#for totally legal reasons i assure you

[intimacyequalsdeath]

William Afton x Reader

This Fic is simply and entirely just for an experiment and if you babes enjoy it I will totally write more for this character in the future!

Notes: Minors DNI, Smut, Large age gap implied (Peepaw Afton) Reader is legal and of age but can be any age you'd like that's younger then William. No specific descriptions of reader or pronouns used (If pronouns are used it will be they/them). Daddy kink. Oral sex (Male receiving) William Afton in himself is a trigger warning so head that as you will.

"William I've been telling you about this for weeks!" You screamed at him from the top of the stairs of the home you shared with him. Some friends from college had invited you to go out to a bar with them just to hang out, apparently William forgot.

When you had asked William tonight if you could go he had shut it down with a quick "No" before telling you to go change your outfit and come take a seat on his lap. You instantly got angry as you had asked him four other times and he had said it would be alright.

"Baby watch that tone with me" William reprimanded you calmy as he stood at the bottom of the stairs looking up at you.

You stomped your foot on the ground like a child throwing a fit before escaping into your shared bedroom. You had promised your friends you'd go out and you weren't going to let William stop you.

You threw on a jacket you had taken out of the closest before heading over to the window, You hadn't snuck out like this since you were a teenager but it was worth it to make it to your friends. You opened it and lowered yourself out of it and down to the ground, using the gutter to help keep yourself from eating shit and falling.

Once on the ground you made your way carefully to the front of the house, keeping in mind the living room windows that William would be able to see you out of.

You called a cab to take you to the bar where you were meeting your friends at and soon forgot all about William at home. Your friends and you were having a great time, laughing and joking. You hadn't seen them in what felt like forever and it was great finally getting to hang out with them, until your phone, sitting on the bar next to you lit up.

Your friend glanced down at it before looking up and leaning over to you.

"Hey I think it's your boyfriend?..." She said confused, They knew you were in a relationship but they had never met William.

You picked up your phone to check the messages, You opened the messages and saw a few notifications for Williams number. You tapped on it to open them with your finger. You were met with two separate messages from William that read:

"You must think your so funny baby, Sneaking out like that and going against what I told you to do. I want you home and I want you home now, Don't make me come and get you"

"Ignoring me is not what you want to do right now. Get your ass in a cab and bring it the fuck home. If your not home in ten goddamn minutes your not gonna like the outcome"

You felt a tingle run up your spine reading how mad William was that you had snuck out. You smiled a little before rolling your eyes and typing out a quick

"Looks like your going to have to come and get me then"

Before shutting your phone off and returning back to your friends. The friend you had alerted you to William messaging you shot you a look before leaning back over to you.

"Are you sure this is alright? He seemed really mad your out with us" You laughed a little before quelling her worries.

"No he's fine! He just gets a little worked up sometimes don't worry about it" You assured her, She didn't seem to fully believe you but nodded anyway deciding to drop it.

You were thankful as you really didn't feel like being prodded with questions about your relationship with William. None of them would understand anyway, it was a reason you still hadn't went into detail with them about William.

You ordered another drink, non alcoholic as you didn't want to push William's buttons THAT much. As you soon returned into the conversation with your friends. Laughing and joking once more until another interruption came from the friend who had read the messages.

She shook you on the shoulder a bit then motioned to the door. You turned to see your William, standing in the middle of the bar in all his glory. Eyes scanning the semi crowded room, no doubt looking for you.

Holy shit you thought to yourself, He was actually serious about coming to get me. You ignored the feeling in your lower regions that this ignited when you realized just how possessive William could get. Sure he had always been that way but he had never done anything like this before.

Before William's eyes could find you, you decided to not have a scene in front of your friends. Giving them a quick goodbye and telling them you'd text them later you put money to cover your drinks on the bar and made your way towards William.

His eyes finally met you as you made your way towards him, pushing past some people with a quiet excuse me. He gave you a smile that didn't reach his eyes as you closed the distance between you.

You smiled back at him sheepishly, starting to feel guilty for making him worry and then causing him to be angry at you.

"Will-" You started.

"Don't" He snapped, cutting you off. "Just go get in the car, We'll talk on the drive home" You followed the order without any pushback.

Once settled in the drivers side William started the call, pulling away from the curb and starting the drive home. At first it was silent before William started speaking.

"I want you to explain to me why you thought sneaking out was a good idea" He asked calmy, almost too calmly.

You took a breath before answering him.

"I was mad, I was mad at you for saying no even though every other time I've asked up until tonight it was a yes. I didn't mean to make you mad or worry I just was mad at you and didn't care what you said" William sighed before speaking again.

"So you put yourself in danger cause you were mad at me? are you serious baby?. Do you have any idea what could've happened had you went out and gotten drunk tonight?" William asked, his voice rising in anger slightly as he spoke.

'Will nothing would of happened! I was with my friends!" You exclaimed back to him.

You could see him grip the steering wheel so hard his knuckles were white.

"Will" You said softly, you hand moving to rub his shoulder. "I'm sorry daddy" You felt his shoulder slowly untense under your fingers.

"Baby doll, Your gonna have to do a whole lot better then that" He said. Eyes never once leaving the road.

Your hands snapped to the belt and the zipper of his pants. He angled his hips to assist you in pulling them down just far enough to fish his cock out of his underwear.

You gave it a few strokes, Watching the precum appear on the head. Before bending over to take him into your mouth. You heard William sigh from above as your mouth made contact with his dick.

You gave the head a few licks, before one of William's hands came to the back of your head to encourage you to take him deeper into your mouth. You lowered your head, your lips wrapping around his girth as your began to bob up and down on his cock.

William's hand tightened its grip on your hair as he tried to keep himself from thrusting up into your mouth.

"That's a good fuckin baby huh?" You heard him murmur.

You took him the rest of the way into your mouth, slightly gagging at the feeling of him hitting the back of your throat. You felt William start to move around, Knowing he was close you used your hand to stroke him as you continued to work him in and out of your mouth.

William's hand shoved your head down onto his cock as he came, not allowing you to lift your head up and his warm, sticky ropes splashed against the back of your throat.

You swallowed it as he gave it to you. At once his hand released your head and you were able to lift it up. You picked yourself up and leaned back into your seat but not before fixing Will's pants. He placed a warm hand on your thigh rubbing the soft skin with his thumb.

"That's a good start honey, but bad little bunnies need to get punished for breaking the rules" He said chuckling darkly at the end. You scoffed getting instantly annoyed.

"Really will?" You asked throwing your hands up. "What I did wasn't even that bad, you came and got me anyway" You grumbled. William scoffed back at you.

"You just don't get it do you, you disobeyed me. You have to learn what happens when you disobey me. When we get home I want you to go into the bedroom and wait for me, take that outfit off while your at it" He said patting your thigh before turning his entire attention back to the road to continue the drive home.

When the car, after what felt like an eternity, finally pulled into the driveway you hopped out before William could say anything. You slammed the passenger door shut and stomped your way into the house.

You slammed the front door shut not caring where William ways and made your way upstairs. You sat down on the bed, you weren't going to take your clothes off for Will, if he wanted you out of them he had to do that himself.

You heard his footsteps coming up the stairs and soon enough he was leaning against the bedroom door frame staring at you. Your eyes met his in defiance and you could see the emotions brewing behind them. He sucked his teeth and tsked at you.

"You're really pushing it tonight huh?" He asked sounding almost indifferent, but you knew him better then that. Will was furious.

You leaned back against the headboard, crossing your arms and shrugging your shoulders.

"Yeah, and what the fuck are you going to do about it" With that William pushed himself off the door frame and made his way over to you. His hands at the collar of his shirt making quick work of his tie and undoing the first few buttons.

He grabbed you by your ankle, brining you to the side of the bed so your legs were hanging off and he was standing between them peering down at you. You leaned back onto your hands as he brought one of his up to your neck.

He took the tie the rest of the way out of his shirt and pondered it for a second before giving you the first order of many.

"Give me your hands" He told you. It wasn't a suggestion but an order.

You gulped nervously but nevertheless presented your hands to him. He worked the silky fabric around your wrists before knotting it, not to tight but not to loose. He pushed your connected wrists back forcing them over your head subsequently making you lay the rest of the way down on the bed.

His now free hands wrapped slightly around your neck, giving it a firm squeeze before moving down to your chest. His hands stopped, giving him a second to feel your before they moved up higher, gripping the top of your outfit before tearing it in two.

"Will! This was my favorite top!" You yelled. His hands snapped back to your neck.

"Did I say you could speak?" He asked. It now hit you that tonight, William was serious.

You shook your head as his hands once again ever so slightly increased pressure on your neck. His thumb rubbing over your pulse point almost mockingly.

He took his hands off your neck to go down to remove your bottoms, the ones he had never liked, always "too short" he tutted when you tried to wear them on date nights. He pulled them down your legs before taking his own shirt the rest of the way off. Throwing both articles of clothing elsewhere in the room before turning his attention back to you.

You didn't have anything on under either so now you were entirely exposed to him. Entirely at the mercy of the man standing over you peering down at your naked body.

You watch as Will paused for a second, drinking you in for a second before his hands moved down to his belt. Within no time his belt and pants had been removed along with his underwear.

His cock smacked against his stomach as his took his underwear off before standing at attention. You shivered watching it, the excitement palpable.

He moved to put his knees on either side of your hips, straddling you. He leaned over bringing his mouth to the side of your neck. Running his teeth over your pulse point before licking a stripe where his teeth had been.

"Will please" You begged softly, a hand smacked against one of your thighs.

"Shut up" He reprimanded. He moved so he could pick up your legs, bringing them over his shoulders as he pushed his length into you.

You gasped at the sudden feeling of being full as he bottomed out. His hips meeting yours as he sheathed himself entirely inside of you giving you no time to adjust to his girth and length.

"This is what bad bunnies get" He told you.

He began to thrust, in and out in and out at a steady pace. The only sound that filled the room was skin slapping against skin as he punished you. Your eyes began to roll back into your head as he fucked you stupid, He brought a hand up to lightly smack your cheek.

"Eyes one me, No where else but me" He commanded. Your eyes opened back up and met his.

You could feel the heat quickly gathering in your belly, your orgasm approaching you. You moaned loudly as the bliss washed over you. Your eyes not helping but to roll back in your head as the orgasm ripped through your body.

William didn't stop though, he continued to thrust just as hard as he had been. Shortly there after you could feel the start of your second orgasm quickly approaching you.

You tried to lift your connected wrists up to push at William but he took a hand to slam them back down against the bed.

"That's a good fucking bunny!" He yelled, as sticky hot ropes of his cum began to paint your insides white. A hand wrapped around your throat, pushing you into the mattress as he came and continued thrusting into you.

Your second orgasm of the night washed over you as William finally slowed down but didn't remove his cock. His hands reached up to untie your hands. Now untied you brought your hands around his neck as his face went back to yours.

He used this to put his hands under your thighs and lift you up to move you to lay down in bed fully. Never once removing his cock from you. He covered the two of you with the blanket.

"Will aren't you gonna...Ya know" You asked him wondering what he was doing.

"Nah bunny, Your gonna sleep with me inside you, keeping all my cum nice and warm in you" He said holding you against him and running a hand through your hair.

You were simply too tired to protest against him. Your eyes closing as you snuggled into him.

After a bit you succumbed to sleep. Whether or not you had learned your lesson still had yet to be seen.

[astrowaffles]

Here's To Never Growing Up

“My favourite story about Megumi as a kid is about when we were painting his bedroom,” Satoru began, laughing a little at his memory. “We were going with a dinosaur theme, so the walls were gonna be light green. Megumi takes one look at the colour he picked, yells ‘it looks like puke!’, throws up on the floor, and storms out. He got a pink bedroom the next week, and loved it.”

“You always tell that story,” Megumi complained. “It makes me sound like a spoiled brat.”

Gojo looked at him pointedly. “What happened when I tried to get you to bake cookies with me?”

“…..”

“You threw flour all over the kitchen, didn’t you?”

“I was five!”

“What about when I accidentally played Justin Bieber at your eighth birthday party?”

“I think crawling under the table to cry was justified. It was a horrible song.”

“And when Toge borrowed your wooden toy car?”

“…Yeah, alright, I guess I didn’t need to hit him over the head with it. Still, even if I was spoiled, isn’t that your fault?”

“Eh, I think you turned out alright in the end.”

------------

OR: let's talk about Gojo & Megumi.

“So, you’ve got a TV dad in season two,” the interviewer ventured. He crossed his legs. “How does that work for you? I mean, considering your legal dad is in the same show…”

“Have you seen season one?” Megumi enquired. “Like, did you follow the plot at all?”

“Um, are you referring to anything in particular?” The interviewer uncrossed his legs.

“Yeah, I am.”

“And what would that be…?” Crossed legs again.

“How about the scene where kid-me says ‘I don’t care about my dad, he’s an asshole’?”

Gojo hid a snicker behind his hand, trying (and failing) to pass it off as a cough. He cleared his throat. “Alright, Megs, let’s not get snappy-“

“No, no, it’s alright,” the interviewer hurried to assure him. “I quite understand why it would be a sensitive subject… I do apologise.”

Megumi nodded. “Alright, then. The character of my biological dad in the show is completely irrelevant to my character, as you would know if you’d seen JJK.”

Gojo nodded in agreement. “He literally abandons him, man. And then my character swoops in! So, in a way, I’m his TV dad after all.”

“Definitely more than the biological guy,” Megumi agreed. Gojo beamed at him.

The interviewer was nodding along. “Oh, totally, I do remember that episode. I just meant, how is it to have a real dad on TV, when in real life-“

Gojo slapped him.

“Yeah, it wasn’t my finest moment,” Gojo laughed. He was sprawled across the couch, taking up as much space as possible. His arm was around Megumi, who was sat in the remaining corner, legs curled around himself like a cat. “I stand by it though.”

“What’s worse was that Satoru was trying so hard to be nice to the guy,” Megumi sighed. “He was trying to stop me from being mean to him, but the questions just kept going…”

“Pretty much. Megumi tends to get very heated very fast with interviewers who mention the dad character, because he thinks they’re always leading him down Trauma Lane. He was getting better at staying calm, and then that interview came along. We blacklisted the question after that.” Gojo pushed his sunglasses up his nose, and stretched his legs out in front of him. Megumi rolled his eyes.

“Stop stretching out like that, Toru. You’re kicking the table, look.”

“Sorry, sorry.” Gojo grinned at the camera. “See, he’s always keeping me in line. Imagine how bad things have to be before he starts being rude!”

“Haters will say it’s an overreaction,” Shoko commented, taking a sip of her coffee. “But I’m not a hater.”

“And that’s saying something, because she hates everything else Satoru does,” Geto observed. “But I agree with her. To suggest that Megumi doesn’t have a ‘real’ dad, right in front of his dad’s face … there are so many things wrong with that, on so many levels.”

“See, he’s ever the voice of reason,” Shoko shrugged, jabbing her thumb towards Geto. “I literally don’t care. I’ve known that kid since he was three. I think Satoru should’ve just killed the interviewer.”

“I don’t know Megumi very well,” Geto clarified, “but I’m all for murdering the interviewer.”

Shoko stared at him. “Like, just on principle?”

“Just on principle.”

Silence.

“Well, I never expected that from Suguru, he always seemed so nice, but I did say it first, so-“

“Not that there’s anything wrong with not having a dad,” Yuji clarified. “I don’t. I live with my grandpa. But there’s a lot wrong with telling someone sat right next to their dad that they don’t have one.”

“Like, the moment he said ‘legal dad’, I thought, someone should slap him,” Nobara confessed. “You could tell right from the start that he was going somewhere he shouldn’t, and Megumi knew it too.”

“And the thing is, Megumi and Mr. Gojo have always been so obviously family. We’ve known since day one, even though they didn’t tell us until… day three?”

“Mr. Gojo totally just blurted it out,” Nobara giggled. “Megumi would’ve kept it a secret forever, but Mr Gojo was so proud…”

Itadori smiled at the memory. “Have you guys ever heard the story of how Megumi started acting?”

