#god but this whole week has been fucking weird as hell dude idk how to explain any of how i've been feeling

[byanyan]

got a brand new weighted blanket today so i'm taking it for a test drive rn to soothe my anxiety as i finally crack my laptop open for the first time since sunday

[jujutsu-headcanons]

Gojo Satoru general headcanons

Let's get one thing clear: this man is absolutely chaotic. He is always full of energy. His energy levels never reach below 50%. He is loud and proud, always running, and never takes a minute to relax.

Do not give him Monster. Shoko did that once and it took her forever to get him off the ceiling. Also, avoid caffeine. Shoko replaces his normal coffee with decaf and he still hasn't noticed the difference. Keep it that way.

He was the class clown when he was younger. He wasn't exactly a trouble maker, but he may as well be. I cannot word that sentence and I am sorry. Next.

All of his teachers assumed he never listened in class, so they always called in him when they thought he wasn't paying attention. It still shocked them every time he rattled off the correct answer.

Not only did he answer the question correctly, but he could also explain his reasoning behind the answer, and if it was multiple choice, explain why the other answers were wrong. 

This tall man child would march up to the board and absolutely fill it to the brim with work, turn around, drop the chalk-like a mic drop and walk back to his desk with the smuggest look on his face.

That doesn't mean he did the work tho

Idk how schools in japan work but we all know schools in America only care about the amount of work you do and not what you actually know so we'll use that for the sake of the headcanon: he had straight D's bc he never turned in his work

Despite not doing the work snd goofing off, teachers actually really liked him

A lot of people liked him and he was super popular, but he still felt alone

Fake friends, you know how that works, he didn't meet any real friends until he became a shaman

Clean freak. This dude actually makes his bed. He scrubs his bathroom twice a week. His desk can get cluttered but he straightens up once a week. He's not exactly a germaphobe because

He cannot respect your personal space and that's actually canon but let me take it a step further 

He's a slapper. Especially when he laughs. It doesn't hurt, it's playful dw. He hugs you from behind especially when he's cold. He picks you up and carries you around. He will grab your wrist, arm, or hand and lead you around even if you're following him. He lays his legs across you or lays across your lap. Puts his head on your shoulder. Platonic cuddling between friends is mandatory. He's just so hands-on it's ridiculous.

Unless you explicitly tell him you're uncomfortable he won't stop

Don't worry, if you aren't in that type of relationship, your no-no square is safe. Except, if you seem chill, he will slap your ass regardless of friendship status. His ass is also slappable. You can't tell me Geto and Gojo didn't run around slapping each other asses, okay

He was weird and scrawny as a child. He didn't start beefing out until he started training to be a shaman and he's still kinda smaller than most beefy boys

He can pick you up and throw you around easily. He carried around a 170 pound Yuji like a sack of potatoes and can easily carry around three times that weight

It's amazing he's so tiny because you remember 2014 Shane Dawson making all of those wack ass desserts that was just s pile of chaos wrapped in chocolate?

He can eat every last bite of one of those monstrosities without getting a stomach ache, gaining weight, or dying basically

He knows bc Yuji dared him to do it

He has really cold hands and feet

He sounds old. Let me elaborate. He's constantly cracking his joints. They also creak when he moves. He complains about body pains like he's 80 y/o

He also shares wisdom with the kids as if he's actually 80 y/o

It's irrelevant advice that doesn't make sense but is also useful. Megumi can't count the number of times he's asked Gojo for feedback on his technique but had been told to remember to chew 40 times or never go to bed angry

Starts off sentences with "now son" and "when I was your age"

He uses his blindfold as a headband when he wants his hair out of his face. He also uses headbands as... Headbands... When he wants to wear sunglasses but get his hair out of his face

He owns so many pairs of sunglasses but he always wears the same pair

He's only bought a handful of them himself, most of them are gifts

No one knows what to get him for Christmas or his birthday bc he has everything, so they resort to sunglasses

His favorite pair is a pair that Shoko and Geto bought him as a gag. He thought they were dead serious, though, so he wore them around for a month

They were heart-shaped, rose-tinted glasses

Can you believe this man doesn't use any gel or anything to keep his hair spiky with the blindfold on? It just naturally defies gravity when the blindfold is on

Tell this man he's pretty because he already knows. He's narcissistic but not the cringy kind

Photogenic as hell. Takes great pictures from any angle. 

He gives everyone a different story as to why he covers his eyes. Sometimes he says it's because his eyes are too pretty and are a distraction. Sometimes he says it's because the sunglasses/bandages/blindfold look cooler than his eyes. Sometimes he says it's to protect the six eyes from seeing things he doesn't want to see. The world may never know

He's tried covering his whole face before, but he thinks he's too pretty for that. He at least wants one of his many amazing features to be shown at all times.

So about his driver's license;

He knows how to drive. He can be a good driver. When he wants to be. He just doesn't have a driver's license.

Now he TELLS people he just never got around to getting one, however, there's a rumor he lost it due to too many parking tickets

It's amazing the only tickets he's ever gotten have been from that and once he got caught without a seatbelt; he would have gotten out of that one if he hadn't been flirting with the police officer so bad

This doesn't stop Gojo from driving places though

He steals Ijichi's car a LOT and Ijichi DOESN'T KNOW HOW like??? The windows are never broken and it doesn't look hotwired-

Gojo has a key

You're not even supposed to be able to duplicate car keys but Gojo did 

Also; none of the first-year trio knows he doesn't have a driver's license, though that much should be painfully obvious

He whips around corners, speeds up at yellow lights, goes "watch this" and does a donut, it's just a mess

The poor students have to sit in the backseat too. Just imagine Megumi with all three seatbelts around him like that one meme.

He thrives off of Nobara and Yuji screaming from the backseat, and he can see Megumi being smooshed because he thought the middle seat was the safest through the rearview mirror

Which he doesn't even need because of the six eyes

Despite being such a reckless driver, he knows when danger will happen, so he's never once gotten in a wreck

He blasts the radio, which makes up for the driving.

Has a habit of getting in a car and ending up in the McDonalds drive-thru

Steals other people's fries and keeps the fullest one for himself.

He was rebellious as a kid and teenager, but hey, at least his juvie record is sealed 

He's been detained and in the back of a cop car many times, but the reason was never really bad enough for him to be arrested. Mostly he's just being mouthy. And the time he got caught spray painting on the side of a building. And that one time he and Getou hopped the fence to get into the local pool. And that other time-

It got worse after Getou wasn't around to get him out of trouble. Suddenly, breaking the rules wasn't fun anymore and he mellowed out. 

Tried alcohol and cigarettes before he was legal. Decided neither was his thing, however, he did start drinking occasionally when he was legal.

He's a fucking chaotic drunk. Oh my god he's absolutely feral

Most bars in the vicinity know him by name and they sigh whenever he walks in

Shoko is his emergency contact. She hates it

Shoko has to drag drunk Gojo home at least twice a month and is not happy about it

Once she left him in an alley. He made it home okay so she guesses it's fine

Once he got so drunk he spilled beer on his sock. The thought the fastest way to dry them was by sticking them in the microwave. Forgot about it until someone asked, "Who the fuck is cooking socks???"

I feel it important he was in the break room of the local grocery store and no one knows how he got there

As he was escorted out he stole a grocery cart and rode away in it while singing Don't Threaten Me (With A Good Time) by Panic! At The Disco

He has no alcohol tolerance at all what so ever

He will literally just stare at you and giggle

It's funny he's really flirty but also doesn't seal the deal. Literally, every woman in that bar is willing to get in his bed but he declines every offer. No one knows why

Its because he respects women

He helps his students break the rules as long as they're within reason. Once night Yuji was really hungry and after having a temper tantrum he couldn't order Uber eats bc the school is supposed to be secret Gojo helped sneak him out to get food. Who needs curfew anyway.

The shirts in his closet range from like twenty bucks to the iconic rich bitch shirt the kids ruined in that one chapter we all know the one 

He still wears that by the way, he calls it "art" 

When he was younger, Megumi drew a picture of Gojo being eaten by his shadow dogs. Gojo found it and now it's framed in his room.

He keeps up with current trends and memes like no one's business. This is how he bonds with his kids.

Don't call him old, but also, he'll tell you to respect your elders it's a mess

He has a lot of games on his phone. You can usually find him holding his phone sideways playing some RPG game he probably spent too much money on 

He did hop on the Pokemon Go hype train but after becoming overpowered he got bored

This happens to a lot of games. He pays way too much money, gets to be the strongest in the server, and gets bored

He likes games where you can kill other people's troops and likes to watch as they lose all their power

I canon him as being borderline sadistic

This is why he's Sakata Gintoki reincarnated

White hair, sweet tooth, black leather clothes, dad vibes, never takes anything seriously bc when he does he's scary as fuck, the works.

He is Sakata Gintoki

He liked Gintama growing up. He watched a lot of iconic shows as they aired. He considers himself an og

He's hella bilingual

Because he's the strongest he goes overseas for missions a lot. Because of this he speaks a lot of languages and knows a lot about international cuisine 

He takes pictures of himself eating disgusting foods like snails. He never likes them but he loves the idea of Nobara gagging back in japan

Has paperwork sitting untouched on his desk from three months ago that he will not touch for at least another three months

Does the crossword puzzles in the newspaper every week

Uses humor as a coping mechanism and it honestly just became a personality

Constantly popping his joints. I'm sorry if you find this gross I too find it gross.

Probably brought home every stray animal he ever met ever until he was at least like 22 y/o

Tags: @wasabito @kittaliapenn

[blossom-hwa]

fashion major!kevin

ANYWAY THERE WAS LIKE ONE PERSON WHO CALLED FOR A FASHION MAJOR KEVIN SPINOFF OF THE COLLEGE MODEL JUYEON AU I JUST POSTED (linked below) anyway! hope you enjoy, please reblog if you did, and check out my other dumb overly long blurbs in the stream of idiocy tag on my blog <3

pairing: kevin x gender neutral!reader

wc: 2.5k

genre: fluff, university!au

triggers: cursing

college model!juyeon

TBZ Scenarios Masterlist | TBZ Drabbles Masterlist

kevin moon is known on campus for two things: 1. his bright personality literally everyone loves him and if you don’t you’re jealous of him like sorry not sorry i don’t make the rules you know i’m right and 2. his.... unorthodox fashion sense. like eric thought his snake patterned shit was weird as hell?? but there are weirder things in kevin’s closet i swear to you. anyway this unorthodox style is what got him accepted into the fashion program at the university and even though there are a few assholes who stick their noses up at kevin’s work the vast majority of people are cool w his outfits even if they personally wouldn’t wear them and kevin is v well-liked in his major and on campus in general bc he knows everyone and is nice and polite and really a v cool person to be around when he’s not being a fucking idiot

and on campus there are fashion shows a few times every semester to show off the fashion majors’ work, and let’s just say that this university if p well know for its fashion major so some famous people sometimes come along to these events so EVERY TIME a fashion show rolls around the fashion majors get nervous as FUCK and there’s a lot of speculation on who will get noticed and whatever and everyone is secretive about what they’re working on and just. everyone goes fucking haywire and kevin is always v happy when the stress winds down after a show

(no one knows it but kevin has gotten offers from several companies to work with them after he graduates. he hasn’t told anyone except a few friends like juyeon/jacob and his family)

anyway you are also a fashion major who secretly really admires kevin’s stuff?? like you just think he’s so daring and creative and all of his work is absolutely amazing even if it’s a little weird and honestly you don’t even feel overshadowed by his talent and hard work you just feel in awe that you can be in his presence at all. you’re p sure kevin has no idea who you are bc even though you have a lot of the same classes you’re always too shy to sit or work near him bc even though he seems so nice and approachable he’s also just.... god he’s so good

BUT THEN. one of your professors announces that for the next fashion show they’ll be modeling projects that he’s assigning right now. which is weird asf bc usually you’ll all take your best clothing and like fix it or tweak it for the next show, like sometimes people will make something completely from scratch but that’s nerve-wracking and not many people do it unless they’re in a real pinch but it gets even WEIRDER bc this is not a regularly scheduled fashion event?? it’s like a smaller event apparently that they’ve organized just for this project AND THE WEIRDNESS TAKES THE CAKE when your professor says that YOU ARE GOING TO BE THE MODELS. YOU ALL ARE GOING TO PICK SOMEONE IN THE CLASS TO MAKE CLOTHES FOR AND THEY WILL MODEL YOUR OUTFIT

and this SENDS EVERYONE FREAKING THE FUCK OUT??? bc oh god you can’t rely on the models you’ve been using all semester now??? and you have to make flattering clothes for someone you might not even know v well and it’s just. holy fuck holy fuck holy FUCK

meanwhile you already know who you want to create for (/ahem kevin moon/) but you’re also chicken so like??? you’re just sitting in your seat looking over at him but not saying anything until your friend chanhee just pushes you out of your seat in kevin’s direction and is like GO ASK HIM BEFORE YOU LOSE THIS CHANCE and you’re like JESUS FUCKING CHRIST CHANHEE but kevin’s noticed your movement and he’s looking over with a smile on his face and you’re like jfc i can’t do this but chanhee shoves you again and so you kinda smile (you really hope it looks like a smile) and your voice is LITERALLY shaking when you go over and ask if it would be ok to use him as a model for this assignment and he’s like.... oh my god yes

because what YOU don’t know is that kevin has been ogling your designs all year?? like he enjoys his own style and is comfortable in it but he loves your work as in LOVES IT. he thinks your designs are absolutely flawless and original and you combine styles so effortlessly that he just wants to look into your brain when you come up with ideas bc what the fuck?? you may have different styles but kevin knows how to admire art AND YOUR DESIGNS ARE ART. 

so you’re reeling a day later bc now you have kevin moon’s number and he has yours and he’s now texting you on when you think you’ll have the first preliminary designs ready and when you can meet up so you can get each other’s measurements and all that and when you eventually meet up your hands are shaking so much that you can barely take his measurements and kevin is screeching in his mind as well bc oh my god you’re going to model his clothes YOU’RE GOING TO MODEL HIS CLOTHES

most people are again being secretive about their designs and even though someone in their class is modeling for them this time so there’s a bit less secrecy they’re still working alone so you get a shock when kevin asks if you want to coordinate your outfits. like work on designs together and maybe make something that matches a little though ofc retaining your own styles and you just shriek when you get the text and poor childhood best friend younghoon spills his coffee (you have been friends since basically birth and there are no romantic feelings whatsoever ok it’s strictly platonic like you watched younghoon vomit after eating too much bread when you were like 10 and he watched you get tangled up in a soccer net when you were 13 there are no romantic feelings stemming from any of that)

needless to say you reply yes yes ye sYES and kevin is grinning so wide on the other end that juyeon wonders if he’s gone slightly insane (which he has but we’re not gonna dwell on that) and both of you show up to the work rooms nervous as all hell (i’m not a fashion major i have no fashion sense i still think t-shirts/leggings are the way to go so idk how any of this works do not sue me) but kevin has a natural ability to defuse any tension in the room so within minutes you’re comfortable and laughing with him and wondering why you were so scared to approach him before and THEN YOU’RE REMINDED WHY when he shows you his design for you because... oh god.... it’s unbelievable. like it has a distinctly kevin feel to it but he’s clearly been paying attention to what you wear and what you design because it’s something you would like to wear and something you even think you could look good in. holy shit

and you just blurt out like kevin what the fuck this is so good did you like stalk my designs or some shit?? and you mean it as a joke ofc but kevin just goes beet red and mumbles something about how he really likes your work and how it’s so sharply elegant but also insanely creative and you’re just. open-mouthed like. dude i’m in love with your work too oh my god i’m gonna cry my fashion idol just said he likes my designs i’m gonna screaM

kevin stops you from screaming though even though he also feels like he’s gonna scream and this is the start of a very productive partnership between the two of you like most of the fashion majors are friendly despite the competition but you and kevin are on a whole other level?? and you start hanging out more and more often even when you’ve finished designing and are actually sewing (you ask him if this part can be secret bc you want to add a few things as a surprise - he ofc says yes and winks and tells you he has things he wants to add too which just makes you want to scream out of excitement)

and it’s a week before fashion show day and you and kevin are finished with putting together the designs and you’re excited as all hell and kevin is literally about to burst from his own skin and you insist that he goes first and when he pulls the outfit from the bag you’re just. in absolute awe. the colors match the design you made, it looks like it’ll fit, and even though it screams kevin moon it also has a distinct vibe from your own fashion style and you just yell KEVIN MOON YOU GENIUS as you snatch it from him and go change

(you don’t know obviously but kevin is blushing like a tomato while waiting for you to finish changing)

it fits almost perfectly, kevin marks a few places to fix and is debating whether or not to compliment you bc??? that sounds like he’s complimenting his own work and that’s egocentric as hell but then you say something like does it look fine and he just blurts out more than fine. you look great

