#had to use my human sized body to get it to fly out the open door. i succeeded. it couldn't hurt itself enough by flying against a window

[schadenfreudich]

Why the fuck the is the European robin called "Rotkehlchen"? This little guy does not have red throat. That is so incredibly orange.

[simping-overload]

hi how are you? If requests are still open can I request headcanon for Transformers Prime? (predaking, shockwave and megatron) with a reader who is literally a dragon? The reader has kept a Cybertronian relic for a long time.

Megatron, Shockwave, and Predaking with a Dragon! S/O

a/n: sorry for taking an ungodly amount of time to get to this, hope you like it!

wanna support me? donate to kofi!

tags: GN reader, dragon reader, robot x monster/dragon relationship, reader isn't suggest to be a human at all. reader isn't described to be verbal but assume they have a way to communicate, dragon hoards, fighting, mention of blood and animal death(just hinted), romance!!!!

ヾthis is a multi-fandom blog that is designed for mlm/nbmlm identifying readers! so if you're female or fem, she/her, she/they please do not follow or interact with my mlm related post!! you will be blocked if you do not heed this warning ゛

Megatron —

finds you fascinating, often he can find himself just staring. taking in your beauty and the power the radiates off of you.

of course, he'd like to have you fight for his cause. an advantage for one, and he simply loves seeing you fight.

he'd love to have you train with him. That would depend on your size, though. he knows better than to try to fight. that would be roughly the same size as his ship. (He's a sore loser when he loses btw.)

beware, he might treat you like a pet if he had you at his feet while he pet the rough skin and scales alongside your body. he may accidently go onto a power trip with you

however, feel more than free to put him back in his place. you're much stronger than him at the end of the day

When you show him your hoard, he's intrigued. He views it as a trophy room, like the one he once had from his gladiator days.

If the relic isn't useful to him, he'd let you keep it, but if it is, he will take it from you, regardless of your protest.

Shockwave —

of course, he takes a scientific interest in you. collects your scales you shed, examines your claws, and likes to scale just how strong your fire is and a lot of other things.

His sharp claws are perfect for preening, especially in the stubborn hard to reach places. while he doesn't admit it and claims he only does it to collect them, shockwave finds it very relaxing.

he wouldn't bother trying to fight you, he'd however would like to fly with you. moslty flying out to places that have predacon fossils or lost Cybertronian relics.

he likes to observe how you fly with or against the winds, taking down notes as your body adjusts to flying in high or low altitudes.

When you showed him your hoard, he was indifferent. he saw no point in hoarding objects that wouldn't benefit you.

as he looked around your domain, he picked up and fiddled with some items that he was interested in.

upon finding the relic he asks to take it, if you say no, he'll simply scan the core things he needs from it and leave it there, but if you say yes, he'll have a ball. he might give it back to you once it served it's purpose.

Predaking —

at first, he'd thought of you as a threat. somone who would take his place as a king. it wasn't until he, of course, grew closer and got to know you were he dropped these thoughts.

if your size is similar or doesn't have a very drastic difference, he'd love to spar or play fight with you.

he has no way to consume animals, but he'd love to go hunting with you or watch you hunt, to say the least. finds the way you move with such grace and precision is simply amazing to him.

he likes the difference between his metal and your scales. Feeling your body up against his is an odd sensation but very much welcomed. he's godly at preening your scales and would do anytime anywhere.

flying with you is one of his favorite pastimes with you. he most definitely tries to show off his flight capability as well, doing a wide variety of tricks and flips.

courting dancing/flights are a must. he's unfamiliar with his, but they're so engraved into his(the former kings)muscle memory that he'd remember as he went on with the courting.

when you respond with a dance of your own, he's smitten 10x again. Likes to learn your dance if you'd teach him.

also during courting and even after or before he likes bringing you gifts. Random trinkets he thinks you'd find joy in having.

upon being introduced into your hoard his is amazed. It was one of the most beautiful places he has seen.

unless the relic relates to him, he wouldn't bother doing anything with it, simply leaving it there alone unless shockwave may request it.

[deathmetalunicorn1]

Nico Robin!Reader with Loki, Buddha, Tesla, Beelzebub, Jack, Ares, Hermes, Rudra, Hades, Hercules and Platonic Zerofuku

She fights against Athena or some brutish god that doesn’t care about destroying Human History, which angers her and she smiles as she reveals her ‘Devilish Side’ (Using Demonio Fleur, which horrifies her opponent and they’re begging for mercy, only for Reader to break their spine) when some random god says her win doesn’t count because she ‘Cheated’ she uses her power and… crushes his balls (I love Robin she’s my queen 💖)

she calls (Love) a Squirrel when he eats with his cheeks stuffed with food (She calls Loki adorable when he messes up with his transformations) and her dark sense of humor keeps people on their toes

-As you walked out, following Athena’s over the top entrance, many were a little disappointed, as you didn’t seem anything special, you weren’t dancing or doing any fancy moves, you weren’t even holding a weapon! How are you going to fight Athena of all goddesses with no weapons?!

-Athena smirked down at you, but she was a little surprised, seeing that you didn’t look at all bothered, as the humans cheered for you. It was a little odd, as you remembered, for most of your life, humans were hunting you, wanting the bounty on your head, believing the government that you were a demon and needed to be destroyed.

- As the fight started, you crossed your arms in front of you, “Mil Fleur: Gigantesco Mano!!” hands started to surround you, forming into something bigger and bigger, before two massive hands appeared and you controlled them, swinging out to open-hand strike at Athena who only barely blocked the first one, but was sent flying with the second one.

-Many were stunned, seeing your abilities, several were shouting that this ability was illegal- but Zeus did relent, as it was a part of you when you had died, it was legal, but that still didn’t please everyone.

-You and Athena traded blows back and forth and you were panting heavily, injured and you needed to wrap this battle up soon. Athena then smirked and changed her own form, to be one that towered over you, the same size of her statue in Athens as she smirked down at you, “How will you handle this?!”

-You just smirked, stunning her as you closed your eyes for a moment, gathering what strength you had left, “Demonio Fleur~” eyes went wide as your own body seemed to grow and grow, your skin turning to almost pitch black with a red tint, horns and wings sprouting from your body, making you look like an actual demon.

-Many were terrified to see this form, but so many were also stunned, seeing that you could transform into a demon, despite being a human.

-Athena was terrified of you, demanding you to get back, shocking so many, as she was regarded as one of the bravest gods, and many were shouting for you to let her go as you managed to grab her. She was still trying to insult you, trying to break free as you both started screaming, you from overexerting yourself, and her from pain as well as trying to get out.

-You then shouted out, “Gran Jacuzzi Clutch!!” and a sickening snap echoed through the arena, as you broke Athena’s back and she went limp in your arms, dying.

-Your demonic form faded as she fell to the ground and you were gasping for air, exhausted from the battle, but you couldn’t help but smile, hearing the cheers for you as you had won the whole tournament.

-Zues approached you as you stood, as he had promised, if humanity won this final match, he would grant your wish, and you stunned everyone by smiling, “Bring everyone back.” Zeus was surprised, hearing your wish, but he couldn’t help but chuckle, “Perhaps you’re not a demon at all, Y/N.”

-You just turned, walking away from him as everyone was reforming, as you needed to get to the infirmary, “No- others were the ones who made me like this. But I will wear the crown if it fits.”

-Another god, who couldn’t believe that you defeated Athena, shouted at you, “You cheated- that power of yours isn’t fair!!” you looked up at him and he froze as two hands appeared and everyone around him froze as you grabbed his balls, crushing them, making all men around fear you, or at least fear insulting you- you were quite cruel when you wanted to be.

-Your words stunned many, hearing that you weren’t a cruel person, but others deemed you one, claiming you were evil, and you remember a time in your life when you were, doing vile things , but after you met your captain- no… your family, you only did bad things to protect them and yourself. They had given you a second chance when nobody else would, and you wouldn’t let anyone who didn’t earn it take it from you.

-You were resting in the infirmary when one of the nurses said you had a guest and you opened your eyes, curious as to who was coming and when Zerofuku walked in, you couldn’t help but smile softly, welcoming him.

-Immediately he was across the room, lunging into your arms, which made you giggle softly, hugging him close as he sniffled softly, “I’m so glad you’re okay!” when he pulled back, tears streaming down his face, you couldn’t help but smile softly, brushing the tears from his cheeks, “I’m okay now, Zerofuku.”

-He sniffled again, “Pinkie promise?” you just smiled, knowing the truth behind pinkie promises, showing your more morbid sense of humor as you showed him both of your pinkies, “Which one do you want if I’m lying?”

-He froze, realizing what you had just said before he started wailing loudly, hugging you around his neck as you giggled softly before you heard another knock at the door.

-(Love) walked in, giving you a slightly exasperated look, “Really Y/N- you know you shouldn’t joke about things like that.” Your hand hid your lips as you giggled softly, Zerofuku pulling back to rub at his eyes as (Love) came over, sitting on the opposite side before he wrapped his arms around you, sagging into your embrace, “I’m so glad you’re okay.” You smiled softly, lifting a hand to stroke at the back of his neck, “I decided long ago that nobody was going to kill me unless if they earned it the hard way.” (Love) couldn’t help but chuckle- he knew that you were strong, you wouldn’t go down easily as your two boys, your lover and your adopted son, both doted on you as you were still recovering.

            -Beelzebub, Hades, Hermes, Rudra, and Jack

-Immediately ran in and joined Zerofuku, hugging the both of you, crying loudly, “You’re okay!!” you couldn’t help but giggle, as he knew you were okay if you were making dark jokes like this, like normal. Seeing both of them crying crocodile tears, which did make you think of your old boss, Crocodile, crying, which was rather amusing to think about, you did try to calm them down, “You’re going to give yourself puffy eyes and cheeks- you’ll look just a like a couple of squirrels.” They both sniffled in unison, which you did think was adorable, a giggle rising out of you as you hugged them to you, happy that you won- you had them both in your arms again.

            -Loki, Buddha, Nikola, Ares, and Hercules

[mlmvoreconfessionals]

How about some more Master Chief?

Yeah, I’d love to do more with him! This game was a huge part of my childhood and I can't believe there's as little of him for vore as there is. Not that I blame people for focusing on the aliens more...but still! A crying shame.

When the M.aster Chief himself came stomping in, the soldiers thought they were saved. The entire human army has heard the stories about this man, how he's single-handed wiped out entire C.ovenent fleets and saved their asses more than once. So with them holed up in a safe room after getting overwhelmed, they thought it was finally safe to leave and get back home! But then...the chief locks the door behind him and stomps up to the first soldier. "Sorry about this. Just know that you'll all be given the highest awards you can for your sacrifice."

One hand is all it takes for the super soldier to lift the smaller man off the ground. His visor opens just enough to expose an open maw, which the soldier finds himself being crammed into, helmet and all. He's too stunned to resist, completely frozen in those strong hands as he's expertly devoured in just three massive gulps. M.aster Chief's armor stretches out with a creak now that an entire person is packed away inside. He pats his stomach once and lets out a belch before grabbing the next.

The remaining soldiers start to panic, the one in his grip yelling and struggling as he's shoveled into the soldier's jaws next. He thrashes around but all it does is save him seconds as he's slurped down just as fast as the first: three massive gulps, sucking him in to his waist, then ankles, then packing him away. The chief's armored gut stretches out further with a wet gurgle.

