#he is also running some sort of scam

[radioconstructed]

⌖ HI, HEY, HELLO! IT’S ME, hi, I’m the problem, IT’S ME, SIMULCASTING LIVE ON AIR and LIVE ON CAMERA! I almost NEVER DO THAT! Are YOU tired of scam calls? I SURE AM! Let’s make these CLOWNS our little APRIL FOOLS! TUNE IN for WILD IMPROV, VOICE ACTING, SCAMMER MALDING, and COVERS OF THE SCAMMER PAYBACK SOUNDTRACK! ALL DAY!

[circeyoru]

Future Power Couple = Requested

The Request

[Sung Jinwoo x S-Rank Player!Reader]

! ALERT

- A new Player has joined the System.

That was months ago. You have received noticed on how well this new Player did from time to time, sounded like the System was mighty happy with this Player’s progress. Well, it wasn’t like you could do anything when you knew this person was in the same situation as yourself. While it was good that the System helped you level up to be the strongest S-Rank Hunter, you were sort of a test run for the real Player. You didn’t like being used as a trial run. 

You returned back to Korea after your exchange a bit too late. By the time you returned, the Jeju Raid ended in success with a major lost. Had you known he joined the raid, you would have joined too. Min Byung-Gyu and you were close but different, while he was the only Healer class S-Rank, you were his opposite as you were the only Assassin class S-Rank in Korea. Still, the uniqueness of your singular class among the fighter and mage class made the two of you bond like siblings with him being the other one.

So, without question, you attended his funeral. That’s when you caught a glimpse of the new S-Rank Hunter the Chairman was talking about. Sung Jinwoo, a mage class, former E-Rank and the Weakest Hunter of All Mankind. It was clear as day that he was the new Player the System noticed you all those months ago, and continuously praised. But that was all that happened, you didn’t stray away from the main objective that day and it was to honour your brother-like friend’s sacrifice and work.

“Can you join Hunter Sung to deal with a gate that appeared in the middle of the road?”

“Ha?” You side eyed the phone next to your ear. Just your luck that you were immediately given a dungeon to clear, and with Jinwoo no less. “He can handle it himself, right?” After all, he was raised by the System and leveled up to the point of gaining S-Rank. “There’s no need for me to join him.”

“You could see him in action.”

It was an enticing offer. You’ve only heard of Jinwoo’s powers and abilities, never did you see him fight or what he actually did during the Jeju Raid, since you were distraught about your friend’s death. You hummed and tapped your feet repeatedly, you want to go and don’t want to go. “Fine! Send me the location!”

Chuckles could be heard on the other side. “Haha, thank you for your work.”

Clearing a dungeon with a lack of teammates was nothing compared to what you usually do. You were the Association’s exclusive S-Rank Hunter, also known as The Underworld Assassin, due to your class and the fact that you do the Association’s dirty work. You were a feared Hunter unlike those that were treated as celebrities. 

While Jinwoo seemed to be stopped by an officer in charge of the gate, you came up behind her. “Hey, let him pass, he has permission from the Chairman.”

It was obvious that she flinched from your sudden appearance, “Huh?! Oh, yes! Please!”

“Let’s go.” You told Jinwoo without sparing him another glance. All the better if he didn’t follow behind you and you had to deal with this situation alone. Just ilke always.

To your surprise, he followed. The two of you eyed each other when you got a good look at your surrounding. No doubt thinking of the same thing. This was definitely a Red Gate. It felt like a scam and it is one.

“I can handle it on my own.” Jinwoo proudly stated while his Shadows appeared behind him.

“Yeah? Well, I was sent to clear this dungeon by the Chairman too.” You glared at him, taking out your weapons from your inventory. 

“You’ll be in my way. I have an army to help me.” Jinwoo gestured to his Shadows. 

“Relying on your soldiers to do your work?” You teased with a smirk. “Some Hunter you are. I can manage all on my own.”

In the end, admist your argument with Jinwoo on who would clear the dungeon, the two of you had already destroyed the surrounding forest, weaker monsters and boss while Jinwoo’s Shadows tried to calm the two of you down. The argument only ended when you accidentally slipped and fell through the reopened gate, while pulling Jinwoo with you of course. 

(It was Tusk that used his gravitational ability, Beru’s idea, and Igris’ agreement that made the two of you fall for each other. Literally.)

After your first raid with the Hunter, your System gave you stupid quests to meet with Jinwoo outside of work. Ridiculous missions like <Meet Your Partner!> or <Have A Meal> and Jinwoo got the same. The two of you worked out your little secret to growing strong. Turns out he was approached by Norma Selner as well, an offer to join their country’s ranks. Similarly, both of you declined. 

“You’re too slow.”

“You’re too stiff.”

“Your form is weird.”

“You’re not acting like a mage.”

“An assassin doesn’t use bow and arrow.”

“A mage doesn’t use daggers.”

“Want to get punched?”

“Want to get stabbed?”

It was decided that once in a while, S-Rank Hunters would gather at the training grounds to train together and even have mock battles. Whenever you and Jinwoo were in the same hall, the two of you would immediately get into a spat then a mock battle. Because the two of you had the System and quicker recovery, you two would let loose. No unique skills and back-up (Jinwoo’s Shadows), just pure physical talent. Which always result in childish bantering back and forth between blows. 

Your mock battles with Jinwoo always have to be timed else it could and would go on for hours. Cha Hae-In would rush to drag you away while Jinwoo had to be held off by Baek Yoonho and Ma Dongwook. Then the two of you would be sitting in the dialogically opposite spot glaring at each other, even resulting to making weird faces and hand gestures. The other Hunters could only sigh, unable to bear with the consequence if they stepped between you two.

Look at his silly face… Definitely not a better S-Rank Hunter than me. You looked away while drinking your water for a moment. But his speed is impressive… It’s been a while since I could let loose.

Being feisty again. Isn’t an assassin purposed to be quick with their target? Jinwoo would sneak glances at you while Hae-In requested to train with you and compete with a mock battle. Holding back? Guess mock battles with me is more fun. Ah, that form really brings out all the right qualities…

“They’re at it again.” Woo Jinchul sighed, calculating the damage cost that was done during the mock battle you had with Jinwoo. 

“Young love is wonderful isn’t it?” Chairman Go Gunhee chuckled, watching the two of you look at each other when the other’s attention was elsewhere. Of course, noticing the facial expression change and the faint blush on your faces. 

Jinchul groaned at the numbers, “We might as well have an entire island as their battle grounds.”

“That would give them the privacy needed.”

“Yes, that would help with the cost—” Jinchul did a double take to what the Chairman said, “Pardon sir?”

Gunhee only smiled and turned to his trusted aid, “If the two most powerful Hunters in our country were officially a couple, don’t you think they’d be a power couple?”

“...I suppose…”

Note: Yay! This is my first request for Solo Leveling! Hope it's done as you expected or wanted, Anon! Feels like everything's all over the place, but it's what it is. Enjoy!

Circe Y.

My Works: MASTERLIST

Taglist: (none)

[dilatorywriting]

Hi hi! So this is a request for the 4k followers thing and if it sounds like word vomit I apologize cuz I have no idea how to word this. Could I ask for prompt 10 ("I think we should go to dinner first.") with mc x azul? The scenario here is like that one twitter post that was going around awhile ago about how a falls first but b falls harder, with a being azul and how once he realizes his feelings he resigns himself to forever pining from afar bc he's convinced himself that any relationship between them would be doomed to failure since mc is from another world and would have to go home someday. But while mc is a bit dense when it comes to their own romantic feelings they've always been an upfront person and as soon as they realize they like him they kinda just,,,, barge into his office and say so, and I feel like the sentence prompt would be said by azul after a pretty intense make out session (maybe nothing spicy spicy but yeah) where at the end oh yeah he remembers he's a gentleman

Also after a bit of searching I found the twitter post I was talking about

Gender Neutral Reader x Azul Ashengrotto Word Count: 1.5k

Prompt 10: "I-I think we should go for dinner first."

[EVENT MASTERLIST]

Azul had been avoiding you.

Which was so strange and wholly out of character that the first few days of it went by in a weird sort of fugue. You hadn’t even noticed an entire week had passed in blissful, mafioso-free silence until you were heading to your Friday night shift at the Lounge and realized you hadn’t seen your favorite octopus even once. Normally the House Warden was fluttering around you like a scam artist to an old folks’ home. Poking, and prodding, and ‘ah, Prefect, I know you weren’t a fan of the last contract, but perhaps this one would suffice, hmm?’

And when you arrived in the little, employee-only locker room—still fully unbothered and not offered even a single opportunity to sell your soul—you wondered if maybe he’d gotten sick.

