#fuck c!george tho

[furrysmp]

decided for giggles to see what dsmp has been up to in the. Two and a half years since I last looked

Anyways so canon is trashfire but the part of me that started sunbringer in dsmp is now stirring to make More stuff. Like a "the universe reset thing but dream is still in prison so it doesn't reach him" thing that I'm trying to remove from brain bc I actually didn't do the catching up via vods and instead looked at fandom reaction for instructions and uhm.

Yeah no I genuinely want to write this it's gonna be so interesting but also who even does dsmp anymore like is there an audience

[g-xix]

ArthurTV was a DIFFERENT BREED in this platform roulette 😭😭

Firstly like omg the pimp jacket bro litr stopped everyone from making edits using any clip from this video bc he's dressed like a pimp the entire time LMFAOO

Then also the way he got drunk so early from not drinking allat much was so funny but also cute in a way idk, just laughable behaviour seeing him with 0 social anxiety

Okay and then he just busts into spanish song????? Like i know he knows some Arabic but reciting a whole ahh Spanish song so tone deaf - i was not expecting ANY of that 😭😭

Adding onto 0 social anxiety like, im still watching the vid n he's just started chanting WANKER at a fan that's j come to get a free pint from them bc she couldn't chug it 😭😭😭 I love this he's actually off the rails

Also I love some of Arthur Hill's music (honestly only You're Not a God, you're just a girl) but the shoving in of John Wayne is uncharacteristic to the video i wont lie i do not fuck w the vibes unfortunately 😔

OH DEARY ME HANG ON IVE JUST GOT TO THE PRESUMABLY LAST SCENE WHERE THEY'RE ON THE BRIGHTON BEACH BUT GEORGE IS IN HIS BOXERS JFC BRO HE IS VERY EXPOSED ON YOUTUBE FUCKING HELL.

also tho

a) yay another chance to see Arthur Televisions abs 🫣😛 b) George's tee-shirt tan liens are awful omg 😭😭 c) GEORGE'S LEG MUSCLES + GLUTES ARE FUCKING WILD PROPS TO HIM FOR ESTABLISHING SUCH A THRIVING BAKERY.

another 10/10 smash video (ofc biased bc bbg bach and arthur were in it again but who rly cares, my whole page is based off of loving ATV)

[calholic]

Hiii I just LOVE your writing sm omfgg ,hope your having a lovely day rn because rn I'm stuck in a fucking train station in Paris and it's like 92848482°c (help) sooo it gaves me an idea for a request 😇☝️

2007/2008 Tom x fem reader , in a train station like it could be a yn that missed her train and is desperately waiting for an another train then Bam , Tom is traveling with Bill, Gustav and Georg and he see her and just find her super hot and pretty u know , even tho YN is literally a mess idkkk just yeah I trust you ,do whatever you what , you don't even have to do this one if you don't feel like it 😭😭

Love u !!

T. KAULITZ x READER

★ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: on a hot day in paris you meet a certain someone

★ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: none 😇

★ 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: hey girl sorry for the late reply but i hope you had a good time in paris 😘 ALSO FINALLY GOT THIS FIC OUTTTT hope you guys like it and hope you guys MISSED meeee kisses and hugs 😘

———————————————————————

you ran as fast as you could to the train doors, but they closed right as you made it. you were now stuck in the train station waiting 30 minutes for another one to show up. you took a seat on one of the benches in the station, wiping the sweat off your forehead as you processed what just happened. you leaned back on the bench and let out a sigh and closing your eyes. you were dehydrated, sweaty, sticky and frustrated all at the same time which made your situation even worse.

you sat, checking the clock every 3 seconds until finally a train showed up along with a group of boys. they all looked around your age and you couldn’t help but notice one of them was just your type. he was wearing the baggiest clothes you’ve ever seen and he had long, dark blonde locs. you brushed it aside since you had a train to catch and you were already late to where you were supposed to be. you took a seat near the door and the boys followed, taking the same train as you. they sat in the seats across from you and one of the boys, the one you doing attractive was staring right at you.

you were a sweaty mess so you got embarrassed about your current appearance since you didn’t look the best. you fixed your hair a bit and reapplied some lipstick, looking up at the boy who was now laughing at something his friend said. you thought he was laughing at you but you noticed he was blushing as well. he looked back over at you and you couldn’t help but blush too. his face was perfect and he looked like an angel, you noticed his lip piercing too which was totally hot. after a few minutes of awkward back and forth eye contact the train finally stopped at your destination. you were disappointed that you didn’t ask for his number or at least get his name.

———————————————————————

before you left though, you heard the boys friends laugh and footsteps behind you. “hey, do you mind if i get your number?” the voice asked. you turned around to see the boy, “oh, uhm sure,” you said trying to hide your giant smile that was forming. you reached for his phone and your hands touched which made your face red and hot. “here, i’m actually late to work so i guess i’ll see you around,” you said handing his phone back to him. “oh, sure,” he said before sitting back down, you were smiling from ear to ear as you walked out of the train.

you talked to your friend alyssa at work about what had just occured. “you will not believe what just happened on the train,” you said to her. “did you meet your prince charming?” she asked. “kind of…” you said. she immediately looked up from her phone and raised an eyebrow. “tell me more,” she said. “okay well i missed the train and sat around waiting for another one and then when the other one came a group of boys showed up and hopped on the same train as me,” you explained. “then, i saw this really cute boy and we made eye contact, but didn’t say anything until the train stopped. i was obviously disappointed but then he asked for my number, i had to leave though so we didn’t talk much,” you finished explaining, catching your breath.

“when is it my turn?” alyssa asked before you heard your phone ring. it was a text message from the train boy. “i think he just texted me,” you said. “let me see,” alyssa said, scooting closer to you. “hey i’m tom, the guy from the train earlier. i was wondering if you’d like to get dinner with me sometime,” read the text message. you gasped as alyssa read it out loud. “say yes!” she said, pushing the phone towards you. “okok! this is so exciting,” you giggle before responding. “hey tom, i’m ______. is tonight good?” you replied. “you sound so formal,” alyssa said laughing while looking at your phone. “i’m nervous okay?!” you replied with a defensive but relaxed tone.

