#fnv headcanons

[irlarcadegannon]

misc portraits and headcanons of my favorite characters. Notes: * All of these headcanons have a little bit of myself in them. * I wrote that Vulpes doesn't understand pronouns because he literally has a hard time with them in english. Pronouns work a bit differently in Latin. * I have given Vulpes heterochromia, like me! Different kind though. Mine is central, his is partial. * I gave everyone flags for the sake of easy understanding for viewers, but in actuality I think identity and symbols for said identity (and all the language around it) would work differently in the wasteland. * Arcade's strict adherence to his own morals and paranoia about it all heavily reminds me of OCD. I don't really like to apply definitive labels to characters because I don't want people to feel excluded or like they can't relate if they don't fall under the same label, so I'm not giving you an exact diagnosis list for everyone, but none of the companions are completely mentally well.

[everydayyoulovemeless]

I saw the teen post, but what about Arcade, Raul, Vulpes, Ulysses, and our man Joshua Grahm parenting a young (orphan) child in the wasteland?

(Also your post are sooooo good<3)

Arcade, Raul, Vulpes, Ulysses, and Joshua Parenting an Orphan Child

➼ Word Count » 1.1k ➼ Warnings » None ➼ Genre » Platonic ➼ A/N » I love all these teen/child asks! They're so cute!!

Arcade isn't sure what to do when he sees you wandering Freeside alone. He'll stand off to the side and watch you for a minute, contemplating whether or not you're accompanied by someone. He doesn't want to jump in if you already have someone taking care of you, but it is a dangerous place to be in, so the worry never leaves him. Eventually, he'll go up to you to ask you a few questions. He immediately takes you to the Old Mormon Fort when you tell him you don't have any parents. At least someone will have an eye on you there. He's not the greatest with kids, especially when it comes to raising one, so you'll be brought up by all of the Followers there. They'll all pitch in here and there as you grow older. They want the best for you, so they gladly teach you all they know to help you grow into a well-rounded and intelligent individual. Of course, Arcade will still be there, and you're always welcome to go and visit his tent. He just won't be the only one watching over you. It's ironically one of the safest places to grow up in, and you'll pick up a lot of medical knowledge during your time there. The KIngs will even come by sometimes to teach you how to fight (they teach all the kids in Freeside how to throw a punch) for when you inevitably want to leave and explore the Mojave on your own. Even though you're in the slums, it's a generally comfortable way to live. And, at the very least, you'll grow up around people who genuinely care for you're well-being.

Raul sees you all by yourself in a world like this and feels an immediate obligation to take you in or, at the very least, find someone else who can. He's nervous when approaching you. He knows what he looks like, and he's not sure how someone as young as yourself will react when you see him. So, when he does walk up to you, he's careful and as non-threatening as he can manage to be. You remind him of his siblings back in Mexico. Even if he hasn't known you for long, he'll come to see you like a little sibling. It's as if life is giving him a second chance and, this time, he won't mess it up. He'd die before any harm ever came to you, and he promises to keep you as happy as possible until he finally croaks. He'll take you back to his shack, set you up in a corner, and talk to you. He'll talk 'till he feels he knows you well. Then, he'll turn the radio up and try to cheer you up by teaching you old Mexican dances. It's hard to remember the hardships you endured all alone with the corpse doing a funny jig. Raul is great at getting you to forget and is a great father figure to you. He's patient, determined, and always does his best to make you smile. You'll be in good hands with him around.

First off, if you're a girl, Vulpes isn't going to care one lick about you. He has no issue leaving a starving, homeless, orphan kid to die out in the desert. If you're a boy, he'll begrudgingly take you in and train you as a soldier for the Legion. Chances are, he's not going to be the one to raise you, and you're just going to be thrown into a training camp, but maybe if he sees enough potential (or Ceasar orders it), he'll take you under his wing. Honestly, though, you're probably better off just wandering the desert alone. There aren't many positive outcomes that being raised by the Legion will bring you.

Ulysses feels nothing but anger and pity when he sees you. Anger at the world for allowing such a young child to suffer through the destruction of the Divide and pity that you're forced to live in it. It's disappointing at best, and he takes you in immediately. You seem to be one of the only things left of his old home, and he doesn't intend to lose you with it. He'll raise you to be independent and powerful--someone that the other factions will learn to fear sooner or later in your life--but for now, he'll focus on keeping you safe. Ulysses never leaves you by yourself, and, if he does, he makes sure you're at least with the eyebots. You'll grow up in a very isolated and indoctrinating environment, where the only real source of information you get is from the radio or Ulysses himself. He cares deeply for you and brings you up as if you were his own. There's nothing in the wasteland that could ever tear him away, and he'll shield you from the horrors of the Mojave as best he can. No matter how he has to do that. He's never afraid to get his hands a little dirty, especially if it's for your sake.

Joshua is confused, to say the least. Where did you even come from? As far as he's aware, the majority of the societies that were living in Zion had been destroyed, and you're definitely not from any of the tribes. If anything, he's concerned. Concerned about where you came from and what will happen to you if he lets you continue wandering. He thanks God that he found you before anyone else did and will quickly bring you back to the Sorrows camp to have you taken care of. The natives love you and teach you as much as they can about their cultures and way of life. They raise you as if you were one of their own, teaching you how to hunt, throw a spear, start a fire, etc. When he deems you old enough, Joshua will take you out and teach you how to shoot. Making sure you know how to live is his top priority. He'll train you just as he used to train the Legionaries, just with a bit more tolerance and patience than he had before. Joshua's biggest fear is dying too soon. He's old and has given God many reasons to kill him off. He's already made arrangements for you to inherit his gun and his bible when he dies, but that doesn't mean he isn't scared. He wants to be with you as a father for as long as he can and would do anything to keep you away from the Legion or the White Legs.

