#figured out by further navigation when what's more honestly going on is that they want more options in how they interact w/each other

[unproduciblesmackdown]

ideal scenario is that i like thinking about this like, essential short story adventure where winston and tuk hook up w/a couple [that bachelorette party] members, and as a foursome/quartet because they have these parallel stories of two pairs of friends who are like "sure i'd have sex with you if things aligned for that" and now are living that short story about expanding a dynamic & becoming closer friends for the end of it (of course billions only wrote winston as standing next to tuk next episode, instead of rian as he's often written to be standing with incl in a previous finale, to shove him out of the path of getting material and let taylor have confusing nonresolution w/rian based on this proximity and coincidence instead. but who can't say that that, And winston next not even trying to sit with tmc in the last finale appearance which at this point is probably for the best and instead again hanging out with tuk and then ben, isn't about having been closer for whatever all happened there in obtaining casual sex together)

and they can have perpendicular stories of also just having some nice chats and enjoying other interactions together such that maybe it's just fun for this one night of crossing paths, maybe anyone stays in touch at all, who even knows, if winston or tuk are dating anyone it's probably only going to come up again in how they were last dumped for being too much effort for how unepic they are, so godspeed to offscreen unmentioned dating. but just friendly acquaintanceship, or again this one-time spontaneously crossed paths night's acquaintanceship, is also a lot of fun. and why not imagine that winston "he's not allowed to not feel self-loathing or, by doing basic things like talking or initiating Or oppositng anything, Not operating as though he's too low in a social hierarchy here to be allowed thusly" type of material where his spontaneity, vivacity to bon vivantocity, self-assurance that is apparently arrogance/aggression to every who thinks he ought to be self-effacing instead, etc, is actually just a social success in other less wretched non-work situations, and his personality is taken as a contribution to the proceedings even before anyone takes up his proffered contribution of himself as a potential sexual partner. and lending confidence to tuk as like one person who won't, at any given time, go into hostile mode with him or even like take up the position of issuing this criticism, which is an inherently elevated (over tuk) one when it's a unilateral thing. such that tuk's personality can be a potential contribution as well. and winston and tuk's Friendship Developing Moments can be happening then, too, b/c Maybe they've hung out outside work on their own aleady, but also maybe they've never really been interacting with a larger group outside work, such that that group is less likely to include some people, or entirely people, who will suddenly go sicko mode on either or both of them. and then meanwhile, who knows anything abt this bachelorette party, could be already a cohesive friend group who all see each other all the time, or people who see each other more infrequently meeting up on this trip, or a mix; could be fun and chill or something so scheduled/demanding it's kind of like a work trip, or fluctuate....and of course zero info abt the individuals such that imagining anything abt them is entire OC territory, and i'm bad at that, or at coming up with stories, so not exactly a lot of details here from me but godspeed if two of them unlock another tier of friendship here b/c like parallel to winston and tuk, they're like hmm okay so we're mutually down re: potentially having a foursome here, and spending some time away from the larger group

(or of course the scenario that tuk and winston can also have that moment but just as putting "and/or: a threesome?" as an option, and that tips the scales for someone who might've otherwise felt more indecisive like "hmmmm casual convenient hookup, or spending more time out & about like this / whatever other activity...." but then is like oho Well, if it's a threesome, i'll seize that opportunity, sure....such that then maybe afterwards [winston and tuk hanging out together] happens sooner, if the third member feels more third wheel about things lol, since now they'd be the only two who already know each other. like ooh who knows, round n+1 in the aftermath just one on one (and/or i mean, maybe another thing the third party's still around for, re: further casual sex opportunities that don't just fall into your lap every day), and/or talk, watch tron together, go back out on the town even. where the conclusion of this truly is the essence of "it Is easy to imagine that winston and tuk are real Genuine Friends for the implicit further offscreen time spent together outside work / interactions between them here. and fun" and with that flair of "and give that a juxtaposed parallel in it being the same for a couple bachelorette attendees, why not, good for them"

[chlerc]

consequences of nothing ; jude bellingham

— summary; he broke your heart last weekend, told you it would feel better this weekend but he’s here this weekend and wanting you to patch him up.

pairings — jude bellingham x kinda-casual-fling-f. reader! ( third person story )

word count — 1420.

content — angst, a lot of angst (i think???) ALCOHOL consumption on jude’s side, please be aware! drunk and injured jude rambling about loving her, wanting her to fix him up but he’s just a selfish man.

NAVIGATION + author’s note: this was supposed to be a drabble but i guess it’s a slightly extended version. i love the angst and jude combination also there’s no part 2’s to this!

LOUD, INCESSANT AND URGENT knocks were not what she expected to be hearing at half past two in the morning on a Friday night. The thud of a body against the door of her apartment drew her closer towards the visitor beyond the other side of the door. Knocks there came thrice, strong and loud, and so the door was opened wide.

His tall figure towering over her, arm rested on the door frame. Dry blood is apparent on the right corner of his lips, a gash above his eyebrow on the left with another right at his nose bridge along with purple splotches on his cheek. “Jude…” Her words came out barely a whisper from her lips, concern clearly laced in her voice.

She hates doing this, all this after last weekend but she stepped aside for him to enter. His eyes looked hazy from all the alcohol consumption but he strutted to the couch of an apartment he was too familiar with. In the light that flows water-like through the windows of the old bank, Jude strips off his topmost layer. On each arm there are great purple welts that will only deepen over the coming week.

Against his skin they were grotesque, but Jude knew how lucky he was not to have broken bones — then what would he do? Miss training and matches, explaining to the media he was under the influence of alcohol that night and got engrossed in a fight?

“Those are outrageous Jude, what were you doing? You reek of alcohol, should you be drinking this much?” She’s leaning by the dining table, eyes running over the state he had been in. He only shrugs his shoulders in response, clearly brushing her off. “You shouldn’t be here, go to the hospital and get everything checked out, Jude. I’m not a nurse, I can’t help you in this situation.”

But when he’s staring right into her eyes, his eyes are so different in moments like these, more soft than she knew eyes could be. The professional man is gone and instead it is the eyes of one who loves deeply. If it were anyone else she would drop her gaze, but with him she was drawn in closer, always wanting more. Never getting more.

“I know, but I want you to help me.” He threw the cotton swabs her way, the cream in his grasp. “That’s not what you said last week, Jude.” He winces at her response yet acting like it was from her application of the cream and the contact with his open wound. “Hey, would you be more gentle? This actually hurts more than I thought.”

She giggles and it’s like he felt better right at hearing the sound of her giggle knowing that he was the reason behind it. “I’m sorry.” His apology was short and sweet, with no further elaboration but they both knew what’s wrong. “Forget it Jude, I’ll be better this way.”

Being away from him and living her own life — better that way? That wasn’t what he wanted when he said all those last week though, not even close. “Better off without me?” He chuckles, an eyebrow cocked from the bandage she stuck on. “Who got you injured this badly, you didn’t even get to play with the suspension?”

She was avoiding the question and he knew it yet honestly who would ever open the door and clean his wounds up after all he did and said. “It’s complicated, you haven’t answered my question.” Jude mumbles, swatting her hand away from the overbearing pain from the cut on his nose.

“Yeah, better off without you. Better off you breaking my heart last week and telling me I’d feel better by this weekend but you’re here this weekend. You’re here nearing three in the morning for me to treat your wounds that I don’t even know how you got them. You’re here though you walked out on me screaming your name.” Tears came as if her pain had at last condensed into a deluge of rain, running her fingers through her strands while rambling.

“All those things I said and did last weekend, I didn’t mean them,” His voice wavered, choking as he swallowed. “All week I awaited your phone calls, texts and everything else from you. I left a voicemail and messages for you to call me back when you get a minute.” Jude was reasoning like everything he did was justifiable, feigning his anger over her actions.

“Go ahead, blame it all on me for not replying or calling back. You find it in your own heart if you’d ever have the guts to do all that after the woman you loved led you on and asked you to leave her alone.” She pokes her finger at his chest, each action hard enough to push him back.

“Led you on? I never did that.” Jude huffs, rubbing the cream on his arm by himself. “You never led me on? You also never gave a clear signal if you wanted me, never said if we were together. You don’t get to show up at my house and say all this, Jude.” Her arms are now on her waist as she stood up from the arm of the couch she was sitting on, hair all tousled from her fingers running through them.

“I literally could go wherever I want but just not home, home with all the remnants and reminders of you.” He’s looking into her eyes, tears welled up behind his eyes with each word he uttered and he barely cried at everything else. Neither of them could ever believe he was there, tears in his eyes while trying to get the girl back. “We’re getting nowhere going back and forth with this, Jude. You should head home, you’re probably just under the influence and will regret saying all this tomorrow.”

“I swear I’m literally sober m’ love, please don’t do this to me. I swear I’ll make everything alright, I’ll make everything okay just give me a chance.” Hearing her nickname roll from his tongue effortlessly was a stab in her heart, heart swelling from his words while she bit on her lower lip. “You never really cared about the way everything that turned out Jude, you didn’t wanna fall in love. I thought I had you figured out but you’re just looking out for yourself.”

“But I do love you, please trust me I really do. I know I smell like alcohol and all but I swear I’m sober. And I know that’s the last thing you wanna hear right now, that I love you. I promise I’ll be back tomorrow and give you time to think about it or just sleep it off.” She thought that she was dreaming when she heard him say that he loved her, watching him grab the leather jacket while he tugged himself sluggishly towards the door.

“Also, these rough punches were from Vini and the others. I told them to get me so battered so I could come here for you to patch me up like you always do. Should’ve told him to lay it off but it’s worth it. Goodnight m’ love, remember to lock the door after I leave.” There’s a slight lifting of his lips on one end as he gazes over his shoulders to look at her, throwing a thumbs up before walking out and closing the door behind.

And when he walked out that door tonight, he left his heart with her to meddle with. But if it all ended tomorrow, would she still be the one on his mind? Would she still be the one he wanted if the sun refused to shine? Would he still want her there? He wouldn’t. Jude never cared for anyone else but him and his career, those were just words and actions laced with the effect of the alcohol or the punches thrown at him earlier.

These were just consequences of the nothing he wanted to turn into something. At the end of the day, he’s the one wincing about the nothing that was never something when questioned about it. And those were the words he told her and everyone else — that they were never something.

[wackybuddiemewbs]

So yeah, apparently, more shenanigan going on in this wacky brain. Make of that what you will... or don't. Cheers!

This Future We Choose

Part 2/???

Part 1 • Part 3

“Alright, couch or bed?”

“Couch. If I have to climb any more stairs, I think I’m actually gonna start to cry. Even with pain meds,” Buck says, still heavily leaning against Eddie as he maneuvers them inside Buck’s loft.

“Yeah, bruised ribs are a bitch. But hey, at least you didn’t break any. So you’ll be as good as new in no time,” Eddie says, probably more to reassure himself than anything else. But Buck lets it slide, for which he is glad.

Eddie knows it wasn’t that much of a big deal. Then again, nothing seems big compared to the lightning strike. Because Buck died. Still, the moment the rope gave way and Buck got knocked against one of the steel beams at the factory, Eddie could swear he felt rain on his skin and saw lighting strike before his eyes.

In the end, Buck got away with mild injuries, three bruised ribs, some scrapes and some more bruises that are going to mar one side that had the Lichtenberg figures not too long ago. Eddie tends to think it’s almost ironic that those are meant to fade as well, without a trace.

No one asked any questions when he said he was going to crash over at Buck’s to have an eye on him. Christopher is out until Tuesday for that science fair upstate, so he doesn’t have to worry about making arrangements.

Eddie helps Buck navigate to the couch. His hand ghosts over Buck’s back as he sits down with a moan. “You good?”

“Relatively,” Buck says with a tight grimace, trying to ease back on the couch.

“Good enough for me. And I appreciate the honestly. Would not have expected that from you,” Eddie huffs. “Alright, when’s the last time you’ve had anything to drink or eat?”

“Breakfast at the station and apple juice at the hospital,” Buck recounts.

“Okay, then I’m gonna fix you a sandwich and something to chug it down with, and then you take the meds? You shouldn’t take those on an empty stomach,” Eddie offers.

“Sounds good,” Buck replies, then averts his gaze. “I mean, sorry, you don’t have to…”

“Buck.”

“Sorry.”

Eddie hates that for Buck. He knows Buck is trying to change those habits, to break through those patterns that tell him that he doesn’t deserve people worrying about him. And Eddie knows how hard it is to break out of patterns, especially those you have perfected for years. And God knows Buck learned to perfect those.

“Just remember it’s not imposing if people are willing to offer help,” Eddie reminds him, almost in a sing-song.

Buck tilts his chin down. “I’m getting there.”

“Oh yeah, you are,” Eddie huffs. “I’m not taking up with that indefinitely.”

Buck grins at that. “Something tells me you would.”

“Yeah, I would,” Eddie has to admit. “But… I’d still rather not!”

“Fair.”

Finding Buck set well enough for the moment, Eddie makes his way to the kitchen to fix him something to eat and drink. Thankfully, Buck remains a create of habit, which means he finds everything where it should be. Though Eddie can’t help a frown at that realization. Because it’s so given to him to know where Buck stores what. But that may well be because it’s been a while since he’s been in the loft last.

He has to look no further than the dining table to find confirmation for his absence from the apartment. Papers, brochures, and written notes are strewn across it. Papers and brochures with smiling children on them. Adoption this, fostering that.

“You’re… deep down the rabbit hole for research, huh?” Eddie says, trying to sound casual as he walks past the table, carrying the sandwich and the glass of water with him.

Buck gives him a quizzical look he can’t really put. “So to speak. I… I always feel like researching extensively helps me. Like, to be more calm about it.”

“Why’d you be spooked?” Eddie asks.

“Well, there’s a difference between wanting something like that and actually… looking at the prospect of it.”

“Right.”

Eddie can still remember the anxiety, the crawling under his skin, after Shannon showed him the pregnancy test that confirmed their lives were about to change forever. Would he be a good father? Would he be enough for that child? He didn’t know, and it made him want to run. He eventually ended up running, for a multitude of reasons.

“I mean, when it comes to fostering, you could’ve asked Hen about it. She’s the expert on that, undoubtedly.”

“I… haven’t told anyone yet. If I tell Hen, Chim knows, if Chim knows, Maddie knows, which means that by the next time I’m at work, the whole station and dispatch will know.”

“I guess you got a point there,” Eddie is bound to agree. “Well, my lips remain sealed until you feel ready.”

“Thanks for that. I appreciate it, I do.”

“Don’t mention it.” Eddie sits down next to him on the couch. He holds out the plate to him. “There you go.”

“Thanks.”

Eddie winces in sympathy as Buck really struggles his way through eating and drinking, as moving his right arm always seems to rub the wrong way against his ribs. Though once the pills are downed, both know that Buck will soon find the much-needed and much-deserved relief.

Eddie keeps shifting in his seat, wrinkling his nose.

“Got ants in your pants?” Buck snorts.

“I seriously hate your couch,” Eddie grumbles, trying to find a position that’s not completely terrible. Though he did not yet succeed, even though he’s spent some very uncomfortable hours on it by now.

“I had other things in mind recently than going shopping for furniture,” Buck snorts, amused.

“I still hate it. How did you ever pick that one out? It’s potentially more uncomfortable than the one you had before,” Eddie keeps going. “And that one was pretty damn terrible already.”

“I dodged a bullet with this one. My mom wanted to pick one out for me. And my back hurt just looking at it. Also, the pattern was just about awful… which is to say, it had a damn pattern, okay?” Buck huffs.

“Your back’s gonna hurt if you nap on it tonight, that’s for sure,” Eddie warns him.

“Well, if my back hurts more than my ribs, they might cancel each other out,” Buck ponders.

Eddie rolls his eyes. “You know this is not how it works, right?”

“The pain meds are starting to kick in, I’ll be walking on the clouds soon, man. The couch’s gonna be the least of my concerns, at least until morning.”

“Well, next time you pick out a couch, Chris and I will be coming with you. You can’t be trusted with these choices, man,” Eddie huffs.

“Since when do I have to ask you for permission to buy the couch I wanna have?”

“Since we spend a great deal of time here with you, so the least you could do is pick one that’s not a literal pain in the butt.”

At least it used to be like that. These days, they are hardly here. Just like Buck is hardly over at their place. Or else Eddie would have known about the research, among other things.

“And you wonder why Christopher is becoming a food snob. You’re a couch snob, dude.”

“You should get one like mine. You’ve been practically glued to that one for ages.”

Buck grins at that. “My butt definitely left an impression on it by now.”

“See, I’m right.”

“I won’t be a getting a couch like yours, though,” Buck grumbles.

“Why not?”

“Because…,” Buck wants to say, but then he stops himself. His eyes shift away before he adds, “I will definitely find a better one than that. And you’re gonna be mad about it.”

Suddenly, Eddie starts to get this sinking feeling that they stopped talking about the couches about a minute earlier. What Eddie doesn’t understand why he keeps prodding that way. That’s unlike him. Sure enough, they love to tease each other about such things, but it feels different for reasons Eddie can’t put his finger on.

“So… how’re things going with Marisol?”

Apparently, Eddie is not the only one ready to prod.

“Oh, ugh… things are good,” Eddie says, though he knows that was about as convincing as Christopher is when he lies about how much time he spent gaming again.

“Damn, I should’ve asked earlier,” Buck huffs.

“What? I said it’s good.”

Buck gives him a look. “And good means something’s afoot, if you say it in that tone of voice.”

“I’m not…,” Eddie wants to begin, but Buck beats him to it, “Eddie. I know you. So let’s just cut the crap, yeah?”

That’s the trouble of being best friends with someone, knowing someone like the back of your hand: The other person is going to do the same. Buck knows him.

Eddie sighs. “I… don’t know. Things are definitely different from what they were with Ana. But… I don’t know where this is heading, honestly.”

“How do you mean?” Buck asks, without the tease this time, just genuinely interested.

“I like her a lot.”

“Which is good, for a girlfriend.”

“I mean, we have fun. She’s good with Christopher. Her brother’s been a bit weird, but I can’t say that my family’s strictly normal either…”

Buck snorts at that. “That’s coz you’re as weird as we are. You just pretend to be normal.”

“Anyway. What I’m trying to say is… I enjoy spending time with her. And it’s not like it was with Ana, where it felt like we had to hit certain milestones, like we were this ready-made family. We’re just… together. And that’s great. But…,” Eddie says, fidgeting for the words, but Buck seems to find them for him faster, “But you don’t know where this is headed next. And she doesn’t seem to know either.”

“I guess.”

“Well, it’s okay to take the time to find that out. Casual relationships aren’t the devil,” Buck argues. “The problem is if one side thinks it’s more than that, and the other doesn’t.”

“Right.”

Because that’s what happened between him and Ana. And it was Buck who forced Eddie to take a long, good look at that reality. Because it wasn’t fair of him, to go on like this was heading somewhere, even though he didn’t feel for her in just that way.

“Do you think she wants more out of the relationship?” Buck asks in a quieter tone.

“I didn’t get the impression yet,” Eddie answers, wrinkling his nose.

Buck licks his lips, but he won’t look at him when he starts to speak again. “… Do you?”

“I… know I don’t want to have a casual relationship indefinitely,” Eddie says with some confidence. He enjoys himself alright, but he knows he wants a steady relationship eventually. He just doesn’t want to rush things, as he’s done it before.

“But do you want to have a serious relationship with her, or…?”

“I… don’t know,” Eddie admits.

Buck gives him that funny look again he can’t read. “Well, seems like I’m not the only one who’s got some figuring out to do.”

Eddie shrugs. “Birds of feather and all.”

“But just to be sure… even though I have proven plenty that I’m not great giving relationship advice to any of my Diaz boys, offer stands for you the same way it stands for me: You wanna talk about it? You come to me, okay?”

“Okay.” Eddie smiles.

“You promise me that?”

“Yeah, I promise.”

“Good,” Buck sighs, shifting uncomfortably on the couch. “I will hold you to that, granted that I will remember any of this. Because I feel like the meds are about to eat my brain.”

“Then they’d starve, don’t you think?” Eddie snorts.

“Very funny.”

“I’m a very funny man.”

“Try telling your son that. He thinks you’re just cringe.”

“Please, that kid has not developed a proper sense of humor yet. He still laughs at fart jokes.”

“They are solid, sometimes.”

“God, you’re terrible.”

They fall into an oddly uncomfortable silence, and for once it’s not because of Buck’s stupid new couch. Because he didn’t know about Buck’s research, even though it’s his business to know all there is to know about Buck. Because Buck asks questions he can’t answer. Because Buck won’t be picking their couch over his own, even though it’s the better one. Because they talk about one thing but mean another.

