#get Bastion’s bitch ass!

[fionapplespiano]

HIS NAME WAS GAMBIT. REMEMBER IT!

[luvrsux]

a/n: take this until i’m done writing requests and other fics luvs ♡

ONE PIECE HEADCANONS #2

Overwatch Mains!

❝ giving each strawhat + more an overwatch hero they'd play. comment on suggestions i should do! :3 ❞

MONKEY D. LUFFY - Tracer

╰┈➤ I feel like Luffy is so simple enough to play the icon of Overwatch. Luffy was so baffled to see that she was able to teleport and immediately fell in love with the kit. Considering Tracer is also a flanking character, he'd be in the middle of the enemy team causing havoc. Will NOT touch support

Luffy: WOAH SHE CAN TELEPORT???? THATS SO COOL

Other Choices: Reinhardt as Tank, Junkrat as second Damage

RORONOA ZORO - Genji

╰┈➤ This is such an obvious choice, there's no need to explain. He rocks the Sentai skin on Genji or just his regular no-skin outfit just for the green. He's the only hero he has with gold weapons and the highest ranked. He insta-locks this man whenever he's playing.

Sanji: Do you play anyone else Mosshead???

Zoro: Just shut up and heal me if you want to win, cook

Other Choices: Doomfist as Tank

VINSMOKE SANJI - Cole Cassidy

╰┈➤ I feel like Sanji connects with Cassidy's charm and smoking habits so he plays him often. He knows Cassidy is the lover boy of the Overwatch community and everyone obsesses over him so he took that as an opportunity to main him. Sanji's second-best class is support but only really pays attention to Nami's health. Won't heal anyone else (especially Zoro) unless they're shouting at him.

Zoro: SWIRLY BROWS, CAN YOU HEAL ME? IM AT 20 IN THE MIDDLE OF A FIGHT

Sanji: WELL MAYBE IF YOU STOPPED JUMPING SO MUCH ID HEAL YOU. LET ME HEAL MY SWEET NAMI FIRST

Zoro: I DIED ANYWAYS I HOPE THEY KILL YOU

Other Choices: Mercy and Ana as Support

GOD USOPP - Widowmaker

╰┈➤ This choice is so obvious. Widow is a sniping character, and so is Usopp. He is a menace to Widow and doesn't even know it. He likes how Widow isn't meant to be on the actual battlefield but more on the sidelines picking off the enemy teams. He screams like a bitch when someone flanks behind him though.

Usopp: Okay, I killed their supports we should be good- *A Tracer comes up from behind* LUFFYYYYYYYY THERES SOMEONE ON MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Luffy: Oh sorry Im in spawn :p

Other Choices: Lucio as Support, Hanzo as second Damage

NAMI - Kiriko

╰┈➤ Nami definitely loves Kiriko for her more angsty personality that no one likes. She'd rather help in the backlines than deal with fighting up front, but she puts the kunais to WORK. Sanji is always on her tail and targets anyone who tries to or manages to kill her.

Nami: Dang it, I died. Try to hold out a little longer guys-

Sanji: WHO DID IT NAMI????? ILL KILL THEM FOR YOU MY SWEET

Other Choices: Brigette as second Support, Ashe as Damage, D.va as Tank

TONY TONY CHOPPER - Mercy

╰┈➤ Chopper will mainly play any support but Mercy is his top choice. He tries to revive anyone he can even in the tightest of situations. He is the best healer you can get, but he can also be a great tank. But our lil baby gets stressed...

Chopper: IM COMING LUFFY DONT WORRY

Zoro: Chopper, can you damage boost me?

Chopper: YEAH IN A SEC-

Sanji: Chopper revive! That Zenyatta is so low!

Chopper: IM TRYINGGGGGGGG

Other Choices: Orisa and Wrecking Ball as Tank

NICO ROBIN - Moira

╰┈➤ There is no possible way Nico doesn't play Moira. I feel like she's more DPS Moira than anything but still upholds good support for her team.

Other Choices: Sombra as Damage, Lifeweaver as Support

FRANKY - Reinhardt

╰┈➤ Franky is 100% the crew's Tank main. He knows every tank playstyle from top to the very bottom but his favorite is of course the loudest one there. Franky is the most reliable tank you can get. He insta-locks Rein and adores him to the very end.

Sanji: I think you should switch, Franky they have a few counters-

Franky: Ill still kick their asses, I dont care Im playing Reinhardt

Other Choices: Bastion as Damage

SOUL KING BROOK - Junkrat

╰┈➤ Brook finds ruining people's day by playing the most annoying character on the roster the funniest thing ever. He laughs when Junkrat laughs manically. It's such a fitting choice for his personality

Other Choices: Reaper as second Damage

PORTGAS D. ACE - Solider: 76

╰┈➤ He is such a straightforward person enough to play Solider but be dope good at it. Ace would be the type of person to get ahead of themselves and over-extend though.

Sabo: ACE ACE YOURE OVER EXTENDING I CANT HEAL YOU-

Ace: Huh? *dies* Oh my bad

Sabo: Ill get off right now.

Luffy: BAHSKAKAHAIAHA WHY HE DIE LIKE THATAHSAA-

Other Choices: Torbjorn for second Damage

SABO - Baptiste

╰┈➤ Sabo is definitely a good damage support hero. He loves Bap for his sweet personality yet dark backstory similar to his own. He can't stand playing with 2 reckless damages every time though (Luffy and Ace)

Luffy: Saboooooo why didn't you heal meeeeeee :(

Sabo: YOURE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE MAP IM SORRY???

Other Choices: Zenyatta as second Support, Echo as Damage

TRAFALGAR D. WATER LAW - Ramattra

╰┈➤ I see Law playing the most complex Tank in the game but Law can play almost anyone on the roster if he feels like it. He barely gives out any callouts unless he is raging like crazy

Luffy: Imma go in and kill everyone

Law: ...

Zoro: I need help over here not gonna lie

Law: ...

Sanji: I think Im gonna switch-

Law: CAN THIS SYMMETRA STOP PLACING TURRETS ON OUR SPAWN OH MY FUCKING-

Other Choices: Reaper as Damage, Mercy as Support

EUSTASS KIDD - Roadhog

╰┈➤ Kidd is definitely a one-trick and only for the most annoying tank in the game. Killer is definitely his pocket healer and will yell at anyone who comes after his skills in the slightest

Law: Kid please pick another tank, you're doing terrible

Kid: WHAT??? FUCK YOU SAY

Luffy: YOU SUCK

Kid: I COULD BEAT BOTH OF YOU IN A 1V1 RIGHT NOW-

thats all! i hoped you enjoyed the little dialogues hehe

[song-writer-melo-wrath]

~tag game~

rules: reblog this and say “rest in peace [your OC], you would have loved…” then tag your pals!

Thank you to @1000punks for the tag, always a pleasure <3

[looks at OC amount] … Oh. Oh goodness. Athy are we really doing this.

Well, let me get my tags out of the way now, @spiderin-space and @nova-moshi because I love their characters.

@hefkerut cause I've seen them mentioned a few times and would love to know more.

I think in other cases, I don't know if they like being tagged or not, or don't know if they have OCs or not, so if you see this and want to OC ramble, say I tagged you, it's an honorary tag <3

Now, let's run through them, shall we? I'll try going alphabetically. You might want to sit down.

RIP Acolith, you would have loved Sakura festivals.

RIP Adamantine, you would have loved “gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss” posts.

RIP Adonis, you would have loved I'm Just Ken.

RIP Aged-Berry, you would have loved The Phantom of the Opera. And Tangled.

RIP Aikungi, you would have loved, nay, DEVOURED Naruto.

RIP Aldur, you would have loved drive in theatres.

RIP Amber, you would have loved candied insects.

RIP Ambrosia, you would have loved homemade beanies from Etsy.

RIP Anon, you would have loved the universal dislike of Anish Kapoor.

RIP Applesweet, you would have loved the fact that I gave you a different name, then forgot it. Girl I am so sorry. I'll work on it. You're still gonna be nicknamed that though.

RIP Arctic, you would have loved various authors dunking on J. K. Rowling.

RIP Arianna, you would have loved the song Dusk Till Dawn.

RIP Ash, you would have loved tone indicators.

RIP Ashlynn, you would have loved dry-clean services.

RIP Aspyn, you would have loved (and did, in fact, love) the Heathers musical.

RIP Astral Querie, you would have loved Lovebot.

RIP Astriel, you would have loved the MCR reunion tour.

RIP Athmoth, you would have loved the resurgence of bardcore, musical theatre, and the use of piano and music box in lo-fi.

RIP Bandit, you would have loved the choker section of Etsy.

RIP Bastion, you would have loved the video game you were inspired by: Bastion.

