#haven't had the time to analyze these two as much as I'd like

[aquillwieldingmagpie]

I don't know WHY, but for some reason I've had a vision of a Golden Ratio Slay the Princess AU.

I genuinely don't know why, maybe it's because of Ratio's owl motif and one of 2.1 quests being named A Cat Among Pigeons (in reference to Agatha Christie and possibly Aventurine's role) and then later owning three black cakecats even if he's mostly associated with peacocks? Maybe it's because I somehow associate Aventurine's many masks and personas we see over the time we know him with the Shifting Mound's many perspectives and how both her and him are so confident their respective foil won't kill or betray them at the end of everything (and are even fine with it if it does happen), how both the Princess and Aventurine always, always fight for freedom and are denied it until the very end of their story when they finally are granted a true escape through their own efforts and an outside force be it through being show the way or death? How they're both connected to a being so much larger than them but have no say over it (the Princess being seen as only a part/perspective of the Shifting Mound even if she can be found at her heart, Aventurine was blessed by Gaiathra Triclops and ultimately none of that did them any good).

Or maybe it's because I can practically hear this line from the Princess coming out of Aventurine's mouth to Ratio the more close he is to knowing who the real Aventurine is after I woke up in a cold sweat from a nap to write this out:

"Have you figured out what you want to do yet, or are you going to keep trying to find a center that doesn't exist?"

(The Princess saying this about herself and how she's the heart of the Shifting Mound and hasn't really been herself or stopped playing a role through the entirety of the game, but in this context Aventurine saying that there is no 'Kakavasha' or 'No.35' or even 'Aventurine' anymore, just the many masks he wears even though he admits to himself he hasn't changed)

I have no idea if this is anything though or if it would fit their characters at all though. Maybe it's just a silly vision I'll write out one day, maybe not.

[phantomyre]

It is time... to obsessively hyper analyze Vincent. Come on. You knew it was coming.

So first off, while there isn't a lot to glean per se, there are a few interesting design choices that I'd like to go over. One thing that I was surprised about is the complete lack of round shapes/edges. Vincent looks overall a lot more 'sharp', 'edgy', whatever you want to term it. Take his buckles for example. The round edges have been replaced by sharp edges. Artistically speaking, these design choices are meant to depict the character's personality. For example, if you have a soft character, you use soft colors, soft edges, round shapes, etc. If you want a more harsh character, you give them dark or vivid colors, lots of squares, triangles, etc. In Vincent's case, they've virtually removed all of the round/soft edges he always used to have. We will delve further into this as we scan down his body *cough*. Edit: Forgot to point out that he has double the spokes on his buckles, so instead of 4 prominent spokes, he now has 8, which is the symbol of Chaos.

Anyways.... speaking of Chaos.

Continuing to analyze his upper body, the most obvious are his eyes (or single eye). It's hard to tell, but judging by the few clips we've seen along with the still images, it looks as though only his left eye is glowing. Nevertheless, he does have the Chaos inner-glow. While he's always had a touch of yellow/orange in his eyes, it looked more like natural eye reflection rather than an actual glow. This is likely the change the dev team hinted at during an earlier interview. His pupils are also notably very small compared to all of the other characters with the exception of Sephiroth's cat-eye slits. Overall, they've made it a point to give Vincent predatory eye(s) this time around, leaning more heavily into the fact that he is no longer fully human. The material that makes up Vincent's cape and headband seem to be of slightly different material, and the colors are even slightly different. His headband looks to be made of a very thin cloth of fine thread. His cloak, though also seemingly thin and light, is only slightly thicker. His cloak looks to be made of either felt or very fine linen which looks to be heavily worn out (of course). Also, Vincent seems to have snake-skin on his gun-wielding arm which I've only seen the Turks and Sephiroth wear. In general, this luxury material seems to only be worn by those connected to Shinra. Thus, it is likely this is meant to coincide with Vincent's past as a Turk. But in terms of his role as Turk, I will get to that a little later.

I think we can all agree that the weapon he is currently wielding is Quicksilver. It would make sense that he would start off with the same weapon he has in OG, though I and many others were surprised he wasn't wielding his most iconic weapon, Cerberus. While it isn't confirmed, and with the inclusion of many DoC elements, this makes me think that we could get an origins story for how Vincent obtained Cerberus in the first place. We are getting an origins story for Sephiroth's Masamune in Ever Crisis, and we already know the Bustersword's origins, so it's not out of the question. (And there are a lot of parallels to be drawn between Cloud, Sephiroth, and Vincent). Side note: I didn't write this in the graph but you can also see Vincent's left eye glowing through his bangs yet again even from such a distance. Natural white room bounce-light wouldn't have this affect on normal eyes. Rebirth Vincent seems to be sporting his OG button-top which is a design that we haven't seen since OG. It too has a little bit of snake-skin accents. A few other not so important changes are the alterations of his buckles, and the fact that it looks to be more obvious that he is wearing a two-piece set instead of a single piece jumper. Makes it much easier to remove, am I right?

Going down to those luscious DoC hips, some belts are shifted around or missing, but then we have the thigh guard which was responsible for giving Vincent that unusually thick hip appearance. However, he is still sporting that gorgeous slutty tiny waist we all love from DoC. Thank you, Squeenix. The armor on his side is an odd choice, though more than likely it is meant to protect those birthing hips from that extra dangerous looking set of claws--- which I would like to remind is also lacking in round edges. Yet again, all of the round shapes/edges have been replaced by sharp ones. Take the knuckles for example. I will miss his AC/DoC claw. It was less of a bitch to draw. The gauntlet looks to serve not only for offense but for defense as well. It is heavily armored for impact, and as we will see going down the rest of his body, heavy protection and sharp edges continue to be a theme for his new Rebirth look.

Once again, we can see how thin and light the material is on his cloak. It is in contrast to his very elaborate and possibly expensive gear/suit. His cloak and headband seem to be the only things that clashes with the rest of his gear in terms of quality and practicality. While there are signs of use on his armor, it pales in comparison to the possible age and wear of his cloak. As a matter of fact, it almost looks like it is about to fall apart... like it was hand-made years ago. Very different from the heavy material we see in AC and DoC. And then of course there are the sabatons/greaves. While I cannot pin-point it, his armor design seems reminiscent of the Ancients/Minerva for some reason. That aside, the heavily layered armor makes it seem like he will be doing a lot more damage with his claw and legs going forward, on top of being heavily protected. The design on his shin reminded me of an army symbol, but that's neither here nor there. ....And I'm so happy they kept his tiny ankles. In general, Vincent's Rebirth design seems to lean into a Vincent that is much more guarded, 'edgy', and ultimately a lot more reserved, albeit self-reliant. We've seen as much in his room where it doesn't appear that he has only been moping in a coffin all these years. What's more---

--He points a gun at Cloud and threatens the group. This did not happen in OG. Vincent appears to be even more distrusting and hostile this time around. This yet again is depicted in how he is dressed in the heavy armor and ample sharp edges.

And what's with a vending machine and protorelic(?) dispenser in his mancave? Vincent boss fight, maybe? Please? Sure seems like Vincent hasn't been lacking anything... But back to Vincent being a lot more distrusting this time.

Unless this is merely for the audience and new FF7 fans who know nothing of his character, this implies that Vincent doesn't divulge his connection to the Turks and instead calls himself "Security" guard. And not only that, it's spoken as if it's current tense. Not past tense. So yet again, if Vincent is indeed avoiding the term Turk and doesn't even tell Cloud and Co that he used to work for Shinra, this adds to the idea that his level of distrust is much higher than before. At this point, it wouldn't surprise me if joins the party much later, even after learning who Cloud's foe is. And since his connection to Sephiroth aka Lucrecia/Hojo is the mystery factor, he may not even divulge this to Cloud and Co when they first meet until much later. Either way, Vincent might actually prove to be a much tougher egg to crack this time around, along with more layers to uncover. (take that last phrase however you'd like)

[raelle-writing]

I love how many people on here are always talking about who is and isn't doomed by the narrative in DFF like -

Are you sure? Because I've analyzed the hell out of this show and I cannot tell who is and isn't doomed by the narrative at this point. The story is too complex and nuanced and there's so many pieces of it moving at any given time.

Are Phee and Jin doomed by the narrative for betraying Non? I doubt it, because Non isn't the smiling little ingenue that people think he is. He's a character who has also made mistakes and fucked up, so idk if putting him as the tragic hero at the center of this tale makes sense. Like, of course he is the true victim of the show, but he's also way more complex than a tragic little kid. I know that people want Non to be that, and Phee and Jin to die because of it, but is it true? I don't think so.

Is Tee doomed by the narrative? You'd think so, and yet I feel like I've been seeing him move toward a redemption arc in recent episodes. I honestly can't tell if he'll live or die. He's not an irredeemable asshole because he loves White, and loves him so deeply that he'd rather die himself than bad things happen to White.

I don't think that anyone in DFF is obviously doomed by the narrative. They're all too complex and sympathetic for anything that simple and clear-cut.

That's not to say I'm positive Phee, Jin, Tee, or any of the others will live. It's impossible for me to say at this point because the show hasn't had a single high stakes death so far. I cannot tell how cut-throat the writers will be toward the end of it because we haven't lost anyone that actually hurt yet.

So far the deaths are:

The spoiled bratty rich kid (and we only found out that he was a more complexly sympathetic character AFTER he died)

The driver uncle who had 5 minutes of screen time total

The evil uncle who we all wanted to die anyway (and who was killed off-screen so far)

The narcissistic bully who has no backstory

They've killed four people and none of them hurt. The only reason Por's death hurt was because we got a moment of the characters mourning afterwards. We didn't get that with Top, and tbh I don't think I'd even care if we did because he's so flat. All of the characters who have actual nuance to them aren't dead yet.

I feel like DFF kind of sacrificed being a horror for the sake of being a mystery. It would've made for a better horror (in my opinion) to confirm Non is already dead in episode 8 and then work back toward a bloodbath. But instead of that, they've kept us in suspense for three more episodes without confirming if he's alive or dead.

I don't particularly mind that because I love a mystery, I just think that they'll have a hard time course-correcting back to a bloody slasher in the last two episodes after so much time spent in the past and on this mystery element.

I hope the show sticks the landing and doesn't throw away all of the interesting and complex writing and nuances built into it for the sake of a shocking ending, that would truly ruin it.

[shina913]

On Tilt, Part 6 | KNJ

On Tilt, Part 6

Definition: a poker term for a state of mental or emotional confusion or frustration in which a player adopts a suboptimal strategy, usually resulting in the player becoming overly aggressive.

On Tilt Masterlist

Pairing: Namjoon x Fem!Reader

Rating: M 🔞; NSFW

Genre: idol!AU; strangers-to-FWB-to-lovers; toxic relationship; angst; fluff; smut

Warnings: cussing; dirty talk; neck kisses; heavy petting; nipple play; clit play; body worship; oral (mutual); protected sex; switch!Namjoon; switch!reader

Word count: 5.6K+ words

Summary: You’ve said time and time again that you wouldn’t lose yourself to him. You were in control now. You were going to make better choices. For a minute there, you were able to keep up with it. It wasn’t ‘til Namjoon’s extended break that you found yourself falling into old habits. Will you ever learn to quit Kim Namjoon?

A/N: It's been a long time! If you're still following along, thank you for being patient! I hope to write more frequently. I haven't been inspired to finish much of my wips but I hope you'll enjoy this chapter! I've missed these two.

"I don't know... I think the second half of it seems..." Namjoon sighs, trying to think of an adjective. "Lame?"

"I don't think so," Jon, his co-producer, disagrees.

“Are you sure? I feel like we should add more to it. My vocals sound kind of flat.”

Namjoon, despite having 1,001 tasks to complete before his album release, had also agreed to do a feature verse on a track for one of his industry friends. He sits in one corner of the room, his gaze fixed on the large screen displaying multiple layers of squiggly waves that represent the various instrumental and vocal tracks he’s recorded.

Jon has worked with him long enough to know when he’s actually giving notes or just being nitpicky.

“Your vocals are fine,” he says reassuringly. “Your verse is perfect–it really fits the song!”

Namjoon sighs heavily, still feeling some apprehension. His phone buzzes and he glances at it to read a text message. “Ah, good. He’s on his way. Maybe he can give me some input on this. He’s got a great ear for these kind of things.”

“Ouch, bro,” Jon feigns offense as he cleans up the track layers some more.

Namjoon turns apologetic immediately. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just that we’ve been at this for a few weeks and I just want to get a different perspective?”

A minute later, the door to his studio opens, and in comes Yoongi.

"Hey, you got here fast!" Namjoon greets Yoongi. Yoongi nods in acknowledgment. "I was already on this floor when you texted, so I thought I'd swing by before my next appointment. What's up?"

Namjoon motions for Jon to play the track for Yoongi. He observes his teammate and frequent co-producer tilt his head to the side and close his eyes. He always does this when he wants to analyze the track by ear.

Once the track ends, Namjoon anticipates his comments.

“Can you try it without the cymbals in the bridge and drop the echo off the doubling track?”

Jon nods, clicks on a few functions, and plays the song according to Yoongi's notes. Hearing the track with the new modifications, Yoongi and Namjoon make eye contact. They both nod their heads enthusiastically to the beat. No other words are exchanged, but the smiles on their faces and the subsequent high-five provide enough reassurance.

******

“Thanks for the input, hyung. I appreciate it.” Namjoon walks Yoongi out of his studio.

“It’s nothing! We’re still a team even though we’re all off doing our own stuff at the moment.”

Namjoon silently agrees, then raises a hand to rub his eyes while trying to suppress a yawn. They pause for a moment, standing in front of each other in the quiet hallway.

“Tired?”

"I've accepted my fate of being tired forever," Namjoon laughs wryly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I don't know why I assumed that completing my album would bring me some relief and relaxation.”

"Ah, it'll pass." To a stranger, his deadpan tone might sound insincere, but Namjoon knows that he means it in a consoling manner. "Are you excited about your launch party?”

“Yeah, I am. And I’m taking YN with me!” There was a sense of pride and comfort in the way he said it.

Yoongi’s eyebrows shoot upward. “Are you?”

“You think it’s a bad idea?”