AND YOU’RE SO FLUSTERED THAT YOU ALL BUT THROW YOUR OWN BAG AT KEVIN and are like GO CHANGE 

so he takes out the clothes and goes silent and you’re like.... oh my god does he hate it i mean we worked on the designs together and he said he liked it then but what if he changed his mind but then he looks at you and his eyes are sparkling and he’s like y/n this is perfect. literally perfect and he rushes to go get changed and when he comes out your eyes are bugging out of your head bc holy hell you pictured kevin in these clothes obviously since they were made for him but he looks so much better than you ever imagined

and then you blurt out something like holy shit you look beautiful

and kevin blushes again

anyway you both take your measurements and run out and then the day of the fashion show rolls around and both of you are freaking out backstage but the instant you two go on it’s like you both are literal gods bc you feel so confident in each other’s clothing and the crowd can feel it THEY CAN FUCKING FEEL IT and they go nuts when you two walk out!!! and even though it isn’t like a huge major fashion show, it’s just for this one project that your professors cooked up, you and kevin are both beaming like the sun when it’s over despite the fact that it wasn’t an important event bc holy shit you two had fun and everyone’s complimenting your clothing and it’s great it’s just great

finally all the chaos is over and the clothes have been put away and the makeup removed and you and kevin are now standing outside the venue in a kind of stunned silence that all of it’s over. it’s all over. and then you suddenly thrust out the clothes you made that kevin wore and tell him to keep it. it’s a present. and kevin takes it but he also forces you to take the outfit he made for you. and then there’s silence again

but if there’s anything you’ve gained over the past few weeks it’s a bit of courage. courage that let you talk to kevin, courage that let you design clothes for him, courage that let you become friends (and maybe something more) with him. you’ve also learned that kevin is a massive dork and a lovely human being and you’d really love to at least stay in contact so in that the moment you smile and say ‘if i asked you on a date, would you wear that outfit?’

poor kevin looks like he’s about to have a fucking aneurysm and you start to lose confidence but then he’s nodding like there’s no tomorrow like yes ye sYE S OH MY GOD YE S and omg you now have a boyfriend whom you like very very much and kevin has a partner whom he likes very very much

you two may not be a pda couple but you ARE that couple that matches every outfit they wear, you make jewelry and accessories for each other and also make each other clothes every so often. everyone is jealous of your combined fashion sense bc even though the outfits might look outrageous, you two both manage to pull them off and look fabulous at it, but also they can’t even be that jealous bc you two are the sweetest couple and are absolutely lovely 

both of you do wear the outfits you made for that show on your first date which is to like a musical or smth bc theatre kid kevin is something you can pry out of my cold dead hands and everyone’s staring but you two are in your own little world and it’s amazing

kevin admits at one point that he was afraid to ask you out bc he thought younghoon was your boyfriend and you just snort and tell him everything stupid younghoon’s done and by the end younghoon is done with you, kevin is about to vomit he’s laughing so hard, and you are smirking like no tomorrow

for the end of year fashion show you and kevin fix up and accessorize the outfits you two made for the show that brought you two together and there is absolutely no surprise that several different fashion companies scout both of you (and a couple modeling agencies too since you and kevin decided to model your own clothing again - younghoon whines that you’ve replaced him but you shut him up with chocolate bread)

kevin’s a sucker for romance (you CANNOT tell me this isn't true) so your first kiss is on the roof of the fashion building at sunset when kevin does the cheesy thing where he says you look more beautiful the view and you almost slap him but you’re laughing so hard and kevin’s cackling and somehow it turns into a kiss

you are a dork and kevin is even more of a dork and it just works out beautifully bc you’re so absolutely in love that it makes people fake vomit from the sides (looking at chanhee right here) but it’s also really sweet in that you two trust each other completely and would do absolutely anything for the other except murder. kevin made that v clear but really only bc blood would stain his clothing and he doesn’t need that. you agree wholeheartedly (younghoon/juyeon are looking from the sides like what the fuck is this couple do they need help and you two are like just go away and let us be the weird couple we are ok). the conversation ends in a v soft v sweet kiss and just. ik i said it with juyeon but kevin moon is also best bf ever ok you cannot convince me otherwise. 

and that’s how it goes :)

If you enjoyed, please don’t forget to reblog and leave a comment to tell me what you thought! Thank you for reading and have a lovely day <3

(1 reblog = 1 prayer for this weird-ass couple)

[peach-pops]

Hi I just saw the Ukai request thing and I was wondering if I could get some head cannons of anyone on the team, falling hard for ukais daughter or niece

This was so fun to write! I never actually imply this in the request but the reader is adopted cause it’s more inclusive that way! I chose Daichi and Tanaka cause they seem like they would have Ukai react way differently!

Daichi & Tanaka Going Out With Ukai’s Daughter HC

➣Daichi

Okay so Daichi, being the captain and all, if there’s one thing he is really good at, it is respecting authority and understanding the chain of command

He’s worked from being a mere first-year peasant to being the daddy captain we all know and love

That’s why when he starts to catch feelings for Ukai’s daughter, he does his best to never step over the line because he doesn’t want to disrespect his family in any way 

It all started when you would show up to practice since Ukai didn’t want you alone at home but he gave everyone the speech to keep their eyes off of his kid

He made it a point to point out that you were his only child, his only daughter and that he would crack skulls without hesitation if any of the boys made you uncomfortable 

And yes, He looked at Tanaka and Noya the whole time because I swear they’ll simp for anything with two legs and a heartbeat 

Daichi doesn’t catch feelings for you right away though. He acknowledges that you’re pretty but it isn’t until you two slowly started to get to know each other more and more when Daichi realizes how hard he is falling for you

He’s sometimes a bit scared to make a move during volleyball practice since your dad is always like two feet away but you two share a class so you can bet your ass that he’s always sitting next to you and making up any excuse to talk to you

The two of you aren’t even dating but he is already so whipped for you 

Exhibit A

One day before practice, you complained that you had broken your headphones so without even asking you, he rushed to his house to get his pair and came back all sweaty and red, handing them over to you 

Exhibit B

Your favorite drink was stuck in the vending machine and you couldn’t shake it hard enough to make it drop but Daichi went over and bought four drinks so that way it could knock yours over 

Like you’re telling me that isn’t the cutest shit ever? Are my standards just low? ANYWAYS 

You eventually catch feelings for him cause duh look at him he’s perfect but you know that if it were to get more serious, Daichi would have to talk to your dad 

You knew you couldn’t go behind your dad’s back so telling him was the best and only option 

The whole time during practice, Daichi was nervous as hell. He really liked you but he also really respected his coach so he wasn’t even sure exactly how to go about it 

But when you gave his hand a light squeeze, it gave him a big boost of confidence cause screw it, you were worth it

So Daichi sucks it up and the two of you go up to Coach Ukai and he is such a confident and respectful dude he doesn’t even stutter

“ Coach Ukai, I want you to be the first to know that I have feelings for your daughter and she feels the same way about me. I know you’re protective of her but I would never do anything to hurt her, I can promise you that. If it’s okay with you, I’m planning to take her on a date this weekend if you would let me.”

“ Nope.” Ukai said simply as you whined and gave your dad the biggest puppy dog eyes

“  DAD!” You scolded as Ukai rolled his eyes,” Come on, wouldn’t you rather me date  the captain of a team that you can always keep an eye on than I don’t know, some asshole from a different team?”

“ Why does he have to be in volleyball in the first place? Better yet, why do you even need to date a boy? Are you trying to kill me?” Your dad asked as he looked between the two of you 

Ukai did realize deep down that Daichi was arguably the best option you had-He rather you be with Daichi than anyone else around your age group.

A part of Ukai knew that while he loved to see Daichi squirm, he really was a good guy and he just liked giving him a hard time 

“ Fine, have her home by ten.”

“ What about ten-thirty?” You asked as Daichi squeezed your hand and shook his head

“ No it’s okay, ten works just fine,” Daichi smiled back as Ukai couldn’t help but smirk because yep, you picked a good one 

Fast forward to your date and Daichi is outside your house dressed SO NICELY boy has a hot ass button up and everything 

And duh he has flowers for you he’s so cute I’m simping yall 

Obviously, Ukai opens the door and just shakes his head when he sees Daichi all nervous

“ No touching, I mean it kid. There has to be at least three feet between the two of you at all times and remember, if you ever hurt her I will personally bring a bat over to your house and-” 

“ Oh my god please stop, we’ll see you later!” You slip past your dad and grab Daichi’s arm to pull him down the driveway

“  I SAID NO TOUCHING!” 

➣Tanaka

Okay so you know how I said that Coach Ukai wouldn’t be too opposed with you going out with Daichi? Yeahhhh Tanaka is definitely one of the guys he much rather you not go out with at all

I honestly think Ukai sees so much of his younger self in Tanaka and that freaks him out

ANYWAY Lets go to the beginning tho

Tanaka first knows that he is crushing hard on you when he said the stupidest joke in class and of course, you were the only one to laugh cause lets be real, your sense of humor is pretty shit thanks to the internet 

And tanaka is like “ mhm yes I’ll marry you now” cause bruh no one laughs at my mans jokes he is SLEPT ON 

You two start hanging out and pretty quickly, you both are crushing extra hard on each other. It’s only been maybe like a week or two and you two are so uwu with each other it’s insane

One day before practice, you give him a quick kiss outside of the gym but Tanaka is a certified Clingy Boy™ so he pulls you back in for another one that’s much longer 

“ WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING!” 

You both whip your heads around to find Coach Ukai with literal smoke coming out of his ears as he is glaring so hard at Tanaka 

Tanaka’s headass is like “oh im probably getting yelled at for PDA or maybe I lost track of time and I’m late to practice” but oh boy is he wrong

Idk if you guys collectively share one braincell or whatever but it just clicks now for you that “ oh shit, we are so fucked” 

“ Dad, I can explain-”

Tanaka doesn’t even hear the rest of the conversation like his brain shuts down when he hears you say the word Dad 

And he’s thinking in his head that maybe you just call coaches dad for some weird reason but no, Ukai is actually your dad

There’s so much yelling that the rest of the Karasuno members are outside of the gym doors listening in on the conversation because they’re nosey as hell 

Noya is definitely conflicted because heck yes, his boy is dating a female but he also wants to laugh because of course, Tanaka is having bad luck 

Suga thinks it is HILARIOUS 

But anyway

After a whole bunch of yelling, Ukai just says screw it and starts practice and you promise that you’ll talk to him at home but he makes you stay in the gym so he can take you straight home after

BRUH during the whole practice Tanaka does soooooo bad like hes nervous and he feels so guilty

Obviously, if he knew about your dad he would’ve planned it out much better and even ask for his blessing but it was too late to be worrying about what he could’ve done 

“  Don’t be hard on him please. I swear, it didn’t even click that you were his coach and I didn’t want to go behind your back like that,” You said as your dad sat down next to you on the bench as the boys did drills,” but you overreacted. You know he’s sensitive and he’s going to keep beating himself up about it.” 

“ How do you think I feel seeing my daughter kiss a boy? Why can’t you wait until you’re thirty to have a boyfriend? ” Ukai knew you were at the age where he couldn’t keep you away from boys but he was just so protective 

You were his only kid but because you were his daughter, it only complicated things

I already know Ukai raised such a big daddy’s girl (not in a weird way yall) and while he knows he raised you to be super strong, he just wants to protect you from heartache

“ I really like him and he makes me happy and I promise, we won’t even interact with each other if we are around you if it makes you uncomfortable.”

That wasn’t the most comforting thought to Ukai but he knew he was wrapped around your finger and that he would eventually cave in

It took some time for him to get used to the two of you being together. You two never went on any dates at first because Tanaka wanted to ease your dad into the idea of you two being together

But it wasn’t until Ukai saw how protective Tanaka was whenever you would come along to tournaments that Ukai started to feel better at the idea 

Like Tanaka would go FERAL if a guy even looked at you the wrong way and Ukai was secretly like “ yeah you tell em!” 

It was actually comforting to Ukai that you were dating someone who would literally lay their life on the line for you at any given moment because as your dad, he would do the same

So after a few weeks, it was actually Ukai who went up to Tanaka to talk about the two of you going on dates

“ You have my blessing but just know, if you even look at my daughter the wrong way, I will kill you, no questions asked.” 

Tanaka was actually relieved because to him, that was such an easy request. He couldn’t even imagine hurting you or ever making you upset so he was already thinking of date ideas once Ukai finished his sentence

“ Should I start calling you dad now?”

“ Don’t push it.”  

[atalante241]

Tommy’s character is an emotionally not present asshole that doesn’t acknowledge other ppl and I acknowledge that but that doesn’t stop him from being my favorite character in that godawful role play and defending him I don’t give a fuck

He’s a feral fuck who doesn’t acknowledge other ppls feeling and shit but shut up

Make him go to therapy to figure out his own shit 1st and then expect him to figure out how to be present for other ppl and their angst

You don’t expect ppl with mass amounts of trauma to be present for other ppl with mass amounts of trauma, and when one of them does it you don’t just suddenly expect everybody to do that. No. Let them all go to therapy and actually tell each other what’s bothering them along time when it feels right

Not everybody who’s faced trauma is gonna be like a certain way, ppl react fucking differently. And in Tommy’s case his already existing assholiness is amplified as a coping mechanism and just pure angst, that still doesn’t make it okay. But nobody’s fucking said that to him, nobody has actually calmly said that he’s being a huge ass

And sure, he’s a dick to Jack. BUT JACK HASN’T FUCKING TOLD HIM HOW HE FEELS AND NOBODY FUCKING KNOWS THE FACT THAT HE FUCKING DIED AND CRAWLED OUT OF HELL YOU FUCKS, and sure, Jack “told” him last stream. But guess what, he fucking didn’t. He mentioned it off handedly and didn’t press on it, and Tommy didn’t fucking actually listen to him bc

1) he was still weirded out and amazed that he was out, so he totally wasn’t paying attention

2) as I kinda stated before, c!Tommy doesn’t do emotional stuff that well (he has literally not talked to anyone about fucking exile yet)

As for Technoblade, THE BOTH OF THEM HAVE THE SOCIAL CAPABILITY OF A FUCKING CUCUMBER. NO, THATS A FUCKING INSULT TO CUCUMBERS, THEY’RE LESS SOCIALLY INEPT THAN CUCUMBERS! Technoblade literally laughed when he was told that Tommy died, by a dude that was clearly upset about it, that man doesn’t know how to react.

BOTH Tommy and Techno/Techno and Tommy have fucking wronged each other, that shit Tommy pulled at the community house and the 16th and Techno at the fucking portal confrontation and releasing the withers on the 16th. None were okay, Techno literally offered to give Tommy to the dude he’d been hiding from in his house for weeks, and do you people understand how much of an overreaction Techno pulled with the first withers, he literally just fucking yelled at the about the government being the start of their problems and didn’t calm down and hold a-, I don’t fucking know, a meeting about the issues with government. And Tommy straight up used Techno when he was present in Pogtopia (and all of that wasn’t his fucking fault only, he wasn’t alone in that) and then betrayed him and his trust when he joined Tubbo at the community house.

Now, I can’t excuse the portal confrontation with anything else other then maybe it was bait to mock Dream or something, and I can’t excuse the war times with anything else other than ppl didn’t listen. But I can fucking excuse the community house debacle. In canon, Tommy literally met Technoblade through fighting to get L’Manberg back (at least in his view), he’s literally known him for only a few months, and most of that time they haven’t interacted at all (Or maybe they’ve known each other through Phil & Will but idk). C!Tubbo and Tommy have been friends for who knows how long, they fought in fucking everything together, they’re bff’s. And have been for a long time (probably), of course Tommy would join his friend when he realizes what’s happening around him. He fucking himself said that he didn’t like the person he was becoming. He, didn’t like, the person he was becoming. And that, my friends, is a good reason to leave the situation that’s making you become like that.

As for Techno on the 16th, it’s understandable why he was mad and betrayed. From his point of view he made his goals incredibly clear to everyone, and from his understanding he succeeded in that. But guess what, he didn’t. He didn’t make it clear enough that he stood on the stance of “fuck the government, all of our problems come from government” instead of “I’ll help you guys reclaim this country that we’ve been trying to do this whole time”. (Oh god so much could’ve been solved if it wasn’t for social anxiety.)

Tommy’s current plan to kill Techno purely stems form him thinking the dudes gonna break Dream out of prison, and nobody wants that to happen. Just like, ugh!

TL;DR

Nobody can communicate well on their feelings, Tommy’s character has always been an asshole but that’s just who he is, like when Sapnap kills everybody’s pets Tommy’s an ass. But not in an evil way, but if somebody feels like that; they should fucking talk about how he’s making them feel. Instead of, idk, trying to kill him. Technoblade and Tommy’s friendship wasn’t very deep, the reason Tommy’s betrayal fucking hurt Techno so much is because he literally had like 1 friend left back then and currently he has 3. (Niki, Phil and Ranboo)

[allyouzombies]

good omens

AHHHH!!!! I've been creeping back to that pit of emotions recently. Beautiful timing, really!

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

Not to be too typical, but I have a soft spot the size of the universe for Crowley. It's definitely 95% that asking the wrong questions re: religion and faith is how I ended up *here* [vague gestures at general religious identity]. I project heavily! And I am also a tryhard and always attempting to show lots of devil-may-care swagger, but I CARE SO MUCH ABOUT EVERYTHING!!! Also? I have a thing for seeing detached/aloof/distant characters (whether they're truly like that or just putting on a show like dear Anthony J. here) put through the wringer, made to show vulnerability, forced to face emotional honesty, etc. and while we as the audience know all along that he's a very sensitive, caring soul, it's heartwrenchingly delightful to see it dragged out into the light. Beautiful and excruciating and cathartic all in one!!