———————————————————————

once work had ended you and tom decided on going to your favorite restaurant near your apartment. you gave him a call to let him know that you would be waiting for him before you rushed to get ready. your heart was beating fast as you hopped in the shower, beginning to scrub your hair of all sweat and grease from the subway. you began to daydream about the date and would you would say to this complete stranger, making scenarios about how things could go, like what if i get food stuck in my teeth or what if he doesn’t like your personality. you got got carried away as you realized the time. “shit!” you exclaimed loudly before reaching for your towel and already putting your dress on before you were even dry.

you hurriedly curled your lashes and applied on mascara, making a mess all around your eye. you it up and added some finished touches before putting on some lipstick. looking at the mirror, you felt confident with the hard work and preparation for tonight. you took a deep sigh and smiled before searching for your phone which started ringing. it must’ve been tom telling you he was here since you heard a honk outside. you grabbed your phone and opened the, almost forgetting your purse. you looked up and there he was, waiting for you. he had walked out of his car and stood by the passenger seat just open the door for you.

not wanting to keep him waiting, you quickly ran over to him with a big smile on your face. “good to see you again, tom,” you said as he opened the door. “my pleasure,” he replied with a slight flirt in his tone before quickly making it back to the drivers side. the drive was a bit silent at first but you decided to crack some conversation. “so, are you from here?” you asked. “well actually no. i’m just uh, visiting you could say,” he said a bit nervously. you were off put by that but decided to ignore it since you wanted to keep the spark going. the restaurant wasn’t far from your place so it didn’t take long for tom to find it. he quickly rushed out the car after he airier to open your door which you thought was super cute of him.

“you’re such a gentleman,” you said chuckling, looking in his eyes. “only the best for you pretty lady,” he replied before winking, which immediately gave you butterflies. your face got red and hot as you started blushing and you could tell he noticed too by the accomplished smirk on his face.

———————————————————————

you guys got sat quickly and got to talking, you bringing up what he does for a living first. “well i play guitar in a band,” he said. “that’s amazing! i’ve always wanted to learn. what’s your bands name?” you asked. “tokio hotel,” he replied quickly, somewhat avoiding the question. “you guys popular?” you asked. “i guess you could say that,” he dryly responded. you thought it was a little weird that he didn’t want to talk about it but ignored it anyway since you didn’t want to pry and make him uncomfortable.

the waiter came with the menu and everything looked amazing as you two browsed. “i think i’ll have the pasta, what about you?” you asked, looking up at the menu to him. “the steak looks amazing,” he said. “alright then,” said the waiter as he grabbed the menus. “so what about you, what do you do?” tom asked. “well it’s not as exciting as whatever you do. i work an office job,” you said awkwardly slightly embarrassed as you laughed it off. “there’s nothing wrong with that,” he said sweetly, smiling at you.

his kindness was warm, comforting in a way. you were used to being treated mediocrely in all your past relationships so this was something to get used to. “where do you work?” he asked. “i work at ______ company, the buildings actually right there,” you said, pointing to a nearby skyscraper. the waiter arrived shortly with your food and the pasta looked mouth watering along with tom’s steak. the two of you started digging and with the first bite you fell in love immediately. “this is amazing!” you exclaimed, mouth still full of noodles. tom chuckled, looking at you with pure adoration as the candlelight gleamed in his eyes. you felt embarrassed as you covered your mouth and apologized for the rude outburst.

“mind if i have a bite?” tom asked. “go ahead,” you said, now wiping the pasta sauce off your lips. you pushed the plate his way as he lifted his fork. his face lit up as he tried it, looking as if he had fallen in love with the taste. “it really is amazing, you have good taste,” he said. “thanks,” you said shyly, letting out a little giggle. after dinner was over, tom walked you to the car and as he did you noticed a mob of people outside along with bright camera flashes from what you guessed as paparazzi?

———————————————————————

“why would paparazzi be here?” you mumbled to tom over the loud screams and yells. “uh- i have no idea, that’s strange. maybe there’s a celebrity here,” he said. “TOM!! I LOVE YOU!!!” you heard a voice shout from the crowd. you thought it was strange they were shouting the name of you date and you looked over to tom. “are they cheering for you?” you asked confused. “it couldn’t be, probably just a guy with the same name,” he said. “I LOVE TOKIO HOTEL!!” shouted another voice. “hey isn’t that the name of your ban-” you were cut off with tom dragging you by the hand to his car before you could finish your sentence.

“hey what gives?!?” you asked as he placed you gently but hurriedly in the car. you had so many questions at this point it didn’t seem like they would be answered soon. tom quickly got into the drivers seat and started the car, speeding away. he was silent the ride back to your house and the awkwardness of the car ride made you uncomfortable. when he parked outside your place, the two of you sat in silence for a while. “look i-“ he stared before you cut him off. “what just happened? why were all those girls screaming your name and your bands name? and why were there paparazzi? why did you run away so fast? i have so many questions,” you said shaking a little. tom let out a sigh, “i might’ve lied a little bit about the popularity of my band,” he said nervously.

“go on,” you said. “and i may or may not be here for said bands tour,” he continued. you let out a big sigh as you leaned back and closed your eyes. “why though? i mean i don’t mind if you’re some huge celebrity, it just would’ve been nice to know,” you said. “i understand and i’m sorry but i just thought you would get turned off by that. i really like you after all and i didn’t want to scare you away,” he said with a worried expression on his face as he looked at you. “i really like you too tom, and it’d take more than that to scare me away,” you said opening your eyes and turning to face him, a big smile growing on your face. “is that so?” he said with a mischievous grin, looking down at your lips. “oh?” you questioned.