Yoongi shakes his head and smiles. “Not in the least bit. Have you told PD-nim?”

Namjoon nods. “He was cool with it. She’ll be there as my guest but we agreed that her presence there isn’t an ‘announcement’ or anything like that. Still, I’m confident that we’ll be safe since she and I will be interacting out in the open instead of sneaking around.”

It was simple logic. Photos weren’t worth much to tabloids if they were professionally taken with the subject’s consent.

Yoongi laughs at the rationale but he can’t deny that his friend makes a good point. “I’m glad you’ve got something worked out. And she’s okay with all that?”

Namjoon’s head tilts slightly and his shoulders shrug. “Apprehensive at first but I let her know that the front office was supportive so that helped convince her and made her feel safe about going.”

Yoongi’s eyebrows rose and his lips twitch upon hearing his last comment but he caught himself and managed to force a smile. “Good. That’s…good. I’m really glad to hear that.” It wasn’t fair to project his personal grievances with management toward his friend.

Realizing his misstep, his excitement is replaced with a pang of guilt. “Shit, I’m sorry, hyung,” he grimaces. “I didn’t mean to come off insensitive, especially after what happened to–”

Yoongi cuts him off. “Nah, don’t feel guilty about it. I’m happy that you’re happy. I’m glad that you have someone who supports you and that you’ve found ways to compromise.” His sober expression makes Namjoon’s face falter.

It hasn’t been long since Yoongi and his partner split up. It was a few weeks before the hiatus announcement but by then, they’d had enough and decided to move onto separate ways.

“I’m really sorry that you couldn’t figure out a middle ground between the label and–”

Yoongi waves his hand in mid-air to stop Namjoon from bringing up something that is still fresh in his mind. There was a time and place to be vulnerable but this moment wasn’t it. “S’okay. We tried…for a long time…” He sighs and finishes with a shrug, effectively dropping the subject.

“Anyway, speaking of PD-nim, what did you think of last week’s contract meeting?” Yoongi asks to shift the focus away from him. “Have you thought about what you wanted to do for the next year?”

Namjoon exhales and confidently answers, “Yep. I’m taking the option for the longer hiatus.”

A few weeks ago, the label held a meeting with all team members, offering different paths for their careers. They could either continue pursuing solo activities or 'take a break' by having a more flexible schedule and the option to choose the projects they want to participate in.

“Wow. Really? Even with all of the offers to collaborate?” Yoongi bulges his eyes out at his friend knowingly.

Two years ago, Namjoon would have been tripping over his feet if he ever got a call from his idols for a dream collaboration. Now that the group has hit record-breaking fame in the world stage, each member’s time was in high demand.

“I did that one song last summer with my idol and crossed that off my bucket list. I don’t need to be greedy by entertaining every request,” he laughs. “It’s also an opportunity for me to take a break and find a new sound.”

Although Namjoon's new album has not been released yet, Yoongi does not argue because he understands that as an artist, one needs to constantly evolve. As soon as you finish one project, you should already be in the midst of planning the next one.

“That’s fair,” Yoongi concedes. “Was this decision influenced by a certain someone?”

“Yes and no,” Namjoon admits. “She’s a factor but it's my own decision. It’s what’s best for me…for us. I owe it to her.”

“Is she collecting a debt?”

Namjoon laughs. “No, no. She didn’t say that. In fact, I haven’t told her that we had that meeting. All I know is that I made a commitment to her and I plan on sticking to it. Walk the walk, you know?”

“I guess it’s good that she didn’t talk you into it. The last thing you want is to make hasty, emotional decisions then regret them later.”

“Hyung, I swear I’m not being hasty or emotional about this.”

“Alright,” Yoongi relents. “Just saying, I’d hate for you to feel regret or resentment if things don’t pan out.”

The truth was, Namjoon had that thought buried in the far corner of his mind, but he wouldn't let it deter him. He believed that fate brought the two of you back together and he was determined to do everything he could to make the best out of this second chance. Things will work out this time.

They have to.

You're in a rush to send out two more emails before the holiday weekend. These emails are crucial for sealing the deals for two of your clients. One has received interest from a film production company that wants to buy the rights to their novel and turn it into a movie. The other client is preparing for wider distribution after self-publishing the first edition of their book.

Your phone starts to buzz after you send off one email.

“Hey, I just got here. Are you sure you don’t want me to pick you up?” Namjoon walks through your front door then pockets his keys, which include a copy of your house keys. It was a huge step for you and your relationship.

He was bringing food from the restaurant that you two were supposed to have dinner at. But after a client call ran long and a few other last-minute tasks piled up, you asked if you could reschedule. Instead, he was insistent and completely fine with the idea of spending the night in.

“I’m sure. I drove so I have to bring my car home anyway.”

“But you could leave it at the garage and I can have my manager pick it up tomorrow.”

You laugh at his offer. He just really wanted you home. “Why don’t you let the man enjoy a decent weekend off, for once?”

“Alright,” he relents. “I’ll be here waiting. I’ve got wine chilling in the fridge and pasta and chicken, just like you asked.”

You acknowledge all the effort he’s putting in. He’s been sleep-deprived the entire week but he was still determined to spend time with you. Still, you take the opportunity to tease him. “You know that kind of behavior will get you laid.”

“Look, I don’t really care if anything happens tonight,” he says simply. “I only wanted to bring dinner and be with you.”

“Mm-hm,” you hum in amusement. “What kind of pasta did you get?” You ask him as a test.

He answers with your favorite. It’s been so long and yet he still knew. “That’s it! I’m getting on my knees as soon as I walk through the door!”

A low laugh escapes him. “Not if I get you on your back first.”

His response makes you want to log off this second and rush home to him. 

Unfortunately, even if you leave the office, you still need to continue working from home. However, you would rather put 100% of your focus on him. So, you decide to stay until you finish everything.

Two hours later, you walk through the door. The room is dark and quiet, with the only light coming from the television. Namjoon is snoring in the living room.

He stirs when you brush his hair back to kiss his forehead from behind the couch.

"Hi," he says, his lips curving into a languid smile as he blinks his eyes open.

"Sorry, I'm late."

"It's cool." He stretches his arms and sits up. "Have you eaten?"

"No. Have you?" You ask him.

He shakes his head as well. "I'll heat up the food in the oven—"

"No, let’s go to bed so you can go back to sleep," you suggest. It's been a long day and fatigue is setting in. However, Namjoon gets up from the couch, shakes his head adamantly, and laughs. "You know that I know that there's no way you'll have a good night's sleep while hungry."

Just before you protest, your stomach growls, betraying you. He knows you well enough. With a snort, he takes your hand and guides you to the kitchen.

*******

After dinner and a quick shower for you, you get a second wind and decide to watch some late-night TV. It was a weekend, and Namjoon didn't have to be at the office until late the next evening.

He gazes at the week-old gardenia arrangement that he brought over when you first moved in and wonders aloud, "I'll never understand why you keep holding onto these until they're completely dead. Just throw them away and I'll get you fresh flowers!"

"I like them when they’re in this in-between stage of brown and white. They have a stronger scent and I love it," you explain.

"Yeah, but the aesthetic is—" He clicks his teeth in distaste.

"Forget about the aesthetic! I think it smells romantic," you say confidently.

At first, he furrows his brows at your strange remark. But instead of arguing, he’s endeared. He shakes his head and chuckles, returning his attention to the TV.

You and Namjoon are on the couch, watching old reruns of a show that you've seen many times before. Despite the outdated punchlines, you still find them funny years later. You're sitting sideways while your legs, covered by a throw blanket, rest comfortably on his lap. Instead of watching the show with him, your gaze is fixed on his profile. At the sound of a joke you both had heard before, he still lets out a guffaw, the corners of his eyes crinkling in amusement as if hearing it for the very first time. His laughter makes your heart swell so much that it feels as if you could float away.

At that moment, as his laughs subside and the scent of wilted gardenias fills the room, you utter, "I love you." You can feel your heart pounding in your chest.

He slowly turns his head to face you, his eyes searching yours. After a few beats that feel like an eternity, he says, "Say that again."

Suddenly feeling shy, you giggle like a schoolgirl and attempt to hide under your blanket, but he pulls it off, revealing your flushed cheeks.

"Please say it again," he says, grinning and patiently waiting.

You take a deep breath, savoring the moment. You purse your lips for a few seconds, then smile back at him. "I love you," you say softly, but with conviction.

He throws his head back dramatically, clutching his chest as if he's been shot, before collapsing onto the bed with a theatrical flourish.

Giggling at his antics, you playfully shove his side and tell him, "Stop being so dramatic!"

"I'm not being dramatic! I'm in love," he declares with a sigh.

You’re mildly irritated by his response. “You know, if you’re just going to joke about this—”

Just as you turn serious, he does the same. “I would never joke. Not when it comes to you.”

This was a huge step for both of you and it was the first time you’d actually said the words to each other. Years ago, he used to say that labels and verbal declarations of feelings were ‘superficial’. Anybody can say ‘I love you’ but never really grasp the full weight of it. He was all about ‘showing’ not ‘telling.’

The old you thought that made a lot of sense. It sounded logical. And because you were actually in love with him then, you believed it.

You swallow the lump in your throat. "I want you to know that this is still scary for me. This isn’t like when we were sleeping around at the dorms or hotels. The stakes are higher now."

He turns his body toward you. He cradles your legs with one arm and circles the other around your waist to pull you closer.

“I really fucked things up by not telling you how I felt and ignoring your needs. I was selfish and a coward.”

You shake your head gently at how he was placing all the blame on himself. “We were young and had a lot of growing up to do. Both of us needed that time apart.”

He looks at you with a mix of regret and determination in his eyes. "I recognize that now," he says softly. "And I want to do better and be better for you. Things will be different this time."

His words fill you with hope, and you feel your heart fill with warmth as you realize that he is committed to making things work between you.

The thought of it also turns you on wildly. You lean in and press your lips to his. “Take me to bed,” you whisper.

He pulls back slightly and stares into your eyes. “I’m not saying these things just to get it in,” he chuckles. “Like I said, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want—”

“I know,” you interrupt gently before your lips curve into a smile. “Let me worry about what I want. And what I want, is for us to go to bed.”

Nodding, he switches the TV off and you both walk upstairs into your bedroom.

******

You walk into the room, with him following closely behind. As you turn to face him, he stops in his tracks, cautiously anticipating your next move.

You reach up and cup his face in your hands. He closes his eyes, reveling in your touch. Tilting your chin up, he meets halfway, and seals his mouth to yours. The kiss starts soft and sweet, but quickly builds up to a fever pitch.

Desire surges through you, and he matches your fervor. His fingers grip the back of your neck, deepening the kiss. He groans against your lips, making those low, sexy sounds that you turn you on. Your hands explore his chest, feeling every inch of him. Just as you're about to lose control, he breaks the kiss.

He spins you around, your back pressed against him, caging you while his hand roams all around your front.  You threw your head back in a low moan as he nipped at your neck, grinding his hard cock between your ass cheeks.

He wraps his arms around you and nuzzles your neck. His heavy breaths send shivers down your spine.

“How did I get so lucky?” he whispers as his teeth graze your earlobe.

"I wouldn't call it luck," you murmur breathlessly, shifting your head to give him better access to your throat. "...More like a well-deserved outcome," you finish. He runs his nose down the slope of your neck, and you feel him smile against it.

"I'm really trying to control myself," he sighs. "But I'd be lying if I said I haven't spent a lot of time fantasizing about how this evening would go."

You release a pained groan, squirming as he lazily sucks on your neck. "Tell me," you say.

He pauses his ministrations, giving you a chance to break away and turn to face him.

“Tell me about your fantasies,” you say to him.

Namjoon teasingly swipes his tongue between his lips and leans forward. “I can tell you and show you.”

In anticipation, your chest rises as you inhale sharply and bite your lower lip. It was all the consent he needed.

"First of all, you're wearing too many clothes," he smirks.

You reach for the hem of your sleep shirt, intending to pull it off, but he stops you. He gently wags his finger and tuts. "In my fantasy, I do all the work."

You release the material and relinquish control to him. Wrapping his arms around you, he repeats your earlier action and pulls your shirt up. You lift your arms above your head, allowing him to easily slip it off you. As he leans in, you anticipate a kiss, but he surprises you by tossing you over his shoulder.

He walks across the room, and his hand reaches down to tug on your panties, pulling them below the curve of your ass. You yelp as he spanks you hard enough to sting.

He sits you down on the mattress and crouches in front of you. As he pulls your panties past your bare feet, he asks, “Are you good, baby?”

“Yeah.” You smile and touch his cheek. The moment of tenderness makes your heartbeat stutter as if he wasn’t just about to ravish you seconds later.

He nods and flashes a dimple before he picks up where he left off.

He plants a soft kiss on your inner thigh. “Are you ready for me?”

You arch an eyebrow at him in response. “The better question is, are you ready for me?”

You let out another squeal when Namjoon jerks your hips to the very edge of the bed with your legs on either side of him, exposing your center to his gaze.

“You’re going to be sorry you said that.”

You pushed at his shoulder, challenging him. “Teach me a lesson, then.”

He presses your thighs wide with gentle hands, his thumb stroking over your clit, pleasure pulsing through you.

He lowers his voice to a dangerously low tone. “You know, I’m trying to set the pace here but you’re no help.” He gets some revenge when he pulls his shirt over his head.

“You know I can take it,” you say as evenly as possible while trying not to drool over the sight of his bare chest.

“I know you can,” he murmurs. “But I want this to last a while.” Your stomach tightens when he lowers his head. As soon as his tongue licks through your folds, you grasp desperately at the sheets beneath you and fall back onto the mattress. He parts you with his fingers, teasing your sensitive flesh while you keen and writhe in pleasure.

“I’ve imagined this so many different ways,” he purred, teasing your clit with the tip of his tongue. Your hips buck but he holds you firmly down.

“On my bed.” He sucks. “In my studio.” And licks.

“In the back room of the restaurant that I took you to on our first date after we had the no-sex conversation.”

“God. Namjoon,” You moan pathetically, dizzy at the sight of him savoring you.

“I imagine pinning you down,” he went on roughly, “Giving it to you all night…your nipples swollen from me sucking on them. The room filled with all those sexy sounds you do…when I make you cum over and over…” He gives your clit one long suction.