“What? No! Why haven’t I heard this before?” Nobara turned towards Yuji, giving the story her full attention. Yuji laughed.

“Don’t know, but I’m sure he won’t mind me telling you. Alright, so, before Mr. Gojo adopted him, he was his babysitter, right? Like, this was before Megumi’s dad- well, anyway. Mr. Gojo took him on set with him, because he had to be there and couldn’t leave Megumi by himself… Megumi was probably, uh, two or three. Mr. Gojo would be fifteen or something. And basically, Megumi thought Mr Gojo was so cool that he insisted on becoming an actor too. Mr. Gojo thought, why not, because he could give a helping hand if Megumi needed it. So, Megumi got signed up for an agency, and he got cast in his first show when he was four. And the rest is history.”

“Wait, so, Megumi’s an actor because he wanted to be like Mr. Gojo???”

“Yeah.”

“And he was just … naturally talented? No stage school or anything?”

“Yeah. The same as Mr. Gojo.”

“Shut up, is that true??? Oh my god-“ Nobara turned to the camera. “You heard it here first, guys. Megumi’s whole life trajectory was decided because he idolised his dad-to-be as a toddler- are you crying, Yuji?”

Yuji sniffed. “No. Only a little.”

“It was your story!"

“It’s just so beautiful!! They were meant to be!! Destined family! Doesn’t that make you want to cry too?!”

Nobara paused. “Yeah, actually. It kinda does.”

“A long time ago, when I’d just been adopted, Satoru sat me down at the table and said, ‘You don’t need to call me Dad. You don’t need to see me as your father. I just want to look after you.’ And, yeah, I still don’t call him Dad. But that’s who he is. He’s my dad. He has been for … as long as I can remember.” Megumi looked across at Gojo. “I owe him everything.”

“You don’t owe me shit,” said Gojo, fiercely. “You owe me nothing. You could spend all my money and kill my cousins and you’d still not owe me anything."

Megumi smiled. “You want me to kill your cousins, though.”

“True. Please kill my cousins, Gumi, I literally can’t stand another family reunion-“

“My character’s leopard print tie is inspired by Megumi,” Nanami informed the camera, a nostalgic smile on his face. “When he was younger – maybe ten? – he was obsessed with animals. I was transitioning out of a ridiculous phase at the time, and came to visit him wearing leopard print … he demanded to know if it was made of real leopard. He was absolutely incandescent. I’ll never forget it. He wouldn’t speak to me for weeks, even when I showed him the label to prove it was nylon.”

“You’ve known him for a long time, then?” someone behind the camera asked.

“A while, yeah. Since he was seven. Satoru used to say I was the only one he trusted to make sure the kid was fed while Satoru went to work. What he meant was, he didn’t want Shoko and her twenty cigarettes a day to go near a small child. She ended up quitting just so she could keep hanging out with her nephew. Megumi’s absolutely changed lives – and he’s such a talented man now. You have to give Satoru some major credit, he raised a good kid.”

“My favourite story about Megumi as a kid is about when we were painting his bedroom,” Satoru began, laughing a little at his memory. “We were going with a dinosaur theme, so the walls were gonna be light green. Megumi takes one look at the colour he picked, yells ‘it looks like puke!’, throws up on the floor, and storms out. He got a pink bedroom the next week, and loved it.”

“You always tell that story,” Megumi complained. “It makes me sound like a spoiled brat.”

Gojo looked at him pointedly. “What happened when I tried to get you to bake cookies with me?”

“…..”

“You threw flour all over the kitchen, didn’t you?”

“I was five!”

“What about when I accidentally played Justin Bieber at your eighth birthday party?”

“I think crawling under the table to cry was justified. It was a horrible song.”

“And when Toge borrowed your wooden toy car?”

“…Yeah, alright, I guess I didn’t need to hit him over the head with it. Still, even if I was spoiled, isn’t that your fault?”

“Eh, I think you turned out alright in the end.”

“It was a total take-a-guess-and-hope-it’s-right situation,” Shoko reminisced.

“For fifteen years?”

“Well, more like thirteen, but yeah. No-one tells you how to raise a kid, especially when you’re fifteen yourself. At first, we’d be giving Megumi back to his dad at the end of the day – but then again, all he did at home was go to bed, you know? Everything he learnt, he learnt from us or school. Completely insane.”

“I do have a very vivid memory of the first day of filming,” Geto said, mentally connecting a few dots. “Satoru and Megumi walked in together. Satoru was in a feather boa and pineapple shaped sunglasses, chattering away, and Megumi looked like a glitter factory had exploded in his face. He looked like he was having the worst day of his life, and he had noise-cancelling headphones on. The moment he spotted Yuji, he made a beeline for him – but then Satoru made a super offended noise, and Megumi literally froze in place. He immediately did a complete 180, and went and hugged Satoru, who patted his head and whispered something to him. That’s when I thought, these guys are the real thing. These are the people you want to model your family on.”

“They just understand each other on a different level,” Shoko agreed. “Megumi could be completely overstimulated and about to kill Satoru, but he’ll still hug him goodbye. I don’t know how he does it. If Satoru ever tried to hug me after talking my ear off for an entire car ride, I’d flip him off and go hang out with Yuji instead.”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong, he went straight back to Yuji,” Geto nodded. “I just thought their connection was so lovely.”

“Once, I was idly complaining about something- oh, yeah, it was that Nobara was getting a modelling gig,” Megumi began. “It wasn’t serious, it was just along the lines of ‘I’m not earning anything out of this except my actual pay, what the heck, this is unfair’, yada yada. But then this idiot goes, ‘Do you want a modelling contract? I’ll get you a modelling contract-‘”

“Listen, you were complaining about not having one, I could get you one,” Gojo said defensively. “What do you want me to say? ‘Sucks for you, shut up’?”

“No, but you knew I wasn’t serious! He literally picked up the phone and starts calling his agent-“

“Shoutout to Agatha, you’re a star-“

“He’s just so intent on me getting everything I want-“

“What am I for, otherwise??”

“And then he has the audacity to call me spoiled-“

“I think you’d make a good model, though!”

“I did actually end up getting a contract. Not through Toru, though. Through my own hard work-“

“And your pretty eyelashes.”

“-And my pretty eyelashes.”

“Oh, man, my favourite Gojo and Megumi memory? Probably when we went out for boba,” Yuji mused.

“Oh, yeah.” Nobara started scrolling through her phone. “I have pictures, hang on.”

“I mean, I’m used to parents coming to hangouts with us. They’re useful, because they drive us places and pay for stuff and all that. So I didn’t have a problem with Mr. Gojo coming with us, although I was surprised because I thought Megumi wouldn’t like spending time with his dad."

“Oh, how wrong you were,” Nobara sighed. She held up her phone to the camera. “They get along so well it’s ridiculous. We felt like third wheels to a father-son date, rather than Mr. Gojo being a third wheel to a group hangout.”

The camera zoomed in on the photo; it showed Megumi, Gojo, Yuji, and Nobara in a restaurant. Megumi and Gojo were on one side of the booth, Gojo’s arm over Megumi’s shoulders. Yuji and Nobara were opposite them. All four were smiling at the camera, though Megumi’s small smile stood out in contrast from the others’ beams.

“They’re a lot of fun to hang out with,” Yuji said. “Like, a lot. They’re ridiculous. Megumi would trip Mr. Gojo up in the street, and just keep walking, but if he reached the next bench and Mr. Gojo still hadn’t caught up, he’d turn round and wait for him. Mr. Gojo would stop halfway through a conversation just to make sure Megumi was doing something social, and not just ignoring us-”

“Sometimes he’d purposefully walk ahead with me, to force Megumi to talk to Yuji,” Nobara snickered.

Yuji nodded in agreement, cheeks tinged with pink. “He talks plenty if you can get him started. But anyway, Mr. Gojo bought us boba and let us do our thing, because I think he was super excited that Megumi had friends. It was kinda sweet.”

“That was probably the day we realised that they were father and son,” Nobara observed. “Like, logically, we knew. Like Yuji said, we knew from day one, it’s obvious. But you just don’t get it until you watch Gojo steal Megumi’s boba, or you see Megumi pull a pen out of his pocket because Gojo is always being struck with ideas that he has to write down immediately, or you see them walk in perfect sync, even when they’re not next to each other…”

“You’d genuinely think they shared DNA,” said Yuji, seriously. “And not even halves. You’d think they were clones, sometimes.”

“Uh, I think that’s a bit far,” Nobara disagreed. “They have different personalities.”

“Just wait until you Mr. Gojo do his feral scenes this season. You’ll see what I mean.”

“We make new favourite memories every day,” Gojo said. Megumi rolled his eyes and slapped Gojo’s shoulder. “What? It’s true! Just yesterday, you used a cookie cutter to make my carrots into different shapes because I complained about eating vegetables. I love that memory, just the same as I love remembering me doing that for you ten years ago.”

“He’s a sappy little shit,” Megumi told the camera. “He can’t help it.”

“It’s true, I can’t.”

“His actual answer is that he’s indecisive.”

“It’s true, I am.”

“He also apparently can’t answer for himself.”

“It’s true, I can’t."

“Do you ever STOP BEING ANNOYING-“

“If we’re talking favourite memories of all time, it’s got to be Megumi’s adoption,” Shoko decided. “Satoru cried. Megumi didn’t. Megumi was absolutely overjoyed, you could see it on his little face. I’d never seen such a big smile. I thought his face would split in half. And he’s never done it again; he went right back to being his grumpy self the day after.”

“I genuinely can’t imagine that,” Geto confessed. “Satoru crying or Megumi smiling, I just can’t see it.”

“Neither could I, until I did. You know what people say, about such-and-such having changed their brain chemistry? For me, it wasn’t a song or a book. It was watching my little nephew be able to fling his arms around Satoru, and call him Dad. That’s another thing he never did again, but he did then. It was the best day of all of our lives.”

“I don’t believe in destiny, but I do think it was inevitable,” Nanami pondered. “I mean, if there are infinite alternate universes, like scientists say, I don’t think there’s a universe where they aren’t father and son. Maybe sometimes they swap roles. Maybe there’s a universe where it’s biological, although imagining Satoru with a girl is …. unfathomable…”

“So you think it was written in the stars?”

“In a way. I think Satoru and Megumi are two incredibly stubborn, caring people, and they wouldn’t let something as small as an alternate universe stop them. In this universe, they were born and raised in the same area by people who were friends, and they came together naturally. In the next universe, maybe they find each other through Craigslist. We’ll never know.”

“I’m glad to have met Megumi, yeah,” Gojo said, like it was obvious. “After all, with him around, I get to play with Toast and Maple- ow, Gumi!”

“He actually only looks after me for the dogs,” Megumi told the camera, hand resting on Gojo’s shoulder, where he’d hit him moments before. “It’s a sad truth.”

Gojo sighed. “Alright, I see where we’re going. What do I have to bribe you with this time?”

“Airpods.”

“You already have airpods, you donut.”

“New ones. I want blue ones.”

“What, seriously?”

“Seriously.”

“And if I don’t buy them?”

“……….”

“Oh my god, fine.”

Megumi grinned. “Thanks, Toru!” He turned to the camera. “My dad is the best dad ever. He looks after me, feeds me, combs my hair, supports me emotionally, threatens interviewers for me-“

“And buys you Airpods.”

“And buys me Airpods. Everyone needs a Satoru. Thank you, and goodnight.”

A03 | Exclusives | Tip Me | Commissions

[just-an-enby-lemon]

I unfortunally don't have The Sims 4 anymore (I had the og paired with totally legal not even a lil bit OFMD inspired DLCs but the DLCs bugged for ocean reasons and it broke the og and now I don't have it but can't redowload it because it acts as if it's still on my PC) but I was looking at my phone's note to delete some and I found a detailed traits plan for a bunch of TMA characthers. So I'm posting it here in case someone finds it usefull or a fun thing to discuss (or tells me how to fix my game so I can add new totally legal DLCs and play as my beloved blorbos).

-

The traits change as seasons go because CHARACTHER DEVELO0MENT, my beloved.

P.S: no season 5 because the literal end of the world brings more than 3 traits on it's victims/survivors

Jon - S1: Snob, Perfecionist, Bookworm

S2: Paranoid, Perfecionist, Bookworm

S3: Cat Lover, Gloomy, Paranoid

S4: Gloomy, Cat Lover, Bookworm

Scotland: Socialy Akward, Cat Lover, Bookworm

Aspiration: Reinassanse Sim (nerd) (he can also be a wizard and have Spellcraft and Sorcery or play as uni Jon and have Academic, uni Jon's traits are more open to interpretation I would suggest Perfectionist, Cat Lover and Bookworm but rly up to player)

Martin - S1: Creative, Socialy Akward, Clumsy

S2/S3: Creative, Socialy Akward, Loyal

S4: Gloomy, Loner, Loyal

Scotland: Creative, Jealous, Loyal

Aspiration: Best-Selling Author (when concluded there is also Country Caretaker for the good countryside good cow life, let's pretend the Eyepocalipse never happens and no one is likely a compurter program)

Sasha - Genius, Good, Geek

Aspiration: Nerdy Brain

Not-Sasha - Evil, Mean, Kleptomaniac (stoled some tapes)

Aspiration: Chief of Mischief (I hear you Public Enemy fans but Chief of Mischief has Tormentor as a bonus trait so...)

Tim - S1/S2: Bro, Outgoing, Adventurous

S2/s3: Hot Headed, Gloomy, Adventurous

Aspiration: Extreme Sport Enthusiast (for all the kayaking; other sugestion is Serial Romantic, for all the cop seduction as unfortunally revenge isn't a sims 4 aspiration but maybe there is a mod? Would sugest looking for it)

Basira - S3: Bookworm, Dog Lover, Loyal

S4: Dog Lover, Ambitious, Genius

Aspiration: Nerdy Brain (baby just wants to read and chill)(I'm unsure of her traits cause I actually think she just has all 5 and picking the more evident per season was hard. I feel very proud of Dog Lover for her tho, she loves her werewolf wife)

Daisy - Hunt: Mean, Hot-Headed, Loyal

Post Hunt: Dog Lover, Loyal, Active

Aspiration: Lone Wolf/ Inner Peace (she changes aspiration, also sugestion werewolf, the lone one is cause Basira is all the pack she needs)

Georgie - Foddie, Outgoing, Catlover

Aspiration: Computer Whizz (unsure what do with aspirations for her, I also considered Neighboorhood Confidant for the cult and also how protective she is of her people and Master Actress for the matress add, on the other hand is fundamental you buy the brave bonus trait for her)

Melanie - Slaughter: Hot Headed, Mean, Erratic

No Slaughter: Hot Headed, Geek, Romantic

Aspiration: World Famous Celebrity (with her yt channel)/ Archeology Schoolar (is the closest to non moded paranormal specialist sorry)

Elias- Actually Jonah (that bitch): Evil, Self-Absorved, Genius

Aspiration: Public Enemy (it's the cloest to king of the broken world and it's trait is mastermind, would also recomend Seeker of Secrets for it's beholding energy, tbh he should have both)

OG Nepo Baby: Bro, Lazy, Slob

Aspiration: Fabulosly Welthy (he already is but wants to keep being without having to rly work for it)

Peter: Loner, Evil, Child of the Ocean

Aspiration: Sucefull Lineage (hear me out: that's the whole Lukas thing ok? Also isolating people is not a valid option)

Gertrude: Genius, Ambitious, Self-Assured

Aspiration: The Positivity Challenge (?) (Is the closest to stopping rituals ig, if you find smt better please please tell me)

Gerry (my son): Bookworm, Gloomy, Music Lover

Aspiration: The Positivity Challenge (?) (again burning Leitners, stopping rituals, other better ideias would be appreciated)/ Painter Extraordinary (this one was added rn while formating the list for Tumblr and is inspired by happy Gerry from TMAGP : ) )

Michael Shelley- Assistant: Loyal, Good, Clumsy

Aspiration: Friend of the World

Distortion: Eratic, Evil, Insider

Helen Richardson: Non-Comital, Ambitious, Self-Assured

Aspiration: Mansion Baron

Distortion: Eratic, Evil, Cheerfull

(Unsure what the distortion really wants, so my sugestion for aspiration is either whatever the players wants or just keep changing it at random lol)

Agnes (my gal): Romantic, Gloomy, Self-Assured

Aspiration: City Life (because she scaped the cult)/ Soulmate (be it that guy or Gertrude)

Annabelle (my problematic fave): Ambitious, Perfecionist, Genius

Aspiration: I'm unsure maybe Public Enemy for the evil plot + mastermind trait or Friend of the Wolrd but friend is in quotation marks for her.

