#going back because my mom used to go around forcing me to lift my shirt up in front of strangers

[boomalope-pope]

Hey guys, have you noticed how a lot of your personal issues relate back to how your parents treated you as a child, that's fucked up

[rinhaler]

so my ex just used me to get better and then dated someone else once he was okay, so i’m requesting a toji fucking megumi’s ex gf to teach his son a lesson, or megumi’s gf ends up taking “Break my heart? i’ll be your step mom.” too seriously 🫶

fuck ur ex fuck him i hate him idek know him but i hate him!!!! enjoy the filth <3

warnings: 18+ MDNI, age gap, implied cheating, vaginal sex, revenge sex, clit rubbing, pet names, praise, slight cucking, creampie.

words: .8k

“Oh. God, T-Toji—!” you cry out as his cock buries deeper and deeper inside of you.

The prominent veins stimulate your walls with every thrust while his cockhead pummels against your g-spot with perfect precision. He doesn’t miss a beat, either, he possesses an endless supply of stamina and he’s using it to his advantage.

He silences you with a nasty, drool infused kiss as your tongues tangle effortlessly. It’s hard to feel guilty about letting your ex’s dad rail you when it feels this good. It was a messy breakup, and yet, you didn’t feel the need to cut off Toji. You broke up with Megumi, after all. Not his dad.

Though you didn’t expect to be lifted onto his chest of drawers when you came over and fucked within an inch of your life. You decided to come over and collect the last of your things and ended up staying a little longer than planned when Toji offered you a glass of wine. In hindsight, you’ve realised that he offered and spilled it on you just to get you upstairs.

“Kid’s a fuckin’ idiot,” he snarls, resting his forehead against yours. “Perfect little pussy, baby, so fucking perfect.”

You watch him as he pulls his head away from yours and licks his thumb, lowering it to rub your puffy clit without slowing his thrusts. Your head falls back against the wall behind you, feeling lighter than air and losing all sense of control as he fucks into you slow and deep.

He smiles at you as you place your hands on his shoulders, moving his lips to softly kiss each of them.

“Knew he’d fuck things up eventually,” he announces, confidently, “The minute I saw ya, I knew Megumi wasn’t gonna be able to handle you, darlin’.”

“Fuck, Toji, h-have you been waiting for this?” you ask him, already knowing the answer by the way he smirks.

“You think too much.” he tells you, leaning forwards to make out with you again. He’s right, of course, but the harder he ploughs into you the muddier your thoughts become. All you can think about is him. There’s inklings of regret as Megumi flashes through your mind. He sees it behind your eyes, he must do. Because soon after he grabs your face in one large hand until your cheeks pucker. “Stop thinkin’ about the piece of shit, he’s not thinking about you.”

“Oh my God…” you huff, knowing he’s right. You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer again, moaning into his mouth as your walls begin to tighten. “Make me— wanna cum—” you tell him, earning another passion induced kiss and faster thrusts.

“Yeah? Wanna cum, baby?” he asks, and you nod in turn. “Can I cum in this pretty cunt?”

“P-Please, yes please!”

The moaning from both of you is raucous as he chases his own high and forces you into yours. You cream around him beautifully. He still can’t believe what an idiot Megumi was to let you go. But he won’t complain, not when he’s emptying his balls into your gorgeous little pussy.

You pant and move the hair out of his face being stuck down by his sweaty forehead. He laughs, softly, and you can’t help but join him when the reality sinks in. Though he helps you down and picks up your underwear from the floor. He grabs his shirt while you slip into them, feeling particularly vile when you feel his warm seed seep into the gusset of your panties.

He watches you as you pick up your jacket and your phone.

“You’re on your phone already?” he laughs. “Don’t tell me I was just a cheap fuck.” he teases you, and you smile.

“No, sorry.” you smile back as you let the intrusive thoughts whirring through your mind win. You were going to delete his number, though you’re glad you didn’t as you hit dial on Megumi’s number. You’re pleased Toji doesn’t hear the faint ringing sound, and you’re even happier when you see the time going up on your screen, seeing that Megumi actually answered.

“hello?” you hear him say a few times, muffling the sound as you put it in your jacket pocket.

“I can’t believe we had sex, Toji.” you speak, doing all you can to not smirk as you’re sure Megumi’s heart just dropped. “You won’t tell Megumi, will you? I’m so mad at him… I hate him… but I don’t want to hurt him.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not telling him.” Toji nods, agreeing. “Can’t lie though, I wouldn’t mind fucking you again.” he chuckles.

“Then…” you approach him again, kissing him. “Fuck me again, Toji. Wan’ your cock again. Want you t’cum in me again. Need you… s’bad.” you moan quietly as his hands begin exploring your body. He lifts you up and throws you down onto the bed, pulling his jeans down again.

“Fuck me, princess, thought you’d never ask.”

You begin kissing again, unsure how much of that Megumi heard. But you make sure to keep your volume sufficiently high as you make out with his dad.

It’s the least he deserves for cheating.

© 2023 rinhaler

[txrasbae]

THE ONLY EXCEPTION

⋆·˚ ༘ *pairing⋆·˚ ༘ *- tara chamblerxfem!reader

‧₊˚ ⋅warnings* ‧₊ - none

*ੈ✩word count ‧₊˚ - 1,563

୨୧A/N - thank you to the server for forcing me to write this I'm actually very proud of it :3

my first idea of love was terrible. the first time i thought i knew what love was and how it should be, it was torn in half. only months before the apocalypse started, my parents got into a fight.

they always fought and i was used to the yelling. hell, i was even used to how aggressive my dad got. not this time. i couldn't do it anymore. it ended up with my parents getting a divorce.

all because i couldn't keep my mouth shut and my feelings inside.

ever since then, i swore to myself and to the future people I'd meet that i would never try to love someone or let anyone love me. they say you're parents are the draft for how you grow up to be. i didn't want to roll with that so i never fell in love. if i felt like i was going to? i'd just leave. cut whatever person i felt feelings for out.

then the breakout began, cities being taken out within the hour, buildings burning down from the mass bombing. both of my parents died quickly. my mom was taken out by a walker while we tried to make it back to my dad's place. i got there alone, only to find his rotting corpse.

to this day, all of it still feels like my fault. maybe if they weren't hating each other because of how stressed their fighting made me. maybe then they'd still be living together. maybe they would have little secret safety spots that they came up with together that we all could've hid out in. but no. it's not like that. now, i was sitting outside of a gated community. in this world, it felt like i was dreaming when they let me in. houses, baths, food, and even cattle. it was all real. after a couple of days of people warming up to me, i finally got my own home to live in.

so far i was only getting close with two people from the community, a man named glenn and a girl named tara. everyone else was just acquaintances.

glenn was caring, and extremely protective. i saw him as a brother but not the kind where he's always looking after me. he supported me and my decisions.

tara.

tara had the softest brown eyes. almost all of the time, her resting face was still so kind. she made me laugh all the time. her hair was growing long after i had been there for so long. she let me trim it sometimes which turned into me completely styling her hair in the silliest ways possible. i had even found some makeup in the drawers in my house and decided that tara would be a good model for me. anytime that i wasn't helping around the community i was with tara. she loved lightning moments when she could. she loves fist bumps and thinks they are a simple way of showing friendship. she loves having her hair up but lets it down around me. she prefers baggy clothing because it's not touching her skin as aggressively and skin-tight clothes. she likes the feeling when i sit over her lap while i draw on small hearts next to her eyes with eyeliner. "you should try it on both sides this time babe." she says with that same small giggle between every other word. i tilt my head to the side a bit before lifting my hand to hold onto her chin and turn it to the left.

i draw another heart and she smiles. her eyes were locked on mine and mine were staring at the crease of her eye. when i looked back to her pupils, they widened. expanded as if she were under the influence. both of our eyelids flutter a bit before i can't even think anymore because our lips are pressed together, melting against each other. it felt nice in the moment but my head started finding its track again and i stood up quickly. i was falling in love again.

every day, i would think about tara. her doe-like eyes. her pillowy pink lips. her hair. dry or when she comes out of the shower and puts on one of my t-shirts instead of hers. how couldn't i tell that i actually loved her? how did my brain not process that for so long?

i panicked in place for a second before rushing out of the room, leaving tara dumbfounded. she sat on the bed in silent confusion, now sat up with her arms supporting her as she stood up.

the bathroom door slammed shut as i stepped inside. at first, i tried to take deep breaths and shake away this dreading feeling of love but it didn't work. i just kept imagining her face and how nice her lips felt against mine. it was all too perfect and that was the exact issue. i was going to fall in love then it would be taken away from me in a blink of an eye. my back was pressed against the bathroom wall while i had my head in my hands. i quietly cursed at myself for letting this happen but quickly jumped at the soft knock from tara.

"y/n? you in there?" she totally knew i was in there. but that's how tara is, she's kind, compassionate, understanding, and patient.

i swallow a large lump in my throat and begin to speak. "yeah."

"could i...come in?" she said through the door, her voice slightly muffled but i could hear the affection and need in her words.

a long sigh left my mouth when i thought about her question. she stayed sitting outside of the door as i contemplated letting her in. it could lead to so many different things. i could confess my feelings for her and she would say that she felt the same. or i could confess and she could feel the complete opposite and all of my precautions and overthinking would be right.

i open the door with a small creak. i could see the saddened look in her eyes when she saw that i had been crying. she was the only person that had ever seen me cry like this. all she did was look at me with a caring expression. the corners of her lips were tugged down a bit and her eyes and eyebrows were dropped down.

"i know." she breathed out with a small huff. i snapped my head up from my gaze on the floor and met her eyes but i was still silent.

"i've known. when you first did my hair i could see it in your eyes." my eyes flutter a bit, a look of disbelief painted all over my face.

"you don't even have to say anything okay? i just know and i also know that i want more with you. i want more than little sleepovers as if we're kids. i want more than you doing my makeup. i want more than taking the mornings to ourselves to clean up the horse stables i want more than this. i just..." she takes in a large breath and lets it out while staring up at the ceiling. she then brought her head back down to look at me while small tears fell from my eyes.

"i want you."

part of me couldn't even process the words leaving her mouth. another part of me wanted to run away from this horrid feeling. this terrible terrible moment where i realized that this was it. then that last third part of me wanted to smash my lips against tara's. but i just stood and stared at her with pure worry in my eyes. imagine it was all a joke and she was fucking with my feelings.

of course, she wasn't.

"please say anythi-"

for the first time ever, i quickly wrapped my hands around the back of her head and pressed our lips together without tugging away to run. not a rushed kiss or a hungry kiss. just a kiss. a long one. i felt a small breath leave her lips, probably a gasp but my brain was fogged over so i couldn't tell. all i knew was that i couldn't go back after this. her hands linked together behind the small of my back and pulled my hips closer to hers, not for a second did she let our lips slip away from each other. we ended up stumbling all the way from the bathroom back to her room. she laid back down on her bed with me on her lap. her hands still held onto my waist while i wrapped mine around the very back of her neck. our lips sunk into each other like puzzle pieces. i could taste some sort of fruit juice on her lips.

eventually, her hands found their way into my hair. the sensation of her fingertips and slightly long nails against my scalp sent a chill up my back.

my throat and lungs were telling me to pull away to catch my breath but my hands, feeling her soft skin, said to stay. my nose, gently tapping right beneath her eye socket, said to stay. my hips, sat on top of hers without fear, said to stay. my entire body told me to stay. then tara pulled away.

"are you gonna stay?"

tags - @carlsangel @crxssbowcarl @aurasplanet @hiro--aoki @rositastara @deadgirlwalkingx

[lilyevanstan1325]

❤️ Built For This World ❤️

Chapter 9

My head hurts like a bitch.

My breath rises laboriously down my throat, coming out in trembling sighs from my ajar mouth.

I've been locked in Dale's RV for hours now and I don't plan on going anywhere, not until I'm sure Carol is okay.

Just as I am certain that my friend will never be okay again.

Never again.

A deafening silence surrounds us.

With my arms folded over the small table and my head resting on them I cast yet another worried glance in Daryl's direction.

The man is sitting on the sink counter, right next to the vehicle door.

Our eyes meet for a fraction of a second then he drops his gaze on the rifle he still holds in his arms.

We've been going like this for hours.

It's as if he feels guilty and can't keep his gaze on me, it's as if he fears seeing the disappointment in my eyes towards him because he feels personally responsible for what happened to Sophia.

I can see the anger and the pain eating him up from inside.

Even if only partially, I understand what he is feeling.

Daryl poured his heart into this research and now he feels like all this failure falls on his shoulders.

Sophia's death was a heavy blow for everyone.

Carol continues to sob and with each sob my heart breaks more and more.

Out the window I can see the others at work.

Some are digging holes while the others are moving the bodies.

I bury my face in my crossed arms again.

Old pains inside me seem to awaken, making my guts twist in a painful way.

It's as if in a fraction of a second, in the infinitesimal time that that damned bullet ended Sophia's life, all my demons resurrected from the dark place of my heart where I had buried them.

Even though I didn't have the time to get to know and love that little girl, I feel like I've lost someone important again.

Her death broke another small portion of my heart.

Nothing will be the same.

Carol will never be the same again.

Daryl will never be the same again.

And I know how selfish it is of me to worry about something like this but her death will inevitably change my relationship with these two people.

I feel like I've lost a mother for the second time.

A soft whistle makes me lift my head.

Daryl is looking at me intensely, in his eyes a concern that goes beyond human comprehension, in his eyes there is perhaps too much pain for a single soul.

“Ya good?” he whispers, his voice hoarse, speaking to me for the first time since he joined Carol and me in this RV.

I shrug weakly before immediately returning my attention to the woman in front of me.

Carol sitting on the bed and looking out the window doesn't even seem to notice our presence.

Her gaze is fixed and absent as if her mind is light years away.

And I feel fucking helpless.

Helpless in this such immense pain.

I think back to my mom, I think back to the day I had to say goodbye to her.

The knowledge that I will never see her smile again, that my ears will never again be able to enjoy her sweet laughter, hits me with such violence that it makes me breathless.

I think back to the last time I saw my father, I think back to the fact that I couldn't say goodbye to him...

A wave of tears gathers in my eyes forcing me to hide my face in my arms again.

Trying to hide the sobs shaking my chest, I bite my tongue until it bleeds.

A hand brushes my shoulder and then a strong arm wraps around them and I find myself with my face pressed against the archer's chest.

“Shhhhh.Everythin’ will be fine, sunshine” Daryl whispers in my ear, trying to gently silence my crying.

I feel terribly guilty.

What right do I have to cry?

Who gives me the right to suffer when in front of me I have a woman who has lost her little girl?

I feel like a monster and this only makes my sobs increase.

I try to suffocate them forcefully by burying my face in the man's chest and crumpling the fabric of his shirt between my fingers.

“Hey” he murmurs in a faint strangled voice, also wrapping his other arm around me, drawing me towards his body and taking me into his arms, he makes me sit on his lap.

I'm sorry to make him worry about me too but I can't help but feel happy for his closeness at this moment.

I should be stronger and be the one ready to console but in this moment all I can offer to Carol is just my presence, I can't do more.

I finally look up at Daryl's face who, despite being destroyed by pain, gives me a small smile, just a corner of his lips raised.

“Hey” he repeats cupping my face in his big hands.

“It will be fine.Now we have to be strong, alrigh’?”

I nod imperceptibly before his lips caress mine with such sweetness that it makes me tremble.

A light knock on the door makes us jump while Carol on the other hand doesn't even seem to notice.

After a few moments the door of the RV opens and Lori steps in.

The woman looks exhausted, her swollen and red eyes rest on me for a moment.

She doesn't seem surprised by my closeness to Daryl as she sketches a shy, tired smile in our direction after which she lets out a shaky breath as she lowers her gaze.

“They're ready.Come on” she exhales as if these few simple words had drained her of all energy.

I know what her words mean.

And God only knows how much they hurt.

My attention immediately shifts to Carol.

The woman shakes her head slightly without moving her tormented gaze from the window.

“Why?” she whispers.

Her voice brims with resignation.

Daryl beneath me shifts slightly, tightening his grip on me.

“’Cause that's yer little girl” he replies softly as his worry-filled eyes move to the woman.

Finally Carol's gaze turns towards us and the harshness I see within them scares me.

“That's not my little girl.That's some other…thing” she says, choking on her own words.

Then she lowers her gaze again, looking back at the field outside the RV.

For a moment no one speaks, perhaps too shocked by the cynicism of her words.

I can't understand her.

I didn't see my mother turn into one of those monstrous beings but I'm sure that even if it had happened, I would have wanted to witness her burial.

I would still have given her a last final goodbye.

“My Sophia…” Carol whispers in a breathy voice.

“My Sophia was alone in the woods.All this time I thought…” her words are just a quiet murmur as she fights her own tears.

“She didn't cry herself to sleep.She didn't go hungry.She didn't try to find her way back.Sophia died a long time ago”

I can feel Daryl tense up.

The resigned words of our friend crumbled the man's last bit of self-control.

I can feel the anger, the anger at not being able to find Sophia in time, boiling under his skin and crashing in waves all around him.

Lori, head bowed, steps back out of the RV.

I need to do something so without thinking twice I get up from my little safe haven and join Carol with a couple of determined, almost furious strides.

The man's determined footsteps sound behind me but when I turn around he is no longer there.

All this is definitely too much for him and, rather than bursting out and threw up all his disappointment, he has decided that it is better to let it go.

I stand in front of the woman, my hands resting on my hips and a thousand words that continue to boil into my head.

I breathe in and out slowly trying to calm my heartbeat.

“Carol, you can't be serious” I begin, trying to keep my emotions in check.

Now it's not about me but about her.

And I care enough about her to stop her from doing something I'm sure she'll regret in the future.

The woman doesn't even look at me, her stubborn gaze far from mine.

She shrugs as if to tell me who cares.

Softening my gaze and my posture I sit on the bed next to her tapping my knee on hers.

Slowly and with a sigh she turns in my direction, her large shining eyes making my stomach tighten in a vice.

I don't think I've ever seen so much pain reflected in the eyes of another human being.

Losing someone you love is always painful but losing a daughter...

I don't think there is a greater pain.

No one should ever feel such sorrow.

I lost my mom, my dad, my life...yet I survived.

Yet I still fight.

But Sophia…she was her flesh and blood.

Every breath she takes hurts right now and will do so for every single day she lives.

Even though she will be surrounded by people who love her she will never love anyone else like she loved her sweet little girl.

And it is precisely for this reason that Carol must give her a final goodbye.

“Carol I won't pretend to understand how you feel right now, really.But you have to do it.You have to get out of here and say goodbye to your little girl”

The woman shakes her head, a few tears escape her control sliding down her cheeks.

“Listen to me.That may not be your little girl out there but her spirit is still here.Give her the peace she deserves.Sophia deserves to rest in peace and she will never be able to do so if her mom doesn't let her go”

The words get stuck in my throat but I continue undaunted, even ignoring the woman's sobs which slowly grow in intensity.

I grab her hands and squeeze them in mine.

“You're not alone, Carol.You have Daryl.You have Rick.And Dale, and Lori, and Glenn.We are all here for you.I'm here for you.You have me”

I lift her hands still clasped in mine to kiss her knuckles softly and stop fighting my own tears.

“I am here.I know that nothing will ever fill that void but I'm here.Maybe you don't even care but if you give up...I need you Carol.If you don't say goodbye to your sweet little girl today you will lose yourself...I will lose you”

A sob shakes both of our chests at the same time.

I sniffle, wiping my tears against my own shoulder.

“If it wasn't for you maybe I would still be tied up in that stable or Shane would have already broken my neck.You are all I have left.Please Carol…I've already lost my mom…I can't lose you too”

I know it's sound so fucking selfish.

I know I should think of her best.

But…but I've already lost so much that I don't know if I could get through this too.

By now we are both crying without any restraint.

Both heartbroken but for two completely opposite reasons.

Then through tears and pain Carol nods.

I smile at her weakly through tears.

“I will be with you, step by step.I'll stick so close to your ass that you'll end up hating me.But you will never be alone.Never” I tell her, drawing a light laugh from her which is immediately suffocated by yet another sob from her.

I let go of her hands so I can hug her.

I hold her head against my chest, stroking her hair.

Carol presses her face against me and I let her vent, welcoming all her tears, all her pain, hoping to make it a little mine and lighten this painful load on her soul.

When we arrive near the trees where the holes were dug for Sophia and Hersel's family, there is no one left.

Hesitant Carol approaches the smaller mound of earth, kneeling in front of it.

Without disturbing her, I kneel next to her, stroking her back in a reassuring manner.

Carol lowers her head, sinking her hands into the freshly loose dirt, crying all her tears, giving vent to all her pain.

“It's okay, honey.It's okay” I try to reassure her when the tears seem to take her breath away.

Footsteps come from behind us.

Daryl clears his throat before dropping to one knee alongside Carol.

In his hands he holds a small bouquet of Cherokee roses.

I smile at his sweet gesture.

“Do ya want…”

Carol shakes her head vigorously, interrupting the man.

“Would you do it for me?” she croaks in response.

Daryl doesn't have to be told twice and, standing up, places the flowers on little Sophia's grave with unprecedented delicacy.

When he stands up, his gaze rests on my face for a moment and then immediately lowers it and turns his back on us.

Even though the contact between our eyes was brief, I managed to catch the glimmer of his tears.

Making sure Carol is okay, I get up, brushing the dirt off my knees with my hands and with a hesitant step I approach the man's back, placing a hand on it.

Daryl gasps violently without turning so determined to respect his wishes I don't look for his gaze.

I just hug him from behind, intertwining my fingers on his abdomen.

His chest rises and falls rapidly.

He is crying.

And for the umpteenth time today my heart breaks.

I rest my cheek on his back trying to offer him the only thing I have at the moment.

My love.

Because yes, it may be crazy, but I feel like I feel something for this man that goes far beyond the simple attraction.

Because, surrounded by all this pain, I understood that if I had been the one to lose him, I wouldn't have tolerated it.

Today with the discovery of Sophia's now dead body I clearly understood that I cannot lose him.

“I'm here, big boy.I'm here" I whisper kissing him between his shoulder blades.

In response, his calloused fingers intertwine with mine and his breathing slowly slows, his body relaxes.

Daryl Dixon is all I have and I will always protect him.

I will forever protect his pure and tortured soul.

Behind us, a rustle of clothes followed by a timid voice brings us back to the present.

I slowly release my hands from the archer's and focus on Carol again.

A sad smile flits across her face as she stretches her arms in my direction.

Without having to tell me anything I give her what her eyes are asking me.

I hug her and even though I'm shorter than her I welcome her head against my chest.

Her arms envelop me while her voice, made hoarse by her tears, murmurs a small thank you.

Carol raises her head and waving a hand behind me she whispers “Come here, pookie”

After a few moments, Daryl's chest is pressed against my back.

All three held in one embrace.

All together as a family.

Because now we are a family.

We may not be connected by blood but something much stronger unites us.

We chose each other and we will protect each other as long as we have breath in our bodies.

After making sure Carol was okay, I begged Daryl to never leave her side and to come find me if there were any problems.

“Hey, I can handle her.Go” murmurs the archer, squeezing my upper arm with his hand and after kissing my forehead he moves away and sits a few steps away from Carol who is kneeling again in front of her daughter's tomb.

