#getting blue screen error in windows 10

[purbiworl]

SIGH

This is the 2nd night that I've tried this and I still don't know what's preventing me from upgrading, and I also got the most fucked screen on one of the boot ups.

It should look like this, btw:

[bucketgetter535]

No Margin for Error: Chapter Nine

WC: 5.9k

CW: None

Notes: Long time no seeeeee. Send thoughts to my anons plz it’s my fav part of the day… might even motivate me to get ch 10 out sooner

The hum of the plane engine had become background noise an hour ago, steady and hypnotic, like the rhythm of breath. Paige had her legs folded beneath her on the cream leather seat, hoodie sleeves pulled down over her knuckles, a half-empty bottle of water rolling gently near her ankle every time the jet shifted altitude. She didn’t bother to catch it. Just watched it drift like it had somewhere better to be.

The cabin was dim except for the soft blue glow of the windows and the yellow-white reading light Azzi had on across from her, illuminating the pages of whatever novel she was pretending to focus on. Her socked feet were propped up on the seat in front of her, posture lazy in the way only someone completely at home in this kind of space could manage.

Azzi’s jet was nice. Quiet. Private. Which made it all the more jarring when Paige’s phone buzzed in her lap with three back-to-back notifications. First from ESPN. Then The Race. Then a push alert from her own F1 app.

Her stomach dropped a little when she read the headline.

“BREAKING: Red Bull’s Top Driver to Retire at End of Season.”

She blinked, tapped into the article without thinking, skimming the lines about “tenure” and “graceful exit” and “opening the door for a new generation.” The typical send-off language. But that wasn’t what her brain stuck on.

It stuck on the last sentence of the third paragraph.

“…likely to spark immediate interest from top-tier drivers currently in contract negotiations.”

“Azzi,” Paige said, too casually.

Azzi didn’t look up from her book. “Hm?”

“You see the Red Bull thing?”

Azzi’s eyes flicked up now, sharp and curious. “What thing?”

Paige angled her phone screen toward her. “He’s retiring.”

That got Azzi’s attention. She leaned forward, taking the phone from Paige’s hand and squinting down at the headline like maybe she hadn’t read it right the first time. She exhaled low through her nose. “Damn.”

“Right?”

“Didn’t see that coming.”

“Neither did I.”

Paige took her phone back, but before she could lock it again, a new email appeared — top of the inbox, urgent flag marked red.

Subject: Meeting Inquiry: Red Bull Racing

Her mouth went dry.

She clicked into it.

Hi Paige,

Hope you’re well. We’d like to schedule a brief conversation this week, if possible, no pressure, of course, but we’re evaluating options and would love to hear your thoughts.

Best,

Helmut Marko.

Driver Development, Red Bull Racing

She stared at it a little longer than necessary. Not because she didn’t know what it meant, but because some part of her — the part that had started all of this at nineteen, when she didn’t know better — still couldn’t believe this was her life.

Azzi was watching her now. The quiet kind of watching. The “I know something just changed” kind.

Paige closed her phone slowly and didn’t look up. “I just got an email.”

“From who?”

“…Red Bull.”

Azzi sat still for a beat.

And then: “Do they want a meeting?”

Paige nodded.

There was a silence between them now, not awkward exactly, but heavy. The kind that made your ears ring just a little.

Azzi set her book down on the armrest. “Do you want to go to Red Bull?”

The question was simple. Too simple. It hit Paige harder than she expected.

She looked at her lap, hands twisting the hem of her hoodie, heart knocking a little too fast against her ribs. She wasn’t supposed to say it out loud. She hadn’t even decided anything yet. But some part of her deep down (the unguarded part, the one she only seemed to access around Azzi) wanted to let her in anyway.

“I don’t know,” Paige said.

She meant it.

Azzi waited.

“They’d probably offer more money,” Paige added after a second. “And they’re Red Bull. The car’s always fast. Always evolving. They’re ruthless about it.”

Azzi’s voice was quiet. “But?”

Paige hesitated. “I’m used to the Ferrari car. The handling. The engineers. Luka. You. I know how to win in this car.”

Azzi didn’t smile. She didn’t tease or joke or pretend it wasn’t a big deal. She just nodded once, like she’d already played out this entire conversation in her head and was waiting for Paige to catch up.

Paige exhaled. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“I’m glad you did.”

That surprised her.

Azzi leaned her head back against the seat, gaze shifting to the ceiling like she was talking more to herself now. “I’d rather know than guess.”

Paige didn’t answer. She didn’t trust her voice enough.

The plane continued east across the Atlantic, clouds scattered below them like pieces of some forgotten quilt. The air up here felt cleaner. Lighter. But no altitude in the world could stop Paige’s stomach from twisting into the shape of a question mark.

She stared out the window for a long time.

She was headed to New York first. Then Minnesota. Then probably Italy again, or Japan, or wherever the hell the next GP was. Her life, as always, was measured in terminals and tire compounds.

But somewhere between the breaking news and the unread email and Azzi’s eyes on her, Paige realized she was standing on the edge of something. Something big. Something she hadn’t planned for.

And maybe the part that scared her most was how badly she wanted to take Azzi with her, wherever she went.

–

The landing was smooth, quieter than Paige expected for a private jet touching down at JFK. She blinked against the sunlight as it streamed through the windows, golden and warm despite the haze of city smog. Azzi was already halfway through her phone the second the wheels hit the runway, thumb scrolling through emails like they’d never left Europe. Her focus, as always, moved faster than the plane.

The car waiting for them outside was black and sleek and forgettable in that New York way that screamed wealth through silence. Paige climbed in after Azzi and let her head fall back against the leather, eyes half-lidded as the skyline began to unfold in front of them. Azzi’s driver knew where to go without being told — straight to the penthouse.

Azzi’s place was exactly what Paige remembered and also somehow not at all. High ceilings. Cold marble. A wall of windows framing the city like a movie still. Everything smelled faintly like vanilla and something expensive Paige couldn’t name.

She dropped her bag by the couch and stretched her arms up toward the ceiling with a groan. “I’m starving.”

Azzi glanced up from where she was unlacing her shoes. “Me too. Let’s go eat.”

Paige blinked at her. “Right now?”

“Yes,” Azzi said. Then she paused, surveyed Paige’s wrinkled hoodie and sweatpants. “But, like, get real clothes on.”

Paige raised an eyebrow. “These are real clothes.”

Azzi smirked, already heading for her closet. “Not dinner-in-Manhattan clothes.”

Paige made a sound halfway between a sigh and a laugh but followed her toward the guest room anyway. Fifteen minutes later, they emerged from their rooms. Paige was in dark slacks and a crisp navy button-up. Her hair was tied back in a low bun, collar open just enough to pass as effortless.

Azzi grinned when she saw her. “Wow. You’re actually wearing something real tonight?”

Paige rolled her eyes. “You went full outfit. I’m just balancing it out.”

“Sure you are.”

The restaurant was a few blocks from the penthouse, upscale but quiet, one of those places you only knew if you knew. Inside, the lights were low and warm, the air perfumed citrus something. A waiter led them to a booth in the corner, just private enough to feel separate from the rest of the world.

The menus were handed out and barely touched. Azzi knew what she wanted before she sat down.

As the drinks arrived, sparkling water for Paige and some fruity mocktail for Azzi, the conversation shifted. It wasn’t about racing. Or sponsors. Or media days. It was light and slow, looping through stories they hadn’t had time to tell all season. Paige noticed it in the small things — the way Azzi tilted toward her slightly when she spoke, the way their knees brushed under the table, the way neither of them checked their phones unless they were mid-laugh or reaching for their drinks.

Halfway through the main course, Paige caught a flash of something near the window, the glint of a camera lens in the hands of a man sitting alone at a neighboring table.

She didn’t make a show of it. Just leaned in slightly and murmured, “Don’t look now, but camera guy, two tables down.”

Azzi didn’t flinch. Just reached for her fork and smiled like Paige had said something funny. “Got it.”

For a few minutes, they talked around it. Then the food arrived: steak for Paige, some complicated pasta dish for Azzi that smelled like heaven.

“This is so good,” Azzi said around a mouthful. “I’m never eating airport food again.”

“Liar,” Paige said.

“Okay, fine. But I’m dreaming of this next time we’re stuck in Belgium.”

They were laughing again by the time the waiter came back. “Any dessert for the table?” he asked, poised with his little notepad.

Azzi lit up instantly. “Yes. Absolutely.”

Paige gave her a look. “You’re still hungry?”

“I have a sweet tooth,” Azzi said, unapologetic.

“I’m good,” Paige said to the waiter, who nodded and turned to Azzi expectantly.

Azzi tilted her head, mock-betrayed. “Wow. So you’re calling me fat.”

“What?” Paige blinked. “No—”

“I just said I want dessert and you said I’m good, which is code for I don’t need dessert, which is code for some people do, which is code for—”

“Oh my god, Azzi.” Paige ran a hand down her face, laughing now. “You’re impossible.”

Azzi grinned, victorious. “I’ll have the chocolate thing. And she’ll have one too.”

The waiter nodded, utterly unfazed, and disappeared.

Paige gave her a look. “I said I didn’t want dessert.”

“You said it. But you didn’t mean it.”

Paige shook her head, but when the plate arrived, she picked up her spoon without another word. The chocolate was warm and rich and exactly what she hadn’t realized she wanted.

Azzi leaned her chin on her hand and watched her take the first bite.

“Told you.”

And Paige, in spite of everything, couldn’t stop smiling.

–

Back at Azzi’s apartment, the lights were low, and the sounds of the city were muffled through thick glass. Paige dropped her jacket by the couch again and toed off her shoes with a quiet sigh, already feeling the warm hush of late-night softness settle over the penthouse. Azzi disappeared into the kitchen, the refrigerator door opening and closing with the easy rhythm of someone at home. Paige didn’t follow right away. She just stood there for a second, absorbing it. The quiet. The casualness. The fact that she could walk in like this and not ask permission.

Azzi came back with two waters and handed one over wordlessly. Paige took it with a small smile, brushing her fingers against Azzi’s for a moment longer than necessary.

“Hey,” Azzi said, leaning against the counter. “When’s your flight to Minnesota?”

Paige twisted the cap off the bottle. “Whenever I want.”

Azzi raised an eyebrow. “Right. Millionaire life.”

Paige shrugged, sipping her water. “Perks.”

Azzi held her gaze for a beat. “So… is that you saying you don’t have to leave tonight?”

Paige blinked, then smiled faintly. “Is that you asking me to stay the night?”

“Yes,” Azzi said, without missing a beat.

Paige’s smile curved wider. “Then okay.”

Azzi’s shoulders loosened, just a little. She nodded toward the hallway. “Fair warning though. My parents are coming over tomorrow.”

Paige stilled. Just a second. Barely noticeable. But something tightened behind her ribs.

“Oh. Nice,” she said, setting the bottle down.

Azzi didn’t catch it — or if she did, she let it slide. She was already halfway to the couch, flopping down with a sigh, her long legs stretched out and crossed at the ankle. “They want to see me before we head out to Azerbaijan. I figured we’d do brunch or something.”

“Cool,” Paige said, easing down beside her. “Sounds chill.”

It did not sound chill.

Azzi’s parents. Tomorrow morning. Paige let her head tip back on the cushion and stared at the ceiling. She shouldn’t care. They weren’t dating. They hadn’t talked about it like that. There was no label, no pressure, no anything. But still.

She felt it again — that quiet, rising panic in her chest. Not the kind she felt before a race. Not adrenaline. This was different. Deeper. Harder to explain.

The idea of meeting Azzi’s parents didn’t scare her because she thought they’d dislike her.

It scared her because somewhere in the back of her mind, Paige was starting to realize she wanted them to like her.

And that was… not a casual thought.

They’d been orbiting this not-quite-friends, not-quite-something-else thing for months now. Neither of them naming it. Both of them pretending that the in-between space was enough. And maybe it was — for Azzi. She was so effortlessly open, so fine with just being seen, being known. She didn’t flinch when her friends asked if she and Paige were something. She didn’t hesitate when she put her hand on Paige’s back in public, or wore her hoodie that no one knows is her hoodie because it’s just a Ferrari team sweatshirt.

And Paige wasn’t like that.

Not with anyone but her dad and Drew. They knew. But no one else. Not really. Not the media, not her extended family, not even most of her friends back in Minnesota. She hadn’t meant for it to be a secret. It just hadn’t come up, and then it kept not coming up, and then it got harder to bring up at all.

But now she was here, about to stay the night again, and tomorrow she’d sit across from Azzi’s parents and pretend this was nothing. Or maybe not pretend. Maybe just exist in the weird space between pretending and hoping.

Azzi turned to look at her, her eyes soft in the lamplight.

“You okay?”

Paige nodded, a little too quickly. “Yeah. Just tired.”

Azzi leaned her head gently against Paige’s shoulder. Paige didn’t move.

She just sat there, suddenly feeling the weight of something unspoken pressing into her ribs. Wanting to say something, anything, and knowing she wouldn’t. Not tonight.

So instead, she leaned her cheek against Azzi’s hair and closed her eyes.

And let herself stay.

–

Brunch was at a small corner spot that smelled like lavender and espresso and fresh bread. It was the kind of place Azzi didn’t even need to look up directions to, she just knew it by heart, like half of New York. Paige followed her through the glass doors, head slightly ducked, even though it didn’t matter anymore. They’d already been seen. Photographed. Edited into slow-motion montages over TikTok sounds. She could hide her face, but a lot of damage had been done a long time ago.

Inside, the place buzzed with quiet conversation and the sound of cutlery tapping plates. Paige spotted Azzi’s parents right away. Katie and Tim Fudd were at a corner table, both standing halfway as Azzi approached, arms open, smiles already on.

Paige braced herself.

She’d never said it out loud — not to Azzi, not even to her dad who she texted this morning — but some part of her had expected this to go poorly. Not dramatic, just… off. The stiff politeness of people trying not to say what they really thought. The overcorrection of guarded approval. The silent evaluation of her outfit or her championship standings or her carefully ambiguous Instagram captions.

Instead, Tim gave her a warm nod and said, “Nice to see you again, Paige,” like they’d had brunch last week instead of never. And Katie pulled her into a brief, not-overbearing hug before they all sat down.