You whimper, biting your lip as he flutters his tongue. He has one of your legs hooked over his bare shoulder. The heat from his skin burns the flesh behind your knee.

“Yes, I want all that,” Your hands roam over your breasts, pinching at your aching nipples for relief.

He grins mischievously. “I know.” He continues to suck on your bundle of nerves, teasing you relentlessly as your climax builds up further. With his lips still wrapped around your clit, he slides two fingers into your soaked opening, curling them upward to massage your inner walls.

You gasp sharply at the assault when he pumps into you. Hips moving of their own volition, grinding into his greedy mouth.

You climax with a breathless cry, your legs shaking with the rush of release after months of pent-up tension between you.

You were still coming down from your high when his body loomed over you. He shoves his bottoms down just enough to free his cock.

You watch as he carefully slips a condom down his length. Wanting to feel him in your hands, you attempt to reach for it, but he catches you by your wrist. He brings your hand to his lips and kisses the inside before pinning your hands above your head.

His eyes studies your face, his lips still glistening from your orgasm, his chest heaving. You blink up at him in wonder and ask yourself, 'how did you get so lucky'?

“I love you,” he pants.

“I love you,” you reply before he slides his length between your folds. He pushes in, parting the slick opening.

He buries his face in your throat with a groan, then surges inside you. He gasps your name, slowly grinding his hips against you, trying to get deeper.

His hips work in a steady rhythm. The feel of him inside you, stretching you, drives you crazy. You shift and wrap your legs around him for leverage and meet his thrusts.

His lips brushed against your temple. “Fuck, you feel so good. I don’t think I can last much longer…but I…I want to—“

He sounded apologetic, but he didn’t need to. Your throat tightens. “I don’t care. I’m not going anywhere. Don’t stop!”

He pulls out, lifts your ass, then thrusts deeply.  You moan helplessly, your cunt squeezing him greedily. “Fuck yes…” you hiss. “Harder. Fuck me harder.”

He strokes into you and you writhe under him, your thighs grasping his hips. Digging his knees in, he gives you what you begged for and fucks relentlessly into you. His cock plunges deeply, over and over, breathing naughty fantasies into your ear and pushing you closer to another climax.

Your core tenses and your clit throbs with every slam of his hips against yours. He pounds into you, every muscle in his body flexing.

“I’m gonna cum so hard for you,” he strains, sweat sliding down his temple.

The promise of him filling you sets you off, and before you know it, you come undone for him again, your pussy spasming furiously. The obscene sounds of hot, sweaty fucking fills your bedroom while he chases his own climax.

He slows down his movements deliberately, and with one final stroke, you feel him spurting inside of you. Rough sounds of satisfaction rumble from his chest and resonate against your sweat-slicked skin.

He lies there for a moment, his heartbeat gradually slowing to a steady rhythm. When he lifts his head, his fingers run through your hair.

Namjoon cradles your face in his hands and kisses you. “Thank you.”

“What are you thanking me for? You did all the work,” you laugh.

His slow smile showed pure satisfaction. “I’m only grateful for the privilege.”

You roll your eyes playfully. “Stop,” you giggle. “You’re just saying that because you’re horny.”

“Nah, I’m love-drunk,” he grins lazily before planting another kiss on your lips. You’re so endeared…as if you couldn’t love him anymore.

He flops on the bed beside you, and you rest a hand on his chest, patting it softly. "By the way, top-tier fantasy," you remark.

Turning to face you, his smile widens and he mischievously squints at you. “Oh, you thought that was it?” He laughs. “We haven’t even gotten through the half of it!”

The thought of being the recipient of Namjoon’s insatiable desire for you sends a flutter of excitement through your body.

******

You are jolted awake by a dream you had. In it, you were falling into a bottomless pit.

Your heart races as you quickly turn your head to the other side of the bed, where Namjoon is sleeping soundly.

You’d been at each other for at least two hours before both of you passed out from exhaustion and fell asleep.

You carefully slide out of bed, trying not to wake him, and make your way to the bathroom.

When you reenter the bedroom, the scene before you takes your breath away. Namjoon is sprawled across your bed, with one arm tossed over his head and the other draped across his chest. When you were shopping for a mattress, it seemed excessive to get one so huge. However, now that you see his feet resting comfortably on the bed instead of dangling off it, it doesn't seem like such a bad investment after all.

God, he was breathtaking. When he was onstage, he exuded an unstoppable force, trained to be the object of many people’s fantasies. And yet, you were the only one who could bring him to his knees.

He shifts as you climb onto the bed. He blinks up at you.

“Hey, come here.” He sounds drowsy, but you find it incredibly sexy.

“I love you,” you say as you lower yourself into his outstretched arms. His warm skin is perfect for snuggling. Seeing him like this makes you want to be close to him, but in a different way.

He kisses you deeply, but you pull away just in time to regain control. “I'm not done with you,” he warns. Despite already going three rounds (that you can recall), he shamelessly craves more. Admittedly, so do you.

You gently place your pointer finger on his lips and shake your head. "It's my turn."

He raises an eyebrow in curiosity.

“We spent all night living out your fantasies but didn’t even get to mine. Not fair–that’s not how this relationship is supposed to work,” you pout.

“I’m sorry,” he says sweetly, brushing your cheek with his finger. “What do you want, my love?”

You wrap your legs around his thigh and rub against it, letting him feel that you are already wet for him. The friction makes you moan, as does the promise of being naughty.

You kiss him, press your body against him. “Two things.”

His finger grazes your forehead. “Anything.”

“One, I want to taste you,” you whisper then glance downward at his crotch.

His teeth sink into his bottom lip, already into it. “And the second thing?”

This is when you try to hold back your excitement. “You have to be very, very still.”

He’s suddenly puzzled. “Huh?”

“I want you to keep your hands to yourself while I work on you,” you state.

He groans in frustration. “You know that’s impossible–”

“Just trust me!”

Eventually, he acquiesces. “Alright. How do you want me?”

You purse your lips and motion for him to sit up against the headboard, and he obliges. You lift his arms and direct him to hold onto the gaps in the frame.

Next, you grab hold of his boxers' waistband and he lifts his hips to assist you. As you pull them past his feet, you ask, "Are you good, baby?"

“Yes,” he answers with a gentle smirk.

You spread his thighs apart, but before you position yourself between them, you lean forward to give him a kiss. He instinctively embraces you, with one hand pushing into your hair and the other resting on the small of your back, urging you to come closer.

Clearing your throat, you flick your eyes to his hands, giving him a warning look. He smiles, suddenly remembering one of your stipulations, and lets his hands fall to his sides.

You press a light kiss to his lips before moving your mouth across his cheek, down to his throat. Your tongue darts out to lick his golden skin before latching on, causing him to let out a pained growl. You graze him with your teeth, leaving a mark. Rough sounds of pleasure vibrate against your lips.

Pulling back, you admire the bright red bruise you left and giggle triumphantly at your handiwork. “Mine.”

"Yours," he vows with hooded eyes.

"Good answer." Pleased, you continue to move lower, finding and teasing his nipples. You lick over them, around them, then blow. Namjoon hisses and growls at the shot of cool air against his sensitized skin. He resists the temptation to roll you onto your back and pin you to the mattress, but instead, he grips the headboard tighter, his knuckles turning white.

As you make your way down his torso, you feel his entire body tighten with anticipation. When your tongue rims his belly button, his hips jerk up.

If he only knew just how excited you were to see him in this state. You want to reward him for having this much obedience and self-control.

With your hands on his inner thighs, you urge him to spread open wider, giving you room to settle comfortably. Dipping your head, your lips part, and you give his cock a precursory lick.

“Fuuucking…hell…” he growls.

It sends another wave of arousal through you. Wrapping your lips around him, you give him back what he gave you last night. Using only your mouth, you worship him, sucking gently and caressing him with your tongue.

He mutters a mix of curses and praises, feeling both lost and dizzy with pleasure.

You pause for a moment and tease him. “You like that?”

He sits up on his elbows, and looks at you wryly. “No, I hate every second it!”

You laugh then wrap your lips around his tip and hum.

“Aaaahh…fuck me. What the fuck,” he groans at the vibration. You see his eyes roll to the back of his head. “Deeper, please,” he begs.

Since he asked so nicely, you oblige and take him in completely until the tip reaches the back of your throat.

He cries out, his back arching as if he wants to pull away, but you hold onto him with your lips and hands, cupping and massaging, encouraging him to reach the peak of pleasure.

“Fuck…fuck…” he chokes out, fighting every urge to wrap his hand around your nape to control the pace. He knows you’re enjoying this too much and the thought of it sends him into a frenzy. His thighs ached with strain, muscles hardening by the force it took to restrain himself.

You feel his balls tighten and you know he’s close. Hollowing your cheeks, you bob your head at an even pace, swirling your tongue around his length simultaneously.

“Ahh, baby, I’m gonna cum…fuck…”

In the same moment that you pull off, he grunts and spurts right at your chest. You sit up and lean back on your heels, pumping him with your fist to prolong and intensify the sensation. You can feel the contractions against your fingertips, pulsing from his flesh as he lets out a drawn-out groan.

When his body calms down, you release him and move to lay by his side.

After a few beats, he croaks out, "Am I allowed to touch you now?"

With a playful giggle, you give him permission. Finally, his heavy arm shifts, blindly searching to pull you closer. You snuggle into his embrace, feeling his heartbeat gradually steadying against yours as he plants a kiss on the top of your head. Both of you collapse in a tired, satisfied heap, but you loved it.

And you loved him.

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Thank you so much for reading!

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[reidsaurora]

"I Choose You" ~ S. Reid

Summary: What happens when the lowly stable boy, Spencer, and the royalist of princesses, Y/N, fall in love?

Pairing: Stable Boy!Spencer Reid x Royalty!Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1,830

Content Warning: explicit language, slightly suggestive if you squint, minor character death sorta, mentions of food, time period appropriate sexism/classism i guess (Reader is expected to get married to a prince), a mild mention of ✨️manure✨️

Genre: Fluff, maybe a lil angsty in some parts buy mostly fluffy

Originally Written: 02/24/2023

Beta Read By: @dungeons-are-too-cold

Criminal Minds masterlist can be found here!

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"𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐮𝐧 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐚 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞." - 𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫 𝐔𝐧𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐧

I knew it was a selfish, spoiled, first-world problem, but I needed to get out of that kingdom, and fast.

I sprinted through the halls, one thing on my mind—hopping on my horse and riding somewhere far away from this hell hole. I heard my father yelling, "Y/N! Get back here!" but I didn't care. The exit was in my sights. Freedom.

My heels dug into the mud, my dress surely had dirt on the ends, but I couldn't have cared less. I flung the door to the stable open, holding my breath as I tried to find Willow's saddle.

"Hey, slow down. It's not as if the castle is under siege," a familiar voice chuckled behind me.

I took a deep breath before turning to face him, slightly regretting it as I breathed in the horrid smell of manure. Though, I needed it in order to face him with proper composure "Hi, Spencer."

With the same soft eyes he always had, he looked me over, noticing my distress. "What's wrong?"

My shoulders settled as I realized it was just the two of us. I could be as honest as I wanted to with Spencer, and he'd always accept it. Much unlike my parents.

It was always like that with Spencer. Sure, he was just the stable boy and I was royalty, and if they ever found out I was the slightest bit kind to Spencer, they'd most likely put me on house arrest. But there was always something about him, something inviting, like you wanted to tell him your life story and let him analyze it for you.

So, I did what I always did when I heard that soft, inviting voice. I answered. "Father's brought in prospects again and he's angry that I haven't chosen anyone yet."

"Again?" he said, nearly laughing in disbelief. "You'd think His Majesty would figure out your plan by now."

"My plan?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow. "OK, stable boy, just what plan do you speak of?"

He tapped a finger against his chin, his eyebrows furrowing as he thought. "Hmm, your plan to hop on your horse and ride into the sunset, going to a faraway country and starting a bakery."

"A bakery?" I nearly choked in bewilderment. "I don't even know how to prepare my own tea! Could you imagine me attempting to bake breads and muffins?"

"Ooh, I got it!" he exclaimed, clapping his hands together and playing up the satire. "You're going to start your own tailor shop!"

I giggled, shaking my head. "Who's going to teach me to sew? You?"

Deadpan, he answered, "I do know how to."

I scoffed, my hands flying to my waist. "You do not."

He nodded, looking away from my face and down at his twiddling fingers. "My mother taught me. Before she got too sick. That way I'd know how to fix my buttons after she was…"

I swallowed hard, a touch of sadness panging in my heart for him. I already knew about his mother, the way she'd gotten sick and left him orphaned. It was the whole reason he'd come to the castle, so he'd have just enough money for food on the table, or in his lunch pail rather.

The sound of my mother calling, "Y/N!" startled us from our thoughts, her sudden shouting frightening me to the point of an irregular heartbeat. She was approaching the stables fast, and by the tone in her voice, it was clear she wasn't happy.

"Come on!" I whispered, grabbing one of the saddles from where it hung and shoving it into Spencer's hands, our fingers brushing against each other's for only a millisecond.

His face might as well have had "panic" inked across it. "What are you doing?"

"Buying us time," I answered, struggling to hold my dress out of my way as I climbed onto Willow's back. "You can take Father's horse, since he's apparently getting too old to ride it anyway."

He tossed the saddle onto Copper's back, throwing himself up onto the stallion with ease. Curses upon all men and the fact that they don't have to wear these stupid dresses.

"Y/N, get down from there!" Mother called as she burst through the doors and saw us, but it was too late. Spencer and I had already started off, laughing as we raced away from the stables.

His hair blew in the wind, a wide smile sitting on his lips, the first I'd seen in a long time. "Where to first, M'lady?" he chuckled, speeding ahead of me.

I scoffed but couldn't help myself from giggling at his childish behavior. "Hey!" I shouted, racing to catch up to him. "I was thinking," I laughed as I passed him, watching as his eyes widened, "Paris! Or maybe Rome!"

"Don't you think it's a bit far for the horses?"

I took a deep breath of the fresh spring air, something I hadn't smelled in months, it seemed like. "We'll just have to find a way to manage."

Soon enough, we were all out of breath, deciding to stop in a beautiful field of wildflowers, overlooking lusciously green hills and valleys.