[infestedguest]

A favorite Benny Gecko headcanon of mine is that before House “civilized” the Chairmen/Boot Riders his name was literally just Gecko.

The name Benny is a double reference to both the most powerful trump card in the card game Euchre, and to Benjamin “Bugsy” Siegel, the real life mobster who owned the Flamingo Hotel and Casino and who drove a lot of the development of the Las Vegas Strip in the 1940s. Benny’s entire brand is pretty clearly influenced by Bugsy Siegel, both out of universe by the devs as well as in universe by House and possibly Benny himself, especially considering the buffalo plaid suit. (Bugsy Siegel almost definitely also existed in the Fallout universe and played a similar role as he did irl because the Fallout timeline branches off from ours in 1945, only two years before he was assassinated).

It’d be one hell of a coincidence if that was the name he had as a tribal, and since we know that House’s reinvention of the strip families was specifically in the image of the old world, it only makes sense that that would include names. Swank probably wasn’t called Swank before the Boot Riders became the Chairmen either (I mean, his name is literally Swank).

Gecko doesn’t seem like a particularly unusual name for a tribal to have. It’s the name of a fairly common hostile creature in the Mojave Wasteland that the Boot Riders probably encountered regularly. Geckos were likely at least associated with combat or ferocity in their culture, which given Benny’s description of them when you talk to him at the fort were probably traits that the Boot Riders valued. Thus it isn’t that hard to believe that a Boot Rider would name their kid Gecko. Alternatively he may have earned the name after some kind of encounter involving one or more Geckos, if earning names was a thing in their culture a la the Khans.

We can assume that the usage of Gecko as a sort of surname for Benny could’ve been started by other members of the Chairmen while they were still getting used to the name transition. Like, imagine every single person you know suddenly has a completely different name. Informally tagging a person’s Boot Rider name onto the end of their Chairman name could’ve been a way to prevent confusion in the early days of them being Chairmen. (The implication of this subheadcanon being that every Chairman has a “surname” like this, which I personally think is really cool). People outside of the Chairmen probably just assumed those were their full names, so now they basically are, at least in the public consciousness of the city.

Another possible contributing factor to it’s usage as a surname is the general usage of surnames by other groups the Chairmen interact or associate with, especially the NCR. If House didn’t give the Chairmen last names, or if last names just weren’t a thing for the Boot Riders, it doesn’t seem unreasonable for them to just put their Boot Rider name as their last name when signing paperwork or whatever, or whenever else other people expect them to have one, especially if my subheadcanon from the last paragraph is true and they were already kind of using them that way anyway. Also I like to think there were at least a few Chairmen who, when asked what their last name was, assumed the asker meant the last name that they had.

[sealz888]

Marcus headcanons? ❤️

Hell yeah! Some of these headcanons go over fo1, fo2 and fnv. I've also added some little tidbits of Jacobstown headcanons as a little bonus. I love mutants in fallout so this was really fun. Thank you for the request, I hope you enjoy them.

Marcus (+ Jacobstown) Headcanons

He was slightly higher up, not like lieutenant or really important, certainly not just a random foot soldier, probably a platoon commander, maybe slightly higher. It’s also why a lot of mutants from the masters army and even nightkin will listen to him.

Used to be in charge of a platoon Tabitha was in before she was chosen to become a nightkin. It’s why she trusted him quite a lot before Rhonda died, but her mind convinced her he broke her, so she left.

Always been interested in politics. His vault experiment was what someone's life would be if everything about it was steeped in politics and preparing them for leading outside the vault. He was trained to be a leader.

This actually helped him quite a lot with his skills in the Master’s army, his time as mayor of Broken Hills and later on, Jacobstown.

Still is a bit bitter about the Vault Dweller destroying the vats, however, doesn’t take it out on the Chosen One. 

Absolutely *hated* travelling in the Highway man because of how cramped it was. Also hated the desert because of how fucking hot it was because there was no A/C or Radio. I mean seriously, I’m Australian and I hate the heat so much, and I’m tiny. Can you imagine being fucken gargantuan and living in the MOJAVE/CALIFORNIAN DESERT, HOLY SHIT.

For the first few months of his time as super mutant, he didn’t really remember a lot of his life as a human. However, he was drawn to politics, so whenever he was out, he would try to sneak in books about political theories, historical figures and how to successfully lead things. 

He remembers a lot more of his human life than he lets on, as later on his memories came back to him. He really didn’t like life in his vault due to cutthroat nature of politics. 

Tabitha also came from the same vault and they knew each other. They didn’t really interact or speak a lot, but Tabitha doesn’t exactly remember anything from when she was a human. Marcus thinks she hasn’t really changed at all, in both personality and appearance.

Neil was one of the first people he met after he awoke as a super mutant.

Doesn’t seem like the guy who likes to fight, however. He was a lot nicer to humans than other mutants, so he often dealt with the unity folks. 

When he was younger, he was more inclined to fight mostly because he felt like he had a lot more vitality then, despite not liking it. However, now, he’ll absolutely use diplomacy and only fights as an absolute last resort.

He also does help out with the psykers. He’ll hang out with them occasionally and talk. Trying to make sense of their blind rambling or comfort them when they’re freaking out. 

Due to the nightkin’s proneness to addiction, mental illness and psychotic breakdowns, chems and alcohol are strictly forbidden. However, if found of residential mutants, he has a strict belief in rehabilitation and not punishment. Outsiders who trade it or bring it in with them with the intent to sell have it taken away and destroyed, along with being fined if they do it again.

Before he reached out to Dr Henry, he considered reaching out to the Followers for help, but he decided not to because of how far it is.

Marcus watched Dr Henry like a hawk due to his relations on the Enclave for the first year he was in Jacobstown. 