RIP Behemoth, you would have loved the memes about Ea-nāṣir

RIP Beregiso, you would have loved the fact that Dance Dance Revolution still has new games.

RIP Callie, you would have loved kites made in the shape of cute things like butterflies!!

RIP Caramel/Karma, you would have loved silly string.

RIP Cassandra, you would have loved Lacroix. I like my Lacroix the way I like Cassandra. I don't like Lacroix.

RIP Cat's Eye Apatite/Kat, you would have loved the increasing amount of pockets being put back in skirts/dresses.

RIP Celine, you would have loved Cheesecake Factory.

RIP Cinnabar, you would have loved girl in red.

RIP Chidimma, you would have loved and laughed your ass off at the “is it blue and black or white and gold” dress.

RIP Chuko, you would have loved Bubblegum Bitch by Marina and the Diamonds

RIP Claymin, you would have loved the amount of embroidery patterns you can find online.

RIP Creation/Pebbles, you would have loved the crab rave video.

RIP Cricket, you would have loved the Necronomicon.

RIP Culpin, you would have loved sorbet places.

RIP Cyan, you would have loved liquid glitter phone cases.

RIP Dahlia, you would have loved online gothic lolita shops.

RIP Danyacree, you would have loved tarot cards.

RIP Daphne, you would have loved 4D chess.

RIP Dawn, you would have loved the concept of ukulele apology songs, and then gone “wait, the first one was due to WHAT?!”

RIP Dayo, you would have loved Joshua Weissman's channel.

RIP Delphinium, you would have loved Pink. Possibly Halsey as well.

RIP Destruction, you would have also loved the crab rave video.

RIP Devil Wood Razoda/"Razzy", you would have loved Chicago (the musical)

RIP Dextropho, you would have loved prosthetic stickers.

RIP Dione, you would have loved Owl City.

RIP Dusk, you would have loved melatonin.

RIP Dushun, you would have loved temporary tattoos.

RIP E-302, you would have loved ENA

RIP Eden, you would have loved Troye Sivan.

RIP Eflores, you would have loved flower symbolism websites.

RIP Eko, you would have loved Amy Rose.

RIP Ellum, you would have loved sensory deprivation tanks.

RIP Eodel, you would have loved Post Modern Jukebox.

RIP Euphy, you would have loved the “FUCK YOU BALTIMORE” video.

RIP Fable, you would have loved remote jobs.

RIP Fate, you would have loved Dutch Bros.

RIP Fang, you you would have loved cybercore masks.

RIP Fiona, you would have loved online hair styling tutorials.

RIP Flaveo, you would have loved virgin cocktails.

RIP Fleur, you would have loved slam poetry gatherings. And Queer Eye.

RIP Gecko Gleeble, you would have loved learning to play Riptide and Soul Sister.

RIP Harper, you would have loved Weird Al.

RIP Hazel, you would have loved Studio Ghibli movies.

RIP Helios, you would have loved solar panels.

RIP Hemlocke, you would have loved the legalization of weed.

RIP Honeycomb, you would have loved Once Upon A Time. And Tangled.

RIP Hope, you would have loved cat ear headphones.

RIP Hyacinth, you would have loved community gardens and TeamTrees.

RIP Ilya, you would have loved Influence by Robert Cialdini.

RIP Incar, you would have loved Imagine Dragons.

RIP Inigo, you would have loved Lin Manuel Miranda.

RIP Iris, you would have loved Star Wars. Nnnnot so much the third trilogy.

RIP Jasmine, you would have loved Domino's.

RIP Jefferson, you would have loved the Hercule Poirot movies. Especially the last one, you'd get so much closure.

RIP Karuko, you would have loved the fireworks shows at Butchart Gardens.

RIP Kerinth, you would have loved Fire Emblem.

RIP Kirino, you would have loved the fact that the lesbian flag now has orange. And the internet's love of frogs.

RIP Lemming, you would have loved nature documentaries.

RIP Ladyfingers, you would have loved Epic the musical.

RIP Larth, you would have loved Dracula the Musical.

RIP Lamya, you would have loved Berrywitched.

RIP Lavender, you would have loved the concept of counting sheep.

RIP Lavender (yes, I have two of them), you would have loved mobiles.

RIP Locket, you would have loved popcorn machines.

RIP Lucastamine, you would have loved Dungeon Meshi.

RIP Mal, you would have loved 90s kpop.

RIP Maldue, you would have loved Renaissance Fairs.

RIP Marble Fondant, you would have loved Bob Ross.

RIP Maximus, you would have loved The Greatest Showman.

RIP Mayday, you would have loved rhythm games.

RIP Melody, you would have loved hyperpop.

RIP Monelia, you would have loved Mitski.

RIP Morose, you would have loved Wolfwalkers. And Turning Red. And the live-action The Little Mermaid…except for how they made Flounder look.

RIP Mysterium, you would have loved Vocaloid as a whole.

RIP Mythos, you would have loved The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

RIP Narcoma, you would have loved Poppy in her metal era.

RIP Naonë, you would have loved both Hades and Hades 2.

RIP Nym, you would have loved 60s love songs. And the British Baking Show.

RIP Nystil, you would have loved sparkle GIFs.

RIP Olivia, you would have loved dodie.

RIP Oliphant, you would have loved Skyrim.

RIP Opsys, you would have loved the Trouled Birds series.

RIP Othello Onyxus/Thello, you would have loved r/Piracy.

RIP Pallas, you would have loved Hollow Knight.

RIP Pale Bloodstone, you would have loved Hazbin Hotel.

RIP Palharine, you would have loved Celeste.

RIP Paprika, you would have loved pretzel places.

RIP Perlif, you would have loved Shape of You by Ed Sheeran.

RIP Petal, you would have loved both Frozen movies.

RIP Phantom, you would have loved dubstep.

RIP Phanny, you would have loved skydiving.

RIP Pidoth, you would have loved blumineck.

RIP Pietro, you would have loved the “jk…unless” meme.

RIP Popleir, you would have loved Mothman.

RIP Pyrlotarius, you would have loved Greek amphitheatres.

RIP Recedes, you would have loved The Princess Bride.

RIP Rowley, you would have loved r/nostupidquestions

RIP Royal Fondant, you would have loved Happy Tree Friends

RIP Serendipity, you would have loved the rising trend of girls who call themselves soft but are actually absolutely batshit.

RIP Silica, you would have loved Alec Benjamin.

RIP Sinistropho, you would have loved the Lockwood and Co books, but NOT the show.

RIP Skylar, you would have loved Barnes & Noble.

RIP Solaris, you would have loved Life is Strange. Even if it's not that good of a game, it's fun to play with friends, and has its moments.

RIP Streak, you would have loved drunk karaoke. Or really, just. Karaoke. You'll get there.

RIP Stidgeon, you would have loved horoscope newsletters.

RIP Summer River, you would have loved A Sound of Thunder.

RIP Song, you would have loved speedrunners.

RIP Tamia, you would have loved uquiz.

RIP Tanuki, you would have loved the Nintendo 3DS Eshop music.

RIP Tecwyn, you would have loved the increasing diversity of people in scientific fields. Especially trans women and furries.

RIP Tivity, you would have loved Animal Crossing.

RIP Venn, you would have loved Twilight, but not for the usual reasons people like Twilight.

RIP Venus, you would have loved the ever-rising appreciation for BUFF 👏 WOMEN 👏

RIP Victor, you would have loved Vaporwave.

RIP Victoria/Vicky, you would have loved Buffy the Vampire Slayer

RIP Vio, you would have loved the web-weaving tag on Tumblr.

RIP Vulciadis, you would have loved the continued existence of gospel music.

RIP Warwick, you would have loved 3d printing.

RIP Wester, you would have loved weather vanes.

RIP Wrath, you would have loved Burning Man.

RIP Withanix, you would have loved huge earrings.

RIP Wonwite, you would have loved “daily ___” blogs.

RIP Qwerty, you would have loved the Unipiper.

RIP Yintu, you would have loved the utter failure of NFT bros.

RIP Yulmix/Mimi, you would have loved the phrase “comfort the afflicted, afflict the comfortable”

RIP Yume, you would have loved “is the ___ video cute” blogs.

RIP Ziah, you would have loved the meme of giving Roombas knives.

RIP Zinnia, you would have loved the cottagecore side of the internet.

+ a few more but ohhh wow is this making Tumblr load slower.

[knuckleheadmsm]

My current Kingdom Hearts Experience.

