Mini vent feel free to ignore
NGL I've always been proud of my height(178cm/5'10) but damn if trying to read x reader fics isn't difficult... I'm never going to be small or petite and I dunno it's hard. Glad 1P gives me a taste of that with how ridiculously sized some of the guys are
No, I can appreciate those feels.
It's one of those things where I do try to make my readers as neutral as possible, but also like - I have been a full 5'00" since I was 12.
That's 30 years at this height.
There is probably a *lot* of stuff I write that unconsciously marks the reader as Short-SHORT without meaning to, because it's a default perspective for me. Now, granted, when I'm writing Kid, or Crocodile, or Doffy, these are BIG guys. Everyone is going to feel small, an Kid's not just big in a height sense, he's a BIG GUY.
I also avoid describing body types anymore than I have to, but I don't think I could write a specifically fat reader. I mean, *I* am fat, I am most certainly 100% Not Thin, or slender, or athletic in any capacity. But I mean, I'm also flexible, and I might have way more stomach than I'd like, but I can still lift the back end of an empty Prius.
To which, I just mean, fat doesn't equate to someone being fit or not, so even when I write a feisty reader, I don't *mean* to imply they're fit. Or not. I mean to try and leave it open to the reader themselves.
The hardest part of X Readers isn't just trying to make them as close to one-size-fits-all as you can, but also in understanding we all make assumptions on both sides of the equation. Writer and Reader both.
That said, representation is awesome, so I LOVE x reader stories that do get into some description. Black Readers, Fat Readers, [Insert Whatever here] Readers, Readers that are almost practically OCs.
In the end, the author should enjoy writing it, and the reader should enjoy reading it, and that requires a lot of work on both sides. Cause even self-indulgent writing is still a lot of work, and shifting through mountains of fic is also a good bit of work.
But, I do understand your frustration. I've heard a few people struggle with it... You know, I realize this is on anon, but if there's a story I've written that you've really enjoyed, if there's ANYTHING you want to take time to point out to me and say "this really implies smallness because in my experience x,y,z." I can't promise anything, but it wouldn't hurt either.
It'd be good education for me - learning about other people's experiences will always help me be a better writer. I've certainly experienced a lot personally, but I'll still only ever have my own perspective. I can't promise I'll write a specifically-tall-reader story, but it might help me pull my writing into more truly neutral territory so I'm not subconsciously just writing all I know.
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I understand you :( my relationships are all trash in real life, fiction is so comforting and so much better. They don't make you feel like real life people do. I can finally feel better when I'm reading or creating scenarios in my head. Living in real life and being treated like this is so hard and makes me want to give up. It's so tiring and I can't help but feel like maybe I'm too sensitive etc. I really hope we can feel better and find the right people (or even just one person) some day. <3
First off, thank you so much for reaching out, anon! I know this may not be the most appropriate way to put it.... but it's nice knowing that I'm not crazy or overreacting or alone.
On the other hand! I am truly, genuinely so sorry that you're going through similar circumstances ):
I don't think you're being sensitive at all. I think you've been extremely strong up to this point and have just started to feel the pressure from all of the negativity that you've endured thus far.
But please don't give up, anon! I completely understand if you don't feel comfortable reaching out off anon... but regardless if you stay anonymous or DM me, please know that I am always here for you if you ever need or want to talk.
I may not know you personally, but I do know how terrible and lonely it is to feel this way. And I don't want that for you, because you deserve better. You're worth more than that.
And while I may not be an expert conversationalist.... the least I can do is listen 💙
Also, you are 100% right about fictional characters providing so much comfort!