[tinfairies]

Pegging Benny Gecko Headcanons, if you write for him?

"Uh, you wanna do what now, doll?"

He'll need just a smidge of convincing.

Really for no other reason other than he's never been fucked in the ass before.

Benny would be so cocky and use jokes and witty quips to hide his nervousness.

He's very much a fan of the prep and foreplay involved with pegging.

Likes being on his back so he can see your tits, but he'll get on his hands and knees if you ask nicely.

Loves the feeling of your fingers stretching his ass open, curling and finding that sweet spot.

Will fist at his cock while you prep him, though if you tell him no, he'll pout and beg

Moans like a whore when you finally slide the strap in.

Grabs at your hips, tits, waist, anything to ground him. Benny gets lost in the pleasure quickly.

Once again begs you to touch his cock, or at least let him do it.

"C'mon baby please. It aches."

He could absolutely cum without being touched, especially if you pound into his prostate.

Once he has finally cum, he'll be dizzy and limp. Pulling you towards him, wanting to kiss you and cuddle you.

His whole suave facade melts away and he becomes soft and needy.

Forget cleaning up, he's gonna cling to you for a while.

[fnvmademysoul]

i headcanon that caesar has a serious napoleon complex/short man syndrome. he just looks so fucking little on his throne lol. u cant tell me he's some 6'+ beast of incredible physical aptitude like lanius or even joshua graham is/was.

he's just like 5'4" and probably gets out of breath if he throws too many punches with his displacer glove.

[newvegascowboy]

food & agriculture in fallout: extrapolation and speculative worldbuilding

Okay, well. This is going to be an extremely long and data heavy post. Bear with me.

I'm going to go into detail about the crops and available food given to us canonically and textually. I'm going to be drawing some real world parallels between the crops we see in Fallout and what we have here. I'll be pulling relevant data from all the games, but the majority focus on this post is going to be about the east coast and Massachusetts in particular because it gives us the opportunity to participate in the agricultural climate of the wasteland.

Is there a point to this? Not really, but I'm pedantic and I take things too seriously.

my sources will be linked in the text throughout. for those of you who want to read about agricultural and growing zones of the continental united states, please follow me under the cut.

Growing zones and real world agriculture

Shown here are the growing zones of the united states, divided into a temperature map of about 19 different regions. It's fairly intuitive to read -- colder temperatures are north and east, while warmer temperatures are south and west. The majority of the Mojave desert sits between 7a to 9a, a temperature range of about 20 degrees. DC and the nearby section of the southeast coast sits between 7a and 8a. The interactive map linked below will tell you where your growing zone sits.

The 2012 USDA Plant Hardiness Zone Map is the standard by which gardeners and growers can determine which plants are most likely to thrive at a location. The map is based on the average annual minimum winter temperature, divided into 10-degree F zones and further divided into 5-degree F half-zones.

For the moment, we are going to focus on Massachusetts.

Using the temperature above, we can see that the growing zone of Massachusetts is 5a (-20f) at it's very coldest, all the way to 7b, (5f) at it's warmest during winter. Most of what we see in fallout 5 sits in the 6a to 6b zone, which is middle ground during the winter, but cold enough to want to warrant crops that can withstand the frost.

There is a solid 5 month window for planting annual crops, like corn, melons, and gourds like pumpkin. Your perennial crops are limited to fruit trees and possibly grains, depending on the variety and whether or not a perennial variety has been bred.

Cold weather crops include beets, carrots, greens like cabbage, collards, kale, and potatoes. These aren't the types of crops that will survive the winter as much as these are foods that can go in the ground as soon as it is unfrozen enough to be workable. Root vegetables and greens can germinate in soil as cold as 40 degrees Fahrenheit, which provides some leeway with unpredictable frosts and late planting times.

Much of the agricultural landscape of Massachusetts is dependent on the dairy industry, farming cattle, and aquaculture -- fishing and catching shellfish. Those with access to the coasts, fish and shellfish ought to provide protein during lean months.

Why are we talking about this? Well, if we're stepping into the shoes of a subsistence farmer in the fallout universe, we're going to have to take into account climate and ideal planting times for certain crops. It's not wholly important in terms of things like fic writing, unless you happen to be writing about the life and times of wasteland agriculture, in which case, I hope this is helpful! Again, I am pedantic, and this section is to provide a template when considering and discussing other parts of the game and what their specific diet and agricultural landscapes might look like.

Something to keep in mind when thinking about how farms might function in the Mojave, for instance, or if you're doing worldbuilding for a different part of the US.

Crops in the fallout universe

Now that we're familiar with growing zones and why certain crops are planted and when, we're going to apply some speculative worldbuilding to fallout itself. We will be revisiting growing zones when we talk about other climates, but for the moment, we're going to focus on fallout 4.

Now to preface -- I don't think that the food that is given to us in game is wholly representative of the plants or animals that survived the apocalypse. If some managed to mutant and survive, I'm willing to bet others did. I certainly won't deduct any points from anyone who wants to talk about growing cotton, or farming peaches or cherries, and I won't raise any eyebrows if someone includes things like spices into their wasteland cuisine.

In the 210+ years since the bombs fell, I do not think that the majority of the US is a desolate wasteland, but this post is not going to be my beef with the devs about how brown everything is. This beef is about food in particular. However, for sake of ease, I'm mostly just going to focus on the food that is presented to us in game.

There will be some extrapolation and speculation later, but if I do that for everything, then we'll be here all day, and we've all got things to do.

I would also be remiss to mention that agriculture in the US is old. It predates colonialism. The Native Americans cultivated the land long before any European settlers. They practiced a type of crop growing referred to as Three Sisters planting, which utilized corn, pole beans, and squash -- all things that exist in the agricultural landscape of Fallout as we know it.