The next one tries to fight back, hoping that his empty pistol pointed right at the soldier will deter him...it doesn't. The gun is tossed aside fast and M.aster Chief hoists him up by the armpit, ignoring the loud curses of the solider as he's lowered in feet first. Gulp...gulp...gulp! The cursing stops, the solider's voice unable to get through the thick muscles and thicker armor as he becomes another notch in the chief's gut.

The last solider is cowering in the corner, staring up at M.aster Chief with wide eyes as the super solider looms over him. "Y-You can't do this to us, man!" the soldier demands. "You're on our side, aren't you?! We're people like you, dammit!"

"No...you're not like me." With one hand, M.aster Chief lifts the final soldier up. "You were trained for this war...but I was built for it. And part of that build requires a lot of energy. The kind I can't get anywhere else. This is your real job."

The realization makes the soldier go still as he's brought into that drooling maw. He's not a soldier sent out to help in the war...he's just fodder meant to keep the real weapon running smoothly. He doesn't squirm at all, even when he drops into the groaning stomach with his comrades. This was always going to be their fate.

M.aster Chief pats his stomach slowly as he feels the last soldier drop inside. He's in a bit of a rush, though, so there's no time to let them stew. All it takes is one flex of his stomach to snuff them all out, screams and crunches and snaps all ringing out in unison as the super soldier's bloated stomach rapidly decreases in size. A massive belch roars out of him, a couple cracked helmets flying out of his jaws and bouncing off the walls of the room. They're dripping in drool, but anyone who might find them would suspect that the enemy had gotten a hold of them. No one would ever realize that the greatest number of human casualties in this war was M.aster Chief's stomach.

The super soldier steps out of the room, reloading his gun as he stomps off, his body tingling with energy. He had a war to end...and war required sacrifices.

[potentialguybodyswaps]

HBO Titians Superboy and Beast Boy Bodyswap part 1

“Dam superboy really is shredded huh” I said to myself feeling my stolen chest… well not really stolen but more like forcibly given…

See after superboy and lex Luther had been

poisoned by this witch (lex Luther was already dead by the time superboy fell ill) the titians had me morph into a virus so I could enter his blood and try to fight off that of something there was no cure for. It had to be me, I was the only chance to do anything medically for superboy on the inside, I mean after all he was the son of Superman, the man of steel. nothing we have would be able to cut into his skin, and if we use kryptinite to soften him up, the magical poison could have just spread faster resulting in his death

The team was worried that if I became an organism that small I might not be able to get out of his blood stream or if I lost control and changed sizes inside of him, it’d kill us both.

But what choice did I have, do nothing and let superboy die? Or risk both our lives to save him? Well I wasn’t gonna let one of my best friends die, so I shrunk down into a tube, and let them inject me though his airway (basically like a nasal spray)

Once inside of him I made my way around microscopically for hours, destroying bit by bit of the poison untill I got the signal that he would be fine

Now getting back out was a bit tricky, even if they could tell exactly where I was in his body and inject a needle to pull me out, there would be no needle…… they kind of have a habit of liking to break in half when you try to insert them inside of someone that’s as hard as steel…

So I decided best course of action is to go out the way I came in, though the lungs, once in the lungs I morphed into a fly, his immune system didn’t exactly like that, or maybe I just ticked his lungs haha, cause I was immediately blown out with the force of a hurricane, lucky I didn’t go splat hitting, well any object on the way out… to be fair the moment I saw light (despite me flying at hundreds of miles an hour, out his system in a split second) I started to remorph into myself, so they probs helped with not going splat, when I hit the floor.

“Gar, are you ok?” Asked knightwing (our team leader)

“Yay, just hurt a bit after getting blown out going Mach Jesus” I said weakly

“ well thanks to you, superboy is gonna be fine, we’re glad we didn’t lose ether of you, we had our doubts, but you did it, you saved the day gar, go get some rest, you’ve earned it” knightwing said patting me on the shoulder

“Ow that hurts dick” I said wincing

“Okay well goodnight gang ima go sleep for like 12 hours, come get me when we have a mission/ ready to hunt down that witch again” I said already half asleep dragging myself along the walks to my room and bed

That night I had some of the weirdest dreams, I dreamed that I was superboy, but I knew that I was me still on the inside, but I couldn’t control my transformations, like I’d focus on transforming and it was like I could just feel time slow down, nothing would happen

I woke up 10 hours after I saved superboy, I was in my bed and I could feel the torn clothes around “oh no, I must have been sleep transforming again” I thought to myself

“Am I still transformed? I feel bigger, and full of energy, and this is coming from the guy that everyone clearly knows has adhd, and spends most of his time as a lion or other big enemies helping take down the bad guys” I thought to myself

I swung myself around to sit up on my bad, and opened my eyes to look at myself, “nope still human” I thought to myself “that’s good”

I yawned as I got up and started stretching. but i could still feel the breeze from tearing my clothing in my sleep

I opened my eyes again and looked down just to scream

“Ahhhhhh why am I so big, I’m not even green, so this definitely isn’t a animal transformation” I said trying to remain calm

I ran to the mirror but was there in less than a micro second, “what the fuck” I said catching myself on the sink careful not to break it with my impact

I looked up into the mirror and lost it, “i-I-im superboy” I said feeling my face

“Oh man this is so crazy, I have to go tell dick, or even raven, she’d know what to do, this must be a side effect of the magic that was in his blood or something

Oh man, it’s gonna be weird having 2 super boy’s on the team “ I said still checking myself out in the mirror

So far I’ve been very careful not to look at superboy’s dick but if I’m stuck looking like him, I mean it’s only a matter of time right?

I decided before I go confront the team, I guess I should go shower first, typically when I have dreams like these where I transform in them, I kinda sweat a lot…

I stepped into the shower and started washing my hair, and eventually the time came to scrub my body.

I looked down and gasped, “dude, I know superboy is a clone but what possible need could superboy need a super dick for, like this thing is huge” I thought to myself as I began stroking it

Unfortunately for me, and superboy I guess, it doesn’t feel as good as it did when I was still me, I was probably stroking it for close to 40 minutes before I was even close to cumming, “dam” I thought to myself “if it takes me this long to even get close to cumming, superboy could probably fuck someone to death”

After that thought I started laughing to myself, “ man besides the whole lack of sensitivity down there, this might not be to bad of a problem, I mean after all who wouldn’t wanna fuck superboy right?”

At that point starfire came running into the bathroom yelling my name “Beast boy, I know your probably wanting to get acquainted with your new body but nows not the time”

“What do you mean” I said “I’m super boy”

“ no your not, super boy is in your body that’s still in the medical room, we’ve already cleared him for combat, come on I know it’s you gar, we gotta go, we got a new lead on that witch, she’ll have the answers to how this happened”

“B-b-but star are you sure, like I haven’t even had this body for like 2 hours yet, I don’t know how to use his powers” I said with a look of confusion

“Funny, superboy said the same thing… Just punch hard, come on we gotta go NOW gar.”

#edit this post originally had nudity in it of some guy that looked like the superboy actor but tumblr blocked it…

Guess a more explicit version will have to wait till I make a patreon haha

200 followers and I’ll start making explicit versions on patreon ?

[goawaypopup]

Roddacember Day 18: Ripples

(A remastered rant from the depths of the Deltora Quest Discord server.)

There is a timeline out there where the quest failed because Queen Bee murdered the questers to death in her yard with her bees before they could explain.

She is a contact of the Resistance. Finding the Belt on Lief's body, complete with three gems in place, she'd pretty well know what was up. She doesn't strike me as the sort to cast off the task to anyone else, especially not with the burden of guilt for it.

The next-in-line is dead, but the resistance doesn't know that. The Belt has done what it never did in the series, swapping over to the next in line - Marilen? Or can it be anybody who shares Adin's line? Or does Marilen count as dead because she's currently a spooky ghost in the Valley of the Lost? Who knows. The resistance can figure that out and have their own Dain reveal on their own schedule after the Belt's complete.

The bees are very intelligent and very fast. They can follow directions and travel quickly and discreetly. Queen Bee may be more fragile than the previous heroes, but she doesn't even need to be there to get the last four gems. Luckily, Lief had a handy map to them too.

The Maze of the Beast would be pretty difficult to pull off, and might require some sort of human party. The hatch could be lifted by a human to let the bees in to search, and the Glus might not even sense them, let alone be able to take them out with its spit. If they could just have a way to actually locate the Amethyst, the stone is soft enough that they very well might be able to bore through it. There is a species of bee that does this with cliffsides!

The problem of finding it might call for some creative solutions. I guess there's no reason not to send a pack of bees down carrying the Belt? If they could lift Steven's cart they can certainly pull that off. Or, for a more fun route, capture a bunch of Grey Guards, tell them you'll pull them back up if they can find the Amethyst, and dump them in the Maze. Grey Guards are very self-serving, it'd work great. Probably fill the Glus up after a pod or two and leave the rest to tear the place up.

Gellick would probably require a strategy to actually kill him. The treasure cavern must have an opening to the air for him to breathe somewhere, and he probably can't spit poison quickly enough to take down an entire swarm of flying insects, but they couldn't really try to tear the gem from his forehead. He's probably at least somewhat poison-coated there, and no doubt he can reach there with his tongue.

Dreaming Spring water might work again here if Queen Bee learned of it, but my thought here is bees carrying Water Eaters - they're locally made, an easy size for a bee to carry, and will definitely cause immediate massive internal damage. And Lief could hold the emerald immediately after Gellick's death, suggesting bees could also.

The Shifting Sands are a bit of an unknown. They took a while to notice Lief, but the buzzing of a rival hive seems to me like something that would set them on guard immediately. And they're uniquely capable of wiping out swarms of small intruders.

I'm not entirely sure what would work best here - fortunately the bees are capable of trying multiple times. Perhaps the best strategy would simply be getting in and out as fast as possible, or doing a stealthy remove and replace like in the original, or something fun like dropping an entire carriage into the pyramid and escaping in the chaos.

There's also the opal's foresight to help out here, which I'm certain Queen Bee would be the sort to use frequently; being a Plains woman, and also just, the way she is.

I was going to delve into the plausibility of bees being able to open doors, but then I remembered the Valley of the Lost's animal-killing mist. That's pretty insurmountable. But this one is something that doesn't have an immediate physical risk.

We're finally going to have to send in the Resistance!

Doom did manage the test before, and even if he probably can't just play again, he can definitely tell others the answer. The question is whether he can be persuaded to help. To round off the theme, I'll propose bee torture for this.

And with that, we have a more or less clear path to Queen Bee of Deltora.

[sizebrained]

Unstuck Together: Ben's Perspective, Pt 1

How Ben the Human found Hazel the Borrower.

Content Warning: Adult themes and language, some gruesome details w slight gore related to a car crash. Fear, death, danger, terror, therapy, injury, panic attacks, and first meetings.

***

Ben rested his forehead against the back of a forearm watching the popcorn bag turning in the microwave. It was 3 in the morning. The nightmares were brutal.

He was watching a marathon of very bad horror movies on tv. His guess was that they were all the cheapest option for the channel.

He didn’t like horror movies, but he scrolled through different apps for a while trying to pick something. The problem was that all of the modern stuff actually looked scary.

He couldn’t even get through the trailer of the most recent Evil Dead movie without thinking he was going to have a heart attack.

Ben didn’t want to watch something actually scary. His therapist said he needed to try and expose himself in a controlled environment. It was his suggestion to try somewhat scary movies. He told Ben that he could always pause it, but the loud noises and terror would start to reduce his body’s new hypersensitive response.

The bad cable options seemed like a good compromise, but so far they were ridiculous or clearly fake rather than scary. They did at least have some loud noises every once in a while.