Hiya! So, let me just get straight to the point. Back when i was like, 6-7 ish, i used to play kingdom hearts religiously on my cousins PS3. (mind you, i just ran around and killed random heartless and bosses, i sucked majorly and left all the story to my cousin lol) Recently, I got a PS4, and then Playstation+, which kingdom hearts (all of them) is free on! So i was like, hey, fuck it. Nostalgia needle baby!!! And so i downloaded the game and. My sibling in Galvana. This game is absolutely KICKING MY ASS. Im currently in Hollow Bastion at the Riku fight and good lord hes bending my knees backwards and calling me a satyr. I thought fucking Clayton was hard when i fought him, Maleficent was a pain in my scrote, but RIKU. FUCKING RIKU. I dont have silly dog guy or loud angry duck wizard to help me so when i heal i gotta run away like a little bitch, and thank god i have the leaf thing equipped so that he cant hurt me when im healing. But anyway, I’ll post another thingy when i beat him! Wish me luck, you quesadillas in my phone.

[grigori77]

Critical Role, Campaign 3 Episode 67

Wow ... what was said before the start to cause THAT reaction from Matt? XD

Sam Riegel advert making of? Oh boy ... yes. Give that man a raise! Yeah, that one was almost PAINFUL ...

Matt: "BALDUR'S GATE III!!!" Sam: "Ah!" Matt: "Sorry, had to scare you a bit there."

I live how Laura always gets so adorably WORKED UP and overly enthusiastic when she plugs stuff, it's too cute. :3

Nott the Brave action figure ... Sam: "I get two? I get two and you guys only get one?"

The light's all red. Why's the light all red? This is worrying ...

Wow ... the taint jokes have started already ... Matt's making a list, you know he is ...

Stop with the smoking peer pressure, Letters. That's not cool ...

Chet was a beat poet? Oh and clearly he was a BAD one ...

And here we go ... is Imodna finally gonna become publicly official in the group? Wow, look at them both squirm ...

They really are going the whole religious debate route these days, aren't they? There's true believers and agnostics and essential atheists galore and it's fascinating ...

Ashton: "I'm abstaining." FCG: "You're abstaining? From being undecided?"

Yes, so Ashton was basically born into a freaky dark druidic cult ... no wonder he's such a mess ...

Chetney: "And you were jettisoned-slash-ejected from their bowels?" Boy, what an image ...

Mediocre first roll, Travis ... looks okay, but y'know ...

Yeah, I agree with Ashton. Found family rules.

Some VERY NICE perception rolls indeed, there.

Ooooh ... wisps? Dead soldier ghost wisps? Lovely ... that can't be good ... this is giving me major LOTR Army of the Dead vibes ...

Dodged an interception point? TWO, even? Phew ...

Pate gets chucked again ... what a life he has ...

Yeah, I think actual REAL eyes would make Pate considerably MORE unsettling ...

Persistent bad smell ... hmmmmm ...

Unfamiliar topography? Hmmmm ... sounds suspiciously like a volcano ...

Xandis' spyglass? Wow, that's from a while back ...

Petty non-Guidance ... way to get back at Orym there, Fearne ...

Another taint joke. Travis: "Don't do it, Matthew! Ignore the bloodlust."

Laura sneezes. FCG: "Are you allergic to butt-buttercups?" Another tick. Taliesin: "Please don't hold it against us. We can't help ourselves."

Bad stealth check? Yup, that is DEFINITELY karma coming back to bite you guys in the arse ...

Here we go ... incoming! What's this shit? Oh hell ... ugly shit!

Is it harpies? Is that what it is?

Spirit Guardians? Cool ... they're sheets of glass? That's hilarious. XD

Yeah! 16 Radiant damage! And a MISS!!! Phew!

Nice hit, Imogen! Smack that ass ...

Bait and Switch! Yay! Love that move.

A piercing shriek ... that DOES DAMAGE?!!! Argh! And it hurts Imogen DESPITE the Circlet? Shit ...

Ashton Wrecklessly Rages and POUNDS the fucker for 23 points of damage in a single hit! Ouch!

Chetney wolfs out WITH FLAMES and charges ... and a flying grapple? Oh fuck ... that is BRUTAL!!! Nice ...

It smells ... PUNGENT. Apparently ...

Silvery Barbs! Yay! Love that.

"TRAVIS, I'M PREGNANT!" Sam's flask is next level tonight ...

Eldritch Blast! And Laudna just ANNIHILATES one of 'em ...

Burning Hands! Always fun ... burn that bitch, Fearne! 11 points of Fire damage? Oh, MORE?!!! An extra 8 points for 19? Ouch ... Chetney takes some too but just GOES WITH IT ...

Yeah, Sam's taint joke just doomed them all, looks like ...

Shocking Grasp! Go, Imogen! Nice, it hits ... 9 Lightning Damage ... HDYWTDT!!! Yeah ... and now it's ash.

Yeah, looks like it would be prudent to LEAVE this place, and sharpish.

Leaving at a full run ... thanks to a really shit perception roll the bird things DO NOT follow ... phew ...

Ah, so that thing's some kind of fort? Made of COPPER?!!! What's that about?

Perception! Liam: "Ah, that's low for me ... 19." XD My gods ...

The smell is burning dead? Great ...

Grim Psychometry? That sounds FASCINATING ...

The Iridon Bastion ... built to honour the Platinum Dragon and guard the ground ... hmmmmm ...

Oh so this place FELL, and RECENTLY? That's not good ... just a few days ago ...

Come on guys just STOP pulling the tiger's tail! Matt's gonna make you pay dearly for all these taint jokes ...

Down With the Sickness ... thank you, Travis. XD

How to go in ...

Splitting the Party to approach from 2 sides ... hope this doesn't bite them in the arse ...

Climbing crew first, then ...

Oh yes, this place has taken a beating ... and the dead have been BADLY mistreated ... there are imps still there messing with the remains? Lovely ... oh, so there's demons galore down there ... lovely ...

Cages? And there are survivors? Okay ...

And they're building something in there ... great ...

Here we go then, Battlemap time ...

Oh, and that is SWEET ...

Something flying in? What's this now ... 13 feet tall? Holy shit ... and it has tiny baby legs ... charming ... Travis' reaction to the mini is hilarious ... XD

They're going to summon something ... snd then have a party. With live food ... urgh ...

So, attack all at once or come in sneaky and pick them off one by one? Distraction, maybe? Hmmmm ...

Whoa ... somebody else is here? On OUR side? Potentially, at least ... this could be helpful ... who is that?

Some weird looking demon dude, but not on THESE things' side ... what is this? IS THIS help?

Okay, so they ARE gonna make a distraction ... and Fearne just shouts "HELP!!!"

Imogen deals the whole tower-top of demons a MASSIVE psychic blast ... 33 points of damage? Holy fuck ... and she pops TWO HEADS on the spot, just one left and REALLY confused now ...

Here we go, then ...

Transformation of Dread for Laudna ... and in they GO!!! Featherfall ... yup, that's pretty essential for success here! Catch Orym before he splats, Laudna!

Orym casts Gust AND shoots out a vine with Seedling ...

Oh, so we finally find out what the new thing on Ashton's hammer does ... he put the Immovable Rod IN HIS HAMMER?!!! Ashton you are a fucking GENIUS!!!

FCG Commands these two flying things to Mime. Just MIME ... oh boy ... fuck, and they fail their check so they LITERALLY start miming ... dear gods ...

Oof ... that climb is ARSE ...

Go to break!

That might be the best Twitch sub promo yet ...

ROLL INITIATIVE!!!

Flying leap with a flip ... typical acrobatic Orym ... AND he hits ... double hits, 9 snd 9 damage, nice! Badass entrance, wee man!

Lauda NAT20S!!! With enthusiasm ... znd unlocks the cage ... in full Form of Dread so the captives will be TERRIFIED ...

Okay, so who is this guy, anyway? Nice high persuasion roll, Fearne ... 30! Dear gods ... not friends, but no enemies ... whoever this guy is he's really cool ...

MISTER!!! Hi! Flaming shit chucking! 6 points of Fire damage ...

Scramble the Dead? FCG projects the AOL loading sound into the demon's head and gives it 18 points of Necrotic damage! Nice ...

Minute Meteors? Imogen's SWEET ARSE new move ... oh yeah, she us just PELTING these guys with pain ...

Demon guy has a nice big chopper ... oh yeah, he is a bit of a badass as well as being cool snd rakishly handsome ... AND a Divine Smite? Holy fuck he's a Devilish Paladin! Awesome! 84 points of damage ... fucking hell ...

Blood Curse of Bloated Agony! Yeah, boy! And Turmoil, nice ... and he just BUTCHERS that fucker ...

Ashton's Raging again as he tries to free the prisoners ... and batters himself by fumbling his landing ... attack instead, then ... he hits! 23 for the first, 18 on the second ... proper battering that one, then ...

Finally the bad guys' turn ... oh dear, here we go ...

Big stumpy demon VANISHES ... then reappears DIRECTLY ON TOP of one of the cages ... AAAAAAHHH!!!

