#gonna use this as icon after christmas!

[tidemoonchild]

Chickenrannosaurus-Rex & Me

Or maybe Gallusaurus-Rex? Gallurannosaurus-Rex...

The amazing @indoraptorgirlwind made this sweet and amazing pictures for me! And omg I love it so much! It's so awesome and I'm so happy right now! This made my day so much better!

Thank you so much for this.

[joeys-babe]

Joey B Imagines: Merry Christmas, Goofball

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Summary: Joe gets an extra gift at his family Christmas!

(Tiny part two to - Part 1)

Warnings: Fluff

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

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December 27, 2023

(Joe’s pov)

The past two days had been boring, empty, quiet, and all the negative adjectives.

I made the drive down to Athens today for Christmas with my family.

We were having it two days after Christmas to accommodate my brother’s having to go to their in-laws.

It was just going to be the same as last year, watching the kids play, and adult couples sit at the table while drinking wine together.

I fit in with neither group. So I either sat on the couch to watch a football game, or I'd sneak off to my old bedroom and play video games.

Whatever the plan ended up being, I was going to try to get away from this scene.

After all the grandkids opened presents from my mom and dad, it was my time to drift away from the group.

I grabbed a trash bag and gathered all of the wrapping paper and empty gift bags.

When the trash bag was full, I snuck into the kitchen and laid It by the backdoor to be taken out.

Once I did a quick look around and knew no one was watching, I opened the basement door, but before I could reach a foot out for the first step, I felt a huge hand on my shoulder.

Immediately, my shoulders dropped. I'd been caught.

“Not this year.” - Jimmy

I turned around to see my dad and gave him a sheepish smile.

“Sorry…” - Joe

“Don't apologize, son. I know it’s awkward since y/n can’t be with you.” - Jimmy

“Yeah, it really is. I don't fit in with the kids obviously, but I don't want to be the only adult in there without a partner with them.” - Joe

“Your mom and I are sorry for making you feel left out, so we got you an extra gift.” - Jimmy

“Huh?” - Joe

“It's on the front porch.” - Jimmy

I gently pushed past my dad and walked through the sea of people, making a beeline for the front door.

Out of nowhere, everyone fell silent, like they were anticipating my reaction.

After giving everybody a confused glare, I opened the door.

My heart stopped when my eyes fell on my extra gift.

“Baby?!” - Joe lept forward and grabbed you

I held her as tight as possible and spun her around, still trying to understand how and why this was happening.

“Hi, Joey.” - you giggled

Her legs were wrapped around my waist as I held her up in my arms.

“What are you doing here?” - Joe

I sat her back down on the ground, my arms never leaving her waist.

“You think I'm not gonna visit my boyfriend when he's in Athens? You were like thirty minutes away instead of two hours, couldn't pass on seeing your smiling face.” - you

“Shit, I didn't even think of that. I was so busy moping around that I forgot I was actually in Athens, where you are.” - Joe

She playfully rolled her eyes before pressing a long kiss to my lips.

Suddenly, there was a voice coming from behind us.

“I see you found your gift. Hi y/n!” - Robin

I smiled at my mom before y/n hugged her, they pulled away, and y/n said something to her.

“Thank you for inviting me, Robin.” - you

“Oh of course sweetie! He’s been walking around depressed like Eeyore from Winnie-the-Pooh all day. I knew you were the only thing capable of making him smile.” - Robin

y/n laughed and I felt myself blushing, not just from embarrassment but also from that gorgeous laugh.

“He loves you so much.” - Robin whispered

I know my mom attempted to whisper, so only y/n could hear… but she failed miserably, and I heard anyway.

“I love him too… so much.” - you told Robin

“Good.” - Robin smile

A few seconds of silence went by before my mom spoke up again.

“Well, I won't bother you guys… feel free to sneak off to the basement like you do every year, Joe. Enjoy your time together!” - Robin smiled before walking away

When she walked away, y/n and I embraced once again before I took her hand and led her toward the basement.

“Am I gonna see the iconic Star Wars room, Joey?” - you

“How do you know about that?” - Joe grinned

“I watch your interviews.��� - you shrug

“Stalker.” - Joe scoffed jokingly

“At least I didn't ask a nineteen-year-old out when I was twenty-six.” - you mumbled

I stopped so abruptly that she crashed into my back.

“What’s that supposed to mean? Think I shouldn't have?” - Joe

“What? No! I was just joking.” - your eyes went wide

“Don’t joke about that shit! It's not funny.” - Joe

Grimacing when I realized I raised my voice, I watched y/n’s body language change completely.

“Sorry…” - you looked down

“Wait… I'm sorry. I shouldn't have raised my voice. I didn't mean to, baby…” - Joe

“It’s okay. I won't joke about it again. I was playing around and didn't think you'd take it seriously, but I should've known.” - you

“Can we just drop it? I don't want to argue right now.” - Joe looked at you with sincere eyes

“I’d love that. Can we just chill downstairs and cuddle?” - you

“I thought you'd never ask.” - Joe grinned

——

After an hour of cuddling and watching a movie, y/n and I went back upstairs to find my family getting the gingerbread house kits out.

“Oh, hell no.” - you mumbled

“We can go back downstairs.” - Joe laughed

“Can we please? I have beef with gingerbread houses.” - you

I laughed realizing she copied my line about dry ingredients from a few days ago, and took her hand to go back down to my room.

“Uncle Joe!” - Joe’s nephew

Turning around to see my little nephew, I wondered what he wanted.

“Yup?” - Joe

“Look.” - Joe’s nephew

The five-year-old pointed to the doorframe above me and y/n, where a mistletoe hung.

I looked at y/n with a big smile, and we both shrugged at the same time before leaning in to kiss each other.

Because I wasn't a fan of PDA, we haven't ever kissed in front of someone. Other than y/n’s family watching through the windows when I dropped her off.

But right now, as everyone whistled and watched us kiss under the mistletoe, I'd never felt so happy.

We pulled away from each other after a solid minute, with huge grins on our faces from ear to ear.

“Merry Christmas, baby.” - Joe

“Merry Christmas, goofball.” - you laughed

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Authors note: I felt like the fic needed a second part…. CHRISTMAS FICS ARE OFFICIALLY DONE.

This came from my own head! 🫶

Hope you enjoyed! 💕

[tieronecrush]

hot & heavy

epilogue: our love is going gold

neighbor!joel x f!reader

series masterlist

series rating: E (18+ MDNI)

series summary:

over the course of three summers, joel miller becomes woven into your life. the first summer is spent falling for him; nannying his daughter and sneaking around with him in a burning love affair. you know how you feel about joel, he isn’t so sure about how it all is gonna work. the second summer is brief. a month spent at home after graduation and before you move to boston for your dream job. one look at you, one time hearing your voice, and joel is hooked again. he pines over you for that month, but you think — how is long distance of over a thousand miles going to work for a single dad? the third summer, you return home burnt out and pride bruised from your post-grad life. you need time to feel at home again, like your complete self, so you’ve come back home with no return ticket booked. it’s only a matter of time before joel seeks you out, slowly spending more time with you. without an inevitable end to the summer looming over you both, what chances are you willing to take?

word count: 17.2k (but she's done. like done, done.)

warnings (**SPOLIERS**): NO OUTBREAK (don’t need to worry about the mushies), no use of y/n, inexperienced reader, age gap (joel is 30/31, reader is 22), canon-divergent (sarah is now 10 y/o), nanny au, pet names (sweetheart, darling, sweet girl, mariposa, etc.), established relationship, engagement, marriage, alcohol, eating, very lovey romantic, polite southern manners, spanish/spanglish cause joel is latino, soft joel, domestic joel, WIFE!! GUY!! JOEL!!, discussion of parenting, step-parenting, struggles with conceiving, negative self talk and image, smut, soft dom joel, fingering, oral (f receiving), joel worships the ground his wife walks on and also her body, praise, unprotected p in v (they're tryna get pregnant, not you!), breeding kink, sort of nursing kink? joel is briefly obsessed with your tits and makes comments, mating press, a flash of cumplay, the BRIEFEST mention of daddy kink, joel really wants to give his wife a baby, pregnancy, a mention of giving birth, girl dad joel, CUTE FAMILY!!!

also this is the song mentioned <3 it's a fave of mine and i think very joel & mari

a/n: this has been a doozy but happy to hand this over to y'all. this is simply what i envisioned for their future, and if you had different thoughts, i would love to hear them! <3 or if you have any headcanons for their life beyond this, drop them in my inbox! this fic and these characters are my children and i love them very much. will probably keep them alive somehow. and thank you to everyone who's read this series, you are all so special to me and have sincerely made me feel so much more confident in my writing!

as always, thank you thank you thank you @northernbluess for beta-ing, couldn't do it without you! and this extremely long ending is dedicated to el and kiwi @kiwisbell you are my hype people fr

i feel like i need to say like signing off on h&h now lol so this is me doing that & closing the book!

** this is set over three additional summers post-main story **

first of many

After the holidays, it was an easy decision to move in with Joel and Sarah. The Millers had joined your family for their annual, lowkey celebrations; spending Christmas Eve with Joel and Sarah, it was a treat to witness him playing Santa after Sarah had gone to bed. Only a few curses under his breath putting together the new dollhouse she’d requested from St Nick, the other presents from her father, and your gifts to her carefully wrapped under the tree. The two of you split the plate of cookies while watching A Christmas Story, you and Joel taking turns mumbling the words to the iconic scenes under your breaths.

The next morning, your heart was overwhelmed with the love that you hold for this family that has welcomed you in and made you a part of it. Sarah gifted you a photo frame that she’d made at school, painted with flowers and butterflies, and a photo of the three of you from the trip to the apple orchard you’d taken that fall. Once Sarah was occupied with her new treasures, gifts were exchanged between you and Joel. Requesting to gift first, you stand up from the couch and tiptoe around Sarah and her new dolls sprawled across the floor to the front hall closet and retrieve a brand new, custom acoustic guitar. 

Sitting back with him, guitar placed into his hands and his eyes combing over it, his lips part with a gasping breath when he notices in the inlay of ‘SME’ for his daughter’s name, Sarah Elena.

“The old one in the corner of your room was lookin’ a little worse for wear, and I hadn’t seen you play it in a while…” you trail off in the silence, waiting for his response, “Do you—do you like it? Is it the right kind? I tried to match it the best I could to the one upstairs.”

“Oh, Mari baby, I love it. It’s beautiful, thank you so much…” He shakes his head, taking another sighing exhale in appreciation as he turns it in his hands. “Hadn’t played the other one 'cause it wasn’t quite playable anymore. Restrung it a few too many times, the wood was warped from some water damage. The perils of having a toddler around years ago. This is…it’s perfect, Mariposa.”

You beam, shifting in your seat and anxiously fiddling with your fingers. Joel sets the instrument down next to him carefully, turning back to you. He leans in, kissing you delicately and whispering another ‘thank you’ against your lips, “Guess m’gonna have to serenade you now.”

“Oh, yeah, J. I expect one nightly,” you playfully respond, kissing him again before he pulls away, his turn to stand from his place on the couch. 

He wanders over to the tree, plucking the last wrapped gift from under it, and returning to sit next to you. Handing over the small rectangular box, you unwrap it gingerly, glancing at Joel’s knee bouncing. You gently set your hand on it, smiling at him which he returns, biting his lip to channel his jittery energy. Opening the box, you’re met with the shining gold links of a beautiful charm bracelet. Your eyes wander over the small icons, feeling your chest tighten with love as you take them all in: A small ‘S’ with a ruby-colored stone at each end of the curve, a matching ‘J’ with a sapphire embedded into it right next to the ‘S; there’s a tiny gold key, nearly identical to the one he had given to you those three summers before for your job that started it all; a tiny set of longhorn antlers that is reminiscent of home; a lighthouse that reminds you of one you visited while living in Boston, a day you had documented and sent Joel some of the photos in the mail to recap your time. It was a day you had been happy there, and it made your heart ache that he remembered that. The last charm on the bracelet is a butterfly, bejeweled with kelly green stones, the color of the leaves that you told him were your favorite years ago. The ache in your chest is worked out of its knot with Joel’s hand at your back, a gasping breath as you blink back tears.

Clearing your throat, your watery smile has a flash of worry crossing his eyes before you hand him the bracelet you’ve taken out of the box, lightly requesting, “Will you put it on for me?”

Joel nods shyly, taking the dainty piece in his hands, and hooking the clasp around your wrist after a few tries. You both admire it, your smile growing wider and his matching yours.

“Merry Christmas, Mari baby. I love you.”

“Merry Christmas, J. I love you, too.”

Now, months later, the bracelet on your wrist glints in the sun as you hold onto Sarah’s hand, letting her lead you around the atrium filled with butterflies. Spending the day at the same farm you three had visited summers ago, and had kept up with the tradition with the summers following, you picked an abundance of strawberries, wandered through the nature paths, and now ending the day at the youngest Miller’s favorite spot.

Sarah wildly points out the different types of butterflies, the encyclopedia book of the insect’s species that you had gifted her for Christmas coming in handy for today as she reads the small signs of each patterned, winged creature, adding in her tidbits that she remembers. A grin stays plastered on your face as you listen intently, paying no mind to Joel trailing behind the two of you.

Giving your lessons on the flora that you know of in the gardens, Sarah listens to you as well. Stopping in front of the small waterfall, surrounded by tropical plants and flowers, the two of you go back and forth in fun facts about plants and butterflies, unaware as Joel saddles up behind you. Sarah glances back over her shoulder and grins, the expression reading as knowing and mischievous. Before turning around, you start to warn Joel behind you playfully, “J, if you’re even thinking about pushing me or splashing me, I will ki—”

Your breath catches when you finally face him, eyes dropping to meet his; the backpack he’d be adamant about carrying all day is at his feet, unzipped, and in his hands is a small, forest-green velvet box. Joel rests on one knee, a soft but bright, devoted smile on his face.

“Oh my god…” It comes from your lips as a whisper, your free hand reaching up to cover your mouth while the other continues to tether you to Sarah at your side, her small giggle hitting your ears as Joel glances at her, sending her a wink.

Eyes back on your face, Joel clears his throat, adjusting himself on his knee as he takes a deep breath, “I have been trying to figure out exactly what to say, and I can’t seem to find quite the right words that tell you exactly how I feel about you. I love you, so much, Mariposa. The second you entered my life, that time I saw you for only seconds in your backyard while I was touring the house, I knew I had to meet you. And then the first time I met you, well, I knew that you were who I needed.

“I’ve been walking around blind, trying to figure out life for years, and moving next door to you, that was the last piece falling into place. You have made my life, and Sarah’s life, a million times better. And while these past few years haven’t been picture-perfect for us, we made it through, and I know that we can take on anything that comes our way. Eres el alma más hermosa que he conocido, y soy muy afortunada de tenerte. (You are the most beautiful soul I have ever met, and I am so lucky to have you.) I’ve been waiting for years to do this, Mari baby, and I can’t have any more summers pass by without you being mine. Tú eres mi media naranja. (You’re my soulmate.) I love you. Te amo, Mari. You’re my soulmate, sweet girl, and I can’t take another day without the promise of forever. Will you marry me, Mariposa?”

Without hesitation, you nod your head frantically, your tears that started falling as soon as Joel started speaking continue to flow. You uncover your mouth, squeezing Sarah’s hand and sharing a smile with her before she takes her hand away.

“Yes, oh my gosh, Joel…of course, of course, I’ll marry you. I love you so much, J.” You squat down in front of him, left hand trembling as you hold it out for him. He carefully takes the ring from the box, and Sarah, ever the helper, takes it from the spot where it rests on his knee for safekeeping. The delicate gold band slips onto your finger, embellished with clusters of tiny gems and centered with an emerald cut diamond. It’s perfectly you, and you can’t wipe the smile off your face as you watch Joel settle the piece of jewelry on your finger. Both of you take a deep breath, admiring the sight before your eyes find each other’s again, matching expressions of complete admiration. Your hands find his cheeks, pulling him in for a tenderly passionate kiss, attempting to breathe all the love in your chest into the kiss and his heart. Joel pulls away first, resting his forehead against yours for a quiet moment.

“Thank you, J,” you whisper, and his head tilts with curiosity.

“For what, baby? I think I should be thankin’ you for sayin’ yes to me.” He chuckles and rubs his thumb at the back of your hand, skimming next to the band of the new addition.

“Everything. For not giving up. Your patience when I was still finding my way back to you. How effortlessly you’ve welcomed me into your life and your family…” Cheating your body away, one hand reaches out to pull Sarah into the small huddle, reuniting the moment within your unit of three, “I just—I can’t wait for all my summers to be spent with you both.”

“I can’t wait either. This is gonna be the first of many, Mari baby.”

And the two of you really couldn’t wait.

Only a week after Joel was down on one knee, your family was throwing you an engagement party. Tommy, a few of Joel’s close friends from his contracting company, your college friends, and neighbors were all in attendance to celebrate the two of you, and it was a big to-do. Drinks flowing, music playing, and food was being passed around. Everything under the warmth of a Texas night and the strung lights across the stretch of your parents’ backyard. Joel was glued to your side the entire night, hand on your back or clasped in yours, grabbing your refills and whispering in your ear to make you laugh.

“So…are all of these people coming to the wedding? ‘Cause I can count about half that I have no idea who they are.”

To that, you whispered back, “I don’t know them either, so definitely not. Unless they wanna buy us the most expensive thing on the registry.” Joel laughed, squeezing you closer — if it were even possible — and pressing a kiss to your temple.

Later, once you two were far past tipsy, Joel mumbled against your ear, barely able to get the words out without drunkenly giggling himself, “D’you think Mrs. Clarke is thinkin’ m’the one that got away?”

You couldn’t contain your laughter, bursting out in the middle of the conversation happening around you two, quickly covering your mouth as the lingering hiccups escape, “I think she’s singin’ the blues about you, Miller.”

The rest of the evening was filled with small moments between the two of you; never left alone long enough to have a full conversation on your own. Whispers of love and affection breathed out, fleeting kisses exchanged. It wasn’t until the party was over, everyone dwindled out the door and back to their homes, that you and Joel took a beat to speak to each other in more than one sentence. The early hours of the morning had crept in without anyone quite noticing, and Sarah was knocked out, brought inside to sleep in your old bedroom around 10pm when she couldn’t keep her eyes open anymore. Joel now held her in his arms, her head laying on his shoulder while the three of you walked the short distance home. After your quiet goodnight to Sarah that went unheard by her sleeping self, Joel put her down, taking off her shoes and leaving her undisturbed to sleep in her clothes.

Back in the ensuite of your, now, shared bedroom, you’re lazily getting ready for bed, movements slower and lagging from the alcohol you consumed. Joel stands behind you, facing your reflection in the mirror and giving you a smile as the exhaustion catches up to him.

“You have fun tonight, sweet girl?” His vocal cords rub together in a fry, hands finding their place on your waist and drawing you back into his chest. Littering kisses at the back of your neck, he hums contently before you affectionately shoo him off to brush his teeth while you apply your skincare.

“‘Course I did, J. Spent most of the night with you, how could I not have fun?” You grin at him from in front of your side of the double sinks, gently rubbing in your moisturizer. “Have you given any thought as to when you wanna set a date for?”

Whatever he responds is muffled by the foamy toothpaste, your face twisting in confusion before he leans over and spits out, rinsing his mouth and toothbrush. Standing back up, he rests his hip against the countertop while facing you, shrugging as he smirks slightly, “As soon as possible. Baby, I’d get married to ya in a garbage dump if it meant we could get married right this second. No puedo esperar para hacerte mi esposa. (Can’t wait to make you my wife.) And I know you don’t want that, and I want to make you happy, so whenever you want, Mari. Lo que sea que desees, lo haré realidad. (Whatever you wish for, I’ll make a reality.) But I will say, summer’s kind of our thing.”

A gentle smile stretches across your lips as you step closer, hands coming to rest on his chest and massaging your fingers gently into the muscles there, “Well, how about we do this summer? I mean, I don’t want anything fancy, just something special for us. Thought maybe we could do it here, in our backyard and my parents’. Where we met and fell in love and broke up and fell in love again and—”

“I love that idea, sweetheart. Think it’s perfect for us…” Joel punctuates his work by stealing a kiss, mint and strawberry lip balm melting on his tongue when he deepens it only for a few seconds, “Think we can manage for Labor Day weekend, mi amor?”

Nodding confidently, your hands skate up to his shoulders, pulling him down for another kiss, “I believe we just set our wedding date, Miller.”

“Damn right, we did, Miller.”

A whirlwind of planning and three months later, you now stand in your childhood bedroom on the second floor of your parent’s house, admiring yourself in the full-length mirror standing in the corner. Your mom had helped you with your hair, a small gold barette holding one side away from your face; your makeup was fairly minimal, fresh, and bright, but nothing too heavy that would melt in the heat that has graced Austin this weekend.