He waited for the popcorn to finish, the crutch digging into his armpit. It was so uncomfortable, and he shifted trying to make it less painful. Thankfully it was his last round of being in a cast after months of procedures, recovery, and bandages.

The microwave dinged and he pulled out the hot bag. He hobbled back to his couch. He sat down with a heavy thud and put his cast back on the coffee table pillow to keep it elevated.

He unpaused the movie, opening the bag to refill his large steel bowl. Someone opened a door in the movie and screamed but Ben hadn’t been watching. It made him jump in his seat and he sent the bowl flying. Popcorn was everywhere.

“FUCK!” He yelled out feeling his heart racing. He turned off the tv and felt his heart thumping in his ears. He forced himself to take slow heavy breaths, nodding his head to keep time like his therapist had taught him.

After a few moments, the heartbeat between his ears had subsided. He sighed looking at popcorn everywhere.

He had just moved into the luxury condo two weeks ago. Before he could actually get a tour he had to suffer the realtor and the annoying first 5 minutes he suffered at the start of every conversation.

“Oh my! You’re reaaalllllly TALL!!!” the realtor said as if she were the first person to notice, the 5 minute clock had started. Basketball came up next.

He was only in his 2nd year of college, but after a horrific car accident early in the season his career was over. Thankfully, the lawsuit settlement covered his needs and more. He thought the condo would make a good place to try and recover with a change of scenery and “luxury.” He could use it.

Back in the late night of solo living in his condo, Ben surveyed the mess in his sparse new living room. He hoisted himself up onto one crutch with a sigh, loudly making his way out of his apartment over to the janitor’s closet.

The building’s janitor left it unlocked for him after Ben had explained he just moved in and didn’t have a vacuum or anything.

Ben was the only one on his floor, and he was glad for it now because of how noisily he moved. Ben reached the closet and opened the door. The ceiling light turned on automatically. He bent down so his head didn’t crack into the door frame.

Being almost 7 feet tall, he always bent down at doorways. Someone his size only needed to make that mistake once or twice before they made a lifelong habit of crouching.

Ben reached into the corner to grab the vacuum and go clean up his mess when he heard a sound. He turned his head to the side looking around to try and see where it came from.

Ben heard it again. It was quiet and faint, but he swore he heard a very soft voice say “HELP"

He blinked and held his breath to listen. His mind was racing with possibilities. Was he actually, finally asleep? Had the stress of everything finally made him lose his mind? Was it his pain meds? He hadn't taken any today he remembered.

Then Ben very clearly heard the voice say “Down here.” There was a pause and then “Please. Help.”

This time he noticed something about the voice. It wasn’t just soft, but he could swear it sounded British.

Ben looked behind him into the hallway. It was empty. Then he looked at the floor. He didn’t believe what he was seeing. He must have been mistaken. Or he really was losing his mind and he was in trouble if they found a straight jacket big enough for him.

Under the bottom shelf of the storage closet, Ben saw two very, very small boots. They were lying flat with the toes pointed up towards the ceiling. The tiny boots were on top of a sheet that Ben recognized as a glue trap.

“Please...” the voice said again. It sounded like whoever owned the voice had been crying and was exhausted. “I can’t…I can’t move.”

***

End Part 1

[woodenplank-gt]

Check-Up

2K words

Sage and Arthur dug into their food while Cade only had a few bites of egg and bacon before getting up to take his medicine and feed the dog. Even though Arthur clearly disapproved of Cade abandoning his breakfast, Sage was silently grateful. It was already hard enough sitting near one giant human eating bites of food as big as she was, she couldn't imagine two.

Her prey instincts kept trying to kick in and get her out of there, but she stubbornly ignored it and kept her eyes on her berry. She hadn't realized how hungry she was until she tore through the skin of the berry that morning. The last couple of days had clearly taken a toll on her.

The older human quietly sat back down in his chair and Tukka eventually took his spot under the table again, wanting to be close to his new fairy friend.

Cade sat patiently and let Sage finish eating before speaking up."You seem to be doing a lot better today." He commented.

She shifted uncomfortably and looked down at the table, still uneasy under the attention of humans. "Yeah my leg isn't hurting as much," she replied. "And having some rest and food also helps," Sage added hoping it made her sound better than she was. In all honesty, she could easily sleep the entire day away. It felt like the energy in her body was constantly leaking out no matter how much rest she got. Sage figured she can actually recover once she gets back home and under the care of medics the same size as her.

The older human nodded "may I?" He asked, indicating her bandaged leg. When she gave him a small nod he reached down and grabbed the med kit he left on the floor by the table. Cade clicked open the locks and began pulling out the magnifier, disinfectant cream, and gauze.

She took a quick sip of water before placing the cap onto a napkin nearby. Sage carefully straightened out her leg and watched with bated breath as two humongous hands began reaching towards her. She resisted the urge to back away as large fingers gently lifted her leg and unwrapped the thick gauze. Cade leaned down with the magnifier until his face was inches from Sage, his brown eyes intently scrutinizing the wound. Instead of closing her eyes like a scared child she bravely met the gaze of the giant as he worked.

She could see every detail in the older human's face like this; small freckles dotting his nose and cheeks, wrinkles in the corners of his eyes, and a faint scar nearly covered by his beard. She looked into the large brown orbs right above her and noticed how tired they always seemed to appear no matter how often he tried to blink the sleep away. The dark bags under his eyes definitely didn't help the human look more alive.

On the other hand, Cade was far more focused on limiting his movements as he examined a leg that easily rested on his fingertip. His brows furrowed in confusion as he looked closer. Her leg was nearly healed as if she had been recovering for weeks instead of getting impaled yesterday. Cade has seen his fair share of impalements while taking calls, ranging from knives to a stop sign. But none of them ever healed this quickly. He'd never seen anything like it.

"Is everything alright?" Sage asked, noticing the puzzled look on the large face in front of her.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by the concerned voice. "Everything looks fine," he assured his tiny patient and leaned back. He didn't want to make a big deal over something he wasn't entirely sure about. Her leg could have just looked worse than it actually was.

Cade promptly reapplied some cream on her wound to clean it and carefully wrapped it in a brand new bandage. Since the bandage was very thick compared to the tiny fairy, he decided to use a bit less this time since her leg was no longer bleeding and the hole was almost closed up. It would definitely make getting around a lot easier for Sage since she was still unable to fly.

Speaking of flying,"Can I see your wings now?" Cade asked as Sage removed her leg from his finger.

Right when those words reached her ears, she gave wary glances to the hands still nearby as if they were about to suddenly pounce on her. Her own hand quickly reached for her hip but grabbed onto nothing. Cade could only assume she was trying to reach for the sword he confiscated earlier. He was glad he took that thing away from her when he did, that sword looked like it could cause serious damage to his fingers.

Seeing the intense look on her little face made his heart drop and he slowly moved his hands away from her. He didn't know how Sage got injured but Cade doubted she let her wings get torn on accident with how much care she showed them. The stick he found lodged in her leg reinforced his theory that she was attacked by something. If her wings were intentionally targeted so she was stuck on the ground with whoever wanted to hurt her, then that would definitely leave behind some sort of trauma.

He couldn't blame her for wanting to keep her wings out of other hands (or fingers). Cade knew all too well how one event can rewire a persons instincts.

He gave Sage his most sincere look. "I just need to see how they're healing. I won't touch them." Her eyes nervously glanced between his face and hands,"I promise I won't do anything you don't want me to," Cade swore in a low yet comforting voice.

Arthur, who had been watching quietly from the side, chimed in. "Yeah and if he tries anything I'll hit him for you," he said with a wink.

Sage hardly noticed the annoyed look Cade gave his younger brother for the joke as her thoughts took over.

Letting someone, especially a human, examine her wings went against every instinct in her body. Even Rod never touched her wings after years and years of being friends. It wasn't like she was afraid or over protective of them, it just didn't feel... right. Like they were a treasure she had to keep out of reach without ever knowing why.

A treasure she failed to protect yesterday.

Just thinking about the brief moment when the sprite had her wings in hand and under an axe sent shivers down Sage's spine. She never thought of how helpless she would be without her wings. Flying had always been something she'd taken for granted. They were what she was known for. The fairy commander that can zip through the trees faster than any bird. When it came to air combat, no one stood a chance against her. Her wings made her unstoppable.

Now she knew how fragile her wings are and how useless she is without her ability to fly.

Cade said he could help fix them. She would be flying in no time if she just let him look. Thats all he was going to do. Just look. No touching.

Without a word, Sage rose to her feet and faced her back towards the humans, keeping herself as calm and collected as she could. She stayed silent and waited for the human to make the next move.

The movement on the table caught both brother's attention and they exchanged a quick look with each other. Arthur gave Cade a confident nod, understanding how tedious treating a tiny can be. Cade sat there for another moment before approaching Sage once again.

Muttering a quick warning, he leaned forward until he could see her wings through the magnifying glass. He noticed the woman's wings shiver as he got closer but Sage gave no indication that it was painful, so he stayed quiet.

Cade was worried the yellow rod stabilizing her wing got loose after Sage fell on the chair from yesterday's failed escape attempt, but it was still perfectly in place. The huge tear running from the tip of her wing down to the center was still there, but some of the smaller cracks disappeared. Like they miraculously healed. Just like her leg.

If he remembered the crash course he took on sprite wings correctly (and if fairy wings were similar), then it wasn't possible for wings to heal that quickly. It normally took at least a week for the smaller cracks to close. But he knew close to nothing about the autonomy of the fae or their wings, which was a huge problem if he wanted to help Sage.

Cade leaned away to give her some space. "Sage" he began,"do you have any sort of...healing abilities?" It felt weird to ask that sort of question, but he knew it could be possible. Sprites have the ability to control plants due to their connection to nature, so a fairy being able to heal wasn't too far fetched. Plus Cade had no other explanation for her quick healing. It definitely wasn't the over-the-counter ointment and gauze he used.

It took a few moments for Sage to realize the hot breath blowing against her back disappeared. She rolled her shoulders to try and get rid of the sensation and turned back around to face the humans.

Cade's black shirt alone created a wall of fabric that blocked her view of the rest of the kitchen. She slowly took a few steps back so she didn't have to look straight up. Seeing this, both brothers hunched down a little to make it easier on her. Although they still loomed over her head.

Trying her best to ignore that, she shrugged her shoulders. "I'm not sure. I've never been seriously injured before, only scratches and bruises."

"Huh," Cade mumbled quietly. He rubbed his unkept beard with a hand, deep in thought.

Arthur scooted closer to the table now that the medical stuff was over. "Well do you know about any other fairies getting hurt and healing quickly?" He asked.

"No, I don't exactly live with any other fae." She said quietly. Her unstabilized wing drooped slightly at the reminder. She wished she could remember something from her childhood with her kind. A piece of their traditions and food and beliefs, but only black smoke and fire fill her mind every time she thought that far back. The fae were just as much a mystery to her as they were to everyone else. Sometimes she felt like she couldn't even call herself a fairy with how foreign her kind were to her.

Arthur's blue eyes filled with pure understanding. Any intimidation and annoyance she felt with the younger human melted away and was replaced with a comforting presence. "I'm sorry to hear that, it must be tough being on your own like that," he said sincerely.

Tukka seemed to sense the drop of sadness in the air and poked his head up from under the table. His eyes could just be seen above the edge of the table as he checked on his tiny friend. He gave a soft whimper as if asking if she was alright, and Sage gave him a small wave. He stared at her for a few more seconds then went back to his spot under the table when he was certain she was okay.

