#funny rare polyships

[acesw]

Butterfly Touches

Its not so often that all three of them get to meet.

The Timekeeper has tasks to assign, the Genius Inventor has experiments to run, and the sick cannot be left outside for too long.

However, in those rare and quiet moments, two or all three of them will lay on each other as a means of comfort.

They'll remove a layer of clothing that binds them, and love each other in a hushed intimacy that their minds would allow.

Of course, they are all quite young, and none of them have no interest in engaging in anything beyond removed coats and folded sleeves. Instead, they trace the marks on each others' skin with their hands.

A firm hand traces along pronounced veins, a thin hand touches along the cheek under a unique eye, and a rough hand will rub against old wounds now healed.

Very rarely will they mark each other with subtle kisses, lips pressing against beauty marks and scars alike.

Sometimes they will go as far as taking off their upper garments to see large unseen scars, and leave butterfly kisses along them without making any further advances.

Their love is strengthened this way, as intimacy requires trust, and its hard to gain it from either one of them—much less maintain it.

Just like that, their quiet moment passes. Shirt buttons slip on and coats are well-adjusted. With quiet kisses on each others' cheeks, they greet farewell, and the three of them are separate individuals once more.

To everyone else, they do not yearn for this kind of intimacy, as they all have circumstances that limit them. But love knows no bounds, and they are such an example.

[ambiguous-avery]

Cake by the Ocean

Dean Winchester x fem!Reader/You x Sam Winchester | WC: 971

Summary: You said it without thinking (or did you?), and they heard you loud and clear.

Tags/Warnings: Established polyship (no wincest), fluff, no use of Y/N, no beta we die like men

A/N: Another one for my Summer Snapshot Challenge! I love a good misunderstanding. You know the boys would totally be into it! 💜 Title from the song “Cake by the Ocean” by DNCE. Summer Snapshot Challenge 2025 Masterlist

It was a rare moment for the three of you. No monsters. No ghosts. No licking wounds in a shitty motel room. For the first time in as long as you could remember since you started hunting alongside the Winchesters, the three of you were able to enjoy an honest-to-God vacation.

You, Sam, and Dean were sprawled out beneath a large, striped umbrella, beach towels spread out beneath you. Sam was working his way through a paperback mystery on one side of you, and Dean enjoyed an ice cold beer on the other, sunglasses sliding down the bridge of his nose. And you were tucked right in between the two shirtless boys, happily sipping away at something fruity with a paper umbrella while enjoying the view – of the waves and your men.

“Mmm,” you murmured, stretching your legs out and polishing off your drink. “I could really go for sex on the beach.”

Dean practically choked on his beer, and Sam’s attention was abruptly pulled away from his story. You blinked at them innocently. “What?”

Dean pushed his glasses up onto his head, squinting at you like you had just grown a second head – but, you know, a hot second head.

“You usually make those kinds of declarations before noon, or is this, like, a vacation thing?” Dean asked, his eyes flicking from your mouth to your thighs then back up to your face.

“Am I wrong? You can’t tell me it doesn’t sound like the perfect thing to cap off a day like this. Warm sand, ocean breeze, a little salt on the skin…” You grinned. Sam cleared his throat and lowered his book.

“You, uh, been thinking about this for a while?” 

“Are we talking like ‘sand in places it doesn’t belong’ kind of sex on the beach? Or an improvised blanket situation?” Dean turned to face you fully, and you raised an eyebrow at him.

“Sounds like you’ve thought it through a bit already, Dean.”

“I’m just saying,” he said with a grin, “there are logistics involved.”

“You know that we do have a motel room like fifteen minutes away from here, right?” Sam’s tone was a mix of exasperation and matter-of-fact, but clad in only his swim trunks, there was no hiding the flush creeping down his neck.

“Oh my god you two are adorable.” You threw your head back with a laugh. Both Winchesters shared a look, confusion etching across their features. “I’m talking about the drink,” you clarified, shaking your empty glass so the ice clinked against the sides. “Vodka, peach schnapps, cranberry juice? Sound familiar?”

The silence that followed was deafening. Dean's mouth fell open slightly, and Sam's face went from flushed to absolutely crimson. You watched as the realization dawned on them both, and you couldn't help but dissolve into another fit of giggles. “Oh, you should see your faces right now,” you gasped between laughs, clutching your stomach. “Dean, you look like a fish. And Sam–” You turned to the younger Winchester, who you swore was trying to hide behind his paperback. “Are you trying to disappear into that book?”

Dean recovered first, as he always did, that cocky grin sliding back into place as he set his beer in the sand and rolled over top of you.

“Oh, you think you're real funny, don't you?” he drawled, caging you in with his arms as sand shifted beneath your towel. His green eyes sparkled with mischief and something darker. “You did that on purpose. Getting us all worked up over a cocktail.”

“I think I'm hilarious,” you shot back, not even trying to hide your grin as you looked up at him. The sun created a halo around his messy hair, and damn if he didn't look good enough to eat. “But I could go for the other kind, though. Blanket, not sand. Unless you two have strong opinions otherwise…” That stopped him short. Sam's book hit the sand with a soft thud.

“You're gonna be the death of us,” Dean muttered, but he was smiling as he said it, leaning down to press a kiss just above your collarbone.

“What a way to go though, right?”

“Oh, absolutely,” Dean replied, his voice dropping to that gravelly tone that always sent shivers down your spine. “Beats getting ganked by a ghost any day.”

“Guys, we're on a public beach,” Sam reminded you both, though he made no move to pick up his fallen book. Instead, he shifted closer, his large hand sliding the hem of your sun dress up and coming to rest on your bare thigh.

“Never stopped us before,” you teased, enjoying the way Sam's eyes darkened at your words. Dean chuckled against your neck.

“Remember that case in Arizona? Behind the abandoned theater?” Dean hummed.

“Or the cave in Oregon,” Sam added unexpectedly, a rare smirk playing on his lips. You sat up slightly, pushing Dean back just enough to look between them.

“Well, well, well. Look who's suddenly on board with public indecency.”

“I never said I wasn't on board,” Sam said, his voice quieter but no less heated. “I just like to… assess the situation first.”

“Glad one of us is responsible,” Dean said, not taking his eyes off you. “Always thinking with his big brain.”

“I think I’d prefer if you two thought with something else right now,” you said, a mischievous grin playing on your lips. Sam looked like his brain had just blue-screened, and Dean was looking at you like you were a challenge and a reward wrapped up neatly in a sundress.

“Careful, sweetheart. You keep talking like that, and you’re getting more than a drink with dinner.” The ice cubes in your glass clinked against each other as it slipped from your grasp and onto the beach towel under you.

“Here’s hoping.”

---

Likes, reblogs, and comments are greatly appreciated!

Dean taglist: @jollyhunter @aylacavebear @globetrotter28 @bettystonewell @supernotnatural2005 @sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth @maddie0101 @sir-thisisadndserver @colours-of-thewind @kiddieclaws @mostlymarvelgirl @rurwu @imalapdog @losers-clvb @zyra-7 @ladykitana90 @stoneyggirl2 @alexfms97 @jbear750 @tinysnacklefan @chevroletdean @pisces-celeste @springflwer07

Sam taglist: @jollyhunter @sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth @voodoochildthings @sir-thisisadndserver @colours-of-thewind @kiddieclaws @theamuz @mostlymarvelgirl @rurwu @imalapdog @losers-clvb @zyra-7 @ladykitana90 @stoneyggirl2 @alexfms97 @jbear750 @myceliumsunshine @bananapocalyps3 @tinysnacklefan @pisces-celeste @springflwer07

Drop a comment, ask away, or add yourself to my taglist!