On your wrist is your charm bracelet from Joel, a simple gold locket to match that your father had gifted you the evening before at the rehearsal dinner — it has belonged to his grandmother, and now your grandma wanted you to have it since she couldn’t make the trip down due to her age. It was your ‘something old’ he said, playing into the old traditions that seemed to charm your entire family. 

Your ‘something borrowed’ was a pair of white strappy sandals from your mom, ones that she had worn to her rehearsal dinner when she married your dad. The title of ‘something new’ belonged to the charm hanging off of your wrist that was hand-delivered to you this morning from Tommy, per the request of Joel since you both were getting ready in opposite houses. The gift box unveiled a gold lotus flower, hand painted with deep magenta petals. Inside the lid of the box was a folded note, the words written by your soon-to-be husband in his usual scrawl.

Mi amor,

Got to reading one of your books you leave around about plants, and they were talking about the lotus flower. Made me think of you — since they go back to the murky water each evening and open their blooms at the break of day. You always start fresh, sweet girl, you’re so resilient and strong and pure of heart. No matter what happens, you get through it. And you won’t have to go at it alone, baby. I’m gonna be right there with you through anything.

You make me a better man.

Te amo, mi media naranja.

J

You had to touch up your makeup after having read the note over and over for minutes straight, now fresh faced and eager to get downstairs. One last time in the mirror, you give yourself the once over, smoothing the long, full skirt of your linen dress. The ruched empire bodice lays across your chest, framing your neck with a square shape along with the cap sleeves. Simple, but it feels perfectly you. And now, you were finally on your way to get your something blue: Joel in his navy suit, waiting at the end of the aisle for you.

Everyone’s gathered in their seats, only a crowd of around forty people from your lives occupying the rows, all carefully selected to make the cut. It was easy for Joel, he had three people he wanted there for sure, and well, his daughter didn’t have a choice living right next door, plus with her dad being the groom, and you being the bride. The only chance of a wild card he had was Tommy, but he was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this morning despite the many shots he had the night prior. At the rehearsal dinner of all places.

Dressed and gaffed, he stands at the end of the short aisle after having walked down it hand-in-hand with Sarah, who was donning a lilac dress she picked out with your help and her hair in her natural, bouncy curls. She now sits next to Tommy in the front row, whose new girlfriend Maria is sitting on the other side of him, stealing peeks over the back of the seat to try to catch a glimpse of you at the top of the deck stairs. Joel is doing the same, eyes flickering from scanning over the crowd to tunneling at the opening of the stairs. 

Music starts and it immediately tunes out of his ears, a tingle of excitement radiating from his chest throughout his body. A vision in white, you appear at the stairs with your arm linked to your dad, Mark; he isn’t paying attention to anything but you, captivated by your beauty. His heartbeat kicks up when you walk down, reaching the end of the grassy path between rows of chairs, and stopping for a moment. With the bouquet in one hand, you use the other that was resting on your dad’s arm to give him a short wave that he returns with a grin.

Each step you take brings up tears in his eyes, an overwhelming joy clenching around his heart. A few drop down his cheeks, using one of his thumbs to wipe away the streaks as you give him a gentle smile, speeding up your walk and dragging your dad along with you. The guests laugh at the eagerness, Joel rocking on the balls of his feet as he bites back his wild grin when you finally reach him. Exchanging hugs with your dad, Mark shakes Joel’s hand before clapping him on the back, a sure nod directed to him.

His hand slips into yours naturally, helping you with the last few steps to stand in front of him, exhaling a deep breath. A smile that he can’t wipe off stretches across his face, looking into your eyes as he lifts a hand to wipe his cheeks. You do the same, delicate touch against his skin while your gaze stays trained on his. Beating out of his chest, his heart thumps deeply, the wings of his butterfly fluttering madly in his gut in time with his heartbeat.

“Hey, Mari.”

“Hi, J.”

Everyone settles back in their seats, and your brother stands at the makeshift altar, a carved arbor handmade by Joel over the last few months frames the three of you in front of your guests. You turn to hand off the wildflower bouquet you put together to Sarah, eager to fulfill her responsibility of holding it during the ceremony. She grins, whispering to you loud enough for him to hear when she takes the arrangement.

“You look so pretty, Posey. I’m excited for you to marry Daddy.” Your hand reaches for her curls, squatting down in your dress to address her at eye level, unconditional love shining in your eyes as you look at his daughter.

“You look beautiful, Sare Bear. I’m so excited, too.” Other words are exchanged only between the two of you, a hug shared before Sarah retreats to her chair next to Tommy and you stand up and take Joel’s hands.

Chris ambles through an introduction, recollecting his version of events, as well as both of your sides, for how your relationship has progressed. Humor was laced throughout, laughter bubbling over throughout the crowd of guests, and especially between the two of you when you shared knowing expressions.

The ceremony moves quickly, with no religious elements to extend the length, simply secular. Before he knows it, Chris is reaching the vows, allowing a moment for Tommy to present the rings to each of you, clapping a hand on his brother’s back.

“Don’t fuck this one up, brother. Posey’s a good ‘un. Way too good for you—”

Joel cuts him off with a mumble and an eye roll, “I know all of this, Tommy, but thank you for the reminder.”

Chris directs Joel to go first, a deep inhale and extended exhale fills the air as you give his hands a reassuring squeeze. He flashes a smile at you before he drops one of your hands, finishing in his inside jacket pocket for the small slip of paper.

“I tried to memorize this, but we both know that wasn’t gonna happen…” he huffs out a nervous chuckle, reading over the page before his eyes come back to you, a patient and gentle grin on your face, “I genuinely hope you know how much I love you. I try to show you, to tell you, to make you feel it through osmosis every day, but I truly hope you can feel it. Through all that we have been through together and on our own, I have always had you in my mind. I thought about you every day you were away, and all I was hoping for was your happiness. I cannot tell you what it means that you have found your happiness with me, but I will be thanking whatever forces are out there for bringing us back together. Our roads may have been bumpy, and they may be in the future, but I’m so thankful to have you in my passenger seat. Cause we both know you don’t like to drive.” Joel winks and the crowd of guests laugh.

“I never want to let go. And I’m never going to let you go, Mariposa, I’m in it for the long run.  Eres todo para mí. (You are everything to me.) You are everything I have ever asked for, hoped for, didn't think I deserved. You are…un alma tan pura (such a pure soul) and I don't know how you ended up with me, but I'm countin’ my luck every second of every day. I love you through anything, mi Mariposa, and I cannot wait for our future together, as a family. I’m so happy that you have found a place you belong with Sarah and me, and I feel so lucky that you have chosen me. Te amo, mi Mariposa. Siempre.”

Recovering from your tears, you choke out a small sob that tugs on his heartstrings, tightening his grip on your hand while his brow furrows softly in concern.

“Happy tears, I promise, J. Very happy tears.” Another sob comes with a burst of laughter, a hand of yours fanning your face. Joel reaches up, wiping away the stragglers, careful to not smudge any of your mascara. With a deep breath, you focus back, centered, offering Joel your left hand. He repeats the phrase from Chris, who recites it from his printed-out online ordainment course before slipping the simple matching gold band onto your finger above your engagement ring, ears ringing when he sees the symbol of his love and commitment on your finger, where it will stay for the rest of his time on this Earth.

Next, it was your turn to recite your vows, Chris pulled a piece of paper from his jacket and handed it to you. A giggle slips from your lips, wavering the small folded sheet, “Couldn’t memorize it either. Got too much to say…”

Joel relaxes in his stance, thumb circling the back of your palm as he listens, the butterfly wings fluttering into his chest and up to his head, love overwhelming his nervous system across his body. You clear your throat, looking up from the wrinkled white sheet, “I didn’t know that one summer spent at home would completely send me on a whole new life path, but looking back, I am eternally grateful that I wanted to mooch off my parents for as long as possible. That first summer, I fell hard and fast, and despite the obstacles, my love continued to root deeper inside of me and grow out new branches with every memory we made together. I am so lucky to have been welcomed so easily into the Miller household, and I cannot imagine my life with you or Sarah there right next to me. You both have brought so much into my life and thanks to you, J, I feel like I have truly found myself. 

“I was always searching for what I was meant to do, who I was meant to be, and what I would leave behind in my life. And while I went out searching everywhere, the answer was my next-door neighbor. I am meant to be your person, I was meant to care and love and create a life with you, and your wonderful daughter, and I know I will leave behind all my love for you and our family behind. My success does not need to be measured by the reach of my impact, but by how deeply I love you. That is all that matters to me, to make you feel loved and supported and to know how incredible you are. You mean the world to me, and I love Sarah as if she were my own; both of you are my best friends and I could not do this life without you. I am so excited to spend the rest of my days, and the rest of my summers with you, J. I love you. Forever.”

The same routine goes for you, slipping a gold band around Joel’s left ring finger. He flexes with the new accessory on his hand, admiring it before he looks at you, a wide and wild grin crossing his face as he listens as Chris starts to ask him that very special question, “Joel, do you ta—”

“Absolutely I do. No question.”

Laughter rises from the attendees, and you, playfully roll your eyes. Chris nods shortly, chuckling as he turns to address you with the same question. He states your name, inquiring, “Do you ta—”

“Of course, I do. Only been waitin’ years for this to happen.” 

Joel laughs, shaking his head as he mumbles a sweet agreement, “You and me both, baby.”

Chris drops the papers he was reading from next to him on the grass, clasping his hands together, “Well, that made it damn easy for me. With the power vested in me by apparently the state of Texas, but who really knows, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Now y’all can kiss finally.”

A hand presses against the small of your back, pulling you into his chest as he folds down, latching your lips to his in a deep kiss, all of his love pouring into the moment. It takes restraint to not take it further in front of everyone, your intoxicating taste drawing him in and quenching a perpetual thirst he has. You lean back first, fingertips digging into his shoulders to hold him off as you whisper, “Gotta keep some decorum until tonight, Mr. Miller.”

“Hard to do that with you, Mrs. Miller,” he rasps back, matching blindingly bright grins across your faces as you right yourself, turning to face your guests as your brother loudly announces.

“For the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Miller!”

With the low-key, intimate wedding that you both had planned together, there was no real formal separation of the ceremony and reception. Instead, everyone wandered over to the backyard of Joel’s home, which was now yours, too. There were rented tables set up with chairs around, no seating chart, and a checkered dance floor set up in the middle of the lawn. Lights have been strung from his deck to the tree at the back of the property line that holds Sarah’s tire swing, some lanterns strewn about to add more light as the sun sets in the later evening. 

The family-favorite restaurant in the city that the three of you have frequented, even as friends, catered the meal, and your parents, ever so prepared, had stocked up all summer with booze. Your dad plays pretend bartender, getting your now-husband behind the tablecloth-covered folding table and pouring heavy drinks and somehow heavier shots. By sundown, everyone was liquored up enough to cheer for you both to have a first dance, chanting their request over and over.

Joel looks at you from his spot next to you, eyebrows raising in question. His hand at your back draws you closer, starting to sway to whatever song is playing as he grins with a looseness to him, relieved to have you as his for good and relaxed from the alcohol in his blood. “C’mon, Mari baby, I wanna dance with you. M’wife. I got the perfect song.”

“Okay, okay, you go tell Chris what song you want and see if he’s got it on his iPod.” 

You push Joel along, giggling to yourself as he shuffles over to Chris, the makeshift DJ for the evening. Joel leans in, talking in your brother’s ear over the music currently playing. They exchange a smile and nod, Joel laying a hand on his shoulder and shaking it affectionately. His beer gets abandoned on the nearest surface, giddily running over to you and taking your hand. Impatiently, he pulls you to the center of the dance floor, and Tommy intercepts your drink before it sloshes all over the front of you, huffing out a disbelieving breath as you continue to drag behind Joel.

Your husband turns you in his arms, one hand finding your back as the other lifts your joined ones toward his shoulder, elbows bent. Everyone else clears the dancefloor as an upbeat guitar riff sounds out of the speakers surrounding the dancefloor, the bright drums kicking in as Joel starts to shuffle the two of you around the dancefloor, a swing to your movements again.

The familiar lyrics of Orleans’ Still the One that Joel has sung to you many times over the last year are recited right back to you, making you reminisce about the time you were driving in the car to pick up Sarah from camp, a rare afternoon that both of you had off together. The song had come onto Joel’s favorite classic rock station, perking him up in his seat as he turned the volume dial up.

“Oh, Mari baby, this is such a great song.”

Not as familiar with it, you listen, giggling as he sings along with his words pointed at you, and you had to admit, they were pretty sickly sweet. Ever since then, Joel got into the habit of singing it to you, learning to play it after he received his new guitar from you at Christmas.

Dancing with him now, under the sticky heat of the tail end of Texan summer, surrounded by family and friends, he makes you feel as if it’s only the two of you again like it was for every other moment before with this same song.

In your ear, he sings along only for you, pulling away and twirling you as y’all take over the entire dancefloor with how free and loose you’re playing it. “You’re still the one that makes me laugh…still the one that’s my better half…we’re still havin’ fun and you’re still the one.”

At the next chorus, you join him in singing along, laughing at his excitement, both of you singing along louder. The song reaches the guitar solo, and Joel takes both of your hands, swinging you out from his chest before pulling you back in; he spins you to cross your arms in front of you, and your back to his chest before twirling you out. On the last line, when the final word is dragged out, he wraps his arms around you, spinning both of you around until the final chord strikes, setting you down and chests heaving to catch your breaths. Wide smiles still find your open mouths, cheers and whistles from the guests gathered around the dancefloor, now filling the checkered floor as the next song plays.

Breathless, Joel grins madly, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly before asking, “Think we did pretty damn good for unplanned, don’t you, Miller?”

“Damn right, we did, Miller.”

The rest of the evening was all the same, a night spent with your closest family and friends all celebrating the two of you and your love. Both you and Joel shared a dance with Sarah separately, relishing in her unbridled joy and Joel comforted his daughter when she shed a few tears about how happy she was. Your dad pulled you for a short jaunt around the dancefloor, and Joel asked your mom for a dance, which she accepted happily as a stand-in for his mom.

More drinks flowed into glasses and out of bottles, your shoes kicked off and Joel’s jacket and tie discarded onto the back of a chair somewhere. Your cheeks ached from how much you were smiling and laughing the whole time, a weight lifted, the promise of forever with your favorite person now on its way to being a reality.

You both ceremoniously cut the small single-tiered cake that your mom ordered, serving the slice on a plate. Grabbing a piece with your hands, you cheers it with Joel’s, watching as his went into his mouth and laughing as yours went across his cheek. He feigned shock, shaking his head as he looked at you with a glint of mischief in his eyes, taking a step closer. A turn on the ball of your foot directs you in an attempt to get away; failing miserably, misstepping from your level of drunkenness, Joel catches you in his arms. Turning you back around to face him, he steals a purposefully sloppy kiss, buttercream smearing against your lips and chin, the taste of vanilla coating your tongue as it melts into the taste of Joel, whiskey, beer, and sugary sweetness from the dessert.

At the very end of the night, most guests in cabs home or retreat to their homes down the street, it’s left to your closest people. The last song of the night is announced by Chris, the same song that has come up again and again for the two of you trilling over the speakers. Everyone dances and sings along to American Pie, the perfect cyclical moment for the two of you, and the closing moment of your summer. Sarah dances with the two of you, laughing as Joel twirls her around, infectious smiles on their faces. 

Your heart grows in your chest, nearly to the point of bursting as you take a step back in your mind, taking in all of the moment as it surrounds you. In the backyard of your new house, the next chapter of your life starts with Joel and Sarah; right next door is your childhood home, full of love and memories with your parents and brother. Even through the hardships, these places and people have never stopped feeling like home.

The song finishes with a flourish, Joel tucking you into his chest after he scoops Sarah into his arms with a soft groan. Sarah lays her head on her dad drowsily and he presses a kiss to her forehead, mirroring the same on yours; a mumble against your skin is barely heard by you, his drawl exaggerated by the liquor, “Mi Mariposa y mariposita. My lil’ Bug. Love my girls so much.”

Tommy slides sleepy Sarah into his arms from Joel after you two say goodnight to her, the younger Miller brother already prepared the arrangement for her to stay at his on the night of your wedding. You reassure her the promise to meet at Waffle House in the morning, which will likely be the afternoon with the state of the adults. Maria, the designated driver, and Tommy, much closer to sober than drunk than you were expecting, send another congratulations your way before they’re off to the car with Sarah.

After the necessary sweep of cleaning is done between you two and your immediate family, food, drink, and lanterns gathered, they part ways, taking everything back to theirs to deal with in the morning along with striking down the tables, chairs, and dancefloor. In the quiet of the early morning hours, you and Joel stand with your arms around each other, swaying gently. Cheek to chest, Joel’s voice rasps from overuse, vibrating your ear pressed against him, “Was it what you wanted, sweet girl?”

“Everything and more, J. I loved it,” you say as you pull your head away, tilting your chin to look into his eyes, “And I love you, m’husband.”

“I love you more, m’wife.” He shakes his head, biting a smile back, “Don’t think m’ever gonna get tired of callin’ you that, Mari.”

“Me neither. Gonna be callin’ you my husband instead of usin’ your name,” you flirt as your smirk grows and he wiggles his eyebrows, hand drifting down to the curve of your ass.

“Guess we better test that theory, baby.” He grins as he bends his knees, lifting you over his shoulder. His other hand rests on your ass to balance you, your hands pressing against his lower back as you shriek slightly from the initial shock. “Want the whole neighborhood to know m’your husband now. Even if they weren’t invited, so you better be loud, m’gorgeous wife.”

He walks you both up the stairs and through the backdoor, your snort echoing in the quiet of the night, pulling out the ol’ faithful from the early days with him, “Yes, sir.”

second nature

“What do you think about getting a dog?” you ask from your seat on the bed, propped up against the headboard with a book in your lap. Joel pops his head out from the en-suite, brow quirked as he continues to towel off his hair and laugh softly.

“Can’t say I’ve thought about it, darlin’.” He disappears again, hanging his towel on the back of the door before coming back out of the bathroom with a clean pair of boxers on, washed up from his long day on-site. “Have you been thinking about getting a dog?”

A sheepish grin stretches across your face, shrugging your shoulders as Joel gets into bed. He matches your position, leaning back against the headboard and turning his head toward you. He’s intrigued. If he wasn’t, he’d tell you that you could talk about it more in the morning, and then he would give you his honest opinion in the light of day. Never wanting to start a silly argument before bed, always attempting to keep the peace.

Which made him great at compromising. To what you wanted in the first place.

“I’ve been thinking it would be nice for Sarah. Like something to learn responsibility — teaching her to feed it on schedule and take it for walks and fill the water bowl.”

“Yeah, it’ll teach her that I’ll take on all those responsibilities when she gets bored of it,” your husband snorts at his own comment, making you roll your eyes playfully and scoot closer.

“Oh, c’mon, J. Don’t you think it would be fun to have a dog around? We wouldn’t even need to get a puppy if you think it’s too much. But I work at home nannying baby Amelia so I’d be around all day and then when Sarah gets home from school or camp, she can take him or her for a walk. And then feed it before you even get home. Oh! Or you could take the dog to work with you! How cute would that be, you could train him to grab your tools for you.” 

A contagious smile brightens your face in the low lamplight, one that Joel can’t help but mirror on his own face. The eagerness is evident in your expression and your voice, and the proposition doesn’t seem like it would be too difficult of an adjustment. Shaking his head at your suggestions, he laughs quietly while reaching a hair up to smooth your hair away from your face.

“Are you gonna be the one to teach it what all the different screwdrivers are?” 

An excited gasp exhales and you scramble to straddle Joel’s lap, “Wait, are you serious? You’re actually okay with getting a dog?”

Wrapping your arms around his shoulders, you lean back to look at his face. His hands find the curve where your thighs melt into your ass, squeezing gently. Always handsy.

“Yeah, baby, we can get a dog.” Joel groans dramatically when you pull yourself tight against him, hugging him while on hand rubs back and forth at the base of your spine. “I’ve got some conditions though.”

Unraveling from his neck, you stay perched in his lap, nodding fervently. “Anything. Whatever you want, if it means we get a dog.”

“Oh, anything?” he teases with another squeeze of your bum, laughing when you shoot him a look.

“Not what I meant, Miller. Get your mind out of the gutter.”

“Can’t help it with you, sweet girl. My mind’s always in the gutter around you.” The sentiment is punctuation with a tender kiss to your lips and one to your forehead. Calloused palms skate along your bare thighs, humming contently, “Conditions are: has to be a big dog. Don’t want one of those little white dogs or like something that’ll break if we have babies and they’re a little rough with it.”

The forethought he has for your future children warms your heart, and you agree immediately, “Deal. Didn’t want a little dog anyways. What else?”

“Gotta fence in the backyard. I don’t mind putting in a gate for us and your parents to easily go back and forth through, but I don’t want the chance of the dog gettin’ out when we’re all outside.”

“Totally understandable. I’ll even help you install the fence,” you offer proudly.

