions of the original creator(s).

Also please don’t post any of my work without permission thank you!

[wintersarge]

short straw- john walker

summary: after being left behind for a mission, you and john are the only two in the tower. the only problem? you were sick and john was... well, john- completely clueless. what could go wrong?

pairing: john walker x reader

word count: 1.9k

content: mentions of general illness, reader being unwell, john being a little silly and generally just clueless. fluff.

enjoy!!

You had drawn the shortest of short straws. 

Valentina had pulled the team into a meeting a few days ago, informing you all of a recon mission that was taking place at some fancy arms deal. You were initially excited at the prospect of dressing up nice for once, even if it was for intel gathering, and you knew exactly the dress you’d wear at the gala- the silky blue one that hung at the back of your closet, saved for this exact occasion. You’d probably pair it with the nice silver stilettos you had, the ones with the glitter heel, or the-

“Are you listening?” Val’s voice had cut through your train of thought, and you snapped your head up to look at her. “This is a hush-hush mission, so we don’t need the whole team. You and Walker are out.” 

John had protested this, claiming the team needed his ‘brains’ and his ‘brawn’. A protest to which you had, of course, struggled not to laugh at. He had sent you a glare from across the table after, blue eyes narrowed at yours. 

“My orders are final, Walker. You’ll stay here. And maybe you’ll surprise us all and learn how to lower that ego of yours whilst you’re at it.” 

That shut him up, jaw clenched.

That was two days ago, and now it was just you and John in the tower. You had both managed to stay out of each other’s way for the most part, only really seeing each other at breakfast or when you were both working out in the gym. You had tried to bargain with Valentina, begging to go on the trip instead, taking Bucky’s place or even Alexei’s. She wouldn’t budge. 

It wasn’t exactly like you hated John- you actually got along quite well. Not best friends, but not enemies either. However, if you had to be stuck in a building with someone for days on end, Walker would not be your first choice, because:

He never cleaned up after himself

He always made fun of your movie night choices

And, 

He was clueless in every sense of the word

Sure, he was tactful when the job required him to be, and he was definitely smart enough in a military sense, but at everything else? You hadn’t met someone so clued out on everyday life, which was certainly saying something as you also lived with a literal hundred year old man. 

It would be funny, and slightly endearing if it wasn’t so irritating. On Monday, when you were making dinner, you had asked John to pass you the garlic press. 

He gave you the cheese grater. 

And then yesterday, he was out doing a supply run for the tower and you’d mentioned to him that you were all out of your shampoo. You even sent him a damn picture of the bottle. And when he came back, bags in hand, what did he give you?

2-IN-1 BODY WASH. 

You were unimpressed, to say the least. When you asked him about it, he had grumbled something along the lines of ‘they all look the same to me’, and ‘they all do the same thing, anyway’. You had to force yourself to walk away from him before you said something stupid. You honestly couldn’t fathom how this man was, at one point, THE Captain America. 

And now, as if you weren’t being tested enough, it was day three of your week-long cohabitation sentence and to your dismay, you were unwell. You had woken up with a sore throat, blocked nostrils and your head was pounding with an excruciating headache. 

You were miserable. 

It was pretty unusual for you to get sick- you could probably count on one hand how many times you had been so in the last few years, which only increased your suffering. But, by some magic, you had managed to get out of bed, your blanket thrown over your shoulders like a cape as you trudged your way into the kitchen where John was making himself a cup of coffee. When he turned around to see you, pale and sickly, he pulled a face. “You look like hell. I’ve seen corpses with more colour in them”  

You couldn’t find it in yourself to bite back, moving slowly to sit at one of the stools. Everything in you ached, muscles throbbing with a dull burn. John noticed the way your expression was twisted with pain, and he set his coffee mug down on the side. “Since when do you get sick, anyway? You’re like the poster-girl for good health.” You huffed at this, hands moving to swipe at his cup. You took a sip, and John shot you another glare, objecting to the way you thieved his drink. “Hey! Don’t give me your illness. If you feel as bad as you look, then Christ- I definitely don’t want that” You rolled your eyes, downing the last of the coffee. “I’m sick, John, and this is how you treat me? You should be nicer to me, you know. Or I’ll cough in your face when you’re asleep.” You wouldn’t actually, of course, but maybe it would make him take pity. 

For the rest of the day, you had pretty much been bed-bound on the couch. You had a thick blanket hung over your frail body and your sleeping mask covering your eyes as they had become sensitive to the bright lights and the huge windows scattered around the tower didn’t help at all. You suddenly felt regretful at how often you took being well for granted. 

One thing you did appreciate, though, was that John had seemed to leave you alone for most of the day. You hadn’t seen much of him since this morning, when he left in a rush after you had threatened to infect him, and you had assumed that he spent the day in the gym, or going over mission reports. That was until he walked through the door, plastic bags in hand. You could hear his boots as he walked over to the couch, and you felt him standing over you. He nudged your shoulder with his finger. 

“You awake? Still alive under there, aren’t you?”. You let out a small groan and peeled off your eyemask, eyes squinting against the harsh lights. John grimaced when he saw you again, standing back a little to assess the scene. “You really don’t look great.” He said, as if that wasn’t obvious. You looked down at the bags in his hands, and back up at his face. You raised an eyebrow. 

“I got you some stuff. You know, to help, or whatever” He sat down on the seat opposite, pulling open the bag. “Thought I would be a nice teammate for once, since no-one else is here for you. And I also wouldn’t appreciate being coughed on, so, that too.” You cracked a small smile at this, sitting up as far as your body let you to see his haul. When he began to pull things out, though, this faded a little. 

His haul consisted of:

A bottle of painkillers 

A sporty energy drink

A questionable looking can of chicken soup (your least favourite flavour, by the way)

Two packs of gum

An ice pack

And a chocolate orange flavoured protein bar 

You looked back up at him, eyes blinking slowly. Your face morphed into one of disbelief and honestly, concern. How clueless was he, actually? 

“And what is a sick person doing with… a pack of gum and a protein bar?” He looked over at you quizzically, as if the answer was obvious. 

“Mint to clear the sinuses, and a protein bar to… feed you, obviously” You hummed out, trying not to laugh in his face. “Obviously. I do hate chicken soup, though. You couldn’t have picked up something else? Tomato? Vegetable?” 

“Chicken was all they had. I looked.” You nodded slowly. “And the ice-pack? I’ve got the flu, not a bruised knee. This is the stupidest care package ever, Walker” He had the nerve to look offended, eyes rolling slightly. “This is exactly what you need. A balanced recovery system. Now, are you going to eat or not? You should really eat.” You groaned, the thought of food not exactly appetising to you right now. “Maybe later. Just want to sleep right now”. John sighed, but he reluctantly gave in. He left you his ‘care package’ and let you sleep on the couch for a few hours, busying himself with something else. 

You were in the middle of a- frankly amazing- dream when you heard it- the loud, repetitive beeps. 

The fire alarm. 

You jumped up from the couch, pulling off your eyemask. “Walker?” You called out, voice sounding rough and sick as ever. Your eyes adjusted to the light as you looked around the room and that was when you spotted him, towel in hand, swatting at the alarm. “John, what the hell are you doing?” He spun on his heel when he heard your voice, and he looked as if he was a deer caught in headlights. He hesitated for a second, but then his shoulders slumped, mouth opening to speak. “I burnt the soup.” 

You looked confused, walking towards him. “The chicken soup? I thought you put that in the microwave, how on earth did you burn that?” He sighed again, and the fire alarm finally stopped beeping. 

“Not that soup. I made some vegetable soup. For you. Well, it was supposed to be vegetable soup. Now it’s just… a burnt mess.”  

Your face softened slightly, a small smile ghosting over your lips. “You… made me soup?” 

He glowered at you from across the room, shuffling on his feet. “Only because you’re sick. Don’t expect the princess treatment from me all the time”. 

You smiled again, throwing your hands up in defense. “Hey, I never said that anyway, Walker. But thank you. It- it was a nice thought” You walked into the kitchen, sitting back at your usual spot on the leather stools. He gave you a small smile, reaching behind himself. 

“I, uh, also made you this. Heard it was supposed to help soothe a sore throat.” He awkwardly handed over a cup, watching your face for any reaction. You looked down at it. It was mint tea, with a dash of honey- just how you liked it. You brought it up to your lips, sipping at it slowly. It wasn’t perfect, a little too strong, but you didn’t say this. You gave a thankful smile instead, your throat feeling better already. 

“Thank you, John. Always knew you were a big softy, really”. He grumbled a little at this, but you laughed it off anyway. You sat in a comfortable silence for a while until your stomach growled loudly as you hadn’t eaten all day. 

“I told you you should eat” John said, smugness creeping into his voice. “Well, if you hadn’t burned the soup…”, you teased, hopping off the stool and moving over to the kitchen cabinets. Your hand lingered over the chicken soup, ready to give in and eat in anyway, when you saw it- at the front to the left. 

A tin of vegetable soup. 

You smiled, shaking your head a little. John obviously hadn’t looked far, or if he did, he clearly didn’t see it. 

Because, he was clueless. In every sense of the word.  

all work is my own, i do not give permission for this to be reposted elsewhere without credit. you may not copy or claim as your own.

[3llio]

Blue

2012 Leo x Fem!Reader

AN: It took me embarrassingly long to get into the flow with this one and I actually had to scrap about 200 words in the beginning ߹𖥦߹ anyways I hope you enjoy this @jakiicomics ٩(>ᴗ<)و

──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────

At first, he would be a bit taken aback by your new look simply because he doesn't have a strong opinion on people dying their hair.

But after the initial shock wears off, he’s actually pretty giddy.

Like “Oh my god, she dyed her hair blue because of me!” and he’s got a dopey grin on his face like he's watching his favorite episode of Space Heroes.

As much as he tries to downplay it and be humble, he's very flattered.

He really gets to thinking about the fact that HE’S the reason you dyed your hair- AND it's his signature color late at night while he's trying to go to sleep.

Would you regret staying up til 3 and maybe staining your bathtub? Probably.

But would you ever regret the look on Leo’s face when you walked into the lair with blue hair? Absolutely not.

Upon entering the lair with your signature greeting, you attempt to spot each turtle. Mikey is messing around on his skateboard and calls out a quick hello as he quickly glides past you. He even comments on your new look with a “Sick hair, dudette!”. Donnie was in his lab, not bothering to look up from his laptop as you passed by. And Leo is… Leo is nowhere to be seen, nor is Raph.

You head towards the dojo where you suspect you’ll find your boyfriend and his brother. And to no one’s surprise, they’re both sparing with each other when you take a peek inside.

But to everyone’s surprise, it's Raph who spots you first.

“Oh hey Leo, looks like your girlfriend is here.” Raph talks with a sly grin as he exchanges blades with Leo.

“Yeah, right, Raph. You’re not going to trick me with that again-”

“Hey Leo!” You call out from the door and watch in live action as Leo falters, giving Raph the perfect opportunity to sweep him off his feet. The hot-headed mutant chuckles as he walks out the door a few seconds later, muttering to you a quick “thanks” before he leaves the two of you alone.

By the time you had turned back towards the dojo, Leo was standing in front of you, surprisingly silent.

You chuckled nervously at his lack of expression.

“You… You dyed your hair?” The way he said it made his statement sound like a question. His eyes darted back and forth between your hair and your face for a second before he suddenly became very animated. “I-I mean it looks great- I mean you look great! It's different from your usual look!” His nervousness betrayed him as he gave you a tight smile and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Do you like it? I took some inspiration.” You pointed your finger up and down at him.

“Wait… You dyed your hair blue because of me?!” You could have sworn you heard his voice crack as he pointed back at himself.

Later that night, Leo found himself pacing his room instead of actually sleeping.

He couldn't believe it. You altered your physical appearance because of him! The thought made him feel excited and left him with a feeling of honor. He could only hope to keep inspiring you.

── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

[jynerie]

— "SWEET GIRL"

summary ;; Nanami Kento has a crush on the Bakery’s Assistant Manager– You. feat. ;; Nanami Kento x f! reader themes ;; fluff

Yuji accompanies Nanami to the Bakery one day before training. It was the usual, with the chosen bread of Itadori, but the boy noticed Nanami’s eyes look past the cashier and towards the back, where several of the workers are seen moving around dough and operating the oven, as if searching for someone. When he doesn’t spot whoever it is, Nanami’s face shows slight disappointment before it relaxes back into his usual, stoic face.

“Nanami-sensei?” Yuji asks the moment they left the bakery. 

“Hm?”

“Who were you looking for?” The question is innocent, just curiosity from the boy, but Nanami freezes for a brief second. 

“Ah. A friend of mine.”

Itadori grins, wide and expectant. “Really? Your have a friendNanamin?! What are they like? Do they work there?”

“She works there, as the assistant manager.” Nanami answers quickly, and the boy notices the smile that appears on the older mans’ face. “She’s… hm. How do I say this?” 

Nanami pauses, before smiling, slightly surprising Itadori. “She’s cute.”

Yuji gapes.

Cute. 

That is the first thing Nanami Kento thought the moment he stepped into the bakery and saw you behind the counter. 

Eyes crinkling as you smiled, and– “Hello! How can I help you today?” Your voice? Cute. 

He lists off his order, but his eyes are focused on you. You smile and nod, “Okay. That will be–” you rattle off the price, and he has to kickstart his brain to nod and shuffle through his wallet. He watches you grab the bread, tongs in hand and when you tuck your hair behind your ear as you hand it to him– oh he’s fucked. 

Going to the bakery has become routine at this point. If he isn’t in a rush, he gets black coffee with the sandwich he usually gets, and sits by the window. If he isn’t busy with work or calls, he is busy stealing glances at you. You, the sweet bakery girl, who he learned to be the assistant manager. 

You aren't usually at the cashier, only taking over that specific day when the employee got sick, and instead, he instead tries to spot you in the back, busy making bread or assisting new workers. 

You, who he had never exactly spoken to other than the usual “Hello” and “Good morning”s whenever you are scheduled to handle the counter, and if that doesn’t make him feel a bit like a loser, then maybe it’s because he is. But Kento stays quiet, not wishing to disrupt your life with his small crush on you, and opts to instead admire you during his bakery routines. 

Then you started talking to him. It started as a small, “How’s your day?” when you rang him up, and it snowballed into short conversations over the counter, to you eventually knowing his order by heart, and you, greeting him with a smile and an excited “Kento!”

He would just smile, then, and nod his head in greeting, your own name leaving his lips before he follows it with a “How are you?”

[Name]. 

Oh, how he liked the way it rolled off his tongue. Cute– just like you. 

He comes by the bakery again, after Yuji heads home, in hopes of seeing you again. He spots you behind the counter, and he smiles.

“Good afternoon, Ken!” You smiled widely, already ringing him up..

“Good afternoon .” He returns, voice low and you glance at him. He seems tired, but that’s all you noticed as different today. 