[withered--ivy]

Welcome to my blog 🩵🪽

📬 requests and asks are open! i love talking about characters, ideas, and bard problems 🪽

🌷 Who am i?

Hi hi~ I don't really go by any particular name or pronouns

But you can call me Ivy~ 🩵🩵🍀

🌸 soft on the outside, screaming inside

🪶 baby writer & artist

🍃 main hyperfixation: genshin impact, esp mondstadt, attack on Titan, bungo stray dogs + many more ✨

🎨 i post fics, art, character thoughts, maybe some head-canons and unhinged rambles

🌿 expect: found family, lore spirals, emotional boys, and way too many venti braincells

I love the wind, the wine, and whatever the ragbros have going on ✨

Ao3 🔗: Withered Ivy

🌼 mondstadt supremacy

💙 venti is my little bird nightmare

🩶 kaeya and diluc are my emotional support disasters

🌸 i draw and cry about lore

💭 sometimes i talk about non-genshin things too (rare but soft)

☁️ vibes?

🌷 comedy until it hurts

🩵 tragedy that smells like flowers

🫧 friendship built mid-war

💐 mondstadt in my heart

🌸 i’m just here to love loudly and post the things i make

📚 𝒇𝒊𝒄 𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕: (AO3)

🩵 The Last Song of the First Gods

pre-canon | archon war | found family but divine

💫 emotional, nonlinear, god-bonding chaos

💔 tragedy wearing a funny hat

✨ status: ongoing

🩷As the Winds Rise Again

canon-era | Series | Archon Venti

🍷 Venti reclaiming his authority as an Archon

🔥❄️ The Ragbros are Ragbroing

🍃Jean is tired

🪽 mondstadt is loud tonight

💬 status: On going [One completed Arc, on break for now]

Guizhong's Quite Observations (Tumblr) 🗻📜

Guizhong's Quite Observations II (Tumblr) 🗻📜

Continue for request guidelines

📌 REQUEST GUIDELINES 💌

🧃 Fandoms I Write For:

Genshin Impact 🍃 | Stranger Things 🚲 | Attack on Titan 🔥 | Bungo Stray Dogs 🐺 | + a few other animes ✨

☁️ These will be posted on both Tumblr & AO3! ☁️

✅ I WILL WRITE:

✨ Drabbles

Lil bite-sized scenes, usually 3–4 paragraphs. Quick hits of fluff, angst, or chaos 💥

✨ Oneshots

Longer stories! These may take me more time, and I’ll only take requests if I’m feeling ✨inspired✨.

✨ Headcanons

PLEASE send these I love them so much 🫶 You can ask for random ones, specific prompts, or even send me your own ideas to expand on!

✨ Ships

Character x Character 💞 and Character x Reader 💌 are both welcome! Polyships are fine too — I’m open, but I may gently decline if something doesn’t vibe with me 💫

✨ Fluff & Romance

The soft stuff. Holding hands. Cozy naps. Mutual pining. YES.

✨ Angst

Yes. YES. Let them suffer. Prompts like “how they’d react if someone died” are very welcome. I love making these poor bbs emotionally combust 💔🕯️

✨ Angst with Comfort

Because I do have a heart 😌💗 I’m okay with heavier topics like self-harm or trauma, as long as there’s comfort involved. These fics will always have content warnings and be handled with care 🫂

✨ Platonic Relationships

Sibling dynamics, besties, grumpy & sunshine duos — love writing these!! 💕✨

🚫 I WON’T WRITE:

❌ Proships or age-inappropriate content

No:

• Minor x Adult

• Teacher x Student

• Anyone that looks or acts like a kid x adult

Just… no. 🚫🚫🚫

❌ Smut

Not because I hate it, but because I will die of cringe. 😭 I have a skill issue. Maybe one day. Today is not that day.

❌ “Dark Romance”

If it glorifies abuse, rape, manipulation, etc — I don’t want it anywhere near my inbox. 🚷

❌ Ageplay

Nope. Nope. Nope. ❌

❌ Harem Tropes

I love respectful polyships 💖 but harem-style writing tends to feel icky and fanservice-y. Not my thing!

❌ Just... weird stuff™

Hard to define but easy to sense. If something gives me ✨bad vibes✨ I’ll politely pass. Please be normal <3

🦋✨ Final Notes:

🕊️ Requests are open only when tagged open!

💫 Be kind, be cool, and let’s make some chaos together!

🍓 Thanks for reading, now go hydrate and romanticize your life 💕

[northernyogurt]

Hello! It's so rare to see a Finn shipper in this fandom and I love your art!

I was curious as to what your thoughts are on a Finn/Jake/Piers polyship?

THIS IS LITERALLY MY LIKE. OH MY GOD. THIS IS MY KRYPTONITE I DIDNT KNOW OTHER PEOPLE THOUGHT OF THIS. jakinniers is the term me and a friend coined for this pairing and i have like three tagged posts with it; swear to god this is my favorite pairing of ALL TIME (i do not say this lightly) i just didn't really post throuple art very much. ITS SUCH AN INTERESTING DYNAMIC AND I . I. I DONT KNOW HOW OTHER PEOPLE HAVENT DELVED INTO THIS. there's the inherent tension of mullvans with the sickly sweet fiers and the cute funny pairing of macmuller and its like. oh my god. they all just complete each other. piers is the serious jake is the jokester causing problems and finn is the Peacemaker i have so many thoughts on this i don't even think i could get into it in one post like. like. like THEY MAKE ME SO SICK I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. it's such a deep and lovely dynamic i'd have to take several posts to explain it's just genuinely so good i have to draw them again soon they mean the world to me

[sniper-maid]

Rules

Rules

Hey, I’m Caro! I’m really shy, but friendly. I have been in and out of rp since the late 90s. (God, how did I get this old?) Feel free to approach me if you are interested in rping with me. As long as you respect my rules, we’ll likely get along swimmingly.

Anyone is free to send asks, etc; however, I will only rp with other Black Butler muses. This is a sideblog, with my main being @hotmonkeelove (which I will follow back from). All posts will relate to Mey-Rin, Black Butler, or rp in some way, even if it's just muse aesthetics or prompts.

Any genre is fine, though I’m not crazy about fight scenes. Depending on my mood, I may be more inclined to write a particular themed thread. That said, lighthearted, funny, or fluff interactions are always welcome.

AU threads are cool, but I’m not comfortable with crossovers. They’re just difficult to immerse myself in. So again, BB characters only for rp.

OCs are cool, though I don’t always feel like I mesh with them. I’m more likely to write with canon characters that Mey-Rin has or at least might interact with at some point.

This blog is Not Safe For Work and I am way over 21. I don’t strictly play smut scenes, but I do enjoy them very much. And I do have a thing for kink. (Though bear in mind, my Mey is subby!) What’s more, I have a rather naughty sense of humour. Follow at your own peril.