Corn

I'm not going to say much about corn because there's not a lot to say about it. We all know what corn is. Fallout's corn is visually similar to wild violet, a hybrid corn.

But I am not going to say Fallout's corn is one such variety or another. In the 210 years since the bombs dropped, I imagine corn varietals have been bred and interbred a thousand times, and it is probably it's own unique strain. It's kind of a moot point. Corn is corn. You can do with yellow corn what you can do with wild violet, and whatever special breeds that make up Fallout's corn.

Corn is the third largest plant-based food source in the world. Despite its importance as a major food in many parts of the world, corn is inferior to other cereals in nutritional value. Its protein is of poor quality, and it is deficient in niacin. Diets in which it predominates often result in pellagra (niacin-deficiency disease). Corn is high in dietary fibre and rich in antioxidants.

You can do a shit ton with corn. It's a staple grain. It would not be incongruous with the fallout setting to have settlers making tortillas, cornbread, polenta, grits, tamales, etc. Corn can also be used to make corn whiskey. The husks can be spun into yarn and woven into garments similar to cotton, which I thought was interesting and also solves the problem of where the hell wastelanders are getting their clothes. Corn can be used as livestock feed, especially in the winter when cattle can't graze. While corn is a staple grain of the US, the east coast has minor corn production compared to places like the midwest. Corn is a staple, but it does not consist of the entire diet of your average wastelander.

Carrots

Not going to say much about carrots either. They're carrots. They grow well in colder soil and tend to have a lot of natural sugars. The carrots we're shown in FO4 seem to be a mutated variety different than the "fresh carrot" consumable in FNV, but there's virtually no difference, so I'm not counting it. Make some carrot cake.

Razorgrain

"This species appears to be quite promising. It's a toothy grain that we may be able to grind in order to replace wheat, which is untenable in the Wasteland. We are uncertain how to increase crop yields, which are very unpredictable. Will continue to study."

Razorgrain is our first unique mutated crop in the fallout setting. It most closely resembles a barley or a rye. Both are a fairly hardy species and can grow all across the continental united states; rye can germinate in cold weather temperatures. It wouldn't be outrageous to assume that razorgrain is similar too or a crossbred variation of both rye and barley. I have decided to base the majority of my research assuming it is a barley variant. Barley is also a major crop on the east coast near the Commonwealth, so that would explain why razorgrain is present in FO4 and not in the other games.

Barley requires a mild winter climate and can grow in growing zones 3-8, so it would be viable in Massachusetts. Barley can be milled into flour and it contains gluten; the gluten content of North American wheat and barley tends to be higher to survive the colder climates, so razorgrain would likely be very glutenous. It is also less susceptible to ergot than rye, but barley can still become infected -- and, I am assuming, razorgrain could as well.

Razorgrain fills the nutritional niche of carbohydrates and can be used to make breads, cakes, pastas, etc. It produces darker breads that have an earthier flavor than milled white flour. There has to be some method of actually milling the grain, though, which is an intensive process that can often be dangerous. Grain can also be used to make malted candy, which is our first option for wastelanders with a sweet tooth. Obviously, razorgrain can also be used to make malt or grain alcohol and is probably the source of all the beer you find littered around the wasteland.

Gourds and melons

Gourds and melons are actually a part of the same family, Cucurbita. The category of 'gourd' covers several different kinds of vegetables, including ornamental fruits that shouldn't be eaten. We aren't going to spend a whole lot of time on this one, simply because canon doesn't tell us that much and there's a lot of wiggle room in terms of interpretation.

FO4's model looks the most similar to a pumpkin, but it could be some other squash varietal from the Cucurbita family, which includes watermelon, honey melon, cucumber, squash, zucchini and pumpkin.

Melons is another pretty broad category. Melons and squash are part of the same family, as mentioned above. If we're going visuals again, the model is likely intended to resemble a watermelon. Watermelons grow best in humid and semi-arid environments between 70 and 8- degrees Fahrenheit. It's not impossible for wastelanders to be growing watermelons, but considering the humidity and frequent rainfall in Massachusetts, the melons would be vulnerable to fungal infections.

There isn't a lot of information on what specifically gourds and melons are in the fallout universe, so you could get away with writing in a pretty wide variety. Personally, I lean a little bit towards melons being a muskmelon variety, like cantaloupe or honeydew. Squash fills in some vitamin requirements for the human diet, and can be canned and stored for winter. It tends to be high in vitamin C and magnesium.

The limit to this one seems to be your imagination. Go crazy.

Mutfruit

This wiki claims that the mutfruit (it has a scientific name apparently, malus maata) is a mutated species of apple and crabapple. There are two different wikis about the mutfruit, both distinct. The first is linked above. The second is linked here -- I got most of my information from this second wiki.

There is a handful of "canon" information we can take from this set of wikis.

Priscilla Penske in Vault 81 is attempting to create foods that have increased resistance to radiation. She mentions the mutfruit would do well, but isn't certain how the hybridization would affect the flavor and texture.[5]

This claim is taken directly from the second wiki, but in comparison, it makes no sense. If the mutfruit tree is a product of mutation, then radiation shouldn't really affect it at all. It's survived and propagated to this point, hasn't it? I am disregarding this claim on the basis of being stupid.

Farmers in at Warwick homestead will comment on the fruit's characteristics, such as tasting sweet and being versatile in recipes.[1][2] The vault dwellers of Vault 81 trade for mutfruit with the outside world, and use it to make special occasion desserts such as pie.[6][7]

If the mutfruit is an apple variant, then it likely has a high sugar content, and it would have to be harvested in the peak of summer or in early fall.

