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#glad i don’t have to do it again for 8 months
lazylittledragon · 5 months
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got my first ever mild chemical burn but looking like a cupcake was worth it
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lilgynt · 10 months
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#personal#my mom told me yesterday my brothers paying to have my door replaced today or tomorrow bc he misses me and thinks is affecting our#relationship badly#and she wasn’t supposed to tell me but i’m glad she did cause like#she tried saying she’s getting it replaced immediately grilled her on where the fuck she got that money since i know we have more important#issues and she IMMEDIATELY snitched#anyway i feel complicated. thank you for the door. that you already said you would do. what was the point of all of this#and i’m re reading the messsges maybe i was too mean but also 8 months no door and everyone being mean to me about it#he told my mom he misses me and she said how sweet it was to hear that and i should consider just. letting this go#and she doesn’t want to minimize the door or what it represents beyond just the door#but didn’t really get it when i was like it matters if he’s doing this bc he misses me or bc he thinks he did anything wrong#like he can do both but. i just want to know he’s not thinking i’m some brat for asking for something? normal? or that this won’t happen#again cause this always happens.#she was like isn’t it more romantic that he misses you so much he doesn’t care if he’s right or wrong? girl what the fuck are you on#anyway i feel weird bc like. it’s nice but i didn’t need him to shell this out#and i feel oddly like a brat to get this expressed done from when i said im upset with him#like 20 days later but feels fast. and i wish he could have reached out and talked to me#but also i’ve been so angry and resentful i don’t know if i’d want to talk especially if it’s just the same convo over and over#i don’t need grand gestures i just wish this stuff wouldn’t happen in the first place#and i’m worried that after the door my mom will get upset if i’m still upset with my brother after#and i’m not sure how he thinks we’re gonna get back to talking if i can’t acknowledge he got the door.#like can’t be like hey thanks! also we need to talk about how you use money instead of ur words.#like in this case i genuinely really needed the door but also it’s just hard to be like hey you did this thing that was unacceptable#also thanks for the full tank of gas dinner and 100 bucks. unprompted. anyway it’s unacceptable-#like it sounds stupid right? anyway i don’t know if he’ll tell me or just try to slide back into talking without ever talking about it#i don’t know and i feel like an asshole no matter what route i go#but will say funny i hid that he broke it from him and he’s hiding that he’s fixing it for me something something#i just feel weird about it. i miss him but also don’t miss getting shit from him or the other one lately i’m just#honestly doing my own thing and just getting through the day or enjoying it too much to think about him sometimes#but i do miss him and i don’t want to be constantly fighting or arguing with my family. it’s not a nice feeling.
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stevenose · 24 days
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don’t delete the kisses - part 8/?
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a camboy!steve au
this installment contains: more smut!! more bonding!! more cute shit!!; camboy!steve; reader with a vagina; ‘princess’ is used in reference to reader once; oral (reader receiving); slight bit of orgasm denial; steve tryna be a s*gar d*ddy; caring steve <3 like steve literally getting off on taking care of u 🫶🏻
though this is written as part of a series, it can be read as a standalone fic!
author’s note: we back gang 🫶🏻 i hope you enjoy this installment! i have a lot more ideas now of where i can take this au so excited to continue it :) and hopefully i will update it before 10 more months pass lmao
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You assume, based on the way light filters in through your curtains, that it’s a little after 6 am.
And Steve’s still here.
He’s curled up into your side. Hotter than a radiator but you never move away from him. Not even when you’re sweating from the proximity - of being near him, of holding him when he’s sleeping, vulnerable.
You can still feel the ache he left between your thighs.
You’d stayed up for a while just talking. Admiring. It wasn’t supposed to be a sleepover. But when Steve fell asleep halfway through talking about winning his senior year basketball championship, you couldn’t possibly find it in your heart to wake him up. And at some point in the night his lonely fingers found your side and they haven’t left since.
Robin was right. He does snore.
You’re too wound up to fall back asleep. It feels like something life changing just happened and you’re not sure how to feel about it. What’s he going to say when he wakes up? What if he regrets it? And that cold, terrified grip holds on to your chest, heartbeat quickening.
Steve moans a little behind you. Not like how he sounded last night. It’s innocent, tired, small. His arm pulls you in tighter and then he props himself up to stare at the side of your face.
You look over your shoulder at his messy hair, the little bit of scruff that grew in over his top lip overnight.
“You’re so pretty,” he sighs, laying back down, pulling you in even closer. He kisses the junction of your shoulder and neck sweetly, his thumb rubbing back and forth against your ribcage.
You have to swallow an elated squeal.
“Why’re you up?” his voice is deep, hoarse.
You smile, pushing back into him. “You were snoring.”
He tickles you - well, tries to with his sleepy hands. “I don’t snore.”
“Okay.”
Steve giggles - a sound you’ve never heard in your life, one you’d like to cherish forever - and tucks his chin over your shoulder. “You okay?”
You melt into his touch. Sweat beads at your hairline but you don’t mind. “Mhm.”
He sounds a little more concerned when he asks, “You sure?”
“I promise.” You find his hand under the cover and lace your fingers through his. “I’m glad you’re here.”
He sighs, relieved. “Me, too.”
You’re almost positive he’s fallen back to sleep. His breaths even, get a little shallow. But then he talks again. “Can y’sleep?”
“Think I might just be awake,” you whisper. “But you can keep sleeping.”
“I’m up.”
You hum. “I’m not convinced.”
He rolls you over until you’re on your back, then props himself up above you. One hand finds your cheek and his sleepy eyes search yours for just a moment before he kisses you.
You have never cared less about morning breath.
It’s like he’s touching you for the first time again. All tender and reserved. His thumb swipes across your hot cheekbone and he presses his nose against yours when he pulls back. “Could a sleepy guy do that?”
You’re left a little speechless. You wish you had something funny and clever to say but you’re simply just enamored staring up at his soft face.
Steve looks like he’s thinking for a second, then says, “I can do more, you know.”
“I’m very aware.”
“You want somethin’?” His hand moves down your torso and rests at your hipbone, giving it a little squeeze. “You did all the work last night.”
You feel just as you did last night - excited, scared, sick, overjoyed, ache-y. “That’s not true,” you breathe.
Steve shrugs a shoulder. “Well, I don’t mind doing the work.”
You’re entranced. His thumb rubs soothing circles into your hips and he waits for you to say something, looking shy himself. You lick your lips subconsciously. “I don’t mind you doing the work, either.”
He grins and you feel so stupid. But he doesn’t give you a single moment to think of something better to say.
“You’re so beautiful,” he says softly. “I’d do anything for you. Anything you wanted.”
You nod dumbly.
He smiles a little, raising a brow slightly. “What do you want right now, sweetheart?”
You’re looking at his lips and yeah, you want those. You want those in so many places. And that tongue - a ribbon of arousal tightens in your stomach. “I want you.”
“I know you can do better than that,” he coos, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “You want what?”
You can’t speak, so you reach up and tap his lips with your fingers. Your face heats up when he kisses them. “You want my mouth?”
You nod. “Please?”
He kisses them again. “Where do you want it?”
You swallow hard and spread your legs. Last night was intense but this is something else. It’s six in the morning for Christ’s sake. And he looks like he just walked out of a porn shoot.
“Down here?” he asks, finally tucking his thumb into the waistband of your underwear. “Need my mouth on this pretty pussy?”
“Please?” you repeat. You can hardly hear yourself.
Your fingers slide away from his lips as he moves down the bed, throwing the covers to the side for a good look at you. You just about die at the sight of him, hair messy and still so perfect, naked shoulders broad, biceps flexing as he props himself up. “Help me out, huh, baby?”
You lift your hips for him to slide your underwear off. He places them neatly beside you on the bed, pats them twice with a wink. Whatever that means. You laugh, taking a moment to soak in the boy below you with his charm and gleaming eyes and freckles.
And then he parts your legs.
Your breaths hitch at the same time.
The air is cold on your center and you know you’re soaked. Embarrassingly so. But Steve is either indifferent or very much into it, because he says nothing, chestnut eyes trained on your core.
“This okay?” he asks, tearing his eyes away and blinking up at your face.
You nod vigorously. “Yeah, Steve.”
He turns his head to the side to kiss the inside of your thigh. It tickles. “Can you tell me what you want, please?”
You swallow hard, hands finding purchase on the sheets beneath you. “I want you to eat me out, Steve.”
He smiles softly and kisses up your thighs slowly. Occasionally he’ll press open-mouthed kisses to the skin, watching you squirm while he slots himself between them. “Want to know a secret?”
You want to know them all. Every last one. “Mhm.”
“I’ve cum thinking about having you like this before.” Another open-mouthed kiss. “All to myself.” Another. “Tasting how sweet you are, feeling you cum on my tongue.”
You’re more than breathless.
“Thought about it when recording. Had to grit my teeth to not moan your name.”
You listen attentively, burning up.
“And I thought about it at work sometimes,” he admits sheepishly. “About bending you over… eating you out behind the counter… and then I’d come home, set up my camera, and jerk off to it.”
You’re panting by now, his soft lips inching closer and closer to where you need him. You must be making a mess on your bed.
“So, if you think you’re a perv….”
He takes a moment to suck a hickey into your thigh and you finally whine, worked up to a boiling point.
“I thought about - about it, too.”
“Yeah?” Steve sounds hopeful. He readjusts himself below you. Wraps his arms around the backs of your thighs, planting you in place.
It feels a little bit like you’re on a rollercoaster, waiting for the drop.
“I’ve thought about everything with you.”
Inexplicably, Steve’s eyes both brighten and darken at once.
“I’ll give everything to you.”
It’s the most romantic goddamn thing anyone’s ever said to you, and a second later he’s eating your cunt like it’s his last meal.
“Oh -!” you gasp, hips jerking up. His strong arms hold you in place, keeps you still while he licks slowly up and down your folds. His tongue, hot and wet and thick, soothes the ache where he worked you open last night. Your head sinks into your pillow, unfocused eyes staring up at the pale blue light on your ceiling. “Oh …!”
“Mhm,” he hums, licks so slow it almost kills you. Your clit throbs, hole clenching, desperate for his affections again. He pulls away, just for a moment, chin already slick and eyes the color of coffee. “You taste so good.”
Steve’s lips wrap around your folds and he sucks. You gasp and arch your back but Steve pins you down again. He isn’t keen on letting you get away from the worship you deserve. He pulls back to look at you again, at your glistening cunt and pleasure-dazed eyes. “Oh, sweetheart. Hold on.”
And his hands reach upwards from where they’re tucked under you. You reach for them, letting your hands interlace again. They lock into place and he squeezes sympathetically, like he knows he’s about to ruin you.
He doesn’t pull any punches when he resumes. The tip of his tongue traces tight circles into your clit and you writhe again, back twisting, whining out for him. He moves slow and methodically and you wish he would just finish you off. It’s almost torturous how gingerly he moves, even if there’s a good reason for it.
Steve doesn’t want to just make you feel good. He wants to devour you. He wants to dedicate the feeling of you, the taste of you, the sounds of your pleasure, all to memory.
And then he purses his lips and sucks on your clit.
You’re so far gone. Eyes rolling back, legs tightening around his face. “Oh my god Steeeeeeve!”
He giggles, but doesn’t stop. Keeps his lips wrapped tight around you, keeps sucking. It makes a perverse noise, so dirty that it makes your stomach flip. Your eyes roll back painfully and just when it’s about to be too much he finally unlatches himself and soothes your swollen clit with a broad stroke of his tongue. He dips down, pushing his face into you to taper his tongue into your hole.
“Oh my god, oh my god, fuck….”
The tip of his nose rubs against your clit steadily while he tastes you. “So gorgeous,” he purrs, his breath fanning against your cunt. “You ever taste yourself?”
“God - no -“
Steve sighs like it’s a pity, then goes back to work. He moves where you need him, just as you need it, like he’s a mind reader. You twist and writhe in his grip before finally getting loose from his hands. They’re clammy as you reach for his hair, tugging just how he likes, and he quite literally growls as his efforts increase tenfold.
Little unhs are torn from your throat. Your eyes roll back and forth, hooded when you finally get the courage to steal a glance at him. His highlighted hair tangled up in your fingers, his back rippling, the veins on his hands popping just a bit as he pins you down. He’s grinding his hips, too, and you moan over that - he loves eating you out so much he’s trying to get off on it.
Your heartbeat hammers in your ears.
“Fingers,” you choke out, tugging on his locs. “Fingers, please Steve?”
“Yeah?” He pulls back, your grip loosening, and he lines his middle finger up with you. “You’re such an angel, know that? Always sayin’ please.”
His fingertip teasing you is driving you to insanity. You swallow hard. “Let’s talk about it another time.”
He laughs again, white teeth gleaning. “What’s wrong? Pussy’s so empty, huh?”
You nod. “Please, I’ll do anything for it.”
His smile turns a little evil. “Okay. Then here’s what’s going to happen.”
He slides his finger into you and you gasp. The pad of it settles right against your sweet spot. He crooks his finger just right and you moan loudly, needily, grinding your hips down.
Steve looks up at you with a little bit of awe and a lot of determination. “I’m going to pay for your rent ‘til you find another job.”
“But -“
Crooks his finger again, makes you cut yourself off with another moan. His other hand moves to your clit, rubbing slow circles into it.
“Mhm, and I’ll get your groceries, too, and I’ll pay for our dates. Treat you like a princess because it’s what you deserve.”
“You can’t,” you reply hoarsely.
“Let me,” he breathes, “or I won’t let you cum.”
Your hands twist hard into your bedsheets. Steve’s fingers move slow, enough to keep your mind hazy, unable to think straight.
“Not fair,” you whimper.
“It’s not fair you lost your job,” he coos sympathetically.
You shake your head. “Not - not fair you’re h-helping.”
“I want to give you the world.” His eyes are soft, his fingers moving faster, calculated. “Let me.”
Your legs shake around his shoulders. “I - but I -“
His mouth replaces the thumb on your clit and you’re gone again. Nothing but a little toy for him to play with. Mind blank, focused on nothing but the coil in your stomach, his tongue swiping across your nub, his lips sucking, his finger curling.
“Fuck.” It’s all you can say.
“Let me,” he moans against your skin, panting a little. “Let me take care of you.”
“Steve, Steve, Steve, Steve….”
“Say yes.” His voice is rough, hoarse. “Say yes or you won’t cum, baby, ‘nd I wanna see it, wanna see you cum again, please angel.”
Your mouth drops, pleasure and shame heightening in your stomach. You shouldn’t let him. But you want taken care of. And if he’s begging for you to let him, why wouldn’t you?
And, anyway, you really need to cum.
So you nod, mouth dropping open as your high comes to a head. “Y- yes!”
If you could open your eyes, you’d see how happy Steve is. “Yeah? Gonna let me?”
You nod again. “Shit, Steve!”
“Yeah, honey,” he grits, lips still tickling your clit, his finger working your sweet spot, his dick grinding into your bed. “So goddamn pretty, let me taste you when you cum.”
His breath is loud when his mouth engulfs your pussy again. You gasp and reach for his hair, fisting it like it’ll keep you tethered to reality. Your body goes stiff as you cum, clenching down on his finger so hard you’re both not sure how it doesn’t break. Steve groans lowly, tongue and lips still unwavering, sucking your clit into ecstasy.
You feel so good, so taken care of, that you cry, hot tears spilling down your face as you squeeze your eyes shut. Bliss washes over you swiftly and leaves you warm and relaxed in his wake. It seems to last forever. You’re breathless and dizzy by the time you’ve calmed down, body going slack again.
Steve finally pulls himself away from you. A thick string of saliva connects you together. You moan at his flushed, wet cheeks.
“You’re so good at that,” you pant.
He grins, pushes his hair back out of his face before crawling up towards you. He’s quick to grab your chin and press a kiss to your lips. You taste yourself for the first time ever. And it’s hot, for no reason. Steve licks into your mouth with it before pulling back.
“You like how that tastes?” he asks, playing with your bottom lip.
You look at him wide-eyed. “Uh-huh.”
“Me, too. Know how much I love it?”
You shake your head.
“I just came in my boxers.”
You gasp, elated. “You mean it?”
He scrunches his nose. “It’s really not that hot.”
“Are you kidding?” you whisper, reaching up for his face. “That’s so goddamn hot, Steve.”
He groans, as if you’re kidding him, and rolls off to lay beside you. You’re quick to stare at his crotch, mouth dropping at the stain spreading over the cotton. He pulls you into his chest before you can properly admire it, and bumps his nose against yours.
“You’re gonna let me, right?”
Your brows furrow. “Cum in your pants?”
“No! I mean about taking care of you.”
“Oh.” You almost forgot about all that. “It’s - you’re so nice, Steve, but my rent’s hundreds of dollars -“
“Okay?”
You narrow your eyes slightly. “Alright, don’t brag.”
“It’s only fair. I owe you, remember? Since you paid for my porn?”
Like you could forget.
“And in some ways, you’re like a business partner.”
“How?”
He kisses the tip of your nose. “I can assure you I’ve cum to the thought of you in at least half of my videos.”
If it were anyone else, you’d be disgusted, but it’s Steve. Dorky Steve who’s holding you like you’re precious right now, who just sucked your brain out of your clit. You’re a little flattered, in fact.
“You said yes before,” he reminds you.
“I can take it back.”
He furrows his brows, frowns, hums like he’s thinking. “Mmm, don’t think so.”
“Well, I already came, so….”
“Angel,” he sighs, rolling you into your back, crowding back on top of you. His cock is still half hard against your core. “I can always make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
You lick your lips, heart beating so fast it feels like it’s skipping. “Oh, yeah? Don’t think you’d last.”
He smiles and kisses your forehead. “You’re right. I wouldn’t.”
But he still leaves you a stack of hundreds on your bedside table when he’s about to go, refuses to take it back when you try shoving it into his hands.
“Just ‘til you get another job,” he says softly, holding your wrists gently in his hands, the hundreds curled up in your fist. “Let me help ‘til then, okay?”
“Fine,” you whisper, still feeling ashamed.
You both have an idea for another job in mind, but neither of you say anything.
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here2bbtstrash · 2 years
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the shape of your body (explicit)
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genre: fluffy slowburn smut
pairing: jimin x reader
summary: the same day you finally manage to speak to your months-long public transit crush, you end up seeing much more of him than you bargained for.
word count: 24k 🙇‍♀️
contains: explicit sexual content~*~ (after a slow burn lmao) - new york city grad school AU, strangers to lovers, reader is an art student, public transit thirsting, jimin is a dancer and a nude model, namgi and vhope as side characters, basically everyone is gay (they're ART STUDENTS in NEW YORK CITY it's called realism 💅), a smidge of member x member side character relationships, jimin is biromantic demisexual 👀, conversations about body image issues/past relationship struggles/demisexuality and libido, soooo much making out, a couple "failed attempts" at sex, accidental voyeurism (but not how you think lmao YOU'LL SEE), showering together non-sexually, and: fingering, clit stim, nipple play, come eating/sharing 🤭 an attempted blowjob, face sitting, & protected sex (multiple rounds 🥵)
A/N: asjdshgkdfjgs i can't believe it's done 😭 there were so many times i thought i would never finish this fic !!! i have too many friends to thank for talking me off of SEVERAL ledges where i was convinced this whole thing was trash and that i should just stick to short porn or perhaps simply never write again. i'm so glad i saw this one through because there are concepts in here that are deeply important and personal to me wehhh 🫠 i sincerely hope y'all enjoy this one!! thank u for enduring mostly radio silence while i was in jimin lockdown, and of course, happy early birthday to mini, the light of my mf life 🥰💜 (oh and LDOMLT ch 8 is coming next so buckle tf up bitches 👀)
an eternity of smooches to @haliiimede for beta reading and just generally being the best fucking person on planet earth ✨ AND TO @goodsoop FOR THE DEMI SENSITIVITY READ VERY SORRY THAT I AM THE WORLD'S LARGEST IDIOT AND FORGOT TO CREDIT..... i love you both 🥺
read on AO3!
~*~
You’ve taken the subway thousands of times since moving to New York.
Morning rides, squeezed nearly to death between commuters in suits blinking back sleep and school-uniformed kids scream-laughing and paper coffee cups gripped tight by winter-numb fingers.
Long trips with your sketchbook on your lap, riding the line all the way to Pelham Bay Park and back, to surface above ground out where there’s a little more space to breathe, until the setting sun floods orange glow between the buildings just before you descend again.
Late nights coming home, Namjoon’s head thudding back against the train window behind him as he dozes off, one arm thrown around your shoulder to ward off any drunk creeps, his free hand interlaced with Yoongi’s on his other side.
It’s always been the three of you, first in friendship, and now that the two of them have figured out they’re something more, you don’t mind it. But when it’s late and you’ve had enough drinks to feel warm all the way through, to melt something open inside of you, and you glance over to see a loving flicker of eyelashes exchanged as Namjoon leans down and presses a kiss to Yoongi’s temple, you can’t help it.
There’s a little bit of an ache there, right behind your ribs. Sometimes.
But mostly, when it comes to the train, you take the 6 to school. You go through the motions this morning the same as you always do: headphones around your neck, bag slung over your shoulder, immediately dropping into the first empty seat you see as the train doors shudder closed and the car starts to move. Six stops down, 51st street to Astor Place, five days a week, you know it like a heartbeat.
You just wish you knew him, too.
Subway Boy, as Yoongi affectionately labeled him the time you got two pitchers of margaritas deep and made the mistake of confessing to your roommates about your crush— if it can even be called that. Can you truly have a crush on someone you know nothing about, not even their name?
Well, you know a few things.
He must live further north than you, because on the days you see him, he’s already on the train when you board at 51st.
He must like music, because he always has a set of fancy bluetooth earbuds in.
You’re pretty sure he’s an athlete of some sort, because he’s usually carrying a gym bag—and because during this summer’s heat wave, the one and only time you’ve seen him wear shorts, you nearly fainted at the thick, defined muscles of his thighs.
He has an affinity for jewelry, delicate silver always glinting through the multiple piercings in his ears. At odds with this, he seems to prefer to dress comfortably, and you’ve seen him in enough branded school t-shirts and sweats to figure he must also be an NYU student, though you can’t say for sure if he’s undergrad or graduate.
You deeply hope you’re not crushing on someone who still needs a fake ID to drink, but there’s no way to be certain.
Most importantly, you know that he is absolutely stunning. Elegantly handsome, with expressive deep brown eyes, skin like glass, and round cheeks and full lips that flush frozen pink on particularly frigid New York days. His hair has changed colors a few times over the months that have passed since you first took notice of him, but it’s currently a honey blonde, and long enough that he often reaches up to card a hand through it. He does it now, pushing loose strands back to expose his forehead as he frowns down at his phone.
On days where you share the same car, you notice very little else that happens on the ride, thoroughly entranced in Subway Boy’s beauty and his mystery. The train could probably catch fire and you’d miss it entirely.
Today happens to be one of those days, and excitement glitters in your bloodstream as you realize he’s seated across from you. The rush of seeing him always feels like its own reward, some kind of cosmic sign that the day is going to be a good one.
And then the train stops moving.
There’s an audible reaction from a few people in the car, and you glance up a moment later when a voice buzzes over the intercom. You’re able to make out “attention passengers” and very little after that, just the basics about some sort of unforeseen interruption of service and that the train should resume moving again soon.
You sigh, knowing very well that the MTA’s definition of ‘soon’ does not often align with typical human expectations. Figuring you’ve got some time to kill, you reach into your bag to retrieve your sketchbook and the first pencil you can dig out of the bottom.
“What did they say?” A voice, quiet and deep, surprises you before you can even flip to your in-progress page.
You glance up to find Subway Boy staring at you, forearms braced on his knees as he leans forward into the gap between his seat and yours. He’s got one bluetooth earbud pinched between his fingertips and a confused look on his face, having clearly missed the announcement.
Heat floods your face at the feeling of his eyes fixed on you, and it takes you a second to form a response. “Uh— I didn’t get most of it. Something about unforeseen interruption. And that we’ll be moving again soon.”
A muscle works in his jaw as he rolls his eyes. “Typical.”
“I don’t think they know what ‘soon’ means,” you murmur, mostly to yourself as you tear your gaze away from Subway Boy and return to the sketchbook in your lap, rifling through to find your latest half-finished drawing. When you hear him huff a laugh, you have to bite down on the hopeful smile that threatens to shine across your face.
“Definitely not.”
You force yourself to keep your eyes on the page, assuming Subway Boy must go back to his music when he falls silent after his last comment.
With featherlight flicks of your pencil, you start to add a little depth to the quick study you were working on last night, Yoongi’s half-peeled tangerine that he left abandoned on the coffee table when he stepped out onto the fire escape for a smoke.
Subway Boy’s voice catches you off guard a second time. “Are you drawing?”
You bite down on your lip again, a nervous habit, and you nod as you tilt the page so he can see from across the car.
“Wow.” You wonder if you’re imagining the way his voice seems to soften a little. “You’re really good. Are you an artist?”
You can’t help it— your gaze flits up to meet his again. It’s nearly overwhelming to lock eyes with your Subway Boy and hear him compliment you, like something out of a wild daydream. “I guess so,” you remark, the corner of your mouth tugging up into a small smile as you say it. “I’ve certainly paid NYU enough money in my attempts to become one.”
“Know the feeling,” he scoffs, but his eyes smile back, pulled into crescent moons.
“What did you pay them for?”
“Currently, a dual MFA/MA in dance and… teaching dance. Really went all-in on the dancer thing.”
“Oh.” Your eyes widen automatically. You’ve wondered— and yes, occasionally drunkenly speculated with your roommates— what Subway Boy’s line of work might be, but you have no idea why dancer never occurred to you. Because now all the pieces suddenly fall together in front of you: the toned muscles that flex beneath the sleeves of his t-shirt, the natural grace he exudes, not to mention his perfect posture.
Of course he’s a dancer. It makes perfect sense.
It occurs to you, a beat too late, that a wide-eyed ‘oh’ is not the most normal response to a truly innocuous answer to a question asked of a random stranger.
But the smile in his eyes doesn’t falter. “I feel like I see you on this train a lot.”
Your stomach flutters like butterfly wings, and you have to look away, back down to the safety of your sketchbook. “Really?”
There’s an extra pause before he speaks again. “Man, sorry. Think I misread that. Now I feel creepy. I promise I’ve only noticed you a normal amount.” Your eyes snap back up to find him wincing slightly, one hand rubbing at the back of his neck.
“No, no, I’m— it’s not—” you stammer, trying to recover. “I, uh— me too, I have too. Noticed you. A normal amount. I… I don’t know why I just pretended like I didn’t.”
Subway Boy leans forward, head dropping down with a genuine laugh that shakes his shoulders, and you can’t help but laugh too, out of sheer embarrassment. He’s beaming when he rights himself again, and it sends a thrill buzzing through you, all the way down to your fingertips still clutched tight to your pencil.
“That makes me feel better,” he admits. “At least we’re both creepy.”
As if the universe itself is intervening to save you from any further humiliation, the train shudders back to life and begins to move again. The sigh you breathe is a strange mixture of relief and disappointment.
“That’s definitely a new record,” you say shyly as you move to shove your things back in your bag. “Maybe the MTA actually looked up what ‘soon’ means.”
His focus is tracked over your shoulder when you look up again, and his eyes dance left to right to chase the patterns in the subway tile as you pull into the next station.
“Guess it’s a miracle,” he says softly, not making eye contact.
“Must be,” you murmur back, letting your gaze drop to the floor, unable to hide your smile now.
He doesn’t say anything else, and neither do you, but the warm flush stays in your face for the rest of the ride. When the train pulls into the Astor Place station, you and Subway Boy get to your feet simultaneously, so quickly that your bags knock together as you pull them over your shoulders.
“Sorry,” you say in unison, immediately sharing an exhaled laugh at the synchronicity of the moment.
The doors slide open and he gestures for you to go first before following after. It’s a surprise— he’s never gotten off at Astor before, and when he doesn’t take the option of heading in another direction but instead falls into lockstep next to you, you seize the opportunity.
“Astor Place today, huh?” You hope the observation still falls into the category of ‘noticing a normal amount’.
“Yeah, first day of a new gig. What about you? Class?”
You nod. “Pretty standard stuff. But we start a new unit today, so that’s fun.”
“You in grad school too?”
“Yup, MFA in studio art.” You can’t help but tease, just a little. “Only one master’s degree for me, I’m such a slacker.”
His eyes squint again as he smiles. “Hey, I’m just glad you’re not, like, eighteen.”
“I thought that too!” You keep talking before you can stop yourself. “I mean, when I was… noticing. I distinctly remember thinking, like, please let me not be thirsting over a straight-up child right now.”
“Ahh...” Subway Boy trails off, and you can see a faint pink starting to blossom in the apples of his cheeks. “You were thirsting?”
You can’t help but scrunch your nose up slightly, resisting the urge to full-body cringe at your own stupid mouth. “We are now officially both creepy.”
He fidgets a little with the strap of the dance bag slung over his shoulder. “Hopefully I’m living up to the hype.”
You’re grateful to reach the art building before you can dig your grave any deeper. You nod your head in the direction of the glass doors as you slow to a stop, and he does, too. “This is me.”
“It’s actually me, too,” he remarks, glancing up at the building as if to double-check. “But I have a little bit, so I’m gonna grab a coffee I think. But it was nice to finally talk to you. Not that— sorry, that was weird. Take out the finally. It was good to talk. Meet a fellow starving artist and all.”
You worry your bottom lip between your teeth for a moment, until you finally work up the courage to ask the question. “Do you have a name?”
“Oh!” His eyes widen, more heat-blush coloring his face. “Yeah. Park Jimin. Probably could’ve led with that.”
You give him your name, and his voice is like music when he repeats it back.
“Well, good luck in class,” Jimin says with a nod. “And hopefully I’ll see you around sometime.” A smile toys at the corner of his mouth, and then he pauses as his words seem to catch up to him. “Well, I mean. I guess I know I will. On the— train— yeah, I’m gonna go before I say any more stupid things.”
“Bye Jimin,” you giggle, and he gives a shy departing wave before he spins on his heel. As he walks away, you can’t help but notice the way he drops his gaze and shakes his head, like he’s thoroughly embarrassed by his social performance.
And just like that, Subway Boy has a name— one that loops in your head as you float to class, barely feeling your feet touch the floor. Park Jimin. It’s sweet like him, warm sunshine in your veins as you shoulder open the door to the studio, grab a seat, and start to get set up.
A voice nearly makes you jump out of your skin as Kim Taehyung leans in, having occupied the seat next to you while you were off in la-la land. “Know what the new unit is?” You start to shake your head, then realize it was a rhetorical question when he waggles his eyebrows and continues. “Life drawing. Ready for some naked people?”
You roll your eyes and grab at the strings of his gray beanie, pulling it down over his fluffy hair and eyes in one swift tug. “Bro, we are literally in grad school. Stop acting like a virgin.”
“Like you weren’t thinking it too,” he grumbles to himself as he shoves the hat back up his forehead.
You shoot him a look as your professor signals the class to settle and launches in. It’s the same routine as each unit you’ve rotated through in your graduate studio, so you only half-listen, mostly distracted by Taehyung tearing open the paper wrapper of a red heart-shaped lollipop and popping it into his mouth. His latest oral fixation in his millionth attempt to quit vaping.
You lean down to dig into your bag, trying to ignore the sound of hard candy clacking against teeth as you fish out both pencils and charcoal to give yourself options. You pull a couple of each out of their cases, glancing up in an attempt to refocus on the professor, who is still talking.
It takes a second for your brain to process the image in front of you. His shy smile has been replaced with a serious, professional expression, but there’s no questioning the familiar face, the posture, the silver jewelry, the way he reaches up to run a hand through his hair. Subway Boy Park Jimin is standing in the center of the room, wearing a short black satin dressing gown.
Your jaw goes slack. It feels like it happens in slow motion as you watch Jimin’s strong hands move down to undo the sash at his waist before he shrugs off the flimsy fabric and lets it fall to the floor. And then he’s not wearing anything at all.
You lose your grip entirely on your handful of pencils, and they hit the studio floor with a clatter that certainly feels deafening, each one choosing to roll off in a different direction.
Taehyung glances over at you, brow slightly creased. The lollipop tucked in his cheek impedes his speech slightly, but not enough that you can’t understand him. “Now who’s the virgin?”
You crouch down, praying that maybe you can gather your things unnoticed, but it already feels like every pair of eyes in the room is burning a hole in your back. To his credit, Taehyung at least helps a little, extending a sandaled foot to kick any pencils he can reach over towards you. You scramble around the room to chase after the rest, and you can’t bear to look up and see if Jimin is watching you or not. You’re not sure which would be worse.
Fighting the urge to army crawl out of the room, you grip both hands tightly around your materials as you return to your seat, then tuck everything into the tray of the easel in front of you. You’re a professional, you tell yourself. It’s not like it’s your first time drawing someone nude.
It’s just your first time doing it when you happen to have a crush on them.
But it’s fine. You let out an exhale to ground yourself, then pick up a pencil. It’s just a body.
You vaguely recall hearing your professor explain that you’d be moving through ten quick-sketch poses to begin with, each held for only a few minutes, before switching to a few longer sessions for the rest of class. As you were too busy chasing your pencils around the room, you’ve missed the first pose entirely, and you have to work quickly to get a very rough outline of the second before Jimin moves again at the professor’s instruction.
He switches so fluidly from one pose to the next, and you have so little time, it’s enough to get you out of your head just trying to keep up. You find yourself falling comfortably into a flow state, focused on little more than lines and shapes in front of you and the act of reproducing them on your page. It’s an exercise you know well, and the repetition of it soothes you.
The studio is quiet, save for the scratching of pencils on paper and the soft classical music your professor has switched on.
By the time you finish sketching the tenth pose, it feels like you can breathe a little easier, and your professor offers Jimin a quick break just as you lean back to admire your work. You do your best to quickly duck behind your easel as he stretches, then reaches for a bottle of water set on a nearby table.
Taehyung removes his sheet of sketches and sets it aside before leaning in, pressing his face against his easel to match yours. “He’s cute. Bet he gets like, infinite ass-pussy. Just the absolute most.”
“Shut up, Tae!” You jerk your foot out to kick the leg of his chair, and a boxy grin stretches over his face as he giggles. You stare daggers back. “You’re too damn horny today. Like you didn’t just get your ass eaten in the supply closet last week.” The rumor had spread through your cohort practically overnight— probably started by Taehyung himself.
The menace in question shoots you an over-exaggerated wink. “And I’d do it again, too.”
You roll your eyes. “Nasty.”
The professor claps to get everyone’s attention again, and you peer around your easel to watch as Jimin resumes his place at the center of the room. You settle in for the first of a few longer, more detailed sketches, trying desperately to keep your cool about it. But Jimin is unquestionably gorgeous.
He turns to the side for the first pose, arms wrapped around his muscular torso and eyes downcast, fingertips and thumb resting over his neck and chin as if to cradle his own face in his hand. After a long stretch of time where you manage to get most of a sketch done, the professor cues him to move into a second pose, and he faces the back wall, reaching up to drape his arms over each other, crossed wrists resting delicately on the crown of his head.
You could easily see him as a statue carved out of marble, and you try to ignore the flutter of your heartbeat as you attempt to translate his beauty onto your page each time. You have to hold in several sighs as you work on outlining the strong, toned muscles of his back and thighs— not to mention his perky ass. You can’t help but wonder if the rest of the class is struggling silently, too.
You’re beginning to think you might survive after all when the professor asks Jimin to move again and he does, shaking his body out slightly before reaching to grab a provided stool and shift it to the center of the room. He takes a seat, abdominals flexing as he leans back on his hands and unabashedly lets his legs fall open.
Fuck. You nearly snap your pencil in half.
You try desperately to keep it together as you start your third sketch with unsteady hands. The minutes tick by, and you aren’t aware of Taehyung’s eyes on your paper until you hear his stupid whisper again. “Why aren’t you drawing his dick?”
He’s not wrong. There is a noticeable blank spot at the center of your page. “I’m getting there,” you huff. “Worry about your own sketch, Tae.”
“Girl, you are literally doing detail shading on his legs and he doesn’t even have a penis. What is he, a Ken doll?”
You grit your teeth and refuse to dignify Taehyung with a response. Fine. You can do this, you tell yourself. Don’t think. Just look and draw. It’s not a big deal.
With a hard swallow, you trace your eyes down his body, and… well, you don’t know what you were expecting. It’s just a soft penis resting limp between his legs, framed by an extremely regular pair of balls. Nothing scary, though you can’t quite will the heat back out of your face, can’t manage to silence the recurring thought that makes your stomach drop— it’s cute.
You resist the urge to smack your head against your easel as you finally fill in your sketch’s dick.
You somehow manage to survive the rest of class, but relief still floods your veins when your professor signals for everyone to wrap up what they’re doing for the day. Jimin starts to come alive again from the fixed pose, tilting his head to one side until something cracks audibly in his neck. You tear your gaze away for fear that his eyes might find yours, and shove everything into your bag as quickly as you can, not even caring what ends up where.
“Where’s the fire?” Taehyung questions beside you, but you ignore him.
You zip your bag up and sling it over your shoulder, then make a beeline for the exit, keeping your eyes fixed firmly on the floor. It’s only once the studio door swings shut behind you that you feel like you can breathe again, and you have to keep yourself from outright sprinting to your next class.
~*~
The rest of the day rushes by in an overwhelming blur, your focus entirely shot by the events of the morning. You collapse into a seat on your train home, hugging your bag to your chest, thankful for the first time in your life to not be sharing a subway car with Park Jimin.
When you turn your keys in the lock and stumble in the front door of the apartment, the divine smell of what could only be Yoongi’s cooking immediately hits you full-force. You find him in the kitchen with a towel thrown over his shoulder, searing a large steak in a cast iron pan for what must be a planned date night with Namjoon.
You wrap your arms around his tiny waist from behind as you approach. He responds with his usual greeting: a soft grunt of mild discomfort.
“Can I ask you a question?” you ask, trying to sound as sweet as possible.
“You just did,” Yoongi notes.
You decide to let his sass go, since you really do need help. “Two more?” Yoongi hums, somewhat affirmative, and you continue. “I know you work like 47 jobs and never get any time off—“
“Some of us have to pay rent without the luxury of stipends or rich parents, yes—“
“But is there any way I could… maybe possibly encroach upon your date night just this once? It’s an emergency. I need advice.”
Yoongi sighs, and you shift to peek over his shoulder, arms still wrapped around him as you watch the way he tilts the pan to one side, collecting butter on a spoon to baste over the steak as it cooks. You squish your cheek into his bicep.
“Lucky for you,” he begins, his tone relenting, “Namjoonie just called. They’ve got him working late to prep for the exhibition next month. So date night was canceled anyway.”
“Aw, Yoongiiiii.” You squeeze him tight enough that he makes another disgruntled noise, and you finally release your grip. “I’ll be your girlfriend tonight.”
He rolls his eyes, but willingly plays along. “Then get the wine, darling?”
You fall into a typical routine: Yoongi pulls a tray of roasted vegetables out of the oven as he lets the steak rest, while you grab a bottle of red at his instruction and fight with the corkscrew in an attempt to get it open. Yoongi watches you, slow-blinking, unamused.
“You wouldn’t last an hour in the restaurant industry.”
“Either help me, or shut up,” you hiss through clenched teeth.
When you finally get settled at your tiny kitchen table, Yoongi nods as if to prompt you while he fills each wine glass with a heavy pour. “Let’s hear it.”
You take a deep breath before launching in and recounting the events of your day, trying not to choke as you simultaneously stuff your face with food. Yoongi eats and listens quietly, no discernible reaction on his face save the occasional lift of his eyebrows. He leans back and crosses his arms over his chest as you finish detailing the way you ran out of the studio the minute class ended.
“Alright. So you saw Subway Boy naked, big deal. Do you know how many dicks I’ve seen?”
You groan. “Spare me the details, please.”
“But this is what you wanted, right?” You shrug, and he rolls his eyes. “Don’t play coy now. You’ve been lusting after this kid for months like a weirdo. So why are you stressed?”
“Because!” you huff, frustrated. “It’s— it’s out of order. It’s not like he chose to get naked in front of me specifically, he obviously just thought it was going to be a roomful of strangers. And it seemed like maybe we could be friends or something, but now I don’t know if I should keep pursuing that or just leave him alone. I want to be respectful, but I don’t want him to think I took one look at his penis and decided I didn’t like him anymore, but then it’s like, how do I hold a conversation when he and I both know I have seen his penis, not only seen but studied it, drawn it, and will continue to, weekly, in detail, from multiple angles—“
“You are absolutely overthinking this,” Yoongi laughs into his glass of wine, downing the rest before he continues. “Just get on the fucking train and say hi like a normal, well-adjusted human. This is my advice to you.”
You sigh as you shove a roasted potato in your mouth. “At least you’re a good cook.”
“I’m a great cook,” Yoongi corrects you as he gets to his feet. “Now help me with these dishes.”
~*~
Yoongi’s advice continues to echo in your brain as you lapse back into something like normalcy for the rest of the week.