“You alright?” You hum. He shakes his head, “Just tired.”

You purse your lips, tilting your head. “Ooh, rough day already?” 

“Kind of.” 

You simply nod, and he offers a small smile, before heading off to his regular seat by the windows of the bakery. You watch him, a small frown of concern, and you head off to get his order. 

Placing the hot cup in front of him, and the sandwich, you blink when he thanks you in a low voice, “Thank you, sweet girl.” 

You flush, a small squeak of surprise leaving your lips. Eyes wide, you glance up at Kento, only to see him frozen in surprise, hand covering his mouth. 

“Ah. I apologize. It… slipped.” He coughs, and you notice the red that coats his ears and you stammer. “I- uhm, it.. It’s okay. Uhm. Enjoy!” 

And you scramble off to the back, cheeks red and mind racing. 

Meanwhile, Kento sits there, quietly berating himself. 

His feelings began growing, and its beginning to spill out with how quick its developing. It slipped. Truly, it did. He was tired from training Yuji for nearly the whole day and just the sight of you made him relax and– Kento glances to the counter, where you should be, but instead sees another employee. You must have switched the moment you could because of his slip up. 

He sighs. Fuck. 

You, however, are actually crouched behind the counter, your hands on your impossibly red face. I mean?? C’mon, your crush just called you sweet girl?? Oh you’re going to explode. 

Your co-worker and friend, Leigh, stands behind the cashier, eyeing you with a grin.  “He actually said that?”

You groan. “I’m so fucked, Leigh. Do you think he likes me back or did he just really slip up??”

“Him? That stoic guy? C’mon, girl, do you not notice that he only smiles when you're around? He even looks for you when you’re not around.” Leigh just chuckles.  “Shoot your shot, girl. Hell, if he calls you pet names, I think that’s enough of a sign.”

You remove your hands, pursing your lips as you look up at Leigh. “Should I?”

She shrugs. “Why not? Don’t miss this opportunity.” 

You sigh, and take a moment to stare up at the ceiling before hyping yourself up. “Okay. Okay! I’ll… do it. I hope so. Okay, I’ll take over now.” 

Leigh looks up, then to you. There’s a smile on her face, and you don’t notice the hint of mischief in it. “Okay. Goodluck.” 

You sit up, giving her a smile, and you take her place, only to pause. And curse.

Shit, Kento’s already on his way to pay. Pay?? But he already paid. Why is he on his way- Oh god.

Before you could even process it, he’s already in front of you, and you smile, nervously. “Hi. Is… is there something else you need?” 

You see him nod, and he swallows before he meets your gaze. You freeze. There’s nervousness in his eyes but also something like… affection? You swallow. 

“[Name]. I hope I didn’t offend you earlier.” He starts. You quickly shake your head. “No! No. Uhm. You didn’t… offend me.” 

He lets out a sigh. “Thank goodness.” But he doesn’t leave. Kento’s gaze focuses solely on you and God, you feel yourself turn red,  but he continues. 

“I… have liked your for quite a while, [Name]. My slip up earlier is a product of these feelings.” Your heart stops. “But you do not need to return them. If I make you uncomfortable, then I can adjust accordingly–”

“No!” Your hands fly to your mouth and you compose yourself before shyly rephrasing. “No– you don’t… have to adjust. Uhm. I- oh god this is awkward but uhm, I feel the same.”

You see his eyes widen, and you find yourself stumbling over your words. “I liked you for a while too– its why I take the counter job if i could and– ah, well- uhm, yeah.”

He smiles. “You do?”

“I do. It’s, well.” You flush under his gaze. “Yeah. Uhm. Yeah.”

He chuckles, low, and full of relief. “... Then may I invite you out for lunch sometime this week?”

You meet his gaze, and smile softly. “...Yeah. Yeah you can.” 

“Great.” 

You exchange numbers and as he gets ready to leave, you don’t miss the way his eyes soften as he looks at you, nor did he ready you for the way his hand reaches over to tuck a stray strand behind your ear. 

“I’ll text you soon, then, sweet girl.”

You nod, face red. “Yeah. Okay.”

Kento walks out of the bakery, a small smile on his lips and he thinks back to your shy smile and he covers the lower half of his face. 

Cute.

[perseephoneee]

┈ ⟡ crash out [a frank langdon fic]

˖ 𐦍 CHAPTER 1: SOMEONE SAYS 'I DO'

↳ fic masterlist  ↳ ship exchange information ↳ taglist

After returning from rehab and looking to earn forgiveness for his mistakes, Frank makes his way back to the Pitt Trauma Medical Center, where he discovers he's been given a supervisor to oversee his progress.

a/n: finally returning to this after crashing out for the past three weeks. can you even crash out for three weeks? it doesn't matter...i did it anyway

beta'd by the beautiful @eurydiceauxenfers <3

“I’ll bet you $10 this isn’t going to work,” you said, watching as Langdon operated. The patient had been injured on a construction site, and you both were arguing over the best way to treat them. While part of you was well aware that he usually had smart ideas for how to handle these situations, you also knew he responded best to competition.

“Then you are going to be $10 short and feeling very stupid,” Langdon laughed, eyes focused on his work. He seemed a lot more joyful than he was a few weeks ago when you first met him. 

“Don’t be a douche.”

“Can’t,” he shrugged. “Because I just succeeded.”

You bit back a smile as he finished off his work, standing back and gesturing to the nurses to bandage the patient up. You left the room, knowing he’d meet you later, as he finished cleaning up. 

You’d had no idea what to expect when Robby asked you to be Frank’s supervisor. You had heard from the rumor mill that he tended to be arrogant, had a hard time not being in control, and was close with Robby. Oh, and the whole stealing drugs thing. But the man you saw on the first day seemed more desperate and sad than anything. Challenging him in his work was the closest you got to seeing that version you were told of before. 

You had also heard him referred to as ER Ken, which gave you a certain idea of what he was supposed to look like. You were not disappointed. 

He’s married, you thought to yourself, looking at the board in central. You heard his footsteps a second later. You could always tell it was him because the steps always seemed hurried, much like a puppy. He wore a grin.

“You owe me $10.”

You raised a brow at him. “How about I just get you a drink from the vending machine and we call it even.”

Langdon pretended to think about it, even though you knew he had already decided. “Deal.”

“Good. We have a sick child in six.”

Langdon pouted. “There’s an amputation in three.”

“I don’t care,” you snorted, watching as his expression fell. You enjoyed that aspect of being his supervisor, getting to make him do whatever case you wanted. He didn’t complain…much. 

He made sure to stay a few paces behind you as you approached the curtain, announcing yourself as you opened it. A little girl, seven years of age, sat on the bed with her knees to her chest and a rabbit in her arms. She was frowning as her parents sat in the chairs next to her. 

“Hi Chloe, I’m Dr. L/N and this is my colleague Dr. Langdon,” you smiled, closing the curtain behind you. “What seems to be the problem?”

“She says her ears won’t stop hurting, and we gave her Tylenol, but it isn’t doing anything.” Her mom twisted her hands, looking anxiously between you and her daughter. You grabbed your otoscope and got closer to Chloe. You hummed as you looked inside both ears. 

“Any other symptoms?” Langdon asked as you examined her ears. 

“She said her head hurt a little bit, but we thought it was just from the strep,” her dad replied. 

“Strep?”

“She just got over strep throat,” the mom replied. You put away the otoscope.

“Her ears are very swollen, but it doesn’t look like the eardrums are affected. Her strep likely didn’t go away and moved to the sinuses, which gave her an infection,” you explained. You felt bad for the little girl. Her ears were so inflamed that you were shocked she wasn’t crying. “Dr. Langdon, what would you prescribe as treatment?”

“Another round of antibiotics, as well as oxycodone as needed for the pain,” Frank smiled, hands in his pockets. You nodded in agreement. 

“That’s it?”

“That’s it,” he replied. 

“Her ears right now are full of pockets of excess liquid. Her hearing might be slightly affected, but it’d only be temporary. At some point, the pockets will burst and drain out naturally. If they don’t go away and she’s still in pain after finishing the antibiotics, you should come back in.”

“Thank you so much,” the mom smiled gleefully, giving her daughter a kiss on the head. You noticed Frank tense up out of the corner of your eye. 

“We’ll write you a prescription now for everything,” you nodded, opening the curtain and stepping out with Frank behind you. He seemed quieter than before. 

“What’s wrong, Langdon?” you asked, bumping his shoulder. He looked down at you, plastering on a smile. 

“Nothing.”

“I don’t believe that.”

“You never do, cupcake,” he grinned, walking backwards towards the ER entrance. You frowned at the nickname. You don’t remember when he started calling you cupcake, but you didn’t always appreciate it. 

“Where are you going?” you called out, arms crossed.

“STEMI incoming, and I’m going to beat the record.”

“Like hell you are,” you grumbled, following after him. He was like a dog with a bone when he wanted to do something. The STEMI rolled in a moment later. You both ran alongside the gurney as you wheeled it into the emergency OR… 

Langdon did not beat the record (neither did you). But the guy survived, so all in a day’s work. Things managed to calm down a little bit, and you found yourself taking a breather in the break room. You slumped against the wall with a Rice Krispies treat, staring a hole into the opposite wall. The door creaked open, and Frank slumped down next to you.

You sat in companionable silence.

“Wanna see me shotgun this Red Bull?” He asked, holding up the can.

“That sounds like a terrible idea,” you responded. “But yes.”

It went about as poorly as expected. Frank’s scrubs were now covered in the energy drink. But it made you laugh, actually snorting laughing. He was an idiot, one whom you were in charge of.

“Glad my failures entertain you.”

“Always,” 

Frank smiled. You were waiting to see the smile reach his eyes, but you knew progress was slow. You cleared your throat. 

“What happened earlier?”

“Earlier?”

“With the kid. You got kinda…distant.”

Frank looked down at his hands. He played with the wedding band on his finger, twisting it around. You observed the action.

“I just haven’t seen Tanner in a while,” Frank admits. “And it’s hard.”

“You haven’t?” He wore his friendship bracelet everywhere. Frank wore Tanner’s friendship bracelet everywhere, you’d noticed. You knew he had to be the light of his life. “How—?”

“Abby left me,” Frank shrugged. You felt your heart drop. “After the…she was mad at me. For lying. For everything.” Langdon ran a hand through his hair. “I haven’t seen him since. Courts are still figuring out custody.” He takes his ring off, holding it up in front of you both. “And I didn’t want people to know.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, I’m fine,” Frank forced a smile, in a way a totally not fine person would. 

What do you do in this situation? Sit and empathize, you guess. You’ve prided yourself on being good at comforting, but you didn’t always know what to say. 

“Do you mind not telling anyone?” Frank murmured. God, he looked like a wounded puppy with those eyes. 

“Of course I won’t.” You paused for a second. “Would working on the amputee make you feel better?”

“Yes.”

~ * ~

You’re not sure why you did it. Following your co-worker home was never a good idea. Following the mystery that was Frank Langdon was a worse idea. But you couldn’t get that look of his out of your mind, nor the way he held his ring like he wasn’t sure if he should toss it or cherish it. And frankly, you were nosy. 

You follow a little bit behind him as he walks. Luck had it that he didn’t drive to work (your snooping would’ve ended then), but that didn’t leave many options in the closest area. He didn’t ride the bus either. He walked for several blocks, and there were a few close calls where you would roll into the bushes very sleek and cool like a movie spy. You were kidding yourself; you fell into the bushes like a flying squirrel. 

Thoughts of squirrel-like tendencies left your mind as you watched him enter the three-star hotel near the hospital. 

Well, shit.

[sethmcc22]

Our Little Blessing In The End Of The War.

In this Tony and Nat doesn’t die in the end game. Just goes into a small week long coma. K/N means Kid Name.

You and Bucky been dating for a while, and you guys fell in love basically at first sight. You were already an Avenger member before, you tagged alone with Steve during the fight against Tony and others because of the Sovia Courts. You and Bucky fell in love instantly, since then you both been dating.

Current time, It was during the fight of Avengers Infinity War. You were beside Natasha helping her, as Bucky and Steve were near each other shooting guns. Suddenly things went quiet, some of the Avengers yelled for their friends. You and Nat looked at each other confused, you ran to go find Bucky. You ran seeing Steve, he was on one of his knees touching the ground.

“Steve?” Your voice shaking. “Where is- where is Bucky?”

Steve looked up, fear and sadness in his face. Then you realized, what he was touching is Bucky. You look around and see others fading away. Fear set in you now as well. You began to cry.

Weeks went by since that day, you felt depressed all the time, but unusually felt sick a lot especially in mornings. You googled your symptoms, realizing you might be pregnant. You quickly left heading to the store, coming home with a box of pregnancy tests. You took it, just waiting for the results. You felt afraid of what the test would say. After 3 minutes past, you looked a it seeing two pink lines. You took another one because you didn’t believe it, same results positive. You grabbed your phone, instantly calling Steve. Once he answered you asked him to come over it’s urgent. A knock comes at your door, you rush opening the door. You let him in, he left to go into the bathroom as he sat on your couch. You walked towards him with two pregnancy tests, you showed him them.

“Wait.. you’re.. pregnant?” Steve said, confusion in his voice,

You nod your head. “Yes.”

Your eyes glossed over as tears started to form. Steve stood up as he took the tests from your hand setting them down. Steve opened his arms giving you a hug. He rubbed your hand contorting you. You balled your eyes in his arms for almost an hour. Once you finally relaxed, Steve and you began to talk.

“It’s Bucky’s.” You said looking down at the tests. “The baby, it’s his.”

Steve already knew, it was obvious. “I know. I know it is.”

“Steve, what am I supposed to do but he is not here because of the blip I’m afraid.” You exclaimed.

Steve sighed. “Don’t be you know Nat and I will easily help you with this baby despite us not having kids we know a lot. I’ll gladly help you.”

You smiled out of relief. “I just feel-” Your words felt stuck in your throat. “Like I- I feel like I’m not gonna be a good mother.”

Steve rubbed your back. “No, No. I have faith in you. I know you’ll be a good mother.”

You smiled at Steve. “But another thing is, how am I supposed to literally tell my kid why their father isn’t here.”

“Time will tell I guess.” Steve responded.

Your first ultrasound came up, and you cried once you saw the baby for the first time. Nat went with you for this ultrasound because you felt awkward with Steve being there. You showed Steve the photos, he felt amazed when seeing them. You all joked around how the baby has Bucky’s forehead. As your pregnancy continued, you got more ultrasounds. You were about to pop almost. That’s what Nat described you, you laughed at it. It was a late night, your water broke. Lucky Nat was spending the night, she rushed you to the hospital. Steve eventually showing up after you gave birth. You were lying in the hospital bed, tears of joy as you held your baby. You had a baby girl, you smiled with joy. You let Nat and Steve hold her as well.

