#handling the undead review

[tinyreviews]

Tiny Review: Handling The Dead 2024. Super dull.

It feels like a thin cross between Skinnamarink and Manchester By The Sea. Definitely not a zombie movie. Nor horror. Nor a drama.  

Very niche. No story at all. Just an unresolved premise.

Handling the Undead is a 2024 Norwegian horror mystery film, directed by Thea Hvistendahl from a screenplay by Hvistendahl and John Ajvide Lindqvist, based upon the novel of the same name by Lindqvist. It stars Renate Reinsve, Bjørn Sundquist, Bente Børsum, Anders Danielsen Lie, Bahar Pars and Inesa Dauksta.

[fearsmagazine]

HANDLING THE UNDEAD - Review

DISTRIBUTOR: NEON

SYNOPSIS: In the sweltering heat of a summer in Oslo, the deceased unexpectedly awaken, plunging three families into disarray as their beloved departed ones return. Questions arise about their identities and intentions. One family grapples with the resurrection of their mother, a sudden revival before they had the chance to grieve her tragic passing in a car accident. On the same day she buries her soulmate, an elderly woman is reunited with the love of her life. In a desperate attempt to alleviate his daughter’s depression, a grandfather rescues his grandchild from the clutches of the grave.

REVIEW: John Ajvide Lindqvist's literary career took off with the publication of his debut novel, "Let the Right One In," in Sweden in 2004. This acclaimed work was later adapted into a film with the same title, released in 2008. In 2010, an American remake of the film was produced, followed by an American television series that premiered on Showtime in 2022.

John Ajvide Lindqvist's second novel, "Handling the Undead," was released in 2005, followed by a short story collection in 2006 entitled "Let the Old Dreams Die." One of the tales in this collection was set in the same universe as “Let the Right One In” and one in “Handling the Undead.”

As a fervent admirer of the film "Let the Right One In," I was immediately drawn to the novel when an English translation became available. When I learned that English translations of "Handling the Undead" and "Let the Old Dreams Die" were released in the United Kingdom, I promptly acquired my personal editions.

As someone who grew up on the George Romero zombie canon and its subsequent impact on the genre, I found John Ajvide Lindqvist's take on the subject to be both engaging and refreshing. The narrative was primarily driven by the experiences of various families and the government's response to the unfolding crisis. He crafted a new contemporary metaphor in relation to what the undead represent to social structures and family dynamics.

The film's narrative is significantly less substantive from the novel, focusing more on the reactions of three families to the reanimation of their deceased loved ones. The cause of the undead rising is altered, and much of the dialogue and character development is simplified. The first 8 ½ minutes of the film features no spoken dialogue, except for musical lyrics, and little throughout the entirety of the film. A key element of the novel is the silent return of the dead to specific locations, presented in various states of decay. The film briefly explores the living coming to terms with the undead, their actions and little else. While the novel's events span several weeks, the film portrays them as occurring over a couple of days. Having read the novel, I noticed significant omissions in the adaptation that diminished its impact. Certain changes made to the storyline were a disservice to the novel and, consequently, weakened the film's overall effect. By the end of the film, the living characters appear as lifeless as the undead.

The film primarily relies on ambience created by masterful cinematography, sound design, and score. It employs a dark, cold visual style with a limited color palette. Tight framing dominates, except for a few wide shots that showcase the cemetery and hospital after the undead arrive. The film features few costume changes, which contributes to its lack of sense of passing time. The score is sparingly used and is often integrated with the sound design. I found the makeup design for the undead particularly impressive, as it achieves a realistic and organic look. The editing instills energy into the film, maintaining viewer engagement throughout its 97-minute runtime.

The cast was remarkable, conveying emotions primarily through facial expressions and body language due to limited dialogue. Bahar Pars, a talented actress, delivers a memorable scene toward the film's end, leaving a lasting impact with its intensity. Dennis Østby Ruud, a promising young actor, shines in his performance, as do the actresses portraying the elderly couple. Despite the limited material provided, the entire cast showcased their abilities admirably.

In her feature film debut, HANDLING THE UNDEAD, director Thea Hvistendahl presents a meditative exploration of grief and loss, capturing the impossible desire to turn the past into the present. The film immerses us in a profound sense of sorrow right from the start, and by the end, leaves a lingering feeling of hopelessness. While the film attempts to convey the emotional weight of the story, it falls short in comparison to John Ajvide Lindqvist's original novel. The film lacks depth in terms of character development and emotional range, making it difficult to fully appreciate the author's achievements in the novel. Despite its limitations, the film may still pique your curiosity, leading you to seek out Lindqvist's compelling and complex novel.

CAST: Renate Reinsve, Anders Danielsen Lie, Bjørn Sundquis, Bente Børsum, Bahar Pars, Dennis Østby Ruud, & Inesa Dauksta. CREW: Director/Screenplay - Thea Hvistendahl; Screenplay - John Ajvide Lindqvist; Based on the novel of the same title by John Ajvide Lindqvist; Producers - Kristin Emblem & Guri Neby; Cinematographer - Pål Ulvik Rokseth; Score - Peter Raeburn; Editors - Trude Lirhus & Thomas Grotmol; Production Designer - Linda Janson; Costume Designer - Bente Ulvik; Sound Designers - Bent Holm, Andreas Franck, & Nils Viken; Make-up Effect Designer - Morten Jacobsen; VFX Supervisor - Otto Thorbjørnsen; SFX - Fiksern / Christopher Munthe. OFFICIAL: neonrated.com/films/handling-the-undead FACEBOOK: N.A. TWITTER: N.A. TRAILER: https://youtu.be/GFP8HtM8JTo?si=AO4gfwWZGXCjhQd- RELEASE DATE: Exclusively IFC Center NY May 31st & select cities June 7th, 2024.

**Until we can all head back into the theaters our “COVID Reel Value” will be similar to how you rate a film on digital platforms - 👍 (Like), 👌 (It’s just okay), or 👎 (Dislike)

Reviewed by Joseph B Mauceri

[kacic1]

A todos, boa noite! E hoje a noite é de arrepiar.

Hoje convido vocês a visitarem Os Filmes do Kacic, para conferir minha nova crítica sobre este intrigante horror estrelado por Renate Reinsve (A Pior Pessoa do Mundo), um dos destaques do Festival de Sundance deste ano, que discorre de maneira única sobre a temática dos zumbis. Imperdível para os fãs do gênero!

Crítica: DESCANSE EM PAZ (HANDLING THE UNDEAD) | 2024

[fleshengine]

So I watched Handling the Undead with my roomy and huh. I have no idea how to talk about it. It’s billed as a horror mystery film but it just isn’t. It’s not horrific. There’s horror elements, but that’s so not the focus. If I had to pin down something about it I’d say it’s a rumination on death, loss, and grief and there's zombies. I imagine it'd hit harder for someone who's had family members or people they care about die. I haven't, closest I've got is my mom flatlining on the table and then coming back when I practically a baby, and my grandad in the hospital just a few months ago. As it stands, it still hits hard and I nearly cried a couple times. So it's in the same vein of "zombie movie that makes you cry" as Cargo.