[thelostgirl21]

How to solve the whole situation once they've found Ciri...

Jaskier: I think Ciri should marry Radovid.

Geralt: Are you insane? He's way too old for -

Radovid: If I may, he's talking about a purely political alliance. I can assure you I'm gay, and I've got absolutely no matrimonial interest in your daughter. I do, however, so happen to have a kingdom that I'd very much love to abdicate from in favor of a queen that might actually have an interest in running it.

Ciri: I could use a kingdom! One that would treat elves, dwarves and humans as equals...

Jaskier: See? She'd make a great queen! They get married, Radovid renounces the throne, they divorce, Ciri inherits Redania - and with it the most powerful army in the North to keep her safe... Oooh! And Yennefer could be her mage adviser!

Yennefer: You sound like you've been giving this way too much thought...

Geralt: Wait. Redania legalized divorce?

Jaskier: And gay marriage, too. *Tries to sound casual about it.* Not that this is, you know, at all relevant to the the current situation.

Geralt: And why should we believe the King of Redania would be keen on giving up power so easily?

Radovid: Look, all I really wanted was a pretty song...

Geralt: *Eyes him suspiciously*

Jaskier: No, he's being honest. Had my doubts, too, but turns out all he really wanted, at first, was a pretty song.

Geralt: *Slowly realizes what this is about, an amused glint in his eyes as he looks back at him.* I thought you didn't do pretty?

Jaskier: *Dramatically throws his arms in the air, slightly annoyed.* Well, apparently I do now, don't I?

Radovid: *Smirking smuggly* I'm "pretty".

Ciri: *Totally missing the innuendo* You really are!

Radovid: *Delighted and preening* Thank you.

Yennefer: *Snorts*

Yarpen: *Points to Jaskier and Radovid* Wait. Has the lute-playing walloper been fucking a King?

Geralt: *Groans and sighs* Again, real subtle, Yarpen.

Yarpen: *Whisling while looking at Jaskier, somewhat impressed.* Didn't think you'd have it in you, friend!

Radovid: Well, technically -

Jaskier: Aaand on that note! I'll also need Ciri to divorce him, so I can marry him after.

Ciri: *Excitedly* You two are getting married?

Jaskier: Only if you are! Which, I'm aware, makes very little sense...

Radovid: I actually did offer to marry him first - and have Redania become the first kingdom to have two kings - but that triggered a bit of a panic attack.

Jaskier: Look, I stopped using that viscount title and left nobility behind for a reason. If Ciri can make room in the castle for a retired king and his traveling bard, I'd be fine spending a few weeks or even months living at court from time to time. Especially at first, so Radovid can help her get settled and update her on the most important issues that need to be addressed and resolved in the kingdom.

Ciri: Of course you'd always have a home here, and I wouldn't just kick Radovid out! Actually, would it be okay for me to let him keep his prince title? Just in case anything happens to me, and -

Yennefer: *Firmly* Nothing's going to happen to you.

Ciri: Yeah but -

Geralt: No buts. We won't allow it.

Ciri: What if I accidentally portal myself to another dimension? Wouldn't want to force me to leave the Kingdom unattended until I get back, would you?

Jaskier: Hate to say it, but she does have a point.

Radovid: Look, if that would give the Princess some peace of mind to have someone willing to be holding the fort in case of emergencies... But, if that were to happen, I'd be needing Jaskier's help.

Jaskier: *Shrugs* I mean, I guess that would work. It's not that I don't want to get involved in making people's lives better in the kingdom, or share in any of those responsibilities. It's just that, no matter how much I love any of you guys - and I really do love you - I tend to get quite antsy and unpleasant confined to a single location for too long.

Radovid: And personally, I've always wanted to travel, meet different people, and experience some of the tales that have inspired Jaskier's songs for myself.

Geralt: You know he makes a lot of those things up, right?

Radovid: *Shrugs* I think Jaskier's always told those stories the way he sees them - for what they are or mean to him according to his own emotional truth, rather than facts. For example, I've always thought that "Toss a Coin to Your Witcher" was about how the world tends to forget that, behind every larger-than-life heroic figure, there's often just someone that needs to be looked after, too, offered a drink from time to time, listened to, and treated as a friend. If accuracy or factually reporting events had been his goal, then he'd have become a historian, not a bard.

Yennefer: That's... surprisingly insightful.

Jaskier: *Swooning* I know... *Sighs happily* He really is quite brilliant, isn't he?

Radovid: *Blushes brightly* I take it my humble interpretation's not too far off?

Jaskier: *Leans in to whisper into his ear.* I'll let you know just how close you got later...

Geralt: *Confused* Okay, what's actually happening here?

Ciri: *Chuckles* It's called poetry.

Jaskier: *Dreamily, mostly to himself* You'd have to be a spoon to get it...

Radovid: *Now also confused* Wait. What? Now I don't get it.

Jaskier: *Winces slightly* Sorry. That one's on me, you're missing context. You're a spoon, Geralt's a hammer - just...

Radovid: ...different tools for different purposes?

Jaskier: *Makes a half strangled noise, as his legs threaten to give up on him.*

Yarpen: *Motioning to Jaskier while looking at Yennefer, bit puzzled* Does your bard usually do that?

Yennefer: *Looking deep in thoughts, seemingly analysing the situation* Not that I've ever been aware of.

Geralt: Yeah, no. That's new.

Ciri: *Incredulously* You've been travelling with him for, like, over 20 years, and you're telling me you've never seen him have a crush before?

Yennefer: Oh! Oh. Yeah, that's um - okay. I think you're right - I mean, I can see the nuance.

Jaskier (*slowly coming back to himself*) & Geralt: What nuance?

Yennefer: *Innocently* Nothing! Just enjoy your spoon, bard. I'll explain it to the hammer later.

Geralt: *Huffs thoughtfully*

Jaskier: *Still looking unsure* Alright...

Yarpen: You know what, I think it's safer if I don't know.

Radovid: I'm actually not entirely sure I follow...

Yennefer: *Uses magic to telepathically communicate with Radovid, making him blush even brighter.*

Radovid: No, I mean, that seems...

Yennever: *Continues to telepathically communicate with him, looking fondly amused, and just the slightest bit smug.*

Radovid: *Bashfully* I'll ah, I'll take your word for it, and thank you...

Jaskier: What did she just say?

Radovid: Nothing bad, and I'll tell you one day, when the time's right, I promise.

Jaskier: *Doesn't look quite convinced.*

Yennefer: *Rolls eyes* I promise it's fine, Pankratz. Now stop pouting!

Jaskier: *Sighs dramatically* Fine!

Radovid: But,to go back to the whole political royal union thing, I did look to see if I could just hand the kingdom over to Ciri - simply name a successor and step down. Sadly, changing the laws of succession would appear to be a complete nightmare!

Geralt: Meaning we have to trust that you'll honor your end of the agreement, and -

Yarpen: What? You really think that King's going to attempt to stay married to your kid with the amount of eye fucking that's been happening between him and your bard?

Geralt: *Groans* Yarpen, for fuck's sake!

Yennefer: That's a bit of a crude way to put it, but he's got a point.

Geralt: You know Dijsktra and Philippa won't be happy about this, right?

Jaskier: Yeah, well, good thing you and Yennefer are scarier than Dijsktra and Philippa.

Ciri: *Crosses arms on her chest, pointedly looking at Jaskier* Why are you overlooking the fact that I'd totally rip their spines out if they tried to come after you and hurt my family?

Jaskier: Gods, I love you kid! *Pulls Ciri into a tight hug*

Radovid: Didn't you say Yennefer was the scary one?

Jaskier: Like mother, like daughter.

Yarpen: *Proudly* I actually taught the cub how to rip out spines.

Geralt: *Gives two vigorous pats on Radovid's shoulder, almost making him fall over* Welcome to the family, Radovid! *Whispering omninously* But, should you ever try to hurt Jaskier or Ciri, trust me, you'll be wishing she ripped out your spine.

Yennefer: Yes, because I know how to eternally trap souls into an infernal dimension.

Radovid: *Hesitating* That's... oddly reassuring. *Visibly relaxing while looking at Jaskier* You were right, love - Dijsktra and Philippa aren't so scary after all, are they?

Jaskier: *Smuggly* Told you!

Yennefer: Are we sure we shouldn't have been warning Jaskier not to hurt him?

Geralt: Hmm... I was just thinking that, too.

[sainamoonshine]

More The Locked Tomb speculation

So I’m not really the smartest when it comes to analysis and meta, and this book series keeps kneecapping me with stuff I didn’t see coming. But there is one (1) theory I’ve been working on since HtN, and this new book just gave me more ammunition. Now, I don’t actually know what the conclusion of that theory is, mind you. But I can sure as heck see the steps that might make the shape of it.

Some facts and speculations about John Gaius and Necromancy. (I’d make a cut but I STILL don’t know how to do it on mobile. Sorry!)

I don’t buy that Necromancy just ‘happened’ to John because he was super special and the Earth loved him lots. It would be the most ‘a wizard did it’ thing in this entire series where the magic system is well defined and thorough.

At the beginning of Nona the Ninth, in the dream, when John mentions their project getting potentially shut down, he says that M- and A- could have found work in that field again, but not him. He was ‘irradiated’ and would never be allowed to work on anything similar ever again. As others have already pointed out, he is clearly leaving out something in his telling of the story. There was an inciting incident that he’s not telling us about that destroyed his reputation somehow

Notice how he also mentions that C- was assigned to them to supervise something about checks and balances but she became ‘on their side’. When they hear about the project shutting down, M- panics about what they’re going to do with all their corpses test subjects (despite how later on in the story John hurriedly assures us they were acquired legally.) There is concern about disposal. Very much implied the bodies are radioactive now. I’m getting some vibes that maybe all the rules of ethics might not have been followed.

Also when the details of their project go public, ‘everyone has an opinion about it’

We know that to give birth to a necromancer, you must: be on one of the Nine Houses, or surrounded by Nine House dirt (as in the case of Judith’s birth.) We also know how Harrow’s parents ensured that she would be a necromancer by killing 200 children at the time of her conception and harvesting the necromantic bloom. Therefore, we can assume that you can only be born a necromancer if you are surrounded by enough ambient thanergy, either at conception or at birth.

When Harrow tells Gideon about this in the pool scene of GtN, she says that the power generated from the infants alone would have been enough to destroy the planet. Infants ‘always do [generate a lot of thanergy upon death] for some reason’

When Harrow confesses the sins of her parents to John in HtN, he is quick to reassure her that she is forgiven and also very insistent that no one else needs to know. No, really Harrow, do not tell anybody about this. Suspicious behavior much?

Let us remember that John Gaius, Necrolord Prime, chose a crown of baby finger bones to represent his divinity.

But let’s go back to his story in NtN for a moment… in the very first chapter, he tells us that the cryo process was entirely working! Except the maternity issue, which was still not totally ironed out. Said ‘issue’ doesn’t apparently warrant more explanation until he’s arguing with the billionaires who want to leave earth almost an entire year later.

The reason the billionaires give include that the cryo process isn’t moral, that there is an 8% mortality rate, and that they haven’t fixed maternity. Apparently earlier in the project their funders hadn’t cared about maternity or mortality rate, and John tells us that ‘we were the ones who argued them down to 8% and asked for more time’. But, funnily enough, then John takes pain to specify that it was M- who had first rejected the high death risk and for more time to fix the maternity issue. I wonder if John himself would have been fine with the cryo being deployed as it was way back then? I wonder if he resented M- for delaying things?

But that’s not the point of this post. Where I’m going with all this is… they were allegedly working on corpses. Where the fuck did they get the data to know that the cryo process would kill unborn babies? How did they test for that? Animal testing???

Anyway. I don’t have anything more and I know this is not coherent but it sure points at something. Nothing is these books is there for no reason. The maternity issue is relevant, and I think something that they tried, some test they did, might have resulted in John becoming a necromancer.

[crimeronan]

god i still love hunting palismen so MUCH episodes of all TIME. like obviously i love the way it subverts expectations with hunter and sets up the Very Concerning Dynamic with belos especially w/ how it actively parallels eda's illness to belos's, it's so so so good. but CURRENTLY what i'm thinking about is just.

hunter's been a silly goofy villain up until then. in e1 he's totally chill about blackmail and kidnapping and murder (because this is the only playtime he gets. but the audience doesnt know that), in e2 he makes odalia shit her fucking pants when odalia had been established as the kind of domineering self-assured abuser who Terrorizes amity. like everything we know about hunter establishes him as someone who's always confident and in control and unfazed by a situation

and then the SECOND he has to team up with luz. the SECOND he isn't the one in charge anymore. HE'S SO MADDDDD

I LOVE IT SO MUCH he's so charming when he's angry i'm SO fond. the decision to have him drop the smooth-talking sassy personality n just start wrassling and throwing hands immediately it's so good. scream. he's just SEETHING for the ENTIRE EPISODE. i made a psot ages ago about how luz stealing his staff is like if you grabbed a guy's cane and then ran & i stand by that wholeheartedly but it's also. like.

god their camaraderie over wild magic is so funny. all i can think about is hunter as one of those gifted kids with accompanying disabilities who have always been top of the class academically but physically or socially suffer. and luz being the first other gifted kid that hunter has ever interacted with. and hunter being reflexively spittingly jealous and hissy because that's HIS thing she can't have HIS thing. that's his thing!!

and then luz scritches him just right behind the ears knows hunter's favorite books which he's had to keep secret both for legality reasons and simply because everyone he knows tells him that he's really annoying n burdensome when he infodumps & he's like. h. ohh. mm. rrrrrrr. maybe... it is... ok... to have peers... who are also into the stuff i'm into. prrrrrrrrrr....

[inputs-chaos]

MEET THE TARGET

His job is to explode. @tf2shipswag

(More info under cut)

Most of the time, anyway. They're... not exactly intended for field work. Heck they don't even provide them with anything other than a melee for battle.

The only time he's allowed on the field is when his team's down a member compared to the other. This is why only one target can be active in total.

That's the main reason. The other reason is because he's actually secretly working for both sides for double the amount of money and stress.

He's got a busy schedule.

Mercenaries can block out time with the Target, whether for a moving target to shoot at, or an extra set of hands to help with work. Most of the time when he disappears off to perform his tasks as the enemy team's Target it's assumed he's working with someone else.

RED Target and BLU Target: Red Target and his Blu counterpart are the same person. He uh. Has to do a lot of mental gymnastics to keep everything straight.

Red Target's name on the paperwork is Target Mal Practice.

Blu Target's name is just Ticket. He still responds to Target, because it's his job.

Target knows most of the secret passages and ventilation system, because he uses it to sneak around.

The Target's behave differently, Ticket being more mellow and reserved and Target being more upbeat and cocky. There's a lot more small details that are maintained to keep up the balancing act. It's probably exacerbating the issues he already had with his identity.

Target is a lying liar who lies and feels bad about it. I mean. He doesn't legally exist anyway. But for most things he's a terrible liar until lives are on the line.