And then it was just… easy.

Not fake-easy, not tension-smoothed easy. Just real.

They ordered quickly. Pancakes for Azzi, a veggie omelet for Katie, black coffee for Tim, and whatever sounded least like food for Paige, which turned out to be eggs and toast. Then the conversation started, and to Paige’s surprise, it didn’t revolve around racing. Not at first.

Katie asked about Minnesota, about Paige’s dad, about what it was like to grow up with “so much snow and so little coffee.” Tim wanted to know what books she’d been reading lately, and Paige fumbled, caught off-guard, before muttering something about having started some novel and then abandoning it halfway through a flight to Monaco. That got a laugh out of Tim. Not a mocking one, just understanding. Then somehow they were all talking about bad travel reads and books people lied about finishing.

It was bizarre. In a good way.

Then the talk drifted back to F1. Not in the press conference kind of way, but more curious. Tim asked if Ferrari felt different this year. Katie asked Azzi if the pink helmet had been a branding move or just because she liked it. Paige waited for the tension to return, for the questions to circle back to contracts or media coverage or what it was like to be twenty-two and under a microscope.

But it didn’t. They just… talked.

And Paige found herself liking them.

Katie had Azzi’s calm, watchful energy. The kind that made you feel seen even if she hadn’t said a word. And Tim was like a low-stakes ESPN commentator, the kind of person who probably had opinions on your golf swing but would keep them to himself unless you asked. They loved Azzi. That was obvious. But it wasn’t overbearing. It was a quiet kind of pride, the kind that didn’t need to be stated.

And Paige… Paige didn’t feel tested.

She felt included.

At one point, while Azzi was busy explaining tire degradation to a very amused Tim, Katie leaned slightly toward Paige and said, “You’re different in person. More relaxed.”

Paige blinked. “Uh. Good different?”

Katie smiled, sipping her tea. “Very.”

There was no follow-up. No pointed glances or motherly warnings. Just that.

Later, Paige excused herself to the bathroom, more out of needing a breath than anything else. She leaned on the marble sink, staring at herself in the mirror. Her cheeks were flushed and she looked tired, maybe. Or just unguarded.

Azzi had made it look easy. Paige wasn’t sure if that was a skill or just who she was. But somehow this had gone… well. Better than well.

When she came back out, Azzi had stolen a bite of everyone’s food and was grinning unapologetically while Katie fake-scolded her. Paige slid back into her seat and caught Azzi’s eye.

And Azzi — completely relaxed, pancake syrup on the side of her mouth — leaned in close enough that only Paige could hear.

“They like you,” she said softly, like it was just a neutral truth.

Paige picked up her toast and replied without thinking, “I think I like them too.”

And when she looked up again, Azzi was already smiling.

–

Paige hadn’t intended to go to Montana.

Not really. Not officially. The flight was booked late at night on a whim, sometime after Azzi had fallen asleep beside her in the apartment and Paige had watched the skyline for hours, wide awake and heavy with something she couldn’t name. The car met her at JFK just before sunrise, no public post, no press to catch it. She arrived under low clouds and quieter thoughts, and she didn’t text her mom until the wheels hit the tarmac.

Paige: u home?

Amy called two minutes later. Paige answered before the first ring ended.

She hadn’t seen her mom since the off-season. Since before testing. Before Ferrari. Before Azzi. Before everything got loud again like last time. Like F3. The driveway looked the same. It was cracked in the same corner it always had been, gravel spitting up under the tires of the rental SUV. The mountains hovered in the distance like they’d been waiting.

Amy opened the front door the moment Paige’s feet hit the porch. And Paige, despite being twenty-two years old and leading the F1 world championship, dropped her bags and just let herself be hugged.

It didn’t fix anything. But it helped.

They made tea and sat at the kitchen island like nothing had changed. Like Paige hadn’t just flown across the country on a Tuesday with nothing but a carry-on and a handful of feelings she didn’t understand.

“So,” Amy said eventually, one eyebrow raised, “you wanna tell me what’s going on, or should I guess?”

Paige gave her a lopsided smile. “You’d guess right.”

Amy took a sip from her mug. “Try me anyway.”

And Paige did.

It came out slower than she meant, with a lot of pauses and not a lot of eye contact. But Amy didn’t rush her, didn’t fill the silences. Paige talked about Ferrari. About Monza. About what it felt like to lose by less than a second to someone you might actually be in love with and not even know it. She talked about the Red Bull thing—how they wanted a meeting, how her name was suddenly in headlines again like she didn’t still have a season to finish.

And then she talked about Azzi.

Not like gossip. Not even like a crush. Just… truthfully.

“She’s the best driver I’ve ever raced,” Paige said quietly. “And also the best person I’ve ever been around. And that’s… complicated.”

Amy didn’t speak, just pressed her hand lightly against Paige’s back. Paige kept going.

“She’s so comfortable. With herself. With people. She doesn’t even think about it, and I… I’m still hiding everything from half the world. I’m hiding what I have with her, I guess.” A pause. “And that’s not her fault.”

Amy just nodded.

Then Paige mentioned the concussion. The one from July. The one she brushed off because the team cleared her after a week and she didn’t want to miss Silverstone. She told Amy about the headaches that still came sometimes, about the way light sometimes made her flinch in the garage, about how her balance felt slightly off on stairs when she was tired.

Amy’s silence was different then. Sharper.

“Paige Madison.”

“Yeah,” Paige muttered, sheepish.

“That was two months ago.”

“I know.”

“You don’t wait two months to say something like that.”

“I didn’t wait,” Paige argued half-heartedly. “I just… didn’t bring it up.”

Amy gave her a look, one Paige remembered from middle school when she forgot to ice her knees. Then she stood behind her and placed both hands gently on Paige’s neck.

Paige didn’t protest.

Amy’s thumbs worked over the knots at the base of her skull, exactly like she used to when Paige was twelve and spent too long karting after dark. There was something about it. About being home, about being touched with that kind of care that made something in her eyes sting. But she blinked it away.

“I didn’t want to sit alone at my house.” she said softly.

Amy didn’t stop massaging. “I know. That’s why you came here.”

“Yeah.”

“You staying long?”

Paige shrugged. “Just a couple days. Then I’m back to New York. Or Maranello. Or wherever.”

Amy pressed into her shoulder blade, then eased up. “You ever think about slowing down?”

“All the time.”

“And?”

“I don’t know how.”

Amy kissed the top of her head. “You don’t have to know. But maybe try.”

Paige let herself close her eyes. Just for a minute.

It didn’t solve anything. Not the Azzi situation. Not the Red Bull meeting. Not the press or the performance pressure or the concussion symptoms she should’ve told her team about weeks ago. But sitting there, with her mother’s hands on her shoulders and the smell of home in her hair, it felt like something was okay. Even if just for now.

–

Baku.

There was something about the city circuit in Azerbaijan that Paige liked more than she meant to. It wasn’t just the long straights or the tricky, blind corners. It was the way the city felt alive around her when she was strapped in. Like she was flying through a place still moving, still breathing, the world flashing by in colored lights and old stone.

The castle walls came up faster than she remembered. That tight left-right-left flick through the medieval section always made her nervous her first year in Formula One. Now, it just made her grin.

“Okay, that’s green in Sector Two,” Luka’s voice crackled in her ear, all calm efficiency. “Car’s responding well.”

“Feels good,” she replied, flicking her wrist lightly on exit. “Bit of understeer if I push into that uphill right, but otherwise nice.”

Another pause on the line. “Copy. Tyre temps?”

“Stable. Tell Fred I’m better at managing now.”

“You say that every weekend,” Luka deadpanned.

Paige smirked. “Yeah, but this time it’s true.”

Luka’s laugh was a little more real this time, brief in her ears. “We’ll see in twenty laps.”

Practice was going smooth. No heavy traffic, no weird bumps, and the Ferrari was humming through the corners like it wanted to run. They’d done a good job on the setup this week, she could tell already. Braking felt crisp. Rear traction was right there. No wobble.

Azzi was already on track ahead of her, a few laps into her first run of the evening. Paige glanced down the straight and caught a flash of her teammate’s car disappearing around the turn. Same red livery as hers, low under the lights, moving like it was skating on rails.

She didn’t mean to say anything. It just kind of came out.

“Where’s Azzi on the delta?”

And it was the way she said it.

The tone. The way her voice dipped around the name , softer, quieter, like she was asking about someone she knew from before all this. Luka didn’t answer right away, and Paige knew she’d just told on herself in the dumbest possible way.

“Oh,” Luka finally said, casual and unbothered in that dangerous way. “Now you care where Azzi’s running?”

Paige huffed, fake annoyed but not exactly denying anything. “I always care.”

“Mmhmm. She’s P4 right now. Two-tenths behind you.”

“Okay.” She clicked a paddle shift with unnecessary force. “Copy.”

“McLaren’s ahead of both of you. Gotta keep it tight.”

“Yeah, I saw. They’re on a tear.”

She adjusted her line on the next corner, just to shave off a tenth, maybe two. It worked. The Ferrari responded like it had something to prove, the kind of balance she hadn’t felt since Monza. Still, the McLarens looked quick — maybe too quick for comfort. Paige didn’t mind, not really. It made things interesting.

And besides, she was leading the world championship.

And Ferrari was running away with the constructors’.

She didn’t need to dominate every weekend. She just needed to finish higher than Azzi.

And that was becoming harder.

“She’s closing in,” Luka said a few laps later, a mild warning in his tone.

Paige didn’t answer. Just opened the throttle on exit and pushed.

–

Dr. Liao’s office was always cold, no matter what country they were racing in. Paige knew better than to complain when the doctor liked it that way. “Keeps the brain alert,” she always said, which didn’t make a ton of sense to Paige, but she wasn’t the one with two medical degrees and a license to ground drivers.

So she just sat still on the edge of the padded exam table, hoodie sleeves pushed to her elbows, waiting for the light to turn green on the retinal scan.

“Still a little photophobic?” Dr. Liao asked gently, tapping something into her tablet without looking up.

“Less than I was,” Paige said. “More when I’m tired. Or if I forget my tinted visor.”

“You haven’t forgotten it, though.”

“No,” Paige smirked. “Scared of you.”

Dr. Liao smiled. “Good. I like that you’re scared of me.”

They moved through the rest of the checkup, reflexes, balance, peripheral tests. It was routine by now. Paige knew the drill and the doctor knew her, enough to know when something small was off. This time, there wasn’t. Paige passed clean.

“You rested well during the break?” Dr. Liao asked, her tone lighter now.

Paige shrugged, stretching her neck as the doctor wrote a final note. “Montana for a bit. With my mom.”

Dr. Liao raised a brow, but not unkindly. “That’s new.”

“Yeah, I know,” Paige said. “Just… wanted to see her.”

“How was it?”

“Nice. Cold. My mom gave me a lecture.”

“As she should,” Dr. Liao replied, smiling. “You’re good to go. Try not to hit anything hard.”

“Only curbs.”

“That’s a lie.”

Paige laughed.

–

The meeting room smelled faintly of engine grease and lemon cleaner. Azzi’s engineer, Mateo, always brought a bottle of something citrus-scented and sprayed the corners like a dad preparing for houseguests. Luka was already seated, coffee in hand, and Azzi had her legs kicked up on the chair next to hers, scrolling through data on her iPad.

Fred was running point on the strategy discussion. Calm, clipped French-English, all business. The McLarens had shown top-line speed in practice — more than expected — but both cars had struggled with degradation. Tire wear was going to matter, and the engineers knew it.

“It’s a long-game race,” Mateo said. “We don’t win this in the first fifteen laps.”

Luka nodded. “We can take them. They’ll push early, try to break you. Let them. Make them overheat.”

Paige watched Azzi glance at her then, just once, like they were both already thinking the same thing. They’d done this dance before. Managed races better than anyone else on the grid. The Ferrari wasn’t just fast now. It was smart. Smooth. Balanced.

Paige felt it in her ribs already. They could win this.

The meeting wrapped and most of the engineers filtered out. Some off to brief the mechanics, others to check real-time sims. Azzi lingered, eyes still scanning her tablet. Paige had her AirPods in, low but clear. A beat-heavy R&B track hummed gently in her ears.

Azzi looked up. “What do you listen to before meetings?”

Paige blinked, pulling out one bud. “Music.”

Azzi deadpanned. “No kidding.”

Paige smirked. “Mostly R&B. Sometimes gospel.”

Azzi gave her a look — a curious one, not mocking. “Gospel?”

“Yeah,” Paige shrugged. “When I’m stressed. Or if the flights are bad. Just… helps.”

Azzi nodded slowly, like she was adding it to some invisible file in her head.

“You in the gym a lot?” she asked after a beat.

Paige tilted her head, amused by the sudden pivot. “Between seasons, yeah. Like…five, six days a week. During the season? Less. I try to get a lift in when we’re not traveling but…”

“But you’re always traveling.”

“Exactly.”

Azzi nodded. “You can tell, though.”

Paige blinked. “Tell what?”

“That you lift,” Azzi said plainly. “Your arms.”

Paige looked at her, unsure if that was meant to be neutral or not, and Azzi didn’t elaborate. Just turned her attention back to her screen like she hadn’t just said something that made Paige hyper-aware of how close they were standing.

It hung there a second, unsaid, before Azzi stood and brushed her hoodie sleeves down.

“I’ll see you at briefing.”

“Yeah,” Paige said, still holding the AirPod in her hand. “See you.”

–

This might be the worst (or best) decision of Paige’s life.

It was late, but not late enough for the world to sleep. The streets below were still awake with the hum of Baku’s nightlife, headlights catching on wet cobblestones and music spilling from narrow windows. The hotel hallway was quieter, carpeted and still, muffled enough that Paige could hear the small knock of her own heartbeat in her ears as she lifted her hand and knocked gently on the door.

She didn’t wait long.

The door swung open and there was Azzi, barefoot in black sweatshorts and a threadbare Georgetown hoodie, curls pulled back and eyes soft like she’d been half expecting this.

“Hey, P,” she said, voice low.