There are fresh apples the be found across the wasteland, implying the existence of apple trees that have been unaffected by the bombs. Personally, I was assuming that the mutfruit was some kind of blackberry, given its appearance as a clustered fruit, or maybe even a type of plum. Regardless, the mutfruit is a fruit, which means that it would preserve well by being jarred or canned, has a high sugar content, and could likely be reduced to form sugar syrups. Like any fruit, it could be used to make alcohol.

Tatos

I want to stop myself from editorializing too much, but goddamn tatos. The crop that makes the least goddamn sense in the fallout universe. The bane of my existence. Let's get into it.

First off, we're given some pretty damning canon facts about tatos:

Tatos are a mutated hybrid of the cross-pollination of the tomato and potato plants.[1] The new consumable looks like a tomato on the outside, but the inside is brown.[2] Commonly cultivated in the Commonwealth, Appalachia and on the Island, its fruit is easy to grow and can keep one from starving, but their taste is described as "disgusting"[2][3][Non-game 1] and resembling "ketchup-flavored cardboard."[1]

According to some old botany texts we found, this appears to be combination of a now extinct plant called a "potato" and another extinct plant called a "tomato." The outside looks like a tomato, but the inside is brown. Tastes as absolutely disgusting as it looks, but will keep you from starving.

Note: This text was written from the perspective of someone who is unaware that both the tomato and the potato are being cultivated elsewhere. The writer also does not mention any sort of DNA test. However, the potato is also found in the Capital Wasteland, and the writer is a scribe in the Brotherhood of Steel, which originated from that area.

Both potatoes and tomatoes are from the nightshade family. They have the same nutrient requirements, and would compete for resources if planted separately but in the same soil. There is a method for planting them together where you splice a tomato stalk onto a potato root, but this is not the same as cross pollination and will not result in what fallout presents as a tato. What will happen is that the roots will grow potatoes and the fruit of the tomato will branch off the stems.

The potato itself is a stem tuber -- high in starch and calorically dense. A stem tuber is an offshoot of the parent plant that will grow beneath the soil as a type of asexual budding reproduction. We all know what a potato is. The tomato is a berry. It's the ovary of a flowering plant -- again, we all know what a tomato is.

I am going to give Fallout a little bit of grace and not comment on how mind bendingly stupid their description of a tato is. The outer skin is a tomato, but the inside is brown and starchy like the potato? I am not going to comment on how it makes little to no biological sense. The starchy tuber is starchy because it's an energy and nutrient storage device. The tomato is the enlarged ovary of a fruit. Why did those things, which are separately very good, combine into one very terrible thing? I don't know. It doesn't make sense. I don't really want to think about it. But these are the facts as they are given to us in game and I suppose I have to live with that. Obligatory "goddamn you todd howard. a pox on your house."

The tato is probably extremely calorically dense. It's specifically mentioned as being easy to grow and it is a better alternative to starving. It's probably grown as a staple crop throughout the planting season. I'm not entirely sure if the tato can produce glycoalkaloids like the potato does (that is, the green sections of the potato that can become poisonous when exposed to light) but if they can, and if stored improperly, it would negatively impact the health of whoever ate them.

I suppose since the taste is so offensive, tatos are better served as a carrier of some other type of food. Fried, mashed, baked -- the purpose of the tato is simply to get calories into your body. Starch can also be turned into alcohol, which I am going to need a lot of after reading the canonical facts of this stupid fucking plant.

 Fallout: The Roleplaying Game Rulebook p.158: "A mutated hybrid of the pre-War tomato and potato plants, with the stem and reddish skin of the former and the brownish flesh of the latter. Tatos provide decent nutrition, but taste disgusting. However, they’re relatively easy to grow and thus are a staple of wasteland agriculture and is an ingredient in a variety of recipes."

fucker

"non farmable" crops

You can't cultivate these plants, but again - we're taking what's given to us and interpreting it extremely literally. There is no reason that these crops could not be domesticated and farmed.

Siltbean

Siltbean is likely a type of bushbean, rather than a pole bean. It's squat and low to the ground. Bush beans require little care or attention and you can pick them when you're ready to harvest them. Historically in North America, beans and corn were grown side by side (though those beans were pole beans using the stalks as support). Bush beans require successive plantings since harvests are early.

There's no good allegory for what type of bean this might be. The potato bean (Apios americana) is native to North America and also produces edible tubers, but there's no reason this couldn't be just some other type of bean. No beans that I could find had red/orange pods.

Beans are a good source of both proteins and carbohydrates, and another crop that can store well for the winter.

Tarberry

Tarberry is a little iffy, considering it is farmed by the ghouls at The Slog, but they're the only farm shown capable (or willing?) to farm the berries. Originally, I had assumed that tarberries were a type of mutated cranberry, and I thought the wiki was supporting me in that claim by saying this:

Tarberries are small, dusty orange berries of the tarberry plant. It is a water-grown crop similar to cranberries.

But cranberries themselves are also canon in the world of Fallout. So who knows! There's no canon information presented on the tarberry's characteristics, so it can be treated the same as any other fruit or berry.

Fungus variants

Glowing fungus: Glowing fungus is one of the few real world equivalents we have. It is a Japanese mushroom called Enoki. It is also farmable as shown in FNV at Hell's Motel.

Brain fungus: This is harvestable, but there aren't any "crops" shown as we would consider them. Considering it's benefits as a mentat replacement, then it's likely that there could be a dedicated space for growing it.

Food and Plants mentioned in the text

Potato

Thank god almighty, potatoes are canon in the universe of Fallout. Fresh potatoes are found as consumables in FO3 and FNV but potatoes are also mentioned in the text of FO4:

Mentioned in dialogue -- {Angry} Shut up Jake. If I hear anything out of either of you, you'll both be peeling potatoes for the next year.

I'm taking this as word of god. Potatoes are canon and I don't care what anyone says.