I really want to stay here and not leave her but I need to go check on Rick.

The desperation painted in his eyes after he pulled the trigger haunts a part of my brain.

His lost gaze wandering aimlessly as it fell on every person gathered around him is seared into my mind.

With a determined step I head towards Hersel's big house.

When my feet touch the first steps of the porch I feel a shiver shake me.

The house seems quiet when I walk through the door so looking around I head towards the kitchen but halfway I bump into a figure who quickly tries to reach the back door.

“Ouch” I hiss, running my hand over the bandage over my eyebrow as Glenn wraps a hand around his nose, his eyes bright from the impact.

“Where are you going in such a hurry, buddy?” I peep, pressing my fingers over the white gauze, underneath I can feel the slight pulsation from the stitches.

Glenn moves his hand away from his face, sniffing.

“Sorry Sum.I'm catching up with Rick.We're going to look for Hersel” he replies, trying to dodge me to reach the door.

I follow him, following his every step.

Hersel?

Why?

What happened?

“Glenn!” I get his attention by grabbing his hand.

The boy stops his run, finally resting his eyes on me.

“Beth seems to be in shock and we can't find Hersel anywhere.Rick and I are going to the bar downtown to look for him”

I nod once.

“I'll come with you” I offer immediately.

Even though a big part of me is screaming at me to stay here, to protect Carol, to stay by Daryl's side, I know I can't do it.

A little voice in my head keeps telling me that right now I'm an outsider and that I can't intrude on these people's pain so any distraction is welcomed.

And looking for the vet, being able to move away from here, seems to me to be the most suitable solution.

Glenn shakes his head as he grabs a rifle from on top of an old coffee table.

Before he can argue I place the flat palm of my hand against his mouth.

“I'm not asking your permission” I wink and, watching him while he snorts resignedly, I follow him through the back door.

Once outside we find Maggie leaning with her back to the wall and her arms crossed in front of her chest.

Smiling at her I leave them alone as I approach Rick.

The former officer doesn't even look at me but I can see a corner of his lips lifting into a sly smile.

“I bet you'll join us” he murmurs with a nod towards the car.

“Obviously.In fact, I'm offended that you didn't come looking for me.Do you really think I would have let you go alone?” I reply in a light but serious tone, giving him a playful shove.

Rick chuckles under his breath.

“Do you have a weapon?”

“I have my knife”

“Take this” he replies handing me a gun which I accept without replying.

I know that the use of guns must be strictly necessary due to the noise but nowadays it is better not to be caught unprepared.

“Does Daryl know?”

His question catches me off guard, making my gaze move from the weapon I hold in my hands to his face.

His clear blue eyes are focused behind me.

“He's not my fucking nanny” I huff, following the direction of his gaze.

My lips curve upwards.

“They're cute, aren't they?” I chuckle, returning my attention to the man next to me.

Rick smiles and then directs his glittering gaze of mischievous into mine.

“Yeah.You and Daryl are cute too.This is why you have to tell him where you're going because I don't want to catch an arrow up my ass”

I blush at his statement but intending not to show it I put on a cooky smile.

“Your ass is safe, cop.Let's go” I urge him, getting into the car while Glenn joins us with his shoulders down.

Rick sits in the driving seat while Glenn sits next to him, I sit in the center of the back seat so I can have a good view of the road and the men in front of me.

The journey proceeds in silence.

None of us speak perhaps too lost in our mental ruminations.

Too many things happened today and all too quickly.

Shane lost his mind.

We have all lost it.

Heavy words were flown and after all this I don't know if the group will ever go back to how it used to be.

Glenn continues to fidget on his spot.

Rick sends me worried looks through the rearview mirror, looks to which I respond with constant shrugs.

I honestly can't understand what's going on in my friend's head at the moment.

When the outlines of the buildings in the city appear on the horizon Glenn breaks the silence that surrounds us.

“Maggie said she loves me” he suddenly blurts out, turning his gaze towards Rick.

I smile radiantly.

“That’s great, Glenn” I laugh, leaning forward and placing a hand on his shoulder.

Glenn looks back at me but his face is serious.

Too serious.

Wait.

“That's a good thing, right?” I ask now unsure.

I certainly didn't expect such a detached reaction from the delivery guy.

If I had been in his place, if Daryl had said he loved me, I think I would have jumped out of my own skin.

The thought makes me blush and I chew my lower lip.

Glenn lets out a nervous laugh.

“She doesn't mean It.I mean she doesn't.I mean…well…she…she's upset or confused.She’s probably feeling like…” he exclaims, speaking hurriedly, the stuttered words rolling off his lips quickly.

“I think she's smart enough to know what she's feeling” Rick interrupts, eliciting a confident shake of the head from Glenn.

“No, no!”

Rick and I smile amused by his reaction.

“No it does not.You know what?She wants to be in love, so she's…she needs something to…to, like…to hold onto” continues the boy undaunted.

I can understand him.

Nowadays, becoming so attached to someone, even falling in love, is always a big risk.

We may never live long enough or even worse we may helplessly witness the death of those we love.

I understand why he tries to push away her feelings.

After all, how long has he known Maggie?

He knows her just a few days longer than I know Daryl.

I understand how the magnitude of such a huge, sudden feeling can catch you off guard.

But that doesn't mean it's right to reject it, on the contrary we must live it as much as we can because if Sophia's death has taught us anything it is that nothing lasts forever anymore.

Then it's best to bask in what little love we have left in the little time we have left.

“Glenn, it's pretty obvious to everyone Maggie loves you.For everyone except you of course, you stupid hassole.And not just because you're one of the last men standing” I encourage him, resting my chin on the seat where he sits.

Rick nods as if he agrees with every single word I say.

“I mean what's the problem?” I add softly.

Glenn looks out the window as if he's trying to coax the right words into his confused head.

“I didn't say it back”

“Shit” Rick and I exclaim at the same time.

I rise from my position to rest my back against the soft leather seat crossing my arms over my chest.

“Oh man.You fucked up” I tease him by pushing the sole of my boot against his seat.

“Hey!” he exclaims, turning his torso in my direction.

“I was nervous, okay?I've never had a woman say that to me before.You know, except for my mom, of course, and my sisters.But with Maggie, it's different.We barely know each other.What…what does she really know about me?Nothing!We're practically strangers”

The words slip out of my mouth before I can realize it.

“So?Even I barely know Daryl but I love him anyway”

When my words hit my own ears I curse myself.

I look down at my crossed arms chewing my cheeks nervously.

Why the hell did I say that?

God, I wish right now a chasm would open up under my stupid ass and swallow me.

A loud laugh resonates in the cockpit making me blush even more, I can feel my blood rushing through my veins violently.

I risk a look in front of me, finding Glenn's sly smile and Rick's bright and attentive eyes staring at me from the rearview mirror.

“Not a word, dumbass” I mutter, making both of us laugh this time.

Rick shakes his head with an amused expression and then turns his attention to the man sitting next to him.

“Listen to me, Glenn.This is a good thing, something we don't get enough of these days.Enjoy it.And when we get back, return the favor.It's not like she's going anywhere.And…”

I can feel Rick's smile as he turns his head ever so slightly in my direction.

“Same goes for you Summer.Tell Daryl how you feel”

Determined to ignore him I refuse to meet his gaze, he's too amused for my tastes.

“We're not talking about me.Keeps driving, sheriff” I murmur with an angry frown as the man slows down, having now reached the center of the city.

I don't like this attention towards me.

After a few minutes Rick pulls over the car and looking around, making sure the road is clear of dangers, we get out of the car and go into the bar that Maggie had suggested.

The room is dark and dusty.

Under my feet the dark wooden floor, matching the chairs and tables, creaks.

Rick proceeds slowly and Glenn, after a final glance towards the street, closes the door behind us.

Hersel is sitting on a stool right in front of us, his back to us while his arms are resting on the counter, in his hands he seems to be holding a glass full of an amber liquid.

After everything that's happened, I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't like a drop too.

“Hersel?” Rick calls him cautiously.

The man doesn't flinch, he doesn't move.

He doesn't seem at all surprised by our presence.

“Who's with you?” the man asks without turning.

His voice barely holds back the agonizing pain.

For him we are only the murderers of his family, we are the people who turned his peaceful life upside down.

“Summer.And Glenn” replies the former officer remaining still.

“Did Maggie send them?”

“They volunteered.They're worried”

Glenn and I exchange a look, leaving Rick to resolve the matter.

Slowly Rick approaches.

I grab Glenn's hand and indicate with a nod to one of the tables, the furthest from the two men but the closest to the windows at the entrance, so as to be able to leave the right amount of privacy to the two men but close enough to keep an eye on the situation outside.

Rick and Hersel's words are just a low murmur so I take the opportunity to talk to Glenn.

“Hey!What happened after…” I don't finish my sentence, Glenn knows what I'm referring to.

What happened after Rick shot Sophia.

Glenn glances at the counter and then brings his big dark eyes back to me.

With a slow movement he places the rifle on the table, running his hands through his hair.

“Shane accused Hersel of knowing that Sophia was in the barn and now he wants us out of his land”

“Shit”

“Yeah, shit”

“And you?What do you think you will do?” I ask even though deep down I already know the answer.

“What do you mean?" he whispers in response, avoiding my gaze.

One corner of my lips lifts.

I gently place a hand on that of the boy in front of me.

“You know what I'm talking about”

Glenn shakes his head, removing his hand from my grip and crossing his arms over his chest.

I can feel the confusion in his mind from here.

“I honestly don't know”

“Are you sure?”

“Maggie will never leave her family”

“I know”

“And I can't leave mine” Glenn sighs heartbroken, finally deciding to bring his frightened and lost gaze back into mine.

“Glenn, we are not your family”

I immediately stop him with a wave of my hand when I see his gaze darken, offended by my words.

“I don't mean that.Yes, it's true we are a family but she is the love of your life.How do you think I can ever live in peace knowing that I took you away from her?None of us could stand it, Glenn.But she has her father, Beth, Patricia, Jimmy.They have a safe place and I...I would be much calmer knowing you were there than in the middle of that shit out there” I try to make him think while I point the way outside with a finger.

Glenn sighs, closing his eyes and leaning back in the chair, his fingers wrapping around the locks of his hair, pulling them tightly.

The situation he finds himself in is not easy because, putting myself in his shoes, I am sure that, even though the choice would make me suffer, I would choose to follow the person I love.

I would choose Daryl.

“If Daryl asked you to give up everything and everyone, would you do it?”

I nod again before Glenn finishes his question.

He looks at me with a skeptical frown, I smile back at him.

“This doesn't mean I don't care about you but I'm sure I'll never find such a great love again.How could I leave him behind?”

Glenn seems to reflect on my words even though his furrowed eyebrows indicate that an ocean of conflicting emotions is still churning within him.

Some footsteps catch our attention and when we look behind us we see Rick approach the door of the bar and open it, Glenn and I immediately go alongside him to understand what is happening.

Rick shakes his head dejectedly but he seems to think about something so he turns back to the vet who still stubbornly turns his back on us.

“So what do we do?Just wait for him to pass out?” Glenn asks on the doorstep.

“Just go.Just go!” Hersel silences us.

Rick takes a couple of steps in his direction.

“I promised Maggie I'd bring you home safe”

Rick barely keeps his calm as he tries to reason with the man who in response snorts amused.

“Like you promised that little girl?”

His words take us by surprise with their wickedness.

He must be really upset, Hersel isn't like that.

But before Glenn and I can avoid it, Rick reaches the man, his nervous footsteps sounding loud and confident on the old wooden floor.

“So what's your plan?Finish that bottle?Drink yourself to death and leave your girls alone?”

“Stop telling me how to care for my family, my farm” Hersel blurts out, slamming the empty glass on the counter and finally deciding to get up and face Rick angrily.

“Your people are like a plague!I do a Christian thing, give you shelter, and you destroy it all!” he shouts while gesticulating senselessly but Rick doesn't seem intimidated by all that anger.

“The world was already in bad shape when we met”

“And you take no responsibility!You're supposed to be their leader!”

“Well I'm here now, aren't I?”

The two men are now shouting at each other.

With the tip of my boot I hit Glenn's foot, silently asking him if we shouldn't intervene before the situation can escalate further or, even worse, their screams can attract unwanted attention.

Glenn raises a hand as if telling me to wait.

In fact, after a few moments Hersel seems to calm down and regain some lucidity.

“Yes.Yes, you are” he sighs, staggering towards the stool and collapsing onto it, after which he grabs the glass and takes another sip.

“Come on” Rick urges him again with an authoritative voice but this time with a little more sweetness.

“Your girls need you now more than ever” I whisper moving closer until I reach the man, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Hersel looks at me with his deep blue eyes with a storm reflected in them.

“I didn't want to believe you” he says, dodging my hand violently but keeping his gaze fixed on mine.

“You told me there was no cure, that these people were dead, not sick.I choose not to believe that.But when Shane shot Lou in the chest and she just kept coming, that's when I knew what an ass I'd been, that Annette had been dead long ago and I was feeding a rotten corpse!That's when I knew there was no hope.And when that little girl came out of the barn, the look on your face, while you held her mother in your arms, I knew you knew too.Right?”

His words freeze my blood in my veins.

I remember that moment.

The moment I realized it was all over.

That there is no more hope.

That all hope died the moment Sophia stepped out of that damn barn.

The sweet vet's eyes are filled with tears just like mine.

Behind us Rick and Glenn seem to be holding their breath.

“There is no hope, Summer.And you know it now, like I do.Don't you?”

I put a hand on my chest trying to contain the pain that this man's words are awakening in my old broken soul.

A solitary tear escapes my control, eliciting a bitter smile from the man.

“There is no hope for any of us, Summer” he sighs, turning his back on me again.

My gaze shifts to my two friends who are looking at me helplessly while I sink into my own pain but...it is thanks to they worried gaze that I find the way back to myself.

I approach and position myself between them.

“It's not like that Hersel.Maybe...maybe a week ago I would have agreed with you.I was alone.Scared.I was ready to die alone.But then…then I found them” I murmur, smiling sweetly at the two men.

“I found friends”

I smile in Glenn's direction.

“I found a brother”

I say with more and more conviction, touching Rick's hand.

“I found love”

And I feel my heart explode thinking about the gruff man who must surely be worrying waiting for my return.

“I found a family.I have found hope again”

This time my voice sounds strong and confident around us.

“And if you can't see the beauty and the wonder and how God is so immense to still grant us these joys in this dirty, depraved world I feel sorry for you Hersel.I'm really sorry”

Glenn wraps an arm around my shoulders, leaving a kiss on my temple.

Rick squeezes my hand and then approaches Hersel in a last tired attempt to make him reason once and for all.

“Look, I'm done.I'm not doing this anymore, cleaning up after you.Do you know what the truth is?Nothing has changed.Death is death.It's always been there, whether it's from a heart attack, cancer or a walker.What's the difference?You didn't think it was hopeless before, did you?Now there are people back at home trying to hang on.They need us even if it's just to give them a reason to go on, even if we don't believe it ourselves”

Rick wearily runs a hand over his face, nerves on edge.

This discussion is wearing him down.

He believes in what he says.

He truly believes there is still hope.

And I believe it too.

“You know what?This…this isn't about what we believe anymore.It's about them.It's about Beth.It's about Maggie and Glenn.It's about Summer.It's about my pregnant wife.Now it's only about the people we love, the people we want to protect”

Hersel remains silent, visibly affected by Rick's words.

He stares at us for a few interminable seconds and then after drinking the contents of the glass to the last drop he stands up.

I smile encouragingly in his direction as Rick squeezes his shoulder affectionately.

Suddenly the door behind us creaks and two armed men appear in the doorway.

Damn.

We were so distracted by ourselves that we didn't stay alert enough.

After a quick look inside the two men focus their gaze on me making me shiver.

Glenn notices this and slowly, almost casually, grabs my wrist and moves me behind him.

“Son of bitch.They're alive" one of the two men sneers.

Both seem quite strong and this makes me suspect that they belong to a large and resourceful group.

They're basically a fucking danger.

They approach one of the tables while Glenn and I slowly move behind the counter.

Rick, feigning courtesy, approaches the table, pouring them both a generous dose of the same liquor that Hersel was drinking.

“I’m Dave” one of the two men introduces himself.

He is very tall, with short hair and a look that is too attentive for my tastes.

He is wearing an old pair of dark jeans and his arms are left exposed by a sleeveless t-shirt.

Around his neck he wears a gold chain that clashes terribly with everything else.

His fingers tighten around the butt of his gun.

His dark eyes rest on me again, looking me up and down and then winking in a way that in his fucking mind should be attractive.

I gag mentally.

In response I roll my eyes while Glenn stiffens, moving the rifle in his hands in order to get the guy's attention.

Dave continues with his rant as if nothing had happened.

“That scrawny-looking douche bag there is Tony”

Tony is a man with a stocky build, the t-shirt he wears pulls over his prominent abdomen.

“Eat me, Dave” Tony laughs, a loud, disgusting laugh.

“Hey, maybe someday I will” replies his friend, grabbing the glass and drinking, his eyes close as if he were tasting a fine liqueur and not a third-rate alcoholic drink in a worn-out bar.

I look around noticing the tight smiles on my friends' faces.

We have to find a way to get out of here without these bastards following us.

And even though none of us are visibly interested in the two of them, Dave continues to tell his story.

“We Met on I-95 coming out of Philly.Damn shit-show that was” Dave chuckles and then he goes back to staring at me intently.

From behind the counter Glenn grabs my hand and squeezes it forcefully, a clear signal to tell me to stay calm and play along.

Glenn laughs, thus diverting attention from me.

“I'm Glenn.It's nice to meet some new people”

“Rick Grimes.This is Hersel” Rick murmurs, passing a glass to Tony.

For a few moments a strange silence fills the air and then Dave's eyes are on me again, specifically on my boobs.

The man licks his lips, adjusting the crotch of his trousers in an absolutely disgusting way.

“How about you, sugar.Do you have a name?"

Tempted to respond with my innate sarcasm, I bite my tongue and count to ten.

With my face devoid of any emotion I force myself to speak but before I can do that Rick precedes me.

“She's my sister, she's got a name.And she's got a pretty rough husband.A man with a little problem of self-control, try to stay in yours, okay?”

This time the kindness is completely gone as he slowly hisses the words.

I shrug in response as Dave returns his gaze to me as he drinks the entire contents of his glass.

Him and Rick exchange a strange look, full of tension, then the man holds out his gun towards Rick.

“Not bad, huh?I got it off a cop”

“I’m a cop”

“This one was already dead” the man justifies himself even if I have the clear impression that this isn't true.

Then silence falls again.

The air around us crackles with a strange electricity, just like when the sky fills with clouds waiting for the storm that will sweep everything away.

Rick pours himself a glass of liquor too, displaying the right amount of nonchalance.

“You fellas are a long way from Philadelphia” he murmurs with his lips touching the edge of the glass.

His Adam's apple bobs up and down as he swallows.

“It’s feels like we’re a long way from anywhere” replies Dave.

Apparently he is the brains of the group.

His friend, Tony, simply nods and looks furtively around.

“Well, what drove you south?” Rick asks politely.

My foot begins tapping nervously on the floor as anxiety rises up my stomach.

We have to get out of here.

Glenn, noticing my nervousness, places a hand on my back, caressing it with small circular movements.

“Well, I can tell you it wasn't the weather.I must've dropped thirty pounds in sweat alone down here”

“I wish” Tony chuckles but his friend goes on ignoring him, as if he hadn't even opened his mouth.

“First It was D.C., I heard there might be some kind of refugee camp, but the roads were so jammed, we never got close.We decided to get off the highways, into the sticks, jeep hauling ass.Every group we came across had a new rumor about a way out of this thing”

Well apparently they're not doing well out there.

Right now the farm is the only safe place and we need to make sure it stays that way.

“One guy told us there was the Coast Guard sitting in the Gulf, sending ferries to the islands” adds Tony nodding absently.

“The latest was a rail yard in Montgomery running trains to the middle of the country…Kansans, Nebraska”

“Nebraska?” Glenn asks genuinely confused.

Tony nods.

“Low population, lots of fun” he adds with a wink.

“Kinda makes sense” Glenn replies.

“Ever been to Nebraska, sugar?”

I sigh in frustration, pinching the bridge of my nose between two fingers.

I'm starting to lose my patience.

“Summer.My name is Summer, no sugar.Summer” I hiss, immediately adding “Anyway, no, never been to Nebraska”

“I like you, Summer” he replies languidly and then adds “Anyway there's a reason why they call 'em flyover states.So...how about you guys?”

“Fort Benning, eventually” Rick replies indifferently even if knowing him what he passes off as indifference is nothing more than a warning.

Smart move.

Well done Rick.

Tony and Dave exchange a look followed by a chuckle.

“I hate to piss in your cornflakes, officer, but, um…we ran across a grunt who was stationed at Benning.He said the place was overrun by lamebrains” adds the latter.

Glenn and I exchange worried looks.

This means that things outside are worse than we thought.

But we can't worry about that now, our problem now is these two idiots.

“Wait, Fort Benning is gone?Shit.What will we do now, big brother?” I ask in a worried tone, turning to Rick and hoping to sound convincing enough even if my anxiety isn't entirely fake.

If Hersel is still convinced of the idea of sending us away we will be in shit.

The real shit.

Rick gives me a reassuring look.

“Sadly, I am.Oddly, the truth is there is no way out of this mess.Just keep going from one pipe dream to the next, praying one of these mindless freaks doesn't grab a hold of you when you sleep”

For a moment Dave's words seem to weigh on all of us.

Even on him.

Tony gets up approaching the counter and turning his back to us we can hear the sound of a zip followed immediately by a loud noise.

Tony is practically pissing two steps away from us regardless of anything.

Disgusting bastard.

Dave settles into the chair, spreading his legs and clicking his fingers on his gun resting on the table.

“So what…so what, you guys set up on the outskirts or something?” he asks almost with disinterest.

Jackpot, jerk.

One corner of my lips lifts.

It was more than obvious from the first moment that these two are trying to get to this point.

Instinctively I tighten my fingers around the butt of the gun I have in my jeans pocket.

I have a sixth sense that this isn't going to end well.

“That new development?Trailer park or something?A farm?” adds Tony still busy with his personal business.

We all exchange a warning look as if to imply that whatever happens we must keep our mouths shut.

The heavy silence seems to capture Dave's attention.

“You got a farm?” he asks, exchanging a long look with Rick who, without betraying any emotion, remains silent.

“Is it safe?You got food, water?” he insists with a sly look.

His dark eyes move over each of us, perhaps looking for the weakest of us from whom he can extort the much sought-after information but he is interrupted by his friend who, lifting his zip, turns towards us and exclaims “You got cooze?Ain't had a piece of ass in weeks.Excluding yours, sweetheart”

The man finishes the sentence by winking at me.

I return his gaze, filling my own with obvious disgust.

Dave scolds him with a look, a silent warning not to screw this up, and then he raises his hands in front of him with palms facing me as if he's apologizing.

“Listen, sorry my friend.City kids…they got no tact.No disrespect.So...listen, Glenn...”

Now at the limit of my patience, I come out from behind the counter, ignoring the warning glances from my friend and positioning myself next to Rick.

“We've said enough.Rick maybe it's best to leave” I say with firmness in my voice.

Rick nods slightly.

Good.