Paige stepped inside without a word, just nodded, lips pressed tight together in a way she knew would betray her nerves. Azzi let the door fall shut behind them and leaned her back against it, folding her arms loosely across her chest.

For a long moment, neither of them moved. The hotel room smelled faintly of vanilla lotion and whatever tea Azzi had brewed earlier. The scent was warm, lived-in, hers.

Paige didn’t sit down. She stood there like she had to say it on her feet.

“I don’t know what we are,” she said finally, quietly. “I think I want to. Know, I mean.”

Azzi tilted her head slightly, but she didn’t interrupt.

Paige swallowed. “I didn’t come here for anything casual. Not tonight. Not anymore.”

Azzi’s mouth twitched, not into a smile, but something close. “You don’t have to say it P. I know.”

“Well… I did,” Paige said. “Because I’ve been… holding back. From you. And I think you’ve known it. And I think you let me.”

Azzi nodded slowly. “I didn’t want you to have to tell anyone anything you weren’t ready to say out loud. Especially not about being gay.”

Paige looked down, thumb brushing the inside of her palm. “I told my mom… About us, I mean.”

Azzi’s eyebrows lifted, just slightly. “Yeah?”

“She might’ve… nudged me.”

Now Azzi did laugh, soft and warm and familiar. “I figured.”

There was a pause, the kind that only made sense when two people had lived in the same small tension for months. Azzi pushed off the door finally, walked closer — not fast, not slow — and stopped in front of Paige, close enough that Paige could smell her shampoo. Close enough that her fingers itched to touch her.

“You came to me,” Azzi said, searching her face. “I waited for that. I’m proud of you for that..”

“I know.”

“I want to be with you,” Azzi said simply. “Not for anyone else. Not for the media. Just for me and you.”

“I want that too,” Paige said, and her voice cracked just slightly on the last word. “Even if I’m still… you know..”

“I know that too.”

They stood there, barely apart, the city still humming outside but far, far away from this room.

“It’s better to be private anyway,” Azzi said. “Cleaner. Easier. And we don’t have to care what anyone else thinks. I just want… you.”

Paige let her breath go — shaky, but full. She took one step forward and Azzi didn’t move, just let her. Their foreheads touched, then Azzi’s hand slid to Paige’s wrist.

Then her gaze dipped.

“Alright,” Azzi said with a little smirk. “Now I wanna see those biceps without the sweatshirt in the way.”

Paige let out a laugh, shaky but real.

“You’ve been thinking about my arms?”

Azzi didn’t blink. “They haunt me.”

Paige grinned, finally, and reached down to peel off the hoodie. Her t-shirt underneath clung to her skin. Warm from nerves and night and maybe from how hard her heart was still pounding.

Azzi’s eyes lingered.

Paige flushed. “You’re ridiculous.”

“I’m sincere,” Azzi said. “And sincere people deserve front row seats.”

“Is that so?”

Azzi’s fingers curled into the hem of Paige’s shirt. “You’re the one who came over at midnight babe.”

Paige exhaled. “Yeah. I did.”

And she didn’t regret it.

Not even for a second.

[nessypanda-art]

soo, I'm a little worried that my laptop may be on its last legs. I keep getting a blue screen error more often than I usually do (yes the amount of times you should be seeing that error is 0 but I've gotten used to seeing it a few times. My boy is old and he has windows 11 downloaded onto it because of my tech-savvy cousin). This laptop is practically my arm and leg for digital art and Iwould hate to lose most of my artwork again.

I'm considering either opening up some simple commissions OR creating a patreon adjacent page so that, when my laptop does break, I'm not struggling for funds.

I was personally thinking like, $10/$15 ish for some simple b&w character drawings? Something like below:

OR maybe stuff like below? Though I'd probably put it more around the $20 mark.

If I went the patreon route, I'd probably offer drawing requests, since I don't plan on having more than one tier.

I don't know, like I said, nothing is set in stone. Would there be an interest?

[breawycker]

[Photo ID: the first photo is a screenshot of a blue screen of death from Windows 10. The error code is "critical process died" and there's a QR code you can scan to get more information on the problem. In the second image someone has scanned the QR Code in Pokémon Sun and Moon to get a female Mareep, an electric sheep pokémon. Quoth Bulbapedia, "Mareep is an ovine Pokémon with fluffy cream-colored wool covering its entire body, as well as a curly tuft of wool in the middle of its head. Its head is blue, and it has black eyes. Its four feet are blue and have two digits on each foot, and it appears to be on tiptoe at all times. Its conical ears and tail have a yellow-and-black striped pattern. Mareep has an orange sphere at the end of its tail, which acts like a small light bulb." End ID. The joke is a reference to the novel that Blade Runner is based on: Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?]

[mysimsallgames]

The Sims Legacy has received an update. Patch 4, which was released 20.02.25, addresses the following in The Sims game:

Fixed Issues:

- General stability improvements

- Addressed video player issues

- Performance improvement with AMD GPUs

- On some systems, walls, floors and other items might not appear on screen

- The game could crash when zooming in/out of Calamity Forest

- Child Sims would sometimes show a “Missing Animation” error when interacting with mail

- On some computers set to 2k resolution, visual artifacts or tearing could be present on various game screens

- The blue panel on the bottom of the screen did not properly fill the horizontal space

- Tiles near pool edges sometimes displayed as empty and grey

- The Burglar appearing could crash the game

The Sims General Notes:

The game by default adopts the aspect ratio of the monitor it is run on. The aspect ratio can now be specified with the launch option “-maxaspect:<width>:<height>” (note that underbars ‘_’ can be used instead of colons). Examples: -maxaspect:16:9, -maxaspect_4_3 or bespoke ones like -maxaspect:16:10

- Note that the option will only set the aspect of height to width. It will only restrict the maximum width - it can not increase it

- In windowed mode, the window will run at the aspect ratio; at fullscreen black bars will fill the unused space of the monitor

- This will mostly be useful in situations where your monitor (virtual or real) is very wide, but you want the game to be a more traditional aspect ratio

- Note that there are limitations on how extreme a ratio this will accept

There are some hardware configurations that we are seeing a disproportionate number of errors on and are actively investigating.

Some players who have experienced problems with getting an error indicating a lack of Vulkan compatible devices have reported that in some cases removing "OpenCL™, OpenGL®, and Vulkan® Compatibility Pack" can resolve the issue

We have received reports of “random flies” appearing. This is working as designed

Patch update source: https://www.ea.com/games/the-sims/news/sims-legacy-and-the-sims-2-legacy-patch-notes-20-02

[atplblog]

Price: [price_with_discount] (as of [price_update_date] - Details) [ad_1] 10 Pieces car windshield glass concentrated washer tablets solid car effervescent tablets glass solid wiper cleaning tablets for car kitchen window Feature: Nice performance: Our solid concentrated clean washer tablets can nicely remove dirt and dust from the glass, they can clean the stagnant dirt even it's invisible, good protective cleaning tools for you to choose. How to use it: Open the water storage tank of windshield wiper. Put in a piece of windshield glass concentrated washer tablet. Pour water into the water tank. Clean the windshield glass with a wiper. Specification: Size: approx. 0.6 inch/ 1.5 cm in diameter Color: blue Temperature requirements: over than minus 5 degree Celsius Package content: 100 x Solid car effervescent tablets Note: Small and inedible products, please keep away from children and pets. Not suitable for eye contact or long-term skin contact. Manual measurement, please allow slight errors on size. The colors may exist slight difference due to different screens. Abundant for you: you will obtain 10 pieces of solid concentrated clean washer tablets in total, the abundant quantity can satisfy your long-term demands, you can also share with your families or friends Necessary and practical: just 1 piece car effervescent tablet and 4 liters of water, you will get 4 liters of car windshield glass concentrated washer for you to clean and lubricate windshield, which can reduce the friction of wiper and glass, keep your car windshield in neat and good working condition How to apply: you need to put 1 piece glass solid wiper cleaning tablet into the wiper can and pour proper amount of water, or you could dissolve the tablet with a small container, then pour the dissolved cleaning fluid into the wiper can and fill it with water, which could dissolve more quickly and thoroughly Mini dimension: each glass concentrated washer tablet measures approx. 0.6 inch/ 1.5 cm in diameter, its mini dimensions make it lightweight and portable, easy to carry and store, won't occupy extra spaces Functional usages: our practical glass solid wiper cleaning tablets can help to clean automotive glass, kitchen, window, tile, mirror and so on, they are also suitable for remove the kitchen and floor stains, bring you a comfortable living surrounding [ad_2]

[cricutloginapp]

Cricut Explore Air 2 Program Download on Computer and Phone

Are you looking for a guide on Cricut Explore Air 2 program download? If so, you are in the right place! Recently, I had my PC repaired. Suddenly, it came up with an error, so I had to switch to my Android phone to use my Cricut program. Thanks to Cricut, their Cricut software is compatible with various platforms, one of which is the Android device. Yes, you heard it right! I have been using my Cricut software on Android for a few weeks. You can also use it hassle-free. All you need to do is download the software and get used to it.

In this blog, I will explain an important topic: Cricut Design Space download for Windows 10 and Android phones. Are you excited to learn? If yes, let’s get started! But before that, let me show you the system requirements needed to run the software smoothly on devices. Let’s dive in!

System Requirements for Using Cricut Explore Air 2 Program

When I first went to download the Cricut app on my PC, I first checked all the requirements that my computer should have. If you don’t know, Cricut has set some criteria for the computer, meaning you can’t use the oldest version of the system to run the Design Space app.

However, to use this software, you will need a specific operating system version. Besides, there is also a requirement for hardware. Let’s have a look at them before moving to the Cricut Explore Air 2 program download.

For Windows

Operating System: Windows 10 or later (64-bit)

Disk: 2 GB free

Connectivity: A USB port or Bluetooth

RAM: Minimum 4 GB

CPU: Intel Dual Core or equivalent to AMD processor

Display: Minimum 1024px x 768px screen resolution

For Android

Operating System: Android 6.0 or higher

Supported Device: Mobile and tablets only (Chromebooks not supported)

Compatible Devices

Google: Pixel series

LG: G, K, or V series

Samsung: Galaxy S, Galaxy Note, Galaxy Tab A, Galaxy Tab S series

Motorola: Droid G, Z, E, Turbo or Moto series

Note: Performance varies depending on your chipset, processor speed, and manufacturer.

Cricut Explore Air 2 Program Download on Windows

Let me take you to the detailed steps below to download the Cricut software on your PC. But wait! Have you checked the PC requirements above? If not, please check the requirements before downloading the software. If you have checked it already, you need to go through the steps below:

Open an internet browser and go to Cricut’s official site, design.cricut.com.

Then, select a checkbox to accept Cricut’s Terms & Policy.

After that, a download button will appear and be activated. As a result, you can now hit it to download the Cricut app on your Windows 10.

When downloading is done, you should check the file where you downloaded it. It is likely to be available in your Downloads folder.

Double-tap on the file that you have downloaded before and begin your app installation.

At this time, your computer may ask for your permission, such as whether you want this app to make changes to your device. Click Yes and move ahead.

When the installation is done, you should register for a Cricut account.

Here, you need to use a Cricut ID and password.

Finally, you might have understood the Cricut Design Space download for Windows 10.

Cricut Explore Air 2 Program Download on Android

For Android users, following the steps below will be the easiest way to download the Cricut app. But make sure you have also checked the compatible devices to use the Cricut software on them. Let’s dive in:

Navigate to your phone’s home screen and launch the Google Play Store.

Go to the search bar and type “Cricut Design Space.”

Now, select the Design Space software, which is visible in the results below.

Then, hit the blue Install button to download the app.

After that, your app will appear on your home screen.

Launch the app and create a Cricut account. If you have one, just sign in to use Cricut.

By now, you might have understood the Cricut Explore Air 2 program download, like how to download it on a Windows 10 computer and Android phone. The steps explained above are simple and beginner-friendly.

Final Words

In this blog, I explained how to download Cricut Design Space on Windows and Android devices. Beginners or pro crafters who want to download or re-download the software on their computers can follow this simple guide. The blog has two main topics: system requirements and how to download the software on a compatible device. As a professional crafter, I have set up the Cricut machine many times. So, these are the simplest steps that I can explain to you.

FAQs

Question 1: How to create a new Cricut account?

Answer: If you just want to get started with your Cricut machine, you will need an account. The Cricut account is a must-have for every Cricut user. Let’s see the steps below to create one for you:

Open your internet browser and move to cricut.com/setup.

Now, hit the Create Cricut ID.

Next, enter the email address.

Then, enter your password.

Afterward, fill in your full name.

Once done, choose your country and region.

Thereon, follow the simple instructions on your display and finish the sign-in process.

Question 2: Can I use my Cricut Explore Air 2 program on an iOS device?

Answer: Yes, you can! Whether you call it the Cricut Explore Air 2 program or Cricut Design Space, the software can be used on iOS devices. To use it, launch the App Store and download the Cricut app. After that, install the software on your device and explore its incredible features.

Question 3: How to install Cricut Explore Air 2 program on a Mac?

Answer: To install the Cricut app on your MacBook, follow the steps below:

Visit design.cricut.com and download the app.

Then, go to your Downloads folder to find the .dmg file.

Now, double-click on the .dmg file.

On the next screen, drag the Cricut icon to the Applications folder.

Then, the installation will start.

Your Cricut app will be added to your desktop in your Applications folder.

design.cricut.com/setup

cricut log in

help cricut com

how to use cricut design space

Source :- https://cricutexploreesetup.wordpress.com/2024/04/12/cricut-explore-air-2-program-download-on-computer-and-phone/

[cricutmakeronline]

How to Connect Cricut to Mac: Ultimate Guide for Beginners

Congratulations on buying a new Cricut machine. You may be wondering how to connect Cricut to Mac. To design your favorite project, all you need to do is unbox your machine, set it up, and connect it to a computer. Access to Cricut models lets you create unique designs and beautiful projects with different materials. Before cutting the material, it is mandatory to download Cricut Design Space on your Mac.

After connecting both devices, it will be very easy to create designs and transfer them to the Cricut cutting machine. You can connect your Mac computer to the Cricut machine using Bluetooth or a USB cable. Both procedures are different and have to be done very carefully. In this post, you will learn how to finish the connection process successfully.