You were in the middle of taking some Savanaclaw student’s order when you finally saw him at all. Just a quick glance out of the corner of your eye to catch his shining, silver head of hair popping into his office. You smiled brightly and offered a wave. But Azul only went stiff and closed the door with a bang.

Which was…

Huh.

“Is Azul feeling okay?” you asked Jade between running an armload of drinks to a table of Pomefiore students.

The eel hummed and gave you one of those smiles that never really looked like it was meant to be a smile. “Our fearless leader is clinically sound.”

You frowned. Because that felt like one of the Vice Warden’s non-answers that he’d throw your way sometimes like a taller, meaner older sibling holding your favorite toy just out of reach.

“So he’s alright?” you pressed, hesitant.

“Oh, I never said that,” he chirped pleasantly, before ducking off to go catch the stack of plates that Floyd was in the process of juggling through the kitchen.

The bubbling panic popping in your gut was the worst sort of tummy ache. The kind that spread its miserable pain until it’d left your chest hurting, and head spinning, and something deeply wrong throbbing at the heart of you. Because Azul, despite his inherent tendencies to treat you like a particularly stupid pack mule, was still your best friend. The person you cared about most in all the world! Sure, he enjoyed bamboozling you and your fellow students, but, like he hadn’t done anything genuinely malicious in ages now! Like a paid hitman retiring into selling seedy vacation timeshares.

The idea of him just—just not wanting you anymore struck something horrible in you. Of finally realizing that the silly little human from worlds unknown wasn’t worth the wobbly pair of legs you were standing on. And it left you feeling small, and afraid, and—and—

“Oh? Are you feeling unwell, Prefect?” Jade called from somewhere behind you.

“Does Azul hate me?” you blurted out before you could help yourself.

The eel blinked his bi-colored eyes at you—slow and unbothered. Perhaps a bit surprised, if you had to put a name to the expression. Jade’s face was like that sometimes. An enigma. Like someone had wired him up just slightly wrong when putting it all together. On any other living creature, that sap-slow nonchalance would have certainly bordered on outright boredom, but you knew him well enough to know there was at least something else going on there.

“Why would he hate you?” he asked, equally dripping and slug slow.

“Because—!” you squawked, and waved your hands around your head. “Because!”

“I see,” he nodded. And then latched a gloved hand onto your shoulder and steered you back towards his boss’s office. He didn’t even bother to knock before wrenching the door open and shoving you inside.

Azul looked up with a start, eyes gone wide behind his glasses and jaw slack.

“What’s going—”

“The Prefect is on the verge of psychotic break,” Jade chirped helpfully, with a closed-eyed smile. “Please be delicate with them, hmm?”

And then slammed the door shut all over again. Leaving you alone with the guy who might have only very recently started to hate your guts. Or—or maybe he always had! And maybe you’d just been really, really dumb about picking it up! You wanted to scream. Or hide away forever. Azul looked like the latter was an exceptionally tempting idea, and you could see his blue eyes flicker around the room like he was looking for an escape route.

But the idea of him running away from you, that you’d never see him again—that he didn’t want to ever see you again—had something horribly enlightening clicking into place in your brain.

“Are you okay!” you asked, so loud it nearly rattled the furniture. And Azul flinched in surprise. “Did I do something wrong!”

“What?” he blinked, startled. “Of… Of course not.” He cleared his throat and stood carefully, making his way towards you in the manner one may approach a rabid racoon hiding under their porch. “Perhaps you should take a seat—”

“I can’t!” you cried, frantic. “Not if you’re upset!”

Another of those owlish, outright consternated bouts of blinking. “You can’t sit?”

“No!” you wailed. That prickling, hot, tight feeling nearly overflowing out of you. “Not if it’s my fault!”

His expression twisted up into something mulish and embarrassed, and he reached up to push his glasses back up the bridge of his nose with a soft huff.

“…it’s hardly your fault,” he said, sounding so stupidly sad that you just wanted to—to—

“How can I fix it?” you tried, panicked. Because he didn’t want to be around you anymore, and you couldn’t lose him. You couldn’t!

Azul sighed, gaze shifting away yet again. He offered you a tight, little smile that felt like all sorts of lies. “It’s alright, Prefect. Truly. It’s just something…” he trailed off, that forced smirk twitching off his lips like he couldn’t help it. “Something I’m learning to live with, hmm? Nothing terrible, I promise.”

“You shouldn’t have to live with something that’s bothering you,” you argued, firm. “You’re the king of fixing other people’s problems. You’re more than allowed to use all those connections and stuff to fix your own!”

“I’m afraid it doesn’t really work like that,” he tried, awkward, and you steamrolled on.

“Why not?! You’re amazing! And fantastic! And I love you so much, and you should never have to be upset about anything. And if you’re not in my life for the rest of my life, I’d rather die!” you wailed, and gasped—clapping your hands together like the idea that had just blossomed in your skull was just beyond brilliant. “We should get married!” And then, to sweeten the deal, “Think of the tax benefits!”

“I—” Azul choked, going as red as a tomato. “Y-You—”

“—love you very much!” you finished helpfully.

He ducked his face into his hands, like he could scrub the blush right off his cheeks if he tried hard enough.

“Y-You can’t—” he spluttered into his gloves. “You can’t just say things like that.”

“Why not?” you demanded. “It’s true!”

Azul’s shoulders hunched up like he was trying make himself very, very small. And then after a long moment of near hyperventilating into his palms, he finally looked back over at you from behind the shield of his fingers.

“You…” he swallowed. “You love me?”

You nodded, certain. Becauese what else could that warm, bright, all-consuming thing be in your chest be but that?

“You,” he said again. “Love me?”

“Yes,” you agreed, never more sure of anything than that. “And we should get married.”

Azul choked again and went back to hiding behind his fingers.

“Unless…” you started, trailing off as something horrible and unsure squirmed through your chest. “Unless you don’t want to, of course. It should be your choice too. Just because I love you, doesn’t mean you have to love me, y’know?”

“That’s not what I said!” he squawked, head snapping back up so fast he nearly knocked the glasses off his face. And then he went red all over again, all the way to the tips of his ears, and he was reaching up to pull the rim of his hat down over his eyes with a curse. “I just…” he began, muffled behind the fabric of his overcoat. “Maybe… dinner first?” he choked. “Before the proposal.”

“Oh,” you blinked, startled. “Of course. That makes sense.”

“That makes sense,” Azul echoed, sounding like you’d come up from behind him and walloped him with a baseball bat rather than just suggested a completely rational and beneficial mutual engagement. “I… I don’t know why I’m surprised at all.”

You quirked a brow. “Were you… expecting me to say that?” you asked confused.

This time he did look back up at you fully. Hands lowered, and the shield of his collar gone and all. The smile he sent you was small but so, heartachingly warm that it had butterflies dancing in your stomach.

“No,” he hummed, sounding impossibly pleased. “I really, really wasn’t.”

.

.

[mayzi33]

I like to think all the main four (Sonic, Tails, Knuckles and Amy) are protective over eachother in a way.

They're all protective over Tails of course, the youngest, their little brother. They won't stop him from throwing an explosive at you if you're an asshole but if you do or say something that gets his ears to fold down the slightlest you have exactly 5 seconds to run.

Amy can easily squash her hammer at any creepy guy that comes to her, but why waste her breath when her 3 boys will gladly hunt him down? They all give Amy princess treatment aside from the usual friendly taunting and I will die on this hill.

We all know Sonic has a tendency to run into situations without thinking. Tails, Knuckles and Amy sometimes have to straight up go on babysitter mode in the middle of the battle to make sure their spiky blue friend doesn't run straight into a pit full of spikes or something. Also, add the fact that Sonic has been stated to be "too trusting" sometimes and how his belief that everyone has a little good in them and deserves a second chance can bite him in the butt. Sure, Sonic might have granted you his trust, but that doesn't mean his three less-trusting-more-logical teamates won't look you dead in the eye and warn you and I quote: "break his trust and we'll break your back."

Now as for Knuckles, we know he's the oldest, strongest and most serious of the group, but we all know years of isolation led him to have the naivety of a child. Some folks might think that seeing the red echidna around is the perfect opportunity to use their scamming tricks, but oh, if only there wasn't a speedy hedgehog, an 8yo carrying guns and a girl with a giant hammer hanging around him constantly like some sort of bodyguards. The M.E's guardian going to the surface is a rare occurance, so if you dare to even THINK about ruining this with your con artist stuff, you WILL end up with a broken bone.