Not Safe For Work posts will be tagged as lemon (nsfw), and will generally be behind a cut. Suggestive posts will be tagged as lime (suggestive). I also use basic trigger warning tags, such as fire! (violence), aftermath (blood/ gore), bdsm, death, etc. Keep in mind, I don’t write violent stuff that often. It’s mostly just the kinky stuff you have to worry about.

As for shipping, my Mey follows canon in that she is very much hopelessly in love with Sebastian. I have no intention of shipping with any other muse, but Sebby. The only exception I will make is if it's a polyship that also involves Sebastian. In which case, bring on the thirds! (Grelle or Agni would probably be the most likely, as the other Phantomhive servants are more like brothers to Mey.)

There are two characters that are absolute NOTPs for my Mey to ship with: Ronald Knox (because I don't like him and think he's a creep) and Nina Hopkins (as she is a creep and Mey doesn't like being groped!) Mey will interact with the characters, but she is not interested in them!

I won’t ship with underage muns or muses. Please don't bother asking.

TERFs, homophobes, racists, and bigots of any kind will not be tolerated. I will block you immediately.

Please bear with me if I lag behind. I sometimes get writer’s block, not to mention severe depressive episodes that make it difficult to concentrate and also zap my motivation. Additionally, I have a rare sleep disorder that wreaks havoc with my schedule. It sucks, but there’s not much I can do for it.

Yes, I am on discord. Please let me know if you want to rp with me there and I will share with you my discord number.

[self-ship-or-die]

So, quick introduction while I'm on break. My name is Beth and I've been self-shipping since long before I knew what shipping, sex, and even romance was. I just wanted to be with someone who loved me, even if I didn't know all the different kinds were and thought love was just hugging and spending time together.

Im in a bunch of different fandoms and honestly, this blog is to keep all my stuff in one spot instead of spread across the 26 different blogs I have. I take part in multiple fandoms with at least one self-ship in each. Funny to say, but I'm very monogamous in my self-shipping and don't look for comfort in multiple characters in the same fandom, a romantic relationship with one being enough and anyone else a good friend. It's not like I don't self-polyship, but it's very rare and something I'm trying to get familiar with since it would be fun, I think.

I go into specifics later or when I feel like blabbing, but I self-ship for comfort and more recently, to help process trauma from how I grew up ( I.e. Bill Dickey hit a real sore spot and I didn't realize how much he reminded me of an ex in highschool/college until I worked on the outline for a comic/short fic I had.)

That's all for now, I'll have a better intro pinned to the top of my blog at a later date. If someone is actually reading this, hello! I hope you have a good day and I hope we have a great new year, we'll need the fucking luck.

[annwayne]

💚💖💕 for the unpopular ask game!

Thanks for the ask!!

💚: What does everyone else get wrong about your favorite character?

Oh boy. Well, to be honest of the sga fans I've seen, there haven't been any memorably bad takes about Rodney. I must be in a safe bubble ahaha. So I'll say something that might not be apparent if you didn't watch Rodney's every move like a hawk. Rodney is the most optimistic member of the sga team. Don't get me wrong, he catastrophizes and he jumps to worst case scenarios all the time. But this is the same guy who believes he can always succeed, more importantly, that his teammates can succeed in every situation. I think The Last Man really proves just how far his optimism can go. Sure, having a massive ego helps with that, but I don't think it's enough.

💖: What is your biggest unpopular opinion about the series?

lmao, okay get ready for this one; upon first watch, I did not see any of the John/Rodney ship fuel. It had to be explained for me to pick up on it, so all those posts that talk about how obvious that John's sexuality is deep in the closet/how obvious the love story between John and Rodney is? I just don't agree it's obvious. And this truly is just an opinion on interpretation. Unless I really latch on to a character, I don't usually question what the show is telling me about them. And since SGA started as a casual 'on while playing video games, doing chores, and drawing' show, I really wasn't paying close attention.

💕: What is an unpopular ship that you like?

Shall I be funny and say my oc/todd ship? xD No, no, I'm not sure what counts as unpopular in this fandom? It seems like every ship gets a little bit of attention. Todd/Keller is a ship I like more than most, though I don't think it's all that unpopular? I read a fic that really got me to like John/Dave in that very specific set up lol. Polyships seem less common, so I'll John/Rodney/Teyla/Ronon is another I like. Canon/canon just. Rarely gets me invested lol. At the same time, show me a ship and 99% of the time I'll go "cool!" There's rarely ever canon/canon ships I dislike.

Unpopular Opinion Ask Game

[incorrect-skylanders-quotes]

My (kinda disjointed) thoughts on some Skylanders ships (part 1)

Trying something new today! It's gonna be hard to write an opinion on Skylander ships, considering the fact that most of them are crackships and half the characters have really basic personalities, but I'll try my best. I'm starting with the dragon Skylanders, but I'll eventually cover other Skylander pairings in the future.

Spyro x Cynder: 9/10. Pretty basic, all things considered. It's the ship people choose because they were hardcore Legend of Spyro fans and shipped Spynder back then. I do think they have a good dynamic; Cynder's evil past is ripe with angst and hurt/comfort potential, and Spyro being the one to save her naturally makes him a perfect candidate to provide the "comfort" part. At the same time though, I understand the appeal of having them remain platonic since as of 2023, Skylanders is the only Spyro media to have both appear without any hint of romance between them.

Spyro x Sunburn: 6/10. It's mostly an ironic ship I thought of as a joke during the early days back when I only did incorrect quotes exclusively about the dragon Skylanders. I don't think Sunburn and Spyro would really have a whole lot of interesting interactions.

Spyro x Whirlwind: 1/10. I don't see the appeal. To me, they're just friends or coworkers. Nothing more than that. The only reason anyone ships this is that they hate Cynder or Spynder, but they also don't want to ship Spyro with the humanoid girls or Sonic Boom because "interspecies romance yucky"

Whirlwind x Cynder: 9/10. The opposite of Spywind. These two have a great dynamic, Whirlwind being ostracized for her mixed heritage, while Cynder's distrusted for her past as a servant of Malefor. The two could find a lot of comfort in each other due to their shared experiences. The only reason it's not a complete 10/10 is because I prefer pairing the two with other characters.

Whirlwind x Sunburn: 8/10. It's aight. I guess the way their backstories contrast is interesting, Whirlwind used to be hated for being a dragon hybrid while Sunburn was coveted for the same reason.

Whirlwind x Camo: 7/10. No strong opinions.

Sunburn x Camo: 8/10. I can see why it has appeal. Two pranksters goofin' off together is always nice.

Whirlwind x Sunburn x Camo: 9/10. Whirlwind and her two supportive bfs, who are also dating each other. I think overall I prefer polyshipping these three over their separate ships, but the reasons why are based entirely on fanon I made up regarding the three.

Whirlwind x Zap: 5/10 ...Eh? Nothing wrong with it, but I don't really see the appeal either. It's better than Spywind because the entire basis for the ship isn't just "a hetero dragon ship for Spyro that isn't Cynder"

Side note: Damn, Whirlwind has a lot of ships. Why is that?