Like.... It might be sad to say, but I feel more love and care from playing/reading through Obey Me! than from the people I've known and have considered friends for the last few years. (Tbh, imagining the boys being real and all of the possible scenarios seriously does help me through each day lol)
Again, thank you for reaching out, anon. I really hope you feel better soon and things start moving in a positive direction for you. Because you deserve to be happy. You deserve to find people who will accept you, cherish you, and make you a priority in their life 💙
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excited and exhausted
reader x erwin, armin, sasha, hange, levi
description: reader playing the card game “excited and exhausted” with Attack on Titan people
inspiration: anonymous; requested: reader playing the card game excited and exhausted with erwin, armin, sasha, hange, levi
disclaimer/warning(s): nsfw; reader gender not specified so i tried to make it as gn! as possible but could be fem!-leaning?; hange is they/them; licking; lap dance
erwin
you inhaled deeply and bit at the inside of your bottom lip as you watched erwin’s large hands reach for the blue card. you licked your lips as he raised it to his eyeline, noticed the veins and ligaments and tendons in his hand and forearm from his tight hold.
the breathy exhale from his lips soothed your nerves, massaged out the breath you held. “lick your partner below to waist or drink once.”
the leap in your stomach acted without restraint, bubbled into a smile as erwin’s long arms were reaching for your thighs. he pulled you closer, moved one hand to cover your entire exposed calf and held it into the air, right near his face.
the hot breath travelled up the skin, spurred goosebumps and tiny hairs to stand at the sensation as it crawled towards your knee and down your thigh. erwin’s piercing irises stayed tethered to yours as he pressed the lightest kiss to the thin skin of your ankle.
with one hand rolling your cropped pants higher and the second grasped onto your thin ankle, he poked his tongue out, let the hot, wet textured organ slither and slide around the ankle bone, towards the dips in the muscles to your knee.
the red blush on your cheeks was encouraging as erwin’s hands found their way towards your upper thigh and hip, as his tongue reached the crook of your knee and he couldn’t help but sink his teeth into the soft flesh at the helpless gasp from your lips.
the reflex kicked your leg away from his grasp, but his hand instantly reached out, bringing your thigh back to his check and letting his mouth roam towards your crotch. you felt him smile through his open mouth at your melodic giggle.
“what else can i lick?,” he murmured against your upper thigh, the sentence tickling the sensitive thick skin. his tough arms wrapped around both thighs, held you close to his nose. he glanced up, winked cheekily, before letting his tongue explore your heated intimacy.
armin
armin’s cheeks were rouge when you pulled the card game from the bag, and the squirming ensued after reading the rules only exacerbated his mutual excitement and embarrassment at playing and exploring a side he kept hidden even to himself.
you went first, giggled as you noted how much more red armin’s cheeks were compared to the pink card. “take off one item of clothing or drink once.”
having the card near your face did you a disservice, because armin could visibly see the deep blush take settlement. he was about to speak, to tell you not to worry about it, to pick another card like the considerate, courteous gentleman he strived to be—but you had already dropped the card to the table and brought your hands to the hem of your shirt.
his breath audibly hitched, and armin blushed with hot blood as he covered his lap with his palm. he felt he should look away, but he couldn’t take his eyes off your bare chest, his pupils glued to the nipples matching his stare.
his mind was blank as you leaned forward slightly, as his eyes comprehended the closing distance between you. “your turn.” the hum of your voice was usually soothing, but right now it was grasping hold onto his skin, pulling him closer to you.
“i, um.” his pupils were scanning your torso, absorbing the detail to memory. the adam’s apple bobbed in his throat. “yeah.” he blindly picked up a new card, couldn’t spare any attention from you to mind the card. “stick your hand…” each word was slow, laced with a growing arousal. “in your partner’s underwear…”
armin felt his erection battling both his jeans and his palm, moaned slightly into the sentence at the sudden pressure from the growth. “for two minutes…” he finally made eye contact with you. “or drink twice.”
you smiled impurely. “by all means,” you murmured, lifting the band off your waist, raising an eyebrow suggestively. armin relented to the temptation, eagerly reached for you, drool poking onto his lip.
sasha
once the laughter softened and you watched sasha take a swing of her canned beverage, you picked up the next card. you inched your leg closer to hers, felt the heat colluding between.
“drink if you’re the best kisser,” you spoke softly, like raising your voice would break the moment. you made eye contact, coyly hid your face behind the blue card.
sasha smirked knowingly. “well,” she leaned in and lowered her voice, “i feel like—” the light pink hue on her cheeks made your heart flutter. you glanced at her lips. “—we need to compare first.”
she kept her lips pursed, a tiny smirk at the corners. you watched her irises flick to your lips too. sasha continued, ignoring her brown hair as it fell against her cheek, not worth sparing any attention from you.