———————————————————————

before you could say anything, tom quickly pounced on you. you were caught by surprise as the two of you locked lips but you went along with it. his lips were warm but hands warmer as you felt them glide against your cheek, immediately giving you butterflies. he began moving down to your neck before you stopped him. “let’s move this upstairs yeah?” you asked. “ok but i can’t guarantee i can hold myself back that long,” he said. your face felt warm as your cheeks turned red. tom carried you all the way upstairs into your building and you quickly unlocked your door before shutting it just as fast.

he placed you gently onto your bed and picked up where he left off. that night was one of your best and before you knew it the two of you were asleep, arms tangled together. you woke up first from the mixture of sunlight and the sweet chirps of birds. you looked over to see tom, shirtless but you were too. sitting up, you noticed your clothes scattered all on the floor. you got up to pick them up before you felt comforting, warm hands reach for your waist, it was tom. “where are you going?” he asked with a soft whine but deep morning voice before pulling you into his arms. “relax i’m just cleaning the mess we made last night up,” you giggled as he tickled you with kisses. “nghm that can wait,” he softly whispered as you grasped onto your body tightly.

[rainbowgod666]

Wizardposting blogs and my view of them, OR:

My ass out here cataloguing wizards like they're pokemon 💀 i ran out of things to do fr 💀💀💀

@official-megumin: dutch (EDIT. SHE ISNT. I WRONGLY REMEMBERER A POST OF HERS. I KNOW HER ASS IS LIVING [OR FROM] NORTH EUROPE THO) megumin that still has the "only knows one spell and its the stupidest and hardest to unlock and use. Balancing the Meta my ass" problem. In a relationship with @a-sentient-cup

@autism--wizard: just a lil neurodivergent guy that likes spooders. Not much of it really. Possibly strong enough to defeat spiders georg

@the-adhd-sorcerer: moot :) also more powerful than they let on, but its like DBXV2: starter gear and GODLY stats

@mossy--wizard: moss-fueled neurodivergent boi with lots of moss. Yes their blog feels like a wet forest in the sunlight, drying up after a long rain. Not really interacted with them tho...

@wizard-council-bureaucrat: basically the MC of tumblr wizardposting. If they say something its either wizard law or just a suggestion. Probably the only wizard here that ISNT "surprisingly powerful even though their learning was less than advanced"

@wizard-intern: the blorbo.

@the-gnomish-bastard: ok i get that theyre basically pilaf from dragonball, but A: the stew arcanum is REAL bur the 24 gods thing either sounds like bullshit or he made a stew out of 24 REALLY HUBRIS-FILLED PEOPLE (which would explain his "holy fucking shit how are you even capable of HAVING A STRUCTURE WITH THE FUNCTION OF A BRAIN"), B: he was the dude that came up with the whole "floating wizard island thing" (which has so many holes like wtf put it back down) and C: im pretty sure they have been corrupted by some kind of mushroom deity, which would explain the fact that when calling him "stupid" its like SCP-682 saying that humans are disgusting. Because there literally isnt a stronger word in the human language. How in the fuck does someone have so little intellect we have to do like the jewish population of europe after 1945 when they came up with the word "shoah" to describe what happened to them. To the user running that blog. GET SOME PSYCHIATRIC HELP ASAP. Holy shit.

@not-a-suspicious-wizard: "I aM vErY tRuStWoRtHy" dude everyone knows you wanna do some weird "subjugate reality" bullshit. How about you start making drafts and NOT murdering opponents? Seriously dude if you wanna be in charge as long as you dont try weird "consolidating power like its the 1940s" shit its alright. Maybe take some craftmanship things as a hobby! Make your own throne! Come up with something to do when you are too tired to do Dominant King Bullshit! Play modded minecraft/terraria! Make origami! If youre gonna blanket the world in darkness, at least make it look cool and welcoming instead of "inevitable rebel uprising lol have fun with Prophetic Children lmao" :3

@incompetent-wizard: are you SURE youre incompetent? Chances are, you're just unlucky 😊

[supermaks]

I need Max to serve some cunt bc it's been wayyy too long. The last time he really served cunt was when he called George a dickhead but I need moree

😑😑😑😑 👍🏽 ok respectfully we love a good Baku cat fight but like

- excuse me

- literally the next race

- Checo was telling media both Max’s titles happened because of him somebody out there was floating Prost senna conversations people lost their whole minds like 😭😭

-first of all quali didn't even start great like he hadn't set a lap when it got red flagged kind of Amateur hour at rbr. last time u will c number 1 car go out late btw he’s fully traumatized these days he’s breaking front wings hauling ass out of that garage god bless him. Anyway p9 wid his hyped up teammate starting on pole the casuals were celebrating even tho max was doing like. borderline unthinkable laps in fp2 so u could smell a generational moment from the get go

-dude overtook like literally everybody on hards by like lap 15 i think and still had all four wheels somehow spinning faster than checos fresh mediums by lap 40

- Destroying ur teammates entire wdc campaign in a single race weekend on hard tires from p9 kinda cunty idk?. To me

- Ok fine then Monaco: Jeddah won the battle but he won the war. made up 2 tenths in one of the shortest sectors of the whole calendar in prolly one of the best and most competitive quali sessions in Monaco, ever. Senna type performance, just fully letting the talent take over rascasse and antony noghes. U cannot serve more cunt than that

- Non? Bon. Spain: black and white flag for track limits. His engineer tells him he’s stupid and Max is like 'whatvr what’s the fastest lap' and his engineer is like 'SORRY did u not hear what I just' and max steals fastest lap from Checo. Who btw had just set that on new softs for his flop lil point and Max leading by 24 seconds at risk of getting a pen wid gp warning him against it is like 😚😚😚😚😚bet . This isn’t cunt to u. Ok

- FINE. Canada: do I have to talk about senna again😐. Do I have to say he equaled sennas wins at 25 years old. But despite the Senna numbers it was also an eerily Schumacheresq quali session from Max. Taking pole by a second under the rain is something u c twice, maybe once in a lifetime, if ur lucky. We are lucky 🫵🏽

- Austria: u look at me rn and tell me Austria wasn’t the most 2021 max you’ve seen that mf since that actual season. U tell me he didn’t serve cunt nearly sending both Red Bulls to eat shit at the RED BULL ring because he was a lil annoyed checo dared to like. Squeeze him a lil bit. Nearly overtaken by an Haas i cannot stress this enough. Bro Lewis impeded him once by accident during practice and Max literally twerked in front of his car and got away wid it. And on top of that he gaslit rbr into letting him pit for softs and risk the whole race to take one single extra point like he wud rather fucking die than let anybody else have it. He’s beating merc in the THE FONSTRCUTORS CHAMPIONSHIP‼️‼️‼️‼️ HES 1 PERSON

- .