Drobot x Camo: 8/10. I think it's really funny. Drobot the serious, intelligent, and logical-minded, while Camo is a jokester who makes fruit explode for shits and giggles. The contrast between serious and silly always makes for a fun dynamic, and I think if the two ever got meaningful interactions, Camo would be the guy who'd get Drobot to loosen up.

Bash x Flashwing: 8/10. This pairing actually has ground to stand on since it's one of the only ships that have actual potential for being canon. Bash falling in love with Flashwing is literally half of her backstory, and it's a standout trait for Bash and Skylanders in general. It's rare for Skylanders characters to actually have romantic feelings for anyone, much less each other, which is what makes this ship so appealing, it's potential for exploring this idea. Sadly, canon has not seen that potential. There's been no actual exploration of the pairing in Skylanders media, not even the comics or Skylanders Academy, which literally exist to flesh out the goddamn Skylanders. The closest we get is apparently from a book called "Skylanders Universe: The Complete Collection, page 39" which states Flashwing canonically likes Bash back, though she won't admit it out loud (don't quote me on this, I got it from the wiki). That's it. That's all we get. If the pairing actually got explored in official Skylanders material, then it'd be a 9 or a 10.

[ciaossu-imagines]

I honestly only had a handful of polyships for Disney’s Ultimate Spider-Man and at least one of them is kind of more on the taboo side and would get me a lot of flack for writing about, I’m guessing, so while it would have been my first pick, I decided to go with a safer bet! I used this prompt again and hope you all enjoy the headcanons for Ben/Reader/Flash!

Who cries when someone dies in a movie?

Not somebody, but goddamn, if a dog dies in a movie, Flash is in tears. Just please don’t let anyone know. He left the room whenever a scene like that came on early on in your relationship, with excuses like needing to pee or needing to grab more popcorn because he’s embarrassed about his reaction and didn’t want you to see. It’s only once the two of you are super close and he fully trusts you that he’ll let you see him tear up at those scenes and it would crush him if you ever let anyone, and especially Ben, know his little soft side.

Who wears the ugly holiday garb?

Flash definitely buys the three of you ugly Christmas sweaters, the absolute gaudiest ones he can find (with a distinct preference for ones with jingle bells or lights) to wear together on Christmas Eve. Ben scowls the whole time he’s wearing it but does it for you and Flash. The pictures Flash wants to take while wearing the sweater…yeah, those aren’t happening.

Who pays for the meals?

I feel like it would be you the most and that meals out are actually kind of a rare occasion. Both Ben and Flash didn’t grow up with lots of spare money and are really kind of frugal with the money they do get because it’s a security thing to them. They never want to live in that kind of poverty again and definitely don’t want that for the life they want to build with you. So suppers out are normally limited to special occasions or if  you offer to treat them and both men are always quite appreciative when you do, though Ben forgets his manners and saying thank you.

Who slams the oven door and who plays the trombone?

Ben doesn’t want to do this. This is dumb…so how did he manage to end up in sunglasses, scowling and mindlessly slamming an oven door while either you or Flash try to play a trombone and the other one films it all? Please someone tell him because he really doesn’t know.

Who brings home stray animals?

Flash always wanted pets growing up but his parents never let him have any. They just didn’t have the money to afford a pet and whenever, in his childhood, Flash would sneak a stray into the house, feeding it part of his meals, they’d end up throwing the animal right back out onto the streets when they found it and would ground Flash. Because of this, Flash, once out on his own and in a place where he can have pets, tends to adopt strays, both ones that stay outside and ones that he brings into the house. Oddly enough though, and it’s a bit of a sore spot for Flash, most of the animals take to you or Ben quicker than they do to him.

Who leaves the bathroom door open?

This is something Ben does. He wasn’t really taught much in the way of manners or of how to properly live with others and it’s definitely a learning curve for him. He still forgets every now and again, and it’s something you and Flash will have to either get used to or remind him kindly about.

Who tells the ‘dad jokes’?

Flash really isn’t funny, at least not when he’s trying to be, and a lot of his humour is puns and bad dad jokes. If you tell dad jokes too, it will turn into a little competition of seeing who can tell the worst one.

Who wants kids more?

This is either you or Flash. Flash definitely sees having children in the future, preferably a boy and a girl, just that classic all-American family. Ben, meanwhile, is very, very adamant that he doesn’t want children and he would hold that child-free attitude for most of his life. He doesn’t know how to be a father, doesn’t know how to handle children, and the whole idea just terrifies him, if he’s being honest.

Who travels more?

Both men will travel a fair bit in their work as superheroes, especially where they work with S.H.I.E.L.D. Whenever possible, they really like travelling with you as well. Ben hates making travel arrangements or planning things out more while Flash has a harder time remembering to be properly respectful of other cultures while out traveling.

Who spends more cash?

I mentioned above, but it’s likely you. As said, both Ben and Flash are pretty careful with their money and while Flash might spend big on more lavish purchases, like a car, he does so only when he’s saved up enough money to do so.

Who buys the things in infomercials?

Now, while smart with his money, when he does have enough for a little spending, I feel like infomercials would definitely draw Flash in, or anything on the shopping channel. He buys easily into fancy words and graphics and if an item looks really cool or high-tech, he really will want to go buy it. He also really likes buying you stuff off the shopping channel and it’s where most of your birthday and Christmas gifts come from.

Who draws in the dust on their cars?

Okay, but when Flash has a car, there isn’t ever dust on it to draw in. He is so proud of his vehicle that he keeps it nice and clean. It becomes a hobby of his, cleaning and polishing and shining up his baby, who he will definitely let you name. Ben prefers a motorcycle over a car and while it might get dirty or messy, he gets pissy when anyone touches it and after a fight about it, neither you or Flash would draw on it. So, it would have to be your car that got drawn on and I think neither of them would really do that, honestly.

Who starts the snowball fights?

This would be Flash, no question asked. What else are you supposed to do in the snow, after all? And he’s got such great aim that he’s always going to hit you or Ben. Ben is easily drawn into a snowball fight because he hates being hit with snowballs and retaliation is his first instinct in most things. If you want to play, Flash is so happy and him and Ben take it easy on you, even though they say they don’t. That being said, Flash will get pouty if you just want to observe.

Who throws away the directions to things?

Both of these men can be completely stubborn asshats when it comes to this. They both insist that they already know what to do and they don’t need the directions. Just trust them, alright? And then, of course, hours go by and as much as you try to tell them what the directions say, they both tune you out or get snappy because goddammit, they are not losing to whatever contraption they bought.

Who puts up holiday décor?

Flash really loves Christmas. It’s a really strong headcanon of mine that it’s his favourite holiday, though he also gets really into Halloween and Easter and most holidays. They were big things for him growing up, really the only time his family splurged on much, and holidays play a huge part in his good memories. So when it comes to celebrating holidays with you and Ben, he wants to make those same kind of memories, wants to do all the holiday-esque things, especially when it’s around Christmas. He wants the three of you to deck out the house together, to drink hot chocolates around a fire place, to take Christmas card pictures, to build gingerbread houses. It really means the absolute world to him and it’s really apparent to both you and Ben, who do go along with him, albeit with some snarking on Ben’s part.

Who is more likely to forget to bathe?

This is easily Ben. Even canonically, he’s not really shown to care too deeply, if at all, about personal hygiene and while it’s something he improves on, he sees no big issues in going a few days to a week without showering or bathing or even brushing his teeth if he’s busy.