Now we have to make sure they don't follow us.

Dave stands up.

“Wait, hang on a sec.This farm…it sounds pretty sweet.How about a little southern hospitality.We got some buddies back at camp, been having a real hard time.I don't see why you can't make room for a few more.We can pool our resources, our manpower”

Rick shakes his head but before he can speak I anticipate him.

“Look, we're sorry.That's not an option”

Dave and Tony exchange a brief but significant look.

My words definitely pissed them off.

Dave puts the gun in the back pocket of his filthy jeans and then smiles at us.

“I don't see the problem” he adds, trying to convince us.

They don't know that they are playing with the wrong people.

I know this type of men, the sanctuary was full of them.

They will have no scruples.

I know how they think.

“Sorry, we can't help you” Rick's words are calm but peremptory.

There is no fucking way for what they think to happen.

“I thought, ya know…I thought we were friends.We got people we gotta look out for too”

Rick shrugs at Dave's words.

“We don't know anything about you” Rick explains simply as if this were enough to make them understand the reasons for our refusal.

Dave shakes his head and sighs.

“That's true.You don't know anything about us.You don't know we've had to go through out there, the things we've had to do”

“We too did things that had to be done, even if we didn't want to” I interrupt him, tired to play fast and loose.

I'm tired now and this makes the tension only increase.

“Oh, I know.I know, sugar.We are all the same.So come on, let's take a nice friendly hayride to this farm and we'll get to know each other”

Fucking prick.

Rick smiles.

And I swear that if I didn't know him I would shiver from head to toe.

That smile of his is dangerous.

“This is bullshit!”

Tony becomes agitated at our side while he places the rifle on his shoulder with one hand.

The man is sweating profusely, a clear sign that he is losing patience and this does not bode well.

And in fact as soon as Rick tells him to calm down the man completely loses his composure and starts screaming.

“Don't tell me to calm down.Don't tell me to calm down.I'll shoot you four assholes in the head and take your damn farm”

“Whoa” I exclaim approaching the man with the gun clutched in my hand.

Rick behind me tries to pull me towards him.

Dave also tries to calm things down by telling everyone to calm down.

I remain still in my place, feet planted firmly on the ground and the gun in front of me.

“Take it easy.Nobody's killing nobody" Dave exclaims, placing a hand on Rick's shoulder and then leaping over the counter.

I don't move an inch, I just lower the barrel of my gun and look behind me where I see Dave placing the gun on the counter and ducking behind it in search of something good to drink, continuing to repeat that no one will die today and that we are friends.

Yeah, kiss my ass moron.

Rick's hand twitches towards his gun.

An imperceptible movement but I can see it.

Without being too dramatic, I turn towards Hersel who, with a small nod of his head, lets me know that he is fine.

Glenn, on the other hand, appears much more agitated.

His haunted gaze moves quickly among everyone present and then settles on mine.

I'm good I mimic with my lips and a bit of tension seems to leave his rigid shoulders.

“You gotta understand” Dave sighs as he pours himself a glass of liquor.

“We can’t stay out there”

“I miss the part where this is our problem” I hiss giving him my full attention.

The man doesn't seem irritated by my words, in fact he smiles.

“Listen man the farm is too crowded as it is.I'm sorry.You'll have to keep looking” Rick tries to mediate, throwing at me a hard gaze, imploring me with his gaze to keep my mouth shut.

Dave nods.

“Keep looking” he murmurs with his lips pressed against the rim of the glass, taking a moment to swallow the amber liquid.

“Where do you suggest we do that” he finally replies, placing the glass in front of him.

“I hear Nebraska's nice” I respond immediately with a toothy smile.

Dave laughs in response, throwing his head back.

“Nebraska.You're so feral, I like you” he chuckles and in the blink of an eye he grabs his gun but Rick is much faster than him exploding a shot straight at the man's head.

Without thinking twice I turn my back on Rick, leaning it against his and without even aiming I fire two shots at Tony's chest.

The man doesn't even have time to react, his awkward movements in grabbing the rifle to try to defend himself were fatal.

The shots ring out like rolls of thunder within the walls of the bar.

The man's enormous body collapses to the ground while two patches of crimson red spread across his white t-shirt, adding to the dirt that adorned it.

With an empty head I let my arms fall lifeless to my sides, the gun slipping from my fingers and falling to the wooden floor with a dull thud.

I watch as if hypnotized as the blood spreads.

It's the first time I've killed another human being.

I shot my mom but she was already dead...

My hands are shaking wildly and I ball them into fists trying to keep them at bay.

When I was at the sanctuary I never had to kill anyone.

He never allowed it.

For him I had to remain clean from this point of view for as long as possible.

He never wanted me to stain my soul with one of the most atrocious acts in the world, that is, taking the life of another human being.

When I ran away, on my long journey, I was lucky enough to meet few people and I always managed to avoid them without being discovered.

But now I had to do it.

I had to.

I couldn't let anything happen to my friends.

In the fog of my thoughts I can hear the sound of Rick's boots coming alongside me.

Then another shot.

And now Tony's face is also covered in blood.

I killed a human being.

“Summer?Summer, are you okay?”

Rick's warm, reassuring fingers touch my cheek and when I force my gaze to move from the lifeless body in front of me to him I don't know what he's reading because a moment later his arms are wrapped around my shoulders.

I can feel the sound of his voice through his large chest.

“It's okay” he whispers gently without loosening his grip on me.

I feel lost.

It's as if I wanted to cry but I no longer had a soul in my body.

I killed a human being.

A living person.

I weakly push my hands against Rick's chest.

His blue eyes observe me, a wrinkle of concern furrows his face.

For a moment I see Tony's corpse in front of my eyes and a wave of nausea overwhelms me, forcing me to close them.

Stunned, I tighten my fingers around Rick's shirt.

Other steps reach us and now Glenn is also at my side, I avoid his gaze as I delicately move away from his light touch.

I feel dirty and I don't want him to get dirty by touching me.

His soul is still pure...

Mine...

I feel like I lost mine the moment I pulled the trigger.

“I…” I croak, not recognizing my own voice.

“Rick…I…”

The worried look of my close friend softens and the worry wrinkle between his eyes smoothes out.

“Is your first time?”

I nod with a shy nod, lowering my eyes to my hands that are crushing the faded cotton of his shirt.

Rick's lips rest delicately on my forehead.

I'm still waiting for the tears but they don't come.

I want to cry, wash away my sins with my tears but they just don't come.

No matter how hard I try my eyes remain empty and dry.

It's as if my own body is punishing me for my reprehensible actions.

You killed another living being, you deserve to suffer by keeping it all inside.

Moving away from everyone, I head towards the door, deliberately ignoring the blood of the man lying at my feet which slowly spreads across the floor in a large dark and dense puddle.

I reach the door observing the outside.

In addition to our car there is another, certainly the car of the two unfortunate people who are now lying lifeless on the floor.

The devastating silence roars loudly in my ears until the vet's voice snaps me out of my horrible thoughts.

“Let's head back”

And although until a few minutes ago I wanted nothing more than to go back to Daryl more than anything in the world, now the very idea terrifies me.

How will I be able to look him in the eyes?

How will he still see me as the wonderful person he saw in me until this morning?

I feel like I should stay here.

My place is here in the midst of death, the same death I feel in my heart.

Behind me I hear my friends' footsteps approaching but before they can do anything else I see lights across the street.

A car.

“Car.Car!Get down” I exclaim lowering myself while the others imitate my same gesture.

After a few moments the car stops and parks right in front of the bar.

The sound of the doors opening is followed by the sound of footsteps.

“Dave?Tony?”

Shit!

Someone came looking for those two bastards.

They were right after all, they were not alone.

“I'm telling you.I heard shots”

“I saw roamers two streets over”

From the voices it seems to understand that there are three of them.

Damn.

I exchange a quick glance with Rick and Glenn, both of whom are on the opposite side of the door while Hersel next to me squeezes my shoulder with his fingers.

The three men talk to each other trying to find out the whereabouts of their friends.

We clearly hear their footsteps along the sidewalk as they argue with each other, ordering each other to be quiet and continue searching.

Rick gets up peering from behind the curtain then, remaining crouched, we approach each other.

“Why won't they leave?” Glenn asks in an agitated tone.

For the first time I look him in the eyes again.

“Would you?” I ask him.

And even if my friend doesn't answer me I know what he's thinking because it's the same thing we all have.

None of us would ever leave the others.

“We have to leave, we can't stay.They will find us.Let's head out the back and make a run to the car”

Nodding we try to move but sudden shots stop our every movement.

“What happened?” asks one of the strangers outside.

The answer doesn't take long to arrive.

Walkers.

Shit.

The situation seems to get worse moment by moment.

The men outside continue to argue until they come to the conclusion that their friends will definitely be in the bar and so a moment later their footsteps inexorably get closer.

Rick and I immediately point the gun at the door and when it opens Glenn rushes towards it, closing it, pressing his back against it.

Now they know we're here.

“Yo, is someone in there?Yo, if someone in there, we don't want no trouble.We’re just looking for our friends”

I shake my head vigorously at Rick.

We must remain silent and wait for them to go away.

If we engage in any kind of discussion with these people we already know how it will end.

And even if my hand trembles I already know that I will do what I have to do if necessary.

“We don't want no trouble.We're just looking for our friends.If something happened tell us.This place is crawling with corpses.If you can help us not get killed, I'd appreciate it” the man repeats once again.

Rick puts his hand to his forehead, fighting against himself, but in the end I can see the moment he gives in.

And then he speaks.

“They drew on us!” he screams.

The footsteps outside are getting closer again.

“Dave and Tony in there?Are they alive?”

No, they aren't.

Despite the darkness, my eyes immediately find the man lying on the floor.

The man I killed.

I killed a human being.

I close my eyes trying to ignore the turmoil stirring inside me.

I can't distract myself now, not now.

I will have time for this, now I have to focus on the present.

We need to get out of here and possibly do it alive.

“No” Rick replies.

Outside the voices are agitated, talking to each other.

Some want to leave while one of them doesn't.

“They drew on us!They give us no choice!I'm sure we've all lost enough people, done things we wish we didn't have to, but it's like that now.You know that.So let's just chalk this up to what it was.Wrong place, wrong-” Rick shouts again but without being able to finish because a hail of bullets hits us.

The windows above our heads shatter, forcing us to step back.

Rick quickly gets to his feet, shooting through the broken glass and telling us to run away.

I grab Hersel's arm and, remaining crouched, we follow Glenn towards the back.

Hersel and Glenn take cover behind the counter while I get stuck behind a column when a bullet whizzes past my ear, splintering the wall protecting me.

I'm panting heavily as I check the magazine of my gun, I only have four shots left.

The gunfire around us seems to stop so I lean forward trying to figure out where Rick is and if he's okay.

I find him loading his rifle.

“Hey!” he shouts outward.

“We all know this is not gonna end well!There's nothing in it for any of us!You guys just...just back off, no one else gets hurt!”

When no one answers Rick nods at me and I know my time has come.

Without wasting time I rush towards the back door and enter the back of the bar.

The old stairs creak under my boots, making my heartbeat skip a beat.

Trying to make as little noise as possible, I approach the door that would signal our salvation but the silhouette of a man appears from behind the glass and a moment later the door handle moves.

Instinctively I shoot, sending the glass shattering.

Three more bullets.

“Summer!Summer!” my friend's worried voice reaches me from the other side of the room.

Keeping the gun pointed at the door I assure them that I'm fine.

Nothing seems to be moving abroad.

Maybe I scared him and he ran away.

Or maybe you killed him.

You killed another human being.

A noise behind me makes me snap like a spring.

I turn around with the gun drawn in front of me and find Glenn with his hands raised.

Behind him Hersel.

Glenn moves my gun from in front of his face.

I exhale deeply.

“Shit, man.Sorry!Sorry!”

I close my eyes trying to calm down.

My goodness, I could have shot my friends!

“Rick wants me to try for the car”

I shake my head.

No.

No.

I can't let Glenn go out there.

“I'll go” I exclaim, ready to stop any protest from him.

I load my gun, trying to block out the two men's animated protests from my head.

I have three shots, I can do it.

I have to do it.

“Summer!”

“No, Glenn!We will talk about sex discrimination another time.I don't give a shit if you feel like a gentleman right now.You will stay here, protect Rick and Hersel.End of the story”

Before I can open the door I feel someone grab my wrist.

When I look at Glenn's face, his eyes are two hard and unreadable mirrors.

“Don't bullshit.Don't be the hero.You get the car and come back here.If things go to shit, run away.We'll find a way”

“Glenn…”

“Just…Just don't die, okay?”

“I won't” I promise him solemnly, leaving a quick peck on his cheek and disappearing out the door.

Outside at the moment everything seems to be quiet so I cautiously walk along the sidewalk that runs alongside the building but I don't have time to walk even ten steps before a shot rings out behind me.

I take cover against the wall and when I turn around another shot rings out in the air.

Glenn shot my attacker.

His chest rises and falls rapidly as with a shaking hand he lowers the rifle.

The man on the ground scream in pain and if we don't silence him he will immediately attract his friends but I can't stop now so I move forward hiding behind a dumpster.

After a few moments I hear Rick's voice.

“Summer?Are you hurt?”

“No.No.I'm good” I whisper.

The man reaches me crouching next to me.

“It's all right.The car's right there.We're almost home”

“Okay”

My voice is shaking, I try to clear my throat but to no avail.

That ball of anxiety and horror is still there weighing down my chest.

We're almost home.

Yeah.

I want to go home.

I want to see Carol again.

I want to see Daryl again.

Only at the thought of him my tears seem to return.

Because I need him.

Daryl was right.

As long as we are together everything will be fine.

Daryl will help me with my pain, he has already healed my soul once.

I'm sure he will do it again.

And again if I need it.

I just need him now.

I sniffle trying not to make too much noise.

Rick wraps his long fingers around my shoulder squeezing it hard.

“I'll take you home, little sis”

The shadow of an amused smile on his lips.

It's absurd how naturally he passed himself off as my brother to protect me.

“I know, big bro”

The man on the ground continues to scream in pain.

Too loudly.

Too fucking loudly.

“Let's go” he urges me but as soon as we get up other shots reach us forcing us to retrace our steps and hide.

Suddenly a car stops on the other side of the road and the man behind the wheel starts yelling that the place is quickly filling up with walkers and that it's best to go.

I lean forward a little to understand who he is talking to and I notice that on the roof of the building opposite there is a boy with a rifle, he must be just over twenty years old, who, invited by his friends, jumps from the roof and disappears from my sight.

Immediately afterwards an inhuman scream reaches us and the car skids off.

“Get Hersel and Glenn” Rick orders me, running towards the screams.

A group of walkers is approaching so shouting at my friends to follow me we run in the same direction as Rick.

The walkers don't follow us too busy devouring the man Glenn shot.

After a few moments the screaming stops.

Making sure the two men are following me I catch up with Rick.

When I arrived, the scene that appeared before me was terrifying.

The boy has impaled his leg on a metal spike, his screams make me shiver while his desperate crying only attracts other walkers.

“We have to go now!” Hersel shouts.

The boy cries even harder.

“I'm sorry, son.We have to go” Hersel murmurs with a heartbroken look towards the young man.

“No, no, don't leave me, please”

His plea tears my heart apart.

It's not his fault that he ended up in this mess.

Nowadays we are willing to do anything to survive, even joining a violent group.

I know something about it.

And in this moment I understand Rick's hesitation in wanting to help the boy and Hersel's determination in wanting to leave.

I can't choose and I can't take sides.

“We have to go!” Hersel reiterates as Rick shakes his head.

“We can't leave him here” replies the latter.

Glenn fidgets next to me.

“Rick, this guy was shooting at you!”

I am struck by his words.

“Glenn, he's just a boy”

But my friend doesn't even give me an answer.

Nervousness arises around us pitting us against each other.

“This place is crawling with walkers!” Glenn shouts while in the distance we can hear the walkers approaching.

Every minute is precious.

“Hersel, what chance do we have of saving him?” I ask the man, ignoring Glenn's almost betrayed look.

I know he is convinced that we are wasting precious time but too many people died today.

If we even have a chance of saving him we have to try.

“The fence went clean through.There's no way we can get the leg off in one piece.We're not gonna get that leg off without tearing the muscle to shreds.He certainly can't run.He may bleed out”

Shit!

Thing Summer, thing!

Meanwhile, Rick and Glenn tell the boy to be quiet, trying to calm his scream.

Then an idea.

“Hersel, can't we just take the leg off?”

At my question the boy begins to scream even louder.

I approach him pointing my gun at his face.

“Listen man, do you want to live?” I spit the words between my teeth, angrily.

I'm tired and out of control.

The boy is terrified by my crazy expression, so he whimpers and nods weakly.

“So shut the fuck up!Do you understand?”

With my eyes fixed on the boy I try to soften my gaze by trying to be at least a little kinder.

"It will all be fine.We won't leave you here just hang on, alright?”

He nods but his gaze remains haunted as Hersel lists the steps to take to amputate his leg.

The man takes off his shirt, knotting it as if it were a tourniquet around the boy's leg.

Rick joins me, pushing a hand against the boy's chest to force him to lie down.

Around us the grunts are getting closer and closer.

Glenn and I exchange a knowing look, splitting up to cover both sides.

He is the first to shoot and I follow closely but having only three bullets there is very little I can do.

“Rick!We have to move” I shout at him.

“I'm out of ammo.Glenn, how's it going?”

The delivery guy fires a couple more shots.

“I'm almost out of ammo” he replies.

Shit!

“Rick!”

I catch up with him while he and Hersel try to cut off the boy's leg.

“Hersel do it now!” Rick is yelling at him but the man shakes his head in defeat.

“There is no time” the vet replies.

Rick, after shooting a walker behind us, drops his rifle and, grabbing the boy's leg, forcefully removes it from the fence.

After an inhuman scream the boy faints.

Rick and Glenn put him in the car.

Hersel and I sit with him in the back seat periodically making sure he's breathing.

The journey continues in a surreal silence and when we reach the farm it is already morning.

I don't remember much about the return journey, it's as if my mind has turned off, excluding any sound, any word, anything that happened in the previous hours.

I feel numb, in my body and in my mind.

And it is with the same state of mind, with the same numbness, that I watch Rick and the others get out of the car.

The man hugs his son and his wife.

In their hasty and excited gestures I can see all the worry evaporate and be replaced by a love so immense, so tangible that it takes my breath away.

I see Maggie run to the car and throw her arms around Glenn's neck as Hersel instructs Patricia on what he needs and what she needs to prepare.

And I…

I sit next to Randall.

That's his name.

I watch his chest fall and rise slowly as small gasps leave his lips.

I look at my hands, placed in my lap, dirty with his blood.

The voices outside the cockpit are just confused murmurs but among them I can clearly hear heavy footsteps until the door on my side opens.

“Ya good?”

His voice unleashes a whirlwind of conflicting emotions within me.

When his fingers touch my chin I move away, turning my head the other way, focusing my gaze on the boy's mangled leg.

The blood continues to soak Hersel's once white shirt relentlessly.

“Summer?”

My name rolls from his lips wrapped in a spiral of worry but despite this I can't look him in the eyes.

I don't feel like myself and I don't want him to see me that way.

Daryl doesn't push any further, just crouches beside me waiting for me to be ready for him.

From the other side of the car someone approaches to take the boy away.

I don't have the strength to look who they are and after a few minutes they all disappeared inside the big house.

Everyone except me.

And Daryl.

The man doesn't let out a breath, he remains motionless at my side.

After minutes or hours I find the strength to speak again.

“You should reach the others” I murmur, lost of any emotion, of any feeling.

The words come out in such a soft whisper that I'm afraid he didn't hear me.

But I know that's not true.

The archer remains motionless at my side.

Not a breath, not a word.

I feel his eyes boring a hole into my face, even though I can't see him I feel his eyes on me.

I peek in his direction and it's just as I imagined.

His beautiful blue eyes are there, intently staring at me.

In his face there is not even a shadow of what I had imagined.

There is no anger, no disgust, oh no...in his eyes there is only so much concern but also so much relief at me coming back.

Come back to him.

And all this kills me.

I would have preferred for him to yell at me, for him to scold me for my recklessness, for disappearing without telling him anything.

I would have accepted anything but this.

Not this.

I feel like I don't deserve his gentle soul.

I look back at my hands, Randall's blood coagulated between my fingers.

The same fingers that pulled that trigger.

The same fingers that marked the end of a life.

I killed a human being.

With a sudden movement of my arm I push Daryl angrily, forcing him to stand up and make room for me while I get out of the car.

Shocked and without a specific destination, I walk away from the car and head towards the opposite side of the house.

The hill that leads towards the trees at the edge of the property extends in front of my eyes and so without having really decided my feet take me in that direction.

“Summer!” the archer grunts trying to reach me.

I snort, speeding up my pace.

Why can't he understand that I want to be alone?

His large hand grabs my wrist, forcing me to stop.

He stays behind me, granting me at least this.

I don't want to see his eyes and he understood this.

“Wha’ happened?”

“You should reach the others, Daryl”

My voice cracks as I say his name.

The same name that until a few minutes ago kept me away from my own demons now seems to push me further and further towards an abyss from which I can't see a way out.

“Wha’ happened, my sunshine?”

My heart skips a beat.

My sunshine.

He thinks about me as his.

And I want to be his.

But…but I feel so dirty…

I killed a human being.

“Wha’ happened?” he repeats but this time letting all his desperation towards my stubborn silence shine through his words.

What happened...

Happened that I love you and I feel like I don't deserve you.

Here's what happens.

But I will never tell him this.

Never.

Daryl Dixon is all I have and I will always protect him.

Even if it is from myself that I will have to protect him.

“Mind your fucking business, Dixon” I hiss angrily, yanking my hand from his grasp.

Daryl lets me go like he's burned himself and when I start to walk away I don't hear his footsteps following me.

I don't have the courage to turn around.

Because even though this is what I want, I can't handle the pain in his eyes.

I'm a monster.

Please share, comment and rate ❤️

🔥 Masterlist 🔥

Taglist ❤️

@deansapplepie @celtic-crossbow @daryldixmedown

[something-tofightfor]

Red, White and True

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Female Reader (Life is Good pairing)

Word Count: 9915

Rating: M. There’s some smutty parts, but nothing explicit. Lots and lots of feelings though.

Summary: Almost a year after you first met Frankie and his friends, you’ve decided to spend the 4th in Florida with him. 

Everything goes to plan - until it doesn’t - and you and Frankie are forced to adapt in real time. 

Author’s note: This was supposed to be a stupid short piece about you and Frankie watching fireworks together ... and here we are 10k later. 

I’ve really missed these two, and it was fantastic to get back to them. This references things from Life Is Good, but I guess you could read it as a standalone and just have zero context.... if you really wanted to. 

If you want to read that first: Life Is Good Masterlist

Thank you for reading!

“I’ve got something to tell you, and you’re not gonna like it.” Glancing up from where you were slicing fruit on a large cutting board, you eyed Frankie as he stepped into the sunny kitchen. What? I’m not going to like what? “That phone call was rom Evie. We’re going to have to change plans today because I need to pick up Elijah.” 

“What?” Fingers tightening around the knife handle, you tilted your head to one side. “Why? Is everything alright?” He set the phone down on the countertop and moved to stand next to you, reaching for one of the cut pieces of watermelon and lifting it to his lips. He’s not hysterical, so… “Frankie?”