“Eddie?”

He whips his head around. “Hm?”

“Do you ever… feel reminded on the job, of the time you got shot?” Buck asks, not looking at him.

“Well, that’s a drastic change of subject,” Eddie huffs, feeling the tendons in his shoulder flex painfully.

“Maintaining a chain of thought becomes more and more difficult for me from now on, given that the meds work faster than they usually do,” Buck informs him. “So you’ll have to deal with me asking random shit. You can choose not to answer, but don’t expect me to keep a coherent line or argumentation here.”

“Why do you ask? Did you feel reminded of the lightning strike today?” Eddie questions.

Buck shrugs. “Yeah.”

“Well, flashbacks are a thing.”

“So you do, feel reminded?” Buck looks at him, but Eddie won’t look back at him as he answers, “Yeah, sometimes.”

“How much do you remember?”

“It’s still mostly just bits and pieces, honestly. The pain, the blood, the ambulance…” Eddie purses his lips.

It is true, he doesn’t remember all of it. But he remembers more than those three things. He talked to Frank about it by now, and Frank assured him that it’s okay not to share that with anyone until he feels ready for it. Still, it always feels like a small betrayal. Because Buck was there with him. He saw it all happen. He could probably fill in all the holes Eddie has in his memory. But honestly? He doesn’t want them. He has got enough on his plate, dealing with what he can remember.

Like Buck’s bloody face. The fear that he’d gotten hit as well. The terror in his big blue eyes. Seeing Buck crawl under the truck, putting himself right out there for the sniper to take a shot at him as well. He remembers being called back to Buck under the ladder truck. And how he wondered for a brief moment if Buck was still afraid of that.

But mostly the blood on his face. That image is scourged into his brain. It keeps haunting him, though not as often these days. Some nights, he still dreams about it. Just that it’s not his blood, but Buck’s own. How bullet after bullet wrecks his body, tears him apart. And Eddie can’t save him. He can’t reach him in time.

Though that nightmare happens less often. When he has a bad dream about Buck these days, it’s about the lightning strike. How his heart never starts beating again. How three minutes and seventeen seconds turned to eighteen, nineteen, twenty. Minutes to hours. Hours to days. How they pull the plug and he doesn’t start breathing on his own. How he has to hold Christopher as he calls out to Buck to wake up, please wake up. How he’d have two graves to visit from that point on. How alone he’d be, raising Christopher without him.

“Sorry, I wasn’t… I didn’t wanna push you or anything,” Buck says, pulling Eddie away from the cemetery and back to Buck looking at him with a concerned facial expression.

“What? No, you weren’t… It’s okay, I just… got into my head for a moment,” Eddie adds quickly.

Buck ducks his head. “Sorry.”

“Buck, nothing to be sorry for. It’s okay to talk about it,” Eddie assures him.

Wasn’t he the one to tell his son that talking about it made it less scary? So why is he afraid of talking about it to Buck of all people?

Because I lost him, actually lost him. For three minutes and seventeen seconds…

And Eddie doesn’t want to lose him again, less so to those memories of a world that momentarily didn’t have Buck in it.

“Right.” Buck averts his gaze, and for good reason, Eddie has to admit.

Because it’s a lie, and they both know that it is. It’s not okay with him yet, to talk about it. Eddie doesn’t talk about it, not to Buck. Not like this. They brush the topic, but then they gloss over it, change subject, move on. Because he wants to move on from this.

Kind of hypocritical, isn’t it?

To tell Buck that he can talk to him about whatever it is, to tell him that it’s okay to talk about the lighting strike and how it made him feel, to die… only to not speak of it himself? Maybe Buck was right about it, as much as it had pained him. That Natalia saw him in a way that even Eddie hadn’t. Because Eddie can’t look at Buck being in pain, and not think back to those three minutes and seventeen seconds, can’t recount the cold dread he’d felt.

“Do you want to talk about today?” Eddie asks cautiously, cowardly, really.

Because he asks Buck to do what he doesn’t do himself.

“Nah, I just… there was this moment… it put me right back there… and it got me thinking if it was the same for you, is all,” Buck says.

And it’s a half-truth Eddie will have to give him. Because Eddie can’t expect perfect honesty and openness from Buck if he doesn’t open up himself. In the back of his head, he can almost hear Frank shaking his head at him, scribbling notes he won’t let him counter-check. Because Eddie knows he has to learn to open up about those things. He knows that eating it up is not doing him any favors.

“I fear that’s gonna keep happening,” Eddie chooses to say.

Buck shrugs. “Yeah, I know. This isn’t unfamiliar to me.”

The nonchalance of that statement has Eddie staring at him for a moment. “Isn’t it?”

Buck shakes his head. “You wouldn’t want to know how many times I thought I heard a bomb going off under our feet. Or thought I saw a giant wave coming, to sweep us off the beach. Or… thought I saw someone in a window who’d want to shoot one of us in bright daylight…”

He cuts himself off there, cuts that line, discards it and throws all attached to it away. Eddie watches Buck’s demeanor change, or rather, the mask slipping up his face.

“I just wondered if, if… you also had that. Dunno.”

Eddie knows he should want to know, but Buck is right. He doesn’t really. Because it shows him how little they actually talked about this, when they can normally talk about anything. But those things, those memories, they were something they kept close to their chest, inside their rib cages, to keep the blood from oozing out.

“Yeah, I do,” Eddie replies. That is the truth, but he knows he is only admitting to the easy one. To answer the if and not the how.

“Hm,” Buck hums, blinking repeatedly. It appears the pain meds are acting in Eddie’s favor tonight. Buck is minutes from falling asleep, so whatever questions he might still have, Eddie won’t have to stutter his way through an answer, or find a way to navigate past it, well within Buck’s view.

“Wanna move upstairs after all?” he asks. “You’re about to fall asleep on me.”

Buck scrunches his nose. “Nah, I’ll just… I wanna stay here. No stairs.”

“Well, if you wake up with a bad back…”

“You get to tell me you told me so.”

“Alright, then lemme grab some cushions and a blanket at least,” Eddie offers.

And this time, Buck isn’t fighting him. “Thanks.”

“Never for that.”

“Always stuck taking care of me, aren’t you?” A tired smile tugs at Buck’s lips as he looks at him.

Eddie can tell that Buck is already on the way to La-La-Land, almost all the way there already, with his lopsided smile and droopy eyes. He also knows he means it as a joke, but Eddie doesn’t.

“Like you’re with me. And I’m glad for that.”

Buck blinks at him, wrinkles his nose with a pensive frown, catching at least some of the meaning, as far as Eddie can tell. He leaves it at that to proceed upstairs to gather pillows and blankets to make Buck at least somewhat comfortable on the couch.

By the time he comes back down, Buck is fast asleep on the couch, looking ridiculously small for a guy of Buck’s build. At least he looks peaceful like that, which means the pain meds must do their job.

Eddie manages to stuff a pillow under Buck’s head without rousing him. He continues with the blanket, draping it over Buck. Once satisfied, Eddie looks back down at Buck’s sleeping form.

Last time he saw him sleep was when Buck had enough of his sister sending people to visit him all the while and he escaped to Eddie’s to finally get some rest. Back then, it’d felt like they were moving in the right direction again. That Buck was getting back on his feet. But looking at him now, Eddie is no longer that sure they are headed in the right direction. Or rather, he is not sure he likes to where they are currently headed.

Because he didn’t know about Buck’s latest research ventures. Because there is another plant he added to his collection that Eddie didn’t get to ask the scientific name for. Because they should be able to talk about anything, but they aren’t. He isn’t. Because Buck wants to find his happiness, is searching for a new purpose, and Eddie wants to be happy for him, but he also feels like his heart is tearing in two. Because Christopher and him are not at the center of it. Because none of it makes sense. Because he should be happy, right? Right?

Absent-minded, Eddie brushes a strand of Buck’s hair back that he managed to smudge downward in his sleep.

Just how can he touch him, be this close to him, and still feel as though there were a hundred miles between them?

And how did we get here, even though we know each other better than we know ourselves?

[curtsbigspoon]

ship headcanons? 🤲🏻

I am so sorry anon, I feel I'm too neurodivergent and couldn't figure out whether you meant who I ship in mota, or how I imagine the ship dynamics working. Anyways, have a bit of both!

Rosie x Me (obviously)

Gale x John

Gale x John x Curt

Crosby x Bubbles

Crosby x Rosie

Honestly, I'll ship most of the mfs in this show, they're all attractive and personally? I think they need their ass ate

LAST MINUTE SO I HAVE NOTHING FOR HIM YET BUT KEN VS EVERYONE

Now, headcanons of the pairs?

Rosie x Me: Every night I spread him open and- ((GUNSHOTS))

Gale x John: I might expand on this in a post, because I feel it is very important for the progress of humanities evolution, but, John fucking loves Gale's ass. Downright worships it, thinks it's the perfect shape, likes to take advantage when no one's looking, grabs fistfuls of it until the entire thing's in his palms, until Gale's leaning his head back to hiss, "John," whilst he's all toothy grin kneading it with his fingers. On the other side, when John gets a little too hyped up and starts acting out, Gale's liable to either grab him by the scruff of the collar, or the hair, tug him down real close, voice low, total warning in his voice. John either pipes down immediately like a scolded puppy, or he pushes further, wants to see how far he can go.

Gale x John x Curt: Honestly this might need a separate post because I'll yap my lips off, but I'll give this much at least: Gale leads, he looks after the other two, tries to keep them out of trouble, holds most of the control. Bucky and Curt are like a duo pair, if chaos is happening, it's probably them that caused it. You'll usually find Gale, head in his hands at the scene of the crime, shaking his head, finding them both later with two very guilty expressions on their face. They follow him around like puppies, seeking his praise, his attention, being rivals about it, but also finding love in one another, playing together when Gale's not around to sate them.

Crosby x Bubbles: I haven't thought too much on these two to be clear, but I still like the pairing, and I very much envision them like sweethearts. They've been best friends for as long as they've known one another, always showing up at the end of the other's mission, checking in, updating each other about everything. Finding innocent little ways to brush against one another, risking someone else seeing their hands grazing together whilst they walk because they can just play it off as sheer accident. They laugh when they kiss, giggles falling between the spaces of each other's lips, cheeks flushing rosy, pure sweet joy and adoration.

Crosby x Rosie: Rosie's one of the best pilots and Crosby's a group navigator, of course the two of them find moments to spend time with each other. At first it's for mutual gain, Crosby's looking for someone else to occupy his mind from all the loss, looking for someone to make him feel a little better about himself and the decisions he's making. Rosie gives him that, obvious about his relief when Crosby reassures him of certain mission plans, enjoy the ease of stress to his shoulders - because as much as he loves his crew and his friends, he can never get the guilt out of his head of the responsibility he has to ensure their lives are as secure as his during every flight - Crosby understanding that pressure is something he finds comfort in. They find out that they both share similarities in lack of sleep, deciding to spend the empty hours together rather than alone dwelling in their mourning and guilt. It makes it easier, making each other coffee, sometimes just sitting in silence with the other present, other times taking the pressure off by having a chat and it turns into soft laughter echoing through.

Someone put me down. I can't say more or this will turn into a damn essay. I'm so sorry anon, you probably didn't ask for this, but I had no idea what you meant and it was only meant to be short but then- ((TASER GOES OFF))

If y'all need anything expanded on, or want me to clarify on more specific brainrots, please lemme know I have so much brewing!

[eureka-its-zico]

i’m so sorry for your loss. grief can be a weird/scary thing to navigate. last year, i found this comment on reddit that explains grief and how it feels. it’s a little long, but it’s helped me a lot with my dad’s passing. i figured maybe it can help you too ♥️

———

As for grief, you'll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you're drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it's some physical thing. Maybe it's a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it's a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.

In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don't even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you'll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what's going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything...and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.

Somewhere down the line, and it's different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O'Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you'll come out.

Take it from an old guy. The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don't really want them to. But you learn that you'll survive them. And other waves will come. And you'll survive them too. If you're lucky, you'll have lots of scars from lots of loves. And lots of shipwrecks.

———

From the bottom of my heart: thank you for this.

I’ve read this over and over what feels like a hundred times. Each time I’ve read it, it seemed I understood it in a new way. I have days where it feels like the waves aren’t suffocating. Where the shipwreck of my loss doesn’t feel like it’s relentlessly pulling me under, while others days it’s completely drowning me.

It’s so weird. I expect to wake up and just start talking to her. Getting on instagram, Tumblr, TikTok, or even just opening our texts reminds me with painful clarity it won’t happen.

I started playing Baldur’s Gate 3 for her last year. She kept telling me Astarion is not only a sassy vampire who I would love, but he had one of the most painful angsty backstories ever. She honestly wasn’t wrong. I finally was able to finish it for her. Even if I literally cried at random moments and had to get up and take a break. I wish I could discuss him with her. Tell her a whole lot of things and have her talk me into writing for him (aka something for her). Although I can’t tell her what impact his storyline had on me, I decided to still write it out and send it to her. To let her know - if she already doesn’t.

Thank you, again, for taking the time to send me this. I absolutely appreciate you sending something that conveys in the most tragically beautiful way what it means to miss someone always 🖤

P.s. I am so incredibly sorry to read about your loss🖤

[umbracirrus]

WIP Wednesday💛

Ahhhh, Wednesday. And today has been a productive one! Lot of writing done, a lot more to do, and I can say for certain that the next chapter of The Perfect Storm is going to be a bumper one! And to mirror what I posted this morning, if Elyse had a septim for every time she had a poison in her hand with a blade at her neck, she'd have two septims - not a lot, but weird that it happened twice and technically once was in a nightmare but you get the point heh.

I'm not going to tag anyone specific, and instead do an open tag for anyone who wants to say that I tagged them 💛

As Elyse brushed the cobwebs off her hands on her clothes, then scowled as she noticed that there was skeever blood on her boots, she began to feel a cold draught coming from nearby. That meant that she had to be near some sort of exit.

Carefully stepping over the unconscious man, she began to walk towards where the cool air was coming from, resisting the urge to wrap her cloak around herself just in case there were any more surprises which needed her to draw upon her spells once more. There was a slight tunnel, just enough for a person to navigate through, though was particularly dark – unsettlingly so. She had to cast a magelight spell purely to see where she was going.

Soon enough, a gentle light – no doubt that of either a lantern or a handful of candles – began to seep into the darkness and gave her a sense of ease.

Then there was a large, gaping hole leading into a room which looked similar to the basement she had entered that small cave system through. A room adorned with barrel after barrel of mead, though quite a few had obvious bite marks and chipped wood scattered around them, leaving the floor both sticky and wet with the scent of honey and alcohol permeating the air. It looked stagnant and foul, with bugs hovering over the pools of mead. She had but one thought in response to that as she felt the liquid seeping into her boots through the stitching - had Sabjorn honestly not checked on the state of his Meadery once since the skeever problem started?

There was also a door further into the room, which she was very glad to reach as the floor around it was dry and gave her the opportunity to shake off her boots as much as she could just to stop the squelching of each step she took. The door was wide open, though not leading outdoors as she had first anticipated because of just how cold the room was. Instead, it led to a room with yet more barrels, and huge vats of mead. There were also numerous sacks across the borders of the room, and an abandoned satchel in the middle of the floor which looked very much out of place.

She approached it, and went to pick it up, just for something to roll out as she did so... A small bottle with a somewhat viscous liquid of an incredibly off-putting reddish brown colour, almost reminding her of medicine, contained within. The only definitive thing about it that she could discern was that it definitely not mead... But so long as her alchemy skills hadn’t gone to waste during her time in Dragonsreach, she could probably figure out what it was.

She barely had to examine the liquid in the bottle for long after opening it before she could detect the delicate scent of nightshade flowers, and her eyes grew wide as she put the stopper back in place, not wanting nor willing to smell it any longer. Nightshade was a common ingredient for poisons… and that was all she needed to know to conclude what it was. It was almost certainly the poison which Sabjorn claimed that his employee went to collect just for it to ‘not be ready yet’. There was even a handwritten receipt from Arcadia in the satchel, when she checked back inside it.

This wasn’t an out-of-control skeever problem... This was sabotage.

Just as she turned around to go back the way that she had come from, to let Sabjorn and Lydia know about what she had found, she suddenly found herself face-to-face with Sabjorn’s employee, and a dagger pointed right at her throat.

[sapphicsimpblog]

So far I’m on season two, but already I’ve got a list of things I’d do if I owned the legal rights to OUAT.

In no particular order; this is that list:

1. Make SwanQueen canon.

2. Have Cora put her heart back in so she can be the mom that Regina deserves. (Definitely have Regina and Cora go to therapy though.)

3. Tf was all that Peter Pan/Neverland business. I get that that’s where we got Henry realizing Regina was actually trying to be a better person and that her past shouldn’t define her future, but like it was a dumb ark. So I’m getting rid of that.

4. In place of the Neverland ark, we’d see Regina and Emma exploring their relationship, Regina and Cora mending theirs, Henry would stop being a little shit. Maybe there’d be something silly and Emma and Regina would share TLK?

5. Snow and Regina would actively try to understand each other, Regina would explain what being married to the soggy raisin was like and snow would see that Regina wasn’t evil she was just hurting.

6. I’d get rid of Neal somehow, like I personally think that a 200+ year old getting a 17 year old pregnant is creepy. Even if he wasn’t in triple digits, he would’ve been around 27 if the show is to be believed and that’s still statutory r*pe in my opinion. Like yeah I get Henry needs to be born but maybe figure out a way to keep him from trying to win Emma back? Like he fucked up big time so, he’d definitely have to go.

7. Hook’s gay. No elaboration. He’s gay. Fight me.

8. Honestly the blue fairy meddled in so much and from what I’ve seen she’s 100% evil. So she’d definitely have to go.

9. Rumple and belle, I know a lot of people like this ship but tbh, it’s kinda icky. Like there’s definitely a Stockholm Syndrome type of thing going on. Idk. Maybe Rumple and Hook can get it on? Belle can be with Mulan.

10. The whole, “Regina’s soulmate has a lion tattoo.” thing? Weird but people change, so I’d explore that but with Tink admitting that people’s soulmates can change as the person evolves.

11. Emma’s tattoo would definitely be explained. Because we all deserved that story.

12. Zelena saw how Cora treated Regina when Rumple showed her Regina’s life so I’d say that she wouldn’t have held any resentment towards Regina. I honestly think the writers could’ve made a much better storyline for them.

13. Another thing, why’d they just send Ruby away? Like, she’s such a great character and they just tossed her aside. They could’ve come up with something better. Especially if she was gonna just pop back up at random times.

14. The Robin/Zelena thing also gave me the ick. So that’s out. That shouldn’t have even been a thing.

15. I liked the time travel thing but if I made Zelena and Regina have a better relationship then that wouldn’t have existed so I’d have to find another villain to make it happen. BLUE!! She’d totally do it.

16. Emma would totally fall through the portal, regina would follow her because “Ms. Swan when will you stop being an idiot?!”

17. Maybe rather than being thrown into one point in time we could see Emma and Regina navigate through different points in their life while trying to keep blue from messing things up?

18. I’d have liked to see a bit more of Henry exploring his role as author. Maybe he’d write the stories properly rather than having a biased story that portrays things as black and white. Idk, I’d just like to see the stories get written as they should have been rather than the way Issac (was that his name?) wrote them.

19. Snow and charming would definitely apologize to Maleficent for taking her child and forcing her to take on Emma’s darkness. Maybe I’d show Emma and Lily finding a spell or something to balance themselves so they wouldn’t be so messed up.

20. Dark Swan ark would definitely happen but it would totally be explored the way it should’ve been. It was the “Dark Swan” ark not the “Pity me Hook and Dark Swan” ark.

Honestly this is all I’ve got so far, if you guys want more I’ll definitely add more but I have to get further along in the show because currently this is all I can remember.

And if you have some things you’d like to add to this list, please do! I would love to see what you all think!