Who gets more obsessed about things?

Flash is more open about his passion for things, but Ben is more obsessive. Flash never really hyper-focuses on one thing. It’s normally ‘thought, act on thought, thought gone and done with’ in Flash’s mind whereas Ben broods terribly over things and has a really hard time banishing thoughts from his mind.

Who sings in the shower more often?

I feel like Flash definitely sings in the shower and, in a surprising twist, it’s normally show-tunes or musical numbers. It’s just a shame that he is such a terrible, terrible singer. Both you and Ben quickly learn to either wear headphones when he goes in to shower or to turn up the television or radio to drown out the noise.

[jasonxnathan]

Gib me all your poly ships involving Nathan x Jason >:3 <3

Oh oh oh! Born 4 thiiis!

Jason x Nathan x Puppeteer

Jason and Puppeteer already have a funny balance, Jason loving the idea of becoming a doll himself He adores everything to do with Puppet. While on the more depressing side I can see Puppeteer drawn to Nathan's grief, feeding his urge to help this poor human overcome his emotions or offer the loving embrace that on puppeteer can offer.

Jason x Nathan x Candy Pop

Besties to lover arc? YES PLEASE! Candy Pop just bring life to the two and can add many...fun.. things to the dynamic. Jason and Candy Pop are already friendly rivals, but I can see an extra spice of involving Nathan in the middle. Candy spoils the two with many treats. If I may get a bit NSFW. I can see Candy Pop switching up all over the place, even topping Jason. -Jason x Nathan x Doll Maker

The two craftsman just chefs kiss! If I remember Doll Maker is afraid of men (don't blame the guy) So I HC that trust between the three was a very, very slow burn. To get even darker I can see dressing up Nathan's sister being the reason the three of them got together. Or, alternatively something that brought them closer, like something Jason and Doll Maker secretly plotting together for Nathan. -Jason x Nathan x Bloody Painter

I have to admit this one is more of my guilty pleasure polyships, As I never could think for a way to justify the three of them having a proper set up, other than MAYBE meeting through Puppet.

-Jason x Nathan x Eyeless Jack Another Guilty pleasure ship. EJ without a doubt came strolling in to eat some part of Jason's dolls. Or even smelled fresh meat with the two guys. Just a horribly messy ship and I am here for it.

And of course, given poly ships above. I have mixed them all together, on giant poly ship. Jason, Nathan, Candy, and Puppeteer

Nathan, Jason, Puppeteer, and Doll Maker Jason, Eyeless Jack, Candy Pop, Nathan, Puppeteer. ALLL OF THEM

etc.

You get the idea.

Its rare to see a poly ship working out, frankly I think we need more poly ships instead of monogamous ships. That's just my lifestyle however.

I have a newer ship, I will admit I dont know a lot about the oc but his name is Julius. I can just see the three of them just meshing too well.

Please anyone else have ships with Jason and Nathan, Give them to me! ALL OF IT! Not joking.

[radiantmists]

getting into jongerrymartin is funny because i’m pretty sure most of us started out shipping jonmartin but also shipping jongerry because seriously they have so much chemistry in that one meeting etc. so we mash them together. 

but this then leads to thinking seriously about what gerrymartin is like, and at some point you realize that it actually has so much potential and you’re left shipping not only a non-canon polyship, rare enough, but also shipping two characters who have literally never met and barely even acknowledge each other’s existence in canon, and it’s wild

[zirkkun]

So I won't say much about it in this ask, since I already basically said my piece in my rb of it, but I will say it again, that I agree wholeheartedly w/ your recent ramble/rant post about Sans (kind of), I also like some of the additions. Now, to talk & ask abt what I mainly wanted to talk abt here, since I thought it work better as an ask.

So, yes, I agree Mettasans is so rare, & I actually really like the ship &/or relationship. Kke Insans & Metta's bond is a fav of mine in ALIVE, & liked talkingsoup's small one-shot(s) of Mettasans for some examples. Basically, I like it, and I wish there was more of it, but I take what I can get.

Not ship-y at all, but the like, one interaction Sans and Metta had in AtF I thought was funny, he just took and disappeared Willo away from Metta to talk to himself, idk, I just thought it was funny. Makes me wonder if there will be an chance for interesting Sans and Metta inteactions in ULR. Ask 1/2. Doing this as 2 asks, because tumblr loves to eat asks in general, but esp. longer asks. So just in case, this ask will be 2 asks; hope that is ok w/ you.

Sorry, this took me a while to get to because it’s a lot of stuff and I’ve just been really too tired to answer it until now 😂💦

For Metacrit and Ace interactions, there is some planned stuff that happens but at the moment I’m not wholly certain how much of it will actually make the cut. I have mentioned and showed some stuff here before I think(? But they’re a little more well-aware of each other than Mettaton and Sans were in UT, and have a completely different dynamic from their UL counterparts as well. There’s also like... nothing right now planned for Metacrit and Duo interactions. I know Papyton was a big thing in the original UL but with how I wrote ULR they just sort of... never get the chance to meet? 😂 Oops. I don’t mind if people still make Papyton stuff outta them though, go wild however you want, hehe.

As for the polyship AU, oh boy, it’s a big mess. It’s like, self-insert, reader-insert, and also somehow happens to have a major hovering subplot of Ink just being with basically everyone at some point, and now I’ve been using some of them for RP’s as well just to make things more confusing because now technically with that there’s two Errors, two Killers, and two Swap!Sanses fdbhas. There’s a LOT of characters now, and the blog I made for it ( @ut-polyship ) is EXTREMELY outdated right now. The main characters are basically “the human,” “the creator,” “the vessel,” Sans, Lust, Ink, Blue, Mal, Nightmare, Killer, Cross, and Dream. Other characters also show up in some parts. I’ve also sprialled off and made splitting timelines from it already... I really need to post more about it FDSBHA

I don’t know whether or not I’ll make anything with MettaSans in the future. It’s really a toss up for how motivated I feel to make it. I don’t usually make a lot of ship content more than I consume it -- UT is actually probably the only fandom since like, Elsword that I’ve been in that I’ve actually made ship content for. And I was in the Elsword fandom in like. 2014-2016. LMAO. It’s a miracle I’ve made like the couple of ErrInk pieces and one Cream piece. And also an accidental KillInk shipkid. And an Inkmare shipkid I don’t remember if I posted or not. These things happened. They also happen to be brothers. Jesus I need to post more. LMAO. S’alright, I have a fic and sideblog in the works for them already actually 👀

As for the VN’s you mentioned, I have heard of them! The creator of Nightmare’s Castle is actually helping with Act to Flirt as well ^^ and Sparks of the Heart I don’t know as much about, but I remember seeing it and sending it to a friend who’s a total Grillby simp. They both look really cool!! I’m excited to see more about them. 

[uchihashisui-kun]

Those headcanons about Shisui's anbu team are so funny, d'you have more?