“They were at her moms for the day, and I guess Estella had one drink too many and tripped.” He sighed. “She fell in the back yard and hurt her leg, so Evie’s gotta take her to the ER, and doesn’t want to have Elijah sitting in the waiting room with her for hours…” He trailed off, frowning. “So I’m sorry, but my 4th of July is now going to include keeping an eye on my kid, and -”

 “I hope she’s ok.” You went back to what you were doing, the knife slicing quickly through the remaining fruit. “I only need a couple more minutes to finish this, and then I have to change my shirt.” He stayed quiet, though, and you wondered what he was waiting for. Does he think I’m going to be mad? “Frankie, kid or not I’m still going to get to spend the day with you. And I was supposed to meet him later this week anyway, so moving things up a couple days is …” You shrugged. “Unexpected, but as long as Evie’s alright with it even though she hasn’t met me, it changes nothing.” 

Finishing with the watermelon, you grabbed for the container of already prepped fruit and put it under the lip of the counter. You used the blade to pull the chunks from the cutting board and in to mix with the others, juice dripping over the edge, too. He stayed quiet, though you could feel him shifting back and forth beside you. Are you really that worried? When Frankie mumbled your name a few seconds later, you turned your head to look in his direction. “Are you sure? You know the guys, you could always go by yourself and he and I can -”

“Francisco.” Setting the plastic bowl and the knife down, you turned to face him. “I’m positive. It wasn’t like we planned on getting wasted, right? We’re going over there for a cookout and to hang out. I haven’t seen them since December. All of them know Elijah.” You shrugged again. “You’re worrying too much.” 

He stared at you wordlessly and then nodded, reaching out and sliding a hand around your waist to pull you closer. “Alright. I told her I’d pick him up from the hospital, and the one they’re going to is only about fifteen minutes from here, so…” He wet his lips. “We can leave in about ten, if that works for you.” 

It would be cutting it close - and it meant that you couldn’t cut the pineapple into star shapes like you planned - but you knew it didn’t matter. “Yeah. Yeah, that works for me.” 

— 

As the two of you headed for the hospital, you let your thoughts wander. 

It was your second trip to Florida, and the fourth time you’d seen Frankie in person since you’d left Virginia Beach. He’d visited Colorado in fall and spring, and you’d gone to see him for a few days in winter. But in terms of the actual amount of time you’d spent together, your relationship was still new. 

Things had continued between you from the moment you’d gone your separate ways in Virginia. To your surprise, it had been just as intense with thousands of miles between you as it was with only a fence separating your vacation houses. 

Over video chat and lengthy phone calls, you’d gotten to know each other better, Frankie telling you more about his past and his personal life and you filling him in on the more mundane details of your life and career. 

It wasn’t a relationship like any you’d ever had before - and the distance wasn’t ideal, especially with as much as you liked Frankie. And as much as he seems to like me. You sighed, blinking twice as you reached for the volume knob on the radio. He spoke without taking his eyes off the road, Frankie reaching up to scratch at his cheek. “You like this song?” Yeah, and it’s too quiet in this truck.

“I do.” You didn’t know what else to say - or why Frankie’s mood had changed so much since getting the call, but there was a definite chill in the cab of his truck … and you didn’t like it. “Frankie I’m going to need you to tell me what’s going on here. What changed? Everything was fine this morning and  then Evie called, and -”

“This is what happens when you have a kid.” He sighed, bringing the truck to a stop at a red light. “Plans have to change and sometimes things don’t work out, and you always have to be ready to handle any kind of … thing that comes up.” He turned toward you, the sunglasses he wore obscuring his eyes, though you could imagine what the look in them was. “You don’t have kids, so you’re not used to it, and it doesn’t happen a lot with Elijah, but it will happen. And I don’t want you to get the idea that this is a one time thing, or -”

“Frankie, your son comes first.” You scoffed, cautiously reaching for him. “Always. And anyone that doesn’t think that it should be that way is wrong.” Laying your hand on his knee, you squeezed. “I won’t lie. I’ve never dated anyone with a kid before, and it’s going to take some getting used to to have a little boy around, but…” You sighed. “You told me about him first thing. I decided I wanted to get to know you. I knew this was coming. You might not have him all the time, but you’re a package deal. I know that.” 

You knew that he didn’t believe you - knew that he’d need to see you interact with Elijah more than once before he trusted that you weren’t just saying what you thought he wanted to hear. And it’ll take more than this trip. But that’s fine.  “If it’s too much for you, I need to know.” You were moving again, following the flow of traffic as you turned onto a different street. “And I need to know the truth, because no matter how much I like  you, he’s…”

“I know.” You squeezed his leg, nodding. “But you need to give me a chance, Frankie. Today caught us both by surprise, but it’s not fair for you to just assume that I won’t … that this kind of adapting isn’t going to be something I want.” 

He didn’t say anything else until a few minutes later when you pulled into the parking lot of the hospital. 

Frankie guided the truck into an empty spot close to the entrance, swearing under his breath at how packed the lot was. He turned the radio back down, fingers lingering on the knob. “You can stay in here, and I’ll go grab him. No reason for both of us to go into that madhouse.” He sighed. “This isn’t how I wanted you to meet him, and I -”

“Hey.” Shifting so that you could look at him, you reached up, cupping his cheek in one hand. “It’ll be fine. You can save the introduction until we get to Pope’s if you want, that way we won’t be meeting over the headrest of a car.” That got a tiny smile from him, Frankie nodding before rolling his neck out. 

“Won’t be long.” He leaned in, lips landing on your cheek. “Don’t go anywhere.” 

You laughed at that, assuring him that you wouldn’t. As soon as he was out of the truck, you reached for your phone, opening Instagram and beginning to scroll. Your friends were at celebrations of their own - Paige and Jordan hanging out together, Taylor spending time with her boyfriend’s family. You opened your group message and sent a quick text out to them - Happy 4th from Florida! Everyone be safe today and don’t do anything that’ll require Jordan’s medical assistance!  - before going back to your social media and thumbing at the screen. 

You understood Frankie’s hesitation. If you were being honest, it made you care more for him. There were plenty of men that would have been pissed that their plans had to change last minute. There were others that would have refused to pick their child up because it wasn’t their scheduled time. But Frankie hadn’t reacted either of those ways - and that said a lot. Because he loves his son. And he - 

A knock at the window startled you, your fingers closing around your phone as you turned your head toward the sound. Oh, shit. You weren’t able to stop your involuntary intake of breath, or the widening of your eyes at the sight of the woman standing just outside, but you hoped she’d understand. She’s gorgeous. 

You knew what Evie looked like. 

You’d seen pictures of her and Frankie and of her and Elijah in the year that you’d known the man. But seeing her standing in front of you was a different story. It didn’t shock you that even in the parking lot of a hospital’s emergency room, the woman looked put together and poised. With a pang of understanding, you got exactly what had drawn Frankie to her in the first place. 

Setting your phone down, you held up one finger and then reached over, unlocking the windows from Frankie’s side of the truck. Once that was done, you pushed the button to lower the glass on your side, reaching up to remove your sunglasses in the same motion. “Evie.” 

She paused before she said your name, one hand rising to grip the strap of the bag that was hanging over her shoulder. “Hi.” It was awkward - just about as awkward as any first meeting between you could have gone, and you didn’t know how to change that. 

“Do you want me to get out of the truck? I don’t… I wasn’t expecting to…” 

“No.” She actually smiled at your question, her head shaking back and forth. “This won’t take long, and I have to get back inside.” 

“I hope your mom’s alright.” You winced, nose wrinkling. “And that whatever she did when she fell doesn’t need surgery.” The woman rolled her eyes, taking a breath. 

“I’m sure she’s fine. She can still walk so I don’t think she broke her hip, but…” Evie looked back at you, nodding. “Thank you. Thank you for saying that.” The woman went silent then, eyeing you, but you didn’t see any of the things you’d expected to see from her in the expression. She just looks … nervous. “I loved him. I loved him very much, but I knew …” She sighed again, shaking her head. “I know it wasn’t going to be enough, and by the time Elijah was born, we both knew that we were better off as friends, even though we pretended that wasn’t the truth for a while.” 

“I… he told me …” You didn’t know what to say, and the woman’s honesty had taken you by surprise. “He said you were together for a few years, but that he wasn’t … he wasn’t his best self during those years, and … that it wasn’t fair to you.” Evie nodded, reaching out to settle one hand on the side of Frankie’s truck.

“It wasn’t fair to either of us, to be honest. But he had to change because he wanted to, not because I needed him to.” You took a breath at her admission, holding it when she continued. “Frankie deserves to find someone that will make him happy, and if that’s you, that’s great. The only thing I’m really worried about is my son. I would have preferred to talk with you for more than a few minutes before you met him, but …” She closed her eyes. “But Frankie’s known you for a year now, hasn’t had anything bad to say, and based on what I found when I looked at your profiles … I think it’s alright for you to hang out with my kid for a couple hours before you and I have an actual conversation.” Oh, that’s a relief. 

“Thank you for trusting me.” You curled your hand into a loose fist the bite of your nails into your palm keeping you focused., lips pressed together. “And I’ve told Frankie ever since he even brought up the idea of me meeting Elijah that I wanted to meet you first. I don’t have kids of my own, but I can imagine how nerve wracking it can be to let them spend time with someone you don’t know, especially when one of their parents is in a new relationship.” 

“A year isn’t new.” She laughed. “And from what he’s told me, you guys hit it off quick, so just because you haven’t been physically together that long doesn’t mean it’s any less a relationship.” She sighed, releasing a long breath. “He deserves to be happy. And if you make him happy, I’m not going to stop you from getting to know Elijah. But just … do me a favor, alright?” She put her other hand on the edge of the open window, locking eyes with you. “Don’t do what I did and try and force things to work out. Frankie’s really emotional, even though he doesn’t like to admit it, and he takes things hard. So if you’re not all the way in … don’t pretend to be. He deserves more than that.” 

“I…” You shivered, despite the warm air coming in through the window. She needs to know. “I’m in, Evie. I wouldn’t have agreed to meeting Elijah if I wasn’t. It’s a big deal to me, too.” She nodded twice and then smiled, pointing at the back seat. 

“I’m going to put his bag in there and then go inside. Frankie’s keeping my mom company right now, so I’m sure he’s ready to be done with that.” She opened the door and reached in, dropping the backpack onto the empty space next to the car seat. “Oh, fruit? Perfect. Elijah loves pineapple.” She straightened up, nodding at you one more time. “Give him some of that and you’ll be his best friend for the day.” 

Evie surprised you then by sticking her hand out, waiting for you to take it. As you shook, you tried to come up with something to say, but couldn’t. How do I follow that up? What do you say to the mother of your boyfriend’s child in the parking lot of a hospital? After a few seconds, you settled on something. “It was nice to meet you, but I wish it was under different circumstances. Maybe … maybe later this week, we can -”

“Oh, we can.” She grinned, her expression changing to one of amusement. “And we will.” 

She said goodbye and then turned back toward the building, leaving you alone once again. Holy shit that was … something. You rolled the window up and then stared straight ahead, trying to focus. That wasn’t what I expected. Not at all. 

You could tell that the woman still cared about Frankie, but unless she was an incredible actress, you hadn’t gotten any indication of jealousy or intent to sabotage when you’d talked. And that’s good. That’s good because - 

The back door of the truck opened, and when you turned to look, you watched as Frankie set a little boy down and into the car seat. “He’s sleeping.” The man’s voice was low. “Fell asleep while we were waiting, so hopefully he’ll stay that way til we get to Pope’s.” 

You watched in the rearview mirror as Frankie carefully buckled his son in, checking the straps twice before he was satisfied. He shut the door quietly and then circled around to the driver’s side, sliding back into the seat next to you. “All good?” You murmured the words, head turned toward him. Instead of answering, though, Frankie pulled the hat from his head and leaned in, his lips finding yours and lingering. 

“All good.” He kissed you again and then sat up, buckling his seatbelt. “You ready to see the guys?” A single nod was enough confirmation for him, and moments later, the two of you were heading back for the main road - Frankie’s fingers laced with yours, both hands resting on his thigh. 

— 

From the minute you got to the party  you were occupied. Frankie and Elijah got dragged off toward the inside of the house by Pope’s sister, while the man himself wrapped you in a hug and pulled you out and onto the back patio, one arm slung around your shoulders. 

You spent the first twenty minutes greeting the people that you hadn’t seen in months and getting introduced to some that you’d never met. Benny then pulled you away from Pope, leading you over to where the food and drinks were set up. There, you got roped into a conversation with Tom’s daughter and his ex, the shade of the overhead tent blocking out the sun so that none of you were squinting to shield your eyes. 

It felt good to be so accepted into an already established group of friends and family, but after a little while, you found that you missed Frankie. Tightening your grip on the can of seltzer that Ironhead had pushed into your hand, you excused yourself from the conversation and turned back toward the house. 

You were rewarded with the sight of Frankie stepping out through the patio door, the little boy once again supported by one of the man’s strong arms. Their prolonged absence made sense once you saw that both of them had changed - Frankie without his hat and wearing a pair of swim trunks that you recognized as Pope’s from the previous summer, and the little boy in a tiny pair of his own, along with a t-shirt that was covered in multicolored stars. 

Elijah was wearing Frankie’s aviators, the lenses dwarfing his rounded cheeks, and so you were able to catch the look in the man’s eyes when he caught your gaze. Oh, Frankie. You watched as his lips twitched and then he started to speak, tilting his head down to talk into the child’s ear. The arm he wasn’t using to support the boy’s weight rose, one finger pointed in your direction. 

When Elijah turned his head to look at you, the sunglasses slipped down his nose - and you couldn’t stop the laugh that poured out of your mouth at the sight. Oh, he looks just like him. You took a sip of your drink and then set the can down, taking a few cautious steps toward the pair as they moved closer to you. 

“Hey, you.” Frankie spoke first, the three of you meeting just off to the right of the patio and out of the way of most of the people that were walking around the yard. “Somebody woke up from their nap and wanted to come to the party.” 

“Yeah?” You smiled again, your gaze dropping from Frankie’s face to his son’s. “Well it’s a good party, so I’m not surprised. Hi, Elijah.” Frankie’s chuckle was full of warmth, and when the man cleared his throat, you knew what was coming next. Ok. Ok, this is … 

“Lij, this is daddy’s friend. Can you say hi?” There was no reason to be nervous - you were being introduced to an almost three year old that probably wouldn’t remember you the next time you visited Florida, but it was Frankie’s three year old - and you wanted him, at the very least, not to burst into tears at the sight of you. 

“Hi.” It was quiet and accompanied with a quick wave, but you watched as Frankie relaxed at the sound, his free hand rising to pull the sunglasses from the kid’s nose and place them back on his own face. You’d seen plenty of pictures, but seeing the two of them together made your chest tight. I need to see more baby pictures of Frankie. They look … wow. Elijah turned his chin up toward Frankie, the wide smile turning into a frown. “‘Wimming?” 

“Yeah, bud. We can go swimming.” Swimming? Where? There’s no pool. Frankie reached for you then, taking your hand and linking your fingers together as you crossed the yard and rounded the corner of the house. “Santi’s got a couple nieces and nephews so he has a kiddie pool set up over here.” 

There was a kiddie pool, but it was unlike anything you’d ever seen before. Inflated and only a few inches deep, it was divided into smaller sections. One had a sprinkler in the shape of a dinosaur, another featured a small slide and the third was just water, though there were a few pool toys floating in it. There were two other kids already splashing around, and the closer you got, the squirmier Elijah became until Frankie set him down. 

You watched as the little boy pulled his shirt off, dropping it onto the ground and then ran toward the inflatable, his laugh loud when he came into contact with the water for the first time. “Watch him for a second?” Frankie spoke into your ear, his lips hovering. “Gonna go grab a couple chairs.” 

You nodded, eyes on the pool where the three kids were calf-deep in water, and then Frankie was gone, leaving you alone with your thoughts. The other adults that were gathered around the pool were deep in conversation, though you saw them glance at the water every few seconds, making sure that their kids were safe and having fun. You tried to relax, too, smiling as Elijah plopped down and began swishing the water around with both hands. 

“He loves the damn water.” Frankie was behind you again, dragging a pair of chairs with one hand, the other carrying two unopened cans. “You should see him in my pool with his little floaties. He’s going to start lessons when he turns 3, but he won’t need ‘em for long.”

You took a seat, Frankie settling next to you and handing over one of the cans - the same thing you’d been drinking earlier - before cracking his open. “He looks just like you, Frankie. The pictures don’t … it’s uncanny.” He laughed, tipping his head back as he took a long drink. “But it’s good that he likes water. I’m sure there’s a lot to do down here that involves water.” 

“There is. Most of the kids I grew up with learned to swim real early. Lessons are a good way to make friends, too. I know he’s still young, but … never hurts, right?” You agreed, sipping from the can you held, the condensation running down and over your fingers. “I’m sorry about Evie. She basically told me that was happening whether I wanted it to or not, and -”

“Don’t apologize, she was nice. And I get it. She wanted to meet the woman that was going to be spending the afternoon with her son. I don’t blame her.” You shifted in your chair, turning your attention to him. “She didn’t scare me off, if that’s what you’re worried about.” 

“What about this? Does this scare you?” He gestured to the scene in front of you - Elijah holding a squishy ball in one hand and slapping it against the surface of the water while Pope’s relatives played nearby. “Because -” Tell him the truth.

“It does.” You swallowed hard, nodding. “It scares me, Frankie, but not away.” He frowned, the furrow of his brow deepening as he stared at you. “He’s not my son, but he’s yours. He’s a little guy, so right now, he needs a lot from you and his mom and the other adults in his life. And… as of today, I’m one of those adults, just like your other friends.” Well, not just like them, but … Bringing a hand up to grip the back of your neck, you nodded. “I won’t ever try and overstep, but if I’m around and you need help, I’m here.” You raised your can in a mock salute. “I have no idea what the hell I’m doing, but I’m here.” 

You took a long drink as he laughed, one of his large hands settling on your knee. “Nobody knows what they’re doing at first. I appreciate that, though.” Frankie gestured to the pool. “Pope’s niece Mia is only 4, and her brother Lucas is going to be 5. It’s nice to have a couple kids his age around when we come to things like this or do family shit.” 

He’d reiterated how close he and Pope were in the months you’d known him - explained that the Garcias considered Frankie family. I’m glad Elijah has that, too.  

“That’s how it was for me and Jordan.” You nodded, eyes drifting over the back yard and locking in on Pope, the man laughing with a small group of people and Tom near the grill. “Our parents were friends, so we’d always see each other at birthday and holiday parties and stuff. We sat next to each other in kindergarten and I had my first sleepover at her house when we were seven, and we never looked back.” He hummed in agreement, Frankie’s thumb moving slowly over the inside of your knee. “Mia’s gonna have mini versions of you and Pope looking out for her… I feel bad for any boys that try and get close.” 

“We’ve already talked about that, so you’re not the first to mention it.” Frankie leaned forward, gesturing at one of the women on the other side of the pool - Pope’s sister - with his can. “Lex and I were really close growing up, and when everything happened between me an’ Evie, she and her husband helped out a lot when I had no idea what I was doing.” He sighed. “Everyone helped, actually. And I don’t know what I would have done without -” 

“Daddy!” Your attention went to the pool, where Elijah was standing and staring at both of you, his arms held out. Frankie moved right away, leaning forward and setting the can on the ground between your chairs before he stood, walking to he pool and crouching down. 

You watched them for a few seconds, focused on the way his shoulders moved beneath the thin fabric of his tee shirt, muscles flexing as he reached forward and splashed the water with one hand. With the other, he pushed his sunglasses up to rest atop his head - and then Frankie went for the water with both hands, Elijah sitting back down and laughing as his father began to create small waves that rolled over his legs and against his belly. Why am I still sitting here? 

Pushing to your feet, you closed the distance between where you were sitting and the pool, kneeling next to Frankie and putting one hand on his back to let him know you were there. Here goes nothing. “This looks fun. Am I allowed to play with you?” Frankie’s head turned slightly toward you, and even over the sound of the party, you heard the sound of him whispering your name in surprise. “Do you want to play, Elijah?” 

There were a few tense seconds of waiting but then the little boy started laughing again, leaning closer and smacking the surface of the water to send a splash in your direction. Ok, this is a good start.

— 

An hour and a half later, the three of you were sitting at one of the tables with food in front of you. You’d delighted Elijah when you’d asked if he wanted pineapple with his lunch, Frankie looking on in surprise as his son enthusiastically agreed to the food you offered, the sticky juice dripping down his arm as he inhaled it before he even touched anything else. 

The little boy sat on Frankie’s lap as he ate, chowing down on chicken tenders and macaroni and cheese, and you were shocked at how easy it was to be around dad-Frankie after only really knowing him as the man you’d met him in Virginia. 

The guys came up and talked to you in turn, each of them sitting down and saying hello to Elijah first. He was enamored by Benny, the kid’s laughter turning into a shriek as the younger Miller plopped his hat down onto the tiny head, angling it back so that he could still see from beneath the brim. You laughed too, clearing your plate and Frankie’s to give them a chance to talk - and yourself a chance to take a breather as you headed inside of the house to use the bathroom. 

You gave yourself a few minutes to breathe, grabbing a bottle of water from the refrigerator and then leaning up against the counter to look out the window at the back yard. This is going well. It could be so much worse, and awkward, and - “There you are.” Frankie stepped behind you, winding both arms around your body and settling his chin on your shoulder. “Needed a break?” 

“Yeah.” You closed your eyes, melting into his hold. “Not from you, just from the heat. And the noise, I -” He urged you to turn around, hands staying at your waist. “Frankie?” 

“Are you having a good time?” He frowned, lower lip jutting out in a pout. “Did you eat enough? Do you need a drink?” You couldn’t help it - the laugh that you let out loud as you moved forward and rested your head against his chest, both hands going to his shoulders. 

“Frankie, yes. I’m fine. You don’t have to worry about me.” Leaning back so that you could meet his eyes, your smile widened. “Are you having a good time?” Instead of answering, Frankie nodded, tilting his head to the side and angling it to kiss you. “I’ll take this as a -” 

He cut you off mid-sentence, his lips soft against yours. You moved your arms to wind around his neck and Frankie pulled you closer in the same moment that he stepped forward, your lower back hitting the edge of the counter. “I’m glad you’re here.” He mumbled the words between kisses, running the tip of his nose alongside yours. “So goddamn glad you -”

“In my kitchen? Really, ‘Fish?” Peeking past Frankie, you saw Pope leaning in the doorway, both arms crossed over his chest. “And you’re right in front of the window, too.” The three of you burst out laughing, Frankie kissing you once more before he let go and turned to face his friend. “Your phone was ringing, by the way. You left it on the table.” Ah, shit. Frankie nodded, thanking Pope as he stepped away from you and then headed back outside, leaving you and the other man in the kitchen. 

“Food was great, Pope.” Clearing your throat, you crossed your arms, too. “Thank you for grilling.” 

“I do it every year.” He moved closer, hopping up to sit on the counter next to you. “‘Fish helps sometimes, but he didn’t want to leave you with Elijah ten minutes after you met him, so…” He sighed. “Tom was an acceptable substitute today.” You laughed at that, but didn’t know what else to say. I would have kept an eye on the kid, I just … he didn’t ask. “Are you guys coming to the fireworks?” Pope pushed off the counter and opened the fridge, reaching for a beer. “And do you want one of these?” 