[faithlesbian]

how do we feel about t4t bangel ?

oh my god that's spooky i was literally just thinking about what it would look like for them both to talk about their bisexuality after that s3 dyke (proverbial) post!! let these two discuss their queer experiences night apparently

i'm assuming u mean trans girl buffy right? love that reading. i've gotta say, similar to the t4t spangel ask (im assuming ur the same anon), i'm not a "shipper" in the traditional sense and specifically in this instance part of my love for their dynamic is Really feeling glad they don't end up together. my opinions on them in general probably deserve their own post, so i'll just summarise and say my favourite iteration of their relationship is friendly exes who can go to eachother for help, specifically stuff like angel showing up after joyce's funeral and the offscreen reunion after her resurrection in s6. like. these people care about eachother!!! and they want to make life easier for eachother!! specifically i love it when buffy can lean on angel for support if she needs to despite their lives being fairly seperate, bc good god does she need that.

so assuming obviously that buffy would be living as a girl from the get go in this version, you could build a starting over as herself element into her moving to a new town and new school in the pilot. you could play with the supernatural-as-queerness subtext from the show and have the understanding of her slayer identity between her and angel that she doesn't feel from her normal friends extend to her being out to him before she's out to the scoobies, which could then extend further into the s2 angelus arc with the threat of him outing her, and potentially that being how the scoobies find out if you really want narrative cohesion with canon (or if you want to be nice to buffy then. literally anything else happening)

going with my established Trans Angel Reading, he'd only figure things out himself long after their relationship is over, and i think that could honestly be such a fucking Moment for them both, for him to confide this in her now after they've reached an understanding as she did in him right back at the start before everything went wrong. bittersweet but also kind of promising, like if it's possible to learn something new about yourself after 250 years then there's definitely still ways for their relationship to grow even if they cant be together. i feel like just as angel was able to help buffy navigate the world of the supernatural initially, she could help him navigate gender in the 21st century, and i think getting that understanding from her would be really important to him in a totally different way to getting it from the ats gang.

i think for buffy it could be a kind of closure for, once again, just how badly their relationship went to know that despite everything she was understood by the first person she loved, more than she even knew at the time. however, a beloved Buffy Trait of mine is how badly she reacts to people she sees as threatening to replace her in any way (see homecoming and kendra and faith's respective first episodes) so alternately you could get the much funnier response of hello?? that was my thing first?? how dare you?? which synchronises really well with the previous ask and the possibility for coming out to put an end to angel and spike's rivalry - it starts a whole new one with buffy!

[nehswritesstuffs]

Father Like Son, Mother Like Daughter, Parent Like Child - Part 4 of 4

This one ended up being even longer than the last, wtf... at least we’re done now lol

First chapter on [tumblr] - [FFN] - [AO3] 

Second chapter on [tumblr] - [FFN] - [AO3]

Prior chapter on [tumblr] - [FFN] - [AO3]

With the Straw Hats dispersed due to Bartholomew Kuma, it’s time for more than just them to brace for the incoming Age. [11,422 words; AU where Cora-san and Bell-mère raised their six kids in the East Blue and everyone is better-adjusted ]

Nojiko gasped as she saw the newspaper, headlines cementing some of her worst fears in quick succession.

STRAW HAT PIRATES ELIMINATED IN DRAMATIC SHOWDOWN

BACK FROM THE DEAD? “STRAW HAT” LUFFY LEADS PRISON REVOLT, DESTROYS IMPEL DOWN

WHITEBEARD, PORTGAS D. ACE DEAD IN EPIC WAR AT MARINEFORD

SIBLINGS? PIRATICAL CONNECTIONS BAFFLE NAVAL INTELLIGENCE

It appeared as though the past few days had been extremely eventful for family members not-her. She went through the articles and tried to figure out if her idiot seafaring siblings were all okay. There was nothing saying that the Heart Pirates weren’t alright, and if her sister’s idiot captain could survive being attacked by Kuma…

“I might just murder the lot of them,” she decided to no one in particular. “No note, no word, no nothing! Not even anything out of Mom and Dad! I’ll kill them!”

“Uhh… Miss Nojiko…?” She looked and saw her tweenaged hired help standing there, confusion on his face and a bushel of mikans in his hands. Oh yeah, that’s right: she had been working in the grove when the newspaper arrived. “Is everything okay…?”

“Maybe? Possibly? I don’t know…” She rolled up the paper and stuffed it in her apron pocket. “You got any siblings, Chabo?”

“No ma’am.”

“Good—they’re only reliable for causing trouble and running up your blood pressure.”

“Uhh… yes, ma’am… if you say so…”

He really hoped he was going to survive this shift.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The doors to Sengoku’s office were violently kicked open, causing the old man to jump in surprise at his desk. To his even bigger surprise, a woman he hadn’t seen in-person for nearly twenty years came barging in, pure fury on her face.

“What the fuck are you up to, Sengoku?!” she snapped. She completely ignored the goat bleating in confusion at her and stormed up to the desk, slamming her hands on the surface. “I’m waiting.”

“It’s been a long time, Captain Cocoyasi,” he stated. “Please clarify: what brings you from your hometown, into a secure government facility, past my guards, and into my office?”

“You put a child on the chopping block for something he could never control and tried to escape,” she hissed. “Your subordinates almost murdered my children. When is this going to end?!”

“You came all the way from the East to remind me of how terrible my job is? That’s what I have Garp for.”

“Both of you are fucking idiots and honestly deserve whatever this New Age deals you.” Bell-mère folded her arms across her chest and scowled at the man in front of her. The goat kept gently butting its head against her thigh—it wanted treats and pets and she wasn’t giving either.

“Was that really your daughter…?” Sengoku asked quietly. “The Straw Hat navigator?”

“Don’t play dumb with me; I know you meddled with her bounty.”

“He can’t do much for his grandchildren, Belle, but he can at least do that.”

Sengoku silently stood as he looked towards the office door, the new voice slightly deeper and rougher than he remembered. Cora stepped through into the room and he lingered by the door with his hands in his pockets.

“Ro… Rosinante…?”

“Yeah,” the younger man affirmed. “It’s me.”

Shakily, Sengoku rushed to Cora and enveloped him in a hug. Tears choked his words as he held the boy he raised, cursing their near-multiple decades apart, only to realize something…

…his boy wasn’t hugging back.

“How much blood is on your hands?”

The question cut through Sengoku swift and precise. He let go of Cora and allowed the man to step further into the office, enough to look out the window upon the training grounds below. Everything was a fucking mess—rebuilding could have become cost-prohibitive.

“All I’ve done is what I’ve had to,” Sengoku stated, making sure the door was closed. “I’ve never run from it.”

“My daughter declared war on you,” Cora said darkly. A chill overcame Sengoku and the older man suddenly felt very exposed. “She declared war as she went to raid Enies Lobby, to rescue her friend, who you have been hunting for twenty years. That woman is not old enough to have committed a crime punishable by bounty… not if it was committed two decades ago.”

“I did what I had to do,” Sengoku repeated. Something sinister bubbled just below the surface of his words; he knew what this was about. His tone set something ablaze in Cora, there was no more time for excuses.

“Children died because of you! Nations erased because of you!”

“Don’t you think you know the choices I had to make!” the older man snapped. “Unlike you, I never ran away!”

“Then what else didn’t you run away from?!” Cora spat. “If you didn’t run away from Ohara and making that poor girl’s life a living hell, then what else did you approve?! Did you give the orders to murder my daughters’ families in Oykot and eliminate those who protested?!”

“Rosinante!”

“Do I only have my sons because you pulled the trigger on Flevance?!”

“You are out of line! There was nothing else I could have done!”

“Stop lying to me! You killed them! You might not have been there, but it was your orders behind it! Admit it! Flevance is dead in part because of you!”

“Their own hubris was what did them in!”

“Hubris?! You want to blame this on hubris?! If anyone’s hubris is to blame it’s the Government’s! The nobility who fled with only a trace of Amber Lead in their blood and their pockets lined in money! My son’s parents were slaughtered while trying to cure what you ran away from! He would look at his sisters and cry, because all he could do was remember the one who died in his arms! Do you think those three possessed enough hubris to deserve to die from it?!”

“You were not there, Rosinante! You do not know the depths of these decisions!”

“Cora.” The fleet admiral looked at him, eyebrow raised. “My name is Cora.”

“Rosinante…”

“The man said his name is Cora,” Bell-mère said idly. She was half-leaning, half sitting on the desk, looking at the things that covered it. “One of our middle kids gave him that name, you know… though I doubt it was the one responsible for this.” She picked up a picture frame and examined the contents: her and her husband on their wedding day. “This looks like our other middle brat’s work. She’s a clever one—safest for the world she stays farmer.”

Silence settled over the office and the two men glared at one another.

“You want to throw everything away for some misguided kids?” Sengoku asked. “Kids that have been exposed to who knows how many lies since they left your home?”

“Compared to the lies I was fed?” Cora walked back to Sengoku, standing close enough to smell the man’s cologne. “Stay away from my children, do you hear me?”

“I’m the only thing keeping those kids from being hunted down like animals.”

“Wouldn’t that get in the way of Justice? You always did wear your guilt a little differently.” Neither man broke eye contact, the stare-down tense. “Belle, we’re leaving.”

“You sure? It’s kind of fun watching you.”

“Yeah, I’m sure.” He waited for Bell-mère to open the office door before taking a step back. “You know, I always felt sorry for Garp growing up. I guess it’s his son and surviving grandson I should pity.”

“You’re an adult, Rosinante. You should know that sometimes good choices don’t exist.”

“That’s why we change the game, to make the good choices anyhow.” Cora turned on his heel and left the office, Bell-mère flashing Sengoku her middle fingers before backing out into the corridor and following him.

“Yeah, you’re not getting an inheritance,” Bell-mère snarked as she and Cora navigated the base’s corridors, dodging people who were looking at them in all manner of confusion. A few even dropped the papers they were carrying in surprise, having been around long enough to remember them both.

Those days were gone now, and they were the only survivors.

“I should have done this earlier,” Cora admitted. They turned a corner and went down a flight of stairs, heading towards the entrance. He tripped over himself and began to fall, with Bell-mère catching him by the collar before he could take a proper tumble.

“Telling him off now compared to ten years ago wouldn’t’ve made a damn bit of difference,” she scoffed. Once they were off the staircase they immediately went outside, where the sun was so bright they nearly had to shield their eyes. “Take it for what it’s worth; he didn’t kick us out or try to arrest us.”

“Almost wish he had.”

“So that what? We can get high on the shit list too? This is all such a fucking mess.” They made their way over to the docks, only to find that there was a stranger sitting in their boat. It was a young woman, barely older than their eldest daughter, with large, round eyes and a casual air about her.

“We’re not a hire service—fuck off,” Cora said. The young woman did not move.

“Never thought you were, Corazón,” she said. “Apologies; do you prefer Donquixote Rosinante? Maybe Commander Donquixote?”

“Is this something meant to scare me? Because it’s not working.”

“Trying to scare either of you is counter-productive,” the stranger stated. “Cora, Bell-mère, my boss would like to have a word with you. He doesn’t want your pity—it’s something more valuable he wants to discuss.” She took a red envelope from her pocket and held it out, a casual smile on her lips.

An envelope with a dragon printed on it.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Luffy woke up with a gasp. His whole body felt weak and shook terribly. The air smelled funny and he felt like he wanted to vomit. He did do just that, in fact, rolling over and deciding that the contents of his stomach needed to be on the floor instead. Shifting to lay on his back again, he groaned in discomfort, though snapped to full awareness as something hit the pillow next to his head…

Correction: a sword stabbed the bit of pillow next to his head.

“Strawhat-ya,” Law growled. Luffy’s eyes went wide as he saw his fellow Supernova lording above him, murderous conviction oozing from his very being. He was straddling him, knees on either side of his waist as his hands held shakily onto the sword’s hilt, his own eyes glinting in something feral… something powerful… something vengeful. Somewhere nearby, he could hear Hancock being restrained by some others… huh… he was back on the girl island…?

“Oh, hi Torao,” the younger man smiled warily. “Were you the one who patched me up?”

“Where. Is. My. Sister?”

Luffy blinked, unsure how to respond.

“WHERE IS MY SISTER?!” Spit flew from his mouth and tears welled in his eyes. “WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU LET HAPPEN TO HER?!”

“Torao, I…”

“WHERE DID KUMA SEND HER?!”

“I DON’T KNOW!”

“Law, come on, he just woke up…”

“I don’t care, Penguin,” Law snarled. “All I want is our sister, safe.”

“Don’t you think that’s something I want too?!” Luffy snapped back. “Nami’s my navigator! I don’t want any other! I don’t want any other crew! I want them! I want… I want…!” It was Luffy’s turn to cry, as everything hit him at once. “I want my big brother back! I want Ace!” He curled into a ball underneath Law, who straightened in order to look at this boy—he was just a boy, wasn’t he—sob pathetically as he mourned not only his crew, but his family as well.

Fuck… maybe it was meant to shake out this way after all.

Standing up, Law pulled his sword from the bedding and sheathed it, stepping back from the distraught teen. He could feel his own older brothers’ hands on his shoulders and his breath hitched—it was something that Luffy was never going to feel again with Portgas and the rest of the crew gone, wasn’t it?

“He just lost everyone,” Shachi said lowly. “Give the kid some space.”

“Every speck of time helps, and he’s the only one with any answers,” Law replied. He watched as Hancock went to Luffy’s side and began fussing over him, pillowing his head in her lap and smoothing his hair. Jinbe and Granny Nyon both looked at one another awkwardly, not knowing how much of what was going on was necessarily… appropriate.

“Then maybe you need to make the answers for yourselves,” said a voice. The brothers looked over to see that Rayleigh had returned to the room, observing the scene meticulously. “Luffy didn’t mean for any of this to happen just as much as you did—in a lot of ways to him, Nami’s as much his sister as she is to you.”

“Ray-ya, I don’t know if you understand how much we need to see our sister again… how much I need to see her and know she’s safe.”

“Then I suggest you get going on training,” the old man said. “Two years is a long time, but once it’s over, then it won’t seem like any time at all. You’ll need to take care while the Age is shifting or you will get left behind. You don’t want that sassy ginger girl to be stronger than you when she gets back, do you?”

“That would defeat the purpose of being the protective older brothers,” Penguin said. His brothers all nodded quietly. It was then that Bepo returned with a few more of the Kuja, the only one of them seemingly allowed to go wherever he wished sans a guard with exception of Rayleigh. “Everyone ready to go?”

“Yeah—Ikkaku says it’s best we leave soon as possible, so that none of the Kuja get too curious about the Tang,” he said. Bepo noticed Luffy was now awake and shifted awkwardly. “Is everything alright?”

“We have work to do,” Law stated. He handed Bepo his nodachi and approached Luffy again, ignoring the glares he was getting from the Empress. Crouching down, he stared at his sister’s captain until he stopped crying long enough to look at him. “Monkey D. Luffy.”

“Yeah, Torao?”

“Now you also know what it’s like to lose a sibling too soon. Do not disappoint me.”

At that, Law stood and began walking towards the door. His brothers followed, only for them to stop at the sound of Luffy’s voice.

“I’m going to become stronger! And stronger! And stronger! And stronger!” the young captain claimed. “I’m never going to lose anyone ever again!” Law turned around and saw Luffy standing, hands clenched in anger.

“It stings, doesn’t it? Losing someone like that?”

“You don’t know what I’ve lost,” Luffy snapped. “Don’t pretend like you do.”

“Now we’re on the same page.” Law snapped up a Room and twitched his wrist, a pile of goop appearing in Hancock’s lap. “That should stave off the sinus headache that comes from that amount of crying; I’m holding you to it, Strawhat-ya.”

“TRAFALGAR!” Hancock raged, having realized what the goop was soaking into her skirt.

“Oh shit gotta go!” Shachi grimaced, pulling his middle brother along. The four scrambled to make their way out of the castle, with Law shambling them halfway to the docks once they were outside.

“You’re an idiot!” Penguin snapped. “I want to come back here! We want to come back here!”

“We’re literally some of the only men to have ever seen this place and lived!” Shachi added. “Doesn’t that honor mean anything to you?!”

“You two are just horny,” Law deadpanned. Both his older brothers stumbled mid-stride—what a low blow.

“Get them!” someone yelled over the square. “They dishonored the Empress! Don’t let them get away!”

“Shit, shit, shit, shit, SHIT!” Shachi cursed, all of them sprinting fast as they could now. Law caught sight of the Tang and threw up a Room, dropping him and his brothers on the deck.

“Prepare to dive!” he ordered. His crew all stared at him for half a second before hurriedly rushing below deck. Only when they were safely underwater could they breathe, with Bepo gently elbowing Shachi.

“I think you meant to say ‘snot, snot, snot, snot, snot’ back there.”

Okay… maybe it was a little funny.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Two years passed in uncomfortable ease.

The rains came, the sun shone, the mikan harvest needed picking.

Power shifted.

A fractured crew trained on their own, refusing to let distance drive a wedge in their hearts.

Others prepared in their own way, yearning for the day they could put plans into action.

Alive Only, the entire time.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Nami honestly felt great. It was better than she’d felt in a long time—two whole years, in fact—and she was beyond glad to be back with her crew.

“Look! It’s the Sunny!” Chopper gasped. He and Usopp hopped off the Bon Chari and ran the rest of the way to their ship, immediately getting drawn into something ridiculous by… oh, seas, was that Franky…?

“Nami! You look well!” The young woman looked at the sound of her name and saw Robin standing on the deck. A warm smile brightened her face, which quickly spread to Nami as well.

“Robin! It’s so good to see you!” She attempted to ignore the boys as she brought her shopping bags aboard. “You don’t know how much I’ve missed having someone sane around~!”

“This sounds like you’ve got plenty to share involving your time away,” Robin chuckled. She took a quick glance and saw that Usopp and Chopper were still occupied with Franky’s new modifications. “Why don’t we put our things away before the crew’s get even more hectic?”

“Ugh, you’re right.” See? This was why Nami liked Robin; despite the creepy predictions and weird sense of humor, she was absolutely the only other person on the ship with a brain. Most of the time.

Trudging up the stairs, Nami and Robin both brought their bags into their room. Nami put hers on her bed and began to go through them, putting her new things away. She got through a couple bags before she turned around and saw Robin, the other woman sitting calmly at the table, watching her.

“Is… anything the matter…?” she asked.

“I’m just glad to be back,” Robin said. “You’re my family—there’s been plenty to process over these past two years.”

“Yeah…?”

“Yeah.”

After letting out a long sigh, Robin stood and walked over to Nami, bringing the younger woman into a hug. They stayed like that for a while, both taking strength from the other after so long apart.

“Just remember: after all we’ve been through, I don’t doubt you for a moment,” Robin said. “You are better than what came before you.”

“Robin…? What is this about…?”

“I was in a position to do a bit of digging while we were separated,” the archaeologist admitted. “Nothing much, but it’s enough to where I know a bit more than everyone lets on.”

“Considering how you are normally, that’s a lot,” Nami replied. “I trust you; don’t play your hand unless it’s necessary. I think you’re the best at that out of all of us.”

“Then I shall,” Robin agreed. “Now, let’s see what the boys have going on before something disfiguring happens, hmm?”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Setting up shop on Punk Hazard really did seem like a good idea at the time, Law thought as he wandered the corridors, though with each passing moment, it felt as though something was closing in on him. He had so far been unable to access the experiments that Cesar was working on, not to mention the combination of Monet and Pugio keeping an extremely tight grip on him for people who otherwise couldn’t care less. The Marine seemed almost nonchalant about it, in fact; there was something about him that put the young Warlord on-edge, and he wasn’t entirely certain what. It nagged at the back of his brain, making him more jittery than usual, especially now that he was staring down even more Marines on the front doorstep.

“You’re not supposed to be here, Shichibukai,” Vice Admiral Smoker stated. He and Captain Tashigi had nearly a hesitant air about them, while the G-5 mooks behind them were very clearly itching for a fight.

The dichotomy was… odd.

“What can I say? This is my home now.”

“I have it under good authority that it isn’t,” Smoker replied. “Now stop the act and let us in—we’ve got to talk.”

“I don’t know what I could possibly have to talk to you about,” Law said. “Leave me alone; consider this my Kuraigana.”

“Don’t think you’re able to play tough guy with us,” Smoker spat. Tashigi was readying to prevent the conversation from coming to blows when noises began to filter out from inside. “What’s that?”

“Nothing.”

“Doesn’t sound like nothing.”

“Then you might need to get your ears checked, or does Marine insurance even cover that?”

Just then, the door on the other side of Law burst open, dozens of people piling out into the cold. Most of them were children of varying sizes—giant infants and toddlers alongside normal ones—as well as… shit… some Straw Hats… was she…?

The sight of his sister made his blood run cold.

“Law-nii…?!”

“Nami, you shouldn’t be here,” he scolded. Despite the warning, he nearly ran to her, bringing her into a tight hug as tears streamed down his face. Suddenly remembering their audience, he opened a Room and popped a coat off a Marine and onto her shoulders before stepping between her and the G-5 contingent.

“I thought you said no one was here,” Smoker deadpanned.

“This is a new development.”

“Anyhow; this makes things less troublesome.” Smoker looked at the others, narrowing his eyes critically. “Let’s get these kids inside! They shouldn’t be out in this weather!”