Ah, happy to know someone liked them XD I do have some more, I'm... Basically creating a whole-ass team where Shisui is the only canon character and I spent like two hours looking for names for them, so Imma have fun *Evilly rubs his hands*

Every single one of the squad has a different hobby

Crane knows how to stitch and make embroidery, and she's the one that stitches someone's uniform if it get ripped. She also always stitches the kanji for Tori on everyone's new uniform

Owl makes origami, and she writes little things inside of them. She likes to leave them around for the squad to find, even if they rarely open them to read whatever Owl wrote, because they always feel bad when they ruin them

Hummingbird likes to draw, especially landscapes. He has a lot of drawings about the forest surrounding Konoha, and every time he goes somewhere far for a mission he always makes sure to take some time to draw the new landscape

Names time!

Crane's name, when she's out of her ANBU persona, is Kaede Morimoto. She's a little spitfire with hair as red as a maple tree. In fact, 'Kaede' means 'maple', while 'Morimoto', her family name, means 'to live in a forest' and 'born from the origin, starting from the root'

Owl's real name is Takara Hyuuga. Her parents gave her that name because 'Takara' means 'someone precious, to cherish like a jewel'

Hummingbird is Shun Aburame. 'Shun' means 'a fast and talented person', but also 'living in the moment'

(I'm a nerd who loves meaningful names, what can I do)

Crane's main chakra affinity is water, but she can also use fire and earth

Owl's main chakra affinity is fire, but she can also use lightning

While Hummingbird's main chakra affinity is earth, but he can also use fire and wind

Crane and Parrot (Shisui) are the most explosive members of the squad, and there's a rule to never let them alone for a long period of time

Last time it happened, they started trying to combine their jutsu for a joined attack, and while combining water and fire to create boiling hot steam is, in fact, very useful, trying to combine fire and lightning almost made them blow themselves up

-10/10 the nurse was not amused when they showed up at the hospital with more burned skin than not

The Hokage and the rest of the squad even less when they both had to be put on medical leave for a training accident

Crane and Shisui are both Jōnin, while Owl and Hummingbird are Tokubetsu Jōnin

Team Tori knows very little about modesty, and sometimes they sleep all together like a big cuddle pile and decency be damned

An ANBU recruit once found them sleeping in Shisui's apartment all in the same bed, all of them more naked than dressed

They are not in a polyship, they're just familiar enough with one another to not give a damn

Hummingbird, even after all the years together, sometimes still finds it wild that they don't mind/feel disgusted by all the little holes littering his body and the fact that insects live inside him

Crane has a crush on Anko, and it's terrible. She loves deadly and lowkey insane people, so of course she had to pick one of the most unhinged and insane people of all Konoha

Shisui is not surprised, he's had a crush on Anko, too, for a period of time

Hummingbird and Owl pray for Crane and Anko to never even become friends, let alone lovers. It would be the end

Despite her... Explosive personality, Crane is the best of the squad when it comes to infiltration, because she's small and can fit almost everywhere

Owl is the squad's sensor, coupled with her Byakugan it makes it almost impossible to sneak up on her

Shisui tried once for a prank, and found himself with a broken arm because Owl thought it was an assassination attempt

Rule number 1: Never sneak up on an ANBU

One would think that Shisui would know these rules, and he does. He just ignores them most of the time

Shisui finds himself more often injured from training accidents than from missions. Hummingbird has given up on the idea of trying to beat carefulness into his thick skull

[sinsbymanka]

If you ever have an issue with how something is tagged on this blog PLEASE feel like it's okay to send me a dm. I do try my best to tag appropriately, although there's always a chance I've fucked up.

I do follow standard tagging conventions here because I feel like they're most thorough. So I tag:

manka writes - my writing tag

Fandom - usually dragon age and then the specific game

Ships and background ships if they're a major part of the story (they're not always) listed in alphabetical order (female cadash/varric tethras)

Individual characters that appear in the fanfiction

Whether or not it's smut using shameless smut and/or lemon

Events I'm writing for (DA Drunk Writing, Rare Egg Hunt, Smutquisition, DA Polyshipping Day...)

Any other pertinent information such as if it's part of a longer story or an AU or has content warnings

Funny bullshit

I probably won't be changing this system up because I think it adequately covers all my bases. However if I miss something above - let me know. If you want to share for others to see how one person thinks about tags on tumblr, feel free ❤

[yamsgarden]

So you polyship? Because I see that Formaggio/Melone/Ghiaccio and my heart...

OHH SHIIIIIIIIIIIII-- as dumb as it may sound when i like one ship i stick to it and will rarely see one of the two with someone else ;dfjsjkdf i dont mind seeing other’s art i just dunno if i could draw it myself WAHA XD BUT HGN I-- I DON’T KNOW ADFHSFKGH.KJ i think this trio is rly cute and funny together but IDKFORPOLYSHIPADOFSLHDJSHFJ

[lettercastauthor]

Spider-Barista: Part One, Pumpkin Spice Latte, Extra Whip

AU Summary and Warnings: Tony Stark survived the snap that killed Thanos and only lost his arm, Steve Rogers has returned from his brief time travel escapades after realizing he’s not as straight as he thought he was, and his feelings for Tony went far beyond friendship. Tony, Steve, Peter, Rhodey, Pepper, and Nebula are in a polyship and were living at Stark’s private New York residence located somewhere in the city ���near all the action,” also close to Peter’s school. Peter, 18, is finishing senior year. Recently, Pepper and Morgan Stark have left for upstate New York to begin Morgan’s private school. Overprotective “auntie” Nebula joined them due to her own safety concerns, leaving the boys to fend for themselves. Unknown to everyone, Tony is having a secret sciencey-fling with Bruce Banner, kept private for shy Bruce’s sake. Aunt May is on a cruise in the Bahamas.

Tony has offered to pay for Peter’s college, but Peter is being stubborn and wants to earn it for himself, so he gets a job at the local coffee shop and quickly finds a love for the job. In fact, he loves it so much that he begins to neglect his Super-Hero duties. At first Tony is supportive of a break from the dangerous life of saving New York on the daily, despite Cap’s urging Peter to take on bigger baddies and hone his skills. But they both soon realize Peter’s interest in coffee is mainly tied to a cute customer who comes in on Peter’s every shift. Unbeknownst to Peter, this customer lives a double life. This will be a serial story, updated when I have time. There will be NSFW content, each section that includes NSFW content will be marked accordingly so the reader can choose to enjoy the story while skipping the lewd parts should the desire.

Everyone in this story is 18 or older.

Tl;Dr: Adult Tom Holland Spider-Man is working as a barista post-blip. He’s in a polyship with Tony, Steve, Rhodey, Pepper, and Nebula. He has a crush on one of his patrons and is neglecting his heroic duty. There’s NSFW stuff in here. 

Part One: “Pumpkin Spice Latte, Extra Whip”

Warm yellow sun pierced through the sepia tinted windows of the coffee shop. It was a nice clear day. The taxi cabs sat bumper-to-bumper, the people hurriedly walked the sidewalks like a fashion-show runway, carrying their coats over their shoulders on this uncharacteristically warm November afternoon. A flash of green dashed through the crowd of customers as Peter Parker raced round the back entrance of the counter to clock in. His apron whooshed around him as he stopped at the register, punched in his employee ID number, and jumped into the flow of things, watching the front door intensely as he worked the hot bar with lightning speed. 