When the day of your studio class rolls around again, you find yourself hustling not to miss the train, having hit snooze on your alarm a few too many times that morning. You fly down the subway steps just as the 6 is pulling into the station, and you try to ignore the way your pulse is already quickening, telling yourself it’s just from rushing and nothing else.
Pulling the strap of your bag up on your shoulder, you make it to the platform just as the train doors slide open, and your heart instantly leaps into your throat. There he is, leaning against a pole, overwhelmingly beautiful as ever. Park Jimin.
He’s scrolling through something on his phone and hasn’t yet looked up to notice you, and you find yourself frozen in place, jostled angrily by commuters exiting and boarding the train on either side of you.
Panic floods your veins. There’s no time to talk yourself off the ledge, no time to remember Yoongi’s words of wisdom, no time to do anything but make a snap decision. So you do the only thing that feels right: you turn around and sprint back up the stairs and out of the subway station.
The sidewalk is equally bustling, and you try to dodge people while you think through what to do despite the way your head is spinning. You were already going to be cutting it close for time today, and you don’t exactly have the disposable income for a taxi or an Uber. As you try to settle your racing thoughts, your eyes alight on a rack of Citibikes.
Fuck it. You don’t have a better option. Securing your bag on your back, you quickly scan the code to unlock the bike, then shove your phone in your pocket and swing your leg over the seat.
You’ve never biked in Manhattan traffic before, but it can’t be that difficult, you tell yourself. Definitely easier than sharing a subway car with Park Jimin.
Thankfully the street you’re on has a defined bike path, and you do your best to follow the flow of traffic, squeezing your hand brakes to slow to a stop when you hit a red light. It’s been years since you’ve ridden a bike that wasn’t stationary, but it comes back to you relatively easily, like— well, riding a bike.
When you hit a long stretch of green lights, you do your best to pick up speed, trying to make up for lost time. An approaching red light threatens to slow you down again, and you breathe a sigh of relief as it flips to green at the last possible second.
Just as your front tire rolls into the intersection, a deafening car horn nearly gives you a heart attack. You instinctively slam your grip tight around your brakes, and your bike screeches to a halt so fast you’re almost flung over the handlebars. A taxi just barely veers around you as it plows down the intersecting avenue, and you gasp for air, adrenaline coursing through your system.
Holy shit.
You drop one foot to the ground for leverage as you try to get your pulse back under control— you’re pretty sure you just saw your life flash before your eyes. Reality feels a million miles away, but you’re vaguely aware of someone shouting after the car as it speeds down the street.
“Fucking asshole!”
It takes a few seconds for you to realize that it’s a familiar voice, and when you do, you whip around as best you can with a bike between your legs.
“Yoongi?!”
“Oh my god,” Yoongi groans, knuckles blanching as he presses down on his own brakes. “What the fuck are you doing?”
You squint, taking in the helmet strapped over his wavy dark hair and the insulated bag tucked into the basket on the front of his bike. “Since when do you deliver food?”
He grimaces, speaking up to be heard over the noise of traffic. “I just do it to make extra money when my hours suck.”
“What about the coffee shop?”
He shakes his head. “They only have me opening Mondays and Wednesdays right now.”
“What about the bar?”
“That’s just weekends, reliably. Sometimes extra evenings, but only if someone calls out.”
“What about the—”
“Christ, woman!” Yoongi cuts you off with a growl. “The food’s gonna get cold if I have to sit here and run through my entire résumé with you! Are you alright? Why aren’t you taking the subway?”
“Because!” you snap back. “There is a man on that train whose dick I’ve seen and I… I don’t know how to handle it! Okay?!” Though you don’t intend to raise your voice, it comes out loud enough that a group of high school kids on their phones exchange stifled giggles as they fast-walk around you.
“Well you need to be fucking careful,” Yoongi chides. “Biking in the city is not for the faint of heart. And if I’m not allowed to give in to my suicidal ideation, you’re not allowed to crack your head open on the pavement all because you’re trying to avoid a penis.”
“Fine,” you spit back through gritted teeth. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to get to class.” You push off the asphalt, legs still shaking a little with excess nerves as you re-find your balance and make your way cautiously through the intersection.
The rush of wind in your ears isn’t quite loud enough to drown out Yoongi calling after you as you bike away. “It’s only weird if you make it weird!”
When you somehow make it to Astor Place in one piece, you dock your bike and quickly sprint to the building, well aware that you’re already late. It’s only once you push the studio door open that you realize how truly frazzled and out of breath you are, and though you keep your gaze fixed on the floor, you can feel every pair of eyes in the room on you. You hold a hand up in an apologetic wave and hurry to find your seat.
Trying to collect yourself, you begin to unpack your materials as quietly as possible so as not to disturb the class. You nearly jump out of your skin when you hear Kim Taehyung’s voice beside you.
“You’re sweaty. Why are you so sweaty?”
He’s got an eyebrow cocked when you look over, and you give him the most powerful death glare you can muster, enough that it must actually scare him. “Shutting up now,” Taehyung murmurs, voice shaking slightly as he returns to his own sketches, and you huff an exhale as you attempt to catch up to the rest of the group.
Class passes surprisingly quickly once you manage to get your breath back, much in the same way it did the week prior: you do your best to compartmentalize the body in front of you from the human person you have a giant, embarrassing crush on. It goes decently well in the moments where Jimin is frozen in a fixed pose, just lines and curves and light and shadow for you to emulate. During the breaks when he comes alive again, you hide out behind your easel, trying to ignore Taehyung’s inane bullshit and wishing you could disappear entirely.
The second your professor dismisses everyone for the day, you stuff your things back into your bag, hoping to once again speed-walk out of the room.
But despite your better judgment, you can’t help yourself this time. As you get to your feet, you glance up to watch Jimin pull his dressing gown back on, only to realize his eyes are already on you.
You’re distinctly aware of how much of a mess you must look from biking over, and the fact that you almost assuredly smudged charcoal on your face when you reached up absentmindedly to scratch an itch mid-sketch.
Jimin’s plush lips turn up in the smallest of smiles, and the bottom drops out of your stomach.
With a hard swallow, you avert your gaze from his, sling your bag over your shoulder, and quickly make your escape through the studio door. You can feel your pulse pounding in your throat even after he’s out of your sight, and your hands shake like a leaf all the way to your next class.
~*~
That night, sleep evades you until the early hours of the morning, and it feels like you’ve only just begun to doze off when the harsh noise of your alarm pulls you up from dreaming. You roll over in bed and glare accusingly at your phone, then shut it off, promptly letting the waves drag you under once more, seminar be damned.
It’s nearly noon when you finally make it out of bed and stumble into the living room in your sweats. Namjoon is curled up in his reading chair, a feat for someone of his size, surrounded as always by his massive stack of ever-changing ‘to read’ books. He glances up from the one that’s open on his lap, clearly surprised to see you.
“No class?” Namjoon’s voice is rough-edged, like he’s only just woken up himself.
“Skipped,” you grunt. His eyes track you as you cross the room and collapse face-first onto the couch.
“Is this about the penis?”
The cushion muffles your groan. “Not you too.”
You hear the distinct fluttering sound of Namjoon closing his book and shifting in his seat to give you his undivided attention. “Seems like you want to talk about it.”
You turn your head to the side to take in your roommate. “Maybe. Are you gonna give me the same stupid advice your boyfriend did?”
He smiles softly, one dimple flexing at the corner of his mouth. “I can try to be gentler.”
You huff as you flip onto your side, pressing your palms together and slipping them under your cheek. “Sounds like you’ve got the details already, so please. Enlighten me. Tell me how I’m supposed to handle seeing this guy naked once a week in the name of art.”
“Didn’t William Blake say ‘Art can never exist without naked beauty displayed’?” Namjoon poses it like a serious question, brow creased as if in contemplation, and you roll your eyes.
“I don’t know, Joon, did he? I said enlighten me, not write me a thesis.” You reach up to grab a couch pillow and fling it in his direction, missing by several inches. “Did Blake have anything in there on dealing with a naked crush and trying not to make it weird as fuck?”
“Well, does he seem weirded out by it?” Namjoon counters, patient as ever.
“I don’t know.” You shrug unsurely as you play back your last interaction with Jimin. “He smiled at me yesterday, at the end of class.”
Namjoon steeples his fingers together, leaning forward slightly in his chair, interest clearly piqued. “Okay, and what did you do?”
You squeeze your eyes shut. “I… threw all my shit in my bag and ran out of the room.” When you crack an eye open again, you can see Namjoon trying and failing to keep the smug smile off his face, his dimples giving him away.
“Maybe you could try smiling back next time?” he gently suggests.
You sigh, because you know he’s right. “You make it sound so easy. What’s next? You’re going to tell me to talk to him?”
He laughs a little. “I’d quote another poet, but I fear you might launch more projectiles at me.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “Let’s hear it, nerd.”
Namjoon clears his throat for dramatic effect before launching into a recitation. “‘It’s cool, not tryna put a rush on you / I had to let you know, that I got a crush on you.’”
There’s a wide grin on his face as you sit all the way up. “Did you just quote Biggie Smalls at me?”
“Hey, I appreciate all forms of poetry.”
You feign annoyance, but you can’t quite hide the smile beneath it, and you get to your feet as Namjoon continues to mumble a verse of Crush on You under his breath. “Whatever. I need to do laundry.”
“Oh—” Namjoon pauses to interrupt himself. “Lucky’s closed, by the way.”
Already halfway out of the living room, you whip around again at the mention of the laundromat you’ve been exclusive with for the last few years. “What?”
He nods solemnly. “Me and Yoongi found out the hard way last week. They’re putting in an Equinox.”
Your face twists in disgust. “A stupid bougie gym?! You’ve got to be kidding me. Where am I supposed to wash my fucking clothes?”
“We found a place a few blocks up. Quick Clean, or something like that.” Namjoon shifts to dig his phone out of his pocket. “I’ll send you the address. It’s not bad, just a little more expensive.”
“This is such bullshit,” you groan as you stomp back into your bedroom, the day already off to a terrible start.
In a gentrification-induced rage, you angrily shove the contents of your overflowing laundry hamper into the giant yellow IKEA bag hung up in your closet, just barely managing to fit it all. Glancing at the mirror on the back of the door, you briefly consider changing out of your sweats, or at the very least doing something with your hair, but you shrug it off— it’s not like you’re trying to impress anyone at the damn laundromat.
You grab your headphones off your desk and sling them around your neck, double-check that your sketchbook is still tucked into your bag, then lug everything out to the front hallway. You pull your slides off the shoe rack and slip your socked feet into them.
“Bye, nerd!” you call over your shoulder to Namjoon before the front door slams shut behind you.
By the time you make it to the weird new laundromat, you’re sweaty and pissed off. You knew the walk to Lucky’s by heart, but you had to do this one while looking down at your phone GPS and trying not to get hit by a car. Not an easy feat while carrying every article of clothing you own over one shoulder.
You miss the way the nice old man who owned Lucky’s would greet you warmly and sneak you a cup of coffee from his pot in the back, the way his cat would roll over on the front counter for belly rubs, the way there was always a deeply entertaining telenovela playing on the ancient tiny TV.
The stupid Quick Clean has none of these things, just a shitty pile of magazines in the seating area and weirdly sticky floors. You slam into the front door a little harder than is necessary to push it open, the bell tinkling violently overhead as you enter. The only compliment you can give the place is that it’s relatively dead, save for a couple people on their phones or half-asleep in chairs as they wait on their stuff, and two guys in the corner loading armfuls of wet clothes into a pair of dryers.
You grab a machine a respectful distance away from them and swing the door open when a laugh that’s nearly musical gives you pause. Unable to shake a sense of familiarity, you glance over at your neighbors again, just in time to see one of them reach up to run a hand through his honey blonde hair.
Your IKEA bag hits the sticky floor with an audible thud as panic kickstarts your heart.
This isn’t fucking happening. Of all the laundromats in New York City, you did not just manage to stumble into the one currently being used by Park Jimin.
But even before you can catch a glimpse of his profile, you’re already certain it can’t be anyone else. You’ve spent too much time familiarizing yourself with the slope of his neck, the definition of his forearms, his dainty hands. There’s no mistaking them, adorned today with several silver rings that catch the dim fluorescent light as he grabs more of his clothes from the washer.
The desperate need to turn around and run rises up in your chest, just as before, but this time you steel yourself. You can’t keep running away forever— particularly not when you pulled on your last clean pair of underwear this morning.
A rush of heat floods your face at the thought of the many pairs of underwear in your bag that will soon be sent spinning around this washing machine, where Jimin could easily see, but then it occurs to you that you have seen his penis. Maybe the trade-off will put you on slightly more equal footing.
But you really don’t need to be thinking about Park Jimin’s penis in this laundromat right now.
Shaking your head slightly to try and banish the thought, you set about your laundry routine, trying not to drop any unmentionables on the floor when you dump the contents of your tote into the washer. You dig quarters out of your bag and slot them into the machine, then press the button to start the cycle.
With a final exhale to steady yourself, you turn to look over your shoulder again, only to find Jimin leaning up against the empty dryer next to his, unabashedly watching you with a small smile on his face.
It occurs to you now that you couldn’t have put less effort into your appearance if you tried, and you’re suddenly hyper-aware of every random stain on your sweatpants and your extremely fashionable socks and slides combination. Jimin’s just in a white t-shirt and a pair of distressed jeans today, but literally everything looks fresh off the runway on him. You suppress the urge to walk out the door and go lay down in traffic, and instead take Namjoon’s advice: you smile back and even lift your hand in a shy wave.
You drop into an empty chair across from your machine and watch as Jimin starts to cross the room to join you, his eyes never leaving yours. Before he can make it, you suddenly become aware of someone else sliding into the seat beside you.
“You didn’t tell me she was cute, Jimin-ah!”
Eyes wide, you turn to see Jimin’s friend sprawled out next to you, one arm draped lazily over the back of your chair. His wavy dark hair peeks out from under a lime green beanie, and he’s swimming in an oversized long sleeve tucked into baggy pants, cinched tight at the waist with a Gucci belt.
“Jung Hoseok,” he gives you a nod. “Friends call me Hobi. You can call me whatever you like.” The way his wide smile pulls his mouth heart-shaped makes you giggle a little, slightly dazed by whatever the fuck is happening right now.
You hear Jimin sigh as he takes the open seat on your other side. “Please ignore Hoseok’s tendency to come on way too strong. If it makes you feel any better, he’s as gay as they come.”
Hoseok flicks his wrist just so. “Guilty as charged.”
“Oh, it’s okay,” you say with a shrug, your gaze flitting from Jimin to Hoseok and back again. “I have two gay roommates, so.”
Hoseok hums, clearly interested. “Gay together or gay separately?”
“Gay together.”
He narrows his eyes. “Open to a third?”
You can’t help but laugh at the unexpected question. “Uh, I’d have to ask.”
He looks like he’s going to say more, but Jimin interjects. “Hoseok— can we get a minute?”
Hoseok’s lips pull together, fish-like, and he nods as he gets to his feet. “Say no more. I’ll just, uh…” He fumbles, looking around for something to do, then crosses the room to take the open seat next to the sad pile of magazines. “…do a little light reading.” He picks up one at the top of the stack, holding it up for you both to witness. “Oh look, the queen died!”
You bite down on your bottom lip to suppress another laugh, but Jimin’s face is surprisingly serious when you look back at him. “I just want to say one thing,” he murmurs, voice low, “and then I’ll leave you alone.”
Nerves settle in the pit of your stomach like a heavy weight. “Jimin,” you start, and when he opens his mouth to keep talking, you blurt out the first thing you can think of.
“I’m sorry,” you say in unison, and there’s a beat where you both blink, equally taken aback by the other’s apology. It’s quiet apart from the rumble of the laundry machines and the distinct sound of Hoseok smacking the magazine over his mouth, clearly more invested in your plot line.
You break the silence first. “Wait, why are you sorry?”
Jimin’s eyes drop down to the floor, one black boot toeing nervously at the tile. “I figured you were upset with me because I didn’t warn you.”
Your eyes widen in surprise when you play your initial conversation back. “Oh my god— when I said graduate studio art, you… you knew.”
He nods, somewhat remorseful. “I was kind of hoping that maybe it would be a different class, but. Yeah. I figured. I’m really sorry, I should’ve—”
“No, no,” you interrupt. “I get it. I’m not mad, obviously I didn’t even put it together until right now.” You pause for a second and can’t help but smile a little. “And, I mean, how do you just casually work that into your first conversation with someone? ‘Great talking to you, ready to see my dick in five minutes?’”
Jimin’s head tips back when he laughs, his cheeks flushing a faint shade of pink. “Right.”
You can feel your own face grow hot as you realize what you’ve just said. “God, sorry, I didn’t mean to— clearly I don’t know how to handle this. That’s why I wanted to apologize, for avoiding you and being weird.” You twist your hands uncomfortably in your lap. “I’ve just never been in this situation before, and I wasn’t sure if you’d still want to talk given… the…” Every cell in your body screams at you not to say the word ‘dick’ again. “Yeah. I thought it might be easier to keep my distance. Keep it separate.”
Jimin’s eyes drift back up to find yours, and his casual beauty is so stunning, it’s enough to knock the air out of your lungs. He shrugs softly. “I mean, maybe it would be. But I don’t want to.”
“Great,” you manage a laugh, still breathless. “Because I nearly died on a Citibike the day I didn’t take the subway.”
He laughs, too. “Not gonna lie, I missed seeing you on the train.” You’re not expecting it when he extends a hand out. “Friends?”
You realize belatedly that he’s offering a handshake, and you gently take his hand in yours. His skin is soft and warm, a contrast to the cool metal of his rings that press into your palm as he squeezes.
“Friends,” you echo with a smile, squeezing back.
There’s a sudden thump and a cackle as Hoseok falls out of his chair with a peal of laughter. “You are so fucking weird, Jimin-ah!” he gasps from his spot on the floor. “Who shakes hands?!”
The two of them keep you more than entertained until the buzzers on their dryers sound a second apart from each other. You learn that Hoseok and Jimin are roommates, that they met as dance majors in their undergrad program, and that Hoseok now works as an adjunct instructor and freelance choreographer.
“Because some of us decided we wanted to actually make money instead of digging ourselves further into debt,” he explains with a sly grin and smack delivered to the back of Jimin’s head.
You watch as they meticulously fold, Hoseok regularly leaning over to redo Jimin’s work and chide him about wrinkles, and then they stack the clean laundry back into their bags and head for the exit.
“Bye, new friend!” Hoseok calls as he maneuvers the door open with his foot, and Jimin pauses at the threshold, the bell overhead tinkling gently.
“So… guess I’ll see you on the train?” he asks, like he’s still a little unsure, and your heartbeat flutters.
“Guess so.”
“Cool.” He gives you one last soft smile before he disappears after Hoseok. The bell sounds again when the door shuts behind him, as if to snap you back to reality.
The floating feeling in your stomach doesn’t quite dissipate even long after Jimin has left the laundromat. While you wait on your clothes, you flip to a blank page in your sketchbook and start on something new: the outline of a hand extended in mid-air, rings glinting like an offered promise.
~*~
The next week, Jimin is waiting for you on your morning subway ride, the dance bag that he usually keeps tucked between his legs set on the bench next to him. When he sees you step through the train doors at 51st, you watch him reach over to swing the bag down to its rightful place on the floor, freeing up the space. An open invitation.
You can’t help but feel a little shy as you sink down next to him and murmur your thanks. There’s something about being this close to him that just makes your mind go blank, puts you at a loss for words entirely.
To your surprise, he doesn’t try to strike up conversation either. Instead he plucks one fancy bluetooth earbud out of his ear, gives it a diplomatic swipe across the fabric of his joggers, then holds it up, pinched between his fingers in front of you.
Another invitation, you realize dumbly.
The corner of your mouth turns up as you pluck the bud out of his hand and press it into your own ear. The music that must have paused itself upon the earbud’s removal resumes, and your smile grows when Jimin quickly unlocks his phone to restart the song from the beginning.
An acoustic guitar and a light, pretty voice fill your ear, underscored by a gentle yet driving beat, not unlike the rumble of the train beneath your feet. It’s like the rest of the world fades away to nothing as you stare down at his sneakers next to your shoes, hyper-aware of the mere inch or two of space between you in this moment.
As if to prove your point, the train comes to a sharp stop, enough to make you slide a little on the bench and then you’re suddenly not just close but touching, all the way down, an unbroken line from shoulder to hip to knee.
When you look over in surprise, Jimin is already looking back at you. You swear you can feel warmth radiating out from him at every point where your bodies press together.
After another dazed moment, you come to your senses enough to scoot over, breaking the contact with an embarrassed laugh as you feel your face grow hot.
Your gaze drifts back down to the floor, only to snap up again at another brush of contact, this one not initiated by you or by the motion of the train. Instead, you realize Jimin has spread his legs an inch wider to purposefully touch his knee to yours again and leave it there. You blink softly as you look over at him, but he’s staring firmly out the window of the subway car now, smiling with just his eyes.
For the rest of the ride, you think of little else but Jimin’s knee pressed against yours and the pretty pink flush in his cheeks.
You stay in comfortable silence, music floating in your ears as you exit the train at Astor Place together, until you reach the studio, where you finally return the borrowed earbud. He smiles as he tucks them both back into the case, then pushes open the door and gestures for you to enter first.
Jimin shoots you a final look before your paths diverge, and you sink into your seat with a small, dreamy sigh. Your bliss is short-lived when you hear Taehyung’s voice over your shoulder.
“That was fast.”
You whip around to shoot him a look. “What was fast?”
He makes a face, like it’s obvious. “You’re already banging the model and it’s been, what, two weeks?”
Taehyung’s just close enough that you can lean forward and smack him on the arm, and he hisses in a way that has to be an exaggeration. Thankfully he seems to take the hint, and manages to actually keep his mouth shut as the professor commands everyone’s attention at the center of the room.
When Jimin emerges in the usual black satin, you try to keep your composure, but you can’t ignore the chill that dots up your spine when he lets the fabric fall to the floor.
Nevertheless, you sink into the routine of class, the thrill of Jimin’s naked body now equal parts familiar and exhilarating. The only difference is that today, when you’re dismissed, you make no effort to quickly pack up. You instead purposefully take your time, adding a few extra details to your last sketch before you finally start putting things away. Your gaze flickers up distractedly to see Jimin pulling his dressing gown back over his body as he moves to close the distance between you.
“Hi,” he says simply when he reaches your easel, and you smile.
“Hi.”
“Sorry, is, uh— is it okay that I talk to you, when I’m—” He gestures vaguely to his lower half with one hand, using the other to keep himself covered.
You swallow hard at the thin layer of fabric and everything you know lies beneath it. “Yeah, it’s okay,” you say, hating how breathless you sound.
“When are you done with classes today?”
It takes an extra second for you to remember your own schedule. “Uh, six.”
Jimin fidgets with the satin material in his hands, clearly a little uncomfortable. Or maybe nervous. “Would you… want to get dinner after? With me?”
Your stomach flutters as you nod. “Yeah, yes. I’d like that.”
~*~
When you emerge from your last class, you find Jimin waiting for you on Astor Place, and you’re not expecting it when he greets you with a single question: “Do you like sushi?” You answer affirmatively, and he nods over his shoulder. “Then let’s walk this way.”
You end up tucked into two seats at a place you’ve never been to before, where rolls and other plates of food zip past you on a steadily moving conveyor belt. Jimin shows you how to pop the plates out from their protective domes, and you gather a small feast of options on the table between you to share.
“So,” you start with a nervous smile, chopsticks hovering in midair. “Can I ask the obvious question?”
He quirks an eyebrow, intrigued. “What’s that?”
“What made you decide to nude model?” The words alone send fresh waves of heat and nerves through you, sparkling in your chest. “Or have you done it before?”
“I haven’t,” Jimin confirms with a shake of his head, then he pops a piece of sushi in his mouth as if to buy himself time. He chews, bringing a hand up as he speaks with his mouth still half-full. “Do you want the real answer?”
You nod, and his adam’s apple jerks as he swallows. There’s a look on his face like he isn’t quite sure what to say, and then he exhales a weighty sigh. “I’ve struggled with my body for a really long time. Especially in undergrad.”
Your eyes widen slightly— you weren’t expecting such a serious response.
“Dance doesn’t typically have the best culture for that to begin with,” he continues, “and I’d spend literally all day staring at myself in a mirror, so I would just… pick myself apart. Always convinced I wasn’t good enough, that I needed to lose more weight, always.”
The thought of it makes your heart ache, but you let him talk.
“I’m through the worst of it now, so please don’t feel like you need to be worried. But I have some friends who’ve done this kind of thing before and it seemed like, I don’t know, a good challenge?” His brow creases, contemplative. “I really love art, so I thought maybe if I did it, I might be able to see my body in a new way, through the eyes of other people. Of artists.” He pauses, then nods, like he’s said his piece.
It takes you a second to respond. “That’s… beautiful, Jimin.”
He looks down, clearly a little uncomfortable. “Sorry if that was too heavy.”
“I can take it,” you say softly, and it’s enough to make him glance back up in surprise. “Thank you for telling me.”
A faint color floods his face. “Thanks for listening.”
You eat in a silence that’s oddly comfortable, and when you both reach for the same piece of sushi and end up knocking chopsticks together, he lets you have it, picking up the thread of conversation again as he smiles. “What got you into art?”
You make a face, chased by an unsure shrug. “Is it bad if I say it’s the only thing I feel like I’m good at?”
Jimin laughs a little. “I don’t know that I believe you.”
“I mean,” you lean back in your seat. “Maybe not the only thing, but I’ve just never been able to see myself doing anything else. I’m not cut out for the corporate life, as much as my parents wish I was. Art’s always been the thing that I go to in my free time. When I’m feeling so much that it’s overwhelming, or so numb that it’s like I can’t feel anything, the act of creating something just… brings me back to center again.” You worry your bottom lip between your teeth. “It’s an outlet, I guess.”
“Well, if it helps, you’re very good at it.”
“Thanks,” you say with a small smile. “But it’s not even about being good, at least not to me. Maybe it sounds weird, but I don’t really have any interest in being the best. It’s art, so it’s all subjective anyway. I just wanna make stuff.”
Jimin smirks as he adds another empty plate to the growing stack in front of you, tongue poking briefly at the inside of his cheek before he speaks. “I could stand to be more like you.”
“Your turn,” you shoot back. “Why dance?”
At this, he actually brings a hand up to cover his face, and his voice is muffled under his palm when he responds. “I can tell you exactly why, but it’s embarrassing.”
You shift a little in your chair to get a better look at him. “Don’t be embarrassed! It’s not like I—” you cut yourself off before you can very obviously finish the sentence with ‘haven’t seen your dick’, and you shove a piece of sushi in your mouth to shut yourself up, so fast you nearly choke.
Jimin laughs loudly into his hands, and then you’re laughing too, dropping your head down on the table to try and chew your food without asphyxiating.
“Okay, okay,” he gasps when he can finally manage to take a breath in. “I’ll tell you.”
He sets his chopsticks down, overly serious. “When I was little, I was obsessed with Titanic. Specifically the scene where they dance together, and Rose rises up on her toes in front of everyone.” There are practically stars in his eyes as he recounts the moment, and you can’t bear to cut him off. “I just thought she was so beautiful, and I wanted to be like that. Almost broke my toes trying to go en pointe barefoot like an idiot.”
You’re silent for a moment, and there’s a flicker of panic in Jimin’s face, like he’s worried he overshared. “I have to be honest,” you say softly. “I’ve never seen Titanic.”
His eyes nearly pop out of his head. “What?!”
Already expecting the reaction, you grimace and nod. “I know, I know. Everyone gets mad at me for it. Go ahead.”
Jimin’s eyes flit from your face to the remaining piece of sushi on the plate between you, then back again. “I mean, we can go solve this problem right now, if you want.” He pauses, then admits with a giggle, “I have it on DVD.”
You shrug, trying to act casual despite the way your pulse has started to quicken. “They canceled my morning seminar for tomorrow, so I’m down.”
He leans forward to steal the last piece of sushi with a smug smile. “Then let’s get out of here.”
It’s a short train ride back to Jimin’s place, and you make it in the front door just in time to see Hoseok slipping out of what looks to be his bedroom. You barely process him as the same person— tonight his dark hair is swept off his forehead, and he’s in nice dress pants and a white button-down, unbuttoned just enough to display the delicate spread of his collarbone.
“Hi kids!” he calls in greeting, and you wave back as you kick your shoes off.
Hoseok crosses to grab a mirrored pair of aviators and his keys off the table by the front door. “Daddy’s going out. You two have fun, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” He pauses for a moment, like he’s waiting for a joke to land, then cracks a grin. “By which I obviously mean do whatever the fuck you want.”
As Hoseok pulls the door shut behind him, you follow Jimin into the living room, where you perch nervously on the edge of the couch while he disappears into the kitchen. “Do you like prosecco?” he asks, raising his voice slightly to be heard.
“Uh, I think so,” you say unsurely. “I don’t think I ever developed enough of a palette to have wine preferences.”
“White and sparkling?”
“Sounds good,” you respond, and then you hear the distinct noise of a cork popping before he returns with a bottle and two glasses in hand. He sets everything on the coffee table as he takes a seat next to you, then leans forward to fill both glasses nearly to the brim.
Jimin’s face flushes when you giggle softly at the pour. “Sorry— I like to drink. You don’t have to finish it all.” You shrug and take a healthy pull from your glass. It’s crisp and light, with little bubbles that fizz and pop all the way down. 
“Hoseok calls me a lush,” he admits with a shy laugh as he picks up his own drink and turns to face you, sitting back against the arm of the couch. You shift to mirror him, curling your socked feet up under you. He takes a sip, then seems to think better of it, leaning forward to set his glass down on the table again. “I did want to tell you something. A couple of things, I guess.”
The sentence makes your stomach twist, and you try your best to ignore it. “What’s up?”
Jimin’s lips press together for a moment, as if he’s trying to figure out how to word whatever he’s about to say. “I’m not, like, trying to be presumptuous by telling you this but I just— I don’t want it to go unsaid and then come up later and be a whole big thing, so. I just want you to know that Hoseok is my ex.”
Your eyes widen in surprise. You’re not sure what you were expecting, but certainly not that.
“We dated freshman year of undergrad, for… maybe three months? It was the kind of thing where I knew I was bi in high school but was too scared to act on it, so when I moved to New York I just, like, dated the first gay person I met? Which was probably a little shitty of me. We quickly realized we work much better as friends, and it was a very mutual thing. No hard feelings.”
You nod slowly, trying to keep up. “And you’ve lived together since then?”
“No, no,” Jimin replies quickly, and he nearly grimaces as he continues. “At the end of last semester, I, uh… I got out of a pretty bad long-term relationship.” The way he says it makes your heart sink a little. “And she and I lived together, so Hoseok was extremely gracious and offered to take me in.”
He reaches for his glass of wine again, then pauses with it halfway to his mouth. “Ideally the number of exes I’d be living with would be zero, but. You know. This is definitely the better option, at least until I can figure out what comes next.”
A pause settles between you while he takes a long drink and you try to process all this new information. “I’m sorry about the breakup,” you say softly, and he shakes his head as he swallows.
“Don’t be. It was a very good thing. Long overdue.”
“Well,” you correct yourself, the corners of your mouth pulling up. “Then I’m sorry that it took so long.”
At this, he smiles back. “Me fuckin’ too.”
After one more sip, Jimin sets his wine back down on the coffee table, then rolls off the couch— surprisingly graceful— to retrieve Titanic from the small collection of movies lined up on the shelf beneath the TV.
“Ready?”
“This better have a happy ending,” you murmur over the edge of your wine glass. Jimin laughs so hard he nearly tips over.
He settles next to you again as the movie starts, painted pretty in the blue glow of the TV, and you try your best to watch the movie, but it’s hard to keep your eyes off him. Partway through you notice him grab a pillow off the back of the couch and hug both of his arms around it, curling up small.
Cute, you can’t help but think to yourself, and you can feel heat settle in your face as you try to refocus on the story.
When you reach the dancing scene Jimin sits up a little, lips parting slightly, that same starry look in his eyes as when he explained it initially. The mental image of a younger version of him equally enraptured by the moment nearly makes your chest cave in.
The movie goes on, and you’re draining the last of your second glass of wine when out of the corner of your eye, you see Jimin’s eyes go wide. Jack and Rose are closely examining a rare diamond necklace, and you don’t understand what he could be reacting to until Kate Winslet delivers her next line.
“Jack, I want you to draw me like one of your French girls.”
Your eyes go just as wide as Jimin’s, and you let out a laugh of disbelief that’s nearly a scream. “Oh my fucking god, Park Jimin! You did this on purpose!”
“I swear, I didn’t! I didn’t even think about that part until right now!” He shakes his head desperately as he gasps for air, and he doubles over with his own laughter, rolling right off the couch, arms still clutched tightly around his pillow.
“I literally cannot believe this.” You dissolve into giggles as you sink to your knees on the floor beside him, close to tears.
It takes time for you both to recover, but Jimin eventually manages to pull himself back up to sitting, shoulders still shaking slightly with laughter. He lets the pillow drop to the floor and presses both of his palms down into it as he leans towards you. “But hey, maybe that’s why I like you.”
He’s so magnetic, so beautiful, you can’t help but lean in, too. “You like me?”
There’s a warm glow of color in his cheeks, and you’re not sure if you can blame it entirely on the wine. “I do.”
Your lingering smile slowly starts to soften, and now your heart feels like it might pound out of your chest. “So what, you’re Rose and I’m Jack?”
His gaze drops to your mouth, his voice barely more than a whisper as he murmurs, “Uh-huh”. Imaginary violins swell in your head as you surge forward to close the distance and press your lips to his.
Jimin’s lips are soft and warm, and your head spins as you sit up on your knees and lean into the kiss. While his mouth moves gently against yours, his palms press to the small of your back, and the heat of his hands radiates through the thin fabric of your shirt. You wrap your arms over his shoulders, partially for balance and partially in an attempt to pull him closer to you.
He tilts his head, and you whimper against him when you feel his tongue trace delicately over your bottom lip. He returns a breathy noise back as he licks slowly into your mouth, like he’s taking his time, like he’s not in any rush.
Even though you can feel your arousal starting to build, heavy in your gut and slick between your thighs, you realize: you want him to take his time with you.
You’re surprised at the loss when he suddenly leans back, just enough to break the kiss, still keeping you held close. “Is it, um—” he clears his throat, then tries again. “I don’t… want to go any further. Than this. At least not tonight. Is that okay?”
Your eyes search his, and you’re a little breathless when you manage to get the words out. “Yeah. Yeah, of course. I’m good with that. With whatever you want.”
“Okay.” You exhale a laugh when he reaches over to find the remote on the coffee table and pause the movie. “I want to keep kissing you, if that’s alright.”
“Yes, please,” you murmur against his lips.
Jimin shifts a little, and you follow his lead, letting him tip you backwards onto the floor, your arms still looped around his neck, one hand now tangling in his honey blonde hair. He drops a forearm down to the carpet beside you, his other hand coming to rest at the curve of your waist, knees bracketing your hips as he covers your body with his.
He alternates between sucking on your lower lip and gentle passes of his tongue into your mouth, the hand on your waist tracing a lazy path down to your hip and back up again. Something pulled tight inside you starts to slowly unwind, blooming open as you sink into the rhythm, into him.
It’s been such a long time since you’ve just kissed someone like this, without it feeling like part of a race to get naked. And you’ve never been kissed like this in your life— so soft, so attentive. It’s enough to make you dizzy, even with your back pressed flat to the floor.
You lose track of how much time passes as you trade open-mouthed kisses on Jimin’s living room carpet, until he finally pulls away again. Still in a daze, you shift the hand in his hair to gently cup his face, not quite able to believe that he’s really real.
“God,” Jimin breathes, laughing quietly to himself. “I really like you.”
You smile as you blink up at him. “I like you too, Jimin.” 
Rolling over, he drops down onto the floor next to you with a blissed-out sigh. He stretches his arms overhead, spine arching like a cat, then lifts up again to glance back at you. “Do you want more wine? ‘Cause we’re only like halfway done. This movie is stupid long.”
“I could go for more,” you answer with a shrug, still smiling.
In one swift move, Jimin flips his legs over his head and effortlessly somersaults up to standing, and your eyes go wide. “How do you fucking do that?!”
“I’m a trained professional!” he calls over his shoulder as he sashays into the kitchen. You giggle a little. “I would break every bone in my body.”
He’s humming prettily to himself, and you hear the sound of the fridge opening and closing, followed by the pop of another bottle being uncorked. You pull yourself back onto the couch as he rejoins you and pours fresh wine into both glasses, and a sudden curiosity urges you to ask a question. “Is Titanic your favorite movie?”
Jimin shakes his head, but says nothing, and the strange hesitant expression that flashes over his face just makes you that much more intrigued.
“Let’s hear it.”
His eyes flit over to you, then back to the wine glasses. “You’ll laugh.”
“I won’t!” you exclaim, lifting a hand when he scrunches up his nose, doubtful. “Promise.”
With a reluctant sigh, Jimin sets the bottle back down on the table, staring straight ahead as he admits, “It’s The Notebook.”
You press your lips together, trying desperately to keep your mouth in a straight line. At least you manage not to laugh. “I— wow. Really?”
He nods like the reaction is expected, picking up his wine glass and settling back against the couch cushions. “I don’t know, there’s just something about it. It’s comforting, to me.”
“You’re such a romantic,” you murmur, gently nudging his thigh with your foot until you coax a smile out of him.
“You know what?” Jimin’s voice is thoughtful now, more self-assured. “I am.” He takes a sip of his drink before he continues. “For a long time I didn’t want to be. Or thought that I couldn’t be. I used to always try to be so. I don’t know. Masculine, I guess. I think some of it had to do with denying my sexuality, but even once I got around to accepting that, there was still this part of me that would just never allow myself to be… soft.”
His gaze drops down to the wine in his glass, and you sit up, tucking your legs underneath you to scoot closer to him until you’re side by side. “I like you soft,” you say simply, and he looks over at you, still smiling.
“If we watch The Notebook I will cry.”
“That’s okay.” You lean into him to seek a kiss, made sweet from the wine. He hums a little against your lips before you pull back. “Same time next week?”
~*~
Just like that, you fall into a regular routine with Jimin: sharing his headphones on the morning train, sketching out the shape of his body in studio, then picking up takeout and wine to bring back to his place and split over a movie. As predicted, The Notebook does make him cry, and when you show him Kimi no Na wa the week after, hot tears stream down your face at the final scene, the way they always do.
He takes your head in his hands as the credits roll, his thumbs swiping at errant tears on your cheeks. You chase a sniffle with an embarrassed laugh. “Okay. We’re even now.”
On your fourth movie night, partway into Moulin Rouge, something emboldens you when you see Jimin reach for his usual couch pillow. You lean over and gently pry it out of his grip, then shift to tuck yourself into his side and curl your legs up in his lap instead.
“Better?”
“Mm-hmm”, he murmurs as he ducks down to nuzzle against your cheek. “You’re warm.”
These nights end the same way each time: you ride the train home with a wine-soaked buzz in your brain and flushed, kiss-bitten lips, your fingertips brushing over your own mouth at the memory of his.
Once a week quickly turns into more. The two of you coordinate laundromat afternoons where you listen to music together as you wait for your clothes. You usually end up drawing to pass the time, and sometimes Jimin dozes off, head tipping over onto your shoulder so gently that you can’t help but smile down at your sketchbook.
At his request, you help him dye his hair pink in his tiny apartment bathroom, and it somehow suits him just as well as honey blonde. You both get dizzy from laughter and cleaning product fumes as you desperately try to scrub the bubblegum stains out of the tile before Hoseok comes home.
When you finally introduce Jimin to your roommates, the four of you crammed all-too formally around the kitchen table over Yoongi’s cooking, the interaction feels like a cross between a job interview and a prom date meeting your parents. You choke on a piece of chicken that you nearly inhale when Namjoon offhandedly refers to Jimin as Subway Boy, and Yoongi smiles wide enough to show his gums as he gladly recounts your months-long crush in great detail while you bury your burning face in your arms.
But Jimin takes it in stride, laughs into your mouth as he kisses you over the sink while the two of you wash the dishes.
“Subway Boy, huh?”
“I will drown you,” you murmur as you pull away, brandishing the spray hose like a threat.
It’s easy and slow. This blossoming something, a nameless but undeniable spark, the calm comfort of Jimin’s arms wrapped around your waist, his fingers intertwined with yours, his head dropped down on your shoulder.
~*~
You dig your phone out of your pocket as you shoulder open the door to the dance building, pulling up the text from Jimin to double-check his practice room number. A train delay made you slightly later than your agreed-upon time, but you know the takeout bag of Indian food dangling over your wrist will easily earn you his forgiveness.
It doesn’t surprise you that he’s the only one left in the room when you find it, nor that he’s still reviewing the choreography with an expression of severe focus. You hover in the doorway, waiting for him to look up, but he’s entirely concentrated on his own reflection in the mirror.
His movements alternate between delicate and powerful, explosive and restrained, and you have to hold in an outright gasp when he launches his body into an aerial and lands it effortlessly. But then his feet falter in a split second of hesitation, and you can see his expression tighten, clearly frustrated.