Overall, 9/10 the lighting, cinematography, acting and writing were all near perfect. There were a couple minor details that seemed sub par to me, but like… the movie is good.

[josephconrads]

Title: Handling the Undead

Author: John Ajvide Lindqvist

Rating: 5 out of 5

Review: I found out recently that this has a film adaption releasing in 2024 which meant a re-read of the novel was necessary. I had first picked this up from Borders during their closing sale. It’s a zombie novel, no doubt about it of course. However the association with zombie is the horror genre of which I would not categorize this novel. I enjoy it because yes, it’s a well written, well crafted novel but because it’s a novel of grief and the ways that we mourn. An examination of death and life using zombies to fuel the message. Certainly it’s not for everyone however I do enjoy it and the characters.

[daydream-cement]

Vines Forever Intertwined Ch. 3

Larissa Weems x OC (Fern Rogers)

Larissa and Fern make it to the safehouse.

Authors Note: Sorry this has taken so much time to write! I hope you enjoy!

The shapeshifter’s tone turned aggressive, her arms folded over her chest in a defiant manner, “We need to go home. We need to get back to the girls.”

Your hands gripped the steering wheel and you kept your gaze alternating between the road before you, the review mirror, and the directions pulled up on your phone. The best you could do at this point was trying to convince Larissa that you needed to keep going. “Riss, Agent Thatcher specifically said we need to stay away from Nevermore. Let’s go to the safe house. We need to rest and come up with a plan.”

“How can you say that?!” Larissa reached out and hit the dashboard in front of you causing you to jump. You hadn’t expected the sudden wave of visceral anger from your wife. “We have always been perfectly safe back home. If I can survive the Addamses, undead pilgrims, and psychotic ex-lovers, I think I can handle these people.”

It was too late to go back home. The drive would take another day and would necessitate the need to stop for gas - something you were not willing to do considering the assault you both faced in the parking garage. The safe house truly was the safest option right now. 

“There is no need for the dramatics. We are a few minutes from the safehouse... After everything that happened, we should just get somewhere safe.”

Larissa fell silent, obviously fuming that you could ever suggest not rushing back home immediately. For what was supposed to be a romantic getaway, you were certainly headed in the opposite direction. 

You completed the rest of the drive in an agonizing silence. 

While you drove, you couldn’t help but glance over into the passenger seat, but you weren’t looking at the shapeshifter. No, you were looking at the handprints melted into the car window - a now permanent fixture to remind you of the life threatening situation you both had been in an hour earlier. You found the warped window to be a terrifying symbol of life or death situations that were likely to come.

When you pulled into the driveway of the safehouse, there was an agent waiting for you both in the front driveway. After the car was in park, Larissa exited the vehicle wordlessly, still giving you the cold shoulder. 

With a roll of your eyes, you exit the car, coming face to face with the agent you would be staying with. The man was significantly taller than Larissa and you found yourself needing to take a step back in order to look him in the eye. He was undeniably handsome with a thick mane of dreadlocks and a joyful, wide grin, making you feel automatically at ease.

There was a golden glint to his brown eyes as he stretched out a hand, squeezing your hand just a little too hard. He spoke with a deep gravel to his voice, “Agent Morris. Nice to meet you. Let’s get you both inside so I can hopefully provide some clarity on everything you have been through in the past couple of hours.”

“That would be grea-”

Larissa rounded the car, cutting you off by ordering the agent about. “We need to get back to Vermont. We have no time to waste by playing spy with your organization. I have a school full of children who need me, two of them being my own, mind you.”

The agent didn’t seem phased by the shapeshifter’s demands and rather he offered her a smile and stretched out a hand to greet her as well. “I understand your concern, but you are a logical woman. Your children are more valuable to you alive, and I can assure you that your life and theirs will be in jeopardy if you choose to travel home.”

The headmistress clenched her jaw in response and turned away from you both, striding towards the house defiantly. 

The agent was kind enough to help you with the bags, offering you a quick notes version of the organization you were up against. You entered the old and cozy home and spotted the straight-faced shapeshifter who aggressively disappointed in you. As much as Larissa seemingly wanted you to sit elsewhere, you took a seat on the couch next to her, ready to hear the agent out.

“The company known as ‘Outcast Vitamins’ or ‘O-Vitamins’ is looking to bottle outcast abilities. This I’m sure you already know, but what was kept from you is the interest the company has on you both in particular.” Agent Morris took a seat across from you and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. 

“Both of your abilities are well known in the outcast world and they are more of interest to normies who are looking for a supplement they could take to give them abilities that are a little less... life altering.” As he spoke, he gestured towards you both when referring to your powers and to himself when mentioning lycanthropy. “Growing plants and shapeshifting-at-will may be a better selling point with the average consumer than lycanthropy or vampirism.” 

You inquired deeper, hoping to sell Larissa on the seriousness of the subject, “But what does that mean? What do they want from us? Do they want our DNA or something? ” 

“The process is... painful to say the least. There have been werewolves, vampires, and a siren that have been experimented on for the past few years. It’s sold as a medical study where people believe they will get paid for a few test trials, but...” Agent Morris glanced down into his hands, hesitating on having to share the survival rate. “About half of them survived... The issue with experimenting on the two of you is that your cellular makeup is different from the others. Larissa especially... Shapeshifting is something professional outcast scientists barely understand, let alone a few hacks in a lab. They would experiment and test on you for months before they might get something viable.”

Larissa spoke up, her hand reaching out and protectively squeezing your knee, “Again, what about my children and students? I have many outcasts that have a variety of abilities. Luring me away from them does not reassure me that they will be kept safe.” The intensity and coldness of Larissa’s tone seemed to have no impact on the agent. You felt the need to wince, knowing Larissa would be willing to escalate the argument if she felt it necessary. 

“I assure you there is no luring of anybody. We have agents on and around the premises of the school. According to inside sources, the company wants you two. A shapeshifter and a plant manipulator. Not only are your powers perfect for consumers, but they are particularly potent. You are both powerful and very in control of your abilities. O-Vitamins is very aware of your professional and personal history. They know what you are capable of.”

“We are just educators and mothers…” You rationalize, trying to push away the thought that there were people out to find and potentially harm you.

Agent Morris only smiled and shook his head, “I think we both know that isn’t true, doctor.” 

——

“Not only could we die… but they are after shapeshifters. Althea is in danger. Oh my god! What about my parents?” Larissa choked out the words as she dropped herself on the edge of the bed, trying to get the words out before she knew she would begin to cry. 

She looked up at you with tear-filled eyes, her arms parting as a silent command for you to hug her. You take two steps and position yourself between Larissa’s legs into her open arms. Her arms were soon raveled around you, squeezing you tight and pressing her face into your abdomen. 

You went about helping Larissa relax in the best way you knew how: unpinning her hair and gently massaging her scalp as you provided her comforting words. “We have no choice but to trust these agents. They will take care of the kids. Your parents are more than capable of taking care of themselves.” 