“…but we’re escaping!” one of the larger children insisted.

“We don’t know what you’re escaping from,” Tashigi said, “but we’re the good guys! We’re here to help, but we have to stay inside a little while longer so we can figure out what to do with you!” She then turned her attention back to her subordinates, who were all rightly very confused. “Come on—you heard the Vice Admiral! Get the kids back inside!”

Grumbling, the Marines all did as they were told, herding the children back inside. Law and the Straw Hats stood off to the side, the Surgeon of Death refusing to let go of his sister.

“Where in the hell did you all come from?” Law asked.

“We could ask the same, to be fair,” Franky mentioned. “Why are you here, Tra-bro?”

“Oi! Don’t lock us out!”

Just as the Marines were about to close the door, a large… alligator-centuar…? Yes, an alligator-centuar came skittering inside, with the remainder of the Straw Hats on his back.

“Hey guys! Look what we found!” Luffy cackled, holding up a pair of legs. Sanji held up a severed head, which seemed to sob in relief. “Oh, hey, you found the head! And Torao!”

“Strawhat-ya,” Law regarded flatly.

“Good; we’re missing no one,” Smoker said, coming over to the group. He stared at the torso-less body and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Was this your doing, Shichibukai?”

“Shichibukai?!” Nami gasped in horror. She began hitting Law on the shoulder, the too-long sleeves of her coat beating against him floppily. “Are?! You?! In?! Sane?!”

“Hey!” he grunted. “A lot has happened!”

“It still doesn’t change the fact you apparently cut a guy into three and spread the pieces,” Smoker said.

“He shouldn’t’ve been irritating,” Law shrugged. He watched as Luffy perched himself on Smoker’s shoulders—honest to goodness his sandals were on the man’s shoulders—and he raised an eyebrow. “You two sure are chummy.”

“It’s not mutual, I assure you,” Smoker grumbled. Tashigi saw what was going on and attempted to disengage Luffy, which only caused him to drape himself over Zoro’s shoulders instead, who barely seemed to register the extra weight.

“Smoker and Tashigi know Mom and Dad,” Nami said, keeping her eyes on the Marine officers. Law considered that, then nodded.

“So, then I trust that I can discuss freely with everyone here?”

“If you have a way to muffle sound, then that would help immensely,” Robin said, her attention more on the other Marines. Law put up a pair of Rooms, one just slightly bigger than the other. Smoker then added some of his smoke between them and it began to woosh around, creating a makeshift sound barrier. “Now then, what is it that you have to say?”

“I’m going to take down an Emperor,” Law said frankly, “and I’m going to do it in one of the most effective ways possible.” The others were quiet at the admission, waiting for him to elaborate.

“How do you propose that?” Usopp cringed. “We’re not talking small-fry here.”

“There’s a very specific pressure point that, if hit, can help take down at least Kaidou, maybe even destabilize enough to get Big Mom as well.”

“That sounds insane, Law-nii,” Nami frowned. “What ‘pressure point’ do you honestly think will be that effective at sabotaging a veteran pirate and pirating lord?”

Law stared directly into Nami’s eyes and took a deep breath. “Uncle Doffy.”

Nami’s jaw dropped as she realized what her brother was saying. Their uncle?! Was he insane?! Her crewmates noticed her shock and all glared at Law.

“We’ve never heard anything about you two having an uncle until now,” Luffy said. He was now on Franky’s shoulder, picking his own nose. “What’s all that about?”

“It’s a long story, but essentially,” Nami cringed, “we have the weirdest family and every even mildly weird family has a rich and eccentric uncle no one likes to talk about.”

“Ha!” Usopp couldn’t help but laugh awkwardly at that. “What, is he, like, a renegade Warlord or something?” Law and Nami both stared at him, which made the sniper shudder. “Oh no…”

“This is an issue,” Smoker stated. “We don’t have the authority to go after your uncle; from a Government standpoint, he is untouchable.”

“Well, then the rest of us can help take him down!” Luffy grinned. He draped one arm over Nami’s shoulders and the other over Law’s. “You can’t help who you’re related to sometimes, but that does mean it can be your business to stop them from doing bad stuff. Who is it?”

“Yeah!” Brook piped up. “We’ve all been so busy and bone-tired these past two years, we’ve rarely read the paper!”

“Whoever it is, Nami-swan, I’m sure we can help!”

“Really, Luffy, maybe I should go with my brothers once this is all done—wait, where are Bepo-nii and the goons?”

“Bepo is doing recon right now—I’m here to hit the flint and get sparks going.”

“Naaamiii, Toooraaaooo, who’s your uncle…?!”

“I just remembered,” Nami said briskly, “that I don’t think I ever told any of you my family name.”

“Isn’t it Trafalgar?” Chopper wondered. The rest of the Straw Hats were a mixture of curiosity, like Brook; confusion, like Zoro; intrigue, like Robin; and something close to fear out of Sanji.

“I’m not getting rid of my original family name,” Law explained. “My siblings—however—none of them had a family name before, so they technically have Dad’s.”

“Both of you are stalling,” Zoro scowled. Nami took a deep breath and exhaled… she could do this.

“My name is Donquixote Nami,” she grimaced, “and my uncle is the Shichibukai and current King of Dressrosa Donquixote Doflamingo, otherwise known to the black market and criminal underworld as Joker. He is my dad’s brother by blood as well as name.”

The Room went deathly quiet, everyone staring at Nami and Law until Luffy burst into laughter.

“Oh, is that all?” he chuckled. “I don’t like the sound of that guy anyhow. Let’s kick his ass!”

“He’s dumber than we thought, sir,” Tashigi marveled. Smoker simply facepalmed.

“It’s nice to hear you speak truthfully, Nami,” Robin smiled. She then glanced over her shoulder to see the children and the G-5 Marines getting on disturbingly well. “We still have some more pressing things to take care of, it seems.”

“The children being here is a big one,” Chopper noted. “They’re being experimented on! I don’t think that’s something that the World Government knows about.”

“Despite this being one of Vegapunk’s old facilities? I doubt,” Tashigi said. “This general area is known for child disappearances and deaths, though something tells me that by asking some of these kids question, we’re going to find plenty of answers.”

“We saw ships on our way in bearing the initials C.C.,” Smoker added. He looked at Law. “Is Cesar Clown here?”

“Along with a lab assistant named Monet possessing a Devil Fruit and a Marine vice admiral—”

“Pugio…?” Smoker and Tashigi both asked at once.

“Sounds like you weren’t here just to see me; I’m hurt,” Law joked flatly.

“Well, let’s get going,” Luffy grinned. “I’m hungry, and all our food is aboard the Sunny!”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

It was late that night as the Thousand Sunny sailed peacefully towards Dressrosa. Although there had been no sight of Vice Admiral Pugio despite his earlier presence, Monet had been quickly dispatched and Cesar Clown was unconscious and tied to the mast. Everyone had long finished dinner and had dispersed into their evening routines. Nami found her brother sulking by himself in the aquarium bar, his arm slung over the back of the bench as he rested his chin against it, staring into the tank.

“Hey.” He didn’t move. “So… there’s a lot to catch up on, isn’t there?”

“Not really.”

“We just spent two years without contact—before, it was only a few months at most.”

She sat down next to him and waited; there was only one true way to break through Law’s moody spells and that was patience. Eventually, he looked at her, bringing his arm down so that his head rested directly on the bench.

“I might have stolen Luffy from the Summit War and treated his injuries just so I could threaten him over your safety when he woke up,” he admitted.

“Okay… on-brand for you,” she chuckled. “I was on an artificial sky island called Weatheria learning about weather from these weird old men.”

“I stole the hearts of a hundred pirates to buy my way into the Shichibukai.”

“I was literally in possession of the only vagina on the island.” Law closed his eyes and smiled, trying poorly to not laugh. “What? You doubt me?”

“Exactly the opposite,” he smirked. He straightened in his seat and nodded as he looked at his sister in the wan aquarium light. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, dumbass.” She pulled her legs up, hugging them so she could rest her chin on her knees. “Bepo-nii’s really waiting for us in Dressrosa?”

“Yeah—he’s got the safehouse and an escape route all planned, on top of looking for the factory.”

“What about Peng-nii and Sach-nii?”

“They…” He trailed off, not knowing how to continue. “We… we fought… about a year ago now. I don’t know where they are.”

“What…?! What in the hell did you fight about?”

“They wanted to funnel information to Sengoku’s other son, saying it would be better to put military pressure on Uncle Doffy. I refused.”

“It was enough to break up over?”

“Yeah.” Law avoided eye contact, hoping it would help him keep his composure. “Our family is falling apart, Nami. Our older brothers are nowhere to be found, you were presumed dead for two years, no one’s heard hell or high water from Mom and Dad since they told off Dad’s dad—not even Nojiko’s gotten a letter from them…”

“Mom and Dad are missing?!”

“Yeah. I’ve been looking, but…” He shivered. “I don’t know if you, Nojiko, Bepo, and me are the only ones left. Up until today, I thought I only had one brother and one sister remaining.”

“Don’t say that.”

“I know from experience.”

“Law-nii, that was different. You are different.”

“I can’t remember my first family’s faces, you know.” It was quiet between them, only the aquarium making noise. “Every time I try to remember them, I think of our family instead. Mom and Dad… Nojiko… our brothers… it’s them I see… I try to think of my kid sister, but for some reason her hair is orange instead of brown…”

“Law-nii…”

“That’s why I have to do this,” he continued. “Uncle Doffy has fucked us up so irreparably that there’s nothing I can do except take him down. I can’t let him take the rest of you away… not when I’m so close.”

“If anyone should take him down, it’s Dad.”

“Yeah, except I was there when Dad had the chance—he almost died, Nami. Dad had him right there and couldn’t pull the trigger. He’s…” His voice grew quiet as he remembered that day. “…he’s not like him.”

“One’s a farmer and the other’s a criminal mastermind… it’s kind of obvious.” She leaned over and rested her head on his shoulder. “I wonder what kind of a man Grandpapa Homing was like, if he turned out both Dad and Uncle Doffy.”

“Dad said he was kind and loving; very open-hearted. Uncle Doffy said he was weak, pathetic, and foolish.” He paused, unsure of how to continue. “Hey… uh… Nami…?”

“…yeah…?”

“Can you… do that thing Mom used to do?”

“Yeah.”

She took her weight off him and allowed her brother to shift so that his head was in her lap. Her one hand gently carded through his hair while the other rested on his neck, her thumb rubbing soft circles against the nape. She hummed a soft tune—a bawdy sailor’s shanty that was more lullaby than anything when slow and wordless, and let him melt into her touch. His whole body seemed to relax as she continued, going through the entire song before stopping.

“What are we going to do now?” she asked, voice quiet.

“Use Cesar Clown as bait and get our uncle in a position where I can strike him down.”

“You don’t have to do it alone.”

Silence.

“Remember Law-nii… you’re not alone.”

He didn’t answer her, for he was already lost in thought. The ship wasn’t far out from Dressrosa anymore and he was ready to put his plan into action… even if it killed him.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Sitting in the Royal Palace, surrounded by a lavish display of opulence and might, Doflamingo read over a report given to him by a sentry toy, rushed in as he finished up breakfast. From the looks of things, it appeared that he was going to get a visitor soon… fufufu… how fortuitous…

“Mank, Fahkon,” he said, a grin upon his lips. Two of the guards stepped forward—one bald and the other peroxide-blond, both with their employer’s signature sunglasses as the rest of their unit—and saluted. “It appears as though my favorite nephew is finally coming home to take his rightful spot at my side whether he realizes it or not. I want you to initiate Protocol Corazón. Now.”

“Yes, sir!” the men replied before leaving. Doflamingo looked back at the report, examining the photograph that had been included. It was Law on Punk Hazard, a security camera having caught him with a protective arm around a woman… hmm… not just any woman, but the Straw Hat’s navigator…

Oh, he was going to have fun with this.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Everything was going relatively smoothly, considering all the working parts of the plan. Doflamingo had gone and resigned his spot from the Shichibukai, publicly giving up his position as a Warlord. He called Law’s bluff and agreed to meet him on Green Bit, where there would be a trade-off involving handing Cesar directly over to Doflamingo while—unbeknownst to Joker—some of the others destroyed the SMILE factory.

Well, it would be if some other people would stick to the plan.

“I’m going to need you three to hang back while I make the exchange,” Law said. He and the rest of the Cesar Hand-Over Team were walking through the streets, nearly at Primula. Nami quickly appeared at his side, an unamused expression on her face.

“I did not give up being in the relative safety of the Sunny just to watch you go in alone,” she frowned.

“Nose-ya, I trust that you can control my sister should something come up?”

“If you think I can control Nami, then you’re even more insane than I thought,” Usopp shuddered. Robin chuckled quietly from her spot next to Cesar.

“Our Nami is fiercely protective of her own—no doubt a trait she picked up from her elder siblings.”

“I can’t believe you lot are the ones I have to suffer through,” Cesar grumbled. “Of all the upstart little shits, it had to be these upstart little shits.”

“Don’t get too fussy now, or Doflamingo’s going to get his favorite science bitch back in a bit rougher of shape than intended,” Law warned.

“That’s not nice,” Nami mentioned.

“It’s accurate.”

“Doesn’t mean it’s still not nice.”

“Isn’t this the fountain?” Robin asked. The group stopped and looked at the center of the neighborhood square—there was indeed a fountain, topped with what looked like a dancing woman. They checked the map just to confirm—without a doubt.

“So this is where Bepo-nii was going to meet up with us?” Nami frowned. “It looks more like a place for someone to meet a date.”

“Doesn’t matter; he should be here by now,” Law scowled. He checked the clock on a nearby building, with Robin and Usopp silently noting how similar the siblings’ facial expressions were. “He had explicit instructions.”

“You know the fuzzball than I do, and even I know that’s a pretty hard sell,” Nami deadpanned. Law sighed—his sister was right. “He was to establish our routes and meet us here—it was supposed to be a no-brainer. Leave it to the most neurotic of our brothers to screw up a no-brainer.”

“I’m sure he does his best,” Robin chuckled. She then saw a nervous-looking bear looking around the square and smiled. “I think he might be more on-time than we think.”

Just then, the bear caught sight of the group and tried not to rush towards them. While the bear’s fur was brown, there was no mistaking the tears in his eyes.

“I can’t believe it’s you, Gingersnap!” the bear sobbed, picking up Nami in a tight hug.

“You look… different…” Usopp said.

“It’s a disguise—nothing permanent,” Bepo explained. “Everything’s clear to the Green Bit bridge. It’s dangerous, but I think we can handle it. When I realized who you were bringing along, I instantly felt better!”

“Where is the rest of your crew?” Robin wondered.

“Safe; Bepo dropped them off at a secure location before coming here,” Law said. “Now… let’s get to Green Bit so we can get this over with.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Once recovered from the shock, ugly tears and snot ran down Luffy’s face as he hugged Sabo for the first time in a long time. He hugged so tightly that it was clear he didn’t want to let go, which made his brother chuckle.

“Ay! Wudduh yuh think yer doin’?!” Bartolomeo snarled. “Mistah Luffy needs t’concentrate before goin’ back out!”

“I’m going to handle that,” Sabo said. Luffy looked at him in bewilderment.

“…but…!”

“You just concentrate on helping out your crew take down Doflamingo—some of my associates are already en route.” Luffy blinked and Sabo chuckled. “They’re headed to King’s Plateau as we speak.”

“Where have you been?!”

“I hit my head so hard that I forgot everything we’d been through until very recently,” he admitted. “Now get those things off so you can go and Lucy can keep Ace’s legacy alive.”

Nodding deeply, Luffy took off his Lucy disguise and handed it to Sabo, who hugged him once more, leaving a kiss on top his head as though they were still kids.

“Your punches still like pistols?”

“You know it!”

“Then you won’t have any problem kicking Doflamingo’s ass—get going!”

“Alright! Help my brother, okay Chicken Guy?!” Luffy ran off, laughing through his tears as Sabo and Bartolomeo stared at one another, one amused and the other completely flabbergasted.

Doflamingo was going to be in for it.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

In her defense, Nami had done everything according to plan. She stayed back along with Usopp and Robin before they disappeared. After that, she even stayed hidden while Law had a pissing match with Doflamingo and Fujitora. She had completely followed along in her brother’s harebrained scheme, which he had promised was going to go off without a hitch.

So why, pray tell, was she locked up in a dungeon?!

“I can’t believe I’ve been reduced to this,” she muttered as she paced the cell. It was a simple design—stone walls, seastone bars, bed, sink, bucket—and yet there was a very complicated feel to the entire situation. Much of the crew was still in Dressrosa, that much was true, and there was the fact that Law was still alive. Doflamingo was truly a sadist; there was no way he’d let Law do something as simple as die without torturing him first. Bepo was also wandering around, but he just watched her get kidnapped, Law get shot, and a Marine Admiral summon a meteor from the sky—he was certain to need time to compose himself.

An explosion went off outside the palace that made Nami jump. Was she going to be trapped while the others fought on? What if she tried to escape? Waited for the others to get to her? Ugh… she really should have stayed on the Sunny when she had the chance…

Just then, she noticed a string slinking along the floor, coming into her cell. It began to swirl around and form a shape, which eventually solidified into the very image of Doflamingo, who smirked at her.

“Well, this is something,” the string-copy stated. It seemed to regard her carefully, as though she represented part of a puzzle he was interested in solving. “I don’t exactly understand: why is the Straw Hat brat part of this? He doesn’t seem smart enough to go through Law’s plans.”

“That’s the thing about Luffy,” Nami said coolly. “He keeps people on their toes.”

“Allies included?”

“Especially allies.”

“Then maybe this might be to my advantage after all,” the string copy mused. It had only a moment to ponder before the door to the cell block creaked open, at which it unraveled and reformed in the corridor. “Ah, Mank, Fahkon, I take it Protocol Corazón is functioning as planned?”

“Well as it’s going to go, sir,” the bald man said. “Mank and I have everything under control.”

The string copy gave pause. “If that’s the case, then why are you here?”

“We have a bit of unfinished business with the woman,” the blond replied. “I hope that’s alright by you.”

“Fufufu, but of course.” The string copy turned its pointer finger into a key and opened Nami’s cell door. She swallowed hard—this was not looking good.

“Much obliged.” The bald man drew the sword at his hip and looked at Nami, smirking casually. “Good to see you too, Gingersnap.”

Nami gasped as she watched the bald man swing his sword and slice Doflamingo’s copy in half, the entire thing falling limp into a pile of shredded string. She was taken aback as the pair took off their sunglasses and tossed them to the floor, revealing their faces in earnest.

It was honestly enough to make her cry. Mostly in frustration, but she couldn’t help the joy that went along with it.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Bepo was, admittedly, absolutely terrified.

He had only just barely slipped away from Uncle Doffy’s grasp when the exchange went sour. There was no sight of his brother or sister, and the Straw Hats had taken Cesar back into their custody at Law’s bequest and got the hell out of there. Nothing was going true to the plan and now he was running around the palace, attempting to find what was, at this point, Plan Q or R or something like that.

The royal palace was strangely quiet, as much of the fighting was going on outside. He poked his head inside a bunch of different rooms as he wandered the corridors, seeing the opulence and grandeur that his adoptive uncle surrounded himself in. It was such a far cry from the mikan farm that it was honestly jarring, though it also underscored the differences between the man who raised him and the one whom they were fighting. He could not imagine his parents wanting to raise him and his siblings there… to him, the fact there were never any visits was proof enough.

Finally, Bepo came across the Hall of Suits, noting how hollow and dark it was. He nearly passed it right up, but saw someone slumped down in one of the chairs… oh, shit… the chair with a heart for a back.

“Law-nii!” Bepo gasped. He ran to his brother and immediately began panicking at the sight of all his injuries. “Is that a gunshot wound?!”

“Bep, I need you to find the keys to these seastone cuffs,” Law grimaced. “He shot me like he shot Dad on Minion Island—if I don’t get access to my Devil Fruit soon, I’ll bleed out.”

That tidbit sent the Mink into full sobs. “Damn it! I’m so sorry, Law-nii! There’s nothing on the walls here and I don’t know where to look!”

“Just, look in the other rooms!”

“I already did!”

“Well, look again!”

“I’m not leaving my remaining brother’s side!”

“What the fuck do you mean by that?!”

Bepo looked over to see Nami running into the Hall of Suits along with two men he didn’t readily recognize. As they got closer, he caught a whiff of them, his expression turning hopeful.

“Peng-nii?! Sach-nii?!”

“The ones and only,” Penguin said. He reached into his blond coif and pulled out a hairpin, which he began to use to pick at the cuff’s locks.