“Fuck,” he mutters to himself as he rubs a hand over his face, and he doesn’t even try to keep going with the rest of the dance. You take the opportunity to step a few more paces into the room, and his eyes jump to you in the mirror.
“Hi,” you say softly, suddenly a little nervous to be intruding on the moment. The corner of Jimin’s mouth turns up, but his eyes seem far away, and you can tell he’s still raging at himself in his mind.
“Hi, sorry,” he sighs. “I just— can’t get this. It’s like my body isn’t doing what I tell it to.”
“You need food.” You try to say it gently as you cross the room, holding up the smiley-face adorned plastic takeout bag. “And perhaps the enigmatic charm of Rachel McAdams.”
This seems to shake him out of his thoughts, at least a little. “I do like her.” He steps close enough to slip his arms around your waist and pull your body flush against his. Sweat glistens on his collarbone in the dim practice room lighting. “But I like you more.”
You roll your eyes as you playfully smack a hand against his solid chest. “Stop lying.”
“‘M not,” he insists as he presses a kiss to the hinge of your jaw. “Rachel McAdams has never once brought me masala dosa.” You giggle despite yourself, and when his lips drop down to your neck, it’s enough to make your breath hitch.
A spark ignites in your chest that doesn’t go out, not on the subway ride back to your apartment, not through dinner and a movie, and certainly not once you’re most of the way through the second bottle of wine. As the credits start to roll, you waste no time, turning in Jimin’s lap so you can properly straddle him and take his face in your hands.
You trade decadent, easy kisses, and Jimin’s hands settle at the small of your back, his thumbs massaging gentle circles into your hips. A shiver rolls up your spine when he shifts a little and you realize you can feel a growing bulge through the fabric of his joggers, pressed firm against your thigh. He breathes a soft sound into your mouth as his tongue slides over yours, and you’re so overwhelmed, you barely register the sound of keys in the lock or the front door opening.
It’s Jimin who reacts first, turning his head to break the kiss as his cheeks flood with color, and you glance over your shoulder just in time to see Yoongi storm past, heading for his room. He lifts a hand up to his face to shield you from view as he goes.
“Don’t stop on my account!” Yoongi’s voice is dripping with derision. “By all means, continue fucking on our shared furniture!”
“We’re fully clothed, asshole!” you snap in response as Yoongi slams the bedroom door behind him, hard enough that it rattles in the frame.
When you look back down at Jimin, his face is twisted in an expression you take to be embarrassment. You drop your head down on his shoulder with a frustrated groan, the moment successfully killed.
“Do you…” you pause, turning your head to the side but continuing to ask your question into the fabric of his shirt. “We could go to my room, for more privacy, if you want?”
He hums his agreement, and when you peel yourself off the couch and head for your room, he follows. You spin back around to face him in the doorway, so fast he nearly knocks into you.
You brace your hands on the doorframe as you survey him. “We really don’t have to… do anything, if you don’t want to. We can just talk.”
Jimin nods, and you step aside to let him enter first, pulling the door closed behind you as you follow. He takes a few tentative steps into the room, and you walk past him to drop down onto the floor next to your bed, then pat the carpet to encourage him to join. There’s a flash of something over his face, and then he sinks down beside you. It’s only now that you realize how quiet he’s gotten.
“What is it?” you ask, suddenly a little nervous.
He stares down at the soles of his feet, pressed into each other, his knees tipped open like butterfly wings. “Does it make you feel bad? That we’re not—”
“No,” you answer immediately, and the honesty of it resonates in your chest.
“I know we’ve been hanging out for a while,” he continues, voice low. “And I do want to, you know. Hook up.”
“Jimin,” you lean forward to place both of your hands over one of his, settled atop his knee. “You don’t have to explain anything to me. When you want to, I want to. But I like everything we’ve been doing, too. It’s not like we’re not… intimate.”
His gaze flits up from the floor to meet yours. “I don’t want you to think that I don’t want you.”
You close your fingers around his hand, pulling it off his leg and up to your face so you can brush your lips over his palm.
“I don’t think that at all,” you murmur against his skin. “Promise.”
There’s a hint of a smile in his eyes when you look back up at him. “Okay. Sorry, I know it’s stupid. Like why do I need reassurance from you when I’m the one being difficult?”
You press your cheek into the warmth of his hand, toying lazily with the rings on his fingers. “Why are you so convinced that you’re difficult?”
Jimin huffs a small sigh. “This conversation has not gone this well in the past.” His eyes drop to the floor again, and after a moment’s pause, he keeps talking.
“My ex and I struggled a lot with…” he shakes his head, as if he’s trying not to say ‘everything’. “Sex. With me wanting it, with us having enough of it. I think it gave me a complex. I could be physically, you know, ready, but then as soon as she’d touch me I’d get in my head about everything and freak out and immediately want to stop.” He pauses, worrying at his bottom lip.
You pull his hand into your lap, your fingers delicately tracing over his in an attempt to provide some comfort. He shrugs when he starts to speak again. “And then, I don’t know, I guess she was just trying to share her side, but... she would make me feel so bad about it sometimes. Because I was genuinely trying so hard but it was like I was never good enough.” Another pause, and this time he sniffs a little. When his eyes roll up to stare at the ceiling, you can see he’s holding back tears. “It felt like she didn’t want me anymore, not if there wasn’t sex. So I left.”
“Jimin,” you breathe, and he flashes you a small grimace, clearly embarrassed by his own dramatics. With a grunt of effort, he turns sideways and flops backwards onto the floor of your room, and you scoot closer to him, your hand still playing with his.
His gaze roams over the ceiling as he sighs. “I don’t want you to think I was this perfect person and she was some awful bitch. She loved me a lot, and I’m sure she was struggling with not feeling wanted either, in her own way.”
Your voice is soft when you interject. “Two people can just be… incompatible. It doesn’t mean either of them is a bad person, or that it’s anyone’s fault. Sometimes things just don’t work, no matter how hard you try.”
Jimin’s mouth pulls up on one side as he shakes his head, eyes squinting. “How did you get to be so smart?”
You can’t help but laugh a little, lacing your fingers together with his in your lap. “Years of making terrible decisions.” You give his hand a gentle squeeze before you ask a question. “Did you struggle with this before, or just with her?”
His mouth twists slightly, unsure. “Yes and no? Both? My desire has always… fluctuated, I guess. Been a little shy.” A smile spreads over his face, and he hums a note. “Like, you know how people say love at first sight isn’t a thing? That it’s just lust?” You nod, prompting him to continue. “I think, at least for me, it’s the opposite. I can fall for somebody, and fall hard, like that.” He snaps loudly with his free hand. “But lust… I don’t know, it takes longer. It’s like a slow burn thing.”
You nod again, processing his words for a moment before you respond. “Well, I’m in no rush.”
Jimin sits up, voice thoughtful as he untangles his hand from yours, and it’s clear he’s getting more comfortable opening up to you. “Right after the breakup, I did a lot of research. I found this term, demisexual, that felt pretty accurate.” He shrugs. “But I don’t know. I mostly just think that... I am who I am. And the people who get it will get it. Like you.”
Before you can even speak, he sweeps an arm under your calves to drag you into his lap in one swift move, and you squeak a little in surprise as your world tilts.
“Demisexual. I like it,” you giggle as he guides your legs to wrap around his middle. His hands slide up your thighs, grabbing at your hips to tug you closer so he can trail kisses along your neck.
“Biromantic demisexual, technically,” he murmurs, head tipping up to find your mouth again.
You drape your arms over his shoulders and hum against his lips as he kisses you. “It suits you.”
Another soft noise escapes you when Jimin manages to maneuver to standing with you still in his arms. You tighten your grip on his shoulders and your legs around his waist, and his hands shift down to your ass to firmly hold you up. You squeeze your eyes shut automatically in fear of being dropped, then flutter them open again when you feel your back press into the soft cushion of your bedspread.
Jimin is hovering over you, forearms dropped down to the bed on either side of you. His eyes search yours for a moment, and then he leans in to kiss you again, so fiercely this time that it leaves you breathless. You can’t help but whimper as his tongue slips into your mouth.
When he finally pulls away, he presses his forehead to your collarbone with a groan. “It’s late,” he murmurs, breath ghosting over your neck. “I should go.”
You nod responsibly, despite how desperately you want him to stay.
You walk him out, and his sweet parting kiss leaves your heart hammering in your chest, enough that you slump against the frame with a sigh once you shut the door, your knees suddenly weak.
Light on your feet, you follow the faint noise of the TV to find Yoongi in the living room with Planet Earth on at a barely audible volume. He glances at you, his mouth a flat line, then reaches for the remote to turn the sound up a few notches. You drop down on the couch next to him, and it’s silent for a moment, save for the calm narration and the crinkling plastic of him tearing open a bag of Turtle Chips.
“How’d it go?” he finally asks, voice monotone.
“It’s good,” you answer softly. “We’re good.” You fold your legs up under yourself and sneak a look at Yoongi out of the corner of your eye. You’re still a little pissed, but you also want advice. Damn him for knowing everything.
“Have you heard the term ‘demisexual’ before?”
Yoongi nods, still chewing as he replies. “Yeah. Like asexual spectrum, right?”
You shrug. “I guess. It’s new to me.”
He shoves a few more chips in his mouth before he continues. “Is that what your Subway Boy is?”
“I think so, yeah.”
There’s a long pause while you watch penguins march across the screen, and you think that might be the end of it. Then Yoongi clears his throat. “You know, I’m somewhere in there too. Not completely asexual, but definitely not… not.”
Your eyes widen. “Really?”
Yoongi snorts. “Don’t act so shocked. These walls aren’t that thick.”
“Is Joon?”
He smirks, like you’ve just told a joke. “Decidedly not.”
“Oh.” You blink, trying to process. “How do you deal with it?”
Yoongi makes a face, like he’s never thought about it before. “We just communicate, I guess. Be respectful even when we don’t necessarily understand. And, like, Namjoon watches porn, and surprisingly reads quite a bit of erotica—”
“Okay, okay,” you cut him off. “I don’t need all the details.”
He huffs a dry laugh at your discomfort. “It’s not always easy, sometimes it’s frustrating for both of us. But we make it work. We love each other.”
You chew a little at the inside of your cheek, and then you can’t hold in the question any longer. “Is it weird that the idea doesn’t bother me? Jimin said it was a huge issue with his ex. Like, does that make me on the… spectrum?”
Yoongi shrugs. “I mean, you might be? But not necessarily? I don’t know, sex matters different amounts to everyone. Some people don’t mind not having it that often. You don’t have to put a label on it unless you want to, you know?”
“Yeah, makes sense.” You nod slowly as you digest the idea. “Thanks, Yoongi. I appreciate the education.”
His only answer at first is a noncommittal hum, and then he points a finger at the few inches of wine in the bottle you left sitting on the coffee table. “Gonna finish that?”
“It’s all yours,” you say. “Consider it atonement for going to first base on the couch.”
Yoongi grabs the bottle by the neck and immediately drains it. “Apology accepted,” he grunts as he sets it back down. “And I’m sorry I snapped at you.” He extends his bag of chips in your direction and you happily reach in for the biggest handful you can manage.
~*~
During your next movie night, Jimin can’t keep his hands to himself.
They pet up your thighs, your legs draped over his, then slide up to your hips, fingertips tracing patterns over the waistband of your leggings and toying at the hem of your shirt.
His mouth has a similar problem: he leans in to press kisses along the line of your jaw, then down the slope of your neck, sucking delicately at the spot that makes your nipples tighten and sends a shiver through you.
“You’re missing the movie,” you remark, raking a hand through his peachy-pink hair, shadowed at the roots where his natural color has started to grow in. He’s typically good about keeping himself restrained until the credits roll, but you’re barely halfway through Pride & Prejudice, haven’t even cracked a second bottle yet.
“Fuck the movie,” he growls against your skin, and you bite back a whimper when his teeth scrape over your neck. You can’t ignore the way your core is starting to ache from his insistent mouth.
His lips find yours again, and you giggle softly into him. “You’re in a mood.”
“Just been thinking about you,” he murmurs between kisses. It surprises you a little when he suddenly pulls back so he can look you in the eyes. “Should we— do you want to go to my room?”
The air hangs still and heavy between you, and you worry at your bottom lip for a moment. “Are you sure?” When he nods, dark brown eyes blinking up at you, your mouth turns up at the corner. “I’d rather we not traumatize any more roommates if we can help it.”
You lean over to pause the movie before sliding off his lap and getting to your feet, and then you reach your hands out for his and pull him up next to you. “Come on.”
Jimin’s bedroom is so perfectly him that it relaxes you, feather-soft comfort every time you step inside. His bed isn’t made, because it never is, the thick white duvet pushed down on one side where he stumbled out from beneath it this morning. He keeps it dark, blackout curtains drawn to support his night owl lifestyle, and the room is bathed in the warm glow of fairy lights he’s strung up along the ceiling. A myriad of posters and art prints and polaroids are taped to the walls, some beautiful, others sentimental— he even managed to coax you into tearing a few of his favorites out of your sketchbook. You still don’t think they’re anything special, but nevertheless, it makes your heart squeeze in your chest to see them on display with everything else. Like they belong here in this room, like you do too.
The door clicks as it shuts behind him, and then his mouth is on yours again, kissing you dizzy while he backs you up until your knees hit the edge of the bed. He guides you to lay down, and his hand slips beneath you to drag you up the bed with him as he crawls over you.
His hands come up to tug at your shirt. “Can I take this off?” he breathes.
You nod, staring up at him and not quite able to believe any of this is real. “You can do anything you want to me.” With a smile, he lifts the hem of your shirt, and you sit up a little so he can pull it the rest of the way off.
“God, you’re beautiful,” Jimin murmurs against your skin as he kisses down your neck, over your collarbones, then down between the valley of your breasts. His hands slip down to palm at your tits, squeezing gently, and he mouths at the stiff peaks of your nipples over the thin fabric of your bralette. You untangle briefly, only for as long as it takes to get the lacy thing off of you entirely and tossed over the edge of the bed.
You shiver a little as the air hits your bare skin, and then the warmth of his body covers you again, and he ducks down to close his mouth over your nipple and suck. The plush softness of his lips and the firm suction combined are enough to make your eyes roll back, and your spine arches up beneath him when he drags his tongue in a circle over the sensitive bud.
“Shit,” you groan. Your hands fist in the fabric of his shirt, and it feels like your only tether to reality.
It’s easy to believe it’s the waiting, the anticipation of this moment, that makes every little touch light you up like a live wire now. But something tells you it will always feel like this.
While his lips shift to your other breast, one hand slides down to cup your clothed pussy, rubbing gentle friction into your center. You circle your hips to press yourself against the flat of his palm, sighing at the brush of indirect contact and the heat that thrums through you from the pressure on your clit.
You feel Jimin’s weight shift on the mattress as he kneels next to you, and his lips find yours again at the same time his hand slips into your leggings, two fingers tracing the seam of your panties to make you whine softly. If he couldn’t tell before, he must be able to now: how wet you are, enough to drench the lacy fabric so it clings to your cunt, dripping arousal to show how badly you want him.
He’s surprisingly forceful when he tugs the damp fabric to the side, but so gentle again as he slips one finger and then a second into your tight heat. Your mouth drops open as he curls them up to rub at your g-spot, stroking into you over and over while your cunt squeezes tight around him.
Your head drops back on the pillow and you groan. “Oh, fuck, Jimin.”
You can hear how soaked your pussy is as he pumps into you, and the wet squelch of his fingers working inside you would make you shy if it didn’t feel so overwhelmingly perfect. The pleasure edges your breathing with soft sounds, and Jimin swallows them when he kisses you again.
He shifts slightly for a better angle and then you feel the heel of his palm grind down against your clit. It’s enough to make your hips buck up under him with every press of his hand, his insistent touch shooting sparks of arousal through you.
It’s been so long since anyone has touched you, and you’ve wanted this with him so badly for so long, but even still, it surprises you how quickly he can bring you to the edge.
“Jimin,” you break the kiss to gasp against his mouth, unable to believe how close you already are. Close enough that all you can do is cling, to any part of him you can reach: his hair, his shoulders, the fabric of his shirt. “Jimin, Jimin, fuck.”
“Look so fuckin’ good like this,” he groans, and he says the next part softer, like it’s just for him. “My girl looks so pretty on my fingers.”
The pace of his movements doesn’t falter, nor does the heavy weight of his palm as he ducks down to capture your nipple in his mouth again. Your pussy pulses around him, sucking him in to the last knuckle with each thrust of his hand, and your nails dig desperately into his forearm as you feel your orgasm crest.
His teeth graze lightly over the tight bud of your breast, and it’s enough. With a final whine, the arousal that’s been coiling inside you snaps, and your back arches up off the bed as you come hard on his fingers.
Jimin’s fingers keep stroking you through it, the flat of his palm rubbing rough circles against your clit again and again and again and it feels like you might never stop coming. You moan as it rolls over you, wave after wave, until his touch is so overwhelming that you have to pull your trembling thighs together, and he finally relents.
Spent, your body sinks heavy into the bed, and you can’t help the dazed giggle that flutters out as afterglow starts to bloom behind your ribs.
Jimin hovers over you, dropped down onto his forearms, full lips pressing indiscriminately to your flushed skin, all over. You snake a hand through his hair to pull his mouth up to yours, and he kisses you slow and deep.
When you break apart, you tip your forehead to his. “Can I touch you?” you ask, still a little breathless.
“Please,” he murmurs, lips brushing against yours again before he pulls away with a small, embarrassed smile. “My pants hurt.”
You sit up on your knees and he does too, and you bite down on your lip as you reach for the hem of his shirt. He helps you pull it over his head, and then there he is, beautiful as ever. Familiar, yet somehow all new.
Jimin shivers and whines when your hands run across the bare skin of his chest, teasing over his soft brown nipples before starting to trace a path down to his stomach. You lean in to kiss him, and he outright groans into your mouth when your fingertips tease along the band of his boxers that peeks out over his jeans. You gently bring your palms to his hips to guide him, and he’s pliant for you, shifting backwards at your suggestion until he’s seated, leaned back against the headboard.
Your hands shake slightly as you unbutton and push down his jeans, and you hear him exhale a ragged sigh of relief. He’s so hard, you can understand why the tight denim must have been painful: his dick is still straining even now, a thick outline pressed into the fabric of his underwear, and there’s a dark patch that clings to his tip where he’s started to leak precum.
You tug his boxers down with enough force that his length smacks heavy against his stomach, and he makes a strangled noise in response, eyes squeezing shut. His hips jerk violently beneath you, and your jaw goes slack as you watch his cock twitch, and keep twitching, until a steady pool of milky gloss has leaked out over his stomach.
“Shit,” Jimin hisses as he comes practically untouched, and he gasps for air to try to speak. “Fuck fuck fuck— ‘msorry, thought I could—”
You can see him starting to spiral, can feel the panic starting to heat up inside his body, so you take his face in both of your hands. “Jimin.”
“This has never happened before— fuck, I don’t— this is so—”
“Jimin.” When you say his name again, firmer this time, he goes quiet, his eyes still shut tight. “Look at me,” you murmur, and he does, lashes slow-blinking open. “It’s okay. Okay?” Your gaze searches his, trying to convince him. “I like everything about you. Everything you do. You’re perfect.”
Clearly trying to steady his breathing, his chest shudders with effort, and you gently circle your thumb at the hinge of his jaw. He makes a soft noise as his eyelids drop shut again, his cheek pressing into your hand, letting you carry a little bit more of his weight.
It’s quiet for a moment, and his voice is unsure when he speaks. “There’s tissues… in the—”
“Can I take care of it?” you interrupt to ask, your voice low. His eyes blink open again to look at you, and a dark glint flickers there as the unsaid meaning of your question washes over him.
“Y-yeah.”
You take your time moving down the bed to settle between Jimin’s thighs, and you stare up at him, waiting for any indication that he wants you to stop or doesn’t feel comfortable. But he just swallows hard, his adam’s apple jerking in his throat, and nods.
Leaning down, you drag your tongue in steady, long strokes over the flat plane of his stomach to lick the mess up.
As you get the last of it, you’re surprised to feel his hand cup the back of your head. You don’t resist when he pulls you up for a kiss, then licks into your mouth to taste himself, the salt and slick of his cum sliding between your tongues.
When you break apart to swallow, Jimin’s voice is a whisper. “That okay?”
You nod, unable to bite back your smile. “You’re… really fucking hot.”
He smirks as he finds your lips again. “So are you.” The next kiss is sweeter, and then he pulls back. “If you want, we can keep— or I can go down— I don’t want—” He can’t finish any of his half-started thoughts, and you smile, lovingly running your palms over his thighs, back and forth. 
You want him so badly, more than anything, but you try to breathe through it. You can see the wheels spinning in his head, that self-critical flash in his eyes, the same furrow in his brow that creases when he gets frustrated with himself.
“I’m not saying no because I don’t want you,” you preface. “But I just don’t want you to feel stressed or get in your head about it. I want it to feel good, and I’m in no rush. Next time, okay?” 
His lips are still a little pouted, but he nods, and you lean in to sling your arms around his neck. “C’mere.”
You tug him down to the mattress, and your half-naked bodies fit together like puzzle pieces, hands tracing gentle patterns over bare skin as you kiss.
When you eventually end up with your cheek pressed to his chest, you listen to the sound of his heartbeat settling, his breathing evening out. You speak softly in the quiet of his room. “My roommate’s doing an exhibition on Friday. Will you come with me? I’ve been promised there will be free booze.”
Jimin tightens his grip on your waist, his voice slurring like he’s half-asleep. “Mmm, my favorite person and my favorite thing.” There’s a pause, and he sighs. “That sounded bad. Promise I'm not an alcoholic.”
“I know,” you laugh, dragging your lips over his collarbone, then grunting a little noise of frustration as reality starts to set in. “I have class early tomorrow. I should go before I fall asleep here.”
He whines his disapproval, but when you glance up you can see the fight going out of him, his eyelids starting to flutter closed. You lean up for one, two, three more kisses before you force yourself out of bed to find your bra and your shirt. “I’ll see you Friday?”
“Mmkay.” He inhales deep, like he’s coming up for air. “Text me when you make it home safe?”
“I will,” you promise, and you do.
~*~
Namjoon’s exhibition is laughably fancy for what really just ends up being a room full of gay, overdressed art students. The ridiculous finger foods disappear in minutes— all the broke grad school kids came hungry— but you and Jimin gladly hover around the table of champagne flutes instead, giggles sparkling between you like the bubbles that fizz in your glasses.
You’ve been trying to drag him away to actually take in the art, but he keeps necking his drinks. “You’re supposed to sip it, you demon!” you chide with a laugh as he does it again, picking up a fresh glass and throwing all of it back in one gulp.
He smirks slightly as he shakes his head. “It’s more fun this way. Try it.”
You roll your eyes, hiding the grin that threatens to stretch over your face in the rim of your drink before following suit. He’s not wrong: a rush of warmth creeps up your neck as you swallow, the world softening around you, and it’s made sweeter by the kiss Jimin leans in for. When he pulls back you can see his face is flushing, too.
“Come on, Mr. Park,” you murmur, your free hand intertwining with his as you set the empty glass down and retrieve another. “Take me on a tour.”
Jimin grabs another flute too and then you’re off, and he actually manages to drink this one slowly as you weave through the gallery, the click of your footsteps underscoring the gentle classical music that floats through the speakers. You lean into Jimin in comfortable silence as you take in each art piece, sipping delicately at your champagne, occasionally hooking your chin over his shoulder just for the thrill of being close to him.
“These are all beautiful,” he hums appreciatively as you stand in front of a wide, impressionist landscape, swirls of color that shift into shapes when you step far enough away, but dissolve into unidentifiable blobs of thick-textured paint up close. “Namjoon did a really good job curating.”
“Mm-hmm,” you nod, but your eyes are on Jimin and everything else pales in comparison. He’s dressed up for the occasion, tight black jeans and a white button-down with a leather jacket thrown on over top. His hair is styled, pretty pink strands pushed back off his forehead, and his asymmetrical silver earrings glimmer in the low lighting. The result is so stunning you’ve had a hard time focusing on anything but him tonight.
A thought that’s been running through your mind all evening resurfaces again as you swallow the last of your glass of champagne.
“They should put you in a gallery.” You didn’t necessarily plan to say the thought out loud, but say it you do. Jimin quirks an eyebrow and you decide to double down. “But not here. Somewhere better.”
“The Met?” he guesses, teasing.
“The Louvre,” you counter, and he outright laughs, his head tipping back.
“The Louvre?!”
“You heard me,” you giggle, your body pressed against his side. “You’re art.”
Releasing your hand, he wraps his free arm around you to pull you into his chest, the smile still lingering over his face. “And you,” he murmurs, “are drunk.”
“Doesn’t mean I don’t mean it.” Your voice is muffled slightly as you speak into his collarbone.
You tilt your head up for a kiss, and it seems to surprise both of you how quickly the atmosphere changes. It might be the more-than-several glasses of champagne to blame, or the fact that you’ve found yourselves in a corner, hidden away from the rest of the exhibition’s patrons, but the soft spark that ignites between you quickly grows into a licking flame at the touch of your lips. It’s heat-blush passion as your mouths move against each other, and you’re trying to keep quiet despite the weight of it, heavy in your core, this shared, unspoken need.
“Jimin,” you breathe into him, overwhelmed by all that he is.
He shifts, nosing at your jawline as he speaks into your ear. “Do you want to go somewhere?”
The suggestion makes you a little unsteady on your feet, your high heels threatening to topple over, and he catches you with a hand to your waist when you falter. “Like, somewhere here?”
“Too far to go all the way home,” he purrs, the hand on your body squeezing gently. “And you look too good.”
Your head swims as he kisses you again, and he pries the empty glass out of your hand, setting it down on the nearest table with his. A hand returns to the small of your back, then slips lower, cupping your ass through the fabric of your black dress. His mouth paints a smile over yours, and you grab his wrist. “Follow me.”
Stumbling your way through the gallery, trading laughs under your breath like confidants and kisses when no one is looking, you lead him back to the coat check closet at the front, thankfully left vacant by whichever freshman had been roped in to the thankless job. With a final glance over your shoulder to make sure you’re unseen, you push the door open and tug Jimin inside after you.
As soon as the coat check door closes again, he has you pressed against it, his tongue slipping hungrily into your mouth. His hands skirt up the curve of your hips as he slots a thigh between your legs, firmly pushing up the hem of your dress to grind into your clothed center.
You both freeze where you are at the sound of a moan, one that very distinctly does not come from either of you.
Jimin tries and fails to suppress a nervous laugh. Unable to make out anything in the dark, you reach your hand out, smacking aimlessly at the wall next to you until you find a lightswitch and flip it on.
“What the fu—” The man who made the noise in question flings a hand over his face at the sudden intrusive wash of fluorescents, but you’d know him from his voice alone. Kim Taehyung still has one hand gripped tight to the metal bar of a coat rack, back arched and legs spread for whoever his latest victim is, with his pants and boxers shoved down to his ankles.
Before your alcohol-soaked brain can put together a smug comment about how Taehyung needs to get his ass eaten at home like a normal human, Jimin’s voice surprises you.
“Hobi?”
You clap a hand over your mouth as you realize the man on his knees, pulling his tongue off Taehyung’s rim with a look of utter confusion, is none other than Jung Hoseok. His eyes are wide as dinner plates as his head snaps up to take the two of you in.
“Jimin?!”
“Oh my god.” You start to laugh so hard your knees buckle, and Jimin has to wrap his arms around you to keep you upright. “How the fuck did you two even meet?!”
“Do we really need to have this discussion now?!” Taehyung growls, and it only makes you laugh harder.
“Come on, come on—” Jimin is collapsing into giggles himself as he fumbles for the handle behind you. He simultaneously attempts to pull you off the door so he can swing it open. “Let’s leave them to it.”
You smack the lights off again as you make your escape, Jimin’s grip still hugging tight around your waist as you laugh until your lungs nearly give out. The lobby is thankfully empty, all the attendees pressed deeper into the gallery, so you loop your arms over his shoulders as you recover and pull his mouth back down to yours, unable to stop yourself.
“Let me take you home,” you manage to say in the space between kisses. Your tongue feels heavy when you speak; his is champagne-sweet. “Joon and Yoongi will be here for a while.”
Jimin’s agreement hums, buzzing on your lips. “Wanna take the train?”
You’re grateful the subway car you stumble into is empty, because the pull of Jimin’s mouth is too magnetic to be ignored. You don’t think you could stop kissing him if you tried.
It’s practically a race back to your apartment once you emerge from the station, partially to get out of the cold night air, though you hardly feel it with Jimin’s jacket slung over your shoulders and your body flushed hot from alcohol and desire. As you climb the four flights to your walk-up, both of you giggling and gripping tight to the banister, the spiral of the stairs sends your world spinning. You feel dizzy-drunk on wine and laughter and lust alike, and maybe something more. Something you don’t have words for yet.
It takes you three tries to get your keys in the door, and when you finally manage to get it open, you kick your shoes off and make a beeline for your bedroom, dragging Jimin along after you, hand-in-hand. Thankfully he has the foresight to remember to shut the door behind you, because all you can think about is him: the rich musk of his cologne, the taste of his tongue, the warm blush of his skin under your palms.
The leather jacket hits the floor and you step over it, walking backwards as he licks into your open mouth, shameless.
You nearly fall over when you bump up against the bed and almost lose your balance, and then you reach for the buttons of his shirt at the same time he goes for your dress. The two of you laugh your frustrations against each other as your arms tangle and get in the way.
“You first!” you insist, and he relents, lets you unbutton the starched white fabric of his button-down so he can shrug out of it. Your fingers move to undo his belt and then he takes over, impressively coordinated enough to be able to kiss you while kicking his jeans the rest of the way off, stripped down now to his black boxer-briefs. He pulls your dress up over your head, and then your barely-clothed bodies press together all the way down, the ache in your core now an undeniable throb.
Jimin takes your face in his hands and kisses you again, and you slip one hand between your hips and his to palm at him, earning an appreciative hiss. You rub at him over the front of his briefs, teasing, then dip your touch beneath his waistband.
His cock hangs heavy between his legs, but he’s not quite hard yet, maybe from the cold, so you take him in your hand and start to pump. For fear of too much dry friction you try to go slow, and he groans into your mouth as you twist your wrist a little to circle your thumb over his frenulum.
He buries his face in your neck, and you can feel the heat of his embarrassment bloom against your skin. “Sorry— gimme a second.”
Tilting your head, you press a kiss to his temple. “Don’t apologize. D’you wanna try laying down?”
When he nods, you release your grip on him so he can sink down onto the bed, crawling backwards up to the pillows. Knelt down on the mattress, you settle in the space he makes for you, thighs spread and knees tipped open, and you push his briefs down enough to free all of him.
You hook your thumb and index finger under the head of his dick to pull it flush against his stomach, allowing you better access to drag your tongue in little kitten licks up his shaft. Your other hand moves to massage gently at his balls as you take his tip into your mouth and let it bulge against your cheek, let him slip against the soft wall there to make saliva pool on your tongue, sloppy on purpose.
It’s still not working, not really, and when your gaze flits up to him again, Jimin’s face is pulled into a grimace. Heat rushes up your neck, and you pull your mouth off him and immediately right yourself. You shift backwards a little on your knees as your pulse starts to race. Does he not want this? Did you misread some sign, or push him too far?
Jimin must be able to read the look in your eyes, because he groans as he presses his face into his hands. “It’s not you. Think I drank too much, I don’t— i-it feels good, I—it just—”
You’re not exactly sober yourself. The receding white noise of panic makes it hard to think, hard to know what to say. “I-it’s okay. It’s okay.”
“I just—” he tries again. “I really want to do this, I don’t know why— it’s fucking embarrassing.” The blankets muffle the sound as his palms smack flat against the bed on either side of him in clear frustration. You move out from between his legs, still trying to catch up, and a muscle in his jaw jumps as he pulls his boxer-briefs back over himself.
“Jimin,” you murmur. The bed creaks when you shift to lay next to him, to tuck into his side, and you reach up to run a hand through his hair, a little sticky with the product holding it in place. An anxious, thrumming quiet settles over both of you as his eyes flutter closed.
The words finally come to you in the silence; you can only hope they’ll reach him. “I had so much fun with you tonight. That doesn’t go away.” The crease between his brows softens a little, so you keep talking. “It’s not your only chance, okay? I’m not leaving. I’m staying right here.” Your free hand slips into his on the bed next to you. “And I want you with me.”
He sniffs a little, so quiet you nearly miss it, then turns in towards you. Your noses bump together and your mouth turns up at the corners as you continue. “It’s late, and I… can’t promise there isn’t more ass-eating waiting for you at home. Do you want to sleep here?”
Jimin’s eyes blink open, glassy, and then he nods.
“Come on,” you say softly, sitting up and tugging on your still-joined hands. “How about we shower?”
In the bathroom, you run the water scalding hot, and when you both step in you nudge Jimin forward to stand under it first, then press against him from behind. Your hands wrap around his waist to slide over his stomach as you tilt up to reach his ear when you speak. “This okay?”
He nods, hums a little, and you move your hands up over the whole of his body. Hard lines and soft curves, a work of art you know so well, you can see it when you close your eyes as you map his skin with your fingertips. You nuzzle into the place where his neck and shoulder meet, then press a kiss there. “I’m right here,” you say again, not even sure if he hears you.
But his head turns, and you feel one of his hands slide over yours on his chest. “Will you wash my hair?” he asks softly, and you tip forward to bring your mouth to his, convinced you’d do anything he asked of you.
It’s intimate, the way you take your time running shampoo and then conditioner through his silky pink strands, dragging your nails over his scalp and applying gentle pressure that makes him sigh prettily in response. Jimin steps further under the showerhead both times to rinse the product out, and if a few tears slip down his cheeks, they’re lost to the spray of the water where you can’t tell the difference.
But he does manage the ghost of a smile when you reach to grab your washcloth and he gets there first. “Your turn.”
Once your body and then his are scrubbed and rinsed clean, you shut the water off and grab thick, fluffy towels that you dry off and wrap up in. In the dim light of your room, you pull on an oversized t-shirt and boyshorts, then dig out a pair of sweatpants from your dresser. They’re fairly baggy on you, but they fit Jimin perfectly, and the image of him in something of yours makes your heart squeeze tight in your chest.
You run two glasses under the kitchen tap that you set out to ward off any potential hangovers, and you even manage to find a spare toothbrush for him to use. When he emerges from the bathroom again, still absentmindedly toweling his damp hair, you’re sitting on the bed with your feet tucked under you.
“Do you want to watch something?” you offer gently.
He shakes his head as he stifles a yawn. “‘Mtired. Think I just wanna sleep.”
You pat the bedspread next to you, an invitation. “Then let’s sleep.”
Under the covers, you curl up together, soft and warm from the shower, scented lavender and mint from your body wash and toothpaste. Jimin’s legs tangle with yours, an arm wrapping over your waist, and you press your cheek against the hard plane of his chest with a small sigh.
You listen as his breathing slows, each inhale a little further apart from the last, to the point where you think he’s fallen asleep. You feel yourself start to follow after him, and the last thing you hear before you’re dragged all the way down is Jimin inhaling deep, then mumbling softly into your hair. “Thank you. For everything.”
~*~
Light streams in between the cracks of the window blinds, painting warm shapes over your eyelids that gently wake you. You sigh and stretch as you slowly come all the way up from dreaming, your eyes still heavy-lidded. When you roll over with a soft grunt, you find Jimin fast asleep there, his face smushed into the pillow, one arm slung lazily over you.
The corner of your mouth pulls up, and you have to fight the urge to dot kisses all over his face, deciding to let him sleep instead. It takes some maneuvering, but you manage to roll out from under his arm without waking him and slip quietly out of bed, easing the bedroom door closed behind you.
It’s early, and the apartment is still, washed in morning gleam and the gentle hum of New York City traffic on the streets outside.
You stumble into the kitchen with a stifled yawn, swinging open the fridge and leaning down to retrieve a pack of bacon and the half-empty carton of eggs. Humming quietly to yourself, you dig a pan out and set it on the stove to heat.
Arms slide around your waist, making you jump a little before you melt back as Jimin nuzzles into the crook of your neck. You can feel his body through your t-shirt, still warm from sleep and bedsheets he must’ve only just crawled out from under.
Not quite graceful, you turn in his arms and loop yours around his neck to seek a kiss. “Good morning,” you murmur, your voice hoarse on your first spoken words of the day. “How are you feeling?”
Jimin’s mouth is still slurred from waking up when he answers. “‘Mgood. You look good.” His gaze roams down your body and back up, as if to take in your oversized shirt, your bare legs, your hair still messy from sleep. “So cute like this.”
You scrunch your nose slightly as you smile up at him. “Want breakfast?”
A heat starts to pool between your legs as his hands slide further down your back. He pushes your shirt up so he can grip your ass, the thin fabric of your underwear the only thing separating his skin from yours.
“In a bit.”
You can’t help but squeak when, in one swift move, he bends his knees and lifts you off the ground. Impulsively, your legs spread to wrap over his hips, thighs squeezing tight to hold on, and your arms cling around his neck as laughter flutters in your chest. Before you can act on the urge to bury your face in his shoulder, his mouth finds yours again, and the way he kisses you, hungry and deep, makes nothing else in the world matter.
He carries you back to bed, nudging open the door he didn’t quite close all the way with his shoulder, then using a foot to push it shut again. Your muscles unclench when he sits down with you in his lap, and you unwrap your legs from around him, your knees sinking soft into the bed.
You can’t quite shake the thoughts of the night before. “Jimin,” you start, “we don’t have to do this if you don’t—”
“Want to,” his voice is low, ragged edges from sleep. “Doing it ‘cause I want to. I want you. Do you want me?”
You nod, leaning back to look at him, your arms still twined over his neck. “More than anything.”
There’s no rush this time as he shifts backwards up the bed and you crawl over him to settle into his lap again. No tension that’s been building all night, no alcohol buzzing in your systems, no urgency. Just your bodies, half-dressed in sleep clothes, intertwining like they were made to fit together.
Your kisses are sweet and unhurried as Jimin’s hands slip beneath your oversized t-shirt, delicate fingers tracing up your waist. He cups your breasts in his palms, squeezing gently as he licks into your mouth. When he rolls a nipple between his fingers, your breath hitches, sparks of arousal shooting all the way down to your toes. A weight blossoms in your core as you reach for the hem of your shirt to pull it over your head, and you shiver a little in the morning air.
“Beautiful,” Jimin says quietly, reverently, and you take his face in your hands.
“You are too,” you murmur, your eyes searching his. “So beautiful.” Your hands slip down his body as he kisses you again, your fingertips outlining the contours of his chest, gently brushing over his nipples to make him groan into your mouth.
Jimin’s hands come to rest at the curve of your hips as your mouths move together, where he teases his touch under the band of your boyshorts. He pulls back just far enough to ask, “Can I take these off?” and you nod.
You shimmy the thin fabric down your thighs, dropping onto your ass with a laugh so he can tug them the rest of the way off, one ankle at a time. As you sit up on your knees again, his hands come to grip your thighs, and he shifts lower on the bed until he’s laying flat on his back next to you.
“Wanna eat you out,” he murmurs softly.
“Yeah?” You bite down on a small smile.
He hums. “Can I— will you please, uh… sit on my face?”
You can’t help but giggle. No one has ever asked so politely. “Yeah, okay.”
It’s slow, languid, the way his full lips close delicately around your clit when you settle over him, how he alternates with lazy passes of his tongue, not unlike the way he kisses you. The pleasure pulls your spine arched and your head tips back, palms pressing flat to the bed beneath you.
“Jimin,” you gasp, “baby, feels so fucking good.”
His tongue is heavy as it drags down your folds, thick when he sinks it into your cunt to taste the slick arousal that pours out of you and drips down his chin. Your hips rock into his mouth, his nose inadvertently bumping against your clit as he licks you like he doesn’t want to waste a drop. Your walls cling tight, crammed up full of him.
With a slurp and a gasp for breath, he withdraws, his tongue made hot from being buried inside of you, trailing wet warmth as he licks back up your pussy to lap at your clit again. Your arms threaten to give out when he sucks the sensitive bud into his mouth, lips pulsing an insistent rhythm that makes you moan and writhe above him.
“Jimin, Jimin.” The pleasure is decadent, thick, wine and honey, made sweeter by the beautiful boy pressed between your thighs. Emotion bubbles up inside of you to twist with your pleasure, and you tighten a hand in his rose-blush hair as you moan again, nearly a sob this time, a dam breaking.
Jimin hums against you, fingertips digging into the soft skin of your thighs, like he can tell you’re at the edge without you having to say a word, and it’s enough to send you tumbling over it.
“Oh fuck baby, yes, fuck.” Your toes curl tight over the bedsheets as your pussy flutters, throbs, gushes. Your vision whites out as you come hard enough to make your thighs shake, hard enough that your stomach muscles tremble with the effort of holding you up. Jimin’s mouth works you through it, tongue stroking flat and slow to coax pulse after pulse out of you, until everything melts into shaky aftershocks and your thighs clench around him, over-sensitive.