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

Newt Pulsifer is so fucking pathetic and I adore him. My dude just stumbles into Sergeant Shadwell's Witchfinder Army™️ and rolls with it because like, he lost his big boy tech job and this hollering weird man sure is paying dear Newton a whole lot of attention. I think they both really blossom, weirdly, from each other's bizarro company. Newt has something to do and Shadwell has a new audience who seems to revere him just a tad? Whoa?!!?! God I just adore him I really do

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

I think Anathema Device is really quite popular and beloved and all, but I also think she always needs more worship and examination. I've read some fanfictions where her angst about no longer being a ~professional descendant~ sends her into a tailspin as she tried to be her own person, and it's wonderful!! There's so much digging to be done into her mentality.

Special shoutout to the other main angels Sandalphon, Michael, and Uriel - I adore their costumes, hair and makeup, and how their actors play their parts - just outrageously stunning visually and deeply deeply fascinating imo

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

I've read so much shit picking apart Harriet Dowling - Warlock's mother - as a character, having her leave Thaddeus with Warlock, befriending Nanny Ashtoreth, coming out as gay and proceeding to date women?? Just totally off the rails from canon and giving her this whole new life beyond vaguely unappreciated government man's wife with obnoxious son. It's made me care sooo much about following these threads others have chosen to unravel

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

Hastur is absolutely my poor little meow meow and I think he should get his Ligur back please and thanks they are the BEST OF FRIENDS in a demon way and ALSO MAYBE lovers depending on your reading idk I love every shade of relationship analyses between them. Also Hastur's actor follows me on Instagram and I'm a little bit in love with him so I'm extra biased. The actor is not a poor little meow meow

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

I think The Archangel Fucking Gabriel™️ getting put through it is a lot of fun. As the text posts say, I want to study him like a bug

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

Not that this fits the category, but I kind of want Sister Mary Loquacious to go to hell and melt Beelzebub's brain with inane chatter. Sent to superhell to commit annoyance crimes

[failbaby]

I have a real life tale of Homeric Epic proportions for you all. I do not condone the actions of anyone in this story

My senior year of high school, I was entrenched in a preposterous scandal between two of my friends.

Guy 1 was this completely indescribable, sexually ambiguous, utterly ridiculous little xc/debate club twink who was an armed libertarian leftist, HYPERfixated on working class history, and VERY intelligent but so hyperactive and deliberately loud/obnoxious that all of our teachers hated him anyway. He called me “Rosita Bonita,” and was accepted to Princeton and CalTech but was going to a mid-tier school nearby because he didn’t want to leave the mountains. 🥺

Guy 2 was an extremely easygoing, widely-beloved football player with a FIANCÉ he’d been with for 3 years (religious people in small towns get engaged young) who was a devout environmentalist and was planning on going to trade school in Italy after graduation. No real reason, he just thought Italy was dope, which I respect. 

Both good guys, both weird

We were all the same friend group (me, the dudes, the fiancé, & several other ppl), and those two were really close. Like if I was slightly more heterosexual I would say “bromance.” The summer before senior year, those guys, another friend of ours, and the fiancé went on an educational environmental science trip to Peru, where they, like, hiked around and camped out in the mountains. I don’t know or care what they were supposed to be learning about the environment up there, I just know that they split their little group of 4 up into a boys tent and girls tent, and these two boys who the Lord God put on this earth to play high school sports started fucking each other in tents in the rocky mountains of Peru.

Which would normally be like, okay, so what, Rose, why are you telling me these dudes’ business, but you have to remember that the second dude had a fiancé, a female fiancé no less, who was on the trip and was sleeping just a few yards away from where these boys were fucking each other. And this is where it morphed into everyone’s business

My friend, the only member of their little group who was not involved, called me from a hotel one night when they’d gone back down out of the mountains and into a town (and thus had cell service again), and she was like, “Rose, you need to help me.”

And I was like “What? What’s wrong?” Panicking, because my four dear friends were very far away in a weird mountain town and I had no idea what could possibly have happened

And she goes “I think that [guy 1] and [guy 2] are having sex, and I don’t know how to tell [fiancé].”

This is news to me, because I was previously SO sure that guy 2 was straight. I was like “I really think you’re losing it”

So we talked it out a little bit and decided that the high altitude was getting to her, and our friend wouldn’t cheat on his fiancé, who he really loved, and our other friend wouldn’t sow division in our close-knit group like that

School started back up however long after they got back, and things were just like. Completely normal for a while, and then after like a month of the whole thing being forgotten and under the bridge, guy 1 becomes overwhelmed with guilt and decides to tell the fiancé that he was in fact fucking her beloved in the Peruvian mountains.

Now, this was a MAJOR blow to the law, serenity, and order of our group, as im sure you know if you’ve ever been involved in a situation where a member of a friend group was cheating with another member of a friend group. All of my friends are very progressive, so it was much more about the cheating and lying than the fact that they were both men, but I would be wrong to say that that was not also a concern, because it came so completely out of nowhere. We were all blindsided (except for my friend, who I had accidentally gaslit into believing this wasn’t happening and she was going crazy from mountain air 🤪)

So. This is where it gets wild

Guy 2 takes the logical path out and decides to just lie and say that this never happened at all. Like, he straight up denies everything guy 1 is alleging.

I don’t know why he did that. You should never lie about something if the other person has screenshots, which guy 1 did. He had screenshots like you would not BELIEVE.

And he IMMEDIATELY took to the public Internet, which my mother uses, with these screenshots.

A lot of people had heard rumors about this by now, because these guys were both athletes and guy 2 was like “popular” or whatever, so it just kinda gets around. Guy 1 decided to feed the people and send the screenshots to the school gossip IG acct (“____ high school tea”), and of course, the person running the page was THRILLED to have such top-tier content so early in the school year, and it was all posted for their 1,188 followers to see.

The screenshots told a story that ran much deeper than two dudes fucking each other on a field trip. I had initially kind of assumed was just a “gay-for-the-stay,” messing around kind of thing, but there were screenshots of texts from guy 2 about getting MARRIED, telling guy 1 that he was his SOULMATE, telling him he “set my heart to flame,” “I love you more than anything,” etc etc., and, most notably, a picture of guy 2 in the act of SUCKING GUY 1’s DICK. Some of these things dated from WEEKS AFTER they got back from Peru.

So, it was clear to me that guy 1 AND the fiancé both felt (justifiably?) extremely fucked over by guy 2 at this point. The previously-airtight group was on the verge of collapse, as all of us had been dragged into this conflict between these 3 mfs. The girl called off the engagement.

Guy 2 wrote a notes app apology to the entire school claiming he had dissociative identity disorder and blaming the entire affair on his gay alter ego. Then he wrote a sad rap begging his fiancé to get back with him.

But the most insane part of all of this is that, since guy 1 AND guy 2 were both 17 when the explicit pic was posted on “[redacted]hstea,” the POLICE got involved. Guy 1 was investigated on CHILD PORNOGRAPHY charges for a picture of him getting his own dick sucked by a peer, as was guy 2, AS WAS the person running the tea account.

(This tea account had ruined lives, so when her identity was revealed, she literally transferred schools within like a week. Or maybe she’s in jail idk)

The charges were dropped and the boys were let off with a warning, because like. From a legal standpoint, who cares, but we All had to go to an internet safety assembly run by cops where they lectured us for two hours about not taking nudies, and EVERYONE was looking at me and my friends, because even though we had nothing to do with it, they KNEW we were affiliated with the defendents, and that was enough for them

Then guy 1 shot out the back window of guy 2’s car, which was the catharsis of the whole event, and it effectively blew over within another month or two.

Our group was split in half by loyalty (we joked and said guy 2 and his fiancé were like our divorcing parents), and I did not see those two in a room together for SEVERAL months, but then there was one weekend in like February that we all got together like old times (except for the fiancé who had moved on to a better man, as she should), and we were talking about going to a party with some of guy 2’s football friends, and guy 1 was like “I’m not gonna do that. You know what they say about me.”

And guy 2 tucked guy 1’s hair behind his ear and said with ZERO hesitation, “But you know I won’t let anything happen to you.”

This is a completely benign interaction, but imagine being me, witnessing this after 8 months of general social hell, child pornography charges, ruined friendships, Megan is missing assemblies, THE most dramatic breakup I’ve ever seen in my life and subsequent SoundCloud raps, shot out car windows, and a fake DID diagnosis, ALL because guy 2 wanted to avoid allegations of gay behavior. For WHAT.

Anyway coronavirus happened and idk what’s going on with them now and I don’t care but that’s my villain origin story

[aesudan-kholin]

If Kaladin had actually given Elhokar hero lessons, how do you think those sessions would have gone?

so... i made a post recently about how i understand (i know lots of things, but not understand) literally nothing about them whatsoever. so answering this ask isnt going to keep in line with what i usually do of only saying something if im confident in it and reasonably sure it wont change later. AKA me from the future might not agree with what i think and say now. so just putting that out there.

so the thing about this is it probably never could have happened. elhokar was desperate, and in his desperation, whether this idea of kaladin teaching him was something that he had been stewing on for weeks to months, or something he thought of while drunk (i imagine it would be the former, though he probably didn't think about it in specific, accomplishable ways), he finally worked up the courage with the help of some alcohol to ask kaladin to do this completely un fleshed out plan of figuring out how to make elhokar not be a shit king. now, this was doomed to fail for a few reasons.

number one: elhokar had a very very good chance of legitimately being incapable of being a good king.

maybe he could have ended up (with some guidance) as a good leader at some smaller scale, like a small town, but even that is debatable. kaladin instinctively knows things, and while i definitely think he had a negative bias against elhokar and his King Skillz in that moment due their relationship being at a low point, his instinct saying 'yeah thats never gonna happen' was probably completely correct.

number two: kaladin probably would not agree to it.

2a. in that moment where he did ask, kaladin thought he was being weird as hell and was so fucking confused. he didn't know at all where this was coming from, because he is blind to how other people view him a lot of the time, and by extension how elhokar had been idolizing him. they probably hadn't seen much of each other ever since elhokar tried to execute him and throw him in jail. from kaladin's perspective, elhokar tried to kill him, then is coming to him like he has all the secrets to life, which is very baffling to him. unrelated sidenote i need to rewrite this stupid coppermind article on elhokar i did not write it but i want to fix some shit in here. so kaladin in that situation is like WTF????? in his head but out loud he's like 'um.. i dont know if thats possible for you' which is a rejection. i don't know if he would have said the same words if he was at a relative high point in his opinion of elhokar rather than potentially the lowest point that he got in wor that he was in that chapter (thinking about it the chapter where he was in prison might have been the lowest but this is a low point is what im saying), but thats probably an opinion he would have kept throughout the bumpy road of whatever tf their relationship is.

2b. kaladin has shit to do, man. dude was working double triple shifts in words of radiance, got into urithiru and was like the only windrunner, and was training overtime to train some windrunners to have some squires ready for the expedition to kholinar. after he got back he was made a highmarshall and we dont see too much in the ob-row timeskip but he wasnt getting much sleep either, and he probably had a lot of shit to do when he was awake, battles aside. when would he have had the time to even begin to think about lesson plans for this goal that in his head is sort of unachievable, let alone find time for actually talking to elhokar about shit.

so like even if elhokar did ask at a point where kaladin felt less like he was absolute crap and more like [??????? but more positive than the absolute crap thing], kaladin would still have been like dude what. and kaladin also would have been like dude i do not have the time. even in an elhokar lives au (because the first time kaladin would have potentially had any time whatsoever for that is post-kholinar), shallan would probably be the radiant he was interacting more due to lightweaver reasons. and elhokar has a great deal of respect for shallan as well, certainly not as much as he has for kaladin, but he does value shallan's skill and opinion, and shallan would not only be a lot more willing to give elhokar some support and advice, they would be working closer together anyway because of their shared order. he wouldn't be getting this nebulous "secret to life" stuff that he wanted to get from the guy who survived a highstorm, almost single handedly saved an army, beat shardbearers with nothing but a spear, and fell into the chasms only to crawl back out again even after a highstorm, but, and my future self might disagree on this, but he might have just been looking for advice on how to live his life.

but, all of that aside. lets say that kaladin for some reason decided that it was personally important to him to train elhokar to not be a shit leader, that he potentially thought it was not a lost cause, and if he did then he cared enough to try anyway. postponing kholinar (which he would have the power to do in this case, since elhokar would be listening to whatever he said*) might have given him more time for that after that request, or else he might have had to think about it and agree post-kholinar, which would involve an elhokar lives au, which i dont want to deal with all the implications so im going to say in this scenario he accepted after elhokar asked in wor 80, or maybe directly after urithiru was discovered (aka later that night) with a promise to start teaching him right after he got back from hearthstone. god i feel like alternate history hub. the later that night thing would have been more likely because that is after his whole 180 about elhokar. that way, the weird intense commitment to help elhokar be a better leader was baked in to all the other weird dramatic shifts about how he thought about elhokar.

what i think kaladin would do?

possibility 1: he would have elhokar start small. i think he would have elhokar teach a single person to do something. he would get a new recruit, and tell elhokar to teach him to be a soldier. maybe the new recruit is one of lopens cousins who saw elhokar blackout drunk and being pushed around by lopens mom to eat his food, so he's not intimidated by him. the new guy not being intimidated is key, because he can't just do what elhokar says because he's the king. after the day, kaladin talks to the new recruit then elhokar, seeing what went right and wrong, then tells elhokar what changes to make. if somehow everything went right with that, kaladin would next give him a group of 5 to lead in some way, and if that worked, a group of 50.

possibility 2: a job shadow. either kaladin job shadowing elhokar, watching all his fuck ups happen in real time, and constantly whispering advice which is offputting to the people elhokar is meeting with but its funny. the issue here comes with kaladin not knowing a lot of political theory. as good of a leader as kaladin is (which is insanely), elhokar is more well versed in political theory (as an example think of the time kaladin was like 'why is beating sadeas in a duel going to wreck him its literally just a duel' there would be a lot of situations in elhokar's work as a king that kaladin would probably be similarly confused on), even if he doesn't apply it well. either that, or elhokar job shadowing kaladin, watching kaladin train the windrunners, and breaking to explain some things to elhokar every once in a while, which elhokar would theoretically learn from. the issue here of course comes with how both of these guys both have sort of incredibly important jobs that they could probably only carve out a few hours at most for something like that. unless elhokar abdicated.

abdication.... no i shouldn't go into all of this this should be a separate 2000 word post. but abdication could come into play and is related to that *asterisk earlier.

i can not think of a third possibility, although there probably is one. i would think that possibility 1 would be more likely in my opinion.

some meme possibilities i came up with:

- kaladin lets elhokar borrow syl and elhokar wears a hat and syl is in the hat pulling bits of his hair like ratatouille and basically operating elhokar and she makes him be an ideal windrunner whenever she feels like he's fucking up

- kaladin presides over the document signing meetings and whenever elhokar is about to sign a document he thinks isn't good he slaps the pen out of his hand and has a disapproving glare. elhokar has to do the walk of shame across the room to get the pen everytime this happens

- training montage with "Gonna Fly Now" in the background where there is no dialogue and it just shows elhokar visibly failing and he tries to lift a rock with a piece of paper on it that says "kingly responsibility" and fails and kaladin shakes his head, then there's a training montage of idk him learning the spear or training other bridgemen or other kaladin-y things and wearing a bandana for no reason then by the end of the montage he successfully lifts the kingly responsibility rock

- they just completely switch jobs for a while while elhokar gets his shit together. all hail king kaladin

(+ my first thoughts)

[brynfelan]

I do not wanna constantly bombard you with asks...but dear god my brain is just ON IT right now idk. Izuru and Hajime be twins again, and...Kuzuhina what can i say they're cute and stupid (Maybe KuzuPekoHina? If ur comfortable with it? If not then just Kuzuhina is also fantastic).

Hajime, Natsumi, and Sato form a somewhat uneasy friendship (uneasy because Natsumi and Sato) because they're consistently harassed by the Reserve Course for hanging out with "those snobby, elitist Ultimate jerkoffs."

The divide and tension between the two is horrendous, there's contempt and hatred on both sides, so those three get a TON of crap from the other Main classes (not 78 they're precious babes) and the Reserve course for hanging out with class 77. It's mainly just mental and emotional warfare, which isn't fun but they can deal...kind of.