You’d only had one full drink and the few sips of the first so you agreed, taking the cold bottle from him with a quiet thank you. “I’m not sure. He mentioned it the other day, but I don’t know what time bedtime is, so we’ll probably be back at Frankie’s pretty early.” You hadn’t even thought about it before then, but at the realization, it was difficult to keep from wincing. I haven’t had to think about a kid’s bedtime since … 

“We’re gonna head out on the boat around 7.” Pope looked down, checking his watch. “So a couple hours to figure it out.” Boat? What boat? “Oh, he didn’t tell you?” Pope’s grin widened, the man winking at you. “I hope you get to come.” Turning and heading out of the kitchen, he paused in the doorway again, looking over his shoulder and holding up one finger to accentuate his point. “Not in my kitchen, though.” 

That made you laugh, and when you stepped back out into the sunshine a few minutes later, you were still laughing, flipping a casual middle finger at Pope as you passed him. He blew you a kiss, unable to keep a straight face. When you finally reached Frankie again, the man sitting in one of the lawn chairs he’d pulled over by the pool earlier, you were smiling, though the laughter had subsisted. “Frankie? Wh -” 

He turned his head so that you could see that he was on the phone, and you immediately went quiet, lowering yourself into the chair next to him and searching for Elijah. The little boy was stacking blocks a few feet away, Lucas watching with interest. Mia was nowhere to be found, but both boys looked content enough and so you focused back on Frankie, chewing on the end of your thumb nail while you waited for him to hang up. “Alright. See you then.” 

Darkening the phone, he slipped it back into his shorts pocket, turning his attention to you. “Everything alright?” He stayed quiet for a few seconds and then nodded, his eyes moving to the boys and then back to you. 

“Estella tore her ACL. They just got the results of the MRI back, and they’re sending her home with some pain meds and a brace, but she’s going to need surgery in a couple weeks.” Ouch. “Evie’s gonna stay with her for the next few days, so she’s going to stop on the way back there and pack up bags for her and Elijah.” He ran a hand through his hair, dragging the curls away from his forehead. “I offered to keep him overnight, but she said no.” What? Why would she say no? 

“Why wouldn’t she want you to keep him?” He looked surprised at your question, Frankie’s mouth opening, though nothing came out. “I’m sure she doesn’t want to deal with someone that’s injured and a toddler at the same time, and we’re more than capable of -”

“She said she didn’t want to ruin your trip.”

“What the fuck?” It was your turn to let your mouth drop open, your head whipping back nd forth. “Frankie, it wouldn’t ruin a damn thing. We don’t have any plans for the rest of the week I’m here, and -” He shrugged, the smile back on his face. “If I wasn’t so happy with you, I’d be asking you why the hell you ever let her go.” 

“She’s a good person. Better than I am.” He sighed. “But it just wasn’t right between us. And all that matters now is that we keep getting along for him.” You understood that - and understood how lucky the little boy was to have two parents that were capable of co-parenting. “Honestly? I think she just wants him to be there, so your vacation is an excuse. She said she’d be settled in about an hour, so we’ll stay here for a little while longer and then we can take him back over there on our way to the marina.” 

Frankie glanced over at where the kids were, and your eyes followed. “OK.” There was nothing else to say - and so you kept it simple, nodding. “Will we have time to stop back at your house before we go? Because I had no idea there was a boat ride on the agenda, and I’ll need something to put on over this.” You gestured to your outfit, crossing your legs at the knee. “If not, I’m sure there’s a blanket or something in the back of your truck, but -”

“Yes.” Frankie reached for your hand, squeezing it. “We’ll have plenty of time.” 

— 

The drop off between Frankie and Evie had gone just as smoothly than picking Elijah up - Frankie carrying the once again sleeping child up the driveway and to the front door of a small but well-kept house. 

You’d watched from the passenger seat as he and the woman talked for a few minutes, both of Frankie’s arms wrapped around his son’s frame, the boy’s head resting against the front of the man’s shoulder. It was an endearing sight, but you still felt wrong watching them from afar - almost like you were intruding. 

So you averted your eyes, reaching for your phone again. There were a few messages from your friends - replies to your initial texts, pictures from the parties they’d been at, emoji replies to the picture of you and Frankie you’d sent earlier, the sun shining from behind you as you grinned at the camera and he stared straight at it, one eyebrow raised.

Heading out to watch fireworks now … apparently Pope bought a boat???? 

You didn’t know if anyone would respond, but it didn’t matter - the door opened again and Frankie climbed back in next to you, fastening his seatbelt. “Alright. You ready for my favorite part of the 4th?” 

“That party wasn’t your favorite part?” Turning your head to look at him, you watched as Frankie began to back the truck out of the driveway, his eyes focused on the mirror. “Also how the hell did you manage to forget to let me know Pope had a boat? Why didn’t he post about it? How did -”

“It’s kinda new.” He laughed, both shoulders rising and falling in a shrug. “And it’s not Pope’s boat, she’s all of ours.” Wait, what? “The five of us bought her a couple months ago. We’d been looking, and something came up. We jumped on it.” Frankie said your name, waiting for your hum of acknowledgement to continue. “Thought it’d be a good surprise.” 

You’d stopped questioning Frankie’s financial status after he’d explained parts of Colombia to you - telling you some of the details but leaving out the specifics of what had happened almost three years earlier. Yes, you wanted to ask questions, and you were almost certain that if you did, he’d answer them. But you believed Frankie when he told you that there were parts of his life he didn’t want to relive, or have you experience for the first time yet. Because he’s not proud of it, and that’s … alright. He’ll tell me when he was ready. There was plenty to learn - and plenty of time to do it. 

“We’ll see what kind of surprise it is when I see this boat, Francisco.” Letting his name roll off your tongue, you were unsurprised when he reached for your hand, curling his fingers around yours before lifting it to press his lips to your knuckles. 

“Oh, you’ll like it. I promise.” 

— 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” You and Frankie were walking hand in hand from where you’d parked and toward the dock, your eyes moving over the boats that were still moored. “These are all …” They were huge, and even the smallest boats that were in their places were much larger than you’d anticipated. These are million dollar boats. This is … “Frankie, you -”

“There she is.” He lifted a hand, pointing. “Not a helo, but still fun to drive.” The boat he was pointing at was absolutely beautiful, and even as someone with no knowledge of watercraft, you knew that much. 

You saw Pope standing on the back deck along with Will, and then, as you got closer, you were able to make out the name on the stern, both brows shooting up as you read it. “Over the Andes, Frankie? That’s an interesting name. Where did -”

He leaned in, lips moving against your ear. “Had to fly over the fuckin’ Andes to get the money home, so we figured it was a good name for her.” He punctuated the statement with a kiss to your cheek. “Lemme show you around.” 

You stepped on board, and were immediately overwhelmed as Frankie led you through the interior, pointing out the two bedrooms, the laundry area, bathrooms and kitchen. The front deck was spacious, too, with plenty of room for people to sit if they chose to, and even more space to stretch out and lay in the sun. He followed you up the staircase to the flybridge, gesturing for you to take a seat on the long couch before sliding in next to you, an arm around your back. 

“Well? What do you think?” He was barely concealing a grin, the bay breeze tousling his hair where it stuck out from beneath the hat he’d put back on. “Is this a good surprise, or -”

“It’s beautiful. It’s huge, though. How many people can fit on here?” He thought for a few seconds, using his fingers to count. 

“Most we’ve ever had on here was … sixteen? The five of us, Tom’s family, Pope’s sister and husband and the kids, the girl Will was dating, and a couple of Benny’s friends. He sniffed. “We invited people for today, but they all had plans, so…” He shrugged. “Their loss.” 

You hummed in agreement but didn’t get a chance to say anything before Pope’s head popped up from the stairwell, his smile growing. “That’s where you two went.” He climbed into the seat, spinning it to face you. “You have no idea how bad he wanted to tell you when we bought this.” Pope scratched his head. “Fish barely spends money on anything fun that isn’t his house, but I think he’s pretty happy with himself for finding this beauty.” 

“I am.” Frankie nodded. “We almost ready?” 

“You two are the last to board, so yeah. Ironhead’s getting us ready to cast off.” Pope leaned back, looking down through the opening of the staircase. “Couple minutes.” Pope stood then, looking at the two of you. “I’m gonna go grab a beer, you guys need anything?” 

“Sure.” Frankie cleared his throat. “I’ll take one.” You said you would, too, and then Pope was gone, disappearing back onto the lower deck and leaving you and the other man alone. “I’d just like to point out that I do spend money on things. Just not … like this.” 

“I get it.” Leaning closer, you closed your eyes and inhaled the scent of him - sun and sunscreen and the faint scent of his cologne. “Flaunting the fact that you have money is … not attractive.” 

“Yeah, I’m trying to be subtle about it.” He tightened his arm, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. “That’s why my truck’s not brand new and my house is just … normal and -”

“And you have no issue drinking cheap beer or ordering takeout or keeping a well-worn hat long past when most people would have gotten rid of it.” Tweaking the bill with two fingers you gave him a lopsided smile. “All the things I like about you.” 

“Goddamn, I’m glad I met you.” Frankie closed the distance between you again, his kiss hard. “You have no idea.” No, I think I do. Pulling the hat off of his head and tossing it to the side, you ran your fingers through his hair, eyes moving over his face. I’ll never get tired of this. “You don’t get seasick, do you?”

“Not that I know of.” Laughing, you relaxed against the back cushion. “How far out are we going?” 

“Couple miles. We’re staying in the Bay, but if you head out toward the center of it, you have a perfect view of both sides … and all the fireworks that go with it.” Oh. Oh, that makes sense. “We’ve rented a couple times before but … this is the first year we’ve got our boat.” 

“Well…” You pointed at the horizon. “Thank you for wanting me to be here for her maiden July 4th voyage.” Frankie kissed you again in reply, the tip of his tongue dragging over your lower lip. Finally. He hasn’t kissed me like this all day, and I’ve just … You turned toward him, both hands rising so that you could touch his face and the nape of his neck, one of Frankie’s hands flat against your back. 

But it was you that pulled back first, your hand dropping so that your could press your fingertips against his lips. “Wh-”

“I don’t want to get yelled at by Pope again.” Teeth digging into your lower lip, you paused. “I’m pretty sure if that man walks in on us kissing a second time, he’s gonna throw one of us overboard.” Frankie laughed at that, the man tilting his head back. But he didn’t disagree. 

“Plenty of time for that later tonight.” Frankie hummed, his eyes meeting yours. “And he won’t be  there to cockblock.” No, he won’t be. 

“Alright, you guys ready to go?” Santiago appeared again a few minutes later, a small cooler slung over one arm. “Gives us plenty of time to get a good spot.” Frankie stood, reaching for the cooler, which he handed to you - and then took a seat behind the wheel, flipping on screens and pushing switches. Pope sat next to him and you handed out the cans, both men cracking theirs open and taking long drags. 

Oh, Frankie’s going to … ok. Ok, I can… You sat straight up and watched the change come over him, Frankie’s shoulders straightening and his hands moving smoothly over the screens and controls until he was satisfied. You felt a slight thrum beneath your feet as he started the engine, but all you could focus on was the way the man’s hands looked as they gripped the wheel and shifter, Frankie’s eyes moving over everything as he did his pre-checks. 

“We good, Pope?” The second man agreed, calling down to Will. Moments later, you felt a shudder as you began to drift away from the dock, the current carrying you a safe distance. But that didn’t last long, Frankie easing the boat into reverse and watching the screens in front of him, the images  from the backup cameras projected there. 

Within a few minutes, you were sailing forward and toward open water - but instead of watching the view ahead of you, you were still focused on Frankie. 

Who wouldn’t be? He looked more at home behind the wheel of the boat than you’d ever seen him while driving anything else, and at the thought that the boat still wasn’t anything like a helicopter, you shivered. I’m going to lose my mind when I see him flying. 

After a couple more minutes of watching the way his fingers curved around the wheel and the tendons in his forearms flexed as he moved them, you tore your eyes away and looked at the water. Enough. You twisted on the seat so that you could rest your chin atop the arm that was laid across the back of the cushion. Some of the other passengers were sitting on the front deck - including Tom’s daughter, and your eyes wandered over them as you moved further away from land. 

“Hey, ‘Fish.” Pope’s voice rose above the sound of the water and the motor, and even though you didn’t turn, you still listened, waiting to hear what he was going to say. “Let me take over. Go sit with your girl.” You warmed at his words, pressing your lips together and closing your eyes, waiting. 

You didn’t wait long. 

Frankie took a seat behind you and then pulled you back and closer to his chest, tucking both of you into the corner of the L-shaped seat, his feet on the ground and your legs stretched out in front of you. You caught the smirk on Santi’s face before he turned his attention entirely back to the water, and for a few seconds you watched him steer, too, the curl of his fingers looser than Frankie’s had been - but no less attractive. 

“Relax.” Frankie spoke into your ear, his voice low. “We’ve gotta go slow because there are so many boats out today, so it’ll be about 45 minutes til we get to where we’re going. Get comfortable.” With a hum, you closed your eyes, turning your cheek toward his chest as Frankie’s arms wound tighter around you. I can do that. 

You didn’t quite fall asleep before you stopped moving, but it was close. The steady rise and fall of the man’s chest and the glide of the boat through the water lulled you into a more relaxed state than you could remember ever being in before. You heard him talking to Pope, the two of them laughing every now and then, but Frankie never let go of you, one arm around your waist, the other loosely slung over the upper portion of your chest. 

Colorado hadn’t ever felt further away than it did when you felt Pope cut the motor, the motion of the boat slowing so that the only thing moving you was the current. Opening your eyes, you took a deep breath in through your nose, immediately soothed by the sound of Frankie’s voice in your ear. “We’re here. Anchored an’ everything.” Already? 

Sitting straight up and stretching, you felt Frankie’s hands slide away from your body, the man groaning as he straightened up, too. “Where are we?” 

“St. Petersburg is that way.” Pope pointed, nodding his chin. “Tampa is that way, and Ruskin’s over there.” He grinned. “We’re in the middle of it all.” You decided to take his word for it, the faint outline of the shore visible in all directions if you squinted. “You two can stay up here if you want, but it’s a much better view from the lower deck.” Pope stood, reaching for his beer can. “Remember, there are other people on this boat right now, and one of ‘em’s a teenager, so -”

“I swear to God Santiago, if you say another word you’re going into the goddamn water.” Frankie’s growl made you laugh, one hand rising to cover your mouth as your eyes widened. “We’ll be down in a minute.” Pope caught your eye and winked, but didn’t say anything else before he disappeared, leaving you and Frankie alone again. “It’s crowded this year.” Frankie sighed, calling your attention back to him. “Lots of boats out here doing the same thing.” 

“It must be a good idea, then.” Spinning back to face him, you didn’t hesitate before swinging one leg over both of his to straddle his lap. Both of his brows shot up, but Frankie’s hands moved immediately to your hips, his lips curving upward into a sly smile. “You have a lot of good ideas.” 

“Do I?” He grinned, the tip of his tongue visible for a few brief moments as he wet his lips. “I think I’m about to have another one.” Your laugh was halted by the press of his mouth to yours, Frankie taking advantage of your parted lips to slip his tongue between them. He tightened his hold on your hips, one of your hands gripping his cotton-covered shoulder while the other fisted the curls at the back of his head. 

You were overwhelmed - by him, by the scent of the saltwater on the breeze, by the sounds of the music and people conversing below you, by the gentle rock of the boat on the surface of the water - but you liked it. Because I like him. Because I love it here, because I … Breaking away from Frankie with a gasp, you felt the air leave your lungs in a rush. 

His brows knit together as the man opened his mouth to ask you what was wrong. Nothing. Nothing’s wrong and everything’s right and … You didn’t let him, instead leaning in and kissing him again. The grip on his hair loosened as you stroked over the curve of his skull, your other hand moving slowly from his shoulder to the side of his neck. Frankie hummed, both hands sliding up your sides beneath your shirt so that he could rest his palms against your bare skin. 

You knew that he could feel the pounding of your heart, and when he shifted his hips beneath you, the slowly-growing bulge beneath the material of his shorts dragging along your core, you didn’t pull away. Instead, you pulled him closer, widening the spread of your legs so that you could feel him. I don’t just need him, I want him and I … 

The two of you were moments away from taking things too far in the open with an audience only a few feet away, so you weren’t surprised when he eased away from you, the man’s lips dragging over the corner of your mouth and then to your ear as you switched from kissing him to hugging him fiercely, face buried against the side of his neck.

There’s so much I want to say. Should I? Do I risk it? Do I tell him? 

It had been a year since you’d met - and in that year, there’d been hundreds of hours of conversation, thousands of messages sent back and forth - multiple visits between you that had not only solidified your feelings, but intensified them, too. And as you sat there, wrapped in his arms with the tips of his fingers dragging up and down the length of your spine, you had a feeling that things were the same for him. 

“Frankie?” You raised your head, steadying yourself and taking a breath. The sun was beginning to set behind him, the sky turning from blue to varied shades of gold and orange, the edges of the clouds on the horizon glowing. But you barely noticed, instead focused on the way Frankie looked at you - the man’s eyes locked with yours, the warmth in their depths almost tangible. 

His lips were parted, the full lower one begging to be kissed - but you held back, giving him a minute shake of your head. That turned into a slow nod, the spread of your fingers widening as they tangled in the soft locks of his hair. He said your name, tilting his head slightly to the side, but after that, Frankie just waited, giving you the time you needed to process your thoughts. 

Like he always does. Like he always has. “Frankie, I lo -” 

You were interrupted by the sound of an explosion from overhead, Frankie’s hold on you tightening as both of you craned your necks up and toward the sky where the smoky remnants of a firework lingered. Of course. Of course it … “It’s still light out.” He groaned, shaking his head as he closed his eyes. “Idiots.” 

That made you laugh, the tension in your chest releasing as the moment was broken. Maybe it’s for the best. “Guess that’s our cue to go down with everyone else, hmm?” He paused, meeting your eyes again in question, but then nodded after a few seconds, squeezing your hips before he let go. 

You stood on shaky legs, tugging the ends of your shorts back into place before you straightened your tee shirt. There’s always later. There’s … plenty of time. He called out your name and you turned to see the man holding out the thin hoodie you’d picked up on your way to the marina. “Thank you.” Taking it, you pulled it over your head and into place, going silent. Later. I’ll tell him later. 

“You were saying something?” He interrupted your thoughts, the man raking his fingers through his hair. “When we were sitting?” I was, but … 

“I’ll tell you later.” Wrinkling your nose, you gestured to the steps. “Let’s go back downstairs.” 

— 

Just under 40 minutes later, you were all on the lower level of the boat, split into smaller groups. You and Frankie had been talking with Will and Benny on the stern deck, but as the sky steadily darkened, Frankie took your hand and tugged you away from the other men, leading you the few feet to the step down and onto the swim platform. “What are we -”

“Figured we’d sit back here by ourselves.” Frankie slipped his shoes off and then lowered himself into a seated position, staring up at you. “Best view on the boat.” You had to agree, even though it was starting to get really dark, the only lights the few inside the cabin and the faint glow from the shoreline. You took your shoes off and sunk down next to him, Frankie’s arm automatically winding around your waist and urging you closer. “I’d tell you to dangle your feet if you wanted because the water’s warm, but there’s sharks, and I really don’t want to have to jump in and -”

“Are you serious?” Your entire body tensed as you prepared to move further from the edge of the platform - despite the fact that your feet were nowhere near the water. “Should we even be -”

“I’m just kidding.” He squeezed your side, laughing. “I mean there are sharks, but you could probably put your feet in if you wanted.” 

“Asshole.” You rubbed at your forehead. “You can’t make jokes like that, I come from a place where the largest body of water is part of a river, and -” He laughed, the sound snatched away by the breeze and carrying over the water, but it only took a few seconds for him to stop, Frankie taking a deep breath before saying your name quietly. 

When you looked over, you saw that he was already watching you, the expression on his face serious. But it softened almost immediately, a flash of his teeth visible as he smiled. “That … thing you were gonna tell me earlier?” Your heart rate sped up, but you nodded, the fingers you had resting on his thigh curling inward and crushing the fabric of his shorts between them. “I love you, too.” 

Your breath caught in your throat at his words, but you could see him visibly relaxing as he spoke, the man’s posture loosening though he made no move to pull his arm away. “You do?” He nodded, one side of his mouth lifting in a smile. “Good.” 

You closed the distance between you and kissed him, Frankie’s free hand rising to settle against the hinge of your jaw. It stayed there even when you parted to take a breath, the first loud booms of the fireworks displays beginning to echo over the water and in the air around you. “Good?”

Nodding, you licked your lips slowly, unwilling to look away. “Yeah, Frankie. That’s really good.” 

---

** Link to the boat I used for reference on the Masterlist page

Tag list coming soon! 

[desolationblvd]

MY GRANDMOTHER AND I WATCH THE BAD SEED

It's that awful place and that evil woman. My mother.

My sisters are beautiful and I am plain. Where did you get that one? Where did you get that one? Où as-tu trouvé celui-là? The nuns don’t like me they force things down my throat, words and flies, they strike me. Here comes the Mother Superior that’s what she thinks of herself and I hate her I hate her I hate her. You stole that-, and when she goes to strike me I throw up my hands I do not let her touch me I tell her the Pope is a criminal. She is furious she hates me but I hate her more. I have one friend we go to California I become a nurse she smokes every evening and I smoke like a chimney. I meet men I meet millionaires they want to marry me they slip through my fingers. I meet a man I get married we move across the ocean we have a daughter we move back. We have a son we have a daughter we have two more daughters we have five children and all of them are Catholic. I do not let them lift a hand I do not let them clean I do not let them cook I do not speak to them in my language they are my all-American darlings. I quit smoking. I think that I hate Catholics. My oldest daughter wants to do laundry and I cannot explain to her why she is not allowed my son is a boy just like all boys are my second daughter is quiet and shy and I cannot figure out why: I go upstairs in the night I drown her in cold water like a murder like a baptism. My third daughter is too smart for her own good and my fourth is a demon. My children are marionettes they spit on her when I say so and tears stream down their faces I know what I need to do or they won’t turn out right. Lucifer my youngest hates me wants to kill me I cannot throw her out. I watch them on the patio they skate circles around the little radio they dance they fall they scrape their knees. I wonder if I’ve done good.

I can hear my mother's voice…calling to me from the distance, and I don't answer her because I'm afraid.

I meet a man I’m wearing my glasses and my plaid skirt I ask him for a cigarette we get married. I’m late to our wedding it’s raining I’m beautiful I know I’m beautiful he’s happy I’m laughing someone takes a picture of me laughing. We have a daughter we go to my mother’s house we live in my sister’s old bedroom. We get an apartment my father lived there years ago we don’t know about that until later maybe it’s fate we have a son and we give him his father’s name his grandfather’s name his great-grandfather’s name. My daughter is shy it makes sense I was shy she doesn’t talk to people her own age she lives in her own world. She asks about death I say there’s nothing I say we don’t know I say nobody has come back to tell us about it yet I say people who kill themselves will not get into Heaven. She doesn’t like change. Mom I want to live with you for ever and ever.