“Where the fuck did you two come from?” Law groaned. “You look fucking ridiculous.”

“We look like the guys who are currently saving your ass,” Shachi fired back. “As if we were going to let you just  get Fuzzball and Gingersnap in mortal peril without some backup! It’s completely irresponsible!”

“This was supposed to be little more than a suicide mission for me, that I was to complete alone,” Law said. The locks sprang open and the cuffs fell away. “If I succeeded, then great; if not, then only my life is on the line.” As he felt the Ope-Ope’s abilities come flooding back to him, nausea overcame him, leading to him leaning over the chair and vomiting sourly. He wiped his mouth with his coat sleeve and surrounded himself in a Room, attempting to patch himself up the best he could with the potential time allotted.

“Uh-huh, and you completely forgot that he’s our uncle too,” Nami scolded, tempted to use her Climatact to beat his thick skull until he got it. “We’re siblings—we can clean up our family mess together. We even have friends to help where we’d otherwise be stretched thin.”

“…but…!”

“No buts!” Nami leaned down and got in her brother’s face, poking him in the bit of chest not marred by a gunshot wound. “Don’t give me that shit! You might have been the only one of us to have lived with Uncle Doffy, but that doesn’t make you the only one responsible!”

“Yeah—we’re doing this together!” Penguin insisted. “What good are dumbass siblings if you can’t ask them for help?!”

“Or rope them into crazy-ass adventures?!” Shachi added.

“Fufufu… I can think of plenty.”

A chill settled over the siblings as someone new entered the hall. Doflamingo casually strolled in, his Haki oppressive as it beat down on the others.

“Stay away from him!” Penguin hissed. He brandished his staff while Shachi held a sword behind him. Nami and Bepo helped Law to his feet, his injuries thankfully subdued for the time being.

“Fufufu… look at my little nephews and niece,” Doflamingo chuckled. They all tensed at that. “I didn’t think nearly all of you would show up… Rosi certainly was… busy while away.”

“Don’t you dare talk about Dad that way, as if you didn’t try to kill him!” Law snapped. “If I hadn’t gotten there in time…! I…!”

“Yes, you certainly did change the course of events,” Doflamingo admitted. “Fahkon, Mank… the both of you? All this time? I’m impressed you were able to keep it together for this long. Did you plan on all of this before or after you joined my guard?”

“Fuck you,” Shachi spat. Doflamingo shrugged.

“No matter—Law, this is your last chance: you are the strongest of my brother’s brood, and I want you to do the smart thing and succeed him as the Corazón. You can do what he never could.”

“Why would I work for a piece of shit like you?”

“…because, I was hoping you were as sharp as I remember. Not a worry though—I have ways to make you see reason.” He lifted his hand and Law blanched.

“You guys need to get out of here,” he growled.

“We can’t leave you,” Penguin said. “We’ll take care of this jackass together.”

“No… I don’t think you understand,” Law replied, voice rising in panic. “All of you need to leave.”

“Which one, which one…” Doflamingo purred. He locked his sights on Nami and twitched his wrist so that his palm faced up, fingers still crooked. “You will do.”

In an instant, Nami’s shoulders jerked back, making her eyes go wide in panic. She tried to drop the Climatact, and couldn’t.

“Parasaito,” Doflamingo smirked. He watched as Nami’s body moved jaggedly before it settled into smoother motions, which made all his brother’s children panic.

“Try to hold still, Gingersnap,” Shachi said. “I might be able to cut the strings.”

“You can’t,” Law snapped. “There’s nothing to cut!”

“This has seastone in the steel—of course it can cut it!”

“Less bickering, more action!” Nami warned. She was beginning to spar with Penguin, who was just barely able to parry her blows without moving in to hurt her. “I don’t care how you do it as long as you don’t hurt me!”

Without a word, Bepo took the situation into his own claws and laid down atop Nami, putting just enough weight on her so that it was difficult for her to move or be moved. Doflamingo scowled as he attempted to pull on his niece’s strings, not getting anywhere.

“Well, that’s boring,” he hummed. “Maybe if I…”

Just then, glass shattered as someone burst through the window, Conqueror’s Haki at full-blast. Luffy took a swing at Doflamingo, raging at the Shichibukai. The siblings braced for an onslaught of broken glass, yet…

“Miss Nami! Youse guys! Ovah here!” They looked to see a barrier between them and the fighting, with Bartolomeo half in a door with his fingers crossed. “Let Mistah Luffy take care of it fer a while! Youse needs t’get yer strength back!” Not taking the opportunity for granted, they ran out of the Hall of Suits, Bepo carrying both Law and Nami.

“Who the hell are you?!” Law asked, attempting to completely ignore the fact he was hefted over his kid brother’s shoulder.

“Oh, I’m Bartolomeo, of the Barto Club! Mistah Luffy and the Straw Hats are mah heroes! There ain’t nevuh been a crew from the East good an’ bold as them! Not recently!”

“I told you we should have stopped back home for a bit,” Shachi snarked. Law pretended he didn’t hear him.

“I have’tuh admit, I didn’t think youse guys would be related to Miss Nami, bein’ Northern an’ all, but I’ve seen woise.”

“How could this be worse?” Penguin grimaced.

“Youse should see who dis oddah guy’s related to,” Bartolomeo chuckled. They rounded a bend and headed towards another corridor. “I mean, he an’ this dame show up with Mistah Luffy’s bruddah, and he says theys here to stop his brudduh from killings their kids! ‘Whose yer brudduh?’ I ask. Apparently, its the creep we’s just ran from! Uhhh… youse guys…?”

Bartolomeo watched as Penguin, Shachi, and Bepo all began to run faster, bursting into the hall ahead of him. They all froze as they saw the two people he had mentioned, casually standing over some freshly-defeated opponents.

“Mom…?” Shachi croaked.

“Dad…?” Penguin marveled. Bepo simply put down his other siblings, completely flabbergasted.

“Took you punks long enough,” Bell-mère smirked. She and Cora allowed their kids to run to them, giving them all tight hugs. “Been a bit—fuck, you’re all tall.”

“We hadn’t heard from you for so long!” Bepo sobbed. “What happened?! Did Uncle Doffy lock you up?!”

“I kind of told your grandfather off two years ago and since then we’re been Revolutionaries,” Cora explained. His kids all stared at him and he chuckled awkwardly.

“I, for one, want to know how you specifically haven’t died,” Nami snarked. “I don’t think you fixed being clumsy overnight.”

“Grauntie Tsuru really worked with me back in the day, okay?” Cora admitted.

“Now, how about we put off talking about Exploits Past for a bit so we can take care of this dry assfuck we call your uncle, eh kids?” Bell-mère asked, jabbing her thumb in the direction of the Hall of Suits. She looked at Bartolomeo, who was staring in slackjawed awe. “Oi, Barty.”

“Yes, Miss Bell-mère?”

“Time to earn your keep, kid. Go distract Mingo for us.”

“Anything fer you, ma’am!” Bartolomeo scuttled off, with Law and Nami groaning in unison soon as he was out of earshot.

“Where’d you pick this lunatic up?” she asked.

“That doesn’t matter,” Bell-mère said. “What does is that we have a plan to get the bastard right where we want him. He doesn’t know we’re here, which is a distinct advantage.”

Her kids all listened intently—with any luck, after this was done, Doflamingo’s existence was never going to hang over their heads ever again.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

When Law finally found where the fight had moved to, it was outside, under the harsh and blinding sun. As it was, it took a while for Bartolomeo to get Doflamingo away from Luffy long enough for Law to utilize the short window to cut in. Some razor strings had just bounced off a barrier the green-haired man put up when Law jumped into the fray, a large Room already up.

“Gamma Knife!” He was able to get a quick stab in Doflamingo’s side, causing the older man to cough up blood. Law quickly moved himself away from his uncle.

“Fuck…” Doflamingo hissed, clutching at his side. He glared at Law, teeth bared and temper wildly spinning out of control. “I took you in.”

“…to groom me into sacrificing my life for you,” Law replied. “You never cared about me past that. Cora-san is the one who cared.”

“Rosi was always soft, like Father,” the Warlord sneered. “I guess he would have been your grandfather, in a different world. Living with Rosi has turned you soft as him… all that time and energy I put into you… wasted.”

“Luffy… I need you to help Nami and our brothers fend off the lieutenants,” Law firmly requested.

“…but I want to help you kick this guy’s ass…”

“If he’s not done in fifteen minutes, then come back here, alright?”

“Not one second more, you hear?” Luffy insisted. He then followed the sound of a nearby explosion; Law and Doflamingo were now alone.

“Foolish move, boy,” Doflamingo stated flatly. “He’s got energy for days—you’re barely upright.”

“All I need is to get in one more shot,” Law chuckled. He watched as his uncle’s expression turn into a frown. “What…? Don’t like your odds?”

“I don’t like any of this,” he said. “You’re forcing my hand, making me kill my favorite nephew, for what? Guilt? Vengeance? Some twisted sense that you’ve decided to call morality? I should have killed you when I had the chance. Now be a good boy and die.”

At that, Doflamingo began to swipe at Law with strings, all near-misses as the younger man popped around the courtyard thanks to the Room. Each time he tried to get close, it was another attack of deadly string. Finally, Law landed another hit, twisting the Gamma Knife in Doflamingo’s side, only to collapse afterwards  in exhaustion. He watched in horror as his uncle remained standing—it was impossible…

“My strings can stitch me up inside as well as out, you arrogant brat,” Doflamingo snarled. He stepped towards Law, who was visibly trembling. “Now I can stomp you out for good.” He lifted his foot and aimed…

…only to be stopped by his own brother’s foot getting in the way.

“Rosi…”

“Name’s Cora; the son you were about to hit gave me that name,” he replied. “Then again, I don’t really think you’d understand things done out of love, would you?”

“Fufufu… aren’t we a little bold for our britches?” Doflamingo chuckled. The two men jumped apart, moving away from Law. “Nice try surprising me; I have to admit that when I heard rumors of you being alive, I thought it was too good to be true. Then your boys went to sea and it was easy to piece everything together.”

“What gave it away?”

“The Heart Pirates, Alive Only—that windbag Sengoku’s the only one able to manage that as a favor to such an obedient little pet who gave us away to Tsuru all that time. Though I do have to admit, the girl’s a surprise. Have her by that Belle you were always pining over?” He clucked his tongue at that. “You became a father so young… and to potentially abandon your daughter at such a fragile age…”

“Like you think Father abandoned us?”

“To the wretched, common wolves, despite the fact we were born in the heavens. They denied us our birthright, so it’s now my right to watch the world suffer and burn.”

“…which makes it my right to stop you.” Just then, Bepo came silently lumbering into the courtyard, crouching down by Law in order to pick him up. Doflamingo drew the gun from his waistband and pointed it at the Mink, only for Cora to point one at him.

“Let them go; your beef’s with me.”

“Oh… nostalgic,” Doflamingo replied, turning his gun towards Cora. The other man’s hand trembled, aim shaky as he took the sound dampening off his youngest son.

“Go,” he said, not looking away from his brother. When he didn’t hear Bepo move, he cocked the barrel of the pistol. “Go, now; that is an order!” Bepo squeaked and scooped Law up in his arms, running away fast as he could. They were soon gone, though there was another explosion and a shishishi to be heard off in the distance. Without aplomb, Doflamingo fired a shot that his brother took in the chest, sending him to his knees.

That was when Cora grinned.

“We need to stop finding ourselves in situations like this, brother,” Doflamingo chuckled. “I thought I demonstrated the first time: you can’t shoot me. You can’t kill me. You are too much like Father.” He frowned as his brother’s smile did not fade away. “Are you that willing to die? Are you that willing to follow in his footsteps?”

“You are right about one thing, Brother,” Cora laughed weakly. “I am too much like Father—I can’t kill you.”

Doflamingo allowed the corners of his mouth to twitch up. Cora was not done, however, despite his labored breathing.

“You didn’t take into consideration one thing though,” he continued. His brother raised an eyebrow.

“Oh? What’s that?”

“My wife is nothing like Mother.”

Inhaling sharply, Doflamingo spun around on his heel, only to be met by Bell-mère pointing a gun directly between his eyes. She pulled the trigger before he could react, killing him point-blank with a spray of blood and brains. His body crumpled on the ground, lifeless and limp, broken and grotesque.

That was when everything changed.

The Birdcage overhead instantly vanished, the citizens sobbing as they dropped their weapons. What was left of the Donquixote Family began to panic and flee, heading directly into traps set by the Marines still there. Dressrosa erupted into joy once again, as they knew that they were finally free to live again as they once had.

“Mom! Dad!” The five siblings, having won their own fights, ran over to their parents, where Bell-mère was helping Cora stand. Law immediately ran a Scan on both of them, finding that there was nothing immediately life-threatening. He then collapsed in Cora’s arms, his energy completely spent.

“We did it,” he breathed. Tears began to stream down his face. “Fuck… we did it…”

“We did,” Bell-mère smiled. She and Cora shared a quick kiss, which made their kids all groan. “Oi; you’re all adults, for fuck’s sake.”

Parents were gross.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Tsuru had a giant headache and it was suspiciously Sengoku-shaped. Because, really, what the fuck was he anymore? Friend? Colleague? Comrade? The guy who keeps showing up? The not-Garp? Nika help her if she knew…

“What does the Inspector General do anyhow?” she asked as they readied to make port. “All you seem to do is wander around and cause trouble for the rest of us.” He munched casually on a cracker, thoughtful.

“I inspect things… generally…”

“You weren’t even assigned to inspect the corpse I have to transport, were you?”

“Nope!”

Then again, how was Tsuru to know what Sengoku’s plan was? He slipped away while her unit was all enamored with the Tontatta princess, making his way through the ruins of Dressrosa until, finally, he found the small house in a field of flowers, where they were…

…where his family was.

Suppressing his Haki, he sat out of sight as he felt the raucous environment just out of his reach. There was presumably the owner of the house, as well as some of the Straw Hats, and… his son, daughter-in-law, and five of his grandchildren. He knew that if he had any chance of meeting them, now would be it… and yet… he knew it was not his place to intrude.

“Are you going to come in or are you just going to lurk there like some sort of weirdo?”

Sengoku looked and saw the Straw Hat’s swordsman leaning against the door frame. He regraded him critically, as though he was unsure of the old man’s true intentions.

“Do I have any right? After it all?”

“That’s not for me to decide,” the swordsman said. He watched as Sengoku stood and, after the man hesitated, turned his attention back inside. “Oi, Kyros, got another chair?”

The whole house went quiet as Sengoku lingered by the doorway. He saw Cora towards the end of the table, mid-reach for his fork, with Bell-mère sitting next to him. Aside from the Straw Hats (the Straw Hat himself, of course, being the only one to keep eating as though nothing was happening), the young people he had only seen in bounty posters were sat all around the couple, looking as though they had paused some sort of petty squabble for him to enter.

“Cora…” he choked, voice suddenly gone. “You… you did it…”

There was no response, with instead tears welling in Sengoku’s eyes.

“You were a better man than I ever could have hoped to be… Cora…”

“Gramps, who are you?”

Everyone looked at Luffy, slackjawed as he simply ate away. Nami and Shachi both hit him on the head, causing lumps to comically form.

“That’s the Marine Fleet Admiral, you idiot!” Nami snapped.

“Former Marine Fleet Admiral,” Sengoku gently corrected. “I’ve been out of that game for a while now.”

“Then why are you here?” Cora asked. The tension was palpable as they waited for Sengoku to make a move…

…though they did not expect him to go to his knees.

“I am here to apologize,” he said, showing every bit his age. “Your lives were all much worse due to my actions, whether I thought I was acting for the good of the world or not, and…” He leaned forward and pressed his hands and forehead to the floor, prostrating completely. “…there is nothing I can do, nothing I can sacrifice, to undo what I did… to fully atone for what I did…”

“Ooohhh… this is really weird…” Usopp shuddered. He looked at his crewmates and friends to see that they were all zeroed in on Sengoku. Well, shit.

“…and I want to thank you especially, Nico Robin, for not only living, but accepting my family despite my connection towards them. You are all so much better than this old, worn-out husk.”

They all stayed like that for a while, no one moving as Sengoku knelt on the floor, putting himself at their mercy. Eventually, Robin got up from her seat and went to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“I accepted Nami because she accepted me,” she explained. “She knew nothing of me and yet I was her friend. She knew everything of me and remained my friend. She knew very little of the extent of her grandfather’s actions and never let what she learned take away from what she built on her own. It’s easy to love someone like that, and just as difficult to hate.”

“R-Robin…” Nami wavered. The other woman pressed a finger to her lips with a smile.

“The sins of the father are not automatically the sins of the child, and despite this,” Robin told Sengoku, “your son has already bowed to me.”

Sengoku shuddered as he sucked in a breath, shame beating down upon him more than he ever thought imaginable. His tears fell directly onto the floor and the insides of his eyeglasses, only for a different pair of hands to touch his shoulder.

There was his boy, knelt next to him once again.

“Oi! Youse guys gotta get goin’!” Bartolomeo shouted as he burst in through the door. “Vice Admiral Tsuru’s been spotted talking to Issho! It could get bad!” He then noticed Sengoku, going completely pale. “Oh.. I… uh…”

“Shishishi—don’t worry, Chicken Guy,” Luffy smirked. “It’s just a family visit. Isn’t it nice that Nami is related to so many neat people? We’ve got so many extra-bonus-ally-friends that we even have them in the Marines!”

“…and to think that Sengoku isn’t the first one, either,” Kyros mused from his position in the corner. “You Straw Hats and Hearts certainly are an interesting group.”

Yeah… they’d take “interesting” any day.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

To stare down the world at sixteen and seventeen, it means you’re staring into a great abyss, unsure of what lies in store for you and yours. There is a certain form of both near-and-far-sightedness that plagues you, tricking the mind into finding substance amongst the wisps and whispers, far from what is actually lurking just out of reach. It’s an uneasy and frustrated feeling, yet one that needs weathering all the same.

To steel yourselves at sixteen and seventeen, it means making promises not meant to be kept and holding them to heart anyhow. It’s quiet letters and silent conversations; lying to others while staying open and honest in private, despite how much it hurts; counting down the days until you can see one another again, with each hour feeling like an eternity.

To be fully-vested soldiers at sixteen and seventeen, it means feeling a small part of you die every time you follow an order, knowing full-well that it could be worse. You could still be a cadet; you could still be a recruit; you could be demoted to chores; so little is justifiable, and yet, you keep going. Yes, sir. Right away, ma’am. You enable the machine that is slowly killing you, as it killed all your classmates’ souls… all your classmates but one…

To love someone else is dangerous, and you don’t know for whom until it’s too late.

[knxfesck]

Whos your favorite tf character and why

I legit just noticed that I had shit in my inbox (SORRY) but uhm. uhhhhhhhhhhh. hm. This might need a read more.

Out of the more "classic" characters I like starscream because 1) plane 2) villain. I think his character arcs in idw were pretty good overall and even though he's often used for comic relief (esp in g1) I like that he's a villain who doesn't know what he's doing all the time, who's desperate, who's kind of a mess, who keeps making bad decisions and who ultimately has to try and turn his life around himself, and its HARD and he shows that.

ANYWAYS he's not even my main favorite my main favorite character is Drift-formerly-Deadlock and I'm calling him that because I honestly find deadlock more interesting. I find I relate to him a lot in terms of how he sees and navigates the world, the anger that he tries to decide is righteous or not. His patterns of addiction, and especially his comittment to the decepticon cause. If this is what you decided was right and its falling apart what else do you do except go down with the ship? etc etc. Also the way he earns megatrons utmost trust but almost doesn't recognise it? like he's willing to leave whatever isn't working for him behind and megatron has this almost worshipping attachment (which is something I've experienced in relationships).

He's kind of on his own plane of reality and I like that that idea is taken further with his transition into being Drift and redemption. It gets a little muddy here because of Roberts' narrative plans for him that got scrapped but I am. A Huge fan of the whole Who do you have to be to redeem yourself? who are you redeeming yourself to and why? where is the line between the you that you are, the you that you want, and the you that you project so people will see you a certain way?? Can you get lost in becoming better? if you're lying to yourself and everyone else its just delusion right? How do you know you aren't lying if that's all you've ever known? thing.

Drift is so searching, he wants to find a way to make the world right and then he wants to find himself and that's a journey that will never end completely, no matter how agressive or determined he is about it. You finally put down the gun and you take up the sword, and you need to know what's stopping you from going back to bullets when shit gets tough, yk?