Eventually the time went by, the End Game came, they’ve been collecting stones for couples weeks. Eventually getting the stones all ready, you stayed with the baby at home. You just worried, Steve got your hopes on telling you they might be able to bring Bucky and everyone we all lost back. You hope so, your daughter is now 5 years old. She’s sitting playing with toys as you made dinner. You just couldn’t help to worry.

A knock at the door startled you.

“I’ll get it mommy!” Your daughter ran to the door. You followed behind her.

You both opened the door seeing Steve standing there. “Hi uncle Steve!”

“Hi K/N.” Steve replied.

You looked at him as he smiled brightly. Bucky walked up behind Steve. Steve went inside as well Bucky did. You hugged Bucky tightly. Crying in his arms. Eventually one time, Steve did tell your daughter where her daddy went, who he was. All he claimed was he was kidnapped that’s it. Bucky looked at K/N and smiled.

“Daddy?” She turned her head looking at Bucky.

“Yes- it’s me.” Bucky had tears already in his eyes but now even more from seeing his daughter.

She ran hugging Bucky as he hugged her back. From that day, Bucky always made sure he was there. It was a dream come true you thought, your boyfriend and your guys kid. You both got married shortly after, having your daughter as the flower girl because she begged to be a flower girl anyways. Nat was your brides maid, Steve was the groomsmen.

Thank you for reading. I know it’s not the best but I hope you enjoy!!

[lotus-holloway]

Lotus had stood beside Juno like the pillar of strength she’d always been for the people she loved. That was her place—shoulders squared, jaw set, spine straight—anchoring Juno as she cracked open her most private trauma for the world to dissect. It was bravery most people would never understand. And Lotus was there, exactly where she was needed.

But her mind… her mind was elsewhere.

She’d never admit it—not to Juno, not to Claire, not even to herself out loud. Not when they needed her present, steady, unshakable. But beneath the surface, she was drifting. Drowning in thoughts of Ryan. No matter how she tried to claw her way out, his name stayed lodged in her chest like a shard of glass.

She wanted to hate him. God, she tried. She reminded herself of how he walked away. How he said he loved her one night and started seeing someone else the next. How he said he’d protect her—always—and then left because her father's sins were too big for him to stand beside.

And yet, it wasn’t just him. It was Sam, too. That little girl had stolen a piece of her heart the first time she’d wrapped her arms around her neck and whispered, “I missed you.” Letting go of Ryan meant letting go of both of them. And Lotus didn’t know how to do that.

Realizing her thoughts had wandered again, she barely registered that they’d pulled into the long, winding drive that led up to the house. The silence in the car had stretched the entire ride, punctuated only by the occasional chime of Juno’s phone blowing up after her public declaration. People were calling her a hero. She was one. And Lotus had told her that—again and again. She just wondered if Juno knew that the woman beside her, the one who seemed so composed, was fraying at every seam.

Lotus was the strong one. The unshakable one. But what did it mean if that strength was an act? A mask she wore so no one would see how broken she really was?

They were just getting out of the car when she felt it: the familiar buzz of her own phone. She didn’t check it immediately. Part of her hoped it was Ryan. Maybe—finally—he’d ask to see her. To talk. To say he was wrong. She told herself it was just for closure. Just to finish things properly.

But deep down, she knew better. She didn’t want closure. She wanted him.

Except it wasn’t him.

It was the one person she never wanted to hear from.

Dax.

Her stomach turned as she played the voicemail, already expecting some new manipulation, some thinly veiled threat she could hand over to the police. But this message… this was something else.

“Hey little flower, I know you're still mad at me, but I heard what your friend had to say and quite honestly, I'm hurt that you would believe those lies. Is that why you stopped talking to me? That's why you decided daddy wasn't a good man anymore? Because of some lies out of a whore’s mouth?”

Her blood went cold.

“You know what she said was all bullshit. She got drunk, fucked some guy, and forgot about it, and now she's trying to get attention by saying it was worse than it was and throwing me into this mess. See, my temper’s getting the best of me again. I just wanted to tell you that I miss you, baby girl. Call me so I can explain, please.”

She stared at the screen, the recording finished, her thumb hovering over the delete button but not pressing it.

It was pathetic. The message. The manipulation. The denial. The rage barely masked as remorse.

And yet… it wasn’t just his voice that made her feel sick. It was hers, too—the one in her head that still longed for Ryan. The one that missed him even as her father’s evil clung to her name like tar. The one that kept wondering what she had done wrong, why she was always the one people decided was too much, too complicated, too broken to stand beside.

She let out a hollow breath. The kind that rattled in her ribs.

The truth slammed into her all at once, cold and sharp:

Ryan didn’t leave because he stopped loving her. He left because she reminded him of everything he was afraid of—violence, mess, trauma. And Dax? Dax was the reason any of that fear existed in the first place.

Maybe it wasn’t Ryan who ruined her.

Maybe it was always her father. The man who broke her world so completely that even the people who claimed to love her ran when the dust settled.

And as much as she wanted to scream, cry, break every mirror in the house, she didn’t.

She just stood there—still, silent—and hit delete.

Because if the world was going to keep treating her like she was built from glass, they were about to learn just how sharp she could be.

[the-sick-habit]

Statistically Speaking, I Think I'm Fucked

Modern AU | Ellie x Fem!Reader | College setting | On a journal

What's Up by 4 Non Blondes

Chp 3: "i just really like jumping into it, i guess"

Thursday, August 28 Bio Lab

So I haven’t texted Riley back yet, but I will once class is over. I haven’t even told anyone about it, and don’t plan to honestly. I already know what they’re gonna say, because that’s exactly what my brain is telling me, too.  

I don’t know, I’m just worried that she’ll bring up the past or something. Or that she’ll do some grand gesture thinking that it’s gonna revert everything back to normal. I mean, it would make sense, because I used to let her do that bullshit to me. Hope it doesn’t happen again.

Fuck. So much for time heals.

Later, Bio Lab still

I’m thinking maybe I can just hang out with her. Stay outside on the porch or in the kitchen.

Later, later still the same, during our fifteen minute break

Library girl is here, still can’t write down her name.

Don’t get it twisted, I KNOW how to spell it…unless her parents are like, name connoisseurs (I had to look this up) or something. It just feels a little too personal, y’know? Or you don’t, ‘cause you’re just a piece of paper. Anyways.

We’re partnering up this time. I’m paired up with this dude that definitely shoots bears and looks like his boots curl in on themselves, Paul. Kind of alright, a little weird. Gets along great with the others. But I don’t know. He’s a little weird, he giggles a lot.

As if I’m not weird, too.

Later, later Bio Lab at the table trying not to stare

Alright, the last entry was a little off. I’m fucking staring at her. God.

I texted Riley back, even though I feel like my heart is gonna rip out of my fucking chest. Why am I doing this?? It’ll be fine. Besides, it’s not every day that the person you thought you were gonna spend your life with leaves you like you’re nothing.

Can’t even tell Dina, she’s gonna kill me.

Still the same godforsaken day In my dorm, trying not to change into different clothes

Before I even go out, let me just write down some things as a gentle reminder.

She left and fucked me UP

GHOSTED ME

Is acting like things are okay

What the fuck am I doing?!

I told library girl that I’ll see her at the study session today, and she waved at me and said, “See you there.” like she wholeheartedly believed me.

Maybe Riley will apologize this time.

Sometime today, or tonight, whenever In my truck, can’t get out yet

I fucking knew it. I knew it was a bad fucking idea. I’m so fucking stupid. She did it again. And this time tried to make it seem like it was MY problem, and even dragged Dina into this. Which – surprise surprise – gives me this sick feeling in my gut.

Why??? Why would I think it’d be okay again???

What the hell did I expect??? Fuck!!!

I forgot Dina could see my location, but she couldn’t guess that I was with Riley in her stupid fucking house. And I can’t lie to her, I can’t say shit. So I just told her I got busy. She’s gonna clock that so fast but I can’t care right now.

Riley’s texting me, she’s saying she didn’t mean for it to come out like that??!?! Didn’t even WRITE sorry!! Okay, great fucking timing ASSHOLE!! I’m so fucking done with this, with this town, with everything, I just need to LEAVE, it’s too much and now I’m

Friday, August 29 Too fucking early for the night I had

Didn't finish last entry. Whatever. I woke up to, like, two messages form Dina and a handful from Riley. There’s one from Cat.

And then Jessie’s dumbass asked me if I had an extra pencil. We don’t even have the same class to be exchanging goods like that. And he texted me that at FOUR IN THE MORNING.

Yeah, definitely waking up and answering that question diligently after the cry I had.

My fucking head hurts.

Later, Physics Lecture

Cat actually sat next to me this time, she came in after I did. It was kinda nice. I was answering her text when she did, she’d told me good morning and asked if I wanted to have lunch with her.

She was joking around, saying shit that made me laugh. Helped me forget. Cat’s in the bathroom right now, so I’m writing as fast as I can.

That’s why I hate sitting next to people that I just met—or just anyone in general. Can’t write shit in peace without worrying they’re peeking over my shoulder to see what I’m writing about.

Riley @11:23 PM “didn’t mean to make you upset ellie, promise. just thought we could talk about it.” Riley @6:21 AM “call me when you get the chance, yeah?”

See, this is the bullshit I get myself into. And it’s so dumb, if I told Dina she’d rip my head off. If I tell Sarah?! I don’t know.

I can’t deal with this right now.

Fuck, she’s is back.

Later later, In my dorm

I went to lunch with Cat after class. It was kinda nice, but I felt a little bad because I had the hardest time concentrating on what she was talking about. I think she was telling me about tattoos, how she wanted to start doing that but had no idea how.

Beats me why she was talking to me about it. But we had sandwiches and chips, the good old American lunch.

And then something EMBARRASSING happened.

“Yeah, I dunno, tattooings pretty cool. Just don’t know how I’d feel about leaving something permanent on someone. Seems kinda...sketch.” and I was just talking, letting the words flow out while I picked at my ham and cheese sandwich. And the lettuce was sad.

Cat leaned in on the table, and I looked up to see that she was giving me this small grin. And when she spoke, it was suddenly really hard to swallow my bite, “I see what you mean. But there’s just something I like about that. Being that close to someone’s skin. You wouldn’t mind if I did that to you, would you?”

And I tried to say something, then a piece of my SANDWHICH CAME OUT OF MY MOUTH.

UUUGHHH. But she just grinned at me, like it was the right answer. So, dumbass for the win?

So there was that. We ended up saying bye, and she hugged me. Didn’t know what to do, and I hated how sweaty and jittery I felt after. I guess she wants to hang out again at her dorm. Not really thinking too much about that.

But anyways.

Dina texted me, saying there’s a party that she was invited to off campus and wanted me to go. Apparently Jessie’s going too, but I had to let her down. She’s not even pushing me about where I was yesterday, which I super appreciate. So that made me feel a little bad.

I just can’t win apparently.

But I guess I’m okay to start talking about what happened. As best as I can, anyways, because that shit was a couple of hours long so we’ll see.

THE GREAT TRAGEDY (FEATURING ELLIE WILLIAMS)

I drove over to Riley’s place, where she used to live. It was crazy, because it looked the same almost. You know? Still had the flower beds up front that I’m sure her mom still tended to. One of the flowers was messed up, and it made me smile ‘cause it’s the SAME damn flower every time.

Even half a year later. And I’m sure it’s because it’s right next to the walkway.

I’ll admit, it took me a while to get out of the truck for a couple of minutes. I had parked on the side of the road for easy escape. Even when I was nervous as hell I could parallel park. My palms were sweating and shit. So lame. Kind of. Not really.

I finally got out and walked up to the house. Riley’s house. Obviously. And you know what, as soon as those stupid sprinklers came on and sprayed my jeans I knew that was just a fucking bad omen. I should have walked away, but I didn’t.

And then on the porch that scuff was still there, the one that Riley’s boot made ‘cause we were…yeah.

I had to shake it off, and my stupid hand was trembling a little when I went to go knock on the wooden door twice. And for some reason I thought about Joel, and his face, and how he’d probably be disappointed that I was here. Jesus.

BUT ANYWAYS.

I knocked on that fucking raggedy ass door. And it didn’t take much for someone to answer. It was actually her mom, and for a second I felt so awkward and lame. She seemed to do a double take when she saw me, and I felt myself shift.

“Hey, Ellie!” she exclaimed, which SURPRISED me. And I don’t know if it showed on my face.

I waved back and then stepped in, and she actually leaned in to give me a hug. Which, I guess in retrospect, was nice. And I gave her a half-assed one back, “Hey.”

“Riley!” she yelled out from the top of the stairs. “Ellie’s here!”

Don’t get me wrong, her mom knew about what was happening between Riley and me. We were really close friends. Met in middle school, were friends for a while. And then in high school we dated. Whatever. She left when we graduated, had her own life to figure out. The works. But the whole time her mom was very supportive, invited me to family events and shit.

So I walked over to the steps that led upstairs. I stayed right there while her mom talked to me, asking me what I’ve been up to and shit. She told me that I’ve grown, look better.

Didn’t know if she really meant it or she was just saying it ‘cause I’m standing at my ex’s house like an idiot.

And I tried to remind myself that she was my best friend first.

But Riley finally came down the stairs, and I tried not to look TOO nervous. But she fucking caught me. Of course she did.

She walked down lazily, her arm swinging back and forth with each step and gave me that grin that made me smile back automatically – half assed or not, “Look at you, nervous as hell.”

I scoffed, that was like my defense mechanism, “Not nervous.” And it was so LAME.

And Riley looked at me up and down and then pointed at my goddamn hands like it was the most obvious thing in the world, “You’re strangling your fingers like they owe you money.”

And fuck, that made me laugh and roll my eyes. I wanna say I put my hands back to my sides leisurely and cool, but I don’t know, “Yeah, yeah, well, I’m here.”

I didn’t expect this meeting to end up like this. I didn’t expect her to ghost me the way she did and for me to come crawling back to her as if nothing happened. What I DID expect? A more sincere Riley, an apology, an explanation.

Maybe she needed some warming up? FUCK NO.

She never once brought it up. Which is what I wanted, right?? I wanted to keep it going, get our friendship back to how it used to be. But how the hell could I want that when every word that comes out of her fucking mouth makes me hold my breath? Waiting for something that sounds remotely like remorse? I’m so fucked. I WAS so fucked.

Through the awkwardness I felt in my lungs, I sat in her room on the floor. And it was a little hard, not gonna lie. There’s a lot of memories in that place. Shit we did, shit I WANTED to do, words and actions and—

Okay let me not get all poetic about this bullshit.

It felt better knowing her mom was downstairs. I knew Riley wasn’t gonna hit me or anything, but hearing her bustling in the living room and the TV on (she still loves watching Turkish soap operas) didn’t make me feel so trapped. Like, I could concentrate on the foreign language whenever Riley said anything that made my heart race. Which was way too often.