Design Notes: Target is designed to fill in for the missing merc in lore, because he can pick up the enemy counterpart's weapons. He's not really offense or defense, even though he can do those jobs, so I suppose he's a support class. His class symbol is meant to resemble that of a Crash Test Dummy's. The helmet helps distinguish his head shape and give him a unique silhouette. The Target's Battle Mechanics: Target, again, only starts out with a melee. This is because he can pick up weapons from intact corpses. Primaries and Secondaries are fair game. He can only hold one of each weapon type at a time, one Primary, one Secondary, and one Melee. No funky shenanigans. The ammo pool of the weapon he scavenged is all he's getting. No ammo packs, no dispenser or cart usage for ammo. But. He also gets whatever stored value that is in the weapon. Heads? Why not. Revenge Crits? Heck yeah. The Medigun has special rules, because it does not have ammo to run out of. But rest assured he does inherit the ubercharge% from the fallen medic. The Medigun backpack will also be worn on his model. He can only get two ubercharges max out of a medigun. Lunchbox Items are one time use. Target is not allowed to pick up Melees because we want him to always be on the lookout for new weapons. And we don't want him to be able to backstab. The Target is bright yellow for a reason. You need to kill him before he scrounges up something deadly. -125 hp -107% , Same as Medic and Spy

Anyway, joining tf2shipswag's tournament. I have a lot more to share about this dude, so asks are open! Will create propaganda later.

[masterfvck]

Crown

Minnie/Yuqi

Theme: Royalty

Content warnings: swearing, smut, mentions of domestic abuse.

Smut content warnings: G!P(Yuqi), loss of virginity, praise, love confession during sex.

Idols: Minnie and Yuqi from (G)I-DLE. There will be other idols as minor characters.

(cross posted on Wattpad(Ocanericard))

--

Being a royal sounds great. It sounds like a dream.

Imagining it: you're rich, you have total control and power over everyone, you can basically do anything you desire.

Well, that isn't the case with everyone.

Princess Nicha Yontararak, otherwise known as Minnie, or Miss Nicha.

Her parents, well... They aren't the best, let's say.

She has two older brothers, but she doesn't speak much to them personally. Her future was all planned out already: become the queen of the country. The Queen of Thailand.

But that wasn't what she wanted, deep inside. She always wanted to be a musician, a singer. She thought the commoner life looked way more interesting.

It was probably selfish of her to think that way, but she couldn't help it. She didn't want to be royalty.

The only three things she liked about being royalty were simple.

1: She was rich. Obviously, who wouldn't love that?

2: The way the commoner children interact with her are absolutely adorable. She loves children, and definitely wanted one as an adult.

3: That one cute knight she sneaks little letters to.

Yes, there was indeed a knight who she was flirting with through little letters.

They had never directly spoken to each other yet, but she planned on making sure it happens soon.

She wanted to get to know her more.

Yes, her.

It became legal to have female knights now, contrary to a few years ago.

She is 25, and it had been established when she was 12 years old.

So, right now, it was the reason the letter she sneaked her, that little yellow envelope.

That's why it read: "meet me in the garden tonight, at midnight. I will be waiting for you. -Minnie ❤️"

She smiled at the way the knight blushed slightly, putting her helmet back on to hide it.

-

And now, she waited for her, sitting in the green grass of the castle's garden, looking at the starry night sky.

The guards weren't very smart, so they don't guard the garden at night.

She hears footsteps, cautious and slow ones.

She turns her head back and sees the knight.

And much to her surprise, she isn't wearing her armor.

The knight freezes for a second, but walks to sit besides Minnie.

"You came," Minnie says.

"Well, yes... Obviously. How could I refuse?" She speaks, for the first time to her.

Her voice is deep.

In a really hot way, actually.

Minnie smiles, then looks away.

"I like your voice. What's your name?"

"I am Song Yuqi, I come from China. It's an honor to be speaking to you in person, your Royal Highness," Yuqi introduced herself, bowing at the end.

Minnie laughed, waving her off. "Please, speak to me casually. All this formality is gonna make me throw up, ew," she reassured, and Yuqi looks shocked.

"I- B-But-"

"Don't stress it, Yuqi. I assure you, be casual with me when we're alone like this. No one else besides us are here," Minnie insists, and Yuqi closes her mouth and nods.

"Okay then, Minnie. Uhm... What did you call me here for?" Yuqi questions, and Minnie looks back in her eyes, which made Yuqi gulp.

"Let's be friends. I want to get to know you better."

Yuqi's eyes widened, and she struggled to find her words.

"I- Uh, well- Are we- Are we allowed to... Be friends?" She asks, and Minnie rolls her eyes and scoffs.

"Who cares? I'm allergic to the rules. They don't matter to me." She sticks her tongue out like she tasted something terrible.

Yuqi starts questioning her whole life at that moment.

What??

"Should we go back to my room? There will be less chances of a guard walking in on us talking like this," Minnie suggested, and Yuqi starts feeling dizzy at this point.

The princess? Inviting her?? To her room???

Is this a dream?!

"Of course. Please lead the way," Yuqi stands up, holding out her hand to help Minnie up.

Minnie smirks as she takes her hand, and Yuqi feels tingly as they make contact.

"Such a gentleman," she teased, and Yuqi blushed slightly.

They sneakily walked to her room, having to hide in a certain spot a few times to hide from the guards nearby.

They finally managed, after a few minutes, to get to the door that led to the inside of her room.

Minnie runs to her bed and flops on it immediately.

She sits up and pays a spot next to her, signalling Yuqi to come sit besides her.

She hesitated a bit, but she followed her silent instructions.

"So, Yuqi. Tell me about yourself," Minnie demands, and Yuqi nods.

"Hmm. Well, I came here to Thailand to become a Knight, because I heard that they actually get paid unlike back in China, and that the pay is pretty good. I trained for multiple years and became a knight in China at 17, then moved to Thailand last year and started as a knight a month after my arrival. I am now 23 years old. I can play the guitar, and someone once told me I am like a puppy."

"I have a guitar! Let me get it!" Minnie exclaims, rushing to her closet and pulling out a guitar.

"Play something for me." Minnie hands her the guitar, and Yuqi starts by checking if it's well accorded.

When she made sure it was, her hands started moving on their own, creating a tune.

It was one Minnie knew well.

As her fingers gently strummed the strings, Minnie could only watch in amazement.

She started humming the lyrics of the song, which made Yuqi open her closed eyes to look at her.

Her voice was gorgeous.

It was nothing like any other voice she's ever heard before.

It was soothing.

She felt herself getting hugged by the melody.

She could almost fall asleep right now.

.

The song ends, and they look at each other.

"You play guitar really well-"

"Your singing voice is really beautiful-"

They look into each other's eyes.

And then they burst out laughing.

-

For the past three months, they've been spending a lot of time together.

Yuqi has been coming to her room almost everyday, and they talked about everything and nothing.

Along with that, they had fallen for each other.

With all the things they said, they learned to appreciate each other. To love their qualities, to love their flaws, and to love who they are as a person.

They haven't noticed it at all.

(Oblivious losers...)

This time, Yuqi walked in on something different.

Minnie was only in a sports bra.

And she didn't even seem to mind.

"Oh, hi! Come on in, quick." Minnie hurried, speed walking to her and closing the door.

"I was wondering when you'd get here," Minnie laughed, dragging her to sit on her bed again.

Yuqi was flustered. Very, at that. Her face was like a tomato.

"Uh- Why are you not wearing a shirt?" Yuqi asks quietly, clearing her throat with a loud ahem.

Minnie raises an eyebrow. "Hm? I didn't feel like wearing one. I'm comfortable in this. Plus, doesn't this make my chest stand out more?" She teases, moving angles and wiggling her eyebrows, to which Yuqi squealed and playfully punched her arm.

"Don't! Do that!" Yuqi whined, and Minnie simply laughed and teased her further.

"Why? Too hot for you to handle?" She smirks, and Yuqi stops functioning.

Yes, she wants to say. But she doesn't, she keeps silent.

Minnie expects another whine, or a scolding, but she only gets silence from Yuqi.

Which she found a bit strange.

"Hey, Yuqi. Are you alri-"

"You have a really nice chest."

It came out before she could hold it back. And she instantly regretted it afterwards.

"I-I mean!! Uhh..." Yuqi stuttered, trying to find the right words.

Minnie simply shushed her by placing her index on her lips.

"Hey, don't worry. I liked the compliment! Like, thanks! You have nice tits too, I'm sure!" She laughs, taking her finger off her lips.

Yuqi looks down.

"No, uh- Minnie, I- I, uh-" she sighs, biting her lip.

Minnie tilts her head, humming.

"Minnie, I have an erection." She finally admitted it, and Minnie was slightly taken aback and surprised by the statement.

"Sorry if it freaks you out! I can go if you want me to-"

"Do you want me to help?"

They stay silent, staring into each other's eyes.

Yuqi gulps again.

"I- I don't have much experience, but I can... I can try," Minnie suggested, and Yuqi thinks about it.

She didn't have any experience either. Hell, she could barely jerk off properly. She did once every like, three months or something. It wasn't often.

"I- Your don't have to if you don't want to," Yuqi reassured, not wanting to make her do anything she doesn't want to.

"But I want to," Minnie looked at her with practically pleading eyes, shining in enticipation.

Yuqi widened her eyes again, and she looked down again.

"I guess, if... If you really want to, then that's fine."

"But do you want to?"

Yuqi looks back at her, face redder than ever.

"Really bad, actually," she confessed, and unconsciously, the two started slowly leaning in.

Looking at each other's lips only.

And they held each other for support as their lips made contact and their eyes closed.

Their lips started moving on their own. They fit almost like two perfect puzzle pieces. Made for each other.

Minnie's hand reached to Yuqi's pants' waistband, tugging on it. Yuqi helped her take them off, leaving only her boxers.

They pulled away after a while, looking at each other again.

"How many inches are you?"

"Uhm... About, maybe, 7.4 inches," Yuqi declares, and Minnie yelps a bit. "Is that too much for you to handle? Not big enough?"

"No, no, it's fine... Nothing I can't handle," Minnie mutters, and immediately pulls her boxers down, revealing Yuqi's not even 7, but 8 inches.

"That's not 7 inches at all! You liar!" Minnie exclaimed, and Yuqi looked at her dumbfounded.

She muttered a quiet apology as Minnie started pulling her own pants and underwear down.

"W-Wait, shouldn't I like- finger you first? Prep you up?" Yuqi suggested cautiously, and Minnie nods.

Yuqi brings her hand closer, then slides a finger in between the folds of Minnie's pussy.

She's surprised at how wet it was already.

Minnie shuddered at the feeling, looking at Yuqi's fingers slowly rubbing and teasing her.

After a minute of teasing, Yuqi slid one finger in, which made Minnie let out a quiet moan, her hands gripping the sheets.

Her finger slowly sinked all the way in, and after a few seconds of not moving it, she slowly started pumping it in and out of her.

As she moved her finger, Minnie released soft sighs and moans.

"Can I add another?" Yuqi asks after a minute or two of moving her finger, and Minnie nods.

"Please," Minnie sighs, her voice quieting a bit.

Yuqi does so, slipping another finger and watching Minnie arch her back and cover her mouth, squeezing her eyes shut tightly and practically shaking.

Yuqi watches Minnie, being in such a vulnerable state, all from her hands.

It's crazy how much power her hands actually hold.

"Do you want to cum like this, or should I make you wait a bit until I get inside you?" Yuqi asks near her ear.

"Mmh- Wanna cum, please, like this," she begs, and Yuqi swears it's a better melody than any of the songs she played for her.

Yuqi kept going, curling her fingers at the greatest spots, watching as Minnie shuddered, moaned, how her hips bucked under her.

"Ah- Yuqi- Fuck!" She cursed. And she cursed before, of course she did, but it was different in this context.

She cursed, but she felt more like she was being blessed than cursed.

It felt amazing- she wondered if her fingers felt this good, how she would feel when Yuqi's erection would be inside her.

With one last pump of her fingers, Minnie's walls clenched around her as she climaxed. The knot shattered, at last.

And Yuqi simply admired her; her face was flushed a scarlet red, her lips were parted ever so slightly, her chest heaved up and down, her eyebrows fere furrowed and her eyes were closed softly. She looked beautiful, truly. Even more than that, she could not find the words to describe the beauty she held.

She must have been God's favorite, if he made her look so drop-dead gorgeous.

She watched as Minnie rode down her orgasm, keeping her fingers still as Minnie panted heavily.

Yuqi was thankful for her being louder than her, because she was a bit embarrassed by her voice sometimes. She had been picked on as a child for it, so she always felt a little shy about it.

As her fingers left her, Minnie opened her eyes and looked into Yuqi's.

Yuqi shuddered, biting her lip.

"I- Uh, I think I'm ready now," she whispered.

"You think? Are you really sure?" Yuqi worried slightly. It was all she did: worry. She worried a lot for people, because not many had been by her side and she didn't want to loose them in any way.

Minnie nods, pulling Yuqi closer to her desperately. "Please, I don't- I don't want to wait any longer. I want it, Yuqi," she begs, and Yuqi smiles at her.

"Okay, I- I'll give you what you want." She then remembered something, one that she should have thought of before.

"Condoms. We- Do you have condoms?" Yuqi asks, a bit rushed. Minnie furrows her brow a, then shakes her head.

"You can just pull out," Minnie suggested, trying to get her to fuck her already, as she was getting quite impatient.

But Yuqi was worried. As she always was. "I- I don't know how good my pull out game is... But, for you, I can try..." she whispered, then slowly aligned herself near Minnie's entrance.

The tip brushed against it, and Minnie shivered and bit her lip.

Yuqi slowly and carefully inserts herself in, and moans at the feeling. "Ah- God, I can already feel how tight you are, you're clenching around me so much."

She lets Minnie get used to the thickness for a moment before going in further, making Minnie moan a bit.

It was a bit more than halfway through, and Minnie already felt a bit full. And she wasn't even completely inside yet.

There was about an inch left, and Minnie was a mess. "Just- Just slam the rest in me, fast," Minnie sighs.

"Are... Are you sure? I don't want to hurt you," Yuqi asked worriedly, and Minnie rolled her eyes.

"Yes! I am so sure, if you don't I'm move myself," she groaned, and Yuqi nodded.

She then abruptly bucked her hips, and her length completely buried itself in her warmth. Minnie moaned quite loudly, arching her back further.

"Oh my god," she groaned, and Yuqi watched her, once again. She watched her as she slowly started moving little thrusts, listening to her soft moans and sighs.

And again, Minnie's voice overpowered Yuqi's. Yuqi also let out small moans and whimpers, with the feeling of Minnie clenching around her cock.

"Fuck, fuck Yuqi- Y- ah!" Minnie cut herself off with a moan, as Yuqi's dick hit her G-Spot. "Fuck! Right there- God," she grips onto her back, her nails scratching her back. But Yuqi endured the pain and kept going, speeding her movements a little bit and hitting Minnie's G-Spot repeatedly, watching her as she did so.

"Fuck- Yuqi- I'm so close, please don't sto- ah!" Minnie blabbered, and Yuqi obeyed, even speeding up her thrusts a bit more, which got Minnie even closer, and Yuqi as well.

"I- Yuqi, I- I'm c- ah!" With a last moan, Minnie came all over Yuqi's cock, her thighs shaking.

"I'm- ah- I'm gonna-

Fuck-

Minnie,

I- love you-"

She muttered before barely pulling out and releasing on Minnie's abdomen and chest.

They both took time to catch their breaths, Yuqi flopping down besides Minnie.

"You love me?" Minnie grinned, and Yuqi looked away in embarrassment.

"Don't be shy, baby~ Truth is, I do too." Yuqi moved to look at her, and was met with Minnie looking at her with sweet, sweet eyes.

And she smiled.

They didn't say anything else. Just buried themselves in each other's arms and stayed there until they fell asleep.

(Sneaking Yuqi out of the room was difficult.)

-

It had been 2 weeks since they started secretly dating.

Yuqi came to her room everyday, like usual.

And this time, it was different.

Minnie was crying, sobbing her heart out.

Yuqi rushed to her, holding her softly.

"Minnie! What happened? Are you okay?" She asked, full of worry. Minnie curled into a ball and laid on Yuqi's lap.

"I- Fuck- No... It hurts-" Her voice croaked, and Yuqi's heart broke a little at the words. "What hurts, sweetheart?"

