#femmebis

[bi-sapphics]

I just wanna say thank you so much for openly talking about bisexual history with the terms butch and femme. I’ve been struggling for a while about using the term butch for myself and even if I’m not in a place right now where I feel safe or valid enough to use it, seeing other bisexual butches wearing the label proudly makes my heart warm. Your work on here is very appreciated and you are an wonderful person <3

As a question, how did you grow comfortable with calling yourself butch in the face of erasure and biphobia?

thank you for the kind ask and you're welcome!! i feel like it's my duty as a butch to protect and serve my community as best as i possibly can ─ after all, what's the point of participating in the culture if you won't play your designated part (regarding sapphic roles & relationships at least, since there are other options/reasons for identifying)?? leading and helping others is what being butch and femme is all about!! historically, back when queer life was extremely dangerous an unaccepted in the united states, butches would always protect femmes and femmes would always (emotionally or otherwise) support butches. of course, the culture isn't limited to that and never was, having strict rules/roles would defeat the point, but it is a widely honored tradition even today. i do post for myself, but i’m also really glad you like my content and excited that i get to educate you a little more, as bi + B/F history and culture is a special interest of mine. :)

i really hope one day soon you can feel safe and open about your butch identity, as i'm sure that's when you'll feel the most free and happy you possibly ever could, but what matters right now is that you have the pride in knowing you connect with other butches and wish to be one of us/them. i would say in a different way i can relate to you ─ i'm not closeted by any means, both online and irl, but i certainly don't "look butch" yet and still have to work on physically getting there, such as shopping for more masc clothes while waiting for my haircut and whatnot. i only feel comfortable considering myself butch for the moment because socially i've already got a masc name & pronouns, and my sense of gender qualifies for the term. it's the best i can do, especially considering i'm still single and not dating a femme right now lmao. point is, nothing's stopping you from knowing who you are and where you want to be, even if there are currently obstacles directly in the way. i hope maybe that's even slightly more comforting to you??

anyway, all of this text and i still haven't answered your question in full. for that, i'd love to mention and lead you over to @femmebis if you aren't already familiar with them!! her historical essay advocating for bisexual usage of butch & femme, as well as all the positivity for us on her blog, is what familiarized me to ballroom culture in a way i could effectively understand and allowed me to feel like it was for me and i wasn't taking anything that wasn't mine. they gave me a sense of belonging and gradually helped me feel comfortable with myself and my own sense of masculinity. honestly, i would say it's this sort of cycle that calls for awakenings like that one i had. we learn from other (and probably older) butches & femmes what it's like to be one of them, and they inspire us to continue the legacy as we see fit. it's part of the tradition across generations and it's what keeps our history alive and well. for that reason, it makes me feel really good that i've inspired you myself and lets me believe that i've already done my part, if only on a miniscule level. 🫶💛

[utensilcreature]

(In order) Bisexual femme, butch, and futch flags <3

[sunshine-sanrio]

I made my own dog ears today because I couldn’t afford to get my own 😖💖

[faithdeans]

boybutch+femmeby bracelets for me and my partner hehe 😊

[bi-dykes]

Alright *cracks knuckles* let’s list all of these (from left to right, each row starting from the top)

Violet bisexual (bisexual who is saph4saph) flag made by @pinescaperers

Bi femme and Bi Butch flags made by @disasterbisexual-moved

Bi Dyke flag made by @dykenotdeer

Lovecore Bi flag made by @ yuzukuro-archive

Bisexual flag made by Michael Page in 1998

Hecatic flag (for all bi sapphics) made by me!

Hesticarn flag (a “girly” version futch) flag made by me!

Goth Bi and Blood Bi flags made by @man4jiro

Selenic Flag (for all bi sapphics) on twitter made by @ LUV4SAPPHICS

Bihet insult-reclaimed flag made by @femmebis

Toxic Bisexual (stereotype reclaimed) flag made by @toxic-bisexual

Bi Girl flag made by @ bizexuality on twitter!

Bisexual Feminist flag made by me!