Chetney gets BIT!!! Ouch ... 10 damage after the reduction ... nasty ...

No, not more painful screeching ... argh! Indomitable saves Orym's arse a little bit ... AND he has resistance against being Frightened ... Nice, he pushes through! Yay ...

Orym responds in kind ... 7 and 10 damage ... it's STARTING to look a little rough? Oof ...

Laudna pops the lock ... and Marisha LITERALLY pop-locks ... XD

Bait snd Switch on Laudna! Nice, Orym!

Okay ... the cage has FINALLY been opened ... everybody OUT!!! Mirror Image! Here we go ... and now she's IN THE CAGE and she's terrifying ... she tries a Ray of Frost on the chains ... this could go SO BADLY ... O.O

Holy shit, that worked! Nice rescue!

Fearne Blasts a Scorching Ray at the closest target, then again at the ones attacking Chetney ... BOOM BOOM BOOM!!! It hurts them, but not that much ... bugger ...

FCG casts Command again, this time to Betray? Holy shit ... wait, did that actually WORK?!!! Oh ... that just gave FCG a free pass instead ... bugger, that could have been a lot more impressive ...

Lightning Bolt IN THE FACE!!! Nice one, Imogen! Balls damage roll though, apparently ... 20? Hmmmm ... nothing spectacular, then ...

Another one on an imp ... for ONE POINT of fire damage? Oof ...

Paladin dude attacks! 30 damage on the first hit? Holy fuck ... Chetney thinks his bame is "Do Your Part" ... Paladin is NOT impressed ...

21 damage including 3 thunder from Chetney, then 20 and finally 19! Fucker's FINALLY starting to look proper hurt ...

Nice, Ashton literally BATTERS a fucker right off the roof and he IMPALES HIMSELF on a spike? I love it ...

Nimbus Fear don't do shit!

That's it for thd bad rolls, then ... oof, how much damage is Imogen taking? 32 from a bite? Aaaaah! 14 slashing, 13 slashing ... oh my GODS ... yeah, NO FUCKING WONDER Laudna screams "NO!!!" at the top of her lungs ...

That fucker just BURSTS like a water balloon ... nice ...

Imp popping out of nowhere and screaming in FCG's face has NO EFFECT at all ... okay ...

Orym just jumps on Imogen's attacker znd starts hacking at him! 13 damage! ACTION SURGE!!! Oh nice! PROPER disarmed it by actually taking its fingers off! Then he drags Imogen up and literally TOSSES HER to Laudna!

Laudna channels a Shocking Grasp through the cage to trash the fucker ... and it totally FAILS?!!! Balls!

Literal Aladdin moment for Imogen and Laudna ... "Do you trust me?" And they're saved by Mirror Image at the last ... phew! Finally Featherfall means they touch down smoothly ... Nice save, girls!

Fearne casts Blight and inflicts 38 points of Necrotic damage! Ouch! Plus another 5 in fire from Mister! Nice ...

Death from above? No ... thank fuck Ashton manages to save from that shit ...

Sacred Flame! Go, Letters! Bad damage roll, though ... 4 Radiant damage? Balls ...

Gods, the bad rolls are starting to balance out now, this is THE WORST TIMING for it ...

Imogen gets 26 HP back from the Healing Potion ... phew ... then shoots a Psychic Lance at the bastard! Half damage, though ... 21 reduced to 11 ... nuts ...

Paladin carves and ... fails SPECTACULARLY!!! Oof ...

Chetney grabs the discarded sword! Oh, this can't lead to anything good ...

Ashton tries to rush past and just gets grabbed, do he just goes on the offensive instead. So he BEATS THE SHIT ot of it ... 20 points of damage and it's OFF HIM again! He climbs rhe tower, the atracks the other one ... Nice, another hit, 28 points! Boom! Then another 17! POW! Just as the fucker jumps off the tower ...

Oh fuck ... HOW MUCH damage is Imogen taking? Fuck ... yeah, Imogen is now UNCONSCIOUS ... as the fucker's CHEWING on her ...

Yeah, Laudna is GOING OFF seeing that ...

Oh, FCG's just getting MOBBED here ... ouch, 9 points of piercing damage ...

I love how that imp just NOPED right out there ...

Orym to the rescue! And he just BATTERS HIMSELF landing on the fucker ... 10 damage, but then NAT20s ... another 12? Hmmm ... but at least it spits Imogen out ...

Laudna Blights him, but only half damage ... crap ... 34 reduced to 17 Necrotic damage ... it hurts, but ... so she tries Shocking Grasp again instead ... and Nat1s ... AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! NOOOOOOO!!! So she just clambers on top of Imogen and shields her with her body ...

Fearne Wildshapes into her Big Bird! She takes a glancing hit but swoops off, grabs FCG and carries him off while having Mister firebomb one of the cage locks ... 13? Nuts ... so that's a miss, then ...

Ashton's so strong he's Teflon ...

Dear gods this is getting EXHAUSTING ...

FCG casts Healing Word on Imogen ... 4 points, but at least she's up again ... then he fires his bolt thrower and just MISSES COMPLETELY ... Marisha: "Does that thing EVER hit?"

Imogen tries to cast Shocking Grasp on the bastard ... and it hits! Nice! 12 points of Lightning damage ... then she casts Invisibility on herself and Laudna, and they both just BOLT. Nice ...

Paladin pulls another Divine Smite ... 45 points on a single hit! And ANOTHER Smite? Oh yeah, he just KILLS that fucker ...

Chetney casts Shatter and deals 17 Thunder Damage reduced to 9 ... then goes to another cage and terrifies its occupants ...

Oh shit, really? Matt Mercer, are you SERIOUSLY giving Chetney a cursed sword? Is that THREE FOR THREE for Travis now? O.O

Shit ... Ashton just DROPS on that boy and batters the fuck out of himself doing it ... misses, unfortunately, but then takes another shot ... ooh, a Chaos Burst? Cool ... oh, that sounds like a PAINFUL hit ...

Crap, it just VAPOURISES away before they can finish it ... it's really hurt, but still kicking ...

Orym doesn't have a viable target so he just goes sprinting after the stumpy fucker ...

Laudna scares the crap out of FCG by talking to him while still invisible, sends him off to help Imogen as she goes to the next cage ...

Fearne swoops in and casts Blight on stumpy ... 38 points of Necrotic ... HDYWTDT!!! YEAH!!! Oh, I think she made a future enemy there, if it ever comes back ...

Oh, okay, Fearne gets to formally meet the Paladin ...

Meanwhile the others are working on freeing the remaining captives of investigate the surroundings. And THERE'S Baernie! Okay! Hi there! Yeah, she gives him s big hug and it's so sweet! She's traumatised but seeing him is clearly just the soothing tonic she needs ...

Tevan Klask? Oh hello then ... oh, and he is CLEARLY only impressed by Fearne ... okay ...

The Knotted Weave? What's that, then?

Oh here we go ... is he gonna try and SEDUCE Fearne to his godly path? Hmmmmm ... wow, he actually KISSES HER HAND!!! Blimey ... and he MARKS HER?!!! Fucking hell ... oh yeah, he is DEFINITELY kind of hitting on her ...

Wow, so she just GOES WITH IT ... okay ...

So now they've got a kind of ally in this ... or at least FEARNE has ...

Sweet ... now THAT'S an exit ...

Nice! Fancy Ashari magic lets Baernie relocate her own shoulder ...

Extovass the Gluttonous ... hmmmm ... a servant of Vrudaliun? Okay ...

Oh NICE!!! Two full packs of the flowers! Yes!

Yet again ... seriously, DO NOT let Travis do the cursed weapon thing again, that way madness lies ...

Taking care of the dead before getting ready to head out, then. Then Baernie leads the way out again. Oh sweet, magic bolthole? Cool ...

Time for a cosy rest, then.

And that's it for the night. Okay then ... thank the gods, that was exhausting and ALMOST really bad too ...

Yup, now it's official, Fearne's, like, the leader now ... I can get behind that ...

[anxresi]

Somehow, I can tell who wrote the script for ‘Derision’...

...The latest leaked script for the bastion of security which is Miraculous Ladybug.

I’ll spare you the predictable scenes set in flashback where Chloe (with the help of that gullible lug Kim and willing assistant Sabrina) covers everyone’s favorite blunette in spiders (didn’t Zoe get cockroaches put in her locker too? WTF is it with this show which considers insects the epitome of bullying?) and covers her ass with green paint (hey, it could’ve been worst! It could’ve been gum... oh.)

The part where it REALLY shows Mr Astruc’s handiwork and how he’s far more manipulative than even Chloe could ever hope to be, stands out in this particular shining moment... 