Tomato

Tomatoes are mentioned in the text, but are never actually seen in game. The only hint that this plant survived extinction is this excerpt from the wiki.

Note: As fresh tomatoes and potatoes are seen in the Mojave Wasteland as of 2281, with the potato seen in the Capital Wasteland as of 2277, the claim of either's extinction by 2287 in the Commonwealth Plant Database could be taken to mean local extinction in east coast regions, as opposed to global extinction. This entry may also just be in error.

There's potential for leeway here, but take it as you will!

Fresh apple

We discussed this back up in the mutfruit section of the essay, but the existence of fresh apples implies the existence of non mutated apple trees. They're found in both FO3 and FNV as a consumable item, so the apple tress have either proliferated across the continental united states, or multiple varieties survived the bombs.

Fresh pear

See above. Pears are also naturally high in pectin, which makes them useful for making jams and preserves.

Pinto beans

Pinto beans are a consumable in FNV and is another W in the bean category of the agricultural landscape.

Jalepeno

Look, I'm picking out this one specifically because I need to believe that other spices and peppers exist in the world. Where would we be without her? Nowhere good.

Raw sap

I am going to say that sap collecting is probably where most of the sugars and sweeteners in the wasteland come from. It's relatively easy to tap trees and collect sap, and it only takes a few hours to reduce the sap down into useable syrup.

Wild Blackberry, Lime, Cranberries, as well as Watermelon as being distinct from simply 'melon' are all mentioned in the text. The list of fruits mentioned or found in the games can be found here.

Animal husbandry

Fallout doesn't give us a lot of canonical information on the animal side of farming. The biggest real world agricultural export of Massachusetts is dairy and cattle farming. Chickens are canon in the worldbuilding of fallout as of Far Harbor, but canon feels both restrictive and extremely loose with regards to what animals can be cared for and how.

We aren't going to spend a whole lot of time on this one, only because the information is pretty limited.

Brahmin

There are plenty of brahmin found throughout the landscape of the wasteland. We most commonly see them as either livestock or beasts of burden. Things like milk, cheese, and other dairy products would be common if a farm has access to dairy cows. The investment to raise cows would be enormous for a subsistence farmer. Dairy cows would likely be kept for a number of years, where steers would be raised 12 to 24 months before being slaughtered; they'd likely be grass fed in the summer and corn or grain fed in the winter. Leather and beef would be products, of course, and things like soap and candles can be made from the beef tallow.

Chickens

Chickens are largely easy to keep and care for, producing eggs and necessary proteins. Chickens can provide niacin, filling in the nutritional gap that would be left by a heavy corn based diet. The investment for keeping chickens is lower than raising brahmin, but so is the payoff.

Bighorners

Bighorners are mutated bighorn sheep native to the American Southwest.[1] Humans have since domesticated them for their horns, meat, milk, and hides,[2][3]

Granted, bighorners are only seen in FNV, but I don't think there's any reason they couldn't have migrated east. In the text, it says they're kept for meat and milk, but there's no reason that they shouldn't provide a fleece as well. In the colder climate of Massachusetts, they would find value in wool, which can keep its warmth even when wet. They may be sparse across the commonwealth, but that would make wool and fleece all that much more valuable.

Fish

Yeah, I know. Technically we can't fish in Fallout (and depending on the game you play, you might not even know what a fish is). But aquaculture is huge in Boston, and with access to the coasts, it's completely fair to say that fish, shellfish, and hydroponics is a completely viable source of food in the wasteland. We see dead fish washed up on shore all the time, along with whatever the hell those shark things are. There should be fisheries and fishing towns all along the coasts.

New Vegas and Fallout 3

Consulting our growing zone chart, we can see that much of the southwest sits between 7b to 8b. The winters in the southwest are fairly mild, and while you can get seeds in the ground sooner, the majority of the battle is going to be finding a reliable water source.

The farming we see in New Vegas has one distinct notable inclusion: the NCR sharecropper farm.

The sharecroppers are growing a number of crops, including maize, tobacco, pinto beans, and honey mesquite. Corn can handle hot, arid weather, it's just not commercially grown out west. Barley can also handle hot, arid climates, and razorgrain would be suitable for the western front -- maybe we can assume it's made it's way that far west and is being cultivated alongside corn.

Most of the plants we see in FNV aren't the type we would see typically domesticated for agricultural use, but that doesn't mean people haven't adapted to their surroundings. It makes a lot of sense for locals to have domesticated local plants like prickly pear and banana yucca. There are a number of fresh produce items to be found as consumables, alongside local fruits the local fruits.

Heat-loving plants are best suited for summer production in desert climates. The plant families that fit into the heat-loving category are nightshade or Solanaceae (tomatoes, peppers, eggplant) and squash or Cucurbitaceae (cucumbers, melons, summer and winter squash). Corn and beans also perform best in hot climates.

Most plants CAN handle the heat and climate of the southwest, the issue is just finding a reliable source of water. Somewhere close to Lake Mead or the banks of the Virgin River would be prime real estate for farming, since irrigation could be accomplished without the use of pumps, like the sharecroppers use.

If we look back at the history of agriculture, it's developed along established waterways in almost every ancient civilization because that's what's easiest. There should be thriving communities surrounding the lakes and rivers in the southwest.

Comparatively, DC was formerly a swamp. It's hot and humid in the summer, though the winters are fairly mild. It wouldn't be a stretch to say that farming practices in the Commonwealth don't differ all that much from farming in the Capital Wasteland -- you could even posit that food from the Capital is of better quality ever since the successful activation of Project Purity. Fresh and unirradiated food was growing there before, so it's entirely likely that even more is growing now. YMMV!

Other consumables

We would be here all damn day if I did research onto every single consumable item available across all three games, so this mostly just because I'm covering my bases.