Customers loved Peter. He was quick, he never messed up a drink, and he always served with a smile. Pete’s co-workers loved him because whenever he worked, everyone got higher tips. The manager liked him because he always showed up for every shift, but she felt he could be better at the cleaning part of the job; she made sure to mention that in his quarterly review. Right on time, five minutes after 2:00 p.m., Peter’s favorite customer walked in. He told all the customers they were his favorite, but this one in particular was actually his favorite. 

The bell chimed and a man walked in, brown coat draped over his arm, gray knit sweater hugging his broad shoulders and chest just tight enough to portray a hint of modelesque musculature. This was Jamie. Jamie always wore a steel-blue tie, pulled tight around his white collared button-up shirt. Today, he sported a pair of well-fitting khaki slacks, brown oxfords, argyle socks. Clothing tells you everything about a person in New York City. Jamie’s clothes told Peter this: that Jamie had a job in the city, a real job, the kind you do in an office that looks over the hustle and bustle of the commoner’s everyday lives. Or so Peter imagined. He looked like most New York businessmen, but to Peter he was the definition of heaven. He was also unattainable. Peter rarely worked the register, due to being what the manager called “too friendly.” All his chatting with the customers slowed up the line. Unfortunately, Pete’s normal position at the bar fixing drinks kept him behind a wall of glass and noisy machines. The barrier made it near impossible to communicate effectively with customers.

His only chance was at the passthrough area, where he would set each hand-crafted beverage and call out the name of the customer it belonged to. Jamie changed up his drink often, which both frustrated and intrigued Peter. He wanted to be able to make Jamie’s drink quick enough that he could have a second to drop him his number on a napkin, but by the time Peter learned Jamie’s drink (usually three or four shifts), it was usually too late. He’d switched it up again. But Peter liked that about him, too. Jamie clearly liked to try new things. It was a good sign. 

So, as Jamie placed his order, Peter rushed to fill it before the payment was even processed. Today, Jamie ordered a pumpkin spice latte with extra whipped cream. Pete lucked out. He could make that drink in his sleep! Since the seasonal drink made its yearly debut in September, he was making hundreds of these each day. As he steamed the milk, Jamie looked over and gave him an easy smile. The light danced off his brown skin, his eyes twinkled. Peter felt his cheeks tingle with blush as he returned the grin. Milk frothed and mixed with the pumpkin spice flavor, the drink was almost complete. The payment processor beeped its approval to Jamie, and Peter raced to put the extra whip and autumn seasonings on the drink, meeting Jamie at the passthrough counter and carefully putting the lid on the cup.

As Jamie reached for the drink, Peter slipped a napkin toward him. “Don’t forget your napkins, Mr. Jamie, sir.” He’d written his number on it this morning, in preparation for this very moment.

Jamie smiled again, “Thank you, Peter. I’d hate to get coffee all over my suit.”

“You’re welcome, sir.”

Jamie took the napkin and left without showing signs of having seen the number written on it. All Peter could do now was wait. Waiting was hard. The time ticked by slower than usual today, but finally it was closing time. Peter helped clean up the floor, sweeping, mopping, and wiping frantically. His co-workers joked about him having a hot date, but when Peter blushed they realized he might actually have a hot date! So they pushed him for answers as to who the mystery guy or girl could possibly be. 

“I don’t have a date, guys. It’s just that I - uh - I have school in the morning. You know, senior year and all. Gotta finish strong,” he said.

At this, Tammy the night shift manager, bursted out with her typical hyena-cackle laughter. “Okay, sure Pete, you have school on a Saturday. Dumbass, it’s Friday night. If you didn’t have a date tonight I would be worried. You need to loosen up, Peter. You can’t just stay single forever!”

Peter’s co-workers had no idea he was actually dating, like, five people, so he just grinned and laughed, “I guess you’re right! Well I have to go now, goodbye!” He clocked out and dashed out of the store as quickly as he came in. As he walked home, green apron hanging over his shoulder, visor flipped backwards, he turned on his phone and waited impatiently for the messages to load. One-by-one they came in.

Aunt May: “Just arrived at the port in Jamaica, having a lovely time on the cruise!”

Cap: “Peter, please remember to do your laundry tonight. Your room smells like feet.”

Mr. Stark: [sent you a picture message]

Ned: “LEGO building party tonight at Josh’s, are you coming? 10pm.”

Pepper: “Morgan says hi!”

MJ: “LOL You look so funny in that coffee uniform.”

But nothing from a mystery number that could possibly be Jamie’s. He responded to the messages somewhat halfheartedly, then descended the subway stairs to take the train home. Headphones in, he thought about Jamie’s smile as he was ordering. His chest felt tight again, blood pumping, music blasting. He daydreamed until his stop, then took the headphones out for his walk home. He entered the tall apartment building and took the elevator up to the top. Nothing but the best for Tony Stark and his family! The penthouse smelled of a home-cooked meal. It was Cap’s turn to cook, so they were bound to have a feast. Rhodey was setting the table and greeted him first.

“Peter! How was work?” He laid down the last fork at the big oval dining table.

“It was good, I made some tips today!” Peter put on an extra layer of cheer to compensate for the disappointment of not hearing from Jamie.

“That’s great, Pete.” Rhodey was Peter’s metamour, Tony being their shared partner. Occasionally there was tension between them. It wasn’t jealousy, but they were known for calling each other out on their bullshit, and Peter could tell Rhodey’s bullshit detector was going off.

But before Rhodes could say anything, Steve Rogers walked in carrying a turkey pot pie. His kiss-the-cook apron, denim cut-off booty-shorts, and crab-claw oven mitts really made for a unique kind of vibe far and away from the Captain America the rest of the world saw. The daisy dukes certainly showed off America’s Ass in the least wholesome of ways. Peter and Rhodey both gulped, eyeballing that thicc snack as Cap bent over the kitchen table and set it at the center. The pot-pie didn’t look too bad either. Both had been interested in Steve for quite some time, but were not sure how to approach that, since he was so newly out of the closet.

“Where’s Tony?” Steve asked, pulling the oven mitts off and reaching back to untie his apron.

“I don’t know, I just got home,” Peter shrugged, heading up the loft stairs.

Steve turned to Rhodey and asked, “What’s up with the kid? He seems off.”

Rhodey wrapped an arm around Steve’s waist and pulled him close, “Don’t you ever take that apron off.” He grinned, then released Steve and headed to the kitchen to grab the green beans and bread rolls. Steve stayed stuck there for a moment, trying to control the blush that spread across his face before going upstairs to check on Peter and find Tony.

Since Peter’s room was down the hall from Tony’s workshop, Steve decided to stop there first. He poked his head in and spotted Pete sulking at his desk, staring listlessly at his phone. Pete didn’t notice him, so he observed and admired for a minute before knocking and entering. “Hey Pete, don’t you have laundry to do?”

Startled, Peter jumped up and threw his phone under his bed. “Yes, that’s exactly what I came in here to do, laundry.” Frantically, he searched for the laundry basket. Unable to find it, he quickly picked up some of his dirty clothes and balled them up in a pile in his arms. Once his hands were full, he used his toes to pick up the boxers and socks that littered the floor.

“Pete…” Steve tried to get his attention.

“I know, Mr. Rogers it smells like feet in here…”

“Pete… well, I mean yes it does but Peter—” he stepped in front of the teen. “Peter, stop.”