With her face planted into your abdomen, she shook her head, not wanting to believe everyone would be okay without her there. Larissa was preparing herself for worst case scenarios and you knew how hard it was to pull her out of anxious ruminating once she had already started. Typically, Larissa was the one to pull you out of your own emotional spiraling, but seeing her so vulnerable caused you to jump into action. 

“Honey, look at me...” You shifted your hands to either side of her face, pulling her away and holding her still as you crouched so as to look up into her eyes. Larissa seemed determined to look away from you for a moment, most likely due to her own embarrassment over crying, but you were more firm in your tone to make sure she knew you were serious. “Look at me.”

With sad (and somewhat pouty) eyes, Larissa met your gaze, shaking her head as more tears pooled in her eyes. 

While you didn’t have a full plan worked out, you needed to distract Larissa somehow and get her attention focused on something she could control. “We need to finish what we started and we will be back home before we know it.”

Larissa leaned into the touch of your left hand, closing her eyes and sounding more defeated than you had ever known her to be, “How are we going to take down an entire company? You saw the powers of that man. I’m sure they have other outcasts that can do more than melt the glass of car windows.” 

“I don’t know how, but I’d say it would be worth it to try... How else will we make it home to Al and Vi?”

The shapeshifter paused, sucking in a breath and thinking hard for a moment. When Larissa opened her eyes again, they held a new determination and fire that was much more reminiscent of the woman you fell in love with. “Tomorrow we should sit down with Agent Morris. I want to know more about this company and what we have to do. The sooner we get this done, the sooner we will be back home with the kids.” 

“That’s my girl.” You mumble, pulling her face down to press a kiss against her forehead. Releasing her face, you pushed yourself back into a standing position and brought a hand to rest on her cheek once more, “Let’s get a good night’s rest.”

Taglist: @charymobile, @bri-sonat, @ihavenoclue2008, @smutuniversesblog, @opheliauniverse, @enchantressb, @renravens, @shyladyfan, @peanutbutterprincess, @lvinhs, @ohana1996, @imlike-so-gaydude, @xuukoo, @brienneswife, @dumbasslesbi, @oculusalien, @kimiinou, @sweetderacine, @giogwensversion, @gela123, @thevillagegay, @naomi-m3ndez, @mysaviorfalsegod

[anhed-nia]

IN A VIOLENT NATURE

This weekend I managed to catch two movies that are uh, you know, modern deconstructions of old horror tropes, and I found that I liked the cheaper, dirtier, less obviously "classy" one a lot more. Thea Hvistendahl's adaptation of John Ajvide Lindqvist's (LET THE RIGHT ONE IN) novel Handling the Undead leans hard on grief, trauma, and family drama in a story set during a zombie plague; unfortunately the zombie subgenre has been rife with grief, trauma, and family drama since around 1968, and as Hvistendahl's movie seems rather unintrigued with its own outlandish premise, the whole thing feels like a foregone conclusion at best, and a gimmick at worst. (This movie is only just out but I'm bracing myself for the reviews that will call it a fresh and sophisticated take on a lowbrow stereotype, and I am begging the world to stop saying that "elevated horror" is a new and novel phenomena, it is certainly neither of those things. Ahem) Meanwhile Chris Nash, a Canadian FX guy, has made his feature debut using a very gimmicky-sounding premise: IN A VIOLENT NATURE is a FRIDAY THE 13TH clone that follows the perspective of the marauding slasher instead of the final girl and her unfortunate friends. What could easily be a one-note, one trick pony is instead an unusual and oddly beguiling daydream that, in spite of its aesthetic focus, manages to make the primitive films it riffs on feel more plausible than usual.

IN A VIOLENT NATURE concerns "Johnny", a familiar-sounding "slow kid" who was killed during a cruel prank and who now stalks the forest as a vengeful zombie. (It has always felt awkward to call Jason Voorhees a zombie, maybe because "zombie" implies something anonymous and impersonal, but for the sake of conversation...) When a gaggle of horny, drug-doing campers witlessly steal Johnny's beloved mother's sweater locket, he tears them apart one by one in search of the precious artifact. We watch over Johnny's hulking shoulders as he plods from one victim to the next, and the effect is often mesmerizing. The film's lack of a musical score seems like a perverse gesture at first, but it's wiser than it may initially appear. The purpose of slasher movie music is usually to convey unto the viewer the hero's or victims' feelings of terror. FRIDAY THE 13TH is the worst day of Alice's life, and the music tells you this--but the protagonist of IN A VIOLENT NATURE is the killer, and for him it's just Tuesday. It would be too much to say that the film is exactly sympathetic to Johnny, but the naturalistic presentation of his misadventure creates a far different emotional atmosphere than what the viewer is accustomed to.

What's really unusual about this film is not just that it is shot from the reverse angle--identifying us with the killer's experience in an amusing realization of exactly what Mary Whitehouse and Roger Ebert were afraid of--but that it otherwise sticks to the traditional slasher movie tropes so faithfully. One finds no pompous "elevated horror" ambitions here, only the familiar narrative cliches, "bad acting", and absurdly elaborate kills. And this is all a good thing! If the filmmaker had decided to just defy all of the usual expectations...well, let's just say that the approach of "doing the opposite" creates its own kind of predictability, and at worst it can become pointlessly contrary and contemptuous of the material to which a movie is supposedly paying homage. Instead of trying to prove that he is better than his roots, Chris Nash honors the high artificiality of the prototypical slasher film while at the same time injecting it with a disarming naturalness. The result is often fascinating.

With all that said, don't expect perfection. The experiment here is ultimately very simple, and though the film is not long it does tend to overstay its welcome, particularly when it breaks its own rules and follows the final girl's perspective just to get the story across the finish line. However, IN A VIOLENT NATURE is so playful and earnest that it's hard not to like--proving once again that being interesting is often better than being great.

[rawliverandgoronspice]

Thoughts on TOTK Ganon's appearance?

A lot of them!! Some would say: too many!!! Too much!! So much so that I was almost starting to turn this ask into a TotK early review, so I'll simplify my answer a little.

I have not finished the game yet, but I have seen the memories and a good chunk of it, but my opinion is therefore incomplete and subject to lapses in judgement/hasty positions. Also, my opinion on this is kind of a buzzkill and I already made people depressed and bummed out by explaining it, so I'm putting it under the cut to avoid hurting the good time of people who might not want to think about this/might disagree on this description alone (and I understand, since it's an opinion that also depresses me!!! I wanted to like everything!! I wanted to be blown away!!).

I think this Ganondorf is like OoT Ganondorf redux, but with even more problems than OoT Ganondorf, somehow??? which is honestly a flex at this point.