"My dad- he-" Minnie couldn't finish her sentence, she broke out into heavy sobs again. Yuqi widened her eyes in rage. She couldn't do much against him. He was the king, after all.

She let Minnie calm down a bit, rubbing circles on her back soothingly as she sobbed on her lap.

As Minnie started to calm down a bit, she sits up besides Yuqi, revealing her tear-stained face, which was all red. Yuqi reached up to wipe her tears with her thumb, kissing the bridge of her nose.

"There, there. Can you tell me what happened?" Yuqi asks softly, holding her gently and Minnie nodded.

"My dad... I, uh. I talked back to him when he told me to get... A husband. I told him I didn't want to, that I would prefer even a wife. And then he... He- fuck, Yuqi, he slapped me and... He- Her started hitting me."

Yuqi grinded her teeth, and Minnie removed her hands for a second to take her shirt off.

It revealed several bruises and some cuts, all fresh and new. Yuqi widened her eyes again, and clenched her fists.

"That asshole," Yuqi muttered through her grinded teeth, and Minnie sighed.

She looked her, dead in the eyes, and she said:

"Let's run away together, Yuqi."

And Yuqi didn't even hesitate to accept.

-

The plan was pretty simple: Pack some stuff, run away to China, then get a flight to Canada and get their Canadian citizenship.

They would be moving to Toronto, and they would finally live a normal life.

But their plan was interrupted when they encountered another knight.

One that Yuqi knew very well.

"Yuqi? Y-You Royal Highness..?" He stuttered when he saw the two, taken aback by seeing the two together.

"Shit- Uhm, hiiii! Yukhei, my bro... What are you doing here?!" Yuqi whisper yelled nervously, hiding Minnie behind her as best as she could.

Yukhei raised an eyebrow, his face morphing into a confused look.

"Uh... I was going out for a walk... What are you doing with the princess?" He murmured, looking around to see if any other knights were there.

"Well-"

"We're running away. Please do not tell my parents you saw us, Yukhei," Minnie cut Yuqi off, and the latter flinched.

Yukhei looked stunned, but soon straightened his posture and bowed to them.

"I see. Then, I wish you good luck on your travel, and plenty of safety. Farewell, Yuqi, and your Royal Highness. I will miss your company," he said, and smiled brightly at them.

They both smiled back warmly, and bowed back to him.

"Thank you, I wish you a good life, Yukhei. Farewell, I hope we will meet again," Yuqi spoke, and they turned back and walked away.

"So, are you gonna tell on them?" Chittaphon asked, and Lucas chuckled.

"Of course not. Yuqi's my best friend. She's like my little brother. I couldn't betray her like that. And the Princess as well. Would you?" Yukhei replied, and the other boy shook his head.

"Nahh, the King's an asshole anyways. Couldn't be bothered to," he whistled, walking back to the castle and Yukhei followed him, laughing wholeheartedly in agreement.

"Don't say that out loud, you idiot!" He warned, and Chittaphon raised his hands up in a mocked surrender gesture.

"Oh, I'm sorry, dad!" He grinned, and they went to guard the garden.

Because no one else ever did.

-

Timeskip: 5 years later.

"Uh, hey, Honey?" Minnie called out as she peeked out of the bathroom, met with a star-eyed Yuqi.

"So? Is it positive?" She asked in enticipation, and Minnie smiled.

She nodded, holding back her tears.

"It is. We're having a child, Yuqi," she announced, and Yuqi ran to hug her wife tightly.

They both celebrated that night with a glass of orange juice for Minnie, and some champagne for Yuqi(which Minnie was very jealous of, so they ended up both having orange juice.)

-

"Twins?! Are you fucking me right now?" She exclaimed when she saw the ultrasound, and Yuqi laughed.

"No, but I did some months ago-"

"Yuqi!!" Minnie groaned, and their doctor, Kim Jiwoo(also known as Chuu,) laughed at the joke.

Minnie pouted and Yuqi approached closer to her belly, grinning widely.

"Hey you guys~ I hope you don't end up as sassy as your mama..." She mutters the last part, but Minnie heard her very well, and slapped the back of her head.

"Ow!!" "Keep in mind this is your fault!"

"You're the one who wanted a baby!"

"You still came inside!! I didn't expect to have twins, you know? There's supposed to be ONE winner in the sperm race!"

"I don't control my cum, Minnie!"

-

Yuqi looked at her first daughter's eyes.

They were barely open for the moment being. But she could tell, they were beautiful.

She smiled warmly at her, holding her hand out.

And her daughter grabbed her pinky gently with her two hands.

Yuqi's heart warmed at the sight, and her eyes watered.

"Welcome to the world, Ning."

Minnie held her first son in her arms.

He had stopped crying, at last.

And she looked at him.

She couldn't yet say what he looked like exactly, since he was just born.

But she knew he was going to be beautiful.

"Welcome to your life, Pasidh."

-

"Suck it up, Ning! You'll never be as fast as me!" Pasidh laughed, running

"Shut up! I'm gonna catch up to you somehow, just you wait, Bambi!" She shouted back, increasing her running speed.

Minnie and Yuqi watched as the two kids played together, smiling adoringly.

"It's Prince! Not Bambi!!" He screeched back, and Ning rolled her eyes.

Soon enough, they were both out of breath and laid down on the grass near their parents, breathing heavily.

"Hey, mama? Mommy?" Ning asked, and they looked at her.

"Can I invite Aeri and Minjeong over? Jimin's out for a trip to Italy," she looked at them with puppy eyes, and they laughed.

"Of course! Did you ask if they could come?" Minnie asked her, and the girl nodded.

"Hey! I wanna invite a friend over too!" Pasidh exclaimed, sitting up abruptly.

"Can I invite Woojin and Junseong over? Pleaaase?" He put his hands together and Yuqi raised her thumb up at him.

"Yeah! I can get more controllers from the basement for your Nintendo if you want," she said, and he jumped happily.

Minnie leaned her head on Yuqi's shoulder, and Yuqi did the same as they watched their kids run inside their house to call up their friends, saying they can come over.

Ah, childhood... The best stage of your life. It's something you miss as you grow older.

And watching it makes you feel warm inside.

Especially knowing that you were the one who caused those moments of happiness.

It makes you feel happy. Grateful.

...

And they lived happily ever after, probably.

---

A/N: this took me so long to write. It has like 4K words. I did not need to go all out for that but guess what? I DID ANYWAYS ☺️ hope you enjoyed this kinda rushed thing. Have a good day/night, eat well, drink well and stay safe ❤️

[eaglesnick]

“Trust, once lost, could not be easily found. Not in a year, perhaps not even in a lifetime.” – J.E.B. Spredemann

Oh what a surprise!

We learn today that yet another senior Tory failed to declare their financial connection with big business. Therese Villiers was the Environment Secretary in Boris Johnson's government between July 2019 and February 2020 and held shares in Shell worth over £70,000. Under the rules all MP’s have to register their financial interests

“…or any benefits which he or she receives, which others might reasonably consider to influence his or her actions or words as a Member of Parliament.”

The fact that it was the Secretary of State for the Environment, who failed to reveal her financial connection to Shell, makes the breaking of this rule particularly damning.

Putting aside Ms Villiers own financial interest in Shell, the Conservative Party accepted more than £1 million from the energy sector when Boris was in power.

“Under Johnson’s leadership, the Conservative Party has received a series of huge donations from the energy sector, totalling more than a million pounds since the 2019 general election."  (opendemocracy: 01/11/21)

Rishi Sunak, in turn, accepted money from the energy sector to help fund his bid to become leader of the Conservative Party.

“Rishi Sunak accepted cash from fossil fuel investors in campaign to become PM. Donations from supporters with links to oil and gas helped fund new Prime Minister Rishi Sunak's Ready4Rishi leadership campaign."

It is probably coincidence, but

“Shell paid zero windfall tax in UK despite record global profits.” (Guardian:27/11/22)

And it is probably coincidence that Sunak is issuing hundreds of North Sea oil and gas licences for drilling despite the worsening climate crisis due to excessive CO2 emissions and  dire warnings from climate scientists.  

Returning to Ms Villiers, she has apologised for beaching the rules, claiming she had not realised her shareholdings were worth so much:

“Ms Villiers deeply regrets her failure to monitor the value of shareholdings and has offered her sincere apologies,” (Irish News: 11/08/23)

It must be very nice to be so well off that you don’t know you have a shareholding of over £70,000 in an oil company. Putting that aside, we have Ms Villiers assurance that nothing she did when Environment Secretary was influenced by her substantial shareholding in Shell, so that’s alright.  Except of course it isn’t all right. Ms Villiers has previous.

In 2021 she was one of three Tory MP’s who were called upon to resign after trying to influence judicial proceedings.

“Three Tory MPs should be suspended over an "egregious" bid to influence judicial proceedings, the Commons Standards Committee has said. Sir Roger Gale, Theresa Villiers, Natalie Elphicke, Adam Holloway and Bob Stewart were found to have broken the rules by seeking to interfere in a legal decision regarding their former colleague Charlie Elphicke who was jailed for sexual assault last year.”  (itvx:21/07/21)

What’s more, Ms Villiers is on record as stating:

“International law is a ‘political construct’ and breaking it is ‘routine’ (Independent: 14/09/20)

All laws are political constructs and it seems to me to be a very short step from “routinely” breaking international law to treating UK law with the same air of contempt. The fact that Ms Villiers has tried to influence judicial proceedings in favour of a friend, failed to declare her financial interest in Shell when she was Environment Secretary, and considers breaking international law to be the norm raises very serious questions concerning her probity.

Sunak had this to say to the British public:

“Trust is earned and I will earn yours”.

I’m afraid you haven’t earned mine Ms Villiers.

[dcbbw]

Hidden Agenda

This story is my (late af) submission for #kiaratheronappreciationweek, utilizing Day #3 (diplomat/polyglot) and Day #5 (relationships/friendships).  This is also an answer to an ask: @twinkleallnight requested a portrayal of Kiara’s diplomatic skills.

@ao719 requested a fun/goofy side of Liara (Liam x Kiara) which I will have to answer in another story.

The story takes place within my Liara Arrangement AU; if you wish to catch up/re-read, it can be found on my Masterlist under Liam x Kiara. (It’s incomplete but should be updating soon)

This flashback chapter takes place before the story start, when Kiara realizes that she’s in love with Liam.

I also attempted to utilize Prompt #3 from @choicesflashfics: “I have a perfectly reasonable explanation for this.” Which I did, but word count … so I’m borrowing it instead.

THANK YOU to all who read this over and assure me it makes sense, and not-so-subtly reminded me I need to return to this series. Your feedback, as always, is invaluable.

THANK YOU to all who will read this story. Your likes, comments, and/or reblogs are appreciated more than you know.

Please excuse any and all typos, missing/extraneous words, and/or grammatical errors. MS Editor rates this story as 98% error-free.

Rating is T for Teen.

All characters belong to Pixelberry

Song Inspiration: Lay Your Cards Out, POLICA

Word Count: 4,127

The Royal Council was in recess, its members milling about the Palace’s East Wing Grand Conference Room partaking of refreshments as they grouped off to discuss the meeting’s progress thus far.

The room was an opulent mix of burnished wood furnishings, brass accents, and marble flooring. Cushions and curtains were a rich, plush burgundy. The Cordonia seal took prominence above the dais, and the country’s flag was strategically placed in corners throughout the space.

Lady Kiara Theron was praised for the effective forward movement of her plan to have Castelsarreillan Wineries, LLC purchase the Ramsford Vineyards. The Lady of House Theron successfully argued that wine export comprised only 12% of Duchy Ramsford’s total revenue, whereas it was 73% of Duchy Castelsarreillan’s.

One wine to represent Cordonia, with grapes picked from various regions throughout the country, would make the libation more exclusive, thus promoting a better demand for it while keeping workers employed and creating new jobs.

Lord Neville Vancouer was only slightly satisfied. While the Council agreed to his request for more allocations to Cormery Isle, they included the friendly amendment that upon completion of a second golf course to accommodate the increase in tourism, Cormery Isle would be subject to a tax increase up to but not to exceed eight percent of its current rate.

The Duchess of Lythikos was in discussion with A. Justin Severus, the Royal Communications and Marketing Director, about promoting her duchy as a year-round ski destination. “May as well make use of constant snowfall,” she pointed out as she sipped lemon tonic water.

Mr. Severus was in complete agreement and offered to set up an appointment to meet within the next two days.

The Queen prattled to Ana De Luca and her press team of the progress she and the King were making as they worked to unify Cordonia across race, political, and class lines.

The King was across the room, talking quietly with Rashad Domvallier, his personal legal counsel, and the country’s Comptroller regarding the upcoming closed session portion of the meeting.

“Are you certain Lady Theron is the correct person to lead the discussion?” Rashad asked, his brows furrowed slightly.

“It’s neither a legal nor a financial matter at this time. Preliminary hearing at best, which requires someone who will best represent and protect Cordonian interests in a sensitive, tactful manner. It requires a … diplomatic touch.”

The King’s eyes surveyed the room as he let his comrades process his explanation. They lit up at seeing Kiara, alone at the buffet table.

“Gentlemen, if you’ll excuse me,” he murmured as he began making his way to his lover.

It was the night before Coronation; Liam and Kiara were in the hedge maze, standing beneath a large tree that held a lone wooden swing. Liam’s back was leaned into the tree bark, his hands shoved into his pant pockets. He studied the ground as he spoke.

“Tomorrow night, I’ll choose the Countess to be my bride and Queen,” he muttered in a broken voice.

Kiara’s palm cupped his cheek; it was damp with quietly shed tears. Her heart twisted at the feel; she wasn’t in love with Liam, but she did care deeply for him.

“Ne pleure pas, mon doux Liam,” she whispered. Don’t cry, my sweet Liam. “It’s for the best. I care for you and immensely enjoy our time together, but I’m not ready for duty and tradition. Madeleine is.” Kiara stared at her shoes before speaking again. “Et je suis désolé, mais je ne rends pas tes sentiments.”

And I’m sorry, but I don’t return your feelings.

Liam lifted his head, transferring his gaze upon Kiara. “I don’t care you aren’t in love with me! If I’m marrying for duty, why can’t it be YOU?” he questioned angrily.

There was the slightest impatience in her voice when she replied. “THAT is a question for your father and Duke Karlington! Frankly, I’m GLAD! I want a career, a chance to be free from titles and Court, to see the world and put my skills to uses that DO NOT involve pouring tea and kissing ass!”

“Are you referring to me, or to Court?” he asked tightly as his jaw jumped slightly.

“COURT, LIAM! I’m not HAPPY we’ll be broken apart, but I swear to you … I’m not Queen material at this point in time.” Her arms and hands raised in supplication. “There’s too much I want to do while I’m still young enough to do it.”

The lovers stared at each other, both breathing heavily from the intense emotions flowing through their blood. Liam’s gaze grew thoughtful as he pondered Madeleine’s offer the night before. He held out an arm, entreating Kiara into his embrace.

A pout on her lips, she relented; she inhaled his scent deeply when her head lay on his chest.

“If you’re agreeable, there may be a way for you to have what you want, and still be a part of my life.”

Kiara was a vision: Her long, straight dark hair had ringlet curls at the ends; her dress was an ankle-length black pinstriped affair with a skinny black belt buckled at her waist. A black slub cardigan covered the ensemble; gray snake-skin stilettos were on her stockinged feet.

“Hi,” Liam greeted bashfully when he was beside her.

Kiara was reaching for a plate when she glanced up. Her breath caught in her throat, and her heart beat a tad faster.

It’s ridiculous how handsome this man is, she thought.

She returned her attention back to the brunch selections offered, debating between citrus-glazed salmon, beef wellington, and grilled duck.

“Ahem! HI! Say it back.”

The future Duchess giggled at the irritation in her King’s voice. “You are so rude!” She lifted her eyes to meet his.

“You’re the one ignoring me,” Liam grumbled.

“Bonjour, monsieur,” she cooed sweetly.