But when Hajime starts dating his brother's classmate(s), the harassment gets physical as well. Which is infinitely harder to hide. Eventually class 77 finds out when they're all hanging out, Hajime flinches when Soda smacks his back a little too hard,and that's when Hajime, Sato, and Natsumi are forced to spill the beans. And then all hell breaks loose. Class 77 are gonna go to war. :)

oh noooo this is Too Much. i love it. (also please continue bombard me with asks i am LOVING this)

natsumi, hajime and sato are definitely a Survival Friendship (tm), you know the kind. all the bullied kids are friends, because nobody else will be friends with them. except hajime likes both of them and wishes they could get along better, because sato is sweet and natsumi’s fucking hilarious and if they just calmed tf down it’d be a perfect trio. actually, when things are a little chilled out and they’re hanging out with 77b, they work really well! it’s just when they’re on their own with hajime that it gets hairy. despite the dicey sato/natsumi friendship though, they’re an absolute solid wall at school because they HAVE to be. they might kinda hate each other’s guts for various reasons, but they will defend the other to the death for hanging out with the main course. natsumi can, and has punched a dude in the face for making fun of sato for hanging out with mahiru. similarly, sato has 100% punched a dude in the face for making fun of hajime and natsumi for hanging out with THEIR BROTHERS. hajime will bitch anybody out for making fun of either sato or natsumi. this is a friendship based around survival, and they are ALL capable of putting their differences aside for five fucking minutes every so often, because they know they’re stronger as a unit rather than individually.

it starts getting worse when some rat in the reserve course sees hajime holding hands with fuyuhiko, who’s holding hands with peko. whoever it is that sees them corners him and calls him a “main course whore” or something like that, because he couldn’t settle for just one, right? and like... natsumi knows. sato knows too. they ALL suffer because of it. but none of them tell 77b at first, because like... then they’d worry and they’re ultimates and have bigger shit to deal with than some petty reserve course drama, right? point is, they all get very good at covering for each other when one of them has a weird bruise, but the one thing they don’t account for is soda thanking hajime for something, and giving him that bro slap on the back, and hajime immediately freaks out and just punches him right in the face.

like dude, he’s never done that before. he’s always been a little bit touchy about shit like that, but he’s never actually decked anybody before (that 77b know about, anyway). and everybody’s crowding him like “what the fuck was that”, and sato’s the first to speak up because mahiru’s giving her this look like “you don’t look surprised, what the fuck is going on?”

so sato starts, and then natsumi starts talking, and finally hajime explains what’s been going on. fuyuhiko is immediately pissed. peko, who’s usually the calm and collected one already has the sword ready to go. the whole class is absolutely pissed about this, and like they’ve had their share of incidents for hanging out with the reserve course, but they have yukizome backing them up and class 78 at all times and nothing has ever gotten that bad. the class have to be talked down from coming for fucking blood, because that’ll just make everything worse, and none of them want to transfer out of hope’s peak because then they won’t get to hang out as much anymore. in their minds, it’s worth it.

so, they hatch a less violent plan. first, they go to administration, who basically do nothing because the reserve course is only there for cash, they don’t actually give a fuck about the kids. when that doesn’t work, mahiru starts following them around from a distance with her camera - she records whenever somebody tries something with either natsumi, sato or hajime. in the week she does this, she has enough evidence to basically shut hope’s peak down.

they end up asking class 78 for help, and with kyoko’s help in getting their foot in the door to the headmaster’s office, they’ve got two full main course classes threatening to leave and leak this shit to the press if something isn’t done. (yes i have decided that class 78 are wholesome and would stand with them on this. even byakuya. with some nudging from makoto. but byakuya already knows he doesn’t need hope’s peak to be successful. and like, i’m taking liberties with juno and mukuro but this is an AU where neither are ultimate despair they’re just the ultimate fashionista and ultimate soldier and are absolutely delightful). 

at first the board are like “if we remove every problematic reserve course student, then we won’t have a reserve course” and everybody’s like “well that’s fucking fine, don’t have a reserve course. these three will simply have to be your reserve course, because otherwise you’re missing two classes and wouldn’t that look really fucking bad for ya?”

i haven’t decided whether they succeed in bullying the board into actually protecting their friends, or whether this becomes a huge scandal and hope’s peak shuts down. choose your own adventure!

option 1: the board absolutely shits themselves at two whole classes threatening to leave, and expels every student that they’ve got evidence against. any that don’t have evidence against them are on thin fucking ice, and they learn to leave natsumi, sato and hajime alone and let them just live their fucking lives and have fun with their friends.

option 2: the board thinks they’re bluffing, and says “fine, do it”. so, both classes end up leaving along with hajime, natsumi and sato. byakuya uses his connections to leak the info to as many influential people as possible, and the reserve course students start fuckin dropping like flies with parents pulling them out after seeing the shit that goes unchecked there. they only have one main course class, and potential recruits start refusing to go to hope’s peak because like... if that’s how people are treated there, they don’t wanna be a part of it, no matter how prestigious. the hope’s peak name gets dragged through the fucking mud, and classes 77, 78, and our reserve course trio end up transferring to a separate less well-known school and just living their lives like dumb teenagers, doing normal school (which the main course students are kinda terrible at for the most part, hajime natsumi and sato have to basically be their tutors lmao) and having a fucking good time after all that’s over.

[cecilyneville]

the spanish princess ep 2:

once more unto the breach, my fellow clowns

jsyk, i am skipping a lot of scenes bc i have far better things to do with my time (even under stay-at-home orders), and i cannot for the life of me watch the maggie pole/thomas more scenes. like what is the point of keeping maggie around, she is so boring. andrew buchan what were you THINKING signing up for this 

reggie pole looks like a weird cross bw ben whishaw and sam riley

ok i take back what i said about laura carmichael last week - she’s a damn sight more talented than you-know-who. maggie still boring as hell tho

i can’t wait for the catherine/lina friendship blow-up...it’s coming & lina deserves so much better

oveido’s speech about childbirth and war...you been reading the mirror & the light dude?

THE GLOVE FROM ANNE OF BRITTANY!!!

james iv: i have done nothing wrong, ever, in my life / me: i know this and i love you

as someone with a catherine of aragon icon i just want to say that i really cannot stand tsp’s catherine, she has no redeeming qualities. ef keeps trying to make her likeable by asking oviedo to stay and letting meg keep james’ body but none of it actually gels with her behaviour

[dramatic militaristic music] really just sums up the lameness of this soundtrack

margaret’s prophetic dreams! i wish they’d included the part about her queen’s jewels turning to widow’s pearls

ANGUS DOUGLAS. ANGUS DOUGLAS. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, EMMA FROST

god he’s not even hot what’s the POINT. angus is supposed to be a hot dumbass fool who is just like “hey margaret i know you’re mourning your husband and have just given birth to his posthumous son and are trying to rule the country but are you dtf yet”. what did i do to deserve an ugly angus

i don’t get why they don’t also have meg pregnant at flodden. given that catherine is presumably going to lash out with jealousy at lina, mary, bessie - literally anyone who has given birth to a living son - i think it would have been a good choice, as well as drawing direct parallels between the two women

meg’s costumes are my fave. the colour palette suits georgie and her red riding cap is v cute

catherine’s clown shoes slapping on the floor as she storms off to war

like...it’s supposed to be such a moving scene and i’m just like wow she is literally the biggest moron to have ever lived

oh now she’s going into the enemy tent. honestly can james just kill her on the spot and then the rest of the show can be about margaret in scotland and mary & brandon in france

“he’s fighting for gold from king louis” shock horror! has catherine never heard of the auld alliance or???

like, i know they’re not actually wearing kilts, but the tartan is still stupidly ahistorical - we get it, they’re scottish! 

love how catherine’s trying to do all this shit to rouse support, meanwhile in twp all elizabeth had to say was “do it for me” and all the lords were like yeah sure we love you lizzie

just in case the childbirth/war analogy wasn’t clear enough, we fucking get it emma

i’m not even going to comment about catherine physically fighting and actually killing people, this is the dumbest thing i have ever seen

meg saying james was her “best friend” would be lovely if there had been literally anything demonstrating that. georgie’s performance here is so good though. emotion! actual emotion!

so...catherine rode all the way back to london still covered in blood from the battle...once again i have no comment

also no comment on a very pregnant catherine looking wistfully on at a bird in a cage. i want to die

i know i’ve been going on about how good ruairi o’connor is - and he’s good - but i feel as if he’s a little miscast? idk, he’s just not rowdy enough for me to believe him as henry viii. his appearance and manner is very similar to jacob collins-levy though, which i appreciate

not nearly enough mary this episode imo

still stan the hell out of bessie blount. the strawberry-blonde hair! the rosebud mouth! the eoy vibes!!! (no i am not trying to suggest henry has an oedipal complex, that’s for d*vid st*rkey to do lol)

i hate that all these more interesting characters spend the whole time praising catherine for behaving like an absolute clod

emma frost has no idea how pregnancy and childbirth work (remember rosa’s miscarriage in s1?)

anyway, here’s hoping next ep will have some fun margaret in scotland scenes (lowering the portcullis at edinburgh castle...i can only dream) 

[phoebehalliwell]

s7 au: they've defeated the Avatars and saved Leo, and nothing else could possibly go wrong, right? and then Paige finds out that she's pregnant, and the father of her baby is dead, and she's never going to see him again because the Elders are petty like that. but that's fine, she can handle that - what'dya mean the cute parole officer at the grocery store's been flirting with her? how's she supposed to deal with that?

okay bro first you gotta let me digest the idea of a paige/kyle baby bc uhh that genetic mix at energy good god that kids gonna be buckwild they’re gonna get like an idea and no one will ever be able to talk them out of it stubborn as hell and twice as determined honestly could probably kill god holy shit. okay. piage kyle baby. i don’t know whether i want to say henry’s really observant or henry’s really dumb. i don’t know which is more in character. i don’t know which is funnier. either he’s definitely falling for this girl he met and then oh my god wait is she pregnant bc she’s wearing flats and complaining about her feet being swollen and she’s drinking decaf and she keeps placing her hand on her belly when she’s resting i think she’s pregnant but she doesn’t have a wedding ring is she a single mom or like is this like a like committed relationship but they’re not married situation can i ask it’s weird if i ask some henry uses like all his brain cells to try to figure out what happened but he keeps hitting weird dead ends is she married to a fed? what is going on right now it seems like she’s flirting back but what if i’m just projecting aaaa i should probably leave her alone because she’s probably just like not into me spoiler alert henry like does not leave paige alone they keep hanging out but henry doesn’t have the balls to make the first move and paige is thinking oh maybe he’s not that into me maybe i should just give up on this maybe i like him so i’m projecting onto him that he likes me when he really doesn’t and these two clowns are just like dancing around each other and paige invites henry over to the manner and henry’s putting on his little detective cap like father? is there a father somewhere?? and henry’s thinking maybe okay maybe the dad’s not in the picture maybe i should just tell henry how i feel and paige is like okay. i’m gonna tell him i like him. and i’m gonna deal with the fallout. whichever way it goes. i can do this. okay. but they’re both like stepping over each others words and it’s awkward as fuck because clearly they’ve both got something big to say but no no you go first no oh i can go first oh do you and phoebe’s talking down the stairs when she almost falls flat on her ass like boom and she walks into the kitchen with the most confused look on her face like is coop in here and paige and henry are like no sorry and phoebe’s like oh cool but she just keeps looking confused and walking closer to them and she stands right next to henry like hmmm and then walks over to paige like hmmm and then just goes paige sweetie can i talk to you for a second and pulls her into the dining room like i’ve got two big pieces of news for you number one i think i just got my empathy back and number two is that boy in the kitchen is in love with you.

or. paige is barely showing all that she and henry meet they hit it off they’re dating paige worries it might get a little weird when it becomes obvious she’s pregnant should she mention that right now no she’ll cross that bridge when she comes to it and things are going great and now she’s pretty obviously showing but henry seems fine with it and he helps her build a crib from ikea all that they go to pick out which color to paint the walls of the nursery blah blah blah paige and piper do pre-natal yoga again simply because piper insists paige experience what she experience so she could see how it’s so annoying blah blah blah and paige and henry are looking over a list of baby names and paige is like i know there’s this whole “p” tradition but idk it’s already been broken twice and i’ve never been much for tradition and henry’s like haha yeah but like you can see the gears turning in his head and paige is like yeah i think i might name the baby like [do we have any logic behind the name kat and tamora? why were they chosen?] isabel [since i’m sticking with the perhaps unintentional shakespeare theme] and henry’s like yeah haha ......................... you’re naming the baby? and paige is like henry..... do you.... it’s my........ you do know i’m pregnant right? it’s like six months in at this point and it’s like you can see a light switch go off in henry’s head like Ohhhhh!! and paige is like dude. what the fuck did you think was happening for like. the past five months. and henry’s like idk i though one of your sisters was pregnant i didn’t realize and paige is like how did you not realize i’m literally pregnant i literally have a baby growing inside of me right now how did you miss that?? and henry’s like idk!! i wasn’t gonna mention anything! and paige is like you thought i was just rapidly gaining weight?? and henry’s like sorta!! but like! i still love you! whether you’re just rapidly gaining weight or growing a baby! : ) and paige is like henry you’re so stupid. marry me.

whichever way you choose henry’s gonna be raising that baby and honestly i think the resemblance would be similar enough that people just genuinely think henry’s the father. i also don’t think kyle would know he had a daughter like at all. i think the elders would work very hard to keep him away from the charmed line and Definitely would not want him to know he has a child bc i think that really does come in conflict with your whitelighter duties you’d probably be less likely to put yourself in harms way to protect your charge bc then you’d be leaving your little baby behind without a father the elders are like No One Tell Kyle but i think henry’s all like who is like isabel’s dad? like what is that story, why isn’t he around? if it’s not too personal. and paige is like oh um. well, he’s dead. and henry’s like oh my god i’m so sorry and paige is like well he’s not Dead dead he’s a whitelighter. and henry’s like ?? and paige is like yeah you know he’s like born again given a new body and magic powers, sent to protect witches and future whitelighters and henry’s like [does not know] oh yeah totally. so like. does he ever stop by? i’d love to meet him. because like. henry’s seen a lot of kids who’s dad stepped out on them. hell his dad stepped out on him. and you learn to grow around it but there’s still like this y’know desire to know. to know who you came from. and paige isn’t even really thinking about it she’s like no i haven’t seem kyle since he was human. i don’t even think he knows he has a child and henry’s like What. and paige is like yeah you know the elders all that and henry’s like [does not know] yeah but like?? should you tell him he has a kid? would he want to know?? and paige is thinking about it bc like henry might have a point and she is a mf charmed one she should be able to summon kyle and like. he does deserve to know! so she and henry trudge on up to the attic and paige summons kyle and henry’s holding little baby isabel and kyle’s like woah um hi paige? what’s going on? who’s that? and paige is like this is henry, ny husband, and uhh isabel! and kyle’s congratulations?? why am i here? and paige is lik yeah um i should clarify you’re the father. and kyle’s like 😶😶😶 bc that man has never properly processed an emotion in his Life and henry’s like do you want to hold her and kyle’s like no bc wtf that’s a baby he doesn’t do babies how are you even supposed to hold a baby and paige is obviously a little hurt by this and she’s like oh i just thought you would want to meet her and kyle’s like no i do i um. thanks you telling me. good luck to you both. and orbs out and paige is like what the fuck?? but like henry’s seen it before where a guy realizes surprise you are a dad here’s your baby it’s a bit of a shock to the system so he like tells paige something like you know uhh like don’t worry it’s clearly a lot to process i’m sure he’s got a lot of stuff to do like i think he’s really grateful to know all that and paige is like yeah whatever lmao if he doesn’t want to be a part of his baby’s life that’s fine because i don’t need him you and i are gonna raise this baby abd we’re gonna be great parents and fuck kyle for not wanting to hold his child bc uhh paige is also Not Great at processing his emotions. 

but like a couple weeks later paige is off at magic school doing stuff and doing things and henry’s bottle feeding little isabel and he hears orbing and he turns around fully expecting to see paige but it’s actually kyle and kyle’s like hi. i’m kyle. and henry’s like no i know we’ve met before and they’re both sort of standing there bc henry’s not sure what kyle wants and kyle’s not even really sure what he wants but idk he just wants to like. meet his daughter. and henry can sorta pick up on this and he’s like Do You Want To Hold Her? and kyle’s like i don’t know how and henry’s like dw it’s p easy and he gives the baby to kyle and makes sure her head is supported all that and like little baby bel coos and kyle looks like he might be feeling his first ever emotion ever and henry’s like i think she’s happy to meet you : ) and kyle’s like :’) and henry teaches kyle how to properly bottle feed a baby and kyle feeds that baby and the two just like. talk. and kyle’s like not to be weird but i have been like. watching over you. since i found out about. you know. like. everything. and henry’s like no yeah cool but like he secretly Is Weirded Out and kyle’s like paige is really happy you know? and henry’s like yeah i know. and kyle’s like i don’t know if i ever could have made her that happy and henry’s like ooookay don’t know how to respond to that but 👍 and kyle’s like just i’m glad paige found you. i’m glad they both found you and henry can tell he’s talking about isabel as well and kyle keeps going and he’s like i don’t know if i really have what it takes to be like. a good dad. but like. you do. and henry didn’t really think he did because every day he’s just trying his goddamn best but he is constant worried he’s gonna fuck this up and kyle’s like. i don’t know. what i’m trying to say is like. i’m happy you’re going to be the one in her life. and henry’s like you can be in her life too and kyle’s like i can’t. it’s against the rules, all that, i wouldn’t want to bring down the wrath of the elders. and henry’s nodding pensively but in his head he’s like [ThE wrATH oF The WHaT nOw] but kyle keeps going like i’m not going to be able to be there for her, but i’m glad you will. and he sorta pauses and he was like. my parents were killed. when i was really little. i know what it feels like to grow up alone, feeling like you were somehow abandoned. and i don’t- i don’t want that for my daughter. and henry’s like i think i understand that better than most and kyle’s like i know. i checked up on you. and henry’s like oh cool. and kyle’s like i jsut want to say. i trust you, henry. and i’m happy for you. and he gives him back isabel and he orbs out.

and kyle really isn’t around for isabel’s childhood. there are no more surprise visits, any of that. sometimes isabel will start cooing as if she senses somebody, but no one every materializes. i think paige and henry would go on to have another daughter of their own (named beatrice i am sticking with this shakespeare thing) and the pair would grow up as sisters. and i think sometimes, at christmas, there would be two extra presents under the tree with no name on the “from” tag, addresses to little bel and bea, and paige and henry would know that there’s still somebody watching out for them