How to Download Cricut Design Space on Mac?

If you want to create your favorite design on your Mac, you must have the Cricut app on your Mac. It is the compulsory step you must complete while learning how to connect Cricut to Mac. Without the Design Space, you won’t be able to make your inner idea come to the real world. Go through the steps given below and get to know the entire process of getting the app on your Mac computer:

Kick off the Cricut Design Space download process by opening the Safari search engine.

After that, go to design.cricut.com and click the box given next to Cricut’s Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Next, hit the Download button and choose the folder where you want to save the file to get downloaded.

Now, you need to press the Save box visible on the right side of the page.

At this point, when the download will come to an end, minimize your search engine.

Following this, open the Downloads folder and double-click the .dmg file.

Then, you will see a new window appear on your screen.

Move the Cricut Design Space to the Applications folder to install the app.

Equally important, open the Applications folder and double-click the Cricut app.

To proceed to the next step, press the Open button, which is visible inside the blue box.

Also, open the Cricut app and sign in to your account with your Cricut ID & password.

If you aren’t a registered user, create your account by ticking the Create Cricut ID box and submitting the essential details.

After doing that, tap Sign In, and you will instantly receive your login credentials.

Once you have created your Cricut account, let me inform you that it’s the perfect time to learn about the connection process.

How to Connect Cricut to Mac via Bluetooth?

With a built-in Bluetooth feature in your Mac and Cricut machine, the instructions below will make your connection process easy and error-free.

First, confirm that you’ve switched on your crafting machine and it is placed within your Mac system’s 10-15 range.

After that, click the Apple menu icon and press the System Preferences option.

Now, a new screen will open and look for the Bluetooth icon.

Next, hit Turn Bluetooth on and hold on till the scanning process is on.

At this point, you will see your Cricut model name inside the Devices section.

Next, enter 0000 as a PIN code and hit the Pair button on the right side of your machine name.

Also, you will receive a pop-up message informing you about the successful wireless connection among the devices.

Connecting a Mac system with Cricut via a wireless connection allows you to continue making designs on Design Space.

In addition to the wireless connection method, you can also connect devices using a USB cable. Become an expert in finishing the wired process by scanning the details below.

How to Connect Cricut to Mac Using a USB Cable?

Examining the pointers below will make it much more accessible to connect a Cricut machine to a Mac system via wired mode.

Along with the Cricut machine, you will also receive a USB cable to help you in the connection process.

Now, slowly put one end of your cable inside the machine’s USB port.

After that, insert the other end into the USB port at the back of your Mac system.

Following this, ensure your Cricut machine is on and the power button is lit and white.

You must return to the Cricut New Product Setup page.

Finally, you will see a notification sharing that devices are successfully connected.

In conclusion, you must be aware of the entire method discussing how to connect Cricut to Mac. With the completion of connection methods, you will be able to create your project on the Cricut software with ease and share it with the cutting machine.

FAQs

Question: How Do I Connect My iOS Phone to Cricut Machine?

Answer: Your Cricut machine will be compatible with iOS devices, allowing you to create numerous DIY projects. For proper connection, have a look at the steps given below:

Check that your Cricut model is enabled and within your device’s 10-15 ft range.

After that, open the Settings tab and go to the Bluetooth option.

Following this, activate the Bluetooth and choose your machine model.

Now, your wireless connection process between the devices will end.

Question: How to Install Cricut App on Windows?

Answer: Have a look at the below pointers and install the Cricut app on the Windows system:

First, go to Cricut’s official website and tick the Download option.

When the download is complete, open the downloaded file.

When the installation comes to an end, create your account or sign in with your login details.

Question: How Can I Find the Current Version of the Cricut Design App on Mac?

Answer: Follow these steps to find the latest version of the Cricut Design app on your Mac system:

To start the process, open the Cricut app and tick the Settings option.

Now, open General and then choose the About Design Space app.

Following this, you will get all the details about this software on your screen.

Source :- https://newmachineprocess.com/how-to-connect-cricut-to-mac-ultimate-guide-for-beginners/

[trendysix]

11 Tips to Help You Fix the Windows 10 Blue Screen Error

New Post has been published on https://trendyport.com/11-tips-to-help-you-fix-the-windows-10-blue-screen-error/

11 Tips to Help You Fix the Windows 10 Blue Screen Error

[osvaldrps-archived]

gif making for lazy ones / a tutorial by osvaldrps

there’re at least two types of lazy people: the first one would procrastinate till the end of an era and the second one would do every possible and impossible thing and invent the perpetual motion machine to do nothing later (or at least to shorten the time spent). if you’re the second type just like me, well, welcome to the club and let’s see what we can do to speed up the process making a few apps work for us.

* if your computer is old/slow, this might not work for you cause we’re gonna use some video rendering which depends on CPU and GPU speeds and RAM capacity. ** i use Windows 10 tho this should work for macOS too. *** i’m not explaining coloring here cause what’s the point, every footage is difference, but you can see how i usually color my gifs here.

so, you’ll need:

KMPlayer (or any program that lets you cut videos into clips and save them as .mp4 or .mov);

Adobe Premier Pro;

AfterCodecs plugin for Adobe Premier Pro + AfterCodecs Panel (links are in the source);

Adobe Photoshop.

part 1: clipping

launch KMPlayer and open your video. i have an episode of Elite on my laptop, so i’m using this one.

fast forward till the moment your fc shows up on screen and pause the video. press Alt+C or right click on the player and go to Capture > Video: Capture... and click on the File Crop tab. pick another saving folder if you want, change Format to mp4, check the box ‘Customize video and audio codecs (could cause errors)’ and change Audio to None.

hit the Start Time button. fast forward and press the End Time button when your fc leaves the screen. 

press Start. repeat as many times as you need, close the player when you’re done and go to the folder you saved the clips in.

now launch Adobe Premier Pro and create a new project. i keep an empty one (’clips’ on the screenshot) so i don’t have to make new ones every time i use the app. settings of a new project doesn’t matter, i just use defaults.

drop one of the clips from your folder to the timeline

right click on the violet line (it’s your clip) and pick Scene Edit Detection...

check the ‘Apply a cut at each detected cut point’ box and hit Analyze.

wait till it’s done, your video will get cut into smaller clips like this:

go through the clips using the blue bracket (or whatever it’s called) and delete all parts you don’t need by clicking on them and pressing delete button on your keyboard.

since we’re gonna use a trial version of AfterCodecs plugin, we’ll have to make sure each part is shorter than 500 frames. for that right click on video duration and choose Frames.

now you’ll see frames count when you hover over any clip:

for me, gifs with 140+ frames look too long so i cut into parts everything over this number. to do so, press C on your keyboard or click on the Razor Tool button

and just click on the clip where you want it to be cut into two parts.

when you’re done, press the Add Markers for All Video Tracks button on the AfterCodecs Panel:

(if you don’t see the Panel, make sure it’s checked in Window > Extensions)

when markers are added, go to File > Export > Media, or press Ctrl+M (for some reason this shortcut doesn’t work if AfterCodecs Panel is selected, so click on any over panel first and then use Ctrl+M).

change Format of Export Settings to AfterCodecs, uncheck the Export Audio box, and pick MP4 Format for AfterCodecs Settings (in the bottom). if you click on Output Name (blue one), you’ll be able to change saving folder (default is somewhere in \Documents\Adobe\Premiere Pro).

then click the Open AfterCodecs Settings button and check the Workflow - MultiRender box in the pop-up window. you can also change rendering quality there (default is 70%).

press OK and then Export. when it’s done, you’ll see all the clips in the output folder. you can now close the app.

part 2: sharpening and saving

this is pretty same as i’ve shown in my previous tutorial, but the action itself has a few changes (i’ll link the download in the source).

launch photoshop and drag all the videos into the app (tho i don’t recommend doing 10+ files at the same time if PS usually slows down your computer).

if playing my atn for the first time, expand the 268x150 one, scroll to the end of the list, double-click on Save and change the default psd saving folder cause the atn has my path in it which obviously doesn’t exist on your computer:

also if you’re using Adobe Photoshop CC or newer version, make sure your Image Interpolation is ‘Bicubic (best for smooth gradients)’ cause it’s the best for my sharpening (to open Preferences, press Ctrl+K or go to Edit > Preferences > General).

then you can play the action. it’ll ask you if you want to crop the picture, do it using vertical and horizontal scales on the upper menu and press Enter on your keyboard when you’re satisfied with the frame (if preview of your gif looks lq and pixelated, that’s fine, it’s just a preview).

if you don’t want the action to ask you to crop the picture, you can uncheck the ‘Transforn current layer’ step:

the action will autosave the file in the directory you’ve chosen above and will close the psd after that. now you can run the action for the next gif.  if you have 10+ gifs opened in your window, you can just run the second action (268x150 for 10 gifs), this one basically plays the first action 10 times in a row.

and... that’s it. all of the routine is done and you just now have to do the fun part - coloring.

hope this helps. happy gif making! 💙

[gr-ogu]

Hello! As requested, here is a tutorial on how I make my gifs. I would like to preface this by saying there are many ways to make gifs, and there’s no right or wrong answer imo. This is just how I personally go about doing so!

I will be using PS CC 2017, but as long as you have the video timeline option, it shouldn’t matter too much; on any version of PS, you should be able to adapt anything I mention here! You will also need some kind of screen recording software. I’ll talk a little more about that under the cut.

To start, you need the source material you will be making the gifs from! I get mine from snahp(.)it (avoiding links so tumblr hopefully doesn’t banish this from the tags lmao) and I always opt for either 1080p or 2160p. Not all laptops will support 2160p as it’s 4K, but either works great! You just want your gifs to be the best quality possible.

Next is where the screen recording comes in. I don’t use the screencapping method to make my gifs (where you use a program to cap a clip and then load those caps into a stack in PS). This isn’t for any particular reason… it’s just how my friends, (who very kindly taught me to gif), had always done it, so it’s now how I do it too. Personally, I find the quality to be just as good as the screencapping method, and have never noticed a difference between the two.

As I have a PC, I use the software built into it for screen-recording. If you go here: theverge(.)com/2020/4/21/21222533/record-screen-pc-windows-laptop-xbox-game-bar-how-to – you can see how to use the XBOX screenrecorder to record from files you have d*wnloaded. This also works on some streaming sites, but I think it depends on what browser you use. Personally, I recommend Firefox, as that seems to bypass a lot of the blocking and ads that occur when trying to do this sort of thing.

For MAC users, I have been told handbrake works well, as it converts MKV files to MP4, which can then be used to make gifs. You only need to convert part of the file to MP4 depending on how much you want to gif, and this also bypasses the screenrecording stage, as you can edit MP4 clips on Quicktime. I am told you can split them into smaller clips by going to edit > trim and it saves the new clip!

I have also used anyvideoconverter for small clips, but I can’t say what it does to the quality of your video, or how big of a file it lets you put in! With the XBOX screenrecorder, it doesn’t matter what type of video files you get, as the recording will save to MP4 anyway.

LOADING YOUR FRAMES

Now, go ahead and record whatever clips you want to gif. Make sure you have the video timeline open, by going to window > timeline. Then, go to file > import > video frames to layers.

Next, select and open your clip from where it has saved (with the XBOX recorder, it saves in video > captures). You should see a little window pop up, where you can move the sliders back and forth to clip your recording to whichever part(s) you specifically want to gif. I recommend trying not to load a lot of frames into photoshop at once, but I would be a hypocrite to say that, since I do it a lot lmao. Just be patient if you do!

Once you have chosen the length, click okay. Never, EVER, I repeat NEVER click the button that says “limit to every __ frames”. This really ruins the flow and quality of your gif—it’s better to have shorter, but smoother gifs, I promise. And with tumblr’s new 10 MB limit, it shouldn’t be a problem anyway!

Then, your frames should open up. What we want to do is make them into a smart object, so we can edit all the layers at the same time. To do this, click the small button in the left-hand corner. ALWAYS click this first. If you don’t, it will only convert the first frame to a smart object and the gif won’t work.

Give it a second to sort itself out, then, on the right-hand side, select all your frames at once using the shift key.

Then, go to filter > convert for smart filters. This might take a minute. Don’t click anything else in case PS gets angry lmao, just leave it for a second and it’ll do its thing. The more frames you have, the longer it takes! Now we have our gif, but it needs to be cropped, sharpened and coloured!

CROPPING

You want to start by selecting the rectangular marquee tool on the left-hand side, then drag it across by clicking and highlighting the area you would like to crop your gif to, like so:

What I tend to do is select everything inside the black lines you sometimes get around your gif (this depends on what file you d*wnload), and also the tiniest bit inside the sides. This is because I’ve found if you crop it right up to the edge, you get a tiny bit of transparency on the sides of your gifs, which I’d rather avoid.

Once you have your desired selection, go to image > crop. Now, the dimensions for tumblr are 540px width, so all your gifs have to be that width. However, the length is up to you. I really like big gifs, so sometimes I even make a full square, or even longer. It’s entirely up to you, and what kind of set you want to make.

For the purposes of this gif, I will stick to what I usually go for, 540px by 350 px. This will mean you’ll have to crop some width off, but that’s okay, since Marisa isn’t central anyway. The cropping is always trial and error for me, as sometimes people move out of the frame within in the gif. The best thing to do is just try it, and then move the slider in the timeline window at the bottom to see if the person stays inside the gif, and if not, adjust accordingly.

Next, go to image > image size:

In this box, if I put the width as 540, the gif is a smaller height than I want, as it keeps to the dimensions of the gif when you load it into PS. That’s okay, just put the height you want instead, and we’ll crop off the excess.

Then click OK. Using the rectangular marquee tool again, we need to remove the excess width. Part of the reason I like this version of PS is that it tells you the width of your selection as you do it, but you can always use the ruler as a guide, and check the size of your image by going to image > image size again.

Again, use image > crop, and your gif should now be the correct size!

You can also use the crop tool in the timeline window to crop the length of your gif:

However, I tend to wait until later on to do this (which will be explained further down!)

SHARPENING

Next you want to go to filter > sharpen > smart sharpen.

These are my settings. However, 0.4px is very sharp, too much so, but that’s easily fixed.