“That’s real sweet, Mari baby, thank you. You don’t gotta lift a finger though, I’ll bring some of the guys over and pay a little extra and we’ll get it done in a day, no problem.”

“Alright, so big dog, fence. Anything else you’d like to negotiate, Mr. Miller?” you mock a formal tone, turning your nose up. Joel laughs, tightening his arms around your waist and tugging you closer. Kisses press into your neck and along your jaw, pausing inches away from your lips as he makes his final request.

“Dog sleeps in Sarah’s room or downstairs. I like our privacy.” He smirks before kissing you deeply, easily flipping you onto your back and hovering above you. Your legs hook around his waist and he raises his eyebrows, “That all sound fair to you, Mariposa?”

“Absolutely it does. Guess we’re getting a dog, ri—” You’re cut off by his lips on yours again, pressing you further into the mattress with his body weight.

“Let’s save the rest of this for the morning,” Joel mumbles against your skin as he trails his mouth down your neck to your collarbone, “‘Cause right now, I think I’d rather get some pussy.”

He doubles over in laughter at his own joke, forehead pressing against your chest as his shoulders heave. Your fingers comb into his hair, unable to fight quiet chuckles of your own no matter how hard you try to not give him the satisfaction.

“God, you’re such a dork.”

The clock rolls to 3pm as you sit in your car, lined up along with parents of campers. Shrills of laughter and screams echo from the bright, primary-colored playground across the way, counselors attempting to corral the kids to lead them out for pick-up. Air conditioning blasts on you as you fan at the back of your neck, exhaling in the sweltering Texan heat. It’s only the beginning of summer, June barely having turned over, but the temperatures have reached record highs for the year already.

Your stepdaughter. The thought still makes you smile months on, the dynamic between the two of you falling naturally into a closer, more nurturing relationship. Little acknowledgments from Sarah have made your heart sing over the days; routinely saying goodnight to you along with Joel, asking you for permission to go play outside, seeking you out nearly as much as Joel when she has had a nightmare. The pair of you have built routines of your own before bed, you making a promise to Sarah to read with her and to show her your favorite books from when you were her age.

A few nights ago, Sarah had retreated with you to her room, at least thirty minutes before her bedtime to get in another chapter of Matilda by Roald Dahl. The main character reminded you of Sarah’s sweet and spunky personality, and you were so excited that she fell in love with the story and its characters as quickly as you did when you read it for the first time.

Sat up against her headboard, Sarah laid back in your arms and cracked open the novel where her bookmark stuck out, started to read aloud to you in the low lamplight. Mindlessly, you played with her hair as you listened to her confidently recite the words from the page. The day caught up to you, the peaceful moment pulled a yawn from your lungs. Sarah’s words slowed down, her eyes slowly blinking until they closed, which was your queue to slip the book from her hands and mark the spot, and laid it on her nightstand.

When you tried to slip out from behind her to leave her to sleep soundly, she stirred, mumbling the sweetest, “Will you stay for a little bit, Posey?”

And you had no choice but to oblige her request. After getting comfortable next to her, Sarah curled into your side and you pressed a kiss to her forehead, continued to play with her hair to soothe her back to sleep.

What you hadn’t realized was that you also drifted off in her twin bed with her, the lamp still on. Joel was watching TV downstairs, waiting for you to retreat down the steps as you do every night, but no sign of you after an hour had him standing up to go searching. It was quiet when he reached the top of the stairs, no telling giggles or loud whispers to give the two of you away. 

He pushed open the cracked door of Sarah’s bedroom, and was met with a sight that squeezed his heart tight, a sigh exhaled from his lungs. You tucked right next to his little one, and both slept deeply. Without disturbing your rest, he tiptoed over to the nightstand, tugged the blanket up over both of you before he hovered above the bed to press a gentle kiss to each of your foreheads. 

Lamp clicked off, he whispered to your unconscious ears, “G’night, girls. Love you two.”

It was a few hours before your usual alarm when you’d woken up, sore from the small space and glanced around the dark room to discover you had fallen asleep next to Sarah. Carefully slipped out from the covers, you tucked her back in and padded down the hall to your bedroom where Joel was sleeping, a soft snore came from him as he’d starfished out on the mattress. You gently shook him half awake to move him, and he groaned softly at the disruption before he tugged you into his chest and pressed a drowsy kiss to your shoulder.

“Was jus’ too cute to wake you up, Mari baby. My Mariposa and my lil’ Bug…” He hummed sleepily into your skin, hand gently rubbed circles in your lower belly while your eyes close, desperate for those last few hours of slumber. “Makes me so happy.”

“Me too, J. M’so, so happy she’s that comfortable with me. My baby best friend. And you’re my big baby best friend…” You breathed out an airy giggle and Joel protested weakly behind you, a gentle pinch to your side before you both exchanged a quick “love you” and drifted right back off.

The reminder of the sweet moment in the morning from Joel was the highlight of your week.

Climbing out of the car, the engine running and door open, you round the front bumper and stand on the curb to wait. You find her before she finds you, calling out to her to grab her attention, “Hey, sweet pea!”

Her familiar deep brown irises search for the source of your voice, landing on your face and waving excitedly. Sarah checks out with her counselor for the day, scurrying over to you with her backpack bouncing at her shoulders.

“Hi, Posey!”

She collides with your torso, her growth spurts finally starting over the last few months so the top of her head hits just at your chest, and nearly knocks the wind out of you. Patting her back, you laugh and pull her back to look her in the face, “Well, hello to you too, Sare Bear. How was camp today? You ready to go?”

After your greetings, she climbs into the backseat on the opposite side of Amelia’s car seat. You store her bag in the passenger seat with yours before retreating around to the driver’s side, heading off once both of you are secured in your seatbelts.

Flicking your eyes up in the rearview mirror, the two of you catch up, which mostly consists of her recapping the camp activities and excitedly talking about the pool day that’s planned for Friday. As you turn onto your street, Sarah’s brow furrows at the sight of Joel’s truck in the driveway.

“Dad’s home already? That’s weird.”

“Hm, I guess he is. Or maybe he’s just stopped by to grab something he forgot. You know how he is.”

Sarah laughs in agreement as you park your car next to his truck. Both of you get out and head in through the garage, straight into the kitchen where Joel’s standing at the counter eating a sandwich.

“Told you, Sare, stopped by ‘cause he forgot something. Lunch.” You send him a teasing grin as you deposit Sarah’s bag by the door and kick off your sandals. She does the same before wandering past her dad to the fridge in search of a snack. Apple doesn’t fall far.

“What? I can’t happen to drop in hoping to see my wife and my daughter in the middle of my work day? Do I have to have ulterior motives?” Joel speaks, words muffling around the bite in his mouth as you approach the island to stand opposite him.

“Dad, you literally always ask ‘What’s for dinner?’ or ‘What’s cookin’?’ after you say hi to us every day. Your motivation is always to get some food,” Sarah chimes in from in front of the fridge, laughing when Joel looks at her offended.

“See? Even a ten year old recognizes the pattern of behavior,” you confirm your findings, laughing as Joel grumbles to himself and pops the last bite of his sandwich in his mouth.

“Well, for your information, both of you, I am here for an entirely different reason than lunch and to see you two.” He crosses his arms in front of his chest, looking between the two of you with a mischievous smile on his face. “Why don’t y’all go look in the living room and then tell me if you wanna keep makin’ fun of Dad?”

Sarah excitedly starts off toward the living room, giddy about the surprise awaiting her. Your brow furrows and lips twist up in curiosity, eyes staying glued to Joel. He laughs and nods to the other room, a bright smile on his face.

“Better go see, mi amor. Think you’ll want to meet him.” Joel winks, your attention being pulled away when you both hear Sarah gasp from the living room.

“Oh my gosh! Posey, come here! Aw!”

That’s when it registers — the surprise, home in the middle of the day, the smirk, ‘you’ll want to meet him’.

“You didn’t,” you breathe out, head snapping back to Joel as he gives you a wide, genuine grin.

“Go! See for yourself.” He rounds the island and grabs your hips from behind, guiding your steps into the living room. Sarah’s giggles fill the room as the fluffy Bernese Mountain puppy stands in her lap and licks at her face. The small dog’s attention is pulled from her and over to you and Joel entering the room, a tiny bark sounding before he scampers over.

“Joel, oh my god, how did you—when—oh my god…” You kneel down to scoop up the little one into your arms and cuddle it gently, giving it pets before letting him run around again.

“Found someone who had a litter with their family dogs the day after we talked about it. And arranged to pick him up. They said he’s the energetic one, and that he’s gonna be a big boy. Like a hundred pounds.”

“Oh my god, he’s so sweet…thank you, J.” You beam up at him, waving him to bend down and steal a kiss, squeezing his shoulder.

Sarah’s playing with your new family dog, tugging with a rope toy as he fights back with his whole little body. “Thank you, Dad. He’s so cute!”

“What should we name him?” Joel asks as he lowers himself to the floor next to you, smiling as the puppy runs over. The two rough house, Joel easily flipping him over to scratch at his belly as the dog pants happily.

“Any ideas, Sare?” you ask, looking over at her.

She thinks for a moment before looking up between Joel and you, laughing at the tiny pup’s antics, “What about Goose? He just seems like one. Like a silly goose.”

“Goose? I like it, Bug,” Joel confirms, turning to you with a grin, “How about you, Mari?”

Nodding, you look at the new addition to the family, burning bright with happiness at your people’s excitement, “I think Goose is a perfect fit. And now you’re not outnumbered anymore, J. Two girls and two boys in the Miller household.”

Sarah laughs and lays down to cuddle with Goose while Joel moves closer to your side, wrapping an arm around you and kissing your head as he quietly whispers, “Hopefully won’t be too long before the boys are outnumbered again.”

“And what makes you say it won’t be us girls being outnumbered?”

“Call it father’s intuition. Wouldn’t know what to do with a little boy, bein’ a dad to another girl would just be second nature. Plus, I would want a mini Mari running around the world.” Joel presses a kiss to your temple before you turn your head, catching his pursed lips with yours sweetly.

“I’d take anything if it means havin’ a little piece of you forever, J.”

third time lucky

Negative.

A single line, bold and brash, stares back at you. Turning the plastic in your hands, you attempt to read it at different angles, the smallest bit of hope lingering for another line to appear — that it was a trick of the light that was causing your disappointment.

To no avail, the blue strip remains unaccompanied in the small window. A sinking feeling fills your body from your toes up. Everything feels heavier, except your lower stomach. That has never felt as empty as it is now.

Heavy footsteps thump a vibration in the floors, but your focus remains on a speck of dust floating in the light past your field of vision. His presence hangs in the bedroom, milling about, unknowing of what you were up to before he came in from mowing the lawn.

“Hey, baby, m’gonna take a shower and then we’ve got Sarah’s softball game at three. Probably half to leave here around two, her coach asked all the parents to be thirty minutes early for some reason…” Joel’s voice fades in your head as your thoughts start to yell, scream, fight, taunt inside of your mind.

A hard swallow pops your ears, the ringing in them growing louder as your mind begins to wander. The test is left discarded on the bathroom counter, with no heart yet to throw it in the garbage where the others have ended up. Your bare feet shuffle against the rug as you seek out solace under covers, even in the ninety-plus-degree heat. The springs of the mattress shift under your weight, lying on your side facing the opposite side of the bed that lays empty right now. The coverlet is pulled up over you, curling your fingers at the hem tightly, white knuckle grip to release some of the tension that has taken over your mind. You want to scream, cry, yell, question — but what you want most of all is to be able.

Why aren’t you able? Why can’t you do what your body is made to do, what it begs for, what it reminds you that you’ve failed at every month?

Joel stands in observation of you, careful distance, one hand lifting before he drops it. He can guess what this is about. What you’ve left behind in the en-suite. But to confirm his suspicions, he quietly walks into the tiled room, leaving his clean clothes on the counter while he picks up the test.

Negative.

His body sinks, toes up to his head, but with a gaping, empty feeling in his chest. There’s so much room left in his heart, room he is eager to fill with another part of you, another love, another soul to protect. Now, though, all of his emptiness is filled with an ache for you. You’ve been dreaming out loud for a year now, wonderings and visions shared with him late nights and early mornings — Will they have his eyes? You hope so, so that they look like their sister. Who’s ears would they have? What quirks will they pick up from both of you? Who will they grow up to be? How will we be able to contain our love for both of our kids?

Our kids. Joel remembers that night; after you said that, he couldn’t hold himself back, couldn’t contain his love for you. No hesitation that his own was yours now, too. All he wanted was to give you another, to see your belly grow and your smile brighten and your skin glow. He was begging for whatever power was in the universe for that time to take, for both of you to be gifted with what you wished for so often, so deeply.

Desperation. Wavering confidence. Sorrow, worry, dwindling hope. He saw it all over you, time after time when the single line appeared on the plastic sticks.

You and Joel had been trying for a year. A long year. Maybe your desire was too strong, too overpowering. But shouldn’t that be a sign of your love? For each other, for your family? All he wants to do is give you the life you’ve wished for. And yes, all you’ve said you want is a life with him, but anyone who meets you would be able to tell you are meant for a nurturing life. Meant for motherhood.

It was already natural for you, taking a ten-year-old in stride, making her into your best friend — making her a priority over Joel most of the time. He knew it didn’t matter to you that she wasn’t yours, biologically speaking, but he can’t help but want to give you a child that is part you. How badly he wants another piece of you in the world, all of your goodness packaged into the purest soul.

Resigning with a sigh, he sets the test down on the cool countertop and exits the bathroom, a slow stride over to your lying form. Crumpled under covers. With a soft groan, he lowers himself to his knees with cracks popping his joints. His age is starting to show the closer he gets to forty and the more hours he works in the summer weather, another looming factor for him — he’s only known being a young dad. If you two have to wait, what would it be like to be nearly sixty when your kid graduates high school?

Shaking the superficial concerns from his head, his wide palm glides along the quilted fabric draped over your side. He rests his chin on his opposite arm, laying against the mattress close to your pillow. At the coax of his touch, you turn over to face him. Lips pursed in a frown, dried watery streaks being washed anew with your fresh tears, fat and rolling down your cheeks and over the bridge of your nose. They drip off of your skin, dotting and darkening the fabric of the pillowcase underneath you.

Joel leans in, brushing your hair from your face and pressing his lips to your forehead for a lingering kiss. A deep breath draws the smell of your shampoo into his nose, down deep into his lungs where it soothes his aching chest.

“Mari, sweet girl, I know it’s hard. I know we want it so bad, but there’s always another option,” he speaks softly, kindly, delicately, “We can go to that fertility specialist your doctor recommended. I promise, mi amor, we’ll have a baby together.”

He means it, and you can tell he means it. Ever since you had been back together, ever since he confessed his feelings for you — years ago now — he hasn’t made an empty promise. From tiny little things like a pledge to stop on the way home for your favorite ice cream, going to three different stores and adding nearly an hour to his day simply to show up with it for you, to larger, grander oaths, his wedding vows, the promise of building a beautiful life with you.

Emotion is thick in your throat as you attempt to vocalize your concerns. They keep you up at night, with Joel’s warm and expansive hand resting on your stomach right above your womb as he sleeps soundly. He wants it clearly as much as you do; you can feel it each time you’ve tried. How badly he wants to provide this for you.

Is he having the same thoughts as you? Does he wonder if something’s ‘wrong’ with you?

“I wanna be able to do it. Why can’t I do it on my own?” The sound of your meek voice shatters his heart and he shakes his head back and forth, adamant in shutting down the thoughts.

Tugging the covers down, Joel’s hands find your exposed skin, sliding across with a clammy touch from his labor outside. And nerves, too, you’d guess. Moving from his knees on the floor next to the bed, he finds a spot sitting at your side and shifts you to lay on your back. Opening up to him. Warmth rests over your womb, blanket pulled down to the tops of your thighs while his thumb brushes at your stomach, catching on the fabric of your shirt.

“No—oh, mi Mariposa, you don’t even know if it would be you with an issue. Very well could be me. Maybe breathin’ all the paint fumes at work killed m’little swimmers.” He breathes a small laugh through his nose, attempting to lighten the mood.

Your hands fly up to your face, muffling your voice, “Oh, god, don’t say that. I wanna have your baby, not some sperm donors.”

His hand coasts up your torso, over to your side to wrap around your rib cage, feeling your breaths as his fingertips lightly tickle the spot, “That was supposed to make you laugh, sweet girl.” 

Hands falling away from your face, your brow pinches together and your frown deepens. About to make a retort, your mouth open, Joel skates the fingertips of both his hands up and down your sides, alternated on each side of you to make it harder to catch his wrists. Laughter bubbles up from your chest, your frown morphing into a flashing smile before you’re calling for a surrender in between gasping breaths.

Relenting, his hands stop, settling at the curve of your waist. He leans over you, nudging his nose against yours before pressing a ghosting kiss to your lips. A small grin, hopeful and reassuring, with a tinge of worry flickering in his irises, barely there before his smile reaches his eyes, “It’ll happen for us, Mari baby. Why don’t we say, one last go before lookin’ into the doctors? We’ll do all the things, track whatever we need to track. I’ll drop whatever I need to come home and put a baby in you.”

Joel wiggles his eyebrows, playful smirk crossing his expression. You roll your eyes under him, pushing an accusing finger into his chest, “Like you don’t already do that. I could call you in the middle of work and just go ‘Hey, J’ and you’re in the truck on your way home.”

“That’s right, Mari. As it should be. Y’know what they say — happy wife, happy life.” Another kiss to your lips, this one a bit more savoring. “What d’ya say, mi amor? One more go?”

“Okay, yeah. One more go.”

Butterflies kick up in your stomach when you hear the low rumble of Joel’s truck cut, heavy door swinging closed and quick strides following. The front door opens after a short jingle of keys, shutting behind him with the slide of the lock back into place. Distant grumbles of his make you laugh, his frustrations with his work boots floating upstairs to where you’re sitting on the edge of your bed, leaning back on your hands. Clad in only your bra and panties, you work your bottom lip between your teeth as anticipation builds with each of Joel’s footsteps up the carpeted stairs.

You both only have the afternoon — less than an hour of your afternoon, actually — to make your last attempt. Already having taken advantage of the window in your cycle twice, the peak day of your ovulation fell, of course, during the busiest time of year for Miller Construction. Summer has come to a close, and now people have picked up their home improvements to start nesting for the winter; a craving you’ve been having yourself, desperate to make your home larger and livelier by one more. Joel has snuck away for a moment that you two have alone, and you’ve told the couple you nanny for that you have an immovable appointment for today.

Pretty sure the only thing that will be immovable today will be you once Joel’s hour is up.

 “Mari? Mi amor?” he calls out and you chuckle softly at the boyish excitement in his voice.

“In the bedroom, J!”

Joel rounds the doorway into your shared room, stopping a handful of steps past the threshold when he registers the sight of you. He hums a low moan, licking his lips as his eyes devour your lacy undergarments, “Mierda, mi esposa, estás tratando de matarme? (Shit, my wife, are you trying to kill me?) You look so fucking beautiful, darlin’.”

A low whistle leaves his lips as he stalks closer, eyes rake over your form as you present your primped self for his taking.

“You get all pretty for me, sweet girl? I like this…” he rasps as he’s within arm’s reach now, stretching a hand out to toy with the strap of your bra and snapping it against your skin sharply.

“Wanted to look pretty when you fill me up, J.” One curl of his finger under your chin draws you to sit up straight, tilting your head back to look at Joel towering over you.

“Good girl,” he praises, a glint of excitement in his eyes, “You want me to fill up your sweet little cunt, Mariposa? Want me to give you a baby? Tell me.”

“Yes,” you breathe out shakily, eyelids fluttering closed as his hands trail lightly across your exposed skin, ghosting everywhere you need him most.

“More, sweetheart. Dime. Dime cuánto lo deseas. Suplicar por ello. (Tell me. Tell me how badly you want it. Beg for it.)” His instructions float through your head, only keywords translating in while Joel leaves over you, lips pressing feather-light kisses along your neck, across your chest.

“I need it, Joel. Need you so fucking bad, I wanna have your baby. Want you to make me a mom, fill me up as many times as it takes until we get our baby…please, J…” As if the taste of you wasn’t enough to do him in, the wild, fervent look in your eyes intrigues him beyond. Hearing the words from your lips, directed to him, he’s fucking aching. He was growing hard on his way over here, the thoughts swimming through his mind of you laid out and ready for him to take delegating his blood supply to rush down below his belt.

He needs you, but first, he needs to see you unraveling underneath him only from his fingers.

“Don’t worry your pretty little mind, Mari. M’gonna take care of you. I’ll make sure this one takes. Let’s call it third time lucky this summer.” 