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

so i was reading one of those lame “10 red flags that are long term relationship no-no’s” or some dumb shit listicle articles where some points on the list are actually legit and some seem a little banal to a point. this one, being an example to also call out my 14/15 year old self for screaming at clear braces boy when he updated his relationship status and sent teenage me a relationship request back in 2010/year 9 (please mind that i actually didn’t hold the same feelings as he did. but it was one of those stupid forced high school relationships that a whole year group thinks should happen bc two kids just talk to each every fucking day because they’re J U S T G O D D A M N E D F R I E N D S for fucks sake):

like on some levels, sure. NOT going “public” on your relationship on social media could be a red flag.... but generally???? i don’t think it is, especially when so many of my old friends barely update their relationship statuses (like they have it hidden or still list themselves single bc like who cares, right?).... or even post photos/statuses of themselves with their s/o, unless it’s a big thing like buying a house/land for a house, getting engaged, their wedding etc at all anymore.

hell, it’d be hard for someone to “go public” on social media with me as a partner.... considering the fact that i’ve never bothered with making an instagram account. i’ve deleted my snapchat and don’t think “snap scores” etc count for anything in making healthy relationships. like how dumb can you be (unless of course social media is your job) basing your relationships on snapchat scores and/or instagram likes or doing couples social media challenges??? or retweet amounts??? like really??? that’s a fucking recipe for jealousy and couple self-doubt and comparisons etc right there, bud.

why document every part of your relationship on social media???? okay, sure. if they don’t post ANYTHING of you together; maybe that’s a problem for some people???? but honestly. i personally wouldn’t mind that. bc god. do we really need everyone nosing in on our relationship business, dude??? like really??? i don’t want people gossiping about us or whatever the fuck idek. or i don’t want to be that absolutely nauseating couple that posts photos on every social media platform like every fucking day or whatever being all “i love you so much babe you’ll always be my 🌏!!!!” to the point where like 90% of your friend/follower lists block you bc you’re just that irritating. basically this is what i went off at clear braces boy for in year 9 tbh.

just idek. i think the “not posting your relationship status on social media” and “not posting generally of you on social media” would differ person to person. bc i don’t need you to perform your love for me on my social media feed, bro.... like some dating show such as idek, love island? that’s not how you prove to me that we’re serious??? although i might get hate for this considering that i’ve never been in a relationship (bar the one mentioned above) so what would i know???

but at the same time, like it’s kinda banal doing these things by your mid20s right???? like i’m not 14 anymore. we should keep our relationship private bc you know how social media is these days.... even just generally even with people you know. like i sometimes play guessing games with who has a partner or whose broken up with their partners or whose getting married etc on my own fb feed or lurking through old friends who deleted me/never had me on social media in the first place profiles to see how they’re doing and who they’re dating (if they are). like..... it’s weird man.

and it’s even more concerning if you’re a social media person like a youtuber or a popular instagrammer (or instagram couple) or popular twitter account person or whatever. like people can be so fucking awful to famous people’s/accidentally famous people’s partners with like sending death threats or whatever..... that why would you even BOTHER posting about your relationships when you get those creepy asf fans doing that???? like idek man.

and finally when you think about those memes that say things such as:

- “yeah miss/mr he’s/she’s etc etc my world!!!! who’s your new “world” this week? like, damn bitch. are you building a fucking universe each week?”

or

- “gonna call up all my tinder matches at once to see if they’d like being on the bachelorette starring me!!”

or

- “tagging your crush in memes like “these cats are us: i’m the little cat and you’re the big cat” to drop MAJOR HINTS 😂🙃. am i right ladies????”

or whatever other garbage dating meme tweets that you can think of... because if you tag someone on them, on some level, you’re showing your relationship with the person anyway??? like obvs it’s not a lot. that’s a given. but people can read so deep into that sometimes and think you’re dating the person or something when in reality you’re just friends.

for example, i always get asked about two dudes who like/react to my fb statuses quite often and who i tag in memes often with “uh. yeah. what’s actually happening there???” by my best/close friends and i’m like “honestly? i have no idea. but i’ll keep you updated”. but if someone i’ve known for ages, but has never bothered to reach out to me for like 10 years, just randomly dropped me a dm to ask about this sitch i’d be like “yeah janina, thanks for your concern. but like.... we haven’t spoken in years???? idk why you suddenly think my love life... or even my life in general past “i hope she’s doing okay”.... is your business all of a sudden” like idk guys. social media is so fucking invasive and weird and toxic in so many ways to relationships that anything can be taken out of context. and don’t even get me started on the memories throwback function that could take you down some terrible roads (like if you were in an abusive relationship or something) if you never delete shit from your profile.

yeah. anyway. it’s bleh. and i don’t think that your partner not constantly updating your relationship on fb or being awkward about updating their relationship status or whatever the fuck, should be considered a red flag in some sense; and it can mean different things to different people. what i’m getting at is: why can’t we have privacy anymore?

people can feel free to call me shady or whatever. but i’m not being shady in any way, shape, or form. i’m questioning whether people really need to air their relationships in full (no matter whether they’re genuinely reciprocal and love filled; or unhealthy and unrequited- like my stalker back in years 11/12... and also clear braces boy).... and/or at the end of a relationship... air any or all of their dirty laundry through their social media feeds. it’s unhealthy asf that social media rules our lives that much. and that it seems almost to be a fucking requirement to share EVERYTHING about your life on social media to whoever, whenever. finally i’m saying that showing your love has become almost like a competition against other couples going “official” on different social media platforms by updating their rs status or tagging each other in their posts or writing corny lovey-dovey statuses with the starry eyed couple in a photo underneath. like ugh. i hate it.

[personne-reblogs]

Hello! Idk if you still accepting ficlet prompt or not, but if you do, would you mind if I request a combination of 2 fluff prompts between 52. “i’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.” and 18. “are you that desperate?” “for you, yes.”, for OPM ship Batarou? Thank you very much 🙏💖

Whoopsie, I went a little wild with this one... well, you didn’t give me any word count and I was very inspired by the shameless flirt so I included prompts 55, 61, 62 and 63 as well. Thanks Anon, I had so much fun!! Hope y’all will like it!

Fandom: One Punch Man Ship: Batarou Word count: 4k Summary: Lately, Badd has been haunted by a ghost. Kinda. It looks like a guy with white spiky hair, but Badd's the only one to see it. It's following him everywhere, and it's able to help him fight monsters, and it Won't. Stop. Flirting.

Read under the cut or read on AO3!

A Ghost Story

***

There have been better days, Badd sighs to himself. The rain that ruined his carefully stylished hair this morning, the Hero Association meeting that took his entire afternoon, the busy traffic that almost made him late for his ice cream appointment with Zenko, the empty fridge that has him walking to the nearest nightshop at this late hour.

“You look amazing tonight,” a predatory voice purrs behind him.

Ah, yes. And the ghost that has been following him for days and won’t shut the fuck up.

“You’re still here, huh?” Badd asks without thinking, and immediately regrets it.

“Not like I’ve got anywhere else to be, dumbass,” the ghost replies, and Badd suddenly feels tired. He’s heard this shit, like, a thousand times already, and it’s been less than a week. “You should have registered by now. Nobody’s that stupid.”

“Hey, watch it, asshole,” Badd grunts defensively. “‘s been a long day, okay?”

“Oh yeah? How come I didn’t see any of that?”

There’s a smirk in the ghost’s tone, and Badd doesn’t even need to turn around to know there’s a teasing look printed on its face.

“Not every hard day is about fighting, y’know. Regular human stuff is exhausting too.”

“Right,” the ghost says, and there’s a pout in that.

Badd walks through the night shop's door and automatically goes for the drink aisle. He knows the ghost comes in too, but it mercifully keeps quiet.

It first appeared after Badd killed a random tiger-level monster on his way back from Zenko’s school. It has the form of a dude with strange white, spiky hair. A dude who looks like he practises a lot of sport - something contact-ish, martial arts, maybe. At first Badd thought it really was a random guy that had arrived after the monster was dead, but then the thing had followed him everywhere, claiming it was stuck with him, and Badd had realized he was the only one to see it. Creepy.

Now the ghost - that’s all Badd can think of to describe it - is part of his life, whether he likes it or not. It usually appears at night, when it’s dark outside, maybe cuz it doesn’t like daylight or some shit. Except it also appears each time Badd is in a fight. Even in plain day. Hell if he knows why.

“Keep the change,” he tells the cashier before heading back home with a fresh bottle of coke. He’s addicted to it these days. Can’t sleep early, so he might as well treat himself with something sweet while he endures endless conversations with the thing.

“I’ve always wanted to try it,” the ghost says conversationally as soon as they’re out in the street, because of course it won’t keep quiet any longer. God, Badd feels so tired.

“I’d gladly share it with you, but, you know,” he replies as mockingly as he can, turning around and slightly shaking the bottle before opening it and taking a long sip. He makes a show of savouring it just because he can and the thing can’t. It can’t touch anything real, actually, and isn’t that a fucking ghost thing?

Except it does manage to hit monsters in fights. It has happened before. Weird.

The ghost narrows its eyes at him and crosses its arms, but a twisted smile stretches its lips.

“Yeah, but you offered anyways. See? You’re cute when you’re half asleep.”

It really Won’t. Stop. Teasing.

Will it?

***

It’s two in the afternoon when he gets a call from the Hero Association. There’s a demon level threat across town, he’s the closest S-class hero around. He immediately goes to the location they sent him - he was bored anyway.

He’s surprised by the looks of the monster once he’s there. For its level, it happens to be… small, actually. Not even the size of a human being. It jumps in and out of sight, hides behind public bins, and destroys buildings as if they were nothing.

Shit. That one’s gonna be a pain in the ass.

“Fucking finally,” an unexpected, hungry voice hisses behind him, and he realizes he almost forgot about The Thing.

It’s been two entire weeks and he almost bloody forgot.

“Stay outta my way,” Badd orders, his grip tightening on his bat, his eyes searching the place to find the monster back. It’s gonna be complicated enough without the ghost distracting him.

“Yeah, right,” the voice laughs next to him.

“Dude, I really have no time for yer -”

He stops mid-sentence because there is suddenly a building collapsing beside him, and he doesn’t even have time to swear before he gets a glimpse of the monster across the street. It seems like it is avoiding contact, staying out of reach -

And then, in a blur, the ghost rushes past him to throw itself on the monster.

Literally.

He can’t make out what happens after that, not amongst the dust from the demolition, so he runs after them.

When he finds them back, the monster lies motionless on the floor. The ghost is casually sitting on a rubble, an arm thrown around its knee, a ferocious smile spreading wide on its face.

“Gosh, I’ve missed this,” it says as if it were talking about going for a walk in the sun.

It looks that refreshed, at least. Neat.

“What the shit?!” Badd barks, because even though he’s impressed, he doesn’t like losing control of the situation.

“Not the first time I give you a hand, you know. No big deal.”

“I would’ve handled this perfectly well on my own, thank you very much.”

“Yeah, and you would’ve destroyed the entire fucking city, so, you’re welcome.”

“Ghost, I swear -”

“Oh, honey, I thought we were past that,” the ghost says with an exaggerated hurt look.

“Past what?” Badd asks confusedly.

“I have a name, you know.”

“No, I don’t.”

“What?”

The ghost looks genuinely surprised, and it shouldn’t, but it makes Badd feel extremely satisfied.

“You never mentioned it. Your name.”

“I - really?”

The ghost shakes its head with an incredulous chuckle. It gets up from the rubble, comes a few steps closer, and presents Badd its hand.

“Call me Garou.”

Badd shouldn’t try to shake that hand. It doesn’t exist. His own hand would pass through it and he’d look like a fucking moron.

But he’s curious, so he does it anyway.

And it turns out it feels exactly like a regular handshake.

“Hi. I’m Badd.”

***

He his a martial art type of guy.

Badd has seen him in enough fights to know for sure now. It’s not just the vibe and the looks - whenever they’re in a fight, the ghost Garou uses sharp, precise techniques Badd could only dream of.

Not that he’s interested in martial arts, but he has to admit it’s quite effective.

Especially when Garou single-handedly brings strong ass opponents down like that.

 Hot.

“Pfff, no fun,” Garou sighs, disappointed, before coming back to Badd. He always does. Something to do with him being physically unable to wander too far away from his human host, or some shit.

“It isn’t supposed to be fun, but whatever,” Badd points out while poking at his own enemy with his bat, just to check. It’s dead alright.

“You say that because you’re not strong enough to have a good time.”

“Right,” Badd says. He has given up on reacting to Garou’s teasing. It’s no use.

“Maybe you’d be more useful in fights if you weren’t so busy staring at me,” Garou goes on.

Badd only raises a very unamused eyebrow at him.  

“I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice,” his ghost insists with that stupid, smug expression of his. He even - wait, was that a bloody wink?

“Urgh, I’m gonna be sick,” Badd tiredly mumbles as he turns around to leave the scene. Now that the fight is over, Garou will soon disappear for the rest of the day. Meanwhile, there’s a piano recital Badd needs to attend.

To be honest, he’s getting used to this whole ghost thing. Garou can handle himself in a fight. Hell, he can even be of some real use, Badd has to give him that.

Such a shame he’s that much of a big mouth. It’s been almost a month now, and his lame pickup lines still exhaust him.

***

When the evening is quiet and the weather is soft, Badd loves to just sit on the wooden stairs behind his house and chill. Zenko often joins him, and they chat, or she just reads a book until it’s time for her to get to bed.

That time was half an hour ago. Now Badd is alone with Tama, purring loudly in his lap as he pets her, and he simply enjoys doing nothing.

He doesn’t really notice the nightfall.

“It’s late,” a familiar voice says in a sugar-coated tone. “Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

Badd tilts his head to find his ghost in his usual sitting position, one elbow casually resting on his knee, a few steps higher.

He recognizes the question for what it actually is: an attempt at starting some small talk. He’s not in the mood, so he shrugs, and suppresses a grimace when the gesture makes his bandaged shoulders sting a bit. Then he shifts to find a more comfortable position and resumes petting Tama without answering.

Garou doesn’t insist. Nice.

They spend a moment like that, in silence, and with the light breeze brushing his washed hair, Badd thinks he could fall asleep right there. The adrenaline of the fight he’s had this afternoon has finally worn off, and he feels tired, but in a good way - it’s a physical weariness, not the nervous tension he’s been used to lately.

After a while, his ghost is talking again, and it would annoy Badd if not for the genuine curiosity in his voice.

“Just wanted to ask, about earlier… How did you do that?”

“What d’ya mean?”

“I saw that monster beat the shit out of you,” Garou says, and he sounds suspicious. “You were out, man. How the fuck did you get up and win after that?”

“Not thanks to you, asshole,” Badd groans, but there isn’t any bite to it. He’s actually smirking a little.

“That kind of brute? Not my style,” his ghost snorts with a disgusted expression. “Besides, I wanted to see how you’d manage without me, and… shit, I still don’t know what I’ve seen.”

Badd doesn’t know what he’s done to make an impression on fucking Killing Machine Garou, but hell if he doesn’t secretly feel very pleased.

“Just some good old fighting spirit,” he replies in a carefully neutral tone.

“Come again?”

“Y’know. When you get all angry at stuff. Makes you go wild.”

“You… were angry,” Garou repeats incredulously.

“Well, duh! Wasn’t gonna let that jackass waste any more of my time,” Badd explains blandly, and he doesn’t get what’s so hard to understand.

He turns to watch Garou, and catches him staring right back, eyes wide in a shocked expression. Then the ghost bursts out laughing, and it startles Badd, because it isn’t one of his damn chuckles: it’s an actual, full-throated laugh.

“What?” he asks, not knowing if he should feel cheerful or offended.

“You’re really something else,” Garou wheezes, theatrically pretending to wipe a tear away. “Man, I wish you’d killed my last host sooner - where were you all this time?!”

“You mean, that tiger level monster back when I met ya?”

“Yep,” Garou nods, sobering up a little. “I’ve been stuck with it for years. Never been so bored in my whole sorry existence. The bastard spent most of its time hiding from humans.”

“Why didn’t you kill it?”

“Because I can’t, obviously. I can touch my hosts, but I’m physically unable to harm them. I thought you’d figured that much out,” Garou explains, and his voice is regaining its teasing tone already.

“So that’s why you still haven’t tried to killed me,” Badd deadpans, feeling a little more up for banter than a moment ago.

“That, and also, who would you talk to if you didn’t have me?”

“Yeah, yeah, let’s pretend I’m not the one who’d kick your ass, why don’t we.”

“SAY WHAT??”

***

Garou doesn’t know exactly where he is during the day, when his host isn’t involved in a fight. Time passes differently, and for the most of it, he isn’t really conscious. It’s like he’s in some kind of stasis. And then, when he’s awake, he’s full of energy in a way humans probably can’t imagine. He wants to talk, to run, to explode and to scream. He wants to exist.

That’s why he likes fighting so much. It makes him feel useful. It makes him feel real. It’s the proof that he can leave his mark on a world he sometimes doubts he’s a part of. He’s had countless years to train, and he’s become strong - strong enough that he’s having a good time whatever the enemy.

But, well, fighting isn’t everything. He’s had dozens of hosts, and he’s never been able to walk too far away from them without slipping into his awkward rest mode again - only to find himself stuck with the same host when he wakes up again. Which always turns up to be incredibly boring. Between humans who mostly sleep at night and monsters who sometimes don’t talk at all, Garou has learnt the hard way that he’s, in fact, a talkative guy. And isn’t that a great thing to be when the only being in the whole universe who can see and hear you is your current host?