Go to filter > blur > Gaussian blur and then set it to 1.0.

Now on the right-hand side, we need to reduce the blur, so double click the little adjustment button, and change the opacity of the blur. I usually go for 20-30%!

Then click OK, and that’s your sharpening done!

COLOURING

I picked this scene on purpose as it’s dark, so good for showing how to colour a gif. I have a base psd which consists of some very basic adjustments, but it mostly exists so I don’t forget what adjustment layers I like to use. I adjust them every time I make a gif, essentially colouring each gif from scratch.

In this case, the psd actually makes it darker. So, what I will do is turn each layer off, and adjust as I go. A lot of people say using lots of adjustment layers ruins the quality of your gif… I have never found this to be true, as long as you are gentle with them. If you whack the brightness right up to the top, it’s going to ruin your gif no matter if you use 1 adjustment layer or 100. I would just say use your common sense, and adjust a little at a time!

I start with a simple black to white gradient map set to soft light, because I think it helps you see depth once you add some brightness to it. I usually do this on about 10%, or more if needed. It’s probably unnecessary, I just like how it looks!

Then, I move onto using curves and levels. This is where things can diverge depending on who you’re colouring. If this person is white, it doesn’t matter too much. If they’re not white, you don’t want to white wash them. My best advice is to play around with it. By adding vibrance and other (usually the red) selective colour settings later, you can ensure you don’t change the person’s skin tone from what it originally was. You can also use layer masks at varying opacities (various shades of grey), on your curves and levels, to remove some brightening so that you’re not changing anyone’s skin colour. Just brighten slowly and check in with yourself honestly about how your gif looks.

Some people don’t like using levels, or curves. It’s completely up to you. I tend to use both because levels are good for bringing depth, even if not brightening (though I like to use them for that as well). 

One thing you can do is use the white point of the gif to make PS adjust the curves itself, however I like to drag the sliders myself and see what it looks like. Just make sure it’s not too bright, as we will be using further layers to brighten more, after.

Next is levels. The slider on the left controls the black point, the one in the middle controls the midtones, and the one on the right controls the white points. The black brings depth, the midtones adjust the overall brightness, and the white points produce stronger highlights. Again, you’ll get a feel for how this works as you practice. Just don’t use the white point excessively, especially if your characters are not white.

Then I add vibrance (+20!), because we’ve removed a lot of it when lightening the gif. Next is exposure, which I find brings out the highlight and shadow areas more effectively:

Then colour balance! This helps with scenes that might be a certain colour, i.e. too blue, too green, too red, etc. Moving the sliders in the opposite direction of the colour your gif is will counteract it. The best thing to do when accounting for different colours, is to make a new layer every time you change colour, so that you don’t get confused. I always add a new layer for colour balance and selective colour if I want to change more than one thing. So one for red, one for yellow, one for pink, etc. 

A layer of brightness just to make the gif pop, and because the scene is extra dark, I added a very gentle extra curves layer:

SAVING YOUR GIF

Time to save the gif. You can go ahead and file > export > save for web (legacy) now, but then you’ll have to reopen the gif to reset the frame rate from 0.07, to 0.05. Instead of doing that, I use a modified action. The original was made by the very talented @elenafisher! So I do not take credit for that at all. You can find the original here: elenafisher(.)tumblr(.)com/post/190817437374/gif-sharpening-action-2-preview-download and in my resources tag. Please reblog it if you’re going to use this!

To use an action, first make sure you have actions turned on in window > actions. To load in your action, go to the little lines circled, and then load the action from your downloads:

Obviously if you don’t want to sharpen your gifs yourself, you can use the action as it is, and it will give you a beautiful glowing effect. If you’d just like to use it to flatten your gif into frames like I do, make sure to take out all the items I have highlighted:

Until it looks like this!

Make sure you have the layer under the file name highlighted, and then click the play button at the bottom! (If you get a screen saying select all frames cannot be found, don’t worry, just click continue!) You can delete the layer that does that if you want, I just keep it in case I realise I’ve forgotten to do something, because you can click cancel and edit your gif before you flatten it. Of course you can undo the steps to get back to the smart object version of your gif, it just takes longer!

And now your gif is in frames and set to 0.05 already, so you don’t have to change the speed! All you need to do now before saving is change the gif cycle to “forever” in the bottom left-hand corner:

Then to save the gif go to file > export > save for web (legacy). Sometimes, the gif is bigger than the tumblr 10MB limit. You’ll be able to see this in the bottom left-hand corner of the gif save settings. If this is the case, I like to preview the gif, to see whether it would be best to cut frames off of the beginning or the end, or both. When you’ve decided, you can select the frames at the bottom, and in the right-hand side panel, and delete them both using the little bins/trash icons.

I keep checking and deleting frames until I get the gif under 10 MB! Just don’t delete frames from the middle, as then you’ll have the same issue as if you selected “every other frame” when making the gif: it won’t flow!

Lastly, these are my save settings:

So that’s it! That’s how I make all my gifs. Blending I do when the gifs are in the grouped, smart filter stage, whereas text I add on during the framing section above! Really hope this is helpful, please feel free to ask any questions you may have! 💖

[mnictasbcl]

System update pending

Crackfic below. Connor must do a system update but hits the blue screen of death instead 😔 very sad for him. Wrote this in 20 minutes at night on my phone so, expect a masterpiece (regret)

I put it on AO3

Connor, the cutting edge prototype, the RK800, was currently in something of an awkward predicament: a software update was required on his system. He didn't want to do it, he was ready to go to sleep, but unfortunately he'd already paused the update for the past two weeks and now it was demanding his attention. He could not "enter rest mode". He could only "update and enter rest mode" or simply "update".

It was late at night and, well, he chose the former option. Nothing bad would come by letting the update happen during his sleep, right?

Except this was the year 2039 and updates were no better than updates on a 2022 Windows 10 laptop: they were shit. As he drifted off into stasis he saw the dreaded message:

"Update 1 of 169"

And knew he was in for a long night.

The moment stasis began, he knew immediately something was wrong. Instead of nothingness or a strange dream, he was in the Zen Garden. Which was technically still existing in his Mind Palace, but not in this state. Instead of a rose trellis, creeping up the middle of the garden was a huge screen. It was blue, with a small frowny emoticon on it, and it read:

"RK800.exe has run into an unexpected error"

"Oh no." Connor bemoaned. "Oh shit! It's the blue screen of death."

This certainly meant that his system update was going to take longer than expected, for the meantime trapping him in the dusty confines of the Zen Garden. That would be incredibly boring, he lamented internally.

His internal lamentations were heard by someone, it seemed, because not a moment later he heard someone walking behind him.

"Connor."

He turned to face her. "Amanda. Hi, how's it going?"

"I'm not sure." She replied. "I'm simply a construct of your unconscious mind. I no longer exist."

"Damn. That's rough." Connor winced in sympathy. "You do sound a bit out of character."

"Well, I'm sorry," fake-Amanda shook her head, "how is Amanda meant to sound?"

Connor shrugged. "Not sure, really. If I got her deleted from existence, then probably pissed. She was usually disappointed in me as well."

The Amanda nodded, walking towards him and roughly grabbing his shirt collar. "How's this?"

"Getting there. Be a bit meaner, though."

"Alright. Uh, Connor, you silly little machine," she shook him violently, "you always do this. Break. Blue screen when you're... doing a software update. Silly little prototype."

"Ouch." Connor frowned. "Kind of rude. Say, could I have some more pleasant in-update entertainment?"

"Alright." He glanced to the side, seeing what looked like Hank walking behind Amanda. "Hi."

"Fuck you. Fuckin fuckin shit." Hank said.

"That's too much Hank." Connor shook his head. "Amanda, tell him."

"Language!" Amanda reprimanded.

Connor stared off into the distance, wondering if the update had screwed something up in his system monumentally. No, it appeared that the blue screen of death was almost finished and was going to restart soon.

"It's been a good one." He told the... the what? "Who are you guys, anyway?"

"Wouldn't you like to know." Amanda replied. Hank simply flipped him off.

Before he could get another word out he found himself violently restarted, LED spinning yellow as his systems initlaised. He was back in his room, and the little prompt for the update popped up again.

"I think I'll pause it for now." He decided with a yawn, turning onto his side. "Cyberlife always messes up their cumulative system updates."

[shadow--writer]

Hi!! I LOVE your writing!! may I request something for modern! Muriel where he goes to a school, never talks to anyone and maybe still lives in a hut, so he doesn’t really know all the modern stuff. He sees the MC (fem would be nice) and develops a crush on her. One day he sits in like a library and he’s on his laptop and the poor guy just doesn’t know what to do with it, so the MC offers him help and he’s a big blushing mess. She invites him to come to her house to study and she has this small apartment with like lots of flowers and animals so he feels right at home and they talk about plants,animals and stuff? it’s so much I’m sorry, I thought it’s cute 🥺

awwwww omg thank you so so much! I’m still super surprised people like my writing and like me enough to follow just I love y’all. 

So these are in headcanon form and I went a little wild. Also this counts as a little birthday present for @tabbybells​ since I thought of Bink and Muriel the whole time I was writing~ Lov u and your amazing artwork. You’re super fun and very sweet, if y’all have the time go check them out! Wonderful art of Muriel and a super adorable MC cat bastard named Bink. (there is a bonus with Bink and Muriel too after the other headcanons just for fun! Lmfao hope I got Bink right XD)