He shoots you a wink, your mouth parting to respond. Before you can let any breath escape, his lips are crashing with yours. Heavy, heady, and so fucking hot it spirals your thoughts into nothing. His tongue melts with yours, the taste of his black coffee and the donut he must have eaten at work this morning tingling your taste buds. Sweat sticks to his skin when your hands rest at the sides of his neck, falling backwards as he climbs over you. He smells of wood shavings, freshly mowed grass, and hard work — calloused hands gliding along your body and feeling the softest of scratches of his blue collar hands.

“Joel, need you — please.” It’s more of a whine than a begging whimper, rising frustration levels from his lack of touch in the place you need and want him the most. 

Your cunt is desperate, dripping down your folds and surely soaking the sheets. A quick jerk of your hips attempts to brush against him, to catch any relief for the need building low in your stomach. A large palm presses your lower half back against the mattress, the other hand pushing your leg to the side to open you up further for him. A knuckle brushes your clit, grazing up and down your seam through your soaked panties. Your husband clicks his tongue as he shakes his head at you, patronizing tone slick in his voice.

“Darlin’, I wanna take every second of my time with you. Are you gonna let me? Gonna let me get your cunt squeezing my fingers? Gonna let me fill you up, mi amor?” he asks, as if you wouldn’t say yes to all of those requests and he knows it. Nodding, a desperate yes exhaled when he applies more pressure with his finger against your clit, rubbing slow circles. “Good girl. Siempre tan bueno para mí. (Always so good for me.)”

Joel folds over your, taking one of your perked nipples into his mouth through your bra and sucking. His tongue flattens against the cup before he’s pulling at the nub with his teeth. The material is darkened where his mouth was when he grows a bit more needy, grabbing at the straps and yanking the bra to rest at your midsection. You slip your arms out of the straps and he pushes you further onto the bed by the back of your thighs, stripping your panties off and settling on his knees.

Pressure forms against your clit from two of his fingers, slow circles dragging a moan from your throat. Joel smirks, satisfied with the way you squirm under him, trying and failing to get more from his hands. Before you can vocalize a whine, Joel is over you again, bringing his attention to your now bare breast while the circles continue. Hot, humid kisses are littered on the soft skin, happy hums rolling from Joel’s chest. He pulls his head up, looking down at your chest with a half grin and his dimple on display.

“You’re gonna get so soft and swollen everywhere, Mariposa. Round belly, huge tits—can’t wait to play with ‘em.” His grin widens, boyish and brazen with the glee that the fact fills him with. “You gonna let me, baby? Gonna let me make your sore tits feel better with my mouth?”

His question goes unanswered as his mouth attaches to one of your nipples, sucking and flattening his tongue as he nurses it. Pulling away with a pop, he mimics the same on the other side, the intensity of his suckling along with his fingers rubbing faster against your clit — even slipping down to tease at your entrance — has you wiggling under him, desperation notching up your spine.

“Joel, please,” you plead, choking on your breath when he pulls the bud of your breast between his teeth, a low growling sound rumbling from his throat. 

Two of his thick fingers push into your dripping cunt, a relieved moan echoing against the walls of the bedroom. Curling up into your spongy walls, they thrust quickly and pet at the certain spot inside of you. Joel’s mouth is still at your chest, his hunger feeding itself on the taste of your skin.

“Fuck, Mari, gonna break my fucking fingers off. So fucking tight.”

A distraught whimper crawls from your chest, breaths heaving as your walls clench around his quick-paced fingers. You gasp when he slips a third one in, hooking them up. Despite the stretch, you still feel an emptiness. All you want is his cock inside of you, spilling into you and leaving you to grow fuller with his baby. The thoughts of him above you, fucking it all deeper into you to reach your womb, drive you over the edge. The tips of his fingers press against that spot inside of you, his warm mouth hanging open at your tit while his eyes watch you come undone. Writhing and walls pulsing around his fingers, his name falls from your mouth as you choke out moans and your vision grows dark.

“That’s it, Mari baby, fuck,” Joel works you through the orgasm before his fingers leave you and he sits back on his haunches. Sucking his digits clean of your slick and come, the other hand rubs your thigh gently before he coos down at you, “That was a big one, wasn’t it? Feel good?”

Still coming down from it all, your body feels liquidity, taking whatever form Joel is molding you into right now after he’s stripped himself bare. One hand slips under you, unclasping your bra and tugging it away from your torso, leaving you as naked as him. His eyes drink in your body while his grip holds your calves, chuckling darkly when you finally breathe out a response, “I feel…like I need you to put a baby in me.”

“Cualquier cosa para usted, mi esposa. Vas a estar tan lleno de mí. Te encanta la sensación de mi mecos dentro de ti, ¿verdad? (Anything for you, my wife. You're going to be so full of me. You love the feeling of my cum inside of you, don't you?)” Your head rolls with a nod, agreeing to anything Joel says in the moment, still hazy from how hard he’d made you come moments ago. Half-lidded eyes watch as he licks his fingers, stroking his cock a few times with a quiet sigh. That’s something you could watch all day — Joel’s pleasure. And here underneath him, you have the perfect view, and the perfect position to be used for it.

Fully handing over control to him, his hands tug you up so your ass sits on his thighs while he’s on his knees. Fingertips skate along the distance of your legs, grabbing at your calves to rest them on his broad shoulders. Even the slightest shift forward from his hips stretches you wide, a delicious ache creating a craving for more.

“Tell me how bad you want it, Mari, tell me how much you wanna have my baby.”

Joel’s gripping his length, rubbing his tip through your wet folds. The notches against your clit quiver the already stretched muscles in your thighs, whines replacing words coming out of your mouth.

“Tell me, or I won’t give you what you want, mi amor.”

“I want it so bad, J. I wanna feel you fuck me so full of you, and I don’t want that feeling to leave. I feel like there’s an emptiness and only you can fill it, I want your baby. Wanna have everyone know how good I am for you, carrying your baby like you want me to. I wanna have a part of you forever,” you gasp out the last word, Joel’s cock inching into you. Muscle memory takes over, your whole body relaxing with the knowledge that he’ll take care of you — he’ll always take care of you.

Joel bottoms out easily, filling you to the hilt before he pauses to take a breath. His eyes meet yours and he smiles, sweet and sincere, while holding your shins, “I fucking love you, mi Mariposa. Wanna give you a baby…”

“Pleasepleaseplease—” You don’t know if you’re begging more for him to give you what you want or to move his hips, but in the end, you get both. 

Joel starts out slow, shallow thrusts keeping him inside of you. Grunts from the controlled movements fill the room, your small whimpers following each noise he makes. The sound of him fucking into your cunt captures his attention, gaze zeroed in on where you two meet. Watching the stretch of your tight pussy around his cock, he feels the burning desire for more. To watch you take it deeper, harder.

The next snap of his hips is just that - smacking his skin against your ass before he adjusts, laying you back completely on the mattress and leaning over you. Your legs are still hooked over his shoulders, the burning of your muscles now straining your hamstrings and glutes. His entire body folds you, his head hovering over yours as he fucks into you further. The tip of his cock kisses your womb, the force of his thrusts driving your hips open more for him.

“Gonna — fuck — gonna make you a momma, Mariposa. That what you want? Get fucked so well, be so full of me that we make a baby? Everybody’s gonna know I treat my wife right. With your round belly…swollen—ah—swollen tits. Gonna be so beautiful, and so fucking sensitive everywhere.”

His words only add onto the feeling of his thick cock filling you up, nearly verging on too far and too much. Moans exhale on your lips, his name repeated like a chant with each harsh snap of him into you. Your hands scramble for purchase as his sheer power drives you up the mattress, sheets scratching against your bare back. One set of fingers dig into the meaty flesh of his shoulder, nails pressing crescent shapes like an iron-hot branding.

Above you, Joel studies how your mouth has fallen open, thoughts completely left your mind with how cockdrunk you are. He gingerly grips your chin, holding it to face him and commanding your eyes to his as he pants heavily.

“What d’you wanna make me, baby?” It’s only met with the sounds of his cock dragging in and out of you, the slap of skin as you gasp under him. “C’mon, Mari baby, use your words.”

“A daddy,” you breathe out, your opposite hand combing into his messy curls and gripping tight.

“Say it again. Dime.” Not thinking it was possible, Joel pushes you further, hitting into you harder with each thrust nudging his tip toward your cervix. You might only leave this afternoon with soreness, but you continued to hold out hope for a baby to be the well-worth prize for how you’re going to feel tomorrow.

“A daddy!”

“Dime. Dime. Dime,” he commands and you listen, writhing under him as he hacks away at your shared resolve, throwing you closer and closer to the edge.

“Daddy — oh, fuck, a daddy. Wanna make you a daddy!” You’re yelling at this point, sobs of pleasure wracking your body and you thank god for a split second that the two of you are home alone in the middle of the work day. Surely the whole block might be hearing all of your wanton sounds.

“God, I could get used to you calling me that, Mari baby,” Joel groans and throws his head back, bearing his teeth as he punches his hips into your clenching pussy, the telltale sign that you’re close.

“C’mon, mi amor, give it to me. Come for me and I’ll let your fucking pussy milk me for every last drop. That’s what you want, right? Gotta fill you up and make a baby for my Mari baby.” He’s rambling as you reach your peak, toes curling and coming even harder than your first one this afternoon. 

A near scream pulls itself from as deep as your gut, the sound as if you were in more pain than the absolute pleasure you feel. Your grip on his hair tightens, drawing him down for a messy kiss as you mumble against his lips.

“Please gimme a baby, J. Need it all inside of me, please. Come for me, mi esposo.” 

The name sends goosebumps across his shoulders and trickles down his spine before he’s barking your name once and spilling into you, painting your walls with each rope. He takes a moment to breathe before he gently presses his hips in a few short thrusts, fucking his spend as far into you as possible.

Joel collapses against your torso, no other efforts exerted to move away. Delicate, nimble touches brush the hair from his sweaty forehead, rubbing his shoulders as he hums contently.

“Fuck, baby, might just have to stay inside. Keep you plugged up so I can stay here all day with you.” Quiet, breathless laughter leaves your lips as you shake your head, tracing along his jaw before he turns his head to press his lips into your tummy.

“Can’t wait for you to be a momma. Gonna be the best one ever, y’already are. Love you so much.”

The two of you lay like that for what feels like hours, only to be reminded of Joel’s limited schedule when his cell starts ringing from downstairs. Getting up with a groan, he slips out of you and lifts your hips, stuffing a pillow or two underneath them to keep your lower half elevated. You roll your eyes at the superstitious gesture, gasping when his fingers push into you once more to put his leaking come back into where it belongs.

“Gotta make sure it takes, pretty girl. Wanna see you get all round with my baby in you. Everybody’ll know how good I am to you, huh? Pumping you full of me so much we made a new fucking life…better stay like this until I get home again, Mari baby. Wanna make sure those lil swimmers get all the help they can get.”

“Mm…” you hum, hands grabbing for him to lean over you again. Sneaking a kiss, you pull away to whisper to him with a grin on your lips, “Better get back to work…daddy.”

He snorts out a laugh, beaming a bright smile as mischief glimmers in his eyes, “Mal. Mala chica. (Bad. Bad girl.)”

Three days late. You’ve been tracking your cycle like a mad woman, ticking off days in the notebook next to your bed, and now you’re officially three days late. Joel and you had agreed to wait a few days after you expected your period, hopeful that the extra time meant a more accurate, and desired, result.

The kitchen timer sitting on Joel’s side of the bed ticks away while you side on the edge of the bed. Tapping your fingers against your thighs, bare skin against your fingertips from the high hem of your denim shorts. Joel paces the room, eyes focused a thousand yards ahead. Anxiety and anticipation had been plaguing both of you all day, work slugging by minute by minute, second by second. Joel had left the jobsite as soon as was acceptable, leaving Tommy to wrap up, and swung by the pharmacy to pick up a new box of tests. Your task for the day was to chug water, or any liquid, all afternoon — by the time Joel was one foot through the door, you were ready to burst. Snatching the bag of tests out of his hand, you ran to the bathroom to pee in a plastic disposable cup and stick at least three tests in.

Now, you two are waiting for more seconds and minutes to tick by, added to the tally of the entire day. As you’re about to stand and stop Joel from burning treads in the area rug from walking his tight circles, a trill of a bell vibrating demands your attention. Turning off the noise in a flash, you stand and cross the room to where your husband is now frozen in place. A gentle touch to his cheek, his eyelids flutter close and he takes a long exhale before opening them again.

“Ready?” you ask, uncertainty pitching your voice up.

A minute nod, one shake of his chin, Joel’s hand finds the small of your back as he responds, “Ready, mi amor.”

His hand guides you into the bathroom, and a handful of steps from the three tests laid out on the counter, you turn around, panic twisting your expression. Joel stumbles to stop his collision with you, large palms grabbing onto your biceps to catch himself.

“M’scared, J…” Your voice is meek, cracking with emotion. This is the last shot you gave yourselves, whatever is laid on the counter either means unbridled joy or a long road of poking and prodding in countless doctors’ offices.

The warmth of his hands rubbing your arms and the press of his lips to your forehead coax you to relax, to take deep breaths, “I know, Mari baby, I would be lyin’ if I said I wasn’t scared too. But no matter what is on those tests, we’re in it together, right sweet girl?”

His index finger hooks under your chin to draw your attention up to his face, a small smile filled with love and reassurance stretching his lips.

“Always in it together, J.” You take another deep breath, turning around and nodding shortly, “Okay, now m’ready.”

“That’s my girl,” he mumbles before he’s following right behind you again, the two of you pressing yourselves to each other against the counter. Joel has an iron grip on your hips, nerves manifesting in the squeezes of his hands. Shaking fingers turn over each test before picking them all up to your lines of vision.

Two lines. Two bold lines screaming at both of you, across all three tests.

Positive.

Positive. You’re pregnant. You and Joel are having a baby.

“Holy shit…” Joel exhales behind you, smile creeping into his voice. Somehow, his grip gets even tighter as he turns you around, “Holy shit! You’re pregnant, Mari. We’re havin’ a baby! You’re gonna be a momma!”

Giddiness overcomes both of you, happy and disbelieving laughter while you hold each other in a tight embrace. Joel litters kisses around your face, catching your lips last — all teeth and tight lipped from your matching grins.

“You’re gonna be a dad again, how’s that feel?”

“Like I won the damn lottery, mi amor.”

Another kiss, supple and heavy. Joel pulls away first and shakes his head, pressing his forehead to yours, “I love you so fucking much, Mari.”

“I love you too, J.”

“You ready to go, Sare?” you ask, standing next to her seat at the kitchen table where she’s working away at her homework, reaching a hand out to play with her curls. She smiles and nods, writing down one last answer to a question on her worksheet before she lays her pencil down and stands up, rushing over toward the door.

“Just gotta get my shoes on!” she calls out, and you smile, shaking your head.

“Take your time, sweet pea! God knows it’s gonna take me longer to walk over to the door.” Your joke falls on deaf ears of your husband, who stands at the kitchen island and rolls his eyes before he’s crossing the room over to you. Within arm’s length, his hands cup the bottom of your large belly, leaning in for a sweet peck.

“Nobody cares if you move slow. Better to be careful than—”

“Careless, yes, I know. I think those might be our baby’s first words since they hear them so much from their dad,” you tease and he shrugs, kissing you again while his touch wanders across the flannel of his that you’re sporting, too tired to buy more maternity clothes that you’ll grow out of and opting for his closet every morning.

“Jus’ looking out for my girls. All three of ‘em.” He beams proudly, brown eyes shining brightly before he turns you in his arms, accompanying you to the front door where your near-teenager is waiting. Ever the sweetheart she is, she’s got your purse slung on her shoulder, car keys in hand to pass off to you. You thank her quietly, turning back to Joel as he looks between the two of you.

“Alright, have fun with your girls’ day. And call if you need anything — either of you. I’ll be waitin’ here for ya.” Joel smooths down Sarah’s hair before kissing the crown of her head; she squirms away, the teenage attitude rearing its head in some early moments, especially with her dad. There’s less patience for him, which you completely understand as a teenage girl once yourself. He huffs out a sigh as she slips out the door, heading down the front path toward your car.

“Hey, s’nothing. Teenage girl things. She loves you, and you’re the best dad.” A hand on his cheek coaxes him down to your lips, a supple kiss exchanged before he pulls away and bends to kiss the top of your belly.

“Bye, my little June Bug.” He stands upright again and steals another kiss, mumbling, “And bye, mi Mariposa. Drive safe, let me know if you need anything while you’re out. I love you.”

“We love you too. And m’speaking for the moody one, too.” Joel chuckles and rubs your bump once more before sending you on your way, watching and waving from the door as y’all drive away.

The plan for today had come about when you started to notice Sarah growing quieter, retreating to her room more often after family dinners and denying the chance at movie night some days. Joel had noticed too, but was a bit nervous to broach it with her, not wanting to make her feel bad about being more independent.

Your relationship with her though was much different to Joel’s. There was the foundation of your caretaking role with her, much more of a friend with authority when it was only you two before you were anything close to a parental figure. More open and, well, you could relate more to what she was going through. She confided in you first about girls at school being catty, about her growing crushes on boys in her grade. And this year, only a month after your due date, she will officially become a teenager. It was a strange time in any girl’s life, full of growing pains.

And on top of all of that, add on a new baby arriving. Attentions drawn elsewhere, priorities shifted to preparing for the baby. Sarah never fell to the backburner in your minds, but you didn’t know how she was feeling. Guessing by her quiet actions, you could tell she was feeling left out but didn’t want to stir up trouble.

Always the sweet girl. And you knew how that was.

So, you’d asked her for a girls’ day, excluding her dad from the fun and giving both of you some time with each other to feel like it was years before. It was all about Sarah today, no mentions of baby — no buying diapers or supplies or clothes. A promise made to yourself to make Sarah feel special, because that is exactly what she was. The baby on the way may be your first biological child, but nothing can compare to the unique bond that you have with your Sare Bear.

The day was spent waddling throughout the mall, helping her pick out new outfits and shoes for the end of the school year. Collecting a haul, you two stopped off for lunch and a trip to the nail salon before you finally made your way back home in the evening. Sarah was smiling brightly in the passenger seat, joking around with you and eagerly telling you all about the latest school drama. Your heart was about to burst with how much she’d come out of her shell again all day, even wanting to show off her new things to her dad when you both got back.

In the living room, Joel greets you two from the couch, eyes widening and a low whistle leaving his lips when he sees the damage done, “Quite some shoppin’ there, Bug. Y’all buy out the whole store?”

You wave him off and encourage Sarah to show off her haul, walking over to settle onto the sofa next to Joel. The younger Miller excitedly starts pulling out pieces and showcasing them, excitedly telling her dad exactly where she plans to wear them. His hand rests on your leg, attention completely focused on his daughter in front of him, squeezing you gently when she gets particularly worked up over something. You can tell he feels what you were in the car, heart bursting that she seems like herself again after a day spent with you.

“That’s nice, Sare Bear. I like the color,” Joel comments on the last shirt Sarah holds up, her smile still beaming as she tosses it back into the bag.

“Thanks, Mom actually picked it out! I thought it would be fun to have for camp this year, since I’m gonna start the counselor training program…” Her voice trails off as Joel listens intently. You, on the other hand, take deep breaths to hold it together, the simple moniker rolling off of Sarah’s tongue so naturally. Your heartbeat thumps in your chest, and baby Miller kicks her feet against your tummy — equally as excited.

You manage to keep it calm while Sarah recaps the rest of the day before she gathers up her shopping bags to take to her room. As she’s leaving the room, she’s quick to run over and give you a hug, leaning down to meet you where you sit on the couch. Your belly sticks out between the two of you, but regardless you pull her into a tight squeeze as she says thank you. Her curls bounce as she scampers off upstairs, the quiet sounds of her feet in the hallway queuing your watery eyes to overflow and for your nose to sniffle. Joel is grinning brightly next to you, pulling you into his lap and holding you against him as he wipes the few happy tears away.

“She called me Mom…” you whisper to your husband, afraid to admit it any louder as if it would disappear.

Joel presses his forehead against yours, a sweet kiss against your lips before he whispers back, “You have no idea how happy it makes me to know she feels that way about you.”

“I just…I feel so lucky. And maybe it’s hormones, but oh my god, I can’t stop blubbering. I’m a mom.”

“You’re the best mom. Have been to Sarah since she met you, and you’re going to be the best mom to our little one on the way.”

June 21st, 2009.

The first day of summer.

It’s the first day of summer and you’re stuck inside. Not at home, no, you’re currently propped up in a hospital bed with your legs in stir-ups, breathing in between contractions. Exhaustion weighs on your body, a full hour passing of you pushing in time with the pain in your abdomen that radiates all over. Sweat sticks your hair to your forehead and Joel sitting next to you brushes it out of the way. His other hand is limp in yours, ready to be squeezed with a vice grip whenever you need to push. Joel leans over you in level with your head, lathering on encouragements.

“You got this, Mari.”

“So strong, baby. You can do it.”

“Thank you, mi amor, thank you thank you thank you.”