“What?” Peter was clearly upset, though his face wasn’t visible behind the pile of clothing that filled his arms.

“Put the laundry down.”

“But my room smells like feet…”

“Peter.”

“Fine,” he dropped the laundry on the floor, then plopped defiantly on the bed. “What.”

Steve sat gently beside Peter. “Pete, you’re upset.”

“I am not upset, I’m fine.”

“Did you have a rough day at work?” Steve scooted closer, leaning into Peter. He smelled sweetly of coffee. Peter said nothing. “You can tell me, I’ll keep a secret.” He wrapped a reassuring arm around Peter’s shoulders.

The young man looked up at him, eyes red from both tiredness and emotions. “There’s a guy.”

“A guy?” Steve had only come out of the closet three months ago. He could feel the blush coming back to his cheeks. He glanced toward the door, secretly hoping Tony would come in and fix everything. Tony could always fix anything, especially Peter’s broken heart.

Pete sniffed. “He’s a customer. His name is Jamie.”

Suddenly suspicious, Steve perked up. “Is he the reason you turned off your police scanner and keep picking up extra shifts at the shop?”

Peter rolled his eyes and sighed. “You have no idea. How hot. He is. Like, he walks in the room and I can’t breathe. And he doesn’t even know I exist beyond that I am some guy in a green apron who works at a coffee shop.”

“I know what you mean, sport, but you so many of us here who adore you, you know?”

“I know, but…” Peter stopped and suddenly realized what Cap was insinuating, “Wait a second… Mr. Rogers are you saying you’re—?”

Just then Tony knocked on the door. “I hope I’m not interrupting.”

Steve stiffened up and suddenly there was a whole 12 inches between him and Peter. “Hey Tony! Peter had a rough day at work. I told him he needs to do his laundry… ah… dinner is ready, bye!” Steve bolted out of the kid’s room and down the stairs before Tony or Peter had a chance to respond.

“What’s his deal?” Tony asked, sitting down in the warm spot where Steve’s butt just was.

“I think… actually I really don’t know, Mr. Stark.” Peter stood to pick up his clothes.

“Hey, kid, come here for a second.” Tony pulled Peter back onto the bed and pinned him down, his mechanical hand caressing Peter’s cheek. Peter had a momentary flashback to that day but shook it out of his head. He focused on Tony’s piercing eyes.

“You are clearly not okay. And from what I heard, because you know I hear everything that goes on in this house, it has to do with some boy at work?”

Peter rolled his eyes. “It’s nothing…”

“Yes, that’s absolutely right, it is nothing. Hey. Look at me, kid.” He waited until Peter turned his head and made eye contact. “Whoever this guy is, maybe he’s cute. Maybe you even gave him your number on that little napkin from breakfast, but in the end when you’re like us, like you and me and Cap and Bruce, you just can’t date civilians. It never works out. They don’t understand the pressures of the job... or worse: they get killed. Ask any super hero you’ve ever met.”

“But you and Pepper—”

“Yes, Pepper is a special lady who also does the super hero things from time to time. Pep and I have a kid together, but there were years of turmoil before Morgan was born. Stick with what you have, dating outside our kind will only make it hard for you in the end.”

Peter sighed. “I guess… you’re probably right. He’s just so handsome, I… there’s something about him.”

“Pete, I’m not saying don’t go knocking on that door, I’m just saying… be safe about it.”

***NSFW INCOMING. Look for the 3 asterisks at the end of this passage if you wish to skip the naughty stuff.***

Peter glanced up at Tony, feeling flush. Thinking about Jamie, feeling the weight of Tony pressing down against him, it had all started to become a little too much. His hard-on strained against the fabric of his black work pants. “Tony, I…”

“I know, kid,” Tony went in for a kiss. They were still eager and new, Peter only having turned 18 less than three months ago, but the kiss was so familiar and comforting. Tony pulled back and smiled, unbuttoning Peter’s pants. “I don’t want you thinking about that guy anymore. It’s just you and me in here, alright?” He pulled out Pete’s member and rubbed a finger at the base of the head.

“Yes, Mr. Stark, sir…”

“It’s Tony.” He palmed Peter’s cock, then slowly stroked.

Peter could only whimper in response.

“Good boy.” He released Peter. “Get naked for me, I have something I want you to try on.” Tony left the room to grab the skimpy maid outfit from his bedroom closet while Peter disrobed and hastily threw his dirty laundry in a pile in the closet. 

As Peter cleaned, he muttered to himself, “I really should have listened to Cap and done this last week… Where’s that fabreeze?”

Meanwhile, Tony bumped into Steve on his way to their shared bedroom at the other corner of the massive loft. “Steve, what’s up with you today?”

“What are you talking about?” Steve feigned coolness.

“Do you have a thing for Pete?”

“Who? Pete? The kid? Nah. Not me.” Steve sped up, walking quicker toward the bedroom, but Tony caught up with him easily.

At the doorframe, he stopped him, cornered him, pushed him back against the wall. “Steve, I want you to join us.” His lips were so close to Steve’s. Steve quivered.

“Join you?” Steve chuckled nervously, turning red again. “Tony, even if I liked him, how could I handle both of you at once?”

“Yep, that’s it you’re coming with me.” Tony gripped Steve’s forearm tight with his bionic hand and pulled the protesting Captain back toward Peter’s room. The maid outfit could wait for another day, but breaking Steve in with another young buck had to happen someday... and today was as good as any!

By the time they entered the room, Peter had made it spotless. Not a single smell of feet to be found. Tony and Steve both knew he had probably just shoved everything in his closet, but the bed was made and the desk was cleared and the room smelled nicely of linen fabreeze. Peter was nude, sitting on the bed, waiting patiently for Tony to return with some outfit or other. He was shocked to see Steve Rogers standing in the doorway beside Tony, looking shyly down, cheeks frosted rose.

“Mr. Stark… you said you wanted me to try something on… D-do you want me to try on Mr. Rogers?” His voice broke a bit.

Stark sighed. “Kid, how many times do we have to tell you? it’s Tony. And Steve. And... there was a change of plans. Remember how I said it would be only you and me in here?” Pete nodded, swallowing hard as he saw Steve’s growing erection through the tight daisy dukes he’d donned to prepare dinner. “Well, now it’s you and me. And Steve.”

“S-steve, sir, I would love that... it’s just…” Pete had never seen Captain America be so shy. “I think your dick might ruin me…”

Steve glanced at Peter. Tony glared at Steve. “Say it, Cap. Go on! Tell him.”

“Peter.” Steve was looking at him lustfully, passionately now. “I want you. I want you to take me. I need you... I need you inside of me.”

Peter gave a breathy sigh. Partly from the way Cap’s words made his own dick throb, and partly from relief that he wouldn’t have to try to take the horse-sized dong that seemed to be endlessly growing in Steve’s shorts. He stood, approached Steve, and smiled. “I would like that very much.” He glanced over at Tony, unable to hide his surprise and apparent elatedness that Steve was in fact a bottom, and also that his dick really was that huge.

*** End NSFW Section***

So, that’s it for now! What do you think of part one? Do you like the partition for the SFW vs. NSFW content? What do you think will happen next? Part 2 takes place the next day. It will be coming soon! Probably tomorrow, or next week, depending on when I find time between work and school.