But we talked about her life out there in Los Angeles, like it was some cool thing. And sometimes—I don’t think she mean it—it felt like she was hinting that staying in Jackson was…not the move. And that made me feel some kind of way. Like, it made me not wanna be in her room anymore.

“Yeah, I’m so glad I moved when I did.” She said, and she was fishing through her bag. The same one from her closet where we’d hide the weed. And I was eyeing it, because she gave me that stupid grin that reminded me of what we used to be.

“You gonna have some, or are you gonna leave me hanging?” she took out a joint, and I don’t know about you but I’m down for a smoke. Just not with an ex.

So why the fuck did I accept it?

Because I kept TRYING to convince myself that she’s just my friend now. But no, it’s not like that anymore. Riley isn’t my friend. She’s an ex who USED to be my best friend. I don’t fucking work that way apparently.

“Yeah, why not?” and I went to sit closer to her while she lit it up.

Like, this is a recipe for disaster. I’m so fucking glad I don’t like her anymore like that. If I had wanted to kiss her and shit, she could’ve gotten that from me. And it’s fucking crazy what happens next. Like, I don’t even want to write it but I need to REMEMBER.

That way I won’t let it happen again.

We start smoking, she cracks the window open ‘cause she forgot to do that—she’d always forget, even now. I asked her if her mom’s okay with it now, and Riley basically said her mom knows she smokes and doesn’t mind, “As long as we don’t stink up the whole house.”

And I started feeling it after the second hit. Just to clear it up, I wasn’t INHALING it. I think Riley caught on but she didn’t say anything about it. But I was getting a little fuzzy a little while.

I kept talking, ‘cause if I didn’t I thought my heart was gonna explode. And maybe I shouldn’t have kept talking. Or maybe I shouldn’t have even been there in the first place.

I think that’s when Dina texted me again, and I looked at it. I hated how she didn’t use emojis this time.

Dina: “hey, we’re at the library. just let me know ur ok.”

And I just thumbs up her message and left it at that. THAT’S when the bullshit started, ‘cause Riley noticed. Of course she’d finally bring it up when I’m fucking high, of course she would. I mean, GOD I know Dina texted me first and then she saw it, but, it’s just – this had me fucked up and still does.

“You still talk to Dina?” she asked me with that voice she has, like the one that makes you feel like you’re in trouble but it’s not obvious, so you’re just wondering if you’re imagining it. Damn, basically my whole dating relationship with her.

“Yeah.” And I couldn’t say more than that. I just stared at the carpet we were sitting on, picking at the lint. The same carpet she laid me on and…FUCK (I guess literally).

“She still confused?”

And that’s when I had to look up at her, and she had that look on her face that made my stomach drop, “What?”

It wasn’t even fair, because I was fucking high. Like she waited for me to be high to push my fucking buttons.

“Y’know, like, about what she likes.”

And I knew what she was talking about. But this time I wasn’t the same person anymore. I don’t know if she knew that. Even though I was sitting here like a dumbass, “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.” And I shrugged, looking back at the carpet.

That just slipped out, alright?

And she got DEFENSIVE. I could see her moving from the corner of my eyes, and I’d be lying if I said that didn’t make me stiffen up, “Woah, alright. Calm down Ellie.”

That pissed me the fuck off, “No, I’m calm Riley. I just said I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I could feel my hands start to shake while I moved them around, I could feel my face start to lose composure. I hated it.

It sounded like I shut her up, but then she talked again, “You know I never liked her, right?”

I HAD to look at her this time. And damn, the look she had on her face? How could it possibly make me feel any worse than what I already felt. I knew she was toying with me, but I couldn’t PROVE it. “You know what? No.” this time I glared at her.

“Why the fuck are you talking about Dina?” There. I did it, I talked back to Riley and the look on her face was so satisfying.

I don’t know if she was genuinely surprised with how I answered, or how quick I was to talk back. But I managed to make her quiet for a couple of seconds. That’s when I should’ve walked away, but then she said this. Like she knew that’s what would shut MY ass up.   

“I just thought, I don’t know…that you were talking to her while I was gone. As more than friends.” Her voice was stupid soft.

I hated how that stopped me on my tracks. I was looking at her, and she had her head down, knees up. I don’t know how high she was, but all I knew was that I felt my anger leave quick as hell.

“What do you mean?”

I should’ve left, I should’ve left, I should’ve left.

She proceeds to tell me that she thought I was talking to Dina behind her back while she was in LA. Like, ROMANTICALLY. And it was like pulling fucking teeth to get her to say it. The more she pushed back the more it pissed me off. How are you gonna invite me over here, to talk about shit that should’ve been talked about when we were together?!

And why did I let her?!

ALSO, that wasn’t even something I WANTED her to talk about.

God, I was so fucking frustrated. I may have or may not have cussed her out while walking out of her room. It was so embarrassing though because her mom heard us arguing in her room, and when I opened the door she was there. Her mom had this look of concern on her face that made me feel guilty, and I’m pretty damn sure she smelled the weed, too.

The kicker?? Her mom didn’t let me go!!!

She said I was high, and to sit my ass on the couch. I’m such a bitch too, ‘cause I told her as long as Riley stayed the fuck away from me that I’d stay.

“Fuck you, Ellie!” I heard Riley yell out from the top of the stairs while I went down the stairs, holding onto the railing. Her mom stayed up there with her, and I heard these angry hisses from her that I didn’t even try to make out.

But I just didn’t care at that point. My heart was beating so fast, and I couldn’t concentrate that good because I was high and embarrassed, and I just—I was feeling shit.

I had to wait for the high to wear off for Riley’s mom to let me go. She didn’t try talking to me about anything, just gave me something to eat. Which I did begrudgingly. It was a little bowl of ice cream, the same stupid flavor Riley likes. And it’s mint chocolate chip. UGH. I don’t even like it that much.

That’s why I went to my dorm so late yesterday, too. I thought about going over to Dina’s. But decided not do.

And YEAH, alright. I cried okay?? DAMN.

But can you blame me?! No, no you can’t.

A little later once my hand stopped cramping Still in my dorm around 7-ish

I texted Dina back. Ended up telling her where I went yesterday. She hasn’t answered back, but a part of me highly doubts she was upset about it. She’s probably getting ready for that party she invited me to. Which is funny, ‘cause it’s not her party.

Also, Cat wanted to hang out this weekend so we’ll see. It’s a little too much right now. I mean, she DOES make me laugh and it’s nice talking to her. She’s cool, but not really what I wanna concentrate on right now. Especially when I still need to do my homework.

Which, actually, I have a lot of.

It’s mostly just time consuming. And who the fuck assigns discussion posts for biology?!

Oh, Dina texted back. She definitely wants a debrief. Called me a bitch for not telling her, too.

Half an hour later, Behind a bookcase like a creep

She’s here!! The library girl is here. Why am I freaking out?! It’s literally no big deal. She’s just sitting there with her little book. Just, I don’t know, doing her thing!!

And like an idiot I texted Dina.

“I came to the library to study and she’s here, what do I do?!”

“who?”

“your nursing friend!!”

“then go sit down you weirdo???!”

I’m so dumb.

Still here, A little better now, sitting across from her

I ended up sitting next to her.

She was so nice, looked up at me when I approached her with my shit. I saw a flicker of recognition go on her face before she gave me this soft smile. It made me feel more at ease when I got to the table, “Is it okay if I sit here?”

And right away she moved her stuff (thick ass book, some highlighters and flashcards) out of the way. It wasn’t even that much, she didn’t have to do it that quick. Even mumbled an apology with that little smile that I couldn’t help but smile back to.

“Nah, you’re good.” I had to tell her that, ‘cause she was acting as if SHE was intruding in my space. Which, weird, but okay.

I finally got my things ready then sat down, and we stayed like that for a bit. I didn’t expect her here, but I’m glad she is.

She’s still in front of me, in our usual seats at the table. But she’s so concentrated on her work, it’s almost like I’m not even here. Can’t believe I freaked out on Dina too. It wasn’t that bad.

Which, honestly, probably fucked me over because she just texted me again.

OKAY WHAT THE FUCK?!

“don’t be a little weirdo, she’s really nice and into girls”

“and I wanna know that because?????????”

“.-.”

She’s fucking insane. But I better get back to my homework and put on some music. Being in front of her makes me wanna get my shit done. With all her clacking on her calculator and scribbles.

Still at the library, She’s gone to the restroom

You know, she’s actually pretty cool. I mean, in a ‘let my actions and looks do all the talking’ kind of cool. The quiet was a nice contrast to all the other words I just heard yesterday and earlier today.

I haven’t texted Cat back, but I think that this point she just knows I’m not a huge person on texting. I mean I’ll READ them, but, I won’t answer unless it’s super urgent. Or if you’re calling me.

But she got up from her seat when I was halfway from taking out my lab assignments for bio, and I looked at her. Didn’t mean to, but she started to talk in a hushed voice, “I’ll be right back, can you watch my stuff for me?” and then before I could say anything she quickly added, “If that’s okay.”

And I nodded, told her it was fine. I mean, I don’t feel inclined to steal her nursing books and homework. I mean, maybe her laptop, but whatever. What am I gonna find in there? Medicine shit?

I didn’t mean to peek, but I saw that she was working on some dimensional analysis stuff. Probably the same crap that Dina was stressing out about and wouldn’t listen to my advice on.

She’s back, can see her walking back.

Later, In my dorm

I’m so glad I didn’t go to that party.

Going to the library was the move for sure.

Anyways, we ended up working on the lab worksheets – which was kind of cheating, but whatever. She saw that I’d taken them out and then casually murmured something along the line of, “Oh yeah, I forgot about that.” A nursing student forgetting about lab work? But she also said it as if she didn’t mean to say it out loud.

I didn’t say anything to her when she said that, which I kind of regretted. I guess that could’ve been a good moment to talk to her. She put her pen down and started to rustle through her bag, and I could hear her pens and stuff. I didn’t even MEAN to say this, but I asked her if she wanted to work on it with me.

And then she looked at me with these eyes, the ones where she seemed unsure if this was a joke or not, “Is that…allowed?”

GOD WHO THE HELL IS SHE?!

I don’t know how I looked when she asked me that. I knew I wanted to laugh, but instead I shrugged and said, “No, but why not?”

Which…is kind of what I also told Riley, but whatever.

“You won’t snitch right? ‘Cause that would suck.” I decided to tease her a little, see what she was gonna say.

“That really would, huh.” She murmured and I had to look up from my worksheet to look at her face. She looked concentrated as she looked through her worksheet. And I just HAD to ask.

“Would you?”

She looked at me, almost amused, and her eyes felt like they were boring into mine. Honestly it was hard to look away, “Now why would I do that, Ellie?” and she asked in this…I don’t know, cute tone. But it had my brain short-circuit because this is the most I’ve heard her talk.

And she sounds like this? Jesus.

I tried to laugh, but I think it just sounded like a scoff. Whether or not it did, she smiled at me and looked down at her worksheet. And I didn’t mind, because I also looked down at my own worksheet.

Fuck.

But we just filled it out. I learned a bit more about her. That she’s also in the nursing program (guessed correctly), but she’s doing her associates while Dina is doing her bachelors. She’s from Chicago, so that was interesting. Wondered why she was here, but I didn’t pry, just thought it was cool. Ended up telling her I’m actually from Boston.

And she didn’t pry either.

“Oh, I guess that makes sense.” That’s what she said. I think I looked confused and even taken aback because she continued talking. She almost sounded a little panicked, and I tried to keep a straight face, “It just seems like it, y’know? Like, you have that demeanor.”

“Demeanor?” I repeated that slowly, because, who USES that word? Nerds, I guess. UGH, just kidding, she’s really cool and cute.

And before she could spaz out – she looked like she thought I was condemning her – I put my hand up and this time let myself laugh a little. No harm right? “No, you’re good, I get it.” And then with a shrug I also said, “You don’t seem like the Jackson type either.”

She pressed her lips together in a thin line, like she was trying not to smile too hard and I thought it was cute, “Yeah, small towns and all.”

I snickered and felt compelled to do the same thing with my lips, “Small towns.” I agreed.

A little bit later (like late as FUCK), Still in my dorm but this time thinking about you

It’s crazy because I’ve only known you for a couple of days. Seen you around in classes and the library. And I feel lame and crazy because I’m in my dorm, feeling more right tonight than I have in all the others since I’ve been here.

But anyways, I ended up texting Riley back after I got here from the library. I don’t want to call her, so I don’t plan on doing that any time soon. Or at all. I just told her that I was sorry for…all that cussing out at her, and for the fact that her mom had to get involved in it.

And crazy thing is, she texted me back pretty quickly after that.

“it’s okay, things got intense. i came at you pretty strong. can we talk?” “i can go over this time.”

I’m definitely gonna have to talk to Dina about this. Or someone. Because I don’t know what do to. Well, I DO. I just tell her I’m done, I can’t talk to her anymore. That she keeps dragging me down this stupid hole I’m tired of climbing out of.

What would you do? You don’t seem like the type to get into crap like this.

Saturday, August 30 At Dina’s and Jessie’s late at night

They’re making me play a board game, but rustling around the kitchen for snacks right now. Might have enough time to write down the hangout I had with Cat today.

It wasn’t even that much time. Just about…okay, fuck, most of my day. But I had fun and I thought it was worth it. The sucky part is that I kept thinking about that thing with Riley. She didn’t text me back, probably waiting. Or I’m just hoping she gave up.

But anyway, I hanged out with Cat at her dorm. She sat pretty close to me, her thigh brushed against mine whenever she laughed at something I said or leaned over to tell me a story. I wasn’t used to it so of course I fucking fumbled a little. We talked a little more about what she wanted to tattoo.

After a while I got comfortable enough to let her look at my arm. She’d insisted even after I told her it wasn’t something that never interested me.

“It’d look good right here.” She murmured with a small grin, and her hands held my arm with a little more confidence that I anticipated. She turned it around, and her thumb ran along my skin.

I had to look away, ‘cause I felt this stupid heat coming up my neck and I knew I was getting red, “Mm, never really thought about it.”

And when I looked back at her, she was already looking at me. Like she has this plan in her eyes that I can’t see. Is that normal?

“You should. It’d be hot.”

I might have short-circuited right there. I tried to come up with someone normal, average, or best  as a response.

I laughed and shook my head, looked down at my arm just as she turned my wrist for my palm to face upwards, “And that’s supposed to convince me.”

I think I saved face a little, until I looked at her and she turned her head upwards to look at me, “What. You need something else?”

I’m pretty sure my swallow echoed all over the room.

Did anything happen? No. It really didn’t. Because writing this shit now, it sounds like some rom-com crap. I don’t even remember how it derailed off from that moment. Just that I’m completely fucked when it comes to pretty girls.

And then the next part of the hangout, she began to draw on my arm. It wasn’t anything stupid, or little doodles here and there. She actually began to sketch out a tattoo she thought would look cool on me while we talked about class, or whatever thing that came to mind.