Garou has had his fair share of boredom, to say the least.

“Hey, dipshit, you awake?”

That’s why he’s more than happy with his new host.

“When have you seen me sleep before?” Garou replies with a playful smirk, tilting his head towards the voice.

It’s dark, and he’s outside, leaning his shoulder against the external wall of the house, arms crossed onto his chest. Badd is standing a few paces further and is giving him a vaguely annoyed look.

“Haven’t heard what I just said, have ya? We’re goin’ for a walk. Come on.”

“Why, babe, it almost sounds like a date,” Garou teases in his cheesiest tone.

“We’re out of food for Tama,” Badd goes on, unbothered, as if Garou hadn’t spoken at all. Damn, he’s good at ignoring him.

“Guess it can’t be helped,” Garou sighs loudly, trying very hard not to give away how eager he actually is to just… do something. Anything.

“Don’t make that face. We’ll make a lil’ detour by that shitty park - you know the one. Who knows what we might find there, at such an hour?” Badd grins, shifting his grip on his bat, and it seems like he’s eager, too.

Yeah, Garou thinks with an amused expression as he follows Badd into the street, that’s got to be his best host ever. Badd does sleep, of course, but far less than the average human - or, well, much later, so there’s that. He’s a hero, so he’s involved in more battles than Garou can count - and he’s good at fighting, in his own way. Not exactly the fast, calculated fighting Garou is used to, but rather a raw, brutal style, with a strength and a resilience that has forced Garou’s admiration more than once (meaning his host probably won’t die on him anytime soon - not that Garou would let that happen, anyway). Last but not least, Badd is fun to talk to, even if Garou’s constant teasing never seems to pull any reaction out of him - and that’s new, because all his previous hosts had let him get to their nerves so easily, but Badd won’t even acknowledge his little game, which is fun, too.

It’s fun because it allows him to push as far as he wants without risking damaging the balance they have found, and the domesticity of it is making him more relaxed than he’s ever been.

The park is quiet and empty when they get there. Garou tries not to feel frustrated, and fails. He’s glad he can stretch his legs a little, but he really could use some action right now. It’s been days since they last were in a fight.

“Shit, we’ll have to actually buy food for your stupid cat, won’t we,” Garou mutters.

“Don’t call her that,” Badd snaps, looking down at his phone. “But yeah, looks like everything’s fine tonight. Let’s go before the nightshop closes.”

So Badd won’t react to shameless flirting, but he will defend his goddamn cat. Garou smiles as he stores the information for later use, and makes to turn around and leave - except he doesn’t.

He suddenly feels like his whole body is being weighed down. He frowns down at his feet and insists.

He stays perfectly still.

“Well, well,” a smug voice says, “That’s a pretty friend you’ve got here, Metal Bat.”

Garou furrows his brow harder. There’s a man approaching - a random dude, all dressed up in a suit, hands in his pockets. On Garou’s left, Badd moves freely to face the newcomer.

“I dunno what yer talkin’ about,” his host says, sounding only mildly annoyed. “Who the fuck are you?”

“Thomas J. Lambert, at your service,” the guy introduces himself with assurance as he comes to a stop right before Badd. His attitude exhales cockiness and audacity. Garou already hates him.

“Never heard of ya,” Badd casually drops, as unimpressed as he always is. Which seems to suck a little of the fun out of the guy. Oh, he’s really good at this.

“Well, let’s just say that I’m an esper with… very specific abilities,” the douchebag goes on, and he sounds just a tad irritated. “I can feel the aura of your pet from miles away,” he adds, not even bothering to glance in Garou’s direction.

What a prick.

“I can hear you, y’know,” Garou interjects.

“And I can interact with it, too. My power is keeping it paralyzed as we talk,” Thomas Jerk  What’s-His-Name goes on, and he still won’t spare a glance at Garou. Badd does, though.

“Ya better hurry up and spit out what ya wanna say already,” he mutters, expression halfway between nonplussed and upset.

“It’s simple, really. I can rid you of this parasite - in exchange for financial compensation, naturally.”

“Oi! I’m right here,” Garou repeats louder, because he is beginning to lose his patience. He tries against his invisible restraints, without success.

His host is silent for long enough that Garou looks back up at him, and he is stunned to see Badd is grinning slightly.

Like he finds this whole situation funny.

The bastard.

“I’d make you a special price, of course,” Mr Jackass is still saying. “It would be my pleasure to help a S-Class hero out. What do you say?”

There’s a short silence.

Then Badd makes the most self-satisfied, shit-eating smile Garou has ever seen.

“How much would that be, exactly?”

“YOU ABSOLUTE ASSHO-”

“OKAY! Okay! Jesus,” Badd laughs, before turning back to the guy. “Sorry, fella, that’s… kind of you, I guess? but I’m not interested.”

“Are you certain, sir? Just think about it,” the son of a bitch insists. “I’m sure a hero like you could use a little peace at night.”

“Nah, I’m fine, thanks. Let him go, we’re moving,” Badd says as he begins to walk towards the exit of the park - only for the guy to block his way, hands lifted in a soothing attitude.

“What about the next host, then? Surely you wouldn’t willfully condemn someone to wear that burden after you.”

“Someone would hafta kill me first, and it ain’t for so soon.” Badd is probably starting to feel pissed, because he’s articulating every word distinctly, voice low and threatening. “I said I’m not interested. Let. Him. Go.”

The brat suddenly seems hesitant, but the pressure around Garou’s body doesn’t lessen. What is he playing at? No one in their right mind would want to get on Badd’s ner-

“I didn’t want it to come to this,” the walnut says, and his voice doesn’t sound human at all anymore.

Three things happen simultaneously. The force blocking Garou slightly diminishes, allowing him to take a single, difficult step forward. Badd falls down on one knee, as if he is now being crushed. And the suit of the esper tears itself apart, revealing a slender figure with what looks like a second pair of arms.

 A monster.

“Can’t say I was expecting to run into Metal Bat today,” the monster crackles, and its face doesn’t have anything human left either. “But you happen to be linked to a very powerful creature. I need to kill it to absorb its energy.”

“As if,” Garou snarls, taking another heavy step forward, struggling to regain more control over his body. Come on. Come on!

“I can’t have you protecting that thing,” the monster goes on, as if it doesn’t know how to shut the fuck up anymore. “But I don’t mean you any harm. We don’t have to be enemies. I’ll just keep you still while I take care of it.”

From the corner of his eye, Garou sees Badd brace himself on his bat and start to get up, but the monster points a finger at him, and he’s sent back to his knees.

The pressure on Garou loosens up a little more.

That fucker can’t immobilize us both completely, he realizes.

He tentatively straightens himself up and rolls his shoulders. His muscles feel heavy and slow as they strain against the still-there tension, but they obey him. He smirks. I can work with that.

“Your pet is still too weakened to overcome me, any-”

The monster is interrupted as Garou tackles it to the ground.

The close up fight is messy - a bit too much for Garou’s liking. He has to put all his focus on every move he makes, and even like that, he can feel how uncharacteristically slow and weak his attacks are.

“Shit,” he hisses against his better judgement when the monster hits him square in the shoulder. It doesn’t exactly hurt, but it does make him take a step back, and damn, he should have ducked that one.

He knows he should go for the arms. If he could tear one or two off, he’d have more room to use his usual techniques. But the esper knows better than to let Garou get too close, which is infuriating. It constantly jumps just out of reach, and only hits when Garou’s momentum prevents him from reacting in time.

I could use some fucking fighting spirit right now, Garou thinks, and he almost chuckles at the thought. Badd’s style isn’t always the most refined, but in Garou’s position, he’d probably still have enough raw strength to beat the shit out of that motherfucker.

Shame Badd isn’t in Garou’s position. The esper had said it’d concentrate on keeping the hero out of this, which is why Garou can move at all. Big fucking A.

Garou is pulled out of his thoughts as something punches him hard in the stomach, and the hit sends him flying a few feet away. “Dammit,” he swears as he raises to his feet again, reaching to the trail of blood that leaks from his mouth with trembling fingers.

He’s already getting tired.

And the monster only seems to become faster with each passing moment.

Its attacks still aren’t powerful enough to cause any serious injury, but time isn’t playing in Garou’s favor here.

I need to end this, he thinks. The sooner the better. He takes a deep breath and shifts his weight on his feet. He won’t win by his usual ways. He needs to rely less on the speed he currently doesn’t have, and to focus more on the few hits he can land if he wants to -

Right behind him, the monster emits something that might be a giggle, and Garou realizes it’s must closer than he’d thought.

He startles, turns on his heels, puts his guard up and braces himself -

The monster is hit by a metal bat on its side and violently crushes into the trees nearby, leaving greenish, fuming fluids all over the place.

Badd is standing in its place, and his face is maculated in red.

“You’re bleeding,” his host informs him, slightly out of breath.

Garou can’t believe this guy.

“I’m - ?! Dude, your face! What happened?”

“Hit myself,” Badd shrugs, swinging his now red-and-green bat on his shoulder, keeping an eye on the monster’s form where it landed. “To clear my mind of that jerk’s shit.”

“You -”

Garou trails off, because he needs a while to process this. A few paces away, the monster wiggles sluggishly - it isn’t dead yet, as the slight pressure still weighting Garou down should have let him know, and they should go on and finish it now, but he’s too stunned to get a move on.

So instead, he blinks and lets himself slip into more familiar ground as he cracks a flirtatious smile.

“Really? You hit your own head with your fucking bat just to give me a hand?” he grins cockily. “Man, are you that desperate?”

“For you, yes,” Badd states - he doesn’t whisper it, he doesn’t shy away from it, he states it, loud and plain, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

Like it doesn’t make Garou suddenly feel warm all over.

For the first time ever, he doesn’t know what to say.

“Oh, so you’re the biggest bloody flirt there is, but I can’t flirt back?” Badd teases him with an all too knowing grin, before casually walking to the monster and delivering it the final blow.

Garou can feel his invisible restrains vanishing, but he still doesn’t know how to move. Or how to talk, for that matter.

“Come on,” Badd laughs as he shakes his bat to rid it of the monster’s gore. “If we run, we can make it to the nightshop in time to buy Tama’s food.”

“Wait-” Garou yells after him. “Wait, did you actually -”

“Come on!” Badd yells back, tone playful, and he’s already gone.

For a few more seconds, Garou just stands there, arms stupidly hanging at his sides, mind gone completely blank. Then a wide, amused, unbelieving smile spreads on his face, and he chases after Badd.

He’s blushing hard, but he can’t bring himself to care.

Badd cares.

And they have all the time in their intertwined lives to figure things out.

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issue 10

double digits baybe

its roller! he....sexy

well that whole registration deal sure doesn't seem like its a ploy to identify the main forces of the decepticon revolution or anything! 

chromedome using rungs model ships to tell his story...omg

the ironic billboard hvbhjsdkfbjdjgfkl

prowl givin off those rancid bbc sherlock vibes lmao

hrk....prowl and cd have such an interesting and tragic relationship...aughhhh

RED ALERT!!! I forgot he was in the flashback bc his present self is busy being...headless....

OHH SHIT so they uncover the decepticon symbol on the wall using ultraviolet light, and we also get shown the back of red alert’s head, with some mnemosurgery marks...which can only be seen under ultraviolet light. CLEVER

I literally only noticed that this time lmao I don't think I picked up on it even on my 2nd readthru....poor red alert geez, no wonder he’s so untrusting 

poor cyclonus, he literally had nothing to do w/this, meanwhile rodimus is blaming him when the Real reason this happened to red alert is all the overlord business, which we know rodimus’s role in....(well, later)

god I love this entire interaction between cyclonus and drift, I'm so glad we got it. bc like, cyclonus is basically everything drift is trying so hard to be - cool stoic religious sword guy who used to be a bad guy, except cyclonus is still firmly not an autobot, while drift is hardcore leaning into being an autobot in an attempt to get people to forget that whole ‘murderous decepticon’ thing

and drift seems like the type of guy who cares The Most about how he’s perceived by the people around him, but he tries to act like he doesn't care, even tho its pretty obvious he does. cyclonus, meanwhile, ACTUALLY doesn't care about what people think of him, and that probably irritates drift, along w/everything else cyclonus has going on 

cyclonus is so iconic...he just smacks the sword out of drifts hand like ‘yeah we’re not doing this.’ 

aaand then he just pins drift down effortlessly...I feel kinda bad for drift cause he’s trying so hard but also, cyclonus is such an icon

also I love the way milne draws cyclonus. sexy skull guy....

godddd cyclonus’s little speech is so fucking cool...cyclonus is seriously just so cool and epic js

oooh and first aid has that medic droid that was spying on red alert...

prowls never been in a fight oof I forgot abt that

aaand there's orion pax supercop lmao

tailgate being so wow’d by pax’s coolness is adorable 

op sure loves the violence huh bvfjhsdfgbdjhkf

I feel like all of shadowplay just goes to show that sometimes you CANT change the structure of a system from the inside - which is, iirc, what op is trying to do, and the reason he’s still a cop under the senate even though he doesn’t agree with them - but like, sometimes you just gotta burn that shit to the ground and start over, and op clearly doesn't realize that....

oh the irony of prowl saying ‘I hope I never end up as jaded and cynical as you’ to op

oof,, whirl is right...its clear prowl and cd care abt each other a lot, in their own weird awkward way...oof ouch

also poor whirl, jesus, literally everyone seems to blame him for turning megatron violent as if that's all on whirl and not 1) meagtron’s own actions and decisions, and 2) just another example of how fucked up the system was, taking in account whirls whole backstory about how he was forced into being a dirty cop and told to kill megatron but ended up just beating him up....like, if it wasn't whirl it would've been someone else beating up megs, and the shift to violence seemed inevitable given the state of society, whirl’s assault of megs just happened to be the straw that broke the pacifist’s back 

geeez and the fact that whirl saved his 1 phone call to warn pax that the senator was in danger, despite the fact that whirl was also being beat to hell by other prisoners and apparently being denied medical treatment...yikes. also the fact that pax just leaves whirl there (iirc?) after whirl gave them invaluble information

ah, the driving power of wanting revenge. also god I'm sad abt whirl :( when he says he just wants his hands back...fucking ouch

oooh its skids! baby skids!! and a certain somebody next to him....

I love seeing cd and prowl talk about what they think is coming, right before yknow, a 4 million yr long civil war. feels like how talking about 2020 in january/febuary turned out lmao 

they keep saying clampdown and it reminds me too much of quarantine, which I've been stuck in for weeks now bc I have covid, and oh my god who knew sitting inside with nothing to do for like 3 weeks was so boring. jesus. at least in early 2020 quarantine it was warm enough to go outside, mostly...whatever, I'm doing this liveblog to entertain myself while I waste away inside and mtmte slaps so at least this is a good time

anyways, back on track. cd and prowl have their big tragic romance thing going on, and rewind is not into it, understandably

OH SHIT ITS TREPAN i forgot he was in this

also his name is kinda hilarious to me bc ‘trepan’ refers to ‘trepanation,’ which was the old-timey “””””medical””””” act of drilling holes in your skull to like, idk, let out the ghosts or something, you know how medicine was back then, you kinda just made shit up as you went along. anyways, that's a hilariously on-the-nose name for this dude, and makes anyone who recognizes his name go ‘oh hey you’re sketchy as hell,’ a full 3 seconds before trepan acts sketchy as hell in-story to let anyone who doesn't know about obscure historical alternative medicine in on it 

YOU WERE IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING, WERE YOU

lmao this dude rlly tried to act like he had ‘cleanse and control’ tatted bc he was an janitor....bruh

oh hey look its pious maximus, that guy who disappeared months ago after saying some stuff the senate didn't like! well, he certainly doesn't look like he’s having a good time

I'm fascinated by the fact that cd saw this whole state-run brainwashing clinic thing and ended up joining up later

also the fact that prowl saw All That and was like ‘idek if the law is being broken rn tbh’ liiiiike, dude, if the law isn't being broken when there's state-sponsored mass brainwashing going on, don't you think that's a pretty good indicator that the laws in place are pretty bad???? maybe????

ngl the first time I read this I was already pretty confused, and the senator changing his looks off-page Really did not help 

ooh its all comin together...this shit is JUICY 

‘we have to steal the matrix’ I FUCKGIN LOVE IT LMAO NATIONAL TREASURE LOOKIN

so the plot has thickened, like, a lot. and now we’re doin a HEIST! nice

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 245: The Second One

Previously on BnHA: We kicked off day one of New Internships with a fun-filled morning of shenanigans. Highlights included: (1) an old bearded man gallivanting around town telling everyone the world is going to end (and making a surprising amount of sense); (2) Bakugou and Deku attempting to rough up a group of impassioned hobos, only to have their thunder stolen from right underneath their noses; and (3) Hawks, the thunder-stealer himself, who proceeded to be all “what’s up fellas, hey Endeavor did you miss me?” Endeavor, who totally did miss him, pretended like he had not, and meanwhile Hawks introduced himself to Endeavor’s new trainees: Finger-Smashing Kid, Kid Who Used To Work For The Guy You Just Murdered, and Shouto (Just Shouto). Then he pulled out a copy of Re-Destro’s book and was all, “hey Endeavor have you heard of this book which was really important to the plot in the previous arc? I think you should read it, for reasons!!” and Endeavor just kind of stared at him, which wasn’t exactly inspiring. Anyways let’s see if these two idiots can manage to pull this off.