His design from drift: empire of stone is one of my favorite designs in tf (even though I'm biased towards deadlock and his fangs and lego block shoulders lol). The crossover part of my brain reaaally likes that he turns into a jdm racecar because. I like those a lot. Speaking of racecars I also find his relationship with rodimus really compelling because of their similarities and differences. I think it would be interesting to have a rodimus in my life. And ofc he's in a gay marriage with ratchet which is pretty cool even if it ascends him to fandom yaoi mischaracterization glory.

Overall I think my attachment to him is probably based more on other people's similar neurotices than on his comics even though I've read 95% of them (shoutout to @weapon-up-wallflower haha). Funnily enough I don't have any drift models or figures but I'm hoping to change that soon.

There are a lot of other characters that make the favorites list that I'd be able to tell you more about if I brushed up on my comic knowledge (cyclonus, sixshot, skywarp & TC, tarn, misfire, brainstorm, etc) but I think this is enough text.

But yeah, thank you for asking and triggering my long lost transformers brainrot :)

⬆️ the empire of stone design I was thinking of bc I'm not a huge fan of his mtmte bbl

and my favorite official art for deadlock

[sailoryooons]

you say I'm being nice, i say I'm being honest (I also say yes to your marriage proposal, no takebacksies)

as an engagement gift to us I thought I'd give you some book recs:

She Who Became the Sun, by Shelley Parker Chan

This book had me floored at certain parts where it navigates gender, sexuality, identity and purpose. I would be sat there feeling so captivated by the exploration of the MC's discovery of self that I knew it would stay high in favourites no matter what I would end up feeling about the plot lol. The good news is I like the plot too ahaha. I think it could be considered a slow burn for excitement levels, I know I recommended it to a friend who didn't read further than the first 1/4 bc it just didn't captivate them. It's the first physical book I bought and read after a long reading lapse, initially pulled in by the beautiful cover, fully intrigued by the author's explainer about where the book came from & very satisfied by my overall experience with it.

Iron Widow, by Xiran Jay Zhao

I basically read this book in two sittings and finished it immediately wanting to read the second (gotta wait a couple months yet). This book is interesting. The pose isn't particularly poetic or elaborate, and some things definitely feel over explained to the reader, however I think that tone adds to the attitude/charm of the book. The voice of the protagonist is incredibly refreshing and invigorating to become one with. I don't think many of the reveals/twists will sneak up on you, but I found that I didn't mind that I could see where most things were leading & just wanted to see MC follow their path. However there was one outcome that I was pleasantly surprised by that I've since seen the author openly talk about on their social media, so I wouldn't follow them until you've give it a read if you're interested. I'm excited to read the second book to see the MC find more of their power within themselves and take more power from the world around them.

Although both books very much have Chinese historical fiction as a genre in common, She Who Became the Sun is more historical fantasy whereas Iron Widow is more futuristic/historical sci-fi.

.. Those were all over the place reviews. yeehaw.

Also, I sent asks a couple weeks ago telling you that your words are that of a surprisingly good published author and I stand by it so hard. I find myself reading and thinking that your writing would be perfect on the printed page and honestly better than so much that's already out there and well acclaimed. I would eat dirt to see a fully fledged book of your fantasy worldbuilding.

I'm so excited for every fic you're gonna release this year. So excited.

Also also

on second thoughts it would probably more appropriate to say dark fae jimin will eat me (and I certainly won't be complaining)

OKAY SO I HAVE SHE WHO BECAME THE SUN ON MY BOOKSHELF! It's on my TBR list but I just started Wheel of Time so we will see how long that takes me. It is a solid 900 page per book so I will most likely read other things between each novel. I am so excited to read it, especially now. You have no idea.

I have read Iron Widow and I CANNOT WAIT UNTIL HEAVENLY TYRANT COMES OUT! I absolutely ADORE Xiran and that story made me look more into Chinese history and theology. I love that it is technically a retelling, in a way. I thought the lore of the crysalises and the dynamics between riders and the use of xi is so!!!! She is such a fantastic writer and I also really enjoy her as a person and her straight-forward approach to publishing.

THAT WAS YOU!?!?!!? WELL I am glad that we are now engaged. You get first dibs if I ever figure out how to publish a book bestie. Honestly, I just try to like... absorb all the big fantasy writers and apply it to my writing. I think the first time I ever realized I wanted to do writing was when I read Eragon in middle school. It's just. Such a masterpiece.

Fae Jimin will 100% eat you he is going to be kind of unhinged I am not sorry!

[rantsintechnicolor]

This morning’s argument; housing

There is no doubt that W knows more about living and surviving in this modern society than I do. 

She has stocks, understands retirement, can navigate healthcare, and insurance. She did those things before we met. Not sure if her parents sat down with her and guided her through it, but knowing them, it’s more likely she figured it out on her own. (I really wish my parents had sat down with me to explain a few things, but they hired a financial planner to help them, and they were never really very patient about explaining things like that, finding it more efficient to simply do it for me than take the time to help me understand.)

That’s not to say I’m a super dumbdumb about that type of thing. I can navigate the most bureaucratic bullshit for winery compliance, and I’m not afraid to pick up the phone to get the information, which W prefers not to do, often refuses to do. But with housing and real estate, W is so much more knowledgeable having done research for housing and following the trends in country, county and city closely for the last fifteen or so years. 

Last night, we heard that the four-apartment complex where we live, and have lived for over twenty years, was sold to an older couple from the Bay Area who have kids and grandkids in the area. They can’t make us move out unless they are moving in. And it seems likely, they would want to move their family in. Our apartment is the best. Laminate floors, a wine cellar that W built out of a closet, good backyard, deck, large closets. 

When we first heard it was up for sale, W freaked out. Our landlords told us it probably would be in escrow until September, so there was time to look and come up with a plan. She took it super hard right out of the gate, because she knows housing is a shit show. Real estate prices are unreal in California, and they have been ridiculous in the last twenty years especially, unless you count that short period after the Great Recession when houses were getting foreclosed and then trashed and people were getting them for a song, followed by an expensive dance to repair and rehabilitate. This is a college town with a lot of agriculture, some tech, and lots of retirees and family vacation homes. It’s a tourist destination and many homeowners have turned their second homes into AirBNBs to be able to afford their mortgage. 

(Let’s talk for a moment how AirBNBs are the worst. The rule in our city (and in many cities) for AirBNBs is that you can’t rent your whole house out on the service, only part of the house AND the owners have to live there. But if you go and look at the listings, you can see whole houses being rented anyway, blatantly breaking the rules (AirBNB doesn’t care, by the way, you can report all you want, but they won’t do anything. And the city? They don’t seem to care either because they probably don’t have a person there to enforce their own rules). The owners of these AirBNBs can’t afford the mortgage without using the service. Making that decision to buy a place they have to AirBNB (verb) fucks over all the people who work low wage jobs in this town, which is the majority of our population. The decisions those AirBNB homeowners made to buy a house with a mortgage they couldn’t afford was bad, because they have removed the ability for residents to have a long term rental and removing it from the market makes a scarcity of housing which inflates housing prices and rents further. And how greedy is it to own two homes when you just need one. And private family vacation homes that sit empty the majority of the year? Those people have removed those houses from the market as well, and shame on them. What’s wrong with a hotel? *steps down off milk crate*)

W is freaking out less today, because she has already thought about the options. Honestly, we were going to try to buy our complex but there is no way we could afford something over a million dollars. So, that option goes into the bin. Finding another rental will be tough if we and to stay close to work, have a yard, the same amount of space… not impossible, but our rent would increase significantly. We could retrofit a warehouse bay, but that would cost some money, too. And which is the best option? 

The point of contention comes up when W asks me what I want, where I want to live. This surprises and annoys me, because I feel like we have been talking about this for a while, and doesn’t she know? Yes. But she’s not sure if that’s really what I want. Don’t I have any opinions and goals? She has said this to me a number of times and it rankles.

Now, maybe she didn’t mean to make me sound like a shiftless, aimless, opinionless follower, but that’s kinda what it makes me sound like. (Perhaps, another interpretation of my lack of opinions and goals is a byproduct of having been together for over twenty years, where our goals and tastes have grown parallel to each other and are similar enough that I don’t have to voice them.) My goal has always been to live within our means, frugally, but not without a few comforts. So, is she asking me to dream? 

Her question also brings up a pattern I have adjusted to during the 21 years we have been together. When I have an idea, she would often tell me all the reasons it’s wrong and shoot it down (well, she has usually done more research so…). These days, she mostly shoots it down out of hand, and not gently, not kindly. So I rarely offer any ideas, goals, and plans because they are not heard, valued, or given much regard at all, and because I don’t like feeling stupid. I am a very flexible person, but I do stand up and veto if I know I can’t do certain things. 

I pointed this out to her. And she dismissed it out of hand.

So. I can’t expect that my partner will change to hear me and treat my contributions with more respect. I can either leave if I can’t handle it, or I can adjust.

The funny part about today is that she doesn’t have all the answers to what we should do, because while she did some research, but she didn’t actually crunch any numbers. So, the resolution is: we put together a spreadsheet and both add all our ideas to it, so it’s a very complete list of the possibilities. Well. That was my idea. But she didn’t actually respond to it.

And now she’s sitting on the toilet upstairs texting me all kinds of listings from Zillow…

[dashofmonsters]

Night Classes- Pt.3

Male Werewolf x Female Reader

You hear a late night infomercial as you pry your eyes open. You had fallen asleep while binging dramas, again. Your eyes flutter and shut tight as you stretch and feel something fluffy touch your hands. Suddenly you remember you're not alone. Bernard had been watching the dramas with you and somewhere along the line the both of you passed out.

Keeping your eyes closed you poke and prod your hands up to where a human face should be but feel a very wolf like ear as you stretch further. You try and get up and feel where his leg is which is also furry.

Oh no...

You start shaking him and calling his name as gently as possible while keep your eyes shut. He didn't want you seeing him like this but you got a pretty good feel for what he is. After a good minute he finally wakes and rubs his face, nearly jumping off the couch when he realizes he's fully shifted.

"I promise I didn't see anything! I swear... just calm down," you tell him, not needing eyes to know that he's a nervous wreck right now.

"You... I didn't... This is bad... this is bad... you really didn't see anything right?" he stutters.

"No but I felt that you probably were in full werewolf form so I kept my eyes closed. Is that alright?" you ask, moving up off the floor and blindly navigating to the couch.

Bernard flinches as you feel for his hand but calms down enough and gives yours a squeeze, "I uh... I think that should be fine. Thank you for not looking I guess..."

There's a strange tinge of disappointment in his tone but you decide not to read too much into it. If he wants you to look he should just say so...unless.

"Out of sheer curiosity why don't you want me to see you as you are? Is it some sort of cultural thing?" you ask.

"Yes and no... It's more of a... Well you see it's rather... Oh for fucks sake, it has to do with our mating traditions when we court someone who isn't a werewolf. Showing my full form to someone I court is sort of the last step, basically saying I trust you fully and then some...," he admits, his leg bouncing with nerves.

You had figured it was something important but you'd never imagine mating was it. Your face gets warm as intrusive thoughts invade your head but you're quick to shoo them away.

We are not going down pining road, nope not happening...

"If I'm being honest, I had to sort of stop myself a lot back then from attempting to court you... since I thought you were with Logan. I was kind of an idiot because I didn't even put two and two together since I never saw him make any moves at courting you. I think I was just a bit-" he pauses and groans, his leg bouncing even harder. "I was a bit jealous."

"Oh um well shoot..." is all you can spew out, still shocked at the umpteenth confession today.

"Yup," he sighs. "Well this was certainly a conversation I didn't think I'd be having and well I don't know about you but I am emotionally bushed."

The scale had been official tipped with this add on and honestly sleep sounds like the best equalizer for this issue. "I think I'm right there with ya. Oh shoot I didn't get a chance to switch the laundry!" You remember putting off tossing his clothes in the drier in favor of comfort.

Bernard quickly hops off the couch and scoops you up, "I can take care of that after I get you to your room. We both need some rest, you especially after a full day of me dumping my feelings on you."

You nod your head and he takes you to your room, where he somehow manages to once again trip and falls with you onto your bed.

"Either the universe is trying to say something or you're uncoordinated when nervous," you laugh.

He nuzzles his wolfish face next to yours, the fur tickling your cheek.

"I'm glad I got to meet you again, I really am. You've certainly changed since last I saw you but everything that I adore about you still stayed..." he takes a deep breath and groans. "Sorry I was about to do it again, the feels dump that is. I'm really bad at keeping these things to myself today."

You pat the back of his head and he gives a content sigh. For some reason you feel possessed to start giving him an ear scritch to which he melts at. He had been hovering over you until now, his body slowly lowering right next to you. "If you keep this up I might not want to leave your bed," he laughs. You pull your hand away realizing what you were doing was kind of weird even if Bernard was enjoying it.

"Well it is big enough for the both of us," you blurt, almost regretting what you just allowed out of your mouth.

Bernard is quiet and you think that possibly you've crossed a line until he boops you on the nose, "And what are you insinuating ma'am?"

"Nothing, just my bed is big enough for the both of us and that's it's more comfortable than the couch...so-"

"aren't you a bit afraid that I will...you know do something?" he asks, almost as if he asking himself as well.

You can't help but to laugh, "You don't even sound certain that you would. It'll be fine, I mean I did fall asleep on ya and I mean that literally. Plus you didn't try anything the first night you were here."

He sighs and you hear him sit up. You can't see what he's doing and it's kind of frustrating but you'll respect these boundaries.

"As much as I'd like to... I mean I really would, it's not a good idea. Being like this just means I've lost control... something I've had a shitty time with recently," he pushes himself off the bed and circles around to your side. "I know you'll have questions about this too but I think you have enough on your plate to deal with before I feels dump on you again."

Bernard nuzzles your face and tells you goodnight before shuffling out of the room. You finally open your eyes only to feel a sting at the corner of them. He's right that it's been a lot... more than you enough and yet it's not. Something in you ached when you heard the door behind him shut, like you were just rejected. You tell yourself you're being silly but it still hurt.

You went to sleep crying, not knowing why.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day came and Bernard was nearly back to normal save for his arms and legs. He had put his clothes on to dry after leaving your room and retrieved them before you awoke. You both check the weather and updates while you made French toast, again.

"It looks like they started draining last night, I should be able to go home today if not tomorrow. I just hope the power's on when I get back," he says, setting the syrup and mugs of tea on the table.

You want to tell him he's free to stay here if that's the case, just until the electricity is turned back on but you bite your cheek and hold it in.

We'll cross that bridge when and if we get there.

"That's uh good...hopefully no water damage," you flip the toast over and smile.

"I hope not, I'm on the second floor," he laughs.

Breakfast is quick and quiet with both of you keeping to safe topics such as work and school. Bernard tells you a few stories of his time when he was in college and how some of the people in his classes helped him navigate campus and deal with the jealous sorts that couldn't stand kids or young teens being that smart.

You share a couple stories too about how life was like after high school and how you and your sister found a place to stay while she got on her feet. He looks mortified when you tell him that neither of your parents want anything to do with your nieces or you and your sister for that matter.

"They focused on Joey after her and I got kicked out. I feel like even without her being pregnant though, they would have looked for some excuse to boot her and then I," you grimace.

"Why do you think that?" he asks, his voice soft and comforting as the memories of it all still sting.

"We weren't his kids... Our biological father went out for milk one day and never came back," you shrug. "Mom never said anything but she didn't have to, we knew she thought it was our fault he left her. She got married a year later and then Joey was born."

Bernard went quiet and stilled, he had been helping clean up after breakfast and decided to take up dish duty. His breathing is heavy and you see the muscles in his arm tense.

Is he mad?

You go over to him and put your hand on his back, the muscles there are just as tense. "Hey come on it's ok, her and I made it out just fine. We had plenty of people who helped us out, that does include your family you know."

It takes him a couple minutes to loosen up again and a lot of deep breathing. His body starts shifting again, getting furry instead of humany.

"Bernard, I think you're losing control again," you point to his arms and he quickly turns from you.

"I need some time alone... this isn't good," he mutters.

You decide to stay in your room for a little while then, giving him some pacing space. He says he'll knock on your door once he's calmed down enough and explain what's wrong with him. You can't help but to worry as you plop onto your bed and splay out.

At first you just scroll through the apps on your phone, playing a couple games and stuff then you got bored with that and decided to text your boss about when you'd be able to go back to work. Not for at least another couple of weeks...great.

It's been nearly two hours and you're starting to get really worried. Just as you're thinking about texting him to see if he's ok you hear a knock on the door.

"Can I come out now," you ask.

"Yes you may," a familiar woman's voice responds.

You practically leap out of your bed and open the door to see Bernard's mother, Tracy. You can't help but to hug her, it's been too long. She laughs and hugs you back.

"It's good to see you too. I see my son has been giving you a bit of a headache," she lifts your chin.

"No he hasn't! It's just that-"

"He's told me everything. You know what we are and you know about his feelings for you and that you've seen him almost go feral," she pats your head then grasps your shoulders.

She looks you dead in the eye and squeezes, "How much of him have you seen. I want to trust my son but I also know he tends to hide things from me. Please tell me."

"I've only ever seen his arms and legs, that's about it. I swear," you purse your lips and wonder if you should add that you felt him not being entirely human...

She lets out a relieved sigh and lets you go, "Good, good. At least he has some sense to do at least this part right."

You take a step back and try and process what's going on when you recall her mentioning something about him going feral.

"Mrs. Tracy when you say feral what exactly do you mean by that?" you ask.

She blinks a couple times and crosses her arms. She nods and shakes her head a bit as if she's having an internal conversation with herself.

"Now normally we wouldn't talk about this if you weren't a werewolf yourself or married into the pack but if Bernard trusts you at least this much I think it's safe for you to know, especially since you two seem close now," she grins knowingly.

Oh I swear to the universe if he told his mother we made out I'm going to kick him.

"Going feral happens for one of two reasons. Most common is when one's mate or territory is in danger or the mate has been gravely injured. Basically common sense and rationality goes out the door. That's why we stick to small communities and we tend to keep tabs on each other. No one has gone feral for that reason in quite some time in this neck of the woods," she explains.

"And the other reason I assume is what's going on with Bernard," you twiddle your fingers and thumbs.

She nods her head, "Yes and it's only getting worse. His is a more rare case and it pains me to see him this way. He's never really cared for being well, a werewolf. He's basically embarrassed of what he is! It hurts so much but I'm glad that you seem accepting of it, maybe that'll help."

Your jaw nearly drops to the floor hearing that. Bernard is ashamed of what he is? It doesn't make sense but maybe that's why he was absolutely mortified when you saw him the way he was the first night he was here and how relieved he looked when you didn't call the cops on him.

"Is that why you're here? Is he unable to calm down?" you look up to Tracy and she nods.

"Yes, both Daniel and I are here to get him. Berny seems a bit stressed that he can't gain control of his form like usual so we're here to sneak him out and take him to our home. Thank you for putting him up during the flooding."

Tracy gives you a quick rundown of the side effects of a feral werewolf with Bernard's case and it's not that comforting. Depending on where they are and who they're with, they'll get very territorial and over protective to the point of not letting anyone leave or come in. In your case though he might even attempt some outdated forms of courting which didn't sound too terrible but rejecting any of them could send him into a terrible depression.

After a while they finally leave and you're left alone with this strange feeling. It makes your stomach do a couple flips before you realize that you're about to be sick. You decide to chalk it up as stress as you step into scalding hot shower to clean off.

It's been a rough couple of days and you certainly have a lot to digest here. You have a lot of questions you need answers but the only one who can answer them is you. For starters how the hell are you feeling about all this?

Confused but ok? Yeah that seems about right...

Then how are you feeling about the Grahams being a family of werewolves?

That's fine, they're good people so what if they're werewolves?

How do you feel about Bernard being a werewolf?

Just like with the rest of his family, I'm fine with that.

Yes, but how do you feel about Bernard?

Your chest tightens and cheeks grow hot. You can't deny the fact that you're attracted to him but you feel like there's this wall between either of you that's preventing you from wanting to admit that you might be feeling something more.

Later after you cool down from the shower you power clean your apartment in an attempt to organize your thoughts. Some of your best thinking had been done in a fit of cleaning so you decide to give it a go. You get through the kitchen and livingroom feeling pretty good and more relaxed until you check your phone and see that you have several missed calls and texts.

There's a mix of calls and texts from Bernard, and as you read them...well attempt to read them you feel terrible. You wish you could help him with whatever he's going through but you feel as if you don't have that right, you hardly know him outside of being your best friend's brother and your creative writing teacher.

You decide to look through the texts that Tracy sent you, apologizing that she forgot to take his phone away from him and all the gibberish he sent along with the oodles of calls.

You really didn't expect anything like this to happen since you're nowhere near him and you start to wonder just how bad his condition really is.