Oh, I've got the prettiest mother. I've got the nicest mother. That's what I tell everybody. I say I've got the sweetest mother in the world. My son is sickly my son has stomachaches like my daughter did neither of them are athletic my daughter is shy and my son is sickly I worry it came from me. My daughter won’t sing but I hear her singing in her room I tell her it sounds nice and after that I don’t hear her sing anymore. Her friends make her hate me I ask what her problem is she thinks that I’ve wronged her resents me. She doesn’t want to be like me I ask her questions I say why don’t you shave your legs why do you dress like that I worry that she’s a dyke. She wants to die I wonder if I should let her die I think she’s secretly a cutter I make her take off her shirt she never forgives me. She’s stubborn she won’t talk to me I find pills in her room I find alcohol I wonder if I should let her die I remember people who kill themselves don’t go to heaven my husband yells at me because I’ve hurt him. My son is dyslexic he’s antisocial he’s picked up all my daughter’s bad habits there’s hope for him but I don’t know where to find it. It’s worse than I thought my daughter’s a dyke she wants to cut off her tits fuck my entire life I don’t know what I did to make her like this she’s moving too far away for me to reach her I don’t know what I ever did to deserve this.

So sleep well…and dream well, my only child and the one I love. I shall sleep too.

[sublimecatgalaxy]

I NEED A PART TWO TO THIS

This was such a weird thing to write a part 2 for because it's a Holiday oneshot and it's not the holiday's anymore BUT I think I did alright with it :) thank you for the love!

"Spence! You've finally joined us!" Penelope cheers beside me, lifting her arm from over my shoulder to shove herself in Reid's direction, tossing her arms around him. I giggle at the pained smile that spreads across his lips and he sends me a small 'help' under his breath.

I just take another sip of my drink and shrug my shoulders at him to which he rolls his eyes. There's quiet conversations around us with tasteful music playing in the background and Spencer slides down beside me, his arm naturally stretching behind me on the bench. I fight the urge to settle in the crook of his side even though it's so inviting.

"Got any fun facts for me?" I ask, nudging him playfully as he peers down at me through soft eyes, a surprised smile stretching across his lips as he adjusts himself better to look down at me clearer.

"Uh," he pauses, eyes moving in a triangular pattern between my eyes and lips and I try my best to ignore it and blame it on the drinks, "did you know that nearly 50% of people are more likely to engage in sexual acts outside of their normal acts during the holidays?"

"Why's that?" I ask, trying to not faint just at the mention of sex out of Spencer's mouth, he's typically so appropriate and bashful whenever anyone mentions sex.

"I read that it has to do with different role play opportunities and the gifting of toys." His eyes are completely focused on the party around us but his words are more than directed at me and my jaw drops, realizing that this is his way of flirting with me in a very cute, academic way.

"And why do you know this?" I tease, my tone finally forcing his eyes back down to me as a light blush tints his cheeks.

"Why do I know anything of what I know?" He asks with a small bashful chuckle, hand reaching up to run through his hair and I try to avoid looking at the strain of his biceps against his shirt. Prison really did him a number, didn't it? "Didn't I owe you a dance?" He asks suddenly, his spine straightening and I feel my brows lift without my permission, taken back up his sudden offer.

"Are you offering?"

"Anything to get away from Penelope's prying eyes." He mutters under his breath before giving me a gentle nudge in the opposite direction, my eyes meeting Penelope's almost immediately and she sends us a small, wholesome flutter of her fingers.

"Come with me, loverboy." I whisper, taking Spencer's hand in mine before yanking him away from the party with a giggle, not letting go of his hand as we make our way further and further away from our friends.

He doesn't let go either.

As soon as we round the corner into the empty hallway, Spencer pulls me back into him, hand sweeping around my back as I pause for a moment before placing my hands on his shoulders, looking up at him with a shocked look.

There's no music, nothing keeping our beat except for Spencer's gentle sways back and forth and I begin to feel overwhelmed with excitement at the chance of being this close to him.

"This is pretty romantic." I whisper with a teasing grin, watching Spencer's eyes widen briefly, a nervous look passing across his expression. I rub his shoulders gently, trying to remind him that it's just me and that he doesn't have to panic because I'm teasing him.

"I used to dance on my moms feet." He explains through a stuttered, strained voice and I can hear the crack in his tone as he avoids my eyes. I try my best to keep my cool as best as possible because there needs to be one of us who's got it together and has something resembling 'game'. Neither of us do though and that's what brings us together.

"That's adorable."

"So are you." He whispers, eyes finally meeting mine and my jaw drops, a small scoffed laugh escaping me as I feel my body warm under his touch. His hands seem to solidify finally on my hips, thumbs brushing briefly beneath my t-shirt at my bare skin. "Sorry, that just, uh, came out." He stutters with a laugh, head dipping so he can possibly avoid me seeing the cutest, nervous look pass through his expression.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- Taglist: @bubblebuttwade @rafelover2405 @leslienjazzy @sorceresss @grxnde-dwt @alex–awesome–22 @bunnietoof @niyamar1e @serialghost @plantlungs @geniusohn @akaliltimmytim @lilaalouuxx @xshariex @elliotsbeigeguitar @elle4404 @lelieja @srhxpci @joselyn001 @taysirene @spinkspanther @thedivineuphoria @peter-maximoffs @tsukishimawhore @poohkie90 @szlaco @distantsighs @nstyles4299 @wolflover384 @givemefoodandlovesstuff @vane28282 @yeswhatever33 @amirrahfranson @vvaalleennttiinna @f-mu @yaspillz @jeyramarie @skylievin@abbybarnes17 @jointherebellion215 @visiondaddy @steezysimfinds @its-ya-gay-boi-luigi @crunchytoenailsyum@glizzymcguirex @beth123lg @melovesmut @rafecameronswhore @ariianelle @write-from-the heart @vampviolets@haylee-e @honee-chai-tea @lokiandbuckywife

@officiallyunofficialperson@heyaitsklaudia@rosepetalsparks @bluetreecloud20 @scenesofobx @double-shot-of-tequila @1dluver13xx @colbysbrocks @iamasimpingh0e @loveshineslikethesky @id-3-kbro @diorsitgirl @errorfound101-allideasburnedout @neverwillknowme18 @ellyskey @taylors-folk @loversjoy @myaloveee @thyris-is @lagataprrr @aaaaslaaaan @witxhy-lexx @minjix @luvroseee @tee-swizzle @savageneversaw @admiringlove @hysteriahall @piceous21 @starlightandfairies @igotmajordaddyissues @drewstarkey-wife1 @manyfandomsfanvergent @revesephemeres

[currentlyfckingurmom]

Her Song part 28

"The fuck you mean you're taking my kid?"

"Oh relax, Syd and I are just gonna have a fun day together so you and the Brit can have some alone time," Ash wiggles her eyebrows.

"No. Nuh-uh. Absolutely not."

"Why not? You can't tell me you don't wanna have sex with her. 'Cause if not, then I'll gladly shoot my shot."

"Shut up, of course I want to. God, I'm dying to," I groan, then clear my throat to alleviate the awkwardness of my confession. "Syd is still sick. What if something happens? Or she gets too tired? Ash, I just don't think this is the best idea-"

"Look, I get it. You haven't left Syd's side since this all started. You're in 'protective mama bear' mode, as you should be. But you can trust me, Y/N, and you know that," Ash assures me.

"Yeah, I know," I mumble. "Fine," I groan, "but call me if anything goes wrong."

"Nothing is gonna go wrong." She walks further into the apartment in search of Syd. "My child! Come hither! We are going on an adventure!" she yells in a nasally voice.

"Ash!" Syd yells as she comes running. Ash picks Syd up and winks at me. Florence emerges from the bathroom and looks between Ash and I with a raised brow. I just shrug with a sheepish smile.

"Say bye to your mom," Ash says.

"Bye, Momma. I'll see you tonight."

"Or tomorrow, we'll see," Ash interjects with a smirk.

"Bye, Syd. Take it easy and tell Ash if you need a break, okay?"

"I will." I kiss her forehead and then they leave.

"What was that about?" Florence asks, sitting on the arm of the couch.

"Um," I blush, "Ash is taking Syd for the day because she wanted to, um, well- she wanted to give us some alone time." I look up at the ceiling to avoid eye contact, a furious red spreading to the tips of my ears. I hear Florence stand up and come closer. She grabs my chin and forces me to meet her eyes.

"And is that what you want, darling?" she asks lowly. I nod, swallowing thickly. "Use your words."

"Yes, Florence. Fuck, I want you," I whisper.

"Then take me." My heart jumps in my chest. I freeze looking into those lust-blown, jet black pupils. I've had sex before. Countless times. I know lust. But I've never wanted someone like this before. The need to make every part of her mine.

When our lips connect, something electric swarms dangerously in my stomach. Her lips mold over mine as my hands trail up her sides, lifting her shirt over her head. Impatient. She takes my tongue into her mouth as I back her up to the couch until we fall clumsily onto it. One of her legs wraps around my waist and I squeeze her thigh as I trail open-mouthed kisses down her neck.

I suck harshly on her pulse point, biting the hot skin and soothing the mark with a flattened tongue. A strangled moan stumbles from Florence's kiss-swollen lips. Impatient. She fumbles with my shirt, my pants, anything. "Take them off. Why won't they fucking come off?" she mumbles, trying to pop open the buttons of my jeans.

I peck her lips softly before I pull my shirt over my head, tossing it carelessly to the side. As I do so, she unbuttons and unzips my jeans. I laugh breathily at her determined, eager facial expression and grab her face, bringing her lips to mine in a much slower kiss, though just as passionate.

It feels good. It feels new. It feels like love.

I unclip her black bra, tossing it to the side without a care. I duck my head down to her chest, lightly scraping my teeth over a stiff nipple, then swirling my tongue around it. I twist the other between my thumb and index finger, before switching to give them equal attention.

She groans shakily, trying to push my head lower. "Stop being a fucking tease, Y/N."

I kiss up the valley of her breasts. "Beg," I whisper in her ear.

"Fuck you," she mumbles.

"You can do that later. Right now this is all about you. I'll give you what you want if you ask nicely, Florence. You know what I wanna hear."

She glares at me, but it's hard to take her serious when her pupils are almost completely overshadowing the green of her irises. I raise a brow, moving one knee and pushing against her center.

Her eyes squeeze shut as her head falls back against the couch cushion. I abruptly ease up all the pressure and her eyes snap back open. "Fuck, please. Please just fuck me already," she whines.

I tap her waist, silently telling her to raise her hips, and I slide the loose blue jeans off her legs, leaving her black thong as the only thing covering her. She watches me eagerly as my fingers skim down her body, leaving goosebumps in their wake. My hand reaches her hips and I press a soft kiss there before lowering my hand down and pressing firmly against her clothed pussy.

She breathes in sharply and I smirk, slowly moving my fingers back and forth across her damp panties. "Fuck, Flo, you're soaked," I groan, looking at the wet spot on the outside of her underwear. "What's got you so worked up, hm?" I ask condescendingly, never stopping my slow movements.

"Jesus, baby, please. I need more, I need you. Please," Florence pants rapidly.

"Well, I did say if you asked nicely..." I trail off, abruptly pushing her underwear to the side and pushing two fingers into her. We moan at the same time, my eyes fluttering closed at the feel of her silky arousal coating my fingers. I pump into her deliberately, with each thrust hitting a spongy spot that has her moaning and mumbling incoherently.

I leave bright marks all over her chest and neck as I work to bring her closer to the edge. I can feel my own arousal soaking through my underwear, just from the sight of her. Her walls begin to flutter and clench around my fingers, making it harder for me to move them inside her.

Her face scrunches up and her legs try to close around my body, but I don't let them. "I'm close- I'm gonna, fuck..." Just before she reaches the peak, I draw my fingers away and smirk at the shock and anger on her face. "What the fuck? You are so mean."

"You might not think so in a minute," I respond cheekily. I bring my fingers to my mouth, enjoying the taste I've missed so much these past few days. I hum lowly before releasing my fingers with a pop. Florence watches with wide eyes, waiting to see what I have planned for her. "Breathe, baby. Remember to breathe," I instruct, placing a kiss on her thigh. She takes a shaky breath and I slide her underwear off her legs.

The sight of this woman completely naked before me does unimaginable things to me, and it's all I can do to not give in and do whatever she wants me to. I lean down, my breath fanning lightly over her pussy, and blow on her clit. Her body jerks. "Oh, fuck."

"Sweetheart, look at me. Tell me exactly what you want me to do to you."

"I want you to fuck me. With your fingers, with your mouth, I don't care. I just want you," she breathes shakily.

"Good girl." I dive into her, licking a broad strip over her wet heat. Her hands tangle in my hair, pushing my mouth harder against her. I thrust my tongue into her hole, reaching up to massage her breasts as I go. I take her clit into my mouth, sucking harshly. Her body jolts and a string of curses and moans spew from her mouth.

Within minutes her legs begin to twitch and tremble uncontrollably, her thighs tightening around my head. "Cum for me, Florence," I mumble against her pussy, "and look at me when you do it."

Her eyes meet mine, though she struggles to hold the eye contact. I swirl my tongue around her clit one last time and her mouth drops open, a silent scream falling from her lips. I work her through the climax, dragging it out as much as possible before moving up her body, placing kisses over her heaving chest.

"You did so good, sweetheart," I mumble, brushing her hair away from her sweaty face.

"That was...fuck."

I laugh. "Come on, let's get you cleaned up."

"No fucking way. We're not done. I've been waiting months to fuck you," she argues.

I stammer, at a loss for words. She climbs into my lap, never breaking eye contact. Her hand slowly moves in between us, dipping into my pants. I gasp when she comes into contact with my clit. "God, you're wet," she mumbles, her fingers moving slowly inside me.

"Yeah, 'cause you're quite attractive when you're having an orgasm," I quip back, although my voice shakes embarassingly.

"Shut up," she laughs, connecting our lips. My tongue slides into her mouth at the same time her fingers pick up speed. I moan loudly, her lips muffling the sound.

She hits the perfect spot with each thrust, making my mind cloud over.

Fuck, that feels good.

Fuck, she's really hot.

Fuck, I think I'm falling in love with her. Oh-

"-fuck," I scream when her palm presses against my clit. My orgasm crashes over me without warning, my muscles tensing harshly at the wave of pleasure sweeping over me.

"Mm," she hums as she sucks my orgasm off of her fingers. We rest our foreheads together, panting for breath. We finally kiss again, slowly and in a way that tells everything we're not ready to say. The tastes of us mix as our tongues move together.

"Well that was fun," I say after we break apart.

[charlietheepicwriter7]

Hey, Little Songbird

Chapter 29 - AO3

A/N: Hey taglist, I made a lot of memes for this chapter I’ll post soon. Do you want to be tagged in those too?

Inhale.

And out.

Inhale.

And out.

Inhale.

And—

His eyes snapped open as the taxi pulled up to [School Name]. Paying the driver, Felix flipped a hood up over his head, reveling in the soft fabric and anonymity. After leaving Alya’s house, he’d immediately gone to an ATM to withdraw a few hundred pounds to carry on him. It was a risk—if Gabriel had called the police on him, then they might track his cards through his bank, but since Gabriel wasn’t his legal guardian, then it was possible that the bank wouldn’t allow access—but it was enough to live on, hiding in a motel room from the storm of akumas that plagued the city, hiding for the two nights and a day until he was allowed back in school again. He’d bought his hoodie the first night while grabbing some portable groceries, since his normal way of dress was notable, but he might keep it in his wardrobe for future use. Maybe Marinette could make him one…

He was stalling.

Popping open the taxi door, Felix headed inside, keeping his head down. His phone buzzed in his head, a confirmation from Marinette to meet before class started. His phone had been busy during his time out of Agreste Mansion; since he had to leave his laptop behind, he had to rely on Alya and Marinette’s help… mostly Alya’s, to be honest. As skilled as Marinette was, technology and dramatics weren’t really her specialty. Fortunately, she seemed invested in making Lila Rossi as miserable as possible.

Hmm. Maybe he was rubbing off on her.

Blending in with the oncoming students, Felix followed a group of boys younger than him, walking towards the gym. The gym was on the opposite side of the building from Bustier’s class, but he was early enough for it not to matter. Checking to see if anyone was watching, Felix ducked into the art room.

And there she was.

A terrible weight lifted from his shoulders; he was Atlas reborn, seeing Hesperis again for the first time in months. It certainly felt like months since he last saw Marinette. She smiled at him and Felix couldn’t—and didn’t want to—stop himself: he hugged her.

She stiffened in his arms before relaxing, her head tucked away in the nook between his jaw and shoulder. Her arms wrapped around his back and her hands buried into his sweatshirt, scrunching the fabric. Her heart beat against his chest, slow and steady. His eyes slipped closed. “Marinette.”

“What are you wearing!?” His eyes snapped open. She looked embarrassed. “Wait, sorry. I didn’t mean to say that, I was just… surprised. Are you okay?” She backed out of his hug and he opened his eyes. She stared up at him, concerned. “Alya told me, that Gabriel—”

He pressed a finger against her mouth. Fortunately, the room was empty, but someone could be listening outside the door. He pulled her to the other side of the room, as far from the door as they could be. “Yes, he is. But don’t worry, I got out of there before he could do anything to me.”

“And you’re alright?” She took a step back to study him, and his eyes were drawn to her neck. She wore a silver chain necklace that dipped below her shirt, and he could just barely see the outline of the ring he gave her. “You’ve been eating enough? And you had a safe place to stay? None of the akumas found you—”

“I’m alright. What about you? Did Gabriel send someone over to harass you because of me?”

“He sent Nathalie yesterday morning, but since you weren’t there, she left quickly. She tried to see my phone and email too, but my mom wouldn’t let her intimidate me.”

“I owe your mother a favor then.” Sabine Cheng must be a force of nature, to stop Nathalie in her tracks. “But what happened? I thought you said you were going to stay home today?” That was the plan. They were going to bait Rossi into getting akumatized, but needed her attention on Felix the whole time. To prevent her attention from straying, Marinette agreed to stay home today, while Alya planned to bolt as soon as his show began.

“Ladybug filled me in on some details.” He blinked; she was in contact with the superheroine? “The plan is for Chat Noir to protect you from the akuma, while Ladybug and a few temporary heroes help her ambush Hawkmoth. But I… She… We were worried that Lila will hurt you.”

Felix smiled. “Marinette, I’m flattered that you’re so concerned—” Though he wasn’t sure how to feel that the superheroine who punched him in the face was also concerned— “But this isn’t my first time fighting an akuma. I’ve fought three at once, remember?”

“You survived three akumas at once,” she corrected, fiddling with the front of his sweatshirt. “This is different. Lila… She’s not like other akumas.”

“How so?” And how did Marinette know this?

“Ladybug told me,” She confessed. “When Lila’s akumatized, she’s… more aware than other akumas. More focused. For other akumas, Ladybug can distract them if they need a breather, they have low-attention spans. Lila’s not like that. She’s completely focused on defeating Ladybug and Chat Noir.”

Felix cupped Marinette’s cheek. “Thank you for the warning, but I think I’ll be fine with Chat Noir’s help.”

“I don’t think so. And fortunately, Ladybug thinks the same, so you’re getting some more back-up.”

“No,” he breathed.

Her eyes flicked down, her irises slyly peeking out from under her lids, and he followed her gaze to his chest. Pinned at the V of his neckline was the Peacock Miraculous transformed. It’s dull gold metal and blood red gems winked up at him.

Duusu swooped into his face. “Hey buddy!”

Felix shot Marinette a betrayed look. “Why?”

“For your own protection.”

“But—” Duusu tried to grab his hair, so he swatted her away. “I told Alya that I didn’t want a Miraculous. I don’t need a Miraculous.”

“Ladybug and I think otherwise.” She crossed her arms over her chest, scowling at him. She looked stunning, daring and backlit by the rising sun, but Felix refused to be ruled by his baser impulses! “The protection of a Miraculous suit isn’t anything to scoff at Felix; you’ll be a lot safer if you transform.”

“Like Ladybug won’t reverse any wounds when she wins the battle!”

“Maybe she doesn’t want to reverse your broken body, maybe she just wants to avoid the problem all together.”

“Be that as it may, have neither of you considered that this might make things more dangerous for me? Gabriel has to keep me alive if he wanted to know where the Peacock Miraculous is. With your method, you’re putting our only piece of leverage right in front of his big nose!”

“Or maybe it will make Hawkmoth hyper-fixate on the battle and distract him from the world around him!”

Felix scoffed. “Trust me, you underestimate my ability to anger my uncle. His attention will be totally on me, I assure you that.”

“And you know what? If this was a normal akuma, or a normal fight, I wouldn’t care. I trust you to get out of the way of an akuma when its after you. But this is completely different from what you’re used to, and I…” Her voice hitched. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Well, that…

That was just unfair!

He had no counter to genuine concern like that!

“I’m not a hero!” He poked his finger in her face. “I can’t be. I won’t be!”

“You don’t have to be,” she quickly reassured him, smiling like she had won. “Taunt her, lead her on a chase through the city, I don’t care. Just be safe.”

“This…” His finger shook. “You’re not playing fair.”

She held his hand and lowered it back to his side. “Life’s not fair. I talked to a lot of people who argued that you shouldn’t be allowed to wield a Miraculous. But Duusu and I convinced them, so please appreciate how much we care.”

Felix looked at Duusu, who’d stayed quiet throughout their entire conversation. “You convinced them?”

“Of course, I did!” Duusu puffed out her little chest. “You’re Emilie’s precious nephew; it would be a sin not to help. Plus—” and a creepy grin grew across her face— “I want to get one over on Hawkmoth. He’s enslaved me for too long…”

Contemplating them both for a minute, Felix shook his head. “Fine!” he spat. “I’ll do it! But never again. And no one says anything about it. Not to people who don’t already know, not to me, not to each other. We all forget it ever happens. Understand?”

“I’ll spread the word.” Standing on her tip-toes, Marinette pressed a kiss to his cheek and he blue-screened. “Thank you, Felix. I’ve got to go now—I’m helping Ladybug today—but now I’m certain you’ll be safe… Wish me luck.” She smiled up at him while his brain was still recovering, and by the time he was back online, she’d already left the room. Helpless, Felix looked back and forth between the Miraculous on his chest and the door where Marinette disappeared too. That’s how Alya found him.

She cocked an eyebrow, crossing her arms. “Okay, brainiac, I can see the cogs in your head turning. What brilliant realization did you have this time?”

Felix pressed his flushed face into the cotton of his sleeve. “...I think Marinette is Rena Rouge,” he said around the fabric.

Taglist: @graduatedmelon @novicevoice @dur55 @kris-pines04 @18-fandoms-unite-08 @moonlightstar64 @bee-a-garbage-shipper @sol-o-shade @kittyotakunoir666 @tinyterror333 @allieoftheenemy @marichat00 @xgxmxtx @two-faced-biatch @feliciakainzofspades @evil-cricket @emilytopaz @spicybelladonna @chocolateherringtacofan @user00000003 @wannajointhecrabcult @happymonster-pants @duquesapincarrasca  @throneoffirebreathingbitchqueen  @sxltinette @kittydemon9000 @thetrashypanda423 @unoriginalmess  @toodaloo-kangaroo  

[countrymusiclover]

108 - Like Father Like Daughters

Part 109

Gemini Runaway

@icefrye19 @secretdreamlandmentality

109 is the last chapter in this story ❤️

Bursting into my daughters bedroom the door’s almost broke off the hinges by how angry I was. “What the hell were you all thinking last night!”