1. WTF is ‘Rosita’? Is this the Mexican dub, or something?

2. OOH THOMAS YOU SO META WITH YOUR BLATANT EXPOSITION!! But really, you’re using an argument against Chloe fans rivalled only in its disingenuousness by its pure straw man...ibility.

My beef with you regarding Chloe’s development isn’t ‘E-v-i-l people using bad parental treatment as an excuse for their misdeeds’ and more ‘Leading us on a wild goose chase with HOURS of episodes showing Chloe growing both as a person and a superhero, only to abandon all that suddenly to turn her into a wannabe terrorist and psychopath overnight’. Check out TV Tropes. Alpha Bitches do not generally turn from Lovable Alpha Bitches to Complete Monsters in the space of one episode, do they? (Unless of course, you want us all to kneel at the altar of that vast expanse of blandness known as Zoe, but that’s another story...) 

Ways it could’ve been done better: SHOW us during S1 and S2 that Chloe is capable of the mindless thuggery we’ve seen of her more recently. If you’re going to show her pull a Heel-Heel-Face-Turn, do it GRADUALLY in a realistic fashion, don’t just dump it all at the end of S3 by pretending her budding development never happened. And if Zoe was REALLY ‘the true holder of the Bee Miraculous’, how come her name was never even mentioned until the early parts of S4?! I think we’re talking about less of a character here, and more of a placeholder introduced to take on Chloe’s role as a hero because you don’t like her. (Zoe getting Pollen after one-and-a-half episodes was ‘utterly ridiculous’ too, as will be her becoming Chat Noir briefly in a future show(!) But again., that’s a discussion for another time.)

Basically Mr A, you can heap as many humiliating ‘punishments’ upon Chloe as much as you want. Mutilate her once-halfway-complex and potential-filled personality by increasingly marking her as one-dimensionally e-v-i-l to your heart’s content. Insert as much clunky dialogue from the mouths of other characters to get back at your ‘haterz’ if it makes you feel better. Even set entire episodes set in the past designed to make people hate her as much as you do... hey, it’s your show!

But don’t try to pretend any of this was planned. Along with the reasons given above, I don’t think if all this was intended from the beginning, such a MEGA surplus of Queen Bee and Chloe toys would’ve been released... if they always intended her to be one of the most despised characters. It was all done because one man’s blind hatred of a fictional teenager hi-jacked the plot and derailed it from what it could’ve been. At one point at the end of S2, things were ticking along quite nicely. Then YOU got much more heavily involved in the show’s writing... and the rest, as they say, is history.

And no, I am NOT devaluing Marinette’s in-story bullying. I’m more criticizing Thomas’s shameless weaponizing of it to turn this episode into yet ANOTHER stick to beat Chloe with. It disgusts me more and more, to see him paint (pun not intended) a young child as some kind of irredeemable hellspawn incarnate to prop up the kudos of the stereotypically ‘nice’ girl characters around her. Sorry... Marinette, Mylene, Rose and ESPECIALLY Zoe. You’re just boring. CHLOE FAN FOREVER!! :D

So, to conclude... my main reaction to Derision... is complete and utter derision. Just not in the way they intended... ;)

(Someone just left a comment pointing out Mylene’s mother abandoned her. Figures only Thomas would use a side character’s misery as yet ANOTHER excuse to get back at Miss Bourgeois. What’s the betting that this now canonical detail was only put in to denigrate Chloe more? After all, he introduced an entire character for this very purpose, so I wouldn’t put ANYTHING past him now...) :p

[vanilla-poisons]

Go off about the worst Bastion/Misawa headcanons?

OH MY GOD OKAY SO IM ABOUT TO GET MEAN BUT EVERYONE KNOW THAT ALL INTERPRETATIONS ARE VALID AND OPINION AND IDK JUST EAT A BARREL OF SALT BUT-

GUYS MISAWA ISNT A SPOILED POSH STUCK UP BRAT OR A PERV STOP SPREADING THAT AROUNDDDDDDDDDDDD! Literally he worked his ass off and studied hard, it’s not like he was just like that naturally! We are shown scenes of him intensely preparing for duels and different things that happen in GX. Also HES NOT EVEN CLOSE TO BEING STUCK UP!! He’s literally nice to all the students and does not care about their dorms. Chazz fucking chucked his deck into the ocean and despite Alexis and Jaden getting pissed, bastion did not care. Bastion is only rude on accident like when he compliments the opponent in a duel against his friend. He means well and is just like this. He loses to Jaden which means he isn’t the top student but guess what he decides that’s fine and pushes himself to be better!! He’s only a sore loser when you start being a bitch to him or kidnap his friends. Like he is justified when he gets mad at his friends for straight up ignoring his cries for help and when he is abandoned and forgotten for no reason.

For the perv thing I want everyone to remember that bro did not care about romantic shit at all before Tania trapped him, love bombed him and made him her husband. He’s also even not like…disrespectful to the women? Like he expresses interests a couple times and shows he wants female appreciation but that’s it. Also let’s very much note that his so called perv behavior is just…like signs he carries a shit ton of baggage from the Tania thing. Like that deeply affected him he showed signs of depression afterwards and said he wanted to stop dueling…his life passion. Yeah haha furry but also a little fucked up he is still so attached to the woman who had a toxic relationship with him.

Also guys he’s mentally ill and it’s not as funny as people make it out to be

Also also just idk guys cut him slack the writing fucked him over and so many people reduce him to “ha he got laid…noice”

Anyway I love him and remember barrel of salt this is all hyperbole and my opinion

[ambrosialdesire]

I hate how quickly i recognized that logo… WHO HE MAIN?

-🌷

PLS bro definitely is a toxic dps main, yelling at supports when his ass is constantly rushing in without the team 😭 levy’s mains are most likely genji, reaper, and bastion before “ow2” and he constantly bitches about it too and still pays for the battlepass

if he had to play tank, based on experience from comp games (which i never played again after 💀): roadhog and doomfist, sometimes dva or junker queen bc he’s a horny cunt

if he had to play support: which he would never in a million years would, he’s kiriko or zen, maybe lucio BUT NEVER mercy, he’d rather get his balls stomped on

[luvwich]

a ficlet and a mixtape

well i wasn't planning on doing @silverv-week but i cought da bug and even made a whole dang playlist—

i will be posting silverv stuff on ao3 here!

august 4: dreams

"How about dreams, then?"

How'boutem, peaches?

Trailing a bit too far behind V like a disloyal hound, Johnny scuffs his boots on the pavement. Each drag of his heel whispers through her own feet in faint reduplication. She has grown to tolerate these constant echoes much as one gets used to the drafts of an old apartment building.

But she has not gotten used to how damned shifty he is. Getting a straight answer out of him feels like threading an eel through an eyelet half the time. For two people sharing a head, the gulf between them could hardly be wider. She sighs.

"When I'm asleep," she says, "where are you, precisely?"

Same damned place I always am. He turns his head to hock a volley of digital phlegm onto the sidewalk. You think I'm off lounging on a beach in Bali when you're down for the count?

"Christ, Johnny, what'd that pavement ever do to you? Anyway, I thought perhaps you'd experience my REM activity the same as I do." She shrugs. "It's no matter to me if you don't want to talk about it."

Eh. Yeah. Can get sorta a glimpse of what's going on in that little noggin of yours. Tell you what, it's nothin' worth tuning into most of the time. His stride shifts up a gear to catch up with her. It doesn't make sense that he has to do this, but he's overcome by the sensation of falling behind.

"Hm," she says.

She pauses to lean against the trunk of a street lamp, and he's just about to start giving her grief about wasting time, but she lights a cig and the gratitude stills his tongue. Together, they buzz.

This part of Westbrook is barely recognizable. Used to be a filthy bastion for artists, real bohemians, visionaries. Now it's all souvenir stands and false nostalgia. Johnny's disgust filters through the fine mesh of V's psyche and gets pulverized into curiosity. She grips the cigarette like it's a dart, casting her gaze down the bustling avenue.

"I wonder," she says, "what this street looked like when you were alive."

Looked like shit. But it didn't have your dumb ass standing on it, so in that sense, it was better.

She's smiling. Johnny knows she's smiling because he can feel it like a superstition. It is like when you look up at a clock and realize you knew exactly what time it was, somehow, before you looked. That's all she ever does when he needles her, when he scrapes and scuffs, when he's snide and unpleasant and himself. A dulcet little smile, untroubled, serene. He's even felt her do it while she's dreaming.

"Right, then." Smoke blooms from her nostrils. "If you're done being awful to me, we need to make ourselves some money."

They rejoin the crowds, stepping away from the question of dreams. And if he were the engram of someone more brave and resolute than Johnny Silverhand, he might be able to give her the real answer. If a better man were locked up in her mind, that man might find it in himself to admit, yeah, Vania, I see your dreams like I see everything else. I've seen the little flat where you grew up and heard the bells of the church down the road. Felt how much your mother loves you. Shit, that was nice.