Today on BnHA: Hawks shoves the Liberation Army’s book into Endeavor’s hands while staring at him with the intensity of a thousand suns, and then, to avoid suspicion, proceeds to hand out another 500,000 copies of the book without even being asked. He then flies back to the PLF headquarters and is all “good news gentlemen, I gave out copies of the Army’s book to everyone in Japan!” and they’re all “that’s great, Hawks!” because somehow it turns out that this was actually a good plan. Back at the Endeavor Agency HQ, the kids meet Endeavor’s 30+ other sidekicks, who are all “now let’s all stand around and wait for Endeavor to tell us what to do.” Over in his office, Endeavor shrewdly deduces that Hawks was trying to tell him something, and pieces together the hidden code Hawks left in his book, which basically reads “IN FOUR MONTHS WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE.” Back at the PLF, the League cheerfully discusses their plot to blow up the entire world come Springtime. Which apparently everyone is on board with. So, uh, does anyone else feel like they accidentally fell asleep during a really important part of the movie, because uh. What.

(All comments are my unspoiled reactions from my initial readthrough of the chapter. I did a quick edit for grammar and clarity afterward, and added a few ETAs in the process, but aside from that there are no changes.)

okay so two things: (1) as I mentioned in a previous post, Caleb Cook reported that this chapter took him more than 4 times longer than usual to translate. so like, what does that mean?? guess we’re about to find out!

and (2) HAWKS’S REAL NAME. I started typing up this recap early just so I could liveblog my reaction, since it seems that the databook has leaked, and I figure I’m going to stumble across this sooner rather than later. so I’m just going to look it up now here goes!!

AHHHH TAKAMI KEIGO AHHHH

lol. I have no idea what that actually means. let me look up some more stuff about this

oooh thank you reddit!

ooh damn, I love it!? “hawk” + “vision” lolol HORIKOSHI BACK AT IT AGAIN. but “watchman” is a really nice bonus what with how it relates both to the whole spying biz, and in a more general sense toward what he is trying to do as a hero trying to protect society. plus the name “Keigo” just has a really nice sound to it in general. kind of a boyish, youthful sound. not too hard or soft. idk. I like it. that was my favorite character in Bleach too

also apparently both of the kanji used for “Keigo” mean “enlightenment” oooh. my god I could analyze this all day. this being Thursday night, I’ll have some time to ruminate before I read the chapter tomorrow, so if I have any epiphanies I will add them in later!

(ETA: no additional thoughts on this right now, but there is now a ton of other content out from Ultra Analysis, so let’s take a quick look at some of that!

Haagen Dazs’s gender:  I now feel vindicated in continuing to refer to him as a “he” even after the face reveal! let this be a lesson to everyone never to judge a shounen character solely by how pretty they are. not that it wouldn’t have been nice to have another female villain! anyways the important thing is that I still don’t have his name memorized and never will!

Thirteen’s gender?!: now this, I don’t really like. Thirteen was already in the previous databook IIRC and their gender was ambiguous. which to be frank was awesome. having a canon nonbinary character was sick. why you gotta do this now Horikoshi smdh.

Reason for Shouji’s mask: nooooo poor Shouji. people in quirk society are jerks! lol I get the arms being scary, but his face?? now I really want to see what he looks like though. it would be cool if he became more accepting of himself as a result of hanging with his chill classmates and decided to ditch the mask. anyways my boy needs a hug.

and there’s a lot of other stuff, including a whole series of cute segments showing the characters’ relationships with each other, but I think I’ll save those for another post because otherwise this would get way too off-track. but man, so far I’m really loving this.)

okay kiddos. it is now Friday, and time to take our horse to the hype town road. I have been waiting all fucking week for this shit so it had better not disappoint!

“Rising to Action” ooh, nice. guess this is not much of a “sit still” gang, here

okay so we’re picking off right where we left off, and guys, I just need to know, does anyone other than me find this kind of hilarious

like, I don’t know why but just. Endeavor’s face. omg. he just looks like he’s trying so hard to figure out what’s wrong. I think what it is is that this is the exact same bemused/perplexed expression that Shouto gets on his face all the freaking time, and it just tickles me to no end that the apple apparently doesn’t fall far from the tree. ahh Shouto I know you don’t want to hear this but damn boy you look like your dad

anyways. I think we can all agree Endeavor should not be looking this adorable and what the hell. let’s move on

LOOOOOOL

why is this so funny ahhhhhhh. they’re so fucking serious please stop. I mean, but of course they’re serious, though. the weird one is me, right? whatever!

so now here’s the handoff. between these two super-serious dudes

Endeavor you had better not do like me and be all “of course I’ll read it!” fully intending to follow through (really!) but then you never do and everyone is super disappointed and you start to read something else instead, all the while feeling incredible guilt! my point is, Endeavor, I hope you don’t have ADHD or we’re all fucking screwed omg

lol though thankfully we have a backup!

“oh boy!” clamors Deku, a gleam of excitement in his eye. “homework!”

OH MY GOD

WHO ARE YOU, OPRAH

ff now he’s just SLAPPING THEM INTO THEIR HANDS omg. this is amazing

love how Katsuki is keeping an extra 1.5 meters of space in between him and the others because cooties. or something

anyways! I really want them all to read it actually so this is awesome! KACCHAN YOU ESPECIALLY. I want you to read it and then give it a disgusted 1 star review on goodreads. show me how much you’ve grown kiddo

lmaooo

Todoroki Shouto. god’s perfect idiot. bless this child. someone explained Occam’s razor to him one day, and he just sat there nodding like “yes that makes perfect sense” and proceeded to apply it to every fucking thing in his life from there on out. “what’s Hawks doing carrying around 10,000 copies of The Book of PLF and just handing them out to strangers like an old lady on Halloween? processing... processing... oh I see, he probably just REALLY LIKES THE BOOK how keen”

this is what Hawks is up against. this squad of certified morons with two whole brain cells shared among them on a good day. boy literally brought three backup secret messages just in case Endeavor was too dense to figure this out, only to watch these kids exclaim, with perfect sincerity, “GOSH, HAWKS MUST REALLY LIKE THIS BOOK, HUH”

and meanwhile the best Endeavor can do is “............something.......... feels.... off.......” fml. we’re all gonna die. Hawks, I’m sorry. you tried!! next time give Momo your secret message instead!

so now he says that he’s actually recommending this book to all of his acquaintances omg. don’t tell me this handsome canary is actually going around handing out books to every single person he knows?? all to cover up this one action of giving Endeavor the book with the secret message highlighted in it?? okay guys help me decide: is this brilliance or stupidity? like, what is even going on inside Hawks’s head. “I’ll just fly around handing out copies of Atlas Fucking Shrugged to everyone I meet. that’ll seem really natural”

I s2g Endeavor if you don’t follow up on this...! THE WORLD IS COUNTING ON YOU YOU BIG MEATHEAD. GET TO READIN’. MAKE LEVAR PROUD

and now Hawks is flying away with his hands in his pockets

godspeed you dramatically casual bastard

now Deku is all “you know, he’s not much older than us, but he really seems like he’s got his shit together!” which, yeah. don’t you hate that? the truth is though it’s all an act, and he’s actually just as screwed up as the rest of you! the moral is: never trust any 22-year-old who seems like they’ve got their shit together. because, no. he sits on a throne of lies

Endeavor are you actually being thoughtful??!

oh my god. we may actually have a chance here. praise be

now we are cutting to the Endeavor agency! guys, fucking look at this fucking ‘E’, though

ngl that shit is dope. I’m mad. I would buy his merch just for the logo and I hate that about myself

holy shit

the... flaming hot... oh my god

holy shit there’s so many of them

(ETA: hold up -- “Bakugou” and “Shouto”? this is a crucial detail here; they’re using Bakugou’s last name, but Shouto’s given name. so either they’re calling him Shouto because they know his pop, or -- more likely -- they’re calling him “Shouto” because that’s his hero name. in which case, “Bakugou” most likely also refers to “Bakugou” as in the hero name, not his actual name. meaning that still is his hero name. meaning he is still undecided. fucking... Katsuki. honey. why.

ffff and the new databook seems to support this too. instead of a hero name, Horikoshi just wrote “XXX” indicating he still hasn’t made up his mind. welp. looks like it’s back on that slow burn character development train, folks. maybe by the end of this arc, though? please? Horikoshi? Horikoshi damn it look at me.)

so this is how the number one operates, huh. meanwhile All Might only ever had one sidekick, and reluctantly at that. he really was so far out ahead of everyone else that he was basically untouchable. crazy

anyways, yes! they don’t know anything about anything so please teach them!

good grief this girl says Endeavor has over thirty sidekicks?? lmao and her name is “Burnin’.” please tell me the missing g is an actual part of her name please I need this

wow, Burnin’ really went and tried to pick a fight with my famously hot-tempered son knowing full well what his personality is like. and just look at him keeping his cool and firing back though

oh, Katsuki. [hair ruffle] he will thrive here

damn these guys are passionate

Endeavor seriously picked these people as his sidekicks? that Endeavor? they didn’t annoy the shit out of him?? that man is an enigma

btw can we all just stop here for a moment and give a shoutout to this horse-looking dude because. look at him. amazing. new fave

anyway so now the mummy-looking guy is explaining how they organize their shift schedule

so professional. this really is the big leagues

yoooooo my boy is FIRED UP. READY TO SAVE SOME BITCHES! YESSSSS WIN AND RESCUE LET’S DO THIS

LET’S FUCKING GOOOO omg I love him so much. Kacchan you need to cool it or I’m going to spend this whole fucking chapter ruffling your hair

(ETA: incidentally, here’s something I neglected to point out earlier: in spite of being a belligerent asshole in general, Katsuki for the most part is actually surprisingly respectful to most adults, especially heroes. so it’s interesting then that so far, this doesn’t seem to apply to Hawks. he almost seems to consider him another rival rather than another mentor/teacher-type figure to learn from. I wonder if this is because -- as Deku pointed out earlier this chapter -- Hawks is much closer to them in age than the other heroes. it’s interesting that that was pointed out -- and that in the very next panel Katsuki was grumbling about how Hawks pisses him off, at that.

anyway. this BakuHawks rivalry seems to be an established thing now, so I’m very curious to see how this develops.)

lol now Mummy Guy is all “that’s great! now we just need to wait for Endeavor to tell us what to do!” and Kacchan is like “WHAT”

I mean, he’s got a point lol. “we’re so busy!” “great let’s get to work!” “actually we don’t have any work yet!” like, what a fucking tease. don’t worry Kacchan, they’re just waiting to make sure they assign you boys a job that’s plot-related so we don’t waste any time

ahhh, and now we finally come to the moment we’ve all been waiting for! the part that apparently took four hours to translate! ENDEAVOR READING A BOOK

yeah he was acting like he had a freaking gun to his head. why don’t heroes have secret code phrases they can use to let each other know some weird fucking shit is up? or maybe they do, but since he’s being recorded and since PLF has some heroes on roster who probably know those same codes (looking at you, Slidin’), Hawks didn’t want to risk one of them figuring it out. that makes sense

ahhh, here we go

don’t tell me Caleb tried to translate this whole thing. though I gotta admit I am hella curious

anyway. so the rest of this page is Endeavor metaing about Hawks, and it’s some good stuff, ngl

he really is fond of him, huh. look at all those pictures. how many mental snapshots did you take of this kid smiling?? he’s so adopted it hurts

and look at the concern in that last panel! “why is he acting so weird, that’s not like him, I’ve got to get to the bottom of this.” damn, Hawks really did put his trust in the exact right person and it’s paying off

ENDEAVOR STOP MAKING THESE SOFT WORRIED FACES ABOUT HAWKS RIGHT THIS INSTANT I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THESE FEELS

god damn!! I don’t know why, but I continue to be surprised and impressed at how the character development of Endeavor is actually a subscribe and save deal and not just a one-time purchase. fucking look at Todoroki Enji, proud annual recipient of a different “world’s worst dad” mug every Father’s Day, actually caring enough about another human being to notice the subtle changes in his behavior and realize something is wrong. bruh. good for you!! human compassion is a damn good look for you, negl. fucking growth right here and I’m here for it

anyways, on to the hidden code!

and here are all of the highlighted portions for your code-breaking pleasure

fucking feel like I’m reading Detective Conan right now. yeesh

oooh!

BINGPOT LOOOOOL WHY DID I GET SO EXCITED OKAY LET ME GO BACK AND READ!

“the” “enemy” “liberation” “army” ahhhhhh! HAWKS YOU SNEAKY SON OF A BITCH. GOOD JOB ENDEAVOR!

and now we’re cutting back to Hawks, nooooo I wanted to see Endeavor’s reaction! come on!

lmao although it’s worth it to see Hawks mentally roasting Endeavor exactly like I was mere pages ago omg

his fucking face omg. that’s right Hawks, he’s not the brightest crayon in the box. not the sharpest tack in the bulletin board. he’s a few fries short of a happy meal. the elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor

but give him some credit, though! because he did figure it out! not necessarily because he was clever, but because he knows you!

oh shit lol

OH SO YOU PLANNED THAT PART TOO. WELL OKAY THEN

goddamn. he really is a clever bastard. and okay but in all seriousness, I fucking love that he has enough faith in this weird connection between them that out of all the ploys he could have gone with, this is what he chose. he seriously put all his eggs in the “Endeavor will figure it out from my face” basket. and it fucking paid off. this is awesome

AHHHHHHHHHHHH HERE WE GO

LOOK AT HIS EYE OH MY GOD. YOU CAN SEE THE EXACT MOMENT WHEN HE REALIZES HOW SCREWED THEY ALL ARE, YES, FUCK, THIS IS WHAT I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR OH GOD

and we’re cutting back to Hawks again! I’ll just assume the rest of his message went something like “we” “are” “boned” and Endeavor’s face was like :o

BACK AT THE OL’ VILLAIN HOTEL!!!

LOL WHAT IS THIS

THEY HAVE A FUCKING COUNCIL NOW

whose seat is that over on the left? Hawks’s? is Gigantomachia actually wearing a shirt?? AND SHOW US TOMURA’S FACE HORIKOSHI YOU COWARD

lmao oh my god are they really buying this shit

look at him. so trustworthy. nothing to suspect over here! just a 100% sincere born-again villain committed to the cause!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NOOOOOO MY BABIES ARE EXPOSED. HORIKOSHI YOU BETTER PROTECT THEM I SWEAR TO GOD!!!

wow is the whole conversation just shifting over to the topic of Deku now, seriously?

oh my god oh my god oh my god. like. it’s been so long since the forest lodge and Kamino that I almost forgot that the League already knows these kids. they did fight Deku and Shouto briefly in the woods, and then they had an extended fight against Katsuki later on, although Dabi was unconscious for that part. anyways, shit. just like that they’re on their radar again I’m getting chills omgggg

(ETA: at least they’re underestimating them, though. “looks like he hasn’t gotten much stronger.” boy have you not heard about his bloop? that bloop will fuck you up just you wait!)

so now have some weird panels of Hawks walking through a door

(ETA: ohhhh you can see the door closing on the tip of his wing close-up! sneaky!)

ooh! wtf are you serious he can use his feathers to eavesdrop?!

(ETA: it only just clicked on my second read-through that Spinner of all people appears to be the mastermind behind this plan? like, am I reading this right? is he Tomura’s second-in-command now or what? damn, boy, good for you.)

okay, question. if he could do this the entire time, why did they even need him to pretend to join the League at all? I guess you never know when having a man on the inside who can possibly influence their decision-making will come in handy. but still, it seems to me like he could have easily done the spying bit without ever having to join up. ehhh but I guess there’s probably a range limit, and too much risk of the feathers getting caught and destroyed... eh, fine. I’ll allow it

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT EXCUSE ME WHAT?????

AND OF COURSE THAT’S THE END OF THE CHAPTER, LOL, FUCK. EXCUSE ME WHILE I GO STAND IN A CORNER AND SCREAM

lol “danger lurks” fucking you think?? what the hell! so they have an actual plan already, with the details outlined to the extent that they actually have a freaking timetable and everything? and the Liberation Army is on board with this whole thing too? the “destroying everything” part and all? this is too much to process all at once fuck me I can’t

okay! so four months from now is also when the kids will enter their second year! so that means Shinsou can get in on this action too. I’m trying to think of other significant plot things this could potentially imply, but none are coming to mind right now, other than it’ll be the anniversary of USJ. but that’s basically it. -- oh, wait, this also means that there’ll be a new first-year class of students at U.A. too! so that could be interesting. some potential new characters, and a chance for Deku and the others to be senpais. incidentally, to the best of my knowledge the kids will all stay in the same class and Aizawa will continue to be their homeroom teacher in year two. so nothing will change really aside from them becoming 2-A rather than 1-A. and Shinsou joining them, as mentioned. omg

anyway! let me see, any other stray thoughts before I wrap this up? I guess it’s worth noting that Toga’s eye is fine. the League has healed up pretty nicely in general actually. like, that’s seriously impressive for a group that doesn’t have Recovery Girl on staff. how long has it even been since Deika? a few weeks? this is almost ridiculous

and the “boom” -- is that literal? like they’re actually planning to blow everything up? or is that a metaphorical boom. fucking what kind of plan did they come up with where they actually think they can destroy THE ENTIRETY OF JAPAN all at once? is there a doomsday device?? what exactly is this “power” they’re talking about? HAWKS WHY DIDN’T YOU PUT THAT IN YOUR STUPID MESSAGE YOU BOOB

hahaha. anyways. it came down to the last two pages, but that certainly was a reveal worthy of all the hype. to sum: yikes

[numba99]

Fatal Attraction Part 4

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Summary:  When a mysterious man shows up at your job, you find yourself inexplicably drawn to him - and him to you. But behind the beautiful face is the dark lifestyle of a man who has made his wealth through becoming the most powerful drug dealer in the city. Word count: 3.7k 

Song: Loft Music // The Weeknd 

Warning: this part may kinda intense? idk??  some physical fighting and some light smut

When you woke up, your bed was empty. For a split second you thought you dreamt everything from the night before, however, the noises coming from the kitchen told you it had to have been real. You crept out of bed, stepping over Mika’s clothes, which you were happy to see were still on the floor.