Setting your phone back down with the screen facing the table you decide to ignore all this until you're done cleaning. Hours pass and you pretend everything is fine, that this is ok and Tracy and Daniel know what they're doing.

A hot mug of tea and watching a few episodes of Truly Yours put you at enough ease to where you felt comfortable enough to pick up your phone and take a looksee.

Tracy is calling and you quickly answer the phone, "Yes hello? Is everything ok?"

"He's gone, we can't find him anywhere!" she yells, her voice frantic.

Your heart stops at hearing that then nearly jumps right out of you when you hear a loud knock on your door.

"Mrs. Tracy... I don't mean to make this worse but I think he's here... what should I-"

"Let him in! Hush Daniel I know what I'm doing! If anyone sees him- No I haven't lost it!" Tracy snaps at her husband as the knocking keeps on.

The grip you have on your phone loosens and you nearly drop it when the scratching and clawing starts. He's trying to get in and the last thing you want to explain to your landlord is claw marks on your door.

"I'm going to let him in, but what should I do after that? I... I... have to go, he's going to break down the door at this point," you hang up before Tracy can put her last two cents in.

He keeps clawing and pawing at the door, the sound getting more frantic the closer you get. "Alright alright, I'm going to open the door but you have to calm down."

You give it a second and you hear him shuffle back. His breathing his heavy enough to hear through brick and wood. You unlock and open the door but decide last minute to keep you eyes closed. Almost instantly you feel him nuzzling against you and nudging you away from the doorway.

"Hey now, you're going to close that right? You might be feral right now but I know you still know your manners," you click you tongue and you hear a whimper and then your door shuts. It's reassuring to know that deep down he still has access to some common sense, his case might not be as bad as his parents think just different.

Bernard rubs his wolfish face against yours and as nice as it feels you have to push him away. "Ok big guy if you're going to be here while you're like this we got to set some ground rules. Rule number one, I'm keeping my eyes closed so you're going to have to help me out here. Rule number two, you're not allowed to court me while you're like this and..."

You feel and hear him drop to the floor and curl around you, butting his head against your legs and whining. You can't help but to roll your eyes.

"And this is exactly why you're not allowed to, you're acting like a big baby Berny," you laugh.

He makes a howling talking noise like that you've heard from the videos with the huskies talking back to each other. It's cute and funny.

"Rule number three, you have to get a hold of yourself. You can't be grading my shitty sci fi story if you're being a big baby." you sigh and he hugs your legs. "Come on now, get off the floor and help me to the livingroom. I have to call your mom and let her know everything's fine."

Bernard lets out a gruff sound but eventually lifts himself up and takes you to the requested room. He helps you onto the couch and then curls up right next to you, his giant head falling onto you lap. You feel around for your phone before Bernard realizes that you're looking for it and hands it to you.

You look up to the ceiling and bring the phone up to look at so you can dial for Tracy. She quickly answers and you get her up to speed. She's relieved to know that you let him and even more so that you seem to have things under control. Daniel hollers loud enough for you to hear that he'll be by later with some clothes since Berny will be buck naked when he finally shifts back.

The heat in your cheeks rises as your mind tries to conjure up an image of a naked Bernard.

Bad brain, bad! We've talked about this!

After the phone call you just sit there with Berny, giving his scritches to his heart's content. You try to shift a little, your legs uncomfortable being still for so long but he thinks you're trying to get up and wraps his arms around your waist.

"You're being a big baby again Berny," you tease him.

He lets go of you at hearing that and sits up with a pout.

"I don't know why you're so ashamed of being a werewolf and it's really none of my business since we're still getting to know each other again but it's a part of you and if you expect to trust someone with knowing this much about you, maybe you need to trust yourself with it too. You're not scary if that's what you're worried about," you pat his arm and you feel the tension melt.

Bernard inches back to you and you feel his clawed hands cup your face. He huffs something and makes a couple of gruff noises before forming something almost coherent.

"ThRa nK yoooooo," he grumbles.

Hearing him speak is a good sign you think, he must be getting some control back. You have him lay back down but he decides that if he's going to be cuddling next to you he might as well pass the time doing something you like and he turns the TV back on.

You spend a couple episodes just listening to Runaway Lovers before Daniel shows up with the clothes. Bernard takes you to the door and you hear him stagger back when something hits him.

"There's your clothes Berny! Do you realize how much of a headache this is for your mother and I? How much of a headache you're causing for her who... Your eyes are closed? Have you kept them-"

"Shut the entire time? Yes. He hasn't been that much of a headache, just a big baby," you shrug.

Bernard gruffs something that sounds like a protest and his father laughs, "Well this is certainly different... Usually when he goes feral you can't even talk to or reason with him."

Daniel makes a few humming noises before tapping his foot. "Well whatever is going on I need to file a report unfortunately. Every time one of us goes feral the family has to do a follow up and send it to the pack's doctor. Don't be surprised if you get a phone call in a few days."

You want to ask more about this report thing but you feel like you're going to get your answers eventually and let it slide. Daniel excuses himself and makes a few choice comments to Berny who you're fairly certain has his tail between his legs.

As the door shuts you let out a long and very exasperated sigh, "Well today has been very eventful!"

"Shhh ah Reeeee," he spits, though not meaning to.

"It's a lot, but I'm not upset... just tired. Can you take me to my room and shut all the lights off?" you ask him.

He quickly scoops you up and takes you to your room where that evil evil invisible rope trips him again and he lands on top of you. Unlike the last couple of times he's worried if he might have hurt you and seems frantic. "Hey it's ok Berny, I'm fine," you reassure him.

Bernard presses his forehead against yours and you feel him breathing heavily. His emotions seem a bit out of control but he's trying, you can tell. He's trying so hard to get back in control.

After a few minutes of him holding you he finally gets up and starts leaving the room. He pauses just short of your bed and you hear him feeling around on the floor. He must be baffled after tripping so many times.

As you requested he turns off all the lights and the TV and returns to the edge of your bed, waiting for you. If you sent him to the couch he'd be up all night and possibly would pop in ever so often to check on you, he would not sleep well and neither would you.

"Alright alright get up here big guy," you pat the other side of the bed and he practically leaps over you to get to it.

The bed rocks and creaks at the sudden weight and you can't help but to giggle. This is ridiculous! Your childhood friend's brother who has a crush on you and is your creative writing professor is a werewolf and he's cuddling you like his life depends on it!

Bernard pulls you up against him and your face is met with a very furry chest. He's radiating warmth and his fur is so soft you can't help but to feel at ease. Before you know it you're drifting off to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you wake up the next day you're surprised that you're the only one in bed. You're fairly certain you went to sleep next to-

"Ah you're finally awake," you look towards the doorway and see a very human looking Bernard.

"Morning?" you raise your brow.

He shakes his head, "More like afternoon. I did try to wake you a couple times but you were fast asleep. Can't blame you for being that exhausted after what I put you through yesterday."

All you can manage is a quick nod and a few blinks. Bernard gives you a nervous smile saying he'll be right back with some tea since you still look a little disoriented.

You skootch to the edge of your bed and rub the sleep out of your eyes as you piece together the last couple of very eventful days. This was the most excitement you've had in years and it was coming at you all at once!

The questions you asked yourself come back again and again you still feel the same. You don't know why but you want to know more about Bernard but it seems difficult if he can't even accept part of himself that he's supposed to trust someone with...

Bernard knocks before letting himself in with a hot cup of tea and the smell of bacon cooking. "How are you doing?" he asks, handing the tea off to you as he kneels down next to you.

"I... I'm figuring that out," you stutter.

"Fair... I understand if you'll need some time away from class and from me to figure this all out...," he reaches out for your hand but quickly pulls it back.

You look down into your cup of tea, the steam rising and the scent of spices wafts in your face. It's nice and helps clear your head a little.

"Why do you hate being a werewolf?" you ask, still looking at your tea.

Clearly taken back by your blunt question, Bernard falls onto his ass. You look at him finally and his eyes are wide and his mouth is pursed tightly.

"Your mom told me and I don't know if you remember what I said last night but I don't think you have anything to be ashamed of. You're not scary, not to me at least. In fact you were acting like a bi- mmMmmph?"

Bernard's hands are cupping your face as his lips kiss yours something fierce. It's hot and deep and you nearly drop your tea from shock. When he finally parts from your lips he looks content and then mortified.

"I. AM. SO. SORRY." he staggers back and grips the side of his head.

You snort laugh, "Well I'm not, that was nice."

He groans and smacks his forehead, "Laps in emotional control, I'll try to keep it under wraps... And to answer your question from before," he pauses and takes a deep breath. "I uh... I wasn't... I don't really hate it, I just don't like the idea of... well of scaring you. Ever since I met you I started tampering that side of me down but it only caused trouble for everyone around me when I started going feral."

You had a feeling that that was probably one of the reasons but not the entirety! The fact hits you like a brick wall during a hurricane and this time you do drop your tea. The hot liquid splashes you but you don't feel it. Bernard realizing what he said and how it sounds quickly pulls you into his arms.

"No no no! This isn't your fault! I promise, please don't blame yourself. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions and in doing so it's only caused a bunch or problems. Please don't cry... please," he holds you tightly and the tears just spill out.

Everything you've been feeling just spilled out with the tears and the whimpering. You grip his shirt for balance and to feel something other than whatever this feeling is. He bends down and picks you up and instead of taking you to your bed he just holds you. You cry your eyes out for what feels like forever, sniffling the last bit as the exhaustion takes over and you pass out.

You're on the couch with your favorite throw blanket covering you when you wake up again. It takes you a minute to even want to sit up, your face feeling puffy and all. You remember bawling your eyes out after that last revelation and just letting it all out. It was a good cry and very much needed.

Sitting up you suddenly hear Bernard in the other room talking. He's in the kitchen so you just peer up and see him pacing back and forth as he talks to whom you can only assume is his mother. He quickly halts after seeing you out of the corner of his eye and you wave to him with a smile. The look of relief on his face makes your heart race for some reason. He hangs up the phone and makes his way over to you.

"Hey," he smiles at you and then looks away.

Ah, we're right back to doing that again.

"Hey yourself," you sigh, leaning back into the couch.

Bernard's makes a couple faces and his cheeks flush as he glances back at you. It's making you very nervous to the point that you're about to get up and pinch him if he doesn't say anything soon.

"How are you... well you passed out and I- I uh uhm... You're not upset at... and I..." Bernard continues to babble as he tries so pick out what he wants to say. You push yourself off the couch to go and pinch him hoping that doing so will shock him back to reality. Instead you grab a fist full of his shirt and tug him down into a kiss.

He is surprised to say the least but then gets into it when you wrap your arms around his neck. Bernard pulls you up and your legs circle around his hips. You lose yourself to this moment and to him. His lips kissing yours as if he's been waiting to do this again and never stop. He backs you up against the wall, parting from your lips just long enough for you to catch your breath.

"Just kissing and the clothes stay on?" he asks, his breath hot against you.

You nod your head and his lips are on yours again. His hands cup your face, fingers caressing your skin so gently as his tongue finds yours. You moan at the sensation and grip your legs tighter around him. Bernard growls low in his throat and that does things to you, things you'll file away to sort out later.

His kisses grow more and more desperate and you find yourself grinding against him after a while. He's panting and calling your name between hot and heavy breaths like he enjoys the sound of it. Then things get real, his mouth moves to your neck and your grip on him gets even tighter as he sucks and licks at the sensitive skin. Ripples of pleasure shoot down your body making you realize you're at the end of being able to handle anymore of this make out session before thing get very X rated.

"Hey... I... I don't think I can... we should stop," you tap his arm and he lifts his head up. His amber eyes look into yours with this heaviness that makes you want to fall back onto his lips. He then looks at your neck and he smiles.

"Did you give me more hickies?" you laugh.

He laughs and starts to put you down, "I can't believe that that just happened, again!"

You finally pinch him, "You're infuriating when you ramble on, I had to do something to get you talking right."

"So you had to kiss me?" he raises a brow though he looks a bit smug.

"I was going to pinch you but apparently you looked kissable right then and I'm a woman of action," you shrug.

"You are a woman of many feats and talents that is for sure," he takes your hand and kisses it. You roll your eyes and pinch his cheek.

"Not to be a kill joy but we do need to talk, about you being a werewolf and all and how uh this is going to work mkay?" you say.

Bernard nods and keeping your hand in his he takes you back over to the couch.

"First off," you sigh. "I need you to get it out of your head that being a werewolf is embarrassing or that I find you scary and shit. I don't, so please stop going feral."

"I'll try... if well... if you'll..." his face goes flush and his eyes are darting. You decide maybe to give him a bit of an incentive.

You give him a quick kiss and he nearly melts, "Use your words Berny."

"Ok, I'll try to stop going feral. If you'll..." he clears his throat and takes your hands in his. "If you'll allow me to court you, properly and slowly of course."

Your brain goes blank for a moment and your breath gets caught somewhere in your chest.

"I uh-" you both blurt. He quickly holds up his hand and continues.

"I know that asking you this now seems well, odd, but I feel like if I didn't at least ask I'd still be the same coward who keeps everything to himself," he squeezes your hands and gives you a hopeful yet nervous smile.

You're still quietly processing that he did in fact just ask if he could court.

Nervously Bernard coughs, "And I mean even if you do say no to um what I just asked I'd still try and stop the whole feral thing. I know it's not easy to deal with and I don't want to burden you with my problems."

You start tapping your thumbs against his hands, face heating up as he keeps talking.

"Please say something, a yes or even a no... maybe you need some time to think about it or-" he stops talking when you squeeze his hands.

You'd been asking yourself a lot of questions on how you feel about all this and each answer you keep getting is that you're fine with it, stressed for sure, but somehow you really don't mind. You like Bernard and you're very very attracted to him. But there's this wall you keep seeing in your head and now you know why it's there and it terrifies you. It's not about him, but you.

For the longest time you felt not quite good enough. You were kicked out of the house along with your sister when you were in highschool. You never went to college and settled for job you're barely surviving with. You've always felt uncomfortable in your own skin though you pretend to have this unwavering confidence. You're actually a lot more nerve racked about almost everything but you keep cool and try to be the adult you think you ought to be. You haven't been honest with yourself just like Bernard, so maybe you're doing a bit of projecting.

"Why me?" you ask, your voice barely a whisper.

The room seems to still as does your own beating heart. He reaches a hand up, his knuckles brushing gently against your cheek and you melt at his touch.

"Because it's always been you. Ever since we were teens, even when there were years I didn't see you, in my class, and now here. It will always be you and only you," he takes a deep breath and gets closer.

You nod your head and you feel a tear slip from the corner of your eye. "Ok," is all you're able to say.

"Ok? Ok you'll let me court you or Ok you un-" you nod your head quickly before he continues, unable to form real words with how choked up you are.

Bernard leans in and kisses you, not hot and heavy but gently and with so much passion. It's slow and reassuring and the tears come on.

"I keep making you cry a lot today, I'll have to break that habit," he grimaces.

You give him a soft smile and shake your head, "I'll be fine, I just... crying helps me deal with stuff sometimes. It's weird and I've been like this for a while. I'm a sensitive soul as my sister puts it."

"You are weird but if it helps then I don't think there's anything odd about it as long as it's not hurting you," he kisses your forehead.

He's the first one to think so aside from your childhood therapist. It was basically an anxiety attack, though not as bad as they used to be. Your mom and your brother's dad used to say it was for attention and that you were wasting their money so they took you out of therapy after three sessions.

Bernard pulls you into his lap, slowly as if testing his limits and you let him. He holds you and rubs circles against your back. "Did you have anything else you want to talk about?"

"Yes...but I can't remember what it was. Your courting question threw me off," you give a breathy laugh.

"I would normally apologize but I'm far too happy right now," he gives you a squeeze.

"So you stop being a gentleman just because you're over the moon?" you look up at him.

"Only this once," he kisses your cheek.

You feel oddly content right now except there's something that seemingly bothers you and you can't understand why. You go through everything that has happened until now until your stomach starts to protest.

"Oh were you cooking something this morning?" you ask.

Bernard chuckles and nods, "I was in the middle of making breakfast when I came to check on you. I had just finished the bacon but well things happened so I just set them aside."

"Did you go shopping while I was asleep," you don't recall having any bacon in the fridge.

"I did, a friend of mine who lives not too far from here owns a small grocery shop. His shop lost power so everything was on sale just to get it out before it went bad. He called me and several others for first dibs," he tells you.

You're pretty sure you know the shop he's talking about and the owner, he inherited it from his dad.

"If you're hungry I can make us some BLTs and warm up some soup," he offers.

You nod your head and then start laughing, "Oh gods that reminds me of-"

"No no no! We're not going there! Yes I know Bernard, Logan, and Thomas, the BLT brothers. Stop it! I will drop you," he groans and pushes you back onto the couch while you're still laughing.

He makes lunch and brings it to the livingroom and you both get into a few episodes of daytime drama. Bernard keeps commenting on how either good or bad the plot is or how unrealistic the development is. You've never had anyone else to watch these shows with much less criticize them. It was fun.

After that you and Bernard talked, really really talked. You decided that if this was going to work, if you were going to let him court you, that the both of you had to understand each other's fears. He opened up almost instantly and it took you back a bit but it made it easy to talk about yours. When you talk about yourself he's shocked and a bit hurt that you've been bottling up so much.

You tell him all that's been bothering, all that's been haunting you, and all your self doubts. He listens and not once does he make you feel lesser for having these feelings. It gets to be too much so he changes the subject, no questions asked. He talks about work and you tell him it'll be a couple weeks before you're able to return to the office.

He sighs and tells you he wishes he was so lucky, the college asking all staff unaffected by the storm to show up at the start of next week.

"To be honest I'd rather just be here with you until I have to go back but I know you probably want some time to yourself to sort out things or go see your sister or do whatever it is you never have the time to do because of work," he admits.

You'd honestly like that too, but would that come off as being desperate? You're not sure... In fact there's a lot of things you're not sure of and you're not sure what's ok to talk about. You don't want things to be weird just when you said it's ok for him to court you...

Hold on a second... Wait just a damn minute... What does that even translate to?!?

"Uh maybe we can do that but at least give me tomorrow. I do need to sort some things out and all and you probably need to go and check on your own apartment and get a change of clothes and what not," you agree.

He gives you a very excited look and you're pretty sure if he was in his other form his tail would be wagging. "Sounds like a plan!"

That night you both cook dinner together and Bernard shows you how to make homemade pasta. His mom loves to make food from scratch and thinks it's an important for the family to help out. You remember you and your sister helping out on several occasions with the family dinners, it made you happy.

You both eat dinner in your room and stream some shows on your laptop, a little sick of watching dramas. You're both careful pasta nor thee sauce cares how good your manners are and stains happen and noodles fall into interesting places.

Bernard volunteers to do this dishes while you get the counters and put the leftovers up and boy are there a lot of leftovers. You almost forgot that he grew up learning to cook for a small army. By the time cleaning is done you're both tired. You invite him to sleep with you in your bed again.

"Once again I'm going to ask, are you sure?" he asks.

"Yes, it would feel kind of weird to banish you to the couch. Besides I feel like I need cuddles tonight," you cross your arms and you hear him laugh.

He picks you up, something that he seems to like to do, and takes you to your room. He stops right before getting close to your bed and he glares at the ground.

"Worried you might trip over nothing again?" you ask him.

"Honestly yes. The first time I thought it was my nerves, second time I swear I kicked something, and the third time I was pretty sure it was me going crazy," he sighs.

Bernard carefully feels his way towards the bed, shuffling his feet in hopes of not tripping but it still happens.

"Son of-!" he laughs as he catches himself before falling completely on you. "I think your room is haunted and the ghost here thinks this is hilarious."

"Could be," you giggle and sit up just enough to kiss him.

You fall asleep in his arms and you feel him shift partway through the night, it's just his arms and legs and part of his chest. You turn on your side just in case and you like the idea of being the little spoon.

When you wake up you find that he's been awake for a bit and had gone grocery shopping again and had decided to fix your door knob and lock situation. You kiss him, very long and very hard to the point where things get a little handsy.

"You really didn't have to but I appreciate it more than you know," you grin.

Bernard blushes and rubs the back of his head, "No, I really did have to... I kind of broke it this morning. That and it was bothering me."

He shows you the full fridge and pantry and that he's put all the dishes up and that he's made breakfast and tidied up the livingroom and this and that.

You feel almost overwhelmed by all that he's done it almost makes you feel guilty with how happy you are. Was this just him being a good house guest or was this part of the courting? You'd find out today after he leaves.

You had secretly texted Tracy last night and told her what had happened. At first you thought she'd be confused but she was excited and very willing to answer your questions, in person of course.