He might add: And when things are really fuckin' bad, it's what I cling to. When we're in a dicey situation I find myself thinking, damn, sure hope I get to lay down in her bed again tonight, let those dreams wash over me.

Your mind's like a garden, V, he might tell her. It's all walled-up and overgrown and there's some weeds in there but it's like nothing I've known about being a person. Never knew it was possible to not be haunted. To just dream of things like trees, and perfume, and architecture. And your dreams are a chest of rubies and I wanna tuck myself away in there and never leave, sometimes, you bitch.

But he's indispensably himself, and won't say it.

Now he has fallen behind again. Feels her swishing ahead of him even though they're in the same body, barreling into the future with a hum in her throat. There's still a whole lot of eddies between them and Hellman; sleep is so far away for them both. Johnny rushes to catch up.

[vocalintel]

Toxic Yuri: Or, How I Learned to Start Worrying and Love The Bomb

I am going to go ahead and start throwing punches in my opening paragraph because it's been a while since I wrote a real post of any kind (remember Let's Talk Trans?) and I wanna get my views out there for the parasocial sycophants. I have pretty much always considered myself anti-ship, anti-map, anti-whatever the fuck. It's not necessarily from a position of puritanism, as I often see the opposition argue- I like John Waters movies, for god's sake- but more to do with the state of media literacy on the modern internet in general. It pains me to say something this cruel on a public platform but, frankly, a lot of the people involved in this debate are morons (anime bloggist crawfordpro has written a more eloquent post about this whole issue here, if you want to hear from someone a lot less confrontational than me). As much as I think the argument is just teenagers feeling out how to shape their social identities online, I also want to keep a lid on things and have it put straight out what my beliefs are and what forms the basis of them. Frankly, I am disgusted by grown adults sitting around on the internet that whine about how Mommy and Daddy aren't letting them play with their toys the way they want to. That is how it sounds to me when I see the proship people brag about how the haters will never succeed in taking away their underage incest smut.

Anyway. It's Yuri Day. I will probably also post a Yuri List for Yuri Day. As one does. But I am once again forced to confront the paradox of my values, or what some might call hypocrisy. It might be a sitewide hypocrisy, honestly. I see lots and lots and lots of posts about toxic yuri. About evil women. About bitches. Emotionally fraught codependency and dying like dogs and eating pomegranates. Perhaps it's some dark cynicism in me, a cruelheartedness I need to kill in myself, but a lot of the time I scroll by these posts and think "wow, OP would not survive Revolutionary Girl Utena". To evoke the infamous old post where someone went to see Hereditary in theatre because of Tumblr and then was extremely upset it was scary, I think there's a problem with left-leaning/feminist spaces online in general where everyone loves emotionally complicated women (evil bitches) until they actually read a story with an emotionally complicated woman in it. Everyone, it seems, loves freakin' at the freaker's ball until it starts contradicting their worldviews. Then they run back to their bastions of consumerist slop until it's safe for them to stop seriously thinking about their beliefs again.

And what of the memestatus of Toxic Yuri? The edges get sanded off. The moral complication is simplified down into who deserves to be hurt by the evil bitch and if the bitch is justified enough to do the hurting. Someone always has to be the heroine and someone always has to be the villain. Women can't be unpleasant because it's misogynist and women can't be too nice because it's misogynist, and if a man shows up he either has to be evil enough to justify killing him or weak enough to justify cucking him, sometimes both. There is no escaping everyone getting put into neat little boxes and slapped with a book of social rules detailing exactly how they should be punished for acting out of turn.

Even in more fannish communities where fujoshis rightly create genderbend yuri of their toxic yaoi, this shit happens. The Yuri Zine has an entire essay dedicated to talking about this, in particular highlighting how SQQ/LBH (from Scum Villain Self-Saving System) is softened and made comfy by the yuri girls and their feminization lasers. Why is it that it's fine to fuck a guy in the ass until he nearly dies when you're yaoi but when the story becomes two women there's only a smidge of gentle fingering? Is it wicked and foul of me to want more aggression and toxicity in my yuri? Is everyone reading this slowly coming to the conclusion that I'm American Psycho?

I mean, where are all the violent outpourings of female rage and hopelessness? Isn't that a thing we're supposed to have by now? Am I just looking in the wrong places? Because it's looking to me like even in a culture laying parallel to a largely uncensored, anonymous internet, people just don't want to write about women being aggressive and toxic. Lesbian stories are always about the redemptive power of love and full of gentleness and uncertainty. To put it meanly, a great deal of them are written under the stifling fear that someone somewhere might misconstrue either of the heroines as being predatory if they act outside their box. You can be gay, the yuri plot says, but you still have to act like a woman. The only allowable deviation is the actual lesbophobic stereotypes of hypersexual predators from male-oriented hentai shit. Which, frankly, I wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole. These caricatures ring just as false as their pillow-soft bambi lesbian counterparts.

An absence of cruelty is not kindness. An absence of hatred is not love. I hate how accusatory and mean I sound through all of this, but I just keep coming back to toxic yuri. How what's accepted in m/m fiction, what's accepted in heterosexual fiction, is completely taboo for f/f. I honestly quit reading yuri for a long time because I was so frustrated with this. It's not as though I actively want all women to be heartless sociopaths; I have repeatedly bounced off of girlboss media; movies like The Invisible Man remake and books like Burn The Negative. But there is like the full spectrum of human emotion that women, even in fiction, are seemingly never allowed to experience; and if they do, it has to be by a man's terms.

I know this is getting long. That's why I'm making it its own separate post from my yuri highlight list for the day. Most people probably don't want to be subject to my pathological desire to criticize everything and tear the world up with my teeth.

But like, don't you get tired of it? Don't you ever just get tired of it?

[djpain619]

OPEN PITCH TO GAMES WORKSHOP:

BUGMAN'S RANGER

A Retro Beat em' Up/ Shooter in style of Boltgun (maybe done in N64 style graphics, like Conker's bad fur day, Crash Bandicoot, and Gwimbly)

Set During the End Times (like vermintide) You play as a Norse Dwarf. The Sole member of your clan to survive and escape the Doom of Karaka Drak and the massacre of the Norse Dwarfes at the hands of Valkia The Bloody.

You and a small band of survivors managed to flee to the south on a few passing Thunder barges. Thus you avoid the fate of the Main Body of Norse Dwarf Refugees that tried to escape by the Sea of Claws only to be Slaughtered by the Plaugefleet.

You narrowly miss destruction and make your way to safety, then you resolve to take the Slayers Oath and swear vengeance on Valkia, so you pilgrimage to Karak Kadrin.

At the Gates to Karak Kadrin you are stopped by Josef Bugman Himself who after hearing your tale of woe, says he's been where you are and known your pain. He then proposes that instead of taking the Slayers Oath, that there are Other paths to vengeance.

Bugman: "Well what do you say Lad? Are you a Bad Enough Dawi to fight for BUGMAN'S RANGERS?"

*cue Title Screen and Opening Credits*

--------------------------

So for this game I was thinking your standard load out would be, a Crossbow, Throwing Axes, a Shield, and a two handed Great Axe. I was thinking maybe Ranged combat with the crossbow and throwing axes would zoom into first person and Melee with Axe and Shield and Greataxe would be zoomed out to 3rd person.

I was thinking Logistics would be covered by HEAVY use of Gyrocopters and Thunderbarges. Like Josef Bugman pulls a whole ass sky fleet out of his ass and thats how you get around. And the game missions would be all over the Warhammer World. From Lustria to Nippon, From Kislev to the Southlands.

I was thinking there would be horn you can trumpet for Helldivers style calldowns. Like Gyrobomber carpet bombing runs, Gyrocopter Clattergun strafing runs, Gyrobombers dropping resupply and/or npc reinforcements.

The missions and endgame would culminate in Undoing the End Times and steering events down the Storm of Chaos Timeline. Where Grimgore Ironhide saves to world by kicking Archaon the Everchosen in the Bollocks. Things like saving the Lizardmen, and keeping Cathay's Great Bastion from Falling. Helping Kislev Hold The Line, disrupting a skaven ritual (the feedback of the ritual's failure causes 13 Vermin Lords to Explode, their fragments being scattered across the warp effectively killing them permanently in all the ways that matter) and even discovering Karak Zorn and the Southlander Dwarfs.

The Final Boss for the Player Character would be a final faceoff with Valkia The Bloody, where if you really are a Bad Enough Dawi you kick her ass and send that bitch back to Hell.

Throughout the whole game Josef Bugman would be commenting on your progress and making Duke Nukem style references and irreverent quips. Except in a Sean Connery type accent.