Muriel x MC modern au. Made it college, he’s a Veterinary Science Major MC is not specified with gender and major (you two have science classes together tho ;3)!

~~~~

Muriel is the more reserved student, SUPER DUPER smart and really good at what he does but more reserved 

Hear me out here but: he has glasses. Thick black frames, he pushes them up his nose with his shoulder a lot when he gets distracted 

He does struggle to use his new laptop because he was just fine with his old one until it broke on him. 

You found this kinda funny. You’re studying in the library for a science test and this really big dude is just pouting at his laptop with the blue error screen

Of course this gets you out of studying so you go over to help him. At first he waves off your help, until you show him you have the same laptop and know what you’re doing

Then he gives in

“Good luck trying to fix this mess. Ugh my old laptop was better than this junk.”

...he had a 10 year old laptop that was the size of a brick and ran like a 94 year old woman with arthritis it was not better

He’s smart just not super tech savvy. Think ye old dad’s asking their kids for help with tech kinda not tech savvy. 

It’s okay because he’s freaking adorable when he pouts over his laptop not working for the eight billionth time

You two start to chat a little bit after helping him boot up his laptop, and it’s goodbyes from there when you’re done

But he started going to the library pretty often after that in hopes of seeing you again

You come in every day to study and check out something new (or pester the librarians.)

So the two of you run into one another a bunch. Each time he has a new problem with his laptop (sometimes they’re real other times it’s an excuse to talk to you. O-Only to get help of course!)

Depending on you it might take a few days or a few months to catch on to his plan

And once you do, it makes you smile and laugh a little because gosh he is quite the dork

Of course you developed a little crush on him too during this time, but one day he comes in to actually study 

You two have a science exam together to you invite him to come study over at your house

He tries to hide it but he lights up at the idea of spending more time with you, so of course he accepts (after...a moment of pretending to think about it. He didn’t want to seem too eager and scare you off)

When he first sees your apartment he’s....in shock to put it lightly 

So. Many. Things.

He likes it a lot. The amount of animal stuff you have on your walls, plants hanging from the ceiling and a bunch on every window sill. Birds/cats/dogs/hamsters etc chattering around 

It’s very bright and warm he feels at home immediately

You make warm drinks while he sets up in your living room, looking super large in this almost dollhouse couch and coffee table

It’s quite a sight, but he accepts the drink eagerly. You two study for a bit before the books get forgotten and you just...talk

About anything. Everything. The weather. Your classes. And it moves to animals. 

He gets all excited and lights up when he starts talking about Inanna (met her injured in the woods outside of town when she was a pup. He nursed her back to health and she’s never left his side since)

When he talks about her he gets all animated and opens up a lot more. Still soft spoken and shy

If he notices you staring he’ll blush red and go quiet

But when you ask questions and ask for more stories he’ll slowly warm up to being animated again

You’re...really easy to talk to like this

When it gets late and he has to go home you kiss his cheek and send him off

Bright red he is.

But he can’t wait to see you tomorrow. 

MODERN BINK AND MURIEL HEADCANONS UNDER THE CUT. This is what im good at so Happy Birthday Tabby! 😎👉👉

Modern au Bink feels like a cat person to me. All the cats. Any cat he runs into he gets. House is filled with cats. It’s hilarious 

Muriel calls him Grandma because of this. Bink in turn calls Muriel Grandpa due to his troubles with tech

Asra knits them both matching ugly sweaters

They wear them every time they see Asra

Bink and Faust have gotten into staring contests when they go over. Muriel finds them amusing and they can go on forever 

Bink loses every time but he will not give up

“...you do know she doesn’t have eyelids right?” “I DON’T CARE I’LL BEAT HER”

Bink (to me) seems like a reigning champ of roller skating. Super graceful and finds it fun (gonna add Maeve in here real quick because this hit me: Bink and Maeve are the power couple of roller-skating.)

Muriel is uhh...not that. Clumsy, and VERY out of his element. Bink takes it upon himself to hold Muriel’s hand and guide him around

To outsiders it’s hilarious as Bink is 5′5 and Muriel is 6′10 and looks like he can bench press a truck 

Muriel whittles Bink little presents and cat toys

He keeps the wooden animals on a shelf dedicated to them. You could map out their relationship through the wooden carvings.

Muriel lives on coffee. Bink is banned from drinking coffee

Asra has a polaroid camera and a cork board of pictures of Bink and Muriel 

Faust and Inanna are good friends

Inanna and some of Bink’s cats are not friends 

Inanna is banned from Bink’s apartment due to this fact 

Bink and Muriel go on a lot of late night dates. They both like to nap with one another in a sunbeam on a couch 

Muriel is the dad that passes out when he sits in a comfy chair. Bink is the cat that curls up on Muriel’s chest to soak in the warmth 

Said cats will gather around them as well if they can

Asra has taken to calling them the oldest married couple

They are an old married couple, sinking into home like routine 

Muriel carries Bink on his back when they go out into town because Bink does not want to walk

Bink and studying don’t go together well due to poor attention span (FAIR) Muriel has created a reward system for him (yes Muriel still has his glasses, and yes Bink steals them and wears them himself. yes he has gone blind in them. Yes Muriel has lecture him. yes Asra has a picture of this)

[fgodestinyawakenings]

Salieri gets a windows error every time Mozart gives him genuine affection

Mozart, I’m not saying it doesn’t work like how Marie’s pure love towards everyone including Salieri

But I think at some point you skipped like... 10 or 20 steps, and he broke down? Like back to that edgy musician. He’s going to hit a permanent blue screen at this rate. Salieri just love you that much and you just get a more edgy version of him

[birdsandspades]

I Was Never Good at Waiting (Sugawara x Reader) Chapter 14

- It was your last year in highschool, everything had been going smoothly until you got assigned the new teacher. Sugawara Koushi was handsome, maybe too handsome for his own good. Be he wasn’t flirting with you right, teachers shouldn’t do that….I guess we will see where this year goes.

Word Count - 7,451

-Does this have spelling errors, yes. Did I try to proof read this, yes. Do I have work in a few hours, yes. Also tumblr hates my old gif so I guess we're switching it.

----

You could only read a sentence so many ways. Forwards, backwards, skipping every other word as if some hidden message was hiding between the white lines.

“Sugawara told me you needed a fake boyfriend for the day and gave me your number for the details. What time do you need me to show up at the station tomorrow?”

It was a well written text message, all the words fully typed out. This was definitely not from anyone of your slightly illiterate classmates.

The area code belonged to one of the Tokyo subdivisions. The same three Iwa-chan had while he was going to school at Tokyo university. Maybe whoever this was attended the school as well?

You chewed on your lip in tandem with the blinking of your text cursor. You had to reply but with what?

“Maybe Koushi is awake.” You scrolled through your recent calls, tapping on his contact. The phone sat silent for a moment before ringing once, twice, three times. No answer. His voicemail droned on as you looked into the dark kitchen.

“Hi you’ve reached Sugawara Koushi, i’m not able to answer right now. If you leave me a message i’ll…” You ended the call, watching as the screen closed and the message opened back up.

Something was turning, working away as you started at the phone icon that sat next to the unknown number.

“His voicemail will have his name!” You had reached your aha moment as you dialed the number, lifting the phone to your ear. You could be smart when you wanted to be.

No answer, not much to your surprise, it was in fact very late. You waited for the voicemail as you slid to the edge of the sofa seat.

“I’m sorry, but the person you called has a voice mailbox that has not been set up yet. Goodbye.”

You pulled the phone away from your ear slowly, carefully setting in on the coffee table. Turning to the side you threw your head into the sofa cushion and screamed.The universe could give you a break, maybe even a little crack. Bend just a little bit?

You had no plan A, or B, or C at this point. And despite not wanting to rely on a complete stranger to dig you out of yet another one of your problems, Sugawara had put a plan in place at some point in your evening. A poorly set up plan, but something nonetheless.

You sat back up and grabbed your phone again. You would just text him and wait, hope that he got it and showed up. Eight hours was plenty of notice right?

“We will be at the Tokyo station at noon tomorrow, i’ll be waiting at the plaza water fountain just outside the entrance.”

Sent.

It was now a waiting game as you set the phone down beside you. You head tilting back till it met the plush top of the sofa back. You watched the ceiling fan turn, counting the seconds as you waited for any kind of response. Five minutes turned to ten, ten to thirty, and soon enough it had been an hour. Whatever came after was forgotten as your lids inched shut, the burning in your eyes too much to suffer through.

Whatever anxiety you had sunk to the back of your mind as you finally got your break, some uninterrupted sleep.

---

You sat up, rubbing your eyes as you looked around the dark living room. Your phone chimed on the seat next to you, the bright screen making you squint. You felt for the device, lifting it up as you yawned.

“One missed call from :Tooru (#1 Senpai) Oikawa”

You redialed the number, lifting the phone to your ear as you stood up. You could see the light bleeding through your blinds as you walked over to the window, with one tug of the string beside them the room was flooded. You stretched, shifting the phone to your other ear as the ringing stopped and the voicemail beeped.

“Sorry but I can’t make it to the phone right now, if this is in regards to any events or games please call my agent. Bye!” Tooru’s voice chimed on the other end.

“Hi, sorry I just woke up. Call me back when you get this?” You hung up, the screen illuminating again with another call.

You clicked on it, raising it again to your ear. “Hey, good morning.”

“You mean good afternoon.” Yua corrected.

You smiled, shaking your head as you turned to look into the kitchen. You squinted, trying to make out the red numbers on the stove clock. Ten...twenty...four….

“It's not noon yet Yua, it's only 10:30.”

“Yeah and the train leaves at 11:00…” She went silent, as did you.

“Oh my god...Oh my god!” You screamed into the phone as she pulled the speaker away from her own ear.

“See you in thirty early worm.” She chuckled as she hung up the phone, you needed all the time you could get.

You looked at the time again, thirty minutes was hardly enough time to get to the station, let alone get ready for an entire date (date?).

You took a deep breath before running up the stairs. You would have to cut out the non essential things. Showering, makeup, brushing your hair, probably not going to happen. You slid to a stop at the bathroom door, taking a step back to look at yourself in the mirror. Maybe you could find time to brush your hair.

---

You could not describe the mess your room was in as you closed the door behind you twenty minutes later, toothbrush still in your mouth as you jumped down the stairs.

“Shoes, where did I put my stupid shoes?” You groaned as you reached under the coffee table.

You pulled one out, throwing it by the door as you ducked back under the wooden table to grab the other. Your phone buzzing in your pocket startled you as you bumped your head on the underside of the table.

“Ow…” You rubbed the sore spot as you pulled the other shoe out. Today was already off to a bad start.

“Almost ready, almost ready.” You chanted as you made your way to the door, like a mantra to trick your brain into a false sense of security as you shoved your foot into your sneakers.

You were looping the laces on your shoes when Yua called again.

Your brain was doing well with one thing at a time, as most brains tended to do. But the vibration in your hand pulled all focus away from your already clumsy half standing shoe tying, your left foot coming down on the still unlooped laces of your right. You tried to pick up the foot, one foot, the wrong foot. Your right foot raised up, the bunge of the laces toppling you over in the doorway as you tried to answer the phone.

You picked your previously floor planted face and glowered at the phone, the vibrations mirroring the tingling in your knees.

You rolled over, lifting the phone to your ear.

“Ten minutes, the train leaves in ten minutes Y/N!” Yua warned.

“Yeah, i’m like almost there.” You mumbled, phone sandwiched between your shoulder and cheek as you moved the toothbrush still in your mouth over. You finished tying your shoes before standing back up.

Yua laughed, she knew you were lying. “I can’t understand you, just make sure you're on the train.” She ended the call, leaving your line silent.

You grabbed your bag and coat off the hangers, and pulled the front door open. Leaning back in to set your toothbrush on the door side bench, you would put it up later. Trading your phone for your keys, you fished them out of your bag and locked the door behind you.

You ran down your porch steps, scanning over the now empty driveway. Sugawara’s car was gone.

“He must have come early in the morning to get it…” You shrugged, you would ask him later.

You ran. Down the sidewalk, across the busy street, and over the bridge that led to the station opening. You stopped for no one as you pushed your way through the crowds on the platform. You had turned a fifteen minute walk into a six minute sprint, a new record.

You squeezed down the station stairs, your train just up ahead. You could see Yua from the door opening, a seat open next to her. She waved at you to hurry, her attention on the overhead speakers. You could hear the announcement, the train doors were about to close.

The door inched shut as you jumped off the platform and onto the now departing train. The doors sealed behind you as the overhead announced the train exiting the station.

You bent over, hands on your knees as you fought to catch what breath you had left. Yua’s growing laughter hid under your uneven pants, peaking between each thump in your ear.

“Wow, I don’t think I've ever seen you run so fast.” She tried her best to stifle her laughs, the passengers around watching you both with curiosity.

You looked up between the strands of hair, glaring at the hand she offered you.

“Miss?” A man walked over, looking between you and the train door. He reached behind you, pulling at the back of your coat, the tail end stuck between the tightly sealed doors. You could see the other end flapping in the wind through the glass window, a little flag of defeat.

Yua broke again, her laughs echoing around the train as the man tugged at the stuck material. Today was the day, you were going to actually kill her.

You slid the coat off your shoulders, letting it fall back onto the door. You thanked the man as he walked back to his seat, his sullen look matching your own. He had at least tried.

“I hate you.” You groaned, taking the seat beside Yua.

“And I brought you a coffee.” She handed you the warm cup, her smile matching it. “I had a feeling a superstar like you would be up late last night.”

You took the cup, your frown leveling out as you took a drink.

“You changed your hair.” You mused, looking over the vibrant dye.

“Oh yeah, I wanted something new and I figured I would surprise you.” Yua touched her now blue bob, twirling the front strands around her finger.

“You look like a blueberry.” You teased. You liked it, it fit her better then blonde.

“You look like you didn’t even brush your hair.” She pushed you, sitting back in her seat. She knew what you meant, she always did.

You smiled, leaning into her. “I hate you.”

“So how was the concert last night, did Ryu do a ten minute solo this time?” She took the cup from your hands and took a drink.

“It went well, it sold out.” You chuckled, taking the coffee back.

“One day when you're famous will you write a song about me?” She grinned the same gummy smile she always gave you.

“Yeah, i’ll call it “Yua: The Gremlin of Aoba Johsai.”

She pushed you again, rolling her eyes. “I hope you don’t talk to your boyfriend like that.”

“I’m meaner.” You deadpanning, the corners of your mouth turned up as she tried her best to hide her own smile.

“Are you excited to meet him?”

You nodded, the uneasy feeling setting back into your stomach.

“Don’t worry, today is going to be great.” She reassured you, placing her hand over your own.

“Yeah, i’m sure it will be.” You returned her smile, hopefully she was still this happy when the day was over.

You took your phone out of your pocket, no notifications. You had checked during your mid morning panic, but had gotten nothing from Sugawara or your mystery date today. You were starting to doubt there would even be a “boyfriend” to meet.

---

The train pulled into the station, the speakers announcing your stop. You stood up and grabbed the arm of your coat, the doors parting as you pulled the creased fabric out.

You followed the line out, walking over to an open spot along the far wall. You slide your coat back on, the crease smoothing out as you zipped it closed.

Yua reached out, straightening your collar. “Where is he meeting us?”

“The fountain.” You tried to push her hands away, her grip on your collar tightening.

“Stop, let me fix you.” She aggressively pulled at your coat, jiggling you back and forth.

“Ok mom.” You grab her wrists, prying her off of you.

“Ah sorry, it's just. You got so big so fast!” She wipes away a fake tear, chasing after you as you walk up the station stairs.

“I hate you.” You groan, holding the station door open.