The last one comes after a string of complaints against him doing this to you — despite you both knowing you begged for it nine months prior — and for having such a big head in his own baby photos that he had to have passed down to the baby.

Another wave kicks in, your doctor and nurses coaching you to give another final push. Putting every last bit of your energy behind the flex of your muscles, groaning out with pain and frustration before a piercing cry fills the room. Heavy, tiny sobs ring in your ears.

“You did it, baby, m’so proud of you. Our little girl,” Joel says in awe, glancing between you and where the doctor holds your little baby girl, summoning Dad over to cut the cord. 

She’s taken away to be cleaned up and Joel returns to your side, ready to help you attentively through the afterbirth. You wave him off, begging him to go keep an eye on your little girl. Once she’s clean enough, the nurses lay her on your bare chest, the sight of her tiny fingers and toes bringing about your own cries. Your hands hold her there, delicate touches brushing against her soft skin and her damp but full head of dark brown hair.

The rest of the process is painful but smoother, shorter. Before you know it, all tests are done and Joel is next to the bed again, wiping a damp cloth across your forehead.

A rush of adrenaline, pure unfiltered need and excitement to meet your daughter keeps you awake, sitting up carefully as you accept her into your arms from your husband who’s wearing the biggest smile. He sits on the edge of the bed, hand on your leg as you study the features on her small face.

“She’s perfect, isn’t she, Mari? Looks like her momma.”

You beam, shaking your head as you place a fingertip against her nose, “See, I think she looks like her daddy. Already got the grumpy brow.”

Both of you laugh, your unbridled attention on the tiny bundle in your arms as you gush over her for minutes longer. Joel rubs your leg, drawing your eyes up to him as he asks, “So you think we picked a good name?”

“I think we picked a perfect name. Our ‘S’ girls,” you grin at him before looking down at your little girl, “Skye Isla Miller. I think it suits her perfectly.”

A bit more time is spent between only the two of you and Skye before you’re itching to see your eldest, and for her to meet her little sister. Joel retreats to where Sarah’s in the waiting area with Tommy and Maria, who’s now three months pregnant herself, waving her to come back with him. She nervously enters the room, quiet as a mouse until you reassure her with a smile and welcome her to sit in the bed next to you.

Joel makes the introductions, voice thick with emotion as he stands over his three girls, watching as his first little one meets his second, “Sarah Elena, this is your baby sister, Skye Isla.”

Sarah quietly asks permission to hold her; you lay Skye in her arms carefully, teaching her how to support her head and where to avoid her soft spot. Sarah picks up on it like a natural, adjusting her little sister when she fusses a bit, finally settling into a new set of familiar hands.

“Dad said you did a really good job, Mom. With everything today. S’pretty cool that you brought a whole person into the world…” Sarah glances over at you with a shy smile before addressing both you and Joel, “M’really happy she’s here.”

“You’re gonna be a great big sister, Bug,” Joel beams with pride as he squeezes her shoulder, leaning over to press a kiss to the crown of your head. He hums as he looks over you three, “Got my Mariposa, my Bug, and my little June Bug. Mi maripositas. Don’t think anything could beat seeing my three girls altogether finally.”

You find yourself observing your family from afar, listening with muffled ears as Joel and Sarah chat about who Skye got what features from. Cheeks aching from smiling, you can’t help but think that this summer was off to the most wonderful start, and that every summer after was only going to get better. 

taglist: @beskarandblasters @undrthelights @swiftispunk @joelsversion @asirenbyanyothername @ellenmunn @ja-ehyun @sw33tp1xie @marisemonteiroo @brunetteeras @bongsrconfusing @addictedtotlou @angie2274 @pedrostories @pedroholic @theelishad @johnwatsn @elissa @felicityofbakerstreet @atinylittlepain @northernbluess @cannolighost @casa-boiardi @wannab-urs @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @fishingforpike @msjarvis @walkintotheriveranddisappear @sugadolly @yazsos @peppesgirl @pastawench @anoverwhelmingdin @wolfbook87 @mswarriorbabe80 @planet-marz1 @kiwisbell @lizzie-cakes

[crystal-lillies]

how was the 13th doctor robbed ?

Well. This is gonna be a long one anon.

For starters, she had a shorter episode count for each of her series (two consisting of 10 episodes, her last only had 6!!! SIX!!! and even with the ending specials that's 3 more, but they did not deal with the third season much at all. That story barely had anything.) Each season since the start of NuWho has been 13 episodes plus Christmas specials, give or take extra specials depending. (10th Doctor had FOUR extra specials after the end of his last season. Plus he showed up in Day of the Doctor, so he's been extra spoiled). Just think of how much more could have been done with more episodes!

She was also robbed of the traditional Christmas specials, which was a staple of EVERY NuWho season before her, and GUESS WHO GOT ONE RIGHT AWAY when RTD came back? (13 got a couple New Years specials which are fine, but she will be the ONLY multi season NuWho Doctor to not have a Christmas special, and that's just wrong. The Christmas specials are iconic and holiday time classics and always focus on familial bonds the Doctor makes and 13 is missing that).

The 13th Doctor's tenure also had to endure COVID, which isn't on the BBC or the showrunners obv, but it still detracts from what she could have had that the past Doctors had and what the future Doctors will have.

The 10th and 11th Doctors particularly had oodles of extra content like shorts and mini features that was nowhere to be found for the 13th Doctor. (In fairness, 12 didn't get as many extra bonus things also, but 12 had full seasons and Christmas specials, including one of the best ones with River Song).

And one of the most egregious forms of theft was from Jodie Whittaker herself. She is an incredible actress and she was hardly given the space to fully go as hard as she could. If you've ever seen the Antigone performance she gives...it's stunning. Legendary. Raw. She is a brilliant actress so she was able to bring some of that into certain moments of the 13th doctor's tenure, but there are painfully few epic moments of 13 in the same way there are so many of the 10th, 11th, and 12th doctors.

Also she was robbed, again with the shorter episode count, of breathing room and development with her companions. Short season runs (10 or less episodes) are So So Lean, and they really hurt so much not just from Doctor Who but the Netflix ATLA, Percy Jackson, Marvel and Star Wars shows, etc. We could have had more development time with Yaz, especially with her feelings toward 13, have them properly shown a lot more, rather than having Mandip and Jodie carrying everything on their backs with little add ins and crumbs. Plus Graham and Ryan! And poor Dan got shafted as the new Flux companion. He got so much less time to really get fleshed out and form a bond with 13. The show even makes a point of that! He's closer to Yaz than anyone.

And 13 was also robbed of one of the most important things of all: passing on her wardrobe to the next doctor.

RTD can say what he likes but he was a coward and an asshole for not having David wear Jodie's costume. He can't in one breath claim to be treading lightly about crossdressing to be respectful (when it's Perfectly Fine to have the POC male villain rock the wardrobe not a half hour before, weird) and in the same breath have Rose Noble's deadname used multiple times in the first TenThree special.

Apologies about the ramble, anon, but more or less, those are many of the reasons why I feel 13 has been robbed in ways her predecessors and her successors were/are not. (I've said these things before and I have said them again, and I'll probably keep saying them.) I genuinely hope this helps you understand some of the lingering feelings of disappointment.

[eagna-eilis]

Star Wars Characters at a Family Wedding in Ireland

ANAKIN - Gets extremely nostalgic about his own wedding and makes his adult twin children groan in embarrassment. Is in such a good mood that he isn't even mad when Leia calls him a fascist for voting Fine Gael, and manages to give his grandson an effective pep talk.

PADMÉ - So resplendent that the bride is almost jealous but honestly how could you be upset with her she's just so nice. Gets giggly tipsy over dinner and waltzes with C3P0 afterwards. Touches up literally everyone's makeup for them throughout the night and does a better job than the actual makeup artist.

OBI-WAN - Waits til the night is winding down then magically locates a squeezebox, fiddle, a guitar, and a tin whistle and hands them out to start a sessiún. The sing-song goes on until 5am and it's all his fault. His signature song is 'The Lass of Aughrim' because it makes him feel all literary.

R2D2 - Has at least four too many double Jamesons and literally starts arguing with the wall. Shmii finds him passed out under a table the next morning, wherein he swears he's not drinking until Christmas.

C3P0 - Wrecks the heads of the hotel staff over dinner with all his requests, to the point of embarrassing the other people at his table. Conducts impromptu ballroom dancing lessons while the band plays and charms the pants off everyone with his patient explanations of how to foxtrot.

LANDO - Pulls out a deck of cards and starts a game of 21s in the corner. Absolutely swindles everyone. It's okay though because he puts his winnings behind the bar so nobody has to pay for their drinks after that.

AHSOKA - Brings enough weed to share with a chosen few, like an absolute queen. Ends up hanging out in the loo for ages rolling for herself, Sabine, Maz, Kanan, and eventually Ben. Despite her relative stillness and quiet, she enjoys the music more than basically anybody else and people will quote her fondly slagging Anakin over dinner for the next 20 years.

SABINE - Camera queen who tries to look like she isn't enjoying herself. Fools nobody because she keeps grinning and snort-laughing. Her photos are a thousand times better than the photographer's and are the ones that the couple use for their album.

HERA - Helps Leia gang up on Anakin about politics because goddamn it, Leia isn't wrong. Hands out isotonic powder sachets and paracetamols to everyone before they go up to bed. They're gonna need it.

EZRA - Gets so hyper after consuming so much 7up that Hera has to send him to bed before the DJ takes over from the band. Sneaks down later for the cocktail sausages.

DIN DJARIN - Couldn't get a babysitter so he's tucked up at home watching The Late Late and hate-tweeting it.

GROGU - fell asleep in front of The Late Late. Delighted when somebody brings wedding cake to the house the following day.

KANAN - Literally will not be at peace until the DJ plays Kenny Rodgers' 'The Gambler' because it's not a wedding without it. Once that's done he insists on 'Come On Eileen'. Somebody's gotta be the keeper of the flame of tradition, after all.

CHEWBACCA - Requests all the group dances. Rock the Boat, The Siege of Ennis, The Macarena, The Walls of Limerick, Chain Reaction. Bullies everyone into joining in, except Ben who is the absolute antithesis of craic.

LUKE - Every wedding requires at least one merrily drunk uncle and Luke does not disappoint. Suit jacket? Gone. Top buttons? Open. Tie? It's now around his head while he stands on a chair playing air guitar to 'Hotel California'. Ends up puking in a flower pot. Iconic.

LEIA - Would have been okay if she stuck to wine all night but a single gin and tonic on top of the shitty hotel merlot and suddenly she's having an hour-and-a-half political argument with Anakin. Embarrasses the hell out of her parents, brother, and son by smooching Han repeatedly while dancing.

HAN - Organises the pre-ceremony pints. His sotto-voce asides are funnier than anything in the speeches. Quietly sings along to 'Brown Eyed Girl' by Van Morrison in Leia's ear while they dance, prompting all that smooching.

FINN - Sneaks into the hotel's public bar to check the hurling scores on the telly then reports them back to all the lads. Keeps his wits about him regards alcohol so he can take care of Poe later but eats so much cake he feels sick.

POE - Holds court in the bar, telling long anecdotes about his life that are only 75% true. Dances and flirts with all the aunties and nanas and makes them feel great about themselves. It doesn't convince Ahsoka to give him a spliff, though, because she is immune to his charms.

ROSE - The boomers yell at her for getting the DJ to play 'Celtic Symphony' by the Wolfe Tones, but she calls them hypocrites who are oozing postcolonial shame. Anakin offers to adopt her because now she's the centre of the politics argument. Knocks it out of the park at the sing-song because she knows all the words to at least 20 rebel songs.

MAZ - The first to place her handbag down on the dancefloor so as to coax the other nanas onto the floor. Jovially flirts with every man over 18 and under 60 that isn't her blood relation. Asks Poe to marry her.

REY - Finishes at least three other people's dinners. Sings along very loudly to every song that the band AND the DJ plays. Can't dance at all but it doesn't stop her. Should probably check on Ben because she knows what he's like but decides that tonight he's his family's responsibility. Loses her entire shit when ABBA plays.

BEN - Zero craic, God help the poor craytur. Drinks brandy as an affectation and starts quoting James Joyce after four of them. Gets extremely mopey after brandy number six and ends up having a long heart to heart with his Grandda Ani. Cries then throws up. Auntie 'Soka gives him a joint to settle his tummy. Subsequently feels better and then knocks everyone's socks off singing 'Raglan Road'.

SHMII - Begs off the party at 10pm because she's 97 years old. Still makes sure that everybody takes their hangover down to breakfast the following morning for a Big Feed of rasher-sausage-and-pudding, and maybe hair of the dog if they're desperate.

[deadpool15]

Chapter 2

Monika POV

After walking out, I step inside the Street Women Fighter set. Looking around the room, I hear everyone cheering me on and just smile. Then I heard our iconic PROUDMON song and started to do our famous dance. Everyone starts to cheer even louder. Eventually, I go and sit down in the judges' chair, and the other judges are revealed. After Mike and Shownu step on, we start to move on to the actual competition. I start to slowly gaze around the room to see the difference in the crews, only to be stuck on one specific pair of gorgeous eyes.

It almost feels like time stops for a second, as chic as that sounds. I start to analyze everything about her eyes. The light green mixture of Christmas ornaments. I then look further down and stare at every aspect of her. She is fucking gorgeous. The most beautiful women I've ever seen. But once I look back at her eyes, I notice she is already staring at me with a dangerous gaze. Her eyes dont have an innocent glow. She is staring at me like she has other intents. Her eyes dont resemble precious ornaments, and no, they are full of wonder. She has more of a furious approach. They remind me of a deadly river.

I eventually break eye contact when Daniel starts speaking about the first part of the competition. I guess we are about to begin with the no-respect battles, so everyone is told to take a break to change their clothes.i can still feel her stare burning into me. And she isn't trying to be shy about it. Almost like she wants me to know, or maybe I'm just overthinking it. I've had to pee for a while, so this is the perfect time to use the bathroom. I make my way to the bathroom it took me a moment with these stupid oversized heels. I lot of complaints have been happening about bruising so they are starting to make our shoes fucking huge it seems. I step into the bathroom, cursing at this skirt that won't come off.

I stop for a moment when I hear someone coming inside the restroom as well. Then, I continue to pull this skin-tight ass skirt off my body. I finally pull it off and use the bathroom. After I'm done, I go through hell and back to get the skirt back on. It looks easy, but it's a difficult task. I walk out the bathroom and go to wash my hands and start humming to myself. I almost forgot there was another person in here until. Someone grabbed my shoulder. "Holy, shit," I said as I turned around only to see the familiar black women. I couldn't keep my eyes off off. She smiles at me, I notice her dimples and smiley piercing.

I realize I'm staring when she starts laughing. "Earth to Monika. I've been trying to get your attention for a couple of minutes. I'm pretty sure my face can't be that interesting. " She familiar stranger says while looks at me with her big beautiful eyes. "Oo, I'm sorry it's just you kinda scared me, so it took a moment," i say while laughing along with her. Then I take notice of her language, she is speaking korean. "You're from Jam Republic, right? I didn't know any of you could speak Korean. " I said while waiting for her response, her voice is amazing, by the way. She seems so lively but intriguing. "Yea, I was kinda raised her to be honest, oo, and I'm Ashley, by the way. I don't know. I'd judges have to look at everyone single profile, but I don't expect you to remember names. So I'd thought I save you the trouble." She says, seeming very excited to meet me. So, I respond with enthusiasm. "I'm Monika. Nice to meet you, Ashley", before I could speak further, she cut me off.

"I know who you are, i mean, i feel like i have to. You're our judge, so i had to check out your skills before anyone else. I came to say i hi and possibly get to know you. And i know what you're gonna say. This is a competition, and you can't really speak to me. I understand that, but i know how to separate wpkr from my social life. Plus, you're allowed to have friends, right?" She says while looking at me with a look I can't quite describe. Though I don't know her intentions, she could be using this as a way for a vote. "First of all, you called me what now?" She looks back at me and then at the ceiling. "Monika, or is that not your name, Ms. Shin. " She smirks while waiting for a comeback, though while any other time I could do it, my heart felt stuck.

She is flirting with me. I have to watch out for her. "Of course, I know what my name is, sweetheart, but in Korea, I'm pretty sure you know it doesn't work like that, don't you?" She looks at me smiling before her gaze goes further down my body. "Wow, you're a bold one, aren't you? This is a competition, I don't think it would be best for us to get to know each other right now. And by that look in your eye, I can tell you want to do a lot more then sit in talk. I'm way too old for you sweetie". I tell her, trying to keep a straight face. It's hard, though. It looks like she wants to devour me right here right now. But someone has to be the mature one here.

Ashley's POV

I stare at her, biting my lips again. It should be a fucking crime to look this good in a skirt. It's like she isn't aware of how amazing she looks right now. "I do want to talk, among other things. If it makes you feel better, we can start off by talking and working our way into more details later on. " I said while watching her reaction. Ive already come to terms with easy I want, she just doesn't know it yet. "Age means nothing. I mean, what's a 15-year age gap when we both know what we want? " She tries to speak before I cut her off again and move closer. "I'm aware of what I want, and you should know I always get what I want. I'll play your little game, though it seems fun. Be ready, sweetie. Seems i found a much better prize now, haven't I unnie?" She just stressed at me shocked.

"Well, see you back on there. Make sure to really keep your eyes on me, you know. It's always good to watch the real important people and who could be more important than me unnie?" I tell her while looking at her with faux innocence. "I can't wait to have fun with you, unnie. Bye-bye.

(I know this is shorter, but it's like 5 a.m., and I just woke up and remembered I fell asleep while writing this last night. So I'm sorry, guys, but I hope you like it)

I'm sorry for the late update. yall, I did finish it, but my dumbass is just now realizing I saved it to my drafts instead of posting it

[wanderingblindly]

Lestappen hallmark!! I need to know more

I don't have nearly as much of this done as I'd like, but I love what I have so far!!!!!!!!

The high level concept is:

Plot moved by Charles's shady and beloved Grandma (icon)

Total grandma's boy, and equally shady, Charles has to come take care of her after a fall

Blunt and awkward Max, who's beloved by all the grandmas in the neighborhood (poor European man didn't realize he moved to An Old People Neighborhood outside NY), keeps stopping by to """"""help out"""""", too

Classic hallmark shenanigans ensue :)

Entirely unedited snippet below the cut!

She pulls him from his adrenaline-crash reverie with a bright tone – one that he knows far too well. Her mischievous tone, the one she uses when she’s just a little too proud of a plan coming together:

“Oh! Charles, this is Max. Remember how I told you he shovels my driveway?” Hesitant to let her go, still not quite believing that everything’s ok, Charles stands up – hands never leaving her shoulders. Max, the man that called his grandmother stupid, sits quietly in the corner. 

He waves after being mentioned, flashing a closed-lipped smile. 

“I was gonna hang up her Christmas lights, too, if she had some patience.” He flashes his grandmother a look, narrowing his eyes and tilting his head like a disapproving parent. It takes a moment of conscious resolve to stop his hands from tightening on mémè’s shoulders as he watches, bristling at the other man’s tone. 

Because that’s his tone to use with his grandmother, first of all. 

“Charles,” He introduces himself with a default smile, something he’d give an Uber driver that took too many wrong turns: tight but polite, conscious of his rating. “Mémè, she… speaks of you highly.” She flashes him a play nice from the corner of her eye – he squeezes his hands in a silent shut the fuck up.

[jasminebelle096]

The Welcome Home website is back let's gooooooo!

Let's just say I didn't waste any time and immediately got into it. And I came back with some screenshots.

SPOILERS AHEAD GO LOOK AT THE WEBSITE BY YOURSELF BEFORE READING MORE

First of all, when I clicked on the link partycoffin posted, I got welcomed by our dear Home who looks so adorable!

Then our silly Wally with...strange little symbols I must say

But whatever, it's probably nothing, it's just to fit the Christmas theme.

Even though Christmas was like...3 months ago or something.

Then we have this:

Apparently, from what I understand by reading it, the people behind the website got rid of the little bugs that were roaming around. You know, the bugs who leads us to audio files when clicking on it.

That's funny because there's still this one small bug below which we can't still click on it for some reasons.

And why are they acting like it's Christmas although, once again, THREE months ago?

When checking on the neighborhood, there's more of the little symbols.

As well as one in Wally's canvas

(why does this one looks like the lamp from Aladdin?)

Apart from that, it's nice seeing all our neighbors again. I missed them not gonna lie.

I took a look at the stickers and the snowglobes are SO cute! You guys should see them.

Nothing changed about the guestbook, it's still closed

But hey, there's new audios! Some little songs and records. I absolutely ADORE the one with Howdy and his family! That's right, we got to meet Howdy's big family and it was so funny and adorable.

Poor Eddie who have to deal with Julie's recklessness, even though it's part of Sally's play. By the way, Sally is still an icon, I can assure you about that. Like:

Juliette, I fell from the sky, you fell from a house...Come on! Walk it off...