I let her do most of the talking, didn’t really feel up for it. But it was nice getting out of my head for a while.

Things I Learned About Cat

She has a dog back at home named Toto (funny name, I really tried not to crack up. It was too late, she smacked my arm when she realized my shoulders were shaking)

Her favorite color is green, which happens to be my favorite color too. Except hers is that weird bright one. I’m more of a deep green.

She didn’t intend to cut her hair that short, it just so happened that way because the barber misinterpreted how short she wanted it. It was already chopped before she could say anything (“Couldn’t you FEEL the scissors on your neck?” and she smacked me for that one, too.)

She went river rafting and bungee jumping with her friends last month. Which sounds fucking awesome. Gotta do that too.

Okay, where the hell are Jessie and Dina?

Author's note: Not sure if that's longer than the other ones. Not that I was keeping track necessarily. But the whole point of view thing for readers (you) I'M TRYING OKAY.

Also I know the story is slow but ummm I do slow-burn. Sorry sweaty. :/ I should probably add that to the masterlist thing.

--

chp 2 <- this chapter -> chp 4: ????

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<3 beginning of hall of fame <3

@joonsaloe @kylorey25

<3 end of hall of fame <3

[sequinsmile-x]

I Knew You'd Linger Like a Tattoo Kiss - Neck Kisses

A series of unrelated one-shots and mini fics about the many types of kisses Aaron and Emily share.

-x-

Hi besties,

Just another short, very sweet, thing about our two idiots.

This fulfils the 'neck kisses' prompt.

Please see the master list for a full list of tags, and the list of prompts for this series.

As always, let me know what you think <3

-x-

Words: 1.1k

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

They rarely had the chance to just exist. 

There was always something going on. There was always a soccer match on a Saturday morning, or an invitation to a night out from Penelope. There were always chores and things to do around their, new,  house.  

There was always work. Their jobs were hectic, the nature of their work as unpredictable as it was busy, and it took up more of their time than she thinks either she or Aaron would like. She saw it in his eyes sometimes, saw the guilt that would linger there if he told her he’d have to stay late, and she knew it was a hangover from his marriage to Haley, a lingering fear that he was repeating the mistakes of his past and doing damage to their marriage, too. It was something he struggled with even more now that she no longer worked for the FBI. She’d started to work for Interpol again shortly after she and Aaron became official. It was the right choice for them, not just because of the rules they’d broken to be together in the first place, but because she didn’t feel like herself anymore after everything with Ian. The job change had been what she’d needed, and it had allowed her to be the partner she knew Aaron deserved. 

She grimaces as another wave of nausea rolls through her body, and she sips her ginger ale, hoping it will settle her stomach even just a little bit, and she smiles, her hand low on her still flat belly as she rubs her thumb back and forth below her belly button. They’d only known she was pregnant for a few days, and the disbelief hadn’t quite worn off. The feeling that this wasn’t real, that she’d wake up from a dream alone and in Paris, dead to almost everyone, still lingering under her skin, making her itch in a way she hoped would never fade because she never wanted to take any of this for granted. 

Life was about to get even busier, and she couldn’t wait. 

She loved their beautifully hectic life; she wouldn’t want to change it for anything, but when she had the chance to spend a lazy day with her husband, it was an opportunity she always grasped with both hands. 

Jack was away at camp for the weekend, so they had the house to themselves, and Emily intended to make the most of it. 

“You okay, sweetheart?” 

She turns to look at him, smiling at his slightly rumpled hair and the sleepy look in his eyes. They’d got out of bed hours ago to make breakfast, and they’d been snuggled on the couch ever since, wrapped up around each other as they watched movies they’d seen countless times before. She hums and sips her ginger ale again before she puts the can down on the coffee table and lies back down, snuggling up against him again, her back against his chest. 

“Your kid hates me, I think,” she grumbles good-naturedly, turning her head just enough to stamp a kiss against his lips, “I feel like crap.” 

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles, his lips against her neck as he presses a kiss there, “Is there anything I can do?” 

“I’ll be okay,” she says, reaching for his hand and placing it over her stomach, “It will all be worth it in the end.” He kisses her neck again, and she can feel his smile against her skin when it makes her shiver. “Don’t get any ideas, mister,” she says, tilting her head to look at him, “Sex is what got me into this mess in the first place.” 

He chuckles and kisses her neck again before stamping his lips against her cheek, “We should tell Jack soon,” he says, thinking out loud more than anything, “He’s going to notice you’re sick.”

“When he gets home?” She offers, smiling as she thinks about it. Jack had been asking for a baby brother or sister since before she and Aaron had even discussed it themselves. He’d asked her when they told him they were together, his expression hopeful as he asked if it meant he’d be a big brother one day. She still laughed when she thought about it - about the look of panic that had flashed in Aaron’s eyes at his son’s question, about how he smiled at her when their eyes met over Jack’s head. 

She’d always wanted this, had always wanted to be part of a family like the ones she always used to look at with envy, and now she had it, and it was everything she always knew it would be and more. 

“He’ll be so excited,” Aaron says, and she nods, humming in response as she settles back against him. 

“I got him a t-shirt,” she says idly, twisting Aaron’s wedding ring around his finger, “It says ‘big brother’ on it,” he pulls back to look at her, love and adoration she still wasn’t quite sure she deserved painted across his face, the way he felt about her stitched into every fine line and his dimples. It makes her blush, but not with embarrassment, but joy because she knew she looked at him the same way too. “I saw it in the store and couldn’t resist. I thought we could give it to him when we tell him.” 

“He’ll love that,” Aaron replies, kissing her shoulder and then her neck, smiling when she rolls her eyes at him, “I love you.” 

She captures his chin to hold him in place, to stop him from tickling her neck again, and she kisses him properly, putting everything into it that she hoped one day she’d find the words for. Nothing ever seemed to be enough, never seemed to capture just how much she did love him, three little words were all she had, but inadequate for how she felt. 

“I love you too,” she says, kissing him again before she pulls back, “Now, let's watch another movie.” 

He salutes her and grins when she rolls her eyes again, and then he reaches for the remote. “You take our lazy days very seriously.” 

“Well, we are about to have even less of them,” she says, getting as comfortable as she can while he flicks through the movie options on the screen, “I don’t think a newborn would make this any easier.” 

“Worth it though, right?” He asks, even though he already knows the answer, and she squeezes his hand and lifts it to kiss his knuckles. 

“Totally worth it.” 

[hedarose]

Shauna x Natalie

The Parts Of You I Love Can’t Be Erased

Warnings: graphic depiction of skinning/gutting animals, in depth talk on how to use a rifle, a character is in a medically induced coma after an accident that left them near dead

*Beep, beep, beep…* The steady stream of rhythmic beeping always kept Nat on the edge of losing her sanity. Realistically she knew that all the machines attached to Shauna were only helping her- not hurting her, but she had seen the other girl live in the wilderness without any of these things. She wished the nurses would just turn the volume off so she could have one second of silence in this hell hole. It didn’t make sense to see Shauna reduced down to a fraction of the person she used to be and suddenly look like a test subject in some sort of sick trial wrapped in casts and filled with tubes and have something pumping air into her body.

*Beep, beep, beep…* Nat zoned out again as she scraped the last of her pudding cup clean for probably the millionth time. The hospital food truly was ass here, but she was the only one that had to suffer through it and she was slightly resentful for that. Sometimes Nat wished she could be as out of it as Shauna was and have a tube of liquified calories be directly injected. But then she thinks of Ben and the thought is gone in a flash. A scrape of the plastic spoon resonates in her head as she pulls the item out of her mouth, she mushes the tapioca pearls and tastes the vanilla flavor coating her taste buds. A fleeting thought comes through as she swallows, Shauna hasn’t eaten anything this sweet- or she guesses- anything at all in three whole weeks. Nat shakes her head and stands to throw her cup away, maybe she’ll take a walk down the hallway to stretch her legs out a bit… or maybe she’ll just pull her chair up and rest her head on Shauna’s bed while she holds her hand to rest her eyes. Well no one is ever around to judge her so once her pudding cup is safely disposed of she plops herself back down in her arm chair and scoots it across the floor till it’s flush with Shauna’s hospital bed. Taking care to not jostle the arm that is wrapped in a bright green cast- courtesy of Nat- she scoops up a slightly swollen hand and puts it under her cheek and grabs Shauna’s stuffed bear and cuddles it into her chest.

*Beep, beep, beep…* The blanket Nat pulls up over her shoulders is not the scratchy one that the hospital gave her day one of Shauna’s stay. It’s a soft flannel quilt that Natalie had broken into Shauna’s apartment for and stolen when she went to go grab her stuffed bear- Jack. She ensures it’s covering her completely before she twists her head to give Shauna’s bruised and swollen hand a featherlight kiss. Just like usual there is no movement from the other girl. Natalie gives a little smile up at her and lays her head down on the white hospital sheets. Sleep takes her quickly after her eyes close fully. Sometimes the rhythmic beeping can be good, it’s a reminder that Shauna is still alive…

—

*POP*

“Hey! Who the fuck took the gun? Who was that?” Natalie shot out of her hut and demanded an answer, she soon realized that the camp was still in a state of morning silence and the only person standing awake outside of a hut was Van.

Van quickly dropped her arm full of wood and raised her arms up in the air, “I swear to god it wasn’t me. I’m on fire watch so I was up early to get kindling.”

Nat huffed and said, “Van I can see obviously it wasn’t you. I need to know who it was though. Can you help me find who is missing?”

Van nodded her head quickly, “yeah sure man, let me just restock the fire first.”

Nat started to poke her head into all the huts and look at all the girls that somehow slept through the gunshot that went off seemingly right outside of camp. Once Van and Nat stumbled upon the very last hut they saw an empty bed… Nat sighed, “it’s fucking Shauna.”

Natalie made quick work of dismissing Van and then she grabbed a jacket from her hut. Nat began to scour the woods that surrounded the camp. It didn’t take long at all to find her. Shauna was standing in a small clearing looking confused as all hell as she fumbled with the rifle. “Shauna, what are you doing?”

Shauna’s head snapped to Natalie and she furrowed her brows before she looked back down at the rifle. It looked as if a sense of shame had come over her. “I want to know how to do this- I need to know how to do this.”

“What? Why? What reason could you possibly have to be out here doing this?! Especially right now?”

“Why are you asking me so many questions?” Shauna demanded.

“Look- I’m sorry Shauna, I’m not trying to pry. But no one is even awake yet and you’re out here shooting off rounds. It’s a little weird, yeah?” Natalie said softly.

Shauna looked back up to Nat, “I don’t know how to load it and like do all the shit for it.”

Nat’s jaw dropped slightly, she was lost for words momentarily. “Oh. Okay. Do you-? Do you want me to teach you?” Shauna’s jaw tightened, the look in her eyes dark. The help would be useful. She nodded jerkily. Nat approached like she was approaching a feral animal, “okay… but first can I start with some other basics? Just to keep us both safe.” Her hand reached down to gently rest on the rifle over Shauna’s hand ready to take it from her grasp. The fight for power was there for the taking, Shauna clearly wanted to have some sort of upper hand, but she just didn’t. She had already admitted the rifle was empty and she didn’t know how to reload it, but she wanted to be the badass here. Shauna squared her shoulders and then let her hands drop the tight grip they held. The silent battle was over as fast as it started. Natalie released a small breath she didn’t know she had been holding in.

With the rifle firmly in her hands she looked down and saw it was still switched to fire, she rotated it to the side to show Shauna, “this button here, you can push it in and out, that’s the safety. Unless you mean to actively be firing it should always be on safe.” Once Nat switched it to safe she pulled the lever down halfway to verify that the chamber was indeed empty. She looked up at Shauna and gave her a small shrug, “yeah you emptied her earlier, she only had one round left inside I guess.” Good thing, Nat thought.

“Yeah I just kinda shot it at the tree… I missed.” Shauna mumbled.

“Uh yeah… as far as actual shooting goes I didn’t see how you shot earlier, but this has a good bit of kick as I’m sure you felt. So your stance has to be solid and you have to be really stable to absorb that so you don’t get knocked back. And it also helps your aim…” Natalie had added with a slight smirk, then planted her feet to show Shauna how she stood, “I put my left foot directly under my shoulder and I let my right foot fall slightly back a comfortable distance. But I leave my feet facing forward in case I need to move closer to my target- then I’d be ready to move, my dad taught me to stay on the balls of my feet so I can roll off easier… if that makes sense.” Shauna nodded silently as she absorbed the information and crossed her arms so Nat continued, “and since this is a bit heavy and we don’t eat a ton you really need to make sure you tuck the butt into your shoulder pocket hard, it helps to take the weight off of your biceps, it’ll fit right into the spot, I’ll show you in a minute. And then you lean your torso forward just ever so slightly so your body is squared up to whatever you’re aiming at. And lastly your legs- they can stay mostly straight up or you can bend your knees just a bit if it’s more comfortable. Like this.” Natalie lifted the rifle and went through all the motions, dry firing the weapon into a safe direction away from the camp. It was nothing more than a metallic click, but it was to show Shauna that the weapon wasn’t intimidating anymore than you made it out to be.

“You- you said your dad taught you all this?” Shauna asked with an air of caution and a head tilt.

Natalie swallowed and nodded, “yeah before he completely went off the rails and decided we were the worst family in existence. He kinda used to care about us a bit. He would take me hunting with him, but he taught me all this stuff before he died, yeah.” Natalie answered the question truthfully.

“Well at least it counts for something right?” Shauna asked with a plain face.

“Yeah, actually I am glad I know this stuff out here. So I am happy I have it locked in the memory bank.” Nat responded back. “Want me to show you now?”

Shauna uncrossed her arms and nodded while she stepped closer to Nat, “do you worst.”

Nat chuckled, “alright killer take this. Remember your safety button, never point at something you don’t intend to shoot, and never put your finger on the trigger until you are ready to fire. Now find how it’s comfortable to stand for you- yeah that’s a good starting point…” Shauna reached over and pushed Natalie. “Okay! Okay! It’s just good!” Nat laughed out as she walked back over to where Shauna stood with her feet still planted. “I’ll just say on the stance, if I were to push your shoulders back right now, would you fall? You are meant to brace for an impact basically… this stance is not that. So stand how I showed you and I’ll give you a little shove to kinda show you what I mean.” Shauna huffed at the other girl, but begrudgingly did as she was told and tried to copy Natalie’s feet. Once her feet were planted Natalie laid her hands on Shauna’s shoulders and pushed back, Shauna had been properly positioned this time and the impact was absorbed. Natalie smiled and removed her warm hands from her shoulders.

“Okay I see what you mean, my first stance wasn’t bad though,” Shauna grumbled.