- Austria was such fucking prime Verstappen cunt delivry it was so dumb and all of it completely unnecessary and ur fucking telling me he hasn’t really ‘served’ because he doesn’t have some tall beans and toast bitch up in his face like

- Which obvi brings me to Silverstone: HE WON THE BRITISH GP HE literally won the British Grand Prix???? Half a million people praying on his downfall, mclaren having its own lil moment he doesn’t give a fuck 5 poles and 6 wins in a row on ur head fucking losers eat it. Eat ittt. 2023 has been nonstop cunt serving from this guy it’s literally one of thee greatest verstappen performances to date put some respect on it immediately . Thank u

[effervescentdragon]

If you want contreversy then roast every driver 🔥 🔥 🔥 show no mercy

Charles - too pretty, Stockholm-syndromed, airhead

Carlos - too hot, has a much higher opinion of his prowess than is realistic, daddy issues that make freuds dick chafed

Lewis - much bitchier than he likes to pretend he is, cringe but free

George - inferiority complex, wants to be called a good boy more than anything else

Alex - a red bull bastard boy hiding it all under a nice smile and hence fooling everyone

Lando - insecurity covered by entitlement

Oscar - entitled as fuck and it shows

Pierre - thinks he has a big dick, literally and metaphorically, does he tho

Fernando - walking red flag, probably clinically insane

Checo - doesnt know how to drive

Lance - doesnt know how to drive

Esteban - french

Sebastian - cant name his kids but can sure af name all his cars in chronological, alphabetical, and order of personal preference

Jenson - got the wdc by luck of the draw

Nico - pretty perfect principality princess

Mick - mid at best

Mark - pathetic

Daniel - pathetic

Yuki - perfect in every way

Max - tits should be bigger

Valtteri - should drink more coffee

Liam - C likes him so he must be a lesbian

Zhou - only other one serving fashion to peasant masses who lack understanding

Haas - washed up never-have-beens

Logan - from fucking Florida

[bigmack2go]

Ayyo this fandom need some good news for once in a while and since i was sharing hc‘s anyway, i‘ll be so generous

(All of these are about the c!character! None of these are about the content creators or shipping real people!!)

-Tubbo taught ranboo how to walz

-Tubbo would be super grumpy in the morning

-Fundy had an emophase

-Allyssa left because people have lost so many cannon lifes at such young age where they were and she wanted to live somewhere save and normal. She was super important to dream. So the reason he would’ve gone as far as he did and so much further to bring “peace” to the smp, was so he could convince allyssa to come back.

-Techno has schizophrenia (is this canon?)

-Sapnap is like alyssas sister

-Niki helps fundy raise yogurt

-Hannah and george are siblings

-Tina and karl are siblings

-Max and purpled are brothers

-Punz and alyssa are siblings und purpled and max’s older siblings

-Tubbo would wear Karls clothes all the time

-Skeppy and jack r siblings

-Sometimes (just sometimes) tubbo would call philza dad or dadza (on accident???) and he didnt know how to feel about it but he let it slide

-Tubbos eyes r pink bc he inherited albinism from puffy

-Karl has the tism

-Everyone in the syndicate had greek mythology god code names

-Michael has an eyepatch !!!

-Tommy has adhd (duh)

-Tubbo has adhd-authism

-Sapnap has borderline

-Bipolar w!lbur (fuck wilbur soot btw)

-Q has bpd and borderline

-Karl and Ranboo are siblings.

-Ranboo and tina went apart in a huge fight (similar to quackitys and karls) because he forgot her. They didnt have contact at all for years until karl made them bc he was sick of always having to make sure to not talk about the other sibling. They’re still having trouble but they do their best trieng to be better and get closer again.

-Narcissistic schlatt

-Noone ever questioned whether foolish was puffies biological son even tho shes a sheep and no one in her fam has shark genes

-Yogurt being all white has nothing to do with him being born in snowchester, it’s because dream is his biological dad and Puffy‘s albinism skipped a generation so he inherited it from dream.

-tubbos hair used to be malfoy-level pale blonde but he dyed it and dyes it darker woth every new trauma bc he wants to leave his old self, his past behind (doesn’t work lmfao)

[l-norris]

The second-to-last race before summer break has arrived, and yet again I have written down my own commentary, poking a little fun and trying to be funny I guess.

DISCLAIMER: Remember that this is just for shits and giggles, I'm not trying to actually hate on any of the drivers cuz all (most) of them are very dear to me!

Pre-race anxiety is strong

McLaren 1-2 start

Formation lap starts

Lando is hurrying through it

It's lights out and away we go!

Lando, Max and Oscar three-wide into turn 1

Max goes wide, rejoins in second

Lando bottles it once more (sigh)

Oscar is first

Max under investigation for leaving the track and gaining an advantage (3)

Checo in 18th rip

Max has to give the position back to Lando (4)

He's not happy

very aggressive

McLaren 1-2

First pitstops by Kevin, Alex and Esteban (7)

People are actually going for three-stops

very bold

Accidentally deleted the draft for this, had to start over (rip)

Oscar being told to save tires in lap 2 already help😭

They're just cruising along, saving tires (13)

"Lando, your race is with Verstappen"

Uh... yeah I sure hope so?😬

Fernando does not give a shit about what Lance does (so real) (15)

Pit window is open (16)

Lewis pits (17)

Lando pits (18)

Slight issues on front-left

Max complains (what a surprise)

Oscar pits (19)

Good stop

"Think about plan C" oh no Charlie, oh no no no😬

Just like old times

Max and Carlos pit (21)

Slow stop from Max

Checo is in 8th🤯 (22)

Charles first, yet to pit

Lewis fastest lap (23)

Charles pits (23)

Lando pulls away from Lewis (25)

Carlos is plowing through the field (26)

Quick PSA: Logan is not last!🎉

Oscar fastest lap (28)

Lewis falls back (28)

Checo, Pierre and Danny pit (29)

Fuck VCarb, all my homies hate VCarb

Charles fastest lap (30)

Yuki pits (30)

Max is in Lewis' DRS

George pits (34)

Pierre retires again after DNF-ing in Silverstone (34)

Lewis locks up, goes wide

Max passes

Max goes wide

Lewis passes

That was funny to watch

Lando gains on Oscar (36)

More complaining from Max

Lewis holds Max up so nicely (38)

Keep the scrap up boys :)

Even more complaining

"He sounds like a man who could've used a bit more sleep last night" HELP HAHAHAHA

Lewis and Charles pit (41)

Nothing is going Max' way apparently

McLaren strategists cooking?!