[mochiwrites]

I would also like to see you put scarian in situations:

51. Meet ugly/awkward first meetings please?

51. Meet ugly/awkward first meetings (put that guy in situations!)

reblogs do more than likes!

“You tricked me!” Grian’s voice lifts in pitch as he yells. He’s spent all day hunting for that scarred merchant who sold him that ‘wooden cutting board.’ Grian’s not the sort to get so easily scammed, but the merchant had been… very nice looking. He managed to find him after practically running through the Hypixel hub all day.

For his part, the man looks startled by Grian’s arrival, green eyes nervously flicking around their surroundings. No one bats an eye at them. He looks at Grian, “Ah! You’re the red sweater guy from a few days ago! How’s that cutting board treating you?” He smiles, all smooth and polite.

It makes Grian growl with frustration. “You said it was wooden, but the second I went to use it, the whole thing crumbled to dust!” The scarred man blinks at him, feigning some kind of concern. It makes Grian want to grab him by the shoulders and shake him around. “You scammed me out of my diamonds.”

“Why I’d never scam! Everything I have to sell,” he gestures to the large pouch at his feet, “is completely authentic! If you want another cutting board I could—”

“I want my diamonds back,” Grian interrupts him, not even giving him another chance to smooth talk his way into Grian’s wallet. Not again. He’s not letting this handsome guy have his way with him again!

The merchant winces in return, quickly covering it up with a smile, “I’m afraid it was non-refundable! I’d be happy to give you another product in exchange?” He tilts his head before his eyes light up. “How about a couple of rare magic crystals? Or an enchanted book? I have a one of a kind fishing rod with so much luck, a fisherman once found Atlantis because of it!”

Grian’s eyebrow twitches in annoyance, “How in Void’s name did I let you talk your way into making me buy anything from you, dude. It’s so obvious you’re a scam.”

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re so blunt it hurts?” the scarred man quips, the smile never leaving his face. “Does that scare off the ladies?”

Grian snorts, “It’s sent plenty of men running.”

He pretends not to notice how the man’s eyes light up. “You sure have a sharp wit about you. I like that.” The smile on his face softens into something a bit more real, and Grian sees the way it reaches his eyes. It makes his heart skip a beat.

“You’re not smooth talking your way out of repaying me.” He crosses his arms, squinting at the man. “I’m expecting to be repaid — I gave you ten diamonds for a piece of junk!”

The man laughs, and oh if isn’t the nicest sound Grian has ever heard. “May I interest you in a different deal instead, my good sir?” he inquires, taking a step closer.

“Depends on if it involves getting my diamonds back or not.” Grian lifts a brow.

“While I can’t make your diamonds magically reappear, I can make it up to you. If you’ll allow me too.” That stupidly soft smile is still on his face.

Grian’s nose scrunches up and he scoffs. “Thanks but no thanks. I have rent to pay so if you can’t pay me back, I have to go find a different way.” He knew it was a bad idea to begin with! What the heck did he need a cutting board for anyway?! He doesn’t even cook for crying out loud! The man really had just… charmed him with words alone. Well, his looks certainly had something to do with it. It’s not Grian’s fault he’s weak for a guy with fluffy brown hair and nice green eyes!

He frowns and steps back, turning around. He starts walking away with hurried steps.

“W-Wait!” the man cries out, hurrying after him. Grian’s pace doesn’t slow, determined. They fall into step together, walking side by side. “Just hear me out!”

“No thanks!” Grian starts walking faster, hoping to shake him.

Unfortunately, he doesn’t.

“I promise it’ll be worth your time! Your while even! I’ll knock your socks off!”

“Not interested!”

“Please! Let me take you out to dinner!”

Grian stops short, eyes going wide. His cheeks go red, and he whirls on the merchant to look at him. “What?!”

“Let me take you out to dinner!” he repeats, and Grian continues to stare at him, jaw dropping. “While I can’t give you back your diamonds, I can at least treat you to some Goodtimes.” He winks, and oh Void is he flirting right now?!

“I— you— what—” Grian stammers out, heart thundering in his chest. The man’s smile is doing terrible things to his critical thinking skills.

“You won’t have to pay for a thing! I can talk our way into the best restaurant of your choosing,” he continues on.

Now that… is a curious thing. And Grian feels like he’s about to make another bad decision.

“…if it’s a date, you should at least tell me your name.”

“It’s Scar! Scar Goodtimes,” Scar replies, green eyes bright and pleased. There’s a little smirk on his face. “And you are?”

“Grian.” Is he really doing this? “So… where and when am I meeting you, Scar?” He’s really doing this.

“Let’s say… tomorrow afternoon? Meet me here?” Scar questions, and Grian takes in a breath.

“I expect my socks to be blown off,” he teases.

(It turns out to be the best decision he’s ever made. Even if the first choice was a bad financial investment.)

[pepper-makes-art]

relavity falls stans, graunts, n friends

oK THEYRE HERE NOW AND NOT JUST FIDDLEFORD!!!

fiddleford can be found here!!!

i wish i could've done more sketches but im a bit busy atm </3 will def do some on the weekends though!!

on the au:

instead of taking place in 2014, it takes place in 2024 now! which doesnt rlly change much outside of appearances and slang lol.

bold is what their au name is

stanford (ford) <--> dipper

pretty self explanatory! i feel like stanford'd be an x-men fan, hence the x patch on his shoulder lol. also yes, dipper is a trans woman here. and she has glasses bc fuck dude i hate drawing regular eyes.. i thought the design looked a bit empty, so i decided to make that cool glove thing ford had dipper's robot hand thingy!

stanley (lee) <--> mabel (mason)

stanley now wears a hat. hoorah. nothing much to say here besides him also smuggling shanklin in (w/o the knife unfortunately). mabel's still impersonating her sibling (who, before the portal scene, doesn't know that she's a girl now) under the name of mason, but has ultimately shed her sibling's fashion tastes for her own. mabel wears a turtleneck UNDER the suit bc she doesnt feel heat apparently!

candy <--> wendy

candy's now a 15 yo asian kid who took up the cashier job under grauntie bc she needed more extracurriculars and the experience. totally cant relate to that haha. wendy's now a 12 yo mischievous lil lumberjack who's best friends w/ stanley (i thought it'd be interesting since theyre all now still associated w each other) and who has ALL the middle school tea (which is A LOT)

grenda <--> soos

as much as i want the ages to line up relatively (haha get it.), i think it'd be funny if mabel just hired a bunch of teenagers to run the shack (not sure what to call it). grenda's the 15 yo handy(wo)man who has the voice of an angel and the golden mentality of "smash with couch"! soos is now a friendly n equally naive 12 yo who's best friends w stanely (yada yada) and who somehow always solves problems

on dipper and mabel (will be using he/him for pre-transition dipp):

hoo boy. i see SO many ppl arguing abt their relationship, and i just gotta say, i can tell who has siblings and who doesn't! (joke. thats a joke. mostly) anyways, theyre good siblings!! up until high school, where after drifting apart somewhat, they have a big argument abt where theyre going in life - dipper wants to go to insert rlly good college name and become a scientist while mabel, well, she doesn't know where she wants to go. unbeknownst to them, while theyre fighting, their parents are also fighting. suddenly, their parents split, and mabel is forced to live with her mom and dipper with his dad, far apart from each other. dipper (wearily) accepts this while mabel silently resents dipper for his submission

dipper attends his dream school but is unhappy in his schooling years. afterwards, with his 12 phds or whatever the hell, he goes to a quaint town named relativity falls... mabel becomes an artist of sorts, taking commissions n such, but finds that this doesn't exactly lead to profit. she then becomes a sort of con(wo)man and psychic in attempts to capitalize the strange. she DEF doesn't get into as much srs trouble as stanley did back in his day, but she still lands herself in hot water from scamming and stealing across state lines...

im tired rn so lmk if yall wanna hear more lol.

[kuijoon]

Dumping Sampo hcs because he makes me sick

Genderfluid. Feel like this one’s a no brainer for Sampo fans but still. No one can take this one away from me

Aroace. I may enjoy lots of Sampo ships but in cannon he’s aroace to me idc what anyone says

His pupils turn into slits when he’s pissed off (snake symbolism yk)

Sharp canines because I saw way too much Sampo fanart with this and now I can’t unsee the sharp teeth

Shapeshifter like Sparkle

Has another persona that is part of the dark-blue victim alliance (his hate club). He makes money from selling the anti-scam guide depicting various of his (outdated) scams.