(I love OoT Ganondorf to be clear, but the flaws are pretty undeniable and you have to navigate through a lot of bullshit to get to the good parts)

Between the green skin that lacks any proper justification in the context of the game (I say this because I always hear "oooo but it's because he's a demon/undead" and uhhhh no, it's not because of that apparently), the fact that he's half naked but we're never ever meant to conceive him as a human person in any way but merely as a constant physical threat... Like I'm certain the famous Ganondorf Designer did their utmost to give him justice and there is an obvious attention to details in his design, and I'm not blaming them or anyone in particular for the Nintendo treatment --but it does add up to something quite uncomfortable in his characterization regardless. Even the fact that his face rigging is extremely flimsy and makes his emoting feels super strange bugs me (I heavily suspect it's because it's way less soft anime and structurally very different from any other face in the game, especially around the jaw, and so they had to do a custom rig and had to work around its limitations --it's all speculation, and I am always here for Unsettling Ganondorf Faces, but it kinda felt accidental and not intentional like in WW or TP). He's at once a lot and really not much. I find his characterization beyond barebones. Even Twilight Princess Ganondorf had more to him than this (like the man was fascinating in comparaison, show me a guy claiming to be chosen by the goddesses while sitting on a throne next to the decapitated statues of said goddesses any fucking day over what we got here)

I like the mechanical aspects he introduces; the gloom is cool, the hands that grab you are amazing, the bosses are such cool callbacks --and he's just causing messes and putting parasites in things!!! You go girl. I do love that he's having his little puppet Zelda run around causing hijinxes, that's very fun of him and my favorite part of his character in this game so far, tho I don't know if that even counts as him --and I'm not 100% sure what that even says about anyone?

But here's the thing: nobody (beyond * arguably * Rauru) seems to be allowed to have a character arc in this game, so it's hard to come up with anything to say since he's the sole cause of conflict while being almost completely motivation-less. I don't think anyone is written particularly competently honestly; it just shows more with him because a Ganondorf who's not well written reverts back to Ganondorf at his most generic expression of a baddie imaginable, with a side-serving of, quite frankly, really questionable orientalist themes that I see little excuse for being handled the way they were in the year of our lord 2023. Like I'm kinda shocked not to see more people calling the racism for what it is, because it's... pretty blatant. But that goes beyond Ganondorf and that's the whole game, and I said I would try to keep my scope limited, but!!! I will screech about imperialism eventually!!!

The other aspect of that discussion, which is inevitable, is how much does TotK erase everything that came before? I'm sure there are some amazing Zelda theorists out there who will find a way to reconcile all of this, but for now, I get the sense that Nintendo wanted to get away from their messy timelines (fair) and reinvoke some of the old songs for a new audience, and in doing so scrubbing the slate clean. My problem is not so much that they wanted to do this (even if I think BotW's solution was, strangely, much cleaner and more respectful of their own history), but what they introduced instead: and, in Ganondorf's case, he's kind of reduced to a parody of himself --one that is so unbelievably unsympathetic and impossible to relate to and also responsible of his own oppression and also not oppressed since he attacked first!! and also oppressive?? (I made A Sound when I heard the line about Rauru talking about "the last free gerudo village falling" bitch!! free according to whom??????)

Removing a lot of the Goddesses/Triforce thing (so far, maybe it will come up) also does this conflict zero favors in my opinion, as it makes everything and everyone's actions much less fated and an expression of self-determination/resilience over their predestination, and much more uhh political in a bad way, while still borrowing the aesthetics of divinity to justify its own mind-numbing moral simplicity.

I don't know. Maybe the third act reveal will really surprise me and make me reconsider my position, but it would take a lot to scrub off all the dedicated efforts made to flatten Ganondorf to his lowest possible denominator (him and his people honestly my follow-up to the gerudo post will probably be Oops! All Salt) for the sake of the most brazenly imperialistic and feudalist Hyrule to date and its really weird and uncomfortable reimagined origin story.

So uhhh, Thoughts Bad! I guess thoughts bad. :(

(Matt Mercer did a great job with what little he was given tho, and so did every voice actor)

[linuxgamenews]

Immerse Yourself in the Gothic World of Vampire Therapist

Vampire Therapist dark story adventure game launches now on Linux, Mac, and Windows PC. Thanks to the creative minds at Little Bat Games. Available now on Steam and GOG with 100% Positive reviews. Ever wonder what the undead worry about? How they handle immortality? And what would a 3,000-year-old vampire do besides hang out in a gothic nightclub in Europe? These burning questions and more get answered in the Vampire Therapist dark adventure. This fresh new Linux game is the brainchild of Cyrus Nemati, who also stars in it. Joining him are voice actors like Matt Mercer from Critical Role. There is also Sarah Grayson from Hades 2, Francesca Meaux from Hades, and newcomer Kylie Clark. They bring a bunch of eccentric vampires to life in a way that’s both hilarious and heartfelt. Launching the dark story adventure of Vampire Therapist puts you in the boots of Sam. A cowboy from the Old West looking to change his murderous ways and reconnect with his soul. On his quest for answers about his immortality, Sam travels to Europe and meets Andromachos, a reformed assassin, warrior, and undead heartthrob. Under Andromachos's (bat)wing, Sam learns that being dead doesn’t mean you can't live.

Vampire Therapist dark story Launch Trailer

Together, they help other blood-sucking immortals realize they can still enjoy life, even in undeath. And the best part? The therapy techniques used in the game are designed with the help of real licensed therapists, giving it an authentic and meaningful touch.

Real Therapy Concepts: This teaches and applies real cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) concepts. You'll also challenge vampire clients' statements filled with "cognitive distortions." Due to help them see where their thoughts are out of whack.

A Comedic Journey Through History: You'll meet emotionally damaged vampires from ancient Greece, Renaissance Italy, Tudor England, and the Bronze Age. Inspired by shows like What We Do in the Shadows and Horrible Histories. The title also mixes comedy with deep, introspective themes and heartfelt characters.

An All-Star Voice Cast: The features some top-notch voice talent. Cyrus Nemati (Hades, Pyre) and Francesca Meaux (Hades). Sarah Grayson (Gone Home, Hades II), Kylie Clark, and Matthew Mercer (Critical Role, Baldur's Gate 3) all lend their voices to the cast.

Unique Setting: Vampire Therapist blends cozy self-introspection with a dark European goth vibe. The whole adventure takes place above a goth club in Germany. Complete with plenty of willing necks to bite!

Fun Minigames: Learn mindfulness meditation and safely, consensually bite some sexy necks in engaging minigames.

Created with love by solo developer Cyrus Nemati, Vampire Therapist promises a unique journey through the dark psychology of vampirism. Due to leave you changed forever.

Why You Should Play

Vampire Therapist isn’t just another dark adventure title. It’s also a mix of therapy and fun, all wrapped in a quirky, undead package. It offers a hilarious and touching look at what it means to be immortal and emotionally complex. Whether you're into deep stories or just looking for a laugh, this title has something for you. Plus, the CBT techniques you’ll learn might even help you in real life! So, if you're ready to explore the minds of ancient vampires, laugh at their antics, and maybe even learn a thing or two about your own thoughts. So jump in, help some vampires, and have a blast! Get ready to sink your teeth into Vampire Therapist, the dark story adventure launches on Steam and GOG. Priced at $14.99 USD / £12.79 / 14,79€. Along with support for Linux, Mac, and Windows PC.