“Mom, please don’t be mad but it was to get Elijah’s memory back. And to get our family back together like we are now.” Alina raised her voice at me getting up from the bed.

Missy and Hope remained sitting where they were at. But my youngest spoke up. We wanted our family back together, mom.”

“Girls urgh! Do you have any idea what putting that power back into yourselves could do? That it could kill you!” Covering my face with my hands I grumble loudly in annoyance.

Hope snapped back at me thinking that it would make this better. “We spared Henrik and Andrea.”

“Oh well then I should jump for joy.” I clapped my hands together with a sarcastic tone. “All because you spared your brother and cousin even though you forgot that this can kill you!”

Klaus vamped into the room aboto raise his voice until he saw something running down Hope’s arm. “When did this start happening?”

“Shortly after we took the power back, why?” She yanked her arm away.

Yet he grabbed her wrist holding it out for my viewing. “Oh we’re so screwed.” I cursed under my breath seeing the same black veins that I had dealt with years ago before we knew I was pregnant too

Rushing into the bathroom I threw my head down into the toilet for the fourth time today. Familiar hands pulled my hair away from my mouth hearing me lightly crying. “I’ve got ya, Rae. Let it all out…Shhh I’m here.”

“Ohh Nik. I’m so terrified right now.” Lifting my head up I wiped my mouth with a rag pressing my body against his chest still crying. “I feel like I’m dying….”

He put his thumb and index finger under my chin turning my head so I was forced to look into his blue eyes. “Listen to me, Raelyn Lane. You are not dying. Not while I am still alive and kicking.”

“But every time I do magic these….get worse!” Yanking up the sleeve of one of his Henry shirts I was wearing I bared my teeth. My hair was slightly in front of my eyes and my shirt was stained with my tears.

He slowly cups my face in his hands with his thumbs running over the fallen tears. His blue eyes focused on mine. “Rae, I promise you that nothing bad is going to happen to you. We will get through this. You’re not going to die on me.”

“I don’t wanna die, Nik. I don’t…wanna die!” Throwing my arms around his neck I buried my face into his shoulder. He tugged me to sit on his lap while he wrapped his arms around my waist. My fingers are gripping onto the fabric of his shirt.

Brushing my fingers over the lines on Hope’s arm I felt some tears falling down my face at remembering what that was like. Klaus and I both met the others' gaze before we whipped our heads around seeing Missy holding her head in agony. “Shut up, shut up, shut up! Incendia!” She throws her hands up towards the bed frame setting it on fire.

“Melissa! What the bloody hell was that for?” Klaus dropped Hope’s arm focused on his now heretic daughter.

She dropped her hands at her side, falling to sit on the floor. Alina moved around the bed frame lowering herself on her knees holding her shoulders. “Hey, everything is okay ... .dad ever since we took the power back..we keep hearing whispers in our ears and they don’t stop.”

“Is this the rest of our life? A rage that can only be quieted by violence?” Hope spat, turning her head back to me and Nik.

Reaching down I grasped his hand in mine looking up at my husband smirking wickedly. “Hope, if violence is what you need to feel better, then you have the perfect parents.” Klaus grinned the same expression back to our other two daughters.

It was a few hours before the five of us went downstairs since there was enough stuff in there we could break and not actually care about. Andrea and Henrik were out in the bayou with Hayley and Jacob. While Jackson was packing up some stuff to try and get Alina and him a cabin in the woods near the quarter. Looking from the balcony above I watched Alina throw her father down on the table with the flower pots. “Do it again. Harder this time.” He grunted slowly getting to his feet.

“Mom, do we need to do it this way? I don’t want to hurt you.” Missy asked, lifting her gaze up to me before I climbed up onto the railing before I jumped down on the ground perfectly fine.

Brushing hair out of my face I looked at my youngest. Even though she now had to drink blood to survive she had managed to keep the innocent side of her alive after she turned. “Honey, you’re dad and I are the strongest creatures in the world. Nothing you do can truly hurt us.”

“Motus!” She raised her hands where I got thrown against the family crest on the wall where I felt some bones break in my back.

I popped my back into place pushing hair out of my face looking at Klaus who threw his hands away from his sides trying to get Hope angry since she wasn’t using her full strength. “All of that pain, that simmering darkness. You need to purge it before it eats you alive.”

“Dad…” Hope held her head gripping her hair in her fingers.

Alina stared at me where I gave her a head nod and she launched me against the wall across the room. Holding my head I grunted seeing some stars in my eyes. “Woah I guess a werewtich’s strength is no joke.”

“Give me your anger, Hope!” Klaus screamed at her finally getting her to throw him. He landed right beside me against the wall.

Hope paced back and forth panicking to us. “It's not working.”

Klaus rested his head against mine where I put my hand on his knee trailing through breaths. “You're holding back.”

“You really think I want to feel this way? No matter how hard I try to get it out, I don't feel any better.” Hope whipped her head around raising her voice.

Missy came over to where we were standing. “We don’t want to hurt you.”

“You’re not the ones that caused our death and transformation…only that person will make us feel better.” Alina brushed her hair out of her face clutching her hands into fists at her side.

Hope nodded through tears. “You're not the one I want to hurt.”

Klaus raised his gaze up to our three daughters. “Give me a name.”

In a few short hours he came back and was dragging in Roman’s body through the main entrance and down into the basement chaining him up. He threw vervain on the boy so he was already weak. “Have you decided how you're going to kill him?” Roman attempted to break the chains but it didn’t work.

“They’re enchanted chains, Roman. Only a witch can remove them. You’re not going anywhere.” I explained to him standing beside my husband who just stared at him.

Hope mumbled hidden behind the corner. “Slowly.”

“Hope? Hope! Hey.” Roman called out to her.

Alina and Missy walked out into his view standing behind me and Klaus. “We want to do this alone….he doesn’t deserve a quick punishment. His mother didn’t give that to Missy.”

“What?” The young vampire boy muttered.

Hope questions finally step out into view. “This is supposed to help me feel better, right?”

Roman gulped. .”What's wrong with them?”

Klaus sat down in the vervain bucket where I crossed my arms over my chest. “She has an affliction, for which your pain is a momentary comfort.”

Roman asked. “My pain?”

Nik nods in agreement. “Mm-hmm.”

Alina snapped at him, flashing her hybrid eyes. “But I don't want an audience.”

“Girls.” Their father sent them a questionable look.

Missy added on looking at me softly. “If you want to help us, go….mom gets to stay.”

“Well, I was rather hoping to be part of the show.” Nik said with a dry tone leaning towards Roman and getting close to his face. “Well, consider starting small, then. Fingernails, or-or... perhaps the tongue. Build the suspense.”

Klaus nods at me before he leaves the room and Roman begins panicking. “Hey... hey, wait. You're not actually gonna leave me with them, are you? I know you won't believe this, but I've been trying to see you, okay?”

Hope stood across the room gripping the metal bars in her fingers. “You're right. I don't believe it.” She raised her hand sending pain through his body.

“I-I swear. My sister, she wanted me to leave the country, but I wouldn't go until I got to talk to you.” He dropped his head gasping for breath.

Hope scrambled into the corner. “Is this the kind of talk you had in mind?”

“Look, I-I know. Taking part in your aunt and uncle’s capture and tricking you, that was wrong and I know that.” Roman turned his head looking back at Hope who was standing behind him.

She raised her hand into a fist making Roman wince in agony. “And yet you did it anyway!”

“That’s only half of what we are angry about. Lihednat dolchitni!” Alina stomps forward grabbing Roman’s throat in her hand.

He struggled for air. “Alina ... .I'm sorry, okay.”

“That won’t fix it. There’s no apology in the world that will fix what your mother made me do to my little sister!” The werewitch growled, showing him her werewolf eyes before she did the spell that Kai taught me to make someone’s blood boil. “Phasmatos navaro pulsus sanguinox!”

Roman gasped sharply where he tried to break free from the chains but they only got tighter around his wrists. “Mrs. Mikaelson, I….I’m sorry….it’s just - urgh!”

“I don’t normally hurt people but you made me die…you….forced my sister to trigger her curse.” Missy raised her hand making him wince again and I could see his skin was bleeding.

Roman dropped his head struggling for breath while he began slowly healing from the wounds they had given him. “No, you... you have to understand. For years I've been told to fear you, every day, every night, stories of what your father did to mine, what you and your kind have done to us.”

Hope scolded him. “My kind?”

Alina stomped her foot on the ground where the flames in the room grew higher and then died down. “Do you not get that you have messed up my family. You made my mother go paranoid about her brother. You made me kill my twin sister while I was trying to stop your mother and yet you still think you’re innocent!”

“I…I never said I was innocent Alina. It’s just - ohhh!” Roman got cut off with Missy waving her hand and making pain shoot through his head and his nose was bleeding all the while I was just leaned up against the wall just silently watching my daughter’s. “No, no, no, I like you, Hope, okay? I like you, I really do. I just didn't know whether to listen to the voice in my head that said you were good or my mother's voice that said over and over y-you and your family…”

Hope moved around to stand in front of Roman with her standing in the middle of her two sisters. “My family's what?”

Roman gulped weakly. “Evil….And I wasn't strong enough to fight her. And I don't want you to forgive me. I just want you to know that I know what I did was wrong. Okay?”

My phone went off so I pulled it out of my pocket where I read a text message from Klaus that read 'How is everything going?' I texted him back saying that they were still in the process. Missy crossed her arms over her chest glaring at him. "Do you have anything else to say?"

"I…I can't fix what happened…and I really am sorry. I just wasn't strong enough to not listen to her." He gulped, gripping the chains weakly in his grip.

Hope nodded towards Alina who grabbed his chin in her grasp putting her other hand over his heart listening to it beating inside his chest very slowly which was a normal vampire's rate. "You have no idea what you took from me. You stole my innocence from me and I have to live with that for the rest of my life!"

Hope raised the dagger she had brought in up with her magic about to stab him in the heart but she dropped it kicking and screaming until she met my gaze crying. "Mom…I…I can't…kill him."

"Come on, girls. Let's find your dad." I ushered them out of the room leaving Roman chained there. The girls all sat down on the couch in the living room when Klaus came into the room seeing us there.

He slowly bent down on his knees tracing his thumb over meeting my gaze when he said his words. "All that power, still merciful. You clearly didn't get that from my side of the family.”

“This is only gonna get worse, isn't it?” I trailed off wrapping my arms around myself worried that we might not have another solution.

Klaus rose to his feet taking my hand in his and he tilted his head telling the girls to follow us. We ended up inside the church and I gasped recognizing the room from the vision Dahlia showed me years ago. There was an entire room of vampires and I saw that Greta Roman’s mom was here too. “There you go, girls. Just let it all out.” Hope, Alina and Missy intertwined hands turning away from us. Missy and Alina turned Hope’s hands red siphoning from her while I stood beside my husband. Together the three witches just gave it everything they had but what we didn’t know was that there was one human there and he wouldn’t make it.

[casspurrjoybell-24]

My Mate - Chapter 11 - Part 3

*Warning Adult Content*

"No," I exclaimed forcefully, tucking my head in the crease of Robert's neck where his scent glands are located and his scent is the strongest.

He kept telling me I should get dressed but he didn't understand that it physically hurt.

My skin felt raw when I wasn't in contact with him.

He growled, giving up and leaning his back against the headboard.

His big hands slid up my sides and he pulled me over so I was straddling him.

Happy, I rubbed against his bare chest.

My whole body was like one big nerve and it felt almost euphoric when he touched me.

He smelt so good too... I just wanted him to hold me forever.

"You should eat," he spoke up, disrupting the silence.

His hands moving to my back.

Humming, I licked at his neck and made the male grumble as his arms tightened around me.

My licks turned to wet kisses as I followed up his neck and along his strong jaw.

I could feel how I affected him.

It would of been impossible to hide with me straddling him.

He must be uncomfortable confined in his jeans but he made no attempts to relieve himself.

Pulling back, I met his dark brown eyes and smiled.

Robert chuckled, leaning up and pressing a kiss to my lips.

"You're an Alpha now. The Alpha," I remembered.

How was I so lucky to get such a male as my Mate?

Robert is strong and respected and so... so handsome.

I'm just a plain Omega... one of the dozens in the pack.

"I am," he nodded.

"And soon I'll have the cutest fucking Luna."

My face heated and I hid it in the crease of his neck, unable to wipe off my smile.

"I'm not cute, I'm sexy," I joked and Robert laughed.

"I agree but you're still really fucking cute."

Nipping at his neck playfully, I didn't expect him to react so strongly.

His moan made me shiver and tingle.

Whining softly, I wiggled over the bulge under me.

One of the Alpha male's big hands slipped under the sheet bunched up around my waist and he roughly grabbed my bare bottom, the other hand tangled in my hair and pulled my head back.

His lips roughly smashed against mine, his tongue demanding entrance.

I submitted so easily, letting him do as he pleased.

I wanted whatever he had to offer... I even started to wonder if waiting until after the Matting Ceremony was all that important.

It wasn't like he's not my Mate... he is... what's the point of waiting to mate with him?

A loud knocking startled me so much I jumped and tumbled off the bed, squeaking.

Robert burst into laughter, his face turning red from the force of it.

"Shut up," I cried dramatically, staying where I was on the floor.

"Oh my Moon Goddess," he laughed, wiping at tears under his eyes.

I glared at him, jumping again when there was another knock.

Scrambling to me feet, I jumped on the bed and dove under the covers.

Peeking out, I watched Robert get up to see who it was.

The big idiot was still laughing at me like it was the funniest thing he'd ever seen.

My eyes traveled over the expanse of his muscular back, all the way down to where his jeans hung sensuously from his narrow hips.

My body started to ache again and I tried not to wiggle around on the bed in search of friction.

He opened the door, making me narrow my eyes because he hadn't put a shirt on.

Now eye candy for whoever was disturbing us.

"I know, I know," a female spoke up quickly before Robert could say anything.

I slammed my face a pillow at the sound of my Mom's voice.

Moon Goddess, she's going to haul me out of here.

"I brought food and drinks."

Huh? Lifting my head, I could see Robert was as confused as me.

I couldn't see mom over his broad shoulders, which was probably a good thing because I was currently naked in a male's bed.

Well, he's my Mate but surely Mom wouldn't want to see that.

Making sure I was fully covered, I pretended to be sleeping and listened as Mom passed over a cart of food.

Robert wouldn't let her step in the room, being territorial but Mom didn't seem to mind.

"Make sure he eats and drinks plenty of water," she fretted.

I smiled, silently thanking the Moon Goddess she hadn't come to drag me away.

Robert chuckled as he shut the door behind him, making sure to lock it so no one could barge in.

I sat up on my knees, eyes on the cart of food. Mom had really outdone herself.

There were snacks and bottled water on the bottom, on top was steaming lasagna and breadsticks.

I hadn't realized how hungry I was until I got a whiff of all the freshly cooked food.

Waiting impatiently, Robert unwrapped one of the plates before offering it to me.

I scooted back against the headboard and got comfortable while Robert got his own plate.

Shoveling food in my mouth, I moaned.

"Make sure to breathe," Robby teased.

I didn't respond, only snatched one of the breadsticks off his plate.

Nothing else was said, the both of us too busy inhaling my Mom's food.

When we were finished, Robert piled everything back on the cart.

We laid there, stuffed and content.

"Don't tell my Mom I said this but your mom's food is the best," Robby said.

Giggling, I turned onto my side and cuddled up against him.

"I think that's why she was hired as head chef."

Everyone knew that when Luna came into the kitchen to help, to give her something minimal to do that wouldn't spoil the whole meal.

The same kind of jobs I was given.

"One time she cooked us dinner and Dad made us eat her burnt meatloaf."

His hand started rubbing my back soothingly and I hummed.

"I haven't had meatloaf since," he said, a look of horror on his face from the memory.

"Do you remember when she made chicken noodle soup and everyone got sick?" I snickered and Robby groaned.

"I think that's when Mom finally realized she couldn't cook."

"Well if giving half the pack food poisoning didn't do it, who knows what would have."

"Death," Robby chuckled.

We continued sharing stories and joking around.

As much as I enjoyed listening to my Mate's voice and learning anything I could about him, I was constantly distracted by the ache throughout my body.

It was strange, being so desperate for his touch.

'My heats' had never been so intense.

I could go a week with mild cramps and the occasional horniness but there was never this unavoidable need to be touched.

What was really bothering me, was that Robert hadn't even attempted touching me in the way I so blatantly wanted.

Any other male would of had his way with me.

Did my own Mate not want me in that way?

Grumpy, I rolled on top of Robby.

He paused in his mindless banter about humans to look at me.

Scooting down, I straddled his thighs and boldly grabbed his jeans to unbutton them.

"Woah," Robby gripped my hands, sitting up quickly.

"What are you doing?"

"I just wanna see," I lied and he knew it.

I wanted to do more than just look.

He raised a brow, his eyes searching mine.

I knew he probably thought it was just 'my heat' talking... it wasn't.

I was curious and I did want to see him, all of him... he's my Mate.

My Heat may be giving me a little nudge and the confidence boost I needed to initiate anything, but that's all.

Robert didn't look so sure.

"We should wait until after our Mating Ceremony."

"You let others touch you, why not me?" the words flew out without much thought, my feelings hurt.

Was it because I wasn't as pretty as the male I'd found in his bed?

I knew it was a stupid thought and wrong of me but I was jealous.

Others had seen all of my Mate, had seen him in the throes of passion, had touched him and been touched by him.

Even my heat couldn't get rid of the lingering thought in the back of my mind, the knowledge that Robert had been with others.

Mom had always told me that kind of intimacy was only to be shared between Mates who love each other.

"Fuck off, Torin," Robby spat, his jaw ticking and exposing his anger.

He pushed me off him before he got up and slammed the bathroom door shut behind him.

Pulling the cover over my head, I pouted, upset with myself.

Of course I had to mess up and ruin what had been a good day.

Only minutes ago we had been joking and laughing.

I should have been satisfied with cuddling.

Now my Mate was in a bad mood because of me.

[lifewithoutmeds]

august 7, 2023

another pretty bad month.

there were a couple days i think, maybe before the camping trip in which i felt the mildest of lifts, probably when i sat down to write my last entry, but it’s been bad since.

quick recap of the last few weeks july 21-23: camping with rhiannon. she picked me up friday morning, we packed up her car, and head up to bishop. stopped at the grocery outlet for a ton of groceries, some beer, firewood, etc., got a sandwich at Schat’s, and browsed the bishop visitor center (and i picked up two new graphic t shirts.) it was very hot, like in the 90′s or 100′s, but was fortunately a bit cooler at our site (like maybe mid 80′s.) we set up and spent the next couple days chilling/fishing by rock creek lake (me fishing and rhiannon in her hammock), sitting around the fire, and mostly just feeling alternately hot and bug-bitten. i cried when we turned the bend to rock creek lake and i remembered very specific spots where i’d had conversations with jadai, when i looked at her expression, when i wanted her to see the lake, when i looked for the delight in her eyes. i cried when we went to the little store by rock creek lake resort, i remembered how we had looked at everything, been so enamored with everything and with each other. i wept.

wednesday, july 26: went to work. had our monthly lunch. i think it might have been miguel’s last day and i sat next to him and tried to talk and be pleasant to others. for dinner i met lorena at hong kong bbq and we had chow fun and fried pork and i brought home the fried pork and it wasn’t very good.

thursday, july 27: had a zoom psychiatrist appointment where i was crying, and she told me to start taking 10mg of lexapro again because of all the sadness and crying and wanting to die business. she also increased my lamotrigine to 150 mg but for some reason i couldn’t get it filled until like august 3 (delivered august 4) so i went for a week without and maybe coincidentally kinda lost my mind for the next two weeks. i also had izakaya dinner with tracy (who came by and i drove us to little tokyo.) we went to beard papa’s where she got a cream puff for her wife and we stopped at the little tokyo market where i got a couple cans of yerba mate, then we headed back.

friday, july 28: dinner with stephen and billy in ktown at a place called T Equals Fish. live octopus. live shrimp. ok seafood. some soju. i was feeling pretty down but tried not to show it.

saturday, july 29: facetime with kelda. don’t recall much but probably cried. then went to clay and amy’s for clay’s 40th birthday party. i mostly just chatted with jenny and had a few beers before heading home.

have no recollection of sunday. i think i had considered going to a local espiscopal church but then didn’t. i probably just laid in bed and stared at my phone.

tuesday, august 1: forced myself to leave the condo and go to the market to buy some charcuterie stuff then met up with my mom and drove to the LA zoo where we then shuttled to the hollywood bowl to watch her favorite pianist. we met up with some of her choir friends earlier and they gave us some homemade kimbap and fruit, and i tried not to look dead inside but was not very talkative or friendly, and i just kinda tried to wait everything out. like i didn’t really want to be there. i didn’t want to be out. i didn’t want to sit on a concrete bench. i didn’t want to have to gauge how much liquid i could drink because we were pretty squashed in between other people and going to the bathroom would be hard. i watched the pianist and was just ... i just felt so empty, just wondering how all these people could be so interested, so invested, get so much joy out of this, and i was just thinking of how uncomfortable i was, and how i couldn’t wait until this ended, and reminded myself to feel gratitude for every day and every night that i got to stay at home alone and not have to bother with anything. finally it was over and people clapped and clapped and he came back for an encore and played this etude by Chopin and i just started sobbing. it’s one of my favorite piano pieces and it had been the theme song for the first tv show that i enjoyed, a japanese tv show with a very beautiful woman and a very unattractive man that my mom had dumbed down for me by calling it “Beauty and the Beast” although it was something like, “1001 Dates” or something. and i just suddenly remembered all of my longing, and how that was probably one of my first crushes, and how drawn i was to the woman, and just how much longing i have in general for beautiful women. i just cried and cried with aching and longing. we then watched the other half which did Not feature the pianist then left with the mob and shuttled back and bid each other adieu.

wednesday, august 2: i had somehow agreed to meet up with kelly to go walking after work at the Los Angeles State Historic Park and was annoyed i had done so, considering all i wanted to do was get out of the heat and resume lying on my face, but we ended up meeting up and i got in more steps than i had in the weeks prior, and we caught up and chatted and it ended up being good.

friday, august 4: not sure how or when but somehow i had agreed to go on an open charter fishing boat with a County coworker i had never met in real life and was dreading it. dreading having to do something, dreading having to get ready for it, and having to sleep early and wake up early, for having to think ahead and for having to do anything other than feed myself, go to the bathroom, and lie on my face, but i did, and it was slightly better than the alternative of lying on my face for 12 hours. i suppose it was good to be out in the fresh air and feel the wind and sun on my face though i threw up my breakfast burrito. there were times when i looked out at the water and contemplated throwing myself overboard, but i stopped myself and just stared emptily for long periods.

saturday and sunday i must’ve taken a total of about 300 steps. just from the bed to the bathroom to the kitchen for 1-2 meals/day. and just endless amounts of 90-day fiance recaps on the youtube. just. nothing. just a waste. trash built up. dishes piled up. i knew the fish fillets would slowly go bad but i didn’t have the wherewithal to do anything about it. i had to get an oil change but couldn’t bring myself to go. i just did nothing. i considered going to long beach pride with my bumble bff friend but then decided against it and resumed doing nothing.

today’s monday august 7. i surprised myself. granted i’d been in bed all weekend, but i actually got up only 10 minutes after the alarm rang (lately i’d been staying in bed til just past 7.) i made my bed. i might’ve even washed my face and put on a bit of lotion. i was more present at work than i’d been for the past week. i managed to text my mom and let her know about the fish fillets and she said she’d come over and pick them up. i did some dishes. i took out some trash and recycling. when she came over, i cried and raged a little bit about everyone and everything being a stupid hamster on a stupid wheel and crying, but also thanked her for coming by. she washed some dishes and cleaned my floor. miraculously, i had the wherewithal to go to glendale lube after work and get my oil changed. i then even went to the local coin car wash and sprayed the bird poop that had been baking on my car for the last few weeks. then when i got home i somehow took a 30 minute walk, took a shower, and then sat down to journal. shocking.

what’s kind of weird is that i didn’t really feel like doing any of this. i kind of didn’t feel too markedly different than i did yesterday or the day before. the bed still appealed to me. my phone still appealed to me. the circumstances were largely the same. i don’t know whether maybe i was just sick of being in bed for so long or feeling guilty or whatever, but i still felt extreme reluctance to do many things but somehow i still did them. and that was very surprising. that i could. that i could just sort of mechanically go about and still do a lot of the life things. i could still answer emails and check on permit statuses and i could still write down my expenses for the month. was it muscle memory? was it a strong feeling of obligation/duty? it was bizarre. it was like playing with a Sim and just having it do certain tasks. i just set myself to do things and just did them until they were finished and time had passed and things were getting accomplished and it was bizarre that things could still happen even though i felt empty about the whole process. it was weird that i could do things or not do things. regardless, the day passed, but it was a matter of if the place smelled more or less fishy. i could cramp my hand by holding my phone for 12 hours at a time, or i could scrub my bathtub. it made no difference to life. but one hurt my hand and one made my bathtub less scummy.

must remember. must remember.