Has a thing for mechanical stuff. He builds his own bombs, fixed the TV in Rivet Town by himself (which I actually think is cannon) and sometimes tried to fix random junk he finds

Motorbike somewhat similar to the one on his phone case. Does NOT pass safety regulations

Has a run-down house somewhere in the snow plains where no one can find him. Stuffed with maps, supplies like food or medicine and mechanical parts

Made maps detailing silvermane patrol routes, tunnels, etc- also notes where he writes down stuff he found out about the planet that may be useful in the future

Above average body temperature, has some weird outworlder stuff like the trailblazers going on where he doesn’t get cold so easily

Doesn’t like sweets. He really wants to, still eats candy every now and then , but everytime it just tastes disgusting

His voice isn’t naturally that high, he just spend years trying to change it

He used to rob banks on other planets but resorted to scamming in Belobog because the security systems are just so shitty and outdated it takes away all the fun

Some sort of parental figure for Hook. He’s one of the few people allowed to refer to her as just “Hook”, but decides to call her by her full title anyway

[beansricejc]

Headcanon: Keanu Reeves's characters as University Students.

what an amazing prompt omfg! CW: cursing, implied homophobia, vulgar descriptions of drug use

JOHN CONSTANTINE - Religious Studies / Parapsychology. His parents would roll their eyes and friends would laugh at such a degree to work towards. “You’re kidding.” John’s dad would grumble, scoffing as his swigs a beer. “You might as well just become a priest and swear off chasin’ tail. What the fuck even is… parapsycholo-“

“I’d be studying psychic or paranormal phenomena, for your information.” John would groan, snatching his dad’s cigarette box from the porch table and lighting one up. His father, an even more cynical asshole (if you can believe it) than him, laughed in disbelief.

“You’re seriously wasting your prime years on bein’ a ghostbuster?” His dad snickered, then calling John an unsavory, homophobic slur, as per usual. These talks he has with his father always end up with one of them getting a bloody nose and their ass kicked. This time, it’s his drunk of a father.

Who knew that would end up helping him in the long run, with casting demons out of little girls and helping twins in the afterlife?

KEVIN LOMAX - Law/Finance. Of course this big shot lawyer is going to have a law degree, duh. But I also envision something else. I can picture Kevin pulling a Jordan Belfort, scamming rich fools into investing into shitty companies. Money laundering, tax evasion, snorting cocaine out of a hired woman’s ass, all at the top of a sky scraper in the financial district in the Big Apple. He definitely skipped class to sleep in or recover from a previous night’s partying. It didn’t matter though, Kevin is stupidly smart and hardly needs to study to pass any sort of exam.

NEO - Computer Programming. Do I even have to explain this one? Late nights, redbull, he’s gotta pass somehow, and these classes are making Neo work for it.

JACK TRAVEN/JOHNNY UTAH - Criminal Justice. These boys in blue were at the top of their class at their respective programs, Utah for the FBI, and Traven for the LAPD police academy. It always helps to have a bit of book smarts to go along with their pretty faces.

JOHN WICK - Our favorite Russian assassin didn’t go to college, we already know this. However, if he did, I can see our man going in for a History or English degree. Years pass and he graduates, getting a job at some middle school out of state to get far away from his past life as he can. Mr. Wick is a fantastic teacher, the boys think he’s cool as hell and the girls think he’s scary but unfortunately he knows what he’s doing. Mr. Wick has already promised himself never to mix personal life with his job, just like he did in the past when he did hits for a living. That is until parent-teacher conferences happen at the end of the semester. When one of his favorite kiddos brings in their single mom, and he can barely hold it together in front of her.

Embarrassing.

[random-imagines-blog]

Imagine being cute, innocent and a bit ditzy, and dating the Lost Boys.

Multiple imagines under the cut.

David

Sometimes, he really doesn’t know why he likes you. Out of all of the boys, he’s the one that’s least likely to put up with any stupid questions. And you’re full of a lot of those questions. It’s not your fault, you don’t have much experience in the world. Your helicopter parents made sure of that, but sometimes - it was like you never watched a movie that was on past nine o’clock at night, or picked up a book that didn’t have illustrations inside of it.

So he took on the community service job of teaching you about the world. And how to survive if he ever decides to let you go. He hasn’t made up his mind yet. Sometimes, you can be real entertaining though.

“I’m really good at surviving,” You insisted, in that earnest puppy-dog way that you often did. He was going to show you how to scam the vendors for food, how to get it for free because unlike what you thought - food didn’t just appear in the fridge magically. You had to actually go to get it. Food equals survival, that was lesson number one. “I’m literally alive right now.”

There were chuckles from the rest of the guys, but they stopped when David glared at them. His lungs needed no air but he took a deep breath regardless, just to keep himself from putting his hand around your neck and giving it a required squeeze.

“Because you’ve always had someone take care of you,” David said, slowly. “We’re not your daddies, little girl. If you want to be one of us, there’s some things you have to do all by yourself.”

You pouted, lip-glossed lips plump against your skin. Oh, that look usually made him give in, if only to get it off of your face because it was an annoyance. “Are you sure you can’t take care of me, David? I can learn to cook and clean and you only have to do the rest.”

The thought of you near an oven - for some reason, he could only picture you making sweet things like cakes and brownies. Sweet like you. Nothing that would give them any sort of sustenance.

“That does mean killing the spider nests,” He said, knowing that would make you freeze and stop fighting back. Oh, you did pause at that, falling quiet in a way that you rarely ever did. Killing something, even spiders, was something you had trouble doing. You knew what he and the boys were but actually doing it yourself was too difficult.

“Okay, I’ll learn,” You said, pulling out a small notebook and pen from your bag in order to take notes.

Dwayne

You were talking his ear off tonight. It wasn’t his favorite thing in the world - he was known as the strong and silent type for a reason, but he understood that this introduction to his lifestyle came with a lot of those questions. Why had he let you, the girl that he had known for a couple of weeks from the boardwalk, into the secret of him and his boys being vampires? He wasn’t quite sure. There was something about you though. Something that he liked.

“So you sleep upside down like bats, but you can also crawl on walls like spiders?” You questioned.

He was wondering where the spiders were coming into this. He hadn’t heard that comparison but he nodded. It wasn’t a crawl, more of a jump and a hold, but he felt like you might not understand that either.

Somehow, you had gotten through your whole life without hearing about vampires. Not many people believed in the real thing, but they were everywhere in media. Books, movies, comics. But you were ignorant of it all. Innocent of everything that was scary in this world. Of everything different. When he had told you that he was a vampire, you had asked which country that was, if it was like being Canadian, or if it was some new sort of zodiac sign that they were coming up with these days.

“So.... are you like a spider in other ways?” You asked, sitting upon his lap, running your fingers through his long and pretty hair. “Are you more scared of humans than we are of you?”

“Definitely not,” Dwayne said, quickly. Scared? Never. Not Dwayne. He might not be as foolish as say, Paul and Marco, but that didn’t mean that he was scared. “Humans are terrified of us. As they should be.”

“So I should be scared of you?”

“No,” He said, shaking his head. He took your hands out of your hair and held them, fingers intertwined. “You’ll never have to be scared of me. I’m not going to let anyone hurt you.”

Paul

For the second time that night, Paul felt one of your arms unwrap from his waist to point at something that you saw. Santa Carla was apparently full of wonders tonight, and you couldn’t stop pointing them out to him. “Look, I can see the roller coaster from here!” You said, your finger directed right at the lights of the top of the coaster.

“Hey,” Paul said, turning his head over his shoulder. “What did I tell you about pointing at things?”

“Oopsie,” You laughed. “I forgot about the seatbelt rule.”

The seatbelt rule, as he called it, was that you had to have your arms around him at all times. You were far too used to the inside of a car where you weren’t at the risk of just falling out. That wasn’t true on a motorbike. You were to keep yourself grounded on him, acting as his sort of seatbelt so that his weight could be yours. Paul didn’t relax or go back to his easy going grin until your arms were back around him, and your head was settled onto the back of his leather jacket.

You were the only one to garner any sort of worry  out of him like this. Even Laddie knew better, even he didn’t get himself into these kinds of situations. Sometimes it felt like the boy didn’t even have as much innocence as you did. But neither was he as cute, which was one of the big reasons why Paul kept you around. The idea of you falling off and hurting yourself made that carefree smile slide right off of his face.

“Thatta girl,” He said. “Hold on tight, we’re going for a ride.”

And with that, he cranked up the power, and brought on the speed, swerving through the bikes of the other boys, hair flying behind him and around you, focused only on the warmth of you body against his.

Marko

Marko enjoyed spoiling you. Or rather, he liked the idea of making you feel spoiled. He’d take you to all the fancy clothing stores that were in Santa Carla, the ones that were open after sundown, and he’d watch as you tried on all manner of outfits. Marko’s gonna take care of you baby, he’d claim, leaning back all cool, adjusting the collar on his infamous jacket.