He pulls back when you start to squirm, lips smacking wetly on a final kiss to your pussy, and heat flushes your face at the sound of it. Your limbs feel heavy as lead as you slip off from on top of him and collapse down onto the mattress with a floaty sigh, your pulse still thudding brightly in your ears.
You’re only distantly aware of the way the bed shifts as Jimin slides down next to you. You follow his touch on instinct, turning into him when he pulls you close and presses a kiss to your hairline. Heartbeat still slamming in your chest, mind hazy with morning orgasm glow, you hum contentedly as your eyes flutter open to find him palming at a thick bulge tenting his– well, your sweatpants.
“Looks like it’s cooperating today.” Jimin’s voice is equal parts relieved and embarrassed.
With a lazy smile, you hook a finger in his waistband, tugging playfully. “What do you want to do about it?”
He laughs hoarsely. “I would love to finally fuck you, if you’ll have me.”
“I don’t want anybody else.” The thought spills out before you can worry if it’s too soon to say it, but he just smiles and leans in to kiss you.
At Jimin’s guidance, you lay back against the pillows, a couple of which he grabs to slot under your hips. “There’s condoms in the nightstand,” you say softly, and anticipation thrums in your chest, twinning with your still-racing pulse as you watch him retrieve one, then step out of his sweatpants to roll it on.
He climbs back onto the bed to hover over you, and your breaths come shallow into each other’s mouths. You kiss quietly at the precipice of this moment, like you’re afraid it might not be real, a dream you could wake up from at any second.
“Thank you.” Jimin’s low voice sends a ripple through you. “For waiting for me.”
You press a hand to his cheek, your eyes trying to take all of him in at once. “It wasn’t waiting, Jimin. Really. I’ve loved every second with you. It doesn’t matter what we’re doing.”
“I’m so glad I met you,” he murmurs.
The head of his cock teases your entrance, and you spread your thighs wider, pulling your legs up towards your chest. Still sensitive from your first orgasm, you can’t bite back the moan that spills out of you as he sinks into your tight heat with a cock thick enough to split you open. “Fuck, Jimin.”
There’s a pause when he’s pressed all the way in, his body covering yours, your hands clutching at the broad sweep of his back. He exhales a soft, disbelieving laugh as he looks down to see himself buried in you to the hilt. “God, you’re so tight. Does it hurt?”
You shake your head— you’re so soaked from his tongue and your arousal that it all just feels like melting, a pulsating heat between your legs. When he presses another kiss to your lips, he circles his hips, and you both groan at the feeling.
Jimin’s hands grip your thighs as he shifts and starts to move, starts fucking into you with long, slow strokes that make your pussy flutter, as if to urge him in deeper.
“It’s good?” he checks in again, voice tight, clearly holding himself back.
“So good, baby,” you breathe, “please fuck me.” A smirk flashes over his mouth at your manners, so polite when you ask to take it, and then he snaps his hips into you and you keen. “Fuck, please, just like that.”
He does it again and again, hands pressing down on your thighs to keep you folded up under him as he fucks you. The angle is just right for the thick head of his cock to pound into your g-spot with every stroke, and your back arches as your walls grip tight to him.
Jimin echoes your gasps with his own, swearing under his breath as you squeeze around him. He’s thrusting deep-deep now, and your hips shove up towards him for all of it, your thighs trembling as you take every inch. You’re dripping down his length every time he pulls back, wet enough to soak the sheets beneath you.
The pleasure, the pressure as he fills you up is so overwhelming that your hands reach, clinging to anything they can find. A pillow, the bedsheets, the flexing muscles in his forearms. Your moans come unabashedly now, underscored by the slap of skin on skin, the thud of the bedframe knocking into the wall. “Jimin, Jimin, baby.”
“Yeah,” he pants, choked up like he’s close. “Love it when you say my name.”
You sit up a little, folded legs shifting to wrap over his hips, and your hands come to his face to pull his mouth down to yours. His movements stutter as you kiss him breathlessly, and the brush of your tongue over his must be just enough to make him come undone. With a grunt of effort, he thrusts hard into you one final time, and his shoulders shake as he fills up the condom.
You kiss him again and again, your lips pulled into a smile against his as you tangle a hand in his hair, made messy from sleep and sex. Jimin’s body weighs heavy on top of yours as he drops his head to your shoulder, breath coming in short heat-bursts over your collarbone.
“Fuck. Been a minute.” He presses a kiss there, another to your neck, a third to your jaw. “Do you want to keep going?”
Your eyes widen at the question. “I— can you?”
A soft flush paints color in his cheeks, and he’s suddenly a little shy. “Yeah, I can. If you want. Or we can stop.”
You wrap your arms over his shoulders, your noses bumping. “I kinda felt like I was getting close again.”
He smiles. “Then let me finish what I started.” There’s a bit of shuffling as he moves to the edge of the bed to remove and tie up the used condom, then reaches for the box to retrieve another.
As he tears open the foil and rolls it on, you watch and consider all of him. This body that you know from every angle, that you’ve studied like a textbook, that holds the boy who stepped onto the subway and changed your life and made it better. This body, made to be adored, to be respected and cherished and filled up with love. This body, chosen to be shared with you, to be held by you, to be near you.
That’s all you want, you realize as he rolls over, brown eyes blinking sweetly at you. This body, and all that it holds: the darkness and the light, the pain and the beauty, the soul that so perfectly fits with yours.
“Turn over for me?” he asks softly. “I want to spoon.”
This round is easier, slower, your bodies molding together, shaky from effort and sensitivity. You twist over your shoulder, tipping your head up for a kiss that turns into a shared gasp as he presses into you again. Your walls are swollen enough to be tender, and the stretch of him, the way he fills you up entirely, makes your eyes roll back.
As he starts to grind his hips into you, his hand snakes down between your thighs before you even have to ask. You hook a leg over his to allow him better access and gasp when his cock slides even deeper into you from the new angle.
“So good,” you manage as two of his fingers work circles into your clit, matching the same slow-stroke pace. His tongue slips into your mouth, and with his cock rubbing insistently against your front wall, it doesn’t take much. Pleasure overwhelms you in a hot rush as he so easily pulls you apart again.
“Jimin.” Your voice is nearly a whisper, your walls starting to pulse. Your head tips back against his shoulder as he fucks and rubs you through it, his hums of encouragement buzzing through your body, your hips shuddering. “Baby, oh god.”
Jimin’s strokes start to falter, and then he goes still, your cunt aftershock-fluttering around him as he comes again, groaning your name.
A brush of daylight through the blinds makes your eyes heavy, and they drop closed as you lean into him and breathe through the comedown. You don’t know how long you lay there like that until his kisses pull you back earthside, dotting over your forehead, cheeks, nose, jaw. You tilt your head up and he finally finds your lips again.
With a deep grunt of post-sex effort, he rolls over, leaning off the edge of the bed to deal with the second condom. A shiver dots up your spine at the loss of his body next to yours, and you tuck into his side when he lays down again, throwing an arm over his chest to better nuzzle into the crook of his neck. The heat of his palm makes you sigh as his hand rubs gentle circles against your back.
Something cracks open inside of you, warm like his touch, like the sunlight bleeding through the window. You can feel the rapid pace of his heartbeat under your hand, and it’s everything, all of him, that makes the words rise up in your throat, undeniable.
“Jimin,” you breathe, “I l—”
A loud bang on your bedroom door makes you flinch, and you roll over with a grimace as Yoongi shouts from the other side. “If you’re finished, just so you know, you left a fucking pan on the stove. Could’ve burnt the house down while you were in there deflowering each other.”
Your jaw drops open and Jimin’s eyes go wide, and you collapse against each other in a silent rush of laughter. You’re surprised when Yoongi’s voice comes back, a little softer this time. “Also I brought some bagels back from work. If you want any, better hurry before Namjoonie eats them all.”
The charged moment has passed, and the words sink back down inside of you. Making a promise to tell him soon, you wrap yourself tighter around Jimin’s side with a smile. “What do you think?”
He nods thoughtfully. “I’ll never say no to a bagel.”
“Come on then,” you murmur, tilting up for a final hit of affection. The kiss he leaves on your lips makes your heartbeat flutter, like the shudder of a subway car.
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svtoose · 12 days
Text
Return From Tour ft. Jeon Wonwoo
pairing: idol!wonwoo x gn!reader
word count: 640
A + F : not really angst, more like sadness and comforting from reader
warnings: established relationship, pet names, live together
summary: wonwoo finally returns from tour and is really in his feels. idol life is tough
a/n : I feel like 1k words is the sweet spot but idk
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ··
Today's the day you’ve been waiting for since three months ago. Today is the day Wonwoo returns from tour! Sure, you’re so proud of Seventeen's accomplishments but being away from your boyfriend for so long can be kind of tough.
You hadn’t really gotten much of the details on Wonwoo’s return, all you knew was that he’d be arriving at your shared apartment some time after 8:00 p.m.
While you were sitting on the living room couch, laptop in place and room temperature sleepy-time tea in hand, you heard the rattling of keys behind the front door which could only mean one things. Wonwoo is home.
You carefully lay the mug down on the coffee table as excitement courses through your veins. You’ve been counting down the days since his flight took off and now, he can finally be back in your arms. 
The door finally opens, revealing your boyfriend dressed in black sweats and his signature rimmed glasses. The second you make eye contact, you both speed toward each other in yearning. 
“Wonwoo,” You jolt in happiness, bringing your tall boyfriend into your arms for a quick kiss and strong embrace.
“Oh, baby. I missed you much.” His head was buried in the crook of your neck as you studied his uneven breathing.
“I missed you too, Won. Is everything okay?” You could tell something was off immediately. You slowly released him from the hug as he rolled in his carry on and shut the door while you kept his hand in yours.
You brought him over to sit on the couch next to you before he immediately broke down in tears. 
“Oh baby, it’s okay.” You pulled him into an embrace while you laid with your back again the arm rest. Wonwoo let everything out as you patiently waited while running your fingers through his locks. 
“I’m sorry… I know you were excited to see me,” his voice is low and raspy, but you can sense the guilt.
“You don’t have to apologize. I’m here for you, whenever you need me.” 
You continued to comfort your teary boyfriend, despite not knowing what plagued his mind. As his breaths became more even, you decided to inquire.
“Do you want to talk about it, Won? Maybe that’ll help.”
“Yeah….. I guess.” He whispered, still being held tight against your chest. You decided not to press as he stayed silent.
“Its just… being away for so long, being away from you, it’s exhausting. I get all of the stress but none of the love. At the end of every day, all I wanted was to fall asleep with the person I love but I couldn’t even do that. It was just really hard.”
“Aw. That’s really tough. I missed you too, so much, Won. I’m glad we’re together now.”
“Yeah me too. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there when you needed me.”
“You don’t have to apologize for that! You’re doing what you love an I understand that. ….That is if you still love it?”
He’s quiet for a few seconds, cuddling closer to you while you await his answer.
“I do love it. I do. I just forgot that sometimes, you know? It has some miserable sides to it, having to leave you being one, and that’s when I forget how much I love it.”
“I get it, baby. I’m here for you whenever you need me.” 
You continue to sit in silence, basking in each other’s presence like you haven’t been able to do in over three months.
After talking about things, Wonwoo seems to feel a lot better. You guys head to the bedroom together, getting ready for bed. Wonwoo tells you a bunch of stories from his tour while you brush your teeth and he un-packs his suitcase. You feel very relieved to see him back to his normal self and hope next tour will be easier for him.
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189 notes · View notes
ronearoundblindly · 3 months
Text
Hideout (3.1)
touch-starved!Nomad Steve Rogers x motel employee!Reader
Sensitive Boy, part I (see previous or series)
Summary: Steve surprises you with help at the perfect time.
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Warnings for light smut (I have to split this chapter or it's just suddenly twice as long as the last, but really there's just massage and an implied orgasm in this half. You know me: too many feels and too much development...) MINORS DNI. This series is 18+ only. If you are underage or simply enjoy lighter content, there is plenty for you to read on my Light Masterlist, but this post is not for you! WC 3.2k
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With so much on your mind, scaring the crap out of you is not difficult, so his strong hands hold you upright.
“Don’t do that,” you shriek, barely glancing at Steve’s face. You startled so suddenly your housekeeping cart is left rolling away at a snail’s pace.
“Sorry, I—“ long arms abandon you and reach to stop the bin “—it said on your website you were closed for renovations, and…”
You look him up and down. You were sure after he left two months ago that you’d never see him again. You’d gone too far. You’d pushed him too hard. He wasn’t ready.
Steve adjusts the strap over his shoulder. “I thought maybe I could help out…if you want?”
The last guests checked out a half-hour ago, and you readied to spend the whole week meticulously refreshing each room with your parents. The list of what needs done, however, doesn’t only include the motel. There’s a bunch you all had let slide up at the house. Help would…be extremely helpful actually.
Steve pulls a paper bag out of his knapsack. “Or I brought you some lunch if you just want a break or something.”
“It’s okay,” you rush out. “More than okay. Thank you, yes. We’d love—I’d love that.”
No one else can know it’s him-him there though. You’ll have to think of a way to keep your parents and St-‘Grant’ as far apart as possible, and how long you can manage that is…questionable.
If Steve’s not worried though, you’re okay.
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Turns out, keeping your family up at the house is easy. Your mom shouts down the phone with relief that she can tackle the fridge, and you hear your dad mumble something about ‘the garage in daylight.’ You can enjoy a sandwich in the office with Steve in peace, explaining what all needs done before the electricians show up Friday afternoon.
The closure hasn’t been planned for a long time—not even before Steve and ‘Tom’s’ last visit—hence why you just painted Room 8, 5, 2, and 1 since March, but doing all those is how you and your parents really noticed that the light fixtures from the ‘90s were not only dated but very worn and that the same color layered over and over again for twenty years was, well, getting old.
Warmer months are better for the work. Pipes won’t freeze while you air out paint fumes, etc. The week after the gigantic, city festivities of Independence Day is notoriously dead. Since there were no reservations this stretch as of April, the family jumped at the chance to fix it all in one big, daunting go.
Saying you’d looked forward to this is a wild overstatement. You’ll be glad when it’s finished, and that’s the bulk of your excitement.
With his assistance though? Hope soars.
Steve will help you take down the sconces, the hanging lamps, and the panels above the vanities, then you both can—
“Where’s the paint?”
He’s very intense with the gameplan. Three guesses why.
“Dad’s gonna pick it up today. Probably. I’ll text him.” You whip out your cell again. “We didn’t think we’d get that far by evening.”
Steve nods.
“We also need to move all the furniture away from the walls and drape plastic to protect the carpet. Oh, and put tape along the trim and doorframes, ya know.”
Steve nods again. He wads up the wrapping from his sandwich and casually asks, “are all the doors open?”
You only just get your finger in the air to point at the desk.
“Master key is—“
But Steve is observant and has clocked everything about his surroundings each time he’s stayed, apparently. He stretches over to the wall beyond the counter, snatches the (correct) unmarked key, and heads out the door.
The service bell rings gently to emphasize the conversation is over.
All furniture in every room is pulled away by the time you finish sanitizing the one guest room he interrupted.
He asks where you keep the ladder, not that he’ll need it, but you will for reaching some of the lights.
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You don’t know whether to be in awe of or exhausted by his efficiency.
He’s rigid and militant—go figure—until these few moments he suddenly can’t be.
As you toss plastic over the last bed to move, Steve yanks that sucker across the floor so fast, you roll off. His eyes are saucers as he apologizes, but you get the giggles and pick yourself up.
His fingers can’t separate thin layers of the plastic at one point, and he throws a minor fit until three rip apart together. Steve frowns at you and grumbles that he’s only ever used cloth for this before. It seems to take everything in his power not to say “back in my day,” but you can read between the lines.
Years of crusted paint makes the removal of some fixtures tricky.
Steve rips out one stripped screw with needle nose pliers, squeaks in alarm at the hole left behind, and then quietly asks if you have patch paste.
You call your dad before he’s left to buy paint. He adds spackling to the list.
The closest Steve comes to telling you anything specifically about himself is when you struggle with a stuck bolt.
“Just a little trick I learned when I was—“ Steve wraps his big hand around yours to pull the wrench instead of push from the other direction “—smaller.” He huffs out a laugh, adding, “when I couldn’t, ya know, ‘put my weight into it’ because a feather could’a knocked me over.”
As you relish the simple contact of his fingers, you smile, too.
“Hmm. I heard you got into back alley scrapes.”
“If you heard that I won any of those, you were lied to.” He patiently waits for you to finish removing the bolt before he pries the aged metal and glass away from the old paint it’s stuck in. Steve sighs dramatically.
“Shoddy education these days…”
“I…” You tap his bicep with the claws of the wrench. “I can’t argue with that. We hear only what they tell us about…heroes.”
You should have known he’d shut down at that word, but it’s the truth. Even with him right in front of you, the only things you know about Steve Rogers are from books, newspapers, and the internet. At face value—looking directly into the face of this man—all of what you’ve been told is hogwash. It’s insufficient. It barely covers 1% of who this man is.
He teaches you tricks of the weak man’s trade because it helped him once, too. Today, he’s friendly. Not that he was unfriendly before, but Steve is so reserved he never reference the past, in general, i.e. that there was a past existence of like the planet much less him.
It’s the number one rule of Fight Club: you don’t talk about Fight Club.
If there was ever a real fight club, it’s the Avengers.
You have no official rules for what this is between you. You don’t have to to know that is the most important one. You do not talk about Fight Club. Steve isn’t afraid of silence, that much is clear, but he isn’t a fan. He tries—he is trying—to connect and relate. He can’t be a man of the people, however, if he can’t talk to the people. 
It’s important: connection. You know with every fiber of your being that Steve deserves it, but even with unlimited, super-human strength, he cannot get himself out from between this rock and that hard place.
You do not talk about Fight Club, especially when you’ve been kicked out of Fight Club.
Today, though, he’s a little different, a little softer. Perhaps it’s knowing there are no other people in the building, perhaps he is truly more comfortable with you, but either way, Steve is not flat or off-putting.
His organized persona, his focus on the work, his indirect interactions and practical touch; they all fit here while he has a project. It’s the closest he can be to his old self, maybe even his real self, without mentioning the past—the fighting past—at all.
“You’re really good company,” you tell Steve, “even when you make holes in the walls.”
He tilts his head down and blushes. He shrugs as he takes the sconce out to the dumpster. Although he didn’t say it, you hope this is okay.
Either way, you relish it. The help. The touch. The silence. All of it.
You relish Steve.
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Your dad brings by the paint, spackling, and a surprise of pizza for dinner while Steve is taping the baseboards in a corner. You introduce ‘Grant’ from afar and haul the cans and boxes from the car to the room, cataloguing all you two have finished to this point and what you’ll do before stopping for the night.
Dad is impressed. He’d suspected the three of you—you, he, and Mom, that is—might settle for slapping some paint up around where the electrician would install the new lights. No one planned on getting this far in one evening.
He won’t stand in the way of progress, so your dad simply calls out, “bit of an artist, are ya?”
Steve looks up, confident with only the side table lamps plugged in, he can barely be seen. “Just want to be useful,” he mutters.
You wink at your dad as he heads back to the still-running car. “Grant is a jack of all trades.”
You’re sure to thank him for the food and let him know all the motel stuff is completely covered for tomorrow, too. You’ll work as late as you can and start as early as possible.
Dad says your friend has gone ‘above and beyond.’ You agree wholeheartedly.
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‘Grant’ would more aptly be described as a machine.
All the furniture moved, all the lights taken down, all bordering taped, and now all blemishes in the walls smoothed, your impromptu contractor finally calls it quits when he’s forced to watch stuff dry.
You’ve kept the air conditioning going in one room.
Steve tentatively asks if he should walk you up to the house, but you counter with “it’s not any less dangerous for an average guy alone to return” and a cheeky smirk. Besides, it is very late. You let Captain OCD keep going; you tapped out a while ago.
He puts his hands on his hips, arms akimbo, thinking of a comeback that never manifests. After giving up, Steve takes his tiny bag into the bathroom and brushes his teeth.
You can faintly hear it over the murmur of the TV.
You aren’t really watching. It’s background noise to your general exhaustion.
With only a side lamp and the screen as light, Steve’s bare feet crumple over the discarded plastic sheet on the floor. He falls into one side of the bed, fully-clothed and (finally) tired.
Though productive, the day has been a distant one, working in different rooms for most of it and tiptoeing around real conversation. You want him to feel appreciated, not pressured, so you ask if he’d like the TV on for a while or would rather quiet.
Steve just grunts with his eyes closed.
Gently, you place a hand on his chest to steady you, leaning to kiss his bearded cheek.
“Thank you, Steve,” you say softly. “Good night.”
He hums when you say his name, and before you can lift your hand away, he captures it under his, holding you in place.
His eyes aren’t open. He can’t see you smile wider.
“Okay.” You tuck yourself into his chest as he raises his other arm out of the way. “Okay.”
Your ear sits in the dip beneath his collarbone, listening to his steady heart, his thumb sweeping back and forth over you knuckles.
He smushes you closer to his side. You toss your leg over his.
You forget to turn off the TV.
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He’s sanding the spackled spots by the time you wake, so you rub across his back and dismiss yourself to get breakfast up at the house.
Steve makes no effort to go with, which is fine. You assumed as much.
Your dad calls Grant a ‘magician’ over the pop of oil in the skillet and insists you give your friend whatever he needs to keep working so fast. You are only half-joking when you admit the key is staying out of his way.
Bonus: the exchange reinforces your parents simply leaving the two of you alone down the hill, and you proudly tell Steve that when delivering him an enormous plate of scrambled eggs.
He jumps right back into planning-mode and orders you to roll the first coat of paint onto large areas. He’ll follow, completing the edges and corners.
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It’s such a domestic thing to do. There is no one in danger, there are no bodies piling up if he makes a wrong move, and he can go faster or take his sweet time. Steve breaks when he wants or needs to. He sits outside and listens to the birds in the sunshine. No one is around to question him, not even you. You are only there to encourage.
You realize he was looking for a project. He’s used to—and likes—being busy, getting his hands dirty, producing results.
It’s a long, messy day where he becomes more serene in spirit the more intensely he works. You reward him with gentle sweeps of your hand down his arms, pats on his shoulders, and brushes at the small of his back.
Despite the almost constant movement, the day is over before you know it, earlier than yesterday, but it’s too hot to go on.
All the windows stay open to air out the fumes.
Though it won’t stop you from sweating, you both shower off as many splatters and flecks of paint as you can. You insist he goes first so there’s plenty of hot water.
He’s sitting on the bed, shirtless, checking his phone when you come out of the bathroom, but he immediately squirrel the device away in his small bag. Not much to carry around. Not much to leave behind. Steve can’t leave a trace of himself anywhere.
Hunched over and fatigued, he flashes a polite smile your way and blinks heavily.
He deserves the world.
You grab the small bottle of lotion from the countertop and playfully jump onto the bed behind him.
“How about a massage, yeah? You much be aching.”
Honestly, you don’t mean for it to sound sexual, but the phrase comes out downright dirty, making Steve awkwardly chuckle.
“You don’t have to,” he placates.
“Nonsense, I want to. It’ll make the air feel cooler.” That’s as good of an excuse as any. Who cares when the rippled expanse of his back flexes wildly in your touch?
His breathes are audible from the beginning.
You dig at his traps, his leg bouncing as he tries to relax. You use your thumbs, the flats of your hands, and your knuckles.
He shoves his fist in his mouth when he starts to moan, covering the move with a cough, but muffling the noise is abandoned in favor of clasping over his lap. He’s intent on hiding his hardness this time. There’s nothing you can say to truly lessen the sting of needing more. You can’t simply tell him he’s allowed to desire this; you have to ignore his misplaced shame.
But you can take pity on him.
“If you lie flat—“ you step off the bed to give him privacy “—I’ll have more leverage.”
You hear him crawl and adjust on the sheets. “Unlike the torque on a wrench,” you add, just to show you’ve been listening to him.
More lotion is needed for the surface area.
You turn up the TV, feining interest in the late night show so any noise he makes is not as obvious. What the speakers can’t cover, however, is Steve’s involuntary thrusts when you rub the heels of you palms up and down the sides of his spine. If you prop up on your knees, he has more range of motion and doesn’t obviously rock you while mindlessly humping the bed.
His sweats are slung low on his hips, two darts of muscle prominent above his ass.
They are irresistible, the perfect grooves to target and roll into, and he immediately mewls long and deep into the mattress, fingers curling and relaxing while his body seizes.
He hasn’t even finished coming, you think, before he taps at your leg and races to the bathroom.
You hope you didn’t push too far. You hope he’d tell you to stop if he needs more space, more time. Mostly, you hope he knows you’d give him every conceivable pleasure, just because he is him.
The water runs a long time, continuous splashing in the sink, and then nothing.
He didn’t bring much because he doesn’t have much. Your heart sinks, realizing you’ve made him soil one of only two pairs of pants he has here.
He cracks open the door, muttering, but you can’t make out the words.
You turn the volume back down. “What?”
“It pretty hot.” He clears his throat. “Would you mind if I sleep…without…?”
“Naked?” you squeak before composing yourself. “That’s fine. Whatever’s comfortable.”
You shuffle up the bed to click off the lamps. This man isn’t the type to strut around in the nude—yet, anyway—so in the faint and ever-shifting glow of the screen across the room very little can be seen.
‘Little,’ however, can’t describe anything that is visible about the man emerging from the bathroom.
You have to make a point not to stare, but no skit or commercial on the channel promises the same level of entertainment.
Steve slides himself beneath the sheet, sitting near the headboard.
You hold up the remote. “On or off?”
“Off,” he says, “please.”
You’ve certainly done enough for one day. You won’t push your luck, so you hit the power button, toss it on table, and snuggle into your half of the bed, facing away.
“If it’s too hot for any covers, that’s okay, too.”
A rustling interrupts the rhythmic whir of crickets in the night until you feel a warm hand lightly mold to your waist.
This should be encouraged. This should be rewarded.
“Hey, Stevie,” you whisper, waiting for his hum, “happy belated birthday.”
At most you expect a grip of notice, but instead, the big hand snakes across you and hauls you into his chest, his long legs bending to match the crook of yours, his nose and forehead tucked against your occipital.
“We did okay today,” Steve mumbles into your shirt.
You walk your hand over your stomach to find his, lacing the fingers together. “Yes. Yes, we did.”
Steve got to be useful today. He had a partner today. He will tomorrow and the day after, for as long as he stays, for as long as you’re alive. Nothing can change that.
Maybe he can’t talk about Fight Club, but he connects with you anyway.
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A/N: Whoopsy. Didn't want to make y'all wait for a 6k+ chapter, so here's the first half! I am DEEP in the feels of this one. So, so many notes have been taken. The brainrot is real, and I fucking love it!!!!
[Next: Sensitive Boy, part II]
[Main Masterlist; Ko-Fi]
@supraveng @1950schick @patzammit @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @yiiiikesmish @ashesofblackroses @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @brandycranby @buckysprettybaby @ellethespaceunicorn @rogersbarber @spectre-posts @bucky-fricking-barnes-reads @fallinallinmendes @deandreamernp @im-a-slut-for-fluff @fangirl-swagg @georgeweaslysgirl @austynparksandpizza  @claireelizabeth85 @jamneuromain @rach2602 @royalwritersoftheuniverses @shelbygeek @rogersideup @eyebagsanonymous @trudy-shams @saranghaey @awkwardgiraffe726 @marvelmenwhore @happinessinthebeing @before-we-get-started @sjsmith56 @esposadomd @cjand10 @yearningforsappho @mrsevans90
208 notes · View notes
whyse7vn · 9 months
Text
LOVE OCTAGON? -
[ ot7 x reader ]
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YOUNG FOREVER
8 participants - 8 online
———————————
hobi: just did 8 push ups i’ll smack the shit out of anybody rn
jin: if you were a girl i’d be into that
jk: pls don’t hit me
tae: thought he liked men
jimin: could of fooled me
jin: ??????
namjoon: glad to see ur working out again hobi
hobi: what’s that supposed to mean??
namjoon: i’m glad to see you working out again?
y/n: can i watch?
jk: i want you so bad omg
y/n: ??
jk: sorry i was hacked
yoongi: did one of you order food to my house?
jk: no i wasn’t
tae: MY BURGER IS AT YOUR HOUSE???
OH MY GOD I THOUGH I WAS SCAMMED I WAS SO UPSET
jimin: eat it yoongi
tae: DON’T
pls 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
send it back to me pls i’m begging
i’m literally starving
and shaking
jin: i think you should give it back to him yoongi could be his first meal in months
hobi: real
yoongi: threw it away
tae: WHAT IS UR ISSUE??????
yoongi: you
hobi: namjoon do you want to fight?
jk: do you want me back?
jimin: shut up
tae: don’t expect to hear from me ever again bitch
yoongi: oh nooooo
namjoon: fight??
y/n: can i watch?
jin: this is stressing me out
someone give me a fun fact to calm me down
namjoon: um
hobi: xikers are the first 5th gen group
tae: that sounds like a disease
jimin: thought we would never hear from you again
yoongi: good things never last
jin: 5TH GEN??????
ARE YOU SILLY
THATS A THING??
THAT FACT DID NOT CALM ME DOWN AT ALL
jimin: ofc tae’s talking about diseases again
tae: am i wrong tho??
like
omg i got xikers rn
i’m itching soooo badddfd
pls i need to go to hospital the xikers on my back are killing me
namjoon: stop talking
tae: i’m not wrong
jk: are you ok tae?
what is xikers
it sounds bad
tae: i’m dying
pls remember me
jk: WHAT 😨
i will bro 🥺
y/n: he’s lying to you
jk: i’m not i swear i’ll remember you forever and ever
y/n: tae is lying to YOU
stupid
jk: oh
wtf man :/
tae: you never let me have fun
hobi: i want to be 5th gen
jk: but we said we were 4th gen??
namjoon: we are 3rd gen.
yoongi: let’s not do this again
tae: ME FOR 5TH GEN IT BOY
jimin: jimin 5th gen ace
jin: although i’m in shock and disbelief rn i’ll still take on the role of 5th gen it boy
tae: ?????
tf is wrong with you
can you read
i said i’m 5th gen it boy?
let’s vote
come on guys 🤗
yoongi: i vote jin
y/n: jin
jk: ME 3
jimin: ig jin
hobi: jin4thewin
namjoon: jin?
jin: i also vote for jin
tae: burn in hell
jk: y/n 5th gen it girl?
y/n: but i was 4th gen it girl last time
jk: ur right let’s swap
y/n: best 5th gen rapper
it’s an honour really
jk: i will use my 5th gen it girl title to help better the world
hobi: 5th GEN VISUAL HOSEOK
yoongi can take the best 5th gen singer title
yoongi: k
y/n: namjoon best 5th gen dancer?
jk: i agree
namjoon: ??
jin: idk about you but i love my new title
tae: i bet you do
jin: you sound mad
namjoon: again?
tae: i’m not
namjoon: you can take mine if you really want
i don’t care for you guy’s silly little game
jk: THIS IS NO GAME JOON
THIS IS OUR REAL LIFE
hobi: RIGHT
tae: KEEP UR NASTY TITLE I DONT WANT UR PITY FUCK YOU FUVK YOU FUCK YOU
jin: yikes
yoongi: all this shouting for what?
y/n: wow
namjoon: fine
jimin: why did jungkook go live naked
y/n: proof lmao?
jin: right put me off my salad fr
jimin: you were eating a salad?
jin: yeah?
jimin: ok
jin: tf you mean ok???
do you want to fight?
jimin: i’m just surprised that’s all
jin: why??????
jimin: cuz yk…
jin: no i DON’T know
pls enlighten me bitch
jk: i wasn’t naked??
jimin: yes you were
jin: HELLO???
YK WHAT?
jk: i swear i wasn’t
y/n: proof???????
jk: you want to see me naked 🤭??
i’m blushing rn
tae: i was naked once
hobi: this isn’t about you
y/n: tae sent me nudes by email once
hobi: ok this is about you
jk: WHAT????)/£/
jin: by email?
tae: omg why would you tell themmmm
jimin: why would you ever want nudes from that?
tae: that????
y/n: i never asked for them
who do you think i am??
tae: what does that mean??
namjoon: you can literally get arrested for that
tae: kinky
but i did send them on accident
so i’m sure the police would understand
jin: i do not believe that at all
and by email??
how is that an accident
yoongi: right
tae: plus i did look super hot right y/n?
y/n: that not the point
tae: see how she didn’t say no
jk: SAY NO
hobi: send the nudes here i say!
jin: DO NOT
jk: say no before i shoot myself in the head
jimin: wow
namjoon: it doesn’t matter if she thought you looked good or not you can’t go round sending ur nudes to people with without warning
tae: says who?
namjoon: the fucking law?
are you okay?? like that’s common sense
wtf is wrong with you
hobi: joons getting mad oh my god >.<
yoongi: thought we established he has no common sense
tae: i knew telepathically that she needed to receive nudes from me in order to keep living
jin: so you didn’t send them by accident then
tae: accident on purpose it’s all the same thing tbh
y/n: to keep living??
jimin: they are polar opposites actually
tae: omg all of u on my dick rn
don’t be mad i stepped up and you didn’t
jk: i was goONA STEP UP
ITVWAS SUPPOSED TO BE ME
I HATE YOU
IM GOING TO KILL YOU
hobi: jk’s mad this is scary >.<
jin: witnessing the fall the taekook in real time
wow this is truly beautiful
tae: omg chill out??
it’s nothing she hasn’t seen before
jimin: and is that by choice?
jk: I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU
hobi: wait what?
namjoon: everyone shut the fuck up
jin: look now you made joon fr mad
hobi: sorry namjoon >.<
tae: it wasn’t even my fault
y/n: i’m the victim here don’t be mad at me
jk: DO SOMETHING ABOUT HIM JOON
yoongi: i’m tired
jimin: this is a lot to take in
namjoon: taehyung apologise
tae: FOR WHAT?????????
hobi: ur sick in the head
namjoon: now
tae: sorry??????
jk: nasty bitch
tae: y/n let’s tell them about us
jk: what
yoongi: 🤨
y/n: us?
tae: ummmmmmm lol?
she’s normally not like this i swear
she likes me honestly
stop embarrassing in front of the guys babe
y/n: blocking you
tae: are u using me for my body???
i sent you nudes TWICE
hobi: one in a million we are twice 🩷💖
tae: you said i was hot
are we not in love?
yoongi: lol
jk: YOU SENT HER NUDES TWICE???????
OH MY GODDDDSJEJ SOMEONE PLs PULL THE TRIGGER FOR ME IM TOO WEAK TO DO THIS ANYMOREEEENBE
jimin: so like did she ask for the nudes the first time?
y/n: SHUT UP???
jimin: OH MY GODFF YIU TOTALY DID
THE PLOT THICKENS
y/n: namjoon tell them to stop taking
namjoon: stop talking
hobi: wait…
is this the fwb you’ve been talking about for weeks
tae: STOP SPEAKING
jin: wooow ur really sad
jk: OhH MY GODDDD ANd I CONGRATULATED YOU SND EVERYTHING OH MY GODDDHDXUD KILL MEMEME KILL MEMEEEE
y/n: fwb?
we have not fucked
jk: oh thajnk god
yoongi: have you kissed?
hobi: yoongi’s jealous >.<
yoongi: just asking
tae: i don’t want to talk about this anymore
jimin: look he’s embarrassed
they totally have not kissed
tae: bottom lie is that she said i was hot
jk: SHE WANTEF TO SEE ME NAKED BEFORE SO UR NOT SPECIAL
DONT LET IT GET TO UR HEAD
BITCH
namjoon: calm down jungkook
jk: HES A LITTLE SNAKE I WILL NOT CALM DOWN NEVER EVER EVER
I LIKED HER FIRST
yoongi: no you didn’t?
jin: is this a love triangle?
hobi: classic case of a love square
jimin: love square?
y/n: no one is in love
tae: my life is over
y/n: get a grip
jimin: i’m feeling left out put me in the square
hobi: it wouldn’t be a square then
jimin: love pentagon?
jin: make it a hexagon
hobi: wait wtf and me
love heptagon so cute 💞
what about you namjoon?
namjoon: what about me?
jimin: do you want to fuck y/n yes or no?
y/n: oh my god????
jk: YOU BETTER SAY NO
SAY NO
ILL KILL YOU
namjoon: i’m not answering that
jk: GOOD
WAIT WTF ARE YOU TRYING TI SAY YOU DON’T THINK SHES HOT???
WTF IS WRONG WITH yOU???
SHE IS NOT UGLY
namjoon: i never said that
jimin: i’m taking that as a yes
hobi: love octagon 🩷
y/n: what happened to talking about our 5th gen life 🙁
jk: i love 5th gen
hobi: what is with the gc name?
jimin: it’s for jin’s mental health
jin: ur actually decreasing my mental health by taking about 5th gen
jimin: are newjeans 5th gen?
jin: okay so just fuck me then?
yoongi: idk
hobi: I LOVE NEWJEANS
oHUr my OHUR MY GODTT
jin: i don’t listen minors sing
it’s bad for the economy
jimin: just say they make you feel old as shit
jk: i don’t listen to other women sing
y/n: ???
jk: i mean i love when other women sing
i actually only listen to girl groups
tae: he’s lying
because that’s actually me
y/n: shut the fuck up both of you
yoongi: real
y/n: and you
yoongi: ??????????????????????
jimin: LMAO
HE DIDN’T EXPECT THAT
jin: GOTTT HIKMMMMM LMAOSOSOSOIDKEKEKDKDKDK
hobi: i love feminism ❤️
y/n: it’s nice not arguing
namjoon: i’ve been telling you all
jimin: true!!!
hobi: you argue the most
jimin: me???
hobi: yes you
you and jin literally argued 10 seconds ago
jin: don’t put us in the same sentence like that i’m getting uncomfortable
namjoon: the fact that they actually shut the fuck up
what have i been doing wrong
jimin: maybe cuz you don’t have a pussy idk
namjoon: did you have to be so vulgar?
y/n: vulgar?
what are you 65??
hobi: pussy is power
NOT vulgar
jin: vulgar is such a nasty word like ew vulgar
namjoon: i’m leaving
jin: praise god
namjoon left “young forever”
tae: i love pussy btw
jimin left “young forever”
hobi left “young forever”
y/n left “young forever”
yoongi left “young forever”
jk: personally i think you’re so brave for saying that
and taekook lived!!
517 notes · View notes
worldlxvlys · 3 months
Text
texts with fwb! nate (part 8)
fwb nate x sturniolo reader
warnings: cursing, mentions of sex
a/n: hehehee
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when i walked into nick’s room, he was sat with his legs crossed on his bed.
upon hearing me, his head shot up in my direction.
“hey” he spoke softly, flashing a small smile.
“hey” i whispered as i closed his door before joining him on his bed.
“ok, so. start from the beginning” he said.
i explained the entire situation to him, leaving out the explicit details.
when i finished, his eyes were wide and mouth hung open.
“you mean to tell me you two have been sneaking around for months ?” he looked distraught.
“i know, i get it, you’re disgusted in me. i couldn’t keep my legs closed-“ he cut me off.
“hey, don’t talk about yourself like that. i’m not mad that you kept it from me, i’m upset that you felt like you had to keep it from me”
my face scrunched up in confusion.
“listen, i don’t love the idea of you being with one of my best friends, but if he makes you happy then i’m not opposed to it” he said.
“and i get you keeping it from matt and chris, but why me? i always thought that we were close enough to tell each other anything” i never considered the fact that he might be more hurt about me not telling him than he was about me being with nate.
i let out a sigh, “i don’t know, nick. i always just assumed you would tell them. you never keep things from them, isn’t that breaking triplet code, or whatever ?”
he placed his hand on my arm gently.
“yes they are my triplet brothers, but you’re my sister. when have i ever told them about your business ? it’s not mine to tell. i’ve told you a million times before and i’ll tell you again, i have your back. of course i won’t tell them”
“thank you, nick. i really appreciate it”
“always. but you do know you can’t keep this from them forever, right ? you’re gonna have to tell them eventually”
“yeah, i know. i just gotta figure out how”
“hey, we’ll figure it out together. that’s what i’m here for” i pulled him in for a hug, squeezing his shoulders.
“ok, so, give me all the details” my eyes widened.
“you want the details ?” he immediately caught onto what i meant.
“wha- NO! NO! not the sexual details, jesus”
i raised my hands in defense, “alright, well, how was i supposed to know what type of details you were talking about !?”
“i meant, the stuff you were talking about in the texts”
i felt my face begin to heat up and i looked down. “oh, those details”
he tilted his head, dropping it slightly to meet my eyes “you have feelings for him” he asked in a softer voice.
i squeezed my eyes shut as i fought the smile that was growing on my face.
“OHHHH! you’re getting all bashfullll !” he teased.
“nick, stoppp” i said as i covered my face with my hands.
“don’t hide now girl, you weren’t shy when your bed was banging against the wall last night”
my eyes widened in horror, jaw hanging open.
“yeah, bitch, you forgot we share a wall, huh ?”
“y- you heard that ?” i asked, eyes still as wide as ever.
“ girl. you’re not quiet, sorry. i knew you were fucking someone, just never thought it was nate of all people. that man has you screaming and moa-“ i slapped his chest quickly, trying to shut him up.