I am going to say that sap collecting is probably where most of the sugars and sweeteners in the wasteland come from. It's relatively easy to tap trees and collect sap, and it only takes a few hours to reduce the sap down into useable syrup.

Look, I'm picking out this one specifically because I need to believe that other spices and peppers exist in the world. Where would we be without her? Nowhere good.

Pre War food

Most shelf-stable foods are safe indefinitely. In fact, canned goods will last for years, as long as the can itself is in good condition (no rust, dents, or swelling). Packaged foods (cereal, pasta, cookies) will be safe past the ‘best by’ date, although they may eventually become stale or develop an off flavor. 

The risk with improperly canned good, or damaged canned goods, is botulism. Botulism will straight up kill you. You don't even have to consume that much of it; just a little bit will leave you dead in days. As desperate as I might be for a meal, I'm not going to risk dying because that can of two hundred year old peaches looks really tasty.

If properly sealed and in a dry, ideal environment, I... guess things like cereal and instant food could be okay? But again, with access to fresh grain, sugars, and yes, even potatoes and pasta, why would you want to risk eating InstaMash that's been around since before your great grandmother.

Pre War drinks

Sigh. Okay.

Unless stored extremely, extremely well, most bottled drinks aren't going to last much longer than 9 months. A year, if you're lucky. Exposure to sunlight and improper storage will break down the contents -- the best bottles are brown, then green. Clear glass is the worst because it does nothing to protect the liquid inside.

All the Nuka Cola you find throughout the world is flat, nasty, and will probably make you sick. I don't think that really needs to be pointed out, but there we go. I suppose the soda could probably be reduced to form sugar syrups, but with access to sap syrup and grain malt, I'm not sure why you would be desperate enough to do that.

So what does food look like in Fallout?

If there's one thing I know about humans, it's that humans like to eat. Food is culture, as much as culture and community is built around food. Good food and access to it is paramount to human happiness. All this to say is that food in fallout is whatever you want it to look like.

I can extrapolate and theorize all day long based on what Fallout tells us definitively, but I'm not going to tell you what the culinary landscape in the wasteland looks like. The only point that I will stress is that humans are really, really good at making things appetizing.

The fandom is already so creative when it comes to developing their idea of what food means in the wasteland. It's what's directly inspired me to write up this stupid, long ass post about farming and agriculture.

Obviously this is not a comprehensive list of all the base ingredients you can find in Fallout. I picked the ones I did because of the potential for consistent farming. Wastelanders have had two centuries to develop agricultural practices based around subsistence farming. I am not a subsistence farmer, and I have no idea how wasteland cottagecore would work at the heart of it. Running a farm is extremely labor intensive, and so much of your investment has to be immediately recouped in the form of eating what you harvest.

What a farm is likely to look like will start in the early spring when the ground begins to thaw, and a farmer can plant his cold resistant crops, like green vegetables and razorgrain. Potatos, carrots, and tatos will also weather the spring chill. When it starts to warm up, the more delicate plants like corn, beans, and squash or melons will get planted and tended to.

If your family is lucky enough to have a greenhouse, you can keep crops growing all through the winter and have a surplus for trade and barter, or just to preserve and refill the pantries.

A lot of the investment will have to be immediately recouped. Eggs from the chickens can't be preserved, obviously, but there will be meat from hunted animals, milk from the brahmin, probably an early harvest from the beans and tatos, and whatever else is in the pantry from the previous harvest.

Some of it will be canned or preserved in the forms of jams or jellies (just remember what I said about botulism). Meat from animals that get hunted can be smoked or otherwise preserved. Grain can be milled into flour or eaten whole and unshelled. Even the corn silk can be woven into clothes for the summer.

There really is no limit to what can be done in the end. While a lot of this information was taken from what we're given in the text, there's no rule that says you have to follow it word for word. If you believe something exists out there, then write it! We're all just making shit up as we go along anyway. If you need permission, then here it is. You can do whatever you want. Make up recipes! Go insane. Follow whatever your little foodie heart desires.

[newvegasdisasterpan]

I like to think that when you level up in game, it's actually the courier rediscovering themself, and remembering who they used to be. Getting the muscle memory back and realising what that muscle memory was all along.

Like when you decide to take the Lady Killer/Cherchez La Femme or the Confirmed Bachelor/Black Widow perks, its just the courier realising they're attracted to that gender.

[thapunqueen]

okay boone, so we need you to RAWR for the camera (featuring a doodle or 2 of boone with hair bc i was just curious...)

[sirmanmister]

Officially joining the horses are still around in FNV club because I just thought of the legion having fucking chariots and warhorses and gladiator races. Like imagine how fuckinf cool a post-War CHARIOT would be?? We already have those car wagons in like fo2 I think but!!! Horse!!!

Horseback shootouts, racing quests, harder survival mode cuz you also have to keep your steed alive. Assassin teams sent after you would actually be intimidating cuz now you can be stomped to death with their hooves. STOMPING PEOPLE TO DEATH!!! I think this is just describing red dead redemption 2 but frankly I’m okay with that. We need horse

[viperra1]

you know that trope when a character that is so ridden with guilt and shame and regret goes on a healing journey and as they get better their body starts to feel safe enough to finally gain some weight overtime? so. yeah. that one. except it's my Courier with his survival skill as a MAIN ONE, and he's been feeding Boone like five squirrel stews a day

[everydayyoulovemeless]

May I have more Benny relationship headcanons please 🥺

Romantic Benny HCs: 2

➼ Word Count » 0.4k ➼ Warnings » Slightly Suggestive? ➼ Genre » Romantic

Benny loves hugging your waist, especially when you're both in public. PDA is always best when others can see it — at least, that's how he sees it, and what better than showing you off?