But these ‘shopping’ sessions would always end up with him asking you to wait by the bike, while he set something on fire and would run out with all of the things that you liked, not paying for a thing. And you had not the slightest clue or suspicion. You were too innocent to even imagine that he would steal hundreds of dollars of clothing just for you.

You came out of that dressing room now, wearing a fluffy fur jacket. It wasn’t that which caught him so off guard. It was the fact that you had managed to find something that was so - pink. SO pink.

“Oh my god,” You said, thinking his reaction was totally about something else. “It’s fake fur, I promise. I’d never wear real!”

Marko’s eyes went from wide to squinted as he started to crack up. Of course it was fake. No animal save for flamingos were that pink and last he checked, they didn’t have any goddamn fur. He really started to laugh, getting to his feet and approaching you.

“Baby,” He drawled, chewing on a toothpick. “I drink blood every night. I’m not worried about you wearing any real fur.”

Your nose scrunched cutely as you remembered that. It wasn’t something you liked being brought up. The blood. The stains in his clothing that you had to get out. He was the one who needed these shopping trips more than you did.

“And that’s why I’m staying vegetarian. Cleaner clothes,” You said, making question marks appear above his head. He opened his mouth to ask what the heck you were thinking about but then shrugged it off. Sometimes it was better not to know.

“Alright, alright, you should get it. Though I don’t know why you’re gonna need the only fur coat in all of Santa Carla.”

“Faux fur,” You corrected, stepping back inside of the dressing room.

[batsvnte]

𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐘𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄 — Everything has to be in order to make this trip worth it. In one hand you had a bag full of supplies. Water and food with bits of medical equipment in case you get in trouble that was running low. A journal with some sort of entertainment to write about your travels. It’s always been like this for an while and you were fine with just that.

But, there had been unexpected hiccups in your wandering adventure so you opted to have another item on you. A wagon that you had gotten (scammed) from a man who was a local of another planet. He didn’t really look like a local, just some random visitor. You didn’t really have any other option than to choose some wagon that could possibly hold anything and everything you needed.

By that, anything could mean an grown man that was knocked out who was incidentally bleeding out slowly on your wagon. When you had stumbled upon him, his wounds were deep and he was bleeding vaguely fast. You couldn’t leave him on the ground with abominations running rampent around the place and you didn’t know if you had enough time to get help before he died from the wounds inflicted. So you did the best thing you could think of.

You had done the best you could to tend to his wounds without using up all of your supplies. Getting your hands covered in blood wasn’t on your list for the day, but it didn’t really matter at the moment. You just hoped that they would focus more on the injured man on your wagon than the fact that it looks like you had murdered him. You were too young to go to jail.

Getting a good look at his appearance, you couldn’t place where exactly you had seen him before. He was on his side where the wound wasn’t located on. Though his blueish, raven hair covered parts of his face. You couldn’t focus on that now. You just had to get him some help at the moment.

It was a torturous one hour of having to wait out monsters strolling by, wheeling the wagon to one place to another without the worry of him falling out and going up the little hills that could possibly mean danger on the other end. It was horrible taking those shortcuts that you were extra weary.

But thankfully, the wagon had held up long enough to come across an small little store. You nearly felt like collapsing in the process of relief that you found the store in time, but at the same time it was one that had an automatic system mandating it. An AI that you had no trouble with. But it was a buggy one with major and minor difficulties with one being that you couldn’t call for help.

You did have a plan in mind to get through this. Which took nearly forever with washing the blood and getting bandages, medicine, and other things needed.

“Will that be all?”

“Yeah…..”

It was wrong to leave the guy out in the back of the store with semi-untreated wounds. Fast tapping against the glass counter as the robot had process everything that you had purchased. Nearly 50 credits but it would be worth it. You cautiously glanced out the door for anyone else coming in and also at the robot that took forever to get everything.

“Have an go—“

No time to let the clerk finish its sentence. You felt bad but it wouldn’t possibly matter right now. Rummaging through the bag as you sped walk back over to where you last left the wagon, but as you rounded the corner there was… nothing. Nobody. The man was gone.

The only thing that was evidence of his existence was the bloodied bottom of the wagon. And a neatly folded paper at the corner of the wagon that was free of blood. You plucked it up from its spot, unfolding it with careful care.

“Thanks for taking care of Bladie <3”

Confusing and a bit weird. No other word that could tell who it was from. A friend of ‘Bladie’s’ you had assumed. You shoved note back into one of the pockets of your jacket and took an small blanket to cover up the top of it. The smell would draw attention but for now would do it. Just as long as you didn’t run into anyone.

It wasn’t till much later you gotten into another spot where you could rest your legs. Hopefully taking the time to clean the blood from the wagon. You couldn’t stop thinking about the man and the note left behind. The name was familiar, and the man as well.

Looking up you found a poster plastered on the rocky wall in front of you. The picture of the man that you had found with an bounty and information about him. Your stomach dropped as you took in the information.

“Damn… I helped a wanted criminal”

The possible thought of getting into trouble loomed over you. Though it would be a funny little story to mention to your friends. You were too distracted by that to noticed that there was an purple sticker stuck on the side of your wagon.

[dreamerinthemoonlight]

Honkai Star Rail Period HCs (Sampo, Dan Heng, Jing Yuan, Luka)

Original Ask: Could you do more period hcs? Dang Heng/Yinyue, Jing Yuan, Sampo, and Luka please.

Herr you go @yunthebishoujo

CW: blood, mentions of castration (Sampo), mentions of period sex

Sampo x afab! reader, Dan Heng x afab!reader, Jing Yuan x afab!reader, Luka x afab!reader

NOTE: Requests are now open

Sampo Koski

Tall, blue, and handsome? After dealing with you on your period or during PMS, he might be tall, blue, and singing soprano for the rest of his life

Good gods, Sampo would be insufferable. Not that he isn't anyway

It's not that I think he would be actively mean, but he's annoying and hormones make girls grouchy

That and I wouldn't put it past him to use your period as an excuse to run a scam

Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if he's used the female populace's monthly affliction as a scam premise prior to dating you

He's just really likely too be just too annoying and end up with no dick as a result

On the other hand, he's a kinky bastard. He'd be up for period sex

Dan Heng

Dan Heng is #1 most clueless guy when it comes to periods

He's not a bad guy, but really, chicks don't advertise the call of mother nature, so he hasn't really dealt with Himeko and March on an intimate level

I'm not sure that's something he came across in his research and the Vidyadhara can't reproduce, so there's every chance female Vidyadhara don't have periods, so he may not even know periods exist

Needless to say, his first experience with your period is a bit of a surprise.

I feel like it would probably be something like waking up with blood on your sheets or having super bad cramps, or blood on the pants, ya know, shit that happens when you bleed for a week out of every month (total BS if you ask me)

Any way you cut it, Dan Heng is seriously concerned. To the point of potentially losing a little bit of his composure. He wouldn't panic but you're bleeding. is something wrong? Do you need to go to the doctor? Why didn't you tell someone?

"Yo, Dan Heng, calm down. This is normal. I do this every month."

Cue Dan Heng.exe has stopped working

To his credit, he stops, listens, and calms down. He's still unnerved, but he helps try to make you comfortable

But afterwards he goes to ask Welt and Himeko about it

In the future, he's pretty good about being aware of it and trying to be as good as possible about it, but I don't think he truly gets used to that much blood every single month

Jing Yuan

You know what? Jing Yuan is not that bad.

He has the advantage of age and being part of a species that reproduces

I'm not sure he's super familiar with the whole period thing, but it's at least on his radar to some extent

But when he starts dating you, he's like the most gentle person. He's the sort who really likes to take care of you and make sure you have what you need

He won't mother hen, but expect pads/tampons, heating pads, whatever your craving is, and plenty of cuddles and you don't even really have to ask

I mean, this guy is known for his ability to be prepared. 100% applies that to you

And if he's at all weirded out by the whole bleeds for a week straight and is fine (which, i do understand, in any other situation someone would have bed out already), he's not overt about it and doesn't let it affect how he treats you

Luka

Luka, Luka, Luka

Of the four, he's probably the most likely to be a typical guy about it

You're bleeding? And still functional? You do this every month? What sorcery is this?