“oh my gosh, nick. please stop”
“ok, ok” he said. we both looked at each other before breaking out into fits of laughter.
tears streamed down our faces and we held our stomachs as we continued to laugh at each other’s laughter.
when we finally calmed down, we wiped out tears away.
“ok, but i’m actually really glad that you found out. i need to talk about my feelings”
“that’s what i’m here for”
we talked for a while, staying up until the early hours of the next day.
eventually, we fell into a peaceful slumber.
we were blissfully unaware of what chaos we were going to wake up to. 
 ———————
yayyyy supportive nickkk
fwb! nate masterlist
main masterlist
tag list: @lovingsturniolo @lustfulslxt @gwenlore @flowerxbunnie @sturnssx @mattslolita @its-jennarose @sturnsdior @sophssturn @bernardsleftbootycheek @queen161718 @chrisdevora @cupidsword @nickmillersn1gf @stramboli4life @mattsneezing @chrisstankyleg @sturniolobltch @vib3swithanuk @ciarasturn1 @bethsturn @bernardenjoyer @mbbsgf @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @ssturniolo @blueeyedbesson @mxqdii @sturniolowhore @rheaakayourname @defnotayonna @urmom2bitch @abbie13sworld @starsturniolo @hearts4chriss @theyluv-meee @sturns-posts @carolinalikesthings @itzdarling @chrisstopherfilmed @judespoision @sstvrnioloo @littlebookworm803 @nicksdrpepper @chrisloyalgf @robins-scoop @freshloveforthefit @creamoncreamoncream2 @whos-avi @imwetforyourmom @rootbeerworshiper
213 notes · View notes
shawnxstyles · 9 months
Text
free session
DATE: AUGUST 8, 2023
summary: tom hurts himself a little at the gym, but luckily, you’re there to reassure him that everything’s fine. when he finally comes back, you decide to show him what a free session is all about.
request: yup!!
words: 7k
warnings: SMUT (slight praise kink, protected sex, dirty talking), language. this was a quick one
note: okay so i don’t do threesomes lmao, but i didn’t state that until after i got this request (this request is 8 months old i’m sorry). i chose to do tom, but i changed a lot, so i’m sorry if this isn’t even what you asked for at all… i hope someone likes it | NOT EDITED
gym!tom x trainer!reader
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Tom had a steady routine; he went to the gym in the morning, ate, did his day plans or work, ate again, and then went to the gym at night again. Some people thought he was insane for going to the gym so much, but it felt like his second home. Mainly because the gym was his brother’s, Harry.
Harry and Tom were unbelievably close; out of all their siblings, they were definitely the tightest. Tom assisted Harry with renting, paperwork, and anything he needed for his little business, which wasn’t so little anymore. Once he got popular in town, Tom let his brother handle himself after all his constant nagging. Then Tom was off doing his own thing, worrying about his own life and job. It got consistent, tedious, and boring to say the least.
But on a random summer day when Harry called Tom to deliver the bad news, Tom regrets ever thinking that his simple routine was boring.
“Tom, I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to find a new gym.”
“What? Harry, what are you talking about?” Tom drops his gym bag on the floor of his apartment, stopping short with Harry’s words. He presses the phone up to his ear, teeth nibbling on his bottom lip.
“I didn’t tell you before, but all my “loyal” customers have fled to the new fitness center down the street. You know, the one by the café?”
“Yeah…”
“It’s only temporary. I need to refurbish and find some more sponsors, and then hopefully, I can reopen.”
Tom sighs slowly into the empty air of his home, looking up at the ceiling in distress.
“I was trying to figure out how to tell you—”
“It’s alright, Harry. I’m glad you told me now. I’ll just… find a new gym.”
“If you go to my competitor, I won’t blame you.”
Tom replies with a hefty laugh.
“It’ll only be temporary.”
So, that’s what Tom has been doing—going to his brother's competitor. However, it was only supposed to be for a few weeks. But it ended up being a few months. Tom’s adjusted to the new gym quite nicely. He likes the wide variety of machinery and how many options he has. When he first came in, he was using machines he’d never even seen before.
Even though his gym was switched up on him, Tom is a routine kind of guy. It only took him a week to adapt to his new environment and get comfortable with everything. He developed a new schedule for his morning workouts since he can no longer go to the gym in the evening. He wasn’t necessarily a morning person, but for the gym-induced high, he would do it.
He had a specific day for arms, legs, chest, back, shoulders—everything. Over the years, he’s done his research on the body, and even took anatomy in high school.
Did that even help him?
To say he’s gym-obsessed isn’t too much of an overstatement, even if Tom disagrees. He would say he’s obsessed with his dog, but not the gym. He refuses to put himself in the category of “gym-bros” and dumbasses that live off protein shakes. Yeah, he likes those shakes too, but he wouldn’t die if he had more than one cheat day in a week. Tom likes to live his life outside of the gym, unlike those people.
Tom worked an average job with a good salary, and relatively lived an average life with good people. He didn’t go out much because he didn’t have many people to hang out with besides his brothers. Harrison has been his best mate since high school, but with both of their work schedules colliding, it’s hard to find the time. Plus, he’s been way too busy planning his wedding.
Yeah, a wedding.
Tom’s not surprised by the fact that Harrison’s getting married. In fact, he’s not surprised at all. Of course he’s happy for his best friend. He’s just… envious in a subtle way. Both Tom and him are 28 years old, and while Harrison met the love of his life and is starting a future with her, Tom is yet to even date a girl for longer than a few weeks.
He’s been on dates here and there, even had a few one-night stands in the past year, but after some time, he just gave up completely. Sometimes, a girl will smile at him or look him up and down, but he doesn’t even try to pursue them like he used to. For the few times that he is out with his friends or brothers and a girl is all over him, he’ll take the opportunity and bring her home.
But it never goes farther than that. And Tom is afraid he’ll never have more than that.
Shaking off the terrible thoughts to start his morning, Tom walks through the glass doors of the gym. He passes the front desk and towards the clean machines that are practically calling his name. The barely rising sun can be seen through the huge window panes along the entire building, making the scene look peaceful.
There were a couple of bodies in the area, but besides the delicate music seeping through the speakers, it was quiet. To Tom, this was tranquil.
After a few simple stretches, Tom snatches the jump ropes. He jumps until his muscles are loose and warm and they’re just itching to be challenged. Today, he decided to do legs with an additional ab workout just because. He was a little extra energized, and he craved for his body to be sore. He doesn’t do this often, but he needs to change it up once in a while, right?
Tom goes straight towards the leg press, knowing that that machine will fire his legs up immediately. When he starts his reps, he already feels the burn. He knows today is going to push his limits, but he’s ready.
About halfway through his workout, he wants to give up. But he knows that’s exactly when you need to keep going.
He’s struggling with his squats, really trying to lift these three plates that are taunting him. He can do two easily, which means he has to add weight if he wants to actually gain and keep his muscles. He takes a deep breath before trying to squat for the second time. He slides the padded bar over his ready shoulders. The weight is dawning and plummeting his own body to the ground.
As he lowers his legs, squatting with the best of his abilities, his lower back aches immensely before he drops the bar onto the matted floor. The plates clang against each other in the relatively quiet gym
“Fuck,” he groans and chucks off his headphones, clutching his lower back near his tailbone. This is now the second time he’s failed, but the first time he’s felt this pain. It wasn’t a shooting, sharp pain, but it was aching enough to warn him that he was positioning himself wrongly.
“Are you okay?” A woman’s voice asks concerningly a few feet behind him. Tom turns around too quickly, making his back hurt a little more. He tries to hide his hiss behind clenched teeth when he sees you.
Your eyes were wide with worry and your head was slightly tilted. You were sporting a tight sports bra with matching shapely leggings. You had a towel dangling in your hand and a black shirt in the other. Maybe it was because of his small pain, but Tom couldn’t help dragging his eyes down your body in awe. He hisses at the sight unconsciously.
“I’m assuming that’s a no,” You squint your eyes with a slight tease as you walk up to him. Tom nods while also fixating in the present. He had a tendency to drift off into his head if his imagination wandered enough.
“Yeah, I think I hurt my bad a bit,” he smiles while trying to stretch by twisting left and right.
“Maybe I can help? If you’d like me to,” You offer as Tom stares at you. Your eyelashes are fluttering almost innocently, and Tom is beyond intrigued. He nods with a charming smile, one that you just had to reflect back. It was easily one of the most gorgeous smiles Tom has ever seen.
“Just so you know, I kind of work here. Well—I mean—I do work here. I’m just new,” You rambled. You were a bit nervous. You were a certified trainer, but you’ve never trained someone outside of your schooling. Yes, you’ve done family and friends, but not a stranger. A random stranger who actually needs your experience. You’re not sure how you landed a job at this seemingly high-end gym, but you never question the good things that happen anymore; you just let them happen.
“Good to know. Since you offered, I assume you know what you’re doing,” Tom teases and you roll your eyes playfully. He eased some of your nerves.
When you ask how he was squatting, he explains what he was doing and when and where the pain was occurring. You nodded along to his words, collecting all of it and connecting it to your knowledge. You come to a conclusion long before he’s done and gaze at his body. You know a lot about anatomy and you’ve seen a bunch of bodies throughout your life.
But staring at his ripped and sweaty body has you feeling all warm and tingly. The morning sunlight seems to shine perfectly over his perspiration, twinkling as a few drops slide between his rigid muscles.
“I think you strained your back,” You say simply without blinking right as he finished talking. You shake your head as if you weren’t just ogling his muscles. What is wrong with you? You were supposed to be a professional.
“Oh,” Tom finally says with a slight frown to his face.
“Does it hurt when you turn as well or just when squatting?”
“Mainly just squatting,” he answers.
“Okay,” You give him a once-over as if analyzing him. You were analyzing him, just not in a very professional way. There was nothing professional about how your eyes turned hungry as they gazed at his blessed figure. “The best thing to do is to not sit. Or stop what you’re doing basically. I would say no more squats for a while or anything that strikes pain. But don’t terminate all your exercise. That will actually make it worse.”
Tom nods along to all that you’re saying with understanding. Everything that you’re telling him makes perfect sense, so there was a good minute where he zoned out and just stared at you. Your matching set makes your skin look smooth and defines every curve of your body. The way your hands moved as you spoke had him mesmerized like he was under hypnosis.
“Got it?” You ask as a heat floods up your neck. Tom blinks rapidly and mumbles a yes, but he looks all too distracted. He didn’t hide well that he was staring at you, but he didn’t seem like he was trying to either.
“Is there anything else?” Tom questions as the air between you two gets tense, voice lower than before. Panting and echoing machines are all that are heard in the space around you. You swallow your sudden nervousness that was about to cough up a whine. You wondered if he wanted you to say something else.
Maybe he wanted you to confess. Confess something that you were both thinking, but you both didn’t know.
“N-No,” You slightly stutter out when you answer, smiling to try to cover this feeling that’s bubbling up inside of you.
“Well, I guess I’ll just do the treadmill before I head out.”
“Right. Sounds good. Have fun!” You ramble as he walks away, chuckling with each step he takes. You turn away and your smile instantly falls as you groan to yourself, “Have fun? Why did I say that?”
You run your hand over your face as you try to regain your lost pride. When you walk back into the coach’s area, you slip on your uniform shirt, so people are aware you actually work there. You take a deep breath and mentally slap yourself in the head for being so unprofessional. You barely just started working here and you’re already breaking rules! You’re not allowed to have relationships with your clients. Wait, that’s a rule, right? Now, that doesn’t make much sense…
But you know for certain that thinking about someone sexually after just meeting them, rule or not, client or not, it’s inappropriate. You’ve never looked at someone and just completely melted at the sight of them. You can’t stop picturing the way his leg muscles flexed as he carried the heavy weight of the squat bar. Or the way his cheeks reddened and hollowed out air as he pushed himself to stand up straight.
Although you watch and help people work out for a living, you’ve never found it entertaining. But for some reason, your mind is just so utterly fucked over by this random guy that you’ve never seen before. He looks like he’s been doing it a long time, especially with that figure. Has he been at this gym for a long time? He seems like he has.
Your mind likes to wander and wander as you do busy work and wait for the day to end. From your area, you weren’t able to see the front doors, so you never saw the stranger again that day. You assume he left soon after your departure, but you wish that you saw him just once more. Maybe you’d get the confidence to catch his name and even offer a session. Free of charge, you imagine yourself saying accidentally because you’d be so distracted.
Throughout your shift you helped a few people and even assisted in the group exercise class. Though, you loved when you had one on one trainings the most because you got to see your client grow their strengths and their weaknesses.
As your shift came to an end, you collected your bag with a heavy sigh. It was only the afternoon, but of course you didn’t have any plans. You had spent a year working to become a certified trainer, but brought no one with you along the way. You took a gap year when high school ended to try to figure out what you wanted to do, and then you discovered training and you felt comfortable. You had some friends, but none were strong enough to stay with you. It was really just you, with the occasional hangout with your older sister who lectured you sometimes.
You felt lonely sometimes, but it’s not like you really tried to fix it either. You went out every blue moon, waiting for some magical miracle to occur. Nothing sprouts; no love, sex, relationship, or friendship spawned at your feet when you’re out late at night in a bar or club. So, you kind of just stopped going. Was it sad to say you kind of lost hope in dating and sex?
Besides the point, when you entered your apartment, you were alone. Just like most days when you weren’t busy researching ways to start a business.
Oh, was that mentioned?
You wanted to start your own business with your certification. However, it was hard because you had little to no experience in business. Your dad knew good tips and tricks, but he wasn’t experienced enough either. And since you were quite lonely, you hadn’t made many connections to people that might have loads of talent in the field.
One day, you would actually talk to someone, you swore. And they would help make your dreams of a business come to life. It’s not that you didn’t believe in yourself to make it happen; it was more than a reasonable goal. It’s just that you’re so unmotivated right now because of your lack of connections.
Ugh, why does life have to be so difficult?
Tom wakes up early with groggy eyes and a sore back. He had done some research online last night on how to sleep with a strained back. He was told to lay on his side with a pillow stuffed between his knees. But of course when he woke up in the morning, his body was flailed across his mattress like an eagle, pillows completely disregarded from him.
When he tried to sit up too quickly, a sharp pain erupted in his back, making him sit right back in the bed. Maybe he should just take his time like the woman at the gym said…
You were slightly disappointed you didn’t see the good-looking stranger again on your shift. You shamelessly glanced around the machinery, hoping to recognize his bulky shoulders and defined muscles, but they were nowhere to be found.
You got to see a few good bodies, but there was something about that stranger that just made your insides tingle.
Again, so unprofessional. This is why you can’t start a damn business!
Tom didn’t go to the gym for a week. A week!
His back was just in too much pain and lifting heavy weights sounded tortuous. He still went to work and went on evening walks with his dog, but he felt pretty lazy. He forced himself to take a week off of the gym to heal, and thankfully it worked. His mind kept lingering to the pretty woman who talked to him, but he kept excusing it with his pain. He must only be thinking of you because you gave advice he needs to remember, right?
By the next week, Tom was already back in the gym. He walked through those glass doors again, quickly checked in, and headed towards the machinery. He moved slowly as his eyes subconsciously tried to find you again. Tom had this… need to tell you that he’s okay and that your advice worked. Again, it was just an excuse, so he could talk to you again. Maybe he would see your name tag this time, or just ask for it blatantly.
He makes a quick once-over of the area, and is a bit disappointed when he doesn’t see you lingering. He goes straight towards the jump rope to refresh his muscles that have been resting for one of the longest times since high school.
Tom jumps and jumps and jumps… and then nearly falls over when he sees you turn around after doing a squat. The curve of your ass in those leggings made his mouth water and your charming smile made him crazy.
Before he knows it, you’re approaching him while he’s completely phased.
“Hey, I see that you made it back. How is your… back?” You ask, squeezing the towel in your hand with an intense grip. Your heart started fluttering a little from just the sight of him, and you wondered why you were getting so worked up over a stranger.
“It’s all good now! I think,” Tom chuckles while rubbing his neck. He nervously twists the rope between his fingers, trying to think of a way to keep the conversation going. “I, uh, never caught your name.”
Your heart skips a beat and a smile threatens to take over your face. It was such a little thing, but you’ve been wondering what his name was for the past week. A name to a face to fit your fantasies.
“Y/N,” You smile, but your eyes struggle to meet his face. He was just so gorgeous you felt like you might be blinded if you looked too long. “And you?”
“Tom,” he surely answered with a nod.
“That fits you very well.”
“What do you mean?” he questions and your eyes go a little wide. You hadn’t meant to say that. It sounds creepy and weird; to say that his name fits him… as if you were thinking about him.
“Well—like—I was wondering what your name was when I first talked to you and now that you said it, it makes sense. Not that I was thinking about you all week or something… that’s just creepy!” You awkwardly laugh after your ramble, thinking of the fastest way to leave this conversation so you can regroup. This is why your dating life is so shallow. You can’t hold a conversation for a second without rambling out nonsense or making a fool of yourself. It’s typical, really.
You thought he was going to laugh at you like a bully and walk away from your weirdness. But instead, he softly chuckles at your antics while staring at your face. Noticing that he’s still standing in front of you, you slowly drag your eyes up his body until you finally meet his eyes.
They’re that perfectly golden brown color that looks like oozing honey when reflected off the sun. Since you were only a foot away, you could see his nose was a little crooked and he had an uneven eyebrow. His hair seemed a bit unruly, but all you wanted to do was run your hands through it.
“I’ve been wondering what your name was, too,” he finally admits when the air around you feels like it’s closing in. Your heart was beating as if something was going to happen, but you knew nothing would. Nothing was going to happen in front of all of these people.
“Really?”
“Mhm,” Tom hums as he watches your pupils dilate and eyes struggle to look at him. He’s been thinking about you all week, he can admit that, but now you can’t even look at him? He wanted to see your pretty eyes. “I’ve been wondering about a few other things as well.”
“Oh? Like what?” Your voice was slightly breathless and you felt the need to check over your shoulder every second. You felt like you were breaking some rule and you were able to be fired on the spot. It felt so wrong, but you wanted to see where this goes. You were all too intrigued by this glorious man before you.
“Like why you can’t look at me.”
“What? I’m looking at you!”
“Not longer than a blink.”
“S-So? Do you want to have a staring contest or something?” You bite your tongue when you stutter.
“Maybe. I just want to see your pretty eyes,” Tom didn’t plan on calling your eyes pretty right off the bat, but his bluntness is what made you finally look up at him. He saw innocence as well as desire laced within your irises. And he wondered if you really had been thinking about him all week. If you had, that would confirm that you want more. It would confirm that Tom isn’t crazy, and that there is some type of spark in between you too.
Will a one-time thing, like sex, dull the craving spark, or ignite it?
“We can’t here,” You say barely above a whisper.
“Do what? A staring contest?” Tom begins to smirk causing you to groan. He’s got to be one of the cockiest people you’ve ever met, but he has every right to be. Usually, you hate men that know they’re attractive because their cockiness just makes them an asshole. But Tom is the funny type, who pretends to be cocky, but he’s actually really humble.
How did you get all of that from only two conversations with him? And they were barely conversations!
“You know what I mean.”
“I don’t, actually. Care to tell?”
“You want…” You can see the way he tries to hide his growing smirk and it tells you all you needed to know. The air thickened between you both, heavy with tension and heat. Your heart was racing and your stomach burned in a way that pushed your courage over the edge. You’ve needed something like this for a long time, you just never knew how long you actually needed it. “You want me to give you a session!”
Tom clicked his tongue at your teasing, slightly chuckling. You blinked your eyes as you flashed your fraud innocence at him.
“What does the session include?” His voice was low and deep. There was a certain rumble in his tone that made your legs feel like jelly and your mind go blank.
“I-I can show you. Let’s go in the back,” You try to remain as playful as possible, but you were absolutely losing it. You just wanted him to take control and kiss you as hard as possible; to do the unimaginable. Of course, the horniest you’ve ever been in your whole life is at work of all places. There’s no way there isn’t a rule about having sex in the gym. You’re sure people have done it before, but never employees. That had to have been prohibited.
But your desire is taking control of all your actions right now as you lead Tom through the gym and into your miniature office. Since you were relatively new, your office was in the back of the gym in a little room. The other offices for the more experienced trainers were near the front and were wide open to the public. You didn’t like how your space was so far away from everything because it made you feel disconnected, but right now, you’ve never been more grateful.
As you guide him into your office, you shut the door and push in the lock. You had a small wooden desk with a single picture frame and a laptop. A few different papers lie across, but you’re quick to stack them and slot them in the first drawer. When you stand back up, Tom is closer to you than ever, hovering right over you.
Your heart rate increases exponentially as his hungry eyes pierce your soul. Your impulses want to rip his shirt dramatically off of his torso, so you can run your hands all along his sweaty, ripped stomach. You’d make sure to kiss every centimeter of skin before landing on your knees for him. You’re almost positive you’d do anything he’d ask. Before you can even blink, he’s leaning in, cutting the distance and inching closer to your weekly fantasy.
“So what do I get?” His voice was breathy as his eyes flicked from your eyes to your lips. You couldn’t help but do the same.
“Anything. Anything you want,” You respond way too quickly, your desperation spilling out from you. Out of instinct, you took a step back from him, making your back bump into the wall. He was crowding your space as much as he could without actually touching you. And it was utterly killing you.
“What a generous trainer,” he placed his hand delicately on the wall next to your head. “Do you do this with all of your clients?”
“Only the fittest,” Your lustfulness made you brutally honest as if you had chugged truth serum. “But no, I’ve never… brought anyone back here before.”
“The first and the fittest. I might just have to book a session.”
“Luckily, a spot just opened. You can have it,” Your eyes meet him again. The second he sees your eyelashes flutter up, there’s nothing stopping him from kissing you. Not the tension, not the voices in his head, not the fear of someone knocking on the door asking for you.
Tom’s lips crash against yours in an eager kiss, lips melting together from the heat you’ve built up. It’s sweet and it’s salty, but it’s fulfilling that nagging ache you’ve wanted cured all week long. Your hands immediately find their way to his luscious curls, lacing your fingers through them just like you imagined. His rough-textured hand cups your jaw, angling you directing into his mouth when he slots a bit of his tongue inside.
His body presses forward against yours, rock-hard, stiff, and hot. The feeling of his heaviness and warmth was even better than you had conjured up in your crazy, little head. His rhythm was easy to rock with, and your body gravitated towards his. You whimpered into his mouth when his growing bulge poked the bottom of your tummy. Tom took that as a sign and popped off of your mouth. He trailed his wondrous mouth down your pulsing neck, causing you to stab your teeth into your lip to keep quiet.
Tom kissed and nibbled your skin without a care of who might see the marks. He didn’t know what would happen after all of this, but he wanted you to have at least one memory when it was all over. When reached your collarbone, he forced himself off of you.
“What do you want?” he grumbled.
“W-What? I don’t know! Anything, just do something, please.”
“You’re the trainer. You’re supposed to tell me what to do, no?” Tom’s teasing sends a tingle down your stomach that hits you straight in between your legs. “Do y’want me to fuck–”
“God, yes. Do anything, please,” You groaned, trying not to sound too desperate, but it was difficult when that’s all you were.
“Alright, alright, don’t worry.”
Tom pushed himself off of your body to remove his shirt. His glorious body was perfectly defined by his packed muscles wrapped in his tan skin. His skin looked so smooth, like a silky blanket. Your impulses got the best of you and before you could even think, they were roaming his god-like figure with curiosity.
“How are you so fit? Who is your trainer and how can I learn from them?” You question both jokingly and seriously. When he laughs, you can feel it vibrate through your fingertips and it makes you feel all fuzzy.
“I train myself, but I know some great cardio exercises I’d be willin’ to show you,” he winks as his hand lands on your hip. It was your turn to laugh now, your voice breaking the tight tension.
“Please,” You begged, tugging both of his hands toward you. It was your way of saying that he could do whatever he wanted now. “Go ahead.”
So he did. You removed your tennis shoes and then he yanked down your leggings. You were so needy at this point you didn’t even bother to discard your snug bra. If anything, you’re going to need its security with all the movement you’re about to do (hopefully).
His hands grabbed the hem of your leggings until they were completely off of your legs. You’re left in your soaking thong while he’s still in his loose gym shorts. Tom doesn’t waste another second because he’s growing just as impatient as you. He can feel himself twitching in his briefs, craving for a satisfaction that only you can seem to sedate.
Without a warning, Tom cups your mound with delicacy, fingers pressing against your aching hole. The gasp you let out is unwavering as your cunt clenches around nothing but your own desperation. He scrunches his palm, rubbing your underwear as you soaked through the fabric.
“Can feel that you’re soaking, darling,” Tom husks beside your ear, sending shocks of heat down your spine. You’ve never been so turned on in your life from someone, especially because of a deep, sensual accent like his. “Did I do this?”
“Yes, yes. All for you,” You nearly whined, but you withheld it with a strain. “Please just fuck me already.”
“What’s the rush, love? Got somewhere to be?” he taunted. You didn’t have anywhere to be and he seemed to know that. He was lucky you didn’t have any clients today or have any appointments. It was like the perfect coincidence that this occurred on this day. You’re grateful for the fate of the universe as he slips his hand into your panties to lace his fingers within your wetness.
“So fucking wet, love,” he grumbled so low you could barley hear it.
“I need it, please,” This is the most submissive you’ve ever been. You can’t recall a time where you have ever been this wet or needy for another man. There’s just something incredibly alluring about the man about you, rock-hard body and all.
“What do you need? Do you need me to put my finger in your tight, little hole? I bet it would just slide right in.”
“Fuck, Tom,” You growled in sexual frustration. His mouth spilled utter filth, but you were loving it. You felt the very tip of his finger nudging inside of you, causing your walls to clutch tightly. “I need you to fuck me. Please. No teasing.”
With an ever-growing smirk, Tom slips his hand out of your underwear and glides the material down your jelly-like legs. Your eyes never leave his hands, too scared to meet his intimidating eyes. You watch him with curiosity and desire as he tucks his thumbs in the waistband. His briefs come into your view and your eyes widen when you see the impressive bulge outline.
You swallow, intimidated by his size, especially since you haven’t had sex in a decent amount of time. He hasn’t even pulled down his underwear yet and you’re already frothing at the mouth.
“Do you have a condom?”
“I, um,” Your eyes wander around to your purse on the floor by your desk and you quickly bend down to pop it open. In one of your secret pockets, there is a nicely wrapped condom. “Here. I hope it fits.”
Tom laughs as he tugs his briefs down with ease. “You’re not good for my ego.”
You wanted to laugh in response, but you were too distracted by his cock. Mesmerizingly, you gaze at his hand stroking his veiny length, seemingly as desperate as you with pre-cum leaking at the tip.
Instead of grabbing the condom from your hand, Tom says, way too gravelly, “I want you to do it.”
So, with shaky hands and doe-eyes, you rip open the package and slide on the latex. The look on your face can easily make it seem like you’ve never even seen a dick before. But now looking at Tom’s, it feels like all the others are down the drain.
Within seconds, Tom has you back against the wall, one hand resuming beside your head and the other on your hip. Your heart jumped and pussy throbbed, waiting for him to break the lustful barrier in between you two.
“Ready?”
“Y-Yes,” You whimper as the head of his cock glides along your thighs before sliding in between them. Your arousal soaks the condom as he grips one of your legs, hoisting you up and around his waist. Your arms instantly wrap around his neck for security as your leg connects to him like a koala.
With one leg on the floor, you try to maintain your balance as he finally thrusts into you. You both collectively groan in sexual satisfaction, finally having your craving fulfilled. When you thought he had pushed all the way in, Tom pumps deeper inside of you, causing you to squeal.
“Shh, darling. Don’t want anyone to hear us fucking in your office, do you?” Your moans contradict his request, but you can’t help it. His hips were flicking up into you so fucking deliciously, and you couldn’t stop yourself from bucking right back into him. “Or maybe you do. You want someone to walk in and see one of their trainers getting their brains fucked out?”
“M-Maybe,” You couldn’t lie, the idea was enthralling. The idea and his dirty words made your toes curl and eyes roll to the back of your head. He knew exactly what to say and when to say it, almost as if he’d studied this.
“But I don’t want to get fired,” You whined a little too loudly.
“Well, then you better be a good girl and quiet down.”
In order to obey his demand, you brought one of your hands to cover your mouth. You allowed yourself to moan in your palm when his pace increased and he bottomed out completely. You could feel yourself fluttering around his cock as he rammed into you like no tomorrow.
His free hand traveled down to your clit and circled the throbbing bud with roughness. You shrieked against yourself, clenching tightly around his thick cock to compensate. Blindly, you are clawing at the skin on his neck and chest. Still, even when he was deep inside of you, you were terrified to look into his dark eyes.
With every thrust, you felt the way his muscles contracted against you. You felt and heard the way you drenched his cock even more with the sight. His muscles and body were the first thing that caught your eye about him to begin with, so you’re not totally surprised that you’re dripping from that.
He looks like a model. A statue. A god.
Small beads of sweat began to form on his abdomen, glazing down his chunks of muscle as he jammed harder into you. Your head hit the wall hard in ecstasy when he lowered himself to your neck and nibbled right below your ear. Every breath and groan that slipped from his mouth just sent you into overdrive and made you insane.
“I’m close,” You breathily warned, squeezing your leg tightly around him to push him even deeper. Tom groaned loudly on accident, too overpowered by the feeling of you.
“Wish I could hear your sweet sounds,” Tom mumbles as he pinches the top of your thighs to make you squeal. He resumes his attention on your clit, so he can distract himself from coming, because he knows he’s milliseconds away from absolutely losing it. “I know you’d sound so pretty screaming my name.”
“Tom,” You whimpered instead, eyes screwing closed. Your back began arching towards his buff chest and your breathing was becoming more rapid, indicating that your release was right around the corner. “I’m coming, shit.”
“Let go, love. C’mon, know you need it,” his lovely accent guided you through it with gravel encouragement. With another skillful rock of his cock, you were coming until you saw stars. Literally. Your eyes were closed so tightly that you saw little white specks in your vision. “There you go.”
Tom took that as his sign to finally relieve himself. As his thrust got sloppier, he helped you through it. With a fist to the wall and head in your shoulder, he came harshly in the condom.
Your body squirmed in his hold, already too sensitive. He gently let you stand on both feet, keeping you steady as you regained your balance. He removed the condom, tied it, and tossed it in the garbage.
“I can take out y’trash if you want me to,” Tom offered as you both slipped on your clothes. The humidity in the room seemed higher than ever, and then to put your clothes back on was just torturous.
“It’s alright, it’s not like anyone will go through it,” You reassured as you struggled to pull up your sticky leggings.
There was a moment of silence that made your heart rate pick up.You were both fully dressed and there was nothing stopping him from walking out. What was he thinking? Was he trying to find the best way to leave without being mean?
“I—” You both spoke at the same time, a flush burning your skins.
“Go ahead,” You insisted, too nervous and impatient for his response. He probably never wanted to see you again and that was fine, this was just a one-time thing that you will be thinking about occasionally. Or every day.
“Okay,” Now, Tom couldn’t seem to meet your eyes. He felt a tad nervous all of sudden as if he’d never talked to a girl before. He’s done this stuff loads of times, but he can’t help but get flustered like a school boy. “Can I… have your number? You can totally say no—”
“Yes,” You probably responded way too quickly, but you didn’t care. He wanted your number and you weren’t going to waste a second pretending to think about it. A smile grows on his face that was even bigger than his devilish smirk from earlier. “What does this mean?”
If you didn’t ask him, you would’ve been regretting it forever. You knew you wouldn't have had the courage to text him that question. What if he never even texted you, and he was just asking for your number to be nice?
“It means I’m going to text you.”
“Okay, well, thanks for clearing that up for me,” You rolled your eyes, but at least he was honest.
“Maybe ask you out too.”
“Really?” Your heart jumped on a trampoline in your chest, excitement bubbling up within you. You have been on a date in about a year, and Tom seems like a wet dream come true. You thought that maybe he wanted a friends with benefits arrangement, but a date? Is this real life?
“Yeah, if that’s something you want—”
“Yes,” You probably responded way too quickly, but you didn’t care. He wanted to take you on a freaking date and you weren’t going to waste a second pretending to think about it.
You did give him a free cardio session. The least he can do is take you out, right? What’s better than a free cardio session? Free food!
thanks for reading, this isn’t my favorite thing i’ve ever written because it felt a bit forced… so sorry about that 😭
tags: @lnmp89 @crybabyddl @pretty-npeach @marine-mayday @aerangi @justanotherpasserby-blog @tinafuentes @moniffazictress11 @eywaheardyou @alwaysclassyeagle @raajali3 @mrstealuregirl @bisexual-desi @sherlockstrangewolf @madsttx @graywrites20 @bradtomlovesya @princesspannnn @sageisswaggg @purplerose291 @girlbossnancy @lockwood-lover @theslayerofthevampires @breaxthing @eatshitanddiee
crossed out= not able to tag
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fayes-fics · 10 months
Text
Mrs Bridgerton, Again
Mrs Bridgerton Masterpost
Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader, modern AU
Summary: Modern AU, sequel to Mrs Bridgerton. This is what happened in those fateful 8 months.
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Warnings: 18+ smut, minors DNI, vaginal fingering, oral sex (m to f, f to m), cunnilingus, blowjobs, vaginal sex. Mentions of marriage, divorce, pregnancy and parenting. Lovers reunited, healing from heartbreak, second-chance love, emotions.
Word Count: 7.1 k
Summary: Requested sequel to Mrs Bridgerton from Anon, HERE, that fills in some of the time jumps of the original story, including the smut scene when they first reunite. Best to read that fic first before diving in, as this starts up immediately as she arrives in his bedroom (before the prologue). Yes, we are starting with total filth and ending with romance, lol. Thanks to @colettebronte for betaing and @eleanor-bradstreet for the gif. Oh, and by the way, in case you are not familiar, this is Eton Mess. Enjoy <3
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“Don't…,” he pants wildly, removing the hand from his cock and holding it up in a stop gesture.
You freeze, and suddenly, a wave of doubt hits you. Have you misjudged this?
“Don’t touch me, or I’ll come,” he warns. “Stay right there, and just let me look at you.”
The relief and the desire are potent. 
“Fuck, how do you look even better now?!” he sounds almost pained as he drinks in the sight of you in bra and knickers; his hands grasp the fitted bedsheet, his cock pulsing.
“Ben, I…” you stutter to begin an explanation for why you are here, mostly dumbfounded by the sight before you. Somehow, you had made yourself forget how much you love him naked. A coping mechanism, probably. Right now, you have no earthly idea why you walked away from the beautiful man before you.
“Talk later,” he intuits. “ I am so fucking glad I kept the same security code,” he rasps, and you smile.
“Same,” you whisper.
“Turn around,” he pleads. So you do, pushing up onto the balls of your feet and spinning until you face away. He groans at the view of lace straining over your bottom in just the right way. “Oh god, I need to have sex with you, but I’m so close,” he groans, and even though your back is turned, you can tell it’s through clenched teeth.
You twist to give a wicked smile over your shoulder, then unclip your bra strap as he makes a hungry noise. Pulling the straps from your shoulders and flinging the item aside, your back still turned. You hook your fingers into the sides of your knickers to pull them down but stop when he climbs off the bed, falling to his knees behind you.
“Allow me,” it's velvety and dark, and you want to bathe in that voice. 
For the first time in years, he touches your skin, and you have to lock your knees to stop swaying. Expert hands map up the outside of your legs from your ankle to your hips, long fingers hooking into the lace and tugging down. You can feel his breath warm on your cheeks as the material relents and gathers around your feet. Then he pitches forward, his nose landing on the small of your back as he takes a loud, almost obscene inhale.
“I have missed your smell,” he asserts, “not just… you know, but your skin. You.” His nose trails up slightly; warm, soft lips kiss your lumbar spine, causing goosebumps to break out over your thighs. 
“Ben…” you whisper his name, almost scared to look behind as if it’s somehow not real.
You groan as he sinks lower and runs the edge of his teeth over the globe of your left cheek. Somehow, again, you realise you'd made yourself forget how things could be between you when it was good. Feral, passionate, addictive. The best you've ever had. He has barely touched you, and your inner thighs are damp, that thronging feeling around your pelvis that needs relief.
“Mrs Bridgerton.” 
He says it. Just as you asked—wanton, thick, and sweet. And it's too much.
“I don't care if you last ten seconds; I need you inside me… please,” you plead, unashamed, grabbing your breasts as he kisses your cheek. You know how much he always loved it when you would vocalise your needs, desires, wants.
That’s when two fingers slide between your legs and, without warning, plunge into your cunt, making you cry out loudly, the sensation exhilarating, his knuckles pushing you open just the right amount, that same intoxicating feeling as before.
“Fuckkk,” he stutters against your skin. “I forgot how you cling to my fingers like this, good god.” 
You have to shoot out a hand diagonally to grab the wall, locking your elbow, as he keeps teasing with deep but slow rocking moves. You mutter his name, a shudder running through you as he hooks his fingers and hits that spot that makes you almost buckle. Sensing the weakness in your stance, his fingers withdraw, and you whimper, missing them so much.
“Go and lie on the bed,” he orders softly, squeezing your bottom, painting your dampness onto your skin as he does so.
You do as he asks, taking an arcing path, keeping your back mostly towards him so he does not see your front—an extra tease. Then you deliberately mount the bed on all fours, goading him, throwing a sinful look over your shoulder as you widen your stance, tilting your pelvis, knowing your damp thighs are shining in the late afternoon sun that floods the bed from the skylight above.
“You fucking tease,” he snarls, again sounding breathless. The sense of victory that races around your body is enthralling. “I said lay down,” he adds, the bed dipping as he climbs on behind you and spanks your cheek, making you moan.
“Well, I say you can eat me out from behind, just like this, Mr Bridgerton,” you riposte, drawing your knees higher and lowering your forehead to the mattress, the fluttering in your belly hard, the thrill of the chase so exhilarating. “Until you are ready to fuck me, that is.”
“Why the hell did we ever divorce?!” he rails.
“I have absolutely no bloody idea,” you exhale shakily, morphing into a lusty cry as his hands part your cheeks and his tongue swipes deep into your folds.
As he swirls your clit, greedily, mouth hot, you are not surprised that he has not even so much as kissed your lips before he makes you scream. Somehow, you know this is the only way a reunion would ever transpire. Primal, filthy, impossible to resist. A need to fuck before anything else. 
And it's just as good as you now remember, it all flooding back to you. You grab the bedsheet, knuckles in bony relief as you moan a litany of his name and filth you would never admit to as he growls encouraging noises. That needy, tugging deep inside as his hands band around your hips and haul you back onto his whole face, the slight stubble on his cheeks catching your labia as he does so. 
It only feels like moments until he has you dancing on the edge. It's been so, so long since anyone touched you; indeed, he was the last, and you're shocked at how little it takes. An explosive build-up of unmet needs bursting from within, like ripened fruit awaiting devourment. And that is what he is doing, devouring your body without remorse or concerns for propriety. There's an extra tinge of desperation to his movements, too, as if he needs your release as much as you do. 
Then he sucks your clit hard into his mouth and uses an edge of teeth to bite down where you ache the most. And you are gone. Muffling your screams into his mattress, biting the sheet, your pussy flutters around nothing, wanting, leaking, the static racing across your scalp and down your body, making you shudder, and your fingers and toes flex hard. 
He is vocal, so vocal, in his praise. Asking for more, pulling upright and plunging those two fingers back inside as you scream again, your body rippling in waves, fighting to expel them as he growls and pushes deeper, dragging against the place that sends you stratospheric. Your mind shuts down, your mouth snarling at him not to fucking stop in a throaty register that is all lust and instinct. He doesn’t; he strings you out until you shake and leak over his hand, eyes almost watering, deep, ragged breaths as your lungs burn.
You collapse down, your shaking legs unable to stay up on your knees anymore; his fingers withdrawing slowly as he emits a triumphant chuckle, lightly spanking your cheek for good measure as you lay face down, panting, attempting to recover.
“Fuck Ben,” you exhale raggedly. “Was it always this fucking good? Or did we just get better?”
“Honestly?” he opines as you feel him crawling over your body, covering your dewy skin with all of him as he kisses the back of your neck. “I have no idea, but I swear we must be better now.”
“No kidding… I think I almost left my body then.” 
Your giggle becomes a moan as he rocks his cock against your cleft. It's like you had forgotten that, too, which seems criminally negligent—again, probably a coping mechanism. It's sizeable, and you liquefy at the thought of taking him inside you once again.
“I’m still on the Pill,” you babble quickly, lifting your head off the pillow, “and I haven’t been with anyone since we split.” It’s your shorthand to tell him you want him to fuck you without protection.
He stills. “What?!” the tone is skeptical. “No one?!?”
You twist to look at him over your shoulder. “No. I was just thinking of dating again,” you answer abashedly as he looks bewildered.
“Wow… I thought you would have them lining up,” he exhales with a head shake. “Have you seen you?!” he adds incredulously as he shifts his stance, placing his knees wider on either side of your legs. 
“Hah! Not at all,” you deflect the compliment. “You?” you inquire as he drops stubbly kisses onto the sensitive skin of your upper back.