“No, it was definitely good…” Natalie placated her with a small smile. “Okay, now for your shoulder pocket- lift the rifle and you’ll see it fits right here. Good, yeah right there. And if your target is moving this should be an extension of yourself, so the rifle moves with your head and your eyes. Not your head first, then the rifle. And I can see you’re doing it now, having the slight lean at the waist and bend in your knees, that’s good you’re a natural. All there is now is to shoot, so we can do what I did earlier. We can have you shoot now with no rounds, and just give you a feel of pulling the trigger and pulling the lever and stuff.”

Shauna nodded with the happiest expression she had probably worn in months on her face, “okay, let’s do it.”

—

*Beep, beep, beep…* Natalie felt a hand shaking her out of the slumber that had taken over. The hand on her shoulder retreated the moment her eyes began to open. “Oh good you’re awake, it’s time for Shauna’s rounds. If you could just scoot your chair back my dear.”

*Beep, beep, beep…* Gruffly Natalie responds, “oh shit, my bad yeah sorry.” She drops Shauna’s sweaty hand from her grasp and stands to push her chair away from the bed. Natalie stays standing to watch as the nurse roll a cart in. Ah, bath day. “Any word on when you guys are gonna stop the whole medical coma thing? Sorry, I’m not like super smart with this stuff.”

*Beep, beep, beep…* The older woman who Natalie really does prefer over some of the other nurses says, “we’ve already stopped the medicine that is inducing it. Her brain must need just a bit more time dear. It’s a good thing, giving her this rest. I know it feels scary, it feels like she’s so far away. But you can always talk to her, she’s listening. I know you don’t like bath time, the cafeteria just started up dinner.” Natalie knows she dumbs down Shauna’s prognosis for her, but she appreciates it all the same. “Thank you Barb, I’ll be back in a little bit. Take of care of her now.” Natalie says as she walks towards the door. The nurse smiles, “I always do dear.”

Natalie nearly jogs to the cafeteria for some overcooked chicken and mushy peas, but she can’t stand to see Shauna’s broken body after her pleasant dream of the girl still angry and unbroken. You’d think that all the rest she was getting would be doing nothing but healing her, but Shauna was in a medically induced coma being tube fed, so she was healing slowly and it felt like every single bone in her body was broken, not to mention the trauma to her brain. So her body was working overtime to keep up. The bruises were in the stage of healing that are ugly yellow and green and put Natalie in pain just to look at them. She’s not ever judging how Shauna looks, she just can’t stand to look at something so broken and think it’s the same person as her Shauna that she knew.

Well upgrades at least, it’s not dry chicken today. It was some form of shepherds pie and it was not dry at all. Natalie will take it, she eats slowly while watching the mindless news on the tv. Natalie was also in for a treat, they had strawberry milk today, she sips on it after she cleans her plate. Shauna is a milk freak, she would love some strawberry milk. But she can’t have it. Natalie decides maybe she will take that stroll now. Her mind wanders and she ends up outside underneath the overhang that leads to the parking garage, the parking garage that houses her car that is covered in dust now. She has left the hospital exactly two times, once to break into Shauna’s apartment for a set of clothes, a blanket and Jack. And once to attempt to get Shauna’s mother to come to the hospital. That was it. She’s been here since.

“Hey, Natalie is it?” An older gentleman asks.

Natalie clears her throat before she untucks her hands from her pockets to reach for a handshake, “yeah, I’m Nat. Do I know you, sir?”

“No no, I was just headed in to visit my wife. But I think I recognize you from the floor. You helped my daughter with the vending machine on Tuesday. Maxine, the short little one with no hair.” He motions to his head after he lets go of Nat’s hand.

The recognition sparks in Nat’s brain, Maxine is the little girl with cancer. And Maxine’s mother is the woman next door to Shauna who had a massive stroke… “Ahhhh Maxine, she’s a lovely little girl. She is very serious about her peanut m&ms. They got stuck, but I had a little trick up my sleeve to help her out.”

“She relayed the story, probably with a little flair added of course. Oh sorry, I’m Tony by the way. My wife is Olivia. Do you smoke? I was gonna have one before I went in, calm my nerves a bit.” Nat watches as he pulls out a pack and doesn’t think of a good enough reason to tell him no, it’s not like Shauna is here to yell at her.

“If you’re offering, I would love one.” He extends the pack and her hands shake as she pulls out a cigarette.

“If you don’t mind me asking- who are you here with? You’re in there every time I show up. That’s dedication.” The lighter is passed between the two.

“Shauna Shipman. She’s my…” Nat takes a drag off of her cigarette and pauses.

Tony fills the silence, “if she’s important to you that’s okay.”

Nat nods, “she is. She really is. She’s all that I have. I’m all that she has. So that’s that.”

“Understood, Nat and Shauna. It’s very nice to meet you both. My wife is in for a stroke, but if you’re up to meeting her she’s awake.” Tony says with a drag on his cigarette.

“Maybe tomorrow... Shauna was in a car wreck, it killed four of my friends. She just happened to be the lucky one.” Natalie says with a far off look. Maybe Shauna wasn’t so lucky.

They fall into silence after that and finish their cigarettes without any fanfare. Tony pipes up as they walk towards the entrance, “you seem like an okay kid, thanks for chatting. Let me know if you need anymore smokes. You know where my family is.”

“I- I actually don’t smoke anymore, Shauna made me quit. But if I cave, I’ll let ya know.” Nat says with a ghost of a smile.

They take the elevator together, then the hallway, only separating once they reach their destination. They push into their rooms with a nod to each other.

*Beep, beep, beep…* Shauna lays as still as ever, but now she’s cleaner. Thanks, Barb. Natalie approaches the foot of the bed and grabs the exposed part of Shauna’s foot that isn’t covered by the cast. “Looking good bud, Barb got ya all cleaned up for me. Isn’t she sweet?” Nat looks down at the foot in her hand, it’s slightly chilly and it’s definitely a bit swollen. It’s not that she would say Shauna’s feet are cute, but she loves everything about Shauna. So maybe she does think her feet are cute. So what? Pft. The urge overtakes her when she is looking and she bends down to brush a kiss over the top of Shauna’s foot. “I hate that your skin is all covered, I want it back.” Nat takes Shauna’s other foot and lays a soft kiss on the exposed skin. She doesn’t know what she expected, but Shauna always had ticklish feet, maybe a twitch or something. Nothing of the sort comes. It’s okay, it will come.

*Beep, beep, beep…* She walks over to the bathroom to wash the smoke from her hands and brush it from her mouth. She knows Shauna isn’t conscious, but even so she won’t give her a forehead kiss smelling like a cigarette. As Nat exits the bathroom she is startled into halting short because of a person sitting by the bed, “Debra?”

*Beep, beep, beep…* Shauna’s mother turns her head to lock eyes with Nat. “Hello, Nat. It’s good to see you again.” The woman who looked as if she had aged ten years since Natalie had last seen her greets warmly.

*Beep, beep, beep…* “Uh it’s good to see you too? I’m sorry, I’m a little confused. I begged you to come like three weeks ago, but you said you and Shauna didn’t talk anymore. Why are you here now?” Natalie asks as she sets her toothbrush down on her bag and walks over to stand in front of her usual chair.

*Beep, beep, beep…* Debra smiles sadly, “her and I don’t talk anymore. I figured I was respecting a wish of hers by not coming here. I didn’t know how bad it was, one of the nurses I know called me and explained what was going on-”

*Beep, beep, beep…* “No! No, I’m sorry that is- that’s bullshit, I was sobbing to you on the ground in the rain outside your house about how Shauna was dying in the hospital- I had just lost everyone else in my life and Shauna was in the same fucking car as them. What do you mean you didn’t know how bad it was? Respecting her wishes? What wish could she even be making right now? Look at the state of her! I don’t even know why you two don’t talk, she never told me, she doesn’t let me in all the way because she is so fucked mentally, but I don’t care. She is so closed off to certain parts of her life. I don’t have a key to her apartment, I had to break in to steal the shit that’s in here right now. I care so much about your daughter, I am here every second of every day, I barely leave her side, and I try to understand what the medical team tells me. You don’t get to walk in here now that someone else called you and you need to save face. So maybe… respect my wishes and get the fuck out of here.”

*Beep, beep, beep…* Debra, startled by Nat’s anger stands. “Honey, Shauna and I have stuff that we just couldn’t get past. It’s not for me to tell you.”

*Beep, beep, beep…* “You’re her fucking mother. Whatever it is, I don’t care. Get out.” Deb hangs her head and turns for the exit, the woman hightails it out of the room without another word. Nat sighs and finally falls back into her chair, she turns to look at Shauna. “When you wake up I have so many questions dude. Goddamn that shit wore me out.” Nat pulled her chair back up to Shauna’s bedside and leaned over to give her a forehead kiss being careful to avoid the oxygen tube in the girls mouth. Once again she snuggled back up and grabbed Shauna’s hand, flannel blanket and Jack securing them safely.

—

“Nat?” Shauna asked as she leaned her head into the girls hut.

“What’s up?” Natalie responded coolly.

“I had a question- or a proposition. It’s stupid actually.” Shauna had cut herself short and started to leave.

Natalie shot up and grabbed Shauna’s arm, “hey, just ask me I won’t tell anyone.”

Shauna nodded and swallowed before she said, “since you taught me how to shoot and we’ve been practicing… I was wondering if you wanted to learn how to skin the animals with me. Gen just got back with a few from the traps.” Shauna looked awfully uncomfortable and rubbed her eyebrow as she waited for an answer.

“Oh- well it can’t hurt to have somebody else versed on the skill could it? Sure, I’ll come over there in a minute, let me finish up what I was doing.” Natalie smiled.

“Okay, cool cool cool. I’ll be over there then!” Shauna stalked off quickly. It was cute.

Natalie tried to not keep her waiting and showed up within five minutes. Shauna had three bunnies laid out and a knife with a few rags and some water nearby. “Nice set up you got in here.”

“Oh thanks, it’s not a good as my shed. Well actually some of things I like better, some of the things I miss. Can go either way. Okay, are you squeamish?” Shauna asked with a blank face.

“I guess it depends, I’ve never done this so honestly I don’t know what to make of it.” Nat answered honestly with a shrug.

“Okay if it’s too much you can tell me, I’ll just get right into it then. With these guys I grab one, remove the head like this, then you find the joints on their legs. Remove all four, sometimes back legs are trickier cause they’re thicker, so you have to put a little more effort into it, but they’ll pop like this and now feet are off. So head and feet I put them over here and burn those later we don’t do anything with them… rabbits are easier because you can literally peel the fur off, but if that is too hard for when it’s cold you can gently slice the fur down the center of the stomach. I recommend pulling the fur off though so it’s intact. So you’ll grab the legs and peel it back firmly. It comes off really nice actually this is how I’m able to save these for Lottie and Akilah to reuse for their projects.”

Nat interrupted quickly, “you didn’t know any of this before we got stranded right?”

Shauna looked confused, “no I didn’t. Just trial and error, why?”

“You’re really good at it. You just skinned a rabbit in like 45 seconds. Well maybe that was an exaggeration, but it felt like it.” Natalie said slightly impressed, slightly grossed out. But no judgement on Shauna’s part.

“Oh yeah like I said, trial and error. Most animals are different. So they all need to be treated as such. And… we are um… yeah we’re I don’t know. That’s a whole different playing field.” Shauna mumbled.

“I see…” Nat mumbled.

“Anyways, now that we have a naked rabbit- well after we remove his tail cause it’s all fluffy and shit throw that with the head and feet- now that we have a naked rabbit we can cut open his stomach- it doesn’t take that much pressure- and we can remove his organs and guts. They come out pretty much on their own. Pull out the heart and the liver and stuff, we can eat that, but the guts… that’s trash. Now I’ll move the nasty stuff off the table, and take some of this water and rinse the carcass so it’s somewhat cleaned and then it’s good for me to cut it up for Mari to cook. The bones can be boiled down for soup and stuff as well. You wanna try skinning the next one?” Shauna asked Natalie with an excited look on her face.

Natalie shrugged, “fuck it, let’s give it a go. Why not. Don’t laugh.”

Shauna gave a small smirk, “no one was around to laugh at me, I won’t laugh at you.”

Nat understood the words for what they were, but to keep things light replied, “appreciate it Shauna.” The first cuts through the small animal were slightly sickening to Nat, but she pushed through and slowly she had the head and the feet removed. Then the skin off. Then the tail off. The cut through the stomach was easier than she had anticipated, but Shauna didn’t lie. The guts felt like the fell out into her hands, and they were wet- the blood dried sticky and flaky. Nat was not a fan of that necessarily. She ignored her personal feelings on the matter, Shauna didn’t have a choice in this. She rinsed the carcass and Shauna showed her how to slice the animal into manageable dinner sized pieces. The process was rewarding once it was complete, but still- it was not something she wanted to do everyday.

“Here, you can take the tray to Mari. You did really good Nat.” The praise from Shauna heated Nat’s cheeks and she looked down at the cuts of meat that she had helped make.

“Thanks Shauna, I’ll see you out there.” Natalie replied.

—

*Beep, beep, beep…* A squeeze on Nat’s hand startled her awake. Her eyes shot to the appendage. She looked up and saw Shauna’s hand was gripping hers the best it could, then she looked up and saw two dark brown eyes locked on hers, “Shauna?! Oh my god! Stay still, don’t panic, I’ll get a nurse or a doctor or somebody!” She stood and reached for the call button, then ran into the hallway trying to find a night shift worker that was not actively doing rounds. “Hello?! Somebody?! Um my- my- my- I think my- my Shauna just woke up! Oh… I think I’m gonna pass out.” As soon as Natalie saw a doctor rounding the corner towards her she saw black. Her body hit the floor shortly thereafter.

*Beep, beep, beep…* Natalie came to slowly and was met with the gentle soothing sounds of Shauna’s monitors… when had she suddenly decided they were soothing? Oh! Shauna had woken up, Nat sits up and looks over to see Shauna watching her. “Shauna, oh fuck.” The battered girl gives Nat a small blink of her eyes. Just then a nurse walks in, she gives Nat a big smile. “Oh boy, looks like somebody else is awake too! Glad to see you’ve joined us again.” Nat blushes at the attention, “oh yeah I just got really overwhelmed earlier, that was my bad.” The nurse chuckles while she hovers around Shauna checking and moving things. “Okay, fair warning people are gonna be in and out of here all night. But feel free to talk to her and pull your chair up when we’re gone.” Nat nods as the nurse exits the room.

*Beep, beep, beep…* Nat scoots her chair up to Shauna’s bed and leans forward to give her a kiss on the nose. “I missed seeing these eyes. You have no idea how crazy I’ve felt in here waiting for you my love.” Nat grabs Shauna’s hand and swallows before saying, “the girls are all gone… it’s truly just us now. Your mom stopped by today- I kicked her out. I smoked a cig with your next door neighbors husband. I’m gonna need a key to your apartment. I broke in to steal Jack for you.” She lifts him up as she says it. Shauna lifts her lips as much as she can at the words. Tears well in her eyes.