[theheightofdishonor]

there were so many trailers that I just wanted to jot down thoughts

ossan's love- I never got into the og, never got into the remake, it's unlikely that i'll watch this unless it has glowing reviews after it ends and maybe not even day

leap day- it looks interesting but also looks bad so we'll see. I love a good symbolic pair but day/night combo has been soured for me due to last twilight. Gun looks like he'll be good. Dew gets a lot of lead roles for someone that I don't think is a good actor.

the heart killers- awww firstkhao getting their romcom! after this, imma need them to do some individual projects though. They're too good to only get pair projects. joongdunk looks fine, casting joong and khao as brothers should be fun.

friendshit forever- I was so intrigued when I thought this was a gl and then far less intrigued later. GMMTV needs to give pat her gl like yesterday. I hate this hair on Boun but i'll still be watching this.

perfect 10 liners- I heard this was 30 eps??? gmmtv clearly has too many actors and pairs then they can handle. still waiting for perthchimon to get a decent story, will not be watching unless I hear its good after it ends.

us- this looks excellenttt. I am cautiously optimistic and hopefully, i'll be over my precious enough that I can appreciate coming of age romances again by the time this airs. The pair looks great, Sing also looks great, i'm definitely watching

Hide & Sis- after the mess that was the jungle, I was ready to nope out of this and then they showed Piploy. No clue if it's good but i'll be watching. Hopefully, it'll be more psihy and less the jungle.

Thame- Po -i do have a weakness for idol romances so watching, yes, the rest of it is unimportant

break up service- reminding me of midnight motel, looks fine but not enough that i'm going to watch it

revamp the undead story - ik I'm out of the loop but I am still surprised that they're already announcing this project. how I feel about it remains to be seen but this is boum's dream production so i'll watch for him if nothing else. Oh actually, one thought- why the fuck did they do that to santa's eyebrows?

sweet tooth, good dentist- I'm delighted to see Mark be the lead. They'll be compelling just because it's ohm and mark and also mark's shown us all year that he can have good chemistry with anyone. Will be watching but am a taddddd bit disappointed that it's such an idk, basic role.

The Dark Dice- didn't expect Gemini to get a solo show, it's wonderful to see Prim again but this looks like Jumanji in a high school setting, skip

The Ex-Morning- clearly written for this specific pairing, the chemistry looks better than sotus but i'm ambivalent on singtokrist so idk yet if I'm going to watch. Currently a skip for me

Scarlet Heart Thailand - It took entirely too long for me to connect this to the kdrama but officially what i'm most excited for. However, this only works out if Nanon's Wang So and Win's Wang Wook in which case it'll be excellent. if Win's Wang So, i'll still watch but I won't be happy about it. Either way, the casting looks absolutely fantastic and thought out. Tu's going to be perfect as Hae Soo.

[solarsonicsoda]

Wrestlemania Main Event Reviews - Wrestlemania 13

The Undertaker def. Sycho Sid (c) in a No Disqualification Match for the WWF World Championship in 21:19

Pre-match promo from Sid, he goes from yelling to inaudible, and when you can hear him he barely makes any sense! Here’s Taker, and even in full-on undead mortician mode his entrance is a spectacle! I like Undertaker’s little face paint tear. HBK’s on commentary. Sid comes out and is giving fist bumps but I assumed he was a heel. Sid gets the Sid pyro which is always cool. The two big men square up but here comes Bret Hart! Bret is here to yell at HBK, who Vince McMahon comforts it seems. He also yells at Undertaker and Sid, who laughs and looks around when Hart addresses him, which is funny. He then hits a powerbomb on him to shut him up. Taker attacks Sid as he yells at Bret and hits a lot of strikes and a big splash in the corner. The ring is very stained from I presume Austin vs. Hart earlier. Taker hits Old School and he’s all over Sid to begin until he catches a corner splash with a bearhug. He goes to a knee with it and I still think these bearhugs look rubbish. HBK talks on commentary and gets a picture and picture, but that’s ok with me because this bearhug is still going on. Taker breaks free but Sid locks it in again. Taker comes off the rope into a big boot and then Sid launches him over the ropes, but Taker brings him out under the bottom rope. Sid throws him into the French announce team, then drops him on the barricade and the table. He slams him against the post, rolls in for a cover, but kick out. Taker and Sid go back and forth and Sid locks in a camel clutch. Sid goes middle rope and hits a double axe handle but Taker then mounts a comeback. Sid reverses into an Irish whip and then a powerslam. He backs up with a big leg drop but no successful pinfalls. He’s trying a lot! Squeezing Taker’s face into the turnbuckle, then Taker is able to come off the ropes and hit a leaping clothesline, but Sid is still up first. Attack in the corner but Taker flings him through the middle rope and then over the barricade. They brawl back and forth on the outside and back on the inside Taker misses a big elbow drop. Sid locks in a chin lock on the mat. Taker gets out with some big shots and uppercut, then as Sid comes off the ropes, he hits a big powerslam, but Sid kicks out. Shoulder claw from Taker but Sid gets up and breaks free. He goes for a low-effort big boot off the ropes, but Taker catches, spins him, and hits a clothesline. Double big boot and both are down. Sid crawls over for the pin but kick out. He hammers down on Undertaker with multiple middle rope attacks, but again Undertaker kicks out. On the third attempt, Taker reverses, but an eye rake and powerslam halts Undertaker. Sid goes top rope but Taker sits up and crotches Sid. Biel throw off the top, Taker heads up top and hits the diving clothesline, but Sid kicks-out. Taker signals for the Tombstone but Sid counters, though he only gets 2! He throws him out through the middle and brawls outside but Taker gets the choking hand on Sid. However, Bret Hart attacks Sid with the steel chair, Taker looks annoyed but slams him into the post. Chokeslam in the middle of the ring but Sid kicks out. Taker is thrown into the ropes, gains speed, but Sid ducks the attack. Sid signals for the powerbomb, Hart comes up on the apron, Sid attacks him but walks into a Tombstone Piledriver for the win! New champion! And it was a very slow count too! Taker looks great with all the pale makeup worn off. He poses to celebrate. 

Pros: Good brawling action, high impact, big win for the Undertaker Cons: Bret’s involvement makes Taker look kinda weak?

Fine match! Fun brawl but nothing that particularly catches the eye, Taker is class but nothing out of the ordinary. The Bret Hart involvement felt a little unnecessary past the opening segment, especially him coming back twice, but it’s not the worst thing.

3 STARS OUT OF 5

[muertarte]

PARTIES: @muertarte @ronin-for-hire

SUMMARY: Fang is staking out MuertArte for a job and sees her target, Metzli, taking care of a forger. She moves in for the kill.

TIMING: Current

WARNINGS: None

People talk about monsters being frightening to look at it, and it’s a lie. Monsters aren’t frightening to look at. They just look like everyday people, like friends and family, like classmates and professors, like a painter or an art gallery owner, more ordinary than any would like to believe. Of course, Fang was thinking about the spooks that are able to wear ordinary like a mask to hide their true form, that of a hungry predator, of a senseless violent beast. 

When her current employer first approached her with the job, Fang was confused. He sounded more furious that the target crippled his business by killing one of his best forgers than he was furious that the target was a monster and could come after him next. Not all men were born with intelligence, obviously, and by men, Fang meant the entire boring race, not just the inferior half of a closeminded suburban elderly housewife’s ideal relationship. But Fang digressed.