Girl, never change

And Frank who is just tired of this mess lol, as well as Home who is playing the reindeer?? I have no idea how it's possible and at some point I don't want to know.

Also, Julie can hibernate. I mean, yeah, I kind of forgot she's a rainbow monster, so it's not that surprising although still a bit for me.

Anyway, everything was normal I guess, except for the little symbols that were everywhere. So I went to the merchandise section and I came upon this:

Yeah, it's Crispy Sweets but Christmas. And there's a second image with it I'm gonna take a quick look-

Hold on

Hold on a second

Are those...the symbols that are scattered around the website?

Wait are you-

Are you TELLING ME

That those symbols are secret codes???

Upon discovering this, I tried to "de-coding" those symbols using the translator, but it didn't mean anything much. Like, it was just random letters and not words. I tried to use the letters in the website link to see if it could bring me to some secret dark page like the site is known for, but nothing.

I don't know about you, but there HAVE to be something with those codes. I can feel there's something in it but I can't tell what exactly.

Interesting thing, remember the Aladdin lamp? This symbol translate to the letter "W".

"W" for "Wally"...huh...

Well I guess Wally sure likes to mention himself huh, the little silly guy.

But wait, there's more.

I went to the News section and this is what it says:

From prying eyes

MMMMM NOW THAT IS A CHOICE OF WORDS DON'T YOU AGREE

Yeah they literally kicked poor Wally out of the website lol

I mean not gonna lie after the mess he did last time, especially with the stickers...

But then:

I don't know about you, but doesn't it sounds strange?

Like, how can you still assume we're in December while three months have passed? Like, how can you not realize it? How did you not notice that time have passed?

Common mistake or not, it's sure is strange. Are they okay?

Also here's this on the FAQ thing, I don't know if it was already there but I'm putting this just in case:

So yeah...that's all I could find.

Go look by yourself and see if there's more, like if I missed something. Not gonna lie, it's the first time I've felt so INVESTED like this lol

Anyway, good job @partycoffin and thank you for this update, rest well you deserve it

[babiebom]

Ranking Nerdy Prudes Must Die songs

A/N: because I need something to post and I’ve been obsessed since the musical came out. Also merry Christmas and happy holidays!! Also PLEASE DONT HATE ME

Tw:some sexual mentions, cursing, lyrics might be wrong bc I’m going off the top of my head, mentions of murder etc

Wc: idk it’s headcanons so like 3 points for each song

Misc Masterlist

15)The Best of You

I just don’t listen to this as much as I listen to the other songs

Like it’s not bad

I just don’t really listen to it

It sounds like a high school musical song and the child in me loves it

14)If I Loved You

Idk y but the first time I watched this song made me uncomfy

Well not the whole song literally just the “don’t need lover boy need lover man” part even though Mariah KILLS it idk what it is about that part

But also their voices are immaculate

like Actually I love their voices so much

And the song itself is VERY good

Again I just don’t listen to it as often as the others

OH BABE ID LET YOU KNOW

PERIOD

I also really love the chaos that would be watching two people do this in a cafe

Like how they’re standing at the door like “you leave” “no you leave” actually funny.

13)Cool as I Think I Am(Reprise)

SADGE

I DONT LIKE SADGE

But also they again kill this Mariah and Joey are top tier

The whole “you’re not as cool as you think you are” “you’re as smart as I know you are”

To the “IF I LOVED YOU I WOULD SHOW IT”

IMMACULATE

Would be higher up if I listened to it more often but alas like the ones before this I just don’t listen to it enough.

12)Just For Once

Tbh this is only this high up because of the iconic parts that I listen to over and over

Like I think the only time I listened to the whole song was while watching the musical in its entirety

I literally only listen to VERY specific parts of this song

I’m gonna skip around some of the lyrics but y’all know the parts

The “I wasn’t upset about the attention I ensnared JUDGE ME”

“It fucking worked, I’m fucking here, he’s fucking her, I’m disappointed”

“Should I let the coals burn out? JUST FOR OOOOOOONCE” LAUREN LOPEZ IS A GODDESS PLS

“The other day the Johnson’s borrowed my tap shoes. I used to dance”

Like actually makes my heart clench

Like I’m 23 and this song makes me feel like it’s too late to do what I want because there’s all these things I used to do when I was younger and now I’m just….living but not really.

11)The Summoning

THE CHAOS

HELLO FWENDY-WENDS

Out OF THE DEPTHS OF HELL AND BACK

I LOVE THIS SONG

Stephanie yum yum

I love the lords in black (especially because they’re so colorful)

Also the beginning of this song is iconic

Literally their chanting and voices are so good.

Honestly if they remade this musical into a movie with all sorts of cgi I feel like this would be a VERY CHAOTIC PART

I love it

Also I think I just love when it’s a bunch of noise that allows me not to think

Which is what this song is when they’re singing the repetitive parts

And I know people hate the repetitive parts but I love them

Like so good

10)High School is Killing Me

Again don’t listen to this as much as I should

But I should mention that I listen to this at least once a day so we see how much I listen to the songs after this one

IM DEAD!!

I’m scared someone comes for ME I’m unprepared

Jon and Lauren sound so good here and I honestly think this was the perfect way to open a musical

Like yeah it’s a little spoiler but it’s so GOOD

It’s hell on earth you know? I’m tweeting all about it!

The way Angela covers her mouth every time they curse is funny

AND the part where they’re like “is god the one giving the test” and Angela (Grace) is in the middle with the light shining down on her is imagery I love

Like idk why people aren’t mentioning that she’s literally a Christian and is highlighted in that part.

Stephanie was up late last night and couldn’t study bc she was arguing about the homophobic dog

Also crypto?

Also I think this song perfectly embodies what it’s like to be in high school?

Like it was killing me and I swore that I wouldn’t miss it after I graduated, and that I would always hate high school and that idk how I survived it

But now as an adult I’m like damn while I hated going to school it was something about those days that I miss so much. And I only graduated 5 years ago.

09)Bully the Bully

BE COOL BEANS

Keep the beans cool

Bean school

Also I think we’re starting to show that I have a very special place in my heart for Angela

I love how she performs and portrays characters

Also the fact that they’re just singing about bullying the bully for all sorts of different reasons is funny to me

Petey gonna jump on out ✋😐🤚

Jäeger gonna Jäger out 🤘🤪🤘

Also actually was a funny plan that probably wouldn’t work irl but would be funny to watch on a school fight page

Also the fact that Max says that it’s the nicest thing anyone has done for him

08)Bury The Bully

Oh no 😥 she’s snapping again 😟

Please let this be a normal field trip

Give off same vibes

Also I love the layers in the song

Mariah does a good job

HACK ALL HIS LIMBS OFF (did you say hack all his limbs off?) YEAH!

Also very funny

Like Grace’s descent into madness is entertaining

RUTH IS GONNA CUT OFF HIS NIPS

Also shows how stupid they are because they literally could’ve said that it was an accident

It’s literally 5 of them

Just be like yeah we brought him here to scare him and his stupid ass decided to stand on top of some old ass wood and it cracked under him and he died.

But no listening to Grace they become criminals.

No one is gonna make Ruth their bitch

“Do you wanna get the fullest ride? Then start CUTTIN RIGHT ABOVE THE THIGH!”

07)Cool as I Think I Am

Song that shows up throughout the musical

Like it’s in almost every single song if you listen closely to the background

And honestly it’s so good

Because it makes me feel something inside

Like it plays as Richie dies

As Pete and Stephanie realize that she’s gonna have to kill him

At the very end in dirty dudes must die

It’s just an iconic song

Also Joey’s voice is AMAZING

“If I could finally break the rules I would know that IM NOT A LOSER”

Of HIS WORLD HE IS THE RULER

He’s as cool as she thinks he is and she’s as smart as he thinks she is

It’s so cute

Like it’s inspiring in a way

And it’s like he’s finding himself.

LOVE IT

OHHHHHHH SHUT UP-Max

06)Go Go NightHawks

ITS LIKE THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL YEAH

N

I

G

H

T

AHH AHH 🦅🦅

FIGHT 🥊💥

Fuck YOU CLIVESDALE GO GET FUCKED

YOU FUCKING LOSERS

I literally just love this song and that’s why it’s high

Like literally no other reason other than this song gets me crunk

I wanna whoop clivesdales asses

Bitch ass hoes

Like I did not like my own school rallies this much

But I would love to aten one of these football games

05)Hatchet Town

He is Dan Reynolds with Action News

WHOS SWINGING THE HATCHET NOW?

I think her name is Bryce I am not sure

But the pretty woman who sings the slow part

So beautiful and her voice is literally out of this world

“I REMEMBER BEFORE THE LOCKDOWN THE SUN WAS SHINING ON OUT TOWN AND OUT KIDS COULD WALK THE STREETS”

Literally I was blown away when I heard this part

And I honestly just really like this song

Like it perfectly portrays how people act when anything happens

Like shifting the blame and causing hysteria when all you really need to do is be vigilant and listen to what the professionals are saying

But then also the people in charge don’t know what they’re doing so it’s like WTF do we do

“YEAH ITS GOT TO BE DONNA”

It’s a chaos song that depicts people properly

I feel like most of their songs depict people pretty well.

Like yeah it’s exaggerated but it’s accurate as well.

I also like dancing around to this song like I’m being sneaky and gossipy

“Someone’s got their hands on the hatchet handle” 🕵️‍♀️🕵️‍♀️

04)Literal Monster

I LOVE THIS SONG

The only reason it’s not higher is because I listen to the other songs more

But OH MY GOD

everyone’s vocals immaculate

The dancing?

Amazing

Like actually literal monster is so good

“HE ROARS AND WE CRY HES THE REASON WE RUN AND HIDE”

Is her name Kim? I think this is Kim

I LOVE HER VOICE

Also everything about this song is just like YES this is how you do a musical

Also I think the guy who plays Max is named Will?

This is my first time ever hearing him sing and actually it’s so good

He’s the goofiest bully to exist like HUH

His little dancie dance is so funny

He’s like a Fortnite character

He doesn’t need anyone to tell him high school will be his peak

Also his obsession with Grace is so funny and comes out of nowhere.

And the fact that he hates nerds like her but somehow wants to smash even though there are more than enough people who are probably willing makes me think he genuinely likes her but would never admit it.

He’s a literal monster (lmao rip bozo)

03)Dirty Dudes Must Die

BROTHER

When I tell you I am obsessed

I mean I am literally listening to this song like a dozen times a day

And I sing it at the top of my lungs

I’m actually in love with this song

The only reason it’s not number one is that I like the vocals of the other songs better

“WHO WILL PRAY FOR YOU WHEN YOUR BODYS GONE? THIS IS THE CONSEQUENCE FOR WHAT YOUVE DONE”

Like YES

“ARE YOU HARD BC YOURE STRESSED?” (What?) “OR IS THIS A POWER I NOW POSESS?!”

Like yes girl use your haunted poosay to kill everyone YES

Like actually her arc is so good to me even though it’s like not what you’d expect/think would happen

Like you would be like oh Christian girl has sex and realizes that it’s not that bad and that she doesn’t have to be a radical religious person

But instead she’s like yeah okay I’m gonna use my new evil powers for GOD and now no one is gonna stop me

She goes from crazy to crazier and I love it

Angela is the love of my life

Like actually she makes me wanna act

And also be absolutely insane but that’s a different topic

Good song gets me hype.

02)Dirty Girl

YESSSJSJAKWOWKNSKWLA

I know this song makes people uncomfy

But I am a horny girl and this song literally gave me whiplash when I first watched like

GIRL ME TOO

Their vocals and just the song itself is so good

Like her struggle with staying true to her religion and herself but also now feeling lust and want for someone that she previously never would’ve thought about before

And it does prove that Max is right about Grace being kinky af because as we see her descent into madness the things that she’s into are things that I know Christian people would be horrified at

Like when they bring him to the Waylon house and he’s aggressive and she’s like OH YEAH THIS IS GOOD

This song is just like look at her try to deny what she’s feeling and look at her struggle with something that many other people religious or not struggle with and look at how badly she handles it

Like if her parents would’ve handled this better Max would not have died

She is hungry for more and now her judgement is all cloudy because of ONE BOY

Everything could’ve been avoided if she was raised to believe that lusting is okay, feeling those feelings is okay

You don’t have to act on them but LORD they aren’t something that is wrong to feel.

It just makes it worse when you try to suppress things

But alas she lives in a no moan household.

01)Nerdy Prudes Must Die

IM SO SORRY RICHIE BUT THIS SONG IS ICONIC

Literally the name of the musical

And rightfully the best song

Jon’s acting and voice is AMAZING

Will sounds amazing

Like actually I could not stop repeating the “will you pray for me, when I’m gone?” Part for WEEKS

Like I’m still singing it to myself

It’s so good

IM NOT A LOSER

Like brother how he just sings that part is like OH MY GOD

Like everything about this song is good

And the fact that Max is like Yeah I couldnt care less how you actively dismembered me and defiled my body(his nipples) and buried him in an abandoned old house.

Like everything about this song is also tragic

Because everyone is celebrating his disappearance

And at this point I feel like he has to have seen that they’re celebrating.

And he was so close to changing

We see that he’s an asshole because of his family life which is tragically the reality of a lot of bullies and hurt people in general

So to have him on the brink of maybe changing and then dying and being dismembered and buried in a place no one knows he’s buried in

Is so sad in a way

Like we don’t even get to see if he would have changed because he does

And when he comes back as a literal monster he’s hurt and angry and wants revenge on the people and people like the people that got him killed even if it was an accident.

This musical is genuinely so good UGH

[stray-cat-21]

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

“And away they all flew like the down of a thistle. But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight happy Christmas to all, and to all a goodnight!” Eddie read using one of his very best dnd voices. Little Jamie let out a yawn her big brown eyes hardly staying open. “Goodnight princess.” Eddie whispered kissing her on the head. “Goodnight love bug.” (Y/n) added copying her husbands actions.

“G’night mommy g’night daddy.” Jamie yawned. Eddie shut off the bedroom light leaving the room dimly illuminated by the night light. The couple exited out to the hallway. “Well Eds you ready to get started?” (Y/n) questioned grabbing her husbands hand. “Actually I haves surprise I’ll meet you downstairs!” Eddie exclaimed one of his mischievous smiles on his face.

(Y/n) sent him a questioning look that Eddie only responded to with a kiss. “I’ll be right down!” He grinned. (Y/n) simply shrugged heading downstairs. She took a seat on the couch waiting for her husband. After about ten minutes Eddie came bouncing down the steps.

Only now he was dressed in Santa Claus’s iconic get up complete with the beard and big belly. He had on his proudest smile.“Wow look at you!” (Y/n) giggled standing up to meet him. “Tada!” He cheered gesturing down to the costume.

“What’s brought all this on? I mean Jamie’s in bed she’s not gonna see you.” (Y/n) said with a small laugh. Eddie shrugged ducking his head a little embarrassed. “I know but if she’s anything like me she’ll probably try and sneak down to get a peak at the big guy. If she does I want her to see Santa putting presents out instead of well you know.” He said gesturing to himself.

“You Eddie Munson are an amazing father.” (Y/n) smiled leaning up to kiss Eddie on the lips. He grinned his big toothy smile wrapping his arms around his wife. “I try.” He mumbled against her lips between repeated kisses. “So Santa should we get started?” She hummed straightening his crooked red hat. “Well I think I'm entitled to some cookies first sweetheart.” Eddie beamed walking over to the coffee table.

“Oh yes Mr Claus my husband and daughter made those especially for you.” (Y/n) teased moving to stand in front of him. “Your husband huh?” he hummed, picking up the cookie as he took a bite of it. There was a pause as he chewed the chocolate chip cookie. “Isn’t he a lucky man to have such a prerty little thing runnin’ around and baking cookies.” Eddie continued letting his hand rest on his wife’s ass.

“Mr. Claus you’re very handsy, what would my husband think?” (Y/n) gasped playfully. “Well sweetheart good thing your husband isn’t here huh?” Eddie teased. He let the half eaten cookie fall back onto the plate. His large palm squeezed (Y/n)’s ass softly pushing her against his chest while slotting his leg between her thighs. Her own hand traveled over his makeshift belly made of a pillow under his shirt to wrap it around the back his neck.

“Now tell me Mrs. Munson, have you been naughty or nice this year?” He whispered in a sultry tone. His words made her want to rip that white beard he was wearing off and replace it by sitting on his face instead. Roleplaying wasn’t uncommon between the couple, but the whole Santa Claus thing was definitely a new one. “I’m always extremely nice sir.” (Y/n) whispered back putting on her most innocent smile. “But I can definitely be very naughty too if need be Mr Claus.”

“Why don’t you show me how naughty you can be then?” Eddie hummed. His now ring bare hand reached up to his face pulling the beard off. Eddie eagerly leaned in but she interrupted with a soft giggle gently putting the beard back in its place. Once the white beard was straightened (Y/n) leaned in kissing him. He laughed softly against her lips but didn’t question it, instead deepening the kiss.

Little Jamie shot up in her bed as soon as she woke up not even fifteen minutes after being put to bed. The littlest member of the Munson family practically rocketed out of her bed to rush over to the window. Upon realising it was still night time and not time for presents she began to pout. She had definitely inherited her father's dramatics and even more so his knack for trouble. Sure it may not be time to open presents but it could be time to catch a glimpse at the man of legend.

Jamie had no idea what time it was or if her parents were still awake but she figured getting caught would be worth the chance to see Santa in person. Doing her very best tiptoe she shuffled out of her room to the top of the stairs. The only light left on downstairs came from the Christmas tree. Jamie slowly and quietly stepped down two steps not wanting to scare away Santa if he was truly there she peeked over the bannister of the stairs.

The small girls eyes immediately widened her mouth falling open when she saw the white bearded man with his big belly and signature red suit sitting in her dad’s usual spot on the couch. She would’ve hurried down the stairs to meet him if it wasn’t for her mother sitting on his lap, lips pressed against his. The man who gifted her with the toys she wanted every year, the one who paid her a visit every Christmas Eve, the one she stood in line for over an hour to see in the mall even if they had already done it five times. Jamie loved Santa of course she did, but he definitely was not her father. Only Daddy was allowed to kiss mommy on the lips, not Santa Claus or anyone else for that matter.

With teary eyes and a deep frown Jamie quietly storemed back up the steps running into her room. Normally she would have slammed the door shut with a fiery display of her emotions but right now her world was crumbling to the ground. Giant tears rolled down her cheeks quiet sniffles the only sound filling the room. Jamie crawled back into her bed shoving the covers completely over herself. The child felt absolutely positively betrayed.

Jamie was not only angry she was furious. Not just at her mom but Santa, and even a little at her father. The little girl was in utter shock of what she had seen . And where was her daddy while you betrayed him? He should’ve been there to stop it or even beat up Santa like he did with some of the bad people in her uncle Gareth’s stories.

The next morning (Y/n) woke up before her husband. As her eyes adjusted blinking away the sleep she was able to read that their clock on the bedside table read 8:15 AM. Now Jamie much like her father was not a morning person with four exceptions her birthday, Father's Day, Mother's Day, and especially Christmas. Even as a baby it seemed like as soon as the sun was up on Christmas morning little Jamie’s eyes were wide open. On previous Christmass their daughter would run into the room jumping on the bed in a rush to wake up both of them.

(Y/n) rolled over facing her husband who was currently snoring next to her. Eddie’s hair was everywhere and partially covering his face while one arm was stretched out around (Y/n)’s waist while the other was tucked under his pillow. She smiled reaching out to delicately push some of his hair back away from his face. “Eddie love.” She said quietly while letting her hand rest against his cheek. Eddie let out a groan in his sleep moving his face into the pillow.

(Y/n) playfully rolled her eyes moving closer to her husband pressing slow kisses against the side of his face. After a minute or two he finally looked up a sleepy smile gracing his features. “Morning sweetheart.” He croaked voice still deep from waking up. “Morning handsome.” (Y/n) grinned. Eddie turned his face again to press slow kisses against her palm.

“What time is it?” He mumbled against her skin. “About eight twenty Eds.” (Y/n) replied. Eddie furrowed his eyebrows looking over at the clock for himself. “Then where might our little dragon be?” He questioned fully sitting up in bed. “That is a very good question, if she’s anything like her father probably up to no good.” (Y/n) teased.

Eddie rolled his with a playful smile but still the pair got out of bed in search of their daughter. As they got out to the hallway they could hear some relatively quiet slamming around coming from downstairs. “Grab Jamie and go to our room.” Eddie demanded in a hushed voice. (Y/n)’s eyes widened at the thought of someone breaking into their house on Christmas morning. “Be careful please.” She pleaded earning a nod from Eddie.

(Y/n) took off to their child's room while Eddie crept his way down stairs. He wasn’t quite sure what he’d do if there was someone down there but he knew he needed to protect his girls no matter what. Thankfully when he got to the bottom of the stair he was met by the sight of his daughter causing all the ruckus. Jamie was stood by their Christmas tree seemingly pulling off specific ornaments and tossing them into a box. Even more surprisingly around the living room decorations with depictions of Santa Clause were torn down as well.