He likes to pretend he's a pimp, but every morning when you wake up to his own rendition of a wasteland breakfast, it's hard for him to keep that image up.

He loves cradling your head and peppering kisses all over your face, although he prefers to do it in the privacy of one of his suites. Can't be ruining that reputation, yeah?

He'll get you this beautiful, silver necklace with The Tops logo on it so that others get the message that you're with him and the rest of the Chairmen.

Anywhere you wanna go, Benny will gladly take you. Just whisper a location into his ear, and he'll get on with making preparations.

Whenever he spots you lounging around in his casino, he'll make a big show, grabbing everyone's attention before dipping you down and kissing you.

He likes to give you all these sweet pet names. The ones he uses most often are baby, doll, gem, broad, and sweets.

He has a slight jealous streak where he might 'accidentally' ward off a few acquaintances of yours. You can tell by the shaded look in his eyes when he's not feeling someone as much as you might be, but that's the only real downside of being with him.

Benny's a huge morning person and will gently trace words of endearment into your skin until you finally wake up.

You'll be included in all of his schemes. He's been looking for a reliable partner for a minute now, and you happen to check off everything on the list. You're brave, good with a gun, clever, and an absolute wild card, baby. You guys are the Bonnie and Clyde of the wasteland.

He's not one to be tied down by anyone, but he'd be lying if he said he hadn't considered marrying you. Realistically, he'd never do it, but he'd love to give you a ring if nothing else than as a declaration of loyalty. It's like marriage without actually having to tie the knot.

His favorite thing is when you steal Maria out of its holster and aim it at him. He doesn't know how to explain it, he just knows it turns him on.

[coolguycore]

Not an ask but

I love love how you draw YesMan 😭😭 he looks so amazing in your style aaa

thank you soooo mcuh!!!! im not exactly confident in how i draw him yet so i very much apppreicate this!!!!!!! a yes man just 4 you..!!

i think i draw his face more dopey than i mean to........... he is just so cute to me!!!! i fear that i mischaracterized him this way. ... he is a lot more cheeky than i draw him to be i think

[sealz888]

Fallout headcanons for Vulpes 🥺

I'm trash I know

Thank you for your ask! I didn't realised I had this many thoughts on him compiled. I hope you enjoy these.

Heads up! Content warnings for Domestic Abuse, Domestic Violence, Misogyny, Slavery and general legion stuff. Triggering content is below the cut.

He has Oculotaneous Albinism, specifically Type 1b, explaining his white hair and light eyes, but his tan face. For the unaware and if I may cringe for a few moments, there are multiple types of Albinism, each with different effects and caused by different genes.

Doesn't actually know what a fox is, only donned the moniker after an older soldier nicknamed him. It's actually a coyote head.

He has to dye his hair often and use contacts as his OCA made him stick out like a sore thumb, especially in the Mojave, making it hard for him to infiltrate and spy. Keeps it short for the same reason.

His father actually joined the legion out of his own volition. His father grew up in a misogynistic society and resented his wife and Vulpes' Mother. However, for reasons below the cut, they were actually booted.

His mother gave birth to 3 girls after him.

Due to his abusive family life, he became extremely sneaky, carrying on his legion life. They noticed this and instead of punishing him, they doubled down, training him into a frumentarii.

When he was 7 his family assimilated into the legion, and his mother was pregnant with his third sister. After her birth she ""disappeared under mysterious circumstances"" and Vulpes' never saw her again. (see below cut)

Told his sisters stories to '''help''' them sleep, these stories were actually just him describing what monsters would brutally kill and eat them if they didn't sleep.

A year or two later, his father died in battle. Vulpes' never really cared for his family or bonded with his sister, considering he was dragged out of their lives for training. He was ecstatic when his father carked it, hated the fucker.

Actually managed to get his sisters to be given as wives, not really slaves somehow. I guess because he was related to him by blood and they were slaves, I guess, he was a slave too by proxy.

Had to keep it under wraps, however, considering his cold-hearted rep.

TRIGGERING CONTENT BELOW THE CUT! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

He would often beat her and abuse her in displays of power in front of a young Vulpes' whose name at the time was Michael. Much of his mother's horror and father's admiration, he also began abusing his mother.

He would somewhat tolerate her before she gave birth to Vulpes, appalled that she birthed a '''""ghoul with skin""" and that she couldn't give birth to a normal child. It only got worse and worse as his sisters were born. Vulpes' was also abused for this, but stood proud of his appearance.

His father actually drowned his mother after she gave birth, he had a sneaking suspicion he killed her based on how much disdain he had for her, but doesn't know if it's confirmed.

[tinfairies]

Oh ho ho, you thought no one would notice your post, but i did!

Of course the monkeys paw curls a finger so i will ask for either deputy beagle or chris haversam headcanons (theyre both minor quest characters from new vegas that i am utterly in love with) (please i need more content for them)

Beagle is my cringefail favorite,

Deputy Beagle Headcanons

He thinks he has rizz, he does not. He gets by on just being pretty and thinks it's because he's good at flirting.

Definition of a himbo. Beagle's heart is in the right place but his brain is nowhere to be found.

Flirts with any pretty guy or girl he comes across, though he has more experience with women.

Very lazy, hates waking up before 11am

Likes his coffee with a little bit of cream

Is not a fan of Ruby Nash's radscorpion casserole but pretends he likes it to be polite.

Collects playing cards and has a sizable collection.

Sucks at playing caravan (who doesn't tho?)

Has been to Goodsprings a few times and is pretty well acquainted with Chet

Was practically raised by his older sister, and was very upset by her death. Beagle blames himself for not doing more.

Deeply insecure but too cowardly to do a thing about it or try and better himself.

[jade4valentine]

tweaking out