She has been watching her target, the gallery owner, for a couple of days now, and so far, no incident. Fang was almost in the mind to drop the damned thing, but she heard a tiny voice in her head, that of her late mentor, that they never drop jobs. They see them through. At least up to the point where they can confirm its authenticity. Was the gallery owner an actual vamp? Or were they just being targeted by forgers? That was what she needed to find out first.

The week had gone and went, for once behaving. And by that, it only meant that Wicked’s Rest hadn’t thrown ungodly curveballs that Metzli couldn’t catch, or even a single forger for that matter. It was strange, as they were usually a weekly occurrence. But that was fine. Patrons visited and enjoyed their time, even conjuring a few positive reviews for the gallery’s page. All in all, Metzli couldn’t complain. Not that they did anyway.

Surviving was all they could ask for, was all they needed. Years of believing it was better to have a little of something than to have nothing, that having aspirations made one take up too much space was deeply ingrained in Metzli. Complaining was futile. Weak. It was much better to go along with the direction and power the waves came. It was easier. Made surprises that much sweeter when they arrived.

So when a forger came in, at last, Metzli was more than happy to take the opportunity. They took a few liberties, forcing a chase to ensue toward the woods when the burly man made his way to his car, late at night. With the cover of darkness, they felt the embellishment for fun was justified. There was a whole week of monotony to make up for, and a hunt was the perfect treat.

Fang stalked her prey like the predator would its meal. She kept her distance, made sure she couldn’t be felt or seen, even as her only true protection was the oni facemask that concealed her identity. She’s fought, and killed, so many of them now that she knew they also had their tricks. But she had to fast, and she had to make sure she wouldn’t lose them. Otherwise, she wouldn’t get paid in full. It was all that mattered to her these days. Getting paid. What else was there? The slayer had neither a past nor a future. There was only the present. There was only this hunt.

So, she waited for the perfect opportunity. She waited for her target to finally kill a man, to confirm itself as part of the undead plague. It would’ve been horrifying to kill an innocent soul. Or at least in paper it was. Fang no longer believes in such a thing, innocent souls. Outside of the children, everyone has already done something that tainted their souls. But she didn’t deal in souls. She only handled the things that didn’t have them, the monsters in the dark, the boogeymen that slaughtered the weak and helpless and the occasional asshole. Still technically helpless in the fangs of a predator.

Fang could just save the burly man, intercept the attack, but that wasn’t the job. The job was to eliminate the vampire. If the man had to die for Fang to confirm her target, he would. There are no more innocent souls, and Fang was a firm believer that death was more of a respite from the pains of life than an actual punishment. After all, this world is already done for.

The heavy gait of the forger didn’t give him much of a chance. He wasn’t in the shape to run, his body built for immediate confrontation. Which, he was given the opportunity to stand and fight. He didn’t have to sprint away. Metzli supposed that was just nature playing its part. Instead of fight, the idiot chose flight. 

All common sense left him and now he was going to face death. A slow one at that. He could beg for his life, plead for someone to help, but all he would receive would be his own voice ricocheting from the trees. It was a fun song that led the dance, but it was coming to an end. Closing in on the man, Metzli surged forward, colliding their bodies together in a roll that ended with the vampire above him. They hissed above him, a predator a breath away from its prey. Metzli wasted no time in sinking their teeth into in, letting the blood pool on their tongue and slip down their throat. It was a good kill. It was a good night, filled with screams that slowly faded to silence. 

There it was. The confirmation that Fang needed. She took another moment, a few seconds more, and watched as the vampire fed on the hapless idiot. Biting? Check. Bleeding? Check. Screaming until the victim fell unconscious or probably even died? Check. With all those bullet points and more checked in her head, the slayer rushed out of the shadows and attempted to pierce the vampire through the back of the neck, where its spine connected itself to its skull, for a quick and clean finish.

Or so in theory that should happen. Fang has tried this technique before and it never went according to plan. She wasn’t yet sure if she needed to be faster or quieter, but every time she did it, the vampire, her quarry, would always find a way to survive the strike. It was a technique she’d seen her late mentor master, though because their quarry back in Japan were much larger and heavier, it could never kill with one blow. Here, Fang thought it would. Rather it should. She wasn’t able to fully master it before her mentor’s untimely passing. She wasn’t able to fully master a lot of things before the old man was taken from her. “Die, monster!”

The bliss that came with feeding on a fresh kill tended to be overwhelming. All senses quintupled and too much to acknowledge much else. But a predator’s instinct always won out. The need to protect the kill that was rightfully theirs caused the hairs on Metzli’s neck to rise when the earth was audibly disturbed and their would-be attacker announced themself. Horrible tactic, they thought. Perhaps an amateur hunter doing their duty or a noble citizen trying to do what they considered to be what’s right. Either way, Metzli countered quickly. 

Metzli swiveled in their heel, slamming their leg into their attacker. Quickly, they pushed them away, dirt dragging into a trail. Metzli followed it, pouncing onto the stranger and trapping her beneath them. They pressed down on her throat for a few moments before they released her and grabbed her by the ankles. With a yank, Metzli threw the woman several feet away from them, hoping to get some sort of distance for them to assess and maybe get the person to leave before something had really happened. 

“Leave or die. Have job to do.” They hissed, crouching in preparation for the woman’s answer. 

“Yeah?” Fang growled with that deep Batman voice, another mask to keep her civilian identity out of the paranormal community’s grasp. She hadn’t referred to the voice as such, but this town has changed her so much. Back then, back in Tokyo and Osaka, it was just a failsafe, another tool, another weapon, with which to confuse and destabilize the monsters that lurked in the night, their occasional societies and get-togethers. Now, after watching all the Batman movies Sara had, including the one with the vampire guy, it was a paltry attempt at Christian Bale’s version. “Well, so do I!”

It wasn’t enough that Fang was unintentionally cosplaying the Dark Knight. When the vampire threw her, she did a damned flip and ended up doing an even damner superhero landing. For a moment or two, she just stayed there, kneeling on one knee, eyes narrowed at the opposite direction of where the monster was. All that was just further proof that she needed to end it. Before anyone else got hurt. Or more importantly, before it could run and deny her this month’s rent.

Fang bum rushed her quarry, feigning a direct thrust with her katana against the vampire’s chest, only to instead quickly deliver a slash on their leg. It wouldn’t do much damage. With how recent the creature has fed, it wouldn’t take them that long to heal. But that was the problem with these creatures: Being able to heal fast makes them forget to stop until they get put down. “Someone wants you dead. Someone with enough money to pay my rent.” 

Well, the gruff voice was unexpected from a woman so small in comparison to the vampire. Not to mention the getup she sported to fight. Metzli couldn’t help but wonder for a moment if she was trying to be one of those underwear people they saw in books. She wasn’t displaying the colorful garments like they normally did, so they had to gather she wasn’t. Though, she definitely had the acrobatics to be one. 

Metzli quirked a brow and made a mental note to warn Honey about the woman and her antics. “Urgh!” Especially if she had a pinche katana. The slice to Metzli’s leg forced them to their knee, but they had enough resolve to get back up and retrieve one of their knives. If she wanted blood to shed, then so be it. Metzli would paint the ground. 