“Once. I was very drunk. We used a condom. It was so terrible I’m sort of pretending it never happened. I, umm, called your name,” he winces, pulling up from your body.
You roll over under him so you face him. “You did what?!”
“I… I called your name, when I came. I was thinking of you the whole time.” The matter-of-fact way he shrugs as he says so makes your chest ache.
Words fail as you realise how stubborn you have both been. If only you had talked to each other, things might have been different. On instinct, you push up and kiss him. On the mouth. A real kiss. The first in many years. And his response is instant and break-taking. He lowers you back onto the mattress as you wrap around each other, tongue entwining, breathing each other's air, hands running over each other, relearning the contours you used to know so well. 
“I didn't like the idea of fucking anyone else,” you confess quietly over his lips. “I was probably just going to be a celibate single mum.”
“You deserve better than that,” he states fiercely, shuffling so he can cradle your face with one hand and kiss your cheeks, tender and loving.
“As do you,” you answer, eyes fluttering closed under his soft kisses and caresses. 
After the utter carnality it began with, the dynamic has shifted to this slower pace—almost romantic, nostalgia swirling with a trace of trepidation of what all this could mean. So you take the initiative, needing to be rooted back in your body, in physical pleasure.
“I don't want to think anymore,” you mumble, recognising the telltale signs that he is wandering the same path. “I want to lose myself in your body.”
That handsome smile that hooked you in the first place all those years ago spreads over his face, a touch more character-filled now with the intervening couple of years but no less devastating.
“I want that too,” he concurs, moving his knees so he parts your legs, the back of your thighs sliding over the fuzzy meatiness of his quad muscles as he does so, hovering over you, engulfing you. This is what you have missed as much as anything. That feeling of being so wholly with someone else, a warm human body moving with, over, under, around you, skin and sweat, muscle and bone.  
His lips are hot and wet on your neck when he nudges your entrance and slides in with one well-angled thrust, his sense memory of how your bodies fit together. Your inhale is sharp, and your fingers grip tight around his bicep as you feel that wondrous, heartstopping moment of being invaded viscerally, pushed open, your walls clinging to him.
“Oh my god….” It’s an unintended, uncensored, gasping response that tumbles from his lips. “You are on fire,” he hisses as he bottoms out.
“You did this to me,” you avow, wanting to fan the flames, to make him burn white-hot. A clawing need to make it unforgettable.
Your lips meet as he begins to move, and you are slightly overwhelmed. Not just by the physicality as you find a wonderful rhythm moving in unison, but as if you are floating between the world of the past and the very real present. A coming home, a full circle, a reunion. You don't vocalise it, but you swear you can see it in his eyes, too, as he moves over you. His gaze holds yours as he surges into your body and withdraws again, a tidal motion that makes you cling harder, chasing the moment you break together.
It seems strange this is happening during daylight hours. It feels more like the type of illicit, smouldering passion that can only come out after dark. 
Your whole being rolls with the force of his thrusts, pleasure humming over you, so you push back, chasing sensations. Mapping the muscles of his back under your fingertips, his mouth rediscovering that weak spot on your neck that makes you shudder under him. His lips curl into a victorious smile as he surges harder, hissing as you dig your nails into his shoulder blades.
Sliding your feet higher on his luxurious soft sheets, you wrap your legs around his thighs, your heels nudging his shapely rear, letting your body plead for more. His movements become quicker as you grab one of his hands and suckle his fingers, his mouth open and gusting hot on your neck, watching you run your tongue over his fingernails. He groans as you suddenly suck them deep into your mouth, tasting the tang of your own juices and an undercurrent that is all him. When thoroughly soaked, you slowly pull those fingers from your mouth, little strings of saliva webbing between you. 
“Touch me, Ben,” you plead, pushing that hand down towards the junction of your thighs, between your bodies.
With a devastating smirk, he does just that. Fingers sliding over your engorged throbbing pearl, just the right amount of pressure to make your cunt clench around him, a vice-like grip that has his hips and fingers stuttering to a halt.
“Fuck, do that again,” he begs.
With a smirk, you oblige, squeezing your internal muscles tight in a slow pulsing motion. His cock feels huge, hard, and heavy as you do so. 
His eyes close, and a shudder you can feel runs through him, buried to the root, feeling his cock pulse heavily.
Then his eyes fly open, and the intensity there takes you aback as his fingers start to swirl at a dizzying pace, restarting his thrusts, urgent now, hunched over you, enveloping you, the air between your bodies hot and clammy as he pushes intently, pleading with you to come for him. 
Your lips meet in an artless but deep kiss, tongues dancing, desperate hot breaths into each other's mouths. His fingers circling your clit pushes you towards your peak, the catalyst you need. The telltale ripples deep inside, clamping your body to his, his cries at the intensity fading as you are swept away, your vision whiting out. Ripples fan out to every fibre, that addictive mind-numbing bliss like nothing else.
You clenching on him is what pulls him over the edge, too. His grip on you is rough; his mouth slack on your cheek, curling his whole body into you as he cums, the warmth of it blooming deep. 
No words are spoken as he collapses onto you, panting hard. As he recovers, you bury your fingers in his hair, massaging his scalp until he is almost purring into your skin. 
“Why the hell did we divorce?” you echo his line from earlier, and his responding laughter shakes your whole being.
Ravenous, after your exertions, he orders food delivery, insisting you both stay naked as you eat on the living room rug. Dusk slips to nighttime as you watch mindless, entertaining shows, chatting easily about everything and nothing, wrapped around each other like a vine, drinking excellent wine, and feeding each other. 
He reaches for dessert, Eton Mess, and with a cheeky eyebrow raise, smears it over your naked breasts, using his tongue to thoroughly clean you up and tease you beyond distraction. Before you know it, he is covered, too, and you blow him right there, licking whipped cream from his leaking cock as his thighs tremble under your hands in that endearing way you remember. Before he comes, he begs you to stop, to ride him, and so you do - messy, sticky, giggling - right there on his living room floor, the rug abraiding your kneecaps, his large hands a vice around your hips.
“We definitely need to shower,” he opines as he watches you extract a shard of strawberry from his belly button as his cock slips from your body. You laugh in agreement as he reaches up and pulls a fleck of meringue from your hair.
Collapsing into bed with shower-warm skin, half an hour later, you fall asleep in an embrace.
The following morning
You awaken to his lips on your cheek, pulling you back into the curve of his body. 
“Spend the day with me,” he implores, his voice rough with sleep. 
“I want to,” you hum drowsily, reaching back to run your fingers through his luscious head of hair.
“Go on, be daring,” he goads into your skin. “Mrs Bridgerton,” he adds coquettishly, knowing those are now the magic words to make you do as he wants.
“Stop weaponising that,” you scold lazily, with zero vehemence.
“Not a chance,” he chuckles, rolling you onto your back and crawling over you, arms bracketing your shoulders, his mouth a lazy, lopsided grin. He looks positively angelic, his riot of hair backlit like a halo in the morning light leaking through the skylight. Even as he does the sinful thing of rocking his rigid cock against the apex of your thighs teasingly. Just as you push your legs out wider, welcoming him, he stills and instead reaches over and grabs your phone from the bedside table, handing it to you with a pointed look.
So you call in sick to work. 
As a reward, he slips under the covers as you are apologising to your boss with a fake croaky voice and slides his tongue deep into you; you have to fake a coughing fit to disguise your groan. You grab a fist of his hair in silent reprimand, but it just seems to spur him on.
“If you had to call work today, I would have you in my mouth as revenge for that,” you slur as he works his magic, knowing he has gone freelance in the intervening years.
“I’ll happily put in a call to myself later,” he jokes unseen under the sheet, “and you can do as you wish while I tell myself I'm taking the day off.”
“Self-employment must be fun,” you comment wistfully, then cry out as he sucks so hard on your clit that you knock your phone off the bed, your leg kicking out so strong that he grabs it and pins you down.
“It has its perks,” his voice muffled into your body, “like I can spend all day right here… well, at least until you need some breakfast.”
You can't even form a response to that as his tongue spears into you; all you can do is hiss in agreement.
A little while later, Benedict is pulling ingredients out of the fridge to make brunch when your phone vibrates on his kitchen island.
“Oh god, it’s El,” you fret, putting down the cafetière you had just poured from.
“Why is she calling you?” he frowns.
“I was supposed to go on a date last night that she arranged,” you wince. “My very first one. But someone completely derailed that plan, didn't they?” you pout comically.
He chuckles. “Put it on speaker; this should be fun.”
“You had better have a damn good excuse for standing Dan up last night,” Eloise complains in lieu of a greeting.
“Well, good morning to you too, El,” you reply lightheartedly, taking a sip of coffee.
“Why does it sound so echoey?” 
“You're on speaker while I make brunch.” It’s a slight lie; he’s the one making it; you are simply enjoying the view. Seeing as he is doing so in black boxer briefs and nothing more, your eyes mapping his torso with a covetous stare.
“Well, I'm waiting…” she points out.
“For what?” You giggle as Benedict pulls up behind you, crowding into your body, wrapping his arms around your waist, and planting a kiss on your temple. You sway slightly with his movement.
“For your excuse, and it better be a good one. That you are in a hospital somewhere, or you met the love of your life yesterday,” she warns, “and seeing as you are making brunch when you should be at work, I doubt it’s the former.”
“Maybe it’s the latter,” you breathe, her not realising how true that suggestion is, twisting your head to look at him, and he shoots you a molten look before your lips meet.
“Really? You met someone else?” her tone suddenly excited, forgetting her annoyance.
“It took me completely by surprise.” You exhale over his lips, and he smiles that crooked smile that makes your stomach flip. 
“So… wait, are you at home?” she asks, suddenly very invested.
“Nope,” you pop the p in the word, and Benedict shakes with silent laughter, tilting his head to kiss down your neck, your hand sliding into his hair as you lean into his movements. God, he is good at this.
“Are you at his place?” she hisses, impressed.
“Maybe” you singsong.
“Take me off speaker, you nutter!”
“Why? Maybe he is enjoying hearing this,” you tease.
“He’s right there?” Eloise spits, disbelieving.
“Hello, El,” Benedict pipes up, between kisses of your skin, his warm fingers tugging on the knot of the borrowed silk dressing gown you wear. It's dark blue and swamps you, seeing as it's his.
“Ben?!?!” she splutters. “What the…? How the…? Whattttt?!?!”
“I'm hanging up the phone now, sister,” he rumbles as he opens your robe and slides it off your shoulders so you are naked. “Unless you want to listen to us making love over this kitchen island?” 
“Oh fuck no,” she positively shudders and makes a retching sound. “Wait… you guys….what the…?”
“Don’t tell anyone yet, please,” your request squeaks, his erection pressing into the naked valley of your buttocks as he reaches in front of you to end the call.
“Goodbye, El,” Benedict laughs.
“You have a fuck tonne of explaining to d….,” her warning is cut off by him hanging up.
“She's going to be insufferable when she gets over the shock,” you point out and then sigh as his hands land on your hips and his warm, damp mouth is on your shoulder.
“A problem for another time,” he assures you as you feel him release you briefly to push down his underwear. He's now as naked as you.
“You meant it about the kitchen island then?” you simper over your shoulder and groan as he surges his cock between your thighs from behind. 
“What do you think?” he teases, his voice pitched so low it echoes around his whole body and into yours.
“I think I could get used to this,” you whisper as he leans you forward over the cooling quartz surface and pushes aside your hair to suck insistently on your neck.
“Good,” he rumbles, “because I am going to fuck you right here every morning before breakfast.”
“Every morning?” Your breath hitching at the idea this might be something more than a one-time moment of madness.
“Oh yes,” he murmurs into your skin, “I want to spend every moment I can with you, beside you, inside you,” his tone smoky, and with that last word, he slips inside you, your responding moan so loud he huffs amused. “The noises you make, it's the same as years ago, so exquisite,” he smiles into your hair, the heated stretch as he opens you up, always so breathtaking.
“Feels so good,” you pant lightly as he bottoms out inside you—a solid weight pressing in all the right places.
“Yes, you do, my love,” the term of endearment slipping from his lips so casually, sounding so perfectly natural to your ears, you reach back and grab his left hand in yours, missing the sound your wedding rings used to make when you did so in days of old.
But then he starts to move inside you, and there are no more coherent thoughts in your head—just his name tumbling from your lips and his hands moulded to your body.
Nine weeks later
The hardest person to explain it all to is your daughter. 
Everything snowballed so fast after that fateful day, you and Benedict spending every spare moment you could together—even sneaking into each other's homes after Emilia’s bedtime. It was no longer just sex; it was something much, much more. It's when she awakes one night and almost catches sight of him working in your home office while you sleep that you both realise the time has come.
Benedict turns up at your place as agreed. You open the door to him and place a lingering kiss on his cheek as he sweeps in, holding a bunch of your favourite flowers and a gift bag for Emilia containing all her favourite sweets. 
“Bribery, what a genius idea,” you laugh quietly into his ear, knowing Emilia can see you both from her vantage point at the dining table, doing some colouring in.
“Daddy!” she calls out effusively when she looks up, jumping out of her chair and running over.
Benedict hands you the flowers and gift to pick up Emilia, swinging her up into his arms as her little hands wrap around his neck.
“What are you doing here?” her ask is one of happy confusion. “It's not one of your days.”
“Indeed it's not,” he smiles indulgently as you reach over and tuck a rogue strand of hair behind her ear. “Mummy and I here have some important news,” he adds, looking at you askance with an almost bashful smile.
“Let’s all go and sit,” you suggest, gesturing towards the living room as you place the flowers and gift bag on the kitchen island. Emilia won't release her grip, so Benedict walks with her in his arms. She only lets go when he reaches the sofa, snuggling against him as soon as he sits, grabbing one of her favourite cuddly toys from the sectional arm as she does so.
“I'm so happy you are here, Daddy,” she beams, and you already feel misty-eyed as he subconsciously places a hand over his heart and agrees with her sentiment.
You initially take a seat on the chaise at an angle from them, but Benedict shoots you a puzzled puppy dog look and pats the cushion next to him. So, with slight apprehension, you swing around to sit next to him, and he slides a hand onto your knee, which doesn't go unnoticed by your eagle-eyed daughter on his other side.
“Why are you touching Mummy like that?” she frowns. A tiny part of your heart cracking at the realisation that she has never known the love you once shared—the one you are rebuilding slowly, piece by piece, day by day.
“Remember I said that Mummy and I have some news?” Benedict begins softly, his long fingers wrapping all the way around to caress the crease at the back of your knee, a nervous tick of his you recall like a ghost from the past.
“Yes...” she responds warily, tugging on the ears of her toy, instinctively concerned.
“Well… Mummy and I have been spending time together as we used to when you were a baby,” he explains slowly, “and we really like each other again.” His lips twitch a beguiling smile as he turns briefly to look at you, his earnest face melting the anxious lump burning behind your ribs. “That means we touch each other and hug and kiss.”
“Emilia,” you join in, your voice a little tremulant. “How would you feel if Mummy and Daddy started spending time with you together rather than apart?”
She perks up, and she stops her fidgeting. “Really?” the hopeful tone makes your emotions bubble up again.
“Yes, really,” he replies. 
“Every evening?” her hands clapping together with glee, climbing wholly into Benedict's lap. “Please, mummy?” she begs, the eyes she inherited from him pleading with you insistently as if the decision rests purely with you.
“If that is what you both want, then yes,” you offer tentatively, your look drifting from her to him.
“I want nothing more in the whole world,” he states sincerely, his gaze never leaving yours, his Adam's apple bobbing with a thick swallow as he does so. You can’t look away from those soulful eyes, wanting nothing more than to kiss him.
“Do you love Mummy, Daddy?” Emilia cuts in, breaking the hypnotic trance, looking at him expectantly.
“I never stopped,” he confesses truthfully, the hand on your knee feeling weightier somehow, the lump in your chest appearing again, but this time it's the furthest thing from anxiety. “We just lost our way for a little while, that’s all,” he says as much for you as your daughter. “Everything is working out as it always should have,” he ends, his tone wavering with emotion.
“Will we all live together?” she enthuses.
“Yes,” you breathe, barely believing it yourself. It's something you had discussed just a few days ago, the realisation this was very real coming to you both. “We will. Soon. We just have some things to sort out first.”
“Where would you prefer to live, Emilia?” Benedict queries. “We will keep both houses for now. So you can decide for Mummy and Daddy.”
“Is this where you lived when I was a baby?” she asks, pointing at the ground.
“No darling, Daddy and I sold that when we split up as part of the agreement we signed.” You see him wince at the memory, his fingers gripping your knee tighter reflexively. “But that is okay; that is the past. We want somewhere better for our future together anyway,” you assure, feeling the weight of his doting stare as you speak but keeping your attention fixed on Emilia.
She nods sagely, her little brain absorbing everything you say with the fearsome intellect she possesses. Then she swings over the arm Benedict has looped around your knee and clambers limbfully into your lap. You accept her embrace, grateful and relieved, Benedict's arm releasing your knee to slide behind your head, grabbing your shoulder, and pulling you both into his arms. 
“I think we should all live here,” she nods decisively. “I like my room here better than at Daddy's; it's bigger,” she explicates, a touch sheepishly. 
Benedict and you laugh together at her flawless reasoning, your heart melting as he nuzzles into your hair.
“I do believe the lady has spoken,” he chuckles, his lips grazing your ear.
And thus, it is decided.
Two weeks later
You ask Emilia to keep the news under wraps until her sixth birthday party two weeks later. Agreeing that if she does, she could be the one to break the news to your families—a bribe, indeed, but an effective one. Eloise is the only person with any inkling and has seemingly kept it secret, so this will likely be shocking news to many.
The night before the party, after Emilia is safely tucked up in bed, you are sharing a bath in your oversized tub.
“Is there anything else we need for tomorrow?” his question lazy as you lean back against him, his hands rubbing soothing circles over your tummy under the water.
“Hmmm, the cake and balloons should be delivered in the morning; I think everything is in hand,” you hum, closing your eyes and resting on his shoulder.
“I was thinking…” he begins.
“Uh oh…” You interject cheekily, popping your eyes open as he tickles your diaphragm in playful retaliation.
“Yes, yes, I know, brains are your thing…” he grumbles good-naturedly, “but I was thinking long-term; perhaps we should start to look for a new place? If we sell both of ours, we could get something nice right around here, with a big garden for Emilia, perhaps a home office and art studio space for me. And you know…. more bedrooms,” the last two words uttered in a throatier register, those fingers spidering lower under the water into the patch of hair at the apex of your thighs.
“More kids?” your breath catching.
“Yes, didn't we always say we would have three?” he murmurs, his lips on your earlobe, sucking gently. Weirdly, the discussion of it all - buying a place together, having more kids - seems entirely natural, not jarring, even though you are less than three months into your new dynamic.
“That was when we were in our twenties, Ben,” you point out, but it fades into a hitching, needy sound in the back of your throat as his lips map the cord of your neck and his fingertips slide over your clit. 
“And are you saying at the ripe old age of thirty-four, we are past it?” he checks, bemused.
“Thirty-three for me, thirsty five for you, old man,” you point out, attempting a dry tone but mostly just breathy as he teases you expertly.
“I was averaging,” he states, pressing harder so you moan loudly.
“You are never average,” you flatter, rapidly losing the ability to converse.
“I love how I can just shut off that brain of yours doing this,” he exhales gustily into your ear, his fingers circling insistently.
“Shut up and fuck me,” you groan.
“With pleasure,” he simpers, suddenly looping his arms around your knees to pull you open so he can slip inside you.
The following day
Emilia can barely contain the secret as the various members of the frankly enormous Bridgerton clan arrive. Your family, consisting of your parents and just one sister, is tiny in comparison, even as she strolls in with her boisterous boys and harried-looking husband in tow.
“What is with Emilia today?” she queries, ever the sharp observer, as she hands you a cheese board she has brought.
“Birthday excitement?” you shrug, finding a space for her contribution on the snack table as you attempt to sound non-committal.
“Hmm,” her mien thoughtful, “it seems more than that. I wished her a happy birthday, and her response was, ‘Oh, thank you, auntie, I almost forgot.’”
“I'm sure she was joking,” you placate. “Help me plate up the sausage rolls?” An intentional distraction. “Colin just turned up; I'm not sure the hundred I have baked are enough.”
A couple of hours later, food has been consumed, the birthday song has been sung loudly, and the cake cut and eaten. Music plays in the garden, and an alarmingly large gaggle of kids are all bouncing over-zealously in the small bouncy castle you have rented as Benedict materialises at your side. It seems strange that his hands do not slide around your waist, but the announcement has yet to be public, so he maintains a respectful distance.
“You think there is a child capacity on that thing?” You nod at the colourful inflatable taking up a good third of your compact garden.
“Simon claims to have it in hand,” he breezes.
“And you believe him?” you skew your mouth into a slant.
“He’s rich enough; he can pay everyone off if there are injuries,” Benedict smirks, and you can't help but giggle into your wine glass.
Just then, Emilia comes running towards you, out of breath from bouncing. “Is it time, Mummy, Daddy?” she effuses. 
Sharing a glance, you nod, and Benedict fishes his phone out of his pocket to turn down the music, then borrows your wine glass, tapping a knife against it to draw everyone's attention.
“Everyone,” he calls, “our beautiful birthday girl has a different but very special announcement.”
All the adults turn their attention, even as the excited childish squeals from the bouncy castle continue in the background. 
“Mummy and Daddy have some news they want me to share,” she begins as your eyes drift over to Eloise. 
“What could it possibly be, Emilia?” Eloise goads, her face so smug you almost want to shake her. You settle for a pointed stare instead.
“Mummy and Daddy… are in love again!!!!” Emilia yells. “We are moving in as a family!” She then bows deeply for her assembled audience, no doubt expecting rapturous applause.
The assembled, shocked, and quiet faces confuse her, and she twists to look at you both for reassurance. “Did I do it wrong?” she asks, her little face screwing up in confusion. 
“No, no darling, it was perfect,” you reassure, stroking her hair. 
Benedict reaches down and hauls her into his arms, giving her the comfort she needs, and she buries her face in his neck, her translucent costume fairy wings slightly obscuring his face from everyone.
“Are you serious?” Kate pipes up cautiously as if a spokesperson for all those gathered, Anthony shooting her an incredulous sideways look that she, of course, completely ignores.
“Yes,” Benedict confirms, shuffling Emilia sideways to his hip and wrapping the arm not holding her around your back. “About three months ago, we were reunited by accident.” Gratefully, he fogs over the details. You are not sure a misdialed masturbation call should be the start of any anecdote at a family gathering. “And… things progressed rather rapidly,” he admits, giving you a quick sideways smile and a squeeze of your waist, “and here we are…”
“You’re in love again?” Violet checks, her hands clenched hopefully over her heart.
“Yes,” you nod to her, turning back to look at Benedict, “very, very much so.” 
She starts the applause, which soon ripples out to everyone as they absorb the news. From over by the bouncy castle, there is a supportive whistle from Simon as he effortlessly frees one of his offspring wedged in an upside-down position before giving the thumbs up.
Benedict nuzzles your temple, and you know you are blushing as he echoes a gentle “very, very much so” in your ear before the assembled masses move in to offer you their congratulations in turn.
Twelve weeks later
You are idly clicking through houses on Rightmove on a Tuesday evening when a wave of nausea hits you so violently that you barely make it to the downstairs cloakroom toilet in time. Same as the previous day.
“I’m never letting you convince me that tacos from a food truck are a good idea, ever again,” you grouse as you re-emerge into the hallway after splashing your face and rinsing your mouth.
“We ate the same thing on Sunday, and I’m perfectly fine,” he points out as he reaches the bottom step of the staircase, having finished reading Emilia's bedtime story.
“Well, I'm sick as a parrot,” you lament, dabbing your forehead with a damp flannel you snagged. “And I'm so hot. I've been feeling off for two days on the trot. Mornings and evenings. I swear I've been poisoned…”
He suddenly goes very still, and your brow knits.
“What?” Your confusion grows as he appears to be doing mental arithmetic, touching his fingers.
“Aren’t you late?” he says quietly, looking up from his hands with the oddest but sweetest expression.
“What do you… Oh…” you trail off, and suddenly, your whole body runs even hotter.
OH.
“Are you?” his whisper so hopeful but reticent.
“I… I could be…” You stutter, a little blindsided. It's the best you can offer. 
He pulls you into him, surrounding you, cupping your jaw, his eyes always so expressive. “We should find out,” he murmurs.
“The big Sainsbury's should still be open,” you blurt, unsure of what else to say.
He tilts his forehead against yours with an amused huff at your eminent practicality. “You stay here with Emilia; I’ll go,” he smiles, kissing your lips tenderly before backing away and grabbing his wallet and car keys from the hallway table.
Within the hour, you are staring at a white and blue stick again. Dumbfounded by the news, just as you were almost seven years ago.
“Fuck me…” You sigh under your breath, belatedly realising you really shouldn't have been as cavalier with your Pill taking; now you are having sex regularly again.
“I think that's the probable cause, yes,” he jests softly, charmingly treading on eggshells until he can fully gauge your reaction.
You break into giggles, rolling your eyes but collapsing into his arms, and his relief is palpable. 
“I know it's so soon, and we only talked about it in theory… but…. God, I’m so happy,” he admits into your hair, pulling back to look in your eyes. “Are you?”
“I'm feeling a million different things,” you answer honestly, then reach up to hold his face, “but yes, I'm happy, Ben. A little shocked, considering I thought it was just bad tacos, but happy.”
His responding smile is sunlight and pure devotion.
“I love you,” he declares, heartfelt, simple, genuine. It's not remotely the first time he has done so since you reunited, but it feels particularly appropriate.
“I love you too.”
Two weeks later
Benedict takes you to dinner in Covent Garden after a house viewing. You both know it’s the one you will buy. A handsome Victorian detached with dual bay windows that felt like home the minute you walked in, even before you laid eyes on the expansive mature gardens and the all-glass extension that would be the perfect art studio for him.
Only when you stroll past a fancy bank after dinner do you clock the date on a glowing display; it's the anniversary of the fateful day you met at a party seven years ago. 
But, fifteen minutes later, it's still a complete surprise when he gets down on one knee, Thamesside, the city twinkling around you.
“Marry me once more, y/n? Please? Be Mrs Bridgerton, again?” 
There was only ever going to be one answer.
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Benedict taglist: @makaylan @foreverlonginguniverse @iboopedyournose @colettebronte @aintnuthinbutahounddog @severewobblerlightdragon @margofiore @writergirl-2001 @heeyyyou @enichole445 @enchantedbytomandhenry @ambitionspassionscoffee @chaoticcalzoneranchsports @nikaprincessofkattegat @baebee35 @crowleysqueenofhell @bridgertontess @fiction-is-life @lilacbeesworld @angels17324 @broooookiecrisp @queen-of-the-misfit-toys @eleanor-bradstreet @divaanya @musicismyoxygen84 @benedictspaintbrush @miindfucked @sorryallonsy @lilithseve @cayt0123 @hottytoddyhistory @truly-dionysus @fictionalmenloversblog @zinzysstuff @malpalgalz @panhoeofmanyfandoms @kinokomoonshine @causeimissu @delehosies @m-rae23 @last-sheep @kmc1989 @desert-fern @starkeylover @corpseoftrees-queen @jeanfreau @magical-spit @bunnyweasley23
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landwriter · 1 year
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Desperate Measures | Dream/Hob | 1.2K | G v silly and fluffy, literally 90% air, dream attempts a romantic gesture, hob is a sap and forgetful, human au, part text fic
for @domaystic drabbles, Day 6: Under the Same Umbrella
---
Dream woke up to 26 texts from Hob. He put on his glasses and began his morning read. It’d replaced Times for him. The editorial quality, he thought, was far superior.
Hob (7:19 am) heading out, gave you a wee forehead kiss and you didn’t even stir. sleeping bloody beauty. love you disgustingly much x
Hob (7:26 am) couldn’t find my umbrella anywhere can you take a look if it’s not too much of a bother? feel like i’ve gone mad
Hob (7:30 am) christ it’s bucketing down!! standing under the eaves just to tell you how much it’s bucketing down
plants will be happy at least so will my goth boyfriend ;) hope your writing goes well today love. extra atmosphere!!
Hob (8:42 am) nevermind don’t look for it remembered that i left it in my office told johanna she can use it since i’m at the archives all day anyway glad i’m not the only one who’d forget their own head if it wasn’t screwed on :) :) :)
Hob (10:11 am) you should’ve seen the look lisa gave me when i showed up had to dry myself off in the men’s w half a forest of paper towels there goes my carbon offset from walking i said christ you’re probably still in bed asleep warm dry!! lucky bastard
wish i could come back already and drip puddles all over you
Hob (10:37 am) if this keeps up i’m going to look like mr darcy in the rain on your doorstep tonight don’t worry i promise not to propose marriage while insulting you xx although i do love you most ardently
...elizabeth
Dream smiled, read them all again, contemplated, and then sent his reply.
Dream (11:01 am) Sir, I appreciate the struggle you have been through
Hob replied moments later.
?? you sound like a customer service agent wait you’re quoting the film you can’t reject me if i’ve not proposed to you!! yet!!!
Dream snorted. 'and I am very sorry I have caused you pain' went the line. They’d watched it last weekend. Hob had cried, and Dream had privately decided that if Hob proposed, he’d say yes. Even if it was poorly done. It wouldn’t be, though. Not if Hob was doing it. He sent a second text.
...and I am very sorry you were drenched by rain.
Then he got out of bed and shuffled into the kitchen. His phone buzzed anew as he made tea and toast. He smiled at the sound. On their first date, Hob had warned Dream that he had a bad habit of annoying boyfriends over text. Dream, on his first date in six years, had wondered what it might be like to be so effusively charming that you could have enough boyfriends to form habits around them at all. He hadn’t known what to say, and Hob had ducked his head, grimacing a little, and said, “Just tell me to piss off, please, if I do? I know I can be a bit much.”
Dream believed it, because the man was telling him about his habits with boyfriends after one date. Not that he minded. And three months in, Dream had yet to tell him to piss off.
Turns out, a bit much was exactly what he’d wanted. Needed, in truth. Someone to tether him to the real world. His phone had become a modern-day lodestone in his pocket, a comforting pull of Hob-ness that would always point him back to life whenever he’d emerge, blinking and disoriented, out of the mire of his work. Work that he loved - creating worlds out of nothing, writing stories that would change people - but, coming on the age of thirty with nothing to show for it but recurring wrist strain and an upmarket flat that never had any guests, work that had also made him spend so much time apart from the rest of humanity that he was sometimes unsure how to rejoin it.
The tipping point had been when his eldest sister had found out that he hadn’t spoken to anyone else in between two of their regular dinners. Which were monthly. It had been mortifying. She’d smiled sadly, which was excruciating enough, and then gotten the gleam of a plan in her eyes, which had been far worse. “I’m setting you up,” she’d said. “I know just the guy. We go way back. I think you’ll like him.”
He had. Now, when his phone buzzed, he found himself frowning if it wasn’t Hob. (An exceedingly rare occasion.) But this time it was, of course. Four short messages sent one after the other:
hahahaha ok fine that was v good enjoy your day x
Five hours later, not even the curtain of rain awaiting him outside could douse the anticipation in his belly. An idea, he knew, was a powerful thing. Dream didn’t have an umbrella - Hob always shared with him, and would’ve apologetically nicked his if he had - so he would make the first leg of the journey as Hob did. He intended to go and get something nice, but once in the cold downpour, his resolve failed him almost at once, and he ducked into the first shop that had umbrellas in the window.
“Hiya,” said the girl at the counter without looking up from her phone.
Dream ignored her, blinking the rain out of his eyes, belatedly registering all the merchandise had a unifying theme and that he’d made a terrible mistake, borne of sheer desperation.
“Would you happen to have any other umbrellas? In black?” he asked. Hidden behind the counter, perhaps. If only you knew to ask.
The girl looked at him with an air of disbelieving reproval only accessible to teenagers and the very elderly. “You could try Boots, you know. It’s just down the street.”
Dream looked out the window. Rain torrented down. Commuters hurried past with their sensibly coloured umbrellas. From places exactly like Boots.
“Or we’ve got rain ponchos,” she added. It sounded like a threat.
“Nevermind,” said Dream quickly. “I’ll take it.”
“Enjoy your visit in London, sir,” she called out as he left.
He stepped outside and flicked open the umbrella with slightly more force than necessary.
Dream waited a few paces outside the archives, wanting to surprise Hob properly. Two separate pairs of tourists had thought he was their London Ghost Tours guide, and he was beginning to regret not holding out for longer, drenching be damned. Then Hob emerged, striding out and immediately stopping to pull out his phone. He was smiling at it. Dream smiled too, in anticipation.
A moment later his own phone buzzed loudly in his coat pocket, and Hob looked up in surprise.
“Oh my god,” he said. Then he said it again.
“I heard you needed an umbrella,” said Dream. He’d had the line already, since he got the idea. It had been very dashing and romantic in his head. It was somewhat undermined by the dreadful costuming choice that had been forced upon him.
Hob looked between Dream and the umbrella, bafflement melting into a happy laugh. He ducked underneath, pecking Dream on the lips. “I’m not sure I needed one quite this badly. Did you rob some poor tourist?”
“Unhappily, I paid for this.”
“Oh no,” said Hob, pulling away and pretending to inspect him for injury. “My poor darling. Your dignity.”
Dream sniffed. “I will recover.”
“Here,” said Hob. “I’ll carry it for you. You’ll only be guilty by association, then.”
They began walking, a bobbing Union Jack in a sea of blacks and greys. After the chief sin of ugliness, it was also a little small for two grown men, but Dream found he didn’t resent that at all, as Hob tucked him tightly into his side to keep them both dry. People gave them a wide berth. Tourists could never be trusted with umbrellas.
“You’ve rescued me, you know,” said Hob, nuzzling into his cheek.
“It wouldn’t do to have you dripping puddles all over the floors,” said Dream.
“Even if I looked terribly handsome, all wet and ardent?”
Dream bit his lip and smiled a little. “Perhaps you can be wet and ardent in the shower. Instead.”
Hob laughed again. It was Dream’s favourite sound. “Much warmer than the rain anyway. Deal.” Rain drummed down on their private nylon ceiling. “I was thinking chicken tikka masala for dinner?”
And so they made their way home, and although the rain never let up, Dream was so content and warm that he might’ve sworn they were walking in the sun.
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chelseachilly · 5 months
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do you want to build a snowman?
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pairing: reader x ben chilwell request: "ok so you and ben have a daughter around 3 or 4 and its her first time seeing snow so they take her outside to build a snowman :)" - anonymous warnings: fluffff, dad!ben word count: 2k
author’s note: thanks for all the requests!! i'm really getting in the flow of writing rn (and inspired by the holidays) so i'm going to do my best to write as many of them as i can! ❄️
-
“Is Daddy gonna be home soon?”
It’s not the first - or the second, or the fifth - time your daughter has asked this question since she woke up this morning. 
Ben left for training shortly before 8, and neither you nor your daughter Sophie were awake yet. You could’ve happily slept a few more hours, but Sophie woke you up not long after to excitedly announce that it had snowed overnight.
In her four years of life, your daughter has never seen a significant amount of snow, at least that she can recall. It snowed quite a bit on her first Christmas, but she was far too little to remember that, and since then there’s been nothing but a few flurries here and there or a light dusting on the rooftops.
She’s quite fascinated by the concept from watching movies and TV shows featuring winter activities and is currently deep in a Frozen phase, which means she’s obsessed with the idea of building a snowman. 
Over the past month as the weather got colder, you and Ben had tried to keep her expectations low as you weren’t sure you would get enough snow to make this dream a reality. You could tell it was killing Ben to disappoint her - he hates denying his little girl anything - and a few nights ago you caught him looking into booking a holiday to Switzerland or Finland or anywhere she would be guaranteed some snow.
Thankfully, today her prayers were answered, and you were fully prepared to bundle up and go outside with her before you even had your coffee, but she insisted on waiting for Ben. It was their plan to build the snowman together, Sophie told you, and she stuck to her decision even when you reminded her he wouldn’t be home for hours.
It‘s been pretty adorable watching her anxiously await her dad’s return all morning, pacing around the house and checking for his car in the driveway often. You can tell how badly she wants to go out and play in the glistening white snow, and the remarkable restraint she’s showing is a testament to how much of a daddy’s girl she is. 
“Not too much longer, sweetheart,” you assure her as you beckon her to come cuddle with you on the couch where you’re doing a bit of work on your laptop. “He texted a while ago and said he’ll be here as soon as he can.”
“Alright,” Sophie sighs. “Can you put on Frozen?”
You’ve watched this movie more times than you can count lately, and once already today, but you remind yourself that you signed up for this when you chose to be a parent as you’re queuing up Disney Plus once again. 
Later, when you’re nearing the end of the film and you’ve given up on doing any more work as long as your daughter is screaming the lyrics to each song, you hear the sound of the front door opening and closing. 
“Daddy!”
The movie is quickly abandoned as Sophie darts toward the foyer to greet Ben. You’re not too far behind her, though by the time you reach them she’s already in her dad’s arms.
“Daddy, it snowed!” Sophie exclaims, her little arms wrapped around Ben’s neck. “We have to build a snowman!”
“I know, darling,” Ben laughs, giving Sophie another squeeze before gently setting her down. “Why don’t you go get your coat on while I say hello to Mummy?”
Sophie nods and eagerly runs toward the closet to fetch her winter coat. As Ben drops his bag and makes his way over to you, you can see how tired he is from training. When he cups your face to give you a kiss, you can tell he’s also freezing. 
“How was training, baby?” you murmur, placing your hands on his to warm them up. 
“Cold,” Ben sighs. “Forgot how brutal it is training in the snow. I’m glad the gaffer let us go home early, though.”
“You and me both,” you smile, leaning in to kiss him again. “Maybe you should warm up a bit before going out to play with Soph?”
“No, she’s been waiting for me all day,” Ben says. “I’ll be fine.”
You know there’s no changing his mind, especially when Sophie comes running back into the room in her adorable little puffer jacket that nearly swallows her whole. You help her zip it up and grab mittens, a scarf and a hat to keep her warm, as well as some for you and Ben. 
Once you’re all ready to face the cold, you head out to the garden together. You and Ben have matching grins on your faces as you watch Sophie excitedly run through the snow for the first time, a core childhood memory being created right before your eyes. 
She gets to work right away on her snowman, rolling the snowball she’s formed as long as she can before it gets too heavy for her and she has to accept Ben’s help. 
You join in on their efforts, occasionally taking a break to take some photos of your daughter and husband that you already know are going to be your new phone background.
After some hard work - certainly for a four year old - the snowman is completed with a carrot nose and hat that you had prepared just for this occasion. 
“He looks great, Sophie!” you exclaim. “What’s his name? Olaf?”
Despite it being a fairly safe guess, Sophie looks at you like you have two heads.
“No, Mummy, Olaf doesn’t have a hat,” she reminds you very matter-of-factly. “His name is Tom.”
“Like Uncle Tom?” Ben chuckles, referring to his best friend and her godfather.
Sophie seems to contemplate this for a moment before shaking her head.
“No, because I want him to be Tom.”
You and Ben look at each other for a moment before bursting out into laughter. You both blame your daughter’s stubbornness on each other, though deep down you know it’s from both of you, but at times like this it’s both hilarious and adorable. 
“Fair enough, sweetie,” you say, bending down to give her a kiss on the forehead. “Now, I think some hot chocolate is in order. Ready to go in?”
“No, we have to make snow angels!”
Of course, this was another activity she had seen in films that she was dying to try for herself. 
“Alright,” you chuckle. “Why don’t we make snow angels while Daddy goes and warms up? He’s been out in the snow all day.”
The pout on Sophie’s face quickly tells you that she is not happy with this plan, and Ben swoops in before you can say anything else.
“I think I have a few snow angels left in me,” he smiles, picking Sophie up and balancing her on his hip. “Babe, can you start the hot chocolate while we finish up here?”
You raise an eyebrow at your husband but accept his proposal nonetheless, placing a quick kiss on both his and Sophie’s cheeks before heading inside. 
As you’re warming up the milk on the stovetop, you look out the window where Ben and Sophie are still playing, her excited giggles loud enough that you can hear her through the windowpane. 
Your heart is threatening to burst from the sweet scene, overflowing with love for your daughter and admiration for your amazing husband. No matter how tired he is from training, if he’s upset about a loss or injured or anything else, he always steps up for Sophie. You’ve known since you met him that he would be a great dad, but ever since you became parents, he’s continued to exceed your expectations.
Just as you’re pouring three steaming mugs of hot chocolate, you hear your family come in through the back door and begin to strip off their winter gear. 
To your delight, Sophie runs straight into the kitchen and hugs you tightly.
“I made five snow angels!” she exclaims as you run your hand up and down her back in an effort to warm her up. “Daddy made some big ones, too.”
“That’s amazing, love,” you smile, kissing her head. “You want some hot chocolate?”
“Yes! Can I put the marshmallows in?”
“Of course,” you say, lifting her up onto the counter and passing her the bag of mini marshmallows.