“Eddie Jamie’s not here! She’s not in her room!” (Y/n) yelled in a panicked voice bounding down the stairs. She stopped short next to her husband observing the same scene he was. Upon seeing her daughter the panic had left but was only replaced by complete and utter confusion. The couple shared a confused look before entering the living room all the way.

“Jamie princess.” Eddie started softly stepping closer to their daughter. This close up both parents could see the year streaks down the little girl’s face. This time when the couples eyes met both pairs were both filled with worry. Seeing her father Jamie dropped the thankfully plastic ornament she was holding to the floor running straight to him. She clung to his legs mumbling incoherently.

Eddie scooped his daughter up into his arms attempting to get to the bottom of this. “Baby what’s wrong?” (Y/n) questioned reaching out to attempt to push back her daughters wavy hair. The minute (Y/n)’s fingertips brushed Jamie’s brown locks the little girl jerked away. It was as if her touch burned her. (Y/n) flinched away recoiling her hand.

Her angry expression softened a little when she saw both her parents looking at her with such concern. Jamie couldn’t stop her bottom lip from wobbling, her emotions getting the best of her. As soon as tears started welling up in her big brown eyes, she pressed her face in Eddie’s chest latching onto the shirt he was wearing. "You and Mommy don't love each other anymore!” she cried, her words muffled. Eddie attempted to pull her away from his chest to hear her more clearly but Jamie only managed to cling tighter to him.

"An- and it’s Santa's fault!” Jamie continued with a loud sob. Eddie and (Y/n) shared a confused look frowning. (Y/n) again reached out gently brushing her daughter’s hair back. This time Jamie allowed the touch. "Jamie love, what are you talking about?" (Y/n) asked softly.

Jamie finally pulled away from Eddie and looked up to her mom, tears falling down her cheeks. "Oh momma, please don't leave daddy alone he can’t live without you.” She wailed stretching her arms out to (Y/n). She had been angry with her mother not even minutes ago but the thought of her mom leaving her to go live with Santa in the North Pole crushed her. (Y/n) immediately reach out pulling her little girl into her arms wiping the tears from her face.

"Don't leave me and daddy please momma!" She sniffled. "Jamie, where did you get that idea? I'm not going anywhere!” (Y/n) promised kissing Jamie’s head. Jamie responded by wrapping her arms around (Y/n)’s neck and hugging her so tight it was like she worried her mother might disappear the moment she let go. "But last night I-I saw you ki-kissing Santa." she sobbed into her mothers shoulder.

Eddie had to hide his mouth behind his hand to conceal a laugh. "Jamie love bug look at me please.” (Y/n) chuckled softly. Jamie finally pulled away her shoulders shaking with silent sobs lip still trembling. Eddie met (Y/n)’s eyes with his Cheshire grin waiting for her to explain to their daughter what she had actually witnessed. (Y/n) gave him a stern look begging for help.

Eddie cleared his throat standing closer to his wife and daughter. “Jamie, what you saw last night was really just mommy comforting Santa. Daddy forgot to put his milk out last night and Santa was got really sad, because he thought we had forgotten about him.” Eddie explained. Jamie looked at her father thoughtfully thinking about his words hard. "Yes baby girl and I told him a you would never let us forget about him and gave him a big hug and kissed him on the forehead like I do for you when you’re sad.” (Y/n) continued.

Jamie looked between her parents sniffling a little wiping at her eyes. "Really?" She questioned. “Promise kiddo.” Eddie added ruffling her hair. Jamie finally smiled straightening up a little. “Good daddies much prettier than Santa anyways.” She beamed.

Eddie smiled smugly wrapping his arms around his two girls. “Now that that’s taken care of what do you say you help daddy put the decorations back up before grandpa comes over?” (Y/n) suggests. Jamie nodded excitedly so (Y/n) sat her down on her own two feet. The little girl ran over excitedly placing ornaments back on the tree.

Eddie kept his wife wrapped up in his arms pulling her flush against his chest. "Seems like we might need to keep the costume for the bedroom huh sweetheart?” He hummed quietly in her ear. "Without the beard next time Kringle.” (Y/n) smirked. "I didn't hear you complaining when I was between your legs last night." he whispered teasingly. (Y/n) slapped his chest lightly smiling at him. “Yeah I was feeling festive Mr Munson but I prefer the real you any day.” (Y/n) grinned.

Eddie leaned in pressing a soft slow kiss against his wife’s lips. When they pulled apart they were both wearing a loving smile. “Daddy help!” Little Jamie whined. Both her parents turned to see Jamie struggling to put an ornament back on the tree now caught in tinsel. “That is definitely your daughter.” (Y/n) teased towards Eddie who shook his head going to help Jamie.

[fanaticsnail]

Snail! Another banger! You know what that means:

○“C’mon, now. What have I gotta do to get your layers off? Talk dirty to you?” He used the steel edge of his knife to attempt to pry the brown outer layer away.

●Not my home cook ass just using my hands 💀. In my defense, I'm only cooking for family lol.

○Cheeky Nami kisses, soft Robin kisses, and nibbled toothy kisses from Chopper were his favorites.

●The way I need these so bad??? Blink twice if you wanna hear my takes on these.

○ from Luffy which was used to depict the state of his appetite

●Kissing Luffy and him getting hungry halfway through. Him deciding you taste good enough and just continuing to kiss you. Don't worry, you two raid the pantry later (don't tell Sanji).

○the skeleton man had no lips

●A moment of silence to think about how terrifying Brook would be irl

○he was happy that the stinky moss-head kept his lips to himself.

●Me when I lie

○ you leaning on the side of the door

●OH this absolute nuisance (affectionate). She knows what she's doing. Going full seductive door lean? Are you trying to kill the poor boy? Something, something, Megara from Hercules.

○What's cooking, good looking?” you smiled at him softly, gesturing with your chin to the pot on the stove. He froze up, his ears tinting darker with the shade of pink.

●His ass could not go back to baraié, because he'd come back with twice the skill and a third of the rizz he left with.

○Taking the extinguished cigarette out of his lips, he placed the butt in the bin beneath the sink.

●Three trash bins in the strawhat kitchen. Wet Waste, Dry Waste, and Sanji's Cigarettes.

○“I actually love it. Even though it started as a joke, it has actually made a big difference the way I’ve been feeling lately.”

●#kissSanji2024

○throwing his head back and drawing up his forearm to his face to catch the damp blood from exiting his nose. His head was dizzy, his lips parting and whining as he felt your tongue swirl around the soft bite to his collar.

●MY MAN MY MAN MY MAN

○You squeaked in response, immediately placing your hands on Sanji’s hips as he pinned you against the sink with his hips

● Yes bitch! Grab that slutty little waist!

○"I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything, honest-" “-Sanji,” you laugh at him, looking up through half-hooded lashes and brushing your nose with his, “Your mirepoix is going to burn.”

● Them: https://images.app.goo.gl/r4ciH8S635FznucZ9

○“This stupid apron has been nothing but a complete distraction.”

●Snail, this is your sign to buy chef-husband a "kiss the cook" apron.

○Come find me when you want to put on that stupid apron again, hm?” you utter, releasing his hips and making your way over to the kitchen doorway

●She's such an icon! Came to the kitchen and kissed the prettiest boy on the ship! Made him literal putty in her hands! Made him burn his food! Kissed him again, and then left! Left while still flirting with him, hips swaying to Shakira Shakira! I want her! I NEED her!

Oof, this one was long. But what else to say after 1.5k+ of absolute art?

-♡♡ lots of love

Oh my gosh, I love your reviews and commentary!!

As a home cook married to a chef, peeling onions is my job. And I hate it. I do the good ol' halve it and pry it, but sometimes the skins are just a nuisance.

I am blinking twice. Give me your hot take on the kisses 😏.

Luffy kisses are just him gnawing in between waiting for dinner.

Brook has my heart and I love him. I'd still kiss. I wanna jam with him so bad.

"Me when I lie," I'm dying. I can't even. I love me a bit of zosan (see my strawhat Christmas fic 👀).

Yes, we are trying to kill him. With kisses.

The three trash bins, I can't even. I refuse to believe he'd taint the flavour of the sealife with littering the ocean. He knows better.

Kiss Sanji '24 ✊

I should absolutely but a 'kiss the cook' apron for chef-husband. If I get him for Krap Kringle this year, that's the first thing I'm gonna get.

This reader is Loca, and I loved writing the kisses like this. Kisses are my favourite.

Thank you for dropping lil' treats in my ask box. I love doing your requests, Anon! 😘🖤

[franklyshipping]

Tough Tootsies ~ A Markiplier Ego Fanfic

Here we have another fabulous anon prompt featuring our favourite gameshow host, but this time Yancy is by his side! LET'S DO THIS!

TAGGING: @bimlee-trimmer and @bim-trimler

Yancy was a tough guy, a cool guy. He was the sort of guy who, thanks to his days behind bars, had learned how to keep a straight face when things got nerve-wracking or intimidating. However, if you looked in his eyes long enough, you’d notice the flicker of nerves as he stood in the reception of the white-marble spa that Bim had brought him to. The luxury spa experience was something Bim had actually bought Yancy for Christmas, attempting to encourage him to relax and see the value of “me time” – but in true busy Yancy fashion he hadn’t found time to use it in-between writing, choreographing and practising new songs and music video shoots for his first album of music (the working title was Jailbreak and all the egos, Bim especially, thought it was iconic). So here Yancy was, having been persuaded thanks to Bim offering his company, and soon they were all signed in and heading to get to their first stop: free goodies.

‘So uh, what’s exactly gonna be done to us?’

‘Oh we’re getting the best treatments!’

Bim replied, grinning as the pair wandered through and started getting changed into their fancy, thick robes and slippers – which they got to keep no less! Bim’s attire was lilac whilst Yancy’s were navy, and Yancy smiled as he realised Bim must have called ahead to tell them his favourite colour.

‘First up is a hot stone massage, that’s the thing that’ll settle you into the spa day mood. Then we’ll have mud face masks, face, neck and scalp massages, and finish off with a full pedicure! You’re going to want a spa break every weekend after today, trust me!’

Bim nudged him with a wink and Yancy snorted, shaking his head fondly as they headed into the first room. Yancy was nervous about the day, mainly with regards to having strangers getting up close and personal with him. If Bim weren’t here with him he likely wouldn’t have had the confidence to give it a try… but as the treatments came by, it was far less invasive than Yancy was expecting. Everyone was so relaxed and chatty, always checking in on his comfort, telling him what they were going to do before he felt any touch – and of course Bim knew all the personnel and kept awkward silences at bay with gossip and banter.

Yancy found himself especially enjoying the gossip, especially when it came to his wild experiences from prison, which all the staff were excited to hear rather than unnerved! Yancy got so relaxed at one point that he fell right asleep during the scalp massage, having a deep twenty minute power nap which somehow refreshed him like a full night’s sleep – soon Yancy wasn’t just comfortable, he was enjoying every second of the experience. Also needless to say, he felt tensions unwinding in him that he hadn’t realised he had!

Eventually they got settled into comfy leather seats ready for the full pedicure treatment, and naturally Bim had even convinced him to pick a nail colour – Yancy went for a matte navy blue, whilst Bim chose a metallic violet. Yancy was all set and ready to relax again, even closing his eyes in anticipation… meaning he missed the cheeky grins Bim shared with the technicians. There was mischief afoot, no pun intended. In Bim’s view Yancy had been overworking himself and not only deserved relaxation, but a chance to let loose… to laugh. And the previous treatments had put him beautifully off guard.

Yancy sighed as he felt his feet gently get washed in warm water and carefully patted dry, and he could feel another nap coming on… until he felt the warm pumice stone. His foot was held still as the pumice stone’s fine grained surface rubbed against the ball of his foot. It wasn’t uncomfortable, certainly not painful… but it tickled like hell. Yancy’s breath hitched as his gripped his arm rests, glancing to Bim beside him. Bim however was perfectly relaxed, and took another sip of his champagne as he sighed.

‘So, is it safe to say I’ve converted you to the spa lifestyle Yance?’

Yancy gaped for a moment, feeling a giggle building in his chest. He held it in, clearing his throat as he smiled at his friend – he couldn’t burst into giggles here, it would be the most embarrassing thing ever! He took a deep breath, resolving not to react and make a scene.

‘Mhm oh yeheah, yeah for sure.’

‘I mean, I get why you were anxious of course, it’s perfectly understandable to not want strangers touching you all over the place. But everyone here honestly takes the word ‘professional’ and goes above and beyond don’t you think?’

‘O-Oh mhm, mhm yep.’

Yancy replied, gritting his teeth as he felt the rubbing go on and on and on. Somehow it was worse than feathers or nails, even worse than the pointiest pen! It was like his deepest ticklish nerves weren’t safe, each rub sending jolts and tingles that just made him want to squeal and kick his feet! But he couldn’t, and felt his face go a bit pink from his efforts as his technician smiled at Bim’s compliments.

‘You’re too kind Mr Trimmer.’

The pumice stone left his foot and Yancy let out a quiet breath of relief, until he felt it being applied to his other foot. He could feel his toes twitching as he casually pressed his knuckles to his mouth, his eyes looking at anything else but his feet. How the hell could something tickle this much, and how was Bim so chill?! He was just as ticklish as Yancy, or at least that’s what Yancy had always thought. It was the public factor that made this so torturous. Being tickled at home wasn’t half as embarrassing as this… oh God if he laughed, would he get kicked out?!

Then, he almost did. He let out a sudden squeak and shuddered when he felt the pumice stone move to his heel. He missed the amused look between Bim and the technician, and the technician put on a concerned look.

‘Oh I’m sorry, is that spot tender?’

Yancy cleared his throat, smiling softly as he straightened in his seat. He knew he was bright pink.

‘Ah, no I uh, just got a chill.’

Bim hid a snicker behind his champagne glass as the technician smiled, keeping her composure as she replied.

‘Oh, your seat has a heating feature if you’d like to use it! If you lift up the left arm rest you’ll find all the buttons.’

She then put the pumice stone aside and Yancy smiled gratefully, thinking he was in the clear. He decided he deserved to feel toasty after all that, and snorted when Bim gasped dramatically next to him as he opened his own arm rest.

‘Oh my GOD I can’t believe I forgot about that!’

Yancy rolled his eyes fondly as Bim excitedly explored all the buttons, including the reclining and massage functions. Yancy could feel the tingles in his feet fading into relaxation, so much so he got ready to tease Bim for getting so excited. But then he felt the oil. His breath hitched as he felt it trickle over his feet and toes, filling the space with a soft, floral scent, and his jaw clenched as he felt it being massaged into his skin. Oh. God.

‘U-Uh… whahat–ah, what’s the oil f-for?’

‘Oh it’s to help revitalise your skin, and it’ll stop your feet drying out. The scent is lavender, is that alright?’

‘Yehep, mhm yep, yep ahall good…’

Yancy nodded, and now had no choice but to mask his little giggles with light coughs and clearing his throat. This did not escape the technicians or Bim’s notice, but they naturally pretended otherwise to keep the game going. Bim even sighed lightly with a grin.

‘Ahh, the lavender one is my favourite, it’s just so relaxing isn’t it Yance?’

Yancy nodded, and this time couldn’t keep his eyes off the massage as fingers moved up from his arches, getting closer and closer to his toes. He tried to reason that he could take it, that the massage wasn’t as bad as the pumice stone… but when those slick fingertips started rubbing his toes he held his breath. But in the end, it was no use. It was a tweak to his pinky toe after a few mere seconds that made him explode into his long awaited laughter.

‘SHIHIT!’

To Yancy’s utter horror he heard the technician giggle as Bim gasped, his grin turning devious as he clapped his hands together.

‘Aww there’s the ticklish guy I know! I gotta say you held out longer than I thought you would!’

Yancy’s eyes went wide with confusion… and then the realisation hit him. It was a set up. A goddamn tickly set up! Before he could even think to get up, Bim leaned over and pinned him snugly against his seat, capturing his arms as he chuckled at him. What’s more… the massage didn’t stop.

‘WHAHAHAT THE HEHECK?!’

He kept laughing at varying pitches as the pads of his toes were gently rubbed, but occasionally he would feel the flutter of nail tips right under his toes too – that got him squealing, despite his best efforts, complete with voice cracks too. His cheeks were crimson with embarrassment as he squirmed about. How could he not have seen this coming? Bim was notoriously a mischievous little shit, he should have known there was something going on!

‘Aww look at those red cheeks, is someone flustered?’

Yancy snorted, and failed in his attempt to glare at Bim as he kept trying to wriggle free. His toes were constantly scrunching as he laughed and laughed and laughed, before ending up hiding his face against Bim’s shoulder in defeat.

‘YOHOHOU’RE AHA JAHAHACKASS!’

Bim gasped in mock offense, and tickled under his chin lightly as he retorted.

‘Am not! I just wanted to see a smile on that handsome face! Don’t you feel lighter and more relaxed?’

‘NAHAHAT RIHIHIGHT NOHOHOW!’

Bim and the technician’s laughed at his exclamation as Yancy kept his face hidden, his embarrassment hitting its peak… because admittedly the tickles were wonderful. Different tickles could be wonderful in different ways, and for Yancy slow, tender tickling at his worst spot like this was a truly heavenly sort of hell. He felt so warm and giddy and happy inside as the minutes went by, each toes given lashings of attention with rubs and flutters which seemed unending! And naturally Bim couldn’t help but keep on teasing him.

‘Listen to that laugh! You look like you’re having lots of fun, I think we should make this a regular appointment for your ticklish toes.’

Yancy’s blush crept up to his ears, and he let out a loud yelp when he felt the tickles stray in-between his poor sensitive toes. He exploded with babbles as his whole body jolted, and he reached his limit.

‘AHH–ALRIGHT ALRIHIHIGHT S-STAHAHAHAP!’

Bim giggled fondly, and the technician immediately stopped as she and her colleague giggled with huge grins on their faces, and even in his breathless state Yancy could see they weren’t making fun of him; their looks were just as fond as Bim’s. He panted softly as they moved away to prepare the next treatment, and his eyes fluttered shut as he stayed resting against Bim’s shoulder. Bim rubbed his back lightly, grinning.

‘You good?’

Yancy giggled lightly, nodding as he took a few deep breaths.

‘Y-Yeheah…’

‘You’re not mad at me are you?’

Yancy snorted, shaking his head as he grinned bashfully and gave him a tired nudge.

‘Nah… I uh… I actually do feel pretty good. Been hard to find time to chill out recently, y’know…’

Bim smiled at him with understanding. Yancy had been busy, working so so hard, putting pressure on himself. It was why he’d come up with this tickly relaxation scheme in the first place, just to give him a chance to let it all go for a bit. He squeezed Yancy’s shoulder softly.

‘I know, what’s why I knew I had to bring you.’

Yancy felt warmth in his chest at the gesture, then narrowed his eyes and laughed at how smug Bim’s grin was. He poked him in the ribs as he grumbled.

‘Sneaky asshole.’

Bim chuckled, and reclined back in his seat with a wink, picking up his champagne once more.

‘Love you too jailbird. So, are you ready for a little more?’

Yancy giggled softly, and nodded bashfully as the technicians returned. When the massaging resumed, Yancy didn’t hold back his delighted giggles this time, and felt the relaxation and comfort swell through him like a warm wave. Sometimes you don’t know you need something until someone else shows you that you need it, and though it’s sometimes hard to think so, everyone deserves the relaxation and laughter the world has to offer.

WOOO I KNOW THIS ONE IS LONG-AWAITED SO I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE IT, LEMME KNOW IF YA DO! LOVE YOUS!!