He leaned in closer to her, his lips at the shell of her ear; Kiara repressed a shiver at his nearness. A smile curved her lips as she listened to his sweet nothings. She felt butterflies in her tummy and a giddiness overtake her.

Kiara Theron was in love. With the King of Cordonia. The married King of Cordonia. She wasn’t sure when it happened, or how. But ever since their return from America last month, Kiara found herself … dissatisfied with their arrangement.

Kiara’s first inclination was to turn down the offer. While Cordonian arrangements were commonplace, they were typically between a couple married to other people. As a single woman in an arrangement with the King no less, the Lady would be branded a gold digger which could bring a certain notoriety upon House Theron.

Liam promised her the utmost discretion; only four people knew of the agreement: Liam, Kiara, Madeleine, and Rashad. The Queen and the Counselor had both signed non-disclosure agreements. The contract drawn up offered something to all parties involved:

Kiara was appointed to the Cordonian Office of Ministries as the Diplomatic Liaison for Governmental Relations and given a Junior Ambassadorship representing Cordonia within the UN’s Alliance of Small Island States. Because her work would keep her in the Capital, a gorgeous three-bedroom, three- bathroom townhouse was purchased through one of the Crown’s many foundations for her in nearby Stormholt. In addition to her salaries, which were determined by the government pay sale, she received a robust monthly stipend for her availability and discretion.

Liam received three overnights a week with his lover; business trips abroad with Kiara where diplomatic services were deemed necessary, or the Queen’s presence was not required; daytime luncheons with the caveat that the couple remain businesslike while in public to avoid rumors and gossip.

The King modified his will so that Kiara would be taken care of in the event of his passing. It wasn’t a requirement of the arrangement, but something he wanted to do.

Madeleine was given the freedom to take a lover, or lovers, of her choosing excluding members of House Theron. The Queen would relinquish such lovers once the monarchs began in earnest to provide the country with heirs to secure the Rys line of succession. She was gifted Duchy Valtoria.

The couple agreed to use contraceptives to prevent pregnancy, and to not bring their romance inside of the Palace, or any of the Queen’s properties.

The day the contract was executed, notarized, and attested, the Queen met with a lawyer outside of Court circles to add codicils that no one else needed to know about.

Liam bought Kiara a black Jaguar XF to celebrate.

It had been a satisfactory arrangement so far for Kiara: She had a career doing what she loved, downtime when she needed it, a gorgeous house, and an attentive lover. But between the overnights, trips to countries she’d never visited, and once-a-month trips to New York City where Liam spoiled her with carriage rides in Central Park, dinners at Michelin-starred restaurants, and shopping sprees … Kiara found herself wanting more.

With Liam.

Only Liam.

She was in love with her lover.

But when to tell him?

“Are you prepared for closed session?” Liam asked as he partook heartily of a western omelet.

He and Kiara were seated at a small round table on the veranda. The King rose when he saw his Queen approach them, a plate of fruit and toast in her hand. He guided Madeleine to the table before pulling out her chair and placing her meal on the wrought-iron tabletop.

“What are we discussing?” Madeleine asked, her emerald-colored eyes darting between her husband and his lover.

Normally the Queen of Cordonia would not care what her husband and his plaything were discussing, but given that there was still more meeting to be had, she felt it best to see if there was any information they were willing to share.

“Auvernal,” Liam replied as he lifted his coffee cup to his lips.

“My research was quite informative,” Kiara offered in answer to Liam’s question before they were interrupted. “I must admit to some … curiosité as to why this task landed in my lap.”

She looked uncertainly between the two monarchs.

Liam’s fork speared another slice of egg, meat, vegetables, and cheese. “Auvernal has approached the Queen and I with an alliance; while they have not outright said it was a marital union they seek, one can only presume that is their agenda.”

“But there are no heirs yet, are there?” Kiara hoped she was hiding the dismay she felt at the thought of Madeleine being pregnant.

“Arrangements and alliances are formed decades, scores …  even centuries in advance. The very makeup of today’s Court, the laws we abide by … all formulated by the politics of our ancestors. Personally, I have nothing against an alliance with our neighbors to the east,” Madeleine said in a tone that suggested she was speaking to a small child.

Kiara’s eyes cut to Liam, who shook his head slightly, silently telling Kiara to ignore Madeleine’s tone. He placed his palm atop the back of her hand. “You’ll do wonderfully, Lady Kiara. Consider this a fact-finding mission, so that all parties have the information needed to make the best decision for Cordonia.”

A bell rang, three times. Madeleine rose. “The meeting is convening.” Her dress swished about her calves as she hurried back inside.

“You’ll do wonderfully.” Liam’s lips lingered on Kiara’s cheek. “I’ll see you this evening at the townhouse?”

Kiara nodded, motioning Liam ahead as she struggled to collect her thoughts, torn between hating him and loving him. Why would he ask HER to research Auvernal for a marital alliance between the Cordonian heir and Auvernal’s?

Why wouldn’t he?

Liam thought he was the only one in love.

She was his diplomat. He asked her to do her job.

Now that her duty was done, when would he begin his?

FUUUUUCCCKKKKK.

The thought made her almost physically ill.

When Kiara entered the conference room, she took in the surroundings: Councilmembers seated on the dais, conferring quietly amongst themselves, palms covering microphones. Kiara wondered why no one bothered to simply turn the devices off.

The monarchs were seated at the conference table: Liam and Madeleine sat beside each other on one side, Bradshaw and Isabella on the other, a seat separating them.

Rashad and the Comptroller sat along the wall, notepads and ink pens in hand.

Taking in a deep breath and plastering a smile on her face, Kiara took her seat at the head of the table. “Good afternoon, everyone.”

Head nods and murmured greetings in response.

Kiara shuffled through papers. “I am Lady Kiara Theron of House Theron, Duchy Castelsarreillan. I will be facilitating today’s discussion regarding a potential alliance between Cordonia and Auvernal, item G.1 on the agenda.”

She looked up, her gaze trained on the Auvernese rulers. “What exactly is your proposal? There’s nothing in writing, and the monarchs have not received any information.”

Kiara noted that Bradshaw was handsome in a feeble way. His body was lithe and held muscle definition, but his chin was weak, and his eyes beady.

“I am of the belief that one gets it in writing, not puts it in writing,” Bradshaw quipped, though there was no humor in his tone.

Kiara arched an eyebrow in surprise.

Beneath the table, Isabella kicked her husband sharply in his shin. Bradshaw winced before glowering at his Queen. Isabella was oblivious as she smiled brightly at both monarchs and the diplomat.

“What my … husband is attempting to say, in an extremely crass manner, is that we wish to have a verbal discussion first before drawing up a proper alliance. We don’t wish for either party to be short-changed in what we hope will be a mutually beneficial exchange.”

“King Bradshaw, how long have you been sovereign of Auvernal?” Kiara asked as she placed her palms flat against the table’s surface.

Bradshaw frowned. “Five years.”

Kiara nodded. “And how long have you and Queen Isabella been married?”

All the monarchs were frowning; the Councilmembers leaned forward ever so slightly in their seats. What the hell was Joelle’s daughter doing, and where was this line of questioning leading?

“Five years. Why?”

“July 26, 2017, to be precise, correct? One week after Isabella’s coronation as Queen of Auvernal following her father, King Renaldo, stepping down due to declining health. A wedding not one member of Cordonian Court received an invitation to.”

Everyone’s attention was focused on the Auvernese monarchs.

“What are you implying, Miss Theron?” Bradshaw growled.

“I am saying that you are not the ruling monarch of Auvernal; the Queen is. You are nothing more than Prince Consort.”

Liam’s eyes, which had narrowed at Bradshaw’s deliberate slight, widened at the revelation although he shouldn’t have been surprised. He recalled sporadic visits to Auvernal in his youth and meeting with Isabella, but never Bradshaw.

He cursed himself for the oversight.

“His title in no way invalidates his power nor his ability to speak for us as a couple,” Isabella interjected coolly.

Kiara offered a conciliatory smile. “I’m not saying it does. I’m merely getting the facts straight, so Cordonia knows who holds the power within your dynamic.”

“Bradshaw holds every authority,” Isabella affirmed.

“So again, what is the proposal you wish to present?” Kiara sipped from a glass of water.

“We wish to set forth a marital alliance between our children and the Cordonian heir. We have fraternal twins, a boy and a girl. Preferably, Cordonia will provide its country with more than one child, and an agreement can be placed for both our children.”

“Where would they rule?” Kiara inquired.

Blank stares from Bradshaw and Isabella; interested looks from the Council, Rashad, and the Comptroller.

The question was an excellent one.

In the modern age, a dual monarchy was a rare occurrence, happening only when two separate kingdoms were ruled by the same monarch, followed the same foreign policy, existed in a customs union with each other, and had a combined military but are otherwise self-governing.

That was not the case with either country.

Silence while the visiting rulers struggled to supply an answer. Kiara took the opportunity to gauge the room. Looks of begrudging admiration from the Council, a huge smile from Rashad. The Lady’s eyes met the King’s; he gave her a covert thumbs up. The Queen stared stoically at Bradshaw and Isabella.

“That would be a discussion to be had at such time we actually enter into an alliance,” Isabella responded slowly.

“This alliance you are offering has been paraded before other countries, no? Hidar, Monterisso, Vallenheim just to name a few. Why is Cordonia only now in your sight lines? Surely you are both aware the King has familial ties to your country, and that we have been neighbors since the unification of the Five Kingdoms. A unification Auvernal resisted.”

Bradshaw drummed his fingertips against the highly polished, massive table. “Precisely the reason we chose alternate avenues; despite our shared history and proximity, Auvernal and Cordonia are merely neutral at best. We have no trade agreements in place, no treaties … we exist peacefully, yet uneasily. When talks stalled between other countries, Isabella and I agreed to extend this olive branch in an effort to at least become allies.”

Kiara settled back in her chair, crossing one leg over her knee. Her foot swung rhythmically.

Liam felt his manhood rise in his pants.

“And what exactly are you offering, Your Majesty?” Kiara put sarcastic emphasis on the moniker.

“In exchange for the marital alliance of at least the firstborns of both countries, and an annual monetary gift of $1 billion US dollars until the desired marriage comes to fruition, Cordonia has unrestricted access to the Auvernese military, free reign and use of our ports, and we will provide you with border protection.”

Liam flushed red, disbelief and anger marring his features. “ONE BILLION US DOLLARS? A YEAR?” he repeated in a voice that bellowed throughout the room.

Madeleine leaned over to whisper in his ear.

The Council watched with wide eyes. The Comptroller began patting his vest pockets for his heart medication. Kiara looked at her monarch with concerned eyes.

“King Liam, do you need to be excused?”

He shook his head. “My apologies for the outburst. The amount took me by surprise.” He glared at Bradshaw. “What the hell do you need with that amount of money?”

“It would be a sign of good faith,” Isabella clarified.

“For far less than that amount, we could assemble our own military, which we are in the process of doing. We plan to have a fully functional army, navy, and air command within the next five years,” Madeleine pointed out.

“Cordonia is prospering at a rapid rate. With prosperity comes growth. And enmity, both within and outside of your borders.  A five-year plan is good, but a lot can happen in that time. Should your country be breached, it’s simply a matter of time before your foes are at our door. The use of our military is a preventive measure, albeit a bit self-serving,” Bradshaw explained.

Kiara followed the exchange carefully. “So, you are asking for the monarch’s firstborn at the very least, an estimated $21 billion dollars, and in exchange we get your military not only infiltrating, but surrounding Cordonia as well?”

Bradshaw nodded in conformation.

Kiara smirked mirthlessly. “Most countries would call that a takeover. Just ask Rivala.”

“It wasn’t like that with Rivala, and it wouldn’t be that way with Cordonia!” Isabella contradicted, her tan complexion paling at the mention of the country.

Kiara uncrossed her legs and pulled her chair back to the table. “Let’s discuss the children, shall we? How old are they?”

“Their names are Isaac and Lyra; they’re four years of age,” Bradshaw replied proudly.

“And yet, there are no medical records in Auvernal or any of your neighboring provinces to corroborate Queen Isabella’s pregnancy or hospital stay. I did find birth certificates for the twins; Bradshaw Achilles is listed as the father, but the mother has the same name as the children’s nanny.”

“Lady Theron, what exactly are you saying here?” Duchess Adelaide demanded.

Kiara kept her gaze trained on the Auvernese monarchs.

“My research has uncovered that Bradshaw’s children are not of royal or even noble lineage. Bradshaw Achilles is a decorated war hero who has never seen combat, and a commoner whose wealth bought him a seat on the Auvernese throne.”

Gasps and the buzzing of muffled conversations erupted within the chamber. Madeleine’s eyes were slits as she glowered at her guests. Kiara calmly sipped her water.

“I have a perfectly reasonable explanation for this,” Isabella’s calm tone cut through the cacophony.

“Please, explain to us how you expect to marry off commoner children to the future offspring of our King and Queen, whose noble lineage goes back centuries?” Bertrand questioned as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

Isabella’s lower lip quivered; she was making the most of the attention paid to her in this moment. “What I am about to say is very private and personal between myself and my husband. I trust that it stays in this room.” She looked around, seeing the nods of affirmation from the Cordonian Court.

“Bradshaw and I tried to conceive, but it just … wasn’t working. We decided to attempt with a surrogate. The procedure was performed quietly, with outside personnel. Neither of us could risk the gossip and scandal. The children share my blood; they simply did not share my body.”

Liam and Kiara met eyes. She shook her head, indicating Isabella was lying.

The Comptroller cleared his throat. “May I inquire what became of King Achilles’ fortune? It is my understanding that the country’s coffers are not as full as they could be, confirmed by the financial assistance Auvernal seeks.”

“I spent my money building the mightiest military in the Mediterranean. Being prepared is expensive,” Bradshaw replied, his eyes shooting daggers at Kiara.

Drake Walker looked around the dais. “I think I speak for all of Council when I say we will not approve an alliance proposal at this time, or any time from Auvernal. It’s simply not advantageous to Cordonia, and quite possibly a threat to our national security.”

Murmurs of agreement from the dais.

Madeleine spoke. “I am willing to consider an alliance, given there are certain … modifications.”

Heads turned and spun in her direction. Madeleine looked around, a scowl on her face.

“WHAT? The King and I have a duty to this country to produce heirs, which we will begin trying later this month to do. It is UNHEARD of to have royal heirs not affianced by birth. Find us another alliance, and I am willing to review their terms. Until then, a revised proposal from Auvernal is welcome.”

Shocked silence as the Queen stalked from the conference room.

The meeting was adjourned.

Liam came to Kiara’s side as Council members gossiped amongst themselves. “Love, I had NO idea …”

Kiara stared up at him, her eyes threatening to spill tears. “You’re going to start a family …”

It was neither question nor answer. It was a realization.

Liam shook his head. “No, no, no …”

Kiara briefly shut her eyes. She had planned to tell Liam tonight that she was in love with him. But she couldn’t. The timing was too suspicious; the day the Queen announces that they were trying for a family, the King’s mistress tells him she loves him?

No.

Appearances were everything.

Her eyes opened and she began gathering her papers. “I don’t want company tonight. I’ll be busy summarizing this research for Rashad to review.”

Liam’s expression was stricken, his eyes wide. “Kiara, don’t!”

“You still have two nights this week,” she answered coolly.

It was breaking her heart, but she had to remember her place in this Court, in Liam’s life.

An arrangement. Strange how it never bothered her before.

Madeleine was his wife. Kiara knew they slept together on rare occasions, but that was just sex. A spousal duty. But now, children would be involved. It was now Cordonian duty.

Even stranger how much that hurt her very soul.

“Lady Kiara!” Rashad called out as he approached the couple.

She looked up, a false smile on her face. “Lord Domvallier! Walk me to my car? We can discuss what you’ll need from me.”

Liam slumped in a chair, watching the woman he loved walk away, upset by the rantings of a tantrum-throwing Queen. Not even Queen; Queen Consort.  He would find Madeleine and have a talk with her to remind her she held no political power, and her title was merely a formality.