At the same time, he has mad respect for you because he knows he couldn't do it

He also gives appropriate sympathy for cramps

At the same time, 100% best boyfriend. Ask and you shall receive

Totally down for period cuddles, stomach rubs and just general comfort

10/10 Luka is great

[lurkingshan]

Goodbye Cooking Crush

Aw man, I am so sad this wonderful little show is over. It delivered everything I needed and held up all the way through its run. Everything came together in this finale for some great final payoffs, and the characters stayed true. When we were watching the finale I said to @neuroticbookworm and @twig-tea that this show is writing porn, because all of the narrative threads build and converge in such a satisfying way. I posted a couple weeks ago that this show is exactly what you want from a good romcom, and I stand by it. Great outing for OffGun and a very rewarding show that I will surely be rewatching many times.

As expected, this week delivered a solid, nuanced ending for Ten's family conflict. I loved the way Ten sat Prem down at the family table, took the chair opposite his father at the other end of the table in a clear power move, and told him in no uncertain terms that Prem was his boyfriend and he had to accept it. And his dad did not have a sudden personality transplant; he pushed back and challenged Prem to prove his integrity. It made sense to me that Prem wanted to pay that money back; the money scam from the beginning of their relationship has been weighing on him the whole time, and he doesn't want any shred of doubt lingering over his relationship with his in-laws. My favorite part of that whole sequence was Prem's grandma finally finding out about the money and getting out her switch; this was never Prem's burden to bear alone and I'm glad he learned his lesson about not asking for help.

So Ten's dad was forced to accept Prem when he came through on his promise, and he even offered a classic Asian parent version of an apology by coming to Prem's restaurant to acknowledge him, which is more than I expected from him. My favorite thing about that final scene at the restaurant is that Ten's dad hasn't really changed and he and Ten are not suddenly getting along; their conversation was still adversarial even as he finally explained a couple things, and in the end he was left to eat at the table alone. No unearned parental 180 here. They are not suddenly a big happy family, but they've settled on a detente everyone can live with. It feels right.

And in another family drama, Fire finally found the courage to tell his mother how much she has hurt him, and after an initial rejection, she realized she didn't want to lose Fire and offered him acceptance. I would have liked a bit more breathing room in this plot because her turn felt a little too easy, but it's a side story so I get that they were time constrained. It was nice to see Fire finally stand up for her, and Dynamite begrudgingly accepted into the family. I liked that Dy's family didn't magically appear; not all families will accept their queer children, and that is the reality he has to live with. But it must have felt somewhat healing to see that happen for Fire and know he was a big part of giving Fire the courage to finally come out.

Meanwhile, the Three Must-Eat-Ers lost the cooking competition but won the hearts of many with the touching story of their final dish, and built careers bolstered by their show fandom. I was so pleased to get the flash forward to show us that Prem did get to open his chef's table restaurant, with Ten's full support (and with rings of some sort on, not sure if they're engaged or married but they are definitely committed). It was the very sweet cherry on top of the ice cream sundae of their romance. Ten and Prem, Communication Kings, are going down as one of my all-time favorite bl couples.

I am agnostic on the final Samsee/Pang reveal, given my hopes for a Samsee/Metha pairing. I'm not mad at the show for not going there--it would definitely have been pairing the spares to put Samsee and Metha together, which I generally do not go in for--and am mostly happy that Samsee found love and Metha is still part of the gang. I would have also loved to see those bullies get some comeuppance, but honestly, bullies often win, and it didn't feel like a true loss for our boys so I'm good with it. This was a solid finale for a feel good show and I will miss it dearly.

[ofallthingsnasty]

Darling who doesn’t speak their yandere’s language…oh the possibilities

Yandere can say anything and their darling wouldn’t understand. They’d probably tell darling the most depraved and lewd things and darling would be like “Hm? What does that mean?” and yandere would tell them “It means ‘Have a good day’!” ☺️

Or if a darling escapes and tries to go to the authorities for help. They won’t understand what darling is saying and yandere will swoop in and tell them “oh this is my friend visiting from another country. They must have gotten lost, poor thing, thank you for keeping them safe for me!”

The possibilities, indeed…

tags: yandere, minors dni, starts out with general yandere tropes, then shifts to One Piece and then to one of my OCs (Evan), just silly ramblings, really wc: 0.8k

From the malicious ones who pick a foreign darling on purpose - one, because it makes it harder for you to leave and two, because you’ll be more difficult to find by your own country’s police force, just because of the sheer amount of bureaucracy. You’re just so dependent on them. If they drag you out into the country (and out of the city, where you will find way more speakers of your language), change up your appearance and introduce you as their spouse - they could keep you for years, probably. Even have you around in the public, if they’re cocky. And if they just stuff you in the basement… No one will ever find you. So, even if you aren’t their little secret - you still need them for everything. From doctor’s appointments to simple shopping trips, to conversations with the neighbors… They’ll keep you dumb and complacent, translate what others say to you and you to them however it fits their own interests. And if you are just the little basement spouse, well… Have fun trying to break out of your confines and then running to the next house where you’ll be regarded as nothing but some crazy person hurriedly gesturing and trying to scream at anyone you can lay an eye on. They can’t understand you - and there are all sorts of scams out there today, who knows what your real motive is? No, no, that door is closing even before you can finish your first sentence. What a bleak fate. Then there are the egoistic ones - the ones who can communicate with you, but you can’t do the same with your environment. They want to be the center of your universe, their everything, the only way you experience life - not out of malice, but out of sheer obsession. I don’t think such a type would pick a foreign darling on purpose, but it’s a massive plus for them. It’s going to be just you and them, in your own little world, where they might as well be your god with how much power they hold over you. I could also see a spouse-turned-captor type go this route - just in reverse. They’d probably get you to move somewhere you’re a fish out of water and they very much aren’t - just to make it almost impossible for you to leave them. Because not only do they manage everything for you now, no, there is a financial aspect to this… Do you even have the money to move back? Or are you stuck in a foreign place, strapped for cash and without any helping hands? Goodness, you better think twice about breaking up with them, hm?

Also, I have to bring my fandom du jour into this - but this makes me think of Sanji, at least in a roundabout way. If we’re talking about a modern AU, I think he would immensely enjoy a foreign darling. In general, I see him not as a classic yandere, but more as someone who slowly morphs into one because he loves you so deeply, is so dependent on you. And you know what he’d adore? If you had to communicate with the rest of the world through him. He’d do anything for you - and I really mean anything. That man hangs on every word that falls from your lips, knows how to interpret every little twitch of your eyebrow, would crawl into your skin if he could - the thought of you having to lean on him in such a way, to give back even a fraction of that love and need he has for you… He’s obsessed with it. Not only can he truly and fully keep you to himself if you two were to move out of the country, you’d need him for everything. On the surface, he’s such a sweet, adoring husband but deep, deep down he’s a total creep. You’ll probably never see it coming, just take that little idea of his to move as something that would benefit you, first and foremost - because to you, Sanji never thinks about his own well-being, only yours. Aren’t you so lucky? And you know who would love a foreigner darling as well? One of my werewolf boys, Evan. Not necessarily because it makes things easier (it’s certainly a plus, just not intentional), but because he gets incredibly sentimental over the fact that he can teach you English. He views himself as your knight in shining armor, your husband, the love of your life - and god, wouldn’t it be so cute, such an amazing bonding experience to teach you his language? Once he sees you, he’s already dreaming of long nights spent pouring over books, of you clumsily parroting whatever he tells you to say. You’re going to be so grateful for all his work, too, he just knows it! Honestly, the moment the idea pops into his head, he’s immediately making a wishlist for all sorts of books and learning material one could feed an English second language learner.

[creatingblackcharacters]

I CANT BELIVE I FORGOT TO SEND THIS ASK. ADHD is killing me. Anyways,

holy shit, Sam and Jammer from Misfits & Magic (watch it on dropout)

first of all. I HAVE to give props to the fucking incredible DM, Aabria Lyengar,

Who is not only amazing, but also one of the best dm’s I’ve ever heard. One of my favorite clips from episode one is when she completely SHOCKS Brennan Lee mulligan (one of the DMs of all time) with her sick as fuck decision to describe what his character Does Not See, something Brennan never did. OK. NEXT

This is Jammer. He’s a sports man himbo who loves his friends dearly and has a pet loving basketball because it’s sick. He’s really friendly and will always bring people into their group and hype them up to make sure he and his friends feel GOOD about themselves.

Some of his cutest scenes are with Evan Kelmp, where they give eachother compliments and . God I don’t want to spoil it but I’m also grinning while typing this.

This is his actor . Who is a national treasure. Lou Wilson!!!

And Last but DEFINITELY NOT LEAST . Sam.