Sage nodded her thanks to Arthur then looked back up at Cade, searching for a change in the subject. His eyes were distant and he gave no indication of hearing the conversation in front of him.

"Umm.... Cade?" She asked trying to get his attention, but her soft voice didn't reach his ears.

Arthur reached over and gave him a light tap on the shoulder. Cade visibly jumped and quickly looked around the room before settling back down in his chair as if nothing happened. He ran a hand through his brown hair and leaned back.

Arthur chose to ignore his brother's reaction. "Why did you ask about Sage having healing abilities?"

Cade pinched the bridge of his nose as he remembered their conversation. "Her leg and wing is healing faster than I thought they would, that's all." He said casually. He glanced back down and gave Sage a small smile,"Your leg should be healed by the time this blizzard ends. I'm not entirely sure about your wing though." He slowly pushed himself up from his chair,"Everything will heal eventually," he assured her.

"Where do you think you're going so soon?" Arthur asked as Cade stepped away from the table and towards the hallway leading to his room. His breakfast looked nearly untouched as he turned away.

Cade waved a tired hand in the air,"Relax, im not going to sleep or anything. I'm just gonna look into some things and make some calls." He said as he trudged along.

"Come on Cade," Arthur complained,"Hang out with me and Sage. We're gonna play games and watch stuff and have some fun." He crossed his arms confidently, "Isn't that right Sage?"

"Wai- huh?" She stammered out in shock. She definitely didn't want to have any more human interactions if she could help it.

Sage was about to turn Arthur down when she turned towards him and met his silent, pleading gaze. It was clear there was more to this than what met the eye, although Sage wasn't sure why Arthur needed Cade to stay with them. I can't believe I'm doing this, she thought to herself.

She spoke up so Cade could hear her as he walked away,"Yeah Arthur and I are gonna have soooooo much fun! You'll miss out!" She teased as if she were talking to one of the kids back in The Hollow and not a grown human.

When Cade didn't turn around, Arthur continued."Fine, but you can't spend the whole day locked in your room. It's not healthy. We better see you again." He demanded.

When the faint sound of a door closing down the hall could be heard, Arthur slumped back in his seat with a look of defeat. His right hand rested on the table and idly fidgeted with a napkin.

Sage stood awkwardly on the middle of the table. She was tempted to hide away in her box home to get out of sight from the human. But one look at Arthur and she knew she couldn't leave him too.

She slowly walked over to the hand resting on the table, finding her ability to walk a lot better now that her leg has significantly healed. She patted her hand on Arthur's knuckle and it was his turn to look at her in surprise.

Sage stubbornly ignored how his hand alone was bigger and far more powerful than she'll ever be. Arthur held himself completely still with her so close to him, making Sage confident in giving him her trust.

She grinned,"What do you want to do first?"

[ichorblossoms]

for the ask meme can i get uhhhh yarrow + face, serena + motion, grimm + favorite

HI HELLO JANE!!!!! sorry this took awhile to get around to answering i wrote all the text and told myself i was gonna draw pictures for these and then i got distracted because i wanted to draw. other pictures instead :,D BUT without further ado !!

face: Describe your OC's face. What's their smile like? Are their orbs cerulean? What would someone notice first when looking at them?

i don't trust my writing skills enough to write a description. their face:

i talked a little bit abt their facial features in this ask, but yeah, the Bee Stuff is definitely what people notice first. yarrow's modification was an experimental one, so while most people are kinda used to seeing humods with fur on their faces or weird ears or maybe horns and whatnot, invertebrate features are rare and jarring. this does cause issues when you're trying to be discreet, so yarrow tries their best to wear bandanas or masks. even pre-modification they actually wear something to the effect of a bandana or surgical mask often; partially because They Are A Doctor and also because they live in a mining town that doesn't give a shit about how much dust is kicked up from the open-pit mining

pre-modification i'm not sure what people would notice first; they have a few small defining features like their dimples, yellow-gold eyes, straight teeth, patchy facial hair, and mole on their right cheek, but overall nothing out of the ordinary. i think it's less features people notice, and a general impression of openess? he's quick to smile, talkative, and expressive, so people usually feel like they can approach him

motion: How does your OC move? How does their clothing help or hinder their range of motion? Are they flexible, coordinated, clumsy?

having trained in martial arts for most of her life, serena's very coordinated and flexible! she also has a muscular stature and she can make herself very difficult to move if she doesn't want to. she's aware of her size and generally has a slouch to her posture and walks with a bit of a trudge and lope if that makes sense? she has enough control though to where she can move almost freakishly quiet and it scares people on occasion

ofc she doesn't wear clothes, but she does have her prosthesis!

she's got both an everyday and a sport prosthesis, so while her movement isn't necessarily affected by that, she's less willing to run or do anything intense if she just has her everyday prosthesis on (that's the one i draw, i need to look more into sport prostheses for humans and adapt a design from there)

bc she's a congenital amputee, the only real adjustment she's had to do irt her leg is adapting to a new prosthesis every few years, so she has a solid sense of moving with or without it on. i've been trying to determine if she has smthin like an adapted wheelchair as well, but since dragons are quadrupeds and she's only missing part of a limb, it may not be necessary when she also has her tail and wings to help counterbalance during movement...? there's also the factor that she doesn't have a lot of money, so regardless of what she has to assist her, it's not always top-quality and she's learned to live with a certain level of discomfort and pain

speaking of wings, flying is something dragons can do, but it's a lot like running where most ppl can't do it for longer periods of time unless they train. it's not as necessary in modern society, so most dragons can fly for short bursts if needed/for fun. with the exception of a few who do things like, idk fly to work, most rely on transit bc it's easier. serena's ability to fly is Okay, she's accumulated some damage to her wings over the years (side effect of martial arts where other people have claws and horns), which makes her less aerodynamic and more easily tired out. she's got a good handle on her body and how it moves, so she's actually pretty graceful in the air and not aware of that fact at all. overall, she prefers not to fly, but still maintains a healthy habit of working out those muscles so they don't atrophy, which is a thing that happens with modern dragons.

favorite: Does your OC have a favorite article of clothing or accessory? What is it? What's the meaning behind it? Do they wear it all the time or do they wear it sparingly to keep it safe?

am i allowed to saw wrench here. i'm gonna say wrench

saying wrench is grimm's favorite accessory is actually a stretch bc it loathes wearing it, but adores wrench as a companion but if we are purely talking abt clothing here, grimm's not the sentimental sort, so it doesn't hold on to things once they're to worn nor does it worry about wearing things out. which is the boring answer

wrench is only worn as armor a handful of times in-story and in dire circumstances (that i. have not quite figured out yet <3). grimm fucking hates wearing it, hates the way it takes them back to their past, hates the way it doesn't quite fit their body anymore and hurts if they wear it too long, hates why they even have to wear it, but it's protection and a weapon in one, and they don't have many options.

i talked abt wrench a little bit when you asked abt it here, but wrench is both an artifact of grimm's past and a dear friend. as an animal companion/robot grimm does maintain wrench to an extent and it's a good dog that doesn't age like normal animals, they have a close pet/owner bond. when it comes to "wearing" it, transforming (so to speak) doesn't cause any wear and tear on wrench itself, since that is one of the purposes it was built for, but the situations in which grimm would don wrench may result in damage and there's also an element of wanting to keep wrench safe. aside from being armor, wrench can also do stuff like jam signals for short periods of time and sense heat signatures, so it does have an interest in preserving wrench for its own work and safety as well, but it's also a pet, yknow?

post-story i'm p sure grimm and yarrow would get something equivalent to married. yarrow's the romantic and the one to suggest it ofc, but grimm's like "hell, if i'm going to symbolically tie their life to someone else's it wouldn't be anyone but yarrow" and whatever sort of wedding band/necklace/wearable symbol they choose would become grimm's favorite, esp since it represents a version of themself they like being

[anarchy-and-piglins]

Random bird facts! (Mostly about birds from my country cause that's all I really know but they're really weird birds here so you get some neat facts!) . My country's airforce mascot is the Kiwi bird. A very well known, FLIGHTLESS bird. Which I will never not find funny. . When we were trying (and failing) to do a flag design referendum, one of the actual flags proposed was a clip art and ms paint rendition of a Kiwi bird with laser beams being shot out of its eyes. Sadly, that option did not make it to the final voting stage. But it got close. . Kiwi birds lay a single egg that is roughly about 2/3rds of its total body mass. The thing is MASSIVE for it's size! How it doesn't kill the bird is still a mystery. . Kiwi bird feathers are very similar to fur, they have WHISKERS, they take up the same evolutionary niche of most rodents, and their nostrils are at the tip of their beak rather than the base like most other birds. The point of the nostrils being there is to help them sniff out little grubs and fruits in the leaf litter on the forest floor, but it also has proven useful during floods as they will simply flip their beak up like a snorkle and bob their way to dry ground. They're not great at swimming but they are great at floating. . Kiwi birds are nocturnal and watching them play on trail cams and nightvision cams is incredibly entertaining, they are so goofy, highly recommend. . Most of my country's birds are flightless as the islands they live on were mostly predator free until the introduction of humans. Due to the isolation, they all ended up evolving to take up a lot of evolutionary niches that would normally be filled by other animals. We have birds that are very similar to rodents and we used to have bird that took up the grazing/hunting niche that looked like massive ostriches called Moas, they most likely hunted smaller birds and grazed on ferns and grasses, and the only thing that dared to hunt them before humans was a giant fuck off eagle that was known as the largest eagle in earth's history called the Haast eagle. Sadly they both went extinct but we still have viable dna stored in labs so....could possibly bring them back? Maybe? Not sure if that's a good idea as they probably wouldn't do well with humans.

. We have the world's only alpine parrot! The Kea! They're our equivalent to crows as they are just as intelligent, but like if a crow had a knife and knew how to use it cause Keas have massive beaks and no fear of humans and have been recorded tearing open CARS to get inside because they saw something they wanted. Tourists are often told to NOT feed the Keas and keep all shiny objects and food hidden in the trunk of the car so the Keas won't see it through the windshield because they CAN and WILL destroy your car/purse/vehicle/bags/etc... to get what they want. They are not actively malicious btw, they're just like toddlers with inhuman strength and no sense of boundaries. They're very curious and playful, again they're very similar to crows and ravens, and they love playing in the snow! . We also have Kaka's, the Keas slightly more shy and better behaved cousin. Only slightly though. I got bit by one who saw I hid a bag of chips in my backpack and it landed on me to try and undo the sipper on it so I wrapped my arms around the bag to hold it shut and it literally looked at me and slowly pinched my arm with it's beak while staring at me like "open the bag, OPEN THE BAG! I want treats!!! How dare!" Didn't break skin but still, little guy was basically threatening to eat me if I didn't give my chips.

. Kakapo are our super endangered flightless parrots that look like fuzzy green melons I swear. There's been attempts to try and get them repopulated but unfortunately, unlike the Kea and Kaka, Kakapo are very....stupid when it comes to reproducing and I will not say more.

. We have giant fucking pigeons called Kereru and they are notoriously bad at flying to the point there are warning signs on roads near where they live that warn drivers of them potentially falling out of the sky.

. The majority of our birds are named after Pokemon naming conventions! As in Pokemon are named after the sound they make, and our birds are too! If you listen to their songs or the sounds they make (such as with the Kereru, it's mostly quiet but it has a whistle feather that makes a sound when it flies which is the sound it's named for) they sound very similar to their names! I think it's cool!

. We have burrowing penguins.

OH THESE ARE WONDERFUL!