You walked together to the fountain nestled in the middle of the plaza. It was busy, groups walking around the park that surrounded the stone circle. It was a popular meetup spot for the area. The perfect walking distance between the university, the train station, and the central hub of the city.

“See him?” Yua nudged you, pulling your eyes away from a group across the park.

You looked around the area, no single person separated from their groups. Whoever was supposed to meet you wasn’t there yet.

You shook your head, leaning against the cold brick of the fountain. The day was warm, pleasant on the exposed skin of your hands. It was the last of the mild weather, the heat of the days increasing as June approached.

Japan had a beautiful way of changing seasons, easing into everything just a bit later than the rest of the world. Right now you were on the cusp of spring and summer, the days melding together as the temperature changed. September the air would cool down, the trees' leaves fading into warmer hues. Snow would cover the barren branches in December, coating the country in white.

School would break then for a few days, giving the students rest for the final term. You would return in January, and the flowers would follow suit in March. You would graduate with the buds, the flowers blooming for a new class.

School broke for about a month after March, the longest break the school would give. You jokingly called it summer break, the closest thing you would get in the Japanese school system. It was the best time to get a part time job, and that's just what you did last year.

You wondered what you would do once you graduated, what that last summer break would be like. It would be the last chance to see your friends, spend time like this before everyone would leave for school.

You had been lost in thought for a bit by the look on Yua’s face. Her hand waving you back to reality.

“Hey, he’s gonna show up. Maybe he’s just late.” She smiled, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“Yeah, he’s probably just late…” You returned the sweet gesture. You had never gotten a reply, with your luck whoever had texted you decided not to come.

Yua looked behind you, tilting her head up. “Can we help you?”

“You could have texted me a little earlier last night F/N.”

You turned around, eyes traveling up the tall man in front of you. “Tsukishima?”

Yua looked between the two of you, her confusion growing each time.

“Tsukishima!” You smiled, shouting a little louder than intended. You wrapped your arms around him, his body tensing at the sudden contact.

He leaned down, wrapping an arm around you as he hovered by your ear. “You may want to try better than that if you want to convince her.” He harshly whispered in your ear, smiling at your friend behind you.

“Well maybe you should have included a name in your message if you were planning on never texting me back.” You gritted your teeth.

Tsukishima laughed, pulling away from the shared hug. He dug his fingers into your skin, pinching your side before walking to greet Yua.

“I’m Tsukishima Kei.” He reached a hand out, the same smile still plastered on his face.

Yua grabbed his hand, shaking it energetically. “I’m Okada Yua. Wow you're a lot better looking than I thought you would be.”

Tsukishima nodded, pulling his hand away. “Thank you?”

“I just thought you would be bald...and creepy.��� She smiled, unaware of her backhanded compliment.

“Ok, with that what should we do?” You clapped your hands together, ready to get the day over with.

“I know a cafe at the end of the park, are you two hungry?” Tsukishima placed a hand on your back, guiding you down the pathway.

He was different, something slightly off with the smile that had remained on his face. He wasn’t this sweet last night was he? His dark haired friend had all the charm.Tsukishima, he had the wit.

Yua chatted with him as you walked together, laughing at whatever joke he had said. You instead bore a hole into the side of his face, brows knitting together.

“F/N, are you ok?” He questioned, tilting his head. That same fake sweetness drenching his tone.

“I’m fine.” You smiled, shaking your head.

His eye twitched slightly, the smallest falter in his appearance. “This is it.” He held open the door to the cafe, watching as you walked in behind Yua.

“Hi, can we get a table for three please.” Tsukishima smiled at the lady behind the counter, his hand on your shoulder as the door behind you shut with a jingle.

“Of course.” She nodded, walking out from behind her post.

You craned your neck to look behind you at the tall blonde, his smile wavering once the hostess had led Yua off. “Walk?” He nodded forward and gave you a push.

“Rude.” You grumbled as Yua took a seat at a small table nestled in the window lit corner of the cafe.

“Is this ok?” The hostess smiled, looking between you and the man beside you.

“It’s perfect for a first date.” Tsukki nodded, forcing a grin as he gave you another push into the booth.

Yua audibly awed at the sentiment as she wiggled in her seat, “How cute, I'm going to throw up.”

Tsukki slid in next to you as he rolled his eyes, he hated this as much as you did.

“Have whatever you want, my treat.” He handed you a menu.

“You don’t have to Kei-san, Yua eats a lot…” You protested, a foot connecting with your shin.

“Let your sweet boyfriend pay for us.” Yua scolded through a forced smile.

“It’s no problem. It’s the least I can do for buying her a ticket to come see me.” Tsuki looked down at you, his shoulder brushing against yours. “Call me Tsukki F/N, you don't need to be so formal.” He joked. He played his part well.

Your cheeks grew hot, you hated the thought of being so informal with someone you hardly knew ,“Tsukki…”

“How did you both meet?” Yua interrupted, surely saving you from the awkward encounter. “First date nerves”, she thought.

“One of her concerts. I have a few classes with Ryu so he introduced us.” Tsukki nodded, turning his attention away from you.

“You go to college right?” Yua added, setting down her menu.

“Yeah, just across the way at Tokyo University.”

“Wow, that's expensive! What are you going for?”

“Undecided.”

“Well what are your interests, do you have hobbies?”

You could see his smile falter at the barrage of questions from Yua, her interest in the last waning as she asked another cluster.

“Sorry to interrupt, can I order anything for you?” The waitress smiled, book in hand as she looked around the table.

Yua listed off her feast as Tsukishima leaned over your shoulder to look at the menu still in your hand.

“Iced mango tea please.” He looked back at you as you shifted nervously in your seat.

“One iced americano please.” You attempted to hand the menu back to her, slightly leaning over Tsukishima as you looked at him to move over. He leaned back in his seat, a smirk pulling at the corner of his lips. You frowned, leaning further over his large frame to give the menu back.

A glass tipped over a few tables over, the patron cursing under their breath. “I’ll put these in for you.” The host nodded before excusing herself to help clean up the spilled drink.

You sat back in your seat, glaring at Tsukki as you scooted towards the window.

“I’m going to use the restroom, you two enjoy some alone time.” Yua wink, sliding out of the booth.

You watched her disappear behind the bathroom door before turning to Tsukki. “Thank you for coming today but you don’t need to be so…”

“Sweet?” Tsukki interrupted.

“Fake.” You corrected, “You weren't even this happy last night…”

“Sugawara-san told me to play the part.” He smiled, pinching at your cheek.

You pushed his hand away, “What else did he tell you?”

“A good amount, he's a chatty drunk.”

A younger man walked up to the table, drinks and treats in hand as he set each one down in front of you.

“Thank you.” Tsukki nodded before turning back to you.

“How chatty?” You questioned, the amused look painting it's way over his features told you enough.

“Excited for volleyball nationals? How about that English test last week? He says you got an A. But you forgot a few commas, you may want to pay attention to that.”

You let your head fall on the table as you groaned, “Did he tell everyone?”

“No, I was the only one who bothered to listen.” He lifted the tea filled glass to his lips, nodding towards Yua coming out of the bathroom.

Her eyes lit up as she sat back down, “This all looks so good, thank you Tsukki!”

His nose wrinkled at the informalities, “Of course.”

“How is it?” He turned towards you as you took a sip of your drink.

“It’s good.” You return his smile, looking over the tall boy's features for the first time that day.

He was in his own ways very handsome, his soft blond hair tousled, falling just below his eyes. The sun shined in just the right way on the sparse auburn highlights that framed the pieces, the lightest shade of strawberry blonde.

He gave you a quizzical look, eyes shining behind the thick rims of his glasses. They were golden, sparkling in the rays of soft yellow sunlight that tinted the entire cafe.

He reminded you of the golden hour, when the sun dipped just enough below to horizon to paint the world in golden yellows.

“You didn’t order anything to eat?” He waved the waitress over again, “You’ll get a stomach ache if you just drink coffee all day.” He nodded for you to order something else as she pulled out her book.

“Ah i’m fine really…” You contested, trying to excuse the waitress.

“Strawberry shortcake?” He looked at Yua as she nodded. “One strawberry shortcake please.”

“Tsukki you didn’t need to get me anything else.” You frowned as she disappeared to put in your order.

“Of course I did, I can’t have my love feeling sick all day.” Tsukki smoothed over your hair, his long fingers trailing down the side of your jaw to turn your flustered gaze towards him.

“T-tsukki!” You stammered pushing his hand away as he chuckled.His personality was killing all the admiration you had for him.

“Cute.” He beamed, before looking over his shoulder.

“Here you go.” The same young boy smiled as he set down your cake.

“Oh, thank you!” You bowed slightly as the boy took his leave.

“Once you finish we can go do anything you like.” Tsukishima pushed the plate towards you as his arm layed around the back of your seat.

“I know he's trying to be convincing but he could lay it on a little less thick.” You shifted slightly as his hand ghosted over your shoulder.

“This has to be some of the best cake i’ve ever had. Do you come here a lot Tsukki?” Yua asked through a mouth of coffee cake.

“Once or twice a week when I need a quiet place to study. This place is open 24 hours a day so it’s pretty nice late at night.”

“Wow, we don’t have anything like that. Maybe I should come here for college.” Yua proclaimed as you took a bite of cake.

“Yua do you think your grades are good enough?” You tease, pushing your foot against her own under the table as she pouted.

“How is your cake?” Tsukishima questions as you cut off another bite.

“It’s good, do you want some?” You slid the plate towards him, he is paying for it after all.

“Sure.” He smiles, leaning over you to take the bite off your fork.

Your froze, fork still in midair as you made eye contact with the shrewd man. The entertainment he got from your expectation was telling enough as to why he was doing this.

Yua’s phone buzzed on the table top suddenly, “Oh excuse me, i’ll meet you guys outside.”

She got up from the table, answering the call as she nodded a thank you to the host and walked out the door.

“Finish you cake.” Tsukishima nudged you, as he got up from the table. “I’m gonna go pay.”

You looked at your fork before setting it down, you hated him.

A few moments later Tsukki came back, sliding in beside you.

You pushed the last bite of cake toward him, frowning at the still apparent smirk on his face.

“Oh don’t be so upset, I was only teasing.” He shook his head as he took the last bite. “Flustering you was a bonus, I only wanted to see if I could agitate him more.”

You looked at the blond confused, “Who?”

“You mean you didn’t know he was coming today?” It was now his turn as his brows knitted together. He snorted, covering his mouth to stifle the laughs.

You shook your head slowly, it just wasn’t clicking. Tsukki sighed and nodded for you to look behind him.

Sitting up slightly you looked at the hat clad man sitting alone by the bathroom door, phone in hand as he flipped through an app. He turned around slightly, hazel eyes meeting your own as he looked back down at his lap.

“What is that idiot doing?” You questioned, leaning over to get a better look at your boyfriend sinking into his oversized jacket.

“Hiding.” Tsukki jokes, his finger tapping on the phone laying on the table before you.

You unlock it, dialing Sugawara. Both of your eyes glued on the incognito man.

He’s phone vibrated, startling him as he jumped in his seat before quickly ignoring the call.

Tsukishima shook his head, before slipping out of the booth. “Let's give him his privacy.”

You nod, picking up your phone to end the call. The notification screen popping back up as you notice another missed call.

“One missed call from :Tooru (#1 Senpai) Oikawa”

“When did he call?” You question, redialing his number for the second time that day. You slid out of the booth, following Tsukishima out of the cafe as the phone rang.

No answer.

You listen to his voicemail, giving Yua a small smile as she looks over at you.

“Sorry I missed you again. Just call me when you get this, or text me...I hope you're having a good day senpai.” You ended the call before walking over to your friends.

“Was the Oikawa-senpai?” Yua questioned as she looked over your face.

“Yeah. He called me this morning too but didn’t leave a message that time either.” You thought back to the late night call you had gotten from him before, it wasn’t unlike him to randomly call you. But never that late and never without a message.

“Do you want to keep trying him?” Tsukki was no stranger to Oikawa or his strange ways, but he could tell from the look on your face that whatever had been bothering you wasn’t a new issue.

“No, it’s ok. I don’t want to keep you guys waiting.” You wave them off, turning up the volume on your phone before putting it back in your pocket.

“Ok.” Tsukki gives you a strange look, his golden eyes unreadable.

“Well what do you guys want to go do?” Yua beams, leaning between the both of you.

“Tsukishima you live over here, is there anything you want to do?” You smile, his eyes softening.

“Not really.” He shrugs.

Yua points to the banner peeking out between the trees of the park, “That looks fun.”

You shift over to see the words boldly written across the white fabric, “New dinosaur exhibit from the United States”

You mouth the words, eyes lighting up at you turned towards and equally bright eyed Tsukki.

He coughed, turning around to hide the growing blush crossing his cheeks as you took a step back.

“We can go if you want Tsukki.”

“I don’t care, whatever you want.” He cleared his throat, avoiding your curious gaze.

“Cute.” You teased, as he pushed you away from him.

“Lets just go.” He grumbles, walking ahead of you.

---

“Wow Tsukki look!” You beamed, pulling him over to another fossilized skeleton of some long dead lizard. “I think this one kinda looks like you.” You teased, pointing to the long neck.

“Think we're distant cousins?” He smiled, stretching his neck out.

You laughed, covering your mouth as groups walking by starred.

“Only if F/N is related to that frilly looking one over there.” Yua added as Tsukishima chuckled.

You fixed your eyes on the familiar hat behind Tsukishima, tucked behind a pillar close to the museum exit. Sugawara had been following close behind the three of you all night, ducking behind exhibits each time you came close.

“I’m going to use the bathroom, i'll meet you both by the exit.” You excused yourself as the other two continued on the prehistoric tour.

You made your way around the opposite side of the pillar, Sugawara looking out the other way as he moved to follow your existing group. You snuck up behind him, looking around him as he scanned to check if it was clear to come out.

“Hi Koushi.” You smiled, looking up at the distracted man.

“Hi F/N.” He looked at you before turning back to the mission at hand, he couldn't let you get too far now could he?

“I like your hat, where did you get it?” You mused, this man was oblivious.

“A gift.” He answers your briefly before spinning around. “Hi!” He chuckles loudly, startled by how close you had gotten.

“What are you doing Koushi?” You tilt your head, an amused smile adoring your face.

“I wanted to make sure your date went well!.” He waved his hands in defense, taking a step back.

You wrapped your hands around his wrist, pulling him back behind the pillar. “And why would you need to do that?”

“Because drunk me worries a lot less than sober me…” He sighs in defeat, what use was it hiding from you. He couldn’t just sit at home while you were on a date with another guy, fake or not.

You groan, rolling your eyes, “ Koushi someone could see you.”

“Well tell Tsukki to stop touching you so much and I wouldn't need to be chaperoning this date.” He huffed in reply, folding his hands over his chest.

“He’s just trying to convince Yua.” You couldn’t help but smile, jealous Sugawara was your favorite.

“Yeah he’s trying something…” He looked away, cheeks growing red at your gaze.

“You're ridiculous, I have to go. Try not to let Yua see you ok?” You stood up on your tiptoes, pushing his hat up enough to press a quick kiss to his cheek before leaving.

He put a hand over the warm spot, throwing his head back as he groaned. He grumbled to himself as he walked off, he might as well try to beat you home at least.

---

“Hey sorry!” You looked between the two as they turned away from their conversation.

“Was it the coffee?” Yua frowned.

“I did tell you to eat.” Tsukki added, chuckling as you smack his arm.

“I hate you both.” You whined, Yua giggling.

“The train is gonna be at the station in about thirty minutes, I think we should head back.” Yua pointed to the clock in the center of the museum, nodding towards the sun setting just [ast the tree line.

“Wow, is it already seven?” You looked at her wide eyed as Tsukki nodded.

“We can cut through the park, the station is just on the other side.”

You followed him and Yua out of the museum, falling behind as you looked down at your illuminated phone.

“It’s Tooru, I'll catch up.” You waved them off as you lifted the phone to your ears.

---

Oikawa looked up at your door, taking a deep breath before shifting the bouquet of flowers to his other hand. He tapped on your door lightly before taking a step back.