[horsedenial]

Omg twilight is developing a cure. All the bastions of equestria have fallen. Except for some outposts in like the Crystal empire and ponyville. All of the other mane 6 have been infected except for her and fluttershy because I feel like it’d be really funny if fluttershy was there but just utterly useless the whole time. Anyway. Octavia is a complete badass and is one of the main ponies kicking zombie ass out there and vinyl scratch is basically her sad wet cat girlboyfriend but they never say it until it’s too late and vinyl sacrifices her pony life to save her pony girlfriend… wow… and Octavia’s like no.. I can’t let this happen! And twilights like well thems the breaks tough shit bitch. So she DTEALS the serum (omg) and uses it on vinyl but it doesn’t work and she wasted twilights hard work on nothing. And twilight is PISSED until Octavia’s Tears Of True Love land on vinyls horse skin fur (???) and OMG IT WORKS!! OMG!! Or alternatively it doesn’t and she gets bitten and dies. That would be cool too

[brighteyesredfire]

SUPERGIANT ROUNDUP BASTION / TRANSISTOR / PYRE / HADES

compiling thoughts on games ive played. i may go back and edit these over time bc i like to ramble and maybe ill have a thought later about things to add. woo

🌟 BASTION (2011) | 10/10 4 million stars

THE game of all time. i think i bought and played this when the indie humble bundle (one of the first of its kind) slapped it together with limbo, psychonauts, amnesia and sword and sorcery (i have the art jen zee drew to advertise that on my wall still).

remarkable then and now for being a game i replayed like a madman and loved soooooo muuuuuuuuuch its ridiculous. the art direction will always be very impactful on me i think, jen zee i love ur stuff 4ever <3333333 the music is also still incredible, spike in a rail is iconic as ever, and logan cunningham's voice will always hit perfectly on the ears as rucks. this game was also the first major fandom i was in on this site and it could fit inside one tinychat lol, i have retained alot of the friendships i made from it back then, its an experience i can never untie from the actual game.

ive always liked isometric smash and whack games, most likely due to this games influence on me, but it was also just... one of the first big games i loved as a budding tween, so almost everything about i think with fondess, im recalling how the upgrade areas looked like rn and its making me smile. i made an askblog about a character from this game, we made a physical fanbook that got handed to devs at a con (i think the vid of them reacting to it is now lost to time) its deep bro its deep in my bones.

/ spoilers from here /

bastion's story i still also enjoy as dour as it is, and the choice at the end, between continuing the cycle of apocalyptic doom or build a new future with the remains, its still interesting to me. relive the past before it goes wrong and experience the fresh pain over and over or move on with grave of genocide ringing in your ears and the cunt of an old man on the same floating rock with you. augh!

🌟 TRANSISTOR (2014) | 6/10 stars it is a game and i think that's great

played this game front to back full the day it came out on my mothers computer and cried like a bitch at the end while liveblogging it. to this day i remember the combat being too much for my stupid little brain to comprehend and would get my ass beat constantly but the jen zee art and sword boyfriend and my loyalty to SG kept the brain alive.

MAYBE it would less of a pain in the ass for me to play now but the plotting out before you enforce the combo hurt my brain. i dont think ahead okay. ow. ow.

As with all SG games the art was incredible though they drew from really interesting influences for a sci fi take, and this ost with the addition of a bunch more vocal tracks (due to red being a singer) is sooo good. i have a version of the album of the glitched out versions of the songs ripped from the gameplay, delicious nyam nyam.

/ spoilers from here /

the story is like a traditional tragedy and the first showing of some great supergiant #buryyourgays but i still cry like a baby listening to paper boats so FML !!!!!!!!! i think that song affects me more than setting sail / coming home from bastion actually at this point (time to go find the orchestra pax vid and loop it)

🌟 PYRE (2017) | 9/10 starsies supergiant youve done it again

i liked pyre like 10 steps more than transistor its not even funny 😂 the world has a more fantasy leaning bent... the ensemble cast too.... and the gameplay i love this gameplay i will play ghost spirit basketball all fucking dayyyyyyyyyy also this is alot closer to a visnov than the rest of their games, between the sports parts, this is also probably why i really like it, who doesn't love it when their choices matter and little guys talk to them. visnovs are great.

/ spoilers from here /

i also just favour weirdo fantasy > over weirdo sci fi this is pure personal taste lmao. the environments were fun, the conceit of the game was interesting too. making the choice of who to liberate not only be a factor based on who you like and the story but ALSO the gameplay bc you no longer get to play them.... i remember i kept hedwyn around bc i liked him as a character and also bc he was the all rounder class but i did let him go before the end bc i wanted to give him that chance despite never seeing him again... that sort of experience with a character i love is rareeee, ive not had anything like it since. is it better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all..............wohah.............

i also just love the fake language they came up with for people talking, reading being a big deal here also.... so much about this games worldbuilding i loved it i loved it. i think my only issues would be the amount of forced het in the endings people can get lmao I DONT NEED EVERYONE TO GET HAPPILY STRAIGHT MARRIED SG LMFAO.

🌟 HADES (2020) | 10/10 starsies supergiant youve done it again

i have played this game for 250+ hours and 100 of those were during the entire time it was in early access the brain disease real alive and killing me to this day.

genius of SG i think to stretch their storytelling out to be way longer by putting into a rougelike its such a fun idea and it works so well bc of how finely tuned their gameplay always is. they incentivize the right things and the feel is addictive, you wanna get to the characters bc they're always the best part but the gameplay on the way is like butter, ENDLESS GRIND ENDLESS GRIND. GAME YOU PLAY UNTIL YOU DIE

/ spoilers from here /

i like that this story ended up being a dumb greek family drama, i dont have many more thoughts about that aspect though honestly bc i dont really care about greek gods as a setting and i always enjoy SG's original ideas and worlds alot more behehe. their remixes are no doubt fun though.

there's something to be said about the violent catharsis of being killed over and over to leave family i think, im sure i could write some metaphor here about having to confront hatred in loved ones over a choice about yourself actually just feels like dying over and over (im a poet) especially when you still live with them.

i think i actually for real cried the first time zag met his mother like the music and the va, it was all so tragic and sad, i dont think anything else really met that emotional high for me. i was almost surprised later on how happily the game resolves lol but i dont have any qualms with stories about fucked up families actually fixing their problems, hope for the future or something.. ! not all blood ties have to be burned to cinders, its a nice thing.

thanatos is my girlboss boyfriend also i cannnnnoooooootttttt believe they made him a tsundere sadboy who acts like you broke up with him MINUTE ONE OF MEETING THE MAN IN THE FUCKING GAME WHAT IS WRRRRONG WITYH YOUUUU SG YOU SICK FUCKS. i actually puked in my mouth everytime they talked and i was explicitly seeking it out. god of death and god of blood (life) can you go fuck yourselves ACTUALLY.

thank you for letting me bang him and meg at the same time sg also is making up for their lgbt transgressions if only a bit with this one may the next game be gayer. lovewins or something.

[futanariwriter]

The GunShip

Sand-Punk Survivor Ch.2

January 04, 2023

Ch.2 Assembling the Crew 

The first member recruited was Araneas best friend Crab Guy a Xixo a species which communicates through smells and these smells trigger intense emotions. CrabGuy was always there thick and thin through it all for Aranea more importantly though he cared for bastions ongoing fight for freedom in Rayuba and was willing to defend it at all cost. Upon walking Rainbow Road they found Snail Dude slowly chugging along. He was quicker than you would think though, especially with a blade. 

    Next on the list was Mantis man, a middle aged monk about 7 ft. tall and part XiXo. Mantis Man had razor sharp claws which were very intimidating and his alien eyes had a way of looking deep into your soul. We met at the Sea Shrine located a few miles west of the dragon sharks house. 

"So we need to plan how this raid on the factory is going to go down! "There are only three of us and about one hundred of the small demons who worked at these forges which supplied the pyre with weapons so we are all probably going to die unless we do this right." said Aranea the electro dragon. "let's take a step back. I've got this strong shell" said snail gu. "but snail guy what do you mean?" said Aranea quizzically at Crabguy. "i'll put the bombs in my shell and you two just cover me!" "I don't know if we can let you do that said CrabGuy". WHat could we do though if snail guy was going to sacrifice himself who were we to judge as many families had been torn apart already in the short time this conflict had been happening. Still something deep within our souls ached as we helped strap the bombs to him the following morning. 

The Following day they met at the west end of the factory loading dock. "are you sure you want to do this it's not too late to back out?!" said Aranea to snail-dude "Yeah lets do this!" Their troop had gone largely UN-noticed until they broke through the window and a janitor saw them and rang the alarm. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4fjGwVpbm0

"Time to get in your shell and start the charge" said the electro dragon 

Ok DONE!