Carefully, they watched the woman zip around them and blabber on about having to pay rent. Is that all this was? A job? Metzli scoffed a little, just barely relaxing their defensive stance. Inhaling slowly, they found an opportunity and threw their knife, meeting their mark to the nuisance’s shoulder. “If all you want is paid rent then I can pay rent. Am doing my job by getting rid of idiot like him. Not my fault he choose wrong job.”

Without making a sound, Fang winced as cold steel penetrated her flesh. She tried to lessen the weapon’s impact by moving her shoulder back, not unlike a reed against strong winds, but knives weren’t like punches or kicks. Knives don’t just bruise. Knives make you bleed. Instinctively, she squinted at the vampire, clenching her jaw. She should have expected the creature to have a weapon, but knives? She expected more of the same, those grotesque but deadly fangs and maybe even the sharp nails of a familiar monster back in Japan.

But this was not Japan. And Fang could not hate the monsters of this other land as much as she hated the monsters that took her parents from her. She’s made enough of them bleed, took out as many of them as she could in Tokyo and Osaka. These things, the creatures of her new home, her temporary place of residence, they’re not the same as the ones she was taught to loathe. These ones, some were made, not born, and as much as Fang didn’t like them, she didn’t like their hunters either. She was, in every sense of the word, an equal opportunity hater.

“Go on,” Fang indulged the creature’s implied truce, a negotiation that she would have been wary long ago. Her mentor taught her never to trust monsters, but that was before she left to track down his killer, only to fail when her quarry was already taken care of by a local hunter. Most likely why she never got along with the local hunters of this town. They took her vengeance albeit unintentionally and now she was stuck here. Besides, as much as it was a terrible decision to backstab her employer, that guy did smell like rat piss. “Why are you…getting rid of those idiots?”

It was supposed to be just a simple job: Slay the monster, get paid, pay the month’s rent. But the monster didn’t seem like it was just feeding indiscriminately. It didn’t seem like it was just mindlessly satiating its innate thirst for violence and suffering. There seemed to be more bubbling underneath, and frankly, Fang was a little curious and a little more eager not to keep her routines monotonous. 

Even more surprising than the vigilantism, the woman was actually hearing Metzli out. Annoyed as they may be, they understood how it looked. Had they been a worse vampire that night, attacking anyone for a meal, Metzli knew they would have met their demise. Fortunately for them though, there was more in their current kill than just a meal. 

“Run gallery business. This idiot,” Metzli waved over at the dead body, “Thought he could fool me with a fake Rembrandt.” They scoffed and shook their head, absolutely annoyed with the idea. The fact anyone produced fakes irked Metzli to their core. Art was sacred, and worse, there were always seedier undergoings. Even they had to admit that forgery was the least victimizing. 

“Is not that much about money. Is annoying and if you look in his pocket, there is maybe phone or note with more things to do. Much worse than me.” Metzli relaxed at last and put their only hand up to signal a truce. “You leave me alone, I pay double and you no have to deal with body. How it sound?”

Wait, fake Rembrandt? Fang squinted as it slowly dawned on her that she might have been scammed, too. Her employer, that fat fuck, had paid her with a supposedly expensive painting as a downpayment, with the rest of the money to be handed after the job. The slayer didn’t know a lot about art, but for some reason, most likely because of the man’s job, she agreed with that proposal. That and she really needed to pay her rent. Fuck.

So, should Fang just kill this vamp and risk getting scammed further by a professional scammer? The slayer warily nodded toward the dead guy’s pocket and held out a hand, gesturing for the monster to give her the phone or note or whatever was in that pocket. She kept her eyes on the creature, just in case it tried to trick her. 

Fact was, however, her employer had already talked about forgers and stuff. Fang didn’t think much about it earlier since that was their business, but now that there was a much better offer on the table, despite it coming from a vampire, she found clarity in how these things always ended up, how deals with scammers always ended up. At least this vampire promised to clean up after itself. 

“Actually sounds like a good deal,” Fang mouthed the amount she was promised by her employer when a brilliant thought came to mind. “You want my employer’s address, too? Will cost you extra.” Loose ends and all that junk.

Finally, the vigilante gave the vampire some grace, allowing them to pat down the dead forger for whatever his to-do list was on. Finding a wallet and a phone, Metzli plucked them both away and handed them over, a look of I told you so painting across their features. They’d been in the game long enough to know how deep organizations ran. 

No one tried their hand at forgery without building up to it. You had to have some sort of money to try. If you wanted to make a decent fake at least. Not that even the best quality could get by Metzli though. Those idiots still died, much like the man at their feet.

“Okay, so deal.” But of course, there always had to be a catch. Money was always the constant motivator, but to the woman’s credit, she likely needed it for basic living if she was desperate enough to bite the hand who was feeding her. Metzli was just benefitting because she was being handed spoiled goods. They were just happy to get to the source of the filth, hopefully getting rid of them once and for all. 

“Fine. Pay extra for address. How much?” Metzli reached for their wallet and retrieved the max amount of cash they kept, which was five-hundred. “What I have right now.” They handed it over, “Am good on my word. Hate lying. So trust that I will pay you in full. Just need bill.”

“Huh,” Fang dropped the Batman voice but not the oni facemask that protected her identity. Well, at least that was the theory. She was pretty surprised, as she checked the wallet and the phone, to find that the vampire wasn’t lying. At the back of her head, she had thought it was just a trick, an attempt to distract her for the escape or the retaliation. But there was neither, and that proved to her that this business was better business than the one the lying piece of shit had taken to her. She felt very glad she used burner phones for this shit.

Without saying another word, Fang typed the address of her now-former employer on the phone and showed it to the vampire, but not before taking the five hundos. “Listen, this isn’t a threat, just a fact: I know where you live,”—well, she assumed the gallery was where the vampire lived, but she didn’t really care—“...but I’d rather not show up to your gallery thing unannounced and invade your privacy or shit like that.” It just wasn’t her thing. “It’s just not my thing. So, when would be the best time for me to show up announced and peacefully get my $400?”

Fang didn’t really give a shit about the dynamics of the local slayers and the local undead. This wasn’t her home. She was just staying here. At least until she finds a reason to go back home. Well, home was an overexaggeration. She had nowhere else to go to, nothing else to look forward to, except the daily grind at the shop and making the daily payments to live another day. Why the hell would she complicate things for herself by getting involved in local politics? 

“Also, as a side note, and this is for free: I’m pretty sure that guy has, like, three to four other idiots hanging out at his place. One of them doesn’t look like easy pickings,” Fang unintentionally squinted when she remembered the guy. He was pretty big but not too big, obviously athletic, probably had a military past or something that involved killing people as a career choice. “Don’t die before you pay me in full.”

Metzli blinked at the phone, which seemed like a threat despite her saying otherwise. Not a very good one either. “You show up unannounced and I punch you. Message my business and I tell you when to visit, idiot.” It wasn’t a harsh statement. More of a huffed suggestion an annoyed parent would give a child. “Not know how long it take to get rid of body, but you get money. Am not lying idiot like man who give you job.” Shaking their head, Metzli squatted down, took hold of their kill, and threw him over their shoulders in one swift move. 