Lando pits (45)

2.3 second stop

Oscar pits (47)

McLaren don't fuck this up for Oscar I swear

...

Brother eugh

Nevermind McLaren strategists didn't cook AT ALL

massively overreacted to undercut Lewis tbh

McLaren want them to swap positions

Oscar almost bins it

Oh, Lando wants Oscar to work for it😵‍💫

Oh no, oh dear...

Max pits (50)

Red Bull fucked their strategy lmfao

Oscar catches up to Lando

"Lando radio check please" LMAO PLS

Temporary moment of deafness

Max is grumpy

Oh jeez

"Multi-21, anyone?" Crofty please😭😭😭

10 laps to go

McLaren are playing the emotional card now

Fuck you McLaren

Honestly yeah Lando, you're right, Oscar should catch up if he wants the win /hj

Max locks up

divebombs Lewis

and goes flying

Mad Max is back (63)

Rejoins in fifth... so lost everything he made up

GP scolds Max like a toddler😬

Max under investigation again (after the race tho) (67)

And the McLaren boys finally swapped😮‍💨(68)

This 1-2 is so, so bittersweet

The strategy ruined it for me

But hey!

Oscar won!

McLaren 1-2, but at what cost?

I need some strong liqueur and a cigarette after all this

At least Lando doesn't seem too upset about it

I hope this won't have consequences for them

Well, they both seem pretty high-spirited

I think we're good

So unusual to not have Max on the Podium podcast /hj

Oscar protecting his trophy from Lando😭 pls they're so goofy

Champagne Pop is back baby!

... feel free to add on :)

... This race subtracted multiple years off my lifespan. Fuck VCarb for ruining Dannys race, fuck McLaren and their strategy for ruining the 1-2 for us.

Also, important PSA since I've seen some negative stuff about the whole teamorder thing from McLaren:

Remember, don't blame either Oscar OR Lando for the drama, no matter what side you're on. This is totally on the team for fucking up the strategy once again.

Thank you for your attention, have a nice rest of your day :)

[j2zara]

my friend who isnt on starbreaker tumblr but is obsessed w the clones and jaceporter said that we should put the clones in a band so i have some ideas to run by you:

j2 on vocals and guitar, obviously. hes the songbird, he's the most talented out of them

j4 on bass. she gives off bass playing girlfriend vibes. bass players are also the ones who fuck the most <3

j3 on drums. relegated to the background as usual but the band wouldnt work w/o him

i'm fascinated to know there are people i will never meet who like the clones. Sad (for me) that ur friend isn't interested in joining the circle of perverts but as ppl who have nuclear launch codes to each others psyches i get it.

ANYWAY. The clones in a band. I've never put like thought thought into it but like the want literally crossed my mind like every fuckin day. I keep joking the Jaces (i think jaceprime should get in on it too!) should be in a band so that they can angrily sing The Chain at each other live. But YEAH this is such a good configuration.

J2 our little songbird!!!!!! And everyone is like "well in order to make it you just have to have some sort of It Factor and. Bluejay has the It Factor" (J3 is so so so fucking normal about this). Meanwhile people who are really into them are like "i get Bluejay is the artist but J4 is the secret sauce and the heartbeat that really makes all of it tick. She's the one who has real instincts about this stuff and really punches everything up. Without her they would be so generic and would not have the same longevity". (J3 is. Slightly better about this but is still so so so so so so so so so so fucking normal about this, too)

I think J2 and J4 get into a lot of fights about creative differences, even tho j2 is usually such a Goodboy this means so much to him and i do think he has a strong creative voice and J4's instincts are so the opposite. (in that. Her instincts are so Jade Victorious coded in that she wants to dump a bucket of stageblood on her audience). AND J2 doesn't do it on purpose but he's like. So so so so so so bad about parasocial boundaries. He's like. These are my friends who i love so so so much :'). We couldn't have done this without you. meanwhile J4 shaves her head and bleaches it and comes out in a wig like. "just kidding. I know how badly changing my appearance would disappoint my friends. Just kidding again. I'm not your friend and you have no say over what i do with my body" and is like. Honestly borderline hostile to the audience. (the people who like her are kinda into that tho)

Meanwhile J3 is such a workman. People ask "is J3 the best drummer in the world?" and J2 (if he's in a mood) is like "J3 isn't even the best drummer in the band". He's so Ringo Starr coded. In that he's weirdly popular but also nobody takes him seriously. However, he is extremely hot tho which somehow only makes him Lose Cred even more!!!! b/c people are like. Oh only stupid girls would only ever like J3. He's not a serious Artist. His hotness brings down the rep of the entire band which J4 pretends she doesn't care about even tho she wants to be taken seriously but J2 thinks is really annoying. But to be fair, J2 is the one who is concerned with being commercial.

And like. To be fair all of J3's songs are so Octopus's Garden coded but also if Octopus's Garden was not a children's song but maybe more about being on substances. But there is a subtext of like. It would be nice if everything was peaceful and everyone would get along :) in there

I also think like. there's like. j2j3 tension b/c j3 is annoyed b/c J4 is breathing into his mouth every night but like. Only seems to take J2 seriously as a collaborator. J3 can also be George coded if i say so. Paul / john love-hate relationship that broke up the band even tho ringo left first i love you i see you im sorry for talking so fucking much about the beatles i know thats so gouche but i think beatles lore is so funny and also when ppl are like "who would ever like the beatles" my base instinct is to go [john mullaney voice] my mommy so shut the fuck up! Stop calling my mommy dumb.... J3 is also ringo coded in that when there's nothing but constant conflict you start to worry that maybe you're the problem.