Just then, a group of Lizardmen broke through the front door of the factory with crossbow and spear ablaze "ragh & Gronk!" they said with a ferocious hissing tone! 

    "Eat plasma bolts bitch!" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7rOeSCw41A

They said this and started summersaulting across the floor  in a  flurry of heightened awareness after eating amanita mushrooms. "I'm gonna fuck you all in the ass!" they said as the lizard-men violently turned into bloody sacks of hamburger. "well, I'm all out of plasma bolts now it's time to bring out the plasma spear." They thought as CrabGuy covered them with his large claws which cut the lizard troopers dismembering the. The plasma spear which contained a large ruby from the nearby ocean shrine to Aesma godess of the ocean around these parts. It glowed a rainbow iridescent color like that of Pearl Abalone.  It was technically a trident since it has six tips which glowed even brighter and surrounded the Ruby held within the of the wooden staff which had an iron maiden carved upon it.

Then a laser shot out of the Ruby causing the last lizaard to completly vaporize into a ash pile with some melted armor around it. "Come on snail dude we can still make it out of this place. you don't have to do this!" "it's too late for me, go on without me." he said in a melancholy tone.  "Snail Dude noooooo!" cried Aranea who then reached out their arm for Snail Dude as CrabGuy held them back and carried them to safety. They could see the pyramidal-steel factory exploding in the distance.

After stocking up on plasma bolts and changing the batteries in the spear. Aranea and CrabGuy decided that they needed a bigger rew, mantis Man concurred as well. However it was hard to assemble a crew in these desperate and violent times. So their party continued to head East to the legendary Beast Jungle where they would meet Hanuman. He lived in a temple in a very deep part of Beast Jungle however inside his house were many other animals who had sentience and wanted to fight for their freedom against the Demonic Hordes that the nation of Pyre commanded.  "There are even Mummified Aliens of the lost Arken civilization in these ancient ruins, holding onto their ancient swords, pistols, maces, you name it" said Hanuman. After doing a little grave-robbing some type of detonation was triggered by one of the sarcophagi and sirens began blaring through cracks in the stone pyramid . They quickly ran out of the temple following the monkey, about two minutes before it exploded. Thankfully nobody was hurt, because almost all the animals that live in were hunting for food this morning out in Beast Jungle. "what a way nature has...we are just like a flame in the wind ready to be blown out" thought Aranea peacefully for a moment. "I'm really sorry about your house!" she said to Hanuman "it's ok, these things happen" said the monkey sitting there in utter disbelief.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4Hd-2OYgH0&list=PL67cMGyeB5sHbGW664C4Kol14cweVKyO8&index=6

[artdumpzonedontlookthanky]

SUPERGIANT ROUNDUP BASTION / TRANSISTOR / PYRE / HADES

compiling thoughts on games ive played. i may go back and edit these over time bc i like to ramble and maybe ill have a thought later about things to add. woo

🌟 BASTION (2011) | 10/10 4 million stars

THE game of all time. i think i bought and played this when the indie humble bundle (one of the first of its kind) slapped it together with limbo, psychonauts, amnesia and sword and sorcery (i have the art jen zee drew to advertise that on my wall still).

remarkable then and now for being a game i replayed like a madman and loved soooooo muuuuuuuuuch its ridiculous. the art direction will always be very impactful on me i think, jen zee i love ur stuff 4ever <3333333 the music is also still incredible, spike in a rail is iconic as ever, and logan cunningham's voice will always hit perfectly on the ears as rucks. this game was also the first major fandom i was in on this site and it could fit inside one tinychat lol, i have retained alot of the friendships i made from it back then, its an experience i can never untie from the actual game.

ive always liked isometric smash and whack games, most likely due to this games influence on me, but it was also just... one of the first big games i loved as a budding tween, so almost everything about i think with fondess, im recalling how the upgrade areas looked like rn and its making me smile. i made an askblog about a character from this game, we made a physical fanbook that got handed to devs at a con (i think the vid of them reacting to it is now lost to time) its deep bro its deep in my bones.

/ spoilers from here /

bastion's story i still also enjoy as dour as it is, and the choice at the end, between continuing the cycle of apocalyptic doom or build a new future with the remains, its still interesting to me. relive the past before it goes wrong and experience the fresh pain over and over or move on with grave of genocide ringing in your ears and the cunt of an old man on the same floating rock with you. augh!

🌟 TRANSISTOR (2014) | 6/10 stars it is a game and i think that's great

played this game front to back full the day it came out on my mothers computer and cried like a bitch at the end while liveblogging it. to this day i remember the combat being too much for my stupid little brain to comprehend and would get my ass beat constantly but the jen zee art and sword boyfriend and my loyalty to SG kept the brain alive.

MAYBE it would less of a pain in the ass for me to play now but the plotting out before you enforce the combo hurt my brain. i dont think ahead okay. ow. ow.

As with all SG games the art was incredible though they drew from really interesting influences for a sci fi take, and this ost with the addition of a bunch more vocal tracks (due to red being a singer) is sooo good. i have a version of the album of the glitched out versions of the songs ripped from the gameplay, delicious nyam nyam.

/ spoilers from here /

the story is like a traditional tragedy and the first showing of some great supergiant #buryyourgays but i still cry like a baby listening to paper boats so FML !!!!!!!!! i think that song affects me more than setting sail / coming home from bastion actually at this point (time to go find the orchestra pax vid and loop it)

🌟 PYRE (2017) | 9/10 starsies supergiant youve done it again

i liked pyre like 10 steps more than transistor its not even funny 😂 the world has a more fantasy leaning bent... the ensemble cast too.... and the gameplay i love this gameplay i will play ghost spirit basketball all fucking dayyyyyyyyyy also this is alot closer to a visnov than the rest of their games, between the sports parts, this is also probably why i really like it, who doesn't love it when their choices matter and little guys talk to them. visnovs are great.

/ spoilers from here /

i also just favour weirdo fantasy > over weirdo sci fi this is pure personal taste lmao. the environments were fun, the conceit of the game was interesting too. making the choice of who to liberate not only be a factor based on who you like and the story but ALSO the gameplay bc you no longer get to play them.... i remember i kept hedwyn around bc i liked him as a character and also bc he was the all rounder class but i did let him go before the end bc i wanted to give him that chance despite never seeing him again... that sort of experience with a character i love is rareeee, ive not had anything like it since. is it better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all..............wohah.............

i also just love the fake language they came up with for people talking, reading being a big deal here also.... so much about this games worldbuilding i loved it i loved it. i think my only issues would be the amount of forced het in the endings people can get lmao I DONT NEED EVERYONE TO GET HAPPILY STRAIGHT MARRIED SG LMFAO.

🌟 HADES (2020) | 10/10 starsies supergiant youve done it again

i have played this game for 250+ hours and 100 of those were during the entire time it was in early access the brain disease real alive and killing me to this day.

genius of SG i think to stretch their storytelling out to be way longer by putting into a rougelike its such a fun idea and it works so well bc of how finely tuned their gameplay always is. they incentivize the right things and the feel is addictive, you wanna get to the characters bc they're always the best part but the gameplay on the way is like butter, ENDLESS GRIND ENDLESS GRIND. GAME YOU PLAY UNTIL YOU DIE

/ spoilers from here /

i like that this story ended up being a dumb greek family drama, i dont have many more thoughts about that aspect though honestly bc i dont really care about greek gods as a setting and i always enjoy SG's original ideas and worlds alot more behehe. their remixes are no doubt fun though.

there's something to be said about the violent catharsis of being killed over and over to leave family i think, im sure i could write some metaphor here about having to confront hatred in loved ones over a choice about yourself actually just feels like dying over and over (im a poet) especially when you still live with them.

i think i actually for real cried the first time zag met his mother like the music and the va, it was all so tragic and sad, i dont think anything else really met that emotional high for me. i was almost surprised later on how happily the game resolves lol but i dont have any qualms with stories about fucked up families actually fixing their problems, hope for the future or something.. ! not all blood ties have to be burned to cinders, its a nice thing.

thanatos is my girlboss boyfriend also i cannnnnoooooootttttt believe they made him a tsundere sadboy who acts like you broke up with him MINUTE ONE OF MEETING THE MAN IN THE FUCKING GAME WHAT IS WRRRRONG WITYH YOUUUU SG YOU SICK FUCKS. i actually puked in my mouth everytime they talked and i was explicitly seeking it out. god of death and god of blood (life) can you go fuck yourselves ACTUALLY.

thank you for letting me bang him and meg at the same time sg also is making up for their lgbt transgressions if only a bit with this one may the next game be gayer. lovewins or something.

[cmdfell]

shout-out to myself for defending soldier 76 as a character choice TWO NIGHTS in a row!