As much as she’s a daddy’s girl at heart, you also get your fair share of moments when your daughter seems to only want her mother. You know how special her bond is with Ben, and you really can’t blame her for how much she loves spending time with him, but you still cherish the little things that just for the two of you - making hot chocolate with extra marshmallows being one of them. 
You carry the tray of drinks into the living room with Sophie trailing behind, and find Ben already there getting the fireplace going and arranging some pillows and blankets.
“This looks cozy,” you smile, setting the drinks down and sitting on the floor across from him, Sophie following your lead. “Thanks, honey.”
“Thanks for making the hot chocolate, my loves,” Ben responds, glancing over at the tray that holds two regular Christmas mugs and one with the Frozen characters on it. He picks that one up and pretends to take a sip. “I assume this one is mine?”
“No, Daddy, that’s mine!” Sophie squeals, making both you and Ben laugh as he carefully passes it back to her. 
You all sip your drinks in silence for a few minutes, enjoying the warmth of the sweet beverages and the burning fire. 
“So, did you enjoy your first snow, Soph?” Ben asks. “Was it everything you hoped?”
“It was amazing!” Sophie confirms. “Thank you for playing, Daddy.”
“You’re welcome, angel,” Ben says with a soft smile as Sophie climbs into his lap and he kisses her rosy cheeks. 
It’s not long before she drifts off to sleep, tuckered out from playing in the snow and comforted by her dad’s embrace and the sound of you and Ben quietly talking about your days. 
Once she’s fully passed out, Ben carefully shifts her tiny frame over in his arms to make room for you on his other side and beckons you over. With him laying back against the sofa and you now laying against his chest, both of you watching your daughter sleep peacefully, you’re not sure you’ve ever felt more content. 
“That little girl absolutely adores you,” you comment, nuzzling further into Ben’s warmth.
“She must get that from her mum, then,” Ben jokes, making you roll your eyes for a moment before kissing his jaw, then his cheek.
“Mhm,” you nod, smiling as you reach his lips and kiss him slowly. 
When you pull back, Ben gazes lovingly at you for a moment before his eyes return to Sophie, her little hand curling around the material of his hoodie in her sleep.
“Babe?” Ben murmurs, and you nod again. “How would you feel about trying for another one?”
It takes everything in you not to betray yourself with a grin as you think about the tiny Christmas onesie and pregnancy test you boxed up and placed under the tree yesterday while Ben was picking Sophie up from daycare. 
It’s less than a week until Christmas - you can make it that long. 
“Let’s talk about it after the holidays?” you say for now, pressing another kiss to Ben’s lips. 
He nods with a smile, though you can see his mind wandering with thoughts of another little one to play in the snow and curl up by the fire and watching the same movies over and over with. 
It’s been the greatest joy of your life raising Sophie side by side with him, and you absolutely can’t wait to do it all again. 
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haddonfieldwhore · 7 months
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remember me? - dominik mysterio
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dominik mysterio x gn! reader
word count: 1.8k
warnings: language, angst, blurs kayfabe and real life, readers gender isn’t specified but they face rhea in a tag match, rhea x reader a tiny bit
you were sitting on couch in your dressing room backstage, scrolling through your phone, when a notification popped up. you clicked on it, and a memory from you photos app with the caption “3 years ago today” appeared on your screen.
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it was a photo your best friend… if you could still call him that, had taken on your phone. you smiled sadly, remembering how inseparable the two of you were before he joined the judgement day. you and dominik had been attached at the hip since you met when you were 5 years old, and you had always thought that nothing would ever come between you. if you hadn’t been there to see it with your own two eyes, you would have never believed it if someone told you dominik would turn on his father and join rhea, damian, and finn. you had tried to talk to him, to get him to change his mind, but it had only ended with rhea attacking you in the ring, leading to a tag match between the teams of you and rey, against dom and rhea. with help from the rest of the judgment day, your opponents had got the upper hand and scored the victory.
seeing dominik change from the sweet, gentle guy you had grown up with into what he was now hurt you more than you could bare, and you requested to be moved to smackdown instead of raw to get away from him and the judgment day. your wish had been granted, and it had been months since you talked to dominik. rey had moved to smackdown as well, and you were glad he was away from them; seeing what dom was becoming was hard for you, you couldn’t imagine what it was like for rey. he was convinced that rhea was manipulating his son, and while you wanted to believe that, you worried that dominik had changed on his own. even if you could get through to him - you weren’t sure if you would recognize the man he had become.
you heard a knock at the door, and looked at the time, 8:39pm, which meant smackdown was almost over. you assumed it was zelina, who you traveled with most of the time, and if you had known who was really on the other side of the door, you wouldn’t have opened it.
dominik stood with his hands in his pockets, and you strongly considered slamming the door in his face, but you could still see the same sparkle in his eyes that had always been there as he smiled at you, and couldn’t bring yourself to do it.
“hey,” he said softly. you raised an eyebrow, as if to ask what he wanted. “can i come in?” you didn’t say anything, your head and your heart fighting over how to answer. “please parajito,” he pleaded. ‘little bird’ had always been his nickname for you, and your heart ached hearing it again.
“you don’t get to call me that,” you finally spoke, standing your ground.
“i just want to talk to you,” he said, raising his hands to plead his innocence.
“i have nothing to say to you,” you said sadly.
“you don’t have to say anything. just listen, okay?” he gave his best puppy dog eyes, and you let him speak.
“okay, let’s hear it.”
“i want you to join the judgment day,” he said, and you laughed.
“goodbye, dominik,” you said, shaking your head as you went to shut the door, but he stopped it with his hand.
“wait! please, you said you would listen,” he insisted, and you sighed.
“fine,” you crossed your arms over your chest. “you have 2 minutes.”
“think about it, y/n. you and me working together, the judgment day by our side; we would be unstoppable. i talked with the others and they agree that you would be a great addition to the group. things could go back to how they were with us. i want my best friend back.”
“dominik - this isn’t you!” you said, pointing to the judgment day logo on his hoodie. “they’re manipulating you. because if they’re not i really don’t know who you are anymore.”
“you know me better than anyone,” he argued, and you shook your head.
“what you did to your dad, your mom, aalyah-“
“don’t pretend like they didn’t have it coming, you saw first hand. my dad was never there for me growing up.”
“dominik, i’m not going to argue with you about your family-“
“judgment day is my family now,” he interjected. “and i want you by my side out there. come back to raw, and be apart of my new familia,” he begged, taking your hands softly in his. you tried to pull away, but didn’t fight very hard as he held onto you. he dropped your one hand to pull something out of his pocket, and you sighed as he tied a purple bandana around your wrist. “think about it,” he repeated, and you pulled your hands from his grip.
“your two minutes is up,” you said, closing the door in his face.
“i’ll see you monday!” he called through the door, and you sighed, sitting down on the couch and pulling your knees up under you chin. you scrolled through more memories your phone had brought up. you looked down at your wrist, and closed your eyes, leaning your head back on the back of the couch.
you weren’t really even considering it; right? you thought, running your hands over your face.
you wanted more than anything to have your best friend back, but you weren’t sure if he was still in there somewhere, or if he had been corrupted to the point where he could no longer be saved.
•••
monday had rolled around, and you paced around your hotel room, still thinking about what dominik had said. was joining the judgment day what it would take to get dominik back? was it worth it to turn your back on all of your friends on smackdown; to side with the enemy?
you looked at the time, your eyes landing on the purple bandana on the dresser, before you read 6:41 pm on the clock. raw was starting soon, and you had to make your decision now. you grabbed you stuff and headed to you car to drive to the arena, hoping that whatever you decided, you were making the right choice.
•••
all four members of the judgement day were standing in the ring, arguing with kevin, sami, and cody when your music hit, and you made your way down to the ring. you got in the ring, cody holding the rope for you to step over, and you stood face to face with dominik. he had a worried look in his eyes as you currently stood on the side of the enemy, and rhea stepped between the two of you, nose to nose with you.
“y/n…” kevin started, but rhea shot him a glare.
“shut up,” rhea snapped, before locking eyes with you again. “well, do you have an answer for us?” she asked, and you took a step back, giving you enough room to remove your ring jacket. everyone in the ring prepared for a fight. only dom noticed the purple bandana around your wrist, and cody was shocked as you turned around and knocked him to the ground; you had chosen your side.
as rhea went after the fallen cody, damian and finn locked up with sami and kevin. dominiks arms wrapped around your waist from behind, as he pulled you into his arms and into the corner of the ring away from the fight. dominik turned you to face him, his hands on your shoulders.
“you’re with us?” he asked, and you nodded.
“i’m with you,” you agreed, and he threw his arms around you, hugging you tight to his chest. you laughed, a sinking feeling in your stomach as you realized exactly how much you had missed him. the rest of judgment day had chased their opponents out of the ring, leaving just the five of you standing.
“i missed you, parajito,” he spoke into your ear, and you held onto him even tighter. you finally separated and rhea looked at you, an unreadable expression on her face. she threw an arm around dom’s shoulders, and then to your surprise, the other around yours.
“welcome to the judgement day,” she grinned, and you smiled. you had to admit, you were shocked at how welcome you felt in the group. dominik had said they all wanted you to join, but you were worried that his relationship, whatever it was, with rhea, might complicate things. but rhea could tell how much dominik meant to you, and admittedly, she had taken a liking to you almost immediately. “you’re mine now,” rhea smirked, holding you and dom close as he laughed.
“relax, mami, no one’s gonna steal them from you,” he smiled. damian and finn joined the group hug, and you realized that dom was telling the truth, they really were a family.
the judgment day music stopped as adam pearce came down the ramp, microphone in hand.
“excuse me, this is all very touching. y/n as you are a member of the smackdown roster, you cannot join a faction belonging to the raw roster without yourself moving to monday nights - is that what you want.” rhea pulled you behind her, already protective of the new member of her group.
“that’s what i want,” you confirmed, and dom wrapped his arms around your waist and rested his chin on your shoulder.
“i will see what i can do,” adam sighed, and rhea hugged you again, and you had to admit you felt safe in her arms. you had made the decision to join the judgment day to get your best friend back, but perhaps in doing so you had gained three more. dom smiled at you, and you felt him lace his fingers with yours as rhea clung to your other side.
“what do you think, dom? can we share them?” she asked, and he laughed.
“that’s up to them,” he said, kissing the side of your head innocently. you had never imagined that after only a few minutes, you would feel such a connection to the group.
damian and finn held the ropes so you, dom, and rhea could exit the ring, and the five of you headed backstage together.
“i think mami likes you,” dom whispered in your ear, as rhea still hadn’t let go of you.
“i could get used to it,” you smiled, and she returned it.
“what do you say boys? should we show them how we celebrate in the judgment day?”
“you know it,” damian smirked, fist bumping dominik.
“welcome to the family, y/n,” finn said.
“thank you guys,” you smiled, looking at each of them before finally your eyes landed on dom.
“maybe now dom with shut up about missing you all the time,” damian teased.
“c’mon man,” he blushed, and you laughed, using your still intertwined hands to pull him into your side, and you all laughed.
“i missed you too.”
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269 notes · View notes
blackypanther9 · 2 months
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Alastor teaches M/n how to hunt – Father!Human!Alastor x Son!Reader
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WARNING!: Killing Deer, bathing someone (Don’t you dare make this sexual, eww.), mentions of weapons (rifle to hunt and hunting knife), Angst AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!
A/N: If any of you make this one bathing scene sexual so HELP ME THE RADIO DEMON !! *Gets out the rolled up newspaper ready to smack your perverted heads* (Pic belongs to rightful owner)
TAGLIST: @l0liamk @dilucragnvindr-my-beloved @moiravim @meg-giry1 @wen01203
Words: 8 792
If Alastor hated one thing dearly, it was being compared to his Father. That’s why he NEVER acted like that vile man did. His Father forced him to learn how to hunt already when he was an 8 year old kid, for example.
M/n, his Son, was 11 years of age now, but he hated thinking about teaching him how to hunt. He knew it is important. Who knows if M/n will have to use that knowledge one day... But he deemed him way too young still. He loved animals.
Why was Alastor even thinking about this ? Because M/n asked him, for 3 months by now, if he could join him and learn how to hunt.
Alastor had to go today, but he didn’t want to drag M/n along. M/n knew that and with that locked all the doors to get outside and then hid Alastor’s house keys. Without them he can’t go, besides he wants to climb out a window and then be locked out by his Son.
“Please, Papa !”, M/n begged with big eyes.
“Mon petit (My little one), you are way too young for that.”, the Radio Host denied again.
“Why am I too young for it, Papa ? I wanna learn !”
“Cher, do you even know what hunting means ?”
“Umm...that you go out with a gun and look around ?”, M/n said in confusion.
Alastor chuckled and ruffled his Son’s hair.
“Almost, mon petit. But not correct !”
M/n pouted.
“Then TEACH me ! YOU are MY teacher and my FATHER !”, M/n reminded his Father.
The Radio Host eyed his Son for a long while. He was very unsure, he doesn’t want to be like his own Father was... He forced Alastor to learn and witness everything at a very young age. He was glad when he finally died.
“Are you absolutely sure about this, Cher ?”, he asked M/n gently.
His Son held pure determination in his eyes. Something the older male admired.
“I am very sure, Papa. I wanna learn everything you know.”
Alastor gave him a confused smile.
“Why ?”, he asked the kid.
M/n gave him a big smile.
“Because I wanna be just like YOU, when I grow up ! I wanna be as funny as you, skilled as you, nice as you, I even wanna do the same job as you when I grow up !”
The Radio Host was shocked, but felt very touched that his own Son wanted to be just like him. At the same time it was silly. He chuckled and ruffled M/n’s hair.
“Mon petit, you don’t have to be just like me. I want you, to be yourself. But...I would lie, if I wouldn’t say that I would love to teach you everything I know.”, the older male gave in.
His Son’s eyes sparkled.
“Does that mean you’ll teach me ?!”
Alastor sighed and then nodded, smile still present. M/n jumped up and down in happiness and the adult chuckled at his adorable display. He was nothing like his Father, his Father never cared to make Alastor happy. He never gave him time, as a child, to develop an interest in what he did, while his Mother did.
“Alright. So, hunting is not something that is taken lightly.”, Alastor started.
M/n instantly sat down on his Father’s bed, next to Alastor, listening intently. The Radio Host was almost amused by that display.
“Yes, hunting takes part in taking a hunting rifle outside with you and walking around, but you don’t do that to waste your time away. You are on the search of something.”
“And what is that, Papa ?”, M/n asked in curiosity.
“Food.”, Alastor answered and looked at his Son.
“Food ?”, the boy asked in confusion.
“Why yes. You know...the meat we consume, like chicken and fish...are animals. Living things. Our food.”, Alastor explained.
M/n looked at his Dad.
“I mean...I knew that, but why hunt it ? They die by themselves and then we eat them, right ? We find them and they are already dead.”
Alastor shook his head and laughed gently.
“No, no, no, Son. We hunt these animals, kill them and then we take the meat from them. We don’t wait for them to die, god knows if they had diseases that ended them. Some diseases can pass onto us as soon as we consume them, so we hunt them instead.”
M/n’s eyes were wide.
“What ? But what about the babies ?!”
Alastor smiled softly.
“There is a season for that. When the time arrives where babies are supposed to come, you are not allowed to hunt and kill animals. After the hunting season is back on track, you have to watch out and be careful that you don’t take away the Mother from a newborn. That does every hunter worth their salt.”
He looked at his Father worried.
“And the Fathers ?”
Alastor chuckled awkwardly.
“Well, most animal species only mate once and they usually don’t care about their newborns. As sad as that sounds, usually the males then leave and can even hurt the newborn. And when the newborn is a male and grows up, they might fight for dominance.”
“Oh...”
“Hey, don’t be so sad, Son. One animal leaves and three new ones are already there. Animals don’t die out that fast.”
He looked at his Dad.
“What are we hunting, Papa ?”
“I was going for a Deer. You want to tag along ?”
M/n nodded. He was sad about the animals, but first...they tasted good and second he wanted to learn.
“Okay then.”
Alastor got up and then left the room, when he came back he had a small hunting outfit in his hands and handed them to his Son. He took them.
“Put these on. They were formerly mine, when I was 12, but I don’t fit into them anymore and they might fit you.”
M/n nodded and left his Father’s bedroom, went to his own and dressed up. The clothes fit him perfectly.
As he showed up, his Father smiled brightly.
“Splendid ! They fit you perfectly !”, Alastor said happily and then grabbed his Winchester 1898 rifle hunting gun.
Then M/n saw, that his Father had a hunting knife in his belt too, sheathed.
“Papa ?”
“Yes, mon petit ?”
He pointed at the sheathed knife.
“What do we need the knife for ?”, he asked his Dad.
“That is a hunting knife. You never leave the house without it, in case you need it.”
“Oh. Okay !”
He smiled at his Son, then put on his coat and they both left.
“Rule number one, Son: You have to know where they might be.”
“Do you know where the Deers are ?”
“Always near the same location, yes. Just follow me.”
He did as told and after a while, which was 2 hours of walking, they arrived at a small river and saw a Stag, eating grass all alone, the birds were chirping very loudly, perfect. They can use that to their advantage. Alastor crouched down, behind a bush and M/n followed his example.
The Radio Host continued in a whisper, so the Stag won’t be alarmed.
“Rule number two and three: Don’t make any loud noises and never let the prey spot you. They hear you, they run away. They see you and they also run away. Deer are very jumpy and fast.”, he taught his Son.
M/n nodded at that. Then he watched his Father, very carefully, grab and pull his rifle, from his back, to his chest. He silently opened his gun and put two bullets inside it. He looked at M/n.
“Do you want to shoot it ?”, he asked his Son in a whisper.
M/n nodded gently. Alastor came closer and carefully handed M/n the rifle, positioned his hands where they had to be and then gently guided his hands and the rifle through the bush. He looked over the edge of the bush and saw the Stag still eating.
“There is a little hole on the top of the gun, you look through it with your right eye. You will have more focus and aim on the Stag then. Aim for the head.”, Alastor instructed, still in a whisper.
M/n did as he was instructed, with the help of his Father. Alastor was behind his Son, had his head next to his Son’s left side of the head, and focused his eyes too, to see if the front of the rifle lined up with its target. He smiled when M/n had it.
“Perfect, mon petit. Before you pull the trigger, I need to warn you. The rifle will have a strong recoil. Keep your arms relaxed, then the gun will recoil in your hands and your arms will be pushed up and you might fall back, but you won’t get hurt.”
“What if I stiffen my arms ?”, M/n whispered his question.
“Then you will seriously hurt yourself.”
“Oh...Okay.”
“I will be here and support you.”
“Okay.”
“Let’s shoot it together, mon petit.”
M/n nodded and then they both checked again. Everything was still perfect, Alastor took the safety off, then M/n and Alastor pulled the trigger together.
BANG !
M/n’s arms were in the air with the rifle, his ears ringing, the recoil made him fall into his Father’s chest and they heard a heavy drop.
“Oof !”, M/n let out as he collided with his Dad’s chest.
“I told you, I will catch you.”, Alastor said smugly.
M/n giggled and then looked over the bush. His eyes widened in happiness.
“I got it ! I got it, Papa !”, M/n cheered.
On the floor, was the Stag, dead. They got it good. The Radio Host chuckled and got up.
“That you did, Son. Good job. Now let us take it home, so I can skin it and store the meat, for us, away.”
“Okay ! Can I help ?!”
Alastor looked at his Son, his smile a bit tighter. He knew that M/n was definitely NOT ready for that.
“No. When you are older, I promise. Skinning and storing the meat away from an animal...is not a nice sight. For that, you really are still too young. Trust me, mon petit.”
M/n lost his smile and looked at his Dad in concern.
“Oh...okay... You’ll be okay ?”
“Cher, I skinned a lot of Deer, way before you even arrived !”, Alastor chuckled out.
He ruffled the boy’s hair.
“I’ll be okay, Cher.”, he said gently.
Then Alastor went to the Stag and heaved it up, then put his head under it and stood up, his right hand held its hind legs, his left hand held its front legs and behind his neck was its belly. With that he started going back home and M/n followed.
“Isn’t the Stag heavy ?”, M/n asked in concern.
“It is, but I carried a lot of animals and other things, so I have enough muscle to carry it. Don’t worry, Cher.”
“Okay...”
Alastor gave his Son a bright, proud smile.
“Hey, Son ?”
“Yes, Papa ?”, M/n replied.
“I know, I said it already, but...you did a spectacular job today. Your first time hunting and you got a Deer ! Normally kids that start hunting won’t even catch anything ! You caught a Stag. Deer are very hard to catch, without them running away before you can get them ! Congratulations.”, Alastor praised highly.
His Son smiled and it went brighter when he continued to praise him for a job well done.
“Thank you, Papa. It means a lot, coming from you.”, he replied with a big smile.
Alastor wanted to reply and had a warm smile on his face, as he suddenly felt something wet hit his nose. He froze up at that, his smile frozen. M/n got a wet drop on his forehead and they looked at each other, then up, into the sky.
More drops hit them and Alastor muttered under his breath.
“Oh, applesauce...”
They were still far away from home, they walked for like two hours.
“We should speed it up a bit, mon petit ! It is raining !”, Alastor said and fastened his steps, which M/n did too.
-Time skip-
It was raining heavily and it felt like buckets of water was poured over them, when they finally arrived at home. Alastor quickly unlocked the door and M/n rushed in, he took his soaked coat, shoes and socks off, then he opened the basement door, for his Dad.
Alastor brought the Stag into the Basement and then came back up, taking off his own soaking coat, boots and socks, then they both rushed upstairs and decided to dry off with towels, then put on comfortable clothes.
M/n was the first one to be in the living room and he decided to light up the chimney, so they will warm up faster. He wore extra clothes under his hunting clothes, while Alastor didn’t. He was soaked to the bone and came down, rubbing his arms, to warm up. As he saw the chimney lit, he sat down on the couch, in front of the chimney, and warmed up there.
His Son in the meantime was in the kitchen and turned on the stove, warming up the leftovers from their Lunch that day. It was enough for Dinner and they both hated food going to waste.
So while M/n was busy in the kitchen, warming up their Dinner, Alastor sat near the chimney and warmed up. Tomorrow he had to go to work again too. It was Sunday and the Radio Host hasn’t taken a day off ever since M/n turned eight years of age. It was pretty good for his record, after all, his NEW Boss was even stricter with him. Worst ? It was a woman...
A woman, M/n HATED. She couldn’t take a fucking hint.
After a few more minutes M/n dressed the table in the dining area and looked at his Dad.
“Dinner is ready, Papa.”
“Thank you, mon petit. I will be there shortly.”, the Father replied softly, voice sounding weak.
‘Did he get sick ?’, M/n thought worried.
He went to the table and poured his Father already the bowl, then his own. They had Gumbo. It didn’t take long and Alastor arrived too, sat down in his seat and they both ate Dinner.
What worried M/n the most though, was that his Dad immediately went to bed after. He never does that. He usually stayed up an hour longer after Dinner, played a game with M/n and then sent him off to bed. He was VERY worried. He cleaned the dishes and the empty pot, where the Gumbo was inside, and then went to bed himself.
-The next day-
M/n woke up and looked at his clock. He saw the time and sighed, getting up. His Dad should be in the kitchen already, making Breakfast. He got dressed and freshened up for the day at his Dad’s studio and then went down the stairs. He was confused as he saw the kitchen spotless and no smell of food was there.
‘Where is he ? Is he still sleeping ?’
He went back up the stairs and knocked gently at his Father’s door. No response. He opened the door and looked inside.
“Papa ?”, he gently called out.
In the bed was movement and a weak groan came from it too. M/n entered the room and stood next to his Father’s bed. He took a closer look at him and saw a red nose, cheeks flushed and his eyelids were red. M/n put his hand on Alastor’s forehead and pulled it back again. He was burning up.
He let his Father sleep and went to the phone. He called the Radio Station.
“Yes, Alastor ?”, a female replied.
‘Great...the pompous Bitch of a Boss...’
“Hello, Miss Ducasse. I am calling for my Father, Alastor Hazbin.”
“Oh...M/n Hazbin...what do you have to tell me, that your Father can’t, hmm ?”, she asked rudely.
“My Father is sick. He has a very high fever and I wanted to ask if I can call him in sick today, so we can get a doctor and get a look at how long and how serious his fever is. His forehead is burning up, but I don’t have a temperature yet. I would send you the testament and sick leave as soon as I have it.”, M/n promised.
It was silent at the other line, then she sighed, annoyed.
“Fine. But you better keep your word, otherwise your Father will be in big trouble and I won’t let this happen again.”, she threatened.
‘Sure you Bitch... You just want to get into my Father’s pants. Whore..’, he thought, rolling his eyes in anger and disgust.
“I will. I promise. Thank you and have a lovely day, Miss !”, M/n said happily.
She hung up, aggressively. M/n looked at his phone and scoffed.
“Rude.”
Then he dialed a doctor’s number. It was almost instantly answered.
“Hello, this is Dr. Thomas Hugo. How can I help you ?”, a man answered.
“Mr. Hugo ! Just who I needed, do you remember me, Sir ?”, M/n asked, glad it was his Father’s house doc.
“M/n ! What do you need, child ?”, the man asked surprised.
“I need you to come to my Dad’s house. I think Papa caught a very high fever and I need someone to check how bad it is and what I need to do, how long it might take. My Papa’s Boss wants a sick leave and testament as fast as possible. Can you make it ?”, M/n asked in an urgent and pleading tone.
The other line was silent for a bit, then he heard rustling.
“I am on my way, Kid. I’ll be there in 15 minutes, okay ?”, Hugo informed.
M/n smiled brightly.
“Okay ! Thank you so much !”, M/n said.
“Always, Kiddo. See ya in a bit.”
“Be careful !”
Then they both hung up and M/n went back to his Father’s room. Alastor was still in bed, sleeping, looking very sick. The boy made sure that his Father was wrapped in his blanket, then he opened his window, letting fresh air inside.
He stayed by his Father’s side, until the door knocked. M/n jumped up and rushed down the stairs. He opened the door and smiled brightly as he saw Dr. Thomas Hugo standing there. He hugged him tightly and then let him inside.
“Thank you for coming here on such a short notice. My Dad is still asleep. I opened the window for fresh air and he is covered by his blanket, so he shouldn’t get worse.”, M/n explained as he led the Doctor up the stairs.
“That was very good thinking, Kid. Fresh air clears the room of the bad and used air, chasing the bacteria and viruses away, cleansing the room.”, Dr. Hugo praised.
M/n smiled brightly, then he opened his Dad’s bedroom door and let the Doctor enter it before him. They both went inside and M/n closed the door behind himself. The Doctor was already approaching Alastor’s bed on the right side and took a look at his face.
“Puffy eyelids, red swollen nose and red cheeks...”, the man muttered.
He put a hand on Alastor’s forehead and pulled it away.
“Burning forehead...”
M/n waited for the diagnosis. Dr. Hugo pulled his bag next to himself and opened it, pulling out a thermometer. He turned it on and then gently opened Alastor’s lips, then put it into his mouth. The sick adult groaned, but didn’t do anything else.
After a few minutes, Dr. Hugo pulled it out and took a sharp inhale.
“That is serious. Deadly serious.”
“Why ? How high is it ?”, M/n asked.
“Before I tell you...How did he get sick ?”
“I think it was from yesterday. We took a walk and we were two hours away from home as it started to rain and it turned into a heavy one. I was dressed with two layers, Papa wasn’t. He only wore one layer and he was soaked through.”, M/n explained.
Hugo nodded.
“Okay, makes sense... Your dad has a very high fever. His temperature is 41°C. A normal one would be between 36, 5°C – 37,4°C.”
M/n stared at Thomas in shock.
“How do I get it to come down ? What do I have to expect ?”, M/n asked worried.
“He will be sluggish. He might have a cough, a cold, scratchy throat, a headache and stomach pains. He could also feel sick to his stomach, so he might not eat much. You need to go to a Pharmacy and get him something against his pains, stomach and cough. I will write you some recipes. Give him much water and tea, don’t leave him out of your sight, help him to the bathroom and everywhere else, air the room a lot and put a cold rag on his forehead. I will give him a sick leave for 7 days and then I will come back, to check on him.”
“Okay. Can I get the sick leave twice ? Papa’s Boss sometimes let the sick leaves of Dad’s disappear.”
Thomas nodded and made him two sick leaves, signed them and then made a testament twice too, then he wrote M/n the recipes for the medications. He also wrote a few tea kinds down and what food Alastor should be able to consume while he is sick. Then he gave it all to M/n.
“If you run out of the medication too fast, give me a call and I will get more and come over, okay ?”, Thomas told the boy.
“Okay. Thank you so much, Dr. Hugo.”
The Doctor smiled and ruffled the boy’s hair.
“No problem, Kiddo. I hope you know what to do from here on. Do you need money ?”
“No, Sir. I know where Dad has some, that I can use.”
“Good, alright. Be careful when you go shopping and don’t get in trouble, yeah ?”
“I will, I promise.”, M/n swore as he led Thomas out of the house again.
“Good. Good luck, Kid. Take good care of your Dad.”
“I will. Be careful on your way back and I hope you will have a lovely day.”
The Doctor smiled and then left. M/n closed the front door, then he dashed to his own room and dressed up, to go out. He then rushed to his desk and wrote a note for his Dad.
‘I’m shopping and giving the annoying Boss your sick leave. You have very high fever and are written sick, I’ll get the medication. Stay in bed ! Love you, Papa !’
He took the piece of paper and put it next to his nightstand, then left a sick leave and testament from the Doctor there, in case his Dad needs to look it over. He also put his glasses there, so he can reach them better and doesn’t have to move too much, then he went to his Father’s black dress pants and pulled out his wallet.
He took out a 50 dollar bill and three 20 dollar bills. He hoped that was enough. He took the second testament and sick leave from Dr. Hugo after that, with the medication recipes and notes, the Doc made. He snatched his Dad’s house keys, and then left, locking the front door, then left for the town.
His first stop was his Father’s Radio Station. He entered it and got greeted instantly by his Dad’s coworkers, warmly.
“Hello, M/n ! Where is Alastor ?”, a friendly fellow asked.
His name was Francisco Zuft. He was a good friend of Alastor’s.
“Hello, Mr. Zuft. My Father is sick. He caught a high fever. I am here to bring the Boss his sick leave.”, M/n replied friendly.
“Oh dear... Wish him well from me.”
“I will, Sir.”
With that they parted ways and M/n knocked on Miss Ducasse’s door.
“Come in !”, she called.
M/n opened it, after an eye roll of annoyance. He peaked his head inside.
“Miss Ducasse ?”, he called out gently.
She looked up.
“Ah, M/n. What have you gotten for updates for me ?”, she asked rudely.
‘I want her so dead...’
“My Father has a high fever of 41°C. He was written sick for a week, for now. Then he will be checked up on again. Here is the testament and the sick leave from his house Doctor.”, M/n said and gave her the papers.
She took them and read through them. She sighed and nodded.
“Alright. This is serious, your Father is excused. Thank you for bringing the papers to me. You may leave.”, she said with distaste.
‘Bitch.’
“Thank you. Have a lovely day, Miss.”, he politely said and then left.
As he was about to leave, a lot of Alastor’s coworkers swarmed M/n and asked him to send him their get well wishes and they wanted M/n to come back tomorrow. They had something planned for Alastor. He agreed and then left, wishing them all a lovely day.
He rushed to the Pharmacy. A kind, young Lady looked at him.
“Can I help you, little boy ?”, she asked gently.
“Yes...umm...”, he answered and nervously fumbled in his coat pockets.
He pulled out the notes and recipes. He handed her the recipes for the medications he needed.
“I need these medications for my Dad. He has a very high fever and I am taking care of him. Do you have any of these or maybe something that comes close ?”, M/n asked, politely.
She took them and read through them. She smiled at the boy and nodded.
“We do have these medications, wait here for a bit.”
Then she left and came back after a few minutes. She had small and big versions of the medications.
“Do you want the big ones or the smaller ones ?”, she asked.
“Depends on the price, Miss. Can we look how much ?”, M/n asked gently.
“Of course.”, she replied kindly.
She scanned the small ones and they made 26.78 Dollars in total. Then she scanned the big ones and they made 40 Dollars in total. M/n took his chance.
“I will take the big ones.”, he chose.
“That would be 40 Dollars. Do you want a bag, Kiddo ?”, the woman asked.
He gave her a smile.
“That would be nice. Yes, please.”, he said politely, while he pulled out two 20 Dollar bills.
She nodded and pulled out a bag, putting the medications inside the bag, then she took his money and she gave him the bag.
“Have a good day, Kiddo and take good care of your Dad.”, she told him with a warm smile.
He smiled back.
“Thank you, Miss. I hope you will have a lovely day.”
Then he left the Pharmacy and rushed to the store. He took a shopping cart and rushed through the aisles, taking what he needed for the food, his dad can consume, looking at the price tags and calculating the price in his head. Some stuff was lowered in the price, which was positive ! He saved up money.
He needed vegetables A LOT of them, some seasonings they ran low on them, then he bought chicken meat, some crackers without salt, Rusk, eggs, milk, a lot of water and some other small things his Dad can snack on.
For all of that stuff, he had to pay 30 Dollars, then he bagged it all, shoved the cart back into its place and rushed home with the bought goods.
-Time skip-
M/n was home and unlocked the door, he carried the food inside the house and into the kitchen, then he stored it away and rushed up the stairs, while opening his coat. He entered his Father’s room and saw that he was NOT in his bed, but a lot of tissues were on the floor. He looked around the room and then heard the flush of the toilet in his bathroom.
The door opened five minutes later and his Father walked out, looking like death warmed all over him. He knocked on the door and it caught Alastor’s attention. He looked at him and gave him a weak smile.
“Hey, mon petit. Did you get everything ? Have you had any trouble ?”, he asked with a hoarse voice, quietly.
“Hey, mon papa malade (My sick papa). I did get everything and I had no trouble. I got the medication and took the big packs. I took 110 Dollars from you and gave out about 70 Dollars. They had a lot of prices reduced, so I saved a lot. The medications were 40 Dollars, but the small packs would have costed more in the long run. They were all together almost 27 Dollars.”, M/n explained gently, minding his voice.
Alastor sat down on his bed, coughed and nodded. He held his head, his head was pounding horribly.
“I gave your sick leave and the testament to your Boss. I asked Dr. Hugo to make us two, in case she makes your sick leave disappear again.”
“That’s good, Cher.”, Alastor weakly said, proud of his Son.
“I will make you some soup now, lay down and try to get some more sleep. After you ate something, you can take the medications.”
“Of course, mon petit. Thank you.”
“No problem, Papa. Leave it all to me. I will take care of you.”
With that he left the room and went back into the kitchen. He took out a bottle of water, he had to stop a few times to continue and carry the heavy package, but he was proud he got it so far, then he brought the bottle of water to his Father’s room, with the remains of the money he took and a cold, wet rag.
His Father was laying down again, under the covers. M/n put the bottle on his side table next to his bed, then he brushed his Father’s hair back and put the cold rag on his forehead and put the remaining 40 Dollars onto his desk in his room.
“Thank you, Fils (Son).”, Alastor rasped out, sighing in relief at the coolness on his head.
“No problem, Papa.”
Then M/n left and entered the kitchen. He searched through the cupboards for his Grandmother’s recipe book. He found it and opened it, looking for a chicken soup recipe, after he found it, M/n read it.
Then he pulled out a cutting board, knife, a pot, the ingredients he needed and two bowls. Then he got to cutting the vegetables first and put them in the first bowl, after that he cut the chicken meat and put it into the second bowl.
He put butter into the pot and turned on the stove, heating up the pot.
-Time skip-
 He loved his Grandma, even though he never got the chance to meet her. Her recipe was perfect, it tasted amazing and he didn’t burn down the kitchen ! The soup was done and he filled a bowl, for his Papa and put a spoon inside it. He brought it to his Father’s room and saw him sleeping.
He seemed to be sleeping better than before. He put the bowl of soup down on the nightstand and then left again, getting the medicine and his own bowl of food. He sat down next to his Dad and took the wet rag off of his forehead.
“Papa...wake up...”, M/n called gently.
“Mmmnnn... Five more minutes...”, Alastor sleepily replied.
The boy giggled.
“Papa, the food is getting cold.”, he informed the adult.
The adult sat up carefully at that, eyes very small from sleep. He yawned.
“Already ?”, he asked his Son.
“Yes, I cooked for a while.”
Alastor put on his glasses and then looked at the clock.
“Huh.”, he said in shock as he saw how late it was.
Then he coughed.
“Barely awake and coughing already.”, M/n said in pity.
Alastor weakly waved it off and then grabbed his own bowl. He smelled it and looked at his Son in shock.
“You...You made Mama’s recipe ?”, he asked with a cough interrupting him.
“I did. I looked through the cabinets and cupboards just to find the cook book of Grandma. She wrote it so detailed, that I had no trouble making it. I hope you will like it. Oh, and your coworkers wish you all a get well soon greeting.”, M/n informed.
Alastor smiled and weakly ruffled his Son’s hair.
“Thank you, mon petit. What would I do without you...”
“Probably be in agony right now.”, M/n replied jokingly.
Alastor let out a raspy chuckle, then a cough.
They dug in together and Alastor had to admit, M/n cooked it exactly like how his Mother used to cook it. Not even Alastor could get the head on the nail, but his Son did it. He remade it and it felt like his Mother made it.
He ate two bowls of it, while M/n ate three, he received his medications after and took them. Cough syrup, something against his cold and stomach and then a painkiller for his head. Then he was back to sleeping, with a new cold rag on his forehead.
As Alastor woke up again, he saw that M/n left him a bag with snacks he should be able to consume. He smiled. His Son knew him too well.
It was nighttime and he needed the bathroom. The sick Radio Host winced as he felt his bladder, almost exploding. His Bedroom door opened and in came his Son, checking on him. He turned the lights on, making Alastor groan and shut his eyes tightly.
“Sorry, Papa. I thought you were still sleeping. I wanted to open your window again, for fresh air. Night air is always the best.”
“It...It’s alright, Cher.”, he replied with a cough.
“Do you need anything ?”, the kid asked.
“Bladder...”, the man got out.
M/n nodded, quickly opened the window and then went over to his Dad. He helped him out of the sheets and the bed, guiding him to the Bathroom door. He could feel how weak his Father was, he could barely hold himself on his own legs...
“Yell if you need my help. I will wait outside of the door and then heat up the soup again, for Dinner, then you get your medications again and then it is back to sleep for you.”, M/n told his Father, like he scheduled it.
Alastor smiled and chuckled weakly in amusement. His Son really was strict with him, so he can recover just fine.
“Alright, Son.”, he agreed and then shut the door into the Bathroom.
While he was in the Bathroom, using the toilet, M/n was worried sick.
‘Am I doing this right until now ? Papa would have been the same with me...The few times I was sick he was very strict, but it helped...Am I cornering him too much ? But he didn’t complain yet...Does this mean that I am doing this right ?’
The boy never had to take care of his Dad, like this, before. Alastor had small colds, small coughs and once or twice a small stomach bug, but he usually could always handle himself and just asked M/n for small things. Like a bucket, new pack of tissues, heating up food, a bottle of water or even paper towels. Alastor never was so weak, that he couldn’t handle himself. This was entirely new to M/n and he was scared that he is fucking it all up...
He was snapped out of his thoughts as he heard his Father retching. The boy instantly opened the door and saw his Dad vomiting into the toilet. It hurt his little heart. He left and started to get the medicine, a bottle of water, a glass and some paper towels, in case he wasn’t fast enough and some was on the floor. When he returned, the toilet was flushed and Alastor leaned against the wall of the Bathroom, looking absolutely miserable.
M/n looked at the toilet and saw that some sick was on the floor and stained his Father’s shirt. He seemed very weak, so he decided to help his Father, as uncomfortable as it was going to be for the both of them...Alastor couldn’t stay in his soiled clothes.
He wiped away the stain on the floor and threw it into the trashcan in the room, then he looked at his Father.
“You need a bath. You look like death warmed all over you, Dad. And that is the nicest way to tell you, how miserable you look. Not even your smile is still there.”
“And who will undress me ? I am far too weak, Son.”
“You are speaking to the answer.”
The man’s eyes widened, in shock and slight worry.
“Absolutely not, M/n.”
“I am supposed to take care of you, Dad. You are my responsibility. You helped me with everything too, when I was sick. Now...it’s my turn to help. This is nothing new to us, just the roles are reversed.”, M/n reasoned with his Father.
He looked at his Son, still not convinced.
“Your body is too weak to handle itself properly. Your shirt is covered in sick, you are sweating terribly too, which causes you to smell bad later. Let me help you wash up and all is well. I won’t be scarred. I admit, it is weird and uncomfortable, but I want to help you feel better. We are both guys. It is nothing we haven’t seen.”
Alastor eyed his Son for a while and then he sighed.
“Alright...BUT, as soon as we feel too uncomfortable, I want us to stop.”, he said with a few coughs in between.
M/n nodded softly, then he let water into the Bathtub and some bath foam, for bubbles. After the water was running he turned to his Father, who still sat on the floor, back leaned against the wall. The boy rolled his own sleeves up and then approached his Father.
“First we get your arms out and then we pull it over your head, so the sick won’t get in your face and you don’t have to hold your arms up for long.”