I actually knew quite a bit about the Kiwi bird because I did a presentation on them in middle school for some reason (we all had to pick an animal and I was a weird kid I guess) but I love the bird facts :D thank you!

[everythingbutresolved]

The Worst Haim Fic Ever

Fictional!Hamish Linklater x f!reader

Rating: Horny Teenager

Summary: Let's break the writing dry spell with something so bad it will self destruct when you have finished reading it shall we?

Warnings: Grammar? What is it? Abuse of Zeta Gen talk. Reader is a a hamfam mutual and Haim has several nicknames, gratuitous descriptions of the male body, unprotected sex, moron dirty talk.

Notes: Thank you so much for the love in the past year, I'm trying to love back and be more productive, I just wanted to share the silliest thing that popped in my mind...enjoy 😜

ur sitting at home in ur pjs all comfy with half edible left from the tray you baked for the weekend.

Ur dog and you are watching netflix eating only red m&m’s talking to the friendz in your phone when u hear a knock at ur door. u get up and spill all the candies on the floor but don’t worry cuz u already gulped down all the red and yellow choco, but carry your puppy with u because you didnt order anything from amazong in like 3 days so your four legged friend might have to scare an intruder. u open the door and it’s the hottest man ever

 Hummus Longlater

u almost drop on your butt bcz you were just talking to your mutuals in barks and meows how much u need to climb that human palmtree covered in chocolate fudge. U say “Drop gorgeous Daddy Legend wtf ya doin here?” But that piece of licorice bats his eye hair so quickly u fall back on the couch while ur doggo goes and pack his toys cuz he's going with him.

“Hey babygirl” Hamosh sais, leaning on ur doorframe, revealing he is wearing nothing but a white vest two sizes down a toddler and the tightest jeans ever sold by those gud bois at Levi’s. A “Look I know I’m your bias and that I always munch on it, and finally my Zaddy whiskers r too drenched in fandom juice to keep ignoring them. The fire has spread and reached my cheeks missus.”

ur like “omg !! Im not wearing any makeup!! Or pants!! Oh skinny legend u’re so father, periodt!!!”  but he just lafs at that because tahts what he likes about u. “ya girl i know thats why im heer. I’m mad lit on god no god no cap. Drip drip. I heard u enjoy eating junk food and getting your junk food ate out. Do u wanna rip my pants and eat me up gurl? Leave no crumbs baby.”

And saying that he loafs in to your house, tripping over doggo when he refuses to hover his naked feet. “i like your trash panda” “don’t scratch him under his ear or he’ll hump ur leg till tomorrow” U say before smushing your face into his. He smells like old spice and tastes like pumpkin donut and matcha latte. You untangle your tongues only to ask “Hammac glorious, your foot is always on my neck daddy, but I have to ask, r u real or is the weed they sold me pretty fire?”

Ur pup gives you  stern look and plops on his furry ass and ur sure he says “human im petotaly serious don0t parse this or ill foist on you three gens of my litters – mine and the raccoon that lives under the porch”

Himbo grabs ur sweaty ass and says “The way u scratch ur armpits called me like a charm and i just had to come get a taste of this sweet sweet potato couch.” He stretches his vest over his head, his eyes are the color of the hazelnut frosted chocolate brownie you had this morning. “well? U got me like La-La-La baby, wanna sit on my face or what ?”“duh,” u spit, moving puppy aside. “I love you down Mr. H” His chest is smooth with baby oil when you slide ur hands on it. He has huge hands that scoop under ur ass and throw you on the bed and rip of your pjs. Ur android goes flying out the pocket, probsbly never to be seen again. U have the time to chant “You’r our beloved, and u have us in a chokehold!” then is on top of you fast, pinnning you to the bed, slopply groping under ur shirt for ur boobs that bounce boobily. He chokes u with his socks that smells like socks but u kinda think thats hot. His jeans sway to the floor and skitter away, leaving him in his boxers he got for christmas in 2003. His heft is huge, huger than his hands. It snaps the elastic and elicopter it for a ful minute until u’re hypnotized. “dont worry babygurl this will help u get it all in” he grabs ur legs and throws them over his shoulder and massages ur pussy until u scream and snatch his fingers up your coochie like the dyson ur mom gave u for xmas.

“omg Mr. H that was nom-nom delish how r u so good at pumpussy??!” you gasp gasplessly

“since I’m in my assembly period my strengths multiplied, now I can make u cum with just a flex of my massive eyebrows watch this” and with that he hoola-hoops his hairy caterpillars and makes u *O* a few more times “ r u ready baby gril?”

“yes Zaddy!” 

He likes that. He ate that up a compliment and had u GAG, while ur cunt eats it all up. U can see urself cumming in the reflex of his caramel pudding eyes. He moans so loud the neighbors think ur killing someone and get more popcorns. U scream obscenities and fuck and cum and fuck and cum all over the apartment. Ur doggo has found ur phone and is taking a video to send ur besties later. The couch rols over from so much fuckng and cumming. Hammamet keeps gong flexing his infinite thighs becuz yours gave up. He doesn't unload until the very end when he climbs on the bedframe and showers u singing Sweet Home Carolina. U almost drown.

“wow mr Hamigo thank u” u say. Talking makes cum gush off ur hair

“ur welcom. Btw I gotta go now.” He swishes in his jeans like a well grased seal and moves to ur side of the bed. U start crying for the sudden loss of his massive cock. “Hamandbacon I thought you were different but ur like everyone else, mid.”

He looks into ur eyes and lovingly swipes some cum from your face.

“I don’t get it. I just gave u the best camping of ur life”

“And now ur fleeing”  

He lafs u off “I have 47 more friendly stops after this, don’t be greedy babgurl” U bat ur sticky palms with joy, meanwhile your familiar retrieves ur phone for U so you can give a head up to your mutuals – get ready with water and lube.

@littleredwritingcat this is for you bestie

Randy tag @supplanther @plainlo-inthemorning @girlwiththenegantattoo @agirlinherhead @madsmilfelsen @aherdofbees @chronic-ghost @ebiemidnightlibrarian @pegplunkett @jyngerpeach and more

[late-to-the-magnus-archives]

Just a Little Side-Quest, Part Three: GRIEF, a TMA x Malevolent series taking place in the Dark World

Egg storms. God-eating monsters. Mysterious machines. The Dark World responds to minds and hearts in a way no one can predict, and sometimes, even with a baby god on their side, harm still happens.

That doesn't mean it all has to be bad. Today, it starts bad, though. Boy, does it ever.

Just a Little Side-Quest: part three of A TMA x Malevolent crossover taking place in the Dark World. Spoilers for the entirety of TMA. Spoilers up to part 35 of Malevolent.

AO3

--------------

“Who is dreaming eggs?” Martin cried. He didn’t dodge quickly enough, and lukewarm horror splattered him from behind. “Oh, gross!”

“Keep moving, keep moving!” Jon shouted, dragging him with a fist around his denim suspender. “Arthur! Follow my voice!”

I can’t fucking see! John bellowed, because the first bomb had landed egg all over Arthur’s face.

“This way! This way!” Jon cried.

Arthur was good at following voice commands, and he kept up.

It had been like this for nearly an hour. The rising sun brought a storm of eggs. Huge eggs. Massive eggs. Eggs the size of lorries, splattering everything with sulfuric goo and sticky, gelatinous white, and the only thing there was to do was run.

They’re aiming for us, I swear!  

“No, she’s weeping!” Jon said, which made no sense to anybody. “Follow! This way! This way! It’s going… godsdamn it, that’s not east anymore, but it was, but it’s going that way , so we go this way!”

“East changes?” Martin’s voice cracked. Then he started spitting; some of it had gotten into his mouth.

“Keep going! ”

What else could they do?

Eggs hit with the power of grenades, denting the earth, shell-shrapnel flying. All three runners understood that they didn’t really have bodies, that they couldn’t die, that receiving injury made no sense—but they felt like they might be cut and bled, or brained by eggs, or choked in goo, and so they ran.

“Damn this place!” Arthur snarled.

“Here! Down here!” And Jon did the unthinkable: he abruptly darted right and into the Chasm.

Martin screamed. “Jon!”

“Right here!” Jon called, his hand waving above the sharpened edge. “Here! There’s a ledge!”

Why would a ledge in a hole help anyone? John bellowed, but Arthur was already scrambling down.

Martin made a small sound. He couldn’t see them. Jon’s hand seemed to be sticking up out of pure shadow.

Then so did Jon’s head. “Martin.” He reached. “Come to me.”

Martin met his eyes and did. He reached, and was pulled down.

#

The eggs did not penetrate. They did not even hit the Chasm. There had to be some horrible reason for that, but none of them had the mental space left to figure it out.

“I am so… sticky,” Arthur moaned.

John kept flexing the fingers on his left hand, breaking the strings of goo trying to dry between them. So… this is sort of like the Dreamlands.

“The what?” said Martin.

Dreamlands. It’s… fuck, it’s another world, apart from Earth’s universe.

“Interstitial,” said Jon, leaning against the rough Chasm wall, eyes closed. “An in-between place; the playground of gods and monsters. People who dream vividly can go there, and even make something of a life.”

“Right,” said Martin. “No idea how to respond to that.”

“I think I get what you’re saying, John,” said Jon. 

The Dreamlands are formed by the power of dreams, said John. Human minds and imagination shape it even more than the will of gods and monsters. They create reality there.

“Ephemerally,” Jon added.

Sure, but that’s my point. This like that, but… so much worse.

“On speed, or something,” said Jon.

“On speed?” repeated Martin, amused. “Jon, just out of curiosity, what do you think speed is?”

“Well, it’s methamphetamine,” said Jon, and several more eyes than expected opened. “Chemically, it’s C10H15N. It’s a central nervous system stimulant, highly addictive, related to amphetamine which has a common medical use, but with worse side-effects. Generally  a white, odorless, bitter-tasting powder, it dissolves easily in water or alcohol, and…” He realized they were staring at him. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

Wow, said John.

Martin was smiling. Dried egg shone on his face and made his hair stick in all directions, but he was smiling. “Gods, I love you,” he said. “You’re adorable.”

“I am not … look. We need to get out of here soon. The Chasm isn’t a safe place. There just wasn’t anywhere else to go right now.”

“Was this ledge even here?” said Arthur. “Or did it appear because we needed it?”

“I don’t know ,” Jon cried after a moment. “Why don’t I know?”

“Hey, easy,” said Martin, leaning in and placing one sticky hand on Jon’s sticky arm. “It’s all right. I don’t expect you to know everything, and neither do these two yahoos.”

“Yahoo, yourself,” said Arthur warmly.

I don’t think you can know everything, anyway. Can you?

“I don’t know that, either,” said Jon. “I just want to know enough to get us out of here and safely to—” He stopped.

“To?” said Martin. “Where are we going, anyway?”

Jon looked at Arthur.

He’s looking at you, Arthur.

Arthur went still. “You know, don’t you? You know… that.”

“I do,” said Jon quietly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t try to know it. I’m not… attempting to be invasive.”

Martin looked back and forth, eyes wide. “Should I ask?” he said slowly. “Or is this one of those things where if I find out too soon, I’ll just go mad?”

“It’s not mine to tell,” said Jon. “But we are headed in a specific direction.”

Arthur’s face turned toward him. “We… we are? You’re doing that?”

“Of course,” said Jon, sounding posh. “Naturally.”

Arthur ducked his head. He was crying. John’s hand wiped at his tears. “Gross,” said Arthur, because there was goop everywhere, and he and John both laughed weakly. “Martin, I… Jon, you can tell him. I…”

“I’ll wait until we’re out,” Jon said. “You don’t have to listen.”