[onebraincell-itmiebcraft]

Liveblogging real life part 2: Joel (it's been 12 13 days) (already watched)

Okay so maybe we'll do the liveblog-every-five-minutes-unless-something-crazy thing also idk if I should link this up to my intro post (idk how) or reblogged my og one with this oh well we'll figure it out why am I eating AGAIN doing this

I got inspired after rewatching secret life my beloved for the umpteenth time :P

Okay ep. 1/finale is hilarious and new "series" 😭

Joel why did you point out the cursor I can't take my eyes away

First batch

Joel jumping then immediately keeling over in nausea:

Idk how to respond to that but it struck a chord within me, how true

BigB wholesome waving but it also looks like his arm is BENT I can't get over VR arms man 😭

Punching BigB because he's so tall is so real tbh + love the smash cut to Gem being salty

Headpatting + baby-ish voice "little gem/Ren/skizz" what a gentleman makes me think of the try not to cry challenge or Jimmy's crazy christmas series where he says Joel is a crybaby and Gem says he's a romance guy in a mental gymnastics train of thought

Grian throwing his head back from the outside?! Cryptid behaviour

The real life vids don't make me motion sick but Joel making retching and vomiting sounds does NOT help it makes me sick by proxy or something I hate being disoriented and nauseous too buddy

There's probably a video out there of someone comparing regular mc to vr because vr just hits different like proportions wise

Joel noises

Love this Joel-Gem duo already idk how to describe it just fun

Also Joel having to process out loud he won't throw up on Gem I remember playing Richie's plank experience or whatever years and years ago shit was REAL

Joel's inventory becoming disorganized with things that can be stacked together :(

Hey what gem said kinda reminds me of what grian said :D at the end of his episode awful :DD

Poor Joel he's battling his height complex alongside his motion sickness (rip bozo poor little meow meow)

I think almost everybody had the problem of facing the wall dude, it's okay it's very silly

Water foreshadowing (he will swim with his future gang and become incredibly sick)

Geminislay that pig

Wait till Joel learns about lying down‼️‼️

JOEL STOP MAKING NAUSEOUS SOUNDS I'M GONNA FROW UP 👹

"...Falling in powdered snow" kinda reminds me of this short story I read in grade 9 English class "The Bamboo Trap" protag fell in The Bamboo Trap™ and got bitten by big ass spiders or something the idiot, also I think got published in the same anthology as the most dangerous game 👊

Joel admits to weakness

Weird ass snow, someone built this or something?

Joel with his arms out looks so silly, so does gem

Oh gem how graceful with the figure skating history 👊👊👊✌️👉✌️✌️🤜🤛🤛🤜🙏

Lol they learn about the wrist chat

Second batch

Jimmy, oh iconic Timmy

Shield (why did I write this again?)

Bi shoes, love seeing gem's skin wearing the bi shoes I forget about it every once in a while and when I see it again it's a pleasant surprise

Vr players learn to pvp

When you use the shield to block in first person it looks kinda stupid dude

Campsite vibes tbh, I really like it.

Bee spotted 🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝 what is it doing

Shaky controller cursor over top chest plate I feel you

Falling irl indeed (recursive mention about plank)

LOUD holy moly Joel is loud (not negative)

Healf being something people can't look at at all times is actually a kinda funny mechanic

Smajor friendship aww when will they team up (did I forget about a series)

The poor beg for bread, we live in a society ✊😔

Grian killing??? Since when??? (Sarcastic)

Batch three

Peace and love is why they haven't died yet 😘

Arms again! Weird looking things

Hand gesture reminds me of that one diamond scar short with etho's greedy "I want the diamond" voice

Flint and steel? Weird looking thing

Omg red club looks like bugs, the way the trio gossips about them ♥️

Right no out messages...

Can't believe the most motion sick man gets in the water not once but TWICE this ep

Does he know

Where did the horse thing come from

Can't remember if I mentioned this but when the sword swings without critting in VR it looks so silly it pokes

A bugs life: the sequel

Club: deadly euphemism

Sword 😐

Something about jimmy doesn't get burnt...

Why is Jimmy jiggles the only one with a wooden sword???

Strong words from a man on the verge of mania 👀

Lol knowing impulse breaks the ground under Joel big brain man going for the kill

Something about the disappointed way Joel says "scar!" And scar stabbing him in the first caused this

Tim is so British he says "get in" so much

Joel, again exasperated, cries out "where's all my stuff?!"

Funny Minecraft men, my favourite funny Minecraft men

My god seeing from Joel's perspective his second death is from zombie

I think Joel was about to saying bluming + the cover behind house + the constant begging for his stuff back + violence as an answer (he hits men)

4

Oh scar up to no good again

JOEL GETS IN THE WATER AGAIN!!! MOTION SICKNESS WIN!

Joel and scar just did mitosis stop being scared of biology 🙄

What was Mr solidaritygaming doing in that hill and said yes to did he finally get iron?

Aw the silly arm motion I love greeting people with spirit fingers reminds me of that

GOON SQUAD?! (neuron activated)

Famous moment

Oh more famous moment here comes the smallidarity kiss

Love Tim's body language once again the sharp smooth head turn to grian he's like a cartoon character

(what grian mean they are suited and booted he cut this part out I don't remember the other povs 😢)

Leave it to solidaritygaming himself to be the most homoerotic straight man there is of course + Joel is still patting him on the head? + Timsel being cringefail needing to jump multiple times on ONE BLOCK + Joel did NOT need to lean that much he looks like he's powered by springs + Jim's arms always being so tight together. Makes him. Look like. An old granny??? + Joel IMMEDIATELY checking his wrist afterwards like it's a Tuesday and he's on break + homophobic GRIAN + impulse's dad delivery one liner

The more I watch smallidarity kiss the more bizarre and asinine it becomes to me 😀

When did Joel learn to button jump (he WAS mental for jumping irl irl)

Okay Joel cut out that canary comment why don't you 🙄🙄🙄

WHACK 💀 SHAKE YOUR HANDS REAL FAST 💀💀 JOEL SCREAM #3997 💀💀💀

Fond of Joel's cadence of saying "hello guys!" And "I'm coming in boys!" And "HAHA!" oddly musical

Okay aaaaaaand he dies worst ranking ever good for him the end

Idk if I should liveblog scar next or watch Ren because I've already watched up to skizz + me 'ead 'urts oh well

[gaymer-hag-stan]

2023 SECOND GEN K-POP GG SONG ROUNDUP

The year is almost over, so I believe this is the perfect time for a song recap!

The girlies have been pretty busy this year as we have songs in Korean, English, Japanese and Mandarin Chinese!

•Hur Young Ji's "L.O.V.E.", from her digital single album, "Toi Toi Toi"

I still haven't figured out why DSP thinks that's how her family name is spelled in English, but Youngji's (third) solo debut was by far my favourite re-release of TAEYEON's "Weekend" this year! I love the colours, I love her hair, the looks and I even like her Bora-esque talk-rap segment after the first chorus!

•SUNMI's "STRANGER", from her digital single album of the same name

Sunmi has mastered the art of delivering gorgeous MVs and visuals, that's for sure, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit I was a bit disappointed. I like the instrumental she used for the chorus, and since it was the segment playing in the teasers as well, I thought she was gonna give us "Tim Burton movie OST realness", and she did... But then she went and mixed in a completely different instrumental for her verses and bridge and another one for the pre-chorus. Girl why 😭

•TAEYEON's "To. X", from her mini-album of the same name

Taeyeon is continuing her reign as the queen of second gen with her moody breakup songs and I wouldn't expect anything less from her. Not her strongest effort yet, but still fun to listen to.

•HYOLYN's digital single, "This Love" (feat. Random Guy No. 8)

Hyolyn is the queen of cunt, but it's still a nice change of pace when she releases cutesier / less sexy songs. The guy being a dog in the MV was a hilarious twist too!

•Sandara Park's "Festival", from her self-titled digital mini album

Dara finally released the mini she has been teasing for a while now and had her solo comeback after FOURTEEN years! I hope this isn't a one time thing and she actually releases more music. She may not be the strongest vocalist, but Dara was always an idol's idol like, she would do the 2NE1 choreos while looking gorgeous and serving face and smiles so solo projects like this re-release of TAEYEON's "Weekend" are the perfect chance to showcase more "stereotypical", if you will, K-pop visuals and concepts that we wouldn't really get out of 2NE1. And she even got Uhm Jung-hwa, one of her own idols, to cameo on the MV, sampled her song for this comeback, and got to guest at her concert! Way to go Dara!

•HYO's digital single, "Picture"

A solid release from our resident DJ, although I still think her early works and the unhinged "DESSERT" haven't been topped yet. At least it wasn't "Second", I HATED Second.

•SoYou's "ALOHA" (feat. Bora), from her mini-album, "Summer Recipe"

Soyou giving us "Queen of summer"! YES! This is definitely among my favourite releases this year. It's catchy, it's summery, it's dancey and she's SANGING as usual. The fact that she even got Bora to do the most unhinged 3 second rap of her career for this is iconic! A bit disappointed she's not in the video but I guess maybe appearing for just 3scs wasn't worth it... Still curious how Hyolyn convinced her to do just that for the upcoming SISTAR19 comeback. Maybe she promised her she'll sing as much as Dasom did for "Summer or Summer"?

Also, you know what I was thinking?

This is probably delusions of a senile homosexual, but having a SISTAR19 comeback in the middle of winter is weird. I know Hyolyn did previously release a summer-themed Christmas song but... What if this is a prelude for a SISTAR full group comeback..? Think about it!

•Park Bom's digital single, "I" (feat. A Victorian Era Ghost)

Yes Bommie! This was BEAUTIFUL 😍❤️! I love that she seems to have regained control of her voice in her recent releases? In the years after her comeback with Dara her singing sounded a little... Off? But since last year she seems to be back on track! She even actually got to appear in her own MV this time, I'm so happy!

•Jessica's "BEEP BEEP", from her mini-album of the same name

Okay, this is definitely my favourite song of hers so far like... Yeah, this was the third version of "Weekend" for the year but I don't even care, she nailed it. It's fun, it's cute and she SINGS her ass off. Yass cunt!

Now PLEASE release something more dancey and edgy, bitch..! I'm still not over that one performance of "How Deep Is Your Love" where she was serving c word all those years ago but then NEVER released anything remotely close to that like... what gives girl??

•SoYou's "Digital Single That Doesn't feature Bora"

Soyou had another release this year before her summer comeback that didn't get as much publicity. It's a much more mellow song and not cunty but she gets to showcase her voice and it's a nice song to listen to.

•Nicole's digital single, "Mysterious"

Okay, this I think might be my favourite song overall this year! Nicole picked up on the "YOU.F.O." and, of course, "MOVE AGAIN" momentum from last year and she definitely delivered! She is so mother in this it's insane. Gotta love that bass!

•Nicole's physical single, "Selfish"

And she continued with a Japanese comeback this time! It even charted decently in Japan, like top 20, I think? So girl SLAYED! Glad to see they still got it with Japan. Amazing.

•Amber Liu's digital single, "No More Sad Songs"

A good song from miss Amber. I think her Chinese fans must have liked it too because she also released a Mandarin version. Definitely her best out of the ones she released this year although, if I'm 100% honest, Amber's music is kind of middle of the road for me? It's not bad, it's not amazing, it's just okay. Good for her that she's still at it and doing her thing though.

•Raina's digital single, "The Way We Were"

Raina is back girlies! Glad to see she's still representing the After School girlies in the music scene as she's the only one still releasing music here and then. Luckily, this time she didn't have to resort to collabing with Trash E for this song!

•Amber Liu's digital single, "hatemyself"

Okay, this one is the darkest of her songs yet and, for real, I know everyone has been dragging Amber through filth ever since that stupid pro-cops comment she made, and she definitely deserved the backlash for that, but it did get pretty ridiculous after that like, I can't help but feel for her. She wasn't my favourite f(x) member, her solo music is not my favourite either but I do genuinely hope she is okay?

•NARSHA's digital single, "BLUSH"

Okay so, at first I was like "Is this bitch really making her first solo release in thirteen years a ballad?" But then she released "GAME" so the balance of nature was restored, but other than that this song genuinely did grow on me. It's a nice song and it really fits her voice and breathy singing style.

•Meng Jia's "KNOCKOUT", from her mini-album, "JIALAND"

So, Jia seemingly decided to release the most UNHINGED song of hers yet this year. The production is messy but in a "so messy it's good" type of way. The red hair was a serve and this was a very fun song. Except that weird change at the very end, what the fuck was that for? Someone deserves to get fired for that, she should change producers.

•NARSHA's digital single, "GAME"

I want to once again publicly apologize for ever doubting mother. This was a song for the ladies and the gays only and I know and love that she 100% knows it herself and owns this fact. BEG are among the cuntresses in the K-pop industry that actively and openly acknowledge their LGBT fanbase and regularly release songs about female empowerment and feminism in a non-performative and genuine way, so this was definitely a gift for us and I love her for that.

If you will indulge my delusions for a second time, I'd like to think that, like SISTAR, those OG hags are cooking up some new group music and Narsha's very unexpected comeback is a prelude to the group's.

•Nicole's "Gravity", from her single album of the same name

This is definitely not as strong as the other two releases this year but it doesn't matter because we shouldn't be greedy and it's still a fun song so it's all well. Bold move to release a summer song way out of season again too.

•Jea's digital single, "Congratulations to You"

This is a very sweet song honestly. JeA said she wrote this all the way back in 2010, I think, as a means to cheer up herself for all the things she had already accomplished and her future self if she was ever feeling like she wasn't doing enough. I think she also said she had been singing it live regularly whenever she was performing, she did have a solo concert either late last year or very early this year, if I'm not mistaken, and she decided it was time to release it properly.

My only minor complaint is that the "be happy day to you" part kind of takes me out of the sentimental moment 😅😭 I know nonsensical English is the bread and butter of K-pop, and I will forever be grateful for lyrics like "I'm so bad girl I'm so cool girl I'm so sexy sexy sexy girl" or "fire in the hole when you touch me down there I'm not feeling very well so hot in down there" or "kiss me baby I'll must be stay here day by day" but for such a personal and sentimental song she maybe should have had someone double check it, just this once 🤣

•Wang Fei-fei's digital single, "Distance"

Fei seemingly decided that she should give the others a chance and not serve cunt, not mother, but take it slower and chiller instead this year. A good effort, but I had come to expect a bit more from her if I'm being honest.

Below you can find the full Spotify playlist. Enjoy!

Some honourable mentions:

~Whatever that short snippet that HyunA released is supposed to be, it's amazing! She also did it for the gays and the girls and I genuinely hope she revamps it into a full song and releases it because it's currently not available to stream anywhere, other than the performance video on YouTube of course.

~Various project and cover songs: Taeyeon and Naul's "Nights Into Days", Bom's cover of a 90s song, "Holding On to the End of This Night", Hyolyn's cover of a Chinese TikTok song, "Fizzled", and JeA's "Rainy Day" for the Yaoki Project.

~Some b-sides from Taeyeon's mini worth checking out: "All For Nothing", "Fabulous" and "Nightmare"

~Jessica's collab with Amber, "Get It? Got It? Good"

~Hyolyn remembering to fulfill her cunty quota for the year and releasing a performance video for "BODY TALK", one of the b-sides from last year's mini.

~Although she said "No More Sad Songs", Amber went and immediately released three more. "hatemyself" was the better of the three, but she also did "Can't Go Yet" and "ILY".

~Jia's "GOOD GOOD LOVE" from her "JIALAND" EP and another song she silent-dropped a few days ago, "Starlight".

No T-ara reps at all this year as they were all real busy playing golf... I HATE THEM 🤬😭

[ratguy-nico]

Character Asks: Louise!

SAILOR! thanks girl, you never let me down T^T so Louise:

First impression: no one kill me... I used to hate Louise XD you see how many people hate Gene's character for no good reason except they find them annoying?...well that's what happened to me with Louise, the irony

Impression now: I should say I love Louise, she has some of the most amazing episodes of all the show and her bunny ears are an amazing element of character design that should be study but... is complicated? I watch Louise and see so many things, some rough, complicated aspects that I truly love, I love how the serie portray her, I think is the fetish character of the serie, which for me is not 100% something good.

Favorite moment: damn The Plight Before Christmas for sure, her whole speech, but I think this is like a good writing scene and it's not so much cause it's Louise, so I would say when she's trying to teach Tina how to kiss. las cachetadas XD oh oh and her phone call with Mickey, oh that one is priceless XD

Idea for a story: Non, okey fine, like I said before, no for an episode or inside the serie's canon. But in the comic that I would never mention again after this I explore a lot of Louise being non binary tirando a transmasc but being lesbian, complicated? complicadisimo. So thats all I will say.

Unpopular opinion:... all the shit I just said? I love Louise's episodes, she's being the protagonist of many of the best episodes on the show "The Plight Before Christmas" and "Amelia" without counting the movie. But... it may be...too much? DONT KILL ME I would love if they take the same dedication, the same deep approach, to Tina or Gene, or any other character actually, like they did with Rudy's episode where she is relevant but in a supporting role. Im gonna shut up now.

Favorite relationship: NOT ROMANTICALLY Louise and Rudy, damn I live for that friendship, those two are the most precious thing in the world they would kill for each other, die for each other but most important live for each other, saw my previous complains? throw them away when is the Louise and Rudy duo Im talking "Bridge Over Troubled Rudy" "House of 1000 Bounces" and "The Amazing Rudy", of course. Bob and Louise father/child dynamic is pure gold and in ship department (and this could also count as unpopular) Louise/Jessica Wharfy ship. Uh and just think about it but I love Louise dynamic with Nat and Mickey, I think they are totally Louise's heroes.

Favorite headcanon: ...non? Louise being lesbian but also a lil bit of a boy is very... in me. Oh i have a very silly one, remeber the episode when Louise adopted a spider and call her Phoebe? for me Louise give her that name for Phoebe from the show Friends, who is a very important icon in the bisexual and lesbian community, so yeah. Louise loving her lesbians icons.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Have you read the Maiden Lane series? I know is a long one so I was wondering if you could rank them? I have only read up to book 5

Omg YES. I love Maiden Lane. It's so good. An all time favorite series of mine. I will say: I haven't read Wicked Temptations a) because I hear it's kinda different from the others, not surprising because it's a first book and b) it took me forever to find in paperback (I mean to be fair I could've totally gotten it on eBay lol, but I forgot and I finally found it at a used bookstore) it's never in any of my library systems in paperback or E, and I didn't want to get it on my kindle if I could possibly find it on E. c) Now I'm down to two full length Hoyt historicals and she's a top author for me, so I'm kinda saving it.

But yes, of the ones I've read:

Thief of Shadows--I find this to be an incredible book, it has my favorite virgin hero of all time, I love the emotionality, the lack of a magic baby, an incredible hero/heroine dynamic. I will never not love this book.

Scandalous Desires--another one I just adore, it has one of my favorite "rakish her/moral heroine" dynamic. I love that she is very pure but she's not a virgin. I love the baby in this book, rare for me. I love the pirate ship setting. The way she says "I love you" during sex and he climaxes IMMEDIATELY lol.

Duke of Midnight--this is apparently a controversial but brave opinion, because Maximus is a SUPER alpha, kinda major asshole hero. I just love the quiet but firm way that Artemis responds to him, and his totally deluded dirty talk (he calls her Diana, he tells her while he's literally inside her about how he's gonna keep her in a hunting lodge and shit lol), the sex scenes are FIRE. The line "take my come for it's all I can give you" is WILD and I adore it. Also, HE IS THE NIGHT!!! AND HE HAS A GEORGIAN HOME GYM.

Sweetest Scoundrel--I really love a hero who seems like a rogue but actually has a deeply good and gentle heart once he realizes that the heroine isn't as tough as she seems, and Asa Makepeace IS that. I love that he's so respectful of Eve's boundaries while also really admiring her emotional strength and willingness to try new things with him. Also--that carriage scene? GIRL. GIRL. ICONIC.

Duke of Sin--I just really admire the absolutely insanity of this book. I also enjoy a villain hero who really doesn't reform at the end. He's just in love. He still does villainy, but he's found love and he prioritizes his love. Also, Bridget, similarly to Artemis, watches his carnage and goes "Well" which is a thing I have a weakness for. Just a heroine shaking her head and being like "I don't know what I expected.

Dearest Rogue--this one is really sweet, especially by the bananas standards of Maiden Lane. I love a bodyguard romance, and I also appreciated the fact that the heroine was blind and a good bit younger than the heroine but not infantilized. Plus, it's a good roadtrip romance.

Lord of Darkness--a "put a baby in me" romance, which I ALWAYS love. I love that this one has a mild-mannered professor type hero who like, wears spectacles and a "Night Before Christmas" sleeping cap lol. But he puts it DOWN. After an initially awkward encounter. I also love an initially awkward encounter.

Duke of Pleasure--the Return of the Ghost of St. Giles, one of the truly wildest "fakeout makeout" (except it isn't fake and is waaaay more than a makeout lol) scenes, and a cross-dressing heroine initiated into the sensual world~ by an older man. So fun.

Notorious Pleasures--controversial for cheating reasons (and Maximus is introduced and... really doesn't come off well lol) but I find it so fun. Very illicitaffairs.mp3, kinda low stakes compared to a lot of the other books, a solid romp.

Duke of Desire--this one is VERY dark and very intense, and while I think it's a beautifully written recovery book, I found it a lot heavier than Sweetest Scoundrel. Which isn't a wrong move, but it is a very sad, very emotional book you really need to be in the right emotional place for.

Darling Beast--I really need to reread this one, because I don't know if I was in right mood for it. And I do appreciate the interplay between the hero and heroine, the fact that the heroine has a job (and is an actress) and the fact that they can't speak to each other for a good while? Like I said, really need to reread.

But overall, even a mid Maiden Lane book is better than a lot of other historicals. Elizabeth Hoyt just has IT. I love the fact that these books are often about more working class or middle class characters, not just the nobility. I love the big, ambitious, wacky plots. I love the heat factor (she writes a great sex scene). It's just great.