*Beep, beep, beep…* Nat’s face drops in confusion, Shauna’s lips look like they’re trying to move. She leans forward to see better, she can hear the faintest sound coming from Shauna. “Kiss me.” Natalie leans back and brushes a hand over Shauna’s hair while looking down at her adoringly. “I’ll kiss you only because I love you, you look fucking terrifying. Come here killer.” Natalie leans down and connects their lips gently while rubbing her thumb over Shauna’s cheek.

——————————————————

Notes: sorry Debra stans, she was a bitch in this… I am not a Melissa survivor fan, so this is just RIP Lottie, Van, Tai and Misty. You furthered my plot 🫡 This was brought to you by a beeping noise that has been going on the past few days at my work and I can’t find where it is coming from. Let me know if y’all like it 🙂‍↕️

[sushi-atsushilover]

Yea so I think this REALLY annoyed some people

Lol ATLEAST give me some logic, but obviously you won't will you? I mean since when did delulu people have a single briancells in their heads? They literally admit they're delusional and joke around about it to make themselves feel better. Just LOOK at this scene yeah?

Wtf. Like literally wtf.

Anne looks horrified cuz well duh there's a snake on her. And for some reason it simply HAD to slither into there out of all the places? And in the most suggestive way of all time? Like it could've curled around her neck or just stayed there until Sebastian removed it? What was the need behind this?

What's more is that doesn't this scene feel WRONG to some people? This is literally the cliche anime fanservice scene where a girl's scared and horrified in a very sexual position, then she says the classic "YAmEtE kUdAsAI!!" but of course it doesn't stop and the girl is publicly humiliated. There are multiple people present yet no one does anything until the fanservice has fully fanserviced, and it contributes nothing to the plot. Oscar said she smelled like a werewolf, this does actually move the plot forward, but couldn’t it have been done in any other way!?

What's more is that the girl was literally SA'd and it's considered comedic. But I guess what else would you expect from a fujoshi who writes yaoi? This scene isn't SA? It very much would've been if it was an actual person in Oscar's place, but please don't act like none of you know this is to satisfy fantasies of sick people. The animal doing it is the ONLY thing that stops it from being SA, what's more is that the animal is MORE than self aware. Don't act like you don't know Yana didn't just make an animal do it to get less criticism.

The girl is touched sexually without her consent by something she's PETRIFIED of, she CAN'T fight back as she fears that it could result in DEATH. And then some creepy ass demon comes over to nonchalantly pull it out, tryna act cool, and then starts smirking like the mf he is. Like WHAT are you smiling about? F*** off fr. The world would be a better place without you.

And if this really doesn't matter then lets look at the main issue shall we? The disgusting issue that continues to exist even now, a problem STILL not fixed. And also the biggest reason why I hate Yana with all my heart.

What. The. F*** is her issue with constantly fetishizing and sexualizing Ciel, a 12-13 year old boy? She's constantly making him wear strange clothing against his consent, and he and Sebastian, even if they're not in a BL, often interact in very inappropriate scenes. Let's not act like she doesn't know most of her fans are obsessed over Sebastian, and she literally writes him in that way. Doesn't this count as fanservice? She makes him have sexual scenes, and writes and shows him in a way that appeals to both Fujoshis and crazy fangirls. Like Sebastian's mere existence is fanservice, and him and Ciel are literally yaoi bait. They're obviously NOT canon, if Yana made them canon her whole career would end, so she lets out her sick fetish fantasies and writes to appeal to showerless fans by writing them subtly sexual/fetishized scenes. You can't even deny it. It's all there. The end.

Unpopular opinion: Black Butler is one if the worst animes I've ever seen. Like yk in the Emerald Witch arc?

The VERY moment I laid eyes on this character I already knew she was gonna be used for the most unnecessary fan service scene and Sebastian will be involved.

The amount of fanservice and yaoi bait in Black Butler is simply detestable. I USED to like it a lot, until I saw Ciel being forced to wear clothes he didn’t like, him getting unnecessarily groped by Sieglinde and many other shit. Like wth. Tf is wrong with Yana Toboso?

[the-valiant-valkyrie]

Theatre obssesed mentally ill person with sharp object going through the horrors but putting a theatre lens on it in order to cope with the horrors ?

theater obsessed mentally ill person with sharp object going through the horrors but putting a theater lens on it in order to cope with the horrors, forced to endure endless cycles that even death can not remove them from, who have a past that they can not- under ANY circumstances- return to, but who have a distant repressed part of themself who longs to return to it anyways, who have become so detached from their own bodies that the thought of being maimed and dying- whether from someone else's actions or their own- is meaningless to them at worst and addictive at best, who puts on a facade because if they drop the act their friends will hate them and never want to be around them anymore, who only has one person who knows the True Them and has to bottle it up from everyone else, who deems themself inherently unlovable unless they say the exact right things, do the exact right actions, perform the exact right way, who love their friends so much it makes them sick to their fucking stomach but who can NOT break their illusion of confidence and control to allow themself to be loved the way they desperately need to. also sometimes they eat a fruit and get sick

[yjdrabbles123]

Pt 2

‘Hey, it’s ok-’ Van’s hand cups her wet cheek at the same time as she tries to hand Tai her cone to hold- clumsily, letting go too soon, and Tai fumbles it and Van’s cone splats to the ground too and that’s it, the thing that makes Mel burst into proper sobbing because she’s ruining everything-

‘C’mon sweetie-’ Tai wraps an arm around her shoulders, firmly leading her away from the icecream van: thank god at least that they’d decided to get icecream from the van in the parking lot. ‘It’s all alright, it’s fine-’

Except it’s not fine, she’s not fine-

At the car, Tai grabs Van’s flannel from the backseat. She has it covering the front seat and she’s gently sitting Mel down on it sideways before Mel can even think or protest. The embarrassment of it sears her, speeding up her breathing and her tears.

‘Let’s try to calm down, ok honey?’

She tries but she can’t, she’s going to ruin Van’s shirt if she stays sitting on it and then Van will be annoyed at her and-

‘Mel. Kid.’ Van crouches in front of her on the asphalt and takes one of Mel’s hands in each of hers- then relinquishes one so that Mel can jam her thumb into her mouth. It’s babyish but she can’t stop crying and she needs to ground herself somehow, she needs the familiar comfort- ‘Sit still ok?’

She makes herself stop trying to get up.

‘Good girl. Now. Do I look mad?’

She shakes her head tearily. 

‘Does Tai look mad?’

Another shakes.

Even through the whirl of fear and anxiety and upset, she has to admit- they don’t. Tai is biting her lip, her face soft and creased with sympathy, one hand on Mel’s shoulder, her thumb rubbing little circles. 

‘And are we acting like we’re mad at you?’

‘Nu-uh.’

‘No we’re not. Because this is nothing to be mad about, remember?’

This nod is a little harder. Van moves a little so that Tai can pass Mel some tissues. She presses them to her swollen eyes, sniffling, feeling stupid, feeling so small. Wishing, not for the first time, that she was little enough for Van to pick her up fully to cuddle her, even if she’d ruin Van’s outfit too.

Maybe Van picks up on it- somehow, the way she can somehow read Mel’s mind sometimes- because she leans into the car to wrap Mel up in a huge hug, in a position that probably isnt super comfy, one hand cupping the back of Mel’s head and one gently rubbing her back.

‘S-sorry-’

‘Shhhh no apologies buddy, we’re good.’

She and Tai are being so nice but Mel knows that they’re surely disappointed in her, they must regret inviting her out and-

‘Listen.’ Now Tai is leaning in close, her breath tickling Mel’s ear. ‘We absolutely can go home now if you’d like to- that would be fine, absolutely fine- but…’ She pauses. ‘If you want to just change clothes in the bathroom, we could stay out a bit longer. What do you say? We could go get some better icecream since you lost yours. The place that does the cherry kind you like is still open….’

Mel can feel Van tense up with eagerness before forcing herself to relax again and feign nonchalance: ‘Only if you’re feeling like it, ok kid?’

‘Really?’

Tai nods. ‘Of course! It’s not your fault you guys missed out- and my cone is basically soup now anyway-’

She’s smiling like she means it, like she really does want to keep hanging out with her, even though she had an accident, even though she cried like a baby about it.

She thinks They like me, they still like me- and the thought sends warmth through her that is enough to chase away some of the cold scared anxious sick feeling that an accident inevitably brings on.

‘O-ok’

‘Yay!’ Van squeezes her again in jubilation, then pulls back and offers a hand. ‘You wanna come with me to get cleaned up first?’

She nods and lets Van pull her up and sling an arm over her shoulders.

It’s ok, she’s ok.

Maybe a fic idea?Little Melissa and CG taivan going to the park. And little Mel wanting to impress two of her favorite people by going on the slides and swinging the highest. But she’s so excited and hyper she doesn’t realize she hasn’t went potty at all. And while getting ice cream a accident happens and little Mel feels so bad for “ruining” their outing. But tai and Van just reassure her (I love your stuff!)

Pt 1: Blame

Really, Tai blamed herself. She hadn’t reminded Mel to use the bathroom before they left for the park- she’d meant to but as she opened her mouth to do so, Mari had run into the kitchen with a nosebleed that seemed like it was trying to rival Thermopylae and her gentle reminder had been forgone for frantically asking Mel to grab her some paper towels.

(Mari’s rainbow shirt would never be the same again. Neither would two tiles of the kitchen floor.)

She HAD reminded to fill Mel’s green waterbottle before they left- it was, putting it lightly, not a cool day- and she HAD reminded both her and Van to keep drinking (no one wanted a repeat of last week when Van had crumpled to the floor half way through an argument about whether or not a pokemon could beat a digimon in a fight- at the time, Shauna had actually thought she was just being dramatic) and of course Mel had listened to her, because Mel was, on the whole, almost painfully obedient.

(Which was fine when it came to things like chores and bedtime and teeth-brushing and slightly less than fine when it came to things like Mel agreeing to lie on the ground so that Shauna could prove to Mari that she absolutely definitely could jump her bike off their home-made ramp.)

In any case, when Mel suddenly froze two seconds after being handed her icecream cone and frantically clutched at her pants- icecream cone dropping to the kerb in the process- and whimpered, Tai had felt nothing but guilt.

She could have stopped this- by being more responsible, by being more diligent- and she HADN’T.

It was her fault.

*

Van definitely blamed herself.

She was right to, too: it wasn’t as if she didn’t already KNOW that Mel listened to her more than she listened to any of the others. To Mel, what Van said was Gospel and she KNEW that if she’d told Mel it was ok to stop their tetris marathon to take a break before they went to the park, Mel would have listened to her. But she’d SO wanted to see if she could beat her high score and so….she hadn’t said anything, reasoning that if Mel needed to go, she’d have said something.

Except she knew and Tai knew and Mel knew and everyone knew that this wasn’t always true. She hadn’t ignored the fact exactly, but she hadn’t tried especially hard to remember it.

And if she’d been less selfish, not let herself get so invested in their ‘who can swing higher’ competition and actually paid attention, maybe she’d have been able to pick up on Mel’s slight wriggliness.

(She hadn’t even won the competition either- Tai had left both her and Mel in the dust. So it wasn’t even like it was worth it.)

Except by the time Mel’s slightly wriggliness became out-and-out squirming, they’d already been in line for icecream and she was already in the middle of digging coins out of her pockets (while also enjoying her usual struggle with keeping track of how much everything cost and what the coins in her hand added up to and how many other coins would be needed to cover the rest- if she pulls out a fifty cent piece she’ll need this much but if the coin turned out to be a nickel she’d need THIS much) and she figured they could wait a moment for the icecream guy to hand over their cones and to pay for them and THEN she’d insist they need to find a bathroom right away and she could just say that she needed to go so as to not embarrass Mel-

Except by THEN, Mel’s pants were already wet and Mel’s face was crumpling into tears and her icecream was melting onto the ground and the icecream guy was loudly pointing out that she’d underpaid and that he needed another quarter.

So she’d failed on every count.

It was her fault.

**

Mel blamed herself. Because of course it was no ones fault but her own.

She’d been SO excited when Tai had mentioned that she and Van were planning on going to the park and since her class was cancelled now, did she want to come?

It would have been so easy for Tai to have just said nothing and been able to enjoy alone time with just Van, since when they’d originally made the offer to everyone, no one else had been free.

But she’d noticed that Mel was still at home, she’d actually gone out of her way to let Mel know the invitation was still open even though she absolutely didn’t have to, and she hadn’t even ASKED Van first!

And yet when Van had found out that Mel was coming too, she’d actually beamed like it was the best news ever that the trip was going to be three of them rather than two.

Mel isn’t like painfully insecure of anything: she does know that the others like her a lot, maybe even love her, and that they like hanging out with her and don’t just let her hang around to be polite.

But still.

These reminders mean so much to her.

Except now she’s ruined it- just because she hadn’t even remembered to go to the bathroom before leaving the house although they all almost always get reminded to go before they go anywhere.

(Van has told her lots of times that it’s not just for her- that she herself is, in her own words, ‘super bad at knowing like….anything about my own body dude, you know that-’, that it’s not as if the others don’t need to be reminded too. The difference, Mel thinks but doesn’t say, is that while Jackie and Mari might end up squirming and demanding they stop five minutes after leaving the house if they aren’t reminded to go, Mel is usually the only one who will come home in different pants to the ones she left the house in.)

She hadn’t even realised she’d needed to go so badly until suddenly she DID and then it was almost too late to say anything- because they were in a queue and Van was literally mid conversation with the icecream man and how could she interrupt right then?

And then it was absolutely too late to say anything.

And she’d dropped her icecream- wasting Van’s money, wasting Van’s effort in making the payment when counting loose change could sometimes be a struggle and moreso when she felt under pressure, wasting the whole day because she’d turned what could have just been a nice day out into the boring routine of having to go clean up.

She was sure they both regretted inviting her out now.

[kthologue]

the bet — jason todd

synopsis. it’s harder to keep your relationship with jason a secret from the world's greatest detectives than you thought. (3 times each wayne family member tries to prove that you and jason are together and 1 time they actually do.)

notes. ooc. tooth. rotting. fluff. like 3k words of it and im sick. my first time writing for jason ever yay!

“You know, if you stare any harder, you might actually burn a hole through her head.”

Dick’s teasing voice slices through the comfortable silence between the two brothers, save for the distant sirens and the low hum of Gotham’s never-ending nightlife below them. They’re perched on a rooftop across from an upscale bar, the neon sign casting a soft glow on their suits. Through the massive glass windows, you sit at the bar, leaning in with an easy, disarming laugh as the suspect, some sleazy drug trafficker falls right into your trap.

Jason, crouched beside Dick with his elbows on his knees, grumbles beneath his mask. “I’m not staring.”