“Thank you,” said Arthur, softly.

“What is making the eggs, anyway?” said Martin, wisely changing topics. “You said ‘she.’”

Jon looked so solemn. “She’s a gh’pluh from a planet I can’t pronounce. Sort of a… sapient… chicken dragon one-eyed giant. Her species lives its entire life in the air.”

“How?” said Martin. “That can’t—how?”

“It’s a wildly different ecosystem than what we know,” said Jon. “The thing is… she lost all her eggs. They are laid… well, her cloaca is on her back.”

“That would be really messy,” said Martin slowly.

“They’ve adapted. It’s more hygienic than you might think; but the key here is she was deeply ill, and her eggs couldn’t stay attached.”

“Oh, fuck,” said Arthur. “So all her babies fell to their deaths.”

“Yes.”

Then she did? John said.

“Then she did. She… she hasn’t found her children. What we just experienced was a storm of her grief.” Jon looked into the Chasm, not at Arthur.

Arthur swallowed. He tried very hard not to consider what his own grief-storm would be. “Is it… hard to do that, here? Find someone?” he finally said.

“Yes,” said Jon. “They imagine, too. You’re trying to sail two discrete tidal waves with one will.”

Arthur fell silent.

Martin again steered them clear. “Wish I had a way to make us some tea.”

And in the gloom of the Chasm, Jon’s eyes seemed to glow briefly green. “There’s water up ahead in the red forest.”

“The… the what?” said Martin.

“The red forest. It isn’t far.”

There was no forest in sight, said John.

“It will be when we climb out of here, which we should be able to do soon,” said Jon.

Martin touched his arm. “You don’t have to be the one taking care of all of us, you know. That isn’t… that isn’t owed.”

Jon turned his face away and did not answer.

Heavy with thought, they all sat for a while, silent  as the pounding of eggs continued overhead, and did not speak again until it quieted.

#

Martin peeked over the Chasm’s edge. “What?” he said, climbing out. “There’s no egg.”

“How can there be no egg?” Arthur said, climbing out alongside him. 

Fucking hell, he wasn’t wrong. There’s no egg. But there is… well, that’s a red forest if I’ve ever seen one.

“Like… like fall colors?” Arthur said hopefully.

Uh. No.

The ground was unnervingly like brain matter—gyri and sulci, but a brilliant red instead of pink. The trees that grew out of it were tangled , thick and impossible growths, sharp-edged and disturbingly lacy where the wood joined. 

There were no leaves; merely a dull red glow, filling the spaces. John thought it might be pulsing. 

This red forest stretched as far as he could see from left to right, only skipping the Chasm. There was no way forward without going through. Uh, he said again. Maybe we can… go back down and reset this view?

“No,” said Jon. “We have to go through it. Besides, it won’t be that dangerous for us. It’s not occupied by any living thing, exactly. There’s fresh water in there, too.” He accepted Martin’s hand and climbed out.

The moment he did, the ledge they’d been on broke and fell, tumbling, crashing into the sides of the Chasm, echoing forever.

“Was that… what we were just on?” said Arthur, his eyes huge.

“We… didn’t need it anymore?” suggested Jon, weakly.

“Reassuring,” Arthur mumbled.

Did you make it? said John.

“I don’t know. I just knew it was there,” said Jon.

It sure seems like you conjured it, somehow. Kept it for us.

“I don’t know how,” Jon said. “I don’t know what I did, and if we depend on that when I don’t know how to do it—”

“Hey. Shh. It’s all right,” said Martin.

Jon fell silent.

“What did you mean, ‘not occupied by any living thing, exactly ?’” said Arthur.

“It’s a grief-place,” said Jon. “We can’t die here, as you know, but we can… succumb. Give up. Remain in one place and feed the Dark World with unending, spiraling sorrow, and some people do. But it isn’t… it’s not inevitable, even for them. They could wake up. They’d have to choose this.”

John audibly gulped. So the trees are people.

“Yes.”

“Oh, gods, it’s horrible,” said Martin.

Jon took his hand. “Some places are, here. But I need you to believe me that other places are as good as this is terrible. It comes down to us. It’s our choices.”

Martin exhaled slowly, cheeks puffed out. “Why do we have to face this grief-forest right now?”

“I don’t know. It seems to be a theme, today," said Jon.

Arthur hung his head.

It’s not you. 

“Sure, John.”

If you were powerful enough to bring a forest of grieving souls to us, you'd be powerful enough that we would have already found her.

Arthur made a small sound.

John held his hand.

They walked in silence, inevitably toward the forest.

#

The red forest smelled vaguely like strawberry ChapStick. 

“Pink and waxy,” Martin said, stepping carefully. “I swear, I can taste it.” The ridges in the ground were solid and did not give way underfoot as he’d feared, but the gaps between them were just wide enough to threaten twisted ankles. (Which he did not even have to twist. He reminded himself. He told himself. It sure felt like he had ankles, though.)

“Familiar with that taste, are you?” Jon teased.

“I mean, yeah,” said Martin. “You don’t know all my phases.”

Jon laughed softly. “I want to. All of them. Everything about you.”

“Will I be boring to you then?” said Martin, only mostly joking. 

“Not as long as there is love within me,” said Jon. “Not as long as I have eyes to see.”

“Jonathan Sims! That was positively poetic.”

“I’m trying,” Jon said, cheeks flushed.

Sappy, pronounced John.

Arthur smiled weakly. “Let them have it. Do we just… keep walking straight?” 

“Yes,” said Jon. “Specific direction doesn’t matter. We intend to leave, and so we will.”

Arthur’s jaw set. “I’ll go on ahead a bit,” he said, stuck his hands in his pockets, and hurried.

Martin swallowed. “That bad, huh?”

“He lost his daughter in a tragic accident,” said Jon softly.

"Gods, no!"

“She drowned in the bathtub. It wasn’t anybody’s fault, but…”

“How could he not feel like it was?” said Martin, softly. “I still feel guilty over my mum dying, and that had absolutely nothing to do with me.”

Jon took his hand. 

"So you meant trying to find his daughter."

"Yes."

"I'm in."

"I knew you would be," Jon said warmly.

They walked in silence for a moment. “Anyway, if you can figure out tea on our route, I’d consider that a good use of your godly powers.”

Jon laughed. “Sure. Tea plants. I can do that. Probably.”

Martin kissed his cheek.

“I am all over egg!” Jon protested.

“So am I. I still love you.”

Jon leaned in. “We’re both insane.”

“Long as we’re complementary in it, I don’t care,” said Martin.

“Pathetic,” said Jon.

“Absolutely pitiful,” said Martin.

“Particularly fascinating,” said a hissing voice they’d never heard before, and something long, white, and heavy tackled Jon from behind with enough force to tear him away.

#

You’re not in danger, John said. As if I’d let you drown here, after everything we’ve been through.

“I wonder, John,” said Arthur, “just how fair it is, though.”

Fair?

“You’re a god, or part of one. You shouldn’t be experiencing all of this with me.”

What the hell are you saying?

“I’m not good for you. There. I said it. You're probably supposed to be in some weird heaven for your kind, and instead, you're stuck here with me.”

John’s hand rose and lightly smacked Arthur in the face.

“Ow! What the hell?”

Stop being stupid. I chose to stick here with you. I clung to you on purpose when we died. I'm doing it now. Shut up.

“I’m not… look here, you.”

No. You don’t get to have it both ways. If I’m part of a god—-“

“Which you are!”

Then I damn well get to decide what I do with me, and you!

“I didn’t say you were my god.”

You little punk , said John, who had no face to smile, but gave the impression, anyway.

Then, behind them, Martin screamed.

Arthur spun on his heel and ran toward the sound, tripping on the odd surface, half on all fours, unstoppable.

#

Jon knew he had no real body. He did; he knew it, fully understood and believed this, but he didn’t feel it yet, the power of it, the freedom.

What he felt now was pain.

The thing had clomped horrible jaws right on the back of his neck, as if to sever his head from his body. The pain—electric, heavily limp— ragdolled him as the thing’s inertia wrenched them both forward and away from Martin, who screamed.

Jon’s eyes opened. Searching for Martin, whose voice had gone distant and panicked.

“Pleh!” said the thing, spitting Jon roughly from its mouth. “What is that! Rotten egg? What have you been doing, little god?”

Shouting, shouting in the distance, but Jon knew they couldn’t see him, wouldn’t reach him on time. 

It was going to eat his brain (was it?) and his heart (how?) and digest him, absorb all he was, become him in a way only gods could end here, a death everlasting, an action verb forever, and he was too scared to do anything more than cry out.

“Well,” said the thing. “It won’t be the worst marinade I’ve ever had.” And it opened its mouth too wide, too wrong , and bit his head, and it didn’t matter that he had no skull because it was cracking and that long tongue was pushing inside—

Arthur hit it like a train.

Slammed into it, full-speed, with a weight and density he did not possess but the will of a battering ram.

The monster wrenched off Jon, tearing skin, its black tongue sliding out of his skull in the worst feeling he had ever known, and panic followed: had he already lost himself? Was he lobotomized? Was he damaged now, half devoured, useless?

“Jon!” cried Martin, landing beside him to grab him up. “No, no, no, Jon!” His scream was—

He thought Jon was dying. Was Jon dying? He didn’t know!

Horrible sounds rose from where Arthur fought the thing, vicious yowling like some bobcat in a blender.

Jon didn’t want to die (he couldn’t , he knew , but Martin’s grief—)

Damn you! John roared.

The creature gasped. “ H'aaztre ?” it said in terrible awe, and Arthur cried out as the battle changed from a monster trying to get away to a monster trying to eat him.

Martin let out one sob.

That sound rocked the world. Slowed time. Turned it all to low and terrible distortion, and in that moment, Jon saw three things.

One was Kayne, barely visible behind Martin, a man-shape blur with sharp red eyes,  watching with clinical and unmoving focus.

Two: The other was truth. He was damaged, because he believed he was. Except he wasn’t damaged. He was fine. It was fear speaking, making him wrong, an unreliable witness to himself.

Three: the god-eater currently trying to eat John contained within itself a multitude of the eaten, and if Jon ate it instead, he would gain what they used to be.

“Jon!” Martin cried in long, bass tones, stretched in time like taffy.

Kayne watched.

It all seemed distant, and strangely clear. If he ate that thing, Jon could know so much. Could have it all, immediately upon swallowing. But that would be doing what he dreaded being done to him.

No. He would not eat the creature. That’s not what Martin would want. Those suffering god-bits needed to be freed, able to renew themselves. That’s what Jon would have wanted for himself. Jon knew .

“No, you don’t!” Arthur snarled with glacial speed, somehow avoiding the black tongue striking like a snake, attempting to get into his eyes. 

Jon couldn’t explain what he did. It was instinct. It was Jordan Kennedy all over again. It was no Ceaseless Watcher, but his will, and he had no idea how it worked.

But it did work.

Jon woke the trees closest to Arthur and showed them Martin’s grief. They didn’t know he was still alive—that Martin wept though he did not have to. They knew Martin’s despair because Jon fed it to them, and knew what was the cause and, with absolutely terrifying silence, slid through the sulci of sad, red soil and descended on the god-eater. 

Arthur was simply knocked aside. Martin gasped. Arthur cursed. The god-eating creature screamed as the trees widened their impossible lacy wood and took pieces of this monster into every small eyelet. 