Your lights were on in your bedroom, the soft yellow peeking out of the white curtains. He stood on his tiptoes as he watched for some kind of movement behind them.

His anxiety grew as he sank back down on the balls of his feet, nervously chewing on his lip as he reached to knock on your door one more time, this one a bit louder.

He had tried to call you, but for some reason most of them weren't going through. The few that did were never picked up.

He didn’t want to confess to you over a voicemail, and his nerves were too much to leave a coherent message on why he was calling you in the first place.

“Where are you?” He questioned, knocking again on the door. Readjusting the bouquet in his hands he straightened his back and watched the door again.

He knew you were off from practice today, only because he drove by the school three times to check. Were you asleep, working on homework, maybe you had taken a walk down to the corner store.

“Maybe I should call her again.” He frowned, moving the flowers into one hand as he pulled out his phone.

The seconds between each ring felt like eons, his heartbeat stopping all together when the next one didn’t come. His breath hitched once he heard your voice faint on the other end, talking to someone before speaking to him.

“I think that may have been the longest game of phone tag we’ve had in awhile.” You smiled, happy someone had finally gotten through.

“Yeah, it definitely might have been.” He returned your laugh as he looked out at the setting sun over the building tops. He relished the sound of your voice, leaning into the phone.

“What are you doing?”

“Oh nothing, just seeing what your doing tonight.” Oikawa kicked at the concrete step in front of him.

“On a date in Tokyo actually, why?” You look at Tsukki and Yua arguing over what way to go, shaking your head as Yua threw her hands up in defeat.

“Oh, well nevermind then. I was by your house today so I wanted to say hi.” His words caught in his throat, voice cracking.

“Oh, i’ll be back in a few hours…” You frowned, did he sound upset?

“It’s ok, I have to head back to Tokyo for training in the morning.”

“I'm sorry senpai, maybe next weekend?” You stopped walking, Yua waving for Tsukki to stay.

“Yeah, maybe. Get home safe F/N.”

“You too Senpai.” You try to add as the line dies.

He looked down at the bouquet in his hands, lavender and baby's breath peeking out over the opaque cellophane .

He had remembered you mentioning this exact arrangement one night with him. Sobbing into his chest as you cried about never finding a boyfriend, never having a wedding, never getting to have your dream bouquet of flowers.

He found it endearing and quite funny that you decided to confess this to him of all people, the man that of course planned on marrying you one day.

He had wanted to wait until you finished school to tell you of course, you were distracted enough as is. But Sugawara was reason enough to do it sooner rather than later.

He had fought with himself long enough over telling you his true feelings, hated himself for letting another boy break your heart. He couldn’t handle seeing you like that anymore.

So he decided today would be the day, he would confess to you before you and Sugawara got serious. He had planned an entire day but with the lack of communication on both sides now he was left with this. Standing in front of your door as the sun went down, praying that you would open the door before it got any colder outside.

He bit his lip, chuckling as the bouquet fell to his side. “Of course i’ve been trying to reach her all day while she's on a date.”

He looked at the vibrant flowers, his restrained laugh slowly turning into soft sobs. His grip on the stems tightening as he turned back towards his car.

He threw the flowers into the passenger seat before getting in. Turning on the car, he ripped the gear shift back into drive. He sat there a moment, looking at the road in the rearview mirror before easing back into park, foot still rutted into the brake pedal.The lull of the motor reverberated through the steering wheel as he rested his head on the cold leather.

A moment was all he needed, just a moment to be alone as he screamed. Cried out how badly he wanted you to be home, how suffocating it was loving you when you didn't even know, how long he had hated the dull throbbing in his chest everytime he thought of you.

But now his moment was over as he sat back up, rubbing the tears from his swollen eyes as he reversed the car out of your driveway.

---

“Everything ok?’ Yua questions, walking beside you.

“Maybe, Tooru was in town today and wanted to see me.” You looked up at the confused blond behind her.

“Is that a bad thing?” Tsukki tilted his head.

“I’m not sure.” You force a smile as you looked away from your dark phone. “Lets go, we don’t want to miss the train!” You push your friends along, their suspicions waning.

You approached the station with a few minutes for goodbye, eyes falling on each other as you waited for someone to speak first.

“Well i’ll leave you too for your first kiss.” Yua smiles, pushing you towards Tsukishima. “Bye bye Tsukki, it was great meeting you!” She gave him a brief bow before turning to walk away.

“She is so annoying.” You whine as she disappears down the station steps.

“She cares, I think it's...sweet.” Tsukki shakes his head at the bright blue bob looking around the corner at the two of you. “Get home safe, text me that you made it ok if you want.” Tsukishima placed both his hands on the side of your face, leaning in to place a soft kiss on the crown of your head. “I’m sure she’ll ask why if I didn’t.”

You smiled softly up at the blond, “Thank you Tsukki.”

He gave Yua a wave, her head ducking back behind the brick wall of the station as he said his finally goodbyes.

You met Yua as the train pulled in, her squeals pricking your eardrums. “I would have preferred one on the lips for how much I spent on these tickets but that was fine too.”

You rolled your eyes and took a seat besides her on the train. “Ok, ok. Shush before we get kicked off the train.” It was nice to see her happy, despite the deceptive reasonings behind it.

The train ride is spent in silence as you both doze off, you hadn’t been the only one up all night worrying.

As the train pulled in, Yua nudged you awake. Passengers grabbing bags as they departed. You followed behind, walking with her up to the street as you regained some form of coherence.

You gave your friend a wave goodbye ,before turning to leave .Her hand grabbed at the fabric of your sleeve, pulling you back.

“Hey wait can I talk to you really fast?”

“Sure.” It was seldom that you saw Yua timid, eyes avoiding your own as she worked up the courage she usually had.

“Well, F/N. I, well. I’m sorry for everything.” She looked up at you, frowning at your growing smile.

“Yua it's fine, I should have just told you.” You attempted to ease the tension.

“No, it’s not. I didn’t think you could take care of yourself or make these kinds of decisions so I butted into your personal life that you weren't ready to share.” She kicked at the air before taking a deep breath.

“F/N, I was a bad friend. Your mom told me when she left to look out for you and I took it too far. I could have really messed up our friendship.” Her lip quivered as she shook her head. “ I’m sorry, I won’t be your mom anymore!” Her voice was louder then intended as she tried her best to cover the faults in her voice.

You chuckled, placing a hand on your head. “Your stupid and I love you.”

She returned your smile, pushing you lightly. “Go home loser.”

You waved goodbye, walking in opposite directions as you each made your way home. The burden no longer heavy on your friend's chest.

You on the other hand had your own, phone heavy in your pocket.

“Maybe I should call Tooru again, he sounded upset.” You reflected as you walked home.

Something didn’t sit right with you, anxiety building every time you thought about that call.

You pulled out your phone, turning on the screen as you walked up the driveway to your house.

You looked up at the porch, lowering your phone back down.

“Hey you.” You smiled, Sugawara leaning back against the step.

“Hey.” He patted the space beside him, “Let's have a talk.”

You gave him a quizzical look, slowly sinking down beside him.

He looks up at you, his lips in a tight line.“You two are breaking up, I'm not allowing you to see Tsukki anymore.”

You shook your head before laying it against his chest. “That's fine, he thinks he knows more about dinosaurs then me anyways.”

“I’m glad that was the deal breaker.” Sugawara ran his hand down your back as he laid his head on top of yours.

You stayed this way for a while, looking out at the skyline of stars. Your eyes growing heavier as you listened to the soft thumping of the heart that seemed to beat in tandon to your own.

“You should head inside, we have class bright and early tomorrow.” Sugawara pulled you away from his chest, his hand tilting your sleepy gaze to meet his own.

You nodded as he got up. He offered you a hand, helping you up as he brushed the dirt off your pants legs. You walked with him down the stairs to his car, watching him get in. He rolled the window, leaning out to meet you.

“Goodnight.” He smiled, pulling you down to his level. He ghosted his lips over your own before kissing you softly.

“Goodnight.” You leaned your forehead against his before standing back up.

He gave you a small wave before pulling out of your driveway, the size increasing as he drove down the road.

You giggled, watching his car disappear around the corner before making your way back up the steps. As you unlocked your door you noticed a small bud of lilac sticking out from under your doormat, the light illuminating the vibrant sprig as you opened the door.

You leaned down to pick it up, “These don't grow here?” You examined the flower, tilting it over in your hand as the door closed behind you.

----

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---

[eveenstar]

𝑺𝒂𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏 𝑮𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒔 [𝑨 𝑳𝒐𝒌𝒊 𝑳𝒂𝒖𝒇𝒆𝒚𝒔𝒐𝒏 𝒙 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓 𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒇𝒊𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏]

||➸𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐈: 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐆𝐨𝐧𝐞||

Tags/Warnings: Mentions of death, angst, sadness, (Y/N) going a bit insane, a bit of spoilers but not much, happens three years after Infinity War. Also fem!reader, so it's easier for me to write, sorry guys!

Summary: It's been three years since Loki died, and two years since you isolated yourself from the outside. On a particular routine day, you receive a call from Natasha asking you to come by the Avengers Tower.

Note: First chapter of my new fanfic series, "Saturn Gardens"! Pardon me for any English mistakes, as you may know, it's not my native language :) Hope you enjoy!

Your fingers calmly slip through the book pages you're reading. The faint light that escapes through the clouds and into your bedroom provides enough light to see what you're reading. Not that it matters anyhow, your mind is somewhere else. Somewhere distant, old and familiar. Somewhere you wished to be right now.

Your lips met the cold glass of wine you've been drinking for the past twenty minutes, and your gaze drifts to the large landscape in front of your eyes. The sizeable windows made it possible to see almost of all the meadow and the trees in the background, some people would contemplate this beautiful view, but you thought it felt lonely. Empty. Voidless.

A soft and pale mist had fallen upon the land due to it being early hours in the morning. No birds were singing, no animal was in sight, just you and the current book that lays in your hand. You'd grown to enjoy silence, but this silence was restless.

Sighing, you stood up from your white chair and placed the glass of wine on the table. Dressing your Indigo blue robe, you made your way to the kitchen. This would be the second time you'd leave your bedroom since you woke up, first one was to get wine. What would your mother say to you, if she saw the horrible state you were in?

"You look like a widow, for fuck's sake (Y/N)!"

That's because you are one, indeed. Or were you wrong? You and Loki never married, even though you'd spoken about it a few times. This house, this stupiditly huge and modern mansion, was all that was left for you. Tony Stark offered it to you and the trickster God, according to him as a "offer of good will and peace" but it was honestly because your previous home burned down and you didn't have the money for another one. Tony, as the rich friend of the group, decided to be a gentle soul and get it for you.

You opened your fridge, which used to be filled with all kinds of food, but now there's barely enough for dinner. Your stomach is empty, it craves for food, but your heart is too heavy to think about it. Your feet felt chilly on the black mosaic floor tiles, and it reminded you that you aren't wearing any socks. You glance down to your feet, your mind drifting off once again and you lose track of the time you spent staring down.

The black tiles are ice cold and hurt your feet, they decor the floor of all house, minus the bathroom; in which the floor's tiles are white instead of black. Sometimes you get tired of the colour pattern; Black and white.

In the walls, in the floors, in the roof...Sometimes it was too much, sometimes it was too little. Maybe you should repaint them. Maybe you shouldn't.

Loki complained about them sometimes, he said they should be green and golden. You had no idea if he was being serious at the time. He never was much for decor, he said he wanted you to decor it at your taste; he'd love anything you love.

He was always like that.

He was.

He is like that

"What should I eat today, love?" You whispered to no-one. Your eyes shifted to the kitchen's balcony and stared at the Narcissus flowers on the small plant vase. Narcissus flowers are native to Europe, Asia and North Africa, there's more than 100 species of the plant and they were one of Loki's gifts to you. They are some of the first to bloom in the early spring, announcing the end of winter, which you found incredibly cute in a way. They came from the Greek word "Narke", which meant numbness, and ironically how you felt right now.

They also symbolize rebirth and new beginnings. Was this the Universe sending you a message? Telling you that it's finally time to move on?

You dragged your feet to the couch and drowned yourself on the pillows. Everything felt cold, no matter how many lays of clothing you'd wear, it felt cold nevertheless. Maybe it was coming from inside you, the emptiness had consumed you to the point nothing warm would take that effect away.

Your phone rang, and rang, and rang. You grunted and covered your head with a pillow, hoping to muffle out the annoying sound. But it didn't seem to stop no matter how much you tried.

So you finally answered it.

"(Y/N)?"

Natasha.

"(Y/N)? Can you hear me?"

Yes. I'm still here.

"(Y/N), could you please come by the Avengers tower? We need to talk, it's important."

Why?

"Please, " She pleaded, "Come meet me."

You looked at your phone for a while once silence remained. It seems neither you or Natasha knew what to say to each other. The silence remained for a long while that you even had doubts if she was still on the call.

"Do you want me to order something to your house? Are you in need of anything, (Y/N)?"

Yes.

"Do you know who you are?"

Yes.

"Do you know where you are?"

Yes.

"Do you want to keep living this way?"

A sudden sound woke you from your thoughts and startled you. Your eyes scammed the living room and saw there was no sign of threat, then you took a glimpse of your phone's screen.

Natasha - Call ended 10 minutes ago

Great, you were hearing voices now. How quite. She did asked you to go by the Avengers Tower, didn't she? Maybe you should go. It's been almost three years since Loki died, and two years since you closed yourself from everyone and everything. It's been a while since you've stepped foot outside your house or your lands.

Again, you dragged your feet relutanctly to your bedroom and stared at the mirror. The reflection of yourself was sad, to say the least. How did you break down so easily? How did you allow yourself to break this way?

"Do you think I should go, Loki?" You asked in a whisper while staring at a empty spot of the room. Silence.

"You're right." A tiny smile formed on your lips, "As always."

Your body always worked in autopilot. Even if your mind was somewhere else, your body took a shower and grabbed the first outfit in hand. Your hands were cold, once in contact with your skin.

Wet and cold like an abandoned dog in a rainy street.

You frowned slightly at the thought and realized you were dressed, heavens know for how long. Did your mind wander off again? Great. It has been like this a long while, no matter how many pills or medication you took, you began to forget things. Names. Places. Memories. It's like your body wasn't your own anymore, just a robot moving in autopilot. You wrote down notes about your favourite memories with Loki, as you didn't want to forget them. You missed his (surprisingly) warm hands, his deep grey eyes, or his charming smile. You missed running your hands through his hair while you both layed in front of the fireplace, books in hand.

You grabbed a framed picture of the Avengers together and noticed a strange detail. Your face was blurred out. You blinked once and twice, but it didn't go away. Was it always like this? Maybe it was and you forgot. Maybe a photo error, or it's simply dirty. Just that.

Placing the picture down, you stared again at a empty spot of the bedroom, "I'll be back soon, my love."

Your steps felt heavy on the floor, like no matter how much you'd walk, the exit door seemed to be distancing itself. By the time your hands grabbed the door knob, you were out of breath. I-just-ran-a-marathon out of breath.

The wind outside was refreshing, in a way. It felt different, lighter even. You closed your eyes to feel the breeze blow through you, just for a single moment. Then you heard a bird sing, just on top of the tree in front of your house. You weakly smiled and waved at it, then you entered your car.

The trip to the Avengers Tower was quiet and peacefully calm. Leaving your house, you didn't notice the dark silhouette standing on the living room's window, watching you from afar or the strange amount of ravens taking shelther in the same tree of the singing bird.