You found him at the stove, his back to you as he was cooking up breakfast. You slid your arms around him from behind, on your tip toes so you could rest your head on his shoulder. “Morning,” you murmured into him.

“Morning,” Mika replied, snuggling his head against yours. He stirred some eggs in a frying pan, while you just clung to him, not wanting to let go. “I have to say, your food supply is severely lacking. It’s a miracle I could get this together.”

You rolled your eyes, playfully pushing him, “Give me a break I missed my grocery shopping day this week.” You were a little preoccupied with figuring out if Mika had ghosted you or gotten himself killed, but you thought it was best not to make him feel bad by saying that.

You sat down at the tiny table you use as a kitchen table while Mika plated the eggs. You were pretty sure this table was supposed to be a beside table, but it managed to fit two plates so it didn’t really matter. Mika sat in the creaky little chair across from you and you couldn't help but smile. It was weird, seeing him here with you like this. It almost felt out of place and yet, you couldn’t imagine ever eating there alone again.

“Damn these are good,” you said as you swallowed a forkful. You thought the scrambled eggs you made were good, but these were fancy brunch restaurant level. “Successful, good looking, and you can cook? You really might be the Prince Charming I’ve been dreaming of,” you teased.

“Was your Prince Charming also a drug dealer?” Mika asked, a smile playing at his lips. 

“He wasn’t a dealer, he was the head of an empire,” you threw his words back at him. Mika laughed, continuing to poke at the food with his fork. You didn’t miss the blush that came up to his cheeks, though.

“So I’ve been thinking,” Mika began as he finished up, “If we’re gonna do this, I don’t want there to be secrets between the two of us. I want you to know what’s going on.”

You nodded, “I think that sounds really smart.” You didn’t do well with secrets in normal circumstances, but with something like this it would be a lot more difficult. Plus, it made you feel good the Mika was trusting you this much.

“I’ve got a meeting later with some people who work for me. I’d like you to come, if you’re up for it. I get it though if it’s too overwh-”

“I’d love to be there,” you cut him off. You were already kicking around outfit ideas in your head. If you were gonna be a drug lord’s First Lady, you would need to dress the part. 

“There’s one other thing,” Mika said, taking a long sip of his coffee.

“What’s that?” you asked.

“I’d like you to move in with me.” You choked on your drink, having to cover your mouth to not spray it all over the place. “Don’t act too excited,” he chuckled.

“What happened to taking things slow?” you asked when you finally caught your breath. Not that the idea of moving in with Mika totally turned your off, it just seemed like a complete 180 from last night.

“I know it sounds like a lot,” Mika replied, “I just like the idea of keeping you close to me, so I can make sure you’re safe. You could have your own room, I don’t mind giving you space for yourself.”

 It was a tempting offer, but part of you were attached to your shitty little apartment. It was one of the few things that were your own. You worked really hard for it, and it would be weird to give it up. “Can I think about it?” you asked.

“Of course,” Mika gave your hand a squeeze, “In the mean time I probably should get back to my place and change into new clothes.”

“Can I come? I mean, I probably should be scoping out the place that could be my new home,” you replied, giddy to see where he lived. You could only imagine how nice it would be with he resources he had.

“You should definitely come. And maybe bring an overnight bag? The meeting might end late... and I selfishly want you to sleep over,” Mika replied.

You leaned over the table, pressing a kiss to his lips. “I’ll be ready to go in ten minutes.” You went off to your room, digging out a duffle bag from your closet and filling it with whatever you thought you would need. It was probably a bit much for staying just one night, but you wanted to be prepared. 

“I said a night, not a week,” Mika teased, leaning against your front door.

“Says the dude who asked me to move in with him after dating for like 16 hours,” you shot back.

“Touché. You ready?” You nodded, following him out the door. His driver was waiting for the two of you already. You weren’t self conscious about getting too close to Mika anymore, curling right up to him in the backseat. He lazily ran his hand up and down your side, staring out the window.

“What are you thinking about?” you asked, looking up at him.

Mika, smiled looking down, “You.”

You made a fake gagging noise, “Way too cheesy. What are you really thinking about?”

“I was being serious,” Mika chuckled, “I’m thinking about how good you’ll look next to me tonight.” His kissed your forehead, returning his attention to the world outside the window. Even if it was cheesy, it made you blush. You never thought you would be so excited to sit in on a meeting with a bunch of drug dealers.

The car eventually stopped and you got out to find a glass high-rise towering over you. “This is where you live?” you asked incredulously. Sure, you have seen these buildings before, it was hard to ignore these giant, glittering structures that dotted the skyline, but you never really thought about the people who lived there. It seemed impossible, you couldn’t fathom someone living so luxuriously. Not to mention how insane the rent must be.

“Eh, it’s nicer on the outside,” Mika winked. He took your hand and led your inside. The lobby was like a hotel and everyone inside was either dripping in money or taking care of the people dripping in money. A far cry from the creepy old men that sit in first floor of your apartment building to stare at the young girls walking by.

In the elevator, Mika punched in a code on the keypad, which you eyed in confusion. “It’s to get up to my place,” he explained noting the look on your face, “It’s a security code so no one else can get to my floor. Most penthouses have.” Right, like it’s that casual to have a penthouse in New York City.

The elevator kept going up and up, and you wondered if it would ever stop. You guessed you were at the top floor when the ding sounded and the doors slid open.

“Holy shit,” you gasped, stepping into the apartment. Apartment didn’t even feel like the right word, it really was like mansion that happened to be on top of one of the tallest buildings in the city. Everything was sleek and sexy, much like the man standing beside you. The windows were floor to ceiling, allowing natural light to spill into the sprawling rooms making everything seem that much bigger. You walked forward, taking it all in: the luxurious furniture, the private balcony, the fucking second floor in the apartment. Who the hell in Manhattan has a place with two floors?

“This is amazing,” you breathed, looking down at the city. It felt so impossibly small from up here. “God you must of thought my place was a fucking dump.”

“Not at all,” Mika shook his head, “I’m just glad you like it here.” Mika wrapped his arms around you and kissed your cheek.

“Like it? This... this is like a dream. I can’t even believe it,” you replied. This was making the whole “I wanna stay independent in my own place” thing seemed stupid now.

“Let me show you around,” Mika said and you followed eagerly. Everything seemed more impressive than the room before. The living room had a real wood burning fireplace etched into the marble mantle. His bathroom had a shower and a separate tub, which was positioned right next to a window. That surely gave you some ideas. Up the stairs was his bedroom, which easily fit a king-sized bed. You thought his bedroom was probably bigger than your entire apartment. And his closet looked like a luxury boutique.

“Mika, this is amazing,” you said when he finally led you back down to the main floor. 

“Have I convinced you to move in with me yet?” He smirked, holding you close to him.

“You’re much closer than you were this morning,” you replied. That made him smile brightly. Mika told you to make yourself at home while he made some calls, which was very easy to do. You headed to the kitchen for a snack and now understand Mika’s comments about yours. He basically had a fully stocked food store at his disposal.

After that you wandered around the house a bit. Though Mika gave you a tour, the place was so big there was still so much to discover. Mika found you a while later, marveling again at the spacious bathroom.

“You can use that later, if you’d like,” Mika said as he watched you run your hands over the tub’s edge.

“Seems too big to be in alone,” you heard yourself say. You really need a lesson in taking things slow, you thought to yourself.

Mika laughed though, replying, “I’ve always thought that too.” Mika then let you know you'd be heading out soon, so he set you up in a guest room to get ready. You dug through your duffle bag, trying to put something together from all the clothes you stuffed in there. What does one wear to one of these kinds of things? You certainly didn’t know. 

Eventually you decided on a little black skirt and a silky top that showed off your chest perfectly. Not exactly what you’d wear to a professional business meeting, but you felt like it fit the occasion.

“Wow,” Mika said, watching you descend the stairs. He took you by the hand, spinning you around, “Maybe you shouldn’t come tonight. I need everyone focused and you are one hell of a distraction.”

“Oh please,” you rolled your eyes, pretending like his comment didn’t make you smitten.

Before Mika could reply, Chris came in. “Ready to go when you are,” he announced. Mika thanked him, lacing his fingers through yours and leading you back to the elevator. 

“So there are some things we should go over,” Mika said as you both settled in to the car, “There are going to be some people with big guns there tonight. It’s a security thing, I don’t want you to freak out.”

“Mika, I’ve walked through Penn Station, I’ve seen big guys with big guns I’ll be fine,” you replied. 

“Okay, okay,” Mika replied, “But I don’t want you to leave my side, okay? Everyone there are part of my closest circle, and trust them, but still I can never be too careful. Especially when it come to you.” 

“Is there anyone you trust completely?” you asked.

“Chris,” he responded simply.

“You hear that Chris, you’re the chosen one,” you called up to Chris, who was in his usual spot in the passenger seat.

He turned around, giving you the first smile you think you’ve ever seen from him. “Lucky me,” he replied, before turning back around. Mika told you it would take a little while to get there. Not that it was that far, but they loop around and take back ways to ensure they aren’t being followed. You hadn’t ever really been scared to be with Mika, but it suddenly dawned on you that this was real. You weren’t in some crazy movie, this was all really happening to you.

You had some time to think about how fucking crazy your life is before you finally arrived. The outside didn’t look like much. If you didn’t know any better, you would have thought it was just a run down abandoned warehouse, but you guessed that was the point.

Mika’s arm was wrapped tightly around you as walked inside. After a short walk down a dimly lit hallway, you came to a door way guarded by two of the infamous men with big guns. They let you, Mika, and Chris pass without a word. Behind the doors was a dark, windowless room with a long table populated with 4 men, as well as a couple of other armed guards standing at attention. At the head of the table was an empty chair, the biggest in the room, looking more like a throne. You knew who that was for.

“Now I know why you were late,” one of the men - a blond, who looked fairly young - smirked.

“Relax, Lias,” Mika replied as you walked you to the head of the table. Lias settled back in his seat, but his eyes were still on you. You felt self conscious, realizing as you sat beside Mika that the were all staring at you.

“Who’s this?” asked a well-dressed man, who's looks rivaled Mika’s.

“This is y/n, we’re dating,” Mika replied.

“God finally. You’ve been so uptight lately, I was hoping you’d get laid soon,” a different man piped up, making you blush.

“Mats, please,” Mika replied sternly.

“So we just bring random girls here now? How do we know she’s not working for Dimitri?” the well-dressed cut in.

“I agree with the Henrik, this doesn’t seem smart,” Lias added, “Even if she is hot.”

“Would you all shut up,” Mika snapped, “Do you really think I’m that stupid? To bring someone here I don’t trust?” All of the men shrunk in their seats, shaking their heads. “You all seem to forget who’s in charge here sometimes.”

“Sorry boss,” Mats replied, “It’s nice to meet you, y/n. Happy to have you here.”

“Thanks,” you replied awkwardly, “It’s nice to meet all of you.” The rest of them mumbled greetings back to you. 

“Can we get to business, or do you guys wanna bitch some more?” Mika asked, scanning the men that sat before him. No one contested, so they got to business. You tried to pay attention the best you could; it was a bit of an out of body experience at first. You learned the last man’s name was Jesper, and that each of them were responsible for overseeing different areas of Mika’s coke trade in the city.Right now they were discussing a huge shipment Mika had coming in, one they were sure Dimitri was going to try to sabotage if he found out the details of it.

It was hard for you to focus on this details, however, as you watched Mika at work. He always exuded a strong energy, but the way these men looked at him, followed all of his words without question, the power he had was arousing. Not to mention, he kept his hand on your inner thigh rubbing little circles over the delicate skin, which definitely not helping the stirring between your legs.

“So we all know what are roles are when the shipment comes?” Mika asked. Everyone nodded and Mika continued, “Alright, we’re good here then. You’re free to go.”

The atmosphere broke in the room after that, feeling a lot more like some friends hanging out than a much of guys planning to smuggle millions of dollars of coke into the city. It was comical how swift the shift was.

“Sorry about before,” Henrik said to you, “Can't be too cautious in our line of work, but if Mika trusts you, you’re family.” You smiled as he pulled you in for a hug.

“For the record, I never questioned you,” Mats jumped. You didn’t miss how his eyes scanned your body. Neither did Mika, apparently.

“Alright, back up,” he said, half kidding. He wrapped his arms around you, kissing your cheek as if to mark what was his, if it wasn’t already obvious. “If you guys are done drooling, there’s actually something I have for y/n.” They nodded, listening to Mika as always and heading out of the room with a final goodbye.

“What do you have?” you asked Mika when you were alone... well alone with Chris and two guards.

“It would be better to show you,” He nodded to Chris, who whispered something in one of the guards ears. Both of of them disappeared out of the room. “If it’s too much just tell me.”

“What are you- oh my god,” you felt like the air was sucked out of you as the guard returned, dragging in none other than Thomas Holmes. He was more haggard looking than when you last saw him at the trial, but you would never forget his face.

Mika put his hands on your shoulder, whispering in your ear, “I thought you deserved to have some justice of your own.” The two guards held him firmly on his knees before you. You walked forward slowly, seeing him shake with fear as you got closer. You wondered if that was the same fear he saw on your parents face the night they were killed.

And then you snapped. In a fit of rage you blacked out, pounding away at him as half screams half cries left your throat. It was like all the anger, fear, pain, everything you felt since the day your parents died was flooding out of you. You kept going until you got it all out, then backed up, practically stumbling into Mika’s arms.

He held you tightly, letting cry out the last few tears you had, before wiping them off your cheeks. “You okay baby?” he asked, to which you nodded. He hugged you again, saying to the guards, “Take him out back and finish him off. Hide his body where no one will find it.” 

“No please! Please don’t I’m sorry!” Thomas screamed as the guards began to drag him away.

“Wait!” you stopped them. The guards looked to Mika, awaiting instruction from him.

“You answer to her tonight,” Mika told them firmly. The guards wordlessly brought him back over to you.

“I don’t want him dead,” you said.

“Oh bless you, thank you, thank y-”

“Not so fast,” you cut him off, crouching down to look him in the eye, “I don’t want you dead today. My mind may change tomorrow, next month, maybe even next year. And if I do, you better believe you will end up dead. You’ll never really be safe for the rest of your life. As long as you live you’ll be looking over your shoulder, praying I haven’t changed my mind.” You saw the fear in his eyes and you weirdly liked it. It made you feel powerful, and it wasn’t like he didn’t deserve this. 

You told the guards to get him out of your face, before turning back to Mika, who was looking at you stunned. “Would it be wrong to say I thought that was hot,” Mika said.

“Only if it was wrong that I enjoyed it,” you replied. Maybe enjoyed wasn't exactly the right word. It was intensely emotional, but it also felt like such a weight off your chest. You had stored so much hatred and fear in your body because of that man for years now it was all out. You felt ten pounds lighter.

Mika smiled hungrily at you, “Lets go home, yeah?” You nodded taking his hand and heading out. The ride felt quicker, though you took just as many turns and back ways as you did when you came. Maybe it was because your mind was elsewhere, processing everything that took place in these last few hours.

Once back inside Mika’s place, you found yourself walking over to the wall of windows. It was the same view from this morning, of course, but at night with all the lights glimmering below you it was totally different. It was being in like another world.

“You sure you’re okay? I know that must have been... emotional for you,” Mika asked carefully. He slipped his arms around your from behind, kissing your cheek.

“Yeah, it felt good. Like a relief. I just can’t believe you did that for me,” you replied.

“I would do anything for you,” Mika said seriously, his hand squeezing your hips softly. His lips found your neck, peppering kisses over your skin. “I don’t think you realize the power you have.”

“Mmm, and what power is that?” you asked, tilting your head back so Mika had more room to kiss you.

“You could give me a name, any name in this city, and in 24 hours I’d have them in front of you and they’d be at your mercy,” Mika told you between kisses. His hand slipped under your skirt, rubbing you through your underwear. “See this city honey? I run this whole fucking place, and it’s all yours now too. It’s ours.” HIs hand went down the front of your underwear, making your gasp. You hadn’t expected the contact, but you were grateful for it.

“Mika,” you moaned softly. One of your hands pressed against the glass as he ran his fingers through your wetness. He alternated be long, purposeful pumps of his fingers and rubbing circles over your clit. Your free hand reached back and tangled into his hair. You’ve never had a man make you feel so good so fast, and it wasn’t long before he worked you up so much you were cumming all over his fingers. “Fuck,” you whined when you finished, your knees buckled beneath you.

Mika peppered a few more kisses on you before scooping you up. “Let’s get you to bed sweetheart,” Mika murmured, walking with you in his arms. You fell asleep before he even got you to the bedroom.