She’s a twitch streamer who mainly does mukbangs. She’s a real powerhouse who loves talking to people!! She also can see the lines of affection(?) between people and her pet patrons thing is a stream pig (a cute little pink piglet) named after her favorite movie, Terminator 2!!!!! Her mom was part of a MLM scam so she mostly wears that sort of thing. She also loves her friends so, so so much . She’s full of love and the urge to create content. I love her.

and this is her wonderful actor, Danielle Radford!

Anyways go watch misfits & magic on dropout it’s the best I think. Ever

Black women running D&D 🥹🥹🥹 oh I'm so happy. I've heard of Aabria being iconic, and I fully support (plus that art behind her?? 🤌🏾🔥🔥) Lou!! His face makes me happy when I see him on here. I don't remember like, hardly anyone from all the D&D stuff that gets posted on here, but when I see him I'm like MY BOY LOU!! He's such a doll, truly. I actually am really charmed by Sam's design. It's so normal lol, like omg that's my cousin or something. I too love piglets, like sending me pictures of baby piglets will never go astray. Danielle just better with that color!! I tried color like that once, it didn't stick 😭 I gotta commit stronger. This was a joy to read!

Hot Chocolate: I was actually just watching a video on Aabria! It was complimenting the way she paints the scenes in a cinematic fashion, that really immerses you into the setting and story. This is something I plan on trying when I DM in the near future, so she is definitely inspirational! Lou Wilson strikes again! I need to watch him play, because I feel like I'm missing an amazing time and inspiration for characters that I play. I'm so interested in the world of this campaign because what the hell is going on??? Lol thanks for putting me on!

[voxaholic]

Character Info For My Bojack Inspired Human Au

Hollywood Losers Au

Val & Vox

-Hollywood’s messiest on and off couple of just about 20 years

-extremely codependent: Val makes messes, Vox cleans them up, that’s how they work

-Vox has a shit ton of spyware on all Val’s phones and a tracker on his car and it’s only partially out of insane possessiveness. Vox’s creepy bullshit has saved Val’s life on occasion 

-“Did you hide my fucking guns, Vox?” “Yes! And the fact that you’re even looking for them right now means I’m really glad I did!”

-Met on a set when Vox was still an actor and have been making each other miserable ever sense

-Gossip rags love them. Every piece of info about them is insane

-There are at least three twitter accounts keeping track of whether they are on or off again

-Neither of them would classify the relationship as abusive but from the outside observer, it definitely is

-Val is under the assumption that Vox is happy with their status quo and Vox is, until he isn’t 

-Velvette thinks one of them is going to end up killing the other eventually 

-they get into a lot of very physical fights. Vox usually comes out worse for wear

-see when a person with a disorganized attachment style and someone with an anxious attachment style get into a situationship…

Val

-43 but still lives and dresses like he’s in his early 20s

-semi washed-up actor that got his start on some sort of law and order-esque tv show

-has bleached and dyed his poor hair far beyond repair but it is still hanging in there somehow

-has had six PR managers quit on him over the last year and a half alone

-personal life goal is to do every drug once

-trying to fill the hole in his heart with hedonism. he thinks it’s working (it is not)

-self identified queer icon

-lots and lots of shallow acquaintances/fuck buddies, very few people he would consider close

-interested in the concept of a pet but every pet he’s ever had has either died of neglect or been taken in by Vox

-outward narcissism hides a deep yawning insecurity that he’s not even fully aware of

-self sabotages a lot

-likes to be taken care of and babied but only by Vox

-retweets his own callout posts on twitter (Vox deletes the retweets but screenshots exist)

-afraid of committing himself to anything

Vox

-45 and dresses like it

-greying early (he says it’s because of Val and Val thinks he’s joking. he isn’t)

-officially Val’s agent but also unofficially, his pr manager because every actual hired PR manager keeps quitting 

-a fake bitch who doesn’t give a shit about 99% of people

-unfortunately once he starts giving a shit about someone he can’t really stop giving a shit

-has run several financial scams

-has done so much white collar crime

-gotten Val off for so much shit, like really, so much fucking shit

-briefly a child actor. it ended badly 

-apathetic about most things outside of work but fakes it well enough 

-always has like 18 different side projects going

-wants to marry Val to finally get some sense of stability in their relationship

-a control freak who needs to know what Val is up to 24/7

-the one who cooks in the relationship. he’s not good at it and Val complains constantly about how bland his food is but he still eats it

-has a blue pitbull puppy named Vark who he loves like a son

-he’s THAT type of dog dad

[kosije]

a/n: never have unprotected sex with strangers! only read about it <3 also this is a old work i just added a bit onto...

cw: mdni, mechanic!hawks x fem!reader, use of doll/ma'am/miss, unprotected sex, missionary, pretty vanilla, simp behavior by hawks, reader calls him keigo, corny dialogue, horrible capitalization (im so srry), probably wont edit this lol...

It's been hours. It's been hours and you're dripping sweat despite the multitude of cold drinks you've ingested from the vending machine in your local auto care. You just took your car in for an oil change and regretted not getting a bus ride back. The more the round clock above the register desk clicked, the more impatient you're getting and the smell of gasoline was hurting your head. After bobbing your leg up and down a little more, you decide to just go out and check on your car.

"Hey! Uh, my car was scheduled to be done 30 minutes ago. Is there any way I can check on it right now? Do you have an ETA of some sort?"

The receptionist, a dark-haired boy with a red choker, looks up empathetically before clicking his keyboard.

"Sorry miss, I dunno much about that, but let me call up your mechanic. What number are you?"

"3389"

"3....3....8- oh Hawks is working on that one! I'll call to see if you can get buzzed in, but no need to worry. He is our fastest and most skilled mechanic, so your car will be good as new as soon as he's done."

The boy's voice becomes the slightest bit animated and you feel your annoyance tone down. But you didn't care if it was "good as new," just as long as you could get home safe.

"Okay, thank you."

His fingers quickly punch into a corded phone before a voice comes on the other line.

"He said it should be done in 2, but you're more than welcome to go in."

You nod and thank the teen before stumbling past wired gates and stray cigarettes before finding your car. It looks damn good. Originally a somewhat hand-me-down from your mother to yourself, it was always beautiful on the outside. The silhouette was a classic thing. real sleek and "real groovy" according to your mother. But the upsides stopped at the exterior.

The ac was loud, and the radio was spotty. Even the leather seats were chipping, despite the multitude of repairs you've paid for out of pocket.

But now the car looks brand new. The shell of your car is clean and shiny. When you open the door, you're pleasantly surprised by the smell of musky cologne and your clean linen car freshener, and even more surprised when you can't see where the patches of missing leather are. you almost let yourself smile before realizing this might be a scam to force you to pay for the advancements.

You're too busy peeking into your interior to notice another person walking up.

"Is this ya car, or you lookin' for a ride to jack?"

You flinch slightly but recover yourself well enough to turn to face the deep voice and a rush of heat flushes over you. Sharp amber eyes run over your figure as you busy yourself with getting a good look at the man leaning against the bumper of your car. messy blonde hair, healthy tan, scruff, and muscular. All things you like, except (so far) his personality.

"And you are?"

"The mechanic, doll," He replies in a "duh" voice, slipping his arms out of his dirtied blue denim overalls and crossing them over the other. You don't miss how his biceps flex slightly at the gesture.

"You got anything else to ask, or are you jus’ gonna keep checking me out?"

"I wasn't checking you out."

"Whatever makes you feel better," He laughs, walking up only to lean on the steel table behind you.

"Look this is my car-" He cuts you off by reading your name off a stray paper that has dirt and oil on it, raising an eyebrow and you nod a confirmation.

He offhandedly purrs something about the name being pretty, and you have to consciously ignore the burn in your cheeks.

"Just tell me how much the repair is gonna cost," the question comes out with a sigh, and now it's your turn to cross your arms. It's done out of attitude, but when his eyes lower to focus on your chest, electricity trickles down your spine.

"You gonna answer or keep checking me out?"

coughing and readjusting himself on the table, he tells you $110.

"Are you kidding? The oil change was 60!"

"I did a whole lot besides an oil change, doll"

"without my consent! This has got to be illegal!" 

"Well, how about this?" he says, moving closer to you, and you can now see just how much he dwarfs you in size. "You pay $40 bucks, and let me take you out to dinner."

well... that wasn't something you were expecting.

"I don't know you."

"I know."

"You don't know me."

"Let's change that then." He says. The smirk he has is toothy and could almost be seen as sweet if he didn't just try to scam you out of $50. After another beat of silence, he talks again.

"Don't be brutal, doll. You know you're just as excited to see where this goes."

"I don't usually date scammers." You finally say, but it's meek and you instantly regret it because all he does is smile wider.

"There's a first for everything."

... 