The incorruptible within this thing could no longer be contained, and it exploded. The trees nearest popped into shrapnel, spraying everywhere, and everybody cried out. There was wood-creaking weirdness for a moment as nearby trees shifted, then silence.

Arthur panted. “What? What the fuck?”

I… I don’t know! It exploded!

Martin held Jon, still sobbing. “Jon.”

Jon was fine. He knew he was fine, and as he leaned into that, he was. “It’s okay. I’m okay. I’m okay.” He touched Martin’s cheek.

Martin stared. “The… it’s gone? The hole’s gone! You’re okay? You…” He clutched so tightly that if Jon had needed to breathe, he wouldn’t be able to.

“I’ve got you,” said Jon, clutching back. 

“Did we just… murder a bunch of grieving souls?” said Arthur.

“No,” said Jon. “They’re freed, like the gods that thing already ate. They’re all free. Maybe the grievers will choose to take root again, but they don’t have to.”

Okay, what? What the fuck?

“What did that thing call you, John?” said Arthur.

I don’t… I don’t know. I mean, it was Hastur’s name, but it wasn’t.

“Tried to eat you, anyway,” Arthur growled. “Fuck him.”

Yeah, said John less optimistically. Archivist, what the fuck did you do?

“I don’t know,” Jon said into Martin’s chest.

“Where did that thing come from?” Martin moaned.

“I didn’t see it,” said Jon. “I don't even know how long it was following us. I think I... can’t see them unless someone else I’m connected to does first. They’re camouflaged, somehow.”

“Shit,” said Martin.

“Okay,” said Arthur. “Okay. We just… we need to keep our eyes out. That means you, John.”

Of course it means me, nitwit.

“Did it come from the Chasm?” said Martin.

“I don’t know,” said Jon. “I don’t even understand what they are.”

Hey, maybe I’m crazy, said John dryly. But we should probably get the fuck out of here?

“Yeah.” Martin stood, lifting Jon. “I thought I lost you,” he whispered into Jon’s egg-thick hair. “I don’t… I can’t tell you how afraid I just was.”

Jon shuddered. “You can’t lose me,” he said.

“Sure.”

"You can't. You won't. I'll never leave you."

Martin shuddered, too. “Hey, Arthur,” he said slowly. “How did you do that, by the way? You… moved so fast, and hit it so damn hard. And you avoided that tongue-thing.”

“Fuck if I know,” said Arthur, apparently unbothered by that weirdness.

I don't know, either.

“Great,” said Martin. “We’re all mysteries today.”

Move, people, said John. If I have to take point, I fucking will.

“I don’t think anyone minds,” said Jon.

Oh. John paused. Okay. Uh. Sure. Arthur, turn left and go straight. Not that far left.

“Fucking place needs public transport,” muttered Arthur.

“They do closer to the cities,” said Jon. “I don’t know if you understand how far away we are from any reasonable parts of the Dark World.”

There are no reasonable parts.

“There are… slightly more stable parts,” said Jon. “And that’s where we need to go.”

Nobody said the reason. Then Arthur did. “She’s there?”

“I don’t know yet, but I believe so.”

Arthur swallowed.

“We’ll go wherever’s needed to find her, you know,” said Martin. “You get that, right? You won’t do this alone.”

“You don’t even… you never knew her,” said Arthur.

“So?”

Arthur turned his face toward Martin. “You don’t know what you’re saying.”

Martin scoffed, still holding Jon under his arm. “Spend as much time with the Lonely as I did, and you’d end up knowing exactly what you’re saying, too. Besides… ask this guy how easily I give up when I’ve got a goal in mind.”

“You don’t,” said Jon. “One thousand, one hundred, and fifty nine cups of tea before I finally realized you were trying to tell me something.”

"Worth it," Martin said and kissed his forehead. “So Jon’s stubborn, too, is what I'm saying. You've got help."

“Thank you,” whispered Arthur. "Thank you both."

We’ve got this, said John.

"Hey, listen," said Arthur. "What's that?"

The red forest was finally thinning out, and at last, they found the water Jon had promised. It was clean, crystal-clear, a patch of water flowing quick and cold like a river saying hello from deep underground.

They were all silent as they stripped and bathed, sputtering in the cold and deeply grateful for it.

Their clothes were gone when they finished. Somehow, it made sense. “Offering to the woods?” suggested Martin.

“Fuck if I know,” said Arthur, and fished a new outfit from his pack.

#

At long last, the ground stopped being made of ridges and valleys. “That was a big place,” said Martin softly.

“You have no idea,” said Jon, tucked under his arm again. “It stretches the whole width of the Dark World, and it’s growing all the time."

“That doesn’t seem right,” said Martin. “Not everyone there deserves to be there, I’m sure.”

“It’s not about deserving. It’s choices,” said Jon. 

“I think it’s more complicated than that,” Martin gently chided. “Though… not to change the subject, but my ankles shouldn’t feel better? I know I don’t have any. I know I don’t. But damn, they feel a lot better.”

“I still want a damn car,” said Arthur.

“Naw,” said Martin. “We need the Mystery Machine. Because we're mysteries, you know?”

"Ha," said Jon.

“The what?” said Arthur.

“It’s this van from a cartoon called Scooby—” He stopped.

The fuck.

Arthur stopped, too.

Jon started laughing. 

Before them sat an egregiously teal van. It was without question a 1965 Dodge A100, painted wildly with love-child flowers and a deeply groovy font proclaiming it The Mystery Machine.

“What?” said Arthur. “What?”

Apparently, Martin really wanted that cartoon van, said John dubiously.

“Let’s see if it drives, shall we?” said Martin. “And nobody imagine monsters inside it, or something.”

“Well, now I am,” muttered Arthur, but followed Martin’s voice.

The van inside was lovingly pristine; it had shag carpet and a horizontal bench seat in the back, all an eye-watering orange; up front were two more bench seats, still orange, and—to Martin’s delight—a full tank of gas.

He turned the key, and it started.

They all took this in, the rumbling of the engine and the acrid smell of the exhaust more mind-blowing than anything they’d experienced today.

“So let’s try,” said Arthur. 

“We’ll be a target,” said Jon. “This thing is noisy as hell.”

“But we’ll also make a lot more distance,” said Arthur.

“You’re thinking too logically. It’s possible we won’t make any distance at all,” said Jon.

“Jon,” said Martin. “Get in the damn van.”

Jon laughed. So did Arthur and John.

The seats were shockingly comfortable, and though the steering wheel was not on the side Martin was used to, he drove it just fine; happily, he knew how to drive manual. "Worked delivery for a while. I was fifteen and it was so illegal, but whatever," said Martin.

Jon settled against him, meaning to stay awake, to keep track of it all, to try to keep him safe. "What are we, I wonder?"

"Hm?" said Martin, pulling out.

"We're all weird, you know? Or maybe everyone is weird, and I'm just assuming, but..."

"No, you're right," said Martin. "We're... I don't want to say special, because that's the wrong word, but it all feels terribly chosen, somehow."

"It does," Jon murmured, soothed by the softness of Martin's belly, soothed by the warmth of his jumper. "We should... think about it."

"Rest," Martin murmured back. "You've got to be exhausted."

"Can't be," Jon mumbled, and then he fell asleep.

He dreamed of Kayne repeatedly poking his sleeping form, going, Why did you do that? But Jon had no reply.

[random-vore-blog]

Interesting Hashira

The air was cold as the clone in dark blue stood there with angry silver eyes. He was not happy with how the emotionless Hashira attempted to try and slay the main body.

Thankfully, said Hashira avoided the attack from the freezing temperatures. But not from the blood that dripped onto her head and shoulders that stained her clothes with a dark red.

" To see those who aren't heart broken breaks me."

A clone said right behind her, before her heart ached. However, she didn't show any emotion, like always when encountering a demon. Especially when she got injured herself. All three seemed to have an interest in how she didn't react to pain.

But when she came at one of the clones, the dark magenta eyed clone instinctively kicked her. HARD. All three of them watched her fly towards a large tree stump, the force so string that a sickening crack filled the air.

All their eyes widened as she kept sitting up for a few minutes- thanks to the support from the stump- before falling forward. She didn't move her lower waist, only her arms and head. Her blank blue-green eyes moved to look at them. Her massive axe with spikes fell out of her hands.

" I told you to not to try and kill her, Hyuko!"

" I wasn't trying to kill her!"

The Clone of Heartbreak, now dubbed as Hyuko, argued with the silver eyed one. The Clone of Purity looked at them both argue before turning his attention to the Hashira. Her emotionless gaze stared at him.

" You must be pure if you don't have the scent of dead humans or demons... How rare."

His voice was silky and soft. Unlike the other one with silver eyes arguing with Hyuko whom had a rougher and deeper voice that sounded like thunder. At least the temperatures weren't freezing anymore.

She kept staring before going unconscious. He landed, white wings folded behind him as he looked at the woman. His entire attire was as white as snow. His wings too, replicating the wings of an angel. A false angel, as he was called.

He turned to look at the other two clones.

" How can we take her with us if the Demon King wants to accomplish his goal?"

Hyuko, the largest clone, spoke up with a questioning and uncertain voice.

" Take her? With us? She is a human- a Hashira. She is nothing but food to us! There is no way we can take her with us!"

" I am in charge, and I tell you what to do. Now pick her up and take her with us. Or would you rather I take her?"

" You take her. I don't need my heart to be broken more than it should be."

Hyuko growled, picking her up and gave her to Maronu as gently as he could. After all, any human that caught their attention would get a not so harsh treatment or get killed. Too interesting and precious to do so.

" ... I'll do it the old fashioned way. The Main body can't stop me, nor can the King himself."

" You would risk the life of a pure human? By eating them?"

Maronu sighed, irritated by the questions that were directed towards him. He was going to lose it-!

" Would you rather let some other demon kill this interesting human?"

" No-"

" That's what I thought."

He turned his gaze towards the human in his arms before sighing.

" We need Junichi for this."

He gently laid the human down and looked at his other selves, the other two clones. Their eyes showed shock and hesitance.

" Come on. It won't be painful."

They both looked at each other- which gave Maronu the opportunity. He grabbed them by the head, absorbing them like Sekido did with Aizetsu, Urogi and Karaku in order to clone Zohakuten.

He fell to his knees, clothes tearing apart to accommodate the size of the new clone.

" A human?"

The clone spoke, voice velvety and sweet. He looked at her before picking her up. His interest was evident.

" How peculiar."

He took off the mask that covered his mouth, a thought from one of the three clones ran through his mind. His eyes squinted, before he sighed.

His jaws opened, fangs sharp and long with a black maw. The kanji " calmness" engraved on his tongue in white.

He stuck his tongue out as he placed her head in his maw, preventing her from getting scraped by his sharp teeth. Saliva coated her, before he tilted his head up to allow her to slip in and down his throat via gravity.

She slipped down his throat easily, and he swallowed, making sure to put on his mask after he had both fully swallowed her fully and closed his mouth.

Her body, as cold and small as it was, entered his core. The feeling of fullness welcomed him with open arms, the three clones he was made up of were pleased.

" Interesting taste."

He commented.

" You will see me again very soon, human. Maybe even sooner than you think."

He opened his wings and took off- on his way to their hideout.

I hope you enjoyed! Sorry for a long wait of new short stories ;-;... I was mostly busy and had little time-

[mlmvoreconfessionals]

Coild we get some asgore prey prompts specifically to some big hungry human men?

Yeah, why not, I got a couple ideas.