“is that okay?” she asked you directly, her palm hesitantly hovering over your jaw. her pink blush and shy smile contrasted her confident question, and your lungs couldn’t bear the heat of the air shared between you. “can i kiss you now?”
the words were lost on you, and after a second you nodded. a nod so slight if sasha’s focus weren’t intently on you maybe she wouldn’t have noticed.
her hand collapsed onto your jaw and she lurched forward, practically moving into your lap as her lips met yours. time felt still as sasha surrounded your lap with her thighs, teasingly bounced and sucked the air from your chest.
as quickly as she kissed you she pulled away, the ghost of her lips a faint tingle, the heat from her proximity still stimulating the tissue. her forehead rested against yours, could feel her hot breath swirling with yours.
“you’re definitely better,” she whispered, the disturbance pushing air against the still tickled skin. she looked at you, cross-eyed from just how close you were. “but we should keep going…” her lips were brushing yours, the sensitive tissue tingling. “just to be sure.”
hange
maybe you were a little jealous of their glasses, for sitting so cleanly and nicely on their face, for the way they were constantly touching and resetting the wire to sit properly and comfortably.
hange pushed their glasses up the bridge of their nose and presented the card: “act out any sex position you want to try or drink twice.”
the bottom frame of the glasses covered the awkward blush, but the shy glance to the side was on display, accentuated by the lens. the lick of their lips turned into a bite to relieve tension, and you found yourself heating up and your heart beating faster at the idea.
their curiosity always got the better of them. “actually there is one i’ve been thinking about…” hange reached for your wrists before pausing, reflecting, and settled one onto your lower thigh instead, just above your knee. “may i?”
their sparkling eyes peaked over the frame. you nodded, breathed out, “where do you want me?” and sat up eagerly, body itching to be molded. their smile was enchanting, their addiction to exploration coming to life.
“on your back on the couch,” they answered, voice heavy, contrasting the light in their eyes. you heard a soft, “please,” as you rested back, swooned as hange’s hands rearranged your legs around their hips as they crouched over you.
you brought your hand to their cheek, touched the stem of their glasses to keep them from falling. you thought of closing the gap between you.
you tilted your head slightly. “you look nice like this,” hange complimented in an awkward boldness, flicked their attention from your eyes to your lips, “i-i mean, you always look nice, but—”
levi
levi insisted you read your card first. he brushed your forearm with two fingers absentmindedly as he stared around the room—felt too hot to look right at you.
you hid your face with your palm after reviewing the prompt. “give your partner a lap dance or drink once.” you reciprocated the lack of eye contact, found it hard to lift your stare from the card and redirect your attention from the rumble in your belly.
the shuffling and bending in the couch cushion brought your attention to the shifting body before you. the short man was starting to stand, the lifted weight off the couch making the cushion you sat on feel lighter.
then his hands were on your thighs, dragging you onto your tailbone and low back so your crotch was presented to the air. his firm grip dug into the undersides of your knees, pushed back until your kneecaps were above your shoulder blades.
your lips were parted, eyes just about quadrupled in size. “wh-wha— levi, i—”
his eyes were calm, soothed the nervousness at his sudden action. “baby,” he cooed, exhaled in amusement. levi leaned into you, nosing around your ears and neck as he brought one knee to the couch. “i’m just doing what the card said.”
your heart stopped beating as the blood settled on your skin once you watched and felt levi’s crotch rhythmically dip into yours, blushed furiously once his bulge barely graced your presented crotch.
“levi!” you squealed at the feeling of his tongue against your nape, closed your eyes because the sight was unraveling your guts and burning your insides. “it was my card!”
his shirt was discarded to the floor. levi took your hand and guided it to his savannah hot, sculpted abdomen. he thrusted his hips back towards yours, wiggled slightly for the performance factor, smiled widely as your fingers dipped into the ridges.
your hand stopped exploring his abs, stayed close like a ghost once levi’s beloved stare was demanding yours. he grunted with rhythmic grinds against your hip, spoke between exerted breaths and a naughty smirk, “oh, i was just obeying orders.”
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