We hopped off our respective horses, tying their bridles to a nearby tree and collapsing into the flowers in a fit of giggles.

"We should do that more often," Spencer got out, his chest puffing with exasperated breaths.

"What? Run away from my parents? Believe me, if I could get away with it, I would."

"You could."

I rolled onto my side to face him, propping myself up with one arm. "What?"

"You could totally run away and do what you want. You could be a baker, a seamstress, a teacher, an author, or whatever you'd like. You could do it if you tried."

I looked him over, suddenly feeling the urge to kiss away the pout on his perfectly plump lips. I swallowed hard and shook away the thought immediately. "You sound like you speak from experience, stable boy."

He shook his head. "I'm just saying. You have the status. You could leave if you wanted."

"Believe me, I couldn't abdicate the throne if I were the last person on earth. Somehow, even if both my parents were gone, they'd still find a way to tell me all the things they expected of me."

I wanted to press on, to ask why exactly he was so passionate about the subject, but held my tongue. A proper lady always knows when to speak and when to bite her tongue, my mother's voice echoed in my mind.

Spencer turned onto his side to face me better, propping himself up on his surprisingly thick bicep. Why was I noticing it? "M'lady-"

"Y/N, it's Y/N. You of all people will never have to call me M'lady, Her Royal Highness, or any of those other stupid titles."

"Y/N," he clarified, looking a bit like he'd just licked a postage stamp. Must've felt strange falling out of his mouth. "I'm just a stable boy. It's all I'll ever be. But you can do whatever you'd like. You're royalty, for heaven's sakes! Anyone who didn't allow you to do what you want could be burned at the stake."

My face softened as I watched his expression change to one of grief. He was regretting his decision to become a stable boy after his mother died, I had realized. I sighed, lying down flat beside him and looking up at the cloudy sky. "Well, what do you really wish to do?"

He exhaled, lying down beside me. It was like that a lot, I'd noticed. When I moved, he moved. And when he moved, I moved. Like gravity. "I'd like to go to college. Learn how to read, specifically Latin. Oh, and learn about math. And rhetoric. And anything they'd teach me, really."

He let out a deep breath, basking in the afternoon air, I presumed. "What would you do?"

Kiss you. And hold your hands. And run away with you. "Um, I'm not quite sure."

"Come on. There has to be something in that beautiful brain."

My head shot up, my eyes widening in confusion at what he'd just said. "Beautiful?"

He blushed, his cheeks burning red. "Well, it doesn't take a scientist to see you're beautiful."

"You think I'm beautiful, Spencer?"

The heels of his hands dug into his eyes, hiding his embarrassment-ridden face. "And this why you can't go to college, Spencer," he mumbled. "Too stupid."

I slapped his dirt covered chest, realizing that it was the second time in one day that I'd touched him. I liked it. "You aren't stupid! You know how to keep the horses alive. I wouldn't even be able to keep myself alive if it weren't for maids and cooks."

I pulled his hands away from his face, his deep hazel eyes burning an ever so pleasant hole right through me. "Did you really mean it? Do you really think I'm beautiful?"

His tongue darted out to wet his lips, and suddenly I could think of multiple other places I wanted his tongue to be. "I do. I think you're the prettiest girl in the whole kingdom. Possibly even the whole world if I knew what it was like."

Suddenly, the cool air of spring burned right through me and I found myself unable to resist the brunet stable boy I craved so much. "Do you really wish to know what I'd do if I could leave?"

He nodded, looking up at me through long, soft eyelashes.

I tossed myself over him, my dress falling around the both of us. "I'd grab your hand," I started, slotting my left hand in his right, "and I'd run away with you. Go wherever you want. We could sail to America and join Vaudeville. We could go to Greece and become olive farmers. We could go to China and study philosophy. I don't care. As long as I could be with you."

His face softened once again, his thumb swiping soft lines on the back of my hand. "Is that why you never say yes to any of your father's prospects?"

I nodded, thinking Fuck it, before leaning down, allowing my lips to glide into his. It was just as pleasant, just as sweet, as I'd always imagined. His hands moved to my waist, settling on the taut material of my now dirty, mud-spattered dress. I tried to pull away first, but his succulent lips chased mine for another kiss, his tongue slipping into my mouth for a split second. I already craved more of it as soon as his mouth pulled away from mine.

"I would never say yes to one of those pompous, pampered, pretty-haired pricks. I want you. Out of everyone in the world, you are the one I'd choose."

His hands darted to my cheeks, pulling me into his swollen, red lips once again. "You want to know something, M'lady? I choose you, too."

"𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞, 𝐈 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞." - 𝐃𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐤 𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐫𝐚

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Aaaahh, I'm so excited to finally post this!!! Idk why it's taken me so long to post but I am so excited to finally be posting it! As always, a huge thank you to Georgia for beta reading this and helping it reach its fullest potential! I love you so so so much!!! 🫶🏻

This was written for @imagining-in-the-margins's monthly challenge, which was themed "Damsel/Dude in Distress" this month! I am so excited to finally be participating in another one of these! I obviously went with the Royalty!AU prompt, but it was actually quite hard to pick a prompt because they all intrigued me a lot!

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Anti-Racism In Glass Onion: It's A Whole Thing, Part One

So I wasn't going to write this, because I'm white and it felt like veering very far out of my lane. But I also haven't seen anyone else talking about it, and finally I decided I'd rather make an ass of myself by doing something well-meaning than I would to uphold a status quo that zips right by one of the most important things in this film (that doesn't get explored enough in media or fandom), so here we are. Please keep in mind this is going to be FULL of spoilers so if you're not about that life, you'll want to give this a pass for now. (I also expected it to be much shorter than it is. It’s, uh, nine pages long. So it will be multiple posts long. Sorry.)

I don't think I've yet seen anyone really touch in-depth on the fact that this is a movie with a pretty strong theme calling out antiblack racism and the overturning thereof. Indeed, I’ve only seen one post mentioning it at all.

So let’s analyze, yes?

First, let's look at "the disrupters." They include:

--an alt-right streamer who's openly mentioned as being just about every -ism in the book

--his blonde-haired, blue-eyed girlfriend who's with him for status

--a white politician who objects to Klear not on the basis that it could cost lives, but that it will lose her the progressive vote

--an absolute idiot of a white supermodel who's had two serious antiblack race-based scandals, and is about to have another that's just generally racist

--a Black scientist who repeatedly tries to speak up and gets shot down

--a Black woman, the actual brains of this entire outfit, who created the original business plan and a multibillion-dollar company and got first fired, then financially ousted, then murdered

Now let's look at some other Black characters and Black imagery in the story. These include:

--a mural of Kanye West depicted as a messiah

--Serena Williams, as Miles' personal trainer

--the phrase "sucking on his titties," spoken by a Black woman

--a cameo by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, as one of Benoit Blanc's friends

—a Beatles song (yes, really)

--the lower-middle-class sister of the Black woman who was the actual brains, etc.

Before we move on, I want to address the Kanye thing, because Glass Onion was filmed in 2021, probably written in 2020, and the point where Kanye went absolutely batshit deep-end off-the-fucking-rails was in 2022. I do not believe Rian Johnson was making any kind of "go Kanye" statement here--I think it was an unfortunate confluence of timing. As I discuss Kanye further, I want it to be clear we're discussing already-gross-but-not-yet-gone-full-Nazi Kanye.

So let's go ahead and get him out of the way first, because he's an incredibly important figure in Black music but as a Jew I just. Really do not want to be discussing Kanye West longer than I have to, I'm sorry. West is the kind of figure Miles Bron would absolutely want to have in his life as a status symbol. First, if we look at Bron's definition of being "a disrupter" (first you break a small thing, then very quickly you break the system itself), Kanye absolutely qualifies. He started out as a small artist mostly producing beats for other musicians, then did some work for Jay-Z that led to an album Rolling Stone considered one of the best hip-hop albums of all time, and then he dropped The College Dropout. I knew his work was considered influential before I started looking into this imagery deeper, but I had no idea how influential--this was his debut album and it hit #2 on the charts, produced a single that debuted at #1, included a song called "Jesus Walks" that hit the top 20 even though it was predicted a Christian song would never land in hip-hop, and the album is still considered one of "the greats" by other artists--twenty years later. I'd say that pretty neatly fits Miles' definition of "disruption." He did, indeed, first break something small and then turn the hip-hop world on its head.

Where there's a second layer to this that I think would also speak to Miles is that in 2018, Kanye declared the chattel slavery of West African people in the Americas was "a choice"--as in, they chose to be enslaved. He later claimed he was referring to "mental enslavement," but no matter how you cut it, regardless of his own race, that's a pretty fucking racist antiblack statement (in addition to being wildly historically revisionist). While I doubt Miles would be like “hell yeah, racism!,” he’d absolutely buy 100% into the idea of choosing to be in hellish circumstances, because He Got Out All On His Own (even though he didn’t), So You Can Too.

Moving on, we have Serena Williams. She's another person who'd fit Miles' description of "a disrupter," but where Kanye would probably revel in that idea, I honestly don't think she'd like it very much, and her attitude in the movie really underlines that. Yes, she's taking his money to be his "personal trainer," but really, he's frittering her life away. She's sitting there reading a book waiting for him to decide he wants to get off his ass and work out today. She's not a slave, but she has been explicitly put in a role as a paid servant. I don't think it's out of the question to say Miles specifically picked her over, say, Jillian Michaels, because she is Black. Do I think he sat down and went "who's a Black athlete I can subjugate?" No. I think if you asked Miles he'd be the kind of person who'd unironically say "I'm not racist! The head scientist at Alpha is Black!" What I think happened--or to be more accurate, what I think the kind of train of thought Rian Johnson would attribute to him would have caused to happen--is that he picked someone he'd be comfortable ignoring. Did he consciously decide he'd be more comfortable ignoring a Black woman and telling her to put up or shut up if she complained he was wasting her time? No. But do I think we should attribute unconscious biases and prejudices to him that aided him in the decision that he'd be comfortable ignoring her? Yes.

Incidentally, while we’re here, let’s discuss how the two of them stack up to Miles’ other “status symbol” name-drops. First, let’s discard Banksy. He’s a special case here and we’ll discuss him later. But now let’s look at the others. We’ve got Jeremy Renner, whose personal I-make-this-for-my-inner-circle food Miles proudly eats and hands out; Jared Leto, whose personal I-make-this-for-my-inner-circle drink Miles proudly offers to friends (although if memory serves me, he himself is drinking beer); Gillian Flynn, who he’s hired to write a mystery game for his own inner circle; Philip Glass, who he hired to write the music for the Glass Onion’s clock, which is there to impress guests; and Anderson Cooper, whose party he supposedly attended. Notice something about all the celebrities whose products he actively engages with? Yeah. They’re all white. Serena is relegated to a private room and not interacted with, while Kanye doesn’t even get a mention—and as I noted above, this movie would have gone through post far too late for Rian Johnson to have been able to say “let’s…remove praising the dude who’s declared himself a Nazi, please,” which means if Kanye was ever mentioned at all, it was cut long before real!Kanye’s final downward spiral. The Black “status symbols” have literally been relegated to being Miles’ props and “the help.”

Now let's talk about Helen's turn of phrase when she's reading "the disrupters" for absolute filth. She tells all of them what they want is Miles' (and, by extension, Andi's) money, and that they're "sucking on his titties." Putting the line in the mouth of a Black woman puts me instantly in mind of the "mammy" stereotype, where the Black woman is expected to nurture and nourish and care for all of the (implied or outright stated to be white) children and have no personality outside this. Technically it's Miles' money, but it's Miles' money specifically because of the shit he pulled with Andi--he sucked her dry and now is being fed upon in turn. The thing is, the way Black women are further treated throughout the narrative doesn't make this a faux-cutesy little image like those godawful racist vintage ads; it's horrifying. It is horrifying and it should be horrifying; it’s disgusting and the narrative wants you to be disgusted at this.

To continue, we have that cameo by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. It's really only noteworthy because he's the one who's giving Blanc shit for failing at Among Us and refusing to get out of the bathtub. This is important for reasons I'll come back to (put a pin in this), but for now suffice it to say it's important because Blanc is white and Southern and we'll get back to that.

Next up, it’s “Blackbird,” the song Miles was playing on guitar when the ship lands. Other posts have noted that for all Blackbird sounds very pretty and impressive, it’s actually very simple to play, and that this reflects Miles’ relationship with the world in general—pretending he’s bigger, better, smarter, more, than he actually is. This is probably true. I’ve also seen it mentioned that it, like Glass Onion, is a Beatles song from the White Album, and this is also true. What you may not know if you’re not a Beatles nerd is that “Blackbird” isn’t about a bird at all. Paul McCartney has stated several times over the years that the song had a dual inspiration—the sound of blackbirds, but also news reports about the American Black civil rights movement, and that when he says “blackbird” you should be thinking “black girl.” Birdie is excited and immediately declares it’s “her song,” which in her mind probably has to do with her name, but I strongly suspect that for Rian Johnson, this was another way to tie in how absolutely wildly Birdie is willing to appropriate Black experiences and culture. This is particularly true because of the exact part of Black history the song references—Birdie tells us she’s done blackface to dress as Beyoncé (a modern Black feminist who strongly pushes for empowerment) and has compared herself to Harriet Tubman (an escaped slave who proceeded, during Reconstruction, to become part of the women’s suffrage movement). Blackbird links these two together, with our nameless 1960s Black civil rights protestor falling squarely between the two named women. Also worth noting here is that “Blackbird” was released in 1968; while the Black Power movement was getting underway and “Black” or “African-American” would become the accepted terms over the next decade, “Negro” and “colored” were still the polite ways to refer to a Black person in the US. McCartney has since gone on the record apologizing for some pretty serious racism during his time with the Beatles, and I’m choosing for simplicity’s sake here to assume he was sincere, but this makes the song itself another example of appropropriation—“Black” wasn’t really a word McCartney, as a white man, had the right to use when the song came out. That makes “Blackbird” an even more apt double-metaphor—Birdie the appropriator of Black culture calling it “her” song, and Miles “I steal everything not nailed down and say I did it” Bron using it to look like he’s more than he is.

The second half of this (admittedly extremely messy) essay is here.