[milflewis]

hey i was wondering if you could do a blog rec list maybe? no pressure though! you just have good taste in drivers and shows and stuff imo and seem to know a lot of cool people here!

ah ofc! not really sure how to do these tho so sorry if it’s shit lol or if i forget anyone!

writer blogs

@hungerpunch valewis. dantteri. valtteri blog. lo’s writing has literally made me sit and stare at a wall before. @husbono sewis. smick. posts seb, lewis, mick, alex etc. i live for whatever genius edit idea natasha will bless us with next. @vettelsbitch maxiel. sewis. seb blog. every other month c comes into the gc like. guys. i had this idea for a fic and now i’ve slipped and accidentally written 10k. pls help. and it’s always the best thing ever. @rosyjuly smick. sewis. posts seb, lewis and mick. whenever i see that rosy has answered some fic prompt or smth and there’s a little readmore under the cut! pure delight i’m telling you. @thelittlebirdthatkeptsomanywarm sewis and slagclaren (will forever be grateful to a for writing a fic based on one of The lewis/jenson commercials). @traincoded also has written a slagclaren fic that filled the void of Another batshit insane commercial. @lewishamil10n valewis and sewis writer. always has the Correct Takes. @effervescentdragon sewis. brocedes. sebchal. charlos. pretty much whatever is poking at akira’s brain at that moment is what she is writing. @azzy421 mainly sewis. the writer of the lucky thirteen au! @trailsofpaper also mainly sewis. the writer of The sewis Knight au. @tinytauris and @yukierres are both doing god’s work filling the yukierre ao3 tag. @collarboen sewis and is also a miles/lewis truther! every single one of these writers have knocked me the fuck out with their writing. just saying.

artist blogs

@andreagrimes writer. also a valtteri blog and v v funny. their style of drawing is one of my fav. @russilton writer. george/lewis blog. mark also bullies kyle on main so like. follow him even just for that lol. @ilikecarsandlike4people and @storm3326 they both do v different kinds of doodles and art styles and i love them both

gifmakers

@ferrawri this is fran. if i loved her less i could talk about it more. posts daniel, lewis and motogp. mostly fabio and marc. @userhamilton posts seb, lewis, mick and lance mainly. has only one wrong opinion but that’s about the sebstache and i’ve given up trying to get ppl to see that light on that. @mickschumachergf posts v cool gifs of lewis and seb and mick etc. and is into fe! (also v funny and sometimes does these cool gif sets with subtitles or smth different and funky with them and they’re fantastic everytime). @formulaonedirection posts mainly lewis and lando. (her tags? genius and comical). @eliotheeangelis posts old f1. a godsend truly

editors/graphic makers

@queerbenched the funkiest graphics. @brawn-gp v v cool edits. @ivettel the most insane gif-editor i know. like half the time i’m like literally HOW are you doing this. fairly sure pure magic (and sooo much skill) is the answer. and writer and seb main. @yukierree v cool and colourful graphics and edits.

lewis blogs

@teamroscoes and @l8tof1 are The lewis blogs. @localoptimist and @lewishcmilton are v funny and have the best takes on things. @4405x sewis main. @sweetaswithscottymac also into fe! @vvettell also posts about seb and alex and fe! (also v funny and nice and i love seeing her takes on stuff)

seb blogs

@wdcseb also a writer! of the sebchal agenda. @unhinged-vettel v funny and really cool edits. @seblicha also v funny and chill

mick blogs

@princemick if you follow me you should definitely follow kyle lmao. at least just for context. they also make cool gifs and graphics too ig. @acrosstobear The Mick Blog . @mickbetsch the coolest gif-edits fr.

yuki blogs

@tsuchansworld and @tsu22 are both yuki blogs and are always correct. @lewki The yuki and lewis blog.

valtteri blogs

@eleyhsa and @garnetaldebaran are The valtteri blogs.

alex blogs

@raceweek her text posts never fail to make me laugh. @alxalb the funniest tags.

fe blogs

@sweetaswithscottymac also posts about lewis and indycar. @mickstart also has the Best michael schumacher takes and just takes in general. @andrelottering also a writer and i think into indycar too? (pls i’m so sorry if i’m wrong)

[lovecore-fics]

The Frenemy

C!sapnap x AFAB!reader

smut

warnings: pet names, degrading, breeding

a/n: this doesn’t go with lore characters but had the nations/kingdoms in it! (mentions of las Nevadas) 

You and dream had been “enemies” ONLY because dream is a sore loser.

For context: you and dream were gambling at las nevadas after hours because quackity let you guys occasionally. Dream ran out of diamonds so instead of diamonds he offered his sword. Nightmare. Obviously like every other round won and took his sword home. 

Ever since then he wouldn't let sapnap or george talk to you and he himself wouldn't talk to you.

Which is why you're sitting here looking at the text from sapnap.

Sapnap: y/n please come over. I need a favor

Why was this man texting YOU behind his bestfriends back for one little favor- 

You were thinking of so many things he would ask you to do for him you zoned out.

Apparently you're not allowed to think for a moment because a couple seconds later you got another notification.

Sapnap: y/n hurry tf up- its important!

While you were walking to the best friend's shared house you started wondering if it was a trap.

your mind was racing with the possibilities of what's gonna happen when you arrive, some possibilities were even dirty…

When you got to the house you noticed only sapnaps horse was there which made you less terrified.

You walked in the house since it was just sapnap but when you looked up nobody was there.

“Sapnap?” you called out. 

The minute you yelled his name you heard a thud come from his room. 

Sapnap suddenly appeared in front of you; he seemed to be in some sort of pain.

“y/n i really trust you please promise me you wont judge what i'm about to say.” the texan said it surprised you that he let his guard down for a favor- he's usually “tough” and “masculine” but he's here right now asking, no. begging you not to judge him for a favor. 

“I won't sapnap what was so urgent?” you said hoping it was important enough to interrupt your time off from being security at quackity’s casino. 

 “I can't…undo something” he said looking down which made you look down but you didn't make it to the floor, you found something more interesting in sapnaps shorts.

“Sapnap-” you didn't mean to come off as scared but the look on sapnaps face made you realize that you looked scared- 

Sapnap looked like he had just seen a ghost. He looked more scared than i could possibly look-

“Im sorry” he kept repeating after the 3rd one i cut him off.