[caeliangel]

BUTCHFEMME BI FLAGS

butchfemme bi flags by me!

butchfemme bi flags by @/disasterbisexual-moved

butchfemme bi flags by @/furiousfutch-blog (tumblr)

butchfemme bi flags by @/thiefbi

butchfemme bi flags by @/lgbstims

butchfemme bi flags by @/estrogenism

butchfemme bi flags by @/milkcandy

butchfemme bi flags by @/cranechel

butchfemme bi flags by @/gendertreyf

butchfemme bi flags by @/neptuneflags (deactivated)

butchfemme bi flags by @/femmebis

butchfemme bi flags by @/eternaspacic

butchfemme bi flags by @/cottagegothic

FEMME BI FLAGS

femme bi flag by @/iconcupid

femme bi flag by @/parxgender

femme bi flag by @/wuvsbian

BUTCH BI FLAGS

butch bi flag by @/iconcupid

butch bi flag by @/parxgender

butch bi flag by @/just-a-mogai-blog (deactivated)

[spacialrending]

TONED DOWN FLAGS: CAFÉ BI FEMME FLAG

Requested by @blurplecats! Original flag by @/femmebis.

[Photo description: A pride flag with three horizontal stripes. The stripes on the top and bottom are thicker than the stripe in the middle. The thick top stripe is light pink, the thinner middle stripe is dark brown, and the thick bottom stripe is a very light pinkish-brown. End ID]

Likes/reblogs are appreciated if using/saving. Credit is also appreciated.

[katiaodinsen]

The context of the quote that my old account on Twitter said in 2020 when I said "misandry leads to transphobia" was absolutely not that misandry is the root of transmisogyny. Of course that would imply trans women are men which is NOT what I ever meant, that quote came from ME an AMAB sapphic non-binary trans women femmeby who KNOWS I have ALWAYS been a girl, a women and an enby and will throw down with anyone who suggests otherwise. What I meant was gender essentialists (TERFs/GCs) can and do use that rhetoric to manipulatively justify transphobia by lying that trans women are men and that trans men aren't. Since then, I learned about what trans men call transmisandry, which seems to me to be a subset of transmisogny. Tackling Transmisogny and White Supremacy never stopped being intersectional feminists goal. I am starting to really get concerned about SWERFs manipulating trans men/trans masculine people and trans women/trans feminine people into these weird infighting things I'm seeing on Twitter and Discord. There is a SWERF to TERF pipeline. Remember, exclusionary thinking is almost always reactionary. Also to be honest while well "passing" trans people have always been able to recreate elements of cis-patriarchal norms, it's pretty obvious that non-binary people of all varieties, trans men and trans-masculine people and trans women and trans feminine people of course should feel solidarity with other marginalized people. Yes, that obviously includes cis women, especially but not exclusively if they are queer. But it ALSO includes each other. We're not at war with each other. We're at war with the patriarchy & the bourgeoisie.

Let's be intersectional accepting and inclusive everyone!!!

[37q]

ok last thought: being a "woman" in overwhelmingly queer spaces takes so many people off guard and im obsessed w disrupting scripts but now im just another normie they/she femmeby 😔

[unholyplumpprincess]

Happy trans day of visibility my loves! If femme x Lovecore or Valentines day was a gender thatd be me and it's an honor to represent the pink femmeby bitches

[bi-sapphics]

finding another butch bi sapphic using one of femmebis’ icons and telling dyke & b/f & ⚢ gatekeepers to fuck off in their bio?? WOW i can’t believe we actually exist in numbers!! that’s so based and noomf if u ever see this know that i now love u /p  🫶

[observedintoexistence]

hi hello hey ✨

what do you mean by femmeby messages?

Oh that's the start of a new sentence. My other blog is femmeby (VERY NSFW)

Also, messages are always welcome

Also hi :3

[pridewishes]

would you be okay using this https://www.tumblr.com/femmebis/190847414747 flag? sorry for long link, can’t actually link in anons anymore :(

Omg yeah! We might actually do some self indulgent things with that flag that's such a cute one! :]

[duskbornbaker]

// Fina is high femmeby of the century

[bi-dykes]

Bi dykes and bihets are going to break into your house and steal your lava lamp (as we should) There is no insult or slur that you can throw at us that’ll change the fact that we are bisexual <3

note: bihet is just reclaiming the insult, it is not an identity or romantic/sexual orientation. bisexuals are not hets <3

bi dyke flag made by @dykenotdeer

bihet insult-reclaimed flag made by @femmebis

[allthebestcowgirls]

your bihet mandomera flag took me the fuck out ahdkdhsgskflshag

lmaoo sjjwjejs both of them simply are just bihets... so like... relationship goals ❤️