A.sgore had finally decided to try dating again now that he was on the surface and his options seemed so much wider. It was surprisingly easy to find humans who didn't mind that he was a monster, but a few dates go by and he doesn't really...well, feel anything. At least until he met a human much like him--a larger man, thick muscles hidden just under a bit of plush fat and a large belly that made him seem huggable. A.sgore and him had hit it off well, and he thought things were going great. So he was excited to go back to the man's home to continue their date after dinner. After a night of fun in bed, A.sgore was content drifting off to sleep next to the human. The human, however, had an extra plan for that night. he licks his lips as he pulls the king a bit closer to himself. Dinner had been fine, but not nearly filling enough, and A.sgore was just the right size to be one hell of a meal. The human's drooling maw opens wide as he guides the sleeping monster's head inside, horns and all. He's slow and careful while devouring him, not wanting to wake the king up. A.sgore seemed like a nice enough guy, and if it wasn't for the fact that he'd been hungry, the human might've kept him around. But once he got that first taste, there was no going back. Soft, steady gulps work A.sgore deeper and deeper down the hatch, the human getting to enjoy tasting over the soft dadbod the goat had. All the while, A.sgore slept on peacefully, exhausted after the most intense sex of his life. He doesn't even stir as his feet are slurped up and his entire body is curled up in the human's gut. The man belches into his fist then lets out a soft chuckle. He pats his gut a few times and settles back in bed. "Gonna have to try more monster after all...hope they're all as sweet and filling as you." The human slurps over his lips and drifts off to sleep alongside A.sgore, whoc continued to sleep blissfully through his own digestion. Only one of them would wake up the following day, the human grumbling to himself as he waddles into his bathroom. "Dammit...I didn't think magic would be so fattening..." He squeezes his gut in the mirror with a soft frown. It'd doubled in size thanks to A.sgore, not to mention the damage to the man's thighs and ass. Maybe he'll cut back a bit on monster after all. But at least he got the tastiest one of the bunch.

A.sgore drops to his knees, exhausted. He has to use his trident to remain upright at all. The human who had come through here, looking for a way out, had proved far stronger than A.sgore thought. He doesn't even have the energy to fire a bit of magic at him anymore. "I suppose...this is it then," A.sgore says, lowering his head. "To get out of here...you'll have to take my soul. You've won so...please...go ahead. I think I'd like some rest." He heard the human approaching him and figured that he was going to be struck down with the final blow. But then his head is lifted up, letting him look right up at the human. The human is large, clearly an adult who ate well. He ate...very well, A.sgore would realize, as he watches those drooling jaws open wide. Everything goes dark as his head is engulfed and the human begins to devour him. He doesn't have the energy to fight back against it. All he can do is let the human work hi down, armor and all. For a moment, he wonders if any other monsters were sent down the very same path, but he doesn't ponder it for long as he begins to spill into the human's gut. A.sgore can feel his predator moving around, eventually realizing that the human must have sat on his throne. By then, he's only a pair of legs hanging from the drooling human's maw, and with a wet slurp and a few more gulps, even those are packed away into the tight gut. The human licks his lips and pats his gut a few times. He lets out a crass belch, sending A.sgore's crown flying out of his jaws. It bounces off his gut and makes the king shift a bit. It'd been a big meal--one he wasn't even sure he'd get done--but the human found that A.sgore had been too easy to slurp up. Like he'd always been meant to be food. The human relaxes there, his guts roaring to life as it gets to work on melting the king down. He rubs over his stomach, occasionally belching up a piece of armor as A.sgore is melted right out of it. The protruding bulges steadily sink back in, letting the human's gut get rounder and smaller as the goat is processed. A.sgore didn't resist for a second--he'd lost, fair and square, and now he was being given the chance to rest like he wanted. He closes his eyes and relaxes, his softening body falling apart into a thick slurry. The human belches deeply, sending his chest plate flying out to lay in the flowers with the rest of his armor. That's all that would be left of him by the time anyone came by, the human long gone with A.sgore little more than some added heft wobbling on his midsection.

[ofpineapplesanddawns]

Here's the Martin/Peter idea I kept thinking about at work but couldn't write cause write fics on my phone sucks.

Warning: weird vampire anatomy

On with the fic!

--

"Where did you get that doctor's bag?" Peter asked as he sat on his dining room table, a cool gothic looking piece he barely ate at and mainly just used for putting his stuff on and sometimes... seeing how sturdy it was (which is very much is a sturdy piece of antique Victorian furniture).

"Never you mind." Martin smiled as he slipped on his gloves and opened the bag, pulling out an assortment of tools and instruments. "Now, make with the face. And remove your shirt as well, please, it makes it so much easier to study when there are less obstacles in the way."

Peter stuck out his tongue and removed his tank top, throwing it somewhere off to the side before he rubbed at his face, not really wanting to do this. Martin had been bugging him for weeks to study his vampire face, and Peter thought it was stupid and invasive on his personal space, but he finally caved when Martin agreed to something Peter had been asking him to do in the bedroom for weeks.

He removed his hands and Martin was staring. Peter could feel the differences in his face, his hands, all over his body where his vampire nature made itself more well known. He absolutely hated it, but it was part of him now, and he had no choice in the matter.

"Alright, probe me." Peter said, spreading his arms.

Martin grunted, rolling his eyes, as he picked up a tool and started to tug at Peter's now-pointed ears, looking inside. "How well is your hearing? Is echolocation a thing for your species?"

"It's better than ever, which is great, considering I think I was starting to get that ringing issue from all the shit I do on stage. And going clubbing." Peter said, wincing when Martin pulled on his ear. "And echolocation is a thing, it's weird, but kinda cool. Works better when I'm adorable and furry."

"Do you make noises in your current form to do it?"

"You mean making weird chirps and screams? Yeah."

"Fascinating." Martin mumbled before writing something down on a notepad he clearly took from Peter, since it had fake blood splatter on the pages. The things you drunkenly buy online.

He looked at Peter's eyes, his mouth, even touching at his fangs. He asked questions and Peter asked them to the best of his ability. Martin even looked at his finger and toe nails, which were longer, pointed, and very sharp. They still had nail polish on them, but Peter would have to touch them up when he looked human again.

Martin pulled out a stethoscope and listened to Peter's heart, frowning. "It's weird, there's a heart beat, but it's so slow and weak, yet you seem perfectly healthy for a man your age."

"Oi, I'm not that old! I'm not a graying dilf like you!"

"I meant that as a compliment, and I hope you meant what you said as one as well." Martin grinned at him and Peter hissed, hoping he got spit on the guy's face.

"Alright, time to check your lungs." Martin said. "Turn around, it's easier to check from the ba- oh!"

Peter had shifted around, having dreaded this part of the exam but knew it would happen eventually. "Yeah, yeah, don't make a big deal about 'em."

"But... but you have wings!"

"Tiny, pathetic wings that don't do shit!"

Peter felt the wings on his back twitch and flap against his skin twice. They were fully functional bat wings, but the problem with them was that they were exactly the size they'd be if he were in his bat form!

They were so tiny and weak that they couldn't do anything except move and flap without making him airborne. "They're not really impressive, but some fur and leather and extra bones."

Martin gently took one in his hands, studying it in awe. "But this is amazing! You have wings that are moving and working! Can you fly?"

"Do you honestly believe tiny ass wings like that can carry my sorry ass?" Peter snorted. "I mean, I'm a skinny guy, but even I'm not light enough for these pathetic things to do that!"

"Ah, I see." Martin ran a finger over the small patch of light brown fur between the wings and Peter shivered. "Still, that's amazing! I didn't know you had these!"

Peter shifted, his face feeling a bit warmer since Martin kept petting that tiny fur patch. "Y-yeah, well, they only show up when I look like a B-movie monster."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that. You're much more handsome than those silly prosthetic features."

"Gee, thanks." Peter sniffed and squeaked, actually squeaked, when he felt Martin scratch the spot like he would a cat's ear. "S-stop that..!"

Martin sounded like he was grinning when he said "Oh! That's an interesting reaction!"

"Oh my God."

"Is this one of those erogenous zones people have?"

"Don't fuckin' say that about my bat wings!"

"How cute! I wonder if any other bat features of yours are as sensitive."

"God, you are a horrible doctor! No wonder you lost your license!"

"I think that was the murders, actually."

"Shut up!" Peter squeaked again. "Stop touchin' it!"

Martin laughed. "Ah, but progress requires more touching!"

"No, it does not!"

--

Peter is just really sensitive back there, I don't think it's an erogenous zone, haha.

(And yes, this sort of thing is true for Hardy in my Vardy au, he does have tiny wings on his back as well, but no one ever sees them because he's always in baggy suits)

[koolkat9]

Count Your Blessing

Rating: T

Relationship: England + Canada

Word Count: 709

Read on AO3

Chapter 4

Clothes

Snacks

Crafts/Other Activities

Car/Booster seat

The usual groceries

That seemed like everything. Was there anything else a child needed nowadays? Toys! Though he could always get some of Matthew’s old ones from Canada. But that would require flying 7-8 hours with a four-year-old. He would get him new toys, and if they ever went back to Canada while Matthew was still like this, they’d grab some of the old toys then. 

Toys

Hopefully, that was everything. 

“Matthew?” Arthur called, “Are you ready?”

Matthew came rushing into the living room, his new shoes squeaking against the floor. He beamed up at Arthur, shirt buttons uneven.

Arthur chuckled, crouching down and fixing up the boy’s shirt so each button was in the right hole. Luckily, some of Peter’s old clothes fit Matthew. 

He took Matthew’s hand and led him to the car. Making do without the car seat, the two set off. 

First stop was picking up a booster seat. Luckily, some descendants of a human family he befriended during the last war were giving up theirs and agreed to give it to Arthur to borrow. 

With Matthew more secure, they set off to the clothing store to get Matthew some of his own clothes that would fit his four-year-old self. Then next door to get some activities to keep the young boy busy and a few toys to keep him company. 

The last stop was the grocery store to pick up snacks and groceries. By then, Matthew seemed slightly restless. He tried not to let it show, always afraid of disappointing people. But Arthur could tell by the way the boy fiddled with his new moose toy that he had enough of running errands. 

“Just this last store, lad. Then home. If you’re good, perhaps I’ll pick up some ice cream for us later.” 

Matthew beamed and ran off ahead to try to pull out a trolley. 

“Woah there. Here, let me help.” Arthur tugged out one of the trolleys 

Matthew wandered ahead, with Arthur following behind with the trolley, attention half on Matthew and the other half on the grocery list.

Arthur had only turned around for a moment after walking past the cucumbers, but when he turned back around, Matthew was gone. Arthur looked around frantically. The lad couldn’t have gone far right?

He strode down each aisle, but among the bodies, it was hard to spot Matthew’s small frame. If only he was back to his gigantic size that always towered over Arthur. 

Just as Arthur was about to go up to request an announcement to be made, amongst the voices of other customers, he heard sniffling. He desperately followed the sound.

He was led to the freezer section, where the ice cream was held. There was Matthew, curled up next to the freezer, hands over his ears, eyes squeezed shut and tears dripping out, stuffed animal abandoned on the floor. Arthur sped-walk towards him, trying to keep his composure. 

“Matthew,” Arthur called. “Matthew!”

Matthew’s eyes snapped open. As soon as he spotted Arthur, he leaped up, throwing himself at his father. 

“It’s okay, my boy,” Arthur murmured, rubbing up and down Matthew’s back, “You’re alright.”

He crouched to be at Matthew’s level, pulling the boy from where he latched on. “But you  cannot  ever wander off like that again,” he said gravely, “Do you understand?”

Matthew nodded, rubbing his nose with his shirt sleeve creating a snotty mess.