“It's ok sap- Calm down-” you said, getting closer to the man freaking out in front of you. 

He looked at you, also taking a step closer, looking down at you. you guys were now close enough you could feel his breath against your cheeks. 

“y/n can i-” he was cut off by you pressing your lips against his.

He put his hands on your hips pulling you closer to the point you could feel his boner through his pants and your skirt. 

“You look like such a whore” he said after pulling away from the kiss

“Says the one who texted me bc he didnt wanna jerk himself off” you said rolling your eyes and looking up at the taller man. 

The man caught you by surprise when he went after your neck. You could feel the heat from the blaze hybrids lips. 

Getting lost in the feeling of his lips on your neck made you let out a moan immediately covering your mouth right after. 

“No sweetheart i wanna hear you scream my name” he said dragging you over to the kitchen and bending you over the counter pulling up your skirt.

You heard the hybrid's pants drop to the floor and you arched your back to tease the man behind  you.

Your lighthearted teasing was interrupted when you felt a sting on your ass. He just SPANKED you. You didn't mind tho it felt good. Too good, you accidentally let out another moan. 

“Yeah i bet you like that you fucking slut.” his dick entered your pussy without any prep or warning. 

“Fuck! Sapnap-” you moaned and continued making lewd sounds while the male fucked you. 

“That's right scream my name baby” his thrusts got faster and deeper making more lewd sounds come out of you. 

“f-f-f-!” you couldn't ask him to go faster you could only moan, you were unable to talk. 

“Words darling” he slowed down his pace letting you speak.

“Faster please sir.” you finally were able to say.

“Anything for my pretty little slut” the man sped up his pace again going faster than before. 

You were lost in pleasure until you felt the male pull your hair making your back hit his chest. 

“Open your mouth darling” he looked into your eyes with nothing but lust. 

You did as you were told in fear of being denied an orgasm later on. So you opened your mouth and he spit in your mouth. 

“Swallow.” he told you and you did so smiling after. 

“breed me please” you mumbled not meaning to. 

“What was that sweetheart?” he cooed knowing exactly what you said. 

“Breed me!” you screamed out, the entire smp could probably hear. 

Sapnap went feral after those 2 words left your mouth. 

He fucked you faster and deeper than you could’ve imagined then you felt it. A knot in yout stomach ready to come undone. 

“C-cum” you moaned, closing your eyes. 

“Do it princess” he whispered in your ear

You came undone on his cock babbling random things even you didn't understand.

Quickly after sapnap came inside of you with one last thrust he pulled out. 

All of you and sapnaps thoughts were interrupted when the front door opened and there dream stood. 

[coastxlwaters]

Coastal’s Quotes (imma make that a tag so y’all an make fun of me):

“DO NOT BLANKET SHAME IN MY ROOM, DO NOT BLANKET SHAME, I SWEAR IF U THROW T- “ (gets a pillow thrown in my face)

“I look down upon the enemies, as they have to look up to see my ass-“ (I may be aroace but like, I can want to look hot)

“LEMONADE, CRUNCHY, ICE, JUST LIKE MY LIFE IT MELTS INFRONT OF MY EYES”

“I heard you needed a bitch? Sadly they are out of stock, we have some assholes tho” *insert puppy eyes*

“Mrowph thy fiends” (I was tired and c a t)

“Heya mister cottonmouth, mind if I scoot past?” (His name is George and I love George, he did let me pass without getting defensive)

*storm thunders every five seconds* “YEAH YEAH IK UR COMING LET ME JUST PULL THESE DEAD FLOWERS UP YOU IMPATIENT-“ *i immediately get 5 severe thunderstorm warnings on my phone* “you petty, sassy, little shit, oh fuck I made Zeus mad when I flipped off the sky that one time-“ (my bsf is still concerned for my sanity)

“Autumn wtf did u shove me in a pile of horse shit-“ (this happens more than it should)

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

thinking about the dsmp steven universe au again bc like. c!dream as a diamond makes rose quartz seem like a fucking saint. like he gave zero shits about the morality of the other diamonds and participated in awful shit gleefully. he intentionally “broke” his first pearl bc he bored him and only spared the second (c!tommy) bc he found the fact he was defective fascinating and he basically treated him like an experiment on homeworld (tho tbf tommy would have been shattered if he didn’t do that, he was also genuinely protecting him by keeping him around to study). he ran off to earth and started the rebellion because he was bored and he found earth and humans interesting, but he didn’t have any moral oppositions to homeworld or anything. he protected gems deemed defective solely because he had an academic interest in them, and even though some of them (namely, the surviving crystal gems in this au that aren’t c!tommy) thought he was their friend he just saw them as test subjects. his only Actual friend was tommy and he was awful to him, and while he treated him vaguely better than on homeworld he did physically and mentally abuse him and never stopped giving him orders. having a half human child (namely, c!ranboo) was an impulsive suicidal act, and he left him without even knowing who his other parent was or any provisions to take care of him. he did genuinely help by starting a revolution against an incredibly corrupt regime but it was all for selfish reasons.

(for those wondering who some of the other characters are, they’re not super defined, but a philza/kristin fusion is sorta in the role of garnet tho i'm not sure who to pick for amethyst (personality doesn’t matter esp bc Tommy is the big sibling sorta role here, it’s the backstory and stuff that matters most). Tubbo is connie obviously. xd is white diamond and his Pearl/Dream’s original Pearl is George, spinel is sapnap (he got abandoned immediately after tommy existed). peridot is Jack Manifold and lapis is niki. everyone else is up in the air tho).