A thought struck him as he ran his palms down his face. Was it possible Kiara could actually return his feelings?

No. She would have told him.

Elsewhere in the Palace, Madeleine was escorting Bradshaw and Isabella to the side portico where their car was waiting. She spoke in low tones; although unseen, guards were always around.

“I meant what I said. Provide me with a modified alliance proposal with far less money, and no military subversion and I will review it carefully, but I will have … needs of my own that will need to be incorporated.”

“Such as?” Bradshaw demanded curiously.

Madeleine’s green eyes bore into Isabella’s brown ones. “For starters, how did you fake your pregnancy?”

Tagging: @jared2612 @ao719 @burnsoslow @marietrinmimi @merridithsmiscellany-blog @queenjilian @indiacater @kingliam2019 @bebepac @liamxs-world @mom2000aggie @cmestrella @liamrhysstalker2020  @neotericthemis @twinkleallnight @umccall71 @superharriet  @busywoman @gabesmommie1130 @tessa-liam @phoenixrising0308 @beezm @gardeningourmet @lovingchoices14 @foreverethereal123 @mainstreetreader @angelasscribbles @lady-calypso @emkay512 @jovialyouthmusic @21-wishes @princessleac1 @charlotteg234 @queenrileyrose @alj4890 @yourfavaquarius111 @motorcitymademadame @bbrandy2002 @eversoaringqueen12 @queenmiarys @choicesficwriterscreations  

#KTAW: @lizzybeth1986 @sazanes @kiaratheronappreciationweek​

[mooremars]

Visual Things In Camelot That I Love and Need Documented for Reasons:

Act 1 Scene 1: A hilltop near the castle at Camelot

• The first time I saw all the knights coming up over the back of the stage I gasped, it just sets the epic tone very well

• The entirety of the physicality of I Wonder What the King is Doing Tonight, instantly endearing how funny it is

• Arthur trying to hide when he sees Genny coming and then doing a very bad job sneaking away

• Genny making her stabbing motions on the bench in the Simple Joys of Maidenhood

• The look Arthur gives at the audience when Genny asks for his help, just the most incredulous thing

• This is the beginning of Arthur pushing his hair back constantly and I genuinely love this choice it just feels right

• Genny running around trying to escape Arthur's singing

• Tiny Genny walking around Arthur and 100% of her is rage while she names French poets

• Phillipa Soo doing the most absurd poses and face while she's hiding when the knights find Arthur and freaking out that he's the king

• It's hilarious and you can't even see it from plenty of seats but rest assured her limbs are climbing that little wall between the floor and the stage with enthusiasm

• Arthur's king posture, like obviously we see him first hiding in a tree and he's loevable for that but then we see him in king mode and you're totally in

• Also the look they share at the end of the reprise

Act 1, Scene 2: The King's study - one month later

• Arthur's discomfort that you read so clear when Genny calls him Your Majesty

• Arthur's face when Genny asks about courtesans, like he is so distressed

• Genny's little motion of some other place when she talks about extra women, unexpectedly funny

• And then his face so aghast as they talk about his legal right and how he thought she knew he was a decent fellow

• Genny's smirk when she says she can convincingly imitate Merlin mocking Arthur

• Arthur's joy and delight describing the eagle, he looks so boyish and it really sells him as a young king

• Arthur sarcastically walking around the room and making a show of it

• Arthur collapsing on the floor after he cynically proposes that human nature is bad like a toddler having a tantrum

• Then Genny regaly sitting down next to him

• Them pacing around together coming up with the round table, like obviously the point of the stage is that actors are supposed to move around each other in a very specific way but something about the way Arthur and Genny walk around the room/each other, it conveys how in sync they are mentally

• They more excited about the ideas and start walking faster and getting closer then walking away and I am bad at describing but it's good

• And their faces as they get more excited by the ideas, such nerds for good governance

• Arthur miming a round table

• When he almost kisses her at the end and stops himself

• The way they look at each other when he invites France and also when she says she knows he's a decent man, like they are so in love already

Act 1, Scene 3: The countryside outside of Camelot - six months later

• Like 99% of the Lancelot performance is his smug face and chest puffing

• It's so funny

• Every movement is so dramatic in C'est Moi and the scene that follows

• Blustering around the stage - while Arthur is literally unconscious - ranting about his devotion to Arthur and swinging the sword around

• Him dropping to the ground to apologize in the most dramatic way and then trying to do it again when Arthur mentions it again

• Arthur's motion for up you go like this performance has so much humor, it completely makes the show work

• The way Arthur puts his hand on Lance's shoulder and like stage whispers in his ear to tell him to keep the whole almighty favoring him bit to himself

• And then Arthur running back to stop him from continuing the song, a horrified run is not a thing I knew you could convey on stage but here we are

• There are images of Lance's armor but it blinding you in the face is its own experience

Act 1, Scene 4: A park near the castle

• The Lusty Month of May is masterful in every way

• Most of this is out there so all the amazing choreography and Phillipa Soo jumping around the stage are preserved thank goodness

• But but but, the knights thinking Genny has overheard them and waiting in dread and the moment she just pulls out the flowers is so funny

• Their faces go from terror to confusion so fast

• Also this is like extremely present throughout the show but the knights are doing the thing where they're having a philosophical discussion and pacing back in forth on the diagonal of the stage and I love this style

• The dress and flower crown, just perfect I want to be her

• Her face when Pelli mentions Morgan, oh the heartbreak

• But then when Arthur arrives and she starts playing with his buttons while asking him to stay for lunch, the cutest

• And then Arthur's face when Lance says that he doesn't think Genny would be interested in state matters, and really his face when Lancelot says most things in this scene is just a constant oh no

• The way Lance looks up and down the knights and says with work they can achieve a standard, what an asshole

• Take Me to the Fair is just genius

• Genny's pose trying to seduce the knights into being inspired to fight for her and their confused looks as they say they too want to impress the king, comedy gold

• Genny's various pretending to be crying, attempting to touch the knights while hiding her distaste for them, the dramatic movement when she's asking the knights to injure Lance in various ways

• The way she turns her head back when she sings Frenchman to Sagramore

• And all the little breakdowns are great but the disconnect him, vivisect him, open wide him, sub divide him one

• And then her fucking skipping around the stage with Lionel at the end, so so funny

• Every time Phillipa Soo jumps up in delight is a delight

Act 1, Scene 5: The King's study - the night before the tournament

• This scene is Lance's best look, fight me

• The hair up is a personal problem for me

• Also maybe Arthur's best look? I have to ponder that one, he has some solid outfits and crowns

• Arthur's proud stance when he tells Lancd that Genny wrote the treatise

• Genny and Pelli getting excited for Lance's defeat, giddy schoolchildren

• Speaking of giddy schoolchildren, Arthur's when he thinks there a book and then realizing there is not is very good and then he does it all over again

• The look between them when Genny basically dares him to command her to withdraw her permission and he says nothing

• Arthur looking lovesick holding Genny's flower

Act 1, Scene 6: A grandstand - the next day

• Arthur and Genny looking regal as hell, contenders for favorite costumes

• Arthur and Genny's faces as they watch the first two fights, he's so done and she's so rooting for Lance's downfall

• The sword choreography during the tournament, specifically Arthur and Lance fighting

• Arthur taking off his coat and his crown, why does this live so deep in my brain

• Seeing Arthur as a king not just of ideas but of combat skill, I just like it is why

• Arthur handing his sword to Lance when he starts his little baguette tactic

• And Arthur casually sitting down on the bench and grabbing the two swords and then Lance catching the second sword

• The two swords part is all perfect

• Again, the sword choreography is brilliant

• Obviously everyone looking at each other at the end of the scene

Act 1, Scene 7: The castle terrace - on the evening of the same day

• Genny's turn to the audience as she refuses to tell Lance he's being invested

• Also her dress is gorgeous

• Everyone looking and not looking at each other, everything is loaded in this one

• Like breaking news Phillipa Soo can fucking act, everything she does in Before I Gaze at You Again is masterful

Act 1, Scene 8: The great hall - on that evening

• Genny's outfit in this deserves a special special callout

• Arthur looking at Genny looking at Lance, is too much

• Arthur flinging off his cloak

• You can feel the anger in his body language so much

• Everything is on his face in this scene and it hits so hard

• He's just pacing around the stage by himself, it should be this compelling but it is

Act 2, Scene 1: The castle courtyard one year later:

• Genny running off during If Ever Would I Leave You and then coming back

• Also her dress is again stunning, back in France blue for her song with Lance

• I mean I don't have a lot to say because I feel like it's all in the delivery for Lance but it's a stunner

• Mordred skulking onto the stage from the stairs near the front and then flipping off his hood, so dramatic

• Mordred slamming his hands down on the bench when Pelli tells him to come back tomorrow, if the hot topic goths only knew about him...

• Arthur's smug look back at Mordred when he kills the whole secret thing

• Arthur's face when Mordred is being a little shit and he says "no you idiot"

• Another great Arthur outfit

• Mordred yelling fidelity at the direction Arthur exited from

• The entire Seven Deadly Virtues staging is fun

• They love a bit of choreography on a bench in this show and I agree, it's great

Act 2, Scene 2: The King's study

• Everything surrounding and including What Do the Simple Folk Do

• Not to start near the end but Arthur and Genny's dance is the cutest thing on this earth and when Arthur puts his hands on Genny's face at the end and is two seconds from finally kissing her, I am deceased

• Aaron Sorkin please, you have money and influence, let me have video of that dance

• They start out sort of awkward and then get into a rhythm when they're spinning each other around and squeeling as they make their way around the stage, so pure

• Specifically Arthur's little bow and Genny ignoring him so he just follows and when she spins him in and all the twirling

• Also his face when he tells her that she should absolutely not have encouragement at whistling

• And then back at the top, Arthur's face when he says he likes seeing Genny riled up, like he is just so into her it's unbearable

• The visual of them playing chess, Genny reading and Arthur pacing just makes their relationship feel so lived in and special

• They're both just acting the shit out of the whole scene

• But specifically their faces as they discuss Morgan and that they're business partners, and that Genny is sad sometimes are a million tiny heartbreaks

• And how she asks about Morgan and he just starts doing chess again before he answers, really the fact they're carrying on their chess game between lines

• The way Arthur looks at Genny when he says he name right after they discuss his obligation to Morgan and when he starts on his ill-fated love confession

• He looks so pleased with himself when he says business partners and like he shouldn't be but

• And even more specifically Phillipa Soo's face when Arthur says they're more than king and queen, she's so hopefully and I swear she shifts forward in the chair and then her face when he says business partners is soul destroying

• And then Arthur slapping his head into his hands when he realizes what a fuckup he's just perpetrated

• Every tortured facial expression as they fail to connect, as they say the wrong thing or push the other away breaks my heart

• Arthur and Genny's faces when Mordred says Lancelot is the queen's protection for that evening, like burning house this is fine meme in real life

• And on a better note, Arthur's that's an interesting question look, like his desire to engage with confusing things is very endearing

• Also some more good outfits

Act 2, Scene 3: The home of Morgan Le Fey/Guenevere's Chamber/ Castle corridor - on that evening

• The entire staging of Fie on Goodness

• Okay Aaron Sorkin, also this one please

• You know better make it a full performance, I'm actually thinking that I need everything on this list and that seems easier

• Specifically the way the actors move on and off the stage, both to the backstage and up and down the stairs by the front of the stage on either side, in and out of light

• I wish I could watch this number and hear the choreographer talk about specifically this scene because it feels like maybe there's also some purpose to who's still on stage but in shadow but it's hard to tell while it's happening

• Like Mordred is in the middle of some of the Arthur/Morgan parts and it made me curious

• The knights' shadows on the giant stage adds so much to the vibe like awards for whoever figured out the lights for this magnificent number

• And the way they're swinging around the furniture to transition between the Morgan and Arthur, the knights, and Lance and Genny

• It gives everything such urgency and movement and this frantic energy that matches the building tension

• The way they change the projections too, the bricks for the castle and the vines for Morgan

• Morgan's performance is so different from everything everyone else is doing and as soon as she walks on stage, the vibe changes

• And it shifts Arthur too, finally seeing him with the only person in the show (except Merlyn maybe, sort of unclear if he already knew him but wasn't his teacher or not but I digress) who knew him before he was king and he becomes angrier and rougher around the edges

• Also specifically when she says I don't give a damn and strolls offstage again is so good

• Genny pacing furiously while she tells Lance about what Arthur is doing and then her face when she agrees that Arthur doesn't see her as his wife, you can see her resolve snapping

• Modred being pushed off stage on the table

• Morgan spinning her globe(? okay it isn't but I can't remember what that thing is called) as she leaves gets me every time

• Arthur's face as he realizes what's happening and then his desperate run out

• This scene is an immaculate masterpiece

• In general the ways the actors moved around the stage was phenomenal. This is not something I generally notice but since there's not a ton of dance-y dancing in the show, it really stands out how perfectly everyone is traversing the giant stage

• Also the way they move in and out the scenery is an extension of that where it's all just fluid and natural

• And this is the finest showcase

• And knockout performances by Phillipa Soo and Jordan Donica in I Loved You Once In Silence, the pain and guilt is just so apparent

• Lance grabbing the sword

• And slapping Mordred

• And then her ladies in waiting(?) pulling Mordred off Genny

Act 2, Scene 4: The trial/The Battle

• The staging of Guenevere also has burrowed itself into my brain

• It's so much more still than Fie on Goodness and the dread of that is so effective

• I don't even have the words for Andrew Burnap's performance, on some level he's not doing much as far as movement or expression as they wait for the verdict but also he's doing everything

• I would personally like a full commentary from the director and actor and writer so they can explain to me exactly what's going on in Arthur's head during this scene because damn so much is happening

• And everything you hear on the cast recording that he says is acted so well and intensely when you actually see it

• The way he grabs the paper after Pelli gives him the guilty news is a heartbreaker

• Mordred's glee just absolutely shining through and then the way he storms out once he's been banished

• Mordred walking up to the sword when Arthur draws it and taunting him about not being barbaric and when he puts it down, you think it worked and then

• Arthur fucking choking Mordred holy shit

• The dressing of Arthur in the armor which again is so quiet and simple but conveys the shift so well

• He's not a king making laws to improve the world anymore, he's a commander getting ready for war and his entire demeanor shows that

• We've heard of Arthur who's faced armies and glimpsed it slightly in the tournament but you finally get that his mind too comes with steel

• When the knights circle him and they all kneel and cross themselves

• Again just so somber like we all knew this story was not going to end well for these characters but you forget and here it finally clicks back in

Act 2, Scene 5: Outside Joyous Gard - on the eve of war

• Again an everyone's faces problem every moment of the scene

• Lance and Genny kneeling when they show up, like they've caused a whole damn war but they still gotta kneel before the king

• And obviously it's them but when they flip off the hoods, it's still a moment

• Arthur not looking at Genny when he says he'd burn her himself if it would stop the war

• Arthur and Lance saying their goodbye and then him walking off

• Genny falling to her knees when she begs to come back and die is unfair

• And then Arthur offering his hands and helping her up

• Arthur and Genny are in clear pain every single second and same

• Arthur looking at audience instead of Genny while he confesses his love

• And then they're standing facing the audience instead of each other while they have the whole discussion, until Genny finally reciprocates

• The pain on his face when he says that he's the king and she would have had to pretend

• Genny trying to leave and then when they look back at each other and run to each other

• The hug, it's such a good hug, they hold on so tight and it breaks me

• And then the kiss, romantic as hell

• Looking away from each other when she finally has to leave

• Arthur trying to get himself back under control

• And then the way his face shifts when he realized Tom has heard the stories of Camelot

• You can see on his face when he decides to tell Tom all the stories were true

• Arthur is very cute with Tom, leading him around under his arm when he says he's not ready in particular

• Then everyone remaining walking off stage is incredibly epic and triumphant and hopeful

[prt-razorfuck]

To: Piggot_BigBossLady_Real

From: MissBoomstick (written down by the lovely Intern #682 with complete and total accuracy, no liberties were taken with the scary gun ladies words ;)

Director Piggot,

Ma'am, here is the report on the Ward's conduct today. I am just as displeased as you are that this has to be a daily thing. No, the department of Legal Cut-throats and Miscreants still has not cleared corporal punishment, nor would my administration have the effect you intend ma'am. Especially on some of the more... spirited wards.