You don't know why you agreed and gave him your number and address. But you did. You also don't know why you're wearing such an expensive dress and perfume. Or why you're putting on makeup. But you are. It was all too elaborate for a one-off date with a random man. Nevertheless, here you were, crouching down to put your bobby pins in your hair because your dress didn't allow for enough movement.

There are three quick knocks at your door before you hear Hawk's voice. 

"I'm starving, doll. Don't leave me like this." 

Bastard

You quickly give yourself a one-over and head to the door. When you open it you see Hawks, except he looks different. His hair is neatly brushed back, and he swapped his stronger cologne for a much more elegant one that matches even better with yours. simple suit and tie with square-cut earrings.

"you look good" he looks better than good, but you don't wanna say anything that'll inflate his ego more.

"you look perfect," and he punctuates it by saying your name instead of 'doll' and you like the way it sounds more than you thought.

Hovering over you now with one arm on the doorframe. He stretches out a hand with a small grin.

"May I? " You place your hand in his.

"You May."

...

5 things you've learned about Hawks Keigo so far

1. his real name is Keigo, hawks being a nickname he got in his youth because of his speed and eyes

2. his hand is much larger than yours

3. he has great taste in restaurants

4. his favorite food is yakitori (a new favorite of yours too)

5. he's ready to go back to your place

"How was your food?"

"It was actually... great"

"C'mon, don't act all reluctant! This restaurant has never done me wrong!" He says as you shift the air conditioner to fan your face and turn the radio up a bit.

"Right, yakitori connoisseur. I can see why you'd take your dates here."

"You're the first." He says emphasizing the last part with a sly look over to your spot in the passenger seat of his Mercedes. It's an admission that has a smile threatening to find a home on your lips, but you turn your head to face outside the window and he chuckles knowingly.

"Or are you saying this should now be the spot? Cuz I could make that work."

"You sure know how to ruin a mood." You're laughing at his feigned hurt expression as he steers with one hand while the other goes over his heart.

"How rude!" He says before the hand over his heart falls to your thigh and suddenly you're hyperaware of how warm he is. "I'll make sure this spot is special to just you."

If the hand on your thigh wasn't enough, the sincerity of his tone has you reeling and reaching over his middle console to kiss him. Soft, short, and sweet on his cheek. You can hear his breath hilt and the smell of his cologne is stronger. When you pull back, you can see the mark of your lipstick on his cheek. And his hand squeezes your thigh tighter.

"You're driving me crazy, doll."

"...was that a pun because you're driving?"

"What?"

"I said-" 

he dramatically turns up the radio and you roll your eyes when he excessively mouths 'I can't hear you!' 

"YOU'RE LUCKY THIS SONG IS GOOD!" you yell into his ear and he laughs, drawing circles onto your thigh with his thumb. The ride back to your apartment is shorter than you'd like, but at least he walks you up to your door, right?

"I don't usually invite scammers into my house."

"yeah?" he asks, hands already on your waist and head tilted.

"but there's a first for everything, isn't there?"

"id like that," he says, smiling down at you as you walk backward into your living room.

His lips are feverish on yours, tongue exploring as deep as it can into your mouth until his and your lips are purple and swollen before drawing purple bruises all over your neck and chest, just over your tits. Your body is hot and you hurriedly pull your arms out of your dress and shimmy it off-eliciting a pleasured hum when he finds that you're not wearing a bra- as he quickly tosses his button-up and jacket before his lips are back onto yours. Your hands wrap around Keigo's neck and his hands cup under your ass and lift you up.

"First door on your right." 

Following your instructions, he walks with you to his arms to your room and tosses you on the familiar sheets of your bed.

"Do you want this?" he asks, hands working on his belt

"Please."

His jaw clenches, and in a second he's bare in front of you.

And big. Much bigger than you think you can take. Thick veins wrap around his cock and you can tell he shaved just for tonight. He runs a finger up and down your clothing slit. Your lips part and a soft sigh rolls off your tongue.

"Don't be a tease."

"Yes ma'am," his finger hooks on the edge of your lace panties and slides them off before running his cock up and down to gather your slick with a quiet groan. Without warning, he slides into you, and you're both vocal. after letting you adjust to his length, he slowly starts moving inside of you, then faster and you're whining around him.

"so pretty," comes out a gasp when his hands pull your legs over his shoulders.

"yer so pretty. And yer the tightest lil' thing I've ever had. Why don't we make an h-habit of this, hmm?" 

"The sex or–fuck–dinner?" You ask, trying to slow the coil in your gut with deep breaths.

"Both."

"That sounds like dating." 

"It's not–shiit"

"How so?" You ask, moaning into the back of your hand when he switches his angle and hits that spot that has you seeing stars.

"You don't date scammers," he says and you would laugh if you didn't have drool sliding down the side of your mouth. His eyes flicker to it and when he licks it up, only to kiss it back into your mouth, and your nails find his back and rake over the skin in an attempt to ground yourself.

"So...what...' bout...it," he asks between kisses and you roll your eyes. When you don't answer, he grunts and stalls all movements.

"What-"

"Answer me and I'll move." 

His eyes widen as he watches you move up and down on your own.

"Stubborn," he whispers out, still wide-eyed when his lips split into a grin. "you won't be able to fuck yerself the way I do it. So just be good 'nd-"

"Yes." you bite out. Your pride feels robbed, but you can tell he's right when you feel your stomach ache.

"Yes, what?"

He's moved again, but it's too slow for your liking and leaves you irritated. You're exactly where he wants you, and so—reluctantly — you mutter:

"Let's make this a habit!" 

An uncharacteristically soft hand cups your cheek and your stomach twist.

"I knew you could be good for me," he says, lips pressing into the side of your mouth and you're writhing. 

Speeding up again, you feel that familiar flame of pleasure ignite within you and tangle your hands into his blonde strands. The room is filled with slaps and moans and if you weren't so fucked out, you might've been able to hear your headboard knocking against the wall and how the mess of your nightstand slightly bounces from the source. Praises are whispered in between messy thrusts and you try your best to focus on the sweat running down your back to let the feeling of him inside you last longer, but your toes are curled and can taste blood from how hard you’re biting down on your lip. 

“Don't shy away now, I love that pretty voice of yours,” and his face looks so much in ecstasy that when his tip hits that spot in you again a pornographic moan leaves your lips, and the flood of pleasure hits you is as foreign as it is blissful. You almost gave no control of yourself. barely hushing yourself, barely able to unravel your legs from around his hips, all too consumed in your high. But Keigo is no better. When your legs ease the hold around his hips, he hurriedly pulls out, but not fast enough, and globs of white spray onto your pussy and all over your chest, even up to your neck. He can only pump himself a few more times before he's falling on top of you with a huff, knocking the air out of you. 

"U-P!" you gasp out, hitting his chest until he rolls over with a sheepish look.

"'M sorry," is all that he says before narrowing his eyes when you giggle.

"Didn't know nutting took that much energy out."

"me neither," he says, joining in on your giggles with a squawk-like laugh that makes you laugh even harder. "I've never come that hard."

"I'm flattered." You purr, smiling up at the ceiling. "I don't think ill be able to walk for a couple of days myself."

And you were joking, but when he laughs and hoists himself up with a hand on your thigh, the soreness humbles you and you realize there's more truth to that statement than you care to admit. You point to the bathroom and he nods, disappearing and reappearing with a damp rag and cleans you up. 

"How do you like your baths?"

"Warm." you twitch when he wipes over a sensitive part, earning a reassuring kiss on the cheek.

When he's done, he moves back into your bathroom and you can hear him turn on the faucet, and you stretch to your legs until the water is turned off and he's scooping you into his arms. When you've finished, he offers to carry you back to bed, but you insist on getting back on your own, even if your legs felt a bit wobbly. You slip into something comfortable while he puts on what he had on before, only now it's wrinkled. You expect him to leave immediately after he's dressed.

"what are you going to watch me sleep?"

"just waiting for you to invite me to stay the night"

"not gonna happen," you say and laugh at the way he pouts. "next time, maybe." And now you're laughing harder at how quickly his expression changed to a smile.

He leans down to kiss you long and slow, pulling away to leave a peck on your cheek. 

"Same time next week?" he asks, giving you another peck, this time along your cheek. You mumble an affirmation, eyes blissfully shut as his lips move to our neck.

"and the one after that. " And he's grinning against you again when he says this.

"Overzealous, don't ya think?" not missing the glint in his eyes when they meet yours again. Same gold that seems to shimmer close up.

"Just makin' a habit of it." Is all he says, same beautiful eyes looking down at you, same lopsided grin, now pretty purple marks on his neck. 

And all you can do is say,

"okay, same time next week."