[calamari-minecraft-corner]

I’m drawing my dnd con au piece (one of MANY) but I don’t wanna gatekeep certain things! So— I’ll tell you guys the five monarchs of the continent’s classes (not subclasses tho I think it’ll be interesting c: )

-

King Quackity: Rogue

King Wilbur: Rogue

King Schlatt: Monk and Paladin

Queen Eret: Sorcerer and Cleric

King George: Druid

I wanna infodump so much on this au so FUCKING BAD but there’s so so much so if you guys wanna ask any questions about certain characters/interactions pls ask me I like answering asks about this very silly dnd au that will definitely not make me cry at some point

[supermaks]

just ~observations~ and thoughts but i wonder if the planned announcement of lewis going to ferrari happening later in the season would have changed his mentality as to how he takes the weekend. part of me says yes and part of me says no. like, lewis has noticeably turned down the heat in how he approaches his weekend in the last three years and gives the appearance of caring a lot less. lewis in general just doesn't preform to his peak when he wants to so there's historical precedence for it. but also, his lack of caring could also be a response to merc basically knowing in feb that he wasn't gonna be around and therefore he feels like he shouldn't be investing energy when they aren't doing the same for him (which i don't think either side is wrong). but also, george has kinda whipped up on lewis overall in the last three years so either george is much better than people think he is, or lewis is in for a rude awakening with charles.

A few things u said I wanna comment on. Im p sure the switch to Ferrari had to be on the table at least since May 2023. I'm mentioning that because 2023 wasnt a 'good' year for Lewis but it was definitely better than 2022 in all direct battles wid George, except for qualifying where he equaled George 11-11. Lewis was more consistent, had better pace, managed his weekends better, to the point he almost got Checo for p2 in the standings ((George finished p8)) So like, when u say that George been 'whipping' him up for 3 years ((and pls don't say it like that. I'm sorry I just. use any other word next time 😭)) its not really true. Also we're talking about a car that for a long time didn't even follow a basic development path because the base concept was wrong.

BUT heres where it gets tricky and I absolutely agree wid u: in 2022, complete no man's land for Merc, we still saw Lewis get the edge over George most Saturdays, 13-9. So even tho he improved in most areas in 2023 when the car got a lil better, u can still observe that downwards trend in quali performance. That's why its not that surprising to c the same happening this season, since it has been getting worse for 2 years, but at the same time, its one thing to lose sometimes and another to be down 8-1 in Canada. Canada is pure Hamilton country if he still cant put a q3 lap together here then somethings definitely wrong wid how he approaches q3. Ik he said some shit in Monaco like he doesnt expect to be in front of George for the rest of the season but that's like .. least inflammatory lew hammy statement and u kinda have to be like ok girl whtvr the fuck that means. But when ur coming out of a dominant fp1, fp2 and fp3, continuous improvement from q1 to q2, IN CANADA, and still lose .280 in q3, shit ton of corrections, no grip, then like .. I'm getting a lil worried. I very much doubt Lewis gets to Ferrari after a full season of this bullshit and whtvr he's dealing wid in quali just magically disappears. I hope Im wrong but idk . I really dunno. Regarding George being 'better than people think he is' or Lewis having a 'rude awakening' wid sharl like idk if its all that. Part of what makes this gap in quali so baffling is that so far its yet to translate to race pace. Lewis still drives an exceptional Sunday. f1 is a political nightmare I'm not 1 for conspiracies but nobody can deny there's a disconnect between Lewis and Merc that can be traced back to 2022 and never really healed. When it comes to a good q3 lap tho u either make it happen or u don't. Nothing really more to say.

[arcaneyouth]

Ooooh OC asks! Would love to hear more about Swag Georg (Your fellow in red with the crescent on the face) if you've got fun facts on the guy!

soooo. this got pretty long,,,,, because i don't explain george to people very often and i got excited. so a good chunk of this will be under a cut LAISUDHALSUIDH

george my beloved... that version of george is an overhaul of a dnd npc! the campaign never got finished after kinda falling out of touch with the players, but george was always my silly skrungle my blorbo my poor little meow meow. he was my favorite of the npcs and i didn't wanna leave him so i revamped him for my detectives story c:

george holds quite a bit of the same backstory. george is a human born and raised on another planet who helped his parents take care of a Celestial, Moon, a powerful being that needs to be kept under careful watch. bug warning but this is moon btw, but in the detectives story moon is much much smaller. after his parents died, george ended up joining the same organization that oversees the protection of celestials around the universe to make sure they don't bring about disaster. unfortunately this organization Fucking Sucks. they abandoned george back on his home planet years later when moon was bringing about a disaster (they thought he was dead to be fair) and he had to deal with it entirely by himself. he did succeed and moon is his very bestest friend in the entire world but it was a little bit very traumatizing

this is where current george and dnd george split off in terms of story. dnd george ended up joining the party when they were working for The Organization. i THINK current george may have done something similar? but basically he snuck moon into his pack and ran for it, ending up back on "earth" or whatever we wanna call The Main Planet in this universe before embracing the fact that he is technically a wanted criminal and teaming up with a mob boss. they're absolute besties and they get to be so silly together. george is absolutely living his best life as a criminal now. he gets to steal candy Whenever He Wants!!!

in the detectives story, starlight and george are presented as the main villains of the murder mystery when in reality they don't know who the fuck is killing all those people either. but they DO know someone who does, and she has begged them to keep dover, the main character and main detective on the case, away from the truth as long as possible. they happily oblige <3 and that's as much as i can really explain about george plot wise before i have to explain the entire convoluted plot to you c:

other fun facts!

george has a massive crush on dover and will NOT stop flirting with him. dover fucking hates him

george has power over gravity, able to point in a direction and make that direction "down" for him and anybody he's touching. he ALSO has a passive luck power that basically functions based on how funny it would be. he can't get caught by dover, just barely slipping away every time, because he is simply being so silly your honor. this doesn't mean he won't ever get caught tho

george is entirely unaware he has this luck power

moon is always just hanging out in his pack. moon will not ever cause a disaster because they love george very much and they like to be with him c: which sometimes means george will be heading out the door like "keys, wallet, gun- SHIT I FORGOT MY GOD"

george glorifies and admires criminals and cowboys and when he realized he was allowed to be both to the extreme he got So Excited this is gender euphoria for a cis man. nothing's under the mask or the shadows on his face he just thinks they're awesome

george is generally pretty good with kids!!!! starlight has a daughter, fleta, and george is like her funny uncle. there's a lot of kids in this story and they tend to flock to him cause he will dote on them and let them say hi to moon and yeah sure maybe sometimes he teaches them how to use weapons but in his defense that shit is so cool how can he not let them play with knives it's literally sick as fuck