Ahem. Returning to the subject at hand, the usual problem children (Shadow Stalker and Clockblocker) are both still on console duty due to the "flying desk chair and buzzsaw throwing" incident they pulled. We are still investigating just why Shadow Stalker was attacking the Hebert family porch, but rest assured we expect to sweep ot under the rug vis threat of lawsuit soon enough.

A surprise issue this morning (which you are of course already aware of but we must be formal about these things) was Aegis deciding he wanted to know what the fuel oil Armsmaster's suits use taste like. It took Panacea a full hour to fix him, and he wanted to have another taste afterwards, I had to personally confoam him. Armsmaster has been ordered to rework the formula to be less "horrifically acidic and addictive, a hundred thousand times worse than opium, what the fuck, Armsmaster" end quote. I also took the liberty of telling Dragon what he'd been up to, ma'am. Both men are quite cowed by their house arrest. I was nice enough to let the four play Monopoly, though it quickly turned violent.

She isn't a ward just yet, but Glory Girl was found high and raiding a grocery store around 1pm today. Luckily, her mother was around and could handle it. She's currently getting the grandmother of all lectures while she nurses the food coma resulting from a Brute refueling.

Vista... Well, I'm very proud of her, for one. She knew exactly what to do and did it perfectly, textbook example of pistol marksmanship. She fucking shot Kaiser in the balls. He didn't notice, thank God, and I got her disarmed and out of there, but we need to give her another "reasonable force" talk. Not me, you know I think it's a load of crap. I make all of the guns, it's my literal god given ri- excuse me. I get... Testy about the full use of my power and it's origin. Vista did keep the glock, for the record. We now have a spacetime breaking middle schooler with a gun on our hands.

Panacea: got caught cackling and watching zombie movies while doing something ghastly with frozen beef. Not anything Nilbog-like, cause I'd have capped the bitch right then and there, law bedamned. She likes to play with her food and shape her beef into dinosaurs and play with them like dolls. Ma'am, we desperately need a way to get that kid therapy. (AN: it's an AU Pan-Pan can work with dead material to a limited extent by puppetting it with growths of bacteria. Which she then eats. God, and I thought the goblin cum was bad)

Kid Win: is still not winning at life. Turned a toothbrush into a confoam grenade and "forgot" it in Calvert's office bathroom. He actually forgot it, I watched the security footage. It was stuck to his back when he helped Calvert carry some boxes into his office, but wasn't when he left after borrowing the bathroom. Still technically had to punish him by making him clean and sort his workshop. I gave Vista a power washer set on low to watch him and make sure it gets done.

The others were pretty bland. Gallant is still a rotting corpse that we apparently pay Panacea to puppet to bolster our ranks after the poor idiot met a grisly end. I'm not going to think about why the corpse is still dating Glory Girl. I'm not... Ma'am, we may need more than therapy for Panacea and Gallant. Am I still not allowed a flamethrower indoors?

[diaperdrysuitdrone1950]

BERMUDA TRIANGLE DIVE

BERMUDA TRIANGLE DIVE

By cookie monster 82801 (first draft)

It has been a year since the private jet went missing. They narrowed down the location based on the last signals heard from the craft. Extensive searches of the area turned up nothing.  It was assumed that it ran out of fuel and slipped into the deep abyss.  It would be like finding that missing needle in a haystack.  

We were about to dive in the area for other reasons. Predive briefing told us about the missing craft and alerted us to have an open eye in case we happen to see a needle.

 Aaron was the lead diver going down. His Kirby dive helmet was equipped with communication equipment so he could talk with the surface.  He was on an umbilical line.   I was his back up diver.  I was instructed to go check it out when suddenly communications with him had been cut off.  I descended down following the umbilical line.  I did casually check my surrounding area to assure there were no sharks or other predators that may complicate the dive.   But I was heavily focused on the line and in a hurry to assure Aaron’s safety.  

I stared and could not believe my eyes as Aaron came into my sight.  Suddenly, out of nowhere, they were upon me.  They seemed to know what they were doing as they yanked my communication loose before I could warn the surface about what I was seeing.  I got another glance of Aaron, and the fight was on.  

 Who ever they were, I was no match for them.  It did not take them long until I was looking at Aaron restrained and in the same situation, he was in.  I moved my head from side to side and Aaron responded doing the similar motion.  At least he was still alive.  We were both helpless.  All we could do is wonder what would happen next.  The terror of our predicament began to set in.  Our umbilical cords could be cut at any moment.  Who ever our attackers were could also be attacking our crew on the surface.  

A sense of calm came over me as I accepted my total helplessness in this situation.  I thought to myself that if they intended to kill us, we would not be living now.  All I would be able to do was wait this out and see where it would go.

Initially, I focused on Aaron.  He also seemed to be calm in his powerless.  He was in this predicament longer than I had been.  

My thoughts turned to our families and friends and how they would react to us being gone.  This was probably going to hurt them as much or even more in some circumstances.  

I changed my focus back to fighting this.  Fighting this for my friends and family.  I tested each and every restraint that they had me in. I struggled until I realized it was futile.  I looked over at Aaron who by now had already accepted the futility of any struggle.  Aaron managed to give me the okey signal which I returned.  

Our captures came back too us.  I could see 3 of them working on Aaron.  Initially we both tried our best to resist as our umbilical was disconnected.  I thought to myself that it would not be very long now.  But then surprisingly our captures connected us to a new umbilical.

“WE WANT YOU TO JOIN US!”  Was the first words that came over my ear piece.  

“Can I speak with Aaron?”  was my first reply.

“I can hear ya!”  Aaron responded.  

The joy of hearing his voice again caused a flood of tears that I could not wipe away.  Where ever we were headed at least we would have each other.  

  Chapter 2 BERMUDA TRIANGLE DIVE

I thought back on how Aaron and I first met as dive buddies in dive school.  He was not afraid to be dive buddies with the ‘faggot’ in our class.  That faggot being me.  While the school could not discriminate based on preference, my classmates had no legal obligation to accept me.  

I could not hide who I was, ‘my preferences’, from the school.  They would do a background check and be able to discover it with little or no effort. I was very open about who I was even back to my high school years.  Also, I did not need any ‘secrets’ that could be used against me.  They could not block me from the school for being gay but they could if I was a liar.  

Aaron was a straight guy who never believed in discrimination.  He shared that he had misgivings as he stood up for what he believed in.  He feared retribution for his stand.  At the time he stood up for me, our country had been in a rebound of rage from the far right.  Bigots were emboldened by many who gave them more legitimacy and power then they warranted.  But Aaron felt he needed to stand up for what he felt was right.  He indicated he thought as a fellow human being I had as much right to be a diver as he did.  

Based on diving and several other mutual interests, Aaron and I developed a close friendship.  We camped out with each other and often took long hikes in the mountains.  During football season we both had a brew and were clued to the same big screen.  Once I even got tickets for us to see a Vikings vs. Green bay Christmas game at US Bank stadium.  I was a Viking fan and he was a cheese-head.  He shared that it was one of the best Christmas presents he ever had. Unfortunately for me, the Vikings came up short on the final score.

I mused with him About his name being Aaron like Aaron Rodgers.  “We are probably both named after Hank Aaron!”  He replied. “I was born shortly after he broke the Babes record!”

I made it clear to Aaron that I would not resist if he ever wanted to “DO ME”.  I also indicated I owed him head anytime he was interested, for all that he had done for me. He clearly understood how hot I thought he was.  He took that as one of the highest compliments that I could give to him.  He accepted my feelings for him, but it never went any further.  

He was HOT!  There was always an interested lady in his life.  But for some reason, he never made any commitments. He even shared with me how much he wanted to become a daddy someday.  I could picture how he would be a good loving daddy to some kid someday.   Many times, our diving careers took him away from any long-term relationships.   About the time he was ready to pop the question on a beautiful lady, he was headed around the world on a dive assignment.

Chapter 3 BURMUDA TRIANGLE DIVE

It was clear to me that we would not be going to the surface anytime soon.  The new umbilical cords we were attached to went down and ran along the floor of the ocean.

“CAN WE DO THIS WITHOUT FORCE?”  

I looked over at Aaron.  We both looked at the overwhelming number of divers that were now surrounding us.  

“What do ya think buddy?”  I asked Aaron.  It all seemed futile to me but I was willing to follow whatever action Aaron wanted to take.

“We got on other option!”  Aaron replied.  “They got us by the umbilical and they got us outnumbered.”  

I was not certain if Aaron was just saying that to get out of the restraints or if he meant it.  I was prepared to put up a battle to our death also if Aaron initiated one.  

“We will comply with you as long as we can see each other and as long as you do not harm us!”  Aaron indicated to our captures. “You on board with that?”  Aaron asked me.  I just signaled OK.  

“WE WISH YOU NO HARM.  WE WANT YOU TO JOIN US NOW!”

The captures began to release the restraints.  They rubbed where they had applied the restraints and gave us the ‘okay’ signal which we returned.  They now began to check with us frequently to assure we were ok. Someone was gathering up the umbilical as we moved in the direction of the source of our air.  As we moved along, my eye caught sight of some wreckage. There were some older ships and then I spotted the aircraft that was recently missing.  

I was puzzled about what kind of dive equipment they had.  Occasionally I could see bubbles go to the surface from them as they exhaled.

It looked as if we were swimming into an underwater cliff. Lights came on as we were about to reach a black hole.  We followed the white light and the cord. We seemed to swim horizontally thru a cave and suddenly we were in a much larger open area where we surfaced into an underground air bubble.  We swam on the surface over to a platform along the wall.  They assisted us to a standing position on the lower platform that was waist deep under the surface of the water.  

Tenders were now surrounding us and removing our helmets and fins.  Once the helmets and fins were off, we were assisted to an upper dryer dock. They helped us to stand on the upper dry dock. We were instructed to remove the rest of our suits.   We could go no further with anything we had before. We had to get completely naked.

I glanced over at Aaron much like I had done before in the locker rooms we had been in.  I thought about how sick a mind I must have to be able to drool over him at a time like this.  Aaron Just smiled and winked indicating he knew where my head was at.  I noticed that my ‘lust’ indicator was on the rise.  

We somehow overheard that our ‘empty suits’ would be brought back and connected to the original umbilical cords we started the dive with. Our mates on the surface would have no way of explaining our disappearance when they pulled our suits from the water.  Just one more disappearance in the Bermuda Triangle.

[guytheporn]

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[ash-the-porcupine]

SCRIPT #3: (OVER TEXT MESSAGES)

Ash: Alright motherfluffers, today's we must complete our mission of naming this group chat. Ash: Because we've been trying and failing for seven months. Ash: It help if someone would DRAG ON MOON'S FLUFFY BUTT TO THE DANG THING- Meena: …That image has scarred me. Meena: Like, for life. Johnny: Agreed. But you're right, Ash, we need a nameeee Nooshy: ISIS. Porsha: But that's a terrorist group- Rosita: It's also an Egyptian god, honey. Ash: …how the hell is that related to this group chat- Porsha: It isn't! But it's fun! Ash: *GROAN* Miss Crawly: How about Chaos Incarnate- Rosita: I mean, it's accurate. Gunter: We should like totally involve missiles- Ash: Why? Gunter: Just because! Porsha: Maybe the Group of Drunk Morons. Rosita: SERIOUSLY? Rosita: I- I give up. Nooshy: The Cult of Rule Breaking? Rosita: Rules aren't meant to be broken. Nothing is. Gunter: Glowsticks, spaghetti when you have a small pot- Ash: Eggshells, piñatas- Johnny: Laws. Nooshy: Rules. Rosita: Johnny, should I be concerned? Johnny: My dad is an gang-leader, Rosita- Rosita: …okay you win. Miss Crawly: The League of Theatrical Clumsiness- Porsha: Where did that even come from- Johnny: Mr. Moon slipped down three flghts of stairs yesterday and somehow landed in a box of costumes. It's a safe bet that's why. Ash: Crawly, would you drag the fluffy idiot onto here? Rosita: Fluffy idiot- lol Ash: He's a fluffy idiot. No denials. Ash: But he's OUR fluffy idiot so I'll take it. Meena: Oh! That reminds me for some reason- Meena: Mr. Moon came to eat with me and my family this week. Meena: And my mom asked him how many kids he had… Meena: And his answer was "Biologically, legally, or emotionally?" Rosita: AW- that's actually adorable. Ash: Did he ever say how many emotional kids he had- Ash: DOES HE HAVE ANY REAL KIDS WE DON'T KNOW ABOUT- IS MOON HIDING A CHILD FROM US- Buster: I can assure you I am not hiding any kids from you, Ash. Ash: THERE YOU ARE-! Porsha: You were gone forEVER! Buster: It hasn't been THAT long- Buster: Only two months. Rosita: No it's been three. Rosita: Because the last time you were on was the day you lost a bet and had to send us a video of you breakdancing. Buster: Fine. Buster: I wasn't that bad though- Ash: You were admittedly decent until you slipped and broke your arm. Ash: Moron. Buster: You know you love me. Ash: I won't deny it. Buster: You guys still haven't found a name? Gunter: It's like totally impossible! Porsha: It really is! We can't think of anything decent! Buster: The Cult of Insanity. Ash: That- fair enough. The theater family's cult of insanity. I'll take it. The rest of you? *after a few minutes, it is decided and they all agree* Ash: LEZZ GOOOOOO WE HAVE A NAME NOW MOTHER FLUFFERS.

[fangirlinglikeabus]

In the first place, the man who has had the assurance to think me, and to endeavour to make me, his property, will hunt me from place to place, and search after me as an estray: and he knows he may do so with impunity; for whom have I to protect me from him?

would like to highlight this bit from clarissa especially because i have both tenant of wildfell hall and caleb williams brainrot and i think you could reasonably argue that both of them were influenced by this book. anyway i think this is super telling re: richardson’s broader societal concerns and the way he’s torn as a writer between ‘hey, the world really sucks for women’ and the more conservative ‘...but you should still totally obey your father isn’t patriarchy great?’ like, i’m pretty sure his solution is just to try and didactic-novel-write men into being better power holders rather than question the power that enables these abuses in the first place. we’ve kinda got both bound up here - the acknowledgement that if clarissa were to marry lovelace she would be functionally owned by him, and that he has absorbed that ideology into his broader attitude about women, is certainly present, but there’s also the fact that this comes in the middle of clarissa deciding she needs to sacrifice the hope of being reconciled with her family; she’s vulnerable to him not just because of legal status but because if she had a good patriarchal family structure behind her she’d never even have to worry about dangerous men in the first place! the person who should be protecting her, the ‘whom’, is her father, and he’s failed at that.

i looked up the word estray in the glossary at the back of my edition, too, and it said this:

(in law) A tame beast found, having no known owner, which if not claimed within a year and a day falls to the lord of the manor.

a metaphor which has it All: dehumanisation, lovelace’s need for himself to be the ultimate power in any given situation, the idea in tameness of a creature that has lost its natural ability to defend itself, falls. but also - it’s a legal term. and this is i think the other element of that line i bolded that both caleb williams and tenant seize upon, which is that this is legally sanctioned mistreatment. ‘whom have i to protect me from him?’ well it’s not the law. that was never there to protect you; you’re equivalent to a tame beast. that’s the weapon behind falkland throwing caleb in prison, hunting caleb even though he’s the criminal; it’s what allows arthur huntington to destroy helen’s art supplies and take what little money she has. they have rank, money, and gender on their side regardless of the rightness of their actions. and while i do think clarissa is a more conservative work than either of those subsequent novels, it’s far from impossible to notice a similar critique, or at least uneasiness, about the systems at play in the world richardson is writing.