[puella-1n-somn10]

🥠PMMM x PKMN AU: Miscellaneous Notes🥠

Sorry, all! No magi/witch analyses are available at the moment! Not only am I still busy, I'm also writing down a separate analysis post that is kinda unrelated to the AU as a whole, and am still gathering up notes and inspiration for Penny's megapost; progress is going slowly, but swimmingly now that I've gotten a clear idea of what I am aiming for in my head. Sincerest apologies for the delay on that aspect ^^;

Though, as a sort of milestone achievement, now that I have over 5k posts on this blog, I've figured that perhaps I could share some of the notes I have on my persons in regards to the development of Hop and Hau's magi and witch form designs, and how they've changed throughout the time in between the conceptualization of their megapost to the final product. I know this isn't enough to properly thanks you all for the support y'all have given me, but, for time being, what better way to immortalize this moment than by sharing the journey we took along the way?

Quite the cheesy way to celebrate such an occasion, I know, I know- but, hey, isn't the process of immortalizing the journey we have taken to reach the point we are at right now just as important as the finish line just before us? The roads we have taken to get so far deserve to be cherished; with these struggles- with the blissful highs and the crushing lows, came the memories we have experienced along the way, all of which possessing flavors that move us all and allow us to carry on to the next day. What, pray tell, would constitute a better way to celebrate such a milestone?

Of course, I'm also open to any and all questions regarding characters that haven't received their own megaposts, since I will also be talking about the possibility of whether certain characters and their cursed forms are going to debut or not. The AU as a whole is still taking shape and form, after all; a lot of things are still not completely set in stone and, as stated earlier, I am open to accepting constructive criticisms and suggestions from y'all.

So, with all that said and done, let us all raise the curtains and take a peak at what went on behind the scenes...

-The Brief, yet Entertaining Development of Hop and Sayf al-Muharib-

Fun fact, I've actually had the barebones concept for his design for quite some time now- anyone who knows me is well aware that I am a sucker for character depth, theories, and, best of all, worldbuilding, and Galar got two out of three points down in my books (if only the worldbuilding was a biiiiiiit better, but oh well; am gonna thank the crunch hours for that fuckup- we do not blame developers for the hubris of their higher-ups in this house). I wanted to show the whole world that Hop was his own character- that any and all comparisons he had with Hau are purely born from simply design similarities and the fans' inability to read and just assume the plot's progression through their desire to just mash A and move with it, and safe to say I think I've gotten the assignment down!

So, starting from the very top; you guys might remember that, way before I began to work on his megapost, I've mentioned that, if Hop ever witched out, he would become "The Gladiator Warlock, whose nature is self-abandonment". Now, you might notice that he's kept his type and some key design elements (the golden calf imagery and how his labyrinth resembles the Roman Colosseum mixed with a football arena), but that his nature is wildly different from that of the final version's. It is also important to note that it sounds a lot like Ophelia's nature, as well- as a matter of fact, his earliest design was inspired by the Wudan Witch more than I'd like to admit. ^^;

After analyzing his character, backstory, and how he began to develop throughout SWSH, though, I slowly began to realize that this term really doesn't ring right with Hop as his own character. After inquiring with a good friend of mine, @bluethepearldiver, they came up with a much better nature for him in all honesty; admiration. It was simple, right there, nailed his motivations to a T, yet I just couldn't see it. It had that riiiiiight amount of dissonance and tragedy that is synonymous with the witches in Madoka, and describes what would bring Hop to his end on fleek! Such a complex character, such a riveting motivation- such an ironic and bittersweet end to the tale of his legend...

Unto the earliest version of his design- it was quite simple, really. For starters, he was supposed to be this...faceless sheep hybrid donning golden armor and is fused to a chariot; what was supposed to be the "horse" is in fact a piece of said chariot and is either seen as an extension of the warlock or something resembling living armor. As for the labyrinth, it was certainly not as dim and oppressive as it is now; just a coliseum arena where his familiars jeer and mock at him, with the main color scheme present being a mix of gold and bits of shining red.

As I said, the Ophelia inspiration was as clear as daytime and I was still in the midst of analyzing Hop as a character, so I had to yeet all that out of the window. I may have kept the themes and design elements associating him with fire as an element and meshed it with metal-working and how swords and shields are forged (hence, him still trying to reforge himself to be in Leon's image), but, in all honesty, I still do like the freakiness of said earlier design itself and am currently regretting scrapping some of the early design details present here and there (him being fused to the chariot especially, reflecting him seeing himself in Leon's light and wanting to be like him), so....who knoooooows...? Maybe a remaster of the OG post is on the horizon? Eh, later- I still need to work on Penny's and [REDACTED], after all.

Flash forwards to when I was finally actually writing down the megapost; it might come across as a surprise, but he actually had a different surname during development; Sayf al-Jundi, which means "The Soldier's Sword". I had the idea of him fighting for Leon's honor and to make him proud of his little brother; how he felt indebted to Lee for raising him and actually giving a shit while his own mother and grandparents couldn't, like it was some finite resource/favor.

After much brainstorming, however, I felt like it didn't "fit" Hop's journey completely, either; boosts his themes of incompetence and being lesser-than, indeed, but it did not reflect Hop's development as his own character outside of Leon's image and his desire for his validation, nor did it..."feel" like a witch's name. After thinking abt it more, I went with a surname that bears the same meaning but has more of a kick to it- al-Muharib, meaning "The Warrior"; boosting the idea of Hop's karmic potential being possibly higher than the MC's and the theme of performances Galar has going on!

As for his familiars- to be frank, they sure did take me some time to develop! At first I just wanted them to be the audience partaking in cheering at the spectacle and ridiculing him, but, as I was looking at gameplay of Pokemon Shield on the side whilst writing down the post, I knew I just HAD to bring in Hop's desire for knowledge, him learning all there is about battles from Lee and his achievements, his destiny to become a professor, and how he's seen as a sort of "know-it-all" by the beginning as he guides us through the game. It was quite tough; trying to balance Hop's traits so that both Sayf and the newly-created familiar would share it equally- but I think I did a decent job at it! While the audience, Al-Dajij, are still here, his little rambunctious archivists, the Abatil, have also stepped in to the spotlight, stole any and all trinkets/records related to Leon, and, with them, they took our hearts! Honestly, when compared to the audience and their warlock, they are just. So, so adorable- just like the Anthonies and Walpurgisnacht's heralds!

Finally- in regards to his labyrinth, it was simple, really; the halls leading up to the arena were, indeed, decrepit and claustrophobic, with traps here and there, but the vibes weren't *there*. Once again, I NEED to thank Blue here, especially with them introducing the video "My House Tour" to me and the idea that there is a nasheed that is constantly playing in the background. With its further development, came Hop's simple origins as a little farm boy who was raised by his brother after almost every other adult failed him; hence the outside of the arena being a rainy farmland with shadowy sheep in the distance and a broken windmill. Ah, once more, the true tragedy of Hop's home and the way he was raised strike once more- dear goodness, it's always the sublime horror that gets to ya...

While he's now looking a little more basic when compared to the witches who have arrived after him, I'm still really proud of how he and his witch card turned out! In fact, I'm happy that I've had so much fun writing all that and analyzing Hop's character- it was quite the writing exercise, I must say! Perhaps, one day, I'll redo the design itself and descent to despair, but the witch card and familiars? I am happy with how they turned out; hate to brag, but I've def cooked there....

...Unlike with a certain SOMEONE-

-The Development Hell that was Hau and Kealamauloa Kinimaka-

This. This has been a conceptual NIGHTMARE. I could have just looked at his base character, his present actions, and just made him a Charlotte clone based on Iki Town and malasadas-

But nope, my stubborn ass just had to dig deep, didn't she? Doesn't help that the G7 anime series is also a piece of comfort media, so I was more than willing to dive in to his depiction there, draw out the similarities and differences, map out the reasons behind these differences, AND went out of my way to constantly update said megapost to add in more details and iron out any typos/unfinished sentences. It was a fun journey, yeah, but, boy, was it a tough one.

Okay, okay, starting from the earliest incarnation and its name, which, I might say, was quite the wild ride; unlike Sayf, who at least had his first name stick around, Hau's witch form had a wildly different name that, honestly, stemmed from a horrible and ignorant idea during the earliest days of development- a decision that, honestly, should have been avoided since day 1-

Initially, I had the idea to give their warlock a name that wouldn't feel too out of place from either Tart Magica and Kazumi Magica respectively; to drive home that, in Alola, witches are seen in a similar lens as we view fae, alongside them being treated as separate forces of nature. A decent concept, that's for sure, but the way I've initially approached it wasn't respectful to the Hawaiian language at all, and I honestly should have at least learned the basics.

The grave mistake?

I tried to use Google Translate to come up with the name.

A silly thing to beat myself up over, I know, but it's also really not; the Hawaiian language is being suppressed by the US with many a native being punished for practicing their right of speaking in their mother tongue, and I tried to use GT, of all things?! That was an idiotic decision; I've made the mental note to never do that again- I promise that!

...Right, the old name; with it, I wanted to capture Hau's themes of duality, the aforementioned desire to portray witches as worldly forces beyond anyone's control, and how his relationship with Kahuna Hala influenced his worldview- so, with both the aforementioned meguca spinoffs in mind, I went with the term "Another Cloudy Day", which GT translated it to "ʻO Kekahi Lā ʻŌpua". Butchered to Hell and back, I am well aware- thank goodness I've noticed the error in that decision and decided not to go with that name just around the time I've decided to write down and finalize the witch card.

After mentally kicking myself for noticing how insensitive that idea was, I've decided to take another route and began looking for some Hawaiian names instead. Fun fact: I've found his surname, Kinimaka, and its associated history long before I've settled on his first; the list of options I had for that, aside from Kealamauloa, consisted of Halani, Kahoku, Kairin, Kalani, Makai, and Akamu.

I was also struggling with which name I should choose for his familiars, as well; all of which fitting the vibes and true threats of the labyrinth itself- Noelani (Heavenly mist), Hoku (Night of the full moon), Inoa (name chant), Māhealani (heavenly haze; full moon night), Miliama (drop of the sea), and, of course, Halia (remembrance of a loved one).

Though I am content with what I chose, maybe I might reuse some of these names for other witches hailing from Alola? Like a certain...trial captain? :3c Reem, stop spoiling your plans again; esp not so early into the development of Penny's megapost-

I should mention that I also had "Kealamauloa Leleo Kinimaka" on the list of options as well, but I've figured that it might have been a bit too disrespectful to the history of Hawai'i and its royal family, so I went with just using the surname instead. Again, I am not at all an expert, nor am I Hawaiian myself; I would really love some corrections on that front especially, and am happy to accept any and all criticisms from Hawaiian folk in regards to this little bugger especially.

As for the design- wait, actually, I wanna talk about his labyrinth first, because I think this was the aspect that went through the most changes throughout development. From the very beginnings, it merely resembled a picturesque city near the beach that appeared frozen in time- literally; the food was always there - prepared and steaming hot -, the sun was setting on the beach before it, and everyone, or whatever you may dub these numerous static "statues" around you, appeared to be having a good time. To represent the unchanging, eternal, yet isolating and fake vibes of the labyrinth, his familiars didn't look like glass hummingbirds at the time- rather, they were old phonographs scattered across the labyrinth. Indeed, it was a picture-perfect image of the world at its most peaceful...

That is, until you knock one of these statues onto the floor, and it is apparent from the frozen blocks on meat and speckles of blood that these were the warlock's victims; their joy and whimsy now immortalized as they act as the backdrops made to lull the labyrinth's newcomers into a sense of security. Serving as a chilling reminder that, even if this warlock was once Hau, he's still a manifestation of his own curses and despair- on top of it being a bittersweet reference to the photo the MC takes with him and Lillie.

As terrifying as this concept sounded, it also felt...dull- like, what was the warlock even doing in this labyrinth save for flying around? It was his familiars' duty to freeze his visitors, and all he did was watch? It didn't feel like Hau, and went against his free, easygoing nature. Yes, it did symbolize his weaknesses in the SM games - that being him only able to watch the disasters around him and was unable to stop them himself -, but I wanted to add in something, anything, so that the labyrinth wouldn't feel as hollow as it did.

Another concept for the labyrinth was that it consisted of dingy-old subway tunnels and stations, with advert screens and worn-away posters showcasing a tropical paradise for all to visit. Alas, all one is able to hear through these walls are the pitter-patters of afternoon rain. The warlock would be at the center, either locked in his own small aquarium within a dark room or is patrolling the dingy ol' city outside the labyrinth halls now that he's sealed his victims within the street lights. I might revisit this concept and turn it into Guzma's? Or even Gladion's? Who knows?

Here's where touching grass did me a lot of favors; it was the dawn of Summer here in Jordan at the time, so, after strolling outdoors for a bit and taking in the fresh warm air, I began to rework the vibes of his labyrinth from the ground up. Taking the initial concept and Anemonether's witch card she made for him into account, I've multiplied the ethereal factor by tenfold while also giving the barrier an illusion of liveliness and freedom; Hau's bright-eyed approach to the world is now a cage for his warlock's victims, just like how Hala had tried to keep him sheltered away from his own anger and how disappointing reality can be. Again, I really went all-out with this kiddo's design and labyrinth, and I'm glad with how they turned out!

NOW back to the warlock himself- I am going to be real, I was actually winging it as I went! Unlike Sayf and (Penny's witch), who had basic yet solid concepts to use as bases for what was to come, all that I had for Kealamauloa were three things: Turtle, Dragon, and Flowers. This is where I have to return to that moment where I touched grass because, and I shit you all not, I was also listening to some Pokemon OST at the time- and one of the songs that popped up? None other than the battle theme against the Tapus.

It was then that I had a sort of epiphany- I totally forgot to integrate Hau's culture and status as the Kahuna's grandson into it! A vivid image of the tapus' respective ruins hit me like a well-deserved smack to the back of my head for my idiocy; so I went with a turtle dragon with flora growing from his body, one that appears as though it is a part of these divine sanctuaries- and it was all history from there as I continued on with my research on Hawaiian symbology and beliefs. Honestly, scrolling through all these sources relating to said symbology is quite fun- and I might keep them in mind once I start analyzing yet another character who's native from Alola and bring their despair to life!