[reallygrossstuff]

Susie forcing Kris into diapers?

As of typing this, this is the last DR request in my inbox. If nothing new comes in I guess I'll have to find something else to write (or stop procrastinating and finish my longer stories instead OTL)

Also I've done enough of these that I should probably start using character tags. I won't use the characters' real names because this definitely doesn't belong in the main tags, but my bad jokes will probably make it obvious who's who.

“Oh, this is too good,” Susie cackled, leaning back as she opened Kris’ dresser drawer the rest of the way. Obviously the first thing she’d done on being let into Kris’ bedroom was to dig for dirt, hunting around for an old diary or photo album, but she hadn’t at all expected what she’d actually found.

In the bottom drawer of the dresser, next to a pile of neatly-folded winter pyjamas, was an opened pack of nighttime diapers.

The moment Kris saw what Susie had found, what little colour they had drained from their face, the human quickly averting their eyes from the sight. Good, it wouldn’t be funny if Kris wasn’t ashamed to have it found.

“Man, Kris, you just keep upping the ante on being a weenie, huh?” Lifting the pack out of the drawer, Susie set it down on Kris’ bed to get a better look at it. The packaging said there were two dozen in the pack, but there were probably four or so missing, creating a noticeable void within the clear plastic wrapping.

“Shut up,” Kris hissed, probably going for insulted but really just coming across as embarrassed. “I don’t wear those, mom just never throws anything out.”

“There’s some missing,” Susie said, fixing Kris with her best smug grin and waiting out their attempt at stoic silence.

Eventually they cracked, the need to defend themself winning out over the urge to not dig their hole deeper. “...I caught that stomach bug that went around the school last year, and it was worse for humans - don’t laugh!” They cut themself off when Susie started doing just that, one hand gripping her face as she laughed at the ceiling.

“Oh wow, that’s great, I needed a laugh like that.” Eventually Susie’s glee settled, her loud laughter no longer raising Kris’ hackles. “I bet you looked so dumb in these things, I’ve gotta see that.”

Crossing their arms over their chest, Kris said, “It’s not like mom took photos of me while I was sick.”

“No, duh, that’d be dumb. But I’ve still gotta see it.”

Kris just stared for a minute, clearly not getting what Susie was saying. She waited silently, counting the seconds until realisation brought heat back to their face. “Absolutely not.”

“I wasn’t asking you! After all the bossing us around you did today, I deserve to see something this stupid.” She watched Kris turn towards the bedroom door, but it was easy to get there first and lean her weight against it so they couldn’t open it. “No running away from this one.”

Kris kept trying to pull at the door anyway, but without any magic Dark World strength it stayed firmly shut. “Why do you even want to see something that stupid?”

“I dunno, stress relief? Payback for you telling Noelle I have a tail? Do I gotta have a reason? It’s just funny.” Once Kris stopped yanking at the door, Susie grabbed them by the neck of their shirt and dragged them back towards the bed, Kris quickly giving up on trying to out-strength her.

“Telling Noelle you have a tail didn’t ruin your reputation, though.”

“And this is gonna ruin yours? It’s not like I’ve got a phone to take pics on, and I already know you’re a huge nerd, this isn’t gonna change that. It’s just getting even. Now quit trying to distract me, we’re getting you in this thing.”

Obviously Susie had no idea how to put a diaper on somebody, but the point of this wasn’t to do it well. Shoving Kris until they sat on the bed, she yanked their pants and boxers down around their ankles (admittedly awkward, but Susie kept focused on the task at hand) before grabbing one of the diapers from the pack now that it was back in arm’s reach.

Wrapping the diaper around Kris’ waist - and working around their defensive gestures in the process - Susie pulled all the tapes as tight as they’d go, assuming that was what they were there for, and stepped back to judge the finished product, taking their pants with her as insurance.

If it wasn’t so clearly Kris’ size, Susie probably would’ve assumed the diapers were something Toriel had bought for the little kids she taught. The waistband had a repeating pattern of various monster parts, horns and tails covered in all manner of fur, scales and feathers. The main body of padding was mostly unadorned, save for a pair of vertical lines surrounded by rainbow stars, probably some sort of fade-when-wet design.

As she’d hoped, Kris looked even dumber wearing it.

“God, this is better than I expected, you look like such a weenie.” Susie grinned, only not laughing because that would make her look away from Kris’ show of ever-increasing discomfort. They kept shifting around on top of the bedspread, freezing up every time the diaper crinkled under them, tugging at the hem of their shirt as if that could ever cover them up. “Do you feel like a weenie too? I bet you do.”

“The weeniest, obviously,” Kris signed, throat bobbing with an aborted attempt to speak. If they’d said it, Susie might have assumed they were trying to deflect, but the signing was a clear indicator that they really were embarrassed by this.

“Good, that’s the point. Oh man, even Ralsei would think you look like a dork wearing those.” Eyes widening with a new thought, Susie asked, “Do you think they’d turn into something if we went to see him? Like our clothes normally do?”

“I’m not going all the way into a Dark World wearing this,” Kris replied, dodging the actual question Susie had asked. She’d bet it would turn into something though, probably something even dumber than how it already looked.

“Hell yeah you are. Here,” she said, throwing Kris’ pants back at them, “put those back on, I gotta see this.”

Kris caught the pants but didn’t otherwise move. “No. I put this on for you, I’m not going back to school wearing these.”

“God, man, just because you look like a damn baby doesn’t mean you’ve gotta act like one,” Susie groaned. “Put those on, seriously, or I’ll drag you to school without ‘em.”

Kris shut up and put the pants on quickly after that. At least they learned fast.

[thetruth007]

The bing BANG

Georgia

It’s peaceful for the most part my mom and i have been on our own for a year my step father is stationed in Japan however yet again it’s short lived he’s coming back for Christmas with “gifts” why am i not excited because his gift always come with something awful yelling screaming physical or emotion but i was optimistic. Maybe the time apart made me miss having my “dad” around. Oh how naive was i? He did surprise me he knew my favorite color he got me purple uggs which were really cool later that day though i was thrown into the lions den. It’s mid day we were in the car getting ready to leave everything was normal until he went to back out of the driveway per usual he’s driving and I’m sitting behind my mother he’s 6’6 so i needed leg room. I remember it all as if it was in slow motion. His left hand on the steering wheel right on the passenger headrest as the car rolls back i feel it slam on breaks and scream “ARE FU***** kidding” repeats as if no one heard him he’s looking at my shoes I’m wearing Georgia work boots that i borrowed from a friend before i could even react he’s taken his right hand past my shoulder closest to passenger side window and grabbed the seatbelt. Its too late i can’t do anything the seatbelt is choking me and i can’t breathe my mom in shock hasn’t moved i feel like minutes have passed i managed to break free maybe by the grace of god or maybe because he was in the front driver seat and i was in the back all i could think was to run. I opened the door and ran but as soon as i did it was like i forgot to walk i fell to the ground stumbling trying to get up and run but i just don’t have the breathe finally i see my mother she’s gotten in between us her hands held up between us though i have time to get across the yard and even down the street so i know i have to push though it’s my life we’re talking about. I run down the street in time for my to get in the car and pick me up i had only made it two or three houses down. I saw it was just her so i got in the car and we called the police my mom had to talk to them at first because my throat hurt my chest hurt i was gasping for air we finally see the cops driving up the road they stopped and asked if we were the ones who called my mom said yes we follow the cop back to the house this time was different he physically hurt me who cares about the emotional abuse i have proof he physically hurt me if i had any say he was going away and for a long time…. Little did i know step-father had already made a plan for us I’m trembling at this point still out of breathe but not from being choked or running but out of fear he looked different he looked devilish laughing i can’t hear much i see him lift his shirt and show a red mark dead center of his chest at this point I’m internally screaming he’s lying he’s lying he’s lying stupid liar he was telling the cops my mother had hit him when i know my mother wouldn’t dare we’ve been on eggshells all my life she would never plus i didn’t see that if anything her hands could’ve been on his shoulders as she was trying to hold him back while he was charging me when i stumbled and glanced back in the front yard i get out of the car then the cops ask me well “do you want to press charges” “yes” i responded cop well here is the problem he’s saying your mother hit him and if you’re going to press charges against him then he’s pressing charges against your mother. I look at my mother she balling her eyes out. I couldn’t do this to my mother she did nothing wrong she helped me i can’t let her go down for his lies so i let it go plus he’s going back to Japan in two days he was forced to still leave that night and stay at hotel but after that it was back to usual plus I’d be graduating high school soon so there’s hope of escaping this never ending torture

[sunboki]

HAVING A NIGHTMARE WITH THE HYUNG LINE

including; bang chan, lee minho, seo changbin, hwang hyunjin

genre; fluff, angst?..

BANGCHAN hardly sleeps as well all know, he’s practically a vampire. except the most cuddly and adorable vampire ever. so after an extremely long day, snuggling into your already asleep figure even if he doesn’t end up sleeping with you sounds delightful. apart from when he pulls the sheets over himself he’s alarmed with your quiet sniffles. “honey, oh honey..” he whispers, voice despite being exhausted gentle. “scary dream?” your frantic nodding told him yes. his thumbs lightly rubbed your cheeks, forcing you to look up at those eyes you loved oh so much. “it’s okay honey, i’m here.” chan reminded, chiding you close to him. your grip never faltered on his shirt, his scent and warmth engulfing you like a warm cave. rest assured, it didn’t take you long to doze off again. your cozy wolf chan.

MINHO’s eyes shot open at your cry of his name. hardly awake to process what was even going on. “minho minho! oh my god oh my god minho..” your hands shook violently as you sobbed into his chest. “what happened are you hurt?” those concerned brown orbs studying you as he lifted your hands—looking for the problem. “i….i had a dream i lost you..” you heaved to catch your breath, fragile eyes gazing up at him helplessly. it broke his heart to see you so scared. “i’m not going anywhere. you know that.” he peppered tiny kisses along your neck and jawline. eyes glancing up to you with a mini smile stretching at his cheeks. “and i know the kitties would experience hell without me.” this spurred a giggle from you, and as cheesy as it sounds—minho swore the pitch dark room lit up because of that laugh. “you don’t think they’d manage with me?” you faked a pout, arching a curious brow at his reply. “no they’d manage with their cat-mom, but they’d miss me most.” you rolled your eyes at this. cat parents. yep.

CHANGBIN shouted angrily at han, laying his controller down with frustration. the quokka quickly covered the dwaekki’s loud mouth as changbin eyes him in confusion. “y/n ah’s sleeping! be quiet!” he teased his hyung endlessly, but before your boyfriend could whine he caught his tongue. to keep from waking you up, he’d restrain himself from strangling the quokka till later. however, you just happened to have stirred awake—caught in a storm of terror. at the realization that your beloved was gaming outside sent you straight into his arms. because right now, your heart was beating to fast to be alone. “oh y/n ah did we wake you up?” han began only for you to wrap yourself around changbin, clinging to him like a koala. your boyfriend threaded his fingers through yours, noting how you shook. “scared? you can stay in here with us.” he soothed, spare hand rubbing your back. he knew you were still shaken up, deciding to instead take your mind off it with his sweet words and careful hands. adorable.

HYUNJIN sat with his knees pulled to his chest, simply admiring your sleeping face. his hands steadily sketched in the notebook he carried around religiously, taking in the slight crinkle in your brow, the way your eyelashes dusted along as you dreamt. a good word to describe how he felt would easily be enamored, enchanted. you were stunning in his eyes no matter what you did, even sleeping didn’t change that factor. so your quiet mumbles of his name didn’t cease to peek his curiosity. “baby?” he called hesitantly, jumping in his chair when you sprung to life. running a hand along your face. “holy crap..” but upon noticing him sitting there caused you both to shriek in surprise. hyunjin laughed at this, shoulders shaking nonstop. “did i scare you that bad?” he mused, observing your frazzled state. “yeah, and my dream did too. it was straight up weird.” this made the jiniret chuckle as well. “now i know you pout when you have nightmares.” — “what?” — “nothing.”

all rights for this work are owned by @sunboki

[urwelcomeforthis]

Alex’s tattoo shows up the day after she punches Marcus Hinkle.

He had been picking on Kara in the hallway, dangling her math book above her head, taking advantage of his summer growth spurt.

Kara still doesn’t know what possessed Alex – Marcus Hinkle had been a thorn in her side since she had landed on Earth and started school a year ago, but whatever the reason, today was the day Alex couldn’t take anymore.

Eliza had been furious. Jeremiah had been (not so) silently proud.

Kara didn’t know what she had felt, really. Especially not when she asked Alex why, and the older girl had just shrugged and said “You’re my sister. It’s what we do.”

Up until this point being sisters meant fights in the hallway over the bathroom and ignoring each other at the dinner table.

Apparently, things were changing.

Kara is just waking up when she hears Alex’s hushed “What the hell?”

“What is it?” She asks, groggily sitting up and wiping at the sleep in her eyes.

Her sister is holding her forearm up, frantically scrubbing at a spot right in the middle, her eyes frantic.

“I don’t…. I don’t know! It’s like a tattoo but I didn’t get a tattoo! Fuck, Mom is going to kill me.” Alex sounds panicked as she continues scrubbing at the spot, and Kara feels her heartbeat speed up.

“You had a tattoo just appear on your skin?” Kara asks slowly, her mind suddenly far away on a planet that doesn’t exist anymore, in a culture she had been forced to leave behind.

Alex stops scrubbing and looks at Kara with a piercing gaze. “Yeah. It’s some funny symbol too, like the way you used to write before you learned English. Did you do this to me?”

Alex leaps off the bed and crosses the room in two quick strides, arm held out like an accusation.

Kara shrinks in on herself a little but nods. “I think so. I didn’t know it was possible here, but well, on Krypton when your soul mate reveals themselves, a tattoo linking you appears. I should have one too, somewhere, if you do.”

Alex stops dead in her tracks, her eyes wide. “Soul mates? But we’re sisters! That’s so gross!”

Jumping up from the bed, hands held up in surrender Kara hastens to explain further. “No! Not like that, I promise! Back home, people had different kinds of soul mates. Sometimes it was the romantic kind like you talk about here on Earth, but other times it could just be a compatible soul, someone who was meant to be a part of you.”

Alex still looks wary, if not relieved, as she tentatively holds out her arm. “So, what does this mean? What kind of soul mates are we?”

Stepping forward Kara delicately traces the symbols on Alex’s forearm. “It literally means “sister of the soul.” Je shesur. The symbol after it is unique, the way we would know we were linked. If this had happened on Krypton it would mean we were soul sisters. Not from the same parents but family just the same.”

Alex nods. “And here on Earth? What does it mean here?”

“The same thing. At least that’s what it means to me.” Kara refuses to meet Alex’s eyes, not sure she wants to see what waits for her there.

There’s a long minute of silence after Alex takes her arm back. The clearing of her throat brings Kara’s eyes up from their place on the ground.

“Where’s yours?” Alex asks, eyes burning with curiosity.

Kara shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s not on my arms like yours is. It must be hidden. Can you look on my back?”

“Sure.” Alex nods. “Lift up your shirt.”

Kara turns and tugs her shirt up and over her head. It takes a moment, but she hears her sister gasp followed by the feel of fingertips against her left shoulder blade.

“It’s the same as mine.” Alex says reverently, and Kara closes her eyes against the emotion welling up there.

Who would have thought she would get to have this piece of home?

“So, I guess I’m stuck with you. For like, ever, huh?” Alex smiles once Kara has turned back around.

Kara grins back. “Yeah, I guess so.”

Alex shrugs. “Could be worse. But you have to tell Mom about this, because she’ll never believe me, and she is going to be pissed that I have a tattoo.”

“Sure, I can tell Mom.” Kara grins, a piece of her heart settling in place. She hasn’t felt at home on Earth, not really, but at this moment she feels like it isn’t all that bad.

--

The next person to get a tattoo is, interestingly enough, James.

It doesn’t come when they’re dating, or whatever it was that they were doing, no.

It comes after he has revealed himself to be Guardian, and he and Kara have the biggest fight of their friendship.

Kara wakes up the morning after tired, groggy, and more than a little cranky. Its as she’s stripping down to get in the shower that she notices it – the Kryptonese scrawled along the inside of her right bicep.

Throniv Shesur. Protector of the soul.

Kara heaves a deep, deep, sigh and grabs her phone.

She meets James at the DEO, both tentative around each other after the yelling match of the day before.

“So. I woke up with a tattoo. Kryptonese. Any idea what that’s about?” James looks smug, like he’s won some kind of battle with Kara and god, at that moment she wishes they were in the training room and she could just punch him.

“Yeah. I did too. It means “protector of the soul.” She crosses her arms against her chest, desperately trying to hold onto her anger from yesterday but the wide grin on James’ face is making it hard.

“I know. I asked Clark first thing since I figured you’re still pissed at me. He was a little surprised, but he translated it for me.”

“Where’s it at?” Kara asks, still pretending to be upset but truthfully it was hard given the glaring message from home telling her that James was meant to be Guardian. That they were meant to protect each other. Protect others together.

“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” James says with a waggle of his eyebrows and that’s what finally breaks Kara, a laugh ringing out across the room.

It wasn’t who she expected to have a tattoo, not in this way at least, but if it had to be anyone, she’s glad it’s James.

--

Mon-El doesn’t get a tattoo. Kara wishes she were more disappointed.

--

The last person to get a tattoo is someone Kara had desperately hoped both would and would not get a tattoo.

For a long time, she feared what that tattoo would be, if it were to happen. She feared having to explain it, having to explain herself.

She had checked with Clark a few times, when paranoia would get the better of her.

No, he always told her. Lex did not have a tattoo. They were enemies, yes, but it hadn’t been decided by destiny or fate. It just was.

That mollified Kara because she couldn’t stand it if she and Lena were to become Clark and Lex. She would fight against it, fight against fate to keep it from happening.

And then, well. It kind of happens anyways.

They aren’t enemies, not really. Lena just hates Kara and aims a few Kryptonite cannons at her and tries to mind control the entire planet, but really everyone is allowed a brief lapse of their sensibility, right?

And what matters is she came around, in the end.

It did take time, however, for them to build back to what they once had. It was different now, but in the way that things once broken and fixed usually are.

It was better, if anything.

They were back to shared lunches and dinners, quick breakfasts and coffee breaks. They were back to game nights as partners and movie nights as friends, and the occasional sleepovers as best friends.

Things were finally back to normal, so of course Kara had to go and absolutely, irrevocably, mess it up.

It was Alex’s fault, really.

If she hadn’t said anything, if she hadn’t asked Kara what was up between her and Lena lately, Kara probably never would have stopped to think about it.

She never would have stopped to think about the way her heart sped up when Lena entered a room, or the way her palms got sweaty when they hugged, or the way she just could not stop staring at Lena when she laughed at game nights.

But now she had thought of it and had come to the very scary conclusion that she was in love with her best friend.

Her best friend who didn’t have a tattoo.

She would, after all this time, have a tattoo, the tattoo, if they were meant to be together, right?

Kara mulls it over for weeks. It haunts her. She asks Lena about tattoos, and if she has any.

She learns that yes, in fact Lena does have tattoos and boy howdy one of them is on her lower back and it is seared into the back of her eyes now that she has seen it.

But she doesn’t have any kryptonian tattoos, which is really what Kara was aiming for.

Much like it was Alex’s fault that Kara even realized she was in love, it’s also Alex who reminds Kara of one important detail.

“Well I didn’t get my tattoo until after I punched what’s his face. Maybe you have to tell Lena how you feel and then she’ll get the tattoo.”

Kara feels dumb struck, right there on her own couch, because of course, Alex is right.

The tattoos always come after the person has already revealed themselves.

Then of course comes the true fear: what if she tells Lena and she still doesn’t get a tattoo?

That’s the question she’s mulling over the next night as she and Lena sit on her couch watching some documentary that had been put on Netflix.

Lena looks beautiful, face bare of makeup, hair piled on top of her head in a messy bun, glasses slipping down her nose.

She’s eating a piece of pizza, a rare treat after a long week of work, and Kara decides that it doesn’t matter if Lena doesn’t get a tattoo.

She’s hopelessly, desperately in love with the woman and she can’t let a tattoo that may or may not come dictate her life.

“I’m in love with you, you know.” Kara blurts out, like this isn’t a life changing moment, like it’s the easiest thing in the world to say. (It is.)

Lena chokes a little on the bite she was swallowing, her hand coming up to her chest as she sets down the slice.

“Excuse me?”

Kara laughs. She’s never felt more free than in this moment. “I’m in love with you. I just thought you should know.”

Lena looks at her, shock written all over her face. “Oh. I guess that’s good.”

“Just good?” Kara nudges Lena’s thigh with her knee.

Lena shakes her head. “I mean it’s more than good, considering I’m in love with you too.”

“Yeah?” Kara could float up to the moon, she thinks.

Lena smiles, nose crinkled. “Yeah.”

It’s the next morning that Lena calls and asks if Kara can stop by. She has this tattoo she didn’t have yesterday, right on her ribcage, and it looks like it’s Kryptonian.

Kara frantically searches her own body, finding the script on her hip, on the left side.

Zhao Shesur. Love of the soul.

It took them five years to get to this point, but Kara knows, this moment was more than worth the wait.