M/n grabbed his Father’s left arm and maneuvered his arm out of the sleeve, then he did the same with the right arm, then M/n grabbed the front of the shirt, careful to not touch the stain of sick, and pulled the shirt over his Father’s head. After the shirt was off, M/n folded it and put it away, so he can wash it later.
“Now, stretch your legs out and lift your hips, we pull it all off in one go.”, M/n instructed.
Alastor did as told and soon enough he had only socks still on. M/n took them off and then helped his Father up. He guided him to the Bathtub and helped him inside, gently. As he sat in the tub, M/n put the ruined clothes away, while Alastor sighed in comfort at the warm water.
“I’ll be right back. I am going to get you towels and a new set of Night wear.”, M/n informed his Father.
“Alright.”, he replied weakly.
The boy left and started to collect everything, while Alastor relaxed in the bathtub, turning off the faucet. As he returned with the towels, new set of Pyjamas and a measuring cup, for the hair wash, he saw his Father relaxed. That made him happy.
He put everything on the cupboard near the sink and then approached the bathtub again. He took a washing cloth and wettened it. Alastor opened his left eye, lazily.
“Hey, Son.”, he weakly got out.
“Hello again, Papa.”, the kid greeted back.
He took his Father’s favorite soap and gently lifted the parent’s left arm, then he put some soap on it and started to spread it with the cloth, washing him. Alastor felt uncomfortable at first, but he slowly started to relax into it. This was his Son, he wouldn’t do anything perverted to him.
M/n washed his Father everywhere. Arms, back, chest, neck and he washed the armpits twice too. The two of them agreed that Alastor will wash his legs and man parts himself. M/n helped his Father sit up and held his legs up, because his body was too weakened to do that all itself for longer than 10 seconds. He was grateful to have his Son right now.
The Radio Host got cold in the water and M/n turned the hot water on, to fill the tub a bit more, warming up the bath. When Alastor said it was good enough, the kid shut the water off again and he washed his Father’s hair. The grown up would lie, if he said, that he hated having his hair washed.
M/n massaged his head, while he washed his hair. It felt nice and relaxing. He almost fell asleep, but before he could even think about nodding off, M/n washed his hair out and then got the toilet seat ready, for Alastor to sit down on.
“Alright, now you gotta get out, Pa.”, M/n said.
Alastor sighed and carefully got up, then used M/n as support. Even though the child was just 11 years old, he was strong and wise. He carefully got out of the tub and M/n wrapped a towel around his waist, never once looking and seeing his Father’s tool (Quite the achievement), then he guided him to the toilet seat and sat his Father down. He grabbed a smaller towel next and wrapped his Father’s hair in it, then got a bigger one and started to dry his back, chest, neck and arms.
“Do you want to dry the rest ?”, he asked his Dad.
“Yes.”
M/n nodded. He decided to turn his face to the wall next to him and shut his eyes.
“If you need standing support, I am here. I won’t look.”
Alastor did need the support as he got up. He used the towel around his waist and started to dry the rest of himself, always holding onto M/n when he felt unsteady. After he was dry, he held the towel in front of his crotch.
“I’m done, Cher.”
“Okay. I will turn back around and give you, your underwear.”, M/n informed.
“Okay.”
M/n did as he told Alastor and turned away again, letting his Father use him as support, so he can put on his underwear. After that M/n told his Father to sit back down and he put his pants on him and helped him into his shirt, then he put new socks on his Father too. He smiled as they were finished.
“All done now. Look at you. You are sparkling clean, in new clothes and you look way better than you did a few minutes ago, Papa ! Now we need to style your hair.”, M/n said happily.
Alastor smiled and chuckled. M/n instantly got to work, having watched his Dad do his hair multiple times.
-The next day- (Damn is this shot long...)
After M/n helped his Father into the Bathroom and back into his bed, in the morning, made sure he ate, took his medications, had some food in his stomach and a new bottle of water, with a glass, tissues and a bucket filled with water, he decided to leave the house and head back to the Radio Station.
As soon as he arrived, he was swarmed with his Dad’s coworkers. They lead him into a small room and he was confused. He saw nothing changed, so why were they there ?
“Guys...what did you plan on doing ?”, M/n asked them.
“Don’t worry ! We are getting everything ! You’ll love it, M/n ! We hope it will be helpful to you and your Father too.”, Tony said happily.
Tony Justa was another coworker that was close with Alastor. They weren’t friends per say, but they got along very well and acted, most of the times, like Brothers. It was surprising that someone, who was white skinned, liked Alastor so much. But here Tony was, a white skinned man and he had no problems with M/n’s Papa. He found the whole racist stuff absolutely stupid. M/n couldn’t agree more with him.
“Okay then. You better have something good planned for your petit frère platonique (platonic little Brother).”, M/n teased Tony.
Tony chuckled and rubbed his neck with a soft look. No one knew, but Tony was two years older than Alastor and while they never officially called each other Brothers, they behaved like Brothers. There was no term for such a bond yet, so M/n called them platonic Brothers.
Soon enough the other coworkers came inside and all of them had small baskets or bags in their hands. Francisco gave Tony his bag and then he left M/n’s side and stood in – between the small group and M/n, who looked confused.
“We all wanted to help you and Alastor back to health, so we decided to make small gift bags with get well cards !”, Tony announced.
At that M/n’s eyes went wide in surprise. He didn’t expect that. The others just nodded with big smiles.
“Why would you all do that, you saps ?”, M/n asked gently.
Another coworker chuckled, Peter Geraldo.
“Because, silly, you and your Father brighten up the days here and always make us laugh or at least smile. Without you two here...it’s just not the same. You two always gave us something when you were here, so now it’s our turn.”, Peter stated.
The others nodded. M/n smiled at them and chuckled.
“You are such thoughtful good friends and coworkers. Thank you.”, M/n said softly.
The group smiled and then started to give M/n the bags. They always told him what was in them and M/n couldn’t be happier. One of the discs Alastor had his eyes set on for a while, teas, juices, get well cards, fruit in a lunch box, vegetables, teas they made at home themselves, fruit pies, small snacks for Alastor to munch on and more.
Peter, Francisco and Tony were the last ones. They had the biggest bags.
Peter gave M/n his bag first.
“In there are two cards. One is for him and one for you, Kiddo. Some sweets you like and some things your Dad likes. There are two kinds of tea inside too and two big boxes of different juices.”, he told the boy.
He smiled at Peter and hugged him tightly.
“Thank you, Pete.”
“No problem, Kid. You need some appreciation and care too.”, he replied and rubbed the kid’s back.
Peter stepped back and Francisco was next. M/n gently took it from him.
“There are some homemade teas inside, two recipes that Alastor would love to have they will also power up his Immune System, some homemade spices, a small Coupon that holds 30 Dollars, a strong homemade juice, some tissues, a few sweets for you, some cut fruits in a lunchbox and a little something for you to keep around, Kiddo.”, he said, winking at him.
M/n was curious, but decided to wait until he was at home. He smiled brightly and hugged Francisco.
“Thank you, France.”, M/n said.
“No problem, Kiddo. Peter was right, you also need some appreciation and care.”
How did M/n just get so lucky, with Alastor and now his friends and colleagues, become his too ? Just how lucky was he ?
They parted from the hug and Tony was last. He had a big, gentle grin on his face and handed M/n the big bag.
“There are two juices for each of you two. Two are for your Dad and his Immune system and two are for you to just enjoy and stay healthy with, they are all four homemade too. Two of your favorite teas, homemade, are also in there, some sweets and snacks for you and Alastor, I baked you some of your favorite pastries yesterday too, I know how much you love them. Then I bagged two packages of your Dad’s favorite Coffee in there and I gave you, for food shopping, two 50 Dollar Coupons. I also went around and got you and Alastor each a small little surprise. I hope you two will like them.”
M/n had small tears in his eyes with a big smile. He hugged Tony tightly, which he returned.
“Thank you so much, Oncle (Uncle) !”, M/n said happily.
Tony froze for a split second and then tightened his hug, a big, warm smile on his face.
“No problem, Neveu (Nephew).”
They parted and M/n looked at the time, his eyes widened a slight bit.
“Applesauce ! I need to get home, before Papa wakes up ! Whenever he wakes up he needs me to help him around !”, M/n said, cursing. (Yes, he cursed by saying Applesauce, just like Papa.)
“Is he that weakened ?”, Tony asked worried.
M/n sighed and nodded.
“He has a very high fever and it is hard to get it down...His body is not coping very well with it and he can barely move around on his own. He is...pretty weak right now.”, he told the three still in the room.
“He gets his Medicine ?”, Francisco asked.
“Yes, he does. I always give him his medications when he ate something. Even if it was a small piece of bread.”, M/n answered.
Tony hummed in thought, trying to think of something that might help his, platonically claimed, little Brother. Then he came up with a few things.
“You will need Peppermint tea, it will help with his throat and the coughs, it gives him better rest and his body will relax a bit more. Peppermint has also antiviral properties, and can help to relieve pain, reduce inflammation, and clear congestion. It has the trait to warm you from the inside out. Chamomile tea is also good. It reduces cold symptoms, boosts the immune system, and reduces inflammation. Also if his eyes hurt a lot or they even start to fester, just drown a piece of paper towel in the tea and put it over his eyes, it works wonders. I also would recommend Hibiscus Tea. It will give him a lot of Vitamin C, which his body will need.”, Tony listed off.
Francisco, Peter and M/n stared at him in awe at his knowledge.
“What ? I had to take care of my parents a few times and my Sister. I researched where I could.”, Tony defended himself with a small pout.
M/n smiled and hugged him again.
“Can you write it down for me ?”, he asked the adult.
“I will do you one better. After work, I will get it and come visit. I will help you with Alastor. How does that sound ?”, Tony offered.
M/n looked at him with big eyes.
“But I was supposed to take care of him. What if he makes you sick too ?”
“You will still take care of him, but with a bit of help, so you don’t have to stress yourself around, Kiddo. And if I get sick, I have my Family to look after me AND I will get a break from work. It is a win for me.”
M/n put his finger on his chin and hummed in thought, then he looked at him again and nodded. Okay, deal !
Tony smiled brightly.
“Then I’ll see you later. Now rush home, before Al realizes you ran off.”
The boy nodded and then ran off as fast as he could, yelling Goodbye. Tony chuckled.
“This kid is just what Al needed. Now he has someone that will take care of him again.”, he said to Peter and Francisco.
“Yeah. It’s nice to see that Alastor has someone else to care for him now. After all, we all aren’t getting younger.”, Peter replied with a chuckle and a warm smile.
Francisco nodded, smiling brightly. Then they got back to work. While M/n was home in record time, before his Father woke up and even realized he was out.
Masterlist HERE !
A/N: Yes, it is finally out and I am out of the WIP for part two ! ^^ YASSSS !!!
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fetishfairytales2 · 3 months
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Besties 4 (Story)
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This was originally written as a continuation of a story by @wittlesissyb4by called Besties. Check out all their fantastic stories on Tumblr and SubscribeStar.
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Besties 4: Mommy’s Going on a Date!
“Ooh, speaking of pegs, I forgot to mention what Connor got me for our one-month anniversary!” Heather excitedly left the room and came back holding a massive 8-inch strap-on! I couldn’t believe this thing; it was flesh-colored with bulging veins and even pubic hair! "Wow, girl, talk about a detailed replica!” I laughed as she held it up. She wobbled it by the harness with a wink: “Get this; it's modeled after Connor's cock!” Heather was beaming with pride as she showed it off to me. "It's my favorite way to mess with Brandon," she boasted. “Imagine being fucked by the same cock that stole your girlfriend, who’s also the one fucking you with it!”
Brandon was literally screwed once Heather had enough of his crap. She was totally in her element, totally ruining his life. And honestly, I was so here for it. The best part of it? When she told me, she made him moan Connor's name while she pounded his sorry ass with that big fake dick. Like, could he be any more pathetic? I almost felt bad for him.
“Aw…” Heather cooed in her mommy voice again at the trembling sissy, “Isn't that right, Brandi? Don't you just love it when mommy helps you practice how to get ready for daddy-sissy time? It's just so precious and fun, isn't it?” She turned to me and stuck out her tongue; She just loves when I make her beg for Daddy's cock to fuck her deeper, trust me!” Tears of humiliation were flowing down the sissy's flushed face. "And watching in the mirror while Mommy stretches his little sissy hole? It’s just her favorite!”
Heather's phone buzzed, and she practically flew out of her seat when she saw that it was Connor. "Oh my God, it's him!" She exclaimed, her voice dripping with excitement like a teenager on her first date. I couldn't help but smile at her excitement, glad to see her so happy, replacing Brandon’s worthless ass. 
"Answer it, girl," I urged her on. Of course, the minute her phone hit her ear, she tried to sound flirty. She was using the ‘sexy voice’ I always tease her about. Ugh, she was so typical. "I can't leave; I have a girlfriend visiting me," she continued, emphasizing the word "girlfriend" with a smirk and a wink. "But I miss you too, she sighed, clearly missing her new boytoy. "But like, I also really miss that dick," she added with a laugh, earning an eye roll from me. But hey, she got rid of the fuckface, so who am I to judge?
Heather was clearly loving her new life with Connor. "Sweetie, you better hope you ride dick better than you flirt over the phone!" I laughed. “But if you’re so desperate for a good time, why don’t you just go over there and throw yourself at him?” She stuck a thumb at Brandi. “What am I going to do with this loser if I go out?”
Brandon was hating every minute of this, and I really wanted to make it worse for him. "Girl, don't even worry about it,” I said with a smile. “You need some good dick, and I happen to know just the person who would be thrilled to take care of your little sissy cucky baby while you're away," I teased Heather, winking at Brandon, who was now looking terrified. Heather couldn't contain her laughter. 
"And who might that be?" Heather asked, raising an eyebrow, clearly interested in wherever I was going with this. "Babysitter Lyndsay!" I giggled. "I could take care of Brandi all night long if you'd like. Maybe even until the morning." Heather turned to Brandon and mockingly asked for his opinion, knowing he had no real say in the matter. "What do you think, Princess? Should Ms. Lyndsey be your babysitter while Mommy goes and has a 'playdate' with Daddy?"
I couldn't help but smirk as I watched Brandon's face turn a bright shade of red. Heather owned him now, though, and there wasn't a thing he could do about it. "Aww, are you not sure, sweetie?" Even with a gag in his mouth, he was clearly very pissed. But Heather just continued to mess with him. "What's wrong, little man? Feeling frustrated that Daddy gets all the attention while you're stuck in Pampers?" 
I had to stifle a laugh; Brandon looked so sad he might cry. She turned to me, her eyes lighting up, and shrugged. "Ms. Lyndsey is very kind to want to babysit, so make sure you behave, Brandi! Maybe Mommy will have a special surprise for breakfast tomorrow!"
"Surprise?" I asked, knowing that whatever it was, it would be fun for us and terrible for Brandon. Heather just winked as she headed toward her bedroom. "Brandi's on a special, uh, 'protein only diet'. You'll see what I mean." 
As she disappeared down the hallway, I was left alone with Brandon. I put on my sweetest baby talk voice. "Aww, whose a cute sissy baby? Is it Brandi? Yes, it is!" I said as I grabbed his chin and brought our faces close together. "Aww, go ahead and cry for Ms. Lyndsey, sissy baby. No matter how much of a bitch you think Heather is, I’m going to fuck with you ten times worse.” The worthless loser looked like he was going to dirty his Pampers right there. He was so scared.
"Oh, honey," I cooed as I pushed his head back and stood up, my perfectly manicured nails tapping against my chin in fake contemplation. "Heather never mentioned my college boyfriend, did she? Brad was quite the catch, not like you at all," I sneered, relishing in the sight of Brandon quivering with fear. 
"Brad knew how to handle a strong woman. I can't say the same for you, sweetheart," I taunted, taking a sip of my 8th glass of wine for the evening, feeling giddy and like a bad bitch. “He was a real man, but he loved being told what to do in bed. I learned all about fun kinks—teasing and denial, chastity, you name it!” 
Fuck, this was getting spicy. Who knew my best friend’s loser boyfriend dressed as a sissy would do it for me? “Oh, Brandi, you sweet sissy girlie,” let me tell you it was hot!” I placed my index finger in front of Brandon’s face. “I had him wrapped around my perfectly manicured finger. I'd tease and please him, but never let him have all the fun. And he would just beg and plead with me to let him cum. But you know, a girl needs to get her fill too, and I wouldn't keep him waiting too long; I'm not that cruel...to real men.”
The wine was clearly helping me loosen up, and the scared look in Brandon’s eyes was definitely giving me a rush. "You," I snapped, grabbing Brandon's hair and pulling him closer to me. His eyes were fixated on my tight, short skirt. Wow, I was turned on just thinking about the night I could spend ruining poor Brandi. "You, though, will never, ever think about touching another woman as long as I'm around! Unlike Brad, I don’t care how much you beg; I am that cruel to worthless sissy losers." I growled, giving his hair a rough tug to make sure he was paying attention.
"And of course, there will be a lot of teasing for me and begging from you, I promise,” I said with a wink. Brandon's wide-eyed stare showed me that he knew he was fucked, and I couldn't help but smile. Sure, Heather had the strap-on, but I had this sissy by his caged cock.
My fun was interrupted by Heather calling to us from the bedroom. "Ms. Lyndsey, would you mind bringing Brandi in here? I want him to see my outfit for Daddy tonight!" I rolled my eyes and smirked at the pathetic little sissy kneeling before me. “Aww, sissy, are you, like, totally stoked to check out Mommy's sexy outfit?" I sneered at Brandon, enjoying his embarrassed blush as he shamefully looked down at the ground. I had to laugh at the pathetic sight of him standing there, afraid to even make eye contact with me. 
“Come on, Brandi, a sissy cuck like you must love thinking about your girlfriend getting fucked by a real man!” He was crying again. What a loser. “You're such a lucky little sissy girl; you even get to watch her get all dressed up for her date," I taunted, playfully poking his chest. He tried to shake back tears and just stared at the ground. "Fine, let's go see Mommy then, little crybaby." I rolled my eyes and firmly spanked his diapered bottom; “stop throwing temper tantrums. No one actually cares about how you feel."
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Glimpse of Us
Summary: Years after the faithful night, reality brings the two back together, with all the years of unresolved pain, feelings and comparisons
Warning: Angst is all the warning I can think off ehehhe, Hard core Angst
Note: ehehehehe the long awaited sequel to She use to be mine is finally here! After what? nearly 2 years. its finally here! I'm so sorry for the long wait and thank you to those who encouraged me to continue on with the next part. I won't dawdle on and let you lot enjoy the concoction i seem to have mustered on. ehehe again sorry for the months delay.
oh and i almost forgot, the italics are best imagined as her singing
P.S. I drafted this post 7 or 8 months after the first part and dear god, how time has passed. Looking back at the story, I'm not really too proud of this one and ended it because I really have no idea how to continue it. I have an idea for a next part (dangerous words coming from me) but I'm not gonna set a date for when I post it because we all know how the last part turned out. Anyways enjoy
😊❤️💛💚💙💜🖤😊 -T
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‘Hey, you’re up in five’`
‘Yah sure, just touching up’ you say as you smacked your lips after applying a bit of lip gloss.
‘You don’t need it’ he replied.
‘Still. I can’t believe I agreed to this’ you scoffed, fiddling with your hair for the hundredth time.
‘You’ll do great’ he smiled ‘Now your hair is fine, you look amazing, and I have to go. Break a leg’ he bid before getting on stage to rouse the crowd. Admittedly, you are nervous. You wouldn’t call yourself a singer, but you do have a good enough voice and can hold a tune. You knew it was a mistake singing in front of Harvey and you were only doing this as a favor. God. You checked the mirror one last time before finding it was good enough.
‘Now for tonight’s performance, A very dear friend of mine has agreed to perform tonight, though with a little bit of persuasion.’ Harvey mumbled the last part, getting a laugh from the crowd and a chuckle from yourself ‘She has a voice made by the gods above, though I don’t remember Thor being much of a singer. She can lure you in better than a siren, but I think that’s the other mythology’ he said cheekily.
‘Now, without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome a dear friend of mine, Y/N Y/L/N!’ he introduced, that being your cue to emerge from the curtain, you stepped on staged and made your way over to the middle where he and the mic was, the spotlight following your movement. You waved and smiled at the crowd, glad there wasn’t much. Grasping the mic, you chuckled as the small crowd continued to clap.
‘Hi everybody’ you began, getting a hello in response from the crowd ‘Wow, thank you for the warm welcome and thank you Harvey for that unrealistic introduction’ you chuckled with the crowd, turning to Harvey who waved you off.
‘Now, taking something off of Harvey’s speech, I am made by no god or am one. Nor am I a siren from the Greek mythology. It did take some persuading to get me to do this and hopefully I don’t regret it.’ You laughed sheepishly.
‘I don’t normally sing on stage or in public really unless it’s karaoke with friends, which by the way is how I got tricked into doing this, so pardon me if I seem a bit nervous’ you smile shyly. Glancing back at Harvey, with a smile on his face, he nodded, pushing you to continue. Pulling out the rest of the confidence you still had stored, you turned back beaming at the crowd.
‘Now to not keep you waiting any longer, Paul if you will’ you gestured to the man on the piano and he nods before gliding his fingers along the keys, playing the start of the song. Letting out a breath, you closed your eyes, feeling the rhythm of the piano before singing the lyrics. Grabbing hold of the mic, you opened your eyes and began.
He'd take the world off my shoulders
If it was ever hard to move
He'd turn the rain to a rainbow
When I was living in the blue
You let your eyes flutter to a close as you gripped the mic firmly. Swaying your body occasionally to melody.
Why then if he is so perfect
Do I still wish that it was you?
Perfect don't mean that it's working
So what can I do? Ooh
Opening your eyes, you scanned the crowd, completely surprised by how the much you can see of the crowd seemed entranced.
When you’re out of sight
You saw you’re your friends in a booth over on the corner, the people entering the establishment.
In my mind
Then the bar where you found him, staring at you. You locked eyes with those beautiful ocean blue orbs that you love loved so much. Stumbling over your words, you nearly forgot about the song but once the piano keys hit the right note, your lips continued in autopilot.
Cause sometimes I look… in his eyes
And that's where I find
A glimpse of us
Eyes leaving contact, you scanned his entirety. The grey streaks at his temples have grown longer since the last time you saw him. The old clean-shaven face he used to don had a goatee. Prominent lines and creases were evident in his features and really the years have aged him well. He wore a suit, complete with a vest, a red handkerchief in the breast pocket and everything. A glass of whiskey at his side and he was still as handsome as the day you left. 
You closed your eyes once more, willing this to just be another trick or hallucination by your imagination. Though it was a horrid idea as memories of the day came back crashing onto you, you let them stay shut as you continued.
And I try to fall for his touch
But I'm thinking of the way it was
There you stood, as beautiful as the day he met you, if not more. In all your beauty, and the signature grin you adorned, you were radiant. Though the spotlight might have something to do with it, you were still a ray of sunshine through the darkest of clouds.
The rest of the world faded out to him and his mind finally faltered. There you were. Standing a few feet away as you introduced yourself. Your hair’s cut short, or at least shorter than the last time he’d seen you. Earrings hid behind your curls and the lightest bit of make-up was applied to your soft features. Though that didn’t hide the blossoming pink tint gracing your cheeks. Your lips glistened with the lip gloss you had on just like you use to. Smile lines drew at the corner of your eyes as you chuckled over your own words, explaining how you ended up in your current situation.
You always smiled, even when you were feeling down, you always smiled. Whether to hide what you were truly feeling or to just be nice to people, you always smiled. He nearly forgot how beautiful that smile was, with only his dreams used to recall that charming grin, since it has been a rarity for him to look you up or even open the box full of pictures during your years together. Even with the picture he kept in his nightstand, he rarely opened the drawer. Funny how this photographic memory of his nearly forgot the most beautiful piece of art he’s ever seen.
He listened to every single word you uttered as he looked and committed every single detail he could of you to memory. Your hair curled into soft waves, parted and pinned on one side. Your frame, fuller since the last time he saw your thin, nearly skeletal figure on that fateful night. You wore a wine-red wrap top that reached down to your wrists, paired with simple jeans and boots, you looked divine. The dip in the neckline of your shirt revealed the top of your cleavage but the gleaming gold necklace is what caught his attention. It was a simple gold bar plate though engraved with a heartbeat on one side. Common and a bit of a cliché now adays but what was special about that was it was an actual heartbeat. His. He gifted it to you when you both got accepted at Metro General. He explained that it was how his heart beat whenever he thought of you. As you tried to find the words to thank him, he made you turn it over to the other side to another engraving. You know I love you so, it said. A line from one of your favorite songs. He remembered how tears brimmed your eyes as you leaped to him, capturing his lip with yours.
What came as a shock to him now was that you were still wearing it. As he continued to look you over, the sound of your chuckle registered in his ears. God, he loves that sound. A sound he hasn’t heard long before you left. Looking back up to your face, he sees the girl he met all those years ago, buried under piles of books in the library on campus. The very same girl that chuckled at his horrible attempt at a flirtatious first introduction. A small smile tugged at his lips both at the memory and the sound. He hasn’t heard that sound in so long, it was a wonder when he heard it last. He just knew it was long before he fucked up and just chose to relish in the sweet sound now.
Now focusing and giving his undivided attention to your voice now, he listened.
‘I don’t normally sing on stage or in public really unless it’s karaoke with friends, which by the way is how I got tricked into doing this, so pardon me if I seem a bit nervous’ you laugh timidly. A chuckle bubbled at his throat as flashes of you singing whilst cooking in the kitchen of your tiny apartment came into view. Wearing nothing but his shirt as you flipped pancakes, singing from Coldplay to Queen at the top of your lungs or humming to Ed Sheeran whilst you worked and studied case filles.
He knew you enough to know that you were nervous, you didn’t have to say it. After all these years he still knew you better than the back of his scarred hands, heck better than he knows himself.
He saw you look to the side and his eyes followed, landing on the host from earlier. With a smile on his face, he nodded, giving you the reassurance you needed to continue with your performance. And it did, he saw how you pulled the last of your confidence before turning back to the crowd.
A pang of jealousy shot through him as he watched. I mean what did he expect, for you to be alone after all these years. A stupidly selfish part of him even hoped that you’d be waiting for him. To get his act together and you’d be back together. It was incredibly stupid; he knew that but that didn’t stop the creeping grip of jealousy from grasping his heart. As much as he knew how selfish the thought is, that didn’t stop the pain and hurt he felt seeing you look for reassurance in another man. Even after all these years.
The smile he had drawn up earlier had faded to a look of melancholy. It was good you had someone, he thought. Someone to be there for whenever you needed them the most, unlike him.
He watched as you turned and gestured to the pianist who nodded and started to fiddle with the keys. He watched as you took a breath, closed your eyes and began to sway to the smooth melody of the music. A small grin was itching at your lips. You were always more comfortable whenever listening to music and this was evident, unbeknownst to you.
Then you started to sing. You opened your eyes, took a firm grip at the mic and the lyrics just came dripping smoothly from your lips. That melodic voice of yours that he loves so much reminded him of the early mornings in the kitchen, the concerts in the shower and the lullabies to the kids under your care. Little did you know but the sound of your sweet voice always comforted him during the hardest times. He didn’t ask you to sing directly but he always listened whenever you hummed a simple tune or sang a song from some Disney movie to calm the kids in peds ward.
He took in every word that came from your lips. From what he’s heard so far from the first verse, it was about how the man lightened and took away the burden and sorrows the singer felt. The way you sang the song, it was beautiful. It was as if you were truly meaning the words that left your lips and he couldn’t help but feel the envy creeping back up at him, though at the same time, he’s conflicted with relief. He didn’t know if you’ve had someone during the past couple of years but as hurt as he is at the prospect of you with somebody else, it sort of gave him a sense of comfort thinking that you were getting taken care off. It eased some of the weight he felt and often times he thought maybe it was good that you separated. All he'd done with you the last few months of your relationship was hurt and neglect you and if you ever found someone that remedied that, maybe it was for the best that you left.
He watched your eyes flutter to a close again. The way your body moved to the melody of the music completely hypnotized him that his drink was deemed long forgotten.
Why then if he is so perfect, Do I still wish that it was you?
At those words, for some reason that gave him hope. He didn’t know if it was just the song but really, just the way you sang it made it seem all too genuine. He still loves you; he knew that very well. He also knows that he had a better chance in coming up with a new strategy in defeating Thanos (despite the many but one failed attempts he saw using the time stone), than ever getting back in a relationship with you.
You are the most kind, caring and understanding person he knew but you were also stubborn. He might have the chance in getting to apologize and to ask for forgiveness, but a relationship was a billion to one cosmic fluke. Though that didn’t stop him from wondering if you meant those words.
You opened your eyes and continued with the song. He noticed you looking at the growing mass of people watching. From the corner booths to the door, he knew from that growing look at your face that you were surprised to say the least at how many were captivated by your performance.
Then you met his gaze. Those soft blues meeting that beautiful shade of your own eyes. God, how much he loved those shining y/e/c orbs could never be put into words. How they twinkle in the light. The comfort and understanding they held and how they always seem to know he felt.
When he woke up from the crash, the first thing he longed to find were your eyes. The warmth, comfort and security they held, he ached to see those beautiful orbs because for the briefest moments he forgot everything but you. You were his main thought. He forgot about the fight, the neglectful months before, the pale, emaciated figure of yours that haunts his dreams, everything. Only the kind, gorgeous face of the woman he fell for all those years ago stayed in his mind because whenever he thought of comfort, the only thing that formed in his head was, no… is you.
He was hurt, in pain, his body ached, he could barely see let alone open his eyes. He needed comfort, he needed you. But when was life ever nice.
Instead, he was met with the fluorescent lights of the hospital room and the horrific sight of the mangled hands that once led a successful career in medicine. There was no warming gaze to be greeted with, only the sad sympathetic ones he now knows to be from the wrong woman and a cold, sterile room.
Cause sometimes I look… in his eyes
You stumbled over your words as you continued to look at each other. You continued singing but your eyes were locked together. Neither of you could look away. Your mouth moved on autopilot as your eyes lost the spark of a flame you had earlier, just like that night all those years ago, replaced by a reflection of the pain and grief he caused. The very same one that haunts his dreams.
A glimpse of us
You finished, your voice fading as the lyrics came to an end. As soon as the piano tuned out, you smiled and gave a little bow at the crowd who erupted in applause before leaving the stage in a hurry. Welled up tears spilled down warm cheeks as emotions and memories continued to riot your mind. After all these years he still managed to make you cry. Why can’t you move on?
You were quick on getting your belongings from the small prep area behind the stage however your plans of a speedy getaway were quickly ousted by the very same gentleman that perpetrated this whole ordeal.
‘You were amazing! The emotion you put in the performance…’ He continued to ramble on, looking past the curtain and to the roaring crowd cheering on for an encore, completely oblivious of his friend’s distraught state. ‘I mean the teary eyes, come on. Doctoring ever not work for you, acting could be something to con…’ he paused after finally getting a glimpse of you, swiftly wiping away tear streaks that ran down your cheeks but the growing redness in your eyes were dead give aways. ‘Shit’ finally piecing things together, he cursed, his attention fully set on you now. ‘It was real. Fuck, are you okay?’ he asked, finding it difficult figuring out what to do, yet a hint of urgency too as he still had to go back on stage.
‘Yeah, yeah, I’m fine.’ You swallowed, lying through your teeth. ‘I just… have to go’ you mumbled quickly, giving him a grin in hopes to resemble something as composed as the friend he knew. Though he knew you enough to know you were not ‘fine’, with great reluctance he let you go, rushing to the stage shortly after exchanging goodbyes and promising to check with him later.
As your friend went back on stage, you quickly took a survey of your appearance on a nearby mirror, making sure you didn’t look as dreadful as you felt. The bit of makeup you had on survived, however your eyes weren’t as forgiving being red. Nevertheless, you sped out to leave.
Considering your options, your only available exits were the front or back door and wanting to avoid individual who has left you in this state (just by being present), you turned to the corridor that lead to the back door but as unfortunate as you were, the exit was blocked by men hauling in delivery shipments and by the looks of things they weren’t going to be done any time soon.
You were antsy enough as it was and waiting by the second for them just added to your agitation. You really needed to leave now.  A lump was lodging itself on your throat and the air around you seemed to be thinning. You need to leave NOW.
Swallowing all the anxieties you had, you had no choice but to rush out the front. You stayed on the side, avoiding the patrons and the one in particular perched up at the bar but unlucky you (your luck really seemed to have vanished really), the man saw your abrupt departure, unbeknownst to you.
You made it out to the street and the open air was a fresh welcome, letting you finally breath, whereas the establishment you had left felt suffocating.
You thought it was done. That the lump in your throat would finally dissolve as you walked down the street, thinking that you had successfully avoided the now famed sorcerer of New York. The hero, Doctor Strange…
but when was life ever good to you.
‘y/n…’ he breathed out, catching the sight of you sprinting toward the doors he entered only moments before. It pulled him out of his reverie, wondering if he should talk to you, what he’d talk to you about, an apology perhaps, contemplation of your years together, however the sight of you pulled him out like it always did, especially in the beginning. He sometimes had the tendency to be too deep in thought, he’d ignore everything and everyone in his surroundings, but he always caught you. Your scent, your voice, let alone your image, it always drew him from his stupor. 
Now the sight of you cemented his thoughts.
Downing the last of his drink, he pulled a bill from his wallet and slammed it down the counter without so much as a look onto how much it was before he scurried out, chasing after you. (Like he should have done all those years ago)
He called out your name once he reached the sidewalk, turning left and right in search for you. The street wasn’t crowded much so it was easy to spot the figure stood still a few yards away to his right. With the last few rays of the dying sun and dim streetlight, he made out the curled head of hair the same shade as yours the figure had, and he just knew it was you.
‘Y/N!’ he nearly shouted, causing a few heads to turn in his direction but not yours. You kept your back to him as he sprinted your way. He knew you heard him. You would have kept on walking had you not.
It only took a second to reach you and when he did, he hesitated, not knowing what to do. He wanted to reach for you and plead for forgiveness. On his knees if he had to. Instead, he opted for another call for your name, hoping you’d finally face him.
And you did, after dropping your hands to your side, he heard a small sniff before you turned to him with your gorgeous smile and said (in a somewhat forced cheer in your voice)
‘Stephen. Hi’
‘Hi’ he replied densely. You idiot, he thought at how stupid his response was.
A silence fell over you both as Stephen canvassed your entirety now at a closer distance. He took in every graceful line, freckle and strand of hair he saw to memory. Every little detail he took in was as important as every breath he took. How bloodshot your eyes were didn’t go unnoticed though. Puffy around the eyelids from crying, red possibly from -he guessed- how hard you were rubbing them just before he reached you.  
Surprising thing is, it still broke his heart seeing the distress you so clearly were trying to hide. The thought of tears running down your cheeks, was illegal. They had no business in gracing your face yet, he can’t help but realize that he just keeps being the reason you were left in that state. Where were all these sympathies back then? He asked himself, the very night flashing through his mind.
‘Stephen’ you said again, taking him out of head again. He missed that though. His name coming off your lips. It brought him back to all the mornings with you in bed, tangled in sheets as the morning glory woke you up and you woke him up with that honey sweet voice with the say of his name. Stephen
‘Sorry, um…’ he coughed, trying to piece a sentence, words, anything really that didn’t end in three syllables.
‘You were wonderful’ he finally managed, okay that’s five ‘Back there at the bar…. you were amazing’ like always, he wanted to add but stopped himself, pointing back to where he just left.
‘Thank you’ you muttered, nodding your head before leaving it down to look at your shoes. The way you responded lacked any sort of confidence, as if you didn’t believe his words or yourself. Truthfully, you were never really the most confident, even back then but always did step up when the situation needed. Either that’s the reason or you didn’t believe him, which considering his case, why should you.
Your hands were fidgeting, he noticed. Running and marking the bones of one hand with your fingers tips before your nails would start to pick on skin. This was something new to him. A new nervous habit of yours he hadn’t known before, so it was most likely picked up after your separation.
The person in front of him wasn’t the same one he knew all those years ago yet, still so similar and the same. He remembers everything about you, so if anything of the woman he knew back then was still in there, he knew by how you were acting that you were uncomfortable, agitated.
‘Really, you were amazing’ he affirmed, really wanting you to believe him, or at least to believe how wonderful you really are. ‘Truly, but are you okay?’
He’d done it. Ask that stupid question and that’s what broke the dam, causing the river to run past it with no mercy.
He heard a laugh at first, your hand raising towards your face. The sound bordered on maniacal, nothing like the one he loved but familiar enough to know he has heard it before. Slowly, your head rose, your hand half covering your mouth, half wiping away the rivers that flowed down your cheeks. The sight finally triggered the memory he was looking for. It was all too similar to that night, it felt like déjà vu.
‘um’ you started, finally managing to say after that little fit ‘I could lie but what’s the point? No. I’m not. I’m not okay because you’re here. Fuck, I actually thought that I could get away from this but no, evidently not.’ You tried to reason, looking him straight in the eyes ‘Christ Stephen, I was okay. I was okay when I was singing, I was okay ten minutes ago but then you just came out of no where and now I’m not okay. I’m never okay whenever it comes to you. Not anymore.’ You spit like venom, unrelenting in your streak to get out all your pain because of him. ‘I thought I could be civil but… I-I’m tired. I’m sorry, I’m gonna go. Enjoy your night’ you hurried, saying your goodbyes and turning your back to him to walk away. You would have gone had he not called you back in such a pleading tone.
‘please’ he begs and for some reason and it compels you to listen. You halt your steps, you don’t turn around, but you do wipe away your tears and he takes that as his chance to apologize for everything. 
‘I’m sorry.’  He starts, his own eyes teary ‘I’m sorry for everything. You didn’t deserve what I did to you and it…’ he swallows that lump in his throat, trying to get the rest of his words out ‘it haunts me every day. You’re the kindest person I know, and I took you for granted. I was an arrogant piece of shit, too self-absorbed to even notice that the woman I love was working herself to death.’ You start to turn around ’You were the purest thing I knew and you didn’t deserve the monster I was. And I am so sorry for who I was then. I’ve changed or I’m trying to change, to be better than- than that monster that hurt you and I could only hope for your forgiveness because, you were always someone I never wanted to lose, and I did. By a stupid mistake and horrible decisions.’ His tears start to run, and you finally face him ‘I never wanted to let you go but I was hurting you more than I was loving you and I understand if I don’t get your forgiveness but, I am sorry. I am so sorry for hurting you. For taking you for granted. For not treating you how you deserved to be treated. For everything. You didn’t deserve what I did to you and hearing myself admit this… really just proves I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I need you to know that I am sorry. I’m really sorry for what I did and that… that you deserve.’
You stare at him with tears running down both your eyes and he sees the same urge to wipe them away, in you. The hesitant twitch of your arm as if by instinct, to move and act on the need to clear away his tears and comfort him. At least that’s what he interprets the move of your arm because that’s exactly what you would have done, that’s exactly your character and he wants to do the same. To dry away your tears and take you in his arms in respite.
But you act against those thoughts, only balling your fist as some form of control. You stare into him, as if gauging to find the lie in his words yet there is none and he sees something in your eyes that he can’t explain before they dart away. He watches as you scan your surroundings, looking at the people likely to be watching you both but he didn’t care for them. He only cared about you.
When your eyes turned back to him, you closed them immediately, face scrunching as you desperately tried to hold back to tears but to him, it was as if you were so pained by the mere sight of him. He’d be lying if he said that it didn’t chip away a piece of his heart. 
Your head bowed for a bit as you tried to compose yourself but the words that left your lips once you rose again, only broke more of his heart.
‘You’re forgiven’ you were quick to say before turning back and walking away from him. He watched with wet cheeks, as you sped away from him, and he kept his gaze on you until you disappeared around the corner and then you were gone.
For what seemed like forever, he kept his eyes on that street corner, hoping for something that won’t happen. He knew that whatever he wanted wasn’t going to happen, but a man could hope, right? Though hopes are as easy to diminish as they are to ignite. Grief and disappointment, they tend to last.
The sun had set and streetlights and buildings are all that lit the side walk where Stephen stood. A man well known to the people and thus, there were those who were bound to watch the spectacle put on by the hero. Small crowds had formed over time as they watched the powerful sorcerer confess to the dreadful things he’s done to some doctor from before his fame, asking for forgiveness to all the terrible things he’s done.
To new passersby, they’d wonder why a hero of the city stood so stiff, looking at oblivion. They’d wonder for a minute without context before walking away with a shrug, figuring much more important things to think of.
Eventually, the crowd thinned to a trickle, til the lone man was all that remained the lone street, wondering what he had done to deserve you.
A/U: I've read this way too much to do a final proof read so sorry for all the grammatical mistakes and spellings and all that. Thanks for the read though
I'm hoping that the people who asked to be tagged don't mind me tagging them this late in the game and I hope you liked it. Hopefully it was worth the wait @strangesweetheart @evelynrosestuff @vesta-ro @doodle-cat16 @nabiilahadid @evansmusk @circe143 @dracoflaco
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