Again, this was a nightmare. Did I enjoy dissecting Hau as a character and was genuinely shocked by how deep he and his character development are? Absolutely. Would I subject myself to this torture once more? Fuck no. Nonetheless, I am very happy with how he and the warlock turned out; I could absolutely see him being a MagiReco unit with Kea as either a doppel or a boss thanks to the amount of detailed I've poured into the design!

-Where We are Going from Here-

As of right now, as I've already stated, I already am compiling various notes needed to get a headstart on Penny's megapost; Scarlet and Violet, dear God- I really want to give the story justice, moreso than I did for Alola, and we all know how much the G7 games mean to me. I have my gripes in regards to G9's graphics, indeed, but they've knocked it out of the park with just about everything Paldea else had to offer. Frankly, I am going to blame the drive for them to be more like "Breath of the Wild" and the backlash from G8 causing them to rehaul every God damn pokemon model from the ground up- all while their shit CEOs refuse to give them more time, but that's another rant for another day. Every day, I am reminded of how Game Freak is repeating Sonic Team's history; I have nothing but pity for the both of them honestly, and anyone who tries to tell me that "umm aktchually, they're just lazy-" is getting the hard block.

In regards to Penny herself, well, her witch's name and the "first form" I've created rn are highly subject to change, while her labyrinth is a huge WIP. Do not get me started on her Descent to Despair; I have no idea how this shit is gonna go down, though I do have my ideas. Afterwards, who knows? Maybe I'll work on Kiki's next, since the name and nature are finalized, or even go for the home run and work on [SPOILER]'s! It honestly depends on what I'm feeling at that moment, so expect the unexpected- ooooOOOOOOOooooOOOOO~

I might work on more Pokemon characters later on in the future? But, considering the amount of time each post takes, I am asking of you all to please, please be patient! I've just fixed up most of the errors in the Hau post and am trying to boost what I've written so far throughout other circles, so this takes time ;0; Plus, I still have uni to attend to- fun times for everyone. /s

Now, to close this post on a high note, I, once again, cannot emphasize how much you guys have helped save my ass with these-

@bluethepearldiver

@superstaridolstart

@anemonether

@gummybonebanes

@deepseazombie

@eggchjf

@sweetpie2612

And to all who took the time outta their lives to read my insane ramblings- thank you all so much from the bottom of my heart! Genuinely, without each and every one of you guys, I wouldn't have pulled through with all these! I promise I will do my best for y'all!

And to those reading, I highly recommend reading through PokeManiacal's blog posts that talk about the characters of Pokemon, how they are affected by the narrative, and vice-versa, as well as the Judgemental Critter's own video essays surrounding the witches from Madoka Magica; it is thanks to their respective works that I've managed to capture the characters' true depths and what goes on during the design process of a witch.

So, with all that being said, I just have to thank you all once more- from the very pits and the deepest trenches of my heart, thank you all so much! For the support, for the resources, for hearing me ramble on for days or even months on end- thank you, thank you!! I cannot emphasize how much I hold you all dear- oh my god ;0; Please, to those reading this post, it'd be best if you poured your support to those mentioned- frankly, they deserve most of the praise ;w;

Once again, I must praise you all for the support you have all granted me, and bow; it was a wild ride, but I'm happy that we've gone so far. Thank you all for everything, darlings- may all your journeys be blessed by the deities you all hold dear, if any, and for the fame and glory you all deserve arrive your way. Truly, I am indebted to you all.

Thank you all- have a good night, and I bid you all Alola!

[smokingtiger]

more FESTA ship discourse and delusion...

The number of shipping and delusional posts I have seen in regard to the FESTA APOBANGPO project video.... some of y'all need serious help.

I have seen people saying that BigHit purposely arranged the members in a way to promote certain ships... are you actually for real right now? If you see a few members standing next to one another and immediately assume that it's for a ship, that is a YOU problem.

Have any of you taken school photos before? Stood in a choir? Had to create a formation for sports pictures? Sometimes -- and I know this is going to sound soooo crazy -- but just sometimes, companies and/or organizations arrange people within photos to fit whatever creative vision they had. BTS have arranged themselves into a certain order on red carpets, it's clear that perhaps they have a set formation that they like to utilize for professional photos...

Like, if BTS have photoshoots, their stylists usually pick their outfits. If they have subunits, their stylists will usually choose outfit pieces to complement one another. NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT SHIPPING. It's not always boyfriend clothes! I swear this obsession with who's-fucking-who has infected some of your minds like a brain-eating amoeba.

(and I have stated MANY times in the past that I don't mind shipping, I don't care if you think a pair is real... but this type of obsession or hatred is not okay)

Can BTS members, who have been friends for well over a decade now, not stand next to each other without constantly being hyper-analyzed and made to be enemies of other members because you want one pair to come true? This is not normal behavior, this is lunacy.

Seriously... what the hell is wrong with some of you people?

Each member is known to be pretty affectionate with one another, so who cares if Taehyung rested his head on Jungkook's? Have any of you sat with a friend before and draped yourself on them? I'm seriously convinced some of you have never had friends in your entire life. That does not mean the company is trying to shove taekook down your throat... this is getting ridiculous. Some of these accusations are actually just hateful comments towards the boys. You guys despise a ship so much that you're literally projecting onto the close friendship of REAL people. Just because YOU hate Jikook, or Vmin, or Namgi -- whatever the fuck it is -- does not mean Jungkook hates Jimin, or that Taehyung is fighting with Yoongi over Jin... like do you not see how stupid this is?

BTS: We're actually really close friends, I don't know what I'd do without these guys. I hope we can be together for a long time. Delusional and hateful shipper: Actually, Jungkook hates Jimin because the company forces them to do fanservice and he is actually in love with Taehyung... Taehyung gets super jealous and constantly wants Jimin out of their life! Just because Taehyung says Jimin is his best friend and that he's written several songs about him and their close relationship does not mean they're actually best friends. But me, a literal stranger on the internet who probably doesn't even speak Korean... I know wayyy more about their relationship than they do!

THIS IS WHAT YOU GUYS SOUND LIKE! YOU DON'T EVEN TRY TO HIDE THAT YOU'RE BEING AN ANTI!

Can we not just appreciate OT7 content? Like, we haven't seen them together in such a long time and you guys have found a way to ruin something extremely special. Please stop projecting, please stop accusing members of lying, and for god's sake, please stop telling other people that the BTS members fucking hate each other.

Take Two comes out tonight! Please focus this rabid behavior on something productive, like streaming a song the members have been waiting to release for months.

Happy FESTA!

[dxwnfxll]

Hey it's me again! I loved what you made last time so i'd like to make another request. Can i request any member of the foundation or scp with a reader who is really good at analyzing people and remembering there habits. They also know things about people instinctively by studying there body language or just guessing. And they are almost distressingly good at it, they know when you lie, they know when you haven't done something, they know when somethings wrong and are great guessing the problem. Like "mister i know you didn't take your meds this morning! You go do that!" or "oh hi is something wrong? You seem off". They also instinctively know things that most psychologists would take a while to diagnose. Like "oh sweetie I always knew you were gay, i could never imagine you getting with someone of the opposite gender", or "yeah i know you're autistic honey, it's just in the way you act". Like they are literally the lady in this video https://www.youtube.com/shorts/v_v918l58Rg

Thank you! Seriously though you are awesome!

Trying my best to make this, if i get anything wrong pls do tell!

Dr. Shaw (again Genderfluid + all of these will be semi romantic lolol)

-You and Elias have been together for awhile, but even before you two became a thing you seemed to always notice one specific thing about him.

-No matter how badly he tried to hide her depression you always seemed to be really good at guessing when they were depressed.

-he didn't hate it, but she always felt..weird about it. He was so used to just being known as the 'chaotic funny guy' that it was weird when someone pointed out their depression.

-that wasn't really the only thing you were observant about either, you seemed to always be able to tell when he was having a bad day.

-and honestly..he loved that, she loved finally having a support and being allowed to finally lean on someone. Finally able to 'be herself' in a sense.

Dr. Clef

-Clef has always been the secretive type, not cause he wants to...okay maybe it is cause he wants to.

-Clef doesn't exactly like many people knowing much about him, so when you popped up able to see right through him..he hated it.

-no..hate is a lesser word for this..he despised it.

-He despised you being able to tell when he's having a bad day, or when he's upset.

-he despised you somehow already knowing he was Pan, he despised you somehow knowing he didn't take his meds and BRINGING THEM TO HIM??

-...but through all that hate..he felt something else. He knew what it was and he was scared of it, especially with how you were.

-he started to..like you, and like you being how you were. But he still kept up his 'hate' for you.

-as much as he wants to lean on you and cry about everything, he stays far FAR away from you. He's got a reputation to uphold and he refuses to let anyone see him as 'weak'

Dr. Glass

-Glass is similar to you in a way, He's able to see right through people..but not as much as you are.

-Glass is usually able to see through people after therapy sessions, no matter how much they try to hide Glass can see right through them.

-When he had a therapy session with you he just couldn't..see through you, but you could see right through him.

-at first it kinda freaked him out, but then it made him happy. Finally! Someone with his own skill!

-he tried to convince you to be a therapist but you didn't really seem to budge.

-as Glass worked with you, happy to finally have someone who can see through him as he sees through others he felt something.

-a spark of love for you, and he certainly didn't try to hide it. He knew you'd find out, and he was happy when you did.

Dr. Kondraki

-similar to Clef the man doesn't exactly like when someone knows 'too much' about him

-he'd rather everyone ignore him then come up to him and KNOW he's depressed. How the hell did you even know?

-well okay actually maybe it was a no brainer with his eye bags and numb looking face..plus the alcoholism. So he shrugged it off eventually.

-but when you came to his office after a meeting with some coffee, somehow knowing he hadn't had coffee. It made him a lil suspicious of you.

-first he thought you were some anomaly, then he just grew a semi hatred for you after finding out you were uh 'normal' and just had a talent for looking through people.

-he stays away from you, refuses to go near you. Though he can't help but like you a little bit..especially when you bring him coffee.

Mikell Shaw

-Mikell is very similar to Clef, he doesn't like anyone knowing too much about him. Especially with his job.

-When he first met you you both were agents working for the 05, he of course didn't like you at first.

-he had always thought you were some person who thought they were 'better than everyone' because of how you acted.

-But he learned you actually were just..like this? He began to kinda like it. Especially when you began to notice things about him

-what he didn't like was you somehow knowing almost everything about him, how he was feeling that day, how he hadn't had coffee yet, how he had forgotten his gun.

-It drove him crazy, YOU drove him crazy.

-He pretty much tries to stay away from you similar to Kondraki, and luckily his 05 job really helps

073-Cain

-Cain has been 'alone' for a very long time now, He's gotten used to the feeling of never really having anyone that can understand his pain.

-He's so used to everyone around him saying he's lucky and thinking he's lucky..assuming he's happy about being immortal.

-so when you came in, and seemed to immediately sense his sadness

-he just stared at you in awe, it wasn't rare for someone to ask if he's okay..but that was only when he showed his sadness.

-you saw his bright smiling face and seemed to just instantly know, he seemed to adore you for that

-he likes having someone around that can see right through him, someone that just..knows y'know?

035

-035 has lived his entire life around people oblivious to how he is.

-no ones ever been able to 'look through him' in fact he's been the one to look through others

-He's lived life pretty happily without all that..well until *you* came along.

-you were his new researcher, he was so excited to manipulate yet another person

-as you interviewed him he audibly gasped as you said something, something he never expected people to know about him

-"you were once important weren't you? That's why you act like this right?"

-035 seemed to freeze before clearing 'his throat' "what game are you playing at."

-he starts acting aggressive towards you, the more you seem to know scares him

-eventually though he seemed to..miss you? He seemed to request you often even tho during those times he always acted rude towards you

-in truth he was almost happy? To have someone 'see through him', but he'll never openly admit it

-you definitely freak him out a few times as well whenever you say something about him.

049

-049 similar to Cain has been alone for awhile, he hasn't really had anyone he can talk to and seem to just know what's wrong

-well..there was that fellow that one time, but that was so long ago.

-But then you showed up, a JR researcher working with a fellow named Gears.

-He just expected you to be like so many other researchers, ask questions, write things down and then leave.

-but you seemed to actually chat with him, and then he heard it

-"You seem sad today, are you okay 049?"

-He stared into your eyes not even answering you, he didn't know how to answer..no one had ever really asked about him let alone know what was wrong

-"I'm..fine. Thank you Doctor."

-He requests you a lot after that, requests you two have daily talks and 'tea time'

-he likes spending time with you and he doesn't mind you being so 'observant'

-he likes it, he likes someone actually knowing about him.

If you want me to add more characters i will! Lol enjoy!! Edited finally lol

[carolmunson]

‘weird couple be weird and have a painful complicated love story’

a love story? she’s a child…

i'll answer this only because i have thoughts. firstly, i'm not out here advocating for 30 year olds to be in relationships or sleeping with 18 year olds. i'm 31 myself and the thought involved romantically with a teenager makes me want to gag. i'm even not totally comfortable with 18 year olds reading my content or interacting with it. however, what i'm excited about is a film being made that examines the intensity and detriment of infatuationships based on trauma and trauma bonding. i haven't seen the film, but from what i've read -- they're connection is not so much based on michael wanting to be with maria because she's a teenager, but because they both have trauma that mirrors each other and that creates a bond and visceral understanding of each other that isn't healthy but feels right and wrong at the same time. it's not healthy or good but it's intense. their age gap seems to be the LEAST of the fucked up things about their bond. i'm looking forward to the weird visceral visuals that sort of physically depict the discomfort of trauma and mentall ilness and how those things feel inside and bringing them outside. i'm someone who has been in a relationship like that (and i was younger than maria when it started, my partner wasn't 30 but he had a lot more life experience than i had due to his own trauama despite being 17, i was 15 and lost my virginity to him) and i weirdly feel like the movie will be healing for me and so yes, i'm looking forward to a short lived burst of a complicated shitty 'love story' (which is probably not the right word to use to describe it) based solely off infatuation and the desperate need to feel understood. i dont think enough art depicts relationships that are unusual and morally gray and emotionally volatile and unhealthy and gritty -- not everything in the world makes sense or is perfect or is morally good. and again, i haven't seen the movie. my thoughts could change once i see it. but if you're wondering, no, i don't think michael is a hot sexy character and i don't think they should be together. i don't think them being together is romantic or something to aspire to. no matter what happens, they are, one: both obviously not emotionally or mentally well, and two: they will never be on the same page of their lives. despite how emotionally stunted michael might be. if maria was my sister and was like 'i'm seeing this 30 year old' i would swiftly direct her in a different direction. but i think that it's a story that is worth telling and i'm really looking forward to getting to watch it and analyze it. and of course see jq be someone other than eddie munson. i don't plan on writing fics for hoard or about michael only because it seems like his character is way more emotionally heavy than i'd like to write for or explore. he's not a good guy, he's not someone that interests me beyond a complex character in a movie i want to see.