How much more annoying could the woman get? First, she makes “non-threat” threats, then she tells them to not die while handling a few measly humans? Metzli was more than capable. Was that not obvious? “Not die, idiot. Can handle elder, can handle stupid human men.” They rolled their eyes, adjusting the body on their shoulder a few times before turning on their heel and walking away. 

“Not forget to message me.” Metzli called out, bodies disappearing into the darkness. “Will tell you when I kill your boss too.” 

If this was years ago, Fang wouldn’t have taken that glib insult lying down. She would’ve sliced the monster’s head off right then and there. But this was not Japan, the creature before her was not an entity with a grander existence, and her pride had died when she was too late to avenge her late mentor. A basic slight held no true weight over Fang. That and it seemed to be a consistent part of its language. Not unlike the word “bitch.” The American language can be so…complex. 

So, Fang simply nodded, stowing her katana back into its scabbard as she kept her eyes on the creature. “You’ll hear from me within the week,” that seemed doable, especially if the creature was confident enough to handle…an elder. There was zero concern from the slayer regarding the creature’s fate, as it’ll either succeed or Fang can collect her payment directly from its gallery. Chances were, her former employer would not survive it, and if it perishes during that fight, it would just be like hitting two birds with one stone. “Can’t wait to talk to you again.”

[simslegacy5083]

NSB (Straud Legacy) Gen 8 Ep. 158: Chief Lawbourne

Since Ash had let him know that the chief would likely self-destruct, Peachy was free to focus on preparing to step into leadership when she did.

With his behind-the-scenes knowledge of his boss’s erratic home life, Peachy saw her attitude at work in a new light. The unpredictable outbursts he had interpreted as personal disapproval was how she treated the whole department. Knowing it was some kind of condition she struggled with across the board actually made him feel a bit sad for her when she next flew off the handle on him in a meeting.

---------------------------------------------

Unfortunately for the chief, not everyone in the family was as patient and sympathetic as the current heir.

Grandy Jasper had caught enough of the conversations around the homestead to find out what had happened to Jack and was not the kind of sim who let foes make their own mistakes… not when they could be forced to make a much worse mistake with a simple Deliriate spell.

The undead villain literally ghosted through the precinct and stealthily ambushed the chief in the middle of her morning workout. No living soul noticed the spell or the gleeful cackle before Jasper returned to their love in the nether, pleased to once more have delivered magical payback.

---------------------------------------------

Finishing up her workout with a refreshing shower in the rain during the morning rush was not something the chief could easily brush aside.

Her very public breakdown, combined with the open secret around the precinct that she’d been getting progressively more unstable, resulted in HR escorting her safely and quietly away. Peachy suspected he knew exactly who had orchestrated that swift ouster. Nancy would surely not appreciate her puppet inviting scrutiny of her recent decisions, when any review had a chance of finding coverups that did not quite add up.

---------------------------------------------

With the commissioner being forced to act as interim chief during the search for her replacement, Peachy threw his plans into motion.

He marched into his boss’s old office and demanded to implement a carefully curated list of reforms. With foreknowledge of both the corruption issues and the imminent opening, he seemed much more prepared than the rest of his fellow police colonels to hit the ground running in her seat.

---------------------------------------------

Peachy’s move had been exactly bold enough, carefully calculated to appeal to both reformers and the powers invested in the status quo.

He returned home that evening officially the new Chief of Police and received a big bear hug from his proud husband. When asked how they should celebrate this win, Peachy knew exactly what he wanted to do to ring in this final promotion in his law enforcement career.

A few nights later they were back at the comedy club, Peachy having arranged to come and perform his newest set. His dream of trading handcuffs for applause was so close he could taste it.

-----------------------------------------

Want To See More? View The Full Story of My Not So Berry Challenge Here

[clevermird]

Review: Dead Beat (Dresden Files, book 7) by Jim Butcher

We’re now on book seven of the Dresden Files, and things show no signs of slowing down any time soon. 

Dead Beat sees Harry blackmailed into searching for a dead necromancer's research notes. If he finds them, the world (or at least Chicago) could be plunged into an undead apocalypse. If he doesn't, Murphy's career and reputation are ruined. If you know anything about Harry Dresden, you'll know what his choice will be. But he's not the only one looking for the book, and in order to survive, he's going to have to call on several new allies, not all of whom have his best interests at heart. 

This book continues to increase my respect for Butcher's worldbuilding and series-crafting skills. He skillfully uses the varying plots of each book to gradually introduce more elements of the setting, some of which go on to be important going forward, others of which are simply window dressing for the current adventure. The ever-increasing cast of characters is equally well-handled, which each book choosing one or two of the supporting cast to have their own day in the limelight. 

In this book's case, we learn a great deal about how necromancy works in the Dresden universe (culminating in one of the most badass and iconic moments of the series thus far - I knew it happened even before I started reading the series, although I didn't know the context). We also get development for some old friends and enemies and meet Captain Luccio, who I immediately decided I was fond of.

However, as many positive elements as this book had, I wouldn't say it's one of the stronger entries overall. Not the weakest, either, but definitely could have been better. There are a few reasons for this, but it all boils down to overcomplication. The series has always had "multiple plots crashing into each other" as a feature of its storytelling, but I think some of the additional complications and sub-stories in this one just added confusion rather than depth. 

This is most obvious in two places. First, there are three major villains in this book, but only two of them are interesting or memorable in any way and I think the story would have worked just fine with only them. Second, there is a subplot that, while carrying heavy implications for Harry and some of his choices from earlier in the series going forward, really would have fit better in a different book. I found that it didn't mesh with rest of the story that well.  

So again, if you're enjoying the series so far, there's no reason not to keep going, but not one of my favorites. Or maybe Blood Rites was just too hard to top. 

Rating: 3.75/5

[vampireclown82]

check out my newest blog entry containing reviews of In a Violent Nature, The Watchers, and Handling the Undead, plus ratings only for 3 other movies and 1 TV series...

#blogger #ilikemoobies #filmreviews #filmratings #inaviolentnature #shudder #thewatchers #ishananightshyamalan #mnightshyamalan #amshine #handlingtheundead #johnajvidelindqvist #enjoy #ornot

[dunwichhoarder]

Book Review: Island of the Dead

Brian Keene knows a few things about zombies, and this novel didn’t disappoint. It’s like if Robert E. Howard had a George Romero movie marathon and decided to drop Conan the Cimmerian on an island filled with hordes of giant insects and ravenous undead. It’s a quick and fun sword-and-sorcery adventure.

The main character, Einar, is a badass straight out of the pulps. He's strong and grim, but with just enough humor to keep him from being a Terminator.

I wish the book had been longer because I want more time in this world. Thankfully, he seems to be planning a sequel.

As a bonus, it will annoy a certain breed of asshole who likes to complain about “woke” this and “woke” that in storytelling. Really? You can handle the idea of reanimated corpses feasting on the living but queer representation hurts your brain?