Dick lets out a quiet chuckle, shaking his head. “Right. Then I must be hallucinating.”

“I thought we got you checked out for that already,” Jason shoots back, his voice sharp.

Dick winces, placing a dramatic hand over his heart. “Low blow.”

“It was pretty funny.”

Dick doesn’t argue, just settles into a knowing silence, watching as Jason’s hand unconsciously flexes against the holster at his hip.

Jason exhales through his nose, his jaw ticking. “I don’t understand why she has to flirt to get intel. We could just beat the answers out of these guys. Hell, we’d probably get it faster.”

The older vigilante shakes his head. “Yeah, because nothing says ‘covert op’ like bashing heads through walls.” His voice is light, but his eyes flicker to the way Jason’s fingers tighten around the grip of his gun. “Relax. Your sweetheart can handle herself.”

Jason freezes, but only for a fraction of a second. His heart, though, does that annoying thing where it skips a beat, both traitorous and stupid.

Your sweetheart.

Not that anyone knew. Not that anyone could know. As much as he wanted to grab you by the waist and kiss you breathless after missions, he wasn’t about to hand his family more ammunition for their relentless teasing.

Dick, for one, was proving exactly why this relationship stayed a secret.

The silence should have been Jason’s first warning. The way Dick just sits there, absently swinging a batarang between his fingers, watching the bar with an all-too-pleased expression.

“You know,” Dick hums, as if lost in thought, “it’s important to let that special someone know how you feel. Your twin flame. That one person you’ve been pining over since– oh, I don’t know, your youth.”

Jason doesn’t move.

Dick pauses for dramatic effect, then casually props his chin in his hand, his gaze flicking to Jason. A slow grin tugs at his lips.

“Hm. You’re blushing.”

Jason’s breath stills. His eyes snap to Dick, but his head remains stubbornly forward.

“I am not blushing.” His voice is gritted steel. “And I haven’t been pining over her for that long.”

Dick tilts his head, amusement flickering in his eyes. “Huh. Funny.” He leans back with an exaggerated stretch. “I never said who.”

Jason’s fists clench.

Damn it.

His mask covered his whole damn face. There was no way Dick could have seen a blush, no way he could have known.

Jason grits his teeth as realization dawns.

He walked right into that.

Like a lovesick fool.

The next time Jason’s nearly caught is at one of Bruce’s galas.

Jason had grumbled and rolled his eyes when you insisted on attending—something about not wanting to spend the night in a “stuffy ass ballroom pretending to care about Gotham’s elite.” You had countered that it was for a good cause, something you actually cared about, and that Bruce would appreciate the support. Begrudgingly, he agreed.

But, of course, he couldn’t just let you go without making things complicated.

“Matching colors,” Tim observes, arms crossed, his sharp blue gaze flickering between you and Jason.

You school your expression into something neutral. Jason, standing entirely too close to you, does no such thing.

“What a coincidence,” Tim drawls, a smirk tugging at his lips.

“It really was,” you force out a laugh, silently screaming at Jason for his careless mistake.

He had seen your dress before the gala, made a gruff noise of disapproval, and then—without a single word—had left only to return an hour later with a tie in the exact same deep shade of red.

You had almost thrown a shoe at him.

As endearing as the gesture should have been, it was infuriating. He was the one insisting that your relationship remain under wraps, but he was awful at hiding it.

Right now, you can practically feel his warmth radiating onto you, his fingers twitching at his side, itching to settle on your waist. His entire presence screams possessive, yet he’s standing there trying to play it cool.

“Right, Jay?” you prompt, hoping begging he plays along.

“Total accident,” he deadpans.

You mentally facepalm. He is not selling it.

Tim’s smirk deepens, thriving off Jason’s obvious discomfort.

“Well then,” Tim shrugs, barely suppressing his amusement. “If she’s not your date, do you mind if I steal a dance?”

Jason’s shoulders tense. His jaw clenches so tight you’re surprised his teeth don’t crack.

“Go ahead.”

His tone is flat, but you know better. His hands may be in his pockets, but you can see them clenched into fists. His entire body is rigid, like he’s forcing himself to not grab your wrist and pull you back to his side.

You want to laugh. It’s so obvious.

Tim takes your hand and whisks you away onto the dance floor before Jason can change his mind.

He’s is a smooth dancer, you’ll give him that. He moves with confidence, leading you effortlessly through the slow, sweeping steps of the waltz. The ballroom around you is a blur of glittering gowns and dark suits, the music swelling in a soft, romantic rhythm.

You try to focus on the dance, but you can feel Jason’s stare.

It’s burning into you from across the room, a weight against your spine that makes your pulse spike.

Tim notices. Of course, he does.

“I know I have a grand total of one song before your guard dog comes back,” he murmurs, tilting his head slightly as he spins you. His fingers press lightly against your back, his mouth close to your ear. “So, between you and me… you can just tell me if you’re dating.”

You groan. “Why is everyone so obsessed with this?”

Tim pulls back just enough to give you a pointed look. “Because the two of you have been dancing around each other for years. I’m in pain just watching.”

“You’re so dramatic.” You roll your eyes, trying not to laugh. “Buzz off and focus on your own romantic life, Drake.”

Tim just grins. “Yours is so much more interesting.” He spins you gracefully, his smirk growing as he catches sight of Jason still watching. Still fuming.

He tugs you back in, dropping his voice to a whisper. “So tell me… are the two of you together? Because I’ve been sensing–”

“You’ve been sensing jack shit, Drake.”

The voice is low, sharp, and pissed.

You barely have time to process Jason’s arrival before you feel a hand—his hand—on your waist, warm and grounding and claiming.

Tim barely gets a breath out before Jason smoothly steps in, seamlessly taking his place as if he had planned this from the start. His movements are precise, natural, possessive. The transition is so smooth it’s like the dance was meant to end like this—with you in his arms.

Tim watches, looking utterly delighted.

“Wow,” he muses. “Not even a full song? Possessive much?”

Jason doesn’t acknowledge him. His grip on you tightens, and you feel his breath against your temple as he leans in just enough to send a shiver down your spine.

You should step back. You should do something to break the illusion.

But you don’t.

Because his hand is on your waist, his other hand holding yours just right. His body is solid and warm against you, moving with you effortlessly like he was made for this. The scent of leather lingers on him, comforting and intoxicating.

He is looking at you like you are the only person in the room.

And you don’t even realize you’ve stopped breathing until he speaks.

“I don’t like how low his hands were.”

The words are gritted out, low and quiet, meant just for you.

Your heart stumbles. You should not find that as attractive as you do.

“Jason–”

He exhales sharply through his nose. “He knows. He’s just trying to het under my skin.”

You blink up at him, heat rising to your cheeks. “Jay, it was just a dance.”

His fingers flex against your waist.

Your breath catches in your throat. The words send something electric through you, something dangerous. You don’t have time to respond.

Because Tim, damn Tim, is still standing there, watching the whole exchange with way too much satisfaction.

“Well,” he muses, rocking back on his heels. “That was interesting.”

Jason finally acknowledges him by glowering in his direction.

“Get lost, Drake.”

Tim grins. Because while he may not have gotten a confession, he definitely got confirmation.

After your encounter with Tim, you and Jason had agreed to lay extra low. No unnecessary risks, no slip-ups. No feeding into their suspicions. That plan, of course, went up in flames, quite literally when you almost lost a damn arm.

Jason had nearly lost his mind.

Now, standing in the training room with Cassandra, you tug absentmindedly at the hem of your sleeve, trying to ignore the throbbing pain in your arm.

Cass, however, does not.

“That’s one nasty burn,” she winces, crouching slightly to get a better look at the angry, blistering wound.

You shift uncomfortably under her scrutiny. “It’s nothing, really,” you say, waving a dismissive hand. “I was just reaching into the oven to grab some muffins, and my arm accidentally hit the hot rack.”

Jason, standing beside you with his arms crossed, snorts.

“Yeah,” he mutters. “Told you to be careful this morning.”

The second the words leave his mouth, his body goes rigid. His eyes widen slightly, realizing his mistake.

Shit.

Cass doesn’t even blink before zeroing in.

“What was that?”

Jason schools his expression into mock confusion. “What was what?”

“Don’t play coy, Todd.” Cass’s voice is sharp, her dark eyes locked onto him with an intensity that could crack glass.

Jason ever so stubborn and entirely unwilling to admit defeat, doesn’t back down.

“I don’t know what you mean.” He doesn’t flinch.

Cass tilts her head, unconvinced. “I heard the two of you were on patrol pretty late last night.” Her gaze flickers between you and Jason, noting every shift in body language, every subtle tell. “So tell me, Todd… what were you doing with [Name] this morning too? Did you, perhaps, sleep together?”

Silence.

The tension in the room thickens, settling over you like an impending storm. Your pulse spikes. Jason’s jaw locks. Cass’s eyes remain unmoving, sharp as a blade.

The stalemate stretches too long.

Before Cass can press further, you jump in.

“What Jason meant,” you say quickly, forcing an easy laugh, “is that our patrol ended at around six in the morning. I invited him over for a snack, is all.”

You will her to believe it.

Jason exhales subtly beside you, relaxing ever so slightly at your quick save.

Cass, however, is not satisfied.

“You never invite me over for snacks,” she states, arms crossing over her chest.

You frown. “I’m sorry, Cass. How about next time?”

She considers for a moment, expression unreadable, before nodding.

“I’ll be there at sunrise.”

You smile, nudging her shoulder. “It’s a deal.”

Cass eyes the two of you for another long second before finally, finally, grabbing her bag and exiting the room.

The moment the door clicks shut, Jason lets out a heavy breath.

Without warning, his large frame topples over yours, his solid weight pressing against your back as he buries his face into the crook of your neck.

“You’re gonna kill me one day,” he mutters, lips brushing the sensitive skin near your ear. His voice is low, gravelly, full of something raw and unguarded.

His arms encircle you, pulling you flush against him.

You bite back a smile, leaning into his warmth.

“Have I told you how much I love you?” His lips graze the nape of your neck, lingering.

“Not nearly enough,” you murmur.

It’s a lie.

Because Jason tells you every single day.

If not with his words, then with the way he looks at you. With the way he touches you like you’re the most precious thing in the world. With the way he freaks out over every little injury, over every near miss, like the thought of losing you would be enough to unmake him.

And God, if he wasn’t so damn obvious about it.

Your charade finally comes to an end on a rare night. The entire family gathered around the Wayne Manor dining table. It had taken weeks of convincing, countless rescheduled plans, and Alfred’s unshakable will to make it happen. You silently applaud him, watching as he moves seamlessly around the table, topping off glasses and making sure everyone eats.

The conversation is lively but controlled, an unspoken agreement hanging in the air: no fights. Bruce was actually eating rather than brooding, Damian had only thrown out two insults so far, and Tim was at least half-awake. For a Wayne family dinner, this was practically peaceful.

No one notices that you and Jason are sitting a little too close, they’re all too engrossed with the hearty meal and a rare opportunity of having a civil conversation with each other.

Jason, ever the attentive boyfriend, wordlessly reaches for the serving platter and places another thick slice of roast onto your plate. Then, he carefully spoons asparagus onto your dish, making sure it’s coated just enough with hollandaise sauce just the way you like it.

“Eat up, sweetheart.” His voice is low and smooth, meant just for you.

Your heart does a little flutter at the name, and your lips tug into a smile as you pick up your fork.

But then a familiar voice turns the entire night around.

“Forgive me if I’m wrong,” Damian’s voice cuts through the table, as sharp as one of his throwing knives, “but doesn’t ‘sweetheart’ have romantic implications?”

Silence.

A few forks hover mid-air. Bruce pauses as he cuts into his steak. Dick, who had been talking to Cass, freezes mid-sentence. Tim, who had been half-heartedly scrolling through his phone under the table, suddenly looks very awake.

“No, you’re absolutely right,” Dick leans back in his chair, grinning like he just hit the jackpot. His eyes flicker with amusement as he clasps his hands together. 

Jason’s chewing slows. Your eyes flicker to his face, trying to gauge his reaction. This was it. The moment he always dreaded.

“Todd just called [Last Name] ‘sweetheart,’” Damian supplies, ever helpful, pointing at the two of you with his fork.

Cass and Tim share a knowing glance, both nodding in quiet confirmation.

Dick gapes. “In front of my salad?”

Jason, rather than looking panicked, looks entirely unbothered. Too unbothered. His jaw moves as he stuffs another carrot into his mouth, chews deliberately, and then–

“It’s our one-year anniversary next month.”

Chaos erupts.

“WHAT?”

“I KNEW IT!”

“Called it.”

“Took you guys long enough!”

Tim smacks the table, rattling the silverware. Dick throws his hands in the air. Cass laughs silently, shaking her head as if she’s just been vindicated after months of waiting.

Stephanie, meanwhile, grabs Tim’s arm and shakes him. “You owe me fifty-bucks, Drake.”

Bruce, to his credit, looks unfazed, save for the slight twitch of his eyebrow. He sets his knife down and looks at Jason with a measured expression.

“Well done, son.”

Jason stares at him for a moment before giving him a single nod, as if they’re discussing business strategy rather than his romantic relationship.

You’re still flustered under the sheer weight of all the attention, but then Jason’s fingers interlace with yours under the table. Warm. Steady. Protective. He gives your hand a light squeeze, and just like that, your nerves settle.

The chatter continues, voices overlapping.

“I suppose that means I won the bet?”

The room stills.

Jason’s head snaps up. “Wait. What?”

Tim, not even looking ashamed, shrugs. “Technically, nobody won. We all knew already.”

Damian scowls. “The condition was that someone had to prove it. I did that tonight. Therefore, I win.”

Jason straightens in his chair, voice dangerously low. “Hold on. You had a bet?!”

You grimace, bracing yourself as the night takes a turn.

Tim leans back in his chair, smirking. “Oh, yeah. This has been going for months.”

“How much?” Jason demands, his eyes narrowing.

Dick, grinning, raises his glass. “A hundred bucks.”

Jason turns to you, betrayed. “Did you know about this?”

You shake your head furiously. “I would’ve rigged it to win if I had.”

“Unbelievable,” Jason mutters, rubbing his temples.

But then he feels your thumb brush gently over his knuckles, and suddenly, the noise fades into the background. He turns to you, the frustration melting from his features as he takes in the warmth of your smile, the way your eyes are only on him.

You squeeze his hand. “Well,” you say softly, just for him. “At least we don’t have to sneak around anymore.”

Jason exhales a low chuckle, shaking his head before turning to you fully. There’s adoration in his eyes, open and raw and entirely unguarded. His lips form the silent words, ‘I love you,’ and though no sound escapes, you hear it in the way his eyes soften, in the way his fingers tighten just slightly around yours. Your breath catches, warmth blooming in your chest, and without thinking, you smile radiantly, mirroring the love on his face.

thank you for reading! comments n reblogs are appreciated 💋