[lyriumlullaby-ao3]

okay hi friends, i’m home from school and i have just enough brain power to talk about

Mythal and the creation of the Blight ✨

those of you who’ve been reading my meta lately may recall that i said i had theories about this. we’re gonna dive into them now :)

if you’ve never taken Solas to the Temple of Mythal, you need to—it opens up SO much dialogue, including a discussion of the TONS of statues and representations of the Dread Wolf inside the temple. I'm not going to go super in depth about that content here, i'm saving it for another post, but the important thing to note here is that depictions of the Dread Wolf are literally EVERYWHERE in there. i haven't counted, but i'd be willing to bet there's more imagery of him than any other 'god' besides Mythal herself.

and in the game's epilogue scene and Trespasser, we get a taste of Solas'/the Dread Wolf's relationship to Mythal. It's a bit obscured as to the nature of that relationship (again, stuff for a different post!), but they're obviously quite close, with warm (if complex) feelings towards one another.

for those who haven’t read Tevinter Nights (one, you should if you get the chance, it’s fantastic), there’s a short story contained within called "Dread Wolf Take You" written by our very fave, Patrick Weekes. now, i’m not gonna spoil anything there, but there's some important discussion of the red lyrium idol found in the deep roads during DA2. here’s what it looks like, in detail, for those who’ve forgotten:

[source]

In that same short story, this idol is described as "two lovers [embracing], or a god mourning her sacrifice." there is also a point in that piece where it comes out that Solas considers this idol to be “his.” okay... why?

i think it's because it depicts himself and Mythal. not a stretch with the imagery, right? and i'm not inclined to think they were lovers, at least not anymore. they might have been, but if so, it wasn't the core aspect of their relationship in my eyes. i'll explore that in more detail later on in another post as well. so this leads me to the consideration of 'a god mourning her sacrifice.' (and this, only because i'm inclined to follow the breadcrumbs given us by bioware, especially Patrick Weekes. they're good at weaving stories, as has been pointed out by other users talking about their discussion of what a good story twist is. god i CANNOT find the post?? pls if you see it send it my way bc i feel bad for mentioning it but not linking it.)

in the Temple of Mythal, we learn from Abelas that Mythal was killed, "murdered," as he describes it, and this is confirmed by Solas in Trespasser. Solas says the other gods killed her. now, i'm uncertain about whether this is literal or a metaphor, but i don't think it much matters. i'll explore both views as i keep analyzing and you can decide for yourself.

so here's what i think: i've mentioned before that i believe the Blight to be a biological weapon created by the Evanuris during their war with the Titans. it was specifically created to infect Titans and corrupt/destroy them. this is why we end up with lyrium that has the blight, red lyrium. and here's where we get into the part that's still a bit fuzzy to me. i'm going to lay out a few possible scenarios, but there are certainly more, so if you see something i've missed, please do add on!! i'm going to offer these in the order of what i think is least to most likely.

scenario one: the Evanuris (possibly lead by Elgar'nan, although that's not really important,) create a horrible biological weapon that will infect the physical world, but leave the spiritual untouched. there is no Veil yet at this point in time, so this is an aspect of its engineering, not a feature of the world's structure. they need a blood sacrifice to complete its construction, the sacrifice of a living being (or beings) to finish it and send it off to destroy the world. they decide on Mythal, storm her temple, and murder her to complete the weapon. (this would follow with a few of the things Abelas says at the Well of Sorrows: "[Mythal] was slain, if a god truly can be. Betrayed by those who destroyed this temple.") Solas casts the Veil to prevent the Blight's release, sealing the Evanuris away and locking whatever 'warhead' the Blight is contained within in "the Golden City," which i believe was Arlathan, behind the Veil. this warhead then corrupts the city, blackening it, and accounting for what Corypheus describes when he and the other Magisters Sidereal breach the Veil and enter this supposedly "Golden City" only to find it tainted and empty.

scenario two: where everything is the same, except the Evanuris plan to sacrifice many lives, likely those of slaves, and Mythal instead intervenes. there is a legend told of a time when Elgar'nan and Falon'Din were going to war over some argument, and Mythal interceded, suggesting they resolve the conflict with a single champion each, rather than sending their many soldiers to their deaths. They did so, and thus Mythal saved the lives of untold thousands. What if she did the same here? What if she offered to die for the cause instead of sending an untold number of slaves to their deaths? Perhaps there was something about her form, her body, her power, that made her blood more potent and thus other sacrifices were unneeded? i like this one slightly more than the first, because of the way Weekes describes the red lyrium idol as an image of Mythal's sacrifice. But this still leaves us without a way to account for the destruction of her temple, if she went willingly. which leads me to...

scenario three: my personal favorite theory. the Evanuris create this weapon, despite protests from Mythal, and are prepared to kill her to get their way if they must. Elgar'nan is notoriously ruthless in this way, and if he was indeed the ring leader, as i suspect he was, this is very plausible to me. completing the weapon may or may not have required a blood sacrifice all the same--if it didn't, no problem, but if it did, perhaps the sacrifice of many slaves was still the plan. this matters little to this scenario, as you'll see in a moment. Mythal goes to Solas, a trusted friend, a favored companion, however you see their relationship. (i'll get to that in my next meta, i promise, so no spoilers on what i think!!) She knows of a way to stop them, and she knows it requires blood magic, a life sacrificed. She would never ask another to die for something like this, and so she offers herself. Solas is horrified, but knows she is right, and that this is the only way. Mythal kills herself, and Solas uses the power of her blood to cast the Veil, separating the world of spirits from the physical world. the Evanuris breach Mythal's temple in search of her, and, finding it empty, desecrate and destroy it, until they find themselves caught in the wake of the Veil coming down. i like this theory best because it accounts for all the pieces: Weekes' use of the term "sacrifice" for Mythal, Abelas' description of Mythal's death (mostly, if we take the term "murder" metaphorically, in that she was forced into a situation by others where she had to die against her will), and Solas' attitudes towards blood magic. recall that he says it's a tool like any other, and when it's used to gain power, that's wrong, but it need not always be evil. and note that he says he's never bothered to learn it (possibly a lie, he tells many of those) because it makes it harder to access the Fade. now, to the matter of if the blood sacrifice was still needed to release the weapon... maybe it was. and if so, perhaps that's part of how the Magisters Sidereal unintentionally released it upon the world, as they were said to have sacrificed "slaves beyond counting" (Canticle of Silence 2:2) in order to breach the Fade. So either way, it seems the sacrifice requirement was fulfilled.

in all of these scenarios, it's worth pointing out that the Evanuris, if they're smart (which, don't they have to be at least a little, to get to where they are?), must have some way to separate their spiritual selves from their physical forms in order to avoid the Blight when it is unleashed. I have more to say about this, but it's better left to my next post. :) so for now, just stay tuned on that, but the point here is, if they have done so in preparation for the release of the weapon, wouldn't that make it awfully easy and convenient to seal them away from the physical world entirely?

so, with all that said, stuff that still needs exploring in future meta:

Solas' nature. A spirit? A demon? A god? Just some fucking guy trying to do the right thing? I'll talk about this next time. :)

Solas' and Mythal's relationship! Also something that will go in my next meta post.

writing this also gave me ideas about the Evanuris and the Old Gods that i'm going to talk more about. i'm pretty sure i made a post especially about this already? and if so perhaps i'll rewrite it, but it may have been an addition on someone else's post, in which case i'm going to make my own!

plus a few other assorted things featuring Cullen, Cole, and dwarves! (not all at once. sorry lol)

in summary, the Blight's a biological weapon, and that's why Mythal died/was murdered and Solas cast the Veil and sundered the world. <3

[morimakesfanart]

Hey I was always wondering what made Magi to be one of your favourite anime’s and how did Sinbad become your comfort character so much so that you made a fic about it?

Love Sindria’s Prophet

I went into a bit of this here where I talked about my favorite arcs in the franchise.

Here's the full version:

How Magi came into my life UwU: Me and Lyly started watching Magi independently around the same time. Our mom had just died and I was having a ton of issues with theft in the Miraculous fandom, so we were both looking for something new. A friend recommended Magi to me saying that Morgiana had a similar name to me and acted like me. (She's very autistic with PTSD coded.) I found out about halfway through season 1 that Lyly was also watching it because they messaged me "Sorry about the purple guy." They took one look at Sinbad and knew I'd fall for him. I'd even say they were more into Magi than me at the start though since they had already been hyper fixating on different translations of 1000 Arabian Nights for several months.

We watched it separately, and together. We spent a ton of time analyzing the characters, world, and story. It's rare to see an anime centered on the middle east, and the magic systems worked with physics instead of against it so there was a lot to explore. We agreed that Sinbad and Ja'far's dynamic was a lot like ours; it was like looking at the two of us if we had managed to break out of the abusive situation we were stuck in much sooner. Our free time became us talking about what we might be like in that world, and what our adventures would be like. Then Lyly found The Adventures manga and it just gave us more to talk about and explore. Sadly, the differences between the Adventures manga and anime were to great for Lyly and it broke their hyperfixation on the franchise. They still like it, but their engagement ended there; they haven't finished either manga, but they do let me talk about it at nauseum.

Why Sinbad became my main comfort character: I know I mentioned in an ask before that Yunan is technically closer to my type than Sinbad, but Sinbad is the pattern I keep repeating -especially when it comes to anime crushes. I really like the Prince & Gentle types, but they have to have Main Character Competence TM. Gorgeous, confident, kickass, and kind when it matters. For some reason that means I keep ending up attracted to characters that are revealed to be flirts. I swear I thought Sinbad was just a competent moron teacher type when I fell for him. Even though he was a bit egotistical he was also very compassionate for the people around him, and -at least in the Balbadd arc- seemed willing to help the next generation instead of forcing his ways onto them. (He was impressed Alibaba's solutions even though they were different than his, and respected Alibaba for making them.)

Even after finding out that Sin was a womanizer, I saw that he was attentive to those he is using, and when he is done with them it's obvious, so his targets get a clean break. My Ex was a coward that refused to end things himself even when he was done with me. So while I was going through the breakup, I hyperfixated on Sinbad harder because he treats his partners better than I was. Even if I fell for Sinbad's manipulation, I knew that he'd treat me right while he needed me, and when he would be done with me he'd send me off and stop talking to me. I wouldn't be dragged around by my nose for months when I was going through one of the hardest times of my life. Sinbad is never shown flirting with someone in a bad mental place, anyone like that he would help heal (which could just be more manipulation, but he'd still be helping them get back on their feet).

And then I read Adventures. Sinbad's childhood put him through severe parentification like me. And in the the Slave Arc Sinbad went through more similar abuse to what I grew up in. There was no going back for me. I related to Sinbad so much at the start because how he responds to stressors is the same as me, so seeing him also have a past similar to mine made me feel seen in a way I hadn't felt before. It also explained why Sinbad seemed so trauma informed from the beginning.

Here's an exert from my current draft of Ch38 that explains how I felt:

When I had originally read this arc, it carved Sinbad into my heart. It made me think, 'This person would understand me.'

(Mori is working on Fate scrolls in the scene. Honestly, I'm happy I finally have a place to put this scene. I originally wrote it nearly a year ago.)

The biggest difference between me and Sinbad was that I grew out of my illusions of grandeur through middle and high school. It went hand and hand with realizing that what I was going through was abuse. I only had one person to protect, not a whole country's worth. Who knows, maybe if I was under that much pressure I would have slipped back into it like how Sinbad did after Zepar's dungeon arc. I know I some times get close when things get bad. The confidence it brings can be both addicting and reassuring when you need to be able to make quick or life changing decisions.

But yeah... I hope that answered your question in enough detail :3

Thank you for liking Sindria's Prophet so much! I'm finally working on the art for Ch37. It will probably only have maybe 3 art pieces, but 2 of them will be comics so I think that's okay.

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Hello, 16yo girl here. I had been questioning what my MBTI type was between ENTP and INTP for quite a long time - I had known that Ti and Ne were always at the top of my stack, but not which one was stronger... until yesterday, when I reflected back on my sheltered upbringing and I came to the conclusion that I was an ENTP, just one with very marked introvert tendencies and possible developmental delays due to combination of a stifled dominant function and possibly autism.

That stifling of Ne is also probably why I have only become more reclusive as time went on - I spent most of my time as a child either at school, the same small private school I've been going to since 1st grade, or at home, mostly on my computer. While in the surface my time on the internet allowed me to have easy access to novelty, it is still doing the same thing over and over again on a grander scale.

Meanwhile, I never managed to truly "fit in" at school, and after starting to make amends with my old friends at the end of sixth grade the pandemic happened, which pretty much meant that the only thing I'd be doing for two years was basically staring at screens all day. Once I returned back to school, I started feeling 'othered' again, and even as I found out it was partially over my own immaturity, I still feel like I will not actually become part of the group right now, that I should just grind it out until it ends, that college, due to the new environment and size will be the time I'll truly begin to shine - further proven by how excited I was when I went to one of the unis I was considering's open day recently.

Meanwhile, my ISTJ mother won't stop comparing me negatively to my brother and on how he was so similar to her in personality compared to me, always implying that I turned out "off" in some way or another, even if she's usually well-meaning.

Thoughts?

-----------------------

I don't guess at type. You've only speculated about one possible function, which is nowhere near enough info to draw any kind of sound conclusion. I generally won't comment on type assessment unless people follow the instructions on the contact page to submit a proper profile of themselves. In short, I won't have any "thoughts" if you don't give me enough to analyze.