After breakfast, Bernard helped clean up before getting a ride home. You had offered to take him but he felt that if you did he'd try and convince you to spend the day with him at his place.

Once he was gone and the apartment quiet you decided it was now or never.

"Hey Tracy, yeah he just left. Where do you want to meet up?"

<Previous Pt.2 Pt.4>

[cinnamonest]

Y’all are too nice to me I swear… here I am being horny and nasty on main and I’m getting encouraged, damn. But for real  ( ´ ω ` ) thank you so much!!

I’m gaining more confidence to post more smutty stuff and the kind of dark shit I like, so I might go back and make more nasty Childe content later on too… After Albedo, I got Razor and Zhongli coming up, and a few ones I just worked on for fun. But yeah, just in case it wasn’t clear for anyone who followed me, I’m going to be writing almost entirely dark content and some really nasty stuff, so just be aware of that, and don’t consume my writing if that’s something that may be harmful to you.

Albedo is so pretty… and such good dark content material… He treats you like a science experiment but has the audacity to make it hot smh

I haven’t seen a whole lot of him outside the cutscenes, so potentially ooc (as if yandere content isn’t already ooc, lmao)

Albedo - Yandere Profile

tw: general yandere content, obsessive behavior, stalking

tw (below cut): smut, noncon (seriously, you’ve been warned)

What are they generally like? Lucid, aware? Obsessive? How do they behave?

Very much aware. In the beginning, it frustrates him. He’s never been particularly attached to anyone, outside of his former instructor. He’s always enjoyed being out on his own, spending extended amounts of time by himself – the desire to be around someone is a foreign feeling for him. He immediately notices how bizarre the emotion is for him, how it changes his behaviors. His self awareness combined with perceptiveness makes him able to acutely recognize not only how unusual this emotion is for him, but also how the extent of his feelings, the types of desires they ignite in him, is unusual even for “normal” people who aren’t social recluses.

He’s frustrated by his own actions, feels embarrassed at how attached he is to you, how easily you make him flustered and trip over his words. As he is a very aware yandere, he’s definitely afraid of rejection to some degree. He has no idea how to navigate feelings and interactions with other people, he’s never really had the desire to form a particularly strong bond with anyone before. As such, he’ll come across as very awkward, and he will interact with you less than most yanderes – he knows he’s just going to embarrass himself if he talks to you, right? He’ll just mess up and say something strange, so instead, he opts to watch you from the shadows, go to places where you are, but keep a distance from you, just being able to watch you makes him feel fluttery and overwhelmed. 

He will definitely be one to collect things from you. He collects plenty of things for the sake of science, this is no different. Or so he tries to tell himself, but he can’t delude himself even if he tries. He knows its weird, he knows its wrong, but the overwhelming urge to have things of yours is too great to resist. He’ll start off with more innocent things, but it will gradually progress to not-so-innocent… items of yours.

It may not be obvious, but he’s actually a fairly sensitive person, at least regarding you. He places a lot of value in what you think of him, and wants to ensure you’ll respond positively to him. He views it like a science – there should be some formula by which he can put in the correct actions, and produce a specific result. Unfortunately, unlike real science, there’s not much room for trial and error – he feels he only has once chance.

How likely are they to kidnap their darling? How quickly will they do so?

It will take some time, as he’s got to get over his own nerves first. He’s torn between the fear of you hating him for such a thing, it would be the end of the world for him, but also the desire to pull you away from the world, to keep you hidden from others, to have you all to himself, to be the only person that gets to look at you. If you start showing positive signs, reacting positively to his gifts, expressing interest in conversation with him and going out of your way to see him, he’ll start to get more confident, think that he can afford to do something that might sour your opinion of him, hoping it will merely be temporary.

He’ll probably start to do so several times and back out. He’ll set out at night, make it all the way to your room and stand over your sleeping form, and he’ll start to worry, wonder if someone saw him, see holes in his plans, he gets too nervous and bolts. He’ll persuade you into being alone with him, and although its the chance he’s looking for, again, he’ll get nervous, worry about being caught, run through all the what-ifs, and miss the chance. Honestly, when he does finally take you, it will probably be not planned, but in the heat of the moment, a rash decision from desperation. Something like you coming to visit him to tell him you’re leaving the area, came to say goodbye, and he’ll panic, ultimately grabbing you by the arm as you try to leave and dragging you back inside, silently, but forcefully.

How difficult is it to escape from them? How do they keep you restrained? How do they deal with attempted escape?

Moderately difficult. Your best bet is to take advantage of his tendency to be absent minded when he’s absorbed in his work. He gets very lost in his thoughts, to a point where he’ll completely zone out and be oblivious to the world around him. On the downside, this means you won’t have much time to cover distance, he’ll be close behind the moment he realizes you’re gone.

The route he’ll probably take is actually one where you won’t need to be too restrained, because you’ll be taking… a little research trip. Out to the most freezing, desolate areas of the mountains. He’s convinced the knights he needs to stay there for his research, but in reality, he’s internally panicking, as he tries to figure out how to make this work – after all, you two can’t stay here forever. You’d be foolish to run out of the little cabin he’s bought, out into the perilous freezing cold and jagged, high slopes. At first, he thinks there’s no way you’d try it, so he’s content letting you have free reign to walk around as you please. If he has to leave for whatever reason, he’ll probably lock you into a single room, but he won’t chain you up, as again, he's really trying to avoid making you hate him.

If you prove to be determined to leave, he’ll be hurt, but mostly concerned for you. He’s actually not one to get too mad over an escape attempt – he’ll blame himself, or theorize it’s just a natural response your brain triggered. Against his first choice, he’ll end up having to get more strict with your restraints. If you get too whiny, though… you might trigger one of his more frustrated moments.

“I didn’t want to have to do this… I’m sorry. I can’t risk anything bad happening to you. Tell me if it’s too tight… I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t blame you. I know you’re probably panicking over all this, but you’ll get adjusted to it, I promise. Just… just give it some time… it’s not so bad, living with me, I promise.”

“Don’t be like that. You’re only tied up because you tried to leave. You should understand why you have to be kept like this… If you don’t want to be restrained, you shouldn’t have run out, trying to get yourself killed.”

How easy are they to trick, deceive, or manipulate?

For all his academic intelligence, he’s not highly skilled with people and socialization. He’s not too good at being able to tell when he’s being lied to, and he definitely won’t pick up on subtle manipulation. It’ll be pretty easy to wrap him around your finger, he’ll do what he can to make you happy.

Once he finds out you’ve lied to him, though, he’ll get pretty upset. He likely won’t trust you again, and will require proof of anything you say, or set out to find out if you’re telling him the truth or not.

How lenient are they? What privileges can you have, and what will you be denied?

He’ll try to accommodate you, giving you things you ask for, but he has limits. He’s too paranoid to let you have any contact with the outside world. You do have him wrapped around your finger to an extent, though. Whatever he’s doing at the moment, he’ll drop it in a heartbeat if you want to spend time with him in any way, even if its just you asking for food or to take a walk. He’ll be willing to take you for very short trips outside, no further than a few yards from the lodging, if only because he knows sunlight is vital to your health.

What kind of rules do they have? What kind of punishment would they use?

The basics will be there – don’t try to leave, don’t be difficult with him, try to cooperate, be obedient. However, he’s also particularly overprotective of anything that can hurt you – even yourself. Under no circumstances can you handle anything that can hurt you – that means no cooking, no knives, no lifting anything heavy, no going outside without him. If you’re determined to cook something, he’ll have to stand right behind you, and watch while you do it. If you get so much as a little cut or burn, he’ll take over, insisting you go sit down after he tends to your “wounds.”

At the very beginning, he’ll be hesitant to punish you too much, as part of his plan to get you to like him. However, he can be a little easily frustrated, and your safety and well-being comes first, even if it means he has to make you upset. He will have to restrain you, take away what little privileges you had. If you try to bolt while you’re outside, no more going outside. If you try something foolish like attacking him with a knife when he gives you cooking privileges, you will lose said privileges. Really, the worst part of it all is the humiliation, being treated like a dumb, incapable baby that can’t do anything for yourself. He insists on doing everything for you, even down to bathing you and dressing you, even feeding you if you can’t convince him to take restraints off your hands. He’ll talk down to you in that way, too, talking to you as if you were a child.

How do they deal with rivals, or perceived rivals? Will they get rid of them? Will they kill them themselves, or find another way?

It’s a situation he’s not prepared to handle, and he’s unsure of what to do. It strikes fear in him that you might have someone else interested, so he has to get rid of them as quickly as possible. He’s not opposed to killing, if it comes down to that, but initially, he’ll try to work behind the scenes – expose something that will ruin their reputation, get them accused of a crime. This would also be one of the possible aforementioned situations that might cause him to kidnap you a bit earlier than he normally would, as well. If he can’t get rid of them easily, he’ll just take you away from them.

He will absolutely try to make you hate them, try to ruin your image of them, and he’s rather good at falsifying evidence for his claims of their behavior. With his alchemic skills, that sort of thing is easily possible.

How easy is it to make them mad? What does their anger look like?

He gets more frustrated than anything, when you’re being difficult. This is mostly just him sighing quite a bit, speaking a bit harshly, even pouting and sulking a bit if you’ve offended him. But true anger in him is not pretty, and almost never happens. It’s a buildup, a slow rise that has a boiling point. If he reaches that point, he can definitely get mad enough to hurt you, it’s actually kind of terrifying in how sharp of a contrast it is to how he normally is. It’s a side of him that’s very difficult to draw out. He’s not one to yell or shout, no, his anger is a suffocating silence, he slams down whatever he’s holding as he stomps over to you, grabbing you by the arms hard enough to bruise, and dragging you by the hair to whatever he has planned.

With mild frustration outbursts, he will feel justified, but if it reaches that intense anger, he’ll usually give at least a little apology, tell you he didn’t mean to go that far. He hates to think of you fearing him, but ultimately, if that’s what’s necessary to keep you safe, then he can live with it.

Do they see you as above them, beneath them, or equal to them?

It’s an odd mix. On one hand, he sees you as utterly fascinating, the most beautiful thing he’s ever laid eyes on, more than any landscape or art he’s seen or made, an invaluable treasure to be kept on a high pedestal. Simultaneously, however, he will treat you like a child, thinks you can’t do anything for yourself. It’s a bizarre duality, but one he is consistent on. You’re precious, so very precious, and he’s undeserving of you, but at the same time, you need him to be safe and sound.

How determined are they for you to love them? How hard will they try to make it happen? Or are they content just having you?

Of the genshin boys, he’s one of the most determined. He’s not good with people, and he doesn’t really have anyone particularly close to him left anymore. He tends to keep people at a distance. You sort of fill an space inside him that he never knew was empty, a void he wasn’t aware he had until it was consumed by thoughts of you. He doesn’t need anyone or anything else, so long as he has you with him, but he really, really wants it to be true that you love him. He doesn’t need you to even love him as much as he loves you – he doesn’t even know if that’s possible – but he just wants to know that, even if only in the slightest, his feelings are returned. He’s so distant from everyone else, but you wormed your way into his heart, even if you didn’t intend to, with your smiles and softness and kindness towards him. For the first time, he feels weak around someone, but in a way, it’s a good feeling. He wants to be able to be vulnerable, be weak, and not have anything to fear by doing so.

He’s lucid, though, so he doesn’t expect you to love him immediately. As he’s not good with words or displays of affection, he’ll get you all sorts of gifts. Rare items that you wonder how the hell he obtained them, beautifully crafted little trinkets from all his searching and time traveling, more clothes than you could ever wear. You’ll start to feel a little guilty, it’s so much, and you’re certain he doesn’t have that much money. He’ll blow it off, say it’s no big deal, but if you insist, he’ll have to start finding new ways to convey his affection. In captivity, he won’t stop trying, but he’ll understand why you might be angry. In that case, he will utilize what he’s learned from research in books he’s read. He knows that eventually, with him being the only one you have, the only company, the only one to talk to, the only source of touch, you’ll eventually have to cave. You’ll become attached to him, bond with him, whether you like it or not. He knows how powerful the affect of touch can be, and will make sure to hold you in his arms, keep you on his lap, make you crave the only source of human touch you can get. Dependency, he thinks, is the gateway to you loving him.

Bonus: Is there anything that makes them unique, in comparison to other yanderes?

Drawings. So many of them. Much like his drawings he uses in notes, he’s found he tends to start scribbling a familiar face when his mind drifts off. He’s memorized every little detail of your face, every curve on your body. If you’re ever snooping around, you’ll eventually uncover a book of sketches he has solely dedicated to drawings of you. Drawings of you laughing, smiling, sleeping, drawings that you’re certain were of real events you were at, that you didn’t remember him being at. Every bit in perfect detail. If you confront him about it, he’ll be horrifically embarrassed, insisting they’re no good, or, if you’re upset, trying to reassure you it was all from his mind and totally not him lurking in the shadows as he watches you.

Also, if you want to make him happy, get him on one of his spiels about his work, his interests, anything that he can catch onto and go on and on about. He’ll catch himself rambling and apologize for being “annoying,” but if you reassure him, and express interest, that will make him feel particularly appreciated. It would be a primary way to get on his good side and manipulate him, or lull him into false security to make your escape, if that’s what you’re looking to do. But be warned, it will only work once, and he’ll be far too hurt to let himself indulge in sharing these things with you again.

General perverseness: how sexual of a person are they? What’s their drive like? How touchy do they get? Do they have any reservations about sexuality?

Publicly, definitely highly reserved. He’s easily flustered, and thinks of sex in a very scientific way, for the purpose of procreation. For fun? He knows it’s enjoyable, but can’t separate it from his very analytic, scientific way of viewing things. It’s a formula, you touch this here and pull that there, and the result is supposed to be orgasmic bliss. He just isn’t very familiar with pleasure – he doesn’t drag out masturbation, even, as that would be a waste of time. He gets it over with quickly, taking short breaks during his work. He is a fairly high drive, though, and gets the urge fairly frequently, about once or twice a day.

He’ll be hornier with your presence, having to leave more frequently to get off to the little things you do, quickly getting himself off while recalling the mental image of you holding a pen in your mouth, the little moan when you stretch, the way your clothes fit to your frame.

Prior to abduction, he’s not particularly touchy at all, in fact, he’s very jumpy if you touch him. Once he’s gotten you alone with him for the foreseeable future, isolated, dependent, he’ll gain more confidence, be willing to give into his cravings to touch you, hold you, eventually progressing to groping you, moving his hands up and down your body, under your clothes, slowly peeling them off.

He’s initially a bit ashamed of his urges towards you, feels guilty every time he gets off to you, but will likewise gain more confidence once you're his.

A guy can only fight off the urge for so long before he cracks, before he can’t continue to care about the consequences. For him, that point is when he knows he finally has you all to himself – his worries fade, and while the guilt is still there, it’s far outweighed by desire.

How forceful are they? Do they care about your willingness?

He does care, but as stated previously, it’s hard to fight the urge for so long. It will be torture, but for the first few days, he wants you to “adjust” to your new “home,” and not add to your panic. After that, though, he’ll try to assess your reactions. If you’re extremely resistant, he’ll give you more “adjustment” time. He can’t really hold off forever, though, and eventually, maybe a few weeks in, comes to the conclusion that if he just does what he wants, so long as he’s gentle and reminds you he loves you, it will help you get past the mental barrier in your mind. He’s convinced there’s simply a psychological issue, and that sometimes, people need a push. It’s like having a friend who can’t swim – sometimes, you just have to throw them into the water, help them get over that mental hurdle, and they’ll be grateful in the end. That’s what he tells himself to justify it, anyway. He has enough… anatomical prerequisite knowledge to know what’s good and what’s bad, and will take your body’s positive reactions as a sign of what you really want. Is definitely the kind to use that against you, holding up his fingers to your face after you cum on them, as if to prove a point.

“See? I told you, you just have to let go and give in to what you want… if you didn’t, my fingers wouldn’t be dripping like this, now would they?”

What sort of kinks or fetishes do they have, or would they fill?

He wants to experiment on you. This manifests as him being something of a service top without really intending to be, even if you’re not exactly happy about it. He likes to watch your reactions, watch the way your body moves, test the pleasure you get from different things, discover what it is that you like, even if you weren’t aware of it. In particular, he’s fascinated by the fact that girls have so many types of orgasms. He’ll want to try them all, watch and see which ones are more intense than others, which ones make you convulse, makes your toes curl, your eyes roll back. Which erogenous zones make your breath hitch, make you twitch and whimper. Probably the type to be determined that he can make you cum just from something like sucking on your nipples, and he won’t stop until he achieves it. He’ll also want to try everything. At least anything that he thinks has some potential to appeal to him, mentally. He’s a busy man and hasn’t really taken the time to explore his own sexuality, and has virtually zero experience.

Edging, overstimulation, forced orgasms

Experimentation also means testing limits and thresholds. He’ll bring you up to the edge, learn to watch for the slightest of signs that you’re close, listen to your breath, watch your face, wait until you’re just so close and then draw back, stopping just short of letting you catch that high. Then he’ll let you drift back down, and bring you back up again. No amount of begging will make him show you any mercy, you’ll only cum when he’s decided he’s observed enough. He wants to push the limit, see just how close to the edge of orgasm you can get without spilling over, just how much it takes to drive you insane. He’ll also want to see how far you can go after it as well. Orgasm won’t be the end of his ministrations, no, he wants to see how much stimulation you can take. You won’t be able to get away from his tongue, he’ll grab you by the hips and slam you back down, continuing to lap at you even if you’re so sensitive it’s painful. Watching you cum will just make him rut into you harder, bruising and abusing your insides to a point that they’re so sore you can feel it long after it’s over. At first, he might feel a little guilty, and may very well after it’s over, but in the heat of the moment, he can’t fight the insatiable urge to listen to you squeal, feel you convulse, watch the tears from overwhelming pleasure run down your face.

He’ll make it his personal mission to see how many orgasms the female body is capable of within a given amount of time - per day, per hour, how quickly you can have them in succession. For scientific purposes, of course. Anatomy and human biology isn’t really his main field of focus, but he likes to expand his research horizons.

“Just one more… cum one more time for me, then we’ll be done. Come on… I know you can, just one more.”

How do they feel about pregnancy or babies? Do they want them?

He’s actually good with children, usually. He has a calming effect on kids. He isn’t sure how he feels, though. To some degree, he fears his capabilities to parent, thinks he would be too cold to be a good father. But he also likes the idea of a protege, an heir to his title, one he can teach everything he knows. If he does end up having one, this fucking nerd man will read every book on pregnancy, birthing, and parenting that he can get his hands on.

Also, he’ll absolutely be one to track your cycles, even better than you can. He’s researched enough to know exactly when you’re most or least likely to get pregnant, and you can’t help but notice how much more he seems to cum in you when you’re at your most fertile. Nor can he deny how satisfying it is to watch his cum slowly drip out of you, watching you twitch with aftershock and slowly drift off in exhaustion.

What kind of (nsfw) punishments would they use?

Unfortunately for you, since overstimulation and edging are already normal and everyday for you, he’ll have to amp it up a bit if he’s trying to make you regret something. He might get rougher, abusing more pleasure spots on your body, keeping his hands, mouth, and cock occupied all at once with driving you over the edge until it’s painful. But if you’re exceptionally misbehaved, you might not ever get a release to his edging, instead left to suffer from being so close, tied up so you can’t finish yourself off.

In moments when he’s really, truly angry, the peak of it, and that blends with arousal, he’ll really, really throatfuck you. Grabbing the back of your head and shoving his cock down as deep as he can, holding you there as you gag and choke, feeling your throat convulse around him, desperately trying to pull back for air. The movements are harsh and brutal, pulling harshly on your hair, moving at a pace so fast you barely have a second to breathe. Thankfully, when it gets like that, he won’t last long, emptying out into your throat, holding your jaw shut and demanding you swallow. If any spills off on your chin, he’ll gather it up on his fingers, hold it to your face, and command you to open your mouth, suck it off, and swallow again. That’s at the peak of his anger, though, and you’ll have to substantially piss him off to reach that point. He’ll apologize later, holding you close, but his guilt doesn’t change the fact that it’s one of the most intense orgasms that he’ll have, and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t sometimes think of doing it again, even without provocation. He’s restrained enough not to, but the thought is there… and deep down, he’ll entertain the idea.

What body parts of their darling do they like the most?

The curves of your body, no matter how defined or faint they are, no matter the general shape of your body, to him it’s the most beautiful thing. He’ll definitely want to draw you, even if you’re not too keen on posing. He’ll run his hands up and down your body, squeezing every little bit of flesh he can, moving his palms over every little curve, every inch of your skin.