You've basically described typical adolescent adjustment issues that anyone of any type can suffer. It is not uncommon for teens to have trouble fitting in. Why? Because they are still in the process of learning good social skills. When you're at the "beginner" level of learning anything, your ideas tend to be very primitive or crude. Thus, from the teenage perspective, socializing often boils down to the idea of "approval", which is taken to mean EITHER be like everyone else OR be an outsider.

Either/or thinking is a form of illogical thinking that creates a false dichotomy, essentially reducing your world to only two possibilities. You said that not being able to find your group right now, maybe it would be better to just leave it until college - once again, your world only has two possibilities. This kind of oversimplified thinking is normal in children and teens, but it is considered a sign of cognitive immaturity in adults (as their thinking hasn't evolved since adolescence). It's not something for you to be concerned about but, rather, something to be aware of and gradually improved upon.

When compared to full-formed adults, young people (<25) are limited in several ways:

They lack life experience, so they haven't had enough time to learn all the knowledge and skills they need to live life well.

They lack cognitive resources to understand complexity because the brain hasn't reached physical maturity yet.

They lack emotional resources to cope with difficulty because the brain is still feeling the effects of changes that began in puberty.

They might also lack confidence due to too many environmental factors being out of their control.

They might also lack direction due to not having access to enough learning resources they need for self-development.

They might also lack purpose due to not having enough access to positive role models, guides, or mentors to help them see the bigger picture of life.

I mention these things not to make teens feel shamed and ashamed for what they naturally lack, but to make them aware of where their potential lies. Your "weaknesses" are just as important for realizing your greater human potential as your "strengths". Weaknesses make plenty of room for learning, development, change, growth, evolution, and transformation... BUT this is assuming you know how to confront weaknesses in the right way. So, reflect: How have you responded to your weaknesses, as signaled through your mistakes and failures?

How do you respond to lack of life experience? Do you keep it that way by locking yourself away? Do you waste your time with trivial experiences? Do you seek out meaningful learning experiences?

How do you respond to lack of cognitive resources for understanding complexity? Do you just reduce everything into oversimplistic ideas? Do you avoid complex situations? Do you study them to grow your understanding? Do you get help for understanding them?

How do you respond to lack of emotional resources for handling difficulty? Do you numb yourself? Do you run or escape from negative feelings? Do you seek appropriate help and support? Do you set out to learn healthy coping skills and strategies?

How do you respond to lack of confidence? Do you shit-talk yourself more and more? Do you write off your future? Do you assert more independence? Do you take more control whenever possible? Do you improve your knowledge, skills, and capabilities?

How do you respond to lack of direction? Do you give up on yourself? Do you resign yourself to the status quo? Do you learn how to make better decisions for yourself? Do you learn how to set and achieve more fulfilling goals?

How do you respond to lack of purpose? Do you settle for less? Do you resign yourself to being small? Do you ignore existential pain? Do you seek answers? Do you set higher aspirations? Do you commit yourself to greater ideals?

Adjustment issues are very likely to get expressed through auxiliary development problems. Since you're unsure about your type, the most I can say is that healthy Ti encourages people to 1) analyze and learn from mistakes/failures, and 2) identify and acquire the knowledge/skills required to eventually succeed. If your response to failure is dismissal, evasion, withdrawal, or avoidance, it means you are choosing to get stuck at a low level of competency indefinitely.

If you are able to get past the beginner level in socializing, you'll start to realize the false dichotomy and how self-sabotaging it really is. Socializing is much more nuanced and complex than "insider vs outsider", and there are more options available than "conform vs rebel". This raises the question of what other options are available to you - it is a question for your Ne to answer.

Yes, it's true that you can't be friends with everyone. But you don't need to be friends with everyone, do you? You only need a handful of close friends who understand you in order to have a satisfying social life. They don't have to come from school or the usual places. They can come through other activities. They can come from all demographics or backgrounds.

Growing up in a small environment puts you in danger of thinking too small all the time. The key is you have to recognize that the world is a big place, so you have to start putting yourself out there to find the friends of best fit. The more people you meet, the more you increase your odds of success. Whether you try now or later isn't the right point to focus on. You're not going to find what you're looking for as long as: you don't actually get up to look, you have absolutely no system or plan for proceeding, and/or you don't have the skills to keep relationships even when you do find good people. You need real-life social experience if you want to improve your social skills. The sooner you get started, the better. It's unrealistic to think that you'll magically be great at relationships just because you started college.

I know options can be limited at your age but 16 is generally the age when teens really start to venture out into the world on their own (without parents/guardians). In many places, you can drive and work at 16. You can start exploring places you've never been to around town. You can join more extracurricular activities/clubs that would put you in contact with people beyond your school. I shouldn't have to tell an ENTP to go out and explore, as you should simply follow your natural Ne motivation. If that motivation is absolutely nowhere to be found, then perhaps reconsider your type.

[doubledyke]

3, 7, 9, 14, 15, 17, 22 >:3

hey thanks!

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr:

i def don't have a screenshot of anything related to eene. i can't even really think of any on tumblr but the goddamn eene subreddit can be soooo cancerous. i don't follow it but it shows up in my feed bc i visited it once, but then i'll come across some goofy ass shit that compels me to click and the cycle starts again. but generally ONE of the worst takes on any site is that eddy would grow up to be a schlubby bozo in a trench coat selling Stiff Rox behind a middle school or similar takes. he would be very well dressed while peddling his wares, thank you very much.

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?:

the only character i really dislike for any reason is jonny. he's so goddamn annoying to me. i know that's the point, so kudos to david avalon lol. if anything, an interesting fandom interpretation could probably change my view of him. but yeah i definitely think he has some really funny lines and gags, but overall he's pretty boring and obnoxious. with basically everyone else, i can see the appeal or at least the potential for something interesting. back in the dark ages (2014) i feel like i had a moment where i got pretty tired of the way edd was made out to be such a mary sue that i might have gotten annoyed by him or that idea of him at the very least. i admittedly take my own liberties when "analyzing" him, but as with all the eds, he's a complex character. the edd fan girls who'd have him pickin' daisies while eddy murders innocents drove me crazy.

9. worst part of canon:

i've never given it much thought, but i'd probably say it would be kanker related. i really love the kankers, even with the limited info we have on them. i just love unhinged girls/women. i would have loved to have seen them get some sort of arc and have a purpose outside of their roles as boy crazy "trailer trash". if there were ever a spin off, i'd hope it would be about them and their insane home life.

14. that one thing you see in fics all the time:

i'm a terrible fan; i haven't read a fic in a long time for whatever reason. they're all in my "rainy day" stash since eene related content is a limited resource. i don't know that there's any one thing or a pattern i've noticed in multiple fics from different people. however, one thing i LOVE is seeing people write slapstick into their fics. i think it's so fucking cool and interesting. everyone in this fandom is so damn multi-talented i could scream.

15. that one thing you see in fanart all the time:

i guess probably giving eddy blue hair, or giving edd long hair, which i love! edd doesn't seem like the type to have long hair, but somehow it's so damn fitting. idk where blue haired eddy started but its fanon at this point and i'm down. but i love his 3 strange antennae as well.

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art:

unfortunately again, i'm the worst person to answer this bc i have no idea what all is out there in regards to fics. but i'd love to see some good stories about the eds in high school dealing with their new found and fleeting "acceptance" from the other kids.

i'd also love to see more stories that have all three eds living under one roof as adults and all the insanity that would ensue. i want to write about this one in particular, so hopefully i'll be able to come up with a cohesive plot at some point.

would also love some eddeddy drama like them breaking up 👀 they get back together of course because they're the only two idiots who will deal with each other's bullshit

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores:

edd's giant chin

[techramonic]

what's your favorite film/what are your favorite films?

I love these kind of questions ... thank you Wisteria, you are a lifesaver.

I have been procrastinating in answering my asks but this question whispered into my ear and told me to answer it as soon as possible just so I can yap about my favorite movies. I purposefully left out Zero Day and Elephant because although those two are part of my favorite films because the characters and themes are really interesting to analyze, and yea sure I have analyzed them a heck lot, they haven't really profoundly impacted me as much as the one's below. Never really struck me on a personal, personal level. If the movie's good then it'll lead to an astral projection and you're suddenly hyper-aware of everything you feel me ... I'd say that the following are my favorite films, not in any particilar order:

Donnie Darko | This movie has been etched into my brain permanently and will be ingrained on it long as I stay awake. I could explain almost every detail behind it. From the religious symbolism, to the intricacy of the plot, to the nature of Donnie's character. I recall that the first time I watched it, the initial confusion sent me into a spiral of research and more re-watches. It's just that type of film where the more you watch it again, the more you find more small details that change the whole trajectory of the story. For my school projects that involved creatve writing, I always chose to talk about this film in my essays because of the themes. There's something about existential dread and religious tragedy that makes me so alive. The mystery of man's fate and existence keeps me up at night. Donnie's me and I'm him. When he said, "Every living creature dies alone." I felt that shit in skin, bones, viscera, and soul.

Dead Poet's Society | First ever movie that actually changed my life. My first viewing of it in 2019 made me feel so inspired but still left me empty after realizing that perhaps some people are born for their passions but because of the circumstances they're enslaved to, they are only left to dream. It makes me want to fight the air. Plus, I see myself in Todd. I love poetry and I know the burden of being pressured to follow the footsteps of success of an older sibling, even if all you want to do is exist and find the joy in doing what others consider to be useless.

Fantastic Mr. Fox | Wes Anderson is such a great director but when he makes animations it's like the world is slowly healing back into crescendo. This film makes me so happy for every reason there is. I love the themes of greed which is being told through the prespective of animals. Just reflects our innate human nature to be so attracted to greed and power that it slowly consumes then inevitably destroys us. Also, I love "different" characters... Ash save me, save me ash.

Mysterious Skin | Watched this once and it made me sick. I had to think about for an hour. Fuck, humanity is so morbid. So facinating. So hopeful yet decayed. I hope their coach died or something, sick motherfucker. Gregg Araki has an insane amount of skill in making the best emotionally complex and gut-wrenching queer films ever. I also liked the use of Aliens in the film because I personally love Alien things. Used to be a big fan of sStar Trek too when I was younger. I love you Brian Lackey, you are the world.

Azure et Asmar | I love Middle Eastern films. Brings me back to my youth. It's like it sends me back to the past and allows me to relive some of the memories I wish never passed. Wish I could've stayed there longer typa thing. This movie is so beautiful. So playful and childish yet grown and thoughtful at the same time. I love films about family too, can you guys tell ... Watching this film was such a happy experience and everything about it was pleasant. I even learned the lyrics to one of the songs just because I loved it so much.

Trainspotting | Fucking insane and brilliant. This film is so exhilarating and like DPS, so inspiring yet too fucked up that it just makes me question is life really worth it. Is living really something we should do or are we just killing the time and seeing it as an obligation rather than a will ... The monologue Renton gives during the start and end is so good that I need to get it tatted on my skin or injected into my veins.

[noemitenshi]

if you don't have any thoughts feel free to to ignore this but I've always been obsessed with Troy's face after madison hits him with the hammer the first time and he falls to his knees and I was wondering if you also had anything to say about it?

bc I'm like, it feels like he's just accepting what's happening and that makes me feel so sad but also maybe he's not feeling much of anything bc he's just been bashed in the head and is in shock or maybe he feels kinda betrayed that madison did that too him. idk idk I'm just obsessed with his expression in that moment

Hi, nonny,

and of course im not just gonna ignore your question (and what an interesting question it is)! Especially since I am honored that you're asking my opinion <3 Also, there's two things you need to know about me - 1) i love to discuss all things Troy and 2) in case I haven't yet thought thoroughly about a specific scene (which, at this point seems almost impossible - I have been obsessed with analyzing every little twitch of Mister Otto for over 2 years now) getting asked a question will make me do that. That's just how my brain is wired. (and incidentally, I honestly haven't thought about this scene a lot because well… I was working hard to ignore that this is canon hahahaahah so yeah)

Ok so without looking at that scene again, the way i recall it, i think he was surprised/dibelieving. Maybe there was betrayal there but… somehow i don't quite remember that. What I do remember though is that through that whole bit (starting from "Now look at us. One big blended family" up until she hit him) i was very much reminded of what Emilia Clarke, the actress of Daenerys from Game of Thrones said about her dying scene, namely that she played Daenerys almost childlike there (i may be misremembering her actual words. it was showing Daenerys' innocence and sweetness though in a way) and that's what Troy also read to me in this scene. Just very earnest and almost sweet (for, like, Troy you know) - yes even with him going "I'd do it all again". Even that part was.. naive. That's what he was, the poor guy.

Anyway, let's look at the scene. First in its entirety haha.

And now that I'm watching this I can't believe I haven't been obsessing over it, the way he looks does have something very very precious about it. Like maybe the wide-eyed expression (maybe the fact he's on his knees) maybe the way he almost looks at her like she's his savior (sadly she isn't)… top-notch expression, thank you for making me spend time with it!

Ok next let's split it up.

I think in the first half of him looking at her all the things I've said above are encompassed. He does look surprised and also disbelieving, almost begging, if you ask me. But thennn the second half happens

and.. I'm not quite sure what this expression is but you know, it could very well be him accepting his fate (especially that mouth movement there). Him accepting, ok he went too far in this, ok, apparently she doesn't like hearing this, ok apparently this is how he dies (yes i'm ignoring Troy coming back, just, let me have this).

I also do believe that Troy knew it was a dangerous thing to confess ("i'd do it all again, and you would, too, you know you would...") and that he did want absolution for it. He really hoped this time the people he chose as his family would be ok with him, the entirety of him. But apparently not. So maybe that last part is… defeat. Finally defeat because there's no way for him to keep fighting. He's dying. And maybe he's also relieved that he is. Just a little bit. Maybe it's not too bad that Madison did it. he died for her - probably differently than he'd have liked but still. He did. And that's a bit of alright.

(ok I went off on a tangent there haha, I can't stop myself from rambling if I tried. and to be honest, I didn't try)

I hope this is a satisfying answer to your question ^^ It was a lot of fun to think about it